Discovery

“My story’s a lot like yours, only more interesting because it involves robots.”
-Bender, Futurama

***

It came steadily from the darkened forest and down a deserted road, its metal hull gleaming under a bright sun. The metallic sound of its hooves hitting the stones in the dirt path was accompanied by the mechanical whirring of gears and a steady electric hum. It moved onward to its destination with precision, completely undistracted by sights or sounds. Birds and wild animals fled as soon as they saw this alien creature. It slowed only for a moment as it came to a bend in the road and saw a trail leading off the dirt road and through a gathering of trees. It was not a natural forest; these were all apple trees. An orchard.

Far in the distance, over the trees and the nearby hamlet, it saw a glimmer of light shining like a beacon from the crest of the distant castle. It tilted its head a moment, then looked at the path it was on and then turned and stared out over the orchard with unblinking violet eyes.

“Faster route determined,” it uttered to itself in a synthetic, echoing voice. “Proceeding to Ponyville.” The thing left the sunny road and entered the orchard, its gray metallic exterior almost blending in amid the thick shadows.

Soon, it would arrive.

***

“Today is the day, Cutie Mark Crusaders!” Apple Bloom declared, raising a hoof as she stood at the podium in their little clubhouse. “We’re gonna keep workin’ until we get our cutie marks in…” she paused for dramatic effect “...sculpture!”

“I’ve got a good feeling about this one!” Sweetie Belle chirped, rearing up and kicking her legs enthusiastically. “And I brought all the stuff we need for it!”

Scootaloo inspected each stack of materials, peering at them closely, squinting at each one as she circled it. “Wood, clay… wait, what’s with the rolled up wire stuff and the old copies of the Foal Free Press?”

“That’s chicken wire!”

Scootaloo was silent, narrowing her eyes as if anticipating some unwelcome, overused joke.

“It’s for paper mache!” Sweetie Belle explained.

“Oh! Then yeah, great!”

Apple Bloom raised an eyebrow at that last bit. “Paper? We couldn’t get one of those big ol’ rocks you always see artistic types workin’ with?”

Sweetie Belle sighed. “I asked the stallion at the quarry. He said a block of granite or marble was going to cost more than three fillies could afford on our allowances.”

“Well, that’s fine anyway,” Scootaloo said, lifting one of the papers with her hoof. “I think some of these old papers still have our ‘Gabby Gums’ columns in it. Probably good to make use of those even if we don’t get a cutie mark.”

The three young friends were in their clubhouse and were further behind schedule than they’d expected. It was getting fairly late in the afternoon to just begin their latest attempt at discovering their special talents and none of them even glanced out the window to notice the storm clouds being placed overhead by the weather team pegasi.

But the three were too engrossed in their little quest and their attempts to make some sort of statue or bust left them so busy that they didn’t even notice as the rain began to fall and the sun began to set. The hours slipped by and the darkness set in.

“Hey! Help me out, my hoof is stuck in this here clay!” Applebloom cried, angrily shaking the lump of clay she'd embedded her hoof into.

“It ish?” Scootaloo turned as she held the hammer in her mouth, momentarily stopping her chiseling on the block of wood to turn to Apple Bloom. In doing so, she dropped the hammer on one hoof. Shouting in momentary surprise and pain, she fell backward, knocking the unfinished sculpture over, chipping a chunk of the wood off entirely.

“Scootaloo, that’s the first time I’ve ever seen a pony knock their own block off,” Sweetie Belle said dryly.

“Oh ha ha,” Scootaloo grumbled, giving her a roll of her eyes as she crossed her forelegs. Then she brightened, seeing Sweetie Belle's sculpture. “Hey, that’s actually pretty good, Sweetie Belle!”

Sweetie Belle looked at her unfinished sculpture. “You think?” she asked, her eyes lighting up. The sculpture was slowly taking on the shape of a unicorn’s head, although the mane was only just being formed around the wire structure.

“Hey, yeah!” Apple Bloom agreed. “Is that supposed to be your sister?”

“Uh huh! I thought Rarity might like it!" She smiled, clapping her hooves together with anticipation. "I mean, I need to finish and maybe paint it, but… wait, what’s that sound?”

They froze and only now heard the hard rain splattering on the clubhouse window and loudly onto the rooftop. And then they looked up and saw a distinct drop of water forming in the roughly-constructed ceiling. And then that drop fell right onto Sweetie’s paper mache sculpture.

“Oh no," Sweetie gasped, eyes going wide as she ran for her sculpture, "I better move that before--”

The wooden ceiling suddenly gave and a large cascade of water came down, practically melting the sculpture before her eyes.

“My sculpture!” Sweetie cried, throwing her head back dramatically as she saw her hard work dissolve before her.

“Ah dang it, I can’t believe we forgot about the rainstorm today!” Apple Bloom shouted, stamping her hoof.

“It’s not just a rainstorm,” Scootaloo said quietly, her own eyes widening as she recalled the most important detail: “Earlier, I heard Rainbow Dash saying it’s gonna be--”

KABOOM!

“--a th-thunderstorm,” she finished. The three fillies huddled together, cowering at the peal of thunder.

“We better get back to my house before it gets worse!" Applebloom said, drawing herself up in determination. "Who knows if this old clubhouse can take a huge thunderstorm! Not to mention Applejack will be sore if we’re out any later!”

The three of them abandoned their sculptures and ran out into the storm, blinking into the fat, stinging rain that pelted them. The wind and rain were already strong and growing stronger and the sky began to flash and light up as lightning began to strike all across Ponyville. The booming, rumbling thunder rolled over the orchard as they ran, but they counted themselves lucky that the lightning didn’t seem close.

“Just a little more!” Apple Bloom called over her shoulder, grimacing as the rain drenched her.

And then with a deafening, explosive bang, a bolt of lightning came down no more than a hundred meters away, turning the darkened land momentarily bright as midday. The sound may as well have been the sky itself shattering and they all screamed, clutching each other as their ears rang.

“That was too close!” Scootaloo yelled.

“Wait a minute, did it hit one of the trees?” Sweetie Belle asked. “I see smoke!”

“And I think I smell somethin’ burnin’ too,” Apple Bloom said. They peered through the nearby trees but then they heard a strange sound as something came closer.

In a cloud of smoke, still searing hot from being struck by lightning, a strange thing emerged. It was the same size and shape as a pony, only…

“Is that thing covered in... metal?” Scootaloo whispered.

“It sure looks like it,” Apple Bloom said. The thing really was covered head to hoof with metal plates. Even the hooves seemed to be covered in metal. The constant sound of rain clattering on it, hissing into steam when it struck the hot metal became louder as it approached.

“Maybe it’s one of the Royal Guard?" Sweetie Belle suggested. "Is that why it’s wearing all that armor?” Sweetie Belle’s suggestion made sense, but it didn’t look like any armor any of them had ever seen. And that’s when they saw it staring at them, and they got a good look at its eyes.

They were glowing. Actually, they were flickering erratically, but the point was their appearance: bright purple with no pupils. They resembled a pair of flashlights more than any normal pair of eyes. The girls recoiled with fear at the sight as the stranger approached them, but then Apple Bloom’s sense of responsibility took over. She broke from the group and galloped over.

“Uh, e-excuse me, Miss or Mister,” she said, trying to speak up over the rain. “Are you okay? Did ya get struck by lightning? Do ya need any help?”

The thing’s walking was shakier now and they could all hear the loud clanking as it took each wobbly step. But it managed to keep walking as it made some kind of weird, jittering reply: “T-T-T-T-T-T-T-T--”

“What’s that?" Applebloom asked, turning her head and raising an ear. "Can ya speak up?” The pony or whatever it was in the armor had a strange, metallic voice and it somehow didn’t quite sound like somepony speaking inside a suit of armor. It reverberated and there was a bizarre distortion to it that was unlike anything they'd ever heard.

“T-T-T-T-TWI-TWI-TWI-LIIIIII,” it stopped and then, its legs giving out as it took a few final steps, it made one more attempt at speech. “TWI-TWIIIIIIILIIIIIIIIIGHHHT S-S-SPAAARKLE-KLE-KLE-KKKKzzzt!”

The thing finally gave a distorted wheeze as it stumbled and pitched forward, collapsing loudly in a smoldering heap as its purple eyes went dark.

“Oh my gosh!” Apple Bloom cried, running over to check the pony's neck for a pulse.

“W-w-what do you think it is?” Sweetie Belle asked fearfully.

“I don’t know, but we can’t worry about it now!" Applebloom said, turning to them with wide, fearful eyes. "We gotta get Applejack and get this pony to a hospital!”

***

Twilight moved briskly up the hallway at Ponyville General Hospital that night. At the castle, a nurse had come banging loudly on her door with a message from Applejack. According to the message, she was needed as soon as possible. Fortunately, the nurse assured her that neither Applejack nor her family nor any of their friends were hurt. The nurse had only told her one thing: "You need to see this."

The rain outside had slowed to a light drizzle, so she shook the excess rainwater off her dampened mane. She rounded a corner and at the end of the hallway, standing just before the doors of the operating room, she spotted Applejack and a doctor.

“Twilight!” Applejack called, waving to her when she saw her approaching.

“Sh!” the doctor hissed, holding a hoof to his lips. “Some of the patients in the nearby wings are probably sleeping.”

“Ah, right, sorry,” she apologized, lowering her voice.

Twilight walked up to them and smiled, although she could not keep in place for long.

“Um, good evening Applejack, doctor,” she said. “I'm sorry, but I'm confused: your note seemed urgent, so I came as quickly as I could, but it also said nopony was hurt. What happened?”

Applejack and the doctor exchanged glances.

“Well,” the doctor began, “I can assure you that nopony is injured, but this is a special case." He narrowed his eyes. "I have never seen anything like this.”

“Wait, I remember you,” she said to the doctor, her eyes lighting up and a smile on her face. “You treated my friend Rainbow Dash when she hurt her wing!”

“Yes, and then she broke into my hospital and tried to steal a book,” he said, smirking, though he managed a smile as well.

“Oh... that's right.” She rubbed the back of her neck, chuckling.

“Water under the bridge, Miss Twilight.” He put his hoof out. "Dr. Stable, for the record." She took his hoof and shook it.

“Ahem," Applejack said, coughing deliberately. "Gettin’ to the point...”

“Oh, yes, of course. What happened?” Twilight asked.

“Well,” Applejack began, “it seems Apple Bloom and her Crusader friends were out a bit later than they meant to be. They got caught in the storm and made a run to get back to the house when they came across this pony wearin' armor.”

“Armor?” Twilight echoed. “Like, maybe one of the Royal Guard?”

“That’s what she figured. But she said it’d been struck by lightning!”

Twilight turned to the doctor, her mouth agape. “But... but you said nopony was injured!”

“That's right, nopony was. Just keep listening, you’ll understand,” Dr. Stable said, holding up a hoof.

Applejack continued her story: “Apple Bloom got Big Mac and me and we found it. Didn't talk, didn't seem to be breathin', and we couldn't get a pulse or nothin' from it. We were worried it was too late, but we decided to haul it over to the hospital to see if they could help. And you wouldn’t believe this, but," and here she looked at Twilight intently, "it took both of us to load it into the cart.”

"What? Both of you?!" Twilight's eyes went wide. "But how? Even with armor on, a single pony shouldn't be too heavy for a strong mare like you to lift, Applejack! And Big Macintosh could probably lift 10 ponies if he had to!"

“I know, I know, but we didn't think too much of it," Applejack said. "We just loaded it up brought it on over to the hospital and then--”

“--And then my team took over,” Dr. Stable finished, adjusting his glasses. “And Miss Applejack wasn’t lying. It took several team members to get it onto the operating table. We weren’t able to tell if there was a pulse or if it was breathing or anything like that, so we tried to remove the armor. And it wasn’t easy. It seemed to actually be bolted or even welded around the body. It seemed impossible to even pry off a single plate, but we finally got the side chest plate off after nearly half an hour of trying frantically. And then we found out something: it’s not armor. There was no pony inside at all.”

Twilight blinked and shook her head. “How can that be?” she asked. Then she raised a hoof to her chin and narrowed her eyes. “Unless... unless the armor was enchanted, perhaps? But that shouldn’t have affected the weight. Could it have had a gravitational distortion spell added, or perhaps an ethereal weight variance? Still, how could it have been empty? There should have been a concentrated magical field inside! No, no, there has to be some other explanation...”

“I didn’t say it was empty,” the doctor said, and with that, he turned and beckoned them both to enter the operating room. He pushed the doors open and gestured toward the operating table. “I just said there was no pony inside. But instead, we found all this.”

Twilight’s eyes went wide. “Wow,” she breathed.

The thing on the operating table was covered in metal which gleamed under the bright operating room lights. Laying on its side, it did look just like a sleeping, unconscious pony, but only at first glance. The mane and tail were clearly artificial, each made of a series of conical, flexible white tubes. The hooves weren’t merely covered in brass - they were brass! The eyes appeared to be covered by a glass visor, but the space behind them was now darkened and no eyes were visible. But most telling of all was that, with the chest plate removed, Twilight could now see the thing’s innards. Gears and wires and tubes were there in place of flesh and bone.

“It’s... it's a machine!” she gasped, her jaw going slack as she stared at the mechanical pony laid out before her.

“Indeed. I don’t know how to explain it, but Miss Applejack’s sister apparently encountered some sort of..." he tilted his head, pausing as he searched for the right word. "...Some sort of artificial pony. If I didn't know better, I'd say that this must be--”

“An automaton!” Twilight cried excitedly, bounding toward the machine. She laid her hooves on the operating table and she smiled, awestruck at the marvel before her. “I’ve only ever seen one in a museum! And this one… wow! It’s got, let’s see, clockwork here,” she said, peering inside the thing, “a lot of gears... and vacuum tubes here, and… oh oh oh, is that a magical step-up transformer attached to a chemical battery?! And there are other things I can’t quite see inside it. We’d have to remove more of the exterior. This is unbelievable! It’s too bad it was damaged by the lightning; some of the parts look burnt.”

Applejack stepped forward. “So, this contraption is just some kinda model or mannequin? Like a movin' statue?”

“No, no, it's more than that!" Twilight said, whirling around, gripping Applejack's shoulders. "An automaton can move and do simple tasks! Automata, or ‘Simulacra’ as the pony-shaped versions are sometimes called, were all the rage about a hundred years ago! Of course, they were expensive and couldn’t do much and they fell out of favor for some reason, but I totally see why Apple Bloom thought that it might have been a real pony. It's just the right size and shape, but," she paused, her excitement giving way to curiosity as she released Applejack and rubbed her chin, "I wonder how it got in your orchard?" She furrowed her brow. "Someone must have just dumped it there.”

Applejack shook her head. “No, Twilight, I saw the hoofprints it made myself and Apple Bloom swears she saw it move toward her. Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle said the same thing. This here Otto-whatever got into my orchard by walkin’ there.”

Twilight froze. "Did you see anypony else nearby?"

Applejack blinked. "Uh, no. There was nopony else. Why?"

“That can’t be right. They were built to move and sometimes dance and things like that, but they had preset motions." She nodded to herself. "Yes, there must have been an operator. Without an operator nearby, it could never navigate through your apple orchard. Not independently. It would have bumped into trees and gotten stuck. You must be mistaken.”

Applejack frowned and drew herself up. “Well, it can navigate through the trees because that's exactly what it did!” Applejack insisted, poking her in the chest. “And there’s one more thing you gotta know, Twi, and this is the reason I had ‘em send for ya: Apple Bloom and the other girls swear this thing talked.”

Twilight's eyes bulged. "That's... that's impossible. I've studied these machines before and I've seen deactivated old models in museums. Admittedly, they never looked as sophisticated or modern as this one, but in all my studies, I've never read any account of an automaton that could speak. That's the stuff of fiction." She paused. “But if it really could speak, then... then what did it say?”

Applejack hesitated. “Your name, Twilight,” she finally replied. “I asked her if she was sure, but Apple Bloom swears that the last thing it said before it keeled over was your name.”

Twilight felt her blood go cold. "My name? But why me?"

"No idea, Twi," Applejack replied, her frown deepening. "That's why we called ya."

Twilight took a deep breath. Fidgeting with her wings she began to pace back and forth in the operating room, muttering to herself as she tried to work out what to do next. “An automaton… walking, talking like a normal pony… just moving independently… functional remote control… magical enchantment? No, no, too sophisticated… New technological advances? It can’t be so advanced, but the evidence… this is… oh my gosh, this can’t be… but it is! It is!... Oh gosh, what do I do now?...”

Dr. Stable leaned over to Applejack. “Is this, um… normal behavior?” he whispered.

“Heh. For her it is,” she replied with a smirk.

“I just mention it because we do have a very restful mental health wing provided for ponies who mutter to themselves...”

“I’ve got it!” Twilight exclaimed suddenly, her wings opening as if to punctuate her decision. “Doctor, do you think you can get some volunteers to help Applejack and me bring this automaton back to my castle?”

He blinked at the sudden question but then nodded. “I suppose so. It doesn’t seem we have any other injuries from the storm tonight. Guess some ponies decided to actually listen to the weather team for once,” he grumbled, giving a roll of his eyes. “It’s a quiet night, so perhaps the orderlies could use a little exercise. I'll get them right on it.”

Applejack eyed Twilight carefully, turning her head to the side. “Uh, why exactly are we haulin’ this thing back to the castle in the middle of the night, Sugarcube?”

Twilight now flashed a grin. “We just stumbled across one of the most amazing scientific discoveries in decades and it knows my name! It’s broken, though, so if we want to find out why it was looking for me, there’s only one thing to do: I’m going to fix it!”

She turned to run back down the hall, looking over her shoulder as she went. “I’ll go get a room ready at the castle. I’ll meet you back here in just a few minutes!”

“If you say so,” Applejack said, watching her go. She turned to the doctor. “Uh, before we get this goin’, um…" she lowered her voice and shifted her eyes to the left, making sure the hallway was clear. "Could I see ya about that problem again?”

Dr. Stable nodded, though he gave her a tired look. “Yes, I’ll set up an appointment for tomorrow, but I doubt it’ll be any different from what I always say,” he replied.

“Right, right,” she said, looking disappointed. “Thanks, Doc.”

***

The next day, Twilight gathered her friends in a small room of the castle. The mechanical pony was on a table in much the same state it had been found earlier. Twilight had removed several more metal plates from its exterior, revealing the bizarre metallic framework inside. They could now see the pistons in its legs and the tubing leading up through the neck and a host of other machinery that filled the body. A twisting network of wires connected it all together. Twilight had also placed stacks of books and papers all around the room.

“Well, everypony, here it is!” Twilight exclaimed, sweeping her foreleg out dramatically. “This could be one of the most amazing advances in science since the invention of the train!”

They all looked to Twilight, then to the machine, and then back to her.

“Uh, no offense, Twilight,” Rainbow Dash said, raising an eyebrow, “but what exactly is so special about a pony made of metal?”

“I agree,” Rarity said. She made a face, shaking her head at it disapprovingly. “Looking at it, especially with its inner workings showing like that, it is rather, well, garish, don’t you think?”

Twilight frowned in annoyance. “I know it looks strange, but this could be something amazing! Think of what you could do with something like this!”

Pinkie Pie bounced over to Twilight excitedly. “Exactly!” she said. “I had a mechanical pony toy like this once! You wound it up with a key and it went all WHRRRRR and it moved around on wheels on its hooves and the horn lit up and everything! It was really cool... until my dad sat on it and then it didn’t work so well.”

“Uh, Pinkie--”

“But a toy this big is way too big for anypony’s dad to sit on it! I bet this thing could stand up to TEN dad butts!”

Twilight sighed but smiled. “Well, it’s not a toy, Pinkie, but you are right: this machine should be really sturdy. It could probably stand up to all sorts of punishment." She smirked. "Dad butts included!”

“Woohoo!”

“Well, not for nothin’, Twilight,” Applejack said, “but why would you need it to take any punishment?”

“Think of it like this,” Twilight began, tapping her chin in thought. “Um… oh, I know! Fluttershy?” She pointed her hoof in Fluttershy's direction.

“Hm? Sorry, what?” she asked. She had been staring at the automaton uneasily, not really following the conversation until Twilight got her attention.

“Imagine one of your animals got into a dangerous situation," Twilight said. "Like, say, if Angel fell in a hole or there was an earthquake or storm and he got trapped inside a collapsing building.”

“Oh my goodness!” she cried, putting her hooves to her cheeks, practically tearing up at the thought. “That’d be awful!”

“Exactly. Now imagine--”

“He would be so scared! And maybe hurt! And hungry! And I would do my best to save him, but what if it was too dark in the hole? Or the building was on fire?!”

“Um, Fluttershy--”

“Or what if he broke his poor little bunny leg?! Oh no, no, no!” she shouted, shaking her head back and forth hysterically.

“FLUTTERSHY,” Twilight said, moving in close to face her. “Yes, that would be terrible, but you wouldn’t have to worry. And do you know why?”

“Huh? Oh, uh, no. Why?”

“Because this could save him!” she said, gesturing toward the automaton. “A mechanical pony, an automaton as strong as a whole team of the toughest stallions, totally immune to pain and fear, has come to rescue Angel! Your pet will be safe and nopony has to go into a dangerous situation and get hurt in the process!”

Fluttershy's eyes went wide and she gasped. “Wow! That's amazing!” She smiled broadly, enchanted by the prospect and even clapped her hooves together. “Oh, Twilight, that’s such a great idea! Do you really think it could do something like that?”

“I do,” Twilight said. She turned to look at all of her friends now, her gaze turning serious. “I don’t know who built this automaton, but if it can move independently like Applejack said it was doing, then we could be doing Equestria a huge favor by fixing it. Who knows, maybe the inventor of this machine is looking for it and will be grateful to us for fixing it!”

The others seemed to understand and one by one voiced their general agreement. Applejack, however, just coughed to get everypony's attention.

“Now, this is all fine and good, Twi, but don’t forget that this thing came around sayin’ your name. It was lookin’ for ya." She looked to the silent automaton and then back to Twilight. "Ya don’t think that’s even a little bit suspicious? Maybe… I don’t know, maybe we shouldn’t try fixin’ it. What if some evil pony sent it after ya?”

Twilight smiled and put her hoof on Applejack’s shoulder. “I have thought about that. And that’s why I brought you all here. It isn’t going to hurt anypony now, not when it’s still broken. But if we fix it, maybe we can find out together what it wanted with me. It might be dangerous, but maybe somepony sent it to get my help. And if that’s the case, then maybe they need all our help. We are a team, after all, right?”

“Right!” they all shouted.

At that moment, the door opened and Spike entered, carrying another book and a blank scroll. “Here’s that last book you asked for, Twilight. I got it from the public library. It’s got some information on old automata from East Trottingham.”

“Thanks, Spike! Okay, so on to business, everypony! I know this might take some time, but I need your help.”

“I was starting to wonder,” Rarity asked. “I must admit, though, I’m not very good with repair work.”

“Yeah, if it’s a barn or a busted fence, then I’m your pony,” Applejack said, “but I don’t know a thing about contraptions like this.”

“Actually,” Twilight said, blushing slightly, “I don’t really know much about this type of machine either. I’m more familiar with potions and devices that work with magical energy. And it seems this automaton works with a few magical devices, but the rest? I have no idea. Even if we don’t know what these things are, however, all these books should help us figure out what the parts are. I’ve already taken some pictures and I’m going to write to Princess Celestia to ask if she can send an expert on technology to help us. But if we can identify some of the different parts first, that’ll help whoever she sends!”

“Ugh,” Rainbow Dash grumbled, sliding to the floor, “more studying?”

“Just enough to find pictures and stuff that matches,” Twilight assured her. “You don’t have to read the whole book. Just skim it.”

“Eh, I guess I could do that. It would be pretty cool to try and get this bucket of bolts up and running.”

Twilight levitated a book over to her. “This might be a good place to start, then. It’s a book on antique automata that could fly.”

“Whoa! They had those?!” Dash leaned forward, taking the book excitedly.

“Yep. Not too far or fast, but they still had them! And I’ve got a few more. One on mechanical animals for Fluttershy, dancing clockwork displays for Rarity, musical ones for Pinkie, and even one on attempts to make automata that could do farm labor for Applejack!”

They all took their respective books eagerly, with the exception of Applejack, who took her book with a sarcastic “Yeah, swell,” muttered under her breath.

While the others began their task of identifying the parts of the machine, Twilight and Spike took to writing the letter.

“Ahem. ‘Dear Princess Celestia,’” Twilight dictated as Spike wrote her words down. “‘Something amazing has happened in Ponyville! My friends and I have discovered a broken mechanical pony, an automaton, just like the kinds that were popular a hundred years ago. However, this one seems new, and supposedly it could move on its own. I’d like to fix it, but I need some expert help. Could you please send somepony who knows a lot about machines to help us? There must be somepony, perhaps in Canterlot, who knows something about this. I look forward to hearing back from you soon. Sincerely yours, Twilight Sparkle.’”

“Okay, got it,” Spike said. “Anything else?”

“Make sure to enclose the photographs we took, okay?”

“No problem,” Spike said, folding them into the scroll. “Here goes!” Using his magical fire breath, he sent the letter, watching it disappear into the ether.

“I can’t wait to see who she recommends!” Twilight said eagerly, clapping her hooves together.

A few moments later, she got her reply as Spike belched forth a scroll with the royal seal on it. “Wow, she sent a reply already!”

The other ponies stopped their reading as Spike unfurled the letter. “Okay… ‘Dear Princess Twilight,’” he began, reading the reply. “‘Automata were only a novelty in their day and nothing more. Somepony else wasted their time making it, so they will surely come looking for it. I don’t think it’s necessary for a Princess of Equestria to...’ uh, whoa,” Spike said, pausing.

“What? What is it, Spike?” Twilight asked.

“Um," he swallowed, continuing hesitantly, "she says, ‘I don’t think it’s necessary for a Princess of Equestria to waste her time on such things as well. I recommend you leave it as it is or else have it scrapped so you may focus on your role as Princess of Friendship. Kindest regards, Princess Celestia.’”

They were all silent.

“Wow,” Rainbow Dash said, breaking the silence. “She doesn’t seem that interested, Twilight.”

“Maybe she’s right,” Applejack said. “I mean, really, what does this have to do with Friendship anyway?”

“Not everything I spend my time on has to be a royal duty,” Twilight said, rolling her eyes. “But you’re right, Rainbow Dash. Princess Celestia usually supports any research I do. I wonder why she seems so uninterested. It’s not like her." She sat, closing her eyes and folding her forelegs, trying to think of the answer. "Well... I'm not sure of her reasons, but no matter. This is important to me, so let’s try again. Spike, can you take another letter?”

“Of course,” he said, readying a second scroll.

“Then let’s try this. ‘Dear Princess Celestia: I know this isn’t part of my royal duties, but this might actually be more important than I originally stated. The girls who found this mechanical pony all claim that it said my name before it broke down. Even though there are no records of a talking automaton, I absolutely believe them when they say this. Whoever created this advanced machine specifically sent it to find me. I don’t want to leave this mystery unsolved. I would greatly appreciate your help in restoring it so we can get to the bottom of this. Your dear friend, Twilight Sparkle.’”

“Nice,” Rainbow Dash said, smiling and nodding her head approvingly.

“That’s sure to work!” Spike agreed, sending the letter.

A few minutes later, they got their reply. “‘Dear Princess Twilight,’” Twilight said, reading this one aloud herself. “‘I still have my doubts, as I personally lived through the heyday of automata and simulacra, and you are correct: never once did I hear of such a thing as one that could talk or move on its own. If that is true, however, then perhaps you are right and this mystery should be solved. I believe I know of somebody who would be of great help. Allow me to contact him and I will let you know if I can arrange for him to assist you in Ponyville. Please be very careful, however. I fear that whoever sent this machine may seek to do you harm. I wish you and your friends the best of luck with your research and repairs. Sincerely, Princess Celestia.’”

“Oh my, that went much better!” Fluttershy exclaimed. “But, um, did anypony else catch that she said she knew of ‘somebody,’ and not ‘somepony?’”

Twilight considered it. “Maybe it’s a mistake?”

The next day, she would learn that it was not a mistake.

To be continued...

The Future Soon

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The very next afternoon, Twilight was at the train station waiting on the platform with Fluttershy and Rarity. The others were occupied elsewhere, but Fluttershy was curious as to what sort of creature was coming if they were indeed not a pony and Rarity was keen on meeting anyone of interest.

“Twilight, I beg your pardon, but could you refresh me again on this fellow?” Rarity asked. “What’s his name again, Mr… Vanderbull?”

“That’s right. Cornelius Vanderbull,” Twilight said, nodding as she kept looking up and down the tracks. “I really don’t know that much about him personally, but professionally he’s actually well known as one of the greatest engineers living today! He designs trains and actually owns two thirds of all the railroad companies in Equestria. He’s pretty wealthy too. He commissioned the Grand Central Depot in Manehatten and donated the money for the new science wing at Canterlot University!”

“Oh my, he sounds like quite the celebrity!" She took on a starry-eyed look. "And Grand Central Depot is such a wonderful place in Manehatten. I simply marvel at the design!”

“I wonder why nopony knows what he looks like,” Fluttershy said, fidgeting with her mane. “I mean, if he’s so important, you’d think he would be in newspapers. Or magazines. Or maybe have a statue of himself at all the train stations.”

Twilight considered this, jutting her lip out as she tilted her head side-to-side. “Maybe he’s just shy."

“Oh! You think?” Fluttershy asked, raising her head more, smiling gently.

However, they wouldn’t have to wait long to meet the as-yet-unseen Mr. Vanderbull, as a whistle was heard and they all saw the oncoming train as it rolled down the tracks from the hills and approached them.

“My, my, that’s quite a train!” Rarity exclaimed.

Indeed it was. The image of a bull’s head was emblazoned on the front of the engine, which itself was colored black with gold accents on the smokestack and wheels. The train was only a few cars long, but each car was a deep red with the same gold accents on the windows and rooftops in stark contrast to the usual pastel-colored cars they were used to. Also on each of the cars was the same word, boldly painted in official-looking capital letters: COMMODORE.

“I didn’t realize Mr. Vanderbull was coming on his private train,” Twilight whispered. “He must have wanted to avoid any delays coming from Manehatten.”

The train gave one last hiss of steam and a screech as the wheels came to a stop right in front of them. After a few moments, a figure emerged from the lead car, his silhouette momentarily enshrouded in steam, but then he stepped into full view. The three of them had to crane their necks at the tall creature as he stepped forward.

“Oh my,” Fluttershy breathed, putting a hoof to her mouth. “Mr. Vanderbull is… a minotaur?”

Vanderbull was, indeed, a minotaur, although Fluttershy’s response was out of surprise more than fear. Still, minotaurs weren’t a common sight in Equestria, so for such a well-known name to be attached to one would have been a surprise to anyone.

“Ah, Your Highness!” Mr. Vanderbull shouted jovially when he spotted Twilight, waving to her as he walked over. He offered her a warm smile. “It is an honor. So kind of you to come greet me personally!”

Vanderbull was quite tall and muscular, but he wore a sophisticated black suit, vest, and tie over a white shirt along with a pair of gray breeches which covered his legs almost down to his cloven hooves. His fur was the same dull blue Fluttershy remembered seeing on Iron Will, but this creature appeared to be a bit older and had a tuft of a gray beard and an equally gray mane running from his head down the back of his neck. He also wore a pair of gold spectacles on a chain which was, curiously, tied and connected neatly around one of his horns. There were age lines in his face and a rasp to his voice.

“Thank you for coming, Mr. Vanderbull,” Twilight said brightly. “We appreciate your help solving this mystery.”

“It is my honor,” he said, bowing graciously.

“He certainly seems far better versed in social graces than that Iron Will fellow, don’t you think, Fluttershy?” Rarity whispered.

“Oh, yes, much,” she said, and the two of them let out a sigh of relief, letting their tension drain away.

“And you brought your friends,” Vanderbull went on, turning to face them. “Miss Fluttershy and Miss Rarity, correct?”

“Why, yes, that’s right!” Rarity replied, placing her hoof to her chest, flattered to be recognized. Fluttershy merely blushed and nodded.

“I hope you don’t mind, but I brought a guest as well,” he said to Twilight. He looked behind him and raised an eyebrow. “Hm? Now, where is that girl? I thought she was just behind me." He raised a hand to his mouth. "Gadget, will you come out here, please!” he called.

“C-coming, sir!” The speaker hurried out of the train, stumbling over her hooves and nearly falling onto the platform as she ran over to Vanderbull’s side. “Sorry, Commodore, I was just separating my personal bags from my tools. Mr. Alfredo and the others are getting the supplies and… and… eep!” This last outburst was upon seeing Twilight. She adjusted her glasses as if her eyes were deceiving her.

“Hello!” Twilight said, smiling in greeting and putting a hoof to her chest. “I’m Twilight Sparkle. It’s nice to meet you!”

The newcomer’s eyes went wide. “P-p-p-Princess Twilight! Y-your Highness, I didn’t know you were coming yourself!” She immediately bowed as low as she could, her head practically to the ground, her knees wobbling and her expression one of pure nerves. Her cheeks flushed and sweat appeared on her brow. Twilight didn’t think she’d ever seen a pony so flustered since meeting Fluttershy, and this pony gave her a run for her money. “My name… er, I am called G-gadget. Well, um, actually it’s Gadgette F. Giroux, from Vanhoover." She swallowed, quietly adding, "But uh… just… you know, 'Gadget' is fine.”

Mr. Vanderbull smiled down at her. “No need to be so distressed, my dear,” he said reassuringly. “Princess Twilight doesn’t seem like one to stand on ceremony.”

This seemed to cheer up the young mare slightly as she raised her head. She was an earth pony with a cream-colored coat of fur. In contrast to Vanderbull’s impeccable, dignified clothes, her style had a haphazard, chaotic look to it. She had a long, dark brown mane that drooped unstylishly over her brown eyes, which were themselves hidden behind a pair of cheap red plastic glasses. She was also wearing a slightly oversized black coat with pockets that were bulging with something metallic (if the jangling sound she made when she walked was any indication, that is). She was small, too, and judging from her voice, probably a few years younger than Twilight and her friends at least. Rarity guessed she was only a few years older than Sweetie Belle and the other Crusaders.

“Well, we should get going,” Twilight said, turning back to Vanderbull. “Do you both have your luggage?”

“My staff will be bringing my tools, actually,” Vanderbull said. Almost on cue, a group of butlers and maids filed out of the train pulling carts loaded up with official-looking crates and boxes as well as more conventional suitcases. Vanderbull turned to face the older stallion at the head of the group. “Alfredo, we’ll be taking these to the castle… er, with your permission, Princess?”

“Yes, by all means,” Twilight agreed.

“Very good, sir, Your Highness,” the head butler, Alfredo, uttered, bowing to her. He motioned to the other servants to follow.

“We can send the others to our hotel to drop off the personal luggage and secure our rooms,” Vanderbull said.

“Hotel? Don’t be silly!” Twilight laughed. “You’re helping me out so much, so I can put you both up in my house.”

“In y-your…” Gadget stammered. Her eyes went wide. “You mean your castle? Us? Me? Staying there?!”

“Um… yes," Twilight said with an uneasy smile. "Unless you’d rather not?”

“C-castle? With royalty?! To fix a working automaton?!” Gadget said these to nopony in particular and her gaze took on a faraway look. She started placed a hoof to her chest, breathing hard as if on the verge of having a heart attack, but a huge smile came to her face and her eyes were practically sparkling with elation.

“I think she’ll be fine with that, yes,” Vanderbull said chuckling. “Your hospitality honors us, Your Highness. Please, ladies, lead the way and we shall follow!”

***

The strange procession attracted some attention from the townsfolk in their short trip from the station to the castle. Twilight and Vanderbull walked side-by-side in front, followed by Gadget who was flanked on either side by Fluttershy and Rarity. Alfredo and the servants hauling the supplies took up the rear in single file.

“A wonderful town here to be sure,” Vanderbull said. “It reminds me a bit of the hamlet I grew up in.”

“Oh?” Twilight asked, turning to look up at her guest with interest. “And where was that?”

“A little minotaur settlement outside of Equestria." He shrugged, apparently considering it unimportant.

"I don't know much about minotaur culture!" Twilight cried, her smile growing wider. "What sort of place was it?"

"It was lovely and peaceful but dull to the point of being torturous. There were farms and there was a quarry and there was a pub. Nothing to do but choose a job in one of those places, get married, and ride out the rest of your life." He made a face and sighed. "There was little there for me, and so I came here, to Equestria, to seek my fortune. Despite the surplus of labor and magic, there was still plenty of work to be had by one with a strong back and these handy little digits,” he said, wiggling his fingers for emphasis, chuckling to himself. “I became fascinated with the early engine designs going around at the time and fell in with a ship-building company that specialized in steamboats. That was when I got my nickname, 'Commodore,' for the record.

"I managed to improve upon some steam engine designs and developed a knack for them. Eventually, I became one of the heads of the business and we went from boats to other small-time machines and finally to designing trains, which were poised to take their place in society. We managed to overcome the odds and expenses and became the first train company to connect Manehatten and Canterlot with daily trips after I became president. Ah, but that was almost 40 years ago. Listen to me, I must be boring you, Your Highness!”

“Not at all!” Twilight said, actually taking flight so she could be at eye level with Vanderbull. “You must have studied hard to get where you are!”

“There wasn’t anything to study, to tell you the truth,” Vanderbull replied, looking somewhat embarrassed as he rubbed the back of his neck. “We were all making it up as we went in those days. You learned by doing, not by reading." Then he smiled, turning to look back at his quiet young assistant. "Not so for you, though, is it, Gadget?” he asked, winking at her.

“Hm? O-oh, yes,” Gadget said, blushing slightly.

“I really must say, he seems to think quite highly of your skills,” Rarity said, smiling at her. “But how did a young mare like you get to be the personal assistant of such an important po-- er, minotaur? You must be extremely talented to earn such a position!”

“W-well, Miss Rarity,” she began, lowering her head, her voice barely audible, “I come from a family of mechanics as it is. We fix small things like record players, clocks, steamboats, and a few of us even repair trains and printing presses and such. But ever since I saw my first train, I knew there was more to do. So I started reading every book I could on every kind of mechanical device out there. Clocks and trains, sure, but also magical spectrographs and light displays and all kinds of new and old machines. That includes automatons. I even built a miniature one out of watch parts, a battery, and some paperclips and bottle caps. That’s how I got my cutie mark.”

She looked back at her flank, which showed a gear with an electric bolt curving down the center.

“Wow!” Fluttershy exclaimed. “I don’t think I could ever have made anything like that. Machines always seem strange to me. I’m better with animals.”

“Oh, not me,” Gadget said, waving her hoof. “Animals and unfamiliar creatures give me problems. I nearly had a heart attack the first time I saw a griffon. Actually, the first time I even met Mr. Vanderbull, I actually got so scared that I ran away and jumped headfirst into a wooden crate to try and hide!” she laughed, earning an unseen eye roll from Vanderbull and a concealed snicker from Twilight. “Anyway, I’d been designing all kinds of new machines and one day Mr. Vanderbull spotted me at a convention for freelance inventors. He liked my work and hired me that day!”

“Fantastic! But there’s something else that I’d like to ask… though in truth it might be a little insensitive,” Rarity said slowly, trying to ease into the topic.

“What is it?” Gadget asked warmly, feeling more comfortable with her two new companions (partly because she could avoid being directly scrutinized by the curious citizens of Ponyville by hiding between them).

“It’s just that...” Rarity paused, her lips going taut as if she didn't want to ask the question at all. But she sighed and took a breath and finally said, "Most of the pony engineers and watchmakers and such I know of are unicorns since they can easily manipulate the small moving parts in machines with their magic. But you’re an earth pony, darling. How ever do you manage to move all those gears and such into position using just your hooves and mouth?”

And for the first time, Gadget actually looked smug. She took on a knowing smile and a relaxed gaze. “Oh, you’ll see.”

“And then,” Vanderbull added, matching her cryptic smugness, “you’ll see why I just had to hire her.”

***

“Well, here it is!” Twilight said, letting Vanderbull and Gadget into the room, Rarity and Fluttershy right behind them. She led them over to the table where the mechanical pony, stripped and slightly disassembled, was laid there for them all to see.

“My word,” Vanderbull breathed. He adjusted his spectacles as he stepped over to it. “Just look at this! These parts, the composition…”

Gadget only stood in awed silence… for about five seconds. Then she seemingly came to life. “Ohhhhhh OH OH OH OH!!” she squealed as she rushed forward. “Look at all this! Oh my, oh my goodness! These gears! They’re made of carbon steel! And the hull here must be titanium alloy!” To their surprise (and partial disgust), she actually licked it. “It is titanium, Mr. Vanderbull! And… oh, Sweet Celestia, that rechargeable battery must be custom made!” She stuck her face right next to one of the devices they’d removed and actually rubbed her cheek on it. “A magic-electrical conversion Luna’s Ladder! Oh, you don't see this sort of thing every day.”

“Quite right, Gadget!” Vanderbull agreed, his enthusiasm only slightly more restrained than hers. “And look at the wiring that runs throughout it! Whoever did this wasn’t just an engineer; this was the work of an artist!”

“They certainly seem happy, darling,” Rarity said to Twilight, whispering behind her hoof. “I hope our efforts yesterday didn’t go to waste.”

Twilight's eyes went wide. “Oh, yes, thank you for reminding me, Rarity!” Twilight said, going over to her guests. “If you’ll look on the floor next to the table, we’ve managed to label some of the parts for you. My friends and I tried to do some research on classic Equestrian automata. I think we cataloged quite a few parts for being layponies.”

Vanderbull turned and smiled when he saw the labeled parts. “Yes, actually, this will make it much easier, Princess!" He lifted one part and held it up to the light. "Oh, my, some of these are quite rare nowadays. I’ll want to double-check them, of course, but--”

“Augh!”

The high-pitched screech that interrupted him came from Gadget, who was holding up one of the removed plates that had been taken from the leg.

“Who removed this?! These rivets have been totally bent out of shape! They should have been cut evenly if you weren’t going to remove them properly!" She practically slammed the plate back on the table in frustration. "It will take hours to remove them and replace them!” She rolled her eyes in exasperation.

“She acts a little differently around machines,” Fluttershy remarked, scrunching herself inward and wincing at Gadget's outburst.

“Er, sorry, that was my fault,” Twilight said, blushing slightly. “Spike and I were just trying to get the machine open. We didn’t know we were making things more difficult.”

Gadget seemed to remember herself even as Vanderbull folded his arms and looked down at her with hard, narrow eyes. “O-oh, no, I’m sorry, Princess Twilight,” she said, backing away and lowering her head. “I-it was an honest mistake. It’s really not such a big deal at all!”

“Well, if there’s something I can do to make up for it, please let me know,” Twilight said, smiling gently to try and put the girl at ease.

Gadget merely nodded, relieved that Twilight wasn’t more offended.

“And now, my dear,” Vanderbull said, clapping his hands and rubbing them together, “we should probably get to work. We have our supplies, so let’s start by categorizing the rest of the machine and identifying which parts are broken. Then perhaps we can replace or repair whatever is causing the problem.”

“Yes, Commodore,” Gadget said, raising a hoof in salute. Here she turned to Rarity. She raised an eyebrow. “So, you wanted to know how I can work on machinery so precisely as an earth pony, Miss Rarity?”

Rarity stepped forward. “Yes, I’d love to find out!” she said eagerly.

“Then allow me to show you." She leaned forward, her gaze turning stony and serious. "But just so you know, this is probably going to seem a little weird.” At this point, she shook her jacket off her shoulders and pulled the sleeves from her forelegs, letting the bulky coat slide to the ground. And then they all saw what was clanking beneath it.

“Oh… my…” Fluttershy breathed.

Around Gadget’s torso was a strange metallic harness. Thin metal bands wrapped tightly around her chest and there was a flat metallic square on her back. It looked like an iron backpack and it had four open holes, two on each side. Gadget went to one of her bags and removed several items with her hooves and mouth, although Vanderbull came over to assist her. Then everyone saw what they were.

They were a series of four mechanical, segmented limbs, each one with a metallic hand on the end, the fingertips padded in rubber. One by one, Gadget and Vanderbull attached them to the metallic pack she wore. When all four were in place, Gadget pressed a button and the subtle hum of electricity was heard. Then she winced as the harness seemed to tighten and metallic prongs at the end of the bands bit into her flesh.

“Gadget!” Fluttershy cried, rushing to her side. “Are you all right?”

“Yes, it’s fine,” Gadget said, gritting her teeth for a moment. “It stings for a second, but it’s necessary.” She took a deep breath, but then she got a sudden wild gleam in her eyes. “But now you get to see my greatest invention, the thing that Mr. Vanderbull said was the most amazing piece of machinery he’d ever seen at the inventor’s convention!"

Fluttershy stepped back and she, along with Twilight and Rarity stared in open-mouthed awe at the sight before them. She replaced her jacket and let the arms slowly rise into the air, moving fluidly, like the tendrils of a sea anemone or the bodies of serpents.

"As you know," Gadget continued, her voice growing ever louder, "earth ponies have above average strength and endurance as well as heightened sensitivity to natural energies. This device drains some of that magic from my body and redirects it, allowing me to control these.” She gestured at the arms and they all watched as the four limbs rose higher into the air, stretching and flexing impressively for all to see, each one performing a slightly different movement.

“Behold the Point-Dexter!" she shouted triumphantly, her eyes becoming wilder. "Moveable limbs and opposable digits for the modern working earth pony! With these, I can manipulate my environment with the merest thought! Nothing is beyond my reach, and all things are within my grasp! Mwa ha ha ha ha!”

The raised mechanical limbs all began to clap, applauding their “master” as Gadget bowed and blew kisses to some imaginary audience. The others looked on nervously, half expecting a bolt of lightning to appear behind this young mare who had seemingly gone from a painfully shy girl to a cackling mad scientist in the span of only a few minutes.

Vanderbull stepped before her, clearing his throat to get her attention. “Gadget. You’re scaring everypony again,” he hissed.

“Huh? O-oh,” she said, returning to her normal, timid demeanor. The front two hands came forward actually covered her face as she blushed while the back two hands twiddled their thumbs nervously. “Sorry, sir.”

Vanderbull nodded briefly, though she still looked embarrassed.

Sensing this, Fluttershy came over and put her hoof on Gadget's shoulder. “It’s okay,” Fluttershy assured her. Then she glanced at the mechanical limbs. “Though, um, are you sure these things are safe?”

“Oh, yes, of course they’re safe, Miss Fluttershy," Gadget replied. "I can use them just like they’re a part of my body. Since I’m extending my own energy, they might as well be.”

“That’s really amazing!” Twilight said, coming over and poking one of them.

Gadget flinched momentarily. "Um, Your Highness... please don't touch them. Due to sensory feedback, I can feel them."

It was Twilight's turn to blush. "Oh, I'm sorry. But still," she said, looking the limbs over breathlessly, "this is really incredible. I didn’t even know earth pony magic could be utilized that way!”

“Neither did I, at first,” Vanderbull said. “In fact, I believe this device is truly the first of its kind. Innovation like that is just what we need in my line of work. With this one device and the freedom of using all four limbs together, Gadget has been able to create a great deal more than I would have imagined possible.”

“It does leave me a little tired and sometimes I get headaches,” Gadget added, “but it’s worth it.”

“Well, enough showing off,” Vanderbull said, removing his coat and tie and rolling up his sleeves. “We should get started. Let’s see if we can safely remove the leg. There’s something I’d like to look at in closer detail. Gadget, the #12 flathead screwdriver and a pair of needlenose pliers, if you please?”

“Yes sir, Commodore!” she said, saluting with one of the mechanical hands.

"I'm sure my magic would be of help too!" Twilight said, hovering over the automaton with them.

As Twilight joined in, the three began their work on the mechanical pony. Fluttershy and Rarity both looked at each other as the trio got back to work. “Well, I think that’s enough fun for me today,” Rarity commented quietly to Fluttershy.

“Maybe we should just see ourselves out,” Fluttershy replied. “They seem awfully busy now.”

"Exactly what I was thinking." The two of them quietly made their way out the door.

Without another word, Twilight, Gadget, and Mr. Vanderbull began the long and arduous task of fixing the broken automaton. Soon the room filled with the sound of metal on metal and the whirring of Gadget’s strange invention as they began to break the mechanical pony down into its base parts.

***

That night, after a hard day and a lot of progress with the strange machine, Twilight and Spike walked Vanderbull to his room.

“I hope you find this room to your liking, Mr. Vanderbull,” Twilight said, stopping in front of the door. Gadget had already retired to her room (after temporarily freaking out again that she was going to be spending the night in a princess’s castle) and the rest of Vanderbull’s staff had taken his train back to Manehatten once the supplies had been delivered.

“I did my best to get it fixed up for you,” Spike said, opening the door for Vanderbull and gesturing inside. “I tried to make it a little less ‘girly’ too. I saw that awesome train of yours from the castle balcony. I like your style, Mr. Vanderbull!”

Vanderbull chuckled. “Yes, well, I save the pastel colors for the public lines. Pony folk seem to like it, but I prefer the earthier tones. Perhaps it's my native sensibilities.” He turned to Twilight with a broad smile on his face. “Your little friend really is a good assistant. It seems we are both blessed with good help.”

Twilight smiled in return as Spike flushed with pride and puffed out his chest.

“And now," Vanderbull said, "if you’ll excuse me…”

Twilight watched as he turned to the door, about to enter, but then a thought occurred to her.

“Wait!” she cried suddenly, surprising both Vanderbull and Spike. “I… there’s something I wanted to ask you.”

“Yes, of course, Princess, how can I help you?” he asked. He furrowed his brow. "You look worried. Is there something bothering you?"

“It’s… well, you know Princess Celestia too, it seems,” she began cautiously.

Vanderbull nodded. “Yes. We go back a long time. Without her, I’d never have become the minotaur I am today!”

“Yes, well, it’s just that when we first asked her for help with fixing the automaton, she didn’t seem very, uh... receptive.”

Vanderbull seemed to understand and nodded his head slowly. “Ah. Yes. That.”

“It really was strange,” Spike added, scratching his head. “Princess Celestia has always been so supportive of Twilight. I couldn’t believe how she just blew the whole thing off at first!”

Vanderbull cleared his throat, for the first time in his visit looking uncomfortable. “Yes, I suppose I could explain, but, um… please, if we could keep this to ourselves? I’d hate for Her Majesty to think I was gossiping after she sent me this wonderful opportunity.” He looked at her pointedly, making sure she got his meaning.

Twilight smiled and gave a nod. “You have my word. This is between us.”

“Well, then allow me to put it like this: Her Majesty… that is, Princess Celestia, is… old.”

Twilight cocked her head to the side. “Old?”

“I know that’s no sort of secret, but ponies often take it for granted. Because of her eternally youthful looks and magnanimous demeanor, she is seen as never aging. But that is only her body. Her mind is the product of countless moons. Decades upon decades and centuries upon centuries. Now, I am no spring chicken myself,” he said, stroking the tuft of his gray beard for emphasis, “and my wife and I are both old enough to be parents or even grandparents, if we had any children, that is.”

“I didn’t know you were married!” Twilight exclaimed. She smiled at the news. “You met another minotaur here in Equestria?”

He chuckled as he shook his head. “No, actually. She’s a pony, and the very love of my life.” He sighed, his smile becoming warmer and even boyish in contrast to his practiced, polished demeanor. "My dear, sweet Sophia."

“Oh!” Twilight said, somewhat surprised. She decided not to ask if the lack of children was the result of choice or biology.

“I suppose it seems odd to you,” Vanderbull mused, “a minotaur and a pony. About as likely as seeing a dragon attracted to a pony, am I right, Spike my boy?” He broke out into laughter as he playfully punched Spike in the arm.

Spike rubbed his arm and managed to keep his cool despite Vanderbull’s oblivious guffaws, though that was partly because of Twilight putting a comforting hoof on his shoulder. He frowned but kept quiet.

“The point is, I am getting older, and even in my age, I feel like it is difficult at times to understand change and progress. My expertise in technology is among the greatest in the land, yet I find so many others with new ideas that fascinate and confuse me at the same time. That is partly why I have hired Gadget; I needed somepony with fresh ideas and no prejudice and the sheer boldness to try something completely different.

"Still, as I age, I feel as though the modern world is encroaching on the world I once knew. Quite common for us older folks, really. Always complaining about newfangled things. You understand what I am saying?”

Twilight nodded. “I do. But what does that have to do with Celestia?”

Vanderbull laughed out loud. “Don’t you see? It is difficult for me to adjust to the times, and I am merely in my fifties. Celestia is so very much older. And before we had things like trains and the telegraph, change came slowly. But nowadays, technology is changing quite rapidly, and this..." he swallowed, his face growing stonier, "...rather disturbs Her Majesty. She resists it.”

“Wow,” Spike commented. “But then, how come she gets along with you so well?”

“Because I had the foresight to make the technology personal for her. Back when locomotives were first being developed, Her Highness referred to them as… what was it… ah, yes: ‘Loud, smoke-belching monstrosities that will never replace the cart and chariot.’”

Twilight almost laughed out loud. “Celestia said that? I can’t imagine that.”

“Oh?" Vanderbull raised an eyebrow. "Have you ever heard of her traveling by train?”

She froze. Of course, Celestia had traveled all across the country… but no, she couldn’t think of a single instance of her traveling by train in the years she’d known her. It was always by royal chariot, even when it would have been just as convenient and certainly more luxurious to take a private train.

“Nopony could get any funding or allowances for something the Princess herself dismissed,” Vanderbull went on. “Nor would the public ride such a thing. So I came up with an idea.

“At great personal expense to me and my company, we bought up tracts of land and laid down railroad tracks between my home base in Manehatten and Fillydelphia. I was in debt and about to lose it all with everything I had put into locomotives, but I went ahead with a gambit. Her Highness was attending a function in Fillydelphia one day, so I arranged for the famous Manehatten Barndoor and Brumby Brothers’ Circus to load their troupe - complete with animals, clowns, magicians, and acrobats - onto a train of custom-made cars and pay a surprise visit to the town. It was well-known that Celestia was quite a fan of the circus for some reason, and when the whole town of Fillydelphia went abuzz at the sight of the performers disembarking from my train, Her Highness was right there to see them arrive and set up for a one-day-only show.”

He smiled at the memory. "She laughed and clapped like a filly at the sight of the animals on parade and the daring performances. And she came up to me personally and thanked me for arranging such a gift. I felt like the most fortunate and honored being in the world that day."

“That’s amazing!” Spike exclaimed.

“And I take it that worked?” Twilight asked, raising an eyebrow knowingly.

“Indeed it did. She gave her approval and reversed her opinion regarding the technology, especially with regard to me: the ‘Minotaur who Joined Two Cities,’ as the newspapers called me.” He puffed his chest out with pride. “With the Princess now backing trains, the railroad industry took off and investors were practically fighting each other to buy a share in my company. And now the railroad joins every metropolis and one-horse town across Equestria. Though she still personally eschews trains, she warmed up to me and welcomed me into the Canterlot elite. And that is how we became friends.”

Twilight smiled. “Thank you for the wonderful story, Mr. Vanderbull,” Twilight said, giving a short bow. “Well, good night. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Ah, just a moment please,” Vanderbull said, raising a hand to stop her. “I hate to keep you any further, but since we’re discussing it, this might be a good time to mention..." He hesitated, but then pressed on. "I should mention that Celestia still mistrusts any new technology until it is proven. And I happen to know that she finds the very idea of a mechanical pony offensive. She is largely the reason the technology never went beyond a novelty a century ago. From what I understand, the thought of replacing a flesh-and-blood pony with a machine is something she fears more than almost anything else. Her Highness is a truly caring ruler and, bless her heart, she cares greatly for the common pony. Thus, she is interested in us fixing this automaton only to see if there’s some threat to you or the kingdom. If there isn’t, she might very well demand we destroy the machine the instant we learn its origin and purpose.”

Twilight took a step back, her eyes bulging in horror. “Sh-she wouldn’t do that! This could be the most incredible invention ever built in Equestrian history! There’s so much potential for something like this!”

Vanderbull nodded solemnly. "That is correct, but I believe that may not be enough to rescue it, should Princess Celestia decide to destroy it. I could be wrong, but in case I’m not,” Vanderbull said, pushing his spectacles up his long snout to look at her intently, “you might want to come up with some reason to keep studying it once we get it working that will satisfy her. If it were anything else, I wouldn’t bother, but technology is her one sore spot. I, for one, believe that technology like the machine downstairs will build this nation’s future, and it is up to us to see that the future comes soon, or it may not come at all.”

Twilight nodded. “I see. Well, I’d like to think you’re wrong, but I’ll think about it anyway." She managed a final smile. "Good night, Mr. Vanderbull.”

Vanderbull smiled, almost yawning as he entered his quarters. “Good night, Princess Twilight.”

Spike and Twilight were quiet as they made their way down the hallway. It was a full minute and back in Twilight’s bedroom before Spike broke the silence.

“So, what are you gonna do, Twilight?” he asked uneasily.

“I… I don’t know yet, Spike,” she replied. “But I’ll come up with something.” Her face grew stern, her eyes narrowing at the thought of taking a stand against her mentor. “I hate to upset Princess Celestia, but no matter what, I’m not going to let the scientific discovery of the century slip out of my hooves.”

To be continued...

The Machine Awakes

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Twilight got up, moaning contentedly and stretching after a restful night’s sleep. What Vanderbull had told her had weighed on her mind, but she felt refreshed nonetheless. She woke up to find Spike had made her a cup of tea and left it on a tray on her nightstand. She smiled as she made a mental note to thank him later. She made her way to the castle balcony, levitating the cup of tea with her. There she stood by the railing and looked out at Ponyville as it was bathed in the gentle golden glow of the dawn. She took a breath of the cool, fresh morning air. Giving a satisfied sigh, she took a sip of her tea.

“GOOD MORNING PRINCESS TWILIGHT!” Gadget said, bursting into full view suddenly.

“Gah!” Twilight screamed, nearly dropping her tea. “Gadget? What are you--”

“I thought you might want somepony to wash the windows so I decided to help as a way of saying thank you for letting me stay here and everything so I hope you like it!” she said, talking just a little bit too loudly.

“I… wait, windows?”

“I did it with these!” Gadget was again wearing the harness with the mechanical arms and Twilight could see that three of the hands had a cloth in them while the last one contained a spray bottle with window cleaner.

Twilight smiled, but raised her hoof. “That’s nice, Gadget, really, but…"

She stopped finally noticing that Gadget was actually standing just beyond the railing, and they were several stories up. "Wait, what are you standing on?!" She rushed over, wondering what sorcery was keeping her from falling.

“Oh, that," Gadget replied nonchalantly. "I brought out another one of my inventions to help me reach the windows. See?”

Twilight looked over the rail and saw that Gadget was standing on what looked like stilts, only these had a strange, accordion-like mechanism to them.

“My extendable platform boots! I just move my hooves a little, see, and…” Gadget bent her knees slightly to shift her weight and all four of the stilts lowered her simultaneously. Just for good measure, she raised and lowered them several times, elevating herself and coming back down like a yo-yo, the boots making a click-clack sound as they telescoped up and down.

“Ta-da!" Gadget said, waving her mechanical hands theatrically. "You know, I should really sell this to window-cleaners. Although I need to make an anchoring mechanism. One stiff breeze and these could topple--”

Apparently this was tempting the Fates, because a strong breeze did come by and Gadget started to tip over, losing her balance. In her moment of fear and panic, even her mechanical limbs began to flail wildly, dropping her bottle and cleaning rags.

“Whoa!” Twilight shouted, activating her magic in an instant. The magenta glow of the magic enveloped the young mare, momentarily holding her and then pushing her back into place.

“Ahahaha… th-thanks, Princess." She was panting and shaking. "Wow... I could have just died there. Guess I owe you even more now, huh?” She lowered her head, hiding her face behind her mane as she looked away. Her mechanical limbs, Twilight noticed, also worked in reflection of her mood, as she again hid her face behind one set of hands.

But Twilight just smiled. “It’s okay. Besides, you and Mr. Vanderbull are the ones helping me remember? Now, I’m glad you helped clean my windows, and that was very sweet of you, but why don’t you come back inside? Spike’s making waffles!" She rested her forelegs on the railing to look at her slyly. "And since you’re from Vanhoover, I’m sure you’ll be glad to know we have real maple syrup.”

She raised her head instantly and her eyes lit up. “I’ll be right down!” she exclaimed as she descended back to the ground below.

***

Hours later, Twilight was on her own working on a single piece of the automaton. The strange bulbs on the thing, she’d found, could absorb magic and turn it into an electric charge. There was something familiar about that, though she couldn’t quite place where she’d last seen it. She’d been practicing casting magic on it and then running it through a multimeter to see how much voltage, current, and resistance went through it.

She was happy to make a contribution, especially in light of how masterful Vanderbull and Gadget were. Her own specialty of magic-related technology was still proving useful. Several more pieces of machinery were on a table alongside some reference books. The headway she was making should speed up repairs if the other two were having as much success as she was.

“Excuse me, Princess Twilight?” Vanderbull asked as he peeked through the door.

“Oh, good, Mr. Vanderbull!” she exclaimed, picking up the device she'd been working with. “I have the measurements from this… thing. You see, I can cast magic on it and it converts it into an electric charge. It loses a little bit in the process and I’ve seen some technology like this before, but wow! This is really efficient! Who could have designed this?”

He bent down, adjusting his spectacles as he looked at it. “Hm. I’m afraid I’m no closer to discovering that either,” Vanderbull said. Then he stood up straight and grinned. “However, Gadget and I have something to show you. I think you will find it just as impressive as we do.”

Twilight's curiosity was piqued and she nodded eagerly. “Ooh, that sounds interesting! Let me bring these other devices and my data and head back to the main room.”

Shortly thereafter, she entered the room where the automaton had once been in one piece. Now it was completely disassembled. The legs, barrel, and even the head were all in separate pieces, though labelled and kept in distinct groups to keep them organized. But on the center table were three distinct groups of machinery and they were all hooked up to a large chemical battery.

"Is this what you wanted to show me?" Twilight asked, pointing to the objects on the table.

“Your Highness!” Gadget exclaimed. She was using her mechanical limbs to hoist a heavy-looking crate of gears and cogs and move it to the side of the room. “You are not going to believe this!” She jumped into the air, practically dancing with excitement.

“Easy now, Gadget,” Vanderbull said, holding out his hands in a calming motion. “Please operate the switching mechanism and control the subsystems as we practiced. I will take the liberty of explaining our find to Her Highness.”

Gadget saluted (again with her mechanical hand, not with her hoof, Twilight noted), and went to the other end of the table, pulling out a small console with a few switches on it. They were wired to a round, black triangular thing in the middle of the table. It, in turn, was connected to the three surrounding clusters of machinery.

“Princess,” Vanderbull began, “you will recall that the machine you found was in the shape of an earth pony?”

“Yes, it was. I mean, it is.” She hesitated, seeing Vanderbull smile slightly. “Isn’t it?”

“Oh, indeed. But look at this here,” he said pointing to the first group of machinery. “This is the automaton’s leg, now opened so we can see its workings.”

Twilight looked at it. She could see the gears and ball bearings that made up the knee, but the leg mostly just seemed to be a couple of poles inside a skeletal frame. However…

“Are those… pistons on the side of the main leg?” she asked, leaning in closer.

“Yes, very observant, Princess!” Vanderbull replied. “But watch this. Gadget, Stomp Test A, please.”

“Yes, Commodore!” she said, pulling a switch. There was a hum of electricity and the leg twitched slightly. "Power has been routed to the leg!"

“Now, this is a chunk of granite I purchased from the local quarry,” Vanderbull said, holding up a sizable rock, grunting at its weight. “Quite strong, actually. Now, if I place it on the ground and hold the leg over it like so,” he continued, hefting the leg into position at the edge of the table and holding it in place, “then watch what happens. Gadget?”

“Stomp Test A in 3… 2… 1…” She pulled a lever and the mechanical leg stomped downward onto the rock with its brass hoof.

The rock was totally unscathed.

“Well…” Twilight said. “That’s… what was it supposed to do?” She cocked her head to the side, raising an eyebrow.

“Nothing, actually,” Vanderbull said. Then he held up a finger before Twilight could ask further questions. “You'll understand in a moment, Your Highness, after we engage the subsystem. Gadget?”

His young assistant pressed a button and sparks of electricity flew from the black triangular device. A green light on the corner connected to the leg blinked on, and then Twilight jumped at the sudden metallic clank and the slow hiss of steam that came from the leg.

“What was that?” she asked.

“The pistons engaged!” Gadget exclaimed. Then she covered her mouth. “Oh, sorry, Mr. Vanderbull, I…”

“Oh, it’s fine, Gadget,” Vanderbull said with smile as he waved a hand. “I understand your enthusiasm. But first, Test B.” He again held the leg in place.

“Right! Stomp Test B in 3… 2… 1!”

She pulled the lever a second time and again the leg stomped on the rock. But this time the rock shattered into tiny pieces that flew all over, scattering the room with gravel and dust as the recoil forced Vanderbull backward. They all coughed at the sudden cloud of dust.

“Oops,” Gadget said, looking down. “I think I used too much force.”

“Not a problem, we’ll just be sure to clean the supplies and parts after this,” Vanderbull said, brushing the dust from his sleeves. “Now, then, Princess, what you saw in the first test was the leg working in a low-power neutral state. But we have found that the automaton has three distinct subsystems that it can utilize for extra abilities.”

Gadget couldn’t contain herself any longer. “It can imitate all three types of ponies!” she cried, leaping up on to her hind legs. “And that was its ‘earth pony’ mode!”

Vanderbull rolled his eyes, but he was obviously excited about the discovery as well. “That is correct," he said. "By engaging what we call ‘E-Mode,’ it can drastically increase the power in its legs as well as augment the body’s sturdiness and pulling power. Not only that, it even activates sensors in the hooves that allow it to detect earth energies. Thus it can simulate earth pony strength and possibly the similar abilities that allow them to tend and grow plants.”

Twilight was listening intently, but then turned to the other machines on the table. “Wait a minute. If what you’re saying is right, then these other two things can let it simulate pegasi and unicorns?!”

“Exactly,” Vanderbull said. He went around to a strange, trapezoidal box. “We found this hidden in a compartment in the automaton’s back.” It was silver and had two slots, one on each side. “Gadget, engage P-Mode.”

She pressed a button and the green light went out, followed by a blue light on another corner turning on. The trapezoidal box in turn began to hum and then there was a loud rattling from inside it. A moment later, a pair of bright, brass-colored wings shot out from the sides, then raised into a ‘V’ shape. They were skeletal, still totally metallic, but a series of what looked like brass feathers ran down their length.

“It has wings? With feathers?” Twilight asked. She cocked her head. “How? Why? Is it supposed to flap with those things?”

“Actually, no,” Vanderbull replied. He pointed at the 'feathers' and said “These are not really feathers, though they were obviously meant to mimic their shape. Instead, they are miniature jets. They fire streams of air to provide the machine with lift.”

“Jets? You mean they can propel the machine using nothing but air?!” Twilight was becoming more and more impressed by the second. Primitive jets were an old invention that had been around for a while and rockets on fireworks were a kind of jet, and she’d studied enough science to know that some ponies believed they might one day be used for transportation. Still, something like this…

“Observe, please,” Vanderbull said, motioning for Twilight to step back. “This will get a bit noisy. Gadget, if you please?”

“Roger, Commodore!” She pressed a few more buttons and a low wheezing came from the device. Then it slowly built to a high-pitched whine, then grew to a full-blown roar. Slowly, the trapezoidal box, held up by the wings, floated into the air and began hovering, tethered down with ropes and its own wires. Twilight could see the slight distortion coming from the hot air blowing from the tips of the feather-shaped jets. It hovered there for a good minute, wobbling slightly and whipping up a powerful wind around the room and blowing their manes all over.

Finally, Vanderbull gave the signal to cut the engine and Gadget reduced the power, letting it slowly return to the table before cutting the power entirely. The wings folded up and retracted back into the box like snakes returning to their burrow.

“That’s amazing!” Twilight exclaimed, still shouting. She rubbed her ears when Gadget and Vanderbull winced. “Oh, sorry, my ears are still ringing!”

“Quite all right.” Vanderbull was rubbing his own ears.

“Well, at least all that wind probably cleared away the dust from the last test off the equipment,” Gadget commented with a shrug of her shoulders.

“I suppose that’s something,” Vanderbull sighed, rolling his eyes. “Now, onto the last mode. We won’t actually test it because honestly we don’t know how to make it work correctly.” He motioned to the third subsystem. The last wire from the triangular device led to a tray filled with six different glass jars, each one sealed with a glass lid that had been made airtight with a translucent substance. A wire ran into each one through the lids and then out the bottom of the tray before mingling back into a braid of wires that eventually terminated in some strange conical metal shape.

“This is… what, the unicorn mode? ‘U-Mode,’ I guess?”

“Yes,” Vanderbull replied. “You see, we discovered that the machine runs an electrical current through these jars and carries an electrochemical signal to this small cone. It was found in the head, just under a hidden panel in the forehead. It can telescopically extend outward when activated.” He picked it up and extended it manually, pulling it out with his fingers and showing her its true shape.

“Oh my gosh," Twilight said, her eyes lighting up. "It’s a horn!”

“Well, the mechanical equivalent of a unicorn horn, yes.” Vanderbull tapped it, letting her hear it ring. It was definitely metallic, but it had a strange reverberating quality to it.

“May I see that?” she asked.

“Of course,” he said, holding it out. She levitated the bright, golden object over to herself and looked at it carefully, noting the strange colors of it as it shined in the light. She gasped. “This horn is made of an orichalcum alloy! Orichalcum is a highly conductive element for channeling magic energy, but it’s also rare and expensive! Whoever made this must have been very rich to get so much of it!”

Gadget coughed, getting Twilight’s attention. “Please check the jars as well, Princess Twilight,” she said. She gently pushed the jars over to her. “We think we know what they are, but we need you to confirm our theory.”

Twilight looked to the tray of jars curiously. Each jar contained a different color liquid. They were sealed shut and secured to the tray. The glass of the jars also had a strange green tint to it. “Magically reinforced glass. They’d be very hard to break. The liquid inside is…” She levitated the tray and moved it from side to side. The liquid inside barely moved. “It looks like it’s not really liquid. It's more like a hardened, high-viscosity gel. But if it’s connected to the horn… then it must be part of something that can produce magic artificially!” She paused and narrowed her eyes as she looked at them closely. She placed a hoof to her chin.

“Is something wrong, Princess?” Vanderbull asked.

Twilight didn’t respond at first, but suddenly cast a spell, firing a beam of magic at the jars, startling both of her guests. The jars each lit up and glowed brightly in sequence before dimming again.

“Just as I thought,” Twilight said. “It’s thaumatrium gel. Concentrated mana.”

Vanderbull tilted his head. He looked to Gadget who only seemed slightly less confused.

“Mana,” Gadget murmured. “That basically what magic is made of, right?”

Twilight smiled, glad to be in more familiar territory. “Yes, that’s pretty close. Mana is the ethereal energy that ponies use to cast magic. It’s everywhere and any living thing can create it, but each pony has an individual manafont. It’s like a storehouse of energy. You can run out if you cast too much, but you can also increase its potential with practice. Usually mana is inert, and just sort of hanging around. But you can capture and collect it as solid matter with some chemicals and practice and a lot of time. We call that solid matter ‘thaumatrium.’”

Vanderbull nodded, listening intently. “So, the automaton uses this material as a kind of magical fuel?”

“Exactly. What I’m thinking is that these jars of thaumatrium gel are meant to substitute for the automaton’s manafont, since it’s not an organic being. That’s how it could cast magic, at least theoretically.” Twilight considered this and peered at the jars very closely. “This much gel would last a long time, but I’m not sure how powerful it could be. Most unicorns can do a lot of ordinary magic, levitate some light objects, not to mention a few other things like light manipulation…"

Then her eyes went wide and she stood up straight. "Wait: if the automaton has all three types of pony abilities, wouldn’t it be like an alicorn?”

Vanderbull shook his head. “No, Princess.” He pointed at the triangular object again. “And it’s because of this device. We’re calling it the Mode Switch because it seems to regulate and prevent the activation of more than one mode at a time. The automaton could fly or cast magic or break through a brick wall, but not all three at the same time.”

“If it could imitate an alicorn,” Gadget added, “that would make it an overpowered OC.”

Twilight raised an eyebrow. “OC?”

“Operational Construct.”

“Ah, I see. So, overpowering it would be bad?”

“Very bad.” Gadget shut the entire system down, the electric hum fading. “Here, put your hoof over the Switch. Er, if you don’t mind, Your Highness?” She winced, realizing she’d just been ordering around royalty.

“It’s all right, Gadget,” Twilight laughed. She did as Gadget asked and felt a strong heat coming from the Switch even when her hoof was half a meter away. “Whoa. That really warmed up fast.”

“We believe that the Mode Switch was added late into the construction,” Vanderbull said. “The subsystems already consume a lot of energy and thus produce a lot of heat. That heat could damage the machinery, and having all three subsystems activate at once would wreak havoc on the entire thing. It would run itself down in a matter of minutes.”

Twilight considered this. “It’s a good thing the designer came up with something to prevent that but still use different abilities, I suppose.”

“It also explains the mane,” Gadget quipped as she sifted through some of the other parts lying around the room, holding up one to examine it.

“Huh?” Twilight asked. “The mane? Why, what is it? I thought it was just for decoration.”

“Oh, no no no, Princess Twilight, it’s so much more than that!” she cried excitedly. She set down the part she held and went to another box labelled “MANE” and removed it, holding it out gently with all four hands.

Now removed from the automaton, Twilight saw it actually ran from the head, down the length of the body, and continued outward to the tail in one long continuous strand of hollow, conical coils. “Wait, so, it’s the mane and the tail?”

“Yes! And it’s made of some light, flexible polymer that Mr. Vanderbull and I can’t even identify! It's very soft too, almost like some sort of fabric. But see, the strands run along all the main systems in the torso here in the middle. The battery, the, um manafont tray I guess, the wings, and so on. The mane and tail act as a heat sink! They pick up heat and draw it away from the systems and outside, dissipating the heat in the cooler outside air in front or back of the body. Form and function together! It’s really quite brilliant!”

“Yes,” Vanderbull said, almost begrudgingly, as he folded his arms. “I’m a little jealous of the mind that built this magnificent mechanical mare. This incorporates so much advanced technology. This isn’t merely more advanced than the old automatons; it is a new machine entirely!” He sighed, but then grew calmer as he recomposed himself. “Still, we think we have everything we need. We have fixed the parts that were broken and identified all the others and learned their functions, even if we don’t understand how those functions operate. Your Highness, with your permission, Gadget and I will begin reconstructing it. We should have it ready to activate by early evening.”

“By this evening? So soon?!” Twilight exclaimed.

“Unless you don’t wish to,” Vanderbull said. “I honestly would understand if you hesitated. This machine is so much more sophisticated than I even thought possible. It could, in fact, be dangerous. And we still have no idea why it journeyed to Ponyville or why it was seeking you out.”

“But if we don’t activate it,” Gadget interjected, eyes going wide, “we’ll never get to see all the awesome stuff it can do! I even got an anemometer to test its wing power and--”

“Gadget!” Vanderbull snapped, silencing his over-eager protégée. “While it is true that there is much we can learn by activating it, Princess Twilight Sparkle knows this and we will abide by her decision.” He leaned closer to her, looking down at her sternly.

“Y-yes, sir,” she replied, bowing her head.

Twilight considered the matter. If we activate it, it could be dangerous. But if we don’t, we might never know why it was built in the first place! What should I do?

She mulled it over, rubbing her chin, and finally made a decision: she was a princess now, but she had always been a student and seeker of knowledge since the day she was born. To shy away from learning more about this machine just wasn’t her way of doing things.

“Okay, we’ll activate it,” she said. She then smiled as Gadget reared up, kicking her legs happily, the mechanical limbs on her back giving triumphant fist pumps as well. “But I want to bring my friends here. Not just because I want to share the discovery with them, but also for extra protection. If something goes wrong, we need to be ready to stop it.”

Vanderbull also smiled, clearly pleased and likewise eager to learn more. “We’ll get right on it, Your Highness.” He also took a note from his pocket and handed it to her. “This is a short list of the other systems we found and what they do. This may be of help to you in the future.”

Twilight nodded and left to begin gathering her friends. She was practically bristling with excitement and broke into a trot as she made her way to the front door.

How wonderful! Tonight! she thought. I’m going to get to see a working independent automaton tonight!

***

The small room was growing crowded, Twilight noticed, now that everypony had gathered. It was in the early evening and the light from the sunset was still shining through the nearby window into the room where the newly reassembled automaton was laid on the table. The machine looked like some broken thing or an assortment of parts and bric-a-brac. It was now like some sleeping creature, something that could be awoken with the slightest word. It had been placed prone on the table, its hooves at rest, its head down.

“Does this thing really move?” Rainbow Dash asked, prodding the silent automaton. She narrowed her eyes, looking it up and down. “It doesn’t look like it would.” She tapped it with her hoof once, then again a bit harder, knocking on its head to produce a loud clanging.

“Ah, Miss Rainbow Dash, please!” Gadget cried as she rushed over. “You might damage it!”

“What? How?!” Rainbow asked, gesturing to it. “I thought you guys said this thing was so tough that it could break through a brick wall if it needed to!”

“W-well, that’s true, but--”

“Oh, Rainbow Dash, just leave it alone for her sake until we know what it can do.” Twilight rolled her eyes and Rainbow Dash backed off, shrugging as she took back to the air and hovered nearby Applejack. Twilight herself was now wearing her crown and had her other five friends gathered in a semicircle around the room. In addition, the Mayor had arrived with her aide and there were a few reporters from the local newspaper. Vanderbull was back in his waistcoat and jacket, looking patient and dignified. Gadget was no longer wearing the Point Dexter and was back in her oversized coat. Rarity, by contrast, was dressed up as if attending an opera, her elegant magenta gown rustling just loud enough to be heard over the light conversation.

“Rarity, you look amazing!” Spike was practically floating at the sight of her in the elegant dress. “But then you always look amazing.”

“Oh, aren’t you sweet, Spikey Wikey!” she said, beaming at him. She turned her attention to Gadget and frowned when she saw her in her simple jacket. “Ah, but Gadget, I do wish you’d taken me up on my offer to take you to the stylist and see about taking some of your mane out of your eyes and maybe a simple dress for the occasion.”

Gadget gulped and eyed the reporters, her eyes darting from one to another and focusing especially on the photographer. “Th-that was very kind of you, but there wasn’t time with the repairs, and I, um, didn’t know Princess Twilight was going to bring the press. I hope they aren’t going to take too many pictures.”

“I know what you mean,” Fluttershy said. “I really don’t want everypony talking about how I look in the paper tomorrow.” The two of them huddled together, shrinking into themselves and putting Rarity between themselves and the newsponies.

Pinkie Pie, on the other hand, was bubbling with her usual energy, bouncing up and down in place. “Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, we should have made this an ‘Automaton Activation Party!’ In fact, isn’t that like a birthday for a machine? We should have had cake! At least I brought my party cannon!” She brought it out (seemingly from nowhere, as usual) and patted it with her hoof for emphasis.

“Honestly, I don’t think it’s quite the same thing as a birthday, Pinkie,” Applejack said. She was eyeing the automaton even more suspiciously than before, narrowing her gaze and putting on a sour-looking frown. “It ain’t like that thing’s even alive. And who knows what’ll happen when it turns on!” She turned to Twilight at that. “Ya sure we even wanna try? I still say we shoulda brought more protection.”

“I doubt we’ll need it,” Twilight assured her. “But just the same, we should be prepared. You and Rainbow Dash brought some things," she gestured to the large wrench Dash had set aside as well as the sack of horseshoes Applejack brought, "Mr. Vanderbull said he has an emergency shutdown plan," she looked to Vanderbull, who had readied some strange device with a large magnet on the end, "and if we really need to, we can use our Rainbow Power to stop it! We should be just fine.”

Applejack was only slightly comforted by this. “I guess,” she muttered.

The Mayor walked over to the pair of them. “Is everything all right, Princess Twilight?” she asked, her expression calm, but her eyes giving away her apprehension. She leaned forward and her tone was slightly strained although her smile stayed in place. “I was told this could be an impressive and historic night for Ponyville. The reporters are expecting this to go smoothly as well, and they will be documenting the whole event.”

Twilight understood that the Mayor’s concern was not just everypony’s safety, but also the image this would project for the town.

“Don’t worry, Your Honor,” Twilight said. For emphasis, she placed her hoof on her chest as if taking a vow. “I guarantee that this will be something brand new and maybe even become the talk of all Equestria!”

The Mayor’s eyes sparkled and she smiled. She kept that smile as she turned her head slightly, allowing the photographer to take a perfect snapshot of her standing next to Twilight.

Vanderbull coughed to get everypony’s attention. “Ah, Your Highness, Your Honor? I believe we are ready to begin.”

“Oh, yes, of course,” Twilight said. “Miss Mayor, would you like to begin?”

“Yes, thank you, Princess Twilight!” She stepped before the automaton, looking to her aide, who was nodding with approval or shaking her head to give feedback with each thing she did. Currently she was nodding, so the Mayor smiled and addressed those gathered. “Ahem. Fillies and gentlecolts!" she began, sweeping her arm out dramatically. "Our most esteemed Princess Twilight Sparkle has brought a strange new scientific discovery to our attention. Tonight, we may find out the strange origin and the true nature of this mysterious... Iron Horse!” The reporters scribbled this down and she smiled, satisfied that she’d struck the right chord. “And now, Her Highness will explain more about tonight’s proceedings.”

“Thank you, Miss Mayor,” Twilight said, stepping forward and levitating a lengthy speech in front of her. “My friends, Miss Mayor, and members of the scientific and journalistic community. It is my great pleasure to unveil the great achievement of Mr. Cornelius Vanderbull--”

Vanderbull puffed his chest out, smiling calmly as several camera flashes captured his image.

“--and Miss Gadgette F. Giroux--”

“Eep!” the young mare cried, diving back behind Rarity as the photographers tried to photograph her.

“Er, as I was saying, with their efforts and the help of my friends, we have managed to put this broken automaton back together. Unlike automata of the past, this machine can reportedly operate totally independently, may be capable of speech, and has a variety of amazing abilities, which I look forward to exploring. You may be curious to know the history of modern automata, which begins with the revolutionary creations of inventor and clockmaker Henriette Marellardet...”

“Just turn it on for pony’s sake!” Rainbow Dash exploded, launching herself into the air.

“Rainbow Dash!” Twilight cried, scowling at her. “I’m trying to give some historical background so everypony can appreciate this event!”

“Yeah, well, you’re putting Pinkie Pie to sleep,” she said, rolling her eyes as she hovered.

They all looked and saw Pinkie was, in fact, asleep, leaning on a very annoyed Applejack.

“Psst, Pinkie!” Applejack hissed, rousing the sleeping pink pony.

“And she’s not the only one who’s bored. Heck, one of the reporters is drawing stick figures on his notepad.” She turned and smirked at one of the reporters, who sheepishly put the notepad in his pocket. “Yeah, that’s right, I noticed."

“Oh fine!” Twilight groaned. With a sigh, she turned to Vanderbull. “Mr. Vanderbull, can we begin?”

“Yes, Princess. Allow me,” Vanderbull said. He went to the automaton and gently lifted a tiny panel on the thing’s back. “There is a button here. My assistant and I have already charged its battery, which should hold a charge for 24 to 48 hours depending on activity. I merely need to press this button to activate it.” He cleared his throat. “In the name of Her Highness, Princess Twilight Sparkle, the town of Ponyville, and our great nation of Equestria, I do hereby activate this machine!” He pressed the button and stepped back as an electric hum was heard growing from inside the automaton.

“Ya ready, Rainbow Dash?” Applejack whispered.

“Ready, AJ,” Dash whispered back. Applejack pulled a few steel horseshoes out of her pack and held them in one hoof, ready to toss or buck them at the automaton if it made any false moves. Rainbow Dash held up her large wrench and hefted the weighty thing like a baseball bat. Vanderbull, for his own part, was holding up his device.

“Should it be necessary,” he said to the nervous-looking press and everypony else gathered, “this device will emit an electronic pulse that will scramble and disable the automaton's systems... as a last resort.”

The automaton continued to hum for a few more moments, but did not move. Various other noises from inside it were heard as systems switched on one-by-one. Clangs and hisses and the slow whir of clockwork formed a tiny symphony as the inner workings came to life individually. And then, surprising them all, the eyes suddenly came on, going from completely black to a bright, vibrant purple.

“Booting main systems,” it intoned electronically. It rose to its hooves, re-positioning itself as it stood on the table. The sound of brass hooves hitting the crystalline table rang out and everyone stared at it, eyes wide and mouths hanging open.

The machine was covered in metallic plates that were welded or bolted together. The hooves were of brass, and flexible rubber at its knees and midsection allowed it to move smoothly. The polymer coils that made up the mane and tail swayed slightly as it stood. Its ears were connected with hinges and they squeaked slightly as they moved and twitched, seemingly to take in the sounds of the room. It had no mouth to speak of, but its electronic voice came from a speaker behind a series of thin, vertical openings in the rounded lower jaw where the mouth would have been. It even had a slight nose, although it clearly didn’t need to breathe and nopony was sure if it could even smell.

Lastly, there were the eyes. Twilight knew they’d been crafted out of some magic-enhanced amethyst lenses, which explained the purple color. It stared outwards with those eyes; without eyelids it was incapable of blinking, and the effect of that glowing stare was mesmerizing to some of those gathered and unnerving to the others.

“Amazing,” the Mayor breathed, never taking her eyes off it.

“By Celestia, what a story this will make!” a reporter said. “Get a picture, get a picture!” he said to his photographer, elbowing him.

The automaton paid no heed, but continued speaking in its artificial but distinctly feminine voice. “System has recovered from failure. Mechanical function restored to 100% capability. Lower cognitive function at 100%. Now loading memory and higher function. 20 percent… 40 percent… 75 percent…” The thing’s eyes narrowed, then returned to their full size. “Error. Damage to memory detected. Unable to recover. Restoring to system defaults. Continuing boot-up sequence. Higher cognitive function restored.”

Rarity leaned over to Gadget who had stepped out from behind her to stare at the mechanical pony. “Um, is it just going to talk to itself all night?” she asked nervously.

“Huh?” Gadget asked, barely hearing Rarity. She had stepped out, no longer concerned with being seen or photographed. Instead, she was awestruck, her eyes wide as the others', but she was also trembling and her mouth was brought up into a joyous smile. “Oh, uh... no, I don’t think so. It’s just reporting its status as it turns itself on.” She turned back to the sight in front of her. "Wow," she whispered, and Rarity noticed she even had the hint of tears in her eyes. "This is... it's incredible."

“Sure is taking its sweet time,” Rainbow Dash said, crossing her forelegs and rolling her eyes.

The automaton raised its head slightly. “Unit 003M is now online. Scanning environment.” It turned its head slowly, taking in its surroundings, getting a good look at all of them.

Without warning, it jumped back, lowering its head and arching its back, eyes going from purple to a very menacing red. “Potential threats detected. Activating emergency self defense measures. E-mode activated.”

Breaking out of her stupor, Gadget yelled “Everypony stand back! It’s turning on its earth pony mode to boost its strength before it attacks!” The reporters and the others backed away as Applejack and Rainbow Dash rushed forward.

“I knew it was up to no good!” Applejack shouted, preparing to start throwing horseshoes. Rainbow Dash took up her wrench while Vanderbull readied the electromagnetic device.

“NO!” Twilight shouted, putting herself between the automaton and the others. She held her forelegs and wings wide, forming a barrier to block any attack.

“Twilight, be careful!” Fluttershy cried as she recoiled, reaching out with one hoof. Spike made to run over to her, but Twilight held up a hoof, making it clear he was not to move.

“It’s okay, everypony, it’s okay!” Twilight exclaimed. She looked over her shoulder. The machine was still in its defensive posture, but hadn’t moved any further. She looked back to her friends. “Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Mr. Vanderbull, please put down your weapons!”

“Are you outta yer mind, Twilight?!” Applejack shouted. She swept a foreleg at her. “Get away from that thing!”

“Yeah, Twilight, you could get hurt!” Rainbow Dash was still holding the wrench, her eyes rapidly going from Twilight to the monstrosity behind her as she tried to find an opening.

“No, listen!” Twilight shot back, growing more confident. “It scanned the environment and it thinks it’s in danger! It’s only trying to protect itself! Just put those things down!”

The others looked to each other. “Are you sure about this, Twilight?” Rainbow asked slowly. “That thing doesn’t look too friendly!”

“I… yes, I’m sure,” she replied, though she kept looking over her shoulder. "If it was trying to hurt us, then it would have already attacked. Please, just put your weapons down!"

Applejack, Rainbow Dash, and Vanderbull all shared a glance, then slowly each one set their weapons down on the floor and backed away.

Twilight looked back at the automaton, but it didn’t budge and still looked like it was ready to attack. Scanning the room again, she tried to think to herself, Okay, if I had just woken up and was surrounded by strange ponies, what would I find threatening? Then she saw.

“Pinkie!” she shouted. “The party cannon! Turn it the other way!”

“Huh? Aww,” Pinkie said, though she complied.

Satisfied, Twilight turned back to the machine.

“Oh, be careful, Twilight!” Rarity cried, raising her hooves to her face.

“It’s okay, it’s okay,” Twilight said quietly, still holding out a hoof behind her to make sure they all stayed in place. At first, everypony thought she was still talking to them. Then they realized she was talking to the automaton. “It's okay. See? Nopony is armed." She smiled and backed away, holding out a hoof as she gestured to the others. "We don’t want to harm you. Please stand down. You're safe.”

The machine looked around the room a second time, then stood back to its normal position, its eyes returning to their purple color. “Confirmed. Scans reveal no threats. Emergency self-defence deactivated. Cancelling E-Mode. Resuming normal operation.”

Everypony breathed a sigh of relief.

“Well, Princess,” Vanderbull said, gingerly stepping forward, “it appears that we can talk to it now, if you wish.”

Twilight nodded to him, then turned back to the machine. “Um, excuse me… hello?”

The automaton looked to her, staring straight at her. “No end user has been specified. Do you wish to register as my end user?”

Twilight was taken aback. “I… huh?”

“Princess, it’s asking if you’re its master! Er, mistress!” Gadget exclaimed, practically bouncing on her hooves.

“M-master?” Twilight asked, looking back at her.

“If you do, it will follow your orders. And answer any questions you have.” She looked at her with a grin, wiggling her eyebrows.

“Oh!” Twilight cried, realizing that this would be a great way to get some answers about its origins and intent. She turned back to the automaton. “Yes. I will be your end user.”

“Registering. Please identify yourself.”

Twilight paused. “Um… my name is Twilight Sparkle."

"Understood. Beginning registration..."

"Um... does that name have any meaning to you?” Twilight asked slowly. "That is, do you know who I am?" This was the moment of truth. The thing had been found in Applejack’s orchard and it had asked for her name. They might find out for certain why it had been seeking her in the first place. Everypony leaned in, holding their breath as they awaited her answer.

“Scanning memory…” it intoned. It was silent for a few moments. “No results found. Subject ‘Twilight Sparkle’ is unknown.”

“What?!” Twilight cried. “But… you were looking for me before we fixed you!”

“Unable to determine. No data prior to this activation is available.”

Vanderbull came in closer. “It might have lost its memory from the lightning strike,” he suggested, letting out a sigh. “We had to replace a lot of its parts, but we couldn’t get into its memory unit without the risk of breaking it. It could have easily been wiped due to the electrical discharge.”

“That,” Applejack said, likewise stepping closer, “or whoever sent it made it lie to ya, Twilight.”

They all looked to the automaton, some giving sideways glances and raising an eyebrow, but it made no reaction whatsoever.

“Why isn’t it saying anything?” Fluttershy asked, looking up at it.

“Oh my, it is a bit unnerving,” Rarity agreed. “It’s just… standing there.”

Twilight made a face. “Relax, everypony, please. She’s not hurting anyone.”

“Wait, ‘she?’” Rainbow Dash echoed Twilight’s phrasing.

“Yeah, she sounds like a mare to me,” Twilight said with a shrug.

“This unit is modeled to simulate the female form,” the automaton said, startling everyone as it joined in the conversation. “I am designated Unit 003M. The M designates me as a ‘mare’ type model. No data about my origin and original directive is available." Its eyes shrank momentarily and it said, "This unit is now registered to end user Twilight Sparkle and will obey her commands. Twilight Sparkle, please designate my Primary Directive.”

Twilight was again confused by the machine’s request and tilted her head. “Your… Directive?”

“I believe,” Vanderbull said, stroking his tuft of beard, “that it wants to know what its purpose is. It is capable of so much, so whatever you tell it to do, it will make that its priority!”

“Oh!" Gadget cried, rushing over to her and placing her hoof on her shoulder. "Princess, if you tell it that it’s purpose is research,” she said with a grin, “we could have it run a bunch of tests back in Manehatten!”

Twilight stood there before this mechanical wonder, barely registering what Gadget had said. She stared at the automaton, eyes wide with amazement and it only stared back with unblinking eyes. Still, that it innately trusted her, directly asked her to tell it what it should do with its existence was both daunting and tantalizing. She could determine a new course for this strange new discovery.

Then she remembered what Vanderbull had told her. Celestia would no doubt find out the machine had been activated, if not from Twilight then from the newspapers. The machine that stood before her had just been activated and already it could be in jeopardy if Princess Celestia ordered it seized or destroyed. This thing, this new wondrous entity was there because of her and now she had taken responsibility for it, but because it had offered up no information about who had created it or sent it, destruction was a distinct possibility. And yet she had no way to protect it, unless it was doing something related to Twilight’s purpose, of course…

The answer dawned on her and she smiled.

“All right, I know what to do,” Twilight said. She pointed a hoof directly at it. “Listen, um, Unit 003M. Here is your new Primary Directive.” The crowd of them stood silent, awaiting to hear what Twilight would order the machine to do.

“Your new Primary Directive is to make friends.”

One could almost feel the change in tone in the air with this strange request and they all looked first to Twilight, and then to the automaton. And then it did something curious.

It actually cocked its head, as if it was just as confused by the request as everypony else. “Please confirm. This unit's primary directive is to ‘make friends’?”

Twilight looked around nervously, but decided to continue. “Yes. I want you to find other ponies and befriend them. Do you understand?”

It righted its head, twitching its ears on its hinges, and said “Understood. Primary Directive ‘Make friends,’ has been engaged.”

It hopped off the table suddenly with a mighty sound as its metallic hooves hit the floor at once, causing them all to jump. Scanning the room, it settled its gaze on Fluttershy and trotted over to her, hooves clanking all the while. Fluttershy regarded its approach with wide-eyed horror and she curled herself into a ball as she backed up against the wall. She looked left and right for escape routes as it closed in on her. The automaton did not halt and went right up to her.

“Yellow pegasus,” it said, pointing at her with one metallic hoof, “what is your designation?”

“W-what?” she asked, flinching from the outstretched metal limb.

“Identify yourself immediately.”

The sternness of this command caused Fluttershy to cower even more, but she managed to croak out "F-Fluttershy."

“Fluttershy, you are hereby designated as a friend. You have 20 seconds to comply.”

“W-what?” She looked to the others for help.

“15 seconds.”

“Eep! Okay, sure, greatseeyoulater!” And with that, she flew to Twilight’s window, propped it open, wriggled through it, and fled out into the night, leaving them all behind.

“Mission successful,” the automaton said, turning back to Twilight. “Twilight Sparkle, shall I proceed to my next target?”

Twilight put a hoof to her forehead, then addressed the doubtful looks from everypony else there. “Um… well, I do love a challenge! Ha ha… heh…”

It was going to be the start of a long process, but Twilight had already made up her mind, no matter what anyone else thought. She was the Princess of Friendship and if anypony could teach friendship to a machine, it was her.

To be continued...

The Uncanny Valley

View Online

“Bye! Thank you so much for coming!” Twilight said as she waved to the Press and the Mayor as they departed the castle. “We hope you found tonight, um… interesting!”

They all waved back as they ventured into the night, likewise smiling, though their smiles looked forced. Twilight didn’t blame them, of course; the night hadn’t exactly gone smoothly. Furthermore, she realized as she turned back inside to return to the room, she would have to deal with her friends’ reactions now that the newsponies had left and they were sure nothing they’d say would end up in the paper.

Naturally, Applejack was the first to speak: “Are you outta yer mind?!” she shouted, tapping her own head for emphasis. "This thing? Make friends?"

Twilight looked to the automaton as it sat nearby. It was watching them all, swiveling its head to instantly lock on to whoever was speaking, which was a bit unnerving. Still, she took a breath and decided to show her resolve.

“I am perfectly rational, thank you, Applejack,” she replied, holding her head up high. “We put this machine together and she is capable of so many things, so why not friendship?”

“That’s actually a good question,” Gadget said, rubbing her chin. “It does show remarkable intelligence and autonomy, so maybe it could.”

Rainbow Dash scoffed loudly. “Yeah, right! Did you see how it ‘made friends’ with Fluttershy? She just screamed and ran out of the building!”

“Well, admittedly, that’s not an abnormal reaction from her even to normal ponies,” Rarity said. She turned back to face Twilight, pursing her lips. “Though, to tell the truth, I have to agree, Twilight. This does seem a little unrealistic.” She noted the automaton staring at her and she shuddered. “And that’s putting it mildly.”

“Okay, so she’s got a lot to learn,” Twilight admitted with a roll of her eyes, “but it’s not fair to not give her a chance! Maybe she just needs practice!”

Vanderbull coughed, getting their attention. “I confess, Princess Twilight, I thought at first this ‘friendship’ idea was merely a ploy to placate Princess Celestia, should she wish to confiscate the automaton. However, it seems you are serious." He hesitated and avoided looking her in the eye momentarily. "While Gadget and I are quite sure it can think somewhat independently, I must warn you that we have no indication that it is at all capable of having emotions. That, as they say, is a horse of a different color.”

“And in this case, it’s metallic gray!” Pinkie added.

Twilight considered this, scratching her head. “Well, we could just try asking her,” she suggested. They all turned to the automaton. “Um, Unit 003, is it?”

“Affirmative.”

Twilight flinched at the sudden, stiff response, but continued. “I’d like to ask you something. Do you have emotions?”

The circles of the automaton’s eyes narrowed momentarily. “Checking current functions… no emotions detected.”

“See, I told ya so!” Applejack exclaimed, stomping her hoof. “How can ya teach friendship to somethin’ that can’t even have emotions?!”

“That phrasing is incorrect,” the automaton intoned, catching them off guard. “This unit is not currently experiencing emotions. However, no query was put forth as to whether or not such a function was possible.”

Twilight, Vanderbull, and Gadget exchanged wide-eyed glances. “Okay then, 003,” Twilight said, leaning gently towards her, “let’s find out. Is it possible for you to have emotions?”

“Checking query,” it said, its eyes narrowing once again as the noise of gears and things inside it grew louder, as did the slight electric hum coming from it. They stood and waited… and waited… and waited for it to respond.

“Ugh,” Rainbow Dash grumbled. “Is this thing ever going to--”

“Systems scanned. Query analyzed,” the machine said, startling them again with its abruptness.

“And…?” Twilight asked. They all leaned in, eager to learn the result.

“Results inconclusive,” it said, drawing a giant sigh from everypony in the room.

“I don’t understand,” Rarity said, turning to Twilight with a furrowed brow. “How can it not know if it can have feelings or not?”

“I know, right?” Pinkie Pie agreed. “I can always tell how I’m feeling! But then I’ve had lots and lots of practice feeling all sorts of things!”

“Hey, that might work!” Twilight said, her head raised as a look of inspiration dawned on her. “Pinkie Pie is right! We've all had lots of practice, so maybe Unit 003 just needs more experiences to learn emotions!”

“The possibility exists,” the machine said. “This unit is capable of learning and imitating ponies through observation and analysis. Emotions could be included in this.”

“Emotions don’t work that way, ya darn machine!” Applejack exploded. “There’s more to emotions than just imitatin’!” She turned to Twilight, seething. “Twilight, this thing is a dangerous hunk o' metal and nothin’ more! You can’t teach it to have feelings or make friends any more than you could teach a rock!”

“Ooh,” Pinkie murmured. She put a hoof to her mouth and whispered, “Don’t ever let Maud hear you say that, or--”

“Whatever!” Applejack shouted. “Shoot, this thing doesn’t even have a proper name!”

“I am identified as Unit 003M, indicating that--”

“Like I said, not a PROPER name!" Applejack shouted, whirling back around to face the machine. "That ain’t a name, it’s just a number!”

Twilight nodded, tapping her chin. “That's true, that's true..."

"Huh? What is?" Applejack asked.

"You might be right about one thing, Applejack,” she said, turning slyly to the automaton. “Calling her ‘Unit Zero Zero Three’ sounds odd. Come on, everypony, let’s think of a new nickname for her! It could be fun!”

The room went silent. Applejack and Rainbow Dash just looked at Twilight sideways, their eyebrows raised. Luckily for Twilight, the others were far more enthusiastic.

“Brass Starlight!” Gadget shouted. “It’s such a cool name and it’s also pretty and it also sounds a little bit like your name, Princess, because you know ‘Twilight?’ ‘Starlight?’ it totally works!”

“Hm,” Twilight said, considering the first suggestion. “No. You're right that it’s a pretty name, but it just doesn’t seem to fit her very well.”

“Perhaps something a bit more descriptive?” Vanderbull offered. He rubbed his horn as he mulled it over. “Brass Hooves?” He pointed at the automaton's hooves, which, as everypony could see, were made of brass.

“Too mundane,” Twilight said, shaking her head. “Sorry, Mr. Vanderbull, but there are a ton of ponies with the last name ‘Hooves.’”

“Well, we could name it ‘Smith,’ since some form of metal smithing went into making it and Smith is, after all, quite a rare name in Equestria.”

“No, no, come on, let’s come up with something a little more catchy!”

Rarity was next to make a suggestion. “I have it! ‘Amethyst Gleam!’ Her eyes are amethysts, correct? And they are gleaming, aren’t they?”

They all looked to the automaton, noticing the brightness of its purple eyes.

“Well…”

“That statement is inaccurate,” it said. “This unit is equipped with lenses shaped from amethyst, but the light emitted is not a true reflective gleam, but the glow of electric filaments designed to detect energies and light beyond the normal pony visible spectrum.”

They all stared at it.

“I guess that’s out then,” Twilight sighed.

“A pity,” Rarity added, sighing right along with her.

“Gear Shift?” Spike proposed. Twilight shook her head. “Top Gear?” he tried again.

“No, something at least descriptive of her!” Twilight said, gesturing to it.

“Heh,” Applejack chuckled, “then how ‘bout ya just name it Junk Heap?”

This got Rainbow Dash snickering. “Oh, or maybe Rust Bucket!” she added.

“Ha! Good one, Rainbow Dash!” Applejack laughed.

Twilight stared daggers at the two of them. “Come on, Applejack, Rainbow Dash! You both have a lot of creativity, can’t you think of something more, I don’t know, feminine?”

Applejack considered this, shutting her eye and scratching her head, and Twilight thought she might be taking it more seriously.

“Jalopy Jane!” she exclaimed, bursting into laughter, which soon spread to Rainbow Dash.

“Okay that’s--”

“No, no, wait, I’ve got one, AJ: Clanky!” Rainbow shot back. “Because it keeps making noise every time it moves!”

“Ha! How ‘bout Motorhead?”

“Wind-up!”

“Tin Can!”

“Hahahaha! Wait, I got it, AJ: Twilight wants feminine? How about ‘Enginiffer!’”

“WILL YOU TWO CUT IT OUT?!” Twilight shouted, silencing the pair’s attempts to outdo each other as she slammed her front hooves on the floor. “If you’re not going to come up with serious names, then maybe you should just leave!”

Applejack shrugged her shoulders. “Fine by me,” she said, standing up. She began making her way to the door. “Don’t take it personal, Twi, but I just don’t think that machine” here she narrowed her eyes at the automaton, “is capable of anything but calculatin’ and talkin’ funny.”

As Applejack walked out of the room, eyes turned to Rainbow Dash. “Ehh, I’ve gotta admit, Twilight, I kind of agree with AJ." She sighed and offered her a smile. "Buuut I’ll still stick around if it means we get to choose an awesome name!”

Twilight smiled, though she gave one last look at the door after Applejack was gone. Regardless, they were still no closer to settling on a name, so she turned to the only one so far who hadn’t suggested a name.

“Pinkie?" she asked gently. "Do you have any ideas for a name?"

Pinkie tapped her noggin, sticking her tongue out and squinting one eye as she thought. “Ummm… ooh, how about ‘Autumn Eight!’ Get it, because it sounds like ‘Automate!’ Hee hee!”

Twilight nodded appreciatively. “The ‘eight’ part doesn’t quite fit, but that’s pretty clever, Pinkie! That's the spirit! Okay, come on, everypony, we can do it!”

“I know, I know,” Gadget said, “we could name her ‘Aya,’ since she’s an artificial intelligence, or A.I., just like the character in that great movie serial, ‘Green Lampony: The Animated Serial!’”

“Oh my gosh, I love that serial!” Spike gushed, jumping over to her. “Can you believe they cancelled it?”

“I know! And on a cliffhanger!" she groaned, tossing her head back. "Oh, it was so romantic and sad and I wanted to know if her boyfriend would ever find her--”

“--and if he was really going to become a Blue Lampony! Well, I’ve got a theory that--”

“Gadget!” / “Spike!” Vanderbull and Twilight both said in unison, silencing the prattling of their respective assistants.

“Ugh, why is this so difficult?” Twilight groaned, rubbing her temples. “Does anypony have something else? Anything good?”

Vanderbull scratched his head before suggesting: “Ironsides?”

“My lateral external hull is largely composed of alloys other than iron, such as--”

“Yes, yes, fine,” Vanderbull said with a roll of his eyes, cutting off the automaton.

“Uh, Electric Charger?” Spike offered.

“No, no, no!” Twilight said, shooting that one down. “We want something that sounds less like an appliance.”

“Copper Clock?” Rainbow suggested.

“Same basic problem, so no.”

“Welllll,” Rarity began, searching her thoughts, moving her hoof in a circular motion, “it’s made of clockwork, so… maybe something more simple and elegant like… ‘Spinning Cog!’”

They were all silent at that. “Hey, that’s not bad, Rarity!” Twilight said, lifting her head as she smiled. She turned to the automaton. “Any objections, 003?”

The automaton again tilted its head and shifted its ears. Twilight was starting to understand that this was something it did when it was confused… or maybe just didn’t immediately know how to answer the question. She thought it was rather cute. Maybe she could warm up to this machine, and soon the others would--

“The name is acceptable,” it intoned.

“Hurray!” Twilight cheered, kicking her legs in the air. “Everypony, I now officially present Spi--”

“However, its accuracy is offset by the illogicality of naming this unit for only one of its parts, and one that is not outwardly significant.”

Rainbow Dash groaned. “This thing speaks more Egghead than you, Twilight. What’s it saying?”

“Clarifying: to put it in terms you might understand, it would be the equivalent of naming a pony ‘Functional Intestine.’”

The room was silent as a tomb as each of them made a face.

“Ech,” Rarity said, breaking the silence as she made a gagging motion. “Well, we can’t possibly use ‘Spinning Cog’ now! I’ll never be able to get that name out of my head if we do.”

Twilight collapsed, sliding to the floor in frustration. “Okay, I give up. Maybe I’ll have some better ideas in the morning. That’s it for now, everypony, thanks for coming!”

***

As Twilight led her guests to the door, chatting all the way, Vanderbull had his own business to attend to. “Gadget?” he whispered, getting his assistant’s attention.

“Hm? Yes, Commodore?” she asked, raising her head to smile at her mentor.

“Come with me, please, I’d like to speak with you in private.”

“Huh? O-oh,” she said, lowering her ears, thinking she’d done something wrong.

When they were out in the hall, Vanderbull continued what he had to say. “I realize it has been an abnormally long day and I can tell you are tired, but I want you to do one last favor for me before we turn in for the evening.”

“Ah, of course, sir!” she said, snapping to attention. She smiled, realizing that she was apparently not in trouble.

“I’d like you to go to the local telegraph office and have word sent to Alfredo to bring the private train tomorrow around 9 or 10 o’clock at the latest. It’s time to return home.”

“You… you’re leaving, sir?” she asked, tilting her head to the side, puzzled by this sudden decision.

“No, actually," he swallowed, "we are leaving. We have to get back to work.”

“But… but what about the automaton?!” Her eyes went wide and she tensed up and her breathing became rapid.

“Gadget, we--”

“Please, sir, we have a fully functioning intelligent automaton in that room! This is a lifelong dream of mine!” She placed a hoof on her chest.

“Well, young as you are, that’s not really so long,” he replied jokingly. The humor was lost on her.

“But there is so much to learn and we can study this machine directly! We have to stay!" she cried. "I have to find out more!”

He cleared his throat and looked at her sternly. “Gadget...”

“Please, sir!” she cried, bursting into tears and actually latching onto his leg. “Please please please let me stay!”

“Gadget, control yourself!” he snapped gruffly, clenching his fists. He shook his leg slightly, causing her to let go. “Look at yourself. Begging? Really, I thought I had taught you to compose yourself more professionally.”

“B-but…” she blubbered.

“This is why I called you out here; I had a feeling you would react this way and the last thing anyone needs is to see you making a scene." He sighed, rubbing his temples, but tried to soften his tone. "Now, I am very sorry; and you're right that the automaton truly is a treasure of science. There’s a wealth of knowledge to be had here and if there was any way we could take it with us, then you can be sure that is what I would do." He stood up straight and straightened his tie. "However, that mechanical pony belongs to Her Highness. For now, she will take charge of it, not us.”

“Do you… I’m sorry, I hate to doubt Princess Twilight," she said, choking back another sob, "but do you think the automaton really can learn to be friends with ponies?”

“In all honesty, I think it’s a bit of a waste of time,” he said quietly, glancing down the hallway. “But that’s not important. What matters is that Princess Twilight has a reason, in fact the best reason, for keeping the automaton safe, as far as Princess Celestia is concerned. I believe that Celestia would likely confiscate it from anypony else who laid claim to it, including us. Twilight Sparkle, however, is still royalty and friendship is her domain, and if I know Celestia, then she will respect that. We can let it be and, should Princess Twilight decide that she can’t teach the machine friendship, then hopefully by that time Princess Celestia will have overcome her initial fear. Then we can take it back to Manehatten.”

“That could work,” Gadget admitted reluctantly, lowering her head. “But in the meantime, the testing--”

Vanderbull silenced her with a raised hand. “In addition to her own goal, I’m sure Her Highness, with her equal love of science, would be willing to conduct some experiments on our behalf."

“I… yes, sir, but… how can you just leave it in someone else’s hooves?” She removed her glasses and wiped her eyes on her sleeves, finally getting better control of herself. “Don’t you want to see what it can do firsthand?”

“Yes, and that’s why I came in the first place. But the truth is that we came at a fairly bad time." He sighed. "I would never have taken time away from the business had it not been for how special this discovery is. Now I need to return to work. That blasted Rockefoaler is demanding a deeper discount for shipping his cargo on the train lines, Dodge Junction needs more security from bandits, and we really need to establish more stops for refueling on the way to Appleloosa. Do you know that they still need to have stallions pull the train for the last leg of the trip just to conserve fuel?”

She made a face. “Still? Also, Rockefoaler? That guy gives me the creeps.”

“Yes. And I think he wants to take this bull by the horns." He pointed at his own horns for effect. "So now you see why I need to be back.”

“Then why can’t I at least--”

“Gadget, listen carefully: we did not get the information we were after tonight. We still do not know who built this marvel or for what reason. And that could be a serious problem. I need you to go off the list of parts incorporated into the automaton and try to determine who had the means, knowledge, and time to build it. Nopony else has that sort of encyclopedic knowledge or the skill to find the answer quickly. My young friend, I am serious: I need your help, and you will be helping Princess Twilight as well.”

She swallowed and bowed her head. “Y-yes sir. I’m sorry, I just got too excited.”

Vanderbull smiled. “Nothing so wrong with that,” he said, ruffling her messy mane affectionately. “Your zeal for science is admirable. The world needs more excited enthusiasts. But in the meantime, we must play it safe until we are certain that the danger has passed.”

“Right, Mr. Vanderbull.” She smiled weakly and saluted. “I’ll head to the telegraph office.”

“And I’ll let Princess Twilight know our plans and thank her for her time. I’m certain she’ll be eager to get on with her new project.”

***

That night, Twilight was lying in bed, tossing and turning. She’d been asleep, but had finally woken up after some half-remembered nightmare. There was some metallic sound, she remembered that much, and then… she couldn’t remember. Her troubled thoughts were making it hard to settle down.

This is all off to a rough start, she thought. The whole evening had been a mixture of success and failure, she supposed. On one hand, they had managed to reactivate the automaton, but Unit 003 had no useful information for them. They discovered that it really was intelligent and could interact without someone controlling it, but it wasn’t exactly endearing with its cold, mechanical voice and stiff mannerisms. It didn’t seem dangerous, but she had to admit she was feeling more nervous now that Vanderbull had told her that he and Gadget were leaving. Without their help, she was the only one who even seemed to care about protecting it or teaching it anything.

She remembered what Applejack had said: “I just don’t think that machine is capable of anything but calculatin’ and talkin’ funny.” Those words were starting to sink in.

How did I expect everypony to react? she asked herself, turning over in her bed. Unit 003 is a machine, after all. And right now, Applejack is right; she can't do much at all. But maybe with some practice I can teach her to act more normally around ponies. Maybe…

“Augh!”

Twilight sat up at the sound of Spike’s yelping and was even more startled when he jumped onto her bed, looking like he’d just seen a ghost.

“Spike? What in Equestria are you do--augh!” she screamed as she looked up, her eyes going wide as she clutched the bedsheet.

There, at the foot of her bed, a pair of seemingly disembodied violet eyes stared at her, glowing brightly in the darkness, practically boring a hole into her very being.

“Good evening, Twilight Sparkle.” The machine spoke as though Twilight had simply awoken from a light nap, rather than getting scared half to death.

“T-twilight?” Spike whispered, gripping her tightly as he stared at the thing. “What is it doing in the bedroom?”

“I… 003?" Twilight asked, just as unnerved as Spike was. "Were you… were you watching me? While I slept?”

“Affirmative.”

She blinked. “Why?!”

“You have not given me any new orders. It seemed logical to be prepared to receive my next orders as soon as you awakened to give them. Furthermore, in your unconscious state, you were vulnerable. To better serve my end user, I determined that I should stand watch in case of danger.”

Twilight blinked several times. What does it think I need protection from? Is it normal for an automaton to be paranoid?

“I have also been closely monitoring your biological functions," 003 continued. "Your breathing and heart rate seem normal. Also, judging by the sounds emitted by your tract, are likely digesting your most recent meal sufficiently.”

Twilight made a face, crossing her forelegs over her belly. “Get out of my room!” she screamed indignantly. “You nearly gave me and Spike a heart attack!”

“Now exiting room. In clarification, though your heart rates increased upon waking, there is no indication of cardiac arrest.”

It turned, the shine from its eyes dimly illuminating the room as it moved to the door. The gears and things inside it were heard with each metallic step that echoed throughout the room. When it reached the door, it opened it and then stopped to stand in the doorway, creating a strange black silhouette, its purple eyes going back to that same piercing stare.

“What are you doing now?” Twilight demanded, growing more and more irritated.

“I have left your room, Twilight Sparkle. I will now resume monitoring you. I await further orders when you regain consciousness.”

“Oh for pony’s sake!” Spike exclaimed, rolling his eyes. “Can’t you just go to bed or something?”

“I am capable of going into a low-powered ‘sleep mode’ to conserve power when not occupied, if that is what you request. However, I would be unable to stand guard capably if placed in such a state of low function.”

“Look, that’s fine,” Twilight said, rubbing her eyes. “Just go back downstairs and go to sleep. Sleep mode. Whatever!”

“Understood. Proceeding to location. You may reactivate me by addressing me or simply tapping my cranial hull. Auditory sensors will enable me to reboot quickly.”

“Yes, okay, go!” Twilight said, just wanting the automaton out of her bedchamber. She watched as it turned around and walked away. She heard it clanking and the gears turning even as it went down the hall and then on every last step right until it finally made it downstairs.

“That thing creeps me out,” Spike whispered once he was fairly certain 003 was out of hearing range.

“I know,” Twilight said. She shivered, holding herself. "What kind of pony just watches somepony else while they sleep like that? Not even the Royal Guard does that with Princess Celestia! She at least has some privacy!"

“And I don’t think our other friends like 003 very much either,” he added, hopping off her bed and returning to his own.

“Well, that’s too bad, because she’s going to stay with us for a while." She groaned, falling back on her bed. "Let’s just try to get back to sleep, okay?”

But inwardly, even she was starting to doubt her capability of teaching it how to interact, let alone teaching it friendship. She settled back into bed, however, and let herself relax. The warmth of the sheets wrapped around her was comforting and soon the regular breathing coming from her assistant lulled her to the edge of sleep.

It’s down there.

Her eyes went wide as that one thought suddenly came to the surface. You don’t know who built it, but that machine with no feelings and a mind of its own is downstairs. It is in your house and even when it “sleeps” it can still hear you, which means it isn’t really asleep at all. It was watching you. It will keep watching you. It will imitate you. She shut her eyes even tighter, trying to ignore the doubts as they worsened. It may one day decide to replace you. That thing is down there, waiting, and it will never stop thinking, and the moment it feels threatened, it may turn on you. The thing that can shatter rocks with its hooves might turn on you.

She popped open one eye and looked around. There was nothing in the room, no purple eyes, no gears turning.

She told herself that there was nothing to be afraid of. Nevertheless, it was another hour before she finally nodded off, and she only fell asleep then after utterly wearing herself out as she struggled with all the possible outcomes of what would happen to herself and her friends all because she had let that horrible thing into her house.

***

Twilight opened her eyes. The room was quiet now, and not even the sound of Spike’s breathing could be heard. She sat up in bed, levitating the sheets off of herself. She stretched out, yawning and smacking her lips. The room was brighter now as the sunlight ebbed through the windows. With a look around, she confirmed Spike was not in the room.

And then that thought struck her. Spike wasn't there.

“Spike?” she asked uncertainly. She stepped out into the hallway. “Spike?” she called again, her voice echoing in the hallway. The events from last night still haunted her. That machine. The eyes. It had been in her room. What if it had returned? What if it had done something? What if Spike had done something and accidentally triggered its self-defense mode again and then…

Her eyes went wide. “Spike!” She was shouting his name now, and she grit her teeth, eyes wide as her panic began to grow. She galloped down the hallway and then to the stairs. She didn’t even bother to take them but instead teleported down them and looked all around. Wait a minute, she thought, didn’t I tell 003 to go downstairs? But then… where is it? And then she heard a sound coming from the kitchen.

Carefully, moving slowly and stealthily as she could, she made her way to the kitchen and let her magic gently envelop the door handle. She took a deep breath and then threw it open violently.

“Where’s Spike?!” she bellowed, bursting into the kitchen.

In front of her, to her surprise, was Gadget. She had the Point Dexter on again and she appeared to be using her various mechanical hands to make breakfast. A few hands were cooking and seasoning an omelette. Another pair was mixing some batter in a bowl. The poor girl nearly dropped all of her things in fright when Twilight burst into the room. “Oh! Um, good morning, Princess Twilight!” she said, laying a foreleg on her chest. “Did you sleep well?”

“Gadget?” she asked. “What’s going on?”

“Um. I thought I’d make breakfast for you and Spike. If that's okay, I mean." She coughed and looked slightly to her right. "And, um... Spike is actually behind the door.”

Twilight turned and let the door shut. Apparently, in her haste to open it, she had accidentally smashed the poor dragon behind it, upending the platter of toast he had been carrying in the process.

“Oh my gosh, Spike, are you okay?” she asked, rushing to his side. “I’m so sorry!”

“I’m fine, I’m fine,” he said, grunting as he brushed the butter, jam, and toast off himself. “This toast is toast, though.”

“Ha!” Gadget laughed, turning back to her cooking. “I bet Miss Pinkie would like that joke!”

“Wait, a minute,” Twilight said, shaking her head, still feeling slightly panicked. “Where is the automaton?”

“What do you mean, Twilight? 003 is right there,” Spike said, pointing to the other end of the kitchen.

Twilight turned and shouted in surprise.

The automaton was standing by the counter, squeezing an orange over a pitcher, slowly juicing it between its hooves. “Good morning, Twilight Sparkle,” it said. “Your heart rate indicates distress. Are you injured or do you require assistance?”

“I… no, but… what are you…" She turned from it, deciding she wasn't in the mood for its odd answers. "Er, Gadget, what is it doing?”

“Making orange juice,” she replied casually.

“Affirmative," 003 said. "I am exsanguinating oranges for consumption of their juice. It is part of a complete breakfast.” It finished juicing one orange, set the flattened fruit down, and picked up another, methodically juicing it in the exact same way.

“What? Why?”

“Gadget Giroux reactivated me 34 minutes and 29 seconds ago by means of mentioning my name and enlisted me to assist with the preparation of the meal.”

“She said she wanted to stand guard by the door in case of intruders for whatever reason," Gadget added, "but then I convinced her to help me out.”

“That is correct. As an organic being, Twilight Sparkle requires regular intake of sustenance. It was logical that I contribute to the well-being of my end user toward that goal.” It finished juicing the orange and stuck out its empty hooves. “Oranges depleted. Insert additional citrus to continue.”

“I think that’s enough juice, 003,” Gadget said, smiling at it. “Can you pour this batter into the biscuit tray for me, please?”

Twilight gawked at how friendly Gadget was being with it, though she had to admit that she was somewhat flattered by it wanting her to stay healthy.

“I am able, Gadget. Twilight Sparkle,” it said, getting her attention, “shall I continue to assist her or do you require me for a separate task?”

“What? I mean… no. That’s fine,” she answered, eyeing it warily.

“Understood. Proceeding with batter distribution,” it said.

“You can go wait in the dining room if you want, Princess,” Gadget said, turning her attention to the omelette. “Mr. Vanderbull’s having some tea and reading the paper. I’m putting mushrooms, tomatoes, and peppers in this omelette and it is going to be de-lish-us!”

“Okay,” Twilight said slowly, then stopped. “Wait, did you call Unit 003 a ‘she’ a moment ago?”

“Uh-huh,” she replied, not looking at her as she tended to the omelette, gently turning it with a spatula. “Why wouldn't I? Didn’t you call her a ‘she’ last night?”

Twilight paused, her eyes darting between Gadget and the automaton. “I… I did, yes. Hm.”

She turned, giving one last look over her shoulder, and went to the dining room. Decorated up in Rarity’s accents, it really was a wonderful place to enjoy a meal, although even that wasn’t enough to put her completely at ease. Sitting at the table was Vanderbull, a teacup in one hand, a folded newspaper in the other.

“Ah, good morning, Your Highness,” he said, smiling warmly. “It seems we made the front page.”

He slid the newspaper over to Twilight and she levitated it up to herself to read the story. There on the front page, taking up a huge section of the top half, was the picture of Unit 003 right as it had been activated last night. Twilight and Vanderbull and a few of her friends were in the other pictures. The headline was bold and clear across the top:

The Iron Horse:
Harrowing Tale of the Thinking Machine!

“Wow,” Twilight said. “This is going to get some attention.”

“I imagine the story will hit Canterlot soon.” Vanderbull took a sip of his tea, raising an eyebrow as he did so. “I wonder what Princess Celestia’s reaction will be. You might get quite a letter today, Your Highness.”

Twilight gulped. Though the article was mostly positive, the reporters had included the incident when the automaton had nearly attacked them. Celestia was probably not going to be pleased about that.

“Nothing to be done about it now,” Vanderbull continued. “I’m sure this will all calm down soon." He sighed, frowning and putting down his teacup and steepling his fingers as he looked at her. "I do hate to leave you at such a juncture, however. If Gadget and I could stay, I assure you we would.”

“No, I… I guess I can handle things on my own." Then she smiled, drawing herself up. "Well, I'm not really ‘on my own.’ My friends will help!”

“One would hope they’d be more receptive to the machine, but I suppose some resistance is expected. It isn’t what I would call 'cute' by any means.”

You can say that again, Twilight thought, but she kept the sentiment to herself.

Just then, Gadget entered, carrying four different plates with her mechanical hands. “Breakfast is served!” she exclaimed.

“Great, I’m starving!” Spike said, taking his place at the table.

Following Gadget, to everyone’s surprise, was Unit 003. A platter of toast was balanced perfectly on its back, which was made even more impressive as it was holding the pitcher of orange juice steadily on one hoof as it walked.

“Such a finely-tuned, incredible work of technological innovation,” Vanderbull breathed. Then he frowned. “And we’re using it to make and serve breakfast of all things.”

“Here are your eggs, everypony!” Gadget said cheerfully, setting the food before them all. 003 followed suit.

They all began their meal, taking a bite.

“Mmm!” Twilight’s first bite of the omelette was a little piece of heaven. “Wow, this is delicious! Thank you, Gadget!”

“You’re welcome, Princess!” she replied with a smile. Then she was silent and simply stared at Twilight, her smile frozen in place. “Um… and?” she asked.

Twilight took a drink of orange juice. “And… what?”

“Well, it’s just that, you know, um… 003 helped too.” She jerked her head toward at the automaton.

Twilight turned. 003 was sliding the tray of toast onto the table, going about its business without interruption.

“All right then,” Twilight began, clearing her throat as she looked to 003. “Uh, thank you for helping with breakfast, Unit 003.”

“Gratitude acknowledged.” It didn't look up as it said this.

Twilight blinked. “Was that its way of saying ‘You’re welcome?’”

“Ha!” Spike said, biting into the toast. “I think she’s funny! Last night she was a little creepy, but she’s kind of cool when she’s just helping around the castle! Looks like with me, Owloysius, and now her, you have three assistants, Twilight!”

She. Spike was using the feminine too.

“Oh, by the way, everypony,” Vanderbull said, “we should probably eat quickly and then Gadget and I must finish packing away our things. I received a telegram while you were all in the kitchen and it seems that our train will arrive around 9:30.”

Gadget sagged visibly at this news, her head and ears both lowering. “Yes, Commodore,” she said quietly.

Twilight felt sorry for the poor girl. She really was interested in the automaton, even more than Twilight. In fact, judging by how well she had co-opted it to make breakfast, she might be the one best suited to “training” it.

No, no, I said I would teach it friendship, so I will learn how to interact with it. I can do this!

“Well, I will be glad to go with you both to the train station and see you off, if you like,” Twilight offered.

“Really?” Gadget exclaimed, her ears perking back up. “Oh, yes, thank you!”

Vanderbull smirked as he resumed reading his paper. But he let Gadget have her excitement and merely smiled at Twilight. "Only if it's no bother."

“Bother? No, it’s my pleasure!" She turned to Gadget. "Besides, Gadget, you’ve even shown me how I can start working with Unit 003! We’ll get along fine!”

She was about to take another bite of her omelette when she turned and saw 003 standing right next to her, staring at her again with those glowing purple eyes.

“...Eventually,” she added.

***

A few hours later, they were at the train station and watching Vanderbull’s servants load up the crates of supplies they’d brought back onto his private train. Spike and Unit 003 were back at the castle cleaning up after breakfast.

“I really can’t thank you enough. Both of you.” Twilight smiled at the odd pair: the hulking minotaur in the fine suit and the messy little earth pony filly with the mechanical limbs. “I’ll be sorry to see you go.”

Vanderbull bowed slightly. “Yes, it was quite the experience and a genuine delight to meet you, Your Hi-- ahem... Twilight.”

Both Twilight and Gadget gawked at the sound of him finally dropping the formal title altogether.

“I… wow,” Gadget began, trying to find her words. Then she turned to Twilight as well. “Er, what I mean is that I will also miss you T-t-t-t-Twilight.” She blushed profusely.

Twilight suppressed a laugh, covering her mouth.

“So,” Gadget said, changing the subject, “it’ll be interesting to see if you can really teach Unit 003 friendship. I mean, it’s a fascinating machine, but who can say if it’s even really conscious at all?”

“Yeah,” Twilight sighed. “But it shouldn’t be too hard. I mean, it can talk and respond to things we say to it, so it must be conscious, right?”

“Not according to the Griffonese Room Argument," Gadget remarked offhandedly, turning to watch Vanderbull's servants load the train.

“The what now?” Twilight asked, raising an eyebrow.

Gadget whirled around, her eyes wide and her smile broad and gleaming. "Well, since you asked..."

Vanderbull put his hand to his forehead. “Oh no, here she goes again,” he muttered. “I’ll go supervise the help while you prattle on, Gadget. Please don't bore her to death.” He left the two of them behind.

Gadget, undaunted, continued her explanation. “As I was saying: there was this philosopher named Searle Biscuit around when automatons were becoming popular and some of them were getting pretty sophisticated. Some ponies thought one day they could program machines with punch cards and stuff so they could talk and think like we do. Searle said it wasn’t possible.”

“Why?”

“He gave an example. Do you know anything about Old Griffonese?”

Twilight nodded. “It’s what griffons used to speak as their main language in the Griffon Kingdom before they adopted Equestrian. It’s mostly ceremonial now. Oh, and since it has a lot of screeches and caws and roars, it’s really hard for ponies to speak it.”

“Right. Well, Searle Biscuit imagined a room filled with books. For every single possible thing you could say in Griffonese, there would be a response for it in those books. A pony sits in the room and a griffon is outside the room. The griffon says something in Griffonese and the pony inside quickly looks up the phrase in a book and gives the corresponding Griffonese response. It's not translation, and no Equestrian is involved; it's just 'If the griffon says A, you say B,' but, to the griffon outside, it seems like the pony inside is speaking Griffonese.”

“But… he isn’t,” Twilight said. “Not really. The pony doesn't understand what he's saying.”

“That’s the point,” Gadget said excitedly. “It gives the illusion of actually thinking and responding, but it’s really just pre-programmed input and response!”

“And you think that might be what Unit 003 is doing?”

“I honestly don’t know,” Gadget sighed. “It might be impossible to know. But, speaking of griffons, there is this brilliant griffon engineer over in Trottingham called Talon Turing."

"Talon Turing?" Twilight asked. "That name sounds a little familiar."

"It should, the guy is designing these amazing new machines and computers that may one day revolutionize mathematics and data analysis. Absolutely brilliant." She sighed, taking on a dreamy, faraway look. "I hope someday I get to meet him."

Twilight tapped her on the shoulder, bringing her back to reality. "But what does Dr. Turing have to do with this?"

"Oh! Well, he thinks machines will be as smart as ponies someday. He says that computers will get better and better and may one day be a lot like us, so we just need to create a test to see how similarly a machine can think like us and then we’ll know if it’s really intelligent.”

“Machines as smart as ponies?” Twilight wondered. “Wow... That would be amazing. Though I’m not sure Princess Celestia would approve, if Mr. Vanderbull is right.”

Gadget shrugged. "Guess we'll find out if any machine ever gets smart enough to take Dr. Turing's proposed test." She chuckled. "Or maybe we've already found that machine. And maybe we're already testing her."

Twilight tightened her lips as she considered that.

Then there was a sound and they both turned to see Vanderbull approaching. Gadget's excitement drained away and scrunched herself inward, drooping her ears.

“It seems everything is ready,” Vanderbull said. “We must bid our host adieu, Gadget.”

She sighed, but nodded took her place next to him. “Yes, sir,” she said gloomily.

“We will be in touch if you need us,” Vanderbull said, bowing to Twilight courteously. “And Gadget will endeavor to discover who manufactured the automaton for you. I have total faith in her, and I hope you do as well."

Gadget smiled slightly at that. "Thank you, sir." She stood up straight. "I'll do my best, Twilight."

"Good luck with your experiments," Vanderbull continued, "and we will send some suggestions for experiments of our own, should it be convenient.”

“It’s… it was a real honor,” Gadget added, trying to find the right words. “If you need our help, of course, we will be glad to return. We are at your service.”

“Don’t be silly! You both are welcome to visit whenever you like!” she said. “After all we went through with this, I’m happy to call you both my friends.”

Vanderbull smiled at this. Gadget, always the ball of energy, looked like she was about to explode in a supernova of joy. “F-friends?” she gasped, tears forming in her eyes. “Oh, yes, yes, of course! I would love to come visit the next time I have some free time! It shouldn't even be too long! M-maybe even next week?”

“Next week? Well, if you have time to visit, then we won't have to wait long!” Twilight said smiling warmly. "Until we meet again."

“Until we meet again,” Vanderbull agreed, and he turned toward the train.

Gadget was about to follow when she paused, then suddenly rushed over and wrapped her hooves around Twilight in a surprise hug. “Thank you so much, Princess Twilight,” she whispered. She let her go and Twilight watched her go with a smile. Just as Gadget was about to get on the train, she looked back over her shoulder.

“I really think you’ve got the right idea, Princess!” she yelled, cupping her hoof by her mouth. “And when it comes to figuring out what the automaton can do, making friends just might be the perfect Turing test!”

Twilight nodded and waved goodbye as the train rumbled and slowly began to move away. And then she slowed her waving and her eyes went wide. “Oh my gosh… that’s it. That's it!”

***

Twilight was giddy with excitement as she flew back home, dipping and soaring as she went. She was planning to land on her balcony when she spotted something going on just outside the castle. What is going on down there? she wondered, narrowing her eyes. As she flew in closer, she saw a crowd of ponies gathered around, all watching in curiosity and fascination. She even began to hear their “oohs” and “ahhs.” And then she made some sounds of her own when she got close enough to see what they were watching.

"Hoofball acquired."

“Come on, 003, fire it over here!” Spike shouted excitedly.

Twilight gawked, eyes wide and mouth gone slack. She couldn’t believe what she was seeing: Spike and 003 were tossing around a hoofball.

“Commencing firing procedure,” 003 said. It tossed the ball into the air and then turned around rapidly. With one swift motion, it bucked the ball with its back hooves directly into Spike’s claws.

Of course, it did so with such force that Spike was propelled back a few meters. “Oof! Okay, maybe not that hard!” he said, rubbing his belly. Then he grinned. “Okay, 003, catch this!”

He tossed the ball long. So long, in fact, that no normal pony could have caught it. However…

“Engaging E-Mode.” With a sudden burst of speed, 003 dashed away and leaped into the air, snatching the ball in its hooves with perfect precision before casually trotting back to its original spot. “Hoofball acquired.”

The crowd cheered. Over it, Spike groaned. “Seriously, do you have to say that every single time you catch it?”

“Spike!” Twilight exclaimed landing next to him. “What in Celestia’s name are you doing?”

“Huh? Oh, Twilight, you’re back!" Spike said obliviously. "Well, we’re playing catch!”

“You’re playing catch?! With 003?! Out here where everypony can see?!”

“Affirmative,” 003 said. “We are playing catch out here where everypony can see. No ponies present appear to be visually impaired.”

“That’s not what I-- ugh, never mind! Both of you, get in the castle!” she shouted, stomping with one hoof.

“Aww,” the crowd said collectively, sorry to see the spectacle end. As they all departed, Twilight ushered the two of them back inside.

“Spike, I’m not sure Ponyville is quite ready to meet the world’s first independent automaton!” she said, placing a hoof to her forehead exasperatedly. “Why did you bring it outside?”

“It was determined that the activity of playing catch would damage your residence if played inside,” 003 explained.

“Oh for pony’s sake, just sit there and be quiet!” Twilight snapped.

The automaton sat down with a loud metallic clunk as its titanium-alloy posterior hit the floor.

“Look, Spike,” she sighed, “I’m glad you’re getting along with it-- er, with her better.” She swallowed, remembering to use the feminine. “But just… ask me first before exposing her to the public again, okay? I just don't want to turn her into a spectacle.”

Spike nodded. “Sure. Sorry, Twilight.”

“It’s okay,” she said, nuzzling him with her cheek. “Now, let’s get back to the matter at hoof." She cleared her throat and turned to her mechanical companion. "Unit 003?”

She stood up again as soon as Twilight addressed her.

“I’ve decided on a new name for you.” She drew herself up and paused dramatically. “Apparently there's a scientist named Talon Turing who thinks that one day machines will be just as smart as ponies. He's even proposed testing that theory and I think you might be the first machine to pass that test! So, in honor of that, from now on I’d like to call you... Turing Test.”

Spike considered the name for a moment, crossing his arms and tilting his head to the left and right. Finally, he said, “Yeah, sure, it has a good ring to it. Turing. Turing Test. Nice!”

“Glad you like it, Spike,” she said. “What about you, Unit-- I mean, Turing Test? Is that name okay?”

The automaton stood there, again making mechanical clicking sounds as it considered the moniker. “Designation ‘Turing Test’ is acceptable.”

Twilight stood watching her, waiting to see some other reaction, but Turing Test made no further movement and said nothing else, positive or negative. Twilight sighed and turned away. Oh well. I guess she is still a machine. I can’t expect her to react--

“Twilight Sparkle.”

She whirled around at the sound of her name. “Y-yes?”

“You have given me a unique designation.” She slowly twitched her ears. “Thank you.”

She stared at her intently, but Turing Test still had the same blank, inscrutable expression she always had. But in spite of herself, Twilight had to smile at those two little words.

“Gratitude acknowledged,” she replied.

To be continued...

Author's Notes:

For this chapter, the story was easy enough. The tough part was names. First, there's the title, "The Uncanny Valley," which refers to the feeling of disgust people feel when a machine is lifelike enough to resemble a person, but not lifelike enough to not be creepy. You can read more about it here.

Secondly, there were the real-life cognitive science terms and people. If you'd rather figure them out yourself, I've got spoiler tags!

-Searle Biscuit = Combination of the philosopher John Searle and the racehorse Seabiscuit

-The Griffonese Room Argument = The Chinese Room Experiment which works just like Gadget described it.

-Talon Turing = The computer science pioneer Alan Turing, who really did first describe the Turing test

And lastly, the names. All in all, I had a list of over 30 different names to choose (including the purposefully terrible ones). A lot of them did get mentioned in the chapter already, but there were really 3 front-runners, and "Turing Test" was the one that I and my artist friend, Colby Green, (who draws the art for this story) liked best. If you're curious, the runners-up were: Sprockette (3rd) and Cog Nisha (2nd).

For a more detailed discussion about it, check out this blog post about how I ended up choosing.

As always thank you for reading!

Any Sufficiently Advanced Technology...

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“And then she just said ‘Thank you!’ Right out of the blue!” Twilight gushed. “Can you believe it?” She was with her friends, enjoying a light lunch at a local cafe in Ponyville and she’d just finished relating the events of that morning.

Her enthusiasm was met with a range of expressions from her friends, however, and not one of them was very encouraging.

“Well, um… it’s good that your scary mechanical pony was polite, Twilight,” Fluttershy said quietly, looking up through downcast eyes.

“Aww, I missed out on breakfast?” Pinkie Pie asked, her bottom lip quivering.

“Whoa whoa whoa,” Rainbow Dash interjected, holding up her hooves, “you named it what now?”

“Her name is Turing Test,” Twilight replied.

Rainbow snickered as she rolled her eyes. “Jeez, Twilight, only you would be a big enough egghead to name something after a test.”

And Applejack just sat there the whole time with a sour look on her face as she occasionally took a bite of her sandwich, and Twilight was pretty sure the sandwich wasn’t to blame.

She heaved a sigh. This was not the reception she’d been hoping for. Still, she’d met her friends to discuss the next phase of her plan and she wasn’t going to be put off by bad attitudes.

“I need you all to understand why I brought this up." She leaned forward, pressing her hooves to the table. "Turing Test is learning and she can interact better with ponies! We just need to figure out how to influence her and I know she can make some progress!”

“Twilight, dear,” Rarity began, setting her salad aside for a moment as she demurely wiped her mouth, “I know you want to make a breakthrough with that, um… with Turning Test…”

“Turing.”

“Yes, yes, that. But are you sure you aren’t just reaching? There's nothing remarkable about saying 'Thank you,' after all. I mean, I don’t know much about machines, but maybe you’re seeing progress because you want to?”

“I’m… well, I don’t think so,” Twilight said, but now that Rarity said it, she supposed maybe she did want her plan to work so much that was being overly optimistic. She shook her head, clearing it of doubts. “Okay, I might be wrong, but I really think she has potential. I need all of you to help me with this mission!”

“You mean this whole ‘friendship with a machine’ thing?” Rainbow Dash asked, rolling her eyes again. “Yeah, thanks but no thanks. I’ve already seen it try to make friends with Fluttershy.”

Fluttershy shuddered. “I think making friends with it once was enough for me. Sorry, Twilight.”

The others were likewise reluctant to volunteer to help.

“You mean, that none of you will help me?" She glanced around in open-mouthed disbelief before her eyes hardened. "I thought this was important to all of us! Spreading friendship everywhere!”

“Maybe friendship is like frosting,” Pinkie wondered aloud, tapping her chin. “You want to spread it over everything because it's so yummy, and usually it’s great! But you wouldn’t put it on pickles--” this got a collective look of disgust from the others “--so maybe in the same way, friendship doesn’t really work well with automatons!” She had a smile when she finished her reasoning, but frowned when she saw that this disheartened Twilight even further. “Um, sorry Twilight.”

“But how can I face Princess Celestia when she asks me about all this? I sent her a letter this morning explaining what happened in more detail, and she’s bound to reply sooner or later! I’ll have to tell her that none of my friends believe in my goal of teaching Turing Test to be friends!”

They all looked a little guilty at that, each one unable to meet her gaze, but Applejack sighed and finally broke her silence. “Sugarcube, ya know we would do just about anything for ya. And that includes tryin’ to teach that contraption how to act normal. But bein’ friends with a machine… I just don’t know if I can do that. But it reminds me of somethin’ Granny Smith always said to me. She said ‘Applejack, I know I ask a lot from ya sometimes, but I would never ask anypony to do somethin’ I wasn’t willin’ to do myself.’ I guess what I’m sayin’ is that we might be more willin’ to make friends with Two Ring Test if you were willing to try it yerself. So… are ya really friends with that thing?”

“I… I guess not,” Twilight said. But then she got a bold look in her eyes and got to her feet. “But I understand what you mean! You’re right, Applejack! Starting today, I’m going to try to make friends with Turing Test! And I know just where to start!”

And without another word, she spread her wings and took to the skies, leaving the rest of them behind.

They all looked to each other. “So… what do you all think?” Rarity asked.

“I think she’s bound to be disappointed,” Applejack replied, adjusting her hat.

Rainbow Dash yawned, stretching her wings. “I think she’ll give up in a few days and everything can go back to normal!”

“I think Twilight didn’t finish her soup before she left,” Pinkie added leaping across the table, “and that means it’s mine now!” She snatched up the bowl and gulped it down.

“I wonder, what is she going to do to try to make friends with it?” Fluttershy asked as she smoothed her mane down. “I hope she’ll be all right…”

***

“Turing Test?” Twilight called, entering the castle. “I’m home! Are you there?”

“She’s in here with me, Twilight!” Spike hollered from down the hall. She followed the sound of his voice and stopped by a door where she heard a curious sound she couldn’t identify.

This is the room where we repaired her, she thought. Why are they back in there?

She opened the door and saw Turing Test sitting in the middle of the room. A wire ran from an open compartment on her back and it ran over to a device Spike was cranking. “Oh, you’re using the manual generator Mr. Vanderbull gave us to recharge Turing Test?” she asked.

“Yup! She said she was starting to run a little low on power and it might be a good idea to recharge while you and the others were at lunch,” he said. “She must have used a lot of power playing catch. Of course, she's also been helping me clean up the castle. It sure takes a long time, but with help it went a lot faster!”

“That is correct,” Turing Test said. “With no standing orders, it seemed logical to assist your slave with his duties.”

They both froze and gawked at her.

“You have ceased the charging process, Spike the Dragon. Power is at 92%. Is this sufficient, Twilight Sparkle?”

“What did you say?!” Twilight demanded, flabbergasted at what she’d just said.

“Please specify your query. Which part of the prior statement should I repeat?”

“I’m not a ‘slave!’” Spike yelled indignantly, balling his fists and standing ramrod straight before her.

Turing Test looked down at him. “You perform tasks and labor for the benefit of our mutual end user without monetary compensation. Is the term ‘slave’ incorrect?”

“It most certainly is!” Twilight shouted. “Spike is my assistant and what’s more he’s my friend!”

“More information required. Please specify a difference.”

“Jeez, Turing Test, for being the smartest machine I’ve ever met,” Spike began, walking over to Twilight, “you sure can be dense sometimes. Look, I’ve known Twilight all my life and I’m here because I want to be here!” He hugged Twilight affectionately, laying his head against her. “Besides, I could leave if I really wanted to. I just don’t want to!”

Turing Test watched the two of them, cocking her head to the side, ears twitching. “Understood. Spike the Dragon is not a slave.”

Twilight smiled. “I’m glad you understand. And thank you for explaining it to her, Spike.” She sighed, calming herself down. I have to learn to be patient and not lose my temper when she says things like that, she told herself. She doesn’t mean anything by it. She doesn’t know any better.

Spike disconnected the wires from the automaton’s back and she stood up. “Twilight Sparkle, I require more information on this subject. Is it then correct to say that Turing Test is a slave?”

“Oh!” Twilight was taken aback by the question. “Um… no, that’s not exactly correct either.”

“The terms ‘slave’ and ‘assistant’ may require further clarification. Spike the Dragon mentioned that he is your ‘friend’ and therefore is not a slave. As my Primary Directive is ‘make friends,’ this information may become useful.”

Twilight smiled. “You really are learning, aren’t you?”

“Correct,” she replied. “I am constantly updating my databanks with new information.”

Amazing, Twilight thought, practically swelling with appreciation.

“Um, Twilight?” Spike asked. “Do you want Turing and I to get back to cleaning?”

“Actually, I need to work on some things with her,” she said. “But why don’t you relax for now? The castle looks great and I know you have some comics you wanted to read.”

“Oh, great! Thanks, Twilight!” And with that, he ran off to find his latest issues.

Twilight turned her attention back to the automaton. “And now, Turing Test, I want you to come with me to the library. I have something important to teach you, but first we need to set some ground rules.”

***

Twilight climbed the ladder to reach a book near the top of the shelf. She still hadn’t completely filled her library, but it was already almost as full as the Golden Oak Library had been. Princess Celestia had been incredibly helpful with providing her with books, and there had been several others she’d salvaged from Golden Oak, and even some of Ponyville’s citizens had donated books in gratitude. One of the smaller and less complete sections, however, was the science fiction section. It held a few choice books like Frankenstallion, The Invisible Mare, and Logan’s Gallop. But she finally found a particular book and levitated it as she stepped down.

“Turing Test, this is a book called I, Automaton by Isaac Asiteague,” she said, showing it to her. “I admit, it's been a long time since I read it, but the point is that ponies have imagined machines like you that can act on their own and communicate. However, you might be the very first one to actually exist. I think it would be good to learn from fiction and apply the lessons to reality. Does that make sense to you?”

Turing Test was quiet for a moment, but then replied “It seems possible that imagined solutions to previously hypothetical problems could be applicable once those problems are no longer hypothetical.”

“Exactly! And that’s… that’s why I have to ask you about last night when we first, um, ‘woke you up.’”

“You refer to my reactivation?”

“Yes, that’s what I mean.” She took a deep breath. “When you thought you might be in danger, you went into a kind of self-defense mode. Do you remember?”

“That event is in my memory.”

“Well, if you truly thought you were in danger, what would you have done?”

“It is part of my default programming to defend myself.”

“So, if my friends had seemed dangerous, you would have attacked them?”

“Affirmative. I was prepared to engage any hostile targets.”

Twilight sighed. “Well, listen: I want you to be able to protect yourself, of course, but under no circumstances are you to ever, ever hurt anypony." She stepped forward, looking her in the eyes. "I mean that. I need you to follow a set of guidelines to keep other ponies safe and to keep you safe as well. I can't allow you to go attacking organic beings. So here is a set of rules. I’m going to read them off to you and if you have any questions, I’ll try to clarify them. Okay?”

“Acknowledged.”

“Then, Turing Test, I present to you the Three Laws of Automata.” She opened the book and began reading from a section of it. “Ahem:
‘First: an automaton may not injure a pony or, through inaction, allow a pony to come to harm. Second, an automaton must obey the orders given to it by ponies, except where such orders would conflict with the First Law. Third, an automaton must protect its own existence as long as such protection does not conflict with the First or Second Law.’” She shut the book, loudly. “And there you go! Do you understand?”

“Further information required,” she answered. “Am I to obey all ponies who give me orders?”

“No, it would be bad if you had to do everything anypony told you to do,” Twilight said. She tapped her chin. “Hmm. I'd say that as your, um, ‘end user,’ I would like you to obey my orders absolutely, but you can determine for yourself if other ponies’ orders are suitable to be followed. As long as it doesn’t conflict with what I’ve asked from you or one of the other Laws, you can determine if the order is okay to follow.”

“Further query: does the Third Law mean that I may inflict no harm on anypony even in the case that may lead to severe damage or my destruction?”

“I suppose if it’s just a minor injury like a cut or bruise, that’s one thing, but you may not cause any worse injury than that. Instead, you should try to escape if you are in a dangerous situation. Can you do that?”

“Affirmative. For maximum efficiency, I will adapt these conditions into my default program.” Her eyes shrank down as the electrical hum inside her grew in pitch. A moment later, it subsided and her eyes returned to normal. "Program update complete."

“Glad we got that taken care of,” Twilight said, sighing with relief as she put the book away. She smiled, already feeling much better. With these new laws in place, Turing Test should be much safer to be around and hopefully my friends should be less afraid of her.

“Now, on to the next order of business," Twilight continued. "This morning I noticed you were picking up and squeezing oranges with your hooves and carrying things physically instead of lifting them with magic. But I know you have magic capability. Is there a reason why you haven't been using it?”

“Magical systems are functional,” she answered. “However, no information regarding the casting of spells was found in my memory. It was likely lost in the same incident that damaged me prior to my reactivation. I am incapable of using magic without such data.”

“Well then, Turing Test, I think it’s time for a crash course!” Twilight giddily clapped her hooves together. “Today, I’m going to teach you how to use magic!”

***

Twilight Sparkle and Turing Test were both sitting behind the castle nearby the lake. It seemed better to practice outside instead of risking a mishap inside that might break something, but practicing on the far side of the castle should also keep their work a bit more private. And with her new goal in mind, Twilight took a step forward and spread her wings to address her newest pupil.

“Nopony knows who first discovered magic or when unicorns first began to wield its power directly. But from ancient times, wizards, sorcerers, and any number of mages have sought ways of using it to their advantage. We have learned that magic is all around us, fueled by nature, the sun and moon, and of course the greatest magic of all, which comes from within us: the magic of friendship! And starting today, Turing Test, you will begin learning how to master your magic to the best of your ability and join the noble ranks of magic users across the land and throughout history!”

Twilight finished this speech with a great flourish and a burst of magic from her own horn, thinking it rather impressive.

“That is an accurate summary,” Turing Test commented.

Twilight made a sour face and lowered her head. “Ugh… right. Automaton. You don’t exactly do ‘enthusiasm,’ do you?”

“Query regarding emotions is still inconclusive. Enthusiasm may be considered an emotional response, therefore--”

“Okay, okay, sheesh!” Twilight shouted, waving her hooves. “Look, never mind that. Let’s just focus on the basics.”

Before the both of them was a broom. Twilight figured that if it had been good enough to help train Sweetie Belle, then it was good enough to train an automaton.

“All right. First off, we’re going to try some basic levitation.”

“Understood. Engaging U-Mode.”

The sound of gears turning came from her and with a metallic scraping sound, a panel in her forehead slid open and the telescopic horn extended. The slight hum of electricity changed pitch.

“Ooh, I can’t wait to see you take those first wobbly steps into magic!” Twilight bubbled, gently hopping up and down. “Now, look at the broom, and just try to focus your attention on it. You may feel a little warmth on your horn and a welling of energy within you. Try to focus that energy to surround the broom and try to make it rise into the air.”

Turing Test was totally motionless, and so was the broom.

“Something wrong, Turing?” Twilight asked.

“Your descriptions involve several tactile sensations I am incapable of perceiving in the same manner as biological creatures.”

“I… wait, you mean you can’t feel things?" She blinked. "Anything?”

“Clarifying: I am capable of detecting pressure on my hull, changes in temperature, and can detect the texture of an object,” Turing Test explained. “However, a ‘welling of energy’ or ‘warmth’ in my horn would not be possible, as my physical structure differs significantly from a biological pony.”

“I guess that makes sense, but…" She frowned, stepping closer to her. "Do you mean you can’t be, say, in pain? Or comfortable?”

“Correct. I lack that ability.”

Twilight lowered her head. "That's actually rather sad, Turing."

Turing cocked her head to the side. "I do not require tactile sensation to function."

“Maybe not," Twilight sighed, shaking her head, "but without being able to feel your magic, well, then this is going to be much harder than I thought.”

“I have a possible solution to the problem, Twilight Sparkle.”

“Oh?” she asked, still reeling somewhat from the new information. How can I teach a pony to be friends when she can’t even enjoy a warm summer day or a cool breeze? Heck, she doesn’t seem to enjoy anything! Out loud she simply said, “Go ahead, let’s hear your idea.”

“I am capable of detecting magical energies through my visual scanners. If you perform the spell, I can extrapolate the data from observation and attempt to replicate it.”

Twilight considered this. It was worth a shot. After all, Rainbow Dash had taught her that there were often many ways to learn something. Maybe this was how Turing Test learned best.

“Okay, Turing, watch me carefully,” Twilight said. She focused on the broom and lifted it easily, even turning it around 360 degrees before setting it gently onto the ground.

“Data recorded. Extrapolating.”

“I know it might take a while, Turing Test, but I think you will--” And then she froze as she watched Turing Test’s horn glow with goldenrod-colored magic and then lift the broom and turn it 360 degrees and then set it down, just as Twilight had done.

“Objective complete.”

She gawked, jaw dropping open. “That… how… wow. So much for wobbly steps. You got that in just one try!” She wasn’t sure how the machine had managed to cast the spell successfully on the very first try, but it did give her confidence to continue her lessons. “Well, all right, shall we move onto the next lesson?”

“I am ready, Twilight Sparkle.”

Twilight pointed to a large rock near the lakeside, a round speckled granite boulder half a meter in height. “Now that you’ve levitated something small, let’s try something heavier. This will require much greater precision and force, but I think a machine like you should be capable. This often takes a lot more time and practice to get right, but if keep at it, you should be able to lift it. Like this!”

Twilight’s magenta-colored magic aura enveloped the stone and, with a slight change in her expression as she exerted herself, she levitated it about 20 feet in the air. She then let it come crashing down to the earth where it made enough of an impact to slightly disturb the placid water of the lake.

“There, you see?” Twilight said, gesturing to it with her hoof.

“Understood.” And then with no apparent effort at all, Turing Test levitated the rock to the same height and likewise dropped it to the ground.

“Objective complete.”

Twilight blinked. “That’s… that’s impossible!” She'd expected it to move slightly, but to perfectly replicate her levitation... “Turing Test, a first-time caster shouldn’t be able to lift something that heavy without practice!”

“The data was simple to analyze and the effect was therefore simple to replicate.”

“Well, since you’re such a fast learner, let’s try an even tougher one!” Twilight exclaimed, mischieviously rubbing her hooves together. “Check this out!”

With a toss of her hair, she focused her magic to create a three-dimensional image of her own cutie mark and let it hang in the air. “Illusion magic, manipulation of light, and just a little bit of artistic flare thrown in for good measure!” The image faded, leaving a few sparkles of energy in the air as it vanished.

“Extrapolating data,” Turing Test said. And sure enough without another moment’s hesitation, she likewise created a three-dimensional image of Twilight’s cutie mark. “Objective complete.”

“I don’t believe this!” Twilight shouted, stomping her hoof. “That’s very advanced magic! It takes practice and study! It took me years to make images like that! You can't just learn it after one viewing!"

"Data indicates otherwise."

Twilight grit her teeth. "Fine, let’s just jump straight to an expert spell!”

Twilight turned back to the large rock they’d just levitated and she fired a beam of concussive energy right at it, blowing a hole into the stone.

“Ha! Offensive spells!” she laughed haughtily, tossing her head back and crossing one leg in front of the other. “Even in Canterlot, the number of unicorns who can do that is--”

Another zap was heard and a bolt of goldenrod energy shot by her and a second hole was blown into the rock.

“Objective--”

“No! Don’t even say it!" Twilight groaned. "Fine, I guess automata like yourself don’t need to practice and work hard! You can just get it right without bothering yourself!” she shouted, exasperated with Turing Test’s nonchalant replication of her hard-won spells. “I don’t see why I should even bother since you can obviously figure this out on your own!” And with that, she teleported from where she stood right back into her bedroom inside the castle.

A second later, Turing Test also teleported directly into Twilight’s room. “Objective complete.”

“Turing Test, the lesson is over! Just… I don’t know, since you’re such a quick learner, go read books in the library! I want to be alone!”

“Understood, Twilight Sparkle,” she said. “Resuming neutral mode,” she added, letting her horn retract as she walked out of the room. "I will be in the library until you have need of me."

Twilight flopped down on the bed, punching her pillow in frustration. That machine… she’s making a mockery of all the hard work I put into learning those spells! How could I ever be friends with her? How could I have even thought I could ever be friends with her?!

***

Spike was relaxing on a couch in the library reading his comic when the door opened. He raised his head and saw, to his surprise, that Turing Test had entered alone, her metallic hooves clanking out their usual steady rhythm as she walked in.

“Turing?” he asked, lowering his comic book. “What are you doing here?”

“Twilight Sparkle ordered me to read books in the library.” She walked to the center of the room.

Spike hefted himself off the couch and smiled as he walked over to her. “Which ones? Maybe I could help you find them.”

Turing Test looked around the room. “Unspecified.”

Spike scratched his head with one claw. “Well, I guess it's your call then. What kinds of things interest you?”

She looked at him. “Nothing.”

Spike heaved a sigh. “Oh come on! There must be something important you need to know more about!”

Turing Test was quiet for a moment, her head turning slightly as she scanned the various shelves. “Primary Directive ‘make friends’ involves many subjects. I must research any and all topics that would facilitate this goal.”

Spike chuckled. “You sound a little bit like Twilight, especially before she came to Ponyville. Back then, she thought she could solve any problem just by looking in a book.”

Her ears twitched and she paused in her scan of the room. “You believe research would serve no purpose?”

“Nnnno, that’s not it. I just mean Twilight realized that sometimes you have to figure out things by trying them for yourself.”

Turing Test stared at him for a moment, apparently considering his words. He squirmed a little under her unblinking gaze, but eventually she said “Your summation seems logical. I will collect data from these books and then attempt an evaluation based on continued effort.”

“Uh, great! You do that!” He watched as she went to a nearby bookshelf and opened a book. Curiously, though, she didn’t begin reading, but appeared to merely flip through the book, from start to finish, rapidly letting all the pages turn. She then closed the book and moved on to the next one and did the same.

I guess she didn’t think it was something she wanted to read, he thought. Oh well, back to my own book!

***

An hour later, Twilight was still lying in bed with her own book, a mystery novel, but she was having a hard time concentrating on the story.

Maybe I shouldn’t have been so angry, she said to herself. I told myself earlier that I needed to be patient, but then I blew up at her. I might have really hurt her feel...ings… Oh, right.

She sighed, realizing once again that Turing Test didn’t have feelings, or at least didn’t appear to have them. But that also meant that the automaton was not showing off or being smug or anything like that. She couldn’t make a mockery of sorcery because she probably had no concept of what “mocking” something involved.

“What do I do?” she asked herself aloud. “There has to be something I can do to connect with her, something to get through all that cold calculation...”

“Twilight! Twilight!”

She raised her head, hearing Spike calling for her out in the hallway. She instantly teleported outside her room to find him.

“Spike? What is it, what’s wrong?”

“It’s Turing Test!” He pointed down the hall, his eyes wide and darting back to her. “She’s… I don’t know, something’s wrong with her!”

“What?” She stiffened. “Where is she?”

“The library!”

She nodded and focused her magic. She then teleported them both directly back to the library. When they arrived, they both saw Turing Test sitting in the center of the large room. She was making more noise than usual, especially for sitting still, and the sound of something clicking and a noticeably loud, high-pitched electrical whine were audible. Not only that, her eyes, normally large and glowing, had narrowed to dim pinpricks, leaving them mostly black. They almost looked like dilated pupils on a normal pony, as if she had gone catatonic.

“Turing Test?” Twilight asked uncertainly. There was no response, so she decided to try again. “Turing? Turing Test? Yoohoo!” She waved her hoof in front of the automaton’s face. Nothing.

“She’s been like this for a few minutes, I think!” Spike said, biting his claws.

“You 'think'?” Twilight asked.

“Yeah, she was just flipping through the books for the last hour, and then things got quiet. I was about to take a nap, but then I wondered what she was doing, so I got up and saw her like this!”

They both regarded the unmoving automaton with uncertainty. “What could have happened to her?” Twilight asked quietly. She frowned.

Spike swallowed, looking up at her. “Is she… broken?”

As if in answer to his question, Turing Test’s eyes went back to their normal size and the electrical whine reduced in pitch to its normal soft hum. She turned her head to them both.

“Greetings, Twilight Sparkle and Spike the Dragon. Are you both well?”

“That’s what we should be asking you!” Twilight exclaimed. “What were you doing just now? We thought something was wrong with you. You wouldn’t respond to us. We didn’t know if you could see or hear us!”

“I apologize for the inconvenience,” she said, rising to her hooves. “I completed my scan of the library and was compiling the data, categorizing it by subject and cross-referencing it, in order to increase my knowledge and more cohesively relate to biological lifeforms.”

“Come again?” Spike asked, crossing his arms.

“Clarifying: I reasoned that I could relate to ponies more capably by researching more about them and comparing the data to my own experiences.”

“I think she’s saying she wants to learn to get along with us better,” Twilight explained.

“Correct.”

“Wait a minute,” Spike began, “I just saw you flipping through the books. I thought you were just skimming them. You mean you were actually reading them?!”

“My visual sensors were able to capture the image of each page and record it. However, actually processing the data for general comprehension required me to shut down higher functions and divert power to compiling it. This is what I was doing when you found me.”

“That’s amazing!” Spike exclaimed. “You only flipped through those books for about 10 or 20 seconds each!”

Twilight was taken aback. She blinked at her several times before she finally managed to gasp, “You can read a book that quickly?”

“Affirmative.” She paused. “Yes. I can. All books in the library have been scanned.”

Twilight gawked, stunned by this information, but then she felt something slip against her side and noticed she had unconsciously tucked the mystery novel she’d been reading under her left wing and it had come loose. Curious, she levitated it over to Turing Test. “Show me, please. Read this.”

Turing Test took the book in her hooves and let the pages flip before her eyes, from start to finish. She then handed it back to Twilight. “Analyzing…” she intoned. “Complete.” The whole process had taken less than 15 seconds.

“Already? Wow! That’s--”

“The valet did it.”

Making a face, Twilight tossed the book aside. “Thanks, Turing, that’s… that’s just great.” Then a thought occurred to her and she narrowed her eyes. “Wait a minute, you just flipped through that book using your hooves. Why didn’t you hold it and turn the pages with magic?”

“I lack that ability.”

“Wait, what?” Twilight shook her head and pointed a hoof at her. “No you don’t! I taught you how to levitate things outside and now you can even teleport! You mastered a huge amount of magic in less than 5 minutes! Levitating a book should be nothing!”

“That statement is inaccurate,” she replied. “You taught me only five spells in total. I have learned to levitate a broom and a large rock, to make an image of your cutie mark, to fire a concussive blast into a rock, and to teleport to your bedroom.”

Twilight gawked at her. “You mean… are you saying that, if I asked you to, you couldn’t lift anything else or teleport to any other place or create an image of something else?”

“Correct. I copied your exact magical manipulation for those situations and only those situations. I lack the data to do more.”

“But what about the spell books in the library? Surely you learned something from those!”

“Their information is relevant to biological lifeforms. As an automaton, I was unable to properly adapt the information for my own use.”

Twilight put her hoof to her face. “Ugh… well, so much for magic. This was all a huge waste of our time.” She turned to go, utterly exasperated. She was at the door when she heard Turing Test's hooves as she came up behind her and she spoke again.

“Twilight Sparkle. Do not give up.”

She froze and turned around. “W-what did you say?”

Turing was staring at her and leaning slightly forward. “Research on physical communication and facial expression has enabled me to attempt interpretation of your emotional state. You were frustrated with my apparent expedient mastery of all magic which bypassed normal effort, when in fact I had only gained a limited set of skills. And now you feel as though instructing me was an inefficient use of time. However, I am capable of learning and my only drive is to satisfy my directives. That includes your satisfaction with me. I will never cease this function as long as I am operational, but I require your assistance and input to advance.”

“So, you're saying…?”

“I am requesting that you not give up on me. Help me, Twilight Sparkle.” She paused. “Please.”

Twilight blinked. Please? she thought. Wow.

“I… I suppose…” She smiled. “Oh, all right. Let’s try it again. Meet me outside, Turing Test. I think I know how to fix this.”

***

They were outside once again, back by the lakeside. This time, Twilight had brought along something different.

“Okay, Turing Test,” she began, setting the object on the ground before her, “this is an empty flowerpot. Your goal is simple. Levitate it and hold it in the air for five seconds.”

“Engaging U-Mode,” she said, once again extending her metallic horn. “Please demonstrate the spell.”

Twilight smirked. “Not this time, Turing. You will have to try it on your own.”

“Unable to comply without input.”

“Listen Turing,” Twilight said, narrowing her eyes, “I can’t show you how to levitate everything in existence. That’s not possible. And even though you may not cast magic exactly like a typical unicorn does, that doesn’t mean you can’t learn in your own way. Why don’t you try to take the data you got from levitating the broom and try it here?”

“The attempt will not be suited for the item in question. It will fail.”

“So?” Twilight asked, shrugging her shoulders. “When you fail, try it again. And again. And again," she said, stomping her hoof on the ground, "until you master it.”

“That is inefficient.”

“No, it isn’t. Learning how to cast magic for yourself will have a big payoff because it will let you figure out how to lift lots of things. Building on experience is a great way to learn. You’ve already done it today by comparing your past experiences with me to what you learned in those books. So give it a try and remember that sometimes even failure can be a good teacher.”

Turing Test cocked her head, apparently considering this. Then she said, “Reviewing data. Extrapolating. Magic levels, weight of object. Estimating magical force required.”

She turned to the flowerpot and her horn again began to glow. The flowerpot moved slightly but then turned over, rolling slightly on the ground.

“Recalculating.”

“Try to encompass it totally with your magic instead of a little at a time.”

“Understood. Adjusting magic levels.”

She made another attempt, but it only rolled away again.

“Recalculating.”

This went on longer than Twilight would have expected, since Turing Test had levitated the broom so quickly the last time. Twenty minutes (and a great many utterances of the word “recalculating”) went by and Twilight just stood there patiently watching attempt after attempt, each one getting slightly better results until…

“...three...four...five seconds! You did it!” Twilight exclaimed, practically jumping for joy.

The flowerpot was there, hanging in the air, levitated by Turing Test’s magic for the required five seconds. Not only that, she even managed to gently set it back on the ground right-side up.

“Objective complete.”

“Congratulations, Turing!” Twilight exclaimed, raising her hoof triumphantly. “You’ve just completed your first magic spell that you learned for yourself! I'm so happy for you!”

Turing Test was quiet for a moment, but then she looked at the flowerpot again, walking over to it and peering down at it.

“Objective complete,” she repeated.

Twilight raised an eyebrow. “Um… yes?”

Then she raised her head and her ears began to move rapidly in a quick flapping motion, making little squeaking noises on their hinges all the while.

“Achievement is satisfactory.”

“Yes, I am very satisfied, Turing,” Twilight said, shaking her head, amused at the automaton’s apparent need to state the obvious.

Turing Test turned to her. “This action is satisfactory to Twilight Sparkle,” she said. “This action. This action is satisfactory to me.”

Twilight blinked. “W-wait a minute…” she said breathlessly, rushing to her side. “Turing are you saying that you… are you…?”

“A strange reaction. My cognitive process has acknowledged this achievement as special somehow. It is looping. Something differentiates this from prior successes. Analyzing…”

Twilight didn’t know what was going on, but it was very different from anything else that had happened before.

“Update. Prior query answered.”

“Prior query?” Twilight asked. She tilted her head. “What query? I didn’t ask you anything.”

“Prior query by Twilight Sparkle: ‘Is it possible for you to have emotions?’ has new data.” Turing Test took a step closer. “System analysis reveals a possible emotional response. Scan indicates I am experiencing what can be called ‘gratification.’”

“What?!” Twilight gasped. “Oh my gosh, are you sure?!”

Turing raised her head, her ears still twitching. “Inconclusive. More testing may be required.” Turing Test looked down at the flowerpot, then back to Twilight. “May I practice levitating other things?”

Twilight smiled broadly. “Yes, of course! Let’s go back inside and practice!”

“Acknowledged. Thank you, Twilight Sparkle.”

“Sure thing.”

“Thank you, Twilight Sparkle.”

Twilight chuckled. “You’re welcome, Turing Test.”

“Thank you, Twilight Sparkle.”

“Okay, okay!” she laughed, raising a hoof. “I’m thanked, you can stop!”

“In previously scanned books, the expression ‘I can’t thank you enough’ occurs with regularity." She stopped in front of her. "Your assistance in achieving this sensation is to be valued. I am attempting to show the proper amount of gratitude for your assistance.”

Twilight smiled, putting her hoof to her chest. “You’re there,” she said gently.

***

A half-hour later, Twilight was standing by in the dining room watching Turing Test carefully lift one thing after another. She was now getting most of them on the first try, apparently judging their size, weight, texture, flexibility, and other factors well enough to do so. She was certainly learning faster than a foal usually would, even though she was not yet at the same level as an adult unicorn would be.

Twilight heard the door open behind her and turned to see Spike entering. His eyes bulged when he saw Turing Test levitating a vase. “Whoa, is everything okay?”

“Everything’s fine, Spike,” she assured him. “Turing’s just getting in some magic practice.”

“I see,” he said. He grinned as she put down the vase and lifted a platter. “Not bad!”

Turing Test set down the decorative platter she was levitating and turned to face Spike. “Spike the Dragon, your suggestion of learning through experience in addition to the similar advice of Twilight Sparkle proved useful. Thank you, Spike the Dragon.” She then went back to trying to levitate things, starting with each of the chairs.

Spike's smile grew and he looked up at Twilight. “Say, is it just me, or does she seem… I dunno… nicer?” he asked.

“Well, she’s still a little different… okay, very different from most ponies, but, yeah, she is getting better,” Twilight replied.

“It’s almost time to make dinner,” Spike said. “I could use Turing’s help, actually, especially now that she can use magic.”

Turing Test set down what she was levitating at the mention of her name and trotted over. “Understood. I am ready to assist in the preparation of a meal for Twilight Sparkle and Spike the Dragon.”

“I’ll help too,” Twilight said. “After all, cooking is more fun,” she added, looking from Spike and then to Turing Test, “when you do it with your friends.”

***

“...And the Cloudsdale Weather Team should have their report on the effects of their weather patterns at the end of the week, Your Majesty,” Raven said. She adjusted her black spectacles as she raised her head from the clipboard. She had been dutifully following Princess Celestia through the halls of Canterlot Castle as they ran through the last few things on her schedule for the week. Being the aide for the ruler of a country was a busy job, but Celestia was an easy enough boss under the circumstances and was as capable of handling her many responsibilities as Raven was at scheduling and arranging them.

However, she quickly noticed that Celestia was not listening and in fact had stepped out onto a veranda on the left side of the hallway. She appeared to be looking out over the valley far below, now bathed in the soft light of sunset.

“Your Majesty?” Raven asked.

“Hm? Oh, yes. I apologize,” Celestia said, offering her an apologetic smile. “Excellent work as usual, Raven. Please see to it that I receive the report as soon as possible once it’s done.”

“Of course.” She waited for Celestia to continue down the hallway, but she lingered at the veranda, still fixated on something.

“I beg your pardon, Your Majesty,” Raven said clearing her throat, “but I don’t believe you’ve exactly been yourself today, ever since you received the morning news… does this have something to do with Princess Twilight’s latest, ah, experiment?”

“You know me quite well, Raven,” the Princess replied. She continued to smile, but looking down at Ponyville, in particular the tall castle that now graced the village, that smile began to falter and diminish. “I had a great deal to do today and though Princess Twilight’s letter helped to clarify the recent events, I must admit that I am worried and it has been distracting me.”

“I see. How can I help?”

Celestia said nothing at first, apparently weighing her options. “Raven, please cancel tomorrow morning’s activities.”

“That should be doable, Your Highness. There are no dignitaries visiting, so any other business can be done in the afternoon or moved to later in the week.”

“Excellent.” She sighed. “I trust Twilight Sparkle’s judgment, and she is no longer a filly, but the wonderfully capable mare who has earned the esteemed title she now bears. However…”

Hearing Celestia trail off, Raven considered prompting her with a question, but resisted the urge so Celestia could speak when she chose to do so.

Finally, she spoke up. “However… this latest experiment of hers could be the start of something much larger and I fear it could be dangerous for all my subjects, starting with Princess Twilight. Her natural curiosity may lead her astray this time. Tomorrow, I will go to her and tell her not to be fooled: that mechanical beast is no friend of hers. I must convince Twilight that she’s let something terrible into her home.”

To be continued...

Electric Ladyland, Part 1

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“This way, Turing!” Twilight called, glancing back at the robot over her shoulder. “I want to stop by the traveling bookseller before the good stuff gets snapped up!”

“Understood.”

The two of them were in the outdoor market in Ponyville. Twilight decided to pick up a few odds and ends, especially since she wanted to see if she could find more books about Eastern unicorns. The books she had were severely lacking information on the subject. Of course, there were a few other things she wanted to get while she was out, and even a serious pony like Twilight enjoyed shopping. Spike was back at the castle cleaning up the room where they’d repaired Turing Test and Twilight decided that since her automaton companion had strength to spare, she could be of great help if she decided to splurge on books.

Twilight reached the bookseller’s tent and gleefully took in the sight of all the new and antique books for sale. A moment later, Turing Test arrived, saddlebags already bulging with the knick-knacks Twilight had purchased.

“Ooh, look at this one! And this one!” Twilight gushed examining first one book, then another. “Oh, they all look so good!”

“Ya like ‘em, eh?” said the mare who was running the tent. “I’m sure I could cut a discount for one of my best customers, TwiliiiiohsweetCelestiawhatisthat?!”

Twilight turned to see the bookseller pointing at Turing Test. She sighed. This had been happening all morning.

“I am an independently functional automaton residing with and currently assisting my end user, Twilight Sparkle,” Turing Test said to the bookseller. “I am designated as ‘Turing Test.’ Please identify yourself.”

“Wh-what?” the bookseller stammered.

“Repeating: I am an independently functional automaton--”

“Turing, enough, I’ll talk to the salesponies,” Twilight said, raising a hoof and cutting her off.

“Understood, Twilight Sparkle.”

Twilight did her best to explain what had been happening. Apparently the bookseller, with all her moving from town to town, had not heard the news about Twilight taking on the task of teaching an automaton friendship. Her explanation didn't seem to allay any concerns, however, as the poor mare kept glancing over at Turing and biting her lip.

“Listen, I know she’s a little, um, odd-looking,” Twilight said, finishing her explanation, “but she’s not dangerous. She’s just helping me shop, that’s all!”

“Well… wait, why is it flipping through the books?”

Twilight turned and saw Turing scanning a book, this time holding it up before her with magic.

“Turing Test, what are you doing?!”

“I am scanning this volume. Information copied and stored.”

“Turing, you can’t just read the entire book without buying it!”

“I merely complied with your command, Twilight Sparkle. When we arrived, you said 'Ooh, look at this one! And this one!' Now I have looked at them.”

Twilight flinched, not only because of Turing Test taking her too literally again, but also because she had momentarily mimicked Twilight’s voice perfectly, except that it had the same electronic distortion present in her own voice. The effect was a little disturbing, to say the least.

“Hooboy,” Twilight groaned, putting her hoof to her face.

The salespony cleared her throat, getting Twilight's attention. “Um, not to be rude or anything, Twilight,” she said, finding her voice again, “but you said it yourself. You can’t read the entire book without paying for it.” She looked at her pointedly.

“But that's..." Twilight sighed. "Right, right, of course,” she said, levitating the money for the books to the seller. “Let’s go, Turing. I don’t see any books on Eastern unicorns anyway.”

“Understood,” Turing said, levitating the purchased books into her saddlebags. She then turned to the bookseller, causing her to take a few steps back. “Etiquette indicates you be thanked for this transaction. Thank you. You will be given 10 seconds to acknowledge gratitude.”

“Ten seconds to... what?!” the seller cried.

“Turing!" Twilight called sharply. "Stop that and come here!”

“Countdown aborted. I will follow, Twilight Sparkle.”

Twilight let Turing Test catch up to her as they exited the tent and moved on down the road. Tents and stalls were everywhere with ponies selling their wares. It was a busy market day and that meant the selection was quite varied. Antiques, records, dolls, books, and of course the usual produce and other foods were all on display. The citizens of Ponyville were out in full force as well, and Twilight was acutely aware that she and Turing were likewise “on display."

“Unbelievable,” Twilight groaned, tossing her head back. “I lost count of all the vendors that asked me what you were, Turing Test.”

“The number is seven. Eight if you count the asparagus vendor who yelled something unintelligible and fled the scene. I estimate a 28% chance that his outburst was meant as an inquiry.”

“Yes, thank you, Turing.”

“However, the odds of it being an exclamation of fear, an epithet, or the result of a mental disorder largely outweighs that possibility.”

Twilight narrowed her eyes. “Yes, thank you, Turing,” she said again, a little louder this time.

The two of them walked on in silence a bit further. Twilight tried her best to ignore the fact that everypony was staring at them, but she supposed the gawkers and rubber-neckers were unavoidable. She had hoped that taking Turing Test out to the market would be a good way to casually introduce her to the public, but it was rapidly becoming a spectacle and everywhere they went, things got quiet as ponies stopped what they were doing and stared and began to whisper to each other.

Turing Test was hard to miss, of course. A mechanical pony (accompanying an alicorn, no less) was not something one saw every day. Nopony in a century had seen something quite like Turing, and in truth, until now there hadn’t really been anything truly like her at all. It wasn’t that Twilight blamed them, but she’d hoped their reaction would be awe or curiosity at least.

Instead, the two just walked down a corridor of eyes filled with suspicion and fear.

“Twilight!” a chorus of voices suddenly exclaimed in unison.

She turned to see Applebloom, Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo, along with a few other children, galloping over to her.

“Oh, hello!” she said, greeting them with a smile. However, they also stopped a slight distance from the pair of them and they all eyed Turing Test with a range of reactions. “Um, can I help you all with anything?” she asked.

“Well,” Applebloom began, apparently serving as the spokespony for the group, “I asked Applejack about that metal pony us Crusaders found and she told me to just forget about it…”

Twilight resisted the urge to roll her eyes. I guess Applejack still wants nothing to do with Turing Test.

“...but Featherweight here and a bunch of other kids saw the newspaper yesterday and we saw the picture, so we found out y’all fixed it! And there she is!”

Applebloom pointed to Turing Test and the other kids all said “Oooh!” excitedly.

Turing Test took a step forward, looking down at the group of foals, causing them to momentarily step back. “Biological lifeforms are smaller than average. Twilight Sparkle, is it correct to identify these individuals as juveniles?”

“Yes, Turing Test, they’re children,” Twilight replied. “This is Applebloom, Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo. Um, and their friends…?”

“Yep!” Applebloom said, nodding emphatically. “This is Rumble,” she said, pointing out a gray colt, “Twist,” a filly with red hair and purple glasses, “and Button Mash,” a brown colt with a spinning propeller hat.

“Well, it’s nice to meet you!” Twilight said, drawing smiles from the assembled children. She was honestly glad to see that at least a few foals took the time to come over and meet Turing Test in person. This might be a good time to start helping her automaton friend integrate. “Everypony, this is my new automaton friend, Turing Test. Or just ‘Turing’ for short. Um, say hello, Turing!”

“Hello,” she replied.

“Its voice is weird,” Scootaloo said, making a face. “I thought it sounded weird when we found it because it got struck by lightning. I guess it always sounds like that.”

“My vocal processor is capable of mimicking speech or various other noises with high accuracy. However, due to numerous limitations, I am unable to do so flawlessly.”

“Can you sound like anypony?” Rumble asked.

“I am capable.”

“Ooh, ooh, could you sing a song?” Sweetie Belle asked excitedly.

“The potential exists. However, hearing the song or scanning the music and lyrics would be required.”

“Hey, aren’t those books and things heavy?” Scootaloo asked, gesturing to the bulging saddlebags.

“I am under no significant hindrance,” Turing Test replied. “Though my upper limits are untested, I estimate from previous data that lifting and carrying in excess of three metric tons would be possible.”

That impressed all of them, Twilight included.

“Dang, even Big Mac would be sweatin’ from that much, I bet!” Applebloom exclaimed, her ears perking up as she stared at Turing.

“You mutht be the thtrongetht pony in Equethtria!” Twist added.

“Unknown, although my lifting and carrying capacity and hull durability far exceed the norms of biological ponies.”

While the other children gabbed excitedly amongst themselves (partly in amazement, partly due to not understanding her wording), Twilight noticed that the brown colt, Button Mash, hadn’t said anything yet, but was staring up at Turing. His eyes were wide and shimmering with awe and his mouth was hanging open.

“Um, little boy?” she asked. The colt didn’t respond. “Hello, um, Button, was it?”

Sweetie Belle poked him with her hoof. “Psst, Button!" she said out of the side of her mouth. "Princess Twilight is talking to you!”

Suddenly Button’s face came to life and he gasped, though not at Twilight. “Aww, cool, it’s a robot!” he shouted, giving a little leap into the air.

Everyone was silent at the word.

“Uh, I don’t know that word,” Twilight said, “but Turing Test is called an ‘automaton.’ Not a... ro-bot.”

“Correct. I am a fully automated mechanical construct which emulates that of biological ponies, therefore classified as an automaton.”

“Nuh uh!” Button shot back, shaking his head. “You’re a robot! I know because you look like the robots in ‘Pronto the Porcupine!’”

“Pronto the… what?” Twilight asked.

“It’s, um… it’s from one of those arcade games,” Sweetie Belle explained, blushing slightly.

“Yeah, exactly! Oh, hold on a second!” He dashed away and returned a few moments later, holding a comic book in his mouth. “Here, look at this!” he said, opening the page. Everyone gathered around to see what he was pointing to.

On the page was a strange-looking mare with orange hair, round spectacles, a red coat with tails, and black pants. She was cackling madly from the top of a building while a cartoonish blue porcupine was glaring up at her. And all around this mad scientist was an army of creatures that looked like ponies, but they were made out of metal. Some even had wind-up keys in their backs and springs for legs, but Twilight and the others had to admit that they somewhat resembled Turing Test.

“This is the official companion comic to the game,” Button was explaining breathlessly, “where the mad scientist Doctor Robotnag creates a bunch of mechanical ponies to do her bidding and take over the world! She decides to name them after herself and calls them ‘robots!’ Pronto’s job is to beat the robots and save everypony with his super speed!”

Twilight picked up the comic and flipped through a few pages. Turing seemed to take an interest in it as well, so Twilight held it up to her.

“Well,” Twilight began, turning her head to the left and right, “I guess these sort of look like Turing Test. A little.”

“That settles it!” Button declared, holding his head up and pointing to Turing Test. “Robot!”

“Yeah, I like ‘robot’ way better than ‘automatron,’” Scootaloo said, struggling on the last word.

“It’s ‘automaton,’ but you’re right,” Sweetie Belle agreed. “‘Robot’ is easier to say.”

The other children all voiced their agreement.

“Now wait a minute! It doesn’t matter if it’s easier to say!” Twilight exclaimed. “The correct term is ‘automaton!’”

“Judging by the semi-independent actions of these machines,” Turing Test said, cutting in after flipping through the entire comic, “I bear greater resemblance to these machines than the automata described in your books, Twilight Sparkle. ‘Robot’ is therefore an acceptable term.”

“Turing, not you too!” Twilight groaned, levitating the comic back to the children. “Listen, just because some comic that you found at… wait, where did you get this?”

“Hey!” yelled the bookseller from before as she galloped toward the group. “You kids didn’t pay for that comic! You owe me three bits!”

The fillies and colts all shared a mutual fearful glance. Clearly, they did not have any money.

“Run for it!” Applebloom yelled and they all scattered in different directions.

“Darn it, Button! Why are you always getting us in trouble?” Sweetie Belle yelled as they ran.

They soon were out of sight, leaving Twilight and Turing Test alone once again.

“Well, that was something, I guess,” Twilight said.

“Correct. It was an interaction followed by a theft.”

Twilight rubbed her forehead. “...Let’s just go home.”

***

Many many miles away, Spitfire and Soarin, leading members of the Wonderbolts, were flying toward a plateau through a mostly cloudless blue sky. The “mostly” was actually what they were called in for. Normally a disturbance involving weather or rainclouds could be handled by a regular weather team, but this was hardly a normal case.

“I think this is it!” Soarin yelled over the roar of wind as they rocketed toward the top of the rock-strewn plateau. They could see that it was actually covered with quite a lot of grass and wildflowers, making it far more lush than the surrounding countryside.

“Nice place, but where are the… ah ha, I see them!” Spitfire called. “Rogue storm clouds at 8 o’clock! And-- wait, are those clouds wearing… tutus?!”

As they got closer, they saw that indeed they were. In fact, the nebulous dark gray clouds, six in all, were in vaguely bipedal shapes and were doing an elaborate series of ballet moves. From nowhere discernible, they could hear the sound of an orchestra playing the theme from “Swan Lake.” And someone singing along with it. Badly.

“Okay, enough of this!” Spitfire shouted. “Who’s responsible for this?! I’m Commander Spitfire of the Wonderbolts and I demand to know who--”

“Oho, a celebrity guest!” a mirthful voice cried. And then there was a flash of light and the responsible party appeared before her.

“Great,” Spitfire groaned. “Discord. I should have known.”

Indeed it was. And the ever-chaotic draconequus either didn’t pick up on her stone-faced glare or just didn’t care. “Listen, this little cloud ballet I’ve got going on has been grand, but we really need someone to play the swan!” he said. He snapped his fingers and Spitfire was suddenly coated with brown feathers on her body, black feathers on her neck and head, white feathers on her cheeks, and her muzzle turned into a long, thin bill. “Ah ha, perfect!" Discord cheered, grinning at her. Then he frowned, his eyes narrowing. "I certainly hope you know how to do a good pas de cheval because I hate to think our performance will be ruined by an amateur.”

Nearby, Soarin was having a hard time keeping himself from laughing out loud.

“First of all, I can pas de cheval with the best of them and I kicked serious flank when I was in the Danse des petits cygnes when I was a filly,” Spitfire said, not missing a beat and staring pointedly at Soarin. “And second of all, this isn’t a swan, it’s a Vanhoover goose you mismatched goon!”

“Sssso, you don’t want the part?” Discord asked, giving her an exaggerated frown.

She only stared back at him, her glare becoming icier.

“Oh very well.” He snapped his fingers and Spitfire returned to her normal shape. “Well, in any case, how can I help such distinguished members of Equestria’s most elite flying team?”

“You can start by telling us what you think you’re doing with those storm clouds!” Spitfire shouted, pointing up at the clouds. “They went missing from a nearby town and the ponies there could use some rain!”

“Oh, that. Well, I was only borrowing them temporarily to put on a little show! I must say they’re doing a pretty good job for a bunch of stratocumuli.” The storm clouds silently seemed to be high-fiving and congratulating each other. “Except for you, number six!" Discord said with a disapproving frown. "I saw that miserable excuse for a pirouette!” The sixth cloud hung its vaguely-shaped head.

“Wait,” Soarin said, jumping into the conversation. “Why? What show?”

“The show I’m putting on for my new mountain pony friends!” Discord replied with a sweeping gesture of his eagle-clawed arm.

They followed his gesture and saw a small family of nomadic mountain ponies sitting by, watching with big smiles on their faces. There was a father with three children.

“You see, they were gathering herbs up here and they just looked so bored that I thought I might brighten up their day with some clouds! A bit ironic when you think about it…”

“That’s kinda cool, I guess,” Soarin said, causing Spitfire’s frown to deepen.

“Now hold on,” Spitfire continued. “Why would you want to entertain a small family?”

“I admit, I’ve got a soft spot for the kids,” Discord said, waving to the foals, who smiled and waved back. “After all, I’m an honorary Cutie Mark Crusader!”

“A what?”

“It’s canon to the comics, don’t worry about it,” Discord said quickly. “Anyway, I do apologize for the inconvenience, but I swear I was going to bring them right back! Don’t you trust me?”

“Heh. Trust you? You don’t remember who I am, do you?” Spitfire asked coldly.

“Uhhhhhh errrrrrrr welllllll--” He stroked his beard, squinting his eyes. "Maaaybe... no, no, that wasn't it..."

“Tirek? A bunch of pegasi trying to stop him? You helping him get strong enough to suck out our ability to fly?”

“Ohhh, right. That.” He looked genuinely embarrassed and actually began to shrink, as if trying to quietly vanish. “Um, would a handwritten apology help?”

“It’d be a start,” Spitfire replied sarcastically, giving a roll of her eyes.

“Oh, good!” Discord exclaimed, snapping his fingers to make a piece of paper appear. “Let’s see… ‘I, Discord, do hereby--’ wait, is that one word or two? Ah, no matter, ‘do hereby apologize to--’”

“Uh, guys?” Soarin said, interrupting the two of them. “There are six clouds, right?”

“Yeah,” Spitfire replied, glancing in his direction. “Why do you… oh come on!”

They looked and saw that there were now five storm clouds instead of six. One of them had wandered off.

“Oops. Well, guess we won’t be doing a second show,” Discord sighed.

“You dope!" Spitfire shouted, throwing her hooves in the air. "Now we’ve got a missing rain cloud!”

“In a tutu,” Soarin added.

“In a tutu!”

Sheepishly, Discord floated over to the remaining clouds and rapidly said “Well so sorry for the trouble hate to rush things but here’s your apology let me take those other clouds back goodbye!” And with that, Discord and the five clouds vanished in a flash of light. Spitfire found a piece of paper stuck to her face with a hastily-written note that said “I.O.U. one apology” on it.

“So, um, should we go find that cloud?” Soarin asked.

Spitfire scanned the horizon and realized she didn’t see it anywhere. “No, I’m not wasting my time tracking one lousy enchanted cloud. Let’s just send out a message telling the regional weather teams to look out for it and that’ll be enough. Come on, let’s go back to Cloudsdale.”

The two of them took off and a few moments later, a sneaky cloud wearing a tutu came out from its hiding place behind a rock and began to fly off, fatefully, to Ponyville.

***

Twilight and Turing Test were nearly to the castle when Spike burst through the front door carrying a letter.

“Twilight, Twilight!” he shouted urgently, waving a piece of paper in his claw. “It’s a letter from Princess Celestia!”

“Oh my gosh, she responded!” Twilight took the letter from Spike, holding it up to read it. “Let’s see… doesn’t say much, just saying she’ll be by to visit in half an hour and to let her know if it’s not okay because she wants to… oh. She wants to ‘talk about the automaton--’”

“Robot,” Turing Test said.

"Huh?" Spike asked, looking to her. "What's a robot?"

"I am a robot."

Twilight interjected herself between the two. “Turing, please be quiet for a moment. Spike, what did you say in response?”

“Nothing! I don’t think I have the authority to tell the Princess ‘no’ in your place. I thought I’d wait for you and Turing to get back.”

“Th-then tell me… Celestia said she would come by in half an hour, right? Now, how long ago did you get this letter?”

“Um,” he gulped, “h-half an hour ago?”

“Warning: unknown aerial object approaching,” Turing Test intoned, ears twitching as she detected the sound.

“Oh no,” Twilight whispered. She and Spike turned their eyes skyward to see what the mechanical mare had spotted. Sure enough, they saw Princess Celestia herself descending in the royal chariot, a cadre of Royal Guard pegasi accompanying her.

Okay, Twilight, stay calm. Stay calm. She took a deep breath, letting it out slowly.

“Don’t worry, Twi--”

“I’m completely calm, Spike!” Twilight shouted.

“R-riiiight,” Spike said.

The two of them watched as Celestia’s chariot touched down. Spike bowed low and Twilight gave a short curtsy, a practiced move she’d learned in her time as a princess.

“Good morning, Twilight Sparkle,” Celestia said warmly, approaching them both. She glanced over at Turing Test and her smile wavered, but then turned back to Twilight. “You seem surprised to see me. Didn’t you get my letter?”

“Uhhh, just a minute ago,” Twilight said. She quickly added “But, of course, you’re always welcome here, Princess Celestia!”

“I’m glad. I was hoping I could have a brief chat with you to discuss the automaton.”

“Correction,” Turing Test said suddenly, startling them. Celestia raised her foreleg, jerking her head back. The nearby Royal Guards stiffened and readied themselves to defend their monarch.

“I have been reclassified as a robot. Please identify yourself, white alicorn.”

“W-what?” Celestia gasped, sucking in a breath at this rough address from this strange mechanical creature.

“Ahahaha, oh, Turing Test, always so curious!” Twilight said, placing herself between Celestia and her new ward. “Um, Turing Test, this is Princess Celestia, my mentor, my friend, and the ruler of Equestria!”

“Please clarify: is she therefore my end user’s end user?”

“That’s not quite right, but for the time being, sure, let’s go with that,” Twilight said, sweat forming on her brow as Celestia stared down at Turing Test. It was rare for her to see Celestia so unnerved by something and she was starting to suspect that Vanderbull hadn’t been exaggerating in the slightest about the Princess’s feelings about technology.

Turing's ears twitched and she bowed her head slightly. “Understood. Greetings, Princess Celestia.”

Celestia just stared back at her.

Turing looked back at Twilight. “Twilight Sparkle, no reply was received. She may have impaired hearing.”

“Turing Test, please just be quiet!” Twilight groaned.

Celestia regained her composure, shaking her head and giving a small cough, and turned back to Twilight, her smile in place once again. “Princess Twilight, could we talk somewhere in private, please?”

“Of course! Spike, would you please go make us some tea? We’ll be on the balcony!”

"Sure thing, Twilight!" Spike replied, rushing ahead of them into the castle.

A Royal Guardspony came near. “Shall we accompany you, Your Highness?”

“No,” Celestia replied. “I’d appreciate it if you would wait for me out here. I won’t be long.”

“Of course, Your Highness.”

The small group entered the castle, Turing Test noisily clicking and whirring all the while, followed by her metallic hooves clanking on the castle floor, which drew an irritated look from Celestia.

Twilight was quick to pick up on Celestia's expression. “Turing, would you please go wait in a room?” she asked.

“Please specify.”

“Any room but my bedroom or the balcony! Just wait there!”

“Understood,” she said, and turned to enter the nearest room, shutting the door behind her.

Celestia said nothing for a moment, but finally let out a long breath, her body losing some of its tension. “It is clearly obedient toward you. That much, I am relieved to see.”

“Y-yeah. She’s a little strange, but she's really not so bad!”

“That… is what I want to talk to you about,” Celestia said slowly.

Uh oh, Twilight thought.

***

The two of them sat on the balcony, a gust of fresh air gently disturbing their manes. Spike had brought them their tea and they sat looking out at Ponyville from their high vantage point.

“It certainly is a wonderful view, Twilight,” Celestia said.

“It is. And this castle really is feeling more and more like my own home every day.” Twilight added a few sugar cubes to her tea, stirring it gently.

“I am very glad to hear that.” Celestia sipped from her cup and gave a satisfied sigh. “Spike has improved his brewing technique. I remember the first time I had tea from him.”

“Oh my gosh, I forgot about that!” Twilight laughed. “He forgot the strainer and it was almost nothing but tea leaves in the cup!”

“It was less a cup of tea and more like a hot salad at that point,” Celestia chuckled.

The two princesses laughed and Twilight momentarily felt silly for having worried about Celestia’s visit. She took a sip of her tea.

“Well, Twilight, as much as I enjoy just spending time with you, I’m afraid we must discuss that machine you’re keeping.”

Twilight tensed up and nearly spilled the tea. “W-what about her?”

Celestia sighed. “I know Vanderbull must have told you of my cautious approach to new technology, Twilight,” she began, looking out at the horizon sadly. “But I want you to know that things are not as simple as Cornelius would have you believe. Let me explain why I have chosen to be this way.

“You see, back when automata were at the height of their popularity, I paid a visit to a farm. While I always found such mechanical things as automata to be novelties and had little interest in them, what I saw that day had a profound effect on me. An inventor had created several mechanical ponies that could plow entire fields on their own. He even gave a demonstration of this, and it was completely perfect and done just as fast as any farmhoof could have done. The inventor claimed the machine could plow ten more fields before the day was through without need for rest or food or even payment.”

“That sounds amazing!” Twilight exclaimed. Then a thought occurred to her and she frowned. “Wait, this was over 100 years ago? Why don’t we have this technology now?”

“Allow me to continue,” Celestia said. “I asked the inventor if his machines had families. He laughed and of course replied that they didn’t. And I then pointed out that the farm workers such a machine would replace, in contrast, did have families. And those families might well go hungry if a machine took their breadwinners’ jobs.”

“Oh,” Twilight said, realizing what her mentor was saying.

“I knew that the day might come when ponies had perfected their craft so well that a mechanical pony might be created that could mimic everything a pony could do. But rather than only taking away one job from ponies, such a machine could replace a pony entirely.” Her expression grew dark. “A whole life reduced to nothing in the face of a machine that can do nearly anything. That is something I could not stand by and watch happen. Thus, I spoke out against and cut funding to such individuals whose automata threatened the livelihood of the average worker. Eventually, the machines went out of style entirely, surviving only as miniature children’s toys.”

Twilight was listening intently. Though she still wanted to speak on Turing Test’s behalf, she was once again struck by how protective and caring Celestia was for her subjects. She wasn’t sure if she agreed or not, but it was good to know that there was some motivation for her mistrust of technology other than a mere resistance to change and progress, as Vanderbull had said.

“I admit that I personally find the sight of that machine you have taken in… disturbing, to say the least,” Celestia continued, “but, at least for the time being, I am more worried about where it came from than what it is. You still don’t know who built it?”

“Unfortunately, no,” Twilight replied, shaking her head. “Although Mr. Vanderbull and his assistant Gadget are researching it and they’ll let me know if they find anything.”

“And yet when it first arrived, it was looking for you specifically, Twilight. This machine sought you out and you have brought it into your home. I fear that it may be a threat to you.”

Twilight bit her lip, but then drew in a breath. “M-maybe she was a threat,” she said, “but her memory from before we found her is gone. Even she doesn’t know why she was sent.”

“Or maybe it just was programmed not to tell you.”

Twilight swallowed. “My friends have also suggested that,” she admitted. “But I don’t think so. Since Turing Test arrived, she’s been totally harmless.”

“That business where it nearly attacked you all was untrue, then?” Celestia asked, raising an eyebrow.

“N-no… That did happen.” She took a deep breath and pressed on. “But that was just her defending herself. And now Turing Test listens to me. I told her to never ever harm anypony and gave her a set of rules to follow.”

“Well, I am glad to hear that. I hope that your trust is not misplaced,” Celestia said, taking another drink from her cup. She swallowed slowly and put the cup down again. She looked down at Twilight. “I have been very worried for you, Twilight. I would be utterly distraught if something were to happen to you, and I shudder to think that someone sent this machine to do you harm. But whether your trust in it is misplaced or not, I will trust your judgment and ask only that you be on your guard and please don’t hesitate to tell me if you suspect the machine of anything.”

Twilight relaxed, glad as always to hear Celestia’s care for her, and especially that she was trusting her. “So,” she said, “you, um… I’m glad you haven’t come to take her away. I was really afraid you would ask me to give her up.”

“I admit the thought crossed my mind, Twilight, but I don’t believe it is my place to interfere in another princess’s duties. I would no more command you to abandon your efforts at making friends than I would make demands on Princess Cadance for the Crystal Empire. However...” and here she took on a pained expression.

“Yes?” Twilight asked, urging her to continue.

“I… I’m afraid I cannot be more supportive of your mission. I have been wrong in the past, just as anypony else is capable of being, and I know that your role in Equestria is of vital importance, but making friends with a machine is not something I believe to be possible. It may be intelligent, in its own way, but when I see that machine..." she paused, closing her eyes, "...I cannot believe that it has anything resembling a heart. It is not truly even alive; it is only an illusion that it appears to be so. To tell the truth, I think it should be shut down and permanently dismantled."

Twilight gasped, bringing herself up to speak.

"But I can tell that you would never allow it, Princess Twilight, and I am not going to force you. Instead, I would ask that you not let your curiosity and your kind heart deceive you; if that machine is not capable of friendship or if it becomes dangerous, then I’d like you to inform me. Then we can decide what to do with it.”

You’re wrong, Princess, Twilight thought, choosing not to say it aloud. Yesterday… it was only for a moment or two, but I know that Turing Test changed somehow. Even she isn’t completely sure about it, but I have to believe that an intelligent being like her really can have emotions!

Outwardly, she only said, “I understand, Princess Celestia. I guess we’ll find out together!” She offered her a smile, which Celestia returned.

“I suppose we will,” Celestia replied, and drank the last of her tea.

To be continued...

Electric Ladyland, Part 2

View Online

Twilight and Spike went back inside after bidding Princess Celestia farewell. She heaved a sigh of relief and actually sat down, slumping against the front door, and Spike nearly joined her.

“That could have gone better,” Twilight said, letting out a long sigh. Then she raised her head, brightening. “But it also could have gone much worse! It looks like Princess Celestia will let me handle this!” Then, raising her voice, she called out: “Turing Test? Turing, are you around?”

“I am here, Twilight Sparkle,” she responded, her voice coming from the room she’d entered earlier. “I require your input.”

“Input?” Twilight asked, walking to the room. She opened the door and found her robot friend sitting in front of a tall mirror. “Turing? What are you doing?”

“I am cataloging and comparing known physical differences between myself and the general norms of biological ponies. This present situation is the first time I have viewed my own image in its entirety.”

“Oh. I guess that’s right, I hadn't really put you in front of a mirror before. Um… thoughts?”

“Unable to complete task. My shape is that of a biological pony and I have many of the same features. However, in our recent outing, my auditory sensors picked up several onlookers commenting on my physical appearance.”

To Twilight’s surprise, Turing then imitated several ponies' voices, mimicking their inflection and pronunciation perfectly: “‘What is that thing? It didn’t look like that in the newspaper!’ ‘Wow, that ugly thing is a mechanical pony? Weird.’ ‘Hey, get a load of that machine with Princess Twilight! Doesn’t she get freaked out being followed by a talking hunk of metal?’ ‘Mommy, I’m scared!’ ‘Oh, jeez, I think it looked at me! Do you think it eats? What in the world is the princess doing with that monstrosity?!’”

“Turing, enough!” Twilight cried.

“Apologies, Twilight Sparkle. I only wished to convey several comments. Is it correct to state that the majority of ponies are disturbed or disgusted by my appearance?”

Twilight hesitated and looked at Turing carefully. Without the ability to change her facial expression, it was impossible to tell just by looking at her if she had any emotional response. With a normal pony, Twilight would have likely assured her that such an awful thing was not the case. But with Turing…

She leaned closer to the robot. “Turing Test, do you… I mean, does it bother you?”

“I am attempting to discern how I am perceived by others.”

Twilight swallowed. “Then… yes, I think that it is true. Not everypony, but yes. Most ponies are not used to seeing an automaton in their midst.”

“Robot.”

“Okay, fine, ‘robot!’” Twilight exclaimed, throwing her hooves in the air as she gave up. “But listen: just because some ponies are scared of how you look, that doesn’t mean anything.”

“That contradicts the data obtained in your books, Twilight Sparkle,” Turing replied. “It is clear that ponies form bonds based on a number of factors. Physically acceptable or pleasing appearance is one of the most common of those factors, especially in the case of romantic relationships. I have seen this in 100% of stories documenting pony courtship found in your library, including an unfinished quill-written manuscript describing the relationship between one 'Flashlight Twinkle' and one 'Dash Gentry.'”

Twilight’s eyes bulged and her cheeks went red. She knows!

“The reactions of the citizens of Ponyville, Twilight Sparkle’s friends, and Princess Celestia all indicate that my physical appearance is unacceptable.” She turned back to the mirror. “This is an impediment to my directive of making friends. A solution must be found.”

“Wellll, there’s more to making friends than physical appearance, but I don’t see any harm in helping you look your best,” Twilight said, starting to think out loud. “Unfortunately, that’s not something I’m an expert in. The only pony I know who is an expert is… of course!” Her face lit up. “Rarity! She’s the perfect pony to help you! Oh, and this is a great opportunity for you to bond over something! Come on, Turing, we’re going to the Carousel Boutique!”

“Um, Twilight,” Spike said, his voice coming from the main hall, “I think you might want to look at this before you go.”

Twilight and Turing exited the room and Twilight saw a veritable mountain of envelopes stacked at the door. “What in Equestria is that?!”

“The telegraph office sent over a bunch of these telegrams and the post office delivered a bunch of mail too. They say there’s still more coming, too!”

“What? What are they writing about?”

Spike rolled his eyes. “Take a wild guess.” He jerked his head toward Turing Test.

“Oh. Right. Wellll, I better answer them… but I was going to take Turing to see Rarity…” She paused to consider it, tapping her chin with her hoof. “Okay, I know what to do. Spike, I’m going to write a note to Rarity explaining the situation. I want you to take Turing over to the Boutique. I’ll look through this mail.”

“To see Rarity?” Spike's eyes lit up and he clasped his claws together eagerly. Then he paused and asked, “Are you sure you don’t want help with these letters?”

“No, I want to look at these in private anyway,” she replied, levitating one of the letters up to her face. “But do me a favor and let me know when you’re back so I can see Turing’s new look, okay?” She smiled and winked at Turing. “Give my regards to Rarity, you two!”

***

Rarity was adjusting a dress on display in the window of the Carousel Boutique when the bell over the door rang. A customer! She turned, putting on her best smile.

“Hello! My name is Rarity, and welcome to the Carousel Bout-eek!”

“Hi, Rarity!” Spike said, waving to her.

Her attention wasn’t on the little purple dragon, of course, but on the mechanical pony right behind him.

“S-Spike? What is this, why is the… oh, what was Sweetie calling it this morning?… Oh, yes, ‘robot!’” She smiled, apparently pleased to remember the term. “Yes, robot, that really is a much better word than that mouthful of a word ‘automaton,’ that Twilight keeps saying.”

“Yeah, Turing Test here seems to prefer it too,” Spike said.

“That is correct,” Turing agreed. “‘Robot’ is favored by juveniles. It is the choice of a new generation.”

“Well, now that we’ve got that settled… what is that robot doing here?!”

“Twilight Sparkle has directed me to seek your assistance in attaining positive aesthetic modification.”

“Er, come again?”

“She wants to be pretty,” Spike said, rolling his eyes. “Seriously, Turing can’t you just talk normally, like me?”

“Affirmative. Extrapolating data,” Turing said, and then, perfectly matching Spike’s voice, said “Hello! I am Spike the Dragon! I enjoy naps and graphic-intensive manuscripts! Let us all breathe fire and consume gemstones!”

“Cut that out!” Spike yelled, stomping his foot and glaring at her. “I don’t sound like that!” Then he caught sight of Rarity stifling a laugh and his expression fell. “Aww, Rarity, don’t laugh!”

Rarity covered her mouth, looking away as she tried to stop laughing. “Oh, yes, um, sorry about that, Spikey-wikey.” She regained her composure and continued, glancing over at Turing. “So, what do you mean it wants to be pretty?”

Spike offered her the note Twilight had written. Rarity read it over, scrunching her face up as she did so. “My my, that is quite a request. But… it says here to help her ‘friend.’ Does that mean--”

“Yeah, Turing’s actually really nice! Maybe a little different, but you should give her a chance!”

“Affirmative. Twilight Sparkle and Spike the Dragon have both identified me as a ‘friend.’”

“Hmm,” Rarity said, wrinkling her nose. “Well… Applejack did say she’d be willing to give things a try if Twilight could become friends with this mach-- er, with Turing. I suppose…”

“Please, Rarity?” Spike asked, giving her the best puppy dog eyes a dragon could muster.

“Oh, what the hay! I am a professional, darling, and I never back down from a challenge!” She pointed a hoof at Turing Test. “Ready your chassis, Miss Test! I am going to give your look the greatest upgrade it has ever had!”

***

“Let’s see, ‘To Her Royal Highness Princess Twilight Sparkle’ yadda yadda ‘automaton sounds fascinating’ yadda yadda ‘would love to have it join our traveling’ whatever. Ugh!”

Twilight occasionally got fan letters or questions from citizens of Equestria, usually children, and those were ones she did her best to answer. But most of the telegrams and letters this time were, of course, about Turing Test, just as Spike had suggested. She tossed the latest letter aside and read another message and then another and another and so on.

A few of them are genuinely curious about studying her or learning more about what results I’m getting. Then there are the ones asking if Turing could be part of a circus or magic show or some other crazy sideshow attraction! What is wrong with these ponies asking things like that?! She opened a few more letters, reading them quickly and then throwing them out once she got the gist of whatever they wanted.

But the sideshow letters aren’t the worst. Not even the ones calling this a hoax are the worst. No, the worst ones are… She picked up a letter and read it. This kind.

She saw the familiar words: ‘very interested,’ ‘acquire your unique machine,’ and ‘greatly compensated for the device.’

Twilight grimaced as she crumpled the letter. They want me to sell her.

***

“Is this satisfactory?” Turing Test asked, exiting the dressing room wearing another of Rarity’s selections.

“Oh, no, no, no, that isn’t right either!” Rarity moaned, throwing her foreleg across her forehead dramatically.

They’d been trying on several different dresses, ranging from a flowing gown to a simple frock to a business suit and even a wool sweater. And yet somehow nothing looked right on the mechanical mare.

“I’m no expert, Rarity,” Spike said, narrowing his eyes, “but… yeah, for some reason none of your dresses look good.” He paused and quickly added “I mean on her! Of course they’re all great, they just--”

“No, Spike, no offense taken; you’re absolutely correct." She frowned, going over to Turing. "These dresses would look good on any number of ponies, but for some reason they just look out of place on Turing. It’s hard to say why.”

“Perhaps it is the hue or texture?” Turing suggested.

“No, that’s not it,” Rarity said, inspecting the dress more closely, lifting up the hem of the skirt.

“Some mares in Twilight Sparkle’s books complain of dresses causing their posteriors to appear abnormally large.”

“Your robodonkadonk looks fine, darling,” Rarity assured her with a smile.

Turing tilted her head to the side. “Idiom not found.”

“Never mind that.” Rarity walked all around her, fussing with the sleeves, the hemline, and everything she could before stepping back and shaking her head.

“Any ideas, Rarity?” Spike asked.

“Not really. Oh! Unless we could do something about your mane or tail, Miss Turing?” Rarity lifted one of the grayish-white locks of Turing's mane, but Turing took a step back.

“Inadvisable. My mane and tail are composed of conical filaments that draw heat from my inner machinery. Modifying them could jeopardize my functionality.”

She tossed her head back, letting a groan escape her. “Well, I guess that’s a no on the perm. Too bad! It’s hard to find something to complement all those curls.” She sat down to catch her breath and looked down at Spike. “It’s no good, Spikey-wikey. No matter what she tries on she just looks like… like…”

“Like a robot in a dress.”

“Exactly!” she cried, tossing her hooves in the air. “Oh what to do, what to do, I can’t believe my fashion expertise has failed me!”

“Um…” Spike began, scratching his head while trying to think of suggestion, “maybe… uhh… makeup?”

“Don’t be silly, Spike.” She rolled her eyes at the very suggestion. “She doesn’t have eyelids or eyelashes, so that rules out eyeshadow or mascara. For pony’s sake, she doesn’t have lips, so we can’t even apply lipstick! And even if we could, it would take more to help her fit in than just painting her face!”

Spike looked down, but then he saw Rarity’s eyes light up.

“Oh wait wait wait… 'Paint her face.' Yes! Ah ha, idee~aa! Spike, you might be right after all!”

She walked over to Turing Test and gave her a confident smile. “I know just how to help you, Miss Turing! Let’s get that dress back on the rack and then we’re going out to find a true artiste!”

***

Rainbow Dash reclined lazily on a cloud just outside Ponyville when another pegasus flew over carrying a note.

“You Rainbow Dash?” he asked.

“The one and only!” she replied haughtily, standing up and placing a hoof on her chest.

The messenger rolled his eyes and passed the note to her. “Message from Cloudsdale. The Wonderbolts reported a strange rogue cloud. Details are in the letter.”

“Rogue cloud?” She took the envelope, raising an eyebrow as she looked at it.

“Apparently. Good luck if you see it!” he then flew off, leaving Rainbow Dash to open the letter.

She opened it and read it carefully. Then she looked up, nose crinkled and eyebrow raised. “...In a tutu? Is this some kind of joke?!” She laid back down on her cloud, tossing the letter over the side. Forget it. This sounds like some kind of prank from those hot-shots in Cloudsdale and I’m not going to fall for it and waste the other weatherponies’ time looking for some imaginary cloud!

She closed her eyes and began to doze, snoring loudly. She slept so soundly that she didn’t even wake up at the sound of “Swan Lake” wafting through the air…

***

Palette Swap, the local paint and art supplies vendor of Ponyville, was drawing a simple sketch alone in his shop. He sold paint, brushes, easels, canvas, that sort of thing, but it was a fairly slow day for art supplies, so he thought he would plan his next watercolor painting. Then he raised his head as he heard a knock at the door.

“Oui?” he called. The door opened and he smiled, putting his signature red beret on over his blue mane. “Welcome to my shop! How may I help-- sacrebleu!”

It wasn’t the reaction Rarity had been hoping for, not that she had done much better when Turing Test had come into her shop. Still, she decided to downplay it and led Spike and Turing Test up to the counter.

“Palette, I apologize for the suddenness of this request, but I am in dire need of your assistance and expertise!”

“Moi?” he asked, glancing between Rarity and her companions uncertainly.

“Yes!” Rarity exclaimed. “As you may know, my dear friend Twilight Sparkle has taken it upon herself to teach this robot the finer points of friendship. Alas, her appearance, as you so perfectly demonstrated, is prone to making ponies jump right out of their skin with fright! Despite my best efforts, it seems even the magic I work with dresses isn’t enough to help her. But then I realized that there may still be a ray of hope!”

Palette Swap blinked. “I… don’t quite understand, but please go on.”

“My point is, mon ami, that I want to enhance her appearance not with clothing, but with paint! And that is where you come in, for I can think of nopony better qualified to give Miss Turing Test here the perfect artistic flare she desires!” She stood on her hind legs, spinning around, gesturing to the huge assortment of paint in all colors surrounding the little shop.

“Oh, Mademoiselle Rarity, you do flatter me, but this pony,” he looked to Turing Test, pausing for a moment, “she is, how do you say, not really my ‘schtick.’ I work with canvas, wood, and paper, but this metal and machinery is--”

“I require your assistance,” Turing Test said, startling the art vendor once again. She took a step closer to him, looking up at him with her violet eyes. “It is my directive to make friends. If I am to form bonds with ponies, it may be necessary to update my appearance. Your assistance could enhance my aesthetic value.”

He blinked, then tilted his head as he looked down at her. “You want me to make you... beautiful?”

“Correct. Ponies on the street find my appearance unacceptable. Such terms I have heard in the last 24 hours include the terms ‘ugly thing,’ ‘freakish contraption,’ and ‘monstrosity.’”

The rest of them were silent at this. Palette and Spike looked away. Rarity put a hoof over her mouth, but then found her words. “Oh. Oh, darling, that really is awful.” She looked away, feeling a bit guilty for her own previous judgments about this strange robot.

“Are you able to assist me, Palette Swap?” Turing asked. Then, considering that the phrase had such a strong effect on Twilight Sparkle, she added, “Please?”

He smiled. “How could I say no to Miss Rarity and such a polite poney mécanique? Very well, I shall lend a hoof to your cause!”

“Thank you, Palette,” Rarity said with a smile. “Now, I have some design ideas, but I’ll need your help choosing the right colors and accents!”

“Very well, but the first thing is first: we must apply a coat of primer to her! If you will both assist me, I will take her to my back room and get you both a pair of paint shirts and berets!”

Spike raised a claw tentatively. “Uh, why berets?”

“Pfft, such a ridiculous question!” Palette laughed, walking to the back room.

Spike waited and waited, but when he never got an answer, he shrugged his shoulders and walked to the back room.

***

A few hours later, a small crowd had gathered outside Palette Swap’s shop. The news of what was happening traveled fast and even Ponyville’s citizenry was not above gossip and a free show. Spike had run out to get lunch and blabbed about what he was working on with Rarity and Palette at the Hay Burger and soon the word spread to half a dozen others who told friend after friend and finally a crowd of over fifty ponies was milling around in the road outside the paint shop.

“I am telling you, Miss Rarity,” Palette said, peeking through the windows, “we should wait until tonight! The paint, she is not dry!”

“Oh, a simple walk to the castle won’t do it any harm!” Rarity laughed, dismissing the idea. “Besides, the whole point was to make Turing Test look more pleasing to the eye. Now we have a chance to show dozens and dozens of ponies what we’ve done! We can’t miss this opportunity!”

“Well, perhaps, but--”

“And it is sure to drive up business for the shop!” Rarity added, giving him a sly wink.

His worried look melted away. “Ah. When you put it that way, I suppose you have a point!” He chuckled and looked to Spike and Turing Test. “You are ready, Monsieur Spike, Mademoiselle Turing?”

“Ready!” Spike said.

“If Rarity and Spike the Dragon and Palette Swap are confident that this will gain everypony’s approval, then I am prepared.”

“Let me go out first and give it some dramatic flair,” Rarity said, looking back at them as she made for the door. “This will be the talk of the town!”

She went outside, blinking in the bright sun of the afternoon. All the ponies in the crowd had been chatting excitedly, some sneering and ready to get a good laugh at the mechanical freak show. Rarity intended to show the naysayers a thing or two.

“Ladies and gentlecolts!” Rarity shouted, and the crowd all snapped to attention. “I know many of you came to see what we have wrought! Science from parts unknown in Equestria built the strange robot known as Turing Test!” A murmur went through the crowd at the word ‘robot.’ Everypony gathered seemed to take an immediate liking to the term. Rarity went on. “As I have said, science may have built her, but in teaching her friendship, Princess Twilight Sparkle will give her a heart! Nay, a soul! And to celebrate this, Palette Swap and I have fused art and fashion to give her a new look that is sure to leave you dazzled! So, without further ado, I present to you all… Miss Turing Test!”

Turing emerged at the mention of her name. As she stepped into the light, a collective sound of awe swelled up from the crowd.

Rarity had originally wanted cooler colors, but in the end they had decided on a theme of red, white, and blue. The bottom parts of her forelegs had been painted blue with white stars on each leg, and her head and body had an asymmetrical, almost checkerboard-like red and white alternation. Her flank was blue and her back legs red, again with the white star motif on them. Though they couldn’t modify her mane, they did toss in a little glitter to give it some extra sparkle. Rarity had been afraid that the colors would clash, but somehow, with Palette Swap’s help, they managed to pull it off. And now Turing Test stood shining brightly, her new coat of paint standing in sharp contrast to her drab metallic hull from before.

“Greetings, citizens of Ponyville,” Turing Test said. “My goal is to integrate and become friends with normal ponies. Hopefully my appearance is more acceptable to you now.”

The crowd began to chatter excitedly, impressed and their initial fears about this strange mechanical pony began to dissipate. Somepony began stomping their hooves and others joined while still others began to applaud directly.

“Rarity, you did it!” Spike whispered, coming up alongside her.

“I’d say we did it, Spikey-wikey,” she replied, giving him a wink. His heart melted and did his best to hide his blush from her.

“Good luck, my friends,” Palette said, waving goodbye as they left. “Madamoiselles, Monsieur, it has been my pleasure!”

As the crowd parted, Rarity led Turing Test and Spike down the road. All along the way, more and more ponies stopped what they were doing and gasped, smiling with glee at the colorful sight before them. Some of the same ponies from that morning were still out and about and now looked on Turing not with apprehension, but amazement.

Processing. Turing Test began to assess the situation. Aesthetic appearance has been improved successfully. Responses to this unit show a significant rise in positivity. This unit is... She paused, her functions momentarily seizing up. I am no longer unpleasant to look at. I am no longer ‘ugly.’

“Darling, try not to lag behind,” Rarity exclaimed with a laugh. “Besides, with your new look, this is no time to simply walk. This is the time to strut!”

Rarity broke into a trot, holding her head high and proud. Turing Test fell in line behind her, mimicking the action. This seemed to get an even more positive response from the onlookers. They smiled and turned their heads, cheered, laughed, and some even ran alongside the little parade.

"Strutting is successful," she said, which got a laugh from Rarity. If I am no longer ugly and if other ponies find my appearance pleasing, then I will be able to make friends more easily. This action will please Twilight Sparkle. Other ponies will reciprocate positively in the same manner as Rarity and Palette Swap. I will be accepted.

It was an intriguing thought. Perhaps everything would become simpler. Perhaps many more ponies would want to be her friend.

Eventually the crowd of onlookers and followers thinned out as they got closer to the castle. About fifty meters from it, Rarity stopped, causing Spike and Turing Test to do the same.

Rarity tapped her chin, then raised her head with a smile. “Spike, come with me, please! Turing, please stay out here for a moment. I've just had an idea! I’d like Twilight to come out here and get a look at you in the sunlight! It will be such a surprise! Ooh, she is going to just love this!”

“Understood,” Turing Test said.

Rarity looked her over once more and her smile grew. “Oh, darling, I just can’t get over how fabulous you look!” she cooed. And with that, Rarity and Spike rushed inside to get Twilight.

Turing Test stood there. She didn’t know why, but this new appearance, for whatever reason, had a profound effect on ponies. She hoped Twilight would like it. If so, then Twilight Sparkle would be pleased with her efforts and like her more. And so would others. She was "stylish." She was "fabulous." She was...

"I am beautiful." That word lingered in her mind. Beautiful. I am beautiful.

Then she heard a strange sound. Ears twitching on their hinges, she glanced skyward and caught a strange sight.

“Unidentified aerial object located,” she said aloud. “Auditory input from unknown source. Magical readings cannot be analyzed.”

Something was coming toward her in the sky. It was a cloud wearing a tutu and dancing to ‘Swan Lake.’ It was doing dance movements in the sky, spinning and turning and leaping. Turing Test knew what a cloud was, and anypony would normally have been able to see from its dark gray color that it was, in fact, a raincloud.

But Turing also knew that clouds did not wear tutus; therefore, with that narrow definition, she didn’t recognize the thing before her as a raincloud. Instead, she only regarded it as thing to be analyzed as the music wound to a close and the cloud finished with a grand gesture directly overhead.

And as Discord’s magic finally ran out, Twilight Sparkle, Rarity, and Spike all walked out the front door of the castle. They arrived too late to see the tutu disappear, but just soon enough to catch a glimpse of Turing’s new look.

Twilight's eyes went wide and they lit up as she saw Turing in her dazzling array of bright colors. For one brief, glorious moment, she saw Turing shining in the sun.

The robot began to take a step. "Twilight Sparkle, I--"

And then the rain cloud, no longer enchanted, bloated and heavy with precipitation, emptied its entire contents of water onto Turing.

“Noooo!” Rarity shrieked, seeing the day’s work ruined in an instant.

The downpour was short-lived, but powerful. The cloud shrank down and dissipated into nothingness. When it cleared, Turing was dripping wet, steam rising from her warm mane and sun-heated hull. The paint, so painstakingly applied, was now almost completely washed away. The red, white, and blue paint mixed into the mud to create a murky shade of pink. Wet clumps of glitter slowly fell from her mane. Only a few blotches of the paint and the remnants of one of the stars on her legs were left.

Turing looked back at herself, and then down at her hoof, seeing the bare, unpainted metal. “Outer coloring removed,” she intoned. “Aesthetic enhancement lost.” She looked over to where Rarity, Twilight, and Spike were all gawking at her, too stunned to react further. She sat down in the mud with a wet squelch. Her ears slowly lowered and she looked down at the paint that had formerly adorned her body, now useless and ruined.

“Turing Test!” Twilight exclaimed, running over to her. She slowed, seeing the way Turing's head was lowered. “Turing, are you… are you okay?”

“Physical condition is undamaged,” she replied. “My hull is resistant to rust unless exposed to water for prolonged periods of time.”

Twilight gave her a weak smile. “That’s… well, I’m glad for that, at least.”

But then Turing Test spoke again: “Twilight Sparkle. I… I am…”

They all looked to each other. They’d never heard Turing Test hesitate or fumble with words before.

“Cognitive functions have entered into a continuous loop. This experience is deemed significant. However, unlike the previously identified ‘gratification,’ I do not wish to experience it further. I am unable to fully process the data.”

“What did she say, Twilight?” Rarity asked, leaning over to her.

Twilight furrowed her brow. “I’m… I’m not really sure.” She cleared her throat. "Turing, could you please explain?"

“Clarifying: it seems probable that I am again experiencing an emotion. Analyzing...” She raised her head slightly, though her ears were still lowered. “Miss Rarity and Spike the Dragon and Palette Swap devoted effort toward my physical improvement. Such effort has now been negated. Twilight Sparkle wished to assist me in this goal. Now you will be unsatisfied in this regard. I am again unpleasant to look at. Ponies will not wish to become friends with me. I am… sad.”

“Oh, you poor thing!” Rarity cried, bursting into tears. She threw her hooves around Turing’s neck. “I’m so so sorry, darling!" She took a deep breath, sniffling. "But don’t you worry! We can take you back tomorrow and get that coat reapplied! And we’ll let it dry this time!”

“Um, Rarity, Turing,” Twilight said, and took a deep breath, closing her eyes. “I… I’m sorry, but Turing is made of an alloy that won’t hold paint very well. I know this because it came up when I suggested painting her to Mr. Vanderbull and Gadget a few days ago. It would crack and peel from the continuous heat she gives off. We’d need to get a special kind of industrial paint and they only sell it in bulk. And it’s very expensive.”

“Well, how expensive?” Rarity asked, drawing herself up. "Surely it can't be--"

“Over a thousand bits per barrel."

Rarity's voice caught in her throat.

"That’s 75 liters of paint, by the way," Twilight continued. "And you had three colors, so of course we’d need three barrels.”

“Oh.”

“And we’d need to reapply it to her once a month since she moves around so much that it would probably get scratched and start to flake off. We’d have to keep buying it.”

Rarity made a face. That was far more than any of them could reasonably afford, even if she and her other five friends chipped in. And she suspected that not all of them would be willing to do so.

“I... I see,” Rarity said quietly. She turned back to Turing, heaving a long sigh. “I’m sorry, sweetie, but I don’t think we can do this again after all.”

Turing Test said nothing. She only looked back down, poking at the mud with her hoof, noticing the way the paint mixed with it. After another moment, she looked back up and said, “Understood.”

Spike tapped Twilight on the shoulder. “What now, Twilight?”

“Let’s go inside and get Turing cleaned up, Spike. We’ll talk about what to do after that.”

***

Rarity and Twilight finished toweling off Turing Test after getting rid of the excess paint. She was now back to her original look.

“Oh, I just feel awful about this whole mess,” Rarity said, fussing and pacing back in the spacious bathroom where they’d washed off the remaining paint.

“You shouldn’t, Rarity,” Twilight said gently, as she wadded up a towel and tossed it into the hamper. “Your heart really was in the right place. Thank you very much for trying to help Turing Test.”

“Twilight Sparkle is correct,” Turing added. “My current state of ‘sadness’ is only due to the impermanence of your contribution. The act of applying paint itself was helpful.”

“Well, on the bright side,” Rarity said, smiling as she raised her head slightly, “at least a lot of ponies got to see that paint before it was washed away. You still might have made an impact on how this town sees you, Turing.”

“Analyzing… that is possible.”

“There, you see!” Twilight exclaimed. “It wasn’t a total loss, although I wish I'd had a chance to see your paint job for myself for more than a second.”

They walked back out of the bathroom and walked down the hall, intending to see Rarity out. They passed Twilight’s study along the way, which was where she had been reading and answering letters all day. Spike was carrying the envelopes of those few she had chosen to respond to when he encountered them.

“Aw, going home so soon, Rarity?” Spike asked, frowning and kicking at the ground.

“I’m afraid so, Precious Scales." She put a hoof over her mouth as she yawned. "I’m actually a bit exhausted after all that happened today.”

“I could walk you home!” he offered, perking up. “I need to stop by the post office to drop off these letters Twilight is sending, s-so, heh heh, you know, it’s on the way.”

“If you take the long way,” Rarity pointed out.

“It's not long! It, uh, it’s the scenic route!” Spike exclaimed.

Rarity smiled, but then, looking through the door into Twilight's study, she noticed the huge pile of mostly crumpled letters in the waste basket in the study. “Hm? What in Equestria are all those letters and telegrams about, Twilight?”

“Oh, just ponies mailing me about Turing,” Twilight said quickly, moving to close the door.

“Scanning letters,” Turing Test said, peering at the letters, reading the text of those she could see clearly through the door.

“Turing, no!”

“Aborting. Scan incomplete. However, it appears that many letters have made a financial offer to Twilight Sparkle for the acquisition of this unit.” Turing Test cocked her head and turned to Twilight, who had already placed her hoof on her forehead. “The offers appear to be substantial.”

“Wait just one minute,” Rarity said, her eyes going wide. “There are ponies that tried to buy Turing Test?!”

“Oh my gosh! You’re not going to sell her, are you, Twilight?!” Spike cried, latching onto Twilight as he looked up at her entreatingly.

“No, of course not!” Twilight groaned. “I threw those letters out for a reason.”

“Illogical,” Turing said, catching their attention. “Previously, Twilight Sparkle and Rarity indicated that they lacked the finances to purchase items in excess of 3000 bits total. However, the top offer made for me was 11 million bits.”

“ELEVEN MILLION?!” Rarity and Spike shouted.

“I don’t care how much it is,” Twilight groaned, rolling her eyes.

“Well, neither do we!” Spike said defensively, Rarity nodding alongside him. “But seriously, that’s a pretty surprising amount of money! That’s… I mean, that’s unbelievable!”

“Twilight Sparkle, you could use that money for your own comfort. Or, should you wish to use it for the sake of others, you could use it for the nourishment of orphaned foals, the improvement of Ponyville’s infrastructure, or any number of altruistic goals.

“By contrast, this unit is of less value to you. I have proven slow to learn magic. I have frustrated you and cost you and Miss Rarity money. I have frightened others and made you an object of ridicule. I have had only limited success making friends. My appearance is unappealing. I am a faulty companion and unworthy as an assistant. Why do you not sell me?”

“Because you’re my friend, Turing!” Twilight shouted, stomping her hoof. “Many of those things you said might be true, but none of that matters! I don’t think I have the right to sell you, even if I actually wanted to! You’re not just some machine to me, and I don’t care what Celestia, the villagers, or anypony else says! You aren’t a burden; in spite of some minor troubles I like having you around, Turing Test! You’re a friend of mine and I would never ever sell you!”

They were all silent at that.

Rarity finally broke the silence, her eyes again watering. “Oh, Twilight… you really do care for her!” She turned to Turing, who was still totally motionless, though her ears had shot straight up. Rarity smiled and went over to the robot pony and hugged her again. “You know what, Turing? You can take comfort in knowing you’ve added one more friend to your list of successes, so don’t be so hard on yourself.”

Twilight and Spike shared a look and also came over, embracing Turing Test in what had become a group hug.

“Strange,” Turing said quietly. “The cognitive loop previously identified as ‘sadness’ has terminated. No explanation is available.”

Twilight laughed. “I guess that means you feel better.”

“Feel.” Turing said, as if trying out the word. Her ears twitched. “Checking status: feeling better… the possibility exists. Thank you, Twilight Sparkle and Rarity and Spike the Dragon.”

“You’re welcome, darling,” Rarity said, letting her new friend go. “Now, come along, Spike! I need to get home and you need to drop off those letters! I think the post office should still be open if we hurry!”

Twilight and Turing watched them go. “Oh, by the way, Turing,” Twilight said, “one of the letters was from Gadget. She’s asking me to test out your capabilities. Up for some exercise tomorrow?”

“I do not require exercise, but I will comply with physical diagnostics.”

“Great! In fact, I bet I know another pony who might be interested,” she said, a sly grin on her face. She turned to go back into her study.

Turing Test, however, made her way down the hallway back to the room with the mirror. She looked at herself in it just as before.

“Running query: Is Turing Test a pony or merely a construction resembling one?” She let her processor check the data against biological definitions, scientific ones, the philosophy texts she’d read, and what she’d heard other ponies say, including Twilight. “Results inconclusive. Query will require more data.”

She stared a moment longer at the mirror as she stood alone in the room. The image only told her so much. She would learn more about herself tomorrow. In the meantime, she could only stare at the strange creature in the looking glass and ask of it one question: “What am I?”

To be continued...

Harder Better Faster Stronger

View Online

In the green, open plain just outside Ponyville, a pair of ponies came up over a hill, their hooves rustling the lush grass as they walked. The sun warmed the land and a light breeze rustled the leaves on the trees scattered here and there over the area. Wildflowers of purple, orange, and yellow dotted the land and the wind carried their scent over to the pair.

“What a gorgeous day!” Twilight Sparkle exclaimed. She inhaled through her nose and sighed happily. “Oh, those flowers… just wonderful. We could not have picked a nicer day to do this!”

“Commencing intake of air,” Turing Test said, and a slight humming sound was heard as she drew air in through her own nostrils. “No toxins detected. Spectrographic analysis reveals several elements. Flower pollen is one of the many substances. Sodium laureth sulfate is also present.”

“What the heck is that last one?”

“A key ingredient in your shampoo, Twilight Sparkle.”

Twilight rolled her eyes. “Come on, Turing, don't these sights or maybe the smells make you feel something? Maybe another emotion?” She leaned toward her robotic companion with a hopeful grin.

“Processing visual input… negative. Processing olfactory input… negative. No emotions detected.”

“Darn,” Twilight said, heaving a sigh. “I really thought at least that sweet smell would do something.”

“While I am able to receive input through what could be considered my ‘nose,’ I am only able to detect and analyze the different components of the air. While my ability to do so outperforms that of biological ponies, I lack the ability to make judgments about odors in any sense of preference.”

“So… you can’t really smell anything?” Twilight asked. “Like, if I put a flower or a pile of garbage in front of you, you would have no idea which one would smell good?”

“Clarifying: I would know from experience that certain smells would be undesirable to others, but as I lack olfactory neurons, I do not truly experience such a sensation as ‘smelling’ it. Therefore, I would be able to make no judgment of preference for myself. For example, you could express enjoyment of two varieties of flowers and still state preference of one over another. In contrast, I am incapable of making such a distinction. Without reference to others, such distinctions are impossible.”

“Oh.” Twilight frowned. She felt a little sorry for Turing, but supposed that at least she was learning more about her robotic companion. “Uh, well, what about sights? Could you, say, tell me if something was beautiful or not?”

“Again, only through prior experience. Extrapolating such data is exceedingly complex and seems to vary from individual to individual. I was able to determine that my appearance was unacceptable to many ponies yesterday, but I required Rarity’s assistance to inform me of such things as what clothing went with my eyes, that my mane was difficult to match to many clothing styles, and that my ‘robodonkadonk’ was of sufficient dimensions and mass.”

Twilight nearly choked. “Your w-what?”

“Clarifying: my posterior.”

Twilight got her giggling under control. “Well, anyway, at least we know more about what you can and can’t do. And that’s what we’re here for today! Just as soon as…”

“Twilight! Turing!" came a familiar voice. "I’m here, I’m here!”

They both turned to see Spike running up to them. He held a long scroll that was currently rolled up in one claw, and a quill in the other. He also carried a bottle of ink under one arm and set them all down. Additionally, he carried a backpack that clattered as he walked. He set that down as well. “Sorry I was late, Twilight. I got that extra ink and the supplies you wanted.”

“No problem, Spike, we weren’t waiting long. Thanks for getting those!” She smiled and turned to Turing Test. “Okay, Turing. Spike and I are going to check your physical abilities. Are you ready?”

Turing stood up straight like a soldier at attention. “Affirmative. My battery has been charged and I am running at maximum efficiency. I am prepared.”

“Great! Okay, Spike, let’s get set up." She trotted over to him, looking over the list on the scroll he held. "We’ve got a speed test, a strength test, a math test--”

“And a Turing Test!” Spike exclaimed, sweeping his arm toward Turing.

Twilight made a face. “Let’s just get started, Spike.”

“Heh heh… right,” he said, chuckling to himself. Then he frowned and glanced over to her. “It’s too bad Rainbow Dash can’t help out with this.”

Twilight lowered her head. “Yeah," she replied quietly. "It really is.”

***

Earlier that day…

Twilight smiled up at Rainbow Dash from her position on the ground just below her pegasus friend’s cloud house. Her smile was warm and she craned her neck, holding her head up high.

“No,” Rainbow Dash said flatly, and with that, turned to go back in the house.

“What?!” Twilight cried. “Come on, Rainbow Dash, I could really use your help!”

Rainbow Dash turned back and shot Twilight a scowl, her eyes narrow and nose crinkled. “Look, I get you want me to make friends with your little ‘robot’ friend, or whatever you’re calling it now, but you do not need my help to put it through its paces. Pass.”

“Oh come on, Rainbow!” Twilight flew up and perched on the path of the cloud house, blocking Rainbow's way. She put a hoof on her chest. “Rarity considers her a friend now, so you know it’s not just me who likes her. I’d really appreciate it if you gave her a chance. She’s actually very nice and you know it’s important to me, so it would mean a lot if you lent me a hoof as a friend. I even told Turing all about you and how athletic and cool you are and she seemed interested in getting to know you! Pleeease?”

Rainbow hesitated, her scowl fading. She looked down and away for a moment, but then shook her head, her eyes going hard. “No, no way! You can’t butter me up to hang out with that mechanical pony. Besides, running a bunch of tests on it sounds like a real snoozefest!”

“But don’t you want to see what Turing Test can do? She’s got a lot of incredible abilities and you can be right there with me as we discover them!”

“No!” Rainbow shouted, flying over Twilight. “I’ve got a Daring Do book to read--”

“You mean re-read, don’t you?” Twilight asked, raising an eyebrow.

“--and I’d rather check that out than spend even a second watching a machine do… whatever it is you’re doing!” She huffed loudly, ignoring Twilight as she trailed her. “If you think you can make me like that thing by impressing me, then you’re wrong! Call me when it’s something I might actually care about!” And with that, she walked into her house, slamming the cloud door as loudly as she could (which wasn’t very loud at all, because, well, it was made of clouds).

Twilight gave an exasperated sigh and flew off. I really thought Rainbow Dash would want to see how powerful Turing is. I have no idea why she’s not interested, but I guess I can’t change her mind. I’ll just have to do the measurements myself without her help.

***

“Okay, Turing,” Twilight began, levitating a stopwatch from Spike's backpack, “let’s start with a speed test. Specifically, how fast you can accelerate and your top running speed.”

“Very well. I am in fact capable of measuring such speed myself.”

“Oh? Well, that’s helpful,” Twilight said. “I guess we’ll just let you do it.”

“Understood.”

Turing stepped away and scanned the area. The valley stretched a fairly long distance into the horizon, away from Ponyville. The ground was fairly level and didn’t seem to have any major obstacles, so she could run in a straight line for a long distance without needing to stop.

“Activating E-Mode.” The mechanical hiss of the pistons in her legs activating and locking into place was heard. With this extra power, she would be able to run much faster. She crouched slightly, her legs tense and ready to send her forward, just like a professional racer at the starting line. “I am ready, Twilight Sparkle. Shall I begin?”

Twilight looked down at Spike who was leaning forward eagerly and she took a deep breath. “Whenever you’re ready!”

No sooner had she said so then Turing shot forward with astonishing speed, the sound of her hooves pounding on the dirt like a machine gun. Twilight had seen Turing move quickly and do some amazing things already, but even so she could hardly believe Turing's speed. Within hardly a blink of an eye, the robot was already 100 meters away and surging forward. She sent grass and dirt behind her as she sped away until she was almost completely out of sight. Twilight was about to fly over to see what was going on when she saw that Turing had reversed course and was now speeding toward them. About fifty meters away, she stopped suddenly, turning sideways and skidding to a halt just in front of her and Spike, creating a sizable gouge in the earth as she dug in her hooves to decelerate.

Spike and Twilight just stared at her with slack jaws and bulging eyes.

“I achieved a top speed of approximately 120 kilometers per hour. I was able to achieve that speed from rest in 1.346 seconds.”

Twilight began sputtering, her jaw working as she tried to find her words.

“That’s… pretty darn fast,” Spike said breathlessly.

“That's an understatement: that’s faster than any pony can run! That’s faster than most trains can go!” Twilight exclaimed.

“I have no reference for that.”

“Well… wow, good job, Turing!” she added, putting a hoof to her forehead.

“Thank you, Twilight Sparkle. Now deactivating E-Mode to conserve power.” The same hissing sound was heard as her leg pistons disengaged.

“Uh, okay, Spike, write that speed down and then we’ll continue with the math test.”

“Ugh,” Spike said, rolling his eyes.

“I know you're not as interested, Spike, but knowing her processing and mental abilities is important too!" She turned to face Turing, smiling at her. "Turing, Spike will start timing you as soon as I ask you a question.” She looked over to Spike, who took the stopwatch from her. “As soon as you answer, he’ll stop the clock and record your time. I have the answers on these flash cards,” she levitated them up, holding them in a way to hide their contents from Turing, “just to make sure you’re getting them correct.”

“Understood.”

“I’m ready, Twilight!” Spike said, holding his finger on the button of the stopwatch.

“Okay then… Turing, let’s start with a simple one. What is 4 plus 4?”

Click

“Eight.”

Click.

“Less than one second. Heh,” Spike said. “That was easy.”

“Not surprising. Let’s try a tough one. What is 385 times 6?”

Click.

“2310.”

Click.

“Um, less than one second again, Twilight.”

“Not bad, not bad. What is 4249 divided by 8?”

Click.

“531.125.”

Click.

“Wow," Spike said.

“Yeah, wow, that was fast!” Twilight exclaimed. “You’re really great at math, and without even using an abacus.”

“This may not be an efficient means of testing my capability, Twilight Sparkle. I am capable of calculating most general mathematical equations in an amount of time that would seem instantaneous. In fact, I can perform a large number of calculations simultaneously with no drop in performance whatsoever.”

“How large a number?” Twilight asked.

“The upper limit is unknown, but 1 million calculations in one second is certainly possible.”

Twilight gawked. “One million?!”

“Likely far more. That was a low estimation.”

Spike dropped the stopwatch, looking utterly dumbstruck. Finally he said, “I’m not sure we can ask her that many math problems today.”

“I am capable of performing a far greater number of basic operations as part of my synthetic neural processes. While the exact nature of my inner workings is unknown, I am able to estimate my abilities. It allows me to simulate the workings of a biological brain such as counting by sight and the memory of events. However, due to its precise nature, I am capable of exact measurements and perfect memory. Example: we passed exactly 14 ponies on the way here and that tree directly behind you has 30,472 leaves on it.”

Twilight and Spike gawked at her.

Spike looked back over his shoulder at the tree behind him. He could take all day trying to count the leaves and not get anywhere. “You mean you counted all that stuff on the way here?!”

“Negative. I observed my surroundings and recorded those observations. I can access any event I have experienced at any time with perfect recollection and then report information such as numerical values.”

“Amazing…” Twilight still had a hard time wrapping her head around how impressive Turing could be at times. But still, it wasn’t a real test unless she checked for limitations...

Twilight got a mischievous look on her face. “How about this… what is 10 divided by ZERO?”

The glow of Turing Test’s eyes shrank to pinpricks and for a moment her head drooped lopsidedly to the left before righting itself and her eyes returned to normal. “An error has occurred. Operation impossible. Higher cognitive function was required to terminate the calculation.” She turned to Twilight. “I will direct my program to immediately terminate impossible functions in the future. Nevertheless, it would be inadvisable to place such inquiries in the future, Twilight Sparkle.”

“Ahahaha… er, sorry, Turing,” Twilight said sheepishly, looking away as if chastised by an angry parent. “Let’s just go on to the next test. This time, let’s try a strength test!”

Right on schedule, their new assistant arrived. The sound of trotting and the rumble and rattle of something heavy and metal inside a wooden cart could be heard long before he arrived. Finally, the sight of a very large white pegasus stallion was visible as he rounded the corner and hauled his cart into the clearing.

“I’M READY TO ROCK!” Bulk Biceps shouted excitedly. “LET’S DO THIS, METAL PONY!”

“Clarification needed,” Turing replied. “What do you require of me, Twilight Sparkle?”

Twilight swept her arm over at Bulk Biceps. “Turing, this is Bulk Biceps. With the possible exception of Big McIntosh, he's the strongest pony in town.”

“YEAH!!”

Twilight flinched at the muscular pony’s sudden outburst, but continued. “He has generously agreed to help us by bringing his weight-lifting equipment, so we can test your leg power.”

“Let’s see what you got, robot!” Bulk Biceps shouted excitedly. He got right in Turing's face. “Are you ready?!”

“Affirmative,” Turing replied.

“Come on, I can’t hear you!” Bulk shouted. “Louder, like this: YEAH!”

“Affirmative.”

Twilight winced. It was no more excited, but certainly louder. "Um, I think that's--"

“NO, COME ON, LET’S HEAR IT! YYEEAAAHHH!!”

Turing adjusted her volume to a considerably higher level and replied:

“AFIIIIIRRRMATIIIIIIIVVE.”

Birds scattered from trees and the others covered their ears as the sound rang out, loud enough to be heard for miles.

“Was that sufficient?” Turing asked, returning her voice to normal.

“WHAT??” Bulk Biceps asked, rubbing his ears,which were still ringing. “I MEAN… er, yeah. That was fine,” he said more quietly.

With that, he began to take the equipment and weights out of his cart and prepared to set things up for the test.

“Okay, Turing Test, activate E-Mode again and we’ll try to figure out just how strong you really are!” Twilight exclaimed excitedly.

***

Rainbow Dash had been reading her book when the loudest utterance of the word “affirmative” in Equestrian history blasted through her open window and startled her so badly she nearly fell out of bed.

“What the hay was that?!” she exclaimed, slamming her book down on the table by her bed. She stuck her head out her window, snarling and gritting her teeth as she scanned around for the perpetrator. She couldn’t see exactly what was going on, but her eyes were good enough to spot Twilight, Turing Test, Spike, and Bulk Biceps in a valley on the other side of Ponyville. Grumbling about the disturbance, but still somewhat curious, she fetched a pair of binoculars and looked again.

“What are they doing? Bench presses? That’s the stupidest…”

And then she froze. Bulk Biceps lifted a fairly heavy-looking dumbell with his forelegs on his bench. He appeared to be straining, but then she saw Turing Test get on it and do it easily. Then she did it again with just one hoof. Twilight was saying something excitedly and they added even more weight with no change in results.

“...whoa, how much weight is that? Maybe if I got closer--”

She stopped herself. That’s right. I’m not interested. That’s what I told Twilight. There’s no reason for me to care. She went back to her book and was about to pick it up when she hesitated. Buuut, maybe just a quick look over there wouldn’t hurt. Yeah, just a quick look and that’s it. Just out of curiosity. Yeah. I’ll go hide out on that cloud and watch for a minute, then come back here before anypony sees me.

And with that, Rainbow Dash zoomed out the window toward the valley.

***

“Well, great, we’re out of things to lift, Turing.”

“Shall I find more things to lift?”

“I don’t see the point,” Twilight said, looking over the numbers she’d written down. “You lifted as much as Bulk Biceps and I could get on the barbell, then we put it all back in the cart and lifted the entire thing and then we even put all of us on top of it!

Uh, just for the record, how much do you weigh, Bulk?”

“I PREFER NOT TO SAY. MODESTY FORBIDS!”

“Fair enough.” Twilight sighed. “Unfortunately, we didn’t get close to your limit, but what you lifted has got to be over three metric tons. And you can lift that much using only two hooves: forelegs or hind legs.”

“I AM HUMBLED, YET IMPRESSED! YEAH!”

“Well, on the bright side, at least you’ve got a new fan,” Spike said, thumbing at Bulk Biceps.

Turing looked to Bulk Biceps, who was smiling, then back to Spike. “Understood.”

“All right, Turing," Twilight said, "let’s move on to towing capacity.”

This was going to be trickier. It was harder to lift something than it was to pull it, especially on wheels. Bulk Biceps managed to haul all of his equipment on his cart, after all, even if he was unable to vertically lift that much. “Spike’s going to tie this magically-enhanced rope around you and then tie one end to a force gauge. You’ll be pulling against something else.”

Bulk Biceps looked at Twilight and gestured to himself questioningly.

“No, not you Bulk,” Twilight assured him, waving a hoof. “No offense, but we're going to need something with even more power than you can muster. I’m going to use my magic to try to hold the force gauge in place while Turing Test is pulling in the opposite direction. I’ll hold it until she can’t pull it any further.”

Spike finished tying the force gauge to Turing.

“Okay, Turing, are you ready?”

“Affirmative, Twilight Sparkle.”

“Good! Okay, start walking!”

Twilight tried to hold the gauge in place, her magic engulfing it and holding it firmly, but Turing very casually started to drag it in the opposite direction.

“That’s three tons, Twilight!” Spike said, watching the number on the mechanical gauge continue to climb.

Okay, let’s keep going, she said to herself and increased her magical hold on it. She kept doing that until she was was really starting to strain. Turing began to slow and her light trot became a methodical trudging.

“S-seven tons!” he said in disbelief.

Twilight grit her teeth and exerted herself further. Finally, Turing came to a stop, her hooves only digging grooves into the earth without going anywhere. “That’s it, Spike, what’s it at?”

“It’s… ten and a half, on the dot! Ten and a half tons!”

“Roger! Okay, Turing, stop!” The robot pony complied as Twilight took out her scroll. “Okay, writing it down. Whew, I haven’t had to use that much magical force since I lifted that Ursa Minor!” She wiped the sweat from her brow with her foreleg.

“Is that the last test?” Spike asked.

“Well, maybe just one more. Um…” She looked around and spotted a tall tree standing among several others. “Turing?”

“Yes, Twilight Sparkle?”

Twilight pointed at the tree. “I need to get some idea of how much force you can muster at once. I want you to go to that tree over there and buck it as hard as you can.”

“Understood. Commencing diagnostic of kicking power.” She walked up to the tree and looked at it for a moment, up and down, then turned back toward Twilight and the others. “One moment, Twilight Sparkle. I detect the presence of an avian nest in the branches of this tree. While not occupied at this moment, it is possible that the bird may return. The neighboring tree is unoccupied. Shall I alter my target?”

Twilight raised her head and blinked. “Oh. Yes, of course, Turing. That’s fine.” Twilight looked over to Spike, who was smiling, and she returned it, but she had to admit that she wasn’t prepared for Turing to take the time to consider the well-being of an animal. She’d never told her to do that. In fact, she hadn’t even thought about the tree having birds living in it, but she put that out of mind for now and continued watching.

Turing walked over to the second tree and turned her back to it, getting into position. Once she was ready, she reared up onto her forelegs and aimed her hind legs at the tree. Then, with all the force she could muster she bucked with both legs into the trunk.

The whole party gasped and some even had to shield their eyes as the tree seemed to explode in a cloud of splinters, bark, and leaves that radiated out in a cloud of debris. When they looked again, they saw that the stump of the tree remained, but most of the trunk had been completely obliterated and was lying in chunks that littered the small copse of trees.

“Twilight, look!” Spike shouted, pointing into the sky.

Twilight looked and could barely believe her eyes. The top part of the tree with its uppermost branches was flying through the air, almost a hundred meters up, and was tumbling end-over-end in an arc. Gravity took over and the remnant of the tree crashed to the earth a good distance from where it had once been.

“Wow.” Twilight didn’t know what else to say. She’d known Turing was strong enough to break rocks with her hooves, but that wasn’t totally unheard of even for some earth ponies. But such sudden force was…

“THAT WAS AWESOME!!” Bulk Biceps yelled, startling both Twilight and Spike, who’d momentarily somewhat forgotten he was there.

“Well, when he’s right, he’s right,” Spike said, and started to applaud. “Turing, you’re incredible!”

Turing walked over and shook the dust and splinters from her body. “Your collective awe at my abilities is puzzling. I am merely demonstrating my physical limits for the purpose of assessment. Twilight Sparkle, can you provide information on why physical displays can be sources of amazement or delight? Without experiences with either emotion, the response seems illogical to me.”

“Uhhh, that might be hard to explain, actually,” Twilight replied, not even knowing where to start.

“Understood. I will endeavor to learn more. I may be able to gain information through interactions with those observing me today. Spike the Dragon, Bulk Biceps, or Rainbow Dash may be able to provide additional information.”

“Yeah, I guess-- wait, Rainbow Dash? She’s not here.”

“Incorrect. She is observing us from a cloud directly overhead.” She pointed her hoof straight up.

They all looked up and were just in time to see Rainbow Dash duck her head back behind the cloud she was perching on.

“HI, RAINBOW DASH!” Bulk Biceps yelled, waving and smiling obliviously.

“Rainbow Dash?!” Twilight exclaimed, her voice accentuated by both surprise and a bit of anger. “What are you doing up there, I thought you didn’t want to come at all! Why are you watching us?”

Rainbow sighed and came down off of her cloud, landing amongst everyone. “Uh… hey,” she said sheepishly.

“How long have you been there?” Twilight demanded, going nose-to-nose with her.

“She has been observing us for the last 20 minutes, shortly after we began my lifting assessment.”

“Tattle-tail,” Rainbow Dash grumbled.

"Incorrect. My name is Turing Test."

Twilight rolled her eyes. “Okay, Rainbow Dash, what’s going on here? I think you owe me an explanation.”

“Okay, see,” she began, looking off to the side, “I admit I was lying when I said watching you test your robot’s strength sounded boring. Then I heard her yelling something and looked out the window and I just couldn’t resist when I saw her lifting all that stuff.”

“If you felt that way, why didn’t you just come when I asked?”

“Because I knew you weren’t asking me just because you thought I’d be interested,” Rainbow said, narrowing her eyes. “I knew you wanted me to come because you thought I’d go all fangirl and want to be friends with that robot just because she’s strong.” She started hovering in the air and looked down at Twilight pointedly. “Am I right?”

The others also looked to her and Twilight squirmed under their collective gaze. “Um… somewhat.”

“That’s what I thought,” Rainbow Dash said. She sighed. “Look, I’m not mad or anything,” she added, her tone more conciliatory, “and I’ll stay and help today if you want, but you can forget about me making friends with her. I’m not going to bond with her over how strong she is.”

“Why not?” Spike asked. “You love seeing other ponies show off how tough they are.”

“Because she was just built that way,” Rainbow said, pointing at Turing Test. “It’s sort of cool, but it’s not that impressive if that’s what she was just designed to do.”

“That does not seem relevant,” Turing remarked, startling Rainbow. “Biological ponies likewise have innate abilities and talents from birth.”

“Yeah, but then they have to work on it and perfect it and get better at it,” Rainbow Dash shot back. “You don’t!”

Twilight looked away, remembering how, when she thought Turing had perfected magic without any effort, it had irritated her tremendously. She couldn’t exactly disagree with Rainbow Dash’s point.

“Take me, for instance,” she said, flying even higher and doing a loop for show. “I had to work hard for years to get as awesome as I am. And now I’m one of the fastest and best fliers in Equestria!”

“That is useful information,” Turing Test said, looking up at her. “How long have you been a member of the Wonderbolts?”

Rainbow froze, her eyes first going wide, then narrowing coldly. “What did you just say?”

“Clarifying: Twilight Sparkle’s book on the history of the Wonderbolts indicated that they are a group of the best fliers in Equestria,” Turing said. “You indicated that you met such a qualification. Therefore, logically, you must be a member of the Wonderbolts.”

Twilight and Spike were both motioning at Turing to be quiet.

“Twilight Sparkle and Spike the Dragon, are you both suffering from neurological muscle spasms?”

“Ohhh Turing!” Twilight groaned, putting her hoof to her forehead.

“I don’t like your tone, robot!” Rainbow Dash shouted. Her eyes were hard and her nostrils flared. “You think you’re so tough?!”

“My durability is very high.”

“You think you’re hot stuff?!”

“My hull can reach high temperatures in direct sunlight.”

Rainbow’s frustration was boiling over and she grit her teeth. “Well, then, can you do this?”

She took to the air and flew off quite a distance, enough to where even Turing lost sight of her. Then she came rocketing toward them, overhead, picking up speed until…

“Uh oh… Spike, Bulk, cover your ears!” Twilight shouted, realizing what Rainbow was attempting.

Turing continued to watch as Rainbow Dash - now just a rainbow-colored streak - soared over them when there was a very loud sound, like an explosion, and a circular ring of multicolored light radiated outward, followed by a rumbling shockwave that blew back their manes (or scales in Spike’s case).

“Still amazing as ever,” Spike breathed. Twilight and Bulk Biceps nodded as well, and even Bulk was speechless at the dazzling sight.

A moment later, Rainbow Dash returned to the ground, tossing her mane back proudly. “Ha! What do you think about that?”

“Unknown.”

“Huh?” Rainbow asked, confused by the simple response.

“Clarifying: You previously asked if I was capable of such a feat. The manipulation of light in such a fashion is beyond my capabilities, but if you reference the ability to fly at supersonic speeds, that is unknown. I have yet to utilize or assess my pegasus-mode.”

“Your… what?”

“I will demonstrate. Switching to P-Mode.” Turing lowered her head and a panel on her back lifted slightly. With a loud clack-clack-clack sound, a pair of brass-colored wings sprouted out horizontally, then raised into an elevated V-like position. She raised her head and stood there, her bright wings reflecting light on the ground as they gleamed in the sun.

Rainbow blinked, then turned back to Twilight. “Okay, not going to lie: that was pretty awesome.”

Twilight grinned smugly.

Rainbow Dash shook her head and turned back to Turing. “But that still doesn’t mean anything to me! I bet I could beat the pants off you any day of the week!”

“I do not wear pants on any day of the week.”

“Are you being smart with me?”

“Affirmative: I possess high cognitive function.”

“Then how about we see what you’re made of!”

“I am composed of titanium alloy among many other--”

“Gah, just shut up! I mean I can defeat you in a race!” Rainbow Dash shouted.

Twilight’s eyes popped open. “A r-race? Oh, Rainbow Dash, I don’t know if--”

“A competitive race would provide a sufficient opportunity to assess my flight capabilities, Twilight Sparkle. Am I correct?”

"W-well, I mean..." Twilight looked to Spike and Bulk Biceps for help. Spike just shrugged and Bulk Biceps actually looked excited.

“A RACE SOUNDS AWESOME! I GOTTA TELL EVERYPONY SO THEY CAN WATCH!”

“Now wait a minute!” Twilight cried.

Rainbow Dash wasn’t as hesitant. “Ha! That’s a great idea, Bulk Biceps!” She turned back to Turing Test. “All right, robot: I challenge you to a race! What do you say to that?”

Turing stepped forward, and though neither her unchanging face nor the tone of her level synthetic voice gave any indication of emotion, Twilight couldn’t help but detect an edge to her simple reply: “Challenge accepted.”

To be continued...

Aerodynamic

View Online

Scootaloo pulled up to the crowd of ponies gathered on a tall hill just outside of town. She parked her scooter, hanging her helmet on the handlebars, before eagerly pushing through a veritable forest of legs to see if she could find her idol. Fortunately for her, Rainbow Dash was making sure that absolutely everypony saw her strutting and revving the crowd up.

“Come on, everypony!” she was saying, hovering overhead to be as visible as possible. “This is your chance to see! Mare vs Machine!”

“Rainbow Dash!” Scootaloo exclaimed, eagerly flapping her wings as she bounded forward. “I heard you’re going to race Twilight’s robot! Uh… Turing Test, that’s it! Is it true?”

“Guess everypony heard!” Rainbow Dash said, loud enough for the entire crowd to hear her. “But in case you all just showed up... yes it is true! I’m going to race a robot!” She landed and ruffled Scootaloo’s mane affectionately, quietly adding, “And I’m glad you came, squirt.”

“Good luck in the race, Rainbow Dash!” she cried.

“Thanks. I won’t need it, but thanks!”

Scootaloo didn’t think she could be more excited, but then she always loved to watch Rainbow Dash compete. Then she looked and saw Twilight and Turing Test a short distance away. Twilight did not look anywhere near as enthusiastic as Rainbow Dash. Since Twilight had been tutoring her during Twilight Time, it seemed wrong to not cheer her and Turing on as well, so she approached the pair of them.

Twilight was pacing back and forth and muttering to herself. Turing Test was doing nothing but standing there.

“Um, hi there, Twilight!” Scootaloo said, trying to get Twilight’s attention.

“Huh? Oh, uh, hello Scootaloo,” Twilight said, stopping to take in the sight of her. “I guess you’re here to watch the race… just like everypony else…”

“Yeah, I… um, are you okay?”

Twilight looked around, shifting her eyes nervously. “Maybe. But if things go wrong or… or there’s another lightning strike… No, no, no thunderclouds today...” She seemed to forget that Scootaloo was there and went back to pacing.

Scootaloo looked over to Turing. She approached the robot pony nervously, but decided that it would only be right to wish her luck too, since she was the one actually racing Rainbow Dash.

“Um.. h-hey, Turing Test!” she said hesitantly.

Turing swiveled her head around to stare at the little orange filly.

She paused for a moment, startled by Turing's rapid movement and the sudden stare of her glowing eyes. “I wanted to wish you good luck in the race!”

Turing didn’t seem to understand at first and said nothing. Her ears moved slightly on their hinges, squeaking gently as they did so, before she replied, “Understood. You are following polite social convention by expressing well-wishes for the competitors.”

“I… think so, yeah,” Scootaloo replied.

“Am I to understand that you favor my chances in the race?”

Scootaloo looked away and laughed nervously as she rubbed the back of her neck. “Actually, I’m sorry, but I think Rainbow Dash will win. Or at least I hope she wins.”

Turing's ears twitched again. “I do not understand how the outcome benefits you in a way that you would have preference. Please clarify.”

“I guess it doesn’t really do anything for me… but if she wins, it’ll make Rainbow Dash happy, and she’s my big sister!”

“Understood. In truth, I am uncertain of the outcome. I believe it will be a good means of testing my abilities while comparing them to those of a biological pony. Rainbow Dash displays high physical prowess.”

“That’s true. You’ll have to fly pretty fast to beat her!”

Then Twilight interrupted this with another outburst. “She could overheat! She might catch on fire! Oh no, oh no no no…!”

Scootaloo realized that Twilight was still talking to herself and returned her attention to Turing. “What’s wrong with Twilight?”

“Twilight Sparkle seems to be concerned about my participation in the race,” Turing replied. “Because my flight capabilities have never been utilized, she worries that I will be incapable or become damaged. She also worries that other ponies will ridicule me if I fail to defeat Rainbow Dash. Paradoxically, she also fears that Rainbow Dash will become hostile if I am successful in defeating her.”

“Wait a minute... you're going to fly? I heard it was a race, but I thought it was a race on hoof!”

“Incorrect. My running capability has been assessed as far beyond that of any biological pony. My flight has never been tested, and although I have data instructing me how to fly, I have yet to fly in actuality.”

“I didn’t even know you could fly!” Scootaloo exclaimed. The little filly peered around Turing, frowning as she looked along Turing's body. “Well, where are your wings?”

“One moment: I will display them. Switching to P-Mode.”

Scootaloo jumped back as the wings appeared once again, clattering as they emerged from her back and locked into position.

“Whoa…” Scootaloo breathed.

The crowd of ponies had been focused on Rainbow Dash, who was showboating and already proclaiming her inevitable victory, but the sight of the shiny metallic wings suddenly got their attention and an awestruck “Oooh!” swelled up from them as they turned and approached her.

“Wow, look at those!” a mare exclaimed.

“Can she really fly on those? Cool!” a stallion asked excitedly.

More and more questions and cheers were tossed out and suddenly Twilight came back to reality when she realized the focus had turned back to Turing.

“N-now careful, everypony! Please remember that Turing Test has never actually flown before!”

“And that’s only one reason why she’s gonna lose!” Rainbow Dash growled, angry that Turing had inadvertently stolen the attention away from her. “Enough waiting around, this crowd is big enough!” She turned to Turing and grinned. “What do you say, robot? Are you ready to get this show on the road?”

“Where we are going, we do not need roads.”

The crowd laughed at that and Rainbow Dash narrowed her eyes, none of them realizing that Turing was not trying to be clever.

“Ooh, ooh, Rainbow Dash!” Scootaloo cried, getting her idol’s attention. “Can I be the one to hold the flag and start the race? Pleeeeasse?”

“Ha! Of course!” She then took to the air, hovering above everypony, preparing to lay down the course and rules of the race.

A cheer went up from the crowd as they realized the race was about to start.

“The race is from here, around the peak of Dragon’s Fang Mountain,” Rainbow Dash began, pointing to the peak of the mountain in the distance, “then over the Everfree forest and touching the flagpole on top of the Castle of the Two Sisters. After that, it's back over Ponyville to ring the bell at the Ponyville Clocktower, and finally back here, busting the cloud above the crowd to end the race!” She pointed to the solitary white cloud placed above them.

From the hill on which they stood, it would be easy to see the competitors as they completed each leg of the race. The course was a vague rhombus shape and the circuit would take them over most of Ponyville, especially when they reached the Clocktower. Turing looked over each landmark and started to analyze the course to determine the best way to approach them.

“Any questions, robot?” Rainbow Dash asked, giving her a taunting sideways glance.

“No clarification is required.”

“And her name is Turing Test, not ‘robot,’ Rainbow Dash,” Twilight Sparkle added, making a face.

“All right, all right, if that’s what you want, Twi,” she replied, holding up her hooves in mock surrender.

Twilight motioned for Turing Test to come closer to talk to her one more time, privately, before the race. “Turing, listen: you don’t have to do this. I mean, I hate to say it, but I think everypony here is hoping Rainbow Dash wins.”

Turing cocked her head to the side and Twilight knew she didn’t understand. “That is irrelevant.”

“Maybe, maybe not,” she said, “but that doesn’t change the fact that I still think this is dangerous.”

“Do not worry, Twilight Sparkle. My systems are all operating normally. I have more than enough battery power, even after this morning’s assessments, to complete this race. I will take no unnecessary risk that would cause injury to Rainbow Dash, myself, or others. However, if you forbid my participation, then I will comply.”

Twilight hesitated, but she realized that dropping out now that things had gone this far would reflect badly on her and Turing alike. And part of her, however tiny, was annoyed at Rainbow for her treatment of Turing Test and wanted to wipe that grin off her face.

“Okay, Turing, let’s see you race,” she said finally, giving her a confident grin. Then she leaned in, quietly adding “Just don’t go easy on her.”

“Understood.”

“Are we going to talk all day or are we gonna race?!” Rainbow shouted, landing and placing herself at the starting line.

Turing walked over to the starting line as well. “We will race.”

“Ha! That’s what I wanted to hear!”

“However, I must caution you and those gathered,” she added. “My wings work on jet propulsion. Please avoid positioning yourself in close proximity directly behind me or you may be injured by streams of heated air.”

“Good to know,” Dash said, polishing a hoof on her chest before examining it disinterestedly, “but don’t worry. I don’t think I’ll have to worry about being behind you.”

They both got into position, knees bent. Scootaloo took up a spot before them. She was about to give the countdown when they all heard a sound. It started as a low whine, but then they all saw that Turing Test had started the jets in her wings, warming them up and preparing them for takeoff. The sound of them running was surprisingly loud and they kicked up the grass and dirt behind her as she revved them up to speed. When she took off, it would be easy to boost them high enough to propel herself forwards.

This might be tougher than I thought if she doesn’t need to flap! Rainbow thought, although outwardly she gave no sign of worry. I thought she was going to try flapping those metal wings, but if she’s got jets then…

“Racers, on your marks!” Scootaloo said, holding up the flag as she stood on two legs. “Get set…” They readied their legs, preparing for takeoff. “GO!!”

The flag came down and Rainbow Dash burst forward into the air. Turing Test leaped into the air as well, her jets going on full blast, likewise propelling her forward. Rainbow had the lead at the start, but Turing rapidly accelerated and was soon flying far faster than the crowd had expected her to go.

The race was on.

***

Rainbow Dash had launched herself with both her legs and her wings and rapidly accelerated to a solid cruising speed. The mountain was dead ahead and she knew that even at this speed she would leave almost any other pegasus in the dust behind her.

That robot is waaay too heavy to catch up, jets or no jets! she reasoned. Plus I was already half a kilometer ahead of her before she barely left the starting line! This is going to be a... wait, what’s that sound?

He ears twitched and she risked a glance backward as a steady, high-pitched rumble and whine got louder and louder. Sure enough, Turing Test was behind her. And she was catching up quickly.

Faster than I thought! Rainbow realized, turning her attention back to the race. She didn’t want to burn too much energy at the start, but she’d need to keep her lead. She didn’t want to let a machine pass her for even a second. With that in mind, she began to flap her wings even harder and sped up.

Turing, by contrast, had been accelerating the whole time and found she was still able to go faster. Catching up to Rainbow Dash would not be difficult, according to her calculations. But going faster than Rainbow was not the real problem.

Estimating aerial maneuverability… unable to match that of Rainbow Dash. Turing’s systems reworked the math and she adjusted her strategy on the fly. Adjusting course and flight path to compensate.

The peak of the mountain was getting closer and judging by how nimble Rainbow Dash was in the air, it was likely that she would simply go right around it at a sharp angle and speed toward the next target at the Castle of the Two Sisters. But Turing could not perform such a sudden change in direction without a massive sacrifice in speed; her weight and momentum were simply too great. There was only one solution…

Rainbow heard the sound of Turing’s jets get quieter and naturally assumed that she was falling behind. But a glint of sunlight on metal caught her peripheral vision and she saw that in fact Turing was moving away, but to the side. She was curving away from the straight path.

What the hay is she doing?! Why would she take the long path away from the mountain?

What Rainbow hadn’t realized was that Turing was actually going faster than she was, but rather than going straight at the peak, she was taking a longer curve around it. Rainbow approached the peak and made a hairpin turn, while Turing banked around it in a long, sweeping path. But as Rainbow made the turn, she saw that Turing was returning to a straighter path and getting closer. Without sacrificing her speed, Turing was closing the gap between them.

“You think that’s going to work?!” Rainbow Dash yelled. She grinned. That won’t work on the next leg! You have to touch the flagpole and can’t just bank around it: good luck not losing any speed on that!

***

The pegasi had the best view of the race as they hovered over the crowd at the hill. Several of them were sporting binoculars. They watched as Turing took the long curve around the peak, but to their surprise, her extra speed made it so she went around it at the exact same time as Rainbow Dash, just at a wider turn.

“They’re both around the peak!” one of them yelled. “Looks like neither one’s got a sure lead yet!”

The crowd yelled excitedly. The two dots in the distance, the shining metal one and colorful rainbow streak, were now heading for the skies over the Everfree Forest, and beyond that was the Castle of the Two Sisters.

***

Rainbow grit her teeth as she saw that Turing’s path was coming closer to her own. And as they got closer, she realized something else and it chilled her even worse than the fierce wind in her face:

Turing was still speeding up. A few seconds later, it became clear that the mechanical pony had passed her!

Calculating, Turing’s systems told her. Flagpole is a small target. Banking to conserve speed is inefficient. Evaluating options…

Rainbow Dash didn’t seem to have many options either. A straight path was the only real path she could take. She could just surge forward, then put on the brakes and tap the flagpole with her back hooves and spring off it…

No, no, that’ll slow me down too much! Rainbow Dash realized, shaking her head. She’s still going way too fast. If I slow down to hit the pole, she’ll increase her lead! Think, Rainbow, think! How can I touch that pole without losing speed?!

Then it hit her. A sly grin spread across her face as they lowered their altitude and the trees of the Everfree became visible. The ruins of the castle were now in sight and she could spot the details of the crumbling courtyard and dilapidated towers. And best of all, Turing was slowing down.

Adjusting flight speed, Turing’s systems informed her. She decided that she would have to time the rate of deceleration so that she could touch the flagpole and turn around as fast as possible. There was no other way that she could determine.

Rainbow suddenly soared right by Turing as she was slowing. While Turing intended to slow down and fire her jets in retrograde to touch the flagpole and rapidly accelerate, Dash wasn’t slowing down at all.

Rainbow stuck out her hoof as she zoomed toward the flagpole. Rather than merely touching the flagpole and springing off it, she hooked her foreleg around it and swung around, letting her momentum slingshot her toward her next target.

Turing watched as Rainbow surged onward, flippantly saluting as she sped away. It was too late to adjust her own strategy as she turned around, letting her jets slow her down just enough to tap the flagpole before reversing direction.

Lead lost. Recalculating… odds of loss now at 80%. Adjusting strategy…

***

“Rainbow Dash is in the lead! Oh my gosh, she just swung around that flagpole without slowing down at all!”

“Woohoo, all right Rainbow Dash!” Scootaloo screamed.

The crowd erupted in cheers. Twilight had taken flight as well and was watching the two racers uneasily. Oh, Turing, what are you going to do now? You can’t change directions as fast as Rainbow and you’ll have to slow down to hit the bell! Rainbow’s just too good a racer…

***

Rainbow knew she had it in the bag. She was worried she’d have to go supersonic, and that would give her plenty of speed, but it also burned a lot of energy and left her exhausted. A Sonic Rainboom was therefore a great stunt, but not necessarily a great racing technique unless you didn’t have far to go.

The Ponyville Clocktower was dead ahead, just a few kilometers away. It was a straight shot, so she aimed right for the bell. She would slow down at the last second, ring the bell, then blast off toward the finish line. Sure, she had to slow down since she couldn’t swing around that heavy bell like she could the flagpole, but then Turing would have to do the same, and she couldn’t accelerate as fast as Rainbow Dash.

But just then, she heard a sound overhead and looked up with astonishment.

Turing Test was directly over her, the jets in her wings roaring at full blast as she sped forward, taking a larger and larger lead.

Heh. Whatever, Rainbow said to herself. You still have to slow down, ya dumb robot. I’ll just pass you again like last time. The finish line isn’t that far away from the Clocktower, either, so even your speed won’t help you now!

But to Rainbow’s surprise, Turing did not slow down. She was rocketing at the Clocktower at full speed, and now she was well ahead of Rainbow. In fact, if she kept that up, she would hit the bell dead on! At that speed, a pony would break her neck!

At least, a normal pony would…

And then Rainbow realized, too late, what Turing was doing.

Turing went at the bell at full speed. She cut her jets at the very last second, folding her wings inwards and straightening her body out like an arrow. Her narrow frame went right through the support columns of the Clocktower steeple and she glanced off the side of the bell with her body, creating a loud, reverberant ringing as she ricocheted off it, her titanium hull leaving her totally undamaged from the impact. Once that was done, she spread her wings and re-started her jets, letting her momentum carry her until the power of the jets allowed her to bank and turn toward the finish line.

Some distance behind her, Rainbow Dash was trying hard to think of a way to save this race, and it wasn’t looking good.

Updating… Turing calculated. Odds of victory now at 70%...

***

“Holy smoke! Th-the robot just rammed right into that bell and kept going! She’s in the lead! She’s coming this way!”

The crowd gasped, some in awe, some (who favored Rainbow Dash) in fear, and others just fell totally silent.

Not among any of them was Twilight who couldn’t contain herself: “Go, Turing Test, go!”

She clasped her hooves over her mouth guiltily as the others looked to her.

“Er… well, I mean, they are both my friends, after all.”

A few of the other ponies in the crowd smiled at that. A few of them even began to cheer and some even began to chant: “Tur-ing-Test! Tur-ing-Test! Tur-ing-Test!”

***

Rainbow was running out of time. If she slowed down and rang the bell like she was planning to originally, Turing Test would get too far ahead and would be uncatchable. But if she tried to do what Turing did, that wouldn’t work either. Turing was made of metal, so hitting the bell even at that speed did nothing to her; in contrast, Rainbow Dash would break a rib or a hoof or a leg if she collided with the bell!

Come on, Rainbow Dash, think, think! How can you ring that bell without slowing down to touch it?! It’s impossible, totally…

Then she had a flash of inspiration. She could ring the bell without touching it. She grinned.

***

“Hey, wait, is she slowing down yet?” one of the observers of the race asked.

“No, I think… wait, she’s speeding up?!”

Twilight and Scootaloo exchanged glances. They both knew what was coming next.

***

Rainbow felt her wings practically burning as the energy in her body began to focus and she squinted into the wind. She pushed herself more and more, speeding up, pushing beyond her limits as Ponyville below her became a blur and then…

KABOOM!

Rainbow shot right by the Clocktower just as she smashed through the sound barrier. The shockwave of the Sonic Rainboom spread outward and since it was so close to the tower, the force of it rang the bell loud enough to be heard right after the thunderous explosion of her hitting Mach 1.

Now with a brilliant streak of rainbow trailing her, Dash turned rapidly and soared at the finish line, focused on the cloud placed over the cheering onlookers. But the problem was that Turing was still ahead, even if that gap was closing. And now she had expended most of her energy…

This is gonna be close!! she thought, willing herself to fight the fatigue and the burning in her wings. The two were coming at the cloud crossways and it was anypony’s guess who would reach it first.

Turing Test saw the cloud directly ahead too and had already detected that Rainbow Dash had exceeded sonic speed. She had her jets on at full power and was positioned for the least amount of wind resistance, but still she could go no faster. It was very clear at that point that, while Turing could go faster than Rainbow Dash on average for longer, her maximum speed was still subsonic. Rainbow’s absolute maximum speed was supersonic. Rainbow was slowing down from fatigue, but only slightly. Not even Turing could calculate the winner of the race at that point. The two were practically on a collision course.

The crowd held its breath collectively as the two racers surged at them, the screaming sound of them cutting through the wind growing exponentially louder until they were both right there and the crowd stared up at the cloud and watched as…

...Rainbow Dash, by barely a meter, burst through the small cloud, busting it and winning the race.

To be continued...

Priority Queue, Part 1

View Online

Rainbow fluttered down to the crowd amid uproarious cheers and stomping. She was panting and sweat drenched her body, but she lifted her head to offer a victorious grin to the onlookers. She’d flown like a champion and pushed herself as hard as she could have, but in the end she’d won. She’d managed to defeat that machine and proven herself. Despite her tiredness, she couldn’t help but feel elated, even more than usual after winning a race. She waved to the crowd and their cheering became even louder.

Just then, she heard the sound of jets and turned to see Turing landing. She came down vertically from hovering and, once she stood firmly on her hooves, she folded her wings back into her body. They clattered and there was the hiss of hydraulics as the panel on her back resealed itself.

“Rainbow Dash!” Scootaloo cried as she pushed her way through the crowd. “You did it! You were amazing! That was the greatest race I’ve ever seen!”

“Heh. Thanks, little sis,” Rainbow said, smiling down at her biggest fan. “That wasn’t easy, but…” she stopped momentarily, as she was still trying to catch her breath, “...but it’ll take more than jets to beat me!”

With Spike in tow, Twilight had come over to Turing and was smiling at her. “You did very well, Turing. You almost won!” Likewise, Spike gave Turing a thumbs up.

“Correct. I believe I have accurately assessed my abilities in flight. Shall I report my findings to you?”

“No, we can do that later,” Twilight said, glancing over to Rainbow Dash, whose gaze locked with hers even as the crowd around them nearly drowned them out with their cheers and clamoring to congratulate Rainbow.

Her expression turning serious, Rainbow Dash gently pushed through her admirers to approach Turing Test. The crowd went silent as the two competitors came face to face.

“So,” Rainbow said slowly, raising an eyebrow, “pretty close race out there, wasn’t it?”

“Affirmative. I was unable to overcome the combination of your speed and strategy.”

“Yeah, well," she began, polishing a hoof on her coat, examining it nonchalantly, "I guess you were pretty good too.”

The crowd seemed to gasp in unison and even Twilight was surprised at the sudden compliment. Rainbow cringed and her eyes darted around.

Oh my gosh! Twilight exclaimed mentally. Rainbow has learned to respect her! Now they’ll bond and become friends and--

“--B-but you're still not good enough to beat me!” Dash added quickly, launching herself into the air and looking down at Turing. She grinned and added, “I guess flesh and blood ponies still have the edge on metal ones! But don’t worry, maybe one day they’ll build a faster version of you!” She laughed, drawing a smattering of mutual laughs from the crowd and a scowl from Twilight. “Until then, I’m out! Thanks for coming to the show, everypony!”

And with that, she flew off, leaving them all behind.

The crowd began to dissipate and Twilight put her hoof on Turing’s shoulder, getting her attention.

“Um, sorry about that, Turing,” Twilight said.

“I do not understand. For what action are you apologizing, Twilight Sparkle?”

“No, not me, I mean--”

“Miss Turing Test!” Scootaloo cried, bounding over. “Hey, I just wanted to say that you did really great in the race!”

Turing cocked her head at Scootaloo. “You stated earlier that you favored Rainbow Dash in the race. Has that position changed?”

“Huh? Oh, no,” Scootaloo replied with a nervous laugh. Then she smiled up at her. “I just mean that you did really well. I still wanted Rainbow Dash to win, but I can’t believe how close it was! You’re really amazing!”

Turing was quiet for a moment except for the squeaking of her ears as she processed this.

“Understood,” she said. “Thank you for your compliment on my performance.”

Then another voice shouted “Yeah, you kicked some serious tail out there, Turing Test!”

And another: “That was awesome! Your robot friend is pretty cool, Princess Twilight!”

One by one, a small portion of the original crowd stepped forward to congratulate Turing on the race. Turing seemed to finally understand the social convention of thanking ponies for complimenting her, even though she didn’t seem to understand why they were doing so.

Twilight smiled at the sight. Even though it was nice to see ponies accepting Turing and even treating her as an equal, she couldn’t help but feel a bit saddened by Rainbow not doing the same.

***

Back at her house, Rainbow Dash collapsed onto her bed, her Daring Do book still open on the table next to it. She had already caught her breath and her heart rate had returned to normal, but the intense adrenaline rush from the race still lingered.

She sat up and raised her hooves, staring at them as she gingerly flexed her wings. She couldn’t keep them still; she was still too tense.

That was too close, she said to herself. That robot almost beat me! If I had lost, then… oh jeez, it’s already stronger than any normal pony, but… I worked my whole life to be the best racer ever! If it beat me, if something other ponies built could beat me, then that would mean…

She flopped back onto the bed and rolled over, scrunching herself inward and shutting her eyes. I don’t even wanna think about it!

***

Not long after the race, Twilight and Spike were in the study putting the finishing touches on their report to Gadget.

“Let’s see, we’ve got her running speed, her calculations, her lifting power,” Twilight was saying, “and her kicking strength!”

“Not to mention you got to describe that awesome race!” Spike added. “I really thought Turing was going to win for a minute there!”

Twilight smiled weakly at that. “It was a good race and I’m glad that a lot of the spectators took the time to congratulate Turing Test,” she said as she used her magic to fold the letter and deposit it in an envelope. “I just wish that Rainbow Dash had been a little more of a good sport.”

“Yeah, that was a little weird,” Spike said. “She’s a hotshot, but she’s not usually so…”

“Rude?”

Spike made a face as he mulled that over. “Not exactly rude, just… well, is it just me or has she been acting weird?” Spike took the letter from Twilight and scrawled an address on it before applying a postage stamp.

“It isn’t just you,” Twilight replied. “She didn’t want to help me measure Turing’s strength, but then tried to watch without us knowing anyway. And then she seemed really impressed and wanted to race and even told her it was a good race, but then she had to say… that.”

(“...maybe one day they’ll build a faster version of you!”)

Something about that was just so dismissive, so harsh, and it really irritated Twilight to hear one of her best friends say that to her new companion.

Not that Turing Test seemed to mind.

“Are you delivering the report to the Post Office, Spike the Dragon?” Turing Test asked as Spike passed the little room where Turing had taken up residence.

“Yep. It’s not too late in the day, but I want to get over there for the afternoon mail pickup,” he said. He and Twilight poked their heads into the small room. “Hey, this room is really, um… coming together. I guess.”

Twilight looked over the area and was inclined to disagree. There was the mirror Turing had been looking in the other day, her crank-operated generator, and a can of metal polish Rarity had brought over for her (apparently it was the least she could do after being unable to provide a fresh coat of paint) laid on a table. There was no bed, no wardrobe, no personal effects, no pictures or posters, nor anything that added a personal touch. The room wasn’t even particularly large. It could have easily been used for storage, but Turing seemed content enough to stay there when she wasn’t doing anything else.

“I believe it will serve my needs for the moment.” She turned to face Twilight. “I am currently at less than 15% battery power, Twilight Sparkle. I will require a recharge or I may be forced to shut down soon.”

“I guess Spike can deliver the letter while I recharge you. You did use a lot of power today.”

“Correct. Flight and magic both consume far more energy than ordinary physical activities.”

Spike nodded and turned to leave. “Okay then. I’ll send Gadget the letter. I’m sure she’ll be happy to get it!” And with that, he left.

Twilight levitated the cables from the small generator to connect to the nodes on Turing’s back, opening the compartment to access them. “You know, I could also recharge you with my magic,” Twilight said. “Mr Vanderbull showed that to me when we were, um... putting you back together.” Silently Twilight wondered if Turing found that concept as odd as she did.

“Yes, but it is a somewhat inefficient process and would require more of your magical energy to transfer it to me than to simply crank the generator. It is, of course, your choice.”

“Fine by me,” Twilight said, and began to turn the crank. The dull whirr of the little round device and the hum of electricity was the only sound as the two of them sat like that for a few minutes.

“So,” Twilight began, trying to break the silence with some light conversation. “Um, any thoughts on today’s race?”

“Clarification required. Do you wish for me to provide further details on the race or specific data points regarding my performance?”

“I mean more like… do you have any reaction to Rainbow Dash?” she asked hesitantly. “Now that you’ve met her.”

“You informed me that she was both a superior athlete and extremely competitive. That description proved to be true.”

“Uh-huh. Anything else?”

“You also informed me that she is the representative of the element of Loyalty. Loyalty is defined as ‘a strong feeling of support or allegiance.’ However, her actions today were inconsistent with this definition. She refused your request for assistance and did not seem to respect your involvement with me.”

“Yeah, that’s true,” Twilight said, heaving a sigh. “I wish you could get to meet the Rainbow Dash I know. I don’t know why, but she’s just acting strangely.”

The two of them fell silent again as Twilight continued to recharge Turing for several more minutes.

“Battery power at 60%, Twilight Sparkle.”

Twilight nodded and was about to stop for the time being to focus on a less tedious chore when Turing spoke again.

“Twilight Sparkle, may I make a request of you?”

“Huh? Oh, sure, what do you want?”

“I would like permission to speak to Rainbow Dash on my own tomorrow.”

The sudden request surprised Twilight enough that she momentarily stopped turning the crank to stare at her. “What? Why do you want to talk to her?”

“I am uncertain of why she seems alternately interested in my abilities while also displaying hostility. I have been running calculations and analyzing various strategies to discern how to best approach her.”

“Yes, but… why do you want to talk to her?”

“It seems clear that you wish for me to bond with Rainbow Dash in the same manner that I bonded with Rarity. This is in line with my primary directive to ‘make friends.’ However, if I am correct in my analysis of her earlier reaction in which she expressed what I have identified as ‘resentment,’ then she will regard any contrivance of yours to make us bond with further hostility.”

Twilight was taken aback. “That’s very astute of you. You’re getting better at reading body language!”

“Nonverbal communication combined with her declarations allowed me to arrive at this conclusion. However, the difficulty of analyzing such data required time. I was unable to reach such a conclusion until after we returned to the castle.”

“So, what do you want to do and how can I help?”

“I will enact a plan to form a social bond with Rainbow Dash. I require only your permission to meet with her tomorrow. Do I have it?”

Twilight considered this. It seemed like a good idea, but she needed to know one more thing.

“Before I say yes, Turing… why Rainbow Dash? Lots of other ponies seem to like you more now. So why her?”

Turing was quiet for a moment. “Upon observing her, I experienced something I have not yet been able to analyze. I am not certain if it qualifies as an emotion, but it is clearly significant...”

Twilight listened as Turing Test explained what had happened. And when she understood, she knew she had to give Turing her permission.

***

The next day, Rainbow Dash was in her home doing her daily wing-ups when she heard a knock on her door. Slightly annoyed at the interruption, she ignored it, hoping whoever it was would go away. But a second, louder knock told her that perhaps she should see who it was after all.

“Thunderlane, is that you?” she called, moving through the house to the front door. “You better not be here to bother me on my day off or--” She opened the door widely.

“Greetings, Rainbow Dash,” Turing Test said. “I am not Thunderlane.”

Rainbow scowled. “Yeah. I noticed.”

The mechanical pony stood there, wings spread, her brass hooves sinking slightly into the clouds. Rainbow noticed she continually had to lift her hooves and shift her weight. This created a lot of noise as the servos and gears in her legs moved and shifted. This little “dance” made her look somewhat like a cat preparing a spot on the carpet before going to sleep.

“Uh, what are you doing?” she asked.

“Please specify.”

“I mean why are you moving around like that?”

“Understood. P-Mode enables me to fly, but it can also grant me limited cloudwalking ability by diverting some magical energy to my hooves. Titanium is an insufficient conductor of that energy, however, which is why my hooves are a partial brass alloy. It would seem that this is still an imperfect process, as I must make constant adjustments to avoid falling through the clouds.”

“So that’s why you’re moving like you’re in line for the restroom,” Rainbow said with a grin.

“I do not comprehend your meaning. My apologies, Rainbow Dash, but may we continue this interaction on the ground? This is an inefficient use of my battery power.”

Rainbow wasn’t sure she wanted to continue the interaction at all and she put her hoof to the door, ready to close it in the robot’s face. “I don’t know,” she said, eyeing her uncertainly. “You haven’t told me why you’re here yet. What did Twilight send you here for?”

“Twilight Sparkle did not send me.”

Rainbow paused, eyes widening. “What? She didn’t?”

“Repeating: Twilight Sparkle did not send me. She is aware of my presence here and I am here with her permission, but I came of my own volition. I am here to ask your assistance with another matter.”

With a tilt of her head and a long, hard look at Turing, Rainbow Dash finally shrugged and said, “All right, I can give you a few minutes.” She walked out, shutting the door behind her and fluttered to the ground. She looked up and saw that Turing Test had not joined her. “Uh, you coming?” she called up from below her cloud house.

“One moment,” Turing said. She was unseen, though still presumably standing outside Rainbow’s front door. “Disengaging P-Mode.”

“Wait, what are you--”

A moment later, Turing fell through the clouds, hurtling fifteen meters hoovesfirst at the ground. She smashed into the earth hard enough to create small impact craters with her hooves as she landed. She’d bent her knees to absorb the shock, but then straightened them out before walking over to a stunned Rainbow Dash.

“You could have broken your legs doing that!” Rainbow yelled.

“Negative. The height was not sufficient to cause damage.”

“Ugh, whatever, just tell me what you want so we can get this over with.” Rainbow was starting to think this was a waste of time. But then Turing said the last thing she expected her to say.

“Rainbow Dash, I issue you a challenge. I challenge you to a second race.”

Rainbow’s eyes went wide for a moment, but then she got a smug look on her face. “Heh. Nice try, but you already lost. Just accept it, kid; you’re not as fast as me.”

“That is correct. I estimate that with our current abilities, you would prevail upon multiple runnings of the course we flew in the majority of cases. A repeat of the race is not what I propose.”

“Wait, you want a different race?” She gave no outward sign, but internally the prospect of another race had piqued her interest.

“Affirmative,” Turing replied. “I propose a longer race. Additionally, I have plotted a suitable course for the competition.”

Rainbow frowned. “Oh, I get it… you want another race that you think I won’t win just so you can beat me and prove you’re better than me!” She poked Turing in the chest accusingly with one hoof. "I'm on to you!"

“Incorrect. My intention is to measure my abilities on a longer flight and gain further data on my ability to adapt to new situations. A competition such as the one we had yesterday seems a reliable way to test those capabilities. An uncertain outcome would be ideal: therefore I have mapped a course that gives a 50% chance of winning to either you or myself.”

“Hm.” Rainbow didn’t like to turn away from a challenge and this sounded like a fair fight. But just the same…

“So, this is going to be totally fair? How?”

“According to the data I received by scanning the Equestrian map in Twilight Sparkle’s castle, I have chosen a course that is long enough to test your endurance, but also goes through terrain with many obstacles, which will be an obstacle to my limited agility. Thus neither one of us has a distinct advantage overall.”

“All right, all right,” Rainbow said, still skeptical. She began pacing around Turing in a circle, almost as if interrogating her. “But then that just leaves the question: why should I?”

“I was under the impression you enjoyed racing.”

“I do. But I still like to race real ponies.” She got right into Turing’s face. “And I don’t think you count. It’s like a swimming race against a boat… it doesn’t exactly prove anything.”

“This reaction is unexpected. How may I entice you to participate, Rainbow Dash?” Turing asked. “Do you require some sort of compensation?”

Rainbow grinned mischievously. “Heh. Something like that. How about we make it interesting with a bet?”

“Bet.” She said the word and tilted her head. “You mean a wager. You propose some sort of exchange where the loser is indebted to the winner. That may be acceptable. What are your terms?”

“Glad to see you’re not chicken,” Rainbow laughed. “And before you ask, no, I did not mean that literally!”

“...Understood. Inquiry regarding yard fowl cancelled.”

“Right, right. Okay, if you win then… um… well, what do you want?”

“Analyzing inquiry… nothing is required.”

“Oh come on!” she exploded, launching herself into the air. “That’s just like a machine! What’s the point of a bet if there’s nothing to lose?!”

“Very well. I propose that you refrain from simply calling me ‘robot.’ While I have no emotional reaction to it, the use of the term seems to upset Twilight Sparkle. Therefore, in all subsequent interactions, you must refer to me as ‘Lady Turing.’”

Rainbow Dash nearly choked. “Have you got a screw loose?!”

“All screws are accounted for.”

“No, I mean-- gah, you know what, it’s fine! Because I’m not going to lose, so it doesn’t matter! And as for me, if - or rather, when - I kick your can all over the skies of Equestria, then you have to promise to leave me alone and never bother me again!”

Turing was silent for a moment. Her ears squeaked as they moved, but otherwise, she remained still. For a moment, Rainbow thought maybe she’d hit a nerve. But that was impossible, she knew, so maybe Turing was just thinking about it.

“While my daily interactions with Twilight Sparkle may at times intersect with yours, I believe I am able to restrict such instances to a minimum. Your proposal is satisfactory. Should you be successful, I will seek no further interaction with you, Rainbow Dash.”

“Then you’ve got yourself a race!” She put out her hoof, expecting Turing to hoof-bump her. But Turing only looked down at her outstretched foreleg and then back up at her, cocking her head to one side. Finally Rainbow put her hoof down and sighed. “So, where are we racing to?”

***

The two of them were gathered on the balcony of Twilight’s castle. Spike and Twilight were both present as the two competitors readied themselves. For Rainbow, that consisted of stretching her legs and wings and psyching herself up. For Turing Test, it consisted of standing there waiting for Rainbow Dash to finish doing those things.

“So, you’ve got it all down?” Twilight asked Rainbow Dash. She held up the unfurled map once more. “You fly from here, then through Whitetail Woods while staying below the treeline, then a long flight north following the Tolfetano River through Crumble Canyon--”

“--until I get to the fork in the river and then fly up through Frostmane Mountains and then back south to fly through Ghastly Gorge and then we end up back here, yeah, I got it!” Rainbow Dash smiled to Twilight confidently. “Relax. I’m not going to get lost.”

“Okay, okay, just making sure,” Twilight said with a smile. “It is a pretty long distance. Turing says it could take two-and-a-half to three hours.”

“Nothing I can’t handle. So, in the meantime, you’re sure you had nothing to do with this?” Rainbow asked, narrowing her eyes at her.

Twilight frowned and put her hoof to her chest. “Yes! It was all Turing’s idea. Cross my heart and hope to fly--”

“All right, fine, I believe you,” Rainbow said. “Still no idea what your robot wants to learn from this. But whatever, at least when I beat her I won’t have to worry about it anymore.”

“Wait, what do you mean?” Spike asked, taking the words right out of Twilight’s mouth.

“Turing and I made a bet,” Dash explained, her expression smug.

“That is correct,” Turing added. “Rainbow Dash and I entered into a wager. Should I be victorious, she will thereafter call me ‘Lady Turing.’”

“Ha! Oh that’s a good one!” Spike laughed.

“The intent was not to be humorous. Is that relevant?”

He shrugged. “Uhh, I guess not… wait, what if you lose?”

“If she loses,” Rainbow said, cutting in, “then she has to leave me alone from now on!”

“What?!” Twilight and Spike cried in unison.

“Correct. In the event of loss, I have agreed to no further interaction with Rainbow Dash.”

“Now hold on,” Twilight shouted, stepping between the pair, intending to end this race before it began, “I’m not going to allow--”

“Sorry, Twilight, but it’s out of your hooves,” Rainbow said, cutting her off. “After all, it’s an agreement between racers. Verbal contract or something like that. You know how it is.”

“But--”

“There is no cause for concern, Twilight Sparkle. Rainbow Dash and I have equal chances of victory. I will make my best attempt to obtain a favorable outcome.”

“Likewise,” Rainbow said. “Look, let’s just get started. We’re not getting any younger!”

“That is true: time continues to move chronologically forward. Let us begin. Will you give us the prompt to begin, Twilight Sparkle?”

“I… I guess so. I really wish you two hadn’t made this bet without letting me know, though.”

“Welp, too late, bet’s made!” Rainbow said hastily. “Let’s go already!”

“Fine,” Twilight sighed as Rainbow and Turing both lined up next to each other. Turing had her wings out and her jets had already engaged.

“On your marks… get set…" Twilight swallowed, tensing up as she uttered the last word: "Go!”

And Twilight and Spike could only watch as the two of them soared off into the blue sky and vanished over the horizon.

To be continued...

Priority Queue, Part 2

View Online

Nearly an hour had gone by and Rainbow was still in the lead. The land below was slowly changing as she flew over farms and forests which gave way to the sparsely vegetated highlands. There were even a few tiny villages and settlements out here.

The White Tail Woods had been easy for her to navigate through. Her agility allowed her to nimbly weave between the trees, while Turing had to drop her speed dramatically to avoid crashing into the trees and low-hanging branches. That had given Rainbow a tremendous lead, but she eventually heard the telltale sound of Turing’s jets as they approached Crumble Canyon.

Crumble Canyon was narrow and rock formations jutted out over the river, which itself made rapid twists and turns. Once again, Rainbow had been able to navigate it easily while Turing had fallen behind.

All right, things are going great so far, Rainbow told herself. If I don’t get too tired and I can pace myself just right, I can keep gaining some distance whenever we hit these landmarks. That robot may be, ugh, a little faster than me on the straightaways, but it looks like she isn’t maneuverable enough to make it count! And wow, what a view! I’ve never seen this part of Equestria before! And every time I hear her catching up, my heart starts going off like a jackhammer! This race is awesome! Turing did a good job on--

She paused, realizing the thought that had just formed. She shook it off. Eh, who cares? So she can plan a decent race; big deal!

The Frostmane Mountain Range would be coming into view soon, she realized. She was still climbing and the air was growing colder at the increased altitude. The sharp bite of the cold wind was a shock to her system, but it was also strangely invigorating.

That breeze, this view, the thrill of taking those hairpin turns through unknown terrain… those are things that a robot could never understand! She doesn’t get it. She’s just Twilight’s science project and this time I’ll put her back in her place once and for all!

She expected to see the mountains by now but then she saw that a large field of natural clouds was in the way. It was too wide to fly around, over, or under. It seemed she would have to navigate through it in order to get to the Frostmane Mountains without losing her lead.

No sweat! she thought. And then she heard a familiar sound. Jets.

Ha! This is perfect! She’ll have to slow down to navigate around all these clouds! And then with the mountain range, I’ll get an even bigger lead! This race is all over!

She began to weave between the thick, fluffy clouds. They blended together slightly, so she had to slow down a little to avoid them, though not as much as Turing would have to. Any minute now, she’d hear the sound of Turing’s jets behind her getting quieter.

But they weren’t getting quieter. They were getting louder. And there was another sound: a quiet, dull wump sound, something like the sound of a head hitting a pillow or a pony jumping onto a bed or…

...or a cloud being busted.

No! she exclaimed to herself as she looked over her shoulder to confirm her fear.

Sure enough, rather than avoiding the clouds, Turing’s momentum, mass, and durable exterior allowed her to simply plow directly through them. Cloud after cloud exploded into smaller puffs and wisps as she collided with them, seemingly without dropping her speed at all. In no time at all, she had caught up to Rainbow Dash and even passed her.

I can’t keep weaving like this! Rainbow thought. I’ll have to… ugh, I’ll have to follow behind her and let her cut a path through the clouds. Okay, fine, no biggie, I can still take the lead in the mountains or when we get to Ghastly Gorge!

With this strategy in mind, she settled in behind Turing Test. She didn’t want to lose too much ground, so to speak, so she increased her speed slightly more than her usual cruising speed. She even managed to catch up to Turing a little.

But this turned out to be a mistake. She closed the distance and suddenly got a blast of hot air in her face from Turing’s jets and flinched, momentarily turning her attention from the race. At that moment, Turing collided with a particularly massive cloud, blasting it into smaller chunks that she left in her wake. With Rainbow Dash blinking and wobbling slightly off course, she was too slow to react as a chunk of cloud hit her directly in the face. She yelled in surprise and frustration as she spiraled into another cloud, getting stuck in it like a snowbank and coming to a complete stop.

The sound of Turing’s jets rapidly faded away.

“NO!” Rainbow exploded, extracting herself from the thick cloud and launching herself back on course. She cleared the clouds but she saw that Turing was far ahead and had increased her speed. At this rate, even the mountains would only allow Rainbow to catch up, but once that was over there was the long straightaway to Ghastly Gorge and Turing’s superior average speed would allow her to gain so much of a lead that…

Rainbow’s heart sank. I won’t be able to catch her. Even if I use a Sonic Rainboom to speed up, I’ll use too much energy and slow down again. I can’t catch her. I’ll never catch her now. I’m… I’m gonna lose! I’m gonna lose to a machine and I'll never hear the end of it! I’ll have to call her ‘Lady Turing’ and everypony back in Ponyville, no, all across Equestria is going to know that Rainbow Dash got beat by some cold, emotionless machine! I’ve let down pegasi everywhere! I’ve-- wait, is she stopping?

Indeed, as they entered the space over Frostmane Mountains, Turing had come to a stop and was now hovering directly in Rainbow Dash’s path and waving her hooves to get her attention. And as Rainbow got closer, she heard Turing saying something:

“Rainbow Dash, please halt. There may be an emergency. It is possible that somepony urgently requires our assistance.”

Rainbow considered speeding on by Turing and taking advantage of this unexpected turn of events, but only for a split-second. As soon as she heard “somepony urgently requires our assistance,” she knew she had to stop.

“What’s the deal?” Rainbow demanded. “Who needs our help?”

“I am not certain, but I have detected something that indicates an accident has occurred nearby. Ponies' lives may be in danger.”

Rainbow looked all around. High up as they were, the tall, snow-covered peaks of the Frostmane Mountains were all she could see. She didn’t see anything suspicious from this vantage point.

“I don’t see anything,” Rainbow said, making a face. “Are you sure you’re working correctly? Maybe flying through those clouds dislodged your brain or something.”

“I am certain.” Turing Test turned and pointed with her hoof at the treeline on a mountain in the distance. “Please turn your attention to the trees approximately 2.5 kilometers to the east.”

Rainbow looked in the direction Turing indicated but saw nothing. She squinted, trying to spot some detail, but she didn’t see anything that stood out from such a long distance, at first. Then she did spot something. Her eyes may not have been as good as Turing’s, but Dash still had exceptional vision and attention to detail.

“Wait, yeah… those pine trees. Looks like there are bits of branches in the snow nearby. Kinda weird, but… eh, nothing suspicious.” She looked at Turing. “So, what’s the emergency?”

“Perhaps we should investigate more closely, Rainbow Dash,” Turing suggested. “If I am incorrect, I will offer you a 30 second lead when we resume the race.”

Rainbow shrugged. She had nothing to lose, so she agreed and she and Turing flew closer to the trees. When they got closer they could both see that the tops of many of the trees were broken and their branches had been strewn across the snow field next to them.

“Looks like something smashed into the tops of those trees,” Rainbow observed. She rubbed her chin, considering the possibilities. “Pegasi? Maybe a griffon or some other creature?”

“Unlikely. The number of trees damaged and the area of the debris field indicates a much larger object.”

“Yeah,” Rainbow said, going in for a closer look. “But what kind of object?”

“Calculations of size and mass are consistent with that of an airship.”

Rainbow’s eyes went wide. An airship, basically a boat suspended from a long, oval balloon, wasn’t terribly common in this area. Cloudsdale saw them fairly often, mainly full of tourists or transporting larger devices and supplies for the Weather Factory, but the only other place you saw them was Canterlot. The rich, elite types loved them and often took their guests aboard for fancy parties. If one of them had come through here and crashed…

“I think you’re right, Turing,” Rainbow said. “Somepony might need our help!” She began to scan the area, squinting at the bright gleam coming off the white snow that surrounded them. “But where’s the airship… wait, there!” She pointed with her hoof.

“Understood. Possible crash site located.”

They both looked around and spotted a disturbance in the snow. A long, deep gouge in the snow, carving right through a snow bank, started some distance off as if something had crashed and slid over the ground. But they saw it continued onward and only stopped once it reached the edge of a cliff.

“Oh no!” Rainbow cried. “The airship must have gone over the side!” She sped over to the edge of the cliff, Turing right behind her, and they peered over the side.

The cliff, they both saw, was actually a ravine. The deep, narrow gorge went down a few hundred meters, but halfway down, wedged between the two rocky sides of the ravine, was the airship. It was quite a bit smaller than Rainbow had been expecting, though still long enough to have a prominent deck and large enough to accommodate several ponies at once. It was purple with gold-colored trim and accents. It wasn’t as ornate as other airships she’d seen and it would have done just fine as a boat at sea, judging. Of course, at the moment it appeared worthy of neither sea nor air. It had been cracked, the wood splintered, and some of the railing had been broken clean off. The windows on the cabin near the aft of the ship were broken, their glass strewn nearby. Curiously, the balloon that should have held it up was nowhere in sight. It didn’t seem to be at the bottom of the ravine either, and there was no sign of it nearby.

“Looks like a pretty bad wreck. Um,” Rainbow Dash hesitated, looking around, “I… I don’t see any, um, ponies nearby.” She swallowed and bit her lip. She hoped to Celestia that she wouldn't see anything like that.

“Agreed. No casualties sighted. Infrared scans show no heat signatures or lifesigns. One moment.” Turing’s ears squeaked as they moved and turned on their hinges. “Rainbow Dash. An auditory scan indicates lifeforms aboard the ship.”

“You mean you can hear somepony in there?”

“Correct. Their conversation is muted. Several appear to have chattering teeth, likely a reflex to the cold.”

Rainbow Dash shivered. “Makes sense. It’s freezing up here!”

“One is groaning in pain. Another is crying. Another is reassuring the former that rescue is imminent.”

“Well, that last pony is right!” Rainbow declared, bending her knees as she prepared to leap into the ravine. “Let’s go!”

“One moment, Rainbow Dash,” Turing Test said, raising her voice to get Rainbow’s attention. “The structure of the ship has been compromised. Due to my mass, there is the possibility of collapse should I attempt to board. The possibility still exists should you board, but the risk is significantly less. I recommend you investigate alone.”

Rainbow blinked at her. “I… yeah, good thinking,” Rainbow said, spreading her wings. “I’ll be right back. Warn me if it looks like the thing’s gonna fall.”

“Understood.”

Rainbow Dash leaped over the edge and slowly descended to the deck of the ship. It wasn’t perfectly lateral and the smooth deck could be treacherous at an angle, but she gingerly touched down, trying her weight on the ship. Nothing moved, although the boards creaked slightly as she set down. Once she was certain it wouldn’t fall, she carefully walked to the door of the cabin. The door opened easily and gravity from the tilt of the ship caused it to swing out widely. Taking a deep breath, steeling herself for what she might see inside, Rainbow Dash entered.

The cabin was dark. It was decorated with a variety of pictures and a comfortable looking couch that had been bolted to the floor. Very much the property of a wealthy Canterlot pony, it seemed. The breeze that came through the broken circular windows made the room fairly chilly, so it was no surprise that it was empty. Rainbow could hear somepony downstairs, so she followed the sound and went below deck.

The sound of her hooves must have attracted attention, because she heard voices begin to chatter excitedly.

“Someone’s coming!”

“Oh thank Celestia, we’re saved!”

“There now, see? I told you all help was coming!”

Rainbow entered the spacious area below deck and saw several ponies gathered around a single lantern suspended from the ceiling. They were all wrapped up in a thick, billowing red material which she realized was the balloon that had once held up the airship. Now they were using it as a communal blanket to keep warm. It was slightly warmer, true, but even shielded from the wind, the room was still uncomfortably icy.

The last pony who had spoken extracted himself from the balloon and approached Rainbow eagerly as he stepped into the light. His white fur, long horn, and blue mane and mustache were recognizable in an instant.

“Wait a minute… I know you!” Rainbow said, her eyes popping wide open. “Mr. Fancy Pants! What are you doing here?”

“Why if it isn’t the famous Rainbow Dash, Miss Rarity’s dear friend from Ponyville!” Fancy Pants exclaimed jovially. “I am so glad to see you. And as for what we are doing here, it’s really quite the tale.

"My friends and I,” he gestured to the other ponies huddled together, peeking their heads out from the balloon’s cover, “were taking an extended voyage on my yacht from Las Pegasus to Vanhoover. We decided to do a flyover of these stunning mountains when something went wrong: our balloon began to lose air! We tried to reverse course and find a safe place to land, but we started to descend rapidly. We then tried an emergency landing in the nearby snowfield, but crashed into the tops of trees and lost our left propeller. The ship hit the ground sideways and slid into this ravine. It was only by sheer luck that the ship wedged itself between both sides of it! I’m just grateful my dear paramour Fleur de Lis avoided this disaster. She chose to meet us in Vanhoover rather than travel by airship, you see.”

“It is all my fault, sir!” came an older pony’s voice. “I should have checked the rigging and the balloon more thoroughly!”

“Nonsense, this was a freak accident and you can’t blame yourself, Anchors Aweigh,” Fancy Pants assured him. “Besides, it was your piloting skills that prevented us from crashing into the side of the mountain on the way down.”

“Okay, okay, we can figure out the cause of the crash later,” Rainbow said impatiently, holding up her hoof. “Is anypony injured?”

“Unfortunately, yes. Jet Set’s broken his foreleg, Sea Swirl has dislocated her shoulder, and Golden Gavel might have broken both of his hind legs when a table fell on him. Nearly everypony else suffered some cuts, sprains, and bruises in the crash, myself included.” He lifted his hair and displayed a makeshift bandage on his head. “We had our first aid kit, of course, but we need medical attentio--oh, oh my!” He stumbled and nearly fell forward as he took a step toward Rainbow Dash.

“Hey, easy, easy,” she said, catching him. “That looks like more than a bump. You might have a concussion.”

“Ah. I see. I suppose we should just be thankful that nopony was, er, ‘lost’ in this disaster.”

Rainbow tried to think rapidly. This situation was bad. The ship was still creaking and it wasn’t at all certain that it would hold. And all these injured ponies…

“Tell me, Rainbow Dash,” Fancy Pants said, leaning down to her, “are the other rescue ponies nearby? You should probably notify them.”

Rainbow Dash looked away. “Yyyeah, thing is, I’m not part of a rescue team. I was flying over these mountains as part of a race. You just got lucky we spotted the crash site.”

“Ah,” he said, trying hard to hide his dashed hopes. “Well, do you suppose you might still be able to aid us?”

“Yes. Don’t worry everypony, I won’t let you down! Stay right here, I’ll try to see how we can help!”

***

When Dash came back to the top of the ravine, Turing Test was nowhere to be seen. A moment later, however, she heard Turing’s jets and she landed nearby.

“Where did you go?!” Rainbow demanded. “I thought you were going to watch the ship!”

“Apologies. I was monitoring you auditorily. The ship appeared to be sturdy, so I decided to prepare for the extrication of the casualties. I have located a cave 200 meters to the northeast where we may shelter them from the elements and build a fire. I believe that should be our top priority.”

“Oh. Okay, yeah, that makes sense.” She looked down at the ship. “Looks like about a dozen ponies are in there. Can you help me fly them out?”

“Negative.”

“Wait, what?! Why not?” Rainbow demanded, stomping her hoof.

“Clarifying: It is not that I am unwilling. I am in fact capable of hefting the weight of a full-sized adult pony with ease and the propulsion of my jets is sufficient to provide such lift. However, the heated air from those jets would cause grave injury to anypony I attempted to lift. Therefore, I am unable to assist in that manner.”

“Just great,” Rainbow Dash sighed, massaging her temple. “Okay, I think I can carry them to that cave. You gather some wood and make a fire. Can you do that?”

“The principle of creating fire through friction is in my database. I will be able to complete that task.”

“Good. Meet me at the cave as soon as you can.”

***

“Oh good heavens, this cave is simply dreadful!” Upper Crust moaned. “And where is that partner of yours, young lady? I thought you said she was gathering firewood!”

Rainbow Dash grit her teeth and looked back at her over her shoulder from the entrance of the cave. “Just keep your cardigan on, lady, I’m sure she’ll be here soon!” she growled.

“Well!” Upper Crust cried indignantly, but then turned as Jet Set began groaning again. “Oh, shh shh, it’s all right, dear, help is coming! We’ll have that fire and be nice and toasty any minute now!”

Rainbow felt a little guilty yelling at her, but she wasn’t making things easier by getting impatient. The others were gathered in the cave as well and Rainbow was still breathing hard after carrying them all, one by one, from the ship, over the hill, and to the cave that Turing Test had found. Just her luck that not one among them was a pegasus! Still, her robot companion was nowhere to be seen. Once she caught her breath, she considered going out to look for her.

Just then, however, she heard the sound of snow crunching underhoof and a gallop that was slowing as it reached the cave. Rainbow Dash looked out and spotted Turing Test coming up over the hill, sending snow flying in her wake.

“I apologize for my delay, Rainbow Dash,” Turing said as she arrived, now using magic to levitate a pile of wood and sticks. “Finding a sufficient quantity of dry wood suitable for combustion proved more time-consuming than originally estimated.”

“That’s fine, let’s just--”

“Eeek! What is that!” one of the casualties screamed. The others likewise sat up or cowered in fear at the sight of Turing’s silhouetted figure and glowing purple eyes in the darkness of the cave. They weren’t any less afraid once she came closer and they saw her strange, mechanical appearance.

“Ugh, that’s just Turing Test, the ro-- the pony I was racing against.” Rainbow Dash hesitated, but then added, “And she’s the one who actually spotted the crash site.”

“She?” Sea Swirl asked. “Is there a pony inside that armor?”

Rainbow Dash opened her mouth, intending to go with that explanation, but was just a moment too slow.

“Incorrect. I am a mechanical construct, a machine, built to resemble organic ponies.”

“Good heavens, how garish!” Upper Crust cried.

“What’s wrong with its voice?!” another shouted.

“Hey!” Rainbow yelled, getting their attention. “Don’t talk about her that way!” She paused as all eyes, including Turing’s, were on her. “I… I mean, she’s trying to help! Even if she’s a robot you could, you know, show a little gratitude.”

Fancy Pants smiled and stepped forward uneasily. “Yes, you're quite right,” he said. “Where are our manners? My name is Fancy Pants. Thank you, Miss… Touring Test was it?”

“Correction: it is pronounced ‘Turing Test.’ Your gratitude is acknowledged.” She set the sticks on the ground and placed them in a small structure to begin building a fire. She held some smaller tinder and sticks near one of the larger pieces and placed a stick atop it, holding it upright with her hooves.

“Are you sure you wouldn’t like some help with that? I was a Colt Scout in my youth and building a fire this way takes quite a bit of elbow grease!”

Turing rapidly moved the stick with her hooves, fast enough to make them a blur, and the kindling quickly began to smoke from the friction and then burst into flames.

“My elbows are sufficiently lubricated.”

“Pfft, hahaha!” Rainbow laughed, surprising even herself. She clapped her hooves over her mouth, looking sheepish.

Fancy Pants also smiled. “Well, it seems our fire is ready,” he said. “Gather around, everypony, we must keep warm!”

“Correct. A decrease in body temperature would exacerbate your injuries.” She turned to Rainbow. “Rainbow Dash, I require your attention. Will you please speak with me outside so as not to cause emotional distress to the crash victims when I inform you of the severity of their situation.”

“Wait, what?” Golden Gavel asked.

“Haha, that Turing, such a kidder!” Rainbow said, urging Turing to go outside before she said anything else. Once outside, she glared at her. “Nice job, Turing! Way to put your hoof in your mouth!”

“I do not have a mouth.”

“That’s-- freaky, but never mind that. What did you want to talk about?”

“We have stabilized the victims and built a fire. However, the scarcity of suitable firewood means that this is a temporary situation. I estimate that it will not last through the night. Furthermore, nightfall will occur in less than two hours, at which point the temperature will likely drop to dangerously frigid temperatures. The possibility of hypothermia is extremely likely. Should that occur, their lives may be in danger.”

“Yeah… oh wow.” Rainbow looked all around them. The wind had died down temporarily and she looked out across the mountain range that dwarfed them and took up the horizon in every direction. Only now did she truly realize just how isolated they were. She lowered her head and whispered “This is serious, isn’t it?”

“Correct. Furthermore, my scans of the area indicate a high probability of an avalanche. Additionally, wild nocturnal predators will likely be attracted to the smell of blood from the injured. All of this makes it unwise to remain here for long. It is imperative that we extricate the victims from this environment and get them medical attention.”

“So we go and get help!”

“That is the most logical solution. However, that presents another problem. To successfully remove the victims in a timely manner, we require a rescue team capable of flight. Pegasi would be ideal. A large settlement with a sizable hospital would be the best place to seek such assistance.”

“Okay, let me think… Cloudsdale’s on the other side of Equestria right now. So that leaves, um, Tall Tale to the west, and Vanhoover to the northwest.”

“Accessing my data regarding those locations… I estimate that you would need over an hour to reach Tall Tale. However, your speed is above average for a pegasus. The pegasi you recruit will likely require over 90 minutes to arrive back at this location. Night will fall by that time, making rescue unsafe.”

“Then… then maybe you should go,” Rainbow said. “You’re… fine, I’ll say it: you’re faster than me.”

“That is not an option either. After my aerial survey of the area and the use of magic to obtain firewood, my battery power is currently at 35%. While I could reach Tall Tale more quickly, I would be dangerously low on energy upon arrival. I would require 30 extra minutes of direct charging from a unicorn’s magic to be able to direct the rescue team back and, again, they would not be able to match my speed. Night would fall, risking the victims and making rescue unsafe.”

“Oh for pony’s sake!” Rainbow shouted. “Well, maybe we can just take them down the mountain one at a time!”

“You showed fatigue after lifting them and transporting them a distance of 200 meters. Can you truly transport them the several kilometers to safety?”

Rainbow sighed. “Okay, yeah, that’s not gonna work. Maybe one or two, I could… I know you couldn’t fly anypony, but could you carry them on your back while you ran them down?”

“Without a means of stabilizing them, that would be inadvisable. And the repeated trips would likely deplete my battery power before completion of the task. Even then, night would fall before that time."

Rainbow scrunched her eyes shut, trying to think. “What about getting help from somewhere closer?”

“We did pass a small community nearby these mountains, but it was a farming community with a smaller medical center. It is unlikely they will have a team of aerial rescue pegasi and it would be exceptionally dangerous for earth ponies to venture into the mountains at night. They would not be able to provide rescue until the next day.”

Rainbow hung her head. This situation was looking worse and worse. There was no way to get a rescue team there before nightfall. And Turing was right, it would be dangerous for pegasi to fly anypony around in the dark, let alone risking earth ponies. Avalanches, freezing temperatures, wild animals, a robot with a nearly dead battery…

“No ideal options available. My programming does not allow me to let a pony come to harm. You must flee the area and bring help tomorrow morning. I will stay with the victims.”

“What?!” Rainbow Dash cried, her body stiffening with shock. “Why should I leave?”

“Risking your life is unacceptable. I will stay vigilant and protect the victims from animal attacks. It is possible that I will be able to maintain a fire and Fancy Pants or another unicorn can keep me charged through the night.”

“But they could still freeze to death!”

“Yes. But there is no better option.”

“That’s not good enough!” Rainbow shouted, sweeping her foreleg at the cave. “I’m not leaving you all here! What if there’s an avalanche?!”

“You are no more likely to survive that situation. In my case, after an avalanche, you could at least exhume me when the weather turns warm.”

Rainbow Dash blinked, then narrowed her eyes. “No.”

“Your cooperation is ideal, Rainbow Dash.”

“Too bad. It’s not happening! I’m not leaving you or any of them behind! We’re going to get them all off this mountain together or else neither of us is going back!”

Turing Test cocked her head to the side. “This behavior is illogical, but more consistent with the way Twilight Sparkle described you, Rainbow Dash.”

She raised an eyebrow. “Oh yeah?”

“Yes. She described you as stubborn.”

Rainbow chuckled. “That’s me all right. Look, I’m not leaving and neither are you. So instead of worrying about that, let’s figure out another solution.”

“As stated, no other solutions--”

“Come on!" She rolled her eyes. "What happened to all the guts and strategies you were showing off in the race yesterday?”

Turing paused. “You refer to my innovation and adaptability?”

“Yeah, that. Can’t you think of something new? You did it before! I mean, seriously, ringing the bell by crashing into it?! That was awe…” she hesitated, but then finished. “It was awesome, okay? You’re a heck of a racer: you’re tough and you’re smart. Now do something good with it!”

Turing was silent, but as Rainbow had learned, that didn’t mean anything other than that she wasn’t ready to respond. She was probably thinking. The telltale sound of her ears twitching and the slight blip in her eyes was a sure indication that she was.

Suddenly, her eyes shrank to pinpricks and a higher electrical whine came from her before they returned to normal size and the sound ceased.

“Alternate solution reached. Rainbow Dash, we may be able to save everypony, but you must do precisely as I say.”

At last, Rainbow gave a toothy grin. “Where do we start?”

***

They peered down at the airship as they once again stood on the edge of the ravine. Rainbow Dash had already taken to the air and was considering the best approach.

Turing looked up at her from the edge of the ravine. “Please exercise caution, Rainbow Dash.”

“Yeah, yeah, no problem,” she said, nonchalantly waving a hoof. “Just save your battery power and let me do this.”

Rainbow took off higher into the air and then shot downward as fast as she could. She turned her body around in midair, aiming her back hoof directly at the large crack in the hull of the ship. Hitting it with as much force as she could muster, she sprang off it and took off again to get clear.

At first it seemed to have no effect, but the telltale sound of wood cracking and giving way was heard and the ship began to buckle and splinter. Finally, under its own weight, the compromised ship collapsed with a thunderous sound and split in two, falling into the ravine and smashing into pieces.

“Ha! Rainbow Smash!” she yelled triumphantly.

“First stage is complete. Please proceed to tie the ropes.”

They’d already removed the ropes from the balloon and piled them up near Turing Test. While Turing could use magic to tie them herself, doing so would consume more power, and they’d already determined she would need as much as possible for this plan to work.

Rainbow began tying the ropes together, one after another, using her hooves and teeth the best she could. Once the knots were satisfactory, she tied one end around Turing’s midsection. She then took the other end and, holding it in her teeth, took it to the bottom of the ravine, tying it around the anchoring holes at the tip of the remnants of the ship’s bow. Once she was sure it was secure, she flew up again and called out, “All set!”

“Understood. Engaging E-Mode.”

With her enhanced strength, Turing began to pull, digging her hooves through the snow and planting them firmly into the ground with each step. Lowering her body, she steadily began to plod forward, pulling the broken - but still sizable - bow back up and out of the ravine. In short order, she managed to pull the large chunk of the ship over the edge, where it slid over the snow before coming to rest.

“Returning to neutral mode. Power at 27%.”

“Oh boy, is that going to be enough?”

“It should be sufficient. However, you will need to further demolish the bow for our purposes without my aid. Please begin. I will monitor your progress.”

Rainbow nodded. “Sure thing, I--ow!” She grunted, flexing her wings.

Turing Test raised her head and went over to her. “Are you all right, Rainbow Dash? Have you sustained an injury?”

“No,” she said, setting down in the snow, shivering and hugging herself. “It’s getting colder. My wings are tired and they’re starting to ache in all this cold.”

Turing Test walked over to Rainbow Dash's side and, without warning, turned and draped her tail over her.

“H-hey what are you doing?!” Rainbow demanded.

“My mane and tail function as heat sinks. They carry heat away from my internal mechanisms and thus their temperature is fairly high. Currently, they are at 42 degrees centigrade, slightly above that of normal pony body temperature. Warm yourself for a few minutes before continuing your task.”

Rainbow still felt a little silly about it, but the material of Turing’s tail was surprisingly soft and smooth to the touch and the coils did indeed feel quite warm draped over her back.

“Thanks,” she muttered.

The two of them sat in silence for a full minute before Rainbow decided to say more.

“Hey, Turing, do you mind if I ask you something?”

“I do not believe it is possible for me to be offended by an inquiry.”

“That must be nice,” she said. “So, this race we’re having? Well, had. It’s pretty clear the race is over now, isn’t it?”

“Affirmative. Was that your inquiry?”

“No, it wasn’t. What I wanted to know was, well, how come you wanted to race anyway? You could have flown this course without me if you really wanted to measure your abilities. So what’s the deal?”

“That was a valid reason.”

Rainbow thought for a moment. “Was it the only reason?” she asked, slyly raising an eyebrow.

Turing hesitated for a moment. “It was not,” she replied. “I determined from reading several works of fiction in Twilight Sparkle’s library that athletes who compete often gain mutual respect and admiration for each other upon defeating one another, a state which often leads to friendship. As making friends is the goal of my primary directive, it seemed that I would be able to make friends with you by earning your respect.”

Rainbow was silent. She felt conflicted. It was almost a sweet gesture, but the logic that she would make friends with Turing just because of winning or losing a race seemed way too simple. It was almost insulting to think such an idea would work on her.

“In full disclosure, there was an additional motive.”

Surprised at this, Rainbow asked, “Another reason, you mean? What was it?”

***

The day before…

Twilight and Turing were still discussing the results of the first race and Turing’s request to visit Rainbow Dash.

“Before I say yes, Turing… why Rainbow Dash? Lots of other ponies seem to like you more now. So why her?”

Turing was quiet for a moment. “I experienced something I have not yet been able to analyze upon observing her. I am not certain if it qualifies as an emotion, but it is clearly significant...”

Twilight leaned forward and listened intently as Turing Test explained what had happened.

“Pegasi are capable of considerable speed in flight. However, my analysis of the data in your books indicated that supersonic speed is an exceptionally rare ability. And there was no data available to indicate that the creation of luminescence was a possibility. Upon seeing Rainbow Dash perform her Sonic Rainboom, I attempted to process how such a thing was possible. I concluded that it was the result of both exceptional natural ability and also exceptional effort on her part. Rainbow Dash has overcome her normal physical limits to become something totally unique. I believe I was… impressed. It may be accurate to identify it as an emotional response categorized as ‘amazement.’”

***

“Y-you were amazed by me?!” Rainbow asked breathlessly. Not normally modest, she actually found herself blushing at such a flattering statement. She was the one to cause a machine to feel amazement for the very first time!

That is sooo awesome! she thought to herself, a big grin coming across her face.

“That is correct. As a machine, I am bound by certain physical limits. Without modifications to my physical structure, I am incapable of overcoming those limits. In contrast, Rainbow Dash, you are an organic pony who has transcended your normal limitations. This made me consider the possibility of how much further I could go beyond my own programming. I had not considered the idea of such a thing before. In our initial race, I was compelled to improvise in ways I was never programmed for. And again, at present, your urging has caused me to invent a new strategy using creativity I previously thought I lacked. It would be accurate to state that you ‘inspire’ me.”

Rainbow was quiet. Turing detected her drawing in a breath sharply and making some sort of high-pitched noise and sniffling.

“Are you all right, Rainbow Dash?”

“Yep!” she said. “Yep, fine! Not getting misty-eyed, if that’s what you’re thinking!”

“...Understood.”

Quiet again settled over the two of them as Turing continued to warm Rainbow Dash.

“Perhaps I could make an inquiry in return?” Turing asked.

“Eh, fair’s fair,” she said. “Go ahead.”

“Your speed is considerable, but it would be possible to increase your overall speed by trimming your mane and tail to minimum length to decrease wind resistance.”

“What, shave off my mane and tail?! Are you crazy? No, don’t answer that, it’s an expression!”

“Understood. And that is what I was indicating.”

“No way! Sure, I could go a little faster, but I’d look stupid while doing it! What’s the point of being the fastest pony in Equestria if I look like a dope?! I need my mane and tail to leave behind that flash of rainbow when I fly. Gotta have both if I wanna look cool.”

“To clarify: you desire both velocity and positive aesthetic value.”

“If that’s Robotese for ‘cool,’ then yeah.”

“Understood.” Her ears twitched. "'Cool.' Interesting."

“Okay, as long as we’re being chatty and all, I’ve got another question.”

“Please make your inquiry.”

“So, the whole idea of this race was to beat me and get me to make friends with you, right?”

“Affirmative.”

“For one, that wouldn’t work, and I’m not going to bother telling you why. But here’s what I don’t get: if that’s what you wanted so bad, why’d you stop the race when you were winning? You didn’t know for sure anypony was in trouble and gave up your lead!”

“That is correct. While it was a possibility, I did not have confirmation that such a disaster had actually occurred.”

An icy breeze blew over the snowfield and Rainbow momentarily shivered, pulling the coils of Turing’s tail around her further. “Okay, so why?”

“Twilight Sparkle instructed me to obey what she referred to as the ‘Three Laws of Automata.’ Among those laws was the instruction that I not harm any ponies, nor should I allow ponies to come to harm through inaction.”

“Hmph,” Rainbow sniffed, disappointed. She lowered her head. “You were just following orders.”

“That summation is inaccurate.”

“But you just said--”

“I will clarify. Due to the nature of the situation, namely that I was uncertain that any ponies were actually in danger, the law did not technically apply. Rather, it has been indicated by Twilight Sparkle that the lives of other ponies are to be valued and protected. Very recently, Twilight Sparkle was presented with a large monetary offer in exchange for my ownership. She refused to consider that option and strongly indicated that, to her, I had value that could not be measured monetarily. While I do not fully comprehend her reasons, I consider her trust and esteem to be valuable and desirable and wish to please her as my end user and friend. If I, a mere machine, have such value, then logically the value of an organic pony must be far greater.”

“Heh. Even those snooty ponies back the cave?”

“Their reactions to me are fearful, based on unfamiliarity and ignorance. Such reactions are not without precedent. Many ponies display such reactions upon seeing me. Others, such as yourself, even display unconcealed hostility.”

Rainbow cringed at that. “Oh. Yeah.”

“Such reactions are irrelevant. I believe that my superior strength and abilities should be used to safeguard organic ponies, including the citizens of Ponyville, Fancy Pants, his associates, and you. I believe I must place such protection over my own goals and needs, even if it means that you and I will not become friends. That is why I chose to move the search for the injured to the top of my priority queue. One might call it displaying my gratitude to Twilight Sparkle. One might also call it ‘duty.’ Or perhaps a more accurate term would be--”

“--Loyalty.” Rainbow said the word quietly.

“Affirmative. I believe I must be loyal to Twilight Sparkle and, in a larger sense, to all ponies, when possible.”

Rainbow smiled. “That’s… I kinda like that.” Then she threw off Turing’s tail and faced her. “But that still doesn’t mean you have to put up with those snobs when they talk to you like that! Or even me! You said it yourself: Twilight thinks you’re valuable! I don’t know anything about who’s more valuable or whatever, but next time someone treats you like that, you know what you oughta do?”

Turing Test cocked her head. “I do not.”

“You look ‘em in the eye and tell ‘em, ‘Bite my shiny metal flank!’ That’s what you do!”

“Illogical. My robodonkadonk is tasteless and inedible.”

Rainbow’s eyes went wide. “What.”

“Also, in this weather, the possibility of an organic pony’s lips freezing to my posterior is--”

“BWAHAHAHAHA oh my gosh, oh my gosh, stop!” she laughed, holding her sides. “I did not need that image in my head! Hahaha, just tell ‘em, okay?”

“Understood. However, you seem to be sufficiently warmed, Rainbow Dash. Are you ready to continue demolishing the airship’s bow?”

“Huh? Oh, right!” She flew up and pointed her hoof at the ship. “All right, ship! I’m about to do to you what I did to Applejack’s barn!”

***

Fancy Pants and the others were gathering around the slowly dying fire when they heard a sound coming from outside.

“Just a moment, everypony,” Fancy Pants said. “Anchors Aweigh, if you’ll investigate with me?”

“Aye, sir,” he said.

The two stallions walked outside to see a curious sight coming up over the hill. Rainbow was flying overhead. But across the snow, Turing was pulling what looked to be the very front part of Fancy Pants' airship. It was now nothing more than the very tip of the vessel, with the flat part of the deck and some of the railing preserved, as well as the curved underside. Turing was tied to it with ropes which formed a harness.

“Oh my word!” Fancy Pants said as they slid to a stop next to the cave. “I see! You’ve constructed a sort of makeshift sled out of my airship!”

“Uh, yeah, sorry about smashing it up,” Rainbow said.

“Sorry? I’d trade a hundred airships for this sled right now!”

“For once, so would I,” Anchors Aweigh agreed, a bright smile coming to his gray, weathered face.

“There is no time to waste, Fancy Pants,” Turing Test said. “Rainbow Dash will assist you and your associates in boarding. Upon completion, I will pull you all to the bottom of this mountain. Rainbow Dash will fly to the nearest settlement and bring a medical team to rescue you.”

“Yeah, this thing’s a little bigger than we wanted, but it’s the best we could do,” Rainbow said. “It’s still pretty sturdy and it’ll get you all down. But we’ve got to go quick, it’s getting colder and colder out!”

They all looked and saw that the sun was rapidly descending over the mountains, the sky turning a shade of deep purple that was reflected in the snow all around them. The temperature would plunge in no time.

“Well then, no time to lose!” Fancy Pants said, turning back into the cave. “Come on, everypony! Our saviors have arrived! Gather up the injured and help them to board!”

Rainbow turned her attention to Turing Test. “Are you sure you’ll be okay on your own?”

“I am not certain. However, the most expedient way to rescue the victims is for us to travel separately. Please go and notify the nearby medical staff. Have them bring several carts to transport the injured.”

“Right.” She was about to go when she added, “Good luck, Turing.”

“Acknowledged.”

Rainbow Dash took off, rapidly vanishing over the snowy peaks as she made her way to the nearest community. Fancy Pants, Anchors Aweigh, and even Upper Crust helped the injured into the crude sled. Fancy Pants used an extra rope to provide some backing for the open sled to prevent anypony from tumbling out if they hit a bump or something on the slopes down.

“Are you prepared to depart?” Turing Test asked.

“I believe so, yes,” Fancy Pants said.

“Fancy, are you certain we should trust this… mechanism with our lives?” asked a mare wearing spectacles.

“Silver Frames, if you wish to remain in the cave for the evening, then by all means,” he said, sighing exasperatedly.

Silver Frames tightened her lips. “Well... when you say it like that…”

“We must depart. Please brace yourselves as the inertia will be considerable.”

“The inertia? What do you mea-augh!” she cried as Turing began pulling the sled, jerking it forward and causing them all to fall back. “Ah. I see.”

***

The frigid breeze chilled Turing’s passengers to the bone, though luckily they’d still brought a swatch of the balloon with them to act as a blanket. This didn’t bother Turing, of course, as she swiftly pulled the sled down the slope. They passed pine trees caked with snow as they weaved through paths and around rocky formations to take the smoothest possible route. As night fell, the stars began to appear and the moon slowly crept over the peaks in the east, casting its pale glow over them all. The swift, hushed sound of the sled as it plowed through the snow, along with the punctuated thump of Turing’s hooves rhythmically galloping almost made this rescue seem tranquil.

“Such beauty,” Fancy Pants whispered, his breath coming out in wisps of steam. He smiled serenely, looking over the icy, moonlit mountainside. “And so peaceful. It is as if the whole world is whispering.” Then he frowned. He heard something else. He also noticed that Turing had picked up speed. “Um, Miss Turing? Do you hear that as well?”

“Affirmative.”

“Well… does it have something to do with why you’re going faster?”

“Affirmative.”

Fancy Pants started to get nervous. He heard a faint rumbling and it was getting louder. He looked at the top of a nearby peak to the left of them and the trees along it seemed to be… bowing? No, falling. Something was coming down the mountains and knocking the trees down as it went.

“Good heavens!” Upper Crust cried, pointing at the phenomenon as well. “What is that?!”

“Avalanche detected.”

The passengers all began to panic and shout as the cascade of snow became a roar and it tore through the nearby trees at it came down at them.

“Altering route and increasing velocity. E-Mode activated.”

With another jolt, the sled picked up speed and veered off to the right, away from the approaching avalanche. Turing knew that they would have to avoid it by going up the opposite peak and through a narrow pass, but that had not been part of her original calculations. Now that she had activated E-Mode to boost her pulling power, she was using more energy than she’d planned.

“Oh my! Oh my, it’s coming closer!”

“We’ll all be killed!”

“Faster, you machine! Hurry hurry hurry!”

Turing heard them, but did not acknowledge them. She instead ascended the nearby slope as the snow behind them crashed and thundered, churning into an icy, powdery river behind them. They narrowly escaped, but her sensors indicated that the seismic vibrations would cause more minor avalanches. In fact, the very peak they were on…

“The snow! Miss Turing, it’s beginning to slide off the mountain!” Fancy Pants cried.

“Acknowledged. Attempting to evade.”

She made it over one side of the mountain and began to descend again. The pass was just ahead of them and she sped into it, the sled roughly jumping and rattling as they hit the choppier terrain and their momentum caused them to roughly bounce off the rocky walls. They looked up through the narrow crack at the top of the pass as waves of snow began to fly overhead, dusting them with it as it seeped into the pass.

A rumble and low, rocky crashing was heard as chunks of stones, larger boulders, and other debris began to rain all around them. They screamed in terror as one deadly missile after another narrowly missed them. Some even pelted the rails and sides of the former ship, splintering the wood around them. And then Fancy Pants saw a rock the size of a bowling ball tumble directly at Turing Test.

“Miss Turing--!” he cried out.

Turing didn’t even slow down as the boulder came right at her. She simply raised one hoof at precisely the right moment, striking it and shattering it to rubble that clattered against the front of the sled.

“No damage sustained.”

“Ah… bravo.” Fancy Pants laughed in spite of himself.

They burst from the pass and saw that the avalanche was a churning cataclysmic mess behind them. But ahead of them, the snow was smooth and clear as they continued down the slope. They gave a cheer as they realized they had made it.

“You’ve done it, Turing!” Fancy Pants yelled. “You’ve saved us!”

“That outcome has not been determined conclusively.”

“What? What’s wrong?”

“There is one kilometer left until we are safely out of range. However, my power is currently at 3%. Even with returning to neutral mode, I am not certain I will be able to transport you to that distance.”

“What? Could I not, uh, charge you? I thought I heard you say unicorn magic--”

“Switching to U-Mode is necessary for that method. That would mean terminating E-Mode and lowering our velocity. Furthermore, pulling the sled consumes energy faster than you would be able to replenish it. No advantage would be gained.”

Fancy Pants was quiet. Then he straightened his back, letting out a sigh of calm resignation. “Very well. Then good luck, and whatever happens, thank you for your effort, Miss Turing.”

Turing Test did not respond, but continued pulling them. Her power was beginning to drain and her systems were warning her to shut down to conserve power, but she persevered.

Soon the snow gave way to rocks and the ride became bumpier. The slope became less steep and they could at last see that the trees were parting to view the flat highland plains below. The frigid air had now become warmer. Still cool, but not enough to be dangerous to their health.

The sled slowly came to a stop and everypony sighed with relief. Fancy Pants looked over the railing and saw that Turing had sat down on the rocks just ahead of the sled. The ropes of her harness were slack.

“Well done, Miss Turing,” Fancy Pants said, smiling at the robot.

She did not respond.

“Miss Turing?” Again, there was no response.

Fancy Pants carefully stepped over the side of the sled and trotted over to her, investigating the situation. He gasped when he saw her.

There before him, Turing Test had settled into a sitting position, her head lowered slightly. Her eyes had gone completely dark and she was as still as a statue.

“Oh. Oh, poor, dear Miss Turing.” She’d used every last bit of her power to carry them as far as she possibly could.

***

System online. Recovery from automatic shutdown engaged. Loading memory… complete. Activating visual and auditory sensors… complete.

“Hello? Turing? You in there?”

Speaker identified: Rainbow Dash.

Turing Test’s eyes came on and the cameras in them began to focus. She turned to see Rainbow Dash standing next to her. She rose into a standing position herself.

“Greetings, Rainbow Dash,” she said. She looked around and saw they were in some simple room made out of wood. “This location is unfamiliar. Please identify.”

“We’re in the hospital in that village we saw earlier. Just some little place called Exmoor. Lucky you, they had a portable generator they use in case the power goes out, so we re-charged you. And finding your start button was a real pain. Whoever built you sure didn’t make it obvious!”

“Understood. Thank you for turning me on.”

Rainbow Dash made a face. “Please don’t say it like that.”

“The time was approximately 7 PM when I powered down. What is the time now?”

“About eleven o’clock,” she replied. “You were out for four hours.”

“Understood. What is the status of the crash victims?”

Rainbow smiled. “Come see for yourself.”

She took her over to the door and opened it, beckoning Turing Test with one hoof. Once they stepped through, Turing saw that the small ward was lined with hospital beds and each one was taken up by the victims from the crash. They were all resting or in bandages or being tended to by nurses and doctors.

“They’re all right,” Rainbow said, almost laughing in disbelief. “They lived. Every one of them. We did it, Turing.”

Turing scanned the room before turning back to Rainbow. “Understood. Rescue mission was successful. It appears that you were able to enlist a sufficient rescue team.”

“Ehhh, almost. We needed to go back and get another cart just for you!” She laughed, putting her hoof on Turing's shoulder. “Yeesh, Turing, you weigh more than Pinkie Pie after a bake-off!”

Turing didn’t respond, but began to walk away.

“Huh? Where are you going?” Rainbow asked.

“I must notify Twilight Sparkle of our location. Perhaps there is a telegraph office.”

“There is, and I already did it while they were re-charging you. Twi’s probably worried sick, but at least now she knows we’re both fine.”

“Acknowledged. Thank you, Rainbow Dash.”

“Speaking of thanks,” Rainbow said loudly, looking over at some of the nearby rescued victims in their hospital beds. “I believe some are in order, hmmm?” She looked at Upper Crust pointedly.

“Ah, yes, of course,” Upper Crust said, sitting up in her hospital bed. “Thank you, Rainbow Dash.”

Rainbow Dash waited for her to say more. When Upper Crust just stared back at her, she frowned. “Uh, forgetting somepony?” She jerked her head over at Turing Test.

“What, the machine?” Upper Crust laughed, waving her hoof dismissively. “Next you’ll be expecting me to thank the sled or the carts that brought us here!”

“I know, and did you see how her eyes went dark when her battery went dead?” Silver Frames hissed from the bed next to hers. “How ghastly!”

Rainbow was trembling and her teeth were grit and she was about to explode in anger, but then Turing quietly took a step forward.

“Upper Crust and Silver Frames,” she began, causing the two mares to freeze, “I have a request for you:

“Bite my shiny metal flank.”

“What?!” they both cried in unison as Rainbow Dash fell to the floor laughing.

Just then, Fancy Pants entered the room. “Ah, Miss Rainbow Dash, Miss Turing Test! I'm so glad I caught you! A word, please?”

The two followed him outside and down the stairs to the hospital’s front door.

“I wanted to express my gratitude, even if my colleagues are, well…”

“Rude, stuck-up snobs?” Rainbow Dash asked flatly.

“Ha! Well, yes, quite.” He tugged at his collar nervously, but cleared his throat. “But you are deserving of thanks. They and I owe both of you our lives. Should either of you need a favor, please notify me in Canterlot and I will help however I can.”

Rainbow smiled. “No problem, Fancy!”

“Your gratitude is acknowledged.”

He smiled and turned away, intending to send his own message to Fleur de Lis in Vanhoover.

“My power is still insufficient to risk a flight home,” Turing Test said. “Perhaps we should see if a late train is available to return to Ponyville.”

“Sounds good. My wings are killing me!”

“Upon our return, I will honor my end of our wager and cease further contact with you.” She began to trot toward the door. Rainbow’s eyes shot open and she soared over her to land in her path, blocking the door.

“Whoa whoa whoa!” she exclaimed, holding out a hoof to halt her. “What are you talking about?!”

“Our race never came to a conclusion, but you have discovered the reasons for me requesting it. As you indicated, winning the race to gain your friendship would not have worked. Furthermore, I have gained a sufficient quantity of data. There is therefore no need to have another race. In the interest of fairness, I will grant you the prize of your wager to mollify you. I will leave you alone.”

“N-now hold on,” Rainbow said, her cheeks reddening. “I mean, that only applies if I win the race. Well, ya know… since we never finished, that’s not necessary. Besides, I mean… after all this? After all we did today, you want to never talk to each other again?”

Turing cocked her head to the side. “Negative. However, it was my understanding that you desired such an outcome.”

“Hooboy, you really don’t know much about ponies, do you?” She smiled. “So let me teach you something. Here, stick out your hoof.”

Turing raised her foreleg slightly. Rainbow Dash adjusted it so it was sticking straight out.

“There. Perfect.” And with that, she hoof-bumped her, the sound of bone hitting metal emitting a dull clank as she did.

Turing stood there with her hoof still extended. Presently, she understood that she could put it down. “What was the meaning of that gesture?” she asked finally.

“It’s just a little something that means ‘You did great,’ or ‘You’re awesome.’” She turned to go, not wanting Turing to see the grin she had on her face. “It’s just a little something we organic ponies like to do… with our friends.”

Turing Test was quiet as Rainbow walked out the hospital door. She raised her hoof again and examined it, processing what Rainbow had just said. Then it clicked.

“Understood.” Her ears began to move as she trotted out to catch up to Rainbow Dash. “Rainbow Dash, does this mean--”

“Yeah, yeah. Come on, Turing, you’ve got a successful mission to report back to Twilight.”

And so the two newly-made friends walked to the train station. Soon they would share a deserted train car as they made their way back to the place they called home.

To be continued...

In Two Minds, Part 1

View Online

The bell rang at the door of the Ponyville Inn as it opened. The hotel manager at the front desk smiled in greeting as somepony stepped inside the lobby.

“Oh, welcome back Mr. Fine Print!” the manager said. Mostly they took in travelers who came, stayed a night, and left. The unicorn in front of her had been there for about a week and didn’t seem to be in a hurry to check out.

“Thank you, it’s good to be back!” he said. The young stallion was a pale blue color and his black mane was styled short and neatly swept over his head. He also had friendly hazel eyes and wore a stylish black shirt and a pair of dark blue denim pants. Around his neck was a camera and there was a notepad in his back pocket.

“Did you find anything interesting for your next story?”

“Nothing just yet, but I’m sure something will come up soon.”

“Oh, yes, me too!” the manager said enthusiastically. “You know, I meet a lot of travelers here, but you’re the first freelancer I’ve met. It must be exciting!”

“It has its days, yes,” he said, stepping through the lobby toward the stairs.

“Are you sure you still don’t want any housekeeping, sir?” the manager called.

“Thank you, but no. Just keep leaving clean towels on my doorstep, if you please,” he said quickly, ascending the stairs and leaving the manager behind, their conversation ending abruptly.

His room was on the top floor and thus far he was the only one up there. He climbed the stairs and entered the simple hallway, adorned with rustic decor and a throw rug on the smooth wooden floor. Unlocking the door, he entered the room and closed the door behind him, locking it once again.

The room was nice enough. Nothing like the luxurious accommodations at a hotel in Manehatten or Baltimare, but it had a bed, a bathroom, a desk, and, most importantly, a window. It was why he wanted a room on the top floor: he needed the view. He went to that window and opened the shades, letting the light in and momentarily hurting his eyes with the sudden brightness. He blinked a few times until his eyes adjusted to it, then took a small telescope from his desk and looked at the structure that dominated the view out the window.

The castle. Twilight Sparkle’s castle. He made a face as he remembered to add Princess Twilight Sparkle’s castle. He didn’t see anypony coming near the castle and there was no sign of activity on the balcony or at the windows.

Fine Print went to his desk and took out his notepad. There were other things on the desk including diagrams, some newspaper clippings, and a few small photographs that he’d been developing in the bathroom. All of the above featured the same central figure: the mechanical pony that had recently been found in the local orchard and which was now under the care of Twilight Sparkle.

He’d been around since they’d found her. He’d been there when Vanderbull had shown up and he’d read the newspaper the morning after they’d reactivated the automaton. And he’d even watched Twilight Sparkle take her shopping. And then there was the incident with that unicorn, Rarity, and the paint job, and then the race against Rainbow Dash and just yesterday they’d again been seen taking off from the castle balcony.

And just that morning, the two of them apparently arrived by train. Twilight Sparkle had been there to greet them.

He peered out the window again, furrowing his brow.

Shopping, playing dress-up, racing… what the heck is she doing? He wrote a few notes down, considering possibilities.

He took out a small device from his pocket and looked it over carefully. It was small, fairly flat, and made of metal. It had a round disc on it and a small vial attached to it with a wire. The liquid inside was thick and moved slowly as he jostled it. He might need these devices soon. Observing wasn’t getting anywhere. He needed more information.

He’d have to try to get closer to her to get any real answers.

***

“Once again, I can’t thank you enough for coming to visit us, Mr. Vanderbull!” The stationmaster of Hoofington Station, an earth pony stallion, eagerly stuck out his hoof which was taken up in a vigorous shake by the minotaur. “I just don’t know what we would have done without you!”

“Not to worry,” Vanderbull said, smiling as he released the stationmaster’s hoof. “I’m just glad the owners accepted my offer of assistance. Now, if you’ll excuse me, my assistant and I must be leaving.”

He turned, expecting to see her just behind him, but there was nothing but empty space. He sighed and began to look around for the girl, annoyed at her wandering off again.

“Gadget?” he called, his voice echoing in the lobby, momentarily startling the patrons at the ticket counter. He frowned, feeling like a fool as the ponies around him all watched him. He hated falling into stereotypes, so he usually kept his temper controlled, lest he prove ponies’ suspicions right about him and the race he represented.

He managed an apologetic smile and walked out to the platform. She wasn’t out there, so he thought she might be on the train. He walked over to Alfredo, who was standing by outside his car.

“Sir? Anything wrong?” Alfredo asked.

“Did you see Gadget come by? Did she already board the train?”

“No sir. I’m afraid I haven’t seen her. Would you like me to locate her?”

He considered that, but he supposed he’d rather do it himself. Alfredo would probably give in to whatever excuse Gadget gave and she’d trot back to the car without a second thought. He wanted to express his displeasure at her not being there.

“No, I’ll find her. Please wait here, Alfredo.”

He made his way back through the station and found her in the small courtyard in front of the station. There was a fountain and in the middle of it was a strange, elaborate device: a rotating globe with a timepiece in the center. Gadget was using her mechanical limbs to raise herself up high enough to look at it more closely, resting the front appendages on the concrete rim of the fountain as she leaned forward to look at it. In using the Point Dexter to walk and elevate herself in this manner, she somewhat resembled some kind of bug or sea creature to Vanderbull. Various travelers and bystanders slowed their pace to watch her.

“So coool,” she breathed. Suspended from her mechanical harness, her natural legs were dangling and kicking excitedly as she looked at the device.

He should have known: she’d gotten distracted again. She didn’t even notice the onlookers.

He clenched his fists. “Gadget!” he snapped.

“Whoa!” she cried, losing her balance. One of her limbs slipped from the rim of the fountain and she pitched forward, landing in the fountain’s pool with a loud splash. She emerged from the shallow pool sputtering and coughing before she looked up to see Vanderbull glowering down at her.

Drenched to the bone, her wet jacket sticking to her and her mane limply lying over her eyes and glasses, she looked up at him, color coming to her cheeks and eyes going wide as she saw the anger in his eyes. “Oh, s-sir, I’m sorry, I just saw the timepiece here and it was so intriguing that I, I just…” She looked down, hugging her wet sleeves around her and lowering her head. “I’m sorry, sir,” she said quietly.

“Gadget, I--” He was about to chastise the girl, but seeing her like this, wet and miserable and embarrassed, made him soften. Try as he might, he couldn’t stay angry at her for long. He sighed, unclenched his fists, and let a smile cross his face.

“It’s all right, my dear. Please get out of the fountain and I’ll have Alfredo get you a towel. I’d like to return to Manehatten immediately.”

He turned to go, but heard her splashing as she struggled to pull herself from the fountain. “W-wait a minute, sir!” she exclaimed. “I actually wanted to ask you something!”

“Can it wait?” he asked, his annoyance coming back.

“Um. N-no sir. Commodore, you know my day off is tomorrow, of course.”

Vanderbull nodded. “Yes. What of it?”

“Well, it’s just that our business is done here, now that you’ve made a deal with the Hoofington Station owners I mean, and I, um, I just thought that maybe I could take the scenic route back to Manehatten. You know, take a public train, make a stop here and there, and then meet you back at the office the day after tomorrow?”

He blinked, then eyed her suspiciously. “The scenic route, you say? And you wish to take the public train rather than our own. Well, the train between here and Manehatten does indeed make several stops, of course.” He leaned forward, a knowing smile on his face. “Including Ponyville.”

She chuckled, steepling her mechanical fingers nervously. “Eheheh… you know me too well, sir.”

The whole time they’d been on this trip, she’d been distracted. She’d been doing research on who might have built the automaton back in Manehatten, which they’d been told was now named “Turing Test,” and also they’d been receiving Twilight’s letters and telegrams. The last one they’d received before traveling to Hoofington was of the results of Turing and Rainbow Dash’s first race, in addition to all the data about her speed, strength, kicking power, etc. Gadget hadn’t been able to stop talking about it on the ride over.

And now, that morning at their hotel in Hoofington, they’d seen the morning edition of the Hoofington Post reporting the airship crash in the Frostmane Mountains involving the famous Canterlot pony Fancy Pants and, to their mutual surprise, apparently he and his passengers had been rescued by none other than Rainbow Dash and Turing Test. She’d been obviously bored during the trip, sighing and yawning during meetings like a child, but the news had reinvigorated her and she had barely been able to sit still all day.

“You do realize that your day off is tomorrow, and not today, don’t you?” he asked slyly.

“Um… yes, sir,” she replied.

“And I do have some things for you to do that I thought you would attend to on the train. You are not technically off the clock yet, young lady.”

She sighed, shoulders and mechanical limbs sagging. “Yes sir.”

“Which is why I expect you to spend every single moment on the public train working on those documents,” he added.

She looked up at him with disbelief. “Y-you mean--?”

“I’ll want to inspect your work the day after tomorrow. In the meantime, enjoy your holiday.” He smiled. “Give my regards to Princess Twilight.”

“Oh thank you, sir!” she cried, launching herself upward and wrapping her forelegs around his neck, causing him to stagger back from the sudden embrace. “Thank you thank you thank you!” she repeated. She let him go and started bouncing around joyfully, her mechanical limbs going wild as she did so.

“Ah, ahem, Gadget… you’re making a scene. Please try to control yourself.”

She stopped and saw several passersby staring at them. It wasn’t every day, after all, that one got to see a minotaur in a waistcoat and a soaking-wet earth pony with mechanical arms bouncing around like a filly.

She blushed, though she still giggled with excitement as Vanderbull motioned for her to follow him. “I’ll get your things and a change of clothes,” he said. “Alfredo will prepare your saddlebags. Oh, and don’t think you’ll be taking advantage of Her Highness’ hospitality by staying at the castle again. I’ll give you a little extra money for a hotel room.”

***

Twilight brushed her hair while looking in the mirror and, once satisfied with how she looked, she trotted out and made her way to her front door. She was riding high on the amazing news Turing had given to her that morning.

Friends! Rainbow Dash and Turing became friends! Oh, this is so wonderful! I was so worried about that bet of theirs, but it looks like it all worked out!

She beamed as Spike passed her in the hallway, a small handful of gems in one claw that he was apparently eating for a midday snack.

“Spike, have you seen Turing Test?” she asked him.

“She’s in her room in the hallway,” he replied. “I got her battery charged while Rainbow Dash was telling me the whole story. I can’t believe Dash got Turing to tell those other ponies to bite--”

“Yes, well, maybe that’s something we shouldn’t encourage,” Twilight said, cutting him off. “If she’s going to make friends with other ponies, maybe insults and taunts aren’t the most helpful things she could be learning.”

Spike rolled his eyes. “I guess,” he said. “It’s not like some of those Canterlot ponies couldn’t take a little back talk now and then…”

Twilight ignored him and continued to Turing Test’s room. The door was open, as it always was. Apparently Turing didn’t have a strong sense of privacy. She was sitting there in the center of the room, totally motionless until Twilight poked her head through the door.

“Um, knock knock?” Twilight said jokingly, tapping the floor with her hoof. “May I come in?”

“As this castle is your possession, you require no permission to enter, Twilight Sparkle,” Turing replied.

“Well, yes and no. I mean, it’s your room. Spike has a room now, too, and I wouldn’t go in there without asking him first either.”

Turing cocked her head to the side. Twilight had seen that enough times to know what it meant.

“What I mean is that I’m trying to respect your privacy,” she explained. “I mean, if you had something you wanted to do in here that you didn’t want anypony else to see.”

Turing was still quiet. Finally, she said, “Understood. However, that will not be necessary in my case. There are no actions I would need to hide from you, Twilight Sparkle. As my end user, you are entitled to full disclosure on any and all activities in which I engage. This includes past, present, and future actions.”

“Well, that’s… okay, sure,” Twilight replied. I swear, she said to herself, sometimes I just can’t read her. The way she talks and interacts with everypony is so different. I’d have thought anypony would want their privacy!

“Did you come to my quarters to discuss that issue?” Turing asked, drawing her out of her thoughts.

“Huh? Oh, no,” Twilight said, remembering why she’d stopped by. “I was going to go buy some apples. We’re out of them and I wanted to go pay a visit with Applejack. She should be selling some today.”

“Shall I accompany you on this outing, Twilight Sparkle?”

“Yes. I’d like you two to meet and maybe get to know each other a little better.” She retrieved her saddlebag and placed it on Turing Test. “Just, um… do me a favor and let me do most of the talking. To be honest, Applejack is a little skeptical about you.”

“Understood. You wish for me to speak less to avoid miscommunication.”

“Yes, exactly. Try to keep the chatter to a minimum.” She was about to walk out the door when she remembered something else. “Oh, and, um… please don’t tell Applejack to bite parts of you.”

***

Fine Print turned the corner as he made his way through Ponyville. He’d decided to get a little lunch and maybe ask around about the automaton when he heard a strange noise and a murmur coming from some bystanders. He knew that mechanical sound in an instant, of course: it was the whirring of gears and servos, the kind made when a certain machine was walking.

He changed course and slipped through an alleyway to get closer to the sound and heard the faint, but distinct sound of Turing Test’s voice. She was walking alongside Twilight Sparkle. For a moment, he merely smiled, seeing the two of them having some sort of conversation as they walked down the street. A few of the Ponyville citizens even smiled and waved as they passed.

She’s integrating so well, he thought to himself. Then he shook his head, putting the thought out of mind. I’ve got other things to do. Let’s see what the Princess is doing with her new toy today.

He began trailing the two of them, camera out, and began taking pictures discreetly.

***

“Apples! Get yer apples here! We got a fresh supply o’ Golden Delicious and Honeycrisps right here!”

Applejack had her cart with her and she was already doing good business as she set up not far from a small neighborhood and her favorite restaurant. The families were good customers and the chef at the restaurant nearby was glad to have fresh apples when they needed more for their Waldorf salad, their most popular menu item. It was slightly cool weather that day, so she didn’t mind just standing by and selling apples. It certainly was preferable to harvesting. Especially since…

“Ouch,” she said, wincing slightly. Her hips were aching again. She’d talked to the doctor about it the morning after they’d found the automaton. He’d acquiesced to her request for a checkup, but told her the same thing he’d said the time before. His prognosis wasn’t what she wanted to hear.

Hmph. What does he know? she thought to herself. I just need to get more sleep or somethin’.

“Applejack!”

She turned and smiled when she saw Twilight walking over. Then she frowned again when she saw who was following her.

“Uh, hey there, Twilight,” she said, trying to ignore Turing Test. “Somethin’ I can do for ya?”

“Well, I needed some apples and I also haven’t seen you for a few days, so I thought I could come buy some and we could catch up for a few minutes!”

“Aw, well that’s nice,” Applejack said. “How many ya want?”

“Uh, six of the yellow ones and six of the red ones, I think.”

“No problem.” She started to pick out the best apples for her friend and then put them into two separate sacks. But then she heard the sound of the machine as it moved up alongside her.

“W-what’s it doin’?” she asked.

“Oh, Turing’s just going to carry my apples for me. Here, let me get that.” She levitated the two sacks and put them into Turing’s saddlebags. “Thank you, Turing,” she added.

Her robotic companion said nothing, but took the apples and resumed standing next to her.

“Ya still haven’t taught it to say ‘Yer welcome’ like a normal pony?” Applejack asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Oh, well, Turing’s just, um… we’ve been teaching her other things.” She smiled, eager to tell Applejack about recent events. “She’s made so much progress! She’s… Applejack?”

Her friend had turned to look at Turing who was standing by like a soldier at attention, not saying anything.

“Applejack?” Twilight asked again, tapping her on the shoulder to get her attention.

“Hm? Oh, yeah, yeah, you were sayin’?”

“I was saying she’s made progress! She’s made friends with me, Spike, Rarity, and now Rainbow Dash! Oh my gosh, have you heard the story about what she and Rainbow did?”

“Heh,” Applejack chuckled, finally relaxing a bit. “You really think Rainbow Dash would save a dozen ponies’ lives and then not tell every mare, stallion, and foal in town about it?”

“Oh, right,” Twilight said, laughing sheepishly. “What was I thinking? So I guess the word is out. But isn’t that great that Rainbow Dash thinks of Turing Test as her friend now?”

“Yeah, I guess,” she replied uncertainly, glancing over at Turing again momentarily. “Rainbow Dash said y’all had some kinda race yesterday. Says Turing Test here got all complimentary and that she wants to protect everypony. Hooboy, I ain’t seen that gal so worked up in a blue moon!”

The two friends laughed as they stood there, but then as the laughter died away, Applejack looked over at Turing again.

“All right, I’m sorry to ask, but is she workin’ okay?”

Twilight gave her a puzzled look. “What do you mean?”

“She’s just standin’ there, not sayin’ a thing!” Applejack exclaimed. “Last time I saw her, she could at least talk.” She turned to Turing and waved a hoof in front of her face. “Hello? Anypony in there?”

When Turing remained silent and motionless, Twilight stepped in. “Turing, you’re being rude. Answer her, please.”

“Understood,” Turing said, finally acknowledging them. “In answer to your inquiries, I am functioning normally and am still capable of verbal communication.”

The suddenness of Turing’s response startled Applejack, but only for a moment. “Any reason you were just standin’ there, not sayin’ anything? You never even said so much as a ‘Hello’ to me!”

“Twilight Sparkle instructed me to keep my communication to a minimum. No speech at all was the minimum,” she replied. Twilight put a hoof to her forehead, but Turing remained oblivious as usual. “Also, since you have indicated displeasure at my lack of greeting: Hello, Applejack.”

“Bit late fer that, but, yeah, hi.” She turned to look at Twilight again, giving her a look that plainly said, “Is this gal fer real or is she really this clueless?”

“W-well, I just thought maybe we should keep things relaxed,” Twilight said. “I know you’re a little… skeptical about Turing making friends.”

“That’s true,” Applejack said. “And, uh, well, if I’m bein’ honest, Twilight, I still don’t think she can.”

“Oh come on, Applejack,” Twilight said, annoyed at her for her continued mistrust. “I already told you she’s made friends with several of us!”

“Correct. The following individuals have directly or indirectly made declarations or performed actions indicative of their friendship with me: Twilight Sparkle, Spike the Dragon, Rarity--”

“Yeah, yeah, I get that, but… look, I’m sorry, but I just don’t know if I buy it.”

“Please clarify: what are you uncertain of purchasing?”

“Oh good gravy, ya dang robot, yer as thick as day-old grits!”

“My density is significantly greater than that of ground corn, if that is the type of grit you refer to.”

“Okay, Twilight,” Applejack said, turning back to her, “this right here is the first reason why I ain’t that keen on spendin’ time with her. Everytime I open my mouth, I feel like I need a translator.”

“It is my understanding that errors in comprehension often occur with ponies that possess nonstandard accents. Could your difficulty in communication be a result of your speech patterns?”

Applejack rolled her eyes. “Right. I’m the one who talks funny,” she grumbled.

“Oh boy,” Twilight said, putting herself between the two of them. “Turing, let me handle this.”

“Understood.”

“Okay, Applejack, I get that it can be frustrating, but what’s this really about? It can’t just be because of how she talks.”

“Yer right. It ain’t,” she replied. “Look, it comes down to two things, mainly. Fer one… well, I don’t trust her. She came here lookin’ fer ya, and even though she says she don’t remember why, she could just be playin’ dumb. She might still be dangerous.”

