The Cycle

by kudzuhaiku

First published

A most unusual foal, cursed by the changing moon, is taken into Luna's care. But is Luna ready to look after a newborn foal?

Reading The Chase is quite helpful in understanding what is going on in the background and is recommended...


Born a lunar pegasus, a strange foal seems to be changing into a unicorn shortly after birth. Called in to to investigate the magical curiousity, Princess Luna is asked to take the foal into her custody. After first mistaking the foal for a lunar alicorn, but then learning the truth, Luna agrees to take the foal into her care.

Luna learns the hard way that foal care is not her forte and the immortal alicorn is quickly laid low by the newborn foal.

Chapter 1

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“Your Majesty, Princess Luna of Equestria… we are glad that you could come and deal with this in pony. The magical curiousity is just this way if you would please follow me through this door,” the doctor, an earth pony, said in a warm welcoming voice that went cold when he said ‘magical curiousity’ and then became warm again.

Turning to look at her loyal lunar pegasus guards, Princess Luna gave a nod to them and then turned around to look at the doctor once more, feeling perturbed about the words ‘magical curiousity’ and the way they were spoken. She knew very little about why she was here in Trottingham, other than it was something related to curious moon magic.

“I trust your oceanic flight was pleasurable?” a pegasus nurse asked in a friendly voice. “I have family in Equestria. They gave birth to a unicorn and didn’t want to give him up.”

“My flight was fine, thank you,” Princess Luna said, controlling her temper before it became a problem. She knew all too well how they treated unicorns here. “Show me the foal,” she commanded as she held her head high.

“This way, if you please,” the doctor replied as he stepped aside from the door to allow Princess Luna to pass. He smiled nervously as the night blue alicorn stepped through the door, and then he followed after her.

“Is this he?” Princess Luna asked as she peered down into a small cradle. All that was visible was the end of a grey muzzle. She lowered her head. “He does not seem to be so terrifying,” she stated.

“The foal was born to a unicorn mother. She had a dalliance with a lunar pegasus. After a great many complications, we had to surgically remove the foal from the mother. He was very large, almost the size of a yearling, and she was very small and slight. She died during the operation,” the earth pony doctor explained in an emotionless voice that was nearly a monotone.

“Lunar pegasi do tend to be quite large,” Luna said, her voice a little sad from hearing the news. She continued to peer down at the foal buried in blankets and heard it gurgle. Glaring at the doctor, Luna’s nostrils flared. “Perhaps a unicorn doctor with fine magical precision might have saved her during surgery. Fools.”

Carefully ignoring Luna’s snide remark, the doctor cleared his throat and then looked at Luna. “We thought we would have the military raise it in one of their project barracks. Lunar pegasi are good for fighting. We planned to give it a bright future. But then we noticed the change,” the doctor said in a low strained voice that held a tinge of fear. “Pull away the blankets and you will see.”

Her horn igniting and blazing blue with her magic, Princess Luna carefully pulled the blanket away from the colt in the cradle. She hissed in shock, pulling her head back in surprise. “A lunar alicorn?” Princess Luna questioned in a voice thick with disbelief.

“No… we don’t think so,” the earth pony doctor replied as he shook his head. “He was born as a lunar pegasus, no doubt about that. He was born a very dark grey, almost black. As the days have passed though, he has become lighter in colour… we noticed his wings were shrinking… and then we noticed the growth on his forehead. We noticed he was getting smaller and losing weight. He is changing into a unicorn. We do not know why. Which is why we sent an urgent message to you. We ask that you take him. He frightens the staff… he is-”

“Not wanted?” Princess Luna interrupted angrily. “Still afraid of unicorns? Still keeping them drugged? Still keeping them as servants to labour for the greater good? Does this one frighten you?”

“Majesty please… I want no part in a discussion of politics. I’m a doctor. I genuinely wanted what is best for this foal. As a unicorn, he would have no good future here in Trottingham,” the doctor replied in a pleading voice.

Feeling extremely agitated, Princess Luna looked down at the foal that was looking up at her. She could feel his shadow essence; it was still quite strong. A short nubbin of horn protruded from his forehead. Upon closer inspection, the wings were in fact small, almost stunted looking. A tuft of shocking electric blue mane rose up from between the two tufted ears and Luna could see two little fangs. “Do tell me, was he born on a full moon?” Luna questioned.

“Yes. Yes he was Princess Luna,” the doctor replied as he stepped away from Luna and into the corner of the room to watch the alicorn continue to inspect the foal.

Lowering her head, her snoot inches from the foal, Luna could smell milk breath and the scent of newborn foal. She saw the colt’s legs kicking and the little leathery wings fluttered at its sides. She dropped her head further and bumped her snoot against the foal’s tiny barrel, being oh so careful not to hit the spot where part of the umbilical cord still protruded.

When Luna touched him, the colt sneezed mightily against the side of of Luna’s face.

“You sneezed on me!” Luna said in an accusing tone as she jerked her head upwards.

“Foals sneeze some-”

“Silence,” Princess Luna commanded, interrupting the doctor as she lowered her head. Her eyes narrowing, she came snoot to snoot with the almost yearling sized colt. “You are a most curious creature,” she crooned in a soft voice. “Would you like to come home with me?”

“So you will take him?” the doctor inquired in a nervous raspy voice.

