Based on The Simpsons Treehouse of Horror episode, "Nightmare on Evergreen Terrace;" after the events of Equestria girls, Sunset Shimmer and others experience terrifying, painful nightmares, only to wake up and find out that the punishment
A collaboration with my old friend DarthWill3, based on The Simpsons Treehouse of Horror episode, "Nightmare on Evergreen Terrace;" after the events of Equestria girls, Sunset Shimmer and others experience terrifying, painful nightmares, only to wake up and find out that the punishment dished out to them in these dreams is being replicated in real life...
It seemed just like a typical day at any typical beach. The sun shone brightly, with not but a single cloud anywhere in the sky to obstruct it. The waves did their normal routine of breaking and crashing onto the edge of the beach before retreating and repeating the process. And the beach itself just sat there, hot, white and sandy as always. The seagulls foraged for small creatures, the turtles tended to their nests, and the crabs retreated down their holes to avoid the seagulls.
Not a single sentient being was on the beach at the moment, except, of course, Sunset Shimmer, the villainous girl who had recently been reformed into a "good guy" when Twilight Sparkle and friends performed an exorcism on her that banished her inner demons. And so now, here she was on the beach, flaunting her ever-so-voluptuous body in an extremely lacy black bikini, and wielding a Frisbee. With her was Winona the dog, the pet of Shimmer's enemy-turned-friend Applejack.
"Okay, Winona, fetch!" Sunset called out as she hurled the Frisbee, which spun like a UFO as it flew above Winona's head. Ever determined, Winona gave a great leap into the air, a leap normally reserved for creatures like kangaroos, and caught the Frisbee right square in her jaws.
"Good catch, girl!" Sunset commended.
At that point, Winona suddenly stood up on her hind legs and took the Frisbee from her mouth. "Thanks, Sunset!" she answered in a British accent and threw it back at her companion.
Sunset, however, for some unexplainable reason, did not acknowledge that anything was out of the ordinary. Instead, she simply ran backwards, looking to catch the Frisbee just as Winona had just done. Then, when she jumped up to try and catch it, the Frisbee hit her right square in the face, sending her into a back-flip just as she plummeted to the sand on her back. Her moment of physical pain was evidenced by the words NO SALE appearing in all caps in her eyes, the huge stump sticking out from the top of her head, and the birds that had just appeared, flying around her head.
"Oh, hard luck," Winona commented as Sunset helped herself back up her feet, her cartoon-like injuries suddenly disappearing the blink of an eye, as per customary in any cartoon.
"It's okay, girl, I got it."
But then, just as she bent over to pick up the Frisbee, she noticed a large, long, creepy shadow cast from her left. A long pointed shape, looking like a claw, stuck out.
Nervously, Sunset turned to face the shadow and screamed with her eyes bulging out of her head when she saw a most horrifying sight—a gray-skinned man with white hair, and matching eyebrows and goatee. His eyes were crimson, surrounded by light yellow scleras. He wore a greenish-brown fedora, a red-and-green striped sweater, grey trousers, and black dress shoes. He was wielding a metal rake, staring down at Sunset with murderous intent.
Sunset was too shocked to yell again; rather, she simply held up a picket sign that said "SAVE ME, PRINCESS CELESTIA!" a method of communication made popular by cartoon villain Wile E. Coyote. Unfortunately, Princess Celestia failed to appear.
The gray-skinned man brandished his rake. "Glad to rake your acquaintance, Sunset Shimmer," he lavished. And with an evil, maniacal laugh, he swiped the rake at Sunset's belly...
At that precise moment, Sunset shrieked aloud, thinking that it was all over for her, that this was her time.
Suddenly, she noticed that she was in her bed, which was heavily soaked with her own sweat, in her own rented apartment room. She wasn't at the beach at all. Neither the talking Winona nor that cheap imitation of a serial killer was to be found.
"Phew. It was just a crazy dream," she sighed as she pulled down her covers.
But she soon changed her mind as she took notice of the lower part of her pajama shirt; it was torn, and on her belly, there were extremely bloody scrapes running across her belly, scrapes very much reminiscent of what would've been made by an attack from the gray-skinned man in his dreams. The mere sight, combined with a thought, resulted in an extremely hair-raising scream released from the bowels of Sunset's lungs.
She only stopped screaming at a sudden knock on the door.
"ShimMERRRR!" It was the landlady. "Is that you screaming bloody murder in there?"
"Uh, y-y-yes…"
"You're three days behind on your rent!"
"I'll get on that," Sunset groaned as she hurled her body out of bed.
Later that day, Shimmer was walking with Rarity and her younger sister Sweetie Belle on the way to Canterlot High School. She chose Rarity, who was wearing a red baseball cap for some reason, to confide to about her nightmare. Of course, Sweetie Belle couldn't stay of the conversation for long.
"...and he scratched me with his rake!" Sunset finished, lifting her shirt to reveal the bloody scrapes.
Needless to say, Rarity was startled beyond belief. "Good Lord, Sunset!" she gasped. "You need to see Nurse Redheart immediately!"
At around that time, they neared the entrance to the school.
Sunset tucked her shirt back down to hide the scrapes. "That's the first thing in my list before class, Rarity," she explained. "But you know what the weirdest part of it was? That guy looked like the janitor who disappeared from this school last year: Groundskeeper Discord!"
Realizing a coincidence between their situations, Rarity let out another gasp. "Oh my...! Groundskeeper Discord was in my dream as well, darling! Only he..."
With her eyes streaming tears, Sweetie Belle clung to Rarity, whimpering, "He... he turned into a furnace, and... and..." She stopped, revealing a small burn on her right hand before continuing, "And almost ate me alive!" She broke down onto Rartiy's skirt, sobbing.
"Gosh, Sweetie Belle, I'm... I'm so sorry," Sunset replied, not knowing what else to say.
As Sweetie Belle continued to choke out sobs, Rarity knelt down and wrapped her sister in her arms. "Shhh... It's okay, Sweetie Belle," she whispered, soothingly. "That bad man can't hurt you now."
Having overheard their conversation, more friends of theirs—Applejack (who wasn't wearing her trademark cowboy hat for some reason), her little sister Apple Bloom, their big brother Big Macintosh, Fluttershy, Rainbow Dash and Scootaloo—arrived on the scene.
"You too?!" Apple Bloom asked, anxiously. "Discord had me shrunk and whacked with his broom!"