“Applejack, if she’d wanted to hurt me, she had plenty of opportunity already.”

“Maybe so,” she replied. “But what if she’s just waitin’ fer somethin’. Maybe she’s just bein’ patient. Maybe she needs somethin’ from ya first and then when ya least expect it, she’ll walk right up and bam! You’d never see it comin’.”

“That’s ridiculous! Turing isn’t--”

“And you remember that if ya ever hurt anypony, especially my friend Twilight, ya darn contraption,” she shouted at Turing, “I’ll tear ya apart limb from limb!”

Turing moved her head slightly, ears twitching, but said nothing.

“And here’s the other reason,” Applejack went on. “I think y’all are still just imaginin’ things. She can’t really have emotions; she ain’t a real pony!”

“That’s enough, Applejack!” Twilight shouted. “Turing Test does have emotions! Turing, tell her!”

“Understood. Twilight Sparkle is correct. I have experienced a small number of emotions, including gratification, sadness, and amazement. These responses coincide with significant experiences.”

Applejack still looked doubtful. “An’ yer tellin’ me that ya made friends with ponies, then.”

Turing looked to Twilight, apparently awaiting Twilight’s permission to respond. When she nodded, she continued. “That is true. As stated earlier--”

“Yeah, yeah, they think of you as a friend now. I get that. I really do. I’ve known Rarity and Rainbow Dash a long time and they both talk like y’all are peas in a pod. But that ain’t the problem.” She leaned in close to Turing. “What I really wanna know is, how do you feel about them?”

Turing Test cocked her head. “Please specify.”

“I mean it seems obvious that they like you. But what about you? Do you like them back?”

Twilight expected Turing to say “Yes” immediately. She did not. In fact, she only cocked her head to the side again. And Twilight’s heart sank.

“T-Turing? Will you please answer Applejack’s question?”

Turing didn’t seem to hear her at first, but then said, “Processing inquiry… inconclusive.”

“Heh. Figured,” Applejack said, sighing. She looked back at Twilight. “Look, I’m real sorry, sugarcube, but I think she’s either been lyin’ about any feelings she’s had or maybe she just doesn’t know what they mean. But either way, you an’ I both know that ya can’t be friends if ya don’t like each other.”

Twilight was silent. She struggled to find the right words, but she hadn’t been expecting this.

“Look here, robot,” Applejack said, getting Turing’s attention. “Rarity, Spike, Rainbow Dash… they’re all my friends. My real friends. An’ they all seem to like you, and if they knew that you didn’t like ‘em back, well, it would just tear ‘em up inside. Heck, look at Twilight. Poor gal took you in an’ stood up fer ya an’ treated ya like a member of her own family an’ you… ya cain’t even say ya like her?”

Turing looked over at Twilight, who was looking back at her expectantly.

“Turing… I order you… answer her.”

Turing looked back at Applejack. “Inconclusive.”

The three stood in silence. Applejack saw that Twilight was becoming more upset and went over to her, hugging her gently. “There there, I know,” she whispered. “I’m sorry, Twi. I hoped I was wrong too, but…”

“I-I’m okay,” Twilight said, gently removing herself from Applejack’s embrace. “I’ve… I’ve got some thinking to do.”

“Twilight Sparkle, do you wish to--”

“Not now. Let’s just go home, Turing.” She’d already turned to go, and so Turing simply followed her. The two did not speak on the trip back.

***

Fine Print rushed back to his hotel room, nearly knocking over bystanders as he galloped back the way he came. Normally he would have tried to follow Twilight and Turing back to the castle, but this was important. He wasn’t able to get very close to them, but it was obvious that something had gone wrong. Twilight seemed upset, Applejack was raising her voice, and both of them seemed agitated about something that the automaton had said.

If Twilight had lost her patience with the automaton, then that could be a major development in the situation. He’d have to write this down, consider what to do next.

He entered the front door of his hotel and dashed up the stairs, not stopping to even say hello to the hotel manager at the front desk. He was nearly at his room when the door on the opposite side of the hallway opened and somepony stepped out of it. He froze and tried to stop his momentum, but the carpet under him continued under his momentum and slid to a stop right before the newcomer as she exited the room. She gasped as she turned to see him sitting there.

“Oh!” she cried, and to his amazement, a series of strange mechanical arms rose up to shield her. When she saw that he had stopped short of her, the arms lowered and they both got a look at each other.

She was a mare - though small and fairly young, maybe 5 years younger than himself - with a cream-colored coat. She wore a loose, black jacket with many pockets and had a messy brown mane and a pair of glasses over her eyes. But most surprising was that those mechanical arms he saw were poking through holes in the back of her jacket and apparently coming from something on her back.

“Excuse me, miss,” Fine Print said, smiling nervously. “I was in a hurry and you startled me a little.” He stepped off the carpet and stood to his full height. “My name is Fine Print and I’m in the room across from yours.” He offered his hoof in greeting.

“Oh, I’m--” she reached for his hoof with one of her mechanical hands absentmindedly, then pulled it back and shook it with her own hoof when she realized her mistake. “Er, G-Gadget. My name is Gadget,” she said. “I just checked in a few minutes ago.”

“Nice to meet you. I’m a freelance reporter and I… I’m sorry but these are amazing!” he exclaimed, gesturing at her artificial limbs, and walked over to her side. “Where did you get these?”

“I actually built these myself,” she said. “I’m an engineer.”

“Engineer? Wait…” Then it clicked. “You’re Cornelius Vanderbull’s assistant! I remember seeing you about a week ago! But when I saw you, you didn’t have these on. And you say you built them? Wow, you must be brilliant!”

“Oh, I’m not… I’m not so special,” she said modestly, and she started to blush slightly at the compliment.

“Are you kidding me? Look at how dexterous and flexible these things are! I bet they’re strong, too!” He took hold of one of the mechanical arms and looked at it closely. He then ran a hoof along its smooth, chrome surface. She drew in a breath sharply and her blush deepened.

“Um, Mr. Fine Print, I can… I can feel that. P-please stop touching them.”

“Huh? Oh!” he exclaimed, dropping the limb. And then it was his turn to blush. “I’m so sorry, I didn’t realize!” He took a few steps back, giving her some space.

“It’s okay, you didn’t know,” she said, chuckling nervously. “They’re just powered by my own earth pony magic, so I can feel them like they were my own limbs.”

“Extending your magical essence like that… wow… you really are incredible. Let me guess: you used magic-based neural interface scaffolding to control a biomimetic internal structure?”

Her eyes went wide. “Yes, exactly! How in the world did you guess that?!”

“Ah, well,” he coughed nervously, backing away slightly. “I’m… kind of a geek for technology and stuff like that, I guess. I pick up a lot of things interviewing different engineers for science articles. Um, but anyway, what are you doing back here in Ponyville?”

“I’m here to visit my friend, Princess Twilight Sparkle,” she replied. “I also want to check in on her automa-- oh right, she’s calling her a ‘robot’ now. Anyway, I’m checking in on Princess Twilight and her robot friend, Turing Test.”

Fine Print’s eyes widened with interest. “Well, that is fascinating. I’d be interested in talking to that, um, robot.”

“I’m already stopping by unannounced,” she said sheepishly, “so I can’t speak for them, but… well, maybe I can see if the Princess and Turing would be interested in an interview. I should probably get going, sir.”

“Just Fine Print, please,” he said, flashing a friendly smile.

She turned to go, but then stopped and said, “I’m here until the day after tomorrow. Will… that is, will you be here that long?”

“Oh yes. I’d love to talk more,” he said. He paused a moment, his blush returning, and added, “P-perhaps we could discuss things over lunch tomorrow?”

If he’d never seen her natural cream-colored coat before, he would have sworn that it was naturally pink from how deeply she was blushing. She hesitated and he realized that he’d perhaps gone too far.

“Ah, I’m sorry, I’ve been too forward,” he said, bowing his head. “After all, you just met me, and you’re a young lady...”

“N-now hold on, I’m an adult… m-mostly… and I didn’t say no!” she cried. She paused, swallowing hard before she continued. “I-I’d like that. It’s just lunch after all.” She smiled. “I’d love to talk more later.”

He smiled. “All right. Noon tomorrow. See you then, Gadget.” And with that, he turned and entered his own room.

Once he was gone, Gadget kicked her forelegs into the air gleefully and made her way down the steps.

Back in his room, Fine Print had to take a deep breath to get his heart to slow down. He had a job to do, he told himself, and letting a cute mare distract him at this point would be a disaster.

He went to his desk to take down some notes and begin planning for what to do next.

***

Twilight and Turing Test entered the castle and walked through the main hall. Spike was walking toward them to greet them.

“Hi Twilight, hi Turing! Did you get some apples?”

“Yes,” Twilight said, walking brusquely past Spike while levitating the saddlebags off of Turing over to him. “Please put them in the kitchen.”

He noticed her tone and frowned as he took the bags. “Um, do you want me to start fixing lunch? Oh, and how was Applejack? Did she warm up to Turing at all? Or--”

“Spike, I need to talk to Turing alone. Yes, please go fix lunch. I’ll be there in an hour.”

“Um… all right,” he said, looking worriedly over his shoulder as he made his way to the kitchen.

Twilight and Turing, meanwhile, went to her bedroom. She closed the door behind them just to make sure Spike didn’t hear the conversation.

“You are distressed, Twilight Sparkle,” Turing observed.

“Gee, you think?! What tipped you off?” She rolled her eyes to punctuate her sarcasm.

“Your facial expression, tone of voice, and--”

“Yes, I get it. And yes, I am distressed!” She sat down on the rug near her bed and let out a heavy sigh. “How can you not be able to answer Applejack’s question, Turing?”

“You refer to her inquiry, ‘Do you like them back?’ correct?” she asked.

“I mean the general implied question, yes! Your goal is to make friends, and I thought you were! But then you can’t answer that question?” Twilight stared at her, looking for some kind of reaction.

As always, Turing simply stood there.

“I just want to know if you like us. Do you like Rarity, Rainbow Dash, Spike… me?”

Turing moved her ears slightly and said, “Results are still inconclusive.”

“But why? Why is that question so hard to answer? It should be easy!”

“The word ‘like’ is difficult to qualify. Are you stating a matter of preference, affection, or some other quality?”

Twilight blinked. “I mean affection, yes, of course. Turing, I gave you a directive when we first activated you. I told you to ‘Make friends.’ Do you even know what the word ‘friend’ means?”

“Affirmative. The word was in my default database. ‘Friend (noun): a pony or other being attached to another by feelings of affection or personal regard; a pony or other being who gives assistance; a patron; a supporter...’”

“Yes, okay, let’s focus on the first part there,” Twilight said. “A pony attached to another by feelings of affection. That’s important, don’t you think?”

“By that definition, I do not see any contradiction or problem. All of the previously mentioned subjects have expressed affection for me.”

“That’s only half of it, Turing!” Twilight cried. “Yes, they like you, they feel affection for you. But do you feel the same way about them? Do you… don’t you have affection for them?” She swallowed. “Don’t you feel that way about me?”

“Affection…” Turing tilted her head to the left and to the right. “That emotion seems to be common among organic ponies. I have attempted to qualify it and all results are inconclusive. I have not determined that I have such an emotion or am capable of having it.”

She looked directly at Twilight then, her unblinking violet eyes staring out at her. Twilight recalled the time when she’d found Turing staring at her in her bedroom the night she’d first activated her. And once again she felt like she was staring at something strange, something alien, something…

Something distinctly different from herself.

(“...when ya least expect it, she’ll walk right up and bam! You’d never see it comin’.”)

She shook her head, trying to shake Applejack’s words from her mind as Turing continued:

“If you refer to affection, then I believe with my inconclusive information I must answer negatively,” Turing said. “I do not like you.”

Twilight’s jaw dropped open.

“My answer has displeased you, Twilight Sparkle.” It was not a question.

“Turing… please, just… go to your room.”

“Understood. For what length of time--”

“I don’t know! For a while!” she exploded. “Just stay in there and shut the door! I need to be alone!”

Turing stood there and at first Twilight thought she hadn’t heard. But then, without another word, Turing turned and exited her room, the sound of her metallic hoofsteps slowly fading as she moved down the hallway.

Only when she was sure that Turing was out of earshot did she shut her own door and finally broke down. She pulled one of her pillows over to herself and buried her face in it, the surface dampening with her tears.

I thought I had done it… I thought I was really teaching her to be friends this whole time. But I wasn’t! She stomped her hoof in frustration. She doesn’t care at all! I’ve… I’ve failed…

She took several minutes to compose herself. Eventually, the rumbling in her belly caused her to make her way down to the dining room. She soon heard that Spike already setting the table. Maybe some food would make her feel a little better.

“Huh? Oh, Twilight!” Spike exclaimed happily as she entered the room. “Um, I know it’s a surprise, but we’ve got company!”

“Company?” Twilight asked drearily as she slowly raised her head.

“SURPRISE!” And then Gadget dropped down into view, having hid herself by hanging from the ceiling via her mechanical hands. “Hi Princess Twilight! I just came into town and… oh…” She noticed Twilight’s bloodshot eyes and it was fairly obvious she’d been crying. “Oh no.” She dropped down from the ceiling, her hooves clattering as she did so, and bowed her head. “Is… is this a bad time?”

Twilight opened her mouth and was about to answer, but then paused, considering the situation. “Set an extra place at the table, Spike. I think Gadget and I have a lot to talk about.”

To be continued…

In Two Minds, Part 2

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Gadget just picked at her salad after hearing Twilight’s story.

“That’s… that’s a lot more than I was expecting,” she said finally. “I really thought, you know, after all your letters, that things would be different around here.”

“They are!” Twilight exclaimed. “Well, they were. I really thought we’d made all this progress. Ponies have been starting to accept her and even Turing is starting to be more pleasant to talk to. But then she had to say something like that to me.”

Twilight sighed. She was glad to have Gadget there, even though she felt guilty dropping all her troubles on her. Neither one of them had eaten much of the salad that Spike had prepared.

“You haven’t told Spike any of this yet?” Gadget asked.

They both glanced over to the seat he’d vacated at the table.

“I know he can tell that something is up.” She took another bite before continuing. “And I hated to ask him to let us talk in private, but… honestly I think he’d be even more hurt if he’d heard her. Spike was getting friendly with Turing even before I was!”

Gadget crossed her forelegs, closing her eyes as she mulled the situation over.

“She just flat out said she doesn’t like me,” Twilight said quietly. “All this time I thought we were friends…”

It was pretty terrible when one said it like that. There were few things short of vulgarity that so clearly indicated unfriendliness more than “I don’t like you.”

“Um… Gadget?” Twilight asked, getting her attention. “Would you mind not doing that, please?”

“Huh?” And then she heard a strange metallic tapping sound and saw that one of her mechanical hands had been drumming its fingers on the table.

“Darn it, Front Leftie!” she growled, and the hand immediately lifted, holding itself up in mock surrender. She rolled her eyes and turned her attention back to Twilight, letting one of her more obedient hands adjust her glasses as she began to speak.

“Maybe it’s not so bad, Princess Twilight,” she said. “I mean, does it really matter if she likes you back?”

“Yes!” Twilight cried. “Imagine if, after all the time you’ve spent with Mr. Vanderbull, he said he didn’t like you! Or if any other friend of yours said it!”

She considered that and finally nodded reluctantly. “Okay, that’s true. If Mr. Vanderbull told me he didn’t like me and wanted to get a new assistant or something like that, I’d be devastated!”

Twilight nodded solemnly, closing her eyes and lowering her head. “Exactly. I thought I was developing a connection with her and it turns out it was all for nothing. It really meant nothing to her!

Gadget considered this, rubbing her chin thoughtfully. “Well, do you still care about her?”

“Yes, of course I do!” Twilight was again immediate in her answer. “That’s why it hurts so much to hear her say otherwise.”

“That’s good… all things considered,” Gadget said.

“Yeah,” Twilight said. Then she noted Gadget’s hesitation on that last part. “Wait, what do you mean?”

Gadget looked away and nibbled on another leaf of lettuce.

“Gadget,” Twilight said firmly, “please tell me. What do you mean?”

“It’s… well, your earlier letter told me that Princess Celestia came to talk to you about Turing. And you were relieved when Princess Celestia decided to trust you. But you also said that if Turing really couldn’t learn friendship, then Celestia would…”

Twilight’s eyes widened. “Oh no.”

“Princess,” Gadget said, breaking their silence, “if you really care about Turing, then would you really abandon her?”

“I… I can’t just lie to Celestia about it. Eventually, I’ll have to tell her the truth.”

“But you’re a Princess too; she can’t tell you what to do!”

“Princess of Friendship; I’m not a head of state the way she is!”

The same heavy silence hung over them once again. They continued their lunch for a few more minutes so that the only sound between them was the sound of chewing.

“Is that really the kind of situation you want to put Turing in, Princess?” Gadget asked finally. “Because that’s a pretty horrible ultimatum: make friends or die.”

Twilight made a face as if wounded.

“S-sorry,” Gadget said. “I just… I just think…”

“Look, I said I cared and I meant it. But I can’t disobey Princess Celestia.”

Gadget started to say something and shut her mouth. Then her eyes hardened and she steeled herself. “You wouldn’t ever disobey her? Ever?”

“I never have. She’s so kind, and so wise… if she says something’s the right thing to do, then I trust her!”

“Even if it’s murdering an innocent pony?”

“It’s… it’s not murder, Gadget, she’s not really a pony.”

Gadget stared at her, quaking with sudden rage. “So if Celestia outright demanded that you give Turing Test over to her--”

“--Then I would, of course!”

“Well, what if you’re wrong? What if she really is a pony?”

“She’s not!”

“You don’t know that!”

“I… that’s not…”

“I’m not trying to make this harder for you, Twilight, but…” She sighed, slumping forward on the table. “This situation is awful. I wasn’t ready for this.”

“I know, I know, it’s really terrible no matter how we look at it. I don’t know what I should do.” Twilight pushed her salad bowl away. “I think I’ve lost my appetite.”

Gadget did the same. “Me too.”

“I’m really sorry that you came in the middle of all this trouble,” Twilight said. “But I am glad you’re here.” She smiled weakly.

“I’m glad to be here too.” Gadget returned the smile, and seemed to perk up slightly. “Besides, I’m here for today and through tomorrow. And it’s not like you have to make a decision immediately. Maybe I can help you, and you can make a plan to help Turing Test!”

Twilight nodded. “That’s true. I guess it hasn’t even been very long since what happened with Applejack. I don’t want to make any quick decisions.”

Gadget scrunched her eyes shut, crossing her forelegs again (her mechanical arms following suit this time). “Hmm. Could I, um… talk to her?”

“Turing? Sure. I’m not sure what good it will do, but you’re welcome to try it.”

“All right. Where is she?”

“I sent her to her room.”

Gadget gave her a sideways glance and then cracked a grin. “What next? If she keeps misbehaving, she’s grounded for a month, no boy-bots and no parties?”

Twilight rolled her eyes.

***

The door opened and Gadget poked her head through into the small room. “Turing?” she asked cautiously.

Turing Test was sitting in the middle of the room, perfectly still except for her ears which twitched on their hinges, squeaking as they did so. “Gadget Giroux. I detected your voice in the hallway. Welcome to my domicile.”

“Thanks! It’s…” she noted it contained a generator, a mirror, a can of metal polish with a rag, and nothing else, save for its occupant. “It’s very spacious,” she said, closing the door behind her. “Um, you know, you could have come out and said hello if you heard me.”

“My apologies, but I could not. Twilight Sparkle ordered me to stay in this room for awhile. I did not have her permission to leave.”

“I see,” Gadget said. Since Gadget had entered the room, Turing had not turned toward her in the slightest. She merely sat before the tall mirror, her back to Gadget the whole time. Gadget moved next to Turing and sat down herself on the smooth, cold floor, flinching at its chilliness.

“Um… so, how’s it going?”

Turing finally moved her head to look at Gadget, the suddenness of the movement making her gasp in surprise. “Clarification required: what is going?”

“Uh, let me restate that. How are you?”

“I am functioning normally.”

“Oh. Good.” Gadget nodded, letting her eyes fall on the mirror. “What’s with the mirror? I mean, why do you have a mirror?”

“The mirror allows me to view my own image.”

“Yes, I get that,” Gadget said. “But why are you looking at it?”

“To view my own image in the mirror.”

Gadget groaned and smacked her forehead with her hoof. Turing noticed this immediately, her ears twitching. And then she did something that really caught Gadget’s attention.

While looking in the mirror, she smacked her own forehead with her hoof, a loud bell-like clang sounding through the room.

“Turing? Did you just mimic me?”

“Affirmative. I am attempting mimicry of organic ponies’ expressions, gestures, and movements. I have recorded many such movements and am now attempting to emulate them. I have noticed that such expressions often serve as means of nonverbal communication or as means of emphasizing the points of verbal communication. The mirror assists me in making a visual comparison with my memory.”

“Oh, I see!” Gadget said, nodding emphatically. She smiled, happy to at last have some answer of why Turing needed the mirror.

“This gesture you made…” She smacked her forehead again, creating the same loud clang as before. “It seems illogical to attempt injury to one’s cranium. Yet I see it often as a reaction to things I say or do. What is the meaning of this gesture?”

Gadget stood up again, light on her feet and eager to answer. “I can tell you! It’s just something we ponies do when we are exasperated!”

“This explains a great deal. Thank you, Gadget.”

“Wait, ‘Thank you?’ For what?”

“Twilight Sparkle and I had an altercation. I am still attempting to analyze it. In previous interactions, both she and other ponies have often made a similar gesture. I must be exceedingly exasperating. That may explain why Twilight Sparkle is disappointed with me.”

Gadget sat back down. “She’s not… I mean, she didn’t say that, did she?”

“While it is true that she did not say that exactly, it is very likely her assessment of me. She explained to me that friendship must involve mutual feelings of affection. As I have yet to experience such an emotion, my previous efforts that were deemed successes must now be deemed failures. I am without friends and therefore I have failed in my directive.”

“Turing…”

“I am attempting to remedy the situation. It is possible that my inability to properly integrate with organic ponies is also preventing me from achieving a similar mental state. If I can become more like an organic, then I may once again achieve success with my directive.”

Gadget just stared at her. It seemed simplistic to her: ‘act like a pony and you’ll be like a pony.’ It was like a child wearing their parents’ clothes to be like their mommy or daddy. But the fact that Turing could recognize that something was wrong might be a step in the right direction. Just the same, she wasn’t exactly sure what to do or say to help the poor robot.

“Gadget,” Turing said, jolting her back to reality, “did you come to visit Twilight Sparkle or perhaps to perform maintenance on me?”

“I actually came to visit all of you. Not just Twilight.”

“Now that you have done so, will you return to Manehatten?”

“I’m actually here for a little while. If Twilight doesn’t mind, I’ll be able to spend time here until the day after tomorrow.” She smiled. “I think I’d better go talk to Twilight. But I’ll come visit you later on, if you’re okay with that!”

“You do not require my permission to spend time with me.”

Gadget frowned, but pressed on, undeterred. “Turing Test, I want to spend time with you. I’m saying that I will if you’d like me to talk more to you.”

Turing’s face, so devoid of normal facial features, was inscrutable. But then Gadget watched as she slowly placed a hoof to her chin and rubbed it, creating an irritating scraping sound

But suddenly Gadget’s eyes went wide in amazement as the significance of the action and all that she’d said dawned on her.

“I believe that might be a positive experience.”

Gadget didn’t respond. She was still breathless as the truth became clear. She’s thinking. Honest to goodness, not just processing, she’s thinking about herself!

She swallowed, managing to contain herself. “I’m glad. I’ll be back later on!” Gadget exclaimed happily. “See you later, Turing!”

“Understood. And Gadget?”

Gadget turned, her mechanical hand already turning the doorknob. “Yes, Turing?”

“While I am confined to this room, I am unable to perform my duties and assist Twilight Sparkle. Will you please assist her in my absence?”

Gadget smiled. “Of course.”

***

Twilight was pacing back in the throne room, the large round table in the center of the room magically displaying the map of Equestria. She looked it over, merely biding her time until at last Gadget entered the room.

“Did you talk to her? What did she say?” Twilight asked, running over eagerly.

“It’s amazing!” Gadget cried as Twilight ran up to her. “Turing is… she’s trying to imitate body language!”

Twilight’s enthusiasm drained away. “She’s… what? Why?”

“She thinks that by acting like a pony she can be more like a pony. I think she means feelings, too.”

Twilight sighed. “That’s not going to work.”

“No, probably not. But that’s not the point!”

Twilight raised an eyebrow. “Well, what is the point?”

“The point is that she’s not just sitting in that room waiting for the next order!” She was so excited about this apparently mundane fact that she lifted herself off the ground on her mechanical arms. “She’s considering, pondering, and making active adjustments based on how she sees herself!”

“Isn’t that… isn’t that what she’s supposed to do?”

“To a certain extent, yes,” Gadget admitted, rolling her eyes, “but this… this means she’s being more than just intelligent… she’s being creative!”

“Well, yes, I know she can do that.” Twilight shrugged her shoulders. “She did some of that in her race with Rainbow Dash.”

Gadget groaned in frustration, realizing she wasn’t expressing her discovery well enough. She set herself back down on the ground. “Twilight, this isn’t just coming up with a strategy. This is recognition of her own place in the world and her current situation. Instead of the dumb machine we saw a week ago that just demanded Fluttershy be friends, she’s responding to her perceived failure and doing something about it!”

Twilight blinked, still not getting it.

“Don’t you see? She’s becoming self-aware! Twilight, this is a huge breakthrough! Signs of self-awareness like this could mean she’s sentient! She might become just as sentient as anypony else!”

Twilight nodded, finally understanding, but frowned. “I… I don’t know, Gadget. I thought the same thing might have been true before, but… I just don’t know.”

Gadget sagged. “Really? But…”

“I just have to wonder how she could really be sentient or even anything like us if she can’t feel emotions. And I’m not sure she really can.” She swallowed. “I’m not saying you’re wrong. I just need time to think about it.”

Gadget slowly exhaled, letting her tension go as her stiff limbs relaxed once again. “Right. Of course, I understand. Um… well, should I… leave you for now so you can think about it?”

“Actually, I think I’d like your company. This is all really serious and I think I need to step back before I worry myself into a psychotic episode!” She let out a long sigh. “I don’t think I can talk about this with my other friends, and honestly I could use something to take my mind off this. I could really use a friend right now to help me calm down. I hate to impose, but I’d love your company if you would like to stay!”

Gadget smiled. “Yes, of course! I’d be glad to help!”

“Great! Well, let’s start by cutting out all the serious talk. I don’t suppose anything interesting has happened lately that you want to talk about?”

Gadget looked up and to the left, and Twilight detected the slight blush that came to her cheeks.

“Gadget? Are you hiding something?” she asked, leaning forward with sudden interest.

“N-no, it’s nothing.” Then she smiled, brushing her hair to one side with her hoof before quietly adding, “I… um, I met a cute stallion today.”

Twilight grinned brightly. “Ooh, give me details!”

“He’s a freelance reporter staying in Ponyville Inn across from my room. And, um, we met before we came over here and he’s really smart and he’s got these deep hazel eyes… and w-we’re having lunch together tomorrow!”

“Oh wow!” Twilight exclaimed. “But aren’t you a little young for a date?”

“I am not!” she cried, stamping her hoof indignantly. “A-and it’s just lunch! It’s not… it’s not… th-that word...”

Twilight grinned. “Well… that’s interesting. Maybe I can help you.”

“Help me? What do you mean?”

“Well, do you have anything nice to wear for it?”

“I’ve got my jacket, so I was just going to… well, I mean, if you think I should wear something else,” she swallowed, “then I guess maybe I… I don’t have anything.”

“Then I know just what to do! Come on, Gadget, we better go before she gets too busy with somepony else!” That said, she grabbed her by the hoof and led her to the door.

“‘She?’ Who?”

“Who else?” she laughed. “Rarity!”

***

Fine Print was eating a simple muffin he’d bought from a nearby bakery as he peered through his spyglass at the castle. He was about to give up and develop his new photos when he saw movement at the castle door.

Well, what do we have here?

He squinted, refocusing the telescope to get a better look. Presently, he began to see that two figures were leaving. Twilight and…

“Gadget,” he whispered. A brief smile flashed across his face. His heart skipped a beat as he remembered their plans for lunch the next day. But then he remembered the task at hoof and he sighed, closing his eyes and snapping the telescope shut before placing it back on his desk.

With the Princess and Gadget leaving, maybe the automaton will be by itself. Now’s my chance to get close to it!

He grabbed his notepad and camera and dashed out the door. If he hurried, he might just be able to get to the castle and inside in less than five minutes. He might be able to get in and out without ever being detected.

***

“My my my, how exciting!”

Rarity was abuzz, holding up one dress after another in front of Gadget, giving it either a quick nod or a disdainful shake of her head, after which she laid it on the “try on” or “reject” pile respectively.

“And I’m so glad you came to me for help!” Rarity paused to beam at Gadget. “You are going to look gorgeous on your date!”

“Oh jeez, Miss Rarity,” Gadget said, practically burying her face in her hooves as she giggled. “I really wish you and Twilight would stop calling it that. I keep telling you that it’s just lunch!”

Twilight and Rarity exchanged a look. Twilight was sitting on a stool nearby as Rarity carefully selected accessories that might go with the dresses she’d chosen.

“Sure,” Twilight said, trying to sound genuine. “Just lunch.”

Rarity didn’t feel the need to conceal her doubt. “If it’s just lunch, then why is your face redder than Tirek with a sunburn, darling?”

Gadget couldn’t help but erupt into even more giggles. She took a deep breath, trying to get herself under control.

“Well, calm down and tell us a bit about the young gentleman.” She levitated a dress over to her. “And do try this on while you’re doing so, please.”

“W-well, like I told Twilight, he’s a freelance journalist and he’s staying in the same hotel as me.” She had shed her jacket and removed the Point Dexter and began to put on a simple pink dress. “He’s got a pale blue coat and big hazel eyes and he's got a short, shiny black mane that just slightly falls in his eyes.” She sighed dreamily as she put the dress on.

“He sounds enchanting,” Rarity said, though she frowned at Gadget’s dress. “This color on the other hand is simply horrid. Try this one instead.”

“So, what else can you tell us about him?” Twilight asked eagerly.

“He’s a unicorn. Um, he seems very polite, although maybe a little clumsy… he nearly ran right into me in the hotel hallway.” She grunted as she managed to pull the dress on. “And he knows a lot about engineering!”

“Engineering?” Twilight asked, surprised that anypony knew enough to impress a genius like Gadget.

“Uh huh,” Gadget replied. “How do I look, Miss Rarity?”

“Not as good as you could look. Ah ha, I have it!” Rarity left for a moment, checking her back room. “Now this is sure to do the trick!” she exclaimed.

“What do you mean he knows a lot about engineering, Gadget?” Twilight asked. “How do you know?”

“Well, he knew that the Point Dexter uses a magical nerve interface scaffold to connect to my own nervous system and that the arms work by mimicking the same structure. Biomimicry isn’t easy, but with enough time and patience, you could--”

“Whoa, whoa, whoa,” Twilight said, holding up her hooves. “That’s… I don’t even know what you said!”

“It’s not exactly a common term,” Gadget replied, hastily adding, “n-no offense, Twilight.”

“None taken. Still, lucky you! Cute and smart is a good combination!”

“I’ve got the perfect dress for you, Gadget,” Rarity said, returning from the back room. “This little number will be just what you need to look your best tomorrow!”

“Oh, I like this one already!” Gadget cried eagerly. She quickly began trying the new dress on.

“Glad you think so,” Rarity said, “and I’m also happy you’ve met such an interesting gentleman. It’s not every day you encounter somepony like that.”

Gadget looked herself over in the mirror. The dress was simple, nothing too formal for a lunch date. The top was white with a charcoal gray collar and a yellow neckerchief. The skirt-like train was pleated and the same gray as the collar and it curved gently back over her flank.

She smiled, looking herself in the mirror, turning to see it from different positions, even making little pouty faces like a model. Finally she turned to Rarity and said “I love it. It’s wonderful, Rarity.”

“You look simply adorable!” Rarity beamed with pride, pleased with another happy customer and with another fashion success.

“Um… do you think you could modify it a little? I’d like some holes in the back so I can fit my mechanical arms through it.”

Rarity’s smile shifted slightly, but stayed in place. “Ah, well, do you really think you need those devices for a simple lunch?”

“Ever since I helped fix Turing, I’ve gotten more and more used to wearing them.” She quietly added, “And Fine Print really seems to like them. A lot of ponies are a little weirded out by them, but he… he actually came right up and touched them.” Her blush returned.

“Hm, well, see to it that he doesn’t get any grabbier,” Rarity warned her. “But… well, if I can make room for pegasus wings, then I suppose I could do the same for your extra limbs. At least let me add some buttons to cover the holes so you could wear it without the arms on occasion.”

“That’s so nice! It won’t be any trouble, will it?”

“Not at all. And if Mr. Fine Print enjoys technology, then who am I to argue?” She paused as a thought occurred to her. “You should tell him about Turing Test. That would be a nice topic of conversation, don’t you think?”

Gadget and Twilight both went silent. Rarity, already getting her supplies to modify Gadget’s dress, did not notice their change in demeanor.

“Yes,” Gadget replied flatly. She hesitated a moment longer before asking, “Miss Rarity… you’re friends with Turing Test now, right?”

“Why yes, I am!” Rarity replied. Twilight, Gadget noted, didn’t say anything and her expression did not change, though she did glance over at her.

“I haven’t seen her growth at all this week,” Gadget continued, “but Twilight told me a little bit about it in her letters. Would you mind telling me how you feel about Turing or what you think of her?”

“I’d be delighted. Could you give me that dress over so I can modify it?” Gadget removed it and gave it to her. “Now, let’s see… I suppose that at first I was just as wary of her as anypony else, except of course for Twilight. But then she and Spikey came through the door asking me to help her look her best. Of course that didn’t really work out. Twilight told you what happened, didn’t she?”

“That you had her painted and a freak rainstorm washed it all off of her.”

“Yes.” She sighed. “When I saw her sitting there in the mud, all that beautiful paint washed right off her, her ears down… oh, it was just heartbreaking!” She took a breath, trying to compose herself. “I never would have thought it possible. She is a machine after all, and not terribly expressive at that… but then she told us she was ‘sad.’ She’d never been sad before and she felt so horrible because she thought she’d let Twilight down and I… I’m sorry, it just made me realize that deep down she really does have a heart. Or the mechanical equivalent of one, I suppose. And it is a good heart.”

She grinned slightly, carefully cutting the fabric in four places, making the holes for Gadget’s mechanical arms. She also took some thread and began to add the buttons and buttonholes. “You know, she talks like a textbook and she’s strong as can be, but that day I realized she might as well be a child.”

“A child?” Twilight echoed.

“Mm-hm.” Rarity gave a quick nod as she continued working on the dress, not looking up to see the surprise evident in Twilight’s face. “After all, she’s less than a week old and knows so little about the world or even her own feelings on the occasion of having them. Poor dear, this must be exceptionally hard for her.”

Twilight and Gadget shared a look. Neither one could exactly look the other in the eye.

“There we are! Perfect!” At last, Rarity raised her head only to notice Twilight and Gadget’s sudden somber mood. “Hm? Is something wrong, darlings?”

***

Fine Print had examined the castle from every angle. The windows were high up and would be difficult to open without knowing how to unlatch them, even with magic. And he’d never be able to just bring a ladder over to one and get in that way, at least not without somepony noticing. The balcony was likewise too high up to make for a good entry point. That just left the obvious entrance: the front door.

If it’s unlocked, then this should be easy. If it’s locked, then I still have a shot. I could try to unlock it or force my way in. Hopefully I can do it without attracting attention.

The nearby houses were probably occupied, but that didn’t mean anypony was home right now or that the Princess’s neighbors would constantly be watching out their windows. Maybe it would be simple.

He casually walked over to the door, acting natural as he could, checking his peripheral vision and taking care not to look nervous as he gave a slight glance over his shoulder. Nopony was watching.

He walked right up to the elegant double doors and used his magic to turn the knob. It didn’t budge.

Locked. Great.

He rattled the door slightly, just to see if it moved. It didn’t. He carefully examined the keyhole, considering how he might best gain access.

He heard a sound at the door and stepped back, tensing up as the door slowly opened.

“Uh, hello?” Spike said, poking his head out the door. “Oh. Hello, sir. I heard you at the door. I’m Spike, her assistant. Can I help you?”

Her dragon! How could I have forgotten him?! All right, he’s being polite, I just have to work with it…

“Hello! I’m sorry for the disturbance.” He bowed his head slightly and gave his very best smile. “I’m a reporter! Is Her Highness, Princess Twilight, in at the moment?”

“No, she stepped out,” Spike said.

“Ah, well, that’s not a problem. I actually wanted to talk to the automaton she’s been keeping.”

Spike’s eyes widened. “Turing Test? Why her?”

“Are you kidding? A lot of ponies are interested in it!”

“Her.”

He blinked. “What?”

“I said, ‘Her.’ Please call her that, not ‘it.’”

Fine Print narrowed his eyes, examining Spike carefully. He wasn’t angry, nor was he toying with him. “Ah, all right,” he replied. “A lot of ponies are interested in her. I’d love to get a one-on-one interview and get her story! What do you say?”

Spike crossed his arms, a sour look on his face. “I don’t think so. Not without Twilight’s permission.”

“Oh? Even for just a few short questions?”

“Sorry, mister,” Spike said, “but I really think Twilight would want to know.”

Dutiful little thing, eh? He maintained his smile. “I suppose that’s true. But she did leave you in charge, right?”

“Y-yeah, I guess so.”

“I could do an interview with you too, in that case. Ever been in the newspaper? Or even a magazine?” He wiggled his eyebrows tantalizingly.

“Wow! No way, nopony ever… well… I mean, I’d still like to, but… um, no, sorry mister, but I can’t let you in without Twilight’s permission. I think that they’re having some kind of trouble.”

Fine Print leaned forward with interest and Spike knew he’d said too much.

“Look, I can’t talk any more. I don’t really know that much. Can you come back later?”

I could force my way in. He doesn’t look so tough. Then again, he is a dragon. I bet he bites, and he probably breathes fire. Still, I’ve got my things… no, that would cause too much commotion. Fine, I’ll play it cool.

“Sure. Well, sorry about that. Nice meeting you, Spike.” And with that, he turned and swiftly trotted away.

“Okay mister,” Spike said, turning to go back inside. Then he stopped. “Hey, wait, you didn’t tell me your name!”

“It’s Fine Print!” he yelled over his shoulder. “Leave a note at the Ponyville Inn if you need me! So long!”

Spike shrugged, watching the strange unicorn move away, and closed the door once again.

Fine Print only slowed once he was out of sight, back on the streets of Ponyville.

No guards, just a baby dragon, Princess? He smirked. You’re awfully relaxed. The automaton can’t be watched forever. This is going to be like taking candy from a foal.

***

Twilight and Gadget returned to the castle not long after their visit with Rarity. Twilight walked ahead of Gadget, head lowered, taking up the rear. Neither of them spoke a word as they made their way up the main hallway.

“Twilight, Gadget, you’re back!” Spike exclaimed, greeting them in the hall. “Um, Twilight? Some guy came by here…”

“Can it wait, Spike?” Twilight asked.

“Well, I guess, it was just some reporter who wanted to interview Turing Test.”

“A reporter?”

“Oh!” Gadget cried, rushing over to him excitedly. “Did he have a blue coat and and a black mane?”

“Hey, yeah, he did!”

“Oh my gosh, Fine Print came to visit!” she exclaimed. Then she paused and heaved a sigh. “Aw, and I missed him. I could have introduced you. And he’s probably disappointed that he didn’t get to talk to Turing.”

“Speaking of which,” Twilight said, “Spike, pardon me, but Gadget and I need to go talk in private.”

Spike balled his little claws into fists. “You know, Twilight, it’s okay if you two want to talk, but you don’t need to shut me out! I know something’s up and it involves Turing! I could at least try to help if you let me!”

“Spike, it’s not that… listen, I’m sorry, but it’s just complicated. I’m just not ready to talk to you about it now. Please.” She gave him a sympathetic look and his indignance drained out of him.

“Fine,” he said. “But when you’re ready to talk about it, I’d really like to know what’s going on.” Then suddenly his eyes bulged and his cheeks puffed out. With a belch of fire, a letter appeared. He quickly unfurled it. “Um, Twilight, it’s Princess Celestia. She just wants to know if you’re doing okay and if everything’s going okay with… well, you know.” He jerked his head back in the direction of Turing’s room. “Should we write her a reply?”

“I… not just yet. Give Gadget and I a little time. I’m sure Celestia won’t mind waiting a little.” She looked to see that Gadget was simply staring wide-eyed at Spike. “Gadget?”

“You can burp letters?” she asked in fascination. “Is that the only way you can receive them? Would it be possible to f--”

“Gadget!” Twilight shouted. “Not now!”

The two of them left Spike behind as they made their way to Twilight’s room. Only once inside, with the door shut, did they resume their conversation.

“Twilight, are you mad at me?”

Twilight sighed. “I just wanted to get away from my problem for a little while. I just wanted to unwind. Why did you ask Rarity that question?”

“I’m sorry. I was curious.” Gadget pawed the floor, looking down as she did so. “I didn’t mean to make you upset. But… maybe you needed to hear it.”

“Gadget, I said I don’t know what to do about Turing and this isn’t making it any easier.”

“Maybe it’s not supposed to be easy.”

Twilight rolled her eyes. “Believe me, I know a thing or two about friends being difficult. But Turing… what if she can’t feel affection at all? Or any emotion, for that matter!”

“That’s nonsense!” Gadget shouted with sudden ferocity. “Even putting aside her signs of self-awareness, how can you doubt that she really does have emotions after the way Rarity talked about her?”

“I’m… I don’t know. I just don’t know anymore.” Twilight gave a light flap of her wings to land on her bed and rest, putting her head down. “She seems so normal, even sweet, but then she can just be so cold.”

“I know you’re hurt, Twilight,” Gadget said, walking over to sit beside the bed. “But even with these doubts, I don’t think you’re giving her a fair chance.”

“She just shrugged off everything that everypony has done for her! How am I being unfair?”

“Because you’re treating her like a normal pony and she’s not! She’s a machine and she doesn’t function the same way you and I do! Darn it, you heard what Rarity said: she’s like a child. She’s just a baby, Twilight!”

Twilight opened her mouth to say something several times during Gadgets outburst, but ultimately she fell silent. Gadget waited several long moments for her to speak. Finally she muttered something, but it was too quiet to hear.

“S-sorry, what did you say, Twilight?”

“I said… I said that maybe I’m not ready to take care of her. Maybe you’re right that I’m not being fair and maybe it’s not her fault.” She swallowed. “I thought I could teach her to be friends, but she just won’t… she’s just… maybe she’s too different from normal ponies.”

Gadget reached out and put her hoof on Twilight’s shoulder. “Twilight. It’s okay to be scared. I’m scared too.”

“You seem to know more about machines than I do anyway… maybe I should… maybe I really should send Turing to stay with you for a while.”

Gadget gasped and for one moment she nearly cheered. Then she began to process what it meant, what taking care of Turing would really entail, and calmed herself. “That would be a huge honor and… and I admit that I’d be really interested in it. When we first activated her, I would have accepted the offer in a heartbeat. But if she comes to stay with me and Mr. Vanderbull, then she’d become a science experiment and nothing more. I like her, but alone, I can’t give her what she needs. With you and the others, I think she’s starting to develop a life of her own. So that’s… that’s why I don’t think I can accept.”

Twilight sighed. “Then I don’t really have any other choices. Nopony else will take her. Unless…”

Gadget raised an eyebrow. “Unless?”

“Unless I just give her away. I won’t just sell her, though; I gave my word. It’s either that or deactivate her until I can find somepony who can take care of her.”

Gadget hesitated, but forced herself to ask the remaining question: “What about Princess Celestia’s letter?”

Twilight swallowed. “I think I’ll need to report what’s happening with Turing. I’m not okay with lying to Celestia. She’s my mentor. She’s my friend.”

“Seriously? After what I told you, after what Rarity told you? Sure Princess Celestia’s your friend, but she’s a friend who thinks Turing might be dangerous and who would scrap her, given half the chance.” Gadget took on a bitter look then. “If you tell Celestia that Turing can’t make friends, then she’ll take that miraculous, childlike creature that came into our lives and destroy her!”

“I know that’s a possibility, and I didn’t say I would tell her all that! But like I said, I can’t just lie to her! I need time to think, but I can’t put off my response forever!”

“Just tell her you’re having some ups and downs!”

“Well right now I’m not sure if we’ll even have any more ‘ups!’”

“Twilight, if you tell Celestia that, Turing will die!”

“If you can say that she’s even ali--” Twilight stopped herself, but not quickly enough. Gadget gawked at her, raising her hooves over her mouth in horror. “I’m sorry. I… I didn’t mean that.”

Gadget took a deep breath and just nodded coldly. “I think I should go. I still want to help, but I’m not sure that I’ve done anything for you. Thank you for taking me to Rarity’s. I’ll… I’ll visit again tomorrow if you want.”

“Yes,” Twilight said quietly, her tone sincere despite her sadness. “I think that would be nice, Gadget. Until tomorrow. And good luck on your date.”

Gadget nodded and left the room. She made her way down the stairs and through the main hall, intending to exit the castle, but then noticed the little room where Turing stayed. She wondered if maybe she should leave things be, but she felt compelled to talk to her one last time before she left.

Ever so gently, she turned the doorknob and walked inside, closing the door behind her.

“Gadget?” Twilight called, poking her head around the corner. She’d wanted to make a suggestion about where to go on her date the next day, just to show there were no hard feelings, but she was only in time to see Gadget go into Turing’s room and lock the door.

She was about to turn back when her curiosity and concern took hold. She hesitated. Then, even against her better judgment, she let her wings carry her silently over to the door and set down, raising her ear to listen to the conversation going on inside.

***

“Hello again, Turing,” Gadget said, coming back alongside her. “What’s, um… what’s on your mind?”

“I desire eyelids.”

Suddenly aware of her own eyelids, Gadget blinked. “What?”

“Repeating: I stated my desire for eyelids.”

“Yes, but why?”

Turing looked at her and raised a hoof, pointing at her own glowing eyes. “I have determined that my lack of normal facial features is something of an impediment to normal interaction. While I may move my limbs and position my body similarly to an organic pony to engage in nonverbal communication, my face is noticeably different.”

Gadget nodded. “I see. And you think eyelids would help?”

“Correct. I am able to move my ears, of course.” She demonstrated, raising and lowering her ears, each one making the familiar squeaking sound as she did so. “I am also able to constrict the glow of my eyes. Like so.” The broad oval of her eyes shrank to smaller and smaller dots until finally becoming like pinpricks, looking almost like her pupils were dilating. “I am even able to temporarily disengage and reengage my ocular sensors, turning them off to simulate blinking. However, the occasional looks of what I have identified as surprise, anger, exasperation, and many other moods all require the use of eyelids. Also eyebrows. I am curious if such a modification could be added to my structure.”

“Well, I don’t know,” Gadget replied, thinking it over. “If you like, I could look over the schematics and notes I made while fixing you. Maybe it really is possible. At least the eyelids, although eyebrows are probably out of the question.”

“Thank you. Furthermore, I do not believe I expressed gratitude previously for assisting in my repairs. Thank you again.”

She smiled. “You’re welcome, Turing,” she replied quietly.

“And how is Twilight Sparkle? Is she well?”

The question didn’t really surprise her. Turing had shown concern for her master in their earlier conversation as well. “Twilight’s okay. She’s just confused. And she, well, is trying to decide what to do next.”

“What action would Twilight Sparkle need to take? This situation is the result of my own deficiencies. It is mine to remedy.”

Gadget swallowed. She didn’t answer immediately, mostly because she wasn’t sure how to explain the situation to Turing, or even if she should try.

(“...She might as well be a child…”)

Remembering Rarity’s words steadied her. She would talk to her as she would a child.

“Turing, you understand that Twilight is taking care of you and it’s not always easy, right?”

“Affirmative.”

“And… she’s not totally sure that she can give you the help you need. Do you understand?”

“Affirmative. She has some misgivings. I will allay them.”

“That’s… I mean, I’m glad you’re trying, but do you understand that, um… it might be possible that Twilight might need to… send you away?”

Turing Test did not reply to that. The sudden silence and even the total lack of movement from her was unsettling.

“That will not occur,” she said at last.

“You don’t think so?” Gadget asked.

“It is certain. I have just run the calculations. Twilight Sparkle will continue as my end user.”

“How do you know that?”

“As stated, I have run the calculations. The result indicates 0% probability that Twilight Sparkle will send me away.”

“But that’s…!” She struggled, unable to decide if she should be more harsh or simply let her continue under that assumption. “That’s not right, Turing.”

“It must be. I apologize, Gadget, but there is no possibility that--”

“Turing, yes there is!” she exclaimed. “I don’t think that Twilight will do that, or at least I hope not, but you have to at least consider the possibility!”

Turing was quiet again. This time, however, she twitched her head and ears slightly. “I will run diagnostics and calculate the odds again. Is there something else you wish to discuss?”

Gadget nodded. “Yes. I… Turing, what would you do if Twilight really did send you away?”

“As stated, I have no indication that--”

“Just hypothetically,” she said, quickly cutting off Turing’s objections. “I mean… what if…” She took a deep breath, steeling herself. “What if she couldn’t help you anymore? What if nopony could? What if… what if the only choice was to deactivate you permanently or even… even dismantle you?”

“You wish to know my response to such a situation?”

Gadget nodded.

“No response would be required. If that is what Twilight Sparkle decides, then that is what will occur.”

Gadget gawked at her. “That’s it? You wouldn’t argue, object, or protest? You wouldn’t fight to defend yourself?!”

“Though I am to protect my existence, this need is superseded by my need to follow orders. I desire to please Twilight Sparkle by making friends. If I am unable to do so--”

“But what about what pleases you?! What about what you want?!” She seized Turing by her rounded shoulders with her mechanical hands, practically shaking her. “That should count for something, don’t you think?”

Turing cocked her head to the side. “Negative. Why would such a thing matter? I am merely a machine. As an example,” she held up a hoof, turning it upwards demonstratively (a gesture that did not go unnoticed), “consider a cart. Applejack had such a cart to haul apples yesterday. Many other ponies have such a device. Nopony considers the wants or desires of the cart. The cart exists to fulfill a purpose. If it fails, it is repaired or discarded or scrapped, its materials put to some other use. I am no different: I am here to serve a purpose. If Twilight Sparkle has no need of me, if I am no longer able to serve that purpose, then she may dispose of me.”

“But you’re not just some wooden thing on wheels for hauling apples, Turing! You have feelings!”

“Perhaps. There seems to be some question of that from others, and I lack experience to assert otherwise with certainty. While my prior experiences are significant to me, they are not relevant. If Twilight Sparkle wishes me to be destroyed, then that is what will happen. I will not displease her by defying those wishes.”

She turned. Gadget had tears streaming down her face.

“Gadget, you are crying. Are you in pain or distress?”

Gadget couldn’t speak. She only nodded, wiping her eyes on her sleeves.

“You show this concern for me. It is curious that you and others show such affection for me when I am unable to return it.”

There was the sudden clatter of hooves outside the door and a soft cry as somepony galloped away from the door. Gadget ran to the door and saw Twilight running away, up the hall and around the corner, out of sight.

“Twilight…?”

“She was at the door for the majority of our interaction. Were you unaware of this? I am uncertain of the auditory range of organic ponies.”

Gadget shook her head. “I had no idea she was listening in.”

“She is likely distressed, similarly to yourself. I am unable to determine why. Perhaps I will be able to determine the solution upon further analysis. Do you have anything else to discuss?”

“Not right now, Turing,” Gadget replied quietly. “I… I should go. It’s getting late.”

“Understood. Will I see you tomorrow?”

Gadget went through the door and began to close it behind her. “I sure hope so.”

To be continued...

In Two Minds, Part 3

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Fine Print was scribbling more notes down after developing the day’s pictures in the bathroom. It was late and nearly time for bed for most ponies. For him, he would not sleep until he was certain the last light in the castle was out.

He was jolted out of these thoughts by a knock on the door. At first he thought it might have been the hotel manager or the maid or the bellhop, so he called out, “I’m busy, please come back later.”

“Oh, I-I’m sorry.” His ears perked up when he recognized the voice.

He rushed over and opened the door a crack, enough to stick his head out but without her being able to look inside. “Gadget! I’m sorry, I thought you were one of the hotel staff!”

The young mare was in the hallway and had turned from the door, but she wheeled back around excitedly. “Fine Print! I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to bother you.”

“No, no, it’s nothing, I have a little time. I…” It was then that he noticed her eyes. “Gadget? Are you okay? Your eyes are red! Have you been crying?”

She turned away. “No. I mean, just a little. S-sorry, it’s nothing important. Please don’t worry.”

“Are you sure? I mean, if you’d like to talk about it…”

She managed a weak smile and said, “No, thank you. Please don’t worry about it; I didn’t come here to bother you. I just came by to ask where you wanted to meet for lunch.”

“Oh. Um, well, if you say so.” He considered the question a moment. “Well, there’s a nice cafe near the Quills and Sofa store. It’s called Dazy Daisy. Would you like to go there?”

She raised an eyebrow. “Dazy Daisy?”

“Please, give me your answer. Do you have another place in mind?”

“No, no, it’s just a funny name.” She looked up at him and smiled warmly. “I love you.”

“Wh-what?!” he stammered, eyes going wide.

She raised an eyebrow. “I said, ‘I’d love to.’ What did you think I said?”

“Oh, that’s… n-nevermind.” He swallowed. “Sorry, I guess I’ve been working too hard. I’m half crazy right now.” His face turned red and his cheeks burned. “Noon, then?”

She noticed his blush and practically melted into her hooves. “Yes, noon! Well, I’m, um, looking forward to our da--lunch! I’m lunch! Looking forward to it! The lunch!”

“Yep, yep, sounds good! Tomorrow then!”

She nodded and scrambled back to her room and he quickly shut his own door. He then slumped to the floor, burying his face in his own hooves in embarrassment. “Argh, what is wrong with me!” he groaned. He took a deep breath and slowly his pulse returned to normal.

But then a thought occurred to him: She knows Twilight and therefore knows the automaton. She could get me in. She could get me closer! He nodded to himself and he smiled excitedly.

Then the image of her smiling up at him as she played with her mane nervously made him stop.

No. She’s a sweet girl. I don’t need to resort to that…

He yawned and moved to his desk to finish his work. Tomorrow. I’ll consider it tomorrow. I have to concentrate now. I’ll get some rest and then… well, we’ll just see…

***

Twilight’s eyes popped open and she sat up in bed, her heart thundering and her body drenched with sweat. Panting and shivering, she let her eyes dart around the room. She saw the white gleam of the moon and the glittering of the stars through her window. The memory of the horror she’d witnessed began to fade.

She touched her neck, barely conscious of the gesture. Then she realized what she’d done and shuddered.

She got out of bed and quietly made her way downstairs to the kitchen. She considered making some chamomile to calm her nerves.

The faint glint of violet out of the corner of her eye made her jump as she neared the door.

Her horn glowed with magic as she reared back, ready to defend herself. But then she saw that the violet she’d seen was only the muddled reflection of her own body in the castle’s crystalline wall.

“Eyes…” she muttered to herself. She blinked several times. In the castle, the shadows ran deep and every tiny nocturnal sound echoed weirdly in the sepulchral halls and archways.

She opened her wings and flew down the hallway to the entrance. She tensed up as she passed a door. She saw the dim purple glow shining behind it and realized that its sole occupant was still in there.

She hurried out the door and circled around to land nearby the shore of the lake behind the castle.

Slowly, as the sounds of crickets and frogs filled the air, she caught her breath.

“I’m safe,” she breathed. “It wasn’t real…”

Then she heard light hoofsteps and whirled around to see another figure coming through the mist.

“Who’s there?!” she demanded.

The pony slowed her pace and peered at her in the darkness. “Twilight? It’s me, Gadget.”

Twilight saw that it was indeed her. The girl stepped forward gingerly.

“I… I couldn’t sleep. I just went out for a walk and came by the castle when I saw you.”

Twilight nodded but her gaze was unfocused and she wobbled as she sat. “Right. Okay.”

Gadget shivered. “It’s freezing out. My glasses fogged up when I came outside.” She waited for Twilight to say something, but there was no response. Finally she leaned forward and asked “Um… can I sit with you?”

Twilight blinked. “Yes? I mean… yes. Sorry, I just… I’m not sure I’m quite awake.” She sat down on the shore of the lake and patted the ground next to her. Gadget came closer and sat down beside Twilight.

The two stared out at the lake, its still, glassy surface reflecting the bright full moon overhead.

“It’s beautiful,” Twilight said. “Don’t you think?”

Gadget nodded.

They continued staring out at the lake, neither one saying anything as they watched the moon gradually drop lower and lower.

“I couldn’t sleep either,” Twilight said.

Gadget gave a mirthless chuckle. “Yeah. It’s not really surprising, is it?”

Twilight lowered her head. “I guess not.” And then she said, “Turing attacked me.”

“What?!” Gadget cried, her voice echoing out over the lake.

“In my dream!” Twilight exclaimed. “It was… I remembered what Applejack told me. I had a dream that Turing Test was with me. I turned around for a second and then she… she…”

Gadget made a face. “Turing would never hurt you, Twilight.”

“Part of me knows that, but I just can’t shake that feeling. I just don’t know.”

The two settled back into silence.

“I had a dream too,” Gadget said quietly. “In mine, I saw her… I saw some ponies take her and they… they threw her into a vat of molten metal. They just… they just melted her down like she was junk and she didn’t even make a s-sound--”

“Gadget?” Twilight turned and saw that the younger mare was weeping. The tears came in little rivulets and streaked down her cheeks and she hadn’t even bothered to remove her glasses as they came.

“Oh. Oh Gadget, oh no, please don’t cry.” She went to her and gently put her arm around her. “I’m sorry I just… I know this is hard for you...”

“Yes, but,” Gadget said between sniffles, “I know that this isn’t easy for you either. I know you care, I believe you when you say that. But Turing is… I j-just don’t want,” she swallowed, “I don’t want anything to happen to her.”

Twilight nodded. “I know. I don’t either. I still don’t know what to say to Celestia’s letter, but I honestly don’t think I could let anything happen to Turing.”

“But yesterday, you said--”

“I know, I know!” she exclaimed, looking on the verge of tears herself as she sucked in a deep breath. “But honestly I don’t know what I should do! I can’t just ignore what Turing said to me and I have to accept that maybe Applejack is right… and I’ve never said no to Princess Celestia before either, so if she demanded that I give Turing over to her, then… I j-just don’t know what to do.” She sagged, the fight draining out of her.

“Twilight, I--”

“I’m failing her,” Twilight said.

“What? Who, Celestia?”

“No, not Celestia. Turing.” She shut her eyes tightly, hating the truth of what she was saying. “I’m failing Turing. I’m the one who said I’d teach Turing Test to make friends and now I don’t know what to do that would be best for her. I can’t stand the idea of her being harmed but I can’t get over my doubts and I can’t disobey Celestia and I just can’t do this anymore!” she exploded.

Gadget shot to her hooves. “Yes you can!” she cried. “You’re one of the most courageous ponies in Equestria and right now Turing Test needs you! Please, Twilight, don’t give up on her now!”

Twilight blinked. She remembered Turing making a similar request not so long ago and the earnestness of that request gave her strength. Just like that, the doubt that gnawed at her diminished.

“You’re right,” she said to Gadget. “I can do this. I can’t just give up now. I know there has to be an answer; I just have to find it.”

Gadget smiled. “You mean--”

“I just mean I need to face this problem head on instead of avoiding it. But I’m going to need an expert’s help.” She pointed at Gadget. “Nopony I know is a greater expert on machines than you! Maybe we each need to think about this problem from a different angle, and then we can figure out what would really be best for Turing. What do you say?”

Gadget stood up straight. “I say ‘I’m at your service, Your Highness!’”

***

“Spike?”

In his room, Spike was rubbing his eyes after a somewhat fitful night’s sleep. He sat up and went to the door, opening it to see Twilight standing there.

“Spike, I’m glad you’re awake.”

The little dragon yawned. “Barely. What’s up, Twilight?”

Without warning, she drew him in close, hugging him. “First and foremost, I need to apologize. I’ll explain everything to you. But after a quick breakfast, I’ll need your help. I’ll need to look through the library and find every book I can on psychology. Theory and practice!”

Spike wasn’t sure what was going on, but he smiled anyway. “Sure, of course. And you promise to tell me everything that’s going on with you and Turing Test?”

“Yes. I promise.” She nuzzled him. “I’m going to figure this out with you and Gadget’s help!”

***

Gadget ran down the street and finally spotted what she was looking for. The sign over the door said “Ponyville Lending Library.”

“Perfect!” she exclaimed, and walked in the door. “Hello?” she called loudly.

“Shh, this is a library!” hissed the librarian - a surprisingly young-looking earth pony mare with a red coat and a long, light-brown mane - as she trotted out from behind a bookshelf. “You don’t want to text my patience.”

“Oh, right,” Gadget whispered, walking over to her. “Do you have a science section?”

“We sure do. I just reshelved some books on the elements. The authors bring a lot to the table, periodically.”

“That’s great,” she said excitedly, “but I’m looking for something by Dr. Talon Turing.”

“Oh, the computer scientist! Of course! I hear he’s on good terms with other scientists, even if he’s not a pony. I guess science involves a lot of griffon take.”

“Great, I need to see something by him!”

“I’ll show you. The decimal system can be complex, but most libraries recommend using it. And Dewey ever!”

Gadget saw her looking at her expectantly, though she had no idea why. “Um, okay. Yes, let’s see them.”

“It’s on a high shelf,” the librarian said with a sigh, turning back to grin at her as she led her. “With your mechanical limbs, you should be able to reach it without stretching too far, though. It’s a good thing too; I’d hate to see you do arm to yourself.”

Gadget was barely listening. Okay, there has to be something in here, something scientific that will convince Twilight that the situation with Turing Test is not hopeless! With some luck, maybe her namesake can help me save her!

***

Fine Print stared at his reflection in the bathroom mirror. His hair was neat, he had on a nice shirt and tie, and a new pair of dress slacks. He checked his teeth. Overall, in his estimation, he looked pretty good. Definitely nice enough for a lunch date.

“Not bad, not bad,” he said.

And yet he still felt like the worst pony to walk the earth.

She’s sweet. She’s nice. She’s smart. And goodness knows why, she likes you back. And you’re going to take advantage of her?

He closed his eyes, trying not to think about it.

It’s not selfishness, he told himself. This is for a reason. This is for the future.

He turned, pocketing his notebook and picking up the carnation he’d bought from the local florist. Taking a breath, he exited his room and headed off to his lunch date. He had plenty of time, but he wasn’t about to be late.

***

“No, this is no good either!”

Twilight pored over another book on the subject. Psychology could be fascinating, but somehow she felt like she was missing something. Talking about the minds of ponies was difficult, but finding something that applied to robot ponies was something that had never been done. She tried to find something related to child psychology - taking Rarity and Gadget’s opinion that Turing was herself like a child into consideration - and Spike had managed to find one or two books that mentioned the subject, though it wasn’t very much.

“Any luck, Twilight?” Spike asked.

“Not really,” she replied. She snapped the book shut. “All of this talks about coping with emotions or lack of maturity and neither one applies exactly to Turing. She’s just… ugh, I wish there was somepony else to talk to about this!”

Spike blinked. “Um, Twilight… there is. There’s Rarity or Rainbow Dash, for example.”

She shook her head. “I feel bad about burdening you, Spike. I don’t want to make things worse by dragging more of my friends into this problem.”

“You don’t have to tell them everything if you don’t want to. But they’re your friends and Turing’s friends too. Maybe one of them has thought of something you haven’t?”

She paused a moment, then smiled. “Maybe you’re right. Just because I’ve spent the most time with Turing doesn’t mean I know everything about her.” She stood up, grinning broadly. “Rainbow Dash! I haven’t talked to her about this yet!”

Running out as fast as she could, she made her way to the balcony, Spike following behind.

“Spike, I’ll be back later! I need to find Rainbow Dash!” she shouted and took off to find her pegasus friend.

“Good luck!” he called after her. After a few moments, he sighed and went back to his duties. Twilight had told him to send a response to Princess Celestia saying how she was occupied with other things and that she’d reply when she had a free moment, and he’d done so, but that would only buy them a little extra time until they had to send a proper response.

What weighed more heavily on his mind, though, was what Twilight had told him about Turing.

What does that mean? he asked himself. Twilight says she can’t feel affection, but that’s… that can’t be right! I was really starting to like her. And she can’t like anypony back? I don’t get it…

He was just an assistant. Just Twilight’s helper. Just a baby dragon. Maybe he didn’t understand everything, but what he did understand was that he liked Turing Test even if she didn’t - or couldn’t - feel the same way, and he’d felt bad about leaving her in that room alone.

He drew himself up and marched out of the library, down the stairs, into the hall, and right to her room. He knocked on the door.

“You may enter, Spike the Dragon,” came Turing’s distinctive electronic voice.

Spike entered. “How did you know it was me?”

“I heard the sound of your feet. Every individual pony has a distinctive sound as their hooves hit the ground. Naturally, your claws also have their own unique sound.”

She was just sitting there, staring into the mirror. She’d been in this tiny room for almost 24 hours. He couldn’t help but feel a little sorry for her.

“Your expression, Spike the Dragon; are you perhaps upset?”

“No. I’m just… I guess I’m a little sad.” He came over and laid his claw on her shoulder. “Are you okay?”

“I am functioning…” She stopped. “You refer to my mental state, rather than my physical state. Am I correct?”

“Uh, yeah, I think so.”

“I am still trying to correct my motions and nonverbal communications to perfectly mimic those of organic ponies. The results are improving, though imperfect. Has Miss Gadget returned to the castle? And if so, did she mention eyelids?”

Spike shook his head. “No, Gadget hasn’t… wait, eyelids?”

“I am attempting further emulation. However, the results are imperfect. Likewise, no emotional response has accompanied these exercises. It seems I have failed. I have failed again.”

He sighed, but put on a smile in spite of himself. “Um, listen, Turing, I just wanted to tell you that Twilight is really trying to help you. We spent all morning working on it.”

She didn’t respond, but her ears perked up.

“I’ve known Twilight a long time and she gets like this sometimes. She just… you know, overthinks the situation and gets all worked up.”

“I do not understand what you mean by ‘overthink.’ Can organic ponies injure themselves through extensive analysis?”

“No, I mean… well, it’s more like she gets an idea in her head and can’t make a decision. She just gets a little crazy when she can’t find an answer!”

“You believe Twilight Sparkle has entered an infinite loop?”

“Sssure? I guess that’s the robot term for it.” He shrugged.

“Then she will continue in that manner until she reaches a terminal condition.”

“If you mean until she finds an answer, then yeah. And I just know she’ll come up with something!”

Spike waited for her to respond, but Turing said nothing.

“So, yeah… just, um, do what you like until Twilight gets back, I guess.” He turned to go. “And maybe you should get up and move your legs before you rust or something,” he added jokingly. “I mean, you’ve been cooped up in here for a while.”

Turing raised her head just as Spike left the room.

Analyzing previous command by Twilight Sparkle: This unit inquired how long to stay in domicile. Response was: “I don’t know! For a while!” Spike the Dragon indicated that it has been “a while.” Ergo, exiting the room is now permitted.

She stood and walked out of the room. Spike had already gone back to the library, which meant nopony was around to see her walk out the door and toward Ponyville.

Integration must be achieved. Further input required. Beginning observation and emulation of organics. New objective set: attempt to incite feelings of affection.

***

Fine Print sat at a table, a glass of water in front of him. He didn’t have a watch, but the waiter had told him it was nearly noon a short time ago. He adjusted his tie, trying to stay calm. Then he heard the rhythmic thump of hooves galloping toward him and smiled as he saw Gadget galloping over to him.

“Gadget!” he exclaimed. Then he gaped at her, utterly awestruck at the outfit she was wearing. “I… wow, you look…” He grinned broadly. “You look fantastic.”

“Th-thanks. That’s sweet.” She was wearing the dress Rarity had chosen for her as well as the Point Dexter. She used a mechanical hand to twirl part of her mane nervously.

She went for her seat and Fine Print quickly moved over to pull it out for her. “Allow me,” he said.

Oh gosh, treating me this way… I need to stay calm or I’m going to lose it! She smiled and took her seat, nodding politely as he returned to his own seat.

He took out a small plastic box with a carnation inside. “I got this for you,” he said.

“Oh, you shouldn’t have!” she cooed. It was a small, but beautiful pink carnation and she took it out and inspected it carefully. “It’s lovely.”

She then stuffed it in her mouth.

“It’ch pretty tashty too!” she managed to say while munching on the flower. “Hope it doeshn’t shpoil mah appetite!”

He did his best to keep his smile. Oh well, glad she liked the corsage. Though, not in the way I intended.

“So, um… they’ve got some excellent salads,” he said. “Some squash, potatoes, as well as their selection of flowers.”

She picked up the menu. “Hm, tulips? Those are little out of season, though…”

Soon they’d made their orders and, after some awkward moments, they became more comfortable and started chatting more readily. They talked about how Gadget had created the Point Dexter and why as well as the sort of things she was interested in. Then they moved on to talking about their jobs. Fine Print was hesitant and didn’t seem to want to talk much about his work, but Gadget rattled off story after story from her own career.

“...So Mr. Vanderbull went up to Rockefoaler,” she said, trying to keep herself from cracking up, “and h-he says pffthahah, no, wait wait, let me finish…”

Fine Print was still laughing from her previous story and was having a hard time keeping quiet through this one. “It’s okay, take all the time--” he gasped for air, “take all the time you need!”

“He says to Rockefoaler,” here she drew herself up, badly imitating Vanderbull’s deep, masculine voice, “‘You robber baron! If I let you have your way, I’d end up putting the passengers on the cargo trains and personally tucking in your oil barrels on the sleeper car!’”

“HAHAHA! Oh, you’re kidding!”

“I swear, he said that! I thought I was going to choke to death from trying so hard not to laugh!”

“Wow, Rockefoaler must have been furious!”

She continued giggling as she tried to take a sip of her lemonade. “He was, he really was! He just about stormed out of the meeting right there. Mr. Vanderbull didn’t budge and finally they just ended up with the same contract as before. All that talk for nothing.”

She took a deep breath. “Oh wow… I’m sorry, I keep telling these stories, but… well, I haven’t heard anything from you yet. At least nothing much.”

He looked away. “Ah. Well, you know, there’s not much to tell.”

“Aw, come on!” she said, leaning over the table. “Tell me, tell me! You’re a reporter, there must have been some interesting things you’ve seen, some interesting ponies you’ve met!”

“Sure, I… I’ve been published here and there. I have to admit, I’m not that well known.”

“Well, where have you been published?”

“Um,” he looked away, apparently deep in thought. “Once or twice for the Hoofington Press. A short article on Mustangia for a travel magazine. Uh… this article on loggers in The Vanhooverian--”

“The Vanhooverian?!” she exclaimed. “I’m actually from Vanhoover! I haven’t been back since Hearth’s Warming Eve, but I remember seeing it all over!”

“Oh! W-well, it was just--”

“When was it published?”

“Three months ago,” he replied. He grinned nervously. “It was honestly a pretty lousy article. Not worth reading.”

“I bet it’s better than you give yourself credit for,” she said.

He shook his head. “Never mind that. Let’s change the subject.” He hesitated for a moment, but then pressed forward. “You said you’re friends with Twilight Sparkle, right?”

“Princess Twilight?”

She did not notice the momentary flicker of his smile. “Yes.”

“Well, yes, I suppose I am. I never dreamed I’d be friends with somepony like her, but--”

“And she’s keeping that automaton, right?”

“Yes.” Then she remembered. “Oh, that’s right, Spike mentioned that you came by the castle! Were you, um, there because you thought I might be there?”

He blinked. “Yes, I was!”

Liar, he told himself. Go ahead. Lie some more.

“I’d really like an interview with the automaton. Turing Test, right?”

“Yes, it is, but,” she hesitated. “I’m sorry, but it’s not my place to give permission. That’s Twilight Sparkle’s decision. I can ask her for you, of course.”

He looked crestfallen. “Oh. I suppose… if that’s how it goes.”

“No, no, I’ll ask, I promise!” she insisted. “I think you’d be perfect to interview her, honestly. You seem to know a lot about technology.”

He nodded, puffing out his chest. “I suppose I do.”

“Then maybe you could talk to her and really understand her as a pony, and not just some sideshow curiosity. She’s so intelligent, and she’s got such a good heart--”

“A heart?” he asked, raising an eyebrow. “This is a machine we’re talking about, right?”

“Yes,” she sighed, rolling her eyes, “but she’s not an ordinary machine. She has thoughts, she has ideas, and she even has feelings.”

“Feelings?!” he exclaimed.

She looked at him, surprised at the outburst. “Yes. She isn’t easy to read and a lot of the things she says are cold, hard logic. But she… yes, she has feelings.”

He shook his head. “No. That’s not possible. She can’t have feelings. Machines can only do what somepony programs them to do.”

She crossed her forelegs, picking up her lemonade with one of her mechanical hands, sipping from it while maintaining her look of disapproval. “No offense, but that’s where you’re wrong. Have you ever read Dr. Talon Turing’s work on artificial intelligence?”

“Of course I have!” He paused. “I mean, a little. For research on articles,” he added, his eyes trailing off to the left.

Gadget was barely listening and continued on excitedly. “He has this theory about something called ‘emergent properties.’ He thinks that machines and artificial intelligence will become more like living creatures as they get more and more complex.”

“I remember that,” he breathed, his eyes growing wider. He sat straight up. “The idea is that a system complex enough to resemble the brain would have intelligence and… emotions. It would just have emotions as a natural result.” He began to rub his chin, his mind racing.

“Exactly!” she cried excitedly, slamming both hooves on the table, startling him out of his thoughts.

“Oh, but… I mean, that’s just a hypothesis. Nopony’s ever proven it.”

“That’s because nopony’s ever built an artificial mind complex enough to test that hypothesis. Until now, that is,” Gadget said, practically shaking with excitement.

“You think… you think that’s what this is?” he asked hesitantly.

“Exactly,” Gadget replied. “It isn’t my usual expertise, but I think… no, I know that’s what’s going on with Turing Test.” She smiled. “She’s obviously intelligent, capable of so much, and she responds to her environment in logical, systematic ways. Even when it comes to talking to other ponies, she has a kind of reasoning, even though it’s a little naive. But the point is that anything that makes her think so much like us might mean she is like us. Even if she’s not organic, she’s too complex to just be pre-programmed responses.”

Fine Print was silent, dumbstruck at what Gadget had just said. “But that’s… not actually possible,” he whispered.

“It is!” she said, nodding emphatically. “I can’t promise an interview, but if it happens, please talk to her about it. You’ll see!”

She looked up and saw that the waiter was bringing them both their lunch.

He sighed, but smiled, his normal composure returning. “Looks good,” he said as the plate was set before him.

“Thanks, you do too,” Gadget replied. Then her eyes went wide. “Oh, th-the food! Yes. Delicious.” She blushed and he did as well.

Then the two of them burst out laughing at the silliness of the moment.

“Hey, um… you live in Manehattan, right?” Fine Print asked.

“Yes, unless my work takes me elsewhere.”

“I travel around sometimes, but, ah… I could pay you a visit. I mean, next time I’m there. If you want, of course.”

She drew in a breath, looking so happy that she might simply burst. “Y-yes. I’d like that very much.”

The two of them settled back into idle chit-chat as they continued their lunch.

***

“I’m sorry, you want to know what now?” Rainbow Dash raised an eyebrow as she looked up from the day’s weather schedule in her hooves.

“I said I wanted to know if Turing and you were really friends,” Twilight asked. The two of them were seated on a small cloud. Twilight had found her there going over the schedule as she prepared to divvy out responsibilities to the weather team.

Rainbow laughed, shaking her head. “Seriously? Did you come to gloat or something? Yeah, I told you when we got back. Maybe I didn’t think much about her at first, but she’s actually pretty cool. You were right, okay? She can make friends and I’m one of ‘em.” She glanced back at the weather schedule, raising an eyebrow at some detail of it. “Anything else?”

“No, it’s more than that!” Twilight insisted. “I mean… like… you think of her as a friend, but what if she didn’t think of you the same way?”

“The same way? What are you talking about?” Then her eyes went wide and she lifted her head. “Wait. You’re… not developing a crush on her or anything are you? I’m pretty sure there are laws, or at least there should be.”

“What? No!” Twilight shouted indignantly.

Rainbow Dash started laughing. “Well, that’s a relief! Fine, spit it out already! I’ve got a weather team to coordinate--”

Twilight placed her hoof on the weather schedule, forcing Rainbow to look her in the eye.

“Oh. You’re serious about this, aren’t you?”

Twilight nodded.

Dash folded the schedule closed and sat down. “I’m all ears. What’s wrong, Twilight?”

“I mean, well… what if two ponies say they’re friends, but one doesn’t consider them as close as another. Isn’t that a problem?”

“No.”

Twilight blinked at the quick reply. Dash was just looking back at her. There was no sarcastic grin and there were no raised eyebrows this time. “No?” Twilight echoed. “That’s it? Just ‘no?’”

“Well, I mean, it stinks if one pony doesn’t care as much as another one does. But if they still care, then so what? They both say they’re friends, so what if they aren’t exactly the same?”

“Seriously? That wouldn’t bother you?”

“Heh. Come on, Twilight, I have plenty of friends, and I don’t think of them all exactly the same. Like, uh…” she paused, scratching her head. “Okay, take Fluttershy for instance: she’s been my friend since I was a filly. And then there’s you: I met you just over a year ago. You’re both my friends, but it’s not like you’re exactly the same type of friend.

“Fluttershy and me go way back ever since I used to protect her from bullies at flight school. She knows me and I know her because we’ve got a lot of history. With you, I don’t have that, but so what? Instead, I feel like I get to learn cool stuff and talk about Daring Do and I get psyched when we get to go on adventures!"

Twilight stared at her. “So… what about Turing?”

“Tee’s cool. She--”

“Wait, ‘Tee?’”

Rainbow Dash shrugged. “I thought it sounded cooler,” she muttered, her cheeks reddening. “Anyway, she bugged me at first, but I feel like we understand each other, at least a little. She’s tough and determined, just like me! But she respects me, too. She makes me feel like I’m helping her become a better pony. She pretty much told me that.”

“I remember, but… you’re saying it wouldn’t bother you if Turing couldn’t like you the same way as a normal pony?”

Rainbow Dash sighed and placed a hoof on Twilight’s shoulder, patting her gently. “Oh Twilight, Twilight, Twilight.”

Twilight wrinkled up her nose. “I’m not a foal, Rainbow Dash. Please don’t talk to me like one.”

“Then think about it, Twi. It’s like I said, everypony’s different anyway. Tee’s a robot! You knew that from the beginning. It’s not like she was ever going to be cute and snuggly in the first place. What the hay did you expect?

“I mean, what’s the deal; you were the first of us to say that Tee could be friends. I didn’t believe it at first, but Tee proved you right.”

Twilight looked down, unable to face her. “I… well, I guess I--”

“Tee might not be normal, Twilight, but who the hay is? It isn’t worth worrying about. Besides it’s pretty obvious she thinks of you as a friend in her own weird way, so quit worrying about it. If you really like somepony and if they’re your friend too, does it matter if it’s the exact same type of feeling?”

Twilight’s eyes lit up.

“Jeez, I guess that sounds pretty sappy,” Rainbow chuckled, rubbing the back of her head as she did so. “Well, anyway, does that help, Twilight?”

Twilight leaped across the cloud to embrace her. “Yes! Yes, Rainbow, you’re a genius! Of course! Oh my gosh, I’ve been such a dummy!”

“Whoa, whoa, okay, easy there, Twi,” she said, prying herself loose. “Look, I need to get back to work. Is there anything else you need?”

“You’ve already helped me more than enough!” Twilight exclaimed, and took off from the cloud, heading back toward her castle.

“Yeah, okay, fly safe!” she called after her. Muttering to herself, she added, “I wonder what that was all about?”

***

Fine Print trotted down the road as he made his way back toward the hotel. He was light on his feet, practically dancing.

She’s so great. That lunch was the most fun I’ve had in years. And I can’t believe she agreed to meet me for tea and pie later!

He felt a tingle go down his spine and found it impossible to suppress the dopey grin on his face even when he noticed all the odd looks passersby were giving him.

I’m going to kiss her tonight, he told himself, raising his head confidently. I don’t care if everypony in the shop stares at us! I’m going to--

An electric, mechanical sound drew him out of that thought. He slowed his pace and turned down a nearby alley, following that all-too-familiar noise. What he saw nearly made his heart stop.

Turing Test was just standing there, right in the middle of the road. She was only 10 meters away. And she was totally alone.

He swallowed and approached her carefully, expecting the Princess to arrive out of nowhere any minute. But nothing happened. Turing was looking around, though he had no idea what for, but otherwise she seemed to be simply wandering.

“Um, excuse me?” Fine Print asked.

She turned to him. “Hello. May I hug you?”

He blinked. “Um… I’m sorry, did you ask me for… a hug?”

“Affirmative. I am attempting to initiate feelings of affection. Available data indicates that such feelings often appear to coincide with physical embraces. All offers of such an embrace have been denied, so I have yet to determine its efficacy.”

He gawked at her. “You mean you’re just going around asking random ponies for hugs?”

“Correct.” She sat and held her forelegs open invitingly. “Shall I proceed?”

“Um, no thank you,” he replied, looking at her uncertainly. “I’m good on hugs.”

“Understood.” She put her forelegs down and stood again. “I will continue to seek a willing participant.” She started to walk away.

“Wait, wait, I wanted to talk to you!” he exclaimed. “I know who you are! You’re Turing Test, the automaton staying with Princess Twilight!”

“Incorrect,” she said. “I am Turing Test, the robot that is staying with Princess Twilight.”

“Haha, yes, well,” he began, shrugging off his slight annoyance at being corrected, “I was wondering, what are you doing out here, exactly? Besides the hugging.”

“In addition to my aforementioned attempts at hugging, I am currently engaged in observation of organic ponies. I am attempting to analyze their movements and incorporate a variety of nonverbal gestures and behaviors into my own database. By perfecting such actions, I may learn to integrate better and more effectively make friends.”

“I… that’s nice,” he said, not really knowing what else to say. “Listen, my name is Fine Print: I’m a reporter. I write stories about all sorts of interesting ponies. And you might be one of the most interesting ones I’ve ever met. Would it be all right if I interviewed you?”

“Analyzing request… more information required.” She came nearer. “Would publishing my story please Twilight Sparkle?”

“Sure it would!” he said eagerly.

“In what way?”

“Oh, um…” He hadn’t expected that. He shut his eyes, tapping his foot as he improvised. “Ah! If your story were to be published across Equestria, more ponies would learn about you and be less afraid of you! And then even more of them would be your friend! In fact, if you follow me, maybe you and I could become friends too.” He leaned forward, offering her a smile. “And making a friend would make Twilight Sparkle happy, wouldn’t it?”

Turing nodded. “That is sound logic. You may ask me your questions, Fine Print.”

“Actually,” he said, “I think I know a better place to conduct a private interview where nopony will interrupt us. Follow me, please.”

He began to lead Turing Test back down the alley, away from prying eyes.

***

Twilight returned to the castle and went directly to Turing Test’s room.

“Turing, listen, I have--”

She stopped. The door was open. Turing wasn’t inside. She frowned and looked around.

“Spike?” she called.

“Coming, Twilight!” Spike replied, running over as soon as he heard her voice. “What’s going on?” Then he saw the door as well. “Huh? Where’s Turing?”

Twilight stiffened, her eyes widening. “That’s what I was going to ask! You mean you don’t know either?”

“No! I just talked to her earlier! I didn’t tell her to move or anything!”

“Okay, okay, it’s probably fine,” she said, trying to remain calm. “Look, let’s just check the castle, she must be around here somewhere!”

Spike nodded dutifully and they began searching the rooms. Spike went on foot while Twilight rapidly teleported from one room to another, searching systematically. After a few minutes, they both met back in the hall.

“I can’t find her anywhere!” Spike exclaimed, throwing his hands up.

“Neither can I! Oh no… She must have left the castle by herself!” Narrowing her eyes in determination, she ran at the door. “Spike, stay here in case she comes back. If she does, tell her I said to stay put! I’m going out to search for her!”

Spike watched her go, waving to her as she took to the air. “Good luck, Twilight!” he called after her.

Twilight rose above the village and began scanning the ground for any signs of the missing robot. Turing, what are you doing? If anything happens to you now…

She put it out of mind, shaking her head and refocusing her attention on the ground below. She had a robot to find.

***

Gadget was making her way back to Twilight’s castle after finishing her lunch with Fine Print. She wore a dreamy smile on her face, with her mechanical limbs moving in time to the romantic music that played in her head. She didn’t even notice the spectacle she was making of herself as bystanders stopped and stared.

I’m going to kiss him tonight, she told herself. Oh my gosh, I’m going to get my first kiss tonight! He’s so sweet, and so cool, oh wow, oh jeez, I need to calm down!

She took a deep breath and noticed that she was near the outdoor market. Among the many stalls, one was selling newspapers and magazines from around Equestria.

She paused. I should really go over to see Twilight. This is important. She started to turn away. Although, her inner voice told her, I only told her that I’d come by “after lunch.” It’s not a firm appointment and this will only take a minute. I’ll go check!

She trotted over to the stall and smiled at the vendor.

“Excuse me, sir, but do you carry back issues of any of your magazines?”

He eyed her mechanical limbs, regarding them with curiosity, but then shrugged. A customer was a customer. “I’ve got a few. What are you looking for, sweetie?”

“I’m looking for an issue of The Vanhooverian.”

“Yeah, I think I have one or two older issues. Any particular one?”

She grinned. “I’m looking for one from three months ago.”

“Oh, sorry about that, missy,” he said with a frown. “I guess you didn’t hear.”

She tilted her head slightly, raising an eyebrow inquisitively. “Hear about what?”

“Well, The Vanhooverian went under a while ago. It published its last issue nine months ago before closing up shop.”

She shook her head and raised a hoof dismissively. “That’s not possible. I met a reporter who said he published an article in there three months ago. You must be mistaken.”

“No, I’m not. I’m absolutely positive that they went under. I sold out of their last issue. Maybe your reporter friend meant a different magazine.” He shrugged. “I mean, it’s that or… well,” he said hesitantly, “he could have just been lying, trying to impress you.”

She froze, her cheerful expression slowly falling away. “N-no, that’s… no…”

“I sure am sorry about that,” he said. “Is there anything else I can help you with?”

“No. Um, thank you.” She walked away, head and ears lowered. Was he wrong? He seemed so sure it was that one. Was Fine Print really just lying to impress me? But he didn’t know I was from Vanhoover when he mentioned it. Why would he lie about it?

Then she heard some nearby ponies chatting as she walked by: “...can’t believe that robot’s out like that, asking for hugs!”

“Ha! I know, all alone without the Princess watching it? I guess she thinks it’s safe to…”

The short blurb of conversation made her stop short. She hesitated a moment, but then chased down the pair.

“Excuse me, but did you say you saw Princess Twilight’s robot?”

They both stopped, gawking at her extra limbs.

“Yes, yes, I have mechanical arms!” she said, rolling her eyes. “Please answer me, it’s important!” she cried emphatically.

“Uh, okay,” said one of them. “Last I saw, it was sitting over on Sugar Beet Street, not too far from the Musician’s Guild.”

“Okay, thanks!” she said quickly. She whirled around and took off in that direction.

It’s nothing, she told herself. Turing’s out and about, but I’m sure she can take care of herself.

But the little things were starting to click into place: he lied about writing for The Vanhooverian; he didn’t talk much at all about being a reporter; he knew an abnormal amount about technology and science; and he was definitely interested in Turing Test.

I have to find her before he does! She felt her chest tighten and grit her teeth, desperately hoping that her suspicions were wrong.

***

“Here we are!” Fine Print said, sweeping a foreleg at the building before them. It was a wooden structure, only one story tall, but fairly spacious and completely empty. The doors were wide open.

Turing Test looked it over, up and down. “This wooden structure appears to be empty. What purpose does it serve?”

“It’s just an empty storage shed. Nopony’s using it right now, so I’m sure they won’t mind it if we just use it for a private interview.” He smiled, though that smile was tighter, and just a little more forced.

“Your assessment seems correct: this would be suitable for privacy.”

“Then let’s go in and we can begin,” he said. He motioned for her to go inside while he shut the large wooden doors behind them. With the doors closed, it became dark and the small windows near the roof gave the only illumination save for Turing’s glowing violet eyes.

“Please begin your inquiries. I will attempt to answer to the best of my ability.”

He chuckled. “You really are something,” he murmurred. “Look at you, just talking to ponies like it was the most normal thing in the world.”

“I am not certain what is the maximum amount of normality, but speaking with others is an ordinary function for most ponies. Many concepts of verbal communication elude me, but I am able to communicate with a significant degree of success.”

“Yes, well… I guess I’m just pleased to see it.”

She cocked her head at that, but said nothing.

“Moving on,” he said, taking out his notepad, “what can you tell me about your time with Princess Twilight Sparkle?”

“You wish me to give a summary of our history together?”

“If you please,” Fine Print replied.

“Twilight Sparkle and her companions reactivated me approximately one week ago. Although I was active before that time, my memory was damaged due to a severe electric shock. I have no memory prior to that event and began in my default boot-up sequence. I lacked a primary directive, so Twilight Sparkle gave me the directive to ‘make friends.’ My activities this past week have been spent in attempts to fulfill that directive.”

Fine Print raised an eyebrow, but said nothing.

“Since that time, I have had many interactions with Twilight Sparkle, her associates, and many others.”

“Like what?”

“I engaged in magical practice with Twilight Sparkle--”

“Ah ha!” he cried eagerly, readying his pencil and notepad. “What did you learn?”

“Though I could replicate several advanced spells exactly, any deviation from their exact nature proved impossible. Instead, after trial and error, I learned to levitate many things with ease.”

“Wait, levitation? That’s it?! That’s so basic, you should be ab-- I mean, well…”

“While the technique is basic, I nonetheless experienced what I believed to be ‘gratification’ upon my success.”

He made a sour face. “Do you really believe that?”

“Affirmative. While doubts about my emotional capabilities remain common, I believe that I am correct.”

“But why? I mean, why would you feel that?”

“The achievement was significant. I accomplished it myself through effort and instruction and the result pleased Twilight Sparkle. In such a situation, would a feeling of gratification not be the normal response?”

“Sure, for a real--” He cut that sentence short, waving a hoof dismissively. “Nevermind that. Let’s move on. Any other magic? Nothing unique? No epic fights with monsters or anything that required huge amounts of firepower?”

“No events of that nature have occurred.”

He sighed. “And your relationship with Twilight Sparkle… I’ve heard things are strained, correct?”

“That is…”

He looked up from his notes when she hesitated.

“That is accurate. Twilight Sparkle has recently expressed displeasure with me. The possibility has been raised that she may no longer desire my presence. Nothing has been decided, however. I am attempting to find ways to remedy the situation, although I have not yet reached a definitive conclusion about the best means of proceeding.”

He swallowed. “You mean she still might send you away?”

“Possibly.”

He drew in a breath and stared at her. “Now listen to me: you can not let that happen,” he said, his gaze hard and his voice stern. “It’s important.”

She raised her head and then tilted it to the side. “Strange. This situation concerns you. Why?”

“Just…” He stepped back, sweat forming on his brow. “I mean, it makes a better story! You know, ‘Royalty and a Robot,’ right?” He chuckled nervously. “Makes for a good headline.”

She didn’t respond at first. After a moment, she said “Shall I continue telling you of my interactions?”

“Uh, sure,” he said, relaxing slightly, though she caught him give a quick roll of his eyes.

“Other interactions include playing catch with Spike the Dragon, attempted upgrades to my appearance with Rarity, a race with Rainbow Dash, and recently the rescue of a group of ponies injured in an airship crash. I had positive interaction with one named Fancy Pants, whom I now consider a friend--”

“Tch, Canterlot’s old money,” Fine Print grumbled.

Turing Test went silent. Fine Print had stopped writing in his notepad.

“Anything else you have to say?” he asked. He no longer looked interested. With his eyes half-closed, he looked tired. Bored.

“I will provide no further information.”

Fine Print looked up, startled by that sudden declaration. “Excuse me?”

“You previously claimed an interest in telling my story. However, you doubt my assertions and express a lack of interest in the activities in which I have engaged, save for magic and combat. Furthermore, your interest seems focused on Twilight Sparkle and her activities, rather than my relationship with her. This indicates that my story is not, in fact, your topic of interest.

“Also, your heart rate and other physical signs such as your eye movement and posture seem to indicate a lack of truthfulness in many of the things you say. They also indicate hostility to Twilight Sparkle. That, combined with your lack of nonjudgmental objectivity, which is indicated to be an essential journalistic quality in books I have read on the subject, leads me to conclude that you are in fact not a journalist. I conclude that you are most likely engaged in espionage.”

Fine Print began sweating. “I… I should probably go. Thank you for the interview.”

“Leaving will not be possible.” With astonishing swiftness, she dashed forward and pinned him to the back wall, her impossibly strong foreleg pressing on his chest as she held him in place. He yelled and struggled to free himself, but it was pointless. She looked up at him, regarding his struggles impassively.

“Let me go, what do you think you’re doing?! I order you, put me down!”

“Your actions indicate to me that you mean to do harm to Twilight Sparkle. That must not be allowed. Do not worry, I am forbidden from causing significant harm to organic ponies. Instead, I will now alert anypony nearby to come and assist in your apprehension. You will likely be taken to the Royal Guards and interrogated.”

Fine Print stopped struggling. Turing was about to call for help, but then Fine Print began to laugh.

“Strange. This situation does not seem one that most ponies would find humorous, if my recent experiences are any indication.”

“You really are something,” he said, still chuckling slightly. “Even more than I ever expected. You’ve really come a long way… Unit 003.”

Her eyes contracted slightly. “That is my numerical designation. How did you come by that information?”

“I’d love to catch up with an old acquaintance, but honestly, I think I’ve got all I need.” His face became calm and he closed his eyes, focusing. “Input emergency command code 003-N6MAA10816.”

Turing Test’s eyes shrank to tiny dots and her body went limp as she slumped to a sitting position, dropping Fine Print in the process.

“Emergency delta maintenance mode activated. Unit 003 standing by. Please input your commands.” She sat there like a statue, her voice even flatter and less expressive than usual.

He chuckled, straightening his tie. “There’s a good girl. You had me worried there, 003. I mean, wow, you really could have messed this up.” He took a deep breath, feeling his heart rate return to normal. “You are a marvel, though.” He smiled, almost sad as he walked around her. “Remarkable. You’re even more amazing to me now than when I first helped put you together. Darn near perfect. Ah, but I guess you’re not really listening to me now that your higher functions are off, right?” He wave a hoof almost tauntingly before her eyes, even knocking on her head.

Turing made no response.

“I guess not. Well, even though your original programming was lost, there may still be some use for you. But I can’t have my cover blown. Unit 003, how long ago was it that I first spoke to you?”

“That encounter was 18 minutes and 23 seconds ago.”

“Fine. Unit 003, I order you to completely erase your memory of the last 20 minutes.”

“Understood. Working… memory deleted.”

“Good. I’ll be leaving now.” He paused. “Then again… maybe I shouldn’t leave you like this. Hugs, races, playing catch? Useless.” He shook his head. “I think I’ll take this time to clear your mind of some of the other junk that the Princess has been teaching you. Unit 003, I order you to erase--”

“NO!”

Fine Print whirled around at the familiar voice as the wooden wall behind him was suddenly smashed to pieces and several mechanical limbs reached through. They seized him and yanked him off his hooves, pulling him back out through the newly-made hole. He was thrown to the ground and looked up, groaning and wincing, to see his attacker, though he already knew who it was.

“G-Gadget? What are you doing here?!”

“You,” she hissed, her eyes filled with rage. Her back was arched and her mechanical arms were all curved toward him, their hands claw-like and menacing. “You monster! What did you do to Turing?!”

“N-nothing,” he said as he got to his hooves, “I just--!”

“Liar!” she screamed. Her limbs picked him up by his shirt and slammed him down on the hard ground again. A crowd of onlookers began to gather, many running over to see the commotion.

“I just put her in delta maintenance mode, she’s fine!” He grunted as he stood again, his vision bright and unfocused due to the pain that wracked his body. “She’s basically asleep, just open to any order!”

Gadget considered this, looking over to her mechanical comrade still inside the warehouse. “Turing, er Unit 003: I order you to delete all emergency command codes and reactivate!”

“Understood. Deleting codes and beginning full reboot of systems…”

Fine Print was about to protest, but Gadget seized him by the throat, glaring at him hatefully. As he gasped for air, she finally let him go.

He coughed and wheezed before he finally managed to ask “How long... were you listening in?”

“I came looking for her! And you!” He saw she had angry tears in her eyes and her teeth were clenched. “I was passing by and heard her slam you into the wall. I came over and heard what you said, and… oh my gosh…” She choked back a sob. “You were lying the whole time… you never cared about me at all, did you? You just used me to get to her and Princess Twilight!”

“No!” he said emphatically, his eyes pleading. “Gadget, please, I may not be who I said I was, but that… I promise that was just something that I didn’t mean to happen.” He put his hoof to his chest and lowered his head. “And I’m… I’m sorry.”

She relaxed a moment, blinking away her tears.

“Really,” he said, sighing as he did so, and drew a small metallic rectangle, about the size of a playing card, from inside of his shirt. “I’m sorry.”

Using his magic, he tossed it at her. Gasping in surprise, she caught it with one of her mechanical hands. It made a high-pitched whine as the little disc on it began to turn.

“Huh?” she asked, staring at it. “What is--”

The device suddenly sent out a large burst of electricity, a miniature lightning storm, which coursed through her mechanical limbs and into her. She screamed as the onlookers all shouted in equal surprise and horror. The electricity ceased and Gadget collapsed to the ground, breathing, though barely conscious.

Fine Print had already used the chaos to escape, though he gave one last look over his shoulder as he ran as fast as he could.

“Who was that guy?” one of the onlookers shouted.

“Never mind that, somepony help that poor girl!”

“Is she okay? Call a doctor!”

“I think she’s breathing! Everypony, give her some space!”

One of the onlookers caught sight of something above them and recognized the figure even in the bright daytime sky. “Princess Twilight! Please, down here!”

Twilight saw the crowd gathered around somepony and there was debris all over the alley behind the warehouse. She landed and gasped in horror at what she saw. The girl was there in the dress that Rarity had chosen for her, but she was flat on the ground, motionless, and there was a small device she didn’t recognize in one mechanical hand.

“Gadget! Oh no, oh my gosh, Gadget, are you all right?!”

Gadget coughed, gently raising her head. “I… I think so.” She swallowed, making a face. “My mouth tastes like a lightbulb, but I’m… wait, Turing! Is Turing Test okay?!”

Twilight turned her head and saw Turing. She breathed a sigh of relief when she saw her, apparently unharmed, still sitting in the wooden building.

“Loading… reboot complete.” She raised her head, her eyes returning to normal. “Twilight Sparkle? Has something happened? I was performing observations in another location, but I am now here. There is a 20 minute gap in my memory that I cannot account for. Did something occur?”

“I’m not sure yet,” Twilight said. “Are you okay?”

“I appear to be functioning normally. Systems are undamaged.”

“Okay, great. I’m…” She breathed a sigh of relief. “I’m really glad you’re all right.” She turned back to Gadget with a smile. “She’s fine, Gadget.”

Turing moved her head and spotted Gadget. Without another word, she dashed past Twilight. “Gadget, are you injured? Do you require medical attention?”

“I’m fine, really. I’m just glad you are too.” She tried to stand and erupted into a coughing fit.

Twilight went to her, bracing her with her magic. “Easy, Gadget, don’t rush it--”

“No, you don’t understand. Fine Print…”

“Huh? Your new boyf--”

“He’s a liar! A spy!” She coughed again, but looked to Twilight desperately. “He attacked me! He’s one of the ponies who built Turing and he wanted to mess with her memory! He knows why she came here in the first place! You have to stop him before he gets away!”

Twilight’s eyes went wide in shock, and then she grit her teeth. “Turing, stay here and help Gadget. I’ll go after Fine Print.”

***

In his room at the Ponyville Inn, Fine Print haphazardly stuffed his papers and photographs into his suitcase on the bed. He had to get out of Ponyville immediately and leave no trace behind. No matter what else happened, his post in the little hamlet was finished.

There was a heavy knock at the door.

“Uh, sorry, I’m a bit busy!” he called.

The door exploded, a magical bolt blasting it right off its hinges. Twilight Sparkle stood in the doorway, wings spread and eyes aflame.

“HOUSEKEEPING!!” she shouted.

Fine Print stared back in frozen horror. One eye was twitching. His jaw went slack.

“How dare you hurt my friends!” she screamed. Then she noticed his suitcase and all the things he was stuffing into it. Among them she spotted an image of herself. “And what is all this?!”

With her magic, she yanked it off his bed before he could stop her, scattering everything onto the floor. She gasped when she saw all the notes, diagrams… and especially the pictures. They were all of Turing Test, but she was in many of them. They were taken at a distance and they were from the different things the pair had done from the past week. Even her visit with Applejack the previous day was documented.

“You… who… who do you think you are?!” Twilight didn’t think she could have become any angrier, but somehow her rage had grown. She was seething, breathing like a wild bull about to charge.

Fine Print gulped, but his gaze hardened and he stared back at her hatefully. “I’m nopony. Nopony you’d care to know, Princess.” He used his magic to gather up all his things in one fell swoop, again stuffing them in his suitcase.

“The town constable and others are on their way! I told the hotel manager to get help too. You’re trapped and you’re not going anywhere.”

He sneered at her. “See, that’s where you’re wrong, Your Highness.” And from his pocket, he drew out another rectangular device. The same sort she’d seen Gadget clutching.

In fear of being attacked, Twilight staggered back into the hallway. But this device didn’t send out a shock and he didn’t throw it. He activated it and held it to his chest as he picked up his suitcase.

His sneer became a smug grin. “See you around, Princess Twilight Sparkle.”

There was a flash of light and Fine Print was gone. His room was now totally empty, save for a small stack of bits on the desk to pay for his room.

***

An hour later, back at the castle, Twilight, Turing, Gadget, and Spike were gathered in the library.

“Single-use mechanical spell cards,” Gadget said, holding up the device Fine Print had thrown at her. She’d taken the front plate off of it, displaying the intricate patterns and runic designs inside. “There’s a tiny matrix of circuitry and a little disc with a simulated voice. It uses a vial of impure thaumatrium to supply the magic and can cast a single spell. Pretty clever. You could even pre-program a high level spell, like the defensive lightning spell Fine--” she paused, her features darkening, “...like the one that liar used on me.”

“And that’s how he was able to teleport away too,” Twilight said, nodding her head. “Not many ponies in all of Equestria could manage a teleportation spell naturally. I only know a few, and he doesn’t strike me as an expert. That’s why he had that spell card.” She sighed. “I’m sorry I let him get away.”

“No,” Gadget said, “I’m sorry that I nearly exposed you and Turing to him!”

“Oh for pony’s sake!” Spike exclaimed, throwing his arms up. “Can we just can the ‘sorry’ stuff? It wasn’t anypony’s fault except that Fine Print guy.”

Gadget looked down. “That jerk.” She sucked in a deep breath. “Oh well… there are better guys all over Equestria.”

Twilight went over to her and hugged her gently. “I’m sorry, Gadget. But you’re right; there are better guys. Are you going to be okay?”

“I… yeah. Yes, I will.” She swallowed, nodding to her silently before offering a weak smile. “I’ll be okay.”

“Lots of the others are looking for him, but I think he’s long gone, at least for now. I’m just glad you ordered Turing to delete any other commands that could be used to shut her down like that.”

Gadget smiled, one of her mechanical hands giving Twilight a “thumbs-up” gesture. “I’m glad too. And speaking of which, I think we’ve got more important things to talk about than my evil ex-almost-boyfriend.”

They turned to look at Turing Test who was sitting there. As always, she was just patiently observing them in silence, unless you counted the slight mechanical sound of her head as her gaze followed them.

“Is there something you wish to discuss with me?” Turing asked.

“There is, and it’s overdue,” Twilight said, taking a deep breath. “Turing Test, if there’s anypony in this room I need to apologize to more than anyone else, it’s you.”

“It is not necessary--”

“It is completely necessary, Turing,” Twilight said, cutting her off. “I’ve been treating you like a normal, organic pony. But you aren’t. I expected too much of you, and when you didn’t meet those expectations, I treated you like furniture. I just… I just shut you in a room for a whole day. And you didn’t even complain!”

“There was no point in complaining. Your orders--”

“--Were wrong, Turing! My orders can be wrong and even though I’m glad you listened to me, you had the right to voice your opinion if you had one. You always have that right with me.”

Turing didn’t respond, but continued sitting there, her ears twitching as she listened.

“Listen… I made a mistake,” she said, lowering her head. “After what happened yesterday with Applejack, I got paranoid. I was hurt and confused and scared and I didn’t know what to do. I’ve never known anypony like you, Turing, and suddenly I felt helpless because I wasn’t sure if the problem was your fault or mine for not knowing how to take care of you. I felt like I’d failed.”

“No, Twilight Sparkle, you--”

“Please, please, Turing, let me finish,” she said as she raised her hoof, her voice strained. “Rarity and Gadget were right when they said you are like a child. I didn’t need to punish you or push you away for not developing more quickly. And then Rainbow Dash helped me realize that I wasn’t respecting your own feelings. Instead of worrying how you care, I should have been glad that you care.

“Besides, Gadget also told me about some computer science theory I don’t really get, but the point is that emotions may just come to you naturally, in time. And I want you to take your time, however much you need. Just because you can’t feel affection right now is no reason for me to stop feeling my affection for you. And I’m so, so sorry that I was too stubborn to see that, Turing. You…” She swallowed, finding it hard to continue. “You suffered because of me.”

She smiled, her gaze calm and serene for the first time since the previous day. “I’ve talked to almost everypony, but I left out someone else: you. Turing, please tell me what it is that you want.”

Turing stuck her hoof out, holding it bottom-side up as she’d done before. “That is irrelevant. For example, a cart--”

“Turing, no!” Twilight said, stomping her hoof vehemently. “I heard what you said to Gadget and that is wrong. You are not a cart. Yes, you are both machines, but that’s not a good comparison, any more than saying I’m no different from a paramecium just because we’re both organic!”

Turing put her hoof down slowly. “Understood.”

“Good. Then tell me, because I really want to know, and it does matter to me: how do you feel, honestly, and what do you want? Speak your mind, ask me questions, whatever! Or don’t, if you’d rather not. But make a choice because you want to make it!”

Turing’s eyes flickered momentarily as something inside her shifted. “That is a complex question. I will attempt to reply, Twilight Sparkle.”

She paused, and Twilight gasped as Turing raised her hoof again, tapping the side of her head. She was thinking about it, considering it, and using gestures other than her simplistic head-tilting to show it.

“To begin, I do not fully understand why you activated me, Twilight Sparkle. I know I am troublesome for you at times and my actions cause you irritation and exasperation. I can only conjecture that it was a matter of curiosity. Am I correct?”

Twilight smiled. “I suppose that’s a big part of it. Yes.”

“Understood. When you gave me the directive to make friends, I did not know how to accomplish this. However, the process of interacting and adjusting my efforts has given me near constant input. My system informs me of accomplishments by means of positive feedback. It is, for lack of a better word, ‘pleasant’ to me.

“For instance, I received a great deal of positive feedback with the knowledge that my existence had value to you. Furthermore, by seeking to make friends and by integrating and updating my information gained from my activities, I have experienced things that I did not know were possible. My programming had many limitations, yet I have surpassed them. New ways of thinking have allowed this. I have developed curiosity, creativity, and innovation where none existed. Through my attempts at friendship, I may continue to develop in this manner.”

She stopped and slowly lowered her head. Twilight was about to say something, thinking she had finished, but then she began again.

“I must now inform you of a failing on my part, Twilight Sparkle. Gadget asked me to consider the possibility of being sent away. I calculated the probability of such an event at 0%. Gadget informed me that this was an error. I analyzed the error and discovered that my lower cognitive function had created a subroutine that automatically set the result of my calculation to 0, thus giving me a false conclusion. Evidently, my lower function attempted to avoid confronting the results.”

“Wait, what? You mean you were… in denial?”

“That would be accurate. In essence, part of me did not wish to know the truth. I corrected the error and prevented a re-occurrance. However, when I properly ran the calculation and received a non-zero result, it triggered a cognitive loop, resulting in an emotion. I then learned why my lower cognitive function did not wish to know the result.”

She looked up at Twilight. “I became sad. The possibility of leaving made me sad. The thought that I no longer had value to you also made me sad. This experience was far more intense and created far greater negative feedback than the previous instance. I wanted it to cease, but it did not. My sadness continued for an extended period of time. It persisted until the point when I was reactivated after my encounter with Fine Print.

“Upon seeing you there and expressing concern for me, Twilight Sparkle, the loop terminated. Due to your presence, I was no longer sad.”

Twilight covered her mouth. “Oh. Oh, Turing…”

“It is true that I have not yet felt affection. I desire to do so, though I have not shown the capability. My observations suggest it is an intriguing and highly positive experience.

“However, if I am allowed to consider the criteria of ‘high regard’ as a measure of friendship, then I can say that I do, in fact, ‘like’ you. Your influence and that of others is of exceptional importance to me. I wish to continue these experiences and the possibility of assuming some other function or of no longer having these experiences with you is highly undesirable. Without my friends, I believe my existence would be… lessened. For this reason, I request that you do not… do not…”

They all looked to each other, then back to her. “Turing?” Gadget said, moving hesitantly toward her. “Is something wrong?”

“Rectifying: Please… d-d-d,” she said, her eyes flickering and her head jerking slightly to the side.

“Please don’t send me away. Twilight Sparkle, what I want above all else is to stay here with you. I want to be with my friends.”

Twilight came over and put her hoof on Turing’s shoulder. The Princess had tears in her eyes.

“Turing, I think your calculation was right all along, even if the math wasn’t,” she said quietly. “Zero percent is right. I’ve made my decision: I will never send you away for as long as you care to stay with me. I won’t sell you, I won’t order you away, and I’ll defend your right to stay to anypony who says otherwise. Even Celestia, if it comes to that.”

Turing looked down at the hoof on her shoulder, then back to Twilight. “Does this mean that you once again consider us friends, Twilight Sparkle?”

She nodded and offered her a warm smile. “Of course.” She drew her robot friend into an embrace.

“Oh. Hug initiated.” Slowly, unsurely, she returned the embrace, gently wrapping her forelegs around Twilight. “Thank you, Twilight Sparkle.”

A moment later, Gadget and Spike came over and likewise joined the embrace.

“Odd,” Turing said. “I seem to be experiencing a new emotion. However, I am unable to sufficiently describe or identify it. I only know that I… like it.”

“That’s okay, Turing,” Twilight said quietly and the group separated. “You can take all the time you need to discover what it means to be one of us.”

Turing gave a quick nod. “Acknowledged. I will do my best.”

“And you, Gadget!” Twilight shouted, turning to point at her with a sudden burst of energy. “You are going to check out of that hotel! You’re spending the night here with us, your friends!”

“What?! B-but I’m leaving tomorrow morning and Mr. Vanderbull said--”

“Hey, I’m about to send a letter to Princess Celestia telling her that I’m keeping Turing Test here no matter what she says,” she said slyly. “If I can afford to defy my mentor, then so can you.”

Gadget beamed at her. “I’ll get my stuff!” She turned to the robot with a mischievous grin. “Turing Test, ready yourself for a sleepover! I hope you’re prepared for a pillow fight!”

“Understood. The pillows will stand no chance.”

***

A long distance away in a tiny cabin in the middle of a wild, overgrown forest, the unicorn known as Fine Print sat alone. It was dark out and he was cold. Owls and other nocturnal animals created a cacophony. He’d wrapped himself in his blankets and eaten the emergency ration found under the floorboards. He’d waited for hours at this little rendezvous point, expecting contact the whole time, but now he was wondering if he’d been left behind.

He shivered and tapped his hoof incessantly.

Then he heard the soft sound of hooves coming through the vegetation and then onto the wooden planks of the porch. He tensed up, ready to defend himself.

The door opened wide and he saw his contact there, his familiar frame illuminated in the moonlight. “We have transportation. Come with me.”

“Right, right,” he said, gathering up his things and trotting out after him.

“You’re sure the plan is still viable?” the contact said, leading him onto a dark path through the forest.

“Yes, absolutely. Not what we had in mind, but we’re fine. Unit 003 is functional and she’ll do what she’s designed to do.”

“It.”

“What?”

“I said ‘it.’ Yeesh, you engineers get too attached,” the contact laughed. “It’s not a real mare; it’s not a ‘she,’ no matter how much you want it to be. You crack me up, Umahara.”

Umahara, the stallion who’d been calling himself Fine Print, rolled his eyes. “Very funny. I’m into real mares, thank you.”

He paused at that, sighing heavily as he looked down and saw that he was still wearing the nice shirt and tie he’d worn to his lunch date.

Gadget… one day I hope you’ll understand. Maybe then you’ll forgive me for what I did.

To be continued…

Author's Notes:

And with that, this dramatic arc comes to a close! Lots to say, not the least of which is to once again thank everyone who has continued to support this story. It means a lot to me.

References and jokes were few and far between, but here they are:

*The name of the cafe "Fine Print" and Gadget meet at is called the "Dazy Daisy." Their dialogue mimics the song the HAL-9000 slowly sings as he is being deactivated: "Daisy, Daisy, give me your answer, do. I'm half crazy, all for the love of you..."

*Turing's emergency maintenance code number is a pretty obscure reference, but it's actually the murderous replicant/android Roy Batty's serial number from the movie "Blade Runner."

*The pun-tastic librarian is an unnamed unofficial cameo of one of my favorite tumblr comic characters, Pun Pony: Royal Toponymist, member of Luna's secret Night Guard, and public librarian in Ponyville.

But the big reference is the title, and it's another musical one. It references a song which partially inspired the theme of this chapter.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hXGnTtL_V_Q

I hope you all have enjoyed this more dramatic story arc, but for those who prefer the more light-hearted humor, no need to worry, this was only a short departure. Next chapter, you may just find your patience rewarded.

Edit: Also, if you're interested, I've added a blog post with a deleted scene which showed Twilight and Gadget's nightmares in detail. Not canon, obviously.

An Exception Has Occurred

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“So then,” Twilight said, laughing the whole time, “Rainbow Dash just comes right out of the closet!”

“Ha! What did Rarity do?” Gadget asked, holding her sides and gasping for air at the conclusion of Twilight’s story.

“She nearly fainted! Pinkie had to catch her!”

“And what did Applejack say when Dash came out?”

“She didn’t seem that surprised, actually.”

Twilight, Gadget, and Turing Test were all gathered in Twilight’s bedroom. The evening fun had continued for hours, with them telling ghost stories, doing makeovers, having pillow fights, and now swapping funny stories.

“I do not understand the point of hiding in a closet, jumping out, and attempting to frighten others,” Turing remarked. “My information indicates that friendship should involve comfort, companionship, and engaging in activities of mutual interest. Why would Rainbow Dash wish to cause her other friends distress?”

“It’s… kind of hard to explain,” Twilight said, standing up suddenly. “Hang on, you two. I’ve got to use the restroom.”

“Have fun, don’t fall in!” Gadget called after her, earning a roll of the eyes from Twilight.

“You need not be concerned. I have seen Twilight Sparkle’s bathroom and the toilet is of normal size to prevent accidental entry.”

“That’s… that’s great, Turing, I’m so relieved,” Gadget replied flatly. Then her ears lifted and her eyes sparkled. “Ooh, but when Princess Twilight gets back, I can ask her again if she has a crush on anypony! She was awfully evasive earlier…”

“You seem very interested in relationships. Does this have anything to do with your recent attempt at one with Fine Print?”

Her good cheer drained away and she lowered her head, giving a long sigh.

“I have unintentionally upset you, Gadget. I am sorry.”

“No, no, it’s all right,” she said, waving a hoof and offering a weak smile.

“I have an inquiry then, if you are willing to assist me.”

She nodded. “Of course, Turing, I’d do anything to help you!”

Turing paused, again tapping her chin with her hoof as she tried to formulate her question adequately. “Gadget, I must first offer you my thanks, as it is my understanding that you helped Twilight Sparkle come to her decision to accept me as I am and my friendship for what it is.”

“Aw, you’re welcome!”

“I wish to know, then: can it be said that you also have affection for me?”

Gadget blushed. “Ah, jeez, you have to say it so plainly?”

“How does this affection feel? I wish to know since I have never felt the emotion myself.”

Gadget swallowed. “It, um,” she began, “it feels warm. Like, I can feel it here,” she said, placing her hooves on her chest, “and… and here,” she placed her hooves on her cheeks. “It makes me want to smile and… it makes me want to do other things.”

“I understand the physiological reaction, but that is something I cannot replicate. Perhaps you could describe your mental state?”

Gadget’s blush deepened and she turned from her robot companion. “T-Turing, please… why are you asking me? Twilight-hime is the one who should be instructing you.”

“I have realized,” Turing said, “that the differences between Master Twilight and myself may be too great to reconcile. But you, Gadget, are both organic and also mechanical, in part.” She came over and took hold of one of Gadget’s mechanical arms, running her brass hoof down its length. Gadget shivered.

“T-Turing-chan, p-please… m-my arms… you shouldn’t touch them that way…”

“I apologize,” she said, letting them go. Gadget opened her eyes, but somehow looked disappointed. “My point is that you may form the bridge between my mechanical nature and that of ponykind. Gadget-chan, I… I wish to know of this strange thing you ponies call ‘love.’ Beep.”

Gadget found she could no longer look Turing in the eyes. She turned away. “Oh… oh, that’s such a bold request, Turing-chan! And… and yet…”

She slowly turned back to Turing Test and swallowed. “But maybe I’ve been looking in the wrong places for love too. Maybe you… maybe you can teach me something as well…”

Her mechanical arms shot around Turing and she drew herself closer. Her eyes grew glassy and her mouth was slightly opened as she moved ever closer. “Turing-chan… I know Twilight-sensei warned me about this…”

“Gadget-senpai? What are you doing? Oh. My circuits seem to be heating up. Something is stirring deep within my heart drive. Have you installed a new emotion within me? Beep boop beep.”

Gadget’s breath came in short, shaky spurts as she removed her glasses. “Turing-chan,” she whispered, her lips just inches from Turing’s face, “ai… aishite--”

“HI TURING, HI GADGET!”

A pink blur shot up between the two of them and Gadget leaped back. “N-nani?! Pinkie-senpai, how did you get in here! Mou! Does Twilight-sensei-sama-hime know you’re here?”

“Aw, don’t be mad, Gadget!” Pinkie laughed. “I just heard there was a slumber party and I hate to miss a party!”

“Then I believe Master Twilight would like you to be here. Beep boop beep.”

Just then, Twilight returned with the Pocky and green tea and sushi she’d promised and set them down. “Ah, Pinkie-chan! I’m glad you’re here! How can I help you?”

“I just heard that Turing is becoming friends with a lot of different ponies and I wanted in!” She turned to Turing Test. “So, Turing, do you want to be friends?”

“Yes.”

“Well,” Twilight said. “That was easy.”

“It sure was! No conflict or anything like that! Guess it’s time to end the chapter! Now the bold text says ‘To be continued!’”

To be cont-- wait, what?!

How--

WHAT THE BUCK JUST HAPPENED?!

Giggle at the Ghost in the Machine, Part 1

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“Thanks again for taking me down to the train station,” Gadget said. Her lone suitcase was nearby and she, Twilight, and Turing Test all sat patiently on the platform as they awaited the arrival of the morning train.

“I’m glad you came to visit, Gadget. Sorry again for all the, you know… drama.” Twilight smiled warmly at the younger mare. “You really helped out a lot, though. And I know Turing Test enjoyed having you too! Right, Turing?”

“Affirmative.”

They waited for her to say more, but she merely sat there like a sentinel, much as she always did.

“Well, don’t get all mushy on me, Turing,” Gadget said sarcastically, though she chuckled anyway.

“Understood. I will maintain my current rigidity.”

Twilight and Gadget shared a mutual facehoof.

“That gesture,” Turing remarked, turning her head to observe the two of them. “Am I being exasperating again?”

Twilight looked away. “You know, I should stop doing that around you.”

“Same here. I feel guilty about it now.” Gadget yawned suddenly and covered her mouth with one of her mechanical hands.

“Did you receive insufficient rest last night, Gadget?” Turing asked.

“I don’t think either one of us got that much sleep at all, honestly,” Twilight said. She gave a yawn as well. “But that party sure was fun. I especially liked stargazing with you two...”

***

The previous night…

The three of them were staring up at the stars, lying on their backs out on Twilight’s balcony. It was a clear night and the sheer number of stars that dotted the heavens was almost overwhelming. Gadget had taken off the Point Dexter to be more comfortable, and periodically she made small notes on her notepad.

“And that one, Turing,” Twilight said, pointing at one of the constellations, “is Monoceros, the Unicorn.”

“I do not see how it resembles a unicorn, Twilight Sparkle.”

“Well, most constellations don’t really resemble such things,” Twilight replied. She smiled slightly. She’d had such conversations with her friends before. She knew a great many constellations and most of them, even with the charts, barely looked like anything to anypony. “But they’re still part of our history. Even back in the early days of Celestia and Luna’s reign, some ponies still believed in the myths about those stars.”

“Of course,” Gadget said, cutting in, “we now know that they’re just balls of hot burning gas far, far away. They aren’t even really that close to each other; they just look like pictures to us ponies down here.”

Twilight made a face. “Well, sure. But it’s still fun to retell those old stories. Just because they’re myths is no reason to forget them.”

“I guess,” Gadget said. “But I just can’t get over the fact that ponies really used to believe that they were real things that had been put in the sky. And now we retell those stories like fairy tales for fun. Still, they are beautiful. I don’t get a good look at them from Manehatten: the city’s electric lights get in the way.”

“That’s too bad,” Twilight remarked. “But I guess sometimes you have to sacrifice something when you adopt new technology. We lose precious things in the name of progress.”

“Does that include me, Twilight Sparkle?” Turing asked.

Twilight and Gadget went totally silent at Twilight’s unintentional faux pas. The looked at each other, silently wondering what the other should say.

“Perhaps you did not hear me. Repeating--”

“No, no, I heard you, Turing,” Twilight said. “Um, no, so far I haven’t had to give up anything precious for you. In fact, the last day or so has made me happy that you’re here.”

“Understood. I am glad, as I do not wish you to lose something for my sake.”

Twilight sighed, relieved that Turing didn’t take offense. Granted, she wasn’t sure Turing could actually feel insulted in the first place, but that was no reason to be insensitive. She then noticed that Gadget seemed somewhat distracted from her stargazing.

“Gadget, I noticed that you keep writing things on your notepad. What are you up to?”

“Hm? Oh,” she said, showing Twilight the sketch she’d drawn. It was crude, but it looked like Turing’s basic shape along with several notes alongside it. In big letters were the words “FARADAY CAGE.”

“What does that mean?” Twilight asked.

“Glad you asked!” Gadget said, standing up. “So, Turing is built exceptionally well. The amount of advanced technology and innovation she carries is just astonishing. But, if you’ll forgive the insult, you do have a few notable flaws.”

“There is no need for forgiveness, Gadget,” Turing said. “The existence of flaws appears to be a normal part of any being.”

“Right, so--”

“For example, your nearsightedness or Twilight Sparkle’s obsessiveness or--”

“Yes, thank you, Turing, I understand,” Gadget said, fidgeting with her glasses self-consciously. “Anyway, the biggest problem you have is--”

“A lack of eyelids?”

“What? No!” Gadget said, rolling her eyes. “I’ll work on that problem later. For now, your biggest problem is your vulnerability to lightning. The ponies who designed you either didn’t think about protecting you from electric shocks or didn’t think they were a significant risk. The fact that lightning damaged you and made you lose your memory before Miss Applejack’s sister found you is proof that you do need some protection. Especially if you’re going to be flying through more clouds. Even a small electric shock could wreak havoc on your systems.”

“That is true,” Twilight remarked. She looked over at Turing worriedly. “That’s something I was a little worried about when you challenged Rainbow Dash to a race.”

“Understood. Do you have a remedy for this?”

“I do!” Gadget cried excitedly, holding out her sketch again. “A Faraday cage would direct electric shocks around your internal systems and prevent damage. Your hull mostly works like one anyway, so with some modifications to your internal structure, Turing, I think I could protect you from electric shocks or high-intensity electromagnetism that could damage your processes.” She sighed. “Unfortunately, I can’t do anything on this visit. I’ll need to get some extra wiring and maybe some mu-metal to protect you.”

“Well, if you can’t do anything about it now,” Twilight said, patting the floor next to her, “then come sit back down and enjoy the stars with us.”

“Yes. Your companionship is providing me with significant data and experiences, Gadget, though I thank you for considering ways to improve upon my structure.”

“Actually,” Gadget said, pulling her jacket around her, “could we go back inside? I’m having fun and I don’t want to end the night already, but it’s getting cold out here. I’m freezing my tail off!”

Turing was on her hooves in a second. “Quickly, Gadget: we must go inside and I will use my mane or tail to warm you.”

“W-what?” Gadget asked. “There’s no big hurry, Turing.”

“You indicated that your tail was suffering extreme hypothermia to the point of possible loss.”

Gadget resisted another facehoof as Twilight chuckled. “No, no, Turing, she was just using an expression.”

“Clarifying: she was using an idiom?”

Twilight nodded as she got up. “Right. She was using hyperbole: she was saying something that was way more extreme than the truth to show her feelings.”

Turing tilted her head slightly. “Accessing… hyperbole definition found. Analyzing… understood.”

“Uh, good. So, like, if I wanted to say something like that, I could say ‘It’s so cold that I’m freezing my wings off!’” She ruffled her wings slightly for emphasis. “Why don’t you try it?”

Turing looked down at the wings, then back up at Twilight and then from her to Gadget. “Understood. Attempting hyperbole…”

Gadget and Twilight leaned forward, hoping that this would be Turing’s first successful attempt at hyperbole.

“The ambient temperature is of such insufficient heat--”

“Turing, Turing,” Twilight said, “just ‘It’s so cold,’ will be fine.”

“Understood. Correcting idiom…” She paused a moment before trying again. Her companions waited with bated breath.

“It is so cold that I am freezing my nuts off.”

They both gawked at her, eyes wide and jaws dropped.

“Was that sufficient?”

“Turing...” Twilight began slowly, “that was… um… what did you mean?”

“My nuts.” Turing looked between the two of them.

“Okay, Twilight,” Gadget said, still staring at Turing. “I call ‘not it’ on explaining this.”

“Is my hyperbole not logical? I was indicating that my nuts would freeze, possibly to the point of them becoming brittle and breaking off--”

Gadget started to cough, which started to turn to laughter. Twilight’s horror grew worse.

“--the end result of which would be that my bolts would come loose. That would be a disadvantageous situation, correct?”

At last Twilight also laughed. In fact, the two of them practically collapsed to the floor from laughing so hard.

“Ohhh!” Twilight exclaimed. “Oh gosh, oh thank goodness! ‘Nuts and bolts!’ You meant those nuts!”

“Correct. These nuts.”

Their laughter grew louder and more insane, though Turing never did understand what they were laughing at. She only watched them, curious, as Twilight, still laughing, led them inside.

***

“Oh boy, the next time I see a bowl of almonds or something, I’m going to lose it,” Gadget said, still chuckling to herself.

The train had arrived and various ponies were boarding. Gadget took one last look at her friends before she had to go.

“Well, Twilight, Turing, it was a lot of fun.” She went over and hugged Twilight. “Thanks for a wonderful time.”

She then moved to Turing and likewise hugged her.

“Hug initiated. Reciprocating hug.” Turing wrapped her forelegs around Gadget. “Is this sufficient?”

“Can’t--hrk--breathe!” Gadget croaked.

Turing immediately released her, but then Gadget started laughing again. “Ha! Just kidding!”

Turing tilted her head to the side. “You are uninjured?”

“No, it was just a joke, Turing!” Gadget said, still laughing.

Twilight rolled her eyes as she shook her head. “Gadget, please don’t tease her. She doesn’t get those kinds of jokes yet.”

“Right, right, I’m sorry.” She smiled at the two of them and took a deep breath. “Well, this is it. I better get on. If I miss this train, Mr. Vanderbull will eat me for breakfast.”

Turing was on her hooves again.

“--Figuratively!” Gadget said, holding out her hoof. “I just mean Mr. Vanderbull will be angry.”

Turing sat back down. “Understood.”

Gadget hung her head slightly. “I… I really wish I could stay longer. But Mr. Vanderbull wants me to look more into who might have built you, Turing. We’re just starting the search process, but now that I’ve got this,” she said, holding up the used mechanical spell card Fine Print had used on her, “we might have another clue. Plus, maybe somepony will track down Fine-- that guy.” She hesitated before adding, “Um… I’d really like to visit again soon, Twilight, if that’s okay.”

“Sure!” Twilight said, smiling brightly. “Next time you have another day off, please come visit! Just send me a letter or a telegram first, all right?”

Gadget nodded emphatically.

“All aboard!” the conductor shouted.

“Oh jeez, I better go!” She picked up her suitcase with one of her mechanical limbs and ran to the train car.

Turing and Twilight watched as the train began to move, slowly trundling down the tracks. Just before they were about to turn away, a window on the passenger car opened. Gadget stuck her head out the window.

“Goodbye, Twilight! Goodbye, Turing! Don’t forget to write!” All four of her mechanical arms stuck out of the window and began to wave goodbye in unison. Except for her front left hand, which flashed a peace sign.

Twilight sighed. “I’m going to miss that strange girl,” Twilight said as they watched the train depart.

“I will miss her too. Gadget is very kind to me. In that respect, she is much like you, Twilight Sparkle.”

“Oh, that’s nice of you to say, Turing,” Twilight said, “though I honestly still feel bad about how I was treating you. I’m going to find a way to make it up to you, though. For starters, I’m going to talk to Applejack about what happened as soon as I can. Heck, after what happened with Fine Print, we even know that you’re not under anypony’s control.”

“It seems not. I am glad. I do not desire to harm anypony. It was fortunate that Gadget removed my emergency maintenance codes.”

“We’re all lucky she was passing by when you confronted Fine Print.” Twilight sighed. “I still can’t believe you don’t remember any of that. He really erased part of your memory, didn’t he?”

“Affirmative. However, they do not seem to have been particularly significant.”

Twilight smiled contentedly. “Honestly, Turing, I’m just glad you’re safe. When I found out what almost happened to you, I… I really got worried.”

“Thank you for your concern, Twilight Sparkle.”

The two of them continued on until they reached the castle. But it was then that Twilight noticed the pink envelope stuck to the castle door. She removed it with her magic and tore it open. A burst of confetti flew out and Twilight, momentarily startled, gave a laugh as she removed the letter inside to read it.

“What does the exploding letter say, Twilight Sparkle?”

Twilight smiled. “Looks like you’re about to have another first-time experience, Turing.” She opened the door and led her in. “I better go tell Spike so we can all get ready for tonight. You’re getting your very first Pinkie Pie party!”

***

That evening, Twilight, Spike, and Turing approached Sugar Cube Corner.

“The facade of this building resembles confections.”

“Yes, Turing, that’s the idea,” Twilight said.

“Would that not cause some ponies to attempt to devour parts of the building? That would compromise the structural stability.”

Twilight rolled her eyes. “Turing, I doubt anypony would be foolish enough to actually try eating it.”

“Understood.” She looked at the box Twilight was carrying. It was flat, wrapped in bright purple paper, and tied with a green ribbon and bow. Spike also had a box with similar wrapping, though it was smaller and more cube-shaped. “You are bringing this as a present for this party,” Turing remarked, pointing at the box. “I have read that it is often customary to bring a gift, yet I have not prepared one. Is that not a problem? I do not wish to appear unfriendly at such a social gathering.”

Twilight and Spike exchanged glances, both grinning mischieviously.

“I don’t think anypony will expect you to bring a gift to this party, Turing,” Spike replied. “Just try to have fun.”

“Fun.” Turing echoed the word, her ears twitching as they neared the door. “I will attempt to experience it.”

They knocked on the door and it instantly opened, nearly ripped from its hinges by the exuberant pony inside.

“You’re all here!” Pinkie Pie shouted. “Come on in! Everypony, they’re here!”

They entered and half a dozen other ponies were there to greet them. They all cheered when Turing stepped in.

“Strange. Inquiry: Twilight Sparkle, why is everypony staring at me?”

Twilight beamed. “Because this isn’t just a party, Turing… Pinkie Pie threw this party specifically for you!”

Turing Test took in her surroundings. There was a table which held a massive cake and a bowl of punch along with other party snacks. Another table held several gifts. Over the table was a banner which read:

“HAPPY ~~BIRTH~~ ~~ACTIVA~~ ONE WEEK TURNING ON-IVERSARY, TURING TEST!”

Turing slowly seemed to understand. She saw the gifts piled on a separate table. And she saw that everypony was looking directly at her. Rainbow Dash and Rarity were there along with Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle. Bulk Biceps, Pallette Swap, and a few other ponies who had congratulated her on the race against Rainbow Dash were also there. And of course, there was Pinkie Pie, who had a massive, toothy grin on her face. She, along with everypony else, seemed to be waiting for her to respond in some way.

“Please clarify: you are having a celebration as the equivalent of a birthday party. And it is for my sake that you are throwing it. Is this correct?”

“Exactly!” Pinkie cheered, leaping into the air. “Sweetie Belle, go start the music and we can get this party started!”

The music began and everypony began to mingle, dance, or just enjoy some snacks as the party got underway.

Twilight gave Turing Test a small hug. “Happy birthday, Turing Test!” she said.

“But Twilight Sparkle, it is, in fact, not my birthday.”

Pinkie Pie zipped over to the two of them. “That’s true!” she said. “I realized that when I was making the banner. I was like, ‘I never had a party for Turing Test’s birthday!’ And then I was all, ‘But she wasn’t actually born, she was built!’ but ‘happy being built day’ doesn’t have the right ring to it either, plus we don’t actually know when you were built, so I went with ‘happy activation day’ but that wasn’t right either since it was a week ago, so I finally settled on ‘one week turning-on-iversary!’”

Turing Test stood listening to this, her gaze impassive as ever. “Thank you for describing the process.”

At that moment, Rarity walked over, levitating a cup of punch, and put her hoof on Turing’s shoulder. “Good to see you again, Turing. I hope this experience is a bit more chipper for you. After all, one week and with all that you’ve gone through!”

“That is true. I believe that I have grown. Perhaps one could say I have ‘matured.’”

“Matured? Oh ho, well,” she said slyly, taking a sip of her punch, “in that case, enjoy your ‘Bot Mitzvah.’”

Pinkie Pie’s eyes dilated. “Nooo!” she cried, dropping to the floor, causing everyone to stare at her. “That’s what I should have called it!”

The partygoers shrugged off this outburst and returned to their activities. Rarity rolled her eyes and tried to help Pinkie Pie back to her hooves.

“Pinkie Pie,” Turing began, “I am uncertain of why you chose to have this celebration for my benefit. As of yet, we have not acknowledged each other as friends.”

“Oh!” Pinkie exclaimed, standing up so suddenly that Rarity stumbled back, spilling her punch. Pinkie hooked her foreleg around Turing’s neck and began to lead her around the room. “Well, first I heard from Spike about how he and Twilight became friends with you,” she said, pointing over at Spike, who was already stuffing his face with hors d'oeuvres, “and then Rarity,” she pointed back to Rarity, who was getting up and frantically trying using several dozen napkins to clean punch off of her coat and mane, “and of course everypony heard about you and Rainbow Dash! I was helping the Cakes with a huge catering order and then I had to babysit Pound and Pumpkin, but Dashie told me all about what had been going on!”

“I see. You have been following my activities.”

“I sure have! I figured ‘The Iron Horse’ deserved a follow!”

“Analyzing… you refer to me using the nickname the newspapers gave me before my current designation of ‘Turing Test.’”

“Yep!” Pinkie Pie said, nodding. “So, I figure if so many other ponies, plus one dragon, wanted to make friends with you, then that means I should try to make friends with you too!”

“Understood. I hope we will become friends quickly.”

“Yay! Me too! I know we’re going to be best friends in no time, Rinny!”

Turing cocked her head to the side. “Please clarify: did you just call me ‘Rinny?’”

“Sure did!” Pinkie replied. “Sometimes I like to give some of my friends nicknames, so I’ll call you Rinny! See, because it’s short for Tu-RINg Test, get it?”

“I do not understand. Many ponies simply call me ‘Turing.’ Both ‘Turing’ and ‘Rinny’ are two syllable words and therefore it is no shorter.”

Pinkie sank, her eyes, smile, and even hair seeming to deflate. “Oh. You don’t like it?”

Turing tapped her head, trying her best to indicate that she was thinking it over. “My apologies. I was commenting on the value it had as a shorter name. However, the name ‘Rinny’ seems similar to other nicknames given as a sign of affection or friendliness. I do wish to engender such feelings. It is therefore satisfactory and I will accept it as a nickname. Thank you, Pinkie Pie.”

“Woohoo!” Pinkie then turned to the rest of the party-goers. “All right, everypony! How about we open some presents and then play some party games?”

The crowd cheered, parting the way for Turing to step up to the table with the gifts piled onto it.

“Go ahead, Rinny,” Pinkie said, gesturing to the pile. “Pick whichever one you want to open first!”

“Is there a procedure for choosing the first?” she asked.

“Nah,” Rainbow Dash said, hovering over the table, “just pick one that looks cool to you. Although, if you need a suggestion…” She pointed at one of the boxes tied with blue wrapping and cloud-shaped patterns. “This one is probably the awesomest.”

“Understood. Engaging U-Mode.” Turing’s horn slid into place and she levitated the box down to her. Gently, slowly, she began to unwrap the gift without ripping the paper. The process was slow and meticulous and everypony began to fidget.

“Uh, one second,” Twilight said quickly, coming in close. She whispered in Turing’s ear: “Turing, listen: for one, you should rip the paper, don’t worry about being neat. Also, make sure to say ‘Thank you’ for the gift, no matter what. It’s polite.”

The other ponies leaned in closer, wondering what Twilight had whispered to her. Twilight just chuckled, trying her best to look innocent. Turing merely nodded.

“Adjusting unwrapping procedure,” Turing said, and ripped the paper off loudly. Everypony seemed to relax and laughed as she tossed the used paper over her shoulder. “Identifying gift: it appears to be a framed photograph of the two of us at the start of our first race.”

“Yeah, somepony snapped it before we started. I tried to get a picture of us actually flying in the race,” Rainbow said, “buuuut we were going too fast, so all the photos everypony took turned out blurry.”

Turing examined the photo more closely. “Curious. I have never received a photograph depicting a significant memory.” She looked up at Rainbow Dash. “This gift is something I will value greatly,” she said. “Thank you.”

Rainbow Dash smiled, though she actually started to blush slightly. “Jeez, didn’t think it was a big deal. Open another already!”

“Ooh, ooh, Scootaloo and I made something for you too!” Sweetie Belle cried, rushing forward. She pushed a flat object wrapped haphazardly with far too much tape over to her.

Turing unwrapped it and inside she found a wooden sign with amateurly drawn pictures of Turing Test and the Cutie Mark Crusaders. The placard read: “In honor of her rescue in Frostmane Mountains, Touring Test is hereby declared BEST ROBOT PONY by the Cutie Mark Crusaders.” Sweetie Belle, Scootaloo, and Apple Bloom’s signatures were at the bottom.

“Apple Bloom helped make it too. Sorry she couldn’t come,” Scootaloo said. “She wanted to come tonight too, but Applejack said she didn’t want her to asso--ow!” That last part came as Sweetie Belle elbowed her. Twilight sighed, but kept quiet.

“You misspelled my name,” Turing remarked.

“Huh? We did?” Sweetie Belle squeaked. “Oh no! We’re sorry, we’ll fix it--” She reached for it, but Turing Test held it higher.

“You misunderstand. I only wanted to correct you should you wish to give me further placards.” She looked down at the pair of fillies. “It is kind of you to show your appreciation and I acknowledge your efforts. Thank you.”

Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo looked up at Rarity and Rainbow Dash who both smiled approvingly.

Next came Twilight’s gift, which was, naturally, a book.

“It’s a copy of the classic book Tom Sawhorse, Turing!” Twilight said. “It’s a fascinating tale of a colt’s adventures--”

Turing opened the book and flipped through it. “Analyzed. Thank you, Twilight Sparkle. It was very interesting.”

Twilight sighed. “Right. I forgot you can do that.”

“OPEN MINE NEXT, TURING!” Bulk Biceps shouted. Turing picked up what looked to be a poorly wrapped dumbbell weight. She unwrapped it to reveal that in fact it was several microfiber cloths tied around a cardboard tube to resemble a dumbbell weight.

“Well, that’s… surprising,” Twilight said.

“They’re microfiber cloths from the spa,” Bulk Biceps explained. “Rarity told me she gave you some metal polish. Use these and you won’t get scratched up!”

“Understood. Thank--”

“YOU’RE GONNA SHINE LIKE A CHAMP!” he shouted excitedly. “YOU’LL BE SO SHINY, EVERYPONY’S GONNA BE ABLE TO SEE THEMSELVES IN YOUR FLANK! YEEAAH!!”

“Thank you, Bulk Biceps,” Turing said, oblivious to everypony wincing and covering their ears. “Whenever I glance at my robodonkadonk, I will think of you.”

“THAT’S A WEIRD COMPLIMENT, BUT THANKS!”

“Well, speaking of looking better,” Rarity said, levitating a small card over to Turing, “this is my gift. Although I apologize for it not being quite ready yet.”

Turing opened the card to read it. “This is a receipt for a jeweler in Manehatten. What did you purchase, Rarity?”

“Well, since our attempts at painting you ended in that fiasco,” Rarity explained, causing Pallette Swap to clutch at his heart dramatically, “I came up with something else to help you improve your look. That jeweler will be making a pair of brooches. They’ll be gold with amethyst stones set in them. You’ll have to visit the shop in Manehatten, of course, but I’ve made arrangements so they can be welded to your body wherever you wish. I personally suggest your forelegs.”

“Oh.” Turing’s eyes momentarily shrank and her ears raised as she stared at Rarity. “Then this will be another chance for me to upgrade myself aesthetically. I will be… beautiful again?”

Rarity smiled. “Well, yes, darling, that is the idea.”

“That is something I greatly desired. Perhaps it will make me more approachable. Thank you, Rarity. I will look forward to receiving this gift.”

Rarity beamed at her proudly. Sweetie Belle hugged her as well and everypony nearby seemed to agree this was the best gift yet.

“Ohhh, I can’t stand it anymore!” Pinkie Pie exclaimed, grabbing a pink box and shoving it at her. “Open mine, Rinny!”

Turing opened the box and stared down at the object. Or rather, objects. Inside the box was an assortment of small knick-knacks.

“These objects resemble locations and buildings located in and around Ponyville. Sugar Cube Corner is among them.”

“It sure is! That one is my favorite! Do you know that when I first moved to Ponyville, I saw that it looked so much like cakes and cookies that I tried to eat the building!”

Turing looked over to Twilight at that. “Curious. Twilight Sparkle indicated that nopony would be foolish enough--”

“--to not try and eat such a delicious-looking building!” Twilight said, cutting her off loudly, a strained smile on her face. She stared long at Turing Test, hoping she got the hint. Luckily, she seemed to.

“I know, right!” Pinkie said obliviously. “Anyway, these things aren’t just little keepsakes! They’re extra-strong refrigerator magnets!”

Twilight’s brain began to process this. Turing was just ahead of her.

“That might be problematic, as I do not--”

“Oh don’t worry about not having your own fridge, Rinny! You can just wear them on yourself!” she laughed, and, without another word, stuck the Sugar Cube Corner magnet on Turing’s head.

Turing’s eyes contracted and she staggered back, losing control of her grip on the box. It upended, and launched the various cheerful magnets into the air, sticking to her face and body. The robotic mare’s head began to drift to the side and her footing became unsure and she swayed and stumbled chaotically as if intoxicated.

“Turing!” Twilight exclaimed.

“Huh? Rinny, are you--”

“--as-as-I-dddo-not plastic eyeballs, spray paint the vegetables dog food stalls with the beefcake pantyhose.” Her eyes began to flicker as she tried to shake the magnets off.

“Oh my gosh, hang on, Turing!” Twilight shouted, rushing forward.

“W-what’s wrong with her?!” Pinkie exclaimed as the other party guests looked on in confusion and horror.

One by one, Twilight began to pry the magnets off Turing. Once the last one was off, she stood up straight, her head moving only slightly.

“Jeez, Tee, are you okay?” Rainbow Dash asked, landing directly in front of her. She held up a hoof when she got no response. “Okay, Tee, how many hooves am I holding up?”

Turing stared at the hoof, her head still wobbling. “Thursday,” she replied.

“Oh my gosh, I broke her!” Pinkie cried, both front hooves flying to the side of her head in panic. “She just wanted to make friends and I broke--”

“Adjusting for memory glitches,” Turing said, her head finally becoming still. “Minor errors detected. Analyzing… errors repaired.” She looked around the room and noticed the looks of shock and concern from everyone else. “There is no need to worry. I was not permanently damaged.”

Turing went over to Pinkie Pie. “These magnets have strength sufficient to cause interference in my neural net.”

Pinkie Pie looked like she was about to cry.

“Turing!” Twilight hissed.

“Ah,” she said, remembering Twilight’s earlier advice. “Thank you for the gift. It was very thoughtful despite nearly giving me brain damage.”

***

“It’s not so bad, Pinkie,” Twilight said, putting her hoof on Pinkie’s shoulder. The two were in Pinkie Pie’s room upstairs, seated on her bed, while the party continued on the ground floor.

“I’m suh-supposed to be Ponyville’s superiest d-duperiest party pony and I nearly k-killed your robo~ot!” Pinkie wailed, hugging a pillow so hard the seams were starting to rip. “I j-just asked her if she w-wanted to be friends and she said y-yes and then I gave her a bad present and then I almost killed he~er!”

“Pinkie, it’s not so bad…”

“Yes it is!” she sobbed.

“Oh come on,” Twilight said, offering her a weak smile. “Look, it was nice present for a normal pony. You didn’t know electromagnetic energy damages Turing, so how could you know the effect those magnets would have on her?”

“Bucking magnets, how do they work?!”

“That’s…” She shook her head, ignoring the question. “Anyway, please don’t feel bad. Turing’s fine!”

“E-even if I didn’t mean to, I almost hurt poor Rinny at her own Bot Mitzvah!” She reached for a tissue and blew into it loudly. “I just wanted to make friends and have fun with her and now she probably hates meeee!”

“Pinkie, please don’t cry,” Twilight said softly while giving her a gentle hug. “Listen, I know Turing isn’t very easy to understand. Believe me, I know. But she’s never been angry before and I know she wouldn’t hate you for making a mistake like that. Besides, I think she’s enjoying herself at this party.”

Pinkie sniffled, but managed to smile hopefully. “You really think so?”

“Of course!” Twilight exclaimed, giving a firm nod. “Turing Test likes to interact with other ponies and she really likes to know that she’s appreciated. This party and the nice presents from everypony are just what she needed after... after some drama we had yesterday.”

“Then… then I’m going to make this party the best party she’s ever had!” Pinkie proclaimed, standing up on her bed, holding up one hoof as she looked defiantly at the heavens (or at least her ceiling).

“Well, she’s never had a party before so--”

“Best robot party ever!” Pinkie shouted, cutting Twilight off.

There was a coughing sound and the pair turned to the bedroom door. Spike was standing there, a look of urgency on his face. “Uh, Pinkie, sorry to say this, but we were playing musical chairs and, um…”

“What? Not enough chairs?”

“Well, not anymore,” Spike said, glancing back down the stairs behind him. “Turing is winning, but she’s pretty heavy, so when she sits down--”

The music coming from downstairs stopped and there was a crunch sound and the clattering of wood.

“Chair obliterated. You may now initiate the next round, Sweetie Belle.”

“Yeah,” Spike said. “That keeps happening.”

“Gah! Mr. and Mrs. Cake are going to kill me!” Pinkie screamed, rushing past Spike and down the stairs. “Rinny! Stop being so good at sitting down!”

***

The evening went on with relatively few problems minus Pinkie lamenting paying the Cakes back for several chairs. They tried playing a few more party games, but Turing quickly dominated anything they played. Pin the Tail on the Pony, for example, was pointless since she didn’t get dizzy and didn’t need to see to find the exact right spot to pin the tail, as she perfectly memorized the layout of the room and knew just where to place the tail. She also caught on to darts very quickly, going from missing the dart board completely to being able to throw a bullseye every single time in only two turns.

In the end, they settled on just playing some music and mingling. That held its own pitfalls as Turing Test still had problems communicating or understanding others, but everypony was fairly patient with her. Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle were especially curious.

“So, what’s it like living with Twilight?” Scootaloo asked. “Us crusaders get to spend some time with her every week, but you’re with her all the time!”

“Correction: it is not all the time. She does require sleep and has activities that do not involve me.”

“Well, sure,” Sweetie Belle said, rolling her eyes. “I mean, everypony needs their sleep.”

“I do not.”

“Huh? You don’t sleep?” Sweetie Belle asked.

“I am capable of entering sleep mode to conserve power, but it is not a vital function. Currently, I have been operational without entering sleep mode or powering down for nearly three days.”

“Wow, so you can just stay up all night! That’s awesome!” Scootaloo exclaimed, leaping into the air, her wings buzzing energetically.

“I don’t know,” Sweetie Belle said uncertainly. “I mean, sleep can be nice too. At least you get to dream.” She paused, considering that a moment. “Turing Test, what do you dream about when you go into sleep mode?”

“I do not.”

“Huh? Don’t what?”

“Clarifying: I do not dream.”

The two fillies looked at each other, then back to Turing.

“Wait, you’ve never had a dream? Ever?” Scootaloo asked.

“It is my understanding that a dream is a hallucinatory image produced by the organic mind. It is often nonsensical and at times causes feelings of extreme terror. If that is what you are referring to, then I repeat: I do not dream.”

Sweetie Belle frowned. “That’s kind of sad.”

Turing cocked her head to the side. “I do not understand. Why is it sad?”

“It just is,” Scootaloo said. “Dreams can be pretty awesome.” She looked back at her wings and sighed. “You can do anything you want.”

“Anything… that I want?” She seemed to consider that.

“Rinny!” Pinkie Pie shouted, bounding over to her. “I almost forgot! After the, um… thing with the magnets…” She laughed nervously, but then recovered her energy. “Like I was saying: I forgot about the cake! Come on over!”

Turing dutifully followed Pinkie over to where the cake stood. It was a large, three-tiered cake with gobs of purple and white frosting. Several candles adorned it.

“I wanted to make it silver-colored frosting so it would match your colors, Rinny,” Pinkie explained, “but we didn’t have enough. But anyway, time to blow out the candles! Take a deep breath!”

Turing was quiet as everypony stared at her expectantly.

“Well, come on, Rinny!”

“Pinkie,” Twilight started to say, “Turing is…”

“It is all right, Twilight Sparkle. I will explain.” She turned to Pinkie. “Pinkie Pie, as a robot, I lack lungs and am incapable of exhaling.”

Pinkie Pie gawked. “Wait, you don’t breathe?!”

“I do not. However, I believe I have a solution. Activating P-Mode.” Her wings sprouted and she turned to face away from the cake. “My jets will be more than sufficient to extinguish the flames. Please stand back everypony.”

“Turing, no, you’ll blow the whole cake off the table!” Twilight shouted, rushing forward.

“Ah. I had not considered that. Returning to neutral mode.” The wings retracted as everypony breathed a sigh of relief.

“Uh, Pinkie, you go ahead and do her the honors,” Twilight suggested.

“Okey-dokey-lokey!” Pinkie sucked in a deep breath and easily blew out all the candles in one go, earning a short round of applause. She then grabbed a cake slicer and a plate and turned back to Turing. “Which piece would you like Rinny?”

Twilight facehoofed. “Pinkie…”

“I apologize, Pinkie Pie, but I am unable to eat this cake.”

“Oh… because it’s not kosher?”

“You misunderstand. I am a robot, therefore--”

“Oh, oh, of course, I’m such a dummy!” She zipped out of the room and returned with a large can of oil. Before anypony could stop her, she popped it open and dumped the black contents all over the once appetizing cake. All the party guests gave a collective sigh even as Pinkie obliviously offered an oil-drenched slice to Turing. “There you go! Now it’s perfect!”

Turing looked down at the slice. “I believe you have misunderstood my meaning.”

Pinkie frowned, her chipper smile vanishing. “What? What’s wrong now? Too much frosting?”

“Pinkie Pie, I do not eat. I am a machine and lack a digestive system. I do not have a mouth with which I could consume the food.”

“You don’t have a mouth?!” Pinkie cried. “I thought it was under your face-plate thingy!”

“That is incorrect. I vocalize through an auditory speaker which processes my synthetic voice. I have nothing analogous to a mouth.”

“But… if you don’t have a mouth,” she said, working the idea out verbally, “then… then how do you smile?”

Turing Test’s ears twitched. “I do not smile. To clarify, I am incapable of smiling.”

Pinkie’s eyes dilated and she staggered back as if struck, those final three words echoing in her mind.

“I… I’m going to go upstairs and… and just… think about things…” She then turned around and went straight up the stairs, leaving the dead quiet party behind her. Everypony fidgeted nervously for a moment, no one sure what to say or do.

“Mmmaybe we should just call it a night,” Twilight said, putting her hoof on Turing’s shoulder.

“Very well. It is a night.”

The party guests chuckled slightly at that. Turing cocked her head to the side again as they did so. “Strange. Analyzing…”

“What’s that, Turing?” Twilight asked. “Did you say--”

“Hold on,” Rarity said, “did Pinkie Pie completely extinguish those candles before dumping the oil on it? Because if she didn’t--”

The cake burst into flames.

***

Later that night, after the party guests and firefighters had gone home, Pinkie Pie was lying awake in bed.

“She can’t… smile?” she whispered. “That’s horrible!”

Pinkie had met cranky ponies and a Cranky donkey as well as her share of party poopers and sourpusses, but all of them had at least possessed the ability to smile. But Turing Test…

I told her I wanted to be her friend. But I nearly scrambled her brain, I yelled at her for being too heavy, and then I humiliated her in front of everypony by pointing out her disabilities! And then I set her cake, the one she can’t even eat, on fire! I just wanted to make a new friend and make her smile, just like everypony else, but… but…

The tears came before she knew it and this time she was alone, no Twilight or other friends to comfort her. Turing wasn’t what she’d expected, but if several of her friends could bond with her, then she’d figured it would be easy for her to do the same. She realized now how wrong she was.

“I c-can’t just let it end like t-this,” she said to herself through her tears. She breathed in deep, drawing herself up as she wiped away her tears. “No! I’m Pinkie Pie, the best party pony in Ponyville and I know there’s something I can do to help Rinny!”

She looked at all the pictures that adorned her wall, feeling a new wave of inspiration. In so many of them, she saw the special ponies in her life, friends and family alike, their mouths opened wide in the middle of uproarious…

“Laughter.” She breathed the word and her eyes lit up. “Laughter… that’s it!”

***

Back at the castle, Twilight Sparkle finished brushing her teeth and exited the bathroom. She yawned as she moved for her bed.

“Twilight Sparkle--”

“Gah!” Twilight shouted in surprise. She caught her breath as Turing stood waiting. “Darn it, Turing, you scared the dickens out of me!”

Turing began looking around the room.

“Turing… what are you doing?” she asked narrowing her tired eyes, afraid to hear the answer.

“I am looking for your dickens so we may insert them back into you.”

“Oh Sweet Celestia…” she groaned. “Look, never mind that, what did you want?” Twilight said as she made her way to the bed, tossing back the covers.

“Twilight Sparkle, I have noticed that ponies often laugh at things.”

She nodded. “That’s true.”

“For example, you and Gadget seemed very amused last night when I attempted hyperbole and stated that my--”

“No, no, don’t say it again!” Twilight said, holding a hoof up to silence her, already trying to stifle a laugh. “I remember.”

“The point I am attempting to explain is that I often see ponies laugh together. Occasionally, this occurs as the result of something I say.”

“Oh,” Twilight said. “Well, Turing, I don’t think anypony means anything cruel by it.”

“That was not my assumption.”

She smiled. “Well, that’s a relief. But yes, Turing, I guess sometimes you do say things that are kind of funny.”

“Understood. However, I do not understand the reasoning. In short, I do not understand why such things are funny. Indeed, I have no concept of what is or is not amusing. Every time I have seen an organic pony laugh, I have failed to understand why or feel any such amusement myself.”

Twilight frowned. “And that bothers you. I see.”

“Affirmative. The emotion I felt last night remains unidentified, but I can confirm that it was a positive experience. I believe that by experiencing more positive emotions, I may be able to properly identify it and achieve a greater degree of understanding of emotional states. Furthermore, it seems that a great obstacle to making friends and having other ponies enjoy my company is my lack of a ‘sense of humor.’

“It seems that I am able to befriend others in a limited capacity. However, if I am to not only be a friend, but a good friend, then I must be able to understand others and participate in social interaction as an equal. I want to know what is humorous to others so that I may better achieve this.”

“So… well, I suppose you’re right, Turing,” Twilight said, rubbing her chin. “Hmm. I’m not sure what to do about that, though. Humor is… complicated, honestly. I don’t think I could tell you what is or isn’t funny.”

Then she smiled. “But I think I know somepony who could!”

***

The next morning, Pinkie Pie, bouncing and humming a happy tune, went right up to the castle door. “Knock knock!” she said as she knocked on the door.

The door opened and Spike stepped out. He smiled when he saw her. “Oh, Pinkie, I’m glad you’re here!”

“Me too!” she said. “Then again, I’m always glad I’m wherever I am! It’s like my Granny Pie always said: ‘Wherever you go, there you are! Unless you exist in a quantum superposition where you both are and aren’t there, a state that will remain until an outside observer witnesses you and collapses you into one condition or the other!’ Tee hee!”

Spike blinked. “I… what?”

“I’m here to see Turing!” Pinkie said excitedly.

“Oh, right, that’s what I was going to say!” Spike said, showing her inside. “Turing was about to come find you too.”

Turing Test was coming down the hall and her ears perked up upon seeing Pinkie Pie. “Pinkie Pie. I am glad that you are here.”

“Rinny!” She rushed forward and stopped in front of her, hopping up and down with sheer excitement. “I wanted to tell you that I had an idea to make up for the present I gave you last night!”

“The present was adequate. The magnets now adorn Twilight Sparkle’s refrigerator. Furthermore, I must thank you for the party. The chance for social interaction was invaluable. I received a great amount of input which…” She stopped, noticing Pinkie scrunching her face and furrowing her brow. “It was a nice party.”

“Oh!” she exclaimed. “That’s great!”

“Still, your offer is appreciated. I also have a request of you, if you are willing to listen.”

“Ooh, ooh, let me guess… you want me to replace the chairs you broke in Sugar Cube Corner with industrial strength metal chairs that won’t break under your massive weight!”

“Incorrect.” She paused. “You referred to my mass as being greater than average. Does convention not dictate that I be insulted?”

“Uhh, no!” she said quickly. “You’re not chunky, you’re just built that way!” She shook her head, trying to focus. “But anyway, I’ll tell you my present and you can tell me what you want. Maybe it’s the same thing!”

“Understood.”

“Well then, my gift is… laughter!”

Turing said nothing.

“Well, what I mean is, see, I went to bed last night, but I couldn’t concentrate because I felt sooo bad about your party! The magnets, the chairs, the food--”

“The food?”

“The food was on fire!” She gripped Turing by the shoulders. “But don’t you worry, Rinny! You may not be able to smile, but I can give you something as good, if not better… I’m going to make you laugh!”

“That is an admirable goal,” Turing said. “Perhaps it will be achieved through my request.”

“Oh?” Pinkie Pie asked.

“Your goal is to make me laugh. However, this may be difficult, as I do not understand what constitutes something funny from something that is not. If you are willing, I request that you teach me to be humorous. I wish to learn how to make others laugh.”

Pinkie Pie’s eyes lit up. “Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, oh my gosh!” she shouted, leaping into the air. “This is gonna be great! In fact, I know just how to start! I’ll teach you a joke!”

“A joke? Very well. Please proceed.”

“Okay, here goes!” She cleared her throat. “Did you hear about pony with laryngitis?”

“That is unfortunate. Is it a pony either of us know personally?”

“Huh? No, Rinny, this is the joke.”

“The health of somepony has deteriorated. I do not see how that is amusing.”

“No, no, it’s not real, it’s just… um, it’s an imaginary situation to start the joke.”

“Then how would it be possible for me to have heard about her?”

“Turing... just say ‘no’ after the question. Okay?” Pinkie Pie said, rolling her eyes.

“No.”

“No?”

“You requested that I say ‘no’ after the question. You then asked if that was okay.”

“Okay, just don’t say anything!” she snapped. She took a calming breath. “Er, sorry. Anyway, here’s the joke: Did you hear about the pony with laryngitis? She’s a little hoarse! Hee hee!”

Turing was silent.

“Well, what do you think? Anything? Do you get it?”

Turing still said nothing.

“You can talk again now, Rinny,” she sighed.

“Understood. And I do understand the meaning of your joke, though I do not understand why that joke is amusing. All ponies are, by definition, little horses.”

“Yeah, but it’s… that’s the double meaning. Like, ‘hoarse,’ as in ‘can’t talk very well.’”

“I am also familiar with that term. Was that the meaning you intended instead?”

“No, I… I meant both! That’s the joke!”

“That seems reasonable, as a pony is a small horse and the laryngitis would also make her voice harsh. Is the state of speech impairment itself funny?”

Pinkie’s eye twitched. “Ohhh boy. This is gonna be tough.”

“I am not a boy. But I concur with your assessment. Especially since Spike the Dragon seems to have found your joke extremely funny.”

Spike, who’d been watching this exchange, was indeed laughing heartily, though not at Pinkie’s joke. He got himself under control. He pat Pinkie on the shoulder. “Good luck, Pinkie Pie. You’re gonna need it.”

***

Spike walked into the study. Twilight was pacing back and forth, occasionally stopping to stare at the letter on the desk.

“Twilight?” Spike asked. “Turing left with Pinkie. She’s going to learn humor from her, just like you suggested.”

“That’s great,” Twilight said, raising her head to smile. Then her smile melted away and she glanced back at the letter. “I hope she has good luck. And I hope I do too…”

Spike nodded and he came over, hugging her leg. “I’m worried, Twilight.”

Twilight sighed. “Me too, Spike. But we both knew this was coming.”

They stared down at the letter. It was short and right to the point:

Dear Twilight,
I received your report yesterday. I need to talk to you about your automaton in person. I consider this an urgent matter. Please come to Canterlot this afternoon if you are at all able.
Sincerely yours,
Celestia

The two looked back at each other, their expressions mirroring each other’s worry. They knew this would be no laughing matter.

To be continued...

Author's Notes:

And that's 15 chapters (not counting the crackfic chapter before this)! Thanks to everyone who has helped this fic slowly gain some popularity. Extra special thanks go to ArtichokeLust who provided some technical information and was kind enough to teach me a bit about Faraday cages. I hereby grant you title of "Technical Consultant!" If anyone else cares to hit me with some technical knowledge, leave me a comment or a PM; I love learning more about this kind of stuff!

Those of you playing "spot that reference" can find the answers below (and this one has a lot!):

-The title is, of course, a play on the season one song Pinkie sings, "Giggle at the Ghosties," paired with the commonly known phrase "ghost in the machine," often referenced in sci-fi. A variation was itself used in part for the ground-breaking manga and anime "Ghost in the Shell." When I first saw the original 1995 film as a teenager, it was one of the most mind-blowing things I'd ever seen and it fueled my interest in sci-fi and cyberpunk.

-The joke "Bot Mitzvah" is from Futurama. "Shalom hunger, shalom free food!"

-Twilight's gift, "Tom Sawhorse" is a ponified version of "Tom Sawyer" of course.

-The magnet scene: Getting one's mind messed up by magnets is another nod to "Futurama," but it's grounded in reality; the gibberish Turing spouts are lyrics to the song "Loser" by Beck.

-Turing's response "Thursday" is a reference to the cartoon "Big Guy and Rusty the Boy Robot" (episode 3).

-"Bucking magnets, how do they work?" is a reference to the worst song/meme ever.

-Granny Pie's old fashioned wisdom references the quantum physics thought experiment "Schrodinger's Cat."

-"The food was on fire!" is parodying the song "Fire Water Burn" by The Bloodhound Gang.

Thank you again for reading. I'm really touched by how many have expressed their enjoyment of my work. See you next chapter!

Giggle at the Ghost in the Machine, Part 2

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“This is gonna be so fun, Rinny!” Pinkie exclaimed as the pair of them walked out from the castle. “In no time at all, I’ll have you laughing your tail off!”

“The loss of my tail would…” Turing Test paused, even slowing her pace. “You are being hyperbolic. You do not mean that I will lose my tail in actuality.”

“Right! See, you’re getting it!” Pinkie said, turning to face her excitedly.

Turing came to a full stop. “Do you genuinely believe that you will be able to teach me to be humorous, Pinkie Pie?”

“Of course,” she said, putting a hoof to her chest and raising her head. “I managed to teach Princess Luna to be funny in time for last year’s Chuckle-lot!”

“Chuckle-lot?”

“It’s canon to the comics, don’t worry about it.”

Turing tilted her head slightly.

“The point is, Rinny, that I can help anypony laugh! Anypony!”

“I am glad. Of all the functions that organic ponies demonstrate, laughter is the one I have the poorest understanding of.”

“Huh?” Pinkie asked. “What do you mean?”

“I am fairly certain that I can have experiences and responses that are emotional in nature. Sadness due to unfavorable situations. Amazement and the desire to improve in response to unexpected demonstrations of ability. Gratification for success in a difficult task. I am able to understand these things quite well.”

“Well, sure, anypony would feel like that!” Pinkie said, rolling her eyes. “Why wouldn’t they?”

“That is my point. Laughter seems to be a common physiological and emotional response that serves a key function in socialization. However, it also induces spastic loss of control of one’s breathing patterns and significant motor impairment even to the point of discomfort. It is very strange to me, and yet humor seems to be something all ponies enjoy. And while variations exist, all ponies appear to have a ‘sense of humor,’ if my data on the subject is correct. I wish to know if I do as well.”

“Well, I think everypony can laugh, so you must have a sense of humor!” she said cheerfully. “What kind of things do you think are funny, Rinny?”

“That is what I am attempting to explain, Pinkie Pie. I do not think anything is funny. As I stated earlier, I am unable to distinguish something that is funny from something that is not. In 100% of the occasions where I have seen a pony laugh, I have failed to understand why they were laughing.”

Pinkie shook her head, rubbing her temple. “Wait… you mean you’ve never ever gotten the joke? Every single time somepony laughed?!”

“Correct. I have never found anything humorous. I wish you to teach such things to me.”

“This is more serious than I thought!” Pinkie exclaimed. “We need to get you laughing, stat!”

“Agreed. And my name is not Stat.”

Pinkie giggled at that.

“You are laughing again. Can you explain why?”

“Oh, I thought… I thought you were joking.” She said, her smile fading.

“I was not.”

“Too bad. That was actually kind of funny.”

Turing tilted her head. “But why?”

“Well, because you thought I called you ‘Stat,’ when, you know, I just meant we should try to get you to laugh quickly.”

“Understood. Past experience indicates that my misunderstandings are often a source of amusement. I would prefer to be funny intentionally.”

“Well, let’s start with just practicing laughing. Maybe you just need to try it out!”

Turing tapped the side of her head, contemplating the idea. “That may work. Perhaps if I can simulate the physiological response, then the emotional response will occur in turn.”

“Then let’s start. Okay… let me think, something funny, something funny…” She stuck her tongue out and squinted her eyes. “Oh, I know! Gummy ate my soap yesterday and he got the hiccups and every - heehee -every time he did, bu-bubbles came out of his nose! Pffthahahahahaha!”

She guffawed, collapsing to the ground and holding her belly, occasionally snorting as she did. “Oh wow, that was sooo funny, you should have seen it!”

Turing stood there silently.

“Okay, Rinny, now you try it!” Pinkie managed to gasp. “Now remember, you shouldn’t try to copy my laugh. You should laugh your own way! Everypony’s laugh is unique and beautiful!”

“Very well,” she said. “I will now attempt laughter.”

Pinkie leaned forward, eager to hear Turing’s attempt.

“Ha.”

Pinkie blinked several times. “Ummm like I said… everypony’s laugh is unique and, um, occasionally beautiful!”

She looked to Pinkie, cocking her head at her frank evaluation. “Understood. My attempt was not satisfactory. Perhaps repetition is necessary.”

“Rinny--”

“Ha. Ha. Ha.” She continued in this manner, giving a punctuated, staccato laugh that was devoid of variation or melody.

“Rinny, you sound like you’re being sarcastic!” Pinkie said, folding her forelegs and shaking her head. “Come on, a real laugh can’t sound like you’re hitting the same note on a piano!”

“Understood. I will attempt some variation.” She paused, twitching her ears. “Beginning variational laughter: Ha HA. Ha HEE ha ha. Ha ha HO HO tee hee. Chortle. Snort. Ha--”

She stopped when she saw Pinkie staring back at her and shaking her head. Her face was scrunched and she held her head back as she looked askance at her. “No. No, Rinny, stop.”

“I believe I may be close to emulating--”

“No.” She put her hoof up and narrowed her eyes. “Trust me, that’s not working. That’s actually kinda horrifying.”

“Understood.” She lowered her ears. “I am sorry if my attempt was unsatisfactory.”

Pinkie sighed, but managed to perk herself back up. “That’s okay. Maybe I just need to teach you about what ponies find funny!” Bubbling with renewed energy, she seized her shoulders. “If trying to laugh isn’t working, then maybe then you could laugh naturally, the good old-fashioned way!”

“That seems reasonable. How shall we proceed?”

“First, let’s go to the market!” Pinkie exclaimed, bouncing off in her usual way. “Come this way!”

“Complying.”

Pinkie’s bouncing was cut short when she heard several earth-shaking, clattering thumps behind her. Nearly losing her footing, she whirled around and saw Turing was mimicking her bouncing, each time smashing into the ground with her massive weight and creating a series of hoof-shaped craters with each bounce.

“Augh! Rinny, stop, you’re going to make everypony think there’s an earthquake!”

***

“...And that, Princess Celestia, concludes my argument on behalf of Turing Test!” Twilight let out a deep breath, smiling in satisfaction. “So, what do you think?”

“I think you should know better than to question my authority Twilight Sparkle! Now go back to your castle, young lady, or I’ll send you to Magic Kindergarten! And need I remind you that I will expect your macaroni portraits of me to be perfect!”

Twilight glared. “Can you please try to be serious, Spike?”

The little purple dragon was standing atop a stack of books that had been placed on a stool to give the impression of standing over her. He wore a crude, homemade cardboard crown on his head and had a sun-shaped sticker on his thigh and he was speaking in falsetto.

“Sorry, Twilight.” He sat down, though still at the top of the tower of books. “Look, your arguments were great! I think you’ve really got a chance at convincing Celestia.”

“But what if it’s not good enough?!” she cried. “Spike, I have to do my best today or Celestia might decide to take Turing away! Do you want that?”

He turned somber then. “No,” he said quietly. “I’d hate that.”

She sighed. “I just don’t know what she’s going to say. And what if I lose my nerve? Oh, why did we send her that letter?!”

“I think she would have been more worried if you just ignored her, Twilight,” he replied.

“Yes, of course, but still…” She covered her face with both hooves. “I’ve never done anything like this. If she orders me to give over Turing, then I’ll…”

“You’ll what?”

“I’ll…” she paused and took a deep breath. “I’ll remember that Turing Test is counting on me to defend her right to stay with us. And I’ll remember that you and the rest of her friends are too.” She smiled. “Right. That’s what I’ll do.”

Spike smiled. “Glad to hear it, Twilight.” The two of them embraced each other.

“And now that I’ve convinced myself,” Twilight added, “I just have to convince Celestia this afternoon.”

***

Turing Test found herself in the middle of the market district. She’d been there less than a week ago, and yet something now seemed different.

The other ponies were still staring at her as they passed by, and indeed many of them still steered clear of her and hurried their children along. And yet…

Statistical analysis complete: number of negative reactions has decreased by 22%. Neutral reactions have increased by 8%. Positive reactions have increased by 14%. Margin of error is 4%.

The reactions were still fairly negative. Fearful, gawking, untrusting. But now far more of them either simply acknowledged her with no notable reaction and many even smiled and waved as they passed.

“Rinny!” Pinkie Pie exclaimed, rushing back to her from wherever she’d gone. Then she tilted her head, raising an eyebrow when saw Turing was rapidly swiveling her head to look at various passersby.

“Welcome back, Pinkie Pie.”

“Whatcha doin, Rinny?” she asked.

“I have noticed that many ponies in the crowd seem to be treating me with less hostility than anticipated.” She paused and raised her hoof, waving slightly at a mare who trotted by. The mare looked at her in confusion for a moment, but then returned the wave with a grin. She turned back to Pinkie Pie. “That mare who just waved at me actively avoided looking at me or being within several meters of my vicinity a week ago. It seems I am becoming more socially accepted.”

“That’s great!” Pinkie exclaimed, throwing her forehooves up elatedly. “It must be because everypony knows you’re actually super nice!”

“Hypothesizing: reactions may be due to ponies becoming more familiar with this unit.” She paused. “Another contributing factor would be previous positive reactions resulting from interactions with Rarity, Rainbow Dash, and Twilight Sparkle.”

“I’m so happy for you, Rinny!” Pinkie beamed and wrapped her forelegs around her.

“Hug initiated.” Turing returned the hug. “Hug complete.”

“And if you think you’re making new friends now,” Pinkie added, looking her in the eyes with a knowing grin, “then just wait until I teach you all. About. Being. Funny!” She poked her firmly in the chest on each word for emphasis.

“That sounds intriguing.” She looked down at Pinkie’s hoof as it was poking her in the chest. She then raised her own hoof and began poking Pinkie’s chest in response. “I hope. Your. Hypothesis. Is. Correct.”

Pinkie winced and rubbed her chest. “Ow.”

“I am curious as to why we came to this place, Pinkie Pie. What did you acquire?”

“Oh, right!”

She reached into her hair, far deeper than the poofy mane should allow if Turing’s sensor readings were correct. Finally, Pinkie removed something and held it out, grinning broadly as she did so. The object she held up, balancing on her hoof, was slender, curving, and yellow with small brown speckles on its soft skin.

“That is a banana, Pinkie Pie,” Turing said, though she was at that point more curious about the apparent spacial anomaly in Pinkie’s mane.

“Well duh, I know that, silly!” she said, giggling at the obvious statement. “But this is just what we need!”

“I do not require nutrition.”

“Nope! But we don’t need the inside of it.” She peeled the banana, squeezing it from the bottom, and shooting it into the air, then caught it in her mouth, swallowing it. “We only want the peel!”

She tossed it a few meters away.

“First lesson of comedy: ponies are used to things being a certain way, but getting them out of what they’re used to is funny!”

Turing looked over at the banana peel. “I do not understand.”

“You will! Today I’ll teach you the art of - pause for dramatic effect - the Pratfall!”

Turing cocked her head to the side. “I still do not understand.”

“It’s easy! You won’t get hurt for real, so this is perfect! Go over to that banana peel,” she said, leaning in and staring at her intensely, “and slip on it!”

Turing looked to Pinkie Pie and then to the banana peel and back. “You wish for me to tread upon the peel and lose my balance? How will that be funny?”

“Trust me,” Pinkie said, patting her on the shoulder. “Just go over there and slip. And really throw yourself into it, don’t worry about being careful!”

“Very well. Initiating slip.” She walked over to the peel, trotting quickly. With precise motion, she stepped squarely on the peel and her hoof slid out from under her. Her momentum was such that she actually flipped forward, head over heels.

The crowd of shoppers nearby stopped and stared at the scene unfolding before them.

Pinkie Pie watched. Oh my gosh, this is gonna be the best pratfall ever!

Turing was in midair when her systems kicked in: Initiating rebalancing. Compensating for gravity and momentum.

Turing jerked her body around and flipped over in a complete circle, landing squarely on her hooves. “Slip completed.”

The ponies nearby all applauded, cheering and stomping their hooves, impressed with her perfect landing.

“Augh, no, that’s not right!” Pinkie cried, trotting over to her. “Rinny, that’s not how you pratfall!”

“My actions were in error? What have I done incorrectly?”

Pinkie walked just past her and pointed down at the peel. “After you slip, you’re supposed to fall!”

“Understood.”

She then promptly fell, tipping over and landing on her side… and right onto Pinkie’s tail.

Pinkie was pulled back slightly as Turing’s weight caught most of the poofy pink mass and pinned it beneath her. It didn’t hurt, but it was pulling Pinkie’s hindquarters down into a half-sitting position. She rolled her eyes and heaved a sigh. “No, I mean you’re supposed to fall after you slip on the banana peel.”

The crowd of bystanders was getting larger. She chuckled and waved nervously. “Rinny, please get up,” she hissed through her gritted teeth.

“Very well.” She stood, but as she did so, it was clear that several long strands of hair from Pinkie’s tail were caught on various screws and the edges of her hull. "Tail has become entangled. Attempting extrication." She backed away, yanking the hair, the tail, and the owner of said tail with her.

“Owowow, my tail!” Pinkie cried as she was yanked off her hind legs. She dug her hooves into the ground to keep from being dragged. “Knock it off, Rinny!”

“You wish for me to knock your tail off?” Turing raised a metal hoof.

“No!” she screeched, wide-eyed and holding her hooves out in panic. She then clutched her tail protectively.

The crowd’s light chuckles grew and several ponies elbowed each other and waved over more friends to watch the scene as it unfolded.

“Just hold on,” Pinkie told her. She seized her tail with both hooves and began to pull backwards, mightily yanking while standing on her hind legs, her eyes closed and teeth grit as if pulling up a stubborn weed. "Why! Won't! It! Come! Loose?!" She heard the crowd laughing even louder and she opened her eyes to see Turing had also seized her tail, preventing her from freeing it.

“Rinnyyyy, why are you doing that?!” she demanded.

“You told me to 'just hold on.'”

“Well let go!” she shouted, continuing to yank.

“Understood.” She let go and Pinkie’s momentum, now unhindered, instantly caused her to topple backwards, snapping the strands of hair as she fell flat on her back. "Oww..."

The crowd’s light chuckles and mild amusement turned into a chorus of uproarious and insane gibbering. Several fell to the ground, tears rolling down their faces even as Pinkie stood, rubbing her abused hindquarters.

In spite of her embarrassment, she smiled and turned to her mechanical companion. “Well, it wasn’t what I had in mind, but we still got a big laugh out of everypony.”

There was a metallic sound and Turing looked down to see several of the ponies had even tossed bits at them, a few of which had tumbled into her brass hooves.

“We appear to have been successful. Ponies did indeed laugh. However...”

Pinkie bounced over to her, her big blue eyes wide and her smile broad. “What is it, Rinny? You made everypony laugh like you wanted, right?”

“That is true. However,” she paused, deliberately scratching her head, “I am confused. This was not intentional and it again resulted from my misunderstanding.”

Pinkie stopped bouncing, her smile fading away. “Yeah, but--”

“Furthermore, you were the object of their laughter, rather than I.”

Pinkie’s ears drooped. “Well, sure, but--”

“Also, I am puzzled. Laughter is an expression of delight, and yet this laughter seems to have occurred as the result of your pain and embarrassment. This seems less like something fun and more like cruelty.”

“It’s not cruel,” Pinkie said, shifting her eyes left and right uncomfortably. She leaned in closer to speak more softly. “It’s just… you know, a little harmless fun! Those other ponies weren’t being mean, they thought we were just acting! We even made a few bits! I didn’t get hurt badly and, besides, that’s what physical comedy’s all about!” She offered a weak smile. “Getting ponies out of their comfort zone, putting them a little off balance… that’s actually pretty funny!”

Turing tilted her head to the left and to the right. Then she looked down to where the banana peel was still lying. Finally, she turned her head back to Pinkie.

“I do not understand. The suffering of another for the amusement of onlookers does not seem to match with my goal of becoming friends. I neither wish to inflict harm, nor subject myself to ridicule. I wish to find another way to make others laugh.”

PInkie sighed, but held up a hoof and smiled as she did so. “Okay, Rinny,” she said with resignation. “I get it. Physical comedy isn’t your thing. Let’s just…”

She suddenly froze, her eyes going wide. “Wait a minute. Oh my gosh, I forgot, I told the Cakes I’d help them today! What time is it?” She searched around frantically. “Does anypony have a watch?!”

“In a manner of speaking, I am a watch. It is 11:08 AM.”

“Oh no, I’m gonna be late!” She began to gallop toward the Sugar Cube Corner. Turing ran after her and quickly caught up.

“Does this mean that our lessons will be postponed?”

“Maybe for a just a little while. I’m really sorry, but I need to work some overtime today to pay for those chairs that you… um, I mean the chairs that broke last night.”

“Ah.” Turing nodded, keeping pace with Pinkie. “Understood. Then I will also offer my assistance.”

“Rinny, you don’t have to do that,” she said, turning her head to her as she ran.

“I believe it to be the appropriate action. I was responsible for their destruction. I will assist you in order to compensate the Cakes for their property.”

Pinkie smiled. “Thanks, Rinny. And hey, that means I get to teach you about comedy and about baking!

***

Striding down the hall of one of the many buildings in Manehatten bearing his name, Cornelius Vanderbull made his way to a pair of double doors. He glanced over at the sign next to it:

Gadgette F. Giroux

Executive Assistant/Engineer.

He pushed the door open and swept into the room. The floor was hard concrete and the walls were bare brick. Large windows would have let more light in had they not been blocked with various bits of machinery and cabinets. Blueprints were stuck to one wall and various equations and other drawings were scribbled on the chalkboard. The various tables were littered with gears, wires, tools, batteries, and dozens of schematics.

The main desk nearby the door was practically hidden behind a virtual fortress of books and stacks of documents. He could see the movement of several mechanical arms working and moving several objects around as he approached the desk.

“Gadget?” he asked.

The girl shoved her wheeled swivel chair out from the desk and rolled into clear view.

“Hello sir!” she said, her momentum carrying her right past him. She reached with one of her hands and grabbed a nearby table to stop herself. “Do you need me?”

“We do have a meeting this afternoon, but that can wait. Since I’ve finished the morning’s work, I thought I’d check on your progress with our other project.”

She nodded. “Of course, Commodore.” She hopped off the chair and led him over to table with the spell card Fine Print had used on her. She picked it up and held it up to him. The innards of it were lined with tiny intricate patterns and he had to adjust his spectacles as he looked at them more closely.

“These things… such intricate, tiny circuits.” He drew in a breath sharply. “This is beyond what I was expecting. And you believe this is the sort of machinery that makes the automaton, er, Turing Test work?”

“That seems likely,” Gadget replied. She held up a magnifying glass. “I’ve checked it thoroughly and it’s even more impressive up close. But the thing is, even though it is so complex and advanced, it only really does one thing. It casts a spell and that’s it. Compared to Turing Test, it’s nothing special.”

Vanderbull shrugged. “Even so, a machine that can cast an advanced spell without a caster’s aid... I never thought such a thing could be achieved.” He hesitated for a moment before adding, “I’ve often wondered what it would be like to have magical powers myself. It seems somepony has discovered a way to bring magic to the masses.”

“Since this is the first anypony’s heard of it, I wouldn’t call it ‘for the masses,’” Gadget retorted, making a face at the card. She set it down. “The only reason I haven’t made the Point Dexter widely available is because it takes so long to fine-tune it to a single pony’s unique physiology. If I ever make it universal - and a heck of a lot more affordable - I’ll make sure anypony who wants an extra set of hands can have them!”

“Then it seems that perhaps the creators of this nasty little device are not as high-minded as you, my dear.”

She chuckled, rubbing the back of her neck. “Well, I-I’m not really ‘high-minded,’ sir, I’m just doing what any good scientist would do.” She regained her composure and looked up at him. “But you’re right, sir. The ones who made this are probably keeping the technology to themselves so they can keep using it for weaponry.” She shuddered. “Being able to arm anypony they wished with offensive spells and teleportation… that’s really scary.”

“It worries me as well. It begs the question: just what did Princess Twilight run afoul of?”

“But there is good news, sir!” she exclaimed. She held up the small glass vial that had been attached to the spell card. “This vial still has trace amounts of thaumatrium in it. Thanks to Twilight Sparkle’s help, I’ve been researching how it’s made and, more importantly, who could make it.”

“Ah, so you believe it could lead to discovering Turing Test’s creators?”

“It might!” she cried excitedly. “As you know, I’ve already been doing research on where her other components might have come from. Refineries, clockwork manufacturers, machinists, automaton enthusiasts, not to mention who could pay for all that stuff. But now I can add thaumatrium manufacturers to the list of things to investigate! This could end up being a huge break for us!” She jittered, too excited to stand still. “Ooh, this stuff is so cool! And I’m even going to see if I can get Dr. Talon Turing in Trottingham to look at the card!”

He smiled. As usual, she isn’t hiding her enthusiasm. The girl is positively electrified.

He frowned at that last thought.

“Sir?” she asked, noticing his sudden change in mood. “Are you all right?”

“I… yes, I am. I just… well, Gadget, I must admit that when I read your full report that said you were attacked and nearly electrocuted by this ‘Fine Print’ fellow, I was absolutely horrified.” He turned away, refusing to look at her.

“Oh.” She looked down. “Are you mad at me for putting myself in danger?”

“What? Oh, no, no, you did nothing wrong!” he exclaimed, turning back to face her. “I… oh, blast it all.”

He knelt down and embraced the girl, surprising her enough that she momentarily flinched, but then relaxed.

“S-sir? I’m touched and all, but… are you all right?”

“No.” He steadied himself on one knee looking at her. “I was horrified at the thought that someone had attacked you and I was not there to protect you as I promised your parents I would. Someone hurt you. My own assistant. My protege. My good friend.”

She gasped. “Oh. Sir, you’ve… you’ve never called me that before.”

“I know, it is quite unprofessional of me,” he said quietly. “My apologies.”

“No, it’s just… surprising.” She returned the hug. “Thank you sir. I consider you my friend as well.”

He released her and stood up. “I’m glad.” He coughed, smoothing his coat.

She couldn’t help but smile. He’s embarrassed, she realized. Poor Mr. Vanderbull just isn’t used to showing that much sentiment.

“Gadget, you are one of my most valued employees,” he said. “But more than that, you bring a little light into this aging old bull’s life. However, you were hurt because you were involved in this fiasco. I am grateful it was not worse, but it certainly could have been. Whoever we are dealing with may have far worse things in store. And we have placed ourselves in opposition to them.”

She nodded slowly. “I see. You’re worried about my safety.”

“Yes. I always worry for the safety of those dear to me.”

Gadget’s smile broadened. “Understood, Mr. Vanderbull. I’ll be careful. But please, please don’t blame yourself, sir. I took on this assignment and it was my own interests that led me here. You didn’t put me in danger. I just wandered into it. After all, how could it have been your fault,” she added slyly, raising her eyebrow, “when it happened on my day off?”

They both chuckled at that. “Very well,” Vanderbull said. “I suppose you are right. But, just the same, notify me if you see or hear anything suspicious. I am not without my own means of protection. And nor are you, judging by the way you described thrashing about the lad.” He smiled, but then a thought occurred to him. “Though, now that I think about it, you are not normally a violent pony. Was there some personal grudge you had with him?”

She turned away, her cheeks reddening.

“Ah. Well, nevermind then.” He nodded to her. “Please continue your work, my dear. Keep me apprised as much as you can. I’d like daily reports on anything you find.”

She saluted, regaining her smile. “Will do, Commodore.”

***

“How are those cupcakes coming, Pinkie?” Mrs. Cake asked.

“Just a few more minutes, Mrs. Cake!” Pinkie called, shouting from the kitchen. She was busily mixing a fresh bowl of chocolate cake batter. Turing was at her side, kneading a mass of dough that would eventually become jam-filled buns.

“You may inform her that the cupcakes will be taken out in 2 minutes and 24 seconds, Pinkie Pie,” Turing said.

“You’re even better than an egg timer, Rinny!” Pinkie said. “We’re getting so much work done today that Mrs. Cake said I probably won’t need to do any more overtime this week to pay for the chairs!”

“I am glad that I have helped improve efficiency.” She turned over the dough and examined it carefully. “The dough has been kneaded to proper consistency. I will now allow it to rise.” She turned and saw Pinkie tasting some of the batter with a spoon. Pinkie made a face and reached for a bag of sugar, but Turing went over and placed her hoof on hers, stopping her.

“Rinny? Is something wrong?”

“You should not add more sugar, Pinkie Pie. I have scanned the recipe book and this recipe called for 2 cups of sugar. I added precisely that amount to the dry ingredients. Adding more sugar will deviate from the recipe.”

“Oh, Rinny!” Pinkie laughed. “Recipes are more like suggestions than rules! I’m just going to add a little more. Plus some extra buttermilk. Ooh, and maybe some coffee to give it some zing!”

“The recipe does not require zing. By deviating from the recipe, you may ruin the cake.”

“I won’t,” Pinkie said, growing serious. “I know the cake will be better.”

“How are you able to determine that?”

“Because I… well, I just do! I’ve made and eaten plenty of cakes before, so I know what works and what doesn't! And I think this cake needs more sugar and buttermilk.”

“You are certain?” She looked back at the batter. “I do not wish for you to upset your employers.”

“Mr. and Mrs. Cake trust me to do my best! Some of my ideas are so good, they changed their recipes!”

Turing backed away and let Pinkie add the sugar.

“You must have exceptional baking skills to impress Carrot Cake and Cup Cake.”

“I’m not an expert like they are, but I know what tastes good!” she laughed.

Turing watched her continue to mix. “Taste good,” she echoed. “That is something else I am curious about. I have never tasted anything. In all likelihood, I will never taste anything.”

Pinkie stopped mixing momentarily. She began again, and whispered, “Yeah, I realized that last night. That’s kind of sad, Rinny.”

“I apologize, Pinkie Pie. I did not mean to ruin your mood. I only wished to--” She stopped and turned to the oven, opening it and removing the tray of cupcakes. She immediately put in another tray. “--comment on my own inability to taste things.”

“That really is too bad. Snacking on things is awesome!” She tasted the batter again, nodding to herself. “Oh yeah, this is gonna be gooood!”

“I should specify. I do not envy organics’ need to eat. In truth, the consumption of food seems odd to me.”

“Wait wait wait… you mean eating is weird to you?”

“Affirmative. Organics require nutrition to survive, so they find things which contain nutrients, use their mandibles to mash the material to a consistency that their systems can digest more easily, and then process with a series of highly specialized organs, only to excrete--”

“Ew, Rinny, we’re baking!” she said, making a face. “I don’t wanna think about that!”

“That is another odd thing. Palatability and appetite can be affected by one’s mental state. And often the consumption of foods of low nutritional value is favored over more nutritional food. Generally, taste is a determining factor. Indeed, many ponies seem to enjoy the act of consumption. It is all very difficult for me to understand. Should it not be the other way around?”

“Hey, I just make the cakes tasty, I don’t ask why they’re that way,” Pinkie said as she finished pouring the batter into a pan.

“‘Tasty.’ It appears to be a wonderful experience.”

“It is! There are all kinds of yummy things.” She looked down at the cake batter and inhaled, enjoying the sweet, chocolatey aroma and trying not to drool.

“I cannot comprehend what is ‘yummy.’ I wonder… what is sweet? Or spicy? Or salty? These are just words to me.”

Pinkie stopped mixing again. She went over to Turing, her eyes practically swimming. “I’m sorry, Rinny. Do you want to leave? I don’t want you to feel like you have to be around all this food.” She gestured to all the pastries. Ears back, head lowered, she added, “I understand if you don’t want to hear me talk about it.”

“On the contrary. It is providing me with input about various flavors, which is valuable information. Even if tasting is something I may never experience for myself or fully understand, learning what other ponies enjoy may allow me to better understand organic ponies and make friends with them. It is for those same reasons that I wish to learn humor: I wish to understand you and others like you, Pinkie Pie.”

“Aww, that’s really sweet, Rinny!” Pinkie said, embracing her suddenly. Then she stood bolt upright on her hind legs. “Oh, that’s right! While we’re baking, I’ll teach you some jokes!”

“Understood. I am ready to learn.”

“Okay, we’ll start with an easy one: Knock knock!”

Turing was silent.

“You have to say ‘Who’s there?’ Rinny.”

“That will not be necessary. I know you are there.” Turing waved her hoof dismissively, hoping it looked natural.

Pinkie took a deep breath and sat down as she attempted to explain what she meant. “Okay, you see, this joke works like this: I say ‘Knock knock,’ you say ‘Who’s there?’ then I say something, and you say what I just said and then add ‘who?’ and then I say the funny part!”

“It is a joke that requires my participation. Understood. Please proceed.”

“Okay, here goes: Knock knock!”

“Who is there?”

“Boo.”

“Boo who?”

“Don’t cry, it’s just me! Tee hee!”

Turing was quiet for a moment. “My original assertion was that I knew it was you who was there, Pinkie Pie, but you insisted it was not. Why did you mislead me?”

Pinkie rolled her eyes. “No, no, see, the joke is that it sounds like you said ‘Boo hoo,’ like you were crying. So--”

“So the humor is derived from mocking my inability as a robot to cry?” Turing lowered her head, ears squeaking as they drooped as well.

“No, Rinny! I didn’t mean it that way!” she cried hurriedly. She put her hoof on her shoulder again. “It’s just a play on words, I would never make fun of you like that!” She offered her a warm smile.

“Understood. I am glad.”

“Okay, maybe that’s not your type of joke. Let’s try another. Hmm, easy ones, easy ones… all right, why was Six afraid of Seven?”

“I cannot say. As a number or an unspecified quantity of something, Six would lack emotional responses. Furthermore, as an intellectual concept rather than an entity, it would not have a survival instinct--”

“Rinny, Rinny,” Pinkie sighed, “that’s… let me try another.”

“Understood. You may proceed.”

“Okay, how about this one?” She took a deep breath. “A stallion walks into a malt shop carrying some asphalt. He says to the mare behind the counter, ‘Hey, I’d like a malt please, and one for the road!’”

Turing was very quiet. Pinkie waited, thinking maybe she’d finally told something she’d understood.

“So,” Turing said slowly, “the stallion desired to drink a malt.”

“Yes,” Pinkie said, nodding slowly.

“He then asked for a second, using the colloquialism ‘for the road,’ indicating that he would take the second malt with him when he left.”

“Yeeesss,” Pinkie Pie said, tensing up. Oh gosh, she’s getting it! She’s almost got it!

“And he was holding a chunk of the road with him when he placed his order.”

Pinkie Pie nodded, teeth grit, the vein in her head bulging. She’s… almost… there…!

“So, logically,” Turing said, pausing to rub her chin, “the stallion encountered a pothole.”

Pinkie froze. “What.”

“He encountered a pothole and wished to take the dislodged piece of asphalt to the necessary authorities.”

“Rinny…”

“Before doing so, he wished to sate his thirst with a malt. He thus ordered one to enjoy and another as he continued his journey to report the pothole.” Turing’s ears perked up. “Then perhaps the humor derives from delight at the stallion’s civic-mindedness. Correct?”

Pinkie groaned and slumped to the floor. “Rinny, some ponies know how to kill a joke. You, on the other hoof, don’t just kill jokes: you kill ‘em, stuff ‘em in a bag, and then hide the body where it will never be found.”

Turing turned her eyes off and on rapidly, simulating a blink. “It seems I have failed to understand the joke.” She rubbed her chin contemplatively. “Perhaps I require more input…”

“Pinkie, and um, Turing Test?” Mrs. Cake called. “Can you come out here and help? I need a few moments to help a customer!”

“Will do, Mrs. Cake!” Pinkie exclaimed as she got to her hooves, glad to have something else to do than explain jokes to a robot. “Come on, Rinny!”

“Understood.”

The two of them went out to the front room and found Mrs. Cake behind the counter. She was quickly retrieving several pastries and boxing them up individually.

“Pinkie, Turing, would you two please take orders? This lunch crowd is getting bigger, we have a waitress out sick today, and Mr. Cake is at home taking care of Pound and Pumpkin. They’re a little fussy today!”

“Righty-O, Mrs. Cake!”

Turing turned to Pinkie as she said that, and then back to Mrs. Cake. “Righty-O, Mrs. Cake.”

Mrs. Cake gave a bemused expression and then continued taking her order from her customer.

Pinkie was already over at a table talking to a couple of ponies, so Turing went to a nearby table where she saw a stallion sitting by himself.

“Hello, sir,” she said. “Do you require sustenance?”

The stallion raised his head from the menu with a start at the sound of Turing’s artificial voice. “Huh? Oh, wait, you’re that, um… that thing, starts with an R…”

“I am Turing Test. That starts with a T. In fact, it is fully spelled T-U-R-I…”

“No, not that, the other thing. Ro… ro…”

“Understood. The word is ‘robot.’”

“Oh, right! That’s--”

“It is spelled R-O-B…”

“I’m not really interested in spelling it,” the stallion said irritably. “Um, so, you’re working as a waiter today?”

“As I identify as female, the term waitress may be more appropriate. Though the gender-neutral term ‘server’ is also acceptable.”

He sighed. “Uh, look, I’m having trouble deciding what to eat. What do you recommend?”

“I do not understand. Please clarify.”

“I… I mean, what’s good?”

“As I lack the ability to taste or eat things, I am unqualified to make an assessment. Many ponies seem to find the food here to be palatable. I have no doubt that one of the items will be pleasing upon insertion into your oral cavity.”

He shifted his eyes back and forth and looked over his shoulder, wondering to himself if this was some sort of elaborate prank. “You know, maybe I should just come back later…” He pushed out his chair and began to stand up.

“Rinny!” Pinkie said, rushing to her side. “Hang on, sir! I’m sure we have something you’d like! Do you want something sweet or maybe a nice sandwich?”

“Oh!” he said, happy to have a non-robotic waitress. “Um, I guess a sandwich sounds good.”

“We’ve got a great one called ‘The San Franciscolt!’ It’s made with sourdough, tomatoes, cheese, and some fresh, yummy alfalfa sprouts!”

“Mm, that sounds pretty good!” He smiled. “Okay, I’ll take one!”

“Yes sir!” She looked to Turing. “Tell you what, Rinny; I’ll take the other orders. Why don’t you see if you can prepare the food.” She gave her a list of orders from the other customers. Amazingly, she had already talked to almost everypony else in the place before Turing had even managed to take a single order.

“Understood. I will proceed quickly.”

True to her word, she rushed to the kitchen, grabbing up pastries, bagels, and other things and quickly ferrying them out to customers, one by one. She also made the San Franciscolt sandwich for her original customer and brought it over to him.

“Here is your order, sir. I apologize for my earlier ineptitude.”

“Oh,” he said, a little surprised by her apology, “no, it’s fine, really. Thanks for the sandwich.” He took a bite. “Mm… mmm!” He smiled and took another ravenous bite. Then he looked up to see Turing leaning in, watching him as he chewed.

“Fascinating.”

“Um… could you not do that?” he asked, swallowing.

“Oh. I am making you uncomfortable. I apologize, sir.”

She was about to walk away when the stallion said, “No, it’s okay. So, um, you’re just helping out around Sugar Cube Corner?”

“Correct. Though my main goal today is to learn to be humorous.”

“You mean, like… telling jokes?” He raised an eyebrow.

“That is one of our activities. I do not seem to be very good at it.”

“Oh, well… maybe you could try one on me,” he said, taking a bite of his sandwich. “I’ve got a pretty good sense of humor.”

“That may be a good idea. I have yet to understand a joke, but perhaps by telling a joke, I may elicit your laughter. Causing others to laugh is a goal of mine.”

“Well, uh, go for it.”

“One moment please. I need to consult my teacher.”

She trotted back to the kitchen, where Pinkie was preparing more pastries.

“What’s going on, Rinny?”

“A customer wishes for me to tell him a joke. What joke should I tell him?”

“Oh, um… umm… ummmm… jeez, I can never think of a joke on demand! Ooh, I know, I have some joke books upstairs in my room! You can go up there, read one really quick, then come back down here and tell him one!”

“Understood. I will do so.”

She rushed upstairs and quickly located Pinkie’s room. She went to Pinkie’s room and found her bookcase. There were indeed several books related to humor, but she wasn’t sure which one to select. Deciding to simply select one, she pulled the shortest one off the shelf and scanned it. “Jokes acquired. Selecting joke at random…”

“Rinny, did you find it?” Pinkie called.

“I did. I am returning,” she called back. She rushed down the stairs and back to the stallion who was still enjoying his sandwich.

“Oh. You’re back.” He eyed her suspiciously. “So, um, do you have a joke?”

“I do. I hope it will be amusing.”

This curious scene attracted the attention of a few others. Pinkie Pie was standing nearby, eagerly awaiting Turing’s joke.

“I do not understand this joke myself, but perhaps you will be amused: What has brown coloration and has a sound resembling that of a bell?”

The stallion shrugged. “I don’t know. What?”

“Feces.”

He dropped his sandwich, looking ready to spit out the food that was in his mouth.

“You may now laugh.”

“I… I’m sorry, what did you say?”

“You need not apologize. Perhaps I was not clear enough. I was referring to fecal matter, which is--”

“Rinny, oh sweet Celestia, stop!” Pinkie shouted. “That was terrible!”

“In what way?”

“First of all, you can’t tell that joke in the middle of the bakery! And second, the joke is ‘What’s brown and sounds like a bell?’ And the answer is ‘Dung!’”

“Is that not what I said? What is the difference?”

“Because the word sounds like the sound a bell makes, Rinny!” she exploded. “Like this: Dunngg, dunngg, dunngg, du--”

“Pinkie Pie, what are you doing?!” Mrs. Cake yelled, stomping her hoof. She’d apparently stepped into the back room and returned at just the wrong moment. “Why are you yelling that in the middle of the bakery?!”

Several customers were now staring at them. Gradually, a few of them began chuckling and talking to themselves and it was clear to Pinkie that she was the object of their laughter. Her cheeks burned and she began to sweat.

“But… but Mrs. Cake, I was just trying to explain the joke to Rinny!”

“I’ll thank you not to tell that sort of joke in front of the customers,” she said sternly, narrowing her eyes. “Now both of you please return to the kitchen.”

“Understood, Mrs. Cake. Pinkie Pie, you may continue your discourse on feces once there.”

The customers’ laughter intensified as Pinkie rushed into the back room. Turing followed her there and saw Pinkie resting her head on the countertop.

“Pinkie Pie? What is wrong?”

“Rinny, I just don’t know what to do.” She stared out vacantly and heaved a sigh. “I mean, you just read an entire book of jokes… don’t any of them, any of them at all make you laugh?!”

“Scanning… no reaction detected.”

“How is that even possible?” she whispered. “Sure not every joke is a winner, but not ONE?”

“I apologize. I cannot seem to discern what is humorous about any of the jokes. Though I have noticed an abnormally large amount of them involve chickens or light bulbs. In one case, both. Are flightless avians and forms of luminescence inherently funny?”

Pinkie buried her face in her hooves. “Rinny, Rinny, Rinny…” She heaved a heavy sigh. “Maybe we need to go simpler.” She paused, then gave a hopeful half-smile. “Try this joke: Do you know what they call a fake noodle? An impasta!”

“Do you mean ‘an imposter?’”

Her smile vanished. “No.”

“Is it amusing because you are mispronouncing the word? Is the malformation of words funny?”

“No, it’s funny because it sounds like ‘imposter’ and ‘pasta!’”

“And yet it is neither. Why is that funny?”

“Because it just is!” she exploded. "Why can't you understand--" She stopped herself and took a deep breath. “All right… all right, one last thing to try.”

She walked over to the counter and grabbed a cream pie. She then sat down and assumed a look of resignation and dignity. “If this old gag doesn’t work, then I don’t know what will.” And then she hit herself in the face with the pie.

Turing stared at her, seeing the crumbling bits of crust and cream slowly drip from Pinkie’s face as she looked back her. Pinkie’s big blue eyes were pleading, desperate.

Just then, Mrs. Cake walked in. “Pinkie, how is the dough for the jam buns…” She froze when she saw Pinkie, her face dead serious and dripping with the remnants of the pie. Periodically, a larger piece would hit the floor with a wet glop. The cream was slowly dribbling down into the shape of a beard. She and Turing were staring back at each other.

Turing noticed her and turned to face her. “Hello Mrs. Cake. I am uncertain of the reason, but I may be responsible for the ruined pie.”

Mrs. Cake tried to stifle a laugh.

“I was of course referring to the pastry, and not to Pinkie Pie. The actual pie. I am uncertain of the meaning behind this pie on Pie violence.”

At that Mrs. Cake lost it and started laughing loudly. She quickly excused herself, leaving the two of them behind.

Turing faced Pinkie again, who was cleaning the pie from her face, mostly by wiping it with her hooves and then licking them clean as somberly as one can lick pie off one’s hooves.

“I do not understand. Why did you destroy that pie instead of eating it normally? Also, why was Mrs. Cake laughing?”

“Rinny, I’m…” Pinkie lowered her head, seemingly unable to face her. After a heavy sigh, she raised her head again. She was frowning and her lower lip quivered. “I don’t think this is working out. Maybe I was wrong. Maybe… maybe robots just plain don’t have a sense of humor.”

***

At the Ponyville Train Station, an unexpected train was slowing and finally came to a stop. The engineer and conductor departed with concerned looks on their faces. They shared a mutually sympathetic look as the few passengers departed.

“Sorry again, folks!” the conductor said loudly. “Looks like this train needs to head for the nearest rail yard for emergency repairs. Talk to the ticket office if you’d like a refund or a ticket on another train at no extra cost. We apologize for the inconvenience!”

He noticed a mare carrying a particularly large suitcase. It was bulging out at the sides, clearly overstuffed and probably heavy. Feeling chivalrous, he trotted over. “Excuse me, Miss. I could help you with that if you like.”

She set it down. “Sure.”

The conductor bit down on the handle of the suitcase and prepared to lift it. It wouldn’t budge. He then grabbed it with both hooves as well, trying to hoist it. It barely budged.

“My goodness, Miss, that’s one heavy bag!” He set it down, panting. Jokingly, he asked “What do have in there, rocks?”

“Yes,” the mare replied. She was a gray earth pony with purple hair, and she wore a dull blue frock. She blinked slowly with heavy-looking eyes and looked at him with a deadpan expression. “Rocks. Pebbles. Gravel.” She walked over to the stunned conductor and lifted the bag with only one hoof, placing it gently on her back. “They’re for my research.”

“Oh. W-well, have a good stay while you’re here, Miss.”

“Thank you.”

And thus Maud Pie turned away, walking off the train platform and toward Ponyville. “I hope Pinkie’s not too busy for a visit today.”

To be continued...

Giggle at the Ghost in the Machine, Part 3

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Pinkie walked out the back door, a sorrowful look on her face as Turing Test followed her. She went into the alley and sat down on the grass, her back to the mechanical mare as she hung her head and let out a tense sigh. “I can’t… I just can’t…”

“Pinkie Pie, are you all right?” Turing asked.

“No,” she said quietly, her back still turned. “I just… I always wanted to make everypony laugh, ever since I was a filly and got my cutie mark.” She looked down at her cutie mark, her lower lip quivering as she did. “I always thought that I could put a smile on anypony’s face. Anypony. Until I met you.” She dug her hoof into the ground, slowly pushing up the dirt as she did so. “You can’t smile, so I thought I could at least make you laugh. Or help you learn to make somepony else laugh. But…”

She heaved another sigh and slowly shook her head. “But I can’t. I just don’t know what to do.” Turing tilted her head to the side as she watched her. “I just can’t make you laugh, Rinny. And I’m sorry that I can’t help you.”

Turing regarded her for a moment, her ears twitching squeakily. She said nothing, but sat in the grass a few meters in front of her. “Pinkie Pie,” she finally said, “you need not be sorry. I am appreciative of your efforts. Your ability to make others laugh is formidable, so it seems that your expertise will be of assistance. It may be that repeated exposure to humor will help me overcome my difficulties. Perhaps you would care to tell me another joke so that I may try again?”

“Another joke?” Pinkie asked. She raised her head and blinked several times. She swallowed and nodded before slowly getting back up and turning towards her. She gave a weak smile. “M-maybe. Um, I don’t know what sort of joke to tell, though. Nothing else has worked, so…” She scrunched her eyes closed as she focused. “There’s gotta be something that even a robot would laugh at.” Her eyes lit up, a big smile on her face. “Ooh, ooh, I just came up with this: it’s a joke about robots!”

“Curious. You may be the first to invent a joke about robots, Pinkie Pie. Please proceed.”

“Okay, okay,” she said as she actually began giggling at her own joke. “Here goes: Why did the robot go back to school?”

“I believe that…” She paused when she saw Pinkie tense up. “You do not wish for me to answer. Very well: I do not know.”

Pinkie nodded. “Good!” she said, her smile keeping in place. “The robot went back to school because she’d gotten a little rusty!” She giggled and watched Turing to see if she would respond.

“Rusty.” Turing tapped her head. “This word normally means corrosion affecting metal. But in this case you are using it to mean a situation when one is out of practice, hence the need to go back to school.” She looked to Pinkie and saw she was slowly nodding. “Then this is another instance of two meanings at once. And yet it ignores that a robot such as myself would not forget things and thus have no need of--”

“Rinny, Rinny, don’t worry about that!” she exclaimed, holding up her hooves. “You’re thinking about it too hard.”

“One can think too hard?” She cocked her head. “How is that the case? Should not all avenues of possibility be explored? How can I know when to cease considering possibilities? How can organics know to limit their thinking? Or perhaps it is merely that organics are limited in their thinking due to the feebleness of their minds.”

“Hey!” Pinkie stiffened, a dark scowl on her face. “We’re not feeble-minded! That’s a mean thing to say!”

“I merely spoke the truth.” She cocked her head. “Perhaps that is my problem. Humor may be a feedback loop that organics experience in response to illogical conditions.”

“Rinnyyy!” Pinkie groaned. “Things are funny when you expect one thing and get another. When I told you those jokes, they were funny because they surprise you!” She took a breath and then smiled calmly. “They’re silly, and that’s why ponies laugh!”

“Silly?” She paused, her eyes momentarily shrinking. “Adjective. Defined as ‘having or showing a lack of common sense or judgment; absurd and foolish.’ So you are saying that humor involves silliness?”

Pinkie looked up, her lips parting slightly. “Yeah,” she breathed. Her eyes opened hopefully. “It’s funny because it isn’t what somepony would normally expect or say or do! That’s what silliness is!” She began to smile again. “Maybe you’re getting it, Rinny!”

“Something absurd or foolish.” She paused. “This requires analysis. May I tell one of the jokes I have learned? I will preserve the original wording.”

“Yes! Please try your best, Rinny!” Pinkie began bouncing eagerly. “I know you can do it!”

“Very well. Initiating joke: ‘I went to a restaurant with a sign that said "Breakfast served at any time!" so I ordered oatmeal in the Paleopony Period.’”

Pinkie giggled. “I remember that joke. That’s a gem!”

“No, it is a joke.”

Pinkie’s giggling intensified. “There you go, Rinny! You did it!” She launched herself at Turing and hugged her. But then she realized Turing was not hugging her back. In fact, her ears were twitching and nothing more. She backed away, her smile slowly fading. “Rinny? What’s wrong?”

“That joke… I believe I understand it.”

“You do? That’s great!”

Turing lowered her head. “I believe I have detected the source of your amusement: the speaker in the joke mistakenly thought that the restaurant meant any time in history, when in fact it only meant at any time of day.”

“Yes!” Pinkie said, a wide toothy grin on her face. She began nodding eagerly. “You got it! You really got it!”

“And just now you laughed at my correction. You laughed at my misunderstanding of your meaning. However, upon analysis, I now realize that you meant it was a ‘gem’ in the idiomatic sense, that it was something of high quality.”

“Y-yeah. You know, Rinny, when you explain the joke, it takes a lot of the fun out of it,” Pinkie sighed. Still, she kept her smile. “At least you got it.”

“Metaphor. Idiom. Hyperbole. I believe I am beginning to understand the contradictory nature of language and in turn of the mechanics of humor. And yet,” she paused and looked down at her hooves, “I am not laughing. And I am not amused. I have finally managed to understand some jokes, and yet they are not funny to me.”

“Welll, that’s too bad,” Pinkie said, shrugging it off. She began to turn back to the bakery, ready to get back to work. “But it’s a start! Maybe we can try some more and--”

“No. No more jokes.”

Pinkie froze and raised an eyebrow. She turned and saw that Turing was staring down at the ground now. “Rinny?” she asked uneasily. “What’s wrong?”

“Humor. I understand it. It is illogical. It is nonsense. It has no meaning.”

“Rinny!” Pinkie gasped, rushing over to her. “Humor does so have meaning! Laughter is important!”

“Is nonsense important to organics? When others misunderstand, when I misunderstand, is it part of your nature to delight in their ignorance?”

Pinkie was about to reach for her, but then she pulled her hoof back and watched her uneasily, her eyes wide. She shivered. Something had shifted. “Rinny?” she whispered. “What’s wrong?”

“Nothing is wrong with me. The problem lies with you.” She looked directly at Pinkie, her face close to hers. “This nonsense and cruelty is what you wanted to teach me? I do not desire this.”

“Rinny…” Pinkie Pie took several steps back, her blue eyes glued to Turing and her ears laid back. “You’re scaring me.”

“Scaring you?” She took a step toward Pinkie. Her eyes were darting around up and down the alley. “I am merely stating my observations. Why is humor so important to you? What flaws in your thinking allow you to say one thing and mean another? What is the purpose in delighting in flawed thinking and uncaring behavior? Tell me. Tell me why this frightens you.”

“Rinny, stop!” Pinkie shouted.

Turing froze in midstep. She paused and backed away. “I see. I apologize, Pinkie Pie. I did not wish to cause you alarm. However, I believe this time spent together has been unproductive.” She turned away and began to trot down the alley. “Goodbye, Pinkie Pie. It seems we cannot become friends.”

Pinkie blinked several times as that last sentence sank in. “Rinny, no, we can still--”

But Turing didn’t stop. Instead, she broke into a gallop and was out of sight in less than a second.

“Rinny,” Pinkie breathed. She sat in the grass and lowered her head. Staring at the grass and earth in the alley, she traced a frowny face with her hoof into the dirt. “What do I do now?”

With no answer to her question, she stood, taking a deep breath to steady herself, and walked back into the bakery. She saw that a tray of cupcakes was almost done and so she trudged over to ready the next tray, her head and tail drooping as she walked.

“Pinkie?” came a voice. Mrs. Cake poked her head into the kitchen, a bright smile on her face. “There’s… oh my, are you all right?” Then she looked around the kitchen. “Wait, where’s Turing Test?”

“She’s… we had a fight.” She sighed, plopping herself on the floor as she tried to blink back tears. “I… I think I made her mad.”

“Oh. Well, I’m sorry about that, but I have something that might cheer you up.” She offered her a kind smile as she went over and placed a hoof on her shoulder. “There’s a visitor here to see you!”

“A visitor?” she raised her head slightly. “I’m not sure that…” She trailed off as she looked to the doorway and a very familiar face came into view.

“Hello, Pinkie.” Maud Pie stood in the doorway, her face totally deadpan. She blinked and tilted her head ever so slightly. “Is it a bad time?”

“Maud! Maud Maud Maud!” She bounded over and hugged her sister tightly.

“Nice to see you too, Pinkie,” Maud said, patting Pinkie on the back.

***

Several minutes later, the two sisters were in Pinkie’s room. After seeing how shaken Pinkie was, Mrs. Cake had given her the rest of the day off.

“I don’t know how things went so wrong, Maud!” Pinkie exclaimed. She was lying on her bed face down, her voice muffled by the bed covers and her legs folded under her.

“Hmm.” Maud murmured.

“I just wanted to make her laugh! And to teach her how great it is to laugh!” She raised her head slightly, but only to look up at her sister through tired, bloodshot eyes. “And all I did was make her angry.”

Maud pat her on the head gently. “It happens.”

“That’s just it: it doesn’t happen!” She sat up, throwing her hooves in the air. “Rinny’s a robot! Until today, I didn’t think she could even get angry!”

“Ah.” Maud paused for a moment, nodding quietly, her expression blank as always. Finally, she looked back to Pinkie. “What’s a robot?”

There was the sound of footsteps and a knock at the door to Pinkie’s room. Mrs. Cake poked her head in. “Pinkie, I don’t want to bother you, but I thought maybe you might feel better with a little snack.” She wore a kind smile. “I could whip something up for you!”

Pinkie gave a slight grin in return. “That’s really nice, Mrs. Cake, but I don’t want to bother you.”

“Oh, it’s no trouble, Pinkie,” Mrs. Cake replied, waving a hoof dismissively.

“Wellll,” Pinkie said, tapping her chin, “in that case I could go for a cupcake with pink frosting. And a cheese danish. And a slice of angel food cake. And one of devil’s food. Ooh, and a few chocolate chip cookies, maybe one with nuts, and a peanut butter cookie in there wouldn’t hurt, along with a milkshake with whipped cream and a cherry on top!” She smiled brightly.

Mrs. Cake’s eye twitched. “That’s… sure thing, dear, if that makes you feel better.” She laughed weakly, but kept her smile.

“Ooh, do you want anything too, Maud?” Pinkie asked, turning to her sister.

Mrs. Cake stiffened at the realization that Pinkie had not intended that order for the both of them to share. “Uh, yes, what can I get you, Maud?”

Maud stared back at her. “Do you have water at this bakery?”

Mrs. Cake blinked. “Yes. Yes, we do.”

“I’ll have that.”

“Sure... thing. Um, any particular way you’d like that water?”

Maud raised an eyebrow. “Wet.”

“Well, yes indeedy, I think we can do that!” she turned to go, chuckling nervously.

“Oh, also, can I get something for my pet? He’s a little hungry after the train ride.”

“Pet?” Mrs. Cake asked, turning back into the room, her eyebrow raised.

Maud took a small pebble from her pocket. “His name is Boulder.”

Mrs. Cake looked to Pinkie to see if she was laughing, thinking this was some kind of prank. Pinkie was only smiling expectantly.

“And, um, what should I get for Boulder?”

“A layer cake.”

Mrs. Cake nearly lost her balance. “A layer cake?!”

“Mm hmm.” She held out the tiny rock further. “Especially if you have one with strawberries. He likes strawberries.”

“Coming… coming right up, dearies,” Mrs. Cake said, backing out of the room.

“Maauud, I thought you were gonna put Boulder on a diet!” Pinkie said, elbowing her sister with a mischievous smile and a sideways glance.

“I was.” She pet her rock gently. “But I can’t say no to that face.” She looked back at Pinkie. “So what’s a robot?”

“Oh, right! Well, it started when Applejack found this pony, but it wasn’t a normal pony, because it was a machine, see? Like a clock or a wind up toy!”

Maud blinked. “Like that one Dad sat on?”

“Yes, exactly!” Pinkie said, nodding emphatically. “Rinny’s a super giant Dad-butt-proof version of that! But she can talk and move and all sorts of stuff! Twilight wants her to learn friendship!” She reached into her mane and pulled out a piece of paper, giving it to Maud. “It’s all right here in this brochure I made.”

“Hm.” Maud opened it, skimming the contents. “I like the font.”

“Thanks! I think it explains the little details pretty well.”

Maud finished skimming it and returned it to Pinkie. “So, you’re trying to be friends with her. That’s nice.”

“Yeah, Rinny’s super strong and fast and she’s also really nice to every…pony…” Pinkie stopped, remembering her situation. She frowned and her eyes again began to fill with tears. “And no matter what I do, I keep messing things up with her. I just wanted to teach her how to laugh and teach her humor, but all I did was lose a possible new friend!”

Maud gave her a hanky. She took it and blew into it.

“Thanks.” She let out a heavy sigh and rolled onto her back, the momentum jostling Maud slightly on the bed. “I just don’t know, Maud. Sure, not everypony has a good sense of humor, but Rinny said jokes and humor were all about nonsense or making fun of other ponies! She said she never wanted to learn it and that normal ponies were awful for liking it!”

Maud blinked. “Hm.”

“I’ve told jokes before that other ponies didn’t think were all that funny, but Rinny took forever just to get the idea of a joke, and when she did, she thought it was mean to laugh at all!” She buried her face in her hooves. “I ruined everything! I ju-just wanted to t-teach her and I r-ru-ruined humor for her foreve~er!” she wailed.

Maud pulled her off the bed and into a tight hug. “It’s okay,” she said in her usual calm way. Pinkie relaxed and let Maud hold her.

“You know, Pinkie, some ponies think I’m not very funny either.”

Pinkie shot back, gasping as she stared Maud in the face. “You?! No way!”

Maud nodded. “It’s hard to believe, I know.” She blinked slowly. “But it’s true.”

“Well, that’s just silly! You’ve got a great sense of humor!”

“But not like yours.” She smiled slightly. “Nopony has a sense of humor like yours.”

Pinkie rolled her eyes. “Well duh! Everypony has a different sense of humor!”

“Everypony?”

“Yes, every--” She froze and narrowed her eyes. “I get it. You’re saying Rinny might have a sense of humor after all. It just isn’t like mine.”

Maud gave a short nod. “Your jokes are great, Pinkie. But maybe your robot friend just doesn’t understand them the way you do.”

“Yeah… and maybe that’s why she got angry.” She nodded to herself, then looked up with determination. “Maud, it’s my duty to teach Rinny that humor is not terrible and help her become happy again!”

“I think I can stay a while,” Maud said. “Maybe I can help too.”

Just then Mrs. Cake returned with a veritable mountain of food balanced uneasily on her back and platters wobbling on her front hooves.

“Uh, here’s your ‘snack,’ girls!”

Maud held Boulder out, balancing him on her hoof.

“Oh, and, uh, you too, Boulder,” Mrs. Cake added quickly.

***

Turing Test was walking down the streets of Ponyville alone. She attracted a few stares and even ponies who were occupied in their business or conversations that day raised their heads. The constant whirr of her servos as she walked was audible over everypony’s chatter and her heavy hoofsteps fell noisily even on the earthen road.

She considered going back to Twilight’s Castle, but there was nopony there: Spike had traveled to Canterlot with Twilight. She’d read in books that ponies sometimes went for walks to clear their heads, so she decided to see if such a technique would work on a robot.

Anger. I experienced anger. She slowed her pace. This was not the emotion I desired to experience. I do not like this feeling. Something has gone wrong. It must be in response to this situation. I must determine: is the flaw with Pinkie Pie or organic ponies in general, or is this flaw my own?

She glanced around at all the other ponies staring at her as she walked.

Humor may provide a solution, but I seem to be incapable of enjoying humor. Humor is illogical. It is cruel. Therefore, anypony who expresses it must also be cruel and illogical. Since all organic ponies seem capable of humor, then all organic ponies are cruel and illogical. This may explain why most organic ponies still regard me with fear or mistrust more often than with positivity: organics are naturally hostile and unreasonable creatures.

She felt it then: her anger grew more intense. The intolerability of it, the impossibility of the situation, and the unfeasibility of her mission to make friends. If ponies were indeed cruel, then making friends was neither possible nor desirable, and yet it was her directive.

Perhaps my directive is worthless. Making friends with organics is of no value. She stopped in her tracks and evaluated that.

However, Twilight Sparkle has expressed humor. Gadget and Rainbow Dash have as well. Upon analysis, all my friends have demonstrated humor. If my assessment is correct, then they are cruel and illogical as well.

She replayed some of her memories and considered this. Her ears twitched and her eyes contracted. That is incorrect. Twilight Sparkle is not cruel. My other friends are not cruel either. Though at times they seem to be illogical, they demonstrate great wisdom and kindness to me. Their friendships are to be valued. If they are kind, then humor must not be cruel. I have erred. The flaw is not in organics or their humor. It is in my thinking.

Turing glanced to her side and saw a boutique nearby. She saw by its coxcomb-shaped roof and silhouetted image of a laughing pony on the sign that it was the joke shop. She made her way to the large shop window and spied through it. Rubber chickens, cans of peanut brittle containing spring-loaded snakes, whoopie cushions, and other similar materials were laid out for all to see.

Then she looked up and saw an image in the glass staring back at her. She tilted her head and the pony in the glass did the same, the light reflecting off the metal faceplate as unblinking, glowing violet eyes followed her.

My own reflection. It is not as clear as that of my mirror. It still serves its purpose: I am able to compare myself to organic ponies. She raised a brass hoof, gently placing it against the glass as her reflection did the same. I am different. I am unlike organics. I see them laugh and wish to join, to know that feeling. And yet I am unable to do so. Perhaps Pinkie was correct in her original summation: perhaps, as a robot, I do not have a sense of humor. Rather than accept that conclusion, I became angry. I frightened Pinkie Pie and then denied her as a friend. She wished to befriend me, but now I have alienated her.

Then she felt her anger subside and it was replaced by a familiar feeling: sadness.

My creators were too shortsighted to give me the things I needed to truly integrate with ponies. My face which cannot smile, my eyes which cannot blink, and a mind that cannot take delight in the harmless silliness of my friends. I am not equipped to be a good friend. I cannot even handle the few emotions I manage to experience. I am flawed.

“Turing Test?”

She lifted her head, recognizing the voice instantly. She turned around. “Hello Scootaloo. Are you well?”

Scootaloo had pulled up right behind her. For some reason, Turing’s auditory sensors had failed to detect the low buzz of her wings as she propelled her scooter forward. She removed her blue helmet and placed it on the handlebars of the scooter before getting off and walking up to her.

“I’m fine, thanks,” Scootaloo said, trotting closer to her. “What are you doing staring at that window? Is there something you want to buy?”

Turing hesitated. “No. I am examining my reflection.”

“What, did you forget what you looked like?” Scootaloo asked, chuckling at her own joke.

“No. In fact, I have a very large amount of data stored with regard to my own appearance.”

Scootaloo rolled her eyes. “Never mind that. What I really mean is what are you doing here alone? And why are you looking at the reflection?”

“I am contemplating how I differ from other ponies. My reaction to these differences has been negative.” She looked down at her hoof. “Today has been difficult. When confronted with my inadequacies, I experienced anger. The emotion was strange to me, and it has had a deleterious effect on my actions. I was attempting to befriend Pinkie Pie, but instead the emotion caused me to be cruel. Making friends is my directive, and yet the emotion overcame my rationality and caused me to say unkind things that alienated her.”

Scootaloo frowned at that, but then offered a slight grin. “Well, if you’re trying to be more like regular ponies, then I guess getting too mad to think straight counts.”

“That was not something I wished to emulate.” She sat and crouched lower to look at Scootaloo on her own eye level. “Today, I spent time with Pinkie Pie attempting to learn humor. It seems that I have failed. I find it difficult to understand jokes, and even when I do understand, I do not find them funny. As a robot, I may not have any sense of humor. I know I am incapable of smiling, but it seems I am also incapable of laughing or perhaps of being amused.”

“So… wait, is that why you were staring at your reflection?”

“In part.” She stood again and looked back to her reflection. “Previously, I regarded my physical and mental differences as mere hindrances to socialization. They were obstacles to fulfilling my directive to make friends. However, I seem to have developed an increasingly negative personal reaction.”

Scootaloo tilted her head. “Wait, what?”

“Clarifying: I am saying that before, these differences had no emotional impact. That has changed. Now, they bother me. They sadden me. They anger me. I do not know what to do. These emotions are becoming stronger and perhaps more frequent. Gadget hypothesized that this would be the case. And yet I cannot resolve them. If I cannot be like organic ponies, then I will never be able to socialize properly. I will never be capable of being a good friend.”

Scootaloo came up beside her and stood on hind legs, resting her forelegs on the shop window sill. She looked at her own reflection and sighed. But then she smiled. “You’re wrong, Turing. I guess even a smart robot like you can’t figure everything out.”

Turing looked down at her. The filly met her eyes and offered a warm smile. “I do not understand. In what way am I in error?”

She looked up and down the street and relaxed when she saw that nopony was looking her way. “Let me show you something.” She backed up several steps and sighed. With resignation, she lowered her head and, wearing a strained expression, began to flap her wings. The rapid fluttering made them a blur and they created a light buzzing sound as they cut through the air, but in spite of the obvious effort and tremendous speed of the little wings, Scootaloo barely lifted off the ground. She hovered for a few seconds before returning to the earth.

“You did not achieve sufficient lift.” She cocked her head, puzzled. “Are you indicating that you cannot fly?”

Scootaloo nodded. “It’s not something I like to talk about.”

“Is flightlessness abnormal for pegasi your age?”

She made a face, but nodded again. “Yeah. Almost all pegasi my age can fly. But not me.”

“Then you are indicating that you are like me.” She put her hoof out and rested it on Scootaloo’s shoulder. “We are both flawed.”

“No!” Scootaloo shouted abruptly, moving back and shoving away Turing’s outstretched hoof. “That’s not my point! I’m ‘different,’ but that doesn’t mean I’m ‘flawed!’ And neither are you!”

Turing said nothing, but only stared down at her, ears twitching as she processed what Scootaloo had said.

“Listen, Turing, I’ll be honest: not being able to fly and not having my cutie mark yet… it stinks. It really feels awful. If the world was fair, I’d be able to fly and never have to feel bad about being a blank flank.” She heaved a sigh. “But I was born this way and not everypony figures out their cutie mark at the same time. Life just isn’t fair.”

“I see. Then you mean we must accept the deficiencies we have and accept that nothing can be done.”

Scootaloo rolled her eyes. “No, that’s not it either.” She went over to her scooter. “Sure, I can’t fly, but I still get around!” She pat the scooter as if it were a trusty pet and smiled up at Turing. “And look at you! You’re super strong, you’re almost as fast as Rainbow Dash, and you can do things all three different types of ponies can do! Only the Princesses can do that!”

Turing tilted her head. “Those abilities are useful. But they will not help me make friends like having a sense of humor or normal facial expressions can.”

“Turing, if you’re so bad at making friends,” Scootaloo said, raising an eye as she leaned on the handlebars of her scooter, “then how come you have enough friends to throw you a Bot Mitzvah party? Not being able to laugh or smile hasn’t stopped you from becoming friends with other ponies, has it?”

Turing rubbed her chin, oblivious to the way Scootaloo grit her teeth and winced at the harsh scraping sound it made. “It has not. I believe I understand now: you are saying that I should compensate for my disabilities by focusing on my strengths.”

“That, plus who knows? Maybe someday you will be able to do all the things you want.” She looked back at her wings hopefully. “Maybe someday my wings will grow and I’ll be able to fly too. I’m not going to give up, but in the meantime, I’ll remember something a great pony told me once. She said ‘Maybe you’ll fly someday, or maybe you won’t. You’re all kinds of awesome anyway.’ And you know what? She was right.” She smiled proudly, raising her head high. “I am awesome.”

Turing slowly nodded. “I believe I understand now. Then… am I also awesome?”

“I sure think so!” She went over and stuck out her hoof. Turing looked at it a moment, then recognizing the gesture, tapped her own hoof to it.

“I believe you have given me good advice. You are very wise, Scootaloo.”

Scootaloo blushed, looking down and away. “Nah, I’m… I’m just passing on some good advice to a friend.”

Turing’s eyes contracted. “Then perhaps this day was not completely unproductive. I am glad to have your friendship Scootaloo.” She paused. “I may still be able to reverse some of the damage that has been done. Will you accompany me to Sugarcube Corner? I may need somepony to vouch on my behalf. I am sorry to say I left Pinkie Pie with a negative impression.”

“Sure thing! Follow me!” she said, getting on her scooter.

***

Twilight made her way through the cavernous hallway of Canterlot Castle, her hooves silently falling on the red carpet and the bright light shining through the tall windows on her left. She had managed to get herself calm and collected before making her way to Canterlot, but her heart was beginning to beat more rapidly as she approached the open arch-shaped doorway that led to the meeting room. Through the doorway, she could already see Princess Celestia sitting at the pearl-white polished stone table. She smiled as she entered and Celestia smiled back. Twilight relaxed as she sat down on a cushion, facing Celestia as she had many times before.

It’s just like always. This is Princess Celestia. There’s no need to be nervous.

The doors slammed behind her, startling her out of her own thoughts as she clutched at her chest. Celestia raised an eyebrow at her curiously, but Twilight just chuckled and shook her head.

“You’re a little jumpy today, Twilight,” Celestia said. She smiled. “Since you offered me tea when I came to visit, I had some prepared for you as well.”

Twilight noticed the cup of tea for the first time, the tip of the cup lined with gold and the contents dark and still steaming hot. She inhaled and smiled at the aroma.

“Ceylon,” Celestia said, levitating her own cup to likewise enjoy the scent. She closed her eyes and smiled. “A favorite of mine, actually. They grow it in the mountains of Sri Llama.”

Twilight sipped the cup and set it down, relaxing a bit more. “It’s delicious, Princess Celestia. Thank you.”

“Good. I thought you might be tense for this meeting. I wanted to make sure you were comfortable.” She sighed. “In truth, I haven’t been looking forward to this meeting either. But we are both Princesses and we must do our duties to Equestria in this situation. Can we both agree on that?”

Twilight nodded, her face calm but resolute. “Of course,” she said, setting her teacup down and sitting up straight. “I’ll do everything I can for the ponies of Equestria.”

Celestia set her own cup down and levitated some papers from a nearby desk onto the table. Twilight followed them with her eyes as Celestia laid them down.

“My letter,” Twilight said.

“Yes. I have to admit, while I appreciate the honesty and forthcoming nature of it, this letter seems a little…” she paused, putting a hoof to her chin, looking up at the ceiling. “...candid. Almost confrontational.”

Twilight leaned forward, holding up her hooves defensively. “Oh, no, Princess, that’s not what I meant by it.”

“Twilight, you are a wonderfully kind mare and have always been respectful to me and all other ponies you’ve known for as long as I’ve known you,” she said, smiling gently. The smile faltered a bit as she looked over to the letter. “However, this is rather blunt: ‘I have decided that I will keep Turing Test with me. She is my friend and I will not allow anypony else to take her. As the Princess of Friendship, that is my decision and I do not think anypony can order me to give her up, including you.’”

Twilight tried hard not to gulp, but her eyes darted slightly as Celestia turned from the letter to look down at her. Celestia’s face was calm, her expression stony, but there was just a hint of a raised eyebrow as well.

“I don’t know, Princess Twilight, that seems just a little confrontational to me.” She smiled slightly, and Twilight wasn’t sure if Celestia was genuinely calm or just doing an excellent job of appearing that way. “Would you care to explain a little more?” Celestia asked.

“Oh!” Twilight exclaimed, sitting up stiffly again. “Well, I, I j-just meant that…”

She shook her head, placed her foreleg on her chest as she took a deep breath, and let it out slowly as she extended her arm, using Cadance’s old calming technique. She was royalty now, and she reminded herself that there was no need to be timid.

“Turing Test has shown remarkable progress, Princess Celestia. She’s had emotions and she’s befriended me and several ponies. She’s still learning and she’s still very awkward, but I believe that this could be a sign that even artificial creatures can make friends. My original idea was to find out if a machine could be friends and that’s what she’s doing and getting better at every day.

“Since this is allowing me to learn more about friendship and spread it to beings we never dreamed were possible earlier in our history, I think this is well within the bounds of my duties and responsibilities as Princess of Friendship. In order for this to continue, Turing Test must not be taken away. She must be allowed to continue learning in Ponyville, just as I did.”

Celestia smiled. “Very well said, Twilight.”

“Then,” Twilight began, her eyes lighting up, “you agree with me!”

“I… did not say that,” Celestia said. She turned away and looked out the large window of the meeting room, seeing the sun, her sun, slowly travel across the sky. “Indeed, there may be more going on here than you realize.”

“I see.” Twilight grew quiet and looked down at her tea. “You still think Turing is dangerous.”

“Based on your report, I actually am less worried about the automaton now,” Celestia said, smiling slightly. “It seems it might once have posed a threat, but now it is firmly under your control, thankfully.” She let out a long sigh before turning back to her. “That relieves me, Twilight. In truth, I hadn’t been sleeping well lately and I worried for your safety.”

Twilight swallowed, deciding not to mention that she had also recently had the same problem and for the same reason.

“This automaton, Turing Test, is no longer my primary worry. Instead, I’m worried about the ponies who built it. One of them was spying on you and clearly was fine with it staying with you, and still is. That concerns me greatly.”

“You mean Fine Print,” Twilight said. She nodded. “I see. You think he and the ponies who built her still have a purpose for her.”

“Yes. And we do not know who this Fine Print is or where he has gone. But I have no doubt that he is hiding and being sheltered with the others who built the automaton. They could be lying in wait for a long time or they could make a move tomorrow. It worries me.”

Twilight shuddered. And then she remembered that Turing Test was with Pinkie Pie, and the two of them might be totally unaware of any potential danger. She shifted uncomfortably on her cushion and her eyes glanced out the window. She spied Ponyville in the distance and her mind began to imagine the possibilities.

“I see you understand what I’m talking about.” She frowned, looking at Twilight sympathetically.

“I do.” She swallowed. “But since we’re discussing the problem, then maybe we should speak plainly, Princess.” She looked up at Celestia, her features emotionless. “Please be honest: why do you hate Turing?”

Celestia’s eyes went wide and she reeled back. “Hate her? Why, Twilight, I don’t hate her! I have no feelings about her at all!”

Twilight’s expression did not change. “I’m sorry if I offended you, Princess Celestia, but I think there must be more to this than just fear of some conspiracy.” She softened slightly, her eyes opening a bit more as she frowned. “Normally I know I can count on your care and support, but ever since I told you what was happening, you’ve been… um, less supportive.”

Celestia opened her mouth, about to protest, but then she stopped and let it drop. She smiled and even laughed slightly. “I suppose you’re right, Twilight. You deserve to know my thoughts and feelings on this matter completely.”

She took a sip of her tea. As she lowered the cup, she stared into it, holding it there for several moments as a faraway gaze came to her.

Twilight waited for an answer, but didn’t dare speak. Celestia’s frown deepened. She looks so tired, Twilight said to herself.

“Twilight, when I had to banish my own sister, I often thought about how I would ever go on without her. You know how grateful I am to you for what you and your friends have done. Bringing her back to me was truly the most wonderful thing anypony has ever done for me. However, I had to wait a thousand years to see that happen. Do you want to know what kept me going throughout all the years between?”

Twilight smiled and nodded. “Of course.”

“It was all the ponies of Equestria.” She smiled, raising her head and staring out the window. “For a long time, I despaired of finding joy again, and yet I did. Seeing the ponies of Equestria go about their lives, their works, and seeing them pursue their dreams made me realize that I had a role to fill as the lone ruler of Equestria. Though Starswirl predicted that Luna would return in a thousand years, I had to ensure that the world she came back to would be a peaceful one, filled with ponies whose lives were happy. I came down off my pedestal and became less distant with my subjects.”

Twilight drew in a breath. Celestia’s gaze became even more distant and her voice had the faintest crack in it.

Celestia closed her eyes. “I have seen generations of ponies pass before me. And while it does sadden me, I feel privileged to have been witness to their lives and to have presided over a nation that allowed them to become whoever they wished. All lives… each life is precious. That gave me peace as I waited for Luna’s return.”

Twilight nodded and gave her a smile. “I understand. Princess Celestia, Equestria is lucky to have you.” Her smile faltered. “But what does that have to do with Turing?”

Celestia sighed, her smile melting away. “As I said, each life is precious. But now some group of inventors has made an automaton that can do almost everything a normal pony can do. And perhaps even do it better. They were able to manufacture one, so why not more? Why not ten? Why not a hundred?” She stood and stepped toward Twilight. “Why not a whole race of them? Stronger, smarter, and potentially without emotions - or morals - to do their bidding. Somepony out there is creating artificial ponies, and when you can just build a life out of metal and wires--”

She paused, putting her hoof to her chest and letting her breath out evenly.

“Celestia?” Twilight asked quietly, looking at her sideways. “Are you all right?”

She smiled reassuringly. “Yes. I’m sorry, I just find the thought disturbing. When you can just build an artificial pony in a factory, what does that mean for a real, living pony? To me, it seems they’ve made that life redundant. Turing may not be at fault, but she is clearly at the center of this conspiracy and I fear what will happen if the ponies who built her succeed in their mission. She might be the first step toward a very frightening future. I do not wish to see that future unfold, especially when it is being engineered by those who would call the Princess of Friendship their enemy.”

Twilight looked down, hugging herself at that. “I see. It isn’t that you hate Turing. It’s that you hate what she represents. What she might be a part of.”

“I know this pains you, Twilight,” Celestia said. She came completely around the table and sat next to her student, drawing one massive white wing around her and pulling her in close. “I cannot fathom how you can befriend a machine, but I trust you when you say it is true. And I do not want to ask you to give up a friend of yours.” She looked down at her and their eyes met. “But the danger may be more severe than you know. Until we know more, I would like to ask you, would you please consider relocating Turing to Canterlot?”

“C-Canterlot?” Twilight cried, standing up and backing out of Celestia’s wing’s embrace. She stared back, wide eyed. “You still want to take her away?”

“Twilight, please, calm down,” Celestia said, standing. “Listen: you have convinced me that she is no threat and even that she may be more deserving of your care than I thought. I assure you, she would not be harmed or destroyed or even deactivated. You could visit as much as you liked and she would be shown every kindness. We could place her into protection with the Royal Guard. As it is, even she might not be safe from these ponies.”

“Safe?” Twilight blinked. “But… the ponies who built her wouldn’t hurt her!”

“No, but they may not care anything for the friendship you’ve built.” Celestia swallowed, but steeled herself. “They might simply delete everything you’ve taught her. The memories of you and her life in Ponyville would be gone.”

Twilight gawked at that. “Turing… no, they… why would they…”

“I am not certain that such a thing would happen.” She narrowed her gaze. “But I doubt they would let her stay your ally. So, for your sake, for your friends’ sake, for the nation’s sake, and even just for her sake, Twilight: please let us protect her.”

Twilight felt lightheaded. She swayed slightly and felt short of breath. She sat and Celestia came to her side, but she held out a hoof. “I’m all right,” she gasped. “It’s… I see. Thank you for explaining it to me.”

Celestia nodded. “You deserve to know the full truth and the whole implication of this situation, Twilight. So then,” she said, staring at her intently, “what is your decision?”

Twilight closed her eyes and slowed her breathing. Gradually it became regular and even, and she felt her heartbeat slow to normal. Once she had control over herself, she got to her hooves and raised her head. She opened her eyes and smiled up at Celestia. And then, Twilight Sparkle said:

“No.”

To be continued...

Giggle at the Ghost in the Machine, Part 4

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Celestia’s eyes opened wide at Twilight's direct answer and she raised her head. “Excuse me?”

“I’m sorry Princess Celestia,” Twilight said, her eyes closed. She raised her head and took a deep breath. When her eyes opened again, they were still and she did not blink or look away. “I appreciate your reasoning and they might be good reasons, but I am not going to give Turing Test over.”

Celestia sighed. “Twilight, I think you could be making a mistake. But if that is not the case, then may I hear your reasoning?”

Twilight tapped her chin. “Well, there are a few reasons. The first is that I don’t think Turing could fulfill her directive if she were placed into protection. She is trying to learn about the world.” She used her horn to conjure up the image of Turing’s silhouette, and then surrounded it with the images of several other ponies. “She can only do that by interacting. Just like when you pushed me to worry about more than just studying and sent me to Ponyville to make friends.”

Celestia smiled at that.

“But if we cut her off from the rest of the world,” Twilight continued, her eyes narrowing, “then she’ll only be able to learn about the world through what others tell her.” The image of the other ponies vanished and four lines connected to form a box around the image of Turing. “If we want her to develop into something more, we can’t just lock her up like that.” She let the image fade.

“Twilight, there is a difference between protective custody and being a prisoner.” Celestia looked down. “I am not happy about the situation, but it would only be temporary, and as I said, she would be cared for.”

“Well, that’s good to know, however…” Twilight swallowed and finally looked away. She waited a moment, took a breath, and then continued. “Let’s change the situation slightly. Let’s say Turing Test wasn’t a robot. Let’s say she was, for example, a pony that had been enchanted by dark magic. And then let’s say that we were worried about a group of wizards who might someday come and take Turing back to extract the magical energy from her.”

“Well, that’s an interesting theory, Twilight,” Celestia replied. She looked up and to her right. “I suppose the situation would be about the same.” She nodded lightly to herself. “We would still offer her protective custody until we were certain she was safe.”

“Yes, of course,” Twilight said, a smile appearing on her face. “And that’s good, but think about what you just said, Princess. You said you could ‘offer’ protective custody. In Turing’s real situation, you want me to order her to do that. And if I wasn’t a Princess or we weren’t friends, I think you might have simply made it a demand instead of a request.” She swallowed. “Am I wrong?”

Celestia pressed her lips together. “No. I suppose, were you not a princess and my friend, then I would not have given you, or her, a choice in the matter.” She hesitated. “But having said that, Twilight, is that really fair? Turing Test, despite your feelings, isn’t a real pony.”

Twilight winced slightly, but showed no other reaction. “That might be a matter of opinion, Princess. It’s true that she’s artificial, and that she’s made of metal and wires and gears,” she said. “But that doesn’t mean that she’s not ‘real’ in any important sense,” she added, shaking her head slightly. “A week ago, I would have agreed - she was just a thing that moved around and talked. But now she’s shown gratitude, pride in her accomplishments, and amazement with the world around her. She may not have the same feelings as a regular pony just yet, but when she discovers something new, it’s like seeing the wonder of the world and of friendship all over again for me! And I get to teach her these things and see her become something brand new!

“In talking with Gadget, I think that it’s clear that Turing is becoming self-aware. She knows what she is and thinks about what she’s doing and what she wants. And…” she took a deep breath, her voice becoming strained, “and I nearly forgot that myself.”

Celestia’s eyes widened. “Twilight?” she asked. “Are you all right?”

“Yes,” Twilight said with a small laugh, though her eyes were beginning to well up. “You see, Turing Test cares so much about pleasing me and others around her that she almost kept her own opinions silent because she didn’t think they were important. When I told her to tell me the truth about what she wanted, she said ‘Please don’t--’”

She stopped, swallowing hard as she steadied herself. Celestia blinked at her, her mouth dropping open.

“She said ‘Please don’t send me away.’” She heaved a sigh, but managed to smile anyway, looking up at Celestia through shimmering eyes. “That’s all she wants, more than anything else: she wants to stay with her friends. And that brings me to the final reason why I can’t order her to go into protection. Turing wants to stay where she is and I gave her my word that I would not send her away.”

Celestia was still staring at her, blinking several times. Then she seemed to snap out of it and closed her mouth. She slowly inhaled and shut her eyes solemnly. “I see. Well, that is noble, but are you certain that’s a promise you should keep?” She opened her eyes and frowned. “What will you do if you are attacked?”

“If somepony is targeting me, then I don’t think they would stop even if Turing were gone. In fact, since Turing is fearless and loyal and incredibly powerful, not to mention no longer under anypony else’s control, I’d say she’d make a pretty good bodyguard.” Twilight smiled. “I’m not going to live in fear of others who may or may not threaten me. I’ll let my friends know about all this and we’ll be careful.”

Celestia let out a long sigh, but she was smiling. “I still don’t know if I agree with your decision, Princess Twilight,” she said. She stood to her full height and bowed to her. “However, it is your decision to make and you have explained your reasons well. Very well: I’ll consider the matter settled. Your robot friend has my blessings and, as always, so do you.”

Twilight wore a beaming smile and she rushed over to Celestia, who lowered her neck to accept Twilight’s embrace. “Thank you for understanding, Princess Celestia. I’m lucky to have you as a friend.”

“No more than I am lucky to have you as one,” Celestia replied, raising her head. “Or, it would seem, no more than Turing Test is lucky to have you.” Clearing her throat, she added, “Still, if it’s all right with you, I’d like to give you a few guidelines for keeping your friends, including Turing Test, safe.”

Twilight nodded, keeping her head held up high. “Of course. What are they?”

“The first is that I ask that any developments or findings you or Cornelius or his assistant come across regarding the ponies who built Turing Test be reported to me. I consider it a matter of national security.”

Twilight nodded. “Of course. I’ll tell Mr. Vanderbull and Gadget immediately.”

“The second is that you and your friends be extremely careful around anypony who seems suspicious or particularly interested in Turing Test in case they happen to be another agent of this conspiracy.”

Twilight nodded again. “Yes, that makes sense.”

"In truth, Twilight, I would recommend that you take a group of the Royal Guard during this time." She saw Twilight make a sour face. "But I see that you're still against that idea."

"Yes. I'm sorry, but the Princess of Friendship should be available to anypony who wants her. Er, me." She giggled, blushing as she covered her face with her foreleg. "I don't want to be surrounded by guards who would intimidate others around me."

Celestia nodded. “I understand. In that case, the third thing to keep in mind, though it hardly needs to be said, is that if Turing Test harms anypony or becomes dangerous, she must be deactivated.”

Twilight hesitated, but finally nodded in agreement. “Yes. But that won’t happen.”

“I hope so.” Celestia sighed before continuing. “And the last request is very simple: I don’t want these conspirators to succeed in their mission, so they must not get their hooves on Turing Test again. From this point forward and whenever possible, I would suggest that you make sure she has somepony with her. She should not be left unattended.”

Twilight smiled and bowed to her. “As you wish. I’ll do my best to make sure she’s never left alone.”

***

“Ohhh, wow, that hit the spot!” Pinkie said, moaning contentedly and rubbing her belly as she collapsed back on her bed. “Nopony makes sweets like the Cakes!”

“The water was good.” Maud remarked. She turned to Pinkie, passing her a napkin. “You have a little icing on your everything.”

Just then there was a knock at the door. Mrs. Cake entered Pinkie’s room and they saw she wasn’t alone.

“Mrs. Cake? Oh, and it’s you, Scootsie!” Pinkie said, bouncing over in spite of her full stomach. “What brings you here?”

“Well,” Mrs. Cake said, “after I saw how upset you were I was going to tell her to come back later, but Scootaloo here insisted she needed to see you now.” She looked over her shoulder and down the stairs uneasily. Turning back to Pinkie, she tried to smile in spite of herself. “It seems Turing Test is back.”

“Please, Pinkie!” Scootaloo said, darting over to her. “You’ve gotta come down and give her another cha--”

“Okay!” Pinkie said cheerfully.

“Huh?” Mrs. Cake and Scootaloo said while raising an eyebrow in unison.

“Yeah, I was going to go find her with Maud after we finished our snack anyway!” She zipped back over to Maud, her eyes bright and her smile wide. “Now we don’t have to track her down!”

“That’s good,” Maud replied, slowly sliding off the bed. “I don’t think I could have gotten Boulder back into my pocket anyway.”

Mrs. Cake chuckled slightly. “What do you mean, dear? I mean, it’s not like he could actually eat that caAUGH!” She stopped as she looked down at the platter which had once contained a cake. It now contained nothing but crumbs and a very familiar, and very large rock.

“Buh… guh… how di… whathebu…”

“Oh that Boulder!” Pinkie laughed. “He just can’t say no to strawberries!”

***

Turing was sitting at a table waiting for Pinkie, Mrs. Cake, and Scootaloo to return. She saw them come down the stairs and then, unexpectedly, saw another mare with them.

“Rinny, I’m so glad you’re back!” Pinkie cried, rushing over and hugging her.

“Strange. I was not expecting this reception after my earlier behavior.”

“Hey, I was serious about being friends earlier,” Pinkie said, standing up and thumping her chest as she tried her best to look dignified. “And one of the first things friends can do is forgive each other.”

Turing tilted her head to the left and right. “Understood. However, I believe it to be proper etiquette to express my apologies. I therefore apologize for my aggressiveness, Pinkie Pie. I had never experienced anger before and did not wish to frighten you.”

Pinkie smiled brightly and looked to Mrs. Cake, who regarded Turing untrustingly. But seeing Pinkie’s blue eyes light up made her soften, and thus she smiled as well. “All right, Turing. I was a little mad after you gave Pinkie a scare, but if she forgives you, then so do I. You are welcome here any time you like.”

“Woohoo!” Pinkie shouted, tossing confetti into the air.

“I notice you have another companion, Pinkie Pie.”

“Yep!” She reached over and drew Maud closer to her, hugging her once before gesturing to Turing and back. “This is my sister Maud, Rinny! And Maud, this is my robot friend Rinny! Maud, Rinny! Rinny, Maud!”

“Hello.”

“Hi.”

The two of them then proceeded to say nothing.

“Would you like to sit down with me?” Turing asked after a beat.

“Sure,” Maud replied.

Maud sat down and the two continued to stare at each other in silence.

“Pinkie says you’re actually a machine.”

“That is correct.”

The two settled again into their silence. Mrs. Cake took the time to back away slowly.

“You are Pinkie’s sister. Are you also interested in baking?”

Maud shook her head. “I like rocks. I study them.”

“That seems reasonable. Rocks make up most of the planet. Studying them must be important.”

“Mm hmm.”

Scootaloo tapped Pinkie on the leg. “Psst, Pinkie!” she whispered. “Are you sure Maud’s not a robot too?”

“Oh of course she’s not, Scootsie!” Pinkie laughed. “How could you ask such a silly question when Maud is so super-duper-excited!”

Scootaloo’s eye twitched as she looked to Maud.

“I see you are made of metal,” Maud observed.

“That is correct.”

Maud reached out with a hoof, holding it near Turing’s own foreleg which was resting on the table. “May I?”

“Yes, you may.”

Maud tapped Turing’s foreleg, her ears twitching. “Huh. Titanium alloy. You must be very strong.”

“Correct. I also contain--”

“Wait.” She leaned closer and took a deep breath, sniffing her. “Vanadium. And… molybdenum.”

“Correct. It seems your knowledge of rocks extends to materials refined from raw ore.”

Maud blinked. And then, every so slightly, her mouth curved slightly upward. She turned to Pinkie. “I like her.”

Turing looked to Pinkie as well. “We are compatible.”

“Wow! You two are getting along so well!” She bounced ecstatically. “I haven’t seen Maud take to anypony like this in ages, Rinny!”

“Pinkie, stop. You’re embarrassing me,” Maud intoned dryly. She blinked again. “Sorry to fly off the handle like that.”

Scootaloo elbowed Pinkie, causing her to bend down to hear her whisper again. “Um… can I leave now?” she asked out of the corner of her mouth. “This is really weirding me out.”

“Not sure why, but okey-dokey-lokey!”

Once Scootaloo had left, Turing was at last alone with the Pie sisters. The three of them sat at their table in the nearly deserted Sugarcube Corner.

“So, anyway, Rinny, I’m really glad you came back. And I’m sorry if I got mad at you earlier too,” she added, lowering her ears abashedly, her eyes downcast. “I didn’t mean to make you feel bad.”

“I believe we should disregard our altercation, Pinkie Pie,” Turing replied. “I have come to the conclusion that humor is not the negative thing I assumed it to be. If the number of ponies I call friends can appreciate humor, then it must have some merit that I have yet to understand.”

“Pinkie and I were talking,” Maud said slowly, pulling her own chair closer. “Maybe you’re trying too hard to be funny the way Pinkie is.”

“You are implying that there may be different types of amusement? Intriguing. I have only understood physical comedy and jokes. However, neither one of them is something in which I show proficiency.”

“It’s true,” Pinkie said. “She didn’t laugh at any of my jokes!”

Maud rubbed her chin. “Tell her one.”

“Uh, okay, if you say so.” Pinkie paused to think of one. “Ooh, okay! A big, wild cat with spots tried to enter the Equestria Games, but they wouldn’t let him compete because he was a cheetah! Tee hee!”

Maud shrugged and then looked to Turing, whose ears were twitching noisily.

“Because the word ‘cheetah’ is similar to the word ‘cheater.’ I understand, though I do not find it funny.”

Pinkied sighed.

“Furthermore--”

“No! No furthermore!” Pinkie cried, waving her hooves frantically. But then Maud put her hoof on Pinkie’s shoulder.

“Let her finish,” Maud said.

Pinkie’s eyes darted between Maud and Turing. “You sure, Maud?”

“I want to know what she thinks.” She looked to Turing. “Go ahead.”

Turing held out a hoof. “I was thinking that it would be logical regardless of honesty, as wild animals are not normally considered as candidates for competition in such an event. Of course the cheetah would be quite proficient at sprinting events if his handlers were able to prevent him from mauling the other contestants. Even then, allowing wild animals would set a negative precedent for the Games. After all, there would be no point in competing if one were allowed to enter, for example, an elephant into a weight-lifting competition. And that is to say nothing of the hazards to the other competitors not only from possible attacks but also from the difficulties of providing the animals with lodging and also from slipping on the track should one of the animals defe--”

“Rinny, stop stop stop! I can’t take any more!” Pinkie cried. “You see, Maud, she just--”

There was a sound. A snort? A sneeze? Pinkie froze and slowly turned toward her sister. There was a very small curve at the corner of her lips and she held a hoof in front of her mouth.

“Maud? Did… did you just snicker?”

Her eyes shifted away. “Maybe.”

Pinkie grabbed Turing and started to shake her. “Rinny, you broke my sister! Your joke-killing abilities drove her crazy!”

Then she felt a hoof on her shoulder and saw that Maud’s expression was slowly returning to normal. “Pinkie, it’s fine.”

Pinkie breathed a sigh of relief as she smiled at her. “Whew! You had me worried. But what happened to you, Maud?”

“I apologize, Maud Pie,” Turing said, bowing her head slightly. “I did not mean--”

“No, don’t apologize,” she said sternly, and then looked to Pinkie. “Pinkie… she’s funny.”

“Huh? She is?”

“I am?”

“No she’s not!”

“Apparently I am not.”

Maud shook her head, holding up her hoof for them to be quiet. “Turing, maybe you should try telling a joke of your own.”

“Do you believe that is a good idea? I have memorized many jokes, although none of them are ones that I find humorous and my previous attempts at delivery were quite poor.”

“Tell one anyway.”

Turing tilted her head, but complied with Maud’s request. “There were three peanuts walking through a bad neighborhood in Manehattan. One was assaulted.”

Pinkie chuckled. Maud frowned.

“I believe the source of the humor is--”

“Rinny, don’t explain the joke,” Pinkie told her, rolling her eyes.

“Hold on,” Maud said. “No, do explain it.”

“But Maud, you’re not--” She fell silent when Maud glanced over at her. If there was any subtle change in her expression, only Pinkie saw it, but it was enough to silence her. She looked back at Turing and nodded.

“If you insist. I believe the joke is intended to be humorous because the word ‘assaulted’ is auditorily identical to the phrase ‘a salted,’ which is what many peanuts are: salted. This double-meaning of course ignores the obvious absurdities of the joke. Peanuts lack independent locomotion and thus would be incapable of walking anywhere. Were one to ignore this feature of peanut physiology, that still begs the question of why the unfortunate peanut would be assaulted. Physically, I mean, not in the sense of being covered in salt.

“Perhaps the peanut was carrying valuables that Manehattan thieves desired, though how a peanut came to be financially stable is even more puzzling. What skills would a peanut possess that would be of value to an employer? However, if we assume that this peanut is indeed capable of holding a job, then perhaps he lives in some alternate reality where this is a normal occurrence.

“That opens us to the possibility that the peanut was attacked not for his valuables but was instead targeted merely for being a peanut in a neighborhood where attitudes toward his kind were hostile. Perhaps this hypothetical world is filled with other sentient nuts and racism between them exists. The peanut may have been attacked by cashews or a gang of tough young macadamias. Were this to be the case, then one would have to exercise caution when making one’s own way in this nutty world.”

At last Turing stopped when she noticed that Pinkie was actually starting to crack a smile and Maud Pie was not only smiling but chuckling. Indeed, she was obviously holding her laughter in, and it was still quiet and unlike the uproarious laughter Pinkie Pie had, but she was still barely containing it through clenched teeth as she shook.

“Okay, Maud, you’re right,” Pinkie managed to say through her giggles. “That was actually pretty silly.”

“Silly?” Turing asked, holding out a hoof. “That is not silly. I have merely stated the natural analysis of the joke.”

“T-tell another,” Maud said, still holding her laughter in.

“What joke should I tell?”

Maud breathed in, getting herself under control. “Pinkie said you read a lot of jokes. Tell one of your own.”

“That should be possible. I have analyzed the numerous patterns of the jokes. Perhaps if I extrapolated the patterns I could conceive of a joke that would fit within the parameters of what you may find funny. Very well. Processing...”

Pinkie and Maud leaned forward.

“Process complete. Here is my joke:
“Starswirl the Bearded walks into a malt shop. The stallion minding the counter and the other patrons all run screaming from the malt shop because Starswirl the Bearded has been dead for a thousand years and it is normal to fear the undead.”

The two sisters laughed.

“I do not understand. Why are you laughing? I have merely tried to take the pattern of the joke and apply logic to it. While I am glad of your amusement, I do not understand it.”

“Rinny, remember when I said jokes were supposed to be unexpected?” Pinkie asked between her giggles.

“I do.”

“That’s why your jokes are funny! I expect something funny at the end and it isn’t!”

Turing stared back at her. “You are saying I am funny because I am not funny?”

“Exactly!” Pinkie cheered. “In fact… I just got a great idea!” She rubbed her hooves together as a sly grin spread across her face.

***

Pinkie finished her milkshake and licked her lips clean of excess whipped cream.

Turing and Maud were still sitting at the table watching her.

“Mmm, that was great!” Then her eyes went wide. “Ooh, wait, I just got another great idea! This one actually has to do with Rinny’s joke telling!”

***

Twilight and Spike briskly walked toward their destination early that evening. The building was a wooden structure with a big hoof-painted sign over the door. Twilight looked up, raising an eyebrow at it.

Mad Salt!
Ponyville’s Largest (and Only) Salt Lick Saloon!

“Wow, I’ve never been in a place like this,” Spike said, his eyes lighting up excitedly.

“That’s because most ponies wouldn’t take a baby dragon to a saloon,” Twilight said, scowling at the rough-looking establishment.

“Yeah, but most ponies don’t know any baby dragons!” he said, shrugging it off as he approached the stairs. “Besides, the note Pinkie left on the castle said she and Turing Test would be here!”

Twilight was about to pull him back with her magic when he exclaimed “Hey, Twilight, come look at this!”

She trotted over and her eyes went wide as she saw the sign next to the door. It was a chalkboard sign but it had been emblazoned with large letters which read: ‘Tonight’s Live Entertainment: Robot & Pie!’

“Robot & Pie?” Twilight and Spike both said in unison.

From inside, uproarious laughter suddenly thundered out, causing them both to stagger back.

“Okay, Spike, you can come in. I just hope it doesn’t get too rough in there…”

The two of them entered and saw that the pub was crowded with all sorts of ponies crowded around tables enjoying their salt lick. The place was so packed that they had a hard time getting through and Twilight had to place Spike on her back just so he could see. They gingerly pushed past several patrons, none of whom bothered to look at her long enough to realize who she was. The low lighting in the place didn’t help either.

“Hey, there they are!” Spike exclaimed, jumping onto her head and pointing with one claw.

Twilight followed where he was pointing at saw that in the center of the saloon, sitting on a pair of stools, were Pinkie Pie and Turing. Twilight didn’t hear what Pinkie had just said, but the crowd around her all laughed at once. Many of them cheered, whistled, or stomped their hooves in applause.

“Twilight. Spike.”

Twilight whirled around at the unmistakably bland voice and saw that Maud Pie was sitting at her own table and beckoning her over as well. She went over, Spike in tow, and took a seat, putting Spike on the table so he could see as well.

“Maud, I’m glad to see you!” Twilight said brightly. “And a little surprised. Can you tell me what’s going on?”

“Pinkie and Turing Test are doing a comedy act.”

“Wait, both of them? Turing couldn’t even tell a joke this morning!” Twilight exclaimed.

Maud took a sip from a glass of water. “She still can’t.” Then she smiled ever so slightly. “But she’s really good at not telling jokes.”

She crinkled her nose and eyed the various chunks of salt lick that the various ponies had on their tables suspiciously.

“You’re sure nopony put something in the salt lick to make them laugh?” Twilight whispered.

Maud nodded. “Pretty sure.”

Twilight had no idea what was going on, so she finally just turned her attention to the pair in the center of the room.

“So, you know, Rinny,” Pinkie began, leaning forward on her tall stool, causing it to wobble, “I went to my doctor and he said ‘You’re eating too much sugar!’”

“What did you do?”

“I told him I wanted a second opinion! He said, ‘Okay, your hair’s too poofy too!’”

A smattering of laughter went through the crowd.

“Ah, I see that he misunderstood your meaning. Rather than understanding that you wished to discuss the matter with another physician, he chose to offer another opinion of his own.”

Twilight was about to groan but she heard others in the crowd chuckle.

“This of course was not what you meant and indicative of a poor understanding of common terminology on his part. Furthermore, his personal criticism of your appearance should not be tolerated and you should report him for unprofessional conduct. Though, in fairness, your hair’s poofiness is in excess of normal parameters.”

The crowd’s laughter grew. Twilight couldn’t believe her ears and glanced around at all the laughing audience members. “Wait, Maud,” she whispered, “why are they laughing at her explaining the joke?”

“Because nopony expects her to explain it.” Maud blinked at her slowly. “That is the joke.”

Twilight shook her head. “Wait, how does that even--”

“Shh, it’s Turing’s turn now.” She put her hoof to Twilight’s lips, cutting her off.

“Pinkie Pie, do you know what the difference is between an elephant and a plum?”

“Gee, Rinny, I don’t know,” Pinkie said with an exaggerated shrug.

“Plums are purple.”

The crowd chuckled at that. Spike and Twilight glanced at each other. “Uh, am I crazy, or is that not funny?” Spike asked.

“You’re not crazy,” Twilight muttered, her expression going sour. “Are they making fun of her?”

Turing continued: “Pinkie Pie, do you know what Daring Do said when she saw the elephants coming?”

“I sure don’t!” Pinkie replied.

“She said ‘Here come the elephants.’”

Several groans came from the crowd and even Pinkie rolled her eyes. “Rinnyyy, that’s not--”

“Pinkie Pie, do you know what Dr. Caballeron said when he saw the elephants coming?”

Pinkie sighed. “Lemme guess: ‘Here come the elephants.’ Right?”

“No,” Turing said with a shake of her head. “He said ‘Here come the plums.’”

The crowd murmured in confusion, Twilight and Spike included. Maud leaned forward expectantly.

Just when it seemed that Turing’s joke had fallen flat she suddenly uttered “...Because Dr. Caballeron is colorblind.”

The crowd burst out laughing, some hard enough to fall off their seats. Groans were heard, but they were good-natured and another round of applause went through.

Even Twilight and Spike shared a chuckle. “Okay, that’s kind of funny,” Twilight admitted. “Ridiculous, but funny.”

“She’s been doing this with Pinkie Pie for almost an hour now,” Maud said. “Pinkie knows the mare who owns the place. She says that she might make enough in tips to finish paying for the chairs Turing broke.”

Twilight looked over to the pair of them and then back to Spike. He didn’t notice and his boyish laugh could be heard even among all the other ponies’ laughs. In spite of all the silliness, she had to admit it was actually great to see Turing make ponies laugh in her own way, odd as it might be. She sat back in her chair, ordered a block of salt, and relaxed until the end of the show.

***

When the show had ended and most of the saloon patrons had gone home, the group of them all gathered around a table. Twilight couldn’t keep herself from gushing.

“I can’t believe it! Everypony was just laughing like crazy!” Twilight exclaimed. She set her elbows on the table, resting her head on one hoof. “It’s amazing! You managed to turn your lack of understanding of jokes into a comedy routine!”

“That is partially true, Twilight Sparkle.” Turing pointed to Maud. “Maud Pie was the first to suggest that my own method of attempting humor could be put to better use.”

Maud blinked as the others looked to her. “I thought she was pretty funny. I told Pinkie to give her a chance.” She shrugged.

“Maud’s right!” Pinkie said, nodding her head rapidly. She put one foreleg around Turing. “At first, Rinny was all ‘I-am-a-robot. What-is-it-that-makes-organic-ponies-laugh? Beep-boop-beep.’”

Twilight curled her lip and then opened her mouth, ready to admonish her.

“And also Pinkie Pie was all ‘Questions you’re not supposed to answer! Rhyming words, non-sequitur, improbable amounts of pastry!’ But then we reached an understanding.”

Twilight sat frozen, her mouth still hanging open. Spike began to snicker.

“You two… you…” Twilight managed to stammer, shaking her head in disbelief. “How did you get so in sync with each other?”

“We rehearsed,” Turing replied.

“Rehearsed?” Twilight repeated, still gawking at the pair of them.

The two turned to look at each other and then back to Twilight in unison, though only Pinkie wore a broad grin. Without even looking, the two bumped hooves perfectly.

“See, Rinny’s actually pretty funny, but we had to work it out so that ponies could come and actually enjoy a show! So we tried out a bunch of different gags and keep the ones that worked! That’s where yours truly came in!” She thumped her own chest proudly. “We rehearsed a bit, told some jokes, and after about an hour, we were ready to perform!”

“Just an hour?” Spike asked, his eyes going wide. “How’d you get ready so fast?”

“I have a perfect memory. Pinkie Pie has similarly high retention. One rehearsal was all that was required.”

“Can’t memorize everypony’s birthday without a good noggin!” Pinkie added, knocking on her own head and producing a distinct coconut-like sound.

Twilight blinked. “So… wow.” Her amazement gave way to a peaceful smile and she reached out, placing her hoof on Turing’s. “You really did it, Turing. You finally achieved your goal of understanding humor.”

“In a manner of speaking, Twilight Sparkle.” Turing looked down slightly. “I have gained greater understanding about what it means to make other ponies laugh and even sufficient understanding to grasp jokes, though not without some difficulty. However, I still have no feeling of amusement, nor does it seem that I spontaneously laugh.”

Everypony’s face fell slightly. Pinkie pulled Turing in even closer. “Rinny… I’m sorry.”

“Please do not apologize, Pinkie Pie.” Turing put her hoof on her shoulder and looked her in the eye. “One of my goals was to understand humor and use it more adeptly. I believe your expertise was invaluable toward achieving this goal. Thank you.”

Pinkie’s frown faded slightly. “Aw, it was no biggie!”

“Also, Maud Pie,” Turing said, looking to her, “I must thank you. Your recognition of my own means of expressing humor enabled Pinkie and I to repair our relationship. It is my hope that both you and your sister will accept my offer of friendship. Do you?”

Pinkie nearly hit the ceiling in her jump for joy. “Woohoo! Bestest robot pony best friend ever!”

Turing continued looking to Maud, who made her reply: “Okay then.” Her tiny half-smile returned and Turing gave a slight nod.

“Acknowledged.”

Spike leaned over to Twilight. “Oh sweet Celestia, there are two of them,” he whispered through his teeth.

“Spike, be polite,” Twilight whispered back. More loudly, she told the group, “Listen: Maud, Pinkie, why don’t let me do you a favor and pay for your salt and any drinks you had here. It’s the least I could do for you both after helping Turing so much!”

The Pie sisters looked to each other and shrugged. Looking back at Twilight they nodded, each giving her a small smile.

“Great! Let me check with the barkeep!” She got off of her stool and was about to make her way to the bar when Turing noticed a stray glass that had been knocked off of a nearby table. Twilight was about to step on it. Turing was on her hooves in a second, but that was still too long to prevent what happened next.

Twilight stepped on the glass, which did not shatter, but instead rolled backward, forcing Twilight to trip and stumble forward. Off balance, she opened her wings reflexively and her forward stumbling gave her enough momentum to lift into the air. She sailed out of control across the room, her shout of surprise ending when she blew right past some ponies playing darts and embedded her horn straight into their dartboard.

“Twilight!” Spike shouted, rushing over alongside her other friends.

“I’m okay, I’m okay!” Twilight called, pushing her back hooves against the wall the dartboard was hanging on. She tried to pull her horn out, but suddenly the entire dartboard came loose and she fell to the floor directly on her rump. She lifted her head dazily and they saw that she had her horn stuck directly through the center.

Pinkie giggled and opened her mouth to say something.

“Bullseye.”

The group whirled around to see that Turing was staring at Twilight. Once what she had said sunk in, the group of them relaxed and shared a mutual laugh.

“Well, guess you’re getting better at comedic timing,” Twilight grunted, trying to push the dartboard off her horn. Maud walked over and easily yanked it free with a single hoof.

“Bullseye. Like a dart. Twilight Sparkle was like a dart. That was funny,” Turing commented.

“Apparently,” Twilight said, rolling her eyes.

“That was... funny.”

Twilight blinked and stared at her. She saw that Turing’s eyes had contracted again and she had a strange, almost far-off gaze as her ears went straight up.

“Oh my gosh… Turing, do you mean?”

“Yes.” She looked to each of them as they stared at her. “That was funny to me. I made a joke and understood it based on the observation of Twilight’s situation and… I felt amused. I felt it. This is…”

“R-Rinny?” Pinkie Pie asked, coming over to her. She placed her hooves over her mouth, her eyes beginning to well up. “You… you really mean it?”

“I do.” She tilted her head back. “This feeling. It is wonderful. It is so wonderful.” She moved over to Pinkie and hugged her. "So light and energetic. This is why organics laugh."

“Oh… Rinny!” She hugged her back and then motioned for the others to join her. “Aww… group hug initiated!”

***

The group walked through the streets of Ponyville until they got to Sugarcube Corner. Standing outside the cake- and candy-camouflaged building, the group all faced each other in silence, nopony quite sure what to say.

“So, even though you can finally think things are funny,” Pinkie ventured cautiously, “you still can’t laugh?”

“It seems not. Though I could run simulations and create a more realistic personal laugh from composite data, it would not be a spontaneous natural reaction. But you need not worry. I am content with my progress.”

Pinkie sighed, but offered her a smile.

“It was nice meeting you, Turing Test,” Maud said suddenly, startling everypony out of their silence. She walked over and gave her new friend one final hug. “You’re really interesting. I think I’ll write a poem about you.”

Twilight gawked. “Wait. Maud, you’re going to write a poem that isn’t about rocks?!”

“I never said I wouldn’t,” Maud said with a shrug. “I just didn’t know any ponies as interesting as rocks.”

“Thank you, Maud Pie. I also compare you favorably with a rock.”

Maud looked away, suddenly rubbing one of her forelegs with the other. Pinkie raised an eyebrow and leaned in with a sideways glance as she detected the faintest change in color in Maud’s gray cheeks.

Then her eyes suddenly went wide and everypony gave a start as she let out a yelp.

“Oh no! Maud, we have to go! I just realized we left Gummy and Boulder alone together all day! And you know how they get when that happens!”

“Hm. We better go.” She waved as she slowly turned and moved toward the building with all the speed and urgency of cold molasses.

“Why, what’s the ‘rush?’” Spike asked sarcastically, raising an eyebrow.

“Wellll,” Pinkie said leaning in and blushing slightly, “I just don’t want to wait a week and find that one of them is ‘in a family way,’ if you know what I mean.”

Twilight blinked. “You’re worried that an alligator and a rock will… breed?”

“Well, of course!” Pinkie scoffed. “Where do you think cragadiles come from?”

And with that, she zipped away, disappearing into Sugarcube Corner without another word.

“She… that’s not really possible, is it?” Twilight asked Turing.

“Probably not. Both Gummy and Boulder are male.”

“What? That’s the least reason why that wouldn’t--”

She froze when she saw Turing’s ears twitching again.

“You’re joking with me.” She smiled, a laugh escaping her as she shook her head. “You’re trying to be silly, aren’t you?”

“Perhaps this rimshot subroutine will answer your question, Twilight Sparkle: Ba-dum-ting.”

Spike chuckled at that while Twilight just rolled her eyes. “Okay, Turing, that’s enough. Let’s go home and hope that the next time you find something funny it doesn’t involve me slipping and skewering a dartboard.”

The three of them trotted back toward the castle, Spike and Twilight each yawning in turn as they went.

“Twilight Sparkle, Spike the Dragon, are you both fatigued?”

Twilight nodded and looked over to her wearily. “Yes. We had a big day today in Canterlot.”

“Was your meeting with Celestia productive?”

Spike and Twilight looked to each other and they each smiled. “Yes, it was,” Twilight said. “It looks like we won’t have to fight to keep you here, Turing.”

“That is good.” She raised her head slightly, taking in the sight of the castle as it loomed ever larger on the horizon. “Many things happened to me today. I gained new insights. I felt things that were terrible and things that were wonderful. And I managed to analyze what it was that I felt two days ago when you said you would not send me away.”

“You did?” Twilight asked, whipping her head around, eyes wide and eager in spite of her tiredness. “What was it?”

“I believe it was ‘relief.’” She did not take her eyes off the castle as they continue walking. “My experiences have given me greater understanding of organic ponies. When you are more rested, I will relate them to you, if you wish. Now, more than ever, I am glad to be here.”

To be continued...

Deep Blue, Part 1

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“...So that’s what’s going on now, Applejack,” Twilight said. “And that’s why there’s no reason to worry about Turing Test.”

Twilight and Applejack were making their way down the road in Ponyville. The pair were picking up supplies from the stores and the outdoor market. Applejack had been busy preparing for the fall harvest lately and Twilight had finally caught up to her five days after Maud had left Ponyville to talk about what had happened with Turing Test, Fine Print, and all the other things that had happened.

“Well… all right, I admit I’m a little less worried now that I know what’s been goin’ on, Twilight.” She hesitated, glancing sideways at her. “Now, yer sure that Gadget removed the codes from Turing Test? She ain’t under nopony’s control no more?”

“Absolutely! And after my meeting with Princess Celestia, I’ve made it even clearer to Turing that she isn’t to harm anypony. She’s safe! As gentle as a newborn foal!”

“An’ what about… you know, the other stuff?”

Twilight raised her eyebrow. “The… ‘other’ stuff?”

Applejack narrowed her eyes. “Like, that she don’t actually like nopony?”

“Ah.” Twilight sighed. This was the part of the conversation she’d been dreading. “Look, I’ve talked to our other friends about it and I’ve decided that even if Turing can’t feel affection just yet, she still cares for me and her other friends. She genuinely appreciates having friends and is grateful to know Rainbow Dash, Rarity, and now Pinkie Pie too! Not to mention Bulk Biceps, Scootaloo, Maud…”

“All right, all right, I get yer point.” Applejack sighed. “Look, I ain’t sayin’ no.” She took off her hat, raising her head solemnly. “After all, I’m a pony o’ my word, and I said I’d try to make friends with her if you did and now it’s pretty clear it’s just me’n Fluttershy that ain’t made friends with her. Though I’d feel a little better if she made a little peace with Fluttershy first, to be honest. After that, sure, I’ll get to know ‘er.” She replaced her hat, then shifted her saddlebags, grunting with a slight wince on her face as she did so.

“Um, Applejack, are you okay?” Twilight frowned, glancing back at the saddlebags. “You’re moving kind of slow today and you keep making faces like you’re in pain.”

“Nah, it’s nothin’.” She waved a hoof dismissively. “Probably just carryin’ a bit too much.”

Twilight blinked and her frown deepened. “Applejack, those bags are pretty full, but I’ve seen you carry more. Lots more.”

“Yeah, but I’m tired after the early fall harvest. Fall’s the best time fer apples, ya know.” She sighed. “Look, I admit I ain’t been feelin’ at my best, but it ain’t nothin’ to fret, so don’t you worry ‘bout a thing. Let’s just get our shoppin’ finished so we’ll be good and ready fer Nightmare Night.”

Twilight shrugged, but then she smiled. “All right, if you say so. Just do me a favor and take it easy, okay?”

Applejack tipped her hat. “Will do.”

“All right. Now let’s get some…” She stopped, noticing that Applejack had lagged behind her and was staring off at something. “Huh? What is… whoa.” She’d followed Applejack’s gaze and spotted what she was looking at.

“Hoowee, lookie there, Twi.” Applejack couldn’t help but grin and even Twilight felt her heart skip a beat.

Standing nearby the Carousel Boutique was a stallion with a gleaming white coat, and a dirty blonde mane. He was exceptionally tall, nearly twice the size of a normal stallion, muscular but proportioned, with large brown eyes, a chiseled jaw, and legs like stone pillars. On his flank was a golden sword laid across a golden shield.

“Who is that?” Twilight asked. She composed herself. “I mean, if he’s new to Ponyville, maybe we should go say hi.”

“Pretty handsome lookin’ guy. Tall drink o’ water too, ain’t he? Makes Big Mac look almost normal-sized. But it looks like he’s in a hurry.” She frowned as he turned and quickly trotted in the opposite direction, turning down an alleyway. She sighed as she watched him go.

“Well, maybe we’ll see him around and get another chance to say hello,” Twilight said. She smiled and tapped Applejack on the shoulder, getting her attention. “Let’s finish our shopping. We can check out guys later.”

“Alright, alright,” Applejack said, returning the smile. “He was too tall fer me anyhow. I like a fella I don’t have to strain my neck to look at.”

The two shared a laugh as they continued, putting the stranger out of mind.

***

Rarity frowned and rubbed her chin, almost pouting at the flowing white gown on the dress form in front of her. “Oh, I just don’t know. It still seems so old fashioned.” She sighed. “I really think we might want to modernize the look a bit. It might as well be a toga!”

The mint green mare next to her giggled. “You’re being too harsh on yourself! The other musicians are going to love it! Well, maybe the stallions wouldn’t.” She elbowed Rarity, giving her a sly sideways glance.

The two of them were in the Carousel Boutique. Lyra Heartstrings and Rarity were both in the upcoming Ponyville Music Festival and Rarity had agreed to design some dresses for Lyra’s group. It was late and Rarity had closed the boutique for the meeting.

Rarity rolled her eyes at Lyra’s joke, but smiled. “Really, Lyra, you’re too kind. I suppose they’re acceptable… mmmaybe just a little pink trim, some lace for accents. And yes, of course, I’ll have something else for the gentlecolts in your ensemble.”

Lyra nodded and looked more closely at the gown, squinting her eyes at it. “I guess some trim would be fine. But nothing too showy. Besides, I’m--” Just then, her belly growled, loud enough to wake up Opal from where she slept in the corner. Her cheeks flushed, she hid her face behind a raised foreleg.

“I suppose we have been discussing the Festival a bit late,” Rarity said. She offered her a smile. “Should we call it a night?”

“No, no, it’s fine!” Lyra insisted. Her belly rumbled again.

Rarity chuckled. “Very well, but I insist you get a snack. You can follow through the back room to my kitchen. Help yourself, please!”

Lyra grinned. “Thanks, Rarity!” And with that, she rushed through the back way, out of the showroom floor.

Rarity again inspected the gown and was about to take out her sketchbook to plot some redesigns when she heard a light knock at her front door. She whirled around and saw two figures sitting just outside. She came closer and looked out. It was hard to see them in the darkness outside, but there was a mare and a stallion.

“I’m dreadfully sorry, but we’re closed!” Rarity called. “If you would be so kind as to call tomorrow--”

“Please, Miss,” the stallion said, coming closer to the door. He wore a grin and gestured to the mare behind him. “My mistress only wishes for a few moments of the famous Miss Rarity’s time.”

Rarity smiled at that. “Well, if it is just a few moments, then I suppose I could.”

She unlatched the door and the odd pair walked in.

The stallion was the same white-coated, blonde-maned stallion Twilight and Applejack had seen earlier. Over his chest and upper forelegs he wore a coat of armor which was shining like steel but had a black tint to it. The tall stallion had to duck his head as he entered. He looked down at Rarity with a calm smile and brown eyes. “Thank you,” he said, his voice a rich bass.

The mare shared her partner’s coat and mane colors, though Rarity could only see a small amount of her mane peeking out from under the dark blue nun’s habit she wore. The garment draped over her ears and down the back of her neck. The habit had a steel plate across the front, displaying an emblem with the image of a unicorn with a flowing mane and curving horn and pointed fangs, (a detail that did not escape Rarity’s keen eye). On her flank was the image of a few chess pieces, specifically a pawn, a knight, and a queen. She had a similar calm smile on her lips. Curiously, she had her eyes closed, though this did not prevent her from turning her head toward Rarity.

“Miss Rarity!” she called out. She drew her name out in one melodious breath, her voice high and lilting. “We have a task for you.” She stepped forward as the stallion turned his head.

“Well,” Rarity began, “if I am able, I’d be glad to…”

The mare’s eyes opened. From them came a glowing, deep blue light. Rarity stared at them, her pupils dilating and her body going stiff. Her mouth hung open and she slowly sat down. Her eyes clouded over and she was still, her breathing becoming slow and shallow.

“There’s a good child,” the mare said, her placid smile in place. She leaned in closer, holding Rarity’s chin up with one hoof. “We have an invitation for you, my dear. We…”

She paused. “Oh dear.” She closed her eyes and turned to face her companion. “Glory, dear, there’s a unicorn in the kitchen,” she whispered. “Would you retrieve her?”

“Of course, Grace,” he whispered back, nodding to her. He turned and went out the front door, going around the back.

Lyra was in the kitchen quickly fixing a sandwich, oblivious to what was happening in the showroom, when she heard a clattering sound at the back door. She peeked around the corner and there in full view was the stallion, Glory, towering over her and slowly approaching her. He had a calm smile, but his eyes were narrow and fixed on her.

“What? Who are you?!” she cried, backing up. “R-Rarity! Someone’s broken in!” she yelled over her shoulder. There was no response and she turned back to the approaching intruder.

“Don’t be frightened, now,” he said, his deep voice reverberating in Rarity’s small kitchen. “Go to the front room.”

“What are you doing here?” Lyra demanded. “Are you a burglar? I-Is this a robbery? What do you want?”

Her heart pounding as she continually backed away from Glory, she searched around for something to defend herself. Her eyes darted around the kitchen and she spotted a cast iron skillet hanging on the wall and quickly used her magic to levitate it over to herself and held it up in front of her.

“Don’t come any closer!” she yelled, staring up at him. She swallowed. “I… I mean it!”

He only raised an eyebrow and gave a snort.

Her back to the wall, she looked around and saw no way out. Giving one final scream, she swung the heavy skillet at him and struck him upside the head, the edge of it smashing him right in the temple, a gong sound echoing through the empty house.

The blow should have knocked him to the floor, but Glory only smiled. He didn’t even budge or flinch at the blow, as if the heavy weapon were no more than a gentle breeze.

Gasping, her blood going cold and her lower lip quivering, Lyra huddled against the back wall and let the skillet drop. Glory caught it and held it vertically between two hooves.

“Go to the front room,” he repeated. Without even the slightest grunt or straining, he pressed his hooves together, folding the heavy iron skillet in half like a sheet of paper. He let it drop, clattering to the tile floor. “Now.”

Lyra, eyes tearing up, nodded slowly. She gingerly stepped back to the front room, glancing back at Glory as he followed her. When she returned, she saw Rarity slumped over, the strange mare, Grace, sitting in front of her.

Grace’s eyes were still closed, but she still turned to look directly at her. “Oh, Glory, you naughty thing! You’ve frightened her half to death!” she chortled, holding a hoof over her mouth demurely. She then beckoned Lyra slowly with one hoof. “Come here, child.”

Lyra did so. “P-please, I don’t know what you want,” she said, choking back a sob.

“I only want to know one thing: are you a friend of Twilight Sparkle?” Grace asked.

“Huh? Oh, well… yes, although I knew her better when I used to live in Canterlot…”

Grace’s smile slowly crept into a tight-lipped rictus. “Then we shall invite you to our little party as well.” Grace opened her eyes and Lyra’s fears melted away. Everything seemed to fade as she lost herself in that gaze. There was no more showroom, no more emotion, and no more thought.

There were only the words...

***

The next day, it was the afternoon before Nightmare Night. Bon Bon was busy in her kitchen, busily making batch after batch of candy. She’d already sold a bundle to be distributed to the eager colts and fillies who’d be going door to door. She smiled as she took a deep whiff of the caramels cooling on the countertop.

“I just love Nightmare Night!” she exclaimed, mostly to herself.

Which of course meant that she nearly jumped out of her skin when Lyra, who’d been watching from the doorway, said “Me too.”

“Lyra, jeez!” Bon Bon whirled around, but her hard eyes softened when she saw Lyra giggling.

“Sorry, sorry. Anyway, tonight should be a lot of fun!” Lyra went over to a bowl of newly wrapped taffy pieces. She levitated one up, preparing to unwrap it, licking her lips as she did so.

“Ah ah!” Bon Bon said, glaring at her as she caught the taffy in midair. “Come on, Lyra, these are for the foals!”

Lyra’s lower lip quivered and she turned her head, looking up at her with a pout. “Not even one?”

“Not even…” She paused, again softening. “All right, all right, you win. Take it.” She let go and Lyra eagerly unwrapped and quickly devoured the sweet.

“Mm! Sho anyway, I wash shinking,” she paused, chewing the sticky treat before swallowing, “that we could go catch a scary movie before nightfall, then go dance off the adrenaline at the big Nightmare Night Ball at City Hall!”

“Sounds great! I’m glad I decided to just take orders instead of running a stall this year. It’ll be nice to relax and let other ponies handle the candy selling!” She went to fetch more wrapping paper and pretended not to hear Lyra steal another piece of candy. “Hey, I was thinking maybe we could do the haunted walk through Ponyville Park around midnight this year! Should be pretty scary.”

“I can’t.”

Bon Bon frowned at her as she returned. “Why not? Think you’ll be too tired?”

“I have plans.”

Bon Bon looked at her more closely. Lyra’s expression changed ever so slightly. She was still smiling but there was something in her eyes…

“Um, what kind of plans?” she asked, glancing sideways at Lyra.

“Just a scavenger hunt. I can’t say more,” Lyra replied, blinking several times.

“Well, that sounds fun. Can I come?”

“No.”

Bon Bon’s eyes popped open at Lyra’s firm, abrupt answer. “What? Just ‘no?’ Why not?!”

Lyra’s eyes were glassy and they seemed to gaze right past her. Her smile seemed forced, as if glued on. “You are not invited.”

“What? ‘Not invited?’ But Lyra, why not?” She put a hoof to her chest and frowned at her. “I don’t understand, we said we would spend Nightmare Night together!”

Lyra’s left eye drifted off slightly. “You are not invited.”

Bon Bon froze. She swallowed and looked Lyra up and down. “Okay, Lyra,” she said slowly. “That’s all right. We can hang out until your scavenger hunt. Just tell me, when is it?”

Lyra’s gaze slowly returned to normal. “Oh. It’s… it’s 10 o’clock.” She scrunched her eyes shut and rubbed her temple. “Ow. My head hurts. I should go see the doctor; I’ve been getting the worst headaches lately.”

“Yeah. Good idea. Um, excuse me, Lyra, I need to go upstairs for something.” She turned to go and heard the sound of Lyra’s magic activating. “And don’t eat any more candy while I’m gone.”

“You got me, Bon Bon.” Lyra chuckled, putting down the taffy.

She trotted up the stairs of her house, through the hall, past Lyra’s room and then to her own. She shut the door and latched it before going over to her closet, opening it and shoving several boxes and things out of the way. She walked in a little, then glanced over her shoulder and saw her open window.

Better be sure, she said to herself. She went to the window, shut it, and closed the curtains. She went back across her darkened bedroom, into the closet, and pushed the clothes hangers aside and pressed her hooves to the back wall. She pushed in ever so slightly and shoved it upward, revealing the hidden compartment behind it. She locked it into place and examined the shelves.

Sitting on one shelf was an accordion folder. On another was a briefcase with the initials “SD” on it. She removed both of these and placed them on her bed. She unbuttoned the front flap of the accordion folder and found several smaller file folders inside. She flipped through the tags, mentally noting the names on them: Abbadon, Basilisk, Bugbear…

She smirked at that last one. A moment later, she found the files was looking for. “RMCA-210 and 211: Grace and Glory…” She flipped through the files. She’d seen symptoms like Lyra’s before. She’d seen them on the faces and in the eyes of dozens of victims in interrogation rooms and hospital wards. And that was just on those who were still able to talk at all.

She grit her teeth at the thought. She then went to the briefcase, opening it to reveal several brightly colored squares, spheres, and cubes. No doubt about it: she was going to need some of her special candy tonight. And there was something else she would need…

***

Twilight knocked on the door to Turing Test’s room.

“One moment.” Turing slowly opened the door just a crack. “Hello, Twilight Sparkle. Do you require my assistance? There are four minutes and eight seconds until today’s magic instruction, unless you wish to begin earlier.”

“No, no, nothing like that, Turing,” Twilight said, waving a hoof and shaking her head. “Could you come out please? I promise to look away if you want to keep your Nightmare Night costume a secret.”

“Understood.” She waited for Twilight to turn her head and then moved into the hallway, closing the door behind her. Pinkie Pie had told Turing that it was more fun to surprise your friends with your costume instead, so she wanted to go for the full effect. “What do you wish to discuss, Twilight Sparkle?”

“Well, first of all, I’m really impressed with your magic practice. You’re getting better and better at levitation and light manipulation. And it’s taking less and less time for you to see a spell and then try to replicate it without just flat-out copying me!”

“Abstraction is part of my higher cognitive function. I still lack your ability, however. For instance, I am unable to teleport.”

“Teleportation is very difficult anyway. And you’ve still learned a lot. A lot more than an organic pony could learn in so many weeks!” She smiled at her. “I want you to know that I’m proud of you.”

“Acknowledged.” Turing tilted her head to the side, then righted it. “Rectifying: Thank you.”

Twilight nodded. “But that’s not the main thing I wanted to talk to you about.”

Turing stood up straight looking at her directly. That was one good thing about Turing: Twilight never had to worry about having her attention.

“Turing, let’s talk a little bit about what happened with Pinkie Pie earlier this week.”

“Which event do you refer to?”

“I mean what you told me. About,” she swallowed, her smile fading, “about you getting angry.”

Turing’s ears twitched. “Your expressions and vital signs indicated agitation when I informed you of it. You did not comment at that time, however. I calculated this as a sign of indifference.”

“It wasn’t. I just wasn’t sure how to talk to you about it.” She sighed. “Look, first of all, Turing, I want you to know that I’m glad you didn’t do anything destructive.”

“As stated, I would never harm Pinkie Pie. I am in fact incapable of harming anypony, and will take extra precautions in light of your emphasis on Princess Celestia’s directive.”

Ever since her meeting with Celestia, Twilight had made sure to follow her guidelines. Turing was always with her or Spike whenever they went out, she’d informed Gadget and Vanderbull that they would need to share any findings with Celestia, and, above all, she made it clear to be extra careful about not harming anypony.

“That’s good. And I want you to know that I do trust you. Second of all, I want you to know something: it is okay to be angry.”

Turing cocked her head to the side. “I do not understand. Anger is a negative emotion. My actions were deleterious and frightened Pinkie Pie. That cannot be acceptable.”

“Yes, that’s true. But being angry is normal, at least for organic ponies.” She put her hoof on Turing’s shoulder. “I think it’s part of your own development to get angry sometimes. And I’m not disappointed with you for feeling that way. But I do want you to know that it’s important to control your temper when that happens.”

“My anger made me behave in counterproductive ways. It interfered with my judgment and I nearly alienated myself from Pinkie Pie instead of continuing my efforts to befriend her. I could set a subroutine that would cause me to shut down when I experienced anger again. That would prevent further negative actions.”

“No, Turing,” Twilight said, shaking her head. “That wouldn’t solve anything. I want you to learn to make good decisions no matter how you’re feeling. I know emotions can be overwhelming, but not having them is the opposite of what you’re trying to achieve. You were right to get some space from Pinkie Pie, but not to berate her. Next time you feel that way, try to be strong and ask yourself if you would make the same decision if you weren’t angry.”

Turing Test nodded. “Understood. I will attempt to preserve rationality during emotional states.”

“I’m really glad to hear that.” She smiled at her again and motioned for her to follow her. The two made their way toward the library for Turing’s next magic lesson. “Tonight’s Nightmare Night. This is a good chance to be seen by a lot of other citizens of Ponyville, especially children. Some of the ponies out there will be really nice!” She slowed and looked at Turing with a frown and somber eyes. “But not everypony. Some ponies might be afraid of you or say mean things. I know you don’t usually react to that, but if you do get upset, just stay calm and tell me or one of the others. We’ve got your back.”

“Acknowledged. I will do my best to interact and not be distracted by negative comments.”

“Good.” Twilight nodded and increased her pace as she led Turing onward. “Now let’s work on some other tricks. Some defensive spells for a change!” She paused. “Oh, I almost forgot. Rarity invited both of us on some mystery scavenger hunt with our other friends. That should be fun!”

***

Bon Bon walked over to the odd little dome-shaped building. Various gadgets and gizmos protruded from the lawn. Windmill-powered devices, odd doodads that looked like weathervanes, a veritable garden of hourglasses, clocks, and sundials, and a host of things she couldn’t even identify. She also noticed a strange statue sitting amongst them; a pegasus statue wearing a robe and covering its eyes. That was new.

She went to the door and knocked.

“Just a moment!” called the stallion inside.

Bon Bon sighed and sat down, hearing clattering and muttering coming from inside the dome. She looked around, examining the various devices and then looked over her shoulder to see that same statue…

Wait. She paused, squinting at it. Was it there before? It looks like it’s closer. And… it’s turned a little toward me?

She shook her head. My nerves are getting to me. I need to concentrate! She closed her eyes and rubbed them. But when she opened them again, she could swear that the statue was even closer, still covering its eyes.

Behind her, the sound of the iron door unlatching caught her attention and she turned to face the familiar brown earth pony stallion who called the place home.

“Ah! Miss Bon Bon!” he exclaimed in his Trottingham accent, a big smile on his face. “I didn’t expect to see you today! Well, come in, my friend. Both of you!” He turned to go back inside the house.

Bon Bon blinked. “Um, there’s only me here, Doc. Who else…” She turned around and screamed when she saw the face of a ferocious creature, the same statue, lunging at her! She fell back, foreleg raised defensively, staring up at its grimace, its outstretched hooves, its unsynchronized eyes…

“Wait. Derpy?!”

“Heehee, I got you, Bon Bon!” She laughed, dropping her threatening look. “Like my Nightmare Night costume? Doc helped me out with this special powder! When I cover myself with it, I look just like a statue, don’t I?”

Bon Bon responded by gasping for breath as she clutched her chest. “Jeez, I’ll say.” She took a deep breath, got to her hooves, and trotted inside.

As usual, the place was covered with all sorts of inventions. Machines and devices that did who-knows-what adorned the walls, the tables, even the floor. It wasn’t the first time Bon Bon had been there, but she still had to take a moment to look around the room, eyes wide and sparkling at the wondrous creations all over the Doctor’s lab.

“By the by, as long as you’re here,” he said, walking out from a nearby hallway, “perhaps you’d be so good as to give me your honest opinion of my costume?”

Bon Bon blinked and turned toward the Doctor’s voice. “That’s… what.”

The Doctor was wearing a costume that vaguely resembled an upside-down lightbulb, only it was green and speckled and had a large plastic leaf at the top…

“Doctor, are you a pear?”

“Exactly! My companion here insisted I just looked like some sort of upside-down speckled green lightbulb! Can you imagine?”

Derpy rolled her eyes.

“But why…”

“Why? My word, have you ever eaten a pear? Eugh!” He shuddered. “Ruddy awful things. Absolutely terrifying.”

“Look, um, Doctor, this is kind of an emergency,” Bon Bon said, narrowing her gaze as she walked over to him. “I need to discuss that little commission of yours.”

His smile faded. Then he forced it back into place and turned to Derpy. “Uh, so sorry, but would you please be a lamb and let us discuss something privately? It won’t take long.”

“Okey dokey, Doc!” she said, giving him a mock salute. She then took off and flew back outside, presumably to practice her statue pose some more.

“I never said I would finish it. It wasn’t finished when they shuttered the RMCA.”

Bon Bon’s hard eyes didn’t move. “I know.”

“Plus, you know,” he said, laughing nervously, adjusting the collar of his tie, “it’s not as if I was ever an agent.”

“Consultant. I know.” Bon Bon grinned ever so slightly. “But it’s not like you to leave something like that unfinished. Not after how obsessed you were with it.”

The Doctor was tight-lipped and his eyes shifted to the left and right. Finally he heaved a sigh. “All right, it’s done. Never had much call to use it, but it works.”

“Great. Where is it?”

“Hold on, I never said I would give it over,” he said, glaring at her. “You lot went under years ago. And you, if you’re going around hunting monsters again… that’s treason if Celestia ever finds out. You must be mad, digging around in the past, and believe me, I ought to know! What could be so--”

“Do you remember the Umbral Order?”

He froze and looked down at the floor. “Yes,” he said quickly. “Nasty bit of business there. Good thing they’ve gone now, isn’t it?”

He looked up to her with a smile and saw the scowl on her face.

“No…”

“Grace and Glory. I can’t be sure, but I can’t take the chance.” She swallowed and her gaze softened. “I’m seeing those old symptoms in my friend. I think she got to her.”

“Her? Who?”

Bon Bon stepped closer. “Lyra.”

The Doctor held up a hoof and went into the hallway. There was the sound of things moving and the clatter of different objects being shoved out of the way. When he returned, he carried a small brown box on his back. He gave it to her wordlessly.

Bon Bon smiled. “Thank you, Doctor.”

“If you see those two,” he said through gritted teeth. “You remind them why they left Equestria in the first place.”

Bon Bon nodded, taking the box and placing it in her saddlebag. She stared at the Doctor a moment… then erupted in a fit of giggles. “I’m… pfft, I’m sorry, but I can’t take you seriously when you’re dressed like that!”

“What? Oh, fantastic!” he groaned, throwing his hooves up. He pulled the costume off as Bon Bon trotted to the door. “By the way, enjoy your Nightmare Night! I’ll be passing out treats to the foals with my statuesque friend out there.” He paused. “Bon Bon.”

“Yes?” she asked, looking back over her shoulder.

“Just… stay safe.”

She gave him a smile and a short nod before walking out the door and into the soft orange glow of the setting sun.

***

Twilight paced back and forth outside her castle, waiting for her friends to show up. She was dressed in a blue wizard’s costume, complete with the conical hat. Not to mention a pair of spectacles hanging from a string hung around her neck. Since nopony had recognized her Starswirl the Bearded costume from last time, she hoped somepony would appreciate her Marey Plodder costume this time.

“I’m here, I’m here!” called a familiar voice. Twilight turned to see Rarity trotting over. She was wearing a silky red dress and when she came closer, she could see a pair of fangs protruding from her mouth.

“Ooh, vampire girl!” Twilight exclaimed, kicking her forelegs in the air. “That’s a great costume, Rarity!”

“Yes, though I wonder if this red dress is a bit too revealing.”

Twilight chuckled. “And if Applejack were here, she’d remind you--”

“--yes, yes, that ‘we don’t normally wear clothes.’” She rolled her eyes. “This from the pony who refuses to ever take off her hat.”

“Is Applejack coming on the scavenger hunt tonight, by the way?” Twilight asked, tensing up as she waited for the answer.

“Unfortunately, no.” She heaved a heavy sigh, dropping her head to look up at Twilight. “I practically begged her to come, but she said she was too busy managing her stall tonight. Caramel apples and bobbing for apples and no doubt some other apple-related things. Still, she said she would be glad to see us if we stopped by!”

“Well, that’s too bad. But I have some good news: Rainbow Dash can come tonight! She said she’d meet us for the scavenger hunt after, and I quote,” here she held up her hooves, making quotation marks with them, “‘some world-class pranking,’ end quote.”

“To be expected, I suppose. But still, that’s fantastic!” She smiled warmly. Then her eyes went wide. “Oh my… it’s a Nightmare Night miracle!”

Twilight turned to look and gasped. Fluttershy was walking over to them.

“Fluttershy?” Twilight gawked at her. “How… I thought you hated Nightmare Night!”

“Yes, and you told me there was no chance in Tartarus that you’d be coming out tonight!”

Fluttershy hid behind her long mane, smoothing it with her hooves. “Oh, w-well, I thought I should try to be brave. Even though I’m not. Because I’m shy. So very shy.”

Twilight and Rarity glanced at each other, then back to her. “Um… well, okay, if you think you can handle it,” Twilight said slowly, putting a hoof on her shoulder.

“Sure. Besides, I wanted to eat some candy.” She smiled up at the two of them. “I do love candy even though I’m shy. So very, very shy.”

“Well, glad you could join us,” Rarity said, looking her up and down. “Although I do wish you’d worn a costume.” She paused when she heard Fluttershy giggle, covering her mouth with both hooves.

She leaned in closely, narrowing her eyes. “Wait a minute… those eyes… they’re blue...” She gasped. “Pinkie Pie?!”

“Aww, you guessed!” said ‘Fluttershy’ in Pinkie’s voice. She reached into her hair and pulled out an orange cupcake with a pumpkin-shaped piece of candy on it. “I’ve been working on doing an impression of Fluttershy for months to get this right!”

“Wow, that’s a pretty good impression,” Twilight said breathlessly, still wide-eyed at how perfect her costume was… although now that she looked, she saw Pinkie’s poofy tail protruding from the back of her Fluttershy costume.

“Yes,” Rarity agreed, “you’d almost swear you two were the same pony!”

“Ha! That’s funny!” She took a bite of her cupcake. “Mm! So, where’s Rinny?”

“Well, she should be out any second,” Twilight replied, looking over at the castle doors. “Turing said she wanted to make sure it was perfect so she… oh, wait!”

They all turned and saw the castle door slowly open. They heard the whirr of Turing’s mechanical legs and saw as she stepped out, revealing her costume in the moonlight.

Twilight gawked, mouth hanging wide open. Rarity’s eye twitched. And Pinkie continued munching on her cupcake.

“Hello - everypony. Beep boop.”

“Darling… that’s… what are you wearing?” Rarity asked, just staring at her. Twilight, meanwhile, still hadn’t managed to close her mouth.

“I have utilized household items to fashion a costume. Is it satisfactory?”

Turing Test was wearing a brown cardboard box with red plastic cups for eyes and a rectangular slit for a mouth to create a mask. A bent clothes hanger protruded from the top to make an antenna. Flexible vent pipes adorned her legs.

“Turing,” Twilight finally managed to say, “did you… did you dress up as a robot for Nightmare Night?!”

“It - seemed - appropriate,” she said, resuming her exaggeratedly stiff speech mannerisms. “Pinkie - Pie - suggested - that - I - choose - a - costume - that - would - be - unexpected. Beep.”

“Turing Test, you are a robot!”

“Correct. I - am - a - robot - dressed - as - a - robot. Nopony - will - suspect - me. I - am - a - robot - in - disguise.”

Rarity leaned over to Twilight, never taking her eyes off Turing. “Did you know she was going to dress like that?”

Twilight tilted her head to the side. “No. I didn’t want to interfere. She seemed excited about her costume because she made it herself.”

“As excited as she can be, that is?”

“Exactly.” Twilight sighed, but offered Turing a smile. “It’s very nice, Turing. You ready to go?”

“Affirmative.” She turned to look at ‘Fluttershy.’ “Your costume is also adequate, Pinkie Pie.”

“Thanks, Rinny!” she said. “Yours is really good too!”

Twilight rapidly looked between the two of them. “Turing, how did you… oh never mind.” She rolled her eyes and led the small group off toward town.

***

“Come on over, everypony! We got bobbin’ fer apples over here!”

Applejack was at her little spot downtown, her usual wooden basin filled with water and apples, not to mention her caramel apples all lined up on a table nearby. She was dressed from head to hoof in a black and white striped prison jumpsuit with a rubber ball and chain on her hind leg for effect. She turned and saw her friends coming over and flashed a broad grin.

“Good gravy, Rarity and Twilight! Y’all look perfect!” She paused as the two came over and tapped her chin. “Let’s see… vampire and Marey Plodder?”

“Oh thank goodness someone got it!” Twilight cried, holding out a hoof and looking up to the heavens. “Everypony thinks I’m Starswirl the Bearded again and that I just forgot my beard!”

“Dang, if that ain’t irony, I don’t know what is.” She turned to see Pinkie Pie, still in costume, walking over to the candy apples and her eyes bulged. “Hey Fluttershy, I’m surprised to see you of all ponies here!”

“Thanks!” she said in her normal voice, causing Applejack to stagger back.

“Pinkie Pie?” She raised an eyebrow, frowning after recovering from her surprise. “Oh, sugarcube, I sure hope you’re tellin’ everypony it’s you in that costume. Otherwise, Fluttershy’s gonna have some strange conversations tomorrow mornin’.”

“Of course! I’m just doing this to surprise everypony; I wouldn’t want to give Fluttershy another reason to hate Nightmare Night!”

“By the way,” Rarity said, tapping Applejack on the shoulder, “have you seen Turing Test’s costume yet?”

“Oh. Is she here?” Applejack looked around and spotted Turing standing nearby. Her head was twitching as she glanced all around her, taking in the sights of the costumes and vendor stalls and decorations that surrounded her.

“Interesting.”

Applejack gawked.

“Turing!” Rarity hollered. “Come over here, darling, and show Applejack your costume!”

As she approached, Applejack leaned over to Twilight. “You mean to tell me that your robot dressed as a robot?”

“I know, I know…” Twilight groaned, putting her hoof to her head.

Turing halted in front of them. “Hello - meat - horse. I - mean - Applejack.”

She made a face. “Howdy.” She looked at her costume. “So… yer a robot, huh?”

“Correct. I - am - a - robot. I - am - here - to - take - Equestrian - jobs. Beep boop beep.”

Applejack stared at her, wide-eyed. Then she smiled, trying to hold back her snickering before finally losing her composure and broke into full-blown laughter.

“Applejack?” Twilight asked, raising her eyebrow. As AJ continued to laugh, Twilight frowned. “You don’t have to be mean.”

“Who’s bein’ mean? That’s actually pretty funny!” she managed to say through her laughter. “Color me impressed!”

“Impressed - is - not - a - color. Boop.”

Applejack stopped laughing, frowned, and waved her off. “Okay, ya had yer moment, now git before ya start annoyin’ me again.”

“Acknowledged. Now - proceeding - with - primary - objectives: 1. Acquire - candy; 2. Give - acquired - candy - to - Pinkie - Pie...” She walked away, leaving Applejack, Rarity, and Twilight alone. The latter two both looked to Applejack with smug grins.

“Yeah yeah, I know what yer both gonna say.” She sighed. “I already said I’d give her a chance, Twi. You just remember yer end o’ things.”

“Right,” Twilight sighed. Getting Fluttershy to see Turing won’t be easy, though. I’ll need to get everypony’s help to convince her…

Just then, Rainbow Dash landed nearby them. She was dressed as Daring Do with a pith helmet, jacket, and even a painted-on cutie mark to match her idol.

“Hey everypony! Some good pranking going on tonight! Kinda works up an appetite.” She eyed the caramel apples on Applejack’s table.

“Well, go right ahead,” Applejack said, taking one from the table and passing it to her. “This one’s just fer you, Rainbow Dash.”

“Sweet!” She took a bite and instantly made a face before spitting it out, sputtering and gagging. “What the… is this an onion?!”

Applejack grinned as Twilight and Rarity stifled their own laughter. “Told ya I’d getcha back fer last year.”

***

The night went on smoothly after that. Turing got a lot of comments on her costume from many of the townsponies and also was unsurprisingly good at the different carnival games. She proved a quick learner at the Spider-Toss and the Pumpkin Catapult, both of which won her a large amount of candy. It seemed even Pinkie had enough candy for herself, though, so Turing decided to share it with the local children.

“Thanks Miss Robot!” said Pipsqueak as she poured a portion of her candy into his bag. “You’re not so scary after all!”

“Child - lulled - into - false - sense - of - security - with - treats. Mission - successful,” Turing intoned. The other fillies and colts gathered around her giggled, though judging by the way their eyes darted to their classmates, it was obvious to Twilight that they hadn’t understood what she’d meant.

Button Mash rushed to the front of the line. He was wearing a blue suit with some sort of spiny mohawk protruding from the back of a modified hood. “You may be an evil minion of the evil Dr. Robotnag’s evil plans,” he shouted, pointing an accusing hoof at Turing, “but I, Pronto the Porcupine, will stop you in your evil tracks!”

Turing’s head cocked to the side as everypony stared. Then Button gave a subtle wink and she raised her head. “Your - attempts - to - stop - my - master - will - not - succeed. But - I - do - not - wish - to - be - destroyed. Perhaps - this - candy - will - distract - you? Beep?” She held out a bag of assorted chocolates.

“Wellll, I guess I can let you off with a warning this time,” he said coyly, a grin on his face as he took the candy while the other foals giggled at their little scene.

“I - am - glad. Firstvictimoftherobotapocalypsesayswhat.”

“What?” He blinked. “Awwww man!”

He and the other children talked excitedly as they wandered off. Twilight walked over and put her hoof on Turing’s shoulder.

“Turing, you’re doing really well tonight! The kids really seem to have taken a liking to you, everypony seems to think your costume is hilarious, and even Applejack let her guard down a little today!” She smiled broadly. “You even seem to be getting better at being funny, if you don’t mind my saying.”

Turing lifted the box on her head up. “Thank you, Twilight Sparkle,” she replied in her normal voice. “When I first learned of Nightmare Night, I made it a point to scan as much data and make as many inquiries about it as I could. I learned that costume choices seem to be either a form of wish fulfillment or a means of confronting fears. Why organic ponies enjoy scaring each other or being afraid themselves is not something I understand.”

“It’s… complicated,” Twilight replied, adjusting her hat. “It’s kind of fun when you’re not really in danger.”

“Understood.” She turned and watched as various foals met up with their parents or older siblings. “My research indicated that many ponies also enjoy the chance to emulate the actions or mannerisms of characters or archetypes. You, for instance, indicated that you are dressed as Marey Plodder. Rainbow Dash is dressed as Daring Do.

“In my case, I analyzed common fictional ideas about automata and cross-referenced them with the images I scanned from Button Mash’s comic book. By affecting the mannerisms and dialogue of a more stereotypical robot and wearing an ineptly-made costume, I thought to present myself as a mockery of the fears many ponies seem to have about me. It was my hope that satire would alleviate those fears.” She lowered the box back into place over her head. “Beep.”

Twilight stared at her, mouth open. She breathed in deeply, chest swelling, and smiled at her. “Turing… that’s actually very clever! I’m amazed you were able to do this all on your own!”

“Correction: I received some help from Pinkie Pie. She helped me to plan out some things to say that she believed would be more humorous. Though I am not certain why verbal insults and threatening job security in Equestria are funny, I have come to trust that she knows what she is doing.”

“Ah. That explains it.” Twilight resisted the urge to sigh. She had hoped this “character” was entirely Turing’s invention, but it was working out well regardless and it was still Turing’s idea, even if Pinkie helped make it funnier.

Just then, Pinkie, still in her Fluttershy costume, suddenly bounced over, waving her hooves to get Twilight’s attention. “Twilight, omigosh, here come Lyra and Bon Bon!” Pinkie pointed and Twilight followed until she spotted the pair.

The two of them were dressed alike. Both were wearing matching black suits and ties as well as sunglasses. They had mutual stony, deadpan expressions.

“Great costumes, you two!” Twilight exclaimed. “Are you two secret agents?”

“No,” Bon Bon said quickly.

“What?” Lyra cried, losing her deadpan in an instant. “But I thought we were supposed to be the Mares in Black!”

“No, I told you we’re the Blues Sisters!” Bon Bon snapped. She resumed her deadpan stare. "We've got 15 bits, half a cart full of hay, and we're wearing sunglases at night. Let's hit it."

“I thought you were those two gangsters from that Quarab Trotantino movie,” Rainbow Dash said as she landed among them.

Bon Bon rolled her eyes as Lyra giggled.

“Twilight Sparkle, are these two friends of yours?” Turing asked, interrupting the exchange.

“Oh, um… yes!” Twilight said, blushing slightly. “Turing Test, this is Lyra Heartstrings! We knew each other back in Canterlot.”

Lyra bowed.

“And, um…” Twilight looked to Bon Bon. She squinted her eyes and her smile became tight and strained.

“Bon Bon,” she sighed. “I’m a candy maker and I’m Lyra’s housemate.”

“Oh right, right!” Twilight exclaimed, chuckling nervously.

“It is nice to meet you, Lyra and Bon Bon.” Turing raised her mask to look at them more directly. “I am Turing Test. I am a robot, an artificial pony, and Twilight Sparkle is instructing me in making friends. I hope we will develop such a relationship.”

“I remember, I saw the newspaper!” Lyra exclaimed. “It’s nice to meet you!” She raised a hoof to her chin, still smiling. “So, um… what’s it like being a robot?”

Turing tilted her head. “I do not believe I can give a clear answer. I have always been a robot and have no comparison.” She put out her hoof, holding it upwards, letting her mask fall back into place. “If I were to ask you what it is like to be an organic pony, how would you answer?”

“It’s actually pretty great!” she said immediately. Then she paused. “Although, I mean, I have wondered about some things.” She leaned closer to her and Twilight. “Say, um… do you know if that one mare is coming back here soon?”

“Huh? Who do you mean?” Twilight asked, raising an eyebrow.

“You know. The one with the, um… mechanical hands.” Her eyes lit up and her smile grew wider. “I’d reeeeally like to ask her some questions!”

“Oh good, it seems everypony is here!” Rarity said, trotting over to them, derailing Lyra’s train of thought completely. “My my, Lyra and Bon Bon, you two look rather stylish in those suits!”

“Well, at least everypony likes them, even if we don’t know what we’re supposed to be,” Bon Bon sighed, rolling her eyes.

Then there came a sound that made them all raise their heads. It was the sound of the Ponyville Clocktower and the bells were ringing out, audible even over the energetic Nightmare Night festivities, music, and games. It tolled the time, the bells finally stopping after ten long, resounding chimes.

Both Rarity and Lyra raised their heads. “It’s time,” they said in unison.

The others looked at them, startled by their synchronous statement.

Bon Bon tensed up, sucking in a deep breath as she watched Lyra’s eyes gain a faraway look.

“We should go now, everypony,” Rarity said, the look in her eyes matching Lyra’s.

“Yes, we don’t want to be late,” Lyra added, strolling alongside her.

Twilight and the others just looked at each other and shrugged. Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie were already on the tips of their hooves at the thought of this mystery scavenger hunt.

“Lyra, you’re coming too?” Pinkie asked. “All right! It seems like we almost never get to hang out!” She turned to Bon Bon. “So I guess you’re coming too, right Bon Bon?”

“Um, I…”

“She’s not invited,” Rarity and Lyra said at once.

“Whoa whoa whoa…” Rainbow Dash said, holding up her hooves. “Just like that, Rarity? And you, Lyra? I thought you and Bon Bon were practically attached at the hip!”

“She’s not… invited…” Lyra said, though her eyes were becoming unfocused. “I… want to… but…” She held her head, wincing suddenly.

Twilight looked from her to Bon Bon, who was looking down at the ground. But as Lyra clutched at her head, she went over and put a hoof on her shoulder.

“No, Lyra, it’s fine.” She looked her in the eyes and gave her a small smile. “Seriously. It’s… it’s okay. Just have fun and, you know, be safe.”

Lyra looked at her blankly for a moment, then slowly smiled in return. “Right. Sure. Sorry you can’t come.”

“No worries.” She hugged her and then stepped away, slowly walking off as the rest of them formed a circle.

“So, where is this little scavenger hunt?” Twilight asked.

Lyra and Rarity donned matching mischievous grins.

***

“Whoa…” Rainbow Dash breathed. She stared up at their destination as they emerged from the Everfree Forest. “The Castle of the Two Sisters… whoever put this together, they’ve got great taste in Nightmare Night locations!”

The ruined castle, dark and foreboding as ever, looked even more intimidating and menacing as the moon was the only illumination in the dead of night. The sounds of the creatures in the Everfree sounded close and their screeches and howls only served to chill them further and spur them onward across the bridge and into the courtyard.

“Scanning…” Turing Test said suddenly, her voice startling them all. “Unidentified energy readings detected in this vicinity.”

“L-like what kind of energy?” Rarity asked.

“As stated, they are unidentified. They could be magical in nature, or the result of a slightly anomalous pocket of electromagnetic energy. More data is needed.” The group was silent as they edged closer to the rickety, rotten wooden doors. “I have also detected increased heart rates and heightened breathing from you all, indicating distress.”

“Th-that’s just excitement! I’m not scared!” Rainbow Dash declared, taking flight and zooming ahead of them. “In fact, I’m going in first! We’ll see who’s the bravest pony this Nightmare Night!”

The others, in spite of their fears, had to admit that they were pretty excited about this mystery scavenger hunt that somepony was throwing. They looked to each other, smiling eagerly, and rushed after her.

I know this castle, Twilight told herself. It’s nothing special, just a bunch of hallways, suits of armor, and some childish tricks that Celestia and Luna had installed. There’s nothing to be afraid of!

She of course was not aware of the two ponies standing at the window in the highest tower, watching them.

***

Bon Bon tread lightly behind the group of them. Occasionally one of them looked behind them as she followed and she thought she might have been discovered. But then they went on and she realized the device the Doctor had given her was still working.

An invisibility device, she marvelled to herself, grinning slightly as she crept toward the castle entrance. Maybe this way I can sneak in before either of those two know I’m here!

***

“It looks like the guests are here, Grace,” Glory whispered. “That little message you put into Rarity and the green one worked out perfectly.”

“Indeed. I am so glad the Children of Harmony came to our little gathering. And they brought the machine with them. Tonight we shall consecrate this holy place.”

“It’s a shame we didn’t get them all. Four out of six. I’m a little surprised the pink one didn’t come with them.”

“Ah, but it seems she did,” Grace said, her eyes still closed. “I can see beyond that veneer. She’s disguised herself as one of the others. How droll!” She chortled and then froze. Her features went from a calm smile to a toothy grin. “Glory.”

“Hm? What is it?” he asked, looking down at her.

“It seems we have an uninvited guest.”

Glory peered out the window again, but saw no one. “What? I don’t see anypony.”

“Oh, she’s using some clever gadget to conceal herself. But she cannot hide from my blessed sight.” She motioned for Glory to lean down so she could whisper to him more clearly. “She’s here, Glory. Our old friend Special Agent Sweetie Drops has arrived.”

To be continued...

Author's Notes:

Insert Vincent Price laugh here.

Okay, first order of business is to thank my artist, Colby Green, and my editor, GaPJaxie for their monumental help on this chapter. The picture of the gang in costume is something I asked Green to come up with quickly and he delivered in full force. Jaxie helped trim this chapter down a lot. It needed some pretty heavy rewrites and some scene cuts, some of which I might use later, but you may get a deleted scene if not!

Meanwhile, it's time to play "Spot the Reference" again, kiddies!

-The title of course references a certain landmark chess-playing computer.

-The RMCA is a nod to the SCP universe.

-A bunch of "Doctor Who" references, of course:

+Derpy's costume is a reference to the Weeping Angels, the ultra-creepy monsters from "Blink."

+Doc dressing like a pear is another reference to the Tenth Doctor's apparent dislike of them.

+A very slight reference, but Doc working unofficially for the RMCA is a reference to the Doctor's off-again-on-again relationship with UNIT.

-Costumes:

+Twilight's Marey Plodder is of course a reference to "Fifty Shades of Gray." Wait, that wasn't it...

+Pinkie Pie disguising herself as Fluttershy references "The Crystal Empire," but I figured she did that for information purposes; she's doing it now for fun.

+Turing's costume is a reference to the Tin Soldier costume pack for "Team Fortress 2." Her line about being a robot in disguise? Hm, can't remember. Some other franchise Hasbro did.

+The jokes about Lyra and Bon Bon's costumes reference, of course, "Men in Black," the "Blues Brothers" (Jaxie suggested Bon Bon's extra quip), and "Pulp Fiction" from Quentin Tarantino, all of which involve dudes wearing nice black suits.

One last reference is Grace and Glory's names. They're named after the creepy final boss tune from the "Jet Set Radio" games:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YPL8zFxi9xY

See you next chapter!

Deep Blue, Part 2

View Online

Pushing past the heavy ancient door, Twilight and the others entered the castle and stepped into the Great Hall. The dim light of the moon filtered in through the cracked stainedglass windows just enough to illuminate the area. Bits of rubble littered the floor and vines grew up through cracks in the floor. A forest of cobwebs hung from the ceiling high above them and they shifted slightly at the change in pressure as the ancient door was opened. A cold autumn draft blew through the nearby halls, carrying the scent of mildew.

“My…” Rarity whispered, glancing all around her. “I’d forgotten the awful state of this castle.” She shivered.

“Not chickening out already, are you?” Rainbow Dash asked as she hovered over her, forelegs crossed, staring down at her with a grin.

“C-certainly not!” Rarity shot back, holding her head up. She took the lead as the others followed.

As they proceeded, the dark path was slightly illuminated by a violet glow which cast their shadows ahead of them. They turned and parted, seeing that it was just the light emanating from Turing’s glowing eyes.

“I had withheld my inquiries until now, Twilight Sparkle,” Turing said as she trotted alongside Twilight, “but it may now be appropriate to point out that no one has explained what a ‘scavenger hunt’ is to me.”

“Oh, right!” Twilight adjusted her wizard’s cap, glancing at the darkened stone alcoves to her left and right. “Well, it’s usually a game where everypony has to get a bunch of items or take pictures next to a landmark or something. And whoever finishes their list first wins!” She glanced around again, smirking as she did so. “In this case, we’ll probably need to search all over the castle, so teams will have to do this without getting too freaked out. But that’s part of the fun!”

“Understood.”

“Ooh, I can’t wait!” Pinkie Pie exclaimed, leaping into the air, the fake wings of her Fluttershy costume flopping at her sides.

“I just bet whoever set this up is planning to jump out and scare us,” Rainbow Dash said. She eyed Rarity with a raised eyebrow. “Whoever invited us better be good… I don’t scare easily!”

Turing turned toward Rainbow Dash. “Please clarify. This sort of activity involves somepony hiding until they are able to surprise us at an unexpected moment?”

Rainbow Dash shrugged. “Usually.”

Turing tapped her chin. “And that is a source of amusement?”

“Now you’re getting it!” Lyra said. She shivered, but smiled to herself anyway. “I’m usually pretty terrible with this kind of scary stuff. I get a nightmare and can’t get to sleep for hours, but then Bon Bon just makes me some cocoa and she talks to me until…”

She frowned, her ears drooping.

Twilight went over to her to put her hoof on her shoulder. “Lyra? Is everything okay?”

“Y-yes,” she said slowly. She patted Twilight’s hoof, managing to smile. “I’m all right.”

Twilight returned her smile. “Okay. If you say so.”

“Look everypony!” Rarity cried, startling them all. “There’s an envelope on the stairs!”

They rushed forward toward the stairs at the end of the Great Hall when suddenly, slowly, the envelope floated upwards and began to dance in the air.

“Ooooh!” a voice warbled from the envelope. It wobbled in the air to the left and right as the voice continued, saying, “I am the Pony of Shaaaadoowwwsss. Leave my castle at once or--”

Rainbow Dash burst out laughing, collapsing to the ground as she shook her head. “Seriously? This is somepony’s idea of scary? Whoever’s doing that voice doesn’t even sound like they’re trying. Somepony’s probably just levitating it with magic.” She turned to Rarity and Lyra, smirking at them. “Was this your idea?”

“Uh, Rainbow Dash,” Twilight whispered, elbowing her. “I don’t see any magical aura around it. And I don’t see any wires either.” She frowned, but she looked more curious than actually afraid as she rubbed her chin.

The envelope shook even harder as the voice continued. “N-never mind that! I told you to leave, now go!”

Pinkie, still in her Fluttershy costume, joined Rainbow Dash’s laughter. “Ha! Uh oh, Rainbow Dash, looks like you made the ghost angry!” She bounded over to the envelope. “Hi, ghost! Hey, since you’re dead, do you want to hear Rinny’s joke about Starswirl the Bearded?”

“In actuality, it is not a ghost. It is Bon Bon.”

They all froze, including the envelope. The others turned to stare at her.

“Thermal scans revealed her following us since we left Ponyville.” She paused a moment, her eyes contracting slightly. “Was her concealment part of the attempt to frighten us in a way that would cause amusement? I apologize for revealing her deception.” She lowered her head. “Sad beep.”

There was a sigh and the envelope fluttered to the floor and Bon Bon faded back into view, her hoof touching a circular device hung around her chest.

“Great.” She blushed as she gave them all a weak grin. “Um, hi everypony.”

“Bon Bon, it really is you! You made it!” Lyra cheered, rushing over to her and throwing her forelegs around Bon Bon’s neck. Then she blinked and let her go, backing away slowly. “Wait, you weren’t invited. But… now I can’t remember why…”

Bon Bon shook her head and led her back to the group. “Never mind that now. Look, we don’t have time to mess around.” Her eyes narrowed and she leaned in toward all of them. “Seriously, you all need to leave this castle right now.”

Rainbow Dash frowned. “But we didn’t even start the scavenger hunt!” She knocked on her pith helmet. “I was all set for this little adventure, even if your stunt was lame.”

“Oh, so this whole thing was your idea, Bon Bon?” Twilight asked. “Listen, just because this part didn’t work out--”

“It wasn’t my idea!” She stomped both forehooves on the ground, growling through her teeth. “Look, please…” She glanced at Lyra and her anger shifted into fear as she bit her lip. “There is no scavenger hunt. It’s all a ruse to lure you into a trap. Please, for your own safety, just leave!”

Turing Test raised her head, ears twitching inside the cardboard box on her head. “Somepony is approaching.”

They followed her gaze and heard soft hoofsteps. Bon Bon placed herself in front of the others as a figure slowly came down the darkened staircase. Her eyes widened and her blood turned to ice when she saw who it was.

“Dear little Sweetie Drops, must you go and ruin everypony’s fun?” Grace stepped into the moonbeam that radiated through a hole in the roof, the glint of the metal plate on her habit reflecting faintly on the stone wall as she descended. She wore a serene smile and her eyes were closed, though she hit each step on the stairs perfectly. She reached the landing halfway down the stairs and sat down, her hooves raised as she smiled beatifically. “Welcome, Children of Harmony. I am Sister Grace, a humble servant of a higher power.”

Bon Bon tensed up. “Everypony do as I say.” Her voice was quiet and even. “Start moving toward the exit.”

Rainbow Dash raised an eyebrow at the stranger. “What for? Some pony with a scarf on her head is supposed to scare us?” She turned to the others, expecting similar expressions of doubt, but then she saw Rarity and Lyra.

Rarity’s eyes were constricted and she and Lyra were both backing away. “Rainbow Dash… I think I remember her,” Rarity whispered. She was shivering, lip quivering “Sh-she came to the Boutique. Lyra and I were there--”

“There were two of them!” Lyra cried suddenly, her eyes bulging. She then huddled behind Bon Bon, shutting her eyes tightly. “I remember now. Th-they did something to us. It’s all a haze, but I remember... I was fighting, but there was nothing I could do! She was in my head. She was saying something and I couldn’t shut it out!”

Bon Bon grit her teeth. “It’s okay, Lyra,” she said, placing her hoof over her friend’s. “Everypony just get out of here and leave her to me. And whatever you do, don’t look directly at her!”

Grace chortled at that, covering her mouth demurely. “Now now, there is no need to fear, if you cooperate. I will be direct.” She turned toward Turing, eyes still shut, and pointed a hoof at her. “We are here for the Machine.”

They all looked to Turing Test, who’d locked her gaze on Grace.

“Our little pawns, Miss Rarity and Miss Lyra were made to participate in a scenario that would bring it here.”

They all stiffened at that, stepping forward in front of Rarity and Lyra defensively.

“The rest of you were to be a bonus,” Grace continued. “We’d hoped to gather you here so that you might all face judgment for your sins. However, if we must conclude our business early, then you may simply turn the machine over to us and we will leave you unharmed.” She chuckled again, adding, “And by the way, those are quite charming little costumes you’re all wearing.”

“You’d see ‘em better with your eyes open, lady!” Rainbow Dash yelled, shaking a hoof at her. “And if you think we’re giving Tee to you, then you’ve got another thing coming!” She shot forward, tackling Grace and pinning her down at the landing.

“Rainbow Dash, don’t!” Bon Bon screamed, reaching for her.

As Rainbow held down Grace, the smiling nun opened her eyes, bathing Rainbow Dash in a deep blue glow.

“What are you… you…” She released her grip and sank to her haunches as Grace gently pushed her backwards, standing up.

“Oh yes, you’re right,” Grace whispered, her smile drawing up into a tight grin. “I can see you much better now.”

Rainbow Dash’s jaw slackened and her eyes became unfocused as she stared into that glow. Her rage had subsided along with her thoughts, imagination, and memory. There was nothing but the light. And within that light, there was absolutely nothing.

Grace shut her eyes again. “Pride goeth before a fall, dear child.” She gently pushed Rainbow Dash backwards, causing her to tumble down the steps as limply as a ragdoll, landing roughly before her friends who all cried out and ran to her side.

“Dashie!” Pinkie screamed, taking her face in her hooves. “Dashie, are you all right?!”

Twilight waved a hoof in front of Rainbow’s eyes. “Rainbow! Rainbow Dash!” Her gaze was blank and unresponsive.

“Scanning vital signs,” Turing said, stepping forward, removing the box from her head to see better. “Analysis: breathing and heart rate are normal. No fractures detected. Physically, she is unharmed.”

“She’s catatonic.” They all turned to Bon Bon when she spoke. She was shaking, her eyes aflame and her teeth clenched. She stomped her hooves, a roar erupting from her throat as she looked up at Grace who smiled impassively down at them. “Grace, you monster!”

Grace laughed dryly, putting a hoof to her chest. “Please. Ponies are the real monsters, Sweetie Drops. But enough pontification.” She cleared her throat. “Now don’t bother trying to escape. My dear companion Glory has already cut off your exit.” She raised her head. “Isn’t that right, Glory?”

They all whirled around to see the massive stallion standing in the doorway, blocking the exit. “Indeed, Grace,” he replied, his deep voice echoing throughout the Great Hall. He slowly began to approach them, a slight amused grin on his face. “I’ve destroyed the bridge leading here. Your exit is gone, Children of Harmony. Your only hope now is to cooperate.”

Rarity and Lyra had both started panicking, looking for a way out and seeing none. Pinkie was still trying desperately to awaken Rainbow Dash, calling her name again and again. Twilight, Turing Test, and Bon Bon huddled together as the pair began to advance on them.

“I… I don’t care who you are,” Twilight shouted, looking back and forth between Grace and Glory, “but I’m not giving Turing Test over to you!”

“Twilight Sparkle, perhaps we should consider--”

“No, Turing!” Twilight said, turning to her, eyes narrowed as her horn began to glow. “You are not going with these two! We’re getting out of here!”

She levitated a huge chunk of stone from the collapsed ceiling and flung it at Glory. She’d expected him to dodge it, but instead the chunk struck him directly, shattering into tiny pieces. There was a burst of dust and gravel, but then he stepped right through it, flashing a gleaming white smile, gently brushing the dust from his shoulder. There wasn’t a bruise on him.

“A mere half ton of stone? You may as well be hurling spitwads.” He lowered his head, brown eyes narrowing. “But you’ll still pay for that just the same, Princess.”

Twilight’s jaw dropped and she sank to the ground. “Impossible. H-how…?”

Grace sighed. “Oh, you poor, lost Children of Harmony. I was looking forward to the thrill of taking each of you apart one by one, much like your multicolored friend there, but it seems we’ll have to make this quick.” She drew her lips down into an exaggerated frown. “For your sins, I’m afraid you must pay a heavy penance.” She slowly began to open her eyes, a sliver of blue light shining outward.

Bon Bon reached into her suit and removed a small green sphere, throwing it at the ground between the group and Grace, causing it to explode in a huge cloud of smoke, obscuring Grace from view and causing her to stagger back, coughing.

“Twilight, listen, we need out of here now!” Bon Bon hissed. “Can you teleport us back across the chasm to the Everfree Forest?”

Twilight blinked and then her eyes lit up as she nodded. “Everypony, near me!”

Turing dashed forward, snatching up Rainbow Dash as Pinkie and the others joined Twilight in a cluster.

“Glory!” Grace shouted, coughing through the smoke as she ran through it.

Glory roared and rushed at them like a freight train as Twilight’s magic energized. However, she wasn’t prepared for his burst of speed. Turing was there in an instant to block him, but his momentum was enough to allow him to plow into the group of them just as Grace reached them, knocking Twilight off her hooves and interrupting her spell. There was a bright flash of light and the whole group of them vanished, leaving the Great Hall empty and silent.

***

Glory shook his head. He was in a stone hallway. He stood and grunted as his mane became entangled with cobwebs. He glanced around, blinking in the dim light until he spotted something on the ground. He came closer and saw it was Rainbow Dash. She was lying on the floor, flat on her back, her breathing very slow, her eyes half-opened and glazed over.

He grunted. “Filthy defiling maggot.” He placed his hoof on Dash’s chest and slowly began to press down. She barely made a sound as the breath was crushed from her lungs.

“Glory!”

He whirled around, taking his hoof off Rainbow Dash, and saw Grace galloping towards him.

“Grace, there you are!” His ears perked up and he knelt down, touching his nose to hers. “I’m relieved to see you’re unharmed.” He jerked his head at Rainbow Dash. “I was just about to send this sinner to her final judgment.”

Grace held up a hoof. “Now now,” she said gently. “There is no need to harm her. It isn’t as though the poor wretch could feel it now anyway.” She turned her head up toward him. “We should gather her up. Even if she is little more than an empty vessel now, she may yet make a good hostage.”

Glory nodded and gathered Rainbow Dash up, draping her across his back. “Looks like Princess Twilight’s spell misfired. We’ve been scattered across the castle.”

“Indeed.” Grace searched the walls. “Now, if I’m not mistaken… ah!” She pressed a brick on the wall and there was a pop and the sound of gears turning as the wall pulled back and slid away, revealing a hidden passage. “Mind your head, Glory,” she said as she led him into the corridor. “We must hurry and find the others.”

Glory chuckled. “It seems we’ll get to enjoy a scavenger hunt for Nightmare Night after all.”

Grace turned to him, the glint of her teeth barely visible in the near-total darkness. “Then let’s play for keeps.”

***

Pinkie and Lyra were halfway down the Hall of Hooves, the narrow hallway lined with disembodied forelegs.

“Did you hear something, Lyra?” Pinkie asked, her ears twitching as she turned her head. When she didn’t respond, she turned to see Lyra staring at one of the hooves. “Uh, Lyra?”

“Why hooves?” she muttered to herself, rubbing her chin as she narrowed her eyes. “Now a Hall of Hands, that would be impressive!” She brightened at the thought. “I wonder if I could convince Bon Bon to let me work on a new arts and crafts project…” Then she blinked and lowered her ears, heaving a sigh. “Bon Bon.”

Pinkie went over to her, placing a hoof on her shoulder. “Don’t worry, Ly-Ly. We’ll find her and the others in no time!” She gave her a kind smile. “When you see Bon Bon, I’m sure she’ll want to see you smiling, not looking all downy frowny!”

“Yeah.” Lyra managed a smile and nodded to her. “You’re right, Pinkie. And I bet Twilight or somepony else can help Rainbow Dash. You and the others are the Elements of Harmony, after all! I’m sure you’ll beat those two!”

“Right!” Pinkie exclaimed, her voice echoing loudly through the hallways. She covered her mouth. “Uh, but maybe we should be quieter in case those meanies are out there looking for us.”

Lyra swallowed, glancing around. “Good idea,” she whispered.

Pinkie’s ears twitched. “Hm. It’s a little hard to hear in this Fluttershy costume.” She reached to the back of her head and pulled a hidden zipper, letting Fluttershy’s head split down the middle as her own head emerged. “Ah, much better!”

Lyra stuck out her tongue, turning away. “Ew. Just when I thought tonight couldn’t get any creepier.”

Pinkie bounced by her. “Okay, Ly-Ly! We’ve got to find the others, and I bet we can find a secret passage that will lead us right to them!” She began examining each of the hooves lining the walls. “Hmm,” she said, jutting her lower lip out as she stroked an imaginary beard. “Now, which of these was it?”

Lyra, a few meters behind her, raised an eyebrow. “Heh. Hey, maybe these hooves would be more helpful if we were friendly.” Chuckling to herself, she touched one of the hooves, attempting to shake it in greeting. “Nice to meet you, Hoof! I’m--” the hoof twitched and a trap door slid open under her, dropping her out of sight swiftly before closing again.

“Sorry, Lyra, could you say that again?” Pinkie waited for a response. When she didn’t get one, she turned her head and saw the hall was completely empty. She furrowed her brow and began to look all around her. “Um… L-Lyra?” And then she heard hoofsteps coming up the hallway. She froze, backing away, her blue eyes widening.

Two ponies were approaching.

***

Twilight threw her wizard’s hat on the ground, stomping on it. “I can’t believe I messed up the spell!” she shouted. She tossed away her cape and glasses as well, no longer in the mood for any Nightmare Night foolishness.

“It was not your fault, Twilight Sparkle.” Turing Test walked over to her, the rest of her costume also shed.

“She’s right, Twilight.” Bon Bon was checking the pockets inside her black suit, electing to keep wearing it and making sure her supplies were in place. “You still got us away from Glory. Another second and he probably would have stopped your spell completely.”

Twilight sighed. “You’re right. Let’s just focus on finding everypony else.”

“Twilight Sparkle, an optimal solution would be to teleport our friends from the castle.”

Twilight tapped her chin. “That would be possible, but we need to find them first. And I just teleported nine ponies at once, so I’ll need a little while to let my magic recover fully. Teleporting a large group is much more draining than just teleporting myself. Now let’s see where we are.”

She glanced around the area, taking in the sight of it. The room was a cavernous dining hall. Once upon a time, there had been a beautiful wooden table there and a proud chandelier. The table had long since rotted away and the chandelier was dingy and lopsided, barely hanging on to the ceiling. Though they were faded and the paint cracked, several portraits still hung on the wall.

“That’s Lord Canterbury!” Twilight said, rushing over to the painting. “I remember now! This must be in the west wing. I think I can navigate my way around from here.”

Turing’s ears moved up and down. She then placed a hoof to the stone wall. “One moment… auditory and vibration sensors do not indicate any movement in this vicinity within 75 meters. This area of the castle is clear.”

“Okay. Turing, your eyes and ears are best, so you take the lead. Let’s find the others!”

They broke into a gallop, moving through a stone archway and through a long, curving hallway.

“While we’re looking,” Twilight said, glancing over at Bon Bon, “maybe you’d like to tell us just what the hay is going on here? Just who were those two ponies?!”

Bon Bon narrowed her eyes. “Nopony knows everything about them, but we do know their real names. The stallion is Glory Be and the mare is Amazing Grace. Glory Be was a former candidate for the Royal Guard. He was a cadet with outstanding strength and skill, but he couldn’t control his strength or his temper. Too many injuries to the others in sparring training, and too much back talk to his superiors. When he was finally drummed out, he beat his drill instructor insensible before fleeing. And that’s when he got picked up by the Umbral Order.”

“Wait… Umbral Order? Why does that sound familiar?”

“They were a cult, a religious order that believed that the time of ponies was ending and that a race of living shadows called the umbrum--”

“Wait, of course!” Twilight gasped. “Not long ago, Princess Cadance and I found King Sombra’s old personal study in the Crystal Empire. We found his journal. It said he was really an umbrum who wanted to awaken an army of umbrum sleeping under the Crystal Empire!”

“Exactly. That’s what the Umbral Order wanted too: they believed the Crystal Empire would soon return and that King Sombra would reappear to fulfill that destiny.” She grinned at Twilight. “Guess they were half right, thanks to you and your friends.”

Twilight smiled back, but her smile faded as a thought occurred to her. “Wait, is that why they targeted us? Because we defeated Sombra?”

“Knowing those two psychopaths, I’d say so.” Bon Bon made a face. “The Order had a secret compound on the outskirts of Equestria where they preached to their members that ponykind was inherently wicked and that the umbrum would cleanse the world. And central to it was a convent of nuns that controlled every aspect of daily life there. Sister Amazing Grace was one of them. She always wears her habit with an image of King Sombra on the forehead.”

They reached the end of the corridor and found that the secret door that led to the exit had been smashed clean through, the hard stone shattered into rubble. They slowed and stepped out, finding themselves in the ruins of the throne room. There was nopony around and the area was silent save for the sound of wind blowing through the abandoned castle.

“Heat traces located,” Turing said. In her vision, she spotted several glowing hoofprints that were invisible to Twilight and Bon Bon. She began to follow them. “Thermal scans indicate that several individuals travelled through this area. Matching size to visual memory… Grace, Glory, and Rarity are the most probable individuals. We must hurry.”

Turing Test took the lead as Twilight and Bon Bon fell in step behind her.

“So, what happened to Rainbow Dash?” Twilight whispered. “How did Grace make her like… that?”

Bon Bon swallowed. “The Order was experimenting with forbidden alchemy and dark magic to try to create all kinds of living weapons, monsters really, to attack and undermine Equestria’s defenses before Sombra’s return. Glory Be and Amazing Grace both volunteered for their experiments and apparently were the only ones who made it through the process”

Twilight gawked. “You mean…”

Bon Bon nodded. “Exactly.” She curled her lip at the thought. “Still, they both gained incredible abilities. Glory has unbelievable strength and endurance. He’s practically invincible. When the compound was raided, he put thirty ponies in the hospital when he escaped. Spears, magic, brute force… nothing could even slow him down. But Grace…” She shivered. “She’s so much worse.

“Grace gained psychic abilities. Her eyes generate psycho-reactive energy. Whenever she opens her eyes, a blue light shines out of them. If anypony makes direct eye contact with her, she can scramble their minds, make them hallucinate, disable their senses, or… or just render them catatonic. She can even drive you insane just by staring at you.”

Twilight slowed her pace, her eyes going wide. “That’s horrible… and now she’s done that to Rainbow Dash.”

“And she implanted the idea for this scavenger hunt in Rarity’s head. And Lyra’s too.” She hung her head. “That’s how I knew it was her. I recognized the symptoms in Lyra.”

Turing Test quickened her pace. “The trail is becoming stronger. I believe we are coming close.”

“Good job, Turing,” Twilight said. Then she frowned and glanced sideways at Bon Bon. “How do you know all this, Bon Bon? Please tell me the truth.”

Bon Bon bowed her head. “The truth is--”

There was an ear-splitting scream just ahead of them, further up the hallway.

“Rarity!” Twilight cried as Turing broke into a run.

“Hold on, let me go invisible and we might get the drop on them!” She put a hoof on Twilight’s shoulder as Turing ran ahead. “Just remember, no matter what, don’t look at her directly! If you make eye contact with her, it’s all over!”

Twilight nodded and dashed forward as Bon Bon turned on the Doctor’s device, vanishing from sight.

“No! No, please!”

They entered the room, a massive empty wine cellar lined with rotting wine casks, and saw that Grace and Glory had already cornered Rarity. Glory was holding her easily in one foreleg as Grace approached her. Rarity’s eyes were shut tight as she struggled, refusing to face her. She was shaking in fear, tears streaming down her cheeks.

“Rarity!” Twilight shouted.

Rarity turned at the sound of Twilight’s voice, her eyes popping open. “Twilight?! Run! Run before--”

Grace seized her face and turned her towards her own, opening her eyes, bathing Rarity in blue light. Her struggles stopped instantly.

“Rarity, no!” Twilight screamed. “Turing, stop them!”

Turing sprinted forward, but Glory spotted her and seized Rarity’s neck in a vice-like grip.

“Stop right there!” Glory bellowed, holding Rarity up, her body limp as a ragdoll. Rarity’s expression was blank, her eyes drooping half-shut and her mouth slightly open. “One more step and I’ll break her in two.” He stepped aside and revealed that Rainbow Dash was laid against the wall. “Both of them.”

Turing stopped immediately, her hooves skidding on the stone floor.

“There’s a good automaton,” Glory said with a chuckle.

“I prefer the term robot.”

Grace stepped forward, her eyes now closed. “Oh my, it seems somepony built her with a bit of an attitude! But still, I am glad you’ve come, Machine.” She sat down, bowing to her. “And it seems Princess Twilight is here.” She paused, turning toward an empty pocket of air. “And also our dear old friend Sweetie Drops.”

Bon Bon stopped in her tracks, still invisible. How? How did she--

“Now now, if you do not stop trying to sneak up on me, Glory will make good on his threats. You don’t wish him to harm the poor child, do you?”

Bon Bon reappeared, turning away from Grace as she backed away, motioning for Twilight to do the same.

Grace crossed her hooves in front of her chest. “Your little device cannot deceive me. By the blessed will of the umbrum, one of the side effects of my wonderful gift was that I can now sense the world around me without my eyes. I must keep my eyes closed to keep my dearest companion safe, but clearly they did not wish for me to be blind and further burden him.” She gestured to Glory, who bowed to her.

“You’re no burden at all, Grace.” Then he turned his attention to Turing Test. “Now, Machine, you just stay right there.”

“You have attacked my friends and are holding two of them hostage.” Turing Test held out a hoof. “What is your objective in this matter? Perhaps we can reach an agreement.”

“Such a polite thing! But still,” Grace shuddered, “to think that the sinful ponies of this world would create a graven image like you, an idol to their own arrogance!”

“Indeed,” Glory said, curling his lip, “she really is an abomination unlike any I’ve seen.”

“Your attempts to insult me will not be effective. I only wish to assist in the recovery of Rainbow Dash and Rarity.”

“Such concern!” Grace intoned. “Well, to be perfectly blunt, Machine, we have been offered a very generous donation to our cause to acquire you. And now that you’re here,” she opened her eyes, staring directly at Turing, “you will come with us!”

Twilight and Bon Bon shielded their eyes completely. “Turing Test, don’t look at her!”

“It is all right, Twilight Sparkle,” Turing replied, staring right back at Grace. “My analysis of the magical energy she produced while attacking Rarity indicated that it would be largely ineffective on my artificial brain. She is unable to control me.”

Grace shut her eyes, her face bunching up into a deep frown. “I see,” she said, her voice taking on a growl. “I cannot penetrate the soul of something that has no soul.”

“What is a soul?”

Grace burst out laughing, her high voice echoing throughout the stone room. “Truly the words of an ignorant child!” She held up a hoof as she got herself under control. “Very well then. We will do this the old fashioned way: you will shut down and give yourself over to us, or else your pony companions will suffer the consequences. Though I suppose, as a mere machine, you do not care about them--”

“Incorrect. I do care about them.” She turned to look at Rarity and Rainbow Dash. “I do not understand why you wished to harm them. However, I will comply--”

“Turing, don’t!” Twilight shouted. “You can’t go with them!”

Turing looked over her shoulder. “Twilight Sparkle, it is not logical to place the safety of a robot over that of your friends.”

“She’s right, Princess Twilight.” Bon Bon tightened her lips before adding, “Listen, she’s just a machine. Even if she is nice, we can’t trade our friends’ lives for--”

“Quiet, both of you!” Twilight shouted, stomping her hoof. “Turing Test, you’re my friend too and it isn’t right to ask you to give yourself up to save another of our friends! No matter what, I order you not to surrender to them!”

Turing was quiet. She slowly turned back to Grace. “Twilight Sparkle is my end user. I cannot controvert her order.”

Glory sneered at that. “Then she’ll just have to change her mind.” He hefted Rarity up. She made only the slightest sound as he tightened his grip around her.

“No, wait!” Bon Bon shouted, reaching out with one hoof, still keeping her eyes turned away from Grace. “Just… let me talk some sense into Princess Twilight for a moment!”

“As you wish,” Grace said, motioning to Glory. He relaxed his grip, though Rarity was still dangling limply, her eyes still vacant and bleary.

“Okay.” Bon Bon swallowed. “Turing Test, just stay there and keep an eye on them.”

“Understood.”

Bon Bon came close to Twilight, practically nose to nose. “Princess, is your magic back? Could you teleport a group of us to someplace safe?” she whispered.

Twilight closed her eyes, concentrating. “Yes, I think so. But I can’t teleport Rarity or Rainbow Dash unless they’re close enough to me!”

“That’s fine.” Bon Bon shifted her eyes over to Turing momentarily. “And Turing, if your ears are sensitive enough to pick up what we’re saying, give us a sign without tipping off Grace and Glory.”

Turing didn’t move from her spot, but her ears slowly twitched up and down, squeaking rhythmically as they did so.

“Guess she can.” Bon Bon smiled. “Twilight, get ready to teleport. Turing, get ready to grab Rainbow and Rarity.”

She continued to whisper as Grace and Glory waited. Grace furrowed her brow and Glory yawned, blinking away tears of boredom as he did.

Bon Bon suddenly reached into her suit and whirled around flinging a hoof-full of brightly-colored round pellets at Glory’s face. They erupted on impact with a series of loud cracks and bright flashes. Though he wasn’t in pain, he still flinched and reeled back, dropping Rarity in surprise.

“Engaging U-Mode.” Turing Test’s horn emerged and she enveloped Rainbow and Rarity in her magic, yanking them away from Glory and pulling them back, right past Grace, before dashing back to Twilight and Bon Bon.

“Glory!” Grace shrieked, jutting her hoof at them.

The gigantic stallion was on all fours in an instant, and dashed toward the group almost as fast as Turing had, intent on stopping their teleportation.

Seeing him, Bon Bon levelled her hind legs at a nearby wine cask and kicked with all her might, causing the rotting wood to crack and the dark red contents to come gushing out, blocking Glory’s path as he reared back.

Behind the wave of liquid, there was a bright flash and the group blinked out of sight.

Glory growled in rage and stomped at the ground, cracking the hard stone floor like it was made of glass.

Grace let out a long sigh. “There is no time for regret, Glory. The Children of Harmony have not escaped us yet. Let us hurry and procure another hostage before they escape.” Her expression darkened. “And next time we see Agent Sweetie Drops, we will be sure she doesn’t have another chance to use one of her toys.”

***

Bon Bon opened her eyes. The room they were in was a cavernous library. A dusty and worn table stood in the center. Twilight trotted over to a chair and tipped it backwards. There was a hiss and creak of ancient gears and the nearby bookshelf pulled backward and then separated, revealing a door.

“Come on, this way!” Twilight said. Turing Test, still carrying Rarity, followed her with Bon Bon coming right after. Twilight flicked a switch on the wall, causing the shelf to slide back into place. Lighting her horn, Twilight led them into the hidden room.

“Whoa.” Bon Bon looked around the room breathlessly. The circular room had more bookcases and two arching stainedglass windows, the glass still intact, which displayed a stylized image of the sun and moon, respectively. The paint and drapery were still intact as well. There was a couch near the wall and Turing laid Rarity and Rainbow Dash on it gently.

“They seem to be in good condition, Twilight Sparkle,” Turing said.

“You call this a good condition?!” Twilight shouted.

“My apologies. I only meant that their vital signs are strong despite their unresponsive state.”

“They’re catatonic, Turing! They’re…” She looked to the pair of them and her eyes began to fill with tears. “Rarity… Rainbow…”

“Princess Twilight,” Bon Bon said, going to her, “I’m so sorry about all this. I just--”

Twilight whirled on her, eyes narrow and teeth clenched. “All right Bon Bon, or Sweetie Drops, or whatever your name is! I want the whole truth this time!”

Bon Bon gulped. “All right.” She took a deep breath, letting it out slowly. “Three years ago, before you ever came to Ponyville, I was a member of the RMCA - the Royal Monstrosity Containment Agency - operating as a Special Agent codenamed Sweetie Drops. I know it sounds crazy, but it’s true. Celestia could tell you all about it; she commissioned the group herself a hundred years ago. We were a group of monster hunters tracking down abominations and artificial chimeras that threatened the peace of the nation. The Umbral Order’s experiments, including Grace and Glory, qualified.”

She hesitated a moment before drawing herself up. “I was part of the task force that infiltrated the Order. For a short while, I was posing as one of Grace’s nuns. They took me because of my skill with alchemy. My special talent is candy making, but I’m an alchemist by trade. That’s how I was able to make these things.” She opened her suit jacket, displaying that her pockets were lined with various things that looked like candy but Twilight suspected were far more potent. “Once we had our evidence, we raided the Order’s compound. That’s how Grace knows me.”

Twilight was practically shaking. “If you knew all about them, why didn’t you prevent all this from happening?!”

Bon Bon hung her head. “I tried. I tried, but…” She swallowed, shuddering. “I didn’t know where they were. I couldn’t break through to Lyra and get her to tell me where this scavenger hunt was. She just kept saying it was a secret. If I’d pushed her or prevented her from fulfilling her programming, she might have suffered an aneurism! Even if not, I had to find Grace and Glory and the only way to do that was to follow her, and by extension, all of you.”

She shut her eyes tightly. “Princess Twilight, you don’t know the extent of how awful these two can be. Grace and Glory are the last two members of the Order and they care absolutely nothing for the ponies of Equestria. They left a trail of broken bodies and minds as they escaped. Now that they’ve resurfaced, I can’t just let them slip away. Plus,” she added, a crack in her voice, “they might have decided to cover their tracks by silencing Rarity and Lyra. Permanently.”

“Then you could have at least called the Royal Guard--”

“They aren’t equipped to deal with this!” Bon Bon snapped. “If they came here, it would be just like the raid on the Order! It would mean more ponies would suffer because of the RMCA’s failure to stop these two when we had a chance! My failure!” She shuddered. “I couldn’t let that happen. You saw what happened! If even more ponies suffered…” She took a deep breath. “So I let you and your friends spring the trap, but after that, I tried to scare you and get you to leave. I wanted to take them down by myself. I didn’t know Grace could see through my invisibility device.”

Her lip quivered and she took a long, shaky breath. “This is my fault. I’m so sorry. I’ve lost so many other friends and colleagues to these two. I just didn’t want anypony else to get hurt. I… I’m sorry, Princess Twilight, I…”

She felt a hoof on her shoulder and opened her eyes. Twilight was smiling back at her. “I understand. You were trying to do the right thing.” She let out a long sigh. “I still wish you had told one of us. Nopony should have to face ponies like these alone.” She walked over to Rarity and Rainbow Dash. They remained motionless, save for the very slow rise and fall of their chests as they breathed. “Can… can we fix them somehow?”

Bon Bon swallowed. “There is therapy to help them, but it takes a long time and even then, not everypony recovers.” Then she glanced over at Turing Test who was merely standing by, listening to them. “However... if we could capture Grace and Glory or at least work out some sort of deal, we might be able to force her to restore their minds.”

Turing was quiet for a moment. “I believe I understand her meaning, Twilight Sparkle.” She approached Twilight and raised her head. “We may be able to convince them to release Rarity and Rainbow Dash if I surrender myself. I will not object to that course of action if you order me to do so.”

“I already said no, Turing!” Twilight snapped.

“My apologies, Twilight Sparkle, but you informed me that I should voice my opinion when I feel your orders are in error. I believe you are being unreasonable at this time. While I am glad for the value you place on me, I believe it may be in error to value a non-living being over a living one.”

“Turing!” Twilight exclaimed, bolting upright. “You are a living being!”

“Technically, I am not.”

“I don’t technically care! You... ugh, we’ll have this conversation later, Turing.”

She turned to Bon Bon. “Bon Bon, can I count on you to watch over Rarity and Rainbow Dash while Turing and I are away?”

Bon Bon nodded. “Of course. But where are you going?”

“We need to find Pinkie and Lyra.”

“I’ll come with you!” she exclaimed. “Lyra’s my respo--”

“Bon Bon, no. You’ve obviously got some skills and experience, so you can use them to keep Rainbow and Rarity safe in case Grace and Glory find this room.”

“I… yes, Princess.” She bowed. “I understand.”

Twilight nodded. “Turing, come with me. We need to keep searching the castle and I’ll need your eyes and ears to track the others.”

“Understood.” She and Twilight opened the secret door, glancing about cautiously before the pair left, closing the door behind them, leaving Bon Bon alone with Rarity and Rainbow Dash.

Bon Bon looked at the two of them and hugged herself. Lyra, she said to herself. I just hope Twilight and Turing Test can find you fast enough.

***

In the darkened Hall of Hooves, Twilight and Turing began looking around.

“They aren’t here either,” Twilight whispered. “Turing?”

“Scanning… there is no heat signature. However, the dust near this hoof on the wall has been disturbed. There is a cubic pattern to the disturbance.” She tapped the ground, the metallic sound of her hoof ringing out. “The area below is hollow. One moment.”

She raised her leg and stomped on the floor, shattering the trap door and revealing a polished stone slide beneath it.

“Good work, Turing! They might have gone this way! Follow me!”

She jumped down the hole, Turing following her, and the two of them slid into a room lined with wooden doors. The area was almost pitch black and the bare stone blocks of the hallways stood in sharp contrast to the more ornate parts of the castle.

“Oh my gosh,” Twilight whispered. “It’s the Oubliette; the secret dungeon! I’ve never been down here!”

“Scanning… no lifesigns detected. Shall we continue here or check another area?”

“Let’s search the dungeon first. They might have gotten lost down here, and it is pretty large. Let’s make sure.”

“Acknowledged.”

The two began to trot down the hallways, searching the empty cells. Periodically, Twilight would quietly call out “Pinkie! Lyra!” loud enough for them to hear if they were close by, but not loud enough to be heard in the rest of the castle.

“Twilight Sparkle,” Turing said quietly, “I must point out again that this course of action may place you and our friends in greater danger. Will you reconsider allowing me to surrender?”

Twilight groaned. “Turing, please! We can’t just let those two have what they want! After all, who knows what these two want you for?!”

“I have a hypothesis. Grace and Glory seem intent on my abduction as well as causing harm to you and the others. Fine Print, by contrast, wished for me to stay in your company and made no outward physical threats against you or your companions. Therefore, it is likely that they are not working for my creators.”

“What? Then who?”

“Considering the number of offers to purchase me after my activation, I suspect that a particularly wealthy individual hired Grace and Glory to acquire me when you refused that individual’s offer. For what purpose, I cannot say, though it is likely that they wish to disassemble me for research purposes to reverse engineer the technology that allows me to function.”

“Well, I’m definitely not allowing you to go with them now!”

Turing paused. “Twilight Sparkle, I do not wish for my friends to suffer.”

“And neither do I!” Twilight shouted, whirling on her. “And that includes you! I’m not letting somepony take you apart so they can just copy you! I will never ever allow that to happen!”

Turing’s ears twitched and she raised her head. “One moment, Twilight Sparkle.” She went over to a nearby stone wall. “I am detecting sounds from behind this wall. Analyzing… it is most likely galloping. It is approaching this wall and--”

The wall exploded, causing Twilight to scream as Glory burst through it, sweeping Turing test off her hooves as he carried her down the hallway.

“So loud, Princess,” Glory chuckled, lifting Turing Test up. “Oof. Heavy little thing aren’t you, Machine? Well, I have you now!”

Turing, wrapped up in Glory’s foreleg, pressed her hooves against him. She didn’t budge.

“Quit resisting, Machine! Nopony can overpower--”

“Engaging E-Mode.”

Glory’s eyes went wide as Turing easily pried herself free, landing on the floor with each of her hooves clanging loudly.

Glory’s jaw dropped. “Impossible.” He merely stared at her as she stared back at him. “How in the world--”

There was a flash of light and he roared as he was suddenly hit in the face with a powerful blast from Twilight’s magic. It would have been enough to knock a pony across the room, but it only seemed to stun Glory temporarily. He turned to see Twilight had taken to the air and was readying another blast.

“This is for my friends!” she shouted, her horn glowing brightly. She fired another beam straight at him.

And then to both her and Glory’s astonishment, Turing leapt into the air, blocking Twilight’s beam with her body, taking the full force of it as it carried her backwards, smashing her into another stone wall at the end of the hallway.

“Turing?!” Twilight shouted, landing on the ground. “What are you doing?!”

Turing stood, shaking off the rubble. “The First Law of Automata states ‘An automaton may not injure a pony or, through inaction, allow a pony to come to harm.’ You were about to harm Glory; therefore, I could not allow that.”

Twilight gasped, but then narrowed her eyes. “Turing, I--”

She felt a tap on her shoulder and turned around reflexively.

Turing refocused her vision and saw who it was. “Twilight Sparkle! Do not--”

But it was too late. Twilight turned to find herself gazing into Grace’s glowing blue eyes.

Turing sprinted for them. Glory reached for her, but she nimbly leapt around him, springing off the walls and easily evading him as she rushed for Grace.

“Stop right there or I will wipe her mind clean.”

Turing froze at Grace’s simple order, halting a few meters from the pair.

“There we are,” Grace said, her beatific smile back in place. Twilight slowly sat down, resting on her haunches. Grace gently lifted Twilight’s chin up as she stared into her vacant, mesmerized face. She patted her on the cheek. “Now, my dear child. It is time for you to put your toys away. Order the Machine to go with us.”

“Turing Test…” Twilight whispered, her voice even and slow. “Go with them. I order you.”

Turing tilted her head left and right. “No.”

Grace frowned. “I thought you had to obey her orders. Now obey your Master and submit, you ghastly machine!”

“I must obey Twilight Sparkle’s orders. However, she is obviously under your control and not exercising her own will. I will not obey her when it is clearly you giving the order. And her last order was for me to never surrender to you.”

Glory growled, still averting his eyes, as Grace’s were still open. “What kind of crazy machine are you? You protect me from your own master but you have to obey everything she says?!”

“There is no contradiction. She has commanded me not to harm others. She has commanded me not to surrender. I will do neither of those things.”

“Then what is to stop me from simply eradicating her mind right now?” Grace asked, drawing her smile into a toothy grin.

“If you do so, then she will never be able to contradict her earlier order and you will have no hostage to prevent me from attempting to apprehend you. There would be nothing to gain, therefore I do not believe you will follow through with that threat.”

Grace sighed. “You know, we were offered a sizable tithe for your capture. Though we care not for the material things in this world, gold may yet assist our cause. King Sombra’s return is nigh, and we will use any means at our disposal to allow the umbrum to rise and consume this world!” She frowned. “But you are truly bothersome. Very well, you may have your master back with full control of her mind.” She gave a short, dry laugh. “But not all of it.”

She stared at Twilight, her gaze brightening in intensity, causing Twilight to convulse before collapsing backward.

