> Empty Lake, Full Sky > by Shaud > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- > The Empty Lake > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- The the night was clear and cold, with a crisp breeze. It was late enough that there was little traffic, but still too early for the night life of the city to be put to bed. A girl with red and orange hair limped down a quiet, dark street by herself. Her hair was matted with sweat, her clothes were tattered and torn, and yet her face remained blank. She tried to push out all of her thoughts, refusing to think about her failure. Her feet seemed to move of their own accord, leading her down the street towards a place she only had an idea of in the back of her mind. I'm such a failure. she thought to herself, I can't do anything but make a mess. Twilight Sparkle really does deserve that crown. Tears fell from her eyes, but she paid no attention to them. Emotions now were useless; all she felt was an icey numbness. When her feet finally stopped, she realized with a sinking heart that she had walked across the city and into the Everfree forest. In front of her was a silver lake that reflected the clear night-time sky. The illusion made it seem empty. She had been here twice before, being comforted by a familiar-yet-not sight. Tonight she would find comfort here once again. Celestia was right. I'm not destined for greatness. She fell onto her knees, a soft sob escaping her throat. The pain of rejection made her body feel as heavy as lead. So what good am I? She couldn't think of anything to keep her going. She had no family, no friends, not even her high school following. She was alone. Twilight had tried to pass on her friends to her, but Sunset could see the hate and even fear on their faces whenever they saw her. And it had been a week since the formal... She wasn't escaping this one. I'm dangerous. She thought to herself, Dangerous to myself, and to others. I can't ask Twilight's friends to put up with me. I don't deserve forgiveness. She looked up at where the moon was. It shone down on her calmly and quietly, not unlike Luna's moon, and yet still not the same. She glanced out towards the lake and considered what she would do from there. There's no way I can go back. She thought, But I don't think I could start over... Not again... She sighed, exhausted, Maybe... Everyone would be better off without me? This thought made her heart skip a beat. With another look at the lake, she figured No one would miss me. They would be glad that I was gone. These thoughts had crossed her mind before. Sometimes it had seemed like just giving up would be the best option, but she had never thought of... Actually going through with it. Only when the bitter cold hit her did she realize she had taken off her jacket. Or, rather, the torn scrap of faux leather that her jacket had become. She stared, shocked, at the garment she held in her hands.Her socks and shoes followed, and were put in a pile with the jacket. I'm sorry, Twilight. And Applejack. And Rarity. And Fluttershy. And Rainbow Dash. And Pinkie Pie. She made a mental list to herself, of everyone she had wronged, as she walked towards the shimmering water. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry. As the list grew into the tens of people, she stepped a foot into the water. A few minutes later she found herself in the middle of a freezing cold lake, staring up at the moon.I'm sorry, Celestia. She swam through the water lethargically, exhausting her already tried body. She felt her muscles seize up before going numb, and she gasped for air. Never before had she realized how much her body desired oxygen, but at that moment, as her head dipped below the water, she realized how important those small molecules were to living creatures. But it was too late now. Even if she wanted to, her body was too tired to fight. The stale air in her lungs made her body burn almost as much as the attack she had earlier endured. Tears streamed from her eyes and disappeared into the water around her as she slowly lost consciousness. A good distance away, there was a splash as someone jumped into the water after her. > The Full Sky > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- The water burned coming back up. Two figures crouched over Sunset's body as she threw up the water in her stomach and lungs. Sunset coughed and sputtered as someone rubbed her back. W-what--? Her thoughts were clouded, and her body felt too weak to protest the tenderness. "Sunset! Can you hear me?" Applejack's voice pierced her mind, and she suddenly remembered what she had done. She groaned in response, sucking in air. She felt greedy, oddly enough, for breathing in so much. "Thank God." She heard another