Unicorns

by Strythio

First published

Sweetie Bell returns from school one day with an interesting statement regarding unicorns and their family life. Rarity is less than amused, and becomess determined to debunk the ludicrious assumption that unicorns commit acts of incest regularly.

Rarity has a dress shop, and for the longest time, she dreams of making it big in the fashion industry. However, Sweetie Bell living with Rarity on a more permanent basis has forced the unicorn to accept that she is learning just as much about the fashion world as she is about rearing fillies.

So when her little sister comes home one day and asks a most disturbing question regarding their unicorn parents, Rarity is intent on busting what she believes is a myth that has so long lingered regarding unicorns. After all, there was no need for everyone in Ponyville to think that unicorns commonly commit acts of incest when such was not true.

Right?

Incest, a unicorn thing?

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Stitches, more stitches! Rarity was hard at work on her latest masterpiece; a blue dress. But this was no ordinary bland dress, no far from it. This dress needed to not just be very fluid and loose, and it also needed to be incredibly durable. Her client apparently had no intentions on wearing such a monotone dress anywhere but to work, but Rarity was not going to strike her client for her tastes. Indeed, a flowing design had already begun to shake, the sleeves lacking frill, but seamlessly transitioning into the bulk.

What the customer wants, they get, with a little extra added in. Just as Rarity finished sewing up the dark blue dress and held it up for inspection, the bell over her front door rang. Since there had been no appointments scheduled for today, it could only be a filly coming home from school.

Rarity was not one to go greet her sister, but she could hear the hoofsteps swiftly approaching. Her sister's stubby legs almost always brought amusement when she thought about her many steps just to equal the distance from the door to her sewing station. This was not a day for play though, and while Rarity pretended not to notice her sister, the distinct dropping of saddlebags and what could only be characterized as eager bouncing (either that or Sweetie Belle had very suddenly grown a few feet taller). She was approaching, and despite Rarity's business-oriented self seeking to continue inspecting the dress, her sibling-oriented half seized the opportunity created by indecision.

"Hello Sweetie Belle, how was school today?"

"Great!" Sweetie Belle's excitement was hardly contained in her tiny little body, her green eyes practically sending waves of electricity through Rarity. Either that, or Rarity was actually eager to hear about what was so great at school.

"And what exactly made your day so great today?"

"Ms. Cheerilee was doing history, and when she mentioned Canterlot, she also mentioned unicorn families. Rarity, are our parents siblings?"

The blue dress hit the workstation as if a cloth magnet had attracted it. Rarity turned fully to her sister, who's wide smile was instead replaced by a curious expression. This was not some attention grabbing joke, it seemed her sister was quite serious. "Sweetie Belle, of course not! Wherever did you get such a ludicrous idea-"

"Ms. Cheerilee said that a general stereotype for unicorns is that they often breed within their own family," Sweetie explained, "She said that Canterlot is living 'proof' of it."

"Were those her exact words?" Rarity knew that foals could be very terrible gossipers, mostly because they had a hard time recalling what was originally said in the first place. Hell, full grown mares tended to omit details when they passed information along, and they were supposed to have better retention. Then again, foal gossip tended to be more fun because of the very early spins the tellers put on it.

"Yup." Sweetie brightened up again, her wide eyes and grin returning. It was as if they were, combined, a black hole threatening to suck any individuals unwilling to turn away into the abyss known as Sweetie Belle. It was an enchantment that Rarity had once believed to be her sister truly practicing some sort of manipulative magic. But regardless, Sweetie insisted on getting her answer. "But is that part true?"

"Absolutely not!" Rarity was outraged at the idea that Sweetie seemed to not realize this. It was just a stereotype, akin to pegasi all being orphans and earth ponies being as bright as the rocks they dig up in the mines. Well, now that Rarity thought about it, the last one might have been a joke about crystal ponies that somehow survived their disappearance thanks to Sombra's curse, but all the same, none of those statements were universally true. They were mere jokes at best, racial jabs from the days of early Equestria lingering in the minds of modern ponies at worse.

"Are you sure? If I were a colt would you mess with me like that?"

Rarity was not sure if she wanted to dignify that question with a response. But if she left it unanswered, there was no telling what blanks Sweetie would fill in. "Of course not! You realize the many problems caused by incest? Do you not know any better?"

Her last question should have been clearly seen as rhetorical, but Sweetie seriously seemed to scrunch up her face in thought over it. "Well, according to Cheerilee, Canterlot is living proof of it. And I think Cheerilee would know."

The mare had probably not even been to Canterlot outside of field trips. Rarity attempted to calm herself. This kind of racial stereotyping was still surviving it seemed, despite the fact that it had been nearly a thousand plus years since the three pony races had come together. Then again, if they were surviving still, they were as jokes, not as facts. And Cheerilee had apparently made the difference unclear in class.

"I think I need to have a word with Ms. Cheerilee." Rarity did not intend on chewing her out, but she needed to confirm whether Sweetie was reporting this accurately or not. While it sounds like something that might accompany a history course, subliminal messaging was always a present threat in the system. Of course, Rarity looked back to the dress that she had been working on.

No matter how twisted the local school system was, she could not just allow her work to go unfinished before taking care of this business. "After a few more stitches..."



Since Rarity knew as much about where Cheerilee lived as the next pony, the first place she went was to the schoolhouse, a hour or two after Sweetie had dropped the shell regarding what she had learned today in class. Perhaps out of dumb luck, or the fact that the sun was beginning to set, Cheerilee just so happened to be at the front door, checking it. Either she was locking up for the day or she was trying to make sure that the door was still locked. Burglary in Ponyville was very uncommon, but sometimes it never hurt to check, especially after a grading period was closing. It was only a year ago that a certain filly had been found hiring ponies to steal her schoolwork, alter the grade, and then replace it as if nothing had been tampered with.

"Ms. Cheerilee!" Rarity both greeted and waved, catching the mare's attention almost immediately.

"Oh hi Rarity!" Cheerilee smiled and waved back, and after a gentle tug on the door, walked down the path to meet Rarity halfway. "What brings you by?"