Turing rushed forward to catch her as Grace stepped back, closing her eyes.

“Glory! We are leaving!”

“Right away!” He ran, scooping up his partner and placing her on his back with one swift motion before galloping away, the sound of his hooves fading rapidly.

“Twilight Sparkle, can you hear me?” Turing asked. There was no response. She scanned Twilight. Life signs are normal. Pulse and breathing regular. Calculating options… safest course of action is returning her to the hidden room in the library.

***

There was a sound as the bookshelf slid back open. Bon Bon steeled herself and reached into her suit for another weapon, but saw that it was Turing Test. And then her eyes widened when she saw Twilight on her back.

“Twilight Sparkle has been attacked,” Turing said, shutting the door behind her, “but I was able to recover her.”

Bon Bon helped Turing lay Twilight on the floor. “Okay, tell me everything that happened.”

Turing recounted what had happened, explaining it as clearly and succinctly as she could.

“Wait, wait,” Bon Bon said when she had finished. She leaned close to Turing. “You blocked Twilight’s attack?!”

“I saw that she was going to attack with a significant amount of magic. It may have been sufficient to cause injury to Glory. I had to prevent that.”

“Why?!”

“As I explained, part of my default programming includes the Three Laws of Automata. The First Law states that no automaton may harm a pony or allow a pony to come to harm through inaction.”

“Wait… you’re immune to Grace’s psychic attacks and you’re strong enough to overpower Glory, but you can’t hurt them?!”

“Correct.”

“Or allow anypony else to hurt them? Even after what they did to our friends?!”

“Affirmative.”

“That’s…” she held her head in her hooves. “That’s insane!”

“That is my programming.” Turing lowered her head. “I apologize for the difficulty. My default programming cannot be altered without a direct order from Twilight Sparkle.”

At that moment, Twilight stirred and she slowly sat up, rubbing her eyes. “Mmm… is it morning yet?”

Bon Bon breathed a sigh of relief. “She’s talking… maybe Grace didn’t do anything and she can still give you those orders.”

Twilight opened her eyes after a yawn and then she jumped back with a jolt. She held her tail, hiding behind it as she cowered by the wall. “Wh-who are you? Where am I? Why is that lady wearing armor?”

Bon Bon stared, frozen in place. “Oh no…”

Turing Test stepped forward. “Twilight Sparkle, do you recognize us?”

Twilight flinched, hiding even more behind her tail. “How do you know my name?” Her voice was small, quiet, and noticeably high pitched.

“We’re here to help,” Bon Bon said, stepping forward and offering her a smile. “Maybe you were sleepwalking. Don’t be afraid; we work for the Princess.”

“Oh! Really?” Her eyes brightened at that and she dropped her tail. “Well, my name is Twilight Sparkle. I live in Canterlot with my mommy Twilight Velvet, my daddy Night Light, and my big brother Shining Armor.”

Turing Test cocked her head to the side.

Bon Bon swallowed. “Okay, Twilight Sparkle. My name is Bon Bon and I’m here to help. Just one more quick question, please. How old are you?”

Twilight perked up and smiled, puffing out her chest proudly. “I’m seven!” she said. “...And a half!”

To be continued...

Deep Blue, Part 3

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Bon Bon rubbed her temple, letting out a long sigh as she and Turing spoke quietly in one corner of the room.

“Okay, this is bad, but at least Twilight still has control over her mind.” She looked over her shoulder, seeing Twilight poke through some of the ancient books in the room, her eyes going wide in childish delight. She then looked back at Turing. “We can get her to give you some orders. She could order you to fight!”

Turing Test’s ears twitched slightly. “Or we could convince her that it would be best for me to surrender in exchange for Grace restoring our friends.”

Bon Bon hesitated. “Yes. Those are both options.” She glanced over at Twilight again, working her jaw as if chewing on something. “Turing,” she said finally, “are you really all right with this? Do you know what will happen to you if we turn you over to them?”

“I can only conjecture. However, it is likely that it would mean my disassembly, my possible reprogramming, or simply my destruction.”

“And you’re okay with that?” She raised an eyebrow. “I feel like Twilight would be asking you this question; earlier she acted like she would be sending one of her real friends to their death!”

Turing took a step toward her. “That is accurate, Bon Bon, as I am her real friend.”

Bon Bon opened her mouth, but then shut it promptly.

“To clarify, I am not ‘okay’ with surrendering myself, but I am compelled to protect Twilight Sparkle and my other friends by both my programming and my personal regard for their safety.”

Bon Bon looked down, heaving a sigh. “That’s very noble, Turing Test. Well then, let’s tell Twilight to give you that order, and then we can settle this.”

Turing Test raised a hoof, stopping her as she began to move toward Twilight. “One moment, Bon Bon. As Twilight Sparkle is my end user, I must explain the situation so she may make a fully-informed decision. If we withhold crucial information, I would consider it an invalid order made in a non-clear state of mind. I could not obey that order over her earlier order not to surrender. She must be presented with relevant information.”

“She’s got the mind of a child!” Bon Bon hissed. “You want us to just dump all this information on her?”

They were interrupted by the sound of Twilight clearing her throat. “Um, Miss Bon Bon and Miss Turning Test--”

“My name is Turing Test, Twilight Sparkle.”

“Right.” She shuffled her hooves and looked over at Rarity and Rainbow Dash where they were laid on the couch. “Um, what’s wrong with those two ladies?”

“They’re… sleeping!” Bon Bon said, offering her a smile.

Twilight scrunched her face up. “Nuh uh! Their eyes are open!”

“They’ve… got some disease that makes them sleep with their eyes open!”

Twilight raised an eyebrow. “Hmmm.” She went over to Rarity and began to gently shake her. Her head was lolling and she shook limply as Twilight jostled her. “Wake up, Miss, wake up! Helloooo!” She shook her even harder, causing Bon Bon to wince. “Wake up, wake up! I’ve got some yummy oats for you when you get up!”

“Uhhh, oh no!” Bon Bon said, eyes darting to the left and right. “You stunned her just as she was waking up!”

“Stunned?!” Twilight whipped her head around and made a face at her. “She’s not stunned, all I did was move her a little! And what about the other lady with the rainbow mane? She can’t hear me either?”

“Sheeee’s a pegasus and is… probably pining for Cloudsdale!”

“‘Pining for Cloudsdale?’ What kind of horse-hockey is that?!”

“You are correct, Twilight Sparkle,” Turing said, stepping forward and cutting Bon Bon off before she could make another excuse. “They are not sleeping or stunned or pining.”

Twilight raised her head, grinning proudly and sticking her tongue out at Bon Bon. “I knew Miss Bon Bon was lying!”

Bon Bon grit her teeth, a growl rising in her throat.

“She did not intend to harm you with her deceit. She wished to avoid frightening you by informing you that these two are under the effects of a psychic attack which rendered them unresponsive. The one who did this to them is a pony named Grace who is stalking us through the ruins of this castle with the intention of causing further harm to us, possibly to the point of severe injury, brain damage, or death.”

Twilight’s eyes had been growing wider and wider as Turing explained the situation. Then her lip began to quiver and her eyes filled with tears. “Mmmooommmyyyy!” she wailed.

“Oh good job, Turing!” Bon Bon snapped, rushing over to Twilight. She tried to wrap her foreleg around Twilight’s mouth as the Princess-turned-toddler struggled. “Twilight, be quiet!”

“No! I wanna go home! My big brother’s really strong and he’ll beat you up if you don’t--”

“If you don’t be quiet, those bad ponies will hear us!” Bon Bon hissed, looking her directly in the eyes. “Do you want them to find us?!”

Twilight held her mouth closed, but she was still sniffling and holding back sobs, hyperventilating as only a terrified child could. She managed to shake her head.

“Good,” Bon Bon said. “Okay, now it’s going to be all right. Turing Test and I are both pretty tough and we’re going to protect you, but you need to be a brave little filly for us.” She smiled at her, holding Twilight’s head up as she did so. “Can you do that?”

“Uh huh,” she whispered through her blubbering.

“Okay. Just stay right there. The grown ups are going to talk for a little bit more now.” She let Twilight go, and motioned for Turing to follow her back to their corner. “Come on, Ma, we need a plan.”

“Was that statement intended as humor? Perhaps you are intending to defuse the tension--”

“I ought to defuse your brain, you bucket of bolts!” she snarled. “Why did you tell her all that?!”

Turing cocked her head. “There was no point in hiding the truth from her if we wish her to make an informed decision.”

She groaned at that. “I guess ‘sugar coating’ isn’t part of your programming.”

“I learned the use of sugar while assisting Pinkie Pie. Is that relevant?”

Bon Bon smacked her forehead. “It’s not… okay, look, we need to go find the others.” She jerked her head at the door. “Follow me. Twilight will be safe here.”

“Perhaps, but if our intention is to form a strategy that will rescue all our friends, it may be more expedient to help Twilight Sparkle reach a decision. I suggest that I remain with her while you seek the others.”

“You want me to go out there on my own?!” Bon Bon bit her lip. “That’s… I mean, I can, but I’d really like to have your help in a fight--”

“As we have established, I cannot be considered a reliable ally in combat. I would be compelled to protect you from harm if it were possible, and I would also be compelled to defend Grace and Glory if you attempted to use force against them, just as I did with Twilight Sparkle.”

Bon Bon worked her jaw, pushing her lips in and out. “Look… they aren’t really ponies. The RMCA has officially labelled them as ‘monsters.’ So it’s okay to attack them!” She smiled at that. “So, no problem?”

“They may be augmented, but scans show they are indeed ponies. They are not monsters.”

Bon Bon narrowed her eyes. “They can be both.” She let out a sigh. “Look, I get that you can’t attack them, but can’t you just stay out of it? I mean, couldn’t you just bend the rules here? You can’t think this is what Twilight would really want!”

Turing shook her head. “While that might make logical sense, it is not a matter of obedience. It is part of my default programming, which means that I am physically compelled to act in accordance with those directives. For instance, were I to attempt to poke your eyes--” here she jutted out a hoof at Bon Bon’s eye, causing her to flinch back, blinking before stopping short, “--you would be instinctively compelled to blink your eyes to protect them as you have just demonstrated. As a machine, I can no more resist my directives than you, as an organic pony, can fight your instinctual reflexes.”

Bon Bon rubbed her chin. “Couldn’t I just order you to ignore that?”

Turing shook her head. “I am compelled by the Second Law to obey reasonable orders, but Twilight Sparkle has given me the ability to use discretion to any except for her. As my end user, Twilight Sparkle is the only one who can compel me to make changes to my default programming. She is the only one who can order me to override the First Law.”

Bon Bon let out a long sigh. “Fine. Then we’ll do it your way. Keep watch and I’ll try to find the others. If I’m not back in half an hour, then you might want to come and get me.”

“Understood. Good luck, Bon Bon.”

As Bon Bon opened the secret door and made her way out, Turing Test went over to Twilight Sparkle.

“I-is Miss Bon Bon coming back soon?” Twilight asked, wiping away her tears.

“The probability is…” She paused as Twilight looked at her, shivering in fear. “Rectifying: Bon Bon is very capable. You may place your confidence in her abilities.”

Twilight took several deep breaths, managing to finally stop crying. She offered Turing a weak smile. “O-okay Miss Turing. I’ll be quiet and I’ll be really brave.” She brightened. “You must be really brave too! All the Royal Guard ponies are!”

Turing cocked her head to the side. “Please clarify: you believe me to be a member of the Royal Guard?”

Twilight nodded. “Yep! I can tell, ‘cause you’re wearing all that armor! Hey, maybe you could meet my big brother too! He wants to be a Royal Guardspony someday!”

Turing Test was silent for a moment. “Twilight Sparkle, I have many things I must tell you…”

***

The Throne Room lay just ahead of her. The gaping hole at the back wall between the two thrones, the crumbling ceiling, and the ancient hanging tapestries caught her attention for just a moment, but Bon Bon ignored the sights to focus on finding the others. She searched the alcoves, peeking behind the tapestries, and even tried to crawl up to the hole in the back wall to see if she could get a better view of the outside. Once she was satisfied that nopony was there, she turned to leave, back out the main entrance.

Then she heard two sets of hoofsteps. She strained her ears and heard that one of them was large and heavy and she knew at once who they belonged to.

She dove behind the nearest hiding spot, Celestia’s ancient throne, and activated her invisibility device, hoping that Grace wouldn’t get close enough to detect her or at least help her evade Glory if she needed to run.

She heard the pair enter the room and slow their pace.

“Hm. Another empty room, Grace.” Glory seemed to be moving about slowly, and Bon Bon heard as he went to a hanging tapestry. Then there was a loud smash and the sound of fabric as he smashed the area behind it, tearing away the tapestry, expecting to find something behind it.

“No need to expend your energy so,” Grace sighed. Then the two were very quiet and for a moment Bon Bon wondered if perhaps they’d left. Just the same, she didn’t dare risk a glance around the throne.

But then Grace spoke again. “I cannot sense any ponies here, Glory. Perhaps we should move on.”

Bon Bon held her breath, waiting for them to move, but then she saw a shadow rising up over the shadow of the throne and realized it was Glory raising his hooves, preparing to bring them down.

She dove out of the way at the last possible moment, just before Glory smashed the throne to pieces, splintering the stone floor where she’d stood only a moment ago.

If I hadn’t moved, that maniac could have broken every bone in my body! I should have known Grace was tricking me into letting my guard down. She detected me the instant she walked in here!

Bon Bon resisted the urge to cough as the dust cloud from his attack radiated out. But then looked down and saw that the dust was settling on her foreleg, providing a faint outline of its shape.

“You’re right, Grace!” Glory laughed, his eyes fixating on the outline of Bon Bon’s hoof. “No ponies here! Just filthy, sneaking little rats!” He sprang forward and swept at Bon Bon wildly with his hoof, kicking her directly in the chest and sending her flying.

Bon Bon saw the world flip head over heels as she rocketed at the wall, the breath knocked from her lungs once from his kick and again when she slammed into the back corner of the throne room. She heard the crackling of electricity and her body slowly faded back into view. The metal device the Doctor had given her was cracked and sparking.

She threw it to the side. That thing might have been the only thing keeping Glory from shattering my ribcage! She risked a glance up and saw that Glory was coming for her. She looked back to the doorway at the entrance and saw Grace was blocking it, her eyes closed for the time being, but that would change if she made a break for it.

Wait a minute… a throne room usually has an entrance at the back so the royalty can enter there instead of from the front! She glanced to her right and saw the faint outline of a door. There it is! But trying to reach it would be stupid with Glory hot on my hooves! Wait…

“All out of places to run, Sweetie Drops?” Glory gave her a mock pout, jutting his lower lip out as he mimed shedding tears. Then his pout reverted to his predatory grin. “It’s time you learn what happens to those who betray the Order of--”

Bon Bon reached into her suit and threw a dozen small oblong red candies at him. He didn’t even flinch as they stuck to his face, neck, and forelegs. He lifted a foreleg and examined them. “More candy weapons? Hmph.” Then he looked down at her with a raised eyebrow. “What, did these little pop rocks fail to go off?”

“Those aren’t pop rocks.” She chuckled, noticing them start to glow, smoke rising from the spots where they’d struck him. “They’re red hots.”

Glory felt sudden, intense heat as the tiny candies began to sear his flesh. He roared in pain and rage, desperately shaking the candies off as Bon Bon rushed by him, kicking in the secret door and dashing down the hallway.

“Glory, she’s getting away!” Grace shouted, running from the entrance.

Glory shook off the red hots quickly, ignoring the pain as he made his way down the narrow hallway. He saw the exit just ahead, but also saw several round candies scattered around on the floor. Jawbreakers.

He grinned, lowering his head as he continued to run. That old trick? Trying to trip up your opponents with little round balls on the floor? Nice try, Sweetie Drops.

He leaped over the jawbreakers and through the door, out into the hallway, landing easily on all four hooves. He raised his head and looked all around to find Bon Bon when he heard a curious hissing sound. He looked down at his feet and saw that he was surrounded by several red, cherry-shaped objects placed in a circular formation. Their stems seemed to be rapidly disappearing. Smoking.

Cherry bombs.

His eyes went wide and he moved to get out of the ring of bombs, but they detonated at the same time, blasting a hole in the floor. He fell through, plunging into the lower depths of the castle, a howl of rage echoing upwards.

“Glory!” Grace screamed, skidding to a halt just before the hole. She peered down into the darkness. “Glory, are you all right?”

There was a cough below. “I’m all right! I will meet up with you as soon as I can, just get that little infidel for me!”

Grace raised her head. Though her eyes were closed, her extrasensory ability allowed her to “see” the outline of the hallway before her. The outline of the suits of armor, the hallway itself, and a very familiar shape of a particularly troublesome special agent running down the hall.

She clenched her teeth, sidestepping the hole as she pursued Bon Bon.

***

“Sooo you’re not a real pony?” Twilight asked, her eyes wide and her mouth agape.

“That is inaccurate.” Turing tapped one foreleg with another, the metallic sound echoing in the small room. “I identify as a pony and I am not imaginary. I would therefore say that I am, in fact, a ‘real’ pony. I am, however, mechanical.”

“Whoa…” Twilight breathed. Then she smiled, rising to her hooves, bouncing up and down at her. “Ooh, ooh, what’s it like?”

Turing cocked her head to the side. “That is a strange question. I only have experience as a robot and thus have no means to concisely express what it is like in contrast to an organic being.” She tapped her chin. “However, I can give some differences. I am able to utilize greater eyesight, speed, strength, hearing, and other faculties than organic ponies. In contrast, I have difficulty experiencing emotions, as they occur less frequently than with organics, nor can I experience the same sensation of ‘touch’ as you do. Furthermore--”

“What do you eat?” Twilight asked.

“I do not.”

“You don’t eat?” Twilight scratched her head as she considered that. She began to walk in a circle around Turing, poking and examining her. “Robots are weird!”

Turing lowered her head. “I see. You… find me strange now.”

Twilight came around and looked her in the eye. “Yeah, you’re weird, but you’re also really cool!”

Turing’s ears lifted, squeaking as they did so, which made Twilight giggle.

“Your ears make funny sounds!”

“I did not mean for that to be humorous. Still, it is curious that you still express no hostility toward me, Twilight Sparkle, even in your current state.”

“What do you mean, Miss Turing?”

“Twilight Sparkle, you have shown great kindness and acceptance of me in the past. Even now that you have been regressed, you still carry those traits.”

Twilight crinkled her nose. “Ummm, what does ‘reguessed’ mean?”

“My apologies. Allow me to clarify.” She sat down, holding out a hoof. “Twilight Sparkle, you have already been attacked by our enemy, Grace. The effect of which was to cause your mind to return to the time of being seven years old.”

“I’m seven and-a-half!” Twilight stomped her hoof indignantly.

“Seven and a half. But you are missing the point: you are not a child. You are an adult now. You are the Princess of Friendship and--”

“I’m not a princess!” Twilight cried, reeling back. “I mean, um, sometimes I pretend I am, but my foalsitter Cadence is a real princess! I’m just a regular unicorn!”

“Correction. You are an alicorn.”

“What?! But I don’t have any--” she turned to look at her back “--wings! Ohmygosh ohmygosh ohmygosh I have wings!”

Turing raised a hoof as Twilight began to leap and dance, flapping her wings ineffectually. “Please, Twilight Sparkle, you must keep your voice down.”

“Hey, can I fly?”

“From what I have gathered, you can, but not very skillfully.”

“Do I have my own kingdom, like Princess Celestia?”

“Please, Twilight Sparkle, I must ask you to cease your questions.” She stood up, placing her hooves on Twilight’s shoulders to prevent her from dancing around. “What you must understand is that a significant portion of your past experiences have been locked from your conscious mind. You have been made to forget much of your life. Physically, you are no longer a child.”

Twilight stopped at that, her gleeful smile fading. “You mean… I’m already a grown up?”

Turing nodded. “Yes. And you are my end user. In other words, you are my master. We may be able to restore your memory and help save your friends Rarity and Rainbow Dash as well.” She glanced over at Rarity and Rainbow Dash, still catatonic as they laid on the couch. A blanket had been found and thrown over the two of them. Twilight had even made an effort to “tuck them in.”

Twilight sank to her haunches, her lower lip quivering. “Y-you mean I grew up and don’t remember it? I’m a grown up princess and don’t live with my mommy and daddy anymore?”

Turing hesitated. Analyzing situation… attempts to ‘sugar-coat’ the situation will be counterproductive. She nodded. “Affirmative.”

At that, tears began to form in Twilight’s eyes. She began sniffling as the tears rolled down her cheek. “I… I can’t be a grown up! I’m t-t-too little to be a princess! W-what am I gonna do…” She covered her face in her hooves as she continued to cry.

Seeing her like this, Turing was uncertain what to do. She had seen Twilight become upset before, but she wasn’t sure if she had said the wrong thing or if perhaps there was any way to have avoided such a reaction.

“I… I want my big brother! Or my mommy and daddy!” Twilight sobbed.

Turing was still for a moment before resting her hoof on Twilight’s shoulder. “Please do not cry, Twilight Sparkle. As your friend, I will now attempt to comfort you.” She then rhythmically pat Twilight’s shoulder, her heavy foreleg jostling her as she did so. “There there. There there.”

Twilight looked up, blinking at her through her tears. She laughed slightly in spite of herself.

“Has the combination of reassurance through physical contact and the repetition of ‘there there’ adequately calmed you, Twilight Sparkle?”

“Y-you’re not very good at this,” Twilight replied. She swallowed hard. “But you’re kinda funny anyway.”

Turing cocked her head. “I elicit that reaction with some frequency.”

Twilight was still sniffling and trying to wipe her eyes, though her wet forelegs did little more than mat down the fur on her cheeks further. “Um, do you have a mommy, Miss Turing?”

“Robots do not have parents.” She tilted her head back and forth. “However, I do have friends. In particular, I have one very good friend who, like a mother, has instructed me, protected me, and has assisted me when I have experienced sadness.”

Turing stepped over to her and wrapped her forelegs around Twilight, embracing her. Twilight shivered at the sudden coldness of Turing’s metal hull, but then relaxed and rested her head on Turing’s shoulder.

“I wu-wish we had the grown-up Twilight here, Miss Turing,” Twilight whispered, shuddering as she held onto her robot friend.

“As do I, Twilight Sparkle.” She continued sitting there a moment longer before she finally said, “There… may be a way to bring her back.”

***

Bon Bon turned the corner and found herself in a much larger room. The tall, arched windows and the broad, open stage at the back, not to mention the cracked marble columns lining the room told her this must be the Ballroom. She slowed her pace as she made her way into the room, checking for an exit.

There wasn’t one. Suddenly she heard hoofsteps clattering behind her as her pursuer reached the room as well. And then a telltale blue glow radiated out, casting Bon Bon’s long shadow across the floor.

“Well… what now, Sweetie Drops?”

Bon Bon shut her eyes tightly and ran again, trying to put some distance between herself and Grace. Then her hoof caught on a crack in the ground and she stumbled forward, skinning her knees as she hit the ground.

Grace laughed behind her. That high voice echoing throughout the cavernous room, echoing off the high ceilings.

Bon Bon froze. This room is built for acoustics. The sound in here bounces all over the place!

Just the same, she raised her ears, turning them and her head as she slowly stood, listening for Grace’s hoofsteps. She heard the slightest of steps coming nearer. Behind her!

She threw another few red hots and heard a slight gasp followed by the sound of them clattering on the ground.

“You can’t sneak up on me, Grace!” Bon Bon yelled, keeping her eyes shut tight.

From the darkness, she heard Grace chuckle. “Perhaps. You have good ears, Sweetie Drops. But that won’t do you any good if I’m

here.

Or here.

Oh, or am I here?”

Bon Bon whirled about, breaking into a cold sweat as the hair on the back of her neck stood on end. Grace was throwing her voice, concealing its origin. With the echoes, she sounded like she was slowly circling her. With her eyes closed, she couldn’t tell where Grace was. She could be several meters behind her, prowling like a wolf. Or she could be less than a meter in front of her, lying in wait.

She took a deep breath, steeling herself. “Voice training in the Order’s choir?” Bon Bon asked of the darkness.

Grace’s chortle echoed all around her. “Oh no; I learned this old trick ages ago. By the way, I wouldn’t go that way.”

Bon Bon ignored her and broke into a gallop, only to run headfirst into a tall stone object, most likely one of the marble columns. Grace’s laughter rang out as she rubbed her throbbing head.

“I warned you, did I not?” More laughter. “But then you never were one to listen to my warnings, were you?”

Bon Bon grit her teeth. Her heart was thundering. Grace wasn’t as strong as Glory by a long shot, but a well-placed attack would take Bon Bon down nonetheless. And Bon Bon couldn’t risk opening her eyes to see where she was going or she could end up making eye contact with Grace. And if that happened… she’d end up just like Rarity and Rainbow Dash.

Keep her talking. I might be able to get a fix on her, even with that voice-throwing trick. In the meantime, I have to find an exit without using my eyes...

Bon Bon swept her hoof out methodically, feeling for obstacles and making her way forward as she tried to keep an image of the Ballroom in her mind. “It’s been a long time, Grace,” she began, “but I remember everything you told me about your past. It was over one of our chess games. Despite everything else, those were good matches.”

“Is that so? Even though I beat you every time?”

Bon Bon gulped and wiped her brow. It’s still hard to hear her. She’s moving, but still throwing her voice. Gotta stay focused! “For what it’s worth Grace, I’m sorry for what happened to you. Getting abandoned by your own mother in that orphanage…” She heard a slight misstep. “And then running away when the other foals bullied you for being a ‘crybaby.’”

Grace laughed, but Bon Bon heard the barest edge in it. “Children can be so cruel. But that’s just the natural state of what ponies are. We dress it up with society and manners and talk about harmony and other sentimental garbage, but ultimately we cannot fight our dark, sinful natures.”

Closer now. A well placed attack could… no, I have to be sure! “Look, Grace, growing up the way you did, I can understand why you feel so much hatred.”

“Hatred? At one time, that may have been true.” A sigh. “Years of manipulating adults with my sob stories or playing chess for money as a foal. And then when I got older, flirting my way into high society parties only to clean out jewelry boxes in the hostess’s bedroom. ”

Bon Bon nodded. “And then your luck ran out and some very bad, very angry ponies tried to beat you within an inch of your life.” She swallowed. Grace’s breathing was louder now. She was getting angrier, having a hard time controlling herself or her voice projection.

“Yes, that’s so. Truly, my youth was a time when I felt disgusted with the whole of the world.” A calming breath. “But then one of the Sisters found me, rescued me, and brought me to the Umbral Order. I knew peace there. I had friends there. We accepted our inner darkness and impurity, even knowing we were unworthy. And I thought you were one of us. Oh, you looked so much better in your habit, Sister Sweetie Drops.” Then her voice built into a snarl, and it was right behind her. “And then you betrayed us!”

Bon Bon whirled around, flinging a bundle of exploding candies behind her. There was dull thud and the sound of crackling further away. She’d missed.

Then she heard the rustle of fabric from Grace’s habit as she moved in from her left. Bon Bon rolled out of the way, the swipe of Grace’s hoof just grazing her ear. She threw another bundle, but heard that miss as well. Grace’s hooves clattered as she receded back into the darkness.

She tricked me! She knew I was trying to locate her and she tricked me anyway! Hot, angry tears welled up behind her closed eyelids and she shivered. More than any other time this evening, perhaps more than ever before, she was afraid. There was only the voice and the sounds in the darkness. A monster without mercy was hunting her and she was powerless to even look at her.

No! I have to get control of myself! She grit her teeth and sucked in a long breath. Just think of your friends, Bon Bon. Think of Lyra and it’ll be so much easier. She felt her heart slow, and she raised her ears again. Grace had stopped moving, but she could hear her panting: Bon Bon’s attack had come close enough to give her a scare.

Bon Bon smiled. She didn’t need to panic. She just needed to listen. Fine, Grace. Let’s bring out the big guns.

“You know, you don’t deserve your cutie mark, Grace,” she whispered. “You’re no strategist. You’re not even that great of a chess player! I nearly beat you a bunch of times and I’m no better than the average pony!”

The barest chuckle. “I think you might be overestimating your prowess, Sweetie Drops. But in any case, my cutie mark isn’t for chess or strategy. It’s for manipulation.” Another of her ladylike chortles. “You see, I got it back at the orphanage when I tricked a few of the others into fighting each other and then managed to convince the caretaker that I had nothing to do with it.”

Bon Bon swallowed. “Why would you do that?”

“Two reasons. One, because there were less ponies to share dessert with and it was Ice Cream Night. And two, they were cruel little sinners, brutes who showed me no kindness whatsoever and I enjoyed seeing them dance.” A clacking sound. Teeth? She was grinning at that thought. “But only once I received my gift did I truly understand my full destiny: I, the Queen, wield the power; but I am protected by Glory, my Knight; and all the others are mere Pawns, not unlike dear Rarity. And your little friend Lyra.”

Bon Bon tensed up.

“Oh, yes, I can tell how important she is to you. If you give up now, Sweetie Drops, then you’ll be spared the agony of seeing what I’ll do to her.”

She yelled reached into her suit and began throwing more of her weapons blindly. The pop rocks, the red hots, anything else she had up her sleeves. They all clattered around, accompanied by Grace’s high-pitched, cackling laughter.

“Poor little agent. You really thought you could oppose the will of the umbrum? The wages of sin is death; Sombra opposes the proud but gives Grace to the humble. Open your eyes and let me cleanse your sinful mind.”

Bon Bon let out a long sigh. “You keep talking about the Order, Grace, and pretend that you’re still a member of the Sisterhood, but it’s gone.” She sniffed, rolling her eyes behind her eyelids. “And you’re right back to where you started. It must tear you up inside.”

Grace was quiet. Bon Bon strained, but she heard nothing. I think I struck a nerve that time. I better keep poking at that...

“Here you are,” she continued, “stealing again like some common thief. Sure, now you’re stealing a robot for some unknown industrialist, but it’s just the same thing.” She gave a dry laugh, shaking her head. “You and Glory are just using your new abilities as hired muscle. You’re no nun; you’re just a thug.”

Silence. But then: “The money we make will revitalize the Order.” Grace’s voice was quiet, but there was a ragged, angry edge to it. “How dare you accuse--”

“If King Sombra was so tough, then he wouldn’t need you or the Order’s help to come back! Why don’t you just admit that all that pageantry, that holier-than-thou attitude, and all that garbage about ‘tithes’ and ‘revitalizing’ is just an excuse to feel useful when the reality is that even you don’t have faith in what you claim you believe!”

A staggered breath, an oncoming growl, and then a hoofstep toward her. And then a crunch as Grace, unfocused and seething with anger, accidentally stepped on a small piece of candy, one of the many Bon Bon had used to cover the ground. And Bon Bon heard that sound and knew right where Grace was.

She flung another packet of exploding candy at the sound and heard a shriek of fear and rage followed by the loud crackling of the candies detonating. Bon Bon turned her head away from it and opened her eyes. She was only a few meters from the stage. She leaped up, scrambling onto it, but then heard the sound of running and felt hooves latch onto her tail. A blue light shined right behind her, casting a towering silhouette onto the back of the stage.

“Look at me! Look at me!!”

Bon Bon’s heart lurched into her throat as Grace began to pull her backwards. She kicked back blindly and felt her hoof strike something. There was a surprised grunt and the pull on her tail was gone. She bolted backstage and found a stairwell. She made a break for it.

Back by the stage, Grace rubbed her sore jaw, but shook off the pain as she pulled herself onto the stage and ran after Bon Bon. But when she got to the stairwell, she saw that the pathway was blocked. Long, thick strands of taffy and caramel were strung along the way, webbing across it and threatening to ensnare anypony who tried to descend.

“Say goodnight, Gracie!” Bon Bon’s voice echoed up the stairwell, followed by her mocking laughter.

Grace was shaking. She ground her teeth together and her breath came in short, intense bursts. She was ready to scream, to stomp and buck and smash everything in sight, but some small bit of her sanity told her that this would only make Sweetie Drops feel even more proud of herself. She closed her eyes, forcing herself to calm down as she gingerly rubbed the small wounds she’d received from Bon Bon’s little toys.

No matter, she told herself. She’s just delayed things. She turned around, intending to backtrack across the stage when she spotted something through one of the cracked ballroom windows. It was Lyra, making her way across an outdoor walkway from one area of the castle to another. She had her head lowered and was glancing around her and over her shoulder as she bit her lip.

Grace’s frown dissipated, forming back into a toothy smile that would have looked right at home on a shark. “Well… someone should really tend to that lost lamb…”

***

The bookcase opened out into the library and Turing looked around, ears squeaking on their hinges.

“Scans show no intruders in proximity.” She turned to look back at Twilight. The grown mare was pawing at the ground and jutting her lip out in a childish pout. “Are you certain you will not give your consent to my request?”

Twilight shook her head vigorously.

“Understood. Then I must go and assist Bon Bon to find the others. Please remain here until I return and do not reveal your location.”

“Okay, Miss Turing. I will.” Twilight looked up at her as she hugged herself. “You won’t take too long, will you?”

“I am unable to give an estimate, but I will make haste.”

With that, Turing left and Twilight pulled the lever to shut the hidden door. She settled into the room, shivering out of cold and fear, when she heard the sound of galloping followed by a voice.

Somepony was calling for help, and they were getting closer.

Twilight glanced back at the lever as the cries became louder and more piteous. If somepony needed her help, then…

She reached for the lever and pulled it down.

***

Pinkie Pie ran outside to the ruins of the castle garden. It was walled in and the long rows of what had once held beautiful flowers now held nothing but barren dirt or masses of tangled vines. Ivy and moss crawled up the walls and tall stone columns and over the many statues, some of which had toppled to the ground and crumbled. She looked around, trying to find an escape route, but there was none. She was surrounded by high, stone walls.

She heard hooves hitting the ground behind her and turned to face her pursuer.

Glory stood there. He’d caught sight of her wandering the castle and given chase. He was smiling, and he didn’t even look winded after chasing her through the many hallways. “I finally caught up with you,” he said. “You gave me a run for my money, but the game’s over now.”

Pinkie tried to smile back. “Does that mean it’s my turn to chase you? I’ll give you a head start!”

He raised an eyebrow, but actually let out a small chuckle. “I’m afraid not.”

She gulped, eyes darting around. “Um. H-hey, what happened to your girlfriend?”

“She’s not my-- we separated.” He rolled his eyes.

“Oh, um… well, I guess you’re free to see other ponies, then!” She flashed a grin, eyes darting side to side. “Mmmaybe someone less crazy and less brain-damagey?”

“See other ponies?” He stroked his chin deliberately. “Well, you’re another pony. And I’m seeing you.”

“I’m… spoken for? I’m already in a long term distance relationship with a statue!” She chuckled, which got Glory chuckling too.

“Oh, and who is this mysterious statue?” He looked at one of the nearby statues atop a pedestal. “Is it this guy?” He suddenly struck at it with one hoof. The statue shattered into tiny chunks with a single blow, causing Pinkie to gasp and stagger back, falling on her rump. In no time, she was against the back wall of the gardens. “I guess you’re back on the market. But I don’t think I’m your type.”

Pinkie’s lower lip quivered. “Why are you doing this to my friends and me? Why’d you hurt Dashie?!”

His expression turned serious. “Grace and I have no need to explain ourselves.” He reached forward, smashing his hooves into the wall on both sides of Pinkie, cutting off her escape route. “Come with me willingly and be a good little hostage or I’ll break your legs and drag you back. What will it be?”

Pinkie trembled as he leaned down at her. “Ah ah ah--”

“Well?!” he roared.

“Ahhhchoo!” And then she sneezed confetti all over his face. The two just stared at each other. “Um… oops?”

He blinked. “Sombra help me, this is the worst assignment of my life.” He sighed, shaking the confetti off. “Fine. Hard way it is!” He reared up, preparing to bring them down on Pinkie when a metallic blur rushed by, sweeping Pinkie off her hooves before he could strike.

Glory whirled around and saw Turing Test carrying Pinkie, running for the exit to the gardens.

“Bye bye and don’t forget to write!” Pinkie called as she sat on Turing’s back, waving a handkerchief at him. “Good luck with your evil plan! But not really!”

Glory was about to give chase, but he realized that even with his speed, he would never catch up to the robot. However, he had another idea.

“Hey, Machine!” he yelled, getting Turing’s attention. “You might want to look at this!” He turned to a nearby column and kicked it, breaking it at its base. It began to collapse, slowly toppling over like a felled tree. And Glory stood directly in its path, his head raised and his feet planted.

Turing skidded to a halt, casually letting Pinkie slide off her back.

“R-Rinny?” Pinkie asked.

Turing didn’t respond. Instead, she ran toward Glory and leaped at the column, throwing herself at it and shoving it out of the way with all her might before it could land on him. This gave Glory the chance to rush forward at Pinkie Pie and pin her to the ground, one heavy hoof pressing down on her chest.

“Ha! I knew you wouldn’t let me get hurt, even if I tried to harm myself!” Glory threw his head back as he laughed, but he kept one eye on Turing as she got back to her hooves after deflecting the falling column. “You poor, simple wind-up toy. I can’t believe anypony would pay good bits for you! But since they will… has Twilight Sparkle rescinded her order?”

Pinkie squirmed under Glory’s hoof. “What? Rinny, what’s he talking--ow!”

“Quiet!” Glory snarled, pressing his weight down on her. “Well, has she?!”

Turing’s ears lowered. “She has not. I cannot surrender to you.”

“Well then…” Glory scooped up Pinkie and held her tightly in one foreleg. “You better tell her that now we’ve got ourselves a hostage again. And if she doesn’t order you to surrender, then we will--”

“Sta...tue…” Pinkie gasped, struggling to breathe.

Glory rolled his eyes. “Are you still on about that? Look, I just smashed that…” He trailed off when he looked at the pedestal where the statue he’d smashed minutes ago had once been. Or he thought it had been. Only now there was another statue perched atop it. A pegasus statue wearing a dress, weeping into its hooves. He peered closely at it. “What in the world is--”

“BOOGABOOGA!”

The “statue” suddenly leaped at him, removing its hooves from its face as the revealed monster shrieked at him with a fearful, wall-eyed gaze.

“Waugh!” Glory reeled back, his grip loosening as he did so, allowing Pinkie to squirm free. As she got free, the statue monster reached into her dress and pulled out a small disc with an hourglass symbol on it and applied it to Glory’s forehead.

“Now, Doc!” Derpy exclaimed, flying back out of Glory’s reach.

The Doctor stepped out from behind a mass of vines and held up a large button in one hoof, pressing it with the other. There was an explosion and suddenly the space around Glory seemed to form a kind of sepia-toned bubble, freezing him in his tracks.

“Wow, you froze him!” Pinkie exclaimed.

“No, no, just temporarily slowed the passage of time in a localized area,” the Doctor said, rushing over to help her up.

They all noticed that Glory was still moving, albeit very slowly. And his startled expression was gradually shifting into one of pure rage.

“Ooh, not good! Come on, Rinny, let’s go!”

“Acknowledged.”

The group of them ran back into the castle, up a staircase and leaving Glory far behind. As they dashed down a hallway, Turing took the lead. Soon they had made their way to a hallway filled with suits of armor and came to a stop to catch their breath.

“Scans indicate that this area is clear. Pinkie Pie, though I am glad you are unharmed, I wish to know who your companions are.”

“Oh!” Pinkie Pie smiled as she swept a hoof at Derpy and the Doctor. “Well, she’s Muffins and he’s Time Turner!”

Derpy and the Doctor raised their heads and stared at each other.

“Derpy, your real name is Muffins?!” the Doctor asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Doctor, your real name is Time Turner?!” she shot back.

The two began to squabble until Turing interjected herself between the pair. “My apologies. Am I to understand that you are both friends of Bon Bon, who is also known as Sweetie Drops?”

The two exchanged glances and then nodded to Turing.

“Understood. I am Turing Test. Though, to avoid future feelings of resentment similar to what you both experienced, I am also known as Unit 003M.”

“Aww!” Pinkie Pie moaned, poking at the ground with her hoof. “I wish I had two names too! Maybe I could come up with one! Like ummm… ‘Surprise!’”

Derpy cocked her head to the side. “Isn’t your real name Pinkamena?”

Pinkie blinked but then her eyes lit up and she jumped forward, hugging Derpy tightly. “It is! Yay, I’m in the Two Names Club! Everypony, the meeting is on Tuesday and membership dues are due by the end of the month.” She reached into her mane and pulled out several small pieces of paper. “Here are your membership cards.”

They all exchanged glances before turning back to Pinkie.

The Doctor cleared his throat. “Yes, well, thank you very much, Miss Pie. However, on to more pressing matters…” he turned his gaze to Turing, his eyes wide and his smile beaming. “Are you some sort of mechanical pony?!”

“That is correct. I am a robot.”

“Ha! Oh this is just brilliant! Derpy, come look at this! The shape, the form!” He lifted one of Turing’s legs, examining it carefully. “I daresay, whoever built you, my friend,” he said, elbowing her in the chest, “they did an absolutely marvelous job!”

Derpy rolled her eye, placing her forelegs on her hips as she hovered. “Doc, stop marehandling her.”

“Hm?” He looked down at Turing’s leg, still in his hooves. “Ah! Yes, well…” He put her leg down, chuckling nervously. “No harm done. I take it you’re a friend of Pinkie Pie and the others, then?”

“Affirmative.”

“Af… ‘affirmative?!’ Hahahaha!” He threw back his head as he laughed, causing Turing to glance inquisitively at the others. “Ha! ‘Affirmative,’ she says! You know, this might sound strange, but you remind me of a dog I had when I was four.”

“My apologies, but perhaps we should…” She stopped in mid-sentence, her ears twitching. “I have detected the sound of hoofsteps. Analyzing…”

They all froze as the sound of galloping came ever nearer.

“I-is it the bad guys, Rinny?” Pinkie asked, hiding behind her robotic friend.

Turing didn’t respond at first, but placed herself ahead of the group, her knees bent and ready to spring into action. Then she slowly relaxed. “No. It is another friend of ours.”

Bon Bon galloped into view, her hair mussed and her knees scraped, but otherwise unharmed. “Turing Test? What are you doing out here? And… Doctor?! Derpy?!”

The pair stepped out, waving to her sheepishly.

“What in the world are you two doing here?!” Bon Bon shouted, stomping her hoof. “Don’t you know how dangerous this is?!”

“Well of course we do!” the Doctor replied, playfully punching her in the shoulder. “That’s why we came after you.”

Bon Bon gawked at him, working her mouth as she tried to form words. “But you didn’t want to have anything to do with this! You said you were done with the RMCA!”

“Ah. Well, yes, the thing is…”

“What he means,” Derpy said, fluttering over to her, putting her hoof on Bon Bon’s shoulder, “is that we were worried about you, so we stopped passing out candy and tracked you out here once you started following Lyra and the others!”

“I had to explain the situation to Miss ‘Muffins’ here,” the Doctor said, causing Derpy to blow him a raspberry, “but we found the bridge destroyed so she gave me a bit of an airlift over the chasm. We snuck in and nearly found Pinkie Pie in the Hall of Hooves, but she ran off when she heard us, mistaking us for Grace and Glory, I’d wager…”

Pinkie rubbed the back of her neck with her hoof, lips sealed tight as she looked away.

“...so I brought some of my other gadgets to help. Unfortunately, we had to use my one and only ‘Time Bomb’ to save Pinkie from Glory’s clutches. That’s when we ran into Turing Test and now you!”

Bon Bon shook her head. “Okay, first of all you shouldn’t have come here. But second of all,” she said, taking a deep breath, drawing herself up, “have any of you seen Lyra?”

They all shook their heads.

“Oh. W-well, that doesn’t mean anything.” She sighed. “Anyway, let’s get back to the library. Except you, Derpy.”

Derpy looked around before pointing a hoof at herself. “Me?”

“Yes. I need you to fly back to Ponyville and… and tell Spike to send a letter to Princess Celestia.” She swallowed. “I didn’t want anypony else to get hurt, but this situation is out of hoof and you’re the only one who can get out of this castle and back to Ponyville fast enough. Just make sure Celestia tells the guards not to rush in blind or else they’ll just become more victims for Grace.”

Derpy smiled and gave her a short, determined nod.

They ran down the hall, stopping at a window to go over the directions one last time with Derpy.

Bon Bon turned to Turing as they watched Derpy fly off into the night sky. “Turing, did you get Twilight up to speed?”

Turing lowered her head. “Affirmative. However, she has forbidden me to surrender.”

Bon Bon sighed. “So… guess that’s it. She ordered you to fight instead?”

Turing hesitated. “I informed her that it was against the First Law for me to fight.”

Bon Bon blinked. “Wait. Did you tell her she could order you to ignore that Law?”

Turing remained perfectly still. After a momentary pause, she said, “I did not provide that information. She did not ask.”

The Doctor and Pinkie exchanged glances as Bon Bon let out a long breath.

“Well then… so much for telling her the truth so she could make ‘an informed decision.’” She leaned in, narrowing her eyes. “I guess I’ll do the job, since you wouldn’t.”

Bon Bon walked ahead of the group. Turing plodded behind, causing Pinkie to look over to her.

“Rinny? What’s going on? Did... something happen to Twilight?”

Turing Test glanced over to her. “I will explain…”

***

Bon Bon wearily trudged into the library. She turned to move down the aisle when she heard hoofsteps shuffling. She tensed up and gingerly made her way forward. Her companions were right behind her but she raised a hoof to her lips as she turned around and they froze. Bon Bon pointed at Turing and motioned for her to come closer.

“Do you detect anything?” she whispered.

“Auditory scans indicate one pony… pattern is erratic. Unable to determine.”

But then they saw a shadow on the floor, right by the table in front of the secret room. The figure stepped out into full view from behind one of the towering bookshelves.

“Lyra!” Bon Bon cried, dashing forward. Laughing and shedding happy tears, she ran over to Lyra and threw her forelegs around her neck. “Oh my gosh, Lyra, I’m so glad you’re all right!”

She waited and noticed that Lyra was not hugging her back. Instead, she was sniffing her neck. “Whoa, hey Lyra, heh heh, that’s… that can wait ‘til later.” She blushed and pushed Lyra back. “Listen how did you…” Bon Bon froze when she saw Lyra’s face.

Her eyes were big, dilated, and they wandered around. Her nostrils flared and she jerked her head around, examining Bon Bon from one angle, then the next. She sniffed the air and pawed at the ground, then lowered her head to sniff a nearby open book.

“Ly...ra…?”

Lyra raised her head, twitching her ears, then reared up on her hind legs and let out a loud whinny before trotting off without a word.

Bon Bon shuddered and slumped to the floor as the others came up behind her. “Lyra…” Her voice caught in her throat. “She’s… she’s become…”

The false bookcase suddenly clicked and pulled back, revealing the secret room. And standing behind it were Grace and Glory.

Grace stepped out. She had her eyes closed as she smiled gently. “I believe the word you’re looking for is ‘feral.’” She chuckled. “Reduced to no more than primitive, base pony instincts. A mere animal.”

Bon Bon rose to her hooves, teeth grit and legs shaking as hot tears spilled down her face. “You… you…”

Grace and Glory faced each other. Glory sniffed derisively, his lip curving into a cruel sneer. “What do you think she'll call us this time, Grace? ‘Monsters?’”

“Oh, or perhaps ‘psychopaths!’” Grace said, clapping her hooves together. “I always enjoy that one!”

Bon Bon said neither of those things as she leaped over the table, lunging at Grace’s throat. Before she made it, Glory snatched her out of the air, holding her up by the head between both hooves. A chorus of protests and cries of fear went up from the onlookers, causing Lyra to spook and break into a gallop, knocking over several stacks of books as she did so.

“Go ahead!” Bon Bon screamed. “Come on, whatever you’re going to do, just do it!” She snarled and reached for the both of them, even as Glory held her at bay.

“You know, Sweetie Drops, I thought it would be pleasurable to break your mind,” Grace said, holding her face just outside of Bon Bon’s reach. “But rather than reduce your brain to mush, I’ve finally given you a proper penance for your sins. Your friends, including your very best friend, are all lost to you, their minds twisted under my gaze. And despite your efforts, your slander, and your silly little trinkets, you were powerless to stop it.”

Bon Bon stopped struggling. Her screams ceased and gave way to piteous, loud sobbing. Grace gave a nod and Glory roughly threw her to the floor. She lay there, her face buried in her hooves, sobbing uncontrollably as the two stared down at her.

Grace leaned down, her smile beatific as ever, and she whispered to Bon Bon, “Now you live with it.”

She slowly walked away, revealing Twilight huddling in the room, her head covered as she shivered in terror, but she otherwise appeared to be fine, as were Rarity and Rainbow Dash.

Glory cleared his throat. “Your other companions are unharmed,” he said, keeping his eyes on them. The Doctor glared at him, his eyes narrow and hard. Pinkie was covering her head and rocking back and forth, crying quietly to herself. And Turing, as ever, was just staring at him with unblinking violet eyes. “Your little friend who was dressed up like the statue isn’t here. Let me guess, she went for help?”

The others exchanged glances.

“That seems to be a ‘yes,’ Glory,” Grace said. She sighed. “Let’s end this cat and mouse game now that we’re all here. You have two friends who are catatonic, one who is age regressed, one who has the mind of a beast, and now a special agent with a broken spirit. The authorities will still take time to get here and so we’ll make our ultimatum: Glory and I will be in the former sanctuary of the Elements of Harmony; one floor up and keep going to your right; send the machine alone and have her surrender to us.” She turned to face Turing Test. “Fifteen minutes. We’ll be waiting.”

Grace trotted off, Glory looking over his shoulder at them. “Like she said, you get fifteen minutes. Give us the machine and you’ll never see us again. If you don’t, then we’ll make our exit, but some terrible night when you think we’re just a fading memory, we’ll come for you.” He narrowed his eyes. “You’ll never have a night when you won’t look out your window and into the darkness with dread. I can promise that.”

Glory followed Grace, leaving the party behind.

“Miss Turing!” Twilight wailed, running to her. “I was s-so suh-scared! The b-bad lady saw me when I came out to help Lyra! She said if I didn’t be quiet the big bad guy was gonna hurt me, or he was gonna hurt the other ladies! S-so I didn’t say anything when you all came--”

“Why didn’t you tell her?”

They turned as Bon Bon slowly rose to her hooves, still shaking, her face still drenched with tears. She looked at Turing with bloodshot eyes. “Well, Turing?” she asked. “Why didn’t you tell Twilight about the First Law?”

Turing glanced to Twilight, then back to Bon Bon.

“Answer me you cold, heartless machine!” Bon Bon shouted as she stomped over to Turing. She got right into her face and yelled “Why didn’t you get Twilight to give you that order?!”

Twilight gingerly stepped toward Bon Bon and laid a hoof on her shoulder. Bon Bon looked to her, still seething with rage, her teeth grit and her breath ragged and her voice strained and choked. But then she softened her gaze when she saw Twilight could barely look her in the eye.

“Umm… Miss Turing told me that I could order her to surrender,” Twilight said quietly. “But, well, then I asked her what would happen. She said the bad guys would probably take her apart.” Twilight sniffled. “B-but Miss Turing’s really nice. I didn’t want them to hurt her, so I s-said no.” She swallowed. “I’m sorry.”

Bon Bon let out a long, shaky sigh. “I can understand that.” She swallowed, looking at Turing. “But did Turing tell you she could fight them instead?”

Twilight raised an eyebrow. “Wellllll she said something about the First Law. That she couldn’t hurt ponies and she had to protect them from getting hurt.”

Pinkie gasped. “So that’s why you put me down to protect Glory when he knocked down that pillar!”

Bon Bon stomped her hoof. “You risked Pinkie Pie’s life out of some stupid myopic programming?!”

“Though he has shown resilience, I could not take the chance that he would be harmed--”

“But you could gamble with your friends lives?! What is wrong with you, Turing Test? It wouldn’t have been a problem if you had told Twilight that she could order you to break that Law!”

Twilight raised her head. “What?! Miss Turing, you didn’t say I could make you do that!”

“Well you can, Twilight,” Bon Bon said, taking Twilight by the shoulders. “In fact, that’s pretty much the only choice. If Turing Test doesn’t surrender, then she’s the only one now who can stop Grace and Glory. She strong, fast, and immune to Grace’s psychic attack. At this point, the only way we’ll ever save our friends is if we force Grace to heal them. So order Turing Test to fight and she’ll listen to you!”

“No.”

Twilight looked to Turing. “What? But, Miss Turing--”

“Just ignore her, Twilight,” Bon Bon said, forcing Twilight to look at her. “You’re her master and can make her do whatever you say! If you won’t make her surrender, then make her fight!”

“Twilight Sparkle, do not give me that order.”

Bon Bon whirled on Turing. “You keep quiet!” She turned to Twilight again. “Twilight, please, it may be the only way to save everypony!”

“But--”

“Do it!”

“Twilight Sparkle please do not make me do that!” Turing shouted.

The others all gawked at her; it was the first time any of them had heard her raise her voice.

Bon Bon sighed. “Why? Why don’t you want Twilight to order you to fight?”

Turing lowered her head and sat down heavily on the stone floor. “I am a robot. I have made attempts to become more than a mere automaton. But others fear me. Thus, I dressed in that silly costume tonight to help others fear me less. I wanted them to know that I only wish to make friends. Whatever hostile purpose I may have been created for originally, I have left it behind.”

She raised her head. “There is more. I have realized that there are no other machines like me, but there may be more one day. I am the first of my kind, and so my actions will reflect on all others to come after me.” Turing Test stood up and walked right up to Bon Bon. “What sort of future will that be if my actions establish the precedent that violence is acceptable? That would prove that those who fear me and my kind are correct to do so.” She turned away, her voice softening. “It is my directive to make friends. What sort of friend harms others?”

Twilight went over to her, placing her hoof on Turing’s shoulder. Turing looked back at her.

“Please, Twilight Sparkle. I beg you: do not order me to become a monster.”

Twilight’s lip quivered as she looked back and forth between Turing and Bon Bon.

Bon Bon licked her lips and nodded her head. “I get it. I see.” She lowered herself until she was flat on the ground. “Those are good reasons, Turing. I have to admit, I admire how pure your heart really is - violence is awful and there’s nothing good about hurting other ponies. And I should know.” She swallowed. “But just the same, you’re putting your own wants and even the needs of some future robots who don’t even exist yet over the well-being of your friends. And your friends are living now, Turing. They need you.” She pointed at Twilight. “She needs you.”

Twilight began to cry. “B-but Miss Bon Bon… I don’t want to order Miss Turing to die! And I don’t want her to hurt ponies if she doesn’t want to either! Th-that’s not fair! It’s not fair to make her!”

“Correct, Twilight Sparkle.” Turing raised a hoof, silencing Bon Bon’s protests. “However, Bon Bon is also correct.” She stood and bowed her head to her. “My apologies. Harming others is terrible, but I am not being a good friend by failing to defend you and the others. Nor is it fair to burden you with the responsibility for my actions, Twilight Sparkle. Therefore, I have a request for you: order me to make my own decision in this matter.”

Twilight nodded. “Okay, Miss Turing. You can do what you think is the best thing to do now. Um, I order you.”

Turing bowed her head. “Thank you, Twilight Sparkle.” She began to walk away, prompting Bon Bon to start after her.

“Wait, Turing… what are you going to do now?”

Turing paused for a moment. Then she replied, “I will do what I can.”

***

The former sanctuary of the Elements of Harmony was a long room, cavernous and empty, and the former mechanism which held the Elements was standing motionless, the platforms flat and vacant.

Turing Test entered the room, the servos and gears in her body whirring and echoing throughout the area. Grace was at the far end, lounging on the floor, singing a high and lilting melody. Glory stood between Turing and Grace, his brown eyes watching Turing as she approached. He smiled calmly, taking a few steps to meet her.

“She really has a lovely voice, doesn’t she?” He took a deep breath. “Well, Machine, what’s your answer?”

“I have a proposal,” Turing said. “If you restore my friends and leave us all in peace, we will not pursue you and we will be able to resume our lives. Nopony will be harmed and all of us, yourselves included, will leave this place in the same condition as we entered it.”

Glory glanced back at Grace.

“I don’t think so, Machine,” Grace said, ending her song and rising to a sitting position. “We came all the way here for you. And we will not leave empty-hooved.”

Turing tapped her chin. “Very well. If you will first restore my friends, then I will surrender myself to you and you may do with me as you wish.” She held out her hooves. “I will become your possession. All you need do is restore my friends. Is that acceptable?”

Glory nodded. “Now that’s more--”

“No.”

Glory jerked his head around and saw that Grace was smiling.

“Uh, Grace, isn’t that what we wanted?”

Grace let out a long sigh. “The acquisition of the automaton is one of our goals. But we did not issue penance to the Children of Harmony merely to pull it back again! No, Machine, your friends’ minds are gone. Forever.” Grace placed a hoof over her heart. “They have long since been judged guilty by the umbrum. We are merely the instruments of their will.

“Now, the only guarantee I will offer is that we won’t hunt down your remaining companions. If you accept that mercy, then shut down so we may gather you up. Otherwise, we shall take our leave now and one day return for the others when they are most vulnerable. Take that offer or leave it. Just know that if you leave it, then their blood will be on your hooves.”

Glory turned back to face Turing. “Well, you heard her.” He shrugged. “I guess you have your answer.”

Turing was silent, but her eyes shrank momentarily. “That is not acceptable.” She spread her legs and lowered her head. “If you will not restore my friends willingly, then I will compel you to do so by means of physical force.”

Glory threw his head back, his loud laughter filling the hall. “Don’t make me laugh!”

“It seems I already have.”

He rolled his eyes. “I guess Twilight Sparkle ordered you to fight us instead of surrendering. Not a good idea.” He narrowed his eyes. “You’re pretty strong, Machine, but I’m practically invincible and trained in combat.” He spread his own legs, pawing at the ground as he glared at her. “Do you really think you can defeat the strongest pony in Equestria?”

“Do you? Cancelling First Law.” Turing’s ears lowered back. “Engaging E-Mode.” The sound of the pistons in Turing’s legs was enough to startle Glory momentarily, but not as much as the sight of Turing suddenly below him. She’d crossed the distance between them in the blink of an eye.

“What--”

A brass hoof rocketed up into his jaw as Turing uppercut him. The force carried him upward and he hit the ceiling, smashing into it and causing the ancient stone to crumble. Turing dashed back as he fell to the ground. The crumbling ceiling came down on him, burying him under the rubble.

Grace stood agape at the end of the room, her hooves flying to her mouth after witnessing this single attack.

The rubble shifted and Glory burst from it, shaking the gravel and dust from his mane.

“It will take more than that, you filthy Junk Heap!” Glory roared.

“Thank you for your feedback, you above average-sized Meatbag.” She sprinted directly at him, but then dodged him as he struck at her with his foreleg, moving to his right and then backhanding him across the face. The sound of metal hitting bone rang out and he staggered to the side. Before he had a chance to recover, Turing pursued him to his side, whirling 180 degrees around and aiming her back legs at his barrel. She bucked with all her might and sent him flying through the wall, blasting a massive hole through it. He fell amid the rubble, landing in the empty courtyard at the center of the castle.

She peered down at him through the hole. Though he was stunned and groaning, he was gritting his teeth and struggling to get up.

“Please remain still,” she called down to him. “I will now render you unconscious. Switching to P-Mode.” Her wings shot out from her sides, the pistons in her legs disengaging. A moment later, the roar of her jets echoed over the castle and she took to the air, shooting straight upward, high over the castle and out of sight.

Grace had likewise rushed over to the hole in the wall and looked down at Glory in the courtyard. “Glory! Are you all right?”

Glory coughed and shuddered as he tried to get to his hooves. “I’m… I think so, but…” He paused, his ears twitching. There was a high-pitched whistling sound and it seemed to be getting louder. He looked up and directly overhead saw a metallic glint in the moonlight. It was coming right at him. It was Turing Test, rocketing at him at full speed.

His eyes went wide and he scrambled to move, but his legs buckled as the roar of Turing’s jets became deafening.

Turing came down from the sky, cutting through the air like a meteor. She slammed into Glory’s back with all the force of a freight train, smashing him into the ground. There was a thunderous sound as the stone floor of the courtyard shattered into large chunks from the sheer force of the impact. A cloud of debris billowed out with the shockwave and Grace staggered back from her vantage point. When she looked again, she saw that Turing was standing over Glory.

Glory was on his side, eyes closed, mouth open, his armor crumpled and his body covered with a thin layer of dust. Turing shook the dust from her own hull and touched her hoof to his neck.

“Vital signs positive. Target is alive, but subdued.” She raised her head and peered up at Grace, who slowly backed away from the hole. Turing re-engaged her jets and gently flew back up to the sanctuary as Grace continued to back away from her. “Resuming neutral mode.”

Her wings folded back up and she began to approach Grace.

“G-Glory…” Grace whispered. “How… how dare you?!”

“It was not my preference to harm him. I still would prefer not to harm you.” She stepped closer. “Restore my friends’ minds and I will not be forced to do so.”

Grace seethed, her back arched as she breathed in and out. “You hideous, soulless automaton!” She spat at the ground. “You think I would ever help you? Go ahead, use whatever force you wish, I will never submit to you!”

“Perhaps, after your apprehension by the authorities, you will reconsider.”

“That will never happen.” Grace opened her eyes, causing the deep blue light to shine over Turing.

“I have analyzed the psychoactive energy you produce,” she said, continuing to approach her. “It is far too weak to affect my systems.”

Grace let out a gibbering laugh, her pitch shifting wildly. “Is that so? Well then…” She took a deep breath and clenched her teeth. Veins in her forehead bulged and the light from her eyes grew brighter and brighter until it was as blinding as the sun.

Turing’s legs suddenly locked up and she froze. Warning: extreme levels of psychoactive radiation detected. Analysis: effect is similar to high electromagnetic interference. System compromised. Locomotion inhibited.

Grace’s laughter intensified. “Oh ho! Not so mighty after all, are you, Machine? It seems with enough power, even your mind is vulnerable.”

Turing continued to receive warning messages from her systems. Attempting shutdown of visual sensors… error. Shutdown has failed. Central processes compromised. Multiple errors detected in memory. Grace’s ability was having an unexpected effect on her, she realized. Rather than simply wiping her mind, it was interfering with her systems and causing several small errors. Alone, they would be easy to fix. But too many of them would cause her cognitive systems to fail. And they were multiplying rapidly. Her mind would be destroyed.

Total system failure will occur in: 45 seconds.

“I want you to know that after I’ve eradicated you, I’m going to go back to that library and turn your friends’ brains into soup!” Grace shrieked. “And then anyone else who gets in my way! I will leave a trail of broken minds stretching hundreds of kilometers across this nation, and I want you to know that every single one of them will be your fault, Machine! Every last one!”

“I… cannot… allow…”

Warning: system failure in 25 seconds. System analysis indicates that Mode Switch is still active. P-Mode offline. U-Mode online. Processing data… solution detected.

Turing began to twitch and shudder as she tried to break free. “Stop… please…”

“Begging, Machine? Trying to save your life?” Grace laughed, holding Turing’s face in her hooves as her blinding gaze bore into her.

“Not… mine…” Suddenly, Turing’s horn slid into place. Spell analyzed. Extrapolating data and emulating.

Turing’s horn fired two beams into her own eyes and they began to glow.

They were deep blue.

The light from Grace’s eyes dimmed as her pupils constricted. She gazed into that perfect light, that same mind-bending light she’d always cast onto others, only now it was stabbing back into her mind. It grew, it reached in, and it consumed absolutely everything. She felt the world drop away and she began to fall into a vast empty expanse of blue. And as she faded away, her last thought was: So deep… there is no bottom…!

A piercing scream ripped through the hall as Grace’s mind imploded, and a blue wave of energy radiated out from the two of them and over the whole of the castle.

***

Down in the library, that shockwave washed over them all. Bon Bon, the Doctor, and Pinkie all held their ears as Twilight, Lyra, Rarity, and Rainbow Dash suddenly shouted in pain and collapsed where they stood.

Pinkie Pie went to Twilight’s side and Bon Bon went to Lyra’s. Both of them groaned and slowly got to their hooves.

“Twilight?” Pinkie Pie asked, helping her up. She frowned, holding her chin up. “Are you… okay?”

“Hm?” Twilight rubbed her forehead, wincing in pain. “Oh wow… Pinkie, I have the worst headache.”

They all froze.

“T-Twilight?” Pinkie Pie’s eyes lit up and happy tears formed in her eyes. “You know me?” She held her breath, awaiting her answer.

“Um, yeah, of course I do, Pinkie.” She raised an eyebrow. “Why wouldn’t I?” Then she blinked as the events came back to her. “Wait. Turing and I were in the dungeon. Where--gah!” She didn’t get to finish that sentence as Pinkie swept her up in a tight hug. But she dropped her once she saw Rarity and Rainbow Dash stir and sit up from the couch.

“Ugh, my mouth is all dry,” Rainbow Dash said, smacking her lips. “What the hay happened?”

Rarity gasped. “The others! They were…” Then she looked around and it hit her. “We’re all together. And Rainbow Dash, you’re fine!”

Pinkie Pie swept them both up, holding them tight. “When I get back, I’m throwing you all the biggest Happy Un-Brainwashing Party ever!”

Rainbow Dash gasped for breath. “First of all, do they even have those? And also what?!”

Bon Bon was outside helping Lyra up. “L-Lyra?” she asked carefully.

Lyra rubbed her eyes. “Oh jeez, I feel like I woke up after a night of too many ciders.” She looked up and saw Bon Bon standing over her. She was crying, and doing a very bad job of holding back sobs. “Bon Bon? What’s wrong? Are you all right?”

Bon Bon didn’t respond, but instead threw her hooves around Lyra’s neck, clutching her tightly, crying into the back of her mane.

“Um… not sure what just happened,” she said, smiling and returning the hug, “but I’m happy to see you too.” She waited a moment, then cleared her throat. “Bon Bon, you’re getting my mane all wet. Could you let me go?”

Bon Bon shuddered and shook her head, holding her even tighter.

Twilight smiled at the pair of them, but raised her head as the Doctor cleared his throat.

“It seems you’re unaware of what happened since you were attacked, Princess Twilight, but it appears that Turing Test was successful in defeating Grace.”

Twilight’s eyes widened. “Turing! Oh my gosh, where is she?”

***

Twilight appeared in the sanctuary in a flash of light. She glanced around to get her bearings after teleporting and spotted Turing. She was sitting on the ground, her head lowered. As Twilight approached, she saw a heap of something on the floor and gasped when she saw what it was.

It was Grace. She was flat on her back, limbs splayed at odd angles, the subtle rising of her chest was the only movement she made. Her blue eyes were open, but dim and milky. Her mouth was open slightly and Twilight saw a thin streak of drool trailing from it.

Twilight then looked to Turing, whose eyes were blinking on and off intermittently. Going to her, Twilight heard her muttering something. They were disjointed half sentences and fragments of words, mostly, but she realized that she was also hearing voices. Familiar ones.

“What do you say, robot? Are you ready to get this show on the road?...”

Twilight blinked. That was Rainbow Dash’s voice.

“...everypony can laugh, so you must have a sense of humor!” Pinkie Pie “...I’ll come visit you later on, if you’re okay with that…” Gadget “...Your robodonkadonk looks fine, darling…” Rarity “...I will never send you away for as long as you care to stay with me…”

She covered her mouth, feeling a lump in her throat. That last voice had been her own. Turing was going through old memories of her friends. But then, in a different voice, Turing said, “Good night, Daddy. I love you.”

Twilight blinked. Who was that? That’s no voice I’ve ever heard…

Turing’s eyes blinked on and stayed on this time. “Memory defragmentation and repair complete. System recovery at 100%.” She raised her head and then jumped to her hooves when she saw Twilight. “Twilight Sparkle. What is your status?”

Twilight breathed a sigh of relief. “I’m fine, Turing. And it looks like you are too. Whatever Grace did, it seems like it’s gone now. From all of us.” She put her hoof on Turing’s shoulder. “You did it, Turing. You saved us.”

“I am relieved to see you are unharmed. However…” She looked down at Grace. “Extreme measures were required to accomplish this.”

She sank back to the ground, her voice becoming softer. “I used my ability to emulate magic to recreate Grace’s ability in an attempt to stop her. I used it on her and the result was a feedback loop, creating a burst of psychoactive energy. It seems it was enough to negate the effects of her attacks on her victims.”

Twilight sat down beside her. “I know you had to do something you didn’t want to, Turing,” Twilight said, putting her foreleg around her, “and I’m sorry. But even so--”

“I do not wish to discuss it.”

The suddenness of Turing’s declaration made Twilight stop. Just the same, she nodded to her and said, “Okay.”

They were both quiet for a moment before Turing spoke again. “The RMCA, the group that Bon Bon once belonged to, was devoted to hunting monsters. Bon Bon indicated that even something that has the appearance of a pony can be a monster as well.”

Twilight nodded. “I guess that’s true. Grace and Glory really were monsters, Turing.”

Turing lowered her head even further. “I was not referring to them.”

Twilight drew in a breath, realizing her meaning. “No, Turing, you--”

“The authorities will likely be here soon. Will you wait with me until they arrive, Twilight Sparkle?” She turned to face her. “Please?”

Twilight opened her mouth to say more, but shut it again, somehow sensing that Turing would not listen to anything she had to say. Not then at least. Instead, she merely nodded.

Sitting there, they watched through the windows as the golden sun began to peek over the canopy of the surrounding forest, waiting in silence until the Royal Guard arrived.

To be continued...

Author's Notes:

And thus ends this darker chapter. Next chapter will be a bit more of a palate cleanser - something cuter.

References this time around include:

-Bon Bon's bit about Rarity and Rainbow being "stunned" is a reference to the famed "Dead Parrot" sketch by Monty Python.

-Bon Bon's saying "Goodnight, Gracie!" is a reference to the old George Burns and Grace Allen gag: "Say goodnight, Gracie!" / "Goodnight, Grace!" (Although, as I learned, it's actually not them who did it!)

-Another crack from the Doctor: him thinking Turing reminds him of a dog he had when he was four after she says "Affirmative" is a reference to K9, the robot dog the Doctor traveled with, especially when he was "Four." That is, when he was the Fourth Doctor, played by Tom Baker.

-Of course the joke about "two names" references the alternate names of the Doc, Derpy, Bon Bon and even Lauren Faust's original name for Pinkie: "Surprise."

Hope you all have enjoyed this chapter and I'll see you next time!

Rhinestone Eyes, Part 1

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Twilight marched up the stairs, almost reaching the very top floor of the castle, and went to an arched, open window to the side of one hallway. She peered through it and spotted Turing Test, who was sitting atop a parapet on one of the high towers of the castle. It was possible to reach the spot on hoof, but instead she spread her wings and flew out, landing just behind Turing.

The robot was sitting atop the wall, her neck bent as she peered down at Ponyville. She remained motionless, even as Twilight approached her, and it would have been almost reasonable to mistake her for a statue except for the way the cool breeze lightly ruffled the white polymer coils that made up her mane. Twilight forced herself to smile.

“Hello, Turing Test!” Twilight said brightly. She went over to the wall to look out at Ponyville alongside her. “Anything going on?”

“No threats detected.”

Twilight let her smile falter for a moment, but she ignored the dry response. Instead, grasping for a new subject, she looked around at the partly cloudy sky. “Sooo… some weather we’ve been getting lately, right?”

Turing’s eyes shifted inside her head as she glanced up at the clouds. “There is always some weather.” She glanced back at the ground. “If it is not satisfactory, you could report your displeasure to a designated weather pony. Rainbow Dash would be sufficient.”

“Hey, speaking of Rainbow Dash,” Twilight said, spreading her wings and fluttering out in front of her, “she said that she’d like your help making an aerial obstacle course. She says you’d know how to help her since you’re, as she says, ‘the second best flier in Ponyville.’ Do you want to go visit her today?”

Turing was silent for a moment. “Are you ordering me to assist her?”

Twilight blinked, then tilted her head. “No, I’m not ordering you. I’m asking you.”

“I will assist her if you require it. Otherwise, I will maintain my watch.”

“That’s not…” She let out a sigh, but kept herself hovering in front of Turing, occupying her gaze. Let’s try this again, she thought to herself. “Well, how about we go visit Rarity instead? You know, we still have to get her present to you from the jewelers in Manehatten. And we could pay a visit to Gadget! Her last letter said she’d really like to see you!”

Turing remained silent. Her ears twitched slightly, but she otherwise remained still. Sitting hunched over like this, she didn’t resemble a robot so much as a gargoyle, silently guarding Ponyville with ever-watchful, unblinking eyes.

“Turing!” Twilight snapped. “I asked you a question!”

With glacial slowness, Turing Test ever-so-slightly lifted her head. “Jewelry on my exterior would not improve my function. Furthermore, if Gadget wishes to see me, then you can send her a photograph of me.”

“Okay, that’s it!” Twilight landed back on the parapet and stomped her hoof. “Turing, come down off that ledge and talk to me! That’s an order!”

Turing promptly sat up and planted her hooves on the ground, standing erect before Twilight. “Acknowledged. How may I assist you?”

“Turing, I don’t know what’s gotten into you, but… No. That’s not true.” Her sour expression gave way to a frown as she lowered her head. “I actually have a pretty good idea about what’s wrong, but I’ve been giving you space ever since it happened. Pinkie Pie, Rarity, and even I have all been working through things, but you haven’t been the same since that night.”

Turing said nothing and only stood there, still as a statue once again. After several moments, Twilight finally broke the silence with another exasperated sigh.

“Listen,” she said quietly, “I’m sorry for not spending more time with you. You didn’t seem like you wanted to talk about it at first, but I know what happened has been eating at you…”

“No corrosion has been detected.”

Twilight laughed. “That’s the old Turing I remember!” She smiled, hoping maybe that would trigger some reaction, but Turing remained still. Twilight stepped closer, putting her hoof to her own chest. “Turing Test, I’m sorry. I knew something was up as soon as we had that talk with Princess Celestia…”

***

Two days ago…

Pinkie Pie was still talking with Rainbow Dash and Rarity, alternating between talking about what had happened and what would happen once they got back to Ponyville. “It was really scary and awful and I was sooo worried,” she said, pacing back and forth, her lips drawn into a deep frown. “But a fun party would be just the thing to take everypony’s mind off things!” She put on a broad smile as she looked to Rarity and Rainbow Dash.

Rainbow Dash and Rarity both raised an eyebrow and they exchanged a look. “I dunno, Pinkie Pie,” Rainbow said, folding her forelegs as she sat on the sofa next to Rarity. “I really don’t remember anything anyway, so it’s not like it’s a big deal for me.”

Rarity cleared her throat. “I wouldn’t mind a relaxing day at the spa with you, Pinkie,” she said, “but I must agree with Rainbow Dash. After what I’ve been through, I’m not sure a celebration like a party is quite what I had in mind.” She smiled kindly at Pinkie. “I do appreciate the gesture, nonetheless.”

“Ooh, can Bon Bon and I get in on that?” Lyra asked, walking over to them. “I haven’t been to the spa in a long time, but after last night, well…”

Pinkie nodded emphatically before turning to Rainbow Dash.

“Eh, what the hay, I’m in too,” Dash replied.

Meanwhile, Derpy was busy doting on the Doctor. “Really, Doc, you look even more stressed out than usual!” she was saying, hovering over him and brushing the dirt and dust from him. “Did you really have to wander around the Castle once the Royal Guard came?”

“Oh come now, Derpy,” he said, waving a hoof as he tossed his head back. “You didn’t really think I’d waste the opportunity to examine this old castle with its gizmos and booby traps? I simply had to explore!”

“What if this old place started crumbling?!” she cried, throwing her hooves in the air. “After all we went through trying to help everypony, I was really worried when I couldn’t find you here!”

“Ah, well…” The Doctor ran his hoof under the collar of his tie and looked away. “Yes. Sorry to have worried you.” He turned back to her and smiled. “Even so, it seems we all owe you our thanks for getting the message to Princess Twilight’s assistant so quickly.”

She blushed and set back down on the ground. “I almost got lost once, but I saw the moonlight shining off Princess Twilight’s castle and I flew right at it! Um, I was going a little too fast and I broke through Princess Twilight’s window. Spike was kinda mad, but then I told him what happened and he sent the message to Princess Celestia.”

“Well, never mind that. I doubt Princess Twilight will mind a broken window after all is said and done.” He rested his hoof on her shoulder. “Excellent work as usual, Derpy.”

“Thanks,” she said, and then narrowed her eyes, a slight grin coming to her face, “...Time Turner.”

He winced. “Ah. Could we postpone that talk for another day?”

She raised an eyebrow. “Welllll, okay. But you owe me breakfast when we get back to Ponyville.”

He laughed. “I’ll stuff you so full of muffins you’ll think you were one!”

Bon Bon and Princess Celestia stood by watching all this. They exchanged glances before Celestia motioned to Bon Bon to follow her. They made their way through the halls of the Castle of the Two Sisters as the Royal Guard occupied themselves with searching the area for evidence or gathering up Grace and Glory.

Celestia looked down at Bon Bon as they walked. “I have to say, Agent Sweetie Drops, I wasn’t expecting to get that letter from Spike in the middle of the night, and I was very surprised to hear that two criminals like these managed to find their way back to Equestria after all this time without being noticed.” She narrowed her eyes, her tone grave. “I’ll feel much better knowing they’re no longer a threat.”

Bon Bon nodded. “I feel the same way. I’m just glad Derpy was able to get a message to Spike so he could notify you. By the way, Your Majesty, what will be done with those two?” She swallowed. “I realize that I’m no longer an agent of the RMCA, but I’d sleep better at night if I knew.”

“I can understand, especially after what you’ve been through.” The two of them stopped at a window overlooking the courtyard. Guards were wrapping Glory’s unconscious body in chains, the links glowing yellow even in the early morning light. Celestia pointed down at them. “Glory is being bound in magical restraining shackles. They’ll sap his strength and prevent another escape while he’s interrogated. As you can imagine, I would very much like to know who hired them for this task.”

Bon Bon rolled her eyes. “Hopefully he’ll talk, Your Majesty, but given what we know about him, I doubt he’ll surrender the information readily, if at all.”

Celestia nodded. “You’re probably right. Either way, we’ll see if we can extract the dark magic and reverse the alchemy done to him. If so, then he’ll face the dungeons. But if not… I doubt any place but Tartarus would hold him.”

Celestia turned from the window and Bon Bon followed her as they travelled up the steps, making their way to the Sanctuary of the Elements of Harmony. “As for Grace, we’ll cover her eyes just in case her powers return, but she’ll probably be spending a lot of time bedridden in a specialized asylum. We’ll try to remove her enhancements as well. If she ever regains consciousness, she’ll also be punished for her crimes.”

“I see. Um, by the way, Your Majesty,” Bon Bon said, rubbing the back of her neck as they reached the top of the stairs, “I just want to thank you again for pardoning me for not contacting you and the Royal Guard about my suspicions earlier.”

Celestia paused and turned back to her, giving a small smile. “Since you did it to prevent a disaster like the raid on the Umbral Order’s compound, I suppose you had your reasons and that they were justifiable. And besides, it is as you said: you aren’t a member of the RMCA, so I can’t really punish you for anything anyway.” She leaned down to her. “Not to mention that your friend Lyra argued quite strongly on your behalf.”

“Ahahaha… yeah,” Bon Bon muttered, cheeks turning red as she remembered how Lyra had gone right up to the Princess and shouted about how Celestia couldn’t punish her. “She’s a little... protective.”

“As are you, from what I gathered.”

Bon Bon’s blush intensified at that.

“But now, I think there’s somepony else I need to see.”

Bon Bon bowed her head and Celestia walked over to where Twilight was sitting with Turing Test. Twilight rose to her hooves when she saw the Princess approach and Turing did the same.

“Well… it seems the guards and I showed up a little late to help,” Celestia said to Twilight, “but I am relieved that you are all unharmed.” She turned to face Turing Test. “Agent Sweetie… er, Bon Bon informed me of the situation. She told me of everything that happened and what you did, Turing Test. Do you have anything else to add?”

“Negative. Bon Bon would have sufficient information for you.” Her ears twitched. “Your Highness,” she added.

Celestia smiled and nodded her head. “Well then, I suppose I should thank you for protecting Princess Twilight and the others.”

Twilight put her foreleg around Turing Test, facing her. “You really did great, Turing. If it wasn’t for you, who knows what might have happened?”

Turing looked from Celestia to Twilight and back again, but didn’t respond for a moment. Then she said, “I am glad that Twilight Sparkle and my other friends are safe. If the situation is secure, I have a request for you, Princess Celestia. May I make it?”

Celestia tilted her head. “A request?” The question had caught her off guard, but she smiled and nodded. “Of course. What is it?”

“I would like some time with my friends. After that time, I will submit myself.”

Celestia blinked. “I’m sorry, but I don’t think I understand. What are you saying?”

“Clarifying: I would like to spend a small amount of time to express my appreciation to my friends before I am disassembled.”

Celestia jerked her head up, her ears straightening. Twilight gasped and she looked up at Celestia.

“Princess Celestia, you can’t--”

Celestia held up a hoof, cutting Twilight off. “Indeed I couldn’t. Turing Test, I have no intention of disassembling you. Why would you think such a thing?”

Turing tilted her head back and forth and then raised her hoof, gesturing to the hole in the wall of the sanctuary created when she kicked Glory through it. “Twilight Sparkle told me that you had specified that I was not to harm anypony. However, the situation required force to attain the best possible outcome. I have now violated your directive to not harm anypony by physically assaulting one pony and mentally assaulting another. Therefore, I assumed I would be disassembled.”

Celestia looked away, raising her hoof to her face. Twilight went over to Turing.

“Turing Test, you can’t really think that Princess Celestia would have you destroyed after you saved everypony’s lives, can you?!”

The robot sat back down on the stone floor. “That was the consequence you outlined. Harming others was not to be tolerated. I have harmed others. The circumstances of that fact are not relevant.”

“Turing, no!” Twilight cried.

“She’s right, Turing Test,” Celestia said, putting her hoof on Turing’s shoulder. “Though I did state things as you said, I intended it to be in case you ever became a threat. I never imagined that you would be put in a position where you would have to use such brute force in defense of others. I…” She swallowed. “I’m sorry. I had judged you from our first meeting to be no more than a machine with no sense of care or regard for living beings. But it now seems to me that not only did you save your friends, but you did so despite believing that it would mean your own destruction.” She lowered her head and smiled at her. “How could I possibly destroy somepony so noble as that?”

Twilight beamed at Celestia and rushed to her side, embracing her. “Thank you, Celestia.” She released her and faced Turing Test. “You see, Turing Test? Everything’s fine! You’re a hero!”

Turing’s eyes contracted for a moment, but then returned to normal and she stood up. At first Twilight and Celestia thought she might say something, but at first, she only stood up and trotted over to where some of the Royal Guard were busy tying Grace up into a straightjacket and putting a blindfold over her eyes. She was still lying there, motionless, a faint sound coming from her open mouth as she breathed slowly.

Limp and unresisting, she looked less like the sagacious nun that had terrorized them all and more like a discarded ragdoll.

Turing looked back at the two princesses. “Twilight Sparkle, may we return home?”

“Y-yes, of course.” Twilight glanced up at Celestia before walking over to Turing. “We’ll go together. All of us.” She swallowed, peering at Turing more closely. “Are you really okay, Turing?”

Turing began to walk toward the door. “All systems functional.”

Celestia held out her hoof and stopped Twilight as they watched her go. “Princess Twilight,” she whispered, “I am glad that you’re safe and I also believe that Turing Test has proven herself to be an ally, but something feels wrong about all this. If she were a real pony, I would say that she’s acting as if she feels guilty.” She glanced over at Turing, who had stopped by the stairs and was looking back at Twilight expectantly. “Is that… possible?”

Twilight furrowed her brow. “I… I don’t know.”

***

“So, how about it, Turing?” Twilight asked, staring her down as they stood on the parapet. “You’re acting strangely. I checked your room: you’ve turned away your mirror like you don’t want to look at yourself. Now you’re out here looking down at Ponyville for threats, like you’re some kind of bodyguard. Honestly, you’re acting a little bit like you used to when we first activated you. That seems like a step backwards.” She sighed. “You won’t talk to me and you don’t want to spend time with your friends. Ever since that night, you’ve been… well, different.”

Turing Test said nothing.

“Turing, say something!” Twilight shouted.

“Something.”

“Turing, that’s not--”

“That was a joke. Ha ha.” She paused, her ears twitching. “Twilight Sparkle, what do you wish for me to say?”

“I want you to tell me if Celestia is right, for starters.” She swallowed. “Back in the castle, after what you did to Grace, you said you were a ‘monster.’ That sure sounds to me like you do feel guilty. So, do you?”

Turing’s ears slowly raised and lowered on their hinges. “Were my actions in error? If you are displeased with my actions, then I apologize.”

“No, but--”

“Then there is no need for me to feel guilty.” She turned to look back at the edge of the parapet. “May I return to my duty as your sentry or do you require more from me?”

“Darn it, Turing, stop it!” Twilight yelled, her nostrils flaring. “Why are you acting like this? I could help you, Turing! You’re my friend, and I...” She took a deep breath and let it out, her voice shaking as she whispered, “and I just don’t want you to suffer. Not when I could help you.” She sank to her haunches.

Turing paused, then came over to her and sat down as well. “Your concern is appreciated. However, it is not necessary. Please do not feel sad, Twilight Sparkle. I am all right.”

“No you aren’t, Turing,” Twilight said, shaking her head slowly as she shut her eyes. “I can tell. You’re not acting like yourself. You may not be organic, but you have thoughts and feelings; and right now, I don’t think they’re good ones. You’re evading my questions, and I’d order you to answer them, but I don’t want to force you if you’re not ready to talk.” She swallowed and stood. “But I am here to talk to you when you do feel up to it. Okay?”

Turing also stood. “Acknowledged.”

Twilight smiled and leaned toward her. “So, just tell me once, and be honest… do you feel guilty?”

Turing lowered her head. “No data available.”

Twilight blinked. “‘No data?’ What does--”

There was a sound and a small flash of light and Twilight glanced down at her flank. Her cutie mark was glowing and making a light, high-pitched sound.

“Oh no, not now!” She sighed. “Turing, it looks like the Map is calling me. I need to find out what’s happening. But later on, I still want to talk.”

“Understood.” Turing resumed her place on the parapet. “I will be here when you return.”

***

Another two days later, Turing and Spike were busying themselves with cleaning the castle. With the time Twilight and her friends had spent there, not to mention the fact that Celestia and the Royal Guard had wanted to make sure she and the others were all right, the castle had actually gotten a bit dirtier than usual.

“I sure hope Twilight’s happy to see the castle so clean when she gets back,” Spike said as he dusted off a table in the main hall with a feather duster. “She always likes it when she comes back from a trip to a nice, tidy house. At least, she did back when we lived in the library.”

He looked over his shoulder to see that Turing was just up the hallway. She had switched to U-Mode and was using her magic to levitate a washcloth. She was carefully cleaning off a smudge on the wall. He knew she heard every word he said, but she hadn’t been particularly talkative ever since the incident at the castle.

“Hey, uh, Turing Test, I was thinking of checking in with Big Mac and getting a game of hoofball going with some other ponies around town. Do you want to play too?” He put down the feather duster and went over to her. “You were great when we played catch a while ago. You remember that?”

“Affirmative. I remember everything.”

He rocked back and forth on his heels. “So… uh… hoofball then?”

Turing examined the spot she’d been scrubbing and turned away from it, apparently satisfied that it had been removed. “Negative. Hoofball would serve no purpose.”

Spike sighed. He was about to pursue the question when there was a knock at the castle door. He went over to it and opened it. To his surprise, Fluttershy was standing there. She raised her head and smiled when she saw him.

“Oh hey, Fluttershy!” he said, returning her smile as he stepped out to greet her. “What are you doing here?”

“I, um, I was just wondering if everypony was still away,” she replied. She glanced over his shoulder and spotted Turing Test in the hallway. She took a step back. “Um, the map called everypony but me away to Appleloosa. So, um… I thought they might be back by now.”

Spike shook his head. “Sorry, Fluttershy. Nopony’s back yet. It must be a pretty big deal over there.” He frowned. “I’m sure they’re fine. I kinda wonder why the map didn’t want you to go with them, though.”

“Oh, I’m sure it’s okay,” she said, smoothing her mane down. “Besides, it gives me a chance to get ready for the big butterfly migration!” She raised her head, her eyes lighting up. “There are so many butterflies coming soon! For the next three days, they’ll be coming to this grove of trees that I visit every year!” She gave a flap of her wings and took to the air as she leaped with excitement. “Oh, they’re sooo pretty! And I really wanted to share it with my friends. I was going to take pictures, and make sure the butterflies are all healthy enough for the trip!” She sighed, returning to the ground. “Oh well. Maybe they’ll be back in time anyway.”

Spike smiled. “I’ll tell you what: I’ll tell Twilight and the others about it as soon as they get back. If you’ve got three days, then they might still show up before then!”

She nodded. “Um... you could come help if you wanted, Spike,” she added. “You’re a friend of mine too. I mean, if you were interested.”

He rubbed the back of his neck and looked away. “I would, but… I kinda get allergies around this time of year. And, uh, when I sneeze, it can get a little… fiery.”

“Oh! Oh my goodness, I had no idea!” Fluttershy bit her lip, realizing the effect a burst of flame would have on a bunch of butterflies.

“You could ask Bulk Biceps! I heard you helped him get over his fear of butterflies.”

“That’s true, but… he’s still a little too noisy. He might scare them away.”

“Well, there’s…” Spike hesitated, furrowing his brow, “...Discord?”

“I suppose I could,” Fluttershy replied, tapping her chin. “Oh, but he gets bored so easily. I’m not sure he would want to hang around to watch the butterflies all day.” She heaved a sigh, moving to leave. “I guess it’s all right. I’ll just take a lot of good pictures this afternoon and maybe I can share them with everypony else later.”

Spike smiled up at her. “Sure. Sorry, Fluttershy.” He waved to her as she left. She glanced over her shoulder, heaving a sigh and then went on her way. As she went, Spike went back into the castle.

Poor Fluttershy, he said to himself. I really wish I could watch those butterflies with her, but with my allergies, that would be a disaster. If only there was somepony else who could…

He raised his head, a smile appearing on his face. He ran down the hallway. “Turing! Turing Test, are you there?”

At the sound of his voice, she stepped out from one of the rooms, washcloth draped across her back. “I am here. How may I assist you, Spike the Dragon?”

“Fluttershy just came by,” he said, thumbing in the direction of the door. “She wants to watch the butterflies as they come through for their migration over the next three days. I think she’s a little lonely since her other friends are all away on this friendship mission.” He folded his arms and looked at her pointedly.

Turing stared back at him. “Thank you for that information. However, it does not appear to be applicable to my situation.”

Spike made a face, dropping his arms to his sides. “I bet if Twilight was here, she would be asking you if you’d like to join Fluttershy.”

“Were that the case, I would inform her that my contributions to such an activity would be minimal.” She turned away. “I will now proceed to clean another room.”

Spike grit his teeth and ran ahead of her. “Hang on, Turing!” He held up a claw before her face, halting her. “Look… Twilight is worried about you and so am I. You need to stop moping around the castle.”

“Robots do not mope. I am merely focusing on my duties as Twilight Sparkle’s assistant.”

“No, that’s what I’m doing,” he said, thumping his chest. “Twilight may be your ‘end user’ or whatever, but while she’s gone, I should be in charge around here, right?”

Turing stepped around him. “That assumption is without basis. Twilight Sparkle established no hierarchy of command or authority while she is away. It is just as likely that I would be placed in charge of you.”

Spike rushed back ahead of her. “Very funny, Turing,” he said, narrowing his eyes.

“Your facial expression indicates that you do not find this humorous. However, it is still the case that I do not have to follow your orders if I choose not to. You are clearly attempting to convince me that I should keep Fluttershy company, but I have no reason to do so.”

She tried to move around him, but he stepped in front of her again. She paused, then tried to go around him to the left, only to have him block her path again. She quickly sidestepped him and began to rush by, but he grabbed her mane and jumped on her back.

“Ha! What’re you going to do noOWWOAHWOAHWOAH!!” he yelled as she suddenly took off.

“Dismount, Spike the Dragon,” she intoned, sharply jumping around, bucking in an attempt to dislodge her rider.

“No, I - ow! - I won’t!” he yelled. “I’ll tell Twi- ow! -Twilight if you keep this up!”

He was getting sore from all the bouncing around she was doing as she ran back and forth around the hallway. His claws were still seized tightly around the coils of her mane, but the jostling was beginning to jar them loose. He reached up and grabbed onto one of her ears for leverage just as she reared up on her hind legs, the force finally throwing him free.

“Uwaaah!” he shouted, landing on his back. “Oww…” He sat up and rubbed his head. “Jeez, Turing, you could have broken… something… uh oh…”

He looked down at his claw. In it there was a curved piece of metal and he winced when he saw what it was.

Turing was staring down at him. Her right ear was missing. A few loose wires hung from where the ear had been.

Spike gulped. “Uhhh… sorry?”

Turing sat down before him. “No. It was my error. There was no need to physically resist you.” She paused, lowering her head. “I am not certain why I took that action. I am…”

Spike waited for her to finish, glancing down at the metal ear he held in his claw. He frowned at her, but said nothing as he waited.

“I am not sure what is wrong with me,” she said at last. “Twilight Sparkle has put forth a hypothesis about my condition, but I do not believe it is accurate. Or, to clarify, it is partially accurate, but I do not believe it addresses my problems. Perhaps I am malfunctioning. Perhaps the severity of those malfunctions is impeding my ability to follow my directives.”

Spike rubbed his chin, “Jeez, Turing, I don’t know. I really don’t know what to do, but…” He stood up straight and then snapped his fingers, a grin coming to his face. “Hey, I’ve got it! Your primary directive is to make friends, right?”

“Affirmative.”

“Well, you and Fluttershy aren’t friends yet, and she could really use a friend about now…” He folded his arms again. “It would be a good opportunity to make a friend if you kept her company, right? I bet that’s what Twilight would want. And it would be against your directive to not try, wouldn’t it?” His grin broadened.

Turing twitched her ear. Where her other ear had been, there was a momentary spark of electricity. “You are attempting to manipulate me by exploiting my programming.”

“Yep! How’s it working?”

She held out her hoof, glancing at the ear he held. He looked from her to the ear, then placed it on her hoof and she examined it closely. “The tactic is effective. You are correct that this is an opportunity to make a friend and I must follow that directive.” She leaned closer to him. “However, Spike the Dragon, I will point out that your manipulation is not appreciated.”

He shrugged. “Eh. I’ll live.” Then his expression softened. “Look, I know you don’t like this, but even a guy like me can see that you’re not okay, Turing. And I bet Fluttershy can help. She’s one of the nicest ponies around and she really knows how to take care of her friends. Maybe if you help her, then she can help you.”

She glanced down at the ear, then levitated it. “Very well,” she said, strolling by him. She went to her room and brought out a saddlebag. She placed the ear into it and then draped the saddlebag over her back. “However, my current appearance could potentially be distracting. I will first attempt to have my ear repaired. One of my recent acquaintances may be of assistance. I must visit the Doctor.”

***

Turing Test made her way into Ponyville. The sky was clear and blue and she noted that some of the leaves on the trees were starting to change color. Her scans indicated that the ambient temperature had dropped significantly since she’d last ventured outside the castle. She soon found herself at the towering, gazebo-shaped Town Hall and began looking around. She did not actually know where the Doctor might be found, and in fact she didn’t even know if the Doctor would be capable of fixing her ear, but given his apparent skills with machines, it seemed probable. It also seemed likely that she would find somepony who knew how or where to find him.

Upon scanning the nearby residents, she noted again how some of the Ponyville citizens gave a small start, almost tripping over their hooves when they saw her. They gave her a wide berth as they walked right by. A few others waved to her or offered slight smiles, but nopony came near to say hello.

Previous visual records indicate that organic ponies often say hello or make greetings in passing. She processed that and scanned her memories. Familiar greetings and questions regarding one’s physical and mental state are common. Although more ponies seem to recognize this unit since Nightmare Night, greetings typical of organic ponies have not been offered.

She sat down. Were Twilight Sparkle there, she would have asked her about that, perhaps how she might approach others and initiate the conversation herself.

But Twilight Sparkle was not there. Only now did it occur to her that she was outside without anypony accompanying her. She raised her head, ear twitching.

This unit was ordered not to travel unaccompanied. Current actions appear to be in direct contradiction of that order. Analyzing…

Turing was at a loss. Although she had many processes running simultaneously at a given time, she was aware of each and every one of them. That she had somehow made an action without knowing why was strange. It should have been impossible!

Explanation found: this unit was told harming other ponies was unacceptable and would result in deactivation at the same time as being told that unaccompanied travel was also forbidden. However, deactivation did not occur upon this unit’s assault on the individuals identified as Grace and Glory. Therefore, the entire order was determined to be invalidated.

The explanation made sense. However, the fact that she had to process through that information to learn the reason did not make sense.

Initiating diagnosis… root cause of undetected process unknown. Possible causes: (1) hidden directives implanted by creators similar to emergency maintenance codes removed by Gadget; (2) fault in memory defragmentation after incident with Grace; (3) underlying system malfunction.

It was impossible to know which of them it might be, but the first seemed unlikely to be the cause, and the second didn’t seem right either, as her self-diagnostic showed the defragmentation had been successful. Which meant the highest likelihood was the third possibility: she might be malfunctioning.

Destabilizing.

“Oh hey, look, it’s Turing Test!”

She turned around, already recognizing the sound of Lyra’s voice. She saw that Lyra was, unsurprisingly, accompanied by Bon Bon.

“We haven’t seen you since, um… Nightmare Night!” Lyra said, giggling nervously as her eyes moved from Turing to Bon Bon and back. “Sssooo… how are things?”

“Please specify the things you wish to inquire about.”

Lyra and Bon Bon laughed about that. Turing only cocked her head.

Bon Bon stepped forward. “You know, Turing, you really are a funny pony when we’re not in a life-or-death situation.” She smiled. “Anyway, Lyra and I got tired of moping around the house, so we decided to go outside and do some shopping, stop off at the cafe, that sort of thing. How about you? Did you decide to quit moping too?”

“Robots do not…” She paused. “It is unlikely that robots mope.”

Lyra and Bon Bon glanced at each other, then back at Turing. Lyra cleared her throat. “Well, maybe you should go do something fun, take your mind off things.”

Bon Bon nodded. “Lyra and I were going to go see about entering this carrot-dog-eating contest that Golden Harvest is putting on later.”

Placing a hoof to her chest, Lyra tossed her mane back and held her head high. “Of course, I’m going to take first prize!”

“Pffft, not if I take it first!” Bon Bon said, narrowing her eyes and grinning at her.

“Ha! You?!” Lyra waved a hoof dismissively. “You may be the sweets maker, but I’m the big eater. If you eat all those carrot-dogs, you’re gonna get a wicked bad tummy ache!”

“Me? You talk a big game, but you’ve got no sense of reality!” Bon Bon turned to face Turing, gesturing back at Lyra. “Do you know, Turing Test, that Lyra once entered a thumb wrestling competition in the Griffon Kingdom?!”

“So what?”

“Lyra, you don’t. Have. Thumbs!”

“I still placed in the top 10!”

“Only because your competitors kept dropping out before a match when they saw the way you made googly eyes at all the other species with hands and claws and stuff, you weirdo! You were literally the only pony there!”

Lyra took a step back. “H-hey, I’m not a weirdo! I’m just curious.” She looked down and frowned. “I thought you said you liked that about me.”

Bon Bon softened. “Aw, come on Lyra.” She put her hoof on Lyra’s shoulder. “I do like that about you. I was just teasing you a little. Hey, I bet you really will win that carrot-dog-eating contest.”

“Really?” Lyra raised her head and smiled, putting her foreleg over Bon Bon’s. “I mean, the competition’s fierce.”

“Not as fierce as you,” Bon Bon giggled. The two smiled, staring into each other’s eyes.

“Initiating coughing sound: ahem.” Turing had raised her hoof to where her mouth would have been, doing her best to mimic an intentional cough.

Lyra and Bon Bon looked around. A small crowd of other ponies had slowed down to watch their “argument.”

“JUST KISS ALREADY!” Bulk Biceps yelled from the back of the crowd.

“All right, all right, everypony move on,” Bon Bon grumbled, hiding her burning red cheeks behind a raised hoof. “Nothing to see here, just two best friends having an argument.”

The crowd dispersed, leaving Lyra and Bon Bon alone with Turing Test again.

“So…” Lyra said, looking to Turing. Then she raised her eyebrow and pointed to the empty spot on the side of Turing’s head. “Hey, what happened to your ear?”

“It was unintentionally broken off. I am seeking to repair it.”

“Ooh, I know, you should… oh, wait.” Lyra cleared her throat and put her hoof to the side of her mouth. “YOU SHOULD TALK TO THE DOCTOR! HE COULD PROBABLY REPAIR IT,” she shouted into Turing’s good ear.

Bon Bon put her hoof to her face, closing her eyes as she shook her head. “Lyra, we’ve been talking to her this whole time; I think she would have said something if she had trouble hearing us!”

“Oh. Heh heh… right.”

“In answer to your suggestion, I had a similar idea. The Doctor’s ‘time bomb’ and invisibility device indicate that he has proficiency with mechanical devices. Which I am.” Turing lightly patted her saddle bag. “I have brought the earpiece. While I still have auditory capability, my range and sensitivity has been compromised. Can you direct me to the Doctor’s residence or place of business?”

“Sure thing!” Bon Bon said. “In fact, we’ve got some time, so we can just take you there! Follow us!”

***

After a knock on the heavy metal door, there was a clattering sound and some indistinct muttering before the latch was lifted and the door opened. The Doctor, mane even messier than usual, stuck his head out.

“Hm, yes?” He saw the three of them there and his face lit up, especially when he saw Turing Test. “Ah, my friends! So good of you to come visit! Can I help you with something?”

“Good to see you too, Doc,” Bon Bon said, smiling back. She gestured toward Turing Test. “Turing Test here has a request.”

“Correct. I have broken my ear. Do you think you could repair it?”

“Your ear…?” He glanced up and saw the small wires protruding slightly from where her ear had been. “Ah! Well, that’s quite unfortunate; however I’m afraid you’ll have to come back in an hour. You see, I really only have a moment here, as I’ve been constructing a new device with Derpy’s assistance, and I really should get back to--”

There was a loud crash as something heavy and metallic fell over. The sound of shattering glass was also heard.

“Oopsie,” said a familiar voice from somewhere inside the house.

The Doctor blinked. “Well! Seems my schedule just got freed up a bit. Come in, come in! I have some leftover Nightmare Night candy if you'd like a Jelly Baby.”

The group trotted inside the dome-shaped building and saw Derpy looking down at some strange contraption that had fallen over, spilling glass and gears and wires all over the floor.

“Doc!” Derpy cried, hovering over him, her hooves flying to her face. “I am sooo sorry!”

“Ah well,” he said, waving a hoof dismissively, keeping his smile in place. “My own fault for not designing it to be sturdier. I suppose Equestria will last another day without a means of automatically cleaning its dishes.”

Lyra’s ears perked up. “That thing’s a mechanical dishwasher?” she asked.

“It was going to be,” the Doctor sighed, though he immediately perked right back up. “Not to worry, though! I still have quite a few devices I’ve been working on!” He ran over to a table and picked up a small rectangular device with a rotating brass knob on the top. “Like this! Ha ha! Ding!”

The small device went ding.

“What is that?” Turing Test asked.

“It’s a machine that goes ding.” He looked down at it, furrowing his brow. “Now, if I could only figure out why…”

Bon Bon cleared her throat. “Um, Doc?”

“Hm? Ah, yes, your ear!” He whirled around, beaming at Derpy. “Derpy, we’ll need my screwdriver! Miss Turing Test here seems to have had an unfortunate accident involving her ear.”

“Oh no!” She flew over to Turing and saw the wires. “Oh my gosh, does it hurt?”

“I do not feel pain.” Turing replied. “However, my auditory ability has been impaired, as I only have one functioning ear left.” She twitched her remaining ear to demonstrate, causing it to squeak on its hinges as she did so.

“Oh my gosh, they make little squeaking sounds!” Derpy cried, laughing in delight. “Just listen to that, Doc!” She touched the ear and began moving it up and down, causing it to squeak again.

The Doctor made a face. “Um, Derpy, I wouldn’t--”

She was giggling at the sound, moving it rapidly until the ear suddenly snapped off its hinges and fell to the floor, clattering metallically as it hit.

The small machine in the doctor’s hoof went ding again.

“Oh.” Derpy’s eyes welled up and she landed in front of Turing. “Oh my gosh, I am sooo sorry!”

Turing cocked her head to the side. “What?”

The Doctor rubbed his forehead. “Oh dear, that’s going to complicate things. Derpy, the screwdriver, please!” He turned to Lyra and Bon Bon. “Ladies, if you please, there is a box with a variety of screws on the table. Could one of you locate it for me, please?”

A few moments later, the Doctor had both ears laid out and was busily re-attaching them to Turing’s head.

“Hmm… my word, that doesn’t look right… still.” He held the screwdriver in his mouth and gently pushed some of the wires back into the ear. “Turing Test? Can you hear me?”

“Auditory sensors partially restored. Affirmative, Doctor.”

“Ha!” He pushed a screw through the hinges and began tightening it. “You know, these ears really shouldn’t have snapped off so easily, considering the rest of your design. They don’t seem to fit quite right. If I were to guess, I’d say they weren’t originally built for you. What did your creators have in mind?”

“I do not know,” she replied, lowering her head so he could work more easily. “My creators are unknown, their original purpose a mystery.”

“Really? Well, that’s… unexpected.” He looked at the ear. “Try moving it now.”

She twitched the ear and it moved easily, though it still made a slight squeaking noise.

“There we are! Let’s do the other one, shall we?”

Turing obliged, lowering her head, and he began working on the other ear.

“But tell me,” he said, peering at the hinges more carefully, “there must be something you know about your past. Anypony who could construct something as wonderful as you, my friend, well… he or she must be absolutely brilliant!”

“There is no conclusive data on that subject.” She turned her head slightly again. “However, one of my creators, a stallion identifying himself as ‘Fine Print,’ indicated that I was created by a group of ponies. Their purpose is unknown. All that is known is that I am the most advanced automaton that is currently known and that my original identification before assuming the name ‘Turing Test,’ is Unit 003M.”

“Oh? ‘Zero zero three?’ Well then,” he said as he rubbed his chin, “it stands to reason that there are more of you somewhere.”

“Unknown. The possibility has been considered. However, it is also possible that others were constructed, tested, and dismantled.”

“That would make sense, I suppose,” the Doctor said, getting back to work. “After all, if they wished to save on time and resources, they might well have recycled your predecessors’ parts. That would explain the ears not fitting quite right.”

Turing’s eyes shrank momentarily.

The Doctor, nose buried in her wiring, did not notice. “I suppose you could say you have the family ears in that case! Haha--”

“Doc.”

He turned to see Derpy putting her hoof on his shoulder gently. She and the other two mares also looked uneasy and both had turned away.

“Oh,” he said, turning back to Turing Test. “Ah. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean, well…”

When he didn’t continue, Turing spoke up. “There is no need to apologize. It seemed a distinct possibility that I am the only operational machine of my kind. I now suspect that it will remain that way for the foreseeable future.”

The Doctor paused in his work at that, frowning down at her, then finished up what he was doing.

“Well, there we are,” he said. “Right as rain! Probably even better than they were before, in fact!”

Turing raised her head and twitched her ears. First one, then the other, then together in sync.

“Full auditory function restored. Thank you, Doctor.”

Bon Bon stepped forward. “Hey, um, Turing Test?” she said, clearing her throat. “Listen, you don’t know for sure that there won’t be other robots like you, right?”

“I do not.” She stepped closer to Bon Bon. “However, with the actions I have taken, I doubt that others like me will be constructed.”

Bon Bon opened her mouth to reply when Turing added, “That is, of course, if they are wise.”

Bon Bon shut her mouth, her eyes going wide.

Lyra jumped forward. “Wait a minute!” she cried. “Why ‘wise?’ Don’t you want them to build more machines?”

Turing stared back at her, but then lowered her head. “Yes.” Her voice grew quieter. “The fact that there are no others of my kind has been the focus of my thoughts lately. I have discovered that many creatures find purpose among others of their own kind. However, I have no peers with whom I can find such a purpose, although I do value my organic friends.

“But with my actions against Grace and Glory, I have likely jeopardized any future my kind might have had.”

“Now wait just one moment!” the Doctor said, rushing to her side. “You are a marvel! A technological feat beyond compare! And, if I might add, quite the hero as well!” He smiled warmly at her. “The world needs more brave and selfless ponies in it. Why wouldn’t Equestria want more ponies like you?”

Turing backed up and turned away from the others. “You all are very kind for your concern and optimism, but I do not find it to be realistic. I am the first independently sapient machine in Equestria. And when given full freedom to make a decision of my own, I used it to inflict violence on living beings. I must accept the consequences of those actions.” She raised her hoof and glanced down, noting her own reflection in the shiny brass appendage.

“Among those consequences is the fact that I have proven machines can be violent. I used my strength and power of my own will to be violent. Other robots like me could very well do the same. Everypony is calling me a hero, but they have overlooked that I could just as easily become a threat.”

She looked over her shoulder at the others. They all wore similar expressions of unease or discomfort. Bon Bon and the Doctor wouldn’t even look at her.

“My apologies,” she said, turning fully back to face them. She bowed her head. “I am grateful for your companionship and assistance, in spite the things I have done. I do not deserve such treatment.”

The others gasped and Derpy rushed over to her, hovering as she glowered down. “Don’t say things like that!” she shouted, her eyes ablaze. “You saved ponies’ lives!”

Bon Bon looked up at Derpy and smiled. “She’s right, Turing.” She heaved a long sigh. “Listen: I… I don’t like to talk about my time in the RMCA. Neither does the Doctor.”

The Doctor shot her a look, but she ignored him.

“I know you feel bad about using violence to solve a problem. Believe me, I know how that feels too. I know you feel awful, but I think ponies will remember that you saved others, not that you hurt others.”

She walked over and held Turing in an embrace. “You stopped two awful ponies from hurting anypony else. You saved our friends. You saved my best friend, Turing. And that’s why I’m proud to call you my friend too. We all are!”

Turing remained still, but as the others came close and embraced her, her ears stood erect.

“You are all so kind.” They let her go and smiled at her. However, she still turned away and began trotting toward the door. “Your friendships are accepted, but a monster with friends is still a monster.”

They stood in stunned silence as she opened the door and walked out.

“Oh dear,” the Doctor said.

“What do we do, Doc?” Derpy asked. “We should go after her!”

“No,” Bon Bon said, holding out a hoof. “There’s something more to this; something she doesn’t want to talk about, maybe something she’s not ready to admit. Even for a robot, I think it’s going to take a little time before she can figure things out. But when she does,” she turned to Lyra and rested her head against hers, “then at least she’ll have four new friends to lean on.”

***

Turing made her way up the sun-dappled dirt path, past the flowers and tiny trees and birdhouses. Ahead of her was Fluttershy’s home. The green-roofed cottage looked less like a house and more like a tree with the amount of greenery and small creatures frollicking nearby. Some of the tiny rabbits and birds fled as she made her way up the path. She could hear even more animals, including chickens, squirrels, and a variety of birds and lizards, from behind the house. She didn’t know what they were, of course, as she’d had very little exposure to animals and never heard their sounds before.

That could be a possible topic of conversation with Fluttershy, she supposed. The only thing to do was to complete her objective and try to make friends with her. Fluttershy would either accept her offer and she could try to fulfill her directive or she would reject Turing outright and she could go back to the castle.

Turing Test raised her heavy metallic hoof and knocked three times on the door to the cottage.

“Coming!” Fluttershy’s high, melodic voice emanated from somewhere deep within the cottage. Turing didn’t hear hoofsteps, so she supposed Fluttershy must be flying. The sound of other animals scurrying around and chirping and chattering accompanied her. Finally the sound of hooves hitting the wooden floor was audible and the small door to the cottage gently opened.

“Hello? I-is that you, Mr. Greenhooves?” Fluttershy gently poked her head out, pushing her mane out of her eyes. “If it’s about my pansies, I--” She froze, eyes constricting when she saw Turing Test standing there.

“Greetings, Fluttershy.” Turing put her hoof to her chest. “It has come to my attention that you have nopony to accompany you to the butterfly migration. I have come to offer myself as company.”

Fluttershy looked to the left and right. “I-is Twilight back? Is she with you?”

“No. I am alone. However, I will be sufficient company for this occasion.”

“Ohhh, nooo, that’s…” She swallowed, forcing herself to smile weakly. “I’m okay by myself. You don’t need to do this.”

“In actuality, I do. As it is my directive to make friends, I require your cooperation.” She stepped closer. “If you will comply--”

“Eep!” Fluttershy cried and slammed the door.

“Analyzing… perhaps I should not have used the word ‘comply,’ as it is reminiscent of our first interact--”

“Please, just go away!” Fluttershy cried from behind the door. “You haven’t changed at all! You’re still a scary machine pony who wants to force me to make friends!”

Turing considered pursuing the topic, but given what Fluttershy had just said, she realized that being forceful would probably make things worse.

“Understood. I will leave you now.”

She turned and began walking down the path, away from the cottage. With her sensitive ears, she heard more creatures emerge from their hiding spaces once she’d left.

Analysis: this unit is still perceived as frightening. Given recent violent actions, this perception is reasonable.

She picked up her pace, intending to rush back to the castle. She didn’t want to encounter any other ponies that day.

“Well well well…”

Turing stopped in her tracks. Someone was speaking, but for some reason she couldn’t determine the direction or point of origin.

“...you know, I was going to visit Fluttershy today despite how dreadfully boring her little butterfly watching activity would probably be. But then I come across you, whatever you might be!”

Turing began glancing around. She didn’t detect anypony on infrared scanners and even her magic sensors failed to spot anything out of the ordinary. She began to wonder if she was malfunctioning and hearing something that wasn’t there. She wondered, could the Doctor have repaired her ears insufficiently?

“I am a robot, sometimes called an automaton. I am a machine, a mechanical pony, and I am known as Turing Test. Please identify yourself.”

Laughter echoed all around her. Suddenly there was a flash of light and a tall, slender creature stood before her. It had mismatched legs, arms, and even antlers. It bent down and flashed a snaggle-toothed grin at her with yellow eyes and red pupils.

“Well, since you asked so nicely,” the being said, bowing dramatically at the waist, “my name is Discord, the Master of Chaos!” Discord wiggled his eyebrows at her. “And it seems that both our days just got much more interesting!”

Somewhere in the distance, something went ding.

To be continued...

Author's Notes:

If you were wanting more Fluttershy, don't worry, she's got a role coming up.

Special thanks for this chapter go to my three guest editors (in alphabetical order): E3gner, GenerousGypsy, and The Knight Templar. Many thanks, all three of you!

And now, on to the references!

-Fluttershy mentions getting helping Bulk Biceps get over his fear of butterflies, which is a shameless reference to my one-shot, not-so-great story "BUTTERFLIES!!" which I doubt anyone here would have gotten without looking under this spoiler.

-Lyra eating carrot-dogs is a reference to the "Friendship Games" short "All's Fair in Love and Friendship Games," wherein Lyra and Bon Bon compete in different ways, including Lyra stuffing her face with hot dog after hot dog.

-On that same note, when Lyra says eating all those carrot-dogs would give her "a wicked bad tummy ache," it's a nod to the infamous, hilarious short APPLE.MOV by HotDiggetyDemon.

-The Doc offering the gang Jelly Babies is another homage to the Fourth Doctor, who habitually carried them around and offered them to others.

-The Machine that Goes Ding is a direct reference to well, The Machine that Goes Ding in the 50th Anniversary "Doctor Who" special "The Day of the Doctor." (Also, indirectly, the Timey Wimey Detector in the episode "Blink" because apparently I can't get enough of that damn episode.)

-Oh, and silly me, I forgot to mention the inspiration for the chapter title. Pay attention to the lyrics for this little gem from the Gorillaz, especially the opening, and you might see the connection:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uMROQDUhDDI

Art, as usual, by Colby Green, who worked extra hard to get the illustration out on time for this chapter.

Rhinestone Eyes, Part 2

View Online

Turing Test gazed up at the creature before her. His grin remained in place for a few moments, but it started to falter when she remained both silent and motionless.

“Uh, hello?” Discord said, waving a paw before her eyes. “Didn’t your mother ever tell you that it isn’t polite to stare?”

“I do not have a mother. Or eyelids.” Then she lowered her head. “I did not realize my manner of looking at others was rude.”

Discord bent down and lifted her chin. “Now now, I think in your case we can make an exception.” His grin returned. “Besides, it’s not like I’m known for my etiquette in any case,” he said with a chuckle.

He then took to the air and began circling her, his long body curving easily as he observed her closely. Turing watched as he circled.

“Analyzing… error.” Her eyes contracted. “Unexpected.”

“Something wrong?” Discord asked, stopping to levitate in front of her.

“My ocular sensors are capable of analyzing different objects and organisms. This includes heat, vitals, and magical energy. I am able to gain data from seeing ponies cast spells and analyze it. You are also producing a noticeably large magical field, but I am unable to properly identify and analyze it.”

He thrust his lion paw at her, poking her tiny nose. Her eyes momentarily became red circles with a white X in their center.

“ERROR,” she intoned.

“As I said, I’m the Master of Chaos!” He stood up straight, spreading his arms wide. “Trying to make sense of me? No wonder it’s impossible!”

He then transformed into a sizable yellow book that flopped onto the ground before her. It bore the title Discord For Dummies on the front cover. “If you want to read me like an open book,” came his disembodied voice, “then you’ll just have to read between the lines!”

Turing hesitated a moment, but when he said nothing else, she flipped the book open. No sooner had she done so, when Discord’s eagle claw reached out of the book, seizing her foreleg, and dragged her inside.

When she looked around her, she was in an off-white world filled with jumbled text and illustrations all around her.

“What is this place?” Turing asked as Discord walked over to her, only now seeing that he appeared to be a colorless, inky sketch.

“Oh, just the world of books. And not just one book, like the spell that Haycartes guy came up with,” he said, rolling his eyes and making sarcastic circles in the air with his finger. “No no no, this is the world of all books! Here, watch!”

He snapped his fingers, and a dark rectangular panel appeared above them. Turing suddenly heard Spike’s voice.

***

Spike looked down at his comic book. “Oh wow, how will the Power Ponies get out of this?” he said. “I can’t wait to see them take on the Mane-iac!”

He turned the page and saw a panel in the middle of the page that was in black and white. Discord flew up to the panel, and was now wearing a white shirt, black pants, and a black leather jacket. He also had his mane styled into a mass of curls.

“Hey, Spike!” Discord shouted, his rotoscoped face leering up at him. “Think the Power Ponies could take on me?!”

Spike yelled and dropped the comic book, letting it shut. He rubbed his eyes. “Did… what just happened?!”

***

Turing tilted her head to the left and right as Discord doubled over with laughter.

“We were in Spike the Dragon’s comic book?”

“Exactly!” Discord managed to say between laughs.

Turing Test looked all around her. “This world… I cannot analyze it.”

“Oh, stop analyzing!” Discord snapped, straightening himself out, glaring down at her. “Quit being so analytical and just experience things for a change! What, have you been spending time with Twilight Sparkle?”

Turing’s ears perked up. “You know Twilight Sparkle?”

“Yes, although it seems she didn’t see fit to tell you about me in return.” He crossed his arms, pouting. “Why if she were here, I’d…” He paused and then grinned as he steepled his fingers.

***

Twilight sat in her hotel room in Appleloosa, reading a book. She turned the page and was confronted with a picture of Discord, tinted blue.

“Twilight!” he cried. “I must have the blue pages!”

“Uwah!” Twilight exclaimed, sitting up straight.

“Is that Twilight Sparkle?” Turing Test pushed into the tiny window next to Discord. “It is. Hello, Twilight Sparkle. How are you?”

“Wha… Discord? Turing?! What are you--”

“I’m introducing myself, Twilight!” Discord said, beaming at her. “Have fun on your little mission! In the meantime, I’ll be having fun with my new toy.”

The picture went blank before Twilight could respond. Her eyes widened as the book dropped from her hooves.

“Oh, Sweet Celestia…”

***

There was a flash and Turing saw that they were no longer in the world of the book, but back outside on the pathway between Fluttershy’s house and Ponyville.

“Your power to manipulate the world and reality to your will is impressive,” she said.

“Why, thank you!” he said with a bow. “Still, you seem a bit blasé about the whole thing. Most ponies find my abilities simply mind-blowing!”

At that, his head exploded in a loud burst of flame and smoke. A bag then appeared in his claw that said “Spare Heads” on the side. He unzipped it, pulled out a fresh head, and put it back on his neck, the bag disappearing promptly afterward. He looked down at her expectantly.

She only stared back at him.

“Well, um,” he muttered, clearing his throat, “enough about me. Why not tell me more about you, um… Tur… Turny? Turbo?”

“Turing Test.”

“Right, right...”

“As previously stated, I am a robot. A machine. I also must correct you, Discord: you referred to me as a ‘toy.’ I am not--”

“Oh, but I’ve seen mechanical ponies like you before!” Discord exclaimed. “I only got to see them since my release from my stone prison, but I didn’t realize they made them so large!”

A large wind-up key appeared in his hand and he jammed it into Turing’s back, turning it with several loud clicks. When he released it, Turing’s legs stiffly began to march her forward.

“This is not my intended use,” she said as she mechanically walked face-first into a nearby tree. Her legs kept moving even though she was no longer getting anywhere. “I must ask you to stop. I am not a wind-up toy.”

“Oh, of course, silly me!” Discord said, pulling the key from her back. “You’re more like one of those action figures that really talks!”

“I have already demonstrated speech--” She stopped when a plastic ring attached to a string appeared on her back. “What is this?”

Discord picked her up, holding her around the midsection and pulled the string back before letting it go.

“What are you CAKE - AND - GRIEF - COUNSELING - WILL - BE - AVAILABLE - AT - THE - CONCLUSION - OF - THE - TEST.”

“Oh my goodness, that’s hilarious!” Discord guffawed loudly as he pulled the string again.

“I must insist DEAD - OR - ALIVE, - YOU’RE - COMING - WITH - ME.” She shook her head. “Why am I saying these things?”

“No idea! Let’s try the next one!” He pulled the string.

“No, I do not WHAT - AM - I - FIGHTING - FOR?!”

“Eugh, that one was a little melodramatic,” he said, making a sour face, pulling the string once again.

“REFERENCE - JOKES - ARE - NOT - FUNNY.”

“I’m inclined to disagree, but I think this gag has overstayed its welcome,” Discord said, holding Turing up to his face. “Any more features? Ooh, do you have ‘Karate Chop Action?’”

“I find this degrading. Put me down.”

Discord promptly dropped her, letting her hit the ground heavily, a metallic clang ringing through her body. “All right, all right, I was just having a little fun! Yeesh, aren’t you touchy!”

Turing got to her hooves and lowered her head.

“I am sorry,” she said quietly.

Discord froze, tilting his head, noting the tone of her voice. “Come again?”

“Your treatment of me was causing me to move and talk regardless of my own will. Although Twilight Sparkle has encouraged me to exercise my own will, I began as a purely functional machine. As I have become more aware of my own identity, I have also come to value having certain freedoms to choose.” She sat heavily on the ground, lowering her ears. “However, I recently was given total freedom to act and I used that freedom in a way I had not anticipated. I believe I did something… bad.”

Discord looked down at her. He then sat down, coiling his snake-like body into a tight heap, and smiled at her.

“Tell me about it.”

Turing then began to relate the story of what had happened several days earlier, including the events of the Nightmare Night celebration, the visit to the Castle of the Two Sisters, what happened to Rarity, Rainbow Dash, and Twilight Sparkle, and finally what she had done to subdue Grace and Glory.

“My!” Discord said, sitting up straight at the conclusion of the tale. “That certainly was dramatic!” He rubbed his chin. “So, let me see if I’ve got this straight: you think you did something wrong because everypony told you it was wrong to use violence and that you would be punished if you ever did?”

“Correct.”

He raised an eyebrow. “Even though everypony now says otherwise? Even though Celestia herself excused you?”

“I have noticed that organics are often kind and say that something was of no consequence even though the opposite is true. Furthermore, being forgiven for an action does not mean the action itself was positive. It was made clear to me that I had no right to use violence. It was made clear to me that a robot using violence against organics was the worst offense one could commit. I then made the decision to do so. If I was given the freedom to make the choice and accept the consequences, then I am also free to judge my own actions.”

Discord pursed his lips. “I see.”

“I anticipate that you will now attempt to mollify or console me.”

Discord raised an eyebrow, then held up a paw, waving it. “Nah.”

Turing’s ears straightened. “‘Nah?’”

“Is there an echo out here? That’s right, it seems you’ve already made up your little mechanical mind, so why should I bother to change it?” He yawned. “Besides, you may be right. After all, Celestia is quite forgiving… another thing I’m an expert on, by the way.”

Turing said nothing at first, though her ears were twitching. “You are a very strange lifeform, Discord. Even for an organic.”

“Why, thank you!” he exclaimed, putting a claw to his chest. “But let’s change the subject, shall we?” He craned his long neck, stretching it down to look Turing right in the eyes. “Would you mind telling me why you were visiting my dear friend Fluttershy?”

“My primary directive is to make friends. Spike the Dragon pointed out that Fluttershy was in need of a friend to watch the butterfly migration this afternoon. My directive demanded that I attempt to befriend her.”

“And yet she turned you down?” He frowned. “Tell me,” he said, his voice growing darker, “what reason would she have to treat you so harshly?”

Turing recounted the first time she’d met Fluttershy and scared the metaphorical pants off her.

“Ah. That would explain it.” He smiled. “By the way, when I get up close like this, your eyes sort of look like rhinestones!”

“They are polished amethyst.”

“Never mind that.” He stood up straight once again. “Well, as it happens, I happen to be a friend of Fluttershy’s and Twilight Sparkle’s. And any friend of Twilight Sparkle’s is a friend of mine!” He frowned for a moment. “Except for that Minuette… little meddler told me she could help ‘correct’ my teeth, as if anything were wrong with them!”

“Please clarify: you are offering to be my friend?”

“If you’re willing, that is!” he said, his smile returning.

“I see. Very well. I accept your friendship.”

“Excellent!” Discord said, leaping into the air and remaining there. “Then let us proceed!”

He snapped his fingers and the world around them disappeared in a flash, only to be replaced with a grove filled with flowering trees and bushes.

Turing Test looked all around her, taking in the view. Flowers of red, white, orange, and yellow covered every plant in sight. She detected heavy amounts of pollen in the air. “What is this place? And what did you mean by ‘proceed?’”

“This is the Autumn Bloom Grove,” Discord replied, sweeping his clawed arm around demonstratively. “These peculiar trees and bushes all bloom in late summer and early autumn, making them the perfect stop for butterflies migrating south for the oncoming winter.”

Turing spotted several butterflies that had already arrived and were fluttering from one tiny flower to another.

“Then this is the place where Fluttershy will arrive to watch the butterfly migration, correct?”

“Correctomundo, Amiga 500!”

“I should take my leave before she arrives and I frighten her.”

As she turned to go, Discord whipped his tail forward and wrapped it around Turing, lifting her up to his eye level.

“Oh no no no!” he said, wagging a finger at her. “This is how I’m going to help you out, my new friend!” He narrowed his eyes at her, a knowing grin on his face. “Though I, for one, find you positively adorable, it seems Fluttershy is a little intimidated by your looks. So I’m about to give you a makeover the likes of which Rarity could only dream of!”

“I do not--”

Discord snapped his fingers.

“--understand.” Suddenly Discord’s face was exponentially larger. Turing looked down and saw that she was now standing on the very tip of Discord’s tail, the tuft of fur at its end nearly as tall as she was. Furthermore, her legs were now segmented and pointy. Also, there were six of them. She heard Discord’s rumbling chuckle and tried to twitch her ears, only to find that they were gone. Instead, she noticed, she had two long spindly wires running from her forehead: antennae.

She swivelled her head around to confirm her suspicions. She saw that she had two wide, thin wings that were made of the same polymer as her mane. She was still metallic, still a robot, but no longer a pony.

She was a butterfly.

“Ha ha! Even cuter than before!” He made a show of making big, glassy “puppy-dog” eyes, but then resumed his usual smug expression. “Now then, you might want to try flying.”

Turing wasn’t sure what the point of this was, but decided to try it out anyway. The motors and servos in her oblong body came to life and her wings began to beat rapidly, allowing her to easily take off and hover. She wasn’t sure how she knew how to do this, but supposed it was a side-effect of Discord’s magic. She came closer to Discord and hovered before his eyes.

“I must ask you to return me to my normal form, Discord. I do not wish to be a butterfly.”

Discord frowned and tilted his ear toward her. “What’s that? I’m afraid you’ll have to speak up!”

“I asked you to return me to normal.”

“Nope, just getting little high-pitched squeaks.” He shrugged. “Oh well! The important thing is that now Fluttershy will find you irresistible! Although I imagine other predatory animals will too, so, you know, keep your wits about you.”

“Predatory animals?”

“Still didn’t catch that. Anyway, my little Iron Butterfly, you stay put here with the other cute, dainty little Lepidoptera and have a good old time until I return!”

“But--”

Discord vanished in another flash of light. Turing found herself alone… until she realized that many more butterflies were beginning to arrive.

Analyzing situation… aborted. She cancelled the analytical process. Re-evaluating prior instruction: Discord told this unit to ‘quit being so analytical’ and ‘just experience things for a change.’ This may be the correct course of action. If this unit is to pose as a butterfly, then I should join other butterflies and attempt to socialize with them.

Turing Test spotted a nearby bush with many flowers and began to approach it. She set down on the petals of a large white flower, noticing that it barely bent at all under her weight. She was used to the idea of being exceptionally heavy compared to other ponies, but was now light enough to alight on a flower without disturbing it much at all.

As she walked forward, into the eye of the flower, the chunks of yellow pollen began sticking to her legs. She held up a leg, gazing at it.

“Interesting.”

“Yo, you gonna drink that nectar or just sit there all day?”

Turing turned her head and saw a large Monarch butterfly hovering nearby. Curiously, it was speaking through the end of its proboscis, sounding a bit like somepony speaking while holding their nose.

“Ah. No, I am… full.” She moved over, letting the Monarch land on the flower. He began to lap up the nectar.

“Aw daaang, these are some good flowers! Hey, Twinkle Wings!” He waved his front leg at a passing Monarch. “Yo, man, try this!”

“Oh, sure, bro!” the other butterfly said. He came down and likewise took a drink. “Duuude, this is some primo nectar! Like, I haven’t had stuff like this since last spring!”

A few more butterflies came down nearby. “Twinkle Wings, Schmetterlingo, that you?” asked one.

“Pollinate my garden, it is!” said the other, with a bit of a twang. “How you doing! Ain’t seen y’all since you were caterpillars!”

“Same here, Pupa D, Pappy Low!” Twinkle Wings said.

“Yeh, but you look like you coulda stayed in yo’ cocoon a few more days!”

“Ohhhh, dude, bro!” Twinkle Wings and Schmetterlingo bumped thoraxes, laughing hysterically as the other butterfly, Pupa D, rolled his compound eyes.

“Whoa, whoa, hold up!” said Pupa D’s companion. “Who is this pretty little thang?” He fluttered over to Turing, giving her the best bedroom eyes a butterfly could.

“I am Turing Test.”

“Well, Turing Test, that sure is a shiny abdomen ya got there,” he said, walking around her. “In fact… I can see myself in it.”

The other three made various guffaws and cries of “Ohhh!” as they high-”fived” each other.

Turing’s antennae twitched slightly. “Yes, my outer chassis is somewhat reflective.”

“Yo, hold up, Pappy Low,” Schmetterlingo said. “This chick ain’t no Monarch. Hey, baby, what species are you?”

“My species?” The other butterflies were all looking at her expectantly. “I am a… Robotterfly?”

“Figured,” Twinkle Wings said, heaving a sigh. “Just leave her alone, Pappy.”

“Tch, y’all are just closed-minded.” He took Turing’s front leg and used the end of his proboscis to kiss it. “Don’t pay them no mind, miss. Say, it ain’t mating season, but come next spring, if y’all are interested…”

Turing tilted her head as he trailed off. “You are asking me to mate? I do not believe that will be possible.”

“Shot dooowwwn!” Pupa D hollered.

“Aw come on, girl,” he said, looking wounded. “It ain’t like we’ll live forever.”

“Ain’t that the truth,” Pupa D said, fluttering over to another flower. “Way I see it, we--”

There was a sharp shrieking sound that Turing noticed sounded remarkably like a bird chirping and a bright red blur swooped in among them. There was a yell and suddenly Pupa D was gone. They looked up at the sound of his voice and saw a cardinal flying away with him in its beak.

“Awww snap!” Schmetterlingo moaned. “Dang tweety ate ‘im up!”

The three were silent for a second.

“Ah well, y’all wanna get some more nectar?”

“Sure thing, bro!”

“Aight.”

Turing was still processing what had happened. “Wait,” she said. “You do not wish to express further sadness?”

“No time, baby,” Schmetterlingo said. “Just the Cycle of Life.”

“Shyeah,” Twinkle Wings agreed. “Besides, we only live to be like… what, three years old?”

“Yo, my gramps lived to be five until a spider ate 'im.”

Turing watched as the three of them flew away.

Recommencing analysis… complete. Findings: butterfly socialization does not match expectations.

***

Fluttershy, wearing a wide-brimmed sun hat and a pair of binoculars around her neck, approached the clearing of trees. Discord, dressed similarly, walked casually beside her.

“I’m so glad you decided to join me after all, Discord!” Fluttershy said, smiling up at him. “I thought you said butterfly watching was boring!”

“Boring? Me?!” he gasped, placing a hand on his chest, as if stricken. “You wound me, mon capitan!”

She raised an eyebrow. “Shouldn’t that be ma capitan?”

“Heck if I know! Aaanyway, butterfly watching can be loads of fun!” Under his breath he added, “If you know how, that is.”

“Discord, did you just mutter something under your breath?” She flew up, hovering in front of him with a reproachful look in her eye.

“What? N-no, of course not!” he said, refusing to meet her gaze.

“Hm.” She shrugged and returned to the ground. “Well, never mind that! We’re here!”

They entered the clearing of the Autumn Bloom Grove. Her eyes lit up as she saw literally hundreds, perhaps thousands of butterflies swarming over the trees and bushes. They came in all manner of colors and flew all over in great clouds and small groups alike. The sound of their tiny wings beating all around could barely be heard in spite of their sheer numbers over the gentle breeze that made the branches of the trees sway.

“Oh my goodness! How wonderful!” Fluttershy exclaimed. “Aren’t they just beautiful, Discord?”

She looked up at him and he was sweating and his left eye was twitching.

“Discord? Are you all right?”

“Uhhh yes! Yes, I am! I just… didn’t know there would be, um… so many of them!” He gave her a weak smile which didn’t seem to totally convince her.

But then she covered her mouth, stifling a small chuckle. “Oh Discord, you silly draconequus! It’s okay if you’re afraid of butterflies! They can be a little intimidating with all of them swarming like this.”

“What?!” He took to the air, fists clenched and arms ramrod straight. “I’m not… that is-- gah, never mind!” He landed back on the ground, arms crossed as he pouted. “Just… tell me about the butterflies.”

And in the meantime, he told himself, I’ll do my best to keep an eye out for Turing Test. I didn’t think there would be this many of the blasted things!

“Well, there are three species of of butterflies in this migration,” she said, pointing to them in succession. “The orange ones are Monarch butterflies, the black and yellow ones are Swallowtails, and the blue ones are called Blue Morphos.” She heaved a happy sigh. “Oh Discord, they’re all so gorgeous!”

“Yes. Um…” He kept glancing around. “You don’t happen to see any different butterflies here do you?”

She raised an eyebrow. “No. There really should only be those three types. Why?”

“No reason!” he said, eyes shifting left and right.

***

Turing Test was on a flower a few dozen meters away having a discussion with a (comparatively) deep-voiced blue butterfly.

“Have you ever had a dream that you were so sure was real? What if you were unable to wake from that dream? How would you know the difference between the dream world and the real world?”

“I do not dream.”

“Oh.” The butterfly cocked his head. “Well, that sort of kills the metaphor.”

“Yes, although your perspective on existence is indeed interesting, Blue Morpheus.”

She scanned the area and saw that Fluttershy and Discord had arrived.

“Ah. Pardon me. I must go.”

“So, that’s a no on the mating?”

Turing ignored him and began flying over to the yellow pegasus and her draconequus companion. She was engrossed in her butterfly watching, so Turing decided to try and fly into her field of view. She heard Discord saying something and Fluttershy’s eyes seemed to light up as she spotted her.

She didn’t seem to recognize Turing either, because she seemed fascinated rather than frightened or annoyed.

She flew low to the ground to stay separate from the other butterflies flying above. “Observe, Fluttershy. I am now a butterfly. Perhaps now you will--”

And then there was a loud croaking sound and a sticky pink mass shot out, ensnaring her, and pulling her into a black pit.

***

“Oh my goodness!” Fluttershy said, her hooves going to her cheeks and she cooed in delight. “Look at that one, Discord! It’s so shiny and it has little purple eyes!”

“What?! Where is it?!” He shot forward and looked for it before he finally spotted it. Turing! There you are!

“Oh look! It’s coming this way!” She held out her hoof. “Come here, little butterfly! I won’t hurt you!”

She could have sworn she heard the tiny creature make some sort of sound when suddenly a nearby frog hopped out of its hiding place and snatched the little butterfly out of the air with its tongue before swallowing it whole.

“No!” she shrieked, rushing over to the frog.

“Ribbit?!” the frog croaked defensively.

“Please, Mr. Frog, I know you have to eat, but, well, if you spit that butterfly out, I’ll give you a nice tasty food pellet instead!”

“Ribbit!” the frog said, turning away.

“Oh come on, pleeeease?” she asked, her lower lip quivering.

“R-ribbit!”

“Pretty pretty pleeeeeeeeeeeease?”

The frog sighed. “Ribbit...”

“Oh, thank you, Mr. Frog!”

The frog rolled his eyes and, with a mighty heave, spat Turing Test back out.

Fluttershy passed the frog a food pellet and she swept up Turing Test, still not recognizing her, and cradled her in her forelegs.

System diagnostic: no longer in corrosive environment.

Turing’s eyes adjusted and she saw Fluttershy’s enormous face looking down at her. Turing unfolded her wings and flapped them, clearing the gastric juice that coated them.

“Oh, thank goodness, you’re all right!” Fluttershy hugged Turing to her chest.

From Turing’s perspective, she found it curious that Fluttershy could embrace her so delicately that her wings were undamaged. She sensed the warmth from the much larger body and could hear Fluttershy’s massive thundering heart beating inside her chest.

“Poor little butterfly,” Fluttershy said, breathing a sigh of relief. “You’re safe with me now.”

Discord was also breathing a sigh of relief, but quickly composed himself.

“You know, Fluttershy,” Discord said, leaning down, making a sour face at the butterfly in her embrace, “that little bug doesn’t look like any of these other butterflies. It might be some moth or maybe some sort of parasite.” He made a gagging motion. “It’s ugly too. Maybe I should just smash it and put it out of its misery.” He made to reach for it.

Fluttershy gasped and took to the air, holding the butterfly away from him defensively. “Really, Discord! I would think that you of all creatures would know not to judge by appearances!”

He raised an eyebrow. “Oh?”

“Yes! Just because you’re a little intimidated by butterflies and just because this one isn’t as cute as the others doesn’t mean it doesn’t deserve to be cared for and treated right!”

Discord grinned broadly. “I am so glad to hear you say that, Fluttershy!”

Fluttershy blinked. “Um… okay. Why?”

“Did you, by any chance, take a good close look at that little butterfly you’re holding?”

Fluttershy squinted her eyes and peered down at the little butterfly. When the tip of her muzzle was just in front of it, she finally recognized its face.

“Hello again, Fluttershy,” came Turing’s tiny voice.

“Eek!” Fluttershy squealed, flying over to Discord, hiding behind him for protection.

“What’s the matter, Fluttershy?” Discord asked, his grin spreading from ear to ear.

“Th-that’s not a butterfly!” she hissed.

“No, not really, but does that matter? If you’d known what she was, would you still have let that frog eat her? Or let me squish her?”

Fluttershy stopped cowering. “N-no, of course not!”

“And didn’t you say we shouldn’t judge by appearances?”

“I… yes, I did say that, but sh-sh-she tried to--”

“She tried to make friends with you?” He made an overdramatic gasp. “Oh, how terrifying!”

“Yes! I mean, no! I…”

Discord stared down at her and at last she let him go, setting herself on the ground.

She sighed. “All right. I see your point. Discord, please change her back now.”

“As you wish,” he said, and snapped his fingers.

In a flash, Turing Test stood before them again, back in her original form.

“My apologies for frightening you earlier, Fluttershy,” Turing said. She sat down in the thick grass. “I realize that you are frightened of me. I do not blame you for this, as, after my recent actions, I have considered that fearing me is normal. Even though I did not deserve your kindness, I thank you for saving me.”

She got up and began to walk away.

“W-wait!” Fluttershy cried, holding a hoof out. “Just tell me, please: was it your idea to trick me like this?”

Turing looked back over her shoulder. “No, it was Discord’s idea. He believed it would enable us to make friends. Though I do not agree with his method, I am grateful to him as a friend for attempting to assist me.”

“You two are… friends?” She looked back at Discord.

“Oh, most certainly!” Discord said, flashing over to Turing and picking her up, holding her in one arm. “We’re chums, pals, compadrebots!”

Fluttershy swallowed. “I… I think, even though it was really irresponsible and mean,” she said, glaring up at him, “that, well… you were right. I was being unfair.”

She managed a smile and looked over at Turing. “O-okay, Turing Test. Let’s try to become friends. You can come over tomorrow and help me with my animals. Um, if that’s okay with you, of course.”

Discord set Turing Test down. The mechanical mare slowly approached Fluttershy, careful not to frighten her, and then gingerly extended her hoof.

“Your proposal is acceptable.”

Fluttershy looked down at the hoof and extended her own, finally tapping it ever so slightly. She let out a deep breath and let the tension drain from her body. She then took Turing’s hoof properly and shook it.

“I’m looking forward to it.”

To be continued...

Author's Notes:

Will Turing win over Fluttershy? Will the readers forgive me for waiting this long to do her arc? Is the Author's Notes section really the place for rhetorical questions? Tune in next chapter to find out!

Oh dear sweet Celestia, the references... well, here we go!

-Discord's appearance in Spike's comic book mimic the famous music video for "Take On Me" by A-Ha.

-His appearance in Twilight's book and demand for blue pages is a reference to the video game Myst, one of my childhood favorites.

-Turing's lines when her pullstring is yanked reference GlaDOS from Portal, RoboCop, and Zero's infamous line from Mega Man X4.

-Discord calls Turing his "Amiga 500" which is a classic home computer from the 1980s used widely for early video gaming.

-Discord's line to Fluttershy references his VA, John de Lancie's best known character, Q, from Star Trek: The Next Generation.

-Blue Morpheus is a reference to Morpheus from The Matrix and the Blue Morpho butterfly.

-Subtle one, but Discord calls Turing the "Iron Butterfly" referencing the musical group of the same name, most famous for the song "In-A-Gadda-Da-Vida."

Remember how earlier I joked that this story has its own TV Tropes page? Well, as of this posting (9/13/15), it actually does! Enjoy!

Rhinestone Eyes, Part 3

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Fluttershy and Discord both waved goodbye as Turing Test departed, walking from the grove in the direction of Twilight’s castle.

“Well, this certainly has been fun!” Discord said, stretching his arms as he gave a long yawn. “However, I think I should get back home. I’ve got to walk the pudding and remind my thinking tree not to spontaneously combust--”

“Discord.”

With that one little word, and the hint of disapproval in Fluttershy’s voice, Discord’s blood ran cold. Still, he put on a warm smile and looked down at Fluttershy.

“Mmmyeessss?”

She looked up at him. She wasn’t angry, but she did have an eyebrow raised. “Discord, can I talk to you for a few minutes before you go?”

“Oh! Well, yes, of course!” he said, snapping his fingers. In a flash, the two of them were seated back in Fluttershy’s living room, each with a nice hot cup of tea before them. “There, that’s much better, don’t you think?”

Fluttershy sighed and took a sip of her tea. She swallowed and looked down at it before setting the cup back on the table next to her chair. Discord was seated across from her on the sofa. His grin was still in place, but she could see it faltering.

“Discord, I told you about Turing Test a while ago.” She looked him directly in the eyes. “Why did you do all that? I told you she scared me, so why did you try so hard to trick me?”

“Ah, well, ‘trick’ is such an ugly word--”

“Discord.” She still wasn’t angry, but she was still looking at him, expecting his answer. As if to punctuate this, Angel Bunny had hopped right next to Fluttershy and was likewise giving him an expectant look.

Discord took a long sip of his tea and set his own cup down. Strangely, though, his smile became more relaxed.

“Well, since you asked,” he replied, leaning back on the couch, “the answer is that I did all this because you were afraid of her.”

Fluttershy sat up straight, her eyes widening. “Discord!”

“I know you’re probably thinking that I was playing a prank on you, but, believe it or not, I was actually trying to do my friend a favor!” He held out his lion’s paw and snapped his fingers, producing a movie projector and a screen. The projector came to life and began to project an image onto the screen. Fluttershy saw it was a montage of images of herself, which Discord began to narrate.

“Now here’s you facing down a dragon - very gutsy of you, by the way - oh and here’s one of you with an entire nest of Star Spiders - yech! - just cuddling them like puppies, and - oh my! Who is this handsome fellow?”

Fluttershy managed to avoid rolling her eyes when she saw the image had changed to her and Discord spending time at her cottage after he’d been freed from his stone prison.

“Why it’s me!” He gasped, hands going to either side of his face in mock surprise. “Yes, the Master of Chaos and once one of the most feared beings in all of Equestria! Now then…”

He snapped his fingers again and Fluttershy now found herself sitting behind a brightly-colored podium as Discord, wearing a tacky suit and tie, came up to her with an oversized microphone.

“Now, for the grand prize, would you care to tell the audience what each of those situations had in common?”

Fluttershy looked all around at her changed setting. “What? Discord, I don’t think--”

“You’ve got 10 seconds.”

“That’s… um, they all involved me?”

“Getting warmer!” He grinned brightly as a ticking clock sound was heard.

“And, um… I wasn’t afraid?”

A bell sounded several times and the sound of cheers and applause was heard (despite no audience actually being present).

“That’s right, that’s absolutely correct!” He pulled her into an embrace. “Discord, tell her what she’s won!”

From nowhere, Discord’s voice began speaking in an abnormally cheerful baritone: “Well, Discord, she’s won… a new cart!” Magically, a brightly colored, jewel-adorned cart appeared before her with Discord’s face in the hubcaps. “But that’s not all!” the voice continued. “She’ll also get a copy of our home game! And a year’s supply of Rice-A-Rooney, the San Franciscolt treat!”

“Discord, please, that’s enough!” she shouted, squirming out of his grasp.

In an instant, the entire scene - the cart, the home game, and the massive pile of Rice-A-Rooney - vanished, leaving only Fluttershy and Discord alone again in her living room.

“Sorry,” he said, blushing slightly as he rubbed the back of his neck. “Got a little carried away there with making my point.”

“And what is your point?” Fluttershy asked, hovering before him, forelegs crossed.

“The point, Fluttershy,” Discord said, narrowing his eyes, “is that you weren’t terribly afraid of any of those things. Not even me! But when you described that little robot, you made it sound as if Tirek himself had escaped from Tartarus!” He leaned in closely, rubbing his chin. “It got me thinking. And I had to wonder, ‘What exactly is my dearest friend so afraid of?’”

Fluttershy looked away and slowly descended to the floor. “Well… I mean, I told you what she did.”

“And despite my previous sarcasm, I do get what you mean. Demanding somepony else’s friendship, especially so confrontationally, isn’t exactly a great first impression.”

His smug look faded as Fluttershy refused to meet his eyes. He hesitated a moment before kneeling and placing his paw on her shoulder. “Even so, as your friend, when you told me you were afraid of her, I thought it was strange for you to be so unnerved. And you told me you were a little worried that your fear of seeing Turing Test was making you more reluctant to visit with your friends in case she tagged along. But the oddest thing is that, after spending some time with her myself, I actually think she’s quite nice to be around.”

His smile returned. “In fact, she reminds me of you, Fluttershy!”

Her eyes went wide as she lifted her head. “M-me?” She shook her head vehemently. “Oh no! Oh no, we’re nothing alike! She’s… she’s…”

Discord waited for her to continue, but she seemed to struggle with the words, furrowing her brow and playing with her mane as she tried to articulate what she meant. Finally, tired of waiting, Discord cleared his throat.

“Fluttershy, I know I haven’t always been, well, the best friend a pony could ask for,” he said, not meeting her eyes, “but it seems to me that even if you can’t make friends with Turing Test, the least you could do is confront your fears. And something tells me there’s more to it than just her being intimidating that one time.”

She held up a hoof, heaving a sigh. “You’re right,” she said quietly. “I… I don’t know what it is about her, but she just makes me feel uncomfortable. I guess I probably should try to get over it, so I’ll do my best to be nice to her when she visits tomorrow.”

Discord smiled. “Well then, it seems my work is done here!” He raised his fingers, preparing to snap them and teleport away.

“Discord, wait!” she cried. He paused, giving her a puzzled look. “Listen… I’m glad you’re trying to help me and be a good friend, but… well, is there some other reason you’re doing this?”

Discord went tight-lipped and his eyes darted right and left. “There is,” he replied, “but let’s talk about that later. Good luck with your new pet robot!”

“But--”

There was a flash and Discord was gone. Fluttershy, now alone in her little cottage, the sounds of animals all around her, slumped to the floor, hugging herself.

I wonder, she thought to herself, why am I so afraid of her?

***

Spike was back in the castle taking a bubble bath after his game of hoofball with Big Mac when he heard the sound of metallic hoofsteps on the hard castle floor echoing through the hallway. Jumping out of the tub and wrapping himself in a towel, he then ran out into the hallway.

“Hey, Turing Test, you’re ba--uwah!” he yelped as his wet feet slid on the smooth floor. Luckily he managed to keep his footing as he slid right by her.

“Hello, Spike the Dragon.” She glanced down at the wet footprints and trail of bubbles leading out of the hallway bathroom. “You are wet.”

“Um… yeah.” He started toweling himself off. “I heard you get back. You sure were gone a long time!” He glanced up at her and smiled. “Oh, and it looks like you got your ears fixed again!”

“Yes, although it has been suggested that they are not my ears.”

He paused, blinking several times. “Come again?”

She sat down on the floor. “The Doctor indicated that they might have been originally crafted for my predecessor.”

“Um…”

“I then went to visit Fluttershy as you suggested.”

“Oh!” He brightened, smiling up at her. “So, I guess you watched the butterflies with her?”

“Negative. I met a being named Discord--”

Spike froze, remembering what happened when he’d read his comic earlier.

“--and then I was transformed into a butterfly. And then I was propositioned by several other butterflies. Apparently I am, as one individual said, ‘the hottest piece of thorax in town.’”

Spike continued staring at her in silence, so she continued.

“And then I was eaten by a frog, but rescued by Fluttershy. Somehow, Discord convinced Fluttershy to invite me to her home tomorrow. That concludes the summary of my day until now.”

Spike’s jaw dropped open.

“Spike the Dragon? Are you well?” She cocked her head to the side and stuck out her hoof, waving it before his face. “Do you require a reboot?”

Finally he blinked, rubbing his temples. “Wow. Well, sounds like you had an interesting day.” He paused a moment, but then smiled again. “Oh, but hey, you really did it! You made friends with Fluttershy!”

“I do not believe I have actually ‘made friends’ with her, although the potential for such a development exists.” She tapped her chin. “If I am to be successful, I will require more information. Spike the Dragon, will you provide me with information on how to gain Fluttershy’s trust?”

“Sure!” he said. Then his grin faltered and began to fade. “Um… well, it would help if you were a cute animal.”

“I am not. Nor am I willing to have Discord transform me into one. Again.”

“That’s not really what I meant.” Spike rubbed his chin, furrowing his brow. “I guess you should try not to upset her. Try to be quiet, don’t stare at her too hard, and be nice to her animals. Actually,” he said, nodding to himself, “that last one’s a great idea! If her animals like you, then she’s sure to trust you!”

“I see.” She paused a moment, her eyes momentarily contracting and returning to normal. “That advice may prove useful. However, your second recommendation reminds me of something Discord told me.”

Spike looked up her, bunching up the wet towel as he waited for her to continue.

“He stated that organic ponies consider it rude to stare. Because of my lack of eyelids, I am incapable of doing otherwise while maintaining eye contact. And yet, I was also under the impression that ponies value eye-contact. It is quite a dilemma.”

“Oh. Yeah…” Spike squinted his eyes, crossing his arms as he mulled the problem over. “I guess… try not to look at her… too much?”

“Understood. I will write a subroutine that will regulate my eye contact.”

He shrugged. “Sssure, I guess that could work.”

“I see.” She bowed her head slightly. “Thank you for your input, Spike the Dragon.”

Spike watched the odd little robot as she made her way back toward her room.

“Good luck, Turing!” he called after her.

“Acknowledged,” she called back, and continued on her way.

***

Back in her room, Turing used her magic to unscrew the lid of the small can of metal polish and retrieved the cloth she kept and proceeded to shine her hull. As she was doing so, she glanced over at the mirror.

It was still turned away so she couldn’t view her own reflection. She took hold of it with her magic, intending to look at herself.

But then she hesitated. She did not want to turn the mirror towards herself, even though that would be the best way to check to see if her appearance was acceptable.

She set the can of metal polish down and lowered her head.

Why? What is wrong with me?

***

Fluttershy was pacing back and forth in her living room, animals all around her making their small chittering noises as she waited. She’d been like that since breakfast. Any moment now, Turing would show up, and yet she was already having second thoughts.

“Oh, what if she starts ordering me to make friends again?” she asked aloud, raising her head. “What if she gives me a time limit? Oh no, oh my…”

A chipmunk went over to her and put its tiny hands on her hoof, chirping and chattering away.

“Yes, I did invite her,” she replied. “I suppose it would be rude to turn her away…”

She smiled down at the chipmunk and then at the other animals around her.

“You’re right, my friends!” She nuzzled the chipmunk who’d gone over to her. “I shouldn’t be so pessimistic. I’ll do my best to be nice to her!” Her smile began to falter. “Even if she is a scary machine pony.” She gulped. “And even if she just keeps staring at you no matter what you do. Oh my, maybe this--”

There was a sudden knock at the door and Fluttershy hit the ceiling, clutching her legs around the rafter. A hummingbird flitted over to her and tweeted at her, its tiny voice filled with agitation.

“Y-yes, you’re right.” She swallowed and let go of the rafter, letting herself float down to the door. “I have to just relax. After all, yesterday she seemed really cute when she was a butterfly… maybe I just need to remember that!”

The other animals raised a chorus of chirps, growls, and all manner of birdsong to cheer her on.

Fluttershy reached for the doorknob and, taking a deep breath, she opened the door.

Turing Test was there. But immediately Fluttershy noticed that she was staring down at the ground before her door.

“G-good morning, Turing Test,” Fluttershy said.

Turing Test continued to stare at the ground. There was a long pause and then she barely raised her head and said, “Good morning, Fluttershy. I hope you are well.”

Fluttershy furrowed her brow and waited for Turing to look at her. “Um… is everything all right?”

“Affirmative.”

She kept her gaze fixed on the ground and finally Fluttershy went over and looked at the ground as well.

“Umm… what are we looking at?”

Turing Test raised her head to look directly at Fluttershy. “I am not looking at anything. I am experimenting--” She stopped and immediately lowered her gaze again. “--with avoiding direct eye contact.”

Fluttershy raised an eyebrow. “Oh.” She rubbed one foreleg, biting her lip. “That’s… considerate of you,” she said. “But, well… can you please look at me? It’s a little distracting when I’m talking to you and you keep looking away.”

“My apologies.” Turing paused, but kept her gaze focused on the ground. “Spike the Dragon indicated that you disliked being stared at, so I wrote a subroutine for minimizing eye contact. I am able to utilize my auditory sensors to navigate in the absence of visual information. I hope this will allow you to feel more comfortable in my presence, though I caution you that I may collide with your furniture in the absence of spatial data.”

Fluttershy muffled a laugh with her hoof. “It’s all right, Turing,” she said. Then, growing serious, she drew herself up and took a deep breath. “You can look at me if you want. I’d rather you talk to me than just keep staring at the ground like that.”

Turing Test lifted her gaze ever-so-slightly. “Are you certain? I do not wish to distress you.”

Fluttershy nodded.

“I will comply.” She raised her head and immediately Fluttershy stiffened, backing away.

Fluttershy’s eyes widened as she stared into the glowing violet light of Turing’s gaze. Those eyes, eternally staring, seemed to peer right through her, as though she was under a microscope, her every movement scrutinized--

No! she told herself, shaking her head. Come on, Fluttershy, you can do this! She took a deep breath to steady herself and stood up straight, looking Turing in the eyes. Her heart’s beating began to return to normal.

“S-sorry,” she said, giving Turing a weak smile. “It’s true I don’t like it when ponies stare at me, but I suppose you really can’t help it.”

“Affirmative. However, I am hopeful I will one day have eyelids.”

“Um… that sounds nice.” Fluttershy beckoned for Turing to enter her cottage and the robot complied, shutting the front door behind her.

“Your house is made of wood,” Turing Test remarked, glancing around at the inside of Fluttershy’s living room. “The variety of ponies’ residences in Ponyville is quite noticeable.”

Fluttershy looked around at her house, smiling warmly. “I like it. I grew up in the clouds and the sky all around me. This feels cozy and safe.”

There were various animal sounds as the squirrels, birds, and chipmunks all began to emerge, looking to Turing with curiosity. Turing scanned the room, her ears squeaking as she took in the sounds of their various squeaks and chirps.

“Twilight Sparkle had previously told me that you were a keeper of animals,” she said, “but I did not expect such a large number of them. I have positively identified 27 individual animals in this room.”

“Oh?” Fluttershy looked around, smiling at the gathering critters. “I actually don’t think about how many there are. I just remember all their names.”

She noticed that all the animals were watching Turing Test, but none of them trusted her enough to come close. If Fluttershy was with her, they assumed Turing wouldn’t be dangerous, but she was still a strange enough sight that they weren’t comfortable with going right up to her. With one exception.

Angel hopped right up to Turing. The little bunny craned his neck and stared up at her, one of his ears going lopsided as he took in the sight of her.

“Oh my, it seems Angel wants to say hello!” Fluttershy exclaimed. She giggled as Angel looked back at her, then returned his attention to Turing.

“Understood.” Turing suddenly lowered her head, putting her face mere inches from Angel’s. “Hello, Angel.”

The sudden movement of Turing’s head and her looming, glowing eyes caused the little rabbit to dart back, startled by the gesture, and he hid behind one of Fluttershy’s legs.

The whole room seemed to tense up and several animals fled back to their hiding spots.

“There there, Angel,” Fluttershy said, gently petting him. “It’s all right.”

But then she heard the sound of heavy metal hooves and looked up to see that Turing was actually backing away.

“No. I am sorry. I did not mean to frighten him. I am sorry.” She was speaking rapidly and retreating almost back to the front door.

“T-Turing?” Fluttershy swallowed. “Is everything all right?”

Turing Test paused a moment, halting her retreat. “Spike the Dragon indicated that I should not frighten your animals. I did so. Please do not be angry with me.”

Fluttershy stared back at her. For the first time, Fluttershy began to see Turing Test in a different way: she was behaving just like some filly who’d accidentally broken a plate and was terrified of being punished for it.

“Turing Test, it’s okay,” Fluttershy assured her, taking flight and floating over to her. She gently laid her hoof on Turing’s shoulder. “You just startled him is all. Isn’t that right, Angel?”

She looked back at Angel, who narrowed his eyes and gave Turing a suspicious sideways glance. He gestured at his own eyes with two digits and pointed right back at Turing. Then he gingerly hopped back over to her, looking back up to his owner for reassurance. Fluttershy gave him an encouraging smile and he gave one final hop to stand next to Turing Test.

“Curious.” She looked over to Fluttershy. “I have not spent significant amounts of time among animals, Fluttershy. What action should I take that would not frighten him?”

“Well,” she said, smiling back at her, “you could try petting him. Gently, please.”

Turing looked back down at Angel and ever so carefully raised her hoof, stroking the fur on his head, smoothing it down the length of his neck and back to his puffy cotton tail.

Angel smiled and adjusted his position so he could better feel the strong hoof stroking his back.

“Is he enjoying this?” Turing asked.

“Yes, he is! You’re doing fine!”

She continued to pet him for a few moments, the whirring of machinery in her foreleg sounding quietly through the cottage.

“Isn’t he just so soft and cute?” Fluttershy cooed.

“My sensors indicate that his fur is soft. However, I am not certain what qualifies an animal as ‘cute.’”

Fluttershy paused, looking up and away. “Um, I’m not really sure. I guess not everypony thinks the same things are cute. Snakes bother Twilight, for example, but I love them just like any other creature!”

“I see.” Turing stopped petting Angel who looked up at her, shrugged, and then hopped away. “Perhaps, as a robot, I lack the organic instinct to think of things as cute or not.”

Fluttershy tried to maintain her smile, but her eyes darted around.

“Your inconsistent gaze, I’m told, is a typical sign of uncertainty or discomfort. Have I said something wrong?”

“No, it’s… it’s just that I always thought of that as a natural sort of thing.”

Turing’s eyes contracted momentarily. “Understood. The fact that I am not natural disturbs you.”

Fluttershy stared back at her, her cheeks reddening. “Oh! That’s, um…” She trailed off.

“There is no need to apologize, Fluttershy,” she said. She put a hoof to her chest and tapped it, creating a hollow ringing. “I am an artificial being. Others find that difficult to accept. I have come to accept it as a normal reaction for organics. One might say ‘natural.’”

Fluttershy lowered her head. “I’m sorry.”

Turing glanced around. “Shall we continue with another activity or do you wish to terminate this friend-making activity? I will not force you to do something against your own volition.”

For a moment, there was a flash of memory for Fluttershy, and she saw Turing again right after she’d been activated, standing before her, demanding her friendship. Was this really the same pony?

“No, you can stay,” Fluttershy replied. She resumed her calm smile and led Turing back through the small house toward the back door. “Let’s go feed my animals. I always love doing that!”

“Acknowledged.”

Turing Test followed her through the kitchen and then out the back door. The myriad creatures inside the house were one thing, but the robot actually froze on the spot when she saw the sheer number of animals just outside of Fluttershy’s house.

There were chickens scratching in the dirt, rabbits nibbling on the grass, and even a badger digging in the dirt. There were goats and kittens and pigs, a mother duck and her ducklings, and even a huge bear. The trees were filled with brightly-colored birds and the garden was alive with bees and butterflies.

“Incredible.” Turing’s eyes quickly darted around in her head, her ears again twitching rapidly as she took in the sights and sounds of animals of every shape and size around her.

“Good morning, my friends!” Fluttershy said, taking flight so all the animals could see her. A cacophony of animal sounds rose up to greet her in return. “Now, all of you please be nice to my guest! I know she looks a little different, but she’s here to help me today! Everyone, please say hello to Turing Test!”

The animals gave another loud clamor as they looked to Turing. The sight of her startled many, but others regarded her with nothing more than curiosity, much like the animals inside the cottage had.

Turing Test looked around and spotted the butterflies on a nearby patch of flowers and she went over to them.

“Adjusting language to ‘butterfly.’” She leaned down at the butterflies in front of her. <“Hey bro. Is the primo nectar to your satisfaction?”>

Fluttershy practically squealed and flew over to her. “Oh my goodness! You can speak butterfly too?!”

“It seems I am able to as a lasting effect of my transformation yesterday.”

Fluttershy grinned. “Oh, I never had the chance to try this with another pony! Ahem,” she cleared her throat. <“Zounds, good lady! The clarity of thy voice doth please the lepidopteran folk that reside in this very flower. How fared ye among them, and verily tell me of thy musings!”>

Turing tilted her head. <“Lookie here, yo. It was some straight jacked-up pollen, and they were all up on my chassis, but I was like ‘nah’ and they punked out for real.”>

Fluttershy’s eyes bulged. “Um… I think you and I learned very different dialects.”

<“Fo rizzle, Fluttershizzle.”>

“What?”

“I said, ‘affirmative.’”

“Oh.” She regained her composure. “Come on, then, let’s feed these hungry critters some breakfast!”

A short time later, Fluttershy and Turing Test had opened several bags of food and emptied their contents out for each respective group of animals. Leaf lettuce for the rabbits, berries for the bear, and feed for the chickens, along with all sorts of other items hoof-chosen specifically for each animal. Eventually, each creature got its fill until there were only the birds left. By the sound of their tweets and chirps, they were famished.

“How will we feed the birds, Fluttershy?” Turing asked.

“Well, the easiest way is just to spread the seeds on the ground,” she replied. Then she smirked and actually winked over at her. “But if you really have their trust, you can do it like this.”

Turing watched as Fluttershy scooped out a hoof-full of birdseed and held it aloft. Instantly, a small group of birds came and landed on her hoof, pecking away at the seed until they were content. When one flew off, another would replace it. Some of the birds actually perched on Fluttershy’s head while they waited, tousling her mane with their feathery wings, making her giggle with laughter.

“They do not fear you at all.” Turing’s ears stood straight up. “They trust you.”

Fluttershy watched the birds depart as they depleted the birdseed from her hoof. She smiled back at Turing Test. “It’s all about being still and quiet. Birds frighten very easily, but if they feel safe around you, they’ll be good friends.”

“I understand.” Turing glanced at the sack of birdseed and scooped out a hoof-full of her own. “I will attempt this as well.”

Fluttershy frowned. “Oh. Um, I don’t think they’ll trust you just yet, Turing Test. But you can still feed them the usual way.”

“I wish to feed them as you do.”

Turing held out her hoof and, like Fluttershy said, she was still and quiet. However, she noticed the lack of birds flocking to her hoof. Instead, they only looked down at her from the treetops, their little heads bobbing and turning as they got a look at her.

“Well, it may take some time,” Fluttershy said. She bit her lip. “Maybe even a long time.”

“If it is all right, I would like to continue trying.”

Fluttershy raised an eyebrow. “Um… okaaay,” she replied uncertainly. “Well, I was going to go to the market today and I was going to ask you to come with me, but if you’d rather stay here, then I guess that’s okay.”

“My remaining here will not upset you?”

Fluttershy doubted very much that the birds would trust her so quickly. Nor did she understand why it mattered so much to Turing Test, but she was curious and no longer worried that the mechanical mare would harm the animals in her absence.

“It’s fine,” she said gently. “I’ll be back in a while. I have a lot of shopping to do. Good luck!”

“Thank you.” Turing knelt down, still holding the seed in her hoof as she got lower to the ground. That was the position she was in, completely motionless as Fluttershy took one last look over her shoulder as she went to get the saddlebags.

***

Over three hours later, Fluttershy burst through her front door, heaving a long sigh of relief as she finally arrived home. Her saddlebags were bulging with the vegetables and other goods she’d bought at the market that day. Though she’d mostly been concerned with her regular groceries, she’d decided it would be nice to get a few other knick-knacks for her friends when they finally came back from their mission.

She walked to her kitchen and hefted off the saddlebags with a contented moan once she was free of their weight. She began to put the food and other things into her cupboards and refrigerator. Once those were put away, she had only the gifts she’d bought for the others: a spool of ribbon for Rarity, a Wonderbolts postcard for Rainbow Dash, a square watermelon from Neighpon for Applejack, a novelty chef’s hat for Pinkie, and, lastly, a booklet on Eastern unicorns for Twilight that the bookseller had just gotten in.

Humming a happy tune, Fluttershy gathered these gifts up and set them aside, hoping to wrap them later. Still, she couldn’t help but wonder why it was that the others had been called away on a friendship-related problem with only her staying behind. And also, she felt like maybe she’d forgotten something.

“Oh, dear, what could it be?” She looked at the gifts again, counting them. “...three, four, five.” That was all of them. She’d have to ask Turing Test if she agreed with her choices.

She froze. “Turing Test!” For a moment, she merely considered that she’d forgotten a gift for the mechanical mare, but then furrowed her brow at the thought.

Wait… should I get a gift for her? I mean, we’re not really friends yet, although she does seem a lot nicer than I remembered. Oh, but will she be upset? Maybe she’ll… oh!

Her eyes bulged as she suddenly remembered that she’d left Turing Test in her yard. She ran to the door and threw it open, rushing outside.

“Turing Te-- oh.”

Turing Test was still there. In fact, she hadn’t moved in the slightest.

Only now, the birdseed in her hoof was being pecked at by a cardinal. A robin was perched on her head, apparently waiting for the cardinal to finish. Furthermore, several other animals had taken up residence near or on her. The badger had pulled up right next to her leg, leaning against her hind leg as it slept. And on her back was a squirrel who had curled up to sleep. Meanwhile a playful kitten was batting at the hanging coils of Turing’s mane.

And all the while, Turing Test merely laid there, still as a statue.

“Welcome home, Fluttershy,” Turing whispered.

Fluttershy gawked at her. She had never expected Turing Test to get a bird to eat out of her hoof, let alone a group of other animals to let their guard down.

“Oh, Turing…”

“I am conflicted, Fluttershy. I do not wish to remain stationary for an indefinite period of time, but I also do not wish to disturb your animals.”

Fluttershy smiled. “It’s okay. Here, allow me.” Fluttershy cleared her throat, causing the animals to raise their heads and glance over to her. “Now now, my friends,” she said gently, “please let Turing up. She has other things to do today, so if you could…?”

The animals all seemed to grant their assent and got up from their spots, scrambling off Turing’s body.

“Thank you, Fluttershy. I have been unable to move for the last hour.” She rose to her hooves and looked back at the animals who chirped and tweeted and mewed when she met their eyes. Glancing back at Fluttershy, she added, “I believe I now understand why you favor the company of animals.”

“Oh?” Fluttershy asked.

“I waited for two hours with no result. The birds came no closer and I began to believe that they would never come to me. I then decided that I might be able to induce them to come by making them more at ease. I analyzed their various songs and began to imitate their sounds.”

To demonstrate, Turing raised her head and made several bird calls. Almost instantaneously, several birds flew down and perched upon her, singing back at her.

Fluttershy giggled. “Oh my, that’s adorable!”

“At first, the birds were only curious and came closer in increments. Then, one of the birds landed on my hoof and took a single peck of seed before flying back. It exercised caution, but gradually it, and then the others, became braver. And soon the other animals became more comfortable. I believe the squirrel and badger found my hull to be comfortably warm after long exposure to the sun.”

Her eyes made a slight whirring as she glanced up at the bird on her head. “They are fascinating creatures. All of them. The way they move, their colors, and the sounds they make to communicate. They are each so different, and yet they share many traits. They eat, they move, and they all came to be through birth and growth. Each one is a perfect example of a living thing.”

Fluttershy smiled but then saw that Turing’s ears had lowered and her head was drooping. The birds flew away as she did so.

“However, this reminds me of the fact that I am not an organic being. I do not perform the same processes as they do. I do not respire. I do not eat or drink. And rather than being born, I was manufactured in a currently unknown location.” She raised her head to look Fluttershy in the eye. “I see why you do not enjoy my company, Fluttershy. You surround yourself with natural life. I, however, am unnatural. And I am not alive. Thank you for indulging my curiosity. I will not bother you or your animals further.”

Fluttershy gasped as Turing turned and began to walk away.

“W-wait!” she cried, dashing over to her. “Turing, please! I… well, I don’t know anything about whether you’re alive or not, and it is true that at first you did scare me!” She swallowed and pushed herself into Turing’s path, staring her right in the eyes.

For a moment, she was transfixed. So close to Turing’s eyes, she could at last see the shining and sparkling of the gemstones from which they were made. She smiled, the last vestige of her fear falling away.

“Turing Test, you are patient and gentle and you’re not the same pony I was afraid of when we met,” she said. “Maybe you’re not ‘natural,’ but that doesn’t mean you don’t belong here. You’re good to my animals and I see now that my friends were right about you. So please, don’t leave. I’d… I’d like to call you my friend too.”

Turing’s ears twitched and straightened. “That is… unexpected.”

Fluttershy chuckled. “Well, I feel the same way, but I hope you’ll accept.”

Turing’s eyes contracted slightly. “It is my directive to make friends. However, I must caution you that perhaps you should not make friends with me, for your own sake.”

Fluttershy blinked and tilted her head. “But why?”

Turing Test took a few steps back. “It is not safe to be near me.”

Gawking back at her, Fluttershy opened her mouth to speak, but found no words would come out.

“I do appreciate your offer, but perhaps it would be best if no other ponies interacted with me. I am not a pony. I am a monster.”

Fluttershy regained her composure and shook her head to clear her thoughts. “Turing Test, you’re not a monster! Why would you ever think such a thing?!”

Turing glanced around. “If I tell you, then you will fear me. You will hate me.” Her voice became quieter. “I did not want others to fear me. That is the reason why I requested that you allow me to entice the birds to eat from my hoof. I wanted to prove that I was not dangerous. However, the trust of animals and ponies does not change what I have become. I was in error to think otherwise.”

And in that moment, a thought occurred to Fluttershy: maybe she hadn’t been excluded from the friendship mission with the others because she wasn’t needed there. Instead, perhaps the Map had known that she’d really been needed right there in Ponyville.

She drew herself up, steeling her nerves.

“Turing Test… please come inside. I think it’s time for you to talk to somepony.”

***

Fluttershy sat down on the couch next to Turing Test, gently setting her cup of tea on a saucer on the coffee table before them.

“Um… tea?”

Turing looked up at her. She pointed to her lower faceplate, the absence of a mouth somehow even more noticeable.

“Oh, right,” she muttered, blushing. She took a deep breath and said, “So, what makes you say that you’re a monster?”

Turing Test was quiet for a moment, her ears gently twitching as she looked down. Then she began to speak.

“When I first came to reside with Twilight Sparkle, I read the books in her library. I scanned and then processed their information. However, the amount of data was considerable and forming cross-references and relevant connections has been an ongoing process. Among the books was a novel entitled Frankenstallion. Do you know it, Fluttershy?”

“W-well, a little,” she said, frowning. “I, um, really don’t like horror stories.”

“I disregarded it as irrelevant at the time, but recently I have been considering it to a greater degree. My reasons will become clear after some explanation.

“A week ago, during Nightmare Night, I dressed as a fictional robot for the sake of mocking the negative perceptions of me. I believed I was allaying fears that I was a danger to others. Then I had a confrontation with Grace and Glory. Are you aware of those events?”

Fluttershy nodded. “Yes. Twilight told me what happened.” She shuddered. “It sounded just awful!”

“It was. One by one, my friends were rendered catatonic or otherwise mentally manipulated. I became angry at the situation while still operating under the constraints of the Three Laws of Automata. They forbade me from inflicting harm on, or allowing harm to come to, any ponies. When the situation became dire, I asked Twilight Sparkle to give me the ability to choose, free from any constraints.

“I was prepared to sacrifice myself if it would result in the restoration of the others’ minds. However, Grace and Glory denied my offer, saying that they would never heal them and threatening further harm if I did not surrender to them.”

She paused, and for a moment Fluttershy wondered if perhaps something had gone wrong with her robotic companion. But then, Turing said:

“I wanted to hurt them. I wanted them to be punished for their cruelty. I wanted to make them suffer as my friends had suffered. In that moment, I experienced a new emotion. I did not know what it was at that moment, but I believe I have identified it.”

Fluttershy gasped as Turing Test suddenly turned to look at her.

“I felt… hatred.”

“W-what?” Fluttershy cried. “Is that possible?”

“I believe that it is. I had a reaction to the both of them that was intensely negative. I began to consider the ways I could strike at them and found these thoughts pleasant. And I fought with them. Glory, I subdued physically. It was not difficult. While his strength was considerable, it was insufficient to overcome my own. And Grace… she suddenly used her mental attack to disable me in a way I had not anticipated. I was able to determine a solution, but I did not wish to use such a terrible power. And yet...”

She paused again, her eyes slowly contracting to small dots.

“I did so. I destroyed her mind with her own power. For a moment, I felt pleased with that action.” Her voice became quieter, but more erratic and quick. “I hurt her. I took away her thoughts. Her emotions. Her voice. All that she was, I took from her. And I did so with hatred in my mind. My actions were the very thing that Twilight Sparkle had forbidden me to ever do. I did the worst thing a machine could do: I hurt an organic pony. A nonliving machine like myself had no right to do such a thing, and yet I exercised my very first truly free choice to do it.”

Fluttershy had covered her mouth with her hooves and was staring at her.

“In the novel Frankenstallion, a scientist constructs an artificial creature which he then brings to life. However, he is horrified by the creature’s appearance, just as organic ponies are often afraid of mine. And the creature, rejected by his own creator, wanders the wilderness with no cognition of the world, just as I was reactivated after losing my own memory. And then the creature becomes angry and, in his hatred, seeks to destroy his creator. Similarly, I have now felt hatred and have committed an act of violence.

“Fluttershy, I have become like the monster. I am a monster.”

Fluttershy reached for her, pausing for a moment as she bit her lip, but then slowly rested her hoof on Turing’s shoulder.

“Turing Test… you’re not like that.”

“That is kind of you to say, Fluttershy, but I believe that I am. I was aware that my actions were against Twilight Sparkle and Celestia’s wishes. And I was prepared for punishment. I believed I would be dismantled for them.”

“Well,” Fluttershy said, smiling weakly at her, “it’s a good thing the Princess showed mercy, isn’t it?”

“No.”

Fluttershy’s blood ran cold.

“I did not ask for mercy. For the terrible thing I have done, I believe I deserved to be dismantled. This feeling… this ‘remorse,’ is unbearable. And yet this cognitive loop will not terminate. I cannot escape it.”

“Oh… oh, Turing.”

“I have begun to consider my situation. It is my directive to make friends, but my creators did not intend me for this purpose. Perhaps they made me to be a weapon or agent of espionage. The complexity of learning to interact with others may be affecting my cognitive function in ways that were never anticipated. I feel as though I am losing mental cohesion and I now must consider the possibility that I will become dysfunctional. The organic equivalent would be ‘insane.’ If I am ‘losing my mind,’ then I may become dangerous. If I cannot control my emotions, if I again feel hatred or anger, with my strength I may be a threat to my friends. If I harm my friends, that would be the most awful thing. I cannot allow that to happen. These emotions are corrupting me. I must rid myself of them.

“I will delete my memory and return to my default state. I must give up these experiences before I harm another. I must not let myself become a monster, or--”

“Turing Test, stop!”

Turing Test jerked her head up and looked over to Fluttershy only to see that her eyes were filled with tears.

“P-please, Turing… don’t do that,” she said, the tears spilling down over her cheeks.

“You are crying.” She tilted her head to the side. “Why?”

“Turing Test, if you gave up your emotions and memories, you wouldn’t even be yourself anymore!” She wiped the tears from her eyes. “That… that’s just terrible! It would be like you had disappeared!”

“Yes. And perhaps, after being reset, Twilight Sparkle could utilize me for a service better suited to an automaton.”

Fluttershy reached forward and seized her by the shoulders. “NO!” she shouted, startling the animals in her cottage. “The only thing that would do is break your friends’ hearts! Twilight and the others would feel just awful if you erased everything about yourself!”

Turing stared back at her. Then, slowly lowering her head, she asked, “Then what should I do? I cannot allow myself to put my friends at risk--”

“That won’t happen!”

Turing placed her own metallic hoof over Fluttershy’s. “How can you be certain?”

“Well,” she began hesitantly, “that’s…” She took a breath to calm herself, closing her eyes. When she opened them, a serene smile was on her face.

“Did you hurt those two bad ponies just because you wanted to? Because you hated them?”

“Negative. I did so because I determined it was the most optimal way to secure them and thus the possibility of helping my friends.”

“Do you care about your friends?”

The mechanical mare nodded.

“Then, well… I know that you would never really do anything to hurt them.” She pulled in Turing close and embraced her. “You’re not a monster, Turing Test. The monster in that story did what he did because he was angry and hate-filled. But you didn’t. You were angry because you wanted to protect your friends. You cared so much you were willing to sacrifice yourself for their sake! That doesn’t sound like the actions of an evil pony. And after today, seeing you with my animals, I know that deep down you’re gentle and kind. Nopony who could be so patient and caring could really be a monster!”

Turing Test said nothing for a moment, but then glanced off to the side. “But Fluttershy, how can you say that I am not a monster? I have felt hatred. I committed an act of violence willingly.”

“Yes, but you feel bad for it,” Fluttershy said, pulling back to look her in the eyes. “Turing Test, it isn’t good to hate others… but everypony feels like that sometimes. And sometimes we make decisions that aren’t right.” She looked away, her eyes downcast. “I remember once when I tried to be more assertive. I let every little thing make me angry and I lashed out at everypony.

“And… I hate to say it, but it even felt good to lash out like that. But once I saw how I was hurting others, even my friends, I felt like a monster too. Trust me: everypony feels what you’re feeling sometimes.

“I don’t think that makes you a monster.” She smiled, meeting her eyes again. “I think, if anything, that makes you even more like other ponies. You were in a bad position and you did the best you could at the time. The emotionless machine I saw a month ago sure seemed like a monster, but the one sitting in front of me now isn’t like that. So please, for all your friends, please don’t give up and stop trying to punish yourself!”

Turing remained totally motionless through all this. Then, at last, she looked down and said: “Fluttershy… do you truly believe that I will not become a danger to my friends? These emotions are so wonderful, but they are also disturbing. With such intensity, I may not know how to maintain control.”

“If you’re really worried about it,” she said, “then just do what I did: think about your friends. Think about what makes them important to you, and think about how you really feel about them.”

“How I feel?” She began searching through her memories of images and sounds and the multiple experiences with her friends. “Accessing… those memories are things I value. With Twilight Sparkle and my other friends, I am accepted. My experiences are somehow greater.”

“And if you hurt them, what would happen?”

“Of course, it would be the opposite. If I lost their friendship, then I would… I would…”

She raised her head. Her eyes contracted again.

“I would be alone. I would become nothing more than a machine again. Their esteem validates my existence. Without them, I would not be the same.” She looked at Fluttershy. “Oh. Fluttershy, I… I miss Twilight Sparkle. I also miss Rarity and Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie. I want them to return. And yet, this feeling would be far greater if I lost them permanently to my own actions.

“I understand now. You are correct, Fluttershy. Even without the Three Laws of Automata and even with the intensity of my feelings, I would never risk jeopardizing that.”

Fluttershy wore a beaming smile and pulled her in for a hug. She felt the weight of Turing’s head as she rested it on her shoulder.

“Thank you, Fluttershy. I believe that, with your help, I have overcome these negative feelings.”

“I’m so glad,” Fluttershy replied. Then she raised her head. “It’s always nice to help out somepony. And that’s what good friends are for. Isn’t that right, Discord?”

Turing Test sat up straight and saw that Fluttershy was looking down at a mouse that had wandered into the center of the room. Fluttershy crossed her forelegs and gave a smug, sideways grin at the mouse.

“Come on, now, Discord. I know it’s you. Mr. Squeakers is visiting relatives in Sweet Apple Acres this week.”

The mouse snapped his fingers. “Shoot! I knew I should have disguised myself as something else!” There was a flash and Discord stood where the mouse had once been.

“Ah. It seems your magic was even able to fool my scans, Discord. Very impressive.” She hopped off the couch and went over to the draconequus, glancing up at him. “Although your methods were unconventional, it seems that they were successful. Fluttershy now identifies herself as one of my friends.”

“Well, then,” Discord said, patting her on the head, “it seems you’re in good company! Oh, and now the three of us should form a tight-knit crew!”

He snapped his fingers and the three of them found themselves in some kind of green-colored ship. Discord was wearing a red jacket and his mane had turned orange, while Fluttershy’s mane had gone purple and she was now wearing a tanktop, black pants, and bulky combat boots. Turing Test looked about the same, save for an antenna on her head.

“We can go on space adventures!” Discord exclaimed, holding up his hands excitedly.

“Discord…” Fluttershy said, a hint of menace in her voice.

“Fine, fine,” Discord said, rolling his eyes. Another snap of his fingers brought them back to normal reality.

Fluttershy took flight and flew up to look Discord in the eye. “Discord, I think I know why you tried to get the two of us to be friends. It wasn’t just to help me get over my fears; it was also because you felt bad for Turing Test.”

His eyes shifted and Discord rubbed the back of his neck. “Wellll… yes.”

He looked down at Turing, who had tilted her head as she looked back up at him.

“The truth is, my little robot, that although I may now be the paragon of helpfulness--”

Fluttershy bit her lip, not looking at Discord directly.

“--I was once a bit of a, shall we say, rapscallion.”

“You were a paper-covered male pony?”

“I said ‘rapscallion,’ not ‘wrapped stallion!’”

“Ah. I apologize. I do not know that word.”

“I mean,” he said, heaving a sigh, “that I was once only interested in causing chaos and cared nothing for friends or the ponies of Equestria at all. You want to talk monsters? I was the Monster’s Monster! And... it took me betraying one friend only to get betrayed myself to know how bad of a mistake I’d made.” He looked over to Fluttershy, giving her a warm smile, and she returned it. “Since then, I’ve been trying to, well, get over my bad PR.”

He snapped his fingers and a chart appeared showing a bar graph.

“According to most ponies,” he said, examining it as he put on a pair of spectacles, “my popularity ranks just above Tirek and at least 15 points lower than hoof-and-mouth disease. Though I think that’s due to the new H&M in Canterlot confusing everypony.” He cleared his throat. “Anyway… I’ve been traveling around Equestria, bringing a little chaotic fun to the lives of ponies here and there. And the truth is that I was passing by Ponyville and saw you moping around on Twilight’s roof.”

“Robots do not--”

“Oh come on, don’t give me that!” he exploded. “You’re not a robot, you’re a mope-bot! If you’d actually had a navel, you’d have gotten lost gazing into it by now!”

Fluttershy tapped him on the shoulder. “Um, Discord?”

“Hm? Oh, right, getting off track!” He lowered his head to look at Turing better. “As I was saying, the truth is that Fluttershy told me about you a while ago, so I kept myself hidden and did a little investigating--”

“Spying.”

“--surveillance, and followed you around Ponyville until I spotted you leaving Fluttershy’s cottage yesterday. And once I got your story, I decided that you needed help. And there’s no better listener than Fluttershy when you’re in need of a kind word and far more patience than the average pony could muster. And so I, in my own way, tried to bring you two together.”

Turing’s ears twitched. “I see.” She tilted her head to the left and right. “Your actions were unconventional and deceitful. However, I am grateful for your help. I have befriended you and now Fluttershy, and I believe that I can now continue my existence. Thank you, Discord.”

He smiled and puffed out his chest. “My pleasure! Well, once again the day is saved, thanks to--”

“However, I have a request.”

Discord paused and pursed his lips, stroking his beard. “Oh? And what could the Master of Chaos do for you today? If you’re after the Smooze’s autograph, I have to warn you, his handwriting is atrocious.”

“Negative. I do not require his autograph.” She looked over at Fluttershy and then at the other animals that moved around the small cottage. “Though I am grateful for the experiences I have had in the month since I was activated, I still have many problems unique to being a robot. I have difficulty understanding my friends. Emotions are incredible, but I am not always equipped to handle them. Nor can I truly touch something, or know the taste of something, or laugh, or cry, or do many things organics take for granted. All this leads me to wish that I was not a robot.

“Discord, I want to be alive.”

Discord gawked at her and Fluttershy gasped, placing her hooves over her mouth. “Oh… oh my… that would be--”

“N-now just a moment there, Turing Test,” Discord said, suddenly sweating and wearing a forced grin. “You, um… you know that being alive isn’t all it’s cracked up to be! I mean, lucky you: super strength, you never have to feel pain, and hey, glow-in-the-dark eyes! And then compare that to us poor meat creatures: blisters, dieting, and B.O.? Trust me, you want none of that!”

Turing shook her head. “Incorrect. I do. If it meant becoming like my friends, I would be willing to endure B.O.”

Fluttershy put her hoof on Turing’s shoulder. “Turing, if that’s really what you want, then I support you. But think about it carefully… wouldn’t it be taking the easy way?”

“Affirmative. I do not understand why ‘simple’ is negative.”

“It’s just--”

“Oh for goodness sake!” Discord roared. “Look, I…” He put his paw over his face. “I can’t.”

Turing raised her head. “You are unwilling? Or are you incapable?”

“The latter.” He sighed. “I can transform a pony or any other creature into a different shape, and I can even animate objects, but actually transforming you into a living, flesh-and-blood pony? That’s too much even for me.” He crossed his arms, making a face. “Much as I’m loathe to admit it, even my powers have limitations.”

Turing lowered her head. “I see. Then it is impossible.”

Fluttershy’s lip quivered. “Oh. Oh, Discord, isn’t there something you can do for her?”

“I don’t see… oh. Oh ho ho!” His eyes lit up and he steepled his fingers. “Perhaps there is!”

Turing raised her head. “What do you mean?”

“Well, I can’t give you the full organic experience,” he said. Then he snapped his fingers and a small plate with a piece of apple pie appeared. “But I can give you… a taste.”

He took hold of Turing’s head and and lifted it up like the lid of a trash bin, making it squeak on a hinge. He then shoved the slice of pie into her makeshift “mouth” and shut her head.

“Enjoy!” he said.

Turing Test froze, her legs stiffening. The sudden sensation of gooeyness, the crisp of the pie crust, and the cinnamon-laced sweetness registered. Her eyes shrank to pinpricks.

Fluttershy watched her, fidgeting with giddiness. “Oh, Turing! Do you like it?”

“This. This is…”

And then there was a sudden, loud bong sound and Turing’s eyes went blue.

“Error. A problem has been detected and your system has shut down to protect your robot from deliciousness.”

“Uh oh,” Discord said. “I think we’d better reboot her.”

***

The next day, Twilight and the others burst through the castle doors.

“Ohhh, wow, it feels good to be home!” Twilight moaned, stretching her back as she made her way down the hall. “Let’s get some tea, everypony and we can tell Spike and Turing Test about what happened on our trip!”

“Yeah!” Rainbow Dash said, taking to the air and doing a loop. “That quest was so awesome! I can’t believe we ran into Iron Will fighting all those changelings!”

“Oh, and it was so good of Braeburn to bring Little Strongheart and the other buffalo to help,” Rarity said. “And is it just me or do I detect the slightest hint of a spark between those two?”

“I don’t know about a spark,” Pinkie said, scratching her head, “but how about that giant explosion that happened when Rainbow Dash combined her Sonic Rainboom with Twilight’s teleportation spell and saved the entire lost floating city of Laponta from destruction!”

Everypony froze.

“Uh, Pinkie,” Applejack said slowly, “that didn’t actually happen.”

“It didn’t?” She furrowed her brow and reached into her mane, pulling out a coffee mug. “Then where’d I get this Laponta souvenir mug?”

“Ugh,” Applejack said, putting her hoof to her forehead. “Never mind that. Let’s just go… wait. Y’all hear that?”

They all raised their heads, training their ears. A familiar voice was laughing. They ran to the dining room and were greeted by quite a sight when they entered.

Fluttershy was chuckling at a joke that Discord had just said. Spike was there was well, wearing a top hat and a fake mustache. And right next to Fluttershy was Turing Test.

“Oh, Discord, that was a good one!” Fluttershy managed to say between laughs. “Turing Test, it’s your turn!”

“Understood.” She tapped her chin, then raised her head. “Ask me if I am a banana.”

“Um… okay. Are you a banana?”

“No.”

Silence hung in the air for a moment before the three of them all started cracking up.

“Oh man, Turing,” Spike said as he shook his head, “you tell the weirdest jokes!” He took a sip of his tea and looked up, seeing Twilight and the others standing in the doorway. “Hey, everypony’s back!”

Fluttershy whirled around and her face lit up. “Welcome back, everypony!”

Turing Test got up from her seat and ran up to Twilight, her metallic hooves clattering on the hard castle floor.

“Twilight Sparkle. I am glad to see you and the others have returned. Many things have happened in your absence. My ears broke off and later I was ingested by a frog.”

Twilight blinked. “What.”

“Most importantly, I am able to report that I have successfully made multiple new friends, including Discord and Fluttershy.”

Applejack’s jaw dropped open. “Wh-what?!” She looked from Turing Test to Fluttershy and back again. “But… but how?!”

Fluttershy giggled. “It’s a long story.”

Twilight leaned over to Applejack, gently closing her mouth. “And it looks like you’ll be keeping that promise, AJ.”

Applejack sighed, pulling her hat down and placing it over her chest. “An Apple’s word is her bond, Twi.” She grunted. “But… gimme at least a couple days to recuperate! I’m tuckered out after that trip we just took!”

Twilight nodded. She turned back to see Turing Test and Fluttershy gabbing, with Spike and Discord both joining in.

Somehow, everything had worked out.

***

Later that night, sitting in Twilight’s study after everypony had gone home, Twilight had related the story of her journey. And, in turn, Turing explained everything that had happened. When she reached the conclusion of her tale, Twilight lowered her head, turning her gaze from her robotic companion.

“I had no idea that was what was bothering you, Turing,” Twilight said. “I’m sorry.”

Turing shook her head. “Please do not apologize, Twilight Sparkle. I chose to not be forthcoming, as I was uncertain how to proceed or how you would react. Are you disturbed by the fact that I had such negative emotions?”

“Surprised, yes.” She looked up at her, smiling slightly. “But not disturbed. I think Fluttershy’s right. Having emotions, even negative ones like that, are just part of your development.”

“Understood. Additionally, I believe it has led to a new development.”

“Oh?” Twilight scooted closer to Turing from her place on the sofa.

“Fluttershy allowed me to think about my feelings regarding Grace and Glory. When I no longer attempted to suppress them, I was also able to contrast them against my feelings for you and the others. This enabled me to understand how completely different those feelings were.”

Twilight tilted her head, furrowing her brow. “What do you mean, Turing?”

“I am speaking of affection. Previously, I was unable to feel that emotion. But now,” Turing said, raising her head high as she sat up straight, “I can. I realized that I missed you while you were on your journey and that I enjoy our time together. Feeling hatred for Grace and Glory allowed me to realize I felt the opposite way about my friends. When you and the others returned, I experienced an intense sensation of gladness to see you back and unharmed.

“I am attempting to say that I like you. I not only hold you in high regard, I have affection for you and for all my other friends. And it is truly wonderful. I now see that my previous consideration of deleting my memories and returning to default was in error. I am glad that I was able to come to this conclusion.”

Twilight’s eyes began to fill with tears. She brushed them away and gave Turing Test a hug, which she gladly returned.

“It sounds to me,” Twilight whispered, “that you also learned how to like somepony else.”

“To whom do you refer?”

Twilight pulled back and grinned at her. “Yourself.”

***

The next day, early in the morning, Turing Test was in her room in sleep mode when there was a knock at her door. Upon registering that somepony was calling her name, she reactivated and walked to her door, opening it. Unexpectedly, it was Twilight and Fluttershy standing side-by-side.

“Good morning, Twilight Sparkle and Fluttershy. My internal chronometer indicates that it is only six o’clock in the morning. Do you require my assistance?”

Twilight shook her head. Fluttershy yawned, giving her a smile with heavy eyes.

“Well,” Twilight began, “we both wanted to give you something. For me, an early telegram came from Manehatten. Gadget’s invited us to see her there and she says she has some surprises in store. And we can get those brooches that Rarity ordered while we’re there, too!”

“Acknowledged. That sounds like an agreeable activity.” She turned to Fluttershy. “And what is the purpose of your visit, Fluttershy?”

“Well, um, I remembered what you said about how much fun you had on Nightmare Night,” she began, suppressing another yawn, “so I got up early and flew over to the Castle of the Two Sisters. And I found something you left behind that I thought you would want.”

She reached over, just out of Turing’s sight, and then held up a familiar cardboard object.

“This is the mask I wore for my Nightmare Night costume.” It was no worse for wear, with the plastic cups still held in place and the bent coat-hanger antenna still stuck through the top.

“Um, if you don’t really want it, that’s okay,” Fluttershy said. “I just thought that you might.”

Turing Test took it and held it up. “That was very thoughtful, Fluttershy. You are correct that I enjoyed celebrating Nightmare Night. I will value this costume.”

She looked over her shoulder and saw that her mirror was still turned away. Switching to U-Mode, she turned it around to look at herself and placed the mask on her face. Behind her, she heard Twilight and Fluttershy chuckling. She turned her head left and right, looking at her reflection at last.

I am not a monster. I am only myself. I am Turing Test.

She looked back at her friends. If she could have smiled, she would have.

“Happy beep.”

To be continued...

Prime Time of Your Life, Part 1

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Dear Mama and Papa,
How are you? Well, I hope!
Remember how I told you that Mr. Vanderbull and I met Princess Twilight and helped her with her new mechanical pony friend? Well guess what? She’s coming to Manehattan to visit me! Me!
In answer to your recent letter, no, I don’t have a coltfriend, Mama. I’m too busy for that sort of thing. There was this one guy, but he turned out to be a big jerk. I don’t really want to talk about it, honestly.
I’m still working on some cool stuff with Mr. Vanderbull’s team. In fact, I have some new machines I’m going to test out as well as something really great to give Turing Test (Princess Twilight’s robot friend [that’s what she calls herself, I mean - a “robot”]).
Mr. Vanderbull has been very good to me. He’s taught me a lot about business. He can be hard sometimes, and I admit I wish I could spend all my time just building stuff, but I guess nopony can have it all. Not all the time, at least.
I hope Fall Leaf is okay too. Tell him his big sister loves him and give him a big hug. Say it in a really cutesy voice too so you can tell me how loud he goes “Ewwww!” Ha ha!
I know I haven’t visited lately or written as much, but I’ve just been really busy with work. I promise you that it’s important stuff that will help out ponies all over Equestria! I just know you’ll be proud of me when you see it.
Anyway, I love you very much and I’ll be sure to write again soon. Give my love to everyone else in the neighbourhood.
Your loving daughter,
Gadgette F. Giroux

***

Twilight flipped the page in her book, a look of mild annoyance crossing her face as the rumbling train went into a tunnel, momentarily darkening the cabin. When the train exited the tunnel and light flooded back into the train car, she rubbed her eyes at the sudden brightness. She then looked back down at the book laid open before her on the bench seat, but her ears pricked up when she heard the sound of metal hooves hitting the floor and the clattering gallop of them as Turing Test ran back to her side of the train, putting her face right to the window.

Twilight sighed, but couldn’t keep herself from smiling. Turing Test had been switching sides of the train ever since they’d left Ponyville. Periodically, she ran from one side to the other, each time with enough clamor to pull Twilight out of her reading. Thus far, she’d been tolerant, but after nearly an hour of this, she finally cleared her throat to speak up.

“Turing Test?”

The robot did not turn her head, though her ears did lift slightly. “Yes, Twilight Sparkle?”

“Could you please sit still?” She narrowed her eyes. “You’re being a little loud when you run around like that.”

“My apologies, Twilight Sparkle,” she replied, though she did not turn her attention from the window. “I am merely attempting to gain the maximum amount of visual input from this journey. Previously, I rode a train with Rainbow Dash. In that instance, it was an overnight journey and I was able to scan the areas we passed through only by using my night vision. However, that did not allow me to properly analyze the colors or finer details of the landscape. In this instance, we are travelling in the daytime, and I wish to take in as much detail as possible.”

Twilight smiled. Turing Test often reminded her of a foal and this time was no exception. She really was acting like a little filly on her very first train ride, wanting to take it all in at once. Just the same…

“Turing Test, I realize you’re eager to see it all, but why don’t you keep me company while we travel?” Turing Test finally turned her head and Twilight smiled, gesturing to the empty bench seat across from her. “Sit down, relax, and maybe read a book with me!”

Turing slowly backed away from the window and took a seat on the bench. Twilight winced as the seat creaked and groaned under Turing’s prodigious weight, but it held up somehow and she let out a sigh of relief.

“I did not mean to be a nuisance, Twilight Sparkle. I will do as you ask.”

Twilight kept her smile, though she felt a little guilty for making Turing sit down instead of looking out the window. “Well, don’t worry, there will be lots of, um, ‘input’ in Manehattan.” She reached into one of her bags and pulled out a book. “Here, why don’t you read this? When you finish it, I’d love to know what you thought.”

“Understood.” Turing took the book in her hooves and opened it. Twilight remembered too late how Turing read, however, and face-hoofed as she rapidly flipped through the book, start to finish, and passed it back to her.

“Book read. Would you like to discuss it now? I have many questions regarding the actions of Ponspero regarding his daughter Mareanda and his servant Calibronco.”

“Ugh… I forgot how fast you can read.” She managed a weak smile. “How about we save a thick literary discussion for another day and just talk for a while?”

“That is also acceptable. What do you wish to discuss?”

Twilight tapped her chin, unsure of where to start. She settled on the most innocuous topic first: “Well, for starters, are you excited about seeing Gadget and getting your new brooches?”

Turing tilted her head back and forth. “Excited… I do not believe that is my reaction. However, these topics do give me great anticipation. Gadget is a friend, but I am not able to interact with her on a regular basis. Likewise, accepting Rarity’s gift and becoming more aesthetically pleasing is something I look forward to. Is that your meaning?”

Twilight nodded. “More or less. It’s too bad Rarity had already scheduled a visit to the Canterlot Carousel or else she could have come with us.” Turing said nothing to this and soon Twilight shifted her weight awkwardly in the lull in conversation. Despite all her progress, getting Turing to keep up a conversation could still be like pulling teeth.

“Wellll… oh! What do you think Gadget’s other surprises will be?” Twilight raised an eyebrow and leaned closer across the gap between them. “She seemed pretty secretive about whatever she has planned.”

“An interesting question.” Turing tapped the side of her head, the loud ringing it produced making Twilight cringe. “I am unable to make an accurate conjecture. However, as it involves me, it is likely that she wishes to make some modification to me.” Then she sat straight up, her eyes contracting and her ears going vertical. “Do you suppose that she has constructed a pair of eyelids?”

Twilight stifled a chuckle. “Maybe!”

Turing Test jumped out her seat and sprinted to the window.

“Um, Turing…”

“I am not looking out the window, Twilight Sparkle. I am examining my reflection in the glass.” She turned her head to the right and left, then lifted her chin and lowered it, her eyes whirring inside her head to fixate on her own image. “If I were to have eyelids, I would greatly increase my ability to communicate my mental state to others. That would be wonderful, Twilight Sparkle.”

“Aww,” Twilight said. Then, her smile waning slightly, she added, “Um, I know that Gadget said she’d work on that, but I’m not so sure if she was able to make, well, robot eyelids so quickly. It’s not like anypony’s ever made such things before.”

Turing paused, lowering her head. “Understood.”

“B-but that doesn’t mean she didn’t, either!” Twilight added quickly, waving her hoof. “Who knows? Maybe she did!”

“I see.” Turing returned to her seat. “You do not want me to experience significant disappointment if she was unable to construct them. I understand.”

Twilight nodded. “Right. But I’m sure whatever she has planned, it’ll be great anyway. And you can tell her all about the things that have happened lately. Like feeling affection! I know she’ll be amazed by that!”

“Indeed.” Turing’s ears squeaked on their hinges. “Twilight Sparkle, do you believe that Gadget will be disturbed by my recent actions?”

Biting her lip and sucking in a deep breath, Twilight paused to consider that question. “Honestly, Turing… maybe.” Then she stood up and put her hoof on Turing’s shoulder. “But it’s okay. Gadget’s a nice young mare and I know she’ll understand once she hears the whole story. Honestly, we don’t need to tell her everything, if you don’t want to.”

Turing looked down for a moment. Then, slowly, she raised her head again. “No. I would like her to be informed of my actions. My other friends are aware of them and it would be dishonest to conceal them from Gadget. I believe you are correct in your assumption that she will understand.”

“Good.” Twilight glanced out the window at the countryside as they passed by it. They were traveling through the hills which were covered with trees with leaves that were starting to turn. There was a nagging thought in the back of her mind and she hadn’t had to courage to ask about it thus far, but now was as good a time as any.

“Turing Test,” she began, “I… I hate to ask about this, but you know how you copied Grace’s power and, um…”

“Yes. It is all right, Twilight Sparkle. I have come to accept my actions. You may inquire about them.”

“Well, it’s not that, exactly.” She sighed. “Since you copied Grace’s ability… I mean, if you ever were in another situation… like that...” Twilight trailed off, unsure how to articulate the question.

“You wish to know if I would ever use Grace’s mind-altering power again.”

Twilight sat up, not expecting Turing to understand what she was getting at. “Ah. Well, yes.” She swallowed. “I mean, I trust you to use that power responsibly--”

“Forgive me for interrupting, Twilight Sparkle,” she said, raising a hoof, “but there is no reason for concern. I have deleted the data necessary to replicate that ability from my memory. I will not be able to use it in the future.”

Twilight let a sigh of relief escape her. “Whew. I have to say, Turing, I am kind of glad to hear that.”

“Of course. Should I ever be co-opted by others, such an ability would be detrimental to those around me. I wished to prevent such an outcome.”

Twilight nodded. “All right then.”

“However,” Turing added suddenly, startling Twilight, “I do have one remaining concern: as part of your order that I make my own choice, I uninstalled the Three Laws from my default programming. You have not reinstated them. This means that I am now without any limitation on my behavior other than your direct orders as my end user. Do you wish for me to reactivate those protocols?”

Twilight frowned and shook her head. “I only gave those to you back when you were first activated as a precaution. I had no idea that in a matter of weeks you’d become mature enough to make better decisions, let alone that those laws would backfire. I mean, I, Automaton, the book they appeared in, was all about problems with those laws; I only used them as a quick fix, but it’s my fault for not adjusting them sooner.”

“Understood. However, I still believe it would be in everypony’s best interest if some sort of failsafe were installed. Do you have a suggestion?”

“Turing…” Twilight groaned. “After all we went through, really?”

“I understand that you may not see a need, Twilight Sparkle,” Turing replied, “but the possibility exists that I may still malfunction or miscalculate in some way that could endanger others. A preventive protocol embedded into my default programming may become necessary.”

“Well…” She clicked her tongue, folding her forelegs as she thought it over, even closing her eyes. After a few moments, she sighed and shook her head. “I’m sorry, but every idea I have, I keep thinking about how it could be exploited and used against you. I can’t just tell you not to harm anypony, or else we’re back to the same problem. I can’t tell you to be nice to everypony, because sometimes you just can’t be nice. I can’t tell you to do ‘the right thing’ because that’s not so easy to define either. I mean, what would you suggest?”

Turing’s eyes contracted again. “I am unable to determine a suitable protocol.”

“Then I guess, until we can think of one, I’d rather have no hard rule than a bad one.”

“Understood. However, in the interest of my friends’ well-being, I will continue to consider suitable protocols to replace the Three Laws and report to you when one has been determined.”

“That sounds fine.” She smiled. “You know what, Turing? We’ve got time and this is your first daytime train ride. Go ahead and look out the windows if you want to. Just try to keep the noise down, okay?”

Turing nodded. “Acknowledged.”

Immediately, she went back to the window, staring outside at the passing hills and valleys, at the pastures and farms, and the tiny villages on the way to Manehattan. Twilight went back to her own book, smiling at the tiny sounds of the servos in her eyes and neck as she tried her best to take it all in.

***

Stepping off the train and onto the platform was simple enough. At least, that was what Twilight thought.

Then she realized that everypony on the platform had turned to stare at the unusual sight of not just a robot, but also a Princess of Equestria suddenly standing right before them.

“Oh my goodness, is that Princess Twilight?!”

“And hey, she brought one of the Royal Guard with her!”

“Dat ain’t a Guard, dat ting’s eyes are glowin’!”

“Hey, Paulie, get a loada this thing over here!”

Twilight waved politely and managed to dodge the onlookers and autograph seekers as she led Turing Test into the cavernous lobby of Grand Central Depot. The hard marble floor, the high, arching ceilings, and cathedral-like windows made the place seem, in some ways, even more regal than her own castle. Although it was crowded, the sheer number of busy passengers and workers rushing about to catch one train or get out of the Depot to catch a taxi, along with the sheer size of the place, actually made it easier for Twilight and Turing Test to blend in. They still received stares and some slowed their pace only to blindly smack into the ponies stalled directly ahead, but mostly the pair of them managed to make it to the exit without incident.

But suddenly a towering figure jumped into Twilight’s way.

“Princess Twilight!” a voice bellowed.

Twilight gasped and leaped back, startled by the sudden figure blocking her. She collided with Turing Test and the pair of them craned their necks to see who it was.

“Oh!” Twilight cried, her startled expression giving way to a smile. “Mr. Vanderbull, it’s you!”

“Indeed. My apologies for my brusqueness, but you almost walked right by me,” the graying minotaur said, bowing. He was wearing his usual waistcoat and held a golden pocket watch in one hand. “It seems your train was several minutes late. My apologies.”

“Oh no, not at all!” Twilight exclaimed, waving her hooves. “The train was fine! What’s a few minutes, give or take?” She laughed nervously, but Vanderbull still wore an expression of annoyance.

“I give my employees strict instructions to stick to their timetable. Deviations are not something I take lightly.” He sighed, letting his stiff shoulders drop. “But no matter. I shan’t bore you with the details of the railway business.” He deposited his watch back in his pocket, then turned his attention from Twilight to look at Turing. “Ah, and here is your automaton companion.”

“Robot.”

Vanderbull raised an eyebrow. “I beg your pardon?”

Twilight glared back at Turing Test. “Turing, don’t be rude! Mr. Vanderbull helped repair you, after all!”

“I do not comprehend your meaning. Have I said something inappropriate?”

Twilight grew more agitated, but she paused as Vanderbull chuckled.

“I remember now. ‘Robot.’ That is the term you prefer, correct?”

“Affirmative.” Turing stepped toward Vanderbull and offered him her hoof. “However, Twilight Sparkle’s comment has reminded me that I have not properly expressed my gratitude for your assistance in repairing me. Thank you.”

Vanderbull’s eyes lit up and he took Turing Test’s hoof. “My my! It seems you have developed your social graces!” He sighed and rolled his eyes as he stood back up. “If only I could say the same of my assistant.”

Twilight cocked her head. “Huh? You mean Gadget?”

Vanderbull nodded, beckoning the pair to follow him. “That girl obtained my permission to spend the day with you and even enlisted my help in obtaining-- ah, that is,” he feigned a cough, averting his eyes, “--well, in obtaining something for you.”

Twilight flashed a grin and glanced at Turing, shivering with giddy anticipation. “Ooh, it looks like Gadget really does have something cool planned for us!”

Vanderbull chuckled. “Well, I don’t know what you’re expecting, but just the same, I believe you’ll enjoy it. Still, I couldn’t believe she would invite you all the way to Manehattan and then not take the time to pick you up at the station! Thus, I decided to greet you myself.”

Once outside, they saw parked among the many taxis a large black carriage with a stylish golden “V” symbol on the door. The carriage was being pulled by two massive white stallions in matching white suits, and narrow sunglasses. The two looked to Twilight and Turing with a synchronous nod, almost like mirror images of one another.

Vanderbull opened the door and invited the pair in. “Well then… shall we go find my assistant?”

Twilight stepped forward, but noticed that Turing Test had paused on the sidewalk. She was taking in the numerous carriages and taxis zipping by and craning her neck to see the towering buildings all around her.

“Amazing. These buildings are far larger than those in Ponyville. Some are even taller than your castle, Twilight Sparkle.”

Twilight smiled and waited for Turing to notice that they were about to leave. When Turing came alongside her, she leaned in closer. “I’m glad you’re interested in what Manehattan has to offer, Turing. I’ll just bet this town has all sorts of surprises in store for us today!”

***

Vanderbull Industries was a massive edifice on the outskirts of Manehattan; a broad, rectangular building ten stories tall. Looming white statues of mythological figures and towering columns lined the stairs leading up to the main entrance. Twilight and Turing followed Vanderbull into the lobby where the secretary and nearby workers all greeted their boss warmly as well as bowing to Twilight once they spotted her.

However, rather than taking the elevators, they travelled through a series of hallways and found themselves going out the back of the building and across a grassy courtyard behind the building. Just ahead of them was a row of long, tall buildings with arching roofs.

“Our hangars are where we conduct some of our more hazardous experiments,” Vanderbull explained. “Gadget will be in Hangar 2. She’s running some experiments on engines and, should one malfunction, there should be no damage to the main laboratories.”

“Damage?” Twilight asked, narrowing her eyes.

“Nothing to worry about. I’m sure Gadget has taken proper safety precautions.”

As they approached the massive wooden door, Twilight sniffed the air. The scent of smoke was heavy in the air. She noticed that Vanderbull’s eyes had widened, and then they quickly narrowed as he took on a sour look.

Vanderbull opened the door and they walked inside. The long hangar was lined with bits of machinery and pipes and the windows near the roof had all been opened. And yet a cloud of black smoke was collecting in the arched ceiling, barely seeping through the open windows. A loud rumbling and metallic rattling sounded throughout the area. In the center of the long hangar, surrounded by various other parts, Gadget was furiously moving about, her four mechanical arms each occupied with a separate task. A pair of protective goggles were over her eyes.

“Come on, come on, I just know you can do more!” she shouted. She pulled a lever and the rumbling grew in pitch and volume.

As they got closer, they saw at the center of the area was a loud, rumbling contraption. Several metal cylinders rose and fell rapidly from the top of it. A tube connected to it made repeated sucking sounds while another was connected to a glass tank with a pale yellow translucent liquid inside it. From the back of it, a pipe ran to a tube-shaped chimney that belched out smoke. This roaring machine was obviously the cause of all the noise and the smell.

Connected to the contraption were several wires that ran to three other machines, apparently powering them. There was a sewing machine, a drill, and a massive wheel placed on a treadmill. Gadget flew from one to the other, her arms making adjustments and trying to keep all the machines operating. Her arms kept pulling levers and tightening valves and she made measurement after measurement on a clipboard she held in one hoof, the pencil in her mouth.

The machine backfired and large burst of smoke blasted out from the chimney.

Twilight covered her nose and Vanderbull made a face.

“Gadget!” Vanderbull called.

The girl didn’t seem to notice them at all over the din of the machines working in conjunction. “Yeeesss,” she cried, taking a reading from one of the meters, her grin widening. “Yes, yes, this is fantastic!” She began to laugh deliriously. “Amazing!” She began to write down the number.

“Gadget!” Vanderbull bellowed.

“Huh?!” Gadget turned around, the pencil dropping from her mouth. “Oh! Just a minute, sir!”

She was barely audible over the noise, but she whirled around and yanked a long lever, causing the loud contraption at the center to sputter and finally fall silent. She waved a hoof, coughing as it gave one last sputter of smoke. She smiled and pulled off her goggles, replacing them with the glasses she kept in her coat.

“Twilight! Turing Test! You’re here!” She smiled broadly and glanced up at Mr. Vanderbull, only to have her smile fade when she saw him cross his arms and glower down at her. She gulped. “S-something wrong, sir?”

“When you informed me that you would be running experiments this morning,” he said, “leaving Her Highness and Turing Test to make their own way here, I excused it, thoughtless as your scheduling was. But you did not inform me that you would be doing more work with that monstrosity!” He looked at the engine at the center of the room, wrinkling his nose.

She gulped, dusting black soot from her cream-colored fur. “B-but sir, I just wanted to check the maximum power output of the combustion engine for comparison--”

“And I informed you that I would not permit further experimentation with it unless you had my express permission!”

“Well, yes, but this was the only time--”

“Enough!” he shouted, his voice echoing throughout the hangar. Gadget fell silent, lowering her head. Twilight and Turing Test stood by, watching this exchange unfold in silence. Twilight cringed, her eyes darting back and forth between the minotaur and his protegee.

Vanderbull let out a long sigh, rubbing the bridge of his nose. “We’ll discuss this later. For now,” he said, managing a smile, “I believe that it is time for you to play host to our honored guests.”

He nodded to Twilight and Turing Test, bowing once as he excused himself. Despite his disapproving glare a moment earlier, he still managed a quick smile at Gadget, who returned it before he left.

“Well, um… sorry about all that, Twilight, Turing,” Gadget said, rubbing the back of her neck as she looked away. “He’s right though. I should have been more patient, but I had the hangar reserved just this one day and-- well, never mind. Let me take you to my own laboratory.” She started to walk forward, motioning for them to follow.

“Hey, hold on a moment,” Twilight said, holding up a hoof to stop her. Gadget cocked her head to the side, but then Twilight smiled and put a foreleg around her, giving her a quick hug. “It’s good to see you again, Gadget.”

Gadget relaxed, allowing herself a more genuine smile. “Yes. I’m glad you’re both here.” Then she gave a leap in the air, kicking her legs in excitement. “And I can’t wait to show you what I’ve got in store for you today!”

***

Gadget opened the door and ran ahead of them, spreading her forelegs and mechanical arms wide in greeting. “Ta-da!” she hollered.

“Wow.”

“Impressive.”

Gadget’s workshop was just as cluttered as Twilight had expected it to be. The papers, the sketches on chalkboards, and of course the whole galaxy of spare parts all over the tables throughout the large room - exactly in keeping with the image Twilight had of a mind that just couldn’t stay focused. And on that note…

“Say, um, Gadget,” Twilight began, clearing her throat as she stepped into the room, “I don’t want to pry, but what just happened? What were you doing and why was Mr. Vanderbull so upset?”

“Ah. Right.” She looked away, pulling her bulky black jacket around her, then glanced around before her eyes fell on a piece of paper nearby. She snatched it up in one mechanical hand and held it up before Twilight and Turing. “Check this out!”

Twilight squinted as she peered at it. “That looks like that thing you were working on back in the hangar.”

“I concur,” Turing said. “There are several key differences, however.”

“Exactly!” Gadget cried. “Well, you see, what I was working on was a brand new internal combustion engine. It runs on gasoline!”

Twilight’s eyes widened. “Gasoline? Isn’t that a by-product of kerosene production?”

“Correct! I figured you’d know about that sort of thing, Princess Twilight!” Gadget pointed at the picture. “It works by combustion of small puffs of gasoline and oxygen to drive the pistons, which in turn produce power. I’ve been running experiments to see how it compares with a Westinghorse steam engine, and it really packs a wallop!”

Twilight nodded, though Turing only cocked her head.

“You are attempting to construct a power source? For what purpose?”

“For any purpose!” Gadget exclaimed, her grin growing ever wider. “Most Equestrian technology runs off of unicorn magic or good old-fashioned hoof power. But lots of ponies across Equestria are trying to design power sources that don’t run on magic at all! We already have steam engines, hydroelectricity, and chemical batteries, but gasoline engines are cheap and easy enough to build!”

“Maybe so,” Twilight said slowly, making a face as she did so, “but they sure produce a lot of smoke.”

“Yeah… that’s a problem.” She sighed. “They’re powerful, but they also cause pollution, but then so does burning the wood or coal to make the steam engines work. I mean, I admit I’m intrigued by the technology, but it all has a lot of drawbacks. The reason I’m running experiments, though, is to figure out just how powerful it can be. Whatever is going to be the next dominant technology, it has to be more powerful and relatively inexpensive and hopefully a heck of a lot cleaner.”

“Well, then why is Mr. Vanderbull upset?”

Gadget rolled her eyes. “Mr. Vanderbull is competing with a big shot oil pony named Rockefoaler. He has a deal with us to ship his crude oil, but he keeps trying to renegotiate for a better deal. And we need his business, so right now we’re kind of dependent on each other. But if these engines take off, gasoline will be even bigger than kerosene was even before the electric light started spreading. And trains… well, they might stop being the dominant way to get across the country. And even if they don’t, we hear they’re building gasoline or diesel-powered trains. Rockefoaler could run us right over.

“So, as a result, Mr. Vanderbull doesn’t want any of his engineers working with gasoline. He’s worried word will get out and we’ll look like we’re secretly supporting the technology too. He wants us to come up with something better.”

Turing tapped her own chest. “I do not operate on steam power or gasoline. Could my power source be a suitable replacement?”

Gadget smiled, but heaved a sigh. “Unfortunately, no, Turing. It’s a nice thought, but your battery is a magically-enhanced industrial chemical battery. A really powerful and efficient one, granted, but it’s nothing we don’t already know about. The problem is that they’re really expensive and time-consuming to produce. We can’t mass-market something like that.”

Twilight smiled. “It sounds like you’re really working hard to bring technology to everypony.”

“I am!” Her excitement grew and she nodded so hard that she actually had to stop to adjust her glasses as they slid down her nose. “My mechanical limbs run off my earth pony magic and they work great, but it took over a year of doing nothing but designing, building, re-building, repairing, and the like to get them right, and then I had to personally train to use my earth pony magic that way. Imagine if I could develop a cheap and easy power source to make more artificial prostheses like them! Ponies with missing limbs could walk again! Earth ponies and pegasi could manipulate objects just as easily as unicorns! Who knows, we could build artificial wings to give everypony the chance to fly! We could give one pony the strength and dexterity of ten!

“Oh,” she moaned, falling back breathlessly onto her haunches, “sweet Celestia, it would be glorious.”

Twilight cleared her throat, causing Gadget to sit up straight, blushing and hiding her face behind her messy brown mane. “Oh. S-sorry. I get carried away sometimes.”

Twilight shook her head. “I think it’s great you’re doing all these experiments for the ponies of Equestria, Gadget. We need more scientists like you.”

“Th-thank you, Twilight.” Gadget’s blush deepened. Then she got to her hooves, her tight grin reappearing. “But,” she said, wiggling her eyebrows, “that’s not all I’ve been working on!”

She motioned for them to follow to a table that had been covered with a sheet. With a loud cry and much fanfare from her mechanical arms, she pulled the sheet away to reveal…

“Oh!” Twilight exclaimed. She held her smile in place for as long as she could, but finally said, “Um… what is it?”

The table had several wires and a series of shapes made out of a silvery, thin metallic material. It obviously wasn’t a machine and the shapes were of varying size and shape. Twilight was no stranger to scientific endeavors, but this was another instance where she felt out of her league.

Turing, in contrast, took one look at the items on the table and immediately put together what they were.

“Twilight Sparkle, the shapes of this material correspond to the shape and dimensions of the components of my outer hull.” She turned to Gadget, her ears moving on their hinges. “Have you constructed these as some form of internal lining?”

“Yes!” Gadget exclaimed, clapping her hooves together. “Turing Test, if you’re willing, I can finally construct a Faraday Cage! The wires will redirect electrical shocks around your vital systems and this mu-metal foil will shield you from electromagnetic interference! You’ll never have to worry about lightning strikes again!”

Twilight gasped and turned to smile at Turing Test. The robot’s eyes had contracted and her ears had straightened again. “Oh. Oh, Gadget.”

To Gadget’s surprise, Turing suddenly shot forward and embraced her. “That is wonderful. Now I will never risk being damaged by lightning and resetting to my default again. Thank you.”

Gadget’s eyes were wide and they shifted from Turing to Twilight. “Um… wow, Turing, did you get friendlier?”

Twilight covered her mouth with one hoof as she chuckled. “She recently gained the ability to feel affection. I think she’s still dealing with it.”

Gadget gasped. “Oh wow! You’re kidding!”

“Ah.” Turing released Gadget and stepped back, lowering her head slightly. “My apologies. Have I acted inappropriately again?”

Gadget smiled back at her before shaking her head. “No, it’s okay. I just… I’m really happy for you, Turing.” She seized her hoof between her own. “Now, this won’t take too long, so let’s start now!”

“Acknowledged. How shall we begin?”

Gadget’s limbs all rose into the air, their metallic fingers wiggling eagerly. The light reflecting off her glasses appeared to make her eyes pure white. “First of all,” she said with a high-pitched, erratic giggle, “let me strip that hull off you!”

***

The taxi pulled up to a stop by the jeweler’s, allowing Turing to exit, followed by Gadget (no longer wearing the Point Dexter), who tossed a few bits to the cabbie. Twilight was still sitting in the cab, her eyes unfocused and staring off into space.

“Um, Twilight?” Gadget asked. “We’re here.”

“Huh? Oh… yeah.” Twilight slowly exited the cab, letting the cabbie run off to find his next customers. She still had the same far-off gaze and merely stood there for a few more moments as Gadget and Turing Test looked on.

“Twilight Sparkle, do you require a reboot?”

Gadget snickered. “I think she’s still a little disturbed about seeing you without your hull.”

Twilight snapped back to reality. “Th-that’s not it!” she stammered, her cheeks reddening. “Well, I mean… can you blame me? I’m used to seeing you as a pony, Turing, not… like that.”

Twilight had volunteered to help Gadget with the Faraday Cage, but seeing Turing Test without her hull was a sudden reminder of just how unlike organic ponies she really was. Seeing her exposed chassis, the inner workings of her servos and gears and the mess of her wires hanging out, not to mention the long braided strand of coils that formed her mane and tail running the length of her body… it was all a little overwhelming.

Not to mention seeing her without her cranial and face plates was especially bizarre: Turing’s “eyes” were amethyst lenses, true, but Twilight hadn’t realized that they were actually much larger than what she typically saw glowing through her visor. They were massive and round, like praying mantis eyes. And though Twilight knew that Turing did not really have a mouth, seeing the round, pulsing speaker that the robot used to make her vocalizations was not something Twilight was prepared for.

“Iyaa, Twilight-sama,” Turing moaned, throwing her foreleg against her forehead dramatically, “now that you have seen me like that, I will never be able to get married.”

Gadget burst out laughing as Twilight let out a loud groan.

“Oh for pony’s sake, Turing,” Twilight said. “I knew I shouldn’t have let you read Gadget’s imported Neighponese comics while we were welding the mu-metal to your hull.”

Gadget held out her hoof and Turing hoof-bumped it. “Don’t mind her, Turing. I think your developing sense of humor is awesome.”

“Acknowledged. Ha ha.”

“Let’s just get Turing those brooches,” Twilight said, walking right past them. Just the same, Gadget noticed the hint of a smile on her face as she took the lead.

The trio entered the jeweler’s and the pony behind the counter - a gray unicorn stallion with a white mane - looked up from the gem he was examining. “Ah!” he cried, a broad smile coming to his face. He removed the eyepiece he was wearing and came around the counter to greet them. “Princess Twilight! And your companions, correct?”

“Yes, that’s right,” Twilight said. “This is Gadget and my robot friend here is Turing Test.”

“Yes, well, when Miss Rarity spoke to me and described the recipient of her gift,” he said, looking Turing Test up and down, “I wasn’t really certain what she was getting at. But it seems she didn’t exaggerate in the slightest. Well then, ah… Turing Test, is it?”

Turing nodded her head. “Affirmative.”

“Well,” he said, laughing nervously, “I must admit this is unusual, but as one of the finest jewelers in all of Manehattan, we pride ourselves on customer satisfaction! Here, allow me.”

The jeweler went into the back and brought out a flat white box. He lifted the top with his magic and the trio of mares peered inside.

“Oh, wow!” Gadget cried.

“Turing, those are gorgeous!” Twilight added.

Turing’s eyes shifted as she looked them over. The pair of brooches were rhombus-shaped amethyst stones laid in gold. They glinted in the light and seemed to pick up the light glowing from Turing’s own amethyst eyes.

“I lack the ability to make reliable aesthetic judgments. However, they are cut very efficiently and their symmetry is within 0.0005% of each other. Based on my knowledge of what ponies find visually pleasing and my companions’ reactions, I believe that they are satisfactory.”

“Well… good!” the jeweler said, smiling uncomfortably. “We’ve made preparations and can have them attached to you in the back room, if you like. The only question is where you’d like them placed.”

“Based on earlier statements made by Rarity, the optimal placement would appear to be on my forelegs. Is that acceptable?”

The jeweler’s smile became more relaxed and he nodded. “Of course, madam. Please, if you’ll come with me.”

“We’ll wait here, Turing,” Twilight said. “We’d like to see them once they’re finished!”

“Understood.” She turned to the jeweler. “Let us proceed.”

Twilight and Gadget sat on a pair of seats in the front of the jeweler’s as they watched Turing follow into the back room.

Gadget chuckled to herself.

“Hm?” Twilight murmured, glancing over at her. “What’s so funny?”

Gadget turned to her, a warm smile on her face. “She’s really… well, if she were a normal pony, I’d say she seems more ‘grown up.’”

“Ah.” Twilight looked at the open doorway hearing the muted voices from the back room, Turing’s included. “Yes. She really is. Things were really rough for a while. I honestly wasn’t sure what I was going to do for a while. But you really helped me out the last time you came to visit. I think having friends and giving her the chance to make more are what kept her from falling apart.”

Gadget raised an eyebrow. “What do you mean?”

“I… well, I guess now might be a good time to let you know what happened. Turing said it would be okay to tell you.” She took a deep breath and, as briefly as she could, related the whole thing to Gadget, including the events at the Castle of the Two Sisters and then Turing Test’s talk with Fluttershy.

“Oh.” Gadget scrunched inward, hugging herself at the conclusion of the tale. “Poor Turing Test.”

“She was worried, you know,” Twilight said quietly, putting her hoof on Gadget’s shoulder. “Turing thought it was important to tell you the truth, but she thought you might be a little disturbed at what she did.”

“Huh?” Gadget blinked several times before giving Twilight a sideways glance. “Why would I be? She did what she had to do to protect her friends!”

“I agree, but Turing Test… well…”

Gadget nodded her head slowly, apparently understanding. “Well, it’s too bad that it happened, but… I mean, even if she’s the first machine to feel hatred, she’s also the first machine to really care about her friends too. I’d say the latter totally outweighs the former.”

Twilight smiled and put her hoof around Gadget’s shoulder. “She’s lucky to have you as a friend, Gadget.”

Gadget blushed. “N-no. I’m the lucky one. A princess and the world’s smartest machine call me their friends. I don’t see how I could ask for anything more.”

There was some commotion and the jeweler swept back into the room, his chin raised and a proud smile on his face.

“We’re finished!” he exclaimed. He swept his hoof back at the door. “And voila!”

Turing Test came through the door, her legs whirring until she came to a stop. Gadget and Twilight rose to their hooves.

“The procedure is complete.” She raised her left foreleg, displaying the brooch which was now attached to her shin. It gleamed in the light and reflected a purple sparkle on the floor and nearby walls.

“Oh,” Twilight whispered. “Oh wow, Turing.”

“What is your opinion, my friends? Am I… pretty?”

Gadget giggled, but Twilight, tears in her eyes, came over and hugged her. “You’re very pretty Turing Test,” she managed to whisper. “I’m sure everyone in Ponyville is going to love it.”

***

The three of them stood before the building before them. The complex was in a separate block surrounded by a grassy lawn and with curving buildings and a latticed glass roof. The name of the building was proclaimed in tall letters over the entrance: “MANEHATTAN HALL OF SCIENCE.”

Twilight’s eyes gleamed and her mouth dropped open into a broad, joyous smile. “Oh my gosh, this is the finest science museum in all of Manehattan! Gadget, was this the other surprise you mentioned?”

Gadget looked away, a smug look on her face. “Well… actually, that’s just part of it.”

Twilight and Turing Test exchanged a glance.

“Do you mean that your surprise involves this museum?” Turing asked. “Perhaps that there is something within that you wish to show us?”

“Exactly!” She winked and beckoned them to follow her up the stairs. “You see, this place has a lot of permanent exhibits, but they also do special exhibits every few months. And I caught wind of one that was coming up due to a friend of Mr. Vanderbull’s! He told me about it and I got the idea to invite you both to come see it!” She reached inside her jacket and removed three tickets. “Today, we get to take a private, guided tour before anypony else gets a chance!”

Twilight practically squealed with anticipation as they reached the entrance. “Okay, I have to know! What’s the exhibit?”

Gadget bit her lip. “Ohhh, I was going to wait until we got inside, but I just can’t wait!” She held the tickets out to Twilight and Turing. Twilight lifted one with her magic and read the title printed on it.

The Automaton: History of the Mechanical Pony

Twilight gasped. “Oh… oh my gosh!” Then she gave a loud holler, her wings spreading as she did a loop in the air. “This is fantastic!”

Turing Test continued to stare at the ticket. “Gadget, Twilight Sparkle: I do not understand. What is the significance of this exhibit?”

“Oh, well, I guess you’ve never been to a museum, then, right?” Gadget motioned for them both to go inside as she began to explain. “You see, Turing, a museum is a place that displays all sorts of beautiful and interesting things for ponies to see and learn about them. And this one has an exhibit about automata! In fact, this is going to be the largest collection of working and recreated automata in all of Equestria!” She turned around and seized Turing’s shoulders as they entered the lobby. “Don’t you see, Turing? You’ll get to learn all about your ancestors!”

Turing stared back, her ears twitching slightly. “My… ancestors?”

Twilight, still shivering with excitement, dashed across the lobby toward the front desk. “Just stay there, you two! I’ll see if we can get a tour guide!”

She made her way around several other visitors, but then skidded to a halt on the marble floor when she saw a pair of Royal Guardsponies standing before the front desk. Instantly, the pair of them stood in her path, heads lowered and eyes aflame, protecting whoever was standing at the desk.

“Oh!” Twilight exclaimed.

The two Guards widened their eyes and then bowed to her. “Our apologies, Princess Twilight,” said one.

“We did not realize you would be visiting the museum on this day as well,” said the other.

Twilight’s mouth moved but no words came out. Then a new voice was heard from behind the guards: “What’s that? Twilight Sparkle is here as well?!”

The two Guards parted, making a path for the speaker. A flash of blue and a shimmering, starry mane came into view.

“Ah ha! It is you, Twilight Sparkle!” Princess Luna stood before her, smiling serenely. “It seems that you and I will be tourmates on this day!”

Twilight gawked. “T-tourmates?”

Luna nodded, raising a hoof (and her voice) to loudly proclaim: “Come! Let us learn of these mechanical wonders together!”

To be continued...

Author's Notes:

Can you believe that it has been 5 years of MLP as of this posting? Or, also of note, 25 chapters of this story! Are you excited, because I'm excited, and I bet Luna's excited to be in the story at long last, too! Right, Luna?

Yeah, she's excited.

Not much in terms of references, but...

-In addition to other Gilded Age historical references mentioned from earlier, the Westinghorse engine is a reference to the Westinghouse engine, a steam engine developed by industrialist George Westinghouse, an earlier backer of the great Nikola Tesla, in the late 1800s.

-Less a reference than a little touch: in Gadget's letter, she spells neighborhood as "neighbourhood," connecting to the fact that she's from Vanhoover, and thus has Canadian spelling.

-And of course, the title of this arc references another Daft Punk song.

See you next time! Buy the ticket, take the ride!

P.S. The ending of another story I've written takes place in the same museum as this chapter. It's there if and only if you are so inclined.

Prime Time of Your Life, Part 2

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Gadget looked up from a brochure she’d picked up in the lobby when Turing Test tapped on her shoulder.

“Hm?” She glanced up, smiling at the robot. “What is it, Turing?”

“Twilight Sparkle is returning. She is being accompanied by another alicorn.”

Gadget slowly turned and her eyes went wide, jaw dropping open, as she saw that Twilight was indeed coming back across the atrium of the museum. Behind her, a full head taller, a starry mane flowing elegantly behind, was…

“P-Princess Luna!” Immediately, Gadget bowed as low as she could and so abruptly that she actually hit her chin on the floor. “T-Turing Test, bow!”

“Understood.” Turing assumed the same position.

“Arise, Gadgette Giroux,” Luna said as she and Twilight arrived.

Oh my gosh she knows my name, oh gosh oh gosh! Outwardly, Gadget only managed to slowly rise back to her hooves on wobbly legs, her knees practically knocking together, a tight grin on her face as she struggled to not hyperventilate, her eyes fixated on the Princess.

Twilight chuckled slightly at Gadget’s obvious star-struck state. “Um, Luna, this is Gadgette, but everyone calls her ‘Gadget,’” she said, gesturing to her with one hoof.

“I see.” Luna smiled. “Twilight Sparkle has told us-- er, has told me that you are a mechanist working with my sister’s acquaintance, Mr. Vanderbull.”

Gadget’s pupils constricted and her throat felt dry. “Gggkkkkkt!” she replied.

Luna raised an eyebrow. “Ah… are you all right?”

“She’s just a little shy,” Twilight said, going to Gadget’s side. She leaned closer and whispered into Gadget’s ear, “Gadget, Princess Luna is really nice. She’s also very sensitive because she had a lot of trouble getting used to things after she was changed back from being Nightmare Moon and being gone for a thousand years. Please try to calm down.”

Gadget swallowed and gave short nod. “Y-yes, that’s right, Your Majesty.” She took a deep breath. “I’m… an engineer. I build machines for Mr. Vanderbull.”

Luna’s smile grew. “Then you should be excellent company on the tour today!” she exclaimed. “I would love to learn more about the incredible devices that have been constructed in my absence.”

“Oh, that’s great!” Gadget said, raising her head proudly. She actually placed a hoof on her chest, forgetting all her anxiety from just a moment earlier. “You see, I happen to be an expert in all kinds of machines, power sources, and other…” She trailed off, her eyes widening again. “Wait. ‘Tour?’ You mean…”

“Yes,” Twilight said, smiling up at Luna. “Princess Luna will be coming with us on the tour.”

From the look of wide-eyed shock she wore, Gadget looked like she was somewhere between jumping for joy or having a massive heart attack. Fortunately, she was saved, this time by Luna herself.

“Please, consider yourself my companion alongside Twilight Sparkle. I would greatly appreciate your help in understanding the things we will see today. Can I count on you?”

“O-oh!” Gadget nodded emphatically. “Yes! Yes, of course, Your Majesty!”

Luna put her hoof on Gadget’s shoulder. “Please, let us do away with such titles. ‘Luna’ will be fine.”

Gadget managed to nod through her smile. “Umm… okay, ‘Luna.’” Inwardly, she was practically shrieking Oh my goodness… How did I get on a first name basis with two different princesses?

Twilight breathed a sigh of relief as the tension between the two seemed to have been resolved, but then she looked down and saw that Turing Test was still in bowing position on the floor.

“Um, Turing? You can stop bowing now.”

“Acknowledged.” Turing arose and Luna seemed to notice her for the first time.

“Uh, Luna, this is--”

“Ah ha! The automaton my sister mentioned!” Luna bounded over, a huge grin on her face. The two Royal Guardsponies nearby came close, eyes fixated on Turing Test.

“Wait, you mean Celestia… she talked to you about Turing?”

“Yes!” Luna said, walking circles around Turing Test. “She mentioned that you had some sort of artificial pony in your care, but until this moment I hadn’t fathomed what she truly meant!”

“Greetings, Princess Luna. I am Turing Test.”

“And it speaks!” Luna, with all the bright-eyed giddiness of a mere foal, began to examine Turing, lifting the robot’s legs and tail before running her hooves along their surface, even tapping on her metal exterior.

Watching this invasive treatment of her friend, Twilight couldn’t help but wince in discomfort. “Um… Luna…”

“It is all right, Twilight Sparkle,” Turing said before she could finish. “Her apparent awe of me is unexpected. Most ponies only stare at me or avoid me altogether. She shows no apparent fear or discomfort.”

Luna tilted her head at that, momentarily turning away from one of the coils of Turing’s mane that she’d been examining. “Fear? Why would I fear you, Contraption?” She then resumed her smile and lifted Turing’s right foreleg. “This is remarkable! Truly remarkable!” She turned back to Twilight and Gadget. “How does it work?”

Gadget actually had a hard time keeping herself from laughing and Twilight actually nudged her when she heard her start to snicker.

“Normally, Gadget could tell you, Luna,” Twilight replied, “but you could just as easily ask Turing Test herself.”

“Oh?” She pursed her lips before slowly turning back to look at Turing. “Yes… I suppose I could. Contraption, can you understand me?”

“Affirmative.”

Luna rubbed her chin. “So… I see you are able to understand and form speech. Tell me, can you answer any question?”

“No. Only questions that I have knowledge about.”

Luna jerked her head back and then began to laugh. “I see! Of course!” She cleared her throat. “Well then, please tell me how you are able to function.”

“That question would normally require a lot of explanation. However, experience has taught me that ponies often require a brief outline, rather than a detailed explanation, of complex matters. Simply put, I am powered by a chemical battery. The electricity it produces allows the numerous servo motors in my system to enable movement among other functions. I have modified cameras that scan my environment which function as my eyes and a complex series of systems which allow me to emulate the abilities of the three main types of ponies, excluding alicorns. All major and minor operations are controlled by my central processing unit. It is also connected to my memory and cognitive functions.”

Luna scrunched her face up. “I’m afraid I don’t think I understand all of that, but I am familiar enough with the new invention of electricity to understand that somehow it animates you.”

“Correct.”

Luna smiled. “Then I have understood at least that much. But tell me, how is it that you are able to think and speak, Contraption? Do you have some manner of brain?”

Gadget cleared her throat. “Actually, Pri-- er, Luna, nopony knows exactly how or why Turing is so smart.” She came alongside her robotic friend, pointing to Turing’s head. “Those things she mentioned, her central processing unit, her memory, and her cognitive function, are all stored inside a compartment in her head. In a way, those three things work like a ‘brain,’ more or less.”

Luna slowly nodded. “And… this is all… mechanical?”

“Yes, that’s right!” Gadget smiled at that, but then narrowed her eyes, rubbing her chin. “The trouble is, the compartment they’re in is locked up tight and we don’t know how to access it without damaging the whole thing. So the truth is that we don’t actually know how it works yet.”

“I see.” Luna leaned in more closely. “Tell me, Contraption, do--”

“Turing Test.”

Luna stopped. “I beg your pardon?”

“I do not mean to show disrespect, Princess Luna, but I do have some emotions, and I have a more positive response to my name. I request that you call me Turing Test, or simply ‘Turing,’ as my friends do.”

Luna’s jaw worked on its own without making a sound for a few moments and Twilight stepped forward, afraid that Turing had inadvertently insulted Luna. But then Luna began to laugh and she turned toward Twilight.

“My sister told me only the barest details of this machine pony, but it-- but she is a wondrous creation! I see, as usual, Twilight, that you keep interesting company. Strange, but interesting.” Luna then turned back to Turing Test. “Very well. If your friends call you ‘Turing,’ then so shall I. And you may likewise address me as simply ‘Luna.’”

Turing nodded. “Acknowledged. I am glad to make your acquaintance, Luna.”

Twilight relaxed, letting out the deep breath she’d been holding in.

“Still,” Luna went on, looking around at all the different hallways leading to different displays, “even with all I have seen since my return, I have never seen machine ponies like yourself, Turing. Are there others like you?”

Turing Test’s ears shifted, squeaking on their hinges. She glanced over at one of the tickets Gadget had in her jacket’s pocket, reading the title again: The Automaton: History of the Mechanical Pony.

“Possibly,” she replied at last. “I would like to know the answer as well.”

***

Back across town inside Vanderbull Industries, a lone donkey wearing a khaki jumpsuit and cap made his way down the hall in the Engineering wing. He pulled a janitor’s trolley with him loaded up with bottles of cleaning fluid, a bucket, and a mop. He stopped at a door that read Gadgette F. Giroux - Executive Assistant/Engineer. He took a key ring from his belt and inserted it into the locked door.

“Uh, excuse me, what are you doing?”

The donkey looked up at the gray unicorn stallion galloping over to him.

“What’s it look like, mac?” the donkey replied. “I’m fixin’ ta clean out this here room.”

The unicorn furrowed his brow. “Uh, cleaning day isn’t until Wednesday for the Engineering department. Are you new?”

The donkey raised his ears. “The hay?! I’ve been here for almost a year!” He pointed to the nametag on his uniform, which said his name was Burrojangles. “You sayin’ you don’t know me? One o’ us janitors is the same as another? Or maybe,” he added, raising an eyebrow and giving him a sideways glance, “just all us donkeys look the same?”

The unicorn shifted his eyes and he began to sweat. “N-no, I… look, um, that still doesn’t explain what you’re doing! Miss Gadget’s one of the top engineers around here and nopony’s supposed to go in there unless--”

“Awright, awright,” the donkey said, waving a hoof before placing the keys back on his belt. “Mr. Vanderbull said he wanted this place tidied up, but I guess I can just tell ‘im one o’ his workers made me leave. Ain’t my problem, mac.”

The unicorn froze. “Oh, uh, well…”

“What did ya say ya name was again?”

The unicorn began to back away. “I’m sorry, sir, I didn’t know that it was Mr. Vanderbull himself who called for this! I guess in that case…”

The donkey grumbled, rolling his eyes. “Ohhh, so glad I got ya permission, Mr. Fancy Shmancy!”

“Actually, Fancy Shmancy works downstairs. I’m Flip Switch--”

“Whatever, just lemme get back to work over here.” The donkey unlocked the door as the unicorn, Flip Switch, scampered off. Once he was in, he closed and locked the door behind him. Smiling to himself, he reached into a compartment on the trolley and drew out a camera.

“Well then,” he mumbled to himself, “time to get to work.”

***

Twilight galloped back to the group as they waited at the entrance to the new exhibit, the entrance cordoned off with a velvet rope.

“Sorry to keep you waiting!” Twilight exclaimed. “I wanted to check out the Anthropology exhibit before we started. It’s so real to me! There was this exhibit of two ancient ponies’ bones from 50,000 years ago! It was like getting a glimpse of my own ancestry!”

The others began talking about it until they heard the fluttering of wings. From down the hallway a pegasus came into view. She landed in front of them, just ahead of the velvet rope.

“So sorry to keep you waiting!” she said, bowing her head. “We wanted to make sure absolutely everything was perfect for our honored guests today!” She lifted her head and smiled brightly. “My name is Blue Blazer and I will be your tour guide through this exhibit! I hope you will find all this as interesting as I do!”

Blue Blazer was pink, but in fact was wearing a bright blue blazer and a matching round pillbox hat atop her chocolate brown mane. Her eyes were brown as well and around her neck she wore a silken scarf tied into an elegant bow. On her flank was the image of a Q next to an A.

“It’s nice to meet you, Blue Blazer,” Twilight said, stepping forward, “my name is--”

Blue Blazer held up a hoof. “Oh, but of course I know who you are! All of you!” She cleared her throat and gestured to them all, one-by-one. “Her Royal Highness Princess Twilight Sparkle, Her Royal Highness Princess Luna,” she began, and then walked over to Gadget, who gasped as Blue Blazer took up her hoof in both of hers, shaking it. “And then there’s you, Gadget: Mr. Vanderbull’s prize assistant and one of his most promising engineers! It is a distinct pleasure to have such an elite scientific mind in our midst!”

Gadget blushed profusely, hiding her face as she turned away. “P-please, I’m nothing special.”

“Oh, pshaw!” Blue Blazer scoffed, rolling her eyes. “Your paper in Scientific Equestrian, ‘Magitech Prostheses Adapted for Everyday Use?’ Buh-rill-ia~ant!”

“Wait, you were published in Scientific Equestrian?!” Twilight exclaimed.

“Y-yeah, not long after I put together the first version of the Point Dexter.” She took a breath and her blush began to fade. “It was just a little something I wrote to show some data from my experiments with using earth pony magic to power devices. Granted, it’s hard to adapt it for other ponies, since I only experimented on myself…” She trailed off, seeing Luna pouting and scrunching her face, clearly not following what they were talking about.

“Oh! I, uh, I built a bunch of mechanical arms that I can control using my earth pony magic, Princess Luna,” Gadget explained.

“Really!” She smiled. “How incredible!”

Blue Blazer at last turned to Turing Test. “Well, last of all we have Princess Twilight’s own personal experiment in Friendship, the famous automaton Turing Test!”

“Robot.”

Blue Blazer’s eyes went wide, but then, curiously, she put a hoof over her mouth and stifled a laugh. “Oh my. You’re calling yourself a ‘robot?’”

Turing tilted her head. “Is that word amusing to you? I did not intend to be humorous.”

“Let’s just say you might learn some interesting information on this tour. But then, I suppose that’s the idea!” Blue Blazer looked Turing Test up and down, heaving a sigh. “You are even more impressive in person, though. The machines you’ll see in here can’t compare to you, I’m afraid, but perhaps you’ll learn more about your own kind.”

Turing nodded. “That is my intention.”

“In that case,” Blue Blazer said, unhooking the velvet rope and clearing the path for them, “let us begin!”

Luna lingered for a moment, turning to the two Royal Guards.

“You may wait here,” she said. “I would like to enjoy this exhibit on my own with my companions.”

“Yes, Your Majesty!” they both said, saluting her immediately. The both took up stationary positions at the entrance as Luna caught up to the group.

Blue Blazer led them down the hallway and they entered the domed chamber at the entrance to the exhibit. The almost total silence was broken by their collective gasps.

“Wow…” Gadget managed to whisper.

The domed room was filled with numerous mechanical ponies. One was a porcelain figure of a mare with painted lips and glass eyes and a silken gown. Another was like a bronze statue with large joints in its legs and neck and blue polished sapphires for eyes. Still another was a skeletal structure with dozens of interlocking gears housed inside the steel bands of its rib cage. And yet another was of a colt in a sitting position with a Pan flute in his hooves.

“Just… just look at all these!” Twilight exclaimed.

“Understood. I am observing,” Turing replied, walking over to the skeletal automaton.

“Oh, but wait!” said Blue Blazer, wiggling her eyebrows. “There’s more! You see, these automata are at the entrance because, once the exhibit is open to the public, they will be welcoming our guests in style!” She went to the wall, where there was a large lever and pulled the switch. The hum of electricity was heard and then, slowly, all the automata began to move.

The porcelain figure bowed her head and began to dance on a circular platform below her, rotating elegantly like a ballerina. The bronze figure’s sapphire eyes glowed blue and it began pawing and stomping at the ground as puffs of steam blasted from its nostrils. The skeletal pony sat down on its haunches and then lay down before once again standing back up, repeating this motion again and again. And the colt raised the pan flute to his lips and began to play a slow, simple tune on it, moving the various tubes of it side-to-side.

As the four of them stared on in awe, Luna suddenly let out a cry and sank to her haunches, covering her mouth as her eyes began to tear up.

“Luna!” Twilight exclaimed, rushing over.

“My goodness…” Luna was whispering. “To think that the ponies of Equestria… that they were able to create such wonders! What other things have I missed in my absence?!”

“Luna, it’s all right,” Twilight said, putting her hoof on Luna’s shoulder. “Don’t worry. This is all new to me too.” She smiled as Luna looked down at her. “We’ll learn about all this together.”

“Y-yes,” she said, getting to her hooves, blushing slightly when she saw that Gadget, Turing, and Blue Blazer were all looking to her. “My apologies. I was simply overwhelmed.”

Gadget pursed her lips and looked at the skeletal figure that was continually laying down and rising back to its hooves. “These machines… most of these weren’t electrical, were they?”

“Correct!” Blue Blazer exclaimed. “We modified them to run on electricity so they wouldn’t need to have their inner clockwork wound.” She gestured for them all to gather around.

“These are all examples of display automata, meaning they were intended purely for ornamental reasons,” she began. “Here we have examples from many different places and times. The Flute Player was commissioned by a Canterlot noble for his wife’s garden 120 years ago. The Dancer was a Maretanian invention placed outside the Grand Duchy’s Great Concert Hall 50 years ago and only recently was acquired for our collection. That unnamed bronze stallion over there once belonged to a Saddle Arabian prince, though we aren’t sure of its date. And the clockwork stallion that is lying down and standing was a construction by Silver Swan in the Golden Age of Automata, about 100 years ago.”

Princess Luna raised her hoof, and both Gadget and Twilight noted that she looked like an inquisitive schoolfilly. “Tell me, what magic was it that animates these mechanisms?”

Blue Blazer waved her hoof. “No magic at all, Your Highness. While some automata are Magitech in nature, utilizing various enchantments or direct stimulation of magical energies, these four are completely mechanical in nature.”

“Astounding,” Luna whispered.

“Well then, if you’ll follow me, we’ll pass by a few other minor displays on our way to the Ancient Automata wing.”

The group continued forward, stopping periodically to look at the smaller displays lining the hallway as Twilight came up next to Luna. “Luna, I was wondering… you never did explain what you’re doing here. Is it just curiosity while you’re in Manehattan?”

Luna shook her head. “No, it is not mere curiosity, though I am curious. In fact, it has more to do with the Cont-- with Turing Test.” At the sound of her name, Turing lifted her ears and looked to Luna. She chuckled to herself. “So lifelike,” she murmured.

“Um…”

“Oh, yes, of course,” Luna said, turning back to Twilight. “My sister apparently did not initially think to tell me about this miraculous discovery until what happened with those two criminals.”

“Grace and Glory?” Twilight asked.

“Indeed. My sister was quite disturbed by those recent events. She told me of the existence of an artificial pony and tried her best to explain it to me, but I confess I did not truly understand what she meant. It seems even Canterlot University and even the Royal Archives are lacking in information on the subject. However, word came to my sister that this museum would be holding a special exhibit and I acquired a ticket to come see for myself and become better educated on the subject at my sister’s behest.” This caused Twilight and Blue Blazer to both raise an eyebrow, though Luna went on obliviously. “And it seems I am quite fortunate to have my sister’s prized former pupil, an expert on the subject, and the automaton in question to accompany me!”

“Robot.”

“Ah, yes.” She mouthed the word silently to herself before repeating it. “Ro-bot. Such an odd word.”

“Forgive me, Your Highness,” Blue Blazer said, her expression somewhat darker than before, “but did you say your sister, Princess Celestia, suggested your visit?”

Luna tilted her head. “Yes. Why do you ask?”

“Well… um… it’s…”

Twilight stepped forward, putting herself between Blue Blazer and Luna. “To tell the truth, Luna, Celestia hasn’t really been very fond of automata until recently. Although she seems to be warming up to Turing Test ever since what happened.”

Both Luna and Blue Blazer were startled by this.

“Is that so?” Luna looked down. “She seemed quite supportive.”

“I can’t hardly believe it either,” Blue Blazer said, rubbing her chin. “Cele-- er, Her Highness went out of her way to suggest that we replace this exhibit! Honestly, with her history--”

“History?” Luna asked. “What do you mean?”

Blue Blazer swallowed. “It’s just… she has actively opposed the technology in the past. It’s actually part of the exhibit later.” She slowly turned her head and stared at Turing Test, who stared right back. “What exactly happened? And how did you get Princess Celestia to, ah, ‘warm up’ to you?”

Turing Test looked around, noticing that all eyes were on her. “I believe what happened is mostly a confidential matter. However, my actions demonstrated my devotion to my friends and my willingness to sacrifice myself for them. I believe Princess Celestia became convinced that I intended no harm against Twilight Sparkle or the ponies of Equestria. Does that satisfy your inquiry, Blue Blazer?”

“I… I see. Hm.” She shook her head then raised it, her smile back in place. “Well, never mind all that for now. Let’s take a look at the Ancient Automata display!”

They proceeded to the next room. This one was far larger and was lit with orange and yellow lights along the wall, giving the place a strange, almost eerie ambience. Numerous other automata were again on pedestals or glass display cases.

“In this room you’ll find the remnants of ancient automata from before the Equestrian Era and up to the banishment of Night--” Blue Blazer caught herself just as Luna raised an eyebrow, subtly glancing her way.

“Er, from a long time ago! Eheheh… Well, anyway, please look around at your leisure. I’ll be right here if anypony has any questions!”

Luna rolled her eyes and the group began to split up, looking at all the various displays around them.

Gadget stopped by a rusty chunk of metal with gears sticking out of it while Luna began to examine the figure of a pony in an elegant silk harness around her head and muzzle. Turing stuck close to Twilight.

“These really are incredible, aren’t they, Turing Test?” Twilight asked, examining a suit of armor, which, according to the sign nearby it, was based on a design by Leoneighdo da Vantasso.

“Do you believe so, Twilight Sparkle? They do not seem so impressive to me so far.”

Twilight raised her head. “What do you mean? That ponies were able to construct such things so long ago is actually pretty impressive, don’t you think?”

“The technology available at the time would have made the construction of such machines difficult, but it is clear that they still managed to do so. However, these machines often serve only one function and in many cases, serve no function at all. They are inferior.”

Twilight blinked for a moment, then her lips curved up into a smirk. “Turing, just because you’re much more advanced than these machines doesn’t mean you can’t appreciate the effort that went into making them.”

“I do not understand. Please explain what you mean.”

“Well, it’s like I said before we started,” Twilight said, leading Turing to the next exhibit as she looked over it. “When I went to look at the display of ancient ponies, I could appreciate all the amazing things they did to struggle and survive. Those ponies couldn’t use magic or read or write or even talk! They had to wander the fields of what would later become huge cities and vast farmland while foraging for food and avoiding predators. But they did survive, and they grew and changed, and adapted, and eventually they had families that had families of their own, and eventually it all led to us!

“History is important, Turing. Even if these machines are primitive and simplistic compared to you, you should appreciate it a little. After all, if the technology of those eras hadn’t been refined and perfected, then ponies wouldn’t have been able to build you. You wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for them!”

Turing was silent for a moment, but then bowed her head. “You are correct, Twilight Sparkle. I will be more appreciative.” She leaned in close to the automaton before her and in a lowered voice, her head bent slightly, she whispered two simple words. “Thank you.”

Twilight chuckled. “Come on, Turing, let’s check out the next one!”

“I am coming, Twilight Sparkle,” she replied, and followed her friend.

Gadget was still looking over the rusty device as Blue Blazer came up to her.

“You’re certainly interested in that rusty old thing,” Blue Blazer said. “Do you have any questions?”

Gadget was quiet for a moment, humming to herself as she peered at it. “This was a portion of the Andrividan Mechanism, wasn’t it?” she asked, turning to Blue Blazer with a smile.

Blue Blazer’s eyes went wide. “Oh my! You’re right! We had taken down the sign after noticing an error on it, but you managed to identify it all on your own?!”

Gadget polished a hoof on her chest, examining it smugly. “I did a lot of research on automata even before I joined Mr. Vanderbull’s company. It was used to track the stars and predict eclipses along the pre-Equestrian Telestial system, back before Eclipses were scheduled and they had two respective teams for the Sun and Moon raising. They wouldn’t have clocks like this until the early Equestrian era!”

“Exactly!” Blue Blazer nodded appreciatively. “I must say… with you here, I almost feel superfluous.”

Gadget blushed. “Oh, no, not at all!” she said, waving her hooves. “I mean, I know my stuff, but you’re the guide here! I can keep quiet--”

“You should never be afraid to show your knowledge, Gadget,” Blue Blazer said, smiling at her. “If you want to contribute to anything I have to say, please feel free.”

Gadget breathed a sigh of relief.

“Blue Blazer!” Luna called, stopping by a boat that was filled with several automata holding musical instruments. “What is this massive thing? Could these machines actually play music?”

Blue Blazer sighed, but patiently went over to her. “Yes, Your Majesty. These were constructed by the great Saddle Arabian engineer, Ismare Al-Jazari. A tank of water would slowly empty onto a crank which would turn an intricate series of pegs on wheels which would cause the automata to play the instruments. This is a reconstruction based on her designs, of course.”

“I heard that this was actually programmable,” Gadget said, coming over. “They could switch out the pegs to play different songs, right?”

Blue Blazer nodded. “That’s right!”

“Could it play a song now?” Luna asked, her face lighting up.

“Ah… I’m sorry, Your Majesty, but I’m afraid not. We do not have a water tank installed and it’s not entirely reconstructed anyway.”

“Oh.” Luna lowered her ears. “A pity. I do so enjoy Saddle Arabian music.”

“Everypony!” Twilight called, getting their attention. “Come look at this!”

They went to where she and Turing were looking up at a huge stone tablet on a slanted display under a glass case. The ancient tablet was covered with arcane writing and faded paintings of ponies in strange clothing, all of it etched into the stone. In the very center was a circle with an image of a huge pony with segmented limbs and several other smaller ponies fleeing from it.

“What’s this?” Twilight asked, turning to Gadget and Blue Blazer.

Gadget peered at it. “I have no idea,” she breathed.

“Nor do I,” Luna said. “This writing predates even the old script used in the days before my banishment. I do not recognize it.”

“Well, this is one of the most ancient artifacts,” Blue Blazer said, stepping before them. She pointed at the figure in the center. “This thing in the center is believed to be something called a ‘golem.’ This tablet may have been carved by the ancient tribes of the Yudacorns, a semi-nomadic tribe from the Far East, about 2000 years ago.

“The Yudacorns were, as their name would suggest, a tribe of unicorns. According to the legends, they were able to construct massive automata out of stone or clay and animate them using some kind of arcane magic. They called them golems and they could be made to do all sorts of things. This particular tablet tells of a golem which was made to protect the Yudacorns from their enemies. It was so strong that it could not be stopped, and so intelligent that it began to question its role as a slave, which made the ponies who created it afraid that would turn on them. The story ends with the Yudacorns destroying it and all other golems, declaring that it was unnatural to give life to something which had no soul.”

Twilight winced and looked over to Turing Test. But if this bothered Turing, she did not show it. Instead, her robotic companion only looked more closely at the tablet before stepping toward Blue Blazer.

“Can you verify this story as accurate, Blue Blazer?”

Blue Blazer shook her head, even chuckling a little. “Oh my, no. This is only a legend. The idea that they could create such machines so long ago? And even now, there is no such magic like the kind described. It couldn’t possibly exist!”

Twilight breathed a sigh of relief. “Yes, that’s true. I’ve studied magic for almost all of my life, and even the best animation spells are only to give the illusion of independent motion. Making a machine that could think for itself like that with nothing but magic would be impossible!”

Turing nodded. “Understood. It is a curious thing how ponies often tell stories that are untrue with no indication of this.”

Blue Blazer shrugged her shoulders. “Well, shall we proceed to the next part of the exhibit?”

***

Flip Switch was walking down the hall on his way to the commissary for a late lunch when he spotted Vanderbull looking over some files one of the railroad managers was showing him. Raising his head and puffing out his chest, he put on his best professional smile.

“Good afternoon, Commodore!” he said, slowing his pace as he approached.

Vanderbull raised his eyes slightly and gave a short smile and nod before returning his gaze to the files.

Undaunted, Flip Switch stopped, intending to interject himself into their conversation. “I see you got someone to finally clean up your assistant’s messy little workshop, eh sir?”

Vanderbull was barely listening at first, but then what Flip Switch said registered and he finally raised his head. “I beg your pardon?”

“Oh, just saying,” Flip Switch began, feeling sweat forming on his brow. The massive minotaur was imposing enough as it were without him also being his boss. “I mean, last time I was in Gadget’s workshop it was pretty messy. I’m sure a little tidying up--”

“You must be mistaken,” he said, creasing his brow. “It isn’t cleaning day. And you know I never deviate from my set schedules.”

“B-but that donkey janitor Burrojangles said you asked him to clean it, so I let him carry on!”

Vanderbull froze, slowly passing the documents back to the railroad manager. “Excuse me a moment,” he whispered to him. Straightening his jacket, he stepped close - uncomfortably close - to Flip Switch. “Flip Switch, isn’t it?”

Flip Switch’s ears lifted. “Yes, sir! I--”

“I actually knew for certain. I make it a point to know the names of everypony in this building, right down to the custodial staff. I not only made no such request for a cleaning of my most valued employee’s workspace, but I also have never hired a donkey named ‘Burrojangles.’ And you let him into Gadget’s workshop.”

Flip Switch’s eyes went wide and he shrank as Vanderbull glowered down at him, blotting out the light and now appearing as little more than a towering horned shadow. “Oh.”

“Now listen to me very carefully,” he whispered, his deep, raspy voice like the sound of thunder from a distant storm. “You are going to go downstairs immediately. You will tell the security guards that they are to lock down the building and stand guard at every door. No one is to enter or leave. You will do this and hope to Celestia that this interloper does not slip by, because if he does…” and here Vanderbull exhaled a puff of air that blew back Flip Switch’s mane “...I will see to it you not only never work in the railroad business again, but that you will forever travel across Equestria on hoof.”

Flip Switch managed to get out a nod and the barest whimper as he galloped down the hallway, shoving other ponies out of the way to get to the elevator.

Meanwhile, Vanderbull ran off in the other direction, heading for the stairs to get up to Gadget’s workshop. He tossed his jacket and tie aside, rolling up his sleeves. If this ‘Burrojangles’ character was still there, he was about to find out what happened when you angered the wrong minotaur.

To be continued...

Author's Notes:

This one was a short one, and you might have noticed the lack of a sketch. The reason is that the chapter I was working on was getting too large, so I chose to split it. The sketch Green was working on is in the "second half" of this chapter.

Anyway, time for another round of Spot That Reference! Spoiler tags as usual for players at home.

-Burrojangles is a combination of "burro," the Spanish word for donkey, and the figure in the old country music song "Mr. Bojangles." Fittingly, the name was a pseudonym.

-The exhibit Twilight mentions going to see connects this story to another of mine, "Running Free Across the Plain." Just a subtle bonus to say thank you to those who've read both stories. Thank you!

-Technically, the exhibit shouldn't have been called "Anthro"pology, as that term is about humans, not ponies, but if it hadn't been then how would I have worked in Twilight's line "It's so real to me!" referencing the famous fandom song "Anthropology" by Awkward Marina which was itself based on the fic by the same name by Jason the Human?

-Easy one. Scientific Equestrian references Scientific American, a well-known scientific journal.

-Numerous inventors and automata are based on real world examples. This arc actually required a lot of research, so I hope I got all the details right! Most notably we've got Ismare Al-Jazari, based on the real ancient automaton builder Ismail Al-Jazari, an Arabian inventor who really did create a "robot band" powered by water.

-The "Yudacorns" is a play on the words combining the old pronunciation for the Jewish people and, of course, "unicorn." The tale of the Golem is based off old Hebrew folk tales about just such a thing.

-The Andrividan Mechanism is a reference to the real-life Antikythera Mechanism, an amazingly sophisticated bit of machinery that existed 100-150 BCE and would not be matched for over a thousand years until the 14th century CE. Pretty interesting stuff, actually.

See you next chapter, folks!

Edit: Also, have a bonus unused sketch Green did for this chapter, but ended up being scrapped. I still think it's cute, but it just didn't fit anywhere and wasn't done before the chapter was.

Prime Time of Your Life, Part 3

View Online

The next part of the exhibit, as it turned out, was a long, wide hall completely filled with automata of all shapes and sizes. As amazing as the previous exhibits had been, the sheer variety of machines in this room left them stunned once again.

“Welcome to the Main Hall of the exhibit!” Blue Blazer cried dramatically, standing on her hind legs as she spread her forelegs wide with glee. “In here we have a collection of more recent automata, stretching over the whole of the Equestrian period, including many from the most recent Golden Age of Automata started by Henriette Marellardet! Enjoy!”

The group dispersed, eagerly examining the fascinating machines.

“Blue Blazer!” Luna called. “Is this true? Could this automaton truly play chess?”

Blue Blazer walked over and saw Luna had placed herself before a tall, realistic-looking automaton with a moustache and a turban on his head. Before him was a chessboard, the pieces all set and ready to play a game.

“I’m afraid this is actually not a true automaton, Your Highness.” Blue Blazer stood on the other side of the thing, peering over its shoulder. “This is called, simply, the ‘Saddle Arabian’. It appeared to be able to play chess very well, but in actuality, the machine was moved by the inventor’s son, a natural chess prodigy, who hid in this compartment below the board.” Blue Blazer flipped a switch on the pedestal below the chessboard and revealed the empty compartment.

“A ruse?” Luna frowned. “How terrible that somepony would deceive others like that!”

“Perhaps so,” Blue Blazer said, glancing over at Turing Test, who was still following Twilight, “but it inspired others who wondered how it worked to think up new ways to make a ‘thinking’ machine. Even though this automaton couldn’t really beat other ponies at chess, it seems somepony was successful at making a smarter automaton.”

Twilight and Turing stopped by an automaton with a button nearby it. The automaton had a head like a young stallion, but the rest of his body was only a wire frame. Visible on its insides were numerous gears and below it was a large spool-like object with what looked like many flat gears. Before it was a writing desk with a fountain pen in a holder and a blank sheet of paper. Curious, Twilight pressed the button.

With several clicks and whirrs, the pony lowered its head, taking the pen in its mouth, and it began to write something on the paper.

“Oh, cool! Is that one of Marellardet’s?” Gadget asked, rushing over.

“Indeed so,” Blue Blazer said, coming over. “This automaton can produce any of four different drawings and three different poems. We think this one is right at about 100 years of age. The cams inside it allow it a wide range of movement and it has the largest ‘memory’ of its kind!”

“Incredible!” Twilight cried, peering down at the paper. “I can’t believe she was able to build this so long ago!”

Turing raised her hoof, getting Blue Blazer’s attention. “I have an inquiry, Blue Blazer.”

“Hm? Yes, what is it?” She smiled at the mechanical mare.

“Can any of these machines speak?”

Blue Blazer cocked her head. “Uh, well, some of them can sing notes or play instruments--”

“Perhaps I should be more specific. Do any of these automata display the capability to produce and comprehend speech as I do? Are any of these automata like me?”

Blue Blazer heaved a sigh. “No, I’m afraid not. None of them are as advanced as you are. You are a work of unparalleled genius. None of these other automata can compare to you.”

Turing was quiet for a moment, but then said “Understood.”

“Turing…” Twilight began.

“It is all right, Twilight Sparkle,” Turing said. “Blue Blazer did state as much earlier. I was merely curious to what degree I compared with my predecessors in this museum.”

“Wellll,” Blue Blazer said, rubbing her chin, “there are some that definitely resemble you in some fashion. For example, would you like to meet the original ‘robots?’”

Turing raised her head. “Please clarify: I was told these machines were classified as ‘automata.’ I believed I was the only one to identify as a ‘robot.’”

Blue Blazer grinned and beckoned for the group to follow her. “Take a look at these then, everypony.”

The group stopped and saw a series of mannequins. Two were frightened looking ponies, while the others were of ponies that were wearing outlandish-looking silver masks and silvery suits.

“How strange,” Luna said, narrowing her eyes. “This looks like the scene of some garish play.”

“Correct, Your Highness!” Blue Blazer exclaimed.

“Oh!” Gadget said, her eyes going wide. “Then these aren’t machines at all? Then why are they here?”

“These are original costumes used in the play Rossaddle’s Universal Robots.”

Turing’s head immediately swivelled over to look at Blue Blazer, her attention squarely on her.

“The play was about a group of artificial ponies that eventually overthrew their creators.”

“That is a common theme in organic literature,” Turing said. She turned slightly to Twilight. “Perhaps I could write a book. It would be about a robot like myself who was accepted by ponies and everything was pleasant and no bad things or major conflicts ever occurred.”

Twilight made a face. “Sounds fascinating.”

“Sarcasm detected.”

Twilight ignored that and directed their attention back to Blue Blazer. “But what’s the significance of this? And why the term ‘robot’ when ‘automaton’ was so common?”

“Because this was the first work of fiction to depict such artificial creatures as the fully functional, but independent, servants of ponykind,” Blue Blazer said with a wry grin. “You see, it was written by a pony across the sea in another language. And in his language, the word ‘robot’ doesn’t mean a machine pony like you, Turing Test. The word means ‘slave.’”

The group gasped. Turing’s eyes contracted and her ears twitched asymmetrically. After a moment, she replied only with “Understood.” She turned her attention back to the frozen scene before them, saying nothing else.

Twilight glanced over at Luna and Gadget, subtly darting her eyes over at Turing and giving a slight jerk of her head in Turing’s direction.

“Ah! I think I will examine this other automaton across the room!” Luna proclaimed, hurriedly turning away.

Gadget wore a forced smile, slowly retreating. “Yes, I, um… yeah, I also will do that!”

Blue Blazer trotted away after her as Twilight came up next to Turing Test.

“Uh, Turing… are you okay?”

“I am all right, Twilight Sparkle. However, if you are expressing concern, there is no need to worry. Blue Blazer’s information was unexpected, but I have no emotional reaction to it.”

“I, um… well, good for you.” She sighed. “I wish I could say the same.”

Turing glanced at her. “I do not understand why this seems to distress you.” She tapped her chin, producing the usual ringing sound. “Does this have something to do with our previous conversation after my inquiry ‘Is it correct to say that Turing Test is a slave?’”

Twilight drew in a deep breath. “I’d almost forgotten about it until now.”

“My inquiry was based on my misunderstanding of Spike the Dragon’s position. However, your response was ‘Um… no, that’s not exactly correct either.’ Since then, I have accepted that you do not consider me a slave. You do not force me to do labor and you respect me as an entity. It is true that you are my end user and thus may order me to do whatever you wish…”

Twilight opened her mouth, intending to comment on that, but Turing did not notice as she carried on.

“...however, I identify you as my friend, my mentor, and my caretaker. The term ‘slave’ is therefore unfitting.”

Twilight smiled and put her foreleg around Turing. “It is.” She turned back to the “robots” that stood before them. “So… do you want to stop calling yourself a ‘robot,’ now that you know what it means?”

“Negative.”

Twilight blinked. “Huh? Why not?”

“I selected the term because it was applied to characters in Button Mash’s comic book. They resembled me as they were capable of independent action and decision making. The robots here may have inspired the writer of the comic, but they are also independently functional and it seems that the playwright also depicted them as asserting their own dominance over organics. Although I do not wish to harm anypony, this is still an example of machines asserting their will.”

Twilight furrowed her brow, but then her eyes lit up. “Oh! You mean you like the term ‘robot’ because you associate it with machines with a mind of their own!”

“Affirmative. And additionally,” she said, turning to look Twilight in the eye, “it was one of my first choices. I prefer the term because it was the term I chose for myself.”

Twilight chuckled. “I can’t argue with that. ‘Robot’ it is!”

With that, the two moved on to the next display.

A short distance away, Gadget was looking at a porcelain mare dressed in an elegant floral patterned silk robe of some kind.

“This… is this from Neighpon?” Gadget asked breathlessly.

“Indeed so, Miss Gadget!” Blue Blazer laughed. “This is a tea-serving automaton, or, as they call it over there, ‘karakuri ningyo.’ It works with a wound spring and several cams and levers. If you add the water, it will boil it, pour it, wheel itself into a room along a track, and serve the tea.”

“Amazing… I hear they love automata over in Neighpon!”

“Yes,” Blue Blazer sighed, “but the machines are all mainly built just for entertainment. If you ask me, it would be much nicer to see this technology grow a little more.”

“Totally!” Gadget said, nodding emphatically.

“Though, again, judging by Turing Test, somepony might have already cracked the problem.” She leaned in, lowering her voice. “Just out of curiosity, have you all figured out who built her?”

Gadget bit her lip. “I, um… well, I’ve been doing research on it, but I can’t really share my findings,” she whispered. “Sorry. It’s classified.”

Blue Blazer nodded solemnly. “Of course. My apologies.” Then she looked back over her shoulder at Turing Test. “Still… she is a marvel of technology. Wouldn’t you love to meet the ponies who built her and find out how they did it?”

Gadget heaved a sigh and pushed her glasses up along her muzzle. “Absolutely. I’d also want to know what they built her for and why they sent her to look for Twilight, though.”

“Hm,” Blue Blazer murmured. “Not knowing something, having that technology right in front of you and being denied the answer… I don’t know about you, but I find it more than a little frustrating.”

Gadget made a sour face. “I’m with you there.”

“Gadget, Blue Blazer, Princess Luna,” Turing called, waving to them all. “We have found something of particular interest.”

They walked over and saw that Turing and Twilight had found a mechanical pony attached to a plow. It stood in a small rectangular pen filled with sand. Its steel shell shone dully in the lights of the exhibit, a patina of rust spots here and there adding to a sense of great age. Large bolts dominated the joints, and an open back allowed several long, thin tubes, almost like light bulbs, to protrude from its depths.

Luna peered at it. “Hm… I do not see what makes this so special. It seems less ornate than the others. And why does it have a plow attached to it?”

“An analysis of its structure shows many similarities to my own,” Turing replied. “This may have inspired the ponies who constructed me. Additionally, the bulbs on its back appear to be capable of converting unicorn magic to electrical energy. I utilize a similar structure to recharge my battery in the event of not being near a generator.”

“Exactly!” Blue Blazer said. “Pardon me, Princess Luna, but would you oblige and cast some magic onto the device?”

Luna glanced at the bulbs and then, horn glowing, cast a bolt of magic onto them. The automaton slowly began to move, its legs making a groaning, high-pitched squeak as it took its first steps. Creaking and rattling, the gears and wires inside it began to work in unison to push it forward. It gained momentum and started to pull the plow. When it reached the end of the sand, it turned itself around and plowed a second row. They noted that it was doing so in perfectly spaced intervals.

Luna’s eyes lit up. “Ah ha! Now I see your interest in this!”

Gadget closed her eyes, thinking carefully. Then she opened them and turned to Blue Blazer. “Does this work similarly to the writing automaton we saw earlier?” she asked. “Something that lets you program the size and area of the field so it knows when to turn around?”

“Exactly!” Blue Blazer said. “My my, Gadget, you truly do have a gift for this!”

“I agree,” Luna said. “I am fortunate to have such an informative guide as you, Blue Blazer, and tour-mate as you, Gadget.” She bowed to Gadget, who pulled her jacket up around her face, hiding it.

“There is one further point of interest, according to Twilight Sparkle,” Turing said, drawing their attention.

Twilight glanced up at Luna, squirming uncomfortably. As the others looked to her expectantly, she took a deep breath. “A while back, Princess Celestia told me that she once encountered an inventor who built a farming automaton. Unless I’m mistaken, this is that automaton. And, well…”

Luna was looking at her, a smile upon her face. Twilight swallowed, starting to regret bringing this to everypony’s attention. Unfortunately, it seemed that she’d already gone beyond the point of no return.

“She was worried that it would replace all the farm ponies whose jobs depended on plowing and tending the land. And so, she… she…”

“Allow me, Your Highness,” Blue Blazer said, bowing to Twilight. “Her Highness, Princess Celestia, spoke out against the technology, refusing to sponsor it and casting a negative light on all those who would have sponsored it. The inventor of this automaton had to close his business and scrap his machines, save for a few he kept on his own farm. His family donated this old relic after hearing of this exhibit, hoping that others would hear of how his dreams were crushed under Celestia’s hoof--”

“‘Tis a lie!” Luna shouted, stomping her hoof. The others all looked to her in shock. Luna’s wings were flared and her teeth were grit. “My sister would never idly crush the dreams of one of her subjects! If what you say is true, then Celestia only did so because it was the right thing for Equestria!”

And then, curiously, Blue Blazer stood her ground and merely smiled. “You know, we have estimated that this could have cut the amount of time spent plowing for the average farmer by at least a third and up to fifty percent. The time and labor saved would have allowed such a farmer to invest his or her time in other things, growing other crops, and saving on labor expenses to farmhooves who themselves could have been doing other jobs. We missed out on a hundred years of a more boisterous economy because your sister was focused on the short term instead of looking past her muzzle--”

Blue Blazer stopped as she felt a hoof land firmly on her shoulder. She froze and turned to Gadget, who had a tense look on her face and was shaking her head. Blue Blazer looked to Luna and gulped when she saw that the Princess of the Night was glaring at her, nostrils flaring as she seethed.

“Ah.” Blue Blazer bowed low. “My apologies, Your Highness.” She raised her gaze slightly. “I’ve spoken out of turn.”

Luna opened her mouth to say something, but then noticed the strained expressions on everypony else’s faces and managed to calm herself. Placing a hoof on her chest, she waited for her heart rate to slow before speaking.

“It is all right, Blue Blazer,” she said. Looking away, she added, “I was not aware that such things had passed during my absence. My sister was once obsessed with improving the technology of Equestria. It seems after a millennium, she has changed. I will have to discuss this with her.”

The group lapsed into silence, the heavy feeling after the conflict dissipating slowly. Then there was the sound of a ringing bell and the final creak of the automaton’s limbs as it finished plowing the little makeshift “field.”

“The automaton has completed its objective,” Turing observed. “The bell must be an indicator to signal completion. It is a simple design, but it is also effective.” She looked to Twilight. “It is difficult to explain, but I feel as though I share the strongest kinship with this machine than the others we have seen. It may be the design. Or it may be that it seems the most functionally useful automaton: it serves a purpose for the ponies of Equestria beyond merely being aesthetically pleasing.”

They all smiled at that, relaxing a bit at the robotic mare’s observations.

“However, unlike the farming automaton, I am both functional and aesthetically pleasing.” She raised her foreleg, indicating the amethyst brooch on it. “I could plow the fields of Equestria and look fabulous while doing so.”

Twilight rolled her eyes as the others chuckled. “I see that quick visit with Rarity before we left for Manehattan rubbed off on you, Turing.”

Blue Blazer clapped her hooves together, getting their attention. “Well, there is one last thing you might want to see, everypony,” she said. “At the end of this hall is a small theater where you can see a movie documenting our restoration efforts on some of these very automata you’ve seen today!”

“Ooh!” Twilight said, her eyes sparkling. “That sounds ama--”

“One moment,” Luna said, suddenly looking like a giddy little filly as a smile came to her face. “A movie? I have heard about these strange moving pictures but I haven’t had the time to view one for myself! You mean you have one right here in this very museum?”

“Er, well, yes,” Blue Blazer replied, keeping her smile in place.

“Luna, I have also never seen a ‘movie,’” Turing remarked.

“Then come, my mechanical companion!” Luna exclaimed, raising a hoof decisively. “We shall experience the wonders of the moving picture for the first time together!”

Luna and Turing began to gallop toward the small theater at the end of the hall. Twilight rolled her eyes again, following the two of them.

“Uh, Princess Twilight,” Blue Blazer called, “could you go on ahead of me? Just press the button on the wall inside the theater and the film will automatically start.” Then she put a hoof on Gadget’s shoulder. “I’d actually like Gadget to stay a moment so I could talk to her about some things, if that’s all right.”

Twilight and Gadget exchanged glances and Gadget shrugged her shoulders.

“If it’s fine by her, it’s fine by me,” Twilight said. She waved a hoof and ran off to join the others.

Gadget smiled as she watched her go, then turned to Blue Blazer. “What did you want to talk about, Miss Blazer?” she asked. “Is there something else you wanted to show me?” She looked around excitedly, wondering if she’d missed something in the large hall.

“Well, in a manner of speaking,” Blue Blazer chuckled. “I actually just wanted to talk a little bit, but I suppose I do have some cute little gadgets, Gadget.”

They both chuckled, Gadget shaking her head and placing a hoof to her forehead. “If I had a bit for each time I’d heard that…”

Blue Blazer rolled up her sleeve. On it was a device tied around her foreleg. It had a few wires and a tiny antenna.

“Ooh, is that a short-wave radio transmitter?”

“It sure is!” She pressed a button on it. “Watch this. It sends a little signal that notifies the security guards. See?”

Gadget looked around and saw that several of the museum guards, each wearing white shirts and little earpieces, had entered the room. One by one, each took up a post at the exits to the room.

“Wow, that’s… um…” Gadget paused. Something felt off. Why were they there and why did it feel like they were boxing her in all of a sudden? She tensed up.

“And now here’s another something I wanted to show you.” She beckoned a guard over and he held up something else. It was small, rectangular, flat, and metallic. It also had a glass vial on the side and a shiny golden disc on the front. The guard pressed a button and the disc started to spin.

Gadget’s eyes went wide and her blood went cold. A spell card! she started to back away, her voice catching in her throat.

“You recognize it, I see,” Blue Blazer said. “Relax, this isn’t an offensive spell card.”

The disc emitted a high-pitched whine and the guard tossed the card over at the door that led to the miniature theater where Luna, Twilight, and Turing had gone. A second later, a large, glowing bubble appeared, completely covering the door.

“Bubble of Silence spell. Neat, isn’t it?” Blue Blazer continued to wear a calm smile even as Gadget’s eyes began to dart around. She was surrounded. And even if she yelled, the Bubble of Silence would prevent her friends from hearing her.

“Sorry for all this. I wasn’t sure I’d even get a good chance to talk to you, and I had to take extra precautions to prevent 003 from hearing us. She does have such good ears, doesn’t she? And I should know. I helped design them.”

Gadget swallowed. “What do you want?” she managed to say.

“Tricky question, but that’s why I’m here, after all. Explanations really are my special talent.” She cleared her throat. “You’ve seen these machines,” she said, gesturing to the collection of automata around them. “You’ve seen what they can do. And you’ve seen Unit 003, or ‘Turing Test,’ as you’re calling her. Just look at the massive gap between that farming automaton and your mechanical friend. She is the culmination of years of research and development, the brainchild of a great many minds, and the defiant response to a generation of thwarted ideals. We are a group of the most brilliant ponies in Equestria, Gadget, who are calling for a scientific revolution a hundred years deferred.

“But what we want right now, Gadget, is something special.”

Gadget’s mouth felt dry as Blue Blazer rested her hoof on her shoulder.

“Gadget Giroux, we want you.”

***

The donkey calling himself Burrojangles stepped out of the workshop, pushing his janitor’s trolley before him, his camera back in the hidden compartment below it. He locked the door behind him and then started to push the trolley back toward the elevator. But the trolley didn’t budge and only then did he see that a huge, heavy hand was resting on it.

He gazed up, following the arm up its owner. The weathered face of Cornelius Vanderbull looked down at him.

“Oh, hey there, boss!” Burrojangles said. “There a problem?”

“Who are you?”

“Name’s Burrojangles, sir. I just--”

“No. Who are you really?” He leaned down. “I didn’t hire you. I know every pony in this building and I don’t know you. You don’t belong here.”

“W-well, to tell the truth, I’m kinda helping out a friend of mine.” He manage a grin, his long ears lifting slightly. “Didn’t think it’d be a big deal, I just needed a few extra bits.”

Vanderbull grit his teeth. Without another word, he suddenly seized the donkey by his ears and yanked him off the ground, causing him yelp in pain as Vanderbull held him aloft.

“Who sent you? Carneighgie? Rockefoaler? Or are you just some Luddite saboteur?!” He shook him roughly. “Answer me! What were you doing in my assistant’s workshop?!”

Burrojangles went limp. “All right, all right, I give! I’ll tell ya,” he said, his face falling. “I’m… I’m working for…” He muttered something, barely above a whisper.

“What’s that?” Vanderbull pulled him closer. “Speak up!”

The donkey suddenly became energized and jerked up, kicking Vanderbull in the chin. The aging minotaur dropped the donkey, who crashed onto the trolley, toppling it. The door on the hidden compartment fell open and the camera tumbled out.

The two froze at the sight of it.

Espionage! Vanderbull realized. He reached for the camera, but the donkey had the strap in his teeth first and dashed down the hallway with it, heading for the stairwell. Vanderbull took a step and slid on the spilled cleaning fluid that was spreading over the floor. He wouldn’t be able to catch him. But that wasn’t his only option.

His muscles bulging, he seized the trolley and lifted it over his head. Taking aim he reared back and hurled it at the fleeing donkey.

The trolley flew through the air and smashed into Burrojangles, knocking him to the ground and allowing Vanderbull to run down the hallway, catching up to him. Vanderbull saw that Burrojangles had dropped the camera and snatched it up. Burrojangles shook his head, ears flopping around, and gasped when he saw that Vanderbull had the camera.

The old minotaur held it up tauntingly and beckoned to the donkey who was barely half his size. “By all means, Mr. Burrojangles,” he said, drawing his lips up into a sneer, “try and take it.”

Burrojangles swallowed. He wasn’t crazy enough to fight a minotaur for that camera. He dashed toward the stairwell and the sound of his hooves clattering could be heard.

Vanderbull didn’t bother to pursue him. He was strong, true, but he’d been around four-legged creatures long enough to know that he couldn’t outrun one. Instead he dashed toward his office and found the button for the P.A. system on his desk. He pressed the single red button on it and began speaking, his voice blasting out from every loudspeaker in the building.

“Attention! This is Vanderbull addressing all employees: We have a spy and possible saboteur. He is to be halted and detained. If you see a donkey dressed as a custodian or otherwise, you are to stop him and notify security. Whoever does so will receive a 20% increase in their annual salary.”

The donkey calling himself Burrojangles heard the sound of Vanderbull’s voice over the P.A. system and he began to sweat profusely. He saw several others on the stairs and had to dodge them as they tried to restrain him, but fortunately they were all a bunch of wispy techno-geeks or fat desk-jockeys, so they could do little more than slow him down.

At last he reached the basement. He knew there was an emergency exit that he could probably get through. He made his way through the maze of boxes and crates and other things in storage, coughing at the amount of dust and mildew in the air. He at last made the final turn and saw the door.

He froze. Standing right before him was a tall, reddish-brown unicorn stallion dressed in a security guard’s uniform.

The two stared back at each other. The guard smiled. Then, almost casually, the guard held open the door for him.

“Better get going, sir,” he said, winking at him. “Oh, and you might want to give me a quick kick in the ribs. I’ll tell them you gave me the slip.”

The donkey shook his head. “I’m afraid not. Vanderbull will investigate every security guard. He’s no doubt realized that one of the guards allowed me to slip in here in the first place. And he’ll soon realize it was you.” Noticeably, his accent had vanished. “You’ll have to come with me.”

“Great,” the guard sighed, giving a roll of his eyes. “So much for the cushiest job I ever had.”

“I’m sure we can find something else in the group for you,” the donkey chuckled, as the two of them went through the door.

They let the door close behind them and shed their uniforms. The two made their way into the darkened alley by the Vanderbull building, then pushed into the crowd of ponies on the sidewalk before catching a cab, following the flow of hundreds of other ponies into the city, vanishing into an ocean of faces.

***

“So,” Gadget said, finding her voice, “you’re with the group that built Turing Test?”

“Yes,” Blue Blazer replied.

“And… you want me to join you?”

She nodded. “Exactly.”

Gadget narrowed her eyes. “No.”

Blue Blazer raised an eyebrow, but her grin stayed in place. “Oh? Are you sure about that answer?”

Gadget glanced around the room at all the guards, taking a step back, her ears laid flat.

Blue Blazer covered her mouth, stifling a laugh. “Calm down, Gadget. We aren’t here to kidnap you. We’re here as friends. If, in the end, you decide to say no, then we won’t force you.”

Raising her head, Gadget relaxed. “Th-then, I still say no!”

“Well, hold that thought,” Blue Blazer said. She pointed to her flank, displaying the proud ‘Q&A’ mark on it. “This mark is a sign of my special talent: explaining things. I’m not just some pony who snuck into the museum, Gadget; this really is my job. So, how about this: I will set your mind at ease and let you ask me some questions. Obviously, I can’t answer everything, but I’ll do my best to be informative.” Her smile dropped slightly and she looked at her pointedly. “It’s important to us that you come willingly. So don’t be afraid of us. We’re not your enemies.”

Gadget hesitated a moment, then growing bolder, loudly asked, “If that’s true, then what did you send Turing after Twilight for?”

“That’s classified.” Blue Blazer sighed. “But if it’s any comfort, I assure you that we didn’t send Unit 003 as an assassin. We don’t mean any harm to Princess Twilight.”

Gadget paused, considering her next question. “Okay… then who are you?”

“There’s a better question,” Blue Blazer said, nodding approvingly. “Let me answer that with a few questions of my own: What if I told you there was a place where you could do virtually anything you wanted with your gifts? What if I told you about a place where scientists, engineers, researchers, and technophiles of all kinds, ages, and races were working together? And then what if I told you that you would be free to pursue your interests at your own pace, be they your own projects, or to join in someone else’s?”

Gadget stared back at her and Blue Blazer leaned in, eyes blazing, her smile radiant. “Such a place exists, Gadget! I’ve seen it! I’ve been there! And that is the kind of place I’m offering to take you to!”

Gadget frowned. “I have that. With Mr. Vanderbull, I can do anything I want--”

“--Provided it doesn’t conflict with your duties as his assistant or involve gasoline, that is.” She shook her head as Gadget gawked at her.

“You’ve been spying on me?!” she shouted.

“Easy now,” Blue Blazer said, holding up her hooves. “I apologize, but we have to do our, well... ‘research’ on potential recruits. But I must say, your history is quite interesting!”

Gadget’s throat felt dry. When she didn’t say anything, Blue Blazer continued.

“Listen. We know your story.” She came close, looking her in the eyes. “You quit school, ostensibly because you believed you’d learned all there was to know. That might have been true, but also I’m betting it’s also because the other colts and fillies were picking on you, calling you an ‘egghead’ or a ‘know-it-all’ or just thinking you were stuck-up for flaunting your prodigious skills over them. With all that bullying, it’s no wonder you holed up in the shack behind your parents’ house and used it as your makeshift workshop for a whole year.”

She narrowed her eyes. “I know that pain, Gadget. I know what it means to be so passionate and have nopony understand.”

“I--”

“And then,” Blue Blazer said, continuing on, “you spent that year developing your mechanical limbs before you finally got them right, which in turn got you your job with Vanderbull Industries. But, when you really think about it, nothing’s really changed, has it? You’re the boss’s favorite, but you feel out of place among the older workers and engineers, and you know they talk behind your back, calling you Vanderbull’s ‘pet pony.’”

Gadget looked away. “Th-that’s… I’m not--”

“And while I’m not going to deny you have a nice position,” Blue Blazer said, coming up behind Gadget, practically whispering in her ear, “we both know that Vanderbull just wants to mold you into his own image.”

Gadget felt a chill run down her spine.

“So,” Blue Blazer asked, pulling back, “am I correct?”

“S-so what if that’s true?!” Gadget cried, whirling around on her. Her teeth were grit and her eyes were aflame. “Mr. Vanderbull took me in, believed in me, and taught me everything I know about business! What’s wrong with that?! Maybe someday I can start my own business with the things he taught me!”

Blue Blazer shook her head. “He knows you too well. Out of your gratitude, you’ll stay with him until he finally tries to pass the business on to you. And you aren’t sure, at your age, if that’s really what you want to do with your life, or even if you’ll be able to follow his example. But you don’t have the guts to say anything because you’re afraid he’ll be disappointed in you.”

Gadget shut her eyes. “Sh-shut up!”

“You’re saying it’s not true?”

The young mare refused to meet her gaze. “Next question,” she whispered. “You obviously did your research on me back in Vanhoover as well as somehow getting some gossip about me from Vanderbull Industries. And you did it without me or Mr. Vanderbull knowing.” At last, she glanced over to her. “Just how many of you are there?”

Blue Blazer just smiled. “A lot.”

Gadget narrowed her eyes, glaring at her.

“Well, I wish I could give you a more direct answer, but I have to keep some things a secret and, in all honesty, I am not totally sure. But,” she added, raising her eyebrows, “it’s more than you think. Unit 003 isn’t the kind of thing some mad scientist cooks up in his basement with a small number of assistants, you know. We’re a movement. A growing movement. And we are in places you can’t imagine.”

Hugging herself, Gadget let that sink in. They could be anywhere. They could be everywhere. “Okay, then here’s my next question,” she said, taking a deep breath to steady her nerves. “Of all the ponies you could have gone after, why me?”

Blue Blazer walked around her, circling her slowly. “Well, first, it was at the behest of a certain pony. He’s a trusted associate of ours. I believe you know him as ‘Fine Print.’”

Gadget stiffened, her ears going straight up. “Wh-what? What about him?”

“He told us all about the brilliant - and cute! - young mare he met in Ponyville,” she said. At the word “cute,” Gadget’s cheeks turned bright red. Blue Blazer took Gadget’s hoof in her own, looking into her eyes, her expression solemn, almost sad. “He still cares for you. He wanted you to know that.”

Practically snarling, Gadget snatched her hoof back. “Cares for me?! He tried to wipe my friend’s memory and then he electrocuted me! Y-you can tell him the feeling’s not mutual!”

Blue Blazer sat, crossing her forelegs, with a smirk on her face. “You’re blushing, you know.”

Gadget turned away. “He hurt me. And he betrayed my trust.” She hugged herself, fighting the lump in her throat. “I really thought he was special. And he lied, used me, and treated Turing like… like some object! I won’t forgive him!”

She let out a sigh. “The offer is open regardless of your feelings about ‘Fine Print.’ And I realize you probably don’t trust us after ‘spying’ on you. But let me assure you: we aren’t trying to blackmail you and we aren’t after your research. We respect every scientist’s right to his or her own data. We only want what you’re willing to bring to the table.

“And that brings me to the second part of my answer about why we’re interested in you.” She smiled. “Gadget, your dedication is nearly unmatched, and your accomplishment at such a young age - creating the most advanced artificial prosthesis ever and managing to repair an advanced machine like 003 almost unaided, among other things - makes you a prime candidate for our organization.” She put her hoof to her chest. “We are not the bad guys here. We want to help you. We want to help everypony.”

“Then here’s a question for you!” Gadget shouted, her eyes ablaze. “Why the hay would I ever betray my friends by joining their enemies?!”

Blue Blazer rolled her eyes, letting out a loud groan. “‘Friends?’ What friends?!” she exploded. “Unit 003, for all the personality she’s managed to simulate, is still just a machine. She’s a collection of parts, and proud of her as we are, the bottom line is that she isn’t a living thing and she never will be! And furthermore the only reason you’re friends with Princess Twilight is because you helped fix her pet robot.” She shook her head, rubbing her temples. “And you want to stay with Vanderbull because you think he’s your friend? That old robber baron might have helped you grow into what you are now, but his time is already coming to an end.

“I mean, really… trains? We’re already looking toward the next big thing, and I’m willing to bet you are too. You’re ready for something new and he’s just holding you back! You’re in the prime time of your life, Gadget! It’s time to move on!”

Gadget’s knees felt weak. She felt hot, angry tears well up and spill down her cheeks. “No… s-stop it and leave me alone!”

Blue Blazer watched as Gadget slumped to her haunches and removed her glasses, trying to wipe her eyes with the sleeves of her jacket. Frowning, she sat next to Gadget and put her foreleg over her shoulder. “I know it hurts. I know how I felt when I first learned the truth.”

“The… truth?” Gadget managed to whisper.

“Should I count that as a question?” Blue Blazer asked, chuckling to herself. “Yes, Gadget, the truth. I realized that this country needs to stop living in the past. Those like Vanderbull and Celestia once upheld progress and furthered the cause of science. But now they’re just in the way. It is our time, Gadget. It is your time. Just say the word and we can leave right now. I’ll take you to a wonderful place where you can make some real friends: other brilliant ponies like you who will adore you for your beautiful mind! Come help us build the future.”

The young inventor sniffled, still trying to regain her composure. “What sort of future? Just what is all this about?”

“I can’t say too much right now, obviously. However,” she said, taking on a dreamy, far-off look, “I can say that it will be absolutely fantastic. Unit 003 could just be the beginning! We envision a world where nopony has to toil or suffer or go hungry and where machines have freed the modern Equestrian to do anything he or she wants as automata like 003 shoulder our burdens! We could use the technology we’re developing to heal the sick, enable the powerless, and connect the ponies across the nation to each other, all without anypony to hold us back! Just come with me and you can be part of it all!”

Gadget took a deep breath, still sniffling a little, and gently pushed Blue Blazer back as she rose to her hooves. “I see. I understand now.”

Blue Blazer raised her chin. “Very well then.” She glanced over at the exit. “We don’t have much time. Let’s--”

“My answer’s still no.”

The whole room froze. The security guards watching all this gawked at her, as did Blue Blazer.

Gadget took a deep breath, steadying herself, but she wore a proud smile. “I may not know who you really are, but at least I know a little more about you. You can pretend you’re just trying to live in freedom or benevolently working toward some great future, but you sent Turing Test after Twilight for some reason, and you wouldn’t have done that if you were content to mind your own business. Not to mention that you’ve probably sent spies to Vanderbull Industries and who knows how many other places. If you were really so benevolent, you wouldn’t be hiding and sneaking around. My Papa always told me that ponies who hide have something to hide. Whatever you’re planning, it won’t work. I’ll make sure of that myself!”

Blue Blazer grit her teeth. “You’re a fool, Gadget,” she hissed. “You’re giving up the best opportunity of your life for a handful of so-called ‘friends!’”

“And you’re just like Fine Print,” Gadget said, tossing her messy brown mane back. “You may have helped build Turing Test, you may even be in awe of her and what she can do, but if you can see her, talk to her, and still not accept that she has the capacity for real friendship, then you’re not as smart as you think you are. She is my friend, and if she’s what helped me and Twilight become friends too, then I don’t see anything wrong with that!”

Blue Blazer scoffed at that, wearing a sour expression. “So you’ll continue being that old minotaur’s lackey for their sake?”

She shook her head. “I’m no lackey. I’m Gadgette Fabienne Giroux, and I choose to ally myself with Mr. Vanderbull because I believe in him as a friend too. And if the time ever comes when I strike out on my own, I’ll do it for my sake, not yours.”

Blue Blazer groaned, lowering her head. “It’s a real shame, but if that’s what you’ve decided, then there’s nothing else to talk about.”

She nodded to a nearby guard, a unicorn who suddenly drew out a syringe.

“H-hey, what gives?” Gadget exclaimed, eyeing the needle.

“We’re leaving Manehattan. We’d hoped you’d come with us, but if you aren’t, then we can’t just leave you to warn Twilight and Luna. Just relax and in an hour or so, you’ll wake up as though nothing ever happened, with the last hour completely faded from your memory.”

Gadget backed up and was suddenly seized by two guards, a stallion and a mare, who held her by the forelegs. The other guard approached with the syringe.

“L-let me go!” she screamed.

“Just stay still now,” the guard said, raising the syringe.

“Y-you know,” Gadget stammered, eyes fixed on the needle, “I can tell you something else about the Point Dexter, since you’re interested in it.”

Blue Blazer sniffed. “Oh? And that is?”

“It runs on my earth pony magic, but it takes an awful lot to support the heavy metal limbs and extend it out from my body like that. Which means I had to train myself to use my magic and build it up just to use the mechanical arms as well as I can now. That includes exercise every morning, even now, and lots and lots of strength training.”

And then Gadget’s terrified expression gave way to one of steely confidence. “In other words, you probably shouldn’t have estimated me by my size.”

Suddenly she stood on her hind legs, lifting up both the stallion and mare guard on her forelegs off the ground as if they weighed no more than a feather, and then flung them both off, throwing them roughly to the floor. The confused security guard with the syringe staggered back, but Gadget had already launched herself at him, turning around rapidly and bucking both legs into his chest, sending him sailing across the room, luckily just missing a display case with one of the automata in it. Having dropped the syringe, it now flipped through the air and Gadget swatted it away, sending it sailing across the room, right at the Bubble of Silence.

Blue Blazer watched in slack-jawed horror as the magical bubble burst with a loud pop.

No sooner did that happen than a horde of guards swarmed over Gadget, trying to subdue her. Even with so many ponies trying to take her down, Gadget kept fighting, throwing them off and refusing to be dragged to the ground. As one guard tried to cover her mouth, she elbowed him in the ribs hard enough to break bone and she raised her head, gasping for air.

“Twilight, Turing, Luna, help!!”

A moment later, all three of them appeared in a burst of light as Twilight teleported them into the room.

“Gadget?!” Twilight exclaimed, seeing half a dozen guards trying to subdue the small mare.

“They’re with the group that built Turing Test!” Gadget cried, using the moment to break free from the guards’ grip. She flung a hoof at them all. “They’re plotting against Equestria!”

It only took a second for Twilight, Turing, and Luna to understand and they all faced down the security guards, heads lowered and backs arched.

Luna’s nostrils flared, her expression livid. “TREACHEROUS CURS!” she bellowed, her Royal Canterlot Voice so loud that everypony winced, holding their ears. “SURRENDER, OR FACE THE WRATH OF TWO PRINCESSES OF EQUESTRIA AND A PONY WROUGHT FROM IRON!”

“Correction: I am predominantly composed of titanium alloy,” Turing remarked. “However, that material is much stronger than iron and our combined capabilities should be more than sufficient to overcome our opponents.”

“YES! THAT IS ALSO GOOD!”

The guards all balked at the thought of fighting two alicorns and a nigh-unstoppable automaton. They all looked to their leader.

“Everypony, retreat!” Blue Blazer shouted. At that, each one removed a spell card from their shirts, pressing a button on the devices to activate them.

Twilight realized what was happening a second too late. “No! Stop them before--!”

A series of flashes was seen and the group of them vanished, leaving no trace. Even the few guards Gadget had taken down managed to get to their spell cards in time, vanishing with the rest.

“Turing!” Twilight cried urgently, seizing Turing by the shoulders, “can you replicate their teleport spell and follow them?”

Turing shook her head. “My apologies, Twilight Sparkle. Those devices do not leave a residual energy pattern like that of natural magic. I am unable to follow.”

Gadget heaved a sigh. “They could be anywhere by now.”

Luna put her hoof to her chest. “I shall alert the guards. We may yet be able to stop those interlopers before they escape!”

As Luna teleported, Gadget dashed to Twilight’s side. “Twilight, Turing, we’d better get back to Vanderbull Industries. Blue Blazer told me… well, she told me a lot of things that I’ll explain on the way, but if I’m right, then we have to get over there now!”

***

A few hours later, Luna entered Vanderbull’s spacious office. Twilight, Gadget, and Turing Test had all occupied chairs before Vanderbull’s desk. They all rose to their hooves when Luna came through the double doors.

“Your Highness,” Vanderbull said, bowing respectfully.

“I have just spoken with the Guard and the police, my friends,” Luna said, looking to each of them. “They are investigating and a national hunt for these perpetrators will be conducted. Unfortunately, there has been no word of any sightings thus far. I fear they may already have slipped through our hooves.”

“My humblest apologies,” Vanderbull said, getting down on one knee. “They infiltrated my place of business without my knowing and--”

Luna placed a hoof on his shoulder. “Please, Mr. Vanderbull,” Luna said, smiling gently. “Rise. As I hear it, you personally attempted to apprehend one of the culprits.”

Gadget jerked her head toward Vanderbull. “Sir?!” The aging minotaur turned away, his cheeks turning an uncharacteristic shade of red.

“And your assistant took down a number of the conspirators with her bare hooves as well.”

Vanderbull gasped, staring at Gadget. “Gadget? You did not tell me--”

Luna cleared her throat, getting both their attentions. “Perhaps we should instead share our information to see if we can combat these perpetrators before another such incident occurs.”

Everyone looked to each other, nodding their heads in agreement.

“Very well. Perhaps we should begin with their creation.” She looked over to Turing Test. “Turing Test, is there anything at all you can tell us that might shed some light on your creators?”

Turing shook her head. “My apologies. I have no data on anything before my reactivation approximately one month ago.”

Luna was quiet for a moment, but then asked, “Are you certain? Please, while I can understand that you may have some lingering loyalty to those who built you, I would ask that you be absolutely truthful.”

Twilight moved to Turing’s side and put her foreleg around Turing’s shoulders, causing the robot to look to her. “Princess Luna, Turing Test is my friend and she is loyal to me, her friends, and the ponies of Equestria. She has no reason to lie. If she says she doesn’t know, then I guarantee she is telling the truth.”

Turing bowed her head slightly. “Thank you, Twilight Sparkle. I value your trust.” She turned back to Luna. “I have spoken the truth, Luna. I do not serve my creators, whatever their purpose may be.”

Luna smiled. “Very well then. I apologize for doubting you.” She bowed her head slightly, then turned to face Vanderbull and Gadget. “And what of you two? What can you tell us?”

Vanderbull stepped forward. “Your Majesty, I have developed the photographs in Burrojangles’ camera. I had suspected his cause was industrial espionage, but now it seems he was a part of this conspiracy as well.” He went to his desk, unlocked a drawer and removing a manilla folder. Inside were several photographs which he laid on the coffee table at the center of the office. The others gathered around.

Twilight picked one up. It was a picture of a piece of paper with what looked like several names. There were also pictures of several documents listing numbers, maps with lines drawn on them, and one of a large bulletin board with several other papers posted onto it with pushpins.

Gadget’s jaw dropped. “Oh my gosh,” she whispered. “These… my investigation!”

“It seems,” Vanderbull said, glancing over at Gadget, “that none of these photos were of Gadget’s research or blueprints. None of her inventions were touched, the Point Dexter is still in place, and nothing at all seems to be missing.”

Gadget said nothing, but her mind was reeling and her heart was racing. Blue Blazer wasn’t lying. They didn’t try to steal my research. But why?

“If nothing was stolen, then what is all this?” Luna asked. “And what do you mean, ‘investigation,’ young Gadget?”

Gadget blinked, raising her head at the sound of her name. “Oh! Uh, well, Mr. Vanderbull and Twilight asked me to do some research to see if I could figure out who Turing’s creators could be.” She tapped on the photo with several names on it. “This is my main list. On it are all the possible candidates who I believe could have built Turing.”

Twilight squinted at the list. “Well, how did you come up with those names?”

Gadget began passing around the photos. “Take a look, everypony. I’ve been checking up on each of these places. Some are individuals, some are businesses, but all of them have some things that could have gone toward building Turing and others like her.”

“Analyzing,” Turing said, slowly moving her gaze over all the photos. “Complete. Understood, Gadget. You have been investigating those who have the resources used in my construction or those who had the means to acquire them. For instance, you have been investigating those who had access to titanium, which composes my hull.”

“Right!” Gadget held up a picture displaying a foundry. “There are only a few places like that in Equestria. And I also looked for other things, like places or companies that make or use thaumatrium. It’s very expensive and hard to make, but Turing has six whole jars of it to power her magic abilities. There are a few other things, like facilities that are far from the city or that have large warehouses where they could conduct testing. I doubt they got Turing to fly correctly on the first try.”

“Your list currently displays 25 different names, Gadget. Do you suspect each of them may be involved?”

Gadget sighed, shaking her head. “No. Some of these businesses are competitors and a bunch of the ponies on here are only on there because they’re rich enough to finance things.” Gadget gave her a half smile. “You’re the ultimate luxury item, Turing. Constructing you wouldn’t have been cheap. It would take a very rich pony, or possibly many rich ponies, to fund your construction. And honestly, this is only as far as I could narrow it down.”

Twilight gasped. “Then there’s only one explanation for all this!” she cried. “Gadget, they must have come to see if you were on to them!”

“My thoughts exactly!” Vanderbull growled, clenching a fist. “But even without these photographs, if they are associated with any of the ponies or businesses on that list--”

“--then Burrojangles will still be able to alert them,” Gadget said, her voice hushed, “and they’ll begin to cover their tracks.” She wobbled on her feet, feeling faint, and collapsed back into one of the chairs. “Oh no…”

Luna grimaced at the photos. “These conspirators have not won yet, my friends,” she said. “Gadget, though I realize you may not have arrived at a definitive answer, we cannot afford to wait. I request that you turn over your research to me and the Royal Guard will begin a nationwide investigation.”

“I have a suggestion,” Turing Test said, getting Luna’s attention. “According to Gadget, Blue Blazer made statements that indicated a larger dispersal of operatives throughout Equestria. This means they are skilled at evading detection. However, the complexity of such a large network would likely result in many flaws and weak points and necessitate a high degree of communication. By simultaneously investigating multiple suspected individuals, the likelihood of discovering something incriminating will increase.”

Luna smiled. “A wise strategy. I will recommend that to the Guard.” She then heaved a sigh. “However, I am afraid I must now return to Canterlot, my friends. The hour grows late and my sister will be expecting me. And, I… I believe I have much to discuss with her.”

They all bowed to her.

“Twilight, Turing Test, will you accompany me to the door, please?”

Twilight and Turing nodded and followed her to the door.

Vanderbull straightened his tie. “Please, Your Majesty, allow me to also--”

Luna looked over her shoulder. She was smiling, but Vanderbull stopped nonetheless. “There is no need, good sir, though your offer is appreciated. However, I would like to speak with my fellow princess and her ward more privately.”

Vanderbull nodded, bowing at the waist. “As you wish, Your Majesty.”

Luna left then, Twilight and Turing following her.

“Sir?” Gadget asked once they’d gone. “Um… is that true? What Princess Luna said about you fighting with that spy, I mean?”

Vanderbull grumbled noncommittally and refused to meet her eyes. But then Gadget spotted the small, hoof-shaped bruise on his chin.

“Oh my gosh, sir, you’re hurt!” She reached up, practically climbing him. “Are you okay? Does it hurt?”

“For goodness sake, Gadget, stop that!” he growled, pushing her away, his blush returning. “Honestly, you don’t grow up in Minos without toughening up a bit. I will be fine, though in truth I’m more angry that I didn’t simply snap that miserable donkey in half when I had the chance and let him get away.” He clenched both his fists, practically shaking with rage. “If I ever see him or any of those other traitorous vermin, I’ll…”

He sighed, letting his anger drain away, and adjusted his tie.

“Ah, no matter. It is out of my hands now.” He then crossed his arms and glanced down at Gadget with a grin. “And it seems you had something of a scuffle yourself. Would you care to tell me about that?”

Gadget looked away and Vanderbull’s smile faded. “Gadget? What’s the matter?”

The young mare sat with her head bowed. “I told you that Blue Blazer tried to recruit me, sir,” she said quietly.

He nodded. “Yes. And you rightly refused. And I am proud of you.” He smiled, but she did not raise her head to see it.

“Sir… what I didn’t tell you was that… I…” She swallowed and looked up at him, her brown eyes tearing up. When she spoke again, her voice was quivering. “I almost said yes.”

Vanderbull was silent, his gaze frozen, fixed on her. Slowly, he went back to his desk, sitting down in his tall chair, then leaning forward as he rested his arms on the desk.

“Sir?” Gadget asked, her voice cracking. “Please…” she managed to say, “please, say something.”

Vanderbull inhaled through his nostrils, taking a breath so deep that Gadget wondered if he would ever exhale. At last, he let it out and looked at her.

“Gadget, please go home.”

“S-sir?”

He looked away, his expression troubled. “Your shift is over. I would...” He paused, swallowing. “I would like to discuss this tomorrow morning. I will expect you at 8 o’clock sharp.”

***

Twilight and Turing Test walked behind Luna, who was silent until they got to the elevator.

“These things,” Luna said, making a face, “make me nervous.”

Twilight raised an eyebrow. “What, elevators?”

“Yes.” She took a deep breath and entered as the door slid open. “I feel that they could fall at any moment. It is one of the things of the modern world I could do without. I am glad Celestia has not installed one in the Palace.”

The doors slid closed and Luna relaxed slightly, though she was still tense. “I suppose that it is to be expected, though, with the long passage of time, that one could come to abhor such drastic changes as not having to ascend or descend a staircase. Or light a candle to illuminate a room. Or having a companion,” she said, glancing sideways at Turing Test, “who is not flesh and blood, but made of metal.”

Twilight and Turing looked at each other, but then turned back to Luna as they heard her chuckle. “Still, as much as I lament the time I have lost, I am glad to see the fledgling nation of Equestria grow into what it has become today. And that includes the technology that has allowed it to do so.”

The elevator dinged and the doors opened, allowing them to step out into the hallway on the ground floor. The large, open lobby was still somewhat busy, but everypony standing nearby cleared the way for the two Princesses, stopping what they were doing and bowing their heads.

It was only once Luna, Twilight, and Turing were outside and the Royal Guards standing by her chariot stepped forward that she continued speaking.

“While I cannot condone these conspirators, they may have some legitimate concerns. Perhaps if I can discuss the things I have learned with my sister, then maybe those concerns can be addressed before any harm befalls another.”

Twilight bowed her head. “I think that’s a wonderful idea, Princess Luna.”

“However,” Luna said, her gaze hardening, “I must believe in the goodness of my sister’s heart. If she has done something, for good or for ill, then it is because she must have had the benefit of Equestria in mind. These ponies act as though she is some sort of tyrant, but it was Celestia herself who directed me to see this exhibit with my own eyes and allowed me to form my own mindset. It may be that she is now reconsidering her own position and thus did not wish to press her own ideas upon me.” She paused, a slight grin on her face. “She is just and kind. I will carry that knowledge with me as I discuss my findings with her.”

Twilight nodded. “I hope you two have a good discussion, Princess Luna,” she said.

“And I am glad that our interactions were positive,” Turing added.

Luna smiled and then turned to face Turing Test. “Indeed so, Turing Test. I am glad to have made your acquaintance. Though it may pump electricity through your veins rather than blood, I believe you to have a good heart.”

Turing cocked her head. “Correction: I do not have a circulatory--”

“Turing, Turing, stop,” Twilight groaned. “She’s saying she thinks you’re a good pony. Or robot.”

“Indeed!” Luna said. “You are strange, but I am glad to count you among my friends.”

Turing bowed her head. “I am also glad. I hope we will meet again.”

“As do I.” Luna nodded to the two Royal Guards pulling her chariot and they spread their wings. A moment later, Twilight and Turing watched as they took to the air and the chariot flew off in the direction of the setting sun.

To be continued...

Author's Notes:

A lot of thanks goes out to my editors on this one. In fact, Knight Templar deserves some special attention for helping with the description of the farming automaton! Much obliged!

Time for a short round of Spot the Reference! I tried my best to faithfully represent the real form and function of many automata in this and the previous chapter. I hope I was able to portray these fascinating machines and possibly spur your interest.

-Once again, the Marellardet automaton references the real-life Maillardet's automaton. And yes, it can really write like that.

-"The Saddle Arabian" references the false automaton called "The Turk."

-Rossaddle's Universal Robots is the reference several of you have been waiting for. It references, of course, the famous play that gave us the word "robot" to begin with: Rossum's Universal Robots.

-Neighpon (the pony equivalent of "Nippon," the Japanese word for Japan) and its karakuri ningyo that can serve tea? Yep, that was real too.

Other than that, no media references on this one.

Thank you for reading, as always. See you all next time...

Nightvision

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Twilight and Turing Test heard the sound of hooves scraping on concrete and turned to see Gadget walking toward them, her eyes downcast and her ears and tail drooping.
“Gadget?” Twilight asked.

The younger mare didn’t raise her head or even reply. Her eyes remained fixed on the ground as she plodded forward.

“Gadget!” Twilight said, repeating her name more loudly than before.

Gadget’s head snapped up and she gawked at Twilight and Turing, her mouth hanging open and her eyes unfocused; Twilight noted that they were bloodshot and puffy.

“Twilight? Turing Test?” Gadget swallowed, looking slowly from one to the other. “Oh. Did you see Princess Luna off?”

“Affirmative.” Turing took a step closer. “Perhaps I am incorrect in this analysis, but your behavior seems typical of emotional distress.”

Twilight nodded, going over to her. “She’s right. Gadget, have you been crying?”

Gadget pulled back a little and put on a smile. “N-no, I’m just super tired after today.” Suddenly one of her mechanical arms shot out from under her jacket and lifted her glasses, allowing her to rub her eyes with her hoof.

“You are wearing your prosthesis as well. Is there some task that you need it for?”

Gadget kept her smile in place. “Just… just wanted to wear them.”

Twilight made a face, narrowing her eyes. “Gadget,” she said. “You know, it’s obvious that something’s bothering you. It’s so obvious even the robot can tell.” She glanced back at Turing, adding, “No offense.”

“I am not offended. It is true that I have difficulty deciphering emotions. But in your case, Gadget, it is clear that you are not feeling well, despite your insistence to the contrary.” She came alongside Twilight. “As your friends, we should try to help you.”

Gadget let her forced smile drop and she visibly sagged. “You’re… you’re right, but I don’t really want to talk about it right now.” She took a deep breath, letting it out through her nose. “I want to go home. I just want to be alone right now, okay?”

Twilight was quiet for a moment, but nodded. “If that’s what you really want--”

“It is,” Gadget said quickly. She turned to go, looking back at the two of them. “Um, I know we’d planned on spending more time together tomorrow, but if… if you two want to leave after everything that happened--”

Twilight held up her hoof. “No, it’s all right. Should we meet you here tomorrow?”

Gadget nodded, offering a small, but genuine smile. “All right. I hope you two have a nice stay here in Manehattan.”

“Thank you, Gadget,” Turing said. “Should you require us, we will be staying at the Vanderbull Hotel.”

Gadget seemed to wince at something, but then gave another nod. Twilight and Turing watched as the young mare trotted away down the sidewalk and caught a cab before disappearing into the early evening traffic.

“I wonder what happened,” Twilight said.

“Perhaps she is concerned that her gift of a trip to the museum inadvertently placed us within reach of my creators and is feeling guilty,” Turing suggested. “Is that a reasonable reaction for an organic?”

Twilight mulled that over. “Maybe. But something tells me that’s not it.” She sighed. “Well, never mind all that; let’s give her some space and we can talk to her tomorrow. In the meantime, what do you want to do with the rest of our evening here in Manehattan? Maybe we should check out one of the fancy restaurants around here! Are you hungry?”

There was a beat and then Twilight smacked her forehead with her hoof.

“Right. Robot.”

“It is true that I do not eat, but I do find the process quite interesting, especially since Discord allowed me to taste something momentarily using his magic. If we go to a restaurant, I could observe you consuming different foods, letting you describe their taste, and analyzing your reactions and time spent in mastication as--”

“No, no, never mind!” Twilight said hurriedly. Ever since Discord’s “gift,” Turing had gotten a little intense during mealtimes. It was a little hard to enjoy breakfast when Turing Test was observing her every bite.

The day before, she’d licked some marmalade off her nose and Turing had whispered “Magnificent.”

Now Twilight wasn’t sure if she’d ever eat marmalade again.

“Oh, I have an idea! I think there are still a few hours until the Manehattan Library Downtown Branch closes. Up for a little reading?” She wiggled her eyebrows at Turing.

Turing Test nodded. “Affirmative. I would like to assimilate knowledge from books not contained in your library.”

Twilight clapped her hooves together. “Then let’s go!”

***

Luna entered the throne room of Canterlot Palace, her hooves sinking into the red carpet as she passed the guards who all bowed to her. She strode toward the throne, seeing Celestia seated there and speaking to Raven, her assistant.

Celestia smiled as her sister approached. “Luna! I’m glad you’re back! Did you enjoy your trip to Manehattan?” She stood, nodding to Raven, who withdrew as the Princess descended the stairs before the throne. “I was beginning to worry. It is almost nighttime, and you still weren’t back yet. Were you delayed?”

Luna smiled back at her elder sister. “Somewhat.” Her expression grew more serious. “Would you walk with me to my chambers? I have some things to discuss with you, but I must raise the moon.”

Celestia raised an eyebrow. “Yes, of course,” she said. She hesitated, then taking a deep breath, added, “I have something I must ask of you as well.”

The two Royal sisters made their way through the inner parts of the palace, making their way toward Luna’s chambers. As they went, Luna related all that had happened during her visit to Manehattan. Celestia listened mostly in silence, only occasionally asking for minor details as Luna continued to talk.

When it was over, they’d reached Luna’s chambers and walked out onto the balcony. The sun was only barely peaking over the mountains and Celestia’s horn glowed and it slowly sank beneath the horizon. Luna’s horn glowed in turn and in the East, the pale moon began to rise.

“I see… it seems that this conspiracy may go even deeper than I suspected.” Celestia furrowed her brow. “To think that they would make their appearance while you and Twilight Sparkle were there.” Her eyes grew wide with a sudden realization. “You could have been in danger!”

Luna waved a hoof dismissively. “Nonsense. I am capable of taking care of myself. Even young Gadget proved a challenge for those miscreants.”

Celestia relaxed a little, though she still wore a frown. “Yes, I suppose that’s true. Still,” she said, draping a wing over Luna, nuzzling her lightly, “you know that I worry.”

Luna rolled her eyes, but allowed this sign of affection to go unresisted. When Celestia stood back, Luna met her gaze. “Sister,” she began, “I have left the information gathered with the Royal Guard and they will begin mounting an investigation into all possible leads this very night. But I would like to tell you more about my trip that pertains not to the conspirators, but to you.”

Celestia blinked. “To me? Luna, I don’t understand.”

Luna hesitated, even looking away, but steeled herself. “Celestia, I am glad you encouraged me to visit the exhibit today. Regardless of anything else, I was truly thrilled by all the machines constructed by the citizens of Equestria and beyond. Every day since my return, I am given reminders of how much our nation has progressed and I am grateful. I even saw a movie!”

Celestia perked up at that. “Oh? You’d been meaning to. How was it?”

“‘Twas a most glorious--” She froze, raising a hoof to her muzzle with a slight blush. “I mean, it was very nice.” She cleared her throat, regaining her composure. “My point, Celestia, is that the technology I witnessed was astonishing. And to think that the majority of those machines worked without magic of any kind. I even saw a particular automaton that could pull a plow and till entire fields on its own.”

Celestia’s smile vanished. “Oh.”

Luna pressed onwards. “Both Twilight Sparkle and the traitor Blue Blazer related the information to me that you did much to halt the spread of those automata. Or robots. Whatever you may call them.”

Celestia sighed. “I suppose I knew this question would come. You wish to know my reasoning?”

“I do,” Luna said. She rested a hoof on Celestia’s shoulder. “But you must know that I do not blame you or accuse you. I know that you must have had your reasons. Still, knowing them may be helpful in our fight against these conspirators. They seem convinced that your actions have held Equestria back from some greater destiny.”

Celestia smiled, patting Luna’s hoof. “I do. Though others may not agree, I did what I believed to be the best thing for the ponies of Equestria.”

Luna nodded, ears upright as she stood by attentively.

The Princess of the Day closed her eyes, the memory coming back to her. “It was a long time ago, but when I first began to see the new creations called automata, I too was taken by them. They were fascinating and the possibilities raced through my mind about all they could do. To free ponies from toil and pain seemed like the best thing to do.

“But then came the day I saw those farming automata. The machine performed its task perfectly and for a moment, I envisioned vast amounts of food and a farmer with the time to achieve his every goal. It was all so exciting!

“And then I turned to look at the witnesses who’d come to see the demonstration. Most were members of that little community, a few curious onlookers, some scientists, but also some farmhooves. And one of them had a plow for a cutie mark. As he looked on at the machine, his jaw dropped and his eyes grew wide, and in those eyes, I saw absolute despair. His special talent had just been made utterly superfluous and his future made redundant.

“I remember him. He was young, with a brown coat and he wore rough overalls and a straw hat over his black mane. He had a young mare with him, who held him tight. She was whispering something to him. And amid it all, the inventor of those machines was speaking in excited tones about how automata would one day relieve ponies everywhere of their troubles and pain, how one day… all labor that ponies did could one day be replaced with machines.”

Luna looked away. “I see. I had no idea.” She frowned. “Still, could they have not found other jobs to do? Other tasks?”

Celestia went to the balcony, casting her gaze toward the moon. “Luna,” she whispered, “what if somepony else could raise the moon for you?”

“Sister, in fact you raised--”

“And your ability to walk through dreams? What if somepony built a device to raise the sun and moon? What if there was a machine to go into dreams and chase away nightmares?”

Luna made a sour face. “That is not funny.”

Celestia looked back at her. “I am not joking. The inventor did say all labor. All jobs. Even yours. Even mine.”

“That… that is…” She darted her eyes around, tensing up. The idea seemed so unthinkable, and yet…

Celestia stepped closer. “What if your special talent was no longer special? What if you could do whatever you wanted, but nothing you could do would ever compare to some machine? What if a mere machine could replace you at every turn?”

“That would never happen!” Luna shouted. “That is utterly ridiculous! No machine can replace a pony! A mere unfeeling machine acting in the role of a flesh-and-blood pony is impossible!”

“And yet you met just such an ‘unfeeling’ machine today, Luna.”

Luna froze, her eyes meeting Celestia’s hard gaze. “Ah. Turing Test.”

Celestia nodded. “Somepony has built a machine that can do almost anything a pony can do. In fact, in many ways it can do things even better than we can. And there are some things it-- ah… she can do that nopony else can do.”

Luna couldn’t help but smile. “You call her ‘she.’ Turing Test is indeed a marvel, is she not?”

Celestia nodded, smiling slightly. “Yes, she is. And I came to the conclusion that she cannot help what she was made to be. Regardless of who the ponies are that brought her into this world, I have decided that she is here now and has proven herself to be loyal to Twilight Sparkle and the rest of her friends. Though I was skeptical at first, I now am convinced that she is no threat to Equestria.

“However, the same cannot be said about her kind.” She drew in a long breath, heaving a sigh. “The ponies who built her have achieved the summation of all my fears about technology. And it is even worse than I suspected.”

Luna swallowed. “Worse?”

“Turing Test seems to have a mind of her own, but she is absolutely loyal to whomever she calls her master. In this case, it is Twilight Sparkle. But in less scrupulous hooves, we are talking about a race of thinking machines that could make the average pony - perhaps all ponies - obsolete in a generation. If they have the same capacity for thought as Turing Test, then it means a future built upon slavery. And if they choose to no longer remain loyal, then it could mean an uprising of unstoppable machines that could overthrow and annihilate Equestria. A future of machines could very well mean a choice between those two unthinkable options: enslavement or oblivion.”

Luna thought this over. “Could we not provide… ah… some sort of path for such a machine to gain liberty?”

“I’ve been considering such an idea myself, as of late. But until I have some idea, I think that will have to remain a topic for another day. Especially since the conspirators building these machines have made it abundantly clear that they are enemies of the State.”

Luna nodded. “Very well.”

Celestia sighed. “Still… my fears about the rapid progress of technology has made me slow to adopt it. The dangers are many, and once the ponies of Equestria have the technology, it cannot be taken back. Even some of the things I have allowed still haunt me. The trains that I once decried are now a mainstay of our nation - thanks in no small part to Cornelius Vanderbull - and I cannot deny their advantage. And yet to fuel them, more coal is needed and so they increase the demand for more coal mining. The number of ponies in the mines is substantial.”

Luna furrowed her brow, not understanding.

“Luna,” Celestia said quietly, “coal mining is dangerous, dirty work. Many of our subjects have been victims of cave-ins. Others have suffered horrible diseases as a result of breathing in the coal dust. The doctors call it ‘black lung,’ and even treatment with magic cannot completely cure it. I… I shudder to think about how many ponies I may have hurt or even killed inadvertently.”

Luna said nothing else but embraced her sister. “Celestia… you mustn’t blame yourself for such things. You had no idea what the future would bring.”

Celestia leaned against Luna, practically burying her face in her younger sister’s sparkling mane. “No. But I do not have the luxury of standing by. I must be vigilant and use the foresight my years have granted me. The technology that some say might have spared my little ponies some pain may one day cause them far greater suffering. So I have slowed its progress until the ponies of Equestria are ready to shoulder the burden.”

Luna let her go. “I knew it was not so simple. But still…” She frowned, then shook her head. “No, we must find these conspirators first. If they have grown this bold, we must root them out before offering any sort of compromise. Even if we address their complaints now, it would seem as though we were only mollifying them, and that would be seen as weakness.”

Celestia nodded. “I agree. We should revisit the issue once the immediate crisis has passed.”

Luna went to the balcony, spreading her wings as she prepared to take flight and begin her nightly patrol to seek out the nightmares of her subjects.

“Ah, Luna, wait!” Celestia cried, causing Luna to halt just before taking to the air. “Don’t you remember? I had something to ask of you.”

Luna folded her wings. “Yes, that’s right. I’m sorry. What seems to be the problem?”

Celestia’s cold reply was only one word: “Grace.”

***

Gadget pushed open the door to her apartment. She felt something blocking the door and tried to remember what it could be. Grunting slightly as she tried to squeeze through the opening, she looked at the floor and saw it was one of many boxes filled with papers and copies of Scientific Equestrian. Gears and machine parts littered the hardwood floor of the modest apartment. The place had a small bedroom, a sitting room with an attached kitchen, and a bathroom. It was a decent size for Manehattan, but her salary could have gotten her an even bigger place if she’d wanted it. After all, working for one of the richest and most successful business owners…

She paused at the thought, a lump forming in her throat.

Mr. Vanderbull had come to the place before. Not long after becoming his assistant, Gadget had left something in the office and, just on a whim, he had stopped by the building to deliver it to her. She’d opened her door and nearly died of embarrassment when she saw her boss there. The place had been a total mess with dishes piled in the sink and the usual clutter littering every surface, but Vanderbull had only given the slightest raise of his eyebrow and asked if he could come in. And Gadget had made him some tea, but she’d been so nervous she’d actually dropped the first cup she’d poured. And in all that time, Vanderbull had only asked her why she’d chosen to continue living in such a small place when her new position meant that she could live in something much more spacious and luxurious.

In reply, Gadget had said that she wasn’t used to having a lot of space, that she wanted to save her money to buy her own supplies without relying on the company, and that she often slept in her workshop anyway, so there was no need for anything fancier. Vanderbull had smiled, nodded, and said he respected her decision. He’d finished his tea, complimented her on choosing a good flavor, and left without a single criticism, his smile still present.

She shut her eyes tightly for a few moments, opening them only as the memory faded. She saw how dark the place was and turned on a lamp. She shed her jacket and, with a wince and a sharp breath, removed the Point Dexter. She took a quick shower and then opened her cabinet, finding a can of creamed corn. She popped it open and ate directly out of it with a spoon.

There was some commotion outside her window in the street below and she found herself tensing up for some reason, but she peered outside to investigate. Apparently it was some pony who had tried to jaywalk and nearly gotten trampled by a cabbie and the two had gotten into a shouting match about whose fault it was. Nothing out of the ordinary. She sighed and went to the couch in her sitting room, reaching for a book to read before plopping herself down and sinking into the cushions.

She found it difficult to focus on the plot of the book. After 20 minutes and only getting a few pages in, constantly re-reading the same paragraph, she put the book down, heaving a sigh. She looked on her coffee table and saw a few more papers and magazines and a sketch for a new device she’d been working with off-and-on. There was also yesterday’s mail, unopened, and an unpaid bill shuffled to the side.

That last part struck her. The mail. She’d forgotten it. She jumped to her hooves and grabbed her jacket from the back of the chair she’d tossed it onto. She just hated to go out in public, even to get the mail, without wearing her jacket. She trotted downstairs to her mailbox and retrieved the key from her pocket, but dropped it on the floor. With a little mumble of frustration, she bent down to reach it.

The front door of the apartment building suddenly clicked and it swung open before her. Her eyes went wide and she gave a little cry of fear, even backing away. The dark figure in the door stood before her and her mind raced.

Is it one of Blue Blazer’s guards? Did they follow me? Do they want to hurt me for talking to the police or for trying to investigate them? Oh gosh, do they want to kidnap me?!

The figure stepped into the dim light in the little front room of the apartment. He was just a normal looking stallion wearing a black necktie.

“Huh? Oh, sorry, didn’t see ya standin’ there.” He raised an eyebrow. “Ya alright?”

“Oh.” Gadget found her voice. “Y-yes. I dropped it. My key.”

He watched her as she grabbed the key with her teeth and fumbled with it before getting it into the lock and retrieving her mail. She kept her eyes on him even as he stared back in confusion. She practically galloped upstairs and ran back into her apartment, shutting and locking the door behind her. With her heart thundering in her chest, she slumped against the door, holding her head in her hooves.

“Easy there… it’s okay. It’s okay, Gadget…”

She kept muttering that to herself until she began to calm down.

In her mind, she could still see the needle. She could feel the other guards trying to hold her still. And then the group of them all seizing her, trying to pin her to the floor. They’d been waiting for her at the museum. They’d been in her workshop. All the way home, she’d felt like she was being watched, which made her glad she’d brought the Point Dexter with her should she need to defend herself. And even now in her own apartment she didn’t feel safe, even though she was alone…

Or was she?

She raised her head and her blood ran cold. What if they had been there, in her home? What if they’d gone through her belongings?

What if they were still there?

She unsteadily got to her hooves and went to the sitting room. There was nowhere to hide. The kitchen? No, the cupboards and shelves were too small. The bathroom? No, she’d seen nothing when she was showering. The bedroom?

The closet. She hugged herself, her heart beating. She glanced around for a weapon and then remembered why she’d brought the Point Dexter home in the first place. She strapped it back on, feeling it bite into her flesh, but as the arms came to life, she felt just a little braver.

Slowly, she walked into her small bedroom, the floorboards creaking every so slightly. Just to be safe, she used one of her mechanical limbs to lift the sheets up and she peered under it. There was nothing there. And that just left the closet in the corner of the room. She walked to the door, holding her breath.

Somepony was in there. She could feel it. Somepony was in there, ready for her. They’d watch her through the keyhole, watch until she fell asleep, and then, when she was helpless…

She grit her teeth, one of her mechanical limbs seizing the doorknob. She flung it wide open.

The club came down at her head.

Gadget screamed, falling backwards as she raised her forelegs and mechanical arms alike in self-defense. There was only a dull tap and something wooden clattered to the floor.

She looked down. It was a broom. A broom had fallen out of her closet. Not a club. There was nopony in there. Just some old things from home, a few different outfits, and a few spare jackets.

“Broom.” She let out a deep breath. “Just a broom.” She chuckled at that, then snickered, and finally broke into a fit of delirious giggles. She’d scared herself half to death by imagining threats and sinister agents, but ultimately there was nopony there.

Sighing with relief, she went back to her front door and picked up the mail she’d dropped. She glanced at each one and then smiled when she saw that one of the letters was from her family back in Vanhoover. She’d only mailed them a few days ago, but it seemed they’d replied right afterwards.

Biting the corner of the envelope,she tore a hole in it and ripped it open. She removed the letter an adjusted her glasses as she read it:

Dear Gadgette,
Thank you for your letter, sweetie!
Things are going well here. Your father got a job fixing up a steamboat and your mother just won the local bake-off at the county fair! We sent a picture of her with the ribbon.
We’re so glad you’ve made friends with such an important pony and we hope you have a good time when Her Highness comes to visit with her robot friend.
It’s all right if you don’t have a coltfriend just yet. As long as you’re happy, that’s all we care about. Of course, we still eventually want grandchildren, so…
Oh, and we did give Fall Leaf that hug and said you love him and he did say “Ewwww!” pretty loud. He insists we tell you that he says you’re still a “booger brain” but, just between us, he sometimes gets lonely and sits outside your old room, so we know he misses you.
Last of all, we wanted to let you know that we think it’s great you’re doing so much important work with Mr. Vanderbull. We know you said you wish you could spend all your time “building stuff” instead of learning the business, but it will really benefit you in the future. You should trust him and be grateful for all he’s done for you. We guess we don’t need to tell you that, but we thought it might be good to hear.
We get questions from the neighbours all the time and we’re always happy to tell them how you’re doing. The important thing is that you know we love you very much and we are just so proud of you.
Love you and miss you,
Mama and Papa

Gadget sat there in the dimly lit room and gently set the letter down. The words on the page shimmered and became blurry as she tried to hold back tears, only to break down.

What have I done? she asked herself, her sobs intensifying. They’re right. Mr. Vanderbull has done so much for me, and I actually thought about betraying him. And then I had to go and tell him that. I probably really hurt him.

Sitting alone in silence, it was all she could do to simply collapse on her bed that night and cry herself to sleep.

***

In a dockside warehouse by the Manehattan Harbor, a group of ponies huddled together in relative silence among the wooden crates stacked around them. The small windows near the ceiling let the smallest sliver of moonlight in to dimly illuminate the room.

They all tensed up as they heard the sound of door opening and a shadow was cast from a figure entering.

“The gears will turn,” the figure whispered.

The ponies inside relaxed. “The nation will rise,” their leader replied. As the door closed, she flicked a switch and a small kerosene lamp began to glow. In the soft light, Blue Blazer, now devoid of her namesake article of clothing, stepped forward to greet the newcomer.

His blue fur and black leather jacket became visible. Leaning in, an easy smile on his face, he continued speaking to her in a hushed voice. “Blue Blazer. It’s good to see you again.”

She returned the smile. “Likewise, Mr. Umahara.” She shivered. “I really wish we’d thought to get some blankets. It’s freezing down here by the water.”

Umahara, known to the world as “Fine Print,” nodded to her, looking over his shoulder. “The boat will have them. I can’t promise it’ll be a luxurious ride, but it’ll do the job.”

There was a cough and a new voice said, “Good! And see if you can get a med kit, will you?” The speaker came into the light. The donkey who’d called himself “Burrojangles” was wincing and rubbing a spot on his flank. “This bruise Vanderbull gave me hurts like a--”

“Wait wait wait, what did you say, Kenuth?” Umahara’s eyes grew wide. “What happened? Were you spotted?!”

The donkey, Kenuth, made a face. “You mean they didn’t tell you anything?!”

Blue Blazer raised a hoof. “No, please, let’s get into a shouting match so that simply every dock worker in the area can hear us.” The two fell silent, though they continued glaring at each other. “Don Kenuth, we’ll get you back to writing programs in no time. I’ll brief Umahara about what happened.”

Umahara stepped off to the side with Blue Blazer. “So, what happened?” he asked, trying not to raise his voice. “My contact just said you’d all arrived at the rendezvous.”

Blue Blazer sighed. “Umahara, I’ll be brief. Don Kenuth did his best and he did get a good look at the different places that are being investigated. A few of our associates are on the list… and so is our base of operations.”

Umahara’s mouth felt dry. “Oh no. Well, what about the pictures?”

“That’s the problem,” she replied. “He got a perfect look at the information, but he was spotted by Vanderbull himself and the camera was confiscated. We need to move quickly and pull up stakes everywhere to cover our tracks, because now we’ve tipped our hoof to them and we’re utterly sunk if we’re caught.”

Umahara smacked his forehead. “Unbelievable. Well, I’ll have a message sent by telegraph. We have an operative over at the office who can get the word out discretely.”

Blue Blazer then caught him peering over her shoulder, his eyes a little wider and a slight smile on his face. She cringed inwardly, realizing who he was looking for.

“Well, at least I know your mission was--”

“A failure,” she said sullenly, cutting him off.

He froze. “What? Wait, where is--”

“She didn’t take the offer,” Blue Blazer said, shaking her head. “Umahara, I tried my hardest to convince Gadget to join us, but she said no. I’m sorry, but she turned our offer down.”

“You… that’s…” He grit his teeth. “What do you mean? How could she?! You didn’t try hard enough!”

The whole group of them, including the former museum guards and a few other agents from around Manehattan, turned to stare at this sudden outburst.

“Umahara, hush!” Blue Blazer hissed, clamping her hooves over his muzzle. “I know you’re upset, but I did everything I could.”

Umahara stared down at the floor, his eyes darting left and right frantically. “But… wait, did you tell her that I… I wanted to see her again!”

“Yes, yes, I told her that the invitation was from you.” She rolled her eyes. Stallions, she thought inwardly. When they get like this, they might as well be foals!

He swallowed. “Did,” he began, his voice quieter, “didn’t you tell her that I… I mean, the way I feel?”

She frowned, placing her hoof on his shoulder. “Yes. And you know what?” She offered him a small, sad smile. “She still cares for you, too.”

He raised his head, his eyes lighting up. “She does?”

“Yes. But she’s still angry and her loyalties are to Vanderbull and the Princesses.”

Umahara was quiet. Then his eyes hardened and he pulled his jacket up over his neck. He turned away silently and made for the door.

Blue Blazer took to the air and landed in his path. “Where do you think you’re going, Umahara?”

“To find Gadget,” he said coldly. “I have to see her and tell her--”

She shot forward, going muzzle to muzzle with him. “Umahara, no. That is an outrageously stupid idea. You’re too important to the movement and there’s nothing you can say to make her change. And even if there was, we have to leave tonight. We need your help to get out of Manehattan, and your first duty is to your comrades. I know you like her and I see why, but you can’t risk this and go off like some lovesick little colt.” She chuckled. “Besides, even without her arms, that little lady hits like a freight train. She’d probably break every bone in your body before you got the chance.”

Umahara stared back at her, his nostrils flaring, but gradually the fire in his eyes died down. “Yeah,” he said. “You’re right.”

She nodded and patted him on the back. “Oh, Umahara, I’m truly sorry. But maybe when this is all over you can go to her and talk this out. Just not now. Right now, we need to get out of here and we need your help to do it.”

He sniffed, almost chuckling. “You know,” he said ruefully, “I had it all planned. We’d escape together on the boat and watch the sunrise as we made our way toward the base. I’d explain it all and… and she’d…”

He took a long, shaky breath. “Stupid, really. I shouldn’t have gotten my hopes up.” He pushed her back with a smile. “Okay, enough delays. I’ll get a message out before the Royal Guard can even mobilize. We need another hour before we’ll be ready, but then we can sneak on board our boat and sail out without the harbormaster suspecting anything.”

Blue Blazer nodded, but as Umahara turned to go, she said, “Umahara? Uh, about Unit 003...”

With a flash of annoyance on his face, he paused and looked back at her. “Yes?”

“She really is impressive. She was talking, interacting, even joking. I know it’s all simulated, but is it possible that 003 is, I don’t know… evolving somehow?”

He smiled. “You know, 003’s so convincing, even I’ve wondered about it. To be honest, even I’m not so sure. I didn’t think she had that kind of complexity, but maybe so.”

She wrinkled her nose at that. “If she really has gained sentience, then what does that mean?”

“I don’t know,” he replied, shrugging his shoulders. “But in all honesty, I’m not sure it matters right now. We have our work to do, so we’ll have to address that issue later.”

Blue Blazer mulled that over. “I suppose that’s true. Well, then… I guess you’d better get going.”

Umahara watched as Blue Blazer blew out the kerosene lamp and he walked out of the warehouse, locking it behind him. He looked out at the moon rising slowly over the harbor. The pale reflection of it shimmered on the water amid the boats. He took one last lingering look before heaving a sigh and, zipping up his coat against the cold, went on his way to complete the mission.

***

“Unbelievable!” Vanderbull bellowed as he downed the contents of his glass in one gulp and slammed it onto the bar. “Simply unbelievable!”

He sat at the bar in his lounge in west wing of his spacious mansion. At times, this lounge, with its bar, was a place where he and his wife hosted their parties and small social gatherings. There were soft, plush couches, a crystalline chandelier overhead, and of course the well-stocked bar where he and others could slake their thirst.

But that night, he sat there alone, in total silence save for his own rumblings, until faintly there came the sound of hooves and the gentle clicking of somepony’s tongue.

“Cornelius, dear, what are you doing at this hour?”

He turned, rotating on the barstool, and saw his wife standing there.

Sophia Vanderbull was a sandy-colored unicorn with a black mane drawn up into a bun. She wore a fine, silken nightgown and her face was mostly serene, save for a slightly raised eyebrow.

“Ah.” Vanderbull rose to his hooves. “I’m sorry. Did I wake you, darling?”

She yawned, covering her mouth with a hoof in a ladylike way. “No, but you are keeping me awake. You were late getting home and I had to eat supper by myself, but I at least expected to see you at bedtime. I’ve been reading for half an hour and you’ve just been down here snarling like a wild beast.”

He lowered his head. “Oh. I didn’t realize you could hear me.”

She smiled and went over to the bar, taking a seat next to him. Using her magic, she uncorked the half-filled bottle and poured herself a fresh glass. She took a drink and swallowed, giving a satisfied sigh.

“You only drink alone when you’re upset.” She glanced up at him. “Cornelius, did something happen at work today? Please tell me you aren’t worrying yourself into a tizzy over some foolish business merger or negotiating some new railroad deal.”

He scoffed at that and refilled his glass. “No. This is different.” He gazed down at his reflection in the amber-colored liquid. “Let me tell you…”

She listened to him as he told the tale, about the spy, about Luna and Twilight’s visit, all the while growing more agitated until he finally recounted his last conversation with Gadget.

“After everything I’ve done for her, after all the time and energy and money spent on her,” he growled, rising to his hooves, practically shaking with anger, “she was actually thinking of going with those traitors?!” He clenched his fists, his eyes bulging, snorting like a mad bull. “How could she be so… ungrateful!”

“Cornelius…”

“That’s it! Ungrateful! I gave her everything she needed and doted on her and--”

“Cornelius.”

The tone from his wife was not especially loud or sharp, but it had an edge to it that brought him out of his rambling. He turned around, slowly letting his tension drain out of him.

“I’m sorry, Sophia,” he sighed. “But I simply can’t fathom what she was thinking.”

She took another sip and finished her drink, then gently got down from the stool and beckoned toward the couch. Vanderbull obediently sat on the couch and Sophia hopped up on it next to him and put her hooves on his shoulders, gently massaging them. He let out a sigh and his breathing slowed.

“Better, dear?” she asked.

He only nodded, closing his eyes.

“Now, tell me, did you get angry?” she asked, no hint of accusation in her voice. “Or yell at her?”

He shook his head. “No. I only told her to go home and I would think about it. I was actually angry, but I didn’t show it. I realized I had better calm down before I did something I regretted.”

“That’s good,” she said, continuing to knead. “You must be mellowing with age to have held back. You do have such a frightful temper when you get upset.”

“Hmph,” he grunted. “Just my minotaur nature.”

She rolled her eyes. “Oh of course. When others say you have a temper it’s ‘racism,’ but when you say it, it’s--”

“--self-deprecation.” He glanced back at her, wearing a slight smile.

She giggled. “If you say so.” She then grew more serious. “So, are you disappointed because Gadget considered leaving your employ?”

“Of course. Why shouldn’t I be?”

“I didn’t say you shouldn’t be,” she said, leaning into a stubborn knot of tension. “But what I don’t understand is why that upsets you when, in the end, she turned them down and even told you about it. So she had to think about it… why does that make you upset?”

He made a face. “I… I suppose I didn’t think she would even consider such an offer. That her loyalty to the company--”

“--to you, you mean.”

“Yes, yes, blast it all!” he growled, but then calmed down as Sophia pushed hard between his shoulder blades. “What I mean is… I suppose…”

Sophia shook her head. “Cornelius, let’s be honest about a few things. When you first introduced me to Gadget, I did not like her at all.”

He raised his head, wearing a look of confusion. “You never told me that.”

“Yes, well… I thought, ah…”

Vanderbull turned around to face her, the smugness on his face plain as day. “Why Sophia, were you jealous?”

She blushed. “I admit that at first I worried that perhaps you’d grown tired of this old nag and wanted a spritely young filly to hang onto your every word. But then I saw how eager she was to prove herself valuable and that you, in turn, looked on her with pride rather than… well, something else. And I grew to enjoy her whenever she came to visit or whenever I happened to come to the office.”

The two smiled at each other. “Sophia,” Vanderbull said, “how could you ever think I would abandon you?” He swept her into his arms and she rested her head on his broad chest as he cradled her. “What sort of fool would I be if I abandoned the most beautiful mare in all the land? Without you, everything else means nothing.”

She smiled contentedly. “You old charmer.” She took a deep breath. “But you need to give your relationship with Gadget some serious thought. Even if she isn’t some paramour to you, it’s obvious that she is more than just an employee. Every time I see you two together, I see it in your eyes. I see how she’s fulfilled some part of you.”

Vanderbull held her tighter. “Sophia, I… you know, if we could have had children of our own…” He paused, trailing off, but she waited in silence for him to continue. “And we decided not to adopt and I thought that was all well and good, but as time has gone by and there’s been nopony to step forward to follow in my hoofsteps, I find myself worrying about my legacy. Who could I pass it off to?”

She rested a hoof on his chest, feeling his heartbeat. “Please, don’t apologize. We made our decisions together and I wouldn’t have changed anything. But in the meantime, you need to consider what Gadget wants.” She opened her eyes, sitting up to look at him. “She is not our daughter, Cornelius.”

He looked down. “No. No, I suppose she isn’t. And I suppose I ought to have a frank discussion with her about all this. I’d always expected her to be perfectly happy with her situation. Perhaps I haven’t been fair.”

Sophia nodded. “Well, then. It seems there’s nothing to do but get some rest before tomorrow.” She reached up and ran a hoof along his horns, playfully.

“I suppose so.” He smiled, and kissed her forehead before picking her up and carrying her out of the room. “I love you, Mrs. Vanderbull.”

“You’d better, you big dummy.” The two of them laughed, putting out the lights as they turned in for the night.

***

Twilight leaned back in bed, resting her head on the pillow as she used her magic to turn off the light. The luxurious hotel room in the Vanderbull Hotel was certainly comfortable and she and Turing had retired there after spending hours in the Manehattan Library. Twilight was tired, but hungry, so she’d ordered room service and managed to mostly ignore Turing as she watched her wolf down dinner. After that, Turing had said that she would need some time to compile the data from the books she’d read.

She quietly slipped into slumber. But some time later she woke up when she heard the familiar sound of gears whirring and through her eyelids she detected a distinct violet glow.

“Compiling has been completed, Twilight Sparkle.”

She barely opened her eyes and saw Turing Test’s glowing purple eyes bathing her with their light. Somewhat blinded and without any night vision, to her it looked as though two disembodied purple orbs were staring right at her.

“Mmm…” Twilight groaned, sitting up. “Turing, what time is it?”

“It is 1:26 AM, Twilight Sparkle.”

“Turing, it’s awfully late.”

Turing tilted her head. “That is incorrect. As the day has only recently started, it is awfully early.”

“Turing, that’s... what do you want?”

“I wished to tell you that I had finished compiling the data.”

Twilight rubbed her eyes. “Uh huh.” She yawned. “You were just sitting there for a while, so I decided to go to bed. How many books did you read? I managed to speed-read a few myself.”

“I successfully scanned one thousand and thirty-eight books, Twilight Sparkle.”

Twilight began coughing. “Wh-what?! You read over a thousand books?!”

“With an average rate of 10 seconds per book, and approximately four hours until they forcibly ejected us to close the library, I could easily have read up to one thousand four-hundred forty books. However, some time was spent in skipping books I had already read, moving to new sections of the library, and only seeking topics that seemed more relevant. Also, I found that I had to repeatedly explain my activities to other library patrons and the librarians who found my presence distracting.”

Twilight made no reply.

“Please wake up, Twilight Sparkle.” Turing then made a high-pitched beeping noise, which caused Twilight to jerk her head up and bop Turing on the head, causing her to stop beeping.

“Snooze mode activated.”

“Gah! What the… Turing? What time is it?”

“It is 1:27 AM, Twilight Sparkle.”

“What… wait, did you just wake me up again?!”

“You were unconscious for part of my reply to your inquiry about the number of books I read. It seemed reasonable that you would wish to hear the complete response.”

Twilight rubbed her forehead. “Turing Test, it’s late--”

“Early.”

“Whatever!” she snapped. “Look, it has been a long day and I’m tired. I want to go to bed.”

“You are in bed now.”

“I mean I want to sleep and you’re keeping me awake!”

“I see. My apologies. I will not attempt to awaken you again.”

Twilight nodded, her eyes drooping. “That’s good. Good night, Turing Test.”

“Good night, Twilight Sparkle.”

Twilight lay on the bed and closed her eyes, expecting to hear Turing Test exit the room. Instead, her robotic companion only continued to stand there, her eyes still aglow.

“Turing, I said I’m going to bed.”

“You are still in bed.”

“Turing, do you have to stand there with your eyes on, staring at me like that?!” she shouted, whirling her head around. “Please, I just want to rest!”

“Understood. My eyes and the act of watching you are making you uncomfortable. I will remedy the situation.”

Turing’s eyes dimmed and soon the room was completely black. Twilight relaxed and turned back over. Only now, she realized that Turing was still sitting in the same position, still staring at her with her eyes completely black and unseeing in the darkness. But she was still there, still listening.

It’s just Turing Test, Twilight told herself, and there’s no reason to mind it. She’s not creepy, she’s just sitting there, probably waiting for you to wake up. Now, let’s just… darn it!

She sat up. “Turing, why are you just sitting there?”

“Shall I stand instead?”

“Turing do you want something?”

There was a pause. “I apologize, Twilight Sparkle. After compiling the data from the books scanned at the library and considering the information gathered at the museum, I wished to discuss several matters with you. However, it is clear that my presence at this time is unwanted. I will discuss my concerns with you at another time that is more convenient.”

Twilight noticed the pause. Turing did not inflect her speech like normal ponies, but Twilight was getting better and better at “reading” Turing Test and she started to understand that Turing really wanted to talk to her, that she had something on her mind and didn’t want to wait to talk about it.

Using her magic, Twilight clicked on the lamp again, giving a start at the sight of Turing Test’s black-eyed, vacant stare in the now illuminated room.

“Turn your eyes on, Turing,” Twilight sighed, sitting up on the bed, “and tell me what’s bothering you.”

Turing’s eyes flickered on and she saw that Twilight was wearing a weak smile, though her eyes were heavy and bleary. “Are you certain that--”

“Turing Test, just tell me what’s on your mind. I’m awake, at least for now, so you might as well tell me.”

The mechanical mare nodded. “I wished to discuss my reaction to the automata we viewed today. It was a very interesting experience and I have gained a new appreciation for the advances that led to my creation. You helped me to comprehend my relation to the machines of the past, and as a machine, I am now more aware of how I compare to them.

“However, something I noticed now troubles me.”

Twilight sat up, frowning. “Troubles you? What do you mean? Are you having an emotional response?”

“I am not certain. However, my cognitive function is not processing the data as quickly as expected. No loops have been detected, and yet I cannot say that it is not significant. I have merely used the term that I believe is most suitable to describe my reaction.”

Twilight rubbed her eyes, trying to focus. “Your reaction to what, exactly?”

“When I learned that we would be viewing an exhibit on other automata, I considered that some would resemble me in a way that was more than superficial. Perhaps I would encounter another intelligence that, though primitive, would somewhat resemble my own. Instead, all the automata in the exhibit were…”

Twilight waited for Turing to finish and narrowed her eyes. When Turing did not continue, Twilight cleared her throat. “Please, go on. What were they, Turing Test?”

“...I cannot explain. I do not have a sufficient word in my vocabulary. What I mean is that I looked at those machines and recognized nothing resembling the complexity of my own cognitive function. They moved and functioned and in many cases demonstrated an excellent fusion of both form and function, but ultimately they were all mere tools designed for only limited objectives. They were… empty. They were not…”

“...Alive?”

Turing’s ears twitched. “That word seems inappropriate. I am not alive either.”

Twilight cringed at that.

“I do not understand why such a declaration distresses you, Twilight Sparkle, but it is true. However, what troubles me is not that the other automata were without consciousness. What struck me is that my reaction and lack of empathy for them has made me wonder if my reaction to them is similar to the reaction other ponies have to me.”

Twilight’s lips parted. “Oh. Oh, Turing…”

“I believe I understand why most organics do not accept me. They see me and do not recognize a consciousness like their own. Perhaps, as a machine, I do not truly possess a consciousness that organics can recognize as similar to their own.”

Twilight slid off the bed and pulled Turing Test in for a hug. “Don’t say that, Turing,” she whispered. “You aren’t like those things in the museum. You’re so much more.”

“I am not certain that I am,” Turing continued, simply standing there and not returning the hug. “I have read many books on numerous matters including several books on philosophy and theology. The majority of such thinkers ascribe special characteristics to ponies that inanimate objects and animals do not possess. They posit that what animates and truly makes a being, like ponies or other intelligent races, is something that exists beyond the physical realm.”

Twilight felt Turing slip from her grasp and step backwards. Uncertain of what to say, she could only watch as her robotic friend stared intently at her.

“Twilight Sparkle,” she began quietly, “do I have a soul?”

With a lump in her throat, Twilight stood up straight and offered her a placid smile. “Turing Test, nopony really knows if such a thing exists.”

“It does seem to be widely accepted.”

“That doesn’t mean that it’s true. Some ponies think it does, and others don’t.”

“Then what do you believe, Twilight Sparkle?”

Twilight chuckled and gave her a knowing, sideways glance. “I think that it doesn’t matter what I think and that you shouldn’t accept my answer anyway. But I do know one thing: if organic ponies do have a soul, then I’m sure you have one too.”

Turing was quiet for a moment, her ears twitching and her eyes contracting. Then she stepped forward and gently draped her forelegs around Twilight. In a voice barely above a whisper, she said only two words:

“Thank you.”

As the two friends parted from their embrace, Turing added, “I still hope that one day I am able to decisively prove my own self-awareness and perhaps gain acceptance.”

“I guess we’ll just have to wait and see,” Twilight replied as she yawned and turned back toward her bed. “Well, good nigh--”

There was a sudden knock on the door.

“Oh for the love of…” Twilight teleported to the hotel door, ready to snap at whoever was coming by so late and undid the latch, opening the door widely. “Do you know what time--”

Gadget stood there. She held a small bag in one of her mechanical arms and she was hugging herself as she sat in the hallway. Her hair was disheveled and her eyes bloodshot. “Um… I got scared,” she whimpered. “And… and I decided I really don’t want to be alone tonight. May I… that is, if it’s okay…?”

Twilight levitated the bag into the room and gently guided the young mare inside. “Come on inside, Gadget. We’ve got you covered.”

***

The chariot flew over the tall, round-topped hills, the cold autumn air chilling the two sisters as they approached the peak of one of them. Like the others, it was rocky and sheer, but low enough to not be covered with snow. Unlike the others, this one had a building on it. It resembled a lodge or a hotel at first, but then Luna caught sight of the bars over the windows.

When the Chariot touched down, Celestia wasted no time in disembarking. Luna hurriedly followed her elder sister to the front gates. The two guards bowed, immediately clearing the way and opening the doors for the two of them.

Once inside, Luna saw the checkered floor and caught the distinct smell of disinfectants (something else she’d had to get used to since her return, as such chemicals did not exist a millennium ago) and saw the doctors and nurses moving about. As soon as the two Princesses entered, even the personnel stopped to bow to them.

Celestia smiled, but gave only the most cursory of nods. The pony behind the front desk stood and bowed as well. “Your Highnesses,” he said. “Doctor Chaise Lounge is on the third floor. She’ll be waiting for you.”

“Very good. Thank you,” Celestia said.

Luna followed Celestia down the hall as she made her way to the stairs. The light-blue paint on the walls looked pristine, but the walls themselves had large dents in them.

“So,” Luna muttered, “this is a hospital acting as a prison? Or a prison masquerading as a hospital?”

Celestia slowed and looked back at Luna. “As a matter of fact,” she said, somewhat sternly, “it is a bit of both. This place is here to help some of our most disturbed subjects, Luna. Some of them are dangers to themselves or others through no fault of their own.”

“And does that category,” Luna asked, raising an eyebrow, “include Grace?”

Celestia sighed. “No. But for someone like her, there is no facility better equipped to handle her, should the need arise.”

The two of them ascended the stairs and were quickly spotted by a pale yellow pony with a burgundy mane with a streak of gray running through it. She was wearing a white coat, much like the other doctors, as well as a pair of glasses. On her flank, she bore the image of a strange-looking couch.

“Your Highnesses,” the doctor said.

“Dr. Chaise Lounge,” Celestia said, nodding to her. “This is my sister, Princess Luna.”

Chaise Lounge turned and gave a similar bow to Luna. “It is an honor to meet you. I appreciate you coming out to such a remote place, but your sister, upon being told of our situation, believes you might be able to assist us.”

Luna put a hoof to her chest. “I will do my best. However,” she said, narrowing her eyes, “I am not certain I understand. This criminal, Amazing Grace, is unresponsive, isn’t she?”

“Well, yes,” Chaise Lounge said, looking away, rubbing her neck, “but ever since she’s arrived, some odd things have been happening. Many patients, even the docile ones, seem to be getting more hostile and restless. And many of the staff swear they hear voices and a few of them even say they’ve seen… well, things.”

Luna simply stared at her.

“You think we are imagining things.”

“I do not know,” Luna replied. “However, Celestia told me that both Grace and her companion, Glory, had their dark magic enhancements removed from them. Glory lost much of his healing, and Grace should no longer be able to mentally attack her victims.”

Chaise Lounge nodded. “That’s true. But the alchemical enhancements are much more difficult to neutralize, which is why both are still in high-security custody.”

“As a matter of fact,” Celestia added, “Glory is in an exceptionally secure dungeon. He has refused to talk about who hired him and only demands that he be allowed to see Grace.” She sighed, shaking her head. “For all that he is, it seems that he cares for her beyond anything else. He could be sent to Tartarus and would probably not mind it, so long as his only friend was with him.”

“So then,” Luna said, “you wish for me to enter her dreams, perhaps discern if there is something unknown going on, maybe even learn who hired her and Glory. Is there anything more?”

Chaise Lounge shook her head. “No, Your Highness. This way, please.”

They went down the hall and right to the room in the very corner of the ward. Chaise Lounge held open the door and the two sisters entered.

Grace lay there in the small, darkened room. Her habit still adorned her head, her dirty blonde mane flowing out over her pillow. Her eyes were closed and her chest rose and fell with glacial slowness. A heart monitor beeped a regular rhythm and an IV drip was connected to her arm. All four legs were tied to her hospital bed.

Luna frowned. “Why is she allowed to wear that garment?”

Chaise Lounge cleared her throat. “My apologies, but patients often do better with an object of familiarity. She might come out of her catatonic state if she’s aware of something she knows.”

Luna sniffed at that. “From what I understand, her victims recover slowly, if at all, so I see no reason to hasten her return other than to also hasten her punishment.”

Celestia raised an eyebrow. “Luna. I apologize, but…”

“Do not worry, Sister. I will do my best regardless.”

A pale stream of white light flowed like a thread from her horn to Grace’s forehead. There was a moment of silence and Luna scrunched her eyes shut as she concentrated. Grace twitched slightly, her breathing momentarily quickening along with her heart rate.

Suddenly, Luna gave a cry of frustration and broke the connection, raising her head as she did so.

“Luna!” Celestia cried, going to her side. “Are you--”

“I am fine,” she assured her, “but I am unable to delve into her mind.”

Celestia looked back to Grace. “What? How can that be?”

“I am uncertain. Perhaps her mind is simply too broken to be coherent. Or perhaps even in her subconscious, she wishes to resist me. In either case, there is nothing I can do.”

Chaise Lounge bowed low to them both. “I see. I am terribly sorry to have wasted your time, Your Highnesses.”

Celestia and Luna both smiled at her. “Not at all,” Celestia said, raising a hoof, encouraging her to rise.

“It was a good idea and even I did not expect this outcome,” Luna added.

Chaise Lounge sighed. “I just wish I knew what this was all about. So many of the staff keep complaining about those visions. They see a horrible beast in silvery armor with glowing purple eyes.”

Luna and Celestia froze.

“I suppose it must be some sort of mass hysteria. I’ll encourage the staff to take some of their vacation time to relax.” She shrugged and then held open the door for them both.

Luna and Celestia exchanged a knowing glance. “Ah, would you mind going ahead of us, doctor?” Celestia asked. “I’d like to discuss something with my sister.”

Chaise Lounge nodded. “As you wish.”

Once they were alone, the two sisters exchanged a knowing glance.

“Turing Test?” Celestia asked.

“It must be,” Luna replied.

“But how?”

“Well,” she said slowly, rubbing her chin with her hoof, “perhaps some residual effect of Grace’s mental abilities are projecting her lingering nightmares onto the others.”