“He sneezed upon my royal body. I have claimed him for this offense,” Princess Luna said as she reached out one wing and touched the foal, moving her primaries over the his ribs. The night princess smiled a faint almost imperceptible smile, the corners of her lips turning upwards in a manner that only the most observant of pegasi might notice. “You will soon regret what you have done.”

The foal burbled in protest and tried to squirm away from the tickling touch of Luna’s wing, his own tiny wings flapping and his legs kicking clumsily in the air, his forelegs brushing up against Luna’s cheek. Again, the foal sneezed.

“Twice!” Princess Luna shouted as she lifted her head away. “Knave!”

Standing in the corner, the doctor cleared his throat.

Using her magic, Princess Luna lifted the foal to wrap him in blankets, carefully swaddling him after making sure his wings were securely tucked to his sides, all the while crooning some wordless lullaby to the foal which caused him to close his eyes and fall asleep almost immediately.

Turning, Princess Luna stared at the doctor. “I will require nourishment for him. At least until I can make it home. I take it I am free to leave with him and face no complications?”

“We can provide you with bottles of formula… and yes, he is yours. The Crown has sent word, he is yours to keep. Perhaps you can unravel the mystery of why he is changing before it is too late,” the doctor replied in a worried voice.

“Too late for what?” asked Princess Luna as she raised one eyebrow and stared at the earth pony doctor, her teal eyes glittering in the faint light of the hospital room where the foal had been kept in the dark.

“Why… becoming a unicorn of course,” the doctor answered nervously, unable to look Princess Luna in the eye as he spoke, staring down at his own front hooves instead.


Aboard the airship The Phobetor, Luna paced near the pile of cushions where the foal lay sleeping. Unable to help herself, she kept coming over to look at the colt while he lay sleeping, making sure he was covered, that he was warm, and most importantly, that he was still breathing, which was a completely irrational fear that had beset her.

Standing near the nest made for the colt, Luna looked over at Grimglammer, her lips pursed together in a thin straight line as she did so. “I feel fretful and out of sorts,” confessed Luna in a silken whisper.

“Many in your condition often have these symptoms,” Grimglammer replied in a soft voice. The big lunar mare smiled a smug smile as she looked at Luna and said nothing more.

“Medical doctors should not say the word ‘condition’ and then go silent,” Luna hissed in annoyance as she circled around the cushion pile.

“Oh it is a dreadful condition,” Grimglammer whispered, her tone faintly teasing.

“Do not jest,” Luna commanded in a harsh whisper.

“Sorry Mistress, I was out of place,” Grimglammer answered as she bowed her head.

Ceasing her circling, using her magic, Luna lifted the edge of the blanket and peered beneath, her nostrils crinkling. The alicorn’s ears pinned back against her skull as she dropped the blanket and stepped away. “He has soiled the air… and his diaper as well. The term the grey pegasus mare uses is ‘made a stinky’ I do believe,” Luna stated in a monotone that held a hint of disgust.

Clearing her throat, Grimglammer nodded. “Yes. Derpy does in fact use that term to describe a soiled diaper,” the big lunar mare replied as she sniffed. Her ears perked forward. “That is an unpleasant funk.”

“Indeed it is Grimglammer,” Luna said as she lifted the colt from his pillow pile and then carefully laid him out upon the bare floor. She gathered up everything she needed to change a diaper from a bag placed in the corner of the room. “Oh this foul miasma is abysmal,” Luna said through her nose as she tried not to breathe.

Feeling the cool air upon his suddenly naked bottom, the colt awoke. The colt began to squeal at first, then cry, and finally, he worked his way up to an ear piercing shriek, his cry the cry of an alarm siren. He screamed using his voice and the sounds of echolocation, his orange tongue lolling out of his mouth as he hollered.

Standing directly over the colt, Luna went to work trying to clean him up, trying to remove the caked on feces around his little backside, when she happened to notice something wet and quite warm trickling against her neck and cheek. She heard Grimglammer snigger and Luna growled. “Not one word Grimglammer… not one word.”

“Mistress, he is still going,” Grimglammer announced to one very frustrated alicorn.

Snarling, Luna raised her head. “It is in his tail!”

“And all over the floor as well,” Grimglammer remarked.

“These diapers… for convenience... they are anything but! Long ago we let foals remain in a paddock full of straw that we changed periodically. Helpful pegasi would use rainclouds to wash away the filth. His pelt is filthy and his tail is soiled,” Luna said in an irritated voice.

“Ah, the wonders of the modern age. Now we have modern conveniences like diapers. Isn’t it wonderful?” Grimglammer responded as she watched Luna stand there helplessly.

Lifting the colt from the floor, using her magic to make sure that nothing dripped, Luna carried the squealing foal out of the room and into the small private bathroom. She ran a little warm water into the sink, making sure that it wasn’t too hot, and then just before she plopped the foal in the sink, she reconsidered.

Turning on the shower instead, checking the water temperature to make sure the foal was unharmed, Luna allowed the streaming water to wash away the mess. Turning the foal upside down, she allowed the running water to splash upon his little soiled plot furrow.

She pulled the foal out of the shower after he was clean, wrapped him in a fluffy towel, and then allowed the water to drain out of the sink. Luna bounced him up and down carefully in her magic, trying to silence his screaming. She stepped back into the room and saw a helpful unicorn cleaning the floor with disinfectant and Grimglammer was in the corner, smiling smugly.

“He’s probably hungry,” Grimglammer suggested in a soft voice that held a hint of mirth.

