Show MUST Go On!

by Magenta Cat

First published

We all know Trixie but, have you ever wondered how she came to be? Trixie herself answer this, to who may be her last audience in what could be her last chance of telling a story.

Trixie Silverlight Lulamoon, successful magician extraordinaire. Have you ever wondered how she came to be?

What kind of life could make a pony like Trixie? How a pony, who lives in the land of peace and harmony, could become a confrontational showmare with relationship problems? Why such a confident mare like her is now walking alone under the rain?

One last chance, one last scenario and one last audience. Follow Trixie in what could be her last story.


The thing is that recently I received a fairly bad new. It struck me very bad. Bad enough to put all of my stories on hiatus. Since then I haven't written anything, till today. Let's see if the old horse can ride again.

Please show no mercy on the comments. Compassion is good for the broken, but it's through the strongest fire that steel is best forged (or something like that, I'm not good at translations).

Tuning instruments, soundcheck.

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-In the road leaving Canterlot, under the rain.

It's one of those nights. You know which one, one of those when the rain is smoothly falling, like a heavenly lullaby that whispers in the ground. The soft sounds of the water hitting the stone road sing their song. It is the calm beat of nature, trying to bring peace to the world. At the same time it's a war drum, setting the pace of warriors to their battlefield. Playing the same song of the rain, a set of hooves is carrying a pony down the road.

It's a mare, a unicorn around her twenties or so. She's wearing a single cover from the weather, a simple black cape that serves to cover her face too with a hood. A strong wind and a well-timed lightning reveal her body. A body worth mentioning. One of those bodies that would make a young cheerleader run into the library and rethinks her career choice. Her silvery mane an tail not succumbing to the water's pull, but instead calmly dancing with every soft push from the wind.

Hanging her head low, she keeps her pace heading south. The glorious metropolis that is Canterlot at her back as she keeps walking, heading to a very specific place. Just some meters from the city's limit, there's a coffee shop. It isn't the happiest place in Equestria, but at least it has a roof and wall to shelter a pony from the rain. The azure unicorn puts a hoof over the main door, not really moving it.

In a better day, she would have pushed both doors wide open with a flash of her magic, making sure that every single pony around would know her name by shouting it out loud to the four winds. In a better day, instead of an old black leather cape, she would be wearing a hat and cape combination, made out of enchanted silk, worthy of a magician. In a better day, she wouldn't be even near to here, but where she belongs. In a better day, she would be on stage, bringing hope and illusion to the world.

In a better day, long lost beyond her memory, she would be motivated to do something more than just standing under the rain, too afraid of even entering a public place.

She shakes her head, trying to get rid of that feeling. That cold thing happening in her stomach that tells her that it's not worth to even get out of bed anymore. She shakes the feeling and, letting out a breath she didn't know she was holding, finally opens the door and slowly walks in.

"There she is, right on time." The pony behind the bar greets her. It the first time in hours that someone says something at the silver manned pony. It's not precisely Shakespeare, but it's something.

"Hi there Berry, got my order?" She replies, not wanting to say more that the strictly necessary.

"The usual, dear, hay and carrots with a diet cola." 'Berry' handed her a plastic tray holding the meal. It was ready some minutes ago, waiting for the same pony who keeps ordering the same meal every single night at the same hour. "Hope you cleaned your hooves this time."

"Yes ma'am." The azure unicorn playfully replies to the joke. She doesn't want to say more than necessary, but Berry is also one of the few ponies who she can speak to, and she values it. The azure mare tries to grab a ketchup bottle near to her. "Thank yo--" But the tiredness and the fact she’s not even looking, makes her miss and the bottle is pushed to the floor. The unicorn's horn briefly flashes, as if trying to cast a levitation spell.

*krttch*

But it isn't fast enough. It isn't strong enough. It isn't good enough. The bottle hits the floor and shatters, spreading the content on the floor.

"I'm sorry."

"Don't worry sweetie, Lucky will clean that. Lucky!"

The mare lets Berry to fade from her attention. Something else is in her mind now. She looks around, finding another bottle over a table next to the windows. Balancing her tray on her back, she heads to the table, but stops once she sees there's a pony already sitting there. Hesitating for a moment, she finally asks.

"Mind if I..."

"Suit yourself." The stranger replies. "I could use some company after all." Her voice is from a mare.

The unicorn sits down, taking the ketchup and pouring it over her sandwich. Not wanting to be rude, she talks to her new companion. "I think I've already seen you here, how many times? At least a dozen over the last two weeks." Pausing to take a sip from her drink. "Always at four A.M., my lunchtime."