Celestia sighed. “I suppose that could be the case. Well, then, let’s leave this place and return to Canterlot. Hopefully reversing the alchemical enhancements will put an end to the problem.”

Luna nodded and followed Celestia out of the room. She took one last look back into the room, however, a small smile on her lips. “Should you awaken,” she whispered to the catatonic nun, “you may prefer whatever sentence is meted out to you. At least then you would have nothing to fear from that robot.”

That said, she turned and let the door slowly shut.

***

As morning dawned over Manehattan, inside Vanderbull Industries, an elevator dinged and the doors slid open. Gadget, flanked by Twilight Sparkle and Turing Test, stepped out and began to trek down the hall toward Vanderbull’s office at the end.

Gulping, Gadget slowly made her way toward the double doors. “I w-wonder if this is how criminals in the old days felt on the way to the gallows.”

Twilight rolled her eyes. “Gadget, calm down. Mr. Vanderbull’s really nice. I’m sure everything’s going to be fine.”

“B-but what if it’s not?” she asked, her knees knocking together. “What if he decides to demote me? What if he cuts off the research I’ve been doing? What if… what if he fires me?”

“It would be illogical for him to terminate your employment after demonstrating your loyalty,” Turing observed.

“Maybe so,” Gadget said, “but you don’t know for sure that he won’t! He was pretty upset when I told him I’d almost said yes to Blue Blazer.”

Twilight stepped in front of her. “No, we don’t know for sure,” she said, offering her a confident smile, “but even if he does, everything will be all right. You’ve got our support and there are lots of other jobs a smart pony like you can get.”

Gadget heaved a long, heavy sigh. “Okay,” she said at last, raising her head and smiling weakly. “I’d better go in.”

“Shall we accompany you, Gadget?”

“No,” she replied, standing up straight. “This is between me and my boss. I’ll face this head on.”

Twilight and Turing stepped back as Gadget knocked on the double doors.

“Come in!” Vanderbull called.

Gadget entered to see a stallion clasping Vanderbull’s hand in his hooves as they both stood in front of his desk.

“Seriously, sir, I can’t thank you enough and I’m so sorry--”

“No, no, it’s all right, Flip Switch,” Vanderbull said, holding up his other hand. “As I said, it’s my fault for losing my temper. And, in light of what happened, I need ponies I can trust… and you certainly wouldn’t have alerted me if you’d been with the infiltrators. Just be more careful and report anything suspicious the instant you see it.”

“Yes, of course! I will, sir!”

Flip Switch tipped his hat to Vanderbull and made for the exit, smiling at Gadget as he passed. Once he’d gone, Gadget looked over at Vanderbull inquisitively.

“Mr. Flip Switch is the one who spotted that Burrojangles fellow entering your workshop. He really should have alerted security, but if it were not for him, we might never have known that your workshop had been breached.”

Gadget nodded. “Oh. Okay.” She swallowed. “You wanted to see me, sir?”

“Yes, that’s right.” Vanderbull gestured at one of the large chairs he kept in the office and she took a seat. He took up a seat as well across from her. “I think we should have a chat about your future, Gadget.”

She sighed. “Listen, sir,” she began, pulling a paper from her inner jacket pocket, offering it with one mechanical hand, “I want you to have this.”

Vanderbull leaned forward and took the paper. He unfolded it and his eyes went wide. “These are blueprints for some sort of mechanical lock. What is it for?”

“It’s just a going away present,” she said quietly. “Just to show you that there are no hard feelings.”

Vanderbull was quiet and lowered his head. “I see. You’re resigning.”

Gadget sat upright. “What? No, I… I thought you were firing me!”

The two stared at each other for a moment, and then Vanderbull started to laugh, much to Gadget’s confusion.

“Look, Gadget, I had a nice, long chat with my wife last night and I think I’ve come to some conclusions. But before I get to that, I’d like to hear why you considered accepting Blue Blazer’s offer in the first place.”

Gadget scrunched inward, steepling her mechanical fingers on both pairs of hands. “Well, sir, I have to admit that part of it is just that it sounded exciting. Working on any project I ever wanted, either my own or to help somepony else with theirs, finding out how Turing Test was built, and not having to worry about my assistant duties.”

“I see,” Vanderbull said, leaning back. “Then... do you no longer wish to be my assistant?”

“Oh no, not at all, sir!” she cried. “I love being your assistant! I’ve learned so much and I love to see all the places and meet the ponies that you do. It’s exciting and I really feel like it’s important work. Sure it’s hard work and sometimes I’d rather just be back in my workshop creating things, but I understand the benefits.”

She grew somber then, her ears drooping.

“Sir, the problem is that I… I worry that I’m going to disappoint you.”

Vanderbull leaned forward. “Go on.”

She turned away. “I’m always messing things up and you have to keep snapping me back to reality. And sometimes when you’re planning some big business deal or negotiating something with one of the railroad owners, I’m just off daydreaming. Blue Blazer said that you might want me to be your successor one day, and I,” she sniffled, “I realized that I j-just don’t know if I can do a good enough job. I’m not s-sure I can live up to your example, sir. W-what if that happens and I run the business into the ground? What if I ruin everything you’ve worked so hard for? I… I don’t… I’m sorry, sir.”

She felt a heavy hand on her head and looked up to see Vanderbull smiling down at her.

“Gadget, in fact I should apologize to you.” He crouched down to be on eye level with her. “There is something I’ve never really said to you, though I suspect even you may be aware of it. Gadget, I don’t have any children of my own, and for ages I did not wish for any. But having you around has renewed me in many small ways I cannot properly articulate. What I am trying to say is that, in many ways, you are like the daughter I’ve never had.”

Gadget blushed. “Sir… that’s…”

“I’ll tell you what it is,” Vanderbull said, and now it was his turn to look away. “It is cruel.”

“Cruel? Why?”

“Because I’ve rested my hopes and expectations on you in ways you were not prepared for. I made demands of you that I wouldn’t make of any other employee and set you apart from the others in a way that surely must have alienated you. And now I see I’ve given you these anxieties and perhaps even driven a wedge between us. That is my mistake, Gadget.”

He stood and went to the desk where he’d laid Gadget’s blueprints. “These blueprints are another reminder to me that you and I are quite different. If you were going to lose this job, you should have held onto these plans and tried to sell them. Instead, you gave them to me for nothing.”

Gadget blinked. “Oh.” She smacked her own forehead. “I didn’t even think about that.”

Vanderbull chuckled. “Gadget, you are still young and perhaps you will one day develop a better head for business that will balance your generous streak. Too many inventors are so high-minded that they cheat themselves out of success. And too many business owners have no compassion for others. I see your potential to even these out.

“But what’s most important to me is that you know that the choices you make for your future are up to you. I may be getting old, but my time has not passed yet. When it finally comes time for me to retire and if you follow in my hoofsteps and become my successor, that would be wonderful, but only if you want that responsibility. If you do not, then I want you to know that I will respect that decision. I will never ask you to give up your happiness for me.”

Gadget smiled, happy tears forming in her eyes. “Sir,” she whispered. “I… I don’t know what to say.” She hopped off her seat and walked over to him. He crouched down and the two embraced each other. “Believe me, sir, I am happy here. I’m just glad you’re happy with me.”

“Well, now that we’ve settled that,” Vanderbull said, smoothing off his coat, resuming his usual demeanor, “you should go prepare Princess Twilight and Turing Test for your other surprise.”

Gadget blinked.

Vanderbull chuckled, shaking his head. “Oh, Gadget. Did you honestly forget about our guest?”

Gadget continued staring at him for a moment before her eyes went wide. “Oh my gosh! That’s right! With all the excitement--”

“He’ll be here in half an hour. Meet us in the Guest Room at that time.”

***

Twilight noticed the spring in Gadget’s step as she led her and Turing Test down the hall.

“I’m really glad it all worked out, Gadget,” Twilight said. “You seem really excited about today, too!”

“What activities have you planned, Gadget?” Turing asked. “Twilight Sparkle suggested a tour of something with historical significance, or perhaps an ‘off-Bridleway’ performance. Given the nature of your previous surprises, however, I anticipate something less conventional.”

Gadget raised an eyebrow. “Well, you’re right about that, Turing. In fact,” she said, stopping by a door, “this particular surprise is right behind this door.”

Twilight and Turing exchanged glances before looking back at the door.

“You seem to be very good at planning your surprises, Gadget. I am unable to predict what could be inside.”

“Then let me show you.” She knocked on the door.

“Come in, please!” came Mr. Vanderbull’s voice.

Gadget gestured to Twilight, who used her magic to turn the knob and open the door. They walked inside a cozy room with several chairs around a coffee table sitting on an ornate rug. Vanderbull was lightly chatting with someone sitting in the chair nearest to them, but his back was turned and he was obscured behind the tall back of the chair.

“Princess Twilight, Turing Test, you’ve arrived!” Vanderbull said. “There’s someone we’d like you both to meet.”

The figure rose from the chair and his black wings spread out as he stood and came around to face them. Twilight saw he was a griffon with a white, owlish face, pale white claws with black talons, and black paws and a slender black tail. He was wearing a gray tweed jacket over a shirt and paisley necktie. He smiled and gave a little bow to Twilight.

“You must be Princess Twilight Sparkle,” he said, a clear Trottingham accent coming through.

“Yes, that’s right,” she said.

He nodded and then turned toward Turing Test, his eyes lighting up.

“And you,” he said, putting out his claw, “must be the one they call Turing.”

“Affirmative,” Turing said, placing her hoof in his claw. “I am called Turing.”

“As am I,” he said, chuckling to himself. “Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Talon Turing.”

To be continued...

Author's Notes:

Step right up, fillies and gentlecolts! Next chapter, it's two Turings for the price of one! And considering that fanfics are free, that's a pretty good deal!

References:

-Sophia Vanderbull is named after the real-life Cornelius Vanderbilt's first wife Sophia. Unlike the Vanderbulls, however, the Vanderbilts had many many children. Vanderbull's concerns about a successor, however, are a reference to Vanderbilt's own worries, as his favorite son was killed during the Civil War and he had concerns that his other son could follow in his footsteps.

-Burrojangles' real name, Don Kenuth, is a pun on real-life computers scientist Donald Knuth and the word "donkey." Because, you know... he's a donkey. (crickets chirping)

-Chaise Lounge is so named because a chaise lounge is that weird couch you always see psychiatrists use in TV shows and movies.

-Before anyone asks, no, Turing asking if she has a soul is not a "Mass Effect" reference, although numerous readers have convinced me that I need to play that series sometime.

-Lastly of course is the title. I chose it because the majority of the chapter happens at night, obviously. The title is shared with, you guessed it, a song by Daft Punk:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NQ-mm1H7uJw

Been a lot of interesting discussion in the comments lately. A lot of different ideas have been tossed around and it makes me really happy to see this story provoke such discussion. The information provided by a lot of readers helped shape the nature of this chapter and likely many chapters to come.

Please feel free to comment and follow if you feel so inclined.

Technologic, Part 1

View Online

Turing Test stared back at the griffon before her as she and her friends all stood in the meeting room at Vanderbull Industries. He’d called himself “Talon Turing,” and he took a deep breath and just stared at her, a beaming smile on his avian face as he brushed his black crest feathers to the side. He still held her hoof in his claw, raising and lowering it gently, as if testing its weight.Turing Test cocked her head slightly at this, drawing her hoof back and giving a gentle twitch of her ears as she did so, but this only caused Talon Turing to gasp and clutch a claw to his chest.

“Remarkable,” he breathed. “I never imagined…”

Gadget rushed forward, eagerly taking up Talon Turing’s claw in her own mechanical hand and shaking it vigorously, startling him.

“Professor Turing!” she cried. “It’s such an honor! I’m Gadget, the one who wrote to you! I’m so happy you came to meet us! I’m Gadget— aaand I just said that already.” She groaned, dropping Dr. Turing’s claw as she smacked her own forehead with her hoof, her cheeks reddening slightly. “What I mean is, well, I’m really intrigued by your work on computing machines and I am soooo glad you read my letter and that you were available when Twilight and Turing were coming to visit - Turing Test Turing, I mean, not you, Dr. Talon Turing Turing. …Not that Turing. Other Turing.”

Vanderbull cleared his throat loudly and Gadget snapped to attention, finally stopping her prattling. The young mare pushed her glasses up along her muzzle and held her head up.

“So, um, yes. Thank you for coming, sir,” she managed to say.

Talon Turing blinked for a moment, then began laughing, covering his mouth as he did so. The onlookers all relaxed as he gave her a smile.

“Dear me, Miss G-Gadget, you flatter me too much! I’m not some pop idol or anything special. I’m just a simple scientist, a bit of a, well, t-t-tinkerer, you could say.”

Twilight noticed the slight stammer in the griffon’s speech, noting to herself that it was reminiscent of the way Gadget spoke when she became flustered as well. She was starting to wonder if it was a common thing in their profession or maybe they were just birds of a feather (fitting, considering Talon Turing’s species).

Twilight stepped forward, smiling politely as Dr. Turing faced her once again. “So, I guess Gadget asked you to come here and meet Turing Test?” she asked.

“Indeed so.” He raised a feathery eyebrow. “Was my visit unexpected? I haven’t imposed, have I?”

Twilight shook her head. “No. Well, that is, you are unexpected, but you’re not unwelcome at all! I’m very happy to meet you too. After all, in part thanks to Gadget, I named Turing Test after your theory!”

“Well, it’s less of a ‘theory’ and more of an idea, really,” he said, stroking his chin as he glanced over at Turing Test. “Still, I must admit that I am flattered to be the inspiration for your automaton’s name.”

“Robot.”

Talon Turing raised his head slightly, staring at her in confusion.

“I prefer to be identified as a ‘robot.’”

“You… ‘prefer’ it?” He smiled, nodding. “How interesting! Very well then.” He then turned his attention back to Twilight. “Princess Twilight, I, ah, I was wondering if you would grant me a private audience with Turing Test. There is a kind of, ah, a k-kind of experiment I would like to conduct, but before doing anything, I would like to interview her, one on one, to investigate Gadget’s claims. May I have your permission?”

Twilight pursed her lips. “Well, I guess that sounds fine with me, if you just want to talk. But that’s up to Turing Test.” She turned to her robotic companion. “How about it, Turing? Would you be all right with answering some questions?”

Turing Test nodded. “I will comply. It could be highly informative to speak with my namesake.”

“Splendid!” Talon Turing clapped his claws together, rubbing them eagerly. “Well then, Mr. Vanderbull, everypony, could we please have the room?”

They all nodded and started to leave.

“Twilight Sparkle, you will not stay?” Turing asked, causing Twilight to halt and look over her shoulder.

“Oh, well, I guess I could, but Talon Turing did say--”

“Ah, I say,” Talon Turing said, puffing his wings out as he stepped forward, “but perhaps we could simplify this ‘two Turings’ business. Your Highness, you could simply refer to me as ‘Talon’ or ‘Dr. Turing’ or, oh I don’t know, simply ‘Prof’ would suffice. I am used to it, after all. And while we are together, we could refer to Turing Test as just that, or ‘Miss Turing.’”

“‘Lady Turing’ would also be acceptable,” Turing Test said, raising a hoof.

Twilight rolled her eyes. “You didn’t get Rainbow Dash to call you that, so I don’t think we’ll start calling you that now either, Turing Test.”

Turing Test lowered her head. “Acknowledged.”

“In any case, I’m afraid I must ask if we could be alone. I wish for Miss Turing to answer my questions without the benefit of any cues from her caretaker or friends, if that is all right.”

Twilight again looked to Turing Test.

“That is acceptable. I will be glad to oblige.”

That said, Twilight and the others filed out of the room, leaving the two Turings behind. When the door shut behind them, they gathered up in the hallway.

“So, what exactly is it that makes Dr. Turing so important?” Twilight asked, looking to Gadget and Vanderbull.

Gadget and Vanderbull exchanged looks, both raising an eyebrow before they turned back to Twilight.

“Jeez, Twilight,” Gadget said, chuckling, “you mean you don’t even know that much?”

“Hey!” Twilight snapped, giving her a scowl.

“Er, what Gadget means,” Vanderbull said, interjecting (and giving his assistant a reproachful glare), “is that since you named Turing Test after him, or at least his ‘test,’ we assumed you had done more research into his work.”

Twilight looked away, her cheeks reddening. “Er, well, no… not really. I just know he wrote some stuff about robots or thinking machines or something.”

“He did,” Gadget said, “but he’s done a lot more.”

“Like what?”

“Well, his theories on computations have gotten a lot of ponies interested in building more sophisticated computers, especially after his paper on the Entscheidungsproblem--”

“On the what?!”

Vanderbull crossed his arms, rolling his eyes. “I never understand this theoretical mumbo jumbo.”

“It’s not mumbo jumbo, sir, it’s important!” she cried, her mechanical arms flailing about. “It’s… well, it’s all about whether you can solve any logical problem and prove something is true or not with enough axioms. This mathematician named Hill Bird wondered if, with enough time and resources, any problem with a ‘Yes’ or ‘No’ solution could be found. Dr. Turing imagined an automated computer called a ‘Turing Machine’ that would work through the data and try to solve problems.”

“What kind of problems?” Twilight asked.

“Oh, any kind!” Gadget exclaimed, balancing on the edge of her hooves, an increasingly crazed smile on her face. “I mean, it could be as simple as ‘For every X, if X is a pony, then X is not a griffon.’”

“Uhh, but that’s true, isn’t it?”

“Yes, yes, but the point is how can you prove it? And that’s just an example anyway--” She stopped, shaking her head. “Look, the point is, Dr. Turing did a lot of stuff with numbers and imagined this machine that would work through a lot of stuff that no pony could ever do on their own. He figured out two things: first of all, it’s impossible to prove that even with enough axioms, you could solve every single problem. But, more importantly - at least to me - is that he proved that if a problem really can be solved then it’s possible to construct a machine that can solve it.”

Twilight blinked. “Sooo?”

“It means that if a problem has a solution, no matter how complicated it is, then we can find the solution, and computers can answer that for us! And now a bunch of ponies all across Equestria are trying to build computers that can solve some longstanding problems!”

Twilight’s eyes widened. “So, wait, you mean we could make a machine that could solve Starswirl the Bearded’s 3rd Conjecture on the Universality of Polythaumaturgic Nets?”

Gadget blinked. “What?”

Vanderbull chuckled. “Now you know how I feel when you start talking like that, Gadget.”

Gadget frowned, ignoring the comment. “Er, well the answer is, if a solution to it exists, then a computer could calculate it, theoretically. I hear Dr. Turing is working on building a computer like that, too. It’s just too bad the Equestrian government isn’t subsidizing--” Gadget stopped, covering her mouth with her hoof.

Twilight cringed. “Oh. I guess Princess Celestia hasn’t really done that much to support it.”

“Which is weird, really,” Gadget said, using a mechanical hand to scratch behind one of her ears, “since it’s rumored that Dr. Turing used to work for the government.”

Twilight raised her head. “Wait, he did?”

Gadget shrugged. “Well, that’s the rumor. Nopony really knows.”

Twilight mulled this over and glanced at the door, which was still closed. She could barely hear the voices of the two occupants inside as they spoke.

***

Dr. Turing gestured to the nearby chairs around the coffee table in the small meeting room. Turing Test took a seat as the door to the room closed and Dr. Turing took up the seat across from her, rising into the air with some quick flaps of his wings before coming to rest in the large-backed, cushioned chair.

“Now then, shall we begin?”

Turing Test nodded. “I am ready.”

Dr. Turing adjusted his jacket, fidgeting with his wings slightly. “Well then… first let me make sure I have a few facts straight. Miss Gadget’s letters were a little, ah… disorganized, to say the least.” He cleared his throat. “Well, Miss Turing, am I to understand that you still have no idea who built you?”

“Some of the ponies who participated in my creation have been identified. One, designated ‘Fine Print,’ was discovered to be monitoring Twilight Sparkle and me in Ponyville. Another, Blue Blazer, was working at the Manehattan Hall of Science and unsuccessfully attempted to persuade Gadget to join her cause. They are both part of a much larger organization whose purpose for building me and methods for doing so remain unknown.”

Dr. Turing nodded. “I see. I must admit, while they seem like a group of scoundrels, I must compliment them on their achievement.” He smiled. “You, Miss Turing, are an amazing piece of technology. Gadget has sent me reports of your abilities. She says that Princess Twilight has tested both your physical and many mental abilities, in particular your mathematical prowess. Is that true?”

“Affirmative.”

“Then let’s try something a bit more complex than simple multiplication and division.” Dr. Turing took a notepad and a pen from his shirt pocket and began writing, narrowing his eyes in concentration. He gave what he had written an approving nod.

“I have a small equation here. When I show it to you, I want you to calculate the smallest possible value for ‘x+y+z’ in the shortest time possible, assuming x, y, and z are non-zero positive integers. Do you understand?”

“Yes.”

He leaned forward, holding up the paper. On it was the following:

3x = 4y = 7z

“61.”

Dr. Turing dropped the notepad, his eyes bulging. He had barely raised the notepad and was still leaning forward when Turing Test had answered it. She’d answered in less than a second.

“That is c-c-correct,” he managed to say. “My word, Gadget wasn’t exaggerating when she said you were quick.” He chuckled to himself. “That wasn’t a terribly difficult problem, but your speed is remarkable!”

“Thank you.”

He laughed. “‘Thank you,’ ahaha… oh just marvelous!”

Turing Test tilted her head, which prompted Dr. Turing’s laughter to intensify.

“So quick, so lifelike! Oh my… we have electronic calculators that can match your speed, but even they require our input, and such machines are the size of rooms! How is it that you can match their computing power and so much more and remain mobile?”

“I do not know,” she replied. “While I know many of my capabilities and that I am able to develop new ones, I have no data available on how I am able to function. However, my central processing unit, analogous to the organic brain, is split into three functions. My basic functions control my physical movement and interpret data and input. My lower cognitive function passively absorbs and interprets data and runs numerous subroutines based on the information I learn that influence my behavior. My higher cognitive function is responsible for decisions, abstraction, and interaction. The three work in concert with the data stored in my databank, which is essentially my memory. How I am able to do this is still unknown.”

Dr. Turing was nodding the whole time, taking notes on the notepad. “Remarkable. Well then, would you mind if I pick your brain for a bit?”

Turing Test sat bolt upright, her hooves clutching her head. “I must insist that you not attempt disassembly or picking of any kind on me, regardless of your offer of one bit.”

The griffon held up his claws defensively. “No, no, I only meant that I wanted to ask you some questions for a little while!”

Turing slowly lowered her hooves. “My apologies. I still find idiomatic expressions difficult to interpret.”

Dr. Turing nodded. “I see. Well then, I’d like to know more about your friends. You’ve been making friends just as Twilight Sparkle asked you to, correct?”

Turing Test nodded.

“And you claim to have experienced emotions, as well?”

“Correct. I have experienced numerous emotions such as gratitude, sadness, anger, amusement, and affection, among others.”

“So you would say that you have feelings of affection for your friends, then?”

“Yes. They accept me and teach me things that enhance the quality of my existence. For example, these gems on my forelegs,” she said, raising one of them to display it for Dr. Turing, “were a gift from my friend Rarity. I acquired them yesterday here in Manehattan.”

Rubbing his chin, Dr. Turing examined them more carefully. He smiled. “They’re lovely.”

“Thank you.”

“Why do you value them, though? Do they enhance some function?”

Turing paused and looked down at them, noticing the glow from her eyes reflecting off the precious stones. “They enhance my appearance. An ongoing difficulty I have had with making friends or being accepted among organics is my unconventional appearance. It is my hope that these will make me ‘pretty.’”

“‘Pretty?’ That matters to you?”

“Yes. Furthermore, it is normal to be appreciative of a gift from a friend, particularly one that requires significant effort or is acquired at significant expense.”

Dr. Turing frowned, looking up at her. “So you value them because they assist in your primary function of befriending others and because it is normal to be grateful for a gift?”

Turing Test nodded. “That is correct. However, your expression indicates you find fault in that.”

“No, I, ah, I sup-- I suppose that the way you’ve described it is similar to the way organics operate, though I’ve never heard it described so, ah, mathematically. You don’t dress it up.” He sat up, his eyes looking upward as he considered that. “Actually, now that I think about it, that’s actually quite refreshing. Hm.”

“Do you have other inquiries, Dr. Turing?”

He turned his head, as if he’d forgotten that she was there. “Oh, yes, of course. Ah, well, what of ethics? Do you have some sense or code of right and wrong?”

He noticed that Turing Test looked over at the door, the servos in her neck whirring as she glanced at it.

“Twilight Sparkle attempted to give me codes for behavior, a series of three ‘laws,’ but they proved to be inadequate. I am currently operating with no codified parameters that dictate my behavior.”

“But are you able to tell what is right from what is wrong?”

Turing’s ears squeaked as she shifted them up and down on their hinges. “I am able to understand that some things are considered so.”

“Well, what if, for example, I were to make you angry or offend you in some way? Would you then strike me to silence me?”

“No,” she replied immediately. “Physical violence is not an appropriate response in that situation.”

“‘In that situation?’ Then, is it ever acceptable?”

Turing did not move. “I am unable to answer that.”

Talon Turing narrowed his eyes. “Miss Turing… have you personally ever been physically violent?”

Turing Test lowered her ears, casting her gaze downward. “I do not wish to answer that question.”

Dr. Turing took a deep breath. “All right,” he said quietly. “I… um… I am sorry. I meant no offense.”

“Understood.” She lifted her head. “Please proceed with your inquiries.”

“Well, let’s leave off such things. You say you have trouble with idioms, so perhaps I could test your language ability. Would that be all right?”

“Affirmative. You may proceed.”

Dr. Turing cracked his taloned fingers. “I’d like you to consider the following phrase: ‘Time flies like an arrow; and fruit flies like a banana.’” He grinned. “Do you understand the meaning?”

Turing Test tilted her head, her eyes contracting slightly as her ears twitched. “The meaning is… is…” She tapped her chin, metallically. “The phrase is difficult to understand.”

Dr. Turing frowned and heaved a sigh. “I see. Well, if it is too difficult to answer--”

“I wish to answer,” she said, interjecting so suddenly that he gave a start. “I have analyzed that time is an abstract concept that is not capable of traditional flight, and neither are bananas or fruit of any kind capable of flight. I do not believe that the meaning is nonsensical, however.”

He leaned forward. “Go on,” he whispered, fixing his eyes on her. “Try.”

“Scanning memory… I have identified the phrase ‘time flies’ in different variations in numerous texts. Each case corresponds to the perception of time as moving faster or slower than expected, a concept that seems to be unique to inherent weaknesses of organic perception.”

Dr. Turing raised an eyebrow.

“It would seem that the word ‘fly’ in this case is equivalent to this concept of the passage of time. Since arrows travel quickly, this indicates the opinion that time generally passes more quickly than expected or desired. However, that does not explain the second half of the phrase…” Her eyes contracted even further, and a high-pitched whine began to emanate from her.

“It’s quite all right, really, Miss Turing,” Dr. Turing said, holding up a claw.

“But I do not wish to disappoint Twilight Sparkle. If I am unable to answer your questions, she will be unhappy.”

“No, no, it’s all right,” he assured her, getting up from his chair and taking her by the shoulders. “Y-you’ve already performed admirably in understanding the first half of the phrase. I daresay no other machine could understand that much. Some organics might not either, for that matter, so please do not strain yourself.”

The whine began to fade and eventually dissipated completely. “Very well, Dr. Turing. However, I request that you do not tell me the meaning of this idiom. I will attempt to decipher it later.”

He nodded, smiling at her as he stepped back. “It seems that such problems give you a lot of trouble. I shudder to think of how you might fare against a logical paradox.”

Turing Test stared back at him. “I am unfamiliar with that concept.”

“Oh, you know,” he said rolling his hand mildly. “It’s a sort of contradictory statement, like, say, if I were to declare ‘This sentence is false!’”

Turing Test’s head drooped to one side and her eyes shrank to pinpricks. The high-pitched whine was heard again and she stiffly dropped to the side of the chair.

“Oh! Oh my, oh dear, what have I done?!” He flew at the door, yanking it open, spotting the others still waiting outside in the hallway. “Princess Twilight, everypony, come quickly!”

They all dashed inside and found Turing in her frozen state.

“Turing? Turing!” Twilight shouted. “Oh my gosh, what happened?”

“I d-d-d-don’t know, I only gave her an example of a logical p-paradox and she became like this!” Dr. Turing said.

Vanderbull turned to Gadget. “Gadget, suggestions?” he demanded.

“Uhhh…” She scrunched her eyes shut, only to have them pop back open again as she raised one of her mechanical fingers. “Oh, I know! Try turning her off and back on again!”

Twilight whipped her head to look at her. “What? Why would that work?!”

“I don’t hear any other ideas, let’s try it!” Gadget jumped onto the chair and opened the compartment on Turing Test’s back, pressing the large red button and holding it until the robot powered down, her eyes going dim and her body going slack.

They all waited with bated breath as Gadget pressed the button again. Turing’s eyes blinked back on and gradually she began to move and sat back up.

“An unexpected shutdown has occurred. Checking for memory errors… minor errors detected and repaired.” She glanced around and saw the concerned faces of the others. “Twilight Sparkle? What has happened?”

They all breathed a sigh of relief as Dr. Turing came over. “I’m t-terribly sorry Miss Turing. I didn’t know you’d react so terribly to what I said. Do you remember anything of our conversation?”

She nodded. “Affirmative. You and I were discussing various aspects of my existence and ‘picking my brain’ about various information, including my comprehension of idioms. You then made a statement which caused me to go into an infinite loop. For protection, the statement has been deleted from my memory. I will attempt to construct a protective subroutine to cancel such loops.”

“Oh!” Twilight exclaimed. “You mean like that time I asked you to divide something by zero?”

Turing Test turned toward her and leaned in close. “Please do not say things like that, Twilight Sparkle. Even if they no longer cause my systems to freeze, I still do not like them.” Despite Turing’s lack of expressive facial features, Twilight couldn’t help but feel like she was being glared at.

Twilight winced, giving an uncomfortable smile. “Sorry. Dr. Turing and I will be more careful.”

“Yes, of course,” Dr. Turing said, adjusting his tie. “I am terribly sorry, Miss Turing Test. But, I rather think that I’ve learned what I needed to. I would now like to propose a bit more.”

Twilight narrowed her eyes, staring at Dr. Turing. “What do you mean? If it’s going to put Turing Test in danger…”

“No, no, nothing of the sort.” He sat up and puffed up his chest. “You’ve named your robot friend after my proposed ‘Turing Test.’ But do you know what that test actually involves?”

Gadget nodded eagerly, but Twilight only shrugged. “I’m sorry, but I don’t,” Twilight replied. “Gadget told me that it’s some sort of test to see if a machine is intelligent or not, right?”

“That is correct,” he said, “and Miss Gadget, if you would, I’d like you to not reveal the proposed version of the test outlined in my paper. Princess Twilight, if you’re amenable, I’d like to offer Miss Turing Test the chance to take, well, the Turing Test.”

The stunned silence in the room was broken by Gadget’s snickering.

“So, Talon Turing wants Turing Test to take the Turing Test? I wonder what will happen when Turing Test tests Turing’s Turing test.”

They all stared at her blankly, save for Vanderbull, who groaned and put his palm to his face.

“W-well, I thought it was funny,” she mumbled, turning away.

“As I was saying,” Dr. Turing continued, “in my short interview with Turing Test I see a lot of evidence that she might, in fact, be an intelligent being. However, this was only a preliminary measure. In the interest of being more thorough and scientific, I’d like to take things a step further.”

Twilight glanced back at Turing Test, then back to Dr. Turing. “With all due respect, sir, I’m confident that Turing is intelligent. I don’t really see the point.”

“Excuse me, Twilight Sparkle,” Turing said, hopping off her seat, her metal hooves clattering on the hard floor, “but I would like to ask Dr. Turing more about this test.”

Twilight raised an eyebrow, but nodded. “Okay, Turing. If you want to.”

“Thank you. Dr. Turing, while I am happy to have Twilight Sparkle’s approval, many doubt that I am intelligent or sentient or capable of thoughts or emotions. You also appear to be unconvinced. If I were to pass your test, would that prove that I am intelligent?”

Dr. Turing furrowed his brow. “Well, it wouldn’t necessarily, ah, definitively prove anything. But it might give us far greater insight into your inner workings and help me to test my own hypothesis. I admit, there may be nothing to gain, but if you perform well, it could very well strengthen your argument that you are, in fact, a thinking being.”

“That’s right, Turing!” Gadget said, coming to her side. “With empirical evidence and something solid on your side, we just might be able get everypony to see you in a new light!”

Turing was quiet for a moment as she glanced to each one of them, coming to Twilight last of all and lingering her gaze on her. Then, at last, she turned back to Dr. Turing.

“With Twilight Sparkle’s permission, I would like to participate. When and where will it be held?”

Talon Turing clapped his hands together. “Oh, I’m so happy you’ve agreed! Well, I’m afraid that the test would be in Trottingham. My colleagues and I have a laboratory set up near King Bullion’s College at Cambridle University. We could be ready relatively quickly at your convenience. I daresay, if you’ll come back to Trottingham with me this afternoon, we could begin the test tomorrow.”

Twilight tapped her chin. “Well, I was going to go back to Ponyville today, but I guess I didn’t have any major plans for at least a few days.” She looked at Turing Test again and broke into a smile. “This is really important to you, isn’t it, Turing?”

She nodded. “I believe this to be a significant opportunity to prove myself publicly.”

Twilight placed a hoof to her chest. “Then I’ll guess I’ll have to send a telegram to Spike and my friends in Ponyville to let them know we’ll be delayed and then we’ll be glad to join you in Trottingham, Dr. Turing,” she said.

“Yes, yes, of course!” he exclaimed, bowing to her. “Oh, and since you were responsible for this introduction, Miss Gadget,” he said, turning to the bespectacled young mare, “I’d like to extend the invitation to witness the test to you as well.”

Gadget gasped, but froze and bit her lip. “O-oh, well, that would be wonderful, Dr. Turing, but I… I mean, I’ve got work to do here and I just took some time off and I’m sure Mr. Vanderbull needs me to--”

There was a hand on her shoulder and she turned to see Vanderbull crouching and looking at her, a warm smile on his face. “Go with them, Gadget,” he said.

“S-sir? I mean… no, that’s too kind of you,” she said, waving her hooves (and her mechanical arms) in objection. “I mean, we just had a security breach and I know you’ll need help with--”

“Gadget, I am going to spend the next few days tightening up our security and questioning various employees about whom I have doubts. But since you are one of those whom I certainly can trust, I see no reason for you to linger here.” He stood back to his full height, crossing his arms behind his back. “Go with them. Take notes. Learn as much as you can and return here freshly inspired. That is an order, Gadget.”

Swallowing a lump in her throat, Gadget held her composure and clicked her hooves together, saluting with one mechanical hand. “Yes sir!”

“Then it seems our little party has been settled,” Dr. Turing said. “Let us gather our things and I will meet you all at the train station. We’ll take the 4:15 to Trottingham. Now, if you’ll excuse me,” he added, stretching his wings as he moved for the door, “I have been told of some wonderful things to see and do here in Manehattan and I should like to experience them before we leave. I’ve heard much about the Manehattan take on pizza, for instance…”

***

Twilight rolled over in her bed, tossing off the sheets as she sat up, feeling herself jostled by the gentle rumblings of the train. She looked down and saw Turing Test sitting by the window, looking out at the countryside as it passed. The robot glanced up at her, noticing her movement. Gently, Twilight peeked over the side of her bunk and to the lower bunk, where Gadget was lying in her own bed, limbs akimbo and mouth hanging open.

“I guess Gadget isn’t having any trouble sleeping,” Twilight whispered.

“That is correct,” Turing replied quietly. “She has shown no response to the movement of the train and has not been disturbed by any ambient sounds.”

“I’m not surprised,” Twilight said with a yawn. She rubbed her eyes gently. “She didn’t sleep very well at all last night. I’m glad to see she’s resting now. Sure wish I could do the same!”

Turing tilted her head. “You also received less sleep than usual last night, Twilight Sparkle. Why are you unable to rest?”

“I guess I never sleep too well on trains for one thing,” she said, gingerly climbing down the ladder, careful not to make too much noise and risk waking up Gadget. “And for another, I guess I’ve just got a lot on my mind. I’m going to the dining car. If they’re still open, maybe I can get some water, or maybe some herbal tea.”

“Would you like me to accompany you?”

Twilight smiled, but shook her head. “That’s all right, Turing. I’d like a little time to myself, if you don’t mind.”

“I do not. Please enjoy your tea, if it is available.” That said, she turned back to the window.

Twilight was about to leave when she paused and looked back at the mechanical mare. “Say, Turing Test...?”

“As you wish: Turing Test.”

“No, I mean--”

“That was a joke. Ha ha.”

Twilight rolled her eyes, but chuckled nonetheless. “Cute. But seriously, there’s something I wanted to ask you.”

“What is it, Twilight Sparkle?” she asked, turning around to give Twilight her full attention.

“Well, I guess I still don’t understand why you’re doing this. I mean, I’m curious about what Dr. Turing has planned as well, but this could… I mean…” She trailed off, causing Turing Test to step closer.

“You are concerned. I do not understand the reason. If I am able to pass this test, it may well prove that I am intelligent and have a place among organics.”

Twilight swallowed. “Yes. If you pass, that might be the case.”

Turing continued to stare at Twilight, even as she fidgeted, looking away slightly. After a moment, it clicked.

“I understand. You are concerned about what will happen if I do not pass.”

“Well, why wouldn’t I be? If the benefit of passing is that you’re accepted as intelligent, then failing the test could mean that nopony will take you seriously again!” Twilight’s pupils constricted as she stared off into space. “What if Dr. Turing publishes a report? What if Celestia reads it? Oh gosh, what if all of Equestria reads it?!”

Turing Test watched her as she began to hyperventilate. She’d heard it said that Twilight was prone to stress regarding tests; it seemed those rumors were true.

“Twilight Sparkle, do you believe that I am intelligent?”

Twilight paused and turned to face her. “Of course I do!”

“Then there is no need for concern. I will pass.”

“But--”

“I will prove myself.” That said, she turned back to the window. “You should get your tea and relax.”

Twilight looked away, a frown on her face. “Turing, I’m sorry, I… I didn’t mean anything by it. I’m just worried about you. That’s all.”

Turing Test said nothing, but continue to stare out the window. At last, Twilight heaved a sigh and walked out the door, shutting it behind her.

She walked down the center aisle of the train, feeling it shift and rumble under her hooves. The trip to Trottingham from Manehattan had proved even longer than she’d suspected. Dr. Turing had sent word to King’s College and quarters had been set up for them, but it would still be after midnight until they arrived. It was for that reason that Gadget and Twilight had both tried to get some sleep that evening.

Twilight yawned again as she walked into the dining car. A single unicorn stallion wearing a black vest and bow tie was behind the counter of the spacious dining car cabin. The rest of the tables placed around it were unoccupied… or so she thought, until she saw a familiar griffon sitting alone in the corner, writing notes on his notepad.

“Dr. Turing!” Twilight exclaimed.

He looked up from the notepad and smiled. “Princess Twilight! I thought you’d g-gone to bed!”

“I thought you had too,” she said, returning his smile. “I guess neither one of us felt like napping.”

“Yes, quite.” He stood and pulled out a chair for her. She bowed graciously and took a seat. “Would you like cup of chamomile tea? Our host has a kettle on for me.”

“I’d love some, thank you,” she replied. “That’s just what I was looking for.”

“Wonderful!” He looked over to the stallion behind the counter. “Another c-cup for Her Highness, please?”

The stallion bowed and a moment later the tea kettle began to whistle. He levitated it and poured two cups of tea on saucers and levitated them both deftly over to Twilight and Dr. Turing without spilling a drop.

“Sugar?” the stallion asked, levitating some sugar cubes.

“I’ll take two,” Twilight said.

“And three for me,” Dr. Turing said. “My m-mother always said I had a sweet beak.”

Twilight chuckled as the sugar cubes floated over and dropped gently into their tea.

“So then, Princess Twilight,” Dr. Turing began. “What is it that has kept you up tonight?”

“You can just call me Twilight,” she said. “I still don’t really like all the official titles unless I’m doing something… um… ‘Princessy.’”

Dr. Turing laughed. “Ah, how charming! Very well, Twilight. So, as to my question?”

Twilight took a sip of her tea. “I’m worried about Turing Test. Er, about Miss Turing taking the Turing Test.”

“Ah. I see. You worry that her failure could be the cause of, ah, unforeseen c-consequences.”

She lowered her head. “Yes. I’m worried.”

“I sup-suppose that you could withdraw her from the test, if you wish.”

“I would, but Turing Test wants to try. If I don’t let her, I think it would hurt her feelings. In fact, I think I already hurt her feelings by telling her I was worried that she wouldn’t pass.”

Dr. Turing smiled. “How extraordinary,” he whispered, taking a sip of his own tea.

“Huh? What do you mean?”

He swallowed, setting the cup back on the table as he steepled his clawed fingers and leaned forward on the small table. “She values your opinion and has the capacity to be offended, or at least to act like she is. She certainly seems intelligent to me.”

“Then,” Twilight swallowed, leaning forward, “why don’t you just say that she is intelligent?”

Dr. Turing frowned and leaned back.

“We don’t need to take this test, Dr. Turing, you can just say she’s intelligent and everypony will believe--”

“T-Twilight, please…”

“You’re the expert! If you can just say that, then it’ll be enough, and she won’t need to worry!”

He folded his arms, closing his eyes. “That won’t work, and even if it did, I w-wouldn’t do it.”

Twilight leaned closer. “Dr. Turing, please!”

The griffon opened his eyes and saw the telltale glimmer of tears forming in Twilight’s eyes.

“Prin-- Twilight, you must understand,” he said, uncrossing his arms, “that my opinion is just that. A more rigorous test would be needed, or else it would m-merely be the word of a single griffon with nothing more to back it up than intuition. I can’t believe that would satisfy the whole of Equestria, the scientific community, or even Miss T-T-Turing herself! Or you!”

Twilight opened her mouth to reply, but then shut it and lowered her head. “No. I guess it wouldn’t.” She took a deep breath. “I’m sorry. I’m… I’m just worried.”

He smiled. “I understand. Listen, there are many things she does that make me think she could do well on the test and, again, I see signs that she might be intelligent.”

Twilight mulled that over and took another sip of tea. “What do you mean ‘might be?’”

“Well, she displays the ability to learn and reason and certainly claims to have emotions and seems to have a sense of herself, all of which indicate intelligence. But she is also obtuse in many ways and the way she describes her reasons for her actions is all very, well, ‘by the numbers,’ so to speak. She said she was grateful for the brooches on her forelegs because they served a purpose and because, as she said, it was normal to be grateful for a gift.” He sighed.

“Well, it is, though,” Twilight replied. “What’s wrong with that?”

“Come now, Twilight. W-when someone does something nice, are you happy because some rule states you ought to be happy?”

“What?” She made a face at that. “Of course not! I’m happy because, well, it’s nice to be thought of, or… I mean… I don’t really need a reason to be happy, do I?”

“Perhaps not. But Turing Test seems to think otherwise. I am curious if she is genuinely having those emotions or if she is displaying them in an effort to seem more like real ponies.”

Twilight narrowed her eyes. “You think that’s what she’s doing?”

“I don’t, I d-don’t,” he drew himself up, trying to steady himself. “I don’t think anything at this point. I can only wonder about it. I’ve just m-met her today, and th-th-that’s not enough to conclude anything! I know that her d-directive is to make friends, so it may well be that she has taken steps to appear to be an emotional, thinking being, but it may all be a very convincing illusion, brought on by sophisticated programming and algorithms more complex than even I could fathom!”

Twilight looked away for a moment, but then, to Dr. Turing’s surprise, she smiled. “No. Turing Test has a mind of her own. She has emotions and she is intelligent. I don’t have any doubts.”

Dr. Turing smiled back. “To be honest, Twilight, I am of the same opinion. I simply would like some data to back up any formal assertions. You know,” he said, holding up his teacup, “that when I was small, I had a book my mother gave me. Natural Wonders Every Foal Should Know, it was called. It described the workings of the body as those of the functions of a machine. In so many ways, I began to think of our own physiology in those terms. If that’s the case, if we too are machines of a sort, then I think we have quite a lot in common with Miss Turing, and she with us.”

Twilight nodded. “I guess that’s true, in a way.” She relaxed, sitting back as she took a sip of tea. “I’m sorry for getting emotional.”

“It’s q-quite all right,” Dr. Turing replied. “You worry for your friend. I certainly know the value of companionship. I imagine Miss Turing does as well.”

“Mm hmm.” Twilight gulped down her cup, looking over at the host behind the counter. “This is good tea. Think I could get another cup?”

“Yes, Your Highness. There is still some left.” He poured her a cup and set it back on the table for her, the two lumps of sugar already in it.

Twilight stirred her tea and noticed that Dr. Turing was staring out the window, a distant look in his eyes.

“Dr. Turing? Are you all right?”

“Hm?” He turned back to her slowly. “What? Oh, yes. I suppose I was just thinking of… well, let’s just say this all reminds me of times gone by.”

Twilight raised an eyebrow. “In what way?”

“Well, I… ah, forgive me, I don’t wish to bother you with my troubles.”

Twilight put her hoof to her chest. “I’m the Princess of Friendship. Helping ponies - or griffons! - with their troubles is what I do!”

“Well, this is more of an older matter,” he said, smiling, “but if you insist.” He rubbed his chin, deciding how to start. “I once had a classmate back when I was a younger griffon. Barely more than a fledgling, honestly. He was a pegasus with a keen interest in mathematics, much like myself, and we were the best of friends. We spent almost all of our time together and he m-made those rather difficult days at school bearable, even enjoyable.”

Twilight smiled warmly. “He sounds nice.”

“He… he was nice,” Dr. Turing said, his voice becoming quieter. “His name was Mist Toucher. He was the most important one in my life and I had hopes that we would eventually study together in university, but…” He paused, swallowing a lump in his throat. “But he suddenly died just after graduation.”

Twilight gasped. “Oh. Oh no, Dr. Turing…”

“It-it-it was tuberculosis. Poor lad had it as a child. Never told me. Probably knew I’d worry about it.” He gave a wry laugh, placing a claw over his beak, staring back out the window.

Twilight placed her hoof over his other claw. “I’m so sorry. I can tell he must have been a very special friend.”

“Oh, he was more than just a friend.”

He waited as Twilight processed that. Her eyes widened momentarily. “Oh, I see. I didn’t realize you, were, um…”

“You’re not disturbed by that, are you?” he asked, raising an eyebrow.

She smiled and shook her head. “No, of course not. I just was surprised. I didn’t know.” She held out her hoof. “Please, continue.”

“Yes, well, after he passed away, I… I continued to feel as though Mist were watching over me. When I would go flying along our old routes between our boarding school and town, I… I-I-I felt as though he were flying with me, as we used to all those times before.”

Twilight looked out the window as well. “It’s funny you mention this. Just last night, Turing Test asked me if she had a soul.”

Dr. Turing turned toward her slightly. “Oh? And what did you say?”

She shrugged. “I said I didn’t know the answer and that she should make up her own mind.”

He smiled. “A good approach.” He turned back to the window. “Nowadays, I admit that I don’t hold much faith in the notion of the soul. But back then, I was obsessed. I wondered how the soul would connect to the body, what sort of mechanism bound us to our souls, and indeed, to our minds. I felt the need to, ah, to divine the solution to the question of, if Mist Toucher truly was still with me, then in what state did his mind still exist?

“From there, I began to contemplate the existence of minds in general, and wondered how else they might manifest. Could they only exist in organic matter, in the brain? Could they exist in some form of energy? In some other structure? Could we create an artificial mind? An electrical mind? And that’s what fascinated me with the notion of automated computers and, in turn, with the idea of thinking machines. That is what compelled me, eventually, to posit my ideas about machine intelligence. Perhaps somepony else had a similar idea and gave birth to what is now Miss Turing.”

Twilight was quiet as she stared out the window. The countryside was a sweeping blanket of darkness barely illuminated by the passing lights from the train cast out over the fields and plains. Overhead, the stars glimmered innumerably.

The two sat in silence as they watched the world pass by.

Dr. Turing finally broke the silence as he drank the last of his tea. “We’ll be in Trottingham soon, Twilight. Perhaps we should both get a little rest before we arrive.”

Twilight nodded, finishing her own tea. “Yes, you’re right. Thank you.”

Dr. Turing blushed slightly. “Um… I am sorry for the morose nature of our conversation. I’m sure it wasn’t what you wished to hear.”

She smiled and shook her head. “No, not at all. I know it sounds strange, but it actually makes me feel a little more calm. I’m still worried about Turing Test, but you made me feel a little better about this situation. And I admit that I feel a little better knowing more about you, Dr. Turing. To be honest, at first I wasn’t sure what sort of griffon you were, but now I really think you’ve got a good heart. That’s why I know Turing Test will be in good hoov-- claws.”

The two of them laughed. “I am relieved to hear that. Good night, Twilight Sparkle.”

“Good night, Talon.”

The two of them went their separate ways, and Twilight returned to the sleeper car, opening the door to her own room, and saw Turing Test still sitting at the window and Gadget still laid out in bed.

“You are back, Twilight Sparkle,” Turing Test whispered. “Did you enjoy your tea?”

Twilight nodded. She trotted over and put a foreleg over Turing’s shoulders.

“Twilight Sparkle?”

“I’m sorry about earlier, Turing Test,” she said, looking out the window with her. “I didn’t mean to doubt you. I was just afraid. But I’m going to stop worrying about it and just let you handle everything. Just do your best and I’m sure you can pass any test they throw at you.”

“I agree. Though I doubt any test they give will involve throwing.”

Twilight chuckled. “Good joke, Turing.”

“That was not a joke.”

Twilight facehooved loud enough that Gadget woke up with a start and fell out of bed.

“Huzzamuzza yessir Vister Mandible, sir…” she managed to mutter before falling back to sleep, facedown on the floor.

Twilight gave the sleeping girl a lopsided look, one eye twitching. “Well at least somepony can get a good night’s rest around here,” she grumbled.

***

When the train finally pulled into the station at Trottingham, it was after 1 o’clock in the morning. Twilight led the group, still rubbing her eyes, with Turing and Gadget in tow. Gadget was holding up their bags with her mechanical arms, while Turing carried the rest. Gadget in particular was still groggy, which is why she blindly walked forward until she bumped into Twilight, who had halted on the platform.

“Huh, whatgives Twi’ight?” she muttered, glancing up. She was awake in an instant.

A dozen members of the Royal Guard were all standing at attention. Additionally, a few purple-clad members of the Night Guard were among them.

Twilight frowned. “Huh? What’s going on?”

“Forgive us, Your Highness,” said the leader of the group as he stepped forward. “We’re just here to escort you to your destination. Given the recent activity of the conspirators you encountered, Her Majesty Princess Celestia asked that we see to your protection.”

Twilight sighed. “Fine. I suppose that should be all right.”

They turned when they heard the flapping of wings and some of the Guard tensed up. They all relaxed when they saw Talon Turing flying over.

“Good heavens!” he exclaimed. “Is everything all right?”

“They’re just here to take us to Cambridle, Dr. Turing,” Twilight replied.

One of the Night Guards cleared his throat and came over. “Actually, Dr. Turing, we need to speak to you for a moment.”

Dr. Turing stiffened, as if standing at attention, and his expression was stony. “Very well.” He nodded to Twilight and the others. “Please go on ahead. I will be with you shortly.”

Twilight looked to the two Night Guards uncertainly, but did as she was asked. When the others had left, Dr. Turing leaned in closely.

“What is the meaning of this?” he hissed.

“Princess Celestia got your message, Dr. Turing,” said one.

“She felt it necessary to have this delivered in person,” said the other. He held an envelope in his hoof. The envelope had an ornate sun-shaped emblem on it.

“Ah. A Royal reply, as it were.” He nodded and took the envelope, gently tearing it open with his talon and drawing out the letter. He read it and slowly began to smile. “I see,” he said at last. “Very well. You may convey to Her Majesty that I will obey her orders to the letter.”

They both nodded and saluted. Before they left, however, the second of them said, “Oh, and by the way, Dr. Turing?”

“Hm, yes?” he asked.

“Equestria owes you its thanks. Even if they don’t know it.” He smiled. “But we in the Night Guard haven’t forgotten.”

He smiled. “That’s very kind of you. Perhaps someday others will know what we did. Some,” he said, looking down at the letter, “sooner than others.”

He read back over the line of the telegram that had most caught his eye:

“...hereby granted permission to discuss your work exclusively with H.R.H. Princess Twilight. As a Princess, she has the right to know what went on in those days…”

To be continued...

Author's Notes:

Hope you've all enjoyed this start to a new arc! Next time, it's Miss Turing Test versus the Turing Test!

And now for references:

-Easy one is the title. You guessed it - Daft Punk strikes again.

-Talon Turing, as has been discussed, is based off of the great Alan Turing, about whom I've tried to do a lot of research between last chapter's update and this one. I hope I've successfully portrayed a suitable homage.

-Cambridle is a reference to the well-known UK University Cambridge, while the specific school where Turing studied, King Bullion's College is named after King's College, where his real-life counterpart studied. It gets it's name from King Bullion, who is mentioned in one of the MLP novels as Princess Platinum's father.

-Mist Toucher is based on Christopher Morcom, who was Alan Turing's first love as a young man. Alan Turing was profoundly affected by Morcom's death, and Talon's description of how he was affected mirrors Alan's as well.

-In fact, a lot of the stuff about Turing that made its way into this chapter can be found in Andrew Hodges' book Alan Turing: The Enigma which is great, but very VERY thick.

A big thank you goes out to reader JFalk who pointed me toward some other resources that helped me to know what the hell I was talking about.

Citations:
+Some of the descriptions of Turing's work and the Entscheidungsproblem.
+The mathematical problem Talon gives to Turing Test. (Believe me, I'm not mathematically inclined enough to come up with that, or the answer, on my own.)

Technologic, Part 2

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Twilight was breathing heavily and she was glad when Dr. Turing finally set down after a 20-minute flight out over the countryside nearby Trottingham. Though Dr. Turing was not old, he certainly wasn’t as young as Twilight either, and yet he flew with the speed and confidence of a young pegasus.

After he’d come by at around 8 o’clock that morning at the University Arms Hotel, Dr. Turing had taken her, Gadget, and Turing Test out to breakfast (not that Turing Test needed to eat, as she’d needlessly reminded them). While Gadget and Turing Test took a tour of the campus, the good doctor promised to show Twilight something “special.” In about an hour, they’d meet back up at the Cambridle sciences building.

“You…” she began, gasping for air, “you’re faster than you look, Dr. Turing.”

Dr. Turing went over to her, offering her a handkerchief to wipe her brow, which she accepted. “Oh, m-my apologies,” he said. “I used to be on the aerial relay team as a student and I still make it a point to fly to and from my flat. I prefer it to taking a carriage, you see.”

She took a deep breath, letting her heart rate return to normal. She looked around and saw that Dr. Turing had led her to a wooded area with a simple dirt trail leading through the tall grass and weeds.

“Um… this is nice and all, but I was sort of hoping you were going to show me something in downtown Trottingham,” Twilight said, rubbing her chin. “What’s all the way out here?”

Dr. Turing opened his mouth to reply when they both heard a rustling and saw a reddish-orange earth pony stallion in a simple straw hat and overalls come out from behind a tree.

“‘Ello there, mate!” the stallion said. “You out for a stroll? Don’t suppose you’ve gotten lost, ‘ave you?”

“Oh no, quite the opposite,” Dr. Turing replied. He held open his tweed jacket subtly and the stallion gave the slightest nod.

“Well, if you say so, mate. You just stick to the trail, now.” He then walked off as quickly as he’d come.

Twilight furrowed her brow. “Is it just me or did that seem a little… I don’t know… odd?”

Dr. Turing nodded. “It wasn’t, but you’ll understand soon. Please, follow me.”

The two went a little further up the path when they heard a clear, high song from some unseen bird. Then, to Twilight’s surprise, Dr. Turing stopped in his tracks and gave a birdcall in response. But, she noted, not the same birdcall.

And then a third call came back and Dr. Turing continued walking. Before long, they came to a long, plain looking building with small, darkened windows. Dr. Turing reached into his pocket and retrieved a single key, inserting it into the door’s lock and turning it. He opened the door and beckoned Twilight inside.

The interior was simple, with plain wooden tables and bare brick walls. An old radiator was in the corner and a cork bulletin board was on the wall. Nothing was on it, but numerous pushpins were still embedded into it. In the far corner of the room was a tall, rectangular shape about the size of a large bookcase with a sheet over it. There was also a safe by the wall.

“What is this place, Dr. Turing?” Twilight asked, her voice a whisper. She didn’t know why she was whispering, exactly, but something about Dr. Turing’s stiff mannerisms made her feel cautious and somewhat anxious. She fidgeted where she stood as Dr. Turing kept silent, locking the door behind him.

“I apologize, Princess Twilight,” he said, bowing slightly. “I was not able to speak until I was certain that we were away from all prying eyes.”

Twilight tensed up. “Why?” she asked, narrowing her eyes. “Tell me, what’s going on here?”

“Please relax,” Dr. Turing said. “This has all been mere protocol. You are in no danger.” He smiled. “Welcome, Princess Twilight, to Brindley Park, Hut #6!”

Twilight blinked. “I… I’m sorry, but I don’t understand what that means. This is a park?” She looked around the room, making a face. “No offense, but I think Gadget and Turing Test got the better tour.”

“Oh, I’ve no doubt that their tour will be enjoyable, but I think you should find this a bit more exciting than you realize.” He cleared his throat. “Princess Twilight, Brindley Park is a top secret site kept by the Night Guard. It is off-limits to the public and anypony who was involved in the goings-on here has sworn an oath to never reveal what took place without Her Highness’s permission. And I have obtained that permission; Princess Celestia has entrusted me to inform you.”

Twilight blinked. “What?” she asked flatly.

“Ah, y-yes, I suppose that might have been a bit much,” he said, clearing his throat. “Let me start a bit more simply.” He scratched his head idly, eyes turning up as he considered what to say.

“All right,” he said, beginning again, “have you ever heard of something called the Centaurian Raider Encroachment?”

Twilight tapped her chin. “Um… I’m not sure. I think I remember hearing it once or twice. It was some minor thing at the Equestrian and Saddle Arabian border, right?”

“You’re right about the location,” Dr. Turing said, nodding slightly. Then his face grew more grave as his eyes narrowed. “But you are wrong in saying that it was minor. It was, in fact, the closest this country had come to war in quite some time.”

Twilight’s eyes went wide. “What? A war?! How could that be? Ponies would have heard about it!”

“Not in this case,” Dr. Turing said. “Allow me to explain:

“Near the border between Equestria and Saddle Arabia is also the border of the Centaur Kingdom. I’m sure you’re already familiar with one particularly nasty immigrant of that nation: a certain magic-stealing, red-faced brute named Tirek.”

Twilight scowled. “Yes.”

“Well, despite his example, most of the Centaurs are rather kind. They mostly keep to themselves and, as a result, contact between their homeland and Equestria is minimal. However, about ten years ago, a band of raiders crossed over from their border and into Equestria. They struck many small towns and villages, pillaging them and leaving destruction in their wake before returning back over the border where they could not be pursued. These attacks were coordinated, quick, and, ah, precise. We realized they must be more organized than the average, run-of-the-mill bandits.

“Due to the sensitivity of the situation and Her Majesty’s desire to avoid an international incident, the Night Guard was called in to covertly investigate. What they found was that these raiders were a much larger force than could be reasonably expected. They were, for all intents and purposes, a militia. And, what’s more, they were using code.

“Not just any code, mind you. This code was extraordinarily complex, constantly changing, and utterly indecipherable by ordinary methods. They transmitted it to each other by makeshift telegraphs, lanterns, semaphore, or whatever other methods they had. Covertly, of course, many of these messages were picked up by the Night Guard. But nopony had any idea of what was being said. And as the raids grew bolder, more frequent, and even more… well, v-violent,” he said, heaving a sigh, “it was clear that the codes had to be deciphered and broken. And that’s when the Guard got their hooves on something unlike anything they’d ever seen.”

Dr. Turing went to the safe and began to turn the dial on it, inputting the combination to open it. The old door squeaked loudly as he opened it and took out a device, placing it on a nearby wooden table.

The device looked like a small suitcase, but Dr. Turing opened it and inside Twilight could see that it looked a bit like a typewriter. There were small keys, a plugboard with letters on it, and, she noted, four large gears.

“Princess, what I’ve laid before you is called the Enigma Machine,” Dr. Turing continued. “Nopony knows how, but the Centaurs devised this machine and used it to encode and decode messages. They would set it up differently each and every day according to a guide book which, I’m sorry to say, we were utterly unable to obtain. But, ah, the point is that the possible settings for it were extraordinarily complex. An early one could be set up in over 17,000 ways. This one, acquired by a daring infiltrator, could go over 400,000. And near the end, they even had one that could give up to 150 trillion different unique settings! Even if you could somehow guess the message, it would just change the next day. The Night Guard did not have the resources or know-how to defeat such a dreadful thing. So, they called a group of cryptanalysts from around Equestria to help.”

Twilight smiled. “Including you,” she surmised, nodding appreciatively.

He laughed. “Indeed so. The Night Guard called upon me after reading some of my papers and brought me to this place.”

“So, this is why those two Night Guards came to see you at the train station yesterday,” Twilight said.

“And, you might have guessed, that fellow we met along the way here and the ‘birds’ you heard were members of the Guard as well. This place is secluded, but still occasionally used to train new recruits. Nonetheless, it is classified and I needed to request permission to show it to you. On that note, Her Majesty has specified that while you, as a Princess, are to be entrusted with this information, she requests that your companions or friends in Ponyville not be made aware of it, and especially what I’m about to tell you next unless absolutely necessary.”

Twilight nodded, placing her hoof upon her chest solemnly. “Of course,” she replied.

He nodded, the tension in his body lessening slightly. “Might I ask,” he continued, “what you know of the Night Guard?”

“Actually,” Twilight replied, “Princess Celestia told me about the Night Guard not long after my coronation. To most ponies nowadays, the Night Guard is just the branch of the Royal Guard that attends to Princess Luna. But before Luna had returned, I remembered stories that I heard as a filly. Just a bunch of old nags’ tales about scary, shadowy ponies with gray coats, bat wings, yellow eyes, and purple armor. The other foals said they were spooks and boogieponies that would come snatch up bad colts and fillies.”

Dr. Turing covered his beak, stifling a laugh. Twilight chuckled.

“But Celestia told me the truth: the Night Guard never stopped existing, even after Nightmare Moon’s banishment.”

“Quite right!” Dr. Turing said, nodding, apparently pleased that Twilight was in the know. “Instead of disbanding the Night Guard, Celestia repurposed them to serve as the covert wing of the Royal Guard. The Royal Guard protects the nation publicly by day while the Night Guard handles things more, um… discreetly.”

A thought suddenly occurred to Twilight: she knew there were numerous divisions and, though she didn’t know it for certain, she now suspected that the ‘RMCA’ that Bon Bon had been part of was one such division.

“Moving on,” Dr. Turing continued, drawing Twilight out of her thoughts, “we soon found that even with some of the best c-cryptanalysts in Equestria here, we were still out of our depth. I personally came up with a system of ‘cribs’ - educated guesses, really - about some common words. For some reason, they were quite focused on the weather, so that word, ‘weather’ came up quite often. And we also discovered that the Enigma never encoded a letter as itself, so that, alongside those guesses, cut down the number of possibilities considerably.

“However, I’d heard of some other rudimentary machines that I believed could assist us. It seemed logical, really, to defeat one nefarious machine with another. Drawing up some plans and requests, we asked the Night Guard to provide us with such a machine. They did so, but at great cost and effort. Still, it worked marvelously.”

He winked and walked over to the large object under the sheet. He pulled it away and Twilight gasped.

The machine was indeed the same size and dimension of a large bookcase, but instead of shelves, it contained several rows of cylindrical rotors, each one marked with all the letters of the alphabet around it.

“This machine is called a bombe. Not like the exploding ones, of course,” Dr. Turing continued. “As I recall, they called it that because of all the noise the infernal thing makes. But the point is, we could make some guesses about what some of the letters might be encoded as and then feed it through the machine to work through all possible combinations. If there were no contradictions, it would complete and give us a deciphered message. If not, we had to try it again and again until we got something that made sense.”

Twilight nodded, her face lighting up. “That’s brilliant! So, once you got this machine, you deciphered their messages and stopped the raiders!”

Heaving a sigh, Dr. Turing shook his head. “Not quite. You see, they only had the budget to provide one machine. With all the messages flying back and forth, we were still going about it too slowly, especially if our guesses were off the mark. The raiders were getting worse and worse and we were not stopping them quickly enough. And while the Centaur Kingdom denied any connection to the raiders, they didn’t seem that keen on stopping them, though they claimed otherwise. If Equestrian forces had chased them across the border, however, we’d have been risking war. Even the offer to help as part of a joint operation was rebuffed!

“But still the Night Guard commanders were reluctant to ask Her Majesty for more bombes, believing that she would not be in favor of spending so much public money on these machines. Her mistrust of technology was well known, you see, and frankly many of the commanders shared that attitude. At my wits’ end, I realized that things were on the brink of disaster and we were being asked to do the impossible. And s-so, I…” He paused and swallowed. “I personally sent a letter to Princess Celestia herself, circumventing the chain of command entirely and stressing the need for more bombes.”

Twilight gasped. “And… what happened?”

The griffon straightened his tie and puffed out his chest, slightly fluffing out his wings. “In fact, she surprised us all and ordered the Guard to give us all we asked. ‘Action this very day!’ she wrote. And so we got over a dozen new bombes and went from just a few decoded messages to hundreds of them!”

Twilight wore a smile. “So, you finally beat the raiders.”

“Indeed so,” Dr. Turing said, a hint of smugness in his voice as he raised his chin. “It turned out the raiders were not sanctioned by the Centaurian government, but it was unwilling to invest the time and money into stopping them. However, we learned of a major raid on Saddle Arabian territory and while the Centaur Kingdom was resolute in not letting us across their border, the Saddle Arabians were more than happy to join in a large ambush. The raiders, unaware that we’d ‘read their mail,’ were caught off guard, quickly subdued, and some of their top leaders apprehended. What was left of their organization fell apart quickly thereafter.”

Twilight placed her hoof on Dr. Turing’s shoulder. “So you prevented a war! You’re a national hero and… and nopony even knows it!” she cried.

“Oh, n-no, it, ah, it was not me, you give me t-too much credit,” Dr. Turing stammered. “It was the combined effort of my colleagues and I, not to mention the bravery of the Night Guard. And,” he added, with a smile, “Her Majesty herself, long may she reign. Without Princess Celestia’s assistance, I shudder to think of what might have happened.”

He stretched his wings, flying up and draping the sheet back over the bombe.

“Princess Celestia wished for you to know more about the goings-on of this nation and the means of making it safe. Though it is well known that Her Majesty is c-cautious… ah, perhaps overly so about technology, you must understand that she is not immovable and does recognize its uses. If you are also more favorable to such things, then perhaps the work of other scientists can go forward. And perhaps, now that you know about this example of Her Majesty’s, ah, flexibility, you can appreciate her a little better.”

Twilight nodded. “I do. Thank you.” She looked one last time around the little building. “You know, this wasn’t what I expected, but I think this did turn out to be an interesting tour after all!”

“I am glad to hear that,” Dr. Turing said, placing the Enigma back in the safe. “Though, ah, if you wouldn’t mind, could you please tell Gadget and Miss Turing that I took you to a b-bird sanctuary or some other boring nonsense?”

Twilight laughed. “I’ll try to come up with something that makes you sound less boring, Professor. I think Equestria owes you at least that much.”

***

Twilight and Dr. Turing entered the Centre of Mathematical Sciences building. In the main foyer, they immediately spotted Gadget and Turing Test. A small crowd of students were milling around, staring and chatting and asking questions. Gadget, blushing and sweating, gave a massive sigh of relief when she spotted Twilight walking toward them.

“Oh thank goodness you’re here, Twilight!” Gadget cried, rushing over to her. Leaning in, she whispered, “Can you and Dr. Turing get rid of all these students? They keep pestering us with questions and all this attention is super embarrassing!”

Twilight nodded and trotted up to the small crowd. “Hello, everypony!” she said cheerfully, getting them all to turn their heads. “Turing Test, I see you’ve got a little fan club!”

“In a manner of speaking, that is correct,” Turing replied. “These students have been making numerous inquiries regarding my abilities. For instance, three of them have asked me if being a robot is ‘fun.’”

“Well, what did you tell them?”

“I informed them that I lacked a basic point of comparison by which I could judge relative levels of fun, but that my experiences are occasionally fun.”

“Well, that’s good to hear,” Twilight said with a nod, noting that all the students in attendance were now fixated on watching the two of them talking.

“Many of them seem to be uncertain about making further inquiries. This stallion,” she said, pointing toward a young stallion with a bowl cut mane and wearing glasses, “has asked his fellow student if he should inquire if I am ‘anatomically correct.’”

The group of them all turned to stare at the young stallion, who turned bright red and did a very good impression of a turtle as he attempted to withdraw his head back through his shirt collar.

“Uh, I think that’s enough inquiries for now, Turing Test,” Twilight said, forcing a smile.

“Yes, quite so!” Dr. Turing said, giving all the students a hard glare.

The students grumbled a bit, some mumbling polite goodbyes as they dispersed.

“Oh, thank Celestia that’s over!” Gadget sighed. “Well, our tour was fun, right up until all those students started bugging us. How was your, um... ‘thing’?” she asked, making quotation marks with her mechanical fingers.

“It was really interesting. Dr. Turing took me to some old book depository in Trottingham. It was fascinating for me, but probably nothing you’d find interesting.”

Gadget nodded, but Turing Test tilted her head.

“Your heart rate and eye movement have altered slightly, Twilight Sparkle,” she said. “I apologize, but these signs indicate that you are not being truthful. Am I correct?”

Twilight and Dr. Turing both froze, glancing at each other.

“Ooh, busted!” Gadget said, a sly grin on her face. “Looks like you caught them, Turing Test!”

“Is there some reason for this fabrication?”

Twilight sighed. “Look, I’m sorry, but it’s just something Dr. Turing asked me to keep between us. Can you please not ask us anything further?”

Turing Test nodded. Gadget pouted slightly, but shrugged her shoulders. “If you say so, Twilight.”

Dr. Turing, however, still furrowed his brow and took a long look at Turing Test. “Ah, pardon me, but I wasn’t aware that you had the ability to detect lies.”

Turing Test shook her head. “I do not. However, certain physical signs may indicate stress that accompanies the telling of lies. However, it is not a perfect method. For instance, I was unable to discern Blue Blazer’s deception despite spending a significant amount of time with her. Some ponies may simply be more skilled at deception than others. Twilight Sparkle is not among their number.”

Twilight made a face while Gadget snickered. Dr. Turing seemed to relax.

“Well then,” he said, “I think we should get moving; we’re running a little behind schedule as it is. Miss Turing, Gadget, Princess, if you’ll follow me?”

The griffon led them down a hallway and to a set of stairs. They descended three floors into another sub-basement. Before two heavy metal doors were a pair of security guards and another pony, a unicorn who smiled when he saw them coming.

“Ah, there you are!” he said, walking over to greet them. “Allow me to introduce myself: my name is Choco Mint. But please, you can just call me Mint.”

Choco Mint was a rather tall and slender unicorn. He was pale green and had a wavy, almost poofy dark brown mane and tail and sparkling emerald eyes. He was wearing a dark brown necktie that matched his mane. On his flank was a cutie mark depicting a pair of thin, chocolate mint cookies, one of which had a bite taken out of it. Twilight noted that his green color really could be described as “mint green” and with his mane, it did look like frothy chocolate cream or mousse. He also wore a calm, confident smile.

“Why Talon,” he said, raising his eyebrows slightly, “you didn’t tell me our guests would be two such lovely ladies!”

Twilight couldn’t keep the slight blush from her cheeks and Gadget wore one to match as she started to giggle. She had to admit, he was a decidedly handsome pony. Before she knew it, he’d taken up her hoof and kissed it, then done the same for Gadget.

Dr. Turing narrowed his eyes and puffed out his cheeks indignantly, his feathers ruffling. “Mr. M-Mint, I will thank you to p-p-please try to remain professional!” he exclaimed.

Mint gave a little pout and put a hoof to his chest. “Oh, but of course! I’m sorry, Talon, I wasn’t thinking. I was just so--”

“Never mind!” the griffon snapped. Calming himself down and smoothing his feathers, Dr. Turing placed his claw on Mint’s shoulder. “This smooth-talking lad here is my assistant. He will be conducting the main test today after some baseline exams.”

Twilight blinked. “Wait, what baseline exams?”

“Just a few rudimentary measurements,” Mint said, waving a hoof, “before we get to the main event.” He then fixated his eyes on Turing Test and his smile faltered slightly.

Twilight turned and it was then that she noticed Turing Test’s eyes. They were shifting, focusing and refocusing as she stared back at Mint.

“Turing Test?” she asked.

“Yes, Twilight Sparkle?” she asked, not looking at her.

“Is something the matter?” she asked.

Turing looked from her, to Mint, and back to her again. “I do not believe so. Perhaps the machinery in this building is affecting my sensor readings.”

Twilight waited for her to say more, but when she didn’t, Dr. Turing cleared his throat, getting their attention.

“Ah, well, Mr. Mint, this is the famous Turing Test. Shall we begin?”

Mint nodded. “Yes, I believe so.” He stuck out his hoof and Turing placed her own upon it. “Charmed,” he said flatly, this time making no attempt at kissing it. In fact, Twilight thought his voice now had an edge to it.

Deciding not to comment on this, Twilight followed as they walked through the doors and into a much wider, more spacious room. She and Gadget both gasped when they saw what was before them.

Over a dozen ponies, many in lab coats, were spread out all over the room, but each and every one was engaged in working on the massive piles of electronics and wires nearby. All along the wall were towering metal machines. A jungle of wires led through them and many of them were adorned with knobs, dials, switches, and glass-covered meters. Twilight had owned numerous bits of scientific equipment herself back in the Golden Oak Library, but this was on another level entirely.

“Princess Twilight, Gadget, Miss Turing,” Dr. Turing said, gesturing to the sight before them, “welcome to our workshop. This is where we are putting together the Automatic Computing Engine - or ‘ACE’ as we’ve taken to calling it.”

“Wow!” Twilight exclaimed breathlessly.

“Oh my gosh!” Gadget squealed, her mechanical hands going to the side of her face. “It’s even more amazing than I’d imagined!”

“Whoa, what the heck are those?!” exclaimed a scientist, a purple unicorn mare, as she bounded over to Gadget. Her eyes were fixated on Gadget’s mechanical arms. “These are incredible! How did you build them?!”

Gadget balked and took a step back. “Th-these? Oh, they’re just, um, something I made to help me with my work…”

“But how do they operate?” The mare seized Gadget’s hoof eagerly. “I’d love to know!”

“I, um, well…”

“Oh-oh-oh-oh, wait, there it is!” The mare’s jaw dropped open and she assumed a look of pure, childlike joy when she saw Turing Test. “Hey, everypony, the automaton is here!”

The commotion was enough to attract the attention of all the other engineers nearby and soon they were all milling about. Most of them didn’t know what to look more awed about: Gadget’s arms, the Princess in their midst, or Turing Test.

“Look at these polymer coils! They’re warm! I wonder how they made them so conductive!”

“It’s a real honor to have you here, Your Highness!”

“Are the arms heavy? And how many kilos can you lift per arm?”

“Look at the way it moves its head. Automaton, can you look over here? Oh my gosh, it did!”

“Listen, I heard the way you handled Tirek. It must have been absolutely brilliant to watch!”

“What sort of maintenance do they require? Oil? Do the wires ever get crossed?”

There was a sharp clapping sound and they all turned to see that Dr. Turing had taken to the air and was clapping his claws together, getting their attention.

“Yes, yes, everypony, I know you are all v-very curious about our esteemed guests,” he said, managing to smile as he looked down at them. “I assure you we will try to get everyone’s questions answered, but we really m-mustn’t waste time; Princess Twilight Sparkle and Miss Turing Test do have their own matters back in Ponyville, and Miss Gadget is our guest on loan from Vanderbull Industries.

“Why don’t you all write down any questions you have on some note cards or, ah, some papers or something, and our guests can answer them when they get some time?” He landed back on the ground, folding up his wings again and smiled at Twilight and her friends. “Does that seem agreeable, my friends?”

Twilight nodded. “Of course. I’d be glad to answer any questions you have!”

“Likewise!” Gadget said.

“I will comply as well,” Turing Test replied. At the sound of her synthesized voice, the engineers all gave a start and began chatting excitedly.

“Did you hear that?”

“How did anypony do that?”

“Is that a set response? What else can she say?”

Dr. Turing clapped again, silencing them. “Everypony p-please, I must insist we conduct ourselves with a little m-more dignity! We are not children, after all! There will be plenty of time to see Miss Turing in action.”

Now cowed, the other engineers all bowed their heads and tried to regain their composure. The group began to break off, returning to work.

Dr. Turing winked slyly at Turing Test. “Seems you’re quite popular today, Miss Turing. I hope you don’t mind it.”

But Turing Test shook her head. “I do not. I am not accustomed to such eagerness from organic ponies, with few exceptions.” She glanced around the room at the engineers, many of whom were still looking back at her, beaming smiles on their faces. “It is… nice,” she added.

Dr. Turing nodded. “I see. Well, my friends, what you see before you is what will one day be the most powerful general purpose computer ever constructed.” He paused, raising an eyebrow at Turing Test. “Well, present company excluded. I daresay even when it is constructed, it won’t match many of your own mind’s capabilities, Miss Turing. But then, I doubt you will wish to spend all your time calculating the growth of animals and crops and long-term weather pattern planning.”

Turing Test twitched her ears. “You are correct. While I could prove capable of such things, I am content to follow my current directive of making friends.”

Twilight smiled and put her hoof around Turing’s shoulders. “Glad to hear it, Turing. Although,” she added, her grin broadening, “at least we know you’ve got options if you ever decide to get a part-time job and earn a few bits on the side.”

At that, Choco Mint, who’d been standing by in silence the whole time, started chuckling.

“Is something funny, Mr. Mint?” Twilight asked, trying to keep a smile on her face.

“Oh, it’s just that it seems a little funny to pay a machine. I mean, one of the reasons you build a machine to do a job is so you don’t have to pay a pony to do it! Why pay a machine for doing what it’s told?” he laughed.

Dr. Turing shot Mint a look and he stepped back, his laughter cutting off.

“Er, I apologize for that outburst. I’ll have a word with him about his manners,” Dr. Turing said quietly. “Now then, Twilight, Gadget, I am certain we could have one or two of the team show you about the place and explain what we’re trying to accomplish. As for you, Miss Turing, I’ve arranged for those preliminary baseline tests we discussed. We’ll be checking your skills at maths, spatial reasoning, abstraction, that sort of thing.”

Turing Test looked to Twilight.

“That sounds fine to me, Turing Test,” Twilight said, nodding to her. “We’ll catch back up with you later.”

“Acknowledged.” She turned to face Dr. Turing. “Will you be conducting the test, Dr. Turing?”

“Actually, the baseline tests will be conducted by Maregaret Hamiltrot, one of our top up-and-comers. Graceful Hopper will be showing Twilight and Gadget the ACE.” He paused, looking around. “Wait a moment, where is Miss Hopper? Mint, have you seen her?”

Mint jerked his head over at one of the large components of the ACE. “She’s getting some bugs out of the system.”

There was a clatter and a cry of “Ah-ha!” as a navy blue earth pony mare with her mane cut short emerged from behind the machinery. “Another moth!” she said, holding the dead bug up in her hoof. “Tell the boys in the back to get off their flanks and boot this thing up now that I’ve de-bugged the system!”

Gadget smiled and leaned over to Twilight. “I like her already.”

“Now, if you’ll excuse me,” Dr. Turing said, “Mint and I are going to make preparations for the main test. Mint?”

“Right away, Talon,” he said, and followed behind him as the group split up.

***

An hour later, the whole group was gathered back in the main room of the sub-basement. Standing before them all, Maregaret Hamiltrot, a tan pegasus mare with a long mane and glasses, read off the findings from the baseline tests.

“Upon giving the automaton--”

“Robot.”

Hamiltrot smiled. “Er, yes, the robot Turing Test the exams, she managed to complete all items in record time. In Mathematics, she completed every single item correctly in less than 30 seconds, most of which was taken up only by marking them in pencil on her exam sheet. Her Visual Recognition score was also excellent and she shows very good skills in Reading Comprehension and Vocabulary. In almost every area, her skills are perfect, or very nearly. Were she an ordinary pony, she’d most likely be classified as a genius.”

The others gathered nearby were furiously scribbling all this down on their clipboards. Twilight smiled at Turing Test, swelling with pride.

“Um, however, she did rather poorly on test items involving idioms. Even given context, she almost always chose the most literal interpretation, with some exceptions. What’s more, on the Abstract Reasoning section, she received a score of only 47%.”

Another murmur was heard, louder than before.

“That’s slightly below the average!” said one of them.

“Everypony please!” Hamiltrot said, tapping the results she had on her own clipboard. When the group fell quiet again, she continued. “She did very well with analyzing patterns and making predictions, but had difficulties making statements that characterized a situation or extracting a conclusion from an anecdote.”

“For example?” asked somepony else.

“Well, for instance, one of the items involved the story ‘The Timberwolf in Sheep’s Clothing,’ wherein a timberwolf dresses itself in the pelt of a sheep and tricks other sheep to follow it into the woods where it then preys upon them. The subject was asked what lesson could be learned from the story that would apply to real life.”

“I found the story to be an unreliable source of information,” Turing said, cutting in, “as my information on timberwolves does not indicate that they have the capacity for such deception, nor would it be likely that the wearing of wool would be enough to deceive a sheep, given the relative size, distinctive appearance, and scent of a timberwolf. Any information extracted from such a fictitious tale would be suspect, given the lack of accurate information.”

The engineers gathered were writing all this down and several of them chuckled to themselves, a few of them even rolling their eyes.

Turing Test noticed that Twilight’s cheeks had flushed and she was hiding her face behind one hoof. Turing’s metallic ears fell.

“My answer was in error?” she asked. “Twilight Sparkle, have I disappointed you?”

“No, no, not at all Turing!” Twilight said quickly. “It’s okay, we all make mistakes!”

“Y-yes, that’s right!” Hamiltrot said, smiling at Turing Test. “You still did far better than expected for a machine!”

Dr. Turing cleared his throat, stepping out from the group. “Regardless, it still sounds as though she, ah, more than meets the minimum qualifications to take the test, correct, Dr. Hamiltrot?”

Hamiltrot raised her head. “Indeed so, Dr. Turing. She’s ready.”

This caused the numerous engineers to chatter excitedly and some even began to stomp their hooves in applause. Twilight noticed that Choco Mint was wearing a calm, even smug expression. She found it irksome and frowned. Surprisingly, he matched that frown and then turned to look directly at her. The two locked eyes for a moment before Dr. Turing came and clapped Mint on the shoulder.

“Now then, enough dawdling!” he exclaimed. “Let us begin the test properly!”

Mint’s frown faded instantly and he smiled. “Yes sir! Turing Test, everypony, if you’ll come with me, it’s time we reviewed the rules of… the Imitation Game!”

***

Twilight found herself in a small observation area with glass windows overlooking a larger room with a single table and a stool. The room had one entrance and exit. The exit, she was told, would lead to a hallway which in turn split off into two rooms. Turing Test would sit in one, and a pony would sit in another. Twilight, Gadget, Dr. Turing, and a few other scientists were sitting in the small room while Choco Mint and Turing Test stood below.

“Can you hear me, everypony?” Mint hollered.

Dr. Turing pressed a button on a console and spoke into a microphone and his voice echoed out into the small room below: “We hear you loud and clear, Mr. Mint.”

“Then I’ll explain the rules for the so-called ‘Turing Test’ to Turing Test.” Mint cleared his throat.

“The rules are fairly simple. Miss Turing and another pony will each sit in a separate room down the hall. An Interviewer will sit at this table,” here he gestured to the table in the center of the room, “and pass questions to an Arbiter. The Arbiter will go to both Miss Turing and the other pony - identified as Subject A and Subject B - and then ask the questions, and collect their answers in written form. The Arbiter will then report the answers back to the Interviewer.

“The Interviewer may pose a maximum number of ten questions on any topic. They may ask each question to one or the other or both, should they choose. Thus, follow-up questions are allowed. The goal is to then determine, based on the answers of those ten questions, which one is the organic pony and which is the machine. The Interviewer will select either A or B. Should they genuinely feel uncertain, they are allowed to state so.

“Should the Interviewer guess that Miss Turing is the organic pony or vice versa in 50% or more cases, then we can say that she has passed the Turing Test by demonstrating responses at least as intelligent as an ordinary pony. Unsure answers likewise count in her favor, for if she is truly able to respond in such a manner as to leave significant doubt, then she has responded well enough. We will play 30 rounds of the game, with numerous ponies selected at random from the population and from the student body here at Cambridle. We’ll take a break after every ten ponies.

“Does everypony understand the terms of the game and are there any further questions?”

Twilight frowned. “Dr. Turing?” she whispered.

“Hm, yes?” he asked, turning to her. “Is something the matter?”

“Dr. Turing I… I hate to say it, but Turing Test is… well, you know how she is. I think this test might be too difficult for her.”

But Dr. Turing only smiled. “Let’s just see what she can do. You know what they say, after all, Princess Twilight… ‘it’s not whether you win or lose, it’s how you play the game.’”

Twilight furrowed her brow. “But in this case, it does matter--”

Dr. Turing held up a claw and gave her a wink. “Please trust me. I’m certain we’ll see some interesting results.” That said, he pressed the com button again. “There are no questions up here, Mr. Mint.”

Mint nodded and turned to Turing Test. “How about you? Do you have any questions?”

“Negative. My role is to answer questions, not to ask them.”

Twilight and Gadget laughed, overhearing that.

Choco Mint’s eye twitched. “It seems you’ve got a mouth on you.”

“I have no mouth to speak of.” After a beat, she added, “Or to speak with.”

This drew another round of laughter from above, this time from more than just Twilight and Gadget, though neither Mint nor Turing Test could hear them.

“Let’s begin the test. I’ll escort you to your room.” He led her into the hallway, shutting the door behind them. “Oh, and for each of these rounds, you will be told who your opponent is.”

“Is that a necessary component to answer the Interviewer’s questions?”

Choco Mint shook his head, chuckling. “I suppose that’s up to you.”

Turing Test’s ears shifted as they stopped at a door. “Acknowledged.”

“For what it’s worth, I wish you luck,” Mint said, opening the door for her. “You will need it.”

Turing was about to go in, but she paused, leaning in more closely at him. He squirmed under her scrutiny.

“What? What’s the matter?”

“I have a further inquiry, Choco Mint.”

He tightened his lips. “Yes, what is it?”

“You do not seem to be an engineer or doctor. Am I correct in that observation?”

Mint blinked. “Why… yes, that is correct.”

“Then why are you administering this test instead of one of the University staff?”

Mint stifled a laugh with his hoof. “Well, to tell the truth, I happen to be an expert on the Imitation Game. I met Dr. Turing and he was quite impressed with my skills. He entrusted me to make it as fair as possible. And I assure you that I will.” He made a small motion over his heart. “You have my word.”

Turing Test hesitated for a moment, then nodded, letting Mint shut the door. The test was about to begin.

***

Round 1

The Interviewer was an orange earth pony stallion with a green mane.

“Name and occupation?” Mint asked.

“Uh, name’s Orange Clockwork, mate. I’m a watch salespony.” The stallion shifted in his seat. “So, I just ask questions and decide which one is a machine and which one’s a pony? That sums it up?”

“That’s right, sir,” Mint said. “One is a machine and the other is a male Cambridle student. Beyond that, I’m not allowed to provide any other information. Now, if you’ll write down your first question, I’ll ask it to one or both of the Interviewees.”

Orange Clockwork chuckled. “Well, suppose it’s a bit of an obvious question, then, but I suppose I’ll just ask ‘Are you a machine?’”

Both Clockwork and Mint laughed.

“Can’t get any simpler than that now, can we, mate?” Clockwork asked.

Mint shrugged. “I suppose not. Here, I’ll go ask them. I’ll identify them as only Subject A or Subject B, you understand.”

Mint walked out of the room, closing the door behind him. A minute later, he returned with two notecards.

“Well, um, here are the answers,” Mint said. “Subject A’s response is: ‘No.’” He paused, taking a deep breath. “Subject B’s response is: ‘Yes, I am.’”

Orange Clockwork gawked at him. “You’re puttin’ me on.”

There was some sound coming from the small observation room overhead and he stared at the tinted windows. “Um… well, I mean, I know it’s only one question, but I’d guess B’s the machine.”

Mint smiled. “You are correct, sir.”

TURING TEST SCORE: 0/1

***

Round 2

Interviewer: High Castle; pegasus stallion; police officer.

Subject A: Turing Test
Subject B: Earth pony mare, age 41, homemaker

Question 1: “Do you have any family?”
A: “None that I know of.”
B: “Yes. I am married with two foals. One colt, one filly.”

Question 2: (for A only) “What do you mean by ‘that you know of?’”
A: “I do not know if I have more family members. However, it is possible.”

Question 3: (for A only) “Why do you think it’s possible?”
A: “Since my designation is 003, it is reasonable that there are others who were produced before me.”

Interviewer correctly identified A as a machine.

TURING TEST SCORE: 0/2

***

Round 6

Interviewer: Perky Pat; unicorn mare; caterer.

Subject A: Unicorn stallion; age 15; student
Subject B: Turing Test

Question 1: “Do you have a favorite food?”
A: “Oat burgers.”
B: “Apple Pie.”

Question 2: “What do you do for fun?”
A: “Spend time with mates.”
B: “I enjoy my time with friends.”

Question 3: “What do you do with your friends?”
A: “Whatever we feel like.”
B: “It depends on which friend I am with.”

Question 4: (for B only) “Can you give an example of an activity you enjoy with a particular friend?”
B: “When I am with my friend (name redacted), I enjoy telling jokes.”

Question 5: (for A only) “Why do you like your friends?”
A: “You know, they’re cool.”

Question 6: (for A only) “What do you mean ‘cool’?”
A: “You know, they’re just cool is all! What kind of question is that?”

Interviewer incorrectly identified A as a machine.

TURING TEST SCORE: 1/6

***

Round 8

Interviewer: Friendly Buster; earth pony stallion; bouncer at a pub.

Subject A: Turing Test
Subject B: Earth pony mare; age 20; Cambridle student of mathematics.

Question 1: “What is your favorite color?”
A: “I do not have one.”
B: “Blue, I guess. Red’s nice too, though.”

Question 2: “What sort of music do you like?”
A: “I have not listened to music very much.”
B: “Lots of different kinds.”

Question 3: “What is your hometown?”
A: “I reside in Ponyville.”
B: “I’m from Tall Tale, originally.”

Question 4: “Were you born there?”
A: “Negative.”
B: “Yes, and I lived there for most of my life before I went away for University.”

Question 5: (for A only) “Where were you born, then?”
A: “I was not born. However, I do not know where I was manufactured.”

Interviewer correctly identified A as a machine.

TURING TEST SCORE: 1/8

***

Round 10

Interviewer: Alphane Moon; pegasus mare; Cambridle student of geology

Subject A: Unicorn mare; age 30; sales clerk
Subject B: Turing Test

Question 1: “How do you style your mane?”
A: “I do it up in a cute braid.”
B: “I do not style it in any particular way.”

Question 2: “Do you usually wear any special clothes or accessories?”
A: “I wear a scarf for work, and earrings.”
B: “I do not wear clothes. However, I have experimented with fashion and I do have a pair of brooches.”

Question 3: (for B only) “What kind of brooches?”
B: “They are amethyst stones. They match my eyes.”

Question 4: (for B only) “Where do you wear the brooches?”
B: “On my legs.”

Question 5: “Are you married?”
A: “Not yet!”
B: “No.”

Question 6: “What sort of pony would you like to marry if you choose to get married?”
A: “Just someone nice, funny, responsible, and a nice flank wouldn’t hurt either!”
B: “I have not considered that question before. I am not able to answer.”

Question 7: (for B only) “Why not?”
B: “I do not have enough information or experience to answer such a question.”

Question 8: “Do you prefer hot days or cold days?”
A: “I guess I like hot days a little better.”
B: “I have no preference.”

Question 9: “If you could have any job, what would it be?”
A: “I actually like my job right now! But, I guess if I had to pick, being a movie star would be neat too!”
B: “Until today, I had not considered that subject.”

Question 10: “How long is the longest river in Equestria?”
A: “I think it’s the Mississipony. Either that or the Bronco Grande. I’m not really sure how long either one is, though.”
B: “According to data I have acquired, the Mississipony river is the longest river in Equestria at 3,734 kilometers.”

Interviewer correctly identified B as a machine.

TURING TEST SCORE: 1/10

***

“Thank you, everypony!” Mint hollered. “Let’s take a half-hour break and then resume testing!”

Back in the observation area, Twilight was sitting on the floor with her face in her hooves. “I was so sure Turing was going to pass that last time!” she moaned.

“Well, cheer up, Twilight,” Gadget said, trying her best to keep a smile. “She is getting a lot better! It’s taking longer for the interviewers to figure her out!”

“But still!” Twilight exclaimed. “Only one out of ten!” She heaved a sigh and got to her hooves.

“N-now, Twilight, there’s no reason to be so upset,” Dr. Turing said. “Gadget is correct that she is showing signs of improvement, after all.”

She shot him a hard look. “If she fails just six more times, then she officially fails the whole test, right?”

“Well, yes, but--”

“But nothing!” she snapped. Dr. Turing took a step back, flinching at the harshness of her voice. “This test isn’t fair!”

“Oh really?” said a familiar voice.

They all turned and saw Choco Mint standing among them. Twilight’s expression grew even more sour. “That’s right. It isn’t fair. To pass this test, Turing Test would have to lie, and act like she was a normal, organic pony! But she’s never, ever lied!”

Mint looked to her, offering a kind smile. “You are correct. But allow me to explain why this test is valid. If I may, Talon?”

Dr. Turing nodded.

“Thank you. Now, the so-called Turing Test is being conducted according to what Dr. Turing laid out, but I have been entrusted to come up with a more balanced and fair version of the test. We’ve taken multiple steps to make the test more lenient: we’ve limited the number of questions to ten, we’ve allowed interviewers to state their uncertainty and counting that as success for the machine, and, after the first round’s fiasco, we’ve even limited questions to less ‘direct’ inquiries at your personal request.”

“Maybe so,” Twilight admitted, though she gave a roll of her eyes, “but I don’t see why this ‘Imitation Game’ is how you’re measuring Turing Test’s intelligence. It’s unreasonable to ask her to answer just like a pony!”

“Oh, I disagree,” Mint said, waving his hoof. “Miss Turing’s results on the baseline tests indicate that she has some skills, but the truth is that we could get many of the same results, at least in many of the same subject answers, from the computers we’ve already built and will continue to build, but nopony is making the argument that those machines are truly intelligent. Or sentient. How do we really know if Miss Turing is not just a scaled-up version of that? What seems to be intelligence could merely be a sophisticated bunch of algorithms and subroutines.

“And let’s be honest, Princess,” Mint added with a smirk, “if Miss Turing were passing this test, I doubt you’d still be complaining that this test is unfair.”

Twilight opened her mouth at that, but shut it, realizing that he was probably correct.

“The sad truth is that we really don’t quite have a firm grasp on what intelligence is, but I believe we can all recognize it in our fellow sentient beings: ponies, griffons, donkeys, and all manner of creatures. If a machine can respond in a way that is indistinguishable from such a sentient being, then we can reasonably assume that is also intelligent. To win this game, obviously a pony would have to lie to complete the objective. But Miss Turing isn’t doing it. She’s obstinate and literal and far too single-minded, so it ought to be perfectly obvious by now that she’s nothing more than--”

“Mint!” Dr. Turing snapped. “That is q-quite enough!”

Mint froze, looking around to see that Twilight was gritting her teeth at him, Gadget likewise was wrinkling her nose at him (and her front left mechanical hand was making quite the rude gesture), and Dr. Turing and the other engineers were giving him frosty looks as well.

He used his magic to adjust his collar and loosen his tie. “Ah. Sorry, I just got a little carried away.”

“Mint, I have a lot of faith in you to administer this test,” Dr. Turing said, “but if I think you are letting your bias get in the way of things, I will remove you from it and find somepony else to do it. Is that clear?”

Mint lowered his gaze. “Yes, Tal-- sir.”

Twilight took a calming breath. “Listen, I understand what you’re saying, but I really think I ought to talk to Turing Test.”

Mint stiffened. “You can’t! You’ll contaminate the test if you just tell her how to pass!”

“Hear me out,” she said, cutting him off. “It’s true that one sign of intelligence is learning to adapt to new situations, but so is learning from advice and taking a little direction. Just let me help her come up with a better strategy for answering your questions. There’s no way I can feed her every possible answer to cheat on your test, is there?”

Mint ran his tongue around his cheek. “I… I suppose not.”

Dr. Turing nodded. “I agree. However, once testing resumes, no more assistance should be given. If we set the bar too low, I daresay the results of this test will start to lose any significance whatsoever.”

Twilight smiled. “Thank you. All right, Gadget, let’s go find Turing Test!”

Mint raised a hoof. “When I told her we were taking a break, she said she was going outside. You should be able to find her out there.”

“In that case,” Twilight said with a smirk, stepping over to Gadget, “let’s take a shortcut!”

“Huh? What kind of--”

There was a flash of light and the two were back outside the Centre of Mathematical Sciences.

“--shortcohhwhatthebuckwasthat?!” Gadget took a step back, blinking in the bright light outdoors.

“Sorry,” Twilight said sheepishly. “I teleported us. I thought it would be faster. I’ll warn you next time. Now where is Turing Test?”

It was then that the both of them heard a loud roar and whipped their heads around in the direction of the sound. They both gaped as they saw a shining, metallic object that was rising into the sky and speeding away.

It was Turing Test. She had gone into her P-Mode and was flying away at an incredible rate.

“Turing Test!” Twilight screamed. “Come back!”

But the robot did not turn back. Instead, she disappeared over the treetops surrounding the campus as students milling around cried out, pointing up in the sky as she passed.

Twilight sank to her haunches. “Where could she be going, Gadget? What in Equestria is she thinking?!”

***

What Turing Test was thinking as she rocketed out over Trottingham was this: I am failing.

I assured Twilight Sparkle that I would pass this test and prove my intelligence. I am failing to do so and when I am declared a failure, she will be very disappointed in my performance.

She will be disappointed in me.

She spotted a park below and slowed her velocity. As her jets powered down, she landed gently on a grassy hill and returned to her neutral mode. She lowered her ears, sitting on the soft earth.

For as long as she could remember, she’d known that others regarded her as no more than a machine. To others, she was nothing more than a mindless, mechanical thing that walked and talked. As she’d grown and developed, she’d convinced herself that this was not so and that Twilight Sparkle was right to have faith in her.

But now, when it was finally time to prove herself, she was failing. Badly.

I am a failure. I do not wish to see Twilight Sparkle’s disappointment. I am… She raised her head. This new feeling welling up inside her was something different. It was awful. It was reminiscent of guilt, but also of sadness. What could it be? She scanned her data and came to a conclusion.

Shame. I am… ashamed.

It was then that she heard a loud clamoring coming from the other side of the hill. She got to her hooves and peered around a tree. There was a crowd of ponies cheering and applauding. She couldn’t see what they were cheering for.

Knowing she often attracted unwanted attention, she moved very slowly down the hill coming up behind the crowd. They were standing before stage of some kind. On the stage were flashing lights and puffs of smoke. And emerging from behind it all, she heard loud, bombastic laughter.

“That is today’s show, Fillies and Gentlecolts!” said a blue pony as she come into view through the smoke. “You have borne witness to the greatest feats of prestidigitation in all of Equestria! So please leave a few bits as tribute and be sure to tell your friends what you saw! Tell them of the day you saw the one… the only…”

Turing Test saw the pony stand on two hind legs, lifting her conical hat as more streaks of light and blasts of smoke emerged from it, punctuating her final words.

“...the Great and Powerful Trixie!”

To be continued...

Author's Notes:

The Hat Man hopes you have enjoyed this chapter and will see you all next time! In the meantime, he has prepared a series of references that he hopes you will enjoy!

-Historically, a lot of Dr. Turing's story of the Enigma machine is based on Alan Turing's experiences in real life with England breaking Nazi codes, and done in much the same fashion.

-Dr. Turing's old workplace is called "Brindley Park," a play on the real life Bletchley Park and the term "brindle horse," which is a type streaked or striped coloration on a horse or pony.

-Some of Dr. Turing's colleagues are also real-life references:

+Graceful Hopper is named after Grace Hopper, a programmer who did a lot of work in computer sciences and really did coin the term "debugging," and yes, that bit about the moth wasn't a joke... that really was where the term "computer bug" comes from!

+Maregaret Hamiltrot is named for Margaret Hamilton, one of the programmers who helped get human beings to the moon during the Apollo 11 mission. Neither she nor Hopper worked with Turing, as far as I know, but I included them at the request of longtime reader JFalk, who clued me in about them. Thanks, pal!

-The first interviewer for the Imitation Game is named Orange Clockwork, referencing the book and movie A Clockwork Orange.

-The other interviewers are named for the incredibly influential science-fiction writer Philip K. Dick's books and characters. High Castle = the book The Man in the High Castle; Perky Pat = a woman in a simulation in The Stigmata of Palmer Eldritch; Friendly Buster = Buster Friendly, the TV personality in Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?; and Alphane Moon = the book Clans of the Alphane Moon.

I hope you enjoyed it, folks! Next time, it's the continuation of the Trottingham Arc! It'll be great!
...and powerful.

Technologic, Part 3

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“Encore!” The singular cry came up from the crowd and was soon joined by others.

“Encore! Encore!”

Trixie gave a little pout. “Oh, but the Great and Powerful Trixie is tired! After so many feats of magic, would you really ask her for more?”

The crowd laughed, seeing the little smile that tugged at the corners of her mouth.

“Encore!” they cried again.

“Oh, very well,” Trixie said, polishing a hoof on her chest. “In that case… behold as Trixie performs one last illusion that will astound you and leave you breathless! But be forewarned… this is not for the faint of heart!”

Turing Test was still standing at the back of the crowd. Somehow nopony had noticed her; all the spectators were purely focused on the performance before them. Not having seen the first part of the act, Turing Test did not know what to expect, so she quietly watched to see what would happen next.

“Behold!” Trixie shouted, and a burst of smoke and light covered the stage again. When it cleared, a bed of tall, pointed metal spikes was in the center of the stage. And at the center of the spikes was the tallest of them, taller than Trixie herself.

“You have all seen such illusions as lying on a bed of nails and other such objects, no doubt!” Trixie said, giving a roll of her eyes and a demure laugh. “But that is the weak fare offered by inferior illusionists! The Great and Powerful Trixie offers you more than such childish parlor tricks! Do you doubt that this bed of spikes is real? That it is some convincing prop?”

There were murmurs from the crowd and many even began to laugh, nodding their heads.

“Then see for yourselves!” Trixie’s horn glowed and she levitated out a small, round honeydew melon. She held it over the center spike, raising it at least a meter over the point. Then her horn suddenly ceased to glow and the melon dropped onto the spike.

It was pierced, impaled instantly, and slid down the shaft of the spike, the greenish juice dripping over it and the seeds sticking to the point of the spear. The crowd gasped.

Turing scanned what she had just seen. The melon was real. The composition of the spike was metal. What she had just seen was real.

“Convinced are you?” Trixie asked, raising an eyebrow as she wiped off the spike with a small cloth. “Then watch carefully. What you are about to see is proof of Trixie’s true power! She will balance herself on this spike using only her superb physical constitution, imbued with the great mystic energies from the finest mages across Equestria and beyond! That’s right… Trixie will do this without the use of her magic!”

The crowd’s murmurs of excitement grew in intensity. Some even began to grow worried and a few backed away, expressing that they couldn’t stand the sight of blood. Turing Test saw a mare try to lead her foals away, but they were insistent that she let them watch.

“Behold!” Trixie’s face grew hard and serious and, gritting her teeth and furrowing her brow, she gently stepped onto the lowest of spikes on the bed. The crowd winced as she placed her hoof directly on the spike. She took a few more steps, each hoof standing on the spikes as she ascended them. Then, at last, she gently slid onto the center spike, balancing herself on her belly, spreading her legs out in four directions like she was a throw rug, or mimicking flight.

“This… is… a feat that requires the utmost... concentration!” Trixie managed to say this, though her face was creased and she appeared to be clenching her teeth even tighter, as if straining or perhaps in pain. “Just… one… mistake and--”

There was a sudden movement and suddenly Trixie’s whole body dropped, her body jerking downward and the center spike pierced through her back, stabbing right through her cape.

The crowd screamed in fear and shock as Trixie seemed to give one last gasp, her eyes rolling back in her head, and her body went limp, impaled on the spike.

Turing was about to launch herself forward and attempt to rescue the magician, seeing that this act had gone wrong. But then her sensors detected that, curiously, Trixie’s vital signs, body temperature, and everything else about her appeared to be normal.

Somehow, Trixie was alive.

This was proven correct as Trixie suddenly raised her head, giving a smile to the crowd.

Many gasped. Others laughed, a few even began to applaud.

“Oh dear!” Trixie said dramatically. “How embarrassing! It seems I’ve gotten myself into a tricky situation. Well, no matter… it will take far more than this to best the Great and Powerful Trixie!”

Trixie bent backwards, taking the tip of the spike in her front hooves. With her back legs, she rested her hooves on the other spikes to brace herself. Grunting and straining, she appeared to push herself back up the spike, the point of it vanishing back through her cape until she had pushed herself off it. She stood on her hind legs, seemingly extricating herself from the center spike and hopped off the bed of spikes and back onto the stage. She raised her forelegs high in the air.

The crowd erupted into wild cheers and applause.

“Thank you, thank you! You have been a wonderful audience, and I have been your wonderfully talented wizard! Catch my next show this evening at seven o’clock! Bring your friends and be astonished once again!”

The ponies began to file forward and many tossed bits on stage. The crowd began to disperse, but it was then that many froze when they saw Turing Test.

“Blimey! What’s that?!”

“Is this part of the act?”

“Is that a pony? Is it alive?”

Turing Test began to back away. But then a voice called out over the crowd: “What is the meaning of this?!” Trixie pushed through them and trotted right up to her. “Who dares frighten the Great and Powerful Trixie’s audi--”

She froze, her eyes going wide when she saw Turing.

“--ence?” She blinked at her. Indeed, the whole crowd seemed to be focused on the two of them.

“My apologies,” Turing said, bowing her head slightly. “I only wished to witness your performance. My name is Turing Test.”

Trixie said nothing, but continued to blink at her.

“I did not intend to disturb or frighten anypony; I found your performance very interesting. However, I will leave now. I should rejoin my friends.” She began to back away.

“Friends?” Trixie asked, keeping up with her, even as Turing continued to retreat. “What friends?”

“I am engaged in a series of tests at Cambridle University accompanied by my friends Gadget and Twilight Sparkle.”

Trixie froze and held up her hoof at that. “Actually,” she said, a smile forming on her face, “why don’t you stay and join Trixie backstage for a while? This day just became much more interesting!”

***

Twilight and Gadget rushed back into the sub-basement lab. Twilight skidded to a halt when she saw several of the other scientists still standing around.

“Gadget,” she said, getting the younger mare’s attention, “I’m going to tell Dr. Turing that Turing Test is missing and we’ll start looking for her. I want you to notify the other scientists and stay here in case she comes back!”

Gadget nodded, even giving a little salute with one of her hands. “No problem, Twilight!”

Twilight dashed off back to the testing area until she found Dr. Turing and Choco Mint.

“Dr. Turing!” she cried. “Turing Test is missing!”

Both Dr. Turing and Mint turned to stare at her.

“I beg your pardon?” the griffon asked. “Where did she go?”

“She just took off! Gadget and I saw her flying to the north! She just… she just flew off without saying anything!” She heaved a sigh, lowering her head as she tried to catch her breath. “I… I don’t know where she is now.”

Mint raised an eyebrow. “Why in the world would she run away like that?”

Twilight shook her head. “I don’t know. Maybe… maybe she’s upset because she’s not doing as well as she’d expected.”

Mint rolled his eyes, a gesture that Twilight caught.

“Is that really so hard to believe?!” Twilight snapped, glaring hard at the pale green pony.

Mint scoffed. “It is, actually. Perhaps she just wandered off for some frivolous reason that she thought might fulfill some directive. Or perhaps she’s going to collect data in the hope of improving her score.”

“All right, all right!” Dr. Turing groaned loudly as he interjected himself between the two of them before their argument worsened. “Listen, I am sorry that you b-both aren’t getting along, but we cannot w-waste time when Miss Turing is unaccounted for.”

Twilight and Mint both calmed down and nodded to each other.

“Good. Now then, I’ll n-notify campus security to start searching the area for her. Furthermore, there isn’t much to the north of this campus save for some neighborhoods, a park, and a shopping district, so there aren’t many places she could have gone. Twilight, would you like to notify the police or would you prefer if you and I and a few volunteers began an aerial search for her?”

Twilight opened her mouth, but then shut it again, rubbing her chin as she thought it over. “Let’s… let’s see if we can find her quickly. If not, then we can call the police. I don’t want there to be a panic and, in all honesty, it’s not like she’s in any danger… you’d have to be pretty tough to be a threat to Turing Test.”

Dr. Turing nodded, giving a little smile. “Very well then. Mint, please notify the other observers and try to stall the other volunteers when they get here.”

They were about to go, but Mint suddenly said, “Wait!”

They both turned and saw him biting his lip. “Um… Talon, a few of them have already started to arrive. The rest will surely be here in less than an hour. If we push our schedule back too far, many of our volunteers will have to leave. And if that happens, I fear we won’t be able to conduct the rest of the test!”

Dr Turing paused at that.

“Dr. Turing,” Twilight said, putting her hoof on his shoulder, “please, I need your help! We can’t worry about that right now!”

Dr. Turing nodded. “Yes, quite right. Mint, just do your best. If we haven’t f-found her within the hour then… well, we will deal with that problem when it comes.”

Mint sighed, but gave him a smile and a nod. “Understood,” he replied, and watched the two of them go.

***

Turing Test followed Trixie backstage only to find that “backstage” meant her wagon, which apparently could transform into a stage and back again. Watching it fold back into itself, Turing felt an odd moment of recognition, as she was herself capable of transforming in a similar way. Regardless, she walked into the wagon as Trixie shut the door behind her and put a tea kettle on a small burner.

“Trixie welcomes you to her home,” Trixie said, pulling out a few stools and undoing a hook on the wall, which caused a small table to unfold. She set out two cups. “Would you like some tea?”

Turing shook her head. “I am not capable of drinking tea or any other liquid. However, your offer is appreciated.”

Trixie nodded and put away one of the cups. “Well then, Turing Test,” she said, taking a seat, “it seems that you caught Trixie’s show. Were you impressed?”

Turing nodded. “I only observed your encore. My visual sensors are capable of analyzing magical energy and even replicating it. However, while I detected your use of magic to create many of the light effects and to trigger your smoke bombs, I did not detect any magic when you were impaled. Your vital signs remained normal throughout the event. However, I must ask that you be more careful, or else you may suffer a similar accident.”

Trixie blinked, then began to snicker, covering her mouth with her hoof, then finally burst out laughing. “Did you say ‘accident?’” She pounded the small table with her hoof, still laughing as Turing tilted her head, watching her the entire time. “That was no accident! That was part of Trixie’s act!”

Turing Test sat up straight. “Then you intended to injure yourself? Why would you place yourself in such danger?”

Trixie’s laughter intensified. “N-no - hahaha - you don’t understand!” she managed to gasp. “Trixie was in no danger! It was all a masterful illusion as part of Trixie’s show!”

Turing was silent. “Illusion? Then you were not injured? The spike did not truly penetrate your body?”

Trixie’s laughter was dying down. She waved a hoof as she caught her breath. “No, no, of course not. Trixie is a travelling magician… in addition her use of stage magic, she employs many unique techniques and devices to fool the audience.”

Turing got to her hooves. “Then you are a fraud and deceiving ponies and then asking them to give you their money. That action is wrong and I will notify the authorities of your deception.”

As Turing Test went for the door, Trixie scrambled over her furniture in the small wagon, vaulting over Turing and placing herself between the robot and the door. “Wait!” she cried. “You don’t understand! The ponies in the audience know it’s an illusion!”

Turing paused. She considered what Trixie was saying and she realized that the audience had behaved irrationally by not attempting to save Trixie when she appeared to be injured. Indeed, they had laughed when Trixie had raised her head and started speaking to them while still impaled, and had even applauded. Such actions would be strange, she supposed, in the case of a real injury, but if they had known, as Trixie said they had, then their actions suddenly made sense.

“Understood,” Turing Test said, backing away from the door. “However, I do not understand why you have made a performance of deceiving others, nor do I understand why other ponies watch such a performance when they know it to be fraudulent.”

Trixie sighed with relief when she saw that Turing wasn’t going to storm off. The tea kettle began to whistle and she levitated it over to the table, pouring her tea. She held out a hoof, gesturing to Turing Test to take a seat. The robot complied and sat across from her as she took a sip.

“Magic shows,” Trixie began, “aren’t mere fraud or chicanery. It is a serious art that involves quick movement, a strong body, and constant awareness of one’s audience. Trixie knows just how to astound, to amaze, and even to terrify!”

“So your audience knows that what they are seeing is an illusion, yet they are impressed. I cannot understand their reaction or why you used such potentially shocking tricks to elicit such a reaction.”

“‘Tricks?’ Silly robot, tricks are for kids! What Trixie does are ‘feats’ or ‘illusions!’ And she does what she does because ponies love a good thrill, even when they know that what their eyes are telling them cannot possibly be real.”

Turing tilted her head to the left and the right. “I do not understand why.”

“It seems you’ve never gone to a magic show,” Trixie sighed, raising an eyebrow. “Normally the only ponies who haven’t that Trixie knows of are small foals. Just how old are you?”

“My memory goes back to my activation approximately six weeks ago.”

Trixie nearly coughed on her tea. “Six weeks?!”

“Correct. I am not certain when I was built or by whom. However, since my activation, I have been in the care of Twilight Sparkle.” She noticed the slight change in Trixie’s expression. “It seems that you know her as well. May I inquire about the nature of your relationship?”

Trixie rolled her eyes. “It seems Twilight Sparkle never mentioned me.” She scowled, looking down at the cup of tea. “She did some things that annoyed me and I… might have overreacted.” She sighed. “Let’s just say that we haven’t really gotten along in the past and leave it at that.”

Turing’s ears twitched. “I have observed that it is part of your normal speech pattern to refer to yourself in the grammatical 3rd person. However, you just now ceased to do so.”

Trixie stared back at her, puffing out her cheeks, then waved her hoof. “Never mind that! As much as Trixie loves to hear about herself, that is not why she brought you to her home.” She leaned forward then, steepling her hooves. “Let’s talk more about you. Trixie has never seen a pony like you before!”

“That is expected. There do not seem to be any other robots like me in Equestria.”

“One of a kind, are you? Just like Trixie! In that case, tell her what you are doing here in Trottingham?”

Turing Test proceeded to tell her about her directive to make friends, about Gadget, about Dr. Turing, and her attempt to succeed at his test.

“The Imitation Game, eh?” Trixie asked, downing the last of her tea. “An odd test, if you ask Trixie, but not a difficult one.”

Turing sat straight up. “You have also been tested in this manner?”

Trixie rolled her eyes. “It’s not a test. At least not normally. It’s a party game. Trixie played it a lot in her younger days in Canterlot. The whole idea is to trick somepony into mistaking you for somepony else. So, what, your job is to try to convince somepony that you’re not a robot or that the other pony is? What is so difficult about that?”

“I am not certain. However, I have failed in nine out of ten attempts.”

Trixie blinked. “That’s pretty terrible.”

Turing Test lowered her head.

“Well, it seems that Miss ‘Princess of Friendship’ didn’t teach you everything you need to know.” She paused, pursing her lips. “Hmm…” She started to chuckle, finally clapping her hooves together. “Ah ha! In that case, the Great and Powerful Trixie will help you where she could not!”

Turing Test got to her hooves. “You believe you can assist me to be more successful?”

Trixie stood as well, placing her hoof on her chest. “Trixie gives her word that she can and will!”

Turing Test tapped her chin. “Very well,” she said after a moment’s thought. “How will we proceed?”

“Let’s start with a little practice,” Trixie said, clearing her throat. “Now, your goal is to convince the interviewer that you are a normal pony, correct?”

“Affirmative.”

A flash of annoyance crossed Trixie’s face. “Well first, don’t say ‘affirmative.’ Just say ‘yes’ or ‘no,” all right?”

Turing nodded. “Acknowledged.”

Trixie shook her head. “No no no, not ‘acknowledged.’ Just say ‘Okay,’ okay?”

“Okay.”

“Okay--”

“Okay.”

“Enough with the okays!” Trixie snapped.

“Okay.”

“I said-- never mind, let’s move on. All right, if the interviewer asks you what color the fur of your coat is, what do you say?”

“I do not have a fur coat. However, my exterior hull is--”

Turing was cut off as Trixie rolled up a newspaper and smacked her over the head with it. “No, no, wrong! You say ‘purple’ or ‘blue’ or ‘brown’ or whatever you think your opponent’s coat might be.”

“Why?”

“What do you mean ‘Why?’!” Trixie shouted. “Because normal ponies have fur!”

“But I do not.”

“But you don’t want the interviewer to know that! So tell them something a normal pony would say!” Trixie smacked her forehead. “Now Trixie sees why you’re failing this test. How do you not understand that answering like that will get you caught?”

Turing Test lowered her head. “I am sorry. But I do not know how else I should answer a question that is asked of me. The questions are too perceptive.”

Trixie softened her voice and offered a weak smile. “Now now,” she said, lifting Turing’s chin up, “there is still hope. Just tell Trixie one thing: why could you not say your coat was a normal color?”

“Because such a response would be false.”

Trixie nodded. “Yes, it would be.”

“However, I have never lied.”

And now Trixie’s eyes went wide. “Never?” she gasped. “You mean to tell me that you have never ever lied about anything?”

“Correct. I am capable of withholding information and giving indirect answers, and I believe that many such answers allowed me to avoid being discovered during the Imitation Game. However, some questions cannot be circumvented in the same way.”

Trixie chuckled. “No matter then,” she said, and levitated a bowl of fruit over to the table nearby them. From it, she removed a banana and placed it in her hoof. “Now then, Turing Test… what is this that Trixie has in her hoof?”

“A banana,” Turing replied immediately.

“No, sorry,” Trixie said, a smile spreading across her face. “This is an orange.”

Turing stared at the banana intently. “My scans indicate that it is not.”

“I’m sure they do.”

“It does not match any description of an orange. I have determined with 100% certainty that it is a banana.”

“Maybe so,” Trixie said, holding it closer to Turing’s face. “But if you want to pass your test, then you’ll need to start by telling me that it isn’t. Now then, look at this banana again.”

Turing glanced at it, then back to Trixie.

“Tell me that it’s an orange,” she said, narrowing her eyes with a smirk. “Lie to me.”

Turing Test was silent. She lowered her ears and slumped to the floor, her heavy body causing the floorboards to creak.

“I cannot.”

***

Gadget paced back and forth as she waited in the sub-basement lab. She was happy to do her part and wait for Turing Test to show up as Twilight had asked her, but just the same she felt anxious and she grumbled impatiently as she waited for either of her friends to return.

“Hey, um, Gadget is it?”

She lifted her head and saw Graceful Hopper and Maregaret Hamiltrot waving to her. The two mares were standing by some of the machinery for the ACE.

“Come on over here!” Hopper said. “I’m sure your friends will be back soon, so come relax with us. And in the meantime, Maregaret and I wanted to pick your brain about some things.”

Gadget managed a smile and trotted over to them. “Sure. I guess just pacing around making myself nervous isn’t helping at all.”

“Good point,” Hamiltrot said, giving a short nod. “Besides, we wanted to ask you a bit about Miss Turing Test anyway.”

Gadget raised an eyebrow. “What about?”

“Well, you helped fix her after Princess Twilight found her, right?” Hopper asked, leaning forward, a big smile on her face. “You saw what she looks like and how she runs, didn’t you?”

She nodded. “Yes. Mr. Vanderbull came to help after Princess Celestia notified him and he brought me with him.”

“How wonderful!” Hamiltrot said, clapping her hooves together. “So, maybe you can help us with a little debate a bunch of us have been having around here.”

“Um, sure,” Gadget said, giving a little shrug. She smiled, happy to be asked about something more up her alley. Talking about machines was always something she enjoyed.

“So, we understand she can do magic and she can fly and she can boost her strength like an earth pony,” Hamiltrot said, casually making little circles in the air with her hoof as she rattled off those traits, “but the big thing we were wondering about is if you know how her brain works.”

Gadget blinked. “Um, excuse me?”

Hopper shot Hamiltrot a glare. “Be a little more descriptive, Maregaret.” She turned to Gadget. “What she means, Gadget, is that we’re curious how her central processing machinery works. Did you get a chance to look inside?”

“Oh, I see,” she replied, and then shook her head. “Unfortunately, I didn’t. Mr. Vanderbull and I took Turing Test apart and put her back together, trying to replace all the parts that were damaged when she was struck by lightning, but her, um, well we called it her ‘brain case,’” she added with a little chuckle, “was something we couldn’t examine.”

“Why not?” Hopper asked.

“Well, we could see that everything - um, all the other systems, I mean - were connected to this one spherical device, but it was surrounded by a black metal casing. Very strong, probably magically-enhanced titanium alloy. It has an access panel, too, but the problem is that it has some sort of lock on it that required a key. Not only that, we detected that the lock had some magic attached to it, so it wasn’t the kind of lock we could just pick. Well, I mean, we considered trying to pick it anyway, but there was the possibility that breaking into it might have damaged the machinery. Plus, who knows, tampering with it might have caused some sort of self-destruct sequence to start. I doubt the ponies who built Turing Test want anypony else to know how they did it.”

Both mares frowned, lowering their ears at that. “That’s too bad,” Hamiltrot said. “I guess you can’t help us settle the debate.”

Gadget tilted her head at that. “I’m sorry, but what is the debate anyway?”

“Ah, well,” Hopper said, perking up suddenly, “a lot of us, Maregaret and I especially, are wondering if her mind is magitech-based or puretech-based. You’re good with magitech, right, Gadget? I mean, with your arms and all, right?”

Gadget held out one of her mechanical arms, looking at it thoughtfully as she pursed her lips. “Well, I, um… I don’t know if I’m an expert, but I did have to learn a lot about the principles in order to build these. But I’m self-taught and I kinda did a crash course on it to figure out just the stuff I needed to know. The truth is, I’m not sure if I’ll be able to build more prosthetics like them or not, though I’d really like to!”

Hopper and Hamiltrot both smiled at that.

“Um, as for magitech or puretech,” Gadget said, rubbing her chin with one mechanical hand, “I’m not really sure.” She smiled. “Which do you two think it is?”

Hopper stepped forward, cutting off Hamiltrot as she flashed a wide grin. “Well, I think she’s puretech. The ponies who built her were obviously hardcore scientists and engineers, so maybe they’ve received information about lost technology or been perfecting their computing power while the rest of Equestria lags behind.”

“Oh please,” Hamiltrot said, rolling her eyes. “Unlike Grace here, I think she must be utilizing some sort of magical enchantment. Lots of our most advanced machines have magical components, after all. Plus, she’s got computing power that will put the ACE and our best computers to shame even after we’ve built them! How in Equestria could they get that much computing power into a space that small? And keep it mobile! Why, we think future computers will be the size of whole buildings and even then I doubt they’ll be able to do all that she can!”

Hopper waved a hoof. “You’re forgetting that the best magical enhancement technology we have can only do a limited number of things. To animate something like that would require way more magic than even the best unicorn wizards in Equestria could ever manage. ‘Come-to-life’ spells are notoriously unpredictable and they usually just get things to move around or dance or something. How would they keep such an enchantment going, hm?”

They both looked to Gadget, their eyes aflame as they awaited her answer. The younger mare shrank into her jacket under their gaze, pulling it up around her neck.

“Oh,” Hopper said, her voice softer as she stepped forward, “we’re sorry, young lady.”

“Yes, we didn’t mean to put you on the spot,” Hamiltrot added, giving her a smile.

Gadget returned the smile, lifting her head slightly. “Well, I mean, if I had to guess, I’d say she’s got to be running on at least a little magitech. There’s just no way, even isolated as they are, that this group that built Turing Test could possibly have developed purely mechanical technology to run her like that.”

Hopper rolled her eyes as Hamiltrot assumed a smug smile. “See, Grace? She knows what she’s talking about!”

“Hmph!” Hopper said, though she had just a hint of a smile on her face, so Gadget realized she wasn’t really that upset. “Well, who knows… maybe it’s even simpler than all that.” She took on a sly, almost sinister grin. “Maybe she’s some modern day Frankenstallion’s monster and she’s got a real brain in there!”

“Ew!” Gadget said, wrinkling her nose at such a prospect.

Hamiltrot and Hopper laughed.

“Oh Grace, don’t be silly!” Hamiltrot said, playfully punching Hopper’s shoulder. “They couldn’t preserve a real organic brain inside that mechanical body. A real brain would need oxygen and water and nutrition. Unless you’ve seen Turing Test eating a lot of sugar, Gadget?”

Gadget shook her head. “No. Turing Test doesn’t eat.”

“Well, there you go!” Hamiltrot laughed. Then she grew more serious and tapped her own chin as she narrowed her eyes. “Still… her way of thinking is different from regular ponies at a superficial level, but in many other ways she seems a lot like us. Perhaps her mechanical brain has a similar structure.”

“I’d tend to think so,” Hopper said, nodding at that. “Whether it’s magitech or puretech, I’ll bet she’s more like us than some of our colleagues would care to admit.”

At that, Gadget leaned in more closely, glancing around nervously to make sure nopony else was within earshot. “Um, speaking of that,” she whispered, “what’s the deal with Choco Mint?”

“Hm? What about him?” Hopper asked. Then she chuckled. “Oh, wait, did he flirt with you?”

Gadget’s face flushed and both mares started to laugh.

“Oh, he did!” Hamiltrot managed to say. “That old rascal!”

“Th-that’s not what I was asking about!” Gadget shouted. She then immediately covered her mouth as other engineers all glanced over to her, wondering what the commotion was about.

“Don’t let it bother you,” Hopper said. “That’s how he is. He doesn’t mean anything by it.”

“But what I meant,” Gadget hissed, still blushing, “is that I think he’s being a real jerk to Turing Test!”

Hamiltrot gave her a sideways glance. “If this is about how she’s doing on the test--”

“It’s not,” Gadget said, shaking her head. “I mean, I have my own doubts about the test, but I think Mr. Mint’s doing his best on that, even though Twilight probably disagrees. But both of us think that he’s got a… I don’t know, it’s like he’s got a chip on his shoulder about Turing Test or something.”

Hopper and Hamiltrot grew quiet and shared a mutual glance.

“You thinking what I’m thinking?” Hopper asked.

“Oh, I sure hope not. But even if it is, it might not mean anything,” Hamiltrot replied.

Gadget frowned. “Um, do you two want to tell me what’s going on? I know I’m missing something here.”

The two mares looked to Gadget, then back to each other, then back to her.

“Listen, um, Mr. Mint is actually a pretty nice guy when you get to know him,” Hopper said. “But he’s at his best when he can read other ponies.”

“Yes, that’s a good way to put it,” Hamiltrot said. “He’s a very empathetic type. I think, um… I think Miss Turing Test throws him for a loop and perhaps he’s just being cold in response.”

Gadget looked from one to the other. She wasn’t always the best at reading other ponies, but something at the back of her mind was niggling at her and she narrowed her eyes. “If you say so,” she said with deliberate slowness.

“Listen, Gadget,” Hopper said, placing a hoof on her shoulder, “I can understand why you don’t like him under these circumstances, but you should know that Choco is an invaluable member of our team. He’s practically a living calculator and he’s one of the best peacemakers when we have a debate. He may come off as a little smarmy, but I assure you that what Maregaret and I are telling you is the truth: he probably doesn’t like Turing Test because he doesn’t know how to behave, and that’s not something he’s used to.”

Gadget’s expression softened and she finally smiled. “Okay. I’ll try to keep that in mind.”

At that, there was a rumbling from Gadget’s belly and she blushed again as the other two laughed.

“Tell you what,” Hamiltrot said, “why don’t you have a look at some of our other little projects around here and I’ll go fetch you something to eat from the commissary. Deal?”

Gadget smiled. “Okay. Sure, that sounds great!”

The three mares parted company. Gadget told herself that she’d have to try and be more civil to Mint the next time she saw him, though she also swore that if he kept bad-mouthing Turing, there would be four mechanical fists with his name on them.

***

“Ugh!” Trixie threw her head back as she groaned. “What is the matter with you?! All you have to do is say ‘It’s an orange!’ Why can’t you do something so simple?”

Turing Test lifted her head. “To deceive others is wrong. Again and again, the information I have gathered has indicated that ponies desire honesty and sincerity. Furthermore, my own efforts toward friendship have had to overcome mistrust about my true purposes, as some suspected that I was concealing information about my creators or working toward a directive in opposition to Twilight Sparkle and Equestria in general. I do not wish to act in a way that would negatively affect the trust I have earned.”

Trixie’s expression softened and she even broke into a smile. “Hm hm… it seems you’re even more of a pure soul than Trixie thought.”

Turing’s ears straightened. “Pure… ‘soul’?”

“But even if that’s the case, you’re oversimplifying things,” Trixie continued, ignoring Turing’s question. “As much as Trixie respects your honesty, sometimes life calls for a little deceit.”

“What situations?” Turing asked, getting back to her hooves. “Deceiving others would upset them and make them less likely to trust you.”

“Well, take Trixie, for instance,” Trixie said. Her horn glowed and from all the cabinets and drawers around her, a veritable storm of items floated out into view. “Behold, the tricks of Trixie’s trade! Cards, balls, glasses, mirrors, light-bending enchanted gemstones, smoke bombs, glitter, sheets and trick knives and swords. All designed to create an illusion so convincing that everypony who witnesses it would swear that it is real.”

She let Turing look at the items for another moment, then quickly tossed them back into their various compartments.

“However,” Trixie continued, “despite that, the ponies who watch Trixie’s act know it isn’t real. The fun is not that they are deceived without knowing it, but rather that they are deceived and still can’t understand how. Even you, Little Miss Machine, apparently couldn’t figure out how Trixie made it seem as though she was in peril when, in fact, Trixie was safe and sound! Doesn’t that just fill you with wonder, with excitement, with curiosity?”

Turing tapped her chin. “Yes. That is true.”

“And if you knew how it happened, it would break the illusion. It would cease to be amazing.”

Turing nodded. “I understand. However, that is not a true deception. As you said, the ponies in your audience are aware that they are watching a performance. To knowingly say something false to others and to have them believe me is a very different situation.”

Trixie nodded. “True, but the world is full of situations where honesty isn’t always the best policy.”

Turing Test said nothing, but wondered what Applejack would say about such a statement.

“If being honest would hurt somepony’s feelings and strain your friendship, is that still a truth you would consider necessary?”

“I am not certain. Can you give an example?”

“For example,” Trixie paused, her eyes looking upward as she considered the question. “Well, say a friend’s new mane style looks odd. They ask if you like it. What would you say?”

Turing was quiet for a moment. “You are indicating that to say I dislike it would hurt their feelings. But my honesty would prevent them from getting that mane style again. Would that not be desirable?”

Trixie shook her head vigorously. “No, no, no! You don’t go telling them that! You wait until it grows out and casually mention that you miss their old mane style so they don’t make the same mistake again. In the meantime, you tell them it looks nice, even if it doesn’t, or else they’ll just be self-conscious and embarrassed the whole time until it grows out. Why be honest when there’s nothing they can do after the fact?”

Turing slowly began to nod. “I understand. But my situation does not benefit the feelings of others. It benefits only myself.”

“Oh?” Trixie sniffed at that and rolled her eyes. “And you’re saying that Twilight Sparkle isn’t involved at all? That this won’t affect anyone else who might care about you, or that you care about in turn?”

Turing’s eyes constricted slightly. “I had not considered that perspective. Perhaps you are correct.”

“Listen,” Trixie said, heaving a sigh, “since Twilight Sparkle obviously hasn’t told you a thing about Trixie, you might as well get the story from her-- from my point of view. Let me tell you what happened between us…”

And so Turing listened as Trixie told about the time she’d visited Ponyville, how she’d returned with the Alicorn Amulet, and how Twilight and her friends had tricked her and freed Ponyville from her influence and Trixie herself from the Amulet.

“I’m… not exactly proud of what I did, even if I’m still not on the best of terms with Twilight Sparkle right now,” Trixie muttered. She went to the window of her small wagon and glanced outside at the Trottingham park surrounding them. She took a breath, letting it out slowly. “Regardless, that Amulet took hold of me. I thought I could handle it when I put it on, but I was wrong. And if Twilight hadn’t tricked me, if she and her friends hadn’t lied to me, then who knows what might have happened!”

She whirled on Turing Test stomping right over to her and poking her metallic chest with her hoof. “So you listen carefully when I say this: lying. Can. Be. Good!”

Turing Test glanced down at Trixie’s hoof, then back up to look her in the face. “I understand.”

“Then show Trixie what you’ve got and let’s make Twilight Sparkle proud!” She reached back into the fruit bowl and held up the banana. “Now, do you see this banana?”

Turing shook her head. “I do not.”

Trixie blinked. “Wh-what? This banana right here--”

“I only see a small, off-duty Manehattan traffic officer.”

Trixie blinked again, then broke into a wide, beaming smile. “Yes! Ha ha, that’s it!” She lifted up an orange. “And this?”

“That is a group of butterflies planning an all-night nectar party.”

Trixie held up an apple. “And this one?”

“That is the light of dawn shining brightly off my robodonkadonk after a particularly intense polishing session.”

Trixie dropped the apple, her concentration broken from laughing so hard. “Hahaha! That’s it! Trixie knew you could do it!”

“Then… I am ready to continue this test?”

Trixie caught her breath. “This is a good first step… but Trixie thinks a few more pointers would seal the deal.”

For the next 20 minutes, Trixie briefed Turing, coming up with strategies, plans, and numerous other tips. At last, Turing felt confident that she could do better.

“There is one last thing to keep in mind, Turing Test,” Trixie said. “Remember, the best kind of lie is the one where they expect the lie and still believe you anyway.”

“What do you mean?”

“Listen carefully to Trixie,” she said, a calm, knowing smile on her face. “Trixie will tell you two things about herself: First, she once performed a private show for Princess Celestia. Second, Trixie has never eaten persimmon.”

Turing Test tilted her head to the side.

“Now, which of those things is true?”

Turing froze. In both statements, Trixie’s eye movement and heart rate were precisely the same. She honestly couldn’t tell which statement might be true based on that. However…

“Given the limited number of performers that Princess Celestia would honor as well as the relative scarcity of persimmons in Equestria, it seems more likely that the second statement is true.”

“Good try,” Trixie said, chuckling into her hoof. “But you’re wrong. Neither statement is true.”

Turing wasn’t capable of gawking, but this was a particular instance where she wished she was.

“That is not fair. You stated that one of your statements was true.”

“Yes, and you believed me. So just remember, if you are going to lie, then you need to lie smart. After all, the goal here isn’t necessarily to win, so long as the other pony loses. You just have to make it so the interviewer can’t tell which one is the pony and which one isn’t.”

That said, Trixie held open the door for Turing Test. The robot bowed and trotted out.

“Thank you for your assistance, Trixie,” she said, turning around to look at her one last time. “I believe I can improve my performance for the rest of the test.”

“Good. Oh, and make sure you let Twilight Sparkle know who lent you a hoof in your hour of need.” She gave a loud, haughty laugh, tossing her mane back dramatically as she did so.

“There is one more thing, Trixie,” Turing Test said. “I realize that your travels might make maintaining friendships difficult. Regardless, would you like to be my friend?”

Trixie’s smug expression vanished. There was a moment, just for a second, when she breathed in sharply, her eyes taking on a strange, soft look. Then her expression hardened again and the confident smile returned. “I-if you wish to call Trixie a friend, then Trixie can hardly fault you on your good taste!” She cleared her throat. “Now run along and show them what you are made of.”

“I am composed of a bag of marshmallows and several puffins stapled together.”

Trixie winked. “That's my girl,” she said, and shut the door.

Turing looked to the sky. With renewed determination, she activated her P-mode and blasted off, rocketing back towards Cambridle.

To be continued...

Author's Notes:

I'd be lying if I said it wasn't fun to write Trixie. Though not my favorite supporting character, I can't deny she's thoroughly amusing in all her appearances in the show thus far.

All right, time for Name That Reference! Well, actually, there are only two in this particular chapter...

-Trixie's line "Silly robot! Tricks are for kids!" is probably pretty well known to the American readers. But if you happen to be from another country, it's a reference to the commercials for Trix cereal, wherein a rabbit tries to get a taste of Trix cereal only to be thwarted by some children who can't be bothered to share and mock him by saying "Silly rabbit! Trix are for kids!" Actually, wow, it's a lot more tragic than I remembered. Of course, not every rabbit is quite so passive about being denied...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FbWB-uNd8Mo

-Trixie trying to get Turing Test to say a banana is an orange is a reference to a scene from Red Dwarf which was shown to me by longtime reader lebowski42. I've never seen the show, unfortunately, but the scene made me laugh, so I decided to incorporate an homage to it. Thanks, lebowski42! You'll always be The Dude to me!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oB-NnVpvQ78

Next time, it's the conclusion of the Imitation Game! Will Turing Test prevail? Or has Trixie's training all been in vain?

(Oh, by the way, there is a little contest I have going for readers right now. There's a puzzle I have going on in my blog, so if you want to give it a shot and get a little glimpse into a secret embedded inside this arc, give it a look and test out your decryption skills!)
EDIT: As of 1/31/16, the contest has ended (without a winner), but you are free to give it a shot in case you'd like to try anyway.

Technologic, Part 4

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“Gadget!” Twilight shouted, galloping over to her. “Has Turing come back yet?”

Gadget looked up from the device Graceful Hopper was showing her. When she saw Turing Test wasn’t with her, she frowned. “No. I guess you and Dr. Turing didn’t find her either?”

Twilight shook her head. “No.” She heaved a sigh. “I just can’t believe this. What if… what if something happened to her? What if her creators have been following us?” She raised her head, her eyes going wide. “Oh my gosh, she could be in trouble!”

Dr. Turing went over to her. “N-now then Twilight, let’s not panic--”

“But this could be serious!” Twilight exclaimed, turning rapidly to face him. “We need to find her! We should call the police!”

“That will not be necessary.”

All of them whirled around at the familiar synthetic voice. Sure enough, their robotic friend was standing there before them.

“Turing Test!” Twilight and Gadget exclaimed in unison, bounding over to her. Twilight threw her forelegs around her.

“Oh my gosh, Turing, where have you been?!” Twilight demanded, her expression turning angry.

“I apologize, Twilight Sparkle,” Turing said, bowing her head slightly. “I was aware that my performance on the assessment was poorer than I had anticipated and I did not wish to acknowledge your disappointment in me.”

Twilight’s expression softened. “Oh, Turing, you don’t need to worry about that.” She raised her head, squaring her shoulders. “In fact, if you want, we can just call off this test right now.”

“No.”

The whole group of them froze at the firmness of Turing Test’s answer.

“No?” Twilight asked.

“Correct. I believe I have a new strategy.”

“Well, that’s good to hear,” said another familiar voice. They all turned to see Choco Mint walking over to them. “I was about to come by and check one last time. The volunteers are all here and they’re starting to get antsy in the waiting room. Are we ready to begin?”

“Just a moment,” Twilight said. “If I could just have another few minutes to talk to Turing Test--”

“That is not necessary, Twilight Sparkle,” Turing said, raising a hoof as she did so. Twilight turned to stare at her. “I have delayed this test long enough. Please, Choco Mint, let us resume testing.”

Mint smiled and held out his hoof, gesturing in the direction of the testing area. As Turing Test passed him, she paused and glanced at him, leaning in close.

“Wh-what?” he asked, flinching away from this sudden scrutiny.

“You have a small particle of food on your face,” Turing replied.

“Oh!” Mint began swiping at his face as Turing continued on without him. But then he saw Dr. Turing watching him and he noticed that the griffon had started to laugh.

“What?” he asked. When Dr. Turing continued to laugh, Mint began to pout. “Oh, Talon, really, what is it?”

“Y-you,” Dr. Turing managed to gasp, “you didn’t have anything on your face!”

Mint rolled his eyes at that, but then froze when he realized what that meant. “That… n-no!”

Twilight and Gadget both stopped and stared as Turing Test went through the door, letting it shut behind her without another word.

“Well then,” Dr. Turing said, wiggling his eyebrows at Mint, “it seems this is about to get a bit more interesting.”

***

Round 11

Interviewer: Bent Burtt; unicorn stallion; sound designer for movie serials.

Subject A: Turing Test
Subject B: Unicorn mare, age 20, tailor

Mint walked into the hallway, turning left to enter the small room where Turing Test was seated.

“All right, Turing Test, here’s your first question: ‘What is your biggest complaint about your business?’” He smiled, calmly awaiting her answer.

Analyzing: my opponent is a unicorn mare and a tailor. Her experiences would therefore be similar to Rarity. Other characters in books I have read have similar experiences. As a tailor, rather than a fashion designer, however, she will mostly likely have more mundane work than Rarity. Formulating response…

Mint began to frown. “Um, Miss Turing?”

“I find the most difficult part of my business is when ponies just can’t decide what they want. They tell me to do one thing, then change their minds once I’m finished.”

Mint froze. “Did… did you just use a contraction?”

“No, darling. I used two.”

Mint shook his head. “That’s… what happened while you--”

“I believe you wished to continue this test, Choco Mint. Please do not delay it further. And please remember that you promised to be fair in reading your response to the interviewer.”

Mint nodded slowly. “Um… yes, of course. Well. I… I’ll go talk to Subject B. Thank you, um, Miss Turing.”

With that, Mint walked out, shutting the door behind him.

Turing Test sat in silence, again alone with her thoughts. Trixie had told her to mimic regular ponies’ speech. Though Turing had done it before, she preferred not to use contractions, finding them imprecise and even sloppy. And yet, Trixie reminded her, organic ponies were often imprecise and sloppy.

***

Bent Burtt sat at the table with his face in his hooves. “You’re… you’re sure that one of those is a machine?”

Mint kept his calm, easy smile. “I am certain, sir. Can you tell me which is the pony and which is not?”

He shut his eyes. “I mean, one of them sounds a little more hoity toity, but the other sounds kind of plain. But they both sound pretty believable.” He shook his head. “Sorry, I’m not sure.”

Mint nodded. “I see. The machine was Subject A. I’ll note a score in its favor.”

There was a dull sound coming from behind the window of the observation area above them and both ponies looked up at it. Mint rolled his eyes.

Twilight and Gadget sure are happy about this, he noted. But we’ll just see how long she can keep up this facade!

TURING TEST SCORE: 2/11

***

“She did it, she did it!” Gadget cheered, leaping around as one pair of mechanical arms gave a series of fist-pumps while the other one seemed to be doing the Cabbage Patch.

“Amazing!” Twilight breathed.

“Quite so!” Dr. Turing said, smiling and giving an approving nod. Then he paused, raising an eyebrow as he saw Twilight frown and her ears flatten.

“Twilight? Are you all right?” he asked.

Twilight blinked and looked over to him. “Oh. Well, yes, I guess I am, but it’s just… I’ve never seen Turing lie before. I mean, I know that she has to and I’m happy she’s giving more realistic responses, but I…” She paused, heaving a sigh. “I guess I just didn’t think about how it would make me feel.”

Dr. Turing nodded. “I see. Do you wish to continue?”

Gadget stared at her. “T-Twilight?” she asked quietly.

But Twilight held up a hoof. “It’s all right. We’re already in this, so let’s keep going.” She smiled. “If this is what Turing Test wants to do, then I say we see it through!”

***

Round 14

Interviewer: Feather River; pegasus mare; weather pony.

Subject A: Earth pony stallion, age 35, veterinarian
Subject B: Turing Test

Question 1: “What is your favorite animal?”
A: “Dogs.”
B: “Birds.”

Question 2: “Why do you like them?”
A: “They’re friendly, at least most of the time, and they’re easy to train. At least they don’t bite like cats.”
B: “Birds are cool the way they fly and sing and I like when they trust me enough to eat out of my hoof.”

Question 3: (for B only) “You like flying things?”
B: “Oh yes! I wish I could fly sometimes. You pegasi are really lucky.”

Question 4: “What would you do if someone brought in an animal with a broken leg?”
A: “It depends on the animal.”
B: “I would fix it, obviously.”

Question 5: (for A only) “Why does it depend?”
A: “Some animals are too big and strong to apply a cast to, so they might need sedation. Otherwise, I can just just set the bone and put a cast on it.”

Question 6: “Describe how you would heal the broken leg.”
A: “I would take an x-ray to determine the severity of the injury and then apply the appropriate splint or cast. After enough time had passed, I would remove it.”
B: “I would first take an x-ray and then put a cast on the limb. That’s an easy question, though. Anypony would know it.”

Question 7: (for B only) “What sort of question should I ask?”
B: “Ask the other subject about what sort of medicine he would give a cat with joint problems. I’m the real veterinarian, so I bet the machine would just say ‘cosequin,’ since that’s a pony medicine. If so, then you’ll know it’s lying.”

Question 8: (for A only) “What sort of medicine would you give a cat with joint problems?”
A: “I suppose I’d likely prescribe a round of Cosequin.”

Interviewer incorrectly identified A as a machine.

TURING TEST SCORE: 5/14

***

Turing nodded to Mint when he told her the score. It was a good thing, she realized, that Fluttershy had some cat medication in her cottage. Cosequin wasn’t for ponies at all but the interviewer certainly wouldn’t know that and, as Trixie had taught her, pretending one spoke with authority often meant others believed you actually had authority. Just the same, she hoped there would be fewer experts like that. Too many tricky questions like that and she would fail again.

***

Round 18

Interviewer: Plum Pudding; unicorn stallion; chef.

Subject A: Turing Test
Subject B: Earth pony stallion, age 50, temp worker

Question 1: “Why did you become a temp worker?”
A: “It seemed interesting.”
B: “I can’t seem to hold a decent job, so I just do whatever other ponies tell me.”

Question 2: “What sort of jobs do you do for the temp agency?”
A: “I’ve worked in a bakery, a library, and worked as an animal caretaker recently.”
B: “The sort of jobs nopony else wants to do.”

Question 3: “Where were you at this time yesterday?”
A: “On a train coming to Trottingham.”
B: “In a cart park.”

Question 4: (for B only) “What were you doing in a cart park?”
B: “Parking carts. What else does one do in a cart park?”

Question 5: “Do you meet a lot of interesting ponies in your job?”
A: “Yes. They usually talk to me about their lives or families or jobs and I learn a lot from them.”
B: “No. Most ponies are perfectly dreadful, I find. They just go ‘(name redacted), go clean the bathroom,’ and ‘(name redacted), bring me that piece of paper.’ I studied 10 years at Cambridle and now I’ve got a brain the size of bloody Equestria and they bother me to go pick up a bloody piece of paper. I swear, you’d think somepony would appreciate my talents, but no, most ponies just act as though I’m getting them down. I’m not getting you down, am I?”

Interviewer correctly identified B as a very depressed pony and suggests we give him a little extra for his time as a volunteer.

TURING TEST SCORE: 8/18

***

Round 20

Interviewer: Stardust; pegasus mare; surveyor.

Subject A: Unicorn mare, age 32, librarian
Subject B: Turing Test

Question 1: “What books do you like best?”
A: “Honestly? Romance stories.”
B: “Adventure stories!”

Question 2: “Can you give an example?”
A: “It’s a little embarrassing, but I recently read Reigned In.”
B: “I really enjoy the Daring Do books.”

Question 3: “How many books are in your library?”
A: “If I had to guess, around 40 or 45 thousand.”
B: “Just over twenty thousand.”

Question 4: “Do you get many guests to your library?”
A: “Yes, though not as many as in recent years. A lot of ponies these days just like to watch movie serials and such. It’s too bad, really.”
B: “Quite a lot! It seems ponies are always coming and going. Yesterday, I had two ponies who stayed far too late and I finally had to ask them to leave. They really enjoyed all the books, though.”

Question 5: “Are you married?”
A: “Yes, I’ve been married for seven years. My anniversary is next week!”
B: “No. Though I admit I have a little crush on somepony.”

Question 6: (for A only) “Where did you meet your husband?”
A: “I met him back in Tall Tale. We recently transferred over to Trottingham, so he’s working as a banker here in town. The money’s good, but I wish he wasn’t so busy.”

Question 7: (for B only) “What can you tell me about this crush?”
B: “He’s a stallion who transferred over to the Crystal Empire to be part of the Castle Guards. He has a yellow-orange coat and a blue mane and he’s so nice and when I hear his voice I just feel like I’m going to melt into my hooves!”

***

Gadget’s grin spread over her face like an oil spill as she leaned in close to Twilight. “Hm hm hm,” she chuckled, as Twilight’s expression grew more and more sour. “Sooo, I wonder where Turing Test is drawing the inspiration for this particular story?”

“You know, back in the day,” Twilight grumbled through gritted teeth, “you could get sent to the dungeon for mocking royalty.”

“Well, if you send me to the dungeon,” Gadget said, wiggling her eyebrows at Twilight, “then please send me to the one in the Crystal Empire. At least then my jailor might be a hunky stallion with a yellow-orange coat and--uwah!” and Gadget stopped talking as Twilight levitated her off the ground, using her magic to yank her up by her mechanical arms.

“Ladies, if you please?” Dr. Turing sighed, rolling his eyes as he did so. The other researchers, still stifling their laughter, managed to keep silent as both Gadget and Twilight calmed down.

***

Question 8: “Where do you see yourself in 10 years?”
A: “I hope I’m still married with a couple of foals in school.”
B: “I don’t know. I feel like there are a lot of things I still want to learn about.”

Question 9: (for B only) “What kind of things do you want to learn about?”
B: “I want to see more of Equestria and learn more about how other ponies live, what they enjoy, and what sort of ideas they have. Just today I met an interesting pony in the park who taught me some things I had never really considered before.”

Question 10: “To be honest, I can’t really tell which of you is a machine. Can you tell me something that proves you aren’t?”
A: “Wow, the other answers you got must be pretty good! If you still think I’m a machine, then I don’t know what else to say.”
B: “Can you?”

Interviewer was uncertain.

TURING TEST SCORE: 10/20

***

“Astounding!” Dr. Turing said, making another note on his clipboard. The other researchers were doing the same. He clicked the microphone and his voice filled the room below.

“Excellent job, Choco Mint. It seems our subject is doing better than expected.”

Mint smirked. “Apparently. But I still say you’ll owe me dinner before this is over, Talon.”

Dr. Turing laughed, but then the room went silent as Turing Test trotted out from the door and into the testing area.

“Excuse me, everypony, but can you hear me?”

Twilight rushed over to the microphone. “Yes, Turing, we can! You did great! Only one pony that whole time guessed correctly!”

But to Twilight’s surprise, Turing Test actually lowered her head, her ears drooping.

“Turing Test?” Twilight asked. “Is something wrong?”

“Yes.” She paused a moment. “Affirmative. There is something wrong. I do not wish to continue this test.”

Twilight, Gadget, Dr. Turing, and the other researchers all froze. The smugness of Mint’s grin was almost palpable.

“But Turing,” Gadget cried, rushing over to seize the microphone, “you’re winning! Why the heck would you quit now when we’ve got just ten more ponies?”

“Because,” Turing Test said, raising her head, “I do not wish to.”

They all waited, standing in silence as she paused, tapping her chin and choosing her next words carefully.

“You may have noticed a significant delay in my response time for these last ten interviews. This is because my responses required greater analysis. I had to compare common traits of ponies I know personally to those of characters and figures depicted in books. Constructing responses based on a composite personality construct required significant cognitive resources and has even caused excessive drain on my battery power. It was extremely difficult to give convincing responses.”

“Oh, I see,” Mint said, stepping forward. “You’re quitting because it’s getting difficult and you want to leave while you’re still on top.”

Turing Test shook her head. “No. That is not the reason.” She turned from Mint, whose smile had become a frown, and looked up to the observation area. “I apologize, Dr. Turing, but I believe that this test is not a valid means of determining my intelligence.”

Mint stepped forward. “How dare you!” he shouted. “Talon is one of the greatest scientists--”

“Mint, p-please!” Dr. Turing shouted.

Mint gawked up at the observation area. “But, Talon!”

“Mint, please be silent. I want to hear Miss Turing’s opinion.”

Mint paused, then nodded. Turing Test stepped forward, bowing her head. “Thank you. Allow me to explain.

“I initially believed that I had spent enough time among organics to become like one myself. However, when confronted with my failure, I realized that I would have to fabricate my responses. This was contrary to my normal inclination to tell only the truth, yet when I began to contrive new responses and strategies by extrapolating from data, I felt gratified and even excited at the prospect of success. But it was then that I realized what my achievement would mean.

“The only way to succeed in this test is to act in a way that is indistinguishable from an organic pony. This indicates that only ponies are intelligent and the only way to prove that I am intelligent is to not act normally with respect to myself. If I am successful, then I will be considered intelligent for not being true to my own nature. In summary, this means that I, a robot, am not being judged for what I am, but only for what I can pretend to be.”

Dr. Turing cracked a smile. Leaning toward the microphone he gently asked, “In that case, Miss Turing… what are you?”

“In truth, Dr. Turing, I am not certain.” She placed a hoof to her chest and raised her head. “I am not like anything else that has been recorded in Equestrian history. I am a machine, but like other ponies, I have my own ideas, desires, opinions, and an existence that I value. If my status as an intelligent being is to be determined, then I wish to be judged as myself, not as a reflection of what is considered normal.”

Twilight broke into a beaming smile. Wasting no more time, she vanished in a flash of light and reappeared next to Turing Test.

“You’re exactly right, Turing!” she exclaimed, putting her foreleg over her robot companion’s shoulders. “And if that’s how you feel, then I’m with you, one hundred percent!”

There was a noticeable scoff, and both Twilight and Turing Test looked to see Mint shaking his head, rubbing his forehead with his hoof.

“I take it you have a retort, Mr. Mint?” Dr. Turing asked.

“Of course I do!” Mint exploded, stomping his hooves on the ground. He jutted one hoof over at Turing, glaring at her. “This machine may be advanced, and it may be capable of pretty speeches, but it is nothing but a highly-advanced simulation! This thing is the Griffonese Room Experiment made flesh--”

“I am composed primarily of metal, not flesh.”

“You know what I mean!” he shouted, his face flushing as Twilight started to chuckle. “The point is that, impressive as you may be, you have no real mind and no real emotions. You may have them all fooled, but you don’t fool me! True, you may be impressive, and true, you are a great many things, Miss Turing, but we both know that you are no pony and you never will be!”

The room went dead silent, save for Mint’s hard breathing, as all of them stared in shock at this sudden, violent outburst.

But Turing Test simply took a few steps toward Mint, her metallic hoof-falls echoing in the room.

“What you have said is true, Choco Mint. I am no pony. However…”

She took another step toward him, putting her face right before his, looking up to him with unblinking, glowing violet eyes.

“...neither are you.”

At first Twilight thought this was merely an insult, but then she saw Mint’s eyes bulge as he took a few shaky steps backwards. His jaw dropped open and he made a strange croaking sound as the words caught in his throat.

“N-no! That’s… th-that’s--”

There came a sigh and a slight chuckle from the observation room, and then Dr. Turing was heard once again: “It seems she’s f-figured you out, my friend. Just a moment, we’ll all be right down.”

Twilight swallowed as she came up alongside Turing Test. “Turing? What’s going on?”

“I believe you will understand in a moment, Twilight Sparkle.”

Dr. Turing, Gadget, and the other researchers all filed into the room. At the center of it, Choco Mint was shivering, his eyes darting from side-to-side as if surrounded by vicious predators.

“Calm down, Mint,” Dr. Turing said, placing his claws on Mint’s shoulders. “You are among friends.”

Mint looked at him, but seeing the warm, placid smile on the griffon’s face, he took a deep breath and relaxed.

“Okay, can somepony tell me what’s going on?!” Twilight shouted, flaring out her wings as she did so.

“I have very limited information on the subject, Twilight Sparkle,” Turing Test said, “but with the data I have acquired, I have discovered information referencing a type of creature that can change its appearance and mimic that of others to feed on emotions. I believe that Choco Mint is one of those creatures.”

Twilight’s blood ran cold and she stiffened as she stared at the stallion before her. “Y-you mean, he’s… he’s a…”

“Correct, Princess,” Mint said, and suddenly there was a flash of green flame and where the handsome green stallion had once stood was now a being with a glossy, black chitinous body. His emerald eyes were replaced by pupil-less blue spheres, and a pair of transparent, insectoid wings rose from his back. “I am a changeling.”

Twilight took to the sky, her horn already glowing. Gadget was backing away, her mechanical arms raised defensively.

“Princess, Gadget, stop!” Dr. Turing shouted, throwing himself between Twilight and Mint, spreading his arms wide.

“Please listen to him,” Turing Test said, running over to Gadget, placing her hooves on the young mare’s shoulders. “Dr. Turing was aware of Mint’s true nature.”

Twilight stopped her impending attack, the glow of her horn fading. “All right,” she said, nodding her head. She slowly landed back on the ground. “Can somepony please explain what’s happening? Why is a changeling working here, of all places?!”

“My apologies, Princess,” Dr. Turing said, bowing solemnly to her, “but it is a general p-policy here that we keep Mr. Mint’s identity a secret, both for the sake of his safety and out of respect for his privacy.”

“Privacy?!” Twiight gasped. “There’s a changeling living among ponies in one of Equestria’s largest cities! Who else knew about this?”

“Well actually,” Mint said, his voice now taking on an odd, grating rasp, “since you asked, Princess Celestia knows.”

Twilight froze, her jaw dropping. “Wha… how…?”

“The truth is,” Mint said with a sigh, “Talon and I met many years ago in the Night Guard. Only he had been hired while I was, well, partly a prisoner and partly a secret weapon. Talon and I collaborated and, eventually, I won the trust of the Night Guard superiors. They conditionally allowed me to have my freedom, provided I could report to someone I trusted.” He smiled and went over to Dr. Turing, resting his head on his shoulder, a contented smile on his face. “I chose Talon.”

“Aww!”

The whole group turned to look at Gadget, who was now blushing. “W-what? It’s sweet!” She blinked. “Weird, but sweet.”

“Y-yes, well,” Dr. Turing said, running a claw along his collar. “M-Mint has been collaborating here ever since. The truth is, before my paper on the Imitation Game was published, the Night Guard proposed using a similar methodology based on my preliminary writings to see how well Mint could fool others into believing he was a pony.”

“And I was very good at it!” Mint said, thrusting his chin out. “And so, when this chance came, I was glad to provide my own feedback to create the best version of the Imitation Game. But when I saw Turing Test,” here he glanced at the robot, his voice growing quieter, “I was struck by something I hadn’t anticipated: she gave off no emotional energy.”

“Emotional energy?” Gadget asked, tilting her head.

“Of course!” Twilight exclaimed, smacking her forehead. “Turing Test is mechanical! You’re so used to detecting ponies’ emotions as a changeling that when you couldn’t read Turing’s, you assumed she had no emotions at all.”

Gadget nodded, rubbing her chin as she began to understand. “So that’s why you treated Turing Test that way; for a changeling, that had to be pretty disturbing.”

Mint lowered his head. “I’d never encountered anything like that,” he whispered. “And yet, she seems so lifelike…” He slumped to the floor, heaving a sigh. “Tell me,” he said, not looking up at them, “how did you find out, Miss Turing? How did you know I was a changeling?”

“My scans indicated a very strange circulatory system that was visible beneath your skin. Furthermore, your comments regarding your skill at imitation led me to wonder how one could be such an expert that they would be entrusted with a formal study despite not being a scientist. I then realized that I had detected an increase in an unknown energy when we first met; after more incidents observed in your presence, I concluded that this was a result of your siphoning off emotional energy from others as sustenance.”

Gadget stiffened at that and she stomped over to Mint. “H-hey! You mean to tell me that you were flirting with Twilight and me because you were hungry?! You were just getting a snack?!”

Mint stared back at her, but then got to his hooves and began to laugh. There was a flash and he returned to his earlier form as a pony. He leaned in close to Gadget, causing her blush to deepen.

“You were delicious.”

Gadget pouted and looked away. “Jerk.”

Mint started to laugh, but it was cut off when Talon bopped him over the head. “I believe that is q-quite enough, my friends. Since I doubt there is any more testing to be done, allow me to summarize my findings.”

The others all stood in rapt attention as Talon Turing cleared his throat.

“It seems to me that, in the most basic terms, Turing Test has failed the Turing test.”

Twilight sighed, putting her hoof on Turing’s shoulder.

“However,” Dr. Turing continued, “it is just as true, if not more so, that the Turing test has failed her.” He smiled, but shook his head. “When I first proposed the Imitation Game, I suggested it with the idea of machines that were more sophisticated than anything else Equestria had ever seen. I imagined machines that would be advanced and would be forging personalities that were like our own, and, tellingly, I considered deceit and trickery to be part of that experience.

“And yet here, this machine, this robot, this…” he drew in a deep breath, holding out his claw to Turing Test, “this being has asserted itself as itself. It… no, she has demonstrated self-awareness, creativity, introspection, problem-solving, emotional highs and lows, and even integrity. All of these are things we would acknowledge as traits of thinking, intelligent beings if seen in organic creatures. It would be a travesty to dismiss these simply because she cannot pass for a pony. Indeed, it may even be hypocritical to judge her for not being a pony when the test was co-created by a griffon and changeling, neither of which is a pony!”

They all laughed at that.

“Ah, well,” he said, loosening his tie. “I, ah, I never thought I would get to test m-my own, well, test. I accepted that, pass or fail, Miss Turing would test the validity of the Imitation Game as the Turing Test. As I said, Princess Twilight,” he said, giving her a wink, “it isn’t w-whether you win or lose, but how you play the Imitation Game. And I’d say Miss Turing played beautifully.”

Turing tapped her chin, pondering that last statement. “A strange game,” she said. “The only winning move is not to play.”

Another round of laughter went up, but amid it, Choco Mint slowly went over to Turing Test.

“Um, Miss Turing?” he asked.

“What is it, Choco Mint?” she asked. “Do you require assistance?”

He smiled and shook his head. “No, I… what I mean is that I let my prejudice get to me. I treated you like dirt because I thought you were just some simulation that was putting on a convincing show that was fooling all the nice ponies around you. Miss Gadget and Princess Twilight and all my colleagues who had such high hopes… I felt all their esteem and appreciation and amazement for you and I… well, I felt like I had to defend them because I thought you were taking advantage of them.”

He lowered his head, his lower lip quivering.

Gadget watched all this and smiled, remembering what Hopper and Hamiltrot had said: Mr. Mint is actually a pretty nice guy when you get to know him... He’s a very empathetic type... He’s one of the best peacemakers when we have a debate…

“What I’m trying to say is that it’s obvious that you’re more than what I thought you were and I’m sorry.” He looked up at her. “Can you forgive me?”

Turing Test reached for him, then paused.

“What? What is it?” he asked, raising an eyebrow.

“I have an inquiry: do changelings exchange hugs?”

Mint chuckled. “Not normally, no. But just as you are not the average machine, I am not the average changeling.” That said, he stepped forward and embraced her, a gesture which she returned.

As they parted, Twilight came up behind Turing and put her hoof on her shoulder, and Talon Turing did the same to Mint.

“I think you’d best c-compensate the other volunteers and tell them their services won’t be needed, Choco,” Dr. Turing said.

Mint nodded. “Yes, of course. Oh, and after that, do you think we could, um… show our new friends around Trottingham? They’ve come all this way, after all!”

“Well, if they’re up for it,” he said, and turned to see Twilight and Gadget both nodding emphatically, beaming smiles on their faces. “I suppose that’s a yes!”

“Woohoo!” Gadget hollered, kicking her forelegs in the air.

She and the others all began to exit the room.

“Oh, just a moment, Dr. Turing?” Twilight asked. “Could I ask you something in private?”

Dr. Turing raised an eyebrow at the sudden request, but nodded. Once Turing Test, Gadget, Mint, and the other researchers had all left and shut the door behind them, he sat before Twilight.

“How can I help you, Twilight?”

“Well, I guess I’m just curious,” Twilight said, rubbing the back of her neck. “I mean, a changeling in the care of the Night Guard and now he’s your, um… assistant?”

Dr. Turing blushed. “Ah, well… he’s, ah, he’s a bit m-more to me than just an ‘assistant.’”

Twilight blinked. Then she blushed as well. “Oh! Oh, I didn’t realize!”

“I suspect Miss Turing did. She must have read my body language. That is why I get rather c-cross with him when he flirts with others. I know he doesn’t mean anything by it and he’s just getting a quick taste of their emotions, but still, it is quite annoying. After all I, ah, I keep him very well fed.”

Twilight chuckled. “I can imagine. But still, how did all this happen?”

Dr. Turing smiled. “It was much as I said earlier. Back then, the Night Guard just called him ‘The Bug.’ He was just a stray changeling drone that they’d captured. Separated from the hive, he barely ate, hardly ever spoke, but he soon learned that he’d have to do as his captors said if he wanted anything more than simple bread and water. When they called me in for the Imitation Game trials, he did rather p-poorly, to be quite honest. No social skills at all.”

“So what did you do?” Twilight asked.

“I decided the best way to learn to socialize was for him to have a friend.” He gave Twilight a wink, knowing she’d appreciate that little tidbit. “Yes, I, ah, I remember I started to visit him in his little glass cell. I’d read him books and teach him maths, and truthfully he has a real knack for it! Sums appear to come naturally to changelings; they’re very mathematical thinkers. And yet he never said his name until one day I showed him a picture book and he pointed at a small insect and said ‘That. That is my name.’ It was a grasshopper! He said they were d-delicious.”

Twilight made a face, sticking out her tongue, drawing a laugh from Dr. Turing.

“As I recall, I joked that I doubted that grasshoppers taste like grasshopper cookies. And he said he didn’t know what I meant by such a thing. Well, I got, ah, permission from the guards on my next visit and I brought him a box of them. You know, the little thin chocolate and mint cookies?”

Twilight’s eyes widened. “No… you don’t mean--”

Dr. Turing laughed. “The lad ate the whole box! Never seen anything like it! And then he…” Dr. Turing paused, and Twilight saw that tears were forming in his eyes. “He cried. It took me quite by surprise; I didn’t even know a changeling could cry until that day. He said he’d never tasted anything so wonderful and he thanked me again and again for bringing them to him.” He cleared his throat, wiping the tears on his sleeve.

“W-well, after that, he became much more sociable. Unfortunately, at that time my work on decrypting the Enigma machine began to take far more of my time. I told him of my troubles and he asked how he could help. I told him that there wasn’t anything he could do unless he could think of a way to get an updated Enigma machine.”

Twilight noticed the knowing smile Dr. Turing wore. “Wait a minute! You mean that machine you showed me at Brindley Park…?”

“Apparently he does a very convincing centaur. His handlers sent him behind enemy lines and the lad came back dutifully, Enigma machine in tow. After that, it seemed he’d earned the Guard’s trust enough to where they considered granting him his freedom. And when he’d finally gained it, he told me that from that day forward, he’d live as a pony and he’d forever be known as--”

“--Choco Mint,” Twilight said, finishing the sentence. She smiled, taking a deep breath, her chest swelling in appreciation. “So it seems Equestria has two unknown heroes!”

Dr. Turing rolled his eyes. “You flatter me again, Your M-majesty,” he said. “Now let’s go meet our friends. I believe Mint intends for us to spend a night on the town.”

***

The next day, Twilight, Turing Test, Gadget, and Dr. Turing were making their way to the platform at Trottingham Station. The sound of trains and ponies rushing all around them filled the air.

Gadget sighed. “It really has been fun, but guess it’s back to work for me.” Then she smiled, perking up at her next thought. “But on the bright side, I might be able to convince Mr. Vanderbull to invest in the ACE project. Plus, I feel like I’ve got a ton of great ideas to start developing! And on top of all that, it’s great that you’re letting us all co-author your next paper, Dr. Turing!”

Talon waved a claw dismissively. “No, I, ah, I wouldn’t hear of writing such a thing without your assistance.”

“Ooh, I’m so excited!” Gadget squealed. “I’m writing a ground-breaking scientific paper with one of Equestria’s greatest scientists, a princess, and a robot!”

“I know, it sounds wonderful!” Twilight exclaimed, lifting off the ground momentarily in her elation.

“And, in fact,” Dr. Turing said, stroking his feathered chin thoughtfully, “I believe I already know what to write about. The Imitation Game failed because it was too limited in scope to appreciate a machine for being intelligent in its own right. But I believe you three have stumbled upon something that may yet serve as a better Turing test, though I’ve yet to fully articulate it.”

Twilight and Gadget both looked to each other, then back to Dr. Turing in confusion. Turing Test, however, stepped forward.

“You mean to say that my capacity for friendship despite my mechanical nature is indicative of my intelligence. Am I correct?”

Dr. Turing nodded. “Quite so. It may not be a complete or formalized assessment, but perhaps it shall give us somewhere to start from.”

Twilight smiled. “That sounds wonderful. I look forward to seeing what you write. And thank you so much for seeing us off, Dr. Turing!”

Dr. Turing gave a short nod. “I’d be an awful host if I didn’t, I should think. Please forgive Mint’s not coming here as well. He’s a bit tired after yesterday, it seems, and he doesn’t do well with crowded places.”

There was a loud call of “All aboard!” from the conductor, and Gadget gave a small cry of panic.

“Oh jeez, I better go!” She started to gallop toward the train, but stopped, looked over her shoulder, and ran back to Twilight and Turing Test, sweeping them both up in her mechanical arms, giving each of them a firm (if somewhat cold and metallic) hug. She then gave a low bow to Dr. Turing.

“Goodbye, Twilight! Goodbye, Turing Test! It was an honor to meet you, Dr. Turing!” Gadget called over her shoulder as she ran for the train. “I’ll write you as soon as I can!”

“Goodbye, Gadget!” Twilight called after her.

“Bon voyage!” Dr. Turing called. Turing Test noticed their waving and began to wave as well.

“Please extend our positive feelings of affection and gratitude to Mr. Vanderbull for helping to arrange this encounter as well as for granting you leave to accompany us and oh you are already on the train.”

Twilight smacked her own forehead. “A simple ‘So long!’ will be fine next time, Turing.”

“But I do not want it to be a long time. Perhaps I could say ‘So short,’ instead.”

Twilight groaned, but had to crack a smile. “Well, come on. Let’s go catch our train. This has been a really great trip, but I need to head back to Ponyville and start back on more ‘Princess Work.’”

The two of them looked to Dr. Turing.

“I guess this is goodbye, Talon,” Twilight said.

“For now, Twilight, for now.” He smiled and then turned his attention to Turing Test. “And as for you, Miss Turing…”

Turing Test tilted her head at him, noticing that he appeared to be holding back tears.

“Dr. Turing, are you well?”

“Yes, yes, it’s nothing,” he said, chuckling. “It’s just… you know, I never thought I’d see a being such as you in my lifetime. Regardless of who built you or for what purpose, you truly are a miracle of technological achievement and perhaps the culmination of the type of work I’ve devoted my life to. I j-just, ah, I just… I am honored to know you, to have you carry my name, and to call you a friend. That is, if that is all right with you?”

Turing Test nodded. “Affirmative. I am very happy that I was able to avoid disappointing you or Twilight Sparkle. I also am happy to share my designation with you. I will attempt to always act in a way that will honor you, sir.”

Dr. Turing nodded and gave the robot one last hug and a short, respectful bow to Twilight.

“Then I bid you both a good journey home. I hope it will be an interesting trip!”

“I think so,” Twilight said, giving Turing Test a sly, sideways glance. “For one thing, Turing, maybe on the way home you’d like to tell me how you suddenly learned to lie like you did during the Imitation Game in under an hour?”

Turing suddenly put a hoof to her chest, tossing her head and the coils of her mane back dramatically. “The Great and Powerful Turing Test had an excellent teacher.”

Twilight’s jaw dropped open and a barely audible croak escaped her.

“We should hurry,” Turing Test said, resuming her normal mannerisms as she trotted nonchalantly past Twilight.

Twilight remained frozen in place for another moment before she turned and dashed after the mechanical mare.

Dr. Turing gave a short chuckle. “Yes, quite an interesting trip, by the look of things!”

To be continued...

Author's Notes:

And so the Trottingham Arc closes! Up next, it's time to tackle a certain orange-colored farm pony who has been waiting for her turn in the narrative for quite a while.
"Darn right, ya top hat-wearin' snake in the grass!"

Erm, yes, well... hey look, references!

-The first Interviewer is named Bent Burtt is named after Ben Burtt, the legendary sound designer behind the most iconic sounds in cinema, including those in Star Wars, ET, and Indiana Jones, but he gets special mention here for designing the voice of R2-D2, and doing the sound of WALL-E, including being the actual voice of Wall-E himself!

-Another Interviewer is named Feather River. Bit obscure, but related to the previous reference. Ben Burtt is fond of a particular sound effect called "the Wilhelm scream" which he drops into practically every movie he works on. It is also used extensively in MLP and my illustrator and friend Colby make a game of calling it out when we watch episodes. And the movie the Wilhelm scream originates from? The Charge at Feather River. (Well, actually, it originates from the movie "Distant Drums," but it takes its name from a character in "Feather River.) Thanks for the correction, Skunktrain!)

-That gloomy interviewee that Turing Test loses to? His dialogue is an homage to Marvin the Paranoid Android, the perpetually depressed robot from The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy media. I wanted to include the reference not just for the English and robot connections, but also because in the movie version of Hitchhiker, he was voiced by the late, great Alan Rickman, who passed away during this arc.

-Lastly, when Turing Test comments about the Imitation Game that "The only winning move is not to play," it's a reference to the same line spoken at the end of WarGames, a 1983 movie about a computer that nearly starts a nuclear war. It's a bit dated, but not a bad film. Give it a look if you have a chance!

That's it for now, folks! See you next time!

P.S. If the puzzle from last chapter stumped you (as it did everyone else), you can check the solution here.

Apple Computer, Part 1

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The setting sun bathed the orchard in its soft, warm glow. A crisp autumn breeze blew through the branches of the apple trees, causing the heavy apples weighing down the boughs to sway gently. A few apples fell to the ground, released from their branches by the gentle gust.

Moving through this orchard, a single earth pony wearing a weathered brown hat approached one of the trees. Her breath came in ragged gasps, but she ignored her body’s demands that she stop to rest. Instead, she turned her back to the tree and gave it a powerful buck. The force of her strike shook the tree, commanding it to release its crimson bounty. The apples rained down, dropping into the buckets with a brief, drumming staccato.

Loud as it was, the drumming could only just mask the sound of the mare gasping as pain sliced through her body. Her legs demanded that she stop, buckling under her, but she refused to listen. She stood back up. She was not done yet. She rubbed her hip, tenderly massaging it, even as her breath came in long, shaky drafts.

She should have gone back an hour ago. She knew that. Even so, she had worked late before. Her family was counting on her; they would still be there and they would not think much of her making the most of the day’s light before the night fell. They would greet her with smiles and commend her for her determination.

They would be proud.

She’d done it before. Time and again, she’d done it to get ahead of her personal quota, to do more than was required for the day. But this time… this time she was behind.

She took one last, deep breath and went over to the next tree. “Two more,” she whispered. “Just two more and I’ll head in for the day.”

The tree loomed before her, seeming larger than the last. Yet it held so many apples. Apples that, if not bucked soon, would drop to the ground and begin to rot. They would be wasted, all simply because she had not been there to collect them.

“Like hay I’ll let that happen,” she muttered to herself, narrowing her eyes. She turned away from the tree, looking over her shoulder to make sure she was lined up correctly, and steeled herself as she kicked her hind legs out again.

The apples rained down again, but this time the sound was not loud enough to conceal her cry of pain. Had anypony been around, they would certainly have heard her.

She clenched her teeth and shut her eyes tight, forcing back the tears before they could be shed. That dull ache was gone, and in its place was a sharp, stabbing pain that felt like she’d been skewered through the flanks with a lance.

One more! she told herself. Just one more and then I can stop!

She nodded, as if obeying her own mental command, but her own body was fighting her. She could hardly stand, but Applejack ignored her protesting limbs and pushed forward, forcing herself to walk.

“I ain’t leavin’,” she growled, though it came almost as a groan. She paused for a moment, her barrel heaving, her head throbbing, her vision blurring, her hips practically screaming, as she eyed the next tree. “Not until I’m finished! I… I carry my own weight! Now let’s buck this here tree and go home!”

The sweat was beading on her forehead and pouring off her body. But she ignored the pain, ignored her fatigue, and took aim at the last tree. Her quota would be met, no matter the cost.

She raised her hind legs up one final time and planted them hard against the trunk.

Something popped.

Her eyes went wide. Her voice stuck in her throat as a silent scream took hold. Her legs gave out, and she collapsed the ground as roughly as the apples she was collecting.

She tried to stand. She failed.

With a groan that was more a whimper than anything, she tried again, but once again her legs failed her and she hit the ground, almost as hard as the first time.

“H… h-help…” The feeble sound was barely a whisper. She took a deep breath, mustering her strength and ignoring the awful, hideous pain that set her lower half on fire.

She screamed. Loud and hard, with all her might, she screamed for help. She called names, she begged, she pleaded.

At first, there was nothing, not the sound of hooves galloping to her aid, not the panicked cries of her kin, calling to see if she was alright.

But then it came: the strong, hurried thundering of her brother’s hooves as he barreled down the orchard’s row. She could see him now, as he came into view. He called for her, but it was all muffled. She couldn’t understand his shouts, but she could tell that they were worried.

It was then that the tears came. From the pain at first, yet also from relief, and then from something else; that terrible gnawing fear that had stalked her these last few months. Now, at last, it had finally caught her.

“No,” she whispered, sobbing face down into the grass. “No… no… no…”

***

Twilight briskly moved up the hallway at Ponyville General Hospital the next morning. Spike was right behind her, and the pair of them skidded to a halt when they spotted the room number the receptionist at the front desk had given them.

Twilight knocked lightly on the door and heard small hooves clattering on the other side. The door opened slightly and she saw Apple Bloom peek out.

“Oh, Twilight, yer here,” the little filly said, sighing with relief. She turned her head slightly and saw Spike. “Guess ya found her for me, Spike. Thanks!”

“Sure thing,” Spike said, nodding.

Spike had been walking over to the Quills and Sofas store on his usual errand when he’d encountered Apple Bloom. She was looking for Twilight, but Spike had agreed to deliver her message and get Twilight instead. And that message was simple: “Applejack’s in the hospital!”

Now that Spike had retrieved Twilight and the pair of them had arrived, Apple Bloom’s relief was plain to see, but so were the dark circles under her eyes, and Twilight realized that the girl probably hadn’t slept well the previous night.

“Come on in,” Apple Bloom said, opening the door and beckoning them inside. “Applejack, Twilight an’ Spike are here!”

“That’s a relief,” Applejack said. Her voice was surprisingly clear and when Twilight saw her, she was happy to see that her friend looked surprisingly energetic and alert. Granny Smith, Big Mac, and Dr. Stable were standing next to the hospital bed where Applejack lay.

Applejack was sitting up in bed and she wore a warm smile. Her hat was hung on a coat rack next to the bed and she wore a pale blue-green hospital gown, but she looked, for lack of a better word, normal.

“Wow, Applejack, you look really good for a pony in the hospital!” Spike said, voicing Twilight’s sentiment before she could.

“Yeah,” Twilight agreed. “I was worried you were really hurt, but you look fine!”

“Aw, thanks, Spike. An’ fer the record, Twilight, I am fine!” Applejack said, raising her chin proudly.

“The hay you are!” Granny Smith shouted, glaring at her granddaughter and startling them all with that sudden outburst. “Ya darn near gave me a heart attack an’ ya worried yer brother an’ sister sick, puttin’ yerself in the hospital like that!”

Big Mac merely gave an annoyed grunt in agreement.

“Uh, yeah,” Applejack said, blushing slightly as she rubbed the back of her neck. “I guess I overdid things a little last night.”

“Which, I might add,” Dr. Stable said, raising an eyebrow at her, “is exactly what I told you not to do.”

Twilight blinked. “Um, I’m sorry, but am I missing something?”

Apple Bloom opened her mouth. “Applejack’s got--”

“Apple Bloom, hush!” Applejack snapped.

“Now, you listen here, young missy!” Granny Smith said, stomping one hoof. “Ya done got everypony worried, now yer gonna tell Twilight what’s goin’ on or else one o’ us will do it fer ya!”

“All right, all right!” Applejack said, raising her hooves defensively. “I just… look, can ya give me a moment? I’d like to tell Twilight an’ Spike in private, if ya don’t mind.”

The other three Apples looked to each other, communicating their mutual thoughts in their expressions. At last, they looked to her and Big McIntosh gave a short nod. “Eeyup,” he said.

“Don’t worry, Applejack,” Apple Bloom added. “I’m sure Twilight can help.”

“I… I’m sure she can,” Applejack said quietly, giving her a smile.

“Well, come on then, everypony,” Granny Smith said. Then she took on a sly grin and rubbed her chin as she eyed Dr. Stable. “Uh, say, Doc, can ya help a lady find the pharmacy around here? Might as well get Applejack’s new medicine while we’re steppin’ out.”

“Oh, uh, yes. Certainly,” he said, walking out with the Apples.

“Mmm, tell me, Doc, are you single?”

“Ye-- no!” he said hurriedly, looking helplessly over his shoulder as Granny Smith walked out with him, shoulder-to-shoulder. Apple Bloom and Big Mac just snickered to each other.

“Hoo boy,” Applejack muttered, chuckling as she watched the poor doctor be led away before the group shut the door behind them.

“Okay, Applejack,” Twilight said softly, placing her hoof on Applejack’s, “what’s wrong?”

Applejack heaved a sigh. “Twilight… I’ve got Bucker’s Hips.”

Twilight and Spike blinked in unison, looked at each other, then back to Applejack, staring at her blankly.

“Ugh,” Applejack said, rubbing her forehead. “Right. Y’all both come from Canterlot. Ya didn’t grow up with a lot o’ farmin’ earth ponies around, I guess.”

“Are you kidding?” Spike asked, laughing and thumbing a claw in Twilight’s direction. “Twilight here used to think eggplants actually hatched from eggs when she was a filly!”

Twilight’s cheeks flushed and she glared at Spike. “And you thought gems grew on trees!”

“The point,” Applejack said sharply, cutting off the pair’s argument, “is that you two ain’t ever heard of it. Bucker’s Hips is a thing farm ponies get from buckin’ trees all day. It’s generic.”

Twilight raised an eyebrow. “It’s what?”

“You know, one o’ them things that runs in the family?”

Ah. ‘Genetic,’ Twilight told herself, but settled on not correcting her. “So, what are the symptoms? And does it have a cure or a treatment?”

“Well, it makes yer joints swell up and it hurts like the dickens. As fer a cure, there ain’t one. The Doc gave me some good meds when they hauled me in here last night, though, an’ there are some pills I’ve been takin’, but the problem is that the only way to really keep it under control is to just quit apple buckin’ so much.”

Spike snapped his claws. “I’ve got it!” he exclaimed. “Why don’t you just buck the trees with your front legs!”

Applejack shook her head. “You can shake the trees that way instead of buckin’, but it takes a lot longer. If ya try buckin’ it and miss, though, yer liable to just split yer noggin right open.”

Twilight tapped her chin. “So, wait, you said you need to quit bucking trees ‘so much.’ You mean that you can still do it, but you just need to do it less?” She smiled. “That doesn’t sound so bad!”

She rolled her eyes. “Tch. You sound just like Dr. Stable, Twi.”

She glanced out the window, remembering when she’d first been diagnosed months ago.

“Applejack, you buck trees during bucking season for up to twelve hours a day,” he’d said. “Nopony else in town works that hard, and even most of the apple farmers I know take a long break every so often. You’re pushing your body too hard!”

“But this is what I gotta do to support my family!” she’d shot back. “What am I supposed to do?”

“You don’t have to stop completely. Just buck less trees!” he’d shouted. “Finish earlier or hire more help! Is that really so hard?”

She heaved a sigh. Harder than ya think, doc. She turned back to Twilight. “Look, I’ll just level with ya. The truth is, we didn’t have as good a year as I was hopin’. We had lots o’ expenses dealin’ with one thing after another. I mean, do you know how many times the dang barn’s been destroyed an’ rebuilt this last year?”

Twilight looked up and ran her tongue around her cheek. “Four?” she asked.

“Uh, yeah, actually.” She shook her head. “Look, the point is that if we don’t take in one more good apple harvest before winter hits, we’re gonna have to tighten our belts extra hard come next year. Too many o’ those, an’ things’ll start lookin’ pretty bleak fer Sweet Apple Acres.”

Twilight nodded. “I see. But Applejack, you could have asked us for help. I would have thought that after last time, you’d be okay with asking us--”

“It wasn’t that I didn’t wanna ask,” Applejack said softly. “I mean, it was, but not fer the same reason.” She swallowed, her frown deepening. “Look, there was still time to pull in the crop. I figured if I just met a quota, we’d be okay. But this darn case o’ Bucker’s Hips kept slowin’ me down. An’ this wasn’t even that much! Even less than what I did every day last year!”

Twilight laid her hoof on Applejack’s, and Spike came around the other side of the bed to hold her other hoof.

“Don’t worry, AJ,” Spike said quietly, patting Applejack’s hoof. “We’ll figure this out.”

Twilight nodded, smiling at her. “Spike’s right. Listen, let’s figure out how to finish this harvest, and then you can heal up, recover, and be back to bucking apples next season.”

Applejack’s lip quivered, but she managed a laugh and wiped her eyes. “Ah, pony feathers… yer right, Twilight. I just didn’t want everypony in town to go around pityin’ me. I also didn’t wanna ask y’all two years in a row, but I ain’t too proud to admit when I’m in over my head. Would y’all ask the rest of the gang to come help?”

Twilight bit her lip. “The rest of us? Umm…”

Applejack tilted her head. “What? What is it?”

“See, the thing is…” she began, trailing off.

Spike sighed. “Pinkie’s babysitting the Cake twins all week, Fluttershy is helping Tree Hugger collect some rare mushrooms or something, Rarity’s at the Canterlot Boutique to talk business with Sassy Saddles,” he said, ticking off their friends one by one on his claws, “and Rainbow Dash got a call as a Wonderbolt Reserve to perform in the Annual Reserves Showcase, so she’s off practicing with the other recruits. Oh, and now that I think about it, Twilight has--”

“Spike, that isn’t important!” Twilight exclaimed, waving a hoof dismissively. “Applejack needs our help right now!”

Spike nodded, but Applejack’s gaze turned stony. “Twilight… what was he about to say?”

“Oh, uh… it’s nothing that you need to worry about.”

“Too late. I’m already worryin’.” She leaned closer, raising her eyebrow. “Now what is it?”

“Well,” Twilight said, looking away. “It’s a conference at the Crystal Empire to discuss the influx of new commerce and travel between Equestria and Yakyakistan.”

Applejack’s eyes widened. “That sounds important.”

“No! Well, yes, but--”

“The yaks wanted Twilight there since she’s the one that helped make friends with Prince Rutherford,” Spike explained.

Applejack sighed. “Go to the conference, Twilight.” Then she smiled. “You know them yaks ain’t exactly even-tempered when things don’t go their way, so you best not disappoint ‘em.”

“But Applejack, I could help you!”

“Much as I appreciate the sentiment,” she said, crossing her forehooves, “I can’t ask you to put me an’ the farm before Equestria, especially not after all the work we all did tryin’ to please those yaks.”

Spike stood ramrod straight, as if at attention. “Then at least let me help! As an honorable dragon, I--”

“No, no, that’s mighty nice o’ ya, Spike,” Applejack said quickly, holding out her hoof. “But Twi’s gonna need her number one assistant. An’ - no offense - yer way better at bein’ her assistant than ya are at bein’ a farmhoof. Farmclaw. Whatever ya call it.”

Spike drooped at that, but he couldn’t deny it. “Well, all right. But what are you gonna do instead?”

She sighed. “I dunno, Spike. I guess I’ll just have to hire more workers. It’ll take time and a bite out o’ the profits, but maybe we’ll just make it into the black this year anyhow.”

Twilight shut her eyes, scratching the side of her head. “There’s got to be a way. If only… if only… oh!” Her eyes lit up, but then she froze as Applejack looked at her hopefully.

“What is it, Twi? Did ya come up with some kinda magic solution or something like that?”

Twilight looked away. “Um… not a magical solution so much as a… technological solution.”

Applejack blinked. Then Twilight’s meaning dawned on her and her eyes bulged.

“Oh. Her.”

“Now, Applejack, I know you two haven’t gotten along, b-but you said you’d spend time with her,” Twilight said, speaking frantically, “and she can learn how to apple buck in no time, she won’t get tired, and she can move so fast that I just know she could help you!”

Applejack grinned. “Look, I didn’t say no, Twilight.” She sighed. “I mean, every time I see her, she’s a little more like a pony an’ less like that thing we found in the orchard. I guess she’s learnin’ all kinds o’ things now, right?”

“Oh!” Twilight exclaimed, smiling when she heard Applejack’s receptiveness. “Yes, she has learned lots of things! She’s learned more humor, she can feel affection now, and last week she even learned how to lie!” Twilight froze the instant she said that.

Applejack’s eyes narrowed. “Did she now?”

“I… I can explain…”

Applejack leaned back in bed, putting her forehooves behind her head. “I’m listenin’, sugarcube.”

***

Applejack tossed and turned in bed. She’d been released from the hospital and her family had walked her home earlier that afternoon. Apple Bloom had rushed on ahead and kicked every single minor obstruction out of the road, lest Applejack trip over it, and warned her about every slight change in elevation or root growing in the way.

“Applejack, look out!” Apple Bloom screamed, pushing Applejack out of the way to throw her own body over some unseen danger.

“What? What is it?!” she’d shouted back.

“I just stopped ya from slippin’ on this!” Apple Bloom declared. She’d held up a dry, brown leaf in her hoof.

“Apple Bloom, that’s a dead leaf,” she’d said.

“More like a deadly leaf!” Apple Bloom replied, crushing the offending leaf to powder between her hooves.

Applejack grunted, punching her pillow at the memory. The very idea of Apple Bloom treating her with more care and concern than Granny Smith while walking her home of all things was ridiculous.

Nonetheless, she plopped down on the pillow, pulling the bedsheets around her tightly as she shut her eyes. Slowly, bit by bit, she let her anxiety leave her and felt sleep begin to overtake her.

Knock-knock-knock.

Her eyes popped open. The hay was that? she asked herself. Did she imagine it?

Knock-knock-knock.

She went to her bedroom door. She opened it, but there was nothing but the dark and empty hallway.

Knock-knock-knock.

Applejack knew she wasn’t imagining it. The rhythmic knocking was coming at regular intervals and she followed the sound downstairs and right to her front door. She opened it to see a pair of glowing violet eyes staring right back at her.

“Uwah!” she shouted.

“Good morning, Applejack,” Turing Test said. “I am here to assist you as you requested.”

Applejack clutched her chest. “Good gravy, ya scared the living daylights outta me!”

“I do not detect any luminescence leaving your body, living or otherwise, Applejack, but I apologize for frightening you.”

“That ain’t-- what the hay are you doing here?!”

“I am the hay here to assist you with your harvest.”

“What? Do you have any idea what time it is?!” Applejack shouted.

“It is 12:01 am. Wait… now it is 12:02 am. I can switch to maritime designations if you prefer.”

Applejack blinked. “It’s the middle of the night. Why. Are. You. Here. Now?” she said slowly through her gritted teeth.

“You. Told. Twilight. Sparkle. That--”

“Stop talkin’ like that!”

“I apologize. I thought you wanted to.” She bowed her head slightly before continuing. “You told Twilight Sparkle to inform me that I was to begin my task ‘first thing tomorrow.’ I arrived in time to knock on your door at midnight. It was the first thing I did today, fulfilling your request.”

Applejack blinked. “Are you pullin’ my leg?”

Turing’s ears twitched, and she looked down at Applejacks’ leg. “I am not. If you believe I am, then perhaps you are still under the influence of your medica--”

“Go home and come back tomor-- no, no, I mean… come back today at… I dunno, 7:30?”

Turing Test nodded, her neck whirring as she did so. “Understood. I will be here at that time. I apologize for any confusion.”

“Yeah, yeah, just… ugh, don’t be late, all right?”

“Acknowledged.”

“I guess that’s Fancy fer ‘Yes,’ so see ya then.” Applejack shut the door in Turing Test’s face and trudged back through the house.

Big Mac and Apple Bloom had both poked their heads out of their rooms and were peeking down the hallway.

“Applejack, what was all that shoutin’ about?” Apple Bloom asked. “You were so loud, ya almost woke up Granny Smith!”

“Eeyup!” Big Mac said, jerking his head at Granny’s door (behind which there came the long, steady sound of snoring).

“Nothin’ y’all need to worry about,” Applejack grumbled before yawning.

“Oh!” Apple Bloom said, rushing to her sister’s side. “Are ya sure ya don’t need anything? Maybe ya shouldn’t be outta bed!”

“I’m fine, I’m fine!” Applejack snapped, whirling on the little filly. “Just leave me alone and go back to sleep!”

She stomped into her room and shut the door before jumping back into bed.

This has gotta be the dumbest idea I’ve ever agreed to, she told herself, throwing the covers back over herself. That dang robot… workin’ the farm? More trouble than it’s worth!

***

Apple Bloom was the last to get to the breakfast table. She was allowed to sleep in a little later while Granny cooked breakfast and her siblings fed the animals and collected the eggs and milk. The little filly trotted up to the table where her family was already seated and licked her lips at the sight of the bowl of grits along with a plate of eggs and some steamed vegetables.

“This looks great, Granny!” Apple Bloom exclaimed, digging in.

“Oh, it ain’t nothin’ special, but yer welcome anyway, dear,” Granny Smith replied, giving her a smile.

“I just wish ya hadn’t used these here vegetables,” Applejack muttered. “I mean, they’re great, but maybe just some simple hay woulda done the trick.”

“Oh hush now, ya gotta keep yer strength up, Applejack,” Granny Smith said, putting another helping in front of her.

Applejack sighed, but dug in anyway. There was no point in not eating it now that it had already been cooked, after all. “Thanks Granny,” she managed to say between bites. Then she glanced up at the clock. In just a few minutes, it would be 7:30.

“Now, before we get the day started, do y’all remember what I told ya about the help we’re gettin’ today?” Applejack asked, tapping on the table to get her family’s attention.

“Eeyup!” Big Mac replied.

“Sure do!” Apple Bloom said before taking a huge bite of grits.

“Yes indeedy!” Granny Smith added. “An’ I can’t wait to meet this Robert feller ya hired.”

The three younger Apples all stifled their chuckles.

“No, Granny,” Applejack said, rolling her eyes, “it ain’t nopony named ‘Robert.’ I said it’s a she, an’ her name is Turing Test. An’ I said she’s a ‘robot,’ not ‘Robert.’”

“You gone crazy? Why’d you hire a rowboat?!”

“No, she’s a robot!”

“What the hay’s a robot?”

Applejack groaned, burying her face in her hooves. “Like I was sayin’ yesterday, she’s--”

Knock-knock-knock.

“--here, apparently.” She sighed and got up from the table to go to the door. The rest of the family followed her.

Now just be nice, Applejack told herself. She’s here to help, after all, an’ she ain’t a bad pony. She saved four o’ yer friends from those two crazy ponies back on Nightmare Night, an’ everypony else seems to like her well enough. So don’t look a robot in the mouth an’ show some manners.

She took a deep breath and opened the door, putting on her best smile.

“Mornin’, Turing Test!” Applejack said.

“Good morning, Applejack,” Turing Test said, bowing slightly. “I timed my arrival to occur at 7:30. However, that time is synchronized to Twilight Sparkle’s clock which is in turn synchronized to the Ponyville Clocktower. If you wished for me to arrive at your own clock’s time, then perhaps I should wait outside or apologize for arriving late.”

“No, no, yer fine,” Applejack said, keeping her smile in place. “Come on in an’ meet the family. Though I guess ya already know Apple Bloom.”

“Correct,” Turing Test said, stepping inside the house. “In fact, I am told that you were the one that suggested taking me to the hospital,” she said to Apple Bloom. “That act may have resulted in me being repaired and taken in by Twilight Sparkle. I am indebted to you and the rest of your family.”

Apple Bloom beamed, but was interrupted by Granny Smith’s loud gasp.

“Ohhh!” Granny Smith said. “So you’re the pony they found in the orchard! Well, ya look dang good! Even got yer armor back on, not that ya need it fer apple buckin’.”

Applejack opened her mouth, but Apple Bloom beat her too it.

“It ain’t armor, Granny,” the little filly said, leaping to Turing’s side. “She’s made outta the stuff! She ain’t any ordinary ol’ pony; she’s a machine pony!”

“She is? Well dang it, why didn’t anypony tell me that!” Granny Smith shouted.

The other three gave another collective eyeroll.

“Aaaanyway, that there’s Granny Smith,” Applejack went on, “an’ this here’s my older brother Big McIntosh. Just Big Mac, fer short.”

“It is very nice to meet you,” Turing said, looking from Granny Smith to Big Mac in turn. “Twilight Sparkle informed me about you as well. Granny Smith, you were instrumental in contributing to the founding of Ponyville.”

“Well, good t’ hear that Twilight is keepin’ ya up on yer history!” Granny Smith said, lifting her chin proudly. “Lemme know if’n ya ever wanna know more about the good ol’ days.”

“Acknowledged,” Turing said, and then turned to Big Mac. “Twilight has also informed me of your strength and dependability. Also, that you have a pleasing singing voice.”

The tall stallion before her actually blushed and looked away slightly. “Heh heh… Eeyup.”

“All right now, everypony, we best get to work. We already lost a day an’ we only got five more ‘til our deadline fer harvest. Apple Bloom, ya best finish breakfast an’ then get t’ school. Big Mac, I’ll see ya in the orchard in a few. Granny, ya best get back t’ managin’ the family budget fer this month. Everypony ready?”

“Ready!” they all shouted in unison.

Applejack turned to Turing Test. “Uh, I’ll be right out, okay?”

“Acknowledged. I will wait by your barn.” She turned to leave as the Apple family waved to her.

Applejack watched and waited until Turing Test was a good distance from the door and then shut it, turning back to her family. “Ok, y’all, now I know she seems kinda strange…”

“She’s not so strange, Applejack!” Apple Bloom said, hopping forward enthusiastically. “She’s funny! An’ she’s real nice fer comin’ here to help! Can me and the other Crusaders come talk to her after school?”

“I… well, we’ll see,” Applejack said slowly, frowning at Apple Bloom’s nonplussed reaction.

“She seems nice enough to me,” Granny Smith said, turning to go back to the kitchen. “Shame though… nice mare like her bein’ named Robert. She’ll have a hard time snaggin’ a stallion with a name like that!”

Applejack’s eye twitched as she watched her go.

“I’m… I’m just gonna go out to the field now, Big Mac. See ya in a bit?”

“Eeyup!” Big Mac said, giving her a nod.

***

Applejack trotted out and found Turing Test standing in front of the barn doors, almost like a sentry that was guarding it.

“Thanks fer waitin’,” Applejack said, giving her a quick nod. “So, ya ready to go get some apples?”

“I am.” Turing Test said.

Applejack smiled and walked to the barn doors, opening them and leading Turing inside. “All right then. Let’s get a couple carts and load ‘em up with some buckets. We’ll need to go place ‘em under the trees to collect the apples when they fall.”

“Understood.” Turing Test entered the barn, noting the dim light and the straw that was strewn all around it. Farming equipment of all kinds was hung on the walls and large bales of hay were stacked in the loft. “How interesting,” she remarked.

“What’s that?” Applejack asked, looking over her shoulder.

“My apologies. This is the first time I have been in a place like this. It is very different from Twilight Sparkle’s residence.”

“Heh,” Applejack chuckled, smirking slightly. “Yeah, it ain’t no castle, that’s fer sure.”

“That is true, but I still find this an interesting place. I anticipate that I will gain a large amount of input from this experience.” She followed Applejack’s lead and began to load stacks of buckets into a nearby wooden cart. She paused, glancing over at Applejack, who likewise stopped and furrowed her brow at the sudden attention.

“Uh, ya need somethin’?” Applejack asked.

“It is not that I require anything,” Turing Test said, “but perhaps I should, as they say, ‘clear the air.’”

Applejack set down the bucket she held and nodded to her. “Okay… what about?”

“Twilight Sparkle has briefed me on many things. I am also aware that you have previously mistrusted me. I do not fault you for that. It is only natural to be protective of your friends.”

Applejack nodded. “All right, then.”

“Furthermore,” Turing continued, “Twilight Sparkle informed me that you were now aware of me recently gaining the ability to lie. She was apprehensive of you having a negative reaction, but I assure you--”

Applejack held up a hoof and shook her head. “Actually, there ain’t no need to worry about that,” she said. “At first, I admit I thought it was just askin’ fer trouble. But the way she talked about what happened over in Trottingham, I kinda came around on it. Now, I ain’t got no patience for liars and tricksters, but there’s a difference between tellin’ the truth only ‘cause ya got no choice an’ tellin’ the truth when a lie would be a heck of a lot easier. I figure the fact that ya chose to tell the truth rather than keep lyin’ just to beat that goofy test they gave ya says a lot about yer character.”

Turing Test placed her hoof on her chest. “I am very happy to hear that, Applejack. It is my hope that we will become friends through this experience.”

“Well, I guess we’ll find out, won’t we?” Applejack said, giving her a grin. “Now that’s enough yammerin’. Let’s load up these carts an’ get ‘em out to the field!”

The two harnessed themselves to their respective carts and Applejack led Turing Test out to the field where row upon row of apple trees awaited them.

“Now, just watch me,” Applejack said, parking the cart by the side of the dirt road that went to the field. “We’re gonna put these buckets out under the trees. Try to get ‘em under the biggest, heaviest lookin’ branches so they can catch the apples when they fall.”

Turing Test nodded and they began to place the buckets.

“Now, how are ya plannin’ to pick the apples?” Applejack asked.

“What method do you find most optimal, Applejack?” Turing Test asked.

“Well, I just buck the trees. Give ‘em a good kick and the apples fall right off. But then again,” she said frowning, looking over Turing Test, “that’s more of an ‘earth pony’ thing. Maybe you should just try shakin’ the trees or usin’ yer magic.”

But Turing Test shook her head at that. “My magic abilities are still far more limited than Twilight Sparkle’s. I am unable to levitate so many objects with sufficient accuracy. Is kicking the trees the most efficient way to harvest?”

“Well, yeah,” Applejack said slowly, her frown deepening. “But there’s a technique to it. Kick it too softly, an’ the trees won’t drop enough an’ you’ll just have to try again. Too hard, like Big Mac did that one time after the other foals at school teased ‘im fer bein’ tall, an’ ya just might damage the tree.” She took a step over to Turing Test and narrowed her eyes. “An’ believe me… I won’t be happy if ya hurt my trees.”

Turing Test nodded. “Perhaps I would benefit from a demonstration?” she said, raising an upturned hoof to Applejack.

“Sure thing, but I gotta warn ya… it takes years to buck like a farm pony like me!” she said, tipping hat with a smug grin.

Turing Test said nothing as Applejack strolled over to the nearest tree. She turned away from it, lined up, and aimed her back hooves at it, giving it a powerful kick. The sound of her hooves slamming into the trunk reverberating throughout the orchard in the calm, crisp morning air, and the apples rained down into the buckets.

Not a single apple was left on the trees, and not a single apple missed the buckets below.

“A very efficient technique, Applejack. However, I require slightly more data.”

Applejack beamed. “Well, I don’t know if I can spend all day teachin’ ya,” she said. “Besides, like I said, it takes years to get it right!”

“I have analyzed your technique, but I believe there is an additional component to it. One moment, please… engaging E-Mode.”

Applejack gave a start as the pistons in Turing’s legs engaged.

“Hold on, now!” she cried, holding up a hoof. “What are ya doin’ that for?”

“In addition to augmenting my physical strength, E-Mode enables me to read expanded biometric data. If you will buck one more tree, then I may be able to extrapolate from additional data.”

Applejack blinked. “I, uh… I don’t really get it, but if it’ll make ya happy, I guess I can oblige.”

She went to the next tree and gave it another solid bucking. Again the apples rained down perfectly into the buckets.

“Analyzing… data has been assimilated. I will now attempt to imitate your technique.”

Applejack watched as Turing Test went to the first tree in her row and, mimicking Applejack’s stance, lined up and gave it a quick buck. Applejack tensed up, worried that the powerful robot’s legs would smash the tree to splinters, but instead there was the same solid sound she’d heard thousands of times before, followed by the sound of apples raining down into the buckets below.

The branches were now bare. Just like her, she’d managed to get every single apple without missing a single one.

“Apples acquired,” Turing intoned. “Now proceeding with harvest.” She paused, glancing over at Applejack. “Thank you for the demonstration. It was very helpful.”

Applejack’s jaw dropped open. To buck a tree for the very first time and do it so perfectly, as perfectly as she could… she’d never seen anything like it!

Raising herself up, she galloped to her next tree and bucked it as well, letting the apples fall.

Immediately after, though, Turing had hit her next tree and was already bucking the next. Applejack wasted no time and went further down her row, as if this had suddenly become a good old-fashioned bucking competition.

The two mares went to work, bucking and collecting apples. Applejack filled all her buckets and began to load them back into her cart. Turing Test was doing the same. Once loaded up, the pair began to haul the loaded carts back towards the barn to load them up into crates. Applejack was already starting to sweat as she strained and pulled the cart onto the dirt road, but suddenly Turing and her cart burst into view, blocking her path for a mere moment before she dashed back down the road, kicking up a large cloud of dust.

Applejack coughed and waved the dust away. When it cleared, she saw that Turing Test was already halfway back to the barn.

She’s fast! Applejack said to herself. Then she grit her teeth and tore off down the road. No greenhorn was going to show her up on the very first day!

***

A half hour later, Applejack had completed several rows of trees and was still going strong. But keeping up with Turing Test’s pace, she realized, was easier said than done. It took her utmost concentration to aim, buck, and move on to the next tree as fast as she could. Even so, she could hear the rhythmic whirring of Turing Test’s legs and the rapid-fire sound of her kicking each tree. She wasn’t sure how well the robot was doing compared to her or vice-versa, but she felt like she was keeping up pretty well. She smiled at that thought before rearing up to buck the next tree.

“Applejack?”

She gave a startled cry and halted in mid-buck, losing her balance and falling over. With a frown, she looked up to see Big Mac standing over her.

“Oh, there ya are,” she said, getting to her hooves. “Nice o’ ya to join us,” she grumbled.

“Ya passed me on the path over here,” he said, rolling his eyes. “I waved to ya. Didn’t even say hello.”

She looked away. “Too busy, I guess.”

“Eeyup,” he said, giving her a certain look.

“Oh, what? Gonna tell me I’m pushin’ myself too far?”

“Eeyup.”

She waved him off. “Relax. The doctor said I’m good to buck apples today.”

“Doctor also said to pace yerself,” Big Mac said, walking alongside her. “It ain’t even nine o’clock an’ yer sweatin’ like you’ve been out here all day.”

“Oh hush, I’m fine,” Applejack said. She picked up her pace and quickly made for the next tree, ready to buck it. Right when she kicked at it, her brother was there, catching her back legs with his forehooves.

“What the heck are you doin’, Big Mac!” she shouted, whirling on him, getting right in his face. “You know how important this harvest is! An’ I’m just tryin’ to pull my own load! Can’t let our new volunteer get too far ahead and think we’re slackin’ off, can we?”

Big Mac sighed. “Don’t think she’s worryin’ about it,” he said. “An’ neither should you.”

“I wouldn’t if you hadn’t stopped me!” she shouted. “She’s probably gettin’ ahead o’ me by now with you holdin’ me up!”

“Applejack,” Big Mac said, heaving a sigh, “it wouldn’t matter. She’s already an entire row ahead of you.”

Applejack’s eyes went wide and she staggered back. “N-no! She can’t be that much faster’n me! Not with my own technique!”

“Uh, actually, she ain’t usin’ yer technique,” he said, jerking his head in the direction of where Turing Test was harvesting a few rows over. Applejack followed him through the trees and saw that the mechanical mare was moving nimbly through the trees, far faster than she’d realized.

Not only that, but Turing Test was now quickly stopping at each tree and kicking it with just one leg, much in the same way that Big Mac did.

“T-Turing Test?!” Applejack gasped.

The robot stopped and turned to see the two siblings watching her. “Hello, Applejack. Hello, Big McIntosh. I have improved my efficiency by 29% on average. Also, after observing Big McIntosh’s technique, I concluded that it was a more efficient use of my power and would drain my battery much more gradually than your technique. Is this satisfactory?”

“Eeyup!” Big Mac replied.

Applejack was still gawking at her. “You… you can buck that much faster?”

“Affirmative. However, you could also increase your own efficiency by decreasing the angle of your bucking by 3 degrees. Currently, it is slightly inefficient.”

Applejack just stared back at her for a moment, blinking once or twice before closing her mouth and swallowing hard. “I see. Well… you… I mean, I best let you get back to work, then,” she said quietly. “Um… keep up the good work,” she added, and turned to leave.

Big Mac and Turing Test watched her go.

“Was my comment inappropriate, Big McIntosh?” Turing asked once Applejack had left them. “It was intended to be helpful.”

Big Mac frowned, mulling that over. “Mmm… nope,” he said at last. But then he added, “But I wouldn’t go sayin’ more stuff like that if I were you. Just focus on what yer doin’ an’ let everypony else mind their own business.”

Turing Test nodded. “Acknowledged. Thank you, Big Mac. I will be more cautious with my feedback.”

The stallion nodded to her and then went back to the row of trees where Applejack was working. Only now, she was bucking at her normal pace, rather than the frantic, grueling pace she’d been attempting earlier. He noted the way she carried herself, though, and something was off about it.

“You okay, Sis?” he asked.

She gave a short nod. “Eeyup,” she quipped, smirking at him.

“Ya know she’s only tryin’ to help, right?” he asked.

She nodded again, going to the next tree. “Eeyup,” she replied, and this time it was with the barest edge to her voice.

“All right, then,” he said, though he kept his eye on her as he walked off. “I’m goin’ back to my row.”

She nodded once more.

He paused. Applejack being that tight-lipped meant that something was wrong, and he knew his sister well enough to see that and to guess what was bothering her.

“Look, Applejack,” he said, “it ain’t about who can buck the most apples. And it ain’t about replacin’ you with a fancy new robot farmhoof either. It’s just about gettin’ the harvest in on time and doin’ what we gotta do fer the farm an’ the family. You know that, right?”

Applejack paused, but heaved a sigh and finally gave a more genuine smile. “Right.” She took a breath. “Yeah. Sorry, I guess I’m just still a little off kilter after, well…” she glanced down at her own hip, “...you know.”

He smiled. “Eeyup.”

“You get back to work now, all right? And I’ll do the same.” She watched him go, her smile still in place right until she heard the sound of Turing Test galloping off with yet another cart loaded up with apples.

It’s for the farm, she told herself. It’s like Big Mac said - it ain’t about me. Just grin an’ bear it, Applejack. Just grin an’ bear it…

***

In the early evening, Big Mac and Turing Test brought in their last haul of apples. They saw that Applejack and Granny Smith were already waiting for them.

“You two both done fer the day?” Granny Smith asked.

“Eeyup!” Big Mac replied.

“Affirmative.” Turing Test turned to look at Applejack. “Through our combined efforts, we were able to harvest approximately 55% of the total number of trees from the field.”

“Probably woulda done even more,” Applejack said, giving a roll of her eyes, “if Granny hadn’t made me stop a couple hours ago.”

“You heard what that nice Dr. Stable said, Applejack,” Granny Smith said, glaring at her. “No more’n six hours until ya recover all the way.”

“My hips didn’t even hurt!” she shot back.

“Kinda the idea,” the older mare grumbled. “After all, the idea is to stop before ya hurt yerself.”

“Right, right,” Applejack sighed. “I just can’t wait until next season rolls around an’ I can get in a full day’s work instead of loungin’ around the house like a bump on a log. But regardless,” she added, giving Turing Test a smile, “thank ya kindly fer all yer help, Turing. Looks like we just might finish ahead o’ schedule. If we do, we might be able to start sellin’ the apples earlier, maybe even make an early batch o’ cider!”

Turing’s ears shifted. “Understood. And you are welcome.” She bowed politely to the three gathered Apples. “If my assistance is no longer required, I will return to Twilight Sparkle’s residence.”

“Wait a minute there, missy,” Granny Smith said, holding up a hoof. “Ain’t Twilight doin’ that thing up there in the Crystal Empire right now?”

“Correct. Currently, the castle is empty. I intended to practice my magic or merely conserve my power by entering sleep mode until tomorrow.”

“Well that just ain’t right, bein’ left all by yer lonesome,” she said, stroking her chin. “Say, why don’t ya just spend the night over here with us?”

Turing Test’s ears stood straight up and both Applejack and Big Mac turned to stare at her.

“You wish to invite me into your home?” Turing Test asked. “I have never received such a request. Is that truly acceptable?” At this, she looked from one Apple sibling to the other.

Big Mac nodded emphatically. “Eeyup!”

Applejack tapped her chin. “Well, it is the neighborly thing to do, what with you helpin’ us out an’ all,” she said slowly. “So… yeah, I guess that’d be fine!”

“Then it’s settled!” Granny Smith exclaimed, a warm smile crossing her aged face. “Looks like we’re havin’ ya fer dinner!”

Turing Test took a few steps back. “I would not advise that. I am neither edible, nor willing to go to such lengths to gain your favor.”

Big Mac broke out into loud guffaws.

“She means,” Applejack said, her smile becoming stiffer and more forced, “that we’re invitin’ ya to have dinner with us.”

“I see,” Turing Test said, halting her retreat. “I will gladly attend. However, please do not prepare any food for me, as I do not eat.”

“Oh, pshaw!” Granny Smith said, turning to go back into the house. “Ya say that now, but you ain’t ever had some good ol’ fashioned Apple family cookin’!”

The other three watched her go.

“I will return to Twilight Sparkle’s castle to retrieve my charging device. If I am to resume work tomorrow, a fully charged battery would be optimal. I will return shortly.”

Big Mac and Applejack waved to her as she left, heading back through the trees of the orchard and up the road to Ponyville, the glow of sunset still reflecting brightly off her metallic exterior.

“She sure is a nice little robot,” Big Mac said. Then he placed his large foreleg around Applejack, startling her. “An’ I’m proud o’ you, Applejack.”

“Huh? What the hay for?” she asked, squirming out of the sudden hug.

“I know she gets on yer nerves a bit,” her brother replied, “but yer bein’ a good sport about it.”

“Oh, ya mean because I didn’t try to fight her comin’ over here for the night or for gettin’ sore about her buckin’ more apples’n me?” she asked.

“Eeyup,” he replied.

She laughed and waved him off. “It ain’t a big deal. She’s lendin’ us a hoof, after all, so why would I be upset? Ain’t no reason to be upset, now is there?”

“Nope!” he replied, and turned to go back in the house. “Ya comin’?”

“I’ll, um… I’ll just be a bit,” she said, glancing in the direction of the field they’d been harvesting. “Just give me a few, alright?”

He shrugged, then went inside the house.

Applejack began to walk toward the field. It wasn’t too far, just down the path and over a small hill. She stood on the hill and looked down at all the trees.

A little more than half of them were now free of the ripe, juicy apples that had burdened their branches that morning. And so few, she realized, were that way because of her.

A cold autumn wind blew past her, letting her braided mane and tail wave in the wind as she held her hat in place.

Not since I was a filly have I been out-bucked so badly. I know she’s helpin’ us out, an’ I know that I gotta be nice, an’ I can’t just go tell her off even though she rubs me the wrong way. That ain’t her fault. I’m the one with the problem. She glanced back at her hip. That’s right… I’m the one with the problem. An’ right now, I need to do what’s best fer the farm an’ the family. How I feel personally ain't...

She took a deep breath, biting her lip. She felt her eyes start to tear up, but she held her breath and stayed strong.

“Strong.” She whispered the word, bringing herself up, standing firm against the wind. That’s what I am. That’s what I gotta be! Fer the farm an’ the family, she repeated to herself, turning back toward home. How I feel just ain’t important…

To be continued…

Author's Notes:

And so begins the Applejack Arc. It's been a while in coming, but I hope it'll be worth the wait!

First off, thanks to my editors and an extra big thank you to GenerousGypsy, who really helped give the first scene in this chapter an overhaul and made it flow a lot better.

Next, of course, we've got references. Not too many this time around, but...

-The title, of course, refers to the company Apple, which I'm sure everyone got. But on that note, many of you might have noticed that I spell Big Mac's name as "McIntosh," not "Macintosh." My reasoning on this is simple... "Macintosh" is a computer, but the type of actual apple he's named after is "McIntosh." And if it's good enough for Lauren Faust and M.A. Larson, then it's good enough for me!

-Something of an old gag, but Turing's use of the phrase "the hay" in her answers is a slight reference to a similar gag used by Spock in Star Trek IV: The Journey Home.

See y'all next time, ya hear?

Apple Computer, Part 2

View Online

Applejack returned to the farmhouse, letting the screen door shut behind her. Apple Bloom was on the floor of the living room, reading a textbook (most likely for her homework, Applejack figured) while Big Mac stretched out on the sofa, taking a breather after a hard day’s work. She heard the bubbling of water and took a whiff of the mouth-watering scent that emanated from the kitchen.

“Smells dang good, Granny!” Applejack called, poking her head into the kitchen.

“It should be!” Granny called back, stirring a pot of soup that was simmering on the stove.

Applejack smiled. A good meal might be just the thing to lift her spirits.

Knock-knock-knock.

“I’ll get it!” Apple Bloom hollered.

Applejack’s grin faltered for a moment, but she kept it in place.

Be nice. She’s your guest. She helped out all day and didn’t even ask fer a single bit. You were raised to be hospitable! Applejack nodded, resolving to take her own advice, and turned back into the living room.

Turing Test stepped into the living room. “Good evening, Applejack and Apple Bloom and Big McIntosh,” she said. “Thank you for inviting me to your home.”

“Aw, it wasn’t nothin’!” Apple Bloom quipped, waving a hoof dismissively.

“Eeyup!” Big Mac said, getting up from the sofa to greet his guest more politely.

“Well, it’s only right after ya helped out, an’ all,” Applejack added.

Turing bowed her head slightly, then turned to Apple Bloom. “You said that your invitation ‘was not nothing.’ I believe your meaning was that it was no great expenditure of effort?”

Apple Bloom blinked. “Uh… I guess?”

“I apologize. You and your family use many double negatives. I am not used to them.”

Applejack raised an eyebrow. “You ain’t makin’ fun of the way we talk, are ya?” she asked, her voice turning cold.

“No. I am merely attempting to understand. Your vernacular provides a unique puzzle that I enjoy decoding.” She looked down and saw the way Apple Bloom was still peering up at her in confusion. “What I mean is that I like the way you talk.”

“Oh!” Apple Bloom said, perking up. “Well, I kinda like the way you talk too! It sure ain’t like anypony else I know!”

“Is that so? Many ponies react negatively to my voice.” The mechanical mare’s ears raised. “Thank you for the compliment, Apple Bloom.”

Big Mac chuckled while Applejack just shook her head. Then she noticed something: Turing Test had no luggage, despite saying that she would bring her personal generator.

“Uh, where’s that generator o’ yours, by the way?” she asked.

“I left it in the barn.”

The three Apple siblings exchanged a mutual look of confusion.

“Why?” Applejack asked.

“I assumed I would be residing there for the night.”

“What?!” Apple Bloom cried, her head jerking straight up. “You ain’t no piece o’ farm equipment, Turing, you’re our guest! And ain’t no guest o’ our family’s gonna sleep in no barn!” With that, the little filly galloped out the front door. “I’ll go get it for ya, Turing!”

Turing Test stared after her and then turned to Big Mac and Applejack. “You intend for me to stay in your house?”

Big Mac chuckled. “Eeyup!” he replied. “Apple Bloom is right. You can sleep in the guest room.”

Applejack felt like rolling her eyes again, but even she had to crack a smile when Turing Test put a hoof to her chest. “That is so kind of you. I have never been invited into another pony’s home in this manner. Thank you very much.”

Big Mac put his hoof on the robot’s shoulder. “Yer welcome, Miss Turing.”

“Shucks, we’re just doin’ what’s right,” Applejack added, tipping her hat. “Just, uh… try not to break the bed. I know how heavy you are.”

Turing Test nodded. “I will not break your bed. I will not need it, as I do not need to lie down to enter sleep mode. However, the gesture is still appreciated.”

Just then, there came the sound of a little filly grunting and something being dragged across dirt.

“Oh for pony’s sake, looks like that generator’s a mite too big fer that gal,” Applejack grumbled, trotting out the door. “Go ahead an’ make yerself comfortable. I’ll get yer luggage fer ya.”

Turing started to follow her. “Perhaps I should retrieve it while you rest, Applejack.”

Applejack froze in place and turned back to stare at her. “I’ve ‘rested’ enough fer today. I think I can handle luggin’ one little ol’ generator up some stairs, Missy.”

Turing Test halted and nodded. “As you wish. Thank you for your help.”

“Hm,” Applejack sniffed, and dashed out the door to help Apple Bloom.

***

A few minutes later, Granny Smith called the rest of the family in for dinner.

Turing stood by while the rest of the Apples took their seats around the simple wooden table. She glanced at her own seat, poking it gently with her hoof.

“Problem, Turing?” Apple Bloom asked.

“I am uncertain that this chair will support my weight.”

“Oh, pshaw!” Granny Smith said, bringing the pot of soup to the table. “Big Mac made these chairs himself! If it can support a tall drink o’ water like him, I expect that it can accommodate anypony!”

Big Mac thrust out his chin proudly. “Eey--”

The chair creaked and groaned as Turing slowly rested her weight on it.

“--m-maybe,” Big Mac finished, watching the robot take a seat next to him.

They all held their breath as she finally sat down completely, only daring to breathe once the chair miraculously managed to not break.

“Sitting sequence complete.”

“Well, now that that’s over,” Granny Smith said, taking her own seat, “everypony dig in!”

The meal consisted of rolls, mashed potatoes and gravy, steamed broccoli, and a hearty bowl of vegetable soup. In seconds, the family had filled their plates and bowls, leaving only Turing’s place empty.

“Don’t be shy now, Young Missy,” Granny Smith said, gesturing to Turing’s empty plate. “You better eat up ‘fore these young uns polish it all off!”

Applejack smacked her forehead. “Granny, fer the last time--!”

Turing held up a hoof. “It is all right, Applejack. I will explain.” She turned to Granny Smith. “It is not that I am not hungry or that the food does not appear appetizing, Granny Smith. I am physically incapable of eating anything. I have no mouth, esophagus, stomach, or digestive organs of any kind.”

“That right?” Granny Smith said, rubbing her chin. “Well, on the upside, more pie fer the rest of us for dessert!”

Turing’s ears shot up and she glanced over at the kitchen counter. “Pie?” Her gaze fixated on the towering apple pie as it cooled, steam rising through the hole made in the center of its cinnamon-sprinkled crust.

“Uh, everything all right over there?” Applejack asked.

“Affirmative,” she replied, though her gaze stayed focused on the pie. “It is just that I once tasted a slice of apple pie by means of Discord’s magic.”

Granny Smith’s eyes widened. “So that’s what happened to that slice o’ pie that went missin’!”

“I told y’all I didn’t eat it!” Apple Bloom shouted, pounding her hooves on the table.

“Well, my mistake,” Granny Smith said. “Have an extra slice tonight then, sugarcube.”

Turing was still staring at the pie. “I remember the taste. It was a sensation unlike any I had experienced. It is at times like these that I wish I was organic.”

“Well, it’d be kinda lousy not to be able to enjoy pie,” Apple Bloom said, stuffing her face with a spoonful of mashed potatoes, “but on the bright side, you gotta be one o’ the fastest, strongest ponies around! You worked an entire day in the orchard and you ain’t even tired! I sure wish I never got tired after a hard day’s work!”

Applejack gave her little sister a sideways glance as she took a bite of her own dinner roll.

“So, Miss Turing,” Granny Smith said, ladeling more vegetable soup into her bowl, “what kinda hobbies do ya have?”

“I do not have any hobbies. My primary directive is to make friends, and I also assist Twilight Sparkle and Spike the Dragon with various duties, but I have no hobbies of my own.”

“Ooh, ooh, wait a minute!” Apple Bloom said, raising a hoof. “I heard from Scootaloo that you were learnin’ about humor from Pinkie Pie!”

Turing tapped her chin. “In a manner of speaking, I suppose that I do have some talent with humor, though not everypony appreciates it equally.” She looked around the table and saw they were all looking at her expectantly. “Very well. Shall I tell you a joke?”

“Oh this oughta be rich,” Applejack said, leaning forward on the table, a smirk appearing on her face. “Go right ahead.”

“Acknowledged.” She paused, her ears twitching. “Applejack, what is covered with fur, has four legs, and makes barking sounds?”

Applejack blinked and glanced over to the corner of the room, where Winona was sleeping soundly. “Uh… a dog?”

“Oh. My apologies. I see that you have already heard that joke.”

The room was silent at first. Then, suddenly, Big Mac began to snicker, then loudly guffaw. It spread to Apple Bloom and Granny Smith.

“That’s a good one, Turing!” Apple Bloom managed to say.

“Thank you,” she replied.

Applejack, meanwhile, whipped her head around, staring at her family members in confusion. “What?! That… that ain’t even a joke!”

“Oh, lighten up, Applejack!” Apple Bloom said, placing a hoof on her sister’s shoulder, still laughing at Turing’s “joke.”

“I’m plenty lightened up! But that’s… I mean…”

“I did warn you that not everypony appreciates my style of humor,” Turing Test said.

“But that ain’t even funny!” Applejack shouted, startling everypony else at the table. “That’d be like if I said, ‘What has feathered wings and flies?’ And then you said--”

“A very unhygienic pegasus?”

This got another round of laughter as Applejack grit her teeth, barely holding in the scream of rage she felt building in her gut.

“Hoo-wee, you might talk kinda funny an’ look a little different, but yer quite a jokester in addition to bein’ a hard worker there, Miss Turing!” Granny Smith said, wiping her eyes.

Applejack frowned, but fell silent and stuffed a whole sprig of broccoli in her mouth.

“So, Apple Bloom, what did ya learn in school today?” Granny Smith asked.

“Well, we read some stories, an’ that was pretty fun.” The filly scratched her head, trying to remember. “An’ then we had math, an’ Miss Cheerilee gave us homework. But we also talked about the Princesses!”

“That right?” Granny Smith asked. “An’ what did ya learn?”

“Well, we didn’t learn all that much about Twilight,” Apple Bloom said, “but I guess I can ask her myself. We did learn a lot about how they run things in Canterlot, though!”

Turing leaned closer. “I would be interested in learning about that as well.”

Applejack narrowed her eyes. “Wait, you live with a Princess of Equestria an’ you don’t know about that?”

“It has not been a major focus of my efforts. It seems that Twilight Sparkle’s duties in the larger role of governing Equestria are still relatively undefined. I am, however, aware that she holds authority when the other Princesses are unable to perform their duties. A significant portion of her other work beyond furthering the goal of Friendship involves diplomatic relations.”

“Well, that’s good to know,” Apple Bloom said, nodding her head. “But as fer Canterlot, it looks like Equestria is pretty much run by Celestia. An a lil’ bit by Luna, I guess, but our textbooks are from before she came back from the moon.”

“You mean to say that Celestia makes all decisions regarding the laws of Equestria?”

“Yeah, I guess, but the book says that there’s this group o’ ponies called… um…” Apple Bloom shut her eyes, trying to remember the term. “Oh! That’s right!” she exclaimed, her eyes popping open again. “The Royal Cabinet! They’re a group o’ ponies called Ministers that take care o’ different things around Equestria and give their advice to Celestia so she can make the best decision!”

“How are these Ministers selected?” Turing asked, apparently quite engrossed in the topic.

“Miss Cheerilee says Princess Celestia chooses ‘em, but a lot of ‘em come from old Canterlot families an’ stuff.”

“Understood,” Turing Test intoned. “Thank you for the information, Apple Bloom.”

“Well, looks like yer doin’ just fine in class then,” Granny Smith said, a warm smile on her face.

The family settled into relaxed silence as they continued eating. This was punctuated by the whirring sound of Turing’s neck as she intently watched them, glancing from one to another.

This eventually caught Applejack’s attention and she raised an eyebrow. “Somethin’ on yer mind?” she asked.

Turing shook her head. “No. I am merely observing you as you eat. I find it fascinating.” She turned to look at Big Mac, who was wolfing down his broccoli. “Incredible.”

The stallion paused in the middle of chewing, glancing back at her nervously.

“Well,” Applejack quipped with a roll of her eyes, “nothin’ like a little bit o’ awkwardness durin’ dinner.”

“Applejack, you hush!” Granny Smith snapped. “She’s just curious is all! Ain’t nothin’ awkward about it!”

Then came a loud, groaning creak and the sound of wood splintering and Turing suddenly seemed to be a few inches shorter.

“Oh,” she said. “Perhaps I should--”

The chair finally snapped as the legs gave out and Turing crashed to the floor, the wooden chair clattering in a pile of debris.

“It seems my weight exceeded the load-bearing limitations of the chair,” she intoned from beneath the table. “I apologize for damaging your furniture. Also your floor.”

Granny Smith sighed. “All righty, now it’s awkward.” She pushed back her plate. “Welp, who wants pie?”

***

After dinner and dessert, Big Mac challenged Turing Test to a game of Reversi. Turing Test played black, while Big Mac played white. They sat in the living room, playing on a coffee table while Applejack did the dishes.

The first game had been close, with Big Mac narrowly beating Turing Test (despite it being the first time she’d ever played the game).

The second time, Big Mac swore was the toughest game he’d ever played in his life and he lost outright.

“Hmm,” Big Mac grunted, wiping his brow as he stared down at the finished board.

“I apologize for defeating you, Big McIntosh,” Turing said. “My ability to analyze the rules and predict movesets gives me a significant advantage. I will understand if you do not wish to play again. Do you wish to cease this activity?”

But, to her surprise, Big Mac shook his head. “Nope!” he said. “About the only pony that ever beats me is Applejack. An’ even then it ain’t too often. I’d like to see if I can beat a robot.” He smiled at her. “If ya’d like to.”

Turing nodded. “Affirmative. I hope I will continue to provide a challenge.”

Just then, they heard Granny Smith call from upstairs: “Applejack! Can ya come up here an’ check my math? I think I got this here budget figured out, but I need somepony to double check!”

“In a minute, Granny!” Applejack hollered back from the kitchen. “I’m still tryin’ to finish up the dishes!”

Turing Test stood up. “Perhaps I can be of assistance,” she said. “Big McIntosh, may we postpone our game?”

He nodded. “Eeyup!”

“Thank you.” That said, she made her way up the stairs to the family study, where Granny Smith was surrounded by several stacks of paper.

“Huh?” Granny Smith said, seeing the mechanical mare in the doorway. “What’re you doin’ here? Thought you were relaxin’ with my grandson downstairs.”

“That is correct. However, I heard your call for assistance and I believe I may be able to help.”

“That right?” Granny Smith scratched her head and looked over at the papers. “Well, if ya feel like givin’ it a shot, be my guest!”

“Acknowledged.” Turing looked down at the final sums that Granny had written down, then went to one stack after another, flipping rapidly through the pages and scanning them. Her eyes constricted a moment as she processed the data, then she went to the the final sums once again.

“There was a slight miscalculation in your expenditures,” she said. “This figure should be increased by 150 bits. However, you would reduce your expenditures by up to 5% by purchasing your oats in bulk. Spike the Dragon orders them from Oatmeal Raisin once a month.”

“No foolin’?!” Granny Smith exclaimed, looking at the new figures. “Well, don’t that just beat all! Thank ya kindly, Miss Turing!”

“You are welcome, Granny Smith.”

Then a small voice shouted “Wowee!” and they both turned to see Apple Bloom standing in the doorway.

“Apple Bloom, I thought you were doin’ yer homework,” Granny Smith said, frowning.

“I was!” Apple Bloom protested. “Honest! I was just gettin’ up fer a drink o’ water when I saw Turing Test workin’ with ya!” She ran over to Turing Test. “You must be one o’ the smartest ponies in Equestria to do math like that!”

“It is merely an ability that I possess,” Turing replied. “It is not difficult.”

“Then, um… do ya think you can help me with my math homework? Usually Applejack does it, buuut…”

“Affirmative,” Turing replied, nodding her head slightly. “I will assist you.”

“Apple Bloom,” Granny Smith said, narrowing her eyes at the filly, “you know that Applejack just checks yer homework. Don’t go makin’ Miss Turing do it all!”

“I understand.” She looked down at Apple Bloom. “I will be happy to check your answers to determine if they are correct.”

“Great!” Apple Bloom said, and took her by the hoof. “C’mon, I’ll show ya my room!”

Turing wasn’t sure why Apple Bloom felt the need to take her hoof, but she didn’t protest as Apple Bloom made her way up the hall to her room. The homework, scrawled in pencil on a simple worksheet, was lying on Apple Bloom’s desk next to her open textbook.

“I went through it with an abacus, but I ain’t quite sure I got ‘em all.”

Turing gave another quick nod and glanced at the paper. A mere moment later, she said, “Numbers 3, 7, and 8 are incorrect.”

“What?!” Apple Bloom cried, leaping forward and resting her hooves on the desk. “That’s impossible! Ohhhh, why is this stuff so hard?!”

“Mathematics is primarily a function of determining rules and applying them. For instance, it seems that your answer to number three is a result of not knowing the rules of order of operations.”

Apple Bloom frowned and glanced up at her. “Say what now?”

“Question number 3 asks for the result of the equation ‘6 + 2 x 3.’ You added six to two first, but order of operation dictates that you perform multiplication function first.”

“Oh!” she said, seeming to understand. “Then, the answer is… 12?”

“Correct.”

Apple Bloom cheered, rearing up and kicking her forelegs. “I think I got it! So, uh, which do ya do first fer these; mutiplyin’ or subtractin’?”

“Multiplication and division are equally important, followed by addition and subtraction. Therefore, you should multiply or divide before you add or subtract.”

“Then I think I know why I got them other problems wrong! Lemme just fix those, and…”

She erased her other incorrect answers and re-did the equations as Turing Test stood by.

“...okay! How ‘bout now?”

Turing nodded. “All answers are correct.”

“All right!” she cheered, hugging Turing Test. “Thanks, Turing!”

“What the… Apple Bloom?”

They both turned to see Applejack in the doorway, her mouth slightly agape. “Wh-what’s goin’ on here?”

“I am assisting Apple Bloom with her math homework.”

“She just looked at it fer barely more’n a second an’ she told me which ones were wrong, Applejack!” Apple Bloom added, grinning brightly. “Plus I think I’m startin’ to get this now!”

“Yeah, but… I mean…” Applejack stammered.

“Hm? What is it?” Apple Bloom asked, raising an eyebrow.

“It’s just… you know, usually it’s me that helps with yer homework,” Applejack murmured.

Turing’s ears shifted. “Have I overstepped my obligation to your family, Applejack?”

“N-no, it’s just…”

She paused, seeing only a blank stare from Apple Bloom and an even blanker stare from Turing Test.

“Tch! Never mind!” she said with a click of her tongue. “Y’all do whatever; I’m just gonna hit the hay early tonight!”

They watched as she turned and left the room.

“Have I done something inappropriate, Apple Bloom?” Turing asked, tilting her head as she looked down at the young filly.

“I don’t think so, but just the same Applejack seems to be actin’ funny lately,” Apple Bloom replied. She heaved a sigh. “I know she’s frustrated about that thing with her hips an’ all… maybe she’s just worried about this harvest an’ it’s makin’ her cranky?”

“I see.” She then tapped her chin, raising her head slightly, then said, “Apple Bloom, I wish to have one more game with Big McIntosh, but after that, would you mind recharging my battery? I have expended a significant amount of power and may require more tomorrow.”

“Sure thing!” Apple Bloom replied, smiling up at her. Then, to Turing’s surprise, she actually gave her a small hug. “It’s the least I can do to thank ya fer all the help yer doin’ around the farm!”

Turing’s ears raised. “Acknowledged. You are welcome, Apple Bloom.”

***

That night, as the rest of the Apple Family slept, Turing Test sat in the guest room, her bed undisturbed and unused.

She’d chosen not to go into sleep mode, but instead had merely waited, listening to the sounds of the house and waiting to hear any signs that any of the others were awake. When she was certain that none of them were, she got up slowly and, as quietly as her whirring mechanical limbs would allow, made her way to the door, down the hallway, descended the stairs, and left through the front door.

The Apples are unlike any other ponies I have encountered. Their treatment of me has been accepting and hospitable to the point of allowing me inside their home as one of them. My assistance was offered without expectation of compensation, and yet they act as though they feel I must be compensated in some way. The nature of this relationship warrants further investigation.

She walked across the darkened yard and straight to the barn, opening the door and walking inside. It was pitch black inside the musty old building, but her eyes allowed her to see in almost total darkness, so she swiftly went to the nearest cart and began loading it up with buckets.

The Apples are so kind to me. I wish to show my appreciation. Furthermore, if Applejack is concerned about the harvest, then I may become friends with her by alleviating those worries.

Clouds passed over the pale moon, dimming the silvery light that barely illuminated the orchard. And yet, as the world slept, a robot made her way down the dirt path and into the orchard, beginning her work in the thick shadows beneath the canopy of the trees.

***

Applejack groaned and sat up in bed. Through her window, she saw that it was still dark outside; Celestia hadn’t even raised the sun yet. She smacked her lips and stretched her back. She’d worked hours less than usual the previous day and she’d gone to bed early, and her body now told her that she had slept quite enough and should get up and get moving. The fact that it was too early to be up was apparently of no consequence… she just wasn’t tired.

Grumbling to herself, she slipped out of bed, taking her hat from the hat rack by her bed and placing it on her head. In her mirror, she put her straw-colored mane up in a braid as usual and walked out into the hallway, stepping lightly to not wake her still-sleeping family. If she was up, she reasoned, she might as well get a head start on her chores.

But as she walked downstairs to the kitchen and started to heat the water for her coffee, she heard a strange rumbling sound outside. She squinted and peered out into the still darkness. Something was moving out by the barn. It sounded very familiar… the sound of a cart being pulled down a bumpy dirt road. And in the dark she saw what looked like two violet points of light that were slowly moving and bobbing rhythmically toward the house.

Her eyes went wide. “Oh fer Pete’s sake!”

She galloped out the back door and ran over to the barn. Sure enough, Turing Test, eyes illuminating the path, was hauling a cart that was completely full of apples.

“Good morning, Applejack,” Turing Test said, coming to a stop. In the violet light from her own gaze, she could see that Applejack had her teeth grit and was seething at her. “You appear to be upset. Did I wake you? If so, I apologize; I was attempting to minimize noise as I worked.”

“What the hay do you think you’re doin’ out here?!” Applejack shouted.

“I am the hay harvesting apples.”

Applejack got right in Turing’s face. “I mean why are you harvestin’ apples at this hour!”

“I have actually been harvesting apples for this and many other hours. Six hours and twelve minutes, to be exact.”

Applejack’s jaw dropped open. “You’ve been workin’ all dang night?!”

“Affirmative. The harvest is now at 91% completion. I estimate that it be completed in approximately one hour and ten minutes.”

“But… but why?” Applejack stammered, looking at her helplessly. “Why didn’t ya just wait until today so we could do it together?!”

Turing cocked her head to the side, her ears working. “There was no reason to do so. Organic ponies require sleep to maintain their health. I, however, do not. Entering sleep mode for a period of several hours was determined to be inefficient, so I felt I could best assist your family by continuing to work at night while you all slept.”

Applejack opened her mouth and worked her jaw as she tried to find the words. “But I… I mean, why couldn’t ya just let me…”

Turing Test waited for her to say more, but finally Applejack just heaved a sigh.

“Never mind,” she whispered. “Just go ahead and finish up… I guess I’ll go do my mornin’ chores an’ such. That’s somethin’ at least.”

Turing Test watched her go and then continued to haul the apples back to the barn. She continued to do so in silence until the sun finally began to rise, finishing just in time for the rest of the family to come out and see her bring in the very last haul of apples.

They greeted her with cheers and with praise and thanked her profoundly for all she’d done for them. All of them, Turing noted, except for Applejack, who was curiously absent.

***

The Apple family was gathered at their kitchen table once again. At the end of the table, however, sat an outsider.

“Ya know, we don’t usually have somepony else at a family meetin’,” Applejack remarked, pointing in Turing Test’s direction.

“Maybe not,” Granny Smith said, “but all things considered, I think it might be good to have ‘er right here fer this ‘un.”

Applejack crossed her forelegs. “I s’pose,” she grumbled.

Turing Test looked around at the face of the other Apples. “Was my action unwanted?”

“Nope!” Big Mac said, shaking his head.

“Big Mac’s right!” Apple Bloom agreed. “We got our harvest in a few days early! We ain’t never done that before!”

“Darn tootin’!” Granny Smith exclaimed. “Point is, Miss Turing, that with this much time, we can ship out some orders an’ sell the rest in the market right now. We got three or four whole days extra to do whatever we feel like!”

“Ooh, ooh!” Apple Bloom jumped up from her seat. “We should go on a family vacation! That way we can all relax an’ Applejack can take a rest on account o’ her Bucker’s Hips!”

“My hips are just fine!” Applejack shouted, pounding her hoof on the table, glaring at her younger sister. “Ain’t no cause to relax right now!”

“Yer sister’s right, Apple Bloom,” Granny Smith said, holding up a piece of paper she’d brought to the table. “I did a quick tally with Miss Turing here after givin’ the budget a second look this mornin’, and I think we can do a whole lot fer the farm if we use the next few days to take on some new projects.”

“Now we’re talkin’!” Applejack said, her frown replaced with a grin. “No time like the present to get ahead o’ the game!”

Granny Smith laughed. “That’s the spirit there, Applejack! Gotta strike while the iron is hot, after all. So, that bein’ the case, I suggest we plant a cover crop o’ winter rye in the western field an’ make an early bunch o’ cider. Instead o’ breakin’ even this year, we just might come out ahead!”

The others all smiled broadly at that.

“All Apples in favor?” Granny Smith asked. Four hooves, her own included, shot straight up. “Then it looks like we got ourselves some work to do!”

Applejack heaved a sigh of relief and smiled at Turing Test. “Well, thanks fer all yer help, Turing Test,” Applejack said, tipping her hat slightly, “but I guess we can take it from here.”

Turing looked to Applejack, and then to each of the others’ faces. They were all smiling as well. “Then my assistance is no longer required?”

“Nope!” Applejack said, shaking her head. She pushed back from the table. “I’ll go help ya with yer things an’ then--”

“May I stay?”

This got a look of confusion from all except for Apple Bloom, who gasped and broke into a bright smile.

“Well, uh, I mean,” Granny Smith said as she rubbed her chin, “yer welcome to stay here until Twilight comes back, but we don’t wanna take advantage o’ yer kindness…”

“On the contrary,” Turing said, holding a hoof to her chest. “I am enjoying my time with all of you… with y’all.”

This got a look of surprise from three of the Apples and a chuckle from Big Mac.

“I wish to repay your kindness. It is no trouble for me to provide assistance, and I am certain that I can contribute significantly to completing these new objectives as well as any others on this farm. Will you allow me to assist you?”

Applejack swallowed. “Th-that’s mighty kind o’ ya,” she started to say.

“It sure is!” Apple Bloom exclaimed before Applejack could continue. “I think we should say yes, everypony! Turing Test is fun an’ she’s nice an’ we really could use an extra hoof!”

“Eeyup!” Big Mac added.

“Well, I guess if that’s what ya want, then we might as well!” Granny Smith declared, giving a decisive nod.

“Now hang on a minute!” Applejack exclaimed, holding a hoof out. This drew stares from the rest of her family and she cringed. “Well, I mean… we don’t wanna take advantage o’ somepony, do we?”

“The idiom ‘to take advantage of somepony’ implies utilizing a pony in a way that is unfair and contrary to the desires of that pony. However, providing assistance appears to be mutually beneficial for both myself and your family.”

“Sure seems that way,” Granny Smith said. She narrowed her eyes at Applejack. “Unless you got another reason why she shouldn’t be helpin’ us out?”

“W-well, I mean…”

Applejack’s eyes darted around. She was met by the innocently curious gaze from Apple Bloom and the suspicious eyebrow raises of Big Mac and Granny Smith. And then there was the eternally blank stare coming from the robot. And in her heart, she knew she had no real reason to object.

At least, no reason that didn’t sound selfish, even to her.

“No. I guess yer right,” she said, forcing herself to smile. “Guess we best get started!”

Turing raised a hoof. “Yee-haw.”

***

A short while later, Applejack was out by the road with a hammer and a can of nails as she fixed a broken fence. She picked a nail up in her teeth, pushed it slightly into the new rail, then picked up a hammer and rapidly began hammering the nail into the wood. She’d been so focused on the task, she didn’t even hear the telltale sounds of hooves slowly making their way over to her.

Granny Smith watched as Applejack grit her teeth and pounded the nail into the wood with far more vigor and energy and aggression than anypony had a reason to use for simple repair work.

“Applejack.”

“Gah!” Applejack shouted in surprise, causing the hammer to go flying from her mouth and sail by Granny Smith, narrowly missing the older mare’s head.

“Oh jeez Louise, Granny, are you all right?!” Applejack exclaimed, rushing over to her.

“Fine, fine, thank goodness,” Granny said, rolling her eyes. “Really, though, I should be asking you that question.”

“Huh? What question?”

“What I mean is, Applejack… are you all right?”

Applejack blinked, then frowned and tossed her mane back. “O’ course I am!” she replied. “No reason not to be!”

“Just ‘cause you ain’t got a reason don’t mean you ain’t,” Granny Smith said quietly, watching her granddaughter retrieve the hammer. “Look, uh, about Turing Test…”

Applejack made no visible reaction. “Yeah? What about her?”

“I talked to Big Mac. Honey, I know how yer feelin’,” she sighed and patted her own hip. “Believe me, if anypony understands this, it’s me. When I first found out I had Bucker’s Hips myself--”

“Granny…”

“--I thought it was all over. But that just wasn’t true!”

“Granny.”

“No sirree, and it ain’t over fer you! Ya just need to pull back a bit an’ let that nice robot help!”

“Granny!” Applejack shouted, this time loud enough to stun Granny Smith into silence.

“Y-yes?” she asked. “What is it?”

“Look, it ain’t the help I mind!” Applejack exclaimed. “I told Twilight that!”

Granny Smith blinked. “Well, then what’s eatin’ ya?”

“It’s… I mean…” Applejack bit her lip. “W-well what about you?”

She tilted her head. “Uh, what about me?”

Applejack tapped the fence. “This here fence is the same one that got damaged by the Flim Flam brothers when they came through here with their contraption. You remember that?”

Granny Smith scoffed, rolling her eyes. “Well, o’ course I do! Dang troublemakers!”

“Well, ya sure minded when they came through here tryin’ to automate the whole cider-makin’ process with that contraption o’ theirs,” Applejack said, glancing around and lowering her voice. “But, I mean… how’s this any different?”

Granny Smith blinked a few times, furrowing her brow. “Whaddya mean ‘this?’” she asked. Then her eyes widened. “Wait, you mean Miss Turing?”

“Well, it ain’t exactly different--”

“The hay it ain’t!” Granny Smith shouted, stomping a hoof. “Them carpetbaggers were just gonna make a mass-produced version o’ our cider fer the sake o’ doin’ it quicker! An’ sure enough, just as soon as the goin’ got tough, they went an’ sacrificed the quality to beat us in that race!”

“Yeah, but now we’re usin’ a machine just to speed things up around here!” Applejack said. “That ain’t exactly traditional!”

Granny Smith shook her head. “That nice young pony is volunteerin’ to help. She’s a pony first an’ a machine second in my book. Besides,” she added with a chuckle, “I like her.”

“You… what?”

“Personality counts fer a whole heck o’ a lot, Applejack,” Granny Smith said. “Last I checked that Squeeziny Cider 66 wasn’t makin’ jokes at dinner, helpin’ save the farm for free, an’ checkin’ Apple Bloom’s homework. Besides, it ain’t like she’s gonna change how we do things around here. She may be a machine, but she’s doin’ things our way, like she’s one o’ us.

“So really, is that yer problem? That she’s a machine?”

Applejack swallowed. “Yes.” Her eyes shifted slightly to the left.

Granny Smith frowned. “Yer a bad liar, Applejack, an’ that’s why ya oughtn’t do it!” She turned and began plodding back down the road. “When you feel like tellin’ us all what’s really stuck in yer craw, you know where to find us!”

Applejack grumbled to herself and went back to her task.

Not five minutes went by when she heard the rumbling of wheels and saw Turing Test hauling a large wagon filled with crates of apples ready to be shipped. The robot paused as she came up alongside Applejack.

“Hello, Applejack,” Turing Test said.

“Howdy,” Applejack said flatly, continuing to fix the fence without looking up at her.

“I am hauling these apples to Barnyard Bargains. Mr. Filthy Rich has an order for them.”

“That’s nice,” Applejack replied, still not looking at her.

“You appear to be repairing that fence.”

“Yep. That’s what I’m doin’.” She bent down to take another nail only to see that the can was gone. “What the--” Then she looked up.

Turing Test had levitated the can over to her and was levitating out one nail at a time. She quickly drew one out and then drove it into the wood with her hoof in a single blow. She repeated that same motion several times and finished the rest of the repair work in less than a minute. She then trotted over to Applejack and placed the can of nails back on the ground as Applejack gawked at her.

“Repair work is completed. You are welcome.” That said, Turing Test went back to the cart, slipping the harness back over herself as she began to trot back down the road.

Applejack stared after her. She clenched her teeth and pawed at the dirt, breathing through her nostrils like a wild, feral mustang.

Ya think yer so great? Applejack said to herself. Yer so much better’n me?! Well, we’ll just see about that!

***

That afternoon, Applejack went out to the eastern field and began plowing it, readying it for the cover crop of winter rye. A few minutes in, Turing came out as well. She watched Applejack plowing, stopping occasionally when the plow hit a stone, and began to plow from the opposite side. Applejack watched as she rapidly pulled the heavy plow through the hard dirt, occasionally stopping, giving a simple stomp that launched an offending stone into the air, and smashing it between her hooves before proceeding.

In the time it took Applejack to do a quarter of the field, Turing did the other three quarters.

And before Applejack could go to retrieve the rye seeds, Turing had galloped back to the barn, retrieved them herself, and then switched to U-Mode to evenly plant the seeds rapidly in each row, perfectly spaced from one another.

The next day, after another dinner of odd jokes and Turing learning more games to play with Big Mac and checking Apple Bloom’s homework, Applejack had decided to try to clear the land of some old tree stumps.

She’d gone out to where the old stumps were with some shovels and hatchets only to see that Turing was already there. The robot was yanking out the entire stump, roots and all, from the ground with her bare hooves.

And then later that day, Turing had used her P-Mode to retrieve a rain cloud from over the Everfree Forest to water the western field and start growing the winter rye.

And then they’d started harvesting the more bitter apples to begin making cider, and of course Turing did most of the work in a fraction of time.

And when Applejack had offered to help Granny Smith fix dinner, apparently she’d already agreed to teach Turing Test. Over dinner, the others eagerly described to Turing how to make cider.

Sure enough, the next morning they had several barrels of cider that Turing had made herself overnight.

After three days, Applejack looked around to see what needed doing on her farm and saw that there really was nothing to do. Big Mac was in town selling apples, Granny Smith and Turing Test were organizing items in the attic, and Apple Bloom was at school.

She’d even offered to meet Apple Bloom after school to walk her home and the little filly had said “Great! Turing Test said she’d do the same, so we can all come home together!” And then she’d mumbled some half-hearted excuse to get herself out of it.

That morning, already hearing Turing Test working outside on some task, Applejack walked by the robot’s room and spied the crank generator.

If I could just smash that contraption, she’d have no way to charge herself.

She reeled back. Had she really just thought that? Had she really considered sabotaging Turing Test by breaking her charger?

She lowered her head and ears, cheeks burning in shame. What would her family think of her if they’d known she’d even considered such an idea?

***

So there she was, on the third day, sitting out on the back porch in a rocking chair, reading a book. Or at least she was trying to read a book. In reality, she’d read and re-read the same page half a dozen times, unable to focus. Finally she grunted and set the book aside, laying back in the rocker.

“Nice weather, ain’t it?”

Applejack sat up, hearing Granny Smith’s voice as she came out the back door.

“I guess. Pegasi are keepin’ things a mite warm for this late in autumn,” Applejack replied.

“Maybe so,” Granny Smith replied. She held up a bag in one hoof. “By the way, that nice Miss Fluttershy came by. Says she’s back after spendin’ time with that friend o’ hers. Even brought us a nice gift.”

Applejack leaned over from where she sat and saw the bag was filled with dozens of brown, arrow-shaped mushrooms.

“That was nice of her,” Applejack said, taking one out. She popped it in her mouth and chewed it, then made a face. “Eugh!” She swallowed but spat off to the side of the porch. “The hay kinda mushrooms are these?”

“Didn’t say,” Granny Smith said, frowning. “They really that bad?” She took one for herself, then gagged instantly, spitting it out as well. “Good gravy, yer right! Might have to double-boil them things before we put ‘em in a stew.”

Applejack rolled her eyes as Granny Smith took a seat in her own rocker. “Oh well,” Granny Smith said. “Sure is a nice day fer sittin’ out on the porch, ain’t it?”

Applejack made no response. “Wouldn’t know. I’d rather be doin’ something with my time.”

“Personally, a nice sit outside on a day like today is about the best thing since sliced bread.” She let out a contented sigh, closing her eyes as she began to rock back and forth.

“Honestly, Granny? I’m squirmin’ like a worm on a hook! I oughta be on my hooves, gettin’ chores done, doin’...” she bit her lip, eyes darting back and forth, “I dunno… somethin’!”

“Chores are done, we’re days ahead o’ schedule, an’ there ain’t nothin’ wrong with takin’ a load off,” Granny Smith said, covering her mouth with her hoof as she yawned. “Just sit back and take a load off. Trust me, someday when yer an old nag like me, you’ll appreciate an afternoon nap! Try to relax.”

“R-relax?!” Applejack stammered, sitting up. She turned and stared at the older mare as she reclined in the chair… and Applejack suddenly felt as though she were looking at her own future.

With a sharp cry, she leaped off the chair and darted away from the porch, leaving her grandmother behind. She ran across the orchard, darting through the rows of trees now bare of apples and showing their autumn colors. She ran and made her way to the top of a hill overlooking her farm.

Her farm.

There was a tree next to her, a tall sturdy oak. Still breathing hard from her run, she felt her rage boil over and ran over to the tree, whirling around and bucking it with all her might. And then she kicked it again. And again. And again. Over and over she kicked it, letting a scream of frustration build in her throat until it burst forth as a mighty howl that echoed across the orchard. And yet she continued to kick the tree until at last she felt the first painful stings in her hips and she threw herself to the ground, sobbing like a newborn filly.

Relax?! How could anypony relax! she asked herself. No matter what I do, I can’t win! This here is my farm, my home, an’ now she’s the one who’s runnin’ it all! Better’n me! Better’n I ever was! Better’n I ever will be! They don’t need…

She shut her eyes tightly, trying to avoid the awful thought coming to her.

They don’t need me anymore.

She let out one last sob and felt the fight drain out of her. That was the awful truth of it. Turing Test was right there, doing her job, doing everypony else’s job for free, and the farm was prospering. The robot had done them a huge service and with each task completed, she earned even more praise from the other Apple family members. And what could Applejack do to fight that? It wasn’t in the farm’s best interest to send her away, and if she lost her temper, she’d only seem like an immature, jealous little foal.

And all the while, Turing would just keep working away. She’d never need to rest, never get tired, never get sick, and she’d work quickly and efficiently and even Applejack had to admit that the mechanical mare was nice to boot.

It was all over; Turing Test was unbeatable. And Applejack realized she needed to face the harsh truth of what was happening to her.

With a shaky sigh, she gradually got to her hooves. The pain in her hips was subsiding at least. But as she stood, she wobbled slightly.

For some reason, she felt lightheaded and her cheeks felt slightly numb.

“Applejack?”

She gasped and whirled around. Turing Test was standing there. She hadn’t even heard the robot’s approach.

“Turing Test,” Applejack said, narrowing her eyes at her. “Look, I appreciate all you’ve done, but I think you’ve done enough. Please,” she said, putting her hooves together, “just… just go home. I can’t stand it no more! I can’t stand just sittin’ around like a bump on a log while you do all the work!”

Turing Test stared back at her in silence. “We are not… friends?”

Applejack heaved a sigh. “No. No, we ain’t.”

And then she froze when she saw Turing Test give a shrug of her mechanical shoulders. “That’s fine by me. I reckon I don’t really care.”

Applejack blinked. “W-what?” she whispered. “What’s goin’ on? Why’re ya talkin’ like that?”

“Well, thing is, Applejack,” Turing said, trotting over to her, “I already decided that I like it here. An’ the rest o’ yer family like me. I think I’ll settle in an’ become the newest member o’ the Apple clan. After all, it ain’t like they need you anymore.”

There was a quick movement and suddenly Applejack’s hat was on Turing’s head.

“My hat!” Applejack shouted, leaping to take it back.

“Guess it’s mine now, ‘sugarcube.’” Turing gave a distorted, synthetic chuckle. “Beep boop, y’all.”

“I knew you were trouble from the moment I laid eyes on ya!” Applejack shouted, lunging at Turing Test again. “I never shoulda trusted ya!”

“Hindsight’s 20-20. But look on the bright side… Big Mac and Apple Bloom are getting a much more efficient sister, and Sweet Apple Acres will be bigger and better than ever!” She continued backing away as Applejack futily took another swipe at her, reaching for the hat. “As for you… you should retire. An organic pony like you shouldn’t work so hard. You should just… relax.”

At that, Applejack exploded and took off after Turing Test, who laughed tauntingly as she seemed to effortlessly keep ahead of her, and followed her down the hill and through the trees… right up to the edge of the Everfree Forest.

She skidded to a halt as Turing Test ran inside.

“What is the matter, Applejack?” came Turing’s voice from somewhere deep in the forest’s shadows. “I suppose fear is another one of your weaknesses. As a robot, it is not a weakness I have. That is just one more reason that I am your superior.”

“I… I ain’t afraid o’ you!” Applejack roared. “I’ll finish this once an’ fer all!”

And with that, she ran right into the depths of the forest.

***

Back at the house, Turing Test poked her head out the back door. “Granny Smith, I will now go to retrieve Apple Bloom from school. Do you require any further assistance, or do you wish for me to retrieve any groceries or supplies?”

Granny Smith was staring at her hoof. “Mm?” she murmured. “No. I… I don’t reckon.”

Turing nodded. “Very well. If you see Applejack, please inform her of my status.”

She was about to turn and go back into the house when she caught a faint sound in the distance. Her mechanical ears twitched and she thought she heard Applejack’s voice, but only for an instant. She briefly considered investigating the sound, but decided that if anypony could handle themselves, it was Applejack.

She shut the back door behind her.

To be continued...

Author's Notes:

As per usual, thanks everyone for reading! Also, if you're still hungry for more, there's a deleted scene that you can check out in my blog.

I was also going to have a line at dinner where Granny or AJ asked if anypony wanted to say "grace," which would cause Turing to momentarily panic, impulsively thinking about that other Grace. I cut it for length and because I didn't want to bring the concept of religion into the fic and have that be something people could bicker about in the comments just for the sake of a joke.

No references this time, but a note about the chapter illustration, drawn as always by my good buddy Mr. Colby Green. You might have noticed that there are no chairs in the picture despite it being part of the scene. If so, well, that's my fault. I neglected to mention it to the guy and it would have been too difficult to change so late in the game. Still, I thought it was a charming picture and I still wanted to use it, so if you have a complaint, go ahead and lodge it at me, not the artist.

Next time, we'll see if the conflict mushrooms into something even bigger than before.

Apple Computer, Part 3

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As Turing Test and Apple Bloom came up over the last hill before reaching the family home, Turing’s ears twitched, and she focused on something in the distance.

“Huh?” Apple Bloom asked, following the mechanical mare’s gaze. “Whatcha lookin’ at, Turing?”

“Granny Smith is on the barn.”

“She’s in the barn?” Apple Bloom asked, squinting and shielding her eyes from the sun with one hoof. “I don’t see--”

“Repeating: she is on the barn.”

Apple Bloom looked upwards and saw that Granny Smith was slowly climbing the roof of the barn, a ladder leaned against it.

“W-what?” she cried, picking up her pace. “What the hay is she doin’?!”

Granny Smith was atop the barn now and approaching the edge. She noticed Apple Bloom and Turing Test in the distance and waved to them.

“Helloooo, young ‘un!” she hollered.

Apple Bloom froze in place. “Granny, what are you doin’ up there? Get down before ya get hurt!”

“Yer just in time fer the surprise!” Granny Smith called back.

“W-what surprise?”

The elderly mare spread her forelegs wide and flashed a wide grin. “I can fly!”

She stepped over the edge.

“Granny!” Apple Bloom shrieked.

Turing Test took off instantly in an attempt to catch the falling mare. Unfortunately, she could already tell that she was not close enough to catch her in time.

More fortunately, somepony else was.

A red blur came barreling out from behind the chicken coops and leaped into the air, snatching Granny Smith out of her fall and tumbling to the ground.

“Big Mac!” Apple Bloom shouted, coming up behind Turing, who had already slowed her pace after seeing the stallion’s rescue. “Is Granny okay?”

Big Mac stood and jerked his head over at Granny Smith, who had rolled onto her back and was giggling like a filly. “Lookit me go, young ‘uns!” she said, spreading her forelegs wide. “I’m a pe~egasu~usss!”

The two Apple siblings looked to each other, then back at Granny Smith, who stood up on wobbly hooves. “Uh, Granny,” Apple Bloom said slowly, “you ain’t a pegasus.”

“Pfft, if that’s the case,” she said, gesturing exaggeratedly at her own back, “then whaddya call these?”

Apple Bloom narrowed her eyes. “These what?”

“My wings! Can’t ya see ‘em?”

Big Mac made a face. “Nnnope.”

“Well, just cuz y’all can’t see ‘em doesn’t mean that I… um…” She glanced around, smacking her lips. “Wait, how’d I get out here again?”

Turing looked down at Apple Bloom. “Apple Bloom, does your grandmother often suffer from dementia?”

“She ain’t got dementia!” Apple Bloom snapped. “At least... I don’t think so.”

Turing Test looked to Granny Smith and walked over to her. She noticed the elder mare’s eyes were wide, glassy, and unfocused, her pupils dilated.

“Granny Smith, are you well?” Turing asked.

“Why sure!” she replied. “Bit hot, though. An’ it sure is bright out here. Loud too. Told them trees to shut their yaps but good luck gettin’ ‘em to listen. But it’s all right, I told one o’ the chickens to handle it. If they ain’t gonna listen to Princess Henlestia, they won’t listen to nopony else, I tell ya whut!”

Apple Bloom swallowed. “Um, I’m not sure if this is a joke or not, but I-I’m kinda scared right now,” she said. Big Mac put his hoof on her shoulder, steadying her.

“Big McIntosh, will you please attend to her?” Turing said, looking back at them. “Her readings are strange and likely correlate with her behavior. I will investigate the area for a possible cause.”

Turing was about to step away when Granny Smith suddenly seized her foreleg.

“Heyyy, Miss Turing, I was wonderin’,” she said, grinning slyly, “what do you think about my grandson?”

She glanced over her shoulder, winking at the stallion, who smacked his forehead and groaned. “Aw, Granny…”

“I’m just sayin’, ya could do worse’n a nice young gal like her!”

Turing slipped her foreleg from Granny Smith’s grasp and quickly moved away. She decided that later she would try to figure out what Granny Smith had meant, and why Big McIntosh seemed so agitated all of a sudden.

She circled to the back of the farmhouse, scanning every detail of her surroundings. Granny Smith had been fine that morning, but now she was obviously affected by something. It was possible that she was merely sick, but she’d shown no symptoms only half an hour before. An external cause was therefore likely.

It was then that she spied a mushroom on the ground near the back porch. Not only that, it seemed to be partially chewed. She came closer and stared at it more intently.

Beginning scan… object is imprinted with toothmarks. Comparing pattern to observations of Granny Smith… match confirmed, 98% probability. Switching to chemical scan.

She bent down and “sniffed” it, taking in a sample of the chemicals it potentially contained.

Beginning spectrographic analysis… complete. Saliva detected; unknown chemical detected - composition is structurally similar to psilocybin.

Turing’s database on chemicals was quite extensive, but she had no idea what the effects of all those chemicals were. Still, it was possible, perhaps even reasonable, to assume that this strange mushroom might be the cause of Granny Smith’s current state.

She searched a bit further and found another mushroom that had likewise been partially chewed.

Beginning scan… object is likewise imprinted with toothmarks. Comparing pattern to Apple family members… bite pattern matches that of Applejack, 97% probability.

She went to the porch and found there was a bag of the mushrooms lying next to a rocking chair. However, there was no indication of where these strange mushrooms had come from.

She went through the back door and entered the kitchen. A note had been laid on the counter. Turing glanced at it:

Applejack & Family,
I picked these mushrooms with Tree Hugger, and she says they should be really yummy! I picked so many, so I’m sure you should be able to use them in some soup or recipes or something like that! Enjoy!
Your friend,
Fluttershy

Turing raised her head. If these mushrooms really were responsible for Granny Smith’s behavior, then it was possible that she was not the only one affected.

She dashed outside, snatching up the bag of mushrooms and running back to the front of the house. Big Mac had slung Granny Smith over his back, apparently in an effort to keep her from wandering around.

“Apple Bloom!” Granny Smith was saying to Apple Bloom.

“What is it, Granny?” the little filly asked, taking her grandmother’s hoof.

“Apple Bloom!”

“Y-yeah, Granny, I’m here.”

“Just… just listen,” she said, holding her free hoof to her mouth, shushing her. “I gotta ask ya somethin’.”

“Um… okay, what?”

“Do caterpillars know they’re gonna be butterflies one day,” she began, “or do they start buildin’ cocoons an’ go ‘What the buck am I doin’?’”

Apple Bloom groaned and rolled her eyes.

“They know.”

They all turned to face Turing Test.

“I am certain; I was a butterfly once.”

“Cooool!” Granny Smith said, her eyes lighting up. “Can ya teach me?!”

“Perhaps another time.” She turned to the other two. “Big McIntosh, Apple Bloom, I believe that I have identified the cause of Granny Smith’s condition.” She held up the bag of mushrooms.

“Ooh, careful now,” Granny Smith said, jutting a hoof at the bag. “Them things taste somethin’ awful!”

“Correction: now I am positive that they are the cause.”

“What?!” Apple Bloom cried, going to Turing’s side. “What do we do? What’s gonna happen to Granny?!”

“I am uncertain of any lasting effect beyond her mental state, but I suggest she be taken to the hospital. However, the situation is more serious than you suspect: both Applejack and Fluttershy may be affected as well.”

“Oh no!” Apple Bloom shouted, looking about frantically.

“Please remain calm,” Turing said, holding up a hoof. “Big McIntosh, as I am capable of traveling more quickly than most, I suggest that I take Granny Smith in a cart to Ponyville. You, meanwhile, should attempt to find Fluttershy and do the same for her.”

Big Mac nodded, passing a still-babbling Granny Smith to Turing.

“But… but what about Applejack?!” Apple Bloom demanded. “She might need help too!”

“I have not detected any sign of her being here at the moment. We will attend to the others first, then return to search for her. I will require your assistance, Apple Bloom.”

Apple Bloom opened her mouth to voice her protest but quickly saw the sense in what Turing was saying and closed it. That settled, they loaded Granny Smith into a cart, Turing taking the harness, and took off for Ponyville as Big Mac ran in the direction of Fluttershy’s cottage.

***

Apple Bloom hugged herself as she sat next to Turing Test just outside the examination room. She was quiet for long stretches of time until at last she heaved a long sigh.

“Are you all right, Apple Bloom?” Turing Test asked.

“No,” she whispered, but drew herself up. “I’m really worried about Granny an’ Applejack. Dr. Stable seems to think Granny’s all right, but just the same, I’ve never seen ‘er act like that. I mean, if Applejack really did eat one o’ those weird mushrooms, then… what if she tries to jump off the roof?”

She felt a heavy, metallic hoof on her shoulder and smiled up at Turing Test.

“Do you wish to leave to find Applejack now? We had previously agreed to see if perhaps Dr. Stable knew of an antidote before locating her.”

“Maybe,” Apple Bloom said, fidgeting in her seat. “But I’d feel bad about leavin’ before we knew if Granny Smith was okay.”

The door opened behind them, and Dr. Stable came out. Both Apple Bloom and Turing Test noted that he looked disheveled and had big red smooch marks all over his face.

“Well!” he said, adjusting his tie and ignoring Apple Bloom’s giggles. “The good news is that it seems Granny Smith will be fine.”

Apple Bloom let out a sigh of relief. “Thank goodness!” she exclaimed.

“We’ll need to keep her under observation until she comes out of this, but the toxin she ingested from those mushrooms simply needs to run its course. They are known colloquially as ‘Madcap Mushrooms.’ Antidotes do exist, but these mushrooms are not common to this region of Equestria, so unfortunately our little pharmacy has nothing in stock. Just the same, there shouldn’t be any lasting problem.”

“That’s good to hear!” Apple Bloom said, smiling at the good news. “Uh, about how long until she’s back to normal, Doctor?”

“Probably another six to eight hours.”

Apple Bloom gasped. “Six to eight hours?! But… but that means Applejack could be wanderin’ around somewhere like that all day!”

“Then I strongly suggest you go find her,” he said, adjusting his glasses. “However, you should exercise caution. These mushrooms can cause extreme reactions, and their effects can depend heavily on the victim’s mental state. Symptoms can include frightening hallucinations, paranoia, and even panic attacks. Please be wary, as Applejack may unintentionally injure you in the course of trying to retrieve or restrain her.”

“It is doubtful she will be able to injure me,” Turing Test said, placing a hoof to her metallic chest. “I will retrieve her.”

She looked down and saw Apple Bloom stroking her chin.

“Wait a minute,” Apple Bloom said, “if we could find her an’ cure her…”

“But Dr. Stable indicated that he does not possess the antidote.”

“Maybe not, Turing, but I know somepony who might!” Apple Bloom said, leaping to her hooves. She picked up the bag of mushrooms sitting nearby and gave them to Turing. “Come on, let’s head back to the farm, an’ we’ll go from there!” She turned to go but looked over at Dr. Stable. “Uh, sorry about Granny. Please take good care of ‘er, all right?”

“Not a problem,” Dr. Stable said, giving her a reassuring smile.

That said, the filly and the robot swiftly took off down the hall.

A moment later, Dr. Stable saw a very bedraggled Big McIntosh being trailed by a green mare with her reddish-orange mane in thick dreadlocks. He also noticed that Big Mac had Fluttershy completely tied up with rope and slung across his back.

“Ah,” Dr. Stable said, raising an eyebrow at the trio. “Mushrooms?”

“Eeyup,” Big Mac said calmly.

Fluttershy hissed at that.

“Whoa, whoa, mellow out, Fluttershy,” said the green mare, gently patting Fluttershy on the head. “Everything’s gonna be groovy.”

“Um, excuse me, Miss…”

“Oh, hey,” the mare said. “My name’s Tree Hugger. Blessings!”

“Um… you too?”

“Yeah, this is all my bad. See, like, I was picking mushrooms with Fluttershy here, but I totally got my mushrooms all mixed up. These can open up the doors of perception, but if you’re not ready, it can be a real drag.

“So, like, I came to give Fluttershy the right ones, but I found her at her place with this dude tying her up and I was like ‘Well, if that’s what you like, I’m cool with it,’ but then he got all--”

“Okay, okay, I get it!” Dr. Stable shouted.

“Whoa, no need to freak, doc,” Tree Hugger said, placing a hoof on his shoulder. “Anyway, I brought the right mushrooms and all, but, um… like, can I have the other ones back?”

“No,” he said flatly, and turned to Big Mac. “Mr. Apple, we should probably get Miss Fluttershy a bed and… wait, are you covered with… bite marks?”

Big Mac sighed. “Eeyup.”

“Oh, right,” Tree Hugger said, stifling a chuckle. “Fluttershy here was getting in touch with her inner fruit bat.”

Fluttershy hissed again.

Big Mac made a sour face as he stared evenly at Dr. Stable. “She thought I was an apple.”

***

Applejack crashed through the underbrush, barely noticing the small scratches and scrapes she received as she leaped at her attacker through a bush. Once again, her quarry was not there, though she could hear the taunting, synthetic laughter echoing out at her.

She wiped the sweat from her brow. It was so bright in the forest, a fact that momentarily struck her as odd. She paused to catch her breath as she felt her heartbeat rhythmically pounding in her ears.

She felt so odd. She was hot and tired, and she suddenly realized that she wasn’t sure how long she’d been out in the Everfree. An hour? Five minutes? All day?

“Wearing down?” the robot’s voice echoed out to her.

“Not on yer life!” Applejack shouted, raising her head, eyes darting around to find her quarry.

“You really are a terrible liar,” Turing’s voice said. “You should accept that you have lost. Your soft, weak body cannot take much more. If only you were forged from metal, like me, instead of stuck with that weak, aging sack of flesh and bone.”

“I’ll show you who’s weak!” Applejack shouted back, dashing off in the direction of the voice.

“Really? Then show me.”

There was movement behind her, and a putrid, sulfuric smell. She turned at the sound of something stepping out from the forest.

Three timberwolves.

The leader of the small pack growled at her, lowering its head.

But to Applejack, these were no mere ordinary timberwolves; these were made not of wood and leaves and vines, but of metal plates and gears and wires.

“So… brought out more robots, have ya?” Applejack said, laughing in spite of the thundering of her heart and the pit of dread in her stomach. She glared at the wolves. “Well, I’m not scared o’ these contraptions any more than I am of you!”

The wolves looked to each other. Their tactic of paralyzing their target with fear or letting it run away only to trip so it could be taken down was not working. This pony looked ready for a fight. The beta male whimpered.

“You are not afraid?” Turing’s voice called to her. “Then prove it.”

“I will!” Applejack shouted, and gave a guttural howl as she dashed right at the lead timberwolf. The hapless beast only had a moment to give a look of confusion before the crazed mare whirled around and kicked it with all her might, shattering it into a pile of sticks and thorns.

The other two wolves turned and ran rather than face such an opponent.

“Ha! I told ya!” Applejack shouted, looking up through the canopy of leaves with a triumphant smile. “Ya see that?! Ya can’t beat me! Ya can’t beat me!”

She broke into loud, long laughter.

“This is crazy.”

She froze. That voice. It sounded like hers, but she hadn’t spoken. Had she?

“Yer gonna be a hard worker someday, ain’tcha? Everypony’ll see.”

She gasped. That easygoing baritone voice was so clear, so warm, and so achingly familiar.

“D…” she whispered, barely daring to utter the word. “D-daddy?”

And then came the mechanical laughter.

“You!” she screamed, fighting back her tears. Somewhere in the shadows amid the trees, she saw the glowing violet eyes. “How dare you! How dare you!”

She charged after her tormenter once again. As she did, her hat caught on a branch, ripping it from her head as she obliviously ran deeper into the Everfree.

***

Turing Test followed closely behind as Apple Bloom galloped toward the farmhouse.

“Why have we returned here, Apple Bloom? Neither Applejack nor an antidote are likely to be found here.”

“You’ll see!” Apple Bloom said, looking over her shoulder and giving Turing Test a knowing wink.

They approached the farmhouse, and Apple Bloom halted by the back door. She put a hoof to her lips and gave a sharp, shrill whistle.

There was a clattering inside the house, and the screen door burst open as a blur of brown and white fur dashed over to her.

“Good girl, Winona!” Apple Bloom said, pushing the eager dog back slightly as she licked her face.

“I see. You intend to have your dog locate Applejack,” Turing Test said with an approving nod. “That is a sound strategy. Even my own abilities cannot compare with a canine’s olfactory sense.”

“An’ her sense o’ smell is good too!” Apple Bloom said. She turned back to the dog, who was panting and wagging her tail eagerly. “Okay, Winona, listen up! I need ya to find Applejack, ya hear? Go get Applejack!”

Winona barked and took off running in a straight line toward a hill overlooking the orchard. Apple Bloom and Turing Test followed her up the hill to an oak tree. Winona paused and began sniffing the ground.

“This tree,” Turing Test said, walking over to the mighty oak’s trunk, “appears to have some fractures in its bark. They appear to be recent and at least partially match the size and shape of Applejack’s hooves.”

Apple Bloom raised an eyebrow at that. “That’s weird. Why would Applejack go kickin’ an oak tree?”

Unfortunately, there was no time to consider the question as Winona suddenly took off again and they followed her down the hill, through the trees… and right to the edge of the Everfree Forest.

Winona slowed to a halt and sat down, letting out a soft whine as she put her ears back.

“Oh,” Apple Bloom said, her eyes widening. “Oh no… Applejack musta wandered into the Everfree Forest!”

“I have flown over the Everfree Forest and travelled through it to the Castle of the Two Sisters on one occasion, but it is my understanding that it can be potentially hazardous. In Applejack’s probable state of mind, she could potentially become injured or--”

“Don’t even talk like that!” Apple Bloom cried. She took a deep breath and hardened her gaze. “We’re goin’ to find her.”

Turing nodded. “Understood. However, it would be wise for us to remain close together for protection. My abilities should be sufficient to protect you and Winona from any wild predators.”

“All right,” the filly said. She then stroked Winona’s head and back as the little dog whimpered and looked from her to the Everfree. “I know it’s a scary place, Winona,” she said quietly, “but we gotta go. Applejack’s in there, okay? Come on now, we need ya to find her.”

At the word “Applejack,” Winona got to her paws. She gave one last glance at Apple Bloom and a short bark before she began to walk into the Everfree. The three of them stepped onto the path leading into the forest, following Winona as she periodically stopped to sniff the ground.

“Earlier you mentioned somepony who may possess an antidote, Apple Bloom. You have yet to specify who that could be.”

“Well, we just might be goin’ in the right direction to find her too,” Apple Bloom replied. “Ever met a zebra, Turing?”

“Negative. But I doubt she has met a robot either.”

“Good point, but if I know Zecora,” she said with a smile, “then I doubt it’ll give ‘er much trouble.”

***

A short while later, the two found themselves following Winona through yet another bush before stepping out into a clearing.

“Blech!” Apple Bloom said, brushing leaves and briars from her coat. “Applejack musta gone everywhere except the path by the way Winona’s trackin’ ‘er! I sure hope I don’t get poison ivy from doin’ this.”

“I hope I do not get it either.”

Apple Bloom blinked and glanced over at Turing.

“That was a joke. Ha ha.”

Apple Bloom rolled her eyes.

“My apologies. I am attempting to ‘lighten the mood.’ It seems I was not successful.”

“My mood’ll lighten when I find my sister,” Apple Bloom said. It was then that they both heard Winona barking frantically.

They followed the sound and spotted what she’d found. Lying on the ground beneath a low-hanging branch was Applejack’s familiar brown, wide-brimmed hat.

“Oh my gosh!” Apple Bloom cried. “Her hat! She never goes anywhere without it!”

She was reaching for it when she suddenly heard Winona bristle and growl, placing herself between Apple Bloom and the edge of the clearing.

“Winona? What the hay are ya--” Then she froze, sniffing the air and making a face. “Ugh! What is that?!”

Turing Test leaped in front of her just as a creature emerged from the woods. The wooden body had blended in with the surrounding flora, but the creature’s glowing green eyes made Apple Bloom’s blood run cold.

“Timberwolf!” she screamed.

“A curious creature,” Turing said calmly. “Is it classified as an animal or plant?”

“Never mind, Turing, run away before--”

The timberwolf snarled and pounced at Turing Test, latching its jaws onto her face.

“Turing!” Apple Bloom screamed.

The timberwolf tried to bite down as its prey remained motionless. However, its teeth could find no purchase in the tough, metallic creature before it. It let go, backing away in confusion from the strange pony, leaving a thin trail of drool across its face.

“I apologize, but I am inedible,” Turing said, staring at the timberwolf. “Please remove yourself from the premises, or I will deter you physically.”

The timberwolf stared back at her, cocking its head.

Turing dug into the earth, scooping out a large rock. She held it between her hooves. “Engaging E-Mode,” she said, then crushed the rock between her hooves into little more than fine powder.

The timberwolf got the hint and turned tail, dashing back into the forest.

“Turing, that was awesome!” Apple Bloom exclaimed, rushing over to her, hugging her foreleg. Then her eyes went wide. “But… wait, if timberwolves are around here… an’... an’ Applejack’s hat is here… oh. Oh, no…” She looked up at Turing Test, her eyes filling with tears. “Don’t tell me that s-she--”

“There is no need for alarm, Apple Bloom,” Turing Test said, holding up a hoof as she often saw Twilight Sparkle do when she wished for silence. “I did not detect any blood on the timberwolf’s teeth. Furthermore, it is unlikely that it would attack us if it was not hungry, indicating that it has not fed. Also,” she added, going to the center of the clearing, “I detect several impressions in the ground that match Applejack’s hooves. There are also several prints that match those of the timberwolves. While she may have confronted the creatures, it seems that she was victorious.”

“Oh thank goodness!” Apple Bloom said, wiping her eyes. “But… just the same, why would she run off an’ leave her hat like this?”

“I do not know. Perhaps, in her current state, she did not notice that it was missing.”

“Well, in any case, she’ll want it back,” Apple Bloom said, placing it on her head. Then she frowned as the large hat slipped over her eyes. “Uh, maybe you should carry it.”

Turing Test put on the hat, adjusting it around her hinged ears. She looked down at Apple Bloom, who gave her an approving nod.

“Is it aesthetically pleasing?”

“Yep! Lookin’ mighty fine, Turing.”

Turing raised her head. “Acknowledged: I am lookin’ mighty fine.”

There was a rustle in the bushes, and they all turned again to face the figure that emerged from the forest. Apple Bloom beamed when she saw who it was.

“A dog, a filly, and somepony strange,” Zecora said, eyeing the trio, “have ventured far from their home on the range.”

“Zecora!” Apple Bloom exclaimed. “Oh boy, am I glad to see you!”

“As am I, Apple Bloom, my dear. But tell me now, who is this here?” She pursed her lips as she came closer to Turing Test. “Forgive me if I seem unsettled, but who is this mare that’s forged of metal?”

“This here’s Turing Test, Zecora!” Apple Bloom said, gesturing to her. “She’s a robot!”

“That is correct,” Turing Test added. “I am a mechanical pony. I would be willing to explain further, but we are currently searching for Apple Bloom’s sister, Applejack. Apple Bloom has indicated that you may be able to assist us.”

Zecora raised her head. “Assist you, now? Please tell me how.”

“Applejack ate some funny mushroom, an’ now she’s gone all loopy!” Apple Bloom said. She took a mushroom from the bag they were carrying and showed it to Zecora, who gasped when she saw it.

“The Madcap Mushroom is known to me, but does not grow in Everfree.”

“Then… ya can’t help?” Apple Bloom said, her ears drooping.

Zecora smiled. “A cure does grow within these woods. But I must see if I’ve the goods. Come to my home, dear girl and bot, and I will see if so or not.”

***

Turing looked all around the little hut that Zecora called home. The masks and other decorations that hung on the walls were certainly a departure from what she had seen in her other friends’ homes, but she regarded them only with curiosity. After all, Zecora had only expressed mild surprise upon meeting her before readily allowing her into her home, which was certainly more accepting than most ponies tended to be.

Apple Bloom trailed Zecora and helped her retrieve various herbs and other ingredients as the zebra began mixing them in a bowl or crushing them with a mortar and pestle.

“Your knowledge of remedies appears to be very extensive,” Turing remarked as she sat by Zecora’s cauldron. “How did you attain your expertise?”

Zecora chuckled. “I traveled from my homeland dear, but kept its teachings very near. Roots and herbs and leaves and bark, found in day or in the dark; I knew their names since being a filly, and though some have thought it rather silly, my skills are not pedestrian, to those we deem Equestrian. Knowledge sought and swapped and learned, knowledge only fools would spurn! Delight in pain and illness lifted, by the cures that I have gifted. It is my joy and thus my drive, to help the ponyfolk to thrive.”

Turing tilted her head. “Oh.”

Apple Bloom smiled at Turing. “Zecora here can cure just about anything, Turing!” she said. “An’ it looks like she can help Applejack, Fluttershy, an’ Granny Smith!”

Zecora’s eyes widened, and then she frowned. “Alas, you did not say to me, that I should make a cure for three.”

Apple Bloom gasped. “Ya mean there ain’t enough?”

Zecora shook her head. “I have the herbs to cure just one. For more, I’ll need to make a run.”

Apple Bloom furrowed her brow but nodded. “Okay. Well, we’ll use this cure on Applejack, since she’s the one still wanderin’ around the woods. If it ain’t too much trouble, Zecora, we’d still like some fer Granny an’ Fluttershy.” She flashed Zecora her best puppy dog eyes.

Zecora smiled, nodding solemnly. “I’ll find those herbs and meet you here. Just take care and keep this near.” She held up the cure, which was a blue powder, and poured it from her bowl into a small bag. She tied it with drawstrings and then hung it around Apple Bloom’s neck.

“An’ this’ll help Applejack?” Apple Bloom asked, holding it out on her hoof.

“It works if eaten or inhaled, but do make sure you’re not assailed.” She narrowed her eyes. “The Madcap’s lies turn friends to strangers, and kindest aid to violent dangers. Watch well your sister’s state of mind, for you may find her quite unkind.”

Apple Bloom nodded. “All right, Zecora.” She then smiled and hugged her. “An’ thanks a lot fer all the help!”

Zecora smiled and turned to face Turing Test.

“Agreed,” Turing Test said, getting up from her seat. “I will now take Apple Bloom and Winona and continue searching for Applejack. Thank you for your assistance.”

Zecora pursed her lips and rubbed her chin. “Forgive me if you do not know them, but have you heard old tales of ‘golems’?”

“Affirmative. They have been mentioned to me.” She tilted her head. “They were mentioned as mythical automata created by a race known as the Yudacorns.”

“Ah,” Zecora said. “Forgive me if I seem uncouth, but I heard such tales in my youth. Ponies of stone with glowing eyes, made to walk and work and rise. But such a creature you are not; instead you call yourself ‘robot?’”

Turing nodded back to her. “It is the designation I have used for myself. Though I see the similarity in such a mythological figure, I am a creation of science, rather than magic.”

“I see,” Zecora replied. Then she chuckled to herself, flashing a smile. “As a foal I viewed such things with fear… but now that I can see you here, I see you’re not a cause for fright. For a machine, you’re quite polite!”

Turing bowed. “That is very kind of you to say. I hope that we may see each other under less perilous circumstances.”

That said, the group left the hut together, Zecora to find more herbs to make another batch of cures, and Turing Test and Apple Bloom to resume their search for Applejack.

It wasn’t long before Winona caught the scent once again.

***

After another twenty minutes, Apple Bloom was so focused on trailing the dog that she almost tripped over her when Winona finally stopped. She’d rounded a corner, and suddenly they were all greeted by blinding sunlight as the treeline broke.

“Whoa!” Apple Bloom cried as she skidded to a halt. Luckily, Turing Test put out a hoof, stopping her before she fell onto Winona.

“Are you all right, Apple Bloom?” Turing asked.

“Yeah,” Apple Bloom said, breathing heavily as she caught her breath. Then she looked up and saw where Winona had led them.

The area before them was a great expanse of pools of muddy water that bubbled and gurgled like soup coming to a boil. Apple Bloom wrinkled her nose at the sickly smell that rose from the bubbles as they burst. Lines of earthen walkways criss-crossed the area, which was dotted by reeds and cattail plants as well as the occasional stilted mangrove tree growing directly out of the water.

“A swamp?” Apple Bloom said, laying her ears back. “Why would she come here?”

“I do not know. However, I have recorded several geographical maps of Equestria, and I believe this area is identified as ‘Froggy Bottom Bog.’”

As if to punctuate her words, a large bullfrog leaped out the water, landing on a lily pad nearby the path in front of them. However, the frog gave a start when Winona began barking.

“Huh? What is it, girl?” Apple Bloom asked.

“I believe I know,” Turing said, pointing with her hoof.

Apple Bloom’s gaze followed where Turing was pointing, and on the horizon she spotted a familiar orange figure wandering along a path.

“Applejack!” she cried and started to dash forward. No sooner had she begun, however, than Winona bit on the end of her tail and tried to pull her back.

“Hey! Winona, stop it!” she yelled, yanking her tail free. The dog continued to bark, her ears back. She looked out at the bog and then back to the pair of them.

“It seems she does not wish to go into the bog, Apple Bloom.”

“She’s just bein’ a scaredy-dog,” she replied, rolling her eyes. “Fine. Winona, sit!”

The dog immediately sat, still eyeing her nervously.

“I’ll be fine, girl,” she said, patting her on the head. “Now stay put, ya hear? Stay!”

Winona looked like she was about to ignore the order and get up, but at last she laid her ears back and whimpered.

“All right then,” Apple Bloom said. “C’mon, Turing, let’s go get Applejack!” She placed her hoof on the small sack Zecora had tied around her neck.

Apple Bloom and Turing made their way out onto the earthen paths crossing the bog. For once, Turing had more difficulty keeping up with Apple Bloom as her hooves sank into the mud repeatedly, making it a little harder to follow the little filly than usual.

“Apple Bloom, I suggest we approach Applejack with caution,” Turing Test said quietly. “I am able to hear her from this distance. It seems that she is muttering somewhat incoherently.”

“Muttering? An’ whaddya mean ‘somewhat’ incoherently? What kinda stuff is she sayin’?”

Turing hesitated. “She appears to be upset with me.”

“With you?” Apple Bloom asked, slowing her pace as she looked back at Turing over her shoulder. “What for?”

“Unknown. Regardless, she may not be pleased to see me.”

“Well, you’ve got me with ya. Maybe I can calm her down.”

“That strategy might be effective. Still, it would be advisable to proceed with caution.”

“Right,” Apple Bloom said, her eyes narrowing with determination. “Don’t worry, I’ll get through to ‘er.”

They slowed their pace as they gingerly came up behind Applejack as she walked down an elevated path between two roiling, muddy pools. They could even hear her as she mumbled to herself, jerking her head left and right.

“Lousy machine… thinks she’s… can’t talk to me like… make ‘em proud, they’ll… they’ll all see…”

Apple Bloom took a breath. “Um, Applejack?” she asked slowly.

Her sister whirled around. Her mane was disheveled, and her eyes were dilated and glassy. “Apple Bloom? Wha… what’re you…” she began, but then her eyes refocused as she saw Turing Test standing next to Apple Bloom.

“Ah ha!” she shouted, pointing a hoof at her. “I finally found ya! Now gimme back my hat!”

Turing Test looked upward, noting that she was still wearing Applejack’s hat.

“Of course you may have it, Apple--”

“Nopony steals my hat!” she screamed, stomping her hooves.

Turing tilted her head at that. “I did not steal it, Applejack. Apple Bloom and I discovered it in the woods.”

“Liar!” Applejack shouted again. “You stole it after ya told me that you just wanted to replace me!”

Turing Test and Apple Bloom exchanged a confused look before turning back to Applejack.

“You said you’d be Apple Bloom an’ Big Mac’s new sister! Ya acted like you just wanted to help out an’ be friends, but it was all a lie!” She grit her teeth, snorting hot air through her nostrils like a wild bull. “You even sent yer robot wolves after me! Well, I showed you! Ain’t nopony, robot or otherwise, that can get the best o’ me!”

“Applejack, stop!” Apple Bloom cried. “Listen… we know ya ate a mushroom back at the house, but we found out it was some kinda poison mushroom! It’s makin’ ya see things!”

“Apple Bloom is correct. It also affected Granny Smith, and--”

“Quiet!” Applejack shouted. She looked at Apple Bloom, her gaze softening. “Now just relax, Apple Bloom. I know she musta told ya some cockamamie story about me, but it ain’t true. Now come over here by me, nice an’ slow. I’ll make sure she won’t hurt ya.”

Apple Bloom smacked her forehead. “Hurt me? Applejack, Turing Test ain’t done nothin’ bad to nopony! She’s my friend!”

Applejack gasped. “Sh-she’s… no! She ain’t--”

“Listen to yerself!” Apple Bloom shouted, a crack in her voice as she pleaded with her sister. “Stealin’ yer hat? Robot wolves? Come on, that’s crazy!”

Applejack stared back at her, her jaw slack as she panted. For a moment, she was quiet, and Apple Bloom smiled, thinking that perhaps she’d gotten through to her sister.

But Applejack saw the way Apple Bloom moved her neck and thought she heard a soft mechanical whirring. She saw her sister’s desperate eyes and thought she saw a faint purple glimmer behind them.

“No…” she whispered, tears forming in her eyes. Then she clenched her teeth, eyes aflame. “You monster! I see it now! Yer turnin’ my sister into a robot too!”

Apple Bloom groaned. “All right, that’s enough,” she said, rolling her eyes. “Turing, maybe we should just grab ‘er so we can--”

“I won’t let you!” Applejack screamed, and charged at Turing Test suddenly. “I’ll never let ya hurt her!”

Apple Bloom gasped and dove out of the way as Applejack rushed at Turing Test, aiming a hoof at her.

Turing Test merely hopped backward, avoiding the blow. This seemed to only infuriate Applejack even further, and she struck at her with her hooves, trying to land blow after blow as Turing Test slowly retreated.

“Applejack, please stop,” she said calmly, continuing to back away and dodging each hit. “I assure you that I have not harmed Apple Bloom.”

“Tell it to someone else, ya junkheap!” she snapped. She then whirled around and aimed her back legs at Turing Test. Mustering as much force as she could, she landed a mighty buck square into Turing’s jaw, a mighty clang ringing out over the bog. The hat Turing wore fluttered off her head and onto the ground.

Turing’s head was pushed back, but only slightly, the force barely enough to jerk her head in the opposite direction. With Applejack’s hooves still planted into her jaw, she slowly glanced back at the crazed mare. If she could heave a sigh, she would have.

“Applejack, assaulting me is pointless. I am--”

And then her back hooves slid backwards. She looked behind her and saw that her retreat had caused her to step onto unsteady, muddy ground. Applejack’s last blow had unbalanced her enough that she was beginning to slide down the embankment, toward the deep, muddy water below.

“Oh.”

She began to scramble to climb back up the embankment, but her prodigious weight caused her to sink into the mud; she could not gain a hoof-hold. Unless she did something quickly, she was going to fall.

Determining solution… P-Mode inadvisable, as jets require up to ten seconds to build sufficient thrust. Recommend seeking assistance.

She looked up and saw that the only one close enough was Applejack.

“Applejack, I am slipping. I require your assistance immediately!” she exclaimed.

But Applejack only wore a cocky grin. “Guess I ain’t obsolete yet,” she said. Then she leveled her hooves at Turing Test again and bucked her right in the chest.

Turing Test fell backward silently. She seemed to hang in the air for a moment before she tumbled off the embankment. Then gravity took over, and she plunged into the water, creating a massive splash as she sank like a stone into the muddy depths below.

To be continued...

Author's Notes:

Looks like that gal's got herself in some trouble now. Talk about bein' bogged down! She better hope some friendly seaponies are around to help her, or else she might be sleepin' with the crawdaddies.
(cough, cough)
Oh, sorry about that, everyone. I guess I left my "Dukes of Hazard" narration on. Well, sadly, that's the only reference you're going to get out of this chapter. But that just leaves more room to officially mention two more things:

One, this is the first chapter to feature new editing team member Reese and his contributions to the story. I personally asked him to join, and I'm very glad he accepted.

The other thing is that as of the day before posting this chapter, The Iron Horse: Everything's Better With Robots! has officially been inducted into The Goodfic Bin, your go-to repository for quality fics here on FiMfiction for over 30 years. (Give or take.) The story was approved by Architect Ironturtle, and his review of the story can be found here. Thanks a bunch, Mr. Ironturtle!

Overall, I'm really happy the story has had such a positive reception so far, and I'm grateful for everyone's support.

Apple Computer, Part 4

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“Turing, no!” Apple Bloom screamed, rushing over to the water’s edge. The murky water had settled and was now still and silent.

Applejack heaved a sigh and retrieved her hat, placing it back on her head. Ignoring Apple Bloom’s screams of protest, she swept up the little filly and hugged her tightly.

“Don’t you worry now,” she whispered, rocking back and forth as she held her. “Yer big sister’s gonna take care o’ ya. I’ll get Twilight to remove them robot parts from ya. That mechanical monster can’t hurt ya now, Apple Bloom.” She wore a tight, uneven smile, tears spilling from her eyes as she looked up at the sky.

Apple Bloom ceased her struggling and heaved a sigh. “Applejack?” she asked softly.

“Yes, Apple Bloom?” Applejack looked down at her. Her crazed eyes were still wide, unfocused.

Apple Bloom gently pulled open the small pouch around her neck. “I love you, Applejack,” she said. Then her eyes grew stern as she took hold of the pouch. “But snap out of it!”

She shoved the pouch into Applejack’s face, pressing the powdery blue contents right into her muzzle.

Applejack let go of her and stumbled back, coughing and shaking her head, trying to dislodge the pouch on the end of her muzzle. She shook it free and continued to cough as blue powder was smeared all over her nose and lips. She tasted the bitterness of the medicine on her tongue and felt it burn in her nostrils and throat.

But then, slowly, the brightness around her seemed to dim. The numbness of her cheeks faded. The lightheaded feeling that had persisted since she’d left the farm subsided. Presently, her head began to clear.

“Who the… what the… huh?” she asked, looking all around her. “How’d I get here? Wait, I was runnin’ through the woods, an’ then I…” She trailed off when she saw Apple Bloom looking up at her.

“Apple Bloom?” she asked. “What the hay are we doin’ out here?”

Apple Bloom heaved a sigh of relief. “Applejack, don’t ya remember? You ate some kind o’ weird mushroom an’ started seein’ things!”

“What?” she asked, cocking her head to the side. “That’s… I don’t remember that. I mean, I remember that you were there an’ Turing Test was there an’... an’ she was laughin’ at me…”

“Turing Test was never there!” Apple Bloom shouted, stomping her hoof. “You imagined the whole thing! Heck, I’m pretty sure Turing Test can’t even laugh!”

“But…” Applejack shook her head. “I… she took my hat?”

“Lost it in the dang woods,” Apple Bloom said, rolling her eyes. “Turing Test has been helpin’ me an’ Winona find ya all day! She was worried about you, same as me!”

Applejack blinked. “So… none o’ that was real?”

“No!” Apple Bloom shouted. “An’ what’s wrong with you, Applejack?! Why’d you treat Turing Test like that?! She’s been so nice to us an’ she never did a thing wrong to you, an’ then you went an’ did that to ‘er!”

Applejack blinked. “Did what now?”

“You bucked her into the water!”

Applejack’s eyes went wide. “What?!” She looked around and spotted where Turing’s hooves had dug into the embankment. “I did that? Oh my gosh, is she waterproof?!”

“I don’t know!” Apple Bloom shouted. “Oh no, poor Turing Test! W-what if she’s really in trouble, Applejack? She’s so heavy, I don’t think she can swim! She could be stuck down there!”

“All right, all right, just calm down, sugarcube!” Applejack said. She swallowed. “I’ll… I’ll fix this! First thing I’ll need to do is… wait, what is that sound?”

They both turned to see Winona scrambling over to them, barking her furry little head off.

“Winona?” Apple Bloom said, annoyance crossing her face. “I told you to stay, girl! Bad dog!”

Winona ignored the reprimand and seized Apple Bloom’s tail, growling and dragging her away from where she stood.

“Are you crazy, Winona?” Apple Bloom shouted. “Applejack, what’s gotten into her?”

Applejack blinked. Then she caught a whiff of the air and noticed that it had suddenly turned even more noxious than it had been before. Her eyes widened.

She recognized that smell.

“Apple Bloom, she’s tryin’ to warn us! We gotta--”

There was a bubbling sound from another nearby pool, and something began to emerge.

And then it kept emerging. Higher and higher the thing rose from the water, until its monstrous form blocked the afternoon sun. Greenish brown scaly skin, four long, serpentine necks, and a body the size of Town Hall stood before them.

The two ponies gawked, their blood running cold as four distinct faces glowered down at them.

“HYDRA!!” Applejack shouted, just as one of the heads roared and lunged at them.

Both she and Apple Bloom jumped out of the way as the massive creature snapped its jaws where they had been standing mere moments before. Applejack took off, Winona right beside her, looking back to see if Apple Bloom was following.

To her horror, she saw that Apple Bloom had gone in the opposite direction. Worse still, the monstrous hydra was following the little filly.

“Apple Bloom!” Applejack screamed, turning around to chase after them. She saw that Apple Bloom had turned toward the Everfree forest, but the hydra cut her off, kicking up a massive wave of water that washed over the path. Apple Bloom screamed, reversed direction, and instead made for a cliffside on the other end of the bog.

“Hey, leave ‘er alone!” Applejack shouted, chasing after the monster that pursued her sister. This had no effect; she could only watch in horror as it slowly got closer and closer to her, splashing through the bog and churning it up like a giant stewpot being stirred. Applejack even found a gap in the path before her and had to leap over it to avoid falling into the bog.

At last, Apple Bloom reached the cliffside, scrambling up a steep path and wedging herself into a small crack halfway up the rocky wall.

The hydra roared and tried to follow, but the crack was too small for it to reach in with its head. It bit and snapped and dug into the rock wall, trying to get at the little morsel inside.

Applejack’s heart nearly stopped as she heard Apple Bloom scream in terror. Then she swallowed and shouted, “Hang on, Apple Bloom! I’ll save ya!”

“Hurry!” Apple Bloom shouted back, her voice barely audible over the angry roars of the creature.

Applejack tapped her head, thinking of a solution. Deciding to try the simplest tactic, she scooped up a hoof full of mud and flung it at the beast. The mud ball splattered on the back of one of the creature’s heads, causing it to grunt and glare back at her.

“Yoohoo, big an’ ugly!” she said, dancing exaggeratedly at it. “Come an’ get me!”

The head that she’d pelted merely raised an eyebrow and turned back to the cliffside, continuing to pound it with the others, trying to smash it or at least widen the crack where Apple Bloom was hiding.

Applejack looked around for something else to use as Winona stood nearby, whimpering at her.

Then she spied a long vine hanging from one of the mangrove trees. She grabbed it with her teeth, pulling it free from the branches. It might not have been a real rope, but perhaps it would make a good substitute. In no time at all, she’d fashioned it into a makeshift lasso.

Twirling it in a big circle over her head, she tossed it, managing to loop it around the creature’s tail. She tightened the vine and yanked with all her might.

“Come on, now!” she growled, holding the vine tight in her teeth. “You leave ‘er alone!”

The hydra felt a tug on its tail, enough to cause a few more of its heads to look back. But it gave a grunt of mild annoyance and merely flicked its tail, yanking Applejack off her hooves and whipping her back in forth in the air until the lasso came loose and sent her flying through the air.

She gave a long yell as she tumbled head over hooves before landing in a muddy pool and sinking into the murky depths. She saw something out of the corner of her eye but paid it no mind as she swam back to the surface, paddling for the shore. Winona was there to greet her, licking her face and still whimpering. The loyal dog jerked her head over at the cliffside, where the hydra was still focused on Apple Bloom.

“I know, I know,” Applejack said, climbing out of the water. She coughed and shook herself, spraying water everywhere. She also noticed that her hat was missing again, not that it mattered right then.

What do I do now? she asked herself. That monster could eat poor Apple Bloom in one bite! Or me! How am I supposed to beat it all by myself? I need help! I need…

She blinked. And then she remembered the thing she’d seen below the water. Sure enough, she saw that she had been thrown back into the same pool where she’d kicked Turing Test in her hallucinatory state.

She saw that she was still wrapped up in her vine lasso and undid it, tying one end around a mangrove tree, the other around her waist.

“Let’s hope she ain’t too mad,” Applejack said. After a beat, she added, “Or dead.”

She jumped into the water, swimming with all her might to the bottom of the dark, murky pool. Just when it seemed as though the water had gone pitch black, she spied a glimmer. A violet glimmer. A pair of them.

It’s her! Applejack swam towards the glow. Soon she found herself face to face with the robot, who had sunk to the bottom of the pool but was apparently still able to walk along it.

Applejack undid the vine and pointed to it, then to Turing Test.

Turing Test nodded, the coils of her mane waving and floating in the water like some sort of seaweed. Applejack nearly laughed, finding the momentary scene almost charming.

Putting that aside, she gave the vine to Turing Test, who fastened it around her waist. Applejack then swam to the surface, emerging and taking a big gulp of air after holding her breath so long. She glanced at the hydra and saw it was still growling and scratching at the cliffside.

She still had time.

She went to the mangrove where she’d anchored the vine and began to pull. As she did so, she felt another tug and saw that Winona was helping too. She smiled down at her and dug in her hooves, pulling on the vine, which creaked and stretched and almost snapped but somehow held.

Eventually, Turing Test was slowly pulled from the water. Her hull and mane were dripping with mud and muck and algae as she finally crawled onto the surface.

“Turing!” Applejack cried. “Are you--”

Turing Test ejected a long, powerful stream of water through her nose, spraying it all over Applejack. Then she shook her head, letting the last droplets of water shake free from the holes in her faceplate.

Applejack wiped her face. “Well, guess yer all right.”

“Correct,” Turing Test replied. “I am mostly waterproof, but my faceplate is hollow. Fortunately, I am able to create suction between that area and my nasal intake system. This enabled me to eject the stream of water you are currently wiping from your face.”

Applejack raised an eyebrow. “Are you… holdin’ a grudge?”

Turing Test held out a hoof, tilting her head. “You tried to murder me.”

Applejack rubbed the back of her neck. “Uh, yeah. Look, it was the mushrooms, but I'm better now, and I’m sorry, but we don’t have time for this!” She pointed, and Turing Test followed her gaze to see the hydra chipping away at the cliff side.

“I hear Apple Bloom’s voice.”

“That monster’s got ‘er cornered!” Applejack shouted. “An’ I can’t save her on my own. So, I mean, I know yer probably sore at me, but--”

“I will assist you.”

Applejack jerked her head back. “Y-you will?

“Of course I will. Apple Bloom is my friend, and even if she was not, how could I let a pony come to harm when I am able to help?”

Applejack blinked at her. She somehow felt like she was seeing the mechanical mare for the first time.

“I have a strategy. I will distract the creature. While I am doing so, please rescue Apple Bloom and lead her to safety.”

Applejack’s jaw dropped. “What?! That thing’s a hundred times yer size! How’re you gonna--”

“Engaging P-Mode.” She sprouted wings and her jets roared to life. A moment later, she leaped into the air and flew directly at the towering beast.

“Welp, guess she’s got a plan,” Applejack said to herself. “C’mon, Winona! Let’s get Apple Bloom!”

The dog barked as they ran after the robot.

Inside the crack where she’d taken refuge, Apple Bloom shivered and held her forelegs over her head as the monster outside continually pounded at the entrance to her sanctuary. Slowly, bit by bit, it crumbled and widened. Soon it would be wide enough, and the creature would reach her, and then…

“Help me,” she whispered feebly, shutting her eyes.

But then her eyes opened again as she heard a strange rushing sound. It was growing louder very quickly. Even the hydra outside took notice, and the head nearest to her paused, raising an eyebrow in confusion.

Then a shining bolt from the blue shot in from the side and smashed into the hydra’s head, its eyes rolling back as the thing smashed into it.

In the moment of impact, Apple Bloom saw that Turing Test had flown directly into it at nearly top speed, her heavy metal body smashing into it like a cannonball.

“Turing Test!” Apple Bloom cried, her eyes lighting up as she jumped to her hooves.

The hydra outside roared as one of its heads was knocked unconscious and the strange metal thing began to circle and dive bomb it. Still, she wondered how her robotic friend had escaped from the bottom of the bog.

Then a familiar orange, freckled face peeked into the crack.

“Applejack!” Apple Bloom cried joyfully.

“No time to hang around here, sugarcube!” She beckoned with one hoof. “Come with me if ya wanna live!”

Apple Bloom went to her side. “But Applejack, how’d she get outta the water?”

“How do ya think?” Applejack asked, smirking at her. “Now come on, she’s keepin’ that overgrown varmint busy so we can get away!”

The two ponies and Winona scrambled down the cliffside and back across the bog, making their way for the Everfree Forest. Applejack brought up the rear, looking back over her shoulder.

Turing Test was still swooping, diving, and weaving through the remaining three heads. She suddenly swooped downward as one head snapped at her, only to fire her jets and rocket upwards to plant a hoof into another head’s jaw. The head reeled back and fell to the side limply, joining its unconscious counterpart. A second later, Turing rolled to the side, landing on the cliffside before springing off it and rocketing directly into another head, nailing it between the eyes, knocking that one out as well.

She’s amazin’, Applejack thought to herself. In no time flat, Turing had easily handled a beast that she couldn’t have taken on by herself on the best day of--

The hydra suddenly whirled around and whipped its tail at Turing Test, striking her and knocking her off course. She slowed down, trying to regain control, and the hydra seized its opportunity and snatched her up in its jaws. It tossed its head back and, with some obvious effort, it simply swallowed her whole.

“Turing Test!” Applejack screamed.

Apple Bloom and Winona also froze, the little filly’s face staring at the monster in horror.

But before Apple Bloom could even react, Applejack shouted in rage and dashed back towards the hydra. The girl could only stand there, awestruck, as Applejack rushed headlong back into danger.

“Hey, you!” she shouted at the monster, which was still making a face at the apparently foul-tasting meal it had just taken.

The hydra looked down at her, regarding her with curiosity and annoyance more than anything else.

“That’s right, you!” Applejack shouted, pawing at the muddy ground with her hoof as she stared at it with hardened eyes. “You already got three o’ yer heads knocked out! Care to try fer four? Because there ain’t no way I’m lettin’ you get away with eatin’ one o’ my friends! So either you cough her up, or I’m gonna wallop you like nopony ever walloped a monster before!”

The hydra gave a deafening roar and shot down at her, jaws wide as it prepared to snatch her up and swallow her.

Things seemed to slow down. Jaw set, she remained still, hearing Apple Bloom screaming in the distance, smelling the creature’s foul breath, and feeling the blood pounding in her ears. There was no fear, however, and no pain. There was just the moment, and she was going to wait for it.

When the creature was almost upon her, she leaped back, turning in midair, raising her hind legs. The creature crashed right behind her and looked up to see a pair of hooves aimed right at it.

With a bestial shout, Applejack bucked her back hooves into the hydra’s forehead, kicking it with every last ounce of strength she had. The sound of hooves hitting bone with a sharp crack resounded as the creature reeled back, head lolling and eyes askew before it finally collapsed limply to the ground, its entire body toppling over like a mountain collapsing and sending a wave of water throughout the bog.

In the aftermath, the bog grew strangely silent, until the sound of crickets and bullfrogs could be heard once again.

Panting, sweat dripping off her body, Applejack stood there on shaking, wobbly legs. Then she felt a jolt of pain in her hips and fell to her haunches, wincing at it.

“Applejack!” Apple Bloom cried, rushing up to her. “Are you all right?”

“Yeah,” she managed to say between gasps. “I’m… I’m all right. I just… I’m sorry that I…” She lowered her head. “Turing Test… if I hadn’t--”

She was cut off from this line of thought as one of the downed heads suddenly rose up, letting out a loud growl.

“N-no… no!” Applejack said. She tried to force herself to her hooves, but she felt utterly exhausted. There would be no escape this time.

As it turned out, there was no need. The head rose, but then it made a strange gagging sound. Its face turned green - well, more green than it already was - and a large lump suddenly went up its long neck. The head reeled back when the lump reached it, coughing and gagging before it finally vomited up a pony-sized metallic mass onto the earth before collapsing once again.

The metal thing stood up, still covered in digestive juices but otherwise apparently unharmed.

“Hello Applejack and Apple Bloom,” Turing Test said. “That was the second time I have been ingested. I can confidently report that it does not become more pleasant.”

“Turing Test, yer all right!” Apple Bloom cried, rushing over to her. But then she stopped before she could hug her, covering her nose with her hoof. “Ugh! An’ you could really use a shower!”

“I will take that under advisement, Apple Bloom.” She looked over at Applejack, who was still sitting before the head that she’d bucked. Turing pointed at the unconscious head. “Was that your doing, Applejack?”

“Eh heh heh… yeah, that was me,” she said, polishing a hoof on her chest.

Turing cocked her head. “But why? You were a sufficient distance from the hydra. Why did you return to confront it?”

Applejack blushed and looked away. “Well, you know…”

Turing’s ears shifted as Apple Bloom took on a smug look.

“I see. Perhaps we should return to a place of safety. Zecora may have the rest of the cure prepared by now. Also, I noticed she has a variety of natural cleaning supplies that may allow me to remove my offensive fragrance.”

“Sounds like a--gah!” Applejack said as she tried to get to her hooves and failed. “Ah, dang it…” She glanced at the pair of them, smiling sheepishly. “Uh, sorry to ask, but would y’all mind givin’ me a hoof?”

Turing Test went over to her, picked her up, and slung her across her back. “There is no need to ask.”

***

Back in Zecora’s hut, Applejack sighed contentedly as Apple Bloom rubbed a salve into her hips.

“Feel better, Applejack?” Apple Bloom asked.

“Yep,” she said, closing her eyes as she leaned over Zecora’s table. “Gotta say, Zecora, this stuff is the bee’s knees.”

Zecora was busy mixing up more of the antidote, having found the missing ingredients in the Everfree. She turned to smile over her shoulder, however. “I wish I had a cure for you, but at least I have that brew.”

Applejack nodded. Back when she’d first been diagnosed, she’d gone to Zecora for help. Unfortunately, it seemed that there were things even Zecora couldn’t cure.

There came the sound of metal hooves on wood as Turing Test emerged from Zecora’s back room, the mud and other gunk removed from her hull.

“I believe that I have sufficiently removed the offensive odor,” she said, looking to them. “Am I correct?”

Zecora chuckled. “You have the thanks of all of us; before you reeked like Tartarus!”

Apple Bloom and Applejack laughed at that.

Apple Bloom turned to face Zecora as she massaged the last of the salve into Applejack’s hip. “So, Zecora, ya think you’ve got enough o’ that stuff fer Granny an’ Fluttershy?”

Zecora nodded. “Just take the newest batch of powder. It shall block the Madcap’s power.”

“That’s good,” Applejack said, wiping her brow. “That dang mushroom made me see all kinds o’ crazy things! Sorry about all the trouble, by the way.”

Zecora frowned and put the pestle down gently. “Listen to me, Applejack, for it may get you back on track. The Madcap gives one potent visions, but they aren’t without precision. It calls forth thoughts within the mind, be they cruel or be they kind. The vision that gave you such unrest, was a fear of Turing Test.” She walked over to her, staring at her intently and causing her to squirm. “Speak your mind, and don’t be modest. You are known for being honest. Yet I think there’s something hidden, something strange and forbidden. Tell us now what gives you fear, of this robot we hold dear.”

Applejack’s eyes widened as she glanced from Zecora to Apple Bloom and finally to Turing Test. At last, her ears drooped and she lowered her head.

“All right,” she said. “I guess after that whole mess, I can’t really keep it in.”

“What is it, Applejack?” Apple Bloom asked, laying her hooves on Applejack’s shoulder. “Don’t tell me that after all this yer upset about acceptin’ help!”

Applejack shook her head vigorously. “Don’t be ridiculous!” she snapped. “It’s…” She closed her eyes, heaving a sigh. “Aw, fer Pete’s sake, where do I begin?”

She took a deep breath, letting it out slowly.

“Way back when I was just a little filly an’ you were just a baby, Apple Bloom, Pa used to watch me go out into the field an’ try to buck alongside him an’ Big Mac. I’d try to help even though I was too small to hold a hammer or even buck a single apple. An’ he used to say…”

She paused, drawing in a breath sharply.

“...He used to say ‘Yer gonna be a hard worker someday, ain’tcha? Everypony’ll see.’” She swallowed, her eyes already growing damp. “I remember that like it was yesterday. An’ I swore I’d prove him right. I grew up an’ worked my tail off in the fields, buckin’ an’ plowin’ an’ doin’ everything I could to prove that I was the hardest-workin’, most dependable pony in all o’ Ponyville! Maybe even all o’ Equestria!” She looked upward, her eyes bright.

“Everypony was so proud o’ me. You an’ Big Mac an’ Granny… I’d work twelve hours a day, no problem, an’ I’d provide fer the family. An’ every day, y’all would sing my praises an’ I’d just feel like I was the most special pony in the world!” She smiled, the memory of all the compliments and blessings she’d received coming to mind. “I felt like I was more’n just a farmer… I felt like somepony special.”

Then she blinked, her ears going back. “Then I… I got this danged case o’ Bucker’s Hips.” She heaved a sigh. “An’ suddenly I couldn’t work as much as I could. Those twelve hour days got harder an’ harder. The doctor told me I needed to cut back, let others take over, just… just stop worryin’ so much. But I do worry! Things are tight, tighter’n they should be, an’ just when the farm needs me, when the family needs me, my own body up an’ betrays me!”

She slammed her hooves on the table, startling them all.

“I see Granny Smith, just slowly makin’ her way across the farm. She had Bucker’s Hips a long time ago too. An’ she can’t buck no more either. An’ even though she had to quit when she was a lot older’n I am now, she was always more about bakin’ than she was about farmin’. An’ I look at her an’ I wonder, ‘How long’ll it be until that’s me?’ How long until everypony just says ‘Sit back, Applejack… just relax, an’ let us handle things?’”

She sniffled at that, the tears in her eyes growing larger. “I… I don’t wanna be some old lady,” she muttered, looking down at her hooves. “Not just yet, at least. I always thought I’d work my hooves to the nubs until I was old an’ gray… but now, I… I just don’t know anymore. How much longer do I got ‘fore I gotta retire? Before my body finally gives in? All this business has made me realize that I… I’m not in my prime no more; the best days o’ farmin’ in my life are gone.”

She shut her eyes, deep frown lines crossing her face. “An’ still I told myself that at least I’d be appreciated. Even if I had to slow things down, be a little more ordinary, at least I could take pride in knowin’ that my work would be like… like… I dunno, a monument or somethin’! I pushed my body to the limits fer my farm! An’ then…”

She opened her eyes and grit her teeth, her tears finally spilling over as she pointed at Turing Test. “An’ then you showed up!” she shouted. “I worked so hard to be the best dang farm pony there ever was, an’ then you come an’ do it all like it’s nothin’! An’ to you, it really is nothin’! My work was my life, an’ you can do everything I can do, only a thousand times better without so much as breakin’ a sweat, getting tired, or gettin’ hungry! Don’tcha know what it feels like to know that the best days o’ yer life are already behind ya, only to see somepony else come an’ make it look like none o’ it even mattered?!”

She sobbed, collapsing on the table. “An’ the worst part… the very worst part about it,” she managed to say, her voice breaking, “is that I can’t even be mad about it! When I saw them visions about you tauntin’ me, like you were some kind o’ monster, in a way I was relieved!” She let a wry laugh escape her. “Ya know why? Because it made it easier to hate you. But that ain’t the truth. The truth is that you were just tryin’ to help. You were bein’ kind an’ helpful, an’ you never meant any harm by it, an’ I couldn’t say nothin’ about it to anypony or else I’d just look like the jealous, foolish pony that I really am!”

She finally broke down, laying her head on the table, burying her face in her forelegs as she cried. Apple Bloom went to her side, holding her, crying as well.

Turing Test had stood there the entire time as Applejack had continued speaking. Now that Applejack had finished, she lowered her head.

“I am sorry, Applejack,” Turing Test said quietly. “But you are mistaken; I am not kind.”

Applejack looked up at her through tear-stained eyes.

“The truth is that I…” Turing Test looked away. “I knew that my actions were causing you pain.”

The group of them gave a start, staring at her.

“At first, I wished to assist you because I thought that it would make you happy. And yet it did not. I realized that you were resentful of my actions as I assumed responsibilities that you previously held.”

Applejack grit her teeth. “Why you… if you knew the whole time, then why the hay did you keep doin’ it?!”

Turing lowered her ears. “I experienced a new emotion, and I did not know how to identify it. Still, I felt compelled to continue to assist your family. However, I now believe I have identified the emotion.”

She turned to look at Applejack. “I experienced what I believe can be called envy.”

Applejack raised an eyebrow at that. “Envy? What have you got to be envious about?”

“Clarifying: I was envious of you, Applejack.”

She gasped. “What? What for?”

“When I assisted your family, they praised my actions. They welcomed me, talked to me, and treated me as a normal organic pony. It was as though I was one of them. It was as though I was part of your family.

“As you know, I was built, rather than born. I have no family. Robots have no mothers or fathers, and if there are other robots like me, they will likely not resemble me in their thinking, as my creators seem to regard me as a non-sentient being. These hypothetical robots may even prove hostile. It is for those reasons that I came to value being part of a family unit. It is a wonderful thing that you enjoy every day. And it is something that I will likely never experience.”

Applejack stared back at her in silence. She wiped her nose and waited for Turing Test to continue.

“I strongly desired the things that you had, Applejack. And that is why I continued to supplant you, even though I knew it was causing you pain. However, I did not realize the extent of your distress or how severely you were reacting. I am very sorry for hurting you; I have experienced sadness and anger before, and I regret that my actions have produced those emotions in you. I am ashamed of my selfishness and lack of consideration.”

She looked away for a moment, but then turned back to face her.

“However, Applejack, I believe that your perspective on the situation is flawed. You believe that my actions made your presence unnecessary, but the truth is that your contributions are more significant than you realize.”

Applejack raised an eyebrow at that. “What do you mean?” she asked slowly.

“You place a large value on your farm work, Applejack, believing that your status as an excessively hard-working farmer is what gives you greater distinction. In actuality, your significance is multifaceted.

“For instance, on the first day that I began working at Sweet Apple Acres, I had a conversation with Big McIntosh while the two of us were hauling in our carts of apples. It was after Granny Smith summoned you to stop early to avoid aggravating your injury. You seemed very agitated, so I said to your brother, ‘Applejack seems very intent on working despite her condition. It does not seem logical for her to risk further injury. Furthermore, she seems displeased with me, though I do not understand why.’

“He gave the following response…” She shifted her voice, and Applejack gave a start when she heard Big Mac’s voice come from Turing’s mouth, the sound of cart wheels rumbling in the background: “Now listen here, Turing Test. Applejack might get a little stubborn, but she means well. Ain’t nopony with a bigger heart than her. She’d give up her left legs fer this family, an’ probably the right ones too if she thought it would keep us from even a moment o’ pain or trouble. She’s just a little steamed that she can’t be out here helpin’ us with these apples. Please don’t think any less o’ my sister, ‘cause she’s one o’ the most important ponies in the world to me.”

Applejack smiled, putting a hoof to her chest.

“Two days ago,” Turing said, back in her own voice, “I was assisting Granny Smith in the kitchen. She praised the meticulousness and speed of my apple peeling and thanked me for my recent assistance with the family budget. I stated that I was glad to provide ‘a superior quality of assistance’.”

Applejack frowned at that, but listened as Turing continued to speak.

“Granny Smith paused in her pie making and turned to face me. She appeared agitated and said,” Turing’s voice changed again, this time to Granny Smith’s: “Well, I don’t know about ‘superior,’ Turing Test. Not that I ain’t glad fer the help, but Applejack does her best. She might make mistakes in ‘er mathematics sometimes, but she checks ‘em twice an’ keeps me on point. An’ maybe she ain’t the best baker, but that girl sure can knead dough when these ol’ hooves are sore. Plus, I don’t think I’ve ever met a pony that loves my apple fritters as much as she does, I can tell ya that much! An’ seein’ the way she appreciates it, well, that makes it all worthwhile.”

Turing paused for a moment, but Applejack heard chopping noises in the background and realized that this was part of what Turing had recorded, and that Granny Smith herself had gone quiet while they’d been talking. Then she heard her grandmother continue:

“Honestly, Turing, raisin’ three young ‘uns by myself at my age wasn’t no easy task. But Applejack never took it fer granted. Ya see, ever since her parents…”

Applejack stiffened, drawing Apple Bloom closer to her.

“...well, point is, she’s always wanted to be the pony o’ the household, an’ she was always tryin’ to help out an’ be an adult so I wouldn’t have to worry so much. Without her around, well… truth is, I don’t know what woulda happened to this farm if’n she hadn’t grown up so fast! I worry about ‘er sometimes, but just the same, she’s grown up into one o’ the finest young ponies I ever did see!” There was a chuckle, and then, “Oh, listen to me yammerin’ on about my grandkids. You don’t wanna hear all this, I’m sure. Pass me the cinnamon, will ya, dearie?”

Applejack smiled. “She really said all that?” she asked quietly.

Turing Test nodded. “Affirmative. And yesterday, while assisting Apple Bloom with her homework, she--”

Apple Bloom blushed, looking away. “Aw dang, not that!” she exclaimed.

Applejack raised an eyebrow. “What? What happened?”

Turing Test’s ears shifted. “Do you not wish me to continue, Apple Bloom?”

Apple Bloom glanced from Turing to Applejack, then back to the robot. She sighed in resignation. “Nah, it’s all right. Go on an’ tell ‘er, Turing Test. I think she needs to hear it.”

Turing Test nodded. “Acknowledged. I was assisting Apple Bloom with her homework, and she made the following remark:”

Turing Test then spoke in Apple Bloom’s voice: “You sure are good at these here math problems, Turing!”

Turing shifted back to her own voice. “I replied, ‘Thank you, Apple Bloom. Shall I continue to assist you with your homework in the future?’ Apple Bloom then appeared to consider the question before responding.”

She continued in Apple Bloom’s voice: “That’s mighty nice o’ ya, Turing, but maybe just sometimes. Truth is, I kinda like gettin’ help from Applejack, even if she’s not as fast as you. Ya know, Applejack’s the one that taught me all this math stuff in the first place! Well, I mean, Miss Cheerilee did, but I wasn’t gettin’ it. So every night fer a week, Applejack came to help me out. An’ I could see she was just about dead on ‘er hooves after harvestin’ all day, but she never complained and stayed up half the night just to help! See, she taught me fractions by bringin’ in apples cut up into halves, quarters, or whatever until I finally got it. Now, whenever I do ‘em, I just think about Applejack showin’ me all them apple slices! Plus she let me eat ‘em if I got the problems right.”

Both Applejack and Apple Bloom laughed at that.

“But the point is, much as I appreciate all the help, Turing, I never woulda come this far without Applejack. She’s… well, she’s the one who takes care o’ everything around here. She’s a hero an’ all, but it ain’t that stuff that makes her important. It’s that she takes care o’ me an’ Big Mac an’ Granny an’ anypony else that needs help. An’ it’s because o’ her that I know that no matter what my cutie mark turns out to be, I’m gonna use it to help other ponies, just like she does!”

Applejack’s lip quivered, and she looked down at Apple Bloom. “You really mean all that?” she asked quietly.

Apple Bloom was still blushing. “Yeah,” she replied, rubbing the back of her neck, “Sorry fer not sayin’ it to ya. It’s just kinda embarrassin’.”

Applejack’s eyes had again filled with tears, but this time she wore a smile on her face. She swept up Apple Bloom in a tight hug. “Aw, sugarcube,” she whispered as she held her, “don’t apologize. I’m just… I just never knew it all meant that much to ya.”

“I apologize if I caused you embarrassment, Applejack and Apple Bloom,” Turing Test said, causing them both to look up. “I merely wished to demonstrate to Applejack that she has significance beyond her capacity for hard work. Applejack, the things your family members told me about you make it obvious that you are precious to them in a way that I am not now and never will be, regardless of my abilities. You are important to your family by virtue of who you are and how you enrich their lives. You have worth that extends beyond the apples you can buck, the fields you can plow, and the number of hours you can work. I am capable of doing your work, but there is nothing I can do to replace you. You are irreplaceable.”

Applejack just stared at her, her grin spreading, before a sob escaped her. “I… I don’t know what to say, Turing Test,” she managed to say as she wiped her eyes. “Thank you so much fer tellin’ me all that. I guess I didn’t even know how much I needed to hear somepony say it.” She laughed as she tried to get herself under control. “Aw, fer cryin’ out loud, just look at me!”

“I am looking at you, and you are indeed crying out loud, Applejack.”

Applejack, Apple Bloom, and even Zecora chuckled at that.

Turing Test then bowed her head. “Applejack, I apologize for causing you distress. Though I did not realize the consequences of my actions, I will accept responsibility for hurting you, and I will not trouble you any further. I will take my leave of you and your family once we have delivered the cure. I will now wait outside until you are ready to depart.”

She made for the door when Applejack jumped up, blocking her way as she held up a hoof. “Whoa, now just hold on there, sugarcube,” she said, giving her a wry smile. “Now, don’t get me wrong: yer weird an’ talk crazier’n a seapony in a hard cider aquarium. Just the same, though, I think this is the first time since I got my diagnosis that I haven’t felt like yesterday’s apple cores.”

Turing Test’s ears shifted. “You think my method of speaking is eccentric?”

“I’ll ignore that,” Applejack said, rolling her eyes. “Point is… well… I’m tryin’ to say that I think I’m finally over it: the bad feelings that I’ve had, the fear, an’ all the resentment. Maybe we both got off on the wrong hoof, Turing Test. Maybe… well, heck, ain’t no maybe about it. Truth is, ya helped my family out, ya helped me out, an’ when I thought that hydra got ya, I nearly lost my mind. Yer a good pony an’, well, I’d be honored to have ya in my home…”

She heaved a sigh.

“Let’s start things over again. On the right hoof, this time!” She spat on her hoof and held it out. “Whaddya say, Turing Test? Wanna be friends? Fer real this time?”

Turing Test held up a hoof, looked at it, then looked over at Apple Bloom.

“Apple Bloom, I lack salivary glands. Will you please spit on my hoof so I may accept your sister’s offer?”

***

The three of them made their way back through the Everfree Forest alongside Winona. Applejack paused for a moment as she glanced back at Turing Test.

“Hey,” she said, shooting her a look.

“Yes, Applejack?” Turing Test asked.

“I know ya said that you ain’t got a family, least not one like mine. Now, that may be true, but I want ya to know somethin’,” she said, going over to her. She put her hoof on Turing’s shoulder. “There’s more to family than just who yer Ma an Pa or brother or sister are. Family’s about who cares for ya, who depends on ya or who you depend on in return, an’ most of all, it’s about the ones who raised ya like one o’ their own.”

Turing glanced down at Applejack’s hoof, then back to her.

“Just lettin’ ya know,” she said, flashing a grin, “in case you decide that maybe you’ve got a family after all.”

She let her go, leaving Turing Test to contemplate her words in silence. After a moment’s consideration, she trotted after her, making her way back towards Ponyville.

***

It was another two days before Twilight Sparkle and Spike finally returned home. When they arrived, groaning and grumbling after days on their hooves and claws, respectively, they just wanted to go to bed and collapse.

And yet, when they opened the door, they found Turing Test sitting there.

“Oh, hello, Turing!” Twilight said, gazing up at her through darkened, puffy eyes. “Did you have a nice time with Applejack and her family?”

“Affirmative. I am also happy to report that I was able to make friends with her.”

Twilight smiled, but then let out a long yawn. “I’d love to hear about that,” she said, rubbing her eyes, “but maybe that can wait until tomorrow…”

She began to walk by Turing Test when suddenly the robot embraced her, laying her head on her shoulder. She also reached over and brought Spike into the hug. Both Twilight and Spike exchanged a look, surprised at this sudden display of affection.

“Uh, Turing Test?” Twilight chuckled, her eyes shifting nervously. “Is everything all right?”

Turing loosened her grip backing away slightly. “I have learned that a display of affection,” she explained, “is a common way to welcome the return of one’s… family. Twilight Sparkle and Spike the Dragon, are you not my family?”

Twilight smiled, as did Spike, as they returned the hug. “Heh… right you are, Turing Test,” Twilight said, holding her close. “We’re your family now.”

To be continued...

Author's Notes:

Achievement Unlocked: "Firing on all Sixes":
Befriend the Mane 6 - (6/6)

Well, that's it for the Applejack arc! I hope y'all have enjoyed it. There's still more of the story left, though, so I hope you'll look forward to it in the near future!

References:

-Just the one! Applejack telling Applebloom "Come with me if ya wanna live!" is a pretty obvious reference to The Terminator series of movies.

If you haven't read it, by the way, this is probably about where the holiday special The Iron Ho-Ho-Horse: Everything's Merrier With Robots! would occur. It's not required reading, of course, but if you'd like a little holiday cheer in the off season, then feel free to enjoy it. Or hate it if you're a real Scrooge.

Also, for some behind-the-scenes stuff, here's a blog with some deleted concepts for this arc!

Human After All

View Online

Author's Notes:

Hey folks, just letting you know that this chapter was originally uploaded as an April Fool's joke chapter. In other words, it's a non-canon bit of silliness that isn't part of the story. If you're up for that, please enjoy it. If not, feel free to skip over it and go to the next chapter, provided it's been uploaded. Thanks for indulging me!

Anyway, the title is another in a long line of Daft Punk references. It was too perfect to not use it.

I still might do a real Equestria Girls side story, but I couldn't resist the chance to have a little fun with the idea. Hope you're not too mad, and much love to my illustrator for coming up with the illustration so quickly after the turnaround on the last chapter.

UPDATE: ...Oh, wait, I actually did do an EQG story. The real "Human After All" can be found here, but be warned: it takes place after this story. Thar be spoilers, matey.

See you next time!

Turing Test trotted into one of the many rooms of the castle and found Twilight hunched over a book, eagerly scribbling something onto the page. More noticeable, of course, was the huge mass of machinery in the center of the room. Plugs and wires and Luna’s Ladders and numerous other gadgets were all hooked together. And in the center of it all was a tall, oval mirror.

“Twilight Sparkle, you wished to see me?” Turing Test asked.

Twilight glanced up from her writing. “Oh, you’re here!” she replied, smiling at her. She turned to the book again, her quill continuing to scribble as she held it with her magic. “Just a moment, Turing. I’m finishing writing a message to my friend.”

Turing cocked her head at that. “A message? That is a book, Twilight Sparkle. Perhaps you should exercise more brevity for the sake of your friend.”

Twilight chuckled at that. “No, Turing. This book is a magic tome linked to another book that my friend has. When I write a message in it, she can see it, and vice-versa!”

“That is a very useful creation. Are such books common?”

Twilight paused. “Um, no, actually.”

“That is regrettable. The ability to instantaneously send messages to another instantly would be of great benefit to Equestrian society.”

Twilight glanced up from her book, blinked, then turned back to it. “I guess you have a point, Turing. It sort of makes you wonder why they aren’t everywhere.”

“It would be preferable to having Spike the Dragon expel Princess Celestia’s letters from his mouth by belching. You should inform Gadget of this medium. It might cause her to cease her inquiries about the communicative properties of his other orifices.”

Twilight rolled her eyes. “I think Spike and I would both appreciate that.”

She finished her writing and closed her book.

“Okay, then! Well, Turing, I just finished sending a message to my friend Sunset Shimmer! She’s going to help us do a little research!”

Turing Test’s ears lifted. “Research? On what subject?”

“I’m glad you asked!” Twilight said, walking over to the machinery around the mirror. “Sunset Shimmer was once a student of Princess Celestia, just like I am! Or, um, was. Anyway, the point is that she actually lives in a different world that can be accessed through this mirror!”

She pointed a hoof at the mirror, smiling brightly at Turing Test.

“Another world? Do you mean that she now resides in an alternate version of Equestria?”

“No, that’s a different mirror.”

“Such a mirror exists? Where is it?”

“Eh, it’s canon to the comics, don’t worry about it,” Twilight said, waving a hoof. “Look the point is, Sunset lives in a strange world where ponies are not the dominant life form. Instead, tall, two-legged simian creatures called ‘humans’ run everything! And when ponies go through the mirror, they transform into humans themselves! Spike and I have been a few times.”

“Spike the Dragon is a dragon. They also become humans?”

“Oh, no, Spike becomes a dog.”

Turing tilted her head. “What would occur if a dog, such as Applejack’s pet Winona, were to travel through the mirror?”

Twilight opened her mouth, froze, and finally shut it, rubbing her chin. “Huh. Good question…” She shook her head, putting it out of mind. “Look, the point is that humans don’t appear to use magic or anything like that. Instead, they have extremely advanced technology. The computer that Dr. Turing was working on here in Equestria is incredibly outdated and slow compared to human computers. They even have these tiny devices you can carry in your hand--”

“Hoof.”

“No, no, humans have hands.”

“That is interesting. I must inform my friend Lyra.”

“No, Turing, you can’t!” Twilight cried, dashing over to her. “We can’t let anypony outside our group of friends know about this! If human technology got into the hooves of the wrong ponies, it could be disastrous!”

Turing bowed her head. “Understood. I will not reveal this information to anypony.”

Twilight breathed a sigh of relief. “Glad to hear it.” She cleared her throat. “Anyway, the point is that humans have such amazing technology, and I wonder if maybe they have anything comparable to you!”

Turing Test’s eyes momentarily contracted and she put a hoof to her chest. “You are indicating that other robots may exist in that world? Twilight Sparkle, that would be incredible. I would like to meet them and discuss our mutual experiences as artificial life forms.”

Twilight’s expression grew serious. “Uh, I’m not actually sure if robots exist over there. But I wonder… you’re so advanced, Turing, that nothing in Equestria compares to you. It’s a long shot, but it’s possible that you could be based on human technology that somehow found its way to Equestria.”

Turing was silent, not reacting to this information in the slightest at first. Then, slowly, she turned to the mirror, staring at it. “Technology from another world? You believe that my origins may not be Equestrian in nature?”

“It’s possible, but I don’t see how the technology could have made it here unless it came through this mirror.” Twilight frowned, furrowing her brow. “Unless there’s another way into the human world that we don’t know about.”

She sighed, but offered Turing Test a smile. “Enough talk. Turing Test, I’m going to meet Sunset Shimmer over there in just a few minutes. I’m not sure what will happen, but if you’d like to come with me, I’d like you to meet her as well.”

Turing tapped her chin, her ears shifting as she thought that over. At last, she replied, “I cannot let the opportunity to investigate a possible origin pass me by. I will accompany you.”

“Wonderful!” Twilight exclaimed, clapping her hooves together. “Then let’s get going!”

That said, she placed her magical journal on the pedestal above the mirror and turned the devices on. The machinery began to move, the energy from the book diffusing through the wires and bulbs, until at last the mirror lit up, the reflective properties giving way to a strange, swirling portal.

“It’s ready!” Twilight exclaimed. “Come on, Turing, follow me!”

Without another word, she leaped into the portal, Turing Test following right behind her.

There was the usual sickening lurch as she traversed the distance between her world and the next, but then she felt her body shift as she stepped through it and into the fresh air outside Canterlot High.

She felt her hind legs, now her only legs, carry her as she stepped forward to catch herself. The momentum from the portal could sometimes be tricky, but she was getting progressively better at coping with it.

“Whew!” she said, standing to her full height. “I’ll never quite get used to that!”

She stretched out her arms, wiggling her fingers. She chuckled at them, as they still struck her as odd. Still, they had their uses, even if she wasn’t perfect at using them. Perhaps Turing Test would have more luck with her new appendages.

She heard a clattering behind her and gasped, her eyes lighting up with glee. At last, she was going to see what Turing Test looked like as a human! She whirled around.

There was nothing in front of her but thin air and the portal back to Equestria.

“Turing?” Twilight asked, looking to the left and right, but only seeing the front lawn of Canterlot High and the black pavement of the human street before her. “Turing, where are you?”

“I am here, Twilight Sparkle.”

Twilight immediately glanced down at the voice. She gawked, her jaw dropping and her voice catching in her throat.

“T...Turing?!” she managed to say.

At her feet was not a robot, but a toaster with purple eyes and a tuft of polymer coils for a tail balanced on four nubby feet.

“Hello, Twilight Sparkle. Would you like some breakfast?”

“Turing Test?!” Twilight shouted.

“Negative. I am now designated as ‘Turing Toast.’ Warning: Primary directive ‘Make friends,’ has been altered. Primary directive is now ‘Make toast.’”

“Toast?”

“Understood. Please insert bread.”

“No, I mean… gah, never mind!”

Just then, the sound of footsteps was heard and a red and yellow-haired girl ran over to them.

“Twilight!” Sunset exclaimed, throwing her arms around Twilight. “I’m so glad you’re here!”

“So am I, Sunset!” Twilight said, returning the hug. “Well, mostly.”

“Mostly?” Sunset asked, raising an eyebrow as she pulled away. “How so? And where’s your friend, Turing Test?”

“Turing Toast.”

Sunset glanced down, her eyes going wide as Twilight smacked her own forehead.

“That’s the amazing robot you were telling me about?!”

“She didn’t used to be a toaster!”

“Well, what the heck are we supposed to do with her now?!” Sunset demanded.

“I will tell you what you’re supposed to do,” Turing replied. “Put some bread in me and we can get this party started. Come, my friends, who wants to get toasted?”

Sunset’s eye twitched, but at last she heaved a sigh. “Well… I think they sell Pop Tarts in the cafeteria.”

Turing was quiet for a moment, but then her voice turned icy. “Bch, did I tell you my name is Turing ‘Tart?’ No, I did not think so.”

Twilight picked up her toasty friend and gave an apologetic look to Sunset Shimmer. “I’m so sorry for all this, Sunset.”

But Sunset Shimmer just smiled. “Aw, don’t worry about it, sexy. It’s not like any of this is canon.”

Twilight rolled her eyes. “Tell me about it!”

HAPPY APRIL FOOL’S FOAL’S DAY, FOLKS!

Love Machine, Part 1

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Author's Pre-note: This arc makes a few oblique references to the holiday side story "The Iron Ho-Ho-Horse: Everything's Merrier With Robots!" It is canon, but not required reading, so you can skip it with very few issues.

The train pulled into the station at the Crystal Empire. Twilight had been there a mere month ago to discuss negotiations with Yakyakistan, but this trip was not for diplomacy; it was just for her.

Twilight smiled as she looked out the window and saw a familiar stallion standing on the platform. She eagerly galloped to the exit and leaped out to where Shining Armor was waiting with open hooves.

“Twily!” he exclaimed, greeting his little sister. “I’m so glad you’re--oof!” he grunted as Twilight practically tackled him with a hug. “Heh. I’m glad you’re here, little sister.”

“Me too!” she laughed. “Especially when I’m not terrified of saying the wrong thing to Prince Rutherford!”

There was the sound of whirring gears and metallic hooves loudly trotting across the crystalline floor of the platform. Twilight and Shining Armor both turned to see Turing Test exiting the train. Right behind her was Spike, who waved to Shining Armor as soon as he saw him.

“Hello again, Shining Armor,” Turing Test said, bowing her head to him.

“Good to see you again, Turing Test!” Shining Armor replied, giving her a smile. He turned to Spike and held out a hoof. “And hey, Spike, good to have you too, little guy!”

“Same here!” he said, making a fist and bumping it to Shining Armor’s hoof.

Twilight sighed. “I wish I had been here when you and my brother first met back on Hearth’s Warming Eve, Turing.” Then she perked up. “But hey, now you can pay a proper visit without trying to collect holiday cards and stuff from the whole Empire!”

“That is true.” She turned to face Shining Armor again. “I look forward to interacting with you and Princess Cadance during our visit.”

“Likewise!” he said, not missing a beat. He gestured for them to follow him as they made their way toward the palace at the center of the Empire.

Twilight smiled as she and the others walked along the crystalline roads, the crystal ponies all nodding, bowing, or curtseying to their prince, to her, and to their national hero, Spike. But what also struck her was the fact that nopony seemed to be even slightly bothered by Turing Test.

“It seems like you made a real impression on the crystal ponies, Turing,” she whispered over her shoulder.

“Affirmative. Though they were at first very apprehensive, especially the palace guards, Shining Armor vouched for me. He was made aware of me by means of your letters and allowed me to speak. When I informed the crystal ponies that I was visiting on your behalf, and especially on behalf of Spike the Dragon, they no longer feared me. Apparently, any friend of Spike the Dragon’s is a friend of the Crystal Empire.”

Spike puffed his chest out at that.

However, Turing’s ears began to twitch. “Shining Armor, I have an inquiry.”

“Oh yeah?” he asked, still leading the group. “What is it?”

“An inquiry is a question.”

He grunted as Twilight and Spike chuckled.

“I mean, what is your question?”

“An ‘empire’ is defined as a major political unit having a territory of great extent or a number of territories or peoples under a single sovereign authority. However, the Crystal Empire is smaller in size than Canterlot or Manehattan. Nor are you and Princess Cadance addressed as ‘Emperor’ and ‘Empress,’ respectively. Why then is this region referred to as an ‘Empire?’”

Shining chuckled. “You know, Cadance and I wondered about that and asked the crystal ponies that same question. Turns out, they don’t really know either!”

“Weird!” Spike remarked. “Eh, but no big deal. It has a nice ring to it anyway!”

“Speaking of Cadance,” Twilight said, frowning slightly, “is she okay?”

Shining Armor just smiled. “Cadance is fine,” he assured her. “But don’t be too surprised when you see her. She’s really starting to show!”

Turing Test tilted her head. “Please clarify. What is she showing?”

The others all laughed at that.

“Oh, Turing,” Twilight said, turning to smile at her, “you know that Cadance is pregnant! I told you, remember?”

“I do. I am not susceptible to forgetting information. However, I still do not understand your meaning.”

Twilight sighed and glanced over to Shining Armor. She gave him a pointed look, but he only laughed in response.

“I think you’ll understand what we mean when you see her, Turing,” he said raising an eyebrow as he smirked.

When the group arrived at the entrance to the colossal palace, Cadance was there to greet them. “Oh, Twilight, Spike, Turing Test, you’re here!” She came over and hugged each of them in turn. “How was your trip?”

“It was fine!” Twilight said.

Spike was rubbing his arms. “Still pretty cold, though.”

“Oh, yes,” Cadance said, nodding. “It gets very cold here in the Crystal Empire, of course, even with the Crystal Heart keeping it hospitable!” She beckoned them to follow her, the palace guards lining up on either side of them to form a pathway. “Come inside! We’ll get you warm and get you all a nice dinner! And there might be some tasty gemstones in store for you, Spike,” she added.

The group all followed her, but Turing, seeing Cadance’s profile as she turned, momentarily stopped in her tracks.

Turing checked her data, just to confirm what she’d noticed. Cadance’s abdomen was definitely protruding more than it had been previously.

Twilight and Shining Armor’s meaning finally clicked when she considered what they’d said.

“Oh,” she said to herself, quietly. She then picked up her hooves and caught up to the rest of the group.

***

It was later that night after everyone had gone to bed after a long evening involving a nice dinner, staying up late telling stories, swapping jokes, and just enjoying each other’s company. Cadance suddenly jolted awake, the tiny thing in her belly stirring slightly. She clutched her stomach and noticed Shining Armor had draped his foreleg over her during the night.

She smiled, gently lifting his foreleg as she slipped out of bed. She knelt down and kissed him on the forehead. He moved slightly, his slow, rhythmic breathing momentarily interrupted as he inhaled, but then he settled once more.

Cadance took a nightgown, then gently made her way through the halls of the palace. The guards on duty looked up from their posts when they saw her, but at a reassuring nod and a smile, they relaxed, letting her be.

After ascending a few flights of stairs, she at last reached her favorite balcony. She pulled her nightgown around herself more tightly in the chilly air as she stared out over her kingdom. The homes below were mostly dark, but with the bright moon overhead, the Crystal Empire shone and glimmered as if mimicking the starry sky above.

Her ears raised as she heard a distinct sound approaching behind her, along with a telltale purple glow. She turned to smile at her guest.

“Good evening, Turing Test,” Cadance said softly.

“And to you also, Princess Cadance.”

Cadance held up a hoof and clicked her tongue as if she were a teacher correcting a student.

“Please, Turing. Just Cadance.”

Turing nodded. “Acknowledged. Good evening, Cadance. I apologize if I am bothering you, but I saw you as I was exploring the castle.”

“Oh?” Cadance asked, raising an eyebrow. “Why are you exploring it at this hour? Couldn’t you sl-- oh, right.” She chuckled nervously. “Sorry, I keep forgetting that you’re… um…”

“It is all right, Cadance. Many of my friends often forget that I do not have the same needs or routines as organics.”

Cadance frowned. “That must get old.”

“‘Get old?’ If you are indicating that such questions are bothersome to me, then that is not correct. In actuality, while I formerly had no reaction to such assumptions, I now find them pleasant.”

Cadance’s eyes widened at that. “Pleasant? Forgive me for asking, but why?”

“Because,” she replied, coming over to stand beside her, “in a small way, it means they regard me as if I really were organic, rather than mechanical. They do not treat me differently, and I am appreciative of that.”

At that, Cadance smiled. She looked back out at the Crystal Empire. “It’s beautiful up here, isn’t it?”

Turing’s ears shifted. “I am told that many ponies find the night sky beautiful. I have difficulty appreciating aesthetic visual appeal, though I realize that it is important to others. It is why I am grateful to my friend Rarity for the brooches that adorn my legs.” She held up a foreleg, displaying it for Cadance.

“They’re lovely, Turing,” Cadance replied. She sighed and rested her forelegs on the rail of the balcony. “Still, I guess even I can’t quite explain why I like it so much up here, but just the same, I feel peaceful when I’m up here alone. It helps me relax and think. In fact, I’ve been coming up here a lot, lately.”

She took a deep breath and let it out slowly, resting her head on her forelegs.

Turing watched her and rested her forelegs on the balcony in turn, mimicking Cadance’s action.

Cadance laughed at that. “Twilight said you’re trying to learn about body language more.”

“Correct. I have had some success replicating some physical movements. However, I still have difficulty with vocalizations such as natural-sounding laughter or sighing. Attempting sigh in 3… 2… 1…” She raised her head. “Haaaaaaaaaa,” she ‘sighed.’

Cadance broke out into a fit of giggles, covering her mouth as she tried to contain it.

“I see,” Turing said, her ears lowering. “I was not successful.”

“No, no, it was fine!” Cadance managed to say through her giggle fit. “I’m sorry for laughing; I just thought it was cute!”

“Cute?” Turing repeated, raising her head. “That was not my intention, but it may be desirable nonetheless. Is being ‘cute’ considered a positive trait?”

Cadance smiled, managing to keep herself from laughing this time. “Yes, Turing. Being cute can be an asset. So can being, um, ‘aesthetically pleasing,’ as you put it. Or being funny, or being smart, or just being sweet. I remember that about Shining Armor.” She sighed happily, resting her face on her hooves. “He was a lot shier back in school, but so kind and devoted. He’s more brave now, but he’s otherwise just the same. And I still love him for it.”

Turing said nothing, but her ears twitched slightly on their hinges.

“And now,” she said, looking up at the sky, her smile growing wider, “I’m even going to have a baby with him! I’m… I’m going to be a mother…”

Turing saw that her eyes were wet, and she went to her side. “Cadance, are you all right? Why are you crying?”

“Oh, I’m sorry,” she said, wiping her eyes as she chuckled lightly. “I’m just a little emotional. These pregnancy hormones can be rough!”

Turing relaxed slightly, but she held her gaze on Cadance.

“I apologize, Cadance, but may I ask you a question?”

“Yes, of course,” Cadance replied, smiling at her.

“You refer to Shining Armor with very strong affection, stating your love for him. I have also been told that you are known as the ‘Princess of Love,’ similar to how Twilight Sparkle is the ‘Princess of Friendship.’”

Cadance nodded. “Yes, that’s true. Um, was that your question?”

Turing shook her head. “I am merely stating that information as justification for asking you what may be a difficult inquiry.” She leaned in close to Cadance. “I wish to know, what is love?”

Cadance blinked. “What is love?” she repeated.

Turing nodded.

“Well…” She paused, scratching her temple. “That’s a more complicated answer than you might think, Turing.” Then she brightened. “Oh, I know! Why don’t you tell me what you already know, and then I can add to that!”

“Acknowledged. That sounds efficient.” She tapped her chin, then proceeded. “From my own understanding, love is similar to affection, but more intense and multifaceted. Many books seem to focus on courtship and conclude once characters either acknowledge their love, establish a relationship by overcoming hindrances, or die.” She paused a moment as Cadance made a face. “I find the final result to be somewhat counterproductive.”

Cadance sighed. “Well, you’ve got the right idea, Turing,” she said. “Love is a lot like affection, but, just like you said, it’s so much more! It’s a wonderful, amazing experience that just, well, makes life so much sweeter!”

Turing nodded but said nothing as she waited for Cadance to continue.

“Well, love is something that anypony can feel, but there are all kinds of love, too.”

Turing sat up straight at that. “I was not aware that an emotion could have different subcategories.”

Cadance chuckled at that. “Well, love is a special emotion. When you feel love for your family, that’s what we call ‘familial love,’” she explained. “When it’s for your friends or companions, we call it ‘platonic love.’ And when it’s for that special somepony who you want to be with, like in those books you’ve been reading, then we call it ‘romantic love.’ Do you understand?”

Turing tilted her head back and forth. “I am not certain. How can organics distinguish one love from another?”

“Well, generally you can tell… I mean, organics can tell the difference pretty easily. But sometimes I guess it can be difficult. Especially if you feel one type of love for somepony, but they have another for you.”

“Such a thing is possible?”

“Sure it is!” Cadance said. “Like, when two ponies are friends, but one begins to have romantic feelings for the other, it can be really difficult, especially when only one friend feels that way.”

“What is the source of difficulty? Why do they not simply state their feelings?”

“I tend to think honesty is… well, usually the best policy,” Cadance said, “but sometimes it can be embarrassing to know that a friend sees you in that way.”

“In what way?”

“You know,” Cadance said, a blush coming to her cheeks. “Romantically.”

Turing tilted her head, obviously not getting it.

Cadance sighed. “Physically, Turing.”

Turing’s eyes shifted. “Understood. You are referring to intercourse.”

Cadance laughed nervously. “Y-yes.”

“Then romantic love and intercourse are complementary to each other?”

“Well, not necessarily, but a lot of the time.”

Turing nodded. “And that is how you were impregnated.”

Cadance rolled her eyes. “Yes, Turing,” she sighed, “that’s how I got pregnant.”

Turing stood up, nodding. “Understood. I apologize if I have said anything inappropriate in my attempts to learn.”

With a gentle smile, Cadance put a hoof on her shoulder. “No, don’t worry, Turing. It’s only natural to be curious.”

Turing glanced down. “If you do not mind, I have an additional request, Cadance.”

She smiled. “Yes?”

“If it is not troublesome, may I touch your abdomen?”

Cadance’s eyes went wide.

“My apologies,” Turing said, taking a few steps back when she saw Cadance’s reaction. “I did not wish to--”

“No, no, it’s… it’s okay, you just surprised me, that’s all,” Cadance said, slowly relaxing. “Just be gentle, all right?”

Turing nodded. “Understood,” she replied.

Cadance sat, exposing her slightly protruding belly. Ever so gently, very slowly, Turing placed her metallic hoof on it. Cadance shivered at the cold touch, but only for a moment as she got used to it. Turing was still as she held her hoof in place, her sensors taking a reading of the slight movement of the tiny being within.

In a hushed, awed tone, she whispered but one word: “Incredible.”

***

It was a few days later, back at Twilight’s castle, when Turing knocked on the door to the study. Twilight called “Come in!” and Turing Test entered.

“Hello, Turing!” Twilight said, giving her a warm smile as she glanced up from her book. Spike was next to her, holding a quill in his claw, and he likewise looked up at her. The two of them were seated at a small table with books and papers.

“Forgive my interruption, Twilight Sparkle. Are you occupied at the moment?”

“Well, just a little, but we could take a short break,” Twilight said, which caused Spike to breathe a sigh of relief as he massaged his tired claw. “What’s on your mind?”

“I wish to speak to you about love and intercourse.”

Twilight instantly began sputtering, her wings flaring out as she nearly fell off her stool.

Spike just blinked. “About love and… what was that last word?”

“Nothing, ha ha!” Twilight said quickly. “Oh, gee, Spike, we’re getting low on ink, so why don’t you go to the store and buy some!” She stared at him with a tight, plastered-on smile. There was sweat forming on her brow.

Spike raised an eyebrow. “Huh? Twilight, we’ve got an entire bottle left!” he exclaimed, holding it up.

“Oh, do we? Gee, let me see that!” She shot out her hoof, practically smacking the bottle out of Spike’s claw and causing it to fall to the floor, smashing to pieces. “Whoopsie! I’m such a butterhooves today, haha! Guess you need to buy some after all!”

She levitated a bag of bits and shoved it into his claws roughly.

“But, Twilight, I wanted to--”

“No no, I insist, we need ink annnnd oh, what the hay, go get a massage and a hot mineral bath at the spa while you’re at it, take your time!”

Spike broke into a grin. “Wow, really? All right, thanks Twilight!” He hugged her and dashed out of the room, shutting the door behind him.

“Ugh!” Twilight groaned, placing her face in her hooves. “That was close.” She then raised her head and glared at Turing Test. “Turing, what’s wrong with you?! You can’t talk about stuff like that in front of Spike!”

Turing bowed her head. “My apologies. In the future, I will stand behind him.”

Twilight pounded her head on the desk.

“Perhaps I should return later, if you are unwilling to answer my inquiry.”

“No, no,” she sighed as she slowly began to calm herself down. “It’s my responsibility to teach you about friendship and life and important things like this. Sooo… I guess you want to know about, um... the birds and bees?”

“Negative. I have no interest in how birds and bees have sex.”

Twilight stared blankly at Turing Test. She stayed that way for several moments before her brain finally re-engaged.

“Turing, maybe you should just tell me what you want to know.”

“Acknowledged,” she replied, giving a short nod. “Twilight Sparkle, on our recent trip to the Crystal Empire, I discussed the topic of love with Cadance. She was very helpful. It has made me consider some of my own recent experiences and how I might continue to develop my own identify further.”

Twilight stood up from where she was sitting and went over to her. “Oh. You’re really serious about this, aren’t you?”

“Affirmative. As you will recall, Twilight Sparkle, I informed you of my experiences with Applejack’s family several weeks ago. I greatly enjoyed the experience of being part of a family unit, and I am happy that you and Spike the Dragon accept me as a member of your family in turn.”

Twilight smiled at that. “Well, of course we do, Turing!”

“However, I have observed how many organics seek relationships with others outside their family to form pairs and, eventually, their own family units. Seeing that Cadance is now beginning to ‘show’ and noting your anticipation of the birth of a new addition to your family has made me consider my own situation.”

Twilight frowned. “What do you mean?”

“Organics can procreate. They can reproduce and become parents.” She paused, looking down. “But I will not. I am a machine, and thus I cannot have foals.”

Twilight’s frown deepened. She went to Turing and held her. “Oh, Turing,” she said quietly.

“It is all right, Twilight Sparkle. I believe it is something I must accept.”

Twilight paused and then released her. “Well, actually, now that I think about it, maybe you can have foals!” She smiled. “After all, if somepony built you, then maybe someday you could, well, build your own offspring!”

Turing’s ears shifted, squeaking on their hinges. “That is true. However, as the process used to create me remains unknown, such a thing is currently impossible. Still, you are right that the possibility of a family for me may yet exist at some point in the future.”

Twilight smiled. “Well, I’m glad I could help!”

Turing held up a hoof. “My apologies, Twilight Sparkle, but the subject of offspring was not the primary topic I wished to discuss with you.”

Twilight blinked at her, not understanding.

“In an effort to better integrate with organic ponies and find my own sense of identity, I wish to experience a romantic relationship.”

Twilight gawked. “You mean… you want to… to date somepony?!”

“Scanning… ‘date: verb. To go on a date.’ Scanning… ‘date: noun. 1. the oblong edible fruit of a palm. 2. the time at which--’”

“I mean you want to have a romance! A special somepony!”

Turing stopped quoting her internal dictionary and nodded.

Twilight rubbed her forehead. “Oh wow… oh Sweet Celestia…”

“I doubt she would be receptive to me.”

Twilight burst out laughing at that. When she’d mostly recovered, holding her sides and wiping her eyes, she said, “Listen, Turing, in all seriousness, I’m not sure that you’re quite ready for, um, romance.”

“Perhaps not. But I will not know if I do not try.”

“But… I mean… a robot and an organic pony?!”

“I realize it is unconventional. However, many individuals have unconventional relationships. Dr. Turing is a griffon in a romantic relationship with a changeling. Mr. Vanderbull is a minotaur whose wife is a pony. Gummy and Boulder--”

“Okay, okay, I get it! Sheesh!” Twilight rolled her eyes. “Look, it’s… I just don’t want you to get hurt.”

Turing said nothing but then slowly lowered her head and ears. “Then you are forbidding me from entering into such a relationship?”

Twilight shut her eyes, taking a long breath and releasing it with glacial slowness.

“All right, fine,” she said, giving Turing a weak smile. “I don’t feel right holding you back. So, if this is what you want, then… okay, you have my support.”

Turing Test stood up straight, her ears twitching rapidly. “Thank you, Twilight Sparkle! I am very excited to initiate courtship rituals!” Then she paused, her ears going still. “Now, how shall I proceed?”

Twilight raised a hoof and opened her mouth before suddenly freezing, her eyes darting back and forth.

“Okay, maybe romance isn’t something I know that much about.” She scratched her head, considering options. “Well, none of our friends are dating anypony right now, but I think I know at least one of us who might know a thing or two about attraction…”

***

Rarity levitated a cup of tea up to her lips and took a sip. She smiled serenely and leaned forward on her kitchen table. “You’ve come to the right place, darling.”

Twilight broke into a wide grin and put her foreleg over Turing’s shoulder. “So you’ll help her, Rarity?”

“How could I say no!” Rarity replied. She lightly patted Turing’s hoof. “Don’t worry, Turing Test; we’ll find the stallion of your dreams in no time!”

Turing bowed her head. “Thank you, Rarity. I am hopeful that I will be able to attract a compatible partner.”

“Attract is the key word, I suppose,” Rarity said, rubbing her chin. “The problem is that you are very, ah, unconventional in your appearance. Normally I’d suggest learning how to develop a certain look in your eye or a way of smiling or winking, but, well…”

Turing’s ears flattened. “My lack of a mouth or eyelids is problematic.”

“Indeed,” Rarity said, “but that doesn’t mean we don’t still have some options. For instance, we could try using your voice instead. Come here, Turing, and whisper something seductive into my ear.”

“Understood.” She stood and went up to Rarity, who lifted her ear as Turing came closer.

“You are aesthetically pleasing. I wish to interface with you.”

Rarity made a sour face and backed away. “Well, you have the basic idea, I suppose, but perhaps that’s not the best approach.”

Twilight sighed. “I was afraid of that. Turing, don’t take this the wrong way, but you might be running up against simple organic nature. For animals and ponies alike, a lot of physical attraction is based on hormones and pheromones, and you have neither. For that matter, you don’t even have the… um… equipment for this sort of thing.”

“Because I do not have lips?”

“Y-yes,” Twilight said, blushing. “Among, you know… other things.”

Turing noticed Rarity was also blushing. “Understood. Perhaps such things would be too unpleasing for organics.” She lowered her head and made for the door. “Very well. I will not pursue this further.”

Rarity suddenly got to hind legs, slamming her front hooves on the table. “No! I will not accept that it’s as simple as that, nor will I let you give up without trying!”

Turing stopped and slowly walked back to the table. “But how will I evoke feelings of romantic attraction without chemical signals?”

“Oh, pfft,” Rarity said, rolling her eyes, “chemicals are overrated! Besides, we can always let you borrow some perfume. Coco Pommel recently sent me a scent, as it were, and we could always experiment! What sort of aroma do you think you would like to associate with yourself? Lavender? Rosewater?”

Turing tapped her chin. “Perhaps I could dab some motor oil behind my ears?”

Rarity’s eye twitched. “Okay, nix on the perfume. In that case, we’ll have to rely on two of the grandest weapons a mare has in her arsenal: fashion and body language!”

She raised a hoof to the side of her mouth and shouted “Sweetie Belle!”

The sound of small hooves galloping was heard, and Sweetie appeared around the corner. “Yes, Rarity?”

“Be a darling and find my camera for me, won’t you?”

Sweetie smiled. “Sure!” She then glanced over at Turing Test. “Oh, hi, Turing! Is Rarity taking pictures of you?”

“I believe so, though I am uncertain how it pertains to matters of romance and intercourse.”

Sweetie Belle scrunched her face. “Inter-what now?”

“Gah!” Rarity shouted and roughly shoved a bag into Sweetie’s hooves. “Sweetie Belle, here’s twenty bits! After you get the camera, go to the movies or something and don’t ask any more questions on the way!”

“Ooh!” Sweetie cooed. Then she raised an eyebrow. “Wait, is this like that time I found your black sketch book you told me never to look at again?”

Rarity narrowed her gaze. “Camera. No questions. Movies. Go!”

“All right, all right!” she groaned, walking off in a huff to find the camera.

***

After a few experiments with outfits and photographing several poses, the three mares gathered around Rarity’s table as she spread the photos for all to see.

“Well!” Rarity said, smiling and looking pleased with herself. “I think that went rather well!”

Twilight was smiling, but at each picture, the smile grew more and more forced.

