One is All, and All is One

by Midnight Tales

First published

[A Displaced Fic] A man dressed as Edward Elric "The Fullmetal Alchemist" gets thrown through the void into Equestria along with the power of transmutation.

Heard any of the stories of people disappearing from the middle of convention inside a crowded room with hundreds of eyes watching them fall through a portal or in a flash of light. Well guess who joined the club!

Well now I'm stuck as a statue of the garden of two technicolor pony princesses because they don't like strange being landing in the middle of their magical pony gala and giving them a middle-finger-salute before running away.



I'm not sure if they know what that was anyway...

Rated teen for strong language and other future things like violence or very crude humor. Early chapters rated terrible for bad writing and poor grammar I can't find

UNDERGOING REWRITE DUE TO CURED STUPID

A Displaced Story
[Fullmetal Alchemist]

OPEN TO CROSSOVERS
PM if interested

Crossovers:
Gravity of the Situation by DJSkywalker

Featured:
8/3/15
15/3/15
22/3/15

Chapter 1 - Shortness

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"There comes a day where you find a way to escape"

You know what I hate about being petrified in stone for over a millennium? Nothing at all. You know what I hate about being stuck next to a god of chaos? Everything. Especially when he wants to talk non-stop the most of the time. You should also know the fun fact that when you are petrified you usually are void of sorts and even then you are asleep unless you are forced to be awake for the whole time. Luckily for me Discord decided to keep me awake for every single second of it because he wanted someone to talk with, but honestly the second part is that I can now see, feel and hear everything that happens around me.

Now you maybe wondering what could possibly be worst than feeling every bird shit and the pain from annoying kids knocking me off my pedestal. The answer is Discord's bicentennial one week karaoke marathon. Do you know the definition of insanity? Because I do. It's called "The Song that Never Ends" and he sings it for a week.

Ooh looks like we have company O'buddy of mine! Now no more monologuing while the nice mare tells these foals of my wonderful chaos I don't want to miss a single bit.

Fine...

"I want to start our field trip here, in the world-famous Canterlot sculpture garden. That one over there represents friendship. All right, my little ponies, this one represents victory." a fuchsia mare said, a group of kids following behind.

blah, blah, blah, friendship this, harmony that, get onto me already.

Just shut up already Discord

"...Girls! Now this is a really interesting statue. What do you notice about it?" the mare said gesturing towards me.

"It's got a weird claws!" "It's got a spear!" "It's really short!"

ARE YOU KIDDING ME!? OF ALL THE THINGS YOU COULD PICK! I'M ALMOST AS TALL AS THE PRINCESSES!

Now, now Edward, language, they're foals after all

"This creature is called an Alchemist. It's body is similar to a minotaur, but has no hair on its body or horns and has an arm and leg made of metal. What do you suppose that represents?"

"Strangeness!" "Fighting!" "Shortness!"

REALLY!? SHORTNESS!? STRANGENESS I CAN UNDERSTAND BUT SERIOUSLY!?

"Actually this statue represents Equivalent Exchange, which means nothing can be achieved without something of equal value given in return." The school teacher explained.

Okay I'm actually sort of surprised, the princesses actually listened to me, when I was talking about alchemy.

"And right here is "Discord", which means a lack of harmony between ponies, and since you three have demonstrated discord for us so well you're each going to write me an essay explaining it." she said as the rest of the kids laughed at the three. "Now let's go, and I don't want anymore fighting."

WHAT!? No stories about my chessboard grass? No even a word about the chaos capital of the world I built by myself!?



Resounding cracks rang out from Discord's statue as the group had moved on towards more of the garden.

Oh is my time up already?

I watched as cracks formed across Discord's body before it shattered in a flash of light leaving the draconequus stretching his back "Oh its so great to be back!"

Discord you wouldn't leave your old pal behind would you?

He turned towards me "Oh I wouldn't dream of it." he said conjuring a chisel and hammer from thin air before marching towards me with a sly grin.

Really Discord?

"What? Your right what was I thinking with these it would take forever!" he said throwing it away as a construction helmet appeared on his head and sledgehammer in his claws giving it a few practice swings. "I'll have you out in no time at all!". he smiled widely before swinging it straight at my head with an explosion of light.

"WAIT! STOP!" I said moving my hands in front of my face. Wait... I moved? "Huh? but you-".

"Oh really now do you think I would do something you would expect me to do? I just wanted to have a little fun before I go." he said smugly before walking off. "Now I'd love to stay and chat some more but I have some Princesses to annoy and a chaos capital to rebuild. Adios!" he said teleporting away.

I stood there for a moment before realizing what he had said "Well I can't let the Princesses know I'm gone yet" I said jumping off my pedestal and putting my things on the ground. Turning back the pedestal I grabbed a piece of chalk from my pocket and began drawing on the stone.

Why didn't I learn to-do circle-less transmutations again?


~1,500 Years Ago~

"COME BACK FOUL TARTARUS SPAWN AND FACE THE WRATH OF THE PRINCESS OF THE NIGHT!!!"

The Royal Canterlot Voice rang out over the forest sending animals running out from their homes and away from their hunt. A shadow passed overhead along with a large gust of wind signalling that Luna was getting closer to my hiding spot.

"THOU CANNOT HIDE VILLAIN WE SHALL FIND YOU AND DRAG THOU BACK TO TARTARUS OURSELF IF WE MUST"

All I did was use alchemy to fix an earth ponies wagon for him, Why is that a crime?

The beat of her wings sounded far into the distance before I came out of from underneath a bush, sighing in relief when I could no longer hear her from the distance.

"We told thee~" A light voice whispered from the tree above followed by a dull thump of hooves on dirt "Thou cannot hide from us".

shit...


Ah, the running and hiding thing. That's right.

I stood back from my work before slamming my hands into the circle. light shone from the chalk borders as rock began to rise up out from the base for a few seconds before finishing. As I stood back up I saw a perfect stone replica of me stood in my place on top of the pedestal standing like I had for the past one and a half thousand years or so.

Making sure there we no signs of alchemy being used left on the statue I picked up my things and headed through the gardens narrowly avoiding three arguing fillies.


ARE THESE PONIES SERIOUSLY DUMB ENOUGH TO FALL FOR THE SAME TRICK FOUR TIMES IN A ROW!?

The only way out I could find without going through the castle itself was past the Royal Guard training field which despite what I had initially thought was going to be hard ended up just being a game of see how many guards I can trick into investigating a strange sound or knock out with a rock from across the field. At the moment I have tricked the same group of guards into chasing after a rock thrown behind them.

"It's over here!" A guard yelled before charging towards the wall.

Do they even train these guys? I mean seriously, Is this the reason the Princesses found me? Because their guards were too incompetent to?

After the sixth time they fell for the trick I decided to sneak pass and break into their barracks, liberating a pack and a few small bags full of golden coins before heading out towards the far wall. Using alchemy to make an tunnel and escaped. But not before hearing the satisfying sound of a angry blue princess using the Royal Canterlot Voice one last time before sealing the tunnel in the wall.