"I was locked in his shack—full of falling sharp tools!" added Scootaloo, her arms covered with band-aids.
"He almost crushed me with giant manure bags," cut in Big Mac. "Had to use a lotta shampoo to get the stink off."
Upon saying this, he was consoled by a warm hug from Fluttershy, who happened to be his girlfriend. "Oh, my poor, brave big Mac," she crooned.
"Don't you worry none, Fluttershy," reassured Big Mac. "Ah'll be just fine. See y'all round." He pecked Fluttershy on the cheek and took his leave.
"Just don't get into too much cider out on the farm, ya hear?" called out Applejack.
"Eeyup!" called Big Mac as he exited the building.
Returning to the business at hand, Applejack told the girls what happened in her dream. "That darn Discord came close to runnin' me through the head with his pitchfork. Mah scalp still itches," she added as she scratched her head. "More importantly... LOOK WHAT HE DID TO MAH HAT!" Outraged, she held out a light brown cowboy hat, which was half-torn and ripped up.
Rarity, upon seeing the state of the hat, shook her head. "Some people just don't appreciate fashion these days."
Rainbow Dash, in a mixture of awe and fear, spoke next. "He turned into this awesome monster tractor and chased me through the soccer field! Could've run me over if I hadn't heard Fluttershy crying for help in our pool."
Concerned about that last part, Sunset turned to Fluttershy and asked, "What... what happened?"
"H-h-h-h-h-he had me sleepwalk outside," she said, shaking in fear. "In my dream, I was d-d-d-d-dancing on the b-b-beach, when suddenly... I found myself fall into the ocean. Before I knew it, Discord came at me in the form of a sh-sh-sh-sh-sh-sh-shark and..." Her voice trailed off as she rolled up her left sock, revealing ominous-looking tooth marks on her ankle.
Gasps of horror echoed throughout the entire circle of friends, except Rainbow, who swore to herself that she'd seen those marks before.
"He p-p-p-p-p-pulled me under the water," Fluttershy whimpered, tearing up. "I could've drowned..."
Rainbow reached out, slung an arm around Fluttershy and dried her eyes with her free hand, comforting her. "Lucky thing I was around to save you, little sis," she asserted. "Just don't try any more shark movie rip-offs without me, okay?"
"Now that you've mentioned it, Fluttershy," began Sunset, "I heard that Discord was once the school's swim teacher."
"Yup, he sure was," Applejack confirmed, "'til Principal Celestia had the pool shut down four years ago."
"What for?"
"Meh," Rainbow shrugged. "Some maniac filled it with salt water and put in a live tiger shark. For laughs. Vice-Principal Luna's never lived that down after diving in."
"And then Discord became Groundskeeper?" Sunset reasoned. "That... makes sense."
Before anyone could answer, Pinkie Pie suddenly burst out of an adjacent locker. Everyone was surprised, not just by the way Pinkie made her entrance, but also by the way her body was gleaming from head to toe like a car just out of the wash.
"Ah! What did Discord do to you, Pinkie Pie?" reeled Sunset as shielded her eyes from the light reflecting off of her friend's body.
With a beaming face that suggested a more positive experience than what the other girls had been through as of late, Pinkie giggled. "He ran his floor buffer over me! It really tickled! I laughed so hard, I felt like dying!"
Rarity, being the fashion whiz of the group, was the only one that took any interest in Pinkie's abnormal level of shininess. "Why, Pinkie!" she marveled. "You look absolutely crystal clear, if I dare say so myself."
At that moment, a chuckling, accompanied by the sound of approaching footsteps was heard. Everyone turned to see Principal Celestia, accompanied by her sister Vice-Principal Luna, approaching them.
"Girls, we couldn't help overhearing your conversation," laughed Celestia.
"There's no mystery about Discord," smiled Luna. "He... well, he simply disappeared."
Noticing the nervous delivery of that last phrase, Rainbow grew suspicious. "Just like that, huh?" she mysteriously intoned.
"Just like that," Celestia echoed. "One might say he even retired on short notice."
Not knowing what to think, Sunset nervously replied, "Um... yeah, I guess so."
"Excellent!" affirmed Luna. "Now what do you say we just have no more curiosity about this bizarre cover-up..." She and Celestia walked away, leaving all the girls, except Pinkie, to exchange nervous glances as they wondered what Luna could've meant just now.
"Well I'm convinced!" perked up Pinkie.
"Convinced by what, exactly?"
Everyone turned and looked to see Flash Sentry, but what really made them gasp is the sight of his hair pointing up in a wild fashion. He looked as if he had been struck by lightning. This was further indicated by an electrical charge running up his hair.
"Whoa! Love the new hairdo!" marveled Rainbow Dash. "Where'd you get that?"
"Groundskeeper Discord. Put the nozzle on his hose in full throttle when I was playing guitar. Right into my amp." As soon as Flash finished speaking, another electrical charge built up around him.
Emotion overwhelmed Sunset, a look of horror crossing her face. "Oh no, Flashy… Not you, too!" She attempted to pull her ex-boyfriend into a hug to comfort him, only to get zapped. The electricity raced through her for only a split-second—just enough to visibly shake her. Her body started to billow smoke like a chimney.
Pinkie tried hard not to laugh at Sunset's unintended pun.
"You're lucky to have your hair in one piece, Flash Sentry," said Rarity, sympathetically, "and I mean it. It would certainly never do to be seen in such a public place as this looking close to bald. You'd practically be a laughing stock!"
"Uh, thanks, Rarity... I guess," Flash replied uneasily.
At that instant, Sunset remembered that Rarity had not said anything about her dream. "Wait a minute. What did you say Discord got you with, Rarity?"
In a humiliated half-whisper, Rarity answered, "Hedge clippers."
"Is that why you're wearing this silly hat to school today all of a sudden?" asked Pinkie as she put a hand on Rarity's hat.
"No! Pinkie Pie, don't-"
But it was too late. Pinkie snatched Rarity's hat away and everyone, save Sweetie Belle, looked in horror of what had happened to the fashion expert. Her head was missing a significant amount of hair. Apart from a few remaining long indigo strands, it had been completely cut short. All the other students in the immediate area stared at Rarity. Some could be heard struggling with holding their laughter in.
"Uh, oops," uttered Pinkie as Rarity's eyes welled up from overwhelming embarrassment. She began to cry loudly, shedding large amounts of tears like a fountain. She ran off into the ladies' room, her sobs muffled behind the door.