"Sweetie Belle came home from school today and asked whether our parents are siblings or not." Rarity did not beat around the bush, for although she had put some of the finishing touches on the dress, an artist's work was never done until the product left the workshop.

"Oh really?" Cheerilee seemed surprised by this, "I figured that the answer would be something she already knows."

Rarity was not sure if she should be offended or only more inquisitive. After all, assuming that foals knew anything about anything could be a very dangerous thought process. Still, Rarity chose to be the latter, as the former would only draw out the less than noble part of her. "And why would she be asking such a question in the first place?"

"Today we went over the pre-Great War era," Cheerilee explained, "One of the highlights was on some of the stereotypes that developed during that time period that persist to this day, such as the one about unicorns being avid believers in incest to preserve nobility."

"Go on." Rarity wanted to hear more about this lesson from the mare's mouth, particularly if she was going to explain to Sweetie where she had went wrong in her assumptions. To her knowledge, these kinds of statements went back much further than the pre-Great War, so the question now was whether Sweetie Belle had had gone wrong in what she took from the lesson or if Cheerilee had been wrong in how she presented it.

"Unicorns are notorious for being very family conscious in ways almost polar opposite to pegasi. If no suitable lines were found, then they tended to just breed within the family on a second cousin basis."

"That is hardly sibling-tier incest." It seems that Sweetie had extrapolated just a tad. Rarity should have known better than to jump to conclusions. "And how is Canterlot living proof?"

"Well, Canterlot does not have a significant amount of immigration according to the recent census, and yet, its population stays rather steady if not slowly creeping upward," Cheerilee explained with a sly smile, "A possible explanation is that either the unicorns in Canterlot do not accurately report immigrants from other parts of Equestria, or they simply mate with each other, which after nearly eight hundred years would result in almost guaranteed incest with whomever they chose as a mate, presuming that mate were also native to the city." And so Cheerilee laughed, as if this completely explained away why she used Canterlot, one of the few unicorn dominated cities to ever exist in Equestria, as a prime example of incest among unicorns.

"I do not think that is how pony genetics work." Rarity laughed along, all the while trying to make her point. "Why, the most recent royal wedding had not a drop of incest in it." Unless you counted Twilight's over-protectiveness of her brother, but that was completely platonic, and had more to do with "Cadence's" presumed attitude during the pre-wedding process. Which, by all account, was not exactly unusual for Canterlot elite, and Twilight should have expected at least that much during the stress of the preparations. Of course, it did turn out that "Cadence" was in fact Queen Chrysalis, but even still, Twilight's concerns were not present because she was jealous or anything. In hindsight, everything made perfect sense.

"Well, to be fair Rarity, Shining Armor did take Princess Cadence as his wife, and she is hardly a native to Canterlot let the newspapers tell it. As I said in class, it is just a stereotype." Cheerilee continued to laugh, even as Rarity stopped laughing.

"So, why are you even planting these ideas into your students' little heads?" Rarity inquired, "If they are untrue and rather slanderous almost to the point of a criminal offense."

"It is just a joke Rarity." Cheerilee by now had stopped laughing, and seemed to be catching on that the reason for Rarity's visit had been less about catching up and more about critiquing her teaching methods. "Such jokes help history sections pass by just a little quicker."

"A joke that clearly is being believed." Or at least, being believed by Sweetie Belle. She was not the brightest horn in the school, but if she actually had some doubts regarding her own family tree, there was no telling what the other foals, who have probably only seen ten unicorns together in one spot at any one time in their entire lifetimes, were thinking. With that in mind, they could all be going home professing to their guardians about the incest of unicorns. Applejack might reprimand Applebloom, but then again, she just might not, especially if she were to secretly believe it herself.

"If Sweetie Belle is taking it for more than it is, then the fault is less with the lesson and more with the proper teachers of unicorn heritage." Cheerilee seemed to take an edge in her tone here, as if she was the one offended by this conversation. " I have as of now not had any other complaints regarding this lesson."

"How many unicorns are there in the class?" Rarity challenged, "I do not intend to put this down to race, but only a unicorn-"

"Would complain about the racial stereotyping of unicorns?" Cheerilee frowned. "Rarity, that is nonsense. You have friends from all three races, and I am sure you know that they would neither stand for nor promote such thing."

"Then why are you?" By Rarity's logic, from what Cheerilee just professed about the lesson, she was encouraging the idea that unicorns commonly practice incest. She had also used Canterlot as an example, where it just so happened, by coincidence, to be very likely to be true. Okay, maybe it was outright true, but unicorns outside of Canterlot had neither rhyme nor reason to even consider such a thing.

Cheerilee brought a hoof to her head. There seemed to be a disconnect somewhere in this conversation; one of them was not comprehending the other properly. "Rarity, it is just a joke, meant to ease the students into the first Great War section of our textbook. I see no pegasi complaining about broken families nor earth ponies coming forth about their intelligence being related to the food they grow."

Cheerilee made a point there. Maybe Rarity was over-reacting just a little here. Applejack surely would have barged straight to the schoolhouse if she thought that Cheerilee was insinuating that earth ponies were all rather dim-witted. Rarity should have went to her first, since she too had a family member who was attending the school here.

"I will have to beg for your pardon Cheerilee, I fear I may have overreacted." Rarity tried to chuckle a bit to ease the tension. "Sweetie probably just took the wrong things from your lesson."

"No worries Rarity, but I think you might need to educate Sweetie on the nuances of unicorn history." Cheerilee began walking past Rarity at this point, clearly eager to now be on her way. It seemed that she had held back a more biting remark out of professionalism. "She is coming of age you know."

While that was true, Rarity did not exactly have time for lessons with her sister. To be frank, she hardly had time for her own luxuries, let alone properly teaching Sweetie Belle about the pegasi and the griffons.

Strange really, how did that expression come about? Now that Rarity thought about it, when had she received a talk on those matters? It had been years no doubt, but surely she knew far more about the practical uses of the saying than where the saying may have actually came from.