"DISCORD!!!"

Chapter 2 - The Forest

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"I'll go to a world that I still havent seen"

I believe I may have gotten ahead of myself and haven't really explained why I am in ponyland, why I am my favourite anime character and why I got turned to stone for a thousand years. So I might as well start at the very beginning. Well the story starts about 1,500 years ago at an anime convention.


~1,500 Years Ago - Los Angeles Anime Expo~

It was the second day of the expo and I was psych'd for it. I had made the perfect cos-play of Edward Elric, I had my hair dyed and braided, the red coat, even fake plastic automail. This was my first con so I didn't really know what there was to do around here so I ended up just wandering around, taking photos with cos-players and looking through the countless stalls of merchandise.

That's when I saw it. A state alchemist pocket watch along with a set of metal automail sitting in a display-case with a whole bunch of other signature items from other anime and TV shows. I Just had to have it I mean seriously, how fucking badass would it be to have a replica set of Edward's automail actually made of metal. I noticed the guy running the stall was cos-playing as the Merchant from Resident Evil 4, like I mean this guy genuinely looked like him even down to the way he was carrying himself.

He turned towards me "Got some rare things on sale... stranger"

This guy is way too into this if he even sounds like him

"How much for the automail set and the pocket watch?" I pointed over at the display-case waiting for his likely one-of-a-kind sales pitch about them.

"Those? Well for the watch a measly sixty bucks. The whole set will bring you to two-hundred and eighty and I'll even throw this book for free since you are buying the whole set " he said grabbing a leather book from under the stall.

"Alphonse Elric's Complete Guide to the Transmutational Arts"? Must be official merchandise or something...

"You have got yourself a deal" I said taking out my wallet. Pulling out the money before passing it over to the man.

Oh man I can't wait to get this on!

"Come back anytime..." he said slyly passing me my purchases.

I walked off to find somewhere to add my new items to my cos-play on. after about 20 minutes I finally found a bench in one of the hallways before sitting down to attach the leg first which comes on with ease but was a little tight when the completely fastened before putting on the arm. looking over myself a couple of times to see how well everything now fit.

This is so fucking badass...

I grabbed my pocket watch and book off from the bench before noticing a bright light from underneath me, everything had gone quiet. A Portal of Truth had sprung up below me, dark phantom hands grasped at my legs pulling me down in to the floor of the hallway, people watching as I slowly descended, screaming most of the way down. I wasn't exactly proud of my last thoughts before blacking out either.

Who the hell drew the transmutation circle?


~1,500 Years Ago - Everfree Forest~

I groaned as I came to, lifting my head to look around "What the fuck just happened..." I said watching the edge of the dark clearing I found myself in.

Why do I sound like that?

Standing up to look around I noticed my leg must have fallen asleep when I had passed out. Sitting back down I began trying to find the clasp on the automail in the dark thinking getting some circulation back in my leg might help "Why isn't the clasp there..." I started to say before noticing the base of the leg was fixed to my waist.

"W-what? No... No fucking way" I started to panic "This can't be happening... Limbs don't just disappear" I started to pull the leg off but it didn't budge.

Okay... Deep breaths... This is.. all a dream... This has to be one

After I had calmed down a bit I checked to see if my arm had been replaced too. Turns out it had. That's not the only thing that had changed either, my automail had become completely functional as well my costume had become a lot more realistic and I had become... Shorter, I mean seriously I was decent 6 feet 2 inches before, now I'm about 4 feet.

I went about getting everything together before starting to wander through the forest hoping I might be able to find anything leading back to actual civilisation, figure out what happened to me and get a refund from that freaking merchant guy.

~3 Hours Later~

I had pretty much given up by then, there wasn't any sign of man-made landmarks, no roads, no planes flying overhead, not even the sound of a city nearby. I just sat down on a log in a small clearing to take a rest. While I waited I tried attempting alchemy. Turns out I couldn't just clap my hands together and begin the process of transmutation like Edward does in the anime, Nope it seems I have to draw the circles for the time being for some reason. Also interesting enough the Alphonse's guide didn't seem to mention that you have to control the speed of transmutations.

I learned that the hard way. So the fun fact of the day kids is that tree's, can in fact. Explode.

A dim ringing filled my ears as tree bark and other debris fell down all around me like rain in a storm.

A harsh coughing woke me from my daze "Is somepony there?" A deep voice called out.

I swear if I find a town on the other side of this tree line I will lose it

I got up and started walking through the bush where the voice had come from "I am so sorry about the explosion, but you do not know how happy I am to find another person out in the forest" I laughed as I passed through the last piece of scrub "Uhh I'm really sorry if I scared you with that explosion I've been trying to find some way to lead me back to civilization for hours now".

I walked on to a dirt road with an old-looking cart off to the side. A figure kneeling down next to the side of the wagon inspecting the wheel.

Wait did he say somepony before?

I heard a small sigh from the cart as I approached "Well I'll forget about that if you can help me fix this darn thing, and I'd be more than happy to lead you to the nearest town if you need" the figure said.

"Deal" I said leaning up against the side of the cart "So what's the problem you need help with?" I asked.

The figure got up and walked into the moonlight wiping the dust from his side "The bucking axle snapped straight through the centre" he started before looking at me for the first time.

Standing in front of me was a small technicolor horse staring straight at me with a dull smile on his face "You a tall one ain't ya".

I'm done...

Frankly my brain had enough bullshit for one day and decided to leave him with one last thing before passing out on the ground. "Why the fuck are you blue?".

Chapter 3 - Truth

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"Is that silhouette the Devil?"

Have you ever gotten that strange feeling of impending doom? Or that someone is watching you just outside the corner of your vision? Maybe even that feeling that you can't remember anything that just happened? Well I'm getting all of those feelings at the moment.

An empty void of endless white appeared in my vision. Absolutely nothing around me, even the ground was this discerning colour of white which blended seamlessly into the background. That feeling that someone was watching me slowly left as I turned in circles trying to spot anything that could give me a clue to where I was and what happened.

"Hello?" I said, echoing for what seemed like hours.

"Hmm? What's this?".

And the feeling returns ten-fold... A cold chill rushed down my back as the voice echoed around me. A dark, foreboding quality hung on each syllable spoken in a child-like glee.

"Interesting...".

"Who's t-there?" I asked with a shudder as the feeling grew.

"Who am I hmm? Maybe what am I? Or perhaps you mean to ask my name?".

The voice asked sending a further chill through me as it came from behind me.

I turned quickly to find nothing but the empty white of the void "A name would be nice..." I said as I closed my eyes trying to calm myself.

"Well, I am called by may names, I am the World, I am the Universe, I am God, I am Truth, I am All, I am One and I am also... You~".

