I'm a Wingpony?

by Ryvaken

First published

What if Rainbow Dash had been someone else's wingpony?

Rainbow Dash couldn't believe her eyes. She was a wingpony? How did that make sense? And that's not all. Lightning Dust, probably the only cadet that could actually keep up with her, was also a wingpony? What the hay is going on here?


This story revisits Season 3, Episode 7 and pairs Rainbow with a different pony, for a different reason.


Released as part of Operation Open Bin, wherein every stupid idea I've ever had was submitted at once.

First Steps

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To say Rainbow Dash was a morning pony would be to insult the concept of Honesty so much that Applejack would be found hugging one of her trees and crying into its leaves for at least an hour afterwards. Despite this, Rainbow didn't have a problem rolling onto her hooves that morning. She was at the Wonderbolt Academy. She was actually flying in the same sky as real Wonderbolts. The same Wonderbolts who were evaluating her to join them. The Academy's cloud could have been formed from coffee vapor for all the energy Rainbow had. This was no time for napping, sleeping in, or even resting her eyes!


In distant Canterlot, three more hairline cracks appeared on Discord's statue. These were instantly noted and reported to the Princesses, who hatched a scheme to reform the avatar of chaos before his inevitable escape. "Sister, we think thy plan is insanity! Yet, its madness may well increase its efficacy!"


Their first day had been a good one. Lightning Dust was good competition. Most ponies couldn't hope to keep up with her, let alone do so without breaking a sweat. And the stunt she pulled on the Dizitron was just cool. She'd make a good wing pony, but really Rainbow hoped she was another lead pony. Good competition was going to be hard to come by.

Rainbow strutted into the mess with the kind of confidence normally associated with dreams involving Mare Do Well and sweet sweet pay back. She quickly checked herself -- fantasies were all well and good but she needed to keep her eye on the prize. Spitfire didn't need another arrogant pegasus strutting her stuff, she needed a Wonderbolt. Rainbow schooled her expression into something she figured was close to professional and walked up to the assignment board with only half a strut.

A crowd of pegasi kept Rainbow from seeing the board, so she waved down a couple mares walking away. "Hey, did you see which lucky pony gets to be my wingpony?" she asked.

The mares glanced at eachother and giggled. Rainbow raised an eyebrow and ran her question through her head. Nope, sounded good. "What's the matter?" she asked.

"Uhh, you might wanna check the wall," the purple pegasus said. She grinned at some private joke.

Now, it was commonly believed that Rainbow Dash was a dumb jock. It was part of the whole awesome, not-an-egghead image she cultivated. She didn't have a lot of use for books (something she had learned to regret) but there were times that she needed to remind ponies that an idiot doesn't head up the weather department of a town. Something was wrong about her wingpony, something wrong enough that it was memorable and funny enough to provoke giggles at socially inappropriate moments.

This could not possibly be good for Rainbow Dash.

Rainbow trotted over to the wall and nudged her way through the ring of pegasi. Lightning Dust was closest to the board, unmoving. Weird, but probably not relevant. Rainbow scanned the board for her name and found, as Rarity would put it, The Worst Possible Thing.

"I'm a wing pony?" she asked weakly.

"You too?" Lightning Dust asked. Rainbow actually flinched at the energetic mare's defeated tone.

Rainbow scanned the board again. "Bulk Biceps?" She offered Lightning Dust a shaky grin. "He's a good pony. Not the fastest flier, but the guy's a tank."

"Great," Lightning Dust offered lamely.

Rainbow glanced again at her own name, and the name next to it. "I just wonder who this 'Cloudweaver' guy is."

Rainbow got her answer in the form of a stallion walking up behind her. "That would be me," he said.

Rainbow turned around and took in her -- sigh -- lead pony. His coat was a boring tan that offset an electric blue mane that he had probably never spent a day in his life caring for. His eyes were green, which against his tan fur appeared much deeper and darker than they actually were. The academy uniform hid most everything else, except his cutie mark. It was recognizable as a cloud, but it was stretched and wove in and out of itself in a weird, seven pointed not-quite-a-star that made Rainbow's eyes hurt to follow. "You?" she asked incredulously. "You didn't even recover from the Dizitron! How did you make lead pony?"