Rarity waved Cheerilee off, and assumed from the lack of a return wave that she had probably irritated the instructor more than she had let on. Professionalism, Rarity had to admit, had been lacking somewhat on her part there near the end. But now that she knew the problem, or had some idea of it, then how was she going to fix it?

Lightbulb, and Rarity had an idea that just might work. Especially considering the context of the situation. She would just get Twilight, a native to Canterlot, to explain the whole ordeal to Sweetie Belle. She spent much of her time at the library, so all she needed to do really was to drop Sweetie off for a day or two, and Twilight could sort all of this out.

Rarity smiled to herself and began trotting towards the library. Yes, once this matter was out of her mane, she could carry on with her work without having to worry about Sweetie Belle being misinformed. Granted, the time she was taking now out to find Sweetie a teacher could have very well been spent teaching her, but Rarity's mind was already made up. She was on her way to Twilight's house to get her to properly educated Sweetie Belle about unicorn relationships.



The town library also served as the home of the town's resident alicorn princess. What a weird concept that was when it was a new thing. Hardly anypony treated the place any differently, there was no extra security, and for the most part, Twilight kept a relatively low profile. The weirdest part was that, in truth, a very important pony was living in the town library. And she actually seemed to thrive no less among the shelves and shelves of books.

Not surprisingly, when Rarity knocked on the front door Spike answered, and did his usual bit of love-struck staring before asking, "Hey Rarity, what brings you by?"

"Is Twilight home? We need to have a quick chat."

Spike swung open the door, and lead the way into the library. "You're just in time, Sweetie Belle just stopped by about ten minutes ago."

Really? If Sweetie was going to go to Twilight directly, Rarity could have just went back to her dress and forgotten about the whole thing. But that was not important: what was important was that Sweetie be taught the proper familial relations between unicorns.

At the far end of the library, near a shelf stacked as high as it many counterparts, Twilight had a chalkboard, some chalk, and a very attentive filly at her command. The floor was cleared and clean, likely through the diligent efforts of Spike, and one could hardly tell that the library went through a messy period on a monthly if not weekly basis. It seemed that just as Rarity was approaching the miniature classroom, Twilight had been in the middle of her lesson.

"And so, while incest can lead to rather terrible birth defects, morally, there is nothing wrong with the act itself."

Rarity's ears might would have left her head had they not been attached. Did she just hear Twilight state that there was nothing morally wrong with incest? Had her faith been placed in the boiling kettle? Did the gossip of Twilight loving her brother romantically have a drop of truth in it? Say it was not so! "Twilight darling, what are you teaching?"

Sweetie turned in her chair to see Rarity, a wide smile on her face. And of course that enchanted look again. "Hi Rarity! After you left I came here to learn more about unicorn incest. Did you know that it is actually pretty acceptable-"

"Sweetie, I said that it was neither encouraged nor taboo," Twilight clarified, "I never stated that it was 'pretty' acceptable."

Rarity laughed to herself, imagining that this is how Cheerilee might would have reacted. Granted, saying that it was "morally" accepted was actually not that great of a leap from saying that it was "pretty" acceptable. However, having learned before about jumping to conclusions, Rarity decided that she would hear out the remainder of the message before making any sort of judgement. "Well Twilight, I had just come by to ask you to help me with this very thing. Please, continue."

Sweetie turned and Twilight resumed levitation of the piece of chalk. Now that Rarity looked at it, it looked like a very complicated, and quite intertwined, family tree was on the board. The names were written too small to actually read from a distance, but Rarity assumed that it was a look at Twilight's family tree. Either that or a family tree of Canterlot, which would probably not look very differently truth be told.

"Incest is said to have originated in the pegacorns back before the advent of the alicorn. Since a pegacorn with any of the three races resulted in one of the three races and not another pegacorn, the only way for pegacorns to get more pegacorns at birth was to mate with other pegacorns. So many of them were killed off during the early days of the Ponin Empire that technically only direct descendents of Celestia or Luna have any chance of birthing a pegacorn, and even then, the odds are incredibly slim. Unicorns tried for a few generations, but only worsened the issue because they constantly diluted the blood with more unicorn blood."

Rarity found herself seated next to Sweetie Belle, oddly paying some attention to this lesson. The idea of a difference between pegacorn and alicorn intrigued her.

"So if you mated with a future nephew, would that make a pegacorn?" Sweetie inquired, "Since your brother married an alicorn?"

"Alicorns are made, not born," Twilight corrected, "They are not really the same as pegacorns, but no, that would not work either. I would have to mate with another alicorn in order to get a pegacorn."

"So if you had the opportunity, would you mate with your alicorn brother in order to spawn a pegacorn?" Rarity's attention nagged at her to return to her shop, but she needed to see just what Sweetie would be getting out of these lessons. And of course she just had to know whether Twilight would romp her brother if she got the chance.

Twilight blushed very briefly before laughing. "Of course not, he's my brother whether he's an alicorn or not."

That brief, but oh so present pause was just a second too much for Rarity, and apparently, it was also too much for Sweetie. "But incest is not taboo in unicorn society, and you both would have started out as unicorns," Sweetie challenged, "I mean, it is not like another stallion has a remote shot of becoming a princess anytime soon, and just imagine all the pegacorns you two could have!"

"But then they would have to mate with their children in order to create more pegacorns," Rarity reminded Sweetie, "Or their children would have to mate with their cousins, but they would only get cousins if Celestia and Luna got involved, in which case they might as well just alicornize any pony they want in order to get more pegacorns-"

"Okay, moving on." Twilight tapped at the chalkboard with quite the force, bits of chalk breaking off from impact. "Alicorns and pegacorns are not the same thing, and the mystery of which came first is hotly debated."

"I am pretty sure pegacorns came first," Rarity offered, "They sound like just a combination between pegasi and unicorn with just the right touch to show both traits."

"I think alicorns came first, and their children were pegacorns," Sweetie countered, "If pegacorns could be made like that, then wouldn't there be a pegacorn or two out there by now that is not an alicorn?"