A figure of white surrounded in flecks of pure darkness sat cross-legged in front of me as I opened my eyes, a broad glee-filled smile on its face.

"How about I just call you Truth for now..." I said frozen in place as I watched the figure stood up slowly "My Name is... I guess you can call me Edward now..." Truth smiled as I finished.

"So what is it you wish to know?".

"What?" I said dumbfounded at what Truth said, what do I want to know?.

"You have paid in advance for knowledge yes? So now I can grant you any knowledge you so desire~".

"What do you mean I have paid?" I asked confused as Truth's smiled only grew larger.

"Why with these of course~".

Truth slowly stepped towards me, flecks of the darkness slowly turned inwards and became flesh, bone and skin with each step flowing from one of his legs and arms until they stopped.

Are t-those mine?.

"When you arrived through the portal these were given to me, but until you entered my domain I could not grant you the knowledge in exchange".

"So I can ask for any knowledge? Anything at all?".

"Yes... I can grant any knowledge about any subject even those that do not exist yet".

Truth looked behind me for a moment before his smiled vanished as faster than it had appeared. I turned to see what had upset him only to find nothing before looking back at Truth.

"It seems our time is up for now...".

Truth turned and walked away fading into the background as he did.

"Should you ever need to find me Edward you need only summon me with a simple transmutation circle..."


"WAKE UP ALREADY!" A sudden gruff voice yelled in my ear.

"ARGH!" I did not scream no matter what you think as I launched myself up from the ground onto my feet.

"Took your time waking up..." the voice said again behind me.

I jumped around only to meet with the tiny blue horse from before, strangely enough I began feeling light-headed.

"HEY! No more fainting!" it said pulling me down to his level before slapping me in the face as it held me by the neck with one of his... hooves?

"Ow! Alright! I get it!" I yelled holding my face.

"Good, now how about we introduce ourselves before you even think about screaming like a little filly and fainting again hmm?" he said with a smug grin.

How can a horse even smile like that... It's so creepy

"Fine... just no more slapping..." I said quietly as I rubbed my face as it bruised, I offered my free hand out to him "My name is... Edward Elric".

"My name is Millstone" he said shaking my hand with his hoof "Now we got that outta the way, how about you help me with my cart now eh?" he said as he walked away.

I examined him as he began taking off one of the wheels of the cart. He had a dirty brown mane cut exactly like a normal horse, what looked like a tattoo of an angled stone wheel with a cross-shaped metal piece running through the centre sat on either side of his ass.

Wait... Millstone? Like those things that grind up wheat?

I sat beside him as he inspected the axle of the cart "You don't got any experience on fixing this sort of thing do ya?".

I shook my said "Not exactly... But I can try something that might work..." I said unsure, thinking back to the exploding tree.

He dropped the wheel on the ground turning to me "Being stuck out here fer the night can't be better than an alternative can it?" .

I breathed out a couple of times before answering "Just stand back as I do this okay?" I dropping to my knees and started drawing.

"Whatever gets it done..." he said walking over to the other side of the road.

~5 minutes later~

I think it's done... I hope... I thought before slamming my hands to the ground before me. A bright glow erupted from the ground, sparks of energy flashed around every few seconds as the wood from the cart began to gently flow towards the cracked axle like water.

Come on... Steady... No explosions...

Behind me Millstone sat, his jaw on the ground as he watched as the circle dulled in energy, the wood stopped moving I removed my hands from the ground and inspected my handiwork.

Not a single crack left... Good

I clapped my hands of the dust and turned towards Millstone, his jaw and eyes were wide open as he watched me in what I think was both amazement and fear as his cart had fixed itself before him

A few seconds passed before he trotted around me over to the cart and looked over his cart in silence. Without turning his gaze from the cart he asked quietly "What in Tartarus are you?".

I smiled widely before looking at him "My name is Edward Elric, and I am The Fullmetal Alchemist!".

Feels so cool saying that!

As I was enjoying my little fangasm over that little moment oblivious to anything else Millstone started attaching himself up to his cart.

*Whack* A blue hoof came out of no where and hit me across the face.

"Ow! What the hell was that for!" I yelled as I looked down at Millstone who was smiling at me still holding his hoof in the air preparing to hit me again any second.

"That was to get your attention" he said lowering his hoof to the ground before trotting away "Now come on I said I was going take you to town and I ain't waiting for you".

"Alright I'm coming" I said walking up beside him.


~20 minutes later~

We ended up talking about a range of things on the way to town and from what I now know, Millstone isn't a horse, but a pony, I'm in a place known as Terra or specifically, Equestria, which is the pony kingdom. There are other species out there from different mythologies on earth like unicorns, pegasi, minotuars, griffons and dragons.

The biggest thing is probably when he asked how did I use magic, apparently only some creatures can use magic on this world. Insane right? Also if it not sapient, stay the fuck away from it because most of them are deadly such as the cockatrice which is the bastard son of a chicken and a snake which will turn you to stone.

As we entered the town I attracted a few strange looks which I pretty much expected since they haven't really seen anything like me before.

"So Millstone..." I said getting his attention for a moment "Know anywhere I can get a place to stay?".

"How much you willing to spend?".

Shit... Don't really think they would accept credit would they...

I started scratching my neck absent-mindedly "I don't exactly have any money to pay...".

He stopped and looked at me like I had grown two heads for a second before moving on and contemplating about something. After a few minutes he spoke up again "If your willing to do some farm work for a warm bed and food I'll be willing to let you stay with us fer a few nights".

"Can't say I've worked on a farm before but I can't be that bad right?"

Millstone started trotting down the road laughing non-stop, when I asked him what was so funny he only laughed louder.

When we reached his farm we started unloading his cart into the barn before heading up to his homestead to introduce me to his family.

"Now I'm going to go in first just to prepared them okay? So just stay out here" he said stopping at the door before heading inside. After a few minutes I heard Millstone talking to his family before asking me to enter.

As soon as I entered I heard a few gasps before seeing two kid ponies gallop behind another pony who was suddenly wielding a very large frying pan.

"Woah now y'all this is Mister Elric, now he'll be staying with us fer a few days" Millstone interrupted before anything could happen. The two kids were a lot more interested after that.

"S'cuse me Mister Elric?" One of the kids asked, he was about half Millstone's height and was a yellowish-brown with a brown mane.

"Yes... umm?"I began to ask before remembering I didn't even know their names. Luckily he noticed.

"Golden Russet sir" he said smiling before realizing he hadn't asked his question yet "What exactly are ya?".

I smiled lightly before answering "I'm a human, now how about you introduce me to the rest of your family hmm?".

He nodded quickly before he pushed the other kid from under Millstone's legs towards me "This is my lil' sister Melrose" he then went and started pushing Millstone's wife towards me.

"My name is Honeygold, thank ya for help my husband with the cart" She said smiling at me "How about we settle down and have some supper hmm?"