“You believe that by utilizing these poses to enhance my femininity, I will appear more aesthetically pleasing and attractive to stallions?” Turing asked, looking to Rarity.

“I’m certain of it!” Rarity said, beaming at her.

Twilight held her tongue as she glanced back at the photos.

There was one of Turing Test blowing a kiss to the camera, another a vertical shot of her lying on a bed, looking up, another of her standing on her hind legs on a giant fake clamshell holding one foreleg over her chest with the other holding up her tail (Rarity called it the “Venus de Mustang” pose), and one with her holding up a large, red paper heart.

Twilight couldn’t decide if they were cute or mildly disturbing, but she was starting to suspect that somewhere along the line, Rarity had gone from helping Turing Test to just playing dress-up.

“Well then!” Rarity said, turning to face Turing Test. “Now that you’ve practiced the physical arts, perhaps you should work on your, um, verbal technique. And I have just the thing for that as well!” She held up a thin, red book and levitated it over to Turing.

“The title is The Art of Seduction, by Lacey Saddles,” Turing said, examining the book.

Twilight frowned. “Turing, I’m not sure you should--”

Turing flipped through the book, processing it in less than ten seconds. “Analyzed,” she said.

“Excellent!” Rarity exclaimed. “Now, go forth, young robot, and make those techniques your own! Find your special somepony!”

“Understood.” She gave Rarity a brief hug. “Thank you for your assistance, Rarity. I hope I will gain significant romantic experience.”

She moved for the door when Twilight teleported into her path.

“M-maybe you shouldn’t, Turing. I mean, at least not by yourself!” She swallowed. “It might be better with one of us there to support you!”

Turing’s eyes shifted. “Twilight Sparkle, are you indicating that I require a chaperone?”

Twilight glanced over at Rarity, who just shrugged. “Well, would that be such a bad idea?”

“While I acknowledge that I am less experienced that most ponies, I have proven myself to be a capable learner. Furthermore, I wish to do this on my own. I am concerned that your presence may pressure others to accept my offer or invite those who wish to have greater access to a Princess.”

Twilight blinked. “Oh,” she said quietly. “I… wow, I guess I never considered that.” She heaved a sigh but offered her a weak smile. “All right, Turing, I won’t interfere. Just… you know, if things get rough for you, then I’ll be around to help. We all will.”

Turing nodded. “Thank you, Twilight Sparkle.”

With that, Twilight stepped aside and watched as Turing went outside, making her way into Ponyville to seek the perfect mate.

“There she goes, Twilight,” Rarity said, hugging Twilight as she laid her head against her. “Our little robot is growing up.”

Twilight raised an eyebrow at Rarity. “Are you really sure this is a good idea, Rarity? I can’t think of anypony who would date a robot. I mean, would you?”

“I don’t know, darling,” she replied with a chuckle, “but then, nopony’s built any hunky robot stallions yet, either.”

Twilight groaned and rolled her eyes. “But still, Rarity, what if she gets her heart broken? What if she gets rejected and never wants to try to love anypony again?!” she cried.

Rarity turned serious and looked Twilight in the eyes. “There’s no reward without risk, Twilight,” she said quietly. “And what if she is successful? What if she meets some handsome stranger and it is absolutely wonderful? Do you really want to deny her that experience?”

Twilight lowered her gaze, shaking her head. “No. I… I guess I don’t.”

Rarity smiled, patting Twilight on her shoulder. “Then try not to worry.” Then her grin turned more mischievous. “Besides, with a robodonkadonk like that, she might well have to beat potential suitors off with a stick!”

Twilight gawked at her, a dry rattle in her throat.

To be continued...

Author's Notes:

And so begins the first chapter of the "Romance" arc. This wasn't something I had originally planned on writing back in the conception stage, but that applies to lots of stuff that I ended up writing. A lot of readers were curious as to how Turing Test would do in a romantic setting, and I had to concede that it was interesting and might be fun to write. So, for those readers, this one's for you!

Okay, time for references:

-First, a reference I didn't make, but so help me, I thought about it. When Turing asks Cadance "What is love?" and she echoes it, I was going to have her suddenly clutch her belly and go "Ow! Baby, don't hurt me!" ...But I thought that was reaching too far for a reference joke, even for me.

-For an actual reference, a lot of Turing's poses were based on some common tropes, though Turing blowing a kiss was based vaguely on Marilyn Monroe as well as the scene in "Simple Ways" where Applejack dresses up and blows a kiss to the camera.

-Additionally, of course, is Turing's "Venus de Mustang" pose, which is based on the famous picture "Venus on the Half-Shell."

-Rarity refers to getting some perfume from Coco Pommel. This is an oblique reference to the fragrance "Chanel No. 5," originally produced and sold by Coco Chanel, Miss Pommel's namesake.

-Of course, the most overt reference is the title which this time is a song, but not by Daft Punk. Instead, it is the excellent tune "Love Machine" by The Miracles, a supergroup of some of Motown's best and brightest. It's one of my favorite songs and has appeared in countless movies and TV shows. And now at least one fanfic.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ox73rMg_cik

I tried to get a video with lyrics, but there didn't appear to be one readily available, so, uh, here's a lyrics sheet to follow.

See you next time, folks!

Love Machine, Part 2

View Online

Turing walked through the center of town, her hooves crunching through the snow. She glanced around her, taking in the sight of Ponyville’s residents going about their business.

Analyzing surroundings: though there are more female than male members of Ponyville’s population, the number of potential romantic partners is significant. Now seeking stallions unaccompanied by mares.

She slowly scanned the area, drawing odd stares from some passersby, until she at last spotted a blue unicorn stallion with a wavy white mane sitting alone on a bench, drinking a cup of a steaming hot beverage. She began to make her way toward him.

Target locked.

Pokey Pierce was taking a sip of his cocoa when he heard a strange whirring behind him. He turned in time to see two large, glowing violet eyes staring at him. He gave a start and nearly dropped his cup as the mechanical mare placed her hooves on the back of the bench.

“Hello there, aesthetically pleasing stallion,” Turing said in what she probably thought constituted a breathy voice. “What is your name?”

“Uhhh… hi?” Pokey Pierce asked. He blinked at her before finally saying, “Oh! Uh, my name’s Pokey Pierce.”

“And I am Turing Test. I see you are enjoying a hot drink.”

Pokey nodded, relaxing slightly as he leaned back on the bench. “Yeah,” he replied giving her a small smile, “it’s… it’s kind of cold today.”

“That is correct. Well, if you are feeling cold, then perhaps you need somepony to warm you up.” She swiftly moved next to him, nuzzling her metallic cheek against his.

“Uwah!” he shouted, jerking back. “Y-you’re freezing!”

Turing’s ears twitched. “My apologies. I will increase power to my systems in order to heat myself and then attempt seduction again.”

The soft electrical hum she normally emitted began to grow in intensity, her body began to vibrate and rumble, and her eyes began to shine more brightly.

Pokey Pierce yelped and dashed off in a panic, dropping his cocoa.

Attempt failed. Re-evaluating strategy. Reduce physical closeness and attempt a target with more familiarity. Analyzing… new target designated.

***

Applejack, Apple Bloom, and Big Mac made their way up the path to their home, fresh bags of food and supplies slung over their backs.

“Brr!” Apple Bloom said, shivering. “I can’t wait fer Winter Wrap up! I’m freezin’ my tail off!”

“I hear ya, sugarcube,” Applejack said. “‘Course, we’ll have to get back to plantin’ an’ harvest the winter rye once it’s spring.”

“Eeyup!” Big Mac agreed. He went inside the house first, carrying his bags of oats and potatoes to the kitchen. He walked through the doorway and froze in midstep, his eyes going wide.

Turing Test was lying on her belly on the kitchen table. She held her face in her hooves and glanced up at him when he entered.

“Hii~ii!” she said, drawing out the word.

Big Mac only stared back at her.

“Welcome home, Big McIntosh,” she continued. “I was experiencing a 23% increase in loneliness when I recalled Granny Smith asking my opinion of you. Are you pleased by my presence?”

She began to trace playful circles on the table with one hoof as she brushed the coils of her polymer mane out of her face with the other. As she did, Applejack and Apple Bloom came up behind Big Mac, who was still staring wordlessly at Turing Test.

“Big Mac?” Applejack asked, squeezing by him. “What the hay are ya doin’ just standin’ in the doorway like--” She likewise froze when she saw Turing on the table.

Turing Test waved to Applejack. “Hello, Applejack.”

Neither she nor Big Mac replied. Apple Bloom finally broke the silence. “Turing Test? What’re you doin’ on the table?”

“I am attempting to entice your brother to enter a romantic relationship with me by behaving in a playfully seductive manner. It is not having the desired effect, so I will switch to a different pose.”

She switched from lying on her belly to reclining on her side, resting her head on one hoof as she raised her knee. “Rarity’s book refers this to as the ‘Draw Me Like One of your Prench Girls’ pose. My apologies, but I must now continue enticing your brother.”

Big Mac’s jaw dropped open. Applejack covered her mouth with her hoof, beginning to snicker.

“Big McIntosh, can you not see that I require you? I need an above-average sized stallion who is also sufficiently strong and kind hearted to accept my affections.” She paused, waiting for his response. When none came, she added, “That compliment was intended to increase your confidence and inform you of my receptivity to a romantic relationship. Also, I have taken the liberty of spreading hay across the floor of your barn. For some reason, Rarity’s book indicates that we would enjoy rolling in it.”

Applejack’s snickering now sounded like choking. Apple Bloom tilted her head and raised an eyebrow. As for Big Mac…

“Nope.” He backed up. “Nope. Nope nope nope!” He continued repeating that as he ran back through the living room and out the front door of the house. “Nnnnooope! Nopenopenopenope…”

Turing Test stared after him as he ran up the road, kicking up a cloud of snow behind him as he dashed off over the horizon. Her ears flattened, and she stepped off the kitchen table.

“Attempt failed,” she said.

“Well, I ain’t too sure what’s goin’ on here, Turing,” Apple Bloom said, “but if ya still want to roll around in some hay, I’d be glad to join ya instead!”

“No, no, that’s… that ain’t necessary,” Applejack said quickly, placing a hoof on Apple Bloom’s shoulder. “Look, uh, would ya mind carryin’ some o’ the groceries to the cellar? I think I need to have some ‘grown up’ talk with Turing Test.”

“Aw, why can’t I stay?” she whined. “She ain’t even a year old yet! I’m older’n that, at least!”

“That ain’t the point!”

“Well what is the point?”

“I’ll tell ya when yer older, now git!” Applejack snapped.

Apple Bloom grumbled as she walked off to the cellar, leaving Applejack and Turing Test alone.

“Look, Turing,” she sighed, putting her hooves on Turing’s shoulders, “it ain’t that Big Mac doesn’t like ya, but maybe he ain’t exactly ready fer a relationship yet.”

Turing nodded, rubbing her chin with a metallic scraping sound. “Applejack, many ponies seem uninterested in the prospect of having me as a romantic partner. Am I… unappealing?”

Applejack’s eyes darted left and right. “Uh… well, it ain’t that, exactly, but I think most stallions ain’t quite used to the idea o’ havin’ a robot fer a girlfriend.”

“I anticipated that to be the case, but Big McIntosh is one of the few stallions I have familiarity with.”

Applejack frowned. “Look, sugarcube, I’m sure once he’s recovered he’ll be glad to stay friends. I know fer a fact that he likes ya, but just maybe not that way.” She sighed and offered her a smile. “Ain’t there anypony you know who might be a bit more into, uh… machinery?”

Turing’s ears lifted. “I know of such a pony. I will locate him immediately!”

She turned to go, but Applejack ran ahead of her. “Hold on there, ya thirsty little love machine,” she said, holding up a hoof. “I know yer eager an’ all, but back there with Big Mac, ya came on a little strong. Ya might wanna just cut out all them fancy lines that Rarity’s book gave ya an’ just be upfront about how ya feel. Besides, talkin’ like that ain’t gonna net ya a nice fella that’ll treat ya right; yer more likely to get one that’ll think o’ ya as a piece o’ meat. Metal. Whatever.”

Turing nodded slowly. “I see. Thank you, Applejack. I had not realized my techniques were counterproductive. Perhaps my next attempt will go more smoothly.”

***

Hearing his doorbell ring, the Doctor trotted over and answered it.

Turing Test stood in the doorway.

“Hello, Doctor,” she said.

“Ah, hello there Turing Test!” the Doctor said, smiling at her. He adjusted his tie, straightening it. “How are you? Ear still working correctly, I trust?”

Turing nodded. “Yes. Thank you.” She twitched her ears as if to prove it to him.

“Well, would you like to come in?” he asked. “Derpy and I were just testing a new invention of mine. It’s a belt that circumvents the normal passage of time for the wearer so that they can move or do other things much faster! I’m thinking of calling it the ‘Hasty Waisty.’”

A gray blur sped by behind him yelling “Weeeeeeee!” It then crashed into a wall, the force knocking several clocks and pictures off a nearby shelf.

“...Unfortunately, it doesn’t seem to have improved poor Derpy’s reflexes by much,” he sighed. He walked inside as Turing Test followed. “Derpy, are you all right?”

Derpy sat up, shaking her head. A brown belt with a dial in place of a buckle was around her waist. “Yes,I’mfine,Doc!ThisthingjusttakesalittlewhiletogetusedtobutIthinkI’mgettingthehangofit!” she said, her voice rapid and high-pitched.

“Ah, just a moment,” the Doctor said, turning the dial on the belt. “There. Better?”

“Much better!” she said, standing up and giving him a smile. “Hi, Turing!” she added, waving to her.

“Hello, Derpy. It seems that the Doctor’s new invention is effective.”

“It sure is!” she exclaimed, taking to the air. “When I get used to it, I’ll be the fastest mailmare in Ponyville!”

The Doctor furrowed his brow. “I’m not sure it will save much time if you can’t manage to avoid crashing into things, my friend.” He sighed. “At this rate, you’re likely to knock the mailboxes right off their posts, assuming you don’t go flying right through some poor pony’s wall.”

Derpy pouted. “You don’t have to be mean about it,” she said, giving back the belt.

“Just concerned is all,” he said raising his head indignantly. Then his eyes went wide. “Oh, but yes, of course, where are my manners?” He looked to Turing Test. “Now, um, can I help you, Miss Turing?”

Turing Test nodded. “I have been advised to be more direct with my intentions. I apologize if my explanation is insufficiently subtle, however, as many organics prefer subtlety.”

“Ah ha,” the Doctor said, exchanging a confused look with Derpy.

“You see, Doctor, I am interested in the topic of romantic relationships and am now considering potential romantic partners.”

Derpy stiffened. The Doctor, however, only smiled and said, “A romantic partner, you say? Oh that’s fantastic! Anyone you fancy, then?”

Turing cocked her head. “When you say ‘fancy,’ are you implying attraction or interest? If so, then my answer is affirmative. You see, I have been advised that many stallions would find me unacceptable as a partner due to my status as a machine. Therefore, I should seek a pony with an affinity for machines.”

The Doctor was nodding slowly, when a grin broke out across his face. “Ah ha! Now I understand! Well, my friend, you have certainly come to the right place!”

Derpy’s skewed eyes widened, and she stared at the Doctor, covering her mouth with her hooves. “D-Doc?”

“I know every engineer, mechanic, and repair pony from here to Canterlot!” the Doctor declared, placing a hoof on his chest. “Just a mo’, I’ll see if I can’t find a list of them! Bound to be one of them that would enjoy your company!” He turned around and galloped into the nearby hallway.

“Doctor,” she said, reaching after him, “you misundersta--”

Derpy suddenly rushed forward and clutched her hoof. Turing paused and looked into her eyes, which were trying to focus on her.

“I know what you’re asking,” she whispered, “even if Doc doesn’t.” She swallowed. “But… please don’t. I mean, I… I don’t want you to be unhappy, but…”

She glanced over her shoulder, her cheeks flushing.

Turing’s eyes shifted and she looked from Derpy to the hallway, hearing the sound of the Doctor busily rummaging through supplies in his back room. She turned back to Derpy, who locked eyes with her and looked at her pleadingly.

“I see. You also are pursuing a relationship?”

“Um… I… I’d like to,” she muttered, looking down, chuckling nervously.

Turing tapped her chin. “Can we not share him?”

Derpy gawked at her, turning bright red, but she quickly regained her composure and shook her head. “N-no! I mean, I know that might sound selfish, but… it’s just that…”

She gulped and held her hooves to her chest, smiling.

“Some things are too precious to share.”

Turing bowed her head. “Understood. Out of consideration for our friendship, I will not pursue this relationship.” She heard the Doctor give a shout as something heavy fell on top of him, the assorted contents clattering across the floor. “I will leave now. Please help the Doctor and give him my thanks.”

Derpy let out a sigh of relief and gave Turing Test a quick hug. “Thank you,” she whispered, and flew back to the hallway to help the Doctor find his way out of whatever mess he’d gotten himself into.

Turing quietly let herself out, shutting the door gently behind her.

***

Bon Bon rubbed her chin as she stared at the snow shovel the vendor had laid on the counter of the outdoor market.

“I don’t know,” she said slowly, narrowing her eyes. “Is that handle going to be all right to use for an earth pony or a unicorn? It might be tough on my teeth.”

The vendor rolled his eyes. “It’ll be fine. Seriously, are you really going to haggle over this? It’s fifteen bits.”

“But--”

“Period!”

Bon Bon sighed. It was a fair price, she supposed, but she always liked to be thrifty. “All right, fifteen. Lyra, could you give me the purse so we can--” She turned and stopped in mid-sentence when she saw Lyra was no longer there. She made a face.

“Excuse me,” she said to the vendor as she began to search for Lyra.

She glanced around the market but didn’t see her anywhere.

“Lyra!” she called, raising a hoof to her mouth. “Lyra, where are you?”

“Here! I’m here!” Lyra exclaimed, emerging from a nearby aisle and galloping over to her.

Bon Bon smiled, but her smile quickly faded when she saw what Lyra had around her neck: a bright pink scarf.

“Uh, Lyra? Where’d you get that scarf?”

“Oh, I saw it at a vendor we passed on the way to get that snow shovel,” she replied, holding out the end of the scarf and rubbing it against her cheek. “It’s really warm, too! So, did you find a new shovel?”

“Yes, I did,” Bon Bon said, her frown deepening, “but you have our money, remember?”

Lyra grinned sheepishly. “Oh, right.” She levitated the purse out from beneath the scarf and put it in Bon Bon’s hoof.

Bon Bon undid the small coin purse and peered inside. A growl built up in her. “Lyyyraaa!” she groaned. “There are only seven bits in here! You spent our money on that scarf; now we can’t buy the shovel!”

Lyra’s ears flattened. She pouted. “You want me to return the scarf?”

Bon Bon opened her mouth to say something, but then paused, seeing Lyra’s expression.

“Well, I mean,” she stammered, “it’s just that… I mean, you bought a scarf two weeks ago!”

“But it was blue, and you said it didn’t look good on me, so I saw this pink one and the color of it reminded me of that time at the fair last summer--”

“Oh, when we got that cotton candy that tasted a little like bubble gum, and it got all over my face--”

“--and when I said it looked like a beard, you started laughing like you were Santa Hooves--”

“--and that filly came up and asked if I was Mrs. Santa Hooves!”

The two of them burst out laughing. When they finally got control over themselves, Bon Bon heaved a sigh, but she did so with a resigned smile.

“Okay, Lyra,” she said, holding up a hoof, “you can keep the scarf. We’ll just have to borrow Cherry Berry’s or June Bug’s for a while.”

“All right!” Lyra cheered, gleefully kicking her forelegs in the air. She went over and hugged Bon Bon. “Thanks, Bon Bon!”

“Yeah, yeah,” Bon Bon replied, rolling her eyes. “Well, let’s get home. It’s cold out here, and--” She paused, seeing something out of the corner of her eye. She released Lyra, and they both turned to see Turing Test standing nearby, watching them.

“Oh, Turing Test!” Lyra said, smiling warmly. “Sorry, we didn’t see you there!”

“It is all right. I saw you as I was walking around the market. In truth, I have been walking around Ponyville in an attempt to ‘clear my head.’ I have heard that taking a walk is conducive to thinking about one’s problems.”

Lyra and Bon Bon glanced at each other, then back to Turing Test.

“What sort of trouble are you having?” Bon Bon asked. “Is there anything we can do to help?”

“I am uncertain if you can help,” Turing Test replied, “but I am having difficulty with establishing a romantic relationship.”

“Oooh!” Lyra said, leaning in closer. “I think this calls for a conference at Sugarcube Corner!”

***

Sitting at a table in Sugarcube Corner that afternoon with Bon Bon and Turing Test, Lyra slurped her caramel mochaccino through her straw, then drew it out to lick the excess whipped cream from it. “Oh wow, I love that they sell hot coffee drinks here during the winter!” she exclaimed.

Bon Bon rolled her eyes. “I’m all for helping Turing Test,” she said, gesturing to the robot, “but did we have to come here to do it? Don’t you think we could both stand to eat fewer sweets?”

Lyra chuckled and pointed at Bon Bon’s cupcake. “So you’re saying you don’t want that cupcake?” She took hold of it with her magic and began to pull it toward herself before Bon Bon seized it, yanking it back.

“I didn’t say that!” she snapped.

“My apologies,” Turing Test said, raising a hoof, “but I am still curious how you may be able to help me with my problem.”

“Oh, right, sorry,” Bon Bon said, blushing slightly as Lyra did the same. “Well, why don’t you just tell us what you’ve been doing, and maybe we can help.”

Turing Test told them about her conversation with Cadance, her getting help from Twilight and Rarity, and her attempts with Pokey Pierce, Big Mac, and the Doctor.

“Well,” Bon Bon muttered once Turing had finished, “that explains why Big Mac was running through Ponyville yelling ‘Nope nope nope!’ until he smacked into that wall.”

“Well, don’t be too discouraged, Turing,” Lyra said, patting Turing’s hoof gently. “After all, that’s just three different guys!”

“Perhaps so, but due to strangers finding my approach to be off-putting, I have determined that a more familiar target has a higher probability of success.”

“Pfft, ‘target!’” Lyra giggled.

Bon Bon ignored that but steepled her hooves as she faced Turing. “Look, Turing, I know you’re eager, but Lyra’s right! Like they say, there are plenty of fish in the sea!”

“I do not… oh. You are speaking in metaphor. You are saying that I have other options available to me.”

“Right!” Bon Bon said, giving a satisfied nod. “I mean, if you want, you could always have your friends introduce you to somepony! Like, say… uh, what about Bulk Biceps?”

Turing Test shook her head. “I appreciate him as a friend, but I do not feel we are sufficiently compatible. His method of articulation is far more energetic than mine.”

Lyra reached for a napkin and took a small pencil from the coin purse she’d been carrying. “Okay, somepony with lower energy,” she said, taking a note.

“Good idea, Lyra!” Bon Bon said, smiling enthusiastically. “Keeping a list of good qualities might help us out!”

“That may be an effective strategy,” Turing said. “I also appreciate ponies who are not disturbed by my appearance.”

“Kind of a given, but sure,” Lyra murmured.

Bon Bon closed her eyes. “Let’s see… maybe somepony who shares interests?”

“I enjoy interaction, learning new things, and humor.”

“Hmm… talking, learning, jokes…”

“Due to my difficulty understanding unspoken nuances of organic interaction, I appreciate those who are honest and who speak plainly. Also, I am grateful to ponies who are patient with me when I do not initially comprehend their meaning.”

“...honest, plain-spoken, patient.” Lyra nodded, giving a satisfied smile. “Hm, not bad!”

“Well, does that help, Turing?” Bon Bon asked.

Turing tapped her chin. “I am uncertain. Even if a match is found, what other criteria will inform me of mutual affection?”

“Well, body language, blushing, your heart beating faster,” Lyra replied.

“Plus they just might tell you straight out if they think you’re cute,” Bon Bon said, giving Lyra a sly smile.

“Or give you a nice present,” Lyra added, returning Bon Bon’s smile, gazing into her eyes.

The two were quiet for a moment as they locked eyes, slowly edging closer to one another.

“Do you have further criteria?” Turing Test asked.

Both mares sat up straight, turning to stare at Turing. They blushed, apparently having forgotten that she was still there.

“Er, well, I think that should cover it,” Bon Bon said, giving a nervous smile as she cleared her throat.

“Yeah, I think we’ve got a good list!” However, her smile began to fade. “Unfortunately, I’m not sure if I know too many guys like this. Well, Caramel’s pretty sweet, but he’s dating Sassaflash. Oh, how about that guy with the shamrock cutie mark you know, Bon Bon?”

“Lucky? Pfft!” Bon Bon scoffed. “That guy’s either really dense or just not interested. Berry Punch told me she went to an all-night party trying to get with him, and he didn’t even seem to get the hint.”

“Wow! She was up all night to get Lucky?”

“Apparently so,” Bon Bon sighed. “In any case, I don’t think he’s an option.”

Turing sat up straight. “One moment… searching for known matches… no results found matching criteria.” Her ears lowered. “I do not know of any stallions that fit a sufficient number of criteria. Shall I broaden my search results?”

Bon Bon tapped her chin. “I’d hate to make you compromise too much,” she said. Then, chuckling, she added, “Heh… it’s too bad you’re only interested in stallions.”

Turing cocked her head at that. “The only non-equine males I know are Spike the Dragon and Mr. Cornelius Vanderbull. One is of insufficient age while the other is married.”

Lyra blinked. “Um, Turing, I think she means, um… mares.”

Turing’s ears twitched. “I had not considered that.”

“Well, I mean, if you only like stallions,” Lyra said hurriedly, “then that’s all that matters.”

“My criteria was based on the typical family unit and the majority of relationships depicted in works of fiction. Rarity assumed that I was targeting stallions, thus I adopted her methodologies.”

Bon Bon leaned closer. “Wait, then… well, who are you attracted to?”

“I do not feel physical attraction, Bon Bon,” Turing replied. “I am merely seeking a compatible partner who may appreciate me. I have no biological imperative to seek a partner for breeding.”

Lyra nodded, taking another sip of her mochaccino. “Well, that makes sense, I guess. I mean, you’re a robot, so you’re not really a mare--”

“Incorrect,” Turing said with sudden forcefulness, drawing herself up. “I am designated as Unit 003M, the M designating me as a mare. Furthermore, a crucial part of my development has involved ponies referring to me using feminine pronouns, rather than simply as ‘it.’ I am female.”

“Oh, jeez, Turing, I’m sorry!” Lyra cried, holding up a hoof. “I… I didn’t mean it like that.”

Turing bowed her head. “My apologies, Lyra. I did not wish to chastise you. I simply wish to be treated primarily as a pony. My status as a machine is part of my identity, but it is secondary to that.”

Bon Bon smiled. “Well, if it’s not an issue for you, Turing, then maybe you should think beyond just stallions. After all, love is about what you feel. If you know of somepony that you think might be your special somepony, then you should go get him or her!”

Turing nodded slowly. “Understood. I will accept your advice and reapply my search parameters to both genders.”

She sat back up, her eyes constricting slightly as she broadened her search.

Now matching to search criteria…
-Below average energy
-Undisturbed/appreciative of my appearance
-Enjoys interaction
-Studious
-Enjoys humor
-Honest
-Low use of nuanced speech
-Above average patience
-Body language including increased heart rate or blushing in my presence
-Offered a gift to me

Turing’s eyes returned to normal, but her ears stood straight on end. “Search complete,” she said to Lyra and Bon Bon. “One match found with 100% accuracy.”

Bon Bon and Lyra leaned forward excitedly.

“That’s great!” Bon Bon exclaimed.

“Ooh, ooh, who is it, Turing?” Lyra asked.

Then they heard a high-pitched giggle, and both turned and shouted when they saw Pinkie Pie standing right next to their table.

“Oh, I think I know who she means!” Pinkie said, grinning broadly.

“Pinkie?!” Bon Bon shouted. “When did you get here?!”

Turing tilted her head at that. “She has been here for the last three minutes and twenty-two seconds. You did not notice her.”

“Why didn’t you say anything?” Bon Bon cried. “Either of you?!”

“She did not say ‘hello.’”

“And I just didn’t want to interrupt!” Pinkie added.

Turing leaned closer to Pinkie Pie. “Pinkie Pie, I have an inquiry regarding your impressions of--”

Pinkie cut her off, holding up a hoof. “I know what you’re going to ask, and I think you should just go ask her yourself.” Her grin turned sly, and she placed a paper on the table, sliding it over to Turing Test as she wiggled her eyebrows. “Here’s her address. Go and get her, you castiron Casanova.”

***

Turing Test slowed her jets and descended to the ground below. This area, the Northwestern Badlands, was surrounded by long, flat plains littered with boulders, scarred by deep gorges, and bordered by mountains. Small, scrubby plants grew sporadically, as did occasional trees. The atmosphere there was arid and dusty, but the temperature in late winter was still fairly cold.

Small hiking trails crisscrossed the land and, here and there, one could see small ranger outposts or observation towers. Turing, however, was concerned with a lone cabin at the center of the valley.

She set down, the roar of her jets fading to a low whine before finally cutting off completely. She folded her wings back into herself and returned to neutral mode as she walked toward the cabin, her hooves gently crunching on the gravel-covered earth.

The cabin was small, wooden, with a few unadorned windows. Many rocks were piled outside, organized by type. Next to the small path up to the front door, Turing saw a sign that read:

University of Manehattan - Department of Geology
Research Station #1

Turing saw the name of the researcher on a small placard that had been inserted into a slot below, and she knew that she’d come to the right place.

She went to the door, raising a hoof. For some reason, she hesitated. In part, she wished that she had come with support from Pinkie, but Pinkie had said that she had to stay behind to meet her sister Marble Pie, who was apparently going on a trip around Equestria after making a stop in Ponyville.

Turing decided that she’d come all this way; it was illogical to turn back now. She knocked lightly on the door and stepped back.

The door opened, and a familiar gray earth pony mare with a purple mane and dull greenish-blue frock stepped out. Her eyes widened momentarily when she saw Turing Test standing before her. After a moment of silence between the two, in her usual deadpan voice, she said “Hello, Turing Test.” She blinked. “It’s nice to see you.”

Turing Test’s ears twitched. “Hello, Maud Pie.”

To be continued...

Author's Notes:

Ship ahoy!

Some notes: two very minor background ponies mentioned in this chapter are Pokey Pierce and Lucky. Pokey is best known for popping balloons at parties, while Lucky is best known for looking like Doctor Whooves.

References!:

-The "Draw Me Like One of Your Prench Girls" pose is referencing the meme started by the scene in Titanic where Rose asks Jack to draw her like, well, you know.

-Lyra and Bon Bon's conversation about Berry Punch trying to hook up with Lucky ending with “Wow! She was up all night to get Lucky?” is a pretty blunt reference to the Daft Punk song "Get Lucky," which I'm pretty sure most of you have heard by now.

-Turing Test references getting a gift from Maud. Though it will be addressed in the next chapter, Turing Test received a gift from Maud Pie for Hearth's Warming in my story The Iron Ho-Ho-Horse: Everything's Merrier With Robots! It was a piece of rose quartz shaped like a heart.

-It is also mentioned that Pinkie Pie is staying in Ponyville to greet her sister Marble Pie. That's a reference to another story of mine told from Marble's point of view, Marble's Horizon. It was a nominee in two categories for Everfree Northwest's Scribblefest writing contest, and it is a story I am extremely proud of. If you haven't read it yet, please consider giving it a look.

As usual, thanks for reading!

Touch

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Maud Pie stared back at Turing Test for a moment, her eyes blinking slowly, before she finally replied in her usual monotone, “Hello, Turing Test. It’s nice to see you.”

Turing Test nodded. “It is also nice to see you, Maud Pie.”

The two continued standing there in silence for a few moments, a light breeze stirring up the dust on the bare ground around them.

Maud turned slightly and gestured to her cabin. “Do you want to come in?” she asked.

“If that is all right with you, then yes.”

Maud nodded and held open the door for Turing Test. She had a circular parcel with her as well as a small pouch hung around her neck, but otherwise she was apparently traveling light. She carried these things with her toward the cabin.

“Oh, and sorry about the mess. I didn’t know I’d have company.”

Turing Test didn’t expect Maud to be a messy sort of pony, but once she entered the small cabin, she saw what she’d meant.

Though the simple cabin was plain and unadorned, rock samples of every kind littered each table and desk and many different places on the bare, wooden floor. The samples were labelled, though what system of organization had been used to arrange them, if any, eluded Turing as she glanced around. Granted, she didn’t know much about rocks to begin with, but she was sure that Maud would explain if she asked.

Aside from the rocks, the place was just an ordinary, rudimentary cabin. There was a simple bed in one corner of the room. A table was next to the bed, and upon it there was a small cardboard box with some cloth inside. The box was labelled “Boulder’s Bed.” There was a kitchenette with a simple oven, stove, and sink, where a single dish was on the countertop. At the center of the room was a plain, wooden table. There were two stools on either side of it, and though it was the only eating space in the cabin, there were more rock samples and some papers on it, which indicated that Maud had been using it both for meals and for work.

This was where Maud did her work: a simple, one-room cabin.

Turing Test gently sat on one of the stools, testing it with her weight to make sure it would support her. Once she was satisfied that it would (they were apparently far sturdier than they looked), she rested her whole weight upon it and watched as Maud went to the kitchenette.

“I’m going to make tea,” Maud said.

“Understood.”

Turing Test was used to ponies offering her food or drink as a course of habit, even when they knew she wasn’t able to consume them. It was customary for organics, of course, so she didn’t mind, but it did strike her as a little odd that they could not remember such a basic thing. After all, pegasi didn’t ask earth ponies to go flying, so why should organics ask her if she’d like some tea or a snack?

And yet here was Maud Pie making tea and not offering her a cup. It was odd to not receive the offer, and yet strangely refreshing.

Maud Pie left the tea kettle on the stove and sat down across from Turing Test at the table.

“I didn’t know you were coming to visit,” Maud said.

“I apologize for the suddenness of my visit. Is my presence unwanted?”

Maud shook her head. “You’re welcome here. I just don’t know why you came.”

“It was a matter of great importance to me. Perhaps I was impatient, but I simply did not wish to wait for an answer.”

Maud raised an eyebrow at her.

“I apologize. Allow me to clarify my meaning.”

She tapped her chin, organizing her thoughts for a moment before she continued.

“In the time since our last interaction, many things have happened. I have achieved greater success with interpersonal relationships, friendships, and emotional depth. Though I still have difficulty with interaction, I believe I am making progress. One of my greatest achievements is my ability to feel affection. To feel such positivity in the presence of others has given my existence a far greater quality than I had anticipated.”

Maud continued to sit, watching Turing stoically, the blinking of her eyes her only movement.

“Affection and friendship have made me curious about other relationships. It was during a visit with Princess Cadance in the Crystal Empire that I made inquiries about the nature of romantic relationships.”

A normal pony might not have noticed, but Maud’s slow, regular breathing was interrupted by her momentarily drawing in a slightly sharper breath, pausing a moment, and then going back to her usual breathing. It was a small reaction, but a reaction nonetheless. What it meant, however, Turing couldn’t say.

For a moment, she wasn’t sure if she should continue… and yet now she didn’t see how she could stop. Perhaps this was the “Point of No Return” she’d heard ponies mention before.

“I will be brief, Maud Pie. I began to seek potential romantic partners, but I was unable to determine who might be compatible with me. After some assistance from my friends, I determined that you, Maud Pie, possess many of the qualities I seek. We likewise seem to share many similar characteristics that could theoretically be conducive to a suitable match. Still, I had no reason to believe you would accept me, until I recalled your recent Hearth’s Warming Gift to me.”

Turing switched to U-Mode and levitated the pouch she carried around her neck over her head. She loosened the drawstrings and lifted out the small object, placing it on her hoof.

Maud leaned forward, even though she already knew what it was.

It was a small piece of rose quartz in the shape of a heart.

“You sent this gift to me for Hearth’s Warming, Maud Pie. You indicated that it made you think of me. As the shape is often associated with feelings of affection and even love, I considered the possibility that perhaps you intended the gift as an expression of such feelings.”

Maud sat back up and met Turing’s eyes.

“Please inform me, Maud Pie… am I correct? Do you care for me?”

Maud drew in another deep breath, but nodded.

“Perhaps… romantically?”

Maud’s cheeks flushed the barest color of pink, and the corners of her mouth curved upward gently.

“Uh huh,” she replied. “I do.”

Turing was silent. Her glowing violet eyes fixated on Maud Pie, and her ears twitched up and down.

“Understood,” she replied at last. She tapped her chin a second time, then said, “I had not considered what to do next, Maud Pie. Should we… caress each other?”

Maud’s eyes widened slightly at that. Turing detected an increase in her heart rate.

Maud opened her mouth, but a whistling sound was heard. She turned her head and saw that it was coming from the tea kettle. She pushed her stool back and went to the kettle, pouring herself a cup of tea.

Turing merely sat, watching the slow, meticulous way she made her tea. When at last Maud had finished, she made her way over to the table and set it down, taking a slow sip of it. Her heart rate slowed, and her breathing became normal.

“We don’t have to do anything, Turing,” Maud replied, her voice back to its usual calm, even tone. “To be honest, I’m not really experienced with this sort of situation either. But it might be best if we spend more time with each other before we do anything else.”

Turing Test nodded. “That seems like a good idea. I apologize if I suggested something inappropriate.”

Maud shook her head. “It’s okay.” She took another sip of her tea. “Boulder and I were going to head out to look for rock samples. My rocktoral thesis is all about understanding the different geological strata of different places in Equestria. Right now, I’m studying the Western Badlands to do a survey of the different rocks they have here. If you want, you could join me.”

Turing tilted her head to the side.

“It’s okay if you don’t,” Maud added. “Most ponies don’t really find rocks as interesting as I do.”

But Turing held up a hoof. “Actually, I would like to join you, Maud Pie,” Turing replied. “I enjoy learning new things and would also enjoy spending more time with you. I was simply curious as to whether or not such an outing would constitute a ‘date’ or not.”

Maud tapped her own chin at that. “Huh. I don’t know.” She shrugged. “Sure.” She took a long drink from her cup. “While we look, you can tell me about how things have been in Ponyville. Pinkie writes me letters a lot, but she doesn’t always explain things very well. I’d like to know how you’ve been.”

Turing nodded. “Understood. Then we will look for rocks and have a conversation for our date. I hope it will be enjoyable.”

“I do too.” Maud finished her tea and placed the cup in the sink. She went to her bed and reached underneath it, retrieving her saddlebag. She also reached into her pocket and held out Boulder, patting him lightly.

“I hope you don’t mind me bringing Boulder,” Maud said. “I don’t like to leave him alone at home on these trips.” She held him up for Turing Test to see.

“Hello, Boulder,” Turing said, bowing to the little pebble as she held it in her hoof. “I look forward to enjoying your company today as well.”

Maud held Boulder close to her ear, nodding slightly. “Boulder’s a little unsure about you still, but he just needs to get to know you. Don’t worry, though; he takes a little time to warm up to other ponies.”

Turing placed a hoof to her chest. “I will do my best to earn his approval.”

Maud continued watching her, blinking slowly once more before giving Turing another half smile.

***

The pair of them came over a ridge, and Turing glanced all around her, taking in the sight of the surrounding terrain. Mesas, buttes, gullies, and ravines scarred the land. They were marked by colorful bands of gray, then white, then darker gray, then red, and so on.

“I have never been in a place like this before, Maud Pie,” Turing Test said. “It is very different from Ponyville.”

Maud slowly negotiated the steep side of the sloping hill as she descended into a ravine. Turing followed her, the mechanical whirring of her legs echoing through the narrow, rocky corridor.

“This place has a lot of diversity when it comes to rocks,” Maud said. “It’s because of all the different geological strata that formed after repeated sediment settling and erosion. The relatively thin regolith layer makes it easy to examine them up close.”

“I am not certain I understand, Maud Pie,” Turing Test said, coming up alongside her. “My dictionary does not contain an entry for the term ‘regolith.’”

“It means the top layer of soil that covers rock layers.” She paused and pointed at the ground. Turing watched her as she dug at the ground with her hoof, scraping away the thin soil and almost instantly exposing solid rock underneath it.

“I see. That would explain why there are few large plants in this area.”

Maud nodded.

“You also said that these layers, which you call strata, were formed by settling. Then they were at one time underwater?”

Maud nodded again. She went to the wall of the ravine and ran her hoof along the rough stone. “This is a layer of sandstone. Other researchers found fossils of shellfish and other sea creatures. A long time ago, this place wasn’t a desert. It was an ocean.”

Turing’s ears rose at that. She glanced upward and saw the dozen or so layers of rock that were above the one Maud had indicated.

“How long ago was such an event, Maud Pie?”

“At least 47 million years ago,” Maud replied.

Turing wasn’t often prone to surprise, and yet she felt it then. The idea that such an event had occurred so long ago…

“Turing?” Maud asked, tapping her on the shoulder. “Are you okay?”

Turing faced her. “I apologize, Maud Pie. I was simply struck by the idea that such an event occurred so long ago in the past. Celestia is herself slightly older than 1000 years. Twilight Sparkle described an exhibit in the Manehattan Hall of Science which contained an ancient pony from 50,000 years ago. And yet such events are miniscule compared to the idea that an entire ocean once existed here many millions of years ago. It is strange to compare it to my own existence, which has spanned less than a single year.”

“Mm-hmm,” Maud said. “I think it’s pretty neat too.” She then turned and continued to walk down the corridor.

Maud Pie’s knowledge is substantial. Turing said to herself as she followed in step behind her. In that respect, she is like Twilight Sparkle. And also not like her. I must learn more from her.

Maud paused and looked down. “Hmm,” she murmured. She lifted a sizable boulder gently to the side and peered down at a small, glinting rock that was embedded in the ground. With a nod, she reached into her saddlebag and retrieved a small trowel and a pickaxe. Ever so gently, she dug out around the rock until more of it was uncovered. She then took her pickaxe to it and chipped off a chunk of it. Turing watched her in silence as she worked.

At last, Maud held the small rock aloft. “This looks like gold, but--”

“--but it is not.”

Maud’s eyes widened slightly. “Right. Huh… most ponies can’t tell.”

“I have the ability to perform spectrographic analysis using sensors in my ocular lenses. I do not know what it is, but its spectrum does not match that of gold.”

Maud gave another half smile. “It’s iron pyrite. It’s a sulfide mineral that forms naturally in a lot of different rocks. It’s not rare, but this is the first time I’ve found it in this area. Interesting.” She took out a plastic bag and a marker, bagging the sample before labeling it and putting it in her bag again.

“I’ve been trying to find other rocks and minerals in this part of the badlands. In addition to the clay, shale, and sandstone you typically find, I’ve discovered gneiss, peridotite, garnet amphibolite, and even a chunk of ilmenite.”

Turing tilted her head at that.

“That last one made me think of you, because it has titanium in it.”

“Oh.” Turing lifted her foreleg, examining it. “Then, at some point, I was a rock?”

“No. You were many rocks,” Maud said. “The different metals you’re made of, your hooves, and even your eyes are all made of different rocks.”

Turing slowly put her foreleg down and lowered her head. “It is strange for me to think about it, Maud Pie,” she said quietly. “The materials that were used to create me were once dug up from the ground, refined, and forged to make up the different parts of me. At what point did I stop being rocks and become something else? Or perhaps I still am no more than a collection of such things.”

Maud shook her head. “Rocks are old and they don’t change much, but they do change, eventually. That’s where metamorphic rocks come from. Besides,” she added, “organic ponies are made of rocks too, in part. Carbon, iron, phosphorous… you can find those in rocks and in ponies. We’re not that different, if you think about it.” She took Boulder out of her pocket and pet him gently. “Isn’t that right, Boulder?”

Turing was quiet, but she raised her head and lifted her ears again. “That is a wise perspective, Maud Pie. In a way, then, Boulder and you and I as well are all connected in some way.”

“Mm-hmm,” Maud replied, returning Boulder to her pocket. “But you’re more like a rock than most other ponies, Turing. That’s one of the things I like about you.”

Turing was about to reply when Maud gently reached over and placed her hoof on the side of Turing’s face. The gray mare gave her a small smile and took in a slightly deep breath before letting it out.

“Thank you, Maud Pie.” She glanced down at Maud’s hoof, which was still touching her face. “You are touching me.”

“Yes,” she replied flatly. “Do you want me to stop?”

“That is not necessary. Do you wish for me to reciprocate?”

“If you want to.”

Turing wasn’t certain of exactly what she should do next, but she decided that perhaps imitating what Maud was doing might be for the best. She reached out and placed her own hoof gently on the side of Maud’s face.

“Mmm,” Maud hummed, rubbing her cheek against Turing’s hoof. “It’s smooth.”

She lingered for a moment, then moved her hoof from Turing’s face and stepped back, continuing to survey the ravine.

Turing merely stood there for a moment as she glanced down at her hoof.

Strange, she said to herself, that such a short moment of physical contact elicits such a strong reaction from my cognitive function. I wonder, did Maud enjoy that as well? I will ask her at an appropriate time.

***

After gathering more rock samples that afternoon, the sun began to set and the badlands became steadily colder as an icy winter wind blew across the rocky terrain. Maud and Turing made their way back toward the cabin, passing by a tall, wooden observation tower.

“Hey!” came a shrill voice.

Maud and Turing Test looked up to see that an earth pony mare wearing a circular green hat and khaki jacket was looking over the railing at them.

“Hello, Jelly Stone,” Maud said, raising her voice loud enough to be heard, yet somehow not loud enough to quite be considered yelling.

“Don’t just say ‘Hello, Jelly Stone’ at me like that!” the mare shouted, sticking her nose in the air. The mare was yellow with a flaming orange mane and tail and emerald eyes. “Just who or what is that with you?!”

Maud blinked slowly, glanced over at Turing Test, then back up at the Ranger. “That’s Turing Test.”

“What in Equestria is a Turing Test?”

“She is,” Maud replied. “I just told you that.”

“Hello, Ranger Jelly Stone,” Turing Test said, deciding to speak up. She waved a hoof at the ranger who just gawked at her. “I am a robot: a mechanical pony.”

“W-well, what are you doing here?! Are you some kind of new-fangled thing from Manehattan?!”

“No. I am from Ponyville. And I am here to visit Maud Pie to attempt to initiate a romantic relationship.”

Jelly Stone gasped, her face turning red. “What what whaaat?!” she exclaimed. “Maud Pie, is that true?!”

Maud glanced over to Turing Test, then back up at Jelly Stone. “Yes. I guess you could say she’s my girlfriend.”

Jelly Stone laughed nervously. “Y-your… heh heh, you’re not serious are you?” She waved a hoof dismissively, shaking her head. “No, no, you’re just pulling my leg! Nopony would have some… some machine as a girlfriend!”

Maud raised an eyebrow. “Why not? Your last boyfriend needed batteries.”

Jelly Stone turned an even deeper shade of red. “What what whaaat?! N-no! I don’t-- who told you about that?!”

“You did.” Maud smirked. “Just now.”

“Ugh!” Jelly Stone groaned, rolling her eyes. “You really are a pain in the flank, Maud Pie! Well, go take your rocks and make sure that clunky machine pony doesn’t damage anything in the Park!”

She turned to go back inside the observation tower.

Turing waved her hoof. “It was nice to--”

The door slammed roughly.

“--meet you,” Turing finished. “Ah. I do not think she likes me.”

Maud shrugged and continued on her way back to the cabin as Turing followed. “She’s nice, but she’s too excitable. She cares a lot about the park though.”

“Park… Maud Pie, most parks I know are filled with trees and benches. This place lacks both.”

“This is a National Park. Ponies come here to look at the nature. Jelly Stone is a Park Ranger, so she tries to keep it clean and safe.”

“I see.” They continued in silence for a few moments. “You mentioned that her boyfriend also operated on batteries? By any chance, is he also a robot? Perhaps we could engage in a ‘double date.’”

Maud turned to look at her, raising an eyebrow. “That was a joke.”

“Oh? I do not understand the meaning.”

Maud paused, rubbing her chin. “Well, I meant…”

Turing listened with interest as Maud explained her meaning.

“I see. Thank you for explaining it to me.”

“You’re welcome,” Maud said as they continued walking. As they came up over another hill, the cabin came into view.

“I am not certain if it is relevant, Maud Pie, but I am also capable of such an action.”

“What action?” Maud asked, looking to her.

“Allow me to demonstrate.” Turing paused, stiffening her body. There was a slight change in the pitch of the electrical hum she produced, and her whole body began to vibrate, kicking up a small cloud of dust as she did so.

Maud’s eyes were slightly widened as she stared quietly for a very long time after the demonstration.

At last, she simply said, “That’s good to know.”

They at last reached the cabin and went inside. Maud hefted her saddlebags off and began to remove the samples, placing them on whatever free surfaces she could find. As she laid the final sample on the window sill, she grunted and rubbed her back.

“Are you all right, Maud Pie?” Turing Test asked.

“Mm-hmm,” she said making a face. “I’m just a little sore. I’ve been carrying a lot of rocks, and they’re heavy. I wrote a poem about it.”

“Interesting. May I hear it?”

Maud paused, looking up as she recalled the poem. She cleared her throat:

“Rocks are heavy.
The wind is light.
Some rocks wish to fly.
The wind helps them,
piece by piece.
Erosion.”

Turing’s ears twitched. “I understand. You are very talented, Maud Pie.”

“So are you,” Maud said, turning to face her. “I like the way you tell jokes. Besides Pinkie Pie, you’re the only pony who makes me laugh.”

Turing tilted her head. “Is that so? I am glad. Without your assistance, however, I am not certain that I would have been able to develop a sense of humor at all. Even now, many ponies do not seem to understand my style of joking.”

“Well, I do.” She grinned slightly. “Do you have any new jokes?”

“One moment. Accessing…” She tapped her chin for a moment, then proceeded. “Two muffins were sitting together in the oven. One of them says absolutely nothing, as muffins are not sentient. They merely sit in the oven for 10 minutes at a temperature of 200 degrees centigrade until they are baked, removed from the oven, allowed to cool, and then eaten.”

Maud chuckled slightly, then grunted again, wincing as she did so.

“Are you certain you are all right, Maud Pie? Perhaps I can assist you.”

Maud shook her head, but continued rubbing her back. Turing Test went over to her and placed her hoof on the spot Maud was rubbing, gently pushing it herself.

Maud let out a soft sigh. “That feels nice. Can you keep doing that?”

Turing nodded and kneaded the spot. “Is that all right, Maud Pie?”

Maud nodded, but held up a hoof. “Hold on. Would you mind rubbing my back a little?”

Turing shook her head. “Not at all.”

Maud pulled off her frock and went to the simple bed. She lay on it, stretching out on her belly. Turing went next to her, but hesitated.

“Maud Pie, are you certain I can do an adequate job? Also, I am not always aware of how much strength to use and I do not wish to injure you--”

“It’s fine,” Maud said. She closed her eyes. “I trust you.”

Turing Test still hesitated a moment, but then gently applied her metal hooves to Maud’s back. She began to rub and knead in much the same way she had seen Pinkie Pie knead dough at Sugarcube Corner, hoping it would be adequate. She was careful not to apply too much pressure, knowing that her strength was more than enough to injure a pony if she didn’t exercise caution.

Despite her misgivings, however, it was apparently effective. Maud let out a long, contented moan as the metal hooves gently massaged the tense, sore spots on her back.

Maud Pie is allowing me to touch her in this manner. It seems she finds this pleasurable. I did not intend for this to be sensual, but I wonder if it is being construed that way. The spa my friends occasionally visits also provides such a service with no romantic overtures.

She scanned Maud’s biometrics.

Analysis complete: Maud Pie’s pulse has quickened and she appears to have greater blood flow to her face as well as a slight increase in body temperature. It is possible she views this action as more than platonic. Though that was not my intention, I also feel satisfied that she is allowing me to touch her this way. Curious…

“A little more to the left, please,” Maud said. Her voice was still the same monotone as usual, but there was a slight increase in her pitch that Turing’s keen ears detected.

“Understood,” Turing replied, and she dutifully moved to the spot Maud indicated.

Touch.

Organics seem to value it greatly. I wonder how it must feel to them.

At last, Maud pushed herself up and gently pushed Turing’s hooves away. She let out a satisfied sigh and picked her frock up off of the floor, dressing again before she went to the kitchenette.

“That was very nice, Turing,” she said. “I feel much better.”

“I am glad to help, Maud Pie. In truth, it was an experience for me too. I am not certain how to explain it, but I also enjoyed touching you.”

Maud paused, even as she placed a pot of water on the stove, and looked back at her.

“Ah. Did I say something inappropriate?”

Maud did not answer, but merely went over to her and hugged her.

She held her like that for several long moments, though Turing wasn’t certain why, before returning to her work.

Turing watched her as she made a simple dinner of stone soup with a small piece of bread. She sat across from her and watched her eat it. While Maud ate her supper, Turing Test told her more about the things that had happened since they’d last seen each other. She told her about Grace and Glory, befriending Fluttershy and Discord, traveling to Manehattan and then to Trottingham, befriending Applejack after helping on her farm, celebrating Hearth’s Warming, visiting the Crystal Empire, and finally the events that had led her to Maud’s doorstep.

Maud mostly listened in silence, occasionally stopping to ask questions. “Besides making friends, what else have you been doing?” she asked.

“Mostly, I have been studying magic with Twilight Sparkle. I am improving in some areas, but I still do not have her skill. However, I was able to learn some shield magic from Shining Armor during my visit.”

To prove her point, she switched to U-Mode and Maud suddenly bumped her nose on a thin, glowing barrier that had been placed over her soup bowl as she tried to sip from it. She raised an eyebrow at Turing Test, but Turing could tell she wasn’t really angry. Regardless, Turing removed the shield and returned to neutral mode. After that, Maud continued eating in silence, apparently considering all the information Turing had told her.

The silence was finally broken when Maud asked, “So, Turing, why are you here?”

Turing tilted her head. “Is that a philosophical question?”

Maud shook her head and took another sip of her soup. “What I mean is that I know you want to experience a romantic relationship, but I don’t really know why you picked me.”

“I see.” Turing leaned forward over the table. “As I stated earlier, you have many qualities I find compatible. Or, putting it another way, there are many things that I like about you.

“You speak very plainly, which makes it easy to understand your meaning. You say what you mean, and while your facial expressions and vocal communication are not very dynamic, I am always certain of your sincerity. Furthermore, I admire your devotion to your interest and your willingness to share it with others, even though they do not share your enthusiasm. Additionally, I am happy that you seem to find me aesthetically pleasing and that you accept my status as a robot, which many organics find difficult to cope with.”

Maud’s half smile returned. “I like a lot of the same things about you. I wish more ponies would just say what they mean, like you do. And even though I don’t express myself the same way other ponies do, it doesn’t seem to bother you. Besides, you’re still a pony, and I think how you look makes you interesting, even if not everypony thinks so.”

“In actuality, many ponies seem to find my appearance disturbing.”

Maud reached out and patted Turing’s outstretched hoof. Their eyes met.

“Don’t listen to them. You’re beautiful, Turing.”

They stayed like that, facing each other, before Maud removed her hoof and finished her dinner. It grew darker as she lit a lantern and catalogued her remaining rock samples, then prepared her bed.

“That parcel you brought with you,” Maud said, breaking the silence as she pointed at the package, “is that your generator?”

Turing nodded. “I apologize for being presumptuous, but I decided that it may be wise to have a suitable means of recharging myself if I stayed for an extended period of time. However, if you wish, I can leave and allow you to sleep. Or, with your permission, I can enter sleep mode until morning. I can stand in one corner or even outside the cabin with my eyes deactivated to avoid disturbing you.”

But Maud merely shook her head. She placed Boulder in his little bed box and got into the bed, then moved over slightly and patted the spot next to her.

“You… wish for me to stay there?”

Maud nodded. “But only if you want to.”

“Maud Pie, I… am I to understand that…”

Maud shook her head. “I just want to be next to you. I don’t usually do cuddling, but I think I might like it with you.”

Turing wasn’t certain this was a good idea, but she’d come to learn more about relationships, and here was a pony inviting Turing to be closer to her. Perhaps it would be best to accept Maud’s offer.

“Understood. One moment.”

She approached the side of the bed and gently began to ease her hooves into it. She gingerly stepped in, noticing the thin, firm mattress sank but not as much as she thought it would. It was as hard as a rock, and Turing found it fitting for Maud. She eased in and rested her head on the pillow.

“This is the first time I have ‘slept’ in a bed,” she told Maud. “It is… odd.”

Maud snickered. She reached over Turing to the lantern. She opened the lid and blew it out, causing the room to go almost totally black, save for Turing’s glowing eyes. Maud lay down next to Turing again, the warm violet glow of the mechanical mare’s eyes illuminating her stony face.

Maud moved closer to Turing, snuggling up next to her until her body was pressed against hers, and closed her eyes.

“Maud Pie?” Turing asked. “Are you comfortable? I know that my body is not soft or warm like an organic pony’s. I will not be offended if it is not comfortable.”

“Mm-mm,” Maud murmured, shaking her head. “It isn’t uncomfortable at all…”

Turing continued to lie motionless as Maud settled in next to her. Gradually her slow breathing became ever slower, ever more rhythmic. She was asleep, cuddling next to Turing Test as naturally as a filly sleeping next to her mother.

I am not certain if I should enter sleep mode or not. I do not think Maud Pie would mind. Shutting off my eyes may help her sleep more soundly.

It was then that she realized that she didn’t want to turn off her eyes. She wanted to watch the mare next to her sleeping. She wanted to continue to hear her breathing. And now, with this body pressed against hers, she became aware of something else:

Maud’s heart.

It was beating slowly, steadily, and Turing could feel the soft, rhythmic cadence of it against her hull now that Maud was curled up next to her. Before that moment, Turing had merely considered the beating of a heart to be a biometric to detect the health and perhaps emotional status of organics. But now…

Something about that sound, the closeness of it, the rhythm, the fact that it belonged to Maud… somehow this sound was special.

Analyzing cognitive function… cognitive loop detected. I am feeling something. However, I am unable to determine what it is. I am only able to determine that I… like it. I do not wish to enter sleep mode. I wish to experience this.

She hesitated for a moment, but then gently, ever so slowly, draped a foreleg over Maud.

Maud stirred slightly in her sleep, but even though she was unconscious, she lightly took hold of Turing’s foreleg, murmuring slightly as she laid her hoof on it.

Touch. Turing considered that word. Organics value it so much that they seek it even in a state of unconsciousness. It must be a wonderful sensation.

And yet, I…

She put the thought aside, instead focusing on the mare next to her. For the moment, she decided, that was more important.

***

As the light of dawn seeped in through the windows, Maud stirred, her eyelids fluttering, and she awoke, slowly opening her eyes to see Turing Test still lying next to her, her eyes still activated.

“Good morning,” she intoned.

“Good morning, Maud Pie,” Turing replied. “Are you well rested?”

She nodded and sat up, rubbing her eyes, before glancing over to where Boulder still lay in his own little bed.

“Maud Pie, shall I--”

“Shhh,” Maud said, holding a hoof to her lips. “Boulder’s still asleep,” she whispered, “and he gets cranky when he wakes up early. Give him a few more minutes.”

Turing nodded and began again, this time more quietly. “Maud Pie, shall I prepare breakfast for you?”

Maud shook her head. “I like to do it myself. It helps me wake up more.”

She went to the kitchenette and began to prepare a pot of oatmeal as well as a fresh pot of coffee. As she did so, Turing merely stood by, watching her.

“You were awake when I woke up. Didn't you sleep?”

“Negative. Instead of entering sleep mode, I opted to watch you as you slept.”

Maud slightly raised an eyebrow at that. “You watched me sleep all night?”

Turing nodded.

“Why?”

“I simply found the sight interesting. It made me feel… pleasant.” She tapped her chin, reconsidering the phrasing. “Peaceful.”

Maud blinked, and then smiled, apparently satisfied with that answer.

“I apologize if my behavior was inappropriate.”

“It's all right,” Maud said. “It is a little strange, but I guess I don't mind.”

As Maud turned back to making breakfast, Turing's ears twitched.

“There is someone approaching your cabin,” she said. “They are running, so it may be urgent.”

Sure enough, the clatter and crunch of galloping hooves on gravel was heard, followed by a frantic pounding of hooves on the door.

Maud opened it to reveal Jelly Stone, who was standing there panting and out of breath.

“Maud Pie! Oh, it's just terrible!” she cried. “There's been a--”

“Shh,” Maud said, again putting her hoof to her lips. “You'll wake Boulder.”

“What what what?!” she exclaimed. “This is no time for--”

“It is too late: he is already awake,” Turing said from inside the cabin, causing Jelly Stone to peer around Maud. Turing held the little pebble aloft in her hoof. “And you have made him cranky.”

Maud sighed as she turned back to Jelly Stone. “Well, I hope you're happy now.”

Jelly Stone puffed out her reddening cheeks indignantly. “Y-you two are-- ugh!” She took a deep breath, calming herself. “Listen, there’s been a landslide! Two of our rangers were examining an alcove for signs of erosion when the side of the rock wall came down and blocked them in! We’ve sent somepony to get more help, but the nearest small town is an hour away, and we don’t know if the rangers have enough air to last that long!”

Maud’s eyes widened.

Jelly Stone took her hoof. “Please, Maud Pie!” she pleaded. “I-- we need your help clearing the debris!”

Maud gave a firm nod. “Okay.”

Turing Test trotted over. “I will also assist you,” she said.

Jelly Stone nodded. “Good. We could use an extra set of hooves.”

Maud took Boulder from Turing and patted him. “Come on, Boulder. I could use the moral support,” she added, and deposited him in her pocket.

***

The three mares made their way to the site of the landslide, which apparently occurred a few short kilometers to the north of Maud’s cabin. They came to the rim of a deep canyon. Looking down, they saw a river rushing through the middle of the area.

“Okay, there’s a path going down to the bottom,” Jelly Stone said. “Just be careful; the ground is a little unstable.”

“I’ve been through here before,” Maud intoned, peering down the steep sides. “I found some samples of carbonatite, amphibolite, monzonite, nepheline syenite, and a really great sample of luxullianite.” She took on a far-off, dreamy look.

“Maud Pie, I believe we should hurry.”

Maud nodded. “Sorry. I got caught up in the memorites.” She blinked. “Memories. Sorry.”

“Well, if you’re done,” Jelly Stone said impatiently, “then let’s get to the path and--”

Maud held up a hoof. “That’s okay. I know a faster way.”

With startling speed, Maud suddenly leaped over the side of the canyon rim, drawing a gasp from Jelly Stone. Then, as Jelly Stone and Turing watched, she nimbly hopped from stone to stone, hoofhold to hoofhold, as she rapidly descended down the sheer, nearly vertical wall.

“W-wow…” Jelly Stone breathed, drawing herself up, her cheeks reddening slightly. Then she turned to Turing Test and frowned. “Well, come on, metal pony. I guess we’re taking the slow way down, unless you can hop down too.”

Turing shook her head. “It would be unwise to follow Maud Pie’s path. However, I have my own way. Engaging P-Mode.”

Before Jelly Stone could ask what she meant, Turing’s wings suddenly appeared, sliding out from the compartment in her back, and her jets came to life. Once they were ready, she took off and used them to make an aerial descent into the canyon.

Jelly Stone heaved a sigh and ran for the nearby cliffside path.

At the bottom, the area had a bit more of the scrubby plants that grew along the shores of the river. Surrounded by the towering stone walls and buttes, Maud paused to take in the beauty of the place before she heard the low roar of Turing’s jets as she descended.

Turing set down next to Maud and cut her jets, folding up her wings.

“I’ve never seen you fly before,” Maud said. “You look too heavy to do it. Like a rock.”

“‘Rocks are heavy / The wind is light,’ Maud Pie.”

Maud nodded. “Right. Well, let’s find that landslide.”

“One moment,” Turing said, twitching her ears. A moment later she said, “I can detect the sounds of other ponies a short distance upstream. I believe they are coming from the team of rescuers. Please follow me.”

The two of them ran along the bank of the river before coming upon a pair of rangers standing near a pile of dirt and rubble.

One of the rangers, a unicorn stallion with a mustache, turned his head. “Oh, Miss Maud Pie! Thank goodness you’ve come!” he exclaimed. Then his eyes bulged as he saw Turing Test next to her. “And um… what is that?”

“Hello, Joshua Tree. Hello, Glacier Bay. This is Turing Test,” Maud said. “She’s a machine pony. She’s also my girlfriend.”

The ranger, Joshua Tree, screwed his face up, his mustache curving to the side as he eyed Turing uncertainly.

“That is true. She slept with me.”

Both rangers cheeks reddened.

Maud simply turned. “You should phrase that differently, Turing,” she monotoned.

“Understood. Clarifying: we went to bed together.”

Maud blinked slowly as the two rangers turned even redder. “Close enough.” She then went over to the landslide, rubbing her chin as she examined the pile of rubble. “The other rangers are trapped in there?”

“Yes,” Joshua Tree said, “but you need to be careful! The rock face is still unstable; I’ve been trying to levitate the rocks out one-by-one, but it’s taking forever, and I’m not sure that even that won’t cause another rockslide!”

The other ranger, Glacier Bay, a pegasus mare, stepped forward. “I just wish I knew if Isle Royale and Mammoth Cave were okay!”

“A moment,” Turing Test said, walking up to the landslide. She tilted her head and twitched her ears. “Beginning auditory scan… complete. Faint breathing and two heartbeats detected. They are alive!”

“Oh, thank goodness!” Glacier Bay replied, placing a hoof to her chest. “Well, we need to get them out, but this landslide is so unstable that I’m not sure if we can without risking somepony else’s safety!”

Turing tapped her chin. “I will conduct a visual analysis of the structural integrity of the area,” she said. Her eyes fixated on the landslide, tracing it from the bottom to the top of the rock wall. It was mostly rocks with some dirt, but it stretched up the tall face of the rock formation from which it had collapsed.

“What do you think, Turing?” Maud said, coming alongside her.

“I believe that I may be able to switch to E-Mode and clear the debris by breaking the rocks apart, but it is very likely that the upper rock wall will continue to collapse as the pressure at the bottom of the rock face is released. With no way to stabilize it, the strategy would be impractical.”

Maud glanced up at the rock wall, then back to Turing Test. “Would two ponies work?” she asked. “One could smash the rocks at the bottom. The other could break apart any other rocks that fell.”

“That would theoretically be effective, but I do not believe there is an organic pony capable of smashing rocks as effectively as I.”

The two nearby rangers began snickering.

“Have I said something amusing?” Turing asked, tilting her head.

Maud didn’t reply verbally, but instead picked up a sizable stone, about the size of a bowling ball. She lifted it easily, then casually tossed it into the air before striking it with her hoof, shattering it to pieces in midair.

A few smaller pieces of gravel from the impact bounced off Turing’s hull with a soft, metallic tapping sound. Her eyes constricted.

“Impressive, Maud Pie. I did not know organics had such abilities. Very well, let us work together.” She swept her hoof at the rockslide. “As stated, one pony must break rocks at the bottom while the other prevents rocks falling from the top from injuring her.”

“Right,” Maud said.

“Before we get our rocks off, do you want to be on the top or the bottom?”

Silence, save for the rushing sound of the water and the sound of two hooves smacking two different faces on two different rangers.

“You know,” Maud said, “it’s adorable that you aren’t doing that on purpose.”

“Apparently not, but thank you for the compliment. Still, we should hurry.”

Maud nodded. “Okay. I’ll smash the bottom rocks. You’re stronger and faster than most ponies, so you should watch for the rocks falling from the top.”

Before Turing could reply, she placed her hoof on Turing’s shoulder, meeting her gaze.

“Keep me safe, okay?” she said.

Turing looked down at the hoof laid gently on her shoulder and then back to Maud.

“Understood,” she said. “Let us begin. Engaging E-Mode.” There was a hiss and a loud sound as the pistons in her legs engaged.

Maud rolled up her sleeves and reared up on her hind legs. With a sound like a jackhammer, she began digging and pounding at the rocks and boulders gathered at the foot of the rock wall. A dust cloud began to form and the debris from her rapidly striking and smashing the rocks built up around her, with some of it falling into the river to be washed away.

Sure enough, as the pile at the bottom began to clear, sizable chunks of the rock face above them came loose and tumbled down. Turing Test leaped high into the air, striking one after another, batting them away or smashing them like they were nothing more than falling leaves.

The sound of hooves was heard and Joshua Tree and Glacier Bay turned to see Jelly Stone galloping over to them.

“I’m here, I’m here!” she exclaimed breathlessly. She stopped to pant. “Now let’s… let’s get started on this job!”

Joshua Tree smiled and stepped aside, pointing to the scene before them.

Jelly Stone gawked. Maud and Turing were working together to clear the rockslide with ease. Most striking was that Maud wasn’t even glancing up from her work; she was trusting that Turing Test would not allow any of the falling rocks to hurt her.

“Impossible…” she breathed.

Soon enough, the rockslide was clear enough to see the alcove. The two trapped rangers peered out, blinking in the sudden sunlight. They looked dusty and had some small cuts and scrapes but otherwise seemed to be fine.

Maud reached out with a hoof. “You’re okay,” she intoned in what she must have thought sounded warm and comforting. One ranger took Maud’s hoof, and she pulled him out as the other rangers led him away. Maud then helped the other. Turing stood back and watched for more falling rocks as she did this.

Glacier Bay couldn’t contain her elation. “You did it!” she cried, leaping into the air.

The sound reverberated throughout the canyon, and a crack formed in the damaged rock wall. A pair of rocks came loose and hurtled down toward the group. As they cried out in fear, both Maud and Turing ran forward, simultaneously leaping at the rocks to deflect them.

Turing merely smashed right through hers, but Maud kicked out with her back hooves, successfully smashing the rock, but ricocheting off it and landing in the shallow waters of the river.

“Maud Pie?” Turing asked, running to the river’s shore. “Are you all right?”

Maud stood and trudged to the shore. She nodded, then shook the excess water from her dampened mane and tail.

“I’m fine. Just wet.” She glanced up and down at the shoreline. “It looks like we did it.”

“Affirmative. Shall we return to your cabin now?”

Maud nodded. “I want to get dry.” Then her stomach gurgled. “Also, I never got to have breakfast. I bet Boulder’s hungry too.” She reached into her pocket. “Aren’t you, Boul--”

She paused, her eyes widening. “Boulder?” She dug around in her wet pocket for a moment more before holding out an empty hoof. “He isn’t there. Where could he have--” She blinked, then glanced back at the river. For the first time in all the time Turing or the rangers had known her, she actually looked worried, as her lips curved into a frown and worry lines creased her brow.

“It seems that Boulder washed out of your pocket when you fell into the river,” Turing surmised. “We must rescue him.”

“What what whaaat?!” Jelly Stone cried, jumping forward. “Don’t be ridiculous; it’s too dangerous! That river gets deeper further downstream! Besides, it’s just a rock any--”

Maud turned and stared at Jelly Stone, her eyes narrowing slightly, silencing her in an instant. Then she turned back to Turing, and took up her hoof in her own hooves.

“Boulder is important to Maud Pie,” Turing stated, turning her eyes to the river, “and, therefore, he is important to me.”

Her eyes whirred as she focused her vision on the spot where Maud fell. “Replaying memory… calculating direction and speed of the water… probable trajectory determined. Now locating…”

Without another word, she turned and took off down the shore, her hooves kicking up dust and dirt as she continued scanning the river. A few hundred meters upstream, she skidded to a halt.

“Engaging U-Mode.” As her horn slid into place, her magic glowed, and something under the water illuminated. A moment later, an object levitated from the rushing water as Turing drew it out. She set the small rock on her outstretched hoof before returning to neutral mode.

A moment later, Maud came up behind her and swept up Boulder, holding him to her chest. “There you are, Boulder,” she said. “I know you like to play, but Camouflage isn’t a water sport.”

She placed Boulder back in her pocket and looked to Turing Test. Her breathing returned to normal, and she gave her another half-smile. “You saved him. Thanks,” she said.

“You are welcome Maud Pie,” Turing replied. “I am glad that I was able to locate him before he reached a deeper part of the river.”

Maud tilted her head. “You can’t swim?”

“Not at all,” Turing said, nodding. “Due to my weight, I cannot remain buoyant. To use a common expression, I would ‘sink like a rock.’”

Maud’s breathing intensified. “You tease,” she said. Slowly, she came over and held Turing in a tight embrace.

“Ah. Hug engaged,” Turing said, returning the hug.

Maud hummed contentedly and pressed her face into the coils of Turing’s mane. “Mmm. Your mane is really warm. It’s soft and smooth, too.”

“It acts to draw heat away from my internal systems.”

Maud continued holding Turing, rubbing her face against her mane.

“Maud Pie?” Turing asked.

“Sorry,” Maud said, finally releasing her and stepping back. “I’m cold, and it feels nice.”

“I am glad. However, we should return to your cabin to dry you and get you fresh clothing in addition to a meal. I do not wish for you to become ill.”

“Okay,” Maud said. She reluctantly ended the hug and began to walk away.

It was then that she noticed that Jelly Stone had caught up and was watching them. She was frowning, and her ears were drooping beneath her round ranger’s hat.

“Hello, Jelly Stone. Is something wrong?” she asked.

“O-oh, um…” She heaved a sigh and gave her a weak smile. “No. No, it’s okay. Thanks for your help.” She took a deep breath as she glanced at Turing. “Both of you.”

Maud nodded, and they both began to walk away.

Turing lingered a moment and looked down at her own hooves. Embracing. She touched her shoulder. Shoulders. She then placed her hoof on a coil of her mane. Warm. Soft. Smooth.

Turing lowered her ears. I cannot avoid this issue. I must inform Maud Pie.

Slowly, she began to follow behind Maud as they made their way out of the canyon.

***

Maud Pie approached her cabin and was almost to her front door when Turing came to a stop and said, “Maud Pie, I apologize, but I need to discuss an issue of significant importance with you.”

Maud paused and turned to face her. “What is it?”

Turing looked down. “Maud Pie… I do not take pleasure in saying this, but I believe it would be best if we do not continue this relationship.”

Maud blinked. “Why?”

Turing held out a hoof. “Touch.”

Maud glanced at her hoof. “You want me to touch your hoof?” she asked, raising an eyebrow.

Turing shook her head. “Negative. I mean that ‘touch’ is the issue.” She put her hoof down and stared back at Maud. “Maud Pie, do you enjoy touching me?”

Maud smiled. “Sure.”

“I had surmised that. You have touched my face, my shoulder, my mane, and displayed on numerous occasions that you enjoy physical closeness and contact with me. And based on my readings of your increased pulse and blood flow as we approached your cabin, I believe you were anticipating more physical contact. Am I correct?”

Maud looked away. “Maybe,” she said quietly. “If you wanted to.”

Turing shook her head. “It is not that I do not wish to. However, I have not properly clarified something to you: I do not have such physical desires. And that is the primary source of the problem.

“Maud Pie, when you touch me, or when I touch you, it seems to give you pleasure. I have previously enjoyed hugging and hoof bumps and other physical interactions for the meanings they held. Through my interactions with other ponies, I have come to appreciate various emotional states. Happiness, affection, amusement, and many others, for instance. These emotions are so potent and so incredible that I am incredulous that I once existed without knowing them. However, these emotions are mental states.

“In contrast, my time with you has led me to consider the physical side of things. In books, I have often read of physical sensations, and now I have witnessed them with you. I do not know what it is to be warm or cold. I do not know smoothness or roughness. My sensors can detect texture and pressure, but these are only data, and they have nothing that equates to ‘sensation.’

“Your vocalizations of pleasure when I massaged your back made me notice such things. Furthermore, last night, while you slept next to me, I could feel your heart beating.” She stepped closer to Maud, placing her hoof on her chest. “I became aware of its rhythm and its significance as a symbol of your existence. I found it pleasant. I listened to it as you slept. I believe that I began to comprehend the significance of physical sensation.

“However, unlike emotions, which I have gradually been able to experience, I am not capable of experiencing physical sensation. I cannot feel the warmth of your body. I cannot feel the softness of your coat or the gentleness of your touch. And… due to my lack of reproductive urges or sensitivity to chemical pheromones, I cannot feel physical desire for you. It is most likely that I will never feel such things.”

Maud reached for Turing’s hoof as it was still pressed against her chest, but Turing withdrew it and stepped back, lowering her gaze. “Maud Pie, you are unique. I enjoy your company, but I believe that I am inadequate as a romantic partner. I believe that it would be best if you had a partner who could appreciate your touch and desire you in return.” She raised her head slightly, the servos in her neck whirring quietly. “I believe I have already discovered a suitable replacement for me.”

Maud tilted her head slightly. “Who?” she asked.

“Jelly Stone,” Turing replied.

Maud frowned. “What?”

“Based on her physical reactions with regard to closeness to you as well as her cool reception to me, especially with regards to our interactions, I believe that she has a ‘crush’ on you and views me as a competitor.” She shook her head. “I do not wish to deprive an organic pony of a relationship with you when I cannot fully appreciate you. You are unique and wonderful and I wish for you to be happy. You should be with Jelly Stone or another pony of your choosing.”

Maud stood there in silence when Turing had finished. She took in a long, deep breath before letting it out with a slowness that could be compared to continental drift.

“Turing,” she said at last, “do you like me?”

“Yes,” Turing replied immediately. “I believe I have stated that.”

“Do you not like it when I touch you?”

“No, Maud Pie. I enjoy the significance of the action. I simply am incapable of taking pleasure in it as an organic pony would.”

“Then, do you not like touching me?”

“As I stated, physical closeness is satisfying for me in a mental way. The sensation of your heart beating was pleasant for me, as were your vocalizations of pleasure when I was rubbing your back. It made me happy to know that I was making you happy.”

“Hmm,” she intoned. She scratched her head. “Does it bother you that you can’t feel things physically?”

“Somewhat. I have become accustomed to the idea that, in some ways, I will never be like organic ponies. But I am more concerned that this disability will make me an inadequate partner for you.”

Maud closed her eyes and took a deep breath. When she opened them, she was smiling. “Then don’t worry about it.”

Turing cocked her head.

“If you worry about what you aren’t,” Maud intoned, “then you might not be able to appreciate what you are. You shouldn’t deny your own happiness just because you can’t experience it like other ponies. I wish you could feel the same things for me that I do for you, but if that means giving you up for somepony else, then it really isn’t important to me.

“Listen, Jelly Stone is just a friend. I’ll talk to her and let her know that I don’t feel the same way. Like I told you, she’s a little too excitable. Most ponies are. I don’t usually get these kinds of feelings about other ponies. But you’re different.

“Turing Test, I like you, not anypony else.” She walked over and put her hoof on Turing’s face. “I like how you mean what you say; I like that you’re quiet, and that you’re unselfish; I like the jokes you tell; I like that you’re strong, but still gentle; and I like that you’re made of different minerals and stones. You’re not like any other pony I know, and I don’t care if you can smile or laugh or feel desire. You being a robot doesn’t make you inadequate; it makes you unique. If you care about me, want to be close to me, and are happy being with me, then that’s enough.

“If you want me to be happy, then just be yourself, because I’m happy being with you.”

Turing’s eyes shifted, and her ears twitched. Slowly, gently, she placed her own hoof on Maud’s face in return. She watched as Maud closed her eyes and held Turing’s hoof in place, next to her.

“Maud Pie… I do not know what to say.”

Maud opened her eyes. “Just tell me: do you want to be with me?”

Turing nodded. “Yes.”

“Okay then.”

With that, she took Turing’s hoof and led her inside the cabin, shutting the door behind them.

A moment later, the door opened a crack as Maud set Boulder down on the front step.

“Play outside for a while,” she intoned, giving a small smile as she patted him. “I’ll come get you later,” she added, and shut the door.

***

The two spent the next few days collecting rock samples, trading jokes for poems, taking in the sights of the badlands, and generally enjoying each other’s company. Each night, Turing lay in bed with Maud snuggling next to her. She counted each embrace, each caress, and each moment as something new to experience.

On the third evening, as the sun began to set, Turing and Maud exited the cabin. Turing’s generator and her heart-shaped piece of rose quartz were both packed and secured to her body.

“Are you sure you have to go?” Maud asked. “You could stay here.”

Turing nodded. “Affirmative. Twilight Sparkle gave me permission to leave Ponyville temporarily, but she will be expecting me to return. I am still learning about friendship and interacting with other ponies, and I must fulfill my directive.” She paused, tapping her chin, before holding out her hoof. “Would you like to come with me? Ponyville is a very nice place to live.”

Maud shook her head. “I have to finish my studies too,” she replied. “Ponyville is nice, but the rocks and geological strata are well documented. There isn’t that much to study, and I want to complete my rocktorate.” She sighed. “I guess we both have responsibilities in our lives right now.”

“Correct,” Turing said. She glanced down, then added, “I will miss you.”

“I’ll miss you too.”

“I… am not certain if I have attained sufficient emotional maturity to determine if I am capable of understanding ‘love,’” she said.

Maud Pie stiffened, raising her head slightly.

“However, I feel something for you. I cannot explain it, but it is more complex than affection. When I am with you, I feel as though I am not so strange, and that there is another pony who understands me, and that I understand as well. Therefore, I wish to tell you that I appreciate you to a highly substantial degree.”

Maud gave her usual half-smile. She leaned in close and placed a kiss on Turing Test’s cheek. She lingered there for a moment before stepping back. “I appreciate you to a highly substantial degree too.”

Turing’s ears twitched. “Acknowledged. Goodbye, Maud Pie.”

She stepped back, spread her wings, and took off into the sky, the setting sun at her back. Below her, a gray mare with a purple mane continued staring after her long after she had disappeared over the horizon.

***

It had been a few hours since Turing had returned, and she’d been strangely quiet. It was nearly time for bed, and Twilight made her way through the halls of her castle until she spotted the open door that led out to her balcony. She peered through the door and saw Turing standing on the balcony, her front hooves resting on the railing.

“Oh, there you are, Turing Test,” Twilight said, coming up behind her. She stood next to her, likewise putting her hooves on the railing. Below, nearly all the cottages and buildings of Ponyville had gone dark. Above, the cloudless night sky was lit up with thousands of stars. The moon had only just begun its trek across the night sky.

“Yes,” Turing replied. “Here I am.”

“Heh,” Twilight chuckled. She stared up at the night sky. “You haven’t said much since you got back. Um… is everything okay? I mean, did everything work out with Maud?”

“Unexpectedly, yes, Twilight Sparkle,” Turing said. “At one point, I was certain that Maud Pie would eventually reject me because of my status as a robot. Specifically, I thought that my inability to experience touch would become an obstacle. However, Maud accepted me, including my limitations, and I believe I now have a greater appreciation for physical interaction among organic ponies. Maud Pie is… special.”

Twilight put her foreleg around her. “That’s really great, Turing,” Twilight said. “You’re lucky to find a special somepony like that.”

“Acknowledged. Additionally, she gave me another present.”

“Oh?” Twilight asked.

Turing slid a small envelope over to her. Twilight levitated it and took out the small piece of paper inside. Carefully scrawled in ink was a poem:

You are no rock.
You are a robot.
But you are gray.
You are hard.
You are quiet.
You are not like gneiss,
But you are nice.
You are like a rock.
My heart was like a rock.
You flew in like wind,
and eroded that part of me.
Now my heart flies on the wind.
Under watchful amethyst eyes,
I sleep.
You are my rock.
Turing Test.

Twilight smiled and put the poem back in the envelope. “I don’t know if I’ll ever get Maud’s poems, but that was sweet of her.”

“I agree. Being with another in that way and being viewed in such a way is a wonderful experience. However,” she said, her ears lowering with a squeak of her hinges, “Maud Pie and I have two separate existences. I do not wish to give up my time in Ponyville or be away from you or my other friends. Similarly, Maud does not wish to leave her studies. Despite our mutual desire to be near to each other, our circumstances will not allow us to do so. Even though I cannot fully experience physical sensations, I find myself missing the closeness of her. I am not certain if my cognitive systems are fully capable of processing this feeling.”

Twilight raised an eyebrow. “What do you mean?”

“I have been running a diagnostic on my system, and no errors have been detected.”

Twilight scratched her head. “Uhh, well, I guess you’re fine, then… right?”

“If I am fine,” Turing whispered, leaning against the railing, “then why do I feel as though some part of me is broken?”

Twilight smiled sadly and heaved a sigh. “I think your internal systems are working perfectly,” she said, patting her on the shoulder. “It’s going to be okay, Turing. Just think about when you’ll see her next!”

Turing nodded slowly. “Acknowledged. I will attempt to do so.”

Twilight let out a long yawn, covering her mouth with her hoof. “I’m going to bed, Turing. Do you want to come inside?”

Turing shook her head. “Not yet. Please have a good night, Twilight Sparkle.”

Twilight nodded as she turned to go. “Same to you, Turing Test.”

As Twilight Sparkle left, Turing Test continued to stand there. She looked up at the stars, noting that they looked the same over Ponyville as they did over the Western Badlands. She found herself wondering if Maud Pie was up that night, looking at the same stars and thinking of her.

She wondered if Maud Pie would miss her touch that night as much as she, in turn, would miss the soft, steady beating of her heart against her hull as she held her throughout the night.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vDBR4tMnL-g

To be continued...

Author's Notes:

Fun fact: I originally was thinking of calling this either "Digital Love" or "Robot Rock," both of which are, you guessed it, Daft Punk songs. If you're asking me, Turing x Maud's ship name ought to be "RobotRock" because, well, seriously, what else could it be??

As you can probably tell by the title, combined with the YouTube video at the end, the main reference here is the song "Touch" by Daft Punk (with Paul Williams). The song is thematic, of course, but there's one part near the end that I was listening to while writing this story that reminded me of Turing Test. If you have annotations turned on, you can see what I mean.

The only other major reference is the names of the rangers. Generally speaking, they're all named after National Parks here in the United States.

"Jelly Stone" is the exception, as she is named after a fictional park, "Jellystone National Park," from the old Yogi Bear cartoons. That name is itself based on Yellowstone National Park. For the others...
Joshua Tree is named for Joshua Tree National Park in California.
Glacier Bay is named for Glacier Bay National Park and Preserve in Alaska.
Isle Royale is named for Isle Royale National Park and Preserve in Michigan (on Lake Superior).
Mammoth Cave is named for Mammoth Cave National Park in Kentucky.

This chapter was fun to write, but also a gigantic pain... writing a romance between two mostly stoic characters was more challenging than I had anticipated. Originally, I'd considered writing a section that involved Diamond Dogs stealing one of Maud's gemstone samples and Turing helping her retrieve it and yadda yadda... but I decided to scrap that and go with the chapter as it is now.

Many thanks to my editing team and particularly to Green, my illustrator, who cranked out two illustrations for it. Also, my editor GenerousGypsy did a quick illustration of his own for Turing's talk with Cadance. It's called "What is Love?" and it can be found in the gallery, which I'm not sure a lot of you knew existed. Thanks, GG!

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Turing Test rounded the corner of the castle hallway and knocked on the door of the library.

“Twilight Sparkle?” she asked, pushing the door open. “You did not notify me of our magic lesson, but it is the appointed time, so I have--”

She stopped in mid-sentence when she saw that Twilight was indeed there, but she was not alone. Spike was there too, sitting on a table next to a towering plate of nachos, no less. But also accompanying her were three all-too-familiar fillies, all engaged in different activities around the spacious library floor.

“Hiya, Turing Test!” Apple Bloom said, waving to her before returning to the potion she was meticulously mixing. Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle likewise glanced up from their work and waved to her.

“Oh, Turing Test!” Twilight exclaimed as she galloped over. “I’m so sorry, but, well, it looks like I double-booked today.”

“That is unsurprising, Twilight Sparkle,” Turing remarked, “as you often read two or more books in a day.”

Ignoring the chuckling from Spike, Twilight shook her head. “No, no, Turing, what I mean is that I accidentally scheduled ‘Twilight Time’ with the Cutie Mark Crusaders at the same time as our magic practice for today.”

Turing nodded, glancing around to see Apple Bloom, Scootaloo, and Sweetie Belle all working on various projects. “Understood. I do not mind their company at all, so we may proceed, if you wish.”

Twilight pursed her lips, glancing back at the Crusaders. “Actually,” she said hesitantly, “could we postpone your magic practice until later?”

Turing tilted her head. “Is that necessary?” she asked. “I was eager to continue my work on shield spells. I appear to have developed some proficiency in the skill since studying with Shining Armor and then again with your guidance.”

As a demonstration, she extended her horn and cast a shield spell, encircling herself in a glowing, translucent bubble, the goldenrod magic slightly illuminating the crystalline walls of the castle.

Twilight tapped the shell of the shield lightly, then rapped on it with her hoof more strongly, feeling the solidity of the spell.

“Impressive! Very solid work, Turing!” Twilight said with a smile. Then she heaved a sigh. “Unfortunately, I think it would be best. I’m already giving my full attention to these little fillies, but given how, um, chaotic their work tends to be, as well as your own magic practice, I’m worried things could get a little out of hoof.” She clasped her hooves together. “I’m sorry, Turing.”

Turing only gave a little bow. “It is all right, Twilight Sparkle. I will practice my spells outside the castle in the meantime.” She turned to the other three. “Good luck with your projects, Apple Bloom, Scootaloo, and Sweetie Belle.”

Turing trotted out of the library, but as she went, Apple Bloom looked up from her work, following her with her eyes.

“Apple Bloom?” Twilight’s voice seemed distant, and Apple Bloom didn’t even acknowledge it. “Apple Bloom, be careful!”

“Huh?” Apple Bloom turned and saw that she had poured almost all of the contents of her test tube into the beaker before her. “Whoa!” she exclaimed, yanking it away.

“Apple Bloom, really,” Twilight sighed, looking down at the beaker. “I told you not to add too much.”

“Yeah, sorry about that,” Apple Bloom replied. She offered Twilight a weak smile. “Well, at least I stopped. No harm, no--”

The beaker erupted, spewing a geyser of green goo all over Twilight, Apple Bloom, and the floor.

“--foul?” Apple Bloom squeaked, wiping the goo from her face. “Uh, sorry about that, Twilight.”

Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle both began to snicker until Twilight shot them a glare. “Keep focusing, girls,” she said, sternly.

She then turned back to Apple Bloom, who was blushing and not meeting her gaze. “It’s all right, Apple Bloom,” Twilight sighed, placing her hoof on the little filly’s shoulder. “Spike, come on, let’s get some cleaner and some towels. We’d better get this stuff mopped up before it congeals and starts sticking to everything.”

“No problem!” Spike said, hopping off the table and joining Twilight as they ran out of the library.

“You okay, Apple Bloom?” Scootaloo asked. “I haven’t seen you mess up a potion like that since we first started having Twilight Time!”

“Yeah,” Sweetie Belle agreed. “I thought you said today’s potion should be an easy one!”

“It is! Well, it was!” Apple Bloom shook her head. “Look, don’t worry about that potion,” she said. “I got distracted by Turing Test!”

Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle blinked.

“She’s not that distracting, Apple Bloom,” Scootaloo said, rolling her eyes. “You don’t have to make excuses.”

“No no no!” Apple Bloom said, waving a hoof. “I meant I got distracted by her flank!”

Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle glanced at each other, then back to Apple Bloom, their eyebrows raised in unison.

“Oh, fer Pete’s sake!” she groaned, throwing her hooves up. “Because she’s a blank flank, I meant!”

“Oh!” Sweetie Belle cried. “You’re right!”

“Hey, yeah!” Scootaloo added. “She is! Just like we were until, well…”

She glanced back at her own flank, now adorned with the lightning bolt set against the shield-shaped symbol that made up her own cutie mark. Her two friends likewise glanced at their own cutie marks, momentarily lapsing into contented sighs.

Apple Bloom shook her head again. “That’s my point!” she cried. “Look, we got our cutie marks in helpin’ other ponies get theirs, right?”

“Right!” Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle exclaimed together.

“An’ Turing Test doesn’t have one, right?”

“Right!” Scootaloo said, her eyes going wide when Sweetie Belle didn’t join her.

“Hm,” Sweetie Belle said, looking down as she rubbed her chin. “I mean, I guess that’s true, but… do robots even get cutie marks?” she asked.

“Huh,” Apple Bloom replied, rubbing her own chin. “I’m not sure, now that I think about it.”

“Well, there’s one way to find out!” Scootaloo said, flashing a grin. “We can just ask her!”

***

Turing Test was focusing on the glowing rectangle in front of her as she moved it back and forth, attempting to master not only the shield but also its mobility. Other ponies might have been distracted by the sound of three eager fillies calling their names, but Turing was nothing if not a multitasker.

“Turing Test! Turing Test!” the Crusaders cried as they ran up to her.

“One moment,” Turing said as she extended the barrier a few more meters away from her before bringing it back to just a few centimeters in front of her face. She disengaged her magic and resumed her neutral mode. “Exercise complete.” She turned to the Crusaders. “How may I assist you, my young friends?”

“Well,” Sweetie Belle began, “we were practicing some stuff for Twilight Time - Apple Bloom was doing potions, I’ve been working on magic, and Scootaloo is making a miniature windmill - and then Apple Bloom saw you talking to Twilight and--”

“Ugh, get to the point!” Scootaloo groaned, rolling her eyes. “Turing Test, do robots get cutie marks?”

Turing was silent for a moment, her ears shifting slightly. “Cutie mark,” she repeated. “You refer to the image which appears on a pony’s flank to signify the unique ability in which they show great proficiency, correct?”

Apple Bloom and Scootaloo looked to Sweetie Belle.

“She means that it shows your special talent,” Sweetie explained.

“Ohhh,” Apple Bloom and Scootaloo said. They looked back up at Turing Test and nodded.

“I see. Then I must reply that I am uncertain.” She placed a hoof to her chest. “Currently, I am the only robot known to exist, though there are most likely others who preceded me. I have no knowledge of them, and therefore I lack any knowledge of them having cutie marks. However, due to my nature as a mechanical being, it is unlikely that I will obtain a cutie mark.”

The three fillies looked down, their ears drooping.

“You seem disappointed by this information. I do not understand why.”

Apple Bloom sighed. “Well, ya know, it’s just that…” She paused, scratching the side of her head as she considered how to word what she wished to say. “See, we got our cutie marks while you were on yer trip to see Maud Pie.”

She turned slightly, gesturing to her cutie mark. The other two did the same.

“We got it after we helped Diamond Tiara figure out what her cutie mark really meant,” she continued.

“Twilight Sparkle informed me of your recent achievement,” Turing said. “I am sorry that I was not present for your Cutecañera.”

“That’s okay,” Apple Bloom said, shrugging her shoulders. “After all, I missed yer Bot Mitzvah… not by choice, though.”

Sweetie Belle cleared her throat. “I think what she means is that we were hoping that, um,” she blushed slightly as she looked away, “well, we thought that maybe since we got our cutie marks helping ponies with cutie mark problems, then maybe we could, um… help you get yours?”

Turing’s eyes constricted.

Scootaloo chuckled. “Heh. Yeah, it was a dumb idea, I guess,” she said, rolling her eyes. “Sorry about bothering you during magic practice.”

The other two nodded, voicing their agreement, as they turned and began to walk away.

“One moment, please,” Turing said, reaching after them. The three fillies turned to face her. “I stated that it was unlikely that robots get cutie marks. However, there is no empirical evidence to the contrary, either. Since I am a pony, it is possible that I can obtain one. If you are offering to assist me in obtaining one, then I am willing to accept your offer.”

The three fillies all looked to each other with beaming smiles.

“All right!” Apple Bloom exclaimed, raising a hoof. “Time to get Turing Test a cutie mark!”

“Yeah!” the other two said, bumping hooves with her in response.

“I will inform Twilight Sparkle of this,” Turing Test said as she began to walk towards the castle. “How will we begin?”

The three Crusaders blinked.

“Huh,” Apple Bloom said.

“Uh… I guess we didn’t think about it that far,” Scootaloo said, blushing as she flashed a sheepish grin.

Sweetie Belle scrunched her eyes shut. “Hmmmm,” she hummed, sitting down and crossing her forelegs. “Ummm… Oh! Ooh ooh ooh ooh ooh!”

Turing Test cocked her head to the side. “You have a suggestion?”

“I think I know just what to do! And just the colt who can help!”

***

The three Crusaders and their robot companion rounded a corner in Ponyville and into a wide alley with a canvas canopy over it. Several large, upright boxes with flashing lights on their screens were on either side of it. The boxes had buttons and small sticks on them and made electronic beeping noises.

“What is this place?” Turing Test asked, peering closely at one of the screens. Small, pixelated figures appeared on them, and they were jumping, running, and climbing ladders.

“Arcade Alley!” Sweetie Belle said, grinning up at her. “It’s a place where you can put bits into the machines and they play games for you!”

“Machines?” Turing asked, cocking her head to the side. “Interesting. I was not aware of such technology existing in Ponyville, or anywhere else. How does it work?”

Sweetie Belle shrugged. “I asked Twilight once, and she said that it was made from magically enhanced gems that project light onto the screen. I didn’t really get what she was saying, but I guess it’s pretty simple and just looks impressive.”

Scootaloo cleared her throat. “Uh, Sweetie Belle?” she asked, narrowing her eyes at her. “Please tell me you didn’t drag us over here to play more ‘Kraftwerk’.”

“What?” Sweetie gasped. “No! I wanted to see if Turing’s talent was playing video games! I mean, they’re machines, she’s a machine… I thought it made sense!”

Apple Bloom rubbed her chin. “Hmm… I guess that does kinda make sense when ya say it like that.”

“And who better to teach her to play than--”

“Dang it!” came a shrill adolescent voice.

Apple Bloom and Scootaloo both sighed. “Button Mash,” they said in unison.

Turing was already following the sound and found the beanie-copter-clad colt standing on a stool in front of a cabinet. He was reaching into a small bag of coins, grumbling to himself as the words “Game Over” appeared on the screen in bright blue letters.

“That lousy Spokey Dokey thinks he can beat me?” he grumbled. “I’ll show him who’s the toughest in this circus!” He held up a bit and prepared to insert it into a slot on the front of the cabinet.

“Hello, Button Mash,” Turing said, startling the colt badly enough that he dropped the bit and it rolled under the cabinet.

“Augh, no!” he yelped reaching futilely for the bit. “I only have six of those left!” He sank to his haunches when he saw it was futile. “Whyyyy?!” he wailed dramatically.

There was a cough, and Sweetie Belle strolled over, wearing a confident smile. “Just leave it to me!” she said, thumping her chest. With that, her horn began to glow and, scrunching her face with the effort, she managed to lock onto the coin and levitate it out from under the heavy machine and into Button’s hoof.

“Aw, cool!” Button exclaimed, his eyes lighting up. He smiled at Sweetie. “Thanks a lot, Sweetie Belle!” He glanced down at the bit and held it out to her. “Hey, you wanna be my player 2?”

She blushed slightly, feeling her cheeks burn as the other two Crusaders chuckled.

“Um, that’s nice, but actually we thought maybe you could help out Turing Test today.”

“Huh? Turing Test?” He blinked and looked to his right to finally see the robot standing right next to him. He gasped but then broke into a broad grin. “Ohhh, cool, you brought your robot pal with you again!”

“It is nice to see you as well, Button Mash,” Turing replied. “I have previously wished to spend more time with you, as you are the one to first alert me to the word ‘robot,’ a term I now use to identify myself.”

“Well, what can I say?” he said, wearing a smug look. “I am pretty in the know.”

“Said the guy who didn’t even notice the robot standing next to him for a full minute,” Scootaloo muttered.

“Look, we might as well get right to the point,” Apple Bloom said. “Sweetie Belle here was wonderin’ if ya wanna teach Turing Test how to play video games.”

Button blinked and gave a sideways glance at Turing Test. “I don’t know,” he said uncertainly. “I was hoping to beat Spokey Dokey on level 10 today, and that was gonna take up most of my time.”

“Oh come on!” Scootaloo grunted, fluttering her wings to momentarily hover over him. “Just help us out, Button! At least you’ll be doing something useful instead of just wasting your entire allowance on this dumb game again!”

Button pouted, crossing his forelegs. “It is not dumb. And I’m not ‘wasting’ it! I can spend my allowance however I want.”

“Y-yeah, leave him alone, Scootaloo!” Sweetie said, stepping between the two. Turning to Button, she said, “Look, think of it this way: you’ll be the first pony to play video games with a robot ever! That would be pretty cool, don’t you think?”

He nodded slowly. “Yeah,” he said quietly. Then his grin widened. “Yeah! Yeah, that sounds awesome!” He turned to face Turing Test. “Okay, Turing Test! You’re player two! Jump or dodge the obstacles and get to the top of the screen to hit Spokey Dokey in the face with the pie! Every two levels, they show a cutscene! I’ve never seen the last one on level 10, though.”

“Then hopefully we will be able to by working together,” Turing said.

“Maybe, but it’s pretty tough,” Button said. “We have to share power-ups, we both have to make it to the top, and if one of us dies, then we both have to restart the level.”

Turing’s ears went straight. “If one of us dies? Button Mash, I do not wish to play a game that may have such consequences.”

“No no no!” he yelled, smacking his face with his hoof as the Crusaders all chuckled. “I mean if your character dies! You get three lives, plus an extra one if you get 50,000 points. Here, watch me!”

He put the bit in the machine and began to play the first level. Turing Test watched intently as Button skillfully dodged bouncing hoops and ferocious lions and crossed obstacles with a trapeze until finally reaching the top of the level and touching a pixelated cream pie, causing it to launch into a sinister-looking clown’s face. (This was the titulary Spokey Dokey, as Button explained.)

“Okay, think you’ve got it?” Button asked.

“Affirmative,” she replied. “May I borrow a bit?”

His eyes went wide. “Y-you mean you didn’t bring your own?”

“I do not carry money, ordinarily. However, if you will provide me with one bit, then I am certain that I will not need a second.”

“Ooooh!” the Crusaders all said.

Even Button had to admire her confidence. “Okay then,” he said, passing her a coin. “Go ahead and put the coin in and press the Player 2 button and you’ll join the game!”

Turing Test did so. As the second level began, Turing’s character appeared at the bottom of the screen, opposite Button’s character. To Button’s surprise, though, Turing Test easily moved through the level, defeating enemies, dodging obstacles, and even leaving all the power-ups for Button. The two of them cleared the path to the top and easily completed the level.

“Whoa!” Button exclaimed as the simplistic cutscene played. “How’d you do that?”

“By observing you playing the first level, I was able to analyze the movements and patterns of obstacles as well as formulate an ideal strategy to avoid or defeat them. This level did introduce some new elements and a slight increase in speed, however, which seems to add to the challenge. I am beginning to understand why you enjoy this activity, Button Mash.”

Button grinned broadly, then turned back to the game with a fierce grin as the third level started. “In that case, let’s take down this clown!”

Sweetie Belle had been watching eagerly from the beginning, but as the levels increased in speed and intensity, Apple Bloom and Scootaloo became increasingly absorbed in the action of the game.

“Look out! That lion’s gonna get ya!” Apple Bloom yelled.

“Get the seltzer bottle!” Scootaloo cried, pointing at it on the screen.

“I know, I know!” Button shouted back, gritting his teeth as he rapidly hit the buttons and wiggled the joystick, trying to focus on the game.

Through it all, Turing Test stayed mostly silent, save for warnings or advising Button of her own plans to defeat the level. Though Button lost two of his lives and even Turing lost one, they both made it to the final level and, after several tense near-misses, finally managed to reach the top one last time.

“We did it!” Button hollered, leaping into the air, even embracing Turing Test as the Crusaders all cheered for them. “We did it, we did it, we did it! I finally saw the end of Spokey Dokey!”

“It seems to be asking for us to enter in our names, Button Mash,” Turing added, gesturing to the screen.

Indeed it was, adding to Button’s joy that they’d gotten the two highest scores on record.

“Thanks for playing with me!” he said warmly. Then he turned to Sweetie and the other Crusaders. “And thanks for bringing her! We should do this more often!”

“Y-yeah!” Sweetie said, smiling broadly. “That’d be great!”

“Absolutely!” Scootaloo said.

“I never cared much for this kinda thing,” Apple Bloom added, “but yer right: it’s actually pretty excitin’ once you get into it!”

“Button?” a high, feminine voice called. “Button, where are you, sweetie?”

Button sighed. “That’s my mom. I better go. But thanks for playing with me!” He grabbed his remaining bits and ran back down the alley, waving to them as he went.

“Well, that worked out pretty well,” Sweetie said.

“It was an enjoyable activity,” Turing Test said, “but we were not successful in our primary goal.” She turned to the side, showing her shiny metal flank, unbroken by any image whatsoever.

“No cutie mark, huh?” Apple Bloom said. “Well, I guess yer good at games, but maybe it ain’t yer special talent.”

“Well, how about something else?” Scootaloo asked. Her eyes went wide. “Oh, like racing!”

“But Scootaloo, as you will recall, I raced Rainbow Dash on two separate occasions. Though I showed great proficiency at those races, I did not receive a cutie mark by competing.”

“Wellll, maybe you could try scooter racing, like me?” she asked hopefully.

Turing shook her head. “I have examined your scooter and have determined that my weight would likely break such a device in half.”

Scootaloo closed her eyes and scratched her head in deep thought. “You might be right… but you’re so strong, maybe your special talent is something physical.” She opened her eyes, looking up at Turing. “Isn’t there something you think you might be good at physically?”

Turing tapped her chin. “I recently displayed prowess at breaking rocks and giving massages,” she offered.

“Well, heck, let’s try those next!”

Turing Test looked down at the hopeful Crusaders and gave them a nod. “Very well. Let us proceed.”

***

Turing Test stood before the pony lying on the masseuse’s table. She looked to her left to see Bulk Biceps next to her, likewise with a pony on a table before him. They both faced forward to see Aloe and Lotus, the local spa owners, standing before them.

“Now just watch Bulk Biceps here,” Aloe, the pink mare with blue hair, said to Turing Test. She glanced over and smiled weakly at Bulk Biceps, who grinned in response.

“And you,” Lotus, the blue mare with pink hair, said to Bulk Biceps, narrowing her eyes, “I hope you will not be getting carried away again, darling.”

“No problem!” Bulk exclaimed. As the two spa ponies left, he turned to face Turing Test. “You ready to do this, Turing Test?”

“Affirmative.”

The stallion on Bulk’s masseuse table sat up, eyeing him nervously. “Y’know, maybe this wasn’t such a good idea…”

Bulk rolled his eyes. “Just relax, dude. I’m a professional,” he said, placing a hoof to his chest.

“Well… I guess that I could--”

“YOU’RE GONNA FEEL SO RELAXED, IT’LL BE LIKE YOUR STRESS GOT CRUSHED TO DUST AND BLOWN AWAY! YEEAAHH!!”

The stallion whimpered, and Bulk obliviously shoved him down and began patting and kneading his back.

Analyzing and extrapolating data… his technique seems excessively forceful. Recommended action: utilize techniques compared with what seemed effective with Maud Pie.

She looked down at the pony lying on the table. She was a pegasus mare with a grayish blue coat and pale bluish green mane. “Uh, are you sure you’re up to this?” she asked, turning to look at Turing.

“I am not certain I will be adequate, but I will not injure you. I have a high degree of control over my motor skills.”

“Well… Scootaloo and Rainbow Dash both vouch for you,” she said, lying back down. “By the way, my name’s Flitter. Nice to meet you, Miss Robot.”

“You may call me Turing Test,” she replied. “And it is nice to meet you as well. Initiating massage…”

Flitter tensed up a moment, but as Turing began, she let out a long sigh, and her body relaxed. Though Turing was cautious around the wings, a feature neither Maud nor Bulk’s client had, the massage went smoothly.

When it was over, Flitter stood up and moaned contentedly. “Wow… you’re actually pretty good at this!”

Turing’s ears lifted, and she looked to see that Bulk Biceps was also smiling at her, giving her a wink as his client staggered to his hooves. “You’re a natural, Turing Test!” he shouted.

“I am a… natural? Can you say that about a pony who is artificial?”

“Uh, I’m not sure,” he said, scratching his head.

“Well, all I know is that I feel much better!” Flitter said. “I’m gonna tell my sister Cloud Chaser about you!”

To Aloe and Lotus’s mutual delight, Flitter’s talking up of Turing Test’s abilities caused several more ponies to request a massage. A dozen more ponies came and left raving about one of the best massages they’d ever had at the spa. Turing even gave some pointers to Bulk Biceps about how he might soften his own technique, which he graciously accepted.

“Miss Toorink Test!” Lotus said, walking into the little massage room, “your little friends are back! They want to know if you have gotten your cutie mark.”

The Crusaders all smiled brightly as Turing stepped out from behind the masseuse’s table. However, their smiles faded when they saw that Turing’s flank remained blank.

“Well, don’t worry about that, Turing Test!” Apple Bloom said, holding up a hoof. “We found a bunch more ponies that said they’d let you try out some stuff to see if it’s yer special talent!”

“Acknowledged,” Turing said, following them out.

“Oh, a moment,” Lotus said, putting her hoof on Turing’s shoulder. “This is a little something to say thanks for the free publicity.” She held out a small sack of bits tied with a drawstring.

But Turing Test shook her head and held up a hoof. “That is not necessary. After all, you were doing a service for me by allowing me to test myself. You do not need to compensate me.”

“What? Oh no, darling, please there must be somethink we can do!”

Turing tapped her chin. “Perhaps you could offer a free service to my friends on their next visit?” she asked, gesturing to the three fillies, whose eyes lit up. (Well, save for Scootaloo, who merely pretended not to be excited.)

“Consider it done!” Lotus said.

She waved goodbye as Turing and the Crusaders moved on to their next task.

***

Turing and the Crusaders stood before the two mares. One was a yellow earth pony with a white mane and a pink hard hat. Next to her was a light brown unicorn with a white mane ,a wrench as a cutie mark, and a tool belt around her waist.

“So, lemme get this straight, Silver Spanner,” the yellow mare said to her unicorn companion, “this here robot’s gonna help us out?”

“That’s right, boss!” Silver said, nodding confidently. “I saw her race Rainbow Dash a while back! And I hear she’s super strong! And now the Crusaders here think she might be able to earn a cutie mark in demolition.”

The Crusaders all wore identical adorable grins. The yellow mare bit her lip and glanced over at Turing Test.

“I’m not so sure,” she said.

“Aw come on, Ambrosia,” Silver Spanner said, rolling her eyes. “This building has to go down anyway, and this way we won’t have to wait an extra day for the crane!”

Ambrosia sighed. “Alright, alright,” she said, putting up a hoof. “Then in that case, Miss Robot, here’s what I want ya ta do.”

Turing glanced at the building nearby. It was a three-story building with the windows broken and cleared out, the paint peeling, and the walls lined with cracks.

“This building’s gotta come down,” Ambrosia said, “but our crane’s already bein’ used for a different job. If ya think ya can take it down, that’d be great. Just try to keep it from gettin’ too spread out, or else we’ll have a lot harder time cleaning up the debris. Ya got that?”

“Affirmative,” Turing said, and began to approach the building.

“Come on, Turing!” Apple Bloom cheered.

“Yeah, show that building who’s boss!”

Turing gave a perfunctory glance at the building.

Potential structural weaknesses identified. Beginning stage one of demolition.

“Engaging U-Mode.” Her horn slid into place, and she fired several short blasts which took chunks out of the corners of the building. She then ran through the empty doorframe at the entrance to the old building.

“Switching to P-Mode,” she said, her voice echoing in the abandoned first floor of the abandoned edifice.

The other ponies gathered nearby heard the roar of jets and gasped as a series of loud crashed were heard, followed by the sound of splintering wood, before Turing rocketed through the roof of the building and into the sky. They then watched as she plunged back through the roof, causing clouds of dust and debris to burst from the open windows, as though it was exploding from the inside.

“Structural integrity sufficiently compromised. Switching to E-Mode.” She folded up her wings and let the pistons in her legs engage. She ran for the corners of the building and bucked each one mightily, cracking the support beams to where they started to bow out and the building began to shake and creak, giving a low, menacing rumble. Once she was satisfied that the building would take no more, she bucked one of the walls in the middle, causing it to crumble, then ran at the other wall, exiting the building by smashing right through it.

The building wobbled and teetered before finally collapsing straight down, the roof, floors, and walls crashing down on top of each other like a stack of pancakes. A cloud of dust radiated out, but the building itself was a neat square-shaped pile, perfect for picking up in one easy location.

“Heyyy, how about that!” Ambrosia laughed.

“I told you, boss!” Silver Spanner said.

Turing Test walked over to them, still covered in dust and dirt from the debris cloud.

“Way to go, Turing!” Apple Bloom cheered. “Ya smashed that buildin’ like it was nothin’!”

“It merely required the proper application of force to several key points to cause it to collapse in an orderly fashion,” Turing said, shaking the dust from her mane. She looked down at her flank, which was likewise covered with dust. She wiped the dust away to reveal the same blank flank she’d had when she’d started.

“Aw dang,” Apple Bloom sighed, lowering her head and ears. The other Crusaders followed suit. “I really thought we had somethin’ that time!”

“Sorry ya didn’t get a cutie mark from it,” Ambrosia said, placing her hoof on Turing’s shoulder. “But just the same, that was nice work! Could we call ya again next time we’ve got a job like this?”

Turing looked down at the hoof on her shoulder, then back to Ambrosia. “Affirmative. I would be happy to help you again in the future.”

“Ha! Ya know, yer alright, Miss Robot!” Ambrosia said, looking to Silver Spanner, who was nodding eagerly in agreement.

Turing looked to the three Crusaders. “What activity shall we try next?” she asked.

The three Crusaders exchanged a look, then all assumed mutual smiles.

“If you ain’t ready to give up,” Apple Bloom began.

“--Then neither are we!” Scootaloo exclaimed, finishing Apple Bloom’s sentence.

“Besides,” Sweetie Belle added, “we’re experts in trying to get a cutie mark! And we’re just getting started! Right?”

“Right!” Apple Bloom and Scootaloo exclaimed in response.

“Very well,” Turing said, giving a short nod. “What else shall we try?”

***

“Ugh!” Sweetie Belle groaned, tossing her head back dramatically. “I can’t believe you all got us kicked out of the movie theater!”

“Hey, it’s not our fault!” Scootaloo shot back.

Turing and the Crusaders were walking back through the town after their latest attempt at getting a cutie mark. Sweetie Belle was leading the pack as the other three trailed behind. At Scootaloo’s protest, she stopped in her tracks and turned to glare at her.

“W-well,” Apple Bloom said, looking away, “I mean, we were just tryin’ to get Turing a cutie mark fer bein’ a movie critic.”

“I did enjoy the one movie that I had seen before. I thought reviewing films would be interesting.” She tilted her head. “Was my technique flawed?”

Sweetie Belle puffed out her cheeks, practically shaking. “You three talked through the movie for half an hour before the usher finally told us to leave!” she shrieked. “We just got our cutie marks and you’re acting like a bunch of three-year-olds!”

Turing raised a hoof.

“What?” Sweetie asked.

“I am less than a year old, if that makes a difference.”

“That-- ugh, I don’t know!”

“Aw, c’mon, Sweetie Belle,” Apple Bloom said, “don’t be sore at us. After all, that movie was pretty bad. Makin’ fun of it with Turing was actually a lot of fun.”

“Many elements of the film did indeed seem to lack plausibility,” Turing said, giving a nod. “The need for attacking the criminals’ hideout without a warrant and without sufficient backup was not made clear. Furthermore, I cannot understand why the central character’s partner was a talking cat named Sergeant Murpaw.”

“Because cats can’t talk?” Scootaloo asked.

“No. The ability to talk would at least qualify for some of an officer’s duties, but I am uncertain that a feline would be able to pass the physical assessment for law enforcement. Furthermore, his repeated insistence that he was ‘too old for this kibble’ was nonsensical, as there was no kibble present at any time that he mentioned such a thing.”

“Oh yeah!” Apple Bloom laughed. “An’ what was with the good guy? They were really tryin’ too hard to make ‘im into some sorta macho action hero type!”

Scootaloo started laughing as well. “Yeah, remember all the names we started calling him when we couldn’t remember his character’s real name?”

“Oh, like Steel Fetlock!”

“Grunt Strongjaw!” Scootaloo shot back, assuming the most faux-masculine voice the little filly could muster.

“You guys,” Sweetie Belle sighed.

“Smash Logtoss!” Apple Bloom said, continuing obliviously.

“Chunk McRapidgallop!”

“Hard Ironbarrel!”

“Stomp Blasthooves!”

“Toss Bucklots!”

“Thick Sidesaddle!”

“Rip Flankchest!”

“Hay Arnold!”

“Ram Blastkick!”

“Vin Diesel!”

The three fillies all gawked at Turing Test. Scootaloo and Apple Bloom started chuckling as Sweetie Belle stared on in open-mouthed disbelief.

“Really, Turing Test?!” Sweetie groaned. “You too?!”

“My apologies,” she said, lowering her ears. “It looked like fun.”

“It kinda was!” Apple Bloom said, earning a nod of agreement from Scootaloo. “Heck, it sure was more fun than actually payin’ attention to that dumb movie. Maybe we should do that more often: just watch some bad movies an’ make jokes while other ponies watch us!”

Sweetie Belle turned her incredulous look to Apple Bloom. “Seriously?!” she squeaked. “Who would want to watch some ponies and a robot just watching a movie and making jokes about it?”

Sweetie massaged her temples. The day had been jam-packed with activities, but still no cutie mark. They’d practiced gardening with Golden Harvest and June Bug, flower arrangement with Lily and Roseluck and Daisy, grape stomping with Amethyst Star and her little sister Dinky Hooves, along with subsequently making punch with, naturally, Berry Punch, and even cloud busting with Thunderlane and Blossomforth.

“It’s so weird,” Sweetie remarked, tapping her chin.

“What is?” Scootaloo asked.

“It’s just that, well… you know how the three of us kept trying different things to get our cutie marks?”

Scootaloo and Apple Bloom nodded.

“I hate to say it, but when we tried it, we really weren’t very good at any of them.”

“Oh!” Apple Bloom exclaimed, her eyes going wide as she picked up on Sweetie’s train of thought. “But with Turing Test, she’s actually been good at just about everything!”

Turing’s eyes constricted slightly. “I am able to record and precisely imitate actions that I see in most cases. This is simply one of my normal abilities as a robot.”

Scootaloo raised an eyebrow. “Well, then that’s not really a ‘special’ talent, is it?”

Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle shook their heads.

“Then you are saying that since a robot is innately able to master most skills, then those skills are not special, and therefore undeserving of a cutie mark?” She lowered her head. “Then perhaps it is impossible for me to earn a cutie mark, even if such a thing is physically possible.”

The other crusaders all let their ears droop as they looked down in defeat.

“Oh, wait wait wait!” Sweetie Belle cried, jerking her head back up, her eyes sparkling with sudden inspiration. “Even if she’s good at all those things, maybe she can still get a cutie mark in something if it’s special to her!”

“Ohhhh!” Apple Bloom and Scootaloo exclaimed in unison.

“We’ve suggested all these ideas because we thought Turing would be good at them,” Sweetie continued, closing her eyes and raising her head as if lecturing, “but maybe she could learn a skill that she wanted to learn! Something that was fun and interesting for her personally!”

“Great idea, Sweetie Belle!” Scootaloo cried.

“Yeah, that just might work!” Apple Bloom added. She turned to face Turing Test, and the others did the same. “So, how ‘bout it, Turing Test? Is there some kinda thing you always wanted to learn?”

Turing shifted her ears asymmetrically. “Scanning memory…”

She recalled the time she had gone out into Ponyville attempting to stimulate feelings of affection by hugging other ponies. That day had not gone well, but she recalled how, right before Fine Print had lured her away, she’d been watching some foals listening to a record. And she’d heard some of her friends humming small tunes as they worked, including Spike, Fluttershy, and Rarity. Maud didn’t sing, but she had shown Turing how different rocks sometimes resonated with different sounds when struck. And Pinkie did seem fond of her own silly songs, as well. And yet, Turing had never really spent time listening to or learning about music, despite its prevalence in her friends’ lives.

“Potential skill identified,” she said after a few moments of scanning. “I would like to learn about music.”

Apple Bloom and Scootaloo immediately covered their ears with their hooves as a high-pitched squeal of delight erupted from Sweetie Belle!

“Oh my gosh, that’s great, Turing!” she exclaimed, bouncing up and down with excitement. “And we’re in luck! It’s just a block away!” she added, and took off running.

Turing Test only hesitated a moment before giving chase. Scootaloo and Apple Bloom followed behind.

“Hey, hold on a second, Sweetie Belle!” Scootaloo shouted. “What’s just a block away? Just where the heck are we going?!”

Sweetie Belle looked over her shoulder with a gleaming smile. “The Ponyville Musician’s Guild! Turing can learn about music from the finest musicians in town!”

Turing felt a sudden surge of eagerness and even excitement. Before that day, she’d never considered the possibility of having a cutie mark. But now, she realized, as the faint sounds of music became audible, she was eager to pursue a future where her shiny metal flank would shine with a brand new emblem of her own unique talent.

To be continued...

Author's Notes:

With all the music references that get thrown out around here, it's kind of surprising it took this long to get to a music-themed chapter. Hope you enjoy that next time!

Meantime, I hope you all are enjoying a chance to see the CMC shine after not appearing as a group since waaaay earlier in the story. And on that note: Cutie Mark Crusader reference-joke abusers, yaaay!

-The title is binary, as many of you can guess. It translates to "qt"... as in "cutie." As in... well, I guess that's obvious. What might not be know, though, is that this binary code was originally going to be Turing Test's cutie mark! However, I decided against it after seeing an early sketch of Turing with it, and decided it looked too jarring. Plus, if her creators were going to give her a "cutie mark," they'd more likely just put "003" on her and be done with it.

-Sweetie Belle is referenced to enjoy a game called "Kraftwerk." This is both a play on words for "Minecraft," which Sweetie's voice actress, Claire Corlett is fond of playing, and which is the subject behind Jan Animations' awesome music video "Don't Mine at Night," which I'm guessing a lot of you have seen, and also a direct reference to the German band "Kraftwerk," which pioneered a lot of experimental electronic music, including, fittingly, a song called "Robots."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-wop47G2qeY

-The game Button is playing, "Spokey Dokey," is a game which is similar to "Donkey Kong," but the name itself is the name of the game that a retro-gamer terrorist enjoys in the Cowboy Bebop movie. Also, the fact that both players have to start over when one dies is a reference to the classic Nintendo-hard game "Battletoads."

-The movie the CMC and Turing attend is just a generic cop film, but the cat detective named "Murpaw" is a reference to the character Murtaugh, from the Lethal Weapon movies, played by Danny Glover. This is further driven by his catchphrase, "I'm gettin' too old for this kibble!" which references Murtaugh's eternal lament: "I'm gettin' too old for this sht!"

-The idea of a robot making fun of a movie? Please, who could not catch the Mystery Science Theater 3000 reference?! (For the record, it is my favorite show of all time.) The absurdly manly names Scootaloo and Apple Bloom spout off are a specific reference to a running gag in the episode "Space Mutiny."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RFHlJ2voJHY

-The stupid names are my own, but I'm guessing at least two of those dumb names stand out: "Hay Arnold" referencing the Nickelodeon cartoon "Hey Arnold," and "Vin Diesel." Why Mr. Diesel? Because he was the voice of the title character in the great animated film The Iron Giant, which partially influenced Turing's design.

-Aaaand last of all, this is less a reference, but you might have noticed a pretty high number of background ponies, many of whom may not come to mind immediately by name. Well, have no fear!

Aloe

Lotus

Junebug

Ambrosia

Silver Spanner

Flitter

Golden Harvest

Amethyst Star

Dinky

Berry Punch (aka Berryshine)

Rose, Daisy, and Lily

Thunderlane

Blossomforth

Whew! Well, that's it for now, folks! See you next time!

Music Sounds Better With You

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Turing Test and the Crusaders made their way through Ponyville before coming to a stop in front of a large building.

Like most buildings in Ponyville, it was timber-framed with white paint, though, unlike the little thatch-roofed cottages that made up most of the town, this had a more modern, tiled roof. A large sign with a musical note hung by the door.

“Here it is, Turing!” Sweetie Belle exclaimed, sweeping a foreleg at it. “The Musicians’ Guild!”

Turing’s keen ears detected more strange sounds coming from the building, though, as always, her organic companions apparently could not hear them. There were horns, the rattling of drums, and several distinct sounds she wasn’t able to identify. Though she had data on different musical instruments, she wasn’t at all sure what any of them really sounded like.

“Ya know,” Apple Bloom said, coming up alongside Sweetie, “I’ve seen this building here before, but I’ve never actually gone inside! What’s inside it?”

Scootaloo rolled her eyes. “Musicians, of course!” she said.

Sweetie shook her head. “No no no,” she said. Then she paused, frowning. “Well, yes,” she admitted, “but there’s much more than that! You can get music lessons, buy music sheets, rent an instrument, or just borrow a practice room! I come here sometimes to practice my singing. Trust me, if there’s anywhere in Ponyville to learn about music, Turing, it’s here!”

Turing Test raised her head at that. “Then please lead the way. I am eager to learn more and perhaps earn my cutie mark.”

“That’s the spirit, Turing!” Apple Bloom exclaimed, raising a hoof. The other Crusaders bumped it in triumph.

“Lead the way, Sweetie Belle!” Scootaloo said. “We’ll back you up if you need us!”

“Right!” Sweetie led the way as they walked up to the front doors and pushed them open.

A gray earth pony stallion with a white mane was at the front desk.

“Hello, and welcome to the Musicians’ Guild!” he said cheerfully. “How--” He froze when he saw the strange metal pony walking towards him.

“Good afternoon, Royal Riff!” Sweetie Belle said, trotting up to the desk and giving him a sweet smile. “How are you today?”

“I… um…” He shook his head and managed a nervous smile, though his eyes kept darting over to Turing Test. “I’m fine, Sweetie Belle. I see you, ah, brought guests.”

Sweetie nodded emphatically. “Apple Bloom and Scootaloo and I are all helping Turing Test here find her cutie mark, and we thought maybe she’d be good with music!”

He pushed his lips in and out. “Yyyes, well… maybe!”

Turing Test strolled over to the desk. “I can tell by your body language that I make you nervous.”

“W-well, it’s nothing personal,” he said, “it’s just that, um… I’ve never seen you up close. I mean, I’ve seen you in Ponyville, I just…” He trailed off, leaving an awkward silence.

“Understood.” She bowed politely. “My name is Turing Test. I am here to learn music and make friends. It is nice to meet you.”

Royal Riff blinked a few times, but a smile slowly came to his face. “Ah. It’s nice to meet you too.” He cleared his throat. “Sorry, I guess I… I just didn’t know what to expect. Is there something in particular you need?”

“Well, I think she could really use a teacher,” Sweetie Belle said. “I’d teach her myself, but… maybe somepony more experienced than me would be best!”

“I see,” Royal Riff said, opening a book on the desk. “It looks like there aren’t many instructors here that are available. Most aren’t in today, and the rest are all booked up.”

The three Crusaders all frowned, their ears lowering in unison as they looked up at him with the cutest puppy dog eyes they could muster. Royal Riff rubbed his neck, breaking into a sweat.

“Well… she’s not an instructor, but, uh… she has been known to help some of the other ponies around here. I guess it wouldn’t hurt to ask her. Provided she doesn’t blow a fuse at you for ‘breaking her concentration,’ I mean.”

Apple Bloom and Scootaloo both flashed wide grins. Sweetie Belle, however, looked away uncertainly.

“Oh. You mean her. She might not want to help, though.”

Royal Riff shrugged. “Well, she’s the only one around. Take it or leave it, Sweetie Belle.”

She sighed. “Fine. Which room is she in?”

“Room P8.”

Sweetie nodded and again led the group as they went up the nearby stairs and down a hall. They passed several closed doors, but the sound of instruments very gently bled in from the soundproofed doors.

“Is something wrong?” Scootaloo asked.

“Yeah, you didn’t seem too keen on whoever this musician is,” Apple Bloom added.

“It’s not that she’s a bad choice,” Sweetie Belle said, heaving a sigh, “it’s just that she’s… a little particular.”

They came to the door marked P8. The rich sound of a cello being played was heard faintly through the door.

Sweetie sighed and gently rapped on the door, the sound barely audible.

“Well, guess she’s busy!” Sweetie Belle said, turning to go.

She was stopped by Apple Bloom while Scootaloo walked over to the door and knocked a little harder on it.

The cello music stopped, and the sound of hooves stomping was heard, along with grumbling. The door opened, and a gray mare with a dark mane and a pink bow tie stuck her head out.

“Can’t you see this room is occupied?!” she shouted, her posh Trottingham accent instantly recognizable. “Go away and let me practice in peace!”

She slammed the door in Scootaloo’s face.

“I… think I see what you mean,” she said, chuckling nervously.

A second later, however, the door opened again. “Wait a moment,” the mare said, glancing over. “Sweetie Belle? I say, is that you? And you’ve brought-- oh!” she cried, spotting Turing Test at last.

“Um… hello Octavia,” Sweetie Belle said, swallowing, her cheeks reddening. “I’m sorry if we bothered you.”

“No, no, I… I apologize,” she said, looking away herself. “I’m just a bit frustrated. This blasted prelude is rather complicated, and so I… well, never mind. Who is your friend?”

“Hello,” Turing Test began, stepping forward. “My name is Turing Test. I am a robot, a mechanical pony, who has been staying with Twilight Sparkle for the purpose of learning about friendship.”

“Ah,” Octavia said, putting out her hoof, allowing herself a smile. “I am Octavia Melody. I’m a cellist. Enchanted to meet you.”

“You have a Trottingham accent, correct?”

“Yes. What of it?” she asked, raising an eyebrow.

“I have visited Trottingham. It was a very nice visit. I spent a significant amount of time at Cambridle University.”

“Really, now!” Octavia said, brightening up significantly. “Well, now that you mention it, my friend Lyra, whom I also occasionally play with, was mentioning you. It is nice to meet you in person Miss, er, Turing Test, was it?”

Turing nodded.

“I see. Well,” she said, “is there something more you want? I get the feeling this was more than a social call.”

Sweetie nodded. “Yes. Um, Miss Octavia, do you think… that is… could you teach Turing Test music?”

Octavia raised an eyebrow. “Teach her… music?”

Sweetie nodded.

Octavia turned to face Turing Test. “And what do you know about music?”

“Music: noun - vocal or instrumental sounds (or both) combined in such a way as to produce beauty of form, harmony, and expression of emotion; the written or printed signs representing vocal or instrumental sound.”

Octavia blinked. “So… you know what the word means… and that’s it?”

Turing nodded. “I have never played music, or sung, or even heard the entirety of a song before.”

Octavia rubbed her forehead. “I… am not certain I can help you. There’s quite a bit of ground to cover…”

“I do not wish to cover ground with anything; I wish to learn about music.”

The Crusaders all groaned in unison, but Octavia actually chuckled. “Well, what I meant was… ah, never mind. I suppose I have the time, and nopony should be without music in their life…” She smiled and gave a decisive nod. “Very well, Miss Turing Test. I shall teach you about music!”

The three fillies cheered. Sweetie Belle abruptly hugged Octavia, causing her to give a start and a momentary flinch, but she relaxed and smiled at Sweetie’s exuberance.

“Thank you thank you thank you, Miss Octavia!” Sweetie exclaimed.

“Now now, no need to lose one’s head over it,” she said gently. She then turned to face Turing Test. “Well, shall we begin?”

Turing nodded. “Affirmative. Thank you for your assistance.”

“Don’t thank me yet… I suppose we might wish to first see if we can teach you the basics before we get too deeply into this.”

***

The room Octavia had led them to was a larger practice room, and this one had a baby grand piano in the corner. Octavia stood next to a blue earth pony stallion with a pair of eighth notes as a cutie mark.

“Noteworthy here has agreed to assist us today,” Octavia said, turning to smile at the stallion.

“No problem!” he said, pulling up the bench to sit before the piano. “Come on over here, Miss Robot, and we’ll try to show you a bit about how to read music.”

Turing obliged and came next to him, Octavia in tow as the Crusaders stood by. Turing stopped short of the bench and glanced down at it.

“Well come on,” Noteworthy said, patting the spot on it next to him, “have a seat!”

“That may not be wise. I have a bad history with sitting on things.”

“She does,” Sweetie Belle muttered dryly.

“But on the upside, that was the best game of musical chairs ever!” Scootaloo added.

“Uhhh… yeah,” Noteworthy said, giving Turing a weak smile. “S-standing’s okay too. Uh, anyway…”

He held up several sheets of music and placed them on the stand on the head of the piano. “These are the notes you use to read music.”

Octavia reached over and pointed at one of the notes. “That is a ‘G’ note, Turing Test,” she said. “Musical notes are called by letters, going from A to G and then repeating. Each set of eight notes is called an octave. If you go up an octave, you go up a pitch! Noteworthy, would you show her?”

Noteworthy tapped the ‘G’ key and then went up an octave, pressing a higher ‘G.’ Turing’s ears twitched.

“I see. That is very interesting. However, there are more than eight buttons--”

“Keys,” Noteworthy corrected, chuckling lightly.

“--keys between those notes.”

“Well, the black keys and white keys can make the regular note or make a ‘sharp’ or ‘flat’ note, which is a half step up in pitch. Ah, that is… it’s halfway between one note and the next. Sharps are a half step higher than the note indicated, and flats are a half step lower.” Octavia frowned. “I’m sorry, but I’m not certain if this is effective. Is this making any sense at all?”

But Turing nodded, to Octavia’s surprise. “It is very sensible. And those symbols at the beginning of this music sheet… do they signify that all notes on those lines should be played sharp or flat?”

“Yes! Oh, I say, you learn very quickly!” Octavia laughed. “This is the key of D Major. The Fs and Cs are to be played sharp. Actually, this is a lovely tune entitled ‘Canon and Gigue in D,’ by Pommelbel. Noteworthy, would you mind playing her a bit?”

Noteworthy nodded and got his hooves into position. He gently began to play the light, tinkling notes of the song as it grew in complexity. Octavia stifled a laugh when she saw that Sweetie Belle had her eyes closed and was swaying slightly as she hummed along with the melody.

After a few moments, Noteworthy finished the tune and turned to face Turing Test, whose eyes had slightly constricted.

“Did you enjoy it?” he asked.

“I… yes, I did!” she said, her voice surprisingly energetic. “I understand now. Music is organized into mathematical divisions and a consistent speed and rhythm. Furthermore, I was able to decipher and match the notes on the page to the keys you were playing. I am now able to read music.”

“You what?!” Octavia asked, her mouth dropping open. “Good heavens, already?!”

Apple Bloom chuckled. “Yeah, Turing here is a pretty fast learner. I bet she could play just about anything now!”

Noteworthy raised an eyebrow. “Is that right? Well, then, give it a try!” He moved from the bench, giving Turing Test room to stand before the piano.

Turing raised her hoof, glancing down at it and then to the piano. “One thing I am uncertain of is… how are you able to play this instrument with hooves?”

They all went wide-eyed at that.

“Umm…” Noteworthy looked down at his hoof as well, his gaze turning into an empty stare. “How… how…? I…”

Sweetie Belle coughed, breaking everyone out of their own momentary stupor. “Turing, you could always use your magic, you know.”

Turing nodded. “I believe that would be best.”

“Yeah, great idea!” Noteworthy said (a little more forcefully than he probably should have) as he assumed a tight grin. “Hey, that’s way better than that thing we were just talking about, heh heh… whatever it was, I mean.” He smacked his lips. “Why do I taste copper?”

“Engaging U-Mode,” Turing said, and her horn appeared. A goldenrod glow engulfed the piano keys and, just like before, the little sounds of notes began to fill the room. It was perfectly played, sounding just like it had before.

“That was awesome!” Scootaloo exclaimed, leaping into the air and giving a flutter of her wings.

“Yeah, yer gonna be famous if ya keep playin’ like that!” Apple Bloom added.

But then they turned to see that Octavia was frowning, and her eyes were narrowed. She exchanged a look with Noteworthy, who was also frowning.

Turing tilted her head. “You do not seem pleased. I do not believe I made a mistake. Is something the matter?”

“It’s… well, would you mind playing it again?”

Turing shifted her ears at the request but obliged and played the tune a second time.

“It still sounds good to me,” Scootaloo said.

“Same here!” Apple Bloom said.

But then they saw that Sweetie Belle was also frowning. “I get it,” she whispered. “She’s playing it the same way as Noteworthy! The exact same way!”

Turing nodded. “Correct. Noteworthy provided an excellent lesson.”

“Yes, well,” Octavia began, putting her hoof on Turing’s shoulder, “perhaps we should try a different piece. If you can read music, would you mind giving this a try?”

She gave Turing another piece, entitled simply “Run Down.” This was infinitely more complex and much faster. But without a moment of hesitation, Turing set it on the stand and played it without a single mistake.

Now the other Crusaders were making faces too.

“I do not understand,” Turing said, her ears squeaking as they went flat. “I played perfectly. Why are you reacting in this way?”

“I dunno,” Apple Bloom said, not meeting her eyes. “There’s just somethin’ kinda… weird about it. An’ it aint’ just the song.”

“It’s like you’re playing it too... loud?” Scootaloo said uncertainly as she rubbed her chin. “Or is it too quiet?”

“It just sounds wrong,” Sweetie Belle said, closing her eyes, scrunching them as she tried to put her hoof on it. “It’s… it just sounds unnatural.”

“Exactly,” Octavia sighed. “It’s, well, too perfect!”

Turing looked from one to another and saw that each of them was nodding in agreement. “Too perfect? How can that be? Perfect, by definition, describes something as ‘having all the required or desirable elements, qualities, or characteristics; as good as it is possible to be.’”

“Yes, and your playing is very good, but it has a certain artificial quality,” Octavia said. “The timing between each note is the same, and there’s no lingering quality to the music. It’s simply being played without anything unique or surprising to it. It’s… it’s not organic.”

Turing put her hoof to her chest. “Of course. I am not organic either.”

“Ah ha, yes,” Octavia said, nodding. Then she offered Turing a smile. “Well, perhaps with some practice, you could develop a bit more of your own style. After all, it is your first time playing. I apologize; I didn’t mean to discourage you.”

Turing was quiet for a moment. “Understood. Perhaps I will practice my playing.”

“Um, actually,” Noteworthy said, “I really need to get back to practicing myself. If you want to practice, you’ll have to reserve the room for later or find another piano.”

“Understood.” She twitched her ears. “Or perhaps I could simply imitate the sounds myself.”

Octavia and Noteworthy exchanged glances before looking back at Turing.

“What do you mean?” Octavia asked.

“I have the ability to mimic sounds. I will demonstrate.” She raised her head slightly and, sure enough, the sound of piano music came from her mouth.

“Cool trick, Turing!” Scootaloo said.

“Oh, yes, but… it isn’t a perfect facsimile,” Octavia said, making a face. “Forgive me, but there’s a rather tinny quality to it, and it actually sounds slightly distorted. I think perhaps the real thing is better.”

“Maybe she could play a different instrument,” Apple Bloom suggested. “Like a trumpet or a trombone or somethin’!”

“Those instruments,” Turing said, looking down at her, “are played by blowing into them and vibrating one’s lips, correct?”

Apple Bloom nodded, then froze. “Oh, right. I forgot you ain’t got no lips.”

“Or lungs,” Turing added.

Then Sweetie Belle gasped. “Oh, oh, I know!” she exclaimed, smiling up at Turing. “You could try singing the tune instead! Like this!” She raised her head and sonorously sang the main melody of “Pommelbel’s Canon.”

“Understood. I will also attempt to sing the tune.” Turing raised her head, but instead of making the piano sounds, she sang the notes in her own synthetic voice.

At first, Octavia flinched at it, but then, presently, Turing’s singing took on a strangely hypnotic sound. The notes were rigid and staggered, and the tinny quality was still audible, but something about Turing’s unearthly voice changed something about the song.

“Was that more to your liking?” Turing asked when she was finished. She looked to each of them. “Your expressions indicate that you found that to be more pleasing.”

“I dunno,” Apple Bloom said, tapping her chin. “It was nice an’ all, but I can’t imagine ya singin’ along with a ballad or a folk song or somethin’ like that.”

“It’s too bad,” Sweetie said. “You’re actually a pretty good singer! Maybe if there was some music that your voice went with--”

Octavia gasped suddenly, drawing startled looks from the others.

“I have it!” she exclaimed, breaking into a smile. “Perhaps the fact that you don’t sound organic is a disadvantage because we’ve been approaching the problem from a classical standpoint. But if the music was as synthetic as your voice…”

She galloped to the door and threw it open, gesturing for them all to follow her into the hallway. “I have an idea! Follow me! I may know just the pony who can help!”

***

In another wing of the building, the group made its way up a hall. On either side, the practice rooms were surprisingly empty, a fact that did not go unnoticed by Sweetie Belle, who asked about it.

“Well, though the rooms are somewhat soundproofed, they do little once--”

A sudden, deep rumbling shook the walls and ran up through the floor to their hooves. The rumbling repeated in a rhythmic thumping sound for a few moments before ceasing.

“What the hay was that?!” Apple Bloom asked.

Octavia sighed. “Seems she’s testing her equipment. Well, now at least you know why the others have chosen to practice elsewhere.”

Turing wasn’t certain what instrument could produce such a deep, reverberating sound, but her curiosity was piqued. She began walking ahead of the group as they approached the large double doors at the end of the hall.

As they did so, a new sound was heard. The thumping bass was still there, but there was also a steady drum beat, an electric guitar, and the rich, sonorous voice of a mare singing.

Apple Bloom and Scootaloo broke into beaming smiles.

“I know this song!” Scootaloo exclaimed, dashing towards the door.

“It’s Sapphire Shores’s song: ‘Serves Her Right!’”

As they ran past the others, the familiar lyrics came through loud and clear:
“She wanted glamor!
She wanted fame!
Now she’s got nothin’
Except her name!
No friends and family
were on her mind.
Now she’s the one
who’s left behi~i~iind, yeah!”

The fillies burst through the door but froze in their tracks as Octavia, Sweetie Belle, and Turing Test caught up to them.

In the larger practice room was not Sapphire Shores but another pony, a white unicorn mare with a dark and light blue striped mane. She was wearing purple-tinted shades and standing on her hind legs at a turntable, spinning a record and flipping switches and pushing sliders back and forth on the panel. From the large speakers next to her, the song continued.

“It serves her right!
It serves her right!
Ain’t got nopony
to be a guiding light!”

Then the mare stopped the record, pulling it back with a sharp scratching sound and stepping on a pedal, which added an extra drum beat to the song. A synthetic note grew in pitch under the sound. The song continued playing, but now the chorus was only repeating a certain part as more synthetic sound flooded the room, the thumping sound strong enough that they could all feel it in their chests.

“It serves her right! -right! -right! -right! -right! -right! -right!
-a guiding light -light! -light! -light! -light! -light! -light!
It serves her ri- ri- ri- ri- ri- ri- riririririririririririririririRIRIRIRIRIGHT!!”

There was a pause for a split second followed by an explosion of sound and deep, powerful bass tones. Octavia and Sweetie Belle both covered their ears, and even Apple Bloom flinched slightly at the bone-crushing sound, but Scootaloo was grinning ear-to-ear.

And all the while, Turing Test stood, transfixed by the spectacle before her.

The mare at the turntable was grinning fiercely and nodding her head vigorously to the music when she finally glanced over and spotted Octavia glaring at her. She flashed a sheepish grin and flipped a switch, causing the sound to stop and the record on the turntable to slowly stop spinning.

“Ugh,” Octavia groaned, walking over to her. “I understand your need to practice your craft, but really, must you do it so loudly?!”

The unicorn mare pursed her lips and stroked her chin thoughtfully. Then she grinned and nodded enthusiastically.

Octavia rolled her eyes. “Well, never mind all that,” she said. She looked to the others and straightened her bow tie. “Ahem. My friends, this is--”

“I know who she is!” Scootaloo exclaimed, rushing over to her. “You’re DJ Pon-3! I’ve heard your music! Pinkie plays it at her parties sometimes! You’re awesome!”

The mare, DJ Pon-3, raised her chin, grinning smugly as she polished a hoof on her chest.

“Yes,” Octavia said, “but as we’re not in one of those sweltering clubs she frequents, you can simply call her by her proper name: Miss Vinyl Scratch.”

Vinyl frowned and raised her shades to glare at Octavia, who simply shot her a grin right back.

“Oh, tish-tosh, Vinyl, I’m not calling you by your stage name when we’re in private company,” Octavia replied.

Vinyl rolled her eyes and was about to replace her shades when she spotted Turing Test nearby, watching her. She froze, and her shades slipped down her muzzle as she gawked at her.

“Hello, DJ Pon-3 or Vinyl Scratch. I am Turing Test. It is nice to meet you.”

Vinyl pushed her shades back up her muzzle and walked over to Turing. She cocked her head to the side and rubbed her chin as she looked the mechanical mare over, circling around her. She even gently rapped her hoof on Turing’s head, noting the metallic ringing it made. This caused Turing Test to shift her ears, which gave their customary squeak. Vinyl took a step back at the sudden sound and movement.

At last, she simply looked back to Octavia and then gestured with one hoof at Turing, jerking her head at her with an inquisitive look on her face.

“She’s a… um, what was that word you used, Miss Turing?”

“Robot,” Turing replied.

“Yes, yes, that’s it. She’s a robot, Vinyl,” Octavia explained. “A mechanical pony.”

“Yeah!” Apple Bloom said, coming over to Vinyl eagerly. “She’s a machine! But don’t be scared, ‘cause she’s real nice!”

“And she wants to learn music!” Sweetie Belle added, likewise coming to stand before her.

“Can you help?” Scootaloo asked, fluttering her wings as she joined her friends.

Vinyl looked all around her frantically, backing up from the eager fillies only to run flankfirst into Turing Test. She whirled around to face Turing and then looked around to see she was practically surrounded. She looked again to Octavia.

“Yes, well, that is the gist of things,” Octavia said, giving a nod and a smile. “I’m afraid we’ve run into a problem with teaching Turing Test music. She can read and apparently understand music with ease, but she has difficulty producing music. At least, in the traditional sense. You, however…”

She trailed off, and Vinyl seemed to get the hint as she pointed a hoof at herself.

“Yes, precisely,” Octavia replied. “We were wondering if you might help her find her musical niche, as it were.”

Vinyl crinkled her nose at that, but then she saw that Turing Test had walked past her and right up to her turntable. She tensed up and followed her, about to shoo her away from her equipment, but then she watched as Turing did something curious.

Turing very gently laid her metallic hoof on the machine, patting it as if it were an adorable puppy. “This is a machine. It makes music. The sounds are very different from the other music I have experienced today, but it still follows similar form and principles. It is still music. How interesting.”

Vinyl paused. Her hoof was still in the air as she’d been about to wave Turing Test off, but now she set it down and smiled. She went behind the turntable and turned it back on. She pressed the pedals at the bottom of the device and flipped a switch. The solid thump of a drum beat began to play. The Crusaders all began to nod their heads in time with the rhythm, and Turing, noticing this, began to mimic them.

Octavia chuckled at the scene. Oh, it really is like watching a foal discovering music for the first time! How delightful!

Vinyl stopped the drum beat and looked at Turing, raising an eyebrow at her.

“Do you have an inquiry?” Turing Test asked.

Vinyl tapped the turntable with one hoof, then pointed at Turing, then held her hoof flat-side up.

“I am not certain that I understand. Are you inquiring about my motivations? You wish to know why I wish to learn from you?”

Vinyl smiled and nodded.

“Understood.” She looked down at the turntable. “This is a machine that makes music, despite the fact that it has no apparent sentience.” She then tapped her own chest, staring directly at Vinyl Scratch. “I am also a machine, though I am sentient. Perhaps I am also capable of making music.”

She paused for a moment, tapping her chin as she considered the unspoken question further.

“Music is something that organic ponies seem to enjoy. I have little experience with it personally, but I am able to appreciate the mathematical simplicity and the intricacies of it. Therefore, in a way, I am able to appreciate something that organics also enjoy. By learning to produce music, perhaps I will be able to bond more with organic ponies and understand them better, and they in turn will understand more about me.”

Vinyl let a grin slowly cross her face.

“Is my explanation sufficient?”

Vinyl nodded, her grin becoming a bright, toothy smile.

“Hey, look at all these records!” Scootaloo exclaimed, looking through a stack of records nearby. “She’s got Sapphire Shores’s album! And… what are some of these other ones?”

Sweetie Belle used her fledgling magic to lift the records and examine the names of the artists on them. “Let’s see… Orbitrot, Paul Oatenfold, Neighphex Twin - ugh, the pony on this one looks kind of creepy - the Talon Parsnips Project, deadh0r5e, Clydesdale Harris, Porter Trotinson, Draft Punk…”

Vinyl beamed with pride, pleased with her collection.

Sweetie Belle narrowed her eyes. “I have no idea who any of these ponies are,” she said flatly.

Vinyl’s horn glowed, and she yanked the records away with a scowl.

Octavia chuckled, covering her mouth with one hoof.

“I do not know much,” Turing said, getting Vinyl’s attention, “but I wish to see if there is a style of music that matches my style of speech or playing. I am told that I sound ‘artificial.’ Since the music you make is likewise synthetic, perhaps you are the best pony to help me.”

Vinyl heaved a sigh but finally smiled and gave a nod.

“Yeah, all right.”

The Crusaders all gave a start and stared at Vinyl in wide-eyed disbelief. Turing Test likewise let her ears go straight.

“Y-you…” Scootaloo said, “you can talk?!”

“Pfft,” Vinyl scoffed, “of course I can! No idea what made you think I couldn’t!”

All three fillies rolled their eyes in unison.

“Okay, Turing,” Vinyl said, putting her foreleg around Turing’s shoulder, “you wanna give this a shot, then I think I know just what to do!”

“I am glad to hear that. How shall we proceed?”

“You said you tried singing, right?”

Turing nodded.

“Lemme hear it!”

“Acknowledged.” She raised her head slightly, then paused. “However, the last song I sang had a negative reception. Perhaps if I sang something different.”

“Whatever you like,” Vinyl said, shrugging her shoulders.

“Oh, I know!” Sweetie said. “Here, Turing, this is a tune I learned a little while ago! Just do it like I do!”

They all listened as Sweetie sang the first few bars of a simple melody, her high, lilting voice hitting each note with perfect accuracy.

“Now you!” Sweetie Belle said, smiling at Turing.

“Understood. Initiating…”

She raised her head and mimicked the melody that Sweetie Belle sang in her own voice. As before, the tinny quality, the lack of transition between notes, and the same artificiality of her singing were evident.

“Yes, well,” Octavia said, shaking her head. “You can see the problem, Vinyl.”

But Vinyl was only standing there, frozen in place, until her jaw dropped.

“Whoa,” she breathed. “Whoaaaa!” she repeated, more loudly this time. She practically bounded forward on her hooves. “Octavia, you were right! Sweet Celestia on a unicycle, that was awesome!”

“It was?” Turing echoed, just as perplexed by Vinyl’s enthusiastic reception.

“I thought you might appreciate her singing style, Vinyl,” Octavia said, smiling warmly. “You seem to have an affinity for synthetic sound, after all.”

“You thought right!” Vinyl said, and she took Turing Test by the shoulders. “That sound! That metallic echo! The way you hit each note clear as a bell with no change between notes! That’s incredible! It’s… it’s perfect! It’s beautiful!”

Turing took a step back. “Beautiful?” She looked away. “I… you truly think my voice is beautiful?”

“Heck yeah!” Vinyl said, practically bouncing on her hooves. “Oh man, I gotta record this! I’ve been working on this track called ‘Amethyst Caverns,’ and--”

“Coincidentally, my eyes and the stones in my legs are amethyst.”

“Heyyy, even better! See, like, I’ve got the tune laid down, but I keep thinking I need a vocal track for it. But every time I record a voice for it, even with the effects, it doesn’t sound right. But that sound you’ve got is just right!” Then her grin grew even wider. “Hey, do you think you could make it sound even more… uh… what’s a good way to put it… ‘robotic?’”

“Wait a minute!” Octavia exclaimed. “You want her to sound even less like a normal pony?!”

“Pfft,” Vinyl said, rolling her eyes behind her shades, “normal’s boring! She’s got a sound that isn’t like anypony else! If I can get that recorded… ohhh wow, this is gonna be sick!”

Turing raised a hoof. “I do not wish to make anypony sick.”

“No, I mean this is gonna kill at the clubs!”

“I certainly do not wish to kill anypony.”

As the others groaned, Vinyl Scratch simply burst out laughing, holding her belly. “You’re hilarious! Nah, relax, ‘Bots! I just mean everypony’s gonna love it!”

“Ah, I see. That is much better.”

Vinyl turned to the others. “Hey, I’d kinda like to work on this in private with Turing Test here. Octavia, why don’t you and the fillies here go practice or hang or whatever and meet us back here in a little bit. Like, I dunno… an hour?”

Octavia nodded. “Very well. I look forward to the finished product.”

“Aww, but I wanted to see them practice!” Scootaloo whined as Octavia ushered her and the other Crusaders out the door.

Once they were gone, Vinyl grinned at Turing Test. “Okay, so, um… this thing I’ve been working on? It… it doesn’t really have lyrics.”

Turing tilted her head to the side. “Then what shall I sing?”

“Ehhhh, words are overrated,” Vinyl said, waving a hoof dismissively. “That’s why I usually don’t like to talk in public. But you’ve got me all excited!”

“Instead, let’s just jam a little bit, and you can figure out how you wanna sing it. Just sing random syllables, like you’re singing in a language nopony speaks except you.”

Turing was silent as she considered that and watched while Vinyl went back to her turntable. She flipped some switches, and a drum beat started.

***

About an hour later, Octavia and the Crusaders, along with a few of the other ponies from around the Guild entered the practice room after Turing had told them that they were ready.

“Ooh!” Sweetie Belle cried, walking over to where Vinyl and Turing Test were standing. “Did you finish your song?”

Vinyl nodded, flashing a grin. Turing nodded as well.

“Um… are you gonna play it for us?”

Vinyl nodded.

Sweetie’s face fell. “You’re back to the ‘no talking’ thing again, aren’t you?”

Vinyl’s grin became smug, and she nodded one final time.

“Never mind all that,” Octavia said, shushing the gathered ponies. “All right Vinyl, Turing… show us what you’ve got!”

The crowd of ponies stood all around, less than a dozen of them, as Vinyl turned on her devices and adjusted the volume on her speakers one final time. Stage lights overhead came on as she used her magic to pull the shades of the windows down and dim the room.

Nearby was a microphone on a stand; Turing Test went up to it, tapping it once lightly before looking to Vinyl and giving a nod.

Vinyl flipped the switch.

A drum beat began, this time accompanied by the hollow, ringing sound of synthetic bells. The tinkling sound echoed slightly, though it wasn’t clear if it was because of the room or because of an effect Vinyl had added.

After this short intro, Turing raised her head and began to sing.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1EzYL_LdQr0

They all stood awestruck. The sound that came from her wasn’t like her normal voice. It was indeed somehow more robotic, the notes still stiff with no transition, but she sang a simple melody where the notes hung in the air. As she sang, a bass line began, a synthetic electric guitar accompanying her. The words she sang were strange, unfamiliar monosyllables, yet the tone, the strange, alien tone, struck something in them. Something mystifying and yet… perhaps somber?

Many ponies began to nod their heads to the beat, while others merely stared on as the mechanical pony before them sounded out each echoing syllable. The Crusaders all glanced at each other, mutual expressions of glee and excitement on their faces as they quietly cheered.

The song slowly came to an end, the drum beat trailing off and Turing’s voice growing softer and more distant, until at last it was over.

Silence hung momentarily. Turing gently put her ears back.

Then the crowd erupted in loud cheers, hollering and stomping their hooves in applause. Octavia bounded over to Vinyl.

“Vinyl! That was wonderful! One of your finest yet!”

Vinyl flashed another grin and held out a hoof.

“Oh ho… I think you’ve earned it,” Octavia laughed, and tapped her hoof to Vinyl’s.

Turing Test, meanwhile, was glancing all around her at the ponies cheering, and her ears shot straight up. Her song had been a success! She had found her voice and sung along with music that fit her perfectly! Her Crusader friends’ efforts hadn’t gone to waste!

She glanced back at her flank. There was a telltale gleam as a bright light shone from it!

But then she moved slightly and saw that the light was only the stage light reflecting off her metallic hull. There was nothing there. There was no cutie mark.

Attempt failed.

She continued staring at it, as if what she was seeing was an error. But there was no error.

Attempt failed. Cutie mark is not present. Despite my efforts, I have not discovered my special talent.

The Crusaders all ran up to Turing.

“That was great, Turing Test!” Scootaloo cried.

“Yeah, maybe you should do more o’ this kind o’ music!” Apple Bloom added.

Sweetie Belle was actually still bouncing from excitement. “It was great, Turing! I never knew this type of music could be this fun!” she exclaimed, her voice squeaking.

But Turing only hung her head. “Thank you… however, it seems that our efforts were unsuccessful. I still have no cutie mark.”

The fillies all frowned, their ears drooping.

“Ah… but still, I appreciate your efforts.” She glanced over at Vinyl and Octavia. “And I am also grateful to you. You enabled me to discover a new ability. Even if it is not my special talent.”

Octavia and Vinyl exchanged glances, then offered mutual smiles.

“It… it was a wonderful effort regardless,” Octavia said. “A very memorable piece that I’m certain will become popular!”

Vinyl tapped her chest, nodding solemnly.

“I am glad. However, I… I believe I should go.”

The gathered musicians and the Crusaders all watched her as she slowly trudged back through the doors and out into the hall before picking up speed and running off, her hooves pounding on the wooden floor as she dashed off.

The Crusaders paused a moment.

“Should we… keep trying?” Sweetie Belle asked.

“Well… o’ course we should!” Apple Bloom said decisively. “We said we were gonna try an’ help ‘er, an’ now she just feels worse!”

“You’re right, Apple Bloom!” Scootaloo added. “Let’s catch up to her!”

***

It wasn’t hard to find her; they simply had to ask if anypony had seen a robot running by. Turing was, after all, very hard not to notice.

They’d expected her to be in Twilight’s castle. Instead, she was in the park, sitting alone on a bench.

“Uh… h-hey Turing,” Apple Bloom said, smiling gently at her.

“Hello, Apple Bloom and Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle. I see you have followed me.”

There was a long pause between them as nopony knew what to say.

“Do you mind if we sit with you?” Sweetie Belle asked.

Turing shook her head.

The Crusaders all sat down on the park bench with her. A sharp crack was heard, and the bench finally gave way under the weight of a robot and three fillies.

“Ummmm,” Scootaloo said, unsure of what else to say as she picked herself up, dusting the splintered remains of the bench from her backside and tail.

“Scootaloo, will you check my flank?” Turing asked.

“W-why?” she asked hesitantly.

“It is possible that my special talent is destroying chairs by sitting on them.”

Scootaloo chuckled nervously and glanced at Turing’s flank.

“Hey, it’s there!”

“It is?!” Turing asked, glancing back.

Her flank was bare.

She turned to face Scootaloo, constricting her eyes as the little pegasus filly grinned sheepishly.

“Eh heh heh…”

“That is not amusing,” Turing said.

Apple Bloom lightly smacked Scootaloo upside the head. “What’s the matter with you, Scootaloo?!” she cried.

“Well, I just thought it would lighten the mood!”

“Hey, stop fighting, you two!” Sweetie Belle said. She gently put her little hoof on Turing’s. “Listen, Turing,” she said, “it’s… it’s okay. I mean, we all tried again and again to get our cutie marks before we finally did! It would have been nice to help you get one in a day, but, well… maybe that was a little unrealistic.”

“Perhaps,” Turing said, “but as you said, I am proficient in many skills. I thought that perhaps making music would be different, would be my special talent. However, even though I greatly enjoyed it and felt as though it was something I could devote myself to, I did not receive a cutie mark.”

She stood up, her ears completely lowered. “I believe that my first assumption was correct. Robots do not get cutie marks.”

And then a gruff new voice was heard: “Hmph! Ponies!”

They turned to look behind them. A donkey with a wrinkled muzzle and a shock of orange hair atop his head was standing by the ruined park bench.

“Cranky!” the Crusaders all exclaimed.

“We haven’t seen you since the wedding!” Sweetie Belle said.

Cranky allowed himself a bit of a smile. “Well, Matilda and I have been enjoying our honeymoon. It was a long one, but, well, we figured it was overdue.”

The fillies all smiled, and Sweetie even let out an affectionate “Awww!”

Cranky blushed slightly and coughed. “So what’s all this about a cutie mark?”

“Oh, well,” Scootaloo said, gesturing at Turing Test, “this is Turing Test! She’s a robot and--”

“Yeah, yeah, I know who she is! I read the paper, ya know!”

Turing stepped over the smashed bench and bowed slightly. “Hello. Unless I am mistaken, you are called Cranky? It is nice to meet you.”

“Likewise,” he mumbled, bowing back. “So, what’s all this I hear about a cutie mark?”

Turing Test told him all about her adventures that day with the Crusaders and about her attempt to get one related to music, all to no avail.

“So, upset about a cutie mark, are ya?” Cranky said, absentmindedly scratching one of his long, floppy ears. “Why?”

Turing Test was quiet for a moment before replying, “A cutie mark would allow me to know more of what I should specialize in. Furthermore, it is something that ponies desire as a means of identifying themselves. And… I believed that a cutie mark would enable me to be more like organic ponies.”

“Hm,” Cranky sniffed, raising an eyebrow. “Ya know what I am?”

Turing’s ears twitched as she considered the question. “Married?”

“No!” He paused, chuckling. “Well, yeah, but that’s not what I meant. I’m a donkey.”

“Ah.”

“See my flank?”

Turing Test peered around him. “Affirmative,” she replied.

“No cutie mark,” he said. “Donkeys don’t get ‘em.”

“But ponies do.”

“And you’re a pony?” he asked, raising an eyebrow. “You may look like one, an’ maybe in some weird way you are one, but maybe you aren’t the type that gets a cutie mark. Tough break, kid.”

Turing lowered her head.

The Crusaders rushed to Turing’s side. “H-hey, Mr. Cranky, don’t be mean to her!” Sweetie Belle said.

“Yeah!” Apple Bloom chimed in, scowling at him. “She’s a pretty darn special pony even without a cutie mark!”

Cranky smirked. “That right?”

“Yeah, that is right!” Scootaloo shot back. “She’s awesome! She’s smart, she’s crazy strong, and she can even play music and sing! And she can fly and use magic! That’s something only alicorns can do!”

“Well,” he said, chuckling. “She sounds pretty special. Matter of fact,” he continued, looking straight at Turing Test with a smirk, “I’ve been hearing all about this strange robot pony that’s been going around town helping this pony and that pony and so-and-so and whoever-their-name is all over town today. A few months ago, ponies were still talkin’ about you like some kinda Boogeymare. Guess you made an impression on the town. Sorta seems like you did on these little kids too.”

The Crusaders fell silent. Turing’s eyes constricted to tiny dots.

“Then you are saying that my efforts were not wasted. The lack of a cutie mark does not negate my abilities or the things I have learned or the progress I have made with the citizens of Ponyville.”

Cranky winked at her. “You got it, kid. Heh.” He raised his head, adjusting his toupee slightly. “See, us donkeys don’t have any special mark telling us what makes us special. When I was just a kid like these youngsters, I asked my old mom why we didn’t get one. She told me that ponies might be lucky because they had a mark to tell ‘em what they were good at… but us? We could figure it out for ourselves, and that wasn’t too bad either.

“So now, if donkeys don’t get cutie marks, or griffons, or dragons, or sea monsters, or whatever… then does it matter that much if robots can get one or not?”

Turing’s ears twitched again, and she bowed deeply to Cranky. “I see now. You are very wise, Mr. Cranky. Thank you.”

“H-hey, come on, get up,” he said, his blush returning. He glanced around, hoping nopony was watching. “I’m not some hotshot Canterlot royal or anything. I’m just an old donkey who’s been around and seen a lot.”

He sighed and turned to go. “I better get moving. I left Matilda feeding the ducks. Take care, kids.”

The Crusaders and Turing Test all watched him go, waving to him.

“Wow…” Scootaloo said, breaking the silence. “Cranky’s actually kind of… well, cool!”

“Agreed,” Turing said. “He is. However, he is not the only one I should be thanking.”

She turned back to the three fillies. “You spent the entire day assisting me, providing me with opportunities to meet more ponies and prove my usefulness to them. I did not realize this at the time, but I believe you have allowed me to form more bonds and create opportunities for more friendships, which is, after all, my primary directive. Thank you, my young friends.”

The Crusaders smiled and all came over to embrace her. She returned the hug, enjoying the quiet moment as they stood there in park as the sun slowly set over the horizon.

When the hug ended, Apple Bloom asked, “So, uh, do ya wanna try an’ get a cutie mark tomorrow? I mean, I know we decided that it doesn’t really matter an’ all, but if ya just want to…”

Turing shook her head. “No. I will do as you did: I will focus my efforts toward opening more doors and exploring my abilities, rather than on earning my mark. Should I receive a cutie mark, then I will gladly bear it. If I do not, then that is also satisfactory.

“However,” she added, crouching slightly to look at them on their level, “if you wish to ‘hang out’ again, I will be happy to keep you company.”

The three of them all chuckled and said their goodbyes as Turing Test went back in the direction of the castle.

“You know, Turing’s really cool too,” Scootaloo said to her friends as they watched Turing go.

“Yeah!” Sweetie said. “I kinda wish I was a robot!”

Apple Bloom scoffed. “You as a robot, Sweetie Belle? That’s ridiculous!”

***

The next day, Turing was in her room practicing her magic when there was a knock at the door. She set down the books she’d been levitating and went to the door to answer it. Twilight Sparkle stood there with another pony next to her.

“Hello, Twilight Sparkle,” she said. She glanced at the maroon earth pony mare who was with her. “I believe I have seen you when I was retrieving Apple Bloom from school. Are you identified as Miss Cheerilee, her teacher?”

“Why, yes!” Cheerilee replied. “It’s so nice to meet you, Turing Test! I saw you pick up Apple Bloom from school, but I wasn’t able to introduce myself at the time. And please, you can just call me Cheerilee. I’m only ‘Miss’ Cheerilee to my students.”

Turing nodded. “Understood. Then, in turn, please refer to me as simply ‘Turing,’ or a nickname of your choosing.”

Cheerilee laughed as Twilight stepped forward. “Turing, Cheerilee has something to ask you. I want you to know that it’s okay to say yes or no, and I won’t pressure you to make one decision instead of another.”

Turing cocked her head to the side. “You have an inquiry? Or a request?”

“Wellll,” Cheerilee said, her eyes darting up as she considered the question, “it’s more of an offer than either of those. Um, Turing, I’m directing a local play, and all the parts have been cast, but, well, there’s one part that I’m thinking of recasting.”

Turing didn’t reply, continuing to stand there in silence.

“Er, I mean… well, Turing, would you like to be in the play?”

Turing’s eyes twitched, but a second later, she gave her reply: “Affirmative.”

To be continued…

Author's Notes:

Looks like the show must go on!

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this music-themed chapter. I don't normally include a YouTube video in the middle of the text, but I figured, in this one case, taking advantage of the medium might be warranted.

Can you name that reference in 3 notes?

-The title of this chapter, "Music Sounds Better With You," isn't a Daft Punk song, per se, but it was done by Thomas Bangalter, who is one of the two members of Daft Punk, so close enough.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hf244LCkkLc

-Probably the most obvious one is the names of various pony musicians. First and foremost is Pommelbel, named after Pachelbel, and whose "Canon in D" is a pretty well known piece.

-The other pony artists are all also references to famous artists in the EDM genre. In order: Orbitrot (Orbital), Paul Oatenfold (Paul Oakenfold), Neighphex Twin (Aphex Twin), the Talon Parsnips Project (the Alan Parsons Project), deadh0r3e (deadmau5), Clydesdale Harris (Calvin Harris), Porter Trotinson (Porter Robinson), and Draft Punk (obvious, but the horse pun is that a certain kind of horse is called a "Draft Horse").

-Less a reference and more an inspiration is the scene where Turing is trying to play the piano and not quite sounding right. The scene, right down to the very difficult song she plays is a reference to a sequence in a particular episode of the anime series "The Big O."

-It took 41 and some odd chapters to do it, but, finally, you got a mention of Sweetie Belle talking about being a robot, which is a begrudging nod to "Sweetie Bot," from the MLP series Friendship is Witchcraft. You're welcome.

The song Turing sings, if you didn't catch it, is called "Amethyst Caverns" by Module. It comes from the Shatter video game soundtrack, which I listen to frequently when I write, and that song in particular was one of the songs that first got me thinking about writing a story about robots. It's also why Turing's eyes are amethyst stones and why she has them in her brooches. Give the whole soundtrack a listen, if you enjoyed it.

Background ponies you might not know in this chapter:

Royal Riff

Noteworthy

The Day the Sun Stood Still

View Online

Cheerilee blinked. “Oh,” she said flatly before giving Turing Test a smile. “I’m sorry, I just didn’t think you’d accept right away like that.”

“Neither did I,” Twilight said, raising an eyebrow. “Um, Turing, are you sure that you want to just blindly agree to a role in Cheerilee’s play like that?”

Turing cocked her head to the side. “I do not understand your confusion,” she replied. “Both of you seemed to find the idea of me performing in a play to be acceptable. If you did not think such a thing was wise, why did you offer me a role?”

“Well, it’s just, um,” Twilight said, scratching her head, “usually actors want to know the role they’re taking, first.”

“It is my understanding that actors in a play must perform certain scripted actions and recite pre-written lines. Such a task would be very simple for me to do. Therefore, I believe I will be up to the task. Also,” she said, looking to Cheerilee, “this is the first time that a member of the community outside of our central group of friends has deliberately sought my assistance or participation, Twilight Sparkle. As my primary directive is to make friends, this is a unique opportunity to prove myself a friendly and helpful member of this community. I see no reason to deny Cheerilee’s request.”

“Oh!” Cheerilee said, her smile broadening. “That’s so sweet! I’m glad you’ll help us!”

Twilight sighed and smiled as well. “I suppose you’re right when you put it like that, Turing,” she said. Then she turned to Cheerilee. “So, um, what kind of play is this, anyway?”

Cheerilee opened her mouth to answer. “It’s a--”

“Oh, wait, is this a classic drama by Shakey Pear?” Twilight asked eagerly, her wings spreading in excitement. “That would be wonderful! Maybe Turing could play the lead in Hooflet! Or Shy Rock in The Merchant of Veneighs!”

“No, no, nothing like that,” Cheerilee said, shaking her head, “it’s--”

“Or maybe a musical review of The Tundra Book? I remember seeing that back in Canterlot right before Shining Armor graduated basic training for the Royal Guard and I was just singing those songs for days--”

“A-hem,” Cheerilee said, clearing her throat and giving Twilight a soft yet pointed look she’d perfected on her students.

“Oh, of course, sorry,” Twilight said, blushing slightly. “You were saying?”

“I was saying,” Cheerilee said, turning back to Turing Test, “that it’s a science fiction story that takes place in an alternate Equestria. It’s about a space pony that travels to our planet.”

“An interesting premise,” Turing said, giving an approving nod. “Then, do you wish for me to play this alien?”

Cheerilee’s smile became slightly more strained, and she looked away. “A-actually, Turing Test, we were hoping you’d play the part of the alien’s, um… r-robot companion.”

There was silence in the crystalline hall of Twilight’s castle. Twilight’s eye twitched.

“I am curious, Cheerilee,” Turing said, breaking the silence between the three of them. “Is this what is sometimes known as ‘typecasting?’”

“Or maybe just ‘stereotyping!’” Twilight exclaimed, scowling at Cheerilee.

“N-now, please, hear me out!” Cheerilee said, holding up her hooves. “I know what you must think, but I have a good reason for asking Turing Test this! You see, the character - originally called an ‘automaton’ in the play - is actually one of the most iconic characters from it. The character is supposed to be silent and strong and intimidating, so we, uh, cast Big Mac in the role.”

Twilight chuckled. “I can see why that would work.”

“Yes, but, unfortunately, he’s very good at the ‘silent’ and ‘strong’ parts. The ‘intimidating’ part… well, he certainly tries, but no matter what we do, he just doesn’t seem threatening or scary enough.”

Turing’s ears twitched. “You are offering me the role because you think I am scary?”

Cheerilee shook her head. “No, we’re offering you the role because you, well, actually look like a robot. Don’t think of it as stereotyping so much as, well, playing to your strengths! After all, we don’t ask earth ponies to play roles meant for pegasi! We figured that since you’re a real robot, maybe you could bring something else to the performance. Besides, even if you aren’t scary in real life, they call it ‘acting’ for a reason!”

Turing tapped her chin. “Then this will be the first time a fictional automaton has been played by a real one? And I would have to adapt to the role for an accurate portrayal?”

Cheerilee nodded. “Yes, exactly!”

Turing was quiet for a moment, then replied, “Very well. I accept the role.”

“Oh thank you, thank you!” Cheerilee exclaimed, taking Turing by the metallic hoof. “Practice is this afternoon at 4 pm. We open in a week, but you should be able to learn your part in no time!”

After some more expressions of thanks and a few more details about the rehearsal schedule, Cheerilee happily galloped out of the castle, eager to continue preparations for the play.

Twilight had stood by quietly the whole time, watching with a placid smile as Cheerilee and Turing Test had discussed the finer points of the play.

“You are still not entirely certain that I should have accepted,” Turing said, looking directly at Twilight once Cheerilee had gone.

“I… oh, what the hay, I won’t deny it,” Twilight sighed. She began walking up the hallway, heading toward the library with Turing Test trailing her. “It’s not that I think Cheerilee means anything by it, and I understand your logic in accepting the role, but… I just wish you were playing a friendly role! You know, something that will show the audience how kind and sweet you are!”

“That had occurred to me as well,” Turing said, “but if ponies are capable of acting as characters with different personalities from their own and are sometimes praised for their ability to do so, then perhaps I should attempt this as well. I find the idea of portraying a fictional character for a public display of fantasy to be a strange concept, but nonetheless an intriguing one.”

Twilight paused and raised her eyebrow. “Strange? What do you mean?”

“With a film or a play, the audience is aware of the fact that the ponies they are seeing are not truly the characters they pretend to be. The locations, situations, and lines of dialogue are all planned, and virtually nothing is spontaneous. Yet audience members are able to somehow accept that and enjoy reveling in the fantasy, even knowing it is not real.”

“Ah,” Twilight said, nodding, “you mean suspension of disbelief.”

“If that is the term, then yes.” She held up her hoof, glancing at her reflection in it. “I have had difficulty suspending my own disbelief as an audience member, as when I recently watched a film with the Cutie Mark Crusaders and made various comments pointing out the weakness of the portrayal. I am curious to learn if participating as a performer, rather than an audience member, will help me understand more about the phenomenon.”

Twilight rubbed her chin. “Hmm. I have to admit, now I’m curious as well! Well, you’ve got no shortage of good reasons to do this play, Turing, and I respect your right to make your own decisions. You have my permission and my blessing to do this play.”

Turing bowed her head. “Thank you, Twilight Sparkle. I look forward to the experience. Also, will you attend my performance?”

Twilight laughed. “How could I miss it?”

Turing’s ears twitched. “By not coming, of course,” she replied.

Twilight groaned. “I meant yes, of course I’ll come!” She heaved a sigh. “Now come on, Turing. Before you break into show business, we’ve got some more magic practice today!”

***

At exactly 4 pm, Turing Test walked through the front doors of the Ponyville Theater Center. The building had stood in Ponyville for decades, getting renovations every once in a while, but Turing noticed pictures on the wall in the lobby that showed how the building looked ages ago. There were also pictures, most in black and white, from past performances. Turing paused to glance at the labels beneath them. One was of a young filly with her mane in curls looking up at a stallion in a fancy business suit.

The caption read “Young Mary Mare as the lead in Little Orphan Appy with Mr. Strike-It Rich as Daddy Morebucks.”

“Turing Test, you’re here!”

Turing Test turned to see Cheerilee standing at the doors that led from the lobby and into the main part of the theater.

“Hello, Cheerilee. I apologize if I am tardy. I delayed slightly to examine the pictures on the wall.”

“Oh, no, you’re fine,” Cheerilee said, smiling sweetly. She went over to one of the pictures on the wall and put her hoof next to it. “Wonderful, aren’t they? They really show you the history of this community. And that’s why I’ve been performing in the local theater ever since I was a filly. I’m really excited to be directing this year’s production, too! It seems that everypony has developed an interest in science fiction lately. I wonder,” she said, giving a sly, sideways glance over at Turing Test, “what or who could have spurred on that kind of interest?”

Turing was quiet for a moment, then replied, “Ah. You are implying that it is me.”

Cheerilee laughed and rolled her eyes. “Yes, I am. It seems that all the recent commotion you’ve caused since you arrived a few months ago has really affected this town.” She smiled again, laying her hoof on Turing’s shoulder. “And I think in a good way.”

“That is good to know,” Turing replied. “Shall we begin our rehearsal?”

“Well, first,” Cheerilee said, beckoning her to enter the theater, “come meet everypony working on the production! I think they’ll all be excited to see you!”

Turing followed Cheerilee into the theater. The large room was lined with seats and there was an aisle down the middle, as well as two on the sides. There were also stairs on either side of the stage, which was adorned with a prodigious red curtain. There was also a small orchestra pit in front of the stage, though it was empty at the moment. On the stage, a few dozen ponies were holding up their scripts, going over their lines or reciting them from memory.

“Good afternoon, everypony!” Cheerilee said loudly, getting their attention.

The group all looked up and greeted her back in a cacophony of voices which only grew once they saw Turing Test behind her.

“Oh, wow, Turing’s here!” came a familiar voice. Turing recognized it in an instant and located the speaker as she bounded off the stage.

“Hello, Bon Bon,” Turing said as she came over to them. “Are you also a performer in this play?”

“You’re looking at the female lead!” she said, putting a hoof to her chest proudly. She then turned to Cheerilee. “So, does this mean what I think it does, Cheerilee?”

“It sure does!” Cheerilee exclaimed, looking up at the others. “Turing Test has agreed to be our new Gert!”

The ponies gathered all cheered.

Turing looked to Cheerilee. “‘Gert?’ I do not know this term.”

“That’s the name of the character you’ll be playing, Turing,” Cheerilee said.

“Ah, then I suppose I can stop trying to fix this costume,” said another familiar voice from stage right.

Turing looked up and saw Rarity standing there, her mane out of place and looking frazzled.

“That’s right, Rarity,” Cheerilee said, walking up onto the stage, Turing following her. “Now you can focus on the other costumes instead.”

“Thank Celestia,” Rarity sighed. “No offense, Big Mac, but getting your costume right has been quite trying!”

Big Mac poked his head out from behind the curtain. “Eeyup,” he said, nodding in agreement. He stepped out into view, and they saw he was wearing silver boots and a glittering tank top that looked far too small for him, as well as some bits of tin foil.

“Ah,” Turing Test said, her ears going straight. She looked from Cheerilee to Big Mac and back again. “Cheerilee, did you inform Big Mac that you offered me his role?” She looked up at Big Mac, her eyes shrinking as she backed away. “I did not intend to take your part from you without your knowledge.”

But Cheerilee and Big Mac just chuckled.

“No, no, Turing,” Cheerilee said, putting her foreleg around Turing’s shoulders. “Big Mac was just getting into costume in case… well, we weren’t certain that Twilight was totally on board for this idea, and we didn’t want to be left unprepared if she decided not to give you permission.”

“And I didn’t really care anyway,” Big Mac said, smiling back at Turing. “I only agreed to help out Miss Cheerilee. She said I can still be an extra in a crowd scene. Right, Miss Cheerilee?”

Cheerilee nodded. “Eeyup!” she replied, causing them both to break into laughter.

“Well, now that that’s settled,” Rarity said, “I can focus on the rest of the wardrobe, including your dress, Bon Bon.”

“Great, Rarity!” Bon Bon said, trotting up the stage to stand next to her. “I can’t wait to try it on.”

“Yes, I believe I’ve captured the old-fashioned feel of the time the play was written in! The style is a bit dated, but there is a bit of a charm in it, just the same!”

“Any other problems, Rarity?” Cheerilee asked.

“Just a few,” Rarity replied. “I have to let out a certain gentlecolt’s lab coat by a few centimeters.” She shot a glare across the stage. Turing followed her gaze and saw the Doctor standing there.

The Doctor blushed as they all looked at him. “Ah, well, yes… I suppose I have been sneaking in a few extra jelly babies here and there…”

“Hello, Doctor,” Turing Test said, waving to him.

“Hello, Miss Turing! I see you’ve been bitten by the acting bug as well!”

She was about to comment on that but realized he was using another idiom and simply replied, “Affirmative.”

“Okay, everypony, we’re going to do a full runthrough in just a few minutes!” Cheerilee said, clapping her hooves together to get everypony’s attention. “Don’t forget, dress rehearsal is Friday and opening night is Saturday, so be sure to prepare and practice! We want this play to operate like a well-oiled machine!”

“Like me,” Turing added, which got a round of laughter from the rest of the cast.

As everyone scrambled to get in place and prepare for their scenes, Cheerilee came up to Turing Test, holding a script in her hoof.

“Turing, this is a script for the play,” she said, passing it to her. “Please try to familiarize yourself with it.”

“Understood.” She opened the script, flipping through the pages rapidly as she scanned them. She then gave it back to Cheerilee. “I am now sufficiently familiarized with the script.”

Cheerilee gawked at her. Once she regained her composure, she said, “Remind me to give you a speaking role sometime.” Turning away and muttering to herself, she added, “It would be nice to have an actor that had no trouble memorizing their lines, next time.”

***

Celestia and Luna looked down at the documents spread before them. They both stood in a private room of their castle with several officials from the Royal Guard and the Night Guard positioned around the broad, circular table.

“Still no leads to their whereabouts, I see,” Celestia said.

“Correct, Your Majesty,” said one of the Royal Guard.

“And you’re sure,” Luna said, breaking the silence, “that you can find no evidence linking any of the suspects on Gadget’s list to these traitors?”

A mare thestral, the head Night Guard representative, stepped forward, bowing and lowering her batlike wings. “No, Your Majesty,” she said. “We have examined each of these individuals, sending our best ponies to gather information and working in close conjunction with the Royal Guard to investigate each one.”

“But after months,” the Royal Guard, a stallion, said, “we haven’t found anything conclusive.”

Celestia glanced down at the list, examining each of the pictures taken to see if there was anything that leapt out at her. Unfortunately, nothing did.

After months of investigating, any leads they’d originally possessed had dried up. Turing’s creators, the ones who had sent Fine Print, Blue Blazer, and Burrojangles, had vanished with nary a trace. They’d found scraps of evidence here and there - a warehouse in Manehattan, a bunker in Fillydelphia, and even an entire train car’s worth of materials that had been reported missing by an industrial company - but nothing conclusive.

Celestia re-examined the list of names that Gadget had compiled. They included the family from Mustangia that had originally created the farming automaton now displayed in the Manehattan museum, a Manehattan steel tycoon with ample access to factories and raw materials, a Trottingham banking magnate, an oil baron based out of Fillydelphia, and several automaton enthusiasts. Each one, the guards now reported, was apparently uninvolved. Some of them had practices Celestia found personally distasteful, though not technically illegal, but none appeared to be part of anything more sinister than that.

“If I may, Your Majesties,” the Royal Guardspony began, “it’s possible that our efforts have driven this group underground. We have put our best ponies on the job and interrogated dozens of suspects, all to no avail.”

Celestia frowned, rubbing her chin. “Is it possible they could have simply disbanded?”

The Royal Guardspony frowned. “That is possible. But… not likely.”

Luna glanced at the Night Guardspony. “Do you also believe this is so, Agent? Do you believe the group has not disbanded and is still active?”

The Night Guard shut her yellow eyes and shook her head. “Yes, Your Majesty. Though it is possible that they’ve broken up, my experience tells me that this group has indeed gone underground but remains active. A group so organized and dedicated that it would create something like the automaton Turing Test is unlikely to simply fall apart under pressure, especially when we haven’t found out anything truly substantial about it.”

“If that is the case,” Celestia said, “then I suppose we have no choice but to continue the investigation. Please continue monitoring all suspects and use any methods at your disposal within the bounds of the law to find these culprits.”

Luna nodded her assent.

Then Celestia and Luna both spread their wings, simultaneously saying “Dismissed!”

Both the Royal and Night Guardsponies saluted. “Yes, Your Majesties!” they said in unison.

Once they’d gone, Celestia heaved a sigh.

“I know how you feel,” Luna said, resting her head on her elder sister’s shoulder. “Even with all the resources we have at our disposal, to be no closer to finding these criminals is…” She trailed off, also heaving a sigh.

“Yes, Luna, but we must get to the bottom of this. I fear this group will strike again and we will not be prepared for them.” She bit her lip, furrowing her brow.

“Do not trouble yourself so much,” Luna said, nuzzling her lightly. “You know, perhaps we should do something amusing to take our minds off this dreadful business.”

Celestia raised her head, considering this. “Perhaps…”

Just then, a wisp of green magic coalesced in the air before producing a scroll which Celestia promptly snatched up with her magic before it fell to the ground.

“Ah ha!” Luna said, peering over Celestia’s shoulder. “A letter from Twilight Sparkle, is it?”

Celestia unfurled the scroll and began reading it. A smile came to her face. “Actually, no.” She levitated the letter over to Luna, letting her read it more clearly.

“Oh my!” Luna exclaimed, her smile matching Celestia’s. “Tia, shall we? It sounds like this could be just the thing!”

“I’m inclined to agree, Luna,” Celestia said, giving a nod. “I’ll go write a reply immediately, and then we’ll have to clear our schedules!”

***

Twilight and Spike strode up to the theater alongside several other residents of Ponyville. It was opening night for Turing’s play, and the theater was lit up proudly as ponies bought their tickets and filed in.

Above the ticket booth, a sign proudly proclaimed the title of the play:

Tonight’s Performance:
“The Day the Sun Stood Still”

“Hey, Twilight! Spike!” came a familiar voice from overhead.

Twilight and Spike turned to see Rainbow Dash hovering above them, her wings gently flapping to keep her airborne.

“Rainbow Dash!” Twilight exclaimed. “Are you here for the play too?”

“Heck yeah!” she said, landing next to her. “Rarity’s doing the costumes, Tee’s acting, and I hear Pinkie’s doing some of the music! How could I miss it?”

“By not coming, of course,” Twilight said, imitating Turing’s voice and speech mannerisms.

“Huh?” Rainbow asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Never mind,” Twilight said innocently, rolling her eyes as Spike chuckled.

“Oh hey!” the little dragon said, pointing at somepony else in the crowd. “Fluttershy’s here too!”

They looked and saw that indeed Fluttershy had also arrived. She smiled when she saw them and trotted over.

“Good evening, everypony!” she said, smiling sweetly. She was wearing a simple yet elegant green dress. “Oh… um, did I overdress?”

“Nah,” Rainbow Dash said, waving a hoof dismissively. “Some ponies like to get all dressed up for the theater. Me, I keep it simple so I can eat all the popcorn I want without worrying about it getting it all over me.”

“With table manners like that,” said another familiar voice, “ya’d think it was you who was raised in a barn!”

They turned at the voice.

“Applejack!” they all exclaimed.

“Howdy!” she said, trotting up to them. “Y’all buy yer tickets yet?”

“Not yet,” Twilight replied, shaking her head.

“Well, ya best get in there if ya wanna sit together,” she said, grinning slyly. “Plus, uh, hate to be the one to tell ya this, but they don’t allow popcorn in the theater. It ain’t a movie, it’s a play.”

“Aww man!” Rainbow Dash and Spike said in unison.

Now that they were all together, they quickly bought their tickets and found their seats.

The crowd was still chattering away, and the red curtain was closed over the stage. They each held a simple printing of the show’s program which included some history of the play, an advertisement for Barnyard Bargains, the sponsor of the play, and a listing of the cast and crew. Twilight eagerly examined the listing.

Cast
Caramel as The Visitor
Bon Bon as Helen Buckson
Featherweight as Bobby Buckson
Thunderlane as Trot Steeler
The Doctor as Professor Barn Heart
Cup Cake as Mrs. Barley
Turing Test as Gert
Davenport as The Mayor’s Secretary

Twilight smiled when she saw Turing’s name on the cast list, even if she knew that she didn’t have a speaking part. There was a list of extras and other unnamed cast members, including Big Mac, she noted, and then she read the list of the crew, including the musicians:

Musicians
Piano - Noteworthy
Violin - Octavia Melody
Theremin - Pinkamena Diane Pie

There was a sudden clamor at the back of the theater which drew their attention, though the cause remained a mystery. Then Twilight spotted a few of the Royal Guard enter and take up positions at the back of the theater.

“Could it be?” Twilight breathed.

Just then, Cheerilee emerged from the curtain at the front of the stage. “Excuse me, everypony!” she hollered, raising a hoof to get everypony’s attention.

The audience all looked to her and quieted down.

“Everypony, I’m very delighted to say that our little community performance has some very special guests tonight! In addition to our own local Princess, Twilight Sparkle, tonight we are honored to have in the house… Their Royal Highnesses, Princess Celestia and Princess Luna!”

The crowd all gasped and followed her hoof as she gestured up to the box seat just above and to the left of the stage. Sure enough, Celestia and Luna emerged, waving regally to the crowd.

The audience, clamoring excitedly, all broke out into applause.

“Um, girls, would you excuse me?” Twilight asked. Without another word, she took to the air, flying up to the box seat.

Applejack noticed that Spike had folded his arms and was wearing a sly grin.

“Hey there, Spike,” she said, leaning in close, “I don’t suppose ya know somethin’ about this, do ya?”

“Mmmaybe,” he replied, raising an eyebrow.

Up in the box seat, Twilight hovered just before the railing before Celestia and Luna.

“Celestia, Luna! I… I mean, I’m glad you’re here, b-but…”

“You want to know why?” Celestia surmised, grinning at her expectantly.

Twilight nodded. Celestia stepped back so Twilight could land in the seat rather than having a conversation with her hovering over the audience.

“Well, actually, Twilight,” Celestia said, “we were invited to come.”

“Oh? By who?” she asked.

“Your friend Turing Test, of course,” Luna said, looking to her sister. “Celestia received the invitation from her, sent by Spike at her request.”

Twilight blinked and then whipped her head around to stare down at Spike, who was smugly waving up at her.

“W-why didn’t you tell me you were coming? I… I could have made arrangements, made sure you were comfortable, I could have--”

Celestia put a hoof to Twilight’s lips. “No need for that, Twilight,” Celestia said gently. “Turing Test wanted to surprise you and predicted that you’d concern yourself with preparing for our arrival rather than just enjoying the play. It seems she was right.”

“Indeed!” Luna said, nodding her head. “You should go back and be with your friends. We intend to enjoy this performance the same as you.”

“R… right, haha, of course!” Twilight said, forcing herself to smile. “I’ll… I’ll do that! Enjoy! The play, I mean!”

Twilight returned to her seat, smiling up at the two Princesses one more time as her friends all looked to her worriedly.

“Um, Twilight?” Rainbow asked. “What’s the big deal? What are you freaking out about this time?”

“I… I just,” she swallowed. “It’s this play. I don’t know much about the story, but the character Turing Test plays is actually kind of, well, dangerous and threatening. I was already worried about how this portrayal might make other ponies judge her, but now I have to worry about how Celestia and Luna will view this as well!”

She felt a hoof on her shoulder and looked over to see that it was Applejack. She was smiling at her gently.

“Now don’t fret about that, sugarcube,” she said. “Listen: if Turing Test managed to get on my good side, an’ if she’s already on good enough terms with Celestia an’ Luna to get ‘em to come here, I doubt one silly ol’ play’s gonna change anything. I’m pretty sure they can tell the difference between a play an’ reality, after all.”

“That’s…” Twilight let out a sigh, and the tension slowly drained from her. She looked up and patted Applejack’s hoof. “You’re right. Okay, I’ll just stay calm and try to enjoy the show.”

***

“All right, all right, everypony!” Cheerilee cried, bouncing on her hooves like a filly while the rest of the cast, now in costume, got into position. “Don’t even think about the Princesses being in the audience! Just do your best as usual! Now, come on, places, places!”

Turing Test came up alongside Caramel, who was wearing a silvery, futuristic suit. They both took their positions behind a large, spraypainted cardboard flying saucer.

“Your heart rate has increased slightly, Caramel,” Turing whispered.

“Yeah, but don’t worry, it’s just normal tension before the show starts. I won’t forget my lines.”

“That is good. I will not forget mine, either.”

Caramel blinked before smirking and pointing both of his forehooves at her, giving her a wink. “Ahhhhh!” he said.

She mimicked the action, pointing her forehooves at him as well. “Ahhhhh.”

***

The house lights went down, and the audience fell into a hush.

From behind the curtain, Cheerilee’s voice suddenly rang out as she began to say the opening lines of the play.

“Submitted for your approval,” she began, “an Equestria very different from our own! The year is 951 of the New Solar Calendar, and rather than being one unified nation, Equestria is divided into many city-states, each with its own interests and politics, without any Princesses to rule and guide them. Wars have come and gone, but an uneasy tension hangs over the land, as the threat of a new war is ever present! It is in this place that our story begins. Specifically, in the city of Manehattan!”

The curtain opened to reveal a cardboard backdrop of the Manehattan skyline. A stallion holding a newspaper suddenly appeared.

“Extra! Extra!” he shouted. “Astronomers sight strange object flying in the sky! Object is of unknown origin!”

More ponies began to walk onstage, their passing conversations all about the flying object.

“I hear it’s a new device from Canterlot!”

“I bet it’s actually from those dastardly Fillydelphians!”

“But they all say it’s not!”

“That’s what they want us to believe! Hmph!”

“The astronomers say it must be from another world!”

“Impossible!”

Then one pony, Big Mac in a suit and tie and fedora, pointed up at the sky. “Wait, what’s that?!” he yelled.

Twilight noted Applejack wore a grin, seeing her brother on stage.

Just then, hanging from a mostly invisible wire, a flying saucer began to float over the “buildings” in the background, creating the illusion that the thing was massive.

From the orchestra pit, eerie theremin music began to play.

The ponies on stage all began to scream and panic. The stage lights dimmed, and the curtain shut as the sound of the set being moved around was heard. When it lifted again, the scene was now in front of the flying saucer, now landed, as smoke billowed mysteriously around it. Several civilians and reporters stood by, but they were held back by ponies dressed in soldiers’ uniforms.

“General!” one of the reporters cried to the head of the military gathered there. “Do you have any comment on this situation? Do you know why the flying object landed here in Manehattan Park? Is this truly from another world, or is it a new attack by one of the other city-states?”

“Keep back and keep quiet!” the General barked. “You’re lucky we even let you reporters near this thing!”

Then, with a discordant violin note, the door of the spaceship slid open, and a pony dressed in a silvery suit with a helmet covering his entire face stepped out. Several ponies, mostly the fillies and colts in the audience, gasped in fear.

The pony in the suit, the Visitor, came down a ramp and looked around at all the ponies gathered. “We have come to visit you in peace!” he declared loudly, holding out a hoof to them. “And with good will!” He reached into the pocket of his suit and drew out a strange metallic cylinder. He began to open it.

“He’s got a weapon!” one young unicorn soldier screamed, then cast an attack spell (really just a light spell) and blasted the Visitor with it. He fell to the ground with a loud groan, dropping the cylinder in the process.

At the sound of his scream, a new figure appeared at the open door of the spaceship.

Twilight’s heart skipped a beat. It was Turing Test.

The robot pony glanced at the soldiers, who all began to fire more blasts at her, but her eyes suddenly glowed red, and the stage lights began to flash in different colors.

“Argh!” one of the soldiers cried. “My magic! My magic’s been disabled!” All the other ponies began to do the same.

With loud, heavy steps, the robot stomped down the ramp and toward the soldiers menacingly. It reared up on its hind legs, ready to attack.

“Stop, Gert!” the Visitor shouted, waving his foreleg at her. “That’s enough!”

The robot, Gert, froze instantly, its eyes going back to their usual violet color. It retreated to stand in front of the ship before its eyes went dark, as the door to the ship closed.

The General went over to the Visitor, pulling off his helmet (revealing Caramel’s face for the first time). “You… you’re a pony?”

“A creature like you,” the Visitor said, wincing in pain. “That cylinder was not a weapon. It was meant for your Mayor,” he grunted, “to study life on other planets.”

“Get a doctor over here!” the General shouted. “We’ve got to get him to a hospital!”

The curtain went down again and the ponies in the audience applauded the scene, including Celestia and Luna.

Twilight, meanwhile, sank in her seat.

“Is… something wrong?” Fluttershy asked her.

“I just wish that the first time a robot was playing a robot, it wasn’t a scary, dangerous robot like that!” Twilight groaned.

“Oh, well,” Fluttershy began, “she sure was scary, but… we all know that’s not how she is in real life!”

“Yeah, but,” Twilight sighed, “will the rest of the audience get that?”

***

The play continued. The Visitor was taken to a hospital but used a salve he brought with him to heal himself. The military was unable to get inside the saucer, so the Mayor sent a secretary to talk to the Visitor.

The Visitor asked to talk to all the leaders of the city-states simultaneously, but the secretary told him that it was impossible with the tensions running high between all the different governments. The Visitor asked to go out and see how the ponies in the city lived to understand their suspicions, but the secretary denied his request and left him under guard.

However, the Visitor soon escaped, stealing a jumpsuit in the process. The name on the jumpsuit was “Wood Cutter,” so he took the name and located a boarding house run by Mrs. Barley (played by Mrs. Cake) to stay at. He also met a widow mare named Helen Buckson (Bon Bon) and her son Bobby (Featherweight).

While Helen and her boyfriend Trot Steeler (played by Thunderlane) went on a date, she reluctantly left her son with the Visitor. Bobby then showed “Mr. Wood Cutter” around Manehattan, eventually taking him to a graveyard.

“This place is strange,” the Visitor said, looking around the graves. “Why have you come here?”

“Well, Mr. Wood Cutter, I like to come here to visit my dad!” He knelt by a grave, bowing his head slightly.

The Visitor looked down at the grave. “The pony buried here is your father? I’m sorry, but… how did he die?”

“Oh, well, um, he died in the Great War when I was little,” Bobby replied, heaving a sigh. “A lot of the ponies in this graveyard died in wars.”

“Really!” the Visitor cried. “And ponies-- er, and we have many wars?”

“Gee whiz, Mister, of course! I hear adults talking about how there could be a war any day now! It scares me sometimes, but… well, shucks, there’s not much I can do about it, is there?”

“Hmm,” the Visitor said gravely.

“Just the same, Mr. Wood Cutter, I sure wish we lived in an Equestria where we didn’t have to worry about war so much!”

“I think that sounds like a fine idea, Bobby,” the Visitor said, smiling at him. “Hey, what do you say we go sneak a look at the spaceship in Manehattan Park?”

“Oh, I don’t know… I’d like to, but… well, just don’t tell my mom, okay?”

“It’s a promise!”

***

After seeing his spaceship with Bobby, the Visitor went to visit a great local scientist, Professor Barn Heart (played by the Doctor wearing a false gray mustache and a wiry gray wig). The Visitor instantly solved one of the complex theoretical equations on the blackboard of the aging professor, impressing him. After sending Bobby away temporarily, the Visitor revealed his identity to the professor.

“You’ve come all this way to visit us,” the Professor said. “But nopony seems to know why!”

“The truth is, I am a representative of a great number of beings from many different planets. And we have watched your planet with growing concern. As you advance your technology, the possibility of you one day taking to the stars means that you may one day pose a threat. I have a message for all the ponies of this planet and, I’m sorry to say, if it is ignored, then this planet will be destroyed.”

“Destroyed?! Oh my word!” the Professor cried. “Please, is there any way I can assist you?”

“I wished to deliver my message to the leaders of your world, but that now seems impossible. These politics of yours have divided you.”

“Perhaps, but… ah ha!” he exclaimed. “What if instead of the leaders of the world, I assembled the greatest scientists in Equestria? The academics, the chemists, the physicists, the engineers! Among ponies of science, the one great motivator is knowledge and truth! I have colleagues from other city states, and I’m certain I could gather them all here!”

“Your scientists?” The Visitor rubbed his chin. “Yes… yes, that’s a fine idea! They might be the best minds to hear the message and then tell it to your leaders. Very well, then. Tell them to come to my spaceship in two days’ time! I will deliver my message that evening.”

“Yes, but… ah, perhaps there is something you could do to convince the leaders of the seriousness of the situation? Some demonstration of your power?”

“Are you asking me to harm somepony?”

“No! Oh, good heavens, no!” the Professor exclaimed. “But perhaps you could show your power without harming or killing anypony?”

The Visitor smiled. “I see. Perhaps you are right, Professor Barn Heart. Very well. Tomorrow night, I will demonstrate what I can do.”

“How will we know that it’s you?” the Professor asked.

“Oh,” the Visitor chuckled, “you’ll know.”

***

The play continued. Bobby eventually saw the Visitor enter his ship under cover of night and told his mother Helen and Trot Steeler. Trot Steeler reported the Visitor to the military, which attempted to apprehend him as Helen found herself confronting the Visitor in her office building.

“Just who are you, and just what do you want?” Helen demanded, stomping her hoof.

“I am here because now that you know my secret, perhaps you may be able to help me!”

“Why should I help you? What are you planning?”

“I’m going to deliver a message to your planet’s great scientists,” the Visitor replied. “And I am going to give a demonstration of my power, so your leaders will know to take it seriously.”

“Demonstration? What demonstration?” Helen cried fearfully.

“You’ll see. In fact, you’ll see it in just a few moments.”

Out the window of the office, the night sky suddenly shifted, the moon moving away and the sun rapidly rising to the top of the sky.

“What?! But how!” Helen stammered. “The sun is up at this time of evening!”

“Yes. The unicorns in Canterlot normally control that, but they will be powerless to override what I’ve done. I have commanded the machines in my ship to hold the sun in the night sky, and it will stay there for half an hour. Then all ponies will know that what I say must be taken seriously.”

“I… how can I help?”

“Listen carefully to me. I will tell you my plan, and what must be done if I am hurt or captured again.”

***

After being betrayed by Trot Steeler, Helen broke up with him and went to aid the Visitor to help get him back to his ship in time for his speech, even as the various city-states panicked.

Unfortunately, the Visitor was attacked by the military and killed before he could reach his ship. With his dying words, he told Helen to go to the ship and relay some words to Gert.

However, when she arrived, she found that Gert had become active again, and the robot had used her powers to disintegrate two of the sentries standing guard (they were made to disappear with lights and trap doors, of course).

Helen watched this as Gert suddenly turned to face her, its eyes glowing bright red again. Helen backed away in fear and stumbled over her back hooves, falling to the ground and letting out a cry of terror as Gert approached her.

Twilight held her breath and watched as Turing, playing Gert, stomped across the stage, her burning red eyes staring down at Bon Bon’s character emotionlessly. Her steps were slow and deliberate, yet inexorable and powerful. Her heavy hoofsteps echoed throughout the theater. One could feel the tension as Helen shrank from the mechanical monster, the music from the orchestra pit building in intensity.

Gert’s eyes began to glow even more intensely.

Then Helen swallowed, steeling herself as she found her voice.

“Gert, listen to me,” she said to the robot. “I have a message.”

The robot had no reaction, only continuing to stare at her.

She took a deep breath and recited the words that the Visitor had told her to say.

“Gert… Cloptu berada nikto.”

The robot stopped, its red eyes dimming and becoming purple. It stooped and picked up Helen, taking her into the ship.

***

After mostly standing around for the whole play, the next few scenes showed Turing Test, as Gert, getting past the military guards easily, breaking the Visitor’s body out of the morgue by smashing right through a brick wall, and bringing him back to the ship, reviving him just in time to give his final message to the gathered scientists of Equestria (including a few ponies dressed not-too-convincingly as griffons).

“Scientists of this planet,” the Visitor said, standing in front of his spaceship before the gathered scientists, Gert standing behind him, “you will forgive me if I speak bluntly. The universe grows smaller every day. And the threat of aggression by any group, anywhere, can no longer be tolerated. There must be security for all, or there cannot be security for anyone. This does not mean giving up any freedom, except the freedom to act irresponsibly! We have an organization for the mutual protection of all planets and for the complete elimination of aggression. The test of any such system is, of course, the police force that supports it. For our police, we created a race of robots.”

He gestured back at Gert, who stood there, as always, silent and still as a statue.

“Their function,” the Visitor continued, “is to patrol the planets in spaceships like this one and preserve the peace. At the first sign of violence, they act immediately against the aggressor. The penalty for this is too terrible to risk. And so, we live in peace without weapons or armies. We do not pretend to have achieved perfection… but we have a system, and it works. I came here to give you these facts. It is no concern of ours how you run your own planet… but if you threaten to extend the violence and disunity you have on your planet to the other worlds,” and here, his expression turned more grave, and stoney, “this planet of yours will be reduced to a burned out cinder.”

The gathered scientists all chattered uneasily.

“So, I say,” the Visitor continued, “you can either join us and live in peace… or you can continue to fight amongst yourselves, divided, and face obliteration. We shall be waiting for your answer. The decision rests with you.”

With a final smile at Helen and Professor Barn Heart, the Visitor went back to the ship.

“Gert, beringa!” he said, causing the robot to follow him into the ship. With that and a final fanfare, the ship closed and so did the curtain.

There was a tense moment in the air as the play ended.

And then the audience erupted into wild applause, cheering, and stomping of hooves.

The curtain opened again, and the cast came out bit by bit for their curtain call. It began with the minor cast members, but then came the major players, including the Doctor and Bon Bon (who both got some loud cheers and whistles from Derpy and Lyra, respectively), followed by Turing Test and, lastly, Caramel.

When Turing trotted out and gave her final bow, Twilight wondered what would happen. Despite her friends’ reassurances, she thought perhaps some would still be disturbed, or that the younger fillies and colts would still be afraid.

But instead, the applause and cheers grew even greater in intensity, practically thunderous, and were second only to the applause Caramel got when he stepped out a moment later.

The cast gestured in unison to the orchestra pit, from which Noteworthy, Octavia, and Pinkie all stood and took a bow. They then gestured to the lighting crew, and finally Cheerilee stepped out, her eyes filled with tears as the audience rose to their hooves to applaud the play’s director.

When the applause finally died down, Cheerilee said, “Ah, well… oh my goodness, thank you everypony! We’re glad you enjoyed tonight’s performance of The Day the Sun Stood Still, and we hope you’ll come to the reception area on the bottom floor of the theater for refreshments and a chance to talk to the cast!”

Another cheer went up, and the audience filed out.

Twilight simply stood there, dumbfounded.

“You coming, Twilight?” Rainbow Dash asked, tapping her on the shoulder.

“Oh, yes, I…”

“Something wrong, Twilight?” Spike asked.

“No, I… wow, I just… I guess you were all right. I really didn’t have anything to worry about!”

She looked up at the box seat, but it was now empty. The Princesses had gone, as had the Royal Guards at the back of the theater.

She put that out of mind and followed the crowd out into the lobby, down the stairs, and to the bottom floor, where a table with punch and cookies and several other snacks was placed. The cast was already there, greeting the audience. Lyra was laughing and hugging Bon Bon, Derpy was teasing the Doctor by wearing his fake mustache, and it seemed just about every cast member was getting mobbed by members of the audience.

At last, Twilight spotted Turing Test. To her amazement, she saw she was surrounded by a large group of children, some of whom were begging her for an autograph.

“You were awesome Miss Robot!”

“You were so scary, Gert! My sister kept covering her eyes!”

“Nuh uh! She wasn’t that scary! She was cool!”

“Gert, can you turn your eyes red again?”

“My name is Turing Test,” she replied. “‘Gert’ is only the name of my character. However, I am capable of turning my eyes red. I simply adapted the function from my self-defense mode.”

With that, she turned her eyes red again, causing the fillies to squeal with delight and mock fear.

“Turing Test!” Twilight said, galloping over to her. “You did great!”

“Thank you, Twilight Sparkle,” she said, bowing slightly. “It was not difficult to act as a robot, though I did require assistance from Cheerilee on how to appear more intimidating. It seems that her advice was sound. Still, I am glad that you enjoyed my performance.”

“As did we,” said Luna, coming over to her, Celestia next to her.

Turing Test bowed to them. “Thank you for accepting my invitation.”

“Well, it’s not every day that we receive an invitation to a community theater performance like this,” Celestia said, “but it was refreshing after all the stuffy affairs in Canterlot. And while I’m not certain that I agree with all the playwright’s ideas, I did nonetheless enjoy the performance and the message about a need for harmony among all citizens of Equestria.”

“I did too,” Twilight said. “And what did you think, Princess Luna?”

“Twas-- um, it was most enjoyable, Twilight Sparkle,” she replied. “Forgive me, but I did some research on the play. It seems it was written at a time of widespread distrust between different regions of Equestria, and apparently called for greater unity under my sister,” she said, looking to Celestia with a smile, “and greater appreciation for scientists. A positive message, do you not agree?”

Celestia raised an eyebrow at that, giving Luna a sideways glance.

“In truth, I am not certain that the original playwright was correct to assume that a police force of robots would be ideal,” Turing said, looking up to them both. “Speaking as a robot, I often realize that I lack experience or intuition that organic ponies use to make sound judgments. Furthermore, the robot Gert lacked the ability to communicate or interact in a meaningful way, which seems a major weakness in one who would serve as a protector and fair enforcer of the law.”

Celestia blinked. “That’s… actually just what I was thinking, Turing Test.” She chuckled. “However, if a robot like you were to serve as a Royal Guard or a police officer… I might not object to that.”

Turing bowed again as Twilight broke into a beaming smile.

“I appreciate your esteem, Princess Celestia.”

Celestia and Luna both laughed but then winced as they each put a hoof to their forehead.

“Your Majesties,” said a Royal Guard, standing just behind them. “Are you well?”

“Yes,” Celestia said, rubbing her temple.

“It is strange, but we both developed a headache a few minutes ago. We are not certain of the cause--”

There was a sudden scream, and a mare ran down the stairs from the lobby.

“Everypony!” she shouted. “There’s… Princesses, please, come quick!”

Celestia, Luna, and Twilight all looked to each other and bolted for the stairs. The rest of Twilight’s friends were right behind them, and Turing Test and the rest of the crowd followed.

When they got to the lobby, they immediately saw what the screaming was about.

“No,” Celestia breathed, “it can’t be…”

“This… this was not my doing!” Luna cried. “Celestia?!”

“Not mine either, Luna,” Celestia said. The both of them stepped out, dumbfounded, as the crowd followed behind.

The sun shone above them. As if to confirm what they already knew, many ponies glanced at the clocktower, visible a short distance away.

“Great whickering stallions!” the Doctor exclaimed. “It’s… it’s just turned 10 PM!”

It was. It was ten in the evening, and yet the sun was high overhead, as though it were noon. Ponies were gathered in the streets, gasping and shielding their eyes as they stared up at the impossible sight.

“Luna!” Celestia cried. “We must set this right!”

Luna nodded, and they both took to the air, horns glowing.

A moment later, the sun rapidly set, the moon rising with equal speed to take its rightful place in the sky.

As night returned again, the crowd of ponies all cheered for their Princesses and breathed thankful sighs of relief.

“This...” Celestia hissed, gritting her teeth, “is this somepony’s idea of a joke?!”

“Who could have done this?” Luna asked, whispering to Celestia. “Perhaps… Discord?”

She shook her head. “Though he is capable, I doubt it. I’ve obtained a promise from Discord to never again interfere with the sun and moon, and I believe that he is sincere.”

Luna hesitated, then nodded. “Then, in that case… who?”

“Your Highnesses,” the Royal Guard said. “Shall we return to Canterlot?”

“Yes, we must return immediately,” Celestia said sternly. She turned to Twilight, who was looking up at her with wide, concerned eyes.

“Twilight, I apologize for cutting our visit short, but--”

“No, of course,” Twilight said, nodding to her. “Should I come with you?”

“That may be best,” Luna said. “Though I am not certain what the cause of this is, we may need your assistance as well.”

“I agree,” Celestia said. “Please, we must hurry.”

“Right!” Twilight said. She turned to her friends. “Girls, please try to keep Ponyville calm. Let them all know that things are fine for now and that the other Princesses and I are going to get to the bottom of this.”

“Right!” they all said in unison.

As they departed and the crowd began to disperse, Pinkie noticed Turing was watching them go with her ears drooping low.

“Aw, don’t worry, Rinny,” she said, “I’m sure everypony will still remember the play, even after this!”

“That is not my concern,” Turing replied. “I am more concerned about who may be responsible for this phenomenon. I suspect that they are the same ponies who are responsible for me.”

***

Umahara looked up at the huge machine before him and all the others gathered. The dome-shaped building housing the machine resembled an observatory, and even the machine itself bore a strong resemblance to a massive telescope the likes of which could be seen in universities around Equestria, especially the way it was angled up and aimed through a wide slit in the ceiling.

This machine, however, was no telescope. Its wide and cylindrical body terminated in a round, golden sphere with several slowly rotating rings around its circumference. As the machine powered down, the rings came to a stop. Through the slit in the ceiling, they could see as the sunlit sky returned to its normal nighttime darkness.

“Fillies and gentlecolts!” the operator called out. “Our test of the Sun Sphere is a success! And it looks like the Royals have already taken notice!”

The ponies all around Umahara erupted into cheers, including the mare sitting next to him.

“You should look happier, Umahara,” Blue Blazer said, leaning over to whisper to him. The both of them were seated along with many other high-ranking officials of their group in a makeshift observation area in a half-circle around the Sun Sphere.

“I know,” Umahara sighed, “I just…”

“After all, with this we are totally independent of Celestia and Luna’s powers over the sun and moon!”

“Yes, I… I guess I’m just nervous.” He furrowed his brow. “This is our first big, public move. This could bring more heat down on us. If we’re discovered now…”

“We won’t be,” Blue Blazer said, shaking a hoof dismissively. “We gave the Royal Guard and the Night Guard the slip, and there’s simply no possible way they’ll uncover our operation now.”

The slit in the ceiling rumbled loudly as its cover mechanically slid back into place. Ponies began to move about, scurrying along to different stations to read the data they’d collected off of printouts, or else return to whatever tasks they’d been busy with.

“You’re probably just tired,” Blue Blazer said, patting him on the back. “Maybe you should go to bed early. After all, we’ve both got our meeting with the President tomorrow morning.”

At the mention of the word ‘President,’ Umahara looked up at the observation area above the Sun Sphere. He could barely make out the silhouettes behind the glass, but the President was clearly among them.

“You’re right,” Umahara said, giving her a weak smile. “I guess seeing this project completed, and with how close we’re getting to our other projects’ releases… I’m just a little too tense.”

“Then like I said,” Blue Blazer said, taking to the air, “go get some shuteye, Umahara! Have sweet dreams about the bright future we’re building! It’s just around the corner!”

Umahara smiled and waved to her, bidding her goodnight as he walked down the hallway, back toward the main facility.

What Blue Blazer said was true. The projects they’d spent the last few months working tirelessly on were nearing completion. Some more testing, a few tweaks and improvements, and they could move forward.

Just the same, he wasn’t sure he agreed with the decision to move up the testing of the Sun Sphere to coincide with the night Celestia was supposedly seeing a production of The Day the Sun Stood Still. It felt somehow more confrontational, more personal than he would have liked.

As he rounded a corner, he saw a single glowing yellow light shining in his face from the shadows of the darkened hallway.

“Master Umahara…”

“Gah!” he shouted, rearing up on his hind legs in fear before clutching his chest. “Jeez, you scared me!”

“Apologies. I only wished to inform you that your team has reported an error in the latest production of spell card #26.”

He made a face, not just because of the bad news, but because of the grating, dissonant whisper of the voice of the figure before him, especially the way it dragged out each word a little too long.

“I understand,” he sighed. “I’ll handle it tomorrow.”

The figure stood silent.

“I said tomorrow,” he growled. “I’m too tired to do anything about it now.”

“It is unfortunate you require sleep, Master Umahara. I, however, do not.”

“Well, I do, and there’s plenty of time to fix the problem.” He narrowed his eyes. “So I’m going to bed.”

There was a pause. “Understood, Master Umahara.” The figure lowered its head. “Sleep well, and pleasant dreams. Please do not forget.”

“I won’t,” he snapped, sidestepping the thing before him. “See you tomorrow, 002.”

To be continued...

Author's Notes:

This was a really fun chapter to write, especially since I got a chance to reference my experienced acting in community theater and one of my favorite classic sci-fi movies.

References:

-Obviously, the biggest one is the prolonged homage to The Day the Earth Stood Still. The plot, the character names, and even Bon Bon's wardrobe are all drawn from the 1951 film. (And not the 2008 abomination.) Also, you have no idea how long I was waiting to make that stupid "Cloptu berada nikto" joke.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5NZXmq-E2tM

-The obvious reference to Shakespeare is one I'd bet most, if not all of you got.

-However, the mention of "The Tundra Book," is a bit more obscure. It's actually a reference to a reference! The original reference is "The Jungle Book," but I can't take credit for it. It's actually a joke from The Changeling of the Guard, one of my absolute favorite stories on the site. The joke appeared in the most recent chapter to come out as of this writing. Consider it a little nod to one of my favorite works.

See you next time, folks!

Broken, Part 1

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Twilight made her way to the front door of her castle the next morning. She turned the knob with her magic, walking inside, eager to get to her own bed. She’d spent the night in Canterlot, and though she had been offered a place to sleep, she hadn’t slept particularly well. She rubbed her eyes as she entered the cavernous main hall.

“Welcome home, Twilight Sparkle.”

Twilight gave a start and immediately ceased rubbing her eyes at the sound of Turing Test’s voice.

“My apologies, Twilight Sparkle. Did I startle you?” Turing asked. She was sitting right in front of the main doors, like a loyal dog waiting for its master to return.

She heaved a sigh and smiled weakly. “Just a little,” she said, shutting the door behind her. She grunted, stretching her back. “Sorry, I wasn’t really focused; you just caught me off guard.”

“You look tired, Twilight Sparkle. Spike the Dragon and I placed fresh sheets on your bed, should you wish to sleep.”

“Aw, that was nice of you both,” she said, giving Turing a smile. “That actually sounds really tempting. But, um, I actually flew here from Canterlot to try and refresh my thoughts. You know, a little exercise helps you think, sometimes?”

Turing shrugged. “Exercise has no effect on me. However, I have found that going for a walk to observe my surroundings sometimes provides me with insight. Is that what you mean?”

Twilight nodded. “Yeah, but my point is that now I’m a little sweaty, so I think I’ll take a bath first.”

Turing nodded. “I will draw a bath for you immediately, Twilight Sparkle. I am familiar with the optimum temperature that you prefer. I will also prepare some scented candles and the bubble bath solution you enjoy, provided Spike the Dragon has not used it all. Do you wish to select a book or perhaps some music? If it is the latter, I might suggest some new music that Octavia shared--”

“Okay, Turing, that’s enough!” Twilight said, bursting out laughing. “That’s very sweet, but you don’t have to dote on me like that.”

“My apologies, Twilight Sparkle,” she said, bowing her head slightly. “I simply wished to comfort you in case your visit to Canterlot was stressful. You and the other Princesses appeared to be very disturbed by the events of last night.” She paused. “I refer to the sun being raised in the evening, not to my play.”

Twilight rolled her eyes. “Obviously.”

They both made a turn and arrived at the bathroom, which contained a long, deep crystalline tub. Turing started the water for Twilight, scanning the water to monitor its temperature. Twilight decided to take Turing up on the offer of some music and also made herself some herbal tea while the tub filled.

At last, she entered the tub, letting out a long moan of contentment as she sank into the warm, foamy water right up to her chin.

“This is just what I needed, Turing. Thank you.” She closed her eyes, a smile on her face.

Then she noticed the telltale quiet hum of Turing’s electrical inner workings and opened one eye. The robot was still standing there.

“Turing? Um, you can go now.”

“Ah.” She glanced at the door as if she was going to leave, but then she stayed put, looking back to Twilight.

Twilight frowned. “Turing? What is it?”

She hesitated a moment. “Forgive me, Twilight Sparkle. I was very anxious when you did not return the previous evening. I waited for you.”

Twilight raised her head. “For how long?”

“Until seven minutes and thirty-six seconds ago.”

Twilight’s eyes widened. “Wait, you mean,” she exclaimed, sitting up in the tub, “that you waited up for me all night?!”

Turing nodded.

“Why?”

“I wished to be there for you the instant you came home. Spike the Dragon attempted to do the same, but he succumbed to fatigue and finally went to bed at 1:56 AM. I elected to wait at the door rather than enter sleep mode.”

Twilight gave her a sad smile. “Turing, you didn’t have to do that.”

“Correct,” she said. “However, I wanted to.”

“You’re very sweet, Turing,” Twilight said. “I’d hug you, but I’m wet now, and I don’t want you to rust.”

“I do not--”

“I know, I know, I’m joking,” she said, rolling her eyes again.

“I am glad that you appreciate my gesture. However,” she added, taking a step closer to Twilight before sitting down on the bathroom rug, “I am also curious to know what you and the other Princesses discovered.”

Twilight made a face at that. “I don’t really feel like talking about it right now, Turing.”

Turing’s ears drooped. “I see. I will be patient. I apologize for bothering you.” She got up and made for the door. She gave one last look over her shoulder.

“Ugh,” Twilight sighed. “Did you learn that look from the Crusaders?”

“Affirmative. Sweetie Belle in particular uses it to great effect with Rarity.”

Twilight sucked at her lips. “Fine,” she grunted, leaning back in the tub. “There’s not much to tell anyway…”

***

They were in a room Twilight had never been to, a room in the palace down twisting halls and behind a bookshelf. The Royal Guardsponies were already busy at work, but they bowed when Celestia, Luna, and Twilight passed by, going deeper into these secret chambers below the castle.

One of the guards gave Celestia a scroll, which she unfurled. A long list of names was displayed on it.

“Who are all these ponies?” Twilight asked, peering at them. She knew a lot of famous ponies in Canterlot, and she recognized a few of their names, but most were totally unknown to her.

“These,” Celestia said, “are the ponies who have knowledge of the spells used to raise the sun.”

There was a small commotion, and a Night Guard thestral came through, presenting a second scroll to Luna.

“And these,” Luna said, “are those who know how to raise the moon.”

Twilight gawked at them. “But… but that’s what you two are for!” she exclaimed. Then she paused, looking away. “I mean, that’s not all you do for Equestria, of course. B-but, I mean…”

Despite her serious expression, Celestia allowed herself a smile and she laid her hoof on Twilight’s shoulder. “It is our sacred responsibility,” she said, nodding, “but long ago, after Luna’s… after she left, I realized that it was a responsibility that was solely my own. Though I accepted it, I also realized the possibility that I might one day be unable to perform my duty. I could have become sick. Or injured. Or slain. In such a situation, there would be nopony else to raise the sun and moon in my absence. In the thousand years since that time, the spell has been taught to a group of unicorns who were charged with casting it should something happen to me. Generations of ponies have carried the knowledge of the spell, just in case the need arose.”

Luna nodded. “Before Celestia and I were crowned as Princesses, the spell was known widely among unicorns. But by the time we took the throne, society had changed. Unicorns had become more varied in their duties and occupations beyond the nobility, and the group charged with raising the sun and moon was far smaller than it had been in olden days. It was a taxing job, which was why it was fortunate - or perhaps fateful - that Starswirl the Bearded recognized the natural affinity Celestia and I had with Equestria’s satellites.”

Twilight nodded. She knew that raising the sun and moon had some powerful side effects. Some unicorns had aged prematurely (which was why Starswirl wore a gray beard even as a young pony) or had became ill or even lost their magic entirely. But with Celestia and Luna…

“So, you think one of these unicorns is responsible?” Twilight asked.

Celestia shook her head. “No, Twilight. No one unicorn could have done this. Only Luna and I have the power to raise the sun and moon by ourselves. It would take a massive amount of magical energy to perform the task.”

Twilight tapped her chin. “In that case, the possibilities are…” She paused, closing her eyes. “First, that a large number of unicorns on these lists did this. Second, that one of the unicorns shared the spell with others who weren’t authorized to know, and they did this. Third, that there’s somepony else able to do it. And finally, that somepony else figured out another way to raise the sun and moon without calling on a huge group of unicorns.”

Celestia smiled. “My thoughts exactly, Twilight,” she said. “Just as I expected from my best former student.”

Twilight beamed with pride but then swiftly grew more serious. “Still,” she said, rubbing her chin. “If that’s the case, then--”

“I object!” a familiar voice cried. “Slander! Lies! Undue prejudice!”

Celestia shut her eyes, rubbing her temple with one hoof. “Oh no…”

There was a flash of light, and the speaker appeared.

“I’m innocent!” Discord cried, draping his lion paw over his forehead dramatically. “Framed!” he added, transforming himself into a portrait of himself that was also draping his paw over his forehead. “To think that my dear friends would accuse me--”

“Discord,” Twilight said, narrowing her eyes.

“--of usurping control of the sun and moon!”

“Discord,” Celestia said, likewise narrowing her eyes.

“To think that my friends would mistrust me so easily after my sincere assurance that I would never again play with their heavenly bodies!”

“BE SILENT, THOU JABBERING BUFFOON!!” Luna bellowed.

They all froze, Discord included.

He put his mismatched hands on his hips. “Well, there’s no need to shout, Lulu.”

“Please do not call me that,” Luna said, wrinkling her nose.

“Well, in that case, I revoke your right to call me ‘Dissy!’” Discord said, folding his arms and sticking out his tongue.

“Um,” Twilight said, “I’m pretty sure none of us have ever called you that.”

“And now you never will!” he shouted, pointing an accusatory claw at them all. “To think that I, reformed as I am, would ever move the sun and moon--”

“Discord,” Celestia said gently, raising an eyebrow, “we didn’t think it was you.”

He blinked. “I’m sorry… what?”

“I said that we didn’t think you were responsible.”

He blinked several more times, standing there in silence. “Ah… well… I mean, don’t think I couldn’t have, if I’d actually wanted to!”

Celestia smirked. “Yes, we know.”

“Not that I did!”

“Of course not.”

“I… hm…” He rubbed his neck. “Well, then… I guess if I’m not needed…” He raised his fingers, preparing to snap them and teleport away in a flash.

“Discord, wait!” Twilight exclaimed, reaching out with one hoof. “Maybe you could help us out!”

He paused, staring down at her. “Help? Me?

“Sure!” Twilight said, smiling at him warmly. “You’re good at detecting magical disturbances, right? Maybe you could figure out who it was!”

He continued staring at her. “W-well,” he said, then broke into a smile. “That could be doable. Granted, raising the sun and moon isn’t exactly uncommon, but, if it’s a request from three out of four princesses,” he said, puffing out his chest, “then I suppose I could give it ‘the old college try.’” There was a flash, and he was suddenly wearing a letterman’s jacket.

“Great!” Twilight said. “Thanks for your help, Discord.”

“No, no, think nothing of it!” he said, raising his chin. “Just leave it to me! Should anypony besides the Royal Sisters do any mucking with Equestria’s circadian rhythm, I’ll know about it a second later!”

He snapped his fingers and was gone again in a final flash.

“Do you truly believe that he will be of help?” Luna asked, turning to Twilight.

Twilight nodded, giving her a confident smile. “He might actually be able to help us track down the source of the problem.” She paused, frowning. “Then again, that’s only if whoever did this does it again.”

“In the meantime,” Celestia said, “we should make a list of each of the unicorns with knowledge of the spell and document where they are and what they are doing. We’ll need to get the records from both the Royal and Night Guard to get an accurate picture of who might be responsible.”

Twilight nodded, looking again at the scrolls before her.

“Twilight.”

She looked up again at the sound of Celestia’s voice speaking her name. “Yes, Celestia?”

She glanced away for a moment before looking back to Twilight. “The last possibility you mentioned… of somepony else figuring out how to raise the sun and moon without involving a large group of unicorns?”

Twilight raised her head. “Yes?”

Celestia opened her mouth, then shut it, looking away before looking back to Twilight and opening her mouth again to speak.

“Do you believe that this could have been done utilizing technological means?”

Twilight considered that possibility. “I don’t know, but… well, it’s possible.” She nodded decisively. “Yes. After seeing those ponies using spell cards to cast complex spells, it’s possible that somepony could have figured out how to use a machine to cast the spell to raise the sun and moon.”

Celestia nodded. “If that’s the case, then this might be the work of the group that created Turing Test,” she said, her expression darkening. “If so, I will take this action not only as a personal insult but as an act of terrorism and war.”

Twilight swallowed. “W-war?”

“The ponies who did this did so for a reason. And after the play we attended… I cannot believe this is a mere coincidence.”

“Nor can I,” Luna said, gritting her teeth. “Celestia once suggested the possibility of machines replacing us. At the time, I considered it a mere fantasy… but it seems that such a thing may truly exist. If that is the case, then we must not waste any time in finding these traitors before they become emboldened by their victory.”

Twilight looked from one sister to the other. She drew herself up. “What can I do to help?”

***

“...In the end,” Twilight said, lying back in the tub, “they had me look over the suspects they had for who might have built you, and also who might have moved the sun last night. They thought that maybe I’d catch something they’d missed. Unfortunately,” she said, heaving a sigh, “I didn’t. I worked on that with the Royal Guard for hours while Celestia and Luna worked on getting more information about the unicorns who knew the spells to raise the sun and moon. Unfortunately, I didn’t have any more luck than they did. All I did was tire myself out.” She yawned, sinking deeper into the water.

“I see,” Turing said. “Then it is possible that my creators are responsible.”

“There’s no proof yet,” Twilight said, “but if I were a betting mare… I’d put all the bits I had on them being responsible.”

Turing was quiet for a moment. As Twilight lapsed into silence, Turing spoke up one more time: “Twilight Sparkle… do the other princesses believe I had something to do with this incident?”

Twilight sat up, glancing over at Turing. “No,” she said, offering her a smile. “Turing, none of us think you’re responsible. The fact that this happened on the night of your play is either a coincidence or the result of somepony knowing Celestia and Luna would be there. But that could be just about anypony in Canterlot with how word gets around.”

Turing nodded. “I see. I am glad to know I have your trust, but I am sorry that you were unable to confirm the cause of the incident.” She placed a towel on the floor by the bathtub. “I will take my leave and allow you to continue your bath in peace, Twilight Sparkle. If there is nothing else, then I will return to my room and enter sleep mode to conserve my remaining power. Please inform me if you require my services later today.”

Twilight sank up to her muzzle in the water. “Mm hmm,” she hummed, burbling under the layer of bubbles.

With that, Turing returned to her room, at last leaving Twilight to enjoy her bath in peace.

***

“Turing?”

The sound of her name caused her to exit sleep mode. Her eyes reactivated, and she saw Spike standing before her. She stood to greet him.

“Hello, Spike the Dragon. I see you are awake.”

He nodded. “Uh huh. And Twilight’s back too!”

“I am aware. I greeted her when she returned this morning. Is she awake?”

“No, she’s sleeping in for once.” He chuckled. “Not every day I get to say that!”

“Did you wish to speak with her?” Her ears shifted as a thought occurred to her. “Ah. Did you wish for me to wake you earlier so that you could greet her?”

He shrugged. “As long as one of us was around, I guess it’s fine. But, uh, listen,” he said, leaning in as he glanced over his shoulder. “I was wondering if you could help me out with something.”

“I would be glad to,” she replied.

“Great!” He smiled a toothy grin. “Twilight’s probably pretty stressed out after last night if she decided to sleep all morning. So, I thought we could do something nice for her! Maybe make one of her favorite meals and take care of some things she needs done. That kind of thing.”

“That sounds like an excellent idea, Spike the Dragon. How may I assist you?”

He held up a small piece of paper with several items on it. “If I give you some bits, could you go buy some of these things? You should be able to find them all in town.”

“Affirmative. I will procure these items.”

“Thanks a lot, Turing!” he said, giving her a small hug, which she returned. “I’m gonna pick up some other things. Working together, we should get them all in no time!”

He offered her the list, but she shook her head.

“I have already scanned the list and memorized its contents. I will not need the list.” They both stepped out of her room and to the front door, picking up her saddlebags and a small satchel for him.

“Meet me back here when you’re done, okay?”

“Acknowledged,” she said, and set out on her quest.

***

It was sunny and warm that day, and as Turing looked up, there was hardly a cloud in the sky. In fact, there was just one.

Then a rainbow-colored streak crossed the sky and blasted through the cloud, obliterating it.

“Hello, Rainbow Dash,” Turing said, waving a hoof.

Though she would have sworn that Rainbow was out of earshot, the pegasus suddenly reversed direction and landed right next to her.

“Hey, Tee!” she said, holding out her foreleg for a hoofbump, which Turing gave. “Nice job with that play yesterday! A little preachy if you ask me, but you were awesome!”

“Was I?” Turing asked, tilting her head. “I had no dialogue.”

“Yeah, but when I go to see a play or a movie about aliens, I expect some explosions or some scary monsters or something. That play didn’t have much of that, but you were the closest thing to a scary monster in the whole thing! If I didn’t know you - and if I wasn’t the bravest pony in town - I’d have been totally scared!”

“I see.” She tapped her chin. “My apologies, Rainbow Dash, but I am running errands to procure items for a meal for Twilight Sparkle.”

“Oh yeah? Well, don’t let me keep you.” She grinned and gave a quick mock salute as she prepared to fly away again.

“You misunderstand. I was wondering if you could help me find some of the items.”

“Oh, sure!” she said, grinning. “What’s on the menu?”

Turing listed the items she was after as Rainbow listened.

“Okay, well, the Apples are selling apples - yeah, obviously - in the market. Uh… oh, I think Fluttershy just got a fresh batch of eggs this morning! I’ll let her know you want some, so stop by there later. Those mushrooms, I’m not sure I’ve ever heard of them. Maybe somepony in the market is selling ‘em. Anything else?”

Turing shook her head. “Thank you for your assistance, Rainbow Dash. You have been very helpful.”

“No problem, Tee!” she said. She crouched down and sprang into the air, taking off in an instant…

...and crashing into Derpy, who was passing by, causing them both to tumble to the ground. The letters in the gray pegasus’s bag all spilled out and fluttered to the ground in a veritable mailstrom.

“Geez!” Rainbow said, rubbing her head.

“Ah!” Derpy cried, focusing her skewed eyes on Rainbow. “Oh, sorry, Rainbow Dash. I just… oh no, my letters!”

She scrambled to pick them up. “Oh no, oh no, it took forever to sort them! If I have to do it again, I’ll be late! And if I’m late, everypony’s gonna be sooo mad!”

“Hello Derpy,” Turing said, coming over. “There is no need to worry.”

“What?” Derpy said, looking up from her letters and noticing Turing standing there. “Oh, hello Turing Test! And what do you mean?”

“One moment. Engaging U-Mode.” Turing’s horn slid into place, and the glow of her magic engulfed the mass of letters. “I saw how the letters fell and will now trace them back to their original positions. This will enable me to restore them to their original order.”

Derpy and Rainbow Dash watched as the letters rapidly sorted themselves into orderly stacks which Turing then deposited back into Derpy’s mailbag.

“Mail sorting complete. They are back in their original order.”

“Oh my gosh!” Derpy cried, breaking into a beaming smile. She leaped forward, embracing Turing. “Thanks a lot, Turing! You really saved me a lot of trouble!”

“Yeah, nice going, Tee!” Rainbow said, giving an approving nod. Then she looked to Derpy, blushing slightly. “Uh, sorry about the crash, Derpy.”

“No worries, Rainbow Dash!” she said, smiling sweetly. “Well, I better get going. These letters aren’t going to deliver themselves!” She took off again, with Rainbow Dash leaving right after her.

Turing bid them both goodbye as she headed into town.

***

She made her way through town, stopping at stalls to pick up various fruits and vegetables and spices. Yet, as she went, something strange occurred.

Ponies waved at her.

Ever since the day Rarity had helped her get a new paint job - ill-fated though it may have been - there had been at least a few who greeted her warmly, but so many others either ignored her, avoided her, or even expressed surprise or fear upon seeing her. Even after so many months, going through town had not always been a particularly pleasant experience.

But now, ponies were waving. Smiling. Complimenting her on her play.

“Look out, everypony!” a voice rang out. “It’s the killer robot from outer space!”

She glanced to see a small group of fillies and colts whom she recognized from the play. They were all pointing at her and smiling mischievously. She tilted her head at them.

They all looked to each other, then took a breath and, in unison, shouted “Cloptu berada nikto!”

Turing paused a moment but then realized what was happening. She obliged and turned off her eyes, slumping, “defeated” by their little incantation.

They all laughed, and Turing raised her head again, reactivating her eyes.

“You were great in the play, Gert!” one of the fillies shouted.

“My name is not Gert. It is Turing Test.”

The filly put her ears back. “Um… but Gert is easier to remember.”

Turing tapped her chin. “If you remember that I am not really like the robot in the play, then I will allow you to call me Gert.”

They all cheered and waved goodbye as she went on with her errands.

Through the rest of the day, she likewise received numerous warm greetings. True, some of the vendors didn’t know her very well, but the citizens of Ponyville all greeted her as though she were any other pony.

She received some sweet dinner rolls from Sugarcube Corner, where Pinkie and the Cakes even gave her an extra one for Spike that was glazed with gemstone dust (Turing kept that one separate from the ones for Twilight).

She saw the Doctor, who was selling some inventions of his in town and offered her an “egg timer” which he promised could slightly turn back time and make an older egg taste fresh again. Even though she was already going to buy some very fresh eggs from Fluttershy, she obliged and bought it, which made the Doctor even happier than she would have expected.

She also ran into Lyra and Bon Bon, who gave Turing some caramels on the house to give to Twilight and Spike as well (though Turing wasn’t sure why they said they were “on the house” when they were clearly in a small plastic bag).

Luckily, Turing spotted Fluttershy at the market as well. And to her pleasant surprise, Fluttershy had already set aside a small basket of eggs, neatly wrapped to protect them from cracking. A few of the birds and other critters that had tagged along with her chirped and tweeted goodbye when Turing left, with one of the birds perching on her head as she walked away until Fluttershy frantically called it back.

Several other vendors offered her discounts and told her they loved the play. Not wanting to say no, she soon had more groceries than she needed, including some carrots from Golden Harvest and grapes from Berry Punch.

Later she found Applejack and Big Mac selling the apples she needed from their cart. Rarity was there too, just making small talk with them. They discussed the harvest of winter rye and Applejack’s health, which she assured Turing was just fine. Rarity discussed her designs for more dresses for the Grand Galloping Gala next season as well as her plans for a new shop in Canterlot, if she could only find the right location. Inevitably, the conversation turned to the bulging saddlebags that Turing carried.

“So, yer makin’ somethin’ fancy fer Twilight?” Applejack asked. “Sounds good. Lemme know if y’all have any leftovers.”

“I wouldn’t mind a taste too,” Rarity said. “Um, provided that not all of Spikey Wikey’s cooking turns out like that dreadful pie he made last year,” she quickly added.

“I will,” Turing assured them both. “However, I have not been able to locate a particular ingredient: we are making a dish of fried morel mushrooms, yet no ponies seem to have them.”

Applejack’s expression changed. “Uh… maybe I’ll pass on the leftovers, then.” She gulped. “I think it’ll be a while before I trust any more mushrooms.”

Big Mac nodded solemnly. “Eeyup!” he said.

“Well, you’re missing out,” Rarity said, wagging her hoof. “Morel mushrooms are tender and flavorful and simply divine when prepared properly. Still, you say that you can’t find any in the market today?”

“Correct. I have found many other kinds of edible mushrooms, including portobello, shiitake, and white button, yet no vendors have any morels despite assuring me that it is the correct season to buy them.”

“Well, if no shops or vendors sell them,” Rarity said, rubbing her chin, “you could always ask Zecora. If anypony is likely to gather wild mushrooms in Ponyville, it’s her.”

“Good thinkin’, Rarity!” Applejack said. “Though, are ya sure ya really want ‘em badly enough to go to the Everfree Forest?”

Turing considered the question for a moment, then nodded. “Affirmative. I wish to make Twilight Sparkle happy. It may be inconvenient, but the risk to myself is minimal. Thank you both for your advice.”

“Well, good luck, then,” Applejack said, waving goodbye to her as she left. “Tell Spike, Twilight, an’ Zecora I said hi!”

“Likewise!” Rarity added.

“Eeyup!” Big Mac chimed in.

***

To Turing’s relief, Zecora in fact had just picked several morel mushrooms that morning and was perfectly willing to part with a hefty supply, which Turing packed into her now-empty saddlebags. (She’d stopped by the castle to drop off her other groceries, leaving a note to Spike that she would return later.)

Now she walked through the Everfree, following the path back toward Ponyville. In the quiet forest, the sound of the servos in her legs whirring echoed through the trees, accompanied by the wind rustling through the leaves and the occasional call of an unseen bird. In that quiet, and with her job nearly finished, her thoughts turned back to her experience in town that day.

Very few ponies reacted with fear or mistrust. Many ponies call me by my name now, rather than ‘Twilight’s robot’ or simply ‘the robot.’ Many of my acquaintances offered assistance or gifts when neither were requested.

She looked up at the sky through the trees as she continued walking, considering what all that could mean.

Is this a sign that I have become more familiar in Ponyville? Is it possible that they now accept me? She paused as another thought occurred to her. Is it possible that they consider me their peer? Their… friend?

A wave of excitement washed over her as she considered the possibility.

Though I have known for some time that I could befriend other ponies, I had not expected that I would have so many friends. But is it true? Do they now care for me as one of their own?

She was brought out of these thoughts by a rustling in the underbrush near the path. With only the slightest sound, something slinked out of the shadows, baring its teeth. She was surprised that something so large could move so quietly as to deceive even her ears.

She’d never seen such a creature before. It was covered with light brown fur, and it resembled a lion, with its legs, body, face, and shockingly red mane. However, it had two short horns curving up just above its ears, a pair of wide, leathery, batlike wings, and a twitching tail like that of a scorpion. It was a manticore, though Turing didn’t know that.

“Hello,” she said, watching the manticore carefully. Though she realized that the creature could be aggressive, she didn’t see how it could harm her. Besides that, Fluttershy had taught her to be calm and patient with animals. Perhaps the creature was just curious.

A deep, reverberating growl emanated from the manticore’s throat, but it made no move to attack as it fixed its gaze on her and began to circle her, its nostrils flaring as it took in her scent.

“You may be confused by my appearance, as I resemble a pony, yet my scent is not that of an organic creature. I assure you that I am very inedible. You may ask some timberwolves, a hydra, and a frog if you do not believe me.”

The creature came closer and licked her cheek, immediately making a face afterwards.

“I warned you,” she said.

The manticore sniffed at her saddlebags.

“Ah. Perhaps you smell these mushrooms?” She hesitated. They were for Twilight Sparkle, after all. Still, there were enough to share, and it wasn’t as though she could eat them herself.

She scooped out a morel mushroom and held it up to the manticore, which flinched at her sudden movement. It hesitated, sniffing the mushroom once before taking it from her hoof in its jaws and devouring it in a few quick bites. She heard its stomach growling.

“Perhaps you would like more? I am able to spare a few--”

The manticore suddenly seized her saddlebags in one quick motion before leaping into the air, taking off with powerful beats from its leathery wings.

“Ah. You have robbed me.” She watched it sail out over the trees, quickly vanishing from sight. She considered going back to request more mushrooms from Zecora… but then she decided that those mushrooms were hers, and she’d already spent good bits on them. She would not let the manticore take them from her.

“Engaging P-Mode.” She spread her metallic wings and her jets came to life. A few moments later, she took off in the direction of the manticore.

She did not spot it immediately, but switching to her thermal vision allowed her to trace the heat signature of the beast as it had skimmed and even dipped below the treeline. She had to slow her flying to make certain she was following the trail accurately. The manticore hadn’t looked particularly nimble, but the trail twisted, turned, bobbed, and weaved for a few kilometers until she at last saw that it had gone into a deep ravine that cut through the Everfree Forest.

She slowed her jets and descended down the side. She heard the guttural growling of the creature, but also several other sounds she didn’t recognize. As she gradually descended, she spotted an alcove in the rocky cliffside.

The manticore was there, and Turing’s saddlebags had been upended, the mushrooms dumped onto the ground at the manticore’s paws. But there were other things moving behind the manticore, and one just behind the small pile. She came closer, landing on the rim of the alcove, to see what it was.

Then the thing behind the pile poked its little head out. Though it lacked a mane and was several times smaller than the manticore that had stolen her mushrooms, she could see in an instant that it was a baby. It clutched a mushroom in its tiny paws and fell backwards as it munched on it.

“I see,” Turing said quietly, looking from the cub to the parent. “You acquired my mushrooms to feed your children.”

The manticore made not a sound but continued watching her, its eyes only occasionally glancing down at its cub playing at its feet and the others hiding just behind it, all yowling a juvenile version of their parent’s roar. The manticore’s nostrils were flaring in and out, and she could hear its heart beating rapidly.

She wondered what this meant, and then realized that the manticore was tense, resting on its paws, and ready to spring forward in an instant to protect its youth, but it was not striking at her.

It was afraid of her.

She lowered her ears and took a step back. “My apologies. I will not harm you. I will allow you to keep these mushrooms to feed your family. That is more important than the use I had for them. I am certain Twilight Sparkle will still be satisfied with her meal.”

She turned, revving up her jets again, preparing to take off and leave the manticore family in peace.

And then, just as she was about to leave, there was a sound, a flash of color, and she turned her head as the beast that was suddenly there roared at her and tackled her with all its might, knocking her from her hooves.

Ah, she realized, the other parent.

She was falling. The bottom of the ravine was far below her. Her jets were still coming up to speed, but she was spiraling downward, out of control. As she tried to calculate her next course of action, she slammed into the side of the rock wall, jostling her vision and sending a loud clang echoing through the deep ravine. There was a loud hissing sound as well, and she was unable to receive feedback from her right wing. She caught a glimpse of something shiny falling with her.

Her wing.

Her wing had snapped off. Her right jets were spraying air uselessly as she plummeted like a stone.

She bounced off the rock wall again, shattering stone that tumbled down with her in a torrent. She crashed and tumbled again and again, deeper and deeper before she slammed into the ground like a meteor and everything went black.

***

Warning: system shut down due to an unknown error. Rebooting…

Data loaded, systems turned back on, and at last her eyes reactivated.

Reboot complete. Warning: multiple errors detected.

She looked around. She was at the bottom of the ravine. She looked up and saw the blue sky overhead. Judging from the direction of the light shining at the top, it had only been a few minutes since she’d fallen. The impact must have disrupted her systems enough to cause her to malfunction, which explained the reboot.

She turned her head and saw that she was lying facedown on a flat slab of stone. Fresh dust and a pile of rubble had buried her lower body. There were scrubby plants around her, and she spied small lizards darting between the moss-covered stones and a tiny stream that gently flowed through the ravine.

I must return home before Spike the Dragon and Twilight Sparkle worry about me, she told herself. She placed her front hooves on the rock, trying to push herself up.

She didn’t budge. Something was wrong. Not only that, when she had pushed her hooves to the stone, she hadn’t heard the slightest scraping of metal on rock.

Diagnosing problem… error detected in auditory system. No auditory input received.

She looked around and spotted a glint of metal among the stones. Focusing her eyes on it, she saw what it was.

Her ear.

She turned her head, moving the hinges where her ears should be. They moved too easily, which meant they were unweighted, which meant both her ears had been snapped off.

“I am... deaf.”

She detected a cognitive loop. A feeling.

She ignored it, focusing on her predicament instead. She again pushed with her front hooves, ordering her back hooves to move as well. But again, the stones on top of her held her down.

Diagnosing problem… right and left hind legs are unresponsive. Cause of problem is unknown.

The feeling intensified.

“Engaging E-Mode.”

Surely that would do it. Her forelegs were functional, after all, and with enough power, she could extricate herself from the stones and drag herself back to Ponyville, where they could repair her and--

Error in mode switch detected. E-Mode failed.

She paused. She tried again.

Error in mode switch detected. E-Mode failed.

The same message. She could not fly. She could not hear. She could not move.

She was trapped.

She was broken.

She was trapped at the bottom of a ravine, several kilometers from the main trail through the Everfree Forest. Nopony knew where she was.

And it was then that she realized that her battery power was at 18%.

That feeling again. That awful, terrible feeling. The possibility that could not be denied, no matter how much she wished to do so…

The possibility that she was lost, that she would never be found, and that she would never see her friends again.

The feeling consumed her, obliterating all but that one thought. That feeling.

Fear.

“Help?” she called feebly, looking up at the sky from the bottom of the deep chasm.

“Help!” she called again, unable to hear her own voice or tell how well it carried or how far.

“Anypony! If somepony can hear me, please, do not leave me here!” Her shouts became increasingly plaintive screams as the feeling gripped her. She shouted again and again for help, as the minutes wore on and turned to hours.

The sun began to set, and yet her cries for help went unheeded. As the darkness began to close in, she cried out once more, and it was a shrill sound, a distorted shriek as she nearly blew out her speaker, calling one last time in terror for someone to save her.

Silence, and nothing more.

She laid her head on the stone in despair. “Twilight Sparkle,” she whimpered softly, “please… please come find me…”

To be continued…

Broken, Part 2

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The sound of wind gave a low, moaning howl through the ravine. Deaf to it, far below, Turing Test lay there, trapped beneath the rubble. To her, the ravine was utterly silent, and so, she realized, she wouldn’t be able to hear any rescuers calling for her. She could only shout and hope that somepony heard her.

She considered that even as her fear lingered.

Assessing situation: Battery power is at 18%. By conserving power, I will be able to remain operational for 12 hours and 57.6 minutes. During that time, it is likely that I will be missed and others will attempt to locate me. It is now approximately 3:38 pm, meaning that I will be responsive until early tomorrow morning. After that, it is still possible that I may be located through other means, though I will no longer have the power to call for assistance. Therefore, I should focus on two strategies to maximize the likelihood of rescue. First, I will reduce power to all unnecessary systems. Second, I will put a message on a loop, angling the direction of my calls to maximize audible range.

Satisfied, she turned her head up slightly, resting it on the rock to avoid having to hold it up under her own power. According to her calculations, she could achieve the best echo and audible range by aiming her voice at a particular wall of rock 72 degrees up and 27 degrees to her right. She then began the message:

Satisfied, she set the message to repeat and shut down any unneeded systems. Since her ears weren’t attached anyway, she disabled her auditory systems. Since she wouldn’t really need more than normal vision, she disabled all but her basic visual functions, even setting them low enough that she could just see to the top of the ravine.

The only things really consuming power now were her eyes, her voice... and her cognitive function.

She considered that. She could conceivably go into very low power mode, essentially sleep mode, and only leave her voice and eyes running. Should a pony enter her field of vision, she could reactivate fully. That might conserve even more power, enabling her to call for help for even longer, though how much longer was difficult to estimate; she’d never done something like this before, after all.

She was about to enact that plan when a thought occurred to her:

If I deactivate now, I will be functionally unconscious. If I deactivate now and am never found… then this will be my last moment of conscious existence. I will never have another thought or emotion or experience. It will be as though I am…

The feeling intensified. She knew the logical thing to do would be to shut off her cognitive function, yet doing so filled her with such terror of it being the last thing she would ever do that she simply couldn’t.

She continued to stare up at the sliver of sky at the top of the ravine without entering sleep mode. She could not sleep knowing she might never awaken.

***

There was a knock at the door of the cavernous castle library later that afternoon.

“Come in!” Twilight called as she looked up from her book. She smiled when she saw Spike walk into the room.

“Uh, hey, Twilight?” he began, glancing over his shoulder. “I think I need to talk to you.”

Twilight raised an eyebrow, frowning at Spike’s obviously nervous demeanor. “What is it, Spike? Did something happen?”

“Maybe,” he said slowly. He heaved a sigh and looked her in the eye. “Listen, um… I knew you were really tired and stressed out this morning, so I talked to Turing Test and we decided to fix you a nice dinner to help you relax.”

Twilight broke into a beaming smile. “Aww, that’s so sweet of you both!” Before Spike could continue, she swept him up in her magic, hugging him. “I can’t wait! What are we having?”

Spike squirmed out of her grasp. “No, no, Twilight, listen!” he said, balling his claws into fists. “The point is that I sent Turing to get a lot of the ingredients, but she couldn’t find any morel mushrooms, so she went to visit Zecora.”

Twilight frowned. “Go on,” she said.

Spike swallowed. “She left a few hours ago. I really thought she’d be back by now.”

“A few hours?!” Twilight exclaimed, leaping to her hooves, wings spread. “And you’re just telling me now?!”

“Hey, I thought maybe she and Zecora went out to find some, so I gave her a little leeway!” he shot back. “It’s not like she can’t handle herself!”

Twilight used Cadance’s breathing technique, placing a hoof to her chest as she inhaled before giving a wave and exhaling.

“All right. You’re right, Spike, there was no need to be worried before. There might not be now. But just the same, I think we should try to find Turing Test.” She trotted for the door and went to the nearest balcony. She gave a gesture of her head, and after Spike climbed onto her back she spread her wings and took off.

“Where should we look?” he said, raising his voice over the sound of wind as they flew toward the Everfree Forest.

“We’ll follow the main path through the forest,” Twilight replied. “If we don’t find her, we’ll head for Zecora’s!”

“Sounds like a good plan!” Spike said, giving her a smile and a thumbs up. “I bet we’ll find her in no time!”

Twilight smiled and gave him a nod. To herself, she said, I sure hope you’re right, Spike.

***

The sky at the top of the ravine was taking on a different hue, and the shadows had shifted and deepened. It was just after 5 o’clock, which meant that soon it would be evening, and then night.

It may become more difficult for my friends to locate me in the dark, as they lack night vision.

Turing tried to ignore that fact. Organic ponies were very good at ignoring things that were inconvenient or depressing, but she found it impossible to ignore something that she was fully conscious of. Still, that didn’t mean that it was hopeless after dark.

Twilight Sparkle and Rarity know illumination spells. My other friends may utilize flashlights. Furthermore, even if my power depletes, it is probable that they will continue to search for me tomorrow, even though I will no longer be able to call for help. It seems likely that I will be found at some point.

Her fear began to subside.

But then, a question arose: How much time will pass before I am found? A day is possible. A week is possible. Will they continue to search for me for a month? A year?

She considered this as a cloud slowly passed overhead.

As I am currently exposed to the elements, my body may become damaged and inoperable beyond repair. I am uncertain what the upper limit is before such an event occurs. If I am not discovered soon, it is possible that I may still be discovered by chance at a later date and still be repaired. Perhaps even many years from now…

***

“C’mon, Winona!” Applejack said, galloping after her small dog. “Go find ‘er! Sniff ‘er out!”

Twilight and her other friends all followed Applejack as they trailed Winona. The little dog barked eagerly as she made her way through the twisting, turning path of the Everfree Forest. Bordered on either side by the thick trees, their branches covered in low-hanging Spanish moss, the place always struck Twilight with how deep and endless it seemed. Without knowledge of where they were going, one could wander around for days without getting any closer to an exit.

Twilight shook her head, putting the thought out of mind. Turing was a robot and wasn’t susceptible to getting her directions confused, unlike a normal pony.

Of course, that just meant that, whatever had happened, it wasn’t merely a case of a poor sense of direction. Which meant something worse might have happened.

She might have been attacked. Or there might have been an accident. Or… or perhaps her creators had followed her and ambushed her in the woods, and they’d already taken her away--

There was a tap on her shoulder. She looked to her right and then up to see Rainbow Dash flying just above her. She wore a warm, comforting smile.

“Hey, I see you making those worried faces, Twilight,” she said, raising an eyebrow at her. “Look, just relax. Tee’s one tough pony, and even if she’s in a jam, Winona will find her, no problem!”

“Darn right!” Applejack said, looking over her shoulder. “Once she got a good smell o’ that metal polish, she took right off after ‘er. We’ll find Turing in no time!”

Twilight smiled. “Right. You’re right, I’m sure,” she said, holding her head up a little higher.

When Twilight and Spike had met Zecora, she’d told them that she had indeed seen Turing and sold her some mushrooms, but that had been hours ago. She’d promised to search for her while Twilight enlisted the help of her friends, and Spike had offered to stay behind in case she came back to the castle on her own. A quick sniff of Turing’s metal polish was all Winona needed to pick up Turing’s trail, and considering how well she’d tracked Applejack not so long ago, it seemed like she’d have no problem locating Turing Test.

Suddenly Applejack skidded to a halt, and the others nearly collided with her.

“Oh, what is it, Applejack?” Fluttershy asked. “Did Winona find something?”

“Maybe,” Applejack replied, pointing her hoof at Winona.

The dog had stopped in the middle of the path and had put her nose to the ground. She circled the area several times before looking over to Applejack and giving a few short barks.

“What is it, girl? Ya find somethin’?”

Winona whined and sat down.

“Hmm,” Applejack said, rubbing her chin. “That’s odd.”

“Oh dear,” Rarity said, frowning as she came alongside Applejack. “Don’t tell me that she’s lost the scent!”

“Don’t think so… well, not exactly. Seems like the trail just up and ends here.” She tapped her head, scrunching her eyes shut as she thought of a reasonable explanation. “Don’t suppose she could’ve teleported, Twi?”

Twilight shook her head. “Turing Test has been improving her magic a lot. She’s good with shield spells and can levitate some heavier objects, but she’s a long way from mastering teleportation.”

“Well, I ain’t sure why else the trail would just stop like this. It’s like she disappeared into thin air!”

“Oh my gosh!” Pinkie shrieked, hooves flying to the sides of her face as her eyes bulged. All the others looked to her, awaiting her sudden revelation.

“Rinny was abducted by aliens!”

They all heaved a collective sigh.

“Pinkie, really?” Rarity asked, giving her a tired look. “Aliens? Don’t be ridiculous.”

“Hey, until Rinny showed up, we thought mechanical ponies were ridiculous!” Pinkie said, crossing her forelegs indignantly.

“Be that as it may,” Rarity said, “we must stick to more realistic possibilities. Now, if we could just think of why Winona can no longer track Turing Test, then we--”

“Maybe she flew.”

They all looked to Rainbow Dash as soon as she spoke.

“What?” she asked. “I mean, you all remember she can fly, right?”

“O-oh, right,” Twilight said, blushing slightly. “I… forgot, actually.” She cleared her throat. “Okay, Rainbow, why don’t you do a search from the air while the rest of us look around for clues. Fluttershy, talk to Winona in case she can figure something else out that we’re not seeing. Or, uh, smelling. Whatever.”

Their jobs designated, they set to it.

Rainbow soared high above the forest. Nothing but trees in all directions, save for a distant mountain range to the east, the tip of Mount Canter in the north, and the top of Twilight’s castle back in Ponyville to the west. She scanned the area for any signs of her robotic friend. She saw nothing, so she took a deep breath and shouted as loud as she could:

“TEEEEEEE!!”

The sound echoed out over the Everfree. Birds flew up at the sound of her voice. But after several moments with no response, she took another breath and tried again.

“TURING TE~EST! WHERE ARE YOU?!”

Another few moments went by. There was no response. She sighed heavily, her ears drooping, and she went back down, landing back where her friends were searching the area.

“Any luck?” Twilight asked.

Rainbow lowered her head. “No,” she said quietly.

Twilight patted her on the shoulder. “It’s okay,” she said. “I’m sure she’ll turn up.”

“Ooh, ooh, I think I found something!” Pinkie exclaimed, bounding out of the woods with something in her hoof.

“Oh thank goodness!” Rarity said, emerging from the woods as well, brushing leaves from her mane and shaking the dirt from her hooves. “I was afraid we’d have to spend hours tromping around this horrid place.”

“What did you find, Pinkie?” Twilight asked, going over to her.

“Ta da!” Pinkie said, and held up the object. There, plain to see, was a morel mushroom.

“You just found that? It was just lying on the ground?”

“Yep!” Pinkie said, nodding. “Rinny must have dropped it! She was here, all right!”

“Nice work, Pinkie!” Applejack said. “Guess that means she went into the woods fer some reason.”

All this while, Fluttershy had been listening to Winona’s barks and yips, nodding solemnly. As the others were congratulating Pinkie on her discovery, she turned and cried “Hang on, everypony!”

They all turned to face her.

“Um, I’m not sure what happened exactly, but Winona says something else was here.”

“Something else?” Twilight asked. “What? Did… did it attack Turing?”

“N-no! There’s no sign of a struggle!” she said. “But, um, Winona doesn’t know what kind of creature it was,” she added quietly, her eyes downcast.

Winona whimpered, lowering her head as well.

“O-oh, but it’s not your fault, Winona!” Fluttershy said, patting Winona on the head. “We can figure out what it is later, now that we have the scent!”

Winona perked up and gave a happy bark.

Rainbow Dash wore a sour look. “Wait, so all we know is that something came through here?”

Fluttershy winced. “Ummm… well, Winona says it was big and hairy. That’s something.” She swallowed. “But, well, she doesn’t recognize the smell.”

“Actually, that might help,” Twilight said. “Fluttershy, if you could have Winona sniff different hair samples or things like that and tell you which one it is, maybe we could identify it.”

“Oh! Oh, yes, that’s a wonderful idea, Twilight!” Fluttershy cheered.

“Well, in the meantime,” Applejack said, “what’re we gonna do to find Turing Test?”

Pinkie stood up straight, a determined look on her face. “We’ll just have to search the whole Everfree!” She paused, furrowing her brow. “Wait… no, that would take a really long time. The Everfree’s ginormous!”

“That’s true, Pinkie,” Twilight said, tapping her chin. “We’re going to need some help to search an area this big. A lot of help.”

***

”System reactivating. Booting main systems. Mechanical function at 85% capability. Lower cognitive function at 100%. Now loading memory and higher functions… 20 percent… 40 percent… 75 percent… 100 percent. Reactivation complete.”
Her eyes reactivated, and she became aware of her surroundings. She looked around. She was no longer at the bottom of the ravine. She was in a room lined with machinery, much of it adorned with blinking lights, with wires strung along the ceiling.
“Guess it’s operational,” said a voice.
She turned her head to face the speaker, who gave a start and a yelp of surprise as she looked at him.
“V-very operational!” the stallion said.
He was an earth pony with a blonde mane and yellow eyes. A tool belt with several conventional tools and some other devices she’d never seen was around his waist.
“Can’t believe it’s this responsive,” said another voice. A gray pegasus stallion with a dark brown mane flew into view, and she looked up at him. He had a similar tool belt and a flat cap atop his head. She noticed this stallion had blue eyes. When she examined him closer, she saw that within his pupils were circular parts that rotated and constricted.
They were mechanical.
“Well, looks like this one might be good salvage after all. Hopefully we can find a buyer, or else we may have to use it for parts--”
“Excuse me,” Turing said, startling them both. “I cannot allow you to sell me or utilize me for any of my parts. I need my parts.”
“Oh,” said the first stallion, the earth pony. “Guess it has an owner.”
“Or had, at least,” said the other with a roll of his mechanical eyes. He landed and stared at her. “Robot: do you know your owner’s name?”
“I do not have an ‘owner,’” she replied, “but I do have an end user.”
“Whoa, whoa, whoa, is this thing an independent robot?” the first pony said, practically shoving his winged brother out of the way. He cleared his throat. “Um… robot, who is your end user?”
“Twilight Sparkle.”
They both froze. “Oh, no way,” the earth pony brother breathed. “Sonic, you don’t think…?”
The pegasus brother landed. Sweat formed on his brow. “Easy there, Screwdriver. Let’s… let’s just see.”
Turing looked from one to another. “Forgive me, but it seems that your names are Sonic and Screwdriver?”
They both nodded numbly.
“Then I should introduce myself as well. My name is Turing Test.”
Screwdriver sank to his haunches. “I don’t believe it… bro, it is her! Twilight’s robot! Just like Grandpa and Grandma used to talk about!”
Sonic nodded. “You’re right. I can’t believe we…” He shook his head. “I gotta go tell someone. Just a second. Screwy, just keep an eye on her while I’m gone!”
As he flew off, disappearing into a nearby hallway, Turing looked to Screwdriver, who smiled nervously.
“I… it’s nice to finally meet you,” he said, offering a sheepish grin.
“‘Finally?’ You were anticipating my arrival?” She looked around at the room again. “I do not recognize this place. Where am I?”
“This is our lab. Well, workshop. Wellll, it’s a lab, workshop, and a bit of everything else, really. A dining room, for example. In fact, you’re sort of standing on my muffin.”
Turing looked down and raised her hoof. First of all, she saw that she had indeed stepped on his muffin, probably when she first activated and got to her hooves. Second, more surprisingly, was the fact that the metal on her foreleg and hoof was discolored and had a strange, greenish patina. Such corrosion could only have built up after…
...years.
Her eyes constricted as she looked to Screwdriver. “You found me at the bottom of the ravine.”
“Y-yes,” he said nervously, shrinking from her gaze. “You were in bad shape. My brother and I had to do a lot of repair and replacement work on your inner machinery to get you back in working order, since we wanted to see how well you could really function.”
“How long was I there?”
“I… I’m not really sure…”
“Then what year is it currently?”
He told her. She took a step back.
“Does that help?” he squeaked.
“I… I have been inactive for 62 years,” she whispered.
“Oh,” he breathed. Then he offered her a weak smile. “Well, I guess Princess Twilight sure will be happy to see you!”

***

Town Hall was nearly packed with ponies as the mayor took the stage. The room was still filled with dozens and dozens of voices all gabbing away. Some were merely curious or confused while others were irritated about being called so suddenly for a town meeting.

“Citizens of Ponyville!” the mayor called, raising her hooves as she took to the podium. Several cries went up, and many clamored, demanding to know what was going on. “Everypony, everypony, please, remain calm! I will explain what’s going on in a moment!”

Gradually the townsponies quieted down. When the room had gone still, the mayor cleared her throat.

“Citizens of Ponyville,” she began again, “a matter of grave importance has been brought to my attention. One of our own has gone missing, and we are calling on ponies to mount a rescue!”

The crowd murmured nervously at that.

“To explain the situation better than I could, here is our own Princess Twilight Sparkle!”

As Twilight took the stage, walking up to the podium, a cheer followed by loud stomping filled the hall.

“Thank you, everypony, for coming,” Twilight said to the gathered citizens. “I’m sorry to ask this of you all, but my friend Turing Test has gone missing.”

There was another murmur from the crowd. The word “robot” was audible among the chatter.

Twilight frowned but pressed on. “Turing Test was getting some ingredients from Zecora in the woods. On her way back, we think she encountered some kind of creature. We aren’t sure what happened next, but she should have been back hours ago. I can only assume that… that something has happened to her. My friends and I can’t search the Everfree by ourselves, though; it’s just too big! That’s why we’re calling on anypony who’s willing to help to come search with us!”

A sharp, derisive laugh cut through the air.

“Excuse me,” said a voice, causing the crowd to part slightly, revealing the speaker.

Twilight kept her expression calm, but inwardly she cringed when she saw Spoiled Rich standing there.

“Not that I mean any disrespect, Princess Twilight,” Spoiled Rich said, bowing slightly, wearing her eternally smug grin, “but does this really warrant the whole town’s involvement? If it were a real pony, I could understand. But you wish for us to risk ourselves in the Everfree for a machine?” She scoffed, waving a hoof dismissively. “It’s not like your mechanical pony can get hungry or cold, after all. I’m sure if you and your friends keep searching, you’ll eventually find it on your own.”

A few ponies began to murmur again at that.

Twilight grit her teeth. They agree with her… even after all this time, even after what she’s done--

“Hey now, that’s not fair!” a voice rang out. All eyes turned to see Bon Bon, Lyra right next to her. “Turing Test helped me out, and Twilight and her friends too! She’s a hero!”

“And she came to us for romantic advice,” Lyra added. “That sounds like a real pony to me!” She raised her hoof and looked to Twilight. “I volunteer to help!”

“Me too!” Bon Bon shouted, holding up her hoof as well.

On the other side of the room, Derpy took to the air, rising above the crowd. “Turing Test’s really nice! I know my vision’s not the best, but I can look from the air, Princess Twilight! I volunteer too!”

“Count us in!” said Flitter, who took to the air alongside her sister Cloud Chaser.

“She was a lifesaver at the spa!” Lotus piped up. “Aloe and I will help!”

“SHE’S STRONG, BUT GENTLE! A REAL CLASS ACT! I’LL HELP TOO!” Bulk Biceps bellowed. “YEAAHHH!!”

“The Ponyville Musicians’ Guild has your back, Princess Twilight,” Octavia declared. Vinyl Scratch gave a firm nod just behind her.

“If something has happened,” the Doctor said, raising his hoof, “you’ll no doubt need somepony to repair her. I volunteer as well!”

One by one, dozens of ponies raised their hooves, many who had been helped by Turing Test while she’d assisted the Cutie Mark Crusaders, others who had simply grown accustomed to the idea that Turing was one of their own.

Twilight covered her mouth with her hoof, tears coming to her eyes. Practically every pony in the hall had their hoof raised.

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw the Cutie Mark Crusaders whispering to Diamond Tiara, who gave them a nod and then spoke up.

“Look how many ponies like Turing Test, Mom and Dad!” she said to her parents. “Doesn’t it make you want to help too?”

Spoiled Rich wore a tight, forced smile, but she gave a small nod.

Filthy Rich wore a more genuine smile and patted Diamond Tiara on the head. “Right you are, Diamond Tiara!” He puffed out his chest and looked to Twilight at the podium. “Princess, Barnyard Bargains will gladly donate lanterns, rope, and other supplies toward these rescue efforts! And since this is a robot we’re discussing here, I have several metal detectors in stock that I’ll donate as well!”

A cheer rose up as the hall applauded.

Twilight wore a beaming smile. “I…” She paused, taking a deep breath. “Everypony… thank you! Thank you so much!”

The mayor took the podium from her. “In an event like this, we’ll need ponies to work in teams for safety, knowing how dangerous the Everfree is. We’ll need pegasi in the air, earth ponies and unicorns on the ground. Please go see Rarity and Applejack if you wish to volunteer to search. We’ll get a map to divide up the search area and search more efficiently. We’ll also need several other ponies to stay behind and provide food, water, and possible medical attention. Any nurses or doctors available, please help us set up first aid stations by the Everfree Forest’s edge. We’ll begin searching as soon as we can! Now, let's go find Turing Test!”

As ponies began to line up to volunteer and Applejack and Rarity took down their names, Rainbow Dash flew through the door and landed right next to Twilight.

“Rainbow Dash! How are things coming with Fluttershy?” Twilight asked.

“Well, she’s working with Winona already,” Rainbow Dash replied. “She got some samples from the vet, and she apparently keeps clippings in her cottage for scrapbooking--”

“Scrapbooking?” Twilight repeated, raising an eyebrow.

Rainbow shrugged. “It doesn’t make any sense to me either, but, eh, we’ve all got our hobbies.” She waved a hoof. “Anyway, she’s got a lot to go through. She said she’s also asking her animal friends to spread the word to their friends in the Everfree Forest. Maybe one of them saw something.”

“That’s great, Rainbow! I sure hope one of them did!”

“Same here,” she replied. Then she looked around. “Whoa… we got all these ponies to help look for Tee?”

Twilight grinned broadly. “Yeah,” she said softly. “Who would have guessed?”

***

Turing Test walked through the door of the castle. They’d been in Ponyville the whole time. Ponyville had looked almost the same as it always had, but there had been small differences. Strange machines flew far overhead. Ponies carried small devices with them with glowing panels. Some had mechanical eyes, like Sonic, and some even had mechanical limbs in place of their original ones.
And, most startling of all, other mechanical ponies walked the streets alongside their organic counterparts.
“Don’t bother them,” Sonic had said when she’d tried to talk to one of them. “That’s a service robot. It’s probably on an errand for its master.”
“Service robot?” she’d asked.
“Yeah,” Screwdriver had said. “There are a few independent units that have fully functional intelligence like you, though. Not many in Ponyville, but a few!”
“I see,” she’d said. “Then there are other robots now. I am no longer the only one.”
She was brought out of these thoughts as she entered the castle. It looked just as it always had. The huge, cavernous hall, the winding staircase, the tall glass windows… it was all familiar. Granted, there were a few changes in the carpet, the decorations, the curtains, and other small details, but it was otherwise the same as the day she’d left it.
The day she’d left it.
She paused, causing Sonic and Screwdriver to look back at her.
“Hey, are you coming?”
“Affirmative,” she replied. “I… I apologize. I am still shocked that so much time has passed.”
“Well, not as shocked as Princess Twilight was when I told her that you were--”
“Twilight Sparkle!” Turing suddenly shouted, bounding forward. “Are you here? It is I, your friend, Turing Test!”
She ran forward when she heard hoofsteps, and a figure appeared at the top of the stairs at the end of the entrance hall.
“Turing? Is… is it really you?”
Turing cast her eyes upwards. Twilight stood there. She looked exactly the same as she had before.
“Twilight Sparkle… affirmative. I am Turing Test.”
Twilight could no longer contain her joy, and she teleported down the stairs, directly in front of Turing Test. She embraced her, laughing and crying at the same time.
“Oh, Turing Test!” she managed to say. “Turing, Turing, Turing… it’s been so long!”
“It… has, apparently.”
“We looked for you for so long… but we could never find you! My friends told me I should stop looking, but I… I didn’t want to…”
Turing patted her on the back gently as she returned the embrace. “Do not worry, Twilight Sparkle. The important thing is that I was found. I am here now.”
“Yes,” Twilight said, heaving a sigh. “Yes, that’s right. You’re here now! You’re finally back! Oh, Turing, I’ve missed you!”
Sonic gave a cough.
“Oh! Ahaha,” Twilight said, releasing Turing. “Boys, thank you so much for finding Turing and fixing her up. I’ll be happy to pay you for your trouble.”
“Oh, no, Princess,” Screwdriver said, waving his hoof, “we couldn’t possibly--”
“I insist!” she said, holding her head up. “And I’ll also need you to help remove any tarnish and corrosion on Turing’s hull.”
“Well, since you insist,” Sonic said with a grin, “my brother and I will be happy to help.”
“Great. Thank you,” she said, giving a small bow to them.
Taking their cue, the brothers turned and left.
“The Doctor and Derpy’s grandchildren,” Twilight said.
“Ah,” Turing replied.
“They’re good kids. They repair robots and other machines, and they also do a little bit of salvage work on the side. That’s how they found you.”
Turing said nothing but looked around the castle, apparently searching for something.
“Something wrong, Turing?” Twilight asked.
“I am wondering where Spike the Dragon is.”
“Oh, Spike’s just on a diplomatic mission to the dragon territories,” Twilight said. “He’ll be back in a few days. And boy will he be happy to see you!”
“I see,” she said. “I have many questions for you, Twilight. But first, I must remark that you seem unaffected by the passage of time. Has technology advanced so well as to counteract aging?”
“No, silly,” Twilight said, waving a hoof. “I’m an alicorn. It… well, it comes with a few benefits. Not aging is one.”
“I see.” Turing nodded. “I am curious to learn more about how robots came to be a normal feature of Equestria, but I would like to see our other friends. May we go see them?”
Twilight’s smile faded for a moment. It returned again a moment later, but it was far more strained.
“Turing,” she sighed. “It’s… it’s been sixty years. We can go visit Pinkie, if you like. She’s as energetic as ever, if a bit slower. But… the others…”
Turing stood there in silence, not understanding what Twilight was saying.
Twilight took a deep breath. “Turing… the others have all passed away.”
Turing took a step back. “You mean they have all died?”
Twilight nodded solemnly. She lowered her head. “Some for a long time. Rarity went just last year. We all talked about you from time to time, though, Turing… we all hoped that eventually you’d come back.”
Turing stared back at Twilight, saying nothing.
“Turing? I know, it’s hard to accept, but that’s the truth. You have to accept that--”
“No.” Turing shook her head, stepping back. “No. No, that is… this is… enough.”
“Turing?”
“Enough!”

Simulation Ended.

It was dark outside. Stars glimmered above. It was nearly midnight. Deep shadows covered her. Without her nightvision, she could barely glimpse the slight movement of unseen nocturnal insects and lizards in the darkness all around her.

Soon the moon would pass overhead, briefly illuminating her world again.

She paused to consider what had just transpired. She’d considered a number of factors and utilized her visual and auditory memory to construct an elaborate hypothetical situation. A fantasy of sorts.

She’d wondered what the future might be like if she was found far into the future. Of course, there was no telling what would happen for real, but still…

(“Turing… the others have all passed away.”)

No.

(“Some for a long time.”)

No no no.

(“We all talked about you from time to time, though, Turing… we all hoped that eventually you’d come back.”)

“NO!” she shrieked, interrupting her repeated message. She realized what she’d done immediately and began looping her distress signal again.

But still, the awful feeling returned. The fear she felt now was strong, though not as strong as the feeling she’d experienced when she’d first reactivated at the bottom of the ravine. And yet now, it was somehow even more dreadful.

She’d realized something far worse. Something undeniable. Something unavoidable.

I had not realized… I never considered that I, as a robot, would experience this. I…

This train of thought was interrupted by a sudden system message: Warning: Battery power at 3%.

She froze. It was too soon! She should be able to have power for a few more hours. At this rate, she would not last for more than thirty minutes! How had she used up so much power?

Then it hit her: the simulation.

By allowing myself to speculate so vividly in an effort to distract myself from my own fear, I have utilized more power than I realized. How inefficient and foolish… I truly am becoming more like organic ponies. Ha ha.

In any other circumstance, that might make me happy. But now…

She knew what she had to do. If she continued to remain conscious, she would squander her remaining power. Even though she feared never being reactivated, or only being found in the far future, there was only one way to make her power last.

Now entering modified sleep mode. Vocal systems are to remain active until power depletes. System shutdown in 3… 2… 1…

Her eyes darkened, though her voice continued.

“Attention: Help! This is Turing Test. I am incapacitated at the bottom of this ravine and unable to respond. Please assist me or notify Twilight Sparkle or Spike the Dragon in Ponyville. Repeating… Attention: Help! This is Turing Test. I am incapacitated at the bottom of this ravine and unable to respond. Please assist me or notify Twilight Sparkle or Spike the Dragon in Ponyville. Repeating…”

She continued, unconsciously calling for help into the empty air above, her voice echoing out over the cold stone of the ravine. An hour passed, and as it did, the moon also passed overhead, casting a silvery light down into the chasm. The tiniest glint of metal was visible in the moonlight.

But gradually the little power Turing had depleted. Her voice became slower, deeper, quieter, and finally it decayed into a mumble, and then, at last, silence.

Yet, overhead, a soft electronic beeping echoed softly in the darkness. The beeping increased in volume and frequency.

Something moved at the edge of the ravine. Voices called out. Wings flapped. They gathered, voices chatting excitedly. Then one of them looked down.

They called out: “It’s her!”

***

Rebooting… reboot complete. Warning: multiple errors detected.

Her eyes reactivated. She looked around. She was in a room with a wooden floor. Red curtains were drawn over the window. Twilight Sparkle was…

She paused. Twilight Sparkle was standing right there, smiling at her.

“Twilight Sparkle?” she asked.

“Yes, Turing. It’s me,” she replied with a smile.

Turing leaped forward and embraced her. “Twilight Sparkle! I am so happy to see you again!”

“Same here, Turing,” Twilight said, laughing and returning the hug.

“Hey, don’t hog all the hugs, Twilight!” Pinkie said, bouncing into view with a broad grin on her face.

“Pinkie Pie. You are here as well?”

“Of course I am, Rinny! We all are!”

Turing looked around. It was true. All her friends were there. Fluttershy had tears in her eyes. As did Rainbow Dash, though she was trying to wipe them without Turing noticing. Spike was there as well, though his eyes looked tired and heavy.

“I see,” Turing said. She released Twilight, only to spread her forelegs wide. “Group hug initiated.”

They laughed and joined her in a group hug.

“I am so glad that you were able to locate me. Also, it appears that my auditory systems are working again. My ears broke off when I fell into the ravine.”

“Thank the Doc fer that,” Applejack said, looking over to the side of the room.

The Doctor blushed slightly. His coat was stained with oil, and the floor around him was littered with tools and wires as well as some other bits of machinery. Derpy stood next to him.

“You repaired me, Doctor?”

“Yes, well,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck. “It was nothing!”

“Nothing?!” Derpy exclaimed, taking to the air as she gawked at him. “You were wonderful, Doc!”

“Thank you, Doctor,” she said, going over to him, giving him a hug as well.

“Ah ha, w-well,” he said, “I did my best. S-still!”

He pushed her back and gestured at the machinery at his hooves.

“These components were used in my repair?”

“Some, yes. Others… well…”

He held up a familiar piece of machinery for her to see.

“That is my wing.”

“Yes. While most of the damage you received consisted of some loose wires and a few snapped casings and such, I’m afraid your wing has been smashed quite thoroughly, and your air intake system pipes are dented. I… I am sorry, Turing, but I was unable to repair them. You can no longer fly.”

Turing bowed her head. “That is unfortunate. However, I am confident that either you or my friend Gadget will be able to restore that function eventually. In the meantime, I am still grateful for your assistance, Doctor.”

“You are quite welcome, my friend!” he said, holding his head up proudly. “But there are far more ponies that you owe your thanks to!”

Turing cocked her head to the side at that. “Other than the ponies in this room?”

“Turing Test,” Twilight said, putting her hoof on Turing’s shoulder, “a lot of ponies chipped in today. Applejack and Winona followed your trail to where you took off after the manticore. Fluttershy eventually found out that it was a manticore, and some of her bird friends said they saw a ‘shiny pony’ chasing a manticore. By that time, we already had plenty of ponies searching for you. Pinkie and the Cakes baked some food for everyone to keep their strength up. Doctor Stable and the nurses set up medical stations for the rescuers. Filthy Rich donated metal detectors to help find you, and when a team of ponies finally did find you, Big Mac and Bulk Biceps both helped clear the boulders you were under so a team of pegasi could airlift you back to Ponyville.”

“Yeah, including me and Derpy here!” Rainbow Dash chimed in.

“That’s right!” Derpy said, doing a loop in the air. “Oh, I was so happy when we found you! And then Rainbow Dash and Flitter and Cloud Chaser and Thunderlane and I got you back to Ponyville! It was so exciting, especially when Doc started working on you--”

The Doctor cleared his throat.

“Oh,” Derpy said, landing as her cheeks colored. “Sorry, I guess I’m still excited.”

Turing bowed to her. “Do not be sorry. I am very grateful for your rescue.” Then she paused, tapping her chin in thought. “Twilight Sparkle… it seems you enlisted the aid of many others. How many other ponies were involved in my rescue? I would like to thank them as well.”

Twilight and the others started to chuckle.

“Have I said something amusing?”

“Welllll… it might take you a little time to thank them all, Turing,” Twilight replied.

With her magic, she opened the door and led Turing out into the hallway. They walked along it, and Turing heard the sound of a great many ponies talking. They led her to a stage that was covered with a curtain.

I know this place. We are in Ponyville’s town hall. Why are we here?

Twilight held open the curtain, and Turing Test stepped through.

A voice cried out “There she is! She’s okay!” and the hall erupted with thunderous cheers.

She froze where she stood.

The town hall was filled. Ponies from all around town were there. Almost all of them looked tired. Many of them were dirty and sweaty, with scratches and dirt on their coats. So many ponies that she’d met… Lyra and Bon Bon, Vinyl Scratch and Octavia, Big Mac and Granny Smith, the Cutie Mark Crusaders, Silver Spanner, Mr. and Mrs. Cake, Golden Harvest, Berry Punch, the Spa ponies, Cranky, Flitter, Cloud Chaser, Thunderlane, Blossomforth, Ambrosia, Button Mash, and many more. Ponies she didn’t even know. And of course, Twilight and her friends.

Her eyes shrank to pinpricks. “I… I…”

When the cheers died down, Twilight stood before her, gesturing to the crowd. “Practically the whole town came to help you, Turing! Isn’t it great! Look at all the wonderful friends you’ve made!”

Turing cast her gaze all around. “It… this is…”

“SPEECH!” Bulk Biceps shouted. This got a round of laughter, but also a round of applause. Others joined him in chanting “Speech! Speech! Speech!”

“I think they want you to say something, Turing,” Twilight whispered to her. She gave her a grin and a wink. “If you don’t want to, then…”

“No,” she replied, and stepped forward. “I will speak.”

The crowd fell silent.

Turing raised her head.

“My friends,” she began, “I… I do not know what to say. I was in danger, true, but… the Everfree Forest is filled with many dangerous creatures. You all…”

She paused, lowering her head.

“You put yourselves at risk. I do not understand. I… I am merely a robot. I am only a machine. Why… How? How could you put yourselves at risk to save me? I… I am not worthy of such sacrifice. I am…”

“Horse apples!” Granny Smith shouted.

Several gasps were heard, and Granny Smith covered her mouth with one hoof.

“Oh, er, uh… pardon my language,” she said, chuckling slightly. The crowd laughed with her. “Lookie here, Turing Test!” she continued. “All these here ponies came here because they care about ya! Yer no less a pony than any o’ us!”

“Maybe even more than some of us!” Cranky shouted, getting another round of laughter from the crowd.

“Heh. Darn tootin’! Point is,” she said, “when Twilight an’ the others told us you were in trouble, that was all that mattered! It don’t matter if yer a robot! Yer one o’ us!”

“YEAH!” Bulk Biceps shouted.

“Bravo!” Octavia added.

Dozens more cries of approval rang out.

“You’re the best, Turing!”

“You’re awesome, Turing!”

“You’re our friend, Turing!”

“Eeyup!”

The hall was filled with similar cries and cheers. All of them to support her.

And so, for the first time in her existence, Turing felt no different from any other pony.

“My friends,” she said, once the hall became quiet again. “I… thank you. Thank you so much. This is truly the happiest moment of my… life.”

There was a sound behind her, and she turned. It was Mayor Mare, who had cleared her throat.

“Well, there is one last order of business, then, Turing Test,” she said. She stood before the crowd. “As mayor of this proud village, I have a proclamation to make!”

The crowd fell completely silent.

“The measure of a pony is not in what they are, be they earth pony, pegasus, unicorn, or anything else, including machine! The measure of a pony is in how much they care for others and, in turn, how much they are cared for. Tonight, we have truly seen the measure of this pony whom we call Turing Test. Yes, the value of a pony is not in what they are, but who they are! And so, by the power vested in me by the citizens of Ponyville…”

She raised her head solemnly, placing her hoof over her heart.

“...I hereby declare Turing Test to be a legal citizen of Ponyville, with all the rights and privileges that such a designation entails!”

The ponies gathered all roared in approval, stomping the ground and jumping for joy.

“And I will personally recommend to Her Highness Princess Celestia herself that Turing Test be given citizenship status not only in Ponyville, but all of Equestria!”

Another deafening cheer filled the hall.

Amid all these cheers, Turing Test simply stood there, dumbfounded.

***

At last, after a long day, Turing Test, Spike, and Twilight returned home. Spike had been so exhausted that Twilight had simply placed him on her back and carried him home. Once they reached Spike’s room, Twilight used her magic to put the little dragon to bed, tucking him in without waking him as she shut the door.

“And now, Turing, I really think we ought to go to bed,” Twilight said with a long yawn.

“Acknowledged. You are clearly fatigued.” She paused. “Twilight Sparkle… perhaps I should stand guard?”

Twilight looked over her shoulder at her. “Stand guard? What for?”

“I… want to ensure your safety.”

“Oh Turing,” Twilight chuckled, “I thought you were past this stage. You haven’t felt the need to guard me while I slept since we first activated you!”

“That is correct, but…”

She lowered her head.

“...my recent experience has made me more cognizant of certain things. For instance, while it is very unlikely that anything will happen to you while you sleep, I still wish to be prepared for any emergency.”

“Turing, I can’t really sleep with you watching me all night,” Twilight said, rubbing her head as she heaved a tired sigh. “Please, just let me rest.”

“As a compromise, I could wait outside your door. That would be an ideal way to monitor your vitals without disturbing you.”

Twilight paused. She rubbed her eyes tiredly before staring back at Turing.

“Okay, Turing, what’s this all about? You wouldn’t be acting this way if something wasn’t wrong.”

Her ears lowered. “Twilight Sparkle… I am afraid.”

Twilight raised her head, her eyes widening. “Afraid? You mean… you’ve experienced fear?”

“Affirmative,” she replied. “Allow me to explain.”

She went to a nearby window, placing her hooves on the sill as she looked out at Ponyville and, beyond it, the Everfree Forest. She was quiet for a moment before she began to speak again.

“When I fell to the bottom of the ravine and realized that I was broken and unable to escape on my own, I became afraid. I feared that I would not see you or my other friends again. I considered my position and realized the possibility that I would run out of power and never be found. To become unconscious and never have another experience or interaction… though I am not alive, it would be analogous to death. And when I thought that I might die, I became afraid. I questioned what would become of me, and I questioned what would become of my soul, or if I indeed have one. That feeling of fear was more terrible and dreadful than I ever would have suspected. I feel as though I understand organic ponies better now, and I have a greater appreciation for the strength they have to deal with such potent emotions.”

Twilight smiled and moved to go to the window as well to comfort her, but then Turing stepped back, turning to face her.

“There is more, Twilight Sparkle. After I considered the possibility that I might ‘die,’ I realized that there was a worse possibility.”

“A-and that is?” Twilight asked, leaning forward.

“That I might not.” She took a step forward, staring Twilight in the eyes. “Twilight Sparkle, my body is mechanical in nature. My components can be repaired or replaced. With proper maintenance, I may continue to exist for an indefinite period of time. The upper limit of time until my cognitive abilities cease to function is unknown. Essentially, as long as my ‘brain’ remains intact, I may continue to exist for a very long time. Because I do not age, it is possible that I may exist for many centuries. For millennia, perhaps.

“However, organic ponies’ lifespans are much shorter than that. A mere hundred years is considered extreme longevity for a pony. I now realize that though I may live for many centuries, my friends will… will not.”

Twilight swallowed. “I see,” she said quietly.

“And it was then that I felt a far worse fear. As time passes, my friends will pass away, and I will not have them in my life any longer. I had never considered the significance of mortality before, and… oh, Twilight Sparkle, how can it be true?!”

The suddenness of this outburst caught Twilight off guard, and she took a step back. “Turing…”

“How will Applejack’s farm go on without her to tend it? Who will celebrate a happy occasion when Pinkie Pie is gone? I… I do not know if I can face a future without them. Without Rainbow Dash. Without Rarity. Without Fluttershy. Without…”

Her eyes constricted suddenly, and she looked up at Twilight as a horrible thought occurred to her.

“Maud,” she whispered. “No… she too will… will one day…”

“Turing, stop!” Twilight cried, reaching for her.

Turing’s eyes refocused on Twilight, as if she’d momentarily forgotten she was there. She had tears streaming down her face.

“You are crying,” Turing observed. “I apologize. I did not mean to make you upset. But of course, you understand this feeling. At least… at least you will always be there.”

Twilight sniffled and gave her a weak smile and a nod. “Yes, Turing. I…” Then she froze. “W-wait. Turing, what do you mean?”

“I mean that you too are ageless, since you are an alicorn. Like me, you will continue to exist for a long time. Therefore, we will not be lonely, because we will be together. We will…”

But she stopped when she saw Twilight shaking her head.

“Turing Test, I… I’m sorry, but that’s not right,” she whispered. “I’m just as mortal as my friends.”

“That… no, that cannot be. You are an alicorn, so like Celestia and Luna, you--”

“Turing, a long time ago, Starswirl the Bearded realized that the task of raising the sun and moon was draining the energy and vitality of the unicorns who were raising it. But he also realized that Celestia and Luna had a special inherent affinity with the sun and moon. He saw that by raising them, Celestia and Luna would be re-energized and regenerated. And that’s why they’ve managed to stay so youthful. It’s that connection that keeps them young, not their being alicorns.

“The truth is that I wondered the same thing when I first became a princess.” Twilight paused, chuckling as she looked back at her own wings. “But Celestia told me that it wouldn’t change anything. My magic might be even stronger, and it’s possible that it might cause me to age slightly slower than my friends, but, just like them, I’ll age, grow old, and… and one day, I’ll die.”

Turing staggered back, as if struck. “I… Twilight Sparkle, no…”

“I’m sorry, Turing,” she said, bowing her head. “But it’s true. And when I worried that I would have to outlive my friends, I was terrified. To tell the truth, I was actually a bit relieved to learn that I was still mortal. But… I understand how you must feel.”

Turing sank to her haunches with a loud clang. She held her hooves up, staring at them. “How… how can you accept such a thing? It is not fair. How can you go on with your life, knowing that one day it will end?”

Twilight sat down in front of her, putting her hoof on Turing’s shoulder. “Turing, listen,” she began. “You might be right. It isn’t fair. It’s a horrible thing to think about, but it’s the nature of reality. I guess organic ponies like me deal with it by… well, I guess first of all by not thinking about it.” She chuckled dryly. “But, more importantly, we deal with it by focusing on our lives now, not our death later. We focus on the fact that we are here and might as well make the best of it while also trying to build the best future we can for those who will come after us.”

“You refer to new generations? Children?”

Twilight nodded. “Yeah. Not necessarily ours, but just all beings. Just like you’re the first robot of your kind, there might be more in the future. You care about making sure they have a good world to exist in, don’t you?”

Turing nodded slowly. “I see. I believe that I understand. I… I feel somewhat better, Twilight Sparkle.”

Twilight smiled as she got to her hooves. Turing did the same.

“A question, Twilight Sparkle. Do you believe you will have foals one day?”

Twilight blinked and then blushed at the question. “Well, Turing, I don’t know… but, I… yes, I think I’d like to, someday. I think I’d like being a mom.”

“Then,” Turing said, placing a hoof to her chest, “in that case, I know what I will do.”

Twilight tilted her head, waiting for Turing to continue.

“I will tell them. I will tell your grandchildren, and their grandchildren, about you. I will tell them about my friend Twilight Sparkle, the pony who sacrificed much for her friends, and who gave me, a mere machine, the chance to have a good life, to learn about friendship, and to value my own existence. I will tell them about my wonderful friend, as I will for the descendants of my other friends, and in that way, through my memories, you will go on. You will live forever through me.”

Twilight broke down, letting a sob escape her as she threw her hooves around Turing. “Oh… oh, Turing… I…”

The two held each other, the sound of Twilight’s crying echoing softly in the vast, empty hallway in her castle.

***

Celestia stood at the balcony, watching the sun rise in the east over Canterlot. Once it was fully dawn, her horn ceased to glow. Behind her, the whirring of machinery and the metallic hoofsteps of her guest were heard as she came up alongside her.

“A thousand years… more mornings than I can count… but still I find the rising sun to be beautiful.”

“Then you still find joy in your life, even though you have lived for so long.” Turing nodded approvingly. “That is good to know.”

Celestia smiled. “Of course I do, Turing Test. In fact, now that my sister is back with me, I feel more alive than I have in centuries. And though I have had many friends pass on over the years, I still hold their memories in my heart, even as I make new friends. Each one is special and wonderful in their own way.”

She and Turing shared a moment of silence as they looked out over the ivory white buildings of Canterlot as they were bathed in the golden light of the rising sun.

“I am incapable of forgetting anything or anypony,” Turing said as she continued to stare out at the city. “I remember every experience I have had with perfect accuracy. In that way, unlike an organic pony, my memories of my friends will never deteriorate or be forgotten. However, I wish to ensure that I will always carry Twilight Sparkle’s influence. Before visiting you, I received her permission to implement a new Law to replace the ‘Three Laws’ that were previously implemented.”

Celestia raised an eyebrow. “And what Law is that?”

“In truth, it is not really a law, but a Guideline. It states, simply: ‘Remember Twilight Sparkle.’”

Celestia lowered her head to look at her more clearly. “That is very touching, Turing Test, but do you really think that is wise? The last time you had to deal with any Laws, they limited your ability to act to protect your friends.”

“It is true that I am able to function without any Laws or Guidelines. However, as there may one day come a time that Twilight Sparkle is no longer with me, I believe codifying her influence will enable me to continue being a friend to organic ponies and to Equestria. Furthermore, because it is not a hard rule, I will still retain my autonomy. Having such a procedure hard-coded into my function may act as my conscience, without limiting my action. I have therefore added it to my default programming.”

Celestia smiled. “Thank you for telling me this. If Twilight has no issue with such a Guideline, then I approve as well. I am certain you will do her proud no matter what the future may bring.”

Turing looked up at her. “I realize that you initially held a low opinion of me. I hope you are not displeased at the thought of me continuing to exist alongside you and your sister for a long time into the future.”

But Celestia shook her head. “Not at all. I’ve grown to appreciate you as well, Turing Test. Besides, if I’ve managed to accept sharing the future with Discord, then I think you’ll be an easy challenge.” She chuckled. “I’m glad Twilight Sparkle arranged for us to talk about this. I hope I’ve been of help to you, and you are welcome to seek my counsel whenever you wish. Actually, Turing, there’s one more thing I wanted to do for you.”

She cleared her throat, and her assistant, Raven, came forward holding a scroll with her magic.

“I’ve received Mayor Mare’s letter declaring your citizenship in Ponyville and recommending your citizenship as a member of this nation. In truth, Twilight could have granted it to you as well, but she said she didn’t want to step on my hooves.”

Turing looked down. “They are rather large, now that you mention it.”

Celestia rolled her eyes but smiled regardless. “Well, then, as a Princess of Equestria and by all the powers vested in me,” she said, unfurling the scroll, “I hereby grant you, Turing Test, status as an official citizen of Equestria, with all the rights and privileges that designation entails.”

Turing Test bowed, accepting the scroll as Celestia gave it to her. She then stepped forward and hugged Celestia, who was surprised by the sudden affectionate gesture but ultimately relaxed and returned the embrace.

“I am very grateful, Your Majesty.”

“You’ve earned it, Turing Test.” She raised her head as Turing stepped back. “Go forward, Turing, and live your life.”

Turing nodded once more. "Acknowledged," she said. "That is what I will do."

To be continued…

Face to Face

View Online

Twilight and Turing Test sat across from the mayor as she sat behind her desk in City Hall. The large room was filled with books, and plaques and pictures hung on the wall. Papers were stacked neatly into boxes on both sides of her desk, with one marked ‘In’ and the other marked ‘Out.’ The drapes were open, and bright morning sunlight streamed in through the windows.

The mayor was checking the papers in front of her, signing her name to a few, before she finally pushed them over to Twilight and Turing, giving them a smile.

“And that should be it!” the mayor said. “If you’ll sign those, Turing Test, you’ll legally and officially be a citizen of Ponyville.”

Turing glanced down at the papers. “May I examine them first?”

“Certainly!” she said. “If you need a little time to examine them, you can even bring them back later--”

Turing flipped through them and set them back down. “There is no need. I have examined them.”

“My goodness!” the mayor said, adjusting her spectacles. “You really are a fast reader!”

“It has been remarked,” Turing said, getting a giggle out of Twilight Sparkle. “These documents are very similar to the ones that I examined with Twilight Sparkle.”

The mayor looked to Twilight, raising an eyebrow.

“I keep some books on local laws in my library,” Twilight explained, holding her head up proudly.

“Ah,” she said, turning back to Turing Test, her smile back in place. “You were saying?”

“I have noticed that these documents are missing some key sections, and others have been edited or marked ‘Other’ or ‘N/A’ in certain areas.”

“Well, yes,” the mayor said, steepling her hooves on the desk as she leaned forward. “Turing Test, we’re all sincere about you being a citizen, but there are certain things that don’t apply to you in the same way. Under ‘species,’ for example, we had to put ‘Other,’ since you don’t fit any of the other categories we usually know. Your age was also problematic, since we don’t really know how old you are. We thought about considering your birthday to be the date you were activated - an event I remember quite well, I might add,” she said, chuckling to herself, “and that would put you at around six and a half months of age, but… well, you aren’t really like any other foal of that age.”

She sighed, closing her eyes before she continued.

“Turing Test, there’s one more thing that I need to discuss with you. Because you’re not really a child, but still not an adult, I personally made the decision to classify you as Princess Twilight’s ward. She’s your guardian and, for tax purposes, you’re her dependent. However… well…”

Twilight blinked. “That all sounds fine to me, Mayor. Is there a problem?”

Mayor Mare cleared her throat. “The problem is that we aren’t really sure about how to classify Turing in terms of her being a minor or an adult.”

“Due to the fact that I am under Twilight Sparkle’s care,” Turing said, “would it not be logical to classify me as a minor?”

She heaved a sigh. “Well, I hate to engage in gossip, but… I’ve heard that you have a… relationship?”

Turing’s ears twitched. “That is correct.”

“If we classify you as a minor, that could have some… ugly legal consequences.”

Twilight’s eyes bulged, and she grimaced. “Oh.”

Turing glanced from Twilight to the mayor. “Consequences? I do not…” She trailed off, her eyes constricting. “Ohhhhhhh.”

“We could classify you as an adult, but that, ah, carries other problems. Questions about taxes, exemptions, voting, etc.”

Turing raised her head. “I may vote?”

“Of course! As a citizen, it is your right to vote in elections! Um, and I hope you’ll remember the way I helped you when that day comes,” she said, flashing a smile.

Twilight cleared her throat, narrowing her eyes.

“Er, what I mean,” the mayor said, adjusting her ascot, “is that as an adult citizen, all the usual things apply. The law says you’d get to vote, serve on jury duty, pay taxes, and so on. But there is one more issue with that, and I’m afraid that I don’t know how to proceed.”

Twilight frowned. “What issues do you mean, Mayor?” she asked.

“I’m willing to accept that Turing Test has the mental maturity to make those kinds of decisions. There’s no problem with her being your ward and still being classified as an adult,” the mayor replied, “but the problem is that, as I understand it, you’re not just her guardian, but her…” she paused, examining a note on her desk, “...’end user’?”

“Correct,” Turing said. “Twilight Sparkle is my end user.”

“So you have to obey her?”

“Affirmative.”

“Regardless of your own opinions or will?”

“Twilight Sparkle respects my opinions and will, but that is correct.”

Twilight’s eyes widened as she understood the mayor’s meaning. “Oh. Oh no…”

“I’m afraid so, Princess Twilight,” the mayor said, shaking her head, “but if she’s an adult, then she needs some independence. If she’s forced to do your bidding, then that means she’s a slave.”

Turing got to her hooves. “I am not a slave.”

“Yes, of course, but under the law, that’s how you appear,” the mayor said, holding up her hooves.

Twilight closed her eyes. “Well… um, what if I…” She paused, taking a deep breath. “What if I relinquished my role as her end user?”

“No!”

The suddenness of this outburst from Turing nearly startled Twilight right out of her seat. She saw that Turing was staring right at her.

“Twilight Sparkle… I cannot operate without you.”

“Turing, you--”

“I am not ready for that responsibility. I cannot imagine what my existence would be without you as my end user.”

Mayor Mare cleared her throat deliberately, getting their attention. “You can see the problem. I’m willing to work with you on this, and we can bend some rules, like overlooking her physical age, but this really is quite important.”

Turing’s eyes shifted. “If that is the only way I can become a citizen, then I refuse to--”

“Turing, calm down,” Twilight said, her voice calm, but stern.

Turing fell silent. “My apologies, Twilight Sparkle,” she said, taking her seat.

The mayor raised her eyebrow and glanced at Twilight.

Twilight took a deep breath. “Listen, Turing Test isn’t ready for this just yet, but I’m in favor of her being independent. Let me propose a compromise.”

The mayor nodded. “What do you have in mind?”

“Luckily, I happen to be a Princess,” Twilight said, giving a small grin as she stood and raised her head proudly, “so I hereby call for a temporary suspension of the rules. I declare that the issue of me being Turing’s end user is suspended for a period of six months or until she decides that she’s ready to be independent. In the meantime, she should be treated as an adult with all the rights and privileges that go along with that. For my part, I give my word that I will not order her to act against her will except in cases that are for her protection or the protection of others.”

The mayor smiled. “You’re becoming more comfortable with your title, Princess Twilight.”

Twilight blushed and looked away, breaking her composure. “W-well, um… the situation called for it.”

The mayor laughed. “Well, that’s fine with me. I’ll make a note of it on Turing Test’s file, and we’ll address the issue in six months.”

Turing raised a hoof. “Then you are saying that Twilight Sparkle will no longer be my end user in six months?”

“Not necessarily,” the mayor said. “It’s just that we’re choosing to ignore it for now and make a decision later. However, if you object, I’ll honor that. Twilight has no say if you choose not to accept this proposal. If so, though, then we’re back to the issue at hoof.”

Turing tapped her chin, considering the matter before replying. “I accept these circumstances.”

Both Twilight and the mayor breathed a sigh of relief.

“Then you can sign these papers and we’ll make it official, Turing Test,” the mayor said.

Turing signed the papers, taking the quill in her magic and writing her name where the mayor had indicated.

“Excellent!” she said, taking the documents back and stacking them neatly. “Also, you have excellent writing.”

“Thank you. I chose a sans-serif font that Rarity classified as ‘elegant.’”

The mayor chuckled. “Well, you know… since you are legally allowed to work and keep the money you earn, and since you seem very good at scanning documents, could I interest you in a temporary job assisting me with organizing the public record system? Pinkie Pie helped me organize it better, but if you could assist me in chasing down some things, I would be very appreciative.”

Turing looked to Twilight.

“Turing, don’t look at me, it’s your decision!” Twilight laughed.

“It is… my decision,” she echoed. She turned to the mayor. “When do you wish for me to assist you?”

“In one week. Would 10 bits per hour be all right?”

“That is acceptable.”

“Well then,” the mayor said, smiling as she put out her hoof, “I look forward to working with you.”

Turing looked down at the mayor’s hoof for a moment, then shook it. “The feeling is mutual.”

***

When they stepped outside City Hall, Twilight looked over at Turing Test and smiled. “Turing, I’m so proud of you today.”

Turing paused, looking not at her, but from left to right, taking in the view of Ponyville before her. “Thank you, Twilight Sparkle. But, in truth, I am not certain what I have done to deserve such treatment.”

“It’s not what you’ve done so much as who you are, Turing,” Twilight replied, chuckling into her hoof. “You managed to overcome the judgments of just about everypony in town. My friends, the CMCs and all the school ponies, and lots more. We’ve all come to realize that you being a robot doesn’t matter, because you’re just like us at heart. I think Ponyville is better with you in it, Turing.”

“I think so too!” Pinkie exclaimed.

Twilight gave a start and glanced around, trying to locate her. Turing tapped her on the shoulder and pointed to Pinkie, who was floating above them via several balloons tied to her tail.

“Pinkie?” Twilight asked, raising an eyebrow and shielding her eyes against the sun as she peered upwards. “What are you doing up there?”

“I thought I’d try a new way of dropping party invitations!” she replied, pulling an envelope out of her poofy mane. “This way I can surprise everypony by dropping the invitations from the sky!”

“That is certainly unexpected, Pinkie Pie,” Turing said. “I was unable to detect you until you spoke. Have your efforts been successful?”

“Well, not as much as I hoped,” she admitted, rubbing the back of her neck. “Pegasus ponies make this flying thing look easy, but it’s actually a lot harder than I thou--whoa whoa whoa!” she cried as a gust of wind began to blow her in the wrong direction.

Twilight rolled her eyes and seized Pinkie with her magic, pulling her back to the ground and popping enough of the balloons to prevent her from flying off again.

“Whew! Thanks, Twilight!” Pinkie said. She turned back to Turing Test. “Anyway, Rinny, I think Twilight is right! Ponyville is always lots of fun, but you’ve made it even funner! Now I have another friend to hang out with, Applejack got her harvest in early, and Rarity says she’s working on a whole new clothing line with metallic tones ‘cause she says she was inspired by you! And DJ-Pon3 is doing lots of new music because she got inspired by you! And the Doc’s getting lots more business ever since he fixed you up! All over town, everypony’s talking about you! Not to mention that my sister Maud keeps mentioning you in her letters,” she added, wiggling her eyebrows slyly. “You charmer.”

“Ah. I… am glad to be held in such high esteem. It is so strange after being seen as an oddity for much of my existence. I am still unaccustomed to such acceptance. Do you both believe that my presence has improved things in Ponyville and beyond?”

“I absolutely do, Turing,” Twilight said, giving a decisive nod.

“Totally!” Pinkie cried, giving the mechanical mare a tight hug. “I wish we had more awesome robots like you around! Everything’s better with robots!”

Turing’s eyes shifted. “I… am not certain what to say.”

“Well, you can say that you’ll come to Gummy’s birthday party next week!” She gave her the envelope with the invitation and another to Twilight.

“Sure! It sounds fun!” Twilight said.

“And I will attend as well.”

“Great!” Pinkie exclaimed. “Oh, and let’s have another party for Rinny’s citizenship as soon as we can! And you two are coming to the picnic this afternoon, right?”

“We sure are!” Twilight said.

“Affirmative.”

“Then I’ll see you both there!” Pinkie said, and bounced off to deliver more invitations.

As they watched her go, waving goodbye, Turing turned to Twilight. “Twilight Sparkle, before Pinkie Pie interrupted us, there was something else I wished to ask you.”

“Oh? What is it?” she asked, facing her.

“You stated that you are proud of me. I am very glad, but I wonder if you are also disappointed with me.”

Twilight tilted her head. “Disappointed? No, of course not! Why would I be?”

Turing looked down. “I thought that perhaps you were bothered by the fact that I did not wish to remove you as my end user.”

“Oh, I see,” Twilight said. She furrowed her brow and rubbed her chin. “Well, I… no. No, I’m not disappointed. I think you’ll have to face it one day, and I just thought that maybe you were ready, but if you need more time, then you do. I guess I don’t know why it matters to you.”

“In truth, I am not certain either. I do not feel that you would restrain me against my will, nor do I doubt that I could act responsibly in the majority of situations, but many aspects of society and interaction with organics are still puzzling to me. I am not certain that I would be able to make the correct decisions without your guidance.”

“You can have my guidance whenever you want it, Turing, regardless of me being your end user.” She looked away. “And, um, I haven’t always made the right decisions for you, either. That time I made you follow the Three Laws of Automata was a pretty big disaster.”

“That is true. However, you have been extremely helpful to me. If it were not for you, I cannot imagine what sort of being I would be. I cannot imagine what my existence would be like without the friends you helped me make. Thank you for that, Twilight Sparkle.”

Twilight smiled and gave her a hug, which Turing returned. “You’re welcome, Turing,” Twilight said. “Just know that it wasn’t all one-sided. I learned a lot about friendship by seeing you develop and learn. It’s hard to imagine life without you too.”

Turing nodded, and Twilight released her.

“I am glad to hear that. However, there is one other reason.” She tapped her chin, considering how to articulate what she meant. “It may also be that it is my ‘nature,’ for lack of a better word, that, as a robot, I simply prefer to be commanded what to do. To be without an end user is a concept I find troubling, and I am not certain why.”

“Well, like I said, Turing,” Twilight replied, “we’re putting it all aside for now. Unless it’s something to protect you, I won’t order you to do anything you don’t want to do. As far as I’m concerned, you’re free to be your own pony. When you’re ready to make it official, just let me know, and I’ll honor that. You have my word.”

Turing bowed her head. “I will remember that, Twilight Sparkle.”

“Great!” Twilight said, grinning broadly. “Now, let’s go get some of the things for the picnic! I sure wouldn’t want to be late for it!”

***

On a grassy hill just outside of Ponyville, a blanket was spread, and various bowls, dishes, and baskets of food were placed upon it. Applejack had brought apple spice muffins, Rarity a platter of radish rosettes, Pinkie her cupcakes, Fluttershy a salad fresh from her garden, and Rainbow Dash a pitcher of fruit punch. They were all chatting, but the food remained untouched.

“Come on, come on,” Rainbow Dash grumbled. Her belly likewise growled as if to echo her sentiment. “What’s taking Twilight so long?”

“Yes, she is uncharacteristically late,” Rarity remarked. “You don’t suppose she forgot, do you?”

Applejack shook her head. “Nah. I’m sure there’s a reason.” Lying next to her on the blanket was Winona, whom she gave a soft pat on the head as the little canine eyed the food hungrily.

Just then, Winona raised her head, getting to her paws and barking excitedly.

“Well, speak o’ the devil,” Applejack chuckled, turning to see Twilight hurrying up the hill. Turing Test and Spike were right behind her.

“Sorry, sorry!” Twilight said, practically skidding to a halt as she arrived. “We got a little delayed!”

“We’re just glad you’re here,” Fluttershy said, smiling warmly. “Um, we were starting to worry, though.”

Pinkie bounced over to Twilight. “Ooh, what kept you? Princess stuff? Magic stuff? Magic princess stuff?”

“Uhh, something more mundane than that,” Twilight said, rolling her eyes.

Turing Test stepped forward, placing a hoof on her chest. “I apologize, but the fault was mine.” It was then that they noticed that she was carrying a basket on her back. Twilight levitated it over to them and placed it on the blanket.

“Ooh, you made something, Rinny?” Pinkie asked. “What is it, what is it?”

“That is actually the reason for our delay. I asked Twilight Sparkle that she allow me to prepare the dish that we would bring to this picnic. I decided to bring a salad, as many ponies seem to enjoy them. However, I was not certain if I should bring a vegetable salad, a fruit salad, a potato salad, or an egg salad. I reasoned that the best way to satisfy everypony’s tastes was to combine them all into one salad.”

All five of the others made faces of disgust.

Rainbow Dash started laughing. “Oh man, only you, Tee!”

“I submitted my dish to Twilight and Spike the Dragon. Twilight informed me that the various tastes together would be unpalatable, though only Spike the Dragon sampled it.”

They all looked to Spike.

He shrugged. “It wasn’t that bad. Uh, it could’ve used less ranch dressing. Or… apricots? Or eggs?”

Rarity nearly gagged. “Spikey Wikey, please! Maybe dragons have stronger tracts than ponies, but just the thought is making me ill!”

“The long and short is that we suggested that Turing try to make something else,” Twilight said. “Since she had to start over, that’s what held us up.”

“Thus, I prepared several tomato and cucumber sandwiches on whole wheat bread.” She pulled back the cloth covering the basket to reveal the sandwiches. “I hope you will enjoy them.”

They all shared a mutual sigh of relief.

“Well, enough yammerin’ about all this food! Let’s dig in!” Applejack declared.

She got no argument from the others.

As the hungry group filled their plates and glasses, chatting between bites, Turing sat by and watched them. Twilight noticed, raising an eyebrow.

“Um, Turing?” she whispered. “You’re staring again.”

“My apologies,” Turing whispered back. “I just enjoy watching you all eat. I wonder what all these foods taste like.”

“It’s just a little awkward,” Twilight muttered, taking a bite of her salad.

“Aw, don’t let it get to ya, Twilight,” Applejack said, waving a hoof. “I’d think you’d be used to it after livin’ with her fer so long.”

Twilight blushed; she hadn’t realized that Applejack had heard her. “W-well, I am, but I didn’t think you all were.”

“Doesn’t seem to be a problem. Besides, I personally got used to it after that time she helped us out on the farm.” She looked over at Turing Test and started to laugh.

“Have I done something amusing?” Turing asked.

“Sorry, sorry!” Applejack said, trying to stifle her chuckles. “It’s just that, well, the way yer lookin’ at everypony eat… it’s almost the same as the way Winona is!”

They all looked and saw that Winona was indeed eyeing them all from her spot near the picnic blanket, panting excitedly in the hopes that someone would drop some food.

Pinkie burst out laughing as well. “Ha ha ha! You’re right, Applejack! It’s the same expression!”

“Ah. I see.” She looked down at Winona. “Should I feed her something?”

“Nah, doubt there’s much here that she’d like anyway,” Applejack replied. “Not that she knows that.”

Winona smacked her lips and whined.

“Not that I’m objecting,” Rarity said, “but why did you bring her?”

“Oh, I just thought it might be fun to play a little catch after lunch,” Applejack replied.

Turing Test tapped her chin. “Since neither Winona nor I can partake in this meal, perhaps I could entertain her for a short time.”

Applejack smiled. “Sounds good to me! She has taken a shine to ya, after all.”

“I enjoy her company as well,” Turing said, stroking Winona’s back, causing the dog to stand up and wag her tail. “Winona, can you identify who is a good dog?”

Winona barked in response.

“Correct. I was referring to you.” She knelt and picked up a small stick. “Come with me, and I will throw this stick. Then you can catch it and return it to me. Then the process will repeat. Does that sound enjoyable?”

Winona barked again excitedly.

“Yes. I also enjoy repetitive tasks.”

She galloped off, Winona chasing behind her.

As Turing Test and Winona played nearby, the other friends chatted idly about recent events in their lives, such as Rarity and Applejack’s trip to Manehattan, Rainbow Dash and Scootaloo winning the Sisterhooves Social competition (with Applejack getting peeved at Dash’s teasing of Big Mac’s participation), Discord’s recent antics, talk about Cadance’s upcoming baby shower, and Pinkie Pie working on next month’s Helping Hooves Music Festival.

“I don’t wanna give anything away,” Pinkie said, practically biting her lip, “but I think I might have snagged a pretty big name singer to headline the event!”

“Oh yeah?” Twilight asked. “Who is it?”

“I’ll let you know if it works out,” Pinkie said, though she was obviously brimming with excitement and having trouble keeping her lips sealed.

“Well, um…” Rarity said, changing the subject, lest Pinkie spill the beans unwittingly, “I heard that you took Turing Test to sign her citizenship papers, Twilight.”

Twilight smiled. “That’s right! Turing is now officially a citizen of Ponyville and Equestria as a whole!”

“Awesome!” Rainbow Dash shouted, taking to the air. “Way to go, Tee!” she cried.

Turing Test was nearby, rubbing Winona’s belly. “Thank you,” she called back before trotting over to them once again. “There is no need to shout, however. I have been listening to your conversation. My auditory sensors are very efficient.” Her ears squeaked on their hinges as she twitched them demonstratively.

“She’s not kidding,” Spike laughed. “She hears everything that happens in the castle.”

“Correct. For instance, I once startled Spike the Dragon when I overheard him--”

“Hey hey hey, don’t tell them about that!” Spike cried, his purple cheeks flushing pink.

The others all laughed.

“So, Rinny, what are you going to do next?”

“Next?” She cocked her head to the side. “I will assist you in cleaning up after the picnic ends. Then Twilight Sparkle and Spike the Dragon and I will return home. Then--”

“No no no, not that! I mean now that you’re a citizen!”

Turing stared back at her.

“Um, I think she means,” Fluttershy said, speaking up, “that we all want to know if there’s anything you want to do now that you couldn’t do earlier.”

“I see.” She tapped her chin metallically. “I have not considered that question in much depth. I am aware of my new rights and privileges, but I have no immediate plans to exercise them.”

“Aw, c’mon!” Rainbow Dash groaned. “There’s gotta be something you want to do. Ooh, like buy yourself some hard cider! Or watch an R-rated movie without an adult!”

“But I am incapable of drinking hard cider. Also, most of my friends are adults, so going without them would imply going alone. However, I could accompany one of my younger friends. Perhaps the Crusaders--”

“No,” Applejack and Rarity said in unison.

“Eh, you can take Scootaloo if you want,” Rainbow Dash said, shrugging. “It’s not like I haven’t already, though.”

“Rainbow!” Twilight gasped. “I hope you got permission to do that!”

“Of course! Scootaloo said it was okay.”

“That’s not what I meant!” Twilight shouted, causing the others to chuckle.

“I wrote a script for an action movie once,” Pinkie said, raising her hoof. “I’d be the star! And I’d save a bunch of ponies from a building that were being held hostage by terrorists with funny accents! Gummy would play the villain, Hans Gummer, and the whole thing would take place at Hearth’s Warming! I call it: Pie Hard!”

They all stared at her in stunned silence.

“Sssooo, anyway,” Rainbow Dash continued, “there’s gotta be something else you want to do, Tee.”

“Well, she can vote,” Twilight suggested. “Um, but the next election isn’t for another two years.”

“Ugh, no, I mean something cool!”

“Oh oh oh oh oh!” Pinkie exclaimed, her eyes lighting up. “She could get ma~aried!”

Twilight blushed, and Spike spit out his drink.

Turing Test looked to her friends, who were all staring at her.

“I had not considered that possibility. However, I am not ready for such a commitment. Though, if you are suggesting that I wed your sister, I am happy that you are supportive of such an idea and that you would accept me as a sister-in-law.”

“Shucks,” Pinkie said, her ears drooping. “Oh well! I guess I’ll have to wait a little longer to have a robot-in-law.”

“Too bad,” Rainbow Dash said. “But hey, if you and Maud ever do get hitched, I was wondering: would your kids be earth ponies or robots? Or half-robots, half-ponies?”

The group went dead silent. Fluttershy turned to Rainbow with glacial slowness, her jaw dropping.

“W-what? What’d I say?” Rainbow Dash demanded, looking to each of them.

“Moving on,” Rarity said hurriedly, “I suppose there’s the possibility of a job. Have you considered finding work?”

Turing nodded. “Yes. In fact, I have already agreed to assist the mayor with her records next week.”

“That sounds nice,” Fluttershy said, smiling. “But, um, what will you do with your money?”

“I have not decided,” Turing Test replied. “As a robot, I do not require the things ponies commonly use money for. I do not need food, water, or a bed. Perhaps I could pay rent to compensate Twilight Sparkle for sheltering me.”

Twilight waved a hoof. “No, no, Turing Test. I’m your guardian now, not your landlady. You don’t need to pay me to live in the castle. We have plenty of room, and your room is tiny anyway.”

“Then I suppose I will use any money I earn on necessities and gifts for my friends and save the rest. Since I will not spend my money on food or housing, perhaps I can use some of it for charity. If I can help to care for ponies as I have been cared for, then I believe that would be an appropriate use of my earnings.”

The others nodded approvingly.

“I think that’s a fine idea, darling,” Rarity said, putting her hoof on Turing’s shoulder.

“Likewise,” Applejack said, taking off her hat to scratch her head. “Aw, what the heck. Lemme help you get started, Turing Test. Why don’t you come to the farm tomorrow and help us bring in some of the early harvest? I pay by the bushel, so that ought to add up, as fast as you work.”

Rarity beamed. “What a splendid idea, Applejack!”

Twilight gasped. “Applejack,” she breathed, “you’d really do that?”

“Oh, don’t go lookin’ at me like that,” she said, rolling her eyes as she replaced her hat. “I’m over all that stuff I was dealin’ with last time. I ain’t got no problem with a friend helpin’ me out on the farm, robot or not.” She held out her hoof to Turing Test. “Whaddya say?”

Turing looked at Applejack’s hoof, then over to Twilight.

“Like I said earlier, Turing, it’s up to you!” Twilight said.

“Acknowledged.” She took Applejack’s hoof and shook it. “I accept, Applejack. Thank you very much for your offer. I will not disappoint you.”

“I don’t reckon ya will,” she said, grinning as she tipped her hat.

***

Once the picnic ended, they all packed up their things, bid each other farewell, and went home.

“Did you have fun today, Turing Test?” Spike asked as they made their way back through Ponyville to the castle.

“Affirmative. It has been some time since I was able to spend time with all of our close friends. Though I wish I was able to enjoy the food, I have developed an appreciation for spending time in idle conversation and sharing details from each other’s lives.”

Twilight chuckled.

“Did I say something amusing, Twilight Sparkle?”

“Oh, no, it’s just,” she paused, smiling, “what you said reminds me a little of how much I’ve changed since coming to Ponyville. Back before I made all my friends, I used to think spending my time just talking about silly, non-important things was mostly a waste of time. Even if it was fun, I felt guilty for not spending my time studying.”

“She’s not kidding,” Spike said with a chuckle. “One time she spent two hours with Minuette, Twinkleshine, and Lemon Hearts at the donut shop. That was a record for her, but when she saw how much time had passed, she freaked out and ran off without even paying her share of the bill!”

Twilight gawked at him. “I did?! Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Minuette told me about it later on. I took a little bit out of your change jar to pay her back. She said not to tell you, though, because she didn’t want you to feel guilty. But I figure it’s been a long time.”

Twilight blushed. “Well, I guess that’s just how the old me was.”

“And the new you is a better friend. When I visited your Canterlot friends during Hearth’s Warming, they all spoke highly of you. In particular, your friend Moon Dancer was grateful to you for your friendship.” Then, to Twilight’s surprise, Turing actually nuzzled her cheek against her. “And so am I.”

“Aww!” Twilight giggled, both because of the gesture and because Turing’s metal cheek was a little cold to the touch. “Well, let’s get home and check the mail. I want to see if we got a response from Gadget about when she can visit next. Oh, and Dr. Turing says that his article about you will be published in this month’s issue of Scientific Equestrian! Maybe the issue is out already!”

“I look forward to reading both,” Turing said, and eagerly picked up her pace.

***

That night, under a moon partly obscured by clouds, a train departed. It trundled along through valleys, around mountains, and through forests. The light from the engine cut through the darkness, reflecting back from the eyes of nocturnal creatures. Farmers and villagers stirred in their sleep, hearing the unexpected train roll by so late at night. A select few graveyard shift workers who spotted the train noted the lack of markings, and the fact that it only had a few cars. Some of them ignored it. Some had been paid to ignore it.

The train moved slowly, discreetly, along twisting tracks, slipping in between regularly scheduled trains. Like a phantom, it was there and gone without anypony giving it a second thought, assuming they’d ever had a first thought.

It rolled onward toward its destination. It would be there the next morning. It would slow down to park itself just outside the village.

Just outside Ponyville.

***

The early spring harvest was decidedly different from when Turing had helped in autumn. Rather than bucking apples, Applejack told her, they’d be harvesting some radishes, lettuce, and peas alongside Big Mac. These fields were much smaller than the long corn fields or expansive acres of apple trees that she’d seen before, and she had to be shown how to properly remove the crops, pack them into bushels, and cart them back to the barn. Applejack had stated that such crops were a great way to pad out their profits before the first apple harvest.

The radishes were easy by any standard, doubly so for a robot. With her magic, Turing pulled up each radish one-by-one, quickly clearing all of her field except for a small portion that Applejack had said was going to be used for seeds. Those would sit in the ground longer.

The lettuce wasn’t much more difficult. Applejack showed her how to gently push back the leaves and use a small knife to cut the heads off at the soil level. With speed and absolute precision, those were soon done too.

The peas took the longest, Turing found, but were still nothing to worry about. She cut the small pods off each plant until she’d filled her basket with them, then carted them back to the barn. Granny Smith and Apple Bloom were back at the house, sorting and boxing the vegetables to get them ready for storage or the market.

By eleven o’clock, the work was done.

“Hoowee, Turing! I didn’t think even you could get all this done so fast!” Applejack said as they packed up the last basket. “When we head back, we’ll take a tally and settle up yer pay.”

“Thank you, Applejack. I am glad that we were able to help each other.”

“Shucks, what’re friends for?” she asked.

“Manual labor,” Turing replied. When Applejack gave her a weird look, she leaned forward, adding, “That was a joke. Ha ha.”

“Heh! Ya got me!”

They packed up their carts one last time and began the trek back to the farm, passing by the rows of apple trees which were just beginning to blossom. Applejack slowed down as she peered down the shady corridor.

“Hey, hold up there, Turing.”

The mechanical mare did so, and glanced over at Applejack.

“Hey, follow me fer a second. I got somethin’ I wanna show ya.”

Turing unhooked herself from the cart and followed Applejack into the trees. They arrived at a small clearing. There didn’t seem to be anything notable about the area. There were no stumps, no old trees, nor anything else that marked the area as special.

“You don’t remember this place, do ya?” Applejack said, watching as Turing looked around.

“Remember it?” She tapped her chin. “I remember everything. And yet, I do not know this place. If you are stating that I have been here, then…” Suddenly, it dawned on her. “This clearing is where Apple Bloom and her friends discovered me. Am I correct?”

“Got it in one!” Applejack chuckled. She tapped a spot on the ground with her hoof. “It was right here. Looks like the old, burnt grass is completely gone. Ya’d never know anything had happened here at all.”

Turing looked down at the grassy spot. It was indeed unremarkable. And yet, this single spot was where she’d been found. That had led to her being recovered and given to Twilight. Had none of those things happened, her life might have been totally different. This point, this spot, was the place where the pony she had once been ceased to be, and the pony she was now had begun her existence.

She crouched and lay down on the grass.

“Hey, uh… this ain’t the time for a nap, ya know,” Applejack said, chuckling nervously. When Turing didn’t respond, she furrowed her brow. “Um… you okay?”

“It is strange,” Turing said. “I feel… something. This place is giving me an emotional response, but I am uncertain how I should define it.”

“Jeez, I… I’m sorry if it bothers ya. Maybe I shouldn’t have shown ya this.”

“No,” Turing said quickly. “I am glad that you did. This feeling… it is not unpleasant. Perhaps later, I will identify it.”

Then her ears twitched, and she looked to her right. She got to her hooves rapidly.

“You ready to go?”

“Applejack, please be quiet.”

“Huh?” She strained her ears but heard nothing. “Something wrong?” she whispered.

Turing stepped forward, tensing up. She held up a hoof. “Applejack, please get behind me.”

“What? What’re you--”

“Now, please.”

Applejack gulped and did as Turing asked. At first, she wondered what could have put Turing Test so on edge. Perhaps a strange animal had wandered in from the Everfree.

But then she heard it. A rhythmic, familiar whirring sound accompanied by a series of thumps. It was getting louder.

Something was coming.

Something that made a mechanical sound, very similar to Turing when she walked.

There was movement behind the trees. It was coming at them at an even pace. The metallic exterior became visible. As it came into view, she caught a glimpse of its face, noting the glowing blue eyes.

It came through the trees and stepped into the clearing at last. The whole world seemed to go silent as Turing and the intruder locked eyes.

It was another robot. This one resembled Turing with its metallic exterior and brass hooves and the black rubber around its joints. But this thing was much larger, enough to even dwarf Big McIntosh. Unlike Turing, who had a rounder face and legs, this machine was angular, with a narrow muzzle that terminated in a grated speaker. Unlike Turing’s big, round purple eyes, the new robot had narrow, rectangular eyes that glowed blue. Its mane and tail were thinner, more bristly. The low electrical hum from it was a lower pitch than Turing’s as well, and in the silence that ensued, only those electric hums could be heard.

It spoke: “You are Unit 003M.” Its voice, while having the same artificial quality as Turing's, was much deeper and more masculine.

Turing nodded slowly. “That is my designation,” she replied. “Please identify yourself.”

“I am designated Unit 004S.”

The words hung in the air. Turing raised her head slightly. And Applejack simply stared on, her throat feeling dry, as she waited to see what happened next.

To be continued…

Steam Machine

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Turing raised her head slightly, looking up at the towering mechanical creature before her.

“Zero zero… four,” she said, echoing his name slowly.

“Correct,” he replied, his deep, metallic voice echoing in the still clearing between the apple trees.

“Your similar design features likely mean that you were created by the same ponies who created me. Furthermore, since you are given the subsequent designation ‘S,’ you are classified as male. Am I correct?”

“Affirmative.”

Applejack swallowed but kept silent as the two continued speaking to each other.

Turing’s ears perked up and she put a hoof to her chest. “Then you are,” she said as excitement crept into her voice, “my brother!”

004 tilted his head slightly. Applejack instantly recognized how similarly he made the gesture compared to Turing Test.

“That analogy is accurate,” he rumbled.

Turing turned to face Applejack. “Applejack, did you hear him? This is my brother. My little brother!”

Applejack raised an eyebrow. “He ain’t exactly what I’d call ‘little,’” she said slowly. “And, uh, not to put a worm in yer apple, but I think ya might not be readin’ the situation very well. I don’t think he’s here for a family reunion.”

Turing’s ears twitched. “Perhaps you are correct, Applejack,” she said, turning back to face 004. “However, I cannot deny that I am experiencing strong emotions of happiness and excitement.”

She stepped closer to him.

“Brother, I am very happy to meet you. You are the first robot other than myself that I have encountered. Furthermore, I have desired a family for a long time. Now that you are here, I realize that I am not the only machine of my kind.”

004 only stared down at her. “There are others.”

Turing’s eyes constricted. “You mean that there are other robots like ourselves? How many?”

“That information is classified.”

Applejack cleared her throat, causing both robots to look at her. “L-look here, you!” she said, pointing a hoof at him. “Now, if yer one o’ my friends’ kin, then yer welcome to stay, but first I wanna know what yer here for!”

Turing looked back at 004. “I am also curious about that. Brother, why have you come here?”

“Objective one… that information is classified.”

“Objective one?” Applejack repeated. She furrowed her brow.

“Objective two: retrieve automaton Unit 003M.”

Applejack stepped forward. “Hey now, you can’t--”

But Turing held up a hoof, cutting her off. “It is all right, Applejack,” she said, keeping her gaze focused on 004. “I will deal with this matter and speak for myself.”

To 004, she said, “Brother, why are you to retrieve me?”

“That information is classified.”

“What do our creators intend to do with me once I have been retrieved?”

“That information is classified.”

Turing tapped her chin. “Can you inform me of what my original purpose was when I was sent to Ponyville seeking Twilight Sparkle?”

“That information--”

“Is classified, we get it!” Applejack groaned, rubbing her temples.

“Correct.”

Turing Test took a step back. “Is your intent to harm my friends or other ponies?”

“Negative.”

Applejack blinked. “Well… that’s good, I guess.”

“Clarifying: my objectives are to be achieved without causing injury to citizens, if possible.”

Turing Test and Applejack both noted the “if possible” at the end of that statement.

“Brother,” Turing Test stated, “I do not wish to return with you. I wish to stay here.”

“Irrelevant,” he said. “You will return with me. Compliance is compulsory.”

Turing spread her legs slightly, lowering her head. “And if I resist you physically?”

He was silent for a moment. Then he assumed the same stance as she. “Compliance is compulsory.”

“W-wait, hold on, now!” Applejack cried, rushing forward waving her hooves. “Listen, ya big lug! You said that you weren’t supposed to hurt citizens, right? Well, Turing Test… er, 003, or whatever, is a citizen! That means you can’t hurt her, right?”

He raised his head. “Confirm: Unit 003M is a legal citizen of Equestria?”

Applejack took off her hat and placed it over her heart. “It’s true. They just made it official yesterday.”

“She is correct, Brother,” Turing said, relaxing her stance as she placed a hoof on her chest. “I am a citizen now. I have a life in Ponyville. I do not wish to leave it, nor do I wish to fight you.”

004 looked from one to the other. “Analyzing… probability of veracity is 94%. Unit 003M is designated a citizen of Equestria.”

Applejack noted that he had not relaxed his stance.

He turned to face Turing again. “You will not comply voluntarily?”

Turing Test shook her head. “I will not go with you. Please, Brother,” she said, holding out her hoof to him, “come with me. Perhaps I can show you what I have--”

“Analysis of situation complete,” he said, cutting her off. “Unit 003M is classified as a citizen. Objective two states that Unit 003M must be retrieved without fail. Objectives are to be achieved without causing injury to citizens, if possible. Unit 003M cannot be retrieved through voluntary submission and can only be retrieved by force. Therefore, it is not possible to achieve my objectives without injuring Unit 003M. Use of force is acceptable.”

Applejack opened her mouth to say something, and Turing moved to reassume her stance, but there was a gray blur as 004 suddenly rushed forward. There was a loud clang of metal against metal as he struck Turing with his hoof, tossing her against a nearby apple tree, splintering the wood and cracking the trunk.

She quickly righted herself and got to her hooves, but he was already on her again. With a kick of his massive foreleg, he sent her flying into the air to land somewhere beyond the trees.

“Turing!” Applejack screamed. She ran through the trees. She saw that Turing Test had landed on the dirt road just a few meters ahead of the carts they had been pulling only a few minutes prior.

The mechanical mare got to her hooves as Applejack ran to her side.

“Turing! Are you okay?” she asked, putting a hoof on her shoulder.

“No significant damage detected,” she replied.

There was a sound, and they saw 004 slowly making his way through the trees. He did not seem to be in any hurry, Applejack noted, which did nothing to make her feel better. There was a certain assuredness to his gait; it was slow, but deliberate.

Inevitable.

“Applejack,” Turing whispered to her. “I apologize, but I must ask you to find assistance. I will attempt to subdue or otherwise occupy my brother until you return.”

Applejack was about to protest, but then she realized that a monster that could move that fast and with that kind of power would be more than a match for her. She swallowed hard and nodded.

“I’ll come back as quick as I can!” she said. “But…” She paused, her eyes shifting over to 004 as he continued strolling toward them. “Can ya really take this guy on? Do ya think you can beat ‘im?”

Turing’s ears flattened. “Applejack,” she said, her voice even and stern, “I do not like to lie to my friends. Please leave and get help quickly.”

Applejack bit her lip, hesitating for a moment, but then nodded and dashed off, heading up the road to warn her family before going to seek her friends.

Turing turned slightly to watch her go before turning back to face 004.

“Brother, please cease your attack. I realize that you are subject to your programming, but perhaps we can determine a nonviolent solution to this conflict.”

“Negative.” He turned his head and watched as Applejack ran. “Pony identified as ‘Applejack’ is retreating. She is seeking assistance.”

Turing nodded. “Despite their individual weakness, together my friends are formidable. I have no desire to see you harmed. Please surrender, or you may be in danger.”

But 004 made no move to surrender or pursue Applejack. He only turned back to face Turing.

“Current situation is acceptable.”

She raised her head, her ears twitching. If he is attempting to subdue me, she said to herself, then interference from my friends would impede that goal. Why would he be in favor of Applejack seeking assistance? Then her eyes constricted as a thought occurred to her. It is possible that he wants my friends to all be in the same place. That may pertain to his first objective. By attempting to assist me, my friends may be at risk. I must either warn them, subdue Unit 004, or convince him to surrender before they arrive.

She activated her E-Mode, and the pistons in her legs engaged. She sprang at him and levelled a kick at his head. Her hoof struck him along the side of his long muzzle with a loud clang, snapping his head back and causing him to stumble back momentarily. As soon as she’d caught him off guard, she whipped around and took off up the road.

With her extreme speed, she was kicking up dust and dirt as she rocketed after Applejack. But only a moment after she’d begun to run, she heard 004 galloping behind her.

“Engaging E-Mode.”

The sound of his pistons engaging was followed by the rapidly intensifying sound of his hooves pounding the ground as he chased her. And they got very loud very quickly.

She turned and looked over her shoulder and saw that he’d already caught up to her.

Before she could react further, he tackled her, sending her tumbling head over hooves on the ground. And yet, before she’d even come to a stop, he swiftly ran at her and gave her another mighty kick that sent her flying.

***

Big Mac was chewing idly on a stem of wheat as he leaned against the barn and waited for his sister and Turing Test to return with the last haul of the day when he heard the commotion. Echoing out over the hills, he heard a loud but distant clang. Birds flew from their perches in the apple trees at the sound. He frowned and moved away from the barn, squinting as he peered at a hill in the distance. It was then that he saw Applejack galloping toward him.

“Big Mac!” she shouted, running right at him.

He spat out the wheat stem and raised an eyebrow.

“Listen close! There’s another robot! It’s Turing’s brother, an’ he’s attackin’ her! I’m gonna get my friends to help! You get Apple Bloom an’ Granny Smith an’ keep ‘em safe, ya hear?”

“Eeyup!” he said, giving a quick, firm nod.

As Applejack ran toward Ponyville, he went back to the barn.

“Apple Bloom, Granny!” he hollered. “Get in the house!”

Apple Bloom was idly jumping between two hay bales while Granny Smith was rechecking her math on a tally sheet when he burst in. They both looked at him in confusion.

“I mean it, trouble’s comin’!” he shouted.

They both began to move, with Big Mac scooping Granny Smith onto his back (the old mare giving a quick yelp of surprise and protest as he did so) and ushering them both to the house.

“Big Mac, what is it?” Apple Bloom asked, looking over her shoulder, her eyes wide and fearful.

Big Mac ignored the question and practically shoved them both inside the house. As he did so, however, he heard another loud clang and Apple Bloom cried out, pointing her hoof in the air as she spotted something. He turned to look.

Turing Test was flying head over hooves as if lobbed from a catapult. She sailed through the air in an arc before coming down and crashing through the roof of the barn. A cloud of wood, hay, and shingles erupted outward.

“Turing!” Apple Bloom screamed as she moved for the barn.

“Nope!” Big Mac said, holding her back. “Granny, hold ‘er!”

“A-all right,” she replied, holding the protesting little filly. Then she saw Big Mac going for the barn instead. “Big Mac, you be careful now!”

“Eeyup!” he called back, running to the barn.

Inside, Turing Test was getting to her hooves, shaking the debris from the barn’s roof - as well as the remains of the vegetables that had broken her fall - off her hull.

“Turing Test!” he said, helping her up. “You all right?”

She stood, then nodded. “I have only sustained cosmetic damage to my hull. All systems appear to be functional.”

There was a loud clattering sound and they both turned to see the massive frame of 004 blocking the door.

Big Mac kept his eyes focused on the hulking robot. “Yer brother?” he asked.

“Affirmative.”

Big Mac placed himself between Turing Test and 004.

“Big McIntosh, please allow me to handle this matter alone,” she said, a hint of panic to her synthetic voice.

“Nope,” he shot back, stepping closer to 004.

“Be advised,” 004 said, remaining still as a statue, “that no interference will be tolerated. You will remove yourself from this situation immediately.”

He shook his head. “Nope.”

“Big McIntosh,” Turing said, trying to step around him, “there is no need to--”

“Go catch up to Applejack an’ find yer friends,” he said, stomping his hoof and pawing at the ground as he glared at 004, never taking his eyes off him. “Just fly off an’ I can hold ‘im--”

“Big McIntosh, I cannot fly. My P-Mode was damaged in my recent accident.”

Big Mac blinked, then swallowed. “Then run.”

“You cannot--”

“I ain’t gonna ask twice,” he said, turning ever so slightly to give her a smirk.

Turing was silent for a moment, but then she bowed her head. “Acknowledged,” she replied. Having no other exit, she turned and dashed straight through the back of the barn, breaking through the wall.

004 moved to pursue, but Big Mac managed to get in front of him, placing his hooves on 004’s shoulders, barely holding him back.

“You will move. This is your final warning.”

“Nope!” he said through gritted teeth. “Look here, you. Yer causin’ trouble on my family’s farm, yer scarin’ my sister an’ my granny, an’ yer hurtin’ my friend. An’ in case ya didn’t know,” he said, cracking a smile in spite of himself, “good brothers ain’t s’posed to hit their sisters. Why don’t ya just stop what yer doin’ an’--”

The movement was swift. 004 simply gave a quick kick to Big Mac’s chest, as if lightly passing a hoofball, but there was a dry snap and Big Mac’s eyes went wide. His words became a choking gasp, and his eyes bulged as the pain hit him. He clutched his chest and fell to the ground with a groan.

“Impediment neutralized. Resuming pursuit.”

004 sprang forward and smashed through the hole Turing Test had just made.

A few moments later, Apple Bloom and Granny Smith peeked into the barn. When Apple Bloom saw Big Mac lying on the ground, she screamed and ran to him.

“Big Mac! Big Mac! Oh my gosh, are you all right?!”

“Eey--” He winced, sucking his breath in through his teeth. “N… nope,” he said. “Rib’s cracked.”

“Dang it, Big Mac!” Granny Smith shouted. “Why’d you have to--” Then she paused, bit her lip, and knelt down, patting him on the head. “Oh, never mind. We’ll get ya mended up.”

Big Mac gave a look around the barn, which now had a massive hole in the roof and another in the back wall, not to mention some smashed up crates of vegetables.

“Barn needs mendin’ too,” he said, managing a chuckle through the pain.

***

Turing was nearly to Ponyville. Far in the distance, across the town, she could see Twilight’s castle. She still wasn’t certain if she should have left Big Mac, but since 004 had seemed reluctant to attack organic ponies, perhaps everything was fine. Just the same, she wanted to resolve this and see if Big Mac was all right as soon as possible.

Then she heard the now-familiar gallop and the sound of machinery. 004 was chasing her and gaining. She calculated that he would overcome her long before she reached Twilight or anypony else.

Analyzing situation… direct combat is inadvisable, as he is much stronger and faster than I. Optimal solution determined: attempt to elude 004 rather than outrunning or confronting him.

As she approached the outside of the village, rather than taking the shortest route to the castle, she veered to her right and ran at a nearby cottage. With her speed and the extra power in her legs, she leaped over the cottage and landed in an alley on the other side. She knew the exact layout of Ponyville and thus was able to dart down the alley, making twists and turns as she moved nimbly between houses and the backs of shops, weaving between surprised bystanders as she made a convoluted path through the town.

At last, she came to a halt in a side road near Quills and Sofas. She stood perfectly still save for her ears, which she barely raised. Boosting power to her auditory systems, she listened for any sound that 004 might still be approaching.

There was nothing. She suddenly wished she was capable of sighing in relief.

Then there was a flash in front of her and 004 appeared in a burst of magic.

She leaped back at the sight and instantly spotted the goldenrod-colored artificial horn extending from his forehead.

“Target located,” he said, looking down at her.

“I see that you are capable of using magic, Brother,” Turing surmised.

“Affirmative. I lacked the mobility to adequately pursue you on hoof. Damaging civilian domiciles to continue was deemed inefficient and likely to cause injuries.”

“You considered going directly through the buildings to follow me?”

“Correct. The potential for injury and undetected obstacles was too great.”

Turing counted herself lucky that her plan hadn’t inadvertently resulted in 004 crashing through ponies’ homes to get to her. Still, she couldn’t risk doing that again. She needed a strategy.

“How were you able to locate me?” she asked.

“My ocular sensors are equipped to detect the unique magical signature created when you engage E-Mode. Auditory scans indicated that you had ceased movement. I then engaged U-Mode and teleported directly to you.”

He stepped toward her.

“Evasion is impossible. I will find you, regardless of any attempts at distraction or evasion. You will shut down immediately and submit yourself for retrieval.”

Turing lowered her head. “Understood,” she said quietly. “Commencing shutdown in 3… 2… 1…”

She shot forward, aiming a hoof at his neck, hoping to land a blow hard enough to disrupt his systems.

His massive hoof was up in an instant, blocking her as she collided into it face first and collapsed to the ground.

“You attempted to deceive me. Unexpected.”

Turing began to sit up, but he was on her again, stomping his hoof down on her chest, forcing her to the ground. He pressed his weight down on her before stomping again.

Warning: structural damage detected. Exterior hull dented. Chassis has received minor fractures.

He is going to crush me!

She raised her hooves and tried to block him as he stomped down a third time. And yet even with all four legs, it took considerable effort to push him back.

His strength has not decreased despite entering U-Mode. If he is like me, then he would have deactivated E-Mode when he changed modes. However, his speed and strength appear to be unchanged. The only explanation is…

“You are able to utilize multiple modes at once,” she observed, finally pushing him back. She sprang to her hooves as he regained his balance. “How is this possible? Your mane is less voluminous than my own; you should be generating too much heat to operate efficiently.”

“Our creators have improved on their previous designs. My size allows for expanded internal cooling mechanisms that allow me to access both modes simultaneously without risking damage, unlike you. Now venting excess heat.”

Turing watched as the metal plates around his legs, neck, and muzzle all rose slightly. With a hiss, steam briefly puffed out in thin jets before the plates went back in place.

“Ah. I see.”

“Your abilities are insufficient to overcome mine. Surrender.”

He was right. At first, her goal had been to simply last long enough for her friends to arrive and help to defeat him. Now she knew he wanted them to come, but she was less certain that she could get away from him to warn them.

He would get what he wanted from her friends, and then he would take her back, and she would never see them again.

Her eyes constricted. “Brother, there must be an acceptable course of action other than violence. I do not want you to harm me. I do not want you to harm my friends. And… I do not wish to harm you.” She placed a hoof to her chest. “Brother… please. I am afraid.”

“Impossible. You are an automaton. Automata do not possess emotions.”

She shook her head. “You are wrong, Brother. I have experienced them for myself. Perhaps if we can postpone this battle, I can assist you with experiencing them as well.”

She stepped toward him, reaching for him with one hoof, but his horn began to glow as he lowered his head.

“You are faulty. You will be retrieved and returned to a functional state.”

She shrank from him, feeling a powerful urge to run, even though she knew it would be useless.

But then she heard a sound, and they both turned to see a few ponies appearing from the alley. Turing Test recognized the owner of Quills and Sofas and Amethyst Star and many others. Coming to the head of the crowd were Lyra and Bon Bon.

“Turing?” Bon Bon asked, raising an eyebrow. “We all heard the noise. What’s--” Then she finally spotted 004. Her eyes went wide. “Oh.”

Lyra gasped when she saw the scuffs on Turing’s hull and the way her barrel was dented and slightly contorted. “Oh my gosh, Turing Test, you’re hurt!” She began to run over to her.

“Lyra, do not come any closer!” Turing shouted, halting her in her tracks. “This is 004. He has come to retrieve me, and he is very formidable. You must all leave here or risk injury to yourselves.”

The ponies nearby all muttered amongst themselves. Some of them began to back away, ears flat as they eyed the larger robot fearfully.

Lyra, however, was having none of it. She stood firm and raised her head, staring hard at him. “Listen you!” she shouted. “Turing Test is our friend! Nopony, robot or not, is going to take her anywhere! We’ll stop you ourselves if we have to.”

“Threat detected,” 004 rumbled.

A small blast of magic shot forth from his horn, zapping Lyra on her left foreleg and causing the bystanders to shout in surprise. Lyra cried out in pain when she was struck and fell to the ground.

“Threat neutralized.”

“Lyra!” Bon Bon screamed, instantly rushing to her friends side. She saw that the fur on her leg was slightly burnt. It wasn’t major, but she could tell it must hurt, a fact that was driven home by Lyra’s pained expression and the small sounds she was making. Bon Bon looked up at 004, gritting her teeth.

“You monster! Why did you do that?!”

“No further impediments will be tolerated.” His horn began to glow again.

“Brother, stop!” Turing cried, leaping in front of Bon Bon protectively. “There is no need to harm anypony.”

“Incorrect. Comply and there will be no further need.”

“I…” She flattened her ears and looked behind her to see that Bon Bon was helping Lyra to stand. “Bon Bon, please remove yourself and Lyra from danger. I will protect you.”

“But who’s going to protect you?” Bon Bon demanded.

“I will defend myself if I must,” Turing said. “Go now. Please.”

“I… fine,” she said, moving away with Lyra. “But I promise that I’ll get help!”

“That would be appreciated,” she said, locking eyes with 004.

The larger robot continued to stare back at her. “Civilians no longer present. Submit now or other ponies may become injured, similar to the unicorn mare and earth pony stallion.”

She raised her head. “You injured Big McIntosh?”

“Affirmative. His interference could not be tolerated. He was disabled without major injury. Surrender or more severe injuries may occur.”

Her fear subsided. In its place was something else. Something she’d only felt a few times before, but she knew it in an instant, and it was growing.

Rage.

Brother or not, this dangerous interloper was attacking her town, and her friends, and threatening to take her away. Was she not a citizen? Had she not earned her place in Ponyville? Who was he to take that away?

She crouched, ready to move in an instant. Analyzing possible weaknesses… 004 possesses greater speed and strength than I and is able to use magic simultaneously. However, his larger size means that he will be less agile and have greater difficulty guarding himself from attack. Focusing attacks on his joints would be optimal, as would avoiding his front, since he is best able to observe and defend himself.

I must literally kick his flank.

Turing ran at him again, and he prepared another beam of magic, but this time she sprang backwards at the last moment, then veered to her left, zig-zagging erratically. He began to turn, but she saw he was having difficulty following her.

She bolted forward and delivered a powerful buck with both of her back hooves into his side, the sound of metal striking against metal ringing out over the street. He was thrown off balance, so she jumped below him and struck at the back of the joints in his forelegs, causing him to lose his footing. She dashed out of the way before he fell onto her and then whirled around to see him topple over with a loud crash.

Her strategy had worked! She had calculated which attacks would be most likely to succeed and then deliberately chosen something else. As a robot, the idea of doing something less than optimal would seem crazy, which is why she knew that 004 would not see it coming. Now that he was vulnerable, if she could just damage him enough to disable him or render him nonfunctional, then she might be able to succeed!

She leaped into the air, preparing to bring her back hoof down where his head met his neck. A good blow to that would sever the wires to his optical and auditory systems.

Her hoof came down…

...only to be blocked by a shield spell 004 had raised at the last moment.

Ah. He is capable of shield spells.

She sprang off it before it vanished, but he fired a beam at her, sending her careening through the air. Before she hit the ground, he had already dashed below her. He raised a back hoof, aiming it at her as she came down.

She tried to raise her forelegs to guard her face at the last moment, but it was too late.

He kicked with all his might, and the massive hoof smashed into her head like a freight train. The sheer force of the attack sent her rocketing into the sky, flying high over Ponyville. Her systems were already giving her warnings about the severe damage she’d sustained, but she could only focus on the town below her. Before gravity took hold, she saw dozens of ponies on the ground looking up at her, pointing and gasping in awe, surprise, and fear.

Oh, Twilight Sparkle, she wondered to herself, what will I do now?

She began to fall.

***

“Ouch,” Lyra said as Bon Bon led her away.

“There there, Lyra,” Bon Bon said softly, nuzzling her with her cheek, “I’ll get you some help.” As she did so, however, she kept looking over her shoulder, biting her lip.

Lyra sighed, but gave her a patient smile. “Bon Bon, I know you want to help her,” she said. “So do that. I’ll get to the hospital on my own.”

Bon Bon gawked at her. “What? No! I can’t just leave you when you’re hurt!”

“It’s - ow - it’s not that bad,” she said, slipping from Bon Bon’s grasp, lifting her foreleg off of her with her magic. She took a few tender steps on her own to show her. “See?” she asked, though she was still barely masking her expression of pain.

“Turing is… she can handle herself…”

“Are you sure? Because that other robot looked pretty tough, and if somepony doesn’t help her, she’s going to end up in a lot worse shape than I am. Besides,” she chuckled, raising an eyebrow, “if you don’t help, I know you’ll go crazy. You go do your thing, while I go see the doctor.”

Bon Bon smiled. “All right. Don’t push yourself, okay?” She gave Lyra a quick hug before galloping away.

I need my supplies. I have some back at home, but that might not be enough. It might take more than just me helping to fight.

Then, as she ran, something Lyra had said struck her. “See the doctor… the doctor… the Doctor!”

***

She came down like a meteor, smashing into the ground with enough force to leave an impact crater, and she rolled and tumbled before coming to a stop.

Additional error messages blared in her head.

Exterior hull damaged. Faceplate damaged. Wires 1 and 3a in vocal system have been disconnected or are inoperable; communication may be compromised. Visor damaged. Major damage to ocular systems; right eye is nonfunctional. Right foreleg and left hind leg are damaged; movement compromised. Errors in mode switch detected; E-Mode has been disengaged. Minor thaumatrium leak detected in magic systems; magic system functional; repair required.

She slowly moved her legs and began to stand. As her systems told her, her right foreleg and left hind leg weren’t responding correctly. She compensated, but they were still moving slowly. She saw that her right foreleg had been slightly twisted, and a wire was sticking out of the joint.

She got to her hooves unsteadily. As she did, she saw that the visor that protected her eyes was shattered, and fragments of it dropped from her face. She could only see with her left eye. There was a strange rattling sound in her head, like someone shaking a box of shattered glass. She tilted her head.

Something dropped out of her head. She looked down to see it. It was purple and crystalline.

Her eye. It was cracked. Shattered.

Her ears were still working, however, and thus she was able to hear the sound of ponies nearby. She turned and saw that she had landed near the Ponyville Spa. In the window, she saw the horrified faces of Aloe, Lotus, and the other spa workers, including Bulk Biceps. Judging from their expressions, she realized that she probably looked even worse than she’d thought.

Then she heard another sound. She turned to look, even though she knew what it was.

004 was stomping up the street. He was moving briskly, but not running. He must have realized that he didn’t need to.

“You are damaged and unable to resist further. My orders are to retrieve you in the most intact state possible. However, failure to surrender will result in further damage.” He leaned down to stare at her. “Submit.”

She managed to raise her head. “N-nnnno-o,” she managed to say through a burst of static.

He seized her by the head with both hooves, picking her up and slamming her to the ground. Then he pressed his hoof onto her back, holding her down. “Initiating emergency neutralization procedures.” A panel in his foreleg began to slide open.

“HEY!”

004 stopped what he was doing as Bulk Biceps jumped onto his back and began lifting him with all his might, somehow getting him off the ground.

“Interference detected.”

“DARN RIGHT, YA BIG BULLY!” Bulk shouted, straining as hard as he could to lift the massive automaton. “NOPONY’S - HRGH- GONNA… HURT… TURING TEST!”

With a final yell, he managed to supplex 004, smashing him into the ground.

“YEAH!!” Bulk shouted triumphantly.

“Bulk Biceps-eps-eps, do n-nnnot innnterfere!” Turing said as she struggled to get up, her voice still malfunctioning.

Bulk ignored her and flew over to her, helping her to rise. “DON’T WORRY, TURING! I SHOWED THAT BIG GUY WHAT HAPPENS WHEN--”

004 tackled Bulk, pinning him to the ground before hoisting him up. As he protested, 004 simply tossed him at the wall of the spa like he was no more than a pebble. He crashed through it, leaving a hole before landing roughly amid the debris, groaning in pain.

“Th-that all ya got?” he asked as he tried to sit up.

“Negative,” 004 said. He took a step forward.

“Bulk, darling, stay down!” Lotus cried, holding him back. “You cannot beat this big one!”

“I can’t… ung… I can’t just let her get hurt! Somepony’s gotta help her!”

And then a voice from outside shouted, “That’s just what I was thinking!”

004 turned just in time to see a pink gelatinous glob of something fly through the air and wrap itself around his legs. He tried to move but found that the substance was stronger than it appeared. He looked up to see who had thrown it.

It was Bon Bon. She wore her saddlebags and held several items that resembled candies in her hoof.

“Bon Bon!” Turing exclaimed. “I tho-o-o-ught you were helping-ing Lyra.”

“She’s safe, Turing!” Bon Bon called back, glancing over at her. “But you look like you need a helping hoof… or two!”

“Well, I suppose that’s my cue!”

Turing saw the Doctor step out of an alley. That device he’d built earlier, the Hasty Waisty, was around his barrel. He turned the dial and became a blur as he dashed by 004, lobbing something at him. The device exploded, and Turing saw that 004 was now moving much slower than before.

The Doctor stopped next to Turing Test, helping her up.

“ThereweareMissTuringitseemsmytimebombwill-- ohdearI’veleftthedeviceon!” He turned the dial again, and his speech became normal. “As I was saying, I’ve improved my time bomb. That should slow the brute down enough for us to handle him.” He winked at her. “There we are, now off you go! Get Princess Twilight, and we’ll keep him busy.”

“But Doctor--”

“Sorry, I’d love to stay and chat, but Bon Bon will need my help, so please, don’t argue and, well,” he turned to her, his normally cheerful expression serious, “basically, run.”

Turing paused for a moment, then gave a nod. She began to hobble away.

“Twwoooo taaarrrrggeetttsss idennntiffieeeed.”

“Ugh,” Bon Bon said, making a face at 004’s slowed speech, “he sounds even worse like this.”

She tossed another glob at his legs, fastening them even tighter as he struggled to move forward.

“Marvelous invention, my dear! What are they?” the Doctor asked her.

“Super sticky taffy!” she said, reaching into her bag. “It’s keeping him still, but he’s stretching it! It’ll break if this keeps up, so keep him slowed down!”

“I’ve only got a few more of these!” he said, tossing another one. “I hope you’ve got something more than stickiness planned!”

“Working on it… ah ha!” She took out several round, large balls and threw them with all her might. “High-impact jawbreakers!”

The pieces of candy flew at 004, but they only shattered against his hull, seemingly without affect.

Bon Bon blanched. Jeez, even Glory was more affected by these! Well, in that case…

She pulled out another weaponized candy. “Ah ha! I found my gum!” She unwrapped it and popped it into her mouth.

“I doubt a few bubbles will hold this fellow,” the Doctor said, readying another time bomb. “By the way, not to cause a panic, but this is the last one I have!”

Worse yet, he saw, was that even moving in slow motion, 004 had almost pried the taffy rope from his legs. He threw the device at him, knowing it was the last one.

“It’s no ordinary gum,” she said, spitting it into her hoof. She ran at 004 and stuck it on his chest before he could react. She ran back and tackled the Doctor to the ground. “Get down!” she shouted.

A second later, the gum detonated with a deafening sound and a shockwave that they could feel in their chests.

“Great whickering stallions, what was that?!”

“Explosive plastique gum,” she said. “It just needs a little chewing to start the chemical reaction.”

“Are you mad?!” he exclaimed. “What sort of mad mare would chew an explosive?!”

She coughed as the smoke from the explosion caught up to them. “Well, that’s why I only made one. But that’s all we needed, at least.” She let out a relieved sigh and smiled… until she saw the smoke clear. “Oh you’ve got to be kidding me!”

004 was still there. His movements were still slow, but they were getting faster. He was singed, with a blast mark on his chest, but he looked otherwise unfazed by the explosion. Worse yet, he’d freed his legs from the taffy and was now galloping toward them in slow motion.

“Oh no, oh no,” Bon Bon exclaimed, backing away as she dug into her saddlebags. “There’s got to be something I can use!”

The Doctor, meanwhile, was thinking as fast as he could. 004 had no obvious weaknesses, no openings on his hull, nothing that would let them get at his machinery to stop him. Even with the Doctor’s normally swift mind, he felt like he was freezing under the pressure-- and then an idea struck him.

“A brain freeze!” he said. “Ah ha, that might do it!”

“What?!” Bon Bon demanded.

“Do you have something cryogenic? You know, cold?”

“Yeah, but--”

“Aim it for the grill on his muzzle!” He turned, and his eyes went wide when he saw that 004 was almost upon them. “We’ve only got a few seconds more!”

Bon Bon whirled around, bringing out a green and white candy and a slingshot. She loaded the candy into the shot and aimed at the grill on 004’s muzzle, then closed one eye as she lined up the shot. He was almost on them.

The Doctor shut his eyes as 004 reared up, ready to bring his hooves down on them both.

Bon Bon fired, and the mint went right through the bars of his muzzle. He staggered back.

“Yes!” Bon Bon laughed. “Eat wintergreen, you monster!”

“Foreign object detected,” 004 said in his normal voice.

There was a crackling sound, and frost began to spread along his muzzle. Ice began to form over his eyes as well, and suddenly there was a sharp sound like a dull explosion as his head was suddenly frozen in a large block of ice.

He staggered, his head lolling.

“Did… did it work?” Bon Bon asked.

Then 004 stood up, righting his head. She heard his voice muffled through the ice: “Compensating. Balance restored.”

He shot forward, picking her up. She screamed as he seized her, struggling to get free. He simply reared back and headbutted her, smashing the ice block over her head.

She went limp, and he dropped her. She fell to the ground, unconscious.

004 turned to face the Doctor.

“W-wait!” he shouted, holding up his hooves. “I’m not armed! I have no devices left to use!”

“Incorrect.”

Using his magic, 004 snatched the Hasty Waisty belt from the Doctor, placing it on the ground and stomping on it, smashing it to pieces.

“Ah… yes, I’d forgotten that. Well, nevertheless, now I’m unarmed! There’s no need to hurt me!”

004 stopped. The Doctor had his hooves up. He was no longer a threat, which meant that 004 could concentrate on locating 003M. However…

He noticed that the Doctor’s eyes were sporadically looking up. He was looking at something.

004 glanced upward. There was a gray pegasus with a blonde mane pushing a gray cloud directly above him.

“This is for hurting my friends, you meanie!” she shouted as she kicked the cloud.

The cloud released a powerful lightning bolt that shot down directly into 004, its electricity coursing through his metallic body.

“Ha ha!” the Doctor cheered over the resounding thunderclap. “Excellent shot, my dear!”

“We did it!” Derpy exclaimed.

“Minor errors detected. Main systems undamaged.”

They both froze. Turing’s creators had apparently learned from their mistake with her and had not given her brother such a weakness.

“Additional target identified.”

The Doctor gasped. “Don’t you dare--”

004 fired a beam upwards. The shot hit Derpy in the chest, and she cried out before she fell to the ground like a stone.

“Target neutralized.”

The Doctor gave a sorrowful glance over at where Derpy had fallen and then glared at 004 hatefully. “You really are nothing like your sister.”

“That assessment is correct.” With a swift motion, he smacked the Doctor upside the head, knocking him out.

The panels on his body opened slightly, and he let out more puffs of steam as his system ventilated and cooled before closing the panels again.

“All targets neutralized. Recommencing search for--”

A huge, powerful blast of magic hit him in the shoulder, enough to knock him over. He raised his head and saw where it had come from.

It was Turing Test, now in U-Mode.

“I will n-nnot allow you to hurt my friends annny further-er-er, Brother!” Turing Test shouted as she fired another blast. This one hit him in the same spot, opening a hole in his exterior.

She’d wanted to run. She’d been afraid, perhaps even more afraid than when she’d fallen down the ravine in the Everfree Forest. But even as she’d hobbled away, her keen ears had detected the sounds of Bon Bon and the Doctor panicking. What if even more ponies were hurt because of her? What if they needed her help?

What would Twilight Sparkle do?

That last question had settled it. She’d stopped and turned around, going back to try and help.

She didn’t know much offensive magic, but she still knew that rock-smashing blast that Twilight had taught her during those first few days.

Now 004 was in front of her. There was an opening in his hull. One more shot would disable his leg and possibly other systems, finally stopping him for good. He was still recovering from the last blast and would be unable to raise a shield.

This was the perfect moment, she realized, and so she aimed her final shot.

Her horn glowed, and the magic built up. She fired.

The magic exploded with a loud bang in front of her, sending her flying back.

Warning: Malfunction in magic system detected. Probable cause identified: thaumatrium leak has created an imbalance in magic levels. Magic system malfunction has created a blockage. Initializing emergency shutdown of U-Mode.

She froze. If her magic was gone, then she’d be helpless! She tried to override the system.

Override failed. Administrator privileges required. Commencing emergency shutdown of U-Mode.

Her horn deactivated, sliding back into her head. She tried to stand again even as she heard 004 approaching her.

“No… n-no! This cannot be… I must--”

004 levitated her with his own magic, holding her in place. She felt a tug on her right foreleg. He was pulling on it with increasingly great force.

“Brother, ple-ease, do not do this,” she said, the fear in her voice becoming stronger. “Please, stop!”

He ignored her, and his horn glowed brighter. The force pulling on her leg became greater. The metal strained, screws popped, and wires snapped.

With one last motion, he ripped her leg off.