"If you two want to debate whether pegacorns or alicorns came first, be my guest, but the focus is on unicorn incest, acceptance of which derived from the need for pegacorns to interbreed in order to procreate one another." Twilight attempted to return the discussion back to the main topic, but the main question had already been answered, somewhat. Once derailed by the conductor, the train of commentary that followed would all boil down to the matter of debate on which had come first: pegacorns or alicorns.

"Maybe the right combination has not been found yet." Rarity could feel herself slipping further and further into this debate, and closer and closer to the dress being finished whether she liked it or not. "Do you have any idea how complicated pony genetics are?"

"So Cheerilee was right!" Sweetie jumped from her chair, as if her discovery was about to change the world for the better. " Unicorns do accept incest!"

"Cheerilee brought up a stereotype that unicorns frequently practice it, not that they accept it or not accept it!" Rarity was now on her hooves in a flurry, "Sweetie Belle, can you make up your mind which it is that you heard?"

Because technically, if Twilight was to be believed, unicorns in Canterlot truly did accept incest. And thus, Cheerilee would have been largely correct in what she was saying, even if her intention had been to pass it off as a joke and not a universal truth. Using Canterlot as an example would have been justified, and Rarity would look even more the fool in not knowing that, despite the fact that she has gone to Canterlot, the fact that she herself was a grown unicorn, and that had interacted with the elite of unicorn society.

Wait, wait a minute. Was Rarity really getting herself worked up over this? If Cheerilee was right and she already had apologized for her behavior, then all she needed to do was set Sweetie Belle straight. Upon this realization, Rarity seemed to have either missed or ignored Sweetie's response to her previous question and instead jumped straight to another question. "Twilight, are your parents remotely related to each other?"

Twilight's face scrunched up for a moment, the question likely taking her just as off guard as it had taken Rarity. The reason was likely different, since the discussion already was incest among unicorns, but the direction was the same. After reviewing the tree that she had drawn up on the chalkboard, Twilight would look back to Rarity with a quizically expression.

"No. Come to think of it, they are not even related by fifth cousin tier. My father's side seems to run well with Canterlot norms, but my mother's side is kind of out there in comparison."

"Maybe one of them immigrated to Canterlot?" Sweetie suggested eagerly, as if this explained some deep-seated truth. "Your father might be a Canterlot native, and your mother might have come from somplace else."

"That hardly fits with continuity," Twilight pondered aloud, tapping her chin with a hoof, "On record, neither of them have ever lived anywhere but Canterlot."

"What if there are two main family lines in Canterlot?" Rarity suggested, "It would certainly explain how there can be a blood nephew many times removed to the princesses when neither sister claim him as their own."

"Well, a unicorn outside of Canterlot would need someone on the inside to get relations," Spike pointed out, "Pretending that they have lived there all along and happen to be a relative would be an easy way to do it. How would they prove you wrong?"

"If that were true, then technically the idea of unicorn incest would be a complete and utter myth," Twilight mused, "And that it's acceptance came about as the acceptance of adopting into your family in order to get more unicorns living in Canterlot and not outside."

"Back to the original question, do Canterlot unicorn accept true incest?" Rarity had had about enough of the new findings, and simply wanted an answer at this point. "It is not really incest at all if the ponies are not actually related by blood, and are only written as such."

"I guess not." Twilight seemed to accept this conclusion before clearing the chalkboard. "I guess that throws that out the window."

"But hold on, how would unicorns get away with fudging the family trees that much?" Sweetie stood up and walked up to Twilight, insisting that her inquiry be answered with that gaze of hers. "Wouldn't Celestia stop them?"

"Well Sweetie, I doubt the Princess really has time to keep up with all of that." Rarity would use her magic to pull Sweetie away, guiding her towards the door. "We should be going. We can discuss this more on our way home."

Sweetie attempted to protest, but there would be no protesting to be had. Rarity was glad that that had gotten settled and that, in fact, Cheerilee was indeed spouting a joke that was misinterpreted as fact, and her example regarding Canterlot was false only out of ignorance. She would have to let Sweetie Belle point that out in class, if she so had the nerve.




As the door closed behind her guests, Twilight let out a sigh. It was not of relife, but of exasperation. Why would unicorns in Canterlot rather put on the impression that they were commiting incest when they were instead just consolidating the unicorn race in Canterlot? Surely that would be less scandalous.

Then again, focusing all of one race into the capital of the country might would prove scandalous if it were to cause problems. After all, other than perhaps a few exceptions such as the royal guard, unicorns practically made up Canterlot. Surrounded, daily, by unicorns, Celestia's decisions over the years might very well reflect the will of unicorns more than the remainder of the country, hence her need to at times get away in order to find out what the ponies want.

Or, unicorns elaborately crafted this scheme so that it would be next to impossible to discern true incest from record incest.

"Twilight, something wrong?" Spike's voice cut through the mental fog like a beam of lights, hardly holding Twilight's attention for long. What had her parents taught her about incest? Hardly anything really. It was not something commonly spoken about in their household, and not even Cadence brought it up in her various discussions regarding the pegasi and the griffons. Considering that Sweetie seemed to be staying with Rarity on a more permanent basis, it was no wonder that the filly was so inquisitive.

Not like she had an older brother to mess with, just for the sake of understanding some things. Twilight cringed, and shook her head clear. Maybe it was better that she didn't.

Spike may have called to her again that day, many times actually, but his voice again did not cut through the fog that was her mind. For the remainder of the afternoon she would ponder on this matter. And for the remainder of the afternoon, she would reflect on the need for a foalsitter when she had two parents and an older brother to watch after her. Her mind would wander through all of the books she had looked up on mating, and how she attempted to demonstrate her knowledge to her amused foalsitter.

Most importantly, her mind wandered into whether or not Cadence and Shining Armor ever had such dilemmas. By the setting of the sun, few answers had come, but many melancholic flashbacks had.

So that night, Twilight decided to pen a letter to Cadence and Shining Armor. Both were older, and may soon have a foal of their own. It seemed worth popping the question now rather than later:

"Is true incest accepted by unicorn society as a whole?"