The rest of the night went by quickly as the kids went straight to bed despite wanting to ask me more questions.

Millstone led me to a spare room in the attic after saying goodnight to his kids "Well it isn't much but it will do fine Millstone" I said tried

"No problem, now best not stay up too late, our day starts at sun rise and no later so I expect you will be up and ready by then" he said before turning to return downstairs "And if you ain't I'll up, wake you up myself...".

I will say this once... Hoof slaps. Fucking. Hurt. So with that fact I was suddenly very tired.

Chapter 4 - Family

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"I welcome friends and foes"

Over the week I had gotten pretty close to Millstone's family, when I had explained how I got here I fell apart when I realised that I couldn't go home or see my family again. Night-time goes by quickly when you spend most of it crying, anyway the next day went by as a blur. That night they brought me into the lounge room and all but forced me to be a part of their family, no need to say but I cried differently that night.

Each night I would sneak out of the homestead and head out to the nearby creek to practice alchemy ever since Millstone made me swear not to use it near anyone or tell anyone since some might think it is dark magic or something. I practised transmuting stone into metal and vice versa as well as making some transmutation circles on items as a quick way to use alchemy in case I ever needed to use it.

Another few things happened as well, with me helping out around the farm doing repairs, helping the bring in the harvest and strange gold nuggets that Melrose found in the creek, they could afford a lot more luxuries, including an actual bed for me.

Sadly not all good things last...


I had been clearing out the barn when a hole opened above me, I mean seriously there is no other way to describe what it is, It's a hole about 2 feet across and pure black, well more like... the colour of space, like no light can escape it at all and has wisps of energy flowing around the outside of it like smoke.

After two minutes of nothing happening I decided to experiment with it.

Note to self. Don't touch hole with anything. Ever. Unless you want to lose it, then by all means go for it and poke it to your heart's content.

I was staring at the end of a rake I used to poke the hole, well what was left of it. In a matter of seconds the metal bent and grew rust and the wood aged and exploded.

Shit! Millstone will kill me if I don't fix this!

Before I could do anything else something fell from the hole into a stack of hay. Digging around I found fist sized diamond perfectly cut just sitting there, after staring for a moment I moved my finger towards it slowly with my eyes closed while chanting a mantra in my head over and over again hastily.

Don't explode. Don't explode. Don't explode. Don't explode. Do anything but explode...

I could feel a thrum of energy flow from it into my head as it surged through the tips of my finger.

"I am the protector of the innocent, warrior of the weak, call upon me for assistance and I shall come. Call for the Gravity Shifter and I will make those who harm others beg for mercy as they are crushed at my feet. Hold this gem close to thine heart and I shall be at your side as a fellow warrior!"

I Stared blankly at the diamond as the call echoed in my mind as the energy drained back into the gem before I spoke "What the fuck was that? You know what? Nothing could surprise me anymore".

Thinking back on that now, I probably should have said nothing at all.

A light flashed above me as items began falling from the hole, each popping out at random intervals.

After a minute the hole closed up leaving a small assortment of items on the floor of the barn "Well... I guess I was wrong...".

I walked over and went through each of the items one by one listening to the messages, some where downright scary, anyway the most impressive of them has to be Nemesis, I mean this guy was a one man army that could take any hit you give him in Resident Evil.

This Gilgamesh guy also sounded pretty badass too, but I didn't exactly need anyone to help me in any fights at the moment.

"Where the hell am I going to put this stuff?" I said as I placed them my pockets.

"I know where~"

*FLASH*


*Thump*

I groaned as I lifted myself up off my face, why the face?

"Hello Edward~".

Blinking a few things as I looked up I saw Truth sitting down with what had to be the biggest shit eating grin plastered on his face.

I slowly got to my feet taking a few breaths before talking "I going to take a wild guess and say that was you, wasn't it" I coughed still winded from the fall with as sarcasm as I could.

"Correct young Alchemist".

"Right... Anyway, you said you knew some where I could put these?" I said fishing out a glowing blue cube.

Truth was suddenly in front of me holding the item in his grasp tightly "Don't even want to know what these are first?" he questioned.

Looking at him as he inspected the cube by prodding at the sides "Not really I just want some place to put them for now okay?".

Truth looked almost outright offended by what I said as he clutched the cube a little closer "These items as you call them are massive amounts of energy condensed into metaphysical objects like this! I don't even know what these are!" he responded holding the cube in my face.

"As interesting as that is I don't think I'm going to need those any time soon okay?" I said pushing his hand out of my view "How about you hold on to them for me for know and you can experiment as much as you like and find out all about them hmm?" As I asked a smile slowly replaced his distraught look.

"I am not blind Alchemist, tell what is it you want to know in return I won't be indebted to you anymore than I already am".

Damn... I thought I got him...

"You thought wrong~" he smiled widely at my terrified look "That's right Edward, I can hear every little thing you think when you are in my realm, unlike last time we stood in your mind, but now we are in my realm and I make the rules".

"Fine just take the damn things and stay out of my head okay?" I said grabbing the rest of the items and holding them out Truth before pulling them out of reach as soon as he moved towards them "...But I want to know what you learn from them too..." I smiled.

"Very well Alchemist, you shall have your knowledge~" he smiled back.

"Yeah whatever... wait how did I get here anyway?" I asked looking at Truth.

"I can summon you just as you can summon me Edward~"

*FLASH*


*Thump*

"Fuck... you... Truth..." I mumbled into the ground grinding my teeth back and forth as I did.

"WHAT IN THE NAME OF CELESTIA WAS THAT!" a voice yelled behind me.

Standing up quickly I faced three unicorns in ornate golden armor pointing their spears straight at me standing in the entrance of the barn with Millstone behind them with a look of fear on his face.

"Shit..." I muttered thinking back to what Millstone had said about others see shit like this.

One of the unicorns stepped forward with a look of rashness and fear "Creature! In the name of the Princesses I command you to come with us" he stuttered as his horn glistened in a aura of yellow as his spear floated from his side.

The look on Millstone's face said it all, fear, sadness and indignation.

I was motionless as I tried to think of something that could end this and not cause Millstone or his family... my family any trouble.

"Come with us and you will be treated fairly..." the unicorn said uneasily as he inched closer.

"Run!" Truth howled in the back of my mind.

I slowly placed one of my hands out of their sight and into my pocket grabbing what I needed to escape.

I noticed the other guards had begun to surround me slowly preparing their magic for a spell.

Faster than they could move I flicked a stone from my pocket at he first unicorn glowing as it flew from its alchemical reaction before exploding in a think haze of smoke and ran towards the back of the barn.

"DON'T LET HIM ESCAPE!"

As I burst through the wall a bolt of magic hit me back, as I continued I began to fatigue strangely quick.

The guards climbed out of the wreckage of the barn wall and began chase.

Running through the orchard with the guards behind me firing potshots at my back, one out of seven actually hitting me.