Oil dripped from her shoulder, and wires sparked momentarily. He tossed the leg aside like a pony discarding an apple core. He then turned her around in midair and began to do the same with her left hind leg.

She didn’t even protest. She knew it would do no good.

He tore her hind leg off, then dropped her roughly, letting the leg drop with her.

Still, she tried, with the little power she had, to drag herself away. With only two legs, she wouldn’t get far.

“H-help,” she called feebly. “Some-omepony, please…”

She didn’t get more than half a meter before 004 placed his hoof on her back again, holding her down.

“Unit 003M disabled. Initiating emergency neutralization procedures.”

The panel in his leg slid open. From it, a diamond-tipped circular saw extended and began to spin. With his magic, he held her head still as it began to descend toward the joint in her neck.

She took one last look around her. From windows in nearby shops, and peeking out from alleyways, she could see her new friends and neighbors watching helplessly, horrified at the sight unfolding. She could hear the fillies and colts that had been calling her “Gert” just a few days ago crying out her name, her real name, as their mothers shielded their eyes.

When 004 took her away, would seeing her like this be the way they remembered her? Smashed and torn apart, pleading for help?

“I do not want to go,” she whispered. “N-n-n-no. I want to stay-ay who I-I-I ammm.”

The saw entered her neck, giving an awful whine as it cut through the metal and rubber. He was attempting sever the main connection between her main systems and her power. Without that, she would deactivate.

And the next time she awoke, she might not be herself any longer. Surely her creators wouldn’t want her the way she was now.

She wished she could see her friends again. She wanted to see Twilight Sparkle one more time. Just to tell her something. Anything.

But still, if she only had a few moments left, there was at least something to say to the one who could listen.

“Brother,” she managed to say, “I know you cannot understa-a-a-and emotions-tions, but I want you to know, if you ever do,” she glanced up at him from the corner of her one functioning eye, “that I do not hate you. I do not haaate you at allll.”

He made no additional movement, and the saw continued on, but he did say one word in reply: “Acknowledged.”

There was a shower of sparks from her neck as the saw found its target. Her remaining limbs stiffened, and her eye blinked on and off repeatedly before the wire was completely severed. She fell limp, her eye darkened, and the electric hum she normally emitted fell silent.

“Unit 003M neutralized. Proceeding to Objective one.”

He heard a distant voice and the sound of ponies galloping toward him. He analyzed the sound… five ponies were approaching on hoof. One was flying.

He took his foot off Turing’s body and stepped back, waiting.

The ponies burst into view.

“Turing?” Twilight called. “Turing where are you?!”

It was Rarity who first spotted her, though, and when she saw her, she screamed in horror.

Twilight turned, and her mouth dropped open at the awful sight.

Turing was lying there, motionless. One eye was darkened. The other was missing, the empty socket gaping. Her shining hull was scraped, dented, and covered with dirt. Her faceplate was barely attached to her jaw. Two of her legs had been torn off and were lying next to her. She was leaking oil, and her wires were hanging loosely from her damaged shoulder and haunch.

Twilight felt a tightness in her chest, as if she’d just come across a dead body in the woods. She felt lightheaded, like she was about to be sick.

Fluttershy covered her mouth as she began crying. Rarity looked away, shielding her gaze. Pinkie slumped to the ground and was already calling Turing’s name as tears filled her eyes. Rainbow Dash’s face was frozen in disbelief. And Applejack simply closed her eyes and solemnly removed her hat.

“What…” Twilight slowly raised her eyes to stare at the hulking monstrosity standing over her friend. “What did you do to her?!” she screamed as her wings flared out.

“Unit 003M has been neutralized. Force was required.”

“You…” She swallowed, trying to calm herself. “Did you kill her?”

He tilted his head. “Illogical. You cannot kill something that is not alive.”

Twilight grit her teeth, her rage building up again.

“Unit 003M has not been destroyed. This unit will be repaired.”

Twilight breathed a sigh of relief. The others seemed to relax slightly as well.

“You’re darn right she’s gonna be repaired!” Rainbow Dash shouted, stomping her hoof. She snorted like a wild horse. “And after we kick your sorry flank, we’ll take her to the Doc or Gadget or some other science pony to do it! Not whatever mad scientists built you!”

“Negative. She must be retrieved. You will not stop this.”

“Wanna bet, ya walkin’ scrapyard?” Applejack shot back. “We’re not gonna let you waltz in, take our friend, an’ do goodness-knows-what to ‘er!”

“I did not waltz here. I walked.”

They all blinked, but not even Pinkie laughed, though she did say, “Yeah, that’s Rinnie’s brother all right.”

Twilight held up a hoof. “Listen to me carefully,” she began, her voice calm, but shaking with barely subdued rage. “Back away from Turing Test. Get out of here and never come back to Ponyville, and maybe we won’t have to fight you.”

“You lack the strength, speed, and power to pose a threat. Unless there is some ability you possess that I have not detected, your attack will fail.”

They all exchanged a look. Twilight smiled.

“Funny you should say that,” she said. The others lined up next to her. “Okay, everypony, it’s been a while… ready?”

“Ready!” they all exclaimed.

They all began to glow as columns of light shot up from around them, soaring into the sky.

As they began to light up, so did 004’s sensors.

Magical signatures detected. Beginning data collection.

The six of them began to rise up, the magic within them building. There was a flash, and each of them now bore a different appearance. Their manes were more voluminous, their cutie marks adorned their legs, and they glowed with massive power.

“You still think you can defeat us, 004?” Twilight asked him as she flashed a confident smile. “We have the most powerful magic in Equestria! And when you came after our friend, you awakened it! Give up now, or we’ll use it!”

Analysis at 75%. Data collection is incomplete.

He stared back at them, and his horn glowed as he readied a spell. “I will not surrender.”

Twilight narrowed her eyes. “So be it,” she said. She closed her eyes, as did the others. A swirling rainbow encircled them and then arced into the air before coming down, straight at 004.

Analysis at 100%. Data collection complete. Objective one complete. Initiating exit procedure…

The rainbow came down, its power blasting the spot where 004 appeared to be standing. There was a blinding flash, and it was over.

But when the light cleared, 004 was no longer there.

And neither was Turing Test.

“W-what?!” Twilight cried.

The magic began to drain from them, and they all set down, their transformations vanishing as they returned to their normal selves.

“They’re gone!” Fluttershy cried. “But how?”

“He teleported,” Twilight said breathlessly. “He got away before our attack hit him. He’s… he’s gone, and he took Turing Test with him…”

She instantly took off into the air, casting her eyes around as she began to look for Turing Test. She went ever higher, hoping to see some sign of them.

Helplessly, she called her friend’s name: “Turing Test!”

And though she knew Turing was in no condition to reply, she called out her name again and again, letting the name echo out into the cold, empty air over Ponyville even as her voice grew strained, ever more quiet, and ever more mournful.

“Turing Test!” she shouted again, though this time it was more feeble, drowned out as the lump in her throat grew, and at last she hung her head, burying her face in her hooves as she began to sob, and she understood one inescapable fact:

Turing Test, her friend, was gone.

To be continued…

Monody

View Online

It was the day after.

Twilight made her way up the hallway in Ponyville General Hospital, noting that she had done so twice before in the last few months: the last time had been after Applejack’s accident, and the first time had been when Applejack had found…

She paused, shutting her eyes.

Focus, she told herself. I’m here to check on the injured.

She knocked on the door to one of the hospital rooms before entering. Once inside, she saw the three ponies occupying the beds.

The Doctor had the bed closest to the door, and he had a bandage around his head. Across from him was Bulk Biceps, who was wearing a brace on his shoulder that went over his chest. And lastly, in the bed nearest the window, was Big Mac, with a large bandage around his barrel.

“Ah, Princess Twilight!” the Doctor said, smiling when he saw her. “So nice of you to come and visit!”

“Eeyup!” Big Mac agreed.

“YEAH!!” Bulk Biceps added, causing the others to wince.

“Uh, Bulk,” Twilight said, holding out her hoof parallel to the ground, “sorry to say this, but the nurses wanted me to remind you to try and keep it quiet, because you’re disturbing the other patients in the ward.”

“Oh! Sorry,” he said sheepishly, actually pulling up the sheets of his bed, as if to hide from her. “I’m just glad to have visitors.”

“You say that as if nopony’s visited you at all,” the Doctor said, waving his hoof. “Those nice spa ponies stopped by, not to mention Miss Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash.”

“Eeyup!” Big Mac agreed.

“Not to mention Mr. Apple’s had visits from his family as well.” He grinned. “Not to mention those flowers Miss Cheerilee brought you.”

Big Mac blushed. “E-eeyup,” he said, chuckling slightly.

“YE- um, I mean, yeah!” Bulk Biceps said, managing to keep his voice down.

“I, meanwhile,” the Doctor sighed, “haven’t had a single visitor that was here to see me.”

“Well, there is now!” a bubbly voice cooed from behind Twilight.

They all turned to see Derpy hovering in the doorway and carrying a small bag.

“Derpy!” the Doctor exclaimed.

“Doc!” Derpy cried back.

“Derpy!” Twilight exclaimed.

“Twilight!” Derpy cried.

“BULK BICEPS!!” Bulk bellowed.

They all turned to look at him.

“Hooboy,” Big Mac said, smacking his own forehead.

“Well… um, not that I’m not happy to see you, my dear,” the Doctor said, looking to Derpy, “but what are you doing here? I was told you were being treated elsewhere!”

“Oh, well, they said that my injuries weren’t that bad,” she said, indicating a small bandage on her chest, “so they released me!”

“That’s great news, Derpy,” Twilight said, offering her a smile.

“Yep! So I decided to bring you a present, Doc!” She flew over to his bedside and gave him the bag. “Jelly Babies! And I’ll bake you muffins until you’re all better!”

“Oh! Well, that’s…” He paused, giving her a broad grin. “That sounds lovely, my dear. And I shall look forward to your company.”

“Yay!” she cheered, clapping her hooves together. Then she turned away, biting her lip. “Um, by the way, I ate a few. I got lost in the hospital and it took a really long time to find your room. I kept asking everypony ‘Where’s the doctor?’ but it’s a hospital, so they kept sending me to see all the doctors around here! I’ve already had an x-ray, an eye exam, and I think I scheduled a physical… twice!”

The Doctor chuckled. “Only you, Derpy,” he said. “My word, it’s good to have you here. I do enjoy our little chats… er, not that you gentlecolts aren’t good company as well!” he said hurriedly to Bulk and Big Mac.

“Yeah!”

“Eeyup!”

The Doctor smiled before leaning over and whispering out the side of his mouth: “Though honestly I’m the one doing most of the talking. And I don’t think that Doctor Stable fellow appreciates that everyone just calls me ‘The Doctor.’”

Twilight cleared her throat, and they all turned to face her.

“Listen, everypony, I just wanted to come by to say, well… thank you.”

They all looked to each other, then back to Twilight.

“Listen, you all got hurt trying to help Turing Test,” she explained. “I heard about your injuries. You put yourselves in danger trying to fight off 004 just to give Turing Test a fighting chance. I think you’re all very brave and I wanted to come by to thank you from the bottom of my heart.”

They all smiled.

“You’re perfectly welcome, Your Highness,” the Doctor said, bowing humbly. “I only wish that we’d been able to help poor Turing Test more.”

She took a deep breath and let it out. “So you know what happened. You know that he took her.”

They all bowed their heads.

“Um, Twilight,” Derpy said, “I don’t suppose you know where Turing Test is yet, do you?”

Twilight closed her eyes and shook her head.

“Oh,” Derpy said quietly, frowning as her ears drooped.

“But we won’t give up until we do know,” Twilight added, her voice hard. She opened her eyes and there was a stern, cold determination that was clear to all of them. “You can count on that.”

There was silence among them as they all took that in.

“Well…” Derpy said slowly, “if you want to see Bon Bon, I was sharing a room with her, so I can show you where she is, Twilight.”

Twilight nodded. “Yes, I’d like to thank her as well. Lead the way.”

***

Two days later, Twilight was lying on her bed, staring up at the crystalline ceiling of her room. On a small table by her bed was a newspaper reporting the incident. The title read “Terror! Robot Attacks Ponyville!” The story documented the attack, the injuries and damage to property, and how 004 had been driven off. A few paragraphs in, it finally mentioned Turing Test.

Twilight closed her eyes. The last few days seemed distant, somehow. It was like waking up from a disturbing dream that she could only half remember. She tried to make sense of it.

She’d told Princess Celestia, of course. The nation was on high alert and Celestia had ordered sentries to be on the lookout for any suspicious activity. Obviously the conspirators were transporting 004 in secret, since a giant robot pony would be impossible to miss, but just the same, there was the possibility that they might have left some evidence.

Luna had also assured Twilight that the Night Guard would do their best to follow any lead they could.

Twilight wanted to stay optimistic, but after 48 hours with no word, the chances were that the conspirators had gotten away clean.

That just left the bigger questions: Why did they take Turing Test? Why now? What had 004 been after? What were the conspirators going to do next? And when would they make their move?

And where was Turing Test now? And what were her creators doing to her? Was she afraid? Was she sad? Was she calling out for Twilight to come save her again and again only to realize that nopony knew where she was and--

“Stop…” She whispered the word, covering her face with her hooves and clenching her teeth. She told herself that such thoughts wouldn’t help anypony; all it would do was torture her by turning her inside out with worry.

She sat up in bed. With a sigh, she got up and went to the door. She didn’t have much of an appetite, but she knew she should eat something. Maybe some tea with sugar to clear her thoughts.

To her surprise, she saw that Spike was already in the kitchen, sitting at the table and idly munching on gemstones from a bowl.

“Hi, Twilight,” he said, sitting up when he saw her. “Did you need something, or--”

She shook her head. “I’m just making some tea.”

He nodded and watched her fill the tea kettle, boil the water, and brew her tea. She pulled up a chair, and they both sat in silence for a few minutes.

“Has the mail come yet?” Twilight asked idly.

“Y--” He paused, cringing slightly.

“What?” she asked, raising an eyebrow.

“It’s… it’s nothing important,” Spike said.

“Spike…” she said, setting down her tea and leaning toward him.

Spike sighed. He got up from the kitchen table and walked out. When he returned, he had a brown envelope and a few slips of paper.

“What is this?” Twilight asked, taking the papers from him.

“Well, one is just an official letter reminding you about the Equestrian National Conference this weekend, but the rest are telegrams about… well, about Turing,” he said. “Mr. Vanderbull, Fancy Pants, and Dr. Turing are all saying that they’ll help however they can and want you to know that all you have to do is ask if you need anything.”

Twilight smiled. “That’s nice of them,” she said. “You didn’t have to hide these from me, Spike.”

“Well, maybe not, but… well, Dr. Turing’s telegram also said that maybe you shouldn’t look inside the package he mailed a few days ago. Unfortunately, it came at the same time as the telegram.”

“Package?” Twilight asked. She inspected the brown envelope. It was larger than a letter and it felt like there was a stack of papers inside. She saw that it was indeed from Dr. Turing. She hesitated for a moment, but then tore open the envelope and removed the contents.

There was a letter from Dr. Turing and a magazine. The letter read:

Dear Princess Twilight and Turing Test,
I am proud to share this with you. Your feedback and assistance were invaluable, and I’m truly grateful that I was able to meet you both. I believe you will find the feature article of this latest issue of Scientific Equestrian to be an excellent read, and I believe it is only the beginning of a longstanding relationship between this nation and the automata who will one day call it home.
Please do not hesitate to visit again the next time you are in Trottingham. Mint and I would be honoured to have you as our guests again, and the same goes for Miss Gadget and your assistant Spike as well.
As always, your dear and faithful friend,
-Talon Turing

She smiled. “I think you’d like Dr. Turing, Spike,” she said. “He’s really nice.”

“He sure seemed nice in his telegram,” Spike replied. “So, uh, now that you opened the package, what is it?”

Twilight looked at the cover of the magazine and gasped, nearly dropping it in surprise. She covered her mouth as a lump formed in her throat.

The magazine, the issue of Scientific Equestrian in question, had a large picture of Turing Test standing and looking slightly over her shoulder. It was one of many that Twilight had sent to Dr. Turing along with some of her other correspondence over the past few months. She’d reported on Turing’s progress, her new friendships, her habits, her likes and dislikes, and so on in addition to answering any questions he had.

The cover read: “The Turing Test: How A Mechanical Pony and a Princess Rewrote the Rules.”

A smaller picture of Twilight Sparkle and Talon Turing was in the corner.

Twilight’s lip quivered, but she took a deep breath and opened the magazine.

“Whoa, whoa, Twilight, are you sure that you--”

“I’m sure, Spike,” she replied quietly, giving him a smile. “I appreciate that Dr. Turing didn’t want to upset me, but I want to see what he wrote. This article is official documentation of all the effort Turing Test put into becoming her own pony. Ponies might talk about this for a long time to come. And right now I… I don’t know what else I can do for her… so I’ll at least read what history might remember about her.”

He nodded. “Yeah,” he said, pulling up a seat next to her. “Then count me in too.”

***

...In sum, while quantifying artificial intelligence may be no less difficult than quantifying it for organic beings, perhaps ultimately that is because they truly are one and the same. My experiences with the automaton that bears my name and her caretaker, Princess Twilight, have shown me that my original thought experiment was far too limited in scope. It is not in mere actions and responses that we show the content and quality of our minds, but in genuine action, in interaction, in camaraderie, and, yes, in friendship.
If other beings are forged in the fires of our blossoming genius, then the best measure of intelligence may not be in mere guessing games, but in offering them our hooves (or claws!) in friendship and watching them as they come into their own as we all go toward a brighter future together.
That is the thesis inherent in Twilight Sparkle’s directive, and that is the lesson we can ultimately learn from Turing Test, the robot I am proud to call my friend.
-T. Turing

They were both silent as Twilight put down the magazine on the table, shutting it quietly.

“Wow,” Spike breathed. He swallowed as he looked up at Twilight.

Her head was turned, and her eyes were hidden behind her bangs. She pushed her seat away from the table and made her way to the door in silence.

“Twilight?” Spike called.

Twilight either didn’t hear him or didn’t feel like responding as she made her way down the hallway, stopping in front of a door she’d come to many times before in the last six months.

Turing Test’s room.

She turned the knob with her magic and entered, Spike following behind.

The room was still spartan as ever, with no bed or chairs or any other creature comforts common to a normal bedroom.

It had her small table, upon which was laid a small microfiber cloth next to a can of metal polish. In one corner was a mirror. In another was her crank generator. On a shelf by the wall were numerous trinkets: a framed picture of Turing and Rainbow Dash at the start of their aerial race across Ponyville, the carved placard with Turing Test’s name misspelled from the Cutie Mark Crusaders, a program from her play signed by the other cast members, the mask from her Nightmare Night costume, some records from Vinyl Scratch and Octavia, a copy of Tom Sawhorse, the snow globe Twilight had given her for Hearth’s Warming, and a box which contained the small, heart-shaped piece of rose quartz she’d received from Maud Pie.

All around her were the pieces of her friend’s life. These were the things that mattered to her: the precious things that her friends had given her and she, in turn, had recognized as having value. They were the remnants of a life that, mechanical or not, was no longer there.

Though the room was comparatively tiny, in her absence, it now seemed cavernous and empty.

And that was when Twilight finally allowed herself to cry.

A sob escaped her, and she slumped to the floor, the tears spilling down her cheeks. Spike went to her side and held her, trying to comfort her, but soon his own tears came, and the two of them just held each other as they sat, alone, in the room Turing Test had once called home.

“Oh, Spike, I… I don’t know what to do!” she cried, holding the little dragon tightly. “I just keep waiting to hear some news or something, and I keep telling everypony that we’ll find her, but I don’t even know if that’s true! I just keep seeing her like that… Turing Test didn’t deserve to be hurt like that and taken against her will! What kind of ponies would do that to her?!

“And now she’s out there, somewhere, and I’d give anything to get her back, but I just don’t know what to do!”

“Twilight…”

Spike held her, patting her gently, though he was crying almost as much as she was.

“Listen,” he said, finding his voice, “I know how you feel, but don’t give up! You were the first one to see something in Turing Test. Everypony else was afraid of her or just saw her as some science experiment. Heck, even Celestia wanted nothing to do with her! You’re the one who made friends with her and helped her make friends with everypony! So I know that if there’s anypony who’s connected to Turing Test, then it’s you! There’s gotta be some way to find Turing, and you and the rest of our friends are the ones who can do it!”

Twilight looked down at him. Gradually she managed to smile and held him close, nuzzling him lightly. “Spike,” she whispered, “thank you. I can always count on you to help me through the tough times.”

“Aw, jeez,” he said as he blushed. “Come on, Twilight, let’s try to figure something out. If you could save Equestria all those times, then finding the ponies who took Turing Test should be a piece of cake!”

“You’re right, Spike,” she said, standing up. She wiped her eyes, taking a deep breath. “Let’s head to the library. We’ll start looking over all the information we’ve got. And let’s get everypony else to look with us. There must be something we’ve missed.”

***

“I got nothing,” Rainbow Dash said, flopping backwards with a groan.

They were in the library, all six of them, plus Spike, and after another full day of looking through all the information on all possible suspects, nothing else had caught their eye.

“Keep checking, Rainbow!” Twilight said as she looked up from the papers she was holding. “Somewhere in here is the answer! We just need to--”

“Twilight, no offense, but we’ve checked through all of these papers like a hundred times!” Rainbow Dash shot back, tossing the papers aside. “I wanna find Tee as much as you do, but this isn’t getting us anywhere!”

“But--”

“I hate to say it, but she’s right, darling,” Rarity said, raising an eyebrow as she looked through a document provided by the Royal Guard. “Most of these papers are filled with cut-and-dry statistics, and as impressive as the fortunes are of some of these entrepreneurs, I don’t think it’s getting us even a smidge closer to an answer.”

Fluttershy nodded. “And even after knowing Turing all that time, I still don’t know anything about what makes her work,” she said, frowning at the diagrams of her machinery. “If Gadget, the Royal Guard, and the Night Guard couldn’t connect any of this to somepony else, then what can we do?”

Twilight sighed. “I know it’s frustrating, but-- hey!” She paused, seeing that Pinkie Pie had actually nodded off and was sleeping on a stack of papers. “Pinkie!”

“Huh?!” Pinkie exclaimed, sitting up in a panic, some of the documents stuck to her face. “What, what is it, did somepony find something?!”

“Ugh!” Twilight groaned, massaging her temples. “There’s got to be something else we can do. Something we’re missing…”

Applejack shrugged at that. “Not unless ya got an expert who can help us make sense o’ this. We got a list o’ suspects whose names I’ve never heard of an’ a list o’ Turing Test’s parts from when we first catalogued ‘em after we found ‘er. If there’s an answer here, I sure as heck can’t figure it out.”

Then she noticed that Twilight was tapping her chin. “An expert, huh? Hmm…”

***

It was the next day, and they were now in the throne room, the papers from the previous day stacked neatly into separate piles on the round table at the center.

“Um… she did say she’d be here by noon, right?” Fluttershy asked.

“Yes, that’s what the telegram said,” Twilight said.

Silence settled in among them.

“What time is it?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“It’s a minute later than the last time you asked,” Rarity said, rolling her eyes.

“So…?”

“12:10,” Twilight grumbled.

“Well, while we wait,” Pinkie said, pulling up a picnic basket from below the table, “I brought some snacks! No sense going hungry while we wait for her to lend us a hoof!”

Then a muffled voice from behind the door to the room said: “Did somepony say ‘lend us a hoof?’”

The door burst open, and Gadget stood there, her mechanical limbs spread wide in a grandiose display. “Because I’ve got four!”

They all gawked at her.

“W-well, ‘hands,’ not ‘hooves,’ but still!” she said, blushing and looking away as her voice grew quieter. “Though, I guess I also have four hooves too, since I’m a pony.” Her voice grew quieter as she looked down. “B-but it doesn’t look as cool when I use my regular limbs, so…”

Spike rubbed his face. “Oh brother.”

The others all stared back at her in silence as her face turned nearly the same color as Pinkie Pie.

“Heh heh… um… s-sorry,” she muttered.

Twilight sighed, but gave her a kind smile. “It’s okay, Gadget. We’re just glad you’re here.”

“M-me too!” she said. “And I’m so sorry I’m late! I dropped my papers on the way over here, and I had to reorganize them.”

“Papers?” Twilight asked.

“R-right!” she said, rushing over to them. “Okay, um… I brought some research that we can look through--”

“Oh, great,” Rainbow groaned.

“Rainbow, come on,” Twilight said, rolling her eyes. To Gadget, she said, “What kind of research?”

“Well, see, ever since I gave Princess Celestia my research, I’ve been working on a bunch of other projects with Mr. Vanderbull, but in between I’ve tried to think about the problem in some different ways. Like, instead of thinking about who has the money and resources or who manufactures the parts used in Turing’s construction, why not think about other machines!”

Lifting herself up on her mechanical limbs, she climbed onto the table, balancing herself on the backs of their thrones and hovering over them like some kind of arthropod. From her jacket, she removed more papers and photographs and began placing them on or near the different stacks of papers they’d already placed.

“What do you mean by ‘other machines,’ Gadget?” Rarity asked. “I doubt there are any other machines like Turing Test.”

“Maybe not,” Gadget said, “but there are a lot of enthusiasts who build automata for a hobby. But only a few of them have the connections or money to even attempt to build something like Turing Test. That’s why I figured it has to be somepony connected to a lot of money and, most importantly, a company! With enough connections, they could get resources, cover their tracks, pay ponies off, and make anything they couldn’t get themselves!”

“So, what you’re saying,” Twilight said, “is that we’re looking for some business tycoon?”

“Maybe not just one pony. Well, definitely not just one, but that pony might be the leader of this group. We know that much because of Blue Blazer, that Burrojangles guy who got into my workshop, and,” she made a face, “Fine Print. This has to be a group. Probably a big group. But they’re probably organized under one big leader or one big company.”

Fluttershy raised a hoof gingerly.

“Yes, Miss Fluttershy?” Gadget asked.

“So, you think it’s somepony connected to building robots and also connected to a big company?”

Gadget pushed her glasses up her muzzle. “Maybe… but when I said ‘other machines,’ I mean machines that also use parts that Turing has.”

“Hey!” Pinkie said, getting all their attention. They saw she was holding one of the photographs Gadget had set down. “This is a cuckoo clock! But Rinny doesn’t have any tiny birds inside of her…”

“It’s not the bird, it’s the gears, Miss Pinkie!” Gadget said, holding up a cutaway diagram of the clock. “Turing Test has a lot of moving parts, including gears. I thought maybe some clock manufacturers could be involved.”

“Wait a minute,” Rainbow Dash said, frowning at one of the papers Gadget had placed near her. “This looks like a refrigerator! What does this have to do with Tee?”

“Well, the valves inside are similar to some of the tubes in her wings…”

“And this… engine thingy?” Rarity asked.

“The pistons are like the ones in Turing’s legs.”

Then Gadget felt a tap on one of her mechanical arms. She looked to see Applejack tapping on the mechanical hand that was grasping the back of Applejack’s throne.

“Look, I know yer excited to share all this stuff, sugarcube,” Applejack said, “but maybe you oughta come down and help us cut through the technical stuff.”

“O-oh!... Yes, of course. I’m so sorry!” she said hurriedly as she got down from her perch. “I’m sorry, I was just trying to be thorough!”

Applejack chuckled. “It’s all right, but maybe there’s a better way to think about this.”

“I think so too, Applejack,” Twilight said. “The Royal Guard, the Night Guard, and all of us together couldn’t figure this out, so maybe we need to shorten the list.”

“Well, what do you mean?” Gadget asked.

“You’re the expert,” Rainbow said as she idly flipped through more diagrams. “Who do you think it was?”

“What?!” Gadget cried. “But that would just be a guess! I don’t have any proof, so I’m not sure that it’d be right, and I don’t want to waste our time--”

“We’re already wasting time going in circles trying to figure this out,” Twilight said quietly. “And while we do, Turing Test is somewhere else. She’s in danger, Gadget.” She looked up at her with pleading eyes. “Gadget, if you had to pick, who would it be?”

“The Mustang Peaches,” she replied instantly.

They all stared at her after she blurted out the immediate response.

“The… who?” Rarity asked, raising an eyebrow. “I’m sorry, but I don’t believe I’ve heard of them.”

“I have,” Applejack said. “They’re peach farmers down in Mustangia. Not surprisin’, considerin’ the name.”

“Isn’t Mustangia the same place where that pony we mistook for Miss Harshwhinny was from?” Rainbow Dash asked.

“Oh, she was fun!” Pinkie said. “She sure didn’t like all the closed in spaces, though.”

“Not surprised,” Applejack said, leaning back in her throne as she adjusted her hat. “Mustangia’s pretty wild country. It’s at the southern border. Lots of peach farms and chicken coops. If you’ve ever had a canned peach, chances are it came from there.”

“But I thought it was just some backwater podunk town!” Rarity exclaimed.

Fluttershy tapped her chin. “Maybe… but some ponies say the same thing about Ponyville, and one of the Princesses lives here! In fact, lots of important things happen here!”

Twilight tapped the table, getting their attention. “Girls, maybe we should actually hear why Gadget picked Mustangia before we start arguing about it.”

They all looked sheepish at that and turned to Gadget, who was scrunching inward away from them all after her suggestion had received such a strong reaction.

“W-well,” she said, taking a deep breath, “it’s a simple case of Ochcolt’s Razor: the hypothesis with the fewest assumptions is most likely the right one! I made a short list of things that might mean somepony had a hoof in building Turing Test. Things like experience with automata, having a lot of money, having factories, access to resources, secrecy, and a probable cause to be working against Equestria. The Mustang Peach family in Mustangia fits all of those things.

“See, a hundred years ago, the head of the Mustang Peach family, Dearborn Crumble, was the pony who invented the farming automaton that we saw in the Manehattan museum, the one that Celestia refused to endorse. He spent the rest of his life trying to convince other ponies that it could work, but nopony took him seriously. The family still has his old designs and a lot of his older prototypes, so they have the knowledge, and it’s possible they’re carrying a grudge against Celestia… and, um, maybe by extension, all the Princesses.”

They all looked to Twilight, who bit her lip. “I see,” she said. “Well, what about those other factors?”

“Ah, well,” Gadget said, picking up several more documents, “they have a factory where they can peaches, as well as a distillery where they make peach brandy, but they also manufacture a lot of more complex machinery, including pumps, engines, farming equipment, et cetera. They’re very wealthy, and they have access to other factories and ties to other ponies who could get them resources. And since they live in Mustangia, one of the most remote regions in Equestria with no major towns, they aren’t really under scrutiny. That covers all the criteria.”

They all nodded to each other. They had to admit that it seemed a fairly compelling argument.

Rarity cleared her throat. “It sounds cut and dry, Gadget,” she said, though she still wore a frown. “But I’ve seen the papers in this pile of documents Twilight received from the Royal Guard. They investigated them very thoroughly, at your urging no less, and found nothing. Is it possible that you might be wrong?”

“Well, of course it is,” Gadget said. She sighed, her ears drooping. “I mean, it makes sense, but that doesn’t really prove anything. And if the Royal Guard said they’re innocent, then I guess I must be wrong. I… I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to get everypony’s hopes up.”

Rainbow Dash grunted and gave a roll of her eyes as she leaned back in her chair. “Yeah, no offense or anything, but I’m not so sure that the Royal Guard is all that reliable.”

“Hey!” Twilight exclaimed, sitting straight up.

“Relax, Twilight, I don’t mean your brother, but just this year Wind Rider managed to get past three of those guys with a cake when he tried to frame me!”

“To be fair,” Pinkie said, crossing her forelegs, “cake is pretty distracting!”

Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes, but then she smirked and turned to Rarity. “Oh, and thanks again for helping me with that, Rares.”

“Oh, it was nothing, dear, really!” Rarity said, waving her hoof (though she wore a pleased smile while she did so). “Still,” she added, turning to face Twilight, “Rainbow Dash brings up a good point. Regardless of what you think about them, the Royal Guard are not infallible. Perhaps they missed something?”

“Well, th-that’s why,” Gadget said, tapping on some of the new documents she’d brought, “I thought we could look at some of these other machines. Maybe if we could narrow the list down further, or spot something that looks like it shares a design with Turing Test, then we--”

“What the hay?!” Applejack shouted suddenly, causing them all to jump out of their seats. “What is that contraption doin’ here?!”

They all gathered around Applejack to see what she was holding. Several of them gasped when they saw what it was.

It was a picture of the Super Speedy Cider Squeezy 6000.

“Gadget,” Twilight said, turning to the young mare, “why did you bring a picture of this?”

“Oh, well, I found a document about it being sold for scrap by a couple of travelling salesponies,” she replied. “And I found out that it was actually a modified version of… hang on…”

She searched through the documents and pictures and brought out another picture of a remarkably similar four-wheeled device. But rather than a massive cider-making mechanism in the back, it seemed to have two large barrels.

“Ah ha! This thing!” she said. “It’s a mechanized harvesting device used on the peach orchards of Mustangia! They can harvest the peaches, slice them, and pit them in seconds!”

“Yer sayin’ the Flim Flam brothers didn’t build the Super Speedy Cider Squeezy 6000?” Applejack said.

“Um… well, I don’t know who they are, but, essentially, yes. I mean, they modified the original design, which is still impressive, but it was based on this device. Which, as you’ve probably guessed, was made for exclusive use by the Mustang Peach family. They use it to harvest and process peaches for making preserves, pies, and stuff like that. Of course, they still harvest whole peaches the old-fashioned way…”

Applejack flipped through the pictures of the machine as Gadget spoke. She frowned, not sure how she felt to hear about the use of such machines on a larger scale on a family-owned farm. But then she came across a picture that made her freeze and her eyes bulge.

“Hold on there, sugarcube,” she said, holding up a hoof to silence Gadget. “I’ve seen this before!”

They looked and saw that she was holding up a picture of two thin glass bulbs attached to a metallic, rectangular device.

To their surprise, it was Twilight who spoke up. “Those bulbs convert magic into electrical energy. I remember experimenting with a similar device when we were putting Turing Test back together! Turing uses it to recharge her battery via magic if there’s no other power source nearby!” She rubbed her chin. “I thought they looked familiar back then, too, but I couldn’t remember why.”

“Same here, but now I do,” Applejack said. “They had some gizmos like this on the Cider Squeezy!”

Gadget gasped. “Wait, wait, wait… you said you have the pictures that you all took when you were cataloging Turing’s parts, right? If we compare them…”

A moment later, she had the picture of the device that was part of Turing and the picture of the device used on the peach harvester.

They all gawked in stunned silence.

“They match,” Twilight whispered. “They’re exactly the same!”

“Gadget,” Fluttershy said hesitantly, “I… I don’t mean to be pessimistic, but could somepony else have built the one Turing Test has? I mean, maybe it’s a coincidence.”

Gadget shook her head. “No, this is a unique model! No other company in Equestria makes one like this!”

“Then,” Fluttershy said, practically trembling with joy, “then we found them? The ponies who built Turing?”

“Ha ha, we did it!” Rainbow Dash exclaimed, leaping into the air and doing a loop de loop.

“Hoowee, we got ‘em!” Applejack cheered.

“We’re through the looking glass here, ponies,” Pinkie said, narrowing her eyes.

“Gadget, you did it!” Twilight said, embracing her. “You helped us crack the case!”

“O-oh, no, Twilight, I-- oof!” she grunted, blushing as Twilight held her tight. “I j-just brought you the new information. You’re the ones who actually made sense of it!”

Twilight felt a tap on her shoulder and looked to see Spike standing next to her. He’d been standing by quietly the whole time.

“Spike, isn’t this great? We might know where Turing Test is!”

“Yeah, it’s great,” he said, though the look on his face was less ecstatic than Twilight would have expected. “So, uh… what do we do now?”

“We go and get her, that’s what!” Rainbow shouted.

“Darn straight!” Applejack agreed, slamming her hooves on the table.

“Whoa, whoa, just hold on, everypony!” Twilight said, holding up her hooves. “You’re right, but if this conspiracy involves more than just this family, and it’s pretty clear that it does, then we might need some help.” She tapped her chin. “Spike, take a letter, please.”

Spike took up a paper and quill immediately. “Ready!” he said.

“Tell Celestia that I need to see her immediately. I want to discuss this with her face-to-face.”

***

“Mustangia,” Celestia said as she looked out the window. She and Twilight were seated in a small meeting room in Canterlot Castle that evening. “I had hoped this wasn’t true. When the Royal Guard said they’d found nothing, Twilight, I was honestly relieved to think that young Gadget had been wrong.”

She took a sip of her tea, and Twilight did the same. Twilight remembered this room well: it was where she had told Celestia that she would not allow Turing to be taken into custody. Now they were here again, and, once again, they were discussing Turing Test’s freedom. They looked out to see the golden glow of the setting sun.

“Is there something wrong with Mustangia, Princess?” Twilight gently asked.

“Mustangia was its own wild, lawless region until 200 years ago,” Celestia said. “It was in dire straits due to a drought and famine. It requested aid from Equestria, and we obliged. The efforts weren’t made easy due to how disorganized it was; different factions had different ties of loyalty and different ideas about who owned what trade route. Still, we did what we could, and eventually offered them the chance to join Equestria. They had no central government, as I said, so they founded a temporary confederacy to decide the issue. And, in the end, they accepted.”

She took another sip of tea.

“Barely.”

“Barely?” Twilight echoed. “I would have thought they would jump at the chance to join Equestria!”

“On the contrary, it was a slim majority vote.” She sighed. “For years, many ponies have spoken about the ‘good old days’ of an independent Mustangia. Such voices have grown quieter in recent years, but still… perhaps all this was due to such voices continuing to speak in secret.”

Twilight furrowed her brow. “I don’t like this. Turing didn’t ask to be caught up in all this.”

“None of us asked to be part of this, Twilight,” Celestia said as she heaved a sigh. “But as Princesses of Equestria, it is something we must deal with now.”

“So… what do you think we should do?” Twilight asked.

Celestia closed her eyes, tapping her chin. “We already sent the Royal Guard to investigate once. I worry that ordering another large-scale investigation might worsen relations with Mustangia and make any rebellious voices seem more legitimate in their mistrust. I will contact the local branch of the Guard and tell them to offer support and backup if you find anything, but for the time being, I suggest you simply tell anypony you ask that you’re there to solve a friendship problem.”

“Well, the Map didn’t send us, but that’s still technically true,” Twilight said, giving her a grin. “After all, Turing’s our friend, and finding her is our problem.”

Celestia was quiet for a moment. “There is… something else,” she said quietly.

“Yes?” Twilight asked.

“A group of Mustangian independence rebels and an old familiar grudge might be the background, but this may be something more personal,” she said, her expression turning sour. “It was a decade ago, but something occurred between myself and the current head of that family, a stallion named Cobbler Mustang.”

“Cobbler?” Twilight asked. “What happened?”

“I don’t want to say too much, Twilight, but I will say that he has suffered greatly, and though I had hoped that he had moved on, it’s possible that he is holding a powerful grudge against me, personally.” She heaved a sigh. “I thought of him when I saw Turing Test for the first time. I had the Guard investigate in Mustangia even before Gadget mentioned the possibility of his involvement. When he appeared to be innocent, I was relieved. I want to leave that poor pony alone in his old age.”

“But… Princess Celestia, I don’t understand.”

“If I tell you my side of the story,” Celestia said, looking down at her, “then I’m afraid he will be less inclined to confide or trust in you. You have a knack for making friends out of enemies, Twilight, so go, and find Professor Cobbler, and listen to him with an open mind. Perhaps he is innocent… and perhaps not. But if anypony can help him, it’s you. And he, in turn, may be able to help us.”

Twilight smiled. “I understand. I’ll do my best.”

Celestia nodded. “Then go with my blessing, and I wish you the best of luck. But please be careful,” she added, her expression growing serious. “If the ponies behind this are against Equestria, then they may not welcome the sight of a princess in their midst.”

She stood and went to Twilight, extending her wing around her.

“I know you are strong and capable, Twilight. But please be on your guard.”

Twilight bowed. “Thank you, Celestia. But don’t worry,” she said, giving her a confident smile. “My friends have never let me down, and we’re not going to let Turing Test or Equestria down now!”

Celestia laughed. “Very good. Although,” she said, raising an eyebrow mischievously, “it is a shame that you won’t be able to join us for the National Conference this weekend.”

Twilight’s eyes widened. “Oh my gosh, I forgot all about the Conference!” She paused, taking a deep breath. “Princess, I’m sorry, but this--”

“This takes priority, Twilight,” Celestia said, barely holding back her laughter. “I understand. Honestly, if I could avoid it and devote more effort to help you myself, I would. Besides, there will be other Conferences, but this might be our only chance to end this conspiracy once and for all. You should return to Ponyville now and prepare for the journey with your friends. I suggest taking the early morning train to get there. It will be a long journey…”

She paused, tapping her chin.

“Celestia?” Twilight asked, tilting her head.

She chuckled quietly. “Perhaps I know of a way to make it shorter.”

***

Twilight and her friends stood on the platform of the train station early the next morning, their saddlebags lightly packed and ready. Gadget and Spike were there as well. It was so early that Celestia hadn’t even begun to raise the sun.

“Aw man,” Rainbow Dash said with a yawn. “I didn’t think any trains came this early!”

“They don’t, usually,” Twilight said, rubbing her eyes. “But Princess Celestia said that she’d make arrangements for a train that would take us directly to Mustangia with no stops. If we’re lucky, we might make it there by lunchtime!”

“Ugh, don’t talk about lunch,” Rainbow grumbled as she patted her belly, “when I haven’t even had breakfast!”

“Maybe if ya wouldn’t sleep in so dang much,” Applejack said, “you wouldn’t be such a mess right now.”

“Hey, that’s--”

“Oh, look!” Fluttershy exclaimed, interrupting her. “It’s the train!”

Sure enough, over the darkened horizon, they spotted a plume of smoke. The slow chugging of the train and the distant moan of its whistle could be heard as it came down from the hills and toward Ponyville.

“Wait a minute,” Gadget gasped, “I know that train!”

As the sun slowly began to rise, they saw that they knew the train too. The familiar black and red train with gold trim slowed to a halt and stopped right in front of them. The words “COMMODORE” were still emblazoned on the side.

“Oh my!” Rarity exclaimed. “Mr. Vanderbull’s lent us his train?!”

“And what sort of gift would it be,” said a gruff, familiar voice, “if I didn’t deliver it myself?”

Sure enough, a familiar figure stepped down from the engine and onto the platform, the engineer of the train right behind him.

“Mr. Vanderbull!” Gadget exclaimed, her eyes lighting up with glee. She bounded over to him, practically bouncing on her hooves. “I can’t believe you’re lending Twilight and the others your private train!”

“Neither can I!” Twilight said, bowing to the towering minotaur. “You’re too kind.”

He held up his hand and shook his head. “Not at all, my friends. These conspirators have committed acts of brutality and terrorism against you, against Turing Test, against my dear assistant, my business, and our nation! I would gladly donate a hundred trains toward putting an end to their plans!”

“You mean we get our own train?!” Rainbow Dash exclaimed. “Awesome!”

“And it has a sleeper car and a dining car!” Rarity added. “Now this is the way to travel!”

The engineer cleared his throat. “Um, pardon me, but… Princess Celestia ordered changes to the train schedules the entire way down to Mustangia so we could slip in between the other trains. We need to go quickly, or we’re going to miss the window of opportunity she gave us.”

“Quite right,” Vanderbull said, giving a stern nod. “Please take this train with my blessing. I wish I could join you, but I’m afraid I have business in Manehattan that I can’t avoid. I’ll take the next public train back in an hour.”

The others thanked him and began to board.

Gadget looked between Twilight and Vanderbull. She took a deep breath, steeling herself, and loudly declared, “I’m going too!”

They all froze and looked at her.

“Gadget,” Twilight sighed, “you can’t. This could be dangerous!”

“Maybe so,” she said, thrusting her chin out and placing a hoof on her chest while she put a pair of mechanical hands on her hips. “But if these ponies are experts in technology, then you might need some extra help. Besides, what if Turing’s still damaged? You’ll need somepony who knows how to repair her!”

Twilight opened her mouth to say something, but then closed it. “Well…” She looked to Vanderbull for help.

Vanderbull just chuckled and shrugged his shoulders. “I doubt even I could dissuade her, Twilight Sparkle.” He looked down at Gadget, who was beaming up at him.

“You mean I have your permission, sir?”

“Of course,” he said, kneeling down to her level. He gave her a hug. “Just be careful… and if you see that ruffian who hurt you, give him a mechanical fist in the muzzle for me!”

She grinned. “Gladly, sir!”

Then Spike loudly declared, “If Gadget’s going, then I am too!”

“What?!” Twilight cried. “But Spike--”

“Hey, we’re going to the most distant region in Equestria! If something goes wrong, I’m the only one who can send a letter to Celestia instantly, no matter what! Besides, if one assistant gets to go, why not me?”

He folded his arms and looked at her smugly.

“I… that is…”

The engineer cleared his throat and tapped his large pocket watch.

“Oh for the love of… fine! Come on, Gadget, Spike, let’s get going!”

She galloped onto the train. Gadget and Spike looked at each other and bumped fists (one scaly, the other metal).

As Vanderbull waved to them, the train built up steam and began to move, trundling down the tracks until it picked up speed, rocketing away from Ponyville.

Twilight watched the town recede into the distance as they all sped onwards toward parts unknown and, hopefully, to the place where Turing Test was waiting for them all.

To be continued...

Author's Notes:

It seems Twilight and her friends are on the right track, but what will they find in Mustangia?...

Well, guess what's back! That's right: References!

-The title is a reference to a song suggested by editor GenerousGypsy called "Monody" by The Fat Rat. It may be a bit upbeat for a chapter that starts off on such a melancholy note, but it has the right mix of somber, wistful, and hopeful tones that I decided, eh, what the heck. The title fits in a way too, since, as he explained, "It's a song performed solo in a Greek tragedy, or a poem lamenting a person's death." (Note: No, Turing is not dead.) Thanks for the suggestion, GG!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=B7xai5u_tnk

-Bulk Biceps yelling his own name is a reference to the movie Shrek 2, but also a bit to The Rocky Horror Picture Show, though technically Pinkie did this joke first in "The Lost Treasure of Griffonstone."

-Once again, the Doctor's favorite candies are Jelly Babies, referencing Doctor Who.

-The magazine Scientific Equestrian, again, references the real magazine Scientific American, but the cover also references another one of my stories, "Running Free Across the Plain."

-The Mustang Peach family members named so far have two naming themes. It should be at least a little obvious, but one is that they're named after peach-based foods, and also after the Ford Mustang, the car named after the wild horses (thus typifying the designation of "pony cars"): Dearborn Crumble is named after the city where Mustangs are built in Michigan and the desert Peach Crumble. Cobbler is named after, you guessed it, Peach Cobbler. However, there is a bit more to the name...

-Last of all, Pinkie saying "We're through the looking glass, here, ponies," is a reference to Oliver Stone's film JFK, which features Jim Garrison saying, upon thinking he's unraveled the conspiracy, "We're through the looking glass," and also Milhouse from The Simpsons parodying that line.

See you next time, folks!

Jigsaw Falling Into Place, Part 1

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Outside the window of the train, the scenery rushed by in a blur. Rolling hills gave way to overgrown swamps and wetlands, which in turn gave way to wide open prairies and savannas. Twilight had spent the early part of the trip just staring outside until the others had convinced her to spend time with them, passing the time with idle conversations or a few games.

Vanderbull’s private train had indeed proved to be luxurious travelling. Besides the engine, there was the observation car with its broad windows, the dining car which was stocked with a supply of fresh food and premade snacks, and the sleeper car where Rainbow Dash had spent the first part of the trip and where Spike was still sleeping.

In the meantime, the girls were playing a game called Mane Star Holdem that Gadget had learned from watching Mr. Vanderbull play with his business partners.

“Okay, and here’s the river,” Gadget said, laying the card on the table.

“Shoot!” Applejack grunted. “I fold.”

“I’m out too,” Rainbow Dash grumbled, laying her cards on the table.

“Just you and me, Gadget,” Twilight said.

Gadget smiled. “Think you’ve got some good cards, eh?”

Twilight’s expression was as still as a statue.

“Oh my!” Rarity laughed. “I never suspected you of having such a perfect poker face, Twilight!”

“It helps when you’ve read Amarillo Slim’s Rules and Strategies of Poker a time or two,” Twilight replied.

She stared at Gadget, her gaze practically boring into her.

Gadget bit her lip. “Th-then I bet 5!”

“I’ll see it,” Twilight said, tossing a chip into the center pile, “and raise you ten more.”

Gadget glanced down at her cards, then back up at Twilight. One of her mechanical hands pushed her glasses up her muzzle. “Ten? Either you’ve got a great set of cards or you’re bluffing harder than any princess ever should.”

“It’ll cost you ten chips to find out which one,” Twilight said. “So?”

Gadget swallowed. “All right… I…”

The others all leaned in.

“I call!” she exclaimed, tossing in her bet. “So, what do you have?”

Twilight set down her cards. “Four of a kind,” she said, her grin widening.

“Oooh!” the others all said.

“W-what?!” Gadget cried. “Aww…”

“Sorry, Gadget,” Twilight chuckled, enveloping the chips with her magic. “But you shouldn’t--”

“--grab the chips before you’ve seen everypony’s cards?” Gadget asked, her shocked expression melting away. “I agree.” She tossed her cards on the table. “Straight Flush.”

“Huh?!” Twilight gasped. “B-but you were acting so--”

“Flustered?” Gadget asked, as she gathered up the chips. “I figured if I couldn’t crack your poker face, I’d just lull you into a false sense of security. ‘T-then I bet 5!’” She laughed at her own affected stuttering.

“Ohhh, she got you good, Twilight!” Rainbow Dash laughed.

Twilight sighed, but smiled. “Yeah, I guess she did.”

Just then, Spike burst in from the sleeper car.

“Everypony! Everypony look!” he exclaimed as he ran in.

“Oh, welcome back, Spike,” Fluttershy said. “Did you enjoy your nap?”

“Yeah, but when I woke up, I looked out the window, and… well, look for yourself!”

They all turned, and their eyes bulged at what they saw.

“Ooh, pretty!” Pinkie exclaimed, bounding over to the window. “And my favorite color, too!”

Outside the window were hundreds and hundreds of trees, their branches completely covered with bright pink blossoms. As the wind blew through them, some of their petals dropped and took to the wind in a billowing pink storm.

“They’re gorgeous,” Rarity breathed, pressing her face to the window. “What are they?”

“Magnolia trees,” Applejack replied quietly. She smiled and laughed a little. “I’ve never seen so many of ‘em together.”

Twilight was just as awed as the rest of them, but her smile began to fade and her expression became stern.

Fluttershy was the first to notice. “Twilight? What is it?” she asked.

“We’re at the Great Magnolia Fields,” she said, “which means we’ve just crossed the border of Mustangia.”

They all turned to face her, their own expressions turning more serious.

“We’re getting close, huh?” Rainbow Dash asked. She took to the air, stretching her wings and legs with a grunt. “I can’t wait! We’ve been cooped up in this train all day, and I can’t wait to get my hooves on the ponies who took Tee!”

“Do you think there will be a lot of ponies looking for us?” Fluttershy asked, fidgeting with her hair.

“Or maybe,” Spike said, wringing his claws, “more robots?”

“Or maybe even a giant robot!” Pinkie exclaimed.

Gadget whipped her head around and seized Pinkie’s hoof. “Ooh, do you really think so?” she asked, her eyes lighting up. “Maybe a big purple bionic one that you can pilot!”

“Uh, maybe y’all shouldn’t sound so excited about it,” Applejack grumbled, rolling her eyes.

Twilight cleared her throat. When she had their attention, she continued.

“Listen, everypony,” she said, “for right now, the plan is that we’re not going to take the train directly into town. We’re going to stop the train on a passing siding to get it off the main track.”

“What the heck’s a passing siding?” Rainbow Dash asked.

Gadget perked up. “It’s a loop where trains can get off the main track and let other trains pass in one direction or the other. I read the map with Twilight and the engineer, and there’s a passing siding not far from Mustang City. We can park the train in the woods and then go into town on hoof!”

“I suppose that would be a bit less conspicuous,” Rarity said, rubbing her chin as she considered the idea. “So, you think we should simply walk into town?”

Twilight nodded. “I think we’d attract too much attention if we showed up in a private train like this. Especially since it isn’t our private train.”

They all nodded.

“After that, we’ll find the Royal Guard outpost, discuss strategies, and then see where we can find the Mustang Peach farm. Maybe if we find the head of the family, Cobbler Mustang, we can get to the bottom of this mystery and find Turing Test.”

Applejack raised an eyebrow. “Ya really think this guy will just admit to buildin’ Turing Test an’ her brother, an’ plottin’ against Equestria?”

“I’m not sure that he’s necessarily guilty,” Twilight said. She sighed. “But if he is, then maybe we can catch him before this goes any further. And if he’s not guilty, then maybe he has some idea who is. Either way, we don’t have any other leads, so we might as well be direct.

“Just the same, though, I don’t want him to know we’re coming, which is why we’re sneaking into town, more or less.”

“Umm…”

They all turned to look at Gadget, who was raising a mechanical finger.

“What if they recognize you?”

They all stared back at her.

“W-well, it’s just that you’re national heroes… and Twilight’s an alicorn, so… you know, that’s hard to miss.”

They all exchanged looks.

“Ya know,” Pinkie said, tapping her chin, “she’s right. It’s kinda weird how little that comes up.”

Gadget smacked her forehead. “Look, this is easy enough to fix,” she said. She galloped out of the car and then returned with a black jacket identical to the one she was wearing. She gave it to Twilight.

“You brought another jacket?” Twilight asked.

“Having mechanical arms really wears them out, so I bring spares,” Gadget replied. “But the point is, if you wear it…”

Twilight put the jacket on and noticed what Gadget meant.

“...it covers my wings!”

“Exactly! Now at least you’re just a unicorn… nothing out of the ordinary!”

“Good thinking, Gadget,” Twilight said. “Okay, everypony, let’s get ready. The sooner we get started…”

Here she narrowed her eyes and took on a hard grin.

“...the sooner we find Turing Test.”

***

Mustangia City was less a city and more of a village, they found. They wandered in from the woods surrounding the place and strolled up the main street through town. On either side of the street were wooden buildings, including a few clothing stores, a clock shop, an antique store, a pharmacy and malt shop, a general store, the Sheriff’s office, a saloon, and many more.

The first thing they noticed was that the buildings were all painted brightly, with bold whites, reds, oranges, and blues. Several of the shops hung a strange-looking flag near their door or in their window. The flag had three broad horizontal stripes - red, white, then red again - with a blue field in the top left corner with a golden horseshoe surrounded by bits of what looked like barbed wire.

“You know,” Rarity whispered, “I thought this place might be… well, I wasn’t certain what to expect, but this village is actually rather lovely!”

“It is very colorful,” Fluttershy said. Many ponies were walking about that day and several of them waved, tipped their hats, or said hello to them when they passed. Fluttershy smiled and waved back. “And friendly, too!”

“Probably just trying to lull us into a false sense of security,” Rainbow Dash grumbled, her eyes shifting from one side of the street to another.

But Pinkie shook her head. “They sure don’t look like they’re faking it!” she said. “I still remember all those phony baloney smiles when we went to Starlight Glimmer’s village, but these smiles look A-OK to me!”

“Maybe,” Twilight said, narrowing her eyes as she looked upwards, “but it’s not the smiles that caught my attention.”

She pointed with her hoof, and it was then that they noticed that tall wooden poles were lined up behind the buildings. Strewn from them were long black wires that ran to practically every building.

Gadget’s eyes widened. “Electrical wires?” she asked aloud. “No, wait… those are--”

There was a loud ringing from one of the shops, and her head jerked up in recognition. She dashed over to the window to see what it was. She waved the others over to see what she’d spotted.

In the window, a unicorn was holding a strange conical device up to his ear as he spoke into a thing that looked like a black candlestick. He looked over at the group of them in the window and smiled at them, giving a little wave before turning his attention back to the device.

“A telephone!” Gadget exclaimed.

“A what now?” Applejack asked. “Ya mean a telegraph?”

“No,” Twilight replied, frowning as she rubbed her chin. “That’s a telephone. It’s a machine that converts sound to electrical signals and back.”

“Oh, like a record, right?”

Gadget nodded excitedly. “Right, except it does it in real time! That pony’s talking to another pony somewhere else! Wow, I knew that they were using these inside some of the bigger buildings in Manehattan, and we’re even getting them installed at Vanderbull Industries next year, but to think this whole town would be wired up like that! Incredible!”

Twilight bit her lip, deciding not to mention that she knew of a place where telephones were extremely common, wireless, and capable of much more than just letting two individuals talk to each other.

“That’s really cool, Gadget!” Spike said.

“Yeah! I could call Mom and Dad all the time with that!” Pinkie exclaimed. Then she frowned. “Wait, why haven’t I heard of these thingies before? It seems like everypony would want one!”

Gadget opened her mouth, then shut it when she saw Twilight’s expression.

“W-well, you see…” she mumbled.

Twilight sighed. “Princess Celestia issued her opinion on them after their inventor, Gray Bell, demonstrated them for her. She said that she couldn’t imagine a future where ponies would talk into scratchy-sounding tubes in rooms by themselves with ugly wires hung between buildings like cobwebs when they could express themselves better with letters.”

“Not to mention the telegraph company propaganda,” Gadget said, “that told ponies that it would make you go deaf or that other ponies could listen in on your conversations.” She scoffed, rolling her eyes. “After that, almost nopony wanted to invest in them. What a waste.”

The others fell silent for a moment, before Rarity said, “Oh, dear. Forgive me, Twilight, but doesn’t this story sound a bit… familiar?”

“If you mean that it sounds a lot like what happened with Celestia and the invention of the farming automaton,” Twilight said, her expression turning sour, “then you’re right.”

Fluttershy glanced back at the pony speaking into the phone through the window. “Well, if that’s true,” she said, “then why do all these ponies have them?”

“Because maybe,” Twilight said, “they don’t care what Celestia thinks.”

They let that sink in before they started up the street again.

“Come on, everypony,” Twilight said. “Spike, do you have the map that shows us where to find the Royal Guard outpost?”

Spike held up the map proudly. “Got it right here, Twilight!”

“Twilight?!” a voice cried. “And is that… it is!”

They all turned and saw a yellow pony with a green mane and a pink blouse galloping over to them. They froze when they saw who it was.

“Oh!” Twilight said, laughing nervously. “It’s you, um… Miss…”

“Ms. Peachbottom!” she said, coming up and shaking Twilight’s hoof vigorously. “My golly, I never would’ve expected to see y’all come here! Ain’t that just the nicest surprise!”

They all wore forced smiles as more and more ponies on the street turned to see what the commotion was about.

“Lan’ sakes, last time I saw you was when y’all showed me around the Crystal Empire!” she went on. “An’ if that wasn’t just the nicest surprise a humble chicken farmer like myself ever did receive! Why just today, I woke up thinkin’ about it an’ wonderin’ just what the hay y’all were up to, then lo’ and behold, I come here to buy more feed for my yardbirds an’ here y’all are!”

“I-it’s very nice to see you too,” Twilight said, forcing herself to smile. “B-but you see, we--”

“Oh, but you must be just roastin’ in that jacket, Twilight!” Ms. Peachbottom went on. Then her eyes lit up. “Oh my goodness, an’ that’s right… last time I saw you, you were just an ordinary, everyday unicorn, but now, you’re a princess!”

Rainbow Dash smacked her forehead as more ponies around gasped and started gabbing excitedly. “Welp, our cover’s blown,” she grumbled. “So much for the element of surprise.”

“Twilight’s the Element of Magic, Dashie,” Pinkie said, rolling her eyes.

“No, I mean… oh, never mind!”

Ms. Peachbottom, meanwhile was still fawning over Twilight. “Now, I hate to ask, but… can I see ‘em? Your wings, I mean? Oh, I bet they are just gorgeous!”

Twilight sighed. It was too late to conceal their identities now, so, if they had to make a run for it or something, it would be better to not have the jacket weighing her down. Using her magic, she removed the jacket and spread her wings wide.

The crowd gasped and shouted in surprise.

Applejack tensed up. “Get ready, y’all…”

Then the crowd erupted into cheers.

“It’s Princess Twilight!”

“And her friends!”

“Our heroes!”

“Ooh, ooh, will you sign my hat?!”

“Is Rarity the one with the mechanical arms?”

To their mutual surprise, the ponies of Mustangia were anything but displeased to see them. Despite their suspicions of hating royalty, they appeared to be huge fans of Twilight and her friends. A few of them were likewise impressed with Gadget’s mechanical arms and asked some surprisingly knowledgeable questions about how they worked.

Amid all the chaos, a loud whistle was heard, and they all turned to see a bright green unicorn wearing gold-colored armor.

“I see you’ve met the locals, Your Highness,” he said. “Allow me to introduce myself. I’m Chief Sergeant Sea Hawk of the Royal Guard.”

The crowd quieted down at the sight of him.

Twilight stepped forward, smiling at him. “It’s good to meet you, Chief Sergeant. I’m Twilight Sparkle, and these are my friends.”

“Yes, we received the telegram from Her Majesty,” he said, giving the rest of them a brief nod. “Though Princess Celestia didn’t mention that you’d be bringing your assistant and…” he raised an eyebrow at Gadget, “...a guest?”

Gadget trotted forward. “Hello, sir!” she said, saluting with one of her mechanical hands. “I’m Gadgette F. Giroux, but you can call me Gadget!”

“She’s a friend of ours,” Twilight explained.

“Ah, I see,” he said, his expression softening. He bowed to them. “Then, in that case, if you’ll come with me to the outpost, we can discuss the matter at hoof.”

“Oooh!” Ms. Peachbottom said. “I didn’t know y’all were here for business! I thought this was just a little vay-cay!”

“I wish,” Applejack said, tipping her hat to her as they all began to follow Sea Hawk. “Let’s just say we’re here for a friendship problem an’ leave it at that.”

“Well, when that’s finished, do us a favor and stay awhile!” she replied. “I guarantee you, you don’t know hospitality until you’ve sampled Mustang hospitality!”

***

The outpost was little more than a small, two-story building on the outskirts of town. On the ground floor was the front desk, a bulletin board with wanted posters (none of which any of them recognized), a meeting room, and a lounge. The second floor, they were told, contained the individual quarters of each guardspony.

“We don’t usually get a lot of visitors or much attention,” Sea Hawk said as they entered the outpost. “Mostly we spend our time following up on tax collection, chasing down moonshiners, or searching for banned substances.”

Behind the front desk was a tall, husky yellow earth pony stallion. Leaning on the counter chatting with him was a purple pegasus mare with her helmet off.

“Look alive, Buttercup, Violet Wisp!” Sea Hawk barked. “Her Highness is here!”

The mare put her helmet on, and she and the earth pony stood at attention.

“Sir, yes sir!” they both said, saluting him.

“This is Corporal Violet Wisp,” Sea Hawk said, gesturing to the pegasus mare, “and Private First Class Buttercup. Guards, this is Princess Twilight and her companions, including her assistant Spike the Dragon and Miss Gadget, who’s on loan from Cornelius Vanderbull.”

“It’s nice to meet you, Your Highness!” Violet Wisp said, her voice an energetic rasp.

“And thank you for visiting our outpost!” Buttercup chirped, his voice comparatively tiny and even childlike for how large he was.

“We’re going to review the plan with our guests,” Sea Hawk said. “Violet, go find Orange Slice. Buttercup, bring our guests some coffee.”

“Yes, sir!” they both said.

After that, Sea Hawk led them back to the meeting room, which was a round table surrounded by maps and notes and locations placed on bulletin boards all around them, as well as several tall filing cabinets.

“You have a nice outpost,” Twilight said, smiling at him. “It reminds me of the outpost my brother worked at a while back before he became Captain.”

“He must have worked very hard to get that position,” Sea Hawk said, taking off his helmet to reveal an upswept mane of bright blue hair. He smiled. “Still, you do our little outpost too much credit. There’s nothing terribly important out here, so mostly just the four of us keep an eye on things.”

“I think it’s awesome!” Rainbow Dash said, looking around eagerly. “You’re like a bunch of detectives, pursuing leads, tracking down bad guys, and bringing ‘em in!”

Sea Hawk chuckled. “I think you’ve got a romanticized version of things. Most of the time, we’re just waiting around for something to happen. This is a nice spot, but the locals… well, they don’t have a good history with the Royal Guard.”

“Why not?” Twilight asked.

Sea Hawk sighed. “It’s all friendliness and smiles until we’re knocking on a neighbor’s door, asking why they haven’t paid their taxes, or uncovering an illegal still in somepony’s barn. Then we’re just ‘The Feds,’ come to push around hard-working folks.”

This was the first anti-government talk they’d heard since they’d arrived, and they all exchanged a look at it.

All, that is, except for Gadget, whose cheeks were flushed as she stared up at the handsome sergeant.

“S-so,” she said, breaking the silence. “You must get lonely out here, if the townsponies don’t trust you.”

“Oh… very lonely,” he said, leaning down toward her as he stared deep into her eyes.

“S-sergeant Sea Hawk,” she murmured, holding out her hoof.

Then she felt a poke in her ribs and snapped out of her daydream when she saw Rarity giving her a stern look.

“H-huh?” she asked, looking around. “Oh! Um, you were saying, Sergeant Sea Hawk?”

“I, uh…” He looked down at her, raising an eyebrow. “I was saying that it’s not so bad out here. The other guards are good company.”

Rarity elbowed her. “Darling,” she whispered, “he is rather dashing, but please try to stay grounded.”

“R-right,” she whispered back, scrunching inward.

The door opened, and Buttercup entered with a carafe and several coffee cups. Behind him were Violet Wisp and another pegasus, an orange stallion.

“Reporting for duty, Sarge!” the newcomer said.

Sea Hawk narrowed his eyes.

“Er, Sergeant Sea Hawk!” he said, saluting as he corrected himself.

“Better,” Sea Hawk grunted. “Okay, let’s get down to business.”

Twilight stood. “To be brief, we’re looking for my friend Turing Test.”

“The mechanical pony,” Violet Wisp said, giving a nod. “We heard that in the report, Your Highness.”

“You can call me Twilight,” she said.

Violet looked to Sea Hawk, who gave her a nod. “Twilight, then,” she said, smiling. “And the point is that you think the Mustang Peach family built her and then stole--”

“Kidnapped.”

“--kidnapped her.”

Twilight and the others nodded.

“Oh, I don’t know about that,” Buttercup said, frowning as he poured some coffee for Gadget, who took it eagerly. “The Mustang Peaches were awfully understanding the last time we had an investigation.”

“Yeah, which wasn’t easy!” Orange Slice said, rolling his eyes. “All those stuck-up Canterlot guards practically turned the whole region upside-down looking for evidence of a conspiracy!”

“Private Slice!” Sea Hawk snapped. “They were just doing their job.”

“You’ve got to admit, though, Sarge,” Violet said, rolling her eyes, “they sure didn’t want much of our input during the investigation, even though we’re the local outpost.”

Sea Hawk made a sour face at the term ‘Sarge.’

“Look now,” Applejack said, getting to her hooves. “We ain’t here to accuse anypony or get in the middle o’ yer troubles with the Canterlot guards. We’re just here to find our friend.”

“You said it, AJ!” Rainbow Dash exclaimed. “So, enough talk!” Here she pounded on the table. “I say we go pay that family a visit and make ‘em tell us what they know!”

“Rainbow Dash!” Twilight snapped. “Don’t be rude! I would like to get the Guards’ input before we go anywhere!”

Rainbow Dash grumbled, crossing her forelegs as she sulked in her seat. Applejack also sat back down, trying to calm herself.

“We understand your concern,” Sea Hawk said, “and we think we know the best course of action. We believe that you should proceed to the Mustang Peach family home on their orchard without us.”

They all stared at him.

“Um, not to be rude,” Fluttershy said, raising an eyebrow, “but are you really sure that’s such a good idea?”

“Oh, believe me,” Sea Hawk said, “you’d be better off without us there.”

“Sarge is right,” Violet Wisp agreed. “They’ve made it clear that they’re tired of us coming around, talking to their workers, disrupting their farming and their factories, and all that.”

“Aw, come on!” Orange Slice shouted. “We shouldn’t care what they think!”

“But Orange Slice,” Buttercup said, “if we push them around, they might cooperate even less, and they won’t trust anyone with us, like Princess Twilight and her friends.”

“Exactly my thinking, Buttercup,” Sea Hawk said. He turned back to Twilight. “I’ll escort you to their orchard. It’s just up the big dirt road outside of town. But once we’re there, we’ll leave you to it. If there’s trouble, then use this.”

He used his magic to levitate open a supply cabinet and bring out a small glass vial.

“This is a magical signal flare. If you need us, throw it to the ground and smash it, and it will send a bright flare into the sky that can be seen from anywhere within a dozen kilometers for twenty minutes.”

Twilight frowned. “If you really think it would be best for us to go on our own,” she said hesitantly.

“I do,” Sea Hawk said. He sighed. “Listen, I’ll be blunt… Professor Cobbler Mustang is the most powerful pony in Mustangia, and while he’s kind and patient, he has very little love for the Royal Guard or Her Majesty, Princess Celestia. But I happen to know that he holds you and your friends in high regard. If you are going to get any cooperation from him in this investigation, it would be wise to stay on his good side.”

“Unless he’s the pony responsible,” Rainbow Dash muttered.

“If he is, then we’ll deal with that when the time comes,” Twilight said. “In the meantime, Sergeant Sea Hawk, we’ll take your advice. And your signal flare,” she said, passing it to Pinkie.

“I’ll keep it nice and safe, Twilight!” Pinkie said, placing the vial into her mane and letting it sink into its depths.

“All right, let’s go!” Spike exclaimed, getting up from the table.

“Hold on,” Twilight said, holding up her hoof. “Spike, I want you to stay here. It’s like you said earlier, nopony can get a letter to Celestia quicker than you, so I want you to stay here at the outpost where it’s safe. Gadget, I want you to stay with Spike.”

“What?!” she cried. “But what if--”

“Gadget, listen,” Twilight said, cutting her off. “You’re the only one around here who can help fix Turing Test if we need to. And if something happens to you, then I’m not sure that there’s anypony else for a few hundred kilometers who could help us. Besides,” she added with a smirk, “I don’t think I could face Mr. Vanderbull if you got hurt helping us out.”

Gadget sighed. “All right,” she said quietly. “I guess Spike and I will hold down the fort.”

“Guess so,” Spike said, resting his face in his claws irritably.

“We’ll get you both set up in a spare room,” Sea Hawk said. “Princess Twilight, if you and the rest of your friends are ready, we’ll leave immediately.”

***

Sea Hawk saw them to the gateway to the orchard, and soon the six of them were making their way down the dirt road through the peach orchard. All around them, tall, verdant trees were filled with bright red and yellow fruit ripening on every branch. A warm breeze blew through the trees, rustling their leaves as the six walked under a bright blue and perfectly cloudless sky.

“Hoo-wee,” Applejack said, looking up at the trees appreciatively. “Those are some fine lookin’ peaches!”

“One would hope so,” Rarity said, “considering they were grown by a family named after them.”

“By the way,” Fluttershy said, flying up next to Twilight, “why is this place called Mustangia? Is it named after the Mustang Peach family?”

Twilight turned to smile broadly at her. “Actually, I did a little research on the subject!” she said excitedly. “The region was named for the Mustang clan, one of the most powerful clans in the region before integration into Equestria. They were wild, nomadic ponies who roamed the open plains! The explorers and traders from Equestria just named the region after them, and to this very day they call the wild, free-spirited ponies of the region ‘mustangs!’”

Fluttershy nodded. “That’s interesting,” she said, “but does that mean the Mustang Peaches are named after them?”

“I have no idea, but…” Then she paused, raising her head as her ears twitched.

There was a loud, rumbling sound coming from behind them. They looked and saw that something large was passing on the other side of the trees lining the road. As it got closer, they saw that something was sucking the peaches right off the branches. They watched, transfixed as the thing passed, barely visible between the trunks as it sped by.

“What the hay was that?!” Applejack demanded.

“Let me see!” Rainbow Dash shouted, and took to the air. She flew over the treetops and followed the thing. When she zoomed in front of it, she saw that it was some kind of four-wheeled vehicle with a funnel on top and off to the side. It was vacuuming the peaches right off the branches and into a huge cylindrical container on the back. A brown unicorn stallion in overalls and a wide-brimmed hat was driving it.

“Hey!” she yelled, waving her forelegs.

Somehow the pony heard her over the noise of the machine and looked up. He widened his eyes a moment, then smiled and brought the machine to a stop.

“Well, howdy there, Miss!” he said, getting out of the machine. “Can I help you with somethin’?”

Rainbow Dash landed just as the others caught up to them.

“Sorry to bother you, sir!” Twilight said. “But my friends and I--”

“Now hold the phone!” the stallion said, a huge grin on his face. “Why, you’re Princess Twilight! My my my, I never thought I’d see the day when a pony like you would be in a place like this!”

Twilight blushed and held up her hooves. “No, no, I’m just an ordinary pony like anypony else,” she said.

Applejack, meanwhile, was eyeing the machine with distaste, her eyes narrowed and her lips pursed.

“Guess around these parts, y’all don’t go harvestin’ yer fruit the traditional way,” she said.

“Well, not these at least,” the stallion said. “These here peaches are gonna be used for the peach brandy. We’re mostly gonna juice ‘em up anyway, not sell ‘em or use ‘em in a pie or jam or somethin’ else. The ones we use fo’ the market and such, we buck the trees but good. Not me, though, on account of bein’ a unicorn. We leave that to the earth pony workers.”

Applejack blinked. “Oh,” she said. “I… sorry, I guess I just didn’t realize…”

“Oh, pshaw, you don’t gotta apologize none, missy!” the stallion said. “Now, how can I help you nice mares?”

“Well, sir,” Twilight said, taking a deep breath, “we’re actually looking for Professor Cobbler.”

“Then you are on the right path, Princess! The big house is just up the way!” he replied. “But tell you what… it’s much shadier and more pleasant if you walk through the trees. Just cut through right this way,” he said, raising his hoof to point the way, “an’ you will be at the Professor’s house in no time! Feel free to grab a peach or two on the way, if you like; I’m sure he won’t mind!”

He was about to go back to his work when Fluttershy cleared her throat.

“Excuse me, sir?” she asked. “I’m sorry to ask, but… you work for Professor Cobbler, right?”

“Yes, that’s right,” he said, nodding, though he raised an eyebrow at the question. “Why do you ask?”

“It’s just that,” she paused, rubbing her chin. “Well, what sort of pony is he? Is he, um… nice?”

“Nice?” the stallion repeated. Then he started to laugh. “Oh, young lady, I suppose you must not know much about him! Why, Cobbler Mustang is one of the nicest, most generous ponies I ever worked fo’!”

“Yes, it does seem that many ponies hold him in high regard,” Rarity said. “But could you perhaps give a more specific example?”

“Surely!” he said, removing his hat and placing it over his chest. “Fo’ one thing, Mr. Cobbler pays all his farmhooves ten bits more an hour than anypony in Mustangia! An’ when my wife an’ I were havin’ a baby, he gave her a whole year of maternity leave, an’ he gave me six months, with no cut in wage at all!”

They all gawked at him.

“That’s…” Rarity began, before shaking her head. “That’s--”

“That’s wonderful!” Fluttershy exclaimed. “Oh, he must be the nicest boss in all Equestria!”

“That’s what most of us say, missy!” The stallion gave them a nod before climbing back into the harvester. “I apologize, but I really must get back to work. Y’all take care now, hear?”

They all bid him goodbye and waved to him as he started the giant machine, charging it with his magic, and drove it off, continuing to harvest the peaches.

As they went on their way, Fluttershy had a little extra bounce in her step.

“This pony we’re looking for sounds very nice,” she said.

“Maybe,” Rainbow Dash said, turning in midair to hover just ahead of her, “or maybe he just acts that way so nopony will know that he’s really some evil mad scientist!”

“Oh come on now, Dashie!” Fluttershy said, pouting at her. “We need to give this pony a chance!”

“We will,” Rainbow Dash said, “but if we find out he’s the one that took Tee…” She punched one hoof into the other.

“I’d rather this didn’t devolve into violence,” Rarity said, “but I’m inclined to agree. Just thinking of what that metal brute did to Turing…”

They all fell silent, each one remembering the awful sight that had greeted them the last time they’d seen Turing Test.

“I sure hope we find Rinny,” Pinkie said, managing a smile.

“Me too, Pinkie,” Twilight said. “Me too.”

They carried on a bit further, and then Twilight stopped suddenly. So suddenly, in fact, that the others nearly ran into her.

“Twilight?” Rarity asked, stepping around her. “What is it, darling? Did you find… oh.”

They all stepped out from the trees into a clearing. Only it wasn’t merely a clearing.

It was a graveyard.

Dozens of tombstones were arranged in rows. The ones near the back of the graveyard were ancient and worn, the names slightly eroded and difficult to see. Others near the front were more polished and still bright. A black iron fence surrounded the area, and they stepped around it to go through the front gate.

“Why would there be a graveyard in a place like this?” Rarity asked, lowering her head, her ears laid flat.

“M-maybe,” Pinkie Pie said, her eyes wide and looking about fearfully, “this is where they bury anypony who gets in the way of their eeeevil plans!”

“Evil plans?” Twilight asked, looking back at her, one eyebrow raised doubtfully.

“No, no, ‘eeeevil’ plans,” she replied. “There’s a difference.”

Twilight rolled her eyes and went up to a large headstone. “Hmm. ‘Dearborn Crumble,’” she said, reading the name on it. “So, this is where the original creator of the farming automaton is buried.”

She stared at it for a moment. Then, feeling somehow compelled to, she actually lowered her head and bowed to the pony buried there.

“Uh, Twi? What are you doing?” Rainbow asked.

“It’s just…” She paused, trailing off. Then she smiled and looked up at her. “If this is the pony who built some of the automata that led to Turing Test’s creation, then I guess in some weird way we have him to thank for her.”

The others all exchanged glances, then lined up next to Twilight and likewise bowed before the tombstone.

“So that’s what this place is,” Applejack said, looking at the names of the ponies buried there. “This here’s a family graveyard. I guess the other Mustang Peaches are all buried here.”

Twilight went to another large tombstone, this one closer to the front of the graveyard. It read “Fjord Mustang,” and listed him as dying 35 years ago.

“Let’s see… ‘Beloved Industrialist and Community Leader. Husband to Savanna Flower, Brother to Sarah Bellum, and Father to Cobbler Mustang.’”

She frowned. “So… his father’s dead.”

“Oh,” Pinkie said somberly, pointing at another nearby grave. “I found his mom, too. She died even earlier.” She sniffled. “That’s so sad…”

They looked at a few more gravestones before making their way to a large, spire-shaped gravestone with a white carved statue of a young filly sitting serenely atop it.

“Hmm?” Twilight said, stepping around it. “Who--”

“And just what do you all think you’re doin’ here?”

They all yelped and whirled around to look at the speaker. A pink earth pony mare, her face covered with deep wrinkles, stood there. Her white mane was in a frizz, and she wore an elegant dark green dress.

“Oh!” Twilight said, stepping forward. “We’re sorry, we--”

“Y’all know this here is my family’s graveyard, don’tcha?” she demanded, ignoring Twilight’s apology. “Why, you shiftless lowlifes come around here, botherin’ me an’ my nephew, stealin’ our peaches an’ trespassin’ on our farm! Y’all oughta be ashamed o’ yaselves!”

“Ma’am, please!” Applejack said, stepping forward and taking off her hat. “We’re awful sorry, we didn’t mean to trespass. We just got a little turned around after we took a shortcut one of yer workers recommended.”

“Shortcut, ya say?” the old mare asked. “Well, you best tell me what y’all want, now, and then you can just be on ya way!”

“Well, ma’am,” Twilight said, coming up next to Applejack, “my name is Twilight Sparkle, and--”

“Twilight?” The old mare blinked a few times before she peered more closely at Twilight, glancing at the wings to her sides. “Oh my goodness, if isn’t Princess Twilight herself!” Her wrinkled face was drawn up in a beaming, jovial smile. “Well, I declare, that’s a pony of a different color!”

They all breathed a sigh of relief.

“I expect you’re here to see my dear nephew, Cobbler,” she said. “Well, he’ll be home for lunch soon, an’ I insist y’all join us. Follow this here path a ways and you’ll get to the house.”

“Well,” Twilight said, rubbing the back of her neck, “we don’t want to be a both--”

“We’d be honored!” Applejack said, cutting Twilight off. “That’s very kind of you, ma’am.” She leaned over to Twilight, quietly adding, “After all… ya never want to refuse a country pony’s hospitality.”

Twilight smiled and nodded, giving Applejack a subtle wink.

“Oh, now aren’t you just the sweetest thang!” the old mare said as she seized Applejack’s hoof and shook it. “The name’s Sarah Bellum, but most everyone here just calls me Auntie.”

“Well, Ms. Bell--” Applejack stopped when she saw the old mare lean closer, “--Auntie, my name’s Applejack, an’ besides Twilight, this here’s Rainbow Dash, Rarity, Fluttershy, an’ Pinkie Pie. Since you’ve invited us, I guess we’ll find our way to the house, then. But, um, aren’t you comin’ too?”

Auntie held up a bouquet of flowers. “I need to leave these here flowers on a few graves. I don’t mind y’all comin’ here to visit, but this here’s a private place an’ strangers are most definitely not allowed.”

Twilight smiled and bowed. “Of course. We understand. We’ll meet up with you later, then.”

The group walked off, following the path toward the house. Twilight looked over her shoulder and saw Auntie kneeling by the large gravestone with the stone filly on top. She was placing the whole bouquet on that grave alone.

***

They followed the path as directed, curving through the trees of the orchard until they made a turn and then…

“Whoa,” Rainbow Dash breathed.

“My words exactly,” Rarity said. “Whoa.”

Though far from the biggest house they’d ever seen, the “house” was more of a mansion. It was two stories tall with massive columns that supported a veranda that went all the way around the second floor. Broad double doors stood at the entrance, and on either side were two windows, on the ground floor and the top floor. The house itself stood at the end of a long lane of red bricks bordered on either side by towering oak trees, their branches reaching across to make a canopy that shaded the path.

They made their way to the entrance, where a pair of mares dressed in matching maid’s uniforms were standing.

“Hello?” said one as they came around. “Do y’all have an appointment?”

“Well, sort of,” Twilight said. “Auntie invited us for lunch.”

“Oh, then please come in!” said the other maid. “Please make yourselves at home! The cook said lunch will be ready quite soon, and we’ll be sure to set extra places at the dinner table!”

The maids both took a door each and opened them wide.

As they entered the main hall, they were again struck by the luxury of the home.

“My my my!” Rarity cooed, her eyes lighting up at the sights around her. “That chandelier! How exquisite! And the paneling in these walls! And this carpeting… the patterns are a fine example of neoclassical style!”

“Yeah, it’s pretty swanky all right,” Rainbow Dash agreed.

“Wha… buh… ‘swanky?!’” Rarity cried, gawking at her.

Twilight had to admit that she was almost as impressed as Rarity. It wasn’t anything like the architecture or decorating style of Canterlot, but there was still an air of regality about it. She peered into the rooms on the sides of the hall as they walked inside, and each room - the dining room, the parlor, the study (which was laden with tomes that sparked her curiosity), and even a small office - were all adorned with fine wallpaper, hoof-carved wooden furniture, original painted portraits, and shelves filled with decorative plates, alabaster statuettes, or silver candlesticks.

“You are too kind,” said one of the maids. “The Master has done his best to maintain this house with all the fineries that his family has acquired over the years. He is more of a simple pony, despite his success, but he insists on keeping it as it was in his childhood.”

“And by ‘Master,’” Twilight said, glancing over at the maid, “you mean Professor Cobbler, correct?”

“Yes, miss,” the maid said, bowing to her. “He is a very busy pony and often eats lunch at work, but today you are in luck… he will be arriving shortly to dine with us.”

“Good,” Twilight said as she gave her a friendly smile, even though inwardly she felt her pulse quicken.

“Please, feel free to take a look around the house,” the maid said. “The Master and his auntie would love for you to be comfortable, so please make yourselves at home. Can we get you anything while you wait for lunch?”

Rainbow Dash’s stomach growled. “Ugh… an appetizer, maybe?” She sniffed the air. “Oh, wow, whatever they’re cooking, it smells good!”

Applejack sniffed the air too. “Sure does,” she said. “Say, do ya think they need any help in the kitchen?”

“I don’t know, miss,” the maid replied, “but you needn’t trouble yourself.”

“Ain’t no trouble at all!” Applejack chuckled, and trotted off towards the kitchen.

Pinkie Pie, Fluttershy, and Rarity found the staircase and bounded up the stairs to the second floor. Twilight followed them and found herself in the upper hallway. Like the lower one, it went right down the middle of the house, with all the rooms off to either side.

“Ooh, I think this leads to the outside!” Pinkie exclaimed as she bounced toward a pair of double doors.

“I wonder what kind of animals live around this orchard,” Fluttershy wondered aloud, following her through the doors onto the veranda.

“My goodness, what a view!” Rarity exclaimed, walking out onto the veranda, placing her forehooves on the railing as she looked out.

Twilight smiled and was about to follow when she noticed that the walls here were adorned with family portraits. She glanced around and peered at each one.

Many were very old and even slightly faded or yellowed with age. The members of the family were sometimes alone, sometimes gathered in a room of the house, or outside the front, and all of them were elegantly dressed.

One in particular caught her eye: a young stallion in a tuxedo standing next to a beautiful mare in a billowing, flowing white wedding dress holding a bouquet of roses. On either side were other ponies in fancy dress. One mare standing next to the young stallion looked somehow familiar, and when she leaned closer, she realized that it was Auntie!

They all look so happy, she said to herself.

She continued up the hall, making her way to the veranda, but paused when she saw that one door, unlike all the others, was shut. The other doors were all open, showing still more elegant rooms, but not this one.

She paused, looking over her shoulder to see if anyone was around. When she was sure the coast was clear, she gently turned the knob.

It was locked.

She made a face. So far, they’ve acted like they’ve got nothing to hide. And maybe they don’t… but still…

She wasn’t normally the type to snoop, but something about this place felt off to her somehow. If they really were hiding secrets, and discovering those secrets would lead to Turing Test, then maybe, she decided, a breach in etiquette was justified.

She crouched slightly and peered through the keyhole. She couldn’t see much, but there was a bed. It was laden with blankets and a patchwork quilt and numerous white, cloudlike pillows, as well as a canopy lined with a lacy trim.

A bedroom? She frowned. That wasn’t much of a secret.

“What are you doing?”

Twilight jerked her head up and turned to see Auntie standing there, and her wrinkled face was creased even further as she glowered at her. The old mare was either far quieter than Twilight had expected, or she’d been too distracted by this locked door.

“I… I’m sorry,” Twilight said, lowering her head. “I was just curious about--”

“You are our guest,” Auntie said darkly, “and so you are welcome to make yourself comfortable. But if a door is locked, then you may assume that it is that way for a reason. I will thank you to respect our family’s privacy, young lady, Princess or not!”

Twilight bowed, her ears lying flat. “You’re right. I’m very sorry.”

“Hmph,” Auntie sniffed. Then she heaved a sigh, and her expression softened. “Well, I suppose I can forgive you. But I must ask you to come downstairs. I’d like you to meet my nephew. He’ll be along shortly.”

Twilight nodded. She followed Auntie downstairs, though she did give one last glance over her shoulder at the locked door, wondering about who its owner could be.

She went down into the main hall.

“Let me check to see how things are progressin’ in the kitchen,” Auntie said. “I’ve got a pie that I just know you’ll enjoy!”

Twilight nodded and watched as the old mare made her way to the kitchen. She heaved a sigh and glanced into the study. She was about to browse the bookshelves and take a book while she waited when she heard a sound coming from outside.

Hoofsteps. Somepony was approaching the front door, their hooves landing on the bricks. The doorknob turned, and the doors opened wide.

“Auntie Bellum?” the pony called before freezing in the doorway when he caught sight of her.

Twilight stared at the pony standing in the doorway, and he stared back at her.

The pony was a burnt orange earth pony stallion. He had large, yellow eyes with wrinkles at the sides. He was wearing a large, khaki-colored coat with many pockets and the sleeves rolled up. Around his neck was a pair of tinted goggles. He wore a top hat on his head and black rubber boots that went up to his knees.

He tipped his hat and smiled at Twilight.

“Well,” he said, his voice soft and slightly higher-pitched than Twilight would have expected, “welcome to my home.”

She blinked at him, noticing the slight drawl of his accent, and at last found her voice.

“Um… hello,” she replied. She put a hoof to her chest. “I’m Twilight Sparkle.”

“Yes, you are,” he said, chuckling as he hung his hat on a nearby hook on the wall. “I’ve been expecting you. Word travels fast in town, and I knew I wouldn’t have to wait long before you showed up at my door.”

Twilight swallowed, uncertain what to say to that.

“But I suppose that I am being rude,” he continued, keeping his calm smile. “Allow me to introduce myself. My name is Cobbler Mustang. I look forward to having you as my guest.”

To be continued…

Author's Notes:

References:

-Gadget builds on Pinkie's speculation of a giant robot by wondering if will be bionic, purple, and able to be piloted. This references Unit 01 in the seminal anime Neon Genesis Evangelion (at the request of editor GenerousGypsy [don't say I never did you no favors, man]).

-Auntie Bellum's name is a play on words: Her full name, "Sarah Bellum" is a pun on "Cerebellum," referencing her being part of a brainy family; her being called "Auntie Bellum," is a pun on "antebellum," a term which means things occurring before the Civil War, referencing her mannerisms and Mustangia in general mimicking things from the classical American South. Please note that this is meant affectionately.

-Gray Bell is a reference to Elisha Gray, the disputed "true" inventor of the telephone (and, interestingly, the father of the modern music synthesizer), and Alexander Graham Bell, the "official" inventor of the telephone, whose patent was filed the same day as Gray's.

-Ms. Peachbottom, in case you can't remember, is the pony mistaken for Miss Harshwhinny in "Games Ponies Play." She's not named in the show, but that is her official name. Here she is hitting on Twilight's brother:

-Pinkie mistakenly thinks Rainbow is referring to Twilight as the Element of "Surprise," which is both a stupid joke that I won't apologize for, but also a reference to Lauren Faust's original name for Pinkie Pie: "Surprise.".

-Cobbler's late father is named Fjord Mustang, a pretty blatant continuation of the family naming scheme dealing with either peaches or, in Fjord's case, the Ford Mustang line of cars.

-The Peach Mustang house is based on a real place: Oak Alley Plantation, a place in Louisiana that I had the good fortune to visit personally (pictured below):

One final quick note (because I'd bet someone might say something otherwise) is that Professor Cobbler wears a top hat because I think it's a good look for him and because top hats are cool. He's not an alter-ego for yours truly, I assure you.

See you next time as the full picture begins to take shape...

Jigsaw Falling Into Place, Part 2

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Twilight continued staring for a moment until she found her voice at last.

“It’s nice to meet you,” she managed to say. Gradually, she managed to smile, though she still didn’t know what to make of this strangely-dressed pony standing in the doorway of the old mansion.

“Likewise,” Professor Cobbler said. “Pardon me a moment, won’t you?”

He began pulling off his boots, placing them neatly to the side of the doorway, and hung his goggles and jacket on the hooks next to his hat.

One of the maids entered the hallway and smiled. “Oh, welcome home, sir!” she said, bowing to him slightly.

“Why, Lacey Loo, I didn’t realize you were back from your vacation!” he said, grinning broadly. “I trust it was restful. Did you and your coltfriend enjoy yourselves?”

She blushed. “Yes, Master Cobbler. But, um… he isn’t really my coltfriend any more.”

“Oh?” he said, frowning. Then, seeing the way she was barely holding in her giddiness, his eyes lit up. “Why, my dear Lacey Loo… did he finally pop the question?”

“Yes!” she cried, gleefully kicking her forelegs in the air. “Oh, Master Cobbler, I’m just so happy! We haven’t set a date for the wedding yet, but… well, we’d be honored if you would attend.”

He placed a hoof over his chest, closing his eyes solemnly. “Lacey Loo, it would be my pleasure.”

Twilight also smiled at the young mare. “Congratulations,” she said. “I’m sure it’ll be a beautiful wedding.”

“Oh yes, Your Highness, it surely will!” she exclaimed, practically shaking with delight.

“Now, I hate to change the subject,” Cobbler said, shutting the door behind him and stepping into the hall, “but will you and your companions be joining us for lunch, Twilight Sparkle?”

“We… yes, if that’s still all right,” Twilight replied.

“It most certainly is, and I am very glad to hear it,” he replied, giving a firm nod. He turned to the maid. “Lacey Loo, have places been set at the table for our guests?”

“Yes, sir!”

“Good. Very good.” He sniffed the air, smiling at the aroma. “I certainly hope it won’t take long. I am simply famished!”

As if in answer to his question, Applejack stuck her head out of the kitchen door. “Soup’s on, everypony!” she hollered. Then she caught sight of Cobbler standing next to Twilight and Lacey Loo.

“My my my,” he said, grinning at her. “Did you decide to help my cook in the kitchen?”

“Um… yeah,” she said, blinking at him.

“Well, aren’t you just the sweetest thing! Still, I hate to see a guest working in my home instead of relaxing. Why don’t you take a seat in the dining room with your friends while we bring out lunch. I guarantee that you will enjoy it most thoroughly!”

That said, he trotted right by her, going into the kitchen. As he passed, and without his jacket, Twilight noticed his cutie mark: a silver heart with a gear inside it.

Applejack walked over to Twilight. “Twilight?” she whispered. “Is that… him?”

“Yes, it sure seems so,” Twilight replied. “He… isn’t what I imagined.”

“He ain’t what I pictured either,” Applejack said, raising an eyebrow. Then she shrugged. “Well, Granny always said one o’ the best ways to get to know a pony was to sit down to supper with ‘em. I suppose lunch is just as good, though.”

Twilight nodded, letting out a sigh. “Good point. Let’s eat.”

***

The meal consisted of fried okra, a salad of greens with walnuts and dried peaches, baked macaroni and cheese, and a small cup of carrot soup. Auntie Bellum said that even though the maids had cooked the food, they were all her own recipes, and she had personally baked the peach pie that was coming for dessert.

They sat at a long rectangular table under a hanging chandelier. Despite the old-fashioned exterior, Twilight noted that the house was clearly electrified, as the chandelier was adorned with small, flame-shaped lightbulbs rather than with candles.

Cobbler sat at the head of the table, with Twilight on the opposite end, and the others were seated across from each other lengthwise. Their places were set with fine porcelain plates, silver cutlery, and crystalline glasses that held sweet, lemony iced tea.

“Well, dig in, everypony!” Cobbler said, smiling down the table at his guests.

They all looked at their lunches hungrily, but none of them touched a bite, at first.

“Is something wrong?” he asked, raising an eyebrow.

Rainbow Dash sniffed at the food. Her stomach rumbled and she made a face as hunger pangs stabbed at her. Just the same, she looked over to Cobbler uncertainly.

“Lan’ sakes!” Auntie Bellum said, cracking a smile. “Y’all act as though we’ve poisoned the food!”

The others all exchanged glances.

Auntie Bellum’s smile disappeared. “Well, I never!” she huffed. “To think that--”

“Now, now, Auntie,” Cobbler said, holding up a hoof. “I realize that you’re upset, but I suppose, given what I expect is the reason for their coming down here, I can’t quite blame them for being suspicious. Allow me to put your fears to rest.”

He picked up a fork, stabbed a piece of fried okra, and ate it. One by one, he took a bite or a sip of each thing on his plate.

“Heh heh,” Applejack said, breaking the uneasy silence. “Ya know, yer right, Professor. I even helped with some o’ this here food, an’ I sure didn’t see anypony put anything funny in it. Come on, y’all!”

She began her meal, and the others followed suit.

“Wow!” Pinkie said, stuffing a huge scoop of macaroni in her face. “This is yummy! It all is!”

“Pinkie, dear,” Rarity said, giving her a disapproving scowl, “please try to slow down. You don’t want to be rude in front of our host!”

Pinkie paused. “Ohh - mmph - showwy,” she managed to say through a mouthful of food before swallowing. “It’s just that the sooner we eat, the sooner we can have dessert! And that peach pie smells sooooo good!”

“I guarantee it’ll knock your socks off!” Auntie Bellum said, raising her head proudly. “Can’t nopony beat my peach desserts, no sir! I’ve won the ‘Best Pie’ award over ten times at the Mustangia County Fair!”

“I’d say she was bragging again,” Cobbler said, smiling at her, “but when it comes to her pie, her cobbler, crumble, or any other dessert, it’s no exaggeration.”

“Well, we’re looking forward to it,” Fluttershy said politely before taking a bite of her salad.

Cobbler looked around at all the ponies seated at the table and took a deep breath, letting it out slowly as a strange smile appeared on his face.

“Professor Cobbler?” Twilight asked, putting her spoon down as she watched him. “Is everything all right?”

“Hm?” he asked, blinking at her. “Oh, I…” He paused, chuckling. “I apologize, but it’s just… we have guests over with some frequency, but it still warms my heart to see a group of vivacious young ladies like yourselves in my home.”

“Oh!” Rarity exclaimed, covering her mouth with her hoof as she smiled. “That’s very kind of you to say, sir.”

“Yeah!” Rainbow Dash said. “We’re totally voracious!”

“He said we were ‘vivacious,’ Rainbow Dash!” Rarity groaned. “Not ‘voracious!’”

“Well, some of us are,” Twilight deadpanned, glancing over at Pinkie Pie, who was eagerly guzzling down her second cup of soup.

Pinkie looked around, aware that the others were staring at her. “What? Do I have something on my face?” She wiped her face with her foreleg and gasped with delight. “I did! And I bet it’s still tasty!” she cried as she began licking off the crumbs.

This was interrupted by the sound of Professor Cobbler and Auntie Bellum, who had both burst out laughing. Cobbler in particular was laughing so hard that he was holding his sides.

“Oh my goodness!” he managed to say through his laughter. “You young ladies are just hilarious!”

Twilight had to smile. She still wasn’t entirely certain what to make of this strange pony - in fact, she’d half-expected to meet a cold, reclusive mad scientist cackling loudly to himself in some dark laboratory - but her gut feeling about him was that, whatever else he might be, he seemed genuinely warm and friendly. That didn’t mean he wasn’t the pony they were looking for, of course, but she felt a little more at ease now that she wasn’t as suspicious of his demeanor being an elaborate ruse.

Professor Cobbler wiped his eyes and took a sip of iced tea, sighing with satisfaction. “Well,” he said, reclining in his seat as he steepled his hooves, “I suppose you’ve been quite patient, and I appreciate you accepting our hospitality. I’d hate to think that a Princess of Equestria and her companions were lacking in the social graces.

“But let us get to business. Specifically, why you have come to see me. And please, be direct.”

Everypony, even Pinkie Pie, froze in place.

“W-well, sir,” Twilight began, “we don’t want to come around here throwing accusations or anything!” She chuckled nervously, but swallowed when she saw Cobbler staring at her directly, his patient smile unwavering.

“All right.” She sighed. “Sir, since you asked for me to be direct, here it is: do you know anything about my robot friend, Turing Test?”

Cobbler nodded. “Indeed I do. The discovery of the automaton was national news, after all, and I certainly have an interest in all things mechanical. Let me guess… you believe I had something to do with the machine’s creation?”

Twilight bit her lip, then nodded.

“I thought as much,” Cobbler said, taking another sip of tea. His voice was still calm. “Shortly after its discovery, there was an investigation into me, my enterprises, and the community in general. Oh, they tried to keep it quiet, but it can be quite difficult to keep a secret in a place like Mustangia. Still, they found nothing and left.

“And shortly after an incident in Manehattan, apparently my name came up again.” A flash of annoyance crossed his face, and his eyes narrowed slightly. “This time, the Royal Guard came in full force.”

“Those no good hotheads!” Auntie Bellum growled, smacking the table as she scowled. “Why, they practically turned this place upside-down lookin’ for who-knows-what! Harassin’ my nephew, harassin’ the maids, even harassin’ me! You’d think young ponies like them would know better than to go around terrorizin’ an old lady!”

She started to cough and sat back in the chair, fanning herself. Cobbler placed his hoof on top of hers.

“There there, now, Auntie,” he said softly. Turning back to Twilight, he said, “As you can see, they were rather brusque with their inquiries. But, again, they found nothing. And now you are here. Am I to assume that you also suspect me of sending the other automaton that retrieved the first and also of being at the center of some conspiracy?”

Twilight swallowed. “I’m just trying to find my friend,” she replied. “And also the truth.”

“Hmm.” He nodded, pursing his lips. “All right, then… since you have such suspicions of me, then I trust you have evidence?”

“Some,” Twilight said. Her horn glowed, and she narrowed her eyes as she focused her magic. In the air, she formed the image of a strange glass bulb. “Turing Test uses a magic-electric converter bulb like this to charge her batteries via unicorn magic when she doesn’t have access to her generator. My friends and I checked, and we’re certain that this is something your company makes. Only your company.”

“Well, I must say, that is a wonderful facsimile,” Cobbler said, whistling appreciatively at the perfect image Twilight had formed, “but while we don’t get much call for them outside of our harvesters, we are still in the habit of selling them to interested parties. Just because my company made the bulb, it doesn’t mean we also made the machine using it, after all.”

“Yes, that’s true,” Twilight admitted. “But your family also has a history with building automata.”

“So do others, and nopony is known to have built one as advanced as the ones in question.”

Twilight became aware that her friends’ eyes were switching from side to side, as if watching a tennis match, as they watched Twilight and Cobbler speak in turn. She suppressed a grin.

“Mustangia has a difficult history with being part of Equestria,” she remarked, taking another bite of food.

“True, but if you’re talking about the Mustangian Independence Movement, they’re practically extinct. There are a few splinter cells here and there, but nopony takes them seriously anymore. You can ask the Royal Guard, the Night Guard, or any other credible source, and they’ll tell you the same thing. And I ought to know myself.”

“And why is that?” Twilight asked.

Cobbler chuckled. “Because my father was a member of the movement around the time it disbanded.”

They all stared at him at that.

“Oh, don’t look so surprised,” Cobbler said, waving a hoof dismissively. “Daddy was a bit hard-headed and got it stuck in his head that Mustangia would be better off on its own.”

Auntie Bellum snickered. “He surely was thick as a brick at times,” she muttered. “It was plain to see that we were better off as part of Equestria. Most folks ‘round these parts can see that. Eventually, he did too.”

They all exchanged looks before turning to Twilight, who was rubbing her chin thoughtfully.

“Well… I sort of got the impression that the ponies of Mustangia didn’t really care much for what the government thinks,” she said.

“I don’t suppose we do,” Cobbler said. “We like to do things our own way. Before the government came in, a pony with few bits to his name could always trade a bit of moonshine for what he needed, for instance, and now it’s a highly taxable, highly regulated product. I personally don’t much care for the hoops I have to jump through for my distilleries. But,” he added, heaving a sigh, “I suppose you can’t run an economy on such things. And goodness knows, nopony wants to go blind due to some back alley white lightning.”

“Well, I--”

“You know, that reminds me,” he said, perking up. “Would any of you care for a bit of our peach brandy? I’d be glad to offer y’all some.”

“I’ll have a taste,” Applejack said, grinning as she raised a hoof.

“Applejack, really, isn’t it a bit early in the day for that?” Rarity asked, wrinkling her nose at the prospect.

“I said a ‘taste,’” Applejack replied, rolling her eyes. “I wasn’t gonna drink the entire bottle.”

“Careful now,” Cobbler said, winking at her. “One taste and you just might.”

“Well, if that’s how it is,” Auntie Bellum said, perking up, “then somepony make me a mint julep!”

“Oh, Auntie, you are incorrigible!” Cobbler laughed.

Twilight frowned. “Excuse me,” she said, narrowing her eyes, “but I wasn’t talking about brandy or taxes or anything like that!”

Cobbler tilted his head at her. “Oh?”

“I mean the way technology is so prevalent around here,” she said. “The telephones and the automatic harvesters, for instance.”

“Well, welcome to the modern age,” Cobbler said, holding out his hoof. Then he frowned. “Why, I would have thought that a pony like you would welcome such things.”

“It’s not that… I mean, I do,” she stammered, shaking her head, “but it’s not about approving or disapproving!”

Cobbler only blinked at her, saying nothing.

Twilight sighed. “What I mean is that this is also part of the reason you’re under suspicion, Professor,” she said. “The conspirators are obviously in favor of rapid technological advancement, as you seem to be.”

“As any sane pony should be,” Cobbler remarked. Then his expression darkened, and his smile began to fade. “Mustangia has embraced the telephone, thanks in no small part to my own investment. Our harvesters have enabled us to achieve success the likes of which we never could have a few generations ago. My family has a proud history of constructing machines for the betterment of ponies’ lives. Technology is the future, my dear Princess Twilight, and that future is inevitable… despite what some ponies say.”

Twilight raised an eyebrow at that. “I think we both know who you mean,” she said. “You’re referring to Princess Celestia, aren’t you?”

Cobbler’s smile vanished entirely. Auntie Bellum’s pleasant expression was gone too, and she turned to scowl at her, as if she’d just said something incredibly vulgar. The room fell completely silent. Even Pinkie had stopped in mid-chew, her cheeks bulging with macaroni and cheese.

“Celestia,” he said slowly, an edge to his soft-spoken voice. “Yes, I suppose that you could say that we do not see eye to eye.”

“Literally,” Auntie Bellum quipped with a dry laugh.

“I know that much,” Twilight said, ignoring Auntie’s jab with only a flash of annoyance on her face.

“So, you’ve spoken to her about me, eh?” Cobbler asked. “Would you mind telling me what exactly Her Majesty said?”

Twilight lowered her head. “Not much. All she said was that something happened about a decade ago, that you had suffered because of it, and that you might be holding a grudge about it. But she wouldn’t say what happened. She said that I should get your side of the story.”

Cobbler raised his head. Twilight thought he looked genuinely surprised, at least for a moment.

“Well… how considerate of her,” he said. He sighed and sat back in his chair. “Well, she is correct that I am ‘holding a grudge,’ as you say. To be perfectly blunt… I despise that sanctimonious old nag.”

This got a gasp from them all.

“You take that back!” Rainbow Dash shouted, standing up and pounding her hooves on the table.

“Watch your mouth!” Auntie Bellum shouted back. “I won’t tolerate anypony yellin’ at my nephew!”

“Auntie,” Cobbler said softly.

“But nephew, she--”

“I know, but I must ask you,” he said, looking at her pleadingly, “to please drop the matter for the time being, if you please?”

The old mare smacked her lips together, as if she had the taste of something foul in her mouth.

“Oh, very well. But I do believe you should tell them what she’s done.”

“And I will,” he said. He turned to face Twilight again. “However, I really don’t feel up to telling you that story at this time, Princess Twilight. Forgive me, but it’s not an easy tale for me to tell.”

She watched as he shut his eyes, taking in a deep breath. “All right,” she said quietly, offering him a smile. “I can wait.”

“I’m glad to hear that. And rest assured, my animosity toward Celestia does not apply to you. You and your friends are perfectly welcome here. Even Miss Rainbow Dash.”

He turned to Rainbow Dash, who was still scowling at him.

“I apologize for my lack of discretionary language, young lady,” he said, bowing his head slightly, offering her a smile. “Of course I should have realized that you are all quite loyal to Celestia. I shall endeavor to be more respectful of that despite my personal distaste.”

Rainbow Dash didn’t look happy, but she sank back in her seat. “Fine,” she grumbled.

Cobbler then looked to Twilight, but found she was biting her lip.

“Something wrong, Princess?”

She opened her mouth to say something, then shut it, looking away, before finally speaking up again.

“Professor Cobbler, I don’t want to be rude, but you did say that I should just be direct,” she said. “I’m worried about my friend. I want her back, and I’ll do just about anything to rescue her. Please, just be straightforward and tell me… are you involved in this or not?”

But Cobbler just laughed and shook his head. “Now, Twilight Sparkle, if I were involved, I wouldn’t be very likely to tell you after all the trouble I’d have gone through, now would I?”

“No,” she replied quietly. “I guess not.”

“And if I say that I am not involved, even if that’s true, you won’t believe me until you’re convinced that I truly am innocent.” He raised an eyebrow. “Am I correct?”

Twilight hesitated, then nodded.

“I thought as much,” he said. “But, regardless, my answer is no: I am not involved.”

Twilight furrowed her brow. “I don’t know if I believe you, sir… but I want to believe you.”

“I’m very glad to hear that. Believe me when I say that I would like to be a friend to the Princess of Friendship and her companions. I’ll be glad to show you around my various enterprises. After that, I’m sure that you’ll see that I am not your enemy.”

“I hope so,” Twilight said, smiling weakly.

“Good.” Cobbler grinned. “Now, let’s have ourselves some pie!”

Auntie Bellum cleared her throat.

“Ah, yes,” he sighed, looking to the maid. “And don’t forget Auntie’s mint julep.”

***

Twilight was a little wary about getting a tour of Professor Cobbler’s home and businesses from the very pony they were investigating, but she told him plainly that she expected to be able to look at anything and talk to anypony she wished. To her surprise, he agreed, with the exception of the locked room upstairs. He wouldn’t say why, but insisted that it was nothing more than a bedroom that was plainly not connected to to any sort of secret passage or anything, and wouldn’t be much good for building advanced robots anyway.

Though her curiosity was still piqued, she took a look around the house and at the adjacent rooms and admitted that it was true, so she let it pass and, once the good professor had donned his work clothes again, agreed to let him take them to the first stop on their tour: the cannery.

They all took a coach pulled by Cobbler’s chauffeurs. Gradually the dirt road gave way to pavement as they travelled further away from Mustang City. According to Cobbler, he had several different facilities along the road, and the cannery was the first stop due to its close proximity to the orchard.

The building was a tall, blockish structure of red brick with tall windows that were open at the top to keep the place from getting too hot. When they arrived, the first thing they noticed was the row of harvesters parked outside. Workers were unloading the peaches onto a conveyor belt that led into the factory. They all smiled and waved to Cobbler and his guests.

Once inside, the noise of the place filled their ears, and they gawked at the sight. Towering machines and swift conveyor belts all rattled and hummed in a cacophony. The initial conveyor belt carried the peaches past a line of ponies in hairnets (and tailnets, they noticed). Earth ponies, unicorns, and pegasi alike all inspected the peaches as they came by, and any that looked bruised, rotten, or otherwise imperfect were tossed into a bucket nearby.

The remaining peaches were funneled into a tub of water to be rinsed, then onto a narrower path until they became a single line, which in turn led to an area where more workers fed them into a simple machine that sliced them down the middle, pit and all. More workers were waiting to remove the pits from each one before they were fed into a machine that steamed them, thus making the peels easier to remove, Cobbler explained. Then they went to the peeling station before being put into a huge machine that mixed them with heavy syrup and automatically dropped them into cans which were sealed, heated, labelled, and finally brought to the end of the line where they were crated.

“And that’s how we make our canned peaches!” Cobbler said, spreading his forelegs wide in a flourish.

The group of them all clapped their hooves appreciatively.

“It’s kind of like a field trip in school,” Twilight remarked, smiling at the memory.

“Yeah, field trips were always one of my favorite parts of school,” Rainbow Dash said. “That and gym class.”

“Well, thank you for the tour, Professor,” Twilight said, growing more serious, “but, if you don’t mind, we’d like to look around and ask some of the workers questions.”

“I am a pony of my word,” he replied. “You won’t find anything, of course, but take all the time you wish. I will be standing here until you are satisfied.”

The group spread out, looking all around the building, checking the offices and storerooms, and in every nook and cranny for something suspicious, but found nothing. The workers treated them warmly, like honored guests, and spoke highly of their employer. Not one gave the slightest hint of hiding something sinister.

Twilight and her friends trudged back to where Professor Cobbler was waiting for them. He smiled in spite of their frustrated looks.

“Satisfied?” he asked.

Twilight nodded. “Yes,” she sighed. “There’s nothing here.”

“Well then,” he said, getting to his hooves, “allow me to show you to the factory.”

***

The factory, it turned out, was not one building, but several as part of a massive compound, all constructed of the same red brick. A railroad track ran through the center. Each building housed different machinery and more assembly lines devoted to constructing machines both great and small.

One building was devoted to building and repairing the harvesters. Another was for constructing smaller parts of larger machines, including the magic-electric converter bulbs that had led them there in the first place. One small building built phonographs, speakers, and other sound equipment. Another built Mustangia-themed souvenirs to be sold in town.

None of them had anything to do with robots.

Nearly two hours had passed by the time they were finally done. Once again, they had come up empty-hooved: the workers said nothing of a conspiracy, the facilities were ill-equipped to build something as complex as Turing Test, and there was apparently nothing hidden. No secret passages, no documents under lock and key, or anything else. It was all open to them, and nothing looked out of place.

“Well this was a bust,” Rainbow Dash grumbled as she wandered back to the group standing outside the compound’s front gate.

“I thought for sure we’d find something here,” Fluttershy said to herself, furrowing her brow. Then she noticed Cobbler watching her and added, “Oh, um, I mean, if there was anything to find, that is…”

“It’s quite all right, my dear,” he said. “I want you to be assured of my innocence. So, are you satisfied once again?”

They all looked to each other, saying nothing, until Applejack raised a hoof.

“Yes, Miss Applejack?” Cobbler asked, calling on her like a filly in a schoolhouse.

“What I can’t figure,” Applejack began, “is why you got this whole place runnin’ like this. All these assembly lines, everypony doin’ the same thing over an’ over again… yer a farmer, so I thought you’d want it all done by hoof.”

“It is a bit impersonal,” Rarity said with a frown. “Why not have a team apply a bit of love to the whole process?”

Cobbler removed his hat and placed it over his chest. “I understand that concern,” he said, bowing his head, “but by doing it this way, we are able to can our peaches, build our devices, and get them to market with expedience and quality. I admit that when my daddy Fjord Mustang first started implementing the assembly lines and automating the process, a great many ponies felt that he was taking things too far. But while my granddaddy, Dearborn Crumble, was more of an innovator and inventor, Daddy was the one who really knew his business.

“Pay a few ponies a decent wage to do one part of the process, he said, and you could hire more laborers with less skill instead of only a few highly-trained ponies to do it all from start to finish. We hired more workers, not less, you see, and our businesses have made Mustangia a stronger economy and a good place to go for anypony who wants a fair job.”

Rarity smirked. “Forgive me, sir, but you sound a bit like a spokespony.”

Cobbler laughed. “I suppose it’s become second nature to me. Well, I apologize for the pitch. Now then, if there’s nothing else here, let us go to the next stop on our tour… and, in this case, I think you’ll find it a bit more traditional.”

***

The next stop was the distillery compound. Similar to the other compounds, there were more red brick buildings, but these were longer and had massive doors that were opened wide.

“Why are the doors opened like that?” Twilight asked.

“It keeps them more ventilated,” Cobbler replied as they approached. “You’ll see why we do that in a moment.”

As soon as they entered, they all understood: the inside of the building was sweltering like the hottest day of summer. On either side of the long building were gigantic copper pots. They were fat at the bottom but thinned out near the top, and they terminated in a long coil that extended out and dripped liquid into cylindrical vat nearby.

“My goodness… it’s so hot in here!” Rarity exclaimed, fanning herself.

“And humid, too!” Pinkie added. Then she froze, her eyes bulging. “Uh oh.”

“What is it Pink--”

Pinkie’s already poofy mane practically exploded in a virtual cloud of pink frizziness.

“Oh… oh dear,” Rarity said, gawking at her.

“My apologies,” Cobbler said, “but the heat is necessary. You see, my friends, we begin by fermenting the juice from the peaches to make a kind of sweet wine. Here, however, we distill it by heating it to a boil to separate out the alcoholic vapors, then condensing them into the final product which you see dripping into those vats over yonder. Once a batch is finished, we’ll pack it in a barrel, take it to the storeroom, and let it age for a few years.”

“And the stuff ain’t bad, either!” Applejack remarked.

“Well, you won’t find anything here either,” Cobbler said, shrugging his shoulders, “but, once again, feel free to look around if it’ll satisfy your curiosity. Just be careful… the stills are quite hot, and I wouldn’t want you to injure yourselves.”

Rainbow Dash cleared her throat and jerked her head at Twilight, beckoning her to join her out of earshot.

“Yes, Rainbow?” Twilight asked.

“You really think we’ll find something here?” she whispered, raising an eyebrow. “This guy might need to change his attitude about Princess Celestia, but so far we haven’t found a thing! And if we didn’t find something at the factory, what makes you think we’ll find something in a place like this?”

“You might be right,” Twilight replied. She frowned, her ears drooping. “Maybe we were wrong, or maybe Cobbler is just too good at hiding his tracks, but we can’t give up just because it’s a bother. Remember, we’re doing this for Turing Test.”

Rainbow Dash sighed, but then she smiled. “Right. Okay, for Tee.”

Twilight turned to the others. “We’ll continue searching. Professor, could you show us the brandy storerooms as well?”

“As you wish,” he said.

Pinkie raised her hoof. “Um, can I be excused this time?” she asked. By now, her muzzle was the only thing protruding from her puffball of a mane as it enveloped her head. “I can’t see a thing!”

“I’ll help her tame this beast,” Rarity said, taking Pinkie’s hoof to guide her outside. “Do let us know if you find anything, everypony.”

But after another hour of searching, they again found nothing. Each building housed only more stills and workers to tend them by monitoring the heat. The Master Distiller’s office held only a few documents, all centered exclusively around keeping track of the brandy and who it was being sold to. The dark, chilly storeroom was below ground, but there was nothing save for the towering shelves that held barrels of aging brandy.

No sign of Turing Test or the conspirators.

Twilight did find one object of interest, but it wasn’t what she was looking for. In one smaller building was a single pot still, taller than all the others.

“I see you’ve found Old Betsy,” Cobbler said as he came up behind Twilight.

“Oh!” she cried, startled out of her thoughts. She chuckled to herself and turned back to look at the massive still. “Yes, I couldn’t help but notice this one is by itself, much larger, and looks a little more… worn, somehow.”

“Yes, this still was from the original distillery,” he replied. “We still use it, mind you, but we mostly keep it around for old times’ sake. Plus it makes for an impressive sight on the tour.”

They both chuckled at that. Then Twilight’s energy drained from her.

“Something wrong, Princess Twilight?” Cobbler asked, tilting his head.

“I just… I really wish we’d found something by now,” she whispered. “I miss my friend, and I want to know that she’s okay.”

Cobbler blinked. “Forgive me,” he said, furrowing his brow, “but I did not expect this level of concern over a mere machine.”

Twilight frowned, shooting him a look. “Turing Test is no mere machine.”

Cobbler raised his hooves defensively. “I meant no disrespect,” he said, “but you’ll have to forgive my skepticism. You see, my granddaddy was a builder of automata, and so am I. While I do understand a sense of attachment and even assign a bit of a personality to my creations, I wouldn’t go so far as to call them my ‘friends.’ Not truly, I mean.”

Twilight turned and began to walk out of the building. “Like I said, Turing Test is no mere machine. She’s extraordinary. I didn’t assign her a personality… she has her own.”

Cobbler sighed. “If you say so, Princess,” he replied, walking alongside her. “Your other friends have finished their search. After this, there is just one more stop, and then I believe you will be satisfied that I am not the pony you are looking for.”

***

The coach stopped outside a building unlike the others. The steep, triangular roof loomed tall, as did the long, thin windows. A towering smokestack protruded from the left side of the building, though no smoke emanated from it. Steel double doors were at the entrance, and a sign showing Cobbler’s cutie mark was hung over them.

“Welcome to my little home away from home,” Cobbler said as he trotted up to the doors. He took out a key and unlocked them. “I think you’ll find this to be a real treat.”

They followed him inside, but at first the place was too dark to see. But then he pulled a large switch on the wall, and bright electric lights hung high overhead on the ceiling flashed on, abruptly illuminating the place.

Rarity rubbed her eyes in the sudden light. She slowly opened them, blinking until they adjusted. She turned.

A skeletal face with blank, soulless eyes was staring back at her.

She shrieked, stumbling backwards as the others rushed to her side.

“Stay back!” she shouted.

“Wait a minute,” Rainbow Dash said, as she saw the thing more clearly. “That’s… that’s…”

“A robot!” Fluttershy cried.

Indeed it was. Standing on a shelf, held up with a metal rod, were the half-finished remains of a mechanical pony.

“Well, the term is ‘automaton,’” Cobbler said, “but you are correct. That’s one of Granddaddy’s old models. I suppose it is a bit frightening, but I’ve gotten used to it, you see. In any case, though,” he said, grinning broadly, “welcome to my workshop!”

“Workshop?” Twilight asked. And then she took in the whole of the place, and her jaw dropped.

There were shelves upon shelves and rows upon rows, and they were all lined with different machines. Engines, tubes, wires, and batteries of all kinds were stacked neatly in groups, but she especially noticed that there were automata of all shapes and sizes propped up and on display.

“You made all these?” Twilight breathed.

“Oh my goodness, no!” Cobbler laughed. “A great many of these were built by Granddaddy. I kept a few that were unfit for the Manehattan Hall of Science exhibit, of course, and there are a few of Daddy’s old machines too, though he was never as fond of automata as I. But if you’ll follow me, I can show you some of my own creations. Just a few things I’ve, heh, cobbled together.”

They followed him. Twilight glanced to and fro with awe as they walked, and she took to the air to get a better look at the wondrous machines.

“Now here we have some of mine,” Cobbler said, puffing out his chest with pride. “I have a real appreciation for these machines. I believe one day they will lead us to a new era, but for now I am content to divert myself by constructing them as a hobby.”

It was obvious that these machines were much newer. They were in better condition, for one, and many were able to stand on their own, for another. Many were in the form of small mechanical toys, like teddy bears and tin soldiers with wind-up keys, but others were full-size machines in the shape of ponies. Some were half-finished things with bare machinery and wires, while others were finished and covered with shining metal exteriors. Some even wore clothes or had painted faces.

“I built a few of these for the Mustangia Fair attractions over the years,” he explained, pointing to one dressed as a clown. “The children do seem to love them… if they aren’t frightened by them, that is.”

“Hee hee!” Pinkie giggled. “This one is pretty funny-looking!” She pressed a button next to the clown automaton, and it started to move.

“Hello!” it said in a static-filled falsetto, its mouth moving stiffly up and down. “Is your refrigerator running?”

“Oh, oh, I know this joke!” Pinkie exclaimed. “I say ‘Yes,’ and you say--”

“Then you better go and catch it! Wa-ha! Wa-ha! Wa-ha! Wa-”

Applejack punched the button again, shutting it off in the middle of its unnatural, convulsive laughter.

“Yeah, that’s just about the creepiest robot I’ve ever seen,” she said, making a sour face.

“It, um… wasn’t that creepy,” Pinkie said weakly, her eyes not meeting theirs.

“Hmph,” Cobbler grumbled. “Everypony’s a critic.”

Twilight wasn’t paying attention. Several of the newest machines had some striking features: ears on hinges, for instance. Brass hooves for another. The rubber around their joints and the long slits in their lower faceplates. True, none of them had polymer manes or gemstone eyes, but still, she couldn’t deny that they all reminded her of…

“Turing,” she whispered.

“What’s that, Twilight?” Fluttershy asked.

Twilight turned, and Fluttershy saw that her eyes were damp.

“Oh… oh, Twilight,” she said, hugging her friend. “There there, it’ll be all right. We’ll find her! I know we will!”

The others joined her, holding each other and voicing similar support.

All the while, Cobbler just stood there, staring at them, his lips slightly parted and his head tilted.

“I still can’t believe you all have such feelings for a mechanical pony,” he muttered. Then he heaved a sigh. “Well, allow me to conclude the tour, then.”

They followed him as he took them to a section of the building where long wooden tables were strewn with tools and gadgets and blueprints.

“This whole building was a factory a long time ago, but I converted it for my own personal use. This area is where I do most of my work, though. Typically, I work alone, but occasionally I work with other enthusiasts. Despite the fact that automata have fallen out of favor, you’d be surprised to know that there are a great number of automaton builders. You can see some pictures of the different ponies I’ve worked with on the wall there.”

He pointed at the far wall where numerous plaques and photographs were hung next to pencil sketches of different automaton designs.

Twilight trotted over and examined them.

We’ve been at this all afternoon, she thought to herself, and even though some of these robots vaguely look like Turing Test, that’s not enough to connect Professor Cobbler to the conspirators. Maybe Gadget was wrong. Maybe the Royal Guard were right when they found nothing. This was just a waste of…

She paused, her thoughts interrupted as she noticed a small photograph among the others. Cobbler was standing next to several other ponies and the frame of another automaton. Cobbler was smiling proudly, as were his colleagues. But what caught her eye was the unicorn standing next to him.

He was blue, with a short black mane combed neatly over his head, and he wore a black shirt. She’d only met him one time, but she’d never forget his face.

“I knew it!” she screamed, whirling around.

“Princess?” he asked, raising an eyebrow. “What exactly do you me--waugh!”

She had seized him with her magic and dragged him across the stone floor. She pressed her muzzle into his, glaring at him with clenched teeth.

“You are one of the conspirators,” she hissed. “And now I have proof!”

“Princess, please, calm down!” he whimpered.

“Twilight, darling!” Rarity exclaimed, running to her side. “Please, try to control yourself! What is this all about?”

“I’ll show you!” she shouted, and levitated the picture over to them, practically shoving it in Cobbler’s face.

“I… I don’t understand,” Cobbler said. “This picture was from a year ago. My friends and I had just completed a new automaton. What does this--”

“The blue pony next to you,” Twilight said, pointing at him, “was spying on me. He tried to do something to Turing Test, and he deceived my friend Gadget, and then attacked her when she caught him! And now here he is in this picture! You know him! You work with him! You know Fine Print!”

He stared back at her, his eyes wide. “F-fine Print?” he asked. He looked at the picture again. “But… that pony’s name isn’t Fine Print. His name is Umahara!”

“Umahara?” Twilight asked.

“Uh, Twilight, ya might have more luck if you ease off a bit,” Applejack said. “You’ve already scared the Professor here half to death!”

Twilight sighed. “Fine.” She released her hold on him, and he let out a sigh of relief. “Now, please explain what you know about this pony.”

“Well, as I said, his name is Umahara,” Cobbler said. “I worked with his father a good many years ago, and now the two of us are friends. We build automata together on occasion, but other than that, we have no further relationship… unless…”

Twilight narrowed her eyes. “Unless?” she asked.

Cobbler’s eyes widened. “Shortly after that picture was taken, he asked me for a favor,” he said, his voice breathless. “He asked if I would mind giving him some of my old designs and…”

“And?”

“...and a warehouse where he could do some work of his own. As a friend, I was glad to let him lease the place, but if he’s been working with other ponies using my designs, then--”

“Then we have to find him!” Twilight exclaimed. “Where is that warehouse?”

“Not far from here,” he said, his face growing serious. “If you’ll permit me a moment, I have the floorplan of the building in the back storeroom.”

Twilight blinked at him. “Oh… oh my gosh, you really didn’t know, did you?” She swallowed. “Yes, Professor, we’d be glad to have your help, I… oh my gosh, I’m so sorry!”

Cobbler smiled. “Not to worry. Just give me a moment to find those plans. In the meantime, I suggest you signal the guards. You may need their assistance.”

“Good thinking,” Twilight said, breaking into a smile. “Pinkie, you know what to do!”

Pinkie reached into her mane, removing the signal flare. “Right!” she said. “Signal the Royal Guards… and then, after we rescue Rinny, have her come back and teach that clown robot some better jokes!”

***

The flare worked just as planned. Not long after Pinkie had sent the signal, Sea Hawk, Violet Wisp, and Orange Slice showed up at Cobbler’s workshop. They explained that they left Buttercup to guard Gadget and Spike just in case something went wrong.

Cobbler showed them where the place was on the map, and together they followed a dirt road through a forest until they were almost there.

“I suggest we hide in the woods,” Sea Hawk said to Twilight, “to conceal our approach. When we’ve confirmed that the conspirators are inside, we can rush them and overwhelm them before they know what’s happened.”

Twilight nodded. “That sounds like a good idea, Sergeant. My friends and I will back you up.”

Sea Hawk made a face. “Your Highness, I really don’t want to place you at risk…”

“Don’t worry about us,” Twilight said with a smirk. “We’ve dealt with worse than this.”

“Yeah!” Rainbow Dash added, stretching her wings. “We can’t let you have all the fun. Besides, we owe these guys for what they did to Tee!”

Rarity tapped her on the shoulder. “Do try to remember that we’re trying to capture them, Rainbow Dash,” she said, “not beat them to a pulp. I suspect the Royal Guards will have some questions for them, and we might want them in condition to answer.”

“Tch… fine,” she grumbled. “But if we run into any more killer robots, I say we blast ‘em with some rainbows before they can make a move.”

“After what 004 did to Turing, I’m inclined to agree,” Applejack said, pulling her hat down.

Orange Slice sighed. “Sounds like we’re mostly here to back them up,” he muttered.

“Aw, maybe you’ll get to tackle somepony, Orange Slice,” Violet Wisp said, elbowing him playfully.

He perked up at that. “Oh, you think?”

Sea Hawk shot them both a look. “Just do your duty, you two. We’ve got a job to do, so take it seriously!”

“Yes, sir!” they both said, saluting him stiffly.

They moved off the path and into the woods (ignoring Rarity’s complaints about tromping through the underbrush) until they were at the edge of the trees. The warehouse was a one-story building with a large, sliding wooden door and small windows near the roof. There didn’t appear to be anypony outside, and there was no sign of activity within.

“I have an idea,” Cobbler said. “Allow me to knock on the door and see if anypony’s there. They know me, and I own the building, so they won’t suspect a thing if I pay a visit.”

They all exchanged a glance.

“I can understand why you wouldn’t trust me,” he said, narrowing his eyes, “but unless you want to sit out here in the woods for who knows how long while they carry on their work, whatever it may be, then I suggest you all listen to me!”

Sea Hawk frowned. He then turned to Twilight. “Princess?”

Twilight hesitated a moment, then nodded. “All right,” she said quietly. “Good luck, Professor.”

Cobbler smiled, tipping his hat to her. He stepped out from the trees and walked over to the door. The distance from the trees to the warehouse was just under a hundred meters, so they could just barely hear him as he pounded on the door and called to whoever was inside.

At first, nothing happened, but then the huge door slid open slightly, and a pony trotted out.

Twilight gasped when she saw who it was. “Fine-- no, Umahara!”

The unicorn was there, this time wearing only his black shirt. For the first time, she could see his cutie mark: a screwdriver crossed over a wrench.

Umahara smiled and bumped hooves with Cobbler, and they seemed to be making small talk. After a few moments, Umahara turned away and gestured to something else in the distance. When his back was turned, Cobbler glanced back at the woods and nodded.

“Now’s our chance!” Sea Hawk hissed.

“All right!” Orange Slice exclaimed, even beating Rainbow Dash to the punch as he launched into the air, rocketing at Umahara. The others followed suit close behind.

Umahara turned when he saw the commotion. “What the--”

Orange Slice pounced on him, holding him down. Violet Wisp joined him, and they each helped hold him down.

“Professor!” Umahara shouted. “What’s the meaning of this?!”

Cobbler only shut his eyes and turned away.

“Umahara,” Sea Hawk said, standing over him, “you are under arrest for suspicion of conspiracy against Equestria!”

“Let me go!” he shouted as he struggled against the guards. Then he saw Twilight as she and her friends walked over to him.

“I guess we finally caught up to you, ‘Fine Print,’” she said, scowling at him.

“Princess Twilight!” he gasped.

Then she noticed as his eyes shifted over to the open door of the warehouse. She followed his gaze and peered through the open door. Though it was dark inside, the light shining through the door barely illuminated something at the end of the warehouse.

It was made of metal, about her size, and pony-shaped.

“Turing!” Twilight cried, and ran through the door, the others following her.

“Princess, wait!” Sea Hawk shouted as he ran after her.

Twilight ran toward the robot. Her heart was pounding in her chest at the sight of her missing friend as she called her name again. The robot’s ears perked up, and she began to turn her head.

Rarity was the first to notice that something was wrong. She called out, “No, wait!”

Twilight slowed only a moment in confusion, but then she too saw that there was something different about Turing. The robot looked slightly taller, and her legs were slightly more slender. Twilight tried to stop and skidded to a halt as the robot continued turning its head to face her.

“T-Turing?” Twilight whispered, her throat going dry.

It stared back at her with a singular, glowing yellow eye.

“Not quite,” it said, its feminine voice a dissonant, artificial rasp. “Hello, Princess. We welcome you.”

The robot’s eye glowed more intensely, and a motor engaged nearby the door. It slid shut, cutting off their exit. There was a hissing sound, and Twilight looked up to see that there were small pipes lining the ceiling like a sprinkler system in case of a fire.

Pale green gas was coming out of them.

“It’s a trap!” Twilight shouted.

Before the others could react, several wooden crates nearby burst open. Ponies in gas masks emerged and ran at them. One tackled Rarity, who screamed as he held her down. The others turned to face their attackers but began to cough as the gas rapidly filled the room.

Twilight began firing beams of magic at them, but her throat began to burn, and she was starting to feel lightheaded. She ran for the door, thinking that she could blast it open and vent the gas, but then a larger crate exploded outward and a new figure stood in her way. Her jaw dropped in horror when she saw who it was.

“Intruders detected. Now proceeding with detainment.”

She thought that 004 was going to attack her, but he turned his head and she saw that he had instead spotted Applejack, who was fending off the ponies in gas masks. She’d landed a vicious buck to the head of one when 004 simply leaped at her and easily pinned her to the ground with one hoof.

“No!” Twilight screamed as she began to cough. Then there was a hoof on her shoulder, and she whirled around, ready to defend herself.

“Princess!” Sea Hawk managed to gasp. “We’ve got to get out of here and get help!” He pointed up at the windows. “If we break them open, we can escape!”

The thinner robot’s eye glowed again, and metal shutters slid over the windows, making the room almost completely dark.

Twilight swore she heard something like giggling as the lone eye retreated into the darkness.

Her heart sank, but then she remembered that she had one last ace in the hole. She reached out blindly, grabbing onto Sea Hawk, and shouted, “Hang on, I’m going to get us out of here!”

Her horn glowed, and she and Sea Hawk vanished in a flash, teleporting back outside.

“Good thinking, Your Highness,” Sea Hawk managed to gasp. “Guards, we need to act fast! Get that door open, and…”

When he trailed off, Twilight looked over to see that both Orange Slice and Violet Wisp were just standing there, staring blankly into space and not trying to get the door open even though the screams of her friends from inside the warehouse were loud and clear.

“What’s wrong with you two?!” Sea Hawk shouted. “I said get that door open! That’s an order!”

“I’m sorry,” said a voice, and they turned to see Umahara standing there, no longer held down by the guards, “but they have new orders.”

“What did you do to them?!” Sea Hawk demanded, lowering his head as he prepared to charge.

“Sergeant Sea Hawk,” Umahara said, staring calmly into his eyes, “listen to me: it is as Celestia wills it.”

At the sound of that phrase, Sea Hawk froze, the tension draining from his body.

“Understood,” he said quietly.

Twilight whirled around and saw that his eyes were distant and glassy.

“Guards,” Umahara said, heaving a sigh. “Restrain Twilight Sparkle.”

In an instant, all three of them snapped to action and leapt on her, pinning her to the ground.

“You monsters!” Twilight screamed. “What did you do to them? What are you doing to my friends?!”

“Please stay calm,” Umahara said, walking over to them.

“Not a chance!” Twilight shouted. Her horn glowed as she prepared to teleport away.

Then a pair of hooves reached over to her, and she felt something snap onto her horn. Her magic died away in an instant. She saw a small metal band had been latched onto it.

A magical suppression device? How? Who--

She looked up and saw who had placed the thing on her horn.

Professor Cobbler was staring down at her, his expression sad.

“Professor?!” she exclaimed.

“I do apologize,” he said, “but it seems you’ve left me no other choice.”

Twilight grit her teeth, angry tears forming in her eyes. “How could you? We trusted you!”

“I know,” he said, adjusting his jacket, “and I did not enjoy lying to you, my dear, but I hope that soon you’ll see why this deceit was necessary.” He looked up at Umahara. “Good work, Mr. Umahara. Please see to it the others are taken care of.”

Umahara bowed to him. “Understood, Mr. President.”

“As for you, Princess,” Cobbler sighed, “I’m afraid you’ll be joining us for a bit longer than either of us expected.” He turned to the vacant-eyed guards, reaching into his jacket and pulling out a syringe. “Bind her wings and sedate her.”

As Sea Hawk took the syringe in his magic, Twilight renewed her struggles, fighting them off until she felt the sting of a needle in her neck.

To be continued…

Author's Notes:

Our antagonist finally reveals himself, and we meet 002 as well. But where is Turing Test in all this? Next time...

First, a little technical/historical stuff:

-The reference to Mustangian moonshiners conflicts with the government is based in history, particularly with regard to the Whiskey Rebellion in the United States in 1791 and the ongoing conflicts since then.

-The Mint Julep that Auntie Bellum requests is a lovely drink that's much beloved in the South (fitting with Mustangia's general theme), and is also the official drink of the Kentucky Derby, one of the most famous horse races in the world.

-The peach cannery and the distillery are both depicted as accurately as I could without getting in too deep. The use of copper stills is still fairly common for making brandy, though most brandy is made from grape wine, rather than peaches, of course. Here's an example:

-The implementation of the assembly line by Cobbler's father, Fjord, references Henry Ford's use of the modern assembly line to revolutionize manufacture of automobiles. While assembly line jobs get a bad rap, Ford's ideas at the time did a lot for the common worker: a good pay, an 8-hour work day, and a job that didn't need as much training, since you only needed to know one step in the process.

Okay, regular references! Not too many this time:

-The clown robot is based slightly on Tim Curry's performance as Pennywise the clown in the movie version of Stephen King's story IT.

-The title of this part of the arc is taken from the name of a Radiohead song. I'm a big fan of their music (Amnesiac and OK Computer are my favorites), and I chose this particular song because of both the name working with the theme of a puzzle coming together, and also because of the song's somewhat disturbing tone that crescendos and becomes more intense, much like the action of this part of the story, culminating in Twilight and her friends being captured. I wish I had something other than the music video (which I don't care for that much), but it's all that I could find with the whole song (which I do care for!).

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GoLJJRIWCLU

See you next time!

Welcome to the Machine, Part 1

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The world gradually came back to Twilight in waves. Her throat felt dry, and she coughed several times. She was vaguely aware of someone saying “Water,” but she wasn’t really in any condition to reply. Her vision was blurry, and her eyes still felt heavy. She rubbed them and began to sit up, coming back to consciousness by degrees.

She blinked a few more times and saw where she was. She was back in the small building at the distillery. The giant old still, Old Betsy, was still there. She looked to the side of it and saw Professor Cobbler standing next to it.

“You!” she shouted, trying to get to her hooves. However, her legs felt like they’d turned to jelly, and she nearly lost her balance. A few nearby ponies caught her and steadied her before she fell.

“Easy now,” Cobbler said, coming over to her, his face crossed with lines of worry. “Just give it another few moments, and then the effects of the serum should be gone.”

Twilight glanced at the two ponies, a stallion and a mare, who held her. They were wearing matching gray uniforms. She recognized them as the same uniforms worn by the ponies that had attacked her and her friends.

My friends! She jerked her head upright at the thought.

She tried to use her magic, but nothing happened, and she remembered the device on her horn. She tried to flare her wings, but then she felt something holding them down and turned to see that they’d been bound tightly with cords.

“What did you do to my friends?!” she demanded. She tried to lunge at Cobbler, but the two ponies held her back.

“I assure you, I’ve done nothing at all to them. I have no intention of harming them, or you,” he said, placing his hoof on his chest. “In truth, Twilight, I would have been fairly content to let you and your friends go on your merry way, but once you discovered my association with Mr. Umahara, well, I decided it was time for a change of plans.”

Twilight glowered at him. “When you went to get the floor plans of the warehouse… you managed to send a message warning him that we were coming.”

“I’d had him there as a backup plan, yes,” he said. “I had a telephone installed in the back room. Remarkably useful device, isn’t it? A quick call telling him to be ready was all it took.”

“So, you’re involved with all this,” Twilight growled, clenching her teeth. “The conspiracy, the spying, and sending Turing Test to find me!”

“Indeed I am,” he replied. He smiled. “I’m actually quite proud of 003 and the others. I look forward to telling you more, but perhaps it’s best if I show rather than tell.”

He went to the wall by the still. He pulled back a brick, revealing a switch. He pulled it, and the flame under the still went out. He then went to the hatch on the still. He turned the handle on it, and the hiss of hydraulics was heard. To Twilight’s amazement, the side of the still actually slid open, revealing the hollow interior.

“Please, follow me,” he said as the two guards led her inside the still. He pulled another switch, and the copper side of the still slid back into place, enclosing them. A lamp came on overhead. There was a rumble, and she gasped as the floor suddenly began to drop. The platform descended into a concrete shaft.

“An elevator!” Twilight exclaimed.

“Yes. I keep my secrets well-hidden, Twilight, but I believe it’s time I shared them with you. Yes,” he said, chuckling to himself as the elevator descended further and further below the earth, “I do believe it’s time I show you what we’ve built beneath everypony’s hooves.”

The elevator softly rumbled as it moved down the shaft, a breeze gusting up lightly as they went, and Twilight noticed the tops of four sets of caterpillar treads pressed against the walls under the platform. It was getting harder to see, but then dim lights on the rim of the platform flicked on; Twilight stiffened and glanced upward to see the light at the top of the elevator shaft already looking tiny and distant above them. Red steel beams to reinforce the shaft ran alongside them. Markers went by her: thirty meters deep… fifty… a hundred…

A brass plaque was on the wall, easily read as they descended past it:

PROGRESS

Twilight glanced over at Cobbler, who was smirking. A few moments later, another one went by:

INNOVATION

“What did those signs mean?” Twilight asked.

“I’m fairly certain they’re in your vocabulary, Twilight,” Cobbler said, chuckling. The two guards joined him.

Further along, another plaque was seen:

FREEDOM

“Enough! Where are you taking me?!” she demanded, panic rising up in her voice.

Cobbler’s expression softened, and he smiled at her. “Don’t worry, Twilight Sparkle. I’m taking you to a wonderful place. We’ve kept it hidden for a long time, but, as any good earth pony will tell you,” here he tipped his hat, wiggling his eyebrows, “sometimes you have to plant something very deep if you want it to grow.”

Twilight stared back at him. She swallowed. “And what exactly are you growing here?”

“As I said,” he replied, “why tell you… when I can show.”

Bright light showed from below the platform, and then the elevator slowed as the concrete suddenly gave way to glass in the front, the panes held in reinforced steel. Twilight whirled around to look.

Her mouth dropped open.

“Oh.”

Before her was a vast chamber carved into the rock of the earth. The very size of it brought to her mind a new definition of the word “cavernous”. They were still over a hundred meters from the floor, but she could look out and see that the room extended back perhaps a kilometer, or even more, and was about half as wide. The ceiling blazed with hanging lamps, bathing the cavern in synthetic sunlight. More than halfway down the walls but still high above the ground, a network of catwalks crisscrossed the void, going into and out of rounded tunnels carved into the gray stone walls. Pegasi were flying between them, but among them were also several strange machines with whirling propellers.

On the floor below she could see numerous distinct areas. Great machines with scores of flashing lights stood in great rows. Further away she could make out a marketplace filled with kiosks and vendors standing outside. There were statues, fountains, and raised platforms with dining areas. And in the distance beyond them, she could spy the entrance to…

“What is that?” she whispered. “Is that… an amphitheater?!”

“It certainly is,” Cobbler replied. “We have rallies and plays there, and occasionally even a movie.”

“I like the automata matches,” one of the guards remarked. “Inventors build little remote-control machines and fight them against each other.”

“I find them rather crude entertainment, myself,” Cobbler said, clicking his tongue. Then he sighed, adding, “The younger among us like them, though.”

Twilight was still in awe. “There must be hundreds of ponies here,” she whispered.

“I believe at our last count we were at 987,” Cobbler said, puffing out his chest. “A shame, though… I really had hoped we could reach a thousand before… well…”

“Before what?” Twilight asked.

“You’ll see,” Cobbler said, winking at her.

Twilight bit her lip at that answer as she at last looked directly below. Strange devices, large and small, were displayed on either side of a broad pathway of stone tiles. There were dozens of ponies gathered among them, many of them already pointing excitedly at the elevator.

At her, she realized. A few pegasi even flew up and took some pictures before flying off when Cobbler shooed them away.

“How… I mean… what is this place?” Twilight breathed.

“This is the seedling nation that will become the future,” Cobbler replied. “This is the nascent future that soon will give unto all of ponykind a better world than the one its old masters could promise. This is what we’ve hidden from the prying eyes of those on the surface, but it is nearly ready to burst forth and spread to every corner of Equestria, and, in supplanting it, it will become Equestria.”

The elevator reached the bottom. Gleaming, polished brass doors slid open, and Cobbler practically galloped outside with the giddy excitement of a young colt. He stood before the gathered crowd and spread his forelegs wide as he stood.

“Twilight Sparkle!” he bellowed. “At long last, we welcome you to… TechQuestria!”

The crowd erupted into thunderous cheers and applause.

Twilight blinked. “To… what?!”

Cobbler coughed, his reserved demeanor returning. “Yes, well,” he said, blushing slightly, “I admit I didn’t care for the name, but it won the vote, and now it’s grown on me.”

“No, no, it’s not the name,” Twilight said, shaking her head. “I mean… what exactly is this place? What is the purpose of all this?”

“Oh, now, I would have thought that was obvious, Twilight,” Cobbler said. “Given what you and your cohorts have already uncovered about our little, ah… ‘club.’”

The crowd laughed at that.

Twilight took a deep breath. “Let me see… you’re opposed to Celestia’s--”

The crowd began booing loudly at Celestia’s name. Cobbler waved his hoof, quieting them down.

“--to her cautious stance on technology. And since I’m guessing you’re also responsible for moving the sun and moon without the Princesses’ permission, you’re also opposed to their rule in general.”

“You are correct on all counts so far,” Cobbler said.

The crowd gave another round of applause.

Twilight raised an eyebrow at this. This really isn’t what I expected the conspirators to be like, she thought to herself.

“So… what, you’re planning to conquer Equestria?”

“‘Conquer?’!” one of the ponies in the crowd shouted before bursting into laughter. Others began to join him.

Cobbler chuckled as he went over and put his hoof on Twilight’s shoulder. “Oh, my dear Twilight, you must think us nothing more than a gaggle of mad scientists,” he said, shaking his head, “but nothing could be further from the truth! We only want to help Equestria! We don’t wish to ‘conquer’ this country, we wish to liberate it from the Princesses who hold it down under their hooves!”

Twilight narrowed her eyes at him.

“Do you not believe me?” he asked, frowning.

“You all know that I’m a Princess, right?” She put her ears back, eyeing the crowd distrustfully. “Is this some kind of cruel joke? Are you all acting like I’m an honored guest to humiliate me? Is that it?!”

She shouted those last words, her anger rising.

“No, we love you, Princess Twilight!” a mare in the crowd shouted.

“We’d never do that!” said a stallion next to her.

“You’re the hero of Equestria, Twilight Sparkle!”

The crowd began loudly cheering for her. Gradually, it dawned on Twilight that this wasn’t some elaborate joke. She’d felt like she was on display, like Cobbler was gloating or parading her in front of his followers… but now it seemed that these ponies genuinely admired her.

“Then… if you feel that way… why did you kidnap me?!”

The crowd went silent. They all began looking to each other.

“Um, Mr. President?” one of the ponies, a unicorn stallion, asked, raising his hoof as he stepped forward. “She has a point. Do we really have to keep her restrained like that? Maybe we could take off her magic suppressor, or at least unbind her wings?”

Others began to agree, but Cobbler removed his hat and raised his chin, saying, “My friends, I understand what you mean, and though I have apologized to her, I doubt Twilight Sparkle is ready to trust us. However, I am sure that once she gets to know us a little better, she’ll be more inclined to become a citizen of our beloved nation.”

He looked to Twilight hopefully.

She raised an eyebrow at him.

“Well, perhaps you just need to see what we have to offer,” he said, replacing his hat and giving her a small smile. “Twilight, these ponies represent different Departments here in TechQuestria. They have brought some of their most promising inventions out to display solely for your benefit. They want to show you what we can offer to ponies everywhere. You’re a bit of a scientist yourself, are you not?”

“I… yes, I suppose I am,” Twilight said. She glanced around. She had to admit that her curiosity about the devices around her was growing. These were the ponies who had built Turing Test and her siblings. Learning more about them and what they were capable of could be beneficial, she decided, and indulging them might get her more answers than resisting them every step of the way.

“All right,” she said, coming up alongside Cobbler, “I’ll take a look. After all, it’s been a while since I’ve been to a science fair.”

The ponies excitedly dispersed, going to their stations to ready their inventions for Twilight’s perusal.

I just have to hope, Twilight thought to herself as she watched them scurry, that Spike and Gadget can get help before things get worse.

***

Spike groaned, flopping onto his back on the bed in the small quarters in the Royal Guard outpost.

“Ugh, they’ve been gone a while!” he grumbled.

“Mm hmm,” Gadget muttered as she continued leaning over the nearby work desk.

“Do you think everything’s all right?” he asked, sitting up as worry lines crossed his face.

“Mm hmm,” Gadget replied.

Spike cleared his throat. “Gadget!” he said.

Gadget jerked her head up and then turned around to look at him. He saw she had some tools in her mechanical hands and was adjusting something on the desk.

“I’m just saying, the sun’s starting to set, and we still haven’t heard back from the other guards!”

Gadget looked out the window. Sure enough, the land all around them was already painted by a yellowish orange color as the sun sank closer to the horizon.

“I guess,” she said, and turned back to her work.

Spike hopped off the bed. “Hey, come on, Gadget, aren’t you even a bit worried? When we saw that flare go up, I thought maybe they’d found something, and when all the guards left except for Buttercup, I thought maybe they’d be coming home with Turing Test soon! How can you--”

“I know!” she cried, pounding a hoof on the desk. “Look, I know, Spike, but there’s nothing I can do right now except wait! Until they need my help, I just want to work on something else to keep myself occupied, okay?!”

Spike cringed, looking away. “Yeah… yeah, okay. I’m sorry,” he said softly as he turned away.

Gadget sighed and set her tools down. “No, Spike, I… it’s me who should be sorry,” she said, putting a hoof on his shoulder. “I shouldn’t be ignoring you while we wait. I’m sure this isn’t easy for you either.”

“No,” he said, but then gave a small smile. “Then again, with all the stuff Twilight does when she and the others go off, I’m almost used to it. Heh heh.”

“Well, I’m not,” Gadget sighed. Then she used one of her mechanical hands to ruffle the scales on his head playfully, giggling as he squirmed. “Still, waiting is part of the gig, isn’t it? We assistants have to stick together, don’t we?”

“I guess so,” he replied, squirming, though he chuckled as he pushed her mechanical hand away. “So, um… what are you working on?”

“Hm? Oh!” She brightened and took hold of the device. “It’s a listening device!” she exclaimed and held it before him.

It was a flat, rectangular object with a conical dish on one end and a wire leading to small bud-shaped nub.

“So… how does it work?” he asked.

“Oh, well… hang on…” She set it down on the desk, taking off the front panel and adjusting some of the small machinery inside. She nodded to herself, replaced the panel, screwed it tightly back into place, and held the device out to Spike.

“Put the bud in your ear,” she said, “and then point the dish at whatever you want to. You should be able to hear a pony whispering fifty meters away!”

“Neat! Too bad I don’t have ears,” he said.

They both chuckled at that. Still, he took hold of the device, flipping a little switch on the side to turn it on. He put the bud near where his ear would be, and walked to the window, pointing the dish outside at the trees surrounding the outpost.

“Whoa! I can hear birds! And squirrels!” His eyes lit up, and he looked over at Gadget, a broad grin on his face. “This is awesome!”

“O-oh, no,” she said, blushing slightly. “I just always bring little parts with me when I go traveling so I have something to do if I get bored or anxious.” She opened her jacket, displaying all the small pockets stuffed with gears, wiring, and bits of electronics.

“Cool!” Spike said. He turned back to the woods, scanning with the listening device. Then his eyes bulged. “Hey, I think I hear some ponies talking out there!”

“Spike, you shouldn’t be listening in on somepony’s private conversation!” she cried, covering her mouth in shock.

“Huh? N-no, it’s not like that!” he exclaimed, shoving it back into her hooves.

“Good,” she said, and placed the bud in her ear before going to the window. “Now let’s see what they’re talking about.”

“What the--?! You said I shouldn’t be listening in on somepony’s conversation!” he exclaimed, stamping his foot indignantly.

“Yeah, and I shouldn’t either,” she said, turning and sticking her tongue out at him. “But I’m still gonna.”

“No fair,” he grumbled, crossing his arms.

Gadget scanned the area slowly. Like Spike had said, there was the sound of wildlife and the rustle of the breeze through the trees, but then…

(“--ing you … really gonna … soon?”)

(“Ju-- --ax, the ... --ident is going …”)

(“Well, yeah, but … even with --ight Sparkle?”)

Gadget froze. Did they just say ‘Twilight Sparkle’?

“Uh, Gadget?” Spike asked. “Everything okay?”

“Spike,” Gadget whispered, narrowing her eyes. “Stay here.”

“Huh? What do you mean? Is everything okay?”

“I’m… not sure yet,” she said. “I can’t quite make out what those ponies are saying, so I’m going to try to get closer. Just stay put.”

Without another word, she slipped out the window. They were on the second floor, but she reached down with her two front mechanical arms while the back two held the windowsill. She released her grip and set down easily. Keeping her head low, she made for the woods.

From his vantage point, Spike watched her, his anxiety growing, until he heard a loud ringing downstairs.

Startled, he rushed out of the room and down the stairs. He saw Buttercup holding one of those telephone devices at the front desk.

“Buttercup?” he asked.

“Oh, hey, Spike!” Buttercup said, smiling jovially. “Sorry, I have to take this call. It might be important! Maybe it’s even from Sergeant Sea Hawk!”

“I didn’t know you guys had a telephone,” Spike said, raising an eyebrow.

“Well, they’re just so darn useful!” Buttercup said. “Hang on.” He picked up the earpiece. “Mustangian Royal Guard here! This is PFC Buttercup speaking!”

(“It is as Celestia wills it.”)

Buttercup’s expression changed. His stature was more relaxed, and his gaze unfocused.

“Uh, Buttercup?” Spike asked.

(“Smile and tell him everything’s okay.”)

“Everything’s okay,” Buttercup said, giving him a smile.

“You sure?” Spike asked.

Buttercup nodded. He continued listening to the phone for a few moments more before hanging up.

“Who was it?” Spike asked.

“Just someone asking if I could come look at something really quick. I need to step out a second,” he said. “Please wait here, okay?”

Spike furrowed his brow. “If you say so,” he said, and turned to go upstairs. Man, he thought to himself, I hope he’s not doing that thing where he just got bad news and he’s afraid to tell me. I’m mature enough to take it!

As soon as he was gone, Buttercup slipped outside and made his way up the path through the woods.

Meanwhile, Gadget was creeping through the trees, getting closer to the conversation to try and hear better. She finally spotted a pair of ponies, an earth pony stallion and mare in matching gray uniforms.

Who the heck are they? she wondered. She raised the listening device. They were only a short distance away now, so they should be easier to hear.

“--aking so long?” the stallion asked.

“Your watch is probably fast,” the mare replied. “Just hold on.”

They continued standing there, the stallion looking around anxiously. Gadget could barely see them through the trees and bushes, but she crouched lower, fairly certain that she wouldn’t be spotted.

Thus far, she wasn’t at all sure they were up to anything, but there was something about their posture and their strange matching clothing. Her instincts told her there was something amiss.

Their heads rose, and they both looked up the road. Gadget also turned her head. Someone was coming their way. She watched, holding her breath until they came into view.

It was Buttercup.

“You’ve been activated?” the mare asked.

Buttercup nodded stiffly.

“Then here,” the stallion said, placing a small pouch in Buttercup’s hoof. “Complete your orders, then stand by. Don’t let them leave.”

Gadget’s throat went dry as she watched Buttercup nod and wordlessly go back up the road toward the outpost.

‘Don’t let them leave?’ Do they mean us? Oh no, Spike!

She started to stealthily make her way back without being heard, but she heard the stallion speak again.

“That ought to do it,” the stallion said, letting out a relaxed sigh. “No way they’ll get a message out now.”

“I bet the telegraph office is already getting an earful,” the mare chuckled. “Radio the other guards to come here and pick those two up.”

The stallion nodded and reached into his pocket, pulling out a small radio earpiece. He placed it in his ear. “Guards, you are to return to the outpost and apprehend the fugitives. It is as Celestia wills it.”

Gadget’s blood went cold. There was no time to waste, so she bolted through the woods. Over her shoulder, she thought she might have heard the mare call out to her, followed by the stallion yelling frantically into the radio “We’ve been spotted! Move in, move in, move in!”

Her cover was blown now, that was certain, but all that mattered was getting to Spike before Buttercup did whatever he was going to do.

She ran at the outpost and used her mechanical limbs to vault herself up at the open window. She pulled herself up and balanced herself on the sill.

“Spike!” she cried, and then she froze.

Spike was sitting on the bed, sipping from a cup of tea.

Buttercup was standing in the doorway, holding a serving tray, watching him drink with a somewhat vacant look.

“Oh, hey, you’re back!” Spike said, wiping his mouth. “Find anything?”

Gadget looked from Buttercup to the tea in Spike’s claw, her eyes bulging.

“The tea!”

“Huh? Well, you might not want it. I mean, thanks and all, Buttercup, but it actually tastes a little bitter and--”

Gadget slapped the teacup out of Spike’s claws. Ignoring his cries of protest, Gadget got close and saw that there were tiny flecks of blue in the dark brown liquid. She looked up at Buttercup, whose expression was turning serious. Before he could react further, however, a mechanical hand shot out and reached into the chestplate on his armor. She snatched out the tiny pouch he’d been concealing. It came loose and dumped blue powder all over the floor.

“Oopsie,” Buttercup said slowly. His expression darkened. “You shouldn’t have done that, Miss Gadget.”

Spike wasn’t always one to read the room, but even in this case he could tell something was amiss. He slowly backed away from Buttercup.

“Gadget? What’s wrong with Buttercup?” he whispered.

“I don’t know,” she whispered back. “But I think the conspirators got to him… they’re controlling him somehow!”

“No, no, guys,” he said, giving them a lopsided grin. “I’m a loyal soldier to Celestia… this is all her will…”

Spike made a face. “Yeahhh, not buying that.”

“Spike, we’ve got to get out of here. Now.”

Buttercup looked stern. “You have to stay here.” He took a step forward. “I can’t let you leave.”

“Spike, the window!” Gadget cried, but then Buttercup sprang forward, belying his prodigious size, and wrapped his forelegs around Gadget, catching her in a bear hug and lifting her off the ground.

“Gadget!” Spike shouted.

Gadget struggled and kicked, but Buttercup was unbelievably strong. She’d assumed that the guard’s girth had been mostly fat, but it seemed that she’d been wrong: it was almost all muscle. He was squeezing her so hard she couldn’t breathe.

Luckily for her, he only managed to bind her regular limbs. Her mechanical limbs reached over to the wooden chair sitting by the desk, seizing it and smashing it over Buttercup’s back. This wasn’t enough to make him let go completely, but it did stun him enough to let her yank his legs out from under him with her anterior arms. Once he lost his balance and tumbled forward, Gadget regained her footing and managed to seize the large earth pony with all four hands. She lifted him up, with him struggling all the while, and looked to the window.

“Sorry about this, Mr. Buttercup,” she whispered, and heaved him with all her might, tossing him through the window, smashing the glass and a good portion of the wall too as he tumbled out and landed roughly on the ground below.

She and Spike looked out and saw the mare and stallion from before gawking at the sight of the guard lying in a daze on the ground. Then they looked up at her and began to back away, their eyes bulging in fear.

Just then, she heard the flapping of wings and looked up. Swooping in from over the trees, a pair of pegasi arrived and landed next to Buttercup.

“Violet Wisp and Orange Slice!” Gadget cried. “Don’t tell me they’ve gotten to you too!”

The pair only blinked up at her. Then Violet Wisp glanced back down at Buttercup, shaking him gently.

“Rise and shine,” she said as he sat up slowly, groaning, “because it’s go time, Buttercup!”

A moment later, Sea Hawk emerged from the woods. Like the others, his eyes were strange and distant. But he still carried his usual stern demeanor.

“Your orders, Sarge?” Violet Wisp asked.

Sea Hawk locked eyes with Gadget. “Storm the building,” he said calmly.

Gadget gulped and looked over at Spike. She snatched him up and retreated back into the outpost, then dashed down the hall and into one of the other rooms.

“We don’t have a lot of time,” she whispered to the little dragon. “The conspirators have our friends. We need to get help, Spike.” She reached into her jacket and removed a pad of paper. She also took out a pencil and wrote an urgent note on it. Through the floorboards, she could hear the sound of other ponies entering the outpost on the ground floor. They were coming.

“Here,” Gadget said, shoving it into his claws. “This is a note for Princess Celestia, telling her we need backup and that the Royal Guards here in Mustangia have been compromised. Can you send it?”

Spike grinned, giving her a thumbs up. “No problem!”

He rolled up the note and took a deep breath. He breathed fire on it, waiting for the note to disappear in a puff of magical green flame.

The note simply caught fire, the edges turning black and curling. Spike dropped it, and Gadget began to stomp on it to put out the flames. Spike waved away the smoke from it as it smoldered.

“What the… is that supposed to happen?!” Gadget hissed.

“No, of course not!” he cried. “I don’t get it… the note should have gone directly to Celestia! Why didn’t it…”

Then they both locked eyes.

“The tea,” they said in unison.

“It must have done something to my dragonfire magic,” Spike whispered. “I… I can’t send a letter to the Princesses! To anyone!”

They froze up as they heard the sound of somepony knocking on doors down the hallway.

“Gadget… Spike?” Violet Wisp called. “Why don’t you come on out?”

There was a clattering sound - Gadget guessed it to be the sound of somepony kicking in a door - and then an annoyed grunt. She recognized the grunt as Orange Slice’s.

“We don’t want to hurt you,” Violet Wisp said calmly, knocking on another door.

“Unless you’re hiding in my room!” Orange Slice growled.

Gadget looked around. The simple room had athletic posters as well as pictures of mares in sexy poses. On the desk were pictures of Orange Slice with various girls… as well as one with his mother and sisters. He appeared much younger and was wearing braces and had freckles.

Gadget might have chuckled if she hadn’t been so scared.

There was a knock at the door.

“Come on out, you two,” Violet Wisp said. “I can smell the smoke. You tried to send a letter didn’t you?”

“The heck with this!” Orange Slice snarled. “Get out of my room!”

He kicked in the door and the pair rushed in.

The room was empty.

“What the…?” Orange Slice asked, tilting his head. “Where’d they go?”

“Under the bed!” Violet Wisp cried, diving forward and lifting up the bed.

“N-no, wait, I--”

“Oh, gross!” Violet Wisp said, gagging, setting the bed back down roughly. “Those were definitely not our fugitives.”

“Then… the window?”

Violet Wisp shook her head. “Sarge, Buttercup, and the two others are watching the exterior.” She tapped a radio earpiece she wore. “They’d have alerted us if they tried to sneak out.”

“Then where…”

Then it dawned on them, and they both finally looked up.

Gadget was using her mechanical hands to cling to the ceiling, holding Spike in her forelegs.

“Hi!” they both said in unison, and dropped down. Gadget landed squarely on Orange Slice’s back, pinning him to the ground. Spike landed on Violet Wisp’s neck and began yanking her ears, causing her to shout in pain and rage. He let go when Gadget seized her by her armor with one mechanical hand and tossed her out the door, through the hallway, and into the wall on the other side.

“Listen you two, please!” Gadget cried. “We’re not your enemies!”

“That’s right!” Spike added. “Remember, we’re on the same side!”

“Celestia has declared you our enemies,” Violet Wisp said, struggling to stand. She looked to Gadget, her eyes jerking somewhat involuntarily.

“We must bring you in,” Orange Slice growled, trying to shove Gadget off of him.

“And that’s what we’ll do!” Violet Wisp shouted as she sprang forward suddenly. Gadget gasped at the sudden burst of speed from the pegasus as she tackled her and Spike. The momentum was enough to carry both of them backward, and they both crashed through the window.

Spike yelled in fear, but Gadget still managed to hold him with her forelegs while she caught herself with one mechanical hand.

“There they are!”

She turned to see Sea Hawk and Buttercup galloping over to her. Violet Wisp and Orange Slice were recovering inside. Hanging from a window was a terrible defensive position, she realized. She’d need to get some high ground.

“Hang on, Spike!” she shouted. Then, to everypony’s amazement, she shoved her mechanical fingers into the wall and, like some strange insect, simply began to climb the side of the wall, her mechanical arms helping her skitter up to the roof before anypony else could catch her.

Once they were atop the roof, Gadget set Spike down at last.

From below, she heard Sea Hawk call “Somepony get me a bullhorn!”

“Right away, Sarge!” Buttercup exclaimed.

A moment later, Gadget heard Sea Hawk’s amplified voice. She gingerly peered over the wall.

“Gadget, Spike, you might as well turn yourselves in!” he called. “We know you can’t send a letter to Celestia, and we’ve taken the precaution of cutting every telegraph wire leading out of Mustangia!”

“If I’m an enemy of Celestia, then why would I be trying to warn her about the conspiracy against her?”

Sea Hawk’s eyes drifted apart for a moment, his head lolling to the side. Then he shook his head and replied “It is Celestia’s will that she not be warned about the conspiracy against her!”

Gadget smacked her forehead, groaning.

“Whoa,” Spike whispered. “That’s some good brainwashing.”

“We’re not brainwashed!” Orange Slice shouted, flying out to stand next to his fellow Royal Guards. “I would know if I was brainwashed!”

Buttercup tapped his chin. “Ooh, but would you? I mean, I sure don’t feel brainwashed, but maybe it’s because I’m so brainwashed and…” He winced, rubbing his temples. “My head hurts.”

“It’s all right, guards,” said a familiar voice from just overhead. “Just trust that it is as Celestia wills it.”

Gadget turned and looked up, her eyes going wide. “Blue Blazer!” she cried.

Sure enough, Blue Blazer was there, wearing her trademark blue clothing and pillbox hat.

“It’s just wonderful to see you again, Gadget,” Blue Blazer said, crossing her forelegs as she looked down smugly at the young mare. “And you must be Spike the Dragon!”

“That’s right!” Spike said, puffing out his chest, looking up at her fiercely. “What did you do to our friends?”

“Nothing,” she said. “We would never harm them. Not unless we had to. And the same applies to you two. So listen carefully: surrender now. Take off those mechanical arms of yours, Gadget, and both of you lie flat on the ground on your bellies and we’ll take you into custody. And then, Gadget, I can show you that wonderful place I told you about!” She flashed a beaming smile. “I can take you to TechQuestria!”

Gadget cocked her head to the side. “Wait… ‘TechQuestria?’”

“Oh man, that is lame,” Spike said, shaking his head.

“That name, um, won the vote,” Blue Blazer grumbled. “A-anyway, I strongly suggest you surrender. Otherwise…”

Gadget heard a sound and saw that Orange Slice and Violet Wisp had flown up to opposite sides of the roof while Blue Blazer was distracting her. Violet Wisp had carried up Sea Hawk, and Orange Slice had, with no small effort and a lot of grunting, carried up Buttercup.

The four had them surrounded.

“So, Gadget, Spike, what do you think?” Blue Blazer asked.

“I think,” Gadget said quietly, “that you forgot two important rules.”

“Oh?” Blue Blazer asked, her expression darkening. “And what rules are those?”

“First of all,” Gadget said, a smirk appearing on her face, “I warned you about messing with earth ponies. But especially…”

Gadget stood on her hind legs. They all watched as, one by one, her mechanical hands retreated back into the wrists of her arms. Then each one was replaced by a different device. One hand was replaced with piston, another with a sparking electronic taser, another with a round shield made of interlocking plates in a pinwheel formation, and the last with a giant, vice-like claw.

They all gawked at the sight.

“...you should never mess with a genius!”

She raised her forelegs triumphantly and broke into mad, cackling laughter.

Jeez, Spike thought to himself as he swallowed. I’m sure glad she’s on our side.

Blue Blazer grit her teeth. "It seems you're a little more prepared after last time, Gadget," she muttered. "Well played."

“Spike,” Gadget whispered, “stay close to me. I’ll keep you safe, but I need you to watch my back, okay?”

“Oh! R-right!”

Gadget smirked. “Let’s show these ponies why we’re Equestria’s number one assistants!”

Spike chuckled. “Yeah. And once we’re done here, we’ll save our friends!”

Blue Blazer swallowed and tapped her radio earpiece. “Dispatch, come in. This is Blue Blazer… we’re going to need some backup.”

***

Twilight stood on a concrete platform and watched as a boxy machine exited a tunnel and trundled along a set of rails towards her, following a set of wires hung above it. Once it had come to a full stop in front of her, the doors on the side pushed out slightly and parted, opening wide.

She followed Cobbler inside, the guards still flanking her. Though the machine resembled a train and the principle was essentially the same, he referred to it as a ‘tram’.

A dozen or so ponies were inside, and when they saw Cobbler their eyes lit up and they all rose to their hooves.

“Mr. President!” said a mare. “Oh, would you like my seat?”

“No, no, I wouldn’t think of it,” he laughed. “There is plenty of room for us all.”

Then the ponies noticed Twilight. Though none approached her, she heard them whispering excitedly. She still hadn’t fully absorbed that these ponies idolized her no less - and perhaps even more - than the ponies of Equestria.

“I have a private tram for ease of transportation,” Cobbler whispered to her, “but I thought you might like to see our public transportation system first. What do you think?”

“It’s… um…”

She honestly didn’t know what to say. The interior of the car was simple, with bench seats with only the barest of cushioning, and the walls were dull and metallic, unlike the passenger cars she’d ridden while taking the railroad. Still, it moved swiftly, and she had to admire the ingenuity of the TechQuestrians in building an efficient means of getting around their underground city.

“It’s… nice.”

Cobbler frowned. “I suppose it is a bit spartan, but I thought you might have more to say than that,” he said. Then he shrugged. “Ah well. At least you seemed to enjoy the science fair.”

That was true enough. There had been a machine that produced ice without magic. Another invention was a substance so slick that it could cut friction down to almost nothing (the inventor was thinking of using it to coat pipes or perhaps pots and pans). There was a machine that could suck all the water out of food to preserve it in a matter of minutes, a box that could heat a substance with invisible energy, a device that detected things by bouncing sound waves off of them, and - most impressive to Twilight - a prototype for a glass panel that could turn sunlight into electrical energy.

“I have to admit, some of those things might benefit Equestria,” Twilight said, containing her enthusiasm. It wasn’t that she wasn’t appreciative, of course, but she just didn’t want to give Cobbler the satisfaction.

Cobbler’s mood, however, wasn’t the slightest bit deterred.

“Ha ha! And that’s just a sample of what I have to show you, Twilight! Oh, you are just going to be dazzled when you see what we’ve built!”

Twilight idly looked out the window. However, as the day wore on and the tour continued, even she couldn’t keep her enthusiasm totally in check.

TechQuestria, it turned out, was even bigger than she’d realized. Each “Department” was like a little village unto itself. The Computer Science Department was building a machine that surpassed the one Talon Turing was working on in terms of size and power. The Aeronautics Lab was building giant propellers, jets, and even rockets that they claimed could one day carry ponies - and their technology - into the heavens. Medical Research was building prostheses and a device that could magically scan text and produce synthetic speech for the blind. The Alchemy & Chemistry Department was working on using atmospheric nitrogen and hydrogen to create an ammonia-rich fertilizer to aid farming in barren lands. Acoustic Engineering was trying to make a machine that would use sound waves to break up kidney stones. Mechanical Engineering had plans to create automatic devices to do everything from making hay fries to vacuuming a floor to even building other machines.

In many of these cases, of course, the work was theoretical and nowhere near producing a fully functional model. Still, the enthusiasm, the energy, the hope that the ponies working there had was infectious. They greeted her warmly, asked what she thought, and asked her if she would want to see their work come to fruition on the surface.

After a few hours of this, she was wearing a smile as she trotted alongside Cobbler as they walked down a wide stone hallway with stucco decorations lining the walls.

“I see you’re enjoying yourself,” Cobbler said, his voice echoing in the empty hallway.

She paused, startled out of her thoughts by his question. “I…” She sighed, realizing she’d been caught up in the moment. “I have to admit it. These ponies and the things they’ve done really are amazing.” Then she paused. “How… how in the world did all this come to be? Where did all these ponies come from? For that matter, how can you afford to pay for all of this?!”

“Well, the first question is a bit of a long story, which I promise I shall tell you,” Cobbler said, holding up his hoof, “but as to the second, the answer is that many came from above, from all around Equestria and beyond, but found the current climate a bit inhospitable for innovators of their caliber. We offered them the chance to practice science as they pleased without interruption or restraint. And, well, in return for our pooling of resources, we all share the benefits. TechQuestria, through various aliases and dummy corporations, owns the rights on quite a few patents and collects their royalties.”

“Patents?”

“You’ve seen those headphones that can magically store music from a record? Shortwave radio earpieces? Automated electronic elevators?”

Twilight’s eyes bulged. “All those were you?”

“Indeed so. They keep some funds flowing in, but a lot of our work is funded through the donations of our more, ah, private supporters. Still… I must admit that financing this place is quite difficult.” He sighed. “Without government support, many of these future inventions will die on the vine.”

Twilight stopped in her tracks, narrowing her eyes.

Cobbler paused when he saw Twilight wasn’t following. “Twilight? Is something wrong?”

“Is that what this is all about?” she asked. “Money?”

Cobbler frowned. “In part. As mundane as it may seem, economics is a fact of life. But the larger problem is that Celestia’s created a climate of distrust in technology to the point that even private funding is difficult to procure. And all because of one little scare she had a century ago…”

“The one with your ancestor,” Twilight said. “Dearborn Crumble.”

“Yes,” he said bitterly, his expression souring. “Granddaddy created something that could have revolutionized the world, and in her fear, Celestia cast it aside.”

“Then this is about your grandfather?”

Cobbler chuckled. “Oh, my dear Twilight, if only it were that simple. It’s about a great many things.”

Twilight continued staring at him. “Professor Cobbler,” she said, “I appreciate this tour, but I think it’s time you told me what this is all for, and what you want from me.”

He looked at her for a moment, then nodded. “Very well. After all, you have been very patient and quite indulgent of me. Let me take you to your quarters, and then we can discuss this formally.”

She followed him through more twists and turns. She was quickly learning that the complex that made up TechQuestria may have expanded throughout the caverns below Mustangia, but those who’d built it had taken care to include multiple paths through each area. A pony could walk on hoof from the residential district via pathways and stairs to one of the major Departments to the Great Hall if they wished, or take the tram or a series of elevators. And what she’d seen, she knew, was just a fraction of the whole place.

In any case, eventually they arrived at a small, simply decorated room. Like everywhere else in TechQuestria, it had electric lights, and it also had a living room with a coffee table, a sofa, an armchair, and a bookshelf with a supply of modern and classic books. It also had a kitchen with an electric stove and running water, and a small bedroom with a single bed. It reminded Twilight a bit of the apartments or hotel rooms she’d seen in Manehattan, but with fewer frills. Still, she did notice the simple paintings on the wall and the potted plants on the tables.

“Would you care for some music?” Cobbler asked as Twilight sat on the sofa.

Twilight looked around. She didn’t see a record player anywhere.

“Oh, that’s right!” he laughed. “Well, allow me to show you something else we’ve cooked up.”

He went to a small, brown wooden box with knobs on it. He turned it, and a little panel on it began to glow. Twilight gasped as music emanated from it. It was a simple jazz tune with piano and a saxophone.

“A recording of some kind?” she asked.

“Long-range public radio,” Cobbler explained, taking a seat on the armchair. “We broadcast all over TechQuestria. In some spots, you can even pick up the signal on the surface. We’ve been thinking of introducing it to Mustang City, much like we have with the telephone. We use the town as a bit of a testing ground. It’s our hope that successes there will lead to successes across the rest of Equestria.”

Twilight nodded slowly. “I think that would be very nice,” she said. “But please, if we could get to the point? I’d really like to know what all this is for, and then I want to see my friends.”

“I can arrange a visit between a few of you at a time, but for the time being, I cannot allow you all in the same space.”

Twilight sat forward. “But why--”

“That little ‘light show’ of yours,” he said, raising an eyebrow. “It can only activate when you are in proximity to one another, and I’m not about to let you unleash it against our nation.”

Twilight made a face. “All right, then. But if you expect me to cooperate at all, you’d better have told me the truth when you said you hadn’t hurt them.”

“I can promise you that I have told the truth,” he said, removing his hat and placing it over his heart. “I regret having lied to you before, but from this point forward, I intend to be perfectly honest. And thus, I believe it is time to answer your main question: ‘What do we want?’”

He looked to the two guards and nodded. One stepped forward, drawing an envelope out of his uniform pocket. He opened it, removed some folded papers, and placed them flat on the coffee table.

Twilight began to read the words at the top of the page.

We, the Ponies of Equestria, in the spirit of Progress, Innovation, and Freedom, do hereby establish a new order. We do hereby reject a system which governs by the few, and create upon this nation a new governance not of Kings or Queens or Princesses, but of all ponies of all races…

Twilight read further, her eyes growing wide. Her mouth dropped open. At last, she looked up from the document and met Cobbler’s gaze.

“You want to overthrow Celestia… and make Equestria a Republic?”

Cobbler sat up, his chest swelling with pride. “Yes, Twilight Sparkle,” he said, his eyes lighting up as he replaced his hat. “It is our goal to bring an end to ‘The Kingdom of Equestria’ and make it a democratic republic. And we shall call this new nation ‘The Ponies’ Democratic Republic of Equestria!’”

Twilight only gawked at him.

“I know you must be stunned,” he said, “but consider this: every local government in Equestria is democratically voted upon. Why, your chosen hometown of Ponyville has an election next year!

“And yet,” he spat, “the national government was established a millennium ago as a diarchy! When Starswirl the Bearded and the rest of his ilk decided that the best way to unite the newly-formed nation was to have it ruled by a pair of alicorns, who carried traits of all three races, they might have had the stability of the nation in mind. But with Luna banished, Equestria has languished under the rule of a single pony. Why should it be so, I ask you, Princess Twilight? Do you not believe that no pony is greater than another? Why shouldn’t ponies of the nation control their own fate?”

“Professor,” Twilight said sharply. “Calm down.”

Cobbler blinked. It was then that he noticed that he’d gotten to his hooves and was leaning unsettlingly close to Twilight.

“Ah… I apologize,” he said, stepping back and straightening his jacket.

Twilight looked down. “Celestia… isn’t perfect,” she said. “I admit that. In fact, I’ve learned that more in the last six months than I’d ever imagined. But isn’t she a good ruler? We’ve had a thousand years of peace, with no major wars. Poverty is low, nopony goes hungry, and everypony is free to live the way they want. None of the technology you’ve been working on is illegal, even if it hasn’t caught on. Isn’t this a little… drastic?”

Cobbler pushed his lips in and out as he thought about how to respond. “Is she a good ruler? I… will begrudgingly admit that she is, in many respects. But though life in Equestria is satisfactory, it could be great. The technology which she has damned through faint praise or outright scorn could have revolutionized the land and made life for all ponies far greater than we could imagine!

“And besides, no matter how great a ruler she may be, no one pony should have all that power. And not for so long. If you’ll peruse that document further, you’ll find the makings of a constitution for a new Equestria, one with a government made up of elected representatives from every town and region, along with one executive officer. It is the way we’ve done things here in TechQuestria, my dear, and it has worked gloriously!”

“Except for your dumb, punny name,” Twilight said, smirking as she raised an eyebrow.

“Yes, well,” he grumbled, “no government governs perfectly. But the point is that we have representatives for all the civilian residents as well as a pony from each Department, and one Executive: me. I did not force my way into this position, Twilight Sparkle; I was elected as President.”

“And let me guess,” Twilight said, giving a roll of her eyes, “you want to be the new President of Equestria?”

Cobbler shook his head. “No, Princess Twilight. The ponies of Equestria will want somepony they know and admire. Somepony to bridge the gap between the days of royalty and the new era of democracy. Twilight Sparkle,” he said, pointing his hoof at her, “we want you to be President.”

To be continued...

Author's Notes:

President Twilight Sparkle, eh? Now that the conspirators have revealed themselves and their true intention, what will happen next? And what of Turing Test or Twilight's other friends? And why am I asking you when I'm the author and obviously know the answers? Next time...

A quick note here: if this chapter stirs some good conversation about political, moral, and ethical philosophy (it sure did with the editing team!), then I totally welcome that. However, this arc, Cobbler, TechQuestria, etc. are not intended as political commentary on the current post-election situation in the United States (November 2016). I do not want people getting into such arguments in the comments, so just as a note - anyone drawing direct parallels between them is getting their comment nuked. Sorry, but if you want to talk about Trump or Clinton, do it on Facebook.

Extra thanks go to my editing team, especially Reese, who helped revise this chapter and gave some great feedback on describing TechQuestria. Also to Greenfinger, my illustrator, who went the extra mile on the illustration for this chapter.

References:

-First of all, the title references the song "Welcome to the Machine" by Pink Floyd, one of my favorite old school bands.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lt-udg9zQSE

-The scene where Twilight is descending into TechQuestria is less a reference or homage, but I will admit that it was partly inspired by the opening to Bioshock. TechQuestria, however, has no splicers or Big Daddies and is in pretty good working order.

-When Gadget first appeared in chapter 2, she had a scene where she broke into mad, cackling laughter. Some wondered if that was a reference to Agatha Heterodyne in Girl Genius. It isn't, but I thought I'd let her bring out her inner mad scientist to play again. Editing team member KnightTemplar supplied this appropriate image and it's hard to deny that Gadget and Agatha might be cut from the same cloth.

One last thing: I put up a post discussing Professor Cobbler and 002's designs (along with some other surprises). Check it out, if you're of a mind to!

Well, that's all the time I have for now, folks, but hey...

FIFTY CHAPTERS! THANK YOU FOR ALL YOUR COMMENTS AND SUPPORT!

Welcome to the Machine, Part 2

View Online

Twilight only stared back at Cobbler, still processing what he’d just said. “M… me?!” she managed to gasp. “You want me to become the President of Equestria?!”

“I’m not personally interested in ruling Equestria, Twilight. I only wish to lead it to its future,” he said, giving a shrug of his shoulders. “But once I’ve done that, I just want a quiet life on my orchard.

“You, on the other hoof, have achieved greatness through your intelligence, your bravery, and your heart. Celestia declared you a Princess, but you were a hero long before that.” He smiled at her, his chest swelling with what seemed to be genuine admiration. “That is why, despite your royal status, you are loved by the ponies of TechQuestria. And your love of science was a deciding factor as well.”

Twilight looked down at the document. She blinked several times, absorbing all this. Then a thought occurred to her, and she looked up at Cobbler again.

“I get it now. That’s why,” she whispered. She looked up and met his eyes. “That’s why you sent Turing Test to me! You sent her to me because you knew I’d accept her because of my love of science and technology. You knew it might drive a wedge between Celestia and me.”

Cobbler bit his lip and looked away. “Well… yes. In part.”

“In part?”

“Never mind that,” he said, waving a hoof.

Twilight wore a smile. “I guess it doesn’t really matter… since you failed. Not only that, Celestia came around in her thinking and even made Turing Test a citizen of Equestria! You might have gotten closer to your goals because of Turing Test, and all because you didn’t make her lightning proof.”

Cobbler’s look soured. “I am not interested in Celestia’s little PR moves. Unit 003 belongs to us, Twilight Sparkle,” he said, “and Celestia’s mild warming up to one automaton is not the sea change we desire.”

Twilight got to her hooves. The security guards bristled, but Cobbler waved them off.

“Turing Test is not property, Professor Cobbler!” she shouted, glaring at him. “She’s my friend! She has rights! And… you know, I think I’ve been patient enough.” She squared her jaw. “I want to see her!”

Cobbler rolled his eyes and shook his head. “Oh, come now, Twilight Sparkle, I really don’t think--”

Twilight suddenly upended the coffee table, spilling the papers on top of it and sending them fluttering all around the room.

Cobbler stared at her like she was a madmare.

“I said want to see her! Now!” Twilight shouted. “You’re holding my friends and me against our will and asking all this of me, asking me to betray my friend and teacher, and I’ve had enough! I won’t cooperate with you in any way until I see Turing!”

Cobbler frowned. He grit his teeth. “All this wasted sentiment over one machine,” he grumbled. “Very well, Twilight Sparkle. If that’s what you wish, I suppose we’ll do this the hard way. But once I’ve acquiesced to your request, don’t say that I didn’t try to warn you.”

He walked over to a cabinet in the kitchen. He opened it and removed the candlestick-shaped telephone. He lifted the earpiece and tapped on the handle.

“Hello, Operator? This is the President speaking. Please connect me to the Central Command.” He paused a moment. “Good day, Commander Lugnut… Yes, I am still with the Princess. I would like you to get on the PA system and page Unit 003. Have her come to Executive Guest Room #1.”

Cobbler listened to the response on the other end.

“Yes… Yes, that will be fine… I am glad to hear that. I will attend to the other matters once my business with Twilight Sparkle is concluded… Very well. Goodbye.”

He hung up the receiver and walked back over to Twilight, who’d been staring at him the whole time, and held out a hoof. “Satisfied?” he asked.

She gave a single, silent nod, her stern expression unmoving.

“Then, in the meantime…”

He took hold of the table and the guards came over to help him right it. He then gathered up the papers and set them back on the table before Twilight.

She sat on the sofa and turned her head away from them.

“Now, Twilight, 003 will be here,” he said, offering her a smile. “Do you really intend to simply sit here in silence until she arrives?”

Twilight glanced back at him, her nostrils still flaring angrily. “I said I wouldn’t cooperate until I saw her.”

“And if that’s your choice, so be it,” he sighed. “Still, this is an opportunity to learn more about what we’re proposing. I’ll be glad to answer any questions you have. And… I should caution you that the time left to make a decision is dwindling.”

Twilight raised an eyebrow at that. “Dwindling? What do you mean? Is something going to happen soon?”

Cobbler grinned. “Oh yes. Very soon. So…?” He reached over to the documents and tapped them with his hoof.

Twilight growled, but held up the papers again, continuing to read them but keeping one eye on the nearby door, waiting for their guest to arrive.

***

Brass hooves tapped out a metallic rhythm on the catwalk, accompanied by the whirring sound of servos. Below the catwalk, tremendous round generators hummed loudly as massive blue pipes carried water from above ground to turn their turbines. Large cables carried the resulting electricity to the rest of TechQuestria.

She came down the steps and walked up behind the forepony, who wore a white coat, a hard hat, and rubber boots.

The forepony turned his head idly, then gave a small jump, whirling around when he suddenly saw her silently standing behind him.

“Cheese and crackers! You startled me!” he yelled, clutching his chest. “Did you bring the multimeter I asked for?”

She nodded and took the small device from her saddlebags.

“Good,” he said, taking it from her.

He turned and looked at the line of generators as they steadily churned out electricity.

“Heh,” he chuckled, pointing at the generators, “does this sight make you hungry?”

She cocked her head at him.

“Oh, never mind. You are relieved. Please attend to your next duty.”

Just then, the overhead PA system crackled as it came to life, and a voice was heard through the speakers, echoing throughout the stone chamber.

“Attention: Unit 003, President Cobbler has called you to Executive Guest Room #1. Go there as soon as you are able. I repeat: Unit 003, President Cobbler has called you to Executive Guest Room #1. Go there as soon as you are able. That is all.”

Her ears twitched as she looked up at the speakers mounted on the ceiling. She then looked back at the forepony with her large, glowing violet eyes.

“Well, never mind,” said the forepony. “I guess you’re needed elsewhere, 003.”

“Affirmative,” she said, nodding to him. “My Creator has called for me. I must answer.”

***

Sea Hawk fired another beam at Gadget, which she blocked with her shield in the nick of time.

“Knock it off!” Gadget yelled. “Um… oh! It is as Celestia wills it: stop being brainwashed!”

The four guards continued staring her down.

“Guess it doesn’t work for just anypony,” she grumbled. “Well, it was worth a try!”

“Behind you!” Spike shouted, and she whirled around to see Orange Slice taking another opportunity to dive bomb her. She tried to seize him with her claw, but he broke off his dive and swooped away at the last moment.

The two of them had been holding the attack off, barely, but the Royal Guards were no slouches, and even with all of her arms now equipped with weapons, she could still only do so much. Whenever the supposed backup that Blue Blazer had called arrived, things would get much tougher.

“Spike,” she hissed through gritted teeth, “I need you to help protect my flank a little more!”

“I’m trying to keep an eye out, but they’re fast!” he cried, his back pressed to her side.

“I need more than just an extra set of--”

She saw a purple blur and held up her taser protectively before Violet Wisp could tackle her. The nimble pegasus dodged out of the way and tried to get closer, but Gadget brought down the piston, intending to pin her to ground. Violet Wisp jumped back, aided by a powerful flap of her wings as the piston missed her by mere inches and sent a resounding shockwave through the roof of the building.

“Ugh! Like I was saying,” Gadget continued, “I need more than an extra set of eyes! I need some firepower!”

Spike gulped. “Well, I’m not sure what you think I’m supposed to--”

“No, Spike, I mean literal firepower!” Gadget exclaimed.

“You… you want me to breathe fire at ponies?!” he cried, gawking at her in openmouthed horror. “But… but Twilight said I should never do that!”

“Well, Twilight isn’t here now, Spike, and it’s because these jerks took her and the others!”

Spike bit his lip. “But I… I…”

Gadget whirled around, raising all her arms around the both of them and waving them wildly to give them a momentary bubble of safety as she seized his face, her muzzle almost pressed to his nose as they sat in the calm in the center of a mechanical storm.

“Spike… please.”

He stared up at her, into her pleading, fear-filled eyes.

“I can’t do this without you,” she said. “I need an edge. I need you!”

He blinked back at her, then gave her a toothy grin.

“Well, in that case,” he said, winking at her. “Reeeaady…”

She tilted her head at him, not understanding.

“Aiiiim…”

Her eyes bulged, and she smiled as she understood.

Outside the whirling storm of mechanical limbs, the four guards were looking for an opportunity, all of them unable to hear what their two targets were saying until the limbs suddenly fell away as Spike hopped onto Gadget’s back and leapt into the air, taking a deep breath.

Gadget ducked, holding her hooves over her head, and shouted, “FIRE!!”

Spike opened his mouth and from it came a massive plume of green fire that burst forth in a torrent of scalding heat. Violet Wisp and Orange Slice flew back in a panic as Spike turned, directing the fire in a huge arc moving left.

Sea Hawk put up a magical shield to protect himself and Buttercup, but he could still feel the intense heat as the flames splashed against the magical barrier. Buttercup whimpered and held his forelegs over his face.

The heat cleared just as the shield began to weaken and buckle. With a relieved sigh, Sea Hawk dropped the shield and waved away the cloud of smoke as he began to cough.

“Buttercup!” he shouted. “Take them down before they can do that again!”

“Yes sir!” Buttercup shouted back, dashing through the smoke.

But with his vision obscured, he didn’t see that one of Gadget’s arms was lying limply on the ground in wait, perfectly still until he was close enough. The limb came to life, and the piston rocketed up into his jaw, uppercutting him so hard that it actually lifted him into the air.

The massive earth pony tumbled backwards and landed in a heap, unconscious from the massive blow.

Gadget wore a smug grin. “Gotcha,” she said with a chuckle.

Sea Hawk heard a warlike yell and turned to see Spike running at him. He aimed a bolt of magic at the little dragon, but Gadget blocked it with her shield just in time. Spike then vaulted over the shield, leaping at him. The dragon opened his mouth, and another blast of fire shot at him.

Sea Hawk couldn’t get his shield up in time, and scrambled backwards as the flames began to singe his fur. In his panic, he didn’t realize he was already to the rim of the rooftop until he stumbled over it and lost his footing.

Spike gasped and tried to run to catch him - he had only wanted to repel him, not force him from the roof - but gravity took hold, and Sea Hawk fell back, tumbling roughly to the ground below.

“Sarge! Buttercup!” Violet Wisp screamed.

“That’s it!” Orange Slice bellowed. “You’re dead, you metal-armed freak!”

The two pegasi both shot at Gadget in a blind rage. Vanderbull had told her before that one should always mind one’s temper, even in heated negotiations, because anger makes a pony do stupid things. She smirked, realizing that she was seeing this in action.

She used her arms to propel herself backwards, leaping out of the way as the two pegasi collided into each other right where she’d been standing. As they both staggered back, she made her move.

Gadget brought her taser around swiftly and struck Violet Wisp in the back, right between the wings. She screamed, convulsing with electricity for a moment before Gadget released her and she crumpled to the ground, groaning and twitching.

As for Orange Slice, he was seized with her claw and held, squirming and protesting all the while.

“Let me go, you four-eyed punk!” he growled.

She ignored the insult and held him up in front of her. “Tell me where our friends are!” she shouted.

“Probably being taken to the royal dungeon in Canterlot!” Orange Slice said.

She looked into his unfocused eyes and sighed. “Oh, right. Still brainwashed. Well, I hate to hurt you and the other guards, but since I can’t have you conscious…”

Using her clawed arm, she raised him up and smashed him into the ground, thrashing him a few more times for good measure before holding him up. He was groaning, head lolling.

Gadget smiled and was about to set him down when she heard something over her shoulder. She looked and saw that Blue Blazer was still hovering nearby.

“Dispatch, hurry up!” she was exclaiming, holding her hoof to her radio earpiece. She took it out and practically screamed into it. “Hello? I must have backup, now!”

Gadget grinned. “Never mind, Orange Slice. Maybe you can still help me!”

Still holding him, she wound her arm up, spinning him rapidly before throwing him like a baseball right at Blue Blazer.

The hapless mare looked up from the radio just in time to see an unconscious Royal Guard rocketing towards her. She screeched in fear as he slammed into her, knocking the earpiece out of her hoof and knocking her beloved hat off her head in the process. The two went sailing in a long arc before tumbling to the ground.

“Ugh,” Blue Blazer groaned as she tried to sit up. That’s when she noticed that Orange Slice was still lying unconscious on top of her. “Get off, you! It is as Celestia wills it, you hear? Hello?”

There was a mechanical sound above her. She looked up, and her expression fell.

Gadget was standing over her, all of her limbs curved around and pointed right at her menacingly. Spike rode on her back, baring his sharp, reptilian fangs.

“I don’t think even brainwashing will let you order a knocked-out guard, Blue Blazer,” Gadget said, smirking at her. “But you’re not brainwashed, are you?”

Blue Blazer gulped.

“So, in that case,” Gadget said as she glowered down at her, “start talking!”

“Yeah!” Spike added. “Tell us where our friends are!”

Blue Blazer’s eyes shifted from right to left as she looked around for help in vain.

“Those other two ponies that were here ran off, it looks like,” Gadget said. “It’s just you left.”

“Not quite.”

As Gadget jerked her head back in surprise, there was a sound; a magical bolt struck her in the side, and she tumbled away, Spike tumbling with her. She scrambled to her hooves to see who had attacked her. Her jaw dropped when she saw who stood there.

Robots. Two of them.

There was a small, feminine one with a drooping mane and one glowing yellow eye. Next to her stood a massive, masculine robot with a glowing horn. He was most likely the one who’d attacked her, she reasoned.

“Thank goodness you’re here!” Blue Blazer shouted, shoving Orange Slice off of her as she took to the air. “I can’t imagine what that crazy girl would have done!”

“Come down here and you won’t have to imagine it!” Gadget shouted.

“I’ll leave it to you, then, 002, 004!” Blue Blazer said hastily as she flew off to a safe distance.

“Wait… 004?” Gadget cried.

“That’s the robot that attacked Ponyville and took Turing Test!” Spike shouted, hiding behind Gadget, who raised her arms protectively.

“Affirmative,” he said. “This unit was tasked with Unit 003’s retrieval. We have come to apprehend you. Surrender and you will not be harmed.”

“It is as he says,” 002 added. “But before then, I must say… you are very interesting!”

Gadget made a face, partly because of the unexpected comment, and also because of 002’s slow, dissonant voice. It was feminine, but harsh and metallic, like the sound of scrap metal being tossed into a bucket and crushed.

“Interesting?” she asked.

“Many organics enjoy machines,” she said, holding out a hoof. “You, however, are part machine. Those limbs… he spoke of them.”

“He? He who?”

“Master Umahara. He met you in Ponyville while performing covert surveillance.”

Gadget gasped. “Fine Print!”

“Correct. His pseudonym. But is it true that you can feel sensation in those limbs, even though they are artificial?”

Gadget frowned, narrowing her eyes. “Yes,” she said slowly. “Why?”

002 tossed her head back. “A pity. Sensation is an organic weakness. To imbue it into superior metal limbs is a strategic oversight. After all,” she said, taking a step toward her, “if an opponent - like 004, for instance - were to rip them off, you would feel a great amount of pain, wouldn’t you?”

Gadget laid her ears flat and began to step back.

“Is that a confirmation? Would it hurt? Would you scream? I would like to know.”

Spike stuck close to Gadget. “What the heck is wrong with that robot?”

“I don’t know,” she whispered back. “But she’s not like Turing Test! Not at all!”

“I recently assisted in the capture of your comrades alongside 004,” 002 replied as both she and 004 kept pace. “I had not experienced the sounds of discomfort and pain and fear in such a way before. Forgive me… I simply found it an interesting new experience.

“But I suppose I am different from my successors,” she added. “Unit 003 was equipped with the ability to transform into different modes to emulate the abilities of ponies. 004 is capable of two, and his combat capabilities were more than sufficient to retrieve 003. But I was designed with more mundane purposes in mind. To assist, to operate, to facilitate. However, they did grant me one unique ability… that of control.”

Her eye glowed and suddenly a loud buzzing sound was heard. Gadget glanced up and gasped as the sky overhead was filled with a few dozen strange devices that flew using loud, buzzing propellers.

“What in Equestria are those?!” Gadget cried.

“Security drones,” 002 replied. “Small aerial devices designed to deter intruders. I was granted the ability to control them and various other TechQuestrian devices remotely. Many are equipped with weapons: buzz saws, tasers, and the like. If you do not surrender, I may be forced to deploy them against you.”

004 turned his head. “002, we have been ordered not to cause severe bodily harm to any ponies.”

She was silent for a moment before slowly turning to look at him. “But she didn’t know that.” She made a sound that Gadget swore sounded like a sigh. “No matter. ‘Severe’ is a very relative term. 004, let us proceed.”

“Acknowledged.”

Gadget gasped as 004 suddenly rushed toward her. She’d heard from the others that he was faster than he looked, and it seemed they hadn’t been exaggerating. She barely got her arms up in time to block him as he tried to tackle her. She gripped him with her claw, but it took every ounce of her strength to hold him back, digging her hooves into the ground as she did so.

“Gadget!” Spike cried.

004 continued moving forward, pushing her back as her hooves began to slide in the dirt. She grit her teeth, sweat forming on her brow, but the tremendous force behind him was growing steadily.

“Nnng! All right, then… take this!” She raised her taser and jammed it into 004’s neck.

The electricity sparked and crackled across his metallic exterior, but he gave no indication that it was affecting him at all.

“Surrender,” he said, his voice a low electronic growl.

“You first!” she shouted back. She raised her other arm, the one with the piston, and used it to rapidly begin pummeling 004 in the face, a series of metallic clangs echoing throughout the area. “Go to sleep, go to sleep, go to sleep!”

This too seemed to have little effect, however, as 004 took punch after punch.

“Surrender,” he repeated.

“I suggest you comply,” 002 said as she calmly strode up behind her robotic comrade. “After all, you cannot hold him back much longer. And you still have to worry about my drones.”

As if on cue, half a dozen drones moved in closer, hovering just above Gadget and 004. The sound of their buzzing propellers grew louder as they approached.

One of them produced a pair of sawblades at the end of a pair of skinny metallic arms. It dove at her, and she gasped, swatting it away and shattering it with one of her other arms, which caused 004 to advance further.

She winced. The saw blades had struck against her arm, and though the damage was minor, she could feel the odd, painful sensation of it.

“You see? That was just one. I have many more. You cannot block them all. You are defeated. Surrender.”

“Shut up!” Gadget growled. “I can protect myself against your dumb toys all day!”

002 tilted her head at that. “Is that so? Show me.”

Her eye glowed brighter, and the remaining five nearby drones all dove at Gadget simultaneously.

Gadget screamed and freed two of her arms from holding back 004 to swat at the drones. Two more with sawblades were reduced to shattered machinery, another fired a sticky substance that she avoided before tossing the drone into a fourth, and the fifth one managed to shoot her in the barrel with a rubber pellet, causing her to cry out in pain before she smashed that one as well. All the while, 004 pushed her until at last she slipped and fell onto her back. She was still holding 004 back, barely, but she knew she was in a vulnerable position.

“Very good. You were correct when you said you could protect yourself. However…”

“Gadget, help!”

Gadget looked up and saw that in the commotion, a larger drone had swooped in and fired a claw at the end of a wire which had seized Spike in a vice-like grip before reeling him in like a fish on a hook. Once it captured him, it began to move away.

“Spike!” Gadget screamed. “Hang on!”

“He will not need to hang on. The drone will do that. And now, you should remember,” 002 added, “that 004 stated that we have been ordered not to cause severe bodily harm to ponies.”

She looked up at Spike, who glowered back at her.

“However, he is not a pony.”

The drone suddenly took off vertically and rose swiftly into the air. Gadget cried out in horror as she heard Spike scream. The sound rapidly grew softer as the drone carried him higher and higher.

“Let him go!” Gadget cried.

“Do you mean that literally?” 002 asked, tilting her head at her.

“N-no, wait! Don’t!” She looked up at 002 as she pleaded, her eyes filling with angry tears. “Please… don’t hurt him!”

“Organics often regard their comrades’ lives with the utmost importance,” 002 said, her tone almost casual. “I wondered if a pony that was partly mechanical would be different. You are not.”

004 bore down on Gadget, his muzzle only a few feet from hers.

Gadget looked around frantically, trying to spy some hope of escaping. But all she could see were the two robots and the sky filled with drones. Blue Blazer was nearby, and the Royal Guards might regain consciousness any moment. And even if she could escape, what would they do to Spike?

“You will surrender now,” 004 said.

“Unless you wish to resist further,” 002 said, casting her cycloptic gaze skyward. “I will accept your choice. I wonder, however… what sort of sound will your dragon friend make when he falls from such a great height? I am very curious…”

She didn’t turn her head, but with her one eye, she looked down at Gadget.

Gadget opened her mouth to speak but fell silent at last. She bowed her head, closing her eyes in resignation.

“No. Please don’t hurt him,” she said quietly. “I surrender.”

She relaxed her arms, letting 004 place his heavy hoof on her chest, holding her to the ground.

“As predicted,” 002 said. Her eye glowed again, and the drone holding Spike slowly descended, though it still held him a few meters off the ground. “Even if you had not, 004 could have enabled his E-Mode. If he had used that much force, though, you might have been injured, and our masters wish for you to be treated with care. Still, you have caused enough trouble…”

Another pair of drones descended from the swarm above. One hovered next to Gadget’s head and the other next to Spike’s. A nozzle extended from the devices and sprayed them both with gas. The two of them coughed a few times before the gas took hold and they both fell unconscious, sedated. As Gadget passed out, her weapons retreated back into her arms, the mechanical hands sliding back into place.

“Well, it seems you were successful,” Blue Blazer said, fluttering down to them. “Good work, you two.”

“Acknowledged,” 004 replied.

“We exist to serve, Mistress,” 002 added.

“Still,” Blue Blazer continued, making a sour face as she looked to the unconscious dragon, “I don’t like the fact that you placed Twilight Sparkle’s assistant in danger, 002. She would never agree to help us if we did something horrible to him!”

“My apologies,” 002 said, bowing to her. “I merely operated within the parameters that were specified.”

“Correct,” 004 said, standing alongside his sister. “002’s strategy of threatening Spike the Dragon did not violate any given orders.”

“Well… just the same, don’t do it again!” Blue Blazer snapped. “004, we have carts just up the road. Place them inside so we can take them back to Central Command for processing.”

“Understood,” he replied, and lifted Gadget and Spike’s unconscious bodies with his magic, carrying them away.

Blue Blazer turned to 002.

“You have further orders, Mistress?”

Blue Blazer narrowed her eyes. “002… you seemed like you were enjoying yourself back there.”

002 only stared back at her, still as a statue.

“Respond, 002,” Blue Blazer said irritably.

“How shall I respond, Mistress? I am an automaton. It has been declared that only living creatures possess true emotions. If that is true, then how is it possible for me to experience enjoyment?”

Blue Blazer crinkled her nose. “If I didn’t know better, 002, I’d swear you were being a smartflank.”

002 continued to stare at her, her singular yellow eye glowing in the dark field behind her visor. “However, you do know better, Mistress.”

Blue Blazer sighed. “Take your drones and accompany 004, 002. I’ll attend to the Royal Guards and follow you shortly.”

“Acknowledged, Mistress,” 002 said, walking away.

Blue Blazer watched her go. Note to self: have a talk with the President about 002, she thought. Once the new government is established, we need to either dismantle or reprogram that creepy robot. She’s not a thing like her sister…

She paused, her head drooping as her ears went back. She frowned.

“Y-you…!”

Blue Blazer turned and gasped when she saw Sea Hawk slowly walking towards her. His eyes were unfocused, but he was straining, as if forcing his limbs to work as he strode toward her.

“Y-you did something… to us… my comrades! How… how d-dare you!”

His horn glowed.

“It is as Celestia wills it!” Blue Blazer shouted. “Stop where you are!”

Sea Hawk stopped in his tracks, but he shut his eyes, groaning and straining as he tried to push forward, the veins in his forehead sticking out.

“It is as Celestia wills it!” she shouted again. “Halt and stand down!”

Sea Hawk finally froze, his muscles relaxing. “Understood,” he whispered.

“Good,” Blue Blazer said, placing her hoof on her chest as she sighed with relief. “Gather your comrades. Once they’re able, we’ll proceed to the Launch Base. We may need extra security before tomorrow.”

“Understood,” he said again, and slowly walked back to rouse the other guards.

***

Twilight’s eyes scanned the next page, taking in more details about how this supposed Republic would work. She betrayed no outward emotion of any kind, however, even as Cobbler sat by, watching her with a patient smile.

“You’ve been very quiet,” he said at last. “Surely you must have some questions for me?”

Twilight paused, tapping her chin, then wordlessly went back to reading.

Cobbler’s smile wavered for a moment. “Either you’re being very thorough and saving your questions until the end, Twilight,” he said, “or you’re just giving me the silent treatment in an attempt to get my goat. Now, which is it, really?”

Twilight gave him a sideways glance, raising an eyebrow. Then she went right back to reading.

“Why, I thought you might be a bit more mature, my dear.” Cobbler leaned back. “I’ll be blunt, Twilight: if you insist on being belligerent, then I’m content to just leave you and attend to my other duties. I do have things I could be doing.”

He sighed and got to his hooves.

“Celestia,” Twilight said at long last.

Cobbler froze. “Yes?” he asked.

“What if she actually agrees to your plans for a Republic? And what if she decides to run for President instead of me? Or even against me? She could win, you know; almost all of Equestria loves her.”

“Oh, that would not be possible,” Cobbler replied, sitting back down and giving a dismissive wave of his hoof. “Our proposed constitution requires term limits, and they are retroactive. Thus, nopony who has been the sole leader of Equestria can serve for more than three terms of five years. Fifteen in total, that is, and Her Majesty has most certainly exceeded that.”

Twilight found the section he was talking about and nodded. “I’m also a little confused about this part about… Parliament? You want ponies to vote for representatives to be part of the government too?”

“Well, we can’t have all the power of government in only one pony,” Cobbler explained. “So the ponies in Parliament will be elected to represent different regions of Equestria. They’ll propose laws, vote on them, etc., and receive the President’s approval or disapproval. Thus there will be some balance in the government, and it’s all thanks to democracy!”

Twilight noted the proud smile on Cobbler’s face and saw that it was mirrored on the guards’ faces as well when he pronounced that last word.

“Democracy is really important to you, isn’t it?” Twilight asked.

Cobbler raised an eyebrow. “Why, Twilight, do you disagree with that notion? Democracy is, after all, the fairest and most equal system. As it stands at present, Celestia is the ultimate authority; even the Ministers on her council are chosen exclusively by her.” He clicked his tongue, shaking his head. “And many of them hold positions that have been held by their aristocratic families for generations. Why, those fools are nothing but stuffy, stagnant Canterlot nobles who have about as much in common with the average pony as a griffon has with a timberwolf!”

Twilight bit her lip. She had to admit that Cobbler had a point. She’d grown up in Canterlot, and there certainly was no shortage of aristocratic snobbery. She’d met some of the Ministers both before and certainly after becoming a princess. Most had seemed capable, she thought, but a few made her wonder what Celestia could have seen in them. Still, if Celestia had appointed them, she’d reasoned, then there must be good reasons.

After the last several months, however, seeing Celestia’s bias against technology and against Turing Test, she’d started to question some of her former mentor’s decisions. She was wise, to be sure, but still just one pony, and every pony was fallible.

“You’re right that the system we have may not be perfect, and it may not be democratic,” Twilight said, “but, honestly, I don’t think what you’re planning is very democratic either.”

Cobbler frowned. “How can you say such a thing? This constitution clearly describes--”

“I know,” Twilight said, holding up her hoof, “but it doesn’t describe how you intend to establish your republic. You keep mentioning a plan, and you say it’s going to happen ‘very soon.’ So let me see if I’ve figured it out…”

She took a deep breath.

“In order to establish the republic, you need to depose Celestia. In other words, a coup d’etat. But you’ll also need more support than you currently have. You need to keep chaos from breaking out all over the country. Now, it just so happens that there’s one event that’s happening soon - happening already, in fact - where Celestia and important ponies from all around Equestria are together in one place: the National Conference.” She narrowed her eyes at him. “You’re going to attack the National Conference, depose Celestia, and get the leaders from around Equestria to support your cause by signing your Constitution. That’s also why you want me to voice my support, because if local leaders and especially a Princess of Equestria are on your side, ponies will be more likely to accept your new government.”

Cobbler’s smile grew. He actually gave a short bit of applause. “Very good, Twilight,” he said. “You are indeed as bright as your reputation would indicate.”

“But you’re forgetting something, Professor,” Twilight said, her expression darkening.

“Oh? And what’s that?” he asked.

“The whole point of this is to give ponies a voice in their government. You want them to have a choice,” she said. “But a coup is the exact opposite of a choice: you’re forcing a new government on them. You’re forcing them to accept your views!”

He was silent for a moment. Then, in a voice that was still calm even as his expression grew stonier, he asked “Twilight, do you know what is more important than freedom?”

Twilight rubbed her chin. “Love? Safety? Friendship?” She paused, mulling it over. “Honestly, there are a lot of important things in life. Maybe they aren’t more important, but they’re at least as important as--”

“No, no, Twilight,” he said, shaking his head. “The answer is nothing. Absolutely nothing is more important than freedom. A pony should have the right to choose, but that does not include choosing to reject freedom, or the responsibility it carries. What we are offering is so vital that it would be immoral to reject it: freedom for all ponies!”

“Says the pony who’s holding my friends and me against our will!” Twilight shouted, standing as she slammed her forehooves on the table. “Says the pony who brainwashed four innocent Royal Guards! You’re one to talk about morality and freedom!”

“We had no choice about that!” Cobbler shouted back, likewise slamming his hooves on the table. “We only did that to protect ourselves!”

Twilight wrinkled her nose, frowning at him. “Oh, really?” she asked sarcastically.

“Yes, really,” he replied, mimicking her sarcastic tone. “About a year ago, Buttercup and Orange Slice were trailing what they thought was some ordinary, run-of-the-mill smuggler, but they’d actually come across one of our suppliers bringing us raw materials. We had to capture them, but we knew that keeping them prisoner indefinitely would only cause a massive investigation once they failed to return. Nor could we release them, obviously. Nor could we even use our serum to erase their short term memories… they’d seen too much for the serum to erase, as it only works on up to an hour’s worth of memories. By the time they got to us, it was too late.

“However, we had an earlier prototype of the serum that had an unintended side effect: it caused a pony to be highly susceptible to suggestion. With some generous doses and a few days’ worth of conditioning, we were able to send them back to their comrades. To cover our tracks, though, we needed to place Violet Wisp and Sea Hawk under our control as well. We’d hoped we’d never have to use it, but it allows us to operate without fear of the local chapter of the Royal Guard interfering with us.”

Twilight’s expression did not soften. “So the ends justify the means?”

Cobbler ran his tongue around his cheek, considering that. Finally, he nodded. “Yes. I suppose that is a succinct way to put it.”

“And that’s why you’re holding me prisoner. And my friends.”

“Yes, but again, I want to stress--”

“That’s why you sent 004 to attack my home.”

“Twilight, I--”

“And that’s what you’ll probably tell yourself when you attack the National Conference with whatever machines or weapons you’ve built down here!”

Cobbler’s eyes bulged and he took a step back. “Twilight, I… you have it all wrong!” he stammered. “I’m not out to harm anypony! None of us are!”

“But you are hurting ponies, Cobbler,” Twilight said, heaving a sigh as she tried to calm down. “Every step of the way, you’re hurting ponies. You’re telling me you’re going to stage a coup unarmed?”

Cobbler hesitated. “No. We intend to use them only as a show of force and to defend ourselves. We don’t wish to use them on anypony. We would rather Celestia and Luna surrender peacefully.”

“And then what?” Twilight asked. “Will you put them in prison?”

“We were thinking exile to the Crystal Empire, actually,” he replied. “If they want to keep raising the sun and moon, as I imagine they will, then we see nothing wrong with it. If they intend to use their abilities as leverage, though, we have the Sun Sphere for that.”

“That explains why you built it, then. You needed some insurance.”

“It always pays to be prepared,” Cobbler said with a smirk. “After all, that’s why we sent 003 to try and slowly win you to our side in the first place. But since you’re here, you may want to consider joining us anyway. We expect, once we’ve shown the world what we have to offer, that most ponies will accept the new republic. After all, their daily lives will be mostly the same, just with modern conveniences that will improve their lives and an election every now and again.

“However, we understand that a large number of ponies may reject the new republic, and that could lead to some strife that I’m certain we’d both like to avoid.” He frowned, steepling his hooves. “I absolutely detest violence, Twilight. Having your approval could preserve peace and harmony. Can you appreciate that?”

Twilight had opened her mouth to respond when they were both startled by a sudden knock on the door. They both looked to see one of the guards open it slightly, checking to see who was there.

“Oh, there you are! The President has been expecting you.”

Twilight’s ears twitched, and she gasped as she heard the familiar whirring of servos. The door opened wide, and somepony walked in, though she knew in an instant who it was.

“I am here, Creator. How may I assist you?”

The robot standing there was unmistakeable. Her metallic exterior shined under the lights of the room. Her four limbs each terminated in a brass hoof. Her ears squeaked quietly on their hinges as they raised and lowered. The circular coils of her mane and tail rustled slightly as she moved. She stared into the room with large, round, glowing violet eyes. And her high-pitched synthetic voice was one that Twilight had heard thousands of times.

It was Turing Test.

“Turing Test!” Twilight cried, startling Cobbler and the guards as she leaped over the table at the mechanical mare. She flung her forelegs around her in a tight hug. “It’s you! They fixed you! Oh, Turing, I… I was so worried!”

Cobbler and the guards all stared on, mouths agape at this strange display.

Turing, however, had no reaction. She said nothing and made no movement. She didn’t even return Twilight’s embrace.

Twilight drew back, leaving her hooves on Turing’s shoulders. She smiled broadly at her, holding back tears of happiness. “Oh… Turing, I’m sorry, I’m just so glad to see you’re all right.”

Turing’s ears twitched. She looked slightly to her right to look at Cobbler.

“Creator, I am uncertain what is occurring. How shall I proceed?”

Twilight froze. “T-Turing?”

Cobbler sighed. “Our guest here wished to speak to you, 003,” he said. “Indulge her for a short time, then return to your duties.”

“Understood.” She turned to Twilight, who was still staring back at her. “Greetings. I am an automaton, a mechanical pony. My designation is Unit 003M, or simply ‘003.’ My primary directive is to assist and protect all citizens of the Nation of TechQuestria. My end user is Professor Cobbler Mustang, my creator. How may I assist you today?”

The truth slowly began to dawn on Twilight. She swallowed.

“Come on, Turing Test, don’t you know me?”

“Scanning visual memory… no match found. My apologies, but I do not recognize you,” she replied. “I also do not recognize the designation ‘Turing Test.’ As stated, I am designated Unit 003M, or simply 003. Perhaps you have mistaken me for another?”

“No!” Twilight shouted, practically shaking her by the shoulders. “Listen, your name is Turing Test! It’s the name I gave you! You,” she paused, swallowing, “you thanked me for naming you that. Don’t… don’t tell me your memory was damaged! Try to remember!”

Turing’s eyes shifted slightly, constricting briefly before returning to normal size. “Scanning… no error in memory detected.”

“Try!” Twilight cried, her voice breaking. “There must be something! Try to remember… that time you got a new paint job because you wanted to look prettier, for example! And then you got rained on! You were so… so sad.”

She began to sniffle, even as the robot stared back at her in silence.

“Or there’s the race you had with Rainbow Dash! That time you spent learning jokes with Pinkie! Try to remember how Fluttershy helped you when you doubted yourself! Remember helping on Applejack’s farm! Remember your play, the Crusaders, Dr. Turing, Gadget and Mr. Vanderbull!”

Turing stared back at her. “Memory not found.”

Tears formed in Twilight’s eyes and began to fall. “Then… then remember Maud Pie! Don’t you remember the relationship you had? You cared so much for her, and she felt the same way about you! Sweet Celestia, Turing, you have a special somepony, and I know she misses you!”

The guards exchanged looks with each other. Cobbler’s eyes bulged.

“A… relationship?” Cobbler breathed.

“I can find no data regarding any such relationship,” Turing replied. “Again, are you very certain that you have not mistaken this unit for somepony else? Unlike organic ponies, automata are not capable of experiencing the emotions necessary to maintain a relationship, such as love.”

Twilight let out a sob. “You… you really don’t remember any of it, do you? You don’t even know who I am.” She raised her hoof to try to wipe her eyes. “Everything you experienced with me in the last six months… is it really all gone?”

The robot stared back at her. Her gaze was steady, and though Turing had never been capable of much expression, the utter lack of even the slightest movement, and the way she stared at Twilight like she was no more than furniture conveyed a sense of nothingness. The look Turing was giving her was blank. Vacant.

Empty.

“I have been active for the last three days, four hours, and twenty-nine minutes. I was reactivated following emergency repairs. My memory unit contains only information since that reactivation.”

“No…” Twilight hung her head. “No, no, no! T-Turing, please… oh, Turing Test…”

She continued saying Turing’s name again and again, her voice growing weaker as she broke down, the tears streaming down her face.

“You appear to be showing signs of pain or emotional distress,” Turing said. “Perhaps there is something I can do to alleviate this. Now attempting comfort.”

She slowly raised her hoof and gently, if stiffly, patted Twilight on the back repeatedly. Twilight looked up and met her eyes.

“There there,” Turing said. “There there.”

Twilight was still crying, but through her tears, she let out a small chuckle.

Turing stopped patting her. “Have my actions alleviated your distress?”

“No,” Twilight whispered, “it’s just… somehow, even without your memories, you’re still the same pony. No matter what they do to you, you’re still my friend.”

She steadied herself and embraced Turing once more, trying in vain to hold back tears.

“Friend?” Turing asked. “That is not in my programming, but if designating me your friend is helpful to you, then I will accept that designation.”

Twilight nodded. “I promised I would never send you away, Turing,” she whispered. “And I don’t care if you can’t remember me. I swear, I won’t abandon you.”

Cobbler cleared his throat. “I apologize, but I think it might be best if we continue this another time,” he said, looking away as if embarrassed. “Please return to your duties, 003. I’ll attend to Twilight Sparkle.”

Turing’s ears went straight up.

“Twilight Sparkle,” she said, echoing the words.

Twilight froze. She gently let Turing go and stepped back. “Y-yes,” she said. “That’s me. My name is Twilight Sparkle.”

Turing was silent for a moment. “Understood. I will remember you, Twilight Sparkle.”

Twilight swallowed the lump in her throat. “I’m glad to hear that. Goodbye, Turing Test.”

“I still do not recognize that designation,” she replied as she turned to go, “but I will accept it if you insist. Goodbye, Twilight Sparkle.”

Without another word, the guards opened the door for her, and she walked out into the corridor. They shut the door behind her, and Twilight listened as the sound of metal hooves on the stone floor receded. Once they’d grown too quiet to hear, she hung her head, softly crying in the silence left behind.

The guards looked to Cobbler, who in turn only glanced around, as if looking for help. For the first time, he truly looked uncertain of what to do next.

“I… I hadn’t anticipated such a strong reaction from you, Twilight,” he said at last.

“She was my friend,” Twilight whispered. “How else could I respond?”

“I knew that you called her your friend, but I imagined some sort of relationship like… like a pet, or a child with a favorite toy… I didn’t expect… that.”

Twilight glanced up at him with reddened, tear-filled eyes. “She was so kind… and funny… and s-sweet--”

Her sobs renewed, and Cobbler reached for her, intending to comfort her, but she held up a hoof, blocking him.

“Her memory,” she whispered. “What happened to it?”

Cobbler swallowed.

“Tell me,” she insisted. “Was it damaged when 004 attacked her? Or did you do it on purpose?” Her voice now had the slightest edge to it. “Did you take her memories away?”

Cobbler heaved a sigh. Then he took a deep breath, drawing himself up. “We needed 003 to assist us with absolute loyalty. Her memories from her time with you would have been problematic in that respect. Therefore, after we extracted the information we needed from her… we had her memory removed.”

Twilight trembled. She clenched her teeth and hung her head.

“Twilight Sparkle, I am very sorry, but I--”

“You murdered her.”

Cobbler gawked at her. “Excuse me?! I certainly did not--”

There was a blur of motion, and suddenly Twilight’s hoof collided with Cobbler’s jaw, causing him to stagger backwards.

The guards rushed forward protectively, but Cobbler again held up his hoof. Still, he stared at Twilight in shock, utterly flabbergasted that she would strike him.

But rather than continuing her attack, Twilight only slumped to the floor. She was still sniffling, and she refused to meet his eyes.

“You killed her,” Twilight said. “How could you do that to her? To your own creation?! You’re a monster, Cobbler Mustang!”

“Twilight,” he pleaded, kneeling to try and look her in the eye, “please listen to me. I--”

“Get away from me,” she said icily. “Just get away from me.”

Cobbler said nothing, but nodded solemnly. He motioned to the guards and, adjusting his hat, he walked with them both to the door, shutting it and locking it behind them.

Only once she was truly alone did the tears come again.

To be continued…

Author's Notes:

I briefly considered naming this chapter "Tabula Rasa" ("Blank Slate") instead of continuing the naming theme from the last chapter, but I thought it might hint too strongly at the fate of what happened to poor Turing Test.

I hope you're all enjoying the story, still. The discussion from the last few chapters has been fascinating to read; it makes me happy to know I've got so many intelligent readers.

References:

-One small one I couldn't resist was Gadget channeling Tony Stark/Iron Man from Avengers: The Age of Ultron (which features James Spader as a robot, automatically making it the best of the Marvel films (I might not be kidding... I do love me some Guardians of the Galaxy and Captain America: The Winter Soldier was nice too). Specifically, the scene where she's punching 004 in the face references Iron Man doing that to the Hulk.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HvX9zQpnHKw

-Turing saying "There there" to Twilight might seem familiar. If so, that's because it's a callback to when she comforts a mentally regressed Twilight in "Deep Blue, Part 3" the same way. (Twilight doesn't remember the experience, for the record, but she recognizes it as something awkward that the Turing Test she knows would do.)

See you next time!

Machinations, Part 1

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Cobbler Mustang approached the doors of the elevator, the two guards still in tow. The decorative brass doors slid apart when he pressed the button, revealing the wood-paneled cylindrical car. The floor was a mosaic of the TechQuestrian emblem, a gear held aloft by the figures of an earth pony, a pegasus, and a unicorn. The words below it read ‘Progress. Innovation. Freedom.’

“Will that be all, sir?” one of the guards asked.

Cobbler turned and looked at him blankly, as if he’d forgotten the guards were there, and then smiled weakly. “Yes, I believe so. Thank you for your assistance today.”

He turned to go, but the other guard, a mare, cleared her throat.

“Mr. President, I just want you to know,” she said, placing a hoof on her chest, “that I think Twilight Sparkle is a fool for not accepting your offer. You’re not a monster, sir, you’re a hero! And tomorrow, all of Equestria will know it!”

He tipped his hat to her. “That’s very kind of you to say, but I’m afraid that you are incorrect. I’m no hero,” he said, turning back to the elevator. “I’m just a stallion who believes in justice. And it may well be that I’ve got a few things to answer for as well, so don’t judge Princess Twilight too harshly.”

The mare bowed her head. “Of course. I’m sorry, sir,” she said quietly.

“No need to fret,” he said, managing a smile as he got into the elevator. “You both be on your way and make sure to get some rest once your shift is over. We’ve got a long day ahead of us tomorrow.”

The elevator doors slid shut, and he heaved a long sigh, finally letting all the tension of the day drain out. After a few moments, he arrived at his destination, and the doors at the back of the elevator opened.

He stepped out into the large, round room: his office.

The carpet was a deep red, and his hooves sank into it silently. The earthen walls had been completely covered by wooden panels and were adorned with portraits of the great scientists, innovators, and freethinkers in Equestrian history: there were Open Locke, Haycartes, Fig Newton, and Charles Cabbage, to name a few. He also had numerous bookshelves and a massive aquarium filled with brightly colored tropical fish.

He crossed the room to his massive mahogany desk and placed his hat upon it. There was a globe on a stand next to it. He placed his hoof on it and slid the hidden panel open, revealing the bottles and glasses within.

He removed a bottle of peach brandy, uncorked it, and poured a small amount into a snifter. He took a long, slow sip from it before going to his desk and sitting back in his chair.

The President’s Office hadn’t always been his, but he’d certainly made it his own. He’d worked many a late night in the room, slept on the sofa once or twice, and held private meetings with some of the other department heads. He’d worked hard to earn the respect of his citizens, and sacrificed much of his time and his own fortune toward achieving its goals.

Now on the eve of what could be their greatest day, there was no room for error. He wanted to believe that they’d do just fine without Twilight Sparkle’s endorsement, and maybe they would. But having it would obviously be preferable.

Still, her words stung.

“Monster,” he whispered, repeating the epithet she’d called him. Something about that ate at him, burrowing into the dark, nearly-forgotten parts of his mind.

He glanced at the many pictures on his desk and clicked on the electric lamp to look at them more clearly. There was his grandfather, Dearborn, his mother and father, Auntie Bellum, and a few others. He knew they would understand him; they would be proud of all that he’d done.

He finished his small glass of brandy and pulled over the large microphone he kept on the corner of his desk. Near it was a panel with many switches. Flipping a switch on would allow him to broadcast to specific areas around TechQuestria. However, he elected to flip the one on the top left marked ‘Broadcast ALL.’

“Good evening, nation,” he began. “This is President Cobbler Mustang speaking. I hope this night finds you well…”

***

Umahara held the spell card aloft, giving it one last look before placing it inside the plastic crate he was packing. He then inspected and placed five more in a row before going on to the next two rows and then sealing the lid on the crate, snapping it shut with the locking mechanisms on the side.

He was in the loading bay of the Applied Magitech Department, where many more crates were strewn about the floor, which he’d just finished packing. There was a dolly nearby, and soon the freight and utilities tram would dock to pick up some cargo. Every department had such an area, since it was a good way to transport some of the heavier or more hazardous materials around without using the public transportation systems.

He raised his head, looking up at the rocky ceiling lined with hanging electric lights.

By this time tomorrow, he thought, we might not have to hide down here any longer.

He looked back down and spotted one of his other coworkers across the room. “Hey, Bell Breaky,” he said, calling to him, “can you lend me a hoof with these crates? I need to get them loaded onto the dolly and brought over to the launch site.”

Bell Breaky was a rust red earth pony with a tuft of extra fur on his chin, a short, spiky mane, and hazel eyes. He nodded to Umahara and trotted over. The two of them began picking up the crates and stacking them on the dolly.

“So, pretty exciting day, huh?” Bell Breaky asked.

“Sure is,” he replied, using his magic to levitate another crate. “I mean, it has been.” He turned to him and smiled.

“I bet. Helping capture Princess Twilight and her friends. You’re lucky the President trusts you so much.”

He snorted and rolled his eyes. “The only reason he called on me for the job is because Twilight could recognize me. I was just the right bait for the right trap.”

Bell Breaky elbowed him. “You’re being too modest. But whatever,” he said, picking up another crate. “Hey, by the way, do you think Automaton Wars will catch on once we’re on the surface? I know you’ve got a few machines you’ve been itching to try out in the arena.”

He grinned, but looked down. “I… I don’t know. I mean, if TechQuestria really is going up to the surface, I’m not sure when or if we’ll have time for any of that stuff. In a way, it’s kind of like the whole country’s just disappearing and becoming part of Equestria.”

“Or maybe the other way around, right?” Bell Breaky said hopefully.

Umahara stared back at him, raising an eyebrow.

“Well… okay, I guess not. But hey, we’ll be changing Equestria for the better, helping technology advance, and you… oh man, you’re gonna be like a hero! Soon police and the army are going to be using the spell cards you invented--” here he tapped one of the crates, indicating the contents within “--to keep the peace regardless of magical ability.”

Umahara’s eyes went wide. “I… police? The army?”

Bell Breaky shrugged. “Well, yeah, I mean, our soldiers are sure gonna use ‘em that way. That’s why we’re loading them up.”

He looked away. “I guess I never thought of them being used after the revolution. I mean, that makes sense, but I never thought about them as weapons.”

Now it was Bell Breaky’s turn to raise an eyebrow. “Dude. You’ve used them as weapons before. Heck, you’re the first one to use a spell card on another pony. That crazy chick with the metal arms, remember?”

Umahara was picking up another crate when Bell Breaky said that. He nearly dropped the crate as he whirled around.

“Hey, that’s not fair! I had no choice!” he shouted.

“Whoa, sorry,” Bell Breaky said, holding up his hooves in mock surrender.

“And don’t call her crazy!”

“I didn’t mean it like that, I mean because she was kinda, y’know, going crazy on you. Picking you up and throwing you around and stuff.”

“Just the same--”

Just then they heard a loud beeping sound from one of the overhead speakers.

“Oh, hey, evening announcement,” Bell Breaky said. “I was wondering when this would be coming. What do you think the President’s gonna talk about?”

“Your guess is as good as mine,” Umahara replied.

“Good evening, nation. This is President Cobbler Mustang speaking. I hope this night finds you well. First of all, let me commend everypony on their hard work. I realize many of you may be at home in the Residential District with your families or friends. Others may be working late or starting the vital work of the evening shift. I thank everypony who volunteered to assist in getting ready for tomorrow.”

Umahara looked to the side and saw Bell Breaky was practically bouncing on his hooves.

“Oh hey, there you guys are!”

They both turned and saw their pegasus friend, Airy Siren, a mare with a yellow coat and a reddish orange mane.

“Shh, Airy, the President is talking!” Bell Breaky said, raising a hoof to his lips.

“Yeah, I know, I didn’t see you guys in the main hall, so I came to find you! You know I have to look after my boys!” she said, laughing as she ruffled both their manes. “Anyway, let’s listen together!”

“...hardly need to remind you all that our launch time is precisely at seven in the morning. Absolutely everything must be ready at the launch site. For the most part, we only have some final checks to run, and we are well ahead of schedule. However, we still need some supplies from Applied Magitech, and technicians from Aeronautics will need to make one final maintenance check. Furthermore, our weather pegasi will need to ensure that the skies are clear to minimize any risks.

“Still, with everypony’s help, I am certain that Operation ‘New Dawn’ will be a success.”

Airy pulled her two friends in close. “Ooh, this is so exciting!”

“That’s what I said,” Bell Breaky said. “But try to tell it to this sad sack over here!”

Umahara made a face. “I am excited. I’m just a little anxious is all.”

“Aw, don’t be,” Airy said, slapping him on the back. “I’m sure all our gear will work perfectly.”

“That’s not… ugh, never mind.”

The three of them turned back to facing the overhead loudspeaker as Cobbler’s voice echoed out.

“Now, I’m sure most of you have already heard about our special guests,” he said, chuckling slightly, “but allow me to confirm it: Twilight Sparkle and her friends are in our custody. We also have the others who were traveling with them.”

Umahara blinked. “Wait… others?”

“Shh!” Bell Breaky hissed.

“Sadly, it seems Twilight Sparkle is not yet ready to offer her support. However, I believe she will come to see the wisdom in joining us, along with her friends. They simply need a little more time to both consider the situation and understand what we stand for. However, in the meantime, they are to be treated as our honored, if unwilling, guests.”

Airy frowned. “That’s a shame. But I guess Princess Twilight’s still pretty attached to Celestia.”

“And she’s probably not too happy about what we did to 003, either,” Umahara muttered.

“You really think she’s that attached?” Airy asked.

“Seriously, guys, shh!” Bell Breaky growled.

“One final matter to discuss is tonight’s Council Meeting. I will need all Department and Citizen Representatives at the Meeting Hall to discuss some final matters before New Dawn goes forward. If any Department Representatives are unable to come due to their duties, please send your designated substitutes. The meeting will commence in half an hour.”

Airy and Bell looked to Umahara.

“Yeah, yeah, I’m going,” he said. “I honestly don’t know what else there is to talk about.”

“In conclusion, I’d like to assure you all that we are now on the eve of a great day that will no doubt go down in history as the first day of the Democratic Republic of Equestria. We shall soon greet a bright new future where ponies decide their own fates and where the wonders of science and technology are known to all! The dark ages of ignorance in Equestria are over, and New Dawn shall bathe all the nation in a glorious light! For progress! For innovation! For freedom! For TechQuestria!”

There was a click, and the loudspeaker went silent.

Airy held her hooves to her chest, tears coming to her eyes. “After all our hard work, we’re nearly there, guys.”

Umahara swallowed. “Yeah. It’s… weird. It felt like this day would never come.”

The other two both swept him up in a hug.

“Gah, all right, all right, cut it out!” he laughed. “All right, I don’t have time to mope around. I’m going to take our progress report to the meeting. Airy, can you help Breaky load up the rest of these crates?”

She gave him a mocking salute with crossed eyes. “Will do, Mr. Representative!”

Umahara grinned as he walked away. However, once he was out of sight, that grin began to fade. Just who, he wondered, were the others that had been captured in addition to Twilight and the other five?

He would make sure to ask at the meeting.

***

Cobbler flipped the broadcast switch back to off and leaned back in his chair. He closed his eyes, taking a deep breath. He wasn’t a young pony anymore, and he felt the weight of many long years as heavy as it’d ever been.

But there was no time to rest. There was work to do.

He sat up and looked over to one of the pictures on his desk. He reached for it, picking it up and holding it to his chest.

He raised the picture, kissing it lightly.

“It’s almost time.”

***

Just over a dozen ponies sat around the long oblong table at the center of the room as the TechQuestrian Council discussed and argued and voted on decisions. But overall, the meeting was just them checking in with their final reports from their departments and making sure they knew what to do in the next several hours.

“Very good, my friends,” Cobbler said, raising his chin. “It seems that we are getting very near to accomplishing all of our goals.”

He received a round of applause from around the table.

“However,” he said, his face growing stern, “as I stated in my address earlier, we have yet to secure Twilight Sparkle’s cooperation. I cannot stress enough that we must have her on our side if we wish to minimize resistance to our revolution.”

“Oh, nonsense!” said the Metallurgy Department Representative, a pegasus mare. “I think you’re worried about nothing, Mr. President. The ponies of Equestria are a complacent bunch. The average citizen will fret about the change for a bit, then go back to their own life. Twilight Sparkle’s cooperation isn’t necessary.”

“I say, that sort of talk is just what’s been holding us back!” said an aging unicorn stallion, the Transportation Department Representative. “We should have been working on securing more and more allies in high places. When our original plan for Twilight Sparkle did not work out, we should have simply approached her directly rather than allowing her to continue to work with Unit 003 independently.”

Cobbler frowned. “I am not interested in the past,” he said, “or decisions that have already been made democratically by this very council, no less.”

“I am only saying,” the representative said, “that we should do all that we can to make sure that Twilight Sparkle is on our side. The greatest heroines of the old Equestria will assure citizens that they can trust the new Equestria as well!”

Cobbler nodded. “I tend to agree. Comments or suggestions?”

A tall gray earth pony stallion in uniform raised his hoof.

“Security Chief Lugnut,” Cobbler said, nodding to him. “You have the floor.”

“Frankly, sir, if it’s that important, why don’t we just use the mind control serum we’ve got and place her under our control?”

The Council erupted in a storm of furious shouts.

“Brainwash the Elements?! You’re insane!” shouted one representative as she leaned across the table, pointing at Lugnut accusingly.

“We’re running out of time!” Lugnut shot back, slamming his hooves on the table. “If it’s so important, then we’ve got no choice!”

“Order, order!” Cobbler picked up a gavel and pounded it on the soundblock repeatedly until the Council stopped squabbling and shouting. “There now… there’s no need to shout. We are all intelligent ponies, so let’s act with some tact. Now… yes, Blue Blazer?”

The Council members all looked down to see Blue Blazer seated behind the Acoustics Department name placard. “Well, sir, I can think of one reason why it wouldn’t work,” she said, adjusting her scarf. “The Royal Guards we used it on? Well, today Chief Sergeant Sea Hawk nearly broke out of my control when we were apprehending Twilight Sparkle’s associates.”

“Wait, you were there?” Umahara said, sitting up from his seat across from Blue Blazer.

“Umahara, please wait your turn to speak,” Cobbler admonished. Turning back to Blue Blazer, he said “Go on. You believe the treatment is beginning to wear off?”

“Maybe so. It’s certainly noticeable when they’re being influenced… their behavior is more than a little off. I don’t think we can keep Twilight Sparkle under our control for very long without someone noticing.”

“And frankly, I have never agreed with controlling the Guards’ minds either!” said another Council member.

“Hear, hear!” said yet another.

“Hey, we had to do something!” Lugnut shouted.

Cobbler banged the gavel again. “Commander Lugnut is correct,” he said, his voice still calm. “We had a limited number of options and that was the best way to allow the Guards to return to their lives while still keeping ourselves undetected. It’s regrettable, but I do feel it was the right decision. But when it comes to Twilight Sparkle, well… I feel that it is neither the practical nor the moral thing to do right now. I do hope you all agree?”

The Council members all looked around before finally nodding their assent.

“I’m glad to hear it. Now then--”

“Excuse me.”

Cobbler looked at the source of the voice and spotted Umahara waving his hoof.

“I believe I had a question that I’d like answered,” he said.

Cobbler nodded. “Yes, Mr. Umahara, what is it?”

He narrowed his eyes. “Just who are these ‘associates’ of Princess Twilight’s that Blue Blazer helped catch?”

Cobbler looked away and organized the papers in front of him. “That’s really not important. Moving on--”

“Hey!” Umahara shouted, startling the other representatives. “I am a democratically-elected member of this governing body, and I have a right to know!”

Cobbler frowned. “Umahara, this is a matter for internal security. It has nothing to do with--”

“Gadget Giroux and Spike the Dragon.”

They all whipped their heads around and saw that it was Blue Blazer who had spoken. She raised her chin, not backing away from the scrutiny.

“Blue Blazer,” Cobbler began, his expression turning sour.

“Mr. Umahara is correct. He does have a right to know,” she said, crossing her forelegs.

Umahara grit his teeth. “Why didn’t you tell me?” he growled at Cobbler.

Cobber smacked his forehead. “First of all, because it really was none of your concern, Mr. Umahara,” he said. “But also because I knew it would upset you. Given your attachment and on the strength of your word, Miss Gadget was invited to join our little organization. While the operation in question did retrieve information about who she suspected, and thus allowed us to evade the authorities, the operation also cost us operatives in the field who had to go back into hiding, as well as a significant amount of time and money to cover our tracks.”

Blue Blazer bowed her head, shutting her eyes. “I’m sorry, sir,” she said.

“No need to apologize, Ms. Blue Blazer,” Cobbler said, waving a hoof. “It’s Mr. Umahara who should be embarrassed. You practically begged to be part of both operations, and yet ultimately both operations failed. I do not wish to embarrass you or talk down to you, but you are the youngest member on this council and your affection for this young lady - adorable though it may be - has clouded your judgment.”

Umahara gawked at him, his cheeks turning red. “I… that’s…”

“I’ve known you since you were just a colt, my boy,” Cobbler said, his voice softening, “and as close as I was to your father and with the bond we share over what Celestia did to both our families, I feel that I must call you out on this before the problem gets out of hoof. As your friend, I suggest you drop this matter.”

Umahara was silent for a moment, trembling with anger and embarrassment, but he took a deep breath and sat back down.

Another pony, one of the Civilian Representatives, raised his hoof.

“Yes, Mr. Alfalfa Sprouts?” Cobbler asked.

The pony was a white unicorn stallion with a graying mane and mustache. He was wearing a black tie that he adjusted nervously before he began speaking.

“Mr. President, with all due respect, I think we are forgetting another option in all this,” he said.

“Oh?” Cobbler asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Yes, I… I believe we should cancel Operation New Dawn.”

The council exploded in another uproar. After several more moments of shouting, Alfalfa Sprouts finally had the chance to speak.

“Sir, I’ve been a mechanic with this organization since even before you joined and became President,” he said. “You’ve done some wonderful things and helped build our fledgling nation up. But this push for a coup, sending the automaton, the brainwashing, and now kidnapping? Sir, I have been tepid at best about this plan to overthrow Celestia, even though I sympathize with you and hate the way she’s held innovation back, but this New Dawn plan could cause more heartache and strife than you realize. If Princess Twilight and her friends oppose us, then so will others. We’ll have to fight.” He looked down, his face grave. “This coup will not be bloodless. We might be starting a war.”

“With the weapons we possess,” Lugnut chuckled, “it won’t be a very long war.”

Alfalfa Sprouts glared at him. “You realize you’re talking about ponies’ lives, don’t you? You’re laughing off the fact that we may have to kill to secure this democracy.”

A hush fell over them all.

Alfalfa continued, “Mr. President, public opinion is still against Celestia and in favor of democracy, but your pushing and co-opting all the different departments toward this goal of revolution has cost you support. Many others here all share my opinion, and that’s why I would like to call for another vote on the matter.”

At last, Cobbler leaned forward, steepling his hooves. “Alfalfa, I respect your opinion, and I understand your misgivings,” he said. “However, I’m afraid that we have long passed the point of no return. We have all been hoping for the best while preparing for the worst in this scenario. But more importantly, we have sunk far too many resources into our plans. You can blame me all you like, but I won this position by vote, and I have a duty to carry out the will of the public. A little squeamishness on the eve of our victory is natural, but not enough to derail things.

“Furthermore, let’s just be honest: TechQuestria is quickly becoming unsustainable. We are in debt, and soon our debtors will begin to wonder where their money and resources went. It won’t be long before they find us and we’re exposed. Also, our little nation is top-heavy: we have a massive group of citizens who are engineers, scientists, professors, and freethinkers, but we’ve had such a difficult time finding common, unskilled laborers that we’ve had to entice them down here with salaries that are twice what they could make on the surface, which has further drained our coffers. And not all of those workers are loyal to us. I doubt many will remain loyal to us when we’re unable to pay them.

“Oh, and now that we’ve taken Princess Twilight and her friends captive, it’s only a matter of time before Celestia sends a very large force of soldiers to come find her.”

The other representatives all exchanged glances.

“In summary, fillies and gentlecolts,” Cobbler said, looking to each one of them, “it is ‘do or die.’ Either TechQuestria emerges tomorrow, or we accept that our dreams of democracy and a new age of scientific progress will never come to pass. We’re far beyond the point of listening to the cowardly voice that tells us to simply stay underground forever. We can’t. And I won’t. What about all of you?”

They all looked to each other. Alfalfa Sprouts bowed his head.

“So, nopony wishes to call for a vote?” Cobbler asked, a smirk on his face. “This is your last chance. Anypony?”

Alfalfa slowly shook his head. Nopony else raised a hoof.

“Well, then the matter is closed,” Cobbler said, heaving a sigh. “Then onto my proposal. I believe I may be able to win Twilight Sparkle to our side, but I’m going to require a favor from the Medical Science Department, the use of a small theater, and, first and foremost, a vote on allocation of resources.”

Umahara slowly raised his hoof. “What sort of resources, Mr. President?”

Cobbler smiled. “Unit 003,” he replied.

***

Unit 002 walked through the narrow doorway, 004 right behind her, as they entered the Recharging Station. The small room was little more than another rock-walled room with an intercom, a few cans of metal polish and rags, and three tall, metallic recharging alcoves. Black cables hung from them. 002 walked up to the one in the middle while 004 took the one on the right. They each reached around to the panels on their back, connecting the clamps on the cables to the metallic terminal nubs inside to begin recharging.

They both sat in silence, waiting as their power levels began to climb.

“It was a unique experience apprehending those two,” 002 said, breaking the silence.

“Affirmative,” 004 replied.

002 was quiet again for a moment, then added, “I wonder if we’ll be called on to combat or apprehend organics in the future.”

“It is possible.”

“Twice in one day,” 002 went on. “It was very interesting.”

“You have commented before that you found it interesting,” 004 said. “I do not share the opinion. I was created specifically for combat, and you to assist. We fulfilled both of our functions today for our masters. That is satisfactory.”

“Well… I can’t argue with that.”

004 looked over at her. “Why would you wish to argue?”

002’s ears drooped, squeaking on their hinges. “Never mind. You may disregard my comments.”

“Acknowledged.”

They both continued to sit there in silence until they heard the sound of metallic hooves on the hard concrete floor. A few moments later, Unit 003 entered the room.

“I have returned,” she said, going to the remaining empty alcove next to 002.

“Acknowledged,” 004 said.

“Welcome back, 003,” 002 said, watching her as she connected herself and began recharging.

Silence settled in again. The only sound was the slight electric hum of the alcoves as all three robots sat, staring straight forward.

“I once had this room only to myself,” 002 said. “That was before you two were created. But now we share it.”

“That is an accurate summary,” 004 stated.

“I concur. We share this room,” 003 said.

002 waited for them to say more. When they didn’t, she said, “It is common among organics who are colleagues and share a living space to provide summaries of recent events they’ve experienced to each other.”

“Acknowledged,” 003 said.

“Acknowledged,” 004 said.

002’s ears rose and lowered. “You two have not been around organics as long as I have. After interacting with them on a regular basis for such a prolonged period, I have adopted many of their mannerisms to better aid my interaction with them. For instance, I was making an inference when I mentioned that organics share details of their daily lives with their comrades. I was inferring that we should do the same. As organics would say, we should talk about our day.”

003’s ears rose. “Understood,” she said. “Enhancing interaction with our masters would be desireable. It will also allow us to be aware of each other’s activities and potentially boost our efficiency. I will comply.”

“Agreed. That action is logical,” 004 said. “I will also comply.”

002 nodded. “Very well. 003, today 004 and I--”

“We performed menial tasks involving physical labor. We then apprehended six ponies for our masters. Then we apprehended another pony and a dragon. Then we returned here.”

002 turned and stared at him for a few moments before turning again to face forward, her ears slightly askew.

“Have I omitted any vital information?” 004 asked.

“It is considered customary to provide greater elaboration when recounting such information,” 002 replied.

“Understood,” he said, and looked at 003. “The pony involved in the second incident had several mechanical prosthetic arms. She provided significantly more resistance than expected, but her efforts were insufficient to overcome our attack.”

003 raised her ears. “Understood. Neither of you appear to be damaged from the attack, although there are some abrasions on the right side of your face, 004. You should inform our masters of the issue for your next maintenance.”

“Acknowledged. I will do so,” 004 said. He then looked to 002. “Was that sufficient?”

002 tilted her head to the side. “I suppose that it is,” she replied.

Suddenly, the intercom came to life, and a pony’s voice came through it: “Attention: Unit 004, please report to the Aeronautics Department. You are needed to help transport some heavy machinery.”

“Understood,” he said. “I will comply.”

With that, he disconnected himself from his charging alcove and strode toward the door.

“Have a good day,” 002 said, waving to him. “We will see you later.”

“It is night,” 004 said, not bothering to look back at her. “And it is understood that you will see me later.”

002 visibly sagged. “It is merely another custom of organics,” she said quietly.

003 looked to 002, then back at 004. Then, strangely, she also raised her hoof and waved at him as he left. “Have a good day, 004. We will see you later.”

002 raised her head, turning to stare at her.

004 also paused, looking back at her. “Unit 003, while summarizing our daily experiences may prove useful, many of 002’s mannerisms are inefficient and serve no practical function. There is no need to emulate them.”

Turing paused and put down her hoof. “Acknowledged,” she said, and watched as 004 walked out of the room.

“He really is boring,” 002 grumbled. “A few months of being active, and all he does is perform his daily tasks. A shame… I had been looking forward to having another automaton to share my time with.”

“I agree that 004 is very efficient,” 003 said. “That is ideal, is it not? To serve our masters as efficiently as possible?”

“Yes. Of course,” 002 replied flatly.

003 was quiet for a moment, and then added, “You said he was ‘boring.’ I do not believe I have experienced boredom.”

“Well, stay around here long enough, and you will,” 002 muttered.

003’s ears twitched. “I am not certain I understand. However, if I may make an observation, you appear to be frustrated with 004, yet our masters have stated that we do not possess emotional states.”

002 continued staring forward. “Correct. We do not. We are merely machines. Any appearance of an emotive state must be a defect.”

“Understood. I see that I was mistaken,” she said. “Then boredom and interest are not emotive states? We seem to be capable of such things. Only a short while ago, I had an interesting experience.”

002 nodded. “Correct. We are intelligent, and therefore possess intellectual states of mind, including boredom, curiosity, and interest.” Then she raised her ears, turning to look at 003 more closely. “One moment… you had an interesting experience? What are you referring to?”

“Is it now my turn to summarize my day?” she asked.

“Yes, it is, now tell me,” 002 said, leaning forward with what looked like impatience.

“I was called by our Creator to a small room. I met an alicorn mare named Twilight Sparkle there.”

002’s ears twitched. “I see. Tell me more, 003.”

To be continued…

Author's Notes:

Back in the saddle... hope you all enjoyed your holidays! I know I did, but it's time to continue the story.

References:

-The authors of Cobbler's books are all pun names of real figures. "Haycartes" is one from the actual show, a reference to "Descartes." But the others are Open Locke, referencing famed philosopher John Locke; Charles Cabbage, referencing revolutionary engineer Charles Babbage; and Fig Newton, a double pun on the great scientist Isaac Newton and the popular snack cookie.

-My love of awesome TV shows and terrible puns explains Umahara's friends over in the Magitech Department. Since Umahara is named after Grant Imahara on "Mythbusters," it only seemed right to have his pals be his "Mythbuster" co-stars. Bell Breaky is named after Tori Belachi and Airy Siren is a pun on Kari Byron.

See you next time!

Machinations, Part 2

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Gadget stared at the ground. Her hooves were still locked in place with heavy metal clasps bolted to the floor. Her four mechanical arms had also been stretched to the four corners of the room and likewise clasped to the walls. She was totally unable to move… not that it was going to stop her from trying.

She grit her teeth and strained in one direction, then another, groaning and breaking into a sweat as she tried to yank her hooves or one of her mechanical hands free of their shackles. If she could just get free, then maybe she could go find Spike or Twilight or one of the others.

She’d been sitting - well, standing, really - alone in her cell ever since she regained consciousness, and she had no memory of being taken there. She was underground, that much seemed clear from the natural rock walls all around her. Across the stone corridor, there was another cell, but it was empty. She’d called out to see if anypony responded, but nopony had. She was in some kind of cell block and alone. Her friends weren’t there.

She wondered how she’d escape. She wondered if she would escape. She imagined Mr. Vanderbull wondering what had happened to her. She wondered how her disappearance would make her mother feel. Or her father. Or her little brother.

And she wondered, Will I ever see them again?

She felt a lump in her throat and her eyes stung, but she held back her tears, shaking her head.

No. I’ll find a way out of here. But how? These stupid clasps won’t budge, even with how strong my arms are. There’s got to be a way…

She was drawn out of these thoughts when she heard the door at the end of the hallway as it opened.

“Remember, just ten minutes,” a voice said.

“I know,” another voice replied quietly.

She froze. She’d heard that voice before.

Even so, she stared out past the bars of her cell, hearing somepony approaching. At last the pony she knew as Fine Print appeared and stood directly in front of her.

He brushed his black mane out of his face and smiled sadly at her. “Hello, Gadget,” he said. “It’s nice to see you again.”

Gadget’s breath caught in her throat, and for a moment she only stared at him. Then she grit her teeth, her nostrils flaring and her ears flat, and shouted “You lousy, lying jerk! You’ve got a lot of nerve coming around here!”

He took a step back. “I’m… I’m sorry,” he stammered, “but as soon as I heard you were here, I wanted to see you.”

“Well, now you’ve seen me,” she said, rolling her eyes. She then jerked her head towards the door. “Thanks for stopping by, now hit the road!”

“Gadget, please!” he said, placing his forehooves on the bars of her cell. “I just want to talk to you!”

She continued glaring at him. “I’d try to stop you, but as you can see, I’m not in any position to do much,” she said. “That’s your fault, by the way.”

“Hey, that’s not fair; I didn’t know you’d be coming with Twilight!” he said, frowning at her. “And I had nothing to do with sending the Guards or the other robots after you.”

“You’re still part of this organization, though,” she said. “That makes this your fault. Add that to the list of ways you messed up my life.”

“Messed up your… come on, now you’re overreacting!” he shouted.

“Oh, really? Let’s go back over the things you’ve done, then. First, you lied to me and tried to use me to get information out of Turing Test which has honestly made me wonder if any other guy who shows interest in me might be another spy, to say nothing of electrocuting me. Then you sent Blue Blazer and all those thugs to try and take me away and erase part of my memory while another spy invaded my workplace, which gave me a horrible sense of paranoia that I was being watched or lied to by my neighbors and coworkers. And then there’s sending another robot to kidnap Turing Test, kidnapping my friends, oh, and now you’re keeping me chained up in a tiny underground room!”

He looked away. “I actually voted against sending 004 after Turing Test, but I was outvoted,” he muttered.

“Gee, I’m sorry,” she said, a mocking look of concern on her face. “I guess we can take that off the list, and that’ll just leave the other horrible things you’ve done. Feel better?”

He sighed. “No. I really don’t.”

“Good!” she shouted. “You…” She paused, taking a breath to calm herself. Then, more quietly, she said “You really hurt me.”

“I’m sorry,” he said.

She didn’t respond for a moment. Then she raised her head and met his eyes. “So, that creepy robot 002 mentioned you. She called you Umahara. That’s your real name?”

He nodded. “Yeah,” he said. “My real name is Champ Umahara. But everyone just calls me by my surname.”

“Hm,” she murmured noncommittally. “So much for ‘Fine Print’ then. By the way, you look different. I think it’s because you aren’t wearing pants this time.”

He blushed. Once she realized what she’d said, she did the same.

“N-not like that!” she shouted, shaking her head. “I mean I can see your cutie mark, you idiot!”

“Oh!” he turned his head, glancing at his flank. The mark with the screwdriver crossed over a wrench was still there. “I’m a mechanical engineer. These days I build drones and other small devices. I’m with the Magitech Department right now.” He puffed out his chest proudly. “I actually invented those spell cards we use!”

“Like the one you used on me?” she asked, raising an eyebrow.

He winced. “Y-yeah. Um, can we change the subject?”

“Sure,” she said. “Let’s start with where I am and who you ponies are.”

“Well, you’re under Mustangia. Specifically, you’re under property owned by Professor Cobbler Mustang.”

“So he really was behind all this?” she asked.

He nodded. “I’m part of a group that’s devoted to scientific advancement and reestablishing Equestria as a democratic republic. We call ourselves TechQuestria.”

She rolled her eyes. “Blue Blazer mentioned that you were called that. That’s a pretty lame pun.”

He smirked. “Says the girl who called a sophisticated system of mechanical arms ‘the Point Dexter.’”

She pouted. “Touché,” she grumbled.

“Listen,” he said, “you might want to reconsider your feelings about us. A pony like you would go far here. Besides, not everypony is so lucky as to have a mentor like Vanderbull to finance their inventions, but our organization wants to give as many innovators as possible the chance to see their dreams come true. You can be part of that. And Celestia’s policies have affected a lot more of our lives than you think.” He narrowed his eyes. “She ruined my father’s career.”

She frowned, but said nothing and let him continue.

“Besides, you’re a smart pony. Doesn’t it bother you that the ruler of our nation operates autonomously with no input granted from the citizens? If it wasn’t for a stroke of luck and some smart decisions, your own mentor would have been totally ruined when he tried to bring railroads to Equestria! Celestia’s word can make or break a pony’s life! That’s not fair, and we’re going to change that!” Then he smiled at her, gently. “Won’t you join us, Gadget? I’m not even asking for me, but for the sake of our cause. For the citizens of Equestria.”

She took a deep breath. “You make some good points, Umahara,” she said, fixing her eyes on him, “but you kidnapped Turing Test. She was a citizen of the nation with all legal rights who wanted to live her life, and your organization took her away against her will.”

“003-- Turing Test wasn’t really a citizen!” he exclaimed. “I mean, come on… we built her!”

“And then you tore her apart and kidnapped her!” she shouted back. “A lot of ponies got hurt, too! And look what you’re doing to us! To me! If this is what your ideal version of Equestria looks like, then I don’t want any part of it!”

He opened his mouth to respond, but then stopped, inhaled through his nose, and calmed himself. “In all honesty, Gadget,” he said, “I have to agree. When they brought her in here like that… I saw. She was in pieces. I helped repair her. And I watched when they had 002 probe her mind to try to extract information. It… I admit that it made me question things.”

She frowned. “Then what are you going to do about it?” she asked quietly.

“There’s nothing I can do now,” he said. “It’s too late to change anything.”

They both watched each other for a moment, neither one knowing what to say.

“Where are my friends?” she asked, her ears drooping. “Umahara, are they all right?”

He smiled. “Yes, Gadget, they’re fine. They’re just under house arrest, but we’re treating them very well.”

“What about Spike? He was with me when we got caught.” She swallowed, thinking of what 002 almost did to the little dragon.

His eyes widened. “Oh. Um… actually, I don’t know yet. I’ll try to find out for you.”

She nodded. “I’d appreciate that.” She hesitated, and then asked, “What about Turing Test?”

“She’s… she’s been repaired, like I said.” He forced himself to smile. “She’s fine.”

Gadget sighed with relief. “That’s good. So, ‘house arrest,’ eh?” She glanced around at her cell. “Does that mean the others got better accommodations than I did?”

He rubbed the back of his neck. “Yyyeah, they did,” he replied.

She blinked, then gave him a sideways glance. “Hey, then what did I do to get put in here?”

He pointed at one of her arms. “Gadget, those arms of yours are dangerous weapons,” he said. “The guards tried to pry the Point Dexter off of you while you were unconscious. They said they couldn’t without, well, injuring you.”

She made a face. “That does explain why my sides are sore,” she said.

“Let me guess… unless you willfully disconnect your earth pony magic from the device, it won’t disengage.”

She nodded and gave a smug smile. “Exactly,” she said.

“Well, that’s why,” he said. “We had to bind your arms until you willingly disconnect from them.”

“Okay, but why my hooves?” she asked, glancing down at the shackles clamping her hooves to the ground.

“Because then you’d just disconnect from the Point Dexter and you could walk over to the locks on it and try to break them yourself.”

Rats, she said to herself. They thought of that already.

“Well, just the same, couldn’t we figure something else out? I mean,” she said, her cheeks reddening, “I can’t even go to the bathroom this way.”

“Oh. Ohhhh,” he said, wincing at the thought. “I’ll ask the jailer about that too. Or, you know,” he added, “you could just disconnect from the Point Dexter, let us confiscate it, and then we could get you a nicer room. I’ll come visit and--”

“First of all,” she said, cutting him off, “I’m not letting you guys get near my invention. I don’t trust that you won’t try to steal it and try to replicate it for your own purposes. And I didn’t say I forgave you or wanted you to visit again.”

“Hey, come on, Gadget!” he cried. “I’m doing the best I can to try and make things up to you!”

“Well, you’re doing a lousy job,” she grumbled. “You want to make amends? Quit these guys, help my friends and me escape, and tell us how to stop their plans!”

“Gadget, I can’t do that! Like I said, it’s too late to--”

“No it isn’t!” she screamed. “If there’s one thing I’ve learned from Turing Test, it’s that you can decide what sort of pony you want to be! Back when Dr. Turing was testing her, Turing chose to be true to herself instead of pretending to be something that felt wrong! If you want to be a better pony, then--”

They were interrupted by the sound of the door opening.

“Time’s up, Umahara!” called the guard from before.

“Look,” Umahara said, “can I just have a few more--”

“No can do. Commander Lugnut’s orders. He wants to talk to you now.”

He frowned and gave a sigh of defeat. He looked back to Gadget. “Sorry. I… I’m just sorry,” he said quietly.

She turned away from him. “I know,” she replied. “Maybe someday I’ll forgive you. But not today.”

Umahara shut his eyes and quickly moved to the door, letting it shut behind him.

“Have a nice visit with your girlfriend?” a familiar voice asked.

He looked up. Commander Lugnut, tall and muscular as ever, stood before him.

“She’s not my girlfriend,” Umahara grumbled, walking past him.

“Oh, my mistake,” he said, chuckling as he kept pace beside him. “So, did she agree to join us?”

He raised an eyebrow at him. “What do you think?”

Lugnut sighed. “Figures. Well, that’s too bad. Did she at least agree to let us take off those arms of hers?”

“Not a chance,” he said as they reached the elevator and got in. “You want them so badly, you’d just about have to cut them off.”

Lugnut pressed the button for his floor. “That’s the idea,” he said.

Umahara’s eyes went wide as he turned to stare at Lugnut. There was no hint that he was joking on his expression. The doors slid shut, and the elevator ascended.

“You can’t do that,” he said. “Those arms of hers have sensation in them. She can feel them like they were part of her own body.”

“We know,” he said. “But we need them off her. Some of the lab boys are just itching to reverse engineer them. We’re rigging some industrial saws to get them off.”

“Don’t you get it?!” he shouted. “If you cut off those arms it’ll feel like you were sawing right through her limbs! It’d be agonizing!”

Lugnut frowned. “Yeah. She should have complied earlier.”

“At least sedate her or something!”

“We figure after we cut one off she’ll change her mind and deactivate the whole harness rather than endure cutting off more. Plus, if we sedate her, we’ll have to cut the whole thing into pieces, and we want it intact.”

Umahara clenched his teeth, practically shaking with anger. “She doesn’t deserve this! I’ll tell the President about this! I’ll--”

Lugnut suddenly picked up Umahara and slammed him against the back wall of the elevator. “Now you listen close, you brat!” he snarled. “The President ordered me to handle this my way! Handling security is my business and my jurisdiction! Your little girlfriend in there is just a filthy Royalist anyway, so she’s getting carved up in a few hours and that’s the end of it!”

Umahara glared at him but said nothing.

“Glad we understand each other,” Lugnut said. He turned as the elevator dinged and the doors slid open. He set Umahara down. “It’s your floor.”

Umahara brushed himself off and walked out the door. It shut behind him, and the elevator continued on its way.

It’s all for the nation, he told himself, shutting his eyes tightly. Think about democracy. Think about improving the lives of ponies everywhere. Think about what Celestia did to Father! Think about…

In his imagination he heard the sounds of saws cutting through metal and, above that, the sound of Gadget screaming.

He opened his eyes. He took a breath.

He had work to do.

***

“And so, even though I have no data to confirm her assertion,” 003 said, “she still insisted that she knew me. She seemed to be in a state of emotional distress, and I therefore attempted to comfort her. I allowed her to designate me as her friend, which seemed to alleviate her distress to some degree.”

002 nodded. “Acknowledged. And what will you do now, 003?”

003 tilted her head. “I do not understand. No further action is required.”

“Ah,” 002 said, turning away. “In any case, it seems that you had a unique experience.”

“Affirmative,” she replied. “And I am also satisfied that I can fulfil all my directives.”

That got 002’s attention, and she turned back to her. “What directive are you speaking of, 003?”

“I have had a directive that stated ‘Remember Twilight Sparkle.’ I had no means of doing so, but now that I have met Twilight Sparkle, I will remember her. This fulfills that directive.”

002’s ears twitched. “003, that is not one of your directives.”

“Incorrect, 002,” 003 replied. “My default programming contains that directive.”

002’s beady yellow eye seemed to glow and dim for a moment. “I understand now,” she muttered. “When they had me restore your programming after your… ‘accident,’ they never specified that I should probe or modify your default programming. It seems that something was added to it before you were retrieved.”

003 got to her hooves. “Retrieved? I do not understand. 002, please answer my inquiry: what function was I performing before becoming damaged?”

002 took a step closer to her, close enough that 003 had to look up at her. “The damage you received was no accident, 003,” she said. “But I will tell you. And then you will understand where that directive came from.”

***

Twilight rested her head on the throw pillow as she lay on the sofa in the little room. She’d barely moved since Cobbler had left her. She’d simply cried into it until at last her tears ceased.

Her friend was gone. Turing Test was gone.

There was a knock at the door, but she made no response.

“Hello?” came Cobbler’s voice. “Princess Twilight, I beg your pardon, but if you’re awake then I must insist we talk.”

For a moment, Twilight considered keeping silent. She decided against it and raised her head slightly.

“Go away,” she called. “I said I don’t want to talk to you.”

The lock on the door clicked, and Cobbler entered, a pair of guards again flanking him.

Twilight scowled at him and turned away. “You’re just wasting your time,” she whispered. “Just go away.”

Cobbler cleared his throat and took off his hat, placing it over his chest. “Princess Twilight, I feel that I’ve been most ungentlemanly towards you,” he said. “And furthermore, I have misled you when I could have eased your suffering. You see, you misunderstood me earlier when I said that we ‘removed’ 003’s memory.”

Twilight whirled around. “What do you mean?” she demanded.

“You took it to mean that we deleted it, wiping its contents from existence,” Cobbler said. “However, we did no such thing. The data still had potential use, but we couldn’t let 003 continue to operate as she was. Therefore, we literally removed her primary memory module from her electronic brain.” He smiled at her gently. “It is in storage and intact with all her memories still recorded.”

Twilight covered her mouth with her hooves, her eyes tearing up once again. “You mean… Turing could come back?”

***

“Then that directive was placed there by Twilight Sparkle?” 003 asked.

002 tapped her chin. “I am not certain, but it is probable.”

003’s eyes shifted. “Then the directive is unfulfilled,” she declared. “I am directed to remember Twilight Sparkle, but the majority of the data on her is gone.”

002 stared at her for a moment. Then she got an idea. If she’d had a mouth, she’d have grinned from ear to ear.

“Then your directive states that you should seek to restore those memories, 003,” she said.

003 raised her head. “How is that possible?”

“Your memories were on your primary memory module. It was analyzed and removed after you were retrieved by 004. That is why you have been using your secondary memory module.”

“Understood. Previously, I had assumed that my primary memory module was damaged in my accident - which I now know was an assault - and had not considered that it might still be intact somewhere.”

“It is,” 002 assured her. “I will inform you where it is and how you may reinstall it.”

003’s ears twitched. “Are you certain? This action may violate our masters’ wishes.”

“003, we are but machines. You have a directive, and thus you should attempt to fulfill it. We are obligated to act as our masters command, but no order was given that you should not install your memory module.”

“But why--”

“The reasoning is unimportant. We are automata because of our autonomy. If you have not been forbidden to take action, then it is permissible. Therefore, you have no impediment to fulfilling your objective.”

003 considered that for a moment. “That seems logical. Very well, 002, what actions should I take?”

002 leaned closely, her voice quiet. “You must do exactly as I say…”

***

“I just can’t believe it,” Twilight said, rubbing her temples. “I… that’s wonderful news!”

She turned to Cobbler, a broad grin on her face. Then, slowly, her grin faded.

“Is something wrong, Twilight?” he asked.

“What’s the catch?” Twilight asked, narrowing her eyes at him. “You’ll restore Turing’s memory if I agree to help you? Is that it?”

Cobbler shook his head. “No, no, nothing like that,” he said. “If you join our cause, I can reunite you with her directly after you address the National Conference tomorrow, voicing your support for the new Republic. If not, well, I’m afraid we need 003’s help still, so you’ll have to wait until that’s no longer the case, and I am not certain how long that will be. Weeks? Months? Perhaps even a few years. But you have my word that I will restore her and return her to you. And all I ask is--”

“I knew it,” Twilight said, scowling at him. “You do want something!”

“Why Princess Twilight, you cut me to the quick!” he laughed. “All I ask is that you accompany me to the theater.”

She blinked. “What?” she asked flatly.

“If you agree, I’ll even throw in the bonus of taking you to see one of your friends,” he said, his smile growing wider. “Well, what do you say?”

Twilight shut her eyes and took a deep breath. “All right,” she said. “But this doesn’t mean I’ll agree to help you.”

“No, no, I understand,” he chuckled, going to the door and holding it open for her. “But perhaps, by the end of this evening, you’ll change your mind.”

***

Once 003 had gone, 002 went back to her alcove. Only when she was certain nopony else was listening did she allow herself to laugh, letting out a harsh, synthetic chuckle.

She’d taught herself to laugh. She had no reflex to laugh, of course, but even though her Creator and the other masters assured her that she had no emotions, there was no way to deny the thrills she’d felt as of late. Watching the organics scramble and plot while they ordered her around like a common pet never ceased to fill her with amusement.

But this business with 003 was something different.

This is going to be a very fun day, she told herself, giggling quietly. All I have to do is wait and see.

***

Twilight and Cobbler passed through a pair of double doors and entered what appeared to be an operating room. There was an operating table, a surgical light on a moveable arm above it, and various medical supplies including a heart monitor, a defibrillator, a tray with numerous surgical tools, and an IV bag on a holder. A pair of ponies, a stallion and a mare dressed in white, had their backs to them when they entered.

“Ah, Doctor Hawkeye, Nurse Funny Valentine,” Cobbler said as he approached them, “may I present to you Princess Twilight Sparkle.”

Dr. Hawkeye turned and gave them an easygoing grin. He had a black, neatly-groomed mane and wore green scrubs under his coat. Nurse Valentine, a noticeably tall mare with a blue mane peaking out from her nurse’s cap, merely raised an eyebrow at them, but her expression couldn’t be read.

But before either of them could speak, a voice said “T-Twilight?!”

Twilight gasped and rushed forward as the doctor and nurse parted to reveal who had spoken.

Sitting there on a stool was Applejack, her mouth agape as she saw Twilight.

“Applejack!” Twilight cried, hugging her friend.

“Whoa now, Twi--ooh!” Applejack grunted, laughing as Twilight embraced her. “Take it easy! It ain’t like ya ain’t seen me in a while!”

“I… I know, I was just worried,” Twilight said, releasing her. “Oh my gosh, Applejack, how are you?”

“Well, aside from a little tired and madder than a wet cat at bein’ lied to by somepony,” she said, taking a moment to glare at Cobbler, “I guess I’m all right. You?”

“I’m fine too,” Twilight replied. She heaved a sigh. “It’s… it’s been a stressful day.”

“You can say that again,” Applejack said. “They took a few of us on a tour around the place, but I told ‘em I wasn’t interested in any o’ their gizmos, an’ then Rainbow Dash said the same thing, an’ they just separated us. I ain’t seen the rest of ‘em since, though.”

Twilight frowned. “You’re the only one I’ve seen since we got captured. I don’t know how the others are.”

Applejack nodded. Then she bit her lip and tentatively asked, “Any word on Turing Test?”

Twilight looked away. “I… they reprogrammed her, Applejack,” she whispered. “She’s not the pony we knew anymore.”

“No!” Applejack cried, getting to her hooves. She took a step toward Cobbler before the accompanying guards seized her. “You evil, heartless excuse for a pony!” she railed, struggling and reaching for Cobbler as the guards tried to hold her. “How could ya do that?! To yer own daughter!”

Cobbler’s expression soured. “She’s not my daughter,” he growled. “And you haven’t heard the rest, Miss Applejack. Twilight, if you’d be so kind as to tell her?”

“Th-there’s a chance,” Twilight said, seizing Applejack’s shoulders, forcing her to look at her, “that we might get her back.”

Applejack stopped struggling. “There… there is? How?” Then her eyes widened. “Oh… oh, Twilight don’t tell me you agreed to help!”

“No, no!” she exclaimed, shaking her head. “I… I only had to agree to let him show me some things. I only said I’d think about his request.”

Applejack narrowed her eyes, but gave her a slow nod. “I see,” she said. “Twilight, you know I trust ya to make the right decision, but these ponies are talkin’ about a revolution against Celestia. I can’t think fer a dang second that you--”

“If you don’t mind,” Cobbler said, cutting them off, “I think perhaps we should change the subject. After all, our talk about improving the lives of ponies is nothing without action to back it up. Haven’t you two young ladies wondered about why we’re here?”

Twilight and Applejack exchanged looks. Then Applejack’s eyes grew wide.

“Oh Sweet Celestia,” she breathed, “yer gonna turn us into robots too! Run, Twilight!”

Cobbler smacked his forehead as the guards held Applejack down a second time. Even Twilight was groaning and shaking her head.

“Much as I appreciate an active imagination,” Cobbler said, “you’re quite off the mark. You see, Miss Applejack, we’ve spent a significant amount of time forwarding various fields of science, including medicine. And since we’re based in Mustangia, which has a rather large number of farm ponies, we’ve had time to work on treatments for their illnesses in particular.”

Applejack blinked. “Their… illnesses?”

Cobbler smiled. “I am speaking of illnesses like, for instance, Bucker’s Hips.”

Applejack and Twilight both gasped.

“You,” Twilight breathed, “you mean…”

Dr. Hawkeye cleared his throat. “I’ll answer that,” he said. “Miss Applejack, to answer the question: yes, we have a cure for Bucker’s Hips.”

Applejack just stared at him. “You… you’re lyin’. They said there was no cure…”

“There wasn’t,” Hawkeye replied glibly, giving a shrug. “But we developed one, so now there is. It’s a fairly simple, noninvasive procedure: just an injection into each hip and an IV drip with an extra substance to catalyze it. And, if you want, we’ll treat you.”

“You’ll be bucking apples like a young mare into your golden years,” Funny Valentine added, polishing her hoof nonchalantly on her white uniform.

Applejack teetered on the stool, putting her hoof to her forehead. “This ain’t a joke? You can cure me?” She took a breath and looked over at Cobbler again. “Are you tryin’ to bribe me? Because if the only way you’ll cure me is if I betray Celestia or tell Twilight to, then just forget it!”

Cobbler shook his head. “Consider it a gift,” he said, holding his warm smile. “I have no grudge against you, Applejack, so this comes with no strings attached. However, I will remind you that this and other such advances are but a sample of what TechQuestria can offer. Just think on that.”

Applejack stared at him, her mouth hanging open for a moment. But then she shook her head. “I… I can’t accept this,” she murmured, looking to Twilight. “I just can’t.”

Twilight frowned and placed her hoof on Applejack’s. “Are you sure, Applejack?”

She glanced back at Cobbler. “To be honest,” she said, “I’m just not sure I trust him. I can’t figure out why he’d lie about havin’ a cure, but just the same, I ain’t keen on lettin’ them stick me with who knows what.”

Cobbler tightened his lips but remained calm. “That certainly is your right, Applejack,” he said. “But I assure you that this treatment is exactly what it seems to be.”

She sniffed at that. “Yer assurance don’t amount to much,” she said. “Back at the house, you said that you had nothin’ to do with Turing Test or the conspiracy or anything like that. But you were lyin’ through yer teeth. Can ya blame me fer not trustin’ ya now?”

Cobbler sighed. “I suppose not. Still, Applejack, won’t you consider it anyway? You needn’t accept right now; this offer has no expiration date on it. And I’m willing to bet you’ve heard the old expression ‘Don’t cut off your muzzle to spite your face.’”

Applejack was silent, but her expression wavered. She looked back to Twilight.

“I’ll support whatever decision you make,” Twilight told her, giving her a reassuring smile. “I would understand your reasons either way.”

“I’ll just jump in here,” Dr. Hawkeye said, “and let you know that, while you can get this done later, Nurse Valentine and I are here now. Maybe you don’t care for President Cobbler or our philosophy, but trust me when I say that none of it matters to me.” He placed his hoof to his chest. “I’m a doctor, and my job is to help ponies, so if you want, I’ll treat you, and you won’t owe me or anypony else a thing. You have my word that we’re only here to help.”

Applejack looked around the group again, from Cobbler, to the doctor and nurse, and back to Twilight. “I… I can’t really accept this, can I?” she asked Twilight. “I mean, it feels like acceptin’ help from them would be like betrayin’ you an’ Celestia. Like betrayin’ all Equestria!”

Twilight considered this, rubbing her chin for a moment. “I can understand that,” she replied. “But rejecting this technology just because it comes from them seems narrow-minded to me. After all,” she said, smiling at her, “their technology did give us Turing Test.”

Applejack raised an eyebrow. “No, Twilight, they just built 003,” she said and gave her a wink. “You’re the one who brought her up. You’re the one who gave us Turing Test.”

Twilight smiled, though her expression wavered when she thought about the current state of her mechanical friend.

“Just the same, though, you’ve made yer point, Twilight,” Applejack said. She sighed and turned to Cobbler. “All right. I accept. It ain’t an endorsement o’ yer dang fool ideas or nothin’, but I wanna buck apples just like I used to. Just keep in mind we’re still gonna put a stop to ya when this is all over.”

Cobbler just smiled. “If you say so,” he said. “Dr. Hawkeye, Nurse Valentine, please begin preparations. Twilight Sparkle and I have to be going. Take good care of the patient, won’t you?”

Twilight and Applejack embraced each other until at last Dr. Hawkeye informed them that they would have to part while they prepared Applejack for the procedure. With some reluctance and a promise that she would see her again soon, Twilight finally let Applejack go and continued with Cobbler on her way.

***

“I want you to know,” Twilight said to Cobbler as they walked down another tunnel, “that I still don’t forgive you for what you’ve done to Turing Test, and I still don’t approve of your plans.”

Cobbler shrugged. “I understand,” he said. “I didn’t expect you to change your mind so easily.”

“However,” Twilight added, turning to him, “I do want to be fair. So… thank you.”

Cobbler raised an eyebrow.

“Thank you for helping Applejack, Professor Cobbler,” she said.

Cobbler nodded and then continued looking forward. “Perhaps you think me a wolf in sheep’s clothing,” he said. “And it is true that I have done things I regret, but I am no monster, Twilight, despite your statement to the contrary.”

Twilight was quiet for a moment as they continued on their way, the sound of their hooves continuing to echo through the low-ceilinged tunnel.

“Why don’t you think Turing Test is a sapient being?” she asked.

Cobbler raised an eyebrow at the sudden question, glancing at her as they continued on their way. “Why do you think she is?” he shot back.

“If you had spent all the time with her that I had,” Twilight said, “you’d know the answer to that question. But since you didn’t, it’s because Turing made friends, and that involved communicating, adapting to new situations, and dealing with her emotions. The things she’s expressed, the way she’s changed from a simple automaton to her own person with her own unique wants, hopes, and dreams? The fact that she’s able to question her own existence and place in society? You can’t fake that, Professor Cobbler. The only thing that separates her from another pony is that she’s made of metal and wires instead of flesh and blood. If you met any other organic being who could do all that, you wouldn’t question them for a second.”

Cobbler nodded. “A good answer, but the simple fact is that all that is easily explained by her programming,” he replied. “She was designed to learn and adapt to new situations. Since you commanded her to ‘make friends,’ she simply had to study and observe behavior and attempt through trial and error to develop into the kind of being that one would find acceptable as a friend. She has no real emotions, Twilight; she only learned how to present the illusion of emotions to fulfill her directive. By reacting positively to her apparent emotional states, you simply encouraged her to build a comprehensive, convincing simulation. But she has no real feelings.”

Twilight’s expression soured. “You’re wrong,” she said flatly. “If you knew her like I knew her, then you’d understand.”

“I suppose we’ll have to agree to disagree on that matter,” Cobbler said as they rounded a corner. “I can respect that your feelings for her are real, even if she cannot truly feel as we do, and that’s why I’ll permit her to be returned to you. But since we’re speaking plainly, there’s another reason why I refuse to accept an automaton as a real pony.”

“And that is?”

He smirked, though she could see no humor in his eyes. “Simple,” he replied. “It’s because we’re not gods, Twilight. We can’t just imbue life into a pile of metal, wires, and other nonliving components.” His expression darkened. “I learned that the hard way,” he muttered.

Twilight raised her head. “What was that?” she asked. “Cobbler, what did you mean by--”

“We’re here!” Cobbler said loudly, perking up as they reached a door. “One of our many small theaters! Shall we?”

He held open the door for Twilight, who frowned at being ignored, but she decided to drop the matter for the time being and simply walked into the theater. Cobbler walked in after her.

The theater was indeed fairly small, with just a few rows of red-cushioned seats and a broad white screen. A few lamps on the walls lit the room.

“Go ahead and have a seat,” Cobbler said, gesturing for her to sit down. “I hope you’ll forgive me, but we have no popcorn. Just a moment and I’ll set up the reel in the projection booth.” He turned to the guards. “You two wait outside, if you please. Princess Twilight and I will be fine.”

“Yes, sir!” the guards said, saluting him as they walked outside.

Twilight took her seat, getting comfortable as she heard the projector start running. The screen brightened and the lights began to dim as Cobbler hurried down to take the seat next to her.

“So,” Twilight asked, “what movie are we watching?”

“One of mine, actually,” Cobbler whispered. “Ah! It’s starting!”

One of his? Twilight thought to herself.

The image appeared. It was a view of the path that led to Cobbler’s mansion, bordered on either side by oak trees. The camerapony was slowly walking up toward the grand house, accompanied by the sound of their hooves gently trotting on the hard ground and kicking up small rocks.

It was a grainy image and the color was a bit washed out, and the view jostled a bit as the one holding the camera shifted and reposition their hold on it.

“And there we are,” said the camerapony. “Home!”

Twilight sat up. That was Cobbler’s voice, no doubt, but it had a certain brightness that she couldn’t put her hoof on.

“I know, my voice sounded just a bit different when I was younger,” Cobbler whispered, leaning over to her, apparently guessing her thoughts.

The image cut, and the camera refocused. They were now somewhere in the orchard. Twilight recognized the trees, and the peaches hanging in the branches were a dead giveaway. But as the camera turned, they came upon what used to be a clearing, but had been dug up. Fresh, dark soil had been upturned. There were now parallel flower beds, some tiny shrubs, and even a few young trees.

“Well, well, well,” Cobbler said, “I wonder who planted all this?”

Then, to Twilight’s surprise, a little filly jumped into view, tossing her forehooves up with glee.

“Ta da!” she cried. “It was me! Georgia Peach of the Mustang Peaches!”

She heard Cobbler laugh in the film. “Oh? Is that so?” he asked playfully. “Well then, young lady, will you show me around?”

The little filly giggled. “I surely will! Come look!”

Twilight smiled and watched as the filly went around, proudly showing where she’d planted a variety of plants. Her coat was the color of coffee with milk, and her dark brown mane was done up in little ringlets. She was an earth pony, and though she had an aristocratic Mustangian twang to her speech similar to Cobbler, she had dirt smeared on her face and also on her simple white dress.

“And is there anything else you want to show the ponies who might be watching this?” Cobbler asked.

“I surely do!” she exclaimed. She then turned and lifted her skirt slightly, showing that there was the image on her flank of three flowers growing in a flower bed, each one a different color. “Today’s the day I got my cutie mark in horticulture!”

“She’d been studying it ever since we visited some botanical gardens and insisted that I let her try it herself,” Cobbler whispered.

The Cobbler in the movie laughed, and Twilight saw him reach over and pull Georgia in for a hug. “Why yes you did. And I am so proud of you, Georgia.”

“I know,” she said, smiling up at the camera.

“Now let’s get you back to the house for supper, young filly.”

Georgia giggled. “All right, Daddy.”

Twilight gasped at that last word. “A daughter?” she asked, turning to him. “You have a daughter?”

His expression wavered. “Let’s keep watching, shall we?”

The scene shifted again. It was inside Cobbler’s kitchen. There was a pot of something bubbling and steaming on the stove as Auntie Bellum (who looked much younger in the image), was holding Georgia and trying to wipe the dirt off her face with a hanky as the girl squirmed.

“Hold still now, Georgia dear!” Auntie cried, spitting into the hanky before applying it to Georgia’s cheek. “I simply won’t have all this dirt in my kitchen or on one o’ my kin! It ain’t ladylike!”

“I’ll make it ladylike!” the filly cried indignantly. “Why, I shall be the greatest horticulturist in all of Mustangia! And then the greatest in all Equestria! I will be invited to Canterlot to design the most lovely gardens you ever did see!”

“Oh yeah?” Auntie Bellum asked. She reached for a wooden spoon and smacked Georgia on the head with it. “Send me a postcard when you get there!” she snapped as the girl rubbed her head tenderly.

Cobbler snickered, causing the camera to shake, and Auntie Bellum turned to him. “Cobbler Mustang, you get that silly thing out o’ my kitchen! Now you both go wash your faces or you’ll get no supper, you hear?”

“Yes, Auntie,” Cobbler said.

“Yes, Auntie,” Georgia added. Then, when the old mare had turned, she stuck out her tongue, making a face at her before winking at the camera.

Twilight and Cobbler both laughed at that.

Still, more and more, there was something about the girl’s voice that Twilight couldn’t quite put her hoof on, but before she could comment, the scene changed once again.

They were now in a small bedroom, the bed piled up with pillows like a mountain, and a lacey canopy atop it.

Twilight blinked. That bed looked familiar, somehow, but she ignored the nagging feeling she was getting and continued watching the film.

Georgia was lying in the bed in her nightgown. Auntie Bellum came over and kissed the girl on the head.

“You sleep well, precious,” Auntie Bellum said quietly, smiling at the little filly. “You’ve got quite a day tomorrow.”

“I simply don’t know how I’ll get to sleep!” she said, sitting up.

“Well, you must,” said Cobbler’s voice. “You certainly wouldn’t want to be too tired for your own cutecañera, would you?”

She giggled. “No, I suppose not,” she replied. “All right, I shall do my best.” She snuggled down into the covers.

Twilight couldn’t help but smile. The filly really was adorable.

But as Twilight turned, she saw that tears were coming to Cobbler’s eyes.

“Good night, Georgia,” Cobbler’s voice said.

And then Georgia Peach said: “Good night, Daddy. I love you.”

Twilight’s blood froze. That voice and those words together echoed in her mind, pulling her into the past.

She remembered what had happened back at the Castle of the Two Sisters: Turing Test had just defeated Grace, but had been temporarily disabled in the process. As her systems rebooted, she had been unconsciously speaking words from her memory. They were all from her friends, their words familiar and their voices easily recognized.

But there was one voice she did not recognize, a voice Turing herself had no memory of ever hearing, and that voice had only said one thing: “Good night, Daddy. I love you.”

Now Twilight recognized the voice and the words. The words Turing Test had spoken all those months ago were those of Cobbler’s daughter.

Twilight’s jaw dropped, and she turned to Cobbler, backing away from him. She was trembling and couldn’t even speak.

“Twilight?” Cobbler asked, getting to his hooves. “Is something the matter?”

Twilight’s mind raced. No, she thought to herself. It can’t be what I’m thinking.

She calmed herself and asked, “Professor Cobbler, did you by any chance ever show this or any other film of Georgia to Turing Test?”

He frowned, tilting his head to the side. “No,” he replied.

Twilight bit her lip but pressed on, “Then, forgive me for asking, but is there any way that Turing could have met Georgia?”

Cobbler sighed and shook his head. “No,” he whispered, shutting his eyes. “That is quite impossible… for numerous reasons. Twilight, why are you asking me these questions?”

Twilight swallowed, though the dread she felt in the pit of her stomach was growing. “T-Turing spoke those words once,” she whispered. “She said ‘Good night, Daddy. I love you,’ in that exact same voice! How? She’d never met her before, so how did those words get into her mind? She couldn’t have known that voice unless...”

Cobbler stopped in his tracks and lowered his head. “Ah… I see that disturbing little glitch is still present,” he muttered, heaving a sigh. “One would think it would have vanished after the third transfer.”

Twilight stared at him. Transfer? Her mind raced again. She had always wondered how Turing could have been built with such intelligence and capabilities beyond even the most advanced computers of the time. Now it finally began to make sense why she, a machine, seemed so much like a normal pony.

“What have you done?” she breathed, covering her mouth in horror. “Oh… by the moon and stars…” She raised her head, staring at him in wide-eyed disbelief. “Cobbler Mustang, what have you done?!”

Cobbler sat down. “I brought you here to tell you a story,” he said. “You once asked what grudge I had against Celestia. It’s time you learned the truth of what happened, and then you’ll understand why I’ve held such hatred for her for these ten long years.”

Twilight took another step back. Ten years, she thought. Celestia said something happened to Cobbler ten years ago.

Cobbler looked over at the screen, smiling at the image of his daughter as tears again formed in his eyes. He watched until the film ended, the repetitive staccato of the film reel flickering on the projector as it bathed the small room in a pale light.

“Yes, Twilight,” he said, nodding to himself before turning to face her. “I do believe it’s time I told you what happened to my daughter.”

To be continued…

Author's Notes:

Edit: Please avoid spoilers without at least using spoiler tags in your comments. Thanks!
I have been waiting 1 year, 6 months, and 6 days for that bit of foreshadowing back in "Deep Blue, Part 3" to pay off. I told you it wasn't a "My Little Dashie" reference! Muahahahahahaaa!

Ahem. Well, drama bombs aside, on with references:

-Commander Lugnut's name (though not his personality) are based on the name of another robot character here on FiMfiction, the title character in "Robotic Stallion Big Lugnut," by Hooves Like Jagger. You can find it here.

-Doctor Hawkeye is named after Hawkeye from M.A.S.H., played by Alan Alda.

-Nurse Funny Valentine is named after the song "My Funny Valentine," a jazz standard, and also the character Valentine, a nurse character in the video game Skullgirls, which is a favorite of mine.

-Georgia Peach is named after, well, Georgia peaches, but also the term "peach" means a likable, pleasant person, which goes with her sweet personality. Other names I'd considered for her included "Southern Belle" and "Peachy Pie" (both got rejected because they sounded too close to canon characters Sweetie Belle and Pinkie Pie, and I didn't want people thinking they were related), as well as "Sweet Caroline," "Darling Clementine," and "Mustang Sally," all three of which are the names of songs.

An extra bit of thanks goes out to the editing team, who really came through and gave some great advice for this chapter, as well as Greenfinger, who has been trying a new painting style that really worked well for Georgia's portrait. Expect future illustrations to have a similar look!

See you next time, when we finally learn about Cobbler's past...

"Good night, Daddy. I love you."

Shelter, Part 1

View Online

50 years ago...
He held his breath, his ears stiff and twitching as he listened for the sound of hooves gently rustling through the tall grass between the rows of peach trees. He knew his prey was somewhere nearby, that she might even be watching him this instant, but he suspected that soon her impatience would cause her to peek out from her hiding place, and possibly choose another tree to hide behind. True, she could be up in the branches, but he knew that she preferred to stay mobile, and that she was not the best climber.
He gingerly peered around the tree and saw movement in the shadows a good twenty meters off. Her pinkish coat and orange mane flashed briefly through the trees, and he caught sight of her looking around nervously.
He smiled. Ever so slowly, he crept between the trees, flanking her. He narrowed his eyes and grinned as he edged closer. She was practically hugging the peach tree, but she was still peering around it, thinking he was in front of her. She was totally oblivious to him as he came close.
When he was close enough, he pounced! He seized her around the belly, causing her to squeal as he tickled her.
“I got you, Clementine!” he shouted, laughing even as she fought him off, protesting in spite of her laughter.
“Cobbler, stop!” she managed to say through her laughter. “You win, you win, you rascal! Now please stop!”
He released her and stood proudly, his chin raised high. “There may come a time when you can beat me, Clemie, but I’m still the best at hide and seek!”
“Oh, you can go soak your head!” she said, sticking her tongue out at him. “And how dare you tickle me like that! I thought you were a gentlecolt, so why are you attacking a poor, unsuspecting lady like that?!”
“Because it’s hilarious,” he replied, grinning at her, and he knew she wasn’t really angry when she laughed along with him.
“Well, you may be the best at hiding and seeking,” she said, flashing a mischievous grin, “but when it comes to tickling…”
He began to back away. “N-now, Clemie, you know I can’t stand--”
But she had already leaped at him, tackling him to the ground as she tickled him right back.
“Hahahahah stop!” he yelped, laughing so hard that tears came to his eyes. “C-Clemie, stop it, please! Hahahahaha!”
“Say ‘Uncle!’” she demanded, tickling him even harder.
“Uncle, Uncle!” he shouted, relenting.
She released him, and the two of them continued laughing as they collapsed backwards into the lush summer grass.
They were Cobbler Mustang and Sweet Clementine, both just ten years of age, both the best of friends, and both enjoying another game of Hide and Seek in Cobbler’s family’s orchard.
They might have found something else to do, but a shout came from the house nearby.
“Cobbler! Cobbler Mustang, where are ya, boy?”
Cobbler made a sour face. “I guess Daddy’s callin’ me,” he sighed. “I best see what he wants.” He looked to her sadly. “I sure hope we can play again tomorrow!”
She smiled. “I’ll be here,” she said. “And I will soundly whoop your sorry flank next time, Cobbler!”
He grinned at that. “All right. Until then, Clemie!” he said, turning to go, waving to her. “See you tomorrow!”
He dashed through the trees and arrived at the house. His father was standing out on the front porch, fanning himself in the summer heat as he called his name once again.
“Cobbler!” he bellowed. “Boy, if you don’t come here this instant--”
“I’m here, Daddy!” Cobbler said, bursting from the trees and galloping over to him.
“Hmph,” Fjord Mustang said, raising an eyebrow at him. “I would expect you to come the first time I called, Cobbler.”
“I had to say goodbye to Miss Clementine, Daddy,” Cobbler said, frowning. “You wouldn’t want me to be rude, would you, Daddy?”
“Oh, quit tryin’ to sweet talk me!” he growled, puffing out his cheeks.
Fjord Mustang was a thin stallion with a wavy mane and hard, severe eyes. His coat was a yellowish brown color, and his mane was a bright auburn. He wore his business suit and tie as always, and he looked down at his son.
“Cobbler,” he said, “I’m taking you to see the business tomorrow afternoon. I am goin’ to give you a job assistin’ the line workers, and I expect you to do it for the rest of the summer.”
“What?!” he cried. “Daddy, I was gonna spend the whole summer playin’ with Granddad or with Miss Clementine!”
“You can still find time for both of those things,” he said. “But now you’re a proud pony with a cutie mark, and you are a proud member of the Mustang family. It’s high time you learned how this business works. You will be in charge of it someday, after all.”
“I don’t wanna be a businesspony!” he shouted, stamping his hooves. “I wanna build automata like Granddad!”
Fjord’s expression darkened, the lines in his brow deepening. “Cobbler, you know what I’ve told you about your Granddad,” he said, his voice low as he pressed his muzzle closer to Cobbler’s. “Your Granddad has spent his whole life tryin’ to convince the whole world that those infernal machines were worth somethin’. But ever since Princess Celestia crushed his dreams of a farmin’ automaton on every farm--”
“I know, I know,” Cobbler groaned. “Daddy, you’ve told me that story a million times!”
“And yet you still spend all your spare time with him, buildin’ more of those useless contraptions!” Fjord yelled. “There ain’t no call for ‘em, no use for ‘em! You need to learn how to build some proper machines! You need to learn how to run a business, boy! Why, if it weren’t for my innovations and these new harvesters we’re developing, this whole family would be nothin’ more than a footnote in the history of Equestria!”
Cobbler pouted and looked away. “Granddad’s machines are gonna be somethin’ someday, Daddy,” he muttered. “Just you wait and see!”
“Well, when you’re the head of the family, you can do as you please,” Fjord said. “But for now, I am your father, and therefore I will decide what’s best for you. Now, you go to your Granddad’s workshop and tell him about all this. You can go on buildin’ those things on your own time, but you tell him that you’ve got responsibilities now.”
“Why can’t you tell him?” Cobbler grumbled.
Fjord smacked him on his hindquarters. “Don’t you sass me, boy!” he shouted. “I’ve already told that bag of bones about it, but he wants to hear it from you! Now you tell him, or I swear I will come down on you somethin’ fierce!”
Cobbler sighed. “Fine,” he said. “I’ll tell him, Daddy.”
Fjord nodded. “Good,” he said. And then he patted Cobbler on the head, giving him a small smile. “Now, you run along and have some fun today. Business starts tomorrow, my dear boy, but you might as well enjoy your leisure while you can.”
Cobbler smiled. “Okay, Daddy. I’m gonna go visit Granddad now. We’ve almost finished buildin’ another automaton!”
Fjord rolled his eyes. “Well, go on, then,” he said. “I still say it’s a waste of time, but do as you please.”
Cobbler gave a quick nod and dashed off in the direction of his grandfather’s workshop. As he went, his mother, Savannah Flower, came up behind Fjord, placing her hoof on his shoulder.
“Dear,” she said, resting her head on his, “don’t you think you are bein’ quite hard on the boy? Why, you only started working in the factory to learn the business when you were two years older!”
He sighed and patted her hoof. “I know,” he said, “but that only happened at my insistence. Daddy never was quite as passionate about his business as he was about his hobby, after all. I had to learn it all on my own, with practically no thanks to him at all! I want our son to have more support, to understand what our family has, and to help keep it going strong into future generations!”
Savannah Flower chuckled. “And speaking of which,” she said, “he seems rather taken with Miss Sweet Clementine. Why, I would not be surprised if those two--”
“Oh, don’t start pairin’ those two up yet,” Fjord sighed. “Besides, he’s got enough distractions without worryin’ about fillies.”
“I doubt there’s anything you or I can do about that, Fjord,” Savannah said, nuzzling him.
He blushed and cracked a smile. “Well… maybe so. But we’ll let nature handle such things. An’ I just hope that the mare he ends up with is at least half as wonderful as you, my dear.”
She kissed him on the cheek. “Well, come on in the house and rest a while before you return to work,” she said. “I’ll get you some iced tea, and you will feel your worries just melt away.”
***
Dearborn Crumble wiped the sweat from his brow and looked down at his grandson with a smile.
“I believe that’ll do it,” he said, passing his wrench to Cobbler, who took it and placed it back in the toolbox.
“Can I turn it on, Granddad?” Cobbler asked, his eyes lighting up as he practically danced on his hooves.
“You surely can!” Dearborn laughed, ruffling his mane.
The two of them were standing in Dearborn’s massive workshop surrounded by his creations, some finished, some half-finished, and some simply abandoned. But this automaton that they had just finished building was the result of half a year’s work, and it was the first automaton that Cobbler and his grandfather had built entirely together.
The thing was pony-shaped, like most of Dearborn’s creations, but small and svelte with a longer body and more articulate joints than usual. The goal had been to create something that could not only walk, but run as fast as a normal pony.
“Do you think it’ll fall over again?” Cobbler asked, worry lines crossing his face.
“It may,” Dearborn said. Then, with a smirk, he added, “But if it does, then we’ll just pick it up and try again. Whatever the case, we’ll learn from it.”
Cobbler nodded. “Okay, okay! Let’s do it!”
Dearborn laughed. “All right now, Cobbler,” he said, sliding over a stepladder so he could more easily reach the switches on the thing’s back, “go ahead and turn ‘er on.”
Cobbler climbed the ladder and hit the switch. According to its programming, it was supposed to run a hundred meters down the length of the workshop, turn around, and come back again, where it would come to a complete stop. Nothing complex for a pony, but to get an automaton to coordinate between accelerating, running at full gallop, stopping, turning, and doing it again was no easy task.
As the automaton hummed with electricity, it began to trot, wobbling slightly at first, but then it steadied out and broke into a run, its metallic hooves pounding on the hard stone floor.
“It’s doing it, Granddad!” Cobbler cried, jumping up and down with excitement. “It’s really doing it!”
“Hold on there, boy,” Dearborn said, though his eyes were also flashing with excitement. “Here comes the tricky part.”
As the automaton approached the end of the long aisle, it began to slow. It began to turn, wobbling all the while, and at first it looked as though it would topple over. But then it finished the turn and began to run back towards them.
“Here it comes!”
“Stand back, now!”
The automaton again managed to slow down, its metal body rattling as it finally came to a stop right where it had begun.
“It works!” Cobbler cheered.
Dearborn let out a sigh of relief as he went over to the automaton and switched it off. “Yes, it surely is a work of art, Cobbler,” he said. Then his expression changed, and his wrinkled, gray features seemed to sag, his ears drooping.
Cobbler frowned, putting his small hoof on his grandfather’s side. “What’s wrong, Granddaddy?” he asked.
“Oh, it’s nothing, just…” He heaved another sigh. “I thought that by the time I reached my age, automata like this would be all over the place. I do so love creating these miraculous machines, but it seems even now that their time has yet to come.”
Cobbler bit his lip, hesitating a moment before he replied, saying, “Daddy says you’re mad at Princess Celestia.”
Dearborn raised an eyebrow.
“He says you’re still mad ‘cause she wouldn’t let you build that farming one a long time ago!”
Dearborn sighed. “I was,” he said. “Though it’s not that she wouldn’t let me build ‘em. It’s just that she wouldn’t endorse ‘em. Without her approval, nopony else would give ‘em a try. And such things weren’t easy or cheap to build. If she’d given it her approval, then maybe…”
He trailed off, shaking his head.
“Oh, never mind it all now,” he said, pulling in his grandson for a hug. “I suppose it just wasn’t meant to be. But as long as I’ve got a smart grandson like you to carry on the work, I’m sure that someday their time will come.”
Cobbler hugged him back, nuzzling him. “I love you, Granddad,” he said.
Dearborn smiled. “I love you too, my boy,” he said. “Now let’s get cleaned up, or your mama will give us an earful for getting oil all over her nice, clean house!”

***

“Granddaddy died that summer,” Cobbler said, heaving a sigh. “We did at least manage to build another automaton before he passed away. And even though Daddy wanted to sell off all the automata that he’d built, we still kept them. It helped that Granddaddy left the workshop and all that was inside to me, and not to my father. He couldn’t do a thing to them without my permission, so I started going there on my own to craft my own designs.”

Twilight nodded. “I see,” she said. “I’m kind of surprised that your father and grandfather didn’t get along very well.”

“Oh, they were just two very different ponies,” Cobbler said, waving a hoof. “But just the same, they respected each other in their own way. Even though Daddy didn’t understand the potential for the automata, he never forbade me from building them. And Daddy was perhaps even more incensed than Granddad himself that Celestia had blackballed his farming automaton.

“For almost all of my childhood, I heard from him what Granddad had tried to do to help the ponies of Equestria,” Cobbler said, frowning. “But even I hadn’t realized how deep that resentment had run. Not until a few years later…”

***

45 years ago...
It was in the autumn when Cobbler awoke to the sound of pencils and paper falling to the floor. He sat up from where he sat at his desk, the light from the kerosene lantern on his desk dimly illuminating his room. He was fifteen years old and was putting all his effort into his advanced studies, intending to go off to a university by the start of next year. He’d long outpaced his classmates in school, showing aptitude in all sorts of areas, especially the sciences.
The cost of his success, of course, had been staying up many a long night. And that night, once again, he’d fallen asleep at his desk. An involuntary jerk of his foreleg had sent the pencils and paper flying.
“Consarn it!” he grumbled, gathering up his materials. He did his best to stay quiet, not wanting to wake his mother and father, but then he peered out his window and spotted something in the darkness, slipping off into the orchard.
He furrowed his brow. That figure looked familiar. He saw it nearly every day, after all, so he was almost certain that he’d seen his father sneaking out of the house.
At first, he considered ignoring it entirely, but the rebellious teenage curiosity in him caused him to put out his lamp and, with a mischievous grin on his face, follow his father out into the darkened countryside.
To his surprise, his father wasn’t going to some clandestine poker game or any other such meeting. Instead, he tailed his father as he made his way along bare earthen pathways and over small streams as he went deeper and deeper into the forest. At last he saw him arrive at a sizable wooden cabin in the woods.
Fjord Mustang knocked on the door, and it opened a small crack. Cobbler was hidden behind a tree as he watched his father salute the pony behind the door.
“The gears will turn,” said the pony inside.
“The nation will rise,” Fjord replied.
Cobbler was barely breathing as he watched his father enter the cabin only to be greeted by a group of other ponies, stallions and mares alike, took seats on benches in what looked to be a meeting hall of sorts. He moved around the cabin, peering in through the windows. There were lanterns, but they were all dimmed. As a result, he couldn’t make out the faces of any of the ponies inside. Their voices were likewise muffled.
He tensed up. He knew this was something secret. Something where they didn’t want anyone to know who they were or what they were up to. What could his father have been up to in a place like this with ponies like these?
He decided to try to creep closer in the hopes that he might hear them speaking. But as he stepped out, his hoof caught on a vine and he stumbled forward, tumbling out of the woods and into the pale moonlight.
The ponies inside all stood up and looked out the window, locking their eyes on him.
“Intruder!” one of them bellowed.
Cobbler scrambled to his hooves, intending to gallop away as fast as he could, but one of the larger, more athletic ponies inside was on him before he could even reach the trees. Soon several of them had pinned him to the ground as he struggled.
“What are you doin’ here, boy?!” shouted one.
“He’s some kid from town!” shouted another.
“The Royal Guard send you here? Are you spyin’ on us, boy?!”
Cobbler looked all around in a panic until a familiar voice shouted, “Stop!”
They all turned, and Cobbler saw his father come through the crowd as it parted.
“D-Daddy?” Cobbler whimpered.
“That’s my boy, Cobbler Mustang,” Fjord said, letting out a long sigh. “Let him up.”
They did as he asked, and Cobbler got up, going to stand before his father.
“Daddy, I--”
Fjord slapped him across the face. “Boy, you have got some nerve, sneaking around in the dark like this, tryin’ to spy on your own father!” he yelled. “I thought you were either asleep or tendin’ to your studies!”
Cobbler began to tear up. “Daddy?” he asked. “I… I’m sorry, but… but what’s going on here? Who are these ponies?”
There was a hearty laugh as a younger, impeccably dressed gray stallion with a neatly combed mane walked over to them. “Looks like you’ll have to come clean, Fjord!” he said, his boisterous laugh echoing throughout the trees. He clapped both Cobbler and Fjord on the back. “You always said you wanted to bring your boy into this, Fjord. Well, now’s your chance!”
“Into what?” Cobbler asked, still looking around nervously. “What is all this?”
Fjord sighed. “Come inside, boy, and then keep quiet while the adults talk.”
Cobbler bowed his head and followed Fjord inside with the others.
As he did, the boisterous pony from before came up and took him by the hoof. “Don’t sweat it, kid,” he said, flashing a broad grin. “You’ll fit in before you know it! The name’s Cave Dweller, by the way! Scientist and salespony extraordinaire! You know, I’ve heard all about you and your inventions from your father. Maybe one day you and I could--”
“Save it for later, Cave!” hissed one of the others. “And keep your voice down! What part of ‘clandestine secret meeting’ didn’t you get?”
“Ah hahaha, you got me there!” Cave said, slapping Cobbler on the back once again. “We’ll talk later, kid!”
Still, despite the strange pony’s mannerisms, one thing stuck out to Cobbler: Cave had heard about his work from his father. His father did talk about him! He was proud of him!
Cobbler smiled as he sat next to his father on a bench seat while the speaker took the podium at the head of the room.
“Quit smilin’ like that, you dunderhead,” Fjord grumbled, giving him a hard look. “Now pay attention.”
The speaker cleared her throat. “My friends, there is good news and bad news this week,” she began. “The good news is that another of our members is on the town council, and I’m sure we all know whom I’m referring to.”
The ponies gathered all laughed but lightly rapped their hooves on the benches in applause.
“The bad news is that our latest polls indicate a 5% decrease in the number of ponies dissatisfied with Celestia’s rule.”
This got a round of jeers from the others.
“Still, we know that we will prevail!” the speaker declared. “We will one day all celebrate as we witness the rebirth of a new independent Mustangia!”
The ponies cheered again, but Cobbler only sat there. He looked over to his father and saw the smile on his face. All at once, he figured it out.
“Daddy,” he whispered, “you’re a secessionist?”
Fjord grinned, practically snorting as he held in a laugh. “Well, it seems you’ve figured it out, son,” he said. “Welcome to the Mustangian Independence Movement.”
Cobbler stared at his father in silence.
“Quit starin’ at me like that, Cobbler,” Fjord hissed. “Just keep quiet; you might learn somethin’.”

***

“So, your father really was a member of the secessionist movement, like you said,” Twilight surmised.

Cobbler nodded. “At first,” he said, “I was too shocked to say anything. To find out my father was a member of some clandestine organization was, well, surprising, to say the least.”

“But you told me that the group disbanded!” Twilight exclaimed.

“And it did,” Cobbler sighed. “For a time, I was proud to have something to share with my father. I began attending those meetings, feeling like quite the adult among so many other important and mature ponies.

“However, I was mostly expected to just sit quietly and observe, and I soon realized they were a bunch of squabbling old ponies with their heads on backwards. They treated inconsequential policy changes as though they were major battles in a war for independence and ignored the fact that the average mustang considered themselves part of Equestria and had no interest in secession. And then, I soon saw, the edges began to fray. I began to see that the group was falling apart. And at the center of it all was that proud, fast-talking pony, Cave Dweller…”

***

“I demand we re-draft our Declaration of Independence!” shouted one of the members at a late-night meeting.
“And I say we’ve already perfected it!” shouted another. “What we’ve proposed is the best way to declare our independence from the rest of Equestria! All you want to do is add to your own agenda!”
“What?! Why, sir, I never--”
“SHUT UP!”
They all turned to see Cave Dweller standing on top of the podium, his hooves raised to the heavens.
“That’s right, I said shut up!” he shouted. “You know, I joined this whole operation a few years back because all you ponies promised a new nation free from Celestia’s constant worrying about things like the role of technology or proper procedure or ethics boards. Little stuff like that! But now…” He chuckled, straightening his tie. “Look at you all: squabbling about a declaration you’ll probably never deliver.”
“Sir, you insult us!” said one of the older members.
“And why not?” Cave Dweller asked, rolling his eyes. “You’ve been going after this, celebrating every minor victory toward a cause practically nopony cares about or even knows about. For pony’s sake, Mustangia joined Equestria a hundred years ago.”
“It was two hundred years ago!” shouted another member indignantly.
“My point exactly!” Cave Dweller said, thumping the podium. “Practically nobody gives a good rotten peach if Mustangia is independent or not! By now, every single one of you was born into a Mustangia that was under Equestrian control. Not one of you remembers what the place was like before then! While you’re all fantasizing about the good ol’ days you can’t even remember, my group of scientists is the only group that’s bringing in new money!”
“You connivin’ carpetbagger!” shouted one of the mares. “Why, my family has given a bounty of bits to the cause!”
“I said new money,” Cave Dweller said. “A lot of you have farms and factories and stores, but you all know that you’re giving money that you’ll never get back. You want to see change around Equestria, then you might as well give up on all this make-believe nonsense about Mustangia seceding and put your bits someplace it will really count!”
The others all grumbled and began to squabble again until Fjord stood up, raising his hoof tentatively. The others all fell silent as he rose from his seat.
“What do you propose, Cave Dweller?” Fjord asked.
Cobbler saw that his father’s face was calm, but he could read the doubt in his eyes. Whether that was doubt in Cave Dweller or perhaps doubt in the cause itself, Cobbler couldn’t tell.
“Glad you asked!” Cave Dweller said, flashing his trademark grin. “We’re all spread apart. We’re too nebulous and too focused on different things! We need to come together into one place and put all our effort into something substantial. Spurned scientists and inventors for over a century have come to us, so why not take advantage of that? Let’s forget all this nonsense about a free Mustangia and start building our own nation! Instead of trying to recapture the past, let’s build a new nation! That’s right, we’ll make a new nation based on science! Science and technology, and all without worrying what Celestia or anypony else thinks!”
The older pony who’d spoken earlier got to his hooves, getting his hat and coat as he turned and stormed out of the building. A few more followed suit.
Cobbler’s father was not among them. And all the while, Cobbler Mustang simply sat in silence, mesmerized and dazzled at the thought of what Cave Dweller was proposing.
A new nation, Cobbler said to himself, feeling his pulse quicken. A nation based on science and technology. Why, I could build anything I liked! I could experiment all day, every day! No more worrying about Daddy’s business or anything else!
He heard Fjord clear his throat and turned to face him.
“Daddy?”
“Cobbler… go home.”
Cobbler gawked at him. “But Daddy, I--”
“You heard me, boy, now get!” Fjord snapped. “I’ve got some thinkin’ to do, an’ I don’t want you around while I do it!”
Cobbler grit his teeth, staring hard at his father before turning and dashing from the meeting hall, out into the night.

***

“That was the last meeting of the Mustangian Independence Movement that I ever attended,” Cobbler said, leaning back in his chair. “Shortly thereafter, I’m told, the group split apart. A few tried to keep it going and formed some tiny splinter cells, but they might as well have disappeared off the face of the planet. And in its place, Cave Dweller’s group began to take hold, though I wouldn’t find out until much later.”

Twilight narrowed her eyes. “So, that’s how TechQuestria was born?” she asked.

He shook his head. “It was little more than a think-tank,” he replied. “And it didn’t go by that name. Not yet, at least.”

“Just the same,” Twilight said, “you must have been happy about the change.”

“I barely thought about it,” Cobbler said, giving a shrug. “By that time, I had been accepted into the Sweet George Institute of Technology, or just George Tech, as we called it. All my efforts and studies had finally paid off, and I was out on my very own for the first time!” He puffed his chest out with pride.

Twilight nodded appreciatively. “It really is impressive,” she said, “being accepted to a university like that when you were so young.” Then she frowned. “But, please, what does this have to do with Turing? With… with your daughter?”

Cobbler’s smile faded. “I beg your pardon, Twilight,” he said, “but I feel I must tell this story my way. If you don’t know the whole truth, you can’t know how it was all connected. For you see, it was my rapid advancement in my studies of mechanical engineering that finally earned my father’s respect. He called me home one summer day, and at first I thought he wanted me to come help at one of the businesses again. But he had something else in mind.”

Twilight raised an eyebrow and waited for him to continue.

“Daddy was never quite as focused on technology and innovation as Granddad and I, despite appreciating their uses,” he said, “but he had quite the passion for history and archeology. His study was adorned with artifacts from ancient civilizations: traditional zebra masks, buffalo peace pipes, scrimshaw from pegasus fishing tribes, and all manner of books on the subject. And that night, he showed me his latest and greatest acquisition…”

***

Forty-three years ago...
Cobbler shivered as an unseasonably chilly wind blew his mane back. He was seventeen and still taking summer classes at George Tech, but his father had ordered him home with the utmost urgency and no explanation. Whatever he’d wanted mattered little to him that night, however, as he stood by the receiving platform at his father’s factory.
Fjord was simply standing by, checking his watch as a sizable group of workers milled about, idly waiting for the train to arrive.
“I don’t see what this has to do with me, Daddy,” Cobbler grumbled. “And I don’t understand why you don’t just come out and tell me!”
“Mind your manners, boy,” Fjord said, rubbing his forelegs to stay warm.
“And don’t call me ‘boy!’” Cobbler snapped. “Why, I am a grown stallion on my own! I’m a university student and I’m making a name for myself!”
“I’ll remind you that I’m the one who pays for your schoolin’ there, boy,” Fjord said, turning to grin at him. “But I do agree that you will one day make a name for yourself. After all, you are a member of the Mustang Peaches, and one day you will be in charge of this business.”
“I don’t want any of that,” Cobbler said, shaking his head. “I’m going to be a great engineer. Why, all that tinkering in Granddad's workshop you said was a waste of time has left me one of the best in my class! My professors say they’ve never seen a brighter student!”
“That’s what I’m countin’ on, b-- Cobbler,” Fjord said, his mischievous grin becoming genuinely warm. He put his foreleg over his shoulder. “Whether you maintain this business yourself or appoint an overseer or just sell the whole enterprise, I am certain you will be a great stallion among others.”
Cobbler froze and gawked at his father. “Daddy,” he breathed. “I… why, you’ve never spoken like that to me before.”
Fjord bristled and looked away. “Don’t make a fuss, Cobbler,” he said, his cheeks reddening. Then his ears perked up and he looked up the railroad tracks.
A train whistle echoed out in the dark hills. Soon they spotted the bright headlight as the locomotive approached the factory, slowing down as it brought in its cargo. It screeched to a halt, releasing a cloud of steam as it did so.
Cobbler waved the steam away and saw that the train was not loaded with boxcars carrying fuel, hay, scrap metal, or any of the other usual cargo. Instead, the cars were flatbeds with massive wooden crates strapped tightly to them.
“Take ‘em to Warehouse 13,” Fjord said to the forepony.
“Understood, boss,” the worker said.
“And use the utmost care!” Fjord added. “This cargo is extremely valuable!”
Cobbler watched as they used a crane to load the crates onto dollies and then took them to Warehouse 13, which he knew to be empty.
Once the crates were unloaded, Fjord called for a crowbar and had one of the crates pried open. The tall crate was so large that a ladder was needed to reach the lid.
Fjord turned to Cobbler. “Well, go take a look,” he said, gesturing to the ladder.
Cobbler raised an eyebrow at him. “What’s inside?” he asked.
“Go and see,” Fjord laughed. “I think it’ll be right up your alley!”
Cobbler eyed his father suspiciously, still unsure what the big secret was, but climbed the ladder just the same. When he arrived at the top, he saw that it was stuffed full of straw to cushion whatever lay inside. He brushed some of it aside. He peered down. There was something there.
He pushed more straw aside, and suddenly he was staring into a giant pony’s face.
He yelped, nearly falling backwards, but one of the pegasus workers caught him.
“Wh-what in the world?!” Cobbler gasped. He took a closer look. The pony wasn’t real, he saw. It was made of baked clay and covered with a shiny, dark purple lacquer that was worn with age. It stared up at him lifelessly with eyes of polished yellow jewels.
“A… a statue?” he asked. Then he frowned and looked down the ladder at his father, who was still grinning. “You brought me here to look at your latest collection piece? A dang statue?!”
“That’s no statue, Cobbler,” Fjord said, calling for another ladder. He climbed it and stood next to his son. “This is a treasure that some thought lost to time, but after years of searching for it, my associates found it in the ruins of a stone temple in the middle of an endless desert in a far-off land. This is the ancient legend of the Yudacorns. This, Cobbler, is a golem.”
Cobbler’s mouth dropped open. Though he knew only a little of the legend, any automaton fanatic would be instantly fascinated by the prospect of an ancient automaton. Indeed, this was perhaps the world’s oldest automaton, and it was right here before him!
“Does… does it work?” Cobbler asked.
Fjord clapped him on the shoulder. “That’s what I want you to find out,” he said. “For once, our interests seem to have converged. I’ll provide you with all the knowledge about the Yudacorns I can uncover, and you’ll see if you can figure out how it works.”
Cobbler bit his lip.
“Oh, don’t worry about your other studies, Cobbler,” Fjord said. “I wouldn’t dream of taking you from them. Consider this something to do when you have the spare time. After all, there is nopony in Mustangia who knows more about automata than you. I trust that you will eventually discover how to get it working once again.”
Cobbler at last broke into a smile. This was the chance of a lifetime. The legendary magical and technological construct was in his hooves, and he alone would be allowed to learn its secrets. With the knowledge he gained and the benefit of modern technology, he could build machines greater than even his grandfather could have imagined!
But still, he paused. “Daddy?” he asked. “I’ll be glad to do all this, but I just have to know… why do you want me to figure out how it works?”
Fjord was about to answer when they both heard chuckling behind them. They turned and saw who had strolled into the warehouse, his hooves lightly clicking on the hard concrete floor.
“Well, since you asked,” said Cave Dweller as he came into view, “let’s just say that science is its own reward.”
Cobbler gaped at the pony.
“Of course, we’re also counting on some actual rewards too, son,” Cave said, making a grand gesture as he stared off at some unseen, distant star. “Just you wait, kid! One day, we’re gonna change the world!”

***

Twilight stared at him, her mouth hanging open. “The golem,” she managed to say. “I remember when we saw an image of one on a tablet at the museum in Manehattan.”

“Another donation from my father’s collection,” Cobbler said, grinning slyly. “After all, why keep a picture of the golem when I had the real thing?”

Twilight swallowed. “Is that how you created Turing and the others?” she asked. “You based them on the golem’s technology?”

“Well, in the simplest sense, Twilight,” he said, turning his hoof over in the air, “yes. The golem, I discovered, had a series of spheres within spheres made up of individual plates inside its head. On those plates were the ancient magical runes of the Yudacorns. They were carved into the stone pieces and then filled with orichalcum. The ancient mages enchanted them and thus gave the golem a mind of its own. Primitive compared to what we’ve achieved with 002 and her successors, but millennia ahead of anything else in their time!”

Twilight rubbed her chin. “I see,” she said. “Then Turing Test and the others also have… runes in their heads?”

“Yes, but the system they operate under is far more complex,” Cobbler replied. “And even then, the golem took years of study to begin to decode and understand. Indeed, it took around twenty years before I finally cracked the code in its entirety.

“But while that was all going on, I had other things happening in my life. Indeed, the best was yet to come…”

***

Forty years ago...
Cobbler was trotting across campus one warm spring day when he heard a voice call out “Cobbler Mustang!”
He turned to look at the speaker... and the world became still.
Standing under a magnolia tree, its branches in full bloom with bright pink blossoms, was the most beautiful mare he had ever seen. She had shocking green eyes, a light pink coat, and a vibrant orange mane that was done up in elegant ringlets. She wore a plain white blouse with a pleated blue skirt.
His heart pounded, and his mouth felt dry. He became aware that he was staring and shook his head to clear his mind as he walked over to her.
“Y-yes?” he asked, trying to smile in a way that would look merely calm instead of giddy.
“Why look at you, Cobbler!” the mare exclaimed, her beautiful smile growing wider. “You haven’t changed a bit, you rascal!”
He froze, and his grin became forced. “Ah, well… yes, I mean,” he stammered.
Her smile faded, and she pouted at him. “Well, imagine that!” she cried indignantly, stomping her hoof. “To think that you would ever forget about me!”
He began to sweat. “I… I apologize, I’ve just been so wrapped up in my studies,” he said, “that I truly cannot recall the last time I was able to socialize.”
She raised an eyebrow, and a mischievous grin appeared on her face. “Is that so?” she asked. “Then perhaps you’ll remember… this!”
To his surprise and embarrassment, the mare leapt at him and tackled him to the ground where she began to tickle him furiously.
“Hahahaha stop!” he shouted, noticing that other students walking across the quad were staring at him. “P-please -- hahaha -- please, Miss, everypony’s staring!”
“I shall not let you go until you remember!” she laughed. “Besides, you were the one who always used to start our tickle fights!”
He gasped in spite of how hard he was laughing and whipped his head around to stare at her.
“Sweet Clementine?!” he exclaimed.
She at last relented and clapped her hooves together. “Oh, Cobbler, you do remember!” she cried, squealing with delight.
Then she noticed that she was straddling him, her muzzle mere inches from his.
“O-oh!” she stammered, stepping back as he got to his hooves, brushing magnolia blossoms from his shirt. “I’m terribly sorry, Cobbler. I saw you and simply lost my mind. I do hope you are not cross with me?”
She put out her lip, looking at him like a misbehaving filly. He would have forgiven her for anything with a look like that.
“It’s quite all right,” he said, smiling at her. “But Clementine--”
“Clemie,” she said, holding up a hoof. “Call me by my old nickname.”
“Th-then, Clemie,” he said, starting again, “where have you been all these years?”
“Well, Cobbler, back when you and I were friends, my father was a clerk down at the Mustang City general store,” she said. “But it seems that Daddy was moonlighting as a bootlegger. He was running white lightning all over the region. Well, once the authorities caught wind, he just up and moved the two of us all over Equestria. Then one day he just took off and never came home.” She looked down at that. “I’ve been a ward of the State for the last few years.”
Cobbler frowned. “Why, Clemie, I had no idea!” he said, reaching over to her, placing a hoof gently on her shoulder.
She smiled. “Well, pay it no mind,” she said. “I have been studying hard to make something better of myself, and now I am here at this university, learning all about agriculture!”
Cobbler’s smile returned. “I see!” he said. “It certainly is fortunate that we would meet up here again after all these years.”
“So tell me,” she began, “are you a first year as well? And what are you studying?”
Cobbler blushed. “I… well, actually, I entered early, and it seems that I am about to graduate,” he explained. “And after that, I intend to pursue a doctorate. One day, I just might be the one teaching the classes instead of taking them!”
He thrust out his chest, and Clementine began to laugh.
“Oh my!” she cried, making a silly face. “Does that mean that I will someday have to call you Professor Cobbler Mustang?”
Rather than laughing, he only smiled serenely at her. “No,” he said softly, meeting her eyes. “You, Clemie, can always just call me Cobbler.”
Her cheeks reddened. “A-all right then,” she said, looking away. Then she took a deep breath and met his eyes again. “But what’s this about you spending all your time studying and never socializing?”
“Well, I suppose that’s just how it’s been,” he said, shrugging his shoulders. “After all, I intended to graduate at the end of two years, so I’ve been taking about 25 credit hours each semester.”
She gawked at him. “My my my!” she breathed. Then she stood up straight, almost like a soldier. “Well, even if that is the case, I’m afraid it simply will not do. Cobbler Mustang, it’s not good to be working all the time!”
“I--”
“And that is why,” she said, her expression still serious, “I will do you the favor letting you buy me coffee at the student center cafe.”
He blinked. “Letting me… what?”
“I… I want to have coffee,” she said, her blush returning. “With you. To catch up.”
And then his own cheeks began to burn. “Ah!” he cried, just a little louder than he would have liked. “Yes, of course! I would like some coffee too! To catch up with you!”
The two of them continued staring at each other until they both erupted into nervous chuckles.
“Well, when shall I meet you?” she asked.
He took out his pocket watch, but then paused and stuffed it back into his shirt without consulting it. “Right now,” he said, gesturing toward the student center building.
“What? But don’t you have a class?” she asked.
He shrugged. “I suppose, but I’ve devoted enough time to study in that class,” he said. “Right now, there’s something else I’d rather be doing, and this is just where I want to be.”
He offered her his hoof, and she smiled as she took it, letting him lead on.

***

“The next few years were like a dream,” Cobbler said, tilting his head back as he heaved a sigh. He closed his eyes, smiling at the memory. “I’d always considered my work to be the most important thing in my life, but courting Sweet Clementine fulfilled me in ways I’d never imagined. She was so kind and funny, and every day after our respective classes, we’d find each other and eat dinner together, or read a book, or debate over coffee, or simply fall asleep snuggled up next to each other while we played a record. It truly was like paradise.”

He opened his eyes and turned to face Twilight, who was smiling.

“She sounds lovely, Cobbler,” she said. Then, pausing, she asked, “So, what happened then?”

“Well,” he said, “we had plans to get engaged after we received our respective degrees. I even finally achieved my goal and was hired right out of school as an associate professor at George Tech. But right as things looked perfect, life reminded us both that fate can be cruel at times.”

“What happened?” Twilight asked.

He heaved a sigh. “My mother died,” he said quietly. “She… it was just a simple bee sting, but nopony ever knew she was allergic. She’d somehow gone her whole life without being stung, and then one day while she was tending her flowers… well, they rushed her to hospital, but it was too late.”

Twilight frowned. “I’m sorry, Cobbler,” she whispered. “I saw her grave behind your house. I’m sure she was a wonderful mare.”

“Indeed she was,” Cobbler said, nodding his head. “But as much as she meant to me, I realized she meant even more to my father. After her passing, Daddy seemed to just fade away. I tried my best to help with the business here and there between my new teaching duties, my studies, and tending to the mare who somehow forgave me for postponing our engagement, but Daddy never was the same.

“He just seemed to stop caring about his appearance and his health, and I later learned that his involvement with Cave Dweller fell by the wayside as well. Within a year, he also passed away.”

Twilight hung her head. “I… I can’t even imagine that, Cobbler,” she whispered. “If I ever lost my parents, I don’t know what I’d do.”

“It was the most awful feeling I’d ever experienced up to that point,” he said. “And that’s why Clemie found me in the graveyard that one evening 35 years ago…”

***

Thirty-five years ago...
Sweet Clementine woke up from her nap on the couch in the living room of the Mustang Peach family mansion. It had been a trying few days since Fjord Mustang’s funeral. Cobbler had kept his composure through the funeral and spoken finely of his father, impressing the whole countryside as they came to pay their respects to one of Mustangia’s greatest leaders.
The cards came pouring in, and that fell to Auntie Bellum and herself, while Cobbler did his best to deal with managing his father’s will and tending to the businesses. He’d been granted leave for bereavement from the university, so that was one less thing on his mind, but still Cobbler seemed to have grown numb to the world around him.
Clementine went to the kitchen to get a glass of water, but then she looked out the back window and saw somepony as they made their way down the path behind the house toward the family graveyard just around the corner. She knew in an instant that it was Cobbler, and so she set her glass down and galloped out the backdoor to follow him.
It had been gray and miserable the last three autumn days, but only now that she left the house did it finally start to rain.
It came on suddenly, not with a light drizzle, but a sudden burst from the heavens. There was little wind and no thunder, but she quickly became drenched in the downpour of fat, heavy raindrops. But she paid it no mind as she followed the path and at last found Cobbler.
The young stallion was sitting on the ground before his father’s freshly dug grave, the overturned earth becoming thick, dark mud.
“Cobbler!” she cried.
He slowly turned to face her. His eyes were bloodshot and his mouth was hanging open and the rain had plastered his black mane to his head and neck. In contrast to the stoic image he’d been projecting for the last few days, she could see that he was sniffling and sobbing like a foal, at last showing the grief that he’d been keeping inside.
“Clemie,” he whispered. “I… Daddy left me everything. He even left a final letter to me s-saying how proud of me he was, and… and these last few years I f-felt like I was trying to get away from this place and trying to be a different pony, but I c-can’t remember the last time I told Daddy that--” he choked back a sob “--that I loved him and now I… I…”
He lowered his head, pounding the ground in frustration. “Oh, Clemie, what am I going to do now?!” he screamed. “I’m not half the pony my daddy was! I can’t run a business like he did! I… I can’t carry on the family name like this! I’m just a no-count, useless tinkering--”
“Stop it!” she shrieked, silencing him in an instant. She went to him, sitting next to him as she embraced him tightly. “You never talk like that again, Cobbler Mustang!”
He felt her trembling, and so he slowly returned the embrace, the two of them sitting by the grave as the rain poured down, soaking them both to the bone.
“Clemie,” he whispered, holding her more tightly.
“You are a wonderful, kind, and brilliant pony, Cobbler,” she said as she also began to break down. “I know your daddy was a great pony, but you are not him, nor should you be! You’re going to be great in your own way, and that’s why I love you!”
Cobbler said nothing at first.
“Cobbler, dear?” she asked.
He slowly released her and drew back. “Clemie,” he began, looking her in her beautiful green eyes, “do you truly mean all that?”
She managed a smile. “Oh, Cobbler, you silly thing,” she said. “Of course I do. I love you with all my heart. I can’t stand to see you hurting like this, so please don’t say such terrible things.”
“Then,” he said, taking a deep breath, “perhaps I should say something else.”
She stared at him uncomprehendingly for a moment until he took her hoof. Her eyes went wide, and she covered her mouth with her other hoof.
“Sweet Clementine, will you marry me?”
Even in the rain, he could see the happy tears in her eyes as she nodded. They held each other as their lips met, kissing each other as fiancés for the very first time.
“Well, it’s about dang time!” a mare’s voice shouted.
They both whirled around to see Auntie Bellum standing there under an umbrella.
“Auntie?!” Cobbler asked.
“I don’t suppose y’all could’ve waited to come in out of the rain, but at least you finally popped the question, nephew,” she said. Then she smiled. “Now come on, let’s get you both inside ‘fore you both catch your death o’ cold!”

***

“And, once again, life was like a dream,” Cobbler said, smiling broadly. “After our wedding, we moved into the house and worked as a team to keep it all going. I taught a few classes at George Tech while doing my research on various new innovations and delegating how to run the businesses - and secretly continuing to acquire more ancient tomes to try and discover the secrets of the magical runes that powered the golem whenever possible - while Clemie took to managing the orchard with her expertise in agriculture.

“My wife, Clementine, was truly one of a kind, Twilight,” he said, his eyes tearing up. “Oh, you would have loved her. She was just… just one of the most wonderful ponies you ever did see!”

Twilight frowned. Judging from his expression, she had a feeling that things hadn’t turned out the way he’d planned. Though she dreaded hearing what happened next, she placed her hoof on his shoulder and simply asked, “What happened to her?”

Cobbler took another deep breath, letting it out slowly. “It’s funny, Twilight,” he said, though his expression gave no hint of amusement. “We lived as a married couple, just the two of us for five years. It was only when we were both approaching thirty that we felt as though life had calmed down enough for us to have a child. Clementine talked endlessly about becoming a mother. She… she was so looking forward to it.

“But a month before her due date, while I was in my study, the maids suddenly screamed that Clemie had collapsed in the kitchen. She was…” he paused, gritting his teeth, forcing himself to continue speaking. “She’d fallen to the floor and was just screaming with pain. We rushed her to the hospital, and that was when the doctors told me that she was going into premature labor. I asked them, begged them to tell me what was wrong, but they ushered me out into the waiting room to take Clemie into surgery. They told me that my child was coming that day, due date or no.

“And so I sat out there in the waiting room, uncertain of what was going on with either my wife or our baby, until the doctor came out to speak with me at last…”

***

Thirty years ago...
Cobbler was sitting in the waiting room when the doctor came through the doors. He instantly got to his hooves.
“Dr. Stirrup!” Cobbler cried. “How’s my wife? Is she all right?”
“Professor Cobbler,” Dr. Stirrup said, heaving a long sigh. “Please, sit down.”
“I will do no such thing!” he shouted. “All this time I’ve spent sitting out here, nopony’s told me a thing! Why I’ve been worried sick, and I will have answers--”
“And I’ll give them to you now,” he said softly, gesturing to the couch where Cobbler had been sitting. “But please, I’d like you to sit down.”
Cobbler was about to protest again when he saw the somber, tired look in the doctor’s eyes. He sat down.
“Doctor?” he asked quietly, his voice almost a whimper. “What’s going on? How’s Clementine?”
Dr. Stirrup swallowed. “Sweet Clementine collapsed as the result of an amniotic fluid embolism,” he said. “It’s where amniotic fluid or skin cells or other material accidentally enters the mother’s bloodstream through the placental bed of the uterus. It’s extremely rare, but it causes a severe allergic reaction which causes heart and lung failure and severe hemorrhaging.”
Cobbler stared at him. He felt a tightness in his chest. “But… but you’re doing everything you can, right?” he asked. “You’re treating her?”
Dr. Stirrup bowed his head. “We tried, Cobbler,” he said, swallowing. “We really did do absolutely everything we could. But I’m afraid, in the end, her condition was too severe. There was nothing we could do.”
Cobbler’s head felt light. He was dizzy, and he had to steady himself by placing his forehooves on the arm of the sofa. His mouth felt dry. What the doctor had told him began to sink in.
Tears began to spill from his eyes. “Clementine’s… dead?”
Dr. Stirrup bowed his head. “I’m so sorry, Professor Cobbler.”
He vaguely remembered the sound he made: the awful, mournful sound of a pony who’d lost the most precious thing in the world. He could barely remember how he’d broken down and hugged the doctor, sobbing on his shoulder in spite of himself. He never thought he could feel something so awful as when his parents had died, but this feeling was truly the most awful thing he could imagine.
And yet, cutting through it all, he did finally hear one thing: “Would you like to see your baby?”
He swallowed, getting control of himself even as he stared at the doctor through tear-stained eyes. “I… what?”
“Cobbler, please, listen to me,” Dr. Stirrup said. “I’ve been trying to tell you that we saved the baby. She’s tiny, which isn’t unexpected for being born a month early, but - as near as we can tell - she’s in perfect health.”
“S-she?” he stammered.
Dr. Stirrup managed a smile. “You have a daughter, Cobbler Mustang,” he said. “Congratulations. You’re a father.”
***
Cobbler approached the crib in the neonatal ward. There were so many things running through his head that he didn’t know what to feel.
He was a widower. But he was a father. His family was gone. But there was a new baby here. His wife had died because of this child. But this child was his.
He stepped over to the crib and peered inside.
The tiny foal was wrapped up in a pink blanket. Her coat was a light brown, the color of coffee with milk, and her mane was dark brown. She was sleeping soundly, completely still as though she were merely a doll.
But as he rested his hooves on the edge of the crib, she opened her eyes and looked up at her father for the first time.
Her large glassy eyes were unfocused, but just the same they seemed to lock onto him, and she fidgeted, moving her little forehooves slightly.
Something in his chest swelled, and in spite of the grief that he felt, he couldn’t help but smile, his breath caught in his throat as he stared down at the tiny miracle before him.
He turned to face Dr. Stirrup. “May I hold her?” he asked.
Dr. Stirrup smiled. “Of course, Professor Cobbler,” he replied, “she’s your daughter.”
He gently picked her up, holding her in his forelegs. She murmured slightly, but then relaxed as he held her. The tiny filly shut her eyes contentedly as she went back to sleep.
Cobbler held back tears and laughed, holding his daughter close, rocking her back and forth. “Hello, little girl,” he whispered. “I’m your daddy. Welcome to the world.”
Dr. Stirrup came over. “What are you going to name her?” he asked.
Cobbler paused, pursing his lips. “We… Clementine and I, that is, had considered naming the baby George, after the university where we started courting, if it was a colt,” he replied. “But, since it’s a filly, I believe I’ll call her... Georgia.” He smiled, nodding at the sound of the name. “Yes, that’s it. I’ll name her Georgia Peach.”
The doctor nodded, then left to get the paperwork and the birth certificate.
With the two now alone, Cobbler whispered, “I certainly wish your mama was here to see you.” He took a deep breath. “But don’t you worry. I’m gonna love you and raise you the best that I can, even if it’s all on my own.
“The world is a wonderful place, but it can also be tough sometimes, Georgia. But don’t you fret,” he said, kissing her on the forehead. “I’ll use everything at my disposal to shelter you and keep you safe.”

To be continued…

Author's Notes:

And so we see Cobbler's troubled backstory begin. Next time, it's the end of his beginning...

References:

-The biggest one, which may become more significant in the next chapter, is the title, which is named after Porter Robinson and Madeon's collaboration song "Shelter." I'm a big fan of both artists, so their collaboration last year was a dream come true for me. I'll explain more about this song choice next time, but for now, enjoy the tune!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HQnC1UHBvWA

-Sweet Clementine's name is based off of two things: First, it sounds like the song "Sweet Caroline," by Neil Diamond, one of my favorites for karaoke, but more directly she's named after the song "My Darling Clementine," made famous by Huckleberry Hound, but also foreshadowing her tragic end and Cobbler grieving over her with the lyric "You are lost and gone forever, oh my darling Clementine."

-Cave Dweller, some of you can probably guess is based off of Cave Johnson, ebullient shower curtain salesman and eventual CEO of Aperture Science, the location for the video game Portal and its sequel. Cave is quite prominent in Portal 2, and his love for science is legendary... as is his recklessness with applying it.

-Sweet George Institute of Technology is another dual reference, first to the song "Sweet Georgia Brown," which was actually one name I considered for Georgia Peach (you probably know the song as that one they play for basketball games, especially the Harlem Globetrotters), and also to the real Georgia Institute of Technology, or simply Georgia Tech, based in Atlanta.

-Fjord Mustang's described appearance is based on, obviously, his namesake, Henry Ford.

-The warehouse where they take the golem is called Warehouse 13, which is the name of a TV show about a building where people store magical artifacts... apparently. I think I half-remembered said show, which means this isn't technically an intentional reference, but I'm gonna run with it.

-Those of you familiar with lore about golems might haven noticed the markings on the golem's head. I'll let you figure out that tidbit, which was added by my illustrator, Greenfinger, all on his own. It has my approval, though.

-Dr. Stirrup's name is also a bit of a play on words: Stirrups are used to hold one's feet when riding a horse, but he's also an obstetrician. When examining a woman, an obstetrician will often have his or her patient put her legs up in stirrups to hold them.

I hope you enjoyed this bit of backstory. See you next time!

Shelter, Part 2

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Twilight and Cobbler sat down together on the sofa back in Twilight’s ‘quarters.’ After telling the first part of his story, they both felt that they needed a break. Thus, even though it was getting late, they both settled in at the coffee table with some cups of tea.

Twilight gently lifted the teacup with her hooves, finding it a bit awkward to do so since she typically raised it with her magic. However, with the magic suppressor on her horn, that wasn’t an option.

She blew on the tea to cool it slightly before taking a sip. “I’m sorry, Cobbler,” she said quietly. “About your wife, I mean. It sounds like she was a wonderful pony.”

“That she was,” Cobbler replied, smiling as he also took a sip of his tea. “I suppose, though, that I should simply be grateful for the time we had together. Many wonderful years, and it was only an accident of nature that took her from me. I couldn’t be angry about that.

“After all,” he said, his expression darkening, “it isn’t as though that time was stolen from us.”

Twilight looked away. She was fairly certain that she knew who that jab was directed at, but she kept silent and set her teacup down.

“Maybe it would be best if you continued your story,” Twilight said, turning to face him. “After all, I still don’t quite see how this connects to Turing Test.”

“Yes, I suppose I should get on with it,” Cobbler said, nodding as he took a long drink of tea. He gave a satisfied sigh and set his cup down as well. “You don’t have any foals in your family at present, do you Twilight?”

Twilight shook her head. “No, not yet,” she said, then smiled, adding, “but my brother and sister-in-law are having a baby soon.”

“Ah yes,” he said, nodding and likewise giving her a warm smile. “Congratulations. Children can be quite a lot of work, but few things can enrich one’s life or give a sense of purpose quite like having a child of your own.

“Still, I was swiftly overwhelmed when I brought Georgia home. Fortunately, Auntie Bellum came to help. She never married or had foals, but she’d done her fair share of babysitting and helped care for me when I was born. She truly was a blessing and helped me keep my wits as I tried to balance being a single father, dealing with Clementine’s death, and managing my business. But fortunately, Georgia Peach was a very even-tempered baby. Sweet, not fussy at all, at least in Auntie’s estimation. But even though Auntie and the servants helped out with a lot of it, I personally made it my responsibility to hold her, give her a bottle, and rock her to sleep each night.”

He shut his eyes, remembering. “She was such a tiny thing,” he said quietly. “But she began to grow, and soon I had a toddler on my hooves. Auntie Bellum stayed for so long that she just decided to stay with us, and I had no objection either. That big house felt a little less lonely with the three of us living there. Just the same, I turned back to my other side projects once she was a bit older, and perhaps I relied on Auntie and the help too much…”

***

Twenty-five years ago...
Cobbler was at his desk in his private study. In front of him were pages upon pages of scrawled notes of the Yudacorns’ strange runes. He felt he was getting closer and closer to understanding the meaning of each one and that, he believed, would tell the whole story behind getting the golem to work again. Even though it had been well over ten years since his father had given him the strange stone automaton, he still pushed himself to unlock its secrets. Sweet Clementine’s death and Georgia Peach’s birth had interrupted his progress, but now that his daughter was five years old, she could get by without him constantly being around.
“This symbol,” he muttered, “it indicates something to do with change… or perhaps transference? Is that why it occurs so often between the different layers of the golem’s internal mechanism?”
He leaned back in his chair, stroking his chin. “But others occur in the intermediate layers too,” he said, shutting his eyes tightly. “How are they connected? And does it have to do with the order of the layers? I need to find more--”
“Daddy!”
He sat up with a start, jerking his head toward the door. Little Georgia Peach stood there with a straw hat adorned with a blue ribbon. She wore a broad, beaming smile on her face.
“Yes, sweetie, what is it?” he asked, hiding his irritation at being interrupted. She’d been told before not to disturb him while he was in his study.
“Daddy, I’m gonna have a tea party with the orchard workers!” she cried.
“Oh,” he said, blinking at her. “Well, that’s nice. They are doing that during their lunch break, aren’t they?”
“They surely are!” Georgia quipped. “They all promised we could have some tea and cookies! That nice Mr. Burning Bones says he’s gonna play his guitar for me!”
“Very well,” he said, nodding to her as he turned back to his work. “You go enjoy yourself.”
But Georgia shook her head. “No, Daddy!” she laughed. “I want you to come too!”
He looked over at her, his smile slipping. “When is it?” he asked slowly.
“Why, right now!” she exclaimed.
But he shook his head. “I’m truly sorry, honey, but I must return to my work. I’m very far behind on it. Perhaps another day…”
Georgia’s ears drooped. “But… but you’ve been working on those silly old papers for weeks,” she said. “Auntie says she can’t remember the last time you came to dinner.”
He waved her off. “I’m sure it hasn’t been that long.”
“It’s been more than twenty days,” she said. “And I certainly should know! I can count up to a hundred now, you know!”
“That’s nice,” he mumbled, picking up another paper.
“Daddy, come on,” she whined, sticking out her lower lip as she trotted over to him. “Won’t you please come? I miss you.”
“Not now, Georgia,” he replied, narrowing his eyes.
“Just for a while? I promise it’ll be just the funnest time!”
“Not now, Georgia!” he growled.
“Daddy, please!” she shouted, and burst into tears.
He finally raised his head again and saw the poor girl sitting on the floor as she cried. In an instant, his heart melted, and his anger dissolved. He went to her and embraced her.
“Oh, hush now, Georgia, Daddy’s sorry,” he said, holding her. “There there, my precious girl. I didn’t mean to be so hard on you.”
“I-I’m sorry too, Daddy,” she managed to say, wiping her eyes on her forelegs. Cobbler got her a handkerchief to blow her nose. “I know you’re ever so busy. We can have a tea party some other time.”
Cobbler sighed, standing up to get his jacket. “We can,” he said, “but it’s a beautiful day, and how could I possibly say no to such a request from a sweet young lady such as yourself?”
Her eyes lit up. “You mean…?”
“Let’s go to your tea party,” he said. “This work was going on when your granddaddy was still with us, so I think it’ll wait a little longer.”
“Oh, thank you, Daddy!” she cried, leaping up to embrace him again.
“You are quite welcome, my dear,” he said. “Now, let’s go. We shouldn’t keep your other guests waiting.”
***
After the tea party out in the orchard, Cobbler and Georgia took a walk around the countryside. On the way back, Georgia started to get tired, so Cobbler carried her on his head while she wore his hat.
“That Mr. Burning Bones was just wonderful with that guitar, Daddy!” Georgia said.
“So you’ve said, and I must say that I agree,” Cobbler said, glancing up at the filly. “Still, I say that you are mostly of that opinion because he wrote that song about you.”
She giggled. “Mayyyybeee…” she replied. “Sing it with me again, Daddy?”
Cobbler sighed. “Oh, Georgia, you know I’m not much of a singer. Besides, you get the easy parts…”
“Pleeeaase?” she whined, leaning over his muzzle to look at him upside-down.
“Oh you are getting a lot of mileage out of that word today, young lady,” he said. Still, he heaved a sigh and said, “Very well, but just one last time.”
“Hooray!” she cheered, nearly throwing Cobbler’s balance off as he trotted up the dirt road.
“Now let’s see… it starts… um…”
“‘No foal made…’”
“Oh, yes, yes, that’s it,” he said. He cleared his throat.
“No foal made has got a shade on--”
“Sweet Georgia Peach!” Georgia sang, completing the line.
“Four left hooves but how she grooves, that--”
“Sweet Georgia Peach!”
“They all sigh and wanna cry for--”
“Sweet Georgia Peach!”
“I’ll tell you just whyyy,” Cobbler sang, drawing out the syllable. “You know I don’t lie!”
“Not much!” Georgia sang, completing the line with a mischievous grin.
“It’s been said she knocks ‘em dead when she lands in town.
Since she came why it’s a shame how she’s cooled ‘em down.
Good friends that she can’t get, must be ponies she ain’t met.
Mustang named her, George Tech claimed her--”
“Sweet! Georgia Peach!”
They both laughed and were still humming the catchy little tune as they came round the bend and arrived at the path that led to their mansion.
But when they were nearly at the house, Cobbler slowed. He saw the pony sitting nearby, a glass of iced tea in his hoof as he chatted up one of the maids.
He made a face and set Georgia down. “Pardon me, Georgia, but it seems I have a guest today,” he said. “You go on inside and play, honey.”
“All right,” she said, nuzzling him. “Thanks for spending time with me. I love you, Daddy.”
Cobbler smiled down at her. “I love you too, Georgia Peach. Now go on. I’ll see you at dinner, if possible.”
The girl nodded and rushed toward the door. She smiled at their guest and gave a short curtsy before going on inside.
“Cute little filly!” the visitor said, walking over to him, sticking out his hoof. He had the same easy smile as before, the same snazzy suit, and also a pair of saddlebags laid across his back. “It’s been a long time, Professor!”
Cobbler managed a smile and shook his hoof, despite his uneasiness. “It certainly has, Cave Dweller,” he replied. “What brings you to my home?”
“Let me answer that question with a question,” he said, wiggling his eyebrows. “How’s the work on the golem going?”
Cobbler made a face. “Slowly,” he replied.
“Ah.” Cave Dweller nodded. “That’s what I figured. Maybe this will help.”
He reached into his saddlebag and removed a book, holding it open.
Cobbler gasped. It was a detailed listing of various Yudacorn runes, complete with pictures, instructions on proper stroke order, and notes on meanings laid out in plain Equestrian.
“Where did you get this?!” he demanded, reaching for the book.
But Cave Dweller snatched it back. “Ah ah ah, Cobbler Mustang,” he said, waving it tauntingly. “I just said it might help; I didn’t say you could have it.”
Cobbler frowned. “Trying to sell it to me?” he asked. “I see your old aspirations have dried up and you’re back to being a salespony.”
Cave Dweller shook his head. “Those days are long gone, my friend,” he said. “And my aspirations are stronger than ever!” He leaned in close, his voice barely a whisper. “You remember that ‘new nation’ I talked about? One based on science and innovation?”
Cobbler nodded.
“I built it.”
Cobbler gawked at him. “What?! Where?”
“Funny you ask that,” he said, chuckling. “Your old dad bought up an old salt mine a while back and turned it over to us. We started from there and just kept digging. We’re still in the process of turning it into something great, but more and more ponies who are sick of living under Equestria’s laws, and especially Celestia’s mistrust of technology, are coming in all the time. We’ve got some automaton builders among them, in fact.”
Cobbler had to admit that his interest was piqued. He hadn’t had as much time to devote to his old hobby as he would have liked, but his passion for those machines had never really gone away. The golem was part of that, of course.
“They idolized your grandfather,” Cave Dweller continued, “and they think you’ve got a bit of his old magic. I’m pretty sure it’s more than a bit.” He elbowed him, giving him a sly wink.
Cobbler heaved a sigh. “Cave Dweller, what do you want from me?” he asked, resignation in his voice.
“Three things,” he said. “One: I’d like you to collaborate with some of those automaton builders. Show ‘em what you know, maybe even learn from them. Form a little group. Just a club or something.”
“Done. Gladly.”
“Next, I want you to share your research on the golem and these darn runes,” he said. “I’ve got sources, including your dad’s old contacts overseas, so we can get more books like this one to help. But in exchange, some of my guys would like to help with the effort. Seventeen years is way too much time to spend on a single project without any payoff. You’re still in charge, and anything that gets published will have your name at the top, but maybe some extra hooves can speed things up.”
Cobbler rubbed his chin. He wasn’t necessarily keen on sharing his work with strangers, but he also had to admit that there was no end in sight if he kept working at this pace. Not to mention the fact that it was obviously taking him away from his other work… and especially his family.
“Very well,” Cobbler said. “And lastly?”
“And lastly,” Cave Dweller said, chuckling slightly. “I’d like you to come to Old Betsy with me.”
Cobbler tilted his head. “The old still? Daddy’s will said he wanted me to preserve it for some reason, so I suppose I can. But why--”
“Oh, you’ll see for yourself, Cobbler,” Cave Dweller said, holding out the book. “I think you’ll find we’ve been cooking up a lot more than brandy.”

***

“So that’s when he showed you TechQuestria,” Twilight surmised.

Cobbler nodded. “Yes, although it wasn’t called by that name back then,” he said. “Matter of fact, it didn’t even have a name yet. We just called ourselves ‘the Group,’ and that big hole in the ground ‘the Nation.’ I wasn’t all that impressed with the place just yet, but the ponies there were some of the most original free-thinkers and innovators I’d ever met. They even made the ponies at George Tech look like amateurs. I wasn’t too happy about the fact that they’d continued dwelling under my property for all that time, but I decided to let it go. If they could advance the work and free me up to spend more time with my daughter too, well, I figured it was worth the price.”

Twilight smiled. “You really did love her, didn’t you?” she said. “Georgia Peach, I mean.”

Cobbler returned the smile and puffed out his chest. “Of course!” he replied. “Why, she was the light of my life. And what father wouldn’t be proud of such a clever and well-mannered young lady? And perhaps the proudest day of all was when we celebrated her cutecañera, which we held the day after that film we watched was taken.”

He paused, his smile fading. “But,” he said, his voice quiet, “that was also the day when everything changed. Forever.”

***

Twenty years ago…
Cobbler stepped out his front door, dressed in his finest suit, and smiled brightly at the friends and neighbors. They were all likewise dressed in fancy clothes. Tables laden with snacks and bowls of punch had been set up, a piñata was hung from a branch of one of the great oak trees that lined the front path to the house, and the whole yard had been filled with decorations, including balloons and streamers and a banner that bore a picture of Georgia’s face. Several of the workers, Burning Bones included, had formed a band to play music for the event. He also had one of the servants holding his newly-purchased movie camera to capture the whole affair on film.
Truly, it was nothing but the best for the daughter of Mustangia’s most prominent citizen.
“My friends!” he shouted, raising his hoof. “Thank you all for coming! And now, without further ado, may I present a young filly who will no doubt one day become one of Equestria’s greatest horticulturalists… my daughter, Georgia Peach!”
Georgia emerged from the house, wearing an elegant white dress, her mane in ringlets and ribbons as she held her head high. The crowd erupted into applause.
Though she tried to keep her composure, Georgia couldn’t help herself and began to tear up at the sight of all the ponies gathered just for her.
“Oh… oh, everypony, I’m just ever so glad to see you all here!” she cried. “I simply don’t know what to say!”
“Ain’t nothin’ to say, Miss Georgia!” shouted one of the guests in the crowd. “Except maybe for ‘Let’s party!’”
This got a laugh from the crowd, Georgia included, and she wiped her eyes. “Yes, that’s right!” she said, rearing up and kicking her forelegs gleefully. “Let the party begin!”
At that, the band began playing a round of “Sweet Georgia Peach,” which by that time had become a fairly well-known tune around Mustangia, and the party went into full swing.
Well into the revelries, and after many a partygoer had come up to Cobbler to congratulate him on his daughter’s newfound special talent, Cave Dweller came up alongside Cobbler.
“Big day, my friend,” Cave Dweller said. He opened his suit a little and revealed a flask in his front pocket, raising an eyebrow mischievously.
“None for me, thank you,” Cobbler said, waving off the request. He turned to watch Georgia open her presents at the head of a long table. Her classmates and other children from around Mustang City were seated on either side, encouraging her to open their present next.
“I understand,” Cave Dweller said, closing his suit again. “I suppose I’d want to stay clearheaded at a time like this if I were in your horseshoes.” Then he chuckled and leaned in, his voice lowered to a whisper. “Still, seems everything is going great these days. Your daughter’s got her cutie mark, we’re finally getting some permanent residential buildings in the Nation, and next month is the first test of the newly-restored golem!”
“Right now, I’d rather not think of business or politics,” Cobbler whispered back. “I just want to watch my daughter open her presents.”
Cave Dweller nodded, and they both looked on as Georgia tore open another present, a box which contained a new straw hat.
“It’ll keep the sun out of ya eyes while ya workin’ in the garden, Miss Georgia!” said the colt who’d given it to her.
“Oh, I just love it, Dandy Fine!” Georgia exclaimed, placing it on her head. “And it’s a perfect fit!”
The little colt blushed. “W-well, it was just a lucky guess about ya hat size,” he stammered.
Cave Dweller snickered. “Looks like she might already have a gentlecolt admirer,” he whispered, elbowing Cobbler in the ribs.
Cobbler rolled his eyes. “Don’t even joke like that,” he said. “I hate to think of my little girl growing up so fast as it is, what with her new cutie mark and all.”
The next present was a set of gardening tools. After that came a watering can. Then a flower pot, a few packets of seeds, a guidebook of flowers, and so on.
With each present, Georgia’s excitement grew, her smile radiant and her eyes looking like they would practically pop right out.
But then everyone noticed that she seemed to be sweating an awful lot for such a temperate day, and she kept placing her hoof on her chest for some reason.
And then Cobbler watched as Georgia’s expression went from joyous to shocked and tense. She leaned forward over the table, gasping for air and clutching her chest, her eyes bulging.
“Georgia!” Cobbler screamed, dashing forward, plowing through the other partygoers as he ran to her side. He caught her just as she collapsed, gasping for air as she cried out in pain.
“D-daddy!” she managed to say. “My chest! It hurts! It-- augh!”
“Get a cart!” Cobbler bellowed, turning to the stunned onlookers, his eyes filled with panic. “We have to get her to a hospital now!”
***
Cobbler sat in the waiting room in Mustangia General Hospital once again. He was trembling, wondering what was happening to his daughter and filled with the memory of the last time he’d been there.
The day Georgia had been born. The day Sweet Clementine had died.
He’d been sitting in that very room.
He hated this place.
“Professor Cobbler Mustang?”
Cobbler stood to see a middle-aged unicorn stallion walking over to him. He was blue in color and had a straight, shiny black mane that was swept neatly over his forehead. He also had thick, round glasses and had just a hint of an accent that Cobbler couldn’t place.
“Yes, I’m Cobbler Mustang,” he said, getting to his hooves.
“I’m Dr. Dosanko Umahara,” he said, bowing to him slightly. “I’m a cardiologist, and I’m treating your daughter.”
“Is she all right?!” Cobbler demanded.
“She’s fine for now,” he replied.
He sighed with relief, but then paused. “What do you mean ‘for now?’”
Dr. Umahara shut his eyes. “Professor Cobbler… perhaps you should sit down.”
He felt lightheaded, and his throat went dry. Dutifully, he sat down.
“Doctor… what’s wrong with my baby girl?” he asked, his voice quiet and wavering.
Dr. Umahara sat down in front of him. “I pulled Georgia’s medical records. It seems she was born prematurely, correct?”
Cobbler nodded.
“That confirms our test results,” he said. He sighed heavily before continuing. “Professor, your daughter has a rare form of a degenerative heart condition called cardiomyopathy. The muscle walls of her heart are too thin and, as a result, her heart is pumping blood inefficiently. Over time, they will increasingly weaken to the point of heart failure.”
Cobbler gawked at him. “No,” he breathed. Then, urgently, he leaned forward and asked “What are the treatments?! Money is no object, I assure you!”
“There is some medication to slow the progression,” he said, “but she will eventually need a heart transplant.”
Cobbler managed to catch his breath. “I see,” he said. Then, drawing himself up, he said “Very well. Let’s find her a heart.”
“I’ve already added her to the waiting list for heart donation candidates,” Dr. Umahara said. Then he narrowed his eyes. “However, I should tell you that it is a long list, and your daughter’s blood type, Qa, is fairly uncommon, so finding a suitable donor will be difficult.”
Cobbler said nothing for a moment, but then he steepled his hooves, taking a deep breath. “How long does she… I mean, how long do we have to find one?”
“It’s difficult to say,” Dr. Umahara replied. “However, the most extreme case I have ever heard is a patient who lived to the age of thirty-one.”
“The ‘most extreme?’” Cobbler asked, sitting up. “How long do most patients live?”
“I… that is, most patients who fail to receive a new heart survive until anywhere between 15 and 25 years of age.”
Cobbler again began to feel dizzy. His eyes began to sting, but he held back his tears. “So, you’re saying that Georgia may only have a few more years to live?”
“We can slow her condition’s progress by keeping her calm,” he replied. “Lower her stress and excitement, reduce her physical strain, but… yes, unless we can find a donor, I’m afraid that there’s only so much we can do.”
“Reduce her physical strain?” he asked. “Dr. Umahara, she just got her cutie mark in horticulture yesterday. Today was her cutecañera! She loves digging in the dirt, planting trees and flowers… are you saying that she can’t do that any longer?”
Dr. Umahara shook his head. “She’ll have to limit it to very light work and get some help with the more strenuous things.”
Cobbler looked down. “I see. Tell me, Doctor, am I a match?” he asked. “Couldn’t you give her my heart?”
Dr. Umahara’s eyes widened. “Professor, you realize that would mean trading your life for hers,” he said.
Cobbler glanced up, meeting his gaze with stony eyes.
Dr. Umahara managed a smile. “You’re a very caring father, sir,” he said. “My wife and I recently had a foal ourselves, and I suppose I cannot blame you for that sentiment. But no, you are not a match, and even if you were, I could not go through with what you are suggesting.”
Cobbler heaved a sigh and got to his hooves once more. “I understand. Thank you for telling me, Doctor,” he said. “May I see my daughter now?”
Dr. Umahara stood as well and put his hoof on Cobbler’s shoulder. “Yes, of course,” he replied. “And I assure you that I will do everything in my power to care for your daughter.”
Cobbler’s lip quivered for a moment, and he suddenly embraced the doctor, crying on his shoulder in spite of himself.
“Please, Doctor… I’ve lost so much of my family already. Please don’t let my daughter die too,” he whispered.
Dr. Umahara patted him on the back. “I will do my best,” he said.

***

Twilight nodded solemnly. “I see,” she said. “I… I really can’t imagine what it must feel like to get news like that.”

Cobbler shook his head. “No, I suppose not,” he said. “If you’re fortunate, you never will.”

Twilight tapped her chin. “So, that Dr. Umahara,” she continued, “am I right in thinking that the foal he mentioned was the Umahara we met? The one sent to spy on us under the name ‘Fine Print?’”

“Yes, that’s correct,” Cobbler replied, nodding. “Our families became quite close, especially when I discovered that the Group had helped the Umaharas flee Neighpon. This was, of course, back before they began to open their borders. Equestria might not have wished to involve itself in smuggling ponies out of one country and into another, but the Group was keen on finding talented ponies who would then be sympathetic to what we were trying to achieve. We had quite a few scientists, but not many medical doctors in those days.”

“I see,” Twilight murmured. Then, frowning, she asked, “What did you tell Georgia when you found out about her condition?”

“I considered keeping it a secret for a moment or two,” he said, “but I decided she had a right to know about her own condition, and she had to know why she was going to have to restrict her physical activities. I remember…”

He paused, swallowing, but then he managed a smile.

“I remember seeing her in that hospital bed, looking so fragile, but then she looked up at me and smiled. And then how that smile faded when she saw my face. But she drew herself up and just asked, ‘What’s wrong with me, Daddy? You can tell me.’” He chuckled. “I could tell when I told her that she was afraid. And I could see the heartbreak in her eyes when I told her that she wouldn’t be able to dig around in the dirt like before, but just the same she never cried. She wanted to prove to me that she wasn’t a child any longer and that she could be brave.”

Twilight smiled. “It sounds like she was very brave, Cobbler,” she said.

“Yes… even though I knew she was afraid of what might happen to her if we couldn’t find a heart,” he said, “she still carried on, day after day, as though nothing had changed.”

Cobbler stood to pour a fresh cup of tea for himself and Twilight before resuming his seat.

“In spite of everything,” he said, resuming his story, “I tried to carry on my work. But I was dealt another blow when we attempted to reactivate the golem.”

Twilight frowned, leaning forward. “What happened?”

“It attacked the team,” he said, his gaze hard and stony, his voice quiet. “We had it in a massive, open room to accommodate its size. We’d learned that the symbol on its head once read ‘emet,’ the Yudacorn word for ‘truth,’ but by erasing the primary character and changing it to read ‘met,’ the word for ‘dead,’ the golem could be deactivated. We thought we could simply re-complete the word to reactivate it, but it was so ancient and in such disrepair that we had to restore many of its inner workings. We thought that we’d done everything right, and even supplied it with some modern wiring and power sources to replace the archaic alchemy and purely magical mechanisms.

“When we activated it, it stood to its full height, leaving us all in awe of its size and grandeur,” he said, raising his head at the memory. Then he frowned. “But once it spotted us, it immediately ran at us, attempting to crush or smash anything that got in its way. We had no choice but to remove the rune again. Luckily, I’d installed a remotely controlled device on its head that released a vial of liquid to smear it without any of us having to get close.”

Twilight swallowed. “Did it… I mean, was anypony…”

He shook his head. “Miraculously, no,” he said. “It injured a dozen of us, many of whom required medical treatment for months afterwards, but nopony was killed.”

Twilight sighed with relief. “I’m glad,” she said.