It is the law; for now anyways

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The Crystal Palace, the home of crystalline luxury and love. The crystal guards were diligent, but all in all, things were very peaceful in the Empire. Almost too peaceful for Shining Armor. As Captain of the Royal Guard, he could only spend so much time in the Empire, and as much as he hated to admit it, he really missed his old job of patrolling the ramparts of Celestia's castle whenever he was in the Empire with little to actually do. At least the daily shenanigans of the Canterlot residents could entertain him on slow days.

Here, the only entertainment he could get was from Cadence, and that was if, and only if, she was not occupied with royal duties. Like smiling, waving, and reassuring their crystal subjects that the dungeons would not be filled to the brim for the slightest offense against them. The guards were hardly even necessary, nothing more than a visual deterrent to be frank. It was lonely at the top of the defensive pecking order when there were no tangible threats to the Empire, because if your job was to defend something that was never attacked, then how would you ever actually get to do your job? At least he was not permanently stationed here like most of the guards here.

So Shining sighed heavily on the balcony. The ponies went about their business, gazing up every now and again at one of their two rulers. It was near the end of the boring day, with the sun dipping ever lower to the horizon, that at last a highlight to his day seemed within grasp with a shout from within the castle catching his attention. It sounded like Cadence.

"Hey Shining, we just received a letter from Twilight! Are you coming?"

Hearing that Twilight had sent the duo a letter brought him into an excited frenzy. Even if it was nothing more than Twilight wanting to speak Starswirl, Shining would take that over overwatching the uneventful city for a few minutes. Not to mention taking time out to read a non-urgent leader of Twilight's meant that Cadence was not occupied any longer.

Hardly ever did Shining find himself crossing a floor so fast. He trotted so hastily to the throne room, the guards may have gotten whiplash from his mere passing. Just short of skidding, the stallion slowed as he came within sight of the throne room, not wanting to betray how eager he was to be effectively off duty for the night. It was not that Cadence would not understand, it was just a habitual courtesy that he had yet to break from their days back in Canterlot.

Upon spotting him, Cadence began reading the unfurled letter initially with earnest.

"Dear Princess Cadence and BBBFF,

Recently Rarity came over with Sweetie Belle, and we had the strangest conversation. Long story short, is true incest accepted by unicorn society as a whole? I thought I might ask you two since that question is no doubt going to come up when you two finally have a foal of your own."

Cadence's face went from overly excited to completely baffled. And not the kind of baffled that a stumped questionnaire answerer might have on their face when encountering a difficult inquiry. No, it was the expression of the kind of baffled that a reader would have while reading a joke that was intended to be funny, but the humor was completely and utterly lost upon the reader no matter how many times they went back to re-read.

Shining had a similar expression written on his face. Why did Twilight write to them about that particular question? Wouldn't it have been easier to just consult her books, or ask Princess Celestia? Or couldn't she have just penned a letter to their parents? Did she just now have to acquire a curiosity about the seedier things in life?

"I do not understand, this is something that Twilight should be able to answer perfectly by now." Cadence rolled up the message, her frown deepening the more she thought about the question. "She has lived in Canterlot almost her entire life. She hasn't already forgotten such a thing has she?"

"Well Cadence, it's not like Twilight socialized much when she was a filly," Shining pointed out, "And it's not like she's some loose mare who gives out easy-"

"What does that have to do with teaching her the essentials?" Cadence now shifted her gaze towards Shining almost accusingly, as if it were his responsibility. "Of course incest is acceptable, not just for unicorns, but all ponies. This should hardly even be a question that a grown mare should be asking, much less a student of the chief legislator in the land."

"What?" Shining trotted up to Cadence's side, intrigue written on his face. "Since when? My parents were pretty clear that incest was wrong."

"There are always exceptions." Cadence looked to Shining quizzically, as if trying to wrap her head around his response. "Even still, it is not like your parents had to tell you not to fool with your sister. Did they?"

"Of course not!" Shining stuck out his tongue in a 'bleh' motion, causing Cadence to giggle. "Twilight is my sister, younger at that. It is just that our parents taught us right from wrong, unlike that lot who brought Blueblood into the world."

"Now hold on a minute." Cadence put a hoof to Shining's chest, a critical tone present in her voice. "Prince Blueblood is a product of carefully planned out, intentional incest, and he turned out just fine. There are really no consequences unless you go overboard with it. Besides, just because your parents believe it is wrong does not make their thoughts common opinion."

"I know more than a few ponies who would tell you that incest should be against the law." Shining met his wife tit for tat, finding it more than a little strange that the alicorn of love would be so approving. "In fact, if I were in charge, I would have it join stallion flashing on the list of things outlawed for public health and safety."

"Stallion flashing was actually a very popular pastime. The seasoned mares leading hapless stallions along with no intention of doing anything more than robbing them blind. Really taught me about the other side of love without having to get my flank dirty."

Shining gave his wife a look of incredulity. "Did Celestia actually permit that? Like, really? Where was I for this?"

Cadence smiled and tapped Shining's muzzle with a hoof teasingly. "Just yanking your tail, like you yanked mine when you told me in relative public that you don't accept incest."

Cadence returned her hoof to her throne and flipped her mane, giggling all the while. Shining, unfortunately, missed the joke, for he had been quite serious.

"Incest is not commonly accepted. Case closed. The act is hardly anything to brag about, and is so unlikely to be seen in any respectable household that some ponies don't even know the meaning of the word."

"Acceptance and performance are two completely different things!" Cadence once again was insistent, and by now had cast aside entirely Twilight's letter. "However unlikely that it is commonly practiced in Canterlot, if a brother and a sister, a father and son, or mother and daughter love each other in that kind of way, there is nothing wrong with their expression of said feelings."

Shining raised a brow. On one hoof, yes, acceptance was not practice, and so was not as terrible as promoting through example. On the other hoof, Shining did not want to encourage anypony to start getting any ideas, or worse, to give ideas to a younger audience still developing their ideas about what was proper behavior.