"DODGE RIGHT!" Truth yelled, I evaded a spear from the left which dug itself into a tree nearby.

That was way too close!

I turned on a stop and ran towards the edge of the farm losing the guards for a moment, looking back I saw two of the guards far behind me as they failed to keep up.

Wait.. Where's the other guard!

I quickly looked around me and found the last guard barely standing in the middle of the orchard a giant missile erupted from his horn straight at me moving faster than I could blink.

I'm sorry Millstone... I'm so sorry... I didn't mean to do this.

The last thing I saw before the magic slammed me into darkness was Russet and Melrose standing by the fence only a small distance away crying as I fell.

Chapter 5 - At the Gala

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"I’ll turn sadness and anger into strength"

I drifted in and out of consciousness as I was carted off to the dungeons mostly because of a half hourly shot to the face with magic or hoof from what my bruises tell me, but those small moments of lucidity were filled with pain, not because of what small injuries I had gotten but because I probably ruined Millstone and the others lives.

It couldn't tell how long I had been in their between the spells they cast on me and the hopelessness that filled my mind, as the sun began to set I was woken up to more guards arguing over some kind of rings before they poured some rancid liquid down my throat before placing rings on all of my fingers, shackles around my hands and ankles as they started searching my body.

"Stand him up..." a voice echoed distantly.

A transparent blue field filled my vision as I was lifted to my feet, a feeling of nausea overcame me as the field surrounded the rest of my body. in front of my was a white unicorn with what looked like a Roman centurion helmet made from gold with a decorate sun in the centre.

"You have been charged with the use of dark magic, resisting arrest and three acc-" The guard said, a shock ran through my skull at his pause "You will look me in the eyes when I talk to you beast... Now as I was saying, you are also charged with three accounts of assault on royal guards, your case will be seen by her majesty Princess Celestia in five days before you are sentenced for your crimes".


The next morning I woke up covered in sweat and acrid vomit, two guards pinned me down at my sides while a unicorn blinded me with a pale orange light.

"Can you hear me?" a delayed feminine voice called from the unicorn.

I tried speaking but my throat and lungs burned sending me into a coughing fit, when I finally stopped I looked back to the unicorn now noticing a red cross on her flank and nodded weakly.

"Thank Celestia..." She sighed before telling the guards to get off me and left, locking the cell behind them.

I laid there in my own sick and sweat for about an hour, thinking about my short time in Equestria, before I slowly crawled to the edge of the room. The guards returned with what I could assume was the nurse again a few minutes later who washed me up and gave me a once over with her magic.

"I think I've found the problem..." She hummed rubbing her chin with a hoof as she focused on my hands for just a sec before looking at one of the guards, "Guard can you tell me how much of the suppressant was added?"

The guards gave a nervous smile as he rubbed the back of his head "I may have added a little too much?".

In an instant that nurse was possibly the scariest thing in the world, she berated the guard into a quivering wreck of tears and piss in under a minute before he ran away "DON'T YOU RUN AWAY FROM ME! I'M NOT FINISHED WITH YOU!" the mare yelled as she chased after him even more pissed than before.

I suddenly noticed the other guard had come over to my side of the cell and was just staring at the door for a minute before he shook his and left after leaving a wooden plate of brown mush and a cup of water.


Over the next few hours I managed to keep down what that brown crap was and decided what I would do. Escape, because there was no way in hell I was going let myself be imprisoned for life or given the death sentence.

I learned from one of guards there was some massive party going on tonight to celebrate the construction of their castle, built in honour of the two princesses for defeating some evil villain or something. Anyway the gala would include guests from Zebrica and The Griffin Kingdoms so some guards would be pulled from the dungeons to be extra security detail for the night for either extra protection or a show of strength.

I managed to get a guard to give me a piece of chalk to "entertain" myself with if I didn't cause any trouble for him tonight. Stupid rookie.

How can he be this stupid? Seriously, It almost makes me feel bad for tricking him... Almost...

The chalk was mainly to get other items for my escape as well as making a circle to break down the door and leave no trace of my alchemy. I had started scratched transmutation circles onto tiles for quick access to different alchemy, sadly they had my book so there was a chance some of the tiles won't work at all, and if not. Boom goes the alchemist.

The guards had done a surprise check of all the cells in the afternoon, I managed to seal my things behind the back wall before they could search me or my room. After the guards finished their shakedown I decided I would wait until the beginning of the gala to make my escape.


This is it... It is finally done

Atop a balcony, overlooking crowds of ponies, griffins and zebra, an alabaster alicorn stood horn alight with magic bringing the sun down from its zenith, passing from all vision before the moon began to rise in its place and took its position in the sky.

"It is time sister..." A midnight alicorn said, walking out to balcony with a last wink of magic dying from her horn as the moon stood proud of the land.

Smiling as she turned to the crowd "Then lets us welcome our guests shall we?" she said as her sister stopped beside her.

A silence overwhelmed the crowd as the sisters approached the edge of the platform bringing a calm ambience over all "Greetings esteemed guests! Tonight we celebrate our triumph against Discord, his reign ending with his taint finally removed from our kingdom" the white alicorn spoke loudly.

"We invite you all to join us in this festivity of this prestigious night!" her sister continued.

They both joined in address "We announce this Grand Gala Open!".

Nothing could ruin this night


*BOOM*

I stood dumbly at the pile of rubble that used to be the cell door. Only moments before I had thrown a tile that was supposed to make the door crumble. Attempting a mixture of alchemy and alkahestry from what I could remember from the show to make a time activated reaction wasn't the brightest idea but it seemed pretty good at the time.

I'm really glad I threw that tile...

I jumped over the scorched stone debris that littered the hallway but not before noticing a white hoof poking out from underneath the pile of burnt stone.

Shit... I can't leave him like this...

I quickly moved as much stone off the guard before bringing him up to the quarters at the end of the hall and set the him down on a nearby bunk and took his keys. I searched the room for all my stuff before quickly leaving the dungeons before any guards check out what the explosion was.

I began sneaking my way through hallway after hallway in the castle for about an hour trying to find a way outside. Though fate seemed to have another idea for me as I found myself between a patrol of guards and room full of party goers with no place to hide with getting the attention the of guards.

Fuck it... Just need to go unnoticed by a room full of people...

I slowly the opened the door halfway before peeking inside trying to pick a good moment to go in. Most of the guests were in different groups, the griffins seemed to keep to themselves besides the odd pegasus who wanted to talk with them, the zebra's were talking with some earth ponies and the ponies seemed to mostly mingle with other ponies.

Sneaking myself inside and making my way through the party seemed to be easy since everyone stuck with their own groups. As I walked along the edge of the room I heard snippets of a boring conversations about arranging marriages and about party itself. By the time I had gotten my way across of the party I only had a few passing glances.

"What manner of creature art thou?" Shit...