"Mine too." The other mare puts an ice cube on her coffee. "Night shift, eh? It can be a real killer."

"It usually is."

"It's making me unable to sleep in the dark, sunrise makes feel tired..." She stops herself. "Sorry, I'm only complaining."

"Don't worry, it still beats no having a conversation at all. Do you have a name, lady?"

"Trixie..." Yawning. "...Lulamoon. You can call me Lulamoon."

"Lulamoon. I've heard that name before." The mare finally leans over in interest. "Are you some kind of celebrity?"

"Barely." Trixie answers. "But now I'm mechanical for the Royal Guard."

"He, and how's that?"

"Terrible. I hate the hours, from eight at night to six in the morning, and the payment just doesn't worth it. But it was all I could get since... Well, it's a long story."

"Don't cha worry, mate. I got a good hour before lunchtime is over and I like a good story." The other mare took a long sip of her coffee. "Go ahead, tell me everything."

Trixie hesitated, she didn't want to share her tale. It was the last thing that still belonged to her.

But this could her last chance to tell a tale, at all. One last story, one last audience. Trixie cleared he throat, took a deep breath and started.

The symphony of a life.

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Once upon a time, in the magical land of Equestria, there was a mare who always brought hope to the ponies around her. She traveled far and wide, from town to town, one show at a time, in an eternal crusade to give ponies something to look up at. A long time since she started, now her name was chanted and cheered wherever she went.

"Hope! Hope! Hope!"

Living up to her name, Hope Lulamoon was a beacon that could easily raise the spirit of anypony near to her. Born in Hoofington, forged in Canterlot and loved everywhere. Once called 'Great and Powerful', some ponies talked about her as the most magical unicorn in Equestria and the braver ones even suggested her as a modern day Starswirl. She was rich in every possible way, except for one; Love.

Despite being loved by everyone, Hope never found 'that especial one' who could win her hearth. Stallions and mares did their best, some of them even managed to win her favor in bed. But at the end of the day, not a single one was enough to be called her lover. That seemed to be the case till one eventful day, when Hope arrived in her native Canterlot to celebrate the Summer Sun Celebration.

After the show, Hope went to sleep. If rumors are true, in the way between the Royal Gardens where she performed and the hotel where she was sleeping, she met a pony. No one ever managed to find out who was the mysterious stallion, but after that night, Hope declared she had known the meaning of true love. Every year, on the same date, she would take a break from her travels and stop by Canterlot for a month before retaking them.

Until one year, when she left the city just one day after arriving. Nopony knew why, but since then, she refused to put a hoof in the equestrian capital. Some months later and she also disappeared from the face of Equestria.

:||

***

Once upon a time, in the magical land of Equestria, there was filly. No one knew who were her parents, only that one magical night, right after the Summer Sun Celebration, a basket was left at the doors of Our Mother Faust Orphanage, in Hoofington. Pined to the basket was a paper. Just three single words and a signature.

"My greatest trick. - H.P. Lulamoon." Inside was a filly wrapped in a purple cloth with yellow stars and moons.

The filly, accordingly named Trixie, grew up among the orphans but she never managed to get along with them. Sometimes she would hang out with some of them, a little chat here and some games there, but most of her spare time she was alone. The solitude wasn't because a lack of social skills, on the contrary, she was actually kind and likable, always on friendly terms with the rest of her companions. Somehow, she always felt she didn't belong.

Always being apart from the others, gave Lil Trix a lot of time to think. When she was seven, she had already devoured the orphanage's limited library and was periodically visiting the public one. Her curiosity always driving her, she already was on a first name basis with all the staff there.

By the age of twelve, she was one of the oldest orphans yet to be adopted. For some reason or another, the multiple couples that went to the orphanage always found another pony they wanted. Lil Trix couldn't help to think she would never have a loving family. Trying to cope with that feeling, she decided to stand by herself, outpacing the need of somepony else.

That decision drove her into applying for Celestia's School for Gifted Unicorns. She studied for months, a very strict routine that began at six a.m. with the sunrise and ended as long as she could stay awake. Until that point, she never was a perfect student, always relying on improvisation and a good spare of luck. But that ended that year, when she gave everything to enter the most prestigious school in Equestria, to prove herself, to prove the world, that she could be the very best. Behind her was Hoofington, Canterlot waiting for her.

:||

***

Once upon a time, in the magical land of Equestria, there was a school. It was meant to guide the new generations into becoming something for their own. Some ponies called it 'The greatest beacon of Equestrian enlightenment'. All the fillies and colts there felt privileged and grateful of being there. All except for one. One single pony, who never felt welcomed or privileged in any way inside there. Beatrice Lulamoon, just a regular student.