"Oh, the pain...!" she wailed.
"This could take a while," Sweetie Belle sighed as she left down the west hall with Apple Bloom and Scootaloo.
"C'mon, Fluttershy," said Sunset. "Let's get to Nurse Redheart before class starts."
"I'll let Miss Cheerilee know where you are," called Flash as he headed down the east hall. "Just be careful."
"Thanks, Flash." answered Sunset. "You too." And with that, she proceeded to help the limping Fluttershy down the central corridor, leaving only Applejack, Pinkie, and Rainbow. They could still hear Rarity howling inside the lavatory. Water could be seen escaping from under the door.
"So, who's gonna get the mop?" Rainbow wondered aloud.
Later, at the cafeteria, it was lunchtime. Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo had gotten their trays full and were searching for a table, where they could settle in.
As they looked, Scootaloo asked, "Got any ideas for our next music video?"
"Nah," answered Sweetie Belle.
"Ah've got zip," replied Apple Bloom.
"Same here," Scootaloo sighed. "Guess Discord's got us all out of whack today."
Shortly thereafter, the girls found an empty table on the entrance's left side, where they sat down and started to dig in to their meals.
"Hey! What are you losers doing in our private table?!"
The trio knew that voice, but it sounded a bit more nasal than usual. They looked to their left and find, to their surprise, Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon crossing their arms in contempt.
Even more startling, Diamond Tiara had a bandage around her nose, which explained the voice. Her whole body was covered in bruises, from head to toe. Though she tended to look indifferent, she could be seen wincing from the pain.
Silver Spoon, acting less intimidating, was shaking slightly. Her eyes were looking left from right, as if a burglar might have been lurking. Cracks were barely noticeable on the right lens of her glasses.
"What happened to you?" Sweetie Belle asked, showing genuine concern.
"None of your beeswax, Dorkie Belle!" Diamond Tiara snapped. "Now, if you don't mind..." Her voice suddenly trailed off as he took notice of Sweetie Belle's hand. "Where did you get that burn?"
"And what's with all the band-aids?" Silver Spoon asked Scootaloo.
"Would you believe that we all had a narrow escape from Groundskeeper Discord last night?" Scootaloo answered half-heartedly.
Silver Spoon and Diamond Tiara's skins suddenly went pale.
"Greenskeeper?" Apple Bloom, Scootaloo, and Sweetie Belle were all confused.
"He worked at my father's country club on summers and weekends," explained Diamond Tiara. "Right before he disappeared last year."
"We were both there in our dreams," said Silver Spoon before drawing in a deep breath. "I was practicing a few swings for the eighteenth hole, when Discord sneaked behind me and... and... Well, I don't know how, but he... turned me into a gopher!"
Apple Bloom, Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle were all utterly speechless for a few moments before Apple Bloom said flatly, "Seriously?"
"Yes!" exclaimed Silver Spoon. "He always chased them away when they'd cause trouble in the golf course! You know how pesky gophers are nowadays! Then, Discord looked down at me, with a hoe in his hands. And that smile…" She shuddered. "You saw his creepy smile, right?" she asked, to which Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo gravely nodded.
"Thought as much. Anyway, he swung his hoe at me. I managed to get out of the way before it hit the ground. I ran and I ran before I found a gopher hole to dive into. I thought I was safe... until he tried to flood me out with a hose!"
"One of his favorite methods," Diamond Tiara broke in. "Less damaging to the surface areas. Cost-free. Less risk of..."
"Ahem! If you're finished," Silver Spoon broke in before continuing. "Luckily, I know the course like the back of my hand. I found my way into the sewer system and clung to a pipe, waiting for the hose to be turned off.
"I felt like I outsmarted Discord. But I was wrong. I heard barking. One of the club's bloodhounds tracked me down. I forgot all about them!"
"It was my dad's idea, in case Discord needed backup," added Diamond Tiara. "He always did plan ahead."
Rolling her eyes, Silver Spoon went on, "I was so scared. I didn't know what Discord was going to do next. But then, after several minutes, I dared to peak out of a hole. I saw him holding a detonator, which was wired to a lot of dynamite sticks all over the course! He was going to blow me sky high!"
"Cool!" marveled Scootaloo, only to get scolding looks from Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle. "What?" she asked, her face reddening. "I mean, it sounded cool."
"The hounds cleared the area as soon Discord was ready," carried on Silver Spoon. "He yelled 'Four!' and pressed down the detonator. He laughed like a lunatic in triumph. Before I knew it, I was close to one of the dynamite sticks. I wasn't that too close, but it was so loud, it almost made my eardrums bleed! And then... I woke up."
"Golly!" exclaimed Apple Bloom. "You were lucky to get outta there alive!"
"You think that was bad? I had it worse!" insisted Diamond Tiara. "Ow…" She clutched her side in pain.
"You mean with all the bruises and the..." Scootaloo's voice trailed off, as she was hesitant on saying the word "nose."
"Yeah," confirmed Diamond Tiara. "Discord had me turned into a golf ball. He hit me a couple of times with his club. I was flying through the air and then landed on the ground. Those weren't exactly soft landings. For a moment, I thought I was gonna drown in one of the watering hazards. But I realized something worse: when Discord was younger, he was..." She shuddered before finishing, "a professional golfer!"
"Never sliced a swing," Silver Spoon added for good measure.
"So how'd you wake up?" asked Apple Bloom curiously.
"On the last teeing ground, I was facing backwards," explained Diamond Tiara, trembling. "Then, Discord gave one last swing and... broke my nose."
That last detail caused Apple Bloom, Scootaloo, and Sweetie Belle to cringe—this immediately gave way to sympathy. Sympathy for the very girls who always tormented them at every given opportunity.
"Gee... Sorry to hear that, Diamond Tiara," crooned Sweetie Belle.
"You know what? Forget it!" snapped Diamond Tiara, reassuming her prideful stance. "I don't need your pity! And you can keep the table. We'll find another one."
As soon as she finished, she and Silver Spoon left the other girls to their lunches; all the while, she could be heard groaning hoarsely as her side continues to throb painfully.
Just then, a light, yet startling scream made the girls jump. To their right, they saw Snips escorting the jumpy, jittery, shuddering form of Snails to their table. Snips was wearing a cast on his left arm, which served as backup for holding his lunch tray. Snails could barely keep his food from spilling.