Turning around only seemed to prove life wanted to make me it's plaything, right in front of me was a black alicorn with a curious look on her face as she looked at me, bowing quickly before deciding to answer her "Uhh... Well your majesty I am a... My name is Edward Elric, and I'm an Alchemist".

Well aren't you just brilliant? An Alchemist? That's the best I could come up with?

A look of confusion only replaced her look of curiosity "An Alchemist you say? We don't believe we have heard of such a creature before".

Ponies seemed to walk a bit closer as they saw the dark princess chatting with me and began to seem a lot more interested in me now, small groups seemed to form around us in the few moments.

"Well your majesty if it would please you, I could perhaps talk with you at a later time about myself" I said trying to avoid the attention I was quickly gaining with each passing second.

She blushed for a second before speaking "We-".

A guard quickly ran over to the princess, not even acknowledging he interrupted her before he whispered in her ear, a look of panic appearing on her face as he finished "Are thou sure?", nodding in reply only seemed to make her panic grow before calming down and looking back at me.

Oh shit...

"I'm sorry Mr Elric, We must leave..." she quickly spoke before rushing away.

Letting out a deep breath I didn't notice I had held in relief, I continued on my exit towards the back of the party.

As I made my way through the crowds after ponies seemed to want to talk to me since the princess left seemed to kill off any chance of sneaking around left me with an easier choice of walking straight through the hall and ignoring everyone.

As I approached the end of the room I noticed I had walked the wrong way and ended up overlooking a garden through a window instead of finding a door or passage out of the party. As I began to turn I saw the dark princess, another alicorn and a couple of guards back where we were before, looking straight at me with a look of surprise and anger.

Looking between the advancing group and the rest of the room I tried to think of a way out, I quickly made my decision as they were only a few metres away and smiled.


~Moments later - Outside~

*BOOM*

"SEE YOU FUCKERS!" A figure standing where a window used to be yelled at the stunned crowd and gave the princesses THE FINGER before leaping out the window, making a perfect exit.

Nailed it...


Over the next few weeks I survived living the woods and escaping guard sweeps of the area, living off any fruit I could find and the odd loaf of bread I took from guard camps I found, I also found one other thing, why those guards were at the farm...

It was because of a recent wave of robberies, the guards had been worried about Millstone he his family since Russet started finding gold nuggets and thought they might be next so yeah, I fucked up big time didn't I.

Speaking of them I made my way back to the farm and said my goodbyes to Millstone, Honeygold and the kids before leaving to keep them safe from the guards in case they find me again, also it turns out they had first come to the farm because of, though they did have one last thing to say to me. Apparently my name wasn't normal for enough for me, so they all decided a nickname for me that I would forever more be know me as...





































...Uncle Shorty


~Present Day - Ponyville Express~

"And that's pretty much it, I got turned to stone a couple of weeks later when the princesses found me knocked out from an experiment I had tried earlier, I'd suggest you never try fire alchemy, you'll live longer and you won't blow up" I said wisely.

Yes... Very wise words

"Uh... Mr? Was there supposed to be a point to this?".

I looked down at the teal unicorn who I held captive for the past two hours "I not sure... It was good to talk to someone though" I hummed before looking back up at the passing landscape.

"I guess... but don't you mean somepony?".

I smiled down at her and rustled her mane a little before replying "Never...".

Chapter 6 - Summoning Gravity

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"I can't put up with playing it safe.
... I've got nowhere to go home to."

Lyra promptly ran away after into another part of the train when I let her go, it was fun while it lasted, to talk to someone who isn't an insane god of chaos, I did have a feeling I wouldn't have to see him again though, from what I could tell from the orbital rainbow cannon that came down on where his capital of chaos was supposed to be anyway.

The rest of the train ride went by smoothly, watching the passing landscape from the window of a moving train is quite relaxing actually, this probably has something to do with being Edward Elric now or something. I had discovered other changes during my forest escapades with Luna such as, automail is a bitch to fix...

I mean seriously, doing a patch job on a prosthetic metal limb while hiding from a moon goddess isn't exactly the easiest thing to do, but neither is fixing automail in normal conditions. The whole process is insane unless you can figure out exactly what's wrong and how the to fix the damn thing. Like, I not going to find a automail engineer in ponyland either.

As the train finally pulled into the station I quickly jumped from the side of the coach as ponies began filling into the coach. I decided my best option was to wait out in the nearby forest until I can make a solid plan to either avoid being turned to stone again or somehow prove to them I wasn’t using dark magic, destroying their castle when I escaped probably wasn’t going to help my case either.

As I continued my way towards the forest I noticed a golden pegasus carriage flying away with what looked like a statue of Discord and the two princesses. As I entered the forest I began observing my surroundings, ponies were always afraid of places like forests for some reason, something about them controlling stuff themselves or something. After an hour into the forest I found myself at the base of a mountain range.

Using my alchemy I created a large cave a short distance into the mountain rock, I had started making when I wondered about those weird items I had given to Truth, despite my short time with him he seemed almost too happy to have them, grabbing a piece of chalk I began drawing out a human transmutation circle to open a portal to contact him.

As I finished I began to have my doubts about the circle, human transmutation or not, this thing could kill me or serve my body up to Truth on a silver platter in place of a bunch of knowledge.

Nothing ventured nothing gained I guess

Kneeling down I placed my hands on the edge of the circle, a wave of power made its way through me. Sparks of energy flashing from the runes as miasma of darkness flowed from the center of the circle forming a dark eye. Breaking away from the circle as the eye opened, a familiar figure of white rose from its centre slowly.

“You called Edward?~” The gleeful timbre of Truth’s voice echoed inside the cave.

Holding a shudder back at his voice “Have you learned anything from those items I gave you?” I asked.

“Not even a hello after all this time Edward? for shame young Alchemist, for shame,” Truth said with an unsettling grin, seeing my unamused face he pulling out a finely cut diamond “Fine, each of the items seems to be a summoning token of sort, I’m not sure what each will summon nor where they will be summoned from, but I am sure they are not of this realm.” he said before tossing the gem into my awaiting hands.

“That’s all you learned… One thousand years to prod this thing and that’s all you learned…”

“The tokens did not respond to me…” Truth replied softly “But I know someone who can make them work.”looking up at me with a little smile.

Looking at the diamond in my hand for a second I took a deep breath before bringing it up to my chest “Uh… Gravity Shifter I summon you?” I said sheepishly looking at Truth as I waited for something to happen.

A black and red portal swirled into existence a little ways away, a voice echoing from within. “Wow, that has to be the weakest summon I've ever had.” A moment later, a girl walked through, smirking at me. “What’s up, kid?”

Looking between Truth and the girl for a moment hoping I could make this less awkward for me than it already was. “Uh hi… I wasn’t really expecting that to work…” I said rubbing the back of my head “I was just kind of testing the summoning tokens or whatever they are for Truth here.”