Scowling, Luna shook her head. “I do not know that I like foal formula. It seems wrong somehow,” Luna grumbled as she pulled out a bottle from the sack. The bottle was cold, well chilled, the formula preserved. Igniting her horn, Luna warmed the bottle and gave it a shake.

Still wrapped in a towel, Luna laid the colt down upon the floor and then stuck the bottle into his shrieking maw. For a moment, the shrieking ceased and the foal became silent. Leaning her head down low, Luna smiled at the colt and made sucking motions with her lips, hoping he would suckle upon the bottle. After one very confused moment, the colt turned his head away from the bottle, kicking with his front legs as he did so, and then sprayed out the mouthful of formula upon Luna, leaving her with a dripping face covered in warm formula.

“I must say little one… I find your attempts to endear yourself to me quite enchanting,” Luna remarked in deadpan, one ear twitching as she spoke. She spat away the formula upon her lips and made a disgusted face. “This is wretched. No wonder he does not want it.”

“Perhaps a wetnurse is in order,” Grimglammer suggested in a low amused sounding voice. “Shall I put out word for one when we return to Canterlot?”

“Canterlot is too far away. We should be nearing the Shetlands. We shall make a stop forthwith and find a wetnurse,” Luna replied as she shook formula from her face.

Chapter 2

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Sulking, Princess Luna threw herself down upon a large bowl shaped chair in the corner, her ears splaying out sideways as she settled in. She bared her teeth and ground them together angrily before clearing her throat and then scowling at Grimglammer. “How dare they just dismiss me and send me away.”

“Mistress, you were not dismissed… the Shetlands are a very troubled place. Nursing mares are needed there. There are many needy foals and spare mares with milk are needed to make butter and cheese,” Grimglammer responded in a patient voice.

Her eyes narrowing, Princess Luna peered at Grimglammer. “I could make you into a nursemaid.” Luna waited, watching Grimglammer’s reaction, and a faint smile graced her lips.

“Mistress, while I would do anything to serve you, I have to politely turn down your offer-”

“Who said I was offering?” Princess Luna interrupted.

“I will be having my own foals soon and it is my desire to save that magical moment of the first time with my own foal,” Grimglammer continued as she eased herself down into a chair and looked pleadingly at Luna.

“Oh very well. I would never want to take that from you. You are too good of a friend,” Luna grumbled as her gaze shifted to the colt sleeping in a nest of pillows in the middle of the room. “He will wake again soon. He seemed happy to suckle while we were in the Shetlands.”

Snickering, Grimglammer rested her scarred head upon a cushion. “That mare was not happy about it though. Those little teeth are sharp.”

Her expression becoming puzzled, Luna shook her head. “Why do they even make foal formula if foals won't drink it?” she asked as her ears drooped down to the sides of her face.

“Quite a few foals will. Enough of them that they can sell the product I suppose. As a medical doctor, I have to say… it is of my personal opinion that teat milk is better in most instances. A lot of the soy and grain by products in formula causes gas and all manner of digestive issues for most foals,” Grimglammer replied as she tucked in her wings and made herself comfortable.

“Looking after a foal is much harder than I thought it would be,” Luna confessed in a barely audible voice. She shook her head. “I must confess, I have nearly lost my temper a few times. I do not know why this is different. I have been around foals before. Harper… Peekaboo… others… why is this so difficult?”

“Permission to speak freely Mistress?” Grimglammer asked in reply.

Looking over at one of her most dutiful and devoted of servants, Luna blinked. “You have retired as a Myrmidon. You still have some unofficial capacity of course but I value you more as my friend, not some mere toady.”

Lifting her head, Grimglammer offered a soft nod as a way of expressing her gratitude. “Mistress… those other foals… you could play with them, have fun with them, spend time with them, but the moment that it became work, you had the means to pass them back to their parents. You’ve never had to sit up with a sick foal that has colic… you’ve had all of the play and none of the work.”

“Are you suggesting that I am spoiled in this aspect?” Luna questioned in a flat monotone.

The sudden silence was a veritable cacophony of awkwardness as it thundered into the room like a an army marching on steel shod hooves and wearing full heavy platemail. As Luna patiently waited for an answer, Grimglammer patiently waited for the world to end, hoping that the end would come swiftly.

“Your silence speaks volumes,” Luna stated.

“Mistress…”

“Call me Luna in this instance,” Luna interjected.

“Um… Luna,” Grimglammer said, saying the word strangely, she let it roll around her tongue as if she was sampling some new exotic wine. “Luna... I would suggest that you have always relied upon others for day to day tasks and you looked after far more pressing concerns such as keeping the world safe. Common dull tasks like changing diapers are beneath your notice. You are ill equipped for the tasks of motherhood… even just the simple task of feeding a newborn you immediately sought help… assistance for the task so you could delegate the responsibility to another-”

“You are very politely saying in many well spoken words that I am unfit to be a mother,” Luna interrupted as she nodded her head up and down.

“No no… I would never say that-”

“But you just did,” Luna said, cutting off Grimglammer once again.

“No… no, please, hear me out, I am merely saying that you have other more pressing concerns that get in the way of being a parent. You have obligations and duties… there are demands made upon you that are-”

“The average modern mare works and raises foals. There are single mothers now. Lone mares that work and somehow manage to raise foals upon their own and they are not royalty that can pass off their responsibilities to loyal flunkies. Are you somehow suggesting that I am not capable of the same?” Luna interrupted, once again preventing Grimglammer from a flood of clever words.