"Let me guess," Scootaloo said nonchalantly. "Groundskeeper Discord got to you in your dreams too?"
"Well, duh!" snapped Snips. "He made me jump off the second floor!"
The girls exchanged confused glances.
"Uh, why?" asked Sweetie Belle at last.
"Remember when I've always said that I hate Fancy class?" Snips asked, to which the girls nodded. "That was on the second floor. And Discord..." His voice grew filled with revulsion. "...was the substitute teacher! Went on and on with gynormous piles of Fancy words for hours! I couldn't take it anymore!" he exclaimed hysterically.
"Sacre bleu!" gasped Apple Bloom.
"And Snails?" inquired Sweetie Belle.
"He was being used as a human plunger. Every. Single. Toilet," said Snips in a low, ominous whisper.
The girls took a second to recoil from being grossed out at the thought of Snails having to deal with inhaling load upon load of the stench of urine and feces.
"Uh, I don't think he wants to talk about it right now," Snips said uneasily, escorting Snails away.
Sometime later that day, our heroines were in their last class of the day, in a neatly decked out classroom with desks positioned in four columns of five. Sunset was in the center left desk on the first row; Fluttershy at her right in the leftmost desk; Rainbow immediately behind Fluttershy on the second row; Flash at Rainbow's left and right behind Sunset and at Rainbow's right; Rarity in the rightmost desk on the third row; Trixie on Rartiy's immediate left; Applejack in the center left desk on the fourth row; and Pinkie in the leftmost desk on the fifth row.
The class' teacher, Miss Cheerilee, was handing out a test. "Remember, class," she said gleefully, "this test is only the first step toward your inevitable graduation. I know you will all do well," she added before muttering under her breath, "and put this school into another budget crisis." Shaking her head, she resumed her happy demeanor. "You've got less than an hour to..."
"Finished!" Sunset and Trixie proclaimed, both handing out their completed tests.
This incited waves of jaws to drop open all across the classroom, staring in a surprised state at Trixie. Sunset was no exception.
"Is there something wrong, Miss Cheerilee?" Trixie innocently asked.
Recovering from her startled state, Miss Cheerilee hastily replied, "Why, uh... no, Trixie. It's just that I always get fast results from Sunset Shimmer. But from you, that's quite a first."
"Well, I just want to be ready for tonight's show," Trixie said, loftily. "Can't afford to be focusing on tests all day." She went on in a real eerily dramatic tone. "The Great and Powerful Trixie is about to make a magnificent triumph!"
Rainbow, who couldn't care less about Trixie's exploits, replied sarcastically, "Oh, awesome. We'll totally be watching!"
"Not now, Rainbow Dash," Sunset snapped, shushing her friend before she could get herself in any trouble.
With an apathetic grunt, Miss Cheerilee shrugged. "Well, Trixie, why don't you and Sunset put your heads down on your desks and sit quietly for the remainder of class?"
"My pleasure," Trixie blustered as she did as the teacher suggested.
As for Sunset, she instead took out a book from her leather jacket, not quite bored enough for a nap. "Actually, Miss Cheerliee, I think I'll be reading a book, if you don't mind."
"Very well, Sunset," smiled Miss Cheerilee. "You've earned it."
"Thanks," replied Sunset as she started to read very intently. Trixie, in the meantime, fell fast asleep...
In her dream, Trixie was on a grand stage, with the lighting showing bright, and an audience looking on with sheer excitement. The curtains opened to reveal Trixie to the audience, dressed in her signature purple pointed hat. "Ladies and gentleman," she shouted in her self-introduction, "boys and girls... prepare to be awed and inspired by... the Great... and Powerful... Trixie!"
The air was thick with the explosive sounds of fireworks shooting up, accompanied by the audience's applause. The curtains closed, and with a puff of smoke, a six-foot long animatronic snake appeared from thin air. In a fit of rage it lunged at Trixie, closing in for the kill.
But with a quick thrust of her right arm, Trixie grabbed the snake by the neck, and threw it into the air with an unnatural level of strength. A clap of her hands and the snake suddenly disappeared in a flash of fire.
Amazed roars rippled through the audience as Trixie took her bows. "Thank you!" she called. "Thank you! Now feast your eyes as I perform the most thrilling... most dangerous... death-defying feat in the history of magic!"
Little did she know that as she spoke, Discord morphed out of the curtains and onto the stage, wearing a tuxedo colored light brown, dark red, gray, gold and pale yellow, along with a moderate amaranth dress shirt, purple vest, light blue bow tie, white gloves, pink socks, and black shoes. He stood above Trixie, his shadow looming above her as he wielded his rake.
Noticing the shadow, Trixie turned around and gasped in shock when she saw Discord staring her down, rake in hand.
"Define 'death-defying,' my dear," he sneered, grinning maniacally. He chuckled. "You've tamed a dead s-s-s-s-s-snake, but can you handle a live one?" As he hissed, he transformed himself into a 22-foot-long green anaconda with some sort of insane magical ability, coiled up and ready to strike.
Fearing for her life, Trixie ran off the stage, screaming shrilly. But her escape efforts were in vain as Discord reached out with his coils, wrapping around her and reeling her in. He squeezed harder and harder. His coils felt like walls of solid steel compressing a car into a cube as they forced the very life force of Trixie out of the body that it resided in. Discord hissed triumphantly as Trixie squirmed in helplessness.
As if that weren't bad enough, in real life, Trixie was twisting and screaming in her sleep; a gruesome reenactment of how Discord was doing her in her dream. As everyone looked on, startled, she suddenly slipped from her desk and collapsed, lying dead on the floor, eyes wide open, killed in real life just as she'd been killed in her dream.
The usually dim-witted Pinkie, slow to realize what just happened, suddenly burst out, "Ooh, is Trixie taking yoga classes?"
The answer to this uncalled for question was nothing but traumatized silence.
Principal Celestia and Vice-Principal Luna, accompanied by the not-too-bright Derpy Hooves, were quickly summoned to the scene. As they stared at Trixie's discolored carcass, Celestia and Luna exchanged glances, knowing all too well what had happened. Then, before any of the students could fully make out what had really happened, the body was placed up on a gurney and covered with a white sheet.
"Derpy, wheel her out quietly," whispered Celestia. "We don't want any of the other students to see what's happened."
"You can count on me, ma'am!" Derpy acknowledged.