She quirked her eyebrow. “Well, can’t say I’m not disappointed.” She lifted up her legs and actually laid down while floating in mid-air. “I was hoping to have some fun. Name’s Kat, by the way. Edward Elric, I presume?”

Looking back at Truth as he studied Kat silently before responding “Yeah… Can’t exactly provide anything fun at the moment.” I said briefly waving my hand around the room “So how do these tokens work? Truth has been poking these things for a good part of a thousand and a half years and hasn’t really figured out a single thing from them.”

“Hmm? Oh, you must be relatively new to it all then,” Kat said as she began to stand upside down. “Let me explain a little bit then. You are a Displaced, one of thousands throughout the multiverse who were once normal humans until being gifted with incredible powers. That much you’ve probably figured out. But the totems are the calling cards of each Displaced and can be used to request their aid or just to have some fun. Most of us are equipped and ready for battle. Fairly easy to figure out and can be used by most any living creature with the right amount of heart.”

Truth’s grin grew with each word Kat spoke “So were you sent here by some creepy guy cos-playing as the Merchant from Resident Evil or is this some random thing that happens?” I asked trying to glean any amount of information hoping I might be able to go home instead of avoid the princesses the rest of my life “I’m not exactly liked around here since I crashed a party a thousand years ago… So anyway to get back to earth would be appreciated.”

Kat put a finger to her chin in thought. “Hmm, if I remember right, another Displaced sent out an instruction folder some time ago with detail steps on how to get home for a Displaced. However, the usage requires Discord from what I remember. But don’t worry so much about the princesses. Believe it or not, that’s a recurring theme, even among heroes.”

“I don’t remember any folders dropping from the portal I got the totems from, and I haven’t seen or heard of anymore appearing since getting free. But Discord just got turned back into a lawn ornament by the princesses so I haven’t exactly got a chance at getting home do I?” I said wistfully.

Kat looked apologetic. “Sorry, but most of us are stuck like this. I never had any reason to go home, but I don’t know about you. However, if you've been stoned for a while, at this point… well I know it’s dark, but most everyone you've ever known are long gone.”

Even Truth looked saddened by what Kat said before he turned to me “She is right Edward and you know it, since you were petrified you never had a chance at going home and seeing your family again.” Truth said pointedly “Denying the Truth will only make it worse.”

She pointed at Truth. “You, shush,” she put her finger to her lips. “That’s not helping.”

“No… He’s right,” I said looking at both of them “Accepting it and moving on is the only way, Millstone would probably sit me down and slap me across the face until I accepted it, and then reminded me I'm part of his family.” I held back a small laugh.

Kat smiled fondly. “Well then, perhaps that should be your mission.”

“He probably has great great grandchildren by now, I doubt I’d be able to find them, even then, there is the chance they don’t even know about me,” I smiled “You know seem to know about Equestria a lot more than me… Do you know any Apples?”

“Wait… this Millstone was an Apple?” Kat said with a look of surprise.

“He was married to Honeygold Apple, Why?” I asked wondering what Kat could be thinking.

She smiled with a small laugh. “Talk about your coincidences. I actually know of a family of Apples who live not too far from Canterlot. It’s a small town called Ponyville, and it was actually founded by the Apple family.”

“Wow… That was easy then, guess I’ll have to visit them some time and see if they know about me.”

“Word of warning, however. You need to be extra careful in Ponyville. The six bearers of the Elements of Harmony all live in that one town, the Element of Magic being Celestia’s personal student. The place you’re looking for is called Sweet Apple Acres, and is run by the Element of Honesty, Applejack Apple. Don’t even try to lie to her because she can see through it in a heartbeat. If you’re tactful in your approach, then maybe she won’t report you to the princess who they pretty much have an instant messaging system set up with.”

“Well this just made things interesting. The only ones I could call my friends and family are also one of the things that will turn me back to stone… I guess I’ll have to either give myself up to them and hope I can explain myself before they can use their elements on me, or hope they will be as kind as Millstone was and let me stay even though I am a wanted criminal.” I said as I thought over the choices laid out to me.

“If my versions could put up with me, I'm sure you’ll be fine. Enfer, I've done a lot worse than crash a party.” Kat smiled. “I nearly destroyed the world in a bitter and revenge filled rage.”

I looked at her dumbly before responding “Well I can’t say I'm even on the scale compared to that, kinda makes me look like a Saturday cartoon villain compared to you,” I smirked. “Well… if you could manage to turn that around for yourself and still come out clean I guess I’ll have only a little trouble. Hopefully.”

Kat scratched her cheek with one finger, looking away with a nervous laugh. “Yeah… clean… ha ha. Anyway,” she shook her head, refocusing. “Just be careful. Both here and with other Displaced. For every good one, there’s another that isn't quite so good. Some will only see you as a pawn or a means to an end. So make sure who you’re dealing with is the right kind of person you want to associate yourself with. In a nutshell, don’t go making deals with devils.”

I grinned widely “I'm Edward Elric now, I've lost one of my arms and legs to a deity with an ironic sense of humor, you already know the consequences of that deal, so you can be sure I won’t be making any other deals soon.”

She smiled. “That’s the spirit. I can tell you’re gonna be fine. Just keep up your spirit and never let it die. Be true to who you’re representing. Unfortunately, I need to be going. Typhon’s gonna get mad if I miss date night… again. It’s awful when he’s mad because you can never tell when he’s mad and he’ll never even admit to being mad. And then he makes you think it’s all in your head and… I got off on a tangent there, didn't I?”

“A tiny bit… but anyways, thanks for the help. Now is there something I need to do to send you back or can you just come and go as you please sort of deal?” I asked.

“To send most back, just say that your contract is complete. That forces a Displaced back to where they came from. For the more experienced like me, I can just port in and out on a whim. But before I go, just know that whenever you need a hand, just give me a call, even if you just need to talk. You can always count on your Aunty Kat,” she said with a chuckle. “Oh and if you ever come across a Plumber Badge, ya know, from Ben 10, destroy it. My brother isn't very fond of other Displaced and it would just cause problems you don’t need.”

“Okay… I won’t pry,” I said a little unsure “I deem our contract complete Kat Shifter.” I smiled.

The portal reappeared, but before I could stop her, Kat hugged me before moving over to it. “Good luck, Ed. Just give Aunty a ring soon, okay? Bye!” She jumped through, it closing behind her a moment later.

“Edward?~” Truth said in a low voice.

“What is it Truth?” I asked noticing the look on his face.

“You forgot to ask how to make your own summoning token~” Truth smiled widely before disappearing back into the transmutation circle.

Fuck...

Chapter 7 - You're My Uncle?

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"An awesome fairy tale, etch it into history..."

Over the past week I had finished making my cave into an actual house, by the time I was finished I'd fought off a pack of wolves made of wood, two manticores and a fucking chimera on my daily hunting trips. I mean the one from Greek mythology. Yeah I was a bit upset that it wasn't something from Fullmetal too, would have made this place a lot better.