Although she was fairly talented and hardworking as everyone else, she had something that kept her from being like her companions; she was different. Every pony in the School was the last one in a line of successful and well known families, sons and daughters of Equestria's nobility who were enrolled since their date of birth. All of them except for Beatrice. She simply appeared one day, knocking at the door and asking for the entrance exam.

At first, she was the happiest pony in the world when she got admitted. Then, Beatrice almost fainted when she also discovered that, because of her condition, the School would provide her a room and food during her stay there. And her heart almost stopped right then and there when she looked at herself at the mirror and found a cutie mark in her flank. A magic wand, reassuring her that she took the right decision by coming to the magic school.

She spent her first year working as hard as she could to make that opportunity worth. One year later and she was regretting even having set a hoof in there. Her teachers and her companions, never really accepting her, always reminded how different she was.

Disenchanted with how her new life turned out, only her pride prevented her from leaving. Her spirit suffered under the tests of a place where her equals mocked her and her superiors ignored her. But, even at having her little world against her, the filly never broke. Beatrice never gave up on her dreams and hopes, promising to become a better pony from the experience.

She lasted the six years it took before her graduation. Then, in an eventful day of winter, she packed her limited belongings and parted into the night to see the world by herself.

:||

***

Once upon a time, in the magical land of Equestria, there was a pony decided to watch the entire world. She called herself Trixie, and she had traveled far and wide around all corners of the map. Few were the places she didn't know about, a true daughter of the road.

At first she started just like any other traveler, going wherever her hooves drove her, doing odd jobs and sleeping wherever the night caught her. Life wasn't easy, sometimes the unforgiving sun of the dessert or the endless ice of the mountains would do their worst against her. But her fierce will would never surrender. Trixie spent most of her youth wandering without a real place to go, just enjoying the world. No boundaries were holding her to anywhere nor anypony. She was only responsible for herself. Freedom in all its forms.

Trixie would have ended her days just like that if it wasn't for that special day, when her past finally caught up to her.

Somewhere near to Neigh Orleans, Trixie met a circle of ponies who knew her mother. It didn't take too much from them to recognize her. According to the older ponies, she had her mother's mane and eyes, they also claimed her stance could only belong to a Lulamoon. That day, Trixie finally found something she didn't even knew she was looking for, a family.

They took the responsibility of teaching her. Illusions, theatrics, pyromancy, acrobatics, sleight of hoof... a whole new gamma that she embraced as her own. But that wasn't what she treasured the most. It was the feeling of finally belonging somewhere what gave Trixie countless moments of happiness while she stayed in Neigh Orleans. When it wasn't the new things she was learning, it was the stories about her mother they had for her, or simply staying inside a bar among friends during a rainy day.

A year passed and Trixie was a changed mare. Leaving behind her old self, she had a new sense in life; live up to the Lulamoon name. Her mentors, deciding that she was ready to face the world alone, told her to return to the roads. By her twentieth birthday they gave Trixie a place to call home and a uniform to bear her mother's legacy. She faced the world again.

:||

***

Once upon a time, in the magical land of Equestria, there was pony called Trixie Lulamoon. Her call in life was to do one single thing; dazzle everyone around her.

There was nothing else on this world or another that she enjoyed more than putting on a show for others. All the emotions of it fascinated her, the fear before facing an audience and the trill of success. She had a very well prepared spectrum of wonders for them. Stories to raise and shake a pony's hearth, traps that nopony else but her could escape, fireworks so complex that painted true masterpieces in the sky and a far lot of more.

Just like her mother before her, Trixie Lulamoon's name was chanted and cheered wherever she went. The entire existence was her scenario and she was its star. Life was good. In fact, if you asked her, the Great and Powerful Trixie had a perfect life.

So it was less understandable how her attitude became so aggressive towards the world. How willpower became sloth. How self-improvement gave way to arrogance. Maybe it was how she was raised, always an outsider. Maybe it was the lack of an actual family till adulthood.

Maybe she had been so long at the bottom that now she didn't know what to do on top.

Maybe…

Yeah, this is not a story of endless success. If it was, there wouldn't be an actual story to tell, wouldn't it? And stop pretending you don't know what will happen now, we all know! Every f*cking body knows it!

Ponyville, the confrontation, that pair of morons, that friggin' Ursa. All culminating in the loss of a home and the life attached to it.

Let-- let's just get over that part.

:||

***

Once upon a time, in the magical land of Equestria. It’s over. Trixie's life is done. Her trip has finally reached its end. Final destination: The bottom.