“Those mothers are not you,” Grimglammer said and then fell silent. She knew there would be no talking her way out of this mess. She had stepped in the meadow muffins and they were currently stuck to her hooves.

“Once again, I am Luna, one thousand years out of date and lost in the past. Even my sister has raised foals,” Luna said dejectedly as her lower lip protruded in a pout. She rested her head upon the edge of the chair, one ear twitching in annoyance, and she heaved a heartbroken sigh.

Regretting what it was that she was about to do, Grimglammer took a deep breath and prepared to speak openly. “Luna… from what I know of you, you were raised by nursemaids, teachers, servants, nannies, various guardians and protectors. You learned efficient delegation for tasks by being the very task that was passed along. You never had a normal sense of family… probably the closest thing you associate with familial feeling is a sense of martial familiarity; military codes of honour, allegiance, and loyalty. I think at times you confuse martial camaraderie with genuine affection. Your whole mindset is militance… you are the War Maiden.”

“But… I love… I have relationships,” Luna stammered.

Shaking her head, Grimglammer’s ears fearfully splayed out sideways. “You have cronies, minions, lackeys, and associates that you continually assert your dominance over. Even the ones you love, you make sure to maintain your superiourity over them. You trust no one, you let no one in, even your own sister, you hold yourself back and very rarely let down your guard or allow yourself to show genuine affection. Barley, who you claim to love, you only go to him when you have time… why do you think that never once has Barley ever approached you or sent you a message about wanting to spend time with you? He’s just like the rest of us, hoping you will drop by and pay a visit when you finally decide to make time for us.”

A single tear rolled down Luna’s cheek, lingered on her fine jawline for a moment, and then continued down to the cushion where she rested her head, leaving behind a dark spot.

“I apologise, please forgive me,” Grimglammer said in a fearful voice.

“For being honest?” Luna murmured. “No. I will not forgive you for that. There is nothing to forgive. Tell me Grimglammer… can I change? I have been this way for so long… I think about it and I am filled with doubt.”

Clearing her throat, Grimglammer nodded, causing the cushion her head was resting upon to rumple. “You have already changed so much. You’ve adapted to the modern era. You learned how to speak like we do. You no longer treat your subjects quite as poorly as you did. You have adapted remarkably… so you yes, you are capable of change. You can always break the cycle.”

Blinking back more tears, Luna glanced at the colt sleeping in the pile of pillows in the center of the room. She could hear little sniffling snorts as he slumbered. Reaching out with her magic, she lifted the colt carefully and levitated him over to her chair, where she carefully tucked him in beside of her. He immediately squirmed closer, trying to get warm, letting out a soft whimper as he buried his face against her side.

“Mistress… Luna... what are you planning?” Grimglammer inquired, raising her head from the cushion to look at Luna as she spoke.

“You said it well… I must break the cycle,” Luna responded as she tucked her wing over the colt and curled her body around him.

“But… but you can’t… you can’t do what I think you are planning to do... there are so many reasons why you can’t,” Grimglammer protested in a wheedling voice.

“And there are so many reasons why I should. Am I not a mare of this modern era? Do you think me incapable? Am I too selfish? Self absorbed? Am I unfit?” Luna questioned in reply.

Cringing, Grimglammer dared not reply.

“First things first. I need to see if I can still produce milk. I know that I am sterile but milk might still be possible. Everything else, I shall learn as I go. I will do this myself,” Luna stated as she dug deep within her pegasus nature, searching for the gentle parts of her pegasus nature that had gone dormant. “I will also be a better caretaker of Tourmaline. I have treated her poorly. This must be remedied.”

Feeling a very peculiar feeling, it took Grimglammer several moments to understand that she was feeling some new variety of terror. She had killed quite a number of dangerous creatures, including a few smaller dragons, a wyvern, one very ill tempered manticore, a small army of foul mouthed minotaurs, and during her career as a Myrmidon she had been in all manner of life threatening situations. She had even been brought down by a mutant earth pony foal that had a working thaumaturgical system and had zapped her into submission.

But try as she might, Grimglammer could not recall feeling terror quite like this.

“I will help you,” Grimglammer offered, her voice an almost foalish squeak.

“Only if I allow you. The whole point of this is that I do this myself and not pass my responsibilities to another,” Luna responded as her horn glowed a fierce glittering blue.

“Then Furious, Shadowguard, and I will be there to support you should you need us,” Grimglammer countered, the cold creeping of terror still marching down her spine towards her dock. Her wings fluttered as she shivered.

Not bothering to reply, Luna began to hum an old lullabye, some ancient forgotten tune that was a thousand years out of date as she curled tighter around the colt. He was large, but so was she, much larger than the average mare, and the colt was an ideal size for Luna by comparison. The place where his snoot was pressed was dampened by his breathing, but Luna did not mind.

Watching Luna, Grimglammer could see the mare’s demeanour changing. Luna’s ears were perked now, there was a pleasant smile upon her face, and the previous expression of despondent depression seemed to have vanished for the moment. Grimglammer took a deep breath and continued to watch as Luna continued to work whatever magic she was bringing to bear. The room crackled with energy. Grimglammer could see that Luna’s face had become quite serene.

“I can feel the change overcoming me,” Luna murmured as one ear began to twitch.

Feeling concerned, Grimglammer did not understand what Luna meant.

“Luna… a foal is a very large time investment,” Grimglammer insisted in a hesitant voice. “Even modern mares turn to foal sitters from time to time. I am urging you to turn to your most trusted companions for help. Do not allow yourself to be overwhelmed where it might interfere with your many duties as the Princess of the Night.”