But then, as she started to wheel the gurney out of the room, the sheet, which was stuck under Celestia's foot, came off, revealing the twisted, disfigured corpse of The Great and Powerful Trixie for all to see. The very sight caused Fluttershy to scream aloud until all the air left her body, causing her to faint.
"Oh, just get her out of here!" said a frustrated Celestia as she shook her head. And so, Derpy wheeled the body out into the hallway.
Next thing the Principals knew, they heard Scootaloo asking from down the hall, "Hey, what's up with Trixie?"
"Not in front of the children!" Luna called out to Derpy.
It was too late. The sounds of petrified screams from Scootaloo, Apple Bloom, and Sweetie Belle filled the hall. All Celestia and Luna could do was slap their palms to their faces in frustration.
That late afternoon, as Rarity and Sweetie Belle's mother was doing the dishes and their father was reading the paper, their two daughters burst in through the front door in a fit.
"Mother, Father!" Rarity cried out. "Trixie died in class today!"
"It was awful!" added Sweetie Belle.
"Really?" their mother said, in an unexpectedly carefree tone. "Aw, that's too bad, girls. 'Course, I don't see what that has to do with Groundskeeper Discord," she added, chuckling.
A long pause ensued, during which the sisters exchanged confused glances over their mother just having mentioned that very name.
"Um... we didn't say anything about Groundskeeper Discord, Mom," pointed out Sweetie Belle.
"Oh... right," their mom said haltingly. "Forgot to tell you about that."
"Why don't you girls sit down, while your mother and I tell about the whole shebang?" offered their father, who sounded just as carefree. "That Discord was a real riot," he laughed. "You should've seen how he pulled that stunt right off!"
Rarity and Sweetie Belle pulled up their chairs, eager to hear more.
"This is a story about accidental death, and revenge from beyond the grave," began their mother in a dramatically creepy voice. "It all started on the thirteenth hour, of the thirteenth day, of the thirteenth month."
"Thirteenth month?" asked Sweetie Belle.
"Yep," said her father. "We were at the high school to talk about the misprinted calendars they bought. Everyone went nuts about it!"
"So that places the actual month to January, am I right?" clarified Rarity.
"You've got it, kiddo," commended her mother. "Now where was I? Oh, yeah..."
Rarity's parents shivered as they made their way into the cafeteria. Looking at the calendar, her father groaned, "Brrrr. Crazy Smarch weather... Isn't there a thermostat around here?"
As if in answer to his question, the two of them both noticed the thermostat on the wall. Attached to it was a note. It read, "Do not touch - Discord."
"Hey, good advice," chuckled Rarity's father as he cranked the thermostat all the way up from COOL to WARM, to HOT, and finally to the red area.
Meanwhile, in the boiler room, Groundskeeper Discord was trying on his best suit, admiring himself in the mirror in a generally narcissistic manner.
"Ah, Discord, you dashing devil," he said to his own reflection, straightening his bow tie. "Tonight is the night that you shine. The parents will love you. Nothing beats today's colorful fashion… Hmm?"
Just then, he saw the flames rising up in the furnace –something that struck his attention, as he thought the thermostat had been set to cool. As he walked over to investigate, the furnace suddenly spat out a large fireball as if it were a dragon, with the bulk of it engulfing Discord. Screaming in agony as the flames licked his skin right off, layer by layer, he ran to the door and tried to open it. But alas, it was locked.
Meanwhile, in the cafeteria, Principal Celestia and Vice-Principal Luna were going through items on their budget plan, while the parents were seated at the lunch tables, ready to cast their votes.
"Alright, ladies and gentleman," droned Celestia, "our next budget is... $12 for simple doorknob repairs."
"Nay," all the parents replied.
Meanwhile, back in the boiler room, the knob to the door fell off by itself. Still on fire, a desperate Discord made his way to the fire extinguisher, took it and aimed it at himself.
At the same time, Luna was saying to the parents, "Shall we recharge fire extinguishers? Remember: this is a 100% free service of the fire department."
"Aye," said Rarity's parents in unison.
All the others answered, "Nay."
At that same precise moment, Discord pulled the trigger to the fire extinguisher. All that came out was a tiny amount of dry chemicals.
"Oh, come on!" he groaned.
Finally, in sheer desperation, Discord managed to kick the door down. He ran down the hall, trailing fire all the way, and burst into the cafeteria.
"HELP!" he screamed in anguish as the flames got down to his very bones, burning them to the nth degree. "PLEASE HELP ME!"
"Discord, please," Celestia admonished, paying no attention to the fire. "Wait your turn. Mr. and Mrs. Cake have the floor."
As Discord continued to burn to a crisp, Mr. Cake began to say, "My wife and I would like to see sweets put on the cafeteria menus, just so that the kids will enjoy some nice desert right after lunch."
"Yes, we'd hate to see our Pound and Pumpkin cake disappointed when they come to learn here in C.H.S.!" Mrs. Cake cheerfully added.
Luna, realizing the seriousness of Discord's predicament, looked worried. She whispered to her sister, "Uh, Celestia?"
"Not now, Luna…"
"But don't you think we should've told Discord to just run outside and..."
Suddenly, Discord let out a particularly long, bloodcurdling shriek as an explosion of flames erupted from his body, which collapsed, having been reduced to nothing more than a skeleton.
"...roll out on the snow," Luna finished.
"Remind me to write a new fire drill procedure tomorrow," Celestia flatly replied.
Just then, Discord's charred, immolated skeleton rose and stood up, still alive. Shreds of clothing hung from his bony arms and legs. His shoes were partially tattered. His yellow-red eyes glowed with rage and hatred. And yet, none of the parents were the least bit terrified over a skeleton that still had life in it.
"You shall all pay for this," Discord growled, menacingly, "with your children's lives!"
"Oh, this is rich," Rarity's dad snickered.
"How are you gonna get 'em?" added his wife. "Skeleton power?"
"No, even better! I'll strike where and when you can't save them!" After a dramatic pause, Discord uttered with a wicked grin, "In. Their. Dreams!"
As his demented laughter echoed across the cafeteria, Discord's skeleton then collapsed into a red pile of ashes. Instantly afterward, a nearby dustpan suddenly swept the ashes up and dumped it into the waste bin... by itself, without being held or controlled by anybody.
A long silence ensued, in which everyone exchanged worried glances over the connotations of what had just transpired.