voice, Rainbow Dash's, say. "What the hell were you thinking?!" She could feel Applejack's glare over her head, and Rainbow went silent. Surely that girl wasn't that daft. The farmer, however, took off her jacket and placed it on Sunset's shoulders. "It'll be alright now, Sunset." The other orange girl shook her head sadly, a mix of shame at what she had done and defiance at the duo for stopping her. She wanted to say something, a harsh rebuttal, or a jab of some sort, but her throat was too sore and her mind too murky. "C'mon," Rainbow said solemnly, "You need a doctor." Fear shot through Sunset, a cold chill that rivaled the feel of her soaking clothes. "No." She said, despite the immense pain it caused her, "No doc-" She gagged again, but nothing came up. Her stomach was empty, but the pure fear that came with her realization of what she just did made her dry heave for several moments. "Ah understand if you don't wanna see a doctor," Applejack said gently, "But at least let me take ya back to my place. Cheerilee is there, and she'll know what to do." There was a tone of authority in her voice, and Sunset was too weak to protest anyways. "Okay." She said weakly. She offered no more protest, and Applejack picked her up slowly while Rainbow gathered her jacket and boots. Together they made their way back to Applejack's place. Sunset sniffled and buried her face in the crook of Applejack's neck. Once again she felt she had failed, and once again she had burdened others with her problems. As if reading her thoughts, Applejack pressed her cheek to the top of Sunset's hair and whispered, "Things will get better. Ah promise. Element 'o Honesty, remember?" In response, Sunset gripped Applejack's jacket tighter and nodded. "Sorry." She mumbled weakly. "Don't go apologizin' to us. We're sorry fer not paying attention to your troubles." Applejack's tone changed slightly, "Maybe, if we had actually taken the princess's advice, ya wouldn't have had it so badly." "We should have known you were having a hard time." Rainbow offered, "We were just too busy remembering how awful you used to be to give the new you a chance." Sunset winced. "Not that I can blame you." She glanced up at the sky, suddenly wanting to see the stars again. She realized she had been very close to never seeing the sky again. That thought alone made her stomach tighten again, but she shook off the thought. "We've all made mistakes." Applejack said finally, "Now we all have to work to fix this." The other two nodded, and were silent until Applejack's house came into view. Sunset had just begun wondering if she was going to get sick from the little... event when she sneezed. And then sneezed again. "She's already got a fever." Rainbow said, having reached over and pressed a hand to Sunset's forehead , "Let's hurry up and get her inside." Above them the full sky seemed to blur, and Sunset had to close her eyes as Applejack picked up the pace. Her full on fear turned to worry and she wondered what was going to happen to her when they reached the house. > The Empty Head > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- When they reached the Apple house, Sunset was almost overwhelmed with the thick smells coming from the house. It smelled like one of the feasts back in Equestria that Sunset had always tried to sneak away from. Apples, dough, meat... Okay, that last one was different, but not altogether unpleasant. "Cheerilee!" Rainbow ran ahead into the dining room while Applejack set Sunset in a sitting position on the floor, in front of a roaring fire, and wrapped a large quilt around her. Both girls' clothes were wet, causing them both to shiver, but Applejack didn't stop until Cheerilee took over. Sunset was shivering so bad that her teeth chattered. She realized numbly that she still had Applejack's jacket clutched to her chest, the only completely warm thing on her body. "Oh, you poor things!" Cheerilee sat next to Sunset and looked her over. "Big Mac, go start a hot bath. Rainbow, Applejack, change into some different clothes and then come back and help me in here." The teacher turned to Sunset when the others were gone. "We need to get you out of those clothes." Any other time and I would have made a 'teacher on student' joke. Sunset thought to herself, but at that moment she could barely breathe, let alone be snarky. The next thing she knew, Cheerilee had stripped her down to her underwear and wrapped the quilt back around her. Cheerilee seemed more distraught then than she had at the beginning, but Sunset couldn't understand why. She didn't have the strength to ask. "Whaddya need help with now?" Applejack was back, dressed in her pajamas. Rainbow wasn't far behind wearing an over-sized T-shirt of Big Mac's and