“I will take your advice into consideration,” Luna responded as she lifted her head high. “I feel a most curious sensation of warmth… and wetness… he did it again! The diaper did not hold!”

Chapter 3

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“Oh my… I do believe you have become a shade lighter. I also believe your wings are smaller and your horn is larger. How peculiar,” Princess Luna said as she looked at the colt at her side. The colt yawned, revealing to Luna a mouth full of little needle teeth. She saw his eyes, an odd shade of yellow-green. She saw that he was awake, alert, aware, and currently staring up at her.

The colt’s tummy gurgled, squelched, and then growled in protest of being empty.

“Hungry?” Luna asked as she looked down at the foal. She rolled over onto her side, kicked out one leg, and pulled the colt closer, gently turning him so that his head rested on her inner thigh. A second later, she felt several needle-like teeth sink into her flesh. Luna hissed but did not cry out. Lunar pegasi were far better equipped for nursing little lunar foals, with thick leathery skin that was too tough for the needle sharp fangs to pierce too deeply.

Not only was the foal suckling, but it felt as though the little monster was chewing.

Gritting her teeth, Luna endured. This was not the worst she had suffered. She had been mauled by griffons, savaged by some of the foulest demons in Tartarus, brutally hoof-noogied by her sister Celestia, and she had once endured the drudgery of the Day Court. This was simply feeding a foal and nothing more…

“OUCH!”

Her eyes going wide, Luna’s head lifted away from the cushion and shot upright. She bit down upon her lip. An odd trio of sensations was going on. There was the feeling the foal suckling, the pain of little needle teeth nipping into her tender skin, and the curious sensation of the foal lapping his sandpapery tongue against her rendered flesh.

“You continue to debase me,” Luna growled softly.

There was a knock upon the door and it opened just a crack. “Mistress?”

Forcing her teeth to unclench, Luna inhaled sharply. “Enter,” she said as she exhaled.

Grimglammer stepped through the door and cautiously approached Luna, who was curled up in the big bowl shaped chair. The big lunar pegasus mare could see the pain that was evident upon Luna’s face. Grimglammer frowned. “I’ll be right back. I’m going to get my medkit. There is a useful salve in there that will ease the pain once you are done feeding.”

“Will the salve leave a bad taste or hurt the foal?” Luna whispered.

“No, it will not harm him. It should be absorbed before he feeds again. We can always clean you off before you feed again. You certainly seem dedicated to this course of action,” Grimglammer replied.

“I have made a terrible mistake. The mare who nursed him on the Shetlands… I said terrible things to her accusing her of weakness… I was wrong Grimglammer. She was strong… she was strong and I should have commended her rather than berate her,” Luna confessed in a rare admission of wrongdoing.

“She’s probably had plenty of little teeth give her a nip down there and that’s probably toughened up her skin. Still, Lunar pegasi foals like a little blood with their milk if they can get it,” Grimglammer responded. She felt a deep sense of concern for Luna as she stood near Luna’s place of rest. “I will return.”


Standing in the shower, Luna allowed the steaming hot water to rain down upon her back, trickle down her sides, and run rivulets over her belly. She could feel the sting of hot water on her wounded flesh. She rested her cheek against the steam warmed tile. She could feel the water trickling over her dock and down her plot furrow, soaking into secret places hidden within.

She had left the foal in Grimglammer’s care.

Unseen in the deluge caused by the showerhead, tears ran down Luna’s cheeks. Not just from the pain of having her flesh chewed, but from the beauty of the moment she had endured. A powerful blend of hormones now flooded Luna’s body.

As the water poured down in streams, droplets of crimson blood dribbled down, running red streaks through the water, and circled down the drain. As Luna stood in the shower, droplets of blood oozing out from her savaged flesh, she felt the bitter pain of hypocrisy, a pain that hurt much worse than little needle teeth nipping at her flesh. She was so quick to pounce upon others for moments of frailty, to chide them, to berate them, to chastise them for expressing pain or weakness.

Standing there, with blood seeping from her gnawed upon flesh, Luna suffered a painful thought. She hadn’t even given birth to the little monster. All she had done was feed him. Rubbing her cheek against the warm wet tile, Luna slowly began to gain a new appreciation for the many mares in her life that had foals. Equestria needed a holiday celebrating the courage of the many mares that had given birth… some sort of celebration of motherhood… some day set aside as a holiday specifically for mothers.


Standing upon the deck of The Phobetor, Luna stared off at the distant stars twinkling in the black velvet night. Hung from a sling around her neck, the foal burbled and mumbled, swaddled in blankets to protect it from the frigid night air.

Feeling the cold breeze of night upon her feverish injured skin, Luna stood proud, her ears erect, her nose turned into the breeze. Beside her stood Grimglammer, the long hairs of her shaggy pelt rippling in the wind as the airship raced towards home.

“It bothers me… Trottingham. I do not like what is done there,” Grimglammer stated.

“It continues to worsen,” Luna responded, turning to glance at Grimglammer for a moment and then she resumed looking ahead. “When one looks at our own unicorn problem and the banishment of our noble houses, I suppose I can understand some small part of their fear.”

Shaking her head, Grimglammer snorted.