Trying to lighten the mood, Luna nervously laughed, "Well, he always knew how to make a big exit."
"And that is why the whole incident has been covered up in the first place," Rarity said later that evening at Sweet Apple Acres after she and Sweetie Belle told the other girls what their parents just said.
"Not to mention why Discord chased me as a furnace," asserted Sweetie Belle. "It's like he wanted to show me how it felt to be burned."
"Ouch!" groaned Apple Bloom, shivering at the thought.
"I guess we'll just have to cross out 'Wings of Fire' as our next music video," Scootaloo shrugged.
"Girls, do you know what this means?" exclaimed Sunset, getting everyone back on-topic. "The next time we fall asleep, we could..."
"Have a huge party that's bigger than the last Fall Formal?!" interrupted an excited Pinkie.
"No, Pinkie Pie," sighed Sunset, shaking her head. "The next time we fall asleep, we could..." She gulped very weakly before finishing in a low, scared whisper, "die!"
At that point, Granny Smith, the Apple family matriarch who had been half-listening in on the conversation, scoffed, "Heh! Welcome to mah world, young'un!" At that instant, she fell asleep on her rocking chair, snoring loudly.
"But there's something else you need to know about Discord," Sunset began to say, doing her best to move on. "Back where I'm from—in Equestria—he's..."
Then, quite unexpectedly, Pinkie Pie finished in a very fast pace, "…a dragon-horse with the face of a pony, a deer antler on the right, a blue goat horn on the left, a long fang, a snake tongue, a lion's right arm, a eagle's left claw, a lizard's right leg, a goat's left leg, a bat's right wing, a Pegasus's left wing, a horse's mane, a dragon-like tail, and the same white bushy eyebrows, goatee, and eye color as the Discord from this world that can create chaos?"
Sunset was largely taken aback. "How do you know that?!" she gasped.
After a moment's pause, Pinkie Pie smiled innocently, answering, "Just a hunch!"
Later that night, at Sugarcube Corner, Sunset, Rainbow, Fluttershy, Applejack, Pinkie, Rarity, Sweetie Belle, Scootaloo, and Apple Bloom tried hard to stay awake the whole night, desperately hoping to avoid the fate that would await them if they dozed off. Pinkie had eaten more sweets and diet soda than the other girls can count as they all watched Rainbow Dash's TV, which was showing the TV sitcom, I Love Filly.
"We'll be right back to I Love Filly after these messages," said the announcer before the commercial break.
Rainbow started to nod off. This was much later than what she was used to staying up.
"It's no use, girls," Sunset said dejectedly. "We can't keep staying up forever."
"Well, I can!" squealed Pinkie Pie. She gulped down a can of soda and let out a loud, long burp.
Applejack couldn't help but roll her eyes. "How she's able to keep this up is way beyond me."
Rarity, meanwhile, was having a difficult time bearing it all. "I know our lives depend on it and all that," she said, "but poor Sweetie Belle can barely hold her eyes open."
Sweetie Belle raised an eyebrow. "Um… Rarity? I'm actually doing okay."
"Seriously?" gasped Rarity in an overly dramatic way. "It's almost midnight and I can't get my beauty sleep! Somebody must do something!"
"There's only one thing we can do, Rarity," insisted Sunset. "One of us needs to go into our dreams and take out Discord, once and for all."
"Now, hold on there, Sunset!" protested Applejack, wrapping her arms protectively around Apple Bloom. "You ain't suggestin' we send mah little sister, Scootaloo, or Sweetie Belle into deadly dreamland for a gruesome, painful death, are ya?"
"Or Fluttershy?" added an equally worried Rainbow Dash. "She doesn't stand a chance against that psycho!"
"Don't throw yer life away just fer us, partner!" begged Applejack. "You might never go back home to Equestria!"
"I know," sighed Sunset. "Look, I don't want to lose any of you now—especially not this soon after you and Twilight Sparkle saved me from myself. I don't even care if Flash Sentry's hot for Twilight now—I won't let him get hurt again." Her resigned face switched to one of determination and courage, a face that might make Princess Celestia proud. "I know more about Discord than any of you do, having studied him when I was in Equestria. He may be unpredictable, but not unstoppable.
"If giving my life for all of you will make up for how I've screwed up in the past, then so be it."
After a moment of stunned silence, Rarity started to protest. "But you have so much to live for, darling! We've only just gotten to know you and we certainly don't want to lose you, either."
"Yeah, and you still need to pay your rent!" piped in Pinkie.
Sunset slapped a palm onto her face. "Ugh," she groaned. "Don't remind me, Pinkie Pie…"
"And you're still a bit hurt from that rake swipe," Rainbow noted, "unlike me. Not to brag or anything, but I'm much faster and more maneuverable than you are, and I do karate. Discord won't know what him 'im. If there's one thing I know, it's that no one hurts my little sisters and gets away with it!" she asserted heatedly, referring to Fluttershy and Scootaloo. "And I mean no one! That's why I should go!"
"Well, sure," Sunset conceded, "but who'll be there for them if Discord gets you? And who'll lead C.H.S.'s teams to victory, huh? Think about that."
Rainbow's mind ran blank, unable to conjure any counterpoints.
"Wait a minute," chipped in Rarity, "don't shut me out of this! Personally, I'd love to get my hands on that Discord after he messed up my perfect hair! Not to mention what he did to my little sister!" she added, referring to Sweetie Belle.
"Maybe so, Rarity," intoned Applejack, "but Sweetie Belle and yer cat Opal need ya. Remember? Ah can't imagine what'd happen if Discord got the best o' ya. Besides, he done destroyed mah hat and gave Apple Bloom and Big Macintosh a hard time. Ah could go fer some good ol' fashioned payback myself, ya know!"
"See, that's the thing about revenge, Applejack," Sunset pointed out. "It clouds your judgment and your thinking. Don't you realize that the Apple Family needs you? What'll happen if you die? Who'll take care of Apple Bloom? Or wake Granny Smith up when she oversleeps?"
"And what if Big Mac and Fluttershy get married?" Pinkie broke in.
"Pinkie!" Fluttershy snapped as everyone stared her down. Her cheeks were as red as roses.
"Uh... sorry, Fluttershy," smiled Pinkie, embarrassed. "Just thought I'd bring it up, that's all. Anyway, maybe I should go! Besides, anything Discord does to me is worth dying for! More floor buffers means more sparkly outlooks, and more chaos means more chocolate rain and cotton candy clouds!" She finished her sentence with a long squeal of excitement.