"The answer is that incest is wrong, no matter what, and is not commonly acceptable behavior. Done. I do not think anymore needs to be said on the topic."

Cadence leaned back in her throne, gazing up towards the roof, as if words were written upon it. She took a deep breath, as if attempting to gather a way to explain what she meant without having to deviate too much. When she finally seemed to gain inspiration, Shining felt the makings of a brief, but academic discussion coming on. How could he tell? Cadence's chest filled with air, her mouth opened flexibly (not rigid like one about to deliver a curt reprimand), her ears flicked in a 270 degree swivel, and her eyes focused in on her target's very soul through their pupils. Attention was requested but not demanded, for who, at muzzle distance, could truly ignore the mare with a ready tongue and confident demeanor?

"Well, by Equestrian law, no pony can legally discriminate against another pony because of race, creed, nor choice of mate. And since laws are generally accepted rights and wrongs of a society, then it would stand to reason that by accepting that law and choosing to follow it, law-abiding Equestrians as a whole, including unicorns like yourself dear, accept any kind of pony-pony relations, including incestuous ones."

Shining was neither convinced nor defeated, and with a frown he countered, "Cadence, just because you follow the law does not mean you accept it-"

"Do I need to get the dictionary?" Cadence playfully teased, already having a guard on stand-by down the hall, "Guard, fetch us a modern dictionary!"

The blue crystal stallion nodded and quickly dashed off to do the bidding of his princess. The likelihood that he had been listening in on the entire thing was high, and it seemed that he was awaiting his cue for retrieve a dictionary. It would not take long, the library was hardly a gallop's distance away, but it might would seem ridiculous under regular circumstances.


Shining did not believe that a dictionary alone would make the point, and he would make this perception clear to Cadence by a playful jest. He put his hooves up in surrender, his right arm bent over his head as if he were about to faint at any moment. "Oh no, not the dictionary! Celestia save me from the power of definitions! Help, help!"

Giggles and laughs abound concealed the hoofsteps of the returning guard. From his magical grip to Cadence's, the large dictionary that had served the royal couple well had already begun to show signs of wear; the cover was worn and slightly tainted, and a few pages were sticking out from the abuse that the book had been through in the tussles of bedtime battles. Shining was no literary, but he never would have thought that he would enjoy cracking open a dictionary with his wife before bedtime.

"Thank you." Cadence nodded to the guard in dismissal. The guard bowed in return and left without a word.

It did not take long for Cadence to find what she was looking for. Like a master at work, she scanned the page, searching for the definition that would most make her point. Shining looked over her shoulder, but knew it was in vain to try to pick one that would favor him. Cadence would have never brought the dictionary into this had she not known it would favor her side of the discussion.

Shining raised a curious brow until his wife, with her magic and a smug expression, turned the dictionary in mid-air so that it would be directly in Shining's sight the definition of the word acceptance.



ac·cept·ance
əkˈseptəns/
noun
noun: acceptance; plural noun: acceptances

1.

the action of consenting to receive or undertake something offered.

"charges involving the acceptance of bribes"

synonyms: receipt, receiving, taking, obtaining More

"the acceptance of an award"

undertaking, assumption

"the acceptance of responsibility"

yes, affirmative reply, confirmation

"acceptances to an invitation"

a draft or bill that is accepted by being signed.

2.

the action or process of being received as adequate or suitable, typically to be admitted into a group.

"you must wait for acceptance into the club"

synonyms: welcome, favorable reception, adoption

"her acceptance into the group"

"And?" Shining could read, and he already knew the definition of acceptance. This did not seem to really drive either of their points into the ground anymore than they had been before this supposed revelation.

"Well law abiding citizens accept the law, and thus accept the principle that all ponies of differing mate tastes are worthy of being protected by law, and thus accepted members of society. Hence, their actions are also received as adequate for that protection, as the law forbids ostracizing over it, and with that is my argument. What then is your argument that unicorns do not technically accept incest?"

Cadence had the dictionary. But Shining Armor had reality, and in the context of things, that was certainly more valuable. Shining cleared his throat, a warm feeling in his chest as his wife's attentive and rather large eyes sought to extract his rebuttal from mere eye contact alone. Her ears were more in a relaxed state, but they now faced outwards towards him. Shining began in brief, knowing that a full length story would take the rest of the night.

"When my folks sat me down and talked to me about the griffons and the pegasi, they made it very clear that, regardless of any rules or laws, incest was wrong," Shining argued, "When I went to school, any mare or stallion serious about their close family in that kind of way could only get a head shake. Maybe it was technically breaking the law, but colts and fillies will be colts and fillies, and they can be oh so cruel. Even I remember cracking a joke about Blueblood, asking if his parents just failed to attract anypony better than each other."

"And how did he respond?" Cadence seemed interested to know, though Shining could have sworn he had already told her the tale.

"He teared up and cried about how much it blew being an only child. I could only retort that it was a good thing so he couldn't carry on such a abominable tradition."

Cadence gasped, and brought a hoof to her chest. She seemed very much concerned for some reason, perhaps even offended by the story. Seriously, Shining could have sworn that he had went over this story with her at least once prior to now. Even if he hadn't, it was not like this had been some private matter between the two.

"I don't remember any of that. I always thought it was Blueblood's pride in his lineage that caused some of his classmates to dislike him. I didn't think it was because of something completely out of his control."

Blueblood taking pride in generations of incest in order to keep some kind of royal blood in the family when it was clear that Celestia was never actually going to kick the bucket and have to pass rule on to one of her descendents (and that is not even counting Luna's return from the moon) was exactly the reason he could have been considered a freak back in the day. His attitude towards his "lessers" that developed later in life did very little to smooth things over, and regardless of whatever shenanigans may have been given by outside appearances, incest was a no-no behind closed doors as far as Shining Armor was aware of.