“It was not always this bad. One of our own Black Cloaks came from Trottingham. She worked for the government, hunting down the resistance and subjugating those unwilling to obey. For a time, she honestly believed she was serving the public interest. She had been made to believe that what she was doing was for the public good. Witching Hour was just making sure that society was well served,” Luna said as she fondly thought of Witching Hour.

“What changed her mind?” Grimglammer asked as she turned to look at the foal slung from Princess Luna’s neck. She gently nosed the foal and her ears perked when the foal cooed in reply. “I mean, she came to Equestria for a reason.”

“One day, the Unity Enforcers announced that the resistance was almost over. Not long after, a group of unicorns under geas came for Witching Hour. They attempted to subdue her. They wanted to drug her and turn her into one of the near mindless servants like all of the others who use their magic for the greater good, to serve ponies and make their society great,” Luna answered as one ear twitched in the wind.

“What happened?” Grimglammer questioned as she lifted her head away from the foal and looked up at Princess Luna. “I mean, she got away, that much is clear.”

“She killed them. Witching Hour killed them. She killed her former companions, her former friends, she killed those she had once called brother and sister. She began a killing spree that started in the center of Trottingham proper and ended at the seaside, where she commandeered a ship and sailed away. Wisely, they did not pursue her,” Luna replied as she turned to look at Grimglammer. “As for Tiddlywinks, she rescued him shortly before boarding the ship. He was her friend and she discovered him just before she detonated the asylum where she held previous employment. His brains had been scrambled, but just enough of him remained that he begged her for help. The rest of the residents were busy trying to kill her. They were all under geas and quite mad.”

“I knew Witching Hour was dangerous…”

“You have no idea,” Luna interjected in a low voice. “When she came to Equestria, she was a broken raving mess. She sought asylum. This was before my return. My sister gave it to her. Celestia had to work hard to fix Tiddlywinks… she does not have the same degree of control that I do regarding mental manipulation magic. She also had to seal off Witching Hour’s memories. It was too painful for Witching Hour to bear and she begged Celestia to make the nightmare end so that she might find some peace.”

“She’s still a raving mess… randomly shouting in the middle of a sentence,” Grimglammer said as she felt a feeling of pity settle into her mind. “It is unnerving to be around her for any length of time.”

“Her whole life has been betrayal, death, and danger. It is surprising she still functions as well as she does,” Luna responded as she reached out a wing and touched Grimglammer. “Never forget, she survived the purge of the Black Cloaks as well her betrayal in Trottingham… both she and Tiddlywinks. They lived where hundreds of others died. This speaks volumes of her abilities, her capability as a Black Cloak, and she has proven time and time again that she is a staunch protector of Equestria.”

Staring out into the starry blackness, Grimglammer did not reply. They were approaching clouds. Still off in the distance, the clouds had a silver hue in the moonlight and starlight, they were dark below and became lighter near the tops where the faint lights of the night shone down upon them, giving them the promised silver lining.

“The moon is only half full,” Luna stated as she stared up at her night sky.

Nodding, Grimglammer silently agreed.

“I strongly suspect that this colt will be a full unicorn when the new moon comes around and is a black disc lost in the night sky to all except for those who know how to look for it,” Luna speculated.

“And when the full moon comes around again, do you believe he will be a lunar pegasus once more?” Grimglammer inquired as the wind whipped her mane around her face and neck.

Nodding her head, Luna angled her gaze downwards to look at the foal hung in the sling that was looped over her neck. “Yes. I do believe he will follow the cycle of the moon.”

“Funny how magic works,” Grimglammer sighed, She stuck out one wing and gave it a flap to relieve a cramp in her central knuckle, a painful reminder of an old battle injury.

Saying nothing, Luna found herself in agreement. There was still so much they did not know. New and wondrous things, miraculous things, new discoveries. Even Luna, who had lived for a very long time, could still be surprised by random facets of magic that appeared, previously unknown and now begging to be studied. Magic still had deep dark depths which waited to be explored.

“Will you allow Twilight Sparkle to examine him?” Grimglammer inquired as she continued to flex her wing. Audible clicks and pops could be heard from the knuckle and she waggled her grasping digit in a small circle.

Still distracted, Luna thought about Grimglammer’s question for a few moments. “In time. For now, I want to bond with him. I find myself filled with a desire to keep him close.”

“Mommy hormones. Getting your teat milk flowing filled your body with a cocktail of all manner of hormones. You are going to notice some changes in your mood. As a physician and your friend, might I recommend taking a little time to yourself and allow this bond to happen?” Grimglammer responded as she looked over at Luna and saw she was staring down at the foal.

“I intend to. I will pass some of my tasks on to others. I think I will spend some time in Ponyville,” Luna answered in a somewhat uncertain voice. “I will take this time to bond and reflect upon my inner darkness as well. Perhaps sort out a few issues. Find some way to break the cycle, so to speak.”

Drawing near Luna, Grimglammer leaned her head down to have a look at the foal, who was now waking up and yawning. “Have you thought about a name for this colt?”

Smiling a soft smile that revealed the edges of her teeth, Luna nodded. “I do believe I shall call him Erebus.”

Chapter 4

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Princess Celestia, hearing that her sister had returned during the night, hurried down the hallway towards her sister’s quarters, her wings fluttering at her sides with anticipation. Luna had returned with a foal, or so Celestia had heard from Raven and Kibitz.

Offering a respectful nod to the lunar pegasi guards at the door of her sister’s chambers as she passed, Celestia pushed the doors opened and entered the darkened room of her sister.