"What are you, nuts?!" Sunset snapped. "I'm pretty sure Discord wouldn't be as 'stimulating' with you the next time around. And with how crazy you are, you could end up killing each other, for goodness' sake!" She paused for a bit, her mood starting to change to one of sincerity. "And without you... who'll cheer us all up when we're down, or show everyone else at school the meaning of laughter?"
The only word Pinkie could say to that was, "Shrug."
From this point, the civilized debate degenerated into a quagmire of cross-talk, with each party trying to make a valid point over why they should go, only to be stunned into submission by another counter-point. No one was winning any debate. It was like a courtroom drama.
As this cycle went on, with seemingly no end, Apple Bloom, Scootaloo, and Sweetie Belle looked on, unimpressed.
"Is this their idea of keepin' us awake?" asked Apple Bloom.
Scootaloo shrugged. "Well, it's working so far."
"Ugh!" moaned Sweetie Belle. "I can't take this anymore! Hey, Pinkie Pie! You know where I can find some string and scissors?"
Somehow managing to hear her over the bickering, Pinkie poked up her head. "In the kitchen, center-most cabinet, left-most bottom drawer," she directed. "You can't miss it!" And with one last squeal, she returned to the squabbling.
"Uh, thanks," Sweetie Belle answered nonchalantly as she headed to the kitchen.
That was when Fluttershy took notice. She sneaked out of the argument and followed Sweetie Belle into the kitchen, unable to let her concern stay contained.
"Um... what do you have in mind, Sweetie Belle?"
"If my idea doesn't stop their arguing and let us all go to bed," Sweetie Belle responded flatly, "nothing will."
Two minutes later, Fluttershy and Sweetie Belle, with the latter holding a pair of black strings in her hand, returned to the dining room, with everyone still arguing as impolitely as they had been.
"Um... girls?" Fluttershy said weakly.
But there was no response; Fluttershy's best friends just kept on arguing.
"Try speaking louder," suggested Sweetie Belle.
"Oh, uh, okay. Excuse me? Girls?" she asked again, but to no avail. Her voice, no matter how louder the pitch, was still pretty feeble. She hung her head in defeat.
Sweetie Belle, frustrated, took a deep breath and yelled out in a loud, cracking voice, "WILL YOU ALL JUST SHUT UP ALREADY?!"
Needlessly to say, this yelled statement startled everyone, causing them to jump and turn to face Sweetie Belle, effectively ending the argument. "Thank you," she smiled innocently.
"Sweetie Belle," said Rarity, mildly annoyed, "would you at least give us a warning before shouting out like that? It's simply not ladylike."
"Sorry, Rarity, I kinda lost it for a second," uttered Sweetie Belle, sheepishly. She made a little cough before getting down to business. "Anyway, if you all want to go into dreamland and spare the other from a grisly fate, why not simply draw a string?" She held out every single string in her hand. "I cut it into five pieces. Whoever gets the shortest string wins."
This idea suddenly garnered heaps of praise from almost everyone. Sunset just looked from girl to girl, absolutely astounded by their reactions.
"I... suppose that could work," Fluttershy spoke, unable to find any other ideas.
"Totally!" affirmed Rainbow.
"That's brilliant, Sweetie Belle!" commended Apple Bloom.
"We always said you were the genius of the group," smiled Scootaloo.
Sweetie Belle beamed. "Dad always said I had talent."
"Why, what a fascinating idea, Sweetie Belle!" Rarity proclaimed as she pinched Sweetie Belle's cheek with affection. "I don't know what I'd do without you!"
Scootaloo and Apple Bloom barely held in their laughter as Sweetie Belle blushed.
"I think we should give this a try," proposed Rarity. "What do you say?"
"Well, darn tootin'!" proclaimed Applejack. "Count me in!"
"Me too!" agreed Rainbow.
"Me three!" squealed Pinkie Pie.
Sunset hesitated momentarily, still unsure. But she finally decided, "I don't see why not. Alright, let's do it!"
With Apple Bloom and Scootaloo watching in anticipation, and Fluttershy shivering in fear behind them, Sweetie Belle placed her hand down on the table in front of everyone. Pinkie, Sunset, Applejack, Rainbow, and Rarity each pulled a string from her hand. They carefully eyed the little threads, comparing their separate lengths.
After several seconds, Pinkie was the first to back down. "Oh, bummer!" she groaned. "I got the longest string."
Everyone around her breathed a sigh of relief.
"What's so good about that?" she sulked. "I'll never get the chance to show Discord my party know-how! That's no fun!"
"Movin' on," Rainbow muttered.
Rarity had just finished assessing the length of Applejack's string. "Well, Applejack," she said, I can safely say that you have the second-to-last longest strong! You won't need to face Discord, after all!"
"Land sakes, Rarity!" Applejack replied, returning the feeling. "Yer string's a little shorter than mine! Way to go!"
As Rarity and Applejack high-fived, Sweetie Belle and Apple Bloom rushed up to them and hugged them, happy that they wouldn't have to run the risk of losing their big sisters.
Sunset and Rainbow then exchanged nervous glances with the other girls, knowing that it would be one of them who had to face Groundskeeper Discord. They laid their strings on the table next to each other vertically and Sunset took out a ruler to measure Rainbow's filament.
It only took one-and-a-half seconds to come up with a result.
"Alright, Rainbow Dash, your string is just five inches and seven centimeters long."
"How'd you get that done so quickly?" asked an astonished Rainbow.
"I used to study under a Princess. Remember?"
Without bothering to look at Rainbow as she spoke, Sunset proceeded to measure her own string.
Egghead, thought Rainbow derisively.
Suddenly, Sunset stopped dead. Her eyes widened in shock. She stared at her string before switching to Rainbow's and back again.
"Wait, this can't be right!"
"What? What is it, Sunset?" asked a worried-looking Fluttershy.
"Don't keep us in suspense!" Rainbow Dash insisted. "How long's your string?!"
Leaning back on her seat, Sunset turned to gaze at Rainbow Dash, and she replied morbidly, "Five inches and... seven centimeters."
At that instant, the room was suddenly filled by the eerie sound of a pipe organ. For a second, the shock of the girls' predicament kept them from noticing. But then, they turned to look at Rainbow's TV, which was showing an old black-and-white movie. The current scene depicted a man wearing a black cloak and a face mask playing the very organ the girls were hearing.