Canterlot was a place of political correctness. And anypony specifically stating that incest was wrong and that the ponies who enjoy it should be imprisoned would have to kiss their political careers farewell. Because all it took was one pony to try to relate it to the double stallion standard for the courts to get involved. And once in the court system, no issue left unchanged and unblistered by precedence. So on the surface, or perhaps out of later guilt, a shocking number of unicorns in Canterlot did actually give the appearance of incest through forged "immigrants" of the unicorn variety. Most of the populace (including Blueblood) knew better though, and it was not like the rest of Equestria really cared much in the grand scheme of things. It was an inside joke sort of thing.


And yet, here was Cadence, showing some sort of sympathy for him. Then again, Cadence was rarely one to victim blame, either by profession or simply out of her nature. She was genuinely supportive of the idea that incest was legitimately an accepted concept in society. It had been laughable at first, but by this point, it had gotten somewhat concerning that she had been so oblivious. Cadence sighed, melancholy temporarily sinking in. "Poor stallion, it is not his fault that his family's efforts have been so vigorous."


While Shining always enjoyed a good personal laugh at the stallion, the deviation from answering the question needed to return to the crux of why he had revisited that tale in the first place. After all, this was all out of Twilight's sphere of interests back during her time in Canterlot; it could be forgiven and understood how she completely missed this vital lesson on mature matters. The importance now was that she learned the proper response to her question.

"Anyways, if that is not proof enough that unicorns do not accept incest, then I do not know what to tell you. No title, no crown, no fancy dress is going to make it anymore accepted among unicorns." Shining might would have added "case closed" again at the end, but he did not want to give Cadence anymore reason to carry on challenging an issue settled long before it had began by the residents of Canterlot and beyond.

Cadence sighed in seeming defeat, levitated a clear piece of paper and pen, and looked about ready to write. The dictionary loftily remained in the air by Cadence's own will. Before she composed their lettered response, however, she shifted a glance towards Shining with a gleam of mischief present. For all his efforts, Shining knew that Cadence insisted on ending on a bright note and tone. He sensed one last statement incoming.

"So, if you and Twilight were the last of equine kind, and there was no other way to save equine society than to commit a few acts of incest to repopulate, then it would be acceptable behavior then to allow equine kind to forever fold into the pages of history?"

Figures Cadence would get around to asking that question. Of all of the possible questions to pose, Cadence had to pose the most predictable of them all as her final nail and hammer. Despite a duty to defend Equestrian and, by nature, attempt to preserve his own in all of his endeavors, his morality would certainly overtake duty on this one. Or at least, that is what he would say in this relatively private space; if Celestia were to ask him, he would have to be a little more conscious of why she was asking in case his position were in jeopardy for placing morals over duty.

"Yes, I would rather watch equine society die out. Wrong is wrong no matter the circumstance. To accept incest even in desperate times would be to also accept it as a possible course of action." No hesitation did he reveal, no thought-provoked pause to heighten the suspense or suggest that his answer was anything less than the complete truth.

Cadence's slightly parted her mouth again, suggesting that she was either surprised by the answer or had intended on offering a comment. Words did not leave her mouth though, and after a brief moment of deep thought, she hastily wrote on the paper. She rolled up the letter in preparation for sending. Before she did though, she looked towards Shining one more time, as if to confirm the accuracy message that she was about to send out.

"So we are going with the assumption that, as Captain of the Royal Guard, you would know and be of the same opinion of many of the unicorns in Canterlot and hence, many of the unicorns in Equestria, correct?"

Shining nodded, and with that, Cadence sent the letter on its way.



Spike had went to bed early, and had already gotten quite comfortable when Twilight finally came to her own bed. Lounging, she rested her head onto her hooves, thinking on the events from earlier. She would be disturbed by a noise that commonly announced the arrival of news from the Princess, but tonight would announce a response from a slightly different correspondent.

Breeelchk!

Twilight recognized that sound, and at once her ears shot up into the air; the gentle sound of paper hitting floor alerted her to the response from Cadence and Shining Armor. It had not even been a hour ago that she had sent it out; apparently there had been very little discussion between the two regarding the matter. It was nighttime now though, and the gentle moonlight, though beautiful, was poor for the sake of reading.

Good thing there was always hornlight. Lighting her horn so that it would shine much like a lamp, Twilight took the parchment from Spike's small bed, levitated it above the grumbling dragon, and unfurled it. Using the light of her horn, she read the letter in earnest:

Dear Twilight,

Ladybugs and sunshine bright, the topic matter that you asked about seemed rather odd for a mare your age, but Shining and I have come to the conclusion that true incest accepted not just by unicorns, but by Equestrians by and large. The reason should have been very obvious to you, but it's okay if such topics are not a part of your research. By law, Equestrians cannot discriminate for any arbitrary reason, including a pony's choice in mate. Incest falls under that category. Since incest is not against the law, and most Equestrians both accept and follow the law and the morals behind it, then it stands to reason that most Equestrians implicitly accept incest. I believe you may choose what you wish, and that it is neither wrong nor unacceptable if there are truly feelings between the two. But I digress, Shining would suggest that I am a minority from Canterlot thinking such.

However, that does not at all mean that they regularly act on this legal acceptance. In fact, the population of Canterlot is less interbred then one may be led to believe; Blueblood and his lineage are the exception, not the regulars, at least nowadays. It is an old pegasus jibe that unicorns continued the tradition for the sake of maintaining as pure of Celestia's royal blood as possible on a wide scale. A stereotype. In private the majority, including Shining Armor, do not seem to accept incest.

Even so, by law, all Equestrians would technically have to respond that they do in fact accept incest if they were to be asked in a very public setting, since the law puts incestuous couples on an equal footing as all other types of couples. To not accept it in public would suggest that a shop owner might not serve known incestuous couples the same, and might be under scrutiny for their actions. It is politically correct to be accepting of all lawfully protected behavior that presents no immediate threat to the safety of the nation. Therefore, since incestuous couples are accepted members of society, then their actions are also deemed worthy of admittance into society. Acceptance is the law, but neither private acceptance nor participation is all that common, at least among the unicorns Shining Armor may speak for.

To put this into perspective, Shining Armor would rather allow the entire equine race to die out than participate in such an act with you. Indulging in it even in that desperate of a situation would be considering it a last ditch effort worth of consideration, or so Shining puts it.

