Some Things Cannot Be Undone
You wipe the sweat off your brow and attempt to stretch the soreness from your bones as you head back home to Carousel Boutique. The extra hours of work at the Apple's farm have been strenuous, but it's all worth it for your new daughter on the way.
Rarity has entered the stage where she seems to glow with beauty and since she's a seamstress, she's still been able to work on her projects and make some extra income. The little bit of savings that the two of you worked for is going towards the baby's new nursery that you have been building with her. You've already cleared out the room and it shouldn't be too much longer until it's complete.
The idea of walking your new daughter to school everyday puts a stupid grin on your face that you can't wipe off. Excited to see your wife and feel the baby bump, you quicken your pace to return home.
When the Ponyville's signature boutique is in sight, you wonder if you should grab something special for Rarity today. Her cravings have been really crazy lately. You wouldn't dare mention what it's doing to her figure. You had to make sure you didn't dare use a phrase even close to 'child bearing flank'. However, you wouldn't have it any other way. Placing your hand on the handle, you pause and smile to yourself.
Life is great.
What more could you possibly ask for? A loving wife. A beautiful home. Your first born on her way soon.
You open up the door and proudly call out to the home "Honey! I'm home!"
Instantly, the white unicorn calls back in excitement.
"Daaarling! You wouldn't believe the great news I had today!"
Rarity comes galloping into the room and leaps into your arms with a smile of pride adorned on her face. Her beautiful azure eyes locked into yours in-
Wait. Galloping? She leaped into your arms? What?
"Hoity Toity came by and said he wanted to fashion a brand new line in Manehattan by none other than me! So I've been spending all day working on some new concepts that I know they would just die for!" Rarity leaps off of you and giggles like a school filly. Rarity hasn't had this sort of energy in months. "Oh! That reminds me. I took our little savings and used them to get two tickets to Manehattan for the weekend of the fashion show. It's such a marvelous opportunity, I'm sure you wouldn't mind."
The pit of your stomach drops.
"O-our savings?" you ask, the wind being knocked out of you. Your blood runs cold as you begin to calculate the pieces of the puzzle in your head.
"Well I mean it's not like it was being used for anything really important. Plus I knew you would support the decision that would help me reach my dream! To be a top fashion designer in Canterlot!"
She looks towards the ceiling with stars in her eyes and confidence in her step. Your fists ball up and you feel yourself losing your temper fast.
"Rarity. I earned that money for our child,” you growl through grit teeth.
The stars quickly leave Rarity's eyes and they dart from side to side.
“Oh... right," she says quietly, as if she didn't expect your reaction. She turns away from you and carefully inspects the train tickets.
"What the hell is that supposed to mean? Did you just forget that you were pregnant? I mean I'd imagine that you couldn't just give up everything we've worked for our little girl. How could you just forget about Amethyst!?!"
"Amethyst?" she asks quietly but flatly. You take a step back.
"Well. Yeah. I mean, I know we didn't decide on a name yet... but I thought it would be perfect. I mean, a purple gem." She turns slowly and sets the train tickets on a table.
"I... thought you might understand,” she whispers. You rub your face with your hands.
"I understand that this is a great opportunity for your career and I'm happy you decided to follow it, but I just wish you would have talked to me about it before you jumped the gun. I'm sure we can work it out. As long as you don't go into labor on the trip, then we'll be fine. Who will be modeling it?"
Rarity's face sinks and her eyes trace the grooves of the tile floor.
"I am," she whispers. You look up at her, curious.
"You are going to be modeling it? Is it a pregnancy line? That's a weird-"
"She's gone, Anon," Rarity says.
The room goes silent and you feel a knife in your throat. Breathing becomes an excruciatingly hard task to perform.
"What do you mean?" you ask with fear. You knew exactly what she meant. You knew exactly what each word meant, but when they were placed in that order, you had no idea what they meant.
"I had to rid of her, Anon," says Rarity, her voice beginning to break. “I did it this morning.”
You stand in silence, a world between you and your wife. The world feels as if it stops turning.
"No." You pace the room and you feel your body heat up. "No." Tears come to your eyes. "No. I'm going to pretend that you didn't just say that. That you didn't just say... what I thought you said."
"It's the truth Anon... I need to look-"
"How dare you?" you interrupt her.
Her attempt to explain set off the bomb. Your heart felt as if it was screaming in agony, begging for this to be some sort of terrible nightmare. You've never once cursed in front of your wife, unless you hurt yourself. However, any sort of mental filter for your words was burned alive and it's ashes were spread to the wind.