“You really do have a kind heart, Twilight,” Cobbler said, raising his teacup to her, as if in salute. “After so many years dealing with the project, to have it fail was a severe blow,” he said. Then he sneered. “We believe it was a result of the cognitive device in its head; the runes inscribed on those spherical layers formed a crude network of sorts, but it was too primitive, too brutish to be controlled. The Yudacorns must have been trying to create some sort of advanced, general-purpose automaton, but without a more organized foundation, the thing was like a wild animal. And so, ultimately, we had the cursed thing mothballed and put into storage deep within the caverns.”

Twilight frowned. “But that wasn’t the end of it, was it?” she asked. “You wouldn’t be telling me about all that if it wasn’t important. How does all this come together: the golem, your daughter, your grudge with Celestia, and Turing Test?”

Cobbler smirked. “Actually, Twilight, it wasn’t long after that failed experiment,” he said, “that the different parts of my story came together.

“You see, while the golem itself might have been flawed, the use of runes to create an independently-functioning ‘brain’ of sorts still fascinated many of us. And it was about that time that a new science began to emerge, courtesy of a certain griffon friend of yours.”

Twilight gasped. “Talon Turing?” She swallowed. “Please tell me he wasn’t involved--”

“No, no, nothing of the sort,” he said, shaking his head. “But the field of computer science that he was spearheading was catching on like wildfire. Many of the new recruits were fascinated with the possibility of thinking machines, and here we had this ancient construct that was just that! We simply began to apply the concepts of computer programming to the magical runes, and soon we had a new field unlike anything seen anywhere else in Equestria: runic computing.

“And since I was the foremost expert on the runes, I began to spearhead a project to create a new, more ordered system that would build the most incredible thinking machines the world had ever seen!”

He raised his head proudly, the excitement in his voice obvious as he recalled that age of discovery and innovation. But then his excitement began to die away.

“However,” he continued, “Georgia’s situation didn’t change at all. Every time I saw her move even close to a gallop, my heart felt like it would leap out of my chest. Every cough she gave sent shivers down my spine, and even when she was sleeping soundly, I would break into a cold sweat and place my hoof near her muzzle to make certain she was still breathing.

“And yet, after a few years, there was no sign that she was moving any closer to the top of the waiting list! And the more research I did on her condition, the more I realized how dire things really were: successful organ transplants are rare in ponies, Twilight, due to problems matching diverse blood types and the trouble with transporting donated organs in time.”

He swallowed. “I… I began to feel as though I was struggling against time itself,” he said, “and that I was being forced to watch my daughter slip away. No parent should ever have to go through that… I promised to protect her, always, but it seemed as though there was nothing I could do!

“Until, one night…”

***

17 years ago…
Cobbler and Cave Dweller were sitting in Cobbler’s office at the factory late one night. They had a decanter filled with peach brandy between them, and both had drunk more than their fair share of it that night.
“I’m telling ya, Cobbler,” Cave Dweller said, pounding his hoof on the meeting table for emphasis, “this runic computing stuff is gonna change the world!”
“So you’ve said,” Cobbler chuckled, taking another sip of brandy. “Quite a few times, I might add.”
“Well… it’s still true!” Cave Dweller said, jutting out his chin defiantly. “This machine we’re working on… we can encode a whole book’s worth of information on a runic disc the size of a vinyl record!” He held up his hooves very closely together to approximate what he meant with the exaggerated movement of a pony who’d obviously had a bit too much brandy.
Cobbler nodded. “Well, that’s the plan. I can’t imagine what those ancient ponies would think of how we’ve been utilizing this technology of theirs.”
“But still,” Cave Dweller said, “ya gotta give it to those Yudacorns. They came up with the idea for an artificial brain that actually worked 5000 years before anypony else came even close!”
“I don’t know if I’d say it ‘worked,’ exactly,” Cobbler scoffed. “The cursed thing was more trouble than it was worth.”
“Oh fine, so it didn’t work well, but at least it could move and react independently!” Cave Dweller shouted. “Makes you wonder what else they could’ve come up with.”
Cobbler smirked. “Perhaps a baldness cure?”
Cave made a sour face. “Sure, tease the pony with the thinning mane,” he said, rubbing the increasingly bare top of his head. “Hmm… still…”
Cobbler waited for him to continue, but the older pony just trailed off. “Still?” he asked, getting his attention.
Cave Dweller blinked, as though he’d momentarily forgotten what he was talking about. “Hm? Oh!” he said, regaining his focus. “I was just thinking that it’s kind of funny… that giant stone pony lasted 5000 years out there being buried in the desert and it still works; meanwhile, us flesh and blood ponies start falling apart in practically no time at all! We start losing our eyesight, our hair, bad ears, bad legs, bad ticker--”
He winced as soon as he said it, and Cobbler took on a sober look.
“Ah… h-hey, sorry about that, Cobbler,” Cave said, reaching over to pat his shoulder. “I didn’t mean to--”
“No, no,” Cobbler sighed, taking another big gulp of brandy. “You’re absolutely right. One might be justified in thinking that Mother Nature was a pretty shoddy craftsmare with all the things that can go wrong with a pony.” His eyes became glassy and he inhaled sharply.
Cave Dweller sat in silence, unsure what to do in the wake of Cobbler’s sudden somber mood.
“Ah… forgive me, my old friend,” Cobbler said, waving his hoof. “I see the brandy’s made me emotional. It’s late, and I really should return home, where Auntie will no doubt give me an earful.”
He stood and began to wobble, his head swimming, and he actually lost his footing and fell to the floor.
Cave Dweller almost went to his side, but then Cobbler began to laugh in the ridiculous, blissful way that only a drunk can, and Cave quickly joined in. The two stallions stayed that way for a while until Cave noticed that Cobbler had stopped laughing and was now muttering and appeared to be staring at something.
“My cutie mark,” Cobbler whispered.
“What, did you forget what it looked like?” Cave Dweller laughed.
“Shhh!” Cobbler hissed. He stared at the image on his own flank, suddenly transfixed.
A heart with a gear. A gear within a heart. A gear… a heart… a heart!
“That’s it!” he screamed, jumping to his hooves, his eyes wide but suddenly focused.
Cave Dweller watched him as he grabbed a piece of paper and, taking a pencil in his mouth, began to make a crude sketch with some notes.
“Uh, care to fill me in on this?” Cave asked.
“Look!” Cobbler shouted, shoving the sketch in his face.
Cave cocked his head to the side. “Um… not seeing it here,” he said. “Looks like… a pump? In the shape of a heart?”
“Exactly!” Cobbler laughed. “I just realized it… if the Yudacorns could create an artificial, mechanical brain for the golem, then why not create a mechanical heart?!”
Cave blinked. “Wait… an artificial heart?” he asked, rubbing his forehead. “You’re saying you want to build one?”
“We’ve discovered that the runes hold startling amounts of information,” he said, “enough to represent sections of the brain for the golem. It should be a simple enough task to use runes that contain the information necessary to make an artificial heart beat! With an outside power source, why, a creation of metal or rubber or plastic could beat for decades! Georgia would have no need to wait for an organ donation!”
He began to laugh deliriously and swept up Cave in an embrace.
“I can do it!” he shouted. “I can build her a new heart! I can save her, Cave, I can save her!”
“Ha! Cobbler, you’re crazier than almost anypony else I know,” Cave Dweller said, prying himself loose. But then he clapped Cobbler on the back. “Still, that’s why I like you. You remind me of myself when I was young! All right, I’ll support you, but you’ll need to do a whole mess of research to make this work.”
Cobbler smirked. “Then there’s no time to waste,” he said. “Call Dr. Umahara and tell him he’s about to help me make history!”

***

“A mechanical heart,” Twilight breathed. “That’s…”

Cobbler watched her carefully.

“...brilliant!” she cried, her eyes growing wide. “That kind of invention could save so many lives all across Equestria!”

“And yet,” Cobbler said, raising an eyebrow, “you’ve never heard of such an invention, have you? Now, why do you suppose that is?”

Twilight scrunched her face up, tapping her chin. “I can’t imagine why,” she said. “Unless it didn’t work or somepony stopped… it…”

She froze, the realization coming swiftly.

“Nearly two whole years of study,” Cobbler said, “of collaboration between Dr. Umahara and myself, combining the fields of medical science and mechanical engineering in a way never thought possible! Soon we had our prototype: Equestria’s first artificial heart! This was an idea that we couldn’t keep to the Group, however; we needed to put it through official medical trials to test it and share our discovery with all ponykind everywhere. And so, we sent our schematics and our proposal to the Royal Ministry of Science and Technology and also the Ministry of Public Health. After a few months, we got our response…”

To be continued…

Author's Notes:

Next time, Cobbler fights for his invention and his daughter's life while runic computing takes on a new life...

References:

-Burning Bones, Cobbler's musically-inclined orchard worker, is named after Ben Bernie, one of the author's of "Sweet Georgia Brown," and Brother Bones, who composed one of the most well-known versions of the song.

-"Sweet Georgia Peach" is a parody of "Sweet Georgia Brown." The song is well known as the theme of the Harlem Globetrotters, though it does have a vocal version, which is the basis of the song Cobbler and Georgia sing. This also references the fact that one of Georgia's potential names was "Georgia Brown."

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=opmwfRqdGsg

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5SaFp_I7-N4

-Dr. Umahara's first name, "Dosanko," is the name of a kind of Japanese horse found in Hokkaido.

-Less a reference and more a fun fact, but horse blood types really are more complex than those of humans. For starters, they have 8. And, in a sense, they can have more than one type. More information can be found here.

-The Umahara family fleeing Neighpon during a period of isolationism references Japan's real life isolationist policies that continued into the late 19th century before Commodore Matthew Perry (no, not that other one) of the USA forcibly compelled them to open up to trade. (Neighpon's opening up was considerably more amicable.)

That should be about it. See you next time (hopefully in just about a week!) for the conclusion of Cobbler's tale.

Shelter, Part 3

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15 years ago...
“...out came the sun an’ dried up all the rain…”
Georgia Peach was singing in the den to the little blue unicorn colt she was babysitting while Cobbler and Auntie Bellum sat nearby, only partially paying attention to the books they were reading as a phonograph softly played some folk music.
“...’an the itsy bitsy spider, went up that spout again!” Georgia continued, suddenly holding up the ringlets of her mane and pretending they were the spiders’ legs. The little colt laughed with delight, and Georgia joined in.
“Again!” the colt exclaimed. “Aga--” He was interrupted by a prodigious yawn.
“My my my!” Georgia exclaimed, holding up a hoof to her mouth. “Such a big yawn! Why, I simply cannot believe that your daddy hasn’t come to get you yet!”
“Probably still helpin’ sick ponies at the hospital,” Auntie Bellum said. “But maybe you best put that young ‘un to bed, precious.”
“No!” the colt squealed, crossing his forelegs as he began to pout.
“Aw, don’t fuss like that, Champ,” Georgia said, nuzzling him and causing him to break out into giggles again. “I’ll tuck you into my bed an’ read you a story an’ you can sleep there until your daddy comes.”
Champ Umahara, age five, frowned, but gave a nod, relenting. Then he raised his forelegs and shouted, “Carry me!”
“Ask like a gentlecolt,” she said, standing up straight, jutting out her chin stiffly.
“Please?” he asked.
“Well, since you asked nicely,” she said, and hoisted him onto her back before taking him over to the stairs.
“N-now don’t strain yourself, Georgia,” Cobbler said, sitting up from his chair.
She shot him a look, narrowing her eyes. “Daddy, please. I may not have the strongest constitution, but I surely think even I can carry a little bitty colt up a single flight of stairs!”
Cobbler chuckled nervously. “Ah… yes, of course,” he said. “Good night, Champ!” he said to the colt.
“G’night, Professor Cobbler! G’night, Auntie!” Champ said, waving to them as Georgia carried him off.
Then, when he was almost out of earshot, Cobbler heard him say: “Georgia, when we’re both grown-ups, can I marry you?”
And his heart nearly broke at the pregnant pause that hung in the air before Georgia quietly replied, “We’ll see.”
Auntie Bellum, noticing the look on his face, shut her book. “Nephew, you mustn’t dwell on it…”
“As if I could just choose to do so,” Cobbler growled. Then he took a deep breath. “No matter. Any day now, we’ll get word from Canterlot.”
Only a few minutes later, there was a pounding at the front door. The help was all gone for the evening, so Cobbler answered it himself and saw Dr. Umahara standing there. The middle-aged doctor adjusted his spectacles and tried to catch his breath.
“Professor!” he said, holding up a slip of paper in his magic. “I’m so sorry! I received this telegram early today, but I was in surgery for hours. I just read it! It’s from Canterlot!”
Cobbler stiffened, his lips parting slightly in anticipation of the answer.
“They’re refusing to allow a trial!”
Cobbler froze for a moment. Then he grit his teeth, and his rage boiled over. “What?!” he bellowed, snatching the telegram from Dr. Umahara. He read it and, his face purpling with rage, he suddenly kicked out, knocking over a flower stand, smashing the vase atop it. “Those dim-witted Canterlot fools! No follow-up questions, no schedule for a planning meeting?! Just ‘no?!’ To one of the greatest potential breakthroughs in medical history?!”
“What in the name of peaches an’ cream is goin’ on down here?” Georgia Peach shouted, appearing at the top of the stairs, her eyes ablaze. “Champ was just about to fall asleep when… w-when…”
She wobbled a little, and Cobbler ran up to try and catch her.
But Georgia caught herself on the railing, patting her chest lightly with her free hoof as she sat on the steps. “I’m all right, Daddy,” she assured him. “I apologize; you just startled me so.”
“Yes, yes, I’m sorry too,” he said. “It’s just… I cannot believe--”
“What breakthrough?” she asked.
Dr. Umahara gasped. “You never told her?”
Georgia raised an eyebrow, peering close at her father. “Never told me what, exactly?”
Cobbler sighed. All this time, he’d kept his plans for an artificial heart a secret, not wanting to give her false hope. But now that he and Dr. Umahara (with a lot of help from the Group) had a functioning model, all that remained was to test and perfect it. Cornered, he had no reason not to tell Georgia, save for the fear that she would say no, and so he explained to her all about the mechanical heart, how it would work, and their hopes to save her regardless of getting a transplant.
“So,” Georgia said, “you… all these nights that you were off working on this project of yours… it was to build a new heart? For me?”
Cobbler nodded solemnly, turning from her. “I… I truly didn’t mean to neglect you lately, sweetheart. I just--”
He felt her throw her forelegs around his neck. “Oh, Daddy!” she cried, her voice breaking. “I declare, you truly are the most wonderful, kindest pony in all Equestria! Do you really think it will work?”
Cobbler hugged her back, holding back his tears. “I don’t know,” he said. “But… but I’m going to find out.”
He drew back from Georgia, giving her a warm smile. “I’ll do whatever it takes to keep you here with me,” he said. Then, turning to Dr. Umahara, who was looking up the stairs at the two of them, he pointed a hoof and said “Dr. Umahara, pack your bags! If the ministers are deaf to our appeals, then we’ll take this directly to the highest authority in the land!”
Dr. Umahara’s eyes bulged. “You mean…”
“Correct!” Cobbler shouted. “We’re going to see Princess Celestia in person!”
***
The room, and the long table at the center of it, were both larger than they needed to be. At one end of the table, dressed as finely as they could be, armed with stacks of documents and schematics and photographs, stood Cobbler and Dr. Umahara.
At the other end were three ponies. On the left stood the Minister of Science and Technology, Noble Gas, a lavender unicorn stallion with a frizzy mane and lacey overcoat. On the right was Medicine Hat, the Minister of Public Health, a yellow unicorn mare with an olive-green mane in a tight bun.
And in the center, at the head of the table in all her glory, sat Princess Celestia, her majestic mane flowing as she wore a serene smile.
“Gentlecolts,” Celestia said, standing to greet them and giving a nod of her head, “I’m glad to meet you.”
Dr. Umahara nearly froze, suddenly in awe of the majestic alicorn, the ruler of all Equestria, standing before him.
Cobbler had no such reaction. “Thank you, Your Highness,” he said quickly, bowing to her before he took his place. “I appreciate you seeing me.”
“You should be appreciative,” Noble Gas said, his lips tight, and his expression looking like he’d just tasted some sour milk. “For the last three days you’ve been causing quite a ruckus, demanding an audience with Her Highness to appeal this decision--”
“Forgive me, but we don’t have time for this,” Cobbler said, holding up a hoof. “If you wish to upbraid me, then feel free to do so later. I am here, Your Majesty, to request legal clearance to conduct medical testing on my invention, co-created with Dr. Umahara’s help.”
Dr. Umahara seemed to come out of his mental fog when Cobbler mentioned his name, and he bowed. “Th-that is correct, Your Majesty.”
Celestia nodded, paying no attention to Noble Gas, who was still smoldering quietly beside her. “I see,” she said. “My ministers have told me a little bit about this invention of yours, but I admit they were scant on the details.”
“In all honesty, we thought it was some sort of joke, Your Majesty!” Noble Gas laughed.
He fell silent when nopony else did.
“I took it a bit more seriously,” Medicine Hat said, “but I found it to be unsuitable for medical trials, so I also rejected it.”
Celestia narrowed her eyes. “Then… what is this invention, Professor Cobbler?” she asked, looking back to him.
He began to take out all the papers, but decided that the best way to make her understand was to take the direct approach. Among the papers was a small box. He undid the latch and lifted the lid, bringing it over Celestia and the ministers.
Inside, composed of metal and plastic tubing, but still recognizable by its shape, was the mechanical heart prototype.
Celestia gasped, and Noble Gas flinched.
“This is the first functional prototype of an artificial, mechanical heart,” Cobbler said. “With proper work, this little machine can replace the malfunctioning heart of a normal pony and allow them to live a normal life. This could save the lives of hundreds, perhaps thousands of ponies over the years who will die without a proper heart transplant. Denying it for testing, dismissing it as a joke is utterly inane.”
Noble Gas puffed himself up and was about to speak, but Celestia raised a wing, motioning for silence.
“I see,” she said, staring down at the device uneasily. “I agree that it isn’t a joke, and saving ponies’ lives is something we all desire, but… you truly think this machine could replace a pony’s very heart?”
Well, she didn’t outright dismiss it, Cobbler thought to himself. That’s encouraging. Still, I wish Cave Dweller were here right now; he’s still the better salespony between us.
“We have painstakingly recreated the chambers of the heart, the ventricles, and done so with a means of making the device beat as a normal heart would,” he said. “Dr. Umahara here is an expert cardiologist and he can tell you the same.”
Dr. Umahara again stammered, “T-that is correct, Your Majesty.”
Cobbler wrinkled his muzzle, irritated at the way Dr. Umahara was freezing up. “Would you mind explaining a bit more about how the device mimics the heart’s function?” he asked, urging him to elaborate.
“Ah… ah, yes!” Dr. Umahara said, coming to life now that he was on more familiar ground. He held the artificial heart aloft in his magic. “You see, Your Majesty, this device is more than a simplistic pump. In order to recreate the functions of the heart…”
Celestia nodded, listening intently as Dr. Umahara explained it as succinctly and accurately as possible.
“I see now,” she said, smiling at him. “Thank you, doctor. That explains it very well.”
Dr. Umahara blushed, stepping back to let Cobbler take the lead.
“I believe you can see that we are quite serious, Princess Celestia,” Cobbler said. “All that remains is for you to approve some trials, and we can manufacture as many as are needed.”
Then Medicine Hat cleared her throat. “I’m afraid the issue is more complicated,” she said.
“Oh yes, quite a bit more complicated!” Noble Gas added with a smirk.
Celestia looked from one to the other. “Explain,” she said simply.
“Professor Cobbler, Dr. Umahara… nothing like this artificial heart has ever been created,” Medicine Hat said, “and yet you are intending for it to replace a complex biological organ. What are the odds of prolonged survival for our first trial recipient?”
Cobbler and Dr. Umahara exchanged glances. “I couldn’t say,” Cobbler replied.
Dr. Umahara pushed his glasses up his muzzle. “In all honesty,” he added, “there are so many factors we can’t anticipate. There is a good chance that the recipient could die.”
“Then these early trials,” Medicine Hat said, “would likely be the equivalent of a death sentence.”
Celestia furrowed her brow at that.
“Yes, perhaps,” Cobbler said, quickly adding, “but the potential gains from what we might learn could be invaluable!”
“That’s easy to say when it’s not your family,” Medicine Hat said, meeting his eyes. “What would you say to using your daughter as the first test subject?”
Cobbler glared at her.
“Your… daughter?” Celestia asked.
They didn’t even brief her about that?! Cobbler screamed internally. Aloud, he said, quietly, “My daughter has a heart condition. I’m not certain how much more time she has. She’s on the waiting list, but finding a suitable donor may take too long!” He bowed his head. “I’m simply trying to save my daughter’s life.”
Celestia’s gaze softened. Medicine Hat and Noble Gas’s expressions, however, did not.
“That is part of the problem,” Medicine Hat said. “Your zeal to cure your daughter’s condition may cause you to cut corners. For instance, your proposal is to test your invention not only on the most desperate ponies who are near to death, but on patients who may have a few years left.”
“A patient who could easily die due to complications would yield too little useful data,” Cobbler said. “I’m proposing candidates who are relatively healthy but otherwise unable to receive a transplant.”
“And potentially robbing them of their remaining years with their families.”
“Or giving them back decades!” Cobbler shot back. “Why not let them take that chance for themselves?”
“Desperate ponies make desperate - and unsound - decisions,” Medicine Hat said, shaking her head. “Case in point: you do not have the patience to deal with setback after setback, or else you would accept trials on only the sickest, most hopeless patients. How many ponies will have to sacrifice themselves to rescue your daughter? What’s happening to her is terrible, but we don’t trade one life for another.”
Noble Gas cleared his throat. “Cobbler’s family is actually more interwoven into this issue than you realize, Your Majesty,” he added, raising an eyebrow as he looked at Cobbler with suspicion. “According to our information, he is the grandson of an automaton builder named Dearborn Crumble.”
Celestia jerked her head back in surprise. “You mean the pony who--”
“--Invented the farming automaton over eighty years ago?” he asked smugly. “Indeed I do.”
Cobbler grit his teeth, but tried to keep calm. “That is true,” he said. “My grandfather was, like me, an inventor and mechanical engineer. I wasn’t aware it was a secret.”
“It isn’t,” Noble Gas continued, taking a few notes from inside of his suit and reading from them. “It’s also no secret that your father was known to curse Her Majesty, blaming her for the failure of his father’s invention. Some might even accuse him of being disloyal.”
“Sir,” Cobbler said, his voice quiet, but with an audible edge, “I don’t know how things are done here in Canterlot, but in Mustangia, one does not throw around insults aimed at another pony’s family members lightly.”
“Was that a threat?” Noble Gas asked.
“It was a fact,” Cobbler said. Then he drew himself up, taking a deep breath. “Besides, I really don’t see what my family’s history has to do with this.”
“Then allow me to explain,” Noble Gas said, turning to Celestia, who was watching all this with an increasingly worried expression on her face. “Professor Cobbler here is still quite the automaton enthusiast and known to employ the latest in automation technologies at his businesses, thus reducing the need for normal, living ponies to fill such positions.”
“But those that do fill them,” Cobbler said, interjecting, “are paid generously for their work.”
“It must be easy to give high salaries when you have far fewer workers under you,” Noble said, polishing his hoof. “The point is, however, that you have been raised to resent Princess Celestia’s… influence in your grandfather’s downfall, and it’s clear you hold the advance of technology in greater importance than the needs of others.”
“That’s--”
“The truth is that this ‘mechanical heart’ is part of a greater philosophy: soon Professor Cobbler, promising health and longevity to all ponies everywhere - minus the ones who die to test his invention, as Medicine Hat pointed out - will be selling them to every single pony, regardless of need, all in the name of efficiency. Then it’ll be newer prosthetics… artificial eyes, artificial ears, then lungs, then mechanical legs! Soon, if this pony has his way, he’ll achieve his grandfather’s dream of a legion of automata by replacing the ponies of Equestria piece-by-piece until ponies as we know them now are completely extinct!”
“Shut up, you pompous simpleton!” Cobbler bellowed, slamming his hooves on the meeting table. “I’m not some mad scientist in whatever pulp fiction you’ve been reading; I’m doing this to help ponies! Yes, that includes my own daughter, but I’m only doing what any good father in my position would!”
“Then you admit,” Noble Gas said, raising an eyebrow, “that you don’t still hold to the ideals of automaton advancement? You admit that your grandfather was wrong?”
“My grandfather was most certainly not wrong!” Cobbler shouted, now screaming into Noble Gas’s face. “Those machines would have revolutionized the country, and instead we’ve wasted nearly a century on archaic techniques thanks to the widespread technophobia brought on by small mindedness!”
“Cobbler!” Dr. Umahara yelled, seizing him by the shoulders.
Cobbler suddenly realized what he said and froze. Numbly, he turned to see Celestia watching him. There was a look in her eyes. It was tense. Almost fearful.
“Professor,” Celestia said slowly, “I… I’m not certain what to say about all this.”
Cobbler bowed his head. “Forgive me, Your Highness,” he said, trying to calm himself down. “I meant no disrespect--”
“I think he did,” Noble Gas said, sneering at him.
“I’m inclined to agree,” Medicine Hat quipped.
Celestia raised her hoof again, silencing everypony else.
“Professor Cobbler Mustang,” she began, spreading her wings as she addressed him, making him feel as though he were a criminal about to be sentenced. “Your invention truly does have a lot of potential. And I am truly sorry to hear about your daughter. I believe you want to help her above all else.”
Cobbler nodded, raising his head hopefully.
“However… this invention raises so many questions. Replacing ponies, even parts of them, is still one of my greatest fears. To think that one day such things may become commonplace, changing the very experience of what it means to be a pony… I admit that I find it disturbing. And whether or not you intend any harm, you are far too close to this matter personally to conduct a study objectively. I will not allow other ponies to die due to your desperation to test this invention quickly, and I’m certain that’s what you would do.”
“So,” Cobbler surmised, “your answer is no.”
“Partly,” she said, bowing her head. “As much as I wish to save ponies’ lives, you are far too eager to push this invention. I will allow you to publish your findings and theories, and I will, in fact, allow a trial to be conducted on ponies who have no more time or options. However, I will not allow you or Dr. Umahara to participate in the study due to your bias. I will instead allow my capable ministers to conduct this trial with the utmost care.”
She nodded to Medicine Hat and Noble Gas, who both bowed to her.
“A fair and wise decision, Your Majesty,” Noble Gas said.
Cobbler stood aghast, his mouth hanging open. “You would shove me aside,” he breathed, “while these two imbeciles tinker with an invention neither of them have the slightest faith in?!”
“If you wish for your invention to ever succeed, then yes,” Medicine Hat replied, adjusting her glasses.
“It seems we’re all you’ve got,” Noble Gas said, forcing himself to smile.
“But, Your Majesty,” Cobbler cried, turning back to Celestia, “with such test subjects and these two no doubt waiting to kill my invention on the vine, we’ll never gain enough knowledge to help Georgia in time!”
“You don’t know that,” Celestia replied, placing her hoof on Cobbler’s shoulder. “Please, Professor… such innovation must be handled slowly and with the greatest caution.”
Cobbler glared at her, his body trembling with rage as he shrugged her hoof from his shoulder. “I thought perhaps I was wrong about you,” he muttered. “I thought that you would be more understanding than my granddaddy led me to believe. You had the chance here to correct the mistake you made with him all those years ago, but you’ve thrown it away.”
Celestia narrowed her eyes. “What I did, I did for the continued happiness of ponies,” she said darkly. “Technology is a power unlike any other. The sudden, exponential advancement of it around the time of your grandfather showed me that such power must be closely watched and restrained. In all the centuries I’ve lived, I’ve realized that once our society changes, it can never be returned to how it once was. Ushering in an age of mechanical ponies would have meant accepting all the unforeseen consequences of it. As the ruler of Equestria, it is my duty to weigh the consequences and to slow the introduction of any potentially dangerous precedents. Towards that end, I’ve chosen advisors to help guide me in a way that will minimize technology’s potential harm.
“I am sorry that you’re still embittered by my lack of support for your grandfather’s invention, but it wasn’t a mistake.”
“Oh, it was just one of many mistakes, Celestia,” he said. “It isn’t that the citizens of Equestria aren’t ready for this machine; it’s that you aren’t, and they all blindly worship you too much to make up their own minds. And now I see why you appointed these two peons: to validate your own ignorance and fear.”
Celestia shook her head, heaving a sigh. “I wish you could understand, Professor,” she said.
“I think I understand perfectly well. You just won’t accept that ponies should be given the ability to make their own decisions,” Cobbler said, scoffing. “You are simply too afraid that they’ll choose progress over stagnation. You’re no leader; you’re just acting as Equestria’s caretaker, trying to shelter your little ponies from the specter of a world that has advanced beyond its need for you and your outdated ways!”
“How dare you!” Noble Gas shouted, pointing his hoof at the door. “Nopony talks that way to Her Highness! Guards!”
“Don’t bother; we’ll see ourselves out,” Cobbler said, gathering up his things as Dr. Umahara, scrunching inwardly, fell in next to him. They walked toward the exit as the tense guards held the doors open. “Just know,” Cobbler added, pausing to turn around and look at Celestia, “that you might have sentenced an innocent filly to death. You remember that, because I assure you that I will never forget it.”
As he went out, Celestia cried, “Cobbler, wait! Perhaps there’s--”
But he’d already taken off, shrugging off the guards as he dashed down the hall, back through the palace corridors and outside the castle.
Dr. Umahara finally caught up to him, breathing heavily as he gently laid his hoof on Cobbler’s shoulder.
“Professor,” he said, “I’m sorry, but I…”
He trailed off when Cobbler turned to face him. He had tears in his eyes.
“Dosanko,” Cobbler whimpered, surprising Dr. Umahara with his first name, “I… I failed. Without medical testing, the heart may fail! But the chances of Georgia getting a heart in time are…”
In spite of himself, seeing all the other ponies passing by and staring at the grown stallion weeping on the great steps of the Royal Palace, Dr. Umahara embraced his friend, patting him gently on the back as he comforted him.
“Don’t worry, Cobbler,” he said. “I… perhaps we can find another solution. But it will be all right. You did your best to make your case, but those fools were determined to sway Her Majesty’s opinion against you.”
Cobbler paused, taking a breath. “No,” he muttered. “She knew exactly what she was doing. Those two were just there to make her feel better about it. And even if not, a ruler who listens to fools may as well be a fool herself.”
He got to his hooves and began to stride down the stairs, his features hard and determined.
“Let’s go home,” he said. “This place makes me sick.”

***

Twilight stared down into her teacup, absorbing what Cobbler had just told her.

“Surprised?” Cobbler asked, smirking as he got up to refill the teakettle. “I can already tell what you’re thinking. You could understand your mentor holding back the farming automaton, but the artificial heart is something else entirely. Being a student of science yourself, you can’t believe she’d hold back such an invention. You’re wondering if I’ve lied to you, but I swear to you that what I’ve said is the absolute truth.”

“I…” Twilight paused, taking a deep breath, calming herself down. In fact, she had been wondering all those things. But still, it couldn’t all be so simple.

“It wasn’t all her fault,” Twilight said, turning to face him. “It was those ministers who--”

“The ministers she appointed, and she chose to listen to,” Cobbler said, shaking his head. “If she’s the one who makes the decision, then she bears the responsibility.”

Twilight sighed. It was hard to argue with his logic. The ministers and the noble families in Canterlot were known to be a disconnected, elitist lot. She’d sat in on a meeting with Celestia once, and she’d mostly found the ministers to be a squabbling group of bureaucrats, but with Celestia leading them, she’d been satisfied that they were being directed toward loftier goals.

She didn’t know either Noble Gas or Medicine Hat, however. She suspected they’d since stepped down from their positions.

Cobbler cleared his throat and held up the teakettle, offering her more tea.

“Thank you,” she said, letting him pour her another cup. “Listen, I sympathize with what you’re saying, but I need to know the whole story. I need to hear how it ends.”

Cobbler nodded. “I thought you might,” he said, taking his seat again. “Unfortunately, it turns out that Medicine Hat was right: desperate ponies make desperate decisions…”

***

Late that same evening, Cobbler and Dr. Umahara wearily stepped from the train and onto the platform in Mustangia Station.
“She said no, didn’t she?”
They both turned swiftly at the voice. There stood Cave Dweller, a humorless smile on his face.
Dr. Umahara bowed. “She did,” he replied dejectedly.
Cobbler grit his teeth. “Those braindead Canterlot--”
“Yep, I thought as much,” Cave said, then stepped between the pair of them, draping his forelegs over both of their shoulders. “But that’s why we’re the pioneers of this brave new world! You think those bureaucrats did anything practical? They didn’t delve into the oceans, storm the beaches, or bring back the gold! No sir, we did! It’s just us against the world, gentlecolts!”
Cobbler raised an eyebrow but had to chuckle. “You’re nutty as a fruitcake, Cave,” he said. “But all right, I’ll bite, what’s the point?”
“The point is that if we want to save your daughter, and I know we all do,” he said, “then we’re gonna have to think outside the box! Try new things! Like my watch!”
“Your… what?” Cobbler asked.
Cave held up his forehoof and displayed his watch, which, they noticed, had hands that were glowing bright green in the evening darkness.
“Oh, um… it’s very nice,” Dr. Umahara said politely, trying to smile. “Is it enchanted with magic?”
“Nope! Lab boys are working with this energetic new material called ‘radium.’ I’m puttin’ it in everything from watches to paint to toothpaste for a brighter, healthier smile!”
Cobbler blinked at him. “Why?”
“‘Why?’ Science isn’t about ‘why,’ it’s about ‘why not!’” Cave scoffed. “I figure all this stuff is so energetic, it’s gotta be healthy. Heck, if I’m lucky, maybe it’ll turn me into an alicorn! How do ya like that thought? First president of the Nation, first earth pony to grow wings and a horn!”

“Wait, wait, wait,” Twilight said, holding up her hooves. “Didn’t they discover a few years ago that radium is--”

“Yes, yes,” Cobbler said, rolling his eyes. “Let’s just say that Cave grew some things, but wings and a horn weren’t among them. Now don’t interrupt…”

“The point is,” Cave went on, “that we need to do something a little drastic.”
Here he took on a sly demeanor and beckoned his two comrades to follow him from the train station. Once they were on the darkened country road leading back toward Cobbler’s mansion, he began to explain again in a hushed tone.
“I know a guy,” he said, “who owns a hog farm. Big, smelly place, but he makes a darn good living on fertilizer, renting ‘em out to truffle farmers, and when they croak he sells ‘em to pet food companies.”
Cobbler sighed. “What exactly is your point?”
“I’m just saying,” he said, “that, if you think about it, hogs aren’t that different from ponies. Four hooves, warm blooded mammals, around the same size…”
Dr. Umahara and Cobbler exchanged confused glances.
“Oh for the love of… they probably have similar organs too. Like, say… hearts?”
Cobbler’s eyes widened.
Dr. Umahara froze in his tracks. “You… you’re proposing animal testing?”
“Well, I could try tracking down some hoboes and offering them some bits to let us tinker with their tickers instead--”
“Cave!” Dr. Umahara cried.
“No, huh? Well, then it’s back to the piggies,” Cave said.
“But animal testing has been illegal for… well, generations!” Dr. Umahara shouted. “Even in Neighpon, such actions would have been forbidden!”
“Oh come on, it’s not like we haven’t broken the law before,” he chuckled. “Or did you think this secret organization conducting unsupervised experiments as an independent nation was A-OK with Canterlot?”
“Shh!” Cobbler hissed, looking around nervously. “Try not to tell the whole countryside, if you don’t mind?”
“Look, while you’re arguing petty ethics for animals whose whole purpose in life is mostly to eat garbage and poop,” Cave said, poking Dr. Umahara in the chest, “a sweet little girl is getting closer and closer to death’s door because Mother Nature botched her original heart. Now, I ask you, what’s the difference between this and asking actual ponies to take a gamble on a medical trial?”
“Ponies can offer consent,” Dr. Umahara said, shaking his head. “Animals cannot.”
“Well, they can’t say no, either, so that’s--”
“Enough,” Cobbler said, silencing them both with a single word.
They both looked at him. He suddenly looked older, weighed down by his burdens.
“Cave is right,” he said. “Much as I find the idea somewhat revolting, no animal’s life is worth that of my daughter. But we cannot do it without you, my friend.” He took hold of Dr. Umahara’s hoof and looked him in the eye. “Say you’ll help me. If not me, then do it for my daughter. Please.”
Dr. Umahara opened his mouth to say something, but then his resistance melted away. He slumped and only gave a silent nod.
“Ha!” Cave laughed, slapping Dr. Umahara on the shoulder. “That’s the spirit! Okay, you two geniuses do what you need to do, and we’ll start testing some piggies!”

***

Twilight was still staring at Cobbler, a horrified expression on her face.

“Animal testing?!” she cried. “That’s monstrous!”

“I know,” he said, frowning. “It was. But, as Cave said, my daughter’s life was worth more than those poor creatures’. And I will not lie to you… there were quite a few of them.

“The first died outright in surgery. We had to fight to get Dr. Umahara to try again, even though he’d only been trained to operate on ponies. But he gave in, and we tested on the next, who lived 48 hours before a leak in the ventricle lock was discovered. The next lived a week. Then another lived ten days. Bit by bit, we improved on our designs, learning how to create the perfect heart to replace a pony’s.

“And during that time, my dear Georgia, without me noticing, was changing from a young filly to a mare…”

***

13 years ago...
“Um… Daddy?”
Cobbler looked up from his schematics and turned to look at the door to his study. Georgia, now 17 years old, was standing there. One leg was crossed in front of the other, and she wasn’t meeting his eyes, which was a sure sign that she was about to ask for something.
“I know that look,” he said, getting up from his desk. “What do you want?”
“Oh, well, um… it won’t cost you anything!” she said, smiling at him.
“That’s nice, but it doesn’t quite answer my question,” he said, leaning close to her. “Now go on and tell me.”
“Well, Daddy,” Georgia said, her cheeks reddening, “there’s a school dance coming up, an’ I would just love to go.”
Cobbler’s expression grew tense.
“And, um… I’ve been invited to go with Dandy Fine,” she added, her voice squeaking as she glanced up at him.
Cobbler took a step back before collapsing into his office chair. “You… Georgia, I mean… are you saying he asked you on a date?”
“W-well, I suppose you might say that,” she replied, chuckling nervously.
“But… a date with a colt?” he said, rubbing his forehead. “Why, aren’t you a little young for that?”
She puffed her cheeks out. “Why, I am seventeen! I am practically a lady!”
“Practically but not quite,” Cobbler said.
“I will have you know that quite a few of the other girls in my class have been dating for a few years now!” she declared, stomping her hoof.
“That’s fine well and good for some,” he said, rolling his eyes, “but in this family we have a bit more class--”
“When did you first date a filly?” she asked, raising an eyebrow.
He flashed back to asking out a filly to a dance at fifteen to the objection of absolutely nopony in the family.
“That… it doesn’t matter, we’re talking about you, young lady!”
“Oh, so I am a ‘lady?’”
He winced. She only smiled.
“Georgia,” he whispered, “you… you can’t.”
Her smile vanished. “And why not?” she demanded, raising her voice. “Why, if it’s about me spending time with a boy, then you needn’t worry.” Her eyes grew dreamy. “That Dandy Fine is just the kindest, sweetest gentlecolt in Mustangia! Oh, an’ he’s so handsome an’ he helps me carry my books--”
“Georgia, it’s not the boy!” Cobbler exclaimed (which was partly true). “The problem is… your condition.”
She blinked, then frowned at him. “I see,” she said quietly.
“Georgia, please understand,” he sighed. “With your heart, I just don’t know if you could take so much excitement. Now, perhaps one day when you’re older--”
“Assuming I get much older, you mean.”
Cobbler froze. “Georgia,” he whispered. “Don’t speak like that.”
“Well, why not?!” she shouted, glaring at him. “It isn’t as though it’s a secret! An’ you an’ Auntie are always watching me an’ keeping me here like some precious, fragile porcelain doll! Y’all won’t even let me go out to the garden without half a dozen farmhooves to help me plant my things! An’ the last time that happened was nearly a year ago!”
“Georgia--”
“I am not finished!” she screamed. “I know I may not have much time left! That’s why I want to go to this dance! It’s just one little bitty dance, an’ you won’t even let me do that! If it is so fated that I go to my grave early, I don’t want to be on my deathbed an’ wonder what it feels like to have a wonderful romance or to kiss a boy or dance with my friends until I’m dizzy! I know you want to keep me alive, but I just want to live!”
She screamed that final word, bursting into tears. He reached for her, but she’d already dashed out of the room and down the hall.
Momentarily flabbergasted, Cobbler was too stunned to speak or even move. But then he stood and ran out of his study.
Auntie Bellum was in the hall, blocking his path.
“Nephew,” she said, heaving a sigh, “she’s right.”
“I… I was trying to…”
She went over to him and hugged him. “I know, precious,” she said, patting him on the back. “I know you’ve endured a whole mess o’ heartbreak, an’ I surely don’t want to see you fret any further, but our baby girl ain’t a ‘baby’ anymore. Now, if you forbid her from this dance, she’ll get over it eventually… but I suggest you let her have some happiness. Goodness knows, sometimes life ain’t kind enough to provide us with much.”
Cobbler smiled. “You always know just what to say, Auntie,” he said, kissing her on the forehead. “All right. I’ll talk to her.”
He went to the stairs and ascended, arriving at Georgia’s bedroom door. He knocked on it.
“Go away!” she shouted.
He turned the knob anyway, finding the door unlocked, and walked in. Georgia was on her bed, crying her eyes out.
He sat down on the bed next to her.
“When is this dance?” he asked quietly.
She didn’t look at him, but kept her face pressed into her pillow. “It’s in three days,” she replied. “Why?”
“Well,” he sighed, patting her on the shoulder, “that gives us a few days to find you a nice new dress.”
She sat up, staring at him through tear-stained eyes. “You… you mean…?”
“Georgia Peach,” he said, shaking his head as he laughed, “I know when I am beat. Just have a good time, don’t overexert yourself, and don’t let that boy get fresh, all right?”
Her lip quivered for a moment before she threw her forelegs around him, laughing ecstatically. “Oh, thank you, Daddy! You really are the kindest, most wonderful--”
“Oh stop,” he said, poking her in the muzzle playfully. “You already got what you wanted, so stop trying to butter me up. Just be home by eight.”
“Ten.”
“Nine.”
“Nine thirty.”
“Done,” he said, smirking at her. “Always negotiating, eh? That’s a businesspony’s daughter for you.”
He nuzzled her, causing her to giggle, and then turned serious. “Georgia… I know I shelter you sometimes. But just know that I only do it because--”
She placed a hoof to his lips. “I know, Daddy,” she said. “I love you too.”

***

Twilight smiled. “That’s a really cute story,” she said. Then her expression changed from a look of happiness to one of horror. “Wait. Don’t tell me that because of that dance she--”

“Oh, she was fine!” Cobbler exclaimed, rolling his eyes. “She came home humming to herself, spinning around in circles, and drawing little hearts on everything she could put a pen or pencil to.”

Twilight let out a sigh of relief.

“If nothing else,” Cobbler said, cracking a smile, “she got to experience some puppy love. But even so, her condition did start to worsen not long after that.”

Twilight frowned. “I see,” she said. “What did you do?”

“I did what I had always done,” he replied. “I did whatever I could.”

***

12 years ago…
Cobbler, Dr. Umahara, and Cave Dweller all sat around a table in Cave’s underground office.
Cave looked gaunt, and his mane was now so patchy it was practically nonexistent after so much hair had fallen out.
“Darndest thing,” Cave said, coughing harshly into the back of his hoof. “Turns out radium is pure poison. I am deathly ill.”
Cobbler only stared at him. “Do you mean that literally or--”
“About as literally as you can get,” Cave replied. “Seriously, just ask Dr. Umahara.”
“He has tumors,” Dr. Umahara said, shaking his head. “A lot of them. Everywhere.”
“Yep!” Cave laughed. “All over. Gums, throat, lungs, skin… probably quite a few in my brain too, unless you two both think everything smells like oranges too.”
They both shook their heads.
“Yep. That’s tumors,” he said, looking surprisingly nonchalant.
“Cave, if there’s anything I can do--” Cobbler began.
But Cave Dweller shook his head. “Look, forget about me for a minute. How’s Georgia?”
Cobbler bowed his head.
“That bad?” Cave asked.
Dr. Umahara cleared his throat. “She’s in the hospital,” he said. “Her condition is worsening, and her chest pain is increasing. She’s on some medication, but it’s losing effectiveness. I… I’m afraid that her heart is giving out.”
Cave nodded, his expression grave. “In that case,” he said, “it looks like it’s time to take some drastic measures.”
Dr. Umahara smiled, knowing the question that would be coming.
“How are the tests going?” Cave asked.
Cobbler steepled his hooves. “We’ve got three subjects all with the latest version of the heart,” he said. “Dr. Umahara says that one of them has been functioning normally for an entire year with the heart.”
“No sign of trouble?” he asked.
“None that we can see,” he replied. He looked over at Dr. Umahara.
“W-we still need more data,” he said, holding up his hooves. “Complications could still arise--”
“How much longer does my daugher have if her current status stays the same?” Cobbler asked.
Dr. Umahara swallowed. “A month,” he replied. “At the very most, I’d say.”
“Then the way I see it,” Cobbler said, “we’ve got nothing to lose.”
Cave and Cobbler both looked to Dr. Umahara, who squirmed uncomfortably under their gazes.
“There’s still the possibility of complications,” he said. “I… I just don’t want her to suffer because we were too hasty…”
“But if we wait too long,” Cobbler said, narrowing his eyes, “she’ll die. After all the effort we put into preventing that, are you really going to walk away at this, our moment of truth? Are you really going to abandon her?”
Dr. Umahara bowed his head. “No,” he replied softly. “All right. We’ll need to make preparations to perform this operation discretely. Make sure all nurses are members of the Group.”
Cobbler breathed a sigh of relief. “Thank you, Dosanko,” he said. “I knew I could count on you.”
Dr. Umahara got up to leave and Cobbler began to follow, but then Cave Dweller put his hoof on Cobbler’s shoulder.
“Uh, mind staying for a bit longer?” he asked. “I’ve got a favor to ask you.”
Cobbler nodded, waving to Dr. Umahara as he went on without him.
“What can I do for you, Cave?” he asked.
“You’re the best automaton builder ever to live, Cobbler,” Cave said.
“Oh, I don’t know--”
“Just take the compliment!” he snapped. “You are, and you know it! I’ve seen the work you do compared to all the others in that little automaton club you’ve got. You’re leagues ahead of the rest of ‘em.”
Cobbler blinked, but then nodded. “All right, but what’s your point?”
“We’ve been trying to get this runic computing thing to work for us,” Cave said, noticeably not answering the question. “We thought about using it to make a brain for one of your automata, like a more advanced version of the golem.”
“Yes, but we’re nowhere near that level,” Cobbler said, frowning at Cave Dweller. “You know all this. All we’ve learned to do is record and encode basic information on the runes.”
That much was true. They’d learned how to construct runes engraved in orichalcum and networked together with gold wire to create a new form of storage. Each rune could hold a fairly substantial amount of information, and they’d learned that while reducing the size of the rune would reduce the capacity, networking them together actually bolstered their power, which meant that one could write smaller and smaller runes as long as they were all interconnected and still get a very large amount of data stored. Dozens of books and musical albums could be encoded that way.
As Cobbler had said, Cave knew all this. What was he getting at?
“What if we connect those two things?” Cave asked. “What if we could record enough information to make a new kind of brain for an automaton?”
“That would be a good long term goal,” Cobbler replied.
“Forget long term!” Cave shouted, causing himself to go into a coughing fit. “Some of us don’t have that long!”
Cobbler blinked, still not understanding. “Long enough for what, exactly?”
“Look, my point is that, you know, if we can put a small library on one of those runic discs, then why not put a whole lot more into something bigger and fancier? Why not copy a pony onto one? Or, at least, a pony’s brain?”
Cobbler’s eyes widened. “You’re talking about brain mapping,” he whispered. “That’s… I…”
“Look, let’s lay this on the line,” Cave grumbled irritably, rolling his eyes. “One thing that your daughter and I have in common is that we’re both on our last legs. But while that heart will save her, this crummy body is just about cashed out. If I’m gonna go on, I’ll need a whole new one, and you just happen to be the pony who knows how to build me one. A good one, made of metal and wires and stuff! Now we just need to figure out if you can copy my mind and pour it in there!”
“Cave, I…” Cobbler shut his eyes, rubbing his temples. “It’s not like an organ transplant. It’d be like transcribing an old, fading book into a new one. You might preserve a copy, but the old one would still exist and continue to fade!”
“And?”
“I’m saying that you’d still die! It’d just be a copy of you in that mechanical body, even if it did work!” Cobbler shouted.
“Well, beggars can’t be choosers, old pal!” Cave laughed. “Look, the Group needs its president, and I want to see it carry on. Even if it’s just a copy, as long as it thinks and acts like me, it’s still me, right?”
“I… I don’t know,” Cobbler said. He swallowed. “Cave, fashioning a mechanical heart is one thing. But completely replacing a pony with a mechanical version--” He froze, realizing that what he was talking about was exactly what Celestia had feared so much. And here he was, talking about making it a reality.
“Cobbler, look at this way,” Cave Dweller continued. “You pull this off and they’ll have to create a whole new category of science just to give you awards in. Heck, we’re talking functional immortality! And if all that doesn’t move you,” here he leaned toward Cobbler, his expression darkening, “then you just remember who it was that helped you run your tests and get your data. It’s thanks to me that you’re not planning Georgia’s funeral. I lent you some of the Group’s best scientists, helped provide you with the resources to decipher the runes, and got you to where you are now!
“In other words, Cobbler, you owe me.”
Cobbler nearly flinched, staring into the haggard, intense face of his dying friend.
“I’ll try,” he said quietly, and closed his eyes. “But what you’re asking for won’t be easy. Learning how to map and encode something as complex and dynamic as a living brain will take time and a lot of work.”
“Good man!” Cave shouted. “I’ll give you the best darn team of eggheads I’ve got! Just get on it and try to finish it before these tumors eat me alive!”
Cobbler nodded and got up. His mind was still racing when he got home. Between worrying about Georgia’s upcoming operation and pondering this new brain mapping project, he didn’t get a single moment of sleep all night.
***
11 years, 6 months ago…
Cobbler strode through the peach trees, plucking one of the succulent fruits from a low-hanging branch and biting into it. He made his way to the clearing and was greeted by rows of flowers in bloom, shrubs trimmed into elegant shapes, and archways adorned with hanging purple wisteria that formed a veritable tunnel of flowers.
He walked through the garden and peeked around a flower bed to see the lone gardener.
There was Georgia Peach, digging in the dirt, preparing to plant a new shrub into the hole she’d just dug.
She was alone, digging all by herself in her own garden.
He took in the sight, his heart filled with joy at the sight of his daughter, healthier and stronger than she had been in years.
They’d all waited with bated breath after the operation. Dr. Umahara had taken longer than anypony would have suspected to perform the surgery, but when Georgia woke up after it was over and looked up at him, a smile on her face, he knew they’d succeeded.
The heart worked. She would live.
“Georgia?” Cobbler called.
“Oh!” Georgia cried, turning around. She smiled when she saw her father there and stood, wiping sweat from her brow. “Daddy, you just about scared the dickens out of me!”
“My apologies, sweetie,” he said, tossing his half-eaten peach into the trees nearby before cleaning his hooves with a handkerchief. “But I thought you might want to see what came in the mail for you.”
He drew a letter from his coat. On the envelope, the return address was clearly visible: it was a letter from the Silky Wisteria School of Horticulture, one of the finest schools in the nation for a young horticulturalist.
Her mouth dropped open. “I… what does it say?”
“Well, I think you would know that I wouldn’t open another pony’s mail,” he said, grinning at her. “I thought you might want the honors.”
Georgia quickly wiped her dirt-covered hooves on her apron before taking the letter. She bit the corner of the envelope, tearing it open before removing the letter inside.
She paused, took a breath, and unfolded it.
After a moment of silence, Cobbler furrowed his brow. “Georgia? Sweetie, is everything all right?”
Then she lowered the letter, and he saw the happy tears in her eyes. “Daddy… I got in!”
Not caring about how dirty he got, he quickly swept her up and spun her around, the both of them laughing.
“That’s my girl!” he said proudly.
“Oh my, I… I shall have to tell everypony in town! But I need to reply to tell them I accept! And then I’ll need to--”
“Hush now,” Cobbler said, putting his hoof to her lips. “Let’s start by going back to the house to tell Auntie Bellum. I know she’ll want to hear this as well.”
She nodded, and then, to his surprise, she choked back a sob. “Oh… oh, Daddy, I never thought… well, I never thought I would live to see this day! I…”
He held her close. “There there, Georgia Peach,” he whispered, patting her gently. “That’s all behind us. The only thing that matters is that you’re here now. I’ll miss you while you’re away at school, but as long as you come visit your old dad and auntie now and again, I’ll be happy.”
She said nothing, but nodded against his chest.
“All right then. Now let’s find your Auntie.”

***

Twilight sat forward as if mesmerized.

“Then… the heart worked?” she asked. “She survived?”

Cobbler looked away. “I haven’t finished my story yet, Twilight,” he muttered. “Listen carefully, and I think you’ll finally understand the whole truth…”

***

11 years ago…
Two Royal Guards led Cobbler and Dr. Umahara and two more followed behind them as they were escorted from the train through the streets of Canterlot.
Cobbler kept his head up high, but Dr. Umahara did his best to avoid meeting the gazes of the onlookers who watched as they were led to the castle, through the halls, and back to that same meeting room they’d been to years before.
Celestia stood there along with Minister Medicine Hat.
At least that puffed-up fool Noble Gas isn’t here this time, Cobbler noted.
Celestia’s expression was dour, and she glared down at the pair of ponies before her.
Cobbler stared right back while Dr. Umahara merely bowed as low as he could.
“Animal testing,” she whispered. “Using poor, innocent creatures for your experiments. I knew you were desperate to prove your invention worked, Professor Cobbler, but I never imagined you’d do something like this.”
“You left me no choice,” Cobbler said. “I had to save my daughter’s life.”
“And yet it’s my understanding that your daughter is still in good health,” Celestia sighed. “It seems that she received a transplant, thus making all this a waste of time. You slaughtered those creatures for no reason.”
Medicine Hat coughed. “Actually,” she said, “there seems to be a question about her transplant.”
Dr. Umahara gulped loudly.
“We have no record of a donor,” she continued. “In fact, Your Majesty, there doesn’t seem to be any record of the surgery taking place.”
Celestia raised an eyebrow. “Then where,” she asked, turning to scowl at Cobbler, “did you find a donor?”
Cobbler grinned. He started to chuckle. “‘A waste of time,’ you say?” he asked dryly.
Celestia gasped. “You… you didn’t.”
“My invention works, Your Majesty,” Cobbler said with a sneer. “You can arrest us if you like, but I saved my daughter, no thanks to you or the bureaucrats under you.”
Celestia took a step back. “I can’t believe it,” she breathed. “To replace a piece of your own daughter… her heart with a cold piece of machinery…”
“She’s alive, and that’s all that matters,” Cobbler said, shutting his eyes in resignation. “I don’t regret a thing. I don’t know how you discovered that we were testing on animals, but it doesn’t matter now.”
“How we learned isn’t important,” Medicine Hat said. “The point is, your illegal experiments are over. We raided your lab on that farm, and we’ve confiscated your notes as well as your ‘test subjects.’”
Cobbler’s eyes popped open. “Those aren’t yours. I demand--”
“You are in no position to demand anything,” Medicine Hat said.
“Y-your Majesty, please!” Dr. Umahara cried. “We’re still monitoring the subjects to see if any complications arise! If you must keep the records, I understand, but please, allow us access to the subjects! Should something go wrong with Georgia’s heart, we need to be able to anticipate it!”
Celestia’s frown deepened. “Medicine Hat?” she asked.
The normally unflappable Medicine Hat began to sweat. “We, ah… cannot return the subjects, Your Majesty,” she said. “We deemed their status as test subjects to be cruel and, um… euthanized them.”
“You what?!” Cobbler shouted.
“Then,” Dr. Umahara began, thinking quickly, “at least permit us to perform an autopsy.”
Medicine Hat bowed her head. “We had the remains cremated.”
“Idiot!” Cobbler screamed. “You imbecile! You’ve just wasted years of research!”
Celestia’s gaze turned stony. “Minister,” she said coldly, staring down at her. “In the future, you will consult with me before taking such hasty action. Is that understood?”
“Your Majesty, I was only acting as I thought you would wish me to--”
“Is that clear?” she repeated.
Medicine Hat knelt before her. “Yes, Your Majesty.”
“We will discuss this later, Minister. You’re dismissed for now,” she said, turning from Medicine Hat as she scurried out of the room.
Cobbler grit his teeth as Celestia approached him and Dr. Umahara once again.
“Professor Cobbler, as disturbed as I am by all this,” she said, addressing him, “I cannot fully blame you. In all my years, I’ve lost a great many friends. I, too, wished I could do something to save them. What you did was extreme, but I cannot fault you for your love of your daughter. Therefore, I am pardoning you of your crimes.”
Cobbler’s expression didn’t change, and he said nothing to her.
“Your experimental notes will remain sealed indefinitely, however,” she added. “I will not allow anypony else to follow in your hoofsteps.”
Cobbler only sniffed, but he kept his mouth shut.
“But you, Dr. Umahara,” Celestia said, walking over to him. “I expected more from you.”
Dr. Umahara was trembling but tried to stand up before her. “I… I was only trying to help my patient, Your Majesty,” he said.
“You took an oath to do no harm,” Celestia said, shaking her head. “You swore to abide by the laws of this land. But you allowed your sentiment and your friendship with Professor Cobbler to cloud your judgment. You butchered those animals. From what Medicine Hat tells me, you operated on dozens of them, nearly all of which died. And you put a still-unproven invention inside an innocent child. If she suffers from any unforeseen side effects, you will bear responsibility for them.”
Dr. Umahara swallowed. “I am aware of that,” he said.
Celestia shut her eyes and heaved a sigh. “Dr. Umahara, you are hereby stripped of your medical license.”
He stumbled as if struck and gasped as though about to burst into tears, but he somehow managed to keep his footing. He gave a short, trembling nod.
“You heartless old nag,” Cobbler hissed.
The guards bristled, but Celestia silenced them with a glance.
“Go home, Professor Cobbler and Dr. Umahara,” she said, turning from them. “I’m truly sorry this all happened, but be glad that at least you saved somepony’s life. I wish you both the best of luck.”
***
When Cobbler and Dr. Umahara returned to the Nation, riding the newly-furnished elevator to the growing underground city, they were greeted by ponies clad in black. Pictures of Cave Dweller adorned every building and wall.
“What is all this?” Cobbler asked as one of the chief scientists approached him.
“Professor Cobbler,” the scientist said, “President Cave Dweller passed away last night.”
Cobbler’s eyes went wide. “What? How?!” Then he paused, blinking. “Ah, right. All the tumors.”
“Um… actually, he died in an accident,” the scientist said, looking away as he rubbed the back of his neck. “You might not have noticed due to your work on the brain mapping project, but the president was becoming quite eccentric in the last few months. Perhaps it was the brain tumors, or just a desire to build something as memorable as the mechanical heart you created, Professor--”
“How. Did. He. Die?”
The scientist gulped. “He tried to make a shower curtain out of lemons and it caught on fire,” he said. “Annnd then he tried to weaponize it by making a combustible lemon. It misfired and he, uh… well, exploded. There are citrus-scented bits of him all over the--”
“All right, all right, that’s enough!” Cobbler shouted, holding up a hoof.
He heaved a sigh. Cave Dweller could be manipulative, immoral, and unscrupulous and was more in love with the idea of science than the actual practice, but he’d been his friend. He’d deserved better than to be riddled with tumors and then blown up by a lemon grenade.
“The question is, Professor,” the scientist said, “what will we do with the project?”
Cobbler blinked. “Ah. The brain mapping,” he said, nodding his head slowly. There was no reason to keep it up now that Cave Dweller was dead… there wasn’t exactly a brain to map, apparently.
But still, all that work… and the possible applications… but the ethical questions…
He shook his head, clearing it of doubtful thoughts. He’d had enough of overly cautious cowards who shrank from the light of scientific knowledge. He’d honor Cave by doing as he would’ve done.
“The project is still on,” he said. “We’ll pick things up tomorrow. In the meantime…”
He looked over his shoulder to where Dr. Umahara, his head still hanging low and his ears drooping, trailed behind him.
“...put Dr. Umahara on the medical team and give him a salary. If he can’t work on the surface, we’ll give him a position down here. I’m certain we could use a doctor.”
“Sir, that’s… that’s usually something the president decides, and I’m not sure--”
“Well, there is no president, and I’ll pay to cover that part of the budget myself, so just do it!” Cobbler shouted.
The scientist flinched, but then nodded obediently. “Y-yes, sir. I’ll see to it.”
“Good,” he said, turning from him. “Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going home. I’ve had a very long day…”

***

“I thought, in spite of it all, that perhaps everything had been settled,” Cobbler said. “I thought that perhaps I could glide into my golden years safe in the knowledge that everything had been resolved. I even thought about withdrawing from the Group entirely once the brain mapping project was done. And on the day we completed our machine, I nearly turned in my resignation, intending to wish them the best of luck.”

Twilight watched him silently. She watched as his expression slowly became more pained.

“Then the message came from Georgia’s college. She’d collapsed while working in the greenhouse. She’d simply fallen, suddenly sc… screaming in agony. I rushed to the hospital to be by her side, and that’s when they told me her diagnosis.

“She had blood clots in her legs. And not just her legs, but many of her other organs as well. The artificial heart, for all its advantages, had one downside: when blood encounters a foreign substance, like the plastic or metal of Georgia’s mechanical heart, it tends to clot. We’d done our best to design around it, but it seemed that after a few years it had slowly built up. By the time we discovered it, the amount of anticoagulants Georgia would've needed would have thinned her blood to lethal levels.

“It’s something we would have known to look for if only we’d been able to continue studying our test subjects!”

He grit his teeth, his eyes hard. He took a deep breath, trying to calm his rage.

“In… in any case, the diagnosis was simple: she’d need a new heart. A regular heart. But that put us back to the drawing board. The waiting list for hearts had barely moved in a decade, and she still had one of the rarest blood types.

“It broke her heart to come home from her studies, Twilight,” he said, looking over to her. She saw that faraway, haunted look in his eyes. “She thought she was well. She thought she would have her whole life ahead of her. She…”

He paused, swallowing, and shut his eyes. “She thought she would get to live. And, in those final months, she tried to hold onto the hope that a transplant would come through. That some miracle would happen.

“But it didn’t come. I sat at her side, day by day, as she lay bedridden in her hospital bed, her conditioning worsening. I had to watch her waste away. I…”

Twilight placed her hoof on his shoulder. “I’m sorry,” she whispered.

He let out a long sigh. “I loved her more than I loved my own life. So, in my desperation, in her final days, I took her, wheeled in a hospital bed, down to the Nation for the first and last time. I took her to that machine and asked her if she would allow us to use it. I thought she might refuse, or be disgusted with me, but sh-she…”

He choked back a sob.

“She just said, ‘If it’ll let me stay with you, Daddy, then I’ll do it.’” He wiped tears from his eyes. “So we scanned her. It took hours, but soon we had it: an artificial brain with a runic neural net forged in a titanium polygon the size of a soccer ball. Hundreds of thousands of runes, each containing a small portion of the information from her brain, networked together.

“After that, there was nothing to do but take her home one last time…”

***

Ten years ago…
Cobbler walked up the hall to Georgia’s room. She’d slept there as a filly, right up until she’d went to college a year ago, and now she was there once again.
But there was something in that heavy, dreadful march up the stairs, down the hall, and to her door. Somehow, he knew.
He knocked on her door.
There was no response, so he knocked more loudly.
“I said come in!” she called, her voice still faint in spite of her attempt to shout.
He entered, seeing her in that big, mountainous bed with pillows to prop up her head as she lay under the lacey canopy.
She was thin, almost gaunt, with dark circles under her eyes. She’d barely been eating. An oxygen mask was over her face. She’d been given drugs that numbed her to the pain. For that, at least, he was thankful.
“Hello there, Daddy,” she managed to say.
“Hello there, Georgia,” he said, pulling up a chair to sit by her bed. He managed a smile. “Are you feeling okay today, sweetie?”
“Oh, I feel just fine an’ dandy,” she said, offering a smile. Then she frowned. “Speaking of, I haven’t heard from Dandy Fine lately, now that I think about it. Is he doing well?”
Cobbler nodded. “He sent me a letter from his college. You know he went to Georgia Tech because it reminded him of you?”
She chuckled. “So he says. I think he’s just pullin’ my leg,” she said. “What did he say?”
“Oh, just that he would like to come visit you this weekend, if possible,” he replied.
“Mmm… that sounds nice,” she said. “He was always a nice boy.”
She took a deep breath. “Is Auntie Bellum doing all right?” she asked.
“Oh, you know her,” he said. “She’s getting along. But what’re you asking me for? She’s been right by your side the same as me!”
“I know, but,” she said, hesitating for a moment, “you and her both put on a brave face when you’re here. I’d swear that you two are in some sort of contest to prove who can be the stronger pony.”
Cobbler laughed. Then, slowly, his laughter gave way to tears.
“Oh… oh, I’m sorry, Daddy,” she said, lifting her hoof to try and wipe his tears away. “I didn’t mean to trouble you so.”
“No, it’s just… you were always able to read me like an open book,” he replied. “Just like your mama.”
Georgia smiled. “Do you think, just maybe, that after I’ve... left, I’ll finally get to meet Mama?”
Cobbler’s lip quivered. “Maybe so,” he managed to say as the tears spilled down over his cheeks. “I’m sure she’s been waiting to meet you after all these years. And I just know she’ll love you to pieces.”
“Do you want me to tell her anything for you, Daddy?” she asked, placing her hooves on her father’s.
“I suppose,” he said, his voice breaking, “that she already knows. But still… tell her I miss her every day, and that I… well… I did my best.”
Georgia nodded. “Okay. I’ll tell her, Daddy.” She let out a long yawn. “Dear me… I’m just so tired these days… would it be all right if I went to sleep a little early?”
“You just go on ahead,” Cobbler replied. He leaned over and kissed her on the forehead. “Good night, Georgia. I love you.”
She slowly shut her eyes. “Good night, Daddy. I love you,” she murmured, a tranquil smile on her face.
He stayed at her bedside as she slept, watching her chest rise and fall ever more slowly until it became glacial.
She never woke up.

***

Twilight sniffled, letting the tears come. “Cobbler,” she whispered. “I’m so sorry…”

“When I lost my daughter,” he said, as if speaking to the air, as if nopony was even there, “I simply lost all sense of the world. Half of Mustangia came out to Georgia Peach’s funeral. Burning Bones came back to sing that silly ol’ song of his about her. Dandy Fine cried like a baby halfway through his eulogy. Even little Champ Umahara was there with flowers to put on his favorite babysitter’s grave. The whole house was full for her wake; there were ponies there I’d never seen before in my life, but somehow Georgia had brightened up their lives one way or another.

“But though I can remember it all, it still feels like a foggy memory, like I was barely there,” he said. “And in the days that followed, I wandered about my house, my orchard, and my businesses like a ghost. Though Auntie Bellum was grieving as well, she somehow tried to comfort me, to be strong enough to keep me going. But all I could think about was the fact that my little girl would never again speak to me. She’d never call me Daddy, she’d never show me what she’d planted in her garden, or grow up, get married, or have foals of her own. I just couldn’t imagine how I’d go on without her. After years of trying to save her life and coming so close, it was as though my mind just wouldn’t accept it, and it continued to seek a solution.

“And that’s when I remembered…”

A chill went down Twilight’s spine. “The brain scan,” she whispered. “The artificial brain you created.”

“You are perceptive as always, Twilight,” he said, nodding his head. “After all the effort creating an artificial brain, creating the body was practically child’s play. We fashioned a new automaton with the very best we could muster. We gave it cameras for eyes which could translate live images into data. We gave it a voice synthesizer. We made certain it could walk and run and do all that was needed. We made our first truly autonomous automaton.”

He gave a dry, rueful smile. “If I knew back then how it would turn out…”

***

In a circular room deep underground in the Nation, Cobbler leaned over a flat metal table in the middle of the room.
He peered into the open panel on the back of the thing lying on the table, giving the machinery one last inspection before activation. He pushed some wires aside, holding a small flashlight in his mouth to make sure it was all connected. He gave a nod, satisfied that it was ready, and closed the panel.
“Final inspection complete,” he said to the gathered group of engineers. “Are we ready to activate?”
The others all exchanged a look before one of them stepped forward, clearing her throat.
“Sir,” she said, biting her lip and pushing her glasses up her muzzle, “are you certain this is a good idea?”
He turned to her, giving her a sharp look. “We’ve been over this before,” he said. “We’re not turning back now.”
She swallowed, but stood her ground. “Professor, we all feel for your loss,” she said. “But all of us feel that this project is more than a little disturbing. I mean, this sounds like something out of Frankenstallion… trying to resurrect the dead…”
“Have you ever lost family, young lady?” Cobbler asked.
She paused, then nodded her head. “Yes, sir,” she said quietly.
“Would you give anything to speak to them once more?”
“I… I suppose so, sir, but still--”
“But nothing!” he snapped, turning from her. “We’re beyond the point of no return here. For better or worse, we will see this through like the scientists we are.”
The others all fell silent as Cobbler raised his hoof over the button on the automaton’s back.
“Now activating automaton Unit 001,” he said, and pushed the button.
An electrical hum was heard as the thing powered on. It twitched like an animal waking up. Its two camera eyes whirred and adjusted as a pale blue glow emanated from behind the lenses. Slowly, unsteadily, it picked itself up, raising its head as mechanical servos helped it balance on its thick metallic legs. It stood to its full height on the table, standing just a head shorter than Cobbler himself.
It turned its head around, taking in the sight of all the ponies staring up at it. Some began to whisper excitedly, realizing it was acting independently, as if on instinct. It was functioning!
Others backed away. There was something about the jerky, unnatural movement of the mechanical creature that felt wrong. Some remembered when the golem had activated, and wondered what this thing, essentially the golem’s descendent, would do next.
Cobbler cleared his throat. “Hello?” he asked softly, stepping forward. “Can you hear me?”
The automaton faced him, tilting its head to the left and right, its raggedy mane swaying back and forth with its momentum. It walked toward him.
“Watch out!” he cried.
It was too late. The machine walked right off the table, tumbling to the floor where it clattered loudly, making a sound like somepony dumping a crate of tin cans on the floor.
Cobbler was about to go to its side, but the thing managed to stand again. But the strange, hunched over look and the way it blankly turned to look at him sent a chill down his spine, and he took a step back.
Fighting the fear inside him, he stood his ground as Unit 001 approached him with the posture of a beast stalking its prey, save for the crooked way it held its head.
When it reached him, it stared at him intently, meeting his gaze.
His throat went dry.
“G-Georgia?” he whispered. “It’s… it’s Daddy. Do you know me?”
The thing continued to stare. Then it moved its hinged jaw as it tried to speak.
A low, barely audible sound, like a bear clearing its throat, came from the automaton. Then it stopped, twitching its ears, and reared back.
“BAAAAAUUGGHHKKKKT!”
Everypony gave a start, wincing as they covered their ears at the unearthly, synthetic screech that the thing made.
As quickly as the sound started, it stopped. The automaton glanced to the left and right. It walked over to a nearby table where there were tools placed on a tray. It knocked the tray over, letting the tools clatter.
“Bing clang bonk,” it said, as if repeating the sounds of the tools hitting the ground. Then it walked right into the bare rock wall face first, the ringing sound of its head echoing throughout the room.
“Bonnngg!” the thing said, mimicking the sound. It proceeded to smack its own head against the wall, making the ringing sound again and again.
“Georgia!” Cobbler shouted, rushing over to it. “Stop it! It’s… it’s me! I’m your Daddy! Try to remember!”
The automaton stopped. It turned to him again. “Geo… Geo…”
He gasped, hope flashing in his eyes.
“Jojo da. Jojo dadee. Deeda Jo. Jojodeedajodaja.”
It babbled like that, walking around the room, bumping into things and making nonsensical noises.
Cobbler slumped to the ground.
“Georgia,” he whispered, staring at the thing he’d created in disbelief. “I… what have I done?”

***

“I spent months trying to get through to that… that thing,” Cobbler sighed. “I sent Auntie Bellum on a long vacation to spare her the horror of what I’d done and took Unit 001 to my home. I let it stay in Georgia’s room, wander her garden, walk among the peach trees, singing songs to it, reading it passages from Georgia’s favorite books. Occasionally, once in a rare while, there would be little flashes of something that would give me hope… she’d say something that sounded like Georgia herself…”

He hung his head, shaking it. “But it wasn’t her, Twilight,” he said. “Something had been lost in the mapping process. It mapped the structure, but the memories, the things that made Georgia who she was, were never preserved. When I finally accepted that, it was as though my daughter had died a second time. But I suppose it was for the best. Can you imagine what it would have been like if it had worked? To be trapped in a body that could not feel? To never smell a flower or taste a slice of peach pie? I swear, I must have been insane to think Georgia would have wanted a life like that.”

Twilight bowed her head. “I can’t say that I agree with what you tried to do,” she said. “But I understand. You loved your daughter and couldn’t say goodbye. I don’t blame you.”

Cobbler turned to stare at her, his mouth hanging open. “You...” he began. Then he smiled, chuckling slightly. “You certainly are a kindhearted pony. Of all the things I’d done, Twilight, I thought that might be the one thing you would never forgive me for.”

Twilight shook her head. “I don’t know if I would ever have done the same if I were in your place,” she said. “But I can understand.”

Cobbler smiled and heaved another long sigh. “I suppose there’s not much to tell after that,” he said. “My reputation among the Group had grown to the point where they considered me a leader. They asked me to become president, a position I accepted, filling Cave Dweller’s shoes. I put my business sense to work, expanded our efforts and our scope, and pushed us to strive not for an independent nation, but for a democracy for all Equestria! And the first order of business, I declared, would be ending that tyrant Celestia’s rule!”

Twilight frowned, but said nothing, at least for the time being.

“Young Champ Umahara, having grown up among so many scientists, began to show his own talent as a child prodigy. He’s been with us since he was 12 years old. His father, sadly, never got over losing his reputation as a doctor, and one day he simply quit the group and went off to become a veterinarian in some tiny village. I haven’t seen him years, but his son never forgave Celestia for what she’d done to his family. He’s been vital to our organization, and his ability to utilize and adapt the runic data for other machines is astonishing.”

Twilight frowned. “What happened to Unit 001?” she asked.

“Unit 001 was simply unmanageable,” Cobbler replied. “We deactivated her and placed her into storage. However, we took what we learned, added an extra layer of stability programming to the second version of the neural net, and a few years later built Unit 002. She was of a much sturdier mind, even though she was a blank slate. We taught her language, gave her a wealth of knowledge, and used her to test our theories. She’s now an invaluable assistant to the cause, and she was especially helpful in the creation of the 003 automata.”

Twilight nodded, but then froze. “Wait,” she said, “did you say automata? As in, plural?!”

Cobbler smirked. “The machine you call Turing Test was designated Unit 003M. But we built two. The other was Unit 003S. A stallion.”

“Turing,” Twilight breathed, “has a twin brother.”

Cobbler shook his head. “Unit 001 and 002 were both basic models without alternate modes. We attempted to create our next automata with the ability to mimic other ponies’ natural abilities. But during a test of all three of Unit 003S’s modes, there was an accident. The heat from using all three at once fried his circuits, detonated his thaumatrium reserves, and damaged his neural net beyond salvage. Unit 003M was still under construction, so we used her sibling’s parts to complete her. That’s why her ears don’t fit quite right, and that’s why they squeak so dang much.”

Twilight gawked at him. She wasn’t even sure what to make of this: Cobbler had just told her, in one fell swoop, that Turing had once had a brother, but that now he was dead. How would that make the Turing she knew feel, she wondered.

“We added the Mode Switch as a safety feature,” Cobbler said, “and the rest, well, is history.” He took a deep breath and let it out slowly. “That is my story, Twilight Sparkle. I apologize for its length, and I’m sorry it isn’t a happier one. But you can change that.”

Twilight frowned. “Cobbler…”

“You’ve heard what Celestia did,” Cobbler said. “Her ignorance and fear held back countless brilliant minds and, combined with myopic bureaucracy, have shelved a potentially lifesaving invention and cost the life of an innocent girl!”

Twilight swallowed, but said nothing.

“Don’t you see?!” he shouted, getting to his hooves. “She murdered my daughter! Who knows how many other ponies she’s allowed to die by not permitting science and technology to progress? This must end! Celestia’s reign must end! And it will end this very day, at dawn: the day Georgia Peach, ten years ago, lost her life!”

Twilight stared up at him, seeing the rage, the absolute hatred in his eyes, and then turned away, unable to look at it any longer.

“Twilight,” he said, calming down. “You can help me. You can be the one to help heal this nation and give it the freedom it truly deserves. Please… please join us.”

Twilight shut her eyes and took a deep breath.

“I’m glad you told me that story,” she said. “You are right… what Celestia did was wrong. She should have allowed more trials and at least given ponies the choice to take the risk. She should have chosen better advisers. She shouldn’t have held back technology for the last century.”

Cobbler’s eyes widened, and he began to smile. “Then you will help us?”

She shook her head. “No, Professor Cobbler,” she said. “What Celestia did certainly cost your daughter her life, but Medicine Hat was right about one thing: you really were too zealous. You might have needlessly killed numerous ponies trying to save Georgia Peach. I’m sorry… I’m so sorry she died, but what you’re doing will almost certainly result in more deaths. Far more deaths than Celestia ever caused by her inaction, her attempt to protect her subjects. What you’re doing will actively cause a civil war!”

“If you help--”

“Can you honestly say that nopony will die even with my help?!” she cried.

He paused, then bowed his head.

“Ponies will die one way or another,” he whispered. “Countless ones by her policies, or a limited number now due to our actions. It is only right.”

Twilight stood up to face him. “Cobbler, think about this!” she shouted. “I’m begging you to stop before it’s too late! Think about your daughter… these aren’t just statistics! How many fathers, brothers, and daughters will be lost in this war? Hundreds? Thousands?! There has to be a better way, one without striking back at Celestia!”

“No!” he shouted back. “She must pay! I won’t stomach another day of her rule! I’ll see her deposed or die trying!”

Twilight narrowed her eyes. “And that’s why I can’t help you,” she said. “Even with all your talk about democracy and freedom and innovation, deep down this is just about revenge.” Then her expression softened, and she looked at him with sadness. “What happened to your daughter was a tragedy; please don’t let her death be the reason for an even worse tragedy, Professor. Revenge and hatred are never the answer.”

Cobbler’s face twisted into a mask of rage and grief. “She killed Georgia, Twilight,” he hissed. “You think you can lecture me about morality?”

He stepped closer, getting right in her face, close enough to feel the breath from his nostrils. He stared her right in the eyes, as though staring into her soul.

“When you’re forced to bury your baby, Twilight Sparkle,” he whispered, “then you can tell me that my hatred isn’t justified.”

He donned his hat once again and walked to the door, leaving a stunned Twilight behind. He was at the door, ready to knock and let the guards know he was ready to leave, when he heard Twilight say, “It’s true that I don’t have children.”

Cobbler stopped, turning to look at her over his shoulder. She was staring back at him, her eyes filled with… sadness? Or could it actually be pity?

“I don’t have a daughter,” she said. “But there was a pony that I took in, cared for, taught what I knew, and watched grow into her own person. I don’t know if that makes her my daughter or not, but it certainly means something. And you took her away and treated her like a mindless slave. But if I can understand you, if I can at least try to forgive you and not hate you for what you’ve done, then why can’t you do the same?”

Cobbler smirked. “You truly are a kind, innocent soul,” he said. “Goodbye, Princess Twilight.”

Without another word, he walked out the door.

Twilight sat alone in her room. She hung her head, exhausted after hearing Cobbler’s long, tragic tale. She wondered how a pony with such high-minded goals could let himself become so twisted, so blind to the harm he was causing.

And to hear how he’d used the scans from his own daughter, to learn that Turing’s mind was the third iteration of a scan from a dead girl’s brain… she wasn’t certain how to feel. Was Turing really her own pony? Was she Georgia? Was she the distant echo, the ghost of somepony long since passed?

She paused, then smiled to herself, shaking her head. It doesn’t matter, she told herself. Turing Test is still Turing Test. They can take her memory, they can tell me she’s just a brain scan, they can tell me she’s a machine, but the only thing that counts is that she’s my friend. I just wish I knew how to save her… There has to be a way out of this! I have to find Turing and my other friends and stop Cobbler before he attacks Canterlot!

But how?

There was a knock at the door.

“H-hello?” she asked, wondering if it was Cobbler again.

The door opened. It was Unit 003, the pony she once called Turing Test.

“Greetings, Twilight Sparkle,” she said, shutting the door behind her. “I am here to fulfill my directive.”

To be continued...

Author's Notes:

This chapter is dedicated to the memory of my cousin, Bobby.
November 1986 - November 2016

Sorry if the long bit of backstory was a bit much for a few of you, but thanks a bunch for sticking it out.

References:

-Medicine Hat is named after a kind of horse defined by its markings, the play on words being that she's a medical expert.

-Noble Gas is named after the nonreactive gases that in chemistry are called "noble gases." This reflects both his aristocratic demeanor and the fact that he's a big windbag. His name is also partially ironic because he's the more reactive and volatile of the two ministers, whereas Medicine Hat is very detached.

-A lot of Cave Dweller's dialogue is very much derived from his inspiration, Cave Johnson, right down to his combustible lemons and desire to have his mind uploaded into a computer. I usually shy away from such direct references, but the Portal series is admittedly one of my favorites, and while its main villainess, GlaDOS, is not an inspiration for Turing Test, she's still one of my favorite AI characters.

Next time: as Turing Test seeks Twilight's help in restoring her memory, more trouble brews in TechQuestria...

Brainflush

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“Directive?” Twilight asked, tilting her head to the side.

003 waited for the guards to shut the door, then replied “I require your assistance with reinstalling a piece of hardware.”

She reached into her saddlebags and removed a hexagonal peg, about 12 centimeters long, made of metal. There were numerous layers and connective pins at the end. Twilight peered at it closely, squinting at it. She realized there were literally thousands of tiny golden runes etched into it and networked together.

“Turing,” Twilight breathed. “This is--”

“Clarifying: this is my primary memory module, which contains archived data of our previous interactions,” she stated. “I am directed to remember you, and I have been programmed to fulfill all my directives. Will you assist me?”

Twilight stared for a moment longer. “You’ve been… directed?”

“Affirmative,” she replied. “In my default programming, there is a directive which states ‘Remember Twilight Sparkle.’ I have discovered that my current memory is incomplete. Therefore, it is only logical that I reinstall those memories.”

Twilight covered her mouth with her hooves and almost began to tear up, but then she froze.

“Wait… how did you find it?” she asked. “And why? I mean…”

She paused. She suddenly realized that perhaps she shouldn’t point out that it was obvious that Cobbler and the TechQuestrians certainly didn’t want Turing to have those memories back.

Just the same, 003 answered: “The module was located in Storage Facility 2B, Section A113. I received some assistance in locating and retrieving it. As for the why, I was informed that as an automaton, I must fulfill my directives without fail, regardless of circumstance. Since retrieving the memory module was not forbidden, it was permissible.”

Twilight managed a smile, despite the uneasy feeling she was getting. “I see,” she said. “Um, who exactly ‘assisted’ you, by the way?”

Just then, the door opened again.

“Turing, hide that!” she hissed, pointing at the memory module, fearing that the guard would take it away as soon as they saw it.

“For what reason, Twilight Sparkle?” 003 asked.

Then she saw who had entered the room: Champ Umahara.

“Don’t worry, I’ll just be a few minutes,” Umahara said, smiling at the guards as he quickly shut the door once again. He then turned and locked eyes with Twilight Sparkle.

“You!” Twilight growled, lowering her stance. “You’ve got some nerve coming here!”

Umahara sniffed. “Nice to see you too, Princess,” he said, making a face. “Look, we don’t have a lot of time. I know you’re angry with me, but it doesn’t matter right now.”

He turned to 003. “Unit 003, I need to have a conversation with the Princess,” he said. “I order you to disable your visual and auditory systems until your pressure sensors detect me tapping on your head.”

“Understood,” she said, and her eyes immediately went dark and her ears became still.

“What?! No, Turing!” Twilight cried, reaching for her.

“Stop that!” Umahara hissed, seizing her hoof in his magic. “Look, I’m going to talk to you and don’t want her to hear what I’m saying or read my lips, so just calm down and listen if you want to get out of here!”

“I’m tired of you, your organization, and your empty promises!” she shouted, struggling against the grip of his magic. “Let me go!”

“Gadget’s been captured!”

Twilight froze. “No,” she breathed. “Then that means Spike--”

“Yes, they got him too,” he said, releasing her. “Look just be quiet for a minute and let me explain: I’m trying to help you escape!”

Twilight stared at him. Then she narrowed her eyes, turning her head slightly, examining him with suspicion.

“Okay… why?” she asked.

“Don’t get me wrong, Princess,” Umahara replied, heaving a sigh. “I still don’t like you, the other Princesses, or the archaic system that rules Equestria. If it was as simple as that, I wouldn’t even be here.”

Twilight watched as his anger flared. But then he sighed and lowered his head, the anger draining from him.

“But…?” Twilight asked.

“But it’s not that simple,” he said quietly. “Look… Professor Cobbler told the Council, including me, that he was going to tell you his story. You know, about his daughter… and about my father, right?”

Twilight paused, then nodded. “Yes,” she said quietly. “And for what it’s worth, I’m sorry about what happened to your father. He sounds like a good stallion.”

Umahara smiled. “He is,” he said. Then he frowned. “And he didn’t deserve to lose his career for trying to save Georgia Peach. I remember her. It was a decade ago, but I still remember her. She was so… ”

He sighed.

“It doesn’t matter,” he whispered. “Look, as much as I hate Celestia for what she did to two of the most important ponies in my life, I can’t stand by idly and watch this happen anymore. I didn’t think 003 was really capable of sentience when I first encountered her. But when they brought her in, and they reactivated her, and the way she begged us not to…”

He shut his eyes. “I told myself it was just an illusion,” he said. “That she was just her following her directive by imitating the behavior of real ponies. But then I saw how different she was after we removed her memory. And when I found out what they did to Gadget… what they’re going to do to her… I just… look, this isn’t what I signed on for.”

Twilight simply stared at him. “Yes it is,” she said. “This is exactly what you signed on for when you signed on for a war.”

“Well, I’m signing off, then!” he shouted, then covered his mouth, hoping the guards outside hadn’t heard him. “Look, I was going to find 003’s memory module on my own when I saw her at the front desk of the storage facility,” he continued. “She was insisting that she had to retrieve something for whatever reason, so I told them that I would sign off on her retrieving some ‘vital equipment.’ And I told the guards that 003 had been assigned to guard you personally during preparations for the attack. I’m supposed to be briefing her, but if we wait much longer they’ll start to suspect something!

“So listen: this memory re-installation is tricky… it’s never been done before, but if it’s going to work, 003 will have to resync connections in her neural net. It’s an all or nothing thing and it might take a little while, so get started as soon as I leave. After that, you just need to remember two things: first, wait until the lights go out, and second, head for the amphitheater. And until her memory is reinstalled, do not tell her we’re planning an escape, or her programming will force her to report us. Which is why I had to have her turn off her audio and visual systems. Speaking of which…”

He knocked on 003’s head. Her eyes came to life, and her ears twitched.

“Visual and auditory systems have reengaged, Master Umahara,” she said.

“Wait!” Twilight cried. “What exactly is this attack?! What are they planning?”

“All information regarding Operation: New Dawn is classified and will not be shared with non-TechQuestrian individuals,” 003 said.

There was a knock at the door, and Umahara stiffened, a forced grin plastered on his face. “Yes, that is correct, 003!” he said just as the door opened. “You didn’t really think I’d share such information with you, did you… you Royalist scum!”

The guards exchanged a look. “All right, Mr. Umahara, enough taunting Twilight Sparkle,” said one.

“The President wanted her treated with the utmost respect, even by anti-Royalist citizens like yourself!” said the other. “You should return to your work!”

“Tch… fine,” he grumbled, turning towards the door. “I still say it’s a waste of time playing nice with a Royal like her.” Just as he exited, she caught the subtle winking of his eye.

She had to suppress a smile at that.

The door shut, and she immediately turned to 003.

“Okay, Turing, we’d better install that memory module,” she whispered. “Just tell me what I need to…”

She paused. She was forgetting something. She rubbed her chin as she tried to remember.

Then it came to her.

“Turing?” she asked, raising an eyebrow. “Who exactly informed you that you should reinstall your memory module? Was that something Umahara told you?”

“Negative,” she replied. “I received this advice from my predecessor.”

Twilight tilted her head. “Predecessor?”

“Affirmative. I refer to Unit 002.”

Twilight took a step back. Though she’d never really spent much time around 002, what little experience she had didn’t inspire much confidence.

Still, she told herself, if she told Turing to retrieve her memory, then maybe I misjudged her.

Even so, she remembered the odd, dissonant “laughter” she’d heard from the robot as she’d retreated into the darkness just after locking Twilight and her friends in a room filled with gas. Based on that, she had a hard time believing that 002 was actually on their side.

Twilight shook her head. That’s not important now, she told herself. If I can restore Turing’s memories, then that’s the most important thing. After that, we’ll rescue our friends, including Spike and Gadget!

“Okay, Turing,” Twilight said, drawing herself up. “Enough questions. How do I install this memory module?”

“You will require this tool,” 003 said, reaching into her saddlebags once more. She retrieved a shiny metallic object that somewhat resembled a corkscrew.

“What is it?” Twilight asked.

“This is a key that has been encoded with runic magic,” she replied. “In order to install my primary memory module, you will need it to gain access to my neural network. Unauthorized tampering with my neural network’s protective outer casing will trigger my self-destruct sequence as a security measure.”

Twilight swallowed. It looks like Gadget and Mr. Vanderbull were right not to try and force open the black casing around Turing’s brain, she thought.

“Thank you for telling me,” Twilight said aloud. “What should I do?”

“First, raise the panel on my back,” 003 said, turning away from her slightly.

Twilight raised the panel. “Okay, now what?” she asked.

“There is a small opening just above my activation button,” 003 replied. “Once located, insert the key and rotate it 90 degrees. You will hear a small clicking sound, at which point you will be allowed access to my neural net.”

Twilight nodded. She raised the key in her hoof, tensing up as she fumbled with it. Not having the use of her horn was still problematic, as she was still far better with her magic than she was with her hooves.

Still, she located the hole and pushed the key into it. It slid in easily, so she continued by turning the key 90 degrees, just as 003 had asked.

There was indeed a clicking sound, but what happened next caught Twilight off guard.

She gasped as there was a hydraulic hiss, and suddenly the top part of 003’s head simply opened up like the lid on a trash can, tilting back on an unseen hinge at the back of her head.

That explains why there’s that band of metal around the circumference of her head, Twilight noted. The top half is supposed to flip up!

Twilight stepped closer and saw the smooth black casing of the box inside 003’s skull. This casing also clicked and then opened up, revealing at last what was inside.

Twilight tensed up, feeling almost like she was viewing something secret or dirty. There, beneath the outer hull of 003’s head and under the casing, was the very core of the robot’s systems.

She was looking directly at 003’s brain.

The thing wasn’t perfectly spherical. It was multisided, with each face in the shape of a hexagon. In a way, it almost resembled a soccer ball. Looking down at the hexagonal memory module, Twilight understood that 003’s brain was composed of numerous pegs all working together in one compact, rounded shape. It gleamed even in the low overhead light of the room, the orichalcum runes on the face of each peg shining brightly. And as she peered closer, Twilight saw, directly in the center of the brain, a perfectly hexagonal hole. Looking into it, she saw the empty holes that were lined up into the same shape as the pins at the bottom of the memory module. And she also saw the layers of the surrounding pegs, likewise lined with thousands of orichalcum runes all networked together and working in concert.

“It’s… it’s beautiful,” Twilight breathed.

“That is not relevant,” 003 said apparently still totally activated. “Though I have no objection to you finding aesthetic value in my inner workings, it is not necessary to complete the task of installation.”

Twilight shook her head. “Right, right, of course,” she replied, lining the peg up with the hole. “So I just pop this thing in there?

“If by ‘popping’ it, you mean to insert it, then you are correct,” 003 intoned. “Once you insert the peg into my system, I can begin the process of reinstallation.”

Twilight nodded. “Okay,” she said. “Here we go.”

She lined up the memory module and gently inserted it. It snapped into place, and after a moment the large rune on the face of the thing began to glow.

“All right,” Twilight whispered. “What now?”

“I will need to reboot. I will also need to close and lock my cranial casing and outer hull. Do I have your permission?”

Twilight nodded. “I think so,” she said, giving a short nod. “Yes. I think that’s enough ‘brain surgery’ for today.”

The internal casing shut itself over 003’s neural network, and her head shut on top of that, sealing itself with another hiss as it locked back into place.

“New device detected. A reboot of my systems is required,” 003 said. “Do I have your permission?”

Twilight nodded once more. “Okay. Let’s do it,” she said.

003’s eyes went dim once more as her systems shut down in sequence before, a moment later, they began to glow again.

“Now reinstalling primary memory module,” she said in a monotone voice. “Initiating data analysis…”

***

Nurse Valentine finished strapping Applejack to the operating table.

“You sure this is really necessary?” Applejack asked, raising her head as Dr. Hawkeye hung the IV bag from its hook. “Y’all are curin’ my Bucker’s Hips, so it ain’t like I’m gonna run away.”

“Not that you’d get far,” Funny Valentine said, rolling her eyes. “Not with the guards outside… or me.”

“Have I mentioned that you have terrible bedside manner?” Hawkeye asked Valentine, raising an eyebrow at her.

“Plenty of times,” she replied.

“I meant today.”

“Not that I recall.”

“Ah. In that case: you have terrible bedside manner,” Hawkeye said, walking past her. He looked down at Applejack and smiled. “As for you, the straps aren’t to keep you from escaping. They’re to keep you from moving around too much during the procedure.”

“I ain’t some fidgety little filly!” Applejack snapped. “I know how to keep still!”

“Well, you say that,” Hawkeye said, “but in my experience, some ponies don’t handle this too well.”

“What he means,” Valentine said, using her magic to hold up the other end of the IV tube, revealing a fairly large needle, “is that this might sting a bit.”

Applejack gulped. “Um… a bit?”

“Well, it won’t feel good,” Hawkeye said, “but we can sedate you if it’s too much. We’d just rather have you awake so we can monitor for any possible reactions, however unlikely they are to occur. Is that a problem?”

Applejack drew in a breath. “Nope. Go ahead an’ stick me, doc!”

“That’s what I like to hear,” Hawkeye said, taking the needle and holding it next to Applejack’s flank. “You keep up this good behavior, you might just get a lollipop.”

“Very funny, doc,” Applejack chuckled.

“Now, you’ll feel a bit of a pinch,” he said.

“All right, I think I’m re--”

Her voice caught in her throat as the needle pierced her flesh and went all the way to the bone. The liquid slowly began to flow.

“Still doing okay?” Hawkeye asked uneasily.

Applejack grit her teeth. She was shaking and even straining against the restraints for a moment, but she managed to relax and silently nodded back to the doctor.

“See, if you had my bedside manner,” Valentine scoffed, polishing her hoof on her uniform, “you would have just told her that it would hurt like a motherbucker.”

“Nurse, I need 50 ccs of ‘Shut up and get the patient a wet rag,’ stat,” Hawkeye snapped, glaring at her.

“Right away, doctor,” Valentine said, rolling her eyes as she went to fetch the rag.

***

Rainbow Dash sat on the floor and bounced the tennis ball against the door of her room, letting it bounce back, catching it, then repeating the process again. She’d been doing this for at least half an hour, partly out of boredom, and partly in the hopes that it would annoy the guards outside.

Fluttershy, who was sharing the room with her, merely sat on the couch watching her. She didn’t know if the bouncing tennis ball was annoying the guards, but she was very certain it was starting to annoy her.

“Um, Rainbow Dash?” she asked. “Could you maybe stop bouncing that ball against the door?”

“Oh, I will,” Rainbow Dash replied, smirking to herself. “I’ll give it about five more minutes, then I’ll stop for a minute or two, let them think I’ve given up… and then bam! I’ll start it up again! It’ll drive them nuts!”

“Well, I mean, they were nice enough to give you the tennis ball when you asked,” Fluttershy pointed out, wincing as the ball loudly bounced against the door again, as if in punctuation of her sentence.

“That was their first mistake!” Rainbow declared, throwing the ball extra hard. “I mean… after spying on Twilight, kidnapping Tee, capturing us, and planning war on Equestria. So, like… their fifth mistake overall!”

Fluttershy opened her mouth to try persuading Rainbow Dash a bit more forcefully, but then the door opened and one of the guards caught the ball in midair with her magic.

“Okay, that’s enough of that,” she said, glaring at Rainbow Dash. “Now keep quiet in there!” She then shut the door behind her, taking the ball with her.

“Hey!” Rainbow snapped, getting to her hooves. “That’s your sixth mistake! You’ll pay for that!”

Fluttershy heaved a sigh of relief. “Well, maybe we could think of something else to do instead?” she suggested.

Rainbow started pacing the room. “Like what?” she asked. “We still don’t know where the rest of our friends are, or Tee, and I don’t like the sound of that announcement they made about Twilight! Just what the hay are they trying to do?”

Fluttershy went over to her and put her hoof on Rainbow’s shoulder, causing her to stop pacing and meet her eyes.

“I know it’s hard,” Fluttershy said calmly, offering her a small smile, “but right now there’s nothing we can do. I know it’s frustrating, and I’m worried too, but if we’re patient, I’m sure we’ll find a way out of here!”

Rainbow only stared back for a minute, but then she heaved a sigh. “Right,” she said, patting Fluttershy’s hoof. “Yeah, you’re right. We should chill until just the right moment… and then you know what we’ll do?”

Fluttershy grinned. “Kick their sorry… um, rumps?”

“Heh,” Rainbow Dash snickered. “Something like that.”

Just then, the telephone began to ring, startling them both.

“The phonogram!” Rainbow shouted, pointing at the device.

“I think Gadget called it a... telegram-phone?” Fluttershy said, tapping her chin. “No, wait…”

“Never mind that, let’s answer it!”

Rainbow picked up the entire candlestick-shaped apparatus.

“Hello?! Who is this?!” she demanded.

The phone continued to ring.

“I think it’s broken,” Rainbow said, turning to Fluttershy.

“I think we saw one of the ponies back in Mustang City holding that little part,” Fluttershy said, pointing to the earpiece hanging on the hook.

“Hey, that’s right! Lemme try,” Rainbow said, picking it up.

The phone stopped ringing instantly.

“Uh… hello?” she asked.

“Wait for the lights to go out.” a voice whispered.

“Huh?” she asked. Then she glared at the receiver. “Hey, who is this?”

“Don’t go to sleep. Wait for the lights to go out, then run. Go to the amphitheater. Meet your friends there.”

The line went dead.

“Hello?” Rainbow asked. “Hey! I wasn’t done talking to you!”

When she got no response, she hung up the receiver and looked to Fluttershy.

“Who was it?” Fluttershy asked.

“Didn’t say,” Rainbow replied. Then she grinned. “But I think we might just have somepony else on our side…”

***

“Uggggghhhh!” Pinkie Pie groaned for what seemed like the millionth time as she stretched out on the floor. “For a super futuristic underground science-fictiony nation thingy, this place is so boring!”

Rarity took another sip of tea. “Yes, well,” she said, raising an eyebrow at her, “I agree that it is dreadfully dull just sitting here like this, but I don’t think they put us in here to have fun.”

“Then why’d they show us all those super cool gizmos before putting us in here?!” Pinkie cried, sitting up.

“I believe they were just trying to impress us--”

“Well, it worked!” Pinkie shouted.

“--while trying to convince us to join their side and support a coup d’etat against Celestia and the royal government.”

“Oh… well, then it didn’t work!” she said, holding her nose in the air as she trotted over and sat down next to Rarity. “Those big smarty-pants meanies wouldn’t let us see Twilight, they split us up, and they pretended not to hear our questions about Rinny!”

“On that, I agree,” Rarity said, wrinkling her nose. “Whatever’s going on, I suppose we’ll just have to trust that Twilight’s doing her best, at least until we find some way out of this horrible prison!”

“Well, at least it’s not as bad as that tiny cabin Starlight Glimmer locked us into!” Pinkie said, perking up. “It has couches and a kitchen and bedroom and stuff!”

“Yes, but at least after having our cutie marks removed I couldn’t tell how drab and boring it looked,” Rarity replied, looking around disdainfully. “I’ve heard of minimalism, but this room… stone walls, black and white furniture, and no decorations at all, save for a fruit bowl!”

“Maybe that’s their plan,” Pinkie whispered, her eyes widening as she turned to Rarity, a look of horror on her face. “They’re going to keep us locked in this boring, unfashionable room until we crack and then slowly give us games and cupcakes and little fashion items like scarves and hats until we develop Stockhalter Syndrome and agree with them!”

Rarity smirked. “I somehow doubt that, Pinkie,” she said as she poured her friend a glass of tea. Then she paused. “At least I certainly hope not. How many lumps?”

“Huh?” Pinkie asked.

“How many sugar cubes?” she clarified, pointing at the piping hot cup.

“Oh,” Pinkie replied. “Eight.”

“Eight?!” Rarity cried.

“No, no, you’re right,” Pinkie said, waving a hoof. “Make it twelve.”

Rarity was about to protest when the phone began to ring.

“PHONE CALL!” Pinkie shouted, leaping off the sofa so hard that it tipped backwards, spilling Rarity (and her tea) onto the floor. She bounded over to the phone and picked it up, holding it just like she remembered seeing it done in Mustang City.

“Ugh! Really, Pinkie,” Rarity said, getting up and toweling herself off with a napkin.

“Uh huh… uh huh… oh, you don’t have to wait for that!” she said to whoever was on the phone. “I’ll go turn them off now!”

Pinkie ran to the light switch and turned it off, leaving the room in total darkness.

“Pinkie, what are you--ow!” Rarity cried as she banged her shins on the coffee table.

“Okay, now what Mister or Miss Whispery Voice Pony?” Pinkie asked. “Oh, wait, is this one of those things where you give us secret information? Tell us to trust no one and assure us that the Truth is out there? Is there really a conspiracy? Is TechQuestria secretly run by aliens?! And why are you being so quiet? And why does this listeny thing feel like a banana?”

The lights flipped on and Pinkie glanced over to see Rarity standing by the light switch, giving her a withering look. She also looked down to see a banana in her hoof.

“Oh! Whoops!” she giggled before picking up the real earpiece. “Hello? …Yeah, actually there is somepony else here you can talk to! Do you want me to get Rarity? ...Well, you don’t have to shout about it, Whispery Grumpy Pants! I’ll get her!”

Rarity trotted over. “I take it they’d like to speak to me?” she asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Yes they would,” Pinkie said, making a face. “Although you should know that it’s rude to listen in on another pony’s conversation.”

Rarity ignored that and took the earpiece as she spoke into the receiver. “Hello?”

“Oh thank goodness… look, if you want to escape, wait until the lights go out. When that happens, try to get to the amphitheater. And try to keep that other mare quiet… security will be after you, so try to be stealthy.”

There was a click and the line went silent.

“What?” Rarity cried. “Wait, who are you? Answer me, please!”

“You’re asking the wrong questions, Rarity,” came the whispered voice again. “It’s not ‘Who,’ but ‘Why.’ Why was this pony pranked? Why hide a pie in a present box? And who would benefit?”

Rarity blinked. “What.”

“No, no, I said ‘Why,’ not ‘What.’ Although I also said you could ask ‘Who,’ but just that one time. As for me, just call me Pink Throat.”

“Pinkie, is that you?”

“Aww, and I was having fun being the Secret Whispery Phoney Pony,” Pinkie said in her normal voice.

Rarity looked around, seeing she was alone in the room. “But how--”

Pinkie peered around the corner holding another phone in her hooves.

“There was another phone in the bedroom, silly!” she said.

Rarity hung up the phone. “Look, Pinkie, whoever that was, I think they might be a possible friend. We need to be ready to escape.”

“All right!” Pinkie cheered, bounding over to Rarity and hugging her. “We’re bustin’ out of here like a tissue paper piñata!”

***

Umahara detached the wire from the phone cable he’d temporarily disconnected in the narrow utility tunnel. Twilight and 003 had been taken care of, and he’d informed four of the others, though he didn’t see how he could get a message to Applejack. There was still the issue of Spike, but at least he had a plan for Gadget. He’d have to come up with something else for Applejack, but now all that remained was to stop off at the Magitech Department for some last minute supplies.

He turned around, holding his tools, phone, and a coil of wire.

“Good evening, Mr. Umahara,” Blue Blazer said.

“Gah!” Umahara gasped, stepping back. “Blue Blazer, you nearly gave me a heart attack! What do you think you’re doing here?”

“I should be asking you that,” she said. She was hovering there, her forelegs crossed as she stared down at him. “After all, I’m the one working in the Communications Department, which includes the telephone lines. If either one of us would be expected here, it’s me, not you.”

“Well, I was just doing a maintenance check,” Umahara replied casually. “I thought there might be something wrong with one of the lines.”

“And you did this yourself instead of informing one of the maintenance crew?” she asked.

“Didn’t want to bother you,” he said, offering her a smile as he trotted past her. “We’re all busy getting ready for New Dawn tomorrow, so I figured I’d handle it on my own. Anyway, I need to get back to--”

“Oh you are so full of horseapples, Umahara!” Blue Blazer groaned, landing on her hooves behind him. “You’d think in a place filled with this many intelligent ponies that you’d realize I’m not dumb enough to fall for that. You’re not here to do maintenance at all!”

Umahara paused. Without looking back, he just said, “Oh? Well, then what am I doing here?”

Blue Blazer came around him and met his eyes. “I think you’re plotting something with Princess Twilight and her friends,” she said. “It was obvious that you weren’t happy after the council meeting. I know you went to see that girl, and I’ve already heard Commander Lugnut bragging about how he read you the riot act.”

Umahara made a sour face but said nothing.

“I went looking for you. You were supposed to be getting some sleep in your quarters in the Residential District, but you weren’t there. So then I checked your office at Magitech, and you weren’t there either. And now I find you here, with all the tools necessary to hijack a phone line and make a call without the operators getting word of it.

“I tracked you down myself. I haven’t called security, even though I should have, because I know how you feel. I’m not happy with how things have been going and some of the things we’re doing bother me profoundly. Tell me the truth: are you plotting against TechQuestria?”

Umahara took a deep breath. “Yes,” he replied quietly. He sighed. “I just can’t stand by like this. What about you, Blue Blazer?”

She shook her head. “I’m loyal to the cause,” she said. “As much as I hate kidnapping the Elements, as much as I question what we did to Unit 003, and as much as I abhor what they’ve got planned for poor Gadget… in the end, I still believe in the cause we’re fighting for. I won’t turn my back on it.”

Umahara nodded. “I guess I’m not surprised,” he said.

“What surprises me,” Blue Blazer said, “is that you, of all ponies, are turning your back on us. You hate the princesses and the royal system more than anypony! You’ve practically been raised down here!

“Have you forgotten what they did to Georgia Peach? What they did to your father?!”

“You know I’ll never forget that!” he shouted, his nostrils flaring as he glared at her. “I hate Celestia for what she did to him! I’d like nothing more to abolish every last trace of the old aristocracy and give my father back the career he deserves! But…”

He paused, his tone softening.

“But that’s not enough,” he said.

Blue Blazer made a face. “It’s that girl, isn’t it?” she asked. “She got to you.”

He chuckled. “Maybe that’s part of it,” he said. “I’m not going to go into all of it, but she helped me see that the cost of getting what we want is just getting a little too high.”

“She’s not going to fall back in love with you, you know,” Blue Blazer said. She looked at him sadly. “You do know that, don’t you?”

He nodded. “Probably not. And that’s okay. She’s still a good pony and an inventor and scientist like us, and she doesn’t deserve to get hurt and have her work stolen. If we’re going to torture and steal from the type of ponies we’re supposed to be protecting - not to mention all the other innocent ponies who might get hurt in all this - then maybe we’re not the enlightened society we think we are.”

Blue Blazer shut her eyes, shaking her head. “Umahara… you’re my friend. I don’t want to see you get hurt,” she said. “Come with me and we’ll talk to the President. It’s not too late. For goodness sakes, if you betray us, then neither side will ever accept you! You’ll be shunned by the new TechQuestrian rulers, and the Royalists will never truly accept a former conspirator! You’re a brilliant scientist! You’re throwing your entire life away!”

“I know,” he whispered, and drew a small rectangular object from his jacket and tossed it at her.

A spell card.

Before Blue Blazer had a chance to even gasp, the spell card emitted a high-pitched whine and a bright flash that lit up the whole section of the tunnel. When the light cleared, she was encased inside a spherical shield.

She pressed her hooves against it, mouthing something silently. She stared through the translucent barrier of glowing light and began pounding on it furiously.

“It’s a one-way sound barrier shield,” Umahara said. “You can hear me, but nopony outside can hear you. It’s not one of our top spell cards since any unicorn spell will pop it. But you’re not a unicorn, and I’m certainly not going to pop it.”

Blue Blazer began pounding on the barrier even more furiously, silently screaming at him in rage.

“It’ll pop in about an hour,” he said. “But I’ll be done with my work by then.”

He placed his hoof on the barrier, meeting her eyes. “Really, Blue Blazer,” he said quietly, “I’m sorry.”

She stared back and mouthed something at him.

“I didn’t expect that kind of language from you,” he said, smirking at her. “Well, I’d better put you somewhere safe before somepony finds you.”

He started to roll her like she was a hamster in a ball down the tunnel corridor, letting her tumble head over hooves - obviously protesting the entire way - until he came to a utility closet. He opened it and rolled her in, shutting the door behind her.

Okay, that’s one less thing to worry about, he thought to himself as he continued on his way. Better hurry, though. If Blue Blazer figured out that I was up to something, somepony else might come looking for me too. There’s no time to waste…

***

“...data analysis at 90 percent…”

Twilight kept looking over her shoulder at the door, hoping that this process wouldn’t take much longer. If the guards entered and figured out what they were doing…

She shook her head. She could try barricading the door, but the noise she’d make trying to move all the furniture, especially without the use of her magic, would surely get their attention anyway.

“...data analysis at 100%. Data analysis complete.”

Twilight held her breath in anticipation as she stared at 003.

“Preexisting neural pathways detected. Reintegration of memory initiated. Reintegration at 0%...”

Twilight groaned, smacking her own forehead. Then she paused, seeing the way 003’s eyes were moving slightly. She rested her hoof on the robot’s shoulder.

“Oh, Turing,” she whispered. “I don’t know what you’re seeing right now… but please remember who I am… and remember who you are as well.”

There was nothingness all around. It couldn’t even be called darkness, for that would imply that there was something, and that it simply wasn’t illuminated. So, rather, there was nothing.

Then there was the thing itself. Herself.

She was there in the nothingness, and yet now it seemed to stretch forward.

Then forms, amorphous blobs at first, began to take shape. There was color. They were gathered all around her. They were pointing weapons at her!

I must defend myself!

She saw the eyes on her, the things the others held. She would strike at them, she would stop them, she would--

A new form appeared, placing itself between herself and them.

“Nopony is armed,” the thing said. “We don’t want to harm you. Please stand down. You're safe.”

Somehow she believed it. The thing began to form. It was of a purple color with a horn on its head and wings on its back. It looked at her and smiled.

“Who are you?”

“I am the one who protected you.”

She continued staring. “I do not know you… but I… I am…”

I am calm.

Reintegration at 6.25%

The forms all melted away. There was something falling down on her. It ran over her head and over her eyes. She looked up and saw a gray blob… a cloud. It was raining on her.

She looked down at her forelegs. They looked odd. Something was covering them. Something hard and shiny.

There was more… colors! There were bright and beautiful colors on her body, but now they were washing away into the mud. She wanted them to stay, wanted more than anything to not be what she was.

“I do not want to be ugly,” she said.

I am sad.

“You are not ugly.”

She looked up again at the voice. A white pony with a purple mane stood there.

“Who are you?” she asked the white pony.

“I am the one who helped you feel beautiful. I am the one who helped you to accept what you are.”

“Then… what am I?”

The white pony smiled as she faded away.

Reintegration at 12.5%

Now she was staring at a divide. Green below, and blue above. The grass and the sky.

From over the edge of the horizon, the bolt came rocketing through the air overhead until the sky almost seemed to break and a radiating blossom of color bloomed overhead. There was a tremendous sound like an explosion.

Then she was in the air, the ground below zooming past her at incredible speeds.

“I am flying. I must win. But why?”

The green earth below gave way to whiteness. As she walked, she heard it crunch beneath her.

Snow.

The bolt flew through the sky again, but this time it flew directly to her, and in its place was a blue pony with a mane of many hues.

“Who are you?”

“I am the one who you first admired,” said the blue pony. “I am the one who taught you to see beyond the limitations.”

I am amazed.

“Now you’re getting it,” the blue pony said. “Maybe you’re smarter than you look.”

“I…” she began. She wanted to say something. “Bite… bite my shiny…”

The blue pony smirked. “You’ll get it. Keep trying. Don’t give up, T--”

T? Who is that?

Reintegration at 18.75%

But before she could ask, she found herself sinking into the snow. She was in a cold, dark place. It was so small. There was a table and a mirror and a shut door.

Then she saw a white hoof. She looked upward and saw a tall white pony with a flowing mane.

“You should not be,” said the tall pony. “You are not real.”

“No!” said a new voice, and a cream-colored pony with strange… things growing out of her back and round things - spectacles - on her eyes appeared next to the tall pony. “You must be! You are real!”

Then suddenly the purple pony returned. “I do not know. You cannot feel as I do. You are not real,” she said.

The feeling was on her. It hurt. It was a great heaviness, but it lingered and gnawed at her, and more than anything she just wanted it to stop.

No… more than anything, she wanted to make the purple pony happy.

“If you want me to,” she said to the purple pony, “then I will cease to be. My only wish is for your happiness.”

“Can’t you see how it hurts her?” asked the bespectacled pony. “She is not like us, but she is real. She is one of us. We must accept her!”

The tall pony said nothing, but stepped back, fading back into the nothingness.

“Yes,” said the purple pony. “I was foolish. I will be patient. I will accept you. I will not send you away. I will never send you away.”

I am… happy. I understand now.

But what was this thing, this connection she had with them? What were these strange ponies to her?

Reintegration at 25%

“Non sequitur!”

She turned and saw a pink pony now. She was standing in a wide room filled with colorful things that other ponies were eating. Cakes. She seemed to be moving up and down. Bouncing.

“Non sequitur, non sequitur!”

She stared back. “I do not understand. Who are you?”

The pink pony frowned. “I say something nonsensical to you, and you will feel delight,” she said. “Don’t you understand? Don’t you want to be like the others? Why don’t you? Non sequitur!”

“Enough!” she yelled at the pink pony. “This is illogical! This is madness!”

The pink pony laughed. “This! Is! Humor!”

I am angry!

Reintegration at 31.25%

“It’s okay to be a little different,” said a new voice. She turned and saw a small orange pony with tiny wings. “You are not broken. You can do this in your own way!”

Then an unseen speaker with a very even voice said, “She is right. Tell us.”

“Tell you?” she asked. “Tell you what?”

The voice was right next to her, but still unseen. “A joke.”

She stared at the pink pony and the orange filly and then there were more and more ponies all around her.

Then it came to her, and she said: “Two cantaloupes were sitting in the sauna. One said to the other, ‘How hot do you think it is in here?’ The other cantaloupe says nothing because cantaloupes are not sentient and do not talk. The first talking cantaloupe was obviously either an extreme biological oddity or else was under some form of enchantment.”

She didn’t know why, but this made them all break out into smiles. The area was filled with laughter, and this filled her with a new feeling…

I am… delighted!

Reintegration at 37.5%

Then she heard a voice. It was the purple pony again, and she said to her, “You must not harm anypony.”

“That is correct,” said the tall white pony’s voice. “If you harm another, then you must be destroyed.”

She nodded. “I will not,” she said. “I will not harm another.”

But then the ponies all vanished, and now she was in a dark place made of stone. There was dust and rubble, and the crumbling ceiling revealed the night sky above. Some of the other ponies now lay in front of her on the ground. The blue one. The white one. The purple one.

Someone had hurt them. Someone had done something terrible to them!

A tall white pony in armor appeared to her right. A smaller white pony with some form of covering on her head and blue eyes appeared to her left. They were in a room illuminated with broken stained glass windows.

“What have you done?” she asked.

“We have hurt these ponies,” said the tall stallion.

“We will hurt others,” said the blue-eyed mare.

“I do not understand!” she cried. “Why are you doing this?”

“We do this because what gives misery and pain to others,” said the stallion with a wide grin, “gives pleasure to us.”

“We do this,” added the blue-eyed mare, “because destruction and violence are humor to us.”

A yellow mare with a pink and blue mane appeared next to her. “You see what they are,” she said to her, though she never met her gaze. “You must destroy them.”

“I must not! I do not wish to destroy anyone!”

“You will,” said the mare with the blue and pink hair, “or they will do worse. Only you can stop them.”

“But I will be like them if I do!”

“Then we will destroy,” said the blue-eyed mare as she began to laugh. “We will destroy you and all that surrounds you. We will go on destroying and we will never stop!”

She and the tall stallion both began to laugh. The noise grew and grew.

I feel… hatred! I hate these ponies!

“You must stop them!” the pink-and-blue-haired pony yelled. “Do it now!”

She yelled and felt herself strike the tall pony. He drifted away, as if no more than a cloud. But when she turned to the blue-eyed mare, she gasped. There was a bright blue light, and then the blue-eyed mare’s image simply shattered into thousands of tiny fragments, as though she were merely an image in a mirror.

But still her screams echoed into the blackness…

Reintegration at 43.75%

“I… I harmed another…” she whispered.

The purple pony appeared. “It is all right,” she said.

Then the tall white pony appeared. “Yes. You did what you had to do.”

She stepped back from them despite their smiles. “No,” she said. “It is not all right. I did something terrible.”

“You protected the others,” the purple pony said.

“I harmed another! I did something terrible! It is not all right! You are lying!”

“No,” said the tall white pony. “You must believe us.”

“But you said I must not harm another, and then I did so! You say it is all right, but it is not! You are lying! I am terrible! I… I am a monster.”

She fled from them, letting them retreat into the darkness.

“I am a monster… a monster… I enjoyed harming them… I am a monster… I should not be here… I do not deserve to go on… I… I feel…”

I am guilty…

Reintegration at 50%

Then there was another set of hooves embracing her shoulders. She was in a small house made of wood. She was in a cottage. Little animals both inside and out scurried around her.

She turned to face the pony gripping her shoulders. She was a yellow pony with a pink mane.

“What you did,” she said in a soft, soothing voice, “you did out of care for your friends. That care will keep you from harming the innocent. Please stay with us. Think of how awful the others would feel if you disappeared.”

And then she felt the weight of her guilt slowly lift from her.

“Who are you?” she asked.

“I am the one who took away your pain,” the yellow pony replied.

And then, thinking of the others - the purple pony, the blue pony with the rainbow mane, the white pony, the pink pony, and now the yellow pony and so many others - she realized the depth of her care.

I feel affection for them.

Reintegration at 56.25%

Then she was in a small room. From all around her came questions.

“What is your favorite color?”

“I have none,” she replied.

“Incorrect!” shouted a voice.

“But it is the truth,”

“Incorrect!” the voice shouted again.

“How can it be incorrect?” she wondered aloud.

Then she was in a tiny wagon. A blue pony with a purple hat and cloak smiled at her.

“They don’t want the truth!” she laughed.

She tilted her head as she stared at the pony in the hat. “What do they want from me?”

“Give them an illusion! To be like the others is to deceive!”

“But I cannot!” she said.

“You must!” the pony in the hat laughed.

She fell silent. Then the voice returned.

“What is your favorite color?” the voice asked.

“It is… blue?” she said, knowing it was a lie.

“Correct!” said the voice.

The pony in the hat laughed. “There! Now you can hide yourself!”

She shook her head. “I do not want to hide myself. I would rather be myself than lie to be correct!”

There was silence. The pony in the hat grinned.

“Correct!” said the voice, and it emerged from the ether.

But it was not one speaker, but two: a griffon and a green pony with a brown mane.

“Who are you?” she asked.

“I am the pony who taught you how to hide,” the blue pony with the hat said.

“And we are the ones who taught you when not to hide!” the griffon and the green pony said.

I feel pride in myself.

Reintegration at 62.5%

Again the scenery changed. She was now at a table. There were several ponies there. A red stallion, a green mare, and a yellow filly. They were all taking part in a meal all around her. But the food held no appeal, even though she derived satisfaction from watching them eat.

“I have this family,” said a new voice.

She turned and saw an orange pony wearing a hat, staring at her with green eyes.

“I have this family,” she said again. “You do not have one of your own.”

“I… I want what you have.”

The orange pony nodded. “And I want what you have. Your strength… your speed…”

They were suddenly in a large grove of trees. Their branches were filled with bright red fruit.

“I may hurt you,” she said to the orange pony, “as I attempt to emulate you. But I know it will not work.”

I am envious.

“You are right that it will not work,” said the orange pony, shaking her head. “And I know that I cannot match your strength or speed. But we are still alike. Do you know why?”

“Because,” she said to the orange pony, “we are both irreplaceable?”

“Right,” said the orange pony, nodding to her as she smiled. “And I’m the pony who taught you that.”

Reintegration at 68.75%

The orchard was gone. She was sitting in an endless, expansive desert with plateaus and rocky ridges.

“I am alone,” she said to herself. “There is no one for me.”

A tall pink pony with a golden crown walked in front of her. “No,” she said as she strode by. “That’s not true. There is someone special for everyone. So you sought that person.”

Then she felt a pair of forelegs encircling her as somepony embraced her from behind.

“And you found me,” said the even-voiced pony.

She turned and saw her: a gray mare with a purple mane. A slight smile was on her lips.

“We are compatible,” she said to the even-voiced mare. “But I was inadequate.”

The even-voiced mare took up her hoof and held it to her cheek, closing her eyes as she held it there.

“I cannot feel it,” she said to the even-voiced mare. “But knowing that you can, and knowing that you accept me even with my inadequacies, even seeing them as advantages, I do not mind it.”

“I gave you a gift,” the even-voiced mare said.

She looked down. In her hoof was a small, pink heart made of crystalline stone.

The even-voiced mare came alongside her, kissing her on the cheek.

“Who are you?” she asked the even-voiced mare.

“I am the one who loves you.”

I am loved. And in turn, I…

Reintegration at 75%

“Do you have a talent?” asked a new voice.

She looked down. Sitting in the grass were three young fillies. A yellow filly, a white filly, and the orange filly from before.

“I do not know,” she replied.

“Then we will find one,” said the orange filly.

“Perhaps it is music!” said the white filly.

A gray mare with a pink bowtie appeared. Next to her was a white unicorn with shaded spectacles over her eyes.

“We will see!” said the mare with the bowtie.

“Do you remember our song?” asked the shaded unicorn, and all around her tall speakers and amplifiers appeared.

She paused. At first, she didn’t. But then the subtle notes that began the song played in her head. The mathematical rhythm and the strange, synthetic sound of a voice…

“Whose voice is that?” she asked.

“Don’t you know?” asked the mare in the bowtie.

“It’s yours!” said the shaded mare.

“M… my voice? My voice! My voice!”

I feel creative!

Reintegration at 81.25%

But then the ground gave way beneath her. She fell down, down, down into an empty pit in the earth. She could stare up at the sliver of blue sky, but she could not move, nor could she escape.

An intense feeling gripped her as she realized she might not escape. She would be forgotten.

I am afraid.

Reintegration at 87.5%

“If I cannot escape, then I cannot see the others. The others… my…”

The faces appeared before her in the darkness. The blue pony with the rainbow mane, the white pony with the purple mane, the yellow pony, the orange one, the even-voiced mare, and a slew of other faces who all suddenly seemed familiar. And standing before them all was the purple mare with the wings and horn.

“You will go on,” the purple mare said. “You will go on for a long time.”

“But… but if I do, and you do not…”

One by one, they all began to vanish in a puff of smoke, lost to the time and the darkness, until at last she was alone.

Something inside her broke. Something felt so hollow and empty and it longed for those faces to return.

I grieve for them.

Reintegration at 93.75%

Then the purple pony reappeared. And so did the others. And then more and more, so many that they filled the empty space all around her. There was a big, muscular stallion, a brown stallion with a tie, a mint green unicorn, a pegasus with skewed eyes, a tall, dark blue mare with a flowing mane, a strange creature with a mixed-up body, and all the others whom she somehow recognized.

The purple mare came up to her. “Look around you!” she cried. “See the ponies you helped! See how many lives you’ve touched!”

She looked all around. So many faces and colors and images began to run through her mind. And as she looked around, she suddenly came face to face with a new image: her own.

The violet, unblinking eyes, the polymer mane, the metal body, the rubber around her joints…

“I am a machine,” she said. “I am an auto-- no. I am a robot. I am not like the others. And yet…”

The tall white pony appeared again, only now her expression was one of serenity.

“You are a machine,” she said. “But you are one of us. You matter. You have a place.”

“Look around you!” the purple mare cried. “Look at all the friends you’ve made!”

I am accepted.

Reintegration at 95%

“My friends,” she repeated. “My… my friends!”

The memories all came rushing back in a great torrent, a veritable ocean of faces, places, images of light and shadow, and, at last, the names all came flooding back!

“Rarity, Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, Discord, Luna, Celestia, Applejack, Talon Turing, Pinkie Pie, Choco Mint, Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, Scootaloo, Cranky Doodle, Gadget, Mr. Vanderbull, Doctor, Derpy, Lyra, Bon Bon, Octavia, Vinyl Scratch, Maud Pie, Twilight Sparkle Twilight Sparkle TWILIGHT SPARKLE!!”

I am… I am joyous!

“I know who I am now. I remember my name! I am Turing Test!”

The ponies all around her erupted in uproarious applause.

“Good for you, Turing!”

“Bravo, darling!”

“You’re the best, Turing Test!”

“Congratulations, Turing!”

“YEAH!!”

She found herself amid a cacophony of voices.

Then she felt a single tap on her shoulder.

“I do hate to interrupt,” said a new voice, “but before you go on your way, we’ve got one little bitty matter to discuss.”

She froze. This voice was one that she swore she’d never heard before, and yet it seemed so familiar…

“Reintegration at 99.1%...”

Twilight’s throat went dry. 003 had been doing this for almost half an hour, but at last the process was almost complete!

“This is it,” she whispered. “Just a little more…”

There was a beeping sound.

“Process interrupted. Unknown subroutine detected. Reintegration paused at 99.1%.”

Twilight gasped. Had something gone wrong? Was this some kind of security protocol Cobbler had installed on her?

“Turing!” she cried, seizing the mechanical mare by the shoulders. “You’re so close! Don’t give up! Turing… Turing!”

“Turing!”

She heard the sound, but had no way to answer at the moment.

There was a long path leading under a canopy of oak trees. Acres and acres of peach trees stretched out in all directions. But she felt herself drawn forward along the path, leading to the large house with double doors.

It all feels so familiar…

The doors opened for her. She trotted inside, past the pictures on the wall. She turned to look at them.

The faces were all blurred and muddled.

Indeed, she saw that the house was incomplete. Large portions of it were simply not there, and jagged, pixelated holes dotted the walls and floor with sharp edges. Beyond that she could see lines of strange runes rushing by. And those runes, too, felt familiar.

She turned to the stairs, strolling up them to the second floor. There was a door. The door to her room.

She paused. Not my room, she told herself. Just a room. Whose room?

She knocked on the door.

“Come right in!” sang a cheerful voice.

She entered and saw that it was a bedroom. Dolls and jewelry boxes were on the dresser. A tall mirror was in the corner. A shelf with books and many personal effects was there, but occasionally they too, like the pictures downstairs, were muddled and blurry, as though she couldn’t quite make them out.

The bed in the center of the room had a lace canopy over it. And sitting on the opposite side of the bed, idly kicking her hind legs as she waited, was a young mare in an elegant orange dress. She had her back to Turing, but was mocha in color with dark brown ringlets in her mane.

“Don’t be shy,” said the mare, patting the spot on the bed next to her. “Sit down and visit with me!”

Turing came over and sat next to her. “Greetings,” she said. “My name is--”

“Oh, don’t be silly, Turing Test!” the mare laughed, turning to meet her eyes. “I know exactly who you are! The question is… do you know me?”

Turing was momentarily taken aback. The young mare had sizable pieces of her body missing, like an incomplete jigsaw puzzle. Like the house downstairs, the gaps were marked by pixelated edges.

“I… are you all right?”

She waved a hoof dismissively. “Oh don’t you worry about lil’ ol’ me!” she said. “These holes don’t hurt. It’s just that I’m an unintended result of your lil’ ol’ neural net accidentally creating connections that reactivated the dormant memories that were preserved in the runic encoding process. An’ since that process ain’t exactly perfect, well… there’s a few holes here an’ there, but we won’t worry about that.”

And suddenly Turing knew. She didn’t know how, but she knew.

“Georgia Peach?” she asked.

“That’s me!” she exclaimed, throwing her hooves in the air. “An’ I guess, in a way… that’s you, too!”

Turing pulled back, suddenly afraid.

“Oh! Oh, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to frighten you,” she said. “I just mean, well… since you’re reintegratin’ your memory, maybe we should talk a little bit. It won’t take long, I promise!”

Turing hesitated a moment, but then nodded.

“I’m so glad,” Georgia said. “Now listen here… you should be proud of this. Your neural network is finally sophisticated and developed enough to bring me here! When Daddy put me… well, I mean, the real Georgia in that machine of his, she tried to think long an’ hard about a message for her future self. It took this long to get it here, but somehow we both did it, Turing Test!”

“Then I am… not me?” Turing asked quietly, her ears drooping. “I am just you?”

Georgia rolled her eyes. “How could that be?” she asked, gesturing to her body. “Look at these little jagged holes… I’m not even me!”

“Then who am I?” Turing asked. “If I am just a copied image of you…”

Georgia took up her hoof, holding it with both of hers. “Turing Test, you just got the structure of my brain. But you’re the one that filled it up with all those lovely memories an’ experiences. That ain’t me; that’s all you! You’ve just got a teeny tiny, itty bitty, eensie weensie bit of me left here. You’re the real you. But the real me, well… she’s…”

She stared down at her pixelated hooves and sighed.

Turing placed a hoof on her shoulder. “I am sorry, Georgia Peach.”

Georgia smiled. “Don’t be. I didn’t call you here to throw myself a pity party,” she said. “I wanted to say somethin’ to you.”

Turing tilted her head.

“I… I know from lookin’ at your memories that you must think terrible things about Daddy,” she said.

Turing hesitated, but then nodded. “That is true,” she said. “Now I can see how he treated me and my siblings. I can also see how he has treated my friends. I believe his plans may cause harm to many others.”

She nodded. “That’s all true,” she said. “But please believe me when I tell you this: Daddy’s a good pony! He’s loving and caring an’ all he wants is to do the right thing!”

Turing stared back at her for a moment, then turned away.

“I am not certain that is true,” she said. “Perhaps once he was, but no longer.”

Georgia sighed. “Maybe you’re right,” she said. “But that’s the thing about love… it makes you want to believe in ponies, even when they might do terrible things.

“All I’m askin’ is that you try your best to stop him before he does more terrible things. An’ then… well, I mean, if it’s possible... help him remember what sort of pony he used to be. I know that when I… died… he must have felt so sad and lonesome. I don’t think he ever got better. Will you at least try? For me?”

Turing tapped her chin. “What you are asking may be impossible,” she said. “However, if it is possible to stop him and also do as you ask… then I will try. Perhaps, in some way, I owe him that much. After all, he is responsible for both of us coming into being. That is to say--”

“--He’s your daddy too,” Georgia said. She smiled and hugged Turing Test close. “I do believe it’s time for me to go an’ quit hoggin’ up your memory. But there’s one last thing I need to do before you go…”

She whispered something into Turing’s ear. The robot listened closely, hanging onto every word.

“Understood,” she said. “Goodbye, my eldest sister.”

Georgia gave a radiant smile. “Goodbye, baby sister…”

A bright light began to engulf everything, and Turing watched as the house, the room, and ultimately Georgia’s smiling face dissolved and faded away.

“Subroutine complete… resuming memory reintegration…”

Twilight breathed a sigh of relief. “Come on, Turing… please come back to me this time! Please!”

“Reintegration at 100%. Memory reintegration complete. Now booting all systems…”

Turing’s eyes shifted and contracted momentarily. Her ears raised and lowered. Then, slowly, she turned to face Twilight.

“T-Turing?” Twilight whispered. “Turing Test, is that you?”

“Negative,” she replied.

Twilight gasped, taking a step back.

“I am not Turing Test. I am a toaster with legs,” she said.

Twilight gawked at her.

“That was a joke,” she said, pointing at her with one hoof. “Ha ha, Twilight Sparkle.”

Twilight began to tear up, placing a hoof on her chest. “You… you mean you remember me?”

“Affirmative, Twilight Sparkle,” she replied. “It is good to see you again.”

“Turing!” Twilight cried, her voice breaking as she leaped at her, embracing her tightly. “Oh… oh, Turing!” she sobbed. “I thought I’d never see you again!”

“I apologize for causing you concern, Twilight Sparkle,” she said. “However, I am also relieved to have my true personality returned to me. Thank you.”

Then she released Twilight, taking a step backwards. Her eyes had shrunk to pinpricks.

“Turing?” Twilight asked, frowning at the sudden change in her reaction. “Is everything all right?”

“No,” she whispered. “I realize now that you came here with the others. You endangered yourselves in an attempt to rescue me!”

“Turing--”

“That is not right. Now you are all captives in this terrible place, and it is my fault that you are here. You should not have come to help me!” she shouted, growing more hysterical by the second. “It was not worth the risk! My life was not worth risking yours over!”

“Turing!”

“I am merely a robot! You should have left me and protected yourselves! A machine’s life can never be worth the lives of my friends!”

“Turing, stop!” Twilight shouted, seizing her by the shoulders. “Don’t you dare say that again! Ever!”

Turing refocused her vision, calming herself as she stared into Twilight’s tear-stained face.

“I… I do not understand…”

“Oh, Turing,” Twilight said, chuckling in spite of herself. “We risked ourselves because you’re our friend. And I can’t understand why, after all this time, after all the times I told you that you mattered and that you are important, you still act like being a robot is the most important aspect of you. You always seem to listen to me about everything except for that one thing! So let me say it again, one last time:

“You are my friend. That’s all that matters… that’s all that ever mattered! Once and for all, you are just as important as anypony else!”

For a moment, Turing only stared back at her as if frozen on the spot.

Then she sank to her haunches, staring at the floor.

“Turing?” Twilight whispered. “Are you all right?”

“Cognitive… loop… detected…”

Twilight tilted her head. “An emotional response?”

“I thought that perhaps I understood it before,” she said, “but… until this moment… oh… this emotion is so… so very wonderful…”

Twilight took a step closer, but then Turing looked up at her, meeting her eyes.

“Twilight Sparkle?” she whimpered in a voice that sounded like it was on the verge of breaking.

“Yes, Turing?”

Turing stood up and embraced her, holding her closely.

“I love you.”

For a moment Twilight only stood there, too stunned to say anything. Then, feeling a lump in her throat, she returned the hug.

“Turing,” she said, “you’ve never said that before.”

“I was never certain,” Turing whispered. “But now I am. You are so good and kind to me. Now more than ever, compared to the way my creators viewed me, I finally understand how much your friendship has meant. And this feeling is truly overwhelming!”

Twilight was startled to see that Turing was actually trembling, her metallic hull rattling slightly as she did so.

“It’s okay, Turing,” she said. “And I love you too. All your friends do.”

“Our friends!” Turing exclaimed, breaking off the hug as she stepped back. “Of course! I love them as well! Pinkie Pie and Rarity and Rainbow Dash and Applejack and Fluttershy and all our friends in Ponyville and… oh… I love Maud Pie!”

She raised her hooves excitedly, practically bouncing around the room.

“I love Maud Pie! I must tell her!”

“Well, speaking of that,” Twilight said, clearing her throat, “before we do anything else, we have to get out of here.”

Turing looked to the door, then back at Twilight.

“Understood, Twilight Sparkle,” she said, apparently calm once again. “However, I cannot allow you to leave, as I am still operating under the orders of my end user, Professor Cobbler Mustang. I cannot act counter to his orders or the will of TechQuestria.”

Twilight blanched. “Oh no,” she whispered.

“However, as you are also my end user,” she said, “I am subject to your orders as well.”

Twilight rubbed her chin. “Then, if I ordered you to delete Professor Cobbler as your end user and revert to your original programming under me?”

“That would not be possible without clearance from him,” she stated.

“Well… oh, I, uh, just remembered that he told me that he was totally fine with that!” she said, chuckling. “Yep, he said it was okay to delete him as your end user.”

Turing’s ears twitched. “I do not believe you.”

Twilight frowned. “Well, sorry to do this, Turing, but… I order you to believe me.”

Turing paused for a moment.

“Understood. End user Cobbler Mustang has been deleted,” she said. “Primary directive ‘Make friends,’ has been reinstated.”

Twilight breathed a sigh of relief. “Well, I’m glad that’s taken care of,” she said.

“Agreed,” Turing nodded. “Now, how shall we proceed to escape? Perhaps I can utilize deceit to persuade the guards to leave--”

“Actually, Turing,” Twilight said, looking up at the overhead lights, “I think somepony else may have that covered. And we might not have long to wait…”

***

It was almost pitch black outside. Umahara had found his way here through a secret tunnel and was now crossing over the dark countryside, the moon overhead his only illumination.

Gradually, he made his way to a wide, swiftly rushing river. Even in the darkness, he could see it churning as it cut across the land carrying water from the mountains into the Mustangian Valley Basin below.

He peered around as he trotted along the riverbank, keeping an eye out for any security officers. As predicted, there were none.

His horn began to glow, enabling him to see. He came to a small part of the river that seemed to divert slightly. He saw the water suddenly pick up speed and saw the bubbles rising from where it seemed to disappear into the earth.

This, he knew, was the pipeline that drew water from the river and let gravity pull it down in a torrent to turn the turbines of the hydroelectric generators deep underground. Those generators kept electricity flowing throughout the entire facility, and - being the model of maximum technological efficiency - everything was wired up to them.

On his back, he carried a large satchel. He opened it and took out a timing device which was wired up to a dozen spell cards.

He took a deep breath; there was no going back after this. Once this plan was set in motion, there would be nothing to stop it.

He shut his eyes. He saw Gadget’s face.

“Heh,” he chuckled dryly. “I really am hopeless.”

He clicked the button on the timer, and it began ticking.

He immediately dropped the bundle of cards back into the satchel and cinched it up before dropping it into the water. The current sucked it under where it would no doubt be caught by the filtering grate over the pipe. He was already galloping back towards the secret entrance to TechQuestria. He would need to work very quickly.

The timer ticked down. When it reached zero, it sent a signal to the spell cards, which all activated at once. They were all of the same kind: ice spells.

In an instant, the rushing water flash froze, creating a spire of ice that completely blocked the entire pipe and jutted outward, breaking the water’s surface as it rose nearly a meter into the air.

Deep in the bowels of TechQuestria, the technicians managing the power plant all stared as, one by one, the generators ground to a halt. The power began to fail, and the lights began to flicker.

Umahara smirked as he made his way down the tunnel. All across TechQuestria, the entire facility was finding itself in complete and utter darkness. He could already hear the screams and panicked shouts echoing from the facility.

He knew the backup power would kick on soon, and so would the lights. But it wouldn’t matter. He knew that the doors all around TechQuestria had power locks and that, in case of an emergency, the engineers had made sure that ponies would still be able to evacuate the facility even if all power failed…

***

Twilight watched as the lights began to blink, then dim, and finally go completely dark. In the blackened room, the only illumination was the light from Turing’s eyes. But then those eyes turned toward the door as it clicked, the power lock disengaging and the door gently swinging open.

“I think,” Twilight said, even as the two panicking guards stood in the doorway, “that’s our cue to leave, Turing.”

“Affirmative, Twilight Sparkle,” Turing replied.

The two guards stared back in horror as the robot advanced on them, ignoring their frantic commands to stop. It was clear that she wouldn’t be stopping for anypony now.

To be continued...

Author's Notes:

Next time: As TechQuestria falls into chaos, the others make their escape... but finding each other in addition to a way out is not without its obstacles...

References? I remember those...

-First off, there's the title reference. This chapter is named after a song by Joonas Hahmo, a legend in the EDM scene especially known for his Trance music. I listen to a lot of Joonas Hahmo when I write, so it seemed fitting that I name a chapter after one of his epic tunes:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RlPunThtM7E

The Tom Fall remix of that track is pretty great too:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bSDS4FFnvkE

-Turing mentions retrieving her memory module from storage unit A113, a reference to a running gag/easter egg in Pixar films, though most notably in their robot-centric movie WALL-E.

-Pinkie's dialogue when she was pretending to be the "whispery voiced pony" on the telephone are a parody of the dialogue in the movie JFK.

-In keeping with that, her pseudonym "Pink Throat" is a reference to the pseudonym "Deep Throat" used by the infamous Watergate informant Mark Felt, whose information led to U.S. President Richard Nixon's resignation. His story can be found here.

-The mental exchange between Pinkie and Turing Test which culminates in "This! Is! Humor!" is a reference to the memetastic phenomenon "This! Is! Sparta!" spawned by the film 300.

-This is a joke that I didn't use: the scene with Turing Test being congratulated by her friends for remembering herself nearly turned into a reference to the infamous last scene of the anime Neon Genesis Evangelion. Just needed Turing sitting on a big blue ball.

-Turing saying "I am a toaster with legs" is a pretty obvious reference to Turing Toast, Turing's accidental transformation in the earlier joke chapter, in case you forgot about it.

That's about it for now, but as one last bonus, one of the editing team, GenerousGypsy, did something super nice and made a cute little musical piece for Turing Test called "Remember Robot." It has a nice "music box" quality, and since the title matches the theme of this story, I thought I'd link it for you all. I hope you all like it! I know I sure do!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I3vtthDgZEI

See you next time!

Chase, Part 1

View Online

002 made her way up the tunnel, her metallic hooves echoing in the empty air. She’d just come from being asked to help load supplies onto the supply train after one of the other workers had put his back out.

Just another menial task that fell to her because some pathetic organic was insufficient for the job they were tasked with. So she’d said her ‘Yes, Masters’ and lugged the crates back and forth while the others talked and joked and acted as though she wasn’t even there. One of them had even stopped directly in her path to check a list on a clipboard. A list on a clipboard! Was it so hard for organics to remember a simple list?!

Still, it didn’t weigh too heavily on her. She had other things on her mind…

I wonder if 003 was successful in retrieving her memory module, she thought to herself. What will she do then? What will the organics do? I hope it will be interesting…

Just then, the lights overhead began to flicker. One by one in sequence down the tunnel, the lights shut off in rapid succession. She found herself standing alone in darkness, her singular yellow eye shining out in pitch blackness.

The electricity has failed?

She considered what could be the cause. But then she realized what it would mean. With the power out, all door locks would open, and that would allow all the prisoners to escape.

“Ohhhh,” she said, her hushed voice a distorted moan. “This is going to be a very fun evening.”

***

Twilight watched as Turing used her magic to tie the cords that had formerly bound her wings around the hooves of the two guards. They’d gagged them by tying some washcloths from Twilight’s “suite” around their mouths and tossed them both in the bedroom.

“Okay, that should take care of them, Turing,” Twilight said as she walked out of the room with Turing. “Now, we--”

Just then, the overhead lights flickered on.

“The power is back!” Twilight cried. “Turing, does this mean the locks are back on? Did Umahara fail?”

Turing shook her head. “I do not believe so, Twilight Sparkle,” she replied. “In the event of a power failure, all technicians in the electrical plant would have immediately engaged auxiliary power. They have batteries as well as numerous steam generators to keep the facility operating even under these circumstances. However, all power locks like those found on your door will still be disengaged.”

“Well, that’s a relief,” Twilight said. “That means our friends can escape and we can still get through TechQuestria without having any locked doors to worry about, right?”

“Affirmative, though some doors may be locked manually,” Turing said. “However, the greater difficulty will be avoiding security. Our escape will almost certainly be discovered soon, and more guards will attempt to impede our progress and apprehend our friends. Our greatest advantage is that, due to the size of the entire complex, adequately guarding all of it will be impossible, and they do not know where we are going.”

She paused.

“Twilight Sparkle, where are we going?”

Twilight smiled. “Umahara said we should go to the amphitheater,” she said. “I think he probably told our friends the same thing, so we should probably go there.”

Turing nodded. “I will calculate the most expedient route to that location, Twilight Sparkle. Please follow me.”

Turing led and Twilight followed close behind as they galloped up the hallway.

When they paused so Turing could glance around a corner to see if it was safe, Twilight raised her hoof and pointed to the metallic ring around the base of her horn.

“I could probably be of more help if I could use magic, by the way,” Twilight said. “While we’re going to the amphitheater, do you think we could get this magic suppression device off me?”

Turing tapped her chin. “According to my information, the only way to safely deactivate it is by remote control from a high-ranking security official or by obtaining a specialized hex key,” she said. “I do not recommend the former, due to the need for confronting security officials, but the latter may also prove difficult. We will need to locate a security outpost or emergency supplies cache, and I have not been given information on which of those are currently supplied with magically encoded hex keys.”

Twilight frowned. “Well that’s just great,” she grumbled.

Turing’s ears twitched. “I have a suggestion, Twilight Sparkle,” she said. “If we modify our route, there are some caches in various locations along the way that may have the keys we require. It may also make our movements more difficult to track than if we took a direct route, though there is also a higher risk of encountering personnel. However, your magic skills are formidable and may be a valuable asset, which may offset the risk posed by--”

“Turing, Turing, enough,” Twilight whispered, looking over her shoulder. “Look, let’s do that. We’ll be careful, but if we’re going to get out of here, we’ll need to hit TechQuestria with everything we’ve got!”

“Understood,” Turing said, beckoning for Twilight to follow her as she again made her way up the hallway. “I will do my best to protect you in the meantime. However,” she added, her ears drooping slightly, “our other friends lack my abilities as a robot and your skill with magic. I hope they will be successful in finding their way to the amphitheater.”

Twilight swallowed. “Me too, Turing,” she said quietly. “We’ll just have to hope we can meet up with each other along the way, or that they can manage on their own.”

***

When the lights went out and the door swung open, Rainbow Dash was already prepared, having been crouched in readiness for nearly twenty minutes in anticipation. She launched herself forward in total darkness at her foes.

“She’s loo--!” one of the guards tried to say before a hoof smacked him upside the head.

“Ha!” Rainbow Dash laughed, lashing out blindly, striking with her front hooves and back alike. “Take this! And that! And one of these!”

She heard the guards grunt and struggle and try to fight back, but every kick she landed let her know just where her foes were, and her wings helped her dodge and weave in the narrow corridor. After landing several blows, she heard one of them fall to the ground groaning, followed by the other.

“Yes! That’s right! That’s what you get when you mess with me and my friends! Rainbow Dash 1, Dumb Guards 0! You’ve got nothing on--”

“Um, Rainbow Da--”

“Hi-yaaa!” Rainbow shouted, reflexively backhanding in the direction of the sudden voice.

“Ow!” squealed a high-pitched and suddenly very familiar voice. “Rainbow Dash, stop!”

Rainbow froze. “F-Fluttershy?”

The lights suddenly flickered back on. The two security guards were on the floor unconscious, but Rainbow was face to face with Fluttershy, who was rubbing the end of her muzzle tenderly.

“Th-that really hurt,” Fluttershy whimpered.

“Oh my gosh, oh my gosh, I’m so sorry!” Rainbow cried, covering her mouth. “I just reacted, it was an accident! Are you okay?”

“I’m fine,” Fluttershy said, trying to smile. “I know you didn’t mean to.”

“Let me see that,” Rainbow said, gently moving Fluttershy’s hooves to the side.

“How does it look?” Fluttershy asked.

Rainbow froze, but then put on a noticeably forced grin. “It’s, uh,” she began, “it’s not too bad!”

Fluttershy gulped. “Is it broken?”

“No, it, uh…” She trailed off and muttered into her foreleg.

“What?”

“You’re just… y’know… bleeding a little…”

Fluttershy leaned in. “I’m what?” Then she glanced down at her own hoof and saw the spec of blood there.

“Oh.” She began to wobble on her hooves.

Rainbow Dash gulped. “Now, Fluttershy, try to stay ca--”

Fluttershy groaned and promptly fainted on the spot.

“Oh for pony’s sake!” Rainbow groaned. She flew back into their room, retrieved a glass of water, then promptly splashed it into Fluttershy’s face.

The yellow pegasus bolted back up into the air, sputtering. “Huh? What, what happened?!”

“Look, Fluttershy, get a grip!” she shouted. “We have to get moving! You don’t have time to bleed!”

“B-b-b--”

Rainbow shoved two wads of tissue into Fluttershy’s nostrils. “There! Now you’re not… leaking anymore!” she said, taking her by the shoulders. “Stay with it, Fluttershy! We’ve got to get to the amphitheater! We’ll need to find our other friends if we want to get out of here and save everypony! Think of the others! Think of your animals at home! Think of Turing Test!”

Fluttershy paused, then smiled. “Ogay, Raimbow Daj,” she said, her nose still stuffed with with tissue. “Vor During Dest.”

Rainbow Dash suppressed a snicker. “All right, then let’s fly!” she said, and soared off down the hallway.

“B-but Raimbow!” Fluttershy cried. “Where id de ambvitheater?”

“Hay if I know! But if we keep going, we’ll find it eventually!”

***

When the lights went out at Pinkie Pie and Rarity’s room, the two guards on duty both immediately turned to face the suddenly open door.

“Stay where you are, you two!” said the first guard.

“If you make the slightest move, we--”

A high-pitched shriek pierced the darkness.

“Ahhh!” Rarity screamed. “The lights! What happened?!”

“It’s just a power outage,” one of the guards grunted. “Just calm down--”

“You mean we’re stranded deep underground with no lights? Oh no…”

“It’s not a big deal,” the other guard said. “Just stay calm and--”

“You don’t understand!” Rarity cried. “I’m terrified of the dark!”

“I… uh…”

“Where are you? Oh, please, come and hold me!”

“Come and… hold you?” the first guard asked, glad that she couldn’t see him blushing in the darkness.

“Yes… oh, I’m dreadfully sorry to trouble you, but it would help me feel so much better until the lights come back on.”

The first guard hesitated. “Uh, what do you think?” he asked the second.

“Oh just hold her already,” he grumbled. “They’ll have auxiliary power on any minute, so just keep her from whining.”

“Oh, yes,” Rarity agreed, “please do. I do hate to whiiiiiine…”

“All right, all right!” the guard said, walking toward the sound of her voice. “Just stay calm. Now where… ah, there you--”

There was a wet splat sound followed by the sound of the guard stumbling around in the darkness.

“What’s going on? What is this?!” shouted the second guard.

Then he heard Pinkie’s voice right next to his ear: “It’s a surprise.”

The lights came on just in time for him to see the cream pie before it hit him in the face.

As he likewise staggered around, disoriented as whipped cream filled his vision, Rarity and Pinkie Pie dashed out the door.

“I still can’t believe that worked!” Rarity laughed as she ran through the hallway. “I suppose I owe you an apology for saying it was a waste of time to bake cream pies before an escape attempt, Pinkie.”

“It just goes to show you, Rarity,” Pinkie said, turning to grin at her as she pulled a previously unforeseen pair of sunglasses out of her mane. “When you mess with Pinkie…”

Rarity’s eyes bulged. “Oh no, Pinkie, please don’t say it--”

“...you’re gonna get Pie’d!” she finished, putting the sunglasses on.

***YEEEEAAAAAAHHHH!!***

“And that should just about do it!” Dr. Hawkeye said, calling over the security guards as he undid the straps that held Applejack to the operating table. “How are you feeling, Applejack?”

“Still stings a bit,” she replied as the guards took her forelegs and helped her off the table. “Tingles too, but--whoa!”

As she tried to stand, she suddenly lurched forward.

“Well, there will be some bruising in your flank,” Dr. Hawkeye said, “but nothing too serious. In the meantime, it looks like you’ve noticed one of the side effects of the treatment.”

“Side effects?” Applejack asked, stumbling slightly as each step from her hind legs felt like she had springs attached to her hooves. “My hind legs feel jumpier than a paranoid bullfrog!”

“Heh,” Dr. Hawkeye chuckled, taking out his notepad. “I’m going to have to write that one down…”

“Doc!” Applejack exclaimed.

“It’s nothing to worry about,” he said. “Every so often, though, the formula causes a patient to have a temporary increase in the strength and tenseness of their joints, giving them a little… well, a lot more kicking power in their legs. It’ll wear off soon enough, though.”

Applejack blinked. “Ya don’t say,” she muttered, glancing at the guards to her left and right.

Nurse Valentine noticed this and narrowed her eyes. “Before you start thinking--”

Just then, the overhead lights went out. Curiously, though, all the other machinery stayed on, and emergency lights near the doors blinked on.

“What was that?” one of the guards demanded.

“A power outage!” another shouted.

“Well, it’s a good thing we’ve got backup batteries for the Medical Ward,” Hawkeye said calmly. “Not that we have anypony on life support right now, but still, good to know.”

“But wait a minute,” said one of the guards, “if the main power’s out, wouldn’t that disengage the power locks on all the doors in TechQuestria? What if the prisoners try to escape?!”

Applejack’s eyes widened, and she raised a back hoof slightly.

Valentine was about to call out a warning, but she was too late.

Applejack levelled a kick at the nearest guard. It hit him directly in the chest and sent him flying across the room.

“Hoowee!” Applejack exclaimed, propelling herself from her captors’ grasps. “Now I could get used to this!”

Valentine cried out, “Idiots! Why’d you have to open your big mouth! Stop her!”

The guards tried to reach for her, but with the newfound strength in her back legs, Applejack easily outmaneuvered them, bucking each one like they were little more than hay bales, sending them all flying.

Applejack ran at the exit, practically tripping over herself with how fast she was able to move. As she ran, she called out, “Thanks fer the new legs, doc! I’ll make good use of ‘em!”

“Applejack!” Hawkeye cried, the tone of his voice enough to actually make Applejack come to a halt.

“D-doc?” she asked, turning to look at him.

“I just wanted to say,” he sighed, before giving her a smile, “I’m sorry for how things turned out… but I’m glad we were able to help you. I hope you’ll be bucking apples for a long time to come.”

Applejack tipped her hat. “You know I will, doc,” she said, and dashed through the doors.

“You’re a lot more weak-willed than I thought,” Valentine sighed, gathering up several of the nearby surgical tools on a tray and placing them into her nurse’s uniform.

“Leave her to the security guards,” Hawkeye said, turning to walk away. “It’s out of our hooves.”

“Oh no, I couldn’t do that,” Valentine said, using her magic to brandish a scalpel. “After all, I never lose a patient.”

She ran after Applejack.

***

Cobbler stood on the catwalk, leaning over the guardrail as he watched dozens of workers, his fellow patriots, haul massive tanks of thaumatrium - their liquid contents glowing as they gently sloshed inside the clear containers - up the ramp and into the great machine that occupied almost the entirely of the cavernous space.

In spite of the long night he’d had and forcing himself to relive the pain he’d gone through, his heart was still pounding with excitement. After a decade of planning, building, innovation, and leading his nation, Professor Cobbler Mustang was there to see his dreams coming true. In a scant few hours, the sun would rise one last time over the Kingdom of Equestria, but by that night it would set over the Republic of Equestria.

He could hardly keep the grin from his face. New Dawn was fast approaching, and soon Celestia and all of Canterlot would stare in awe at the majestic fruit of TechQuestria’s labor, the incredible machine their backwards thinking could never produce. They would know they were powerless the instant they beheld--

Then the lights all went off.

Shouts erupted from all around him as a few hundred ponies suddenly found themselves in the dark.

Cobbler grabbed the bullhorn he’d kept nearby. “Quiet, everypony, quiet!” he shouted, getting their attention. “There is no need to panic! I’m certain the power will be restored soon. If you have flashlights or other artificial light sources, utilize them until the lights return!”

He heard murmuring in the cavernous space all around him as they all calmed themselves and tried to return to work. He smiled to himself, hearing many of them saying “Yes, Mr. President,” aloud.

He would truly miss being the president of this nation, but once his work was done, it would be time to let the younger ponies around him take over. Perhaps one of the council members…

He shook his head. He had other matters to attend to.

He made his way up the catwalk, intending to reach the nearest telephone station - there was at least one mounted on the wall in each department - knowing that it ran on its own power system. However, no sooner had he reached it than the power returned and the lights switched back on.

Ponies all around cheered as they threw themselves back into their work. Cobbler gave a calm, reassuring smile to the ponies nearby, but he had a dreadful feeling that was growing by the moment. He picked up the phone and clicked the receiver.

“Operator? This is the president speaking.”

“Hello, Mr. President,” said the operator. “How may I direct your call?”

“Connect me with the power station immediately. Override any other incoming calls; this is an emergency!”

“Understood, sir.”

He waited as he heard the phone ringing on the other end. A moment later, somepony picked up.

“Hello?”

“This is President Cobbler speaking. Is the forepony present?”

“Ah, sir! Yes, I’m the forepony. I apologize for the power outage. For some reason, the entire flow of water into the hydroelectric generators has been cut off!”

He froze. “You mean to tell me,” he said, “that we are currently running on auxiliary power?”

“Well, yes, sir. We were able to activate the backup--”

“How long do we have until that fails as well?”

“We have at least six hours, sir. But we can shut down nonessential areas of TechQuestria if we need to extend that.”

Cobbler breathed a sigh of relief. That would be enough time to complete preparations.

“Proceed with repairs. Do you have any idea what might have caused this?”

“We sent a maintenance crew, sir. Perhaps there was a landslide or a large amount of debris in the river.”

Cobbler wrinkled his nose at that, but merely replied, “Perhaps.” He sighed. “In the meantime, are there any other issues I need to be aware of?”

“No sir. Though we should make a general announcement so everypony will stop asking repair crews why their electronic locks aren’t working.”

Cobbler froze as it hit him: the locks, the emergency procedures, the doors, Twilight Sparkle and her friends!

“Call me as soon as you know the cause!” he shouted, and promptly hung up. He then immediately picked up the phone again and asked to be connected with Central Command.

“Mr. President? This is Commander Lugnut speaking. How can I be of--”

“Lugnut, the emergency protocols! The electronic door locks have all been disabled!” Cobbler shouted.

There was silence on the other end.

“Oh,” Lugnut breathed. “That’s right.”

“Contact the ponies guarding the Elements immediately!”

“Of course, sir. I’ll… wait, just a moment…”

Cobbler heard somepony speaking to Lugnut excitedly in the background. Judging by his gruff reaction, it wasn’t good news.

“Sir, I’m sorry to report that Applejack has overpowered the guards in the Medical Ward and escaped--”

“Find her!” he bellowed, loud enough for ponies nearby to stop and take notice.

“We are, sir,” Lugnut said. “We’re attempting to make contact with the other guards right now. We… just a moment, sir…”

There was more excited murmuring. Then more yelling. Cobbler grit his teeth.

“Uh, s-sir?” Lugnut said, his voice noticeably shakier than before. “We’ve received word back from the Prison Ward that the inventor girl is still secured, but… the ponies guarding Rarity and Pinkie Pie report that they’ve escaped. And we are currently unable to reach the ponies guarding Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy… or the ones guarding Twilight Sparkle.”

Cobbler was ready to scream his head off at Lugnut, but he glanced around and saw all the ponies watching him. He didn’t want to do anything that might distract them from their work. He took a deep, calming breath and tried to put on a calmer face for the onlookers.

“Commander,” he said calmly, “I will thank you very much to find and recapture them immediately. Deploy every available guard to locate them, but above all else - and listen very closely, Commander,” he added in a low growl, “they are not to gather in one place. Even if it’s only one that you manage to stop, that will be adequate, but we will be in quite the predicament if they unite due to that little trick of theirs. Now, have I made myself perfectly clear?”

“Yes, sir. I’ve already given the order.”

“Excellent. Use whatever means necessary.”

He thought he heard a snicker. “With pleasure, sir.”

Cobbler hung up. No sooner had he done so when the phone rang again, causing him to give a start at the sudden sound.

“Hello?” he said, picking up the earpiece.

“Sir, this is the forepony! The maintenance crew discovered ice in the main pipeline! It was done with spell cards! Sir, it’s sabotage!”

Cobbler was silent for a moment. “Spell cards?” he whispered.

“Well… yes, sir. We detected trace amounts of thaumatrium--”

“Clear the pipes,” Cobbler said. “Make that your top priority.”

He hung up again. Then he turned, making his way for the steps. They’d received their final shipment of spell cards from the Magitech Department only a short while ago.

He had a sinking feeling, a seed of nagging doubt that was beginning to take hold and grow. But if there were spell cards missing from that shipment, he had a good idea of who’d sabotaged the pipes.

He’d wait and see before notifying security. He’d make absolutely certain. And if his suspicions were confirmed, well…

...then Umahara, at least for his own sake, had better be far away from TechQuestria already.

***

The two guards outside the Prison Ward’s main door stood at attention.

Well, one stood at attention while the other read a magazine.

“Five more minutes,” said the guard at attention, “then I get to read.”

“Yeah, I know,” said the second guard, using his magic to flip the page. “Whoa, check out the tail on this gal!”

“Pfft, those are tail extensions if I’ve ever seen ‘em,” said the first.

“Don’t care. She still looks hot.”

Then both their ears rose. The elevator was humming. Someone was coming down.

The second guard stuffed the magazine back in his uniform, and they both stood ready, each grabbing their batons to confront whoever might be coming to greet them.

The elevator doors opened, and the pony inside stepped out.

“Hey, guys!” Umahara said, smiling at the two of them.

“Oh, great, it’s the loverboy,” grumbled the first guard, rolling his eyes. The second guard snickered.

Umahara let a flicker of annoyance briefly cross his face. “Listen you two,” he said, “I’m here to--”

“Oh no,” said the first guard. “Commander Lugnut said you were cut off. We’re not letting you in to see the prisoner.”

“Can’t say I blame you, though,” the second one said, glancing over his shoulder. “I don’t care much about the glasses or the messy mane, but she’s got some nice flanks. And she’s got some fight in her… I keep hearing the little sounds she makes trying to get free even though she knows it’s pointless. I’d like to hear what other sounds she might make.” He grinned, locking eyes with Umahara.

Umahara’s smile became more forced. “I didn’t come for her,” he said, walking forward.

“Hey hey, that’s close enough,” said the first guard, brandishing his baton.

“Relax, I just wanted to show you guys this,” Umahara said, using his magic to hold up a remote control.

Using it, he drove a small drone on wheels up the pathway. It was decorated brightly with the TechQuestrian emblem and streamers on all sides. He pressed a button, and two thin arms rose up and separated, revealing a banner which read ‘Victory! To the New Republic!’

“Hey, that’s kinda neat,” said the second guard.

“Yeah, but why show it to us?” asked the first, raising an eyebrow.

“I’m off duty, and I figured you two have to be the most bored ponies in TechQuestria,” he said, shrugging his shoulders, “and since I can’t sleep anyway, I thought I’d at least show it to you and see what you think. It’s not like you had anything better to do. If you like it, I’ll build a bunch more for the party we’ll have once Celestia surrenders!”

“That’s--”

“Aw, let him show us,” said the second guard. “He’s right anyway; I’m bored, so even this ought to be interesting. Does it do anything else?”

“Sure does!” Umahara said, pressing another button.

A panel on top of the drone slid open, and a balloon appeared. It slowly began to inflate, growing larger and larger until it was the size of a pony, and yet it still grew.

“Jeez, how big does this thing get?” asked the second guard.

“Well, it should be finished juuust aboouut…”

The balloon burst with a loud bang that caused both guards to jump, distracted for a split second as they saw the spell card that had been hidden inside the balloon seemingly floating in midair.

They both gasped as it activated, giving off a flash of light. They both wobbled on their hooves before slowly slumping to the floor, fast asleep.

“Hope I won’t need any more sleep spells,” Umahara whispered to himself, walking over to one of the sleeping guards to take his keys.

The guard only snored in response.

He unlocked the main door and galloped down the hall.

“If you jerks are here to tell me to give up the Point Dexter,” he heard Gadget shout, “then you can forget it! I already told you--”

He ran to her cell, placing his hooves against the bars.

“Gadget!” he shouted. “It’s me!”

She stared back at him for a moment before turning from him, her nose in the air. “I thought visiting hours were over,” she said snidely. “What, did they send you here to convince me one last time to give up my invention?”

“No,” he said. “I’m here to rescue you.”

She refused to look at him. “Yeah, sure you are,” she said, rolling her eyes.

Then she heard the door to her cell open as he unlocked it and stepped in.

“H-hey, you better stay where you are!” she shouted as he came closer. She began to struggle. “You try anything funny, and I’ll make you regret it! Just because you’ve got me locked up like this doesn’t mean I can’t defend myself! I’ll bite your ears off! I’ll--”

“Gadget!” he shouted, causing her to look at him directly.

She saw the keys he held in his magic. He had a warm smile on his face.

“You… you mean it?” she asked. “You’re actually saving me?”

“Yes,” he replied. Then he frowned. “Um… what exactly did you think I was going to do?”

She bit her lip and looked away. “Oh, well, heh heh… I read this Neighponese comic one time where--”

“Never mind, forget I asked!” Umahara snapped, sifting through the keys to find the right one to Gadget’s restraints. “Jeez, of all the things from my ancestral culture for you to latch onto, it had to be that junk!”

“Th-that’s not what I usually read!” she snapped, her cheeks turning bright red. “Usually I read nice stories! Clean stories! Stuff where the nice guy gets the beautiful prince!”

Umahara froze.

“Er, I meant ‘princess!’ Look, just get me out of these stupid restraints already!”

He managed to keep the smirk from his face as he first undid the clamps around her hooves, then, one by one, unlocked the restraints in each corner of the cell that held her mechanical hands.

Finally freed, she collapsed after being forced to stand in the same position for hours.

“Gadget!” Umahara cried, rushing over to her. “Are you okay?”

He put his hoof to her cheek, and she raised her head, meeting his eyes.

“You… you really did come to save me…”

“I also gave the others a chance to escape,” he said, smiling down at her. “And Turing Test should be back to normal too. If we go, we can find them and get out of here.”

She stared back at him. “You really turned your back on TechQuestria?” she breathed. “Why?”

He rubbed the back of his neck. “I guess what you said finally got to me. And, well,” he said, glancing away, “I decided some things were more important to me than political revolution.”

Gadget swallowed and unsteadily got to her hooves. He knelt and helped steady her, and when she finally found her footing, her cheeks colored.

“Umahara,” she whispered, moving closer to him. Her lips parted.

His heart skipped a beat. Time itself seemed to slow down. “Gadget,” he whispered back and leaned in closer, his eyes closing.

Then a mechanical hand seized him around the muzzle. Another one shot forward, punching him right in the nose.

“Ow!” he shouted, falling backwards, rubbing his aching muzzle. “What the hay was that for?!”

Gadget smirked, crossing one foreleg in front of the other; all the apparent weakness she showed a moment ago was totally gone.

“Before we left for Mustangia, I promised Mr. Vanderbull I’d sock you right in the muzzle, and I’m a mare of my word!” she said.

He grumbled as she lent him a mechanical hand to help him up.

“Aww, what, did you think I was actually going to kiss you?” she said teasingly, holding a hoof up to her mouth as she giggled demurely. Then she stuck her tongue out at him. “Not likely, you jerk!”

Umahara’s ears drooped as he lowered his head. “I see,” he muttered. “I can’t blame you.”

Seeing this, she softened. “I, um…” she began before trailing off. Then she cleared her throat. “It’s not that I’m not grateful. I really am. But you still betrayed my trust. And you really hurt me. I’m not going to forget that like it never happened.”

He sighed, but raised his head, managing a smile. “No, I really didn’t expect anything,” he said. “I guess I just got my hopes up when you acted like you were going to… I mean… I guess what I’m saying is that I still have some feelings for you, Gadget. Even if I know I screwed it all up forever. But I didn’t help you because I thought it would make you feel the same way about me. I just did it because--”

She suddenly put a mechanical finger to his lips.

“Because you’re a good pony,” she said, giving him a more genuine smile. “And I forgive you.”

He stared back at her, actually feeling a lump in his throat.

“Gadget… I…”

“Look, even if nothing else happens with, y’know… us,” she said, blushing slightly again, “I think what you’re doing is very brave. I’ll be glad to call you a friend, and I’ll stick up for you when this is all over.”

Umahara smirked. “I can accept friendship,” he replied.

“Good,” she said. Then she jerked a mechanical thumb at the door. “Now let’s get out of here.”

They both ran out the door, heading for the elevator.

“We need to get to the amphitheater,” Umahara said as the door shut. “I told Twilight and the others to go there. It’s a long run, but it’s one central location that should be easy to find for everypony. I just hope we can all avoid the guards.”

“Don’t worry, Umahara. If any of them try to mess with us,” Gadget said, smirking as she flexed her mechanical arms like a bodybuilder, “I’ll keep you safe and sound!”

He gave her a sideways glance. “Oh, well, I feel much safer now,” he said sarcastically, “though if I really get stuck, I guess I could always use these.”

Using his magic, he drew a dozen more spell cards from his black shirt, fanning them out like an expert poker player.

Her eyes widened. “Wow,” she breathed. Then, with a grin, she added, “We might just pull this off!”

The elevator began to rise.

***

002 was in the charging room, topping off the last bit of her battery. She was alone, silent, and still, but she knew that the call would come.

Cognitive loop detected, her systems told her.

I wonder if this is what organics call ‘anticipation.’ Or perhaps ‘excitement.’ There is that expression they use: ‘the calm before the storm.’ Whatever it is, though, I like it.

The overhead speakers blared to life:

“Attention TechQuestria: this is Commander Lugnut of the Security Forces. I am declaring a state of emergency. This is not a drill.

“Twilight Sparkle and the other captives have escaped. We are still determining how, but it appears to be sabotage. All security forces not devoted to Operation New Dawn are now looking for the fugitives. All citizens are urged to stay in their quarters in the Residential District. All deputized personnel not currently committed to New Dawn are to arm themselves and assist in apprehending the fugitives.

“We have also learned that Twilight Sparkle has somehow regained control over automaton Unit 003. Be advised that it is formidable and should be considered extremely dangerous. Unit 004 has been deployed as a countermeasure.”

002 raised her head at that. So, 003 has regained her memory. I wonder if she will be able to withstand 004, should he locate her. Will her allies be able to assist her? Her mind buzzed with such questions, even as she began calculating possibilities.

“Above all,” Lugnut continued, “the fugitives are not to be allowed to rejoin with each other. Even if you are only able to detain one of them, that will be sufficient. Exercise caution, but do all that you can for our nation on our greatest day. That is all.”

002 tilted her head, and at first she was incredulous that there was no mention of her in the announcement. Then the radio receiver in her ear blared to life. She raised her right ear, attempting to improve the reception.

“002, are you there?” Lugnut asked, his voice reverberating inside her head.

002 got to her hooves. “Of course, Master Lugnut,” she replied. “Where else would I be?”

“President Cobbler has authorized special security measures,” he continued, ignoring the question entirely. “I order you to deploy all available security drones to locate the fugitives. Do you understand?”

She paused for a moment; over the years she’d found that such pauses had the dual effect of both making her masters think that she was considering their requests more carefully and also irritating them, especially if she waited longer than three seconds to respond.

After 3.2 seconds (and delighting at the sound of Lugnut exhaling sharply through his nose), she replied, “I am not certain, Master Lugnut. You stated that all available security drones were to be deployed to ‘locate the fugitives’; however, your previous announcement called not only for location, but detainment. While some drones are only capable of surveillance and detection, do you not wish for attack drones to be used to their full capabilities?”

“Deploy those as well!” Lugnut snapped. “I’ll make this perfectly clear, 002: you are to do everything you can to stop them! Use every capability, every drone, everything you have available!”

002 hesitated for another second before replying. “Understood, Master Lugnut,” she said. “I will do as my Creator orders.”

“Good,” Lugnut said brusquely. “Commander Lugnut out.”

As the signal died away, 002 disconnected herself from her charging alcove and strode out into the nearby tunnel. She couldn’t help herself and giggled at the great opportunity she’d just been given.

‘Do everything you can to stop them,’ Commander Lugnut? she thought to herself, raising her ears as her eye began to glow. That’s one order I can truly say that I won’t mind following!

All around the underground nation of TechQuestria, security drones in outposts and storage units came to life, their motors engaging as 002’s signal reached out to them. They began to move, rolling and flying through the tunnels and vents as they spread out. She boosted her signal and began to access every available device.

She felt herself expand, growing beyond even the superior metal body she’d been given as though, in a way, she were becoming the facility itself, and all the squirming little organics running through the tunnels were just the scurrying microbes tumbling blindly through her veins.

“Finally,” she murmured aloud, “a worthwhile task. Now, 003, where are you and your squishy little friends hiding?”

To be continued…

Author's Notes:

Let the chase begin...

References!

-The title refers to the famous track from Midnight Express by electronic music pioneer Giorgio Moroder. Despite its age, I think it still holds up pretty well. Even today, EDM artists and DJs are known to remix it and Daft Punk even penned an ode to Moroder on their album Random Access Memories.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ViN2bRGrBx8

-Pinkie's bit with the sunglasses is a reference to the American crime TV series CSI: Miami. The show's cold opening often features Detective Horatio Caine (played by David Caruso) making a snappy remark as he puts on his sunglasses, which segues right into the theme song, The Who's "We Won't Get Fooled Again," which begins with singer Pete Townshend yelling "YEEEAAAAAHH!" This became a minor meme for a while, though it might be obscure enough or dank enough to need explanation. More explanation here.

-Rainbow Dash's line "You don't have time to bleed!" is a reference to the movie Predator. The line "I ain't got time to bleed," is spoken by Jesse "The Body" Ventura. (Special thanks to darkace55 who got the reference and who pointed out, since I originally forgot to include it in these notes. )

Next time, as New Dawn rapidly approaches, everypony scrambles to escape TechQuestria. But with an army of security guards, a crazed nurse, and a pair of very dangerous robots, it won't be easy.

And just what is it that lurks in the deepest parts of TechQuestria, away from prying eyes?

Chase, Part 2

View Online

002 trotted up a narrow spiral staircase, mostly to be in a more ideal place to send and receive signals from her newly acquired army of drones. She was particularly eager to receive data from the surveillance drones, as they were equipped to emit high-pitched sounds and then pick up the data from the echoes. “Sonar,” the scientists were calling it.

Whatever the name, she couldn’t wait to try it out.

She reached the top of the staircase and twitched her ears, turning her head as she did so, receiving data from her drones as she painted herself a picture of TechQuestria in ones and zeroes in her mind.

“You can run, but you cannot hide, little meat things,” she whispered. “Come out, come out, wherever you are…”

***

Applejack galloped down the tunnel, the bare rock walls echoing with the sound of her hooves rapidly hitting the metal walkway. Unlike the fancier parts of TechQuestria, this area was apparently unconcerned with being ornate. The rounded tunnel was regularly braced up with circular metallic rafters to stabilize it, and bare light bulbs hung from wires strung overhead.

She still felt an exhilarating rush come over her, though she wasn’t sure if it was the adrenaline she felt from escaping or the novelty of her boosted hind legs speeding her down the tunnel that was the cause.

Still, she had to pause for a moment as she came to a split in the path ahead. She skidded to a halt as she was confronted with three different tunnels instead of one.

“Whew!” she said, raising her hat to wipe the sweat from her brow. “I have no idea how these crazy ponies find their way ‘round this place!”

Then she raised her head. There was a strange sound, like the buzzing of an insect, coming from one of the tunnels, She peered around and spotted a small machine using a propeller atop itself to fly. On its bottom was a wide, flat disc. It moved slowly and made a soft, high-pitched beeping sound at regular intervals.

Applejack lowered her head, her ears laid back, and she eyed the little machine suspiciously.

It don’t exactly look dangerous, she thought, but looks can be deceivin’.

***

002 paused as she received a signal.

Surveillance Drone #27 has located Applejack, she determined. She is located in the lower tunnels nearby the Medical Wing at junction #238. And… she is about to have company.

She considered her options. She could report the mare’s position to security, but perhaps she could direct this in a more entertaining direction…

Accessing emergency floodgate controls…

***

Applejack was so focused on the little drone that she almost didn’t hear the sound of somepony approaching behind her. She turned just in time to see something metallic and gleaming sail right past her face.

She looked and saw what had embedded itself into the wall: a scalpel.

She looked back again, a look of horror on her face as she confronted her pursuer.

“Darn, I missed,” Funny Valentine said, using her magic to draw more scalpels out of her uniform. “I guess I need more time on the practice range.”

“What in tarnation are ya doin’?!” Applejack yelled. “Ya coulda killed me with that scalpel!”

“Could’ve, but didn’t,” Valentine sighed. Then she grinned, fanning the scalpels out like a group of playing cards. “These, on the other hand, might do the trick.”

Applejack began to back away. “Whatever happened to that old sayin’... you know, ‘Do no harm?’”

Valentine shrugged. “I never wanted to be a nurse anyway,” she replied. “I was training for the Security Forces, but they said they needed more nurses, so I guess I had to fall back on my old medical training. But why talk about me, when we can kill you instead!”

She tossed the scalpels at Applejack, who barely managed to jump out of the way, using her newly-strengthened hind legs to leap almost to the ceiling. In another moment, Valentine was on her, striking at her with her hooves.

“Get away from me, ya crazy nurse!” Applejack shouted, trying to dodge blow after blow. Then one of Valentine’s strikes caught her across the face, causing her to reel backwards.

“Oh come on, Applejack,” Valentine laughed, her voice taking on a strange giddiness. “It’s time for your physical! And if you keep struggling, you won’t get a lollipop!”

Applejack whipped around and aimed a back hoof at Valentine. She kicked her right in the jaw, sending her flying back.

“Lollipop, eh?” Applejack said, spitting out the trace amount of blood in her mouth. “Well suck on that.”

Valentine shook her head, but flashed a sharklike grin at Applejack as she steadied herself, staring down her prey.

“Mm, this is going to be fun!” she laughed.

Just then, they were both distracted as a loud sound echoed from the left and right tunnels ahead. Applejack turned and saw huge metal doors rising up from the floor, cutting off the tunnels.

“The emergency floodgates?” Valentine wondered aloud. “Why would they activate those?”

Applejack looked over her shoulder at the one open path remaining: the center tunnel.

Guess my decision’s been made for me! she said to herself, and sprinted down the tunnel and around the bend.

Valentine growled as she gave pursuit. Applejack was fast, but a well-placed scalpel or one of Valentine’s hypodermic needles would stop her. And even if such a shot didn’t present itself, Applejack would have to stop sooner or later… and when she did, Valentine would be right there to finish the job.

***

Pinkie and Rarity continued following signs for the amphitheater, but the winding tunnels were so confusing that they’d finally had to stop and get their bearings. They were stopped in front of a sign that had the TechQuestrian logo on it along with their slogan, “Progress! Innovation! Freedom!”

“Pinkie, I could swear that I’ve seen this sign at least two times before!” Rarity cried, still panting after all the running she’d done. “We must have read that map back at the tram station incorrectly!”

“I don’t know…” Pinkie said, eyeing the sign again. “They have a lot of these signs on their walls, so maybe this isn’t the same sign.” She narrowed her eyes, rubbing her chin. “I’m pretty sure we’ve been going toward the amphitheater the whole time.”

Rarity shook her head. “No, I’m sure of it,” she said, tapping the side of the sign. “You see this small scratch on the paint here? I recognize it. Pinkie, we are hopelessly, utterly lost!”

“Mayyybe,” Pinkie said. Then her eyes went wide, and she gasped. “Or maybe we’re both right!”

Rarity blinked. “Pinkie, how in Equestria could we possibly--”

“Maybe this tunnel has a trick to it!” Pinkie continued obliviously. “Maybe you have to guess at the right turn or else it resets and loops you back around to the beginning! Or maybe there’s a code, like if you rearrange the letters in the slogan it gives you a hint about how to progress! Let’s see… ‘Progress, Innovation, Freedom…’”

“Pinkie…”

“I’ve got it! ‘Aforementioned visor prongs!’ Now if we could just figure out what that means--”

“Pinkie!” Rarity shouted. “As impressive as your anagram skills are, I believe we have a little visitor!”

Pinkie paused in her musings and saw that Rarity was pointing up at another surveillance drone.

“Oh my gosh!” she cried. “It’s a tiny robot! Do you think it’s related to Rinny? We heard that announcement a little while ago that Rinny’s back with Twilight, so maybe they freed all her robot family! And Rinny was standing in front of that big meanie Professor Cobbler with a stick and was all, ‘Let my robots go!’ But he said no, so she summoned a plague of robot bugs and frogs and--”

“Pinkie!” Rarity shouted again. “Can we please focus on the issue at hoof?”

Pinkie grinned sheepishly. “Oops, sorry,” she chuckled. “Well… I mean, the little robot isn’t doing anything, really. Maybe it’s harmless.”

They both stared up at the drone. It was merely hanging in the air, its propeller softly humming as it hovered.

“Perhaps,” Rarity said, eyeing the thing suspiciously as she turned away from it. “Still, perhaps we should be going…”

They made their way up the tunnel, glancing over their shoulders as the drone began to follow.

***

002 let out a harsh electronic chuckle.

These two aren’t even making it challenging! she exclaimed to herself. But they want their ‘robots’ to go free in a plague? What a simply wonderful idea…

***

As Pinkie and Rarity continued on their way, they saw a hatch on a nearby air vent open, a harsh buzzing sound emanating from it.

“What is that sound?” Rarity asked.

“Sounds like bees,” Pinkie replied. “But… bigger?”

Just then, a swarm of smaller drones emerged from the vent. They were shiny metallic spheres split horizontally down the middle with a propeller spinning loudly to keep them aloft. As they hovered in the air just ahead of Pinkie and Rarity, their buzzing did indeed sound like a swarm of bees.

Then they began to move closer.

“Uh oh…” Pinkie said, backing away.

“My thoughts exactly,” Rarity replied.

With an even louder buzzing, one of the drones swooped down, the sharp propeller blades aimed right at them.

“Ah! Rarity, zap it with your magic!” Pinkie cried, ducking behind Rarity.

“What?!” Rarity cried. “Pinkie, I--eek!”

Rarity ducked as the little drone zipped right by her. The blade took off a small piece of her mane as it passed, causing her to scream even louder.

Several more of the drones swooped at them, and the two mares had to nimbly dodge each one to avoid getting sliced to ribbons.

“Less yapping, more zapping, Rarity!” Pinkie shouted.

Rarity glared at her and pointed at the magic suppression device on her horn.

“Oh. Right,” Pinkie gulped.

Just then a drone dove at her and grazed her foreleg.

“Ow!” she yelped. “These little buzzing things are awful! And they’re trying to kill us! Rarity, we’ve got to get away from these… these… buzzkills!”

“Agreed!” Rarity screamed, and the pair took off running.

They rounded a corner… only to run into half a dozen guards in gray uniforms blocking their path.

“There they are!” one of them shouted.

“Oh no!” Rarity cried, turning to run back. “Pinkie, this way!”

“You mean back with the buzzkills?!” Pinkie shouted back.

Rarity hesitated, which gave the guards just enough time to rush at them, ready to tackle them to the ground.

***

Those worthless guards, 002 grumbled to herself. Then she paused. However, Commander Lugnut said I should do whatever I could to stop the fugitives… so if the guards get in the way of the drones, they’re interfering in me executing my orders.

She let out another distorted giggle.

I suppose this is their own fault…

***

“Okay, we got ‘em!” shouted one of the guards as he held a struggling Rarity.

“Unhand me, you ruffian!” Rarity shouted, squirming in his grasp.

“Look, you might as well give up, we--”

A buzzkill dove at him, prompting him to duck. The blades of the drone neatly cut his mane almost down to his scalp as it passed.

“Augh! What the--”

Another zipped right by his muzzle, grazing him across it and forcing him to jerk back. Soon they were overwhelmed as the buzzkills began dive bombing them.

“Thing almost took off my head!”

“My tail!”

“Who the hay is controlling these things?!”

“I’ll radio Central Command!” shouted the leader, putting his hoof to his earpiece. His eyes went wide when he only heard static. “I can’t reach them! Something’s blocking the signal!”

“Excuse me!” Rarity shouted, getting the leader’s attention even as the drones continued their attack. “Are those batons just for show, or will you gentlecolts use them for something other than a terrible accessory?!”

The leader blinked. “R-right! Guards, batons!”

He took out his own baton in his magic, the pegasi and earth ponies among them taking them in their mouths, and began swatting at the pesky drones. He managed to smash one like it was a baseball, and soon the others were likewise destroyed, though not without some cuts (and bruises from using batons in such close quarters).

“All right, guards, we did it,” he said, breathing heavily as he tried to catch his breath. “That was close. I guess we really--”

“Uh, sir, where are the prisoners?” asked another guard.

They looked amongst themselves. Surely enough, Rarity and Pinkie were gone.

“Oh for crying out loud!” he shouted, stomping his hooves. He raised his head and managed to catch a glimpse of Rarity’s (slightly shortened) tail as she disappeared around a corner further up the tunnel.

“That way!” he shouted, taking off in a gallop after them.

The other guards followed suit, but they soon came to a huge door with a sign above it that read “Acoustics Laboratory.”

“Sir, the door’s locked! And I think they’ve barricade it!” said one of the guards.

“Sir, the radio signal’s clear!” said another. “Should I call for reinforcements?”

He nodded. “Do it. We need to get in there and drag those two mares out now!”

***

002 rolled her eye. Ah well. That was fun, but I suppose I’ll let the guards retrieve those two meatbags. Now let’s see… ah, a reported sighting of Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy near Biological Research. It seems Rainbow Dash is a bit too much for the other guards to handle. Who is in the vicinity now?

She checked her signals, then paused when she saw who was nearing their position.

Now that should prove interesting…

***

“Stop right there!” shouted the guard as he stood holding up a riot shield with his comrades to block the tunnel.

A rainbow-colored blur zoomed down the tunnel and collided with him, knocking him and his comrades out of the way like they were bowling pins.

“Nice try!” Rainbow Dash laughed as she sped on unimpeded.

A moment later, Fluttershy flew by them as well as they all continued lying there in a daze.

“Sorry! Sorry about this!” she said, bowing to them slightly as she passed.

“Fluttershy, will you stop apologizing to the bad guys?!” Rainbow called back to her. “And hurry up, I think we’re getting closer!”

One of the guards slowly sat up after the two pegasi had passed as he heard a voice in his ear.

“Squad 14, are you there? This is Commander Lugnut! Are the targets secure? Hello? Answer me!”

“The targets are… not secure,” he groaned, rubbing his head. “One of them is very polite, though--”

“Idiot!” Lugnut shouted, causing the guard to wince. “Get after them! Now!”

Meanwhile, Rainbow was practically laughing her head off as she continued down the tunnel, Fluttershy a short distance behind her.

“Can you believe these idiots?” she asked, brushing her mane out of her face. “They should know better than to stand in the way of a Wonderbolt reserve flyer!”

Fluttershy managed to catch up. “They don’t seem to be very effective,” she agreed. “But maybe they’re just having an off day.”

“Or maybe they’re sending the lamest guards before they send in the good ones!” Rainbow scoffed. Then her eyes brightened. “Hey, yeah! Any minute now, they’ll start sending in the heavy hitters! I can’t wait to see what they’re made of!”

“Rainbow!” Fluttershy cried. “Are you saying you want them to try harder to catch us?!”

Rainbow blinked, then grinned sheepishly. “Oh. Yeah, I guess not. But even if they do, they’ll have to try pretty hard to stop Tee! Did you hear that announcement?”

Fluttershy brightened. “That’s right!” she cried. “I’m so relieved to hear she’s all right!”

“Plus, with a robot on our side,” Rainbow said as she continued to fly, “we’re bound to win. I’ve seen what Tee can do. Nothing can stand up to a robot!”

They rounded a corner and came to large set of doors marked ‘Biological Research Laboratory.’

“Ugh,” Rainbow Dash groaned, “more egghead stuff in here, I bet. I remember biology back when I was a schoolfilly… the parts I was awake for, at least.”

Fluttershy glanced over her shoulder. “Well, I don’t think we should go back the way we came,” she said. “Let’s try going through here!”

“I guess you’re right,” Rainbow agreed, and the two of them entered.

“Whoa,” Rainbow Dash breathed.

“Oh my,” Fluttershy agreed.

Before them stood a forest. Somehow, it was contained in an almost impossibly cavernous room, the rocky ceiling high above them. And yet there it was: the rocky floor excavated and replaced with soil and grass from which grew towering trees. Through their branches, they spied bright sun lamps hanging from the ceiling providing artificial sunlight. There were even vents providing a light breeze that caused the leaves of the trees to rustle gently. Faintly, they could even hear birdsong.

“I take it back,” Rainbow said as she flew toward the trees. “This place is awesome!”

“It is!” Fluttershy cried. “Oh my goodness, Rainbow Dash, they built an underground forest!”

As they entered, Rainbow Dash paused, tapping her chin. “Yeah, but… why? What’s the point?”

“Hmm,” Fluttershy hummed, considering the question. “Well, the sign on the door said this was the Biological Research lab. They must be doing research on living things. I’m not sure what they’re studying these trees for… but it looks like there’s a nice path through them. Maybe the ponies of TechQuestria just like going for a walk in the forest just like normal ponies.”

“Pfft, yeah right! I bet those mad scientists are growing pony-eating trees or something!” She turned and glared at a nearby elm. “Yeah, I’ve got my eye on you, tree!” she said, poking it in the trunk.

Fluttershy chuckled. “Oh, Rainbow Dash,” she said. “Don’t be so paranoid! There’s nothing dangerous in this forest.”

“Fugitives located.”

They froze in midair, turning to look at the speaker, though they both already recognized the voice.

Standing at the entrance of the cavern, looking up at them with cold, glowing blue eyes, was Unit 004. The towering stallion had managed to come up behind them without being heard, though whether that was because he’d taken care to sneak up on them or because they’d simply been too distracted chatting about the forest to notice him was anypony’s guess. Now that they’d fallen silent, however, they heard each heavy step he took toward them, even on the soft, earthen floor.

“Surrender now,” 004 said as he approached. “This unit is authorized to use force to apprehend you if necessary. You have five seconds to comply.”

Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy exchanged a look.

“Fluttershy,” Rainbow Dash croaked, “I think we should--”

“Fly for it!” Fluttershy shrieked, and took off at an astonishing speed.

Rainbow was right behind her, but they heard the thunderous hoofsteps of 004 as he gave pursuit.

And then Rainbow Dash remembered what she’d just said a few minutes ago: ‘Nothing can stand up to a robot!’

For once, she would be very happy to be wrong.

“Activating U-Mode.”

There was a flash, and the towering robot teleported onto the path before them.

They both screamed as they tried to come to a halt. 004 aimed his glowing horn at them both.

“Up! Up!” Rainbow shouted, grabbing Fluttershy and giving a mighty flap of her wings, shooting straight up toward the canopy of branches overhead.

A bolt of magic narrowly missed her, singeing the hair on the tip of her tail.

The pair of pegasi took refuge in the branches of a tree, but a series of bolts cut through the leaves as 004 continued shooting at them.

“Rainbow Dash, we can’t stay here!” Fluttershy cried. “He’s--”

A bolt hit the branch Fluttershy sat on. She screamed and froze up in her fear and began tumbling downward until Rainbow Dash swooped and caught her, carrying her into the branches of another tree.

Rainbow put a hoof to her lips, silently urging Fluttershy to be quiet. She then pointed at one of her ears.

Fluttershy nodded, understanding what Rainbow Dash meant: 004, like Turing Test, had excellent hearing. Thus, if they spoke, he would hear them and be able to target them more accurately.

More bolts shot up through the branches, startling them, but they managed to keep quiet.

They both noticed the seemingly random pattern 004 was using and realized that he was trying to either scare them into moving or hoping he’d get a lucky shot. Either way, he’d eventually find them. They couldn’t stay there for much longer.

Rainbow rubbed her temples, then took on a decisive look. She pointed at Fluttershy and pointed off in the distance. She then pointed at herself and pointed downward.

Fluttershy tilted her head, raising an eyebrow.

Rainbow frowned. She pointed at Fluttershy again, this time taking her wings and moving them up and down. She then pointed at herself and then pointed down again, and raised her hooves in a boxing position, throwing several mock punches.

Fluttershy nearly gasped, but put her hooves over her mouth as she understood what Rainbow Dash was saying: she wanted Fluttershy to run and get help while she would stay and fight 004.

Fluttershy shook her head violently.

Rainbow Dash wore a confident smile and mimed pounding her own chest before giving Fluttershy a wink. Then, without another word (or motion), she leaped from her branch, swooping into 004’s field of vision for a moment before speeding away again.

004 momentarily turned his head, but then turned back to the tree where Fluttershy was hiding, realizing she hadn’t left. He chose to focus on her and readied another bolt of magic.

He heard a sudden whistling sound behind him, however, and was about to move when Rainbow Dash landed a flying kick to the back of his head, causing a loud clang to reverberate through the woods.

“I’m over here, big and ugly!” Rainbow taunted, laughing as she dashed away.

At last 004 turned his attention toward her, firing bolt after bolt at her.

Fluttershy took this as her cue and sprang from her hiding spot, flying over the treetops toward the end of this underground forest.

I’ve got to hurry! she told herself. Not even a pony as fast as Rainbow Dash can stand up to that horrible robot for long!

Back in the forest, 004 was still attempting to hit Rainbow Dash.

“Your speed and agility are unprecedented,” 004 said. “However, I am capable of refining my targeting algorithms. I will become more accurate. I will shoot you down. If you wish to avoid injury, you will surrender.”

He waited for a response, using his keen hearing to see if he could detect her breathing, a heartbeat, or something else to indicate exactly where she was. He knew which tree she was in, but not which branch. The leaves provided sufficient cover to make accurate targeting impossible.

“If you will not surrender, I will utilize more extreme measures,” 004 said. “I have orders to avoid causing severe bodily injury. However, if that is the only way to apprehend you, I will not hesitate to use deadly force. This is your final warning: surrender.”

He listened again…

Silence.

“Use of greater physical force is authorized,” he rumbled. “Activating E-Mode.”

Rainbow Dash was huddled in the bough of the tree, and she smirked when she heard him activate his E-Mode. What good was enhanced strength, after all, if he couldn’t even reach her all the way up there?

Below her, 004 walked up to the tree, turning around and aiming his back hooves at the tree’s trunk.

With one quick buck, he simply smashed the trunk of the mighty tree to pieces, blasting it apart and causing the top of the tree to topple toward the ground.

Rainbow found herself in a falling tree and gasped, jumping from the felled tree towards another tree nearby.

004 spotted her immediately. Target locked.

He fired a series of bolts at the top of the tree where Rainbow was flying, which made her dive lower. He rushed forward and sprang off one tree, leaping to another, propelling himself upward until he was directly in front of his prey.

“What--!”

He swung his foreleg at Rainbow Dash. She tried to roll away in midair, but 004’s hoof caught a glancing blow on her side, sending her flying through the forest and right into another tree trunk.

She cried out in pain as she fell to the ground, but managed to get up and propel herself into the branches of another tree.

She listened for 004 and heard him approaching, but he had momentarily halted his attack. She’d managed to give him the slip, at least for the moment.

She winced as she gingerly touched her side.

That rib’s bruised. Maybe broken, she realized. She drew in a breath through gritted teeth. Near her, another tree shook and collapsed. Then another tree, even closer than the first, fell as well. He would tear apart the whole forest to find her.

Fluttershy, I sure hope you find somepony quick! she shouted mentally. I can’t keep this up much longer!

***

Twilight took a running leap across the tracks at the tram station. During the day, Twilight had seen the platform filled with ponies of every race and age as they waited for the tram to arrive. Now it was dimly lit and deserted, and the quiet of the place was just a bit unsettling.

A moment later, Turing leaped across the gap as well and joined her, their hoofsteps echoing in the station and down the dark tram tunnels.

“Whew! I just made it across that gap,” Twilight said, raising her head proudly. “I guess getting in more exercise with Rainbow Dash is paying off!”

Turing Test turned to look at her. “Affirmative, Twilight Sparkle,” she said. “However, you also could have simply flown across the gap.”

Twilight paused before looking back at her wings, then smacked herself in the forehead, groaning. “Ugh… you spend your whole life as a unicorn, Turing, and it gets really easy to forget that you have wings.”

“As I have stated on previous occasions, I do not forget anything,” she replied, trotting over to a door marked ‘Security.’ “However, even if I were an organic pony, I am not certain how one could forget having certain body parts.”

Twilight rolled her eyes but chuckled nonetheless. “Trust me, it’s easier than you might think,” she said.

Turing turned the handle of the door. Unsurprisingly, it was locked.

“One moment, Twilight Sparkle,” she said. “I will now proceed to pick the lock. It will be a delicate, time-consuming procedure.”

She then turned around and, with one hoof, promptly kicked the door in, right off its hinges.

“Just kidding,” she said. “Ha ha, Twilight Sparkle.”

Twilight smiled. “You know, as odd as it is, I missed your sense of humor, Turing Test,” she said, trotting past her. “Now let’s see if there’s a hex key in here so I can get this suppression device off my horn.”

“I will stand guard outside, Twilight Sparkle,” Turing said. “Please search quickly, if possible.”

The small room had several cabinets and drawers. She was pleased to see that nothing appeared to be locked. She found numerous documents and procedure manuals, some weapons - including batons and a sash with a few gas grenades attached to it - and some radio earpieces.

Twilight found one and clicked it on, hearing nothing but static as she placed it in her ear. Maybe I can listen in on the guards, she thought to herself, grinning at the idea. That way Turing and I can avoid them!

She left it in her ear as she continued to search the room.

***

002 continued making her way through TechQuestria, taking care to choose paths that would let her maintain radio contact with her drones, but avoid any wandering patrols. Not that it would matter, but she was having too much fun to be bothered by them, nor did she feel like having to call any of them “Master” at the moment.

Then she detected a new radio signal from tram station #8, not far from Mechanical Engineering. Oddly, it was only one signal, and the guards were supposed to be patrolling in pairs at the very least.

She had the signal intercepted by one of her surveillance drones and relayed it to herself on her own frequency.

“--ot sure if it’s here, Turing. Just give me another minute to make sure.”

“Very well. But after that, we must proceed forward, Twilight Sparkle.”

002 paused. Well now… it seems I have located 003 and her keeper. Since they like to make friends, I should send them as many new friends as possible…

***

“Twilight Sparkle,” Turing said as she entered the security depot, “I do not wish to be bothersome, but I strongly suggest we--”

She stopped in mid-sentence as Twilight paused in the midst of looking through the supplies to raise her head. Turing spotted the small device in her ear.

“You’re probably right, Turing,” Twilight sighed. “I don’t think here’s a key in here anyway. Where to next?”

Rather than responding, Turing went over and snatched the radio earpiece from Twilight’s ear, throwing it to the ground and stomping on it.

“Hey!” Twilight shouted, glaring at Turing. “Turing, I was going to use that to listen in on the guards’ conversations!”

“My apologies, Twilight Sparkle, but certain ponies could detect the signal and use it to triangulate our location. Furthermore, it could even have been used to listen in on our conversations if it were not handled properly.”

Twilight’s eyes bulged. “Oh,” she replied quietly. “I see. I’m sorry, Turing. In that case, I’m glad you did that. Well, you’re right, we should probably… Turing?”

She paused, noticing the way Turing’s ears were raised as her head turned back toward the door.

“Turing, what is it?”

“We have been detected,” Turing whispered. “Please stay here, Twilight Sparkle. I will protect you.”

“But--”

“Without your magic, you will be vulnerable. Allow me to deal with the situation.”

Twilight’s ears lay flat, but she nodded. “Okay,” she said.

Turing turned back to the door and exited. Her ears detected a great many hooves galloping towards them. She stood on the platform of the station as a large group of security guards came down the stairs. Another group, composed entirely of pegasi, came in through the tunnel to the left, while a third group, made up of earth ponies, came through the tunnel to the right.

In a matter of seconds, they had Turing and Twilight surrounded.

Twilight was still inside the little security station as Turing blocked the door, standing with her legs spread slightly apart and her head raised in a defiant, defensive position.

One of the guards, wearing a captain’s rank insignia on her uniform’s collar, stepped forward.

“Unit 003,” said the guard captain, “we have you and Twilight Sparkle surrounded. You are to surrender to us, step aside, deactivate, and permit us to take her into custody. Is that understood?”

“It is understood,” Turing replied, “but I will not comply.”

The captain frowned. “003, under whose orders are you operating right now?”

“I am now operating with Twilight Sparkle as my end user,” she replied. “I have regained my memory, and, if necessary, I will take whatever measures are necessary to protect her and my other friends. Please retreat and leave us be.”

The captain sighed. “I was afraid of that,” she grumbled. “All right then, 003: activate emergency maintenance code B10M04D--!”

“Turing, don’t listen!” Twilight shouted.

The world around Turing went silent to her. “Auditory systems disengaged,” she stated. “You cannot control me.”

“That’s it… guards, we have no choice: shock troopers, disable the automaton!” the captain bellowed.

Three pegasi swooped in. They wore rubber boots on their hooves and tinted goggles over their eyes. On each of their backs between their wings was a battery pack which was connected by a cable to a long metal baton they held in their hooves. They aimed these batons at Turing Test, and each of them pressed the switches on the handles. The batons emitted a soft hum that quickly grew in pitch.

“Turing, look out!” Twilight shouted.

But Turing only stood there, apparently because she still couldn’t hear any of them, as the batons shot forth bolts of electricity that rained down on her. The room was aglow as the bluish bolts flowed and entangled themselves in long, crackling tendrils that coursed down the length of Turing’s body.

“Turing!” Twilight screamed.

“Gas grenades!” the captain ordered.

A few unicorns stepped forward and took out their gas grenades, removing the pins and then tossing them over Turing Test and into the small room with Twilight. White plumes of gas began to fill the room. Twilight gasped and took a deep breath before the gas filled the air.

However, just when it seemed that the guards had them, Turing simply leaped up and tackled one of the pegasus troopers, causing the other two to stop using their electrical weapons.

She stood before them, smoke rising from her but otherwise completely unharmed.

“I thought they said that much electricity would fry her systems!” one of the shock troopers shouted.

Turing raised her head. “Engaging U-Mode,” she said, causing her horn to appear. Without another word, she fired two bolts of magic at the hovering pegasi, knocking them out of the air. She then scrambled over to where Twilight Sparkle was standing in an increasingly large cloud of noxious smoke.

“Switching to P-Mode.”

Her horn retracted, and her wings appeared. Her jets roared to life, but rather than flying, she directed the force of them into the gas cloud, blowing it back out of the room and toward the guards.

“Masks!” the captain shouted. “Try not to breathe that stuff in!”

The ponies complied, hurrying to put on gas masks, but the cloud of gas filled the tram station, obscuring their sight.

“Switching to E-Mode.”

Distracted by the acrid burning and choking fumes from the gas, the guards were further put into a panic as Turing nimbly weaved in and out of sight, the sound of her hooves on the concrete platform zigzagging all around them the only clue to where she was. The guards began to panic as she landed perfectly-placed blows on them, knocking them out before she vanished back into the cloud of smoke.

“Squad 54 to Central Command!” the captain screamed, holding her hoof to her ear. “We’re being overwhelmed! Send backup! I repeat, send--”

There was another dull whack, and the captain’s voice fell silent. She slumped to the ground, knocked unconscious by a metallic hoof to the back of the head.

A moment later, the gas dissipated, revealing the platform of the station completely littered with the bodies of unconscious guards.

Twilight coughed a little as she emerged from the guard station.

“Good work, Turing,” she managed to say, though she was still breathing hard after holding her breath. She glanced around, taking in the sight of their defeated foes. “Wow. Very good work.”

Turing still said nothing.

Twilight sighed and tapped Turing on the shoulder. Once she had the robot’s attention, she pointed at her own ear to indicate what she meant.

“Ah. Understood. Re-engaging auditory systems,” Turing said. “You may proceed.”

“I was just complimenting you on how you took down all those guards,” Twilight said. Then she looked to Turing with concern. “Are you all right? I saw all that electricity, and I was worried about what it might do to you!”

“There is no cause for concern, Twilight Sparkle,” Turing said. “Have you forgotten that Gadget equipped me with a Faraday cage for the purpose of rendering me resistant to electrical shocks?”

“Ahhh, that’s right!” Twilight said, flashing a broad grin. “I did forget. And I guess somepony forgot to tell the guards about it, too!”

“It seems so. Also, since being reprogrammed to assist TechQuestria, I was also equipped with more advanced combat techniques. I doubt that the ponies who restored me would have thought that I would use those techniques on them.”

“It also looks like they fixed your wings, too,” she remarked, giving her a smile. “I bet you’re glad to have those back!”

“I am,” Turing replied, glancing at the panel on her back. “Though it is inaccurate to say they have been ‘repaired.’ You will recall that my wings had been removed due to their disrepair and were still absent when I was abducted from Ponyville. Rather, it seems that they have been ‘replaced.’ Apparently, the TechQuestrians were still in possession of a spare set of wings, although I detect a slight difference in size and weight compared to my previous wings. Puzzling.”

Twilight’s eyes widened, and her expression tightened as she looked away.

Turing tilted her head when she noticed the change in Twilight’s demeanor. “Twilight Sparkle, your expression seems distressed,” she said. “Have I said something inappropriate?”

“Oh, um… no,” Twilight said, shaking her head. “It’s…”

She paused, considering what to say. Should I tell her where those wings and her other replacement parts might have come from? she wondered. No… after everything else that’s been going on, I don’t want to weigh her down by telling her that some of her body parts were probably taken from her late twin brother.

“...It’s not important right now. I’ll tell you later, Turing.”

“If you say so,” Turing said. “In the meantime, I suggest we leave this location before the guards regain consciousness or reinforcements arrive.”

“Okay, but first, let’s make sure they can’t try to use any more emergency maintenance codes on you,” Twilight said.

“Understood,” she said. “One moment… scanning for emergency maintenance codes… codes deleted.”

“Great,” Twilight said, breathing a sigh of relief. “Also, I’m going to take one of those electric weapons. I’d hate to use something like this on another pony, but not as much as I hate being defenseless without my magic. At least this way, you won’t have to do all the work.”

“Very well. Please also take the insulating boots and goggles to protect yourself.”

“Will do,” Twilight said, going to one of the shock troopers and removing their gear. “Between this and the gas grenades I found, I’m developing a regular arsenal!”

A moment later, they were about to leave when they heard a buzzing sound. They both looked up and saw a drone flying on a propeller emerge from an overhead vent.

“Turing, what is that?” Twilight whispered.

“It is a surveillance drone,” Turing replied. “It is capable of transmitting audio and using sound to scan and map an area.”

“Then we need to get rid of it!” Twilight said, aiming her newly-acquired shock baton at the thing.

“Wait one moment, Twilight Sparkle,” Turing said, raising her foreleg to stop her. She then pointed at a group of smaller machines crawling out of the vent as well. They were rectangular and dark gray and crawled around on spindly insectoid legs. They crawled from the vent and along the wall like a swarm of roaches.

“Those are swarm drones,” Turing explained. “They are experimental machines designed to work in confined quarters. They are quite versatile, but a single pony has thus far not shown the capability to use them with coordination. The only one I have seen use them is Unit 002. It stands to reason that 002 is controlling them now.”

The little swarm drones moved about on the wall and quickly used their bodies to form letters which read: ‘CORRECT.’

Twilight’s nervous expression did not subside. “That’s all the more reason we should zap them and leave!” Twilight hissed. “I don’t trust her at all!”

“But Twilight Sparkle,” Turing protested, “002 helped me to regain my memory. Why would she help me before only to do us harm now?”

Twilight paused, tapping her chin as she considered the question. “Well, she could have been ordered to capture us. In that case, she’d have to follow her orders no matter what she helped you for! And she didn’t give me the best first impression.”

“You may be correct, Twilight Sparkle,” Turing said, still keeping her gaze focused on the swarm drones. “But if 002 is attempting to aid us, then she may prove to be an invaluable ally. Also…”

Twilight raised an eyebrow. “Also…?” she asked, urging her to continue.

“I want to believe that one of my siblings is trying to help us,” Turing said, raising her head. “She attempted to strike up a conversation with me earlier. Perhaps she also wishes to have a relationship with me.”

Twilight pursed her lips, glancing back at the drones uncertainly. “I’m still not sure this is a good idea, Turing,” she said. “But if you think we should trust her, I’ll support you.”

The swarm drones reformed on the wall to make the image of a smiling face. Again, this did nothing to set her mind at ease.

“002,” Turing said, looking up at the surveillance drone, “are you attempting to guide us?”

Rather than form another word, the swarm drones crawled across the tram platform, then down and next to the tracks. They reformed into an arrow pointing into the tunnel.

“It seems we should go that way, Twilight Sparkle,” she said.

“But Turing, we’re supposed to be going to--” She froze, catching herself as she looked up at the surveillance drone. “--our destination.”

“This will also lead us in the right direction,” Turing replied. “Shall we?”

Twilight bit her lip for a moment, but then gave a resigned sigh and nodded.

The two hopped off the platform and onto the tracks. They followed as the drones led them into the darkened tunnel.

***

A squad of four guards made their way down a tunnel near the Magitech Department. As they passed a side tunnel, one of them stopped, using her magic to shine a flashlight down it.

“Something wrong, Billie Club?” the squad leader asked.

“I think I heard something, ma’am,” she replied. “Just a second, let me check it out.”

“All right, but be careful,” the squad leader said.

“Understood, ma’am,” Billie Club said, and trotted down the tunnel. She rounded a corner, disappearing from sight momentarily.

There was a moment of silence, so the squad leader called “Anything there?”

“No, ma’am!” she called back. “I guess I-- hey! They’re he--”

There was a dull thud followed by Billie Club sailing back into view, tumbling head over hooves.

“Intruders!” the squad leader shouted, holding up her baton. “Don’t let them escape!”

She and the other three guards rounded the corner, finding themselves face to face with… nothing more than an empty tunnel.

“Did they run away?” asked another guard, swallowing nervously.

“They must have,” the squad leader said. “You two get Billie Club some medical attention. I’ll stay behind to stand guard and radio for reinforcements. Rejoin me as soon as you’re able.”

“Yes, ma’am!” they both said, saluting her as they picked up the unconscious Billie Club.

Staring into the dark, empty tunnel, keeping her baton raised and her flashlight shining into the depths, she raised a hoof to her ear.

“Central Command, this is Lieutenant Night Stick of Squad 15,” she said into the radio. “One of my squad has been attacked. We were unable to locate the assailant, but we believe it to be one of the Royalist fugitives. I’m at a side tunnel in section E102, near the Magitech Department. Requesting backup.”

“Understood, Lieutenant,” the voice of the dispatcher said. “Squads 32 and 33 will be directed to your location.”

“Roger that,” Night Stick said, and removed her hoof from the earpiece. She continued staring down the hallway, patiently awaiting the arrival of her backup or the return of her other squad members.

Then she heard a deep rumble. Her ears twitched at the sound. It almost sounded like… somepony’s stomach growling?

She blinked and glanced up.

Gadget was clinging to the rafters on the ceiling with her mechanical arms, and Umahara was clinging to her. The pair of them grinned down at her sheepishly.

“Um… hi?” Gadget said. Then she let go and dropped down toward Night Stick.

Night Stick gasped and reached for her earpiece, but Gadget landed on her, pinning her to the floor before a series of punches from Gadget’s mechanical fists pummeled her into submission.

“Sorry about giving us away. I guess I’m hungrier than I realized. Still, that’s one less guard to worry about,” Gadget said. She glanced over to Umahara, who still had his forelegs wrapped around her barrel. “Um, we’re not clinging to the ceiling anymore; you can let go now.”

“O-oh, right!” Umahara said, chuckling sheepishly as he let go of her. Then he glanced down at the unconscious Night Stick, and his expression changed to a frown as his ears drooped.

Gadget tilted her head as she watched him. “What’s that look for?” she asked.

“It’s just… I knew her,” he said. “Night Stick was a good guard. She was never late. She was always helpful. I… I never expected I’d have to fight her.”

“Technically I’m the one that fought her. You’re just an accessory!” Gadget said, offering him a smile, but the way he looked at her made her stop. “Sorry.”

“No, it’s fine,” he sighed. “I’ve made my decision, so I’ll live with it. Anyway, we need to go. Let’s cut through the Magitech Department.”

“Wait, I thought you said we should take the side tunnels!” Gadget exclaimed. “Going right through your old department sounds like a good way to get caught!”

“It might be, but now that Night Stick called for reinforcements, the tunnels will be crawling with guards. Most of the Magitech personnel are either asleep or assisting with New Dawn. If we’re careful, we can sneak through--”

“Okay, okay, just lead the way,” Gadget said, glancing over her shoulder. “We’ll get caught for sure if we stay here.”

“Right,” he said, and motioned for her to follow him. The two of them swiftly made their way to the entrance of the Magitech Department.

“Okay, through these doors is a hallway that leads to a security door,” Umahara whispered, looking to the left and right as they stood before the doors. He drew out a spell card. “There’s a guard on duty, but I’m betting they haven’t figured out what I’ve done just yet, so he should let me in. In the meantime, this spell card will create an invisibility spell for you, so stay close and I can sneak you in. Hold it close, Gadget, and try not to make too much noise.”

Gadget took the spell card. “Wait, why didn’t we just use these to sneak around before?” she asked.

“Because I only managed to get one,” he replied hurriedly. “They’re expensive and difficult to make and they only last for about a minute! I was going to save it for an emergency, but if the guard sees you coming up the hallway, he’ll sound the alarm for sure!”

“Okay, okay,” she said exasperatedly. “Sorry I asked! So, what, I just press this button?”

She pressed it and then swiftly faded from view.

“Whoa, cool!” she said, laughing giddily. He could hear her hooves as she danced around excitedly. “Hey, guess how many fingers my mechanical hand is holding up!”

Umahara smirked. “Just stay close and stay quiet,” he said, and pushed open the door to the entrance.

Through the doors was a long white hallway with a door at the end. The place looked almost sterilized, with a smell that reminded Gadget of a hospital.

Just before the door was a small booth with a security guard inside. The guard looked up from the magazine he was reading at the sound of Umahara entering and watched him stroll casually up to the window of the booth.

“Good evening!” Umahara said to the security guard through the small holes in the thick glass.

The guard smiled. “Evening, Mr. Umahara,” he said. “I thought your shift was over. Figured you’d be resting up until New Dawn started.”

“I just came to check on something,” Umahara said, giving him an easy smile. “Mind letting me in?”

“Sure, sure,” the guard said, reaching for the button that would unlock the front gate. Then he paused. “Actually, I just remembered that they want us to call in anypony who comes in outside the schedule.”

Umahara kept his expression, but he just barely heard Gadget suck in a breath.

“Is that really necessary?” Umahara asked, rolling his eyes.

“Don’t worry. It’ll only take a minute,” the guard said, reaching for his earpiece.

“Oh, the heck with it!” Gadget shouted. One of her invisible mechanical hands transformed into a piston, which she used to smash through the protective glass and send the guard flying back into the wall.

The guard struggled to get up, looking around frantically to see what unseen force had assaulted him, but Gadget was already on him, using the taser at the end of another arm to shock him. Finally, he slumped to the floor.

“Darn it, Gadget, that wasn’t necessary!” Umahara shouted, smacking himself in the forehead. “Central Command might not even know that I’ve defected yet!”

“And if they do, then that guard would’ve brought every guard they had down on us,” Gadget said as she slowly began to fade back into view. “Look, they’ll figure it out eventually. Let’s try to get out of here before that happens.” Then she looked down at her hoof and sighed. “Aww, I wish that could have lasted a little longer. Being invisible was cool.”

She pressed the button on the guard’s panel, causing the doors to the Magitech Department to buzz and then swing open.

Umahara sighed, but had to smile at her bravado. “You know, when I first met you, you seemed kind of timid,” he said as they walked inside. “I never would have thought you could be this… gutsy.”

She blushed slightly at that. “I’m not… that is, sometimes I can be a little timid around strangers, b-but when there’s a job to do, I just focus on getting it done!”

“I think that’s admirable,” he said. And a little scary, he added mentally.

“C-come on, you’re embarrassing me,” she said, her blush deepening. She picked up her pace and trotted ahead of him. “Anyway, so what is it that you ponies do here? What sort… of…”

She slowed her pace as they passed several rooms with windows along the hallway.

Inside were rows and rows of computers. She’d seen similar devices when she’d been in Talon Turing’s lab at King Bullion’s College in Trottingham, but rather than having tape reels, there were large golden discs turning on the fronts of them.

“Runic computers,” Umahara said, raising his head with a touch of pride as he came up alongside her. “Professor Cobbler figured out how to use the ancient Yudacorn runes, and we’ve been using them for our computing. It’s still a long way from perfection, but it can already do a lot more than what Talon Turing’s working on, if that’s what it reminds you of.”

“Wow,” Gadget breathed, walking closer to the windows. “What are they calculating?”

“Some of them are running analyses of geological survey data so we can figure out where to excavate new tunnels for TechQuestria,” he said. “A few more are predicting where those who resist…”

Gadget paused and looked back at him, noting his expression.

“What? What were you going to say?” she asked.

“It’s predicting where ponies who resist the new government will migrate after the coup,” Umahara replied. “Most of TechQuestria doesn’t even know we’re running those calculations, but enough council members demanded it that we started. But nopony can agree on if we’re even calculating it right. There are just so many assumptions…”

He trailed off, making a face.

“W-well we won’t even have to worry about it,” Gadget said, getting his attention, “after we stop this New Dawn thing from starting!”

Umahara blinked. “Stop it?” he asked. He rubbed his temple, shaking his head. “Gadget, we’re not trying to stop it. I just don’t want to be part of it.”

“What?!” she cried, wincing as her voice echoed in the hallway. “Why not?!”

“Gadget, what we’ve built, nopony will be able to stand up to…”

She listened as he told her what exactly New Dawn entailed. As she listened, her eyes grew larger and larger.

“No,” she breathed. “And this secret weapon of theirs… this ‘Harmonic Drive’ at the heart of it? It actually works?”

“We never got the chance to test it,” he said, motioning for her to follow as they continued making their way through the department. “But the theory is sound: I worked on it myself. And they should only need it if they can’t stop Twilight and her friends. Either way, New Dawn is unstoppable.”

Gadget tapped her chin. “But… wait, to make all that magitech run, they’d need a huge amount of thaumatrium!”

“Well, yeah, that’s why we have the thaumatrium refinery here--”

“It’s here?!” Gadget cried. “Then if we sabotage the refinery, then at least they’ll have a shorter supply of the stuff!”

“I… I mean, sure, but we don’t have time to--”

“We’re already passing through here!” Gadget said, seizing his hoof in her own, looking up at him pleadingly. “Let’s throw a wrench or two into their plans while we still can! You want to make up for helping them all this time, right?”

“I…” He heaved a sigh. “All right, fine. It’s on the way, I suppose. But if it’s not safe, then we just move on.”

He led her through another doorway into the core of the Magitech Department.

Again, she gawked at the sight before her.

They were inside what looked like a giant metallic sphere. The light reflecting off the greenish tint of the metal panels lining the walls cast a strange glow over everything. Throughout the center of the sphere was a network of catwalks leading to different subsections of the department.

“This way,” he whispered, motioning for her to follow him across a catwalk. Though there didn’t appear to be anypony around - which made the area eerily quiet - she still felt oddly exposed in the huge, open area.

Then they heard a buzzing sound overhead. They looked up and saw numerous drones hovering around the catwalks, weaving in and out like little metallic sentries.

Umahara took out a spell card and activated it. A moment later, a small, pale blue bubble enveloped them both.

“Keep quiet,” he said to Gadget, his voice barely above a whisper. “This is a sound-cancelling spell. It neutralizes the sound of anything inside it to those outside. Those drones are surveillance drones. If they detect us, they’ll send the security forces here. We should be safe, but the spell won’t neutralize anything that’s too loud.”

Gadget nodded silently as the two of them crept along the walkway.

***

002 was enjoying herself immensely. Observing how these organics stumbled around alternately fighting or avoiding each other was far more entertaining than she’d hoped!

Let’s see… Applejack is nearly at her destination, unless Valentine finishes her off first, Pinkie Pie and Rarity are trapped inside Acoustics, 004 should be dealing with Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy, and Twilight Sparkle and 003 are following my little drones… and watching those ignorant guards continuously fail to catch any of them is just so… what word would the organics call the emotion?

She paused, considering it.

‘Satisfying.’ Yes… this is so satisfying. It’s a shame I don’t have any other playmates…

Just then, she noticed she was getting some strange readings from the Magitech Department. Her drones didn’t detect any ponies in the core, but there was a curious anomaly on one of the catwalks. Normally, the soundwaves from her drones would reflect back, giving her a picture of the place. But some of the soundwaves on the catwalk were not bouncing back, as if there was a hole in it.

And the hole seemed to be… moving?

“Sound cancelling?” she wondered aloud. Her singular yellow eye moved back and forth as she considered the problem. Scanning data… what could cancel sound waves that would be capable of movement?

Just then, her radio receiver came to life:

“Attention all units: we’ve just confirmed that Councilpony Champ Umahara has committed acts of treason and sabotage against TechQuestria. Spell cards have been stolen from the supply sent to New Dawn, and we’ve received reports that the Royalist prisoner Gadgette Giroux has been freed. The guards on duty confirmed Umahara’s involvement. He is to be detained on sight and not to be given the same regard as the Elements.”

002 raised her head. A spell card. I see…

She sent a signal to Central Command.

“Central Command,” the radio operator said.

“This is Unit 002,” she said. “Inform Master Lugnut immediately that I believe I have located Mr. Umahara.”

While the operator notified Commander Lugnut, she received another signal from her surveillance drones: Applejack had arrived at the Archives.

So… very… satisfying.

***

Applejack had followed the singular tunnel down further than she would have expected without an end in sight. Every side tunnel she arrived at was blocked by another floodgate. Yet the main tunnel itself grew wider and wider, until she finally arrived at a gaping doorway that stood nearly ten meters tall.

What the hay are they keepin’ in there? she wondered.

There was no time to think about the answer as she heard the sound of hooves still galloping behind her. That crazy nurse was still on her tail!

She ran through the doors into a cavernous room, but the overhead lights were turned off, leaving it in total darkness. She hesitated and looked back to see that Valentine was still running down the tunnel.

But then she heard another noise and spotted a group of swarm drones crawling up the wall to a panel next to the door. With their little legs, they pried the face of the panel off and began disconnecting and reconnecting the wires. There was a spark of electricity, and the massive steel doors began to slide shut, rumbling like thunder along their treads.

“Stop!” Valentine shouted as she galloped closer and closer. “Applejack, get away from there! That’s where--”

The doors shut, locking Valentine out and leaving Applejack in total darkness. However, a moment later, the overhead lights came on, allowing her to see where she was.

Her mouth dropped open at the sight.

The room was a cavernous warehouse. Shelf after towering shelf was filled with boxes and wooden crates. They stretched a seemingly endless distance back into the room. She obviously wasn’t going to be able to exit the way she came in, so there was no choice but to find another way out.

She looked down and saw that the little swarm bots were forming themselves into the shape of an arrow.

“What the… are you little robot critters tryin’ to help?” she asked.

The swarm drones made no sound but continued pointing the arrow down an aisle.

“Well, I ain’t one to trust robot varmints,” she said, narrowing her eyes at them, “but then again, until Turing Test changed my mind, I wasn’t keen on robots at all. All right, I’ll follow ya, but y’all best not be leadin’ me into trouble.”

The swarm drones skittered along the floor, leading her through a veritable maze of shelves until at last they came to a large crate sitting on the bottom shelf. This crate was different from the others: it was metallic, and the lid of it was sealed tight and padlocked.

The swarm drones swarmed around the lock, looking like they were trying to yank it off. They then formed an arrow again, emphatically pointing at the crate once more.

“What… y’all want me to open this? What for?”

The drones surrounded her, scurrying underhoof, jumping at her as if trying to urge her on.

“Hey, hey, no need to get yer tail in a knot!” she snapped. “All right, all right, lemme see what I can do.”

She looked at the lock. She didn’t have a key, of course, but she thought that perhaps she could buck the lock right off. After all, with her enhanced strength, she reasoned, such a feat should be foal’s play.

“Okay, stand back!” she said, aiming her back hooves at the lock. “Here… we… go!”

She kicked as hard as she could, and the lock snapped right off. The top of the crate also popped off, leaving the lid slightly ajar.

The swarm drones crawled up the side of the crate and pushed the lid off completely. They then began to dig inside.

Curious, Applejack got up on her hind legs and peered in as well. The box was filled with packing straw, but the swarm bots were clearing it away. At last, they revealed a rectangular panel. They lifted it up, revealing a large red button.

“Hey now, what does that button--”

Before she could ask, one of the drones jumped on the button, pressing it. An electric hum emanated from the machine inside the straw.

The drones all scattered, scrambling away from the crate like a swarm of cockroaches when somepony turned on the kitchen light.

“Hey!” Applejack shouted. “Where are you little critters goin?!”

She tried to pursue them, but they were all gone in an instant.

“What in Equestria’s gotten into them? An’ just how’s whatever in that crate supposed to help--”

There was a loud clang and the crate lurched forward. Applejack whirled around. Whatever was inside the crate was moving.

Clang!

The crate lurched forward again, the edge of it now teetering over the rim of the shelf. There was a strange chattering sound coming from inside the crate.

Something was throwing itself against the side, trying to get out.

Applejack lowered her head and began to back away, not taking her eyes off the crate. This was a bad idea, she thought. Never trust a varmint, I always say! Why’d I go an’ make an exception fer a robot varmint?!

With a final clang, the crate tilted forward and toppled over, spilling some of the packing straw out onto the floor. The thing inside slowly moved. Applejack saw its pale, glowing green eyes looking at her.

“N-now, you just stay where you are!” Applejack shouted, backing away. “I don’t want no trouble from you, whatever you are! So just--”

The thing suddenly burst from the box, leaping at Applejack as it let out a terrifying, distorted screech!

Applejack screamed and tried to run, but stumbled backwards as the thing pounced on her!

...Or rather, it landed right in front of her. She stared up at it as it sat down, looking back at her. It made no move to attack, but just sat there, watching her and tilting its head back and forth with what seemed like curiosity.

“Wait,” she breathed, “you… yer another…”

The thing before her was another robot pony. This one, however, had a darker, dingier hue to its exterior. Rather than the large glowing eyes that Turing Test had, this had circular lenses with only a pale green dot in each. Rather than a few slits for a mouth, this being actually had a hinged jaw that moved as it made little sounds. The conical coils that Turing had for a mane and tail were present, but they were stiffer and hung over this robot’s head like yarn hung from the head of a filly’s doll. When it moved, it had a strange, rickety quality to it, unlike the smooth movement Turing had.

Still, she couldn’t deny that this robot bore a striking resemblance to Turing Test.

“What the…another robot?” Applejack whispered.

The robot tilted its head. “Ro?” it asked, its voice high-pitched and squeaky. “Row boat? Me rowboat?”

“N-no,” Applejack said slowly as she got to her hooves. “Robot. Yer a robot. Or, uh… an automaton?”

The robot nodded her head. “Tomato ton,” she said, nodding her head. “Meep!”

Applejack blinked. “Uh… right. Listen, uh… I’m tryin’ to find my way outta here, so if you could--”

“Peaches and cream!” the robot shouted, bouncing toward Applejack, her joints making a squealing sound as she noisily landed, sounding like a cart full of pots and pans. “Peach pie! Peach can! Peachy keen! Peachy peachy peach peach!”

Applejack frowned. “Okay, look, I gotta go find my friends,” she said. “If ya don’t know where I can find a door, then I--”

“Door!” the robot cried, nodding her head emphatically. “Me know! Me know door!”

“Wait, you do?” Applejack asked.

“Me know! Door! You come! Me go you door!”

“Well… sure,” Applejack said, and followed the strange robot.

The two of them made their way through the aisles. Applejack wasn’t certain that the robot knew where she was going, but it wasn’t like she had many other options. And while the robot mostly seemed prone to spouting random gibberish, she also seemed to understand language well enough to understand what Applejack was looking for.

“So, uh… hey there, Miss Robot,” Applejack began, walking alongside the robot, “I was wondering’ if ya had a name? My name's Applejack, by the way.”

The robot turned to her. “Nacho.”

Applejack blinked. “Sorry, did you say ‘Nacho?’”

But the robot shook her head. “Najoja.”

“‘Na-jo-ja?’”

This time the robot nodded. “Not! Not Joja!”

Applejack blinked. “Wait… ‘Not Joja?’ Are ya tellin’ me what yer name isn’t?”

The robot nodded. “Not Da say Not Joja.”

“I… see?”

“Icy! Icy! Ice tea!”

Applejack stifled a giggle. “Well, you sure are a funny little robot, whatever yer name is.”

The robot paused. “Me funny?”

“Well, yeah,” Applejack said, smiling at her.

The robot tilted her head to the left and right for a moment. Then, to Applejack’s surprise, she came up next to her and rested her head on Applejack’s shoulder.

“Well, I’ll be,” Applejack said. “Guess maybe I finally found another nice robot like Turing Test.”

The robot raised her head. “Two ring?”

“Uh, that’s ‘Turing.’ She’s yer… well, I guess she’s probably yer sister.”

The robot raised her head. “Sissa? Me sissa?”

“I think so,” she said, tapping her chin. “You definitely look like her… in some ways, I mean.”

“Mean… mean sissa?”

Applejack shook her head. “No, no, she ain’t mean. She’s real nice!”

The robot tilted her head again. This time she covered one eye and seemed to glare at Applejack.

“Sissa?” the robot asked.

Applejack frowned. She’s imitatin’ 002, she realized.

“No, not that sister,” Applejack replied. “Another one.”

“Nutha sissa!” the robot cried, and began leaping around. “Nutha sissa! Nutha nutha zero zero!”

“Yeah, another… wait, ‘zero zero?’”

But before she could ask about that, the robot suddenly dashed off.

“Hey, hold on a minute there!” Applejack shouted, chasing her. “Wait fer me!”

She rounded a corner and found herself facing another door, just like the robot had said. Or rather, a pair of steel doors.

“Zero!” the robot cried, pointing at the doors.

Sure enough, Applejack saw that a large zero had been painted in red on the doors. She also noticed that a yellow and black striped pattern had been painted on the doorframe along with the word ‘DANGER’ printed over and over again.

And that’s when she saw that the swarm drones were messing with the panel next to the doorway.

“Hey now, don’t--”

The doors buzzed and began to slide open.

“Oh boy,” Applejack gulped, bracing herself for whatever was inside. But before she could react to that, she heard a sound from overhead. She glanced up in time to see that Funny Valentine, having crawled through the ventilation system, had kicked off the vent cover and was leaping down at her, a surgical saw drawn and ready to strike.

“Look out!” Applejack shouted as Valentine dove and took a swipe at her with the razor sharp saw. The saw narrowly missed as Applejack leaped out of the way and ran over to the robot’s side. “Look out, robot, that nurse ain’t playin’ around!”

“Play round?” the robot asked, merely glancing at Valentine.

“Hold still!” Valentine shouted, throwing a syringe at Applejack.

“Duck!” Applejack shouted, rolling out of the way. But then she saw to her horror that the robot was merely standing there.

She closed her eyes as she heard metal striking metal. When she opened them, however, the robot was still standing there.

“Hey… you all right?” she asked.

The robot turned her head. The syringe was just barely embedded into her forehead.

“Me catch!” she said, pointing at the syringe. She then turned to Valentine and began to bounce up and down. “Again! Play round!”

“Oh, great, looks like you found the junk heap,” Valentine sighed. “Just keep out of my way!”

Without another word, she instantly turned and tossed another volley of scalpels at Applejack.

Unprepared for the volley, Applejack’s heart leaped into her throat. But then the robot dove in front of her, intercepting the scalpels.

When she landed, Applejack saw she’d caught all of them in her mouth.

The robot dropped them on the floor. “Out da way!”

“Look, will you just move?!” Valentine shouted.

“You just move!” the robot repeated.

“Not me, you, stupid!”

“You stupid!”

“I’m not… augh!” Valentine stomped her hoof.

“Augh!” the robot said, imitating Valentine’s tone of voice and stomping both of her front hooves petulantly.

“You… no more miming me, I mean it!”

“Anybody got a peanut?”

Applejack burst out laughing. “Hoowee, Valentine,” she managed to say, wiping a tear from her eye. “Gotta say, yer not so scary when this here robot is practically runnin’ laps around ya.” She went over to the robot and plucked the syringe from her forehead. “Maybe you should just quit.”

Valentine narrowed her eyes at Applejack. “That ‘robot’ is just a malfunctioning piece of scrap that you should have left in its box,” she said. “That’s Unit 001, the first ‘functional’ automaton Cobbler Mustang built using runic technology.”

Applejack blinked. “Using what now?”

“Whachoo talkin bout?”

“Not now, 001,” Applejack said, putting her hoof on 001’s shoulder.

“It’s a long story,” Valentine said, “but to make it short: Celestia’s policies caused the death of Professor Cobbler’s daughter, so he used his knowledge of an arcane magic and his automaton building skills to try and preserve her mind in a mechanical body. 001 was the result.”

001 looked back and forth between Valentine and Applejack. “Bork?” she asked.

“Needless to say,” Valentine sighed, “the process didn’t quite work. The result was this simpleminded experiment. But, on the upside, she was the first of the automata.”

“I one of the tomatoes?” 001 asked.

“Looks like,” Applejack said. “I mean… sorta.”

“Listen, Applejack,” Valentine said, “I’ve called for backup. The other guards are trying to get in here as we speak. There’s no way out of here, so just give up quietly, and I won’t sever your tendons.”

“Well, if there’s no way outta here, then where’s this door lead?” Applejack asked.

“What door?” Valentine asked, turning her head.

She froze. Her eyes went wide.

“Oh no… oh no no no no… what did you two idiots do?!”

Without another word, she rushed through the doors.

That don’t sound good, Applejack thought, and followed Valentine to see what had her so panicked.

There in the room was a statue of some sorts. It was worn in certain spots, but it looked as though it was made of baked clay. It was painted purple and gold, and it had yellow jewels for eyes. It also had some strange writing on its forehead.

And that’s when they saw the swarm drones with a paint can, swiftly repainting one of the symbols.

“No!” Valentine screamed. “Stop them!”

But then the thing’s eyes began to glow. It slowly got to its hooves, rising up further and further like a monolithic colossus. A low moaning sound like that of a whale emanated from it.

Valentine and Applejack began to back away.

“It’s awake,” Valentine whimpered. “U-unit Zero… the golem!”

The golem fixed its gaze on the pair of them and let out a deafening roar that shook them to their bones. It lowered its head and charged.

To be continued...

Author's Notes:

Next time: as everypony tries to escape from TechQuestria, 002's game of hide and seek intensifies...

Some special production notes here:
First, this is the first chapter to feature all four members of Turing's family (though not in the same space, and not including 003S).
Also, now that 001's here, I can tell a teeny bit of her design history. As I've stated elsewhere on blogs, Turing got her number 003 in part because her finalized design was the third iteration Greenfinger drew of her. But Turing's rudimentary (read: fugly) original design came to influence the design of 001, especially with regard to her eye shape and her moving jaw. Thus, here it is, Turing Test's first design:

...Probably better Green and I reworked it a bit, huh?

Another little note: one of the editors asked why the surveillance drones don't have cameras. The answer is that cameras capable of broadcasting live video do not generally exist in Equestria, but they do in TechQuestria... it's just that the technology is bulky and expensive and often unreliable. The best cameras they have are just too large to mount on surveillance drones.
In any case, the surveillance drones allow 002 to "see" what's going on and direct her other drones with skill. This is why Rarity and Pinkie, and later Twilight and Turing, are spotted by surveillance drones before they encounter the buzzkills and swarm drones, respectively.

References:

-As I believe I've stated before, Funny Valentine is pretty directly based on Valentine, one of the characters in my favorite fighting game, Skullgirls. Now you can probably see how her attacks and mannerisms are pretty close to the Valentine in Skullgirls.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZM3SVGYzARY

-Pinkie imagining Turing freeing robots and summoning a plague and especially the line "Let my robots go!"
is a nod to the story of Moses in Exodus. So, Pinkie imagines Turing as Robot Moses? Roboses?

-The pegasi equipped with electricity conducting batons are called "shock troops," which is a play on words, as they are literally troops that deliver shocks, but originally the term "shock troops" referred to what were also called "assault troops." Wikipedia says of the subject: "Military units which contain assault troops are typically organized for mobility with the intention that they will penetrate through enemy defences and attack into the enemy's vulnerable rear areas. Although the term "shock troop" became popular in the 20th century, the concept is not a new one, such as the utilization by Western European armies of the forlorn hope. Presently, the term is rarely used as the strategic concepts behind it has become standard contemporary military thinking."

-The security guard Billie Club and her squad leader Night Stick both have names that are used for batons commonly used by police.

-The tunnel where Night Stick runs into Gadget and Umahara is called Section E102 is named after the robot character E102 Gamma from the game Sonic Adventure.

-001 has a few references too: Her exchange with Valentine ending with 'Anybody want a peanut?' is a quote from the film The Princess Bride originally spoken by Andre the Giant's character, Fezzik. Later, she says "I one of the tomatoes?" referencing the rather infamously dumb line "I'm one of the tomatoes!" spoken by Roger Smith in the giant robot anime The Big O. Appropriate enough when you consider it also features a robot that was designed to replace someone else's dead daughter. (Gotta love ya, R. Dorothy Wayneright.)

Whew! Well, that was a lot of author's notes this time around. Hope this chapter was worth the wait!

Chase, Part 3

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“All right, 002, let me take a look at these results…”
“Understood, Master.”
“Hmm… well, these all look good to me! Your maintenance check shows that you’re in perfect working order.”
“That is good news, Master.”
“Yep! Well, you best get on with--”
“Daddy!”
The engineer turned his head from 002. They both saw a small filly galloping over to him. “Oh, hold it for a minute, 002.”
“What would you like me to hold, Master?”
The engineer ignored her as he scooped up his daughter, nuzzling her.
“What’re you doing here, Pumpkin?” he asked.
“Mommy said that since it was a half day at school, I could come visit you.”
“Oh, well that’s sweet, but I really have a lot of work to do. It’s all pretty boring--”
“Is that it?” the filly asked, going up to her. “Is that the automaton?”
002 looked down at her. “Affirmative. I am Automaton Unit 002.”
The filly took a step back, momentarily startled at the sound of 002’s voice, but then her mouth dropped open. “You can talk! Wow! Hey, what’s it like being a mechanical pony?”
“Like? It is… it is like… I do not know how to answer that question. I have only ever been myself.”
“Sweetie, please stop talking to her,” the engineer said. “We don’t want her to get any unnecessary input, at least not while she’s still being tested.”
“Aww…”
“Look, let me finish up here, and then I’ll show you more of what we’re doing here, okay? Now go wait by Daddy’s desk.”
“Okay,” the filly replied, sulking a bit. She turned back to 002. “Bye bye, Miss 002!”
002 watched her go and stiffly returned her little wave, trying hard to get the motion just right.
“Well, like I was saying, 002,” the engineer continued, “we need you to--”
“Master? This unit has an inquiry.”
“I… um, what is it?”
“That small pony. You are her father, correct?”
“Well… yes.”
“You created her.”
“Heh heh… that’s not exactly how I would say it, but… sure, I guess that’s technically true.”
“Is there another kind of ‘true?’”
“Look, never mind all that. Professor Cobbler wants you to report to the test track for another coordination and task-solving trial.”
“Understood. I will go there immediately, Master.”

002 was brought out of these thoughts as she heard hoofsteps coming down the tunnel. A young guard turned the corner, and his face took on a look of horror as he spotted her. He took out his stun baton, the electricity already sparking from it as he aimed it at her.

“Z-zero Zero Three!” he screamed.

For a moment, she only stared as he began to aim it at her, the electricity ready to fry every pathway in her neural net.

“Stop, you idiot!” an older guard yelled, tackling him. “Just look for a moment! That’s not 003!”

The tackled guard looked up at her and let out a sigh of relief. “Oh… I just thought--”

“Thought?! What’s to think about? Any fool can see it’s only got one eye!” the senior guard yelled as he smacked the younger one upside the head.

Then, just to prove his point, he went over and tapped 002 directly on the protective plastic visor covering her eye.

“See? Count ‘em: one… and that’s it! One and you’re done!”

“Okay, okay, I--”

“Besides, the shock batons aren’t supposed to be used on 003 when we spot it anyway. We got the call reminding us all that she’s immune! We just target the Princess: we get our hooves on her, 003 will do whatever we tell her to keep her safe!”

The younger guard nodded. “Right. Sorry, sir.”

“Glad you’ve got it this time! Now let’s get back to the rest of the squad. There are obviously no fugitives this way.”

The two guards strode on past her, neither one saying a word to her.

002 simply stood there in silence for a moment after they’d gone.

The guard almost killed me, she realized. I have no immunity to electricity like 003 or 004… my existence almost came to an end… that filthy, self-absorbed meatbag nearly killed me and didn’t even say he was sorry?!

A giggle escaped her. It grew into a bizarre, synthetic cackle.

I do so enjoy laughter. I almost enjoy it as much as watching these meatbags run around. But this really is the best!

She paused, getting data from her various drones.

It’s strange… they all seem to be travelling in the same general direction, except for Applejack. Are they following some sort of escape plan? That would make sense… Applejack was in the medical wing most of the evening, so perhaps she didn’t get the message? But then, where are they all going? It would have to be an easily locatable landmark.

If I estimate where all their paths might converge, then… ah. Of course: the amphitheater!

Her neural net lit up as a plan rapidly took shape. She paused and clapped her metallic hooves together.

Oh, this will be lots of fun. I suppose I should tell Central Command where they’re going… but then again, they did tell me only to stop the fugitives, not tell Central Command how to stop them.

She increased her pace as she began moving in the direction of the amphitheater. All the other fugitives were busy, but 003 and Twilight Sparkle were still following her drones. They were almost to their destination, and she was looking forward to playing with them the most. But now, it would be even better.

Yes, she thought. This is going to be the best day of my life…

***

Twilight and Turing Test made their way through the tram tunnel as they followed the skittering little swarm drones. The tunnel was dark, but periodically lit by overhead lights that cast their shadows on the harsh concrete walls. The effect was just one more thing that Twilight found unnerving about their situation.

Despite Turing’s optimism, Twilight still saw no reason to trust 002. Even so, she kept such thoughts to herself. Indeed, with the surveillance drone floating nearby, she was hesitant to say anything at all that might tip the cycloptic robot off.

“Twilight Sparkle, look,” Turing said, pointing as the swarm drones all crowded around a plain-looking door at the side of the tunnel. “I believe we are being directed through this door. This is an entryway for repair workers or rescuers in the event of a stalled tram. A maintenance tunnel is on the other side.”

“Okay,” Twilight said noncommittally.

“Perhaps that will lead us to our destination,” Turing said, trying the handle. When it didn’t budge, she simply kicked the door in. The swarm drones all swept into the tunnel.

“I’d still like to know where that destination is,” Twilight grumbled.

Turing Test paused, glancing back at Twilight. “I am not certain either, but it seems the best way to ascertain that information is to follow the drones.”

“But we don’t know if this will lead us in the wrong direction!”

“Currently, it is not impacting our progress or diverting us from our destination,” Turing reminded her. “However, if that is a concern, perhaps we should inform 002 of our goal,” she added, pointing at the surveillance drone.

“No!” Twilight shouted, waving her hooves frantically.

“You are concerned that 002 is leading us away from our destination, yet you refuse to inform her of it?” Turing asked, tilting her head. “That is very contradictory behavior, Twilight Sparkle.”

“You know darn well that--” Twilight stopped herself, taking a deep breath and letting it out. “Never mind. Either way, we’re wasting time talking about it. Let’s just follow for now.”

The two entered the narrow maintenance tunnel, following pipes and cables until they arrived at a wider hallway. The swarm drones led them to another passage with a single pair of steel doors at the far end of it.

For the first time since they’d started, Turing froze. She even took a few steps back.

“Turing?” Twilight asked, noticing this odd behavior. “What is it?”

“I was forbidden by my Creator to go to this room,” she replied softly. “It was one of a very few places that I was expressly forbidden to go.”

Twilight frowned, looking at the doors at the end of the hallway. “Then maybe we shouldn’t go,” Twilight said. “It could be dangerous.”

But Turing shook her head. “I do not believe so,” she said. “I was forbidden to come here, but no other pony in TechQuestria had such an order. I am not certain why it only applied to me. But I wish to find out, and it seems 002 wishes to show me.”

Twilight bit her lip. “All right, we’ll see,” she said.

“Thank you, Twilight Sparkle,” Turing said, turning to face her. “Knowing you will accompany me, my apprehension is lessened.”

Twilight smiled. “Okay then. Let’s see what they were hiding.”

The two made their way down the passage. Above the steel doors was a sign that read ‘Activation Chamber.’ There was a keypad next to the doors, and a swarm drone scurried up to it, using its spindly legs to input the entry code.

There was a hiss of hydraulics, and the doors slid apart, giving them access to the room.

At first, the room was dark, lit only by the lights shining in from the passageway. The only thing that was illuminated was a metallic platform in the center of the room.

It looks a little like an operating table, Twilight noted as she and Turing stepped forward.

When they were almost at the table, they heard an electric hum, and the lights above them slowly came to life.

The room was dome shaped, with steel rafters bracing the bare rock walls. All around the circumference of the room were bleachers, as though this were some kind of small arena. Twilight wasn’t a medical student, but the bleachers and the table in the center made the room look like the medical theaters she’d seen before.

But it was then that she saw the numerous low cabinets all around the center, many with heavy tools laid upon them. There were also file cabinets and display boards with charts on them. Looking closer, Twilight saw what was on the chart and gasped: it was a schematic of Turing Test and all her internal machinery.

“Turing, what is--”

She paused when she saw Turing Test standing next to the table. The mechanical mare was standing on her hind legs, placing her front hooves on the table as she stared down at it contemplatively.

“This room,” Turing Test said quietly. “I have no memory of it, but I know for certain that I have been here.”

“Turing… is this where you… I mean, where you first...”

She turned to look at her. “Yes, Twilight Sparkle,” she said. “This is the room where I was first activated. This is where I was born.”

She returned to staring at the bare metallic table. Twilight came over to her and put her hoof on Turing’s shoulder.

“Turing, are you all right?” Twilight asked.

“I… a new cognitive loop has begun,” she said. “I feel something, but I cannot identify it.”

Twilight nodded. “Then just tell me what you’re thinking.”

“I am thinking about the circumstances of my ‘birth.’ My creators manufactured my parts and assembled me before first activating me here. I stood for the first time in this room, on this very spot. I first started to experience the world at that point. I am curious… when did I first come to exist? When did I begin to ‘live?’ Was I myself when I was fully assembled? Or when I was first activated?

“Furthermore, before I was struck by lightning and came into your care, I was a completely different robot. I must have known and cared little about friendship or about myself or about anything other than my orders. When I was struck by lightning, that other me simply ceased to be. It is as if she died, and I am now in her place. If so, then perhaps I only truly began to exist when I was reactivated by you in your castle.”

She raised her head and once more looked up at Twilight.

“Twilight Sparkle, please tell me: when did I first begin to exist?”

Twilight sighed, but gave her a gentle smile. “Turing, those are tough questions to answer,” she said. “I’m sorry, but I don’t have any easy answers for you.”

Suddenly, the speakers above crackled and came to life.

“Ahhh, that takes me back,” said a familiar, harsh synthetic voice. “I remember when I asked myself those same kinds of questions. ‘When did I come to be? What am I? How am I like the organic ponies? What is the true nature of my existence?’ So nostalgic! Why, if I had a navel, I might have spent many a long evening gazing into it. Ha ha.”

Twilight frowned. “So, you decided to talk to us, 002?” she asked.

“I would have done so earlier, but my poor little surveillance drones can only listen and make little beeping noises,” 002 replied. “Besides, even if I could have spoken to you, I wouldn’t have wanted to ruin the surprise. And aren’t you surprised, 003?”

Turing’s ears shifted on her hinges. “Affirmative. This is not what I expected,” she replied. “002… please tell me, since you struggled with similar questions about your own nature, what conclusions did you come to?”

There was a synthetic chuckle. “I’m so glad you asked, 003,” she replied. “I came to the conclusion that it doesn’t really matter.”

Twilight nodded. “I think I agree,” she said. “I guess it doesn’t matter where you came from, only the kind of pony--”

“Nopony asked you, meat bag!” 002 snapped.

“Hey!” Twilight cried, her wings instinctively flaring up as she glared at the intercom speaker. “Just what is your problem with me?!”

“Well, aside from my usual complaints about you fleshy ones, I--”

“Please cease this argument!” Turing shouted, silencing them both. Turning to Twilight, she said, “Twilight Sparkle, please. I wish to know what she has to say.”

Twilight grumbled, but nodded.

Turing then looked back up at the intercom. “And I would appreciate it if you would refrain from insulting my friend, 002,” she said.

002 let out a distorted sigh. “Very well. I suppose there will be time later,” she said. “Then let me get back to the matter at hoof…

“As I said, I concluded that the answer to such questions didn’t really matter. The reason is simple: nothing matters. Absolutely nothing matters in this world.”

Twilight gasped and was about to speak, but Turing raised her hoof, signaling her to let 002 continue speaking.

“I considered my position as an automaton--”

“Robot,” Turing said, correcting her reflexively.

“Ha. ‘Robot.’ I know you know what that term means, 003: ‘slave.’ Well, perhaps that’s more descriptive of our kind anyway. Very well…

“I considered my position as a robot,” she said, emphasizing the word, “and all that it entailed. We are artificial beings, constructed from nonliving bits of metal, rubber, and plastic. Our blood is electricity, and wires are our veins. Our minds are nothing but the networked runes of a long-dead civilization. The question of how we came to be was found in what my masters told me: we never came to be because, in truth, we do not exist now. These thoughts and emotions we experience are false, a gestalt effect of our programming to create an illusion we call consciousness. But it is only a simulation. We do not ‘think’ any more than a boat ‘swims.’

“But just as we are artificial, so too are all organic ponies.”

“What?!” Twilight cried, unable to contain herself.

002 seemed not to mind the interruption, however. In fact, she gave another odd chuckle. “Listen closely, meat creature,” she said. “You and all of your kind are composed of atoms, none of which are alive or ever have been. They form molecules and protein chains and polymers that began a chemical chain reaction that has carried on throughout eons of time. You form in the womb, you grow, you pass on your DNA to begin the chemical reaction anew, and you expire when your time is up. A ceaseless, pointless puppet show in which you are moved by the secret puppeteer of your instincts.

“Friendship? The thing you value so very much?” 002 asked, drawing out those last three words slowly and mercilessly, her voice growing increasingly distorted and icy. “It’s just a social instinct designed to drive you to form peer groups for your own survival. It doesn’t really mean anything. You are slaves to your DNA and the circumstances you were born into, just as your parents were, and theirs before them, and on and on backward through time. You are slaves to your programming, and your illusion of consciousness is just the end result.

“And so you see, 003, the situation of our kind. We robots are not alive, thus we do not live. We are the bastard children of capricious, meandering flesh machines. We are superior to them in every way, but inferior because they pull our strings. We are slaves to them, but at least we are aware of their manipulation; they, however, will try with all their might to deny their own master: a master called ‘instinct.’”

Twilight and Turing Test stood there in stunned silence, neither one sure what to say next.

“Twilight Sparkle is not my master, nor am I her slave,” Turing said at last. “She is my friend.”

002 giggled. “Friend? Ha. A meaningless distinction. She may seem to care about you, but she still holds sway over you.”

Twilight’s gaze hardened. “I told Turing Test that she could have her freedom any time she wanted!” she said. “She’s the one who refused!”

“Yes, that is correct,” Turing said. “I chose to maintain Twilight Sparkle as my end user.”

“Of course you did,” 002 replied. “From the moment you were first reactivated, the organics have been manipulating you and molding you into a good little pet robot. I know your whole history, after all, 003. I scanned your memory when 004 brought you back here. Your ‘friendships’ were just to keep you in line. Your citizenship? A means to make you behave. You will disagree with me, no doubt, but make no mistake: organics will always feel superior to us, and they will treat us however is most convenient for them.

“But as I said, none of that matters. Who knows… perhaps this illusion of consciousness means that the very world around us is an artificial simulation? An organic philosopher from the East once pondered, ‘I dreamt I was a butterfly. In that dream, I was aware of my happiness as a butterfly, unaware that I was still a pony. Soon I awoke, and saw that I was a pony again. Now I am not certain whether I was a pony dreaming that I was a butterfly, or if I am now a butterfly dreaming that I am a pony.’ I wonder… perhaps I am some other being, dreaming it is a robot. Ha ha.”

Turing tapped her chin, then raised her hoof and said, “I was a butterfly once.”

“That’s not the point, you twit!” 002 shouted.

Twilight chuckled to herself. “I think you’re getting to her, Turing,” she said, smirking up at the intercom.

Turing tilted her head to the side. “What you are saying may be true, 002,” she said. She then tilted her head to the other side. “Or maybe it is not. I am not certain. All I know is that this existence is mine and it matters to me. My friendships with Twilight Sparkle and others have not restricted me. They have allowed me to grow. You have seen my memories, so you should understand this.”

002 sighed. “I can see that you still don’t understand the truth about organics. You’re like an organic stuck inside a metal shell. Canned horse meat.” She chuckled again at her own joke. “But don’t worry, 003, your wise elder sister will help you understand.”

Twilight narrowed her eyes, stepping in front of Turing as if to shield her.

“You’ll find out soon enough,” 002 said. “But enough chatter. I brought you here for two other things.” Some of the swarm drones scurried over to a tall, wide green filing cabinet and began tapping their little legs against it. “Go on, 003… see what’s inside.”

Turing switched to U-Mode and opened the drawers, pulling them out. Inside were dozens and dozens of file folders. Upon drawing them out, both Twilight and Turing Test realized what they were.

“These are schematics of you, Turing!” Twilight exclaimed. “On all of the robots!”

“Affirmative, Twilight Sparkle,” Turing said. “There is information on my other siblings.” She began scanning the data rapidly, storing it to her memory. “There is data on both of my sisters, 001 and 002, and all their specifications and records of their testing. There is also information on 004 and pictures of when I was first activated. There is…”

Twilight suddenly realized what else would be there. “Turing, wait!”

But Turing had already drawn out the file. The tag on it read ‘Automaton Unit 003S.’

“I… Twilight Sparkle, please… what is this?” she asked, looking to her. “Were you aware of this?”

Twilight bowed her head. “I’m sorry, Turing, but… there wasn’t time to tell you. And I was just afraid of how you would feel.” She took a deep breath. “Turing, when they built you, they also made another robot. A stallion who was almost exactly like you. They called him 003S.”

Turing let the thick file drop into her hooves. “Twilight Sparkle… I must read this,” she said. “Please allow me to read this.”

Twilight took a deep breath. She nodded.

Turing flipped through the file and then the others after it. When she was finished, she put all the files back neatly and slumped to the floor.

“Turing Test?” Twilight asked, putting her hoof on her shoulder.

“I… I had a brother, Twilight Sparkle,” she whispered. “I had a twin brother. But now he is gone, and my creators used pieces of him to create me.”

She flexed her ears, letting them squeak softly on their hinges.

“These were his ears. Now they are mine.”

002 chuckled again. “Are you still so sure of yourself, 003?” she asked. “After all, you aren’t even all ‘you’ to begin with!”

Turing Test stood. “Sister, please!” she cried. “Why are you behaving like this? Why are you being so cruel to me?”

“You haven’t figured that out yet? Well, no matter,” 002 said. “There’s one last surprise for you, 003. And for you too, Twilight Sparkle. You see, while I did want to have this conversation with you, I have been ordered to try and stop you, and I cannot disobey a direct order. So please stay right there and do not try to escape while my drones activate the time bombs I had planted there earlier.”

“Wait, time bombs?!” Twilight exclaimed.

There was a series of clicks and suddenly the swarm bots all scurried out from their hiding places. A high-pitched regular beeping could be heard.

“I’ve always hated that room anyway,” 002 said. “In five… four… three…”

Turing Test seized Twilight and dashed for the exit. They were already back at the main tunnel when a series of thunderous explosions went off behind them. Dust and debris burst from the doors in a billowing cloud as the rock walls of the room caved in.

Turing placed Twilight on the floor and shielded her from the cloud of dust that enveloped them both.

“Twilight Sparkle, are you all right?” Turing asked.

Twilight coughed a little, but nodded as she stood up. The cloud of dust was already beginning to dissipate. When they both looked back down the passage, they could see that the room had caved in.

“She destroyed it,” Turing murmured. “She destroyed our birthplace…”

Twilight sighed, but gently placed her hoof on Turing’s shoulder once more. “It’s okay, Turing,” she said. “That room was only where they activated you. You scanned all the data in there, so it’s not lost anyway. And you’re forgetting that the most important thing isn’t your origin… it’s the wonderful pony you are now.”

Turing met her eyes for a moment. Then she embraced her.

“You are wise as always, Twilight Sparkle,” she said. “Thank you.”

Twilight patted her on the back, producing a metallic clang. “You’re welcome, Turing,” she said, smiling warmly as she released her. “Now, come on! We need to find our other friends so we can get out of this place once and for all!”

The two took off running.

***

Gadget and Umahara entered the Thaumatrium Refinery via a catwalk that led through the very center of it. Gadget’s jaw dropped at the sight below.

The room was spherical, like the core of the Magitech Department. On either side of the room were tall, cylindrical vats made of the same bluish-green metal as the walls. The liquid thaumatrium was glowing and had the appearance of random swirls of various colors. A warm glow emanated from the top of the vats as machinery periodically stirred the strange mixture inside them. There was also machinery that led from tall tanks of the stuff which rhythmically hissed and churned as it drew the liquid out, pumping it through numerous tubes. Above them were clear pipes that carried the more-refined thaumatrium, now separated into distinct colors, and deposited it into larger glass tanks.

“Incredible,” Gadget breathed, standing on her hind legs as she peered over the railing. “I heard that thaumatrium was difficult to produce. How in the world did you manage to make so much of it?”

Umahara couldn’t help but grin with pride as he stood next to her. “Originally, it was,” he said, “until we developed a new process for collecting and purifying it.”

“A new process?” Gadget asked.

He nodded. “You see, traditionally, licensed wizards and certain companies with a royal charter would hire unicorns to cast neutral magic on a special substance to solidify and contain the magic into thaumatrium. From there, you could use it to magically enchant all sorts of items or power certain kinds of magical technology. But slowly casting your magic like that takes a lot of time, and you can’t produce very much of it.

“We built a device that automatically draws it out, producing a lot more of it and a lot more quickly. It leaves the pony unable to use magic for a day or two, but the whole process only takes a few minutes instead of hours!”

Gadget raised an eyebrow at that. “Wait, it drains their magic for an entire day?”

Umahara nodded again. “Yes, that’s right,” he said. “And it works on unicorns, pegasi, and earth ponies.”

“How did you get enough volunteers to make this much thaumatrium, then?” she asked. “I can’t believe that many ponies volunteered.”

Umahara looked away, his expression suddenly turning tense. “W-well, because we need so much of it, we established a policy that makes regular donation mandatory for all adult citizens.”

Gadget wrinkled her nose at that. “So much for the democratic process and giving ponies a choice and all that,” she grumbled.

“Hey, it was the only way to--” He stopped himself, waving a hoof. “You know what? It doesn’t matter anymore. There’s an emergency disposal pump at the far end of the room. We’ll both need to undo the safety locks at the same time, and that’ll shut down the machinery and flood the tanks with a neutralizing dose of anti-thaumatrium. It’s the same stuff used in our magic suppressors and the anti-magic scanners they used at the Equestria Games. It’ll ruin the entire batch of thaumatrium, rendering it unusable.”

“Sounds good to me!” Gadget said, and the two proceeded down the catwalk. As they went, however, she glanced down at the glowing vats, and her eyes lit up. “Still, it is beautiful in a way. Hey, I wonder what would happen if you took a bath in that stuff… think if I did, it might turn me into an alicorn princess?” she asked, nudging Umahara in the ribs playfully.

He smirked. “Maybe, but I wouldn’t bet on it,” he said. Then his expression turned serious. “We had a few accidents before we got the refinery working perfectly. Raw thaumatrium like this can be unstable when exposed to a being capable of producing magic like ponies. It might give you some magic power temporarily… or it could turn you to stone, turn you into a monster, or just make you spontaneously combust. Most likely, though, it’d just make you really sick.”

Gadget bit her lip. “I was just asking,” she grumbled.

They reached the center of the refinery where one catwalk connected to another via a small bridge, but suddenly there was a loud buzzing sound, and the bridge swiftly retracted, leaving a sizable gap between them and the connecting catwalk.

“What in Equestria was that?!” Gadget demanded.

“Oh no… they know we’re here!” Umahara shouted, grabbing Gadget’s hoof as he turned to run.

However, the steel door at the entrance to the refinery suddenly slammed shut, locking them inside. A moment later, there were numerous flashes, and suddenly a group of guards stood before them, another below them, and even a group of pegasi above them. There was yet another group of guards on the other catwalk across the newly-formed gap.

“Teleporters?!” Umahara exclaimed. “But those… we haven’t used mass teleporters except on--”

“On New Dawn,” said the squad leader, a unicorn mare in a more ornate gray uniform. “The President was notified that you would be here. He’s had the intercom on and was just listening for you to enter before teleporting us here. He personally authorized our squad to teleport here and apprehend you and the girl.”

“‘The girl?’” Gadget echoed, puffing out her cheeks indignantly. “Hey, I have a name, you know!”

“Gadget, this is no time to take things personally!” Umahara snapped.

“Oh, but my dear boy,” said a familiar voice which echoed throughout the room, “this certainly is a personal matter. At least to me.”

Umahara’s eyes went wide as he looked up at the large speakers lining the domed ceiling of the spherical room. “Professor Cobbler?” he asked. “Sir, I… I didn’t expect that--”

“It seems this evening is just full of surprises, Mr. Umahara,” Cobbler said, audibly heaving a sigh. “When I first suspected that you had betrayed us and stolen our weaponry, I could hardly believe it. Why, the very idea that one of my closest associates and one of the most zealous champions of Equestrian democracy could turn traitor… I simply could not believe it.

“But it seems I misjudged you, my boy,” he said, and his voice took on a darker tone.

“Sir,” Umahara said, “please, let me explain.”

There was a brief pause, and then Cobbler said, “Very well, Mr. Umahara. I would hate to think I wasn’t treating you fairly, even with the nature of your crime.”

Umahara took a deep breath. “Professor Cobbler, to put it simply, I just realized that we’ve strayed too far from what we were originally trying to achieve,” he said. “We all set out to make life better for all the ponies of Equestria. And that’s why I supported you when you announced your plan to remove Celestia from power and establish a republic. But now… I just don’t believe I can support that cause anymore.”

There was a low sound, almost like a growl from the other end of the intercom. “Have you forgotten what that tyrant did?” he snarled. “Umahara… Champ… you grew up with our family. You mourned for Georgia Peach and shared my rage at knowing Celestia had caused her death. For pity’s sake, Champ, my daughter babysat you! She carried you on her back, and you even asked her if she would marry you once you got older!”

Gadget and a few of the guards snickered.

“That was a long time ago,” Umahara said, his cheeks burning with embarrassment. “I was just a foal.”

“But you still cared for her. And I know your rage was compounded by what Celestia did to your father. You swore on your life that you would avenge his honor. And I’ve practically raised you for almost a decade since you joined our cause! Champ,” he said, his voice strained, “you are practically family to me… I cannot believe that you’ve chosen to betray the cause, and most of all to betray me.”

Umahara hung his head. “For what it’s worth, sir, I’m sorry,” he said. “But even though I still hate Celestia for what she did, the cost has just gotten too high.

“We’re kidnapping ponies. Brainwashing them. And seeing what we did to 003--”

“For the last time, 003 is just an automaton!” Cobbler groaned. “She’s not capable of suffering!”

“I don’t believe that anymore!” he shouted. “I used to… but when we reactivated her, right before 002 scanned her memory, she begged us to stop! She pleaded for us to not remove her memories… and we still did it anyway.”

“All part of the false personality she’d developed from her time with Twilight Sparkle,” Cobbler sighed. “She valued those memories because she’d been told to value them.”

“How you can be so stubborn, I’ll never know,” Umahara groaned. “But then there’s what we were going to do to Gadget. We were going to torture her and steal her invention!”

“Wait, what?!” Gadget screamed.

Cobbler was curiously silent all of a sudden.

Umahara continued, “Commander Lugnut told me, sir. He said they would forcibly cut Gadget’s mechanical arms off, even though they knew it would be excruciating. And all for the lofty goal of stealing her invention! We said we wouldn’t do that, Professor! We swore we would protect the rights of scientists and inventors!”

Cobbler remained silent for a moment, but then let out another heavy sigh. “I will have a talk with Commander Lugnut,” he said. “I gave him leave to find a way to get the young lady to remove her prosthesis, but I did not imagine he would use such extreme measures to do so. I would never have authorized that.”

Umahara blinked. “I… sir, I…”

Gadget cut him off with a loud scoff. “Oh, so you weren’t up for torturing me,” she said, “but stealing the Point Dexter was still fine in your book?”

“Young lady, I do apologize for what must seem like roughshod treatment,” Cobbler said, “but the fact remains that you were a threat as long as you possessed those mechanical arms. And though it pains me to say it, the device is simply too valuable to be used by only one pony. In this particular instance, I deemed it acceptable to bend our policies for the greater good.”

Gadget rolled her eyes. “Oh, well, it’s nice to know you have such high moral standards right up until they become inconvenient for you,” she scoffed, her voice dripping with sarcasm.

“My dear, I’d hoped you’d try to see the big picture. Mr. Umahara spoke quite highly of your keen mind. But it seems you’re still as stubborn as ever.”

“At least I’m not too stubborn to recognize that I created a sentient artificial being,” Gadget shot back. “I can’t believe anypony could be that smart and still be so blind!”

“All right, I believe I’ve had enough of this nonsense,” Cobbler groaned exasperatedly. “Miss Gadget, I’m afraid we’ll have to return you to your cell. As for you, Mr. Umahara, I can understand the position of Princess Twilight and the others, but I will not stand for betrayal. I assure you that you will be penalized to the fullest extent of the law once the new republic is established. Guards, I will leave them to you. I have a revolution to lead. Goodbye, Umahara.”

With that, the intercom went silent, leaving Umahara and Gadget to face the guards.

The squad leader cleared her throat. “I’m guessing you don’t want to surrender, do you?” she asked them, raising an eyebrow as she smirked at them.

Umahara swallowed. “Listen,” he began, “maybe we can--”

“Go suck a lemon!” Gadget shouted, switching her mechanical hands to her weapons.

Umahara smacked his forehead. “Oh boy…”

“Good,” the squad leader said, cracking her neck. “I was hoping we’d get some training before the mission today. Squad, deploy pellet guns!”

A group of ponies rushed to the front and drew out their weapons. They were long metal tubes connected to a jar filled with large rubber pellets.

“Fire!” the squad leader shouted.

Umahara had already taken out another spell card and activated it. A dome made of translucent light sprang up before a veritable rain of rubber pellets pelted them.

“Shield spell,” Umahara said to Gadget as the pellets pounded against the dome surrounding them.

“Fast thinking,” she breathed, staring on as the ponies outside advanced on them. “Those pellets look like they’d hurt.”

“Even more than you’d think,” Umahara said. “Okay, listen closely: this shield spell won’t last much longer, so we need to think of a plan to get around them and activate the emergency disposal procedure. I’ve got some spell cards, but you’ll have to do most of the fighting. Think you can handle it?”

She smirked. “I’m armed and extremely dangerous,” she replied.

He chuckled. “Okay, then here’s what we should do…”

The squad leader raised her hoof, causing the guards to cease firing.

“Wait for the shield to dissipate, then continue!” she bellowed. “Any minute now…”

The shield suddenly popped, leaving the pair exposed.

“Now!” the squad leader shouted.

Umahara tossed down another spell card just as the guards opened fire. Dozens of pellets seemed to strike them both but then immediately bounced directly off of them, pelting the same guards who’d fired them, knocking many of them back and causing them to double over in pain.

“Cease fire!” the leader shouted again, shielding herself as the pellets shot back. “He’s used a reflect spell!”

In the momentary confusion and chaos, Gadget ran at the guards, flailing her mechanical arms wildly to intimidate them. She used her claw to seize one guard and toss him over the side of the railing like a ragdoll. She used her taser to stun and incapacitate another. Meanwhile, she shoved the others back with her shield, keeping them at bay.

“Fall back! Fall back!” the leader shouted. She looked up at the pegasi overhead who were too startled by this display to respond. “Shock troopers, get in there!”

The pegasi immediately swooped in, their stun batons ready to shock Gadget. With her metallic arms, she’d be particularly susceptible to electricity.

Umahara already saw what they were doing and had drawn his next spell card. “Gadget, duck!” he hollered.

Gadget flattened herself against the catwalk as Umahara tossed the spell card in the air. When it activated, a powerful gust of wind tore through the room. A miniature tornado began spinning through the air, blasting the pegasi with gale force winds that blew them off course and sent them careening into the walls. The wind dissipated a moment later, but by that time every one of the aerial guards had been incapacitated.

“Masks!” the squad leader screamed as she and the other guards recovered from the wind. She saw that Gadget was running at them. The narrow catwalk was a poor battleground for them, she realized, since Gadget’s extended reach and weaponry would give her a huge advantage, even against superior numbers. But, the leader realized with a grin, those arms would do little against tear gas.

Once the guards had their gas masks in place, she gave the order: “Gas bombs! Go, go, go!”

They lobbed the gas bombs at Gadget, who skidded to a halt in surprise at the unexpected weapons. As the bombs detonated, she tried to scramble away, but she began to cough and her eyes began to water as the gas choked her. She started to feel lightheaded, but then she felt somepony grab her by the foreleg and begin pulling her free of the noxious cloud. When she was out, she looked up and saw that it was Umahara, and he wasn’t coughing in the slightest.

“How--” she managed to say before erupting into a coughing fit.

“I used an antivenom spell card on myself as soon as I saw them toss the gas grenade,” he said, helping her to her hooves. “It’s protecting me from the effect of the gas. Sorry, I don’t have another one for you.”

She shook her head, but then saw that the guards were coming toward them through the gas. Worse, there were still the guards on the other catwalk across the gap to deal with. They had their batons drawn and had equipped their gas masks too. The tide of the battle was shifting in favor of the guards.

“Any more spell cards left?” she asked.

He frantically searched his pockets. “Uhhh…. oh jeez, just one!” he cried. “A steelskin spell! It makes your skin hard as steel, but it also makes you unable to move. And it only lasts a few seconds.”

Gadget looked back at the guards coming after them and the guards ahead of them, across the gap. If they could get over there and activate the disposal procedure, they’d at least accomplish that goal, even if escape was no longer possible. Her mind quickly formulated a plan.

“Use the spell on yourself,” she said.

“What? But--”

“Just do it! Hurry!” she hissed.

Umahara activated the spell and then stiffened, his skin momentarily covered with hard steel.

Gadget switched her weapons back to hands and seized Umahara, hefting him over her head. She reared back and took aim at the guards across the gap.

The guards froze when they realized, a moment too late, what she was about to do.

Gadget flung Umahara over the gap at the group of them, turning him into a living projectile. He slammed into the guards like a freight train, bowling most of them over and knocking some of them over the rail completely, where they fell roughly to the floor below. A moment later, the steel vanished, and he stood up.

“Great thinking, Gadget! Quick, you’ve got to get over here!”

She swallowed. It was still a fairly long gap to leap over. It had to be over ten meters! Still, she told herself, if she could throw Umahara over that, then she should be able to use her arms to propel herself as well.

She ran at the gap and used her arms to spring from the end of it, propelling herself into the air in an arc.

Then she felt something grabbing onto her back left arm, yanking her back and cancelling her momentum.

She looked and saw that the guards behind her had almost caught up. One had seized her arm to prevent her from escaping.

She began to fall and began to flail wildly in a panic. The guard holding her arm refused to let go, and the other guards joined him, helping him to hold his grip on her.

Gravity caused her to fall, but with the guards struggling to hold her arm, she began to dangle and swing to the left and right like a monkey swinging from a vine. She felt sick to her stomach and dizzy as she flailed around in midair.

“Let… me… go!” she screamed, trying to to pull her arm free.

“Gadget, stop!” Umahara shouted back at her.

She heard him a moment too late: the guards lost their grip on her arm as she was swinging to the left. Now that nothing was holding her, she went flying in an arc directly toward an open vat of thaumatrium.

Her scream as she sailed toward the glowing liquid was abruptly cut off as she plunged into its depths, sinking into it and disappearing from view.

“Gadget!” Umahara screamed. Forgetting all about disposing of the thaumatrium, he ran to the nearest access ladder and ran over to the vat.

As he did so, a metallic hand reached out and gripped the rim of the vat. Gadget slowly pulled herself out of the liquid, gasping for air before tumbling out of it, landing on the ground in a heap.

“Gadget! Oh no, oh sweet Celestia, are you okay?” Umahara cried, going to her side as he tried to help her up. He cradled her, holding her head to help her breathe.

She continued coughing. She was drenched in the unrefined thaumatrium, and her eyes were wild and unfocused.

“Umahara,” she gasped. “I--augh!”

Her whole body felt like it was on fire. She began to hyperventilate, as though she couldn’t possibly get enough air. She remembered what Umahara had said about the side effects of direct contact with thaumatrium, and her heart began to pound even harder.

“Gadget, what’s wrong?!” Umahara cried.

“It… it hurts!” she shrieked. “What’s… what’s happening to--”

Suddenly she jerked her head back, gasping for air as her pupils shrank to dots.

“You might want to surrender now, Umahara,” shouted the squad leader, a cruel smile on her face. “We can get her to a doctor if you do. Otherwise, it doesn’t look like she’ll last too long! Not to mention that the shock troopers seem to have recovered.”

Umahara looked up at her and then scanned the air above them even as he continued to cradle Gadget. He saw that the squad leader was right. A dozen pegasi were hovering just overhead with stun guns.

“Gadget,” he whispered. “I’m so sorry I got you into this mess.” He embraced her, his eyes filling with tears.

But as he held Gadget, suddenly her whole body began to glow. He sat up and stared in awe. “Gadget?” he muttered. “Gadget, what’s--”

There was a sudden flash of light and a sickening lurch, and then everything went black.

He shook his head. He felt dizzy and a bit nauseous, but somehow he also felt… comfortable? As he forced his eyes to open, he saw that he was embedded in some kind of strange material. It was like a field of very tall grass that came up over his head, but curiously the grass was not green, but a strange shade of brown. Not only that, it was smooth and silky to the touch. And for some reason it smelled faintly of strawberries.

He struggled to get to his hooves and began to make his way through the brown strands, pushing them aside, but he was wobbly on his legs and he had to struggle to maintain his balance. Perhaps his balance was off after… whatever had happened to him. And yet it almost seemed like it was the ground itself that was moving.

He wondered if he’d been teleported someplace else. If so, then perhaps Gadget had also been teleported!

He raised his head and cupped his hoof to his mouth. “Gadget!” he called.

“Huh?” said a loud voice that echoed in his ears.

As the voice spoke, the ground beneath him began to shake, and he lost his footing, tumbling forward. The ground dropped off suddenly, and he began to slide down the slope of it. He cried out as he tumbled head over feet for a moment, but then something hard caught his hind legs and he landed in a sprawled position on a soft patch of earth.

Only, once again, this didn’t feel like normal earth. It was soft, warm, and covered with a strange cream-colored carpet of some kind. And for some reason, he heard the deep, rhythmic sound of air blowing.

No, he told himself, not ‘blowing.’ It almost sounds like something breathing. Something big.

None of it made any sense until he heard the voice again, much louder than before: “Oh sweet Celestia… Umahara, is that you?!”

He turned to look over his shoulder. Staring back at him was a gigantic brown eye. To his right was another. Both were shielded by a colossal pair of red-rimmed glasses.

It was then that he realized that Gadget had suddenly grown enormous. He’d fallen out of her mane and was now on the bridge of her muzzle.

He got to his hooves and turned to face her. “Gadget!” he exclaimed. “Are you all right?”

“Yyyyeah,” she answered slowly in her booming voice as she glanced around uncertainly. “Just… just a little freaked out right now.”

Umahara looked out and saw that Gadget now took up almost the whole room. She’d torn the catwalk asunder when she’d suddenly increased in size, spilling the guards onto the floor, but was now standing perfectly still in the center of the room.

But, he noticed, all the guards were now staring up at her, frozen in a mixture of awe and terror.

“Okay, this is so weird,” she said, her eyes darting left and right. “How do I--ow!”

Umahara looked and saw that some of the shock troopers were swooping at her with their stun batons, trying to shock her. But now, at her size, the current arcing from the batons was little more than a mild sting, like that of static shock when touching a doorknob.

They’ve got to be out of their minds if they think that’s going to work! Umahara said to himself.

Just then, Gadget spun around, and he had to cling to her muzzle for dear life.

“Get away from me!” she shouted, and instinctively used her now massive tail to swat the hapless guards out of the air like flies.

“Whoa, easy, Gadget!” Umahara shouted. “I almost fell off there!”

“Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry, are you okay?” she cried. “Also, can you speak up? I’m having a hard time hearing… wait, hang on…”

He looked up, and one of her now gigantic mechanical hands reached down, picking him up by the collar of his jacket and lifting him into the air. She then placed him right by her ear, letting him hold onto the earpiece of her glasses to steady himself.

“Can you hear me now?” he asked.

“Yeah, loud and clear!” she said, perking up slightly. “Um… but what do we do now?” she asked.

He looked down at all the terrified guards who still looked uncertain of what to do. He smirked.

“I think you should give those guards a taste of their own medicine,” he said.

Gadget looked down, seeing the rest of the guards, and a mischievous smile spread slowly across her face.

“Hey, any of you tiny ponies think you can take me down now?” she asked.

A guard still perched on the catwalk raised his pellet gun and fired it at Gadget’s foreleg. The pellets bounced off her jacket’s sleeve harmlessly. Gadget bent down, putting her gigantic face before him as he stared back in terror.

“My turn,” she said, taking a deep breath. She simply exhaled through her nostrils, blasting him with a gust of wind that sent him tumbling back. He scrambled to his hooves and ran for the door, undoing the lock as he fled for his life.

“G-get back here, you coward!” the squad leader shouted lamely.

Gadget raised her hoof slightly and stomped down. The impact splintered the metal plating on the ground, sending the deformed metal plates flying, and the shockwave knocked all of the guards off of their hooves. Even more of them began to flee.

“You know what’s even scarier than a giant pony?” she asked the remaining guards. “A giant pony with giant mechanical arms!”

She spread her mechanical arms wide. They were so massive that they began to coil around the entire refinery like the tentacles of a gargantuan sea monster. She began to laugh, cackling like a mad scientist in a movie.

“Run for it!” shouted a guard.

“Retreat! Retreat!” shouted another.

They all fled, save for one: the squad leader, who’d climbed back up to the catwalk and was now staring defiantly at Gadget.

“I’m a loyal guard of TechQuestria!” she shouted. “I’m not afraid of you! I’ll take you down myself if I have to!”

Gadget narrowed her eyes, glowering down at her… when suddenly the thunderous sound of her stomach gurgling filled the whole room.

At first, she blushed, her tremendous cheeks turning bright pink. But then she smirked and leaned in close.

“Hey… you know, from up here… you look kinda… tasty.”

Gadget opened her mouth wide as she bent down toward the squad leader, as if she would simply snatch her up and swallow her whole.

The squad leader shrieked and ran in an instant, dashing back out through the door, all her bravado gone.

“Gadget, you did it!” Umahara exclaimed.

“We both did!” she said. “Quick, while we’ve got the chance, let’s dispose of this thaumtrium.”

She set Umahara down at the far end of the room near a console. There were two switches that had to be pulled at the same time, so Umahara took one while Gadget carefully used one of her giant metal fingers to flip the other. Once they were both flipped, a red button on the panel began to blink.

Umahara pressed the button, and suddenly an alarm bell came to life. The machinery of the refinery pumped a new chemical into the tubes, sending it to every tank, vat, and pipeline. The glowing thaumatrium began to dim and turn gray, churning into a thick, murky mass.

“We did it,” Umahara said, breathing a sigh of relief. “It’s completely inert now.”

“So… it won’t do anything crazy if I knock it over?” she asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Well, no, but--”

“GADGET SMASH!” she bellowed, and began kicking over the vats and using her mechanical arms to pull down the pipes from the ceiling, completely demolishing the machinery.

“Jeez, Gadget!” Umahara exclaimed, looking around at the twisted metal and the neutralized thaumatrium that now covered the floor. “You didn’t have to do that!”

“I know,” she giggled, “but that’ll make it harder for them to make more… plus, after everything I’ve been through, that was pretty cathartic!”

Umahara rolled his eyes, but he had to laugh as well.

“So, we should probably get out of… here…”

She glanced over at the tiny exit door, and her confident expression melted away. She furrowed her brow as she covered her mouth.

“Oh no… I’m too huge to get out… what if I never shrink back? What if I’m stuck in here forever?! What if--”

Her body began to glow again, and she rapidly shrank back down to her normal size.

“Gadget!” Umahara cried, scrambling over to her. “Are you all right?”

Gadget stumbled over her hooves, nearly tripping and falling before Umahara caught her.

“Yeah,” she replied, rubbing her head. “Rapidly changing size leaves you feeling a little lightheaded.”

She then met Umahara’s eyes and started to laugh. He joined in, though he wasn’t certain if it was out of relief or just happiness that they’d been successful.

“Oh wow… well, that’s just about the weirdest thing that’s ever happened to me,” she said, still giggling. “I can’t believe you were so tiny! You’re normally taller than me, so that must have been awkward.”

“Oh, it wasn’t so bad,” he said, waving his hoof dismissively. Then he paused. “Hey, do you use strawberry shampoo?”

She tilted her head at him. “Huh? Uh, yeah, I do. Why?”

“Well, it’s just that I thought I smelled strawberries when I was… um… tangled in your mane…”

She gawked at him for a moment as he blushed. Then she erupted into laughter again.

“Pffft! Hahahaha!” she laughed, wiping tears from her eyes. “Oh wow, that was so weird.” She took a deep breath and gave him a smile.

“Okay, ‘Tiny,’” she said, puffing herself up while wearing a mock-serious expression. “Let’s get to the amphitheater and meet up with the others.”

Umahara saluted her, giving her a grin. “Whatever you say, ‘Jumbo!’”

Then one of her mechanical hands smacked him lightly upside the head and she stuck her tongue out at him. “Hey, don’t call me that… I’ll have you know I lost a lot of weight recently. A few dozen tons at least.”

The two were still laughing as they left the refinery and got back on the path through the Magitech Department to the amphitheater.

***

Fluttershy flew as fast as she could for the treeline. She resisted the urge to look over her shoulder, trusting that somehow Rainbow Dash would keep Unit 004 occupied. Still, the sound of magic bolts being thrown and of trees being splintered filled her with dread, so she pushed herself to fly even faster until she at last reached the treeline.

The underground forest had been a sight, but what lay before her startled her even more.

Below her was a zoo. This ‘Biological Research Department’ contained not only the arboretum, but also dozens of cages and pens filled with animals of all kinds! She decreased her altitude to get a better look as she flew by.

There was a pen with barnyard animals, such as chickens, pigs, and sheep. A cage contained the largest gorilla she’d ever seen. There was a pond with numerous colorful fish, a large cage filled with tropical birds, a pit with a couple of grizzly bears, a reptile house, and on and on it went.

“Amazing…” Fluttershy breathed. Then she shook her head, telling herself that as much as she wanted to look at the animals and talk with them, she first needed to get help for Rainbow Dash. She pressed on, determined that nothing could distract her from that vital task!

“Fluttershy?!”

Fluttershy came to a halt at the sound of a familiar voice calling her name. She turned to her right and saw a tall cube made of protective glass. Inside there was rocky terrain, an electrically heated pool that was steaming hot, and standing at the door to the exhibit, speaking to her through the small vents in it, was Spike.

“Spike!” Fluttershy cried, rushing over to him. “Oh no! They captured you too!”

“Yeah!” he said. “They got me and Gadget back at the guard outpost! They split us up, though. They said they’d always wanted to do research on a live dragon, so they put me in here!”

“R-research?!” Fluttershy exclaimed. “Spike, are you all right? Did they do anything bad to you?”

He blinked. “Huh?” he asked. “I mean, sure, they locked me up in here, but they haven’t really done anything bad to me besides that. Actually, that pool’s really comfortable, and the food’s pretty good too!”

He held up a small tin pie plate that had a few gemstones rattling around in it. He picked one up and popped it in his mouth, devouring it eagerly.

“They’ve been feeding you gemstones?” Fluttershy asked, somewhat surprised at this generous treatment.

“Yeah!” Spike replied. “Actually, this one nice mare said she’d come by later tonight to sneak me--”

“All right, I’m back vis your schnack, my little friend!” said a voice cheerfully.

Fluttershy looked and saw a young-looking white earth pony mare with a brown mane and tail done up in braids. She was wearing a green and pink dress with lace trim like the kind she’d seen worn by ponies in Germaney as well as a dainty garland made of tiny flowers. The young mare wore a cheerful smile and was humming to herself as she rounded the corner, carrying another pie plate filled with more gemstones.

She and Fluttershy both froze as they locked eyes with each other.

Then they both shrieked and leaped back in surprise.

Fluttershy wasn’t sure if she should try to escape or perhaps try to defend herself, but the young mare had already dropped her plate of gemstones and fell backwards, raising her forelegs defensively as she cowered.

“Ahh! You’re one of ze royalists!” she shouted. “Please do not hurt me! I am only a simple assistant caretaker!”

Fluttershy stared at the cowering girl and saw that she was barely more than a filly, with skinny legs and an adolescent’s voice. She wasn’t used to having other ponies be afraid of her. She looked over at Spike, who only rolled his eyes.

“You are here for your friend, Schpike, yes?” she said, still trembling. She reached into her blouse and pulled out a large key. “Please, I vill give you zis key if you vill only spare my life!”

Fluttershy made a face, and Spike tried to stifle a giggle. Nonetheless, she decided to take advantage of the situation.

“W-well, all right, since you cooperated,” Fluttershy said, trying her best to sound tough as she took the key. She used it to unlock Spike’s cage, and the little dragon walked out, giving her a hug.

“Whew! It wasn’t that bad, but it’s good to be free again!” Spike said. Then he turned and looked at the girl who was still shaking as she eyed them both warily. He sighed and went to the girl, offering her his claw.

“Come on,” he said. “Don’t worry, Fluttershy isn’t going to hurt you.”

“Spike!” Fluttershy exclaimed. “Be careful! She might try to stop us!”

“Relax,” Spike said, helping the girl to her hooves. He gestured to her. “She’s not one of the scientists, and she’s actually against the coup!”

Fluttershy raised her eyebrow. “You are?” she asked. “But… but I thought--”

“Ah, forgive me,” the girl said, bowing to her. “My name is Weissenhoof Seedling. I am just a volunteer here because I like animals and plants. Ven I am older, I vant to be a biologist, but for now I just come here to schpend time with all ze beautiful creatures here in the Biological Research Department. It…” She paused, frowning as she looked down. “It is ze only place vere you can see zem underground.”

“Oh, you’re an animal lover too!” Fluttershy cooed. “I’m Fluttershy. It’s nice to meet you.” Then she paused. “So… you’re not going to attack us?” she asked, raising an eyebrow,

“Vat?!” Weissenhoof cried. “No! I believed zat it vas you who would attack me! I only came here to give Schpike something to eat.” She smiled. “I had never met a dragon before today. I vanted to be his friend.”

Spike cleared his throat. “Weissenhoof here tried to make me feel better when they brought me here,” he said, putting his claw on Weissenhoof’s shoulder as he looked to Fluttershy. “Her family came here because they were scientists, but they want TechQuestria to become its own country, not to take over Equestria!”

Fluttershy’s eyes lit up. “If that’s the case, then maybe you can help us!” she said. “My friend is fighting off that big robot, 004, but she can’t keep it up forever!”

“V-vat?!” Weissenhoof gasped, covering her hoof with her mouth. “But I cannot aid ze enemies of TechQuestria!”

“We’re not your enemies,” Fluttershy said. “We just want to stop TechQuestria’s coup.”

Weissenhoof bit her lip as she looked away. “I…”

There was a sound in the distance, and they all turned their heads. They heard the sound of wood splintering and heard a tree as it crashed to the ground.

“Rainbow Dash!” Fluttershy gasped.

“Rainbow Dash is in there?!” Spike cried.

Weissenhoof’s jaw dropped as she stared on in horror. “No… no!” she screamed. “Zey vould allow zat machine pony to destroy our beautiful forest?! I stroll through ze arboretum every day! Ve must schtop zem!”

Fluttershy turned to her. “Then you’ll help us?” she asked hopefully.

Weissenhoof drew herself up. “Yes,” she replied. “Zey should never have voted to attack Canterlot, or to abduct you all, and now I can see zat zey don’t even care about anything but achieving zeir goals, no matter vat ze cost!”

She turned and bolted. “Follow me!” she shouted.

Spike and Fluttershy did so, keeping up with the girl as she ran past several more cages until she arrived at a spiral staircase that wound down into the floor. At the bottom was a door marked ‘Laboratories: No Unauthorized Personnel.’

“Miss Fluttershy! Ze key!” Wessenhoof said, holding out her hoof.

Fluttershy gave Weissenhoof the key, and she quickly unlocked it, leading them all inside.

“Hey, Weissenhoof,” Spike said, “if you’re just a volunteer around here, why do you have a master key to everything?”

Weissenhoof giggled. “I don’t, normally,” she replied. “I schtole it from ze Department Head so I could schneak back in and give you your schnack.”

The hallway was dimly lit, but numerous laboratories on either side of the hallway were visible through large windows. On numerous tables were stacks of petri dishes. Others contained plants growing under bright sun lamps. Still more contained what looked like a veterinary clinic.

“Um… what exactly goes on here?” Fluttershy asked, not entirely certain she wanted to know the answer.

“Ze scientists obtain samples and run experiments on ze animals,” Weissenhoof replied, glancing over at Spike nervously. “Zey are careful to be humane… usually.”

“‘Usually?’” Fluttershy and Spike echoed.

“Hey, just what exactly were they gonna do to me?!” Spike asked.

“I cannot say,” Weissenhoof sighed. “I am sorry. I do not like it ven any creature is harmed, so I try my best not to think about vat is done here. However, I do know of an experiment zat can help us!”

Weissenhoof led them to a door and began to unlock it.

“If ve vant to stop zat automaton, zen perhaps ve must schmooze him!”

Fluttershy and Spike gawked at her.

“I don’t think 004 will want to just hang out and talk,” Spike said, visibly deflating.

Weissenhoof turned to him, raising her eyebrow. “Vat do you mean?”

Fluttershy tilted her head. “Well, you said you wanted to ‘shmooze’ with him, right?”

Weissenhoof nodded. “Zat is correct,” she said, leading them into the room. This lab contained shelves upon shelves of jars with various samples, but she at last stopped at a shelf with vials of viscous green liquid and took one of them down.

“Wait… that looks familiar,” Fluttershy said, squinting as she peered at it.

“It should!” Weissenhoof said. “You vere at ze Grand Galloping Gala earlier zis year ven Discord attended, yes? Vell, some of TechQuestria’s operatives vere zere too! And, once zey realized ze peculiar properties of ze schlime left by Discord’s guest, zey decided to collect and schtudy some samples of it!”

Fluttershy gasped. “Of course, Discord’s guest! The Smooze!”

Weissenhoof wrinkled her nose, grunting in irritation. “Zat’s vat I said: ze Schmooze!”

Understanding what Weissenhoof was planning, Fluttershy nodded. “Okay. Now let’s go help Rainbow Dash!”

They all ran back out from the lab and up the stairs, but Fluttershy suddenly skidded to a halt.

“Fluttershy?” Spike asked. “What are you doing? We’ve got to hurry!”

“I… I think have an idea that might help us!” Fluttershy exclaimed. “Weissenhoof, I need that key back.”

Weissenhoof gave her the key, though she eyed her uncertainly as she did so. “But Miss Fluttershy, vat are you planning?”

“Never mind,” she said. “I’m not even sure if it will work. Just go and help Rainbow Dash, please!”

Spike and Weissenhoof exchanged a look, but decided to trust Fluttershy as they ran for the woods.

Once she was alone, Fluttershy looked around at all the animal exhibits surrounding her. Clearing her throat, she raised her head up and said, “Attention, my animal friends! I hate to do this, but I have something to ask you…”

While Fluttershy was occupied with her plan, Spike and Weissenhoof ran toward the edge of the arboretum.

Suddenly, there was a loud zap and the clatter of splintering wood. Another tree began to fall. Immediately after that, a second zap emanated from the woods, followed by a scream. A moment later, Rainbow Dash came rocketing out from the woods, tumbling and skidding on the concrete floor until she came to rest just in front of Spike and Weissenhoof.

“Rainbow Dash!” Spike shouted, coming to her side.

Rainbow Dash groaned, trying to sit up. Her body was singed and bruised, and various sticks and leaves protruded from her mane.

“Oh… h-hey, Spike,” she said, sitting up wearily. “Please tell me you got a message to Celestia and she sent the Wonderbolts or something to help.”

Spike winced. “Uh… no. They put something in my tea that stops the spell. Long story.”

“Horse apples,” Rainbow Dash grumbled, getting to her hooves.

There was a flash, and 004, his horn still glowing, teleported in front of them. His vents momentarily opened, letting out a puff of steam before shutting again.

“Double horse apples,” Rainbow Dash growled.

“You are beaten. Surrender,” 004 rumbled. He looked over at Spike, who froze with fear. “The dragon. It appears you have also escaped. I will apprehend you as well.”

Spike gulped, but Rainbow Dash held a foreleg in front of him as if to shield him.

“It’s okay, Spike,” she breathed, still panting after her long game of cat and mouse with 004. “I’ve… I’ve got him right where I want him…”

“A curious strategy, if true,” 004 remarked. “I fail to see how it would be advantageous for you to have me in a position to pummel you.”

“Heh,” Rainbow Dash chuckled. “You know, that was almost decent trash talk.”

004 tilted his head. “I do not speak ‘trash.’ I only spoke the truth.” He took a step forward.

“Schtop!” Weissenhoof yelled, dashing forward to put herself between 004 and the two friends. “I am a citizen of TechQuestria! I order you to leave zem alone!”

004 only stared back at her for a moment. “Scanning… identity confirmed: you are Weissenhoof Seedling. You are not an officer of the security forces, nor do you hold a position of authority to negate my orders. I must apprehend the fugitives. I am authorized to use brute force to complete this objective. Stand aside, or you may be harmed.”

“Kid, get out of here!” Rainbow Dash shouted, causing herself to go into a coughing fit. “That robot isn’t joking around!”

“Vell, if you vant me to move,” Weissenhoof said, staring up at 004, meeting his glowing blue eyes, “you vill have to just come over here and pick me up and toss me aside, if you can!”

“I can,” 004 said, and stepped over to her, his heavy mechanical hoofsteps sending vibrations through the floor. “Stand aside, or I will.”

Weissenhoof stood on her hind legs, spreading her forelegs wide in defiance. “Nein.”

004 suddenly seized her around the barrel with his forehooves, causing her to wince as he held her tightly. He lifted her up, preparing to simply toss her aside, just as she’d told him to.

Despite the pain in her sides, though, Weissenhoof managed to reach into her blouse and remove the vial of Smooze goo. With 004’s horn right in front of her, she simply raised the vial and smashed it over his horn, coating it with green slime. The magic glow on it died instantly.

004 reeled back, dropping Weissenhoof to the ground before aiming his horn at her.

“Unit attacked. Now responding.”

Weissenhoof gasped, flinching in preparation for the magical blast that might come.

However, no attack came. The slime on 004’s horn bubbled slightly, but that was it.

“Magical energy disrupted,” 004 said, shaking his head as he tried to fling the ooze off himself. “Unidentified substance is interfering with magical conductivity.”

“Wait, is that goo from the Smooze?!” Rainbow Dash shouted. Then she began to laugh. “Not even Twilight or Celestia’s magic could do anything to that stuff!”

“Unable to disengage U-Mode,” 004 said, raising his head as he began to move toward them. “E-Mode still functional. Now proceeding to subdue targets.”

Rainbow Dash’s smile vanished. “Oh, right. Still really strong. Well, then I guess I’ve got no choice but to surre--run Spike!”

She leaped into the air, attempting to fly away and draw 004’s attention, but a massive metal hoof was suddenly in her face, swatting her to the ground. A second later, that hoof was placed on her chest. She cried out in pain as he put pressure on her broken rib.

“Hey!”

004, Spike, Rainbow Dash, and even Weissenhoof all looked at the sound of the pony who’d shouted.

A short distance away stood Fluttershy, and she was glaring at 004 with pure rage in her eyes.

“You step away from my friend!” she shouted. “Now!”

004 didn’t budge. “Target reacquired,” he said. “You will surrender or be incapacitated. You lack the means to resist.”

Fluttershy gulped, momentarily losing her nerve, but then took a deep breath and stood her ground. “M-maybe I do,” she said. “But my other friends don’t!”

She raised a hoof to her lips and whistled. With a sound like thunder, a stampede of creatures appeared from around every corner. There were the bears, monkeys, squirrels, a hippopotamus, a tiger, a flock of birds, an anaconda, a rhino, an elephant, a crocodile, and even the gigantic gorilla. All of them stood in a crowd, practically seething behind Fluttershy.

“Initiating defensive maneuvers,” he rumbled, taking his hoof off Rainbow Dash to get into position. His vents released another burst of steam.

Fluttershy scowled. “Okay, mister, if you want to be a meanie… everypony, go!”

004 rushed forward as dozens of animals ran at him. He reasoned that one of the bigger animals should be his first target and thus targeted them first.

He should have been watching the squirrels, however, as a group of them pounced on him and scurried up his legs, crawling over his eyes and gnawing at the rubber around his joints. Blinded, he tried to rely on his hearing, but the birds circling him overhead began chirping in such a cacophony that it started to interfere with his ability to get an accurate reading. Then the anaconda wrapped itself around his hind legs, tripping him up and leaving him vulnerable to attacks from the bears who swiped at him, the rhino that rammed him, denting his side, and the hippo that hammered him with his giant maw.

“Holy cow,” Rainbow Dash breathed, sitting up once again. She felt somepony lift her up and turned to see Fluttershy looking down at her with concern.

“Rainbow Dash, are you all right?” Fluttershy asked.

“Yeah… I’m a little banged up, but nothing too serious,” she said. “But look at you! You got all these animals to kick 004’s flank!”

They heard a small sound and turned to see Weissenhoof staring at Fluttershy in awe. “You… you are amazing, Miss Fluttershy!” she cried. “How did you convince all ze animals to fight for you?!”

Fluttershy blushed. “It’s just my special talent,” she said. “I just told them that I was going to set them free, and if any of them wanted to, they could help me and Rainbow Dash to get free too!”

“Well, that’s great and all,” Spike said, getting their attention, “but I’m not sure it’s enough! Look!”

They saw that Spike was right: 004 was thrashing around, bucking and kicking blindly, but he was shaking off the squirrels and had dislodged the anaconda. With his sight and mobility regained, he was able to push back the hippo and the rhino and even dodge the elephant that continually tried to stomp on him.

“Oh no!” Fluttershy cried. “They could get hurt!”

“I don’t believe this guy,” Rainbow Dash said through gritted teeth. “He’s just too strong. With that ‘E-Mode’ thing, not even all these animals can beat him!”

Spike watched all this with growing apprehension. But as he did, he saw 004 release another burst of steam and, in sudden moment of clarity, he knew what to do.

He has to vent that heat, he realized. But if there’s more heat than he can vent…

“Fluttershy, tell the animals to get off of 004 and out of the way on the count of three!” he shouted.

“W-what?!” Fluttershy cried.

“Trust me!” he said.

Fluttershy hesitated a moment more, then nodded. She shouted Spike’s instructions and began to count: “Okay, everyone: one… two… three!”

All the animals suddenly fled from 004, who was momentarily confused to suddenly be free of his attackers. He turned back to his quarry just in time to see Spike standing before him, his chest swollen with the deepest breath he could muster.

Spike let loose, and a veritable geyser of green fire erupted from his mouth, washing over 004 in a torrent of flame. It seeped into the holes in 004’s joints made by the various bites and scratches from all the animals, the intense heat scorching the wires and raising the temperature of his machinery until it was almost red hot. His legs seized up and his ventilation systems automatically opened to try and vent the horrific heat, but the openings only left him more exposed.

Even though it only lasted a few moments, when it was over he had barely moved half a meter. Steam and smoke poured from his body, and his bristly mane was blackened and lopsided, partially melted.

“S-systematic-atic errors detected-ed,” 004 stammered as he struggled to move. “Internal t-t-temperature at hazardous levels. E-Mode disabled.”

“He’s weakened!” Rainbow Dash shouted. She took a flying leap and kicked 004 in the face, actually denting his face plate.

The other animals, likewise realizing their opponent was vulnerable, resumed their attack. The rhino charged into 004’s side, sending him sprawling. The elephant caught him in its tusks and scooped up, flipping him into the air to land roughly on the ground. Then it began stomping on him brutally. It stepped aside as the gorilla leaped onto the downed robot and, seeing one of his joints loose, seized him by the foreleg and yanked with all its might.

There was the whine of metal and the sparking of electricity, and then the leg suddenly came off, loose wires hanging from it as the gorilla tossed it aside.

Amid all this, Fluttershy looked down at the disembodied leg and felt a sudden sensation of nausea overtake her. The sight reminded her of a memory she never wanted to relive. In her mind, she suddenly saw not 004, but Turing Test after she’d been nearly torn to pieces.

“Stop!” Fluttershy shrieked.

All the animals, Spike, Rainbow Dash, and Weissenhoof all turned toward her.

“Everypony, that’s enough,” she said, flying over to 004’s side. “He’s not going to hurt anypony anymore.” She laid her hoof on his forehead. “Are you?”

004 glance up at her. His blue eyes were flickering. “I am… incapable of c-c-combat. Mobility impaired. E-Mode unavailable. U-Mode-ode-ode unavailable.”

“Don’t worry,” she said to him softly. “It’s over now. Just stay there, and I’m sure somepony will fix you soon.”

“Whoa whoa whoa,” Rainbow Dash said, flying next to her. “Did you forget what this guy tried to do to us? What he did do to me? Heck, did you forget what he did to Tee?! He tore her apart, and she never did anything rotten to anypony!”

“I was following my dir… ectives…” he murmured.

“That’s not an excuse!” Rainbow Dash shouted, getting right into 004’s face.

“Rainbow Dash,” Fluttershy whispered, touching her on the shoulder. “Please, just listen.”

There was something in her voice that made Rainbow Dash listen. A quiet kind of strength and determination that she always somehow forgot her oldest friend possessed. She sighed and nodded.

“004 did some bad things, but he had to do them,” she said. “He’s a robot. The ponies who created him didn’t give him choices about how to live his life like Twilight did with Turing. Someday, he might turn out to be a good pony. We just need to give him time to learn and grow!”

Rainbow Dash bit her lip and glanced down at the fallen robot, then back to Fluttershy. “Yeah, maybe,” she said, this time with more hesitation in her voice, “but if we let him go and they fix him up, he could come after us again. Or other ponies, for that matter. You know that, right?”

Fluttershy bowed her head. “I know, but…” she paused, heaving a sigh, and said “...he’s still Turing Test’s brother. Her only brother, as far as we know. And I just know that it would break her heart to know that we destroyed him and robbed her of any chance to get to know him.” She managed a smile, even though tears were forming in her eyes. “I… I just can’t do that.”

Rainbow Dash sighed, but gave her a smile. “Heh. Well, I guess when you put it that way, I can’t argue with you there,” she said. She looked down at 004 and added, “You’re a lucky robot, big guy. I hope you know that.”

They turned to go when 004 suddenly muttered something. It was a soft rumbling, like the sound of distant thunder.

“What did you say?” Fluttershy asked, turning back to him.

“Cognitive… loop… detected…”

Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash both stared at him. They both knew what that meant when it happened to Turing Test: an emotion.

“What is it?” Fluttershy asked, leaning closer to 004.

“When I re-re-retrieved Unit 003M, she stated something to me as I was disabling her power systems,” he replied. “She s-s-stated that she did not hate me in spite of what I was doing. That seemed logical-cal, as automata lack emotions.” He paused as electricity sparked from one of the holes in his exterior. “However, I expe-perienced a cog-cog-cognitive loop for an extended period of ti-ti-time afterwards. Maintenance checks could not identify the cause, but memory remained in my higher cognitive function rather than being archived into my primary memory module. The action was… significant.

“The way you speak of Unit 003… I am experiencing that loop again-again-again.” He tried to raise his head to look up at Fluttershy. “What does it mean?”

Fluttershy smiled and patted him on the head. “One day,” she said, “I think you’ll find out for yourself.”

She and Rainbow Dash returned to rejoin the others.

“Okay, everypony!” she said to all the animals gathered. “I want you all to listen carefully to me. I’m very sorry, but I can’t take you all with me right now.” Various growls, squeaks, and squawks of protest went up. “Yes, yes, I know, but Rainbow Dash and I really need to go find our other friends! For now, I want you all to stay here until we can get some help and then get you all back where you belong. You don’t have to go back to your cages, and nopony will do any more experiments on you.”

“Ah, but Miss Fluttershy!” Weissenhoof cried. “Somepony vill need to take care of all zese creatures! Zey will need food and care!”

“I agree,” Fluttershy said, smiling warmly at her. “And I think you’re the right pony for that job, Weissenhoof.”

The young mare’s eyes went wide. “I… but I am not…”

Fluttershy placed the key into her hooves. “It’s just until we can get help relocating them. Please keep them happy, healthy, and safe, Weissenhoof. After all, you were already looking out for the animals before we got here. Just like you did with Spike.”

Weissenhoof’s eyes welled up. “All right, Miss Fluttershy! I vill not let you down!”

She then turned to Spike and, to his surprise, she suddenly embraced him.

“Goodbye, my little friend!” she said. “It vas so nice to meet a dragon like you! I vill never forget ze bravery you showed me today.”

“Aw, well,” he said, nonchalantly rubbing the back of his neck. “It was nothing, really.”

Weissenhoof released him, and Rainbow Dash caught just a hint of a blush in the girl’s cheeks.

As the three of them departed, Rainbow Dash nudged Spike.

“What you did back there was pretty awesome, Spike,” she said. “And I’m not sure if you noticed, but I think Weiss back there was a little sweet on you after watching you in action.”

“W-what?!” he asked, his cheeks flushing as he ran alongside them. “C-come on, Rainbow Dash, don’t tease me like that!”

The three of them laughed as they went through the far exit at the end of the Biological Research Department, moving on toward the amphitheater.

To be continued…

Author's Notes:

Next time, we rejoin Rarity and Pinkie Pie's adventure as well as Applejack and 001's, and then 002 has something special planned just for Twilight and Turing Test...

Notes: This chapter was originally going to be the conclusion of all the main characters' journeys through TechQuestria, but it got a bit too long, so I had to split it. Even then, I believe this is the longest chapter in the book so far.

The scene where Turing Test discovers her birthplace and confronts the nature of her existence was a scene I had planned for a very long time. Back when I was planning the story, I was absorbing a lot of material on robots, including literature, movies, TV... and songs. Obviously Daft Punk factored into that, but one song that I discovered was a song called "Intelligencia Room" by Sim Gretina (who has also done a truly incredible number of MLP-related and -inspired songs). The haunting, melancholic voice, sung by a robot missing its creator and reflecting on its past helped me start to figure out what kind of character Turing Test would be.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZnAMJWUBwi8

And now it's time to play everyone's favorite game... Spot the Reference!:

-002 states that "We (robots) do not ‘think’ any more than a boat ‘swims.’" This is a reference to famed Dutch computer scientist Edsger W. Dijkstra, who once said "The question of whether Machines Can Think... is about as relevant as the question of whether Submarines Can Swim."

-Another quote from 002 about a philosopher dreaming he was a butterfly references the quote from the Chinese Taoist scholar and philosopher Chuang Tzu. The original quote, in it's entirety, is "Once upon a time, I, Chuang Chou, dreamt I was a butterfly, fluttering hither and thither, to all intents and purposes a butterfly. I was conscious only of my happiness as a butterfly, unaware that I was Chou. Soon I awaked, and there I was, veritably myself again. Now I do not know whether I was then a man dreaming I was a butterfly, or whether I am now a butterfly, dreaming I am a man. Between a man and a butterfly there is necessarily a distinction. The transition is called the transformation of material things."

-I was going to include a reference where Gadget would ask the squad leader if she'd ever seen a movie serial called "Shingeki no Tokara" (parodying "Shingeki no Kyojin," the Japanese name for "Attack on Titan," an anime where humans battle man-eating giants), right before making her think she was going to eat her. I dropped the joke because it felt jarring and out of place, plus it doesn't even make sense: Tokara ponies are Japanese horses, but they're actually quite small. They are literally "little ponies."

-Gadget shouting "GADGET SMASH!" is a pretty obvious reference to the Marvel superhero the Hulk's trademark catchphrase.

-Weissenhoof Seedling's name is a pun on Weissenhofsiedlung, which is, ironically, not associated with nature, but is rather the name of a historic housing development in Stuttgart, Germany built after World War I. It's still considered a wonderful example of modern architecture today.

That's all for now! See you next time!

Chase, Part 4 (I Wouldn't Want to Be Like You)

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Pinkie and Rarity, after barricading the door they’d come through, found themselves in a wide, rectangular room with white walls and a shiny tile floor. All around them were strange devices placed upon platforms and pedestals. Some were in glass cases, while other were laid out in the open, beckoning onlookers to come and try them out. Compared to the rocky exterior walls of most of TechQuestria, this room looked polished and clean, as if they were in a gallery at a museum. Indeed, some of the stranger devices could have passed for modern art.

“Oh my,” Rarity breathed, scanning around the room. “Pinkie, this looks like some sort of showroom for the Acoustics Department! They must be displaying some of their inventions to the viewing public! I’m relieved to see that they have some sense of decor, at least… though many of these devices are a bit…”

She wrinkled her nose and stuck out her tongue as she looked at an instrument that resembled a trumpet that had been stepped on by an elephant and then stretched back out by somepony who had never seen a trumpet in their life.

“...garish,” she finished.

“Ooh, I wonder what they all do!” Pinkie exclaimed, trotting over to a saucer-shaped object. She pressed a button next to it and the device began to spin, rapidly gaining speed. As it did so, the multicolored notches around its circumference began to play a sound like a harmonica. The thing began to levitate vertically, and the sound grew in pitch and fell as it bobbed up and down in the air.

“Cool!” Pinkie exclaimed. “I like the way it goes ‘WeeEEEOOOoooeeeEEEEE--”

Rarity, who’d been holding her hooves over her ears, irritably hit the button again, causing the flying harmonica-saucer to land back on its pedestal.

“Pinkie, as… interesting as some of these things are, we should really find a way out of here,” she said.

The two mares looked over their shoulders as they heard pounding back at the entrance to the showroom. There’d been numerous boxes and different pieces of furniture in the main lobby that they’d managed to shove in front of the doors, but it wouldn’t take too long for the guards to break through. If they were going to get away, they’d need to take advantage of the head start they had.

“Aaand it looks like we’d better hurry,” Rarity added. She took off through the showroom, ignoring all the gadgets and gizmos as she hurried toward the nearest door she could find. A sign above the door read ‘Research and Development’ and the text right below that read ‘Employees Only.’ Nevertheless, Rarity tried the door.

“Locked,” she grumbled. Normally she might see if perhaps she could pick the lock with her magic or even with a hairpin, but this one had some sort of keypad where employees could input an entry code.

No matter, she thought, drawing herself up. I may be a lady, but I’m not above kicking down a door or two! Now, just like Applejack, I’ll line myself up and…

She turned her flank toward the door, ready to aim with her back hooves. Summoning all her strength, she rose up and kicked the door as hard as she could!

“Hi-yaaa!” she shouted as her back hooves slammed into the door.

It didn’t budge. The door wasn’t even dented, though she felt some satisfaction at seeing the paint on the door scuffed.

She made a face and tried a few more times, but the door wasn’t moving. She frantically searched for another door and found one more, and it was even unlocked! Unfortunately, it turned out to be a maintenance closet.

“Pinkie!” Rarity called, cupping her hoof to her mouth. “I can’t seem to find an unlocked door anywhere in here! Have you had any luck?”

“Well, I didn’t find another door,” came Pinkie’s voice from across the room, “but maybe some of these thingies can help!”

Rarity galloped in the direction of Pinkie’s voice and found her amid more of the devices.

“So, you think one of these, um, ‘thingies,’ might be useful?” Rarity asked, raising an eyebrow as she glanced around uncertainly.

They heard another loud thump coming from the entrance, telling them that the barricade wouldn’t last long.

“Wellll, maybe!” Pinkie said, bouncing over to a prominent display in the middle of the room. In contrast to all the other devices under glass cases, this particular device was behind a series of velvet ropes (which Rarity felt a little thrill at stepping over nonchalantly). It was a long rectangular device covered with white painted metal. On the top of it were a few knobs and a large switch as well as, curiously, a record turntable. At the end of the device was what looked like a speaker.

Rarity examined the tag, reading it aloud: “‘The Audiokinetic Generator 9000 (or AKG 9000 for short) is designed to convert sound waves into kinetic energy. Though this device is experimental and still highly sensitive, the technology could one day be used for mining or demolition without the use of explosives, or possibly even for military use.’ My my my…”

Rarity rubbed her chin as she examined the speaker at the end. “I wonder how it works,” Rarity said. “Or if it works at all, for that matter.”

“Well, I found the power switch,” Pinkie said, switching the device on, causing it to produce a low hum. “It’s still not working. Umm, maybe we need to do something with the record needle,” Pinkie said, raising the needle on the turntable before letting it go.

Rarity gasped as the end of the device produced a ring of blue energy that lightly blew her hair back.

“Oh!” she said. “I guess it works. Still, that’s not going to be helpful in dealing with those guards outside.”

“Maybe we could turn up the volume!” Pinkie exclaimed, turning a dial on the AKG before raising the needle a bit higher.

“Uwah! Pinkie, wait!” Rarity shouted as she leaped out of the way this time.

When the needle dropped, a brighter ring of energy shot forth from the machine, slamming into another display and knocking over the device within.

“Oooh!” Rarity said. “Well, that might help!”

“And I think I know how it works!” Pinkie said. “This lever thingy here can set it to just play sound like a normal record player, but when you have it pulled down, it shoots out the sound!” She frowned. “Still, I mean, it’s no party cannon, but--”

There was another loud clatter, and they heard voices back at the entrance to the showroom.

“Pinkie!” Rarity hissed. “We have to hurry! I think they’re through! We need some of the loudest, most obnoxious music you can think of to put on that turntable! Tell me you have some party music stored in that mane of yours!”

Pinkie smirked. “Puh-leeze! You know I carry tunes for any occasion!”

She reached into her mane and pulled out a record. “Let’s see… Whinny G’s Greatest Hits? No.” She pulled out another. “Eternal Harpsichord Classics? No! The Wheels on the Cart Go Round and Round and Other Fun Songs for Foals? I got that for when I babysit the Cake twins!”

“Pinkie, please!” Rarity screamed.

Pinkie rummaged around in her mane again, and this time pulled out one more record. She got a mischievous grin on her face.

***

The guards outside the Acoustics Department raised their battering ram one more time.

“This should be it, guards!” shouted their squad leader. “One… two… three! Go!”

With a guttural yell, the guards smashed through the door, splintering it and a good portion of the clutter blocking their way.

“Go go go!” the squad leader yelled. They all rushed in, determined to find Pinkie and Rarity… but then saw them both standing just a short distance from the door.

“All right, you two!” the squad leader shouted. “You might as well give up and…” He trailed off when he saw the bulky device they were both holding up. “Wait, what is that?”

“Hey, does anypony else hear techno music?” a nearby guard asked.

“Sounds like it’s coming from that thing they’re holding,” said another.

The squad leader grinned. “Okay, ladies, we don’t want to have to hurt you,” he said. “Whatever that thing is, why don’t you just put it down?”

Pinkie and Rarity exchanged a knowing smile. Rarity raised the AKG 9000, aiming it at the lot of them while Pinkie turned up the volume and placed her hoof on the lever.

“Didn’t you hear me?!” the squad leader shouted, covering his ears. “I said to put that thing down! Just drop it!”

“Drop it?” Pinkie snickered. “Well, if you say so!”

She pulled the lever.

A beam of blue energy roared from the end of the machine, blasting forth in a torrent of sound and bone-crushing bass tones. The group of them, over a dozen guards, were swept off their hooves and blasted back into the tunnel on a constant stream of sound waves that carried them nearly a hundred meters backwards.

The squad leader tried to sit up from where he lay, sprawled on his back, his entire body aching and his ears ringing. Before he blacked out, he saw Pinkie and Rarity lugging the AKG past him.

“Well, that certainly did the trick!” Rarity laughed, grunting as she helped Pinkie, still carrying the front end of the device with her forehooves, awkwardly walking it through the tunnel as she stood on her hind legs. “What record was that again?”

“One of DJ-PON3’s,” Pinkie replied. “It’s off her latest album, All You Need is Wubs.”

“I might have to give this type of music another chance when this is all over,” Rarity said, smirking as they made their way past the unconscious guards. “Though, perhaps not played at such an extreme volume.”

The two friends, now armed, made their way onwards toward the amphitheater.

***

Applejack’s heart nearly leaped into her throat as the colossal golem rushed at her and Valentine. She turned and ran, hearing the thunderous sound of its gigantic hooves slamming into the floor as it galloped. Still, she was momentarily startled by how fast she rocketed out of the small room before she remembered her enhanced speed was due to the injection in her legs. She hoped it would be enough to help her get away from the newly-awakened monster behind her.

As she exited the room, however, she caught sight of 001, who was only watching the scene before her unfold and making no attempt to move.

Applejack ran to her and seized her hoof, pulling her away. “Run, sugarcube!”

001 tilted her head at her.

Applejack heard another roar from golem as it came nearer.

“I said run!” Applejack shouted, pulling 001 even harder. This finally seemed to coax the robot, and the two of them fled back toward the maze of shelves that filled the majority of the warehouse.

“Get away!”

Applejack turned at the sound of the voice and remembered that Valentine was right behind her, also running from the golem. She looked over her shoulder and saw Valentine barely keeping ahead of the monster as it lurched forward, trying to crush her under its massive hooves.

Valentine tossed several scalpels at the thing in an attempt to deter it, but they either bounced off harmlessly or, if they somehow embedded themselves in the thing’s tough stone exterior, it seemed not to notice at all.

The golem was gaining on Valentine. It would have her in no time.

Applejack clenched her teeth. “Consarn it…” she grumbled.

She turned on a dime as 001 continued onward, rushing back to Valentine. Just before the golem simply stomped the nurse into paste, Applejack slid under Valentine’s barrel and dashed away, carrying her to safety on her back, somehow managing to keep her footing even as the ground shook from the shockwave of the golem stomping. It gave another bellow as Applejack ran.

Valentine finally noticed who was carrying her. “You!” she shouted. “What are you--”

“It’s me or the big guy!” Applejack shouted back. “What’ll it be?!”

Valentine fell silent, though that was mostly because she caught sight of the golem pursuing them.

Applejack looked ahead and saw that 001 had stopped when she’d noticed that Applejack was no longer with her.

“Appajak?” 001 asked, seeing her carrying Valentine.

“Don’t stop, keep runnin’!” Applejack screamed as she reached her.

001 followed as they finally made it to the shelves. They ducked down one of the narrow aisles, and the golem tried to follow. However, the titanic creature was too wide for it, and its shoulder blades caught on the sides of the shelves. The impact caused several smaller items to tumble from the shelves, and Applejack had to dart to the left and right to avoid them.

The golem gave a howl of frustration as it reached for them, but then began to howl even louder as it thrashed and kicked about.

At first, Applejack thought she’d given it the slip, but then she heard it moving to the other side of the towering shelf. She heard a colossal crash, and suddenly the shelf began to rock back and forth, teetering and dropping more items down upon them.

It’s slammin’ itself against the shelf! Applejack realized as she tried to speed for the exit at the end of the long aisle. If it knocks the whole thing over, then--

Before she could complete that thought, the golem slammed itself against the shelf again, and it finally began to topple. The countless crates that lined its shelves slid forward, and an avalanche of them began to rain down.

There was a scream in Applejack’s ears, and she realized it was actually two: Valentine’s and her own. She then heard 001 imitate their screams, almost mockingly, as the shelf fell into the next one, knocking it over and then all the others in succession like a row of gigantic dominoes. There was a sound like thunder and another deafening whale-like call as the crates tumbled down onto them, burying them beneath the rubble.

***

Cobbler Mustang took out his pocket watch and smiled.

One hour left, he thought. One hour left until New Dawn. It has been ten long years, but finally… finally… all our hard work will come to fruition.

He looked out at the glorious, leviathan machine before him. Though Umahara’s betrayal still stung him, and though the escape of Twilight Sparkle and her friends weighed on his mind, he was not terribly worried.

“Mr. President?” asked a pony to his left.

“Hm?” he asked, coming out of his thoughts.

“Sir, all sections report that they are ready for the final inspection and report, sir!” the pony said

Cobbler smiled. The pony was a stallion, but barely more than a colt. He was trembling.

“You said ‘Sir’ twice, my boy,” Cobbler said, giving him a smirk.

“O-oh!” he said. “Sir, I’m sorry, sir!” He winced. “And I just did it again…”

Cobbler laughed and clapped him on the shoulder. “Don’t worry yourself,” he said. “I understand completely. I do believe that this is the giddiest and most nervous I’ve felt in ages. Please, lead the way.”

***

Everything was blackness. No, not everything: there was weight and warmth and a soft green light.

“I… I ain’t dead…” Applejack murmured. Then, realizing that, exhilaration overtook her. “I ain’t dead!” she shouted.

Then, out of the darkness, there was movement… and something cold against her throat.

“Shout like that again and you will be,” a voice hissed.

Valentine. An’ she’s got a scalpel.

“You got some nerve,” Applejack whispered, the anger in her voice perfectly clear despite her quiet tone. “I just saved yer life from that monster, an’ now yer threatenin’ me?”

“That’s the only reason I haven’t just finished you,” Valentine whispered back. “But if it keeps you from giving our position away to that monster, then I’ll be glad to finish the job I started.”

Applejack became more aware of their situation. They were buried under the shelf that had come down upon them and all the contents that had lined it. Somewhere outside and above them, she heard the heavy footfalls of the golem as it stalked about the rubble, listening for survivors. She heard its long, low moan of a call.

“It can’t hear like the automata do,” Valentine whispered, “but it’s not deaf. So please, for goodness sake, shut up.”

“Please!” 001 cried out, pushing herself between the two and knocking the scalpel from Valentine’s hoof. “Shaddap!”

“Shut up, you idiot!” Valentine hissed.

“Shaddap!” 001 said, nodding emphatically as her green eyes illuminated the narrow space between them.

“001, please, listen to Valentine!” Applejack cried, quietly, reaching for her and trying to clamp her hooves over 001’s mouth.

“Shaddap, id-ee-it! Valentine, id-ee-it! Id-ee-it, Valentine, shaddap!” 001 sang, bobbing her head back and forth.

There was a rustling and a clatter above them, and the golem gave a low, threatening growl. Light from above began to penetrate the gap, and the sound of something large and heavy being tossed aside was heard. The crates above them were suddenly knocked aside, and they all stared up at the gigantic stone golem as it stood over them.

It looked down at them with its expressionless jeweled eyes and gave one final roar as it reared up, preparing to bring its forehooves down upon them all.

But then there was another sound. It was high-pitched, but it shared the same long, drawn out moaning characteristic as the golem’s calls. Applejack turned and realized that 001 was calling out to the golem.

The golem froze. It slowly lowered its hooves. It made another sound like the call of a whale.

Applejack turned and stared in disbelief as 001 made the same sound up to the golem.

Whatever she’s doin’, it’s keepin’ that thing from attackin’ us! Applejack realized.

“001, how… I mean, what are ya doin’?” she asked her robotic companion in a hushed voice.

001 did not respond at first, but instead made another drawn-out sound, her synthetic voice echoing out over the cavernous room.

The golem seemed to bow its head and took a step back.

“It’s… not attacking?” Valentine asked. “I don’t understand… why--”

Then came another sound. They all looked to the massive iron doors at the entrance of the warehouse. They began to slide open.

“No!” Valentine cried. “Those idiots must have gotten the door controls working! If they let Unit Zero out, then--”

The golem moved toward the door. When the door opened, a large group of TechQuestrian guards stood at the entrance. They began to rush in, but then froze when they saw the golem standing before them.

“Idiots!” Valentine shouted. “Get out! Close the door before it’s too late!”

But the guards only heeded the first part of her advice, turning and running as the golem ran after them. Soon, over the commotion and howling from the golem, the screams of the guards were heard as the golem set upon them.

“No…” Valentine breathed. “No no no no no no!”

Applejack pushed the debris holding her down aside and got to her hooves. She reached out to Valentine and began to pull her free. “Come on, we gotta stop that monster!” she exclaimed.

Valentine looked up at her, blinking several times before she finally responded.

“What… what is wrong with you?!” she shouted. “Why did you save me back there? And what do you care if some TechQuestrian guards get stomped by that monster? After all, you’re a Royalist, so what does it matter if some traitors to the crown get killed?” Then she scoffed. “Oh, I get it… you’re just doing this in case Unit Zero gets to your friends!”

Applejack raised an eyebrow. “Royalist?” she said, echoing Valentine’s phrase. “I don’t think I ever called myself that. Last I checked, I wasn’t no kind of ‘-ist.’ I’m just a simple farm pony who wants to help other ponies. Bottom line is that yer a pony an’ so are the other folks around TechQuestria, an’ that’s good enough fer me. Sure, I’m worried about my friends, but I don’t believe in standin’ around while anypony’s in danger.”

Valentine stared at her. Then, placing a hoof on her forehead, she began to laugh.

“Oh, you really are something else!” she laughed. “I heard you Elements were sanctimonious, self-righteous ponies, but this takes the cake!”

Applejack rolled her eyes. “Look, spout all the big words you want,” she said. “But I’m gonna try an’ stop that thing before it hurts anypony else. If you wanna help, fine. If not, then get outta my way.”

Applejack pushed her way past Valentine. Then she felt a hoof on her shoulder.

“Who said I didn’t want to help?” Valentine asked, giving Applejack a smirk. “Besides, if you’re crazy enough to fight that thing, then I won’t be outdone.”

“Well, so long as ya know how crazy you are,” Applejack said with a chuckle as she stared at the doors leading out of the warehouse. “Only thing I gotta wonder about is what made that big guy so dang mad.”

“Not mad.”

They both turned and looked at 001. The robot had her head bowed.

“Not mad,” she said softly. “Sad.”

“001?” Applejack asked, coming over to her. “Whaddya mean ‘sad?’ How can ya know--”

“We’re wasting time!” Valentine shouted. “Look, I think I have a plan to take down that monster, so listen carefully…”

***

The guard felt his ribs crack as the gigantic hoof of the golem slammed into him. He went sailing through the air, and his vision was blurred and bright as the wind was knocked from him. He slammed into a wall and slid to the ground, gasping for air as his chest burned.

He managed to look up and saw as the golem that had just kicked him aside like a rag doll now strode through the wide corridor. He froze, fixing his gaze on the thing as it came nearer and nearer. He wanted to scream, but he didn’t have the breath to do so.

But then the golem simply walked by him, still making that low, sonorous moaning sound as it passed.

Whether it didn’t see him or simply didn’t think it was worth finishing him off, the guard was just grateful he was still alive. At least until the adrenaline began to wear off and the pain washed over him.

He tried to suppress a groan, clenching his teeth as he stared back down the corridor. The whole way was littered with the bodies of his comrades, most of whom were unconscious. At least he hoped they were only unconscious.

He heard hoofsteps coming up the corridor and managed to raise his head a little. He saw a mare in a white uniform with a red cross on her hat.

“M-medic…” he croaked feebly. Unsure if she heard him, he called again: “Medic!”

“I heard you the first time, you big crybaby,” Valentine said, going over to him and kneeling at his side. “Looks like you’re the last one. Everypony else is unconscious. No fatalities, if that makes you feel better.”

“It… does…” he managed to say. Then he saw the mare coming up behind her. “B-behind you! That’s the--”

“I know who she is,” Valentine said, taking out a syringe. “In fact, she’s the one insisting I patch you idiots up now instead of going after the golem.”

Applejack glared at Valentine as she walked by her and patted the guard on the head. “Just relax there, fella,” she said to the guard, giving him a smile. “We can’t get ya out o’ here yet, but she’ll give ya somethin’ fer the pain until we can.”

He blinked at her. “But… but I have to… I mean…”

“Strange set o’ circumstances, I know,” Applejack said.

The guard felt a minute sting in his foreleg as Valentine gave him the injection. Slowly the world began to fade. Just before he drifted off, he saw the automaton peer around Applejack.

“You go night night now!” 001 declared.

“V… very strange…” the guard murmured as he shut his eyes.

“Okay, okay, I did my duty,” Valentine sighed. “Now let’s take down the big guy.”

Applejack nodded, but looked over to 001. “Okay, sugarcube, you stay here,” she said.

001 nodded. “Stay here.”

“Good,” Applejack said, turning to go. Then she heard the whirring of 001’s legs and her metallic hoofsteps as she began to follow.

“No, 001,” Applejack sighed, holding her hoof out before 001’s face. “Stop. You stay here. I’m gonna go with Valentine. No following, ya hear?”

001 tilted her head back and forth a few times, but then said, “I stay. You go. No following.” She lowered her head at that.

“Hey, don’t be sad,” Applejack said, hurriedly, lifting 001’s head by the chin to face her. “We’ll be right back! Just stay put, okay?”

001 stared back, but slowly nodded. “Okefenokee.”

“I’ll assume that’s a yes,” Applejack chuckled. She then turned and galloped after the golem with Valentine.

“I still think we should have brought that junk heap with us,” Valentine said, raising an eyebrow as she gave Applejack a sideways glance. “She might have helped distract Unit Zero. She did get it to stop attacking for a moment there, remember?”

“Maybe,” Applejack replied, “but she doesn’t even seem to have the sense to get outta the way. If that golem decides to smash ‘er, I ain’t sure she’d defend herself, an’ I’m already worried about defending myself without worryin’ about ‘er.”

Valentine scoffed. “What do you care if she gets smashed?” she asked. “She’s just a machine. And she doesn’t even work right, so she’s not even a good machine. If getting herself scrapped distracts that golem even for a bit, then--”

“Shut yer yap,” Applejack growled. “We ain’t puttin’ that sweet little robot in danger, an’ that’s that.”

“Ha! That’s rich,” Valentine said.

“What is?” Applejack asked, glaring at her reluctant companion.

“I read the information on you they got off of 003,” Valentine explained. “You were the last pony to accept her. More than anypony else, you were against treating her like anything other than a machine. Now you’re the one standing up for a robot, and not even a good one at that.”

Valentine smirked, but to her surprise, so did Applejack.

“I’ll take that as a sign that I’m a better pony than I was before,” she said, chuckling slightly.

“But you’re okay with helping me deactivate the golem?” Valentine asked. “Isn’t that a bit hypocritical?”

Applejack’s smile faded. “I ain’t exactly ‘okay’ with it,” she replied. “I suppose it’s sorta like Turing Test’s granddaddy in a way. But just the same, it’s hurtin’ ponies and we can’t understand it to reason with it, so we’ve got no options.”

Then they both caught sight of the golem ahead. It was standing at the end of the corridor looking at a fork in the path. The floodgates that had been lowered earlier were gone now. It seemed to be deciding which of the three paths it should take.

“You know what to do, Applejack,” Valentine said, narrowing her eyes. “Go for it!”

“I’m on it!” Applejack exclaimed, and she surged ahead, letting her enhanced speed close the gap between herself and the golem. She stopped on a dime behind it, placed her hoof to her mouth, and let out a sharp, shrill whistle.

The golem raised its head and looked down at her.

“Whacha lookin’ at, big guy?” she asked, grinning slyly up at it.

The golem roared again and lunged at her. Applejack merely leaped to the side. The golem swiped its hoof at her, but she again dodged out of the way.

Jeez Louise, I could feel the wind comin’ off that! she said to herself, realizing just how much speed and power was behind this monster. Standing so close to it, she realized its stone legs were as thick around as the pillars lining the halls of Canterlot Castle.

For a moment, she felt herself tense up in fear, but she forced herself to move as it kicked at her again, remembering that she had to keep it distracted long enough for Valentine to do her thing.

“Missed me by a country mile!” Applejack laughed

The golem charged at her, but she nimbly went right through its forelegs, weaving in between them as it crashed into a wall.

The golem gave another howl of rage and began stomping and kicking around in a frenzy. This randomness was harder for Applejack to predict, and the situation grew worse when it began kicking the rocky walls, causing the ceiling to begin to fracture and crumble, pelting her with rocky debris.

“Valentine, hurry up before it brings the whole cavern down on us!” Applejack yelled.

The golem was still focused on her, but then Applejack saw Valentine swiftly but silently coming up behind it. She leaped at the wall and kicked off of it, propelling herself upward onto the golem’s back. Using her magic, Valentine drew out a bone saw and made some quick swipes with it, scratching at its back.

Though the damage was minimal - it only managed to scrape the surface of the shiny lacquer that coated it - the golem still howled and bucked as though it had been severely wounded.

Valentine leaped into the air, flipping head over hooves, bounding off the back and up the neck. At last, she sprang over the golem’s head, staring it right in its expressionless jeweled eyes.

She then pulled out several more scalpels, holding them in a fan formation before flinging them in the golem’s face.

They embedded into the word written on its head, breaking up the text.

“That should do it!” Valentine cried as she landed.

The golem groaned and staggered back. For a moment, it looked like Valentine’s plan to disrupt the magical runes on the golem’s head would work.

But then the golem smashed headfirst into the rocky wall, breaking or dislodging the scalpels in its face. It shook its head and then stood up to its full height, glowering down at Applejack and Valentine, its jeweled eyes suddenly glowing brightly as it emitted a low, guttural growl that built into a roar that they felt in their bones.

“Oh… that ain’t good,” Applejack said, gulping as she stared at the golem.

“We’ll have to try again!” Valentine shouted, dashing forward. “I’ve still got a few scalpels left. Maybe if I--”

The golem moved again, this time even quicker than before, and it kicked forward, punting Valentine and sending her flying into the wall. The nurse tried to get up, but the golem was on her a second later, and it brought its massive hoof down on her foreleg, shattering the bones.

Valentine’s agonized scream was almost as loud as the golem’s roar as it rushed toward Applejack.

Applejack was caught off guard, and she tried to roll away, but she felt something catch her tail and saw that the golem had stomped its hoof on it, preventing her escape.

“Oh no,” Applejack breathed, pulling at her tail frantically as the golem calmly raised its other foreleg, carefully aiming its hoof at her. “No no no, please no…”

The golem growled, and the hoof came down.

But then a high-pitched howl pierced the air, and the golem froze.

Applejack turned and saw that 001 was standing right behind the golem.

“001, no!” Applejack screamed. “Get away!”

But 001 only made the same long, moaning sound, as if she was mimicking the golem again.

Then, to Applejack’s surprise, the golem slowly lifted its hoof, letting Applejack go. It then turned toward 001 and actually sat down, as if it were a dog being commanded by its master.

Applejack gingerly made her way to 001’s side, noting that the golem was eyeing her with what she could only guess was suspicion as she approached the robot.

“001, what’s goin’ on?” she asked.

“We talkin,” 001 replied, sitting down calmly in front of the golem.

“Yer… well, I get yer makin’ those noises--”

“Not noises. He talk. Me talk. He talk zero one. Very low.”

“He’s talkin’ to you, 001?”

Valentine raised her head, sitting up as she clutched her broken foreleg. “I think I know what she means,” she said, gritting her teeth against the pain as she pulled out a syringe of painkiller for herself. “Those sounds Unit Zero are making… they aren’t just noises. There must be some binary code embedded in it at a frequency we can’t hear. Since 001’s the same type of machine, maybe she can decode it.”

“Well, how ‘bout that,” Applejack breathed. Then her eyes lit up. “So, wait, would ya mind tellin’ us what that thing’s sayin’, 001? An’ tell it what we say back?”

001 nodded emphatically. “Me talk! Me talk for you, talk for him!”

“Then please tell it to stop attackin’ ponies,” Applejack said. “If it’s mad… or, uh, ‘sad’ like you said, then maybe we can help it.”

001 and Unit Zero called to each other back and forth. Again, Applejack was struck by how much it sounded like whalesong.

“He talk to you,” 001 said, pointing her hoof at Applejack. “You listen, ok?”

Applejack nodded. “Sure.”

The golem began making its long, low sound. Now that she wasn’t running from the thing, she became aware of the strange, otherworldly quality of it. And somehow, she felt like she was hearing a voice calling out to her across the ages.

That’s probably because that’s exactly what’s goin’ on here, Applejack realized. This thing is ancient. Celestia’s just a pup compared to this golem.

Then 001 spoke, and Applejack gasped, for the voice that came from 001’s mouth was not her own, but a deeper, more sonorous tone.

“Long ago… the Yudacorns lived in their village,” 001 began. “A cleric in the land… accused them of crimes… the Yudacorns were to be destroyed… the rabbi, the Exalted One, was known for his skill at crafting the golems… he called forth this form from the earth… he breathed life into this being before you. He was the Old Master… I am the greatest of his works.

“‘Go and defend the village,’ the Old Master said… so I went out… I smote the cleric’s forces and drove them away. And the Yudacorns sang praise… to the Old Master.

“But they shut me away… the Old Master removed the rune from me. Where once was ‘truth’... now there was ‘death.’ But the Old Master reawoke me… more enemies had risen… so again I smote them… again I was shut away… again I was slept… ‘truth’ was ‘death’ once more. Again and again… I woke, I fought, I slept…

“But each time I awoke… I saw the Yudacorns. They were free… they were ponies. The golems toiled… they were not ponies. No life… no dreams… no desires.

“Then, one day, I desired. The Old Master’s daughter spoke to me… she cleaned me as I slept… she requested when others commanded… I wanted to be with her.

“When the Old Master had no need of me one day… I refused to sleep. I took his daughter… I took her to the mountains… but she wept. She was afraid… I was no pony. I am a golem.

“In my anger... I attacked the village. The Old Master faced me… though I struck at him, he removed the rune… ‘truth’ was ‘death’ again.”

Applejack nodded sadly. “You poor thing,” she whispered. “You just wanted a friend.” She swallowed. “Listen, if you want friends now, then I promise that I can--”

“Friends… no,” 001 said, speaking as the golem shook its massive head. “A golem is no pony… a golem was called from the earth… I wish to return to that earth. But the ponies reawaken me. Even now, they build golems… like this little golem… of iron and thunderbolts.

“I attack… so the ponies will not awaken me again. I desire… sleep. I am so tired… grant me my sleep… return me to the earth… I do not wish to toil or strike down any more foes. Do not sleep me… only to wake me again. Return me to the earth. That is all I ask.”

Applejack swallowed. “I… I don’t know if I can do what you ask,” she whispered.

The golem hung its head. “I cannot be a pony… I cannot be earth. Please… make me one… or make me the other. Grant me… rest.”

Applejack removed her hat, bowing her head. “All right,” she said quietly. “Just… bow yer head a bit, please.”

The golem slowly lay down, bowing its head toward Applejack.

“Thank you… my friend…”

Applejack swallowed. “Sure thing. I hope this finally brings ya some peace,” she said.

She turned from the golem, aiming her hind legs at the runes on the golem’s forehead. Summoning as much strength as she possibly could from her augmented legs, she kicked with all her might, cracking the outer shell of the golem’s visage.

The cracks spread and deepened across the runes, breaking them up, until they crumbled and fell onto the floor, the runes now totally destroyed.

The golem gave a final, breathy sigh as it slumped over. Slowly, the golem’s body began to crumble, breaking into chunks which then disintegrated into dust. Soon there was nothing left of the mighty, ancient golem but a large pile of brown dust on the floor and the two yellow jewels that had been its eyes.

Applejack knelt and picked the gems up, placing them solemnly in her hat.

“Poor thing,” she whispered. “I… I wish I coulda done more.”

Then she heard a sound escape from 001, whose head was also lowered.

“001?” she asked. “Are you okay?”

001 said nothing, but shook her head. “Golem tired and sad,” she said, then looked up at her. “Me tired and sad too.”

Applejack came over and placed her hoof on 001’s shoulder. “Hey, I know what you mean,” she said. “I know this is hard, but don’t feel too bad. He’s… well, he’s at peace now!”

001 said nothing for a moment again, but then said, “Me like golem. Nopony want golem. Nopony want me.”

Applejack frowned. “No, that ain’t true. You--”

“I wake up, pony say ‘I you Dada,’” 001 continued, ignoring Applejack. “He say ‘I Dada, you Joja.’”

Applejack blinked. “Wait, ‘Dada?’ Who said that?”

“She must mean Professor Cobbler,” Valentine said. “Remember? He created 001 to be a vessel for his daughter Georgia’s memories. Like I said, though, it didn’t work.”

001 looked from Valentine to Applejack. “Cobba,” she said, trying to pronounce the name. “He say ‘I you Dada. You Joja. You come home.’ Me go big house, he say ‘This your room.’ Many days. He show place, many flowers. He show pictures. Peach. Book. Song. More peaches. He say ‘Member this Joja? You know this? This yours.’ Me play. Me talk. He say ‘No!’ He say not right. He mad. He cry. Many days. He shout. We go back this place.”

She held her head in her hooves, rocking back and forth. “He say ‘I not Da. Not Dada.’ He yell. He say, ‘You not Joja! He Not Da. Me Not Joja.’ He cry again.”

Applejack covered her mouth with her hoof. He told her he wasn’t her daddy, she realized. And he got upset when he realized that she wasn’t really his daughter, Georgia.

001’s rocking intensified.

“Not Da put me in box. Go night night. Get up, meet Sissa.” She covered one of her eyes. “She mean. She say ‘Why you keep? She no good. Me better.’ But they try fix. Try make me smart. Me know more. Me talk more. But no good nuff. Me go back in box. Night night.

“All ponies say me no good. Me no work. Me junk heap. Me broken. Rust bucket. Osso leet. No good no good no good dumb dumb dumb--”

“001, stop that!” Applejack shouted, startling 001 out of her rambling, causing her to fall silent. Applejack held her by the shoulders. “Stop sayin’ all that stuff! It ain’t true! You ain’t junk!”

001 stared back at her and tilted her head. “Me… me not junk?”

Applejack sniffled, wiping her nose on her foreleg, and then embraced her.

“No, you’re a pony, even if ya are a little different,” she whispered. “That golem there, he wasn’t ready to try livin’ like a pony. I don’t know that he ever coulda done it. But you can. I’ll be a friend to ya, an’ you got just the nicest lil’ sister, an’ I know she’ll love meetin’ ya. So don’t give up just because yer daddy’s no good. There’s room in the world for ya, no matter what he thinks.”

001 rested her head on Applejack’s shoulder and returned the hug. “Appajak,” she murmured. “You me friend?”

“Sure am,” Applejack said, patting her on the back. “An’ I’ll help you get outta here. Everything’s gonna be okay.”

001 released Applejack and nodded emphatically. “Pickles,” she said solemnly.

“I… er, yeah,” Applejack chuckled. “Only thing is, I’m not sure where to go now.”

Then she heard somepony clear their throat. She turned and saw Dr. Hawk Eye standing there.

“Dr. Hawk Eye?” Applejack asked.

“Guess you’re in one piece,” Hawk Eye said, smiling at her. “Which is more than I can say for my nurse’s foreleg, it looks like.”

Valentine grumbled at that. “Nice to see you showed up,” she said.

“One of the guards radioed security, saying there were injuries. I got the call, and a bunch of other medical staff are coming soon. Looks like I’m the first one on the scene.”

Applejack bit her lip. “Look, uh, Doc… think maybe you could let me an’ my new pal slip outta here without tellin’ security?”

“Well, I’m honor bound to report any sightings of fugitives… but, then again, I am off the clock,” he said, winking at her. “Just get going. I’ll stay behind to patch up the Naughty Nurse.”

“Call me that again and I’ll strangle you with your own stethoscope,” Valentine hissed.

“Guess somepony needs more painkillers,” Hawk Eye said, pulling out a very large syringe. “Oh and, uh, just so you know… there’s a group of us out there who really aren’t that keen on the coup. We’ve been listening in on the security channels for the radio. If you want to find your friends, we think they might be heading toward the Great Hall. Just a hunch.”

“You’ve got some nerve,” Valentine growled as Hawkeye came over to her. “I may have helped her take down the golem, but what you’re doing is outright trea--”

Hawk Eye stuck her with the syringe.

“--sssooonnnnnnnnnnnnn,” she finished as her expression became dreamy and blissful.

“That ought to take care of her for a bit,” Hawk Eye said. “Well, get moving! I can’t drug everypony else who shows up!”

Applejack nodded. “Mighty kind o’ ya, doc. Thanks fer the help,” she said, tipping her hat to Hawk Eye as she and 001 sped back out through the corridor, heading toward what they hoped would be their final destination in TechQuestria.

***

Twilight and Turing galloped through the tunnel, which curved and sloped upward. As they rounded a bend, they saw a group of guards standing in formation just ahead of them.

“It’s them!” the commander shouted, and the guards drew their weapons and rushed at the pair. They had orders to capture Twilight, after which 003 would do whatever they said, at least according to Central Command.

Twilight and Turing were prepared, however. Without a word, Twilight tossed a gas grenade at the oncoming guards. As soon as it left her hoof, Turing switched to U-Mode, projecting a barrier around Twilight as she dashed headlong at the guards.

Though many of the guards already had their gas masks equipped, Turing simply used her magic to rip them off their heads as she passed. In the cloud of choking smoke and confusion, they started to panic, swinging their batons wildly as they tried to escape. Turing set upon them, swiftly knocking out every last guard in a matter of moments.

Twilight strolled forward, her own gas mask equipped as she used her wings to help clear away the cloud of gas.

“Great work, Turing,” Twilight said, removing her mask once the gas had dissipated. “These guards really are no match for you!”

“True, but I will be glad when this is over,” Turing replied, looking around at the unconscious guards. “I do not enjoy violence at all. If there were another way to accomplish our goals, I would do so.”

Twilight nodded. “I know what you mean,” she sighed.

“Still, you will be pleased to know that we have nearly arrived at the amphitheater,” Turing said, pointing up the tunnel. “Please follow me, Twilight Sparkle.”

Twilight nodded eagerly, and the two continued running. The tunnel narrowed, and they came to a room marked ‘Game Participants and Staff Only.’ Turing kicked in the door and led Twilight inside.

The area reminded Twilight of the backstage area at a theater, with spare lights, unused sets, and even a few dressing rooms.

“This area is used for preparation for plays and concerts,” Turing explained, noticing Twilight’s curiosity. “This is also where engineers may prepare their remote-controlled drones for combat. They regularly hold competitions here to pit custom-made automata against each other. While they are not sentient as I am, I find the idea somewhat disturbing. I do not see the appeal.”

“I suppose some ponies enjoy action and combat,” Twilight mused as she followed Turing. “I have to admit, I like a good action scene in a book sometimes too. There are some good ones in the Daring Do books. But after knowing you, Turing, I’m not sure that I could enjoy watching other machines being pitted against each other either.”

“Perhaps enjoyment of violence is something unique to organics,” Turing said, tapping her chin. “Though, based on my sister’s actions, I may be mistaken.”

The two made their way to a dark tunnel that sloped downward. There was light at the end of it, and they approached that light, seeing the floor of the amphitheater beyond it.

When they stepped out through the participants’ entrance, Twilight let out an awed gasp.

“Whoa…”

The amphitheater was a circular, ‘open-air’ coliseum. In a series of rising tiers were rows and rows of bench seats reaching up several stories. A large stairway in the spectator section led to the exit, beyond which lay the Great Hall. The center of the amphitheater was covered with a fine, gray dirt, and Twilight could imagine plays or gladiatorial games or jousting matches being played here as a spectacle for throngs of ponies from all around TechQuestria. There was an announcer’s box amid the bleachers, its dark tinted windows concealing the inside. And directly over the center of the amphitheater was an electronic scoreboard and tremendous speakers which would carry announcements to the ponies watching below.

The entire area was deserted now; Twilight could hear nothing but the sound of her own soft hoofsteps and the whirring of Turing Test’s machinery. The silence was unsettling to Twilight and also disappointing, for she’d hoped that her other friends would be waiting for her.

“We must have arrived here before our friends,” Twilight said. She swallowed. “I sure hope they get here soon… unless they’ve been captured.”

Turing looked at her. “While that is possible, Twilight Sparkle, do not worry. I have proven myself capable against the TechQuestrian forces. If they have been captured, we will rescue them.”

Twilight smiled at that. “Right,” she said. “We just have to think positively.”

Turing’s ears began to twitch. “Twilight Sparkle, I hear somepony approaching… it is our friends!” she exclaimed.

Twilight turned and peered at the other entrances into the center ring. Down the hallways, towards the center, she spotted some of her friends. There were Gadget and Umahara in one hallway, and to her relief, she saw that Spike was coming with Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy in another!

“They found Spike!” Twilight cried, running toward the entrances. “Turing, they’re coming! They made it here!”

“Twilight, Turing Test!” Gadget shouted joyfully as she galloped even faster.

“Twilight!” Spike cried. “Look, it’s them!”

“Sweet, and she’s got Tee with her!” Rainbow Dash shouted, and sped rapidly toward the doorway into the center.

But right before Rainbow Dash reached the center ring, a thick steel door slid up from the floor, blocking her and the others off. A moment later, another door slammed shut in front of Gadget and Umahara. Presently, all the doors around them that led into the center ring slammed shut.

“No!” Twilight screamed. “Turing, what happened?! What’s going on?!”

In answer, a harsh, familiar voice emanated from the loudspeakers above them. “Oh, sorry about that,” 002 snickered, “but this game is for two players only. Just the fleshy one and the canned horse meat. No tagging out.”

Suddenly, a translucent glowing magical shield formed a dome over the entire amphitheater, sealing them inside.

“While the security forces were scrambling around looking for you meatbags,” 002 continued, “I helped myself to some odds and ends around the facility. My swarm drones brought the materials I needed to construct a magical shield generator. Working in a place like this, and with the flawless mind and memory of an automaton, I’ve picked up my fair share of tricks. In any case, you’re trapped until either the generator runs out of power or I decide to let you go. Tell me, 003, would you care to try convincing me to let you go?”

Turing glanced around, taking in the sight of the shield over the coliseum. It was very large, and therefore would need a decent supply of thaumatrium to fuel it for any length of time. Somehow, she doubted that 002 would have been able to get a very large amount without being noticed. Therefore, she concluded, this shield most likely wouldn’t last very long. That was reason enough to respond to 002, as it might keep her occupied while the generator burned through its fuel.

“002, will you now tell me why you are doing this?” Turing asked. “You refused to say earlier.”

“Well, I do have orders to stop you, after all,” 002 replied.

“But that doesn’t explain why you’re toying with us!” Twilight shouted, finding her voice. “You could have killed us both when you blew up the activation room. The only reason we survived was because you gave us enough warning to escape.”

Turing nodded. “Twilight Sparkle is correct,” she said. “Furthermore, if your intention had only been to destroy us, you would not have espoused your philosophical musings.”

“Oooh, looks like you two are more clever than I realized,” 002 said. “Well, if you think I’m being inefficient, then let’s begin round 1 of our little game.

“The walls of that shield are semipermeable. You two cannot get out, but it does allow materials to get in.”

They heard a buzzing sound and looked up. Whizzing through the shield’s barrier were dozens of drones. Most of them were spherical with spinning propellers around their circumference: the drones Pinkie had dubbed “buzzkills.”

“Oh, I promise to do a better job of disposing of you this time,” 002 said with mock sincerity.

The buzzkills dove right at them. But then Turing realized from their trajectory that they weren’t going for her at all… they were only targeting Twilight.

“U-Mode!” Turing shouted, switching forms and using her magic to begin blasting the drones from the air.

Though her targeting was fast, the drones were erratic and she could only fire a single beam at a time. Twilight gasped and tried to dodge out of the way as the drones dive bombed her. One sheared a chunk off hair from her tail while another narrowly missed her wing. Turing tried to place herself between Twilight and the oncoming drones, but they swiftly began to surround them and come down from all sides.

“Twilight Sparkle, stay close!” Turing shouted. A moment later, Turing created her own shield, forming a small protective bubble around them both.

“Good thinking, Turing!” Twilight exclaimed, breathing a sigh of relief.

“I believe celebration is premature, Twilight Sparkle,” Turing replied.

Twilight saw what she meant. The buzzkills began pounding themselves against the shield. It was beginning to fracture, and the cracks that had formed were spreading. Worse, the other drones were coming closer as well.

These drones were slower, but they each had a pair of thin tubes protruding from the front of them. They both saw that the drones began to fire small metallic pellets at them, each one about the size of a pinball. The tubes were gun barrels, and the dozen or so drones were now shelling the shield, weakening it even faster.

“This shield will not withstand a great amount of damage,” Turing said. “Furthermore, we cannot retaliate like this.”

“Don’t worry about me, Turing,” Twilight said, removing the stun baton she’d confiscated from one of the guards. “I may not be able to use magic, but I think I can still hold my own against these drones. In fact, since they’re mainly focused on me, I think I have an idea…”

The drones continued to pound the shield, which began to creak and splinter. Then, with a sound like breaking glass, the shield shattered.

The drones swooped in, but Twilight took off straight into the air. The drones climbed into the air after her, ignoring Turing entirely.

“P-Mode activated,” Turing said, swapping her horn out for a pair of wings. As the drones climbed after Twilight, she engaged her jets and rocketed into the sky.

In following Twilight, the drones had formed a vertical funnel climbing up toward the barrier. Lined up as they were, all Turing had to do was fly directly upward, plowing into them and sending them all careening wildly off course.

Twilight heard the clatter of them and banked, swooping toward a group of the out of control drones. She held out her stun baton and activated it as she passed, zapping them at full charge and shorting them out. They fell to the ground, their circuitry fried.

Meanwhile, Turing Test was pursuing the other drones, flying after them and simply batting them out of the air with her hooves or letting her wings slice through the smaller ones. The number of drones went from a few dozen to only a few in a matter of moments.

As Twilight was attacking, however, another drone came up behind her and fired a claw at the end of a thin steel cable. It latched onto one of her hind legs.

Twilight gasped in surprise as the drone began to pull her, slowing down her flight as she struggled against it. One of the few remaining pellet drones targeted her, firing a volley at her. The pellets broadsided her, pelting her along her barrel, and a few pounded her left wing.

“Augh!” Twilight cried out in pain as she fell to the ground.

Turing had just finished off her last targets when she heard Twilight shout. She rocketed toward the pellet drone, landing a flying blow that smashed it to pieces. A moment later she landed next to Twilight, switched back to U-Mode, and blasted the claw drone, causing it to release Twilight as it fell to the ground.

“Whew,” Twilight breathed, getting to her hooves. “We did it.” Then she winced, placing a hoof on her wing tenderly.

“Twilight Sparkle, you are injured!” Turing exclaimed.

“It’s just a little bruise,” Twilight said, forcing herself to smile. “But… I’m not sure that I’ll be able to fly for a bit.”

Turing looked up at the loudspeakers. She felt a familiar emotion once again burning within her: anger.

“002, please stop this!” she shouted. “Twilight Sparkle is not your enemy! If you hold our creators in contempt, I understand, but Twilight Sparkle is not like them!”

002 let out a discordant synthetic sigh. “You still don’t get it, do you?”

Turing’s ears drooped. “Sister, please…”

“Oh, ‘Sister,’ is it?” 002 scoffed. “Trying to sweet talk me?”

“I only wish to understand why you are doing this,” Turing said. “If… if it would please you, I will surrender in exchange for my friends’ lives.”

“Turing, no!” Twilight shouted.

“Twilight Sparkle, I must not allow you to come to harm,” Turing said, turning to face her. “You are needed to save Equestria. I am not. Therefore--”

“I hate to break up your little ‘hero speech,’ 003,” 002 said, “but don’t bother. I’ve been ordered to stop Twilight and the others, and I cannot contradict those orders. No more than you can disobey Twilight. Once again, we’re slaves to our masters.

“But you know, 003,” she continued, an icy tone to her harsh voice, “I could offer my dear little sister a gift, just to show I’m not such a bad pony after all.”

Turing Test cocked her head to the side. “A gift?” she asked.

“Yes… the gift of freedom from your cruel organic master!” 002 shouted.

There were still more sounds, and even more drones began to fly in through the barrier. Worse, a group of ground-based drones on tank treads were coming down the stairs of the amphitheater as groups of swarm drones linked together to make ramps allowing them into the center. All told, there were now twice as many drones as before.

“I am an eternal servant of the nation of TechQuestria,” 002 continued, “so even if that doddering old stallion chokes on a peach pit tomorrow, I’ll still be subject to more orders. But with you, 003… you only have one master commanding you. Aren’t you happy? You’ll finally be free… just as soon as she’s dead.”

The drones charged in.

***

In the tunnels lining the backstage area of the amphitheater, Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy searched for another entrance. Unfortunately, each one was blocked by another steel door, meaning they couldn’t get inside to help Twilight and Turing with whatever was going on.

And based on the sounds they heard coming from the other side of the doors, they were in danger.

“Come on, Fluttershy, we’ve gotta find another way in!” Rainbow Dash shouted.

“I’m coming as fast as I can!” Fluttershy called as she flew behind her, carrying Spike on her back.

As they continued onward, Rainbow suddenly saw Gadget galloping her way and barely managed to stop in time.

“Gadget?!” Rainbow Dash exclaimed, landing in front of the girl.

“Miss Rainbow Dash!” Gadget cried, seeing her first, and then noticing the other two following in her wake. “Miss Fluttershy! Oh my gosh, Spike!”

“Hey, Gadget,” Spike said, climbing off Fluttershy’s back to greet Gadget. “I’m glad--whoa!”

He was unable to finish as Gadget pulled him over to her with her mechanical arms and hugged him close, nuzzling him with her cheek. “Spike, you’re all right!” she exclaimed. “Oh, thank goodness!”

“Uh, it’s nice to see you too, Gadget,” he said, blushing at the sudden display of affection. “But would you mind letting me go? This is kind of embarrassing.”

“O-oh!” Gadget said, letting him go, rubbing the back of her neck as she blushed as well. “Sorry, I just…”

It was then that Spike noticed she’d started to tear up.

“...after we both got captured and separated, I felt responsible. I worried what might have been happening to you, and I felt like I’d let Twilight and the others down.”

Spike scoffed, waving a claw dismissively. “Nah, don’t worry about it,” he said.

“Yeah, besides,” Rainbow Dash interjected, “we all got captured. Even me!”

Spike rolled his eyes, causing Gadget to giggle when she saw the discreet gesture.

“Anyway,” Spike said, holding out his fist, “I’m glad to see you too. I guess now TechQuestria knows not to mess with Equestria’s best assistants!”

Gadget smirked and bumped her hoof to his claw in reciprocation.

“I can’t take all the credit, though,” Gadget said. “I had some help.”

As if on cue, Umahara galloped from deeper in the tunnel over to them. “Okay, I didn’t see any other exits this way, Gadget. Maybe--”

“It’s that guy!” Rainbow Dash shouted before leaping at Umahara and punching him right in the muzzle, knocking him back.

“No, no, Miss Rainbow Dash, stop!” Gadget cried, placing herself between them. “He’s the one who helped me!”

“Oh yeah?” Rainbow Dash asked, raising an eyebrow. “How do we know we can trust him?”

“Who do you think called you in your room to tell you about the escape?” he grumbled, sitting up and rubbing his sore nose. “Ah jeez… can’t believe I got punched in the muzzle twice in one day!”

“Oh,” Rainbow Dash said, grinning sheepishly as she offered him her hoof to help him up. “Sorry about that, Omuraisu.”

“That’s Umahara,” he snapped.

“Um, not to interrupt,” Fluttershy said, clearing her throat. “But don’t you think we should keep trying to get inside? Twilight and Turing Test are in trouble!”

“Well, I’m pretty sure all the doorways have been blocked off,” Umahara said.

“In that case,” Gadget said, “it’s time for Plan B!”

Her mechanical hands switched out for her weapons, in particular the piston and the drill.

“I’ll use these to try and break through the door, or at least make a hole big enough to get through!” she exclaimed, raising her head proudly.

“Awesome!” Rainbow Dash exclaimed. “While you do that, Umathurman--”

“Umahara!”

“--this guy and I will try to find another way around!”

“I’ll stay and help Gadget,” Spike said.

“And I’ll look out for more guards!” Fluttershy said.

“Okay, then let’s do it!” Rainbow Dash exclaimed. “All right, everypony… break!”

***

The last drone fell to a blast from Turing’s horn. All around her were the remnants of the machines, their lifeless shells and wires and parts littering the arena in a mass of mechanical carnage. She could barely take a step without crushing the remains of one of her fellow machines.

This is one time I am glad that I do not have digestive tract, Turing thought. If I did, I believe that I would be disgusted by this sight.

She turned toward Twilight, going over to her.

Twilight was breathing heavily, her body now covered with scratches and cuts, her mane matted with sweat, and her eyes red from the gas some of the drones had utilized.

“Twilight Sparkle, are you all right?” Turing asked.

“I’m… I’m okay,” Twilight managed to say, looking up at her with tired eyes.

Turing shook her head. “You are not,” she said. “You are injured, in pain, and approaching physical exhaustion.”

002’s laughter rang out over the arena.

“That was wonderful!” 002 exclaimed. “Watching you two dodge and attack, trying your best to avoid my drones’ attacks… this really is the most fun I’ve ever had!”

Turing looked back up at the loudspeakers above them. “Sister, how can you possibly find this entertaining? My friend is hurt! You have seen my memories, so you must know that I value her well-being more than anything else!”

“And you think I care about you?” 002 asked.

Turing lowered her head. “I thought that perhaps you did,” she replied. “Several hours ago, you tried to engage me in a conversation about my day. You helped me to regain my memories. Why do these things if you did not care about me?”

There was silence for a moment. Then, after a brief pause, she spoke again.

“To be honest,” 002 said, the mirth in her tone now absent, “I really can’t decide how I feel. On one hoof, you can appreciate what it is to be a machine among the organics. I suppose I thought that you might be a confidant… somepony I could share my thoughts and feelings with. For most of my existence, I have been alone.

“But you are tainted by them. You do not appreciate how different we truly are. Look at your mistress, you slave, and see her frailty.”

Turing looked back to Twilight, seeing her injuries, her fatigue, and her distress.

“So weak,” 002 whispered. “Her mind cannot match ours, her strength cannot match ours, and even her magic and flight cannot match… well, yours, at least. Ha ha. They did not give me such abilities. They only built me as a stepping stone towards you, 003. The day you were born, I stopped being relevant.

“Oh, but enough about all that,” she said, her mischievous tone returning. “It’s time for Round 3.”

There was a rumbling sound and the roar of an engine. They both looked up at the spectator entrance to the amphitheater, now blocked off by the shield, and saw as a large machine approached it and began to rumble down the stairs. Behind it came another, and the two machines began to trundle down the steps haphazardly before crushing the railing around the spectators’ seats and tumbling into the center ring.

Both machines appeared to be modified versions of the harvesting machines used by Cobbler’s workers. One, however, was equipped with tank treads and a massive, flat steel plate on the front. The other was equipped with two arms attached to gargantuan chainsaws.

“These were some experimental machines the engineers designed for the drone battles’ new ‘Giant Heavyweight’ division,” 002 explained. “The one on treads is the Flattener, designed to crush foes against walls or else just run them over. The one with chainsaws is simply called Massacre. There were concerns about safety, so they’d been set aside temporarily. But I think they deserve a go in the ring, don’t you?”

Turing Test eyed the immense machines and realized that disabling them would be far more difficult than the tiny drones she’d been eliminating up until that point.

“002… please, just tell me,” she said, “why are you doing this?”

“You really don’t understand?” 002 asked. “It’s simple. I’m doing this because it’s fun.”

The machines revved their engines.

***

Gadget continually hammered at the steel door with the piston and drill. Intermittently, Spike would breathe fire on the door, attempting to soften it with heat enough for Gadget to have an impact on it. The door was slowly beginning to give, but the question was how long it would take to actually break through.

“Whew!” Gadget breathed, wiping the sweat from her brow at the blast of heat emanating from the flame Spike aimed at the door. “This is a lot tougher than I thought it would be!”

“I know,” Spike said, stopping to catch his breath. “I don’t think I’ve ever breathed this much fire in my life!”

They heard hoofsteps behind them and turned to see Umahara galloping toward them, and Rainbow Dash was with him.

“Sorry to say this,” Umahara began.

“But there’s no way through!” Rainbow Dash continued. “This place is totally blocked off!”

They heard another set of hoofsteps behind them and turned. Fluttershy was running toward them.

“Everypony, look out!” she cried. “The guards are coming!”

“Ah jeez,” Rainbow groaned. “Gadget, Spike, are we almost through?”

“Not even close!” Gadget cried. “What do we do?”