Your ever loving Sister-in-law and Brother,

Cadence and Shining Armor

Twilight had been expecting to have to go through her books some more to find the answer to some cryptic message, but oddly enough, this was very straightforward. Then again, Cadence tended to be less of a mysstic than Celestia in responding to inquiries, and-

Wait.

"Shining Armor would rather allow the equine race to die out than participate in such an act with you".

Twilight looked up from the letter. Now just what was that supposed to mean? Is he suggesting that if it were their mother the situation might would be different? Twilight was unsure of quite how she wanted to take the message. Sure, Shining would decline because he was morally against incest (apparently quite strongly at that) but with their entire race at stake, wouldn't morals take a backseat to the salvation of the equine race?

"Apparently not." upon hearing herself say that aloud, Twilight picked up on a hint of surprise. Well, her question had been concretely answered all the same, and in a way that was not entirely out of her original line of thinking. "Huh. No wonder Rarity saw reason to correct Sweetie Belle if the objection is that strong. But what's the point in the law covering incest if it is so disliked?"

"To discourage late night discussions on it I would guess." Spike grumbled sleepily, turning over in his basket bed. While it was unlikely that Spike had already fallen into a deep sleep, especially after being disturbed by the arrival of the letter, it stood to reason that he was at least tired, and not very keen on being kept up on the matter.

Twilight chuckled and stored the letter in a drawer for safe-keeping. "You're right Spike. First thing in the morning I am going over to Rarity's to make sure she and Sweetie Belle are all caught up."


The next morning, after a breakfast of waffles dipped in syrup washed down with a few glasses of apple juice, Twilight set off for the Carousal Boutique. When she arrived, she had expected to see Rarity hard at work with some client on the first floor. Rather, she instead entered the shop to the sight of a scattered mess. Papers were everywhere, pencils were haphazardly strewn about the floor, and the ceiling had what looked to be drawings on it.

The Crusaders must have paid Rarity a visit in the night. She could see crude images of ponies, some in admittedly akward positioning, and what seemed to be some little artist's interpretation of what the had learned. Sweetie no doubt would get a scolding for this if Rarity were unaware.

"Rarity?" Twilight called, but received no answer. If Rarity were not on the first floor, then she was probably on the second floor. It was not like Rarity to sleep in late, even on a weekend. While she might could return at a more convenient time, the schedule demanded that she first attend to this matter first and foremost.

Maneuvering about the pencils that seemed strategically placed to cause a pony to slip and roll about the floor in clumsy agony, Twilight passed the mess and started up the stairs. She could hear Rarity's voice, and what sounded like tapping. Pushing open the door to the second floor, Twilight looked to behold the headquarters of Ponyville's resident fashinista.

It had been transformed from a room of cloth, linen, and an assortment of other stitching materials ready to be used into a sort of miniature classroom, with Sweetie Belle dead center seated on a cushion. Various images resembling the crude drawings downstairs were stitched to blankets all over the room, hanging either by thumb tacks or some unseen adhesive. These drawing were far more detailed, and Twilight could guess that Rarity and Sweetie had indeed carried on their conversation about incest, along with a few related topics. Closer to the center where Sweetie sat, was Rarity who seemed to have strung up a clothes line for the sake of weaving into blankets, very swiftly Twilight might would add, some sort of narrative together. The currently active blanket was yellow with blue thread used as to construct the desired image. The yellow background and the blue foreground at least made it clear to tell what was going on: a griffon and a pegasus together on a cloud home with a large sword stitched between them.

"And so, the griffons and the pegasi became enemies thereafter; but only after the rumor of Hurricane and Typhoon spending the night together had circulated. Much like unicorn incest, it is only a misconception, and not a fact, that griffons and pegasi ever have had any special relations with each other. Now do you understand Sweetie Belle?"

Sweetie nodded, her eyes wide and her body seemingly buzzing with excitement. It was at this point that Rarity noticed that she had a visitor.

"Oh, hello Twilight! I was just clearing some things up with Sweetie Belle."

"So she gets that unicorn incest is accepted legally, but not privately accepted nor practiced by unicorn society?" If so, then Twilight had just made a rather blank trip.

"Actually, it is neither accepted nor practiced regularly!" Sweetie announced, hopping from her cushion like a rocket in order to come straight up to Twilight. "It's jut a myth, just like griffons and ponies mating together some one thousand years ago."

Well, while Twilight was very sure about that not being complete myth, it seemed that they had come to a similar conclusion on their own. Twilight smiled, for that meant that she did not need to go over the entire response in order to explain to them the answer he had been offered by her elder siblings.

"More or less, since by law, all Equestrians, not just unicorns are required to accept incest in an implicit fashion. So not just unicorns, but all law-abiding members of Equestria technically accept incest as the law is now. But you are right, it is not practiced nor privately considered appropriate nearly as much as the joke suggests."

"Sounds like we need to start a petition to change that." Rarity levitated about scissors and cut down the clothesline presentation, looking for a new space to hang her completed work of art. It seemed she might save them for another time, and for a brief while would leave them hanging in case she needed them.

"Yup! I'll go get the paper!" Sweetie zoomed downstairs, hardly galloping and practically flying.

There was little doubt that Sweetie would talk to her friends about it, and they might very well come by for the same general lecture if they were confused. And considering how well Sweetie telephoned information, there was a great possibility of that. Not to mention she might require them in order to explain why ponies should or should not sign the petition.

But, then again, this petition was a very public outlet.

"Rarity, are you sure you want to go the route of a petition?" Twilight inquired, "Might be quite a few ponies who will be offended."

Rarity laughed and trotted over to her friend, putting a hoof around her shoulders as she gestured about the wall. "You said it yourself, it is not commonly accepted except under threat of breaking the law. So if a few ponies get their manes in a ruffle over it, who cares? The majority will sign the petition, Celestia will alter the wording of the law, and we can carry on with how we truly feel about incest without worrying about the rights of others. After all, who worth noting would dare oppose?"