Igniting her horn so that it produced a soft light, she approached a small crib that had been placed near Luna’s bed. It was empty. Heaving a disappointed sigh, Celestia looked around the room and then approached Luna’s bed. She heard Luna let out a half awake moan as she approached. Luna had fallen asleep on top of the blankets yet again, as she usually did when she was exhausted.

And then, Celestia saw the foal at her sister’s side. Soft grey in colour. She saw the small wings but failed to notice the horn peeking out from the tuft of electric blue mane. Celestia inhaled sharply.

“Oh my… you’re so precious… I’m going to steal you away and cuddle you!” Celestia said in a rather loud whisper. Sniffing, her nose crinkled. “You need a diaper change first though.”

“Steal my foal away and Nightmare Moon will be the least of your concerns. Prepare for Nightmare Mommy,” Luna growled. She lifted her head, yawned, looked at her sister, and then sniffed. “Phew,” she gasped.

“Luna… sister, we use the word ‘auntie’ for a reason-”

“Do not lecture me,” Luna hissed grumpily. “Try having a foal suckle blood from your teats and then get back to me about about proper titles.”

Lifting her head up high, Celestia looked at her sister in concern. “I will change him for you,” Celestia offered as Luna yawned once more.

“No,” Luna whispered. “I’ll do it. This is my responsibility.”

Feeling a strange new sense of concern, Celestia watched as Luna rose from the bed, lifted the foal in her magic, and then went off into the bathroom to change the soiled diaper. Celestia was aware that Luna had changed, something was certainly different about Luna, and Celestia now felt a sense of worry for her sister.

“Suckle blood?” Celestia asked.

“Lunar pegasus,” Luna said from within the bathroom.

“Oh… I see,” Celestia replied as she heard water running.

“Right now he is more unicorn though, except for his teeth,” Luna said. “But I think those are shrinking… either that or I’ve lost sensation in my teats.”

“What?” Celestia asked, now feeling very, very confused by Luna’s words.

“Give me time sister, I will explain everything once this diaper is changed,” Luna promised in reply.


Feeling very puzzled, Princess Celestia looked at her sister, feeling very befuddled by everything that Luna had just explained to her. She looked at the foal, who was awake now, and then back at her sister, who was yawning. Looking at the foal once more, Celestia noted the unusual yellow-green eyes. The stubby nub of a horn. The small stunted wings. The tufted ears which didn’t seem quite as tufted as most lunar pegasi foals.

“So he is changing into a unicorn,” Celestia stated as she continued to peer at the colt.

“Yes sister,” Luna replied as she yawned once more.

“But you believe he will change back to a lunar pegasus once more,” Celestia said as she blinked in amazement. She pulled her eyes away from the foal and looked at Luna.

Nodding, Luna blearily blinked at her sister.

“You named him Erebus,” Celestia remarked as she once more looked at the foal.

Luna did not reply. She lay her head down upon a cushion and placed one wing protectively over Erebus, who had fed while she and her sister were talking. The bedspread was now flecked with blood. At Luna’s side, the foal yawned once.

“Tourmaline is going to talk my ear off over this,” Celestia stated.

“From this point on, Tourmaline is not to call me ‘auntie’ anymore. I will be her mother. You may hold on to that notion if you wish, but I have since had a change of heart,” Luna mumbled in a sleepy voice.

“Luna… sister… please, it is easier to say that you have lost a niece or a nephew when they die of old age,” Celestia whispered in warning.

“The effect is still the same! A word is but a word… the meaning is still the same… I do not understand how you can delude yourself about the meaning of something just by changing a word,” Luna retorted angrily as she lifted her head.

“I have found that it softens the blow,” Celestia confessed in a sad voice.

“I would rather have the pain. At least pain is real and is not a softly spoken lie,” Luna snarled angrily. “You keep Tourmaline distant from you. You have her looked after by nannies and caretakers. You step in and you spend time with her in carefully measured doses, thinking this will soften the blow when the time comes… I’ve seen your nightmares. You allowed yourself to get closer to Twilight than any of your previous students. But you live in fear of the pain. You keep the best parts of yourself distant from Tourmaline to spare yourself. You may continue to do so… I have no desire to withhold myself any longer. I have no desire to cheat her out of the experience of knowing me, wholly and completely.”

Overwhelmed with emotion, Celestia shook her head. “I should go. You need sleep. We shall talk later. I am sorry that I woke you, but I could not resist. Rest well Luna… and pleasant dreams Erebus.”

“Have a pleasant day sister,” Luna replied as she closed her eyes.


Haunted by her sister’s words, Celestia found that she could not think, could not focus, and that her sense of distraction was too much to bear. She had allowed Twilight to come closer to her than any other foal… she had hoped that Twilight Sparkle looking at her as a mother figure would prevent the mistakes made with Sunset Shimmer.

Might Twilight have turned out even better if Celestia had not held part of herself back?

The question burned in her mind. Fearful, full of doubt, Celestia did not know who to turn to. Luna was sleeping and there was nopony else she trusted with these sorts of thoughts.

What of Tourmaline?

Celestia’s lips contorted into an uncomfortable moue as she thought of Tourmaline. A creature dependant upon love. A changeling. Yet Celestia held back her love, at least part of it anyway, guarding her heart closely. How might Tourmaline benefit if Celestia held nothing back? The white alicorn did not know.