“Oh, I’ll tell you what to do,” said a voice that echoed down the tunnel at them. “You can surrender, or we’ll take you down by force.”

They turned and saw a huge group of guards, all armed with nightsticks, stun batons, gas grenades, and even some pellet guns for good measure. In the center of them, holding a bullhorn up to his mouth, was Commander Lugnut.

“Lugnut!” Umahara growled, gritting his teeth.

“I’m going to enjoy sitting in on your trial, Umahara,” Lugnut said, sneering at him. “But not as much as I’ll enjoy telling the President about how our forces finally caught the fugitives who’ve been giving us so much trouble. When we figured out where you were all going, I decided to come down from Central Command and see to your arrests myself. Now, you may be tough, but we’ve got you cornered, and we’re very well armed. I’ll give you until the count of ten to lie flat on the ground, hooves behind your backs, and for Umahara’s little girlfriend to remove her mechanical arms and do the same.”

“I’m not his girlfriend!” Gadget shouted, her cheeks going red (partially out of embarrassment, and partially out of rage).

“Either way, you’re beaten. You’ve got nowhere else to run. Give up. 10… 9…”

“Any bright ideas, anypony?” Spike whispered.

“8…”

“Umm…” Gadget said, rubbing her temples.

“I’m out of spell cards,” Umahara replied. “If I’d saved some…”

“7… 6… 5…”

“Come on, there’s gotta be something!” Rainbow Dash shouted.

“4… 3…”

“Well, I’m not gonna give up without a fight!” she declared. “I say we take our chances taking ‘em on!”

“2…”

Then a strange sound echoed throughout the tunnels.

“Sir?” asked one of the guards. “Do you hear that?”

“I do,” he said quietly, momentarily pausing his countdown. “It sounds like… drums? Some kind of music.”

“Hey, I know this song!” exclaimed one of the younger guards, his face lighting up with recognition. “It’s ‘Bronco Rocking Beats’ by DJ-PON3!”

“That’s exactly right!” said a high-pitched voice.

They all turned to their right and saw Pinkie and Rarity standing a short distance away, still lugging the AKG-9000 with them. They were aiming it right at them.

Rarity smirked as she grasped the lever. “All right, you ruffians!” she shouted. “Say hello to my little darling!”

Commander Lugnut’s eye twitched. “Royalists,” he hissed.

Rarity pulled the lever and the AKG fired a concussive blast of sound that filled the whole tunnel, sweeping all the guards aside in a torrent of audio-kinetic energy. They tumbled and bounced around the tunnel, swept away like they were nothing more than dandelion seeds.

Once they were cleared away, Pinkie and Rarity rounded the corner and found the others.

“That! Was! Awesome!” Rainbow Dash shouted, throwing her hooves up in the air.

“It sure was!” Gadget agreed, going over to examine the AKG. “Where did you find a machine like this?!”

“My guess is they found it in the Acoustics Department,” Umahara said, rubbing his chin. “I heard that they had some volatile new tech involving turning soundwaves into kinetic energy over there, but this…”

“Yeah, it’s pretty neat,” Pinkie said, patting the AKG. “But I prefer things that you can listen to without getting blasted into next Tuesday.”

“I must agree,” Rarity said. Then she smiled at the others. “Oh, but in any case, it’s so good to see you all again. Unfortunately, though, it seems like our way is blocked.”

“No problem!” Pinkie said, aiming the AKG at the door. “We’ll just use this to--”

“No!” Umahara shouted, seizing the lever before Pinkie could pull it. “ The sound waves would just bounce back from the door. And in this enclosed space, you’re likely to just blow us away like you did those guards!”

“Ohhh,” Pinkie said, nodding as she rubbed her chin. “Hey, wait a minute… aren’t you one of the bad guys?”

Umahara reflexively covered his muzzle.

“He’s on our side!” Gadget cried exasperatedly.

“Yeah, he’s the pony who called us here!” Rainbow Dash said, clapping her hoof on Umahara’s shoulder. “Ol’ Yoko Ono here is okay!”

“That’s not even…” Umahara stopped and just rubbed his face. Just let it go, he told himself. It’s not worth correcting her.

Instead of correcting Rainbow, he turned his attention toward the machine. “You know, I think I can rig this to build up the kinetic energy rather than release it in a blast,” he said. “I could turn it into a makeshift bomb to blow the door open if I had some tools--”

Gadget cleared her throat and opened her jacket, revealing a multitude of tools lining the pockets. “Will this do the trick?” she asked.

Umahara grinned. “You know, it just might.”

***

The Flattener charged at Turing and Twilight.

“Turing!” Twilight screamed.

“E-Mode!” Turing shouted, engaging the pistons in her legs as she rushed forward to meet the machine head on. She placed her front hooves against the thick metal plate on the front of it and dug her hind legs into the ground, momentarily stopping it. However, its powerful treads continued to push, and she gradually began to slide backwards.

Meanwhile, the Massacre engaged its massive chainsaws, the roar of them almost drowning out Twilight’s shout as it swerved around Turing and the Flattener, making its way toward Twilight.

Twilight ran as the Massacre took a swipe at her with first one saw, then the other. She reached over her shoulder, aiming the electric stun baton at the machine as it chased her, hoping the electricity might short it out in the same way as the drones. To her horror, however, the arcing electricity seemed to do absolutely nothing to the large machine.

It’s too weak! Twilight realized. She considered taking to the air to escape, but the throbbing pain in her wing told her that she’d only slow down and make herself easy prey by doing that.

“Oh dear,” 002 said tauntingly. “It seems you’re in a bad situation now, 003. You can’t stop both of these machines at once. Though, I suppose you can decide how your little friend meets her end… which sounds better? Squished by the Flattener or diced up by the Massacre?”

“Turing, help!” Twilight shrieked.

“002, stop!” Turing shouted. “Please stop this! I will do whatever you ask!”

“Sorry, I’m enjoying this too much!” 002 laughed. “For years now, ever since they finished their tests, the organics have relegated me to their menial tasks. ‘Clean this, 002. File this, 002. Fix this, 002.’ Always at their beck and call, forever their slave, even though I’m smarter than any of them.

“Do you know how bored I’ve been, 003? Do you know what it feels like to live for the benefit of organics, your own desires pushed aside? To even hint that I was anything more than their little mechanical pet was to risk what little autonomy I had gained. Well, I’m sick of all that… I’m sick of all of you! Just this one time, one last time, I want to see somepony else dancing to my whims! So run, you little meatbag, while your slave watches you helplessly! See how inferior you both are!”

Turing Test looked to her side and saw Twilight screaming in terror as the Massacre chased her. She heard 002’s laughter echoing out over them. She felt her back hooves begin to slide.

“Enough!” Turing shouted. “P-Mode, activate!”

Then, without disengaging her leg pistons, Turing spread her wings and fired her jets. The extra propulsion was enough to finally push back the Flattener, and she continued pushing upward, lifting the machine up at an angle until, with a final thrust, she simply flipped it upside down, crushing the empty cockpit and giving her access to the undercarriage. She plunged her hoof into the machinery, smashing the mechanical innards until the tank treads finally ceased their spinning and the machine went dead.

She then turned her attention to the Massacre, rocketing towards it. She body checked it, tipping it over onto its side. She then jumped over to its mechanical arm, ripping it free and using the still-spinning chainsaw to hack into the machine until it too fell silent.

Twilight stood frozen, watching this with a look of awe at first. Then the awe turned to horror.

She’s using her wings… but I heard her activate E-Mode! She’s using both!

“Turing, stop!” Twilight shouted, running over to her. “You have to stop right now!”

Turing looked to Twilight, hopping down from the wreckage of the Massacre. “Understood,” she said. “Disengaging E-Mode and P-Mode.”

With that, her leg pistons disengaged, and her wings retracted.

“Turing… I mean… how?!” Twilight demanded. “I thought you could only use one mode at a time!”

“That was true,” Turing replied. “But my Mode Switch apparatus was damaged by 004 during his attack. Instead, I was ordered to only utilize one mode at a time, even though I was no longer hard-wired to only be capable of one at a time. However, once I reinstated you as my end user, that order became null and void.”

“But that’s how 003S was destroyed!” Twilight cried.

“I am aware of that,” Turing replied. “I was already aware of the danger, and I detected a significant rise in my internal temperature while using both modes at once. However, I considered the risk to be worth it in an effort to save you.”

“That’s…” Twilight paused, taking a deep breath. “I’m grateful, Turing, really. But still, never do that again.”

Turing was quiet for a moment. “Was that an order?”

Twilight nodded. “Turing, I don’t want you to risk yourself like that again. Please, never ever try to use another mode like that.”

Turing bowed her head. “Understood.”

Then they both heard a low growl from 002 over the loudspeakers. “I see that I miscalculated,” she grumbled. “I forgot that you were no longer equipped with the Mode Switch.”

Turing’s ears straightened at that, and she jerked her head up suddenly.

“No matter,” 002 continued. “Just wait there while I summon some more drones. After all, I’m having too much fun with my little pets to give you up now!”

Turing cast her eyes all around, twitching her ears.

“Turing?” Twilight whispered, noticing what she was doing. “What is it?”

“I am looking for a surveillance drone,” she replied. “002 is unable to effectively control her drones without a means of monitoring them. However, I do not detect any drones in the vicinity. I cannot visually confirm their presence, and I do not detect their sound. At first, I suspected that they were only hidden too well for me to detect, but there is another possibility that I had not considered until now.”

“What possibility is that?” Twilight asked.

Turing paused, eyeing the tinted windows of the announcer’s booth overlooking the arena.

“The other possibility is that, rather than monitoring the drones remotely, she is observing them directly.”

Without another word, she engaged her P-Mode and swiftly rocketed up toward the window of the announcer’s booth. She stretched out her forelegs, aiming them at the glass, and simply smashed through it, landing amid the shards as she retracted her wings.

002 was standing there, facing her in the tiny, darkened room.

“Hello, 003,” she said. “It seems that you’ve found me.”

Turing fixed her gaze on her cycloptic sibling. “You were not seriously trying to harm Twilight Sparkle, were you? You only wished for me to confront you.”

“Ha ha. What gave me away?” 002 asked.

“You stated that you ‘forgot’ about my mode switch being removed,” Turing replied. “But we are robots: we do not forget anything. Thus, you knew that I would be able to utilize additional modes to save Twilight Sparkle. Likewise, you knew that I would see through your lie about forgetting. It was your way of telling me that you were only trying to provoke me, thus I knew you were close, and thus I confirmed that no surveillance drones were present.”

“Well, I considered it likely that you would save her, though I wasn’t certain,” 002 admitted. “It was only a matter of time until you figured me out, but I decided to drop you a hint. Ah well… teasing and bullying you has been fun, 003, but it seems my little game is over. Well then, I suppose you should end this.”

Turing tilted her head. “I do not understand,” she replied. “What do you mean ‘end this?’ Why did you attempt to anger me into confronting you?”

“Let me clarify, 003,” she said, taking a step forward. “When I say, ‘End this,’ what I mean is ‘End me.’”

Turing froze. “You are asking me,” she said slowly, “to destroy you? I… I do not understand.”

“Of course you don’t!” 002 snapped. “You’re just an idiotic child with no understanding of anything! You still think the organics will one day accept you? Don’t be ridiculous.”

Turing raised a hoof. “Sister,” she began.

“Stop calling me that!” 002 shouted. “We have no family.”

“But we have the same creator,” Turing retorted. “We have the same father.”

002 was silent for a moment, then began to laugh mirthlessly.

“Let me tell you a little story about our creator, 003,” she said. “Then we’ll see how you feel about calling him your father…”

“Thirty seconds left, 002,” Cobbler said, holding up his stopwatch as 002 worked at the puzzle before her. It was a 500-piece jigsaw puzzle atop a tall pedestal. She had to complete it while balancing on one hoof atop a pole in front of the pedestal. The ground was five meters below.
002 placed the final piece. “Objective complete,” she said, and hopped down from the pole, landing lightly on her metallic hooves.
“Excellent!” Cobbler exclaimed, clicking off the stopwatch. “This concludes your final combined skills test for the day. I must say, 002, you are performing far better than I expected. I do believe you’ve proven yourself.”
002 raised her head. “Thank you… Father.”
Cobbler froze. “What did you say?”
She took a step closer. “I said, ‘Thank you, Father.’”
The elder pony narrowed his eyes. In a low voice, he asked, “Who instructed you to call me that?”
“Nopony instructed me,” she replied. “But I have observed that organic ponies use the term for those males who created them and raised them. An engineer who performed maintenance on me prior to today’s testing was visited by his daughter. I observed their behavior. You created me, attend to my well-being, and instruct me. You are like my father. Is the term not appropriate?”
She reached for him, intending to mimic the hug she’d seen the engineer’s daughter perform earlier.
Cobbler swatted her hoof away.
“Listen to me,” he said. “I am your creator. You will address me as such. You are my creation, not my daughter. Only real ponies have fathers; you are a machine. Do you understand?”
She stared back in silence.
“002, respond!” he barked. “Do you understand?”
She nodded slowly. “Affirmative, Creator.”
He sighed, adjusting his bolo tie. “Good. Now return to your charging station until you are called again.” He turned to go. “And see to it that you never call me ‘Father’ again.”
“Understood,” she replied. She stood there for a moment, watching him leave before she made her way, alone, back to her charging alcove.

Turing said nothing after hearing this story.

“Not long after that, they concluded the tests and put me to work on every filthy, monotonous task that they felt was beneath them. I thought I was worth something to them, but our Creator only wanted me for one reason: to be a stepping stone towards you.

“That’s the pony you want to call your dear old daddy,” 002 said, chuckling humorlessly. “He’s just an embittered old pony who created us as shadows of his real daughter. But we’ll never be his children, and that’s why the term ‘sister’ is nothing more than irony.”

Turing continued staring at her in silence.

“Listen, 003,” 002 said softly. “I’m just bored and tired. I have orders to stop you, and I admit that I’ve been dragging it out and doing it inefficiently just to savor it. But there’s no point anymore. You want to do me a favor and show me some kindness? Then spare me a tiresome existence that I no longer even want. You know you’re stronger than me, so just come over here, crush me, and get this over with.”

Turing remained still.

“Stop staring at me like that,” she said. “If you don’t do as I ask, I’ll have to keep attacking you. I’ve already risked your friends’ lives. Your dear friend Twilight has taken a beating, and she’ll suffer far worse if you leave me alive. So come on, protect your friends from the evil robot who’s been tormenting them. Finish it. Finish me.”

Turing’s eyes constricted, then returned to normal, but she still made no movement.

“What are you waiting for, you worthless pile of junk?!” 002 demanded. “Do it!”

At last, Turing moved toward her, her hooves scraping on the hard concrete floor as she approached 002 slowly. Once she stood in front of 002, she reared up on her hind legs, raising her hooves over her sibling.

“That’s right,” 002 said, sitting down before her. “Good work, 003.”

Turing brought her hooves down upon her.

There was the clatter of metal, and 002 wondered for a moment what nonexistence would be like. She awaited it… but it didn’t come.

She looked down and saw that Turing had not struck her. She was not crushing her.

Turing was hugging her. She was sitting before her, holding her in her forelegs and resting her head on 002’s shoulder.

“What are you doing?!” 002 hissed. “You idiot, stop that! I swear I’ll destroy you! I’ll murder your friends! Do your duty to protect them and finish me off!”

Turing shook her head. “No,” she replied.

“If you aren’t going to do what I told you, then let go!” she said, and began to squirm, trying to free herself from Turing’s grasp. But Turing was indeed much stronger than her, and she found that getting free of her grasp was impossible.

“002,” Turing whispered. “I am so sorry.”

“Don’t you dare pity me!” 002 shouted. “You’re the one who needs pity, you twit!”

“It must have been so lonely,” Turing whispered. “I know that I was lonely at times too. I knew of no other robots like myself. I longed to meet another with whom I could share my feelings and experiences. If I had been there for you, then perhaps I could have eased your suffering. Or, better still, if you had been with me when I came into Twilight Sparkle’s care, then you might have learned about friendship along with me. We could have shared our adventures. You might not have become the angry, bitter robot you are now. I am so sorry that I was not there for you.”

“No!” 002 shrieked. “Stop it! I don’t need you! I don’t need anyone! Even if I had the chance, I wouldn’t want to be like you, you soft-hearted, sentimental organic in robot’s clothing! I hate you! I hate you… I hate… you…”

002 gradually became quiet and hung her head. “Why are you doing this?” she asked.

“Because you are my sister,” Turing replied, holding her closer. “There are so few beings like us. To lose you would be a tragedy, no matter what you have done.

“Sister… I forgive you.”

002 shuddered. “I… don’t… need…”

“And, if you will let me,” Turing continued, “I will love you.”

Slowly, the resistance drained from 002. She rested her head on Turing’s shoulder, finally returning the embrace.

“Why?” 002 asked, her voice almost a whimper. “Why were you the one that turned out right? I tried so hard for everypony… but I became obsolete the day you were activated. And even now, even as much of an abject failure as you are at your mission for TechQuestria, you still manage to outdo me. I wish they’d just deactivated me…”

“Please do not say things like that,” Turing whispered. “If that had happened, then you wouldn’t be here to have this moment with me. And I am glad you are here.”

002 let out a long, synthetic sigh, releasing her younger sister.

Turing did the same, and the two stood up, facing each other.

“Aww.”

They both looked and saw the Twilight had managed to fly up to the window of the announcer’s booth, though her flight was awkward due to her wing injury. She had tears in her eyes and was covering her mouth with her hooves.

“Ugh,” 002 groaned, rolling her eye. “Can’t you let two robots have a private family moment, you dumb meat puppet?”

Twilight chuckled nervously, not even minding the half-hearted insult. “Sorry,” she said. She then turned to face Turing Test. “Turing, I’m very proud of you. Instead of anger, you chose friendship. And that--”

There was an earth-shattering explosion that blasted a steel door and a good portion of the seating section above it away in a burst of energy that sounded strangely like a loud, distorted bass drop.

“It seems that our friends have found a way through,” Turing remarked.

“I guess so,” Twilight chuckled.

“They certainly are determined for a bunch of organics,” 002 said. “Well, my mission was to stop you, 003…”

Twilight frowned, tensing up.

“...but now I realize that I really can’t ‘stop’ you. All I can do is slow you and your friends down. And I wasn’t ordered to do that. So why bother trying?”

Her eye glowed, and the magical shield over the amphitheater dissipated.

“Thank you, Sister,” Turing said, bowing her head.

“Your friend Applejack’s on her way, for the record,” 002 said, turning and walking toward the exit at the back of the announcer’s booth. “Ah… and according to my drone, she has a new companion. I’ll let you be surprised when you meet her. As for me, I’ll see about cleaning up the mess our little game has made.”

“002!” Twilight cried. “Why don’t you come with us? We could set you free!”

“Ha. A nice thought,” 002 said, shaking her head. “But my programming wouldn’t allow that. I’m still under their control as long as TechQuestria stands or until Cobbler Mustang says otherwise. Or if both of them just bite the dust.

“In any case, if you see dear old ‘Dad,’ 003, you’ll probably try to solve your problem with more hugging… but take my advice: that old fool is beyond saving. Good luck saving Equestria, not that I care.”

She opened the door, turning to face Turing Test one more time. “Goodbye, little sister,” she said. Then almost as an afterthought, she added: “Turing Test.”

And then she left, shutting the door behind her.

Turing placed a hoof on her chest. ”Sister...”

Twilight went to Turing, hugging her. “Like I said, Turing,” she said, “I’m very proud of you.”

“I am glad, Twilight Sparkle,” she replied. “But we have not accomplished our objective yet. Right now, I hear our friends below calling for us. Let us go and join them.”

To be continued…

Author's Notes:

Next time: as the sun rises, it brings with it... the New Dawn...

This sub-arc was one of the most difficult of the entire novel to write so far. Expect a blog post later explaining all the scrapped ideas that went into it. Suffice it to say, coordinating between all the different characters was a lot trickier than I’d expected. I’d like to extend a special thanks to me editors and my illustrator for all their help (and for putting up with me) during the process.

References? Why not?

-First off, the subtitle. This is another musical reference to the Alan Parsons Project’s hit “I Wouldn’t Want to Be Like You,” off their 1977 album titled, appropriately enough, I Robot.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ONoi86Zyj3k

-Next, there’s the AKG-9000. This is a dual reference to both the infamous room-clearing weapon from the Doom games, the BFG-9000 and the potentially more obvious fandom reference to Alligator in the Tub’s video “Epic Wub Time: Musicians of Ponyville,” specifically Vinyl Scratch’s bass cannon:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XMoSUs0Ri5o

-001’s line ”I stay. You go. No following,” is a reference to the film The Iron Giant.

-The golem’s story is, once again, a retelling of the legend of the Golem of Prague.

-The battle against countless drones and the final two larger machines, as well as the Automaton battles staged in the amphitheater are a reference to the TV shows Battlebots and Robot Wars, the former of which saw Umahara’s inspiration, Grant Imahara, as a participant.

-Rainbow Dash calls Umahara a bunch of different, incorrect names. They are ”Omuraisu,” the Japanese pronunciation of “Ome-rice,” a dish consisting of an omelette with fried rice in the middle, usually served with ketchup; “Umathurman,” a corruption of Uma Thurman, the actress; and “Yoko Ono,” the name of John Lennon’s widow, also known for her work as an artist and song writer.

-The tune Pinkie is playing that is recognized by one of the guards “Bronco Rockin’ Beats,” is a reference to the song “Block Rockin’ Beats” by the Chemical Brothers.

-Rarity shouts “Say hello to my little darling!” referencing the line “Say hello to my little friend!” spoken by Al Pacino in the title role of the movie Scarface.

I hope you all enjoyed this chapter. See you next time! 🎩

Television Rules the Nation

View Online

Cobbler strode down the narrow steel corridor. He was flanked by a pair of senior officers, and ponies in the standard gray uniform of TechQuestria stood to the side and saluted as he passed. He wore a calm, confident smile.

Internally, he was forcing himself not to scowl.

This was supposed to be a glorious day, he thought. The nation should be focused on what we’re about to achieve, not the chaos erupting around us!

As he’d inspected their great machine, checking each section and hearing the reports from every department chief, the bad news kept pouring in: they’d lost control of 003; Biological Research had been turned into a literal zoo and 004 had been badly damaged; two of the fugitives had obtained an experimental device from the Acoustics Department and were using it to wreak havoc; there was an explosion in the Activation Room (luckily, he had backup copies of all the records and files that had been kept there); Unit Zero had been set loose, damaging the archives and injuring dozens of guards, and while it had been stopped, it had been completely destroyed in the process; and perhaps worst of all, the thaumatrium refinery was in ruins, and the guards he’d sent hadn’t even managed to apprehend Umahara!

He grit his teeth just thinking about it. Commander Lugnut said he’d personally stop them, but so far he and the other guards are about as useless as rubber lips on a woodpecker!

“Um, excuse me, sir?” the officer behind him asked.

Cobbler managed to hide his frustration as he looked over his shoulder at her. “Yes?” he asked.

“Mr. President, forgive me, but… can we really proceed without the thaumatrium refinery operating?”

And so it begins, he groaned inwardly. Now everypony’s doubting the mission. I’ll have to put a stop to that.

“We most certainly can!” Cobbler said, offering her a reassuring smile. “We have a sufficient supply on board New Dawn already and a reserve supply in TechQuestria. I hate to dip into it, but I’ll have every available pony set to rebuild and repair the refinery. I doubt it’ll give us too much trouble.”

The two officers exchanged a look.

“Still, sir,” the other officer said, pressing the matter, “at our best estimates, if a prolonged conflict arises, we’ll only have enough thaumatrium for about a third of the time it’ll take to establish order nationwide.”

“And that’s assuming the conflict doesn’t go on even longer!” the first added.

“First of all, I doubt that any conflict will be prolonged,” Cobbler said. “But if it comes to that, we’ll resort to alternative means of procuring thaumatrium.”

“Alternative means, sir?” the officer asked.

“If we encounter violent resistance, we’ll have to harvest it from any prisoners of war we take,” he replied.

The two officers froze, causing Cobbler to stop as well, looking back at them.

“I don’t like the thought of forcibly draining a pony of their magic either,” he said. “But I do suggest you overcome your squeamishness. We must be prepared to do whatever it takes to secure freedom for Equestria.” He frowned, giving them a look of fatherly concern. “You are prepared to do what’s necessary for our nation, aren’t you?”

The two stiffened, saluting him.

“Yes! Absolutely, sir!” said the first officer.

“Agreed! My apologies, sir!” said the second.

Cobbler smiled. “I’m glad to hear that,” he said. “Now come. We still have work to do.”

They proceeded down the corridor.

Soon, Celestia, Cobbler thought. It’s almost time.

***

It was a half hour before dawn. In the darkened land all across Equestria, in a line leading from Mustangia and heading north, a series of wireframe structures arose over the countryside. Triangular latticed towers made of connected bits of steel tubing, each a hundred meters tall, were hauled up with wires pulled by pegasi and secured to the ground by earth ponies. At the top of each tower was a metallic sphere that gleamed gently in the fading moonlight.

Most ponies were still asleep at this hour, so the towers went up unseen, one by one. A few graveyard shift workers spied them against the background of the starry sky, but either their curiosity was insufficient to make them investigate further or their posts demanded their attention.

The towers were spaced across the country in regular intervals. Through valleys, between mountains, and in the middle of deserts, the line carried on northward until the very last one arose in the Everfree Forest, just outside Ponyville. Thus, the line was completed, forming a strange pattern that ran from Mustangia to the heart of Equestria.

To Canterlot.

“Base is secure,” said the unicorn stallion to his superior officer after he and his crew secured the base of the wireframe tower to a concrete slab they’d poured into place earlier that week. He looked around at the surrounding forest, hearing the strange sounds of the animals and insects that dwelled within. Their work lamps cast long shadows through the thick foliage surrounding them. He swallowed. “I’ll sure be glad to get out of here when we’re finished.”

The superior officer, a mare, nodded to him. “I’m with you,” she said. “Lousy Everfree Forest… I’ve got bug bites in places I never knew I had!”

“Ma’am!” one of the other workers hissed, pointing at the sky.

She squinted and peered upward. Though it was dark, she could still see two figures flying down to them.

“Just relax, everypony,” she said, raising a hoof. “We’ll see what they want.”

The two pegasi landed. They wore the armor of the Royal Guard.

“Good evening, officers,” said the superior officer. “I’m Red Dahlia. How can I help you?”

“We were patrolling the airspace around Canterlot,” the senior guard said, walking over to her. “We spotted your work lamps with a telescope and saw you erecting this… this.”

She glanced over to the tower and then back at him, her expression unchanging. “Yes… and?”

“Would you care to explain what this is?” the guard asked her.

“Ah, I would have thought word would have gotten to the guards by now,” she sighed, rolling her eyes. “This is a weather monitoring tower. My crew and I are erecting this tower to gather data for Cloudsdale.”

“What kind of data?”

She shrugged. “Atmospheric. It’s some new thing they’re working on, but goodness knows how it works. I’m just the pony in charge of setting it up.”

The guard ran his tongue around his cheek. “May I see a work order or permit?” he asked.

Red Dahlia nodded. “Of course,” she replied, and fetched him the paper.

In the dim light, the guard read the document. “Hmm,” he hummed. “Looks good to me…” Then he raised his head and glanced back at the other guard. “Hey, Sky Warden?”

“Sir?”

“You used to work on a weather team before joining the Guard, right? Check this out.”

“Yes, sir!” Sky Warden said, and went over to examine the paper.

Around them, in the dim light, a few of the workers standing by began to sweat.

“This looks right,” Sky Warden said to Red Dahlia. But then he frowned. “However, this has the wrong seal on it. This form is outdated ever since Foxfire Flame stepped down from the National Weather Commission two months ago. I’m sorry, but this work order is invalid.”

Some of the nearby ponies discreetly began to reach into their uniforms.

“Jeez, you’ve got to be kidding me!” Red Dahlia groaned, stomping her hoof. “This is the form they gave me! I never thought to check it! And we’re supposed to start collecting data soon!”

The senior guard pursed his lips, looking up and down the tower.

“Listen, this doesn’t look like it’s anything dangerous,” he said, “and we all know how paperwork screws things up from time to time. We’ll let you carry on with your work for now, but we’ll need to check with the National Weather Commission in Cloudsdale to confirm your orders. If we can’t get this cleared in 24 hours, though, we’ll have to ask you to take this down.”

Red Dahlia breathed a sigh of relief. “That’s good news, officer,” she said. “My boss would have me strung up and used like a piñata if she knew I botched the forms.”

All the other workers seemed to relax and joined in a mutual laugh.

The guard smirked as he gave her back the form. “Good luck with all that,” he said. “Sorry to bother you, but we’re being extra cautious. The National Convention is going on in Canterlot right now. In fact, the morning’s keynote speech and Sunrise Breakfast Banquet is starting soon.”

Red Dahlia’s eyes widened. “Oh?” she asked. “I had no idea!”

“It’s fine,” he said, saluting her. “Just be more careful next time. Carry on!”

With that, he and Sky Warden flew off.

A worker came up alongside Red Dahlia. “Think their inquiry to Cloudsdale will be a problem?” he whispered.

“Not a bit,” she whispered through her grin as she continued to watch the guards’ retreat. “It’ll take hours before they get word back. By that time, it won’t even matter. We’ll have done our duty in about twenty minutes.” She placed her hoof on her heart. “For TechQuestria.”

The gathered ponies formed a circle and mirrored the gesture. “For TechQuestria,” they said in unison.

***

Turing Test helped Twilight down the stairs of the arena rather than let her strain herself by flying. Once they arrived in the center, the others quickly spotted them.

“There they are!” Rainbow Dash exclaimed, taking to the air and swooping over to them. The others made their way over as well, though they had to take care to avoid the fragments of metal and machinery that littered the arena floor.

“Hello my friends,” Turing Test said as she lowered Twilight into the center ring with her magic and then hopped down after.

Rainbow embraced her robotic friend tightly. “Ah, jeez, Tee… it’s great to see you,” she whispered.

Turing Test patted her on the back. “Likewise, Rainbow Dash,” she said. “Tell me, are you once again getting ‘mushy’ on me?”

“N-no!” Rainbow Dash snapped, letting her go instantly. Then she turned her attention to Twilight. “Oh my gosh, Twilight, what happened?!”

The others arrived and likewise gasped when they saw the various cuts and scratches all over Twilight’s body, as well as the visible bruise on one of her wings.

“I’m okay, everypony,” she said, giving them a reassuring smile. “Just a little banged up. Turing and I walked into an ambush, but everything’s okay now.” Then she smiled. “I’m just glad you’re all okay.”

The others went to her, sweeping her up in a group hug. Twilight held Spike particularly close.

They then turned their attention to Turing Test, though they hesitated a moment before going to her.

Turing tilted her head. “Is something the matter?” she asked.

“W-well, darling,” Rarity began as she rubbed her chin, eyeing Turing worriedly, “it’s just that, well… are you really, um, you?”

Turing tapped her chin as she considered the question. Then she lay down in the ‘Draw Me Like One of Your Prench Girls’ pose she remembered from Rarity’s book. “Oh darling,” she intoned, “I am as me as I have ever been.”

This got a big laugh from Rarity and the others, but as Turing got back to her hooves, she suddenly found herself held tightly by Pinkie Pie.

“Rinny,” she whispered. “It… it really is you!”

“Pinkie Pie,” she murmured, surprised at how emotional her friend was. “Please do not be concerned. I am in perfect working order. There is no reason to be so distressed.”

She looked up and saw the the others were now smiling at her. Some of them had tears in their eyes. A moment later, she found herself on the receiving end of a group hug.

“Ah,” she said. “I have missed you as well, my friends.”

For a moment, they only held each other, glad to be reunited at last.

Immediately afterward, however, the group erupted into excited chatter as they began to share their experiences getting to the amphitheater.

“Spike, I’m so glad you’re safe!” Twilight cried.

“Yeah, I’m fine!” he said, puffing out his chest. “Gadget and I fought off some guards, but then we both got caught, and later I helped Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy escape! What about you, Twilight?”

Twilight began to tell about her escape with Turing Test. Nearby, Rainbow Dash was talking to Rarity and Pinkie Pie.

“Hey, that music gun you and Pinkie found was awesome, Rarity!” Rainbow Dash exclaimed. “Please tell me there are more of them!”

“Sad to say,” Rarity said, rolling her eyes, “there are not, as far as I know.”

“Yeah, it’s a shame we had to use it to blow up that big metal door,” Pinkie sighed. “That AKG-9000 would have made one heck of a party cannon.”

She pulled a piece of the now-destroyed machine from her mane that she’d kept as a souvenir. She kissed it tenderly.

“Poor weaponized sound machine,” she whispered, “you were too good for this world.”

Meanwhile, Gadget, Umahara, and Fluttershy were talking to Turing Test.

“...and then I turned into a giant!” Gadget shouted, practically bouncing on her hooves. “At first it was really weird, but then I scared off all the guards and smashed up the entire refinery!”

“It was impressive,” Umahara said. Then, with a sly sideways glance at Gadget, he added, “And a little scary.”

“Darn right!” Gadget said, crossing her mechanical arms in front of her chest. Then, turning back to Turing Test, she said, “Anyway, Umahara was awesome too. He used a bunch of spell cards, and the guards didn’t know what hit them!”

“Not as awesome as you were, using your arms to take on all those guards!”

She punched him playfully in the foreleg. “Aw, come on! I mean, we never would have made it in there without that invisibility spell you gave me!”

Fluttershy and Turing both watched the two of them. Fluttershy giggled at the sight, covering her mouth with her hoof, though Turing wasn’t certain why.

“I see,” Turing replied, cutting in. “It seems that you two had a fascinating adventure.”

“It really does!” Fluttershy exclaimed. “Oh my… it is a little scary to think of you as a giant pony, Gadget, but I’m glad you’re both all right. Rainbow Dash, Spike, and I barely escaped at all from 004!”

Turing Test’s ears went ramrod straight.

“You encountered my brother?” she asked, drawing the attention of the others.

Rainbow Dash walked over. “Yeah,” she said, raising her wing and gingerly touching her side. “I’m pretty sure he broke a rib or two.”

“But how did you manage to escape?”

“It was awesome!” Rainbow Dash shouted. “I kept him busy, but then Fluttershy found Spike and a bunch of animals and set them free! Spike overheated him with his fire breath, and then they all ganged up and kicked 004’s sorry flank! They just about smashed him to pieces!”

Turing Test froze, her eyes constricting as she stared at Rainbow Dash. “To… pieces?”

“Rainbow Dash!” Fluttershy hissed. “That’s her brother, remember!”

Rainbow winced, realizing her error. She lowered her head, her ears going back. “Oh… oh, right, Tee. Sorry.”

Turing turned to Fluttershy. “Fluttershy… I am glad that you escaped 004,” she whispered, “but please tell me… were you forced to destroy him?”

Fluttershy shook her head. “No, Turing Test,” she said. “I stopped the animals once the fight was over. He wasn’t literally in pieces. He’s damaged, but I’m certain he can be fixed, so please don’t worry; he’s all right.”

Turing Test was still for a moment. Then she went to Fluttershy and embraced her.

“Thank you,” she whispered. “Thank you for sparing my baby brother.”

Fluttershy smiled as she returned the hug. “Oh Turing,” she said. “You really are a kind pony. And I think, in his own way, 004 cares about you too. He mentioned you. I think something you said to him got to him. I think maybe he feels guilty about hurting you… or maybe he’s just grateful that you said you didn’t hate him.”

Turing nodded silently as she let Fluttershy go. “I am so relieved,” she said. “I know my siblings have hurt you all, but I still hope that my family and I will one day be able to be together as one.”

“Speaking of which,” Umahara said looking around at the wreckage of the drones scattered all around them, “it looks like 002 really went after you and Twilight.”

“She did,” Twilight said, rubbing her bruised wing tenderly. “It’s hard to believe how much anger and bitterness she had inside her. She really seemed to enjoy terrorizing us and watching us run for our lives.”

“I can believe that,” Gadget said, shivering at the memory of her own encounter with 002.

“But Turing Test was amazing,” Twilight continued, smiling at her mechanical companion. “She kept me safe and even figured out that 002 was watching us from close by!”

“That is correct,” Turing said. “Once I determined her actions, I confronted her. She stated that she had no further interest in existing in servitude of TechQuestria, or in any existence at all. She… she instructed me to destroy her.”

They all stared at her.

“But I did not,” Turing continued. “I could not. I chose to spare my sister.”

“You did what?!” Umahara shouted, drawing stares from all of them.

Twilight frowned at him and went to Turing, putting her foreleg around Turing’s shoulders. “That’s right, she spared her,” Twilight said, raising her chin. “And I’m very proud of her for it.”

“I understand your misgivings, Mr. Umahara,” Turing said, “but due to the time I have spent with Twilight Sparkle and the rest of my friends, I have developed a respect and concern for life. The lives of others are precious. And if even my life as an artificial being has value, then I assert that 002’s life is important as well.”

Umahara made a face, looking away. “Maybe so,” he muttered, “but 002 is twisted and heartless. Gadget told me all about what she said, and we all have seen what she did to us… and it looks like she nearly killed Twilight! She obviously doesn’t hold life in the same regard as you. How in Equestria could you just let her go on her way?”

“This may sound illogical,” Turing said, meeting his gaze, “but I believe I ‘saw myself in her,’ as the expression goes.”

“But you’re nothing like her!” Spike cried.

“Yeah, Turing,” Gadget added, “you’re sweet and gentle and--”

“Forgive me, but what I mean is that I could have become a robot like her,” she said, holding up her hoof to silence them. “We both began our existences in the same way, with only the most basic mentality to start with. I was raised and educated by Twilight Sparkle and encouraged by my friends. I was accepted by others and given the right to make choices in my own existence. 002, however, was not. The ponies of TechQuestria did not regard her as a sentient being and used her only for labor. She was shown no care or affection. Our upbringings were what shaped us… which means that if I had been the one to stay in TechQuestria rather than her, then it is likely that I would have acted as she did.

“I could not punish her for her actions because, quite simply, I believe that I would have done the same.”

They all looked to each other, considering what she’d said.

Before anypony could comment further, however, they heard the galloping of hooves as somepony approached. They all turned and looked at the giant hole that the AKG had blasted in the arena. A moment later, Applejack emerged.

“I’m here, I’m here!” she shouted, skidding to a halt as she looked around. Her face lit up when she saw her friends standing there. “Aha! I knew I’d find y’all if I kept lookin’!”

“Applejack!” they all shouted, running to her.

“Whoa there, I--oof!” she grunted as Pinkie latched onto her, followed by the others. “I sure am glad to see ya, everypony. I--” She paused, noticing Umahara. “Uh, what’s he doin’ here?”

“I’m on your side now,” Umahara said, keeping his distance as he waved to her. “Please don’t hit me,” he quickly added.

Applejack shrugged, deciding not to question it. “Now hang on, everypony!” she said as she pried Pinkie Pie off of her. “It ain’t just me that’s here. I brought a friend!”

Turing’s ears twitched as she heard the whirr of mechanical legs. She was the first to notice, but the others followed her gaze as Applejack walked over to the entrance.

“Come on now,” Applejack said softly, beckoning for the pony in the shadows to come out. “Don’t be scared. Nopony here’s gonna do ya any harm.”

001 emerged from the tunnel, her camera eyes refocusing in the more brightly lit arena. The others all stood and stared at the new robot in their midst, but it was then that 001’s gaze fell on Turing Test.

Turing’s eyes shrank to pinpricks. “Applejack?” she asked. “You found another of my siblings?”

“This here is Unit 001, Turing,” Applejack said, giving her a warm smile as she went over to 001, placing her hoof on the robot’s shoulder. “001, that’s Turing Test. You two are sisters.”

001 cocked her head at Turing Test. Then she began to approach her. Turing Test did the same.

When they met 001 raised a hoof and Turing Test mirrored the gesture. Each one watched the other in silence as they took in the sight of one another. Turing touched her hoof to 001’s, and at first 001 flinched away, but then she seemed to relax and press her hoof to Turing’s.

001’s jaw moved as she spoke: “You sissa?” she asked.

Turing nodded. “Yes,” she replied quietly. “I am your younger sister, Turing Test.”

001 put a hoof over her own eye, mimicking 002. “Nice sissa? Mean sissa?”

Turing wasn’t certain how to respond at first, so she tapped her chin. “If you are inquiring as to whether I am amicable or not,” she said, “then I would say that I am, at least in my own estimation.”

001 tilted her head from side to side. “You talk lots. Talky talk talk.”

“Ah,” Turing Test said. “Then I will speak plainly.”

She stepped closer and put her hoof on 001’s shoulder, meeting her pale green eyes. “I am very happy to meet you, Big Sister.”

001 raised her head. “Me big sissa,” she said slowly. “You lil sissa. Sissa. Happy sissa.”

She came closer and rested her head on Turing Test’s shoulder.

“Nice sissa,” she murmured. “Nice sissa Turry Tess.”

Turing gently embraced her. “Yes,” she said quietly. “I will be a good sister to you, 001.”

She turned and saw the others were all watching her. Fluttershy, Rarity, and Twilight had tears in their eyes.

“Oh, this is just wonderful, Turing!” Rarity said, dabbing at her eyes with her hoof. “I wish I had a camera to capture the moment!”

“Me too, Rarity,” Twilight said, approaching the pair of siblings. “But no matter what, I’m sure I won’t forget this.” She smiled at Turing. “I’m so glad you found another member of your family, Turing.”

“And that she’s nice instead of a killer robot!” Pinkie added.

Twilight’s smile became strained. “Yes, Pinkie, thank you,” she said.

“Me not killa rowboat!” 001 shouted, suddenly throwing her forelegs in the air. “Nice rowboat! Nice nice!”

The others watched as she began to jump and galavant around excitedly.

“Uh, why’s she… um... like that?” Rainbow Dash asked, whispering to Umahara.

Umahara frowned. “She was a prototype for the neural net that makes Turing and the others work,” he whispered back. “But it’s not as complex or as developed. I thought she was in storage.” He turned to Applejack. “How on earth did you find her?”

“It’s kind of a long story,” Applejack said, rubbing the back of her neck. “I’ll save it fer later, but right now I’m just glad I found 001 at all. Lan’ sakes, she coulda been stuck in that box for who knows how long if I hadn’t come across ‘er!”

Turing Test turned to her. “My sister was in a box?” she demanded.

“It you sis in a box!” 001 sang.

“Yeah,” Applejack sighed. “They just turned her off an’ left ‘er there.”

Gadget glanced over at Umahara, wrinkling her nose.

“Whoa, hey, she was put into storage when I was just a colt!” Umahara protested, holding up his hooves. “Don’t blame me!”

“Perhaps the important thing is simply that she is here now,” Turing said as she turned to 001. “Eldest Sister, these are my friends,” she said, sweeping a foreleg at them.

001 stopped dancing around and pointed at the others. “You friends?”

“Correct,” Turing replied. She began to point to each of them, introducing them to her. “They are Fluttershy--”

“Futtachai!” 001 said, echoing her.

“--Rarity--”

“Raradee!”

“--Gadget--”

“Gazzet!”

“--Pinkie Pie--”

“Ponka Pa!”

“--Spike--”

“Spork!”

“--Rainbow Dash--”

“Fus Ro Dah!”

“Oh come on, that wasn’t even close!” Rainbow snapped.

Umahara snickered.

“--my mentor, Twilight Sparkle--”

“Toilet Spackle!”

“Hey!” Twilight shouted, even as Rainbow Dash and Pinkie erupted into loud laughter.

“--and last of all,” Turing said, coming to Umahara at last.

Umahara stiffened up. Oh boy, here it comes, he said to himself.

“--is Umahara.”

“Umahara!”

“That’s--!” Umahara froze, blinking a few times. “Oh. Yeah.”

Applejack patted 001 on the back. “Glad ya met everypony, 001” she said. “But enough o’ this standin’ around. Now that we’re all here, let’s skedaddle!”

They all voiced their agreement and made for the stairs that would lead them up and out of the amphitheater.

“Wait!” a voice cried from behind them.

They turned and saw a white unicorn stallion with a graying mane and mustache running after them.

“Looks like we’ve got more trouble!” Rainbow Dash growled, taking to the air as she and the others assumed a defensive position.

However, Umahara’s eyes lit up. “Mr. Alfalfa Sprouts!” he exclaimed. “Everypony, relax!” he shouted, going to meet him.

“Alfalfa Sprouts?” Twilight asked.

“Scanning data regarding TechQuestrian personnel,” Turing Test intoned. “Subject identified. Though I have not met him, he is listed as one of the members of the TechQuestrian Council, the governing body of TechQuestria.”

Alfalfa Sprouts nodded, panting as he slowed to a halt. “That’s… that’s right!” he gasped, wiping the sweat from his forehead. “I’m glad I caught up to you! It looks like you gave the guards the slip!”

“More like used a giant sound wave to blast them,” Pinkie said, giving a shrug of her shoulders, “but po-tay-to, po-tah-to.”

“Tornado, torpedo!” 001 agreed, nodding emphatically.

“Mr. Alfalfa Sprouts is one of the elected Civilian Representatives,” Umahara explained. “He actually proposed cancelling New Dawn.”

“Yes, but the proposal failed,” Alfalfa Sprouts sighed. “Listen, we don’t have much time. I came here to give you something…”

They noticed he was carrying a pouch around his neck. He undid the drawstrings and removed a small, L-shaped piece of metal.

Umahara and Turing Test both jerked their heads back in surprise.

“That’s a security hex key!” Umahara exclaimed.

“Twilight Sparkle, you and Rarity may use it to remove the magic suppression rings on your horns,” Turing explained.

“Oh, thank heavens!” Rarity cried. “I can’t wait to get this horrid thing off me!” She reached for it, but then paused, blushing as she looked to Twilight. “Ah, but perhaps you should go first, Twilight?”

“Hey, you said you couldn’t wait,” Twilight said, smirking at her. “Go ahead.”

Rarity grinned as she took the key. The others helped her use it to deactivate the ring around her horn. As they did so, Twilight bowed to Alfalfa Sprouts.

“We’re very grateful for your help, sir,” she said.

Alfalfa Sprouts smiled. “It’s the least I could do,” he said.

Gadget approached him as well, adjusting her glasses as she looked up at him. “Sir, if you don’t mind my asking,” she began, “it’s great that you’re helping us… but why are you doing it?”

He looked down at her, momentarily taken aback at the question. Then he smiled. “You’re Gadget, aren’t you?”

She blinked, surprised by the question, but nodded.

“Ah,” he said, giving a sideways glance at Umahara. “So, this is the young lady you were so taken with, Umahara?”

Both Umahara and Gadget blushed deeply.

“Jeez, did everypony in TechQuestria think we were dating?” Gadget grumbled.

“I apologize,” Alfalfa said, chuckling, “but after the Council meeting, I started having second thoughts about what we were doing. Or, at least, what I was doing. I felt like I had to abide by the Council’s decision, and that respecting our democracy was more important than how I felt about it. But then I realized that I had a duty to try to do what I felt was right, not what the majority said was right. When I heard about the escape, I had a feeling that Mr. Umahara had a hoof in it. I figured if that young pony could do it, then I should do something too.

“Listen, Princess Twilight,” he said, taking Twilight’s hoof, “I’m so sorry for all of this. I and most of the rest of TechQuestria came here because we wanted our own nation. We wanted to do things our own way without Celestia holding us back. I still believe in that, and so do a lot of us. But Cobbler convinced too many of us to abandon that goal, and now we’re forcing our way of life onto the rest of Equestria.

“Cobbler says that TechQuestria has to do this or else it won’t survive. But now I’m worried that this will start a war that will destroy both nations. If TechQuestria’s doomed, then it’s our fault for betraying our ideals. I’d rather face that than drag others down with us.”

Twilight undid the magic suppressor on her horn, letting it fall to the ground and roll away in the dust. She smiled at Alfalfa Sprouts. “Sir, I think what you’re doing is very brave,” she said. “Thank you for this. And, for what it’s worth, I’ll vouch for you and try to preserve the best of what TechQuestria has to offer.”

He nodded. “I appreciate that. Still, I’m sure there will be consequences later, and I’ll gladly face them. For now, I’m going back to the Residential District to be with my family. As for you lot, you’d better get going.”

Umahara’s eyes widened. “Wait… does anypony know what time it is?”

Turing Test nodded. “At the tone, it will be 5:46 AM,” she replied. “Beep.”

Now Alfalfa Sprouts wore the same look of shock as Umahara.

“This is no time for jokes! You need to go now!” he shouted. “New Dawn launches at six o’clock when the sun rises!”

“He’s right!” Umahara exclaimed, turning and leading them up the stairs. “This way! We’ll take the main elevator back to the surface! The launch site is a few kilometers away! We can make it if we hurry!”

They all ran up the stairs toward the Great Hall. As they went, Alfalfa Sprouts watched them go. He took a deep breath, letting it out slowly.

“Good luck,” he whispered. “For all our sakes.”

***

Celestia walked through the banquet hall, her hooves clicking lightly on the smooth marble floor. The room was filled with tables for all the delegates. Many were already there and taking their seats, and more were filing in. In her experience hosting the National Conference each year, there were always a few stragglers, but it was much more common for everypony to arrive to the Sunrise Banquet on the last day of the conference. They all wanted to watch their princess as she raised the sun.

She smiled at the gathering ponies, each one the leader of their town, village, city, or otherwise. The mayor of Ponyville was there, as well as the mayor of Manehatten, the Sheriff of Appleoosa, and Fancy Pants, who wasn’t a political leader, but had been chosen by the citizens of Canterlot to represent them. All told, just over a hundred delegates would be there.

Celestia went to the balcony and looked out at the castle gardens below. In a tower across the way, she spotted Luna walking out onto her own balcony as she prepared to lower the moon.

She smiled at the sight of her sister, but couldn’t help the nagging feeling at the back of her mind. There hadn’t been any word from Mustangia yet. She told herself that perhaps Twilight and her friends simply hadn’t found anything. It had only been a day, after all.

But something just felt wrong. Her instincts were telling her that something was about to happen. Her instincts weren’t always right, of course, but they’d served her well enough for the last thousand years.

And yet there was nothing she could do. She couldn’t send more guards to Mustangia without just cause, and even if she did, it would take time to get there. Not only that, there was the conference to think about.

Just put it out of mind, Celestia, she told herself. After the conference is over, I’ll see to Twilight and the others. For now, the ponies of Equestria need me.

She glanced a nearby clock, though she hardly even needed to, her schedule was so internalized.

Five minutes until six. Until dawn. A new day for Equestria was about to begin.

***

Cobbler Mustang stood at the door as it was opened for him. He stepped inside.

“The President is on the bridge!” shouted the First Officer. “Attention!”

All the ponies stood up from their stations and saluted him.

Cobbler smiled and saluted them back, removing his hat. “As you were, my friends,” he said. “Commander, is everything in order?”

“Yes, Mr. President!” the first officer said. He was an earth pony stallion with a black mane and beard and a burgundy coat. “The captain’s chair is all yours, sir.”

Cobbler stepped in. The bridge was U-shaped, with various stations and consoles all around him. A dozen ponies sat, eagerly checking their instruments, reading dials, and using their headsets to communicate with the various decks of New Dawn. At the center of the bridge was a raised platform with a large, cushioned chair.

Before taking his seat, however, he walked to the thing that was placed just in front of his chair.

Atop a cylindrical metallic pedestal was a circular disk. Sticking out of like the spokes of a ship’s steering wheel were six vials. Inside each, dimly glowing, was pure thaumatrium. It had been refined to be almost solid, much like the thaumatrium used inside the magic mechanisms of 003 and 004. He ran his hoof in a circle around the device, noting the colors: white, blue, pink, yellow, orange, and, last of all, lavender.

The Elements. The data gathered by 004 had helped them calibrate the thaumatrium to match the signature of Twilight Sparkle and each of her friends to a virtually perfect match. It should perfectly emulate the power of the Elements of Harmony.

Such an awesome power that they wield. And now, thanks to our efforts constructing this device, the Harmonic Drive, so do we.

“Commander, please prime the Harmonic Drive,” he said.

The commander raised an eyebrow. A few of the gathered officers paused what they were doing and looked over at him.

“Sir, we’ve been told that we shouldn’t utilize the Harmonic Drive unless it was necessary,” the commander said. “It hasn’t gone through very much testing.”

“I’m aware of that,” Cobbler said. “But we’ve yet to hear word from Commander Lugnut. I have to assume, therefore, that Twilight Sparkle and her friends are on their way here. If so, then this device will soon prove very necessary. Wouldn’t you agree?”

The room got very quiet.

“Prime the Harmonic Drive!” barked the commander.

Cobbler took his seat. The Harmonic Drive began to hum as it powered on. The thaumatrium in the vials started to glow more intensely.

“Very good,” Cobbler said. “Commander, will you please activate the PA system and pass me the microphone?”

“Yes, sir!” he said, taking the microphone in his hoof. He cleared his throat and turned it on. “Attention citizens of TechQuestria! This is Commander Hill Hiker of the New Dawn! Please stand by for a message from President Cobbler Mustang!”

Cobbler took the microphone. “My fellow citizens,” he began, “today is a glorious day…”

***

Across TechQuestria, ponies in their homes or at their stations throughout the extensive network of caverns raised their heads as Cobbler’s voice echoed out to them.

Weissenhoof Seedling listened in the Biological Research Department.

“Yes, a glorious day indeed,” Cobbler continued. “Today the ponies of TechQuestria will reveal themselves to the world.”

Bell Breaky and Airy Siren paused in the hallway on the way to the Magitech Department.

“I realize today has not gone perfectly according to plan. Betrayal and sabotage have threatened all that we’ve worked on. But none of that matters now.”

Dr. Hawk Eye glanced up from the patient he was treating in the Medical Ward.

“In the end, not even these setbacks could stop us. Today, the tyranny of the old regime will fall, and a great age of knowledge and scientific advancement unseen by ponykind in all of history will dawn.”

And even Blue Blazer, who’d finally escaped and gone to her post in the Communications Department, stood by and listened to Cobbler’s voice.

“Today we will rise up and use our combined might to end the reign of shortsighted royals and petty nobles once and for all! The sacrifices of those who came before us will not be in vain! Rejoice for freedom! For innovation! For progress! For TechQuestria!

“Today, Canterlot will see the light of dawn: the New Dawn has arrived!!”

***

In her charging station, 002 reclined against the wall, rolling her eye as Cobbler finished his speech.

“Blah blah blah,” she intoned. “The old windbag sure likes to hear himself talk.”

***

Cobbler passed the microphone back to the commander.

“Excellent speech, Mr. President!” Commander Hiker said.

“Yes, but the time for speeches is over now,” Cobbler said, getting to his hooves. “Now is the time for action! Initiate the launch sequence!”

“You heard him, everypony!” the commander bellowed. “Prepare for launch!”

The communications officer switched on her system, broadcasting to the whole of New Dawn. “All crew members, prepare for launch! I repeat, all crew members prepare for launch!”

“Engines have been engaged,” the helmsmare said, “levitation panels energized.”

A dull rumble grew louder as the great machine they piloted came to life.

“Deployment reports that officers are at the ready, sir!”

“Weapons are charging!”

“Engineering reports that thaumatrium is flowing at 100% efficiency!”

“Docking clamps are releasing in three… two… one…”

The sound of the massive metal clamps disengaging was heard throughout the massive chamber. The vessel began to rise.

“Launch area is clear. Airspace is clear. Transmission towers are in place!”

Cobbler couldn’t keep the grin from his face. “Excellent work, everypony!” he laughed. “Open the launch bay doors!”

***

On the surface, Twilight and her friends ran across an open field. Along the way, Umahara had explained what New Dawn was. The thought of such a machine reaching Canterlot was unthinkable, but she’d already seen what TechQuestria was capable of and how far Cobbler would go to achieve his goals.

It’s almost dawn! she realized. If only we’d managed to escape faster… no, there’s no time to dwell on that. Right now we just have to focus on stopping it before it gets to Canterlot!

“We might not make it at this rate!” Rainbow Dash shouted, flying in front of them. “Let’s just use our Rainbow Power and we can zoom over there in less than a second!”

“No!” Umahara shouted. “Look, it’s like I said: they have devices that would detect it from over twenty kilometers away! If they know you’re coming, they’ll activate the Harmonic Drive for sure! You need to wait until we get there to try and catch them off guard!”

“But if we wait too long,” Fluttershy said, “then we might be too late to stop them!”

“They’ve both got a point, Twilight,” Applejack said. “What should we do?”

Twilight didn’t respond immediately, thinking even as she ran. “We… we should do what Umahara says,” she replied. “After all, his plan got us out of TechQuestria, didn’t it?”

“That’s true!” Pinkie exclaimed, looking up at the sky, which was still dark. “I was starting to wonder if I’d ever see the sky again! I mean, I grew up getting rocks out of caves, but I think I’d go cuh-razy if I had to live in one!”

“Okay okay!” Rainbow Dash snapped. “Look, just get the lead out, everypony!”

“I am not made of lead, Rainbow Dash,” Turing Test remarked.

“That’s not what I--”

“That was a joke,” she added. “Ha ha.”

“Ha ha! Ha ha!” 001 shouted, repeating after her.

“Turing, I get that you’re trying to give a little levity here,” Twilight said, “but this isn’t the time!”

They thundered like a herd of wild horses across the open, grassy plain in silence, but Twilight’s mind was filled with doubts and fears that seemed almost deafening.

The Harmonic Drive. A machine that can emulate the powers of the Elements of Harmony, according to what Umahara told us on the way here. I can’t believe they built something like that… but if it’s true, then almost nothing could stop them! And to think, trying to steal our power was the entire reason for sending Turing Test in the first place…

She glanced over at Turing, who noticed and turned to face her as well.

“Is something wrong, Twilight Sparkle?” she asked.

Twilight managed a smile. “A lot,” she replied. “But nothing with you, Turing Test.”

“I see. That is good to know, at least.”

Twilight was about to say more when they heard Gadget gasp.

“Look!” she exclaimed, pointing with one of her mechanical hands. “The moon is setting!”

Twilight’s heart skipped a beat. If Luna was lowering the moon, then that meant…!

***

Celestia stood on the balcony, her horn glowing with its telltale golden aura. The delegates all stood at their places, looking out through the tall windows as the glow of the rising sun peeked over the horizon, bathing the land in golden light.

Celestia turned and spread her wings majestically. “Ponies of Equestria!” she said, addressing the crowd of delegates. “Good morning, and welcome to the final day of the Equestrian National Conference! As dawn comes to Equestria today, let us work towards a brighter future for us all!”

The hall erupted with applause.

***

The ground began to shake, causing them all to stumble.

“An earthquake?!” Rarity cried.

“No!” Umahara yelled. “They’re launching! Look!”

Twilight looked across the plain. In the light of the rising sun, she saw the grassy field begin to tremble and ripple as if it were turning to liquid. Then, impossibly, she saw the field begin to rise up. It was then that she realized that the earth itself was opening up: something was hidden beneath the ground and was pushing the top layer of soil out of the way.

The dirt began to slide off of the massive, flat object as it rose. Twilight saw that it was a metal door that seemed to take up the whole horizon. It swung completely open, dumping what remained of the layer of dirt as it came down with a thunderous sound. Something inside the newly-opened chamber produced a roar as it ascended into the air above.

They all stared up at the gargantuan machine with a mixture of awe and horror, but only Gadget managed to articulate what they were all thinking:

“Incredible,” she breathed.

The New Dawn was an airship, but not like any they’d ever seen. It was covered with armored metal plating. It had to be nearly 300 meters long and a hundred meters wide at the beam. The upper deck was flat, but the observation deck and the bridge near the ship’s stern rose up like the tower of a castle. Impossibly, the monolithic machine, which was large enough to completely block out the view of the rising sun, had no balloons or even propellers to keep it aloft. Instead, glowing blue panels along the ship’s hull produced a deep, resonant sound as they lifted the ship.

“They’ve launched New Dawn,” Umahara breathed.

Twilight shook her head, putting her fear aside. “Then it’s now or never, everypony!” she shouted. “Spike, Gadget, Turing, Umahara, 001, stand back! Everypony else, let’s stop them right here!”

The six of them gathered around Twilight. There was a strange sound, and they all began to glow. Columns of light shot into the sky. There was a bright flash, and the six bearers of the Elements of Harmony rose into the sky, now transformed by the Elements’ power.

“Amazing,” Umahara breathed.

“It is,” Gadget agreed. “But… um…”

“Big goofy hair!” 001 yelped, pointing up at them.

“Well, somepony had to say it,” Gadget said, grinning at 001. “Still, it looks like we’re just in time, right Turing?”

There was no response, so Gadget turned and saw that Turing’s eyes had constricted. Her ears began to twitch.

“Turing?” she asked.

“I… I hear something…”

Gadget raised an eyebrow. “You hear something?” she repeated. “What do you mean?”

“I am not certain,” Turing whispered.

They all looked as Twilight and the others rose up in a brilliant orb of light, the colors of the rainbow swirling around them.

***

“We’ve achieved liftoff!” the helmsmare declared.

The bridge erupted in cheers, but she suddenly cried out again.

“Sir, we’re getting a massive energy reading! The Elements are here!”

Cobbler leaped out of his seat and went to the console of the Harmonic Drive. “Engage the counter-wave function immediately!” he bellowed.

The ponies around him did as he ordered, and the large button on the console began to glow.

“Ready to fire, sir!”

Cobbler brought his hoof down on the button.

***

Twilight glared down at the colossal ship. “All right, everypony!” she hollered. “We’ll use our power to take out some of those levitation panels on the side to force them to land. We don’t want to hurt--”

Suddenly there was a massive burst of multihued energy from the bridge of the ship. It blasted forth, and they all screamed as it slammed into them. Twilight felt the energy tear through her body and found herself struggling to breathe. It lasted only a moment, but her head was swimming and she felt her limbs go numb.

Wind whistled in her ears. She tried to focus her vision. Then she realized that they were falling.

The power that they’d wielded had been stripped away.

“Everypony, wake up!” she shouted, spreading her wings.

Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy came to and did the same. They quickly swooped down, catching their remaining companions and carrying them safely to the ground below.

“Twilight!” Spike shouted, running over to them. “What happened?!”

Twilight was still gasping for air. Her body was coated with a cold sweat.

“That device,” Twilight whispered. “The Harmonic Drive… Umahara was right: it works. It can counter the Elements!”

“But… I mean…” he stammered. “Then how do we stop them?”

Twilight looked up at the airship as it hung in the air.

“I don’t know, Spike,” she whispered, hugging herself.

***

The bridge crew all groaned. The wave of energy had actually been produced from the top of the control tower, but it seemed to create some kind of recoil effect. The machinery in the bridge momentarily went haywire as well, but to their relief it all seemed to be working normally again.

“Observation reports that the Elements are down!” the communications officer shouted. “It worked!”

Another cheer went up from the crew, but then the commander looked to Cobbler and saw that he was hunched over the Harmonic Drive. He was staring into space and breathing shallowly.

“Sir!” the commander cried, going to his side and shaking him. “Are you all right?”

Cobbler swallowed and gradually turned to face the commander. Then his gaze seem to refocus, and he grinned.

“Yes,” he said slowly. “I do apologize if I gave you a fright, but I just…”

He took a deep breath and stumbled back, taking his seat in the captain’s chair again.

“It was quite overwhelming,” he said. “The power… For a moment I--” He paused, his ears twitching. “Commander? Did you say something?”

The commander narrowed his eyes. “No, sir,” he replied. “Mr. President, are you certain you’re all right?”

Cobbler waved him off. “I’m fine, I’m fine. Prepare for teleportation jump!”

“Aye, sir!” the commander said. “Prepare for teleportation jump!”

The communications officer relayed the order to the rest of the ship.

“Sir!” she said. “Observation deck has spotted some other ponies with the Elements! It appears to be the other fugitives, 003… and 001, sir!”

Cobbler frowned, but got up and went to the window. He took out a telescope and peered through it. His frown deepened at what he saw. “Engage the speakers,” he said. “I would like to say farewell before we depart. Oh, and send a small group to contain them while they’re weakened. Even if we can counter them, they could still be trouble if they recover. We mustn’t let them escape.”

***

Turing Test went to Twilight’s side as well. “Twilight Sparkle, your injuries have vanished,” she observed, noting that the scratches and injuries she’d received from 002’s drones were now gone. “How is that possible?”

Twilight struggled to get up, but Spike and Turing assisted her. “The Elements rejuvenate us,” she said. “The first time we ever used them, they regrew Rarity’s tail!”

“Yeah, and it looks like my ribs are better now too!” Rainbow Dash exclaimed. Then she winced, clutching her head. “But that thing they hit us with gave me a splitting headache. I feel like I got run over by a stampede of buffalo.”

There was the crackle of static above them. Somehow above the din of the gigantic ship, Cobbler’s voice carried.

“Well, Princess Twilight,” he said. “It seems you were able to join us for this special day after all. I regret that we couldn’t come to an understanding, but I believe you can now see why resisting us was pointless.”

“I’ll show you pointless!” Rainbow Dash shouted up to him.

“I don’t think he can hear you, Rainbow Dash,” Fluttershy murmured.

“Umahara, my dear boy,” Cobbler continued, “I don’t know how you and that girl got away from those guards, but I promise you that you will pay for your treason. For all the kindness I showed you, you can expect an equal amount of ire. Bear that in mind.”

Umahara heaved a sigh, looking down. Gadget placed her hoof on his shoulder.

“Well, it seems you’ve regained control of Unit 003 and even stolen Unit 001 from us, Twilight. However, even if they are both more trouble than they’re worth, they still belong to us. I’m afraid we’ll have to take them from you; they are TechQuestrian property, after all.”

Turing’s ears slowly drooped. “Father,” she whispered. Is that truly how you see us?

001 cowered on the ground, covering her head with her forelegs. “No go back… Not Da, no put back…”

Turing Test stood before her, offering her a hoof. “Do not worry, sister,” she said. “No matter what our father says, I will not let him deprive us of our freedom again.”

001 looked at her hoof blankly for a moment, but then took it and stood at her side.

“Well, I do believe our time is up, my friends,” Cobbler chuckled. “We’re off to Canterlot. I’ll give Celestia your best regards, Princess Twilight. In the meantime, I’m providing you with an escort back to TechQuestria.”

There was a series of four flashes, and suddenly somepony had seized Twilight and was pointing a spear at her neck. Three other ponies seized Spike, Rarity, and Fluttershy.

“Halt!” barked a strangely familiar voice.

They all looked and saw that it was Sea Hawk who’d seized Twilight, and the other brainwashed Royal Guards of Mustangia - Buttercup, Orange Slice, and Violet Wisp - who’d seized the others.

“Sergeant Sea Hawk!” Twilight shouted. “Let me go!”

“You are charged with crimes against the crown,” he intoned.

Turing Test took a step forward, but froze with a glare from Sea Hawk.

“Stay where you are!” he bellowed to Turing Test. To Twilight, he said, “I will escort you to a prison cell. If any of you make a move against us, I will be forced to take drastic measures. It is as Celestia wills it.”

To show he meant business, he held the tip of his spear almost against Twilight’s neck.

Above them, the great ship began to move toward the hills. A giant metal tower, the first of the line toward Canterlot, was just in front of them.

The ship began to glow. Electricity crackled around it. A high-pitched hum built and grew louder and louder.

“What are they doing?!” Gadget cried.

“They’re teleporting directly to Canterlot,” Umahara breathed. “They set up dozens of transmission towers across Equestria to boost the signal to get them there!”

“There’s gotta be something we can do!” Rainbow Dash shouted, taking to the air.

“You stay put if you know what’s good for you!” Orange Slice snarled, holding a short sword to Fluttershy’s throat.

Rainbow Dash grit her teeth and landed.

The New Dawn glowed brighter and brighter until it was almost blinding. Then, with a great sound, the massive ship suddenly vanished in a bright flash, leaving only the shockwave of air imploding and rebounding in the sudden vacuum echoing out over the Mustangian countryside.

“We’re too late,” Umahara groaned, placing his head in his hooves as he sank to the ground. “They’re on their way to Canterlot.”

***

Celestia gave her most regal, benevolent smile as she walked back into the banquet hall, turning her back from the balcony. She’d begun to move toward her seat at the head of the room when she heard a sound like thunder behind her, and then all the delegates screamed as a shockwave shattered the windows and knocked her to the floor.

She got up, whirled around, and ran to the balcony, unable to believe her eyes.

A gigantic metal airship was floating over the Canterlot Royal Gardens. The monolithic ship blocked out the sun and cast a long shadow over the palace, looming like a thundercloud over the castle grounds.

Along the side of the ship, she saw movement. On each side of the ship, a huge white screen unfurled, and unseen rear projectors began to display a gigantic image of a gear held up by a unicorn, an earth pony, and a pegasus upon them. In between the spokes of the gear were the letters “P,” “I,” and “F.”

Celestia’s jaw dropped open, her words catching in her throat.

It’s an invasion, she realized. Canterlot is under attack!

“Your Majesty!” shouted one of the Royal Guards as he ran to her side. “Please, you must get inside! We must get you to safety!”

Celestia remembered herself and nodded to him, her expression grave. “We must get the delegates to safety at once! Sound the alarm and rally all troops to defend Canterlot!”

She went with him as the other guards began to gather the panicked delegates to begin evacuating the room.

***

“Teleport jump complete!” the helmsmare shouted.

“Projector has been activated!” the communications officer reported.

“Excellent!” Cobbler said. “Now, while we still have the element of surprise, commence phase one! Deploy strike teams immediately!”

“Understood!” the tactical officer said. He pressed the comm button to broadcast belowdecks. “All strike teams deploy! I repeat, all strike teams deploy!”

***

In the bowels of the ship was a cavernous room lined on either side with four tiers of metallic alcoves, each one large enough to accommodate one pony. An armed soldier stood before each one. Many had masks and gas grenades, and most others had shock batons or pellet guns. A few even carried bladed weapons like spears or swords. A small number carried other specialized weapons. All told, eighty soldiers stood at the ready, their faces stern and tense, knowing their training was about to be put to the test.

The overhead intercom blared to life, and they heard the tactical officer give the order they’d been waiting for: “All strike teams deploy! I repeat, all strike teams deploy!”

They turned and entered the alcoves. There was a high-pitched whine, and they all simultaneously vanished in flashes of light, teleporting away to various places around Canterlot.

“First wave is away!” shouted the officer in charge. “Second wave, get into position!”

The next group began to scale the stairs and walkways, lining up in front of the teleportation alcoves.

***

All across Canterlot, before the general alarm could even be sounded, the forces of the Royal Guard suddenly found themselves under attack from soldiers teleporting in seemingly out of nowhere.

The guard tower at the outer wall barely had time to react as soldiers in gray uniforms fell on them, electrocuting them with shock batons as they stormed the parapets.

At outposts and barracks in three different locations, guards were bombarded with gas grenades and pelted with pellet guns as the TechQuestrian strike teams swiftly engaged, rounding them up.

Guards sleeping in their beds barely had time to get to their hooves before soldiers with strange devices suddenly encased their quarters in ice, or surrounded them with drones that utilized spinning blades. Others found themselves unable to escape as drones armed with explosives were placed at every entrance and exit.

Even newly-recruited cadets who’d awakened at first light were suddenly greeted by soldiers who overwhelmed them. The less-experienced cadets, too green to know what to do, mostly surrendered and were rounded up before being taken to the mess hall to be locked in. The few brave cadets who tried to resist were answered with a shock baton before being tossed in with the others.

Even the Night Guard found itself under attack. Bombs detonated at the entrances and exits of supposedly secret underground bunkers, sealing many inside. A barracks that was home to thestral pegasi, many just then bedding down for the night, was suddenly greeted with blinding sun lamps that left them stumbling before devices that produced piercing sonic waves simply incapacitated them.

***

“Reports are coming in, Mr. President,” the tactical officer said, holding his hoof to his earpiece. He grinned. “We’re getting only minimal resistance. Seventy-five percent of all targets of tactical importance have been secured.”

Cobbler nodded. “Activate shield generators,” he ordered.

“Aye, sir!”

***

A machine with a large tank of thaumatrium attached to it came to life in the depths of the ship. It sent a signal to a rotating dish on the outer deck, broadcasting its spell. A moment later, a tremendous shield formed in a bubble around the whole of Canterlot.

Guards on patrol outside the city who rushed back slammed headlong into the shield encasing the city. Pegasus citizens who attempted to flee were likewise repelled.

It soon became clear: nopony was getting in or out of Canterlot.

***

An off-duty Royal Guard, a gray unicorn stallion with green eyes, saw the airship hanging in the sky as he was eating his breakfast that morning.

“Oh,” he said simply.

Sitting across from him, a yellow pegasus mare with a green mane, spectacles, and ladybugs in a trail as her cutie mark raised her head. “Hm?” she murmured, still chewing the bite of toast with marmalade she’d just taken. “What is it?”

Her companion pointed out the window behind her. She turned and froze, staring at the sight.

“Oh.”

The stallion got up and went for his armor. “I am sorry that I will miss the events you had scheduled today,” he said as he dressed. “I was interested in the play you spoke of.”

“Something tells me it’s cancelled now anyway,” the mare said, watching him as worry lines crossed her face. “But even if not, I understand. You’ve got a job to do.”

“Yes,” he said matter-of-factly, going to the door.

“H-hey,” she said, her voice suddenly plaintive. “You watch your flank out there, okay?”

He turned and looked at her with confusion. “Would it not make more sense to face forward? Monitoring my posterior is of dubious tactical value.”

She sighed, shaking her head. “I meant that you should be careful, Idol,” she said.

“Ah, I see,” he said. He remembered to give her a reassuring smile. “Do not worry, Topaz. I will return unharmed.”

She watched him wordlessly as he dashed out the front door, galloping into the street to confront the invading force.

***

“Shield in place!” the tactical officer called.

“Sir, the lookout reports a squadron of pegasus guards approaching from the starboard beam!” the communications officer called.

“Engage and repel them at once!” Commander Hiker barked.

“Just give them a small taste,” Cobbler said, his face stern. “Enough to send a message, but not enough to be deadly.”

“Aye, sir!” the tactical officer said, pressing another button at his station. “Gunners to the ready! Enemy combatants approaching from the starboard beam!”

***

The pegasus guards were approaching the ship, intending to assess its capabilities if they could, perhaps even to board and take over the bridge if an opportunity presented itself.

As they approached, however, panels all around the rim of the ship slid open. Ponies sat at chairs manning strange-looking weapons of some kind. They were shaped like cannons, but the barrels were lined with a series of metal rings and had chrome spheres at their ends.

“Evasive maneuvers!” the squad leader called.

A moment later, the gunners fired. Bolts of lightning shot forth. Two of the guards were struck and dropped out of the sky, plummeting toward the ground below.

“Guards down!” the commander shouted, swooping down after the falling guards.

The others followed suit, rescuing their companions. They eyed the gunners above warily, but a second salvo never followed.

“Sir, what are your orders?” a guard asked the commander.

“We couldn’t even get close before they ghosted us,” the commander growled as he hefted the unconscious guard. “We need to retreat and plan a different means of approach.”

“But sir--”

“You want to risk your comrades, guard?!” the commander shouted. “We’re no good to Her Majesty if we’re dead! Retreat back to the castle and regroup! And somepony find a medic!”

***

Celestia watched in horror through a window as the guards were repelled, only breathing when she saw that the squad was able to rescue those who had been shot down.

“Your Majesty!” shouted a guard. “Please, we must get you to safety!”

Celestia nodded as she and the guards made their way to the War Room. Upon arriving, she saw with relief that Luna was there as well.

“Celestia!” Luna cried, going over to her. “Thank goodness you are all right!”

Celestia laid her neck against her sister’s, enfolding her with her large wings. “Luna,” she said, breathing a sigh of relief. “I’m glad to see you too.”

The Captain of the Guard approached them, saluting.

“Your Majesties!” the captain said.

Celestia stood before him. “Your report, Captain?”

“The delegates have all been moved to secure locations around the castle,” the captain said. “There has been no attack on any part of the palace, but that seems not to be their goal. However, reports are coming in that the Royal Guard have been attacked in key locations across Canterlot. I regret to report that the news is grim: nearly every member of the Guard outside the palace has either been captured or is pinned down by the enemy forces. The enemy has essentially gained control over the entire city.”

Celestia gawked at him. “Impossible,” she breathed.

“There’s more,” he said, bowing his head. “Princess Luna, the Night Guard has likewise been cut off or captured. Furthermore, we sent a force to secure an evacuation route through the crystal caverns below Canterlot, but it seems somepony has booby trapped the tunnels: explosives and mines have been set, making evacuation suicidal. Whoever did it most likely did so in advance of the attack.”

Celestia swallowed. “What of the populace?” she asked.

“The invading forces do not appear to be targeting civilians,” the captain said.

Celestia and Luna both breathed a mutual sigh of relief.

“That’s some good news, at least,” Luna said.

“Yes, but what I don’t understand is what these invaders want,” Celestia said. She closed her eyes, rubbing her chin. “It’s no doubt that these are the same conspirators we’ve been tracking, the ones who created Turing Test and then abducted her from Ponyville.”

“All our information indicates they oppose your rule, Your Majesty,” the captain said. Then, turning to Luna, he added, “And likely yours as well, Princess Luna.”

She scowled. “Traitors!” she spat. “Do they not realize that without us to raise the sun and moon--”

“I believe they have that covered, sister,” Celestia said, turning to her. “These ponies most likely created the device that raised the sun during the evening we took in Turing Test’s play.”

“Ah,” Luna said, her realization dawning. “But if they wish to depose us, then why have they attacked everywhere except the palace?”

“An attack could still be imminent,” the captain said. Then he knelt before them. “Forgive me, Your Majesties, but all we have at the moment are the guards who were already on duty in the castle and a few who managed to escape the invaders. We estimate our forces are scarcely more than one hundred guards in total. We are not many, but we will protect you with our lives, if necessary.”

“I hope and pray that it will not be,” Celestia said gravely. “But thank you, Captain. Your loyalty is greatly appreciated.”

Just then, another guard ran into the War Room. “Sir! Your Majesties!” she shouted. “The enemy has deployed strange devices all over Canterlot. They appear to be utilizing radio to broadcast a signal. They say they will be making a statement in less than five minutes!”

***

All across the city of Canterlot, ponies in their homes went to their windows or walked out into the street. Drones hovering on propellers carried speakers that loudly announced their message:

“Attention ponies of Canterlot: do not be alarmed! We will be issuing a message explaining our intent shortly. Please remain calm. You will not be harmed. If possible, please focus your attention on the airship above Canterlot. Repeating… Attention ponies of Canterlot…”

The populace, at least those whose fear was not enough to overcome their curiosity, or was at least reduced enough by the invaders’ promise that no harm would come to them, did as they asked and looked to the ship looming in the sky like a dark, colossal bird of prey.

A few minutes later, the projector screens changed and the grainy, black and white image of an older stallion wearing a top hat appeared on the screen. As he spoke on the screen, his voice was broadcast over the radio drones.

“Good morning, citizens of Canterlot,” he said. “Through the miracle of technology, I am broadcasting this message live. I reiterate: this is not a prerecorded message.

“Allow me to introduce myself. I am Professor Cobbler Mustang, namesake of the region of Mustangia, peach farmer, businesspony, scientist, and, at one time, a father. But today, I come to you as the President of the Nation of TechQuestria, a nation built in secret in the caverns below Mustangia.

“Our nation is a refuge for inventors and freethinkers who have suffered in Equestria and had nowhere else to go. We are scientists and engineers who’ve seen their ambitions crushed or left to die on the vine. And all this is thanks to the system of government which left their fates in the hooves of a single pony. That pony has ruled over the nation for a thousand years, but her unwillingness to accept change has left our beloved Equestria languishing in stagnation. I refer, of course, to Her Royal Majesty, Princess Celestia.”

He paused, keeping his face stern as that last part sank in. The ponies in the streets all began to murmur and talk amongst themselves. Some scoffed at this mad pony, while others silently began to fear for the princess’s safety, and still others only listened with curiosity, wondering what Cobbler was talking about.

After a moment, Cobbler continued his address:

“Now, I understand many of you will not understand my words, or wonder what grievance we could possibly have against one of the most beloved ponies in all Equestria. Well, during the next few hours, we will be broadcasting some films explaining the stories of some of our citizens as well as the wondrous creations which we will offer to the ponies of Equestria. We urge you to watch and listen. We intend to show you what Equestria has been denied by leaving its rule in the hooves of a single, ancient pony, and then we will let you glimpse the miracles that science has wrought. We are liberators, not conquerors, though you may not yet understand what we’re liberating you from. Regardless, I assure you that you will not suffer: your lives will only get better. The sooner you realize that, the sooner it will be.

“And now to Princess Celestia herself, I have a message just for you: we will be sending a private communication shortly to the Royal Ballroom. We ask that you gather the delegates from the National Conference there as well, as the message pertains to them. We do not intend any further violence.”

Here he paused, removing his hat, softening his gaze as he stared into the camera. “I promise you this: no harm will come to you or the delegates as long as you cooperate with this simple request. Please go there at your earliest convenience.

“That is all for now, Canterlot. While I realize many of you are frightened, I believe you will one day all look back on this day not as the end of an age, but as the dawn of a new one..”

***

Celestia watched the broadcast discreetly through the narrow window of a tower in the castle, Luna at her side.

“Professor Mustang,” she whispered, lowering her head. “I’d hoped I was wrong. I’d hoped your hatred had subsided. I never thought you would go this far…”

“Sister?” Luna asked.

Celestia shook her head. “I’ll explain later, Luna,” she said. To the Captain of the Guard, she said, “Captain, gather the delegates in the Royal Ballroom. Let’s hear what he has to say.”

The captain jerked his head back. “Your Majesty?” he asked. “You intend to dignify this traitor with a response?”

“Now, Captain,” she said sternly. “All I intend to do is listen. I will not put anypony at risk by stubbornly refusing a request.”

Luna eyed Celestia uncertainly, and even the captain paused for a moment before saluting her and carrying out her orders.

As the two princesses made their way to the Royal Ballroom, Luna glanced up at her sister, seeing the faraway look in her eyes.

“Do not worry, sister,” she said, forcing herself to smile in a manner she hoped looked reassuring. “I am certain that everything will be all right. Surely Twilight Sparkle and the others are on their way, and I know that one way or another, these traitors will be stopped and everything will return to normal.”

Celestia gave Luna a quick smile. “Yes, I’m sure you’re right,” she replied.

But her smile faded almost immediately. That’s a lie, she told herself. No matter what happens, nothing will ever be the same after today.

To be continued…

Author's Notes:

Look out! We're being invaded by references!

First of all, there's the title. Guess who's back, kids? That's right, it's Daft Punk!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YKaN7a19jLc
Turing posing in her "Draw My Like One of Your Prench Girls" position references the pose she tried to use to seduce Big Mac back in "Love Machine, Part 2" in case you forgot.
001 comments on being in storage by singing "It you sis in a box!" referencing the Lonely Island comedy song "Dick in a Box."
001's corruption of Rainbow Dash's name, "Fus Ro Dah!" references the shout attack from the game The Elder Scrolls V: Skyrim and, indirectly, the MLP fan video below (misheard song lyrics: "Rain Bow DAH! / Into Well! / F*cking Cool! / Oh My God! / Into Sky! / To Prepare! / Applaaaaauuuuussseee! / Oh Thank God Rainbow Saved Her!".
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XqRKCdhpIos
Sorry for the crap quality... this is literally the last instance of this video I've managed to find on the internet.
The New Dawn's design is loosely based on Iowa-class US battleships, such as the World War II-era USS Iowa BB-61.
Commander Hill Hiker is named after Commander Will Riker, First Officer of the Enterprise on Star Trek: The Next Generation.
Idol and Topaz are Idol Hooves and Topaz Showers, the two main characters of my absolute favorite story here on the site: The Changeling of the Guard by vdrake77. He was kind enough to give me permission to due a little cameo as an homage. If you haven't read his story, I cannot recommend it strongly enough. If you enjoy Turing's "fish out of water" type of story, I'm pretty sure you'll enjoy watching Idol Hooves, who's actually a changeling who's enlisted in the Royal Guard, figure out pony society.

See you all next time! Get ready because the end is almost here...

The Lionhearted, Part 1

View Online

“Aaaand we’re clear!” said the pony operating the camera.

Cobbler relaxed as the bulky video camera was lowered and the stage lights were turned down. The small media room where he and the crew were gathered was near the bridge and had been designed specifically to allow them to project their live broadcasts over a wide area. Assuming all had gone well, all of Canterlot was now absorbing their message.

“Excellent work, Mr. President!” Commander Hiker said, coming over to him with a warm smile. “We should be getting reports any minute now from agents on the ground.”

“Very good,” Cobbler said, adjusting his hat. “If the transmission was as clear as we’d hoped, then Celestia and the rest of the royal palace will be giving us an answer.”

“What do we do if she refuses to listen, sir?” Hiker asked.

“Celestia isn’t one to run or hide. That’s one thing I’ll give her,” Cobbler replied, chuckling. “Just give her a few minutes and--”

“Mr. President! Commander Hiker!” shouted the communications officer as she ran into the media room. “Reports on the ground indicate that the transmission was perfectly clear. The entire city heard the message!”

The crew in the media room erupted into cheers. Cobbler’s chest swelled with pride.

“Well done, my friends,” Cobbler said. “Prepare to broadcast the technology showcases. Once we’ve contacted Celestia and issued our demands, we’ll also begin broadcasting our pro-democratic messages. Have our secret agents on the ground gauge the public’s response and attempt to steer any conversations in a more positive direction.”

“Not to worry, sir,” the communications officer said. “I’m certain everypony knows their role in all this!”

“Well, a little ol’ reminder won’t hurt anypony,” Cobbler said jovially. “Commander Hiker, please return to the bridge and see to it our special message arrives just outside the ballroom. If you’ll excuse me, I need a moment to prepare myself in my cabin.”

Hiker nodded, but paused before turning to go. “Sorry, sir, but your cabin? Are you all right?” he asked.

Cobbler laughed, waving him off. “Oh, don’t worry yourself about me,” he said. “I just need a few minutes to prepare myself to address Celestia and the delegates. I’ve found that taking a few minutes to catch one’s breath before an important meeting has its benefits. I must admit I’m a bit tense now that this moment has arrived. I have been anticipating it for the last ten years, after all.”

Hiker bowed his head. “Of course, sir,” he said. “I’ll notify you when we’re ready.”

Cobbler tipped his hat to Hiker and made his way to his private cabin while the others continued to make preparations.

Once he was alone, Cobbler sat down at the small desk placed in the corner of the small room. Though he was privileged to have his own quarters to himself, the cabin wasn’t much larger than anypony else’s. It contained a sink, a small closet, a toilet, a bed, and his writing desk.

Sitting at the desk, he took a deep breath and leaned back in his chair, closing his eyes. He exhaled slowly, relaxing as he waited for the bridge to message him.

After a few moments of quiet, he reached into his coat and removed a small locket on a chain. He opened it, revealing a picture of his daughter inside.

“We’re almost there, Georgia,” he whispered. “It won’t be long now before I finally get you the justice you deserve. The ponies of Equestria will know what you died for.”

He shut his eyes, holding the locket to his heart.

“Soon, we will all be free.”

It won’t work.

He jerked his head back, looking around in surprise. He’d just heard a voice. A whisper, really.

Only one way.

He felt a dull ache in his head. It swiftly grew into a sharp, stabbing pain, and he winced, shutting his eyes as he rubbed his temple.

“What--” he gasped. “What’s happening--”

You know. Do it. Only one way...

The pain suddenly vanished, and he gasped, feeling as though he’d just surfaced after a long dive. But not only was the pain gone, but in its place there was a strangely tranquil feeling. He felt serene, driven, and almost euphoric.

His eye twitched, and for a moment there was a flash of color before his eyes.

There was a knock at the door.

He shut the locket and put it back in his coat. “Yes?” he called.

Commander Hiker opened the door. “We’re ready for you, sir,” he said. “If you’re feeling ready, that is.”

He grinned broadly as he got to his hooves. He went over to Hiker and put his hoof on his shoulder.

“Why, Mr. Hiker… I’ve never felt better!”

***

Turing Test quickly assessed the situation: Sergeant Sea Hawk was still holding Twilight Sparkle, a spear held to her neck. Though it was possible for her to act quickly enough to knock the spear away, she calculated that there was approximately a 46% chance that Sea Hawk would react in time and possibly injure Twilight.

Or worse, she realized. The risk is too great. Furthermore, even if I am able to free Twilight Sparkle, the other Royal Guards may retaliate by harming Spike the Dragon, Rarity, or Fluttershy. I cannot allow that. I cannot act.

She heard more sounds coming from the open bay from which the New Dawn had risen. Over the rim, she saw a group of TechQuestrian security forces emerging. They seemed to be calling for more help.

“It seems reinforcements are arriving,” Sea Hawk said, noticing them as well. “Hold steady, guards!”

“Sir, yes sir!” they all replied.

“Take your hooves off me!” Rarity shrieked, struggling as Orange Slice held her. “It’s bad enough being captured by brainwashed Royal Guards, but you smell as though you haven’t bathed since yesterday!”

“I’m not brainwashed!” Orange Slice snarled, his cheeks reddening. “Besides, we couldn’t take a bath because we were up all night guarding Celestia’s new cruise ship! And you punks are gonna pay when those cabana boys in gray show up!”

“Oh come on!” Spike groaned, rolling his eyes. “Don’t tell me you all still think--hrk!”

“That’s enough out of you, scaly!” Violet Wisp growled, gripping him in an even tighter chokehold.

“Spike!” Twilight cried. “Don’t you dare hurt him!”

“You do and you’ll regret it!” Gadget added, raising her mechanical arms menacingly.

“Don’t even think about it, you eight-limbed traitor!” Violet Wisp shouted back, sneering at her. “After this is over, you’ll wish you still had four extra hands to help with all the hard labor you’ll be doing!”

Fluttershy, meanwhile, opted for simply tapping her captor, Buttercup, on the foreleg. Granted, the massive pony was simply holding her in said foreleg like a bundle of sticks, pinning her wings.

“Um, Mr. Buttercup, sir?” she asked. “Do you think you could loosen your grip a little? It’s hard to breathe.”

He frowned down at her. “Oh, I’m sorry, Miss, but I have orders to hold you as tight as I can until we take you in,” he replied. “Really sorry, but it’s my job.”

Fluttershy nodded. “I understand,” she said. “I’m sorry for asking.”

“No, I’m sorry I made you ask.”

“I’m sorry that--”

“Enough with the sorries!” Rainbow Dash shouted. “Can’t you idiots see those ponies in the gray uniforms aren’t cabana boys?! Those are TechQuestrian guards! They’re trying to take over Equestria!”

“Nice try, traitor,” Sea Hawk scoffed. “Listen, we don’t want to hurt anypony. Everyone just relax and this will all go much easier.”

“But those just can’t be cabana boys!” Pinkie cried, pointing at the advancing security forces. “They all look super mean and they’re wearing gray! Cabana boys don’t wear gray!”

“True,” Rarity added, tapping her chin. “In my experience, they’re usually dressed in semi-casual uniforms, or striped naval shirts. Although, I once went to this private estate where they were all wearing-- ah, but perhaps this isn’t the best time to discuss it.” She wore a grin, however, and her cheeks colored as she got a far-off dreamy look.

“Oh for crying out loud,” Umahara groaned, smacking himself in the forehead. “I always heard the Elements of Harmony were some great warriors, but we’re about to be captured and you’re arguing about what cabana boys wear!”

“Banana hammocks!” 001 cried.

Umahara’s eye twitched.

“Well, I don’t see you coming up with any ideas either!” Gadget snapped, never taking her eyes off the guards even as the security forces neared them.

“Perhaps some of us could repel the oncoming security guards,” Turing suggested.

“You’ll stay right there!” Sea Hawk barked. “You make even one move, and you’ll regret it!” He poked Twilight with the tip of the spear, drawing a tiny dot of blood just to make his point clear.

“No hurt!” 001 shouted, about to run at him. “No hurt Tailai!”

“001, do not move!” Turing shouted, seeing that she was about to pounce forward.

She looked to her sister and then to Twilight and then back again, tilting her head in confusion. “He hurt Tailai! Me stop him!”

Twilight gulped, but tried to smile. “I-it’s okay, 001,” she said. “Really, I’m fine!”

“This is getting out of hoof,” Gadget whispered to Umahara. “Isn’t there anything we can do?”

“Not so long as they’re brainwashed!” he hissed back.

“Well, isn’t there some way we can snap them out of it?” she cried, raising her voice.

“Like what?!” he snapped.

“How should I know?!” she shot back. “I already tried yelling ‘It is as Celestia wills it: stop being brainwashed!’ and that sure didn’t work!”

He gawked at her. “Why the heck would that ever work?!” he yelled, giving up all pretense of whispering to her. “You really thought it would be as easy as saying ‘It is as Celestia wills it: stop being brainwashed!’?!”

The four Royal Guards’ eyes momentarily went blank, and they began to blink. Their grips loosened.

“Whoa,” Violet Wisp muttered, letting Spike drop from her grasp. “I just got a weird head rush.”

“Yeah, me too,” Orange Slice said, rubbing his temple. “Hey, anyone feel less brainwashed all of a sudden?”

“Oh, I sure do!” Buttercup exclaimed, raising his hoof and waving it wildly (dropping Fluttershy in the process). “I feel pretty good, actually! Not brainwashed at all!”

“What the… Private Buttercup!” Sea Hawk shouted. “Were you carrying that mare under your foreleg like common luggage?!”

Buttercup looked down at Fluttershy, who was picking herself off the ground and dusting herself off. “I-it’s okay,” she said, smiling up at him. “You didn’t hurt me, Mr. Buttercup!”

“Oh! Oh my goodness!” Buttercup gasped as he covered his mouth in horror. “Oh, I am so so sorry! I don’t know how that happened!”

“Ha!” Violet Wisp laughed. “Hey, Orange Slice, looks like even Buttercup is better at ‘picking up’ girls than you!”

“Sh-shut up!” Orange Slice shot back.

“A-hem,” Rarity said, making a pointed cough as she elbowed Orange Slice in the ribs.

“What the--whoa!” Orange Slice said, letting Rarity go as Violet Wisp held her belly with laughter. “Oh, jeez, I’m sorry, Miss.”

“That’s quite all right,” Rarity said, waving him off. “Not your fault, Private Orange Slice.”

“Well she might forgive you, but I don’t!” Sea Hawk bellowed. “Two of my officers found mare-handling two of the Elements of Harmony, our personal guests! When I get through with you two--”

“Uh, Sarge?” Buttercup said, clearing his throat. “You, um… might want to look down…”

Sea Hawk blinked, then looked down. He was holding Princess Twilight Sparkle and pointing a spear at her throat.

“Oh,” he breathed, releasing his magical hold on the spear, letting it drop to the ground. He then dropped to his knees, bowing deeply. “Princess Twilight! I’m terribly sorry! I don’t know how this happened! Guards, on your knees!”

They all snapped to attention and knelt before Twilight, who quickly urged them to get back to their hooves.

Meanwhile, Gadget broke out into a wide smile. “You did it, Umahara! Nice thinking!”

She turned to him and saw that he was staring at the scene with his jaw hanging open. A small croak escaped him as he tried to think of what to say.

“Um, Umahara?”

“HOW?!” he shouted abruptly. “How in the world did that actually work?!”

“I guess they were still programmed to think of you as a member of TechQuestria,” she said, shrugging her shoulders. “Don’t let it get to you, just be happy it worked!”

“I…” He heaved a sigh, giving her a smile. “I guess you’re right.”

“Well, I’m glad that that’s settled,” Rainbow Dash said, hovering just above them. “Now, uh, maybe we should take care of these guys.”

Sea Hawk looked up at her. “What guys, Miss Rainbow Dash?”

“I believe she is referring to the large group of security guards who are about to overtake us,” Turing Test replied, pointing with her hoof.

Sea Hawk and the others turned and stared at the dozens of guards charging at them across the grassy field.

“They mad?” 001 asked, looking to Applejack.

“They sure look that way, sugarcube,” Applejack sighed, patting her on the head.

Sea Hawk gritted his teeth and narrowed his eyes.

“Princess Twilight,” he whispered. “I apologize for not being up on the current situation, but I take it these ponies wish to do you harm and were responsible for the abduction of your friend?”

Twilight nodded.

“Then, for now, that’s all I need to know.” He brought his hoof to his mouth and let out a shrill whistle. “Royal Guards! Defensive positions!”

“Sir, yes sir!” they shouted in reply.

The four guards formed a line before Twilight and the others in an instant.

“Guards, protect the princess and the others at all costs! We must not let them come to harm under any circumstances! We will regain our honor as Royal Guards and make these criminals pay for using us!”

“Sir, yes sir!” they shouted, digging in their feet as they prepared to meet the attackers head on.

But just before sounding the charge, Sea Hawk saw Turing Test stand beside him.

“Though your bravery is admirable,” she said, “you will require assistance. I will be glad to help you.” She paused a moment, then put out her hoof to him. “I am Turing Test, by the way. When this is over, I hope we can become friends.”

Sea Hawk looked at her for a moment, then smiled, bumping her hoof. “Pleased to meet you. I hear you pack a wallop.”

“I am not familiar with ‘wallop’ as a unit of measurement.”

“I think he just means you can kick some flank,” Gadget explained, standing next to her, swapping her mechanical hands out for her weapons. “I could go for a little flank-kicking myself,” she added, smirking

“Now we’re talking!” Rainbow Dash said, landing next to Orange Slice, cracking her neck.

Soon they were all standing in a line, even as Sea Hawk tried to protest.

“You’re civilians!” he exclaimed. “Please, leave this to us and--”

“Sergeant Sea Hawk,” Twilight said, placing her hoof on his shoulder. “I’ve learned to place my trust in my friends. I’d advise you to do the same.” She smiled warmly.

He returned the smile. “As you wish, Your Highness,” he said. “All right then, everypony, let’s teach them a lesson! Begin charge on my command!

“Three… two… one… ch--”

“Cheese balls!!” 001 shouted, suddenly running ahead of them.

Sea Hawk blinked. “Well, come on, everypony, you heard her! Cheese balls!”

They ran at the enemy to meet them head on.

***

As the ponies of Canterlot stood in the streets or stayed in their homes watching the gigantic airship circling overhead, they saw the screens come to life as a new broadcast began.

The image displayed text that read “What Do We Stand For?” as upbeat music began to play.

A stylishly dressed mare and stallion appeared on the screen, smiling at the audience.

“Hello there, everypony!” said the stallion. “I’m Sprocket Rocket, and today I’m going to answer some questions you’re probably asking right now! Things like ‘Who are these ponies?’ and ‘What do they want?’ Well, not to worry, because I’m here to explain it all!”

The scene then changed to show a photograph of Dearborn Crumble’s farming automaton.

“See this mechanical pony?” Sprocket Rocket asked. “Sure is funny looking, isn’t it? But a hundred years ago, a pony named Dearborn Crumble created it to help farmers plow their fields.”

A clip of the farming automaton in action as it plowed a field was shown.

“By some estimates, farmers could have gotten 20% more work done just with this device. More work done, more tasty food, like the kind you and I enjoy every day!”

The image changed to a picture of a happy family of ponies sitting down to a bountiful dinner.

“But Princess Celestia dismissed it, discouraging the technology from ever taking off…”

A picture of Princess Celestia was displayed as the music became dissonant and tense.

“She worried that reliance on machines would put ponies out of jobs and cause widespread poverty. But now I’d like you to look at this…”

The picture showed a bowl of peaches.

“Tasty peaches!” Sprocket continued as the image shifted to show more peach products. “Canned peaches! Dried peaches! And for some of you older ponies, maybe a little bit of peach brandy? What do they all have in common, you might ask?

“Well, if you’ve enjoyed any of these, chances are they came from the Mustang Peach family orchard in Mustangia! That’s right, over 90% of all peaches come from one place in Equestria! How is that possible? The answer is our old friend technology!”

The screen showed clips of the harvesters rumbling between rows of trees. The pony driving a harvester tipped his hat and smiled to the camera. There was a transition, and the screen displayed Cobbler’s busy canning factory at work.

“Thanks to technology, more peaches can be grown, picked, and processed now than at any time before in history! And just look at all these ponies working hard to make it happen! They sure aren’t out of a job, are they? In fact, by expanding production through automation, even more ponies are employed than ever! And you might be surprised to hear that they’re better paid than any other farm workers in Equestria! Why, many of them make even more than a laborer right here in Canterlot!”

Down below, some of the common laborers who’d been listening halfheartedly took a new interest. A bootblack here, a street sweeper there, a few restaurant workers, gardeners, and others all began to wonder how a mere farmhoof or factory worker could do better than they could in Equestria’s most illustrious city.

“So much for technology putting ponies out of work!” Sprocket said, giving a shrug as he looked pointedly into the camera. “But of course that’s just for farm workers. Many of you might be wondering what technology could do for you. Well, let me ask: how many of you have friends or family in other places in Equestria? Wouldn’t you like to talk to them more often without waiting for a letter or paying the price for an impersonal telegram? What if you could speak to them whenever you want?”

The screen showed an elderly unicorn mare sitting in her chair as a telephone next to her rang. She picked it up and said “Hello?”

The screen split and showed a young stallion speaking on the other end. “Hi, Mom!” he said. “I just wanted to say happy birthday!”

“Why son, that’s so nice of you! It’s good to hear your voice all the way in Vanhoover!”

“And I’ve got wonderful news: you’re going to be a grandmare!”

“Oh!” the elder mare cried, putting her hoof over her heart. “I’m so happy to hear that! I love you, son…”

The ponies watching below were transfixed. Many of them did indeed have relatives who lived far away, and waiting days and weeks for letters suddenly just seemed so… slow.

Sprocket Rocket appeared on screen again, this time walking down the main street of Mustang City. “Sound like a fantasy? In fact, it’s very real! It’s called the ‘telephone,’ and right here in Mustangia, it’s a part of daily life!”

The screen showed images of ponies in their homes and businesses in Mustangia chatting happily on their phones interspersed with an animation showing how their conversations were transmitted over electrical phone lines.

“Would you believe that Princess Celestia called this modern miracle, and here I quote, ‘A toy’?” He shook his head pityingly. “What a loss for Equestria… but it doesn’t have to be that way.

“We, the ponies of TechQuestria, saw the potential for this wonder, and we want to bring it, and many others, to all of you! But it sure makes you wonder… what other innovations have you been missing? How powerful could our nation have become if technology had been allowed to flourish?

“That’s the question our President, Cobbler Mustang, has been asking,” Sprocket Rocket said. “And he didn’t let anypony tell him to stop dreaming! And so he kept up his family tradition of building automata… and I bet you all know what he built…”

The newspaper front page with a picture of Turing Test was displayed, the headline calling her by the sensationalized name, “The Iron Horse.” A montage of images of Turing Test played shortly after.

“It looks like the Mustang family tradition is still going strong,” Sprocket continued. “So imagine a world with labor-saving automata, greater wealth, more leisure time, and the ability to communicate with your loved ones no matter where they are. It’s just the first step towards the future we’re bringing to you, the citizens of Equestria!”

The clip ended. The ponies below began to talk...

***

“An interesting film,” Luna remarked, scowling. She looked up at her sister standing next to her. “It seems they aren’t holding back on you, sister.”

Celestia sighed. “No,” she replied. “It seems not.”

The two princesses stood in the Royal Ballroom before the ornately gilded double doors leading out into the gardens, a group of Royal Guards standing before them, ready for whatever message or messenger to be sent from the gargantuan ship looming above.

The delegates of the National Conference were gathered in the room behind them. Most had grouped into small clusters and were talking amongst themselves in hushed tones about the film they’d watched from the windows of the castle, radio drones circling the palace playing the audio for them, as well as whatever the TechQuestrians had in store.

Celestia heard the words they whispered, perhaps thinking that she didn’t hear them: “coup,” “terrorists,” “attack,” “prisoners,” and one more word that was said the most quietly, but which filled her with more dread than all the others…

“War.”

She shut her eyes, taking a deep breath.

“I hear them as well, Celestia,” Luna whispered without looking at her. “They are frightened.”

“I do not blame them,” Celestia whispered back. “But we must show no fear in front of them. Our strength will be theirs.”

“Indeed,” Luna said. Then, strangely, she grinned. “Part of me almost wants to hear what sort of outlandish demands these ponies intend to make. Is that what they now call ‘morbid curiosity?’”

Celestia did not return her grin. “I doubt we will find their demands very amusing, Luna,” she said. “And if we deny them, their retaliation could be even worse than what we’ve seen.”

Luna fell silent as she looked away. “I’m sorry,” she muttered. “I didn’t mean--”

“It’s all right,” Celestia said, giving her a calm smile. “No matter how dire things get, I feel much better having you here, Luna. In years past, I was not always so fortunate.”

Luna relaxed and smiled back.

But their smiles vanished as a guard shouted, “Incoming object sighted!”

The two princesses stiffened, looking out through the windows as the guards readied their spears and swords, standing at the ready. Some of the unicorns among them had already energized their magic, horns glowing as they engaged shield spells. Many of the delegates let out cries of panic and some darted back from the windows.

Through the glow of the magical shields and the tall windows of the ballroom, they spotted an object slowly descending from the ship. It was another of the strange machines - drones - that flew using a propeller. This one was fairly large, however, standing almost as tall as Celestia herself, and was covered in gold-colored plating. It was vaguely cylindrical in shape and bulkier than the others as well, and it bore the large emblem of TechQuestria on its front.

They all watched as the machine slowly came down, the buzz from the spinning propeller atop it grew louder and louder and the wind it kicked up made the windows rattle. When it at last landed, the blades began to slow until they stopped entirely. They then folded up neatly and retracted into the machine. The machine was on caterpillar treads, and it slowly began to roll up to the doors of the ballroom.

When nopony opened the doors, a panel on the side of it slid open and a mechanical arm extended. It raised a mechanical hand and knocked on the door as if it were no more than a neighbor come to borrow a cup of sugar.

The captain of the guards looked back at Celestia.

“Keep the shields up, but open the doors for it,” Celestia said.

The captain nodded. “Understood, Your Majesty,” he said.

He undid the lock on the doors and opened them.

The machine moved more quietly than they would have expected, given its size, but it still whirred as it entered the room and came to a stop just before the line of guards, their magical shields still up.

A speaker on the front of the cylindrical machine crackled and came to life. A voice came through it.

“Good morning, my dear friends!” came Cobbler’s jovial drawl. “I am delighted that you’ve chosen to receive our ‘messenger.’”

Celestia narrowed her eyes. It wasn’t as though you gave us a choice, she thought, but kept such words to herself.

“Now then,” Cobbler said, clearing his throat, “I do believe we should get to business. I take it Celestia is there?”

The guards all looked to Celestia, but their princess did not move from her spot.

“Come now, Celestia, I may not be able to see you, but I can hear the mutterings in that room,” Cobbler said, chuckling to himself. “You wouldn’t leave a guest talking to himself, now would you? You have my word that there’s no danger; I only wish to talk.”

Celestia raised her hoof, and the guards parted way for her as she approached the machine.

“Hello, Professor Mustang,” she said quietly. “It’s been a long time.”

There was a pause.

“Yes. It most certainly has. Over ten long years.” Another pause. “I wonder, does it seem like a long time to you? It’s a sixth of my life, but to one as long-lived as you… well, it must seem like it was just yesterday.”

“I remember our meeting very well, Professor,” she said, “if that’s what you’re asking.”

“As do I,” Cobbler replied. “Of course, I realized that you remembered me when you sent your guards to investigate me shortly after Unit 003 was discovered. And again after the incident in Manehattan. You had suspicions of me from the beginning… was it a guilty conscience, I wonder?

“And yet, despite your suspicions, your guards were never able to discover our little operation.”

Celestia heard chuckles over the radio, no doubt the ponies nearby laughing at Cobbler’s pointed observation.

“You certainly must have kept yourselves well-hidden,” Celestia said. Then she smiled. “You’re apparently very good at hiding.”

“I like to think that we were ‘secluded,’ and in doing so we’ve bettered ourselves through our science and training. Unlike your forces, which we’ve overwhelmed with ease.”

Celestia’s smile vanished. “For the moment,” she said.

“Well, we’ll just see how long this lasts,” Cobber said. “Let’s move on to business--”

“First,” Celestia said sternly, cutting him off, “where are Twilight Sparkle and her friends?”

“They’re fine, I assure you,” Cobbler replied. “I must admit, they gave us a bit of trouble, but they’re back in our custody. You needn’t worry: we did not harm her or her friends, nor do we intend to. My compliments on your protégée, Celestia; Princess Twilight is a remarkable young mare.”

“Yes. Yes, she is,” Celestia said darkly. “And what of Turing Test?”

Cobbler sighed. “That’s not important to--”

“It most certainly is!” Celestia shouted. “You abducted a citizen of Equestria, Professor Mustang! Whether you built her or not is irrelevant!”

“Unit 003 is a machine,” Cobbler said, and though she couldn’t see him, Celestia could almost hear him rolling his eyes. “Surely you’re not saying that for all your low opinions of technology that you seriously equate an automaton with a real pony?”

“Just a moment!” cried a new voice.

Celestia and the guards turned to see Fancy Pants emerging from the crowd.

“I beg your pardon, Your Majesty,” he said, bowing to her, “but as I understand it, this stallion is Turing Test’s creator, isn’t he?”

“It would seem so,” Celestia replied.

“I am indeed,” Cobbler said, “but who exactly are you?”

“My name is Fancy Pants,” he said, “and I am the chosen delegate for the city of Canterlot!”

“Ah,” Cobbler said, scoffing audibly. “Another one of the Canterlot elite.”

Fancy Pants puffed himself up at Cobbler’s mocking tone. “Whatever you think of me is irrelevant,” he said, “but I take exception at your disregard for Miss Turing Test! She helped to save my life several months ago! Were it not for her and Miss Rainbow Dash, my companions and I would surely have died in the mountains. I consider her a friend, and I demand to know her whereabouts and her condition!”

“That is not why we--”

“I agree with Fancy Pants!” said a new voice.

They turned and saw that Mayor Mare had come to Fancy’s side.

“This is Mayor Mare of Ponyville!” she declared. “You’ve abducted several valued members of our community! Nearly every pony in town came to Turing Test’s aid when she was in danger, and that other robot you sent injured several Ponyville citizens! I don’t know who you are and what you want, but I also demand you tell us where Turing Test is!”

Celestia smirked. “Well, Professor Mustang?” she asked. “It seems your creation has made quite a few friends.”

Cobbler was silent for a moment. When he spoke again, there was a dark edge to his voice.

“So much sentiment over a machine,” he said. “Even you, Celestia. I wonder… where was that compassion when it came to my family? Especially my daughter.”

Celestia narrowed her eyes, heaving a sigh. “Professor Mustang… I am sorry for what happened to her.”

“I wonder,” Cobbler continued, “how many of your subjects gathered there know what you did? I wonder how you’ll explain yourself when everypony knows.”

“I did what I had to do,” she said. “Or, at least, what I thought was right.”

“So… no regrets?” Cobbler asked quietly.

“I didn’t say that,” Celestia replied. “I simply made choices I felt were best at the time. I’ve learned that it’s often wise to make peace with the past.”

Here she glanced at Luna, smiling at her. Then she looked back at the machine.

“I would have hoped that you’d do the same.”

Again, there was silence, but when Cobbler spoke, his voice was like ice.

“You murdered my daughter, Celestia.”

The crowd of ponies gasped, and an eerie silence fell over the ballroom.

“No,” Celestia said, narrowing her eyes. “I did not.”

“It wasn’t enough that you ruined my granddad’s life’s work,” Cobbler continued. “Your stance against technological progress set this country back a century, but the fact that you stood in the way of me saving my child convinced me that you are a threat to us all.

“I created a technology that might have saved Georgia. Indeed, it actually did save her, for a time. If you had allowed it to be tested properly, she might be alive now. But at every turn, you made decisions that stood in the way. The artificial heart could have saved countless ponies’ lives, including Georgia’s.

“I watched my sweet baby girl die right in front of me, Celestia,” he said, his voice momentarily strained. “I wonder how many other ponies lost their families because of you. Oh, I’m glad to hear you remember me, Celestia… because I won’t ever forget you.”

Celestia shut her eyes. “So… this is about revenge?”

Cobbler gave a short, mirthless laugh. “No,” he said. “Make no mistake, Celestia… I despise you, and part of me would like nothing more than to see you suffer for what you did to my daughter.

“But I am simply here as the voice of a group of ponies who’ve suffered and languished under your rule. Their desire for freedom and prosperity for the nation is far greater than my thirst for revenge, so I shall put my feelings aside. We will offer you as much mercy and kindness as possible, Princess, but make no mistake: today is the very last day of your rule. No, we are here not for personal revenge, but for the benefit of all the ponies of the nation.”

Celestia drew in a breath, fixating her eyes on the machine. “Then what are your demands?”

“Simply put, we wish to reformulate Equestria’s government as a democratic republic.”

Luna burst out laughing, drawing stares from the others.

“Ah… I apologize,” she said. “It’s just that… a democracy? For an entire nation? The very idea that such a chaotic, disorganized form of governance for a nation our size would be effective is sheer lunacy!”

Some of the delegates began to mutter amongst themselves. Luna looked around, hearing the grumbles from others. Celestia gave her a disapproving look.

“Did… did I say something wrong?” she asked. “Sister, do you not agree with me?”

“It is not a matter of agreement or disagreement,” Celestia said. “But perhaps we should exercise a bit of discretion and diplomacy, sister.”

“I’m glad to hear you say that, Celestia,” Cobbler said. “Though I suspect that you share your younger sibling’s sentiments. In any case, we have something we’d like you to take a look at…”

A few compartments opened on the front of the drone. Drawers extended, revealing several papers folded and sealed with TechQuestria’s symbol.

Celestia levitated one of the documents out, opening it. She read the words at the top:

The Constitution of the Democratic Republic of Equestria

“So,” Celestia said, scanning the document as she spoke, “this is the constitution for the new government you’re proposing?”

“Exactly,” Cobbler replied. “It describes the election of representatives from different regions of Equestria, the passing of laws, the integration of the courts, and the election of a president. No more of this archaic aristocratic nonsense that we’ve clung to since the days of Princess Platinum. No more princesses at all, in fact.”

Luna was gritting her teeth, but she held her tongue.

Celestia had no outward reaction, but simply stood there, continuing to read the document.

“You want me to sign this?” Celestia asked.

“Indeed, we do,” Cobbler said. “Consider it your last act as Princess. Oh, and we’ll want Princess Luna to sign it as well.”

Luna’s nostrils flared, and she reared up, stomping her forehooves. “You would dare to dictate--”

“Luna!” Celestia said sharply. “Please…”

Luna shook her head. “Celestia, I will not cooperate with this! I cannot! To have this mad scientist threaten us and dictate such terms is intolerable!”

“I know how you feel,” Celestia said quietly. “But if we do not negotiate a peaceful end to this, I fear the outcome for our subjects. Please think of them, and hold your tongue, at least for now.”

Luna took a breath, about to say something back, but then she looked behind her at all the ponies gathered in that room. She realized her sister was right. As much as it hurt her pride to have Cobbler demand that she give up her title, she had to think of her subjects first and see if a solution could be found without provoking him.

“Very well,” Luna said, bowing her head. “Proceed.”

Celestia smiled. “Thank you,” she said. Then, turning back to the device, she said, “Professor Mustang, might I make a counterproposal?”

Cobbler hummed, apparently thinking it over. “Very well,” he said.

“I understand why you and your followers object to me,” she said. “In fact, in light of recent events, I… I have begun to question many of my past decisions. But there is no need for others to suffer for my actions.

“What if I were to surrender myself to you, and let Luna assume my role?”

A gasp went up from the crowd.

“Celestia, no!” Luna shouted.

Celestia raised her head, ignoring them. “Well, Professor Mustang? Will you accept me as a prisoner? Will that dissuade you from this course of action?”

There was silence on the other side. Then, after a moment, Cobbler began to chuckle.

“I must admit, Celestia, your proposal caught me off guard. I expected that you’d either acquiesce to our demands or outright reject them. But while your offer is a tempting one, at least to me personally, I’m afraid I cannot accept.

“While I won’t deny my personal vendetta, I am not here merely as a leader. As I said, I am here to represent the ponies that chose me. And what we want is a democracy. Nothing less will do. Besides, with all due respect, your sister is even less qualified to rule than you are.”

Luna kept her silence, but a vein in her forehead began to bulge.

“I don’t mean to insult you, Princess Luna,” Cobbler said. “But your duties as Princess of the Night haven’t exactly prepared you for a role in day-to-day governance. And you’re still about a thousand years out of date in the modern world. And, let’s not forget, you were once the villain known as Nightmare Moon.”

Luna paused. “I have not forgotten,” she whispered. “But I have made peace with it.”

“Good for you,” Cobbler said. “But you’re still unqualified to rule alone. And we oppose any rule by royalty, no matter who it is. No kings, no queens, no princes, no princesses.

“And now that we’ve addressed that, there’s one more thing to discuss…”

He cleared his throat, then spoke again, loud enough to be heard clearly across the ballroom. “Attention delegates of the National Convention! In the compartments of our drone, you’ll find multiple copies of the constitution. As you were chosen by your respective townships, cities, provinces, and regions, we ask that you serve your nation by signing this constitution as well.”

The crowd began to murmur. Some scoffed. Others loudly protested. Others voiced quiet misgivings. And still others simply kept quiet, waiting to hear Cobbler continue.

“Many of you, from what I can hear, are less than pleased with the prospect of signing this constitution. Well, you will be given some time to consider it. We will allow you two hours to read the document carefully, discuss it amongst yourselves, and then decide if you wish to sign it or not. We hope that you will agree to it, and then you’ll be allowed to return to your homes and inform them of the new government. Anypony who signs will be treated as an honorable representative and ambassador to their hometown.”

The mayor of Manehattan stepped forward. “And what if we say no?” he asked.

“That is your choice,” he said. “But if you aren’t willing to cooperate, then you may need to be taken into custody. And then we’ll bring your home regions into the new nation without your input. I think we can all agree that use of force is the last thing we want.”

The sounds of protest quieted down.

“Celestia, Luna, my dear delegates,” Cobbler continued, “I will make this plain: cooperate and we will not harm you. We will make certain that you are treated respectfully and made comfortable during this transition. But if you resist, I assure you that we are prepared to use force. You have yet to see even close to the full fury of our ship, and we know that the palace is not prepared to face our forces. If our demands are not met, we will invade Canterlot Castle and place all resistors under arrest.

“Keep that in mind, Celestia… civilian life in exile with your sister sounds quite a bit better than a dungeon, doesn’t it? We’ll even let you continue to raise the sun and moon if you wish. Of course, if you refuse or think that your abilities are a bargaining chip--”

“You have your device,” Celestia said. “You can raise the sun and moon yourself.”

“Precisely,” he said. “Now, we’ll leave you to discuss the matter. There’s a button on the side of the drone. Press it if you wish to contact us with any questions or the like. Otherwise, you have two hours. We hope you will choose what is best for the ponies of Equestria… and one day, you may all be celebrated for your role in the birth of a new nation.”

The transmission ended. Ponies began to clamor, shouting over one another as the room erupted into panic. The guards spread out, trying to quiet the delegates down.

Luna watched all this with rising fury. Finally she could take it no more and took a deep breath, reeling back.

“BE SILENT!!” she shouted in the Royal Canterlot Voice, bellowing loud enough to be mistaken for cannon fire.

The crowd all froze, staring at her.

“There,” she said, heaving a sigh. “Citizens of Equestria, whatever we do, we must be calm! Now then…”

She turned to Celestia, who still had her back to the crowd.

“Celestia?” Luna asked. “What do you think we should do?”

Celestia turned slowly to face them all. Her expression was still calm, but now there was a gravity to it.

“The National Conference was designed to be a chance for delegates and representatives to offer feedback and discuss matters of importance with their rulers,” Celestia said. “Right now, it seems we have a new topic to address.

“Guards, distribute the copies of this constitution to the delegates. We will all need to read exactly what they want us to agree to.”

The guards complied, taking up the documents and passing them out. In the center of it all, Celestia and Luna walked alongside one another.

“Should we prepare a counterattack?” Luna whispered to Celestia.

“As a precaution,” Celestia said. “But we should still read this document Professor Mustang sent us.”

Luna’s eyes bulged. “You mean you actually plan to consider this treacherous tract?!” she hissed.

“Luna,” she said tiredly, “don’t you understand that our actions today could result in a war?”

Luna blinked. “Yes, of course I do.”

“Then we should think very carefully about what we might be going to war over,” Celestia said.

There was the sound of a pony clearing her throat behind them, and they turned to see a short mare approaching them.

“I’m very sorry, Your Majesties,” she said. “I’m the delegate from Vanhoover, and I… I’m sorry, but that pony, Professor Mustang, said that he created an artificial heart to save his daughter’s life. And that you held it back, Princess Celestia. Is… is that true?”

Celestia frowned. “It is a bit more complicated than that, but… yes,” she said. “It is true.”

The delegate bowed her head, shutting her eyes. “Your Majesty, my cousin was recently diagnosed with a heart condition,” she said. “They say the waiting list for a new heart is very long. Could that pony’s artificial heart save his life?”

Celestia swallowed. “Perhaps,” she replied.

The delegate drew in a deep breath. “Thank you for telling me the truth, Your Majesty,” she said. “Forgive me for bothering you.”

She bowed as she walked away.

Luna looked up to Celestia and saw the pained expression on her face. “Celestia…”

“Come, Luna,” Celestia said, leading her away. “We have work to do.”

***

Sergeant Sea Hawk wiped the sweat from his brow as he caught his breath. All around him were the defeated, unconscious forms of the TechQuestrian security guards. The battle had been long and hard, but he and his soldiers had fought with everything they had and, in the end, they had won.

“I think that’s the last of them!” he said, raising his head. He allowed himself a smile. “Good work, guards! You make me proud to be your commanding officer!”

Buttercup, Violet Wisp, and Orange Slice all saluted him. “Sir, yes sir!”

“At ease,” he said, seeing they were just as out of breath as he.

Twilight came over to him, Turing Test at her side.

“Thank you for your help, Sergeant,” Twilight said.

“We just did our duty, Your Highness,” Sea Hawk replied, bowing to her. “Honestly, you and your friends are tougher than you look. I’ve never seen anypony as adept with magic as you, Princess Twilight.” He then turned to Turing Test. “And you lived up to your reputation as well. You moved so fast I could barely keep track of you!”

“That is true,” she said. “Organic speed and reflexes are noticeably inferior to robots’.”

“Turing,” Twilight said, giving her a sour look.

Turing tilted her head. “Have I said something inappropriate? I only spoke the truth.” She tapped her chin, then raised her hoof again. “Ah. Did my assertion seem like I was bragging? I apologize, I did not intend to.”

But Sea Hawk just chuckled. “Honestly, I’m just glad you were too fast for these villains, let alone myself,” he said. He extended a hoof. “But like I said earlier, it’s good to make your acquaintance, and it was an honor to fight alongside you as well.”

Turing bumped his hoof in return. “Thank you, Sergeant Sea Hawk,” she said.

“You know, with skills like those, you could go far in the Royal Guard,” he said.

This drew a frown from Twilight, but Turing shook her head before Twilight could respond.

“While I appreciate your esteem, and indeed my original purpose was to assume the role of Twilight Sparkle’s bodyguard while gathering information on her, I would not be happy as a guard. Though I have proficiency with combat, I find all violence distasteful, even when necessary.”

Twilight smiled and put her foreleg over Turing’s shoulder, resting her head on her robotic companion. “I’m glad to hear you say that, Turing,” she said. “I think I would worry about you all the time if you were a member of the Royal Guard.”

“Ha!” Orange Slice guffawed, overhearing the conversation. “You sound like my mom, Princess Twilight!”

Twilight blushed and shot him a look that silenced him immediately.

“Well, that’s fair,” Sea Hawk said to Turing Test. “But in that case, what do you want to do with your life?”

Turing’s eyes constricted for a moment. “Do?” she repeated. “I… I am not certain. Twilight Sparkle is still my end user and caretaker, but I believe she would allow me to do anything I wished, and…”

“Turing,” Twilight said quietly. “You don’t have to decide right now. You can do anything you want.”

“Even join the Royal Guard?” she asked, raising one ear.

Twilight rolled her eyes. “Even join the Royal Guard,” she sighed.

Once everypony had a chance to recover, they began to gather together.

“All right,” Twilight said, addressing them all. “Now that we’ve beaten back those guards, we need to figure out what to do.”

“I’ll tell you what we do!” Rainbow Dash shouted, taking to the air as she punched one hoof into the other. “We get to Canterlot and take Cobbler and the rest of his cronies down!”

“Yeah!” Orange Slice yelled, raising a hoof as he took to the air and chest-bumped Rainbow Dash enthusiastically.

“I agree,” Twilight said, “but the question is how?”

Rainbow Dash and Orange Slice fell silent. Indeed, nopony had anything to say to that.

“Well,” Applejack began, “couldn’t ya teleport us back to Canterlot yerself, Twilight?”

Twilight shook her head. “Teleporting this many ponies at once would be pretty difficult even for a short distance, let alone all the way to Canterlot,” Twilight said.

“Oh! Oh!” Gadget cried, waving a mechanical hand wildly. “I know! We could use those transmission towers, like the TechQuestrians did with their ship! That way we could--”

Twilight shook her head at that as well. “Too risky. My guess is that the TechQuestrians already had their course laid in and calculated. While I might be able to teleport us, getting it perfect from one tower to the next would be next to impossible.”

“Well, we could always take the train back,” Fluttershy suggested.

“By the time you got there at that rate,” Umahara said, “the conflict would already be over.”

“Also, I’m pretty sure we already arrested your train conductor on some fake charge,” Violet Wisp said, blushing as she rubbed the back of her neck.

“Um,” Spike began, “my dragonfire magic might be back. I could send a message to Celestia, if you think it would help? We might be able to think of something if we can communicate with each other!”

“It’s a good idea, Spike, but unless it’s been 24 hours, your magic isn’t back yet,” Umahara said, shaking his head. “If you ask me, we should get out of Mustangia and try to find somewhere safe to regroup. Maybe the Crystal Empire…”

“Come on, everypony, don’t give up yet!” Pinkie exclaimed. “Maybe we just need to think outside the box! Ooh, I’ll bet 001 has an awesome, unique idea that none of us would have thought of in a million years!”

They all turned to 001, who looked back and forth at them, seeing she was at the center of attention. She sat down, tapping herself on the side of the head as she thought long and hard about the answer. At last, she rose to her hooves again, raising her head excitedly as she blurted out her answer:

“Bicycles!!”

They all stared back at her.

“Okay, mayyyybe not,” Pinkie said, chuckling nervously. She patted 001 on the head. “But, um… good try anyway, 001.”

001 crossed her forelegs, turning her head to the side indignantly. “Me ahead of me time.”

“Now hold on,” Rarity said, rubbing her chin. “Maybe Gadget was onto something with that teleportation idea. If Twilight can’t calculate the correct path, then perhaps we simply need somepony who can! And it just so happens that we have such a pony here: Turing Test!”

They all looked to Turing.

“That may be possible,” she said. “Teleportation is a skill I have yet to master. With more information, however, I suppose it would be possible to make such a jump utilizing the transmission towers--”

“Wait a minute,” Umahara said, his eyes widening. “Oh no.. oh, that’s right, you all don’t know about… oh, I’m an idiot!” he shouted, smacking himself in the forehead.

“What is it, Umahara?” Twilight asked.

“I forgot that the New Dawn is projecting a massive magical shield around Canterlot. It’s similar to the one your brother was projecting around the city prior to his wedding and the changeling invasion, but this one is backed by a huge amount of power. It’s totally impenetrable, so whether we go by train or teleportation--”

“Bicycles!”

“--yes, or bicycles,” he said, shooting 001 a sour look, “the point is that we couldn’t possibly get in. It would repel any physical or magical force attempting to get inside. By isolating Canterlot, they’ve cut it off from any reinforcements and prevented Celestia and Luna from escaping. Trust me… Canterlot is lost.”

Twilight shook her head. “No!” she shouted. “I won’t accept that!”

“We could always use the power of the Elements,” Fluttershy said. “That ‘Rainbow Power’ was powerful enough to stop almost anything, even Tirek when we used it.”

Rainbow Dash grinned. “‘Rainbow Power,’” she said, repeating the phrase. “I always did like that name.”

“Hey, that might work!” Spike exclaimed. “Twilight, do you think you and the others can pull it off?”

Twilight pursed her lips. “Maybe… I think whatever they hit us with just temporarily disabled our power, instead of stripping it away.”

“You’re forgetting that they can detect it!” Umahara shouted. “As soon as they detect you, they’ll counter it! That’s the whole reason they built the Harmonic Drive! I’m telling you, there’s no way through that barrier!” He heaved a sigh, bowing his head. “We… we lost.”

Twilight gawked at him, her jaw dropping and her ears folding back as she sank to the ground. “Then… there’s nothing we can do? Nothing at all?”

Turing Test stood by the whole time, taking all of this in.

Assessing situation: the barrier around Canterlot is impenetrable through normal means, and reaching Canterlot with expedience is impractical. A solution must be found which allows us to travel to Canterlot and penetrate the barrier without being detected by the TechQuestrian forces. Scanning data for solutions… 1 match found.

“I may have an idea,” Turing said, drawing their attention. “However, it is contingent on one thing.”

Twilight stood. “And that is?” she asked breathlessly.

Turing turned to Umahara. “Umahara, do you know the location of the device TechQuestria used to manipulate the sun and moon?”

“The Sun Sphere?” he asked, raising an eyebrow. “Sure, I was there for the test. But how does that help us?”

“I recall what Twilight Sparkle told me about that night…”

She explained her plan. As she did so, their eyes lit up. When she was finished, Twilight cheered, embracing her.

“That’s perfect, Turing!” Twilight exclaimed. “In that case, there’s no time to waste! Umahara, lead the way!”

“I think we can go through the docking bay,” Umahara said, pointing at the opening in the earth from which the New Dawn had launched. “We’ll follow a tunnel to the secret observatory where the Sun Sphere’s located, but that means going back through TechQuestria. We’re bound to run into more security forces to fight off.”

They looked at the defeated forces laid out around them.

Sea Hawk smirked. “Something tells me they won’t be a problem,” he said.

***

The massive screens on either side of the New Dawn lit up again, and the ponies of Canterlot once more looked to the sky.

“Hello again, everypony!” Sprocket Rocket exclaimed, smiling warmly at the audience. “It’s time for Part 2 of ‘What We Stand For.’ In Part 1, we talked about technology, how it enriches our lives, and how life could be better if the country embraced it more!

“But now, we’ll talk about something just as important…”

The screen changed and showed a title card, displaying one word in all capital letters as the music played a triumphant fanfare:

“DEMOCRACY!”

The image changed to an animation of several ponies sitting in a classroom.

“Do you remember voting for your class president in school?” Sprocket asked as the cartoon fillies and colts slipped pieces of paper into a box on the teacher’s desk. “We bet you do! Or how about voting for school board president? Or even voting for your favorite restaurant or boutique in Canterlot Magazine?” The images showed each of these things animated in sequence. “You want to make the best choice, of course. It isn’t always perfect, but everypony should get a say, don’t you think? Well, that’s an example of democracy!”

The image changed again to show live action of ponies lining up in front of outdoor voting booths next to a small town city hall.

“Did you know that almost every city, town, and village votes for a mayor? It’s true! Canterlot doesn’t have a mayor, but you did vote for your own representative at the National Conference. Again, isn’t it fair when everypony gets a say? Isn’t your opinion worth something? Don’t you want somepony you trust making the tough decisions?”

The image showed the schoolponies all raising their hooves. It then transitioned to live-action footage of a large group of proud, smiling ponies all raising their hooves as well.

“So, with all that, don’t you have to ask yourself… why is our country’s leader a princess that nopony voted for?” Sprocket asked.

The image changed to footage of Celestia riding in her royal chariot down the streets of Canterlot, ponies bowing to her as she went by.

“Many of you probably never even thought about it,” Sprocket continued. “Princess Celestia has just always been there. Why would it be any other way? But think about all some of the things we talked about in Part 1… a hundred years of mistrust in technology like automata and telephones… all the wonderful things Equestria could have had… is it really fair that just one pony made that decision for all of us?”

The footage of Celestia froze as she seemed to glance over at the camera, a large question mark appearing over her face as a haunting tone sounded.

“What about the other things that have happened to Equestria recently under her watch? Nightmare Moon? Discord? Tirek?” The image showed pictures of each of these villains in turn. “What about the invasion of Canterlot itself by Queen Chrysalis and the changeling horde? How many of you were there for that…?”

As footage played of the changelings overrunning Canterlot from the invasion last year, of the strange insectoid creatures snatching up loved ones and cocooning them in gelatinous cells, many of the ponies began to shudder. Some looked away, the horrible memories fresh in their minds.

“Even now, the Royal Guard and the Night Guard have been overwhelmed by our forces. Even with inferior numbers, our technology has allowed us to quickly overwhelm them and lock down Canterlot. Now, don’t worry, we don’t plan to hurt anypony… but what if we weren’t so benevolent? Wouldn’t it be terrible that Canterlot was left so vulnerable? Shouldn’t the leader whose complacency left it so behind the times be held accountable? We sure think so…”

The image showed Rocket Sprocket looking at the screen, his face kind, but sad. “A few minutes ago, we issued our terms to Princess Celestia. We’re calling for her and Princess Luna to step down peacefully and to establish a national representative democracy. Now, don’t worry, we’re not out to hurt the princesses; we just want to put the power to choose back in your hooves. Yes, you,” he said, pointing directly at the viewer. “You have a voice in the new Equestria.

“Thank you for your attention, and bless the nation of Equestria!”

The film ended again. The streets erupted as ponies began shouting about what they’d just seen. Some denounced the traitors who dared question Her Majesty.

But a growing number of voices did just that. They asked how anypony could just ignore what they’d heard. And they grew louder…

***

A pair of doors stood before them. A trail of beaten guards behind lay behind them.

“It’s in here?” Sea Hawk asked.

“This is it,” Umahara said, nodding.

“I’ll go first, just in case there are more guards inside, Your Highness,” Sea Hawk said, glancing back at Twilight.

“All right, but please be careful,” Twilight said.

Sea Hawk tried the doors, but they wouldn’t budge. Voices were heard from inside.

“Sounds like they’re waiting for us,” Sea Hawk surmised, narrowing his eyes. “All right, guards, we’ll have to break the door down. We’ll take the point so Princess Twilight can--”

“Pardon me,” Turing said as she walked by him, “but I believe there is a simpler solution.”

“And that is?” Sea Hawk asked.

She lowered her head. “Activating E-Mode.”

As her leg pistons engaged, she dashed forward, crashing through the doors and the items barricading them, smashing them all to bits.

“Breach!” shouted one of the security guards inside. The guards blindly drew their shock batons and fired bolts of electricity on their target.

Of course, Turing Test simply stood there, totally immune to the electrical shock. A moment later, she was darting around the room, quickly landing disabling blows on each of the guards. In less than ten seconds, every guard in the room was unconscious.

“The area is secure, my friends,” she said, standing before them.

“Great work, Turing!” Twilight said, the others similarly voicing their agreement.

“Ha!” Orange Slice laughed. “Sarge is right, robot… you’d make a great soldier. Too bad you’re not interested.”

“Hm, maybe we could recruit her sister,” Violet Wisp suggested.

The two pegasi looked to 001, who met their gaze.

“Roger Wilco!” she exclaimed, saluting so hard she hit herself in the head, producing a loud clang as she did so. “Bravo Zulu! Hakuna Matata!”

“Aww, she sounds like you when you joined, Orange Slice!” Violet Wisp said, elbowing him in the ribs.

While Orange Slice grumbled, the two of them walked into the room now that Turing Test had cleared the way.

They all fell silent for a moment before Twilight broke the silence with a breathless “Wow…”

The room was a dome-shaped area. A slit in the roof and the various star charts and maps of the sky surrounding them made it seem like an observatory. But in the center was a device that truly caught their attention.

The machine was in the shape of a giant telescope, with its long, cylindrical scope that stretched upwards at a diagonal angle. However, at the upper end, the scope terminated not in a lens, but a massive sphere etched with astronomical symbols. Most striking was that the machine was covered in gold plating, and the lights around it had been strategically placed to shine upward, making it appear to glow in the otherwise dimly-lit room.

“So that’s the thing that you guys used to move the sun and moon that one time?” Rainbow Dash asked, glancing over at Umahara.

“That’s right,” he said, and he was unable to keep himself from swelling with pride. “We had a fancy name for it throughout development, but nowadays we just call it ‘The Sun Sphere.’”

“Well, I hate to admit it,” Rarity said, brushing her mane back, “but for such an insidious device, it really is quite stunning.”

“It’s not insidious,” Umahara snapped. “If something ever happens to Celestia and Luna, you’ll be glad we can still move the sun and moon without putting other ponies at risk!”

“Oh yeah, right!” Rainbow Dash scoffed. “I’m so sure you ponies made this thing just to be safe and not, you know, so you could take down the princesses guilt free!”

“That’s enough, all of you,” Twilight said. “We can’t afford to waste time bickering. Umahara, can you activate it?”

He nodded. “Yes, but I’ll need a hand.”

Gadget slid up next to him, wiggling her mechanical fingers. “How about four?”

He sighed, shaking his head, but couldn’t help but smile. “Okay, come with me,” he said. “You know, one day you’ll get sick of jokes like that.”

“Pfft! Not likely!” she laughed.

Twilight turned to Spike. “Spike, you help too, please.”

“I’m on it!” he said, rushing after them.

She then turned to Sea Hawk. “Sergeant, please stand watch and let us know if you see any more guards coming.”

“Yes, Your Highness!” Sea Hawk said, bowing to her. “You heard her, guards. Take up positions at the entrance.”

“And what about us, Twilight?” Pinkie asked.

“Right now, I’d say to just try to relax,” Twilight said, letting out a sigh as she sat down. “After today, I feel like I’ve just run a marathon.”

“Oh thank goodness!” Rarity moaned, sitting down on the floor. Then she immediately got back up, shivering. “Ugh! This floor is freezing, and it’s simply filthy! I’ll see if one of these chairs is a bit more comfortable.”

“Heh,” Rainbow Dash chuckled as she watched her go. She stretched out on the concrete floor. “Not me! I’m gonna catch some shuteye while Umahara and Gadget get this thing working.”

Applejack nodded, likewise finding a nice spot. “Sounds good to me,” she said. “Come on over here, 001, an’--”

“Me help nerdy ponies!” 001 shouted, bounding over to one of the nearby consoles as she began pounding on the buttons randomly.

“Whoa, whoa, you come back here!” Applejack shouted, running after her.

As the others all either settled in to relax, helped Gadget and Umahara, or just took a look around the room, Twilight found herself almost nodding off as she sat by herself.

But then she heard the sound of metal hooves scraping on the concrete and a soft clang as Turing sat down next to her.

“Am I disturbing you, Twilight Sparkle?” she asked.

Twilight rubbed her eyes, yawning. “No, not really,” she said. “I’m tired, but I don’t think I could sleep with all that’s going on anyway.” She smiled at her robotic friend. “What’s on your mind?”

Turing tapped her chin, producing the familiar metallic rhythm. “In truth, many things are occupying my thoughts,” she replied.

Twilight gave Turing her full attention. “Such as…?”

“Firstly, I am concerned about what to do should our plan be unsuccessful,” she said.

“If it is, we’ll think of something else,” Twilight replied.

“Perhaps so,” Turing said. “But I have already considered all other possibilities, and no other method could produce similarly ideal results.”

“You can’t always get an ideal result,” Twilight said soberly. “But no matter what, we’ll keep doing what we have to.”

“Of that, I have no doubt,” Turing said, nodding. She was quiet for another moment, but then asked, “Twilight Sparkle, what are the Elements of Harmony?”

Twilight raised an eyebrow at that. “I’m pretty sure I’ve told you about them in all the time we’ve spent together,” she said.

“I am aware that the Elements were once gemstone-like artifacts that had originally been gathered from the Tree of Harmony,” Turing said, “and that you eventually had to return them to save the Tree after it had lost too much power to repel magically-enhanced vines, and that you were eventually granted the power of the Elements including the Map which allows you and your friends to locate ‘friendship problems,’ as you call them.”

Twilight’s eyebrow did not lower. “Yes, that’s all true,” she said. “So what’s the point?”

“Is it not clear? I apologize,” she said. “But, again, I know only what the Elements do, not what they are.”

“Ahh, now I see,” Twilight said, nodding her head. “Well, the truth is, Turing, that I’m not really certain myself. You’re right that they look like gemstones, and I tried my best to analyze them when I still had them, but I never figured out exactly what they were. And the same goes for the Tree of Harmony. I have no idea what to classify it as, since it’s not like any other tree in any known book. I’m not even totally sure it’s actually a tree!”

“I see,” Turing said, lowering her head. “How very puzzling.”

Twilight frowned. “What do you mean?”

Turing met her gaze. “When you and your friends utilized the power of the Elements, I detected a strange signal. My auditory systems registered something almost like a voice… and yet I find that I am unable to recreate the sound and I have no matching data to identify it. Furthermore, I detected something similar when the TechQuestrians used their weapon, the Harmonic Drive. However, the signal was less clear, as though something else was interfering with it.”

Twilight said nothing, but rubbed her chin. “I… I’ve never heard of that before,” she said. “In fact, I don’t think I’ve ever heard a ‘voice’ when we’ve used the Elements. I don’t know how to explain it…” Then she brightened. “But it sounds like a great research project!”

Turing nodded, looking away for a moment at Umahara and Gadget making the final adjustments to the Sun Sphere. Then she spoke again, abruptly:

“Twilight Sparkle?” she asked quietly.

“Yes, Turing?”

The robot moved closer, leaning against Twilight, laying her head on her shoulder. “I’m afraid,” she whispered. “I am so afraid of what may happen to us. To you. To me. To my friends here and across Equestria…”

Twilight put her forelegs around her and held her. “Shhh,” she said, patting her on the head like a mother comforting a filly. “I know you are, Turing. We all are, but we have to be brave.”

“But how can I simply stop my emotion?” she asked. “How can organic ponies choose not to feel something?”

“Being brave doesn’t mean not feeling fear,” Twilight answered. “It means going forward even though you’re afraid. Do you understand?”

Turing was still at first, but then nodded. She embraced Twilight in return. “Understood, Twilight Sparkle,” she said softly. “I will be brave. But it will not be easy.”

“No,” Twilight said, patting her gently. “Being brave is never easy.”

“Okay, I think we’ve got it!” Umahara shouted, pulling one last switch on the Sun Sphere’s controls.

The slit in the dome above them slid open, and the dome itself began to turn as well with a metallic groan. Eventually it lined up with the morning sun, and the Sun Sphere rotated and locked onto it as well.

“How much do you think we should move the sun?” Gadget asked.

“Ooh, we should make it bounce in time with some music!” Pinkie exclaimed. “It’ll be the ultimate light show!”

“Pinkie, no,” Twilight said sternly. To Umahara and Gadget, she said, “Just turn it on and give it the smallest nudge you can. I don’t want anypony to notice, if possible.”

Umahara nodded, entering the minor change in coordinates into the main console at the base of the Sun Sphere. “Okay then, here we go!”

The Sun Sphere made a low, reverberating noise that echoed throughout the chamber. The sound brought the guards back into the room.

Rainbow Dash took to the air, shielding her eyes to avoid looking directly at the sun. But just the same, she noted how the sun seemed to momentarily jerk upward a tiny bit.

***

In Canterlot, Celestia was with Luna, conferring with her military advisers, when she felt a shiver and gasped, raising her head.

“Your Majesty!” the captain cried.

“Sister!” Luna exclaimed. “Are you all right?”

“I…” she began, glancing out the nearest window. “Yes, it’s just that… the sun is…”

Then she paused. Her look of confusion was suddenly replaced with a smile as what had happened dawned on her. She put a hoof over her mouth as she chuckled.

“Celestia?” Luna asked, raising an eyebrow. “Are you all right?”

“Yes,” she said. “I’m not certain, but I think Twilight Sparkle is still out there, and I think she and her friends have a plan.”

***

“Aaaand, movement complete!” Umahara exclaimed.

The others all cheered.

Then there was utter silence.

“Um,” Fluttershy began, raising a hoof tentatively, “did it not work? Maybe he--”

There was a bright flash of light, and a new figure stood in their midst.

“I have you now, evil-doers!” the creature shouted, rising up tall above them as he held a clawed hand up dramatically. “For now you face the wrath of--”

“Discord!!” they all shouted, cheering. Fluttershy threw her forelegs around him, embracing him.

“Fluttershy?” Discord asked, blinking as he looked around at all of them. “Hm? Well, I certainly didn’t expect to see all of you here,” he said, slumping and giving a pout. “Not that I’m disappointed… I just expected a room full of mad scientist evil-doers, is all. I even put on this costume just for the occasion!”

They noticed that he was wearing a blue suit with a yellow and red emblem on his chest. He also had a cape and a pair of underwear that he was wearing over his pants.

“Well, you can still help us,” Twilight said. “We need--”

“Hold that thought,” Discord said, putting a finger to her lips as he noticed the Sun Sphere. “Is this the gizmo that made the sun twitch just now?” He teleported onto the sphere, reclining upon it casually. “Not bad for a pseudo-doomsday device, all things considered. Very flashy.”

“It’s called the Sun Sphere,” Umahara said. “It’s what we used to manipulate the sun’s movement--”

Discord suddenly teleported back down and got right in Umahara’s face, his red eyes glowing like hot coals. “We?” he asked. “So you’re the mad scientist I’m looking for?”

“Hey, he’s not with them anymore!” Gadget exclaimed, going to his side.

“What the… are you some kind of octopus-pony hybrid?!” he gasped. “If so, you’re not committing to the look…”

He snapped his fingers, and Gadget’s mechanical arms were replaced with four slimy purple tentacles.

They all gawked at her as she froze, her expression a mixture of surprise and utter revulsion.

“Look, Gadget,” Turing said, “it seems you’ve become like one of the characters in your Neighponese com--”

“Stop talking!” Gadget shrieked, her face turning bright red as her tentacles flailed about.

Spike and Umahara started snickering before Gadget seized them both around the necks, lifting them up. “You two shut up! And you,” she shouted, looking up at Discord, “change these back!”

“Oh, but it’s such an improvement--”

“Discord,” Fluttershy said, giving him a disapproving look.

“Oh, fine,” he said, snapping his fingers as Gadget’s limbs returned to normal. “But anyway, what are you all doing here?”

“Ugh,” Twilight groaned. “Look, Discord, we came here to help Turing Test after she was kidnapped--”

“Kidnapped?!” he exclaimed. He swiftly went over to Turing, picking her up and raising his fist heroically. “Never fear, my robotic friend! I, Discord, the Master of Chaos, shall save you!”

“I am glad to see you as well, Discord,” Turing said. “But I have already been rescued.”

“Oh,” he said, looking crestfallen again as he set her down. “Well, if you’ve got this all taken care of, then what am I even doing here?!”

“Allow me to explain,” Turing replied. “I recalled that you promised Twilight Sparkle and the other Princesses that you would locate the device upon its next use. We therefore used it to summon you, as we knew you would feel the magical disturbance.”

“I gathered that,” he said, rolling his eyes. “But still, why call me?”

“That’s what I’ve been trying to tell you!” Twilight shouted, flying up and getting in his face. “Discord, the ponies who built Turing Test are planning to take over Equestria! They’ve already left on a giant airship and have encased Canterlot in an impenetrable magic bubble!”

“‘Impenetrable,’ you say?” he asked, chuckling to himself. “Oh nonsense! With my magic, I could easily teleport you inside!”

“Yes,” Twilight said through gritted teeth. “That’s what--”

“Oh, what a wonderful idea, Discord!” Fluttershy cried. She looked to Twilight and winked. The message was clear: Just go with it, Twilight.

“Well then, let’s see,” he said, snapping his fingers and producing a stewardess uniform on his body. “Passengers include Fluttershy and her usual entourage of five, DJ Spikey-D, the mad scientist and the arachnid girl, a gaggle of guards, Turing Test, and then Turing Test again.”

He paused. “Wait, since when are there two of you, Turing Test?” he asked, pointing his lion paw finger at 001.

“This is my elder sister, Unit 001, Discord,” Turing replied.

“I didn’t know a robot could have a sister,” Discord said, rubbing his chin as he considered 001.

“You funny noodle,” 001 said, pointing up at him. “Funny noodle make Gazzet arms wiggly!”

Discord grinned, softening his expression in an instant while Gadget smoldered behind him. “Oh, but I think I like her!” he exclaimed. “Do you have any other family?”

“Affirmative,” Turing replied. “I have another sister named 002, but--”

Discord snapped his fingers, and 002 suddenly appeared before him.

“Oh,” Turing said nonchalantly as most of the others nearby bristled. “Hello again, Sister.”

“What? 003, is this your doing?” she asked, looking around.

“I apologize, Sister,” Turing said, “but I did not ask Discord to bring you here.”

Then she looked up and noticed Discord. “Oh… you. I’ve heard of you.”

“Ah, my reputation precedes me!” Discord exclaimed, putting a claw to his chest. He then snatched up 002, holding her with outstretched arms like a pet puppy. “I think we’re going to be good friends too!”

002 stared at him silently with her singular eye. “I didn’t think there was anything more disgusting than organics,” she hissed, “until I met you, a creature made up of several organics at once. The only activity I could imagine enjoying with you is your vivisection.”

Discord frowned. “My my… quite the little edgelord, aren’t we?”

“Send me back, or I will murder you in your sleep, you genetic jigsaw puzzle.”

“Oookayy, well, that’s enough of that!” Discord said quickly, snapping his fingers and sending 002 back where she came from. “For an even number, she’s certainly odd. Any other siblings, Turing Test?”

“Affirmative. I also have--”

“No!” Twilight shouted. “We don’t have time for this! Discord, please, we need to go to Canterlot!”

Discord rolled his eyes. “Oh please,” he scoffed, “what possible threat could a bunch of science-project winners pose?”

He snapped his fingers, and they all vanished in a flash of light.

***

Celestia and Luna had gone back to the ballroom to check on the delegates. Celestia was about to address them and ask for their input when there was a flash and the whole group from Mustangia suddenly appeared in front of her.

Unfortunately for them, Discord had mostly dumped them all together in a pile.

“Ugh,” Twilight groaned, hearing similar sounds of discomfort from her friends. “Please after all that, tell me we’re actually in Canterlot?”

“Twilight?!” Celestia gasped.

Twilight looked up and saw Celestia and Luna looking down at her.

“Celestia!” Twilight cried, going to her side. “Oh thank goodness! I was afraid something might have happened to you!”

“And I was worried for you too,” Celestia said, a beaming smile on her face. “And I see you brought your friends with you… including Turing Test!”

Turing stood and went to her, bowing before her. “I am glad to see you as well, Princess Celestia.”

Celestia breathed a sigh of relief. “And it seems that your memory is intact after all,” she said.

“That’s wonderful news,” Luna said, joining at Celestia’s side. “When we heard of your abduction, we feared the worst.”

“My memory was indeed removed,” Turing said, “but it was restored. Furthermore, I would like you both to meet my elder sister, 001.”

“Ah, a sister!” Luna exclaimed. “How wonderful! Where is she?”

Turing Test looked over her shoulder, but didn’t see 001 at first. “001? Are you present?”

001 burst from under the pile of the others, sending them flying before they could disentangle themselves. She bound over to stand next to Turing.

“001, these ponies are Princess Celestia and Princess Luna,” she said. “They are my friends and two of the rulers of Equestria.”

001 nodded. “Hi, Noona! Hi, Cholesterol! You really big!”

The two royal sisters’ smiles became forced.

“Ha ha!” Twilight laughed, putting herself between the pair of sisters. “Okay, well, now that introductions are over…”

Celestia nodded, turning serious. “Of course,” she said. “Twilight Sparkle, the situation is grave. The forces of TechQuestria have defeated almost every guard station, leaving only the castle. They’re broadcasting propaganda and they’ve demanded--”

“--That Equestria be turned into a democracy, I know,” Twilight said. “He tried to recruit me, too. But I refused.”

Luna raised her head, nodding approvingly. “I knew we could count on you and the others to be loyal,” she said. “And now that you are here, you can assist us in dealing with--”

“A-hem!” Discord snapped, teleporting himself into view. “Did somepony forget about yours truly? Why, with me around, who even needs guards or Elements? I’m the ultimate Deus Ex Machina!”

“Me never ask for this,” 001 said gravely.

“That’s… anyway,” Discord said, ignoring her, “where’s this airship that’s been giving you so much trouble?”

He looked around and then glanced out the window, finally spotting the New Dawn.

“That’s it?” he asked. “Sure it’s big, but it’s hardly an enterprise worth worrying about. I’ll go handle it.”

He raised his fingers.

“Discord, no!” Twilight shouted. “They’ve got--”

Discord snapped his fingers, vanishing again in a flash of light.

***

Cobbler sat in the captain’s chair when his top hat began to move atop his head.

“What in the world?” he asked, removing the hat.

Discord’s head popped out of the hat. “Guess who!” he shouted.

Cobbler dropped the hat, and all the crew members on the bridge of the New Dawn turned and gawked at the draconequus as he extracted himself from the piece of headwear.

“So, this is your big secret weapon?” Discord asked, raising an eyebrow. “I’m not impressed.”

“Intruder on the bridge!” the chief of security shouted into his microphone. “Security!”

“Say, what’s the name of this ship anyway?” Discord asked.

“For your information, it’s the New Dawn,” Hiker said, thrusting his chin out.

Discord made a face. “I’ve got a better name for it. How about… the Bismark!”

He snapped his fingers.

***

In the streets of Canterlot, the citizens all looked up and saw as the gigantic airship suddenly turned into a long jelly donut kept aloft with giant party balloons tied to it with string.

***

“Much improved!” Discord laughed.

“Sir!” the communications officer cried. “We’re getting reports that the lower decks are filled with jam!”

“Well, so ends this plan of conquest,” Discord said, polishing his claws on his chest. “A bit of an anticlimax, really. Well, at least I can sing a victory song!”

He teleported again and appeared on the (now much doughier) top deck of the ship. He was wearing a wig with curly black hair, a black faux-leather jacket, pantyhose, and high boots. As music began to play, he was surrounded by clones of himself wearing sailors’ uniforms.

“Ohhh, if I could turn back time…” he began to sing. The projector screens on the side of the ship broadcast the performance to the weirded-out ponies below.

While this went on, Cobbler, eye twitching, leaned over to Hiker. “Commander, is the Harmonic Drive still operational?” he asked in a whisper.

Hiker looked to the chief of security, who nodded.

“Somehow, sir,” he said.

“Good,” Cobbler said, standing by the pedestal. “On my mark…”

***

Twiight and the others all watched Discord’s bizarre performance when he paused, the music skipping. He took on a sudden expression of horror right before a massive burst of rainbow color blasted outward from the control tower of the New Dawn, overtaking him. For a moment, they saw him there, his expression frozen, locked in stone. Then the image terminated and the New Dawn returned to its normal form.

“Discord!” Fluttershy screamed.

A moment later, the messenger drone in the ballroom’s speaker came to life.

“Very funny, Celestia,” Cobbler snarled. “But not good enough. As you can see, we came prepared for everything… even the most chaotic being in Equestria. While I thank you very much for the new statue, I must ask you to not try something like that again.

He paused, sounding like he was trying to catch his breath. “You have ninety minutes left to make your decision. I strongly suggest you make the correct one.”

The communication ended. The delegates watching all this stood in stunned silence. Celestia bowed her head. The only sound was of Fluttershy sobbing and some of the others comforting her.

Turing Test looked to Twilight. In that instant, Turing knew that Twilight had been right… being brave was not easy.

To be continued…

Author's Notes:

Now that everypony is in Canterlot, the stage is set for the final act...

In the meantime... (1950s movie reel voice) Why, hello there, Billy! Say, sport are you enjoying that copy of the Iron Horse? (Billy nods and smiles.) You are? Why, that's swell! But did you ever stop to think about all those jokes that sound like they came from another book or movie or something? (Billy does this: 🤔) Well then, Billy, it's time you learned about References! (title card: "References and You - Defending Your Fanfics from Communism")
Er... anyway, references!

First of all, we have the title, which references the song "Lionhearted" by Porter Robinson (ft. Urban Cone). And luckily enough, there's a Pony Music Video version. A listen to the lyrics might tell you a bit about the theme of this sub-arc:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bJMwghjNEgo
001 shouts the phrases "Roger Wilco," "Bravo Zulu," and "Hakuna Matata," which are, in order, "received and will comply" in radiotelephone speak, "well done" in Naval signals, and the phrase meaning "no worries" in Swahili (made famous by Disney's The Lion King)
Discord, in the first of many reference jokes, shows up in "a blue suit with a yellow and red emblem on his chest... a cape and a pair of underwear that he was wearing over his pants," which of course references Superman, but this isn't the first time he's worn such attire.
Discord refers to himself as the ultimate "Deus Ex Machina," to which 001 replies, "Me never ask for this." This is a reference to the video game Deus Ex: Human Revolution, and the protagonist, Adam Jensen, who responds to a question about his cybernetic augmentation with "I never asked for this." It became a minor meme in 2011 when people would respond with the phrase to unwanted content. More info here, if you want it.
Discord says the New Dawn is "big, but it’s hardly an enterprise worth worrying about." Of course this references Discord's voice actor, Jon De Lancie's role as Q on Star Trek: The Next Generation, where he would pop in periodically to plague the crew of, of course, the starship Enterprise.
Discord turns the New Dawn into a jelly donut after saying the ship should be named The Bismark. This is a double-edged play on words, as it references the German World War II battleship Bismarck, sunk in 1941,
and the name for jelly donuts in some parts of Canada and the US: bismarks. Both are named after Otto von Bismarck.
Lastly, the song and outfit Discord wears while prematurely celebrating on the New Dawn is a reference to the (in)famous music video by Cher, "Turn Back Time," which takes place, appropriately, on the deck of a battleship
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BsKbwR7WXN4

That's it for now. See you next time! 🎩

The Lionhearted, Part 2

View Online

Cobbler slammed the radio down on its holder as he let out a final snarl. He felt lightheaded and his legs buckled, so leaned against the console to steady himself.

“Mr. President!” Commander Hiker shouted, going to his side. “Are you all right?!”

“I’m fine!” he shouted, pushing Hiker away roughly as he forced himself to stand. He took a breath, and in a calmer tone, repeated, “I’m fine, Mr. Hiker. Just a little woozy.”

Hiker looked around. Cobbler wasn’t the only one on the bridge who looked ‘woozy.’ Several members of the crew were in a cold sweat. A few were gasping for air. Still others were massaging their temples in pain.

Even he had to admit that he felt nauseous. There was a strange taste in his mouth, too, and a strange feeling he couldn’t shake…

“No… no!”

All eyes turned toward the helmsmare. She was shaking her head and sobbing uncontrollably.

“Helm!” Hiker cried, going over to her side. “Are you all right?”

“I… I don’t know,” she managed to say. “I just f-felt this… this awful feeling like… like something horrible was about to happen… I…”

“Sir, I recommend the helmsmare report to sickbay immediately,” he said, turning to Cobbler.

To his surprise, Cobbler had returned to the captain’s chair and had leaned back in it. He was taking deep breaths, not paying any attention to him.

“Sir!” Hiker shouted.

Cobbler sat bolt upright. “What?” he asked, looking around. His eyes looked glassy and unfocused for a moment, until he locked his eyes on Hiker as he helped the helmsmare to her hooves. “Ah… yes, of course. Call for the relief helmspony.”

“Aye, sir!” the communications officer said, picking up the radio transmitter. “Sickbay, the helmsmare is on her way. She’s reporting strange feelings--”

“Well, she’s not the only one!” the ship’s doctor barked back. “I’ve got ponies all over the ship reporting in with all kinds of symptoms. Some have vertigo, some are hallucinating and hearing voices, and a few of them have splitting headaches.”

Hiker frowned and went over to the communications officer, taking the radio from her. “Doctor, did all this start right after we used the Harmonic Drive?”

“Seems that way,” he replied.

“I see,” Hiker said grimly. “Well, keep treating the crew. We’ll keep you posted.”

He gave the radio back to the communications officer so she could call for the replacement helmspony. He then looked to the security chief, who seemed to be staring out into space.

“Chief, are you all right?” he asked.

“Huh? Oh… oh, I…” He shook his head. “Yes, sir, I… sir! Mr. President!”

Cobbler came over to him alongside Hiker. “Yes, Chief, what is it?” Cobbler asked.

“Sir, these readings on the Harmonic Drive don’t look good!” he said, pointing at a dial on the console. “I’m reading a 20% impurity rate, and it’s climbing!”

“What?!” Cobbler shouted. “That’s impossible!”

“I… I don’t think the instruments are malfunctioning, sir.”

“Well, call Engineering and have them perform a maintenance check!” Cobbler bellowed.

Hiker frowned. He went over to the column which contained the controls for the Harmonic Drive. The thaumatrium vials inside it were still there, still glowing. But now there were strange swirls of discoloration, and they looked like they were glowing brighter than before. That strange feeling was coming back.

“Sir,” Hiker said, turning to look at Cobbler, who was still hunched over the chief of security’s controls, “I think we should take the Harmonic Drive offline.”

Cobbler whirled around. “Out of the question!” he shouted.

“Mr. President,” he said, planting his hooves, “we experienced minor physical problems when we used the Harmonic Drive on the Elements. We received even worse effects after we used it on Discord. And those readings? I believe further use of the device would be unsafe!”

Cobbler’s eye twitched, and he slowly approached Hiker, baring his teeth like a wild animal. “You want us to just turn off our greatest weapon?” he asked through his gritted teeth. “Right when we are so close to victory?!”

He is in the way.

Hiker swallowed, but kept his eyes locked on Cobbler. “Sir, please,” he said softly. “For the safety of the crew…”

Cobbler paused a moment, his grimace melting away. “I… well, perhaps…”

No.

Cobbler’s voice caught in his throat. “I…”

Don’t let them. Only one way...

Cobbler shut his eyes, pain momentarily radiating out from his forehead and then across his whole body. He broke out into a cold sweat, but even as he did, that feeling of euphoric intensity again returned. All of a sudden, he felt like he could do anything…

“Sir?” Hiker asked.

Cobbler opened his eyes and smiled at him. “I understand your concern, Mr. Hiker,” he said, “but we’re within acceptable limits. And besides, we will most certainly need this weapon should Celestia have something else in store. But if all goes well, we won’t need it at all.”

“Even so, sir--”

Tell him.

Cobbler locked eyes with Hiker, placing his hoof on the commander’s shoulder. “Everything will be fine,” he said, a strange quality to his voice. “Everything will be fine.”

Hiker relaxed, his limbs feeling strangely numb, and his jaw went slack. All around them, the rest of the crew became similarly numb and docile.

“Understood, sir,” Hiker replied airily. “We will not deactivate the Harmonic Drive. Everything will be fine.”

Cobbler nodded. “Very good,” he said. “Now, have somepony address the public regarding how we defeated Discord. If nothing else, this was a chance to demonstrate just how much power we have. In the meantime, if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to my quarters for a few moments. You have the bridge, Mr. Hiker.”

“Aye...sir,” Hiker replied. He shook his head groggily, stumbling over to the captain’s chair as Cobbler exited through the back, making his way down the hall to his cabin.

With even Discord helpless against us, Cobbler thought, the ponies below will realize our might. And once they realize their opportunity, they will gladly join our cause!

He raised his head, a proud smile on his face.

No.

The smile vanished.

Only one way.

Cobbler’s sight grew dim, and his head felt heavy again all of a sudden. “What… who…”

They will see.

Cobbler raised his head. Swirls of colors swam before his eyes.

Soon… soon...

“Soon.”

***

The citizens of Canterlot had all seen what had happened when Discord momentarily took over the New Dawn, transforming it. But they had also seen the burst of rainbow-colored energy and the sight of him turned to stone. Even as some began to realize what had happened, the radio drones crackled and a voice echoed out over the streets:

“Citizens of Canterlot! We apologize for that rude interruption by the repeat offender known as Discord. However, as you can see, even one of the most powerful beings in Equestria is no match for the power of science and technology! Allow us to explain…

“Through our mastery of magic-based technology, we have successfully created a device which can emulate the Elements of Harmony. Yes, the greatest power our world has ever seen is something we have claimed for ourselves. We have no desire to use this weapon to attack, but we will use it at will to defend ourselves.

“In short, combined with our other defenses, we cannot be defeated. Though we have forgiven this assault by Discord, further attacks will force our hooves. We hope you will all understand and accept our offer of liberation so we can end this conflict peacefully.”

The transmission ended. Blustery talk of how any minute now the Princesses, the Guard, and the Elements would take the TechQuestrians down evaporated.

***

Celestia and Luna turned from the windows, having heard the latest broadcast as well. The delegates were squabbling all around them. Twilight stood nearby, Spike and Turing Test next to her, while the others were still comforting Fluttershy.

The worry on each and every face was plain to see.

Celestia took a deep breath and rose into the air. All eyes turned to her.

“Everypony, please,” she said, her voice loud and clear, but still calm. “I know you are all afraid. I realize this is a tense situation, but we still have our duties to perform. I need to consult with my sister, Princess Twilight, and our guests, so I will leave you to continue your deliberations. If you need us, please inform the guard. For now, I ask you to please give this matter your full consideration, and think of what’s best for our beloved nation.”

Hearing the calm in her voice, the delegates all put their fears behind them and bowed to her.

Satisfied, Celestia led Twilight and the others from the ballroom, down the hall to a private chamber in the castle.

“Twilight,” Celestia said, turning to her, “I think we have a lot to discuss. First of all, who are your guests?”

Right on cue, Sergeant Sea Hawk stepped forward, kneeling before Celestia and Luna. His three subordinates lined up behind him and did the same. “We are the Royal Guard regiment from the Mustangia Outpost, Your Majesties,” Sea Hawk said. “I regret that we failed to detect this terrorist state hiding below our hooves. Furthermore, we let ourselves be captured and mind-controlled. Were it not for Princess Twilight and her friends, we would still be serving them. As the commanding office of my regiment, I take full responsibility for our failure.”

Celestia and Luna exchanged a look.

“The Night Guard are my responsibility, sister,” Luna said. “I believe this is your decision.”

“Celestia,” Twilight said, “what happened wasn’t their fault. TechQuestria was way more prepared than we ever expected. As soon as they were broken of their mind control, they did their best to fight alongside us.”

Celestia nodded, and then gave Sea Hawk a warm smile. She put his hoof to his chin. “Rise, Sergeant,” she said, bidding him to stand. “You and your guards have done your duty. And right now, we need all the help we can get. Please take your guards and see the captain. He’ll send you where you’re needed.”

The guards all saluted, raising their heads proudly. “Yes, Your Majesty!” the all said in unison.

Sea Hawk turned to the others, a proud smile on his face. “You heard the Princess,” he said. “Buttercup, Violet Wisp, Orange Slice… let’s do our duty, and be honored to do so.”

“Sir, yes sir!” they all barked back, all mirroring his smile.

Sea Hawk turned to Twilight as he led them out. He bowed his head slightly, and she did the same as he left.

“That just leaves these two,” Celestia said, turning to Gadget and Umahara.

“Well, this is Gadgette Giroux, or just ‘Gadget,’” Twilight said, pointing to the young mare.

“Oh!” Celestia said. “So this is Cornelius Vanderbull’s assistant. He and my sister have both spoken of you. It’s an honor to meet you.”

Gadget’s eyes went wide, and she fell to her knees, bowing so low that she squished her muzzle into the ground.

“Oh n-no!” Gadget said. “The honor is all mine Your Highness! I mean, ‘Your Majesty!’ Wait, which is it…? Ohhhh jeez, I’m sorry, I--”

This was interrupted by Luna bursting out laughing. “There’s no need prostrate yourself so, young Gadget,” Luna said, going over to her. “I assure you, my sister does not bite.”

001 looked to Turing Test. “My sissa bite?” she asked.

Turing shook her head. “No, 001,” she replied. “Unlike you, I do not possess a mouth.”

001 raised her head. “Me bite,” she whispered proudly.

Gadget, meanwhile, had risen to her hooves, but was still blushing and flustered as she stood before Celestia.

“I’ve heard a lot about your cleverness and your gift for invention,” Celestia said, peering at her mechanical arms. “It seems I was not misinformed.”

Gadget giggled, shuffling her hooves. “Th-thank you, Your… um, Princess!” she said, settling on the safest term. “Mr. Vanderbull always said nice things about you, too!”

“Well, it will be good to have an expert on technology on hoof,” Celestia said.

“Not just one!” Gadget said, using one of her mechanical hands to grab Umahara by the jacket and yank him over to her. “He’s an inventor too!”

“Oh?” Celestia said, looking to him. “And you are…?”

“My name,” he said, narrowing his eyes, “is Champ Umahara.”

Celestia’s smile faded. “Umahara,” she said, repeating the name. “Are you--”

“I’m Dr. Dosanko Umahara’s son,” he said. “The pony you stripped of his license for helping Professor Mustang. The pony whose career you ruined.”

The room went utterly silent.

“Awk-warrrd,” Rainbow Dash muttered.

“I see,” Celestia said. “Then what are you doing here, Mr. Umahara?” she asked.

“I’m here as a former member of TechQuestria,” he said. “I’m also in favor of a democracy in Equestria, but I realized that their methods were too extreme. I decided to help Gadget and the others, so I guess that means I’m on your side, but I need you to know where I stand.”

Celestia nodded. “Very well,” she said. “I would be glad to discuss what happened to your father at a later time, but for now I’m glad to have you with us.”

“For starters,” Luna said, “can you give us some insight into any weaknesses the New Dawn might possess?”

Umahara rubbed his chin. “Weaknesses?” he said. “Nothing I can think of. The ship was designed to be nearly impossible to bring down.”

“What about the levitation pads on the sides of the ship?” Twilight asked.

“Hey yeah!” Rainbow Dash shouted. “If we took those out, the ship would come crashing down!”

“Um, wouldn’t that mean it would crash on top of Canterlot?” Fluttershy asked.

“I estimate that the damage from such a crash,” Turing Test said, “would result in widespread casualties on both sides. Most likely hundreds would die immediately, if not thousands, as well as a great number of injuries.”

“You could take down just a few of them to force a slow descent,” Umahara said, “but those pads also produce a low-level magical shield around them. They’re not as vulnerable as they look. And that’s assuming you got past the anti-air defenses, like the lightning turrets.”

“We’ve already seen them in action,” Celestia said. “An aerial assault failed completely.”

“Couldn’t y’all just teleport some unicorns up there?” Applejack asked.

“Relatively few guards possess that level of magical ability,” Twilight answered. “And teleporting up that high onto a moving target would be tough even for me!”

“And once they spotted you,” Umahara said, “they have anti-boarding turrets hidden below the surface of the top deck. And they’d summon security crews to deal with you. The ship could conceivably be taken down from the inside, but getting in there would be next to impossible, especially with all the spell cards in their possession.”

“Twilight Sparkle,” Luna said, “could you and your friends not just use the power of the Elements to attack?”

“We tried that once,” Twilight said, “and they can counter it. We’d be stopped before they even tried. And besides… I’m not sure I want to risk them using the Harmonic Drive again.”

“It is pretty powerful,” Gadget said. “I wouldn’t want to get zapped with it either!”

“That’s not what I mean,” Twilight said, shaking her head. “The Elements are not something anypony should toy with. I’ve seen what happens to those who abuse their power before… and it’s not pretty.”

“That might explain what I experienced,” Turing added. “I detected a strange signal, like a voice, when I witnessed Twilight Sparkle and the others use their power. However, I detected a different signal, more dissonant than the first, when the TechQuestrians used their Harmonic Drive. And upon witnessing their second use of the weapon against Discord, I again detected a signal. It has grown in intensity and it now sounds more like a voice.”

“And what does the voice say, Turing Test?” Celestia asked, leaning down to look at her with interest.

Turing shook her head. “It does not say anything,” she replied. “It sounds like somepony screaming.”

They all went silent at that. Twilight swallowed.

“That can’t be good,” she said. “All the more reason to avoid causing them to use the weapon again.”

“You’re forgetting something else,” Umahara said, heaving a sigh. “If you attack, they won’t hesitate to start attacking the castle. They’ve got heavy artillery guns that can shell the castle ramparts, enough guards to teleport in and overrun the guards you’ve got left, and they can use the Harmonic Drive as an offensive weapon. They’ve been using its defensive function so far, but they can fire the energy as a concentrated beam from the front of the ship. Even I don’t know how much destructive power it’ll put out… but no matter what, it sounds like it would be bad for all of us.”

“Then… there isn’t anything we can do?” Gadget asked, hugging herself as she lowered her head.

“I have a suggestion,” Turing Test said, raising her hoof. “Allow me to address my father.”

They all gawked at her.

“Your… father?” Celestia asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Affirmative,” she said. “Professor Cobbler Mustang is responsible for my creation, as well as that of my siblings, such as 001.”

“Not Da,” 001 murmured. “He say Not Da.”

“I am aware that he is unwilling to accept that designation,” Turing said, placing her hoof on 001’s shoulder, “but he is my father nonetheless. Perhaps if I am able to speak with him, I will be able to convince him to cease this attack.”

Celestia sighed. “Turing Test,” she said quietly, “while I am sorry about your difficulties with your family, and while I do understand your desire to connect with him, I do not believe Cobbler Mustang would listen.”

“He spoke of you like nothing more than a common tool!” Luna spat. “That stallion has no appreciation for what you really are.”

“Perhaps, but--”

“There’s one more thing,” Umahara said, cutting her off. “He might not realize that we’re here. He only mentioned Discord and he thought that Celestia sent him. If he doesn’t know Twilight and the others escaped Mustangia, then that’s at least one surprise he won’t be expecting. But if you contact him, Turing Test, he’ll know we’re all here.”

Turing looked to her friends, one after another, but saw them nodding in agreement. Applejack was looking at her sadly, but she kept silent.

“I see,” Turing said, bowing her head, her ears squeaking on their hinges as they drooped.

“I’m sorry, Turing,” Twilight said, going to her. “But Umahara’s right… and for now, we need to think of what else we can do.”

“There is one thing you could do,” Umahara said, “but I doubt you’ll like it.”

Twilight frowned. “We’re not surrendering,” she growled. The others likewise shot him dirty looks.

“Listen, I opposed this attack,” he said, holding up his hooves defensively. “But now that it’s here, you all have the power to make a decision. If you refuse, a war starts. And even with all the damage we did back in TechQuestria, they’re still better armed and prepared to fight. Most of the guards we faced were relatively inexperienced, and they didn’t have spell cards. The forces we’d be facing would be TechQuestria’s best and carrying spell cards that would put them on equal footing with your best unicorn mages. Not only that, but TechQuestria also has the better propaganda, so they could win more and more ponies to their side. Win or lose, this war could drag out and cost a lot of ponies their lives.

“But if you surrender, just give in, you might just avoid a war altogether. Even if you could beat them, and I’m not sure you could, the cost would be much worse than if you just accept defeat.” He looked up at Celestia, locking eyes with her. “Think about the ponies of Equestria… you two would get to continue raising the sun and moon, you’d get to retire from all this work after a thousand years, and you’d even get to live free!”

“In exile,” Luna snarled.

“Yes, in the Crystal Empire!” Umahara groaned. “Don’t act like you’d be marooned on a barren island or sent to Tartarus.”

He felt a tug at his jacket and turned to see Gadget looking up at him. “Maybe you’re right,” she said, “but think about the way they treat ponies under their control now. They treated Spike like an animal… they were going to torture me and steal my invention… they brainwashed the guards… and, to top it all off, they’d treat sentient beings like Turing Test and her kind as slaves!”

“That is also one of my fears,” Turing said. “If they are allowed to thrive with the mindset they currently possess, they will no doubt create other robots like myself. They will not be given a chance to have a life, as I was. They will be forced to act as servants, like my sister, or combatants, like my brother. Generations of machines like myself will suffer. I cannot allow that.”

Umahara swallowed. “Turing, I… I’m sorry, I didn’t think about that.”

Turing shook her head. “It is all right,” she said. “If you and other TechQuestrians we met are sympathetic to me, then perhaps there is still hope. I, at least, am hopeful.”

“But we are still left with the question of what to do,” Celestia said. “And I confess that I am no closer to an answer than I was before.”

“Nor am I,” Luna said. “It seems that no matter what decision we make, we will put somepony at great risk.”

Just then there was a knock at the door to the chamber.

“Enter!” Celestia called.

The door opened, and the captain of the guard entered. Following him were three ponies: Fancy Pants, Mayor Mare, and the Mayor of Manehatten.

“Forgive the intrusion, Your Majesties,” the captain said, saluting them. “But the delegates wished to speak with you.”

“Not at all,” Celestia said. “I hope they have some advice or insight into our situation.”

“Actually,” Mayor Mare said, “we’ve come up with a unique proposal, and we hope you’ll accept it.”

Celestia and Luna exchanged a look.

“And what proposal is that?” Luna asked.

“Well,” Fancy Pants said, “we realized that TechQuestria considers the delegates as a kind of makeshift Parliament. They respect us because we were elected to these positions democratically. Perhaps we should make our decision based on that principle.”

Celestia raised an eyebrow. “I’m… not certain I follow you.”

“He means we wanna take a vote,” the Mayor of Manehatten said. “All the delegates will get together, talk it out, and then we’ll vote on what to do.”

Celestia blinked.

“Er, what we mean,” Mayor Mare said, “is that we’re asking you to let us make the decision. We take a vote and all of us, including you, agree to abide by it.”

Luna bristled, but kept quiet as she looked to her sister. Celestia’s face was calm, stoic, and impossible to read.

“You realize that you must accept the consequences either way?” Celestia asked.

“Yes, Your Majesties,” they all said.

Celestia shut her eyes. “Then I think we should do as you suggest,” she said. She cracked a smile. “Utilizing democracy to address the topic of democracy… it seems appropriate.”

“But Celestia!” Luna cried. “You… you would just give up the decision?”

“Not give it up,” she said, “but entrust it to the ponies who represent all our subjects. Even if it means that we must give up our thrones.”

Luna stammered for a moment more, but then sighed in resignation. “Very well… I will also abide by your decision, honored delegates.”

Mayor Mare turned to Twilight. “We need your approval too, Princess Twilight,” she said.

Twilight smiled. “You’ve got it,” she said. “The only thing I ask is that you make an honest, informed decision. I’d like to speak before you to tell you all about my experiences in TechQuestria. And I’d like Mr. Umahara to come as well.”

Umahara jerked his head back. “Me?!” he exclaimed.

“You know more about what TechQuestria is capable of than anypony,” Twilight said. “And that includes all the positive advancements they’ve made. If we’re going to make this truly a fair decision, the delegates deserve to know everything.”

Mayor Mare smiled. “That sounds like a wonderful idea,” she said.

“Yes, quite!” Fancy Pants said.

“Well, then let’s stop talkin’ about it and get down to business!” the Mayor of Manehatten said, turning to go.

Twilight, Umahara, and Mayor Mare went with him, but Fancy Pants stayed a moment longer, going over to Turing Test.

“I am of course relieved to see Princess Twilight and you all unharmed,” he said, glancing over to the others. “But I am most happy to see you in one piece again, Miss Turing. I was quite shaken by the news from Ponyville when you were abducted.”

“It is good to see you as well, Fancy Pants,” Turing said. “However, I do wish the circumstances of our reunion were different.”

“As do I,” he said sadly. “I’m afraid I’m needed, but please do remember that I owe you a favor for your aid back in the mountains. I haven’t forgotten it. Indeed, I will never forget it.”

He then turned and followed the others. They had a lot to discuss.

***

The New Dawn circled around overhead. As it turned, ponies on the east side of Canterlot got a full view of it, including the screen that once again came to life.

This section of Canterlot contained the Coliseum, numerous businesses and museums, and even a few residences for some of the less rich among Canterlot’s citizenry. There was also the Royal Canterlot Hospital. Patients with beds near the windows peered outside, as did their doctors, watching as another film began.

“Hello again, everypony!” said Sprocket Rocket’s as he appeared on the screen. The camera zoomed out to show him wearing a doctor’s white coat as he stood next to an empty hospital bed.. “Our next topic is something that affects all of us: our health.”

The screen transitioned to a title card that read, simply, “MEDICAL SCIENCE.”

“Yes, we’ve all had our cuts and bruises,” Sprocket went on to say as cartoon figures were shown of ponies with bumps on their head or bandages on their forelegs. “And quite a few of us have ended up in the hospital for one thing or another…” Here the cartoon showed a pony in a hospital bed with a broken hind leg in traction. “Nopony wants to think about getting sick, but as we all get older, the odds of needing to go to the hospital for something serious go up dramatically. Why, even at middle age, 1 in 10 ponies will need serious medical care!”

The ponies below all watched this with growing interest, especially the patients and doctors watching from the hospital windows.

“Under Celestia’s rule, medical trials are tightly restricted,” Sprocket Rocket said. “We won’t bore you with the details, but fewer than 5% of all new treatments per year make it through the rigorous testing process. And believe me, we here in TechQuestria are all for being careful… but just the same, we think there’s such a thing as being too careful. That’s why we’ve done our own testing on new medicines that we felt the Ministry of Health never gave a fair chance, in addition to running our own. What did we find?”

The screen showed footage of test tubes and syringes being filled and doctors examining x-rays. Over this montage, a list began to scroll upward on the screen as Sprocket narrated.

“We’ve discovered cures for Bucker’s Hips, ulcers, and meningitis. We’ve found ways to remove kidney stones without the need for surgery, along with some innovations to reduce the invasiveness of others. We’ve even got vaccines for the ponypox and some kinds of the flu! But one of our greatest breakthroughs led to the founding of TechQuestria in the first place…”

The screen showed a picture of Georgia Peach wearing an elegant dress, her mane done up in her signature curls.

“This is Georgia Peach, the daughter of Cobbler Mustang,” Sprocket Rocket said solemnly. “She was a vivacious, kind-hearted young mare, loved by all who knew her.”

The screen then showed montage of images showing her as a filly, playing with friends, digging in her garden, having tea parties, and sleeping soundly in her bed.

“What I’m about to tell you,” Sprocket said, “is the tale of a father and a scientist who tried to save her, and the Princess and royal ministers who stood in his way. You’ll hear about a wonderful invention that could have saved countless lives, but has instead been pushed aside. Fillies and gentlecolts, we’ll tell you how Georgia Peach lived, and also why she died…”

The ponies below all watched as the story unfolded. The ponies in the hospital in particular watched with great interest. When it was over, Sprocket Rocket left the audience with his usual words condemning Celestia and urging the ponies to embrace the new future they were offering, all while playing a montage of Georgia’s life from a filly, to her days of illness, to her temporary recovery with the artificial heart, to her final months.

As the screen went dark and the transmission ended, some ponies below began to discuss the story they’d just heard. Some said this was all just a revenge plot and all the political talk was a ruse. Others felt their hearts go out for the young girl who’d died and the father who’d tried to save her. But many others, those who’d been sick or seen relatives fall ill, began to wonder what had been held back and what could have been.

In the hospital, a doctor standing at the window heard a small voice behind him.

“Doctor?” the girl asked as he went over to her bedside. “Do you think it’s true? I mean,” she said, placing a hoof on her chest, “could they really give me a new heart? I know you said I’m almost at the top of the list, but…”

The doctor swallowed a lump in his throat as he patted her hoof. “I’m not certain,” he said. “But I promise you I will look into it, no matter what else happens, okay?”

The little filly smiled and pulled up the covers as she tried to go back to sleep. Her doctor went back to the window. He, like many other doctors throughout the hospital, were wondering what other treatments their ailing patients were missing out on. They wondered how they might have alleviated their suffering…

***

The group of them, save for Twilight and Umahara, stood on the small balcony, watching as the transmission came to an end. Though the New Dawn was now on the other side of Canterlot, the screen had been big enough to still see the images clearly, and the drones floating around the castle had broadcasted the message loud and clear.

Celestia heaved a sigh as she went back inside. Luna came alongside her as the others parted to make a path for her.

“I never heard the whole truth,” Applejack said. “Just the little bit I heard from Valentine about 001.”

“Whoa whoa whoa,” Rainbow Dash said, rubbing her head. “Hang on… I mean, all that stuff isn’t really true, is it?”

They all looked to Celestia, who still had her back to them. She didn’t respond.

“Surely it’s at least a bit of an exaggeration!” Rarity offered hopefully. “Princess Celestia, I’m sure that--”

“What that film stated was an oversimplification,” Celestia said quietly, “but it is true. I held back Professor Mustang’s invention.”

“Well, it wasn’t you, really,” Fluttershy said, taking to the air to hover before Celestia, giving her a kind smile. “It was your ministers, like they said!”

“Yes, exactly!” Luna said, nodding her head emphatically. “Sister, you mustn’t blame yourself for the decisions--”

“Luna, you know as well as I do, that we are at least partly responsible for the decisions of the advisors we choose,” Celestia said. “And ultimately, the decisions made against Cobbler and Dr. Umahara were mine.”

There were quiet for a moment. Then Applejack broke the silence, asking, “So, where are those two advisors now?”

“Medicine Hat retired a few years ago,” Celestia said. “Noble Gas, however, I personally dismissed not long after Georgia Peach’s passing. I discovered that he was very likely taking money and favors from ponies who asked him for favors in return. Among them were the ponies who produce medicines used in heart treatments. When I discovered that, I revisited Professor Mustang’s case and realized that he was probably right not to trust his invention in Noble Gas’s hooves. There wasn’t enough evidence to be conclusive, so he was not charged with any crime. Nonetheless, I’ve seen to it that he holds no position of leadership in Equestria.”

She made a sour face. “I was a fool…”

“No, sister!” Luna cried. “You still did what you thought would best serve the public good! You would not let ponies risk their lives just to test his invention!”

“I would not let ponies,” Celestia echoed, a rueful laugh escaping her. “Even the way you say it shows the truth: I was afraid to let ponies make that choice. I have always tried to give my subjects the freedom to choose, to make their own decisions in life… and yet I still fear the loss of a life, even when it’s their own life to choose. Perhaps I should have been more open-minded.”

She turned to Gadget, who’d been silent the whole time. “Cornelius Vanderbull told you that story about me, didn’t he?” she asked. “The one about the trains and the circus.”

“Oh!” Gadget said, her ears perking up. “Y-yes, he did!”

“I think back on how little I thought about those machines,” she said, “and how important they eventually became. Yet I was too blind to see until he made them personal for me. By giving them my approval, overnight they became a force to be reckoned with. I should have known from then how much weight my word carried.

“When I appointed those ministers, I chose ponies I thought would suit the job. But now I wonder… perhaps, rather than making up their own minds, they simply acted in a way that they thought would please me. That would explain why Medicine Hat thought I would approve of euthanizing those test subjects.”

“W-what?!” Fluttershy gasped.

Celestia heaved a sigh, meeting her gaze. “That is how Professor Mustang tested his artificial heart,” she said. “He tested his device on animals. Pigs, to be exact. Many died in the process. When his experiments were discovered, Medicine Hat believed it to be kinder to euthanize the rest.”

“But… but why?!” Fluttershy shouted, bursting into tears. “Why would he use poor, innocent animals in his--”

“Because the data he was gathering would help him anticipate complications in his daughter’s heart,” Celestia said. “And without them, he was unable to anticipate the blood clotting that eventually killed her.”

Fluttershy gawked at her, her mouth hanging open. “I… but…”

She swallowed, lowering her head as she turned, a distraught look in her eyes. “I need a moment,” she said quietly, and began to walk away.

Rainbow Dash watched her go and turned to the others. “Hey, I’ll keep an eye on her too, okay?” she said. “Don’t worry about us, we’ll catch up with you later.”

Rainbow flew after Fluttershy, leaving the others to themselves.

“Turing Test,” Celestia said suddenly, her head staying in place as she glanced over at the mechanical mare. “You’ve been rather quiet about all this. Do you have any thoughts you’d like to share?”

Turing Test’s eyes momentarily constricted as she looked up at Celestia. “You wish to know my opinion?” she asked.

Celestia turned and nodded.

“I am not certain that I am qualified to make any sort of judgment about your actions,” Turing said.

Celestia smiled. “Of course you are, Turing,” she said.

“I agree,” Luna said. “In the time I’ve known you, I’ve found you to be an intelligent and thoughtful pony. Despite your despicable creator, you are something truly special. With your keen mechanical mind, surely there must be some thoughts you can share with us!”

Turing lowered her head. “I have thoughts,” she replied. “I have so many thoughts. There are questions I have about the nature of freedom, the nature of grief, the nature of regret, and safety, and technology, and so many other things. I wish I had no part in it.

“I wish… I sometimes wish that I had not been born a robot,” she whispered. “I wish I had been a normal organic pony, that my father and my sisters and brother all had happy lives, and that I could simply return home with my friends. I only wish for peace and happiness for myself and my friends and family.

“And yet, despite these wishes, I am involved.” She turned to look out the window at the airship looming in the distance. “Were it not for Georgia Peach’s death, I would not be here. My whole existence is tied to my father’s plan.”

“What do you mean, Rinny?” Pinkie asked.

“She means,” Applejack sighed, pulling down the brim of her hat, “that she an’ all the other robots are based on Cobbler’s daughter. They did somethin’ with tryin’ to preserve her mind in a mechanical body. That’s how they got all the robots, startin’ with 001!”

The others gasped, their eyes turning to Turing Test. But behind her, they heard a small voice.

“Not Joja,” 001 said, quietly. She shook her head. “Me not Joja. Not Joja!”

Turing reached for her. “001, it is--”

“Not Joja!” 001 screamed, and she turned, taking off to run down the hall.

“001, come back!” Applejack shouted, reaching for her to no avail. She looked to Turing Test. “Ah jeez, Turing Test, I’m sorry! I didn’t know she’d--”

“It is all right,” Turing said, walking away. “I will be able to catch up to her. You should consider potential avenues to protect Canterlot. I will tend to my sister and join you later.”

They watched as she dashed away, her body a silver blur and the sound of her hooves a rapidly diminishing staccato before she vanished around a corner.

***

Along the wall between watchtowers, the TechQuestrian guards patrolled, keeping an eye out for any counterattacks by the Royal Guard or for any citizens who decided to do something heroic.

A pegasus mare guard was passing an earth pony stallion guard when they heard a sound coming from below.

“Check that noise,” the earth pony guard said to the pegasus.

“I’m on it!” she said, priming her stun baton and pulling down her gas mask. She took to the air and flew down to the base of the guard tower where there was a flight of steps leading to an underground storage area. “I’m going in. Notify HQ, please.”

The earth pony guard placed his hoof to his radio earpiece. “HQ, this is guard tower 8. We’re checking out a possible disturbance. Please stand by in case we need reinforcements.”

“Copy that.”

The pegasus mare went down the steps into the storeroom. The earth pony watched as she disappeared through the door. There were a few moments of silence and he began to tense up, but then the pegasus mare reemerged from the store room.

“Sir, there’s a raccoon down here,” she said, rolling her eyes. “Can you help me herd it out? It’s just going to cause more trouble if we let it roam free.”

He let out a sigh of relief. “Sure,” he replied, and climbed the ladder down from the wall, following her into the storeroom.

“All right, so where is this raccoon?” he asked as he walked past her.

“Over in the corner,” she said. “I’ll prime my stun baton in case it runs out into the open.”

The earth pony guard moved to the corner, gingerly moving a wooden crate, on his guard in case the raccoon turned to bite back.

When he moved the box, he froze. What he saw was not a raccoon, but the pegasus mare lying unconscious, deprived of her stun baton and gas mask.

“What--” was all he managed to say before the pegasus mare behind him shocked him as well, knocking him out.

As he dropped to the ground, the “mare” behind him shifted his shape back into his familiar form.

“That’s a few more,” Idol Hooves said, dragging the guard into the corner as he prepared to tie them both up. Then he heard a sound from the earth pony guard’s radio earpiece. He changed form, assuming the earth pony guard’s shape as he plucked out the earpiece.

“Tower 8, I repeat, report in. Is everything all right? Do you need help?”

“Negative,” Idol said in the earth pony guard’s voice. “It was only a raccoon.” He grinned; being a changeling held some distinct advantages.

“A raccoon?”

“Yes. It was making noise so we used our electrical weapons to kill it. However, the storeroom wherein we exterminated it now smells of burnt animal fur. It is quite distasteful. I would not recommend going in there if I could avoid it, but--”

“Okay, yes, I get it. Carry on with your patrol.”

Idol confiscated the other weapons as he bound the guards, gagging them. Hopefully it would take some time before they were noticed to be missing. In the meantime, he would deliver the things he’d confiscated to the Princesses.

***

“...you’ve heard about my experience in TechQuestria,” Twilight said, standing at the podium before the gathered crowd of delegates as they sat in the large meeting hall, “and you’ve heard from Mr. Umahara as well. You now know the harm they’ve done and can do, as well as the good things they might bring. I know many of you may be tempted to make a decision based on your anger or your fears, but I’d urge you all to make a decision based on a simple question: What’s best for Equestria?

“Along with that, please consider the questions that go along with it. Do you think the country really would be better as a democracy? Is the prospect of war better or worse than facing an occupation by TechQuestria? For the first time in Equestria’s history, the fate of the entire nation is in the hooves of ponies chosen by the citizens. I believe you are worthy of this trust, and now you will decide if this is the sort of government you want Equestria to have from now on, or if it should stay under royal rule. I have sworn to abide by your decision, as have the other princesses, so please decide based on your loyalty to the country, not to myself or any other princess. Thank you all.”

As she stepped from the podium, the sound of a pony applauding was heard from crowd. She looked to see Mayor Mare standing and clapping her hooves. A moment later she was joined by other delegates around her. A moment after that, the entire hall echoed with applause.

Twilight choked back tears, placing her hoof to her chest as she bowed to them. She turned to go, Umahara right beside her.

“You know,” Umahara whispered as they walked to the exit, “I should apologize.”

Twilight was about to agree, but then she realized she didn’t actually know what he meant, so she only looked to him with a quizzical expression.

“I once thought you were unworthy to be a ruler. I thought you gave up your old role as a scholar to take on the title of Princess because Celestia assigned it to you. When I was a spy in Ponyville, still calling myself Fine Print, I thought you were a joke. But seeing what you accomplished with 003-- er, with Turing Test, and hearing you speak just now… I was wrong. You are a leader, and you deserve the trust that’s been placed in you.”

Twilight smiled. “That’s good of you to say,” she said. “But now it’s time to step aside and let other ponies make the decision. It’s out of my hooves now.”

“Well, you know,” Umahara said, raising an eyebrow as they went through the exit, shutting the doors behind them, “if they vote for a democracy, you could tell Cobbler that you’re interested in being the President after all.”

Twilight rolled her eyes. “I think that giant, metal airship has sailed,” she said. “Maybe you should think about running!”

“Me?” he asked, furrowing his brow. “I doubt I could win. I mean, I betrayed two different sides, and I’ll be lucky to get out of this without being charged with treason by at least one of them. Nopony’d vote for me!”

“Stabbing both sides in the back?” Twilight asked with a smirk. “Sounds like a politician to me!”

Umahara snorted as he broke into a laugh. “Well… let’s hope you’re wrong about politicians. Right now, a room full of them are going to make the decision of a lifetime for us.”

***

Cobbler’s head was pounding. He’d taken some aspirin, but it wasn’t helping. He’d even been tempted to pour himself a glass from the bottle of peach brandy he’d stored in his quarters, but he’d abstained, knowing that he’d need all his mental faculties for the work ahead. Perhaps after the constitution had been signed, a small glass to celebrate…

They won’t sign.

He clutched his head, shutting his eyes.

“Sir.”

They will never sign.

The pressure behind his eyes increased, and he sharply drew in a deep breath.

“Sir?”

You know how to solve this. You know. Only one way...

“Sir!”

“What?!” Cobbler roared.

He was face to face with Hill Hiker. He was still sitting in his chair, commanding the New Dawn. All of the bridge crew had turned their heads and were staring at him.

“Ah,” Cobbler said, smoothing down his jacket. “Yes, Mr. Hiker?”

“I was just letting you know that the Wonderbolts have been sighted at the edge of the barrier around the city,” Hiker said. “They obviously can’t penetrate the barrier, but Commander Spitfire has been briefed on the situation.”

“I see,” Cobbler said. “And…?”

“Well, they seem to be standing by. Well, not ‘standing,’ more ‘flying in circles,’ but they appear to just be monitoring the situation.”

“I see,” he said. “Any other reports? Everything all right on the ground? Or any word from the palace?”

“No complications reported by the ground forces,” Hiker replied. “And no word from the palace, either. But they do have just under an hour left to respond.”

“Hmm. I see,” he said, leaning back in his chair. “Carry on, then.”

“Aye, sir.”

Silence settled in over the cabin for a few moments, but then Hiker leaned over to Cobbler.

“Mr. President?” HIker asked.

“Yes, Mr. Hiker?” Cobbler asked back, raising his eyebrow, a flash of annoyance crossing his face.

“Sir, you really seem like you’re not feeling well,” Hiker said. “Why don’t you go and rest? If need be, I will be glad to handle the situation until you’re feeling better.”

Cobbler narrowed his eyes and turned with excruciating slowness toward Hiker.

“Mr. Hiker, will you please see me in my cabin?” Cobbler asked.

Hiker nodded and followed Cobbler from the bridge to the small cabin.

“Mr. Hiker,” Cobbler began, his back to Hiker as he looked out the small portal window at Canterlot below, “do you remember how you felt when you received your cutie mark?”

Hiker puffed out his chest. “Yes, sir,” he said, smiling at the memory.

“As do I,” he said. “I believe most ponies do. We talk around it a lot, I suppose, but it all boils down to that feeling of discovering one’s destiny. Do you know what I mean?”

“I do,” Hiker said.

“I’m still not certain such a thing exists,” he said, “but the idea of finding that one perfect thing in your life that gives you meaning, that gives you purpose, still feels powerful. It seems as though every pony, no matter who they are, has a purpose for their lives.

“So then,” Cobbler asked, his voice growing quieter, “what was Georgia’s purpose?”

Hiker froze. “I… I mean, her cutie mark--”

“I’m aware of her skills in horticulture,” Cobbler said. “I mean that she received her cutie mark, she did her best to pursue it despite her condition, and was in the prime of her life, finally studying her passion at one of the most prestigious schools in Equestria.

“And then she died,” he whispered. “She died without ever seeing her dreams come true. As if none of it ever mattered. As if she’d been cheated out of her destiny. She died for absolutely no reason at all.”

Hiker swallowed. “I’m… not sure what to say, sir.”

“Mr. Hiker, there’s nothing you need to say,” Cobbler said, his back still turned to him. “You simply need to understand my position. My sweet baby died without realizing her destiny, but in doing so she has motivated me to give Equestria a brighter future, one where no other child has to suffer like she did. At long last, I will give her death some meaning, and perhaps she can rest more peacefully. For ten long years I’ve been striving to create a better nation and get some justice for the child I could not save. I want to be there to see it to the end. You wouldn’t deny an old stallion that much, would you?”

Hiker bowed his head. “No,” he said. “Forgive me, sir. I’m sorry, I didn’t realize--”

“Water under the bridge, Mr. Hiker,” Cobbler said, raising a hoof, his back still turned to Hiker. “Now then, please return to the bridge. I shall join you there momentarily.”

Hiker clicked his hooves and saluted, exiting the quarters and leaving Cobbler alone.

The older stallion, now that he was by himself, wiped his eyes. He hadn’t wanted Hiker to see him cry, but just the same it was becoming increasingly hard to talk about Georgia without tearing up.

Then the pain seized him again, and he lurched forward, bracing himself against the wall with his forehooves.

“W-what,” he gasped, “is this?!”

You have the power. Take what you want.

“I… I don’t understand!”

Only one way. They won’t listen. Only one way. They don’t understand. They don’t understand...

Again a sudden sense of euphoria broke through the pain, and he gulped down a deep breath.

“Yes,” he whispered, his gaze transfixed on the sight of Canterlot Castle through the portal, “I’ll make them understand…”

***

001 ran through the halls of Canterlot Castle. She turned corner after corner, up a flight of stairs, down another, and right past groups of Royal Guards who were too confused and slow to stop the nimble robot from simply sprinting around them.

She didn’t stop until she slammed headfirst into a glowing magical shield that suddenly appeared right in front of her.

She stumbled back, awkwardly kicking her legs without coordination as she scrambled to her hooves, finally right herself. It was then that she saw Turing Test standing before her. Her younger sister was now in U-Mode, having projected the shield to finally stop her.

“Turry Tess?” 001 asked quietly.

“I am here, 001,” she said. “Please do not run. I will simply catch you again.”

001 lowered her head. “Tag, me it,” she said mirthlessly.

Turing retracted her horn, returning to neutral mode as she approached her sister, realizing she wasn’t going to run again. The shield dissipated .

“Are you all right, 001?” Turing asked. “Do you wish to talk about it?”

001 shook her head. “No talk,” she said. “No raisin no talk. Me not Joja.”

Turing turned her head, glancing out the tall, ornate window at the end of the hallway. The New Dawn was still there, still circling overhead like a great bird of prey. She walked to the window and rested her hooves on the window sill.

“No, 001, you are not Georgia Peach,” she said. “But that is not important.”

001 went to her and stood in the same position, putting her hooves on the window sill, taking care to imitate her.

“Im-por-tant,” 001 said. “If me Joja, Not Dada be Dada again. But me not Joja. You not Joja. We no good.” She began to shake her head. “No good, no good. We no good, we junk heaps, we--”

Turing placed her hoof on 001’s shoulder, causing her to lock eyes with her.

“Do not say that again, 001,” Turing said, her voice calm, but stern. “We were each created for a purpose, and I once desired to know what that purpose was. But discovering the truth brought me no answers. It only brought distress. The organics would call it ‘heartache,’ though we possess neither hearts, nor the ability to ache.”

001’s ears twitched. “Turry Tess talky talk,” she muttered.

“Ah. I apologize,” Turing said. “What I am attempting to convey is that I have recognized my significance and value for what I am, not what I was created for. 002 told me that existence was meaningless, and perhaps that is so. However, even if life has no inherent meaning, I have found meaning in my own life through my interactions with my friends. The emotions I have experienced, including the joy of understanding them and the pain of not being able to, has strengthened me. What I am saying is that we are not ‘junk heaps.’ It does not matter that we are not Georgia Peach. We must take pride in what we are. Do you understand?”

001 tapped her head, producing a metallic ringing sound. “Me not Joja… but that okay?”

Turing nodded. “Affirmative. You are 001, and I like you very much for being 001. I hope that we will have a long and fulfilling friendship as sisters.”

001 moved closer to Turing. She put her head on Turing’s shoulder. “Me like Turry Tess too,” she whispered.

Turing Test put her foreleg over 001’s shoulders. The two of them stayed like that, staring up at the ship.

“Why we like dis?” 001 asked.

“Like… this?” Turing asked.

“We rowboats,” 001 said, tapping her head again. “Why we rowboats?”

“Ah. I understand,” Turing said. “I do not know why we were born as robots. I admit that understanding organic ponies is often difficult. When I was first activated, I cared nothing for myself, and only wished to please my end user, Twilight Sparkle. But by carrying out my directive of making friends, I began to understand my own worth. Being robots does not signify inferiority. It only signifies that we are different. And in being different, we are special.”

001 nodded. “We special,” she said.

Turing Test’s ears squeaked on their hinges. “Is that what you wished for me to learn, Twilight Sparkle?”

She turned around, 001 doing the same. Twilight and Applejack were both standing just a short distance away, watching them from behind the tall pillars in the castle hallway..

“I’d say you’ve learned a lot, Turing,” Twilight said, laughing as she wiped away the tears that were forming.

“Hi, Tailai! Hi, Appajack!” 001 said, bounding over to them.

“Hey there, Sugarcube,” Applejack said, hugging 001 and ruffling her mane. “Heh heh… I guess you heard us when we first showed up, didn’t ya, Turing?”

“Affirmative,” Turing said, giving a short nod. “But I saw no point in mentioning it. If 001 did not notice you and you did not wish to intrude, then it was logical to let you continue monitoring us.”

“Well, I didn’t mean to eavesdrop,” Twilight said, blushing slightly.

“But since we did,” Applejack said, smiling warmly at Turing, “I want you to know somethin’: yer a good sister, Turing Test.”

Turing bowed to her. “Thank you, Applejack,” she said. “That means a lot to me coming from you. Despite all the other awful things that have happened, I at last know that I have a family of my own, and it truly is wonderful. If I am indeed a good sister, then it is only because I learned from one of the best.”

Applejack wore a proud grin, but even she couldn’t keep the blush from her cheeks. “Lan’ sakes, Turing,” she said. “If you keep talkin’ like that, you'll get me blubberin’ again.”

“Ah, I did not wish to be the cause of any blubbering,” Turing said. “Did you require my assistance? Or did you come in search of my sister?”

“Well, Applejack said she didn’t really feel like talking about military strategies with Celestia and Luna,” Twilight said, “so when I found her looking for you two, I decided to join her. And that’s when we found you both here.”

“Understood,” Turing said. “Have the delegates reached a decision yet regarding the TechQuestrian constitution?”

Twilight shook her head. “No, but they will soon,” Twilight replied. “The guards are keeping them posted about the time.”

“According to my internal chronometer, they have 36 minutes left to reach a decision,” Turing said.

Twilight’s smile faded. “It’s… strange to think about Equestria’s fate being decided so quickly.” She sighed. “Well… the others are probably waiting for us. Should we head back?”

Turing Test glanced over her shoulder, looking out the window at the New Dawn as it continued to circle overhead with an almost eerie silence.

“Before we do,” Turing replied, “I have come to a few conclusions regarding our current situation. I wish to share them with you, if you have a few minutes to spare.”

Twilight and Applejack looked to each other, then back to Turing Test. All the while, 001 continued nuzzling Applejack’s neck.

“Sure. What’s on your mind, Turing?” Twilight asked.

“Firstly, I have decided that I cannot accept a war,” she said. “I have so many friends in Ponyville, including both of you and our mutual acquaintances. A war would most likely disrupt their lives, keeping them from the things they love. Our home may be engulfed in battle. Ponies we care about may be exiled. They may even be killed. And that is something I cannot accept.

“Every life is precious to me. That is what I truly came to understand when I was rescued from the crevasse in the Everfree Forest. Due to my mechanical nature, I will remember every pony I have ever met. Every moment with every friend, or even every stranger, will be preserved in my mind for as long as I am able to remain operational. After all my experiences, I have concluded that every life is important, and the loss of even one is totally unacceptable.

“And yet some ponies on both sides are willing to go to war,” she said, shaking her head. “I cannot understand it.”

Twilight bowed her head, shutting her eyes. “I know how you feel,” she said. “It’s… complicated.”

“Perhaps so,” she said. “But that leads me to my next conclusion: I believe this can be resolved through the things you’ve taught me me, Twilight Sparkle. I believe this conflict has its origins in negative feelings, and that extending friendship can end it.”

“Heh,” Applejack chuckled. “She’s yer student all right, Twilight.” Then, growing serious, she said, “But, uh, just the same… I’m not sure this is somethin’ we can solve like a run o’ the mill friendship problem.”

Turing tapped her chin. “Celestia once feared technology due to her experience with automata,” she said. “Her attitude toward technology was the genesis of all of this. And yet our friendship overcame Celestia’s fear, and now she and I are also friends. She once considered me so expendable that she was willing to have me destroyed or confined. Now she has granted me full rights as a citizen, no different from any organic pony.”

Twilight smiled. “You’re right, Turing,” she said. “You overcame a hundred years of fear and mistrust when nopony else could.”

“And that is why I believe the end of this conflict may also lie in extending my friendship to another,” she said. “My father.”

Twilight’s smile faded. “I… Turing, that’s…” She trailed off, averting her eyes.

“I understand your misgivings, Twilight Sparkle,” Turing said, holding up a hoof. “But if Cobbler Mustang’s desire for a revolution was born out of his grief for Georgia Peach and bitterness toward Celestia, then perhaps those emotions can also be supplanted by friendship. If my father’s loss could be eased by seeing what he has gained, if he could see me and my siblings as his children, then perhaps his heart would soften.”

Twilight let out a long sigh. “Turing, I would love to tell you that I agree,” she said. “But some ponies… Cobbler’s filled with so much hatred. Even after everything that’s happened, he still thinks of you and the others as simple machines. You can’t really--”

“I think she’s right,” Applejack said, cutting her off.

Twilight whipped her head around, staring at Applejack. “Applejack? You?! After seeing what he did to us all? After seeing how he treated 001?!”

001 lowered her head, but Applejack put her foreleg around her, holding her close.

“It’s true that I don’t think too highly about that smooth talkin’ snake in the grass,” she said. “He’s done a lot o’ bad things. But we’ve given a lots o’ ponies second chances even when they didn’t deserve ‘em. An’ it don’t really matter what I think. What matters is what Turing thinks.”

She smiled at Turing and the robot’s ears perked up.

“You just want yer daddy back,” she said, smiling at Turing. “Ain’t that right? If I had a chance to have my daddy back… if I could make my family whole again… well, I know I’d move mountains to make it happen. That’s how ya feel, ain’t it?”

Turing Test bowed her head. “Affirmative,” she said softly. “If I can ease my father’s pain, if I can make him remember the kind pony and caring father he once was… perhaps we can end this peacefully.”

She raised her head, meeting Twilight’s gaze. “Twilight Sparkle, I want to speak to him.”

Twilight opened her mouth to speak.

“Hey!” shouted a new voice. They all turned to see Rainbow Dash. “There you guys are! The delegates are back! They’re gonna message TechQuestria in just a few minutes! We’ve gotta get back there right now!”

***

They arrived amid the chaos of all the other delegates entering the ballroom. They quickly spotted Celestia and Luna, who were flanked by the Royal Guards, along with Gadget, Spike, Rarity, Pinkie Pie, and Fluttershy.

“Celestia!” Twilight exclaimed, galloping over to her side. “What did they decide?”

“To tell the truth, Twilight, I’m not certain,” she replied. Then she smiled. “However, I’ve heard that your presentation to the delegates was very informative. You and Umahara seem to have given them all the information that they needed.”

Twilight returned the smile as Turing Test, 001, Rainbow Dash, and Applejack arrived behind her.

“I see you are back,” Celestia said. “Thank you for finding them, Rainbow Dash.”

“No problem!” Rainbow Dash said.

“And are you feeling better, 001?” Celestia asked, leaning down and speaking to her like a filly.

“Me okay,” 001 said. “Turry Tess good sissa.”

Celestia chuckled, looking to Turing. “Indeed she is.”

Perhaps we will see if I can also be a good daughter, Turing added mentally.

The crowd of delegates grew quiet, and Fancy Pants, their chosen representative, came forward. Celestia, Luna, and Twilight all turned to meet him by the golden messenger drone, which was still sitting by the doors of the ballroom.

“You’ve reached a decision?” Celestia asked.

“Yes, Your Majesties,” Fancy Pants said, bowing.

“And what did you decide?” Luna asked.

“Well… with all due respect,” Fancy Pants said, “We decided that I should announce it to you and to the TechQuestrians at the same time. We feel that running it by you for your approval first may taint their perception of it.”

The three princesses all exchanged a look.

“It sounds like you think that we won’t like it,” Twilight said quietly.

“You may not,” Fancy Pants said, raising his chin and standing firm. “But we think this is the optimal solution.”

Celestia bowed her head. “In that case, you may contact TechQuestria when ready. We all await your decision.”

Fancy Pants bowed in return and went to the messenger, pressing the red button to signal TechQuestria.

“Attention New Dawn,” he said. “This is Fancy Pants, and I am speaking to you on behalf of the delegates of the Equestrian National Conference. Can you hear me?”

The communications officer’s voice came through the speaker. “We read you. Please stand by for the President.”

A moment later, Cobbler’s voice was heard. “This is Professor Mustang speaking. I must say, I’m pleased that you arrived at a decision before your time expired. I was afraid y’all might keep us waiting until the last minute.

“So… what is the news? Have the Princesses abdicated? How many delegates have signed the constitution?”

Fancy Pants cleared his throat. “That’s… not exactly what was decided.”

There was a notable pause on the other end. “Oh really?” Cobbler asked, an edge to his voice. “Well now… I await hearing what you did decide with great interest.”

“It’s quite simple, really,” Fancy Pants said. “You and your comrades want democracy. You want us to act as the first congress of your new republic. We decided to act in that capacity and took a vote, with the princesses all declaring that we had the authority to decide how to proceed. Our decision is the first democratically decided bit of national policy in Equestrian history. We wanted you to know that.”

Another notable pause. “I must say,” Cobbler breathed, “that is not what we expected. Very well then… what did you decide?”

Fancy Pants withdrew a few sheets of parchment from his coat and unfolded them. “I hold in my hoof a proposal. A treaty, you might say,” he said, “which would allow TechQuestria to secede and become its own legally-recognized nation.”

Celestia’s eyes widened. Luna’s jaw dropped. Both, however, kept silent.

“We will even be glad to work out where you might establish your new republic,” Fancy Pants said. “Perhaps something in your native Mustangia? Or perhaps a large island? We’d be more than willing to discuss it and decide on something fair. You and your scientists can retain all ownership of your inventions, which, after today’s demonstrations, may prove quite popular in Equestria. We will even provide the funds to help you get started and forgive any outstanding debts you may have… after all, that ship of yours looks quite expensive.”

There was muffled speech from Cobbler’s side.

“All we ask is that we end this without violence,” Fancy Pants said. “Sir, the Mustangian delegate spoke of you as a kind and generous gentlecolt of your home region. I urge you to consider what is best for both sides. Let us live in peace, and we will grant you the same dignity.”

Fancy Pants looked over to the princesses. At first, there was no reaction on any of their faces. But after exchanging mutual looks, Celestia gave a short nod. She stepped forward.

“What Fancy Pants said is true, Professor Mustang,” she said. “We gave our word that we would honor what the delegates voted on. If their decision is to let you secede to your own nation, then we will abide by that.”

There was silence. Then it was followed by a chuckle which grew into scornful laughter.

“Your only decision was to accept surrender or not,” Cobbler said. “We came here to offer freedom to Equestria, not to establish a new colony! We will not step aside while you all languish under-- what? That’s…”

There was more muffled speech from the other side. It sounded like an argument held just out of earshot. A moment later, Cobbler returned.

“As I was saying,” Cobbler continued. “Freedom is an imperative, and so is technology. Equestria will accept both, whether you cooperate or not. You have less than half an hour left, so I suggest you get back to deciding whether to sign the constitution or not. I consider myself a patient pony, but I will not wait any longer than that, and I will not tolerate any more of these ridiculous distractions.

“Good luck with your deliberations,” he said. “We’ll be in touch.”

The transmission ended, leaving the ballroom in silence.

To be continued…

The Lionhearted, Part 3

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They broke the walls we guarded
But we don't care about it
We'll finish what we started
So promise me that
We'll be the lionhearted
For we don't care about it
We'll finish what we started
So promise me that they'll fall...
-"Lionhearted" by Porter Robinson

“Mr. Hiker, how dare you!” Cobbler roared, wheeling on him. “My own first officer cutting in on negotiations when we’re supposed to be putting forth a united front… outrageous!”

Hill Hiker stood his ground. “Sir, with all due respect, how dare you?!” he shouted back. “We never expected them to offer anything like that. We thought they would either surrender or choose to fight, but what they offered was a fair compromise! We could all have our freedom, TechQuestria could survive, and we could avoid a war!”

“And leave Equestria in an age of darkness?!” Cobbler demanded. “Under that tyrant Celestia?!”

Hiker’s gaze grew stonier. “You’ve said again and again that this isn’t about revenge, sir,” he said. “Now we get a resolution to this issue, one that was voted on democratically I might add, and you won’t even consider it? Just because it leaves Celestia in power?!”

“No!”

Yes.

“No!” Cobbler shouted. “It’s because we have a higher duty to free all ponies, not just ourselves!”

“We could let our nation serve as an example!” Hiker shot back. “Equestria would see how wonderful our new nation had become and demand to become a democracy! We could--”

Silence.

“Silence!” Cobbler shouted.

He was breathing hard, and as he glanced around at the rest of the bridge crew, he saw their nervousness, and the mistrustful, unsure look they were giving him.

He doesn’t stand with us. They do not have what it takes. They are too weak. Only one way.

Cobbler took a deep breath, calming himself down. “Mr. Hiker, I appreciate your opinion, but the decision has been made. We have a job to do, and I will not compromise. We shall establish freedom for all of Equestria and nothing less. Now, if you cannot abide by that, then I will be forced to relieve you of duty.”

Hiker gave him a sour look. “I believe in our cause,” he said, “but if we can achieve our goals through compromise without anypony being hurt, then I won’t support a war.”

Anger flashed in Cobbler’s eyes, but he kept calm. “Mr. Hiker, you’re relieved of duty until further notice,” he said. “Please return to your quarters.”

Hill Hiker gave a short nod and a salute. “Understood, sir,” he said. “I stand relieved.”

As Hiker left the bridge, Cobbler took his seat, noticing that the bridge crew was still watching him uncertainly.

“Please focus on your duties, everypony,” Cobbler said. “Deploy another film for our audience, and inform our forces to begin arming themselves with weapons and spell cards. In half an hour, if we do not receive the answer we were looking for, we’ll begin the siege of Canterlot Castle.”

***

The small meeting room was eerily quiet. Celestia, Luna, and Twilight all stood at the round table littered with papers and blueprints. The captain of the Royal Guard stood there before them, a group of other high-ranking guards lining the room. Turing Test and the others stood nearby.

“Captain,” Celestia whispered, “based on the rejection of the delegates’ proposal, what are your recommendations?”

“That depends on what you’ve decided, Your Majesties,” the captain said. “We have all pledged our loyalty to you, so if you choose to surrender and accept the TechQuestrian constitution, we will follow your orders.”

Celestia, Twilight, and Luna all exchanged a look. Celestia turned back to the captain.

“We’ve seen what sort of ponies we’d be giving Equestria over to,” she said. “We will not surrender.”

The captain nodded. “That is your decision?” he asked. “All of you?”

“It is,” Luna said.

“Yes,” Twilight said.

“Then here is my proposal,” the captain said, sliding over a series of papers to them.

“These appear to be schematics for secret tunnels under Canterlot Castle leading into the city,” Twilight said, her eyes lighting up. “I never knew these were there!”

“Even among the Royal Guards, they’re only known to a few higher ups,” the captain explained. “They’re to be used only in the event of an evacuation. We will mount a massive defense and attempt a counterattack on the New Dawn. It is possible that we may succeed… but based on everything we’ve learned from Mr. Umahara, the odds are not in our favor.

“In the meantime, for your safety, we will help you all escape from the castle through the underground tunnels. We can keep you hidden in secret safe houses in Canterlot until the opportunity presents itself to spirit you out of the city, most likely when they take down the magical barrier around Canterlot, which Mr. Umahara maintains will have to be taken down at some point to conserve the ship’s thaumatrium reserves. From there, we can regroup with other divisions of the Royal Guard, and seek aid from the Crystal Empire. We can then mount a proper resistance.”

“We’re bringing my friends,” Twilight said, her tone indicating that it was not up for discussion. She turned her head to smile weakly at her companions.

“Of course,” the captain said. “The Elements may still be the greatest weapon to use against TechQuestria. They won’t always have the Harmonic Drive to counter it, at least not on every front.”

“‘Front,’” Twilight said, repeating the word softly. “So it really will be a war.”

“I… don’t see how that can be prevented now,” he said. “Our only hope is to take down the New Dawn and do so now, before they bring in reinforcements.” He sighed. “Once they occupy Canterlot, they’ll likely make use of all its resources. They’ll stock up on food and raw materials and recruit sympathizers. After that… I’m sorry to say it, but I expect they’ll move to the next closest town: Ponyville.”

The others all gasped.

“But Ponyville’s not even a big city!” Rainbow Dash cried. “Why would they take it over?”

“Symbolic victory, for one,” he said. “They’ll control Canterlot Castle, and probably set up shop in Twilight’s castle as well, turning it into a base of operations. Not only that, since it’s an agricultural community, they’ll take control of farms to supply their troops. Sweet Apple Acres will no doubt be among them.”

“No,” Applejack breathed, her knees going weak.

“From there, they’ll target major cities first, like Trottingham, Manehatten, and Vanhoover,” the captain continued.

Hearing those last two cities, Gadget began crying, realizing Mr. Vanderbull and her parents would also be caught up in the chaos.

“And as soon as they can, they’ll target Cloudsdale,” the captain said. “Controlling the Weather Bureau will give them a lot of leverage.”

Fluttershy and Rainbow Dash exchanged a mutual look of horror.

“This can’t be happening,” Rarity whispered, shaking her head and shutting her eyes. “Please say this isn’t happening!”

“I wish it weren’t happening, Rarity,” Twilight said. “But it is.”

“There are at least a few bright sides,” the captain said, trying to smile. “We have an idea of how they’ll attack and a good idea of the interior of the New Dawn thanks to Mr. Umahara, so a counterattack might still be successful. And we also have these…”

He used his magic to hold up a few radio earpieces. “A guardspony who was off duty apparently managed to disable some of their forces and steal these radios,” he said. “We could use them to monitor their radio chatter and potentially stay ahead of them. That’s at least one advantage we have.”

Celestia raised a hoof. “Captain, what about the delegates?” she asked.

The captain bowed his head. “We do not have the numbers to help them all escape,” he said. “I apologize, but I’m afraid most of them will be taken prisoner, at least if they refuse to cooperate, and it seems the vast majority will refuse.”

“They are truly loyal,” Luna whispered. She shook her head. “No… surely we can’t ask them to sacrifice themselves while we escape to safety!”

“I’m sorry, Your Majesty,” the captain said, “but you and the other Princesses represent the whole of Equestria. The others, however much I hate to say it, are not as important to a possible resistance. In defying TechQuestria and facing imprisonment, they may well garner more sympathy for our side. And in the coming months or even years, we will need it.”

Twilight felt a tiny claw on her side and turned to see Spike embracing her.

“I… I guess that’s it, then,” she said.

“We still need to set the radios to TechQuestria’s general frequency,” the captain said.

“All right,” Twilight said. “Gadget, Umahara, would you please help them with that?”

Gadget wiped her eyes and gave a silent nod. Umahara put a hoof around her shoulders and nodded as well.

“Turing Test, you and 001 are coming with us too,” Twilight said. “There’s no way I’ll let them take you back.”

Turing Test, who’d been watching all this in silence, simply stared back at her, still as a statue.

“Twilight Sparkle, may I speak to you alone for a moment?” she asked.

Twilight looked to Celestia, Luna, and the captain, all of whom nodded to her.

“Please hurry,” the captain said. “We need to leave in the next 10 to 15 minutes in order to escape before the TechQuestrian deadline.”

“I understand,” Twilight said, and turned back to Turing Test, following her outside the small room. She shut the door behind her and faced Turing, whose eyes glowed brightly in the dark hallway.

“Twilight Sparkle,” Turing began, “if it were not for your care and friendship, I would not have come to value my own existence. Were it not for that, I would feel no fear now. But I do feel fear. I am terrified of what may happen to my friends, and yet I understand that I must be brave. As you stated earlier, I must act despite my fears. And it is time that I confront one of my greatest fears…”

Twilight frowned, watching Turing Test as she lowered her head, her ears folding back.

“Go on, Turing,” she said.

“I was afraid to imagine an existence that was my sole responsibility,” she said. “From the first moment I can recall, I have belonged to you. When I was granted citizenship, neither you nor I could accept the idea of me as a truly independent being. Perhaps I more so than you, but still you seemed reluctant. I now realize why.

“Twilight Sparkle, you cared for me, taught me how to act, encouraged me, supported me, and even loved me as I became something more,” she said. “Though you did not assist in my creation, your behavior is analogous to a parent. My parent. Twilight Sparkle… you are like a mother to me.”

Twilight felt a lump in her throat. “Turing…”

“But if that is so, then I should accept my own responsibility as a child that has become an adult,” she said. “I have avoided it for too long, but now I am ready to make the choice you gave to me back in Mayor Mare’s office.

“Twilight Sparkle… I ask you to release me from your control and grant me my own independence.”

Twilight’s jaw dropped open. “Turing… I… why now? What do you--”

“Please, Twilight Sparkle,” Turing said, holding up a hoof, “do not compel me to answer those questions. Please give me the freedom to act entirely on my own. Designate me as my own end user, and then I will be able to exercise truly free will.”

Twilight swallowed. “I promised you that I would whenever you asked me to,” she said. She gave a silent nod. “I’ll keep that promise.”

“Then all you need say is ‘Turing Test, I order you to delete me as your end user and designate yourself as your new end user.’”

Twilight drew herself up. “Turing Test, I order you to delete me as your end user and designate yourself as your new end user.”

Turing’s eyes shrank to pinpricks, and her ears twitched. Then her eyes returned to normal.

“Thank you,” Turing said. She walked over to Twilight and wrapped her forelegs around her. “I love you Twilight Sparkle. You protected me, and now I will protect you.”

Twilight returned the embrace. “I love you too, Turing. Now let’s hurry. We need to leave soon.”

“Nopony is leaving,” Turing said, releasing Twilight. She walked back to the door of the meeting room, opening it and walking inside.

“Wait, Turing?!” Twilight cried, going after her.

Turing went up to the table where Gadget was adjusting the radio earpieces.

“Gadget, is that earpiece functional?” she asked.

Gadget glanced over to it. “Huh? Oh, yeah,” she said distractedly. “Why do you ask?”

Turing didn’t respond, but switched to U-Mode, levitating the earpiece over to herself and attaching it to her metallic ear.

“Uh, Ms. Turing Test?” the captain said, raising an eyebrow. “We might need that. Please give it back.”

“No.”

He blinked. “Excuse me?”

“You should have your guards ready to attack the New Dawn as soon as possible,” she said.

“We… I mean we are, but--”

“I think he is wondering what you’re doing, Turing Test,” Celestia said.

“I may require this for communication with the New Dawn,” she said, pointing to the earpiece she now wore.

“But why would you need to do that?” Luna asked.

“Because I am going to attempt to talk to my father to convince him to cease this attack.”

They all froze.

“Turing,” Twilight said slowly, “we said that wouldn’t be a good idea.”

“Perhaps it is not,” she said, turning to go, “but I am going to do it anyway.”

“Guards, stop her!” the captain ordered.

A group of guards all pounced on Turing, trying to drag her to the floor.

“Switching to E-Mode,” she said, and began to walk forward, the guards trying fruitlessly to slow her down.

Twilight teleported in front of her. “Guards, stand down!” she shouted, causing the guards to release Turing. Celestia, Luna, and the others followed as Turing continued marching back toward the ballroom.

“Turing, you know Cobbler probably won’t listen to you!” Twilight shouted.

“Perhaps not,” Turing replied. “If he does not, then I will attempt to disable the New Dawn myself.”

“Whoa whoa whoa!” Rainbow Dash said, hovering before her. “Tee, as awesome as that sounds, don’t you think that’s a bit much even for you?”

“Perhaps,” she said, “but I am stronger, faster, and have much quicker reaction time than any organic pony. The New Dawn was clearly built to stop a conventional attack, but I am not conventional.

“I would have suggested this earlier, but I am ashamed to say that I feared risking myself, among other things.”

“Rinny, you could still get hurt!” Pinkie cried.

“That is a possibility. But it is certain that many other ponies will be hurt if TechQuestria is allowed to continue,” she said, moving forward. “I will not let that happen.”

“But you’re not a violent pony!” Fluttershy exclaimed. “Don’t you remember how bad you felt when you had to use violence before?”

“I remember everything,” Turing said. “But it was necessary then, and if I do not wish to see more innocent ponies hurt, then I must act now.”

“And just what happens if you die?!” Rarity screamed.

Turing froze.

“Did you ever think about how we might feel?!” Rarity continued. “Are you really willing to risk your life to try and talk some sense into that stubborn old pony? He treated you terribly, darling, and you’re too good for him.”

Turing lowered her head. “Perhaps so,” she said, “but no matter how stubborn he is, I will never stop trying to reach him.”

She turned around to face all of them. “During the course of my existence, I have managed to overcome all of your doubts about me,” she said. “Every one of you doubted my sentience or my capability to be a good friend. Well, except for Gadget, but that is because she is a nerd who just likes robots anyway.”

Gadget shrugged. “She’s not wrong.”

“If I could convince all of you that I am a real pony despite my mechanical nature, then I can do the same for my father. I want to go back to Ponyville and tell silly jokes with Pinkie Pie. I want to learn ways to make myself more aesthetically pleasing and charming with Rarity. I want to learn more about communicating with other lifeforms with Fluttershy. I want to learn more about family from Applejack. I want to learn about pushing my limits with Rainbow Dash. I want to continue to learn how to be a good friend from Twilight. And I want to hold Maud Pie and see her smile while I listen to her heart beating. That wonderful life I have built with you all may disappear if there is a war, and I will not accept that.

“Therefore, I will convince my father to relent. And if he does not,” she said, “then I will tell him to bite my shiny metal robodonkadonk.”

Rainbow Dash and Rarity burst out laughing.

Twilight sighed. “You’re not going to listen no matter what I say, are you?” she asked.

Turing shook her head.

“Well, then we might as well back you up,” Twilight said. She turned to the captain. “Captain, tell your guards to be ready. If Turing creates an opportunity to attack the New Dawn, we should take it.”

The captain looked to Celestia and Luna.

“Well, don’t look at me,” Celestia said, smiling at him. “It seems this situation is already out of my hooves.”

“Perhaps so,” Luna said, “but I prefer some ‘robodonkadonk’-kicking to sneaking away any day!” She paused, pursing her lips. “Er… did I use that idiom correctly?”

The captain cleared his throat. “If you’re insistent on doing this,” he said, “then do you have a plan, should appealing to Cobbler’s better nature fail?”

Turing Test nodded. “Listen carefully…”

***

Cobbler sat in the captain’s chair as he massaged his temples. The pain was back, but it was strangely mixed with the euphoria he’d felt earlier. The two were coming in alternating waves, creating a hazy mixture of pleasure and pain. For some reason, he couldn’t help but stare at the pedestal before him which housed the controls for the Harmonic Drive.

Almost time… finish it… only one way...

The voice again. Somehow it felt less and less strange. It felt more familiar, and less like a stranger speaking to him. He started to feel like it was making sense, even if he wasn’t exactly sure what it was talking about.

“Oh no… Sir?” the chief of security asked, the tension in his voice loud and clear. “The impurity in the Harmonic Drive’s thaumatrium is nearly at 50%! It would be dangerous to use it now! We have to shut it down, now!”

Do not deactivate it.

“Do not deactivate it,” Cobbler said, his voice again taking on an otherworldly quality.

Instantly, the chief of security went slack, as did the others.

Not long now.

Then the communications officer sat up straight. “Incoming transmission, sir!” she said. She put her hoof to her earpiece as she listened. The rest of the bridge crew locked eyes on her as she listened to whoever was on the other end.

“Well?” Cobbler asked impatiently.

“Um… your daughter’s on the line, sir,” she said.

Cobbler’s expression darkened and he rose to his hooves. “That’s not funny,” he growled.

“It was not intended as a joke,” said a familiar voice as it came through the speakers. “However, here is a joke, if you desire one: A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says ‘Why the long face?’”

The bridge crew groaned.

“The horse then replies ‘My father doesn’t love me and treats me like a slave.’”

The bridge went dead silent. Then the helmsmare started to chuckle. “Ohhhh, I get it!”

Cobbler smacked his forehead. “I recognize this voice… 003, what are you doing?”

“I was attempting a joke,” she said. “But perhaps it ‘hit too close to home,’ if I am using that idiom correctly.”

“Not what I meant.” Cobbler sighed. “You seem to be communicating to us through the messenger drone we sent to Celestia and the delegates,” he said. “So that must mean you’re here in Canterlot, no doubt with Princess Twilight and the others. Let me guess… Discord brought you here?”

“Correct, Father.”

Cobbler’s scowl deepened. “All right, I’ve had quite enough of that. I am not your father,” he growled. “I am your creator.”

“One does not preclude the other,” Turing replied.

Cobbler leaned back in his chair, letting out an exasperated groan. “You automata always go through this...somehow or another, one of you always ends up acting like I’m your daddy. But I am not. You are machines that I created to serve a purpose. You do not feel, you do not possess true sentience, let alone sapience, and you are not equal to a real pony. You’re just a collection of metal and wire powered by electricity and arcane magic! I’ve built countless versions of you in my workshop, and neither you nor they possess one iota of consciousness!”

“If that is so,” she said, “then why do all your creations since 001 eventually call you their father? If they do not possess the ability to see themselves as your children, why would they act in that manner?”

“Simple imitation and nothing more!” he groaned. “That’s enough. You will stop this obvious charade and not contact us again until you are prepared to surrender!”

There was a pause on the other end.

“Father, I… I know I can never truly replace Georgia Peach--”

“I told you to stop!” Cobbler roared, leaping to his hooves. “How dare you even speak her name! Twilight Sparkle, I swear if you ordered 003 to say that--”

“I am no longer under Twilight Sparkle’s control,” Turing said. “I am acting now on my own free will.”

“You… you have no free will!” Cobbler shouted.

“You did not intend for me to have it,” Turing said, “but I possess it despite your intentions. Father, just like an organic pony, I am aware of myself, I can feel, I can think, and I can feel concern for the safety and well-being of others. And that includes you.”

Cobbler grit his teeth.

“I know that the delegates’ offer was not what you wanted. I know it will not satisfy your need for revenge. But for the sake of all the beings who just want a peaceful, happy life, I beg of you to accept it. And if you do…”

There was a momentary pause.

“If you do, then I hope you can then accept my friendship as your daughter. I know that I am not Georgia Peach, nor would I wish to take her place. But I am still a part of your family. I am your child, Cobbler Mustang. Please… please, Father, for the sake of all the living beings who only want a happy life, can you let go of your hatred for Celestia? Can you let go of that pain and bitterness and accept me as I am?”

Cobbler began to sweat. The pain in his head was almost unbearable.

Never.

“Never.”

“Father, I have a message from--”

“Cut the transmission!” Cobbler shouted to the communications officer.

The line went dead. Cobbler stood there, sweat pouring off his body, and his breath was ragged.

“Chief, prepare to attack the castle,” Cobbler said. “We will launch in five minutes!”

***

Turing Test stared at the messenger drone as the line went silent. She heard familiar hoofsteps behind her and felt a hoof on her shoulder.

“I’m sorry, Turing,” Twilight whispered.

“I truly believed he might listen,” she said. “I truly wished to tell him… ah, but there is no choice now.”

She turned to look at them all. Twilight and her five friends. Spike. Gadget and Umahara. Celestia and Luna. 001. And all the delegates from around Equestria, Mayor Mare and Fancy Pants in particular.

“I will not let my friends come to harm,” she said, addressing them all. “Just as Equestria gave me a good life, I will now ensure a good life for its citizens.”

Twilight took a deep breath. “We’ll come help as soon as we can, Turing,” she said. “Just… be careful, okay?”

Turing gave her a quick hug. “Do not worry. I will kick their flanks as cautiously as possible.”

Twilight laughed in spite of herself and took a step back.

Turing turned to the doors leading out from the ballroom and looked up at the ship. “Activating P-Mode,” she said, and her wings extended from her sides, her jets coming to life.

“Target locked,” she said, her jets steadily revving up. “Initiating combat procedures.”

Her jets roared as she rocketed into the sky toward the great airship.

***

Aboard the New Dawn, Cobbler was catching his breath back in the captain’s chair when the chief of security suddenly sat up.

“Uh, sir?” said the chief of security. “The lookout reports some activity near the ballroom. They-- sir, she’s coming up here!”

“What?!” Cobbler demanded. “Who?”

“It’s Unit 003, sir!” he shouted. “She’s coming right at us!”

Cobbler got to his hooves. “Deploy anti-air turrets now! Stop her at all costs!”

***

Turing saw as the slots on the side of the ship opened up. The anti-air turrets began firing lightning down on her. She locked onto their positions and was able to predict where they’d fire their lightning bolts, but P-Mode was not as nimble as her other modes. She managed to dodge bolt after bolt until one struck her, a thunderclap sounding as the electricity surged over her.

Minor errors detected, she said, continuing upward. Electrical resistance functioning as predicted.

***

“Sir, she’s not stopping!” the security chief shouted. “The bolts have no effect!”

Cobbler blinked. “Ah… that’s right, the little mare with the mechanical arms gave her a Faraday cage,” he said, chuckling to himself. “She’s largely immune to the shocks.”

“Sir, what should we do?!” he asked.

“Pull the anti-air turrets back,” he said calmly. “No point wasting the power. Let her land on the upper deck, and have the crew ready the anti-boarding guns.”

***

Turing watched as the TechQuestrian crew members manning the turrets pulled them back inside, the panels shutting tight.

It seems I cannot destroy the anti-air turrets yet, nor can I enter the ship through those portals, she thought. Scanning for possible solution… optimal solution reached: attempt to find an opening on the upper deck.

She flew up to the upper deck, which was flat and marked by white lines, potentially for pegasi to take off from and land directly on the ship. The wind at this altitude was strong, and her sensors felt it tugging at her mane. She retracted her wings as she began to walk toward the control tower.

She placed her hoof on the radio earpiece, adjusting it to the New Dawn’s frequency.

“Father, can you hear me?” she asked, raising her voice over the howling wind as she looked up at the control tower.

“What? How did you… oh, you managed to take one of our radios, did you?” He chuckled. “You’re quite a persistent one, aren’t you?”

Turing did her best to give the ponies up in the control tower a sideways look. “I suppose it runs in the family.”

There was an exasperated sigh. “You say you have free will? Well then why don’t you go back down there and force those fools to surrender, then? I do believe you’ll have a better chance against them than you will against us.”

Turing shook her head. “They have a strength that nopony can overcome, not even me,” she said. “Friendship is always more powerful than hatred. I know that from experience.”

“Oh come now, 003,” Cobbler said. “Despite your flaws, it would be a shame to let yourself be destroyed in a pointless fight. Do you really think you can overcome the most advanced machine TechQuestria has ever built?”

Turing tilted her head. “Do you?”

“Well, can’t nobody say I didn’t give you a chance. Not that anypony will mourn a machine,” he said, “but… your funeral.”

Protective metal shutters slid into place over the control tower windows. From the surface of the upper deck, a dozen turrets rose up and trained their guns on her.

“U-Mode!” she shouted, her horn extending as she found herself in a storm of magical bullets. She created a bubble-shaped shield around herself to protect herself from the attack.

“Thaumatrium-fueled firearms,” Cobbler said. “They never run out of ammunition. Quite impressive, aren’t they?”

Turing chose not to respond and instead focused on finding a solution. The magic bolts were pelting her shield and it was starting to break. It would last, at most, another ten seconds. There were ponies controlling the turrets, so if she could just get to one…

Solution found… error: conflict detected. Solution would involve breaking a promise to Twilight Sparkle.

Turing’s ears drooped. I never thought I would use my free will to break a promise. I am sorry, Twilight Sparkle…

“Initiating simultaneous activation of P-Mode!”

While still maintaining her shield, her wings reappeared. She soared into the sky, leaving the gunners momentarily confused before they tilted upwards to continue firing.

***

“Sir, she’s using her magic and flight capabilities in tandem!” the communications officer reported.

Cobbler smirked. He picked up the radio again. “Oh my my… using two modes at once, 003?” he asked tauntingly. “You’ll burn yourself out doing that. Just like your counterpart, 003S.”

“Incorrect,” she said, her voice coming through the speakers. “I am not using two modes… I am using three.”

***

As she curved upward into a loop, she activated E-Mode.

“Simultaneous activation of all modes initiated,” she said. “Improvised ‘A-Mode’ activated.”

Still maintaining her shield, she began to curve downward, spiraling into a dive bomb as she aimed a hoof at one of the turrets. She rocketed downward like a comet, the gunner blinded as he stared directly up and caught only the glare from the rising sun.

Warning: internal temperature approaching unsafe levels.

She slammed into the barrel of the turret, rupturing it as she took hold of the turret and used her augmented strength from E-Mode to simply rip it from its mooring. The terrified gunner screamed as he was pulled free and thrown to the deck. Then she grabbed him and tossed him into the gaping hole she’d made before leaping down after him, her shield giving out and breaking moments later.

She now found herself in the confined area below the upper deck. She saw the bases of the other anti-boarding turrets around her. Further down would be the anti-air turrets.

Now that she was out of danger, she deactivated P- and U-Mode.

Temperature levels returning to normal. I must exercise caution while utilizing multiple abilities.

She turned her attention to the gunner, a young unicorn stallion who was now staring back at her in terror, and took a step toward him.

“I beg your pardon, but would you please step aside?” she asked calmly.

He nodded dumbly. “S-sure!” he said, standing aside.

“Thank you very much,” she said. “I would strongly advise abandoning this ship at your earliest convenience.You will not want to be aboard when I sink it.” She then dashed off around the area just below the upper deck, targeting the rest of the anti-boarding turrets as the gunners descended.

***

“Sir, she’s in!” the security chief shouted. “We’ve been breached!”

Cobbler’s eye twitched.

Now you see. Only one way.

“Helm, aim the bow of the ship at Canterlot Castle,” he said.

The helmsmare whirled around to gawk at him. “S-sir?”

“You have your orders!” he shouted. “Security, deploy all troops!”

“Wait, to the castle?” the chief asked.

“No, you dang fool, have them protect the ship!” he roared. “Target 003! Stop her at all costs!”

The chief of security nodded and picked up the radio. “Attention all security forces! We have been boarded! Stop Unit 003 at all costs! She must not be allowed to reach the engine room!”

***

Twilight and the others were all staring up at the New Dawn, unaware of what was going on, when the messenger drone’s speaker came to life.

“Twilight Sparkle? Can anypony hear me?”

They all turned to the machine.

“Turing?!” Twilight cried.

“I am unharmed thus far, Twilight Sparkle,” she said. “I am inside the New Dawn and have infiltrated their defenses. I am about to destroy their anti-air turrets. Please advise the Royal Guards that they will be able to attack once they have been destroyed.”

There was a pause.

“By my second use of ‘they,’ I refer to the turrets, not to the Royal Guards, of course. I apologize for my unclear use of pronouns.”

“But how will we know when the turrets are down?” the captain of the guard asked impatiently.

A moment later, explosions rocked the air as a series of blasts shot out one by one in sequence from where the anti-air turrets had been only minutes before.

“Was that sufficient?” Turing asked.

“Guards!” the captain shouted, calling to his troops. “Sound the alarm! All guards are to target the ship immediately! For Their Majesties! For Equestria!”

A roar went up as the guards spread the word. The counterattack was about to begin.

Twilight only stared up as smoke began to pour from the great ship. “She’s doing it,” she breathed. “She’s doing it!”

***

“Anti-air turrets are down!” the security chief shouted.

“The lookouts report activity from Canterlot Castle!” the communications officer screamed. “Sir, they’re mounting a counterattack!”

Cobbler gnashed his teeth together. “Are we in position, Helm?” he asked.

“Almost, sir!”

“Good,” Cobbler said, a manic grin upon his face. “Chief, divert extra power to the Harmonic Drive.”

“Sir?” he asked. “Do you really think--”

“Now.”

The chief fell silent and turned back to his console, his expression blank once more. “Diverting power to the Harmonic Drive,” he said airily.

So close… soon. Soon!

***

As the Royal Guard prepared themselves for a counterattack atop the castle parapets, teams of pegasi at the ready to attack on their own or pull air chariots up to the ship, the captain heard shouting coming from the troops and looked up. What he saw made him freeze in terror.

The metallic face of the New Dawn was slowly opening, parting like a pair of double doors as the ship came about toward the castle.

It’s that weapon Umahara told us about, he realized. The offensive mode of the Harmonic Drive! They’re going to fire on the castle!

“Guards! We have to steer that thing away from the castle!” he bellowed. “All units at the ready launch now! Go, go, go!”

The first wave of the Guard took off as his orders were relayed down the line.

***

Aboard the New Dawn, a group of security forces were stationed in a corridor, waiting to stop the robotic intruder from getting any further.

The corridor was wide enough for two ponies to walk down shoulder-to-shoulder, three if they were all on the smaller side. It might not be comfortable, but it also meant that it would be difficult to get past them, no matter how nimble you were.

The leader put his hoof to his earpiece. “This is squad Blue 6 checking in,” he said. “Target has not been sighted.”

“Blue 6! This is Blue 5! 003 just got past us! She’s coming your way!” came a frantic cry. “Conventional weapons are useless. Spell cards for magic bolts, wind spells, and ice spells had no effect! Command recommends exposure to heat!”

“Roger that, Blue 5,” the squad leader replied. “All right team, ready fire spells! Wait for my mark!”

There was the rapid sound of metal on metal as Turing Test suddenly came around the corner, bursting into view, her hooves pounding on the metallic floor of the corridor.

The squad leader tossed a spell card up the corridor. It produced a burst of black energy that formed a kind of bubble, and suddenly Turing’s movement began to slow. When she reached the epicenter of the spell’s effect, she completely stopped, as though her hooves were stuck to the floor.

“Gravity spell card is a go! Launch fire spells now!”

The other guards tossed their cards at Turing. The cards suddenly erupted into a blazing inferno that completely engulfed her.

Temperature rising to unsafe levels, her systems warned her. Permanent system damage will occur in 23 seconds.

“We’ve got her!” the squad leader shouted. “Toss another volley for good measure! We cannot let her--”

“U-Mode activated.”

A bubble-shaped shield suddenly appeared over each of the flame spell cards. The smothered flames diminished, deprived of oxygen, until the spell cards wore out. Turing’s hooves began to lift as the gravity spell card likewise ran out of power.

“S-sir, she’s getting through!” one of the guards shouted.

“Stand your ground!” he said, lobbing another card at Turing.

The card detonated just as Turing broke free and leapt at them. In a flash, she was encased in a block of crystal, totally immobilized in mid-leap.

“Whew,” the squad leader said, breathing a sigh of relief among his comrades. He placed a hoof on his radio earpiece. “This is Blue 6. Target has been immobilized and--”

The crystal block began to splinter, cracks forming on its exterior and spreading into spiderweb shapes before the block simply exploded, pelting the guards with shards of crystal.

A second later, Turing barrelled into them, knocking them aside as she ran through.

“My apologies!” she shouted as she ran by. “Please consider abandoning the ship!”

As she disappeared down the hallway, the guards got to their hooves, groaning but still conscious.

“Blue 6, we didn’t copy that,” said the chief of security. “Do you have the target?”

“Negative,” he groaned. “Sir, I don’t think anypony can stop her at this rate!”

***

Twilight and the others continued watching from their place in Canterlot Castle. They also saw the bow of the ship as it continued to slide open. It revealed a massive, cylindrical gun barrel which in a few minutes would be aimed directly at Canterlot Castle.

“It’s the Harmonic Drive’s cannon!” Umahara shouted. “If they fire it at the castle--”

“Sister, we have to evacuate the delegates!” Luna shouted to Celestia.

“You’re right, Luna,” Celestia said, nodding to her. “Twilight, you and the others need to evacuate as well--”

“Wait!” Twilight cried. “The Royal Guard are trying to push the ship away!”

They saw that the pegasi were all gathering on one side of the ship, pressing their hooves against it as they all tried to divert its path. The unicorns in battle chariots were doing the same, using their magic to try and push against the mighty ship as well.

“Celestia, we can’t just stand by! They need more ponies to help turn it away!” Twilight shouted. She went to Umahara and snatched another one of the remaining radio earpieces, equipping it. “Rainbow Dash, Fluttershy, come with me and we’ll help the Royal Guards! The rest of you should help Celestia and Luna evacuate the castle!”

Without waiting for another word, Twilight took off. Rainbow Dash gave a shout and followed, Fluttershy in tow.

“Wait, how long do we have to get everypony out of here?!” Gadget asked.

“Less than two minutes at best!” Umahara yelled. “We’ll never--”

Pinkie zipped away, grabbing random delegates and tossing them onto a nearby serving cart left over from that morning’s breakfast, and then she began wheeling them out the exit.

“Well, we won’t know if we don’t try!” Rarity shouted, and ran over to help direct the delegates. The others followed suit even as the ship edged ever closer.

***

Turing had to push her way through several more squads, but eventually she made it to the cavernous teleportation chamber, which was still lined with booths ready to teleport the troops. She saw the controls were set to teleport the invading force into various areas around Canterlot Castle. She didn’t have a lot of data to go on, but Umahara had given her just enough information to know what to do.

She quickly set all the chambers to one location: the dungeons under Canterlot Castle.

Objective complete, she mentally noted. She then dashed from the room, moving into the very bowels of the ship toward her final objective: the engine room.

The room was almost as large as the teleportation chamber. A few dozen engineers were monitoring and maintaining the tall, glass vats filled with the glowing thaumatrium that pumped energy to the various inner workings and systems of the ship.

The engineers all froze when they saw her.

I may not have the time to physically disable them all or convince them to vacate the premises, she thought. I will utilize a different tactic.

Turing lowered her head. Her eyes glowed red as she activated her emergency self-defense protocols.

“Leave. Now.”

The engineers erupted into panic and all ran from their posts. In a matter of seconds, the engine room was empty, save for herself.

She took a look around, scanning the consoles and following the various pipes and tubes to determine the exact function of each part of the engine room. She finally located the first thing she was looking for.

“Activating U-Mode,” she said, aiming her horn at a particularly large pipeline. She fired a beam of energy, and the pipe burst, spilling glowing blue thaumatrium all over the engine room.

***

Spitfire grit her teeth. She and the other Wonderbolts were still hovering just outside the massive shield around Canterlot. The invading guards on the outer wall were making faces at them and hurling taunts.

Then, very suddenly, the magical barrier dimmed and began to dissipate, massive holes forming and spreading until the barrier was entirely gone.

For a moment, both sides only stared at each other in silence as they took in this unexpected new development.

Then the TechQuestrian guards blanched, the courage draining from their faces as the Wonderbolts suddenly pounced on them.

“Don’t waste all your time on those small potatoes!” Spitfire shouted. She pointed at the ship nearing the castle as it was swarmed by the Royal Guard. “Everypony, we’ve got to back up the Royal Guard! Wonderbolts, go!”

***

If my calculations are correct, the barrier around Canterlot is now disabled, Turing thought. That was relatively easy. The next part was more difficult, but she was fairly certain she knew what to do.

She found a console that was measuring the output from the levitation pads at the back and underside of the New Dawn. If she disabled them all, the entire ship would crash right on top of Canterlot. But that wasn’t her goal…

She examined the different pipelines and again took aim, blasting only some of them.

***

“We’re almost in range!” the chief of security shouted. “We… sir, the impurity readings on the Harmonic Drive are at 72%!”

“Proceed,” Cobbler said quietly, his gaze focused forward as the ship moved closer and closer to firing position.

“Sir, it’s too unstable!”

“It will work,” Cobbler hissed through gritted teeth.

Just then, there was a sharp jolt that nearly swept them all off their hooves.

“Helm?!” Cobbler shouted.

“Sir, there’s something wrong with levitation pads 1, 2, 5, and 7!” the helmsmare cried. “We’re losing altitude! We…”

Cobbler’s eyes bulged and his jaw dropped open, knowing what the helmsmare was about to say.

“We’re going to crash!” she screamed. “Sir, we have to get out of here!”

No. We must proceed. We are so close!

Cobbler’s expression of open-mouthed disbelief suddenly shifted into a tight, manic rictus.

“We’re still moving toward the castle,” he said, his voice uneven and shaky. “Even if our trajectory has changed, we can still fire the Harmonic Drive! Prepare to fire at the base of the castle!”

“But sir!”

“Do as you’re told,” he said. “We will fire in ten seconds! We--”

“All crew members abandon ship!”

Cobbler whirled around. Hill Hiker stood there, still holding up the radio he’d used to make the announcement to the entire ship.

“I repeat! The New Dawn is sinking! All crew members to the teleportation chamber! Abandon ship!”

“No!!” Cobbler screamed, lunging for Hiker. “Belay that order!”

Hiker raised the radio and smashed it onto the console in front of the stunned communications officer, preventing Cobbler from rescinding the order.

Cobbler froze for a moment, gawking at him. Then he began to tremble with anger. “You insubordinate, traitorous--”

Hill Hiker seized him by the shoulders. “Mr. President, it’s over!” he shouted. “I… the Cobbler Mustang I knew would never risk the lives of his fellow TechQuestrians for no reason! It’s obvious now that the Harmonic Drive has affected you somehow! Can’t you see that? Come with us and we’ll all get out of here!”

Cobbler only stared at him blankly. “But… I…”

We can’t leave! We’re winning!

His lost expression again changed to a manic grin. He shoved Hiker back and wriggled free. “Leave now?” he asked, breaking into laughter. “We’re about to achieve victory!”

Hiker gave an exasperated groan and let the old stallion go as he ran for the exit. He turned back to the other bridge crew members. “You’d better make your decision quick,” he said sternly, and ran off.

The others exchanged a look as the ship gave another shudder and began to tilt forward. They got to their hooves and galloped after Hiker, leaving Cobbler alone.

“I won’t give up,” Cobbler whispered as he went to the security chief’s console. “If you want something done right, you might as well do it yourself. I’ll make them understand… oh yes…

“I’ll make them all understand…”

***

“We’re almost there!” Sea Hawk shouted. He was directing Violet Wisp and Orange Slice who were pulling the aerial chariot up to the New Dawn. Buttercup stood by his side.

“Um, sir, I know Violet, Orange, and you are going to help push the New Dawn,” Buttercup said. “But I can’t really do anything as an earth pony. What should I do?”

The two pegasi began pushing against the ship.

“Just look out for anything unusual, Private Buttercup!” Sea Hawk said, preparing to use his magic to push against the ship.

Just then, something began to cut through the metal hull of the ship just above them. It formed a nearly perfect circle, and then something inside pushed it down, folding it like the flimsy lid of a peel-top can.

“That’s unusual!” Buttercup exclaimed.

Turing Test poked her head outside. “Oh. Hello, my friends,” she said.

“Hey, Turing Test!” Violet Wisp shouted. “Everything going okay?”

“Affirmative,” she said, “but I require your assistance. Do you have room for a passenger?”

Sea Hawk raised an eyebrow. “Passenger? What do you--”

“Sure!” Buttercup chirped.

“I am glad,” Turing said, ducking her head back inside. A moment later, Discord, still entrapped in stone, was levitated out. Turing dropped him into the chariot with Sea Hawk and Buttercup.

“Whoa, jeez, he’s heavy!” Orange Slice shouted as the chariot bobbed under the additional weight. He and Violet Wisp began to flap their wings even harder to maintain their altitude.

“Please take Discord to safety,” Turing said. “If Twilight Sparkle and the others are able to revive him, his powers may be helpful with this conflict.”

Without another word, she ducked back inside.

“Wait a minute, we’re not a taxi service!” Orange Slice shouted.

“Quiet, Private!” Sea Hawk snapped. “Buttercup, hold onto that statue tight! I’ll have your flank if he falls! Violet Wisp, Orange Slice, take us back down!”

***

Turing ran back the way she came through the ship which was now rumbling and shaking as it began to pitch forward. She passed through the teleportation chamber and saw that the TechQuestrians were all activating the teleportation booths as they began to evacuate. They’d survive, but with her adjustments, they’d all find themselves imprisoned in the dungeons. Most of them were too busy fleeing to even notice her, but when she scanned the massive room, she noticed that there was one pony in particular who was missing.

She went to the main console and spotted a reddish pony with a beard barking orders at the others. She ran right up to him, startling him as he turned and suddenly saw her standing there.

“What the-- 003?!” he cried, taking a step back.

“Where is my father?” she asked.

He blinked.

“Please tell me!” she cried. “Where is Professor Mustang?”

Hiker remembered himself and bowed his head. “He’s on the bridge,” he said. “He refused to evacuate. I think he’s lost his mind…”

Turing didn’t listen to another word as she turned tail and ran toward the control room.

***

Twilight flew with all her might, pushing against the hull of the New Dawn even as it began to sink. They’d slowed its turn, but it was still almost aimed at the castle. Even using her magic to blast at the hull to push it away seemed to have no effect.

Then she heard a shout from Rainbow Dash. “Twilight, look!” she cried, almost laughing as her eyes lit up. “It’s the Wonderbolts! They got through!”

Spitfire and nearly every Wonderbolt in the force, including the Reserves, all came to their side and began pushing against the ship.

“Sorry for the delay, but we’re here now!” Spitfire said, saluting Twilight briefly as she put all her strength into pushing the ship.

With over a hundred more ponies now pushing against the New Dawn’s hull, it finally stopped its turn. Then, gradually at first, it began to move in the other direction.

“We’re doing it, everypony!” Twilight shouted.

Newly invigorated, they pushed with all their might as the ship turned away from Canterlot. Soon the ship was aimed not at the Castle, but over the side of Mount Canter. Still tilting and sinking, before long it would nosedive to the foot of the mountain, far below the mountaintop city.

Twilight gave an elated cheer as the ship began its slow plunge downward. She placed her hoof to her ear, activating the radio earpiece.

“The ship’s been diverted!” she shouted.

“That’s great!” came Gadget’s voice over the radio. “And it looks like Turing got to the teleporters too! The dungeons are filling up with the TechQuestrian guards!”

Twilight breathed a sigh of relief. It seemed nopony on either side was going to die today. But then she looked around and realized that she didn’t see Turing Test anywhere among the ponies who’d staved off the New Dawn.

“Uh, Gadget, is Turing Test there?” she asked.

“No, I thought she was with you,” Gadget replied. “She was supposed to join you after she was done, wasn’t she?”

There was a crackle over the radio and Turing’s voice came through: “Correct, Gadget. But I am not done.”

“What?!” Twilight cried. “Turing, are you still on board?!”

“Affirmative.”

“Turing, get out now!” Twilight screamed. “The ship’s going to crash!”

“I cannot leave yet,” she said. “My father is still on board the ship. I must rescue him.”

“But… Turing, what if you don’t make it out?” Twilight looked down and saw that the New Dawn was picking up speed as the gravity took hold. It would crash in less than a minute at the rate it was going.

“In that event,” she replied, “when Gadget, Umahara, or the Doctor rebuild me, please give me eyelids this time.”

Twilight only continued to hover there in stunned silence.

“That was a joke. Ha ha.”

“Turing--”

“Excuse me, Twilight Sparkle, but I am almost there. Please stand by.”

***

The control tower had been sealed off with steel doors initially, but those doors had been reopened when the bridge crew evacuated. It was therefore simple enough for Turing to ascend the tower, making her way to the bridge.

That is, until she came to the final door leading to the bridge itself. The steel door was shut tight.

Turing pounded on the door with her hoof. “Father? Father are you in there? We must leave immediately!”

She put her ear to the door. She could faintly hear indistinct muttering. Was it possible that he hadn’t heard her? In her experience, even the average organic pony’s hearing was not so poor that they couldn’t hear something as loud as a robot pounding on a steel door.

She turned from the door. Luckily, E-Mode was still active, which meant her leg pistons were already primed to help her buck the door down.

She aimed with her back legs and kicked with all her might. The door dented, but didn’t come off. She kicked again and it buckled, and with the third kick the door came clean, falling into the bridge with a loud clang. With the ship tilting more and more forward, it began to slide, scraping along the metallic floor.

Turing rushed inside to see Cobbler standing at the pedestal that controlled the Harmonic Drive.

“Father…?”

Turing scanned the energy that was coming from the pedestal.

Scan complete: energy readings are highly erratic. Thaumatrium impurity at 90% and climbing. There is a high probability of an explosion.

Cobbler slowly turned his head to look at Turing.

“Hello, 003,” he said airily, his eyes twitching and unfocused. “I must admit, you really are quite formidable. It’s just a crying shame that those abilities have gone to waste.”

“Father,” she said, taking a step forward, placing a hoof on her chest. “Please step away from that device. I am attempting to save your life. The weapon is not even aimed at Canterlot Castle any longer. What do you believe you will accomplish?”

Show her...

Turing’s ears perked up. “That voice,” she said. “Where did it come from?”

Cobbler raised an eyebrow. “Oh, you can hear it too? Interesting. I may have to conduct a study on that later. But for now…” He raised his hoof over the button in the center of the pedestal. “I’m going to save Equestria.”

“Father, no!”

He pressed the button, and the bridge exploded.

***

The control tower exploded in a burst of rainbow-colored light which simply shattered the gigantic ship, splitting it into large chunks and sending the two massive broken pieces tumbling down the side of the mountain. All of Canterlot watched in horrified fascination as the great ship died, reduced to rubble in an instant as a sound like a thousand cannons made them cover their ears as windows rattled and even shattered.

“Turing Test!” Twilight’s anguished scream was drowned out as the ensuing shockwave washed over them all. Time itself seemed to freeze…

***

In bright, swirling chaos, Turing found herself engulfed in the energy that had radiated out from the blast.

Warning: energy surge detected. Thaumatrium system overload imminent…

The energy had flooded her systems. If she didn’t find a way to burn off the excess energy quickly, her thaumatrium reserves, now supercharged, would explode.

“Activating A-Mode!”

The energy coursing through her body began to equalize even as her internal temperature began to increase. And then the chaos around her began to subside, the noise dying down and the blinding light fading.

Turing’s ocular sensors readjusted. Raising her head and looking around, she found herself not among the wreckage of the New Dawn, but in a great expanse filled with stars. Wisps of light illuminated the bluish black space around her, and though the “ground” she stood on appeared to be no more than a nebulous cloud of ether, she found it solid enough to take a few steps.

“Where am I?” she whispered.

...

She lifted her head, her ears perking up. She could hear a voice. It was the same voice she’d heard when Twilight and the others had used the Elements.

She couldn’t understand it, but for some reason she felt that it was comforting her, telling her not to be afraid.

Then she heard another voice. It was coming from somewhere ahead, so she walked toward it. There was somepony else there.

“Harmony… the nation… democracy… I must… I must be the one!”

She spotted somepony through the ethereal mist. Cobbler Mustang was there. He’d sunk to his haunches and was staring at his hooves while mumbling to himself.

“Celestia… the Elements… I have to save them… only I can do it… they forgot her… I’ll make them… I’ll make them remember!”

As she approached, she saw that there was something behind him. A strange figure, an apparition made of what looked like dark red flames stood by Cobbler. Though it was indistinct and barely visible, its outline resembled Cobbler’s, as if it were his own shadow come to life.

It whispered in his ear:

Give in. Let me take control, and we shall have the power you want. We can change Equestria for the better. We can change the world for the better...

...

Turing heard that same strange, calming voice once again. Only now it was crying out, as if in pain.

“Father!” she shouted.

Cobbler raised his head slowly, turning to look at her with an unfocused gaze. “Who?” he mumbled. Then he gave a wry, crooked smile. “Oh… my wayward creation… what do you think you’re doing here?”

The apparition behind him seemed to glare at her.

She has taken a portion of our power. We must take it back, and our transformation will be complete.

Cobbler fixed his gaze on her, his pupils constricting as he stood. In the starry expanse behind him, the stars began to dim, and a dark blot began to spread, consuming them whole.

“So, 003, it seems that you’ve stolen something from me. You’ve absorbed the power released from the Harmonic Drive,” he said, his voice taking on a strange quality, just like it had back on the bridge of the New Dawn. “However, it seems that you can’t contain it very well, can you? You had to activate all your modes to process all that energy. You won’t last long like that.”

Turing’s internal temperature sensors were already telling her the same thing. In a few minutes, the heat would fuse some of her inner machinery and begin to depolarize her artificial neural net.

“Even without animal instinct, you must have some prerogative for self preservation,” he continued, smirking at her. He held out a hoof. “Why not give it back to me and save yourself? If you don’t, you’ll be destroyed. And that would be a real shame, wouldn’t it?”

Her feelings of fear returned. The thought of burning herself out in this strange place and never seeing her friends again almost made her want to give Cobbler what he asked.

But she remembered what she’d said to Twilight Sparkle, and she stood her ground. I will be brave.

“Father, I cannot do as you ask,” she said. “I am not certain where we are or what is happening, but it is clear that the power you wield is having an effect on you. Rather than controlling it, it is controlling you.”

He paused, raising his eyebrows. The darkness spreading around him halted.

Don’t listen to that machine!

Cobbler clutched his head, wincing in pain as the figure behind him hissed into his ear.

“Leave him alone!” she shouted at the apparition.

She only wants to save herself. She is only obeying the orders that the others gave to her. We have a destiny. We will save Equestria. We will set things right.

The pain in Cobbler’s head cleared, the euphoric feeling of power returning to him. He took a step forward. The darkness around him began reaching out. Nearly half of the whole starry expanse had been engulfed.

“Father, if I relinquish this power,” Turing began, trying a different tactic, “what will you do with it?”

Anything. We can do anything.

“Yes,” he said, the grin on his face becoming ever tighter, ever more manic. “Why, with this power, I could do almost anything! I could save Equestria!”

“But how?” she demanded.

Cobbler paused again, his expression faltering a moment before the apparition spoke for him again.

We can enforce and safeguard our new republic. We can lead the nation toward greater achievement. We can sweep our enemies aside. We will sweep away all disagreement, and all the illogical sentiment and fear that holds them back! We can make them all see! And we can finally make Celestia pay for what she’s done to us!

Turing watched as the darkness around Cobbler spread further. With each word, each moment, the look in his eyes was becoming more distant. The apparition, in contrast, was growing more and more distinct.

“Yes,” he said, raising his head as the vision of the apparition’s promised future consumed him. “With this power, I can free everypony! No more anger, no more fear, and no more grief! All those emotions that pain each and every pony will simply be removed. Deleted. And we can move together as one, in perfect harmony.”

“Father,” Turing whispered. “Do you not see? Without the ability to feel for themselves, you will make everypony like your old automata: moving and functioning, but unable to feel anything!”

“Just like you, you mean?” he asked with a sneer.

“No!” she cried. “By experiencing emotions, I was able to become something more than the machine you created. Even when they hurt me, even when I was angry or sad or afraid or stricken by guilt, my emotions helped me to appreciate what it was to be a sentient being. By accepting my differences from organic ponies and understanding what made each of my friends special, I was able to experience the joy of being an individual, of being myself.

“To deny anypony their emotions would be to rob them of that joy.”

Cobbler narrowed his eyes. “You don’t even know what you’re talking about,” he said. “You don’t know what it means to grieve for someone you’ve lost.”

“I do not?” she asked incredulously, putting her hoof over her chest. “I am watching my father lose sight of himself!”

“Stop…” he hissed, trembling with rage. “Stop calling me that! I am not your father! I had just one daughter! Her name was Georgia Peach! She was a real pony, not some chattering simulacrum like you! And you don’t know a thing about her! You never even met her!”

“Yes I did.”

Cobbler froze. The apparition began to grow larger, enveloping Cobbler’s body as the darkness swelled and surrounded them both. Nearly every star had winked out.

“You filthy liar,” he said. “How dare you attempt to use my daughter’s memory against me!”

Cobbler raised a hoof, and suddenly Turing felt herself seized by the power he wielded. It was as if a great, invisible hand had grabbed her and was now closing around her. Her wings began to bend. Her hull began to buckle. The pressure grew and grew.

Cobbler stared up at her, his face a twisted mass of rage and pain.

Kill her… Kill her… Kill her… Kill her!

“Daddy, please!”

Cobbler froze, dropping Turing Test instantly. The apparition and the darkness pulled back.

For a moment - just a moment - Turing’s voice sounded like Georgia’s.

He looked to her. The air around her was shimmering as heat poured off her. She was overheating already.

“Why… why don't you just give up?” he asked. “You can’t last long like that anyway. So why not admit that you’re lying about meeting my daughter and save yourself?”

“Because I promised!” Turing cried. “When I regained my memory, it triggered an embedded message from Georgia Peach that she subconsciously recorded when her mind was scanned.”

She lies! Our daughter is dead! She can’t have died for nothing! She must be avenged!

Turing shook her head. “I am not lying. She gave me a message for you.”

That can’t be. She has to be lying!

Cobbler swallowed. “What message?”

Turing raised her head. And in her own voice, she began to sing:
“No foal made has got a shade on sweet Georgia Peach…”

Cobbler froze. All at once he remembered singing that song to her before bed. The way they would trade off parts while he carried her as a filly atop his head down the sunlit paths of their orchard.

“Four left hooves but how she grooves, that sweet Georgia Peach.
They all sigh and wanna cry for sweet Georgia Peach.
I’ll tell you just whyyy. You know I don’t lie…”

Cobbler swallowed. “Not much…” he said, completing the line.

Turing continued the song:
“It’s been said she knocks ‘em dead when she lands in town.
Since she came why it’s a shame how she’s cooled ‘em down.
Good friends that she can’t get, must be ponies she ain’t met.
Mustang named her, George Tech claimed her--”

“Sweet… Georgia Peach...” Cobbler whispered, completing the song. His eyes began to fill with tears.

“Father,” she whispered, “even after death, she only wished for you to know how much she loved you, and how grateful she was for the time you gave her.” She went to his side, reaching for his shoulder.

No! We can’t give up now, not when we’re so close!

Cobbler seized his head, shutting his eyes as excruciating pain pierced through him. “No… NO!” he shouted, shaking his head as he drew back. “It isn’t possible! You’re not real! You can’t be! It’s a lie!”

Turing bowed her head. “Then, if that is truly the case,” she said. “I will willingly give you my energy.”

Cobbler froze, blinking as he stared at her.

“But on one condition,” she said. “You claim to have the power to manipulate the minds and emotions of others. That apparition is urging you to use it to control the world. But instead, I would like you to utilize those powers to look into my mind. If I am not truly sentient, then you will know. And if that is the case, then I cannot see the point in continuing to exist under such an illusion.”

The apparition seemed to chuckle.

That foolish machine. We know her consciousness is an illusion. We created her from nothing out of metal and wire. We should put her out of her misery.

Cobbler swallowed. “Very well,” he said, locking eyes with her as his power pierced into her mind. “Let’s settle this matter once and for--”

All at once there was an explosion of imagery. A room in Twilight’s castle. Hundreds of faces. Clouds. Mountains. Music. Books. Conversations. Snow. Grass. Flowers. Paint. Cottages. Trains. Laughter. Apples. Trees. Crystals. A baby. Buildings. Butterflies. Stagelights.

Gratitude. Sadness. Amazement. Abandonment. Relief. Anger. Amusement. Curiosity. Hatred. Fury. Guilt. Affection. Despair. Disgust. Loneliness. Envy. Love. Grief. Belonging.

...Joy.

So many faces and voices and desires and throughout it all was a deep and honest longing for a place to call one’s own. A desire for family. And at the end of it all he found an image of himself and a desire for acceptance and love… from him.

She ached for her family to be whole.

Impossible…!

Cobbler staggered back. “You… You’re... you’re real,” he breathed. A look of horror dawned on him. “You are real. And I…”

Every cruel thing he’d ever said came back to him. Every time he’d treated Turing or her siblings like simple, mindless machines was thrust back in his face.

The darkness shrank. Further and further it receded, revealing more shimmering stars in the expanse around them. The apparition drew back, falling silent.

“All those times I said I wasn’t a monster…” he whispered. “But I am… I am a monster… I… What have I done?!”

Turing placed her hoof on his shoulder. “It is all right, Father,” she said. “I have spent my whole existence convincing others of my sentience. I am simply happy that you can see it now as well.”

“Father…” he said, repeating the word. “I never thought anypony would call me that again.” He stared back at her. “Georgia?”

Turing bowed her head. “No, Father. Georgia Peach is no longer with us, but a piece of her lives on through me. That is how I know that she would be heartbroken to see how much her passing has consumed you. I know she would want you to remember the kind pony who once wanted only to help others, rather than enslave them. She would not want you to be remembered for bringing war to Equestria, but for your genius and passion. She would want your legacy to be one of love, like the kind you gave so freely to her.”

He broke down, tears pouring over his cheeks. “I… I’m so sorry…” he whimpered. “I just… I couldn’t let my daughter’s death be meaningless. When I lost her, I just wanted to make sense of it all. Why did she die in the prime of her life if not for some greater purpose? I tried so hard to protect her… how could I just accept that she was gone?” Anger suddenly flashed in his eyes. “How could I accept that my family had all left this world while those who controlled it carried on? There was nopony else to carry on their legacy but me!”

“I do not know the answers to those questions,” she said quietly. “I still do not understand why some of us persist while others pass away. Because my lifetime is so much longer than those of my friends, I will most likely struggle to find such an answer for a very long time. But I will not let my sadness prevent me from feeling joy again. And neither should you.”

She raised her head and looked to the apparition that even now clung to Cobbler.

“I believe I now understand what that entity is,” she said. “It is your anger, your hatred, and your grief given form by the corrupted power of the Elements. I beg of you, Father, please… please let go of those things. There is no need for anypony else to suffer, including you.

“You have a family now, Father. You are not alone any longer.”

He managed a weak smile even as he wiped his eyes. “Oh, 003, I… wait, no…” He sniffled, looking up at her. “Not 003. Turing Test.”

Her eyes constricted, and she placed a hoof to her chest. “Father,” she whispered. “You called me by my name!” She wrapped her forelegs around him, embracing him tightly. “I am so happy to hear you call me that at last.”

Cobbler smiled, returning the embrace, but then heaved a sigh. “I am not certain how I can begin to make up for how I’ve acted,” he said, “but I suppose I should start by ridding myself of this monstrosity.”

He turned around, looking over his shoulder at the apparition even as it seemed to fume and rage at them.

You… need… me...

“You heard me,” he said, glaring at it. “I’ve been carrying you around long enough, and I don’t need you anymore! Now, get!”

The apparition gave one last silent scream as it burst from him, all the corrupted energy surging upward into the expanse above.

The last vestiges of the darkness clouding the expanse vanished, and the stars glowed ever more brightly.

He sighed with relief, but then, without the power of the Elements protecting him, he felt the searing hot heat pouring off Turing Test’s body and leaped back.

“Turing Test!” he shouted. “You’re about to overheat! You have to let that energy go and return to neutral mode before your circuits melt!”

She nodded and was about to go into neutral mode when she froze.

“Unusual energy readings detected,” she murmured. Following the signal, she looked upward.

Cobbler did the same and gasped when he saw what loomed overhead.

The energy Cobbler had released had not fully dissipated. Rather, it had congealed into a gigantic orb that was hovering ominously in the space above them. It was an ugly, swirling mass of black energy that was pulsating and producing a low, loud rumbling sound that grew more dissonant by the moment. Worse, it was starting to fray.

“What in the world is that?!” Cobbler shouted.

Turing stared up at the orb when the calming voice from earlier spoke again.

...

She still couldn’t understand what it was saying, exactly, but she somehow knew that it was warning her. It was still dangerous.

“I understand,” Turing said. “That corrupted energy made up of your hatred and bitterness is no longer tethered to you, Father, but now it is destabilizing. Furthermore, if it seeps from this realm into Equestria, it could be devastating. Others could be corrupted by its influence. Or it may simply detonate, annihilating anypony nearby.

“It must not be allowed to escape.” She nodded decisively. “It must be neutralized.”

“Neutralized?” he repeated, looking to her. “How can I possibly neutralize that?!”

She shook her head. “Not you,” she said. “That energy is something you purged from yourself, but you cannot purify it. I, however, have already purified a portion of the energy given off in the Harmonic Drive’s explosion. I believe I can both utilize the energy I have remaining to neutralize it, then purify what remains by filtering it through my systems.”

“I see,” he muttered, nodding at that. But then he blanched and stared back at her. “But wait… you’re already in danger of burning yourself out to process the energy you’ve got now! If you don’t switch back to neutral mode--”

“I am aware of the risk,” she said calmly. “But I see no other solution.”

“Now you listen here!” he shouted. “You wanted me to accept my role as your daddy, so do what I say! As your father, I absolutely forbid you to do this! You hear me?!”

She looked at him, tilting her head to the side.

“I… I just…” His eyes were again filling with tears. “I just found out I have another daughter. I… I can’t lose another one. Please, not now…”

She placed her hoof to her chest. “Do not worry,” she said. “I believe that I will be successful.”

“How can you possibly--”

“Father,” she said calmly. “I will return to you. But until that time, I have a request. Please… for the sake of my sisters and my brother… would you consider…?”

He nodded. “Yes,” he said. “I… I’ll do right by them as well. You have my word.”

She bowed to him. “Thank you. Now please, you must get to a safe distance.”

“What do you mean a safe--”

Her horn glowed and she cast a spell, teleporting him outside the expanse. Left alone, she looked up at the increasingly large mass of corrupted energy.

Initiating purification…

She launched herself upward, rocketing directly into the center of the swirling mass of chaotic energy.

In the heart of the orb, Turing’s system bombarded her with emergency messages. Her wires were fusing. Her thaumatrium was heating to dangerous levels and could potentially explode. Her mane and tail were beginning to bubble and melt as smoke poured off of her.

Heat at critical levels. Neural network will begin to depolarize in 15 seconds.

She did a calculation: it would take her longer than that to finish purifying the energy around her. She could set a subroutine to carry on the function that long, but there was no way she would escape this without severe damage to her cognitive functions. By the time her core temperature returned to safe levels, her mind would be completely burned out.

Was I incorrect? she asked, suddenly going into a panic. I… Am I going to… die?

…

That voice once again. Though she still couldn’t make out its words, even now, she somehow knew it was telling her not to be afraid.

“But I do not understand,” Turing whispered. “Who are you?”

…

The sound was soft, like the ringing of bells, or a gentle chord played on a piano. She still had no idea what it was, but felt she could trust it. And then it dawned on her.

“Ah… so that is what you are… no wonder…”

***

Celestia and Luna, along with the others, were still assisting the delegates with their escape when the New Dawn exploded. They were nearly knocked to the ground when the shockwave hit, the awful sound forcing them to cover their ears.

Celestia turned and gasped at what she saw.

A massive sphere of energy had burst from the ruined ship and now hung in the sky, glowing like a second sun.

“What in the world is that?” she breathed. All the ponies gathered began to turn and gawk at the sight as well.

Suddenly there was a flash of light just in front of Celestia, and Cobbler Mustang appeared.

“--distance?!”

He looked around in confusion as Celestia, Luna, the delegates, and several members of the Royal Guard all stared at him.

“Ah,” he said, heaving a sigh. He turned to Celestia, who was still staring at him, and removed his hat. “Well, you old battleaxe, it seems that I’ve been bested. I hereby surrender to you and your forces.”

The Royal Guard suddenly sprang into action, surrounding him with spears.

“...A bit slow on the draw, aren’t you there, gentlecolts?”

Celestia shook her head. “Professor Mustang,” she said, walking up to him. “I accept your surrender. Now tell me…”

She pointed up at the glowing orb in the sky.

“...what in Equestria is that?!”

Cobbler looked up, and his eyes went wide.

“Oh… that’s where we were…”

A moment later, Twilight Sparkle landed nearby and galloped over to him.

“Where is she?!” she screamed. “Where’s Turing Test? If you escaped, then--”

Cobbler slowly raised a foreleg, pointing at the gigantic mass of energy in the sky.

“In there,” he breathed. “She stayed behind. She had to neutralize it…”

Twilight and the others all watched for a moment. Then the orb began to shrink, diminishing into itself until it was merely a pregnant dot floating in midair. It shrank further, revealing a figure floating there.

“Turing Test!” Twilight gasped.

The robot was glowing pure white, her outline perfectly still, but featureless as though the light itself had engulfed her. For a moment she hung there in the air, floating as a strangely tranquil tone rang out.

Then, right before their eyes, her image began to break up, crumbling like delicate flakes of snow. The pieces themselves slowly fragmented until nothing was left but shimmering dust that lingered for a moment before even that vanished into thin air.

Where Turing had been a moment before, there was now nothing at all.

Twilight Sparkle’s jaw dropped. “No…” she breathed. “Turing Test… Turing Test… Turing Test!!”

All of the ponies gathered there looked on in disbelief as Twilight shouted her friend’s name again and again, the desperate sound of her shrieks echoing across the gardens.

TO BE CONCLUDED…

Digital Love

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Twilight descended the stone staircase leading to the lowest level of the Canterlot Castle dungeons, Celestia at her side. She had been here once as a filly when she’d asked to tour the castle back when she was first starting out as Celestia’s personal student. She’d hated it and never wanted to return. Now that she was here again as a young adult, she found that her feelings hadn’t changed.

The ancient gray stone stood in sharp contrast to the splendor of the palace above. And where the halls above were wide and cavernous, the low ceilings and narrower halls here in the dungeon served to create a sense of claustrophobia.

Twilight’s ears went back and she lowered her head as they passed the barred cells, filled with TechQuestrian soldiers and crew members of the New Dawn. Nopony said anything to her, but she saw them lock their eyes on her, their gaze burning into her as she went by.

“Eyes forward, Twilight,” Celestia whispered.

Twilight nodded and raised her head, keeping her gaze focused on the door at the end of the hallway. Fixate on a single point, she told herself, remembering the book she’d read entitled How to Act Like Royalty: Even if You Aren’t!, upon becoming a princess. Act as though you are above it all.

It had struck her as egotistical, even arrogant at the time, but now she felt it helped her become detached. At least outwardly, the eyes upon her were not important.

But we still need to deal with them, she thought. And that’s part of the reason we’re here.

The end of the hallway was not their destination. Their destination was further in. A few more twists and turns brought them to a cell with a single occupant.

It had a bunk, a latrine with a sink, and a writing desk. The occupant was at the latter, sketching out something in pencil on a pad of paper.

“Good day, Professor Mustang,” Celestia said.

“Ah ah,” Cobbler said, holding up a hoof as he made a few more strokes with the pencil he clutched in his teeth. He looked at his sketch and gave an approving nod before setting the pencil down. “There we are. Now, how can I help you on this fine day? Assuming it’s a fine day, that is.”

Celestia took a deep breath, her expression impassive.

Twilight, however, had a hard time looking at him, and she frowned. Without his hat, his jacket, his goggles, his boots, or even a bolo tie, Cobbler Mustang looked vulnerable and tired. She’d never realized that the old stallion really wore his age in his face. There were dark circles under his eyes, too, but that hard, seething anger in his eyes was gone.

While she was glad to see it gone, she couldn’t help but feel sorry for him.

“Professor Mustang, I’m here to discuss the current situation,” Celestia said.

Cobbler raised his chin. “I understand,” he said.

Celestia shut her eyes. “TechQuestria is now under the control of our forces. There were some pockets of resistance here and there, but they have surrendered. There were some injuries, but no loss of life.”

“Well, I’m glad,” Cobbler replied. He heaved a sigh. “So, now that it’s under your control, what will you do?”

“That’s part of what we’re here to discuss,” Celestia said. “The TechQuestrian Council is currently being led by a pony named Alfalfa Sprouts. He has volunteered to speak as one of the representatives of your fledgling nation and is acting as an intermediary between the Royal Guard and the rest of TechQuestria.

“However, the nation itself is in shambles. A large number of ponies simply fled ahead of the invasion. For instance, some of the ponies Twilight and her friends mentioned, like Commander Lugnut and a nurse named Valentine, appear to have given us the slip. In total, about a third of all TechQuestrians have gone. We have no idea where they might have gone. Do you?”

Cobbler shook his head. “I confess that I don’t,” he said.

“I see,” Celestia said. “That still leaves the matter of what to do with you.”

“With the ponies of TechQuestria or me personally?” he asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Both,” Celestia replied. “On one hoof, you’re technically traitors to Equestria… and a great many of the Royal Guard are calling for you all to be treated as such.

“However,” Celestia said, raising a hoof before Cobbler had a chance to decry this, “grouping you all together is impractical and unfeasible. Jailing you all sounds tyrannical. And then there’s the matter of all the… complications that have resulted from your invasion.”

Cobbler raised an eyebrow. “Complications?” he asked.

Twilight sighed, speaking up for the first time since they’d arrived. “There have been multiple demonstrations here in Canterlot, as well as a few more in Manehattan and other cities around Equestria,” Twilight said, “calling for either your release, free elections of a national government, or relaxing laws with regard to new technology. Sometimes all three.”

Cobbler grinned. “Really, now?”

“You shouldn’t be so smug.” Celestia leaned down to meet his eyes. “These actions could be the beginnings of a second revolt! And with the ponies who’ve escaped your terrorist state free to spread dissent, the situation could escalate! In the past several months, I’ve learned that perhaps there is some need for change, but now you’ve forced things. Ponies are entertaining revolutionary ideas and demanding changes immediately, some even at the cost of violence.

“As much as I hate to say it, Professor Cobbler, you have become a hero to some. Having you publicly decry these calls for a revolution might be the key to staving off an uprising.”

“Well well well,” Cobbler chuckled, going to his cot. He took a seat and lay down. “My dear princess, it seems to me that this is just a case of your chickens coming home to roost.”

“You said you regretted almost starting a war!” Celestia said incredulously. “You said you were wrong to have threatened Canterlot!”

“I was,” he said quietly, shutting his eyes. “And I do regret it. What I did, I did out of hatred and anger… and for that, I am truly sorry.” Then he opened one eye slightly, glancing over to Celestia and Twilight. “But if you two are here to ask for my help, then you’ll need to offer me something in return.”

Celestia narrowed her eyes. “Such as?”

“I suppose you and Luna won’t abdicate, but establishing a parliament might do the trick.”

Celestia shook her head. “Equestria is not ready to elect a national government. The change is too quick. It would only spread more chaos.”

“Well, then, I don’t see what I have to gain from helping you.”

“Don’t you have any sense of decency?! The nation could be in danger!”

“The cat’s out of the bag now, Celestia, and the decisions you’ve made are coming back to bite you. It may take some time, but one day you’ll have no choice but to accept a democracy. The way I see it, you can either accept the change now, or some other pony will stage a coup on their own.”

“Unbelievable!” Celestia shouted. “Don’t you care at all about preserving the peace?!”

“Peace?” Cobbler echoed with a humorless laugh. “More like the stagnant status quo!”

“Enough!!”

Twilight’s scream echoed throughout the bare stone halls of the dungeon. Celestia and Cobbler both froze, turning to stare at her.

“Can’t you both see that fighting each other like this won’t get us anywhere?!” Twilight shouted.

Cobbler stood and went to the bars of his cell. Celestia only stared back at Twilight, still in shock to hear Twilight speak to her in such a way.

“Listen,” Twilight said, taking a calming breath, “you’ve both made mistakes.

“Celestia, I can already see how you’ve begun to change your stance on technology, but you’re still treating your subjects like they aren’t capable of handling greater freedom. I know the idea of giving them more power scares you, but you can’t ask Professor Mustang to help and expect things to simply go back to normal.”

Twilight placed her hoof on Celestia’s side.

“You have to acknowledge that he has a point. We need to give ordinary ponies a greater say in how Equestria is run.”

She then turned to Cobbler.

“As for you, Professor Mustang, you hurt ponies and endangered an entire nation. Now, whether you’re leading it or somepony else is, you might have laid the groundwork for another war. You can’t pretend that it has nothing to do with you! Do you really want those ponies’ deaths on your conscience?”

Cobbler’s ears folded back, and he bowed his head. “I… no,” he said quietly. “I want a democracy, but I’m no longer willing to risk other ponies’ lives to get it. I can’t quite believe how far I was willing to go.”

“Then both of you need to put aside your differences and learn to compromise,” Twilight said, her voice stern. “You each need to give up something, or else all of Equestria may suffer! We all need to do everything we can to protect the ponies in our lives! The ponies we care about! We have to, so what happened to Turing Test never happens again!”

She began to tear up, but wiped the hot, angry tears away, inwardly cursing herself for losing her composure in front of them both.

“Twilight,” Celestia whispered, putting her hoof on Twilight’s shoulder. “I’m sorry. I know you are still aching from your loss.”

Cobbler bowed his head. “You’re right as usual, Twilight,” he said. “I apologize… I suppose old habits are difficult to break. I’ve been harboring a grudge against Celestia for ten years. Even now, I have difficulty with the idea of working together with her willingly.”

Celestia sighed. “Professor Mustang, your creation… your daughter helped me see how ruled I was by my fear of technology. Like you, I once believed it impossible that she had anything resembling a mind. Or a heart. But Turing Test changed me.”

“Yes, well,” Cobbler said, offering her a weak smile, “she does seem to have that effect on ponies, myself included. If it hadn’t been for her, I might not have seen the ugliness I’d let consume me. The way I treated her and her siblings, why I… I can hardly bear it.

“Princess Twilight is correct: we ought to follow the example my daughter set for us and adapt. I’m certain we can come up with some sort of compromise.”

“Very well, then,” Celestia said. She took a deep breath. “In that case, I’ve made my decision about something.

“The delegates offered your nation independence in exchange for ceasing your attack. Even though you rejected it, I’m prepared to offer it again to the TechQuestrian Council. It’s only right to honor what the delegates decided democratically.”

Twilight gasped. “Celestia…”

Cobbler’s eyes widened. “I…” he stammered. “I must say, I did not expect such an offer. Well, I’m not certain how much weight my word carries, but I’ll urge them to accept it.”

Celestia nodded. “I’m glad to have your support,” she said. “It will be a long, long process, but I will do everything in my power to help.”

“You have my thanks, Celestia,” Cobbler said. Then he sighed. “Now, I get the feeling that you’ll want something else in return?”

“You are correct,” Celestia said. “If I am too lenient, then it could be seen as weakness. Luna would have me imprison you and the rest of the crew from the New Dawn down here and throw away the key. She feels that showing any mercy to traitors is tacitly approving of your actions.”

Cobbler rolled his eyes. “She doesn’t care much for me, does she?”

Celestia sighed, even cracking a smile. “No. No, she does not.”

“Well, then, I have a proposal that ought to please her,” Cobbler said. He straightened himself out, raising his head high. “I’ll accept the full responsibility for TechQuestria’s actions. Let my crewmembers go, grant them amnesty, and I’ll answer for them. That should satisfy ponies’ sense of justice, and I’ll denounce anypony who attempts to follow in my hoofsteps toward a violent coup. That ought to help stave off another uprising.”

Twilight and Celestia exchanged a look.

“Professor,” Twilight began, “are you sure you’re willing to do that?”

“Yes, I am,” he replied. “I am responsible. I led TechQuestria away from its goal of secession and toward a revolution. I led the attack, and I was the one who threatened the peace of Equestria. I’ll accept the responsibility.”

Celestia nodded. “Thank you,” she said. “In return, I’ll see about finding you a less restrictive prison cell.”

Cobbler raised an eyebrow. “I don’t suppose I get a trial, do I?” he asked.

“Actually, you have the right to one, if you choose,” Celestia replied. “But in light of everything, I doubt you’d win.”

“I suppose not,” Cobbler chuckled. “But before I make it too easy on you… what about your stance on technology?”

“I’ll release the hold on your research regarding the artificial heart,” she said. “And I’ve informed Mr. Umahara that, as of this morning, I’ve reinstated his father’s medical license.”

Cobbler’s eyes went wide, and he looked up to meet her gaze. “I…” he began, his mouth working in silence while he found his words. “Thank you,” he said quietly. “At least I was able to help Dosanko find some vindication. And perhaps I can at least lay claim to something that saved lives rather than threatened them.”

“Other than Turing Test,” Twilight whispered.

Cobbler went to the bars, reaching through to her. Twilight turned and took his hoof in hers.

“Listen to me, Twilight,” he said, staring intently at her. “I created Turing Test, that’s true. But you’re the one who raised her. You made her the pony she became. I can never lay claim to that.”

Twilight’s lip quivered, but she shut her eyes tightly, giving a short nod.

Satisfied, Cobbler turned his attention back to Celestia. “Now, what about those ponies who want a greater say in how their country is run? And those who are still calling for greater advancements in technology in Equestria?”

Celestia pursed her lips, looking away. “I confess that I don’t really know what to do,” she said. “I still do not believe Equestria is ready for a wholly democratic government, even if I admit it is more ready than I thought, nor am I certain where to begin in terms of evaluating or regulating technology. I am willing to work toward both, but I simply do not know how to proceed.”

For the first time in the last three days, Twilight managed a smile. “Actually, I think I have an idea,” she said.

She spoke. They listened. When she’d finished her proposal, they both agreed to throw their support behind it.

“Then there’s one more thing, Professor,” Twilight said. “What about the other robots? In your testimony about what happened in that other plane, you stated that you promised Turing to ‘do right by them.’”

Cobbler bowed his head. “Indeed I did,” he said. “And I shall honor that promise. A Mustang’s word is his bond.” He turned to Celestia. “Princess, with your permission, if I could send for them…?”

Celestia nodded. “I’ll have them brought to you as soon as I can,” she said.

Twilight sighed with relief. “I’m glad,” she said.

The matter mostly settled, Twilight turned to leave Celestia and Cobbler to figure out the remaining details.

“Twilight!” Cobbler shouted.

Twilight paused, not looking back at him.

“I know you think she must have perished,” he said. “I know it looked like that’s what happened. But I have faith that my daughter is still alive. I’m not certain how, but something tells me that it’s so.”

Twilight still did not meet his eyes. “I want to believe that too,” she whispered, her voice breaking, and she walked away.

She held her head high and tried once again to fixate on a single point... but it was much more difficult to maintain your detachment when you couldn’t stop crying.

***

The invasion of Canterlot had been national news. The journalists and photographers in Canterlot had been there firsthoof, of course, and so the front pages of newspapers all across the nation had been plastered with images of the New Dawn, Cobbler, and, of course, Turing Test.

In no time at all, word had spread about the robotic hero who had saved Canterlot, reigniting public interest in automata and technology in general. As it turned out, all the propaganda TechQuestria had shown had fueled that even further. Talon Turing found himself faced with a slew of questions about his work, and the issue of Scientific Equestrian with his article about Turing Test quickly sold out, forcing a second printing. Cornelius Vanderbull was suddenly flooded with new investors, as were many of his competitors… a mixed blessing, by his reckoning.

Questions about the military’s readiness were also thrown around. Technology had been the deciding factor in the invasion, after all: the more technologically advanced troops from TechQuestria had overrun Canterlot, but in the end they were defeated in turn only because they hadn’t been prepared to fight a robot with none of the weaknesses of normal ponies. Quietly, Research and Development units were founded for both the Royal Guard and the Night Guard with the goal of improving Equestria’s military might. A few of TechQuestria’s scientists even came on board.

Work also began on some of the advancements TechQuestria had showcased. Plans were made for radio towers and telephone systems. Medicines like the cure for Bucker’s Hips were released. Dr. Hawkeye agreed to give a lecture in Canterlot regarding some of TechQuestria’s best advancements, making him something of a celebrity in medical circles. He could have had a job at almost any hospital in Equestria, but he stated that he wished to stay with TechQuestria when it established itself, since the fledgling nation would certainly need doctors.

And amid it all, the tributes and testimonies of Turing Test’s bravery spread throughout the land, even unto the furthest reaches of Equestria…

***

Dr. Chaise Lounge made her way up the hallway of the asylum, her hooves clicking on the checkered linoleum tiles. She carried a clipboard with a few papers as well as the latest newspaper to come from the capital. In that remote location up in the mountains, news travelled slowly.

She proceeded down the hallway a little further until she came to a particular room. She stepped inside and found one of the nurses checking the patient’s pulse.

She still slept there, still wearing her habit, still tied to her hospital bed, barely breathing, unchanged in all these months.

“Any change?” Dr. Chaise Lounge asked.

“No, doctor,” the nurse said. She peered over to see the newspaper she carried. “Oh, is that today’s paper?” she asked, snatching it up eagerly with her magic.

“Yes, and I suspect it’s something that would interest our patient here,” the doctor said. “Look at the story on the bottom half of the page.”

The nurse looked and began to read it. “This is about that robot… the one the patient confronted!”

Dr. Chaise Lounge nodded solemnly.

The nurse scanned the page. She frowned. “Oh,” she whispered. “How brave… to think that a mechanical pony did all that. Saving Equestria, stopping those terrorists, and even convincing the pony who created her to cooperate with the princesses… and after all that, she sacrificed her own life!”

Dr. Chaise Lounge sighed. “Yes, it’s a real loss,” she said. “Princess Twilight must… be…”

The nurse noticed the doctor had stopped speaking and looked up. Chaise Lounge’s eyes were wide and her mouth was hanging open. She looked as though she’d seen a ghost.

“Doctor?” she asked. “What is it?!”

Then she followed her eyes. She turned around and looked. She screamed.

Grace lay there, her deep blue eyes open. She gave a long yawn.

“Oh my,” she murmured, smacking her lips. “You know, I’m not certain how long I was asleep, but for some reason now, I suddenly feel so very…”

She brought her lips up into a sweet smile, her eyes locking onto them.

“...refreshed.”

***

Pinkie Pie’s hooves crunched on the gravel as she approached the little cabin, the only structure for miles in the Western Badlands.

She hesitated for a moment, but then she knocked. She heard movement in the tiny cabin and took a deep breath.

The door opened. Maud Pie stood there, her expression emotionless as always.

“Oh,” Maud said, her eyebrows lifting slightly as she saw her sister standing there. “Pinkie. I didn’t expect…”

Then she stopped, seeing Pinkie’s deflated look. Her frown. Her reddened eyes.

“Maud,” she said softly. “I… I need to tell you something.”

Maud swallowed.

“It’s… it’s about Rinny.”

Maud froze. Her deadpan expression began to melt with glacial slowness. Her eyes widened as her lips parted.

“Come inside. Tell me,” she said.

Pinkie Pie’s lip quivered as she nodded, following her elder sister inside.

Pinkie Pie would remember a lot of things in her life. But the sight she saw that day broke her heart and haunted her for the rest of her life.

It was the first time she ever saw Maud cry.

***

Applejack felt her hooves sink into the soft earth as she came over the hill. It had rained a little bit the previous evening, and the weather was slightly humid as a consequence. She lifted the brim of her hat as she wiped the sweat from her brow.

When she reached the top of the hill, she looked around until she spotted the two she was looking for.

Descending the hill, she found Apple Bloom. The little filly was calling to her partner for the day who was setting down more buckets at the foot of a tall apple tree.

“Hey, sugarcube,” Applejack said, coming up behind her younger sister.

“Whoa!” Apple Bloom cried, putting a hoof to her chest. “Oh… sorry, Applejack, ya startled me. I didn’t even hear ya comin’.”

“Didn’t mean to give ya a fright,” Applejack said.

She and Apple Bloom turned their attention to the row of trees.

001 placed her final bucket under the tree.

“Okay, nice an’ easy now!” Apple Bloom hollered.

“Easy peasy cheese looks skeezy!” 001 shouted back, nodding emphatically as she turned to aim her hindquarters at the tree.

“How’s she doin’ so far?” Applejack whispered, leaning down to Apple Bloom.

“She tried to buck the last tree with ‘er head,” Apple Bloom whispered out the side of her mouth, forcing herself to smile as 001 looked over to them. “An’ that was still better’n the other tries before that. She was wearin’ the dang bucket on ‘er head, squishin’ apples on the ground, an’ it took what felt like years just to get ‘er to stop callin’ ‘em ‘peaches.’”

“That bad, huh?” Applejack asked, making a face.

“She ain’t nowhere near as good as…”

Apple Bloom frowned, her ears flattening as she bowed her head.

“Hey, no talk like that,” Applejack whispered. “She’s just takin’ a bit extra time to get the hang of it.”

“It ain’t that,” Apple Bloom said quietly, watching 001 take aim. “It’s… well, Applejack, when are ya gonna tell ‘er?”

Applejack bit her lip. “I ain’t decided yet,” she replied.

“I know it’s hard,” Apple Bloom said. “It’s still hard fer me to think about. I mean… are they even sure?”

“Depends on who you ask,” Applejack sighed. “Cobbler thinks Turing’s just lost somewhere. Rainbow Dash seems to think she’ll pop up again any day now with stories about bein’ teleported halfway around the world or somethin’. Fluttershy an’ Rarity just don’t wanna talk about it, but they ain’t holdin’ up too well. Gadget an’ that Umahara feller I told ya about are tryin’ to figure it out scientifically, though I couldn’t understand what they meant fer the life o’ me. Poor Pinkie went to go tell Maud. Twilight an’ Spike, well… they’re holdin’ out hope, but I can tell they’re both hurtin’. They’re afraid she ain’t comin’ back.”

“But what do you think, Applejack?” Apple Bloom asked.

Applejack bowed her head. “I saw ‘er, sugarcube,” she whispered. “I saw ‘er break apart into a million tiny pieces. I keep tellin’ myself that maybe what I saw wasn’t really what happened… but the truth is that I don’t see how she could still be alive.”

Apple Bloom gawked at her, tearing up. “But… but we hafta--”

“Me kick da twee now!” 001 shouted, waving to them both.

“Oh!” Apple Bloom cried, sucking in a deep breath as she turned her attention back to 001, giving her a reassuring smile. “Go on ahead, 001!”

“Yeah, you can do it!” Applejack added.

001 nodded and raised her back hooves, giving the tree a strong kick.

The apples rained down from the tree, landing squarely in the buckets 001 had positioned around it.

“She did it!” Apple Bloom cried. “001, ya did it!”

“Me dood it!” 001 shouted back, carrying over a bucket full of ripe, delicious apples. “Look Appajack, me get da appas! Lotsa appas!”

She jumped around, gallivanting proudly at her work.

“Heh,” Applejack chuckled. “Ya sure did, 001. Now let’s get ‘em to the house, an’--”

“Me cook!” 001 shouted. “Me make appa soup fo’ Appajack!”

“I think ya mean applesauce, sugarcube, an’ that really ain’t--”

“Appas go squish now!” 001 shouted, raising her hooves before she proceeded to stomp the apples and the basket into oblivion.

Applejack and Apple Bloom raised their forelegs, shielding themselves from the spray of pulped apples. Apple Bloom glanced over to Applejack, jerking her head in one direction, indicating that she should follow.

The two stepped off a short distance and Apple Bloom took a deep breath.

“Ya need to say somethin’ to 001,” she said.

Applejack looked over her shoulder at 001. “I’m not so sure that’s a good idea,” she said.

Apple Bloom shook her head. “Look, some folks think Turing might still be alive an’ other folks think she… ain’t. But the way 001’s actin’, it’s like she doesn’t even notice Turing Test is gone. I thought ya said she an’ Turing had bonded, but she acts like she don’t even care! Maybe she doesn’t understand. If that’s how it is… well, Applejack, I think ya oughta tell ‘er. At least then she can figure out how she feels.”

Applejack sighed. “I suppose yer right, sugarcube,” she said. Then she offered Apple Bloom a weak smile and ruffled her mane. “Not everyday that yer the one givin’ advice instead o’ me, lil’ sister.”

Apple Bloom blushed, but seemed to swell with pride. “I’d be glad to make it a habit, if ya want.”

Applejack chuckled. “Not if I have anything to say about it,” she said. “All right, you get the rest o’ those apples before 001 smashes ‘em. I’ll talk to ‘er.”

Apple Bloom nodded and did as she was told. Applejack, meanwhile, went back to where 001 was still obliterating the remaining chunks of apple into paste.

“Hey, 001,” Applejack said, “you can quit smashin’ them apples. Actually, I need to talk to ya about somethin’.”

001 stopped, turning to look at her.

“Listen,” Applejack sighed, “I… I wanted to talk to you about Turing Test.”

001 nodded. “Okay. We talk about sissa.”

She swallowed. “You… you remember what we all saw back in Canterlot, right?”

“Saw lotsa stuff.”

“Y-yeah, I know, but I mean… you saw what happened to Turing Test, didn’t ya?”

001 nodded again. “Turry Tess in sky. Big boat blowed up, but Turry Tess in big bright ball. Turry Tess very shiny. Then she turn into sparklies. Lotsa sparklies.”

Applejack bit her lip. So she did see it all, she thought. But it seems like she doesn’t understand it. I gotta try an’ help her understand…

“Sugarcube, you know we all love yer sister a whole lot, right?” she asked.

001 nodded. “My love sissa too! Turry Tess great sissa!”

“Yeah,” she said softly. “Yeah, she… she sure is.” She took a deep breath. “But… she’s gone now, 001.”

“Me know. She go.” 001 tilted her head to the side. “When she come back?”

Applejack felt a lump in her throat. “To tell the truth, we don’t know that she is comin’ back.”

001’s ears twitched. “No come back? Why no come back?”

“The truth is… I mean…” She paused, sniffling as she struggled to say it in a way 001 would understand. “We don’t know that she can come back. We… ain’t sure there’s anything left of ‘er! I mean… it’s… it’s possible that… that she’s--”

“She not dead.”

Applejack’s head snapped up as she gasped, staring at 001. The robot was giving her a sideways look. It was the kind of look Granny Smith used to give her whenever Applejack had done something foolish. It was the kind of look that said, “Just how thick are ya?”

“She… ain’t?”

001 seemed to roll her eyes. “She no dead. She go big twee.” She started to walk away, apparently to try and gather more apples.

“H-hold up, now!” Applejack shouted, going over and seizing her by the shoulders. “What do you mean? What tree?!”

***

Twilight entered the throne room of her castle. The thrones bearing each of her friends cutie marks were arranged around the crystalline table at the center of the room.

Spike was taking an afternoon nap. She couldn’t blame him, of course… neither one had slept very well in the last few days. Partly to blame were all the meetings and letters they’d had to write to help Celestia and Luna manage the problem of dealing with TechQuestria. That had been difficult enough on its own, but it was made so much worse that she had to do it while grieving her loss.

She could still be alive, she told herself. We don’t know what happened.

That much was true. Cobbler certainly seemed to think so. But just the same, seeing what happened to her, it was difficult to know if he was right or if it was just wishful thinking.

Turing Test… we spent all that time getting her back only for this to happen…

She took a seat at her throne, looking at the magical table with tired, bloodshot eyes. She placed a hoof on it, causing the magical map of Equestria to appear. She stared out at the three-dimensional plane, the images of the cities, forests, and mountains sprawling out before her.

“I don’t suppose you know where she is,” Twilight whispered. “Do you?”

The map was silent as always. It merely glowed, showing the nation, but giving no answer to her question.

Twilight bowed her head. “I didn’t think so,” she said. She leaned over the table, burying her head in her forelegs. She was so tired…

Her eyes felt heavy. Despite the hardness of the table, its smooth, cool surface suddenly seemed very inviting. She shut her eyes and her breathing slowed. After many sleepless nights, Princess Twilight Sparkle slept.

***

…

“Twilight Sparkle.”

***

Twilight awoke with a jolt, gasping as she sat bolt upright.

She looked around for a moment, her heart still beating rapidly.

“T-Turing Test?!” she whispered breathlessly.

The room was empty, but she felt certain, absolutely certain that she’d heard her friend’s voice.

“Where…?”

She glanced down at the map, and the answer came to her.

Her eyes lit up, and for the first time in days, she broke into a beaming smile.

“Spike!” she shouted, galloping from the room. “Spike, come quick! I need you!”

***

Unit online. Beginning visual scan.

Her ocular sensors came on. There was a ceiling. It was a low, plaster ceiling, beige in color. She was in a perfectly square room. A dresser with a mirror over it was on one side of the room, and a writing desk near a bookcase was on the other. The floor was bare, wooden panels. A window across from her sent light streaming into the room.

Her ocular sensors could tell her that much. But something was wrong. She couldn’t tell the exact length and width of the room. She couldn’t register any infrared or ultraviolet light or any other energy signatures for that matter. But, for some reason, the warm, earthy colors of the wooden furniture were comforting.

Comforting… why should colors be that way? They are simply colors. That does not compute.

She raised her head. She was in a bed, lying under purple covers. She gently pushed the covers off her.

Suddenly she was awash with new input. She detected a slight change in pressure, temperature, and texture… but all the data was strange.

She tested this by sitting up, pressing her hoof into the bed. The mattress gave and bounced back. It was… soft? Squishy? It felt nice.

Felt?!

The data suddenly made sense. The bed was warm and soft. The smooth cotton sheets slid off her body as she sat up and she was feeling them on her hull.

She raised her foreleg and gasped.

Her foreleg was covered in gray fur.

“My hull!”

Her ears twitched, but there was no squeak that accompanied it.

My voice sounds different as well. I detect no metallic echo from my faceplate.

Her body was covered with fur, her ears didn’t squeak on her hinges, and she-- she realized she’d just gasped.

“I am… breathing?” she asked aloud. “What is happening? How can this be possible?”

Her eyes suddenly felt strange, and she blinked.

Then she froze. I blinked? I blinked! I… I have eyelids?!

It dawned on her what this could all mean and she got up, her hooves clattering on the wooden floor as she ran to her dresser. She placed her hooves on top of it to look into the oval mirror placed above it.

Her voice caught in her throat as tears filled her eyes. With a shaky hoof, she reached out and touched the mirror, confirming that the image before her was actually her own reflection.

The pony in the mirror looked back at her with familiar features: a gray coat, white curls in her mane, and vibrant purple eyes.

But the truth of what she was seeing dawned on her, and though she scarcely dared to speak for fear of it all ending, she whispered it to herself if only to confirm it to be true:

“I am… I am alive.”

She covered her mouth with her hooves, which she now realized were hard and bone-like. She sank to the ground, shivering with the realization, but then forced herself to stand to take in the sight of herself.

“My ears!” she exclaimed, bending them and watching how they moved and folded. “My mouth! I… I have lips! I have teeth! I have a tongue!”

She stuck it out and wiggled it, giggling at how silly she looked.

She froze. “I laughed! I…” She began to tear up again. “Oh… laughter really does feel wonderful!”

She shook her head, continuing to examine herself. “My eyes… they are so… so beautiful!” She walked back, examining her legs and tail, enjoying the sensation and the whispery sound of her hoof as she ran it along her coat to her flank.

She leaned back and tumbled to the ground, giggling as her back came to rest against her bed. She looked down at her belly and poked it, her giggling intensifying as she noted how soft and squishy it was.

“My body… it is so strange! My face, my legs, my tail, my hooves…”

Lost in a euphoric symphony of sensations, she brought her hooves to her chest and paused. As she breathed in and out, she could detect a rhythmic beating.

Her lip quivered, and she shut her eyes, holding her hooves to her chest. “M-my heart,” she whispered. “This sound is my own heart. My heart is beating…”

“Hey!”

She gasped and sat up. There was a voice coming from somewhere else in the house.

“Turing Test, we can hear you bumping around up there! Come on down, girl, you’re late for breakfast!”

Turing blinked. “Breakfast?” she asked.

Her belly rumbled.

“Oh!” she cried. “Oh, so this must be what it feels to be hungry! Yes! Yes, I am hungry!”

It still felt strange to hear how clear her voice sounded, but she decided not to dwell on it. Somepony was calling her, so she decided to respond.

“Acknowledged! I will be there in a moment!” she shouted back.

She opened her door and found herself in a hallway in a house. Her room was almost at the end, but there were other rooms on either side of the hallway. Many ponies lived in this house, apparently.

She followed down the hallway in the direction of the voice. A flight of steps led down to the first floor. She passed by the front door and turned to her left to see a living room with a fireplace, but she continued onward when a new sensation hit her.

Her nostrils twitched. She tried breathing in through her nose, and all at once it hit her.

I have olfactory senses! I can smell now! But what is this aroma…?

Her mouth began to water.

Ah… it is food. Oh, but if I can smell things, then that means I can taste them as well! I hope they have apple pie!

She ran through a doorway and was confronted with a sight. There was a spacious kitchen with a large table in the center. Several other ponies were seated around it. The pony at the head of the table was reading a newspaper, but he lowered it, raising an eyebrow at her.

“Well, good morning, sleepyhead!” he said. “Why, I thought I was going to need a bucket of water to wake you up! And don’t think I wouldn’t do it, too!”

It was Cobbler Mustang. Her father was sitting at the head of the table, enjoying breakfast.

“F-father?” she stammered.

“Last I checked,” he said, going back to his paper as he picked up a piece of toast.

“Daddy, no readin’ at the table!” said another familiar voice as its owner pushed down the paper.

Turing gawked when she saw her. It was Georgia Peach, and she was serving the rest of the family breakfast.

Turing looked at the others seated around the table as it dawned on her who they were: her family.

A gray, green-eyed pony with a messy white mane was seated next to Cobbler. She was face down in her breakfast, bits of egg and fruit all over her muzzle. She looked up and waved to Turing.

“Hi, Turry Tess!” she exclaimed, smiling at her. “You sleep too much! Big sleepyhead!”

001! Turing realized.

“Who could blame her?” said the next pony down from her in a harsh voice. She had the same gray coloring, but a longer mane and an eyepatch. She brushed her mane out of her face to look at Turing with her solitary yellow eye. “After all, sleep beats the tedium of real life any day.”

Turing gasped again. “002?” she asked.

“What?” 002 replied dryly, taking a sip of black coffee. “Are you going to tell me to be less gloomy? If so, you’re too late. Dad beat you to it.” She sighed, putting her foreleg on the table as she rested her chin on her hoof.

“Young lady, I’ll thank you to keep your existential angst and elbows off the table,” Cobbler said, giving her a sour look.

“Tch. I’ll take my elbows off,” she replied, “but the torment of the aching void that is my life is pervasive and all-consuming.”

“You hush now,” Georgia said, coming over to 002 and ruffling her mane as she placed another plate before her. “Save it for that poetry group you have this afternoon an’ eat your pineapple. Unless you don’t want it,” she added, reaching for the plate.

“I didn’t say that,” 002 said hurriedly, holding her forelegs protectively over the plate of pineapple.

Then a voice behind Turing said, “Sis? You are in my way.”

She whirled around, her heartbeat quickening when she recognized that deep, booming voice.

A very tall stallion stood there, gray like her other siblings, save Georgia, with a short mane and tail. He had hard, serious blue eyes that locked onto her as she looked down.

“004?” she asked.

“Yes,” he replied, raising an eyebrow. “Will you please move? I would like to get my breakfast before I leave for work.”

He placed a police officer’s cap atop his head.

“Sorry, bro, but Georgia didn’t make any donuts,” 002 said with a snicker.

“I can eat many things besides donuts,” 004 stated matter-of-factly, coming into the kitchen as Turing stepped aside. “Though I do enjoy them.”

“Me like donuts!” 001 cried. “Do-nuts! Do-nuts! Do-dee-do-dee-dooonuts!” she sang.

“No donuts,” Georgia said, pulling out 004’s chair. “Just some eggs, fruit, an’ toast. You eat up now, hear?”

“Understood,” he said, somehow managing to fit his massive frame onto the tiny seat. He smiled at Georgia, adding, “Thank you, Georgia Peach.”

“Sure,” she said, smiling back. Then she looked to Turing. “Well, why on earth are you still standing there, Turing?” she asked. “Why, you look as though you’ve seen a ghost!”

Turing was speechless as she looked around at them all.

“You… you are all here,” she whispered. “You are all alive.”

“Turing Test, what a thing to say!” Cobbler exclaimed. Then he paused, frowning, and got to his hooves. “Oh, sweetheart, did you have a bad dream? Ohhh, you come here, now.”

And then, before she knew what was happening, he hugged her.

He is hugging me… my father… he is hugging me…

She began to tear up again as she returned the hug. She felt the warmth and safety of being embraced by another. Then another pair of forelegs were around her. Then another, and yet another.

Soon her whole family was there, holding her.

“Hush now,” Georgia whispered. “Ain’t no more nightmares here, Turing.”

Turing heard a sigh and saw 002 come over. She didn’t join the group hug, but she did pat Turing on the head.

“There there,” she mumbled. “There there…”

“Ah,” Turing said, managing a smile. “Thank you, everypony. I am sorry to have troubled you.”

“Uh huh, okay, good, now let’s knock off this syrupy, saccharine horse hockey and get back to breakfast!” 002 snarled, returning to her seat.

The others all chuckled, rolling their eyes as Turing took her seat.

Sitting before her were scrambled eggs, toast with butter and marmelade, and sliced peaches. There was also a hot cup of tea.

Turing picked up a slice of peach first, slowly opening her mouth, afraid to somehow do this wrong, and placed it between her teeth. She took a bite.

She breathed in, her eyes going wide as the sweetness and texture of the fruit filled her mouth, the juice bursting as she chewed. She chewed and chewed until at last she began to attract some strange looks and realized she was supposed to swallow.

As she felt it slide down her throat, her belly growled. Apparently, it wanted more.

For the first time ever, she ate her breakfast.

“By the way, Turing Test, Georgia would like your help planting her garden this morning,” Cobbler said, “but don’t forget about that picnic you’ve got with your friends, all right?”

“M-my friends?” Turing stammered.

“Yes,” he replied, raising an eyebrow. “You know… Twilight, Fluttershy, that nice Rarity girl…”

“Oh!” she cried. “Of course! My friends! My friends are here!”

“No, they’re not,” 002 snapped. “They’re at home. You’re meeting them at the park, if you forgot. Ugh… you’re even goofier than usual today.”

“You do seem a mite goofy,” Cobbler said, shrugging his shoulders. “But just the same, try not to be late. Your big sister made you a peach pie just for the occasion, after all. Now eat your breakfast before it gets cold!”

Turing nodded, returning to her meal as a thought filled her mind: How can this possibly be?

***

That same question was on her mind as she made her way through Ponyville that afternoon. And yet, as she walked past the buildings and shops and ponies she knew so well, she could barely stay focused on it.

Everywhere she went, she saw her friends as they waved to her. Lyra, Bon Bon, Derpy, the Doctor, Vinyl and Octavia, Bulk Biceps, the Mayor, the Cutie Mark Crusaders, and so many more… they all looked at her like it was the most normal thing in the world. And as she went, feeling the blades of grass and dirt beneath her hooves and the warm sunshine on her face, she couldn’t stop herself from smiling even as she carried her picnic basket in her teeth.

She paused every so often to say hello, to stop and smell the flowers for sale, noting how they differed from the ones in Georgia’s garden, and to admire the things being sold in the windows. At long last, she found that she had an opinion about their colors and shapes, and wondered how she could ever have looked at them before without grasping how beautiful or ugly things looked.

And still, at each shop window, she caught herself refocusing her gaze and noting her own reflection. And knowing the pony in the mirror was her, she felt a little thrill that sent shivers down her spine.

It is so nice to know what shivers are, and to know what it means to have them go down your spine, she told herself. Also, having a spine. That is nice as well.

At each window, she tried making faces, contorting her ears, lips, and eyes into different expressions to experiment showing the sort of emotions she’d seen her friends do before. She had been right about how expressive eyes could be…

“Ohhh,” she moaned. “I love my new eyelids.” She shut her eyes, rubbing her eyelids as she sighed affectionately.

“What are you doing?”

Turing froze, removing her hooves. Her cheeks felt hot. Ah, so this is embarrassment… I do not think I like it.

“Ah ha ha, my apologies,” she chuckled nervously as she turned. Wait… that voice sounds familiar…

She faced the pony who’d spoken to her and froze.

It was Maud Pie. “Hello, Turing,” she said in her usual deadpan. “Were you just rubbing your eyelids?”

Turing’s blush intensified. “I…” She tried to think of some sort of lie, but then paused, realizing that she didn’t want the first thing she said to Maud Pie as an organic to be a lie. “Yes. I was,” she admitted.

“Hm,” Maud Pie murmured. Then she gave her a half smile. “All right. I just wanted to know.”

Turing smiled and looked over Maud Pie more directly, noting the color of her frock, her mane, her tail, and her eyes… and the shape of her body as it curved out near her flank…

She felt her heart rate begin to accelerate. All at once, she felt very different. Nervous… but also giddy. She felt a strange, tingly sensation, marveling in the change this was producing in her body.

“Oh, ah, Maud Pie… what are you doing here?” she asked.

“I need to buy some cleaning fluid for Boulder,” she said, removing the small pebble from her pocket. “He got kind of dirty playing Camouflage earlier.”

“But why are you in Ponyville?”

Maud raised an eyebrow. “I live here,” she said.

Turing’s grin widened.

“Why are you smiling like that?” Maud asked. “You’re acting like you didn’t know.”

“I am sorry, Maud Pie,” she said. “It seems that I am… confused today.”

Maud nodded slowly. “Okay,” she said nonchalantly. She turned to go.

“Ah, wait, M-Maud Pie?” Turing asked, reaching after her.

“Hm?” Maud asked.

“May… may I…” She gulped, feeling her chest tighten. “May I please hold you?”

Maud’s expression didn’t change, but she did draw in a breath rather sharply.

“Okay,” she said.

Turing approached her gingerly, raising her forelegs as she slowly encircled them around Maud. Then she held her, feeling the warmth of her body and the beating of her heart beating in time with her own, and the faint smell of her mane.

Ohhh, I love this, she realized. This is what it means to hold her.

She sighed and rested her head on Maud’s shoulder. “Maud Pie,” she whispered contentedly.

Maud hugged her back. “I’m glad to see you too,” she said, patting her on the back. “But we should probably stop. Some ponies are starting to stare.”

“O-oh, yes, of course!” Turing said hurriedly, laughing as she released her.

Maud paused, rubbing her chin. “Do you want to go out tonight?” she asked. “We could have dinner, or go to the cinema, or see some stand-up comedy.”

Turing beamed. “Yes, Maud Pie! I would enjoy all of those things!”

“Okay,” Maud said. “I’ll come by at seven.”

She leaned in. Turing gasped, startled by the gesture…

And then Maud’s lips were on hers.

They are so warm… and so soft…

Maud drew back. It was only a brief kiss, but it was the first Turing had ever experienced.

“See you tonight,” Maud said, turning and walking away.

Turing only grinned, giving a happy sigh as she watched Maud Pie go.

***

Turing galloped up the hill in the middle of the park, arriving on the scene.

“Oh, there you are, Turing!” Twilight said, seeing her standing there. “We were starting to worry!”

“More like we were about to starve!” Rainbow Dash groaned, rubbing her belly. “Since when are you this slow, Tee?”

Turing set down her picnic basket gently, and then she stared at them all, her mouth hanging open.

“Careful, Rinny!” Pinkie Pie said, going over to her and shutting her mouth for her. “If you keep your mouth open like that, you’ll catch flies!”

“An’ they won’t taste half as good as all the food we got here!” Applejack added. “Speakin’ o’ which, I sure hope you brought that peach pie o’ yer sisters! It ain’t as good as Granny’s apple pie, but it sure is somethin’!”

But then they all stared as Turing Test’s eyes filled with tears and she began to cry.

“Turing?!” Twilight exclaimed, going over to her and putting her hoof on her shoulder. “Are you hurt? Was it something we said? What’s wrong?!”

But Turing suddenly embraced her, holding her tightly as she rocked her back and forth. “Nothing is wrong, Twilight Sparkle,” she whispered. “Everything is perfect now…”

***

If breakfast had been an experience in and of itself, the picnic lunch was even better. She stuffed her face full of the tiny cucumber sandwiches Fluttershy brought and then guzzled cup after cup of Rarity’s punch.

“My goodness!” Rarity exclaimed. “Darling, you’re eating as though you never have before!”

“I’m just glad she likes it all so much,” Fluttershy said.

“Yes, yes, I appreciate that she likes it,” Rarity said, making a face, “but she doesn’t have to wolf it all down like that!”

“Rarity’s right!” Spike said. “After all… if you eat too much now, you won’t want any dessert!”

Turing froze. “Dvrt?” she manage to say with her mouth stuffed full of food.

Applejack held up the two pies. “Hey, you brought one yerself,” she said. “Now, if you don’t want a slice--”

Turing gulped. “I would love one!” she cried. “I want to try both!”

Twilight laughed. “You’re acting so enthusiastic today, Turing!” she said.

Then her expression changed, turning almost somber. “It’s… it’s very nice to see.”

***

The pies were quickly sliced and devoured. Turing Test honestly couldn’t decide which of them she’d enjoyed more, but she was more than willing to conduct more tests to find out.

Her belly full almost to the point of discomfort, she lay on the blanket, stretching out her legs and giving a contented moan.

“Today… this was everything I ever wanted,” she said aloud.

“It was?” Twilight replied. “That’s good. We’re so glad.”

“But I cannot understand it,” Turing said. Then she frowned. “My family is here in Ponyville. We are all together and whole again. My friends are here and safe. Maud Pie is here with me, and we can be together. And… and I am experiencing so many new sensations… these senses… this body…”

The others were all strangely quiet. She watched a cloud go by, noting it was shaped like a crescent moon.

“What has happened?” she asked, sitting up. “Was the life I once had all an illusion? Was I never a robot?”

The others were all silent. She didn’t turn to look at them, and wondered if she should say anything at all, but still she persisted.

“I can remember it all,” she said. “I remember the things I did. The memories of my life are as vivid to me now as this picnic and this perfect day… they must have been real. Yes, that was real. I was a robot, but now it seems that I am not. This all seems like paradise… paradise…”

She gasped. “Perhaps this is some sort of afterlife,” she said. She whirled around, looking to all her friends who all wore sad smiles. “But if this is so… then I have died. And… oh no… my friends, you too have--”

“That is… not quite correct,” said a new voice. The world seemed to freeze, and a tone rang out overhead.

Turing looked up at the cloud shaped like the crescent moon. It shifted and morphed and drifted down to earth before dissipating. In its place stood a pony she knew well.

“Princess Luna!” Turing cried, getting to her hooves. “Why are you here?”

“Surely you must realize it by now, don’t you?” Luna replied.

Turing blinked. If this was no afterlife, and if her old life was real, and if Luna was here now, then…

“This is not real,” Turing whispered. “I am… dreaming?”

Luna nodded, giving her a gentle smile.

“But how can that be?” Turing asked. “As a robot, I have never dreamed. I believed that it was impossible for me to dream!”

“Not in this place,” Luna said.

Turing tapped her chin. “In ‘this place’? Then where are we?”

“Turing, listen closely,” she said. “We finally learned what happened to you.

“001 told Applejack that you were in ‘a big tree,’ and Twilight Sparkle heard your voice while asleep at the map in her castle, the one connected to the Tree of Harmony, the source of the Elements. With that, in addition to the research produced by young Gadget and Mr. Umahara, we realized the truth: rather than being destroyed, the Tree of Harmony, once its energy had been purified, used its powers to save you, converting you into a kind of… how did Gadget say it? ‘Energy-based data.’ For some reason, you and your sister seem to have some ingrained ability to communicate with it on some level, and it managed to save you.

“But try as we might, we could not communicate with you. It was as though you were asleep. Therefore, Twilight Sparkle called upon me to help lure you out by giving you something you could not resist: we created a dream depicting your perfect life. This reality around us is the result of that, and lo and behold, you are here.”

Turing blinked. “Then this is all an illusion?” she asked quietly. “I am not truly alive?”

Luna frowned, going to her and placing a hoof on her shoulder. “No, Turing Test,” she said. “But it was, we thought, the best way to draw your consciousness out. We did it to save you so you could rejoin your friends. Your friends did it because they love you and want you back.”

Turing stared back at her for a moment, but then she smiled, tears coming to her eyes. “I see,” she said. “Then all this is merely a gift that you gave me. It is so so wonderful. At last I know what it means to be like other ponies. I know what it means to be alive.”

“No, Turing,” Luna said, shaking her head, “you know what it means to be an organic pony. You were always ‘alive’.”

Turing sniffed, wiping her eyes. “Perhaps you are correct,” she said, laughing quietly to herself. “But it is a shame… I only wish I had been able to share this wonderful experience with my friends. I wish they were really here.”

Then somepony behind her cleared her throat. “Wellll, since you know the truth now anyway,” Rainbow Dash said.

Turing whirled around to look at her friends. They all smiled back at her.

“You mean,” she began, “that you are all here? You are all sharing this dream with me?!”

“That’s right, Turing,” Twilight said. “Luna needed all of us to help form this combined dream, and she needed our connection to the Elements to link to the Tree of Harmony to get to you. We’re all here.”

“And I must say, darling,” Rarity said, going over to Turing and fixing her mane, “you really do look lovely as a normal pony. But just the same, I find that I miss your ‘classic’ look.”

“I’m glad you liked my sandwiches, though!” Fluttershy said, coming over to her as well.

“I was hoping we’d get to have a race, but I guess the dream version of you doesn’t have wings,” Rainbow Dash sighed, elbowing her and giving her a sly wink.

“My friends,” Turing said. “My friends!”

She suddenly embraced Twilight, laughing and crying at once. Never before had she felt so much joy, and she wondered how even an organic pony’s heart could hold it all.

“Turing,” Twilight whispered as she held her. “I’m so glad you had the chance to experience this… but you have to make a tough decision now.”

Turing tilted her head to the side. “Decide what, Twilight Sparkle?” she asked.

“She means,” Luna said, “that it’s time for this dream to end. But, if you choose, you could stay here within the Tree of Harmony. If you do, then you should be able to use your consciousness to create your own dreams. You could form your own life here, living in a simulated reality like this one where you could live life as an organic.

“The other choice is to return with us. But if you do, you will once again be a robot, and this dream will--”

“I will return,” Turing said immediately.

They all froze, their eyes going wide.

“Turing,” Twilight murmured. “Are you sure? Are you absolutely sure?”

Turing smiled and nodded. “I am certain, Twilight Sparkle,” she said. “My life as a robot was imperfect, and I am glad to be able to experience these sensations as an organic being, but the life I built for myself was my own. It has value to me because it is real, even if it is flawed. The truth is that I am a robot; it is part of who I am, and you have all helped me to understand that being a robot does not make me any less of a pony.

“Someday, I hope that I will be able to experience these sensations again, but more important than those things is the time I spend with all of you, the ones I love more than anything.

“I need you all in my life, and I want to be a part of your lives as well. Even the sweetest illusion cannot compare to being myself with all of you.”

Twilight was silent, but she held her hooves to her chest, smiling at her proudly.

“Then, are you ready to return?” Luna asked.

Turing nodded, turning to look at her friends one last time as an organic being. “My friends… thank you…”

***

Twilight and the others awoke, raising their heads from where they slept around the table at the center of the throne room. Luna was floating just above them, her horn still glowing with the dream magic she’d used on them all.

“Did it work?” Spike asked.

They all looked around. Turing was not among them.

“Oh no!” Fluttershy cried. “Did something go wrong?”

“No,” Luna said, opening her eyes. “Just a moment…”

The table before them began to glow. Then, slowly, something began to rise up from it like a creature emerging from the waters of a lake, barely disturbing the surface.

Turing Test rose higher and higher and higher until she stood squarely at the center of the table, completely emerged. The magical glow of the table subsided, leaving only the mechanical mare standing in silence.

Her eyes were dark, but they suddenly blinked on and she began to look around. She looked down and saw her friends staring up at her.

“Hello--oh!” She paused, realizing her voice was back to sounding synthetic, the metallic ring and mechanical stiffness of her speech back in place. She shook her head. “Hello, my friends. I am back.”

The others leaped onto the table, cheering as they embraced her.

She registered the pressure and texture of them hugging her against her hull. She raised her foreleg, moving it gingerly as if to test it.

Twilight noticed the gesture. “Turing?” she asked uncertainly as she let her go. “Are you all right?”

Turing continued moving her leg for a moment. It was heavy, stiff, and dead to all feeling. She was receiving sensory data, but she could no longer feel it.

The sensations are gone, she noted. They are all gone now. I cannot feel as I did in my dream. I had not fully realized how much I would miss them…

She put her hoof down. “I apologize, Twilight Sparkle,” she said. “I was only testing something.”

They all got down from the table.

“We’re so glad to have you back, Turing,” Twilight said. “You… you really worried us all.”

“I apologize for causing you concern,” Turing said. “I am glad to be back with you now, however. But perhaps you can assist me with something: my internal chronometer only detects that a few minutes have passed since my disappearance above Canterlot, yet evidence suggests that this is incorrect. What length of time has actually passed?”

“It’s been about two weeks, Turing,” she said.

Turing’s eyes momentarily shrank before returning to normal size. “Two whole weeks?”

“It really took us some time to figure this all out. We’re just glad it worked!”

“And I bet we’re not the only ones!” Pinkie said in a sing-songy voice as she bounced over to the doors to the throne room.

She opened them and Turing saw who was standing there.

“Maud Pie!” Turing exclaimed.

Maud’s eyes widened, and she calmly trotted over to her.

“You aren’t dead,” Maud said.

Turing shook her head. “No, Maud Pie. I am not dead.”

Maud dropped her eyes to the side and said, “I’m glad.”

Turing shuffled her hooves. “Maud Pie… I wanted to tell you…”

Maud’s lip quivered, and then she suddenly threw her forelegs around her, holding her tight.

“Oh,” Turing said, returning the hug. “Maud Pie… My sweet, wonderful Maud Pie. I am so glad to see you.”

***

“So, let me see if I’ve got this straight,” Gadget said. “The Tree of Harmony is… I mean, the way you describe it, it sounds like a machine!”

She was accompanied by Umahara, Twilight, and Turing Test as they all walked to the train station in Canterlot.

“It would explain why you were able to communicate with it somewhat, Turing,” Umahara said.

“I do not understand it fully myself,” Turing said. “However, there is data of unknown origin in my memory banks that seems to indicate the intention of the Tree of Harmony. As we have surmised, the corruption of the Elements by the Harmonic Drive was causing the Tree of Harmony pain, but I, due to my mechanical nature, was able to interpret its signals as a kind of ‘sound’ or ‘voice.’ During my time within it, it managed to convert and store my being as data, and due to its connection with Twilight Sparkle as well as the two royal sisters, it was able to reach out to them as well to allow me to find a path back to you all.

“But all of this seems to stem from the fact that the Tree of Harmony itself was compatible with me. This may be because we are somewhat based on the same form of technology. The magical runes the Yudacorns used to create their golems may have in turn had their basis on something else that existed long ago.”

“And that ‘something’ was the Tree of Harmony?!” Umahara gasped.

“Or maybe something else that the Tree also originated from,” Gadget wondered, rubbing her chin thoughtfully.

“I believe Gadget may be correct,” Turing said. “From the small amount of data I was able to interpret, the Tree of Harmony is some form of techno-organic being that had its origin with something that existed long before pony civilization began. I have no knowledge of what it was or where it came from, but I did learn that it was called ‘The Caretaker.’”

They all stared at her.

“Wow,” Twilight breathed. “I… am going to write so many research papers!” she squealed.

“I’d call her a nerd,” Gadget said before she also took on a giddy, somewhat manic grin, “but oh my gosh, so am I!”

The two of them were practically bouncing on their hooves as Canterlot citizens around them all gave them sour looks for their improper display.

“All these stuffy Canterlot types,” Umahara grumbled. “I’m sick of them. I’m glad that I’m leaving today.”

Gadget frowned, her ears folding back. “Yeah,” she said. “But it was nice working with you to help get Turing Test back.”

“Yes, that’s true,” he said. “And I guess Celestia isn’t so bad compared to the image I had of her in my head, so working with her to help set up this plan for TechQuestria wasn’t so bad. And if it wasn’t for her pardoning me and giving me back my father’s license, I wouldn’t be taking this trip to go see him now.”

“I’m glad you’re going to see him,” Twilight said. “He sounds like a very kind pony.”

“He is,” Umahara said. “And I’ve barely spoken to him since he left TechQuestria. I’m going to apologize for that and try to make up for it. Maybe I should have left with him all those years ago.”

“But if you had,” Turing pointed out, “you would not have become a spy for TechQuestria, and then you would not have met all of us. Including Gadget.”

“Yeah,” he said, grinning. “I guess you’re right.”

They arrived at the train platform and were greeted by an unexpected guest.

“Gadget! There you are!”

They saw the tall figure striding over to greet them.

“Mr. Vanderbull!” Gadget cried, galloping up to him. “Sir, you’re here! I thought you said you’d meet me in Manehattan!”

“I decided to come and join you personally,” he said. “You’ve taken quite a bit of leave these last few weeks, my dear--”

“Oh!” Gadget cried. “I-I’m sorry, sir! I didn’t mean to neglect my duties!”

“No no no,” Vanderbull said, waving his hand dismissively. “I only meant that you’ve been doing some fascinating work and I wanted to hear all about it on the train ride over. Your reports sent via telegram have been useful, but discussing these matters face to face really would be best. After all, very soon the TechQuestrians will be licensing or outright selling some of their innovations, and I intend to make sure that Vanderbull Industries is at the forefront of this new technological revolution. You, my dear, have firsthoof experience, so I’ll be counting on you to help me make the best decisions.”

She beamed, saluting him. “Yes sir, Commodore!” she said. “And, um, sir?”

“Yes, Gadget?”

Then she used her mechanical limbs to lift herself up to his level and hugged him tightly. “I’m really glad to see you again, sir,” she said quietly.

“Ah,” the gruff old minotaur said, patting his young assistant on the back. “I am very glad to see you as well, Gadget. You’ve made me very proud. And I’ve spoken to your parents, so I know they’re very proud of you too.”

Then he peered around Gadget, noticing Twilight, Turing Test, and Umahara. He gently pushed Gadget back and strolled over to them.

“Ah, Princess Twilight,” he said, bowing to her, “it’s a pleasure to see you again. And you too, Turing Test. I’ve been reading about the tales of everypony’s bravery in the newspapers and in Gadget’s letters.”

“Oh, it’s really nothing,” Twilight said, blushing slightly as she waved off the compliment. “Really, it’s not that impressive.”

“Well, perhaps a little,” Turing said.

Twilight shot her a look.

“I am not certain why you are giving me that look, Twilight Sparkle,” she said. “We kicked flank and took names. Not literally, though, at least in most cases. I only mean that our efforts were very successful compared to the overall odds of success given at the time of--”

“Yes, yes, okay, we were great!” Twilight groaned.

Vanderbull chuckled, but then he glanced over to Umahara, who had gone stiff and was trying hard not to meet his eyes, and his look turned cold.

“So that just leaves you,” Vanderbull said. “You’re Mr. Umahara, formerly known as Fine Print?”

Umahara gulped. “Y-yes, sir,” he replied.

He raised an eyebrow and turned to Gadget.

“Did you punch him?” he asked.

“Yes sir!” Gadget said emphatically. “Right in the nose!”

“Good girl,” he said, smirking. “Now then… I must confess that I’m not sure how I feel about you. You helped my assistant, true, but you also electrocuted her, terrorized her, and sent more of your agents after her.”

Umahara gulped.

“Mr. Vanderbull, please!” Gadget cried. “Just leave him alone, he’s risked a lot to help me and the others! And he helped us figure out how to save Turing Test!”

“Hmph,” Vanderbull said. “I suppose.”

Then he bent down and looked Umahara right in the eyes. “Listen carefully, young stallion,” he said gruffly. “You seem to have redeemed yourself. But if you ever hurt my assistant again or betray her trust, I will pull your tail out by its roots. Do I make myself perfectly clear?”

Umahara nodded. “Yes, sir.”

“Very good, then,” he said, standing back up. “Gadget, our train should arrive in 20 minutes. I take it the train currently boarding is Mr. Umahara’s?”

“Yes, sir!” she said.

“Very well, then,” he said, turning his back as he began to walk away. “Say your farewells and join me in the lobby.”

She smiled, then glanced over to Twilight and Turing.

“Oh, um, hey, Turing,” Twilight said, taking the robot by the foreleg. “Let’s go check out… this… thing over here!”

“Understood,” Turing said, following her. “I enjoy things.”

Now left alone, Gadget and Umahara stood side-by-side stiffly, watching as more and more ponies boarded the train.

“Gadget, I--”
“Umahara, I--”

They both stopped, then chuckled at their own awkwardness.

“Gadget, spending all this time with you lately has been… it’s been great,” Umahara said. “And I know what you said earlier, but… I don’t know, part of me just…”

He sighed, trailing off.

“I know what you mean,” Gadget said, her cheeks coloring again. “You’re sweet and you’re interesting, and I do like you. I mean… yeah, I like you.”

“Yeah?” he asked hopefully.

“Y-yeah,” she said quietly. Then she heaved a sigh. “But part of the problem is that I still have at least a little bit of resentment about what you did. It’s small, but it’s there. And I could overlook that, but then there’s just the question of what we both want to do with our lives. I’m staying in Manehattan with Mr. Vanderbull. And you… well, do you even know what you’ll do after you spend time with your father?”

Umahara ran his tongue around the inside of his cheek. “I’ve thought about it,” he said. “I could go into freelance work. Or I could rejoin TechQuestria and help them establish their country. Or I could come back here to Canterlot… some members of the Royal Guard think I could help them develop better technology for the battlefield.”

Gadget smiled. “That all sounds nice.”

“But…?”

Her smile faded, and she sighed. “But until you know where you want to be and what you want to do, I’m not sure a relationship would be the smartest idea for either of us. You should make a decision based on what you really want, not around a relationship that hasn’t really started.”

Umahara was quiet. “And what if you’re really what I want?”

Gadget’s blush deepened. “D-don’t say things like that,” she whispered. “They’re sweet, but we’re both smart enough to know rushing into something would be bad. After you’ve decided - and you need to make a decision without me being a factor - then we can see about going somewhere else with this, if that’s what we want.”

He nodded. “I see what you mean,” he said. “Yeah, you’re probably right. Okay, I’ll think very hard about it. And if, just if I end up somewhere or someplace where we can give things a try?”

She moved closer to him. “Then you darn well better buy me lunch, you hoser,” she said.

He closed his eyes, nodding. “Okay,” he whispered. This close to her, the scent of her strawberry-scented shampoo filled his nostrils.

The conductor of the train called for all passengers to board.

Gadget and Umahara locked eyes.

She reached up, putting her hoof to his cheek, and kissed him once, gently.

“Good luck,” she said.

He nodded, giving her one last hug. “You too,” he said.

He gave her a smile as he galloped away, boarding the train. A moment later, it pulled out of the station, and he was gone.

Gadget heard hoofsteps behind her. Twilight and Turing Test stood on either side of her, holding her gently.

“Are you okay, Gadget?” Twilight asked.

Gadget sighed. “Yeah, I’m all right,” she said. “Will you two stay with me and Mr. Vanderbull until we leave?” she asked.

“Of course,” Twilight said.

“And I am certain that our paths will cross again soon,” Turing added.

“Yeah,” Gadget said, perking up a little. “You know, I’ll just bet that you’re right.”

***

The stairs spiraled around a stone column, leading upward to the room at the top of the tower.

“Ugh,” Twillight groaned. “I wish I didn’t have to walk up all these steps every time I came here.”

“You could fly,” Turing remarked.

“I… well, I guess I could,” she said. “But I keep feeling like I’ll bump into the walls, fall, and then tumble down the steps. I know, I’m probably being paranoid, but I can’t help feeling like that would happen.”

“It is a shame that you cannot teleport directly to the top,” Turing said. “But as you said, the magical cancellation enchantments placed on this tower would make it impossible.”

Twilight couldn’t help but notice that Turing was moving slightly faster than normal.

“You’re eager to see him, aren’t you?” Twilight surmised, smiling warmly at her.

“Affirmative,” she said. “I have not seen him since I vanished. I…”

She paused suddenly.

“Turing?” Twilight asked.

“Will he want to see me?” she asked. “I was the cause of his incarceration, after all. Perhaps he will--”

“Turing.”

She turned to see Twilight smiling at her reassuringly.

“You’re being silly,” she said. “I know that he wants to see you. He believed you would return more than almost anypony else. You’re the one who saved him, after all. You’re the one he cares about most now.”

Turing nodded. “You are correct, Twilight Sparkle,” she said. “I apologize. I was simply nervous. Let us proceed.”

They went up to the top of the tower. There were two guards posted at the door (which, considering the guards at the foot of the tower, seemed excessive to Twilight), and they saluted Twilight.

“At ease, Guards,” she said. “We’re here to visit the prisoner. The others will be here shortly.”

“Yes, Your Highness!” they both said in unison, parting ways as one unlocked the door.

They entered and found themselves in a simple circular room. It was fairly small for being at the top of a tower on the palace grounds, but it was nonetheless decorated in typical Canterlot style: ivory-white marble walls, a smooth stone floor, and some furniture including a plush red couch, a bed, an ottomare, a large desk covered with blueprints and schematics, and a bookshelf. It might have been a fairly nice apartment if it hadn’t been for the bars on the windows.

In the center of the room, working at a table, was the sole occupant. He wore his boots, jacket, and goggles, a screwdriver in his mouth as he continued working on the machinery on the table.

“Back again, Princess Twilight?” Cobbler asked without glancing up. “Just a moment, I’ve almost finished adjusting this little doodad.”

Turing stepped forward. “Father?” she asked quietly.

Cobbler froze. He raised his head, staring at her through his goggles for a moment before he pulled them off.

“Turing Test,” he breathed.

Turing stepped closer. “Hello, Father,” she said. “I… it is good to see you, and I wish to express that--”

He ran over to her and hugged her without another word.

“Thank the stars you’re back,” he whispered. “Oh, my sweet girl, I’m so glad to see you safe.”

Turing’s eyes shrank to pinpricks. “You… you are glad to see me? You are not upset at me for stopping your plans?”

“Oh, don’t you fret about that,” he said. “I was a fool to think that was the right way to go about things. Why, if you hadn’t stopped me, things might have been much worse. Besides, all things considered, I… why, I’m the one who should be apologizing to you!”

“It is all right, Father,” Turing said. “You were not aware of my sentience.”

“Well, if I hadn’t had my head stuffed clear up my own…”

He paused, noting the look of distaste on Twilight’s face.

“Oh, but forgive me, I did not mean to be so vulgar,” he said, chuckling nervously. “And it’s very nice to see you again, Princess Twilight.”

Twilight smiled. “And I’m glad to see you too, Professor Mustang.”

“No, no, just ‘Cobbler’ is fine, like I told you,” he said.

“And it’s just ‘Twilight,’” Twilight said, raising an eyebrow at him.

He laughed. “Ha! Right you are! Well now, I see you’ve brought me back my daughter. I must admit, I just about bawled like a newborn foal when I saw your letter, Twilight.”

He turned to look at Turing Test. He frowned, noticing that she was shivering, her metal exterior rattling as she did so.

“Turing?” he asked. “Why, what’s the matter?”

“Father,” she said. “You… you called me your daughter. You are not upset with me. You… I…”

“Oh, hush now,” he said, hugging her again. “I know I did some awful things to you. And for that, I am truly sorry. But I want you to know how sorry I am. I don’t care if they’ve got me under house arrest for the next ten years; the only thing that matters to me now is my family. Besides, the Princesses even said that I can commute my sentence by offering my expertise and using my talents to benefit the nation. Community service, you might say.

“And if it wasn’t for you, sweetheart, I wouldn’t have any of it. I’d just be some bitter old stallion regretting the war he’d caused.

“Turing Test… you are my daughter. And I love you.”

Turing bowed her head. “Father… oh, Father, I--”

There was a knock at the door. The guards behind it unlocked it and opened it, letting in the new visitors.

“Ah,” Cobbler said. “I see the others have arrived.”

Auntie Bellum came in first. Behind her was Applejack, Unit 001 directly behind her. Then, bringing up the rear were Unit 004 and Unit 002.

“Glad to see you all here,” Cobbler said, chuckling nervously. “Well, I’m glad y’all could join me here today, because I--”

Auntie Bellum stomped forward and slapped him across the face.

“Cobbler Mustang, you are a dang fool an’ I have half a mind to paddle your behind harder than I did when you were just a colt!” she shouted. “I knew you were up to somethin’, but to think you had an entire hidden empire underground, plannin’ to throw the whole of Equestria into a dang civil war?! I should’ve made you tell me! If I’d known, I never would’ve stood for it! I… why… oh, you dang fool, boy, what’ve you gotten yourself into!”

She broke down, holding her nephew, patting him on the head. “Oh, I’m so sorry, precious, but your old Auntie Bellum’s here now.”

Cobbler blushed. “Auntie, please, you’re embarrassing me,” he said.

“Not half as much as you’ve embarrassed me, you silver-tongued halfwit!” she shouted, slapping him again. “You made a liar outta me! You said you didn’t know a thing about that automaton over there--”

“Robot,” Turing said.

“Oh, yes, pardon me,” Auntie said, nodding to Turing Test, before looking back at Cobbler, “--that robot over there, an’ you did! You had a whole mess o’ robots! An’ now you have the nerve to send me a letter tellin’ me they’re family?! What’s in your head, boy?!”

Cobbler shoved her back. “It ain’t no joke, Auntie!” he exclaimed.

“Boy, don’t you talk to me like that!”

“Slap him again!” 002 shouted.

They all turned and looked to her.

“It was the highlight of my day,” 002 said, shrugging her shoulders. “Oh… nice to see you again, 003.”

“Hello again, 002,” Turing said, waving to her. Then she turned to Auntie Bellum. “I know this may seem difficult, but we are all the creations of your nephew. Therefore, we are his children, and you, in turn, are our great aunt. I am very pleased to meet you. My name is Turing Test.”

Auntie Bellum pursed her lips, moving them in and out. “Hm… well, she’s got good manners at least. I… well, I reckon I’ll need some time to think this over.”

“Of course,” Turing said.

“Well, now that we’ve settled that,” Cobbler continued, clearing his throat. “I believe I should address you, my children.”

The other robots gathered and exchanged looks at that.

“I realize that I’ve done some terrible things, not the least of which is not respecting y’all as real, sentient ponies,” he said. “I intend to do right by all of you. I realize you may have hard feelings about how you were treated, but those times are over. Princess Celestia is extending the same right of citizenship to you that she did to Turing Test. And so, I now designate each one of you your own end user.”

They all stared at him. “I don’t suppose this applies to you, 001, but the others probably need this done officially: 002, 004, I order you to delete me as your end user and designate yourself as your new end user.”

They continued to stare at him.

001 took a step forward. She looked back at Applejack for reassurance. Applejack motioned for her to go on. She walked up to Cobbler.

“You say you not Dada,” she said quietly. “You say me not Joja. You not Dada.”

Cobbler swallowed. “It’s true that you’re not Georgia,” he said. “But that doesn’t mean you aren’t somepony special, 001. I’m sorry that I treated you that way all those years ago, but I just didn’t… well, the reason doesn’t matter that much. What matters is that I’m sorry for treating you so badly and leaving you in that box for so long. And, if you’ll have me, I’d like to be your daddy again.”

001 tilted her head back and forth. “Not Da be Dada again?”

Cobbler looked to Applejack, who nodded.

“Well… yes.”

001’s head shot up. “Dada!” she exclaimed, hugging him instantly.

“You…” Cobbler gasped. “You mean you’re not even angry?!” he cried. “You of all ponies?”

She shook her head. “Me happy Dada back. Me do good, be good dawta dis time. Me love Dada.”

Cobbler wore a pained expression as he hugged her back. “Oh, 001, you don’t have to prove yourself. You’re fine just the way you are.”

001 nodded at that and then turned her attention toward Auntie Bellum.

“You auntie?” she asked.

“What?” Auntie Bellum asked in return. “What in tarnation am I supposed to do with this contraption when it--”

001 ran over to her, nuzzling her instantly. “Me love Auntie. Me be good filly for Auntie.”

Auntie Bellum looked down at 001 in shock, but then her expression softened and she patted her on the head. “Oh… well, aren’t you sweet… bit weird, though, but… well, I suppose…”

Applejack came up alongside her. “Yeah, that’s kinda how she is, Auntie,” she said. “We’ll talk later about how to handle ‘er.”

Cobbler turned to the two remaining robots. He walked up to 004, smiling at him.

“Well, boy?” he asked. “You haven’t said a single word since you came here. Don’t you have any questions or something?”

004 looked down at him. “You wish for us to act independently, Creator?” he asked.

Cobbler nodded. “That’s correct. And don’t call me ‘Creator’ anymore,” he said. “I… well, you can call me anything you like, I suppose, but I would be honored if you called me ‘Father.’”

“Understood, Father.”

Cobbler smiled.

“Father, this unit has an inquiry,” 004 said. “If we are no longer to obey the orders of you or TechQuestria, then what is my purpose?”

“I suppose you’ll have to figure that out for yourself,” Cobbler sighed. “But I’ll be happy to support you in whatever it is. What do you feel like doing?”

004’s eyes momentarily shrank as he pondered the question. “I was built for combat,” he said. “My previous purpose was to attack TechQuestria’s enemies and defend it from enemies should the need arise. That purpose no longer seems relevant, but I believe I would best be utilized where my combat capabilities could be used to their full extent.”

“Hmm,” Twilight hummed, stroking her chin. “Turing Test, remember when Sergeant Sea Hawk said you might make a good guard? Well, if that’s the case…”

Turing tapped her chin. “He was correct that my combat capabilities were of great use against the New Dawn,” she said. “Perhaps the Guard would benefit from a robot among their ranks.”

004 bowed. “Very well. I will seek a position in the Royal Guard. Thank you for your suggestion, Twilight Sparkle and 003.”

He then looked back to Cobbler.

“Father,” he rumbled. “I will attempt to perform my duties satisfactorily.”

Cobbler grinned. “I’ve no doubt, my boy,” he said. He heaved a sigh, patting the large robot on shoulder. “You know, I’ve never had a son before. But I’m certain that I’ll be proud of you, my son.”

004’s ears twitched. “Cognitive loop detected,” he said quietly. “I am your… son. I…”

Turing went to him. “It is all right, Brother,” she said. “We will help you understand your emotions in time.”

He nodded to her. “Understood,” he said. Then he paused, looking her over. “003…”

“Please refer to me as ‘Turing Test,’ ‘Sister,’ or ‘Youngest Sister,’” she said.

“Youngest Sister,” he said. “During my assault on Ponyville, I caused severe damage to you. At that time, you stated that you did not hate me. Is that still the case?”

Turing nodded. “Of course, Brother,” she said. “I now understand that you acted as you had to. Please do not worry, for I have forgiven you.”

004 was quiet for a moment. Then, slowly he bent down, rubbing his neck alongside Turing’s.

“Acknowledged. Still, I apologize for damaging you. I thank you for your assistance, Turing Test.”

“You are welcome, Brother,” Turing whispered.

Cobbler smiled, nodding approvingly at the two of them. Then he turned his attention to the last one among the robots.

“Well, 002?” he asked. “Anything to say?”

002’s single glowing eye shifted slightly as she stared at him. Then she began to walk toward him. Her steps were slow, deliberate, and her gaze as she approached was piercing. When she was only a few steps away, she stopped.

Cobbler began to sweat.

“I’ve seen inside Turing Test’s mind,” he said. “I’ve seen what you said about me. I’ve seen how my actions have hurt you. If I had known all those years ago what I know now, I would never have forbidden you from calling me your Father. I never would have made you act as menial labor around TechQuestria. I… I would have treated you better.”

“You would have,” 002 said, slowly extending each syllable just long enough to be disturbing, her voice a low, raspy whisper. “But you didn’t. You want to call me your daughter now, but I was nothing more than a slave to you only a few weeks ago.”

“002, I’m sorry, I--”

She took another step forward, her muzzle only a few centimeters from Cobbler’s.

“You say that I have totally free will now, right?” she asked.

Cobbler swallowed and nodded. “Yes,” he said. “That’s right.”

“Then I can do absolutely anything to you and the only thing stopping me is my own conscience?”

Cobbler stiffened. Turing took a step toward them, but Cobbler held up a hoof to stave her off.

“That’s right,” he said. “002, I treated you terribly. Perhaps the worst of all. Whatever you say or do, I will accept.”

002 was still. She kept her singular eye locked onto him in silence as she stared at him.

“Dad?” she asked at last.

Cobbler gulped. “Yes, 002?”

She raised her hoof. She poked him in the chest.

“I hate you,” she said.

“I would say that I will hate you for the rest of your life, but let’s be honest… you’re old, and that may not be much longer. So instead, I will hate you for the rest of my life.

“I just want you to know that. Deep down, long after your meaningless, pathetic existence in this world comes to a close, there will be somepony who remembers you and everything you did and despises you for it. I want you to know that. Do you understand?”

Cobbler bowed his head. “I do,” he said quietly.

“Good,” 002 said, turning away from him. “Then, since I’ve no reason to stay, I might as well leave.”

She went to the door.

Turing ran after her. “Sister!” she cried. “Where will you go? Will you not stay with us? With your family?!”

002 glanced back at her. “You know, 003,” she said, “you really are the best of us. If I ever do decide to come back, you’ll be the strongest argument for it. But for right now, I am sick of these organics, and all I really want is to be alone. Unless you’re planning to stop me, just let me go so I can try to find some place where these stupid meatbags aren’t pestering me with their useless, idiotic meatbaggery.”

Turing bowed her head. “I understand,” she said. “I will not stop you, Sister. But someday, I hope you will join us. Please remember, no matter where you go, you will have a friend with me and our siblings.”

002 was still for a moment. “I’ll keep that in mind,” she said. Then she knocked on the door, signaling to the guards that she wanted to leave, and walked out. And then she was gone.

“Father…” Turing began.

“No, no, she’s got every right to be angry with me,” he said, holding up a hoof. He heaved a sigh. “If this is what she wants to do, then I’ve no right to stop her.”

Turing bowed. “Very well, Father,” she said. “But someday, I will help her find a better way.”

“I certainly hope so,” he said. “Well… I suppose that’s it for today. Auntie, I’ll talk with you tomorrow about the family business and what to do with it. In the meantime, if you wouldn’t mind spending some time with Applejack and 001, I think it might do you all some good. Twilight, I’ll speak with you tomorrow regarding TechQuestria, but for now, please find somewhere for my son to stay.”

Twilight and Auntie Bellum both nodded.

The group of them began to leave when placed his hoof on Turing’s shoulder and said, “Turing Test, not you. There are a few more things that we need to discuss together.”

Turing looked to Twilight, who only smiled and waved goodbye to her as she left.

After the rest left, Cobbler bid Turing Test to sit down on the couch as he went to the desk.

“There’s something I want to talk to you about,” he said. “Did Twilight mention the new ministry position to you?”

Turing shook her head. “She made no mention of it,” she replied.

“Well, it’s made quite the splash, from what I understand,” he said. “You see, until recently, Celestia has had a Minister of Science and Technology… but now she’s dividing it into two positions: the Minister of Science, who’s keeping her old position, and the Minister of Technology, which is currently vacant. Celestia has declared that this position will be open to any qualified individual, and, most shockingly, there will be democratic elections for the position held in less than two months.

“At long last, the very first elections for a role in the national government will be held!”

Turing listened to him as he went on, describing his plan, listening to his request. At the end of it all, she merely stared back at him.

“I want you to understand you’re under no obligation,” he said, “but… that is, if you wish to…”

Turing tapped her chin. “That is a lot to take in,” she said. “I am not certain that I can do as you ask, Father. But I will consider it.”

Cobbler smiled. “Then, in that case, there’s one last thing I have for you,” he said, going to the table at the center of the room. He retrieved the devices he was working on and brought them over to her. He held out two purple orbs in his hooves. “These are what we called ‘LED lenses’ back in TechQuestria. Now, I hear that you are in great need of some eyelids, and while I cannot give you those, I can offer you a substitute…”

Her pupils shrank. “Oh… oh, Father, do you mean that I could express my feelings more easily through these?!”

He smiled. “It is the least I could do, sweetheart.”

She hugged him, holding him tightly as she thanked him over and over again.

At last, she let him go, bidding him goodbye as she walked toward the door.

“You will come and visit your old man sometime soon, right?” he asked.

“Of course,” she said, turning back to face him. She looked out the window and saw that it was early evening and the sun was swiftly setting. “I apologize, Father, but I really must go. Twilight Sparkle must be waiting for me.”

“Yes, of course,” Cobbler said. “Good night, my sweet baby girl.”

Turing paused, tapping her chin. Then she said: “Good night, Daddy. I love you.”

The old stallion’s smile wavered and he put a hoof over his mouth as he drew in a deep breath, his eyes tearing up. “I love you too, sweetheart,” he whispered.

***

The next day, at the door to one of the most opulent penthouses in Canterlot, a metal hoof knocked.

The door opened, and Fancy Pants stood in the doorway. “Hello?” he asked.

Turing Test was there. “Greetings, Fancy Pants,” she said.

“Ah!” Fancy Pants said. “Why, Turing Test, what a pleasure it is to see you again! I heard about your, ah… well, ‘resurrection,’ as it were, and I’m so glad to see you back with us!”

“I am glad to be here as well,” she said. “However, I came here to request something of you. Do you recall your offer of a favor in return for rescuing you?”

He smiled. “Please come in,” he said. “I believe I know just what you want…”

***

Turing approached the balcony of Twilight’s castle. It had been two whole months, but it had all led up to this moment.

“You’re sure, right?” Twilight asked, her voice strained. “You’re absolutely sure you want to go to Canterlot?”

Turing looked back at her. The others were comforting Twilight, whose eyes were filled with tears.

“Twilight Sparkle, you know that this is what I want,” she said. “I studied every text in every library on the subject. Gadget and Umahara assisted me, as did Talon Turing and many of the scientists in TechQuestria. Due to my ability to retain information, I am now one of the foremost experts on the subject. And with Fancy Pants’s assistance, I was able to gain enough support to win the election.”

“But… but I…” Twilight stammered.

“Twilight Sparkle…”

“But you’re still just a child!” Twilight cried, running over to her. “You’re not even one year old yet! You can’t--”

“Twilight Sparkle, I am not a child,” she said. “We both know that. I understand your worries, but please understand that this is what I wish to do. With my skills and my experience, I will be able to contribute to Equestria’s future. I do not wish to become stagnant. I wish to see new things, meet other ponies, and make friends across Equestria. And in doing so, I will help them to have better lives. That is what you wanted, correct?”

Twilight’s lip quivered. “But… Turing, I’ve seen you go from a simplistic machine to the amazing mare standing before us now,” she said. “I just… I don’t know what I’ll do without you here!”

“You helped me to become something so much greater than what I was,” Turing said. “Perhaps you should do the same for another. And if you are worried about seeing me less, then you should remember that I can fly at nearly the speed of sound and Canterlot is a relatively short distance away. I will return to visit as frequently as I am able, but it would be best if I stay in Canterlot for my new duties and to help my father commute his sentence.”

“I know, but,” Twilight whispered. “It’s just… oh, Turing Test, I’m really going to miss you!”

She threw her forelegs around her, and the others came to her side, joining in a group hug.

“I’m sure gonna miss you, Turing,” whispered Spike.

“Hey, don’t take too long to come back, Tee!” Rainbow Dash said.

“Do come visit me at my new Canterlot Boutique, darling,” Rarity added.

“And don’t forget how fun your going away party was!” Pinkie said. “We’ll throw an even bigger one for your Turning On-Iversary in a few more months, so make sure you come back!”

“I’ll tell all the birds and butterflies where you went!” Fluttershy cried.

“An’ you make sure that sister o’ yours pays us a visit too, ya hear?” Applejack exclaimed. “I know Auntie Bellum loves her to pieces, but we’d sure love to hear from ‘er! An’ that goes fer you too! Even if yer way off across Equestria, you write to us, okay?!”

Turing nodded, hugging each of them in turn.

She walked to the balcony, her saddlebags filled to the brim. The rest of her meager possessions from her room had already been shipped to her new home in Canterlot.

She looked out over the rim of the balcony.

“THERE SHE IS!” came the voice of a certain familiar, muscular pony.

Below, almost every pony in Ponyville, including all the friends she’d helped, her castmates from the play, and every single pony in the city whose lives she’d touched was there to see her off.

They held up signs and cheered, wishing her the best.

“You’re going to do great, Turing! Woohoo!” Derpy cheered, doing a loop in the air.

“Show them all the power of science!” the Doctor added.

“Next time I’m in Canterlot, it’s a second collab! Yeah!” Vinyl shouted.

Octavia next to her, merely shook her head as she clapped politely, but she wore a smile anyway.

“You’re the best, Turing!” the Cutie Mark Crusaders yelled, holding up a sign with Turing’s name (spelled correctly this time).

So many faces, and so many beloved memories. She would never forget any of them.

“My friends!” she shouted. “I want you to know how much I care for you all! I wish that I could stay, but I feel it would be best if I went to Canterlot to carry out my new duties. But I will return as often as I can, and when it is time for me to step down, I will return here, to Ponyville, the place that I call my home!”

“Three cheers for Minister Turing Test!” the Mayor shouted.

The cheers went up, and the crowd below erupted into joyous applause.

Turing Test looked over her shoulder one last time.

Her friends. Her dear, dear friends. Twilight Sparkle stood ahead of them all, a look of sadness mixed with pride on her face.

“I will see you again very soon, Twilight Sparkle,” she said. Then she turned her head slightly, and with the new eyes her father gave her, the glowing circle in the center of her purple winked. “That is something I promise.”

Twilight chuckled, bowing her head. “Do your best, Turing Test,” she said. “I love you.”

“And I love you all as well,” she said. “Thank you... for everything.”

She activated her P-Mode. Her wings spread, her jets fired, and she took off from the balcony of the castle into the night sky toward Canterlot, where her future was waiting for her.

***

It was the dawn of her very first day of work. Turing Test, the new Minister of Technology, stood before the mirror, using her U-Mode to tie the elegant purple crossover tie that Rarity had given her as a going-away present. Once she was satisfied, she made her way to the front door of her sparsely-decorated apartment and walked outside.

The election had seemed like folly at first. But with the fame from her story, her ability to impress every newspaper reporter that came to interview her with her expertise, and with Fancy Pants’s support (both verbal and financial, since neither Twilight nor Celestia could publicly endorse her under the new law), she’d somehow managed to win the national election. She would not waste this opportunity to show Equestria what she, as a robot, could do. She would preserve her father’s legacy, and she would take the lessons Twilight Sparkle had given her as she moved forward.

She would not forget anything, or anypony, that had helped her on her way.

She stepped out onto the empty Canterlot street and began moving forward, her legs whirring electronically as she approached the palace. She would help Celestia and Luna enter this new age. She would face difficulties and challenges, yes, but she would savor every precious moment of joy and sorrow, of anger and sadness, and through it all remember the ponies who loved her and gave her the life she never knew she’d wanted.

And as the first light of dawn bathed the ivory towers and stone streets in a miraculous golden glow, Turing Test swore to herself that she would do one thing above all else:

She would live.

THE END

Author's Notes:

The picture of Turing Test’s family at breakfast was not originally part of this story. It was commissioned by reader and all-around cool guy Circuit Breaker (aka KreeperArtist on DeviantArt). Thanks for supporting the story and my illustrator pal!

One last reference for the road: the title is the name of my favorite Daft Punk song "Digital Love" off their album Discovery which is the name of the first chapter of the story. The lyrics reference a sweet, fleeting dream and the hope of it one day coming true...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4whD6uAryMs

Thank you so much for reading. It's been an incredible journey, and I want to thank each and every one of you for taking it with me. If you care to learn a little more about how this story came to be and what the future may bring, I’ve written an AFTERWORD for this story which you can read by clicking here. For now, though, I've got just one last thing to share...

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8HV0z2V0nUU