Rainbow quickly turned off the TV. "Man, I hate opera!" she complained.
A distraught Sweetie Belle banged her fists on the table. "Oh, why didn't I check the strings before I had them drawn?!"
"Don't you fret, darling," Rarity smiled, placing a hand on Sweetie Belle's shoulder. "You just haven't learned algebra yet."
"Yeah, well, I'm pretty slow at math myself," admitted Pinkie, grinning with a little "squee" in the background.
Rainbow, unable to think of any alternative, turned to her friend with the red and yellow hair. "Looks like it's you and me, Sunset," she stated.
Sunset suddenly became genuinely scared—scared for Rainbow's life, scared of how mangled she may end up at the hands of Groundskeeper Discord. "Rainbow Dash, please," she implored. "I don't want to see you end up like Trixie!"
"You won't," promised Rainbow, holding Sunset's hand. Then, her face turned downright serious before she showed her loyalty. "And don't try to talk me out of it. No way am I gonna let one of my best friends face Discord alone. We'll stand a better chance if we just work together: two of us against one of him."
Slowly, but surely, Sunset became convinced. "Come to think of it," she thought aloud, "I've heard of the old saying, 'divide and conquer.'"
"Now you're talking!" exclaimed Rainbow Dash as she gave Sunset a hearty slap on the back. "Let's go kick some Groundskeeper tail!"
"TEAM SPIRIT!" Pinkie Pie cried out as she held up a pair of cheerleaders' pom-poms, looking to join in the moment.
Without acknowledging Pinkie, Sunset rubbed her back and turned to the others. "Girls, we need you to stay awake. If it looks like we're in any trouble, just wake us up."
"Y'all got it, sugar cube!" promised Applejack.
"You can count on us!" affirmed Rarity.
"Uh-huh!" answered Apple Bloom, Scootaloo, and Sweetie Belle, nodding.
Fluttershy, being the nervous wreck that she always was, timidly asked Rainbow, "Promise you won't be grouchy?"
"Aw, no sweat, Fluttershy," assured Rainbow as she pulled her closet childhood friend in for a gentle hug. "I'm not gonna get crabby... as long as nobody's gonna be using megaphones."
With this statement, everyone turned to look at Pinkie. In her hand was a megaphone that she had planned on using to wake Rainbow and Sunset up, if the need ever arose. She just started at the other girls blankly for a few seconds before she realized what they were referring to.
"Um... what megaphone?" she smiled awkwardly as she threw the megaphone back over her shoulder.
With that out of the way, Sunset looked at her circle of friend with a warm grin, her eyes beginning to well up. "Thanks, girls. You're the best." She and Rainbow were then smudged by an artillery of hugs from one friend to the next, each of them wishing them will, knowing that this may very well end up being the last they ever saw of them.
"Good luck out there in dreamland," Applejack said, "Y'all gonna need it."
Sunset gave a little frown, unconvinced. "Uh, I think we're gonna need a lot more than just luck, A.J. But thanks, anyway."
"Are you sure you don't want me to use my megaphone, Dashie?" asked Pinkie.
Rainbow Dash said nothing. She simply shot the pink party girl down with an angry, cold-hearted stare that did all of her talking for her in this instance.
"Okay, just checking," shrugged Pinkie.
"Ready, Rainbow?" asked Sunset.
"You got it, Sunset!" replied Rainbow Dash, giving her own personal thumbs up.
Ready to march into battle, the two girls yawned, stretched their arms, sat back down in their seats and rested their heads on the tables—but not before Rarity slipped a pillow for each of them to lay their noggins on.
Sweetie Belle, Pinkie, Scootaloo, Fluttershy, and the Apple sisters looked at Rarity with raised eyebrows.
"What?" Rarity asked incredulously as Rainbow and Sunset drifted off to sleep. "You didn't expect me to let them sleep on the cold, hard table, did you?"
After what seemed like only a brief moment, Sunset and Rainbow opened their eyes to find themselves in what would most certainly be a realm within their dreams. Hence, this would be where their final ultimate confrontation with Groundskeeper Discord would be contested.
They were at the front entrance of C.H.S. The building was untouched. Turning around, they found the horse statue that served as a portal to Equestria every thirty moons in the same condition.
Nonetheless, as the two stood to their feet, Sunset couldn't help but notice something that was not right: a telltale sign that they were indeed in dreamland. "Do you notice something... different around here?" she asked.
Rainbow took a moment to survey the immediate area and she did indeed notice something different (so she claimed, anyway). "Bushes and grass look like they could use a trim. I see a few weeds poking outta the walkway. No wonder we need a groundskeeper. Almost makes me wanna miss Discord." She smiled in satisfaction. "Not much has changed around the school for this dream. We're in the clear."
However, that was not what Sunset was referring to. "Um," she said haltingly, pointing out a shaky arm."I think you might want to take a look at the whole town, Rainbow Dash."
Rainbow turned her head to the direction Sunset was indicating. She gasped. Something was indeed different. Something much more so than what she thought at first.
Where the town of Canterlot had been, it was now replaced by a gigantic golf course. There were no roads, no sidewalks, no houses, no shops, no streetlights, no cars, no traffic lights, and especially no people, except the girls. Everywhere they looked, there only existed teeing areas, bent grass set up as fairways and roughs, water hazards, sand traps, putting greens, flagsticks in the holes, and a couple of garden houses protruding from the grass. The trees, large hedges, and shrubberies served as the surrounding greenery. Ten golf carts were parked just a few feet from the school, waiting to be driven.
"I guess the kids were right," acknowledged Sunset. "Discord sure loved to play golf."
The mere mention of that last word suddenly got Rainbow fuming as if she were a stick of TNT about to explode. "Golf, golf, golf!" she yelled. "I hate golf! My folks always drag me to this boring country club on the weekends! I have to wait in the cart and watch them play the lamest excuse for a sport! 'Golf's not so bad,' they say. 'It could be fun,' they say. 'Give it a try, Dashie,' they say. 'You'll love it,' they say!"
"Come on, Rainbow," Sunset insisted. "Golf does have some benefits, like burning calories, stress relief, using creativity, and... Well, you could meet new people."
But Rainbow, reluctant to heed any of those words, simply crossed her arm. "I'll start playing golf when pigs fly!"
As if on cue, a flock of pigs suddenly flew past the