basketball shorts. "We need to get her upstairs. Big Mac! That bath ready?" "Eeyup!" "Applejack, can you carry her upstairs?" The blonde teen nodded, picking up Sunset once again and maneuvering her through the living room and to the stairs. "M-m-my hero." Sunset smiled weakly, causing Applejack to laugh. The others hadn't heard her. Cheerilee leaned over and whispered something in Applejack's ear, causing the blonde girl's eyes to widen. Applejack nodded, and Sunset had no idea what the teacher had said but was too tired to care. When they got to the top of the stairs Applejack swapped places with Big Mac, who politely left the room and shut the door behind him. "Cheerilee says ya need a hot bath ta keep yer temperature up." Applejack stood Sunset on her feet, but the other girl had a hard time staying up. B-bath?Sunset thought, her mind growing fuzzy again, a-as in w-water? Despite her original feelings towards drowning, Sunset began to fear the possibility of going near water again. Drowning had hurt, God dammit! That, and now she was beginning to doubt the credibility of her original motives. Applejack must have seen the worried look on her face because she wrapped her arms around the shorter girl and looked her in the eyes. "Hey, no need to worry. I've got ya." She smiled, and Sunset smiled back. Tentatively, Applejack took the blanket from Sunset and helped her into the bath, keeping her underwear on. Sunset hissed as the hot water hit her skin, but after a moment she leaned back into the water. Her breathing became easier and she finally stopped shivering. She crossed her arms over her stomach and closed her eyes with a grimace. At the time she had done it, she was so sure that ending her life was the best solution to her problem. She thought that no one would miss her, especially not Applejack and Rainbow of all people. Now, however, she saw that she was wrong. She was surprised that they had cared enough to fish her out of the lake. Add on to the fact that Cheerilee had helped her without batting an eye... How did I screw up again? She wondered, exasperated, There really isn't anything I can do right, is there? A knock at the door made her open her tired eyes. Applejack jumped up and answered the knock. Sunset heard Cheerilee's voice, but couldn't quite make out the words. After a moment Applejack left, and Cheerilee walked in, looking uncertain. "Sunset Shimmer," She asked gently, "When was the last time you ate?" As in, food? Sunset blinked at the question. "T-taco Tuesday." She she said simply. Cheerilee's eyes widened, and Sunset was confused. What was so bad about Taco Tuesday? "It's Friday, Sunset. Are you telling me you haven't eaten in three days?" "Uh, yeah." Sunset's hoarse voice was barely above a whisper, "That's not that long, is it? I've gone longer." She couldn't understand why Cheerilee seemed so upset about this. Maybe it was because she was still suffering from lack of oxygen, but Cheerilee's worry seemed so misplaced directed at her. "Sunset, most people eat three meals a day." Well, shit. Yup. Lack of oxygen to the brain. Sunset's eyebrows drew together. "Oh." Was all she said in response. She looked down at her crossed arms and realized why Cheerilee looked so concerned. Her stomach looked hallow, and her ribs and collar bone stuck out sharply. It was obvious she didn't eat well. She hadn't really noticed herself, especially not since looking in a mirror began to terrify her... Too bad therapy was so expensive. "Well, when you're done in here we're get you some fresh clothes and some food." She seemed to want to say more, but shook her head. Sunset sighed. Once again she was being a burden on others. She began to remember why she wanted to die. It seemed that this whole night was just an echo of all the reasons she believed she was worthless. A knock at the door interrupted her thoughts, and Applejack stepped in with a change of clothes. Several moments later Sunset found herself at a table covered in leftovers. Apple pies, salads, soups... They all looked delicious and made her stomach growl. "These are all of the vegetarian dishes we had." Applejack seemed apologetic, which made Sunset laugh. With a glance at the table, the others began to laugh as well. "Maybe it'll be enough." Applejack teased. As Sunset began to eat, the others were in and out of the kitchen, never leaving her alone. Which made sense, all things considered. Applejack and Cheerilee kept disappearing together, which made her think they were up to something. For the moment, though, she didn't care. She had a full belly and a warm place to be. If this is what friendship is... It's not so bad... She laid her head down on the table with these thoughts, and soon drifted off to sleep.