Cloud Weaver grinned.


Weaver watched pony after pony go onto the Dizitron. Following the crazy machine at speed was futile, but each time there was a second or so when it had to get up to speed, and longer while it reset. The gear ratio only changed for Lightning Dust's little stunt.

"Cloud Weaver!" Spitfire roared. "You're up!"

"Yes ma'am," Weaver said confidently. He flew up, grabbed the bar, lowered his hooves, and then did the insane. He closed his eyes.

The machine moved....moved...okay that was really a lot of motion..."Release!" Spitfire barked.

Weaver spun into the sky, flaring one wing. He tumbled out of control, flailed his hooves wildly, and bucked a cloud. He was so out of it that his magic forced the cloud to rebound him like a trampoline, shooting him at the ground. It was all he could do to flip himself over, flare his wings, and land on all four hooves without breaking anything.

"Nine seconds," Spitfire barked. Cloud Weaver finally opened his eyes and walked back to the line.


"Recovery takes time," Weaver explained. "You have to kill your speed and then accelerate in a different direction. It's loads easier to use the momentum you have."

"You lucked out," Rainbow argued. "There's no way you could tell where that cloud was going to bounce you. Your eyes weren't even open!"

"Of course they weren't," Weaver said calmly. "That would have just made me dizzy. I figured out where all the clouds were before I ever got on the Dizitron. After that it was just a matter of keeping track of which direction I was going in."

"Keep track?" Rainbow scoffed. "Even I couldn't keep my head straight on that thing. How'd you pull it off?"

"I didn't try to," Weaver said smugly. "I just counted the rotations. I couldn't feel it," he flicked an ear, "but that doesn't mean I couldn't know it." He tapped his head.

"Yeah right," Rainbow scoffed. "I still say you lucked out."

"I guess you'll have a chance to see for yourself," Weaver said. "We'll be flying together for a while."

Rainbow grimaced. "Yeah," she said again, more subdued. "Right."


Spitfire didn't look up as Rainbow entered her office. She had, sadly, expected this conversation. "What is it, Rainbow Dash?"

"I had the best time on the Dizitron," Rainbow complained. "Only six seconds!"

I know, I was there. Spitfire kept her focus on her paperwork. "And?"

"And you made me a wing pony," Rainbow continued.

Spitfire took a moment to take off her aviator glasses, fold them, and set them aside. Finally she looked at Rainbow. "Yes," she said. "I did."

"Why?" Rainbow asked, her voice climbing up a register.

"An interesting question," Spitfire said evenly. "Why do you think?"

Rainbow opened her mouth to speak before she realized she had nothing to say. She closed her muzzle, her teeth clicking on each other, and took a moment to think. As irritating as Spitfire's disinterest had been, Rainbow found that it was much worse being stared at while she stood there stupidly. "I don't know, ma'am," she admitted.

Spitfire blinked once and quashed the urge to smile. She's gone off script. Good for her. "Cadet, what is the role of a wing pony?"

Rainbow shied back from her desk. "To follow the lead pony, ma'am."

"Why?" Spitfire asked, leaning forward.

Rainbow's eyes danced around. "Because...because that's why the wing pony is there?"

"Is that a question?" Spitfire growled.

Rainbow kept her mouth shut this time and took a breath. "No ma'am. I hadn't actually thought about the question, ma'am."

Spitfire didn't stop her smile this time. "Good. It's good that you realize that. Until you can tell me why you're a wing pony, you're not ready to be a lead pony."

Rainbow sagged. "I don't understand," she said.

Spitfire nodded. "Figure it out, recruit. Dismissed."

Spitfire watched Rainbow walk off. Her tail was dragging on the cloud and her head sagged almost to her withers. Spitfire sighed once the door was closed. "Lightning Dust and Rainbow Dash, huh?" she asked the empty office.