"How dare you?!" you scream at the white unicorn. Rarity's mouth hangs open as you verbally assault her and the flames of your anger breathe into an inferno. "THAT WAS OUR CHILD! A LIFE! OUR FLESH AND BLOOD! HOW COULD YOU GO DO THIS WITHOUT EVEN THINKING OF-" you stutter and your voice breaks. "I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT TO SAY TO YOU!"
Stomping out of the room, you head upstairs to the nursery.
"Anonymous..." Rarity quietly says as she follows you.
"Shut up,” you retort flatly. “Just don't say a damn thing.”
You open the door to the nursery. Rarity picked out the color herself, a gentle violet that wouldn't make the room too dark at night. There wasn't much in there, Rarity didn't have many shower guests, but the one item of importance was the crib. You picked up the wood yourself and went to the local carpenter for instruction. Each piece of wood was hand cut by yourself so that there wouldn't be a need for screws. You sanded each individual piece for hours on end until there was no chance for splintering. Lastly you hand painted every detail by brush with a custom varnish that would match the room. In the middle of the room, it sits proudly.
New dresses and cut fabric hanging off the side of it.
The entire nursery became Rarity's work space for her new project, the walls being covered in blueprints of new designs and color swatches pinned side by side. The room, once filled with toys and stuffed animals, is covered in Rarity's fashion. You step inside as if you were exploring a room you never knew existed in the house.
"Anon,” Rarity tries to say. Your body grows numb with each step into the room that the two of you created together.
"What... did you do..." you ask with what little strength you have left.
"Anon... I'm-" she tries, but you interrupt her.
"How could you just do this and get over it in just... hours,” you ask. You fall to your knees in front of the crib, running your hand up the smooth wooden frame.
"Anon... I thought you would support what I wanted. I thought we could just try again," she mentions weakly.
Running your hand down the wood that you painstakingly sanded, gotten countless splinters and bled over, you turn to her.
"What you wanted?" you ask quietly. Slowly you stand up and take a step towards her, fear overcomes her face again. "I thought this..." you extend your arms to the room, "was what WE wanted."
Rarity opens her mouth, but can't manage to make a sound.
"We agreed we wanted to have a little one. Together. We tried hard to scrimp and save to make this work. The doctors said we might not even be able to make this work and you are telling me... that I should be supporting what you wanted?” you ask her.
“Anon-" she cries desperately.
"WELL WHAT ABOUT WHAT I WANTED! HUH!?! IF YOU WON'T THINK ABOUT US, WHAT ABOUT ME?" you ask, the anger welling within you reaching it's tipping point. Taking one of the many dresses, you toss it to the ground viciously. The unicorn closes her mouth, tears in her eyes. "BUT OF COURSE NOT. IT'S NEVER ABOUT ME. IT'S ALWAYS ABOUT YOU AND YOUR FUCKING LIFE. YOU FUCKING SELF-CENTERED BITCH."
Rarity slowly lowers herself to the ground and blinks a tear out.
"Anon... I'm so sorry. I wasn't thinking. I just saw the opportunity and thought-"
"Well you fucking thought wrong,” you interrupt her.
You walk out of the ex-nursery and into the bedroom that the two of you slept in. Grabbing a bag, you rip out your clothes out the drawers and you throw them haphazardly into the bag.
"Fucking ... ugh. I can't believe this,” you whisper under your breath.
You stifle a wave of sadness and tears and shove your belongings into the bag harder. Maybe Twilight could put you up for a night or two or something. Your clouded mind makes it hard to think straight. You zip the bag closed so hard that it nearly snaps. Then, grabbing the bag, you attempt to push yourself out of your living hell when the bag gets caught on the door.
"God damn it!” you scream in frustration. You pull it off forcefully and the door hits the wall, leaving a dent. Walking back down the hall, you glance in at Rarity who gently pulls her designer clothing off of your crib. The crib for Amethyst. Disgust fills your stomach and she turns to you. Her face fills with fear as you head back downstairs.
"No! Anon, wait!" she calls to you.
"I'm done," you say flatly and without turning to her. You head towards the door and she sprints towards you.
"Anon, wait! please!" she cries out, despair filling her voice.
"No. I'm fucking done,” you bluntly reply. She leaps towards you and grabs onto your leg, tears staining your work jeans.
"Please... Anon." Her voice breaks. "I'll do anything... I'm so sorry. Don't go,”
You lean down towards her, mere inches from her face. The face you would kiss tenderly. The face you would hold close to your warm chest on cold rainy nights.
"Bring. My baby. Back," you whisper to her spitefully.
Kicking her off of you, you open the door and slam it behind you, leaving her to her regret.