Tourmaline’s room was well lit; sunny, and the jet black foal with soft pink mane was busy listening to her tutor, Meadow Moth, patiently explain the founding of Equestria. When Celestia entered, Tourmaline squealed, then immediately bolted away from Meadow Moth to run over to Celestia, and began rubbing up against Celestia’s legs with excited foalish affection.

“Meadow Moth, if you could give us a little time,” Celestia requested.

“Sure thing, Majesty,” the pegasus mare responded as she rose out of her seat. She smiled. “I’ll return later,” she said as she exited the room.

Moving over to a large comfortable couch, Celestia settled herself onto it and then made a gesture for Tourmaline to sit beside her. The foal, eager to spend time with Celestia, jumped up and laid down right away without hesitation.

“You are happy-sad,” Tourmaline said as she settled in beside Celestia.

“I suppose I am,” Celestia admitted to the foal.

“Is Auntie Moon Drops back from Trotter-whatever?” Tourmaline asked as she cuddled up against Celestia.

Nodding, Celestia wrapped her wing around Tourmaline and pulled her closer. “Luna is back from Trottingham. She has brought you home a baby brother.”

“What?” Tourmaline responded as she began blinking rapidly. “Can I see him?”

“Later,” Celestia promised. “I wanted to speak with you.”

“I like talking with you,” Tourmaline stated.

“I know Tourmaline… how would you feel about calling me ‘mother’ instead of ‘auntie’ and spending more time with me?” Celestia questioned, her voice becoming low and raspy from her emotions.

“It is making you sad to say this,” Tourmaline whispered.

“There is no hiding any feelings from you,” Celestia responded and then sighed.

“You’re afraid of something,” Tourmaline said as she rubbed her face against Celestia’s side. “You’re afraid of pain.”

“There is just no hiding anything from you, is there?” Celestia huffed, feeling somewhat annoyed by Tourmaline’s advantages.

“Now you feel grumpy,” Tourmaline stated.

Taking a deep breath, Celestia tried to bring her emotions under control. “Tourmaline, how do you feel about Luna and I being your parents rather than just your guardians?”

“I would like that very much,” Tourmaline replied as she peered up at Celestia through her now crooked green framed eyeglasses.

Using her magic, Celestia carefully straightened out Tourmaline’s glasses and set them straight upon the foal’s face. Stretching out her neck, she craned her head downwards and kissed Tourmaline on the tip of her nose. Lifting her head back up, Celestia looked at Tourmaline and smiled. “You are very dear to me… I love you a great deal.”

“So I can call you ‘mama’ now?” Tourmaline asked.

“Yes my little cuddlebug, you may call me that. Or any other term of affection that you might choose,” Celestia replied as she blinked away a few tears.

“Stop being sad,” Tourmaline begged as she looked up at the alicorn with teary eyes.

“Yes Tourmaline, it is time for me to finally be happy,” Celestia responded in a voice raspy with emotion. She hugged the changeling foal close and planted another kiss on Tourmaline, on the cheek this time. As her lips touched Tourmaline, Celestia noticed a bright flash of light that originated from beneath her wing.

Lifting her wing, Celestia stared in wonder at what she saw beneath.

“I have a cutie mark,” Tourmaline gasped as she stared around at her own backside, trying to investigate the source of the flash herself. She blinked through her glasses at what she saw. “I don’t understand what it means.”

Looking down at the winged staff covered in twining ivy vines, Celestia studied it for a moment. “This is a caduceus. It is a healer’s symbol from ancient times. I haven’t seen one of these in centuries,” she said in a low voice.

“Hmmph, I already knew I was a healer,” Tourmaline stated as she continued to stare.

Lowering her wing, Celestia silently contemplated the foal that she had grown to love. As far as Celestia knew, changelings didn’t get cutie marks, but Tourmaline was not the common changeling. She was exceptional, different, did not have holes riddling her body, Tourmaline was her own individual with her own mind, not connected to Chrysalis’ hive mind collective.

It was further evidence that changelings, at least in their unaltered form, were ponies.


Smiling serenely at Tourmaline, Luna waited for the foal to approach her. She watched as Tourmaline took tiny, almost dainty, little steps towards the bed, peering through her thick lenses that almost made the foal look owlish.

“Your cutie mark suits you,” Luna said in a soft voice.

“Thank you,” Tourmaline whispered in reply as she drew near.

“This is Erebus… your brother,” Luna said, introducing Tourmaline to her sibling.

Standing at the edge of the bed, Tourmaline rest her chin upon the comforter and peered at the foal at Luna’s side. “Hi Erebus,” she chirped in a happy voice.

“Come up here Tourmaline,” Luna invited in a soft voice. “Come and sit with your mother and your brother for a while.”

Leaping up, Tourmaline got her front hooves up on the bed and then crawled up the rest of the way. She lay down near Luna, stretched out her neck, and then nosed Erebus, who gurgled at the touch. She watched as Erebus yawned and then she looked at Luna. “He’s cute.”

“I am glad that you think so,” Luna said as she pressed her cheek against Tourmaline’s cheek and rubbed softly.

“You're hurt… I can heal that,” Tourmaline offered.

“In a while,” Luna responded. “I believe I am already healing from past wounds.”

“I don’t understand,” Tourmaline replied.

“It doesn’t matter. One day I will explain,” Luna promised.

“Okay,” Tourmaline answered as she snuggled a little closer to Luna.

“Is there room for me?” Celestia asked as she stood near the bed.

“We can make room,” Luna replied as she smiled at her sister. “Come sister. Let us spend time with one another before I must begin my duties for the evening.”