Trixie Lulamoon, Successful magician extraordinaire. She had money, fame and a purpose in life. A good set of accomplishments for a pony who just reached her twenties. A legacy a mare could be proud of...

Gone. One mistake, one bad placed act and one tale going horribly wrong.

At first it was the money. The years in the road had made her very careful on how to keep her savings. Not risking having it all in one single place, Trixie had an account with a fair share of money in case of emergencies. The papers needed to access it were provably destroyed under the debris of her old home. By when she finally managed to probe that those bits were in fact her bits, taxes, insurances and fees reduced the savings of years into something that would barely last a couple of months. And not even that.

The, the fame. Trixie always enjoyed being in the spotlight, it gave her the comfort of knowing that her life had a meaning. But not anymore. Now, being the center of attention had become a nightmare. The brightest stars are the ones that consume the faster, or so say the belief, and Trixie witnessed how the cheers became boos, how a whole life of actually working hard and doing things right was now completely eclipsed by her mistakes.

Finally her purpose, her call in life, the one thing she wanted to do with her life, her destiny. Shattered.

She tried once, twice, trice, over and over again. First she tried getting back to the theaters in Manehatten, starting with the Mask of Vendetta, where she got her first performance. But no one wanted the bad publicity that her name carried. Then it was the streets turn. She started there and she was now back to her roots. Everywhere, from Trottingham to Fillydelphia, she met the coldness of indifference. Her old acts, the new ones, the classic and the one she herself created, all ignored. Nopony was willing to give her even a second glance, much less a chance.

:||

***

Trixie discovered what the real meaning of hell was.

An endless dessert without anything else? No. A place of coldness and an eternal storm? Nope. The bottomless abyss of myths? Not even close. Fire and brimstone? She wished it was that simple. Banished away in solitude? Trapped in stone? Reduced to a shadow? Hell is nothing like that!

Hell is surviving without living. Hell is to have every mention towards your name to be a curse or a mockery. Hell is to wake up every morning, knowing it's not going to get any better until going back to sleep again. Hell is waking up every Celestia damn day and not even knowing why you're here.

Hell is the complete and full knowledge that, despite how much you try to deny it, how much you try to reason it, how much it angers and scares you to admit.

It's all my fault.

||

Once again, from the top.

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"Wait wait wait, so that's it?!" The mare across the tables interrupts Trixie's tale. "You lost everything and now you take whatever job you can?"

Trixie sighs, looking at her drink as if it held all the answers she doesn't know. "Yes, that's pretty much all of it."

"Come on girl, you can't surrender like that!" Someone says from another table. Trixie looks at around her, realizing that pretty much all of the cafe listened to her tale.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IJ11PLiJJSg

Author's micro-note: Don't you dare to read the rest without listening to this, I really mean it.

"I--" Trixie doesn't know how to react. She knew that guy, he's a night guard at the Museum. When he's down on his mod Trixie usually gives him part of her fries to cheer him up.

"Larry's right Trix, you have through so much, you can't quit now." That was Lightning Dust, Trixie knew her too. Lightning had committed her fair amount of mistakes too, and Trixie always tried to support her.

"You guys, care?"

"If we care, she asks. Yes we do, lady." Mister Bundy, the guy from the shoe store who liked to complain about his own life in the cafe. He always had a good listener in Trixie.

"You know Lulamoon, my father had this saying. When you hit bottom, the only place left to go is up." Berry Punch joins too from behind the bar. Trixie can't believe it. All the regulars of the cafe were actually supporting her, telling her to not surrender. Believing in her.

The rest of the hour, the regulars spent their time encouraging Trixie. Telling her that life could be better. Each one of them took their time to say something to pick her up. By the time they needed to go back to their homes and works, Trixie knew that there were ponies who cared for her.

And all it took was one last story, one final tale.

It was six o'clock when Trixie finally left the place. The rain has stopped and the grass was soft under her hooves. She glanced at the Canterlot Mountain, the first rays of sunlight appearing over the horizon. For the first time on weeks, Trixie interrupted her quick walk from the cafe to her department. For some reason or another, the feelings around her felt better than ever. The smell of flowers opening with the new morning, the sounds of birds awakening, the soft warming touch of the sun over her fur.

It was a new day, as good as any other in the calendar. But for Trixie, it was the first day of something new. Nothing really changed, she was still stuck in the same job, with the same options life gave and took from her. Today however, she knew something that she didn't know before, that she had an option. She couldn't choice on what was going to happen next. But she could always choice on what to do about it.

She wasn't sure if that was good or bad, but it was definitely different, and she liked that.

"Life is a choice and I choice to live."