By then I had decided I would go to Sweet Apple Acres and meet the Apples Kat had told me about and see if they really are related to Millstone. But once again fate reared its ugly head and taunted me with was the most confusing thing I had seen since being sent here. Ponies beating the tar out of each other. The fight seemed to focus on a whichever pony decided to ran away or something. By sundown the ponies still hadn't finished their brawl, when Celestia came out of nowhere as she lowered the sun and descended onto the crowds and made them stop fighting with her magic. By then I was looking over my back as I ran back into the forest hoping she hadn't seen me and wondering what the hell had I just seen.

Only a few nights later Princess Luna had come to town during some Halloween festival they were having and terrorised half the town trying to explain that she wasn't evil or something while yelling at them in the Royal Canterlot Voice. I wasn't sure whether I should laugh at how clueless she was or cry how clueless all of them were at the simply problem they faced. Though the pink one scares me. She would slowly turn her head towards me at random times during the night as if she knew where I was and then smile and wave.


This is it...

I stood motionlessly as I stared at a hanging sign with words "Sweet Apple Acres" carved deep into the wood. Time slowly past by as the sun rose from the horizon painting the farm in it's morning glow, a bright red barn-style house stood in the middle, hundreds of tree were scattered around the property with bright red apples hanging from their branches. A loud crowing broke from my thoughts. I slowly walked up the dirt path and onto the porch, a murmur of voices reached my ears, I knocked on the door twice and stepped back and leaned down a little as I waited.

"Just ah moment! Who goes knocking on ponies door's at this time ah mornin'..." A strong southern accented voice called. A light orange mare with a stetson hat stood on the other side as the door slowly opened. "Now how can ah help-" The mare stood wide-eyed as she looked at me.

"Just let me explain myself before you start yelling, okay?" I said placatingly trying to lower myself even further "Your name is Applejack yeah?".

She nodded slowly, her eyes never losing there focus on me.

"I don't suppose you know who I am, do you...?" I asked getting another slow shake of her head in return "Crap... Well my name is Edward Elric. I know this is probably going to sound insane. But, I might be your great great great great great great great great great great great great grand uncle... Give or take a few greats."

"Yer right... That does sound a'might... crazy," Applejack shook her head lightly, eyes closed "But ah can tell you ain't lying..." she said while standing a little more confidently.

Well this is awkward now...

We stood there just staring at each other for a few moment before someone yelled hoarsely "Just let whoever it is in and come eat breakfast!"

"How about you join us for breakfast. But you got some explaining to do after. Got it?" Applejack said with a glint in her eye before moving back inside.

This is going to be one of those really weird times isn't it...


During breakfast I met with Applejack's brother Big Macintosh, a large red stallion who took strong and silent to a new level, that or he's mute. Granny Smith, reminded me a lot of Honeygold, the frying pan she, swinging at my head when I entered the kitchen certainly helped. And finally Applejack told me about her little sister. Applebloom, a young red-haired filly, who by the sound of it, was one of the kids I saw before Discord freed me.

When Applejack told them about me possibly being their relative Granny Smith pulled me from the table and looked over every part of me with a scrutinizing eye for a minute before declaring I hadn't a lick of resemblance to them. I swear she is freaking senile or she really wanted to troll everyone by the way she smiled at our deadpan look before she continued eating her breakfast with gusto.

After we had finished up, we sat down in their living room and I started telling them about Millstone, Honeygold, Golden and Melrose. Granny Smith looked at me strangely when I mentioned their names while the two Apple siblings stared at me with neutral expressions for most of my tale. When I told them about my age and alchemy Applejack fell of her seat laughing. Grabbing the few bits I had with me and transmuting them into a tiny statue in my likeliness with the added 'I'm dead serious' look stopped her laughing, but only manage to raise more questions. I gave them a quick explanation of alchemy to stop their questions before continuing on.

When I was finished telling them about my time in Equestria, the non-incriminating parts anyway, Granny Smith was still looking at me with a strange demeanour before telling a story of her own. Apparently I had become somewhat of a bedtime story they passed down along the generations, though most of it somehow got twisted throughout the years and slowly began portraying me as some guardian to the family or a of leprechaun who would bring fortune. Somehow I had made a big impact of the with what was the founding Apple Family, even in that week I stayed with them.

"I can still remember the stories about him," Granny Smith replied, her mischievous smile never dulling in the slightest "My favorite story was the one about Uncle Shorty."

I groaned and slammed my head into my lap at her words while the others started laughing. "Seriously? They have stories about that too?" I mumbled into the table quietly.

"I'm just having my fun now deary. Besides, there is one thing I need to check before I can say you definitely are him. Now look at me..." Granny Smith said getting me to lift my head to see her wide grin "So what do you need me to-"

*Whack*

"AH GODDAMNIT!" I yelled at the old mare as she chuckled "What the hell was that for?"

Fucking hoof slaps... I swear...

I glared at the wrinkled mare as I nursed my bruised face "So what was the point of that?" I asked pointedly.

"Well one of those stories mentioned something of slapping you across the face if I recall," she chuckled again "Had a similar reaction to it too in the stories."

Goddamnit Millstone...

Applejack questioned, silencing the room "Wait wait wait. So your telling us, this feller here is not only of long lost uncle... But also is one of the reasons we Apples have a family to talk about?" only getting a nod and smile from the old mare before she turned to me with a look that could only mean one thing "How old are you anyway, you must be over a thousand by now."

Looking back at her as I scratched the back of my head "Well... I'll technically be one-thousand, five-hundred and twenty-four year old at the winter solstice." I smiled before realising where this was probably headed.

"An' how can be that old anyway? Only the Princesses and that no good Discord have been around that long..."

Looking around I could see Granny and Macintosh seemed interested in knowing as well. Taking a deep breathe I began "Well... The thing is... I was-"

*Slam*

"Granny! Ahm home!" We all turned our heads to see Applebloom trotting in through the front door.

"Applebloom! We have someone for you to meet!"

A yellow filly with a reddish mane wearing a pink bow turned towards us, completely ignoring me for the moment and walked straight up to the rest of her family "Who is it?"

Granny Smith smiled "If you turn around you can find out for yourself."

It felt like hours had passed before she finally faced me with a curious look on her face before it exploded into a wide grin. I closed my eyes expecting her to start streaming question after question, but only a light poking followed.

Huh?

Opening my eyes I found her inspecting my automail arm in her hooves, poking at each of the parts and looking at her reflection on it's surface before opening her mouth to speak "Wait a minute..."

Penny in the air...

Applebloom turned her head towards me, her inquisitive look slowly became one of realisation, and then strangely enough her smile returned even greater than before "YOUR AN ALCHEMIST!"

...And the penny drops

"I saw a statue in Canterlot last week that looks just like..."

Where the heck did that second penny come from...

"...you"

I gave a sheepish smile as everyone in the room slowly began to realised what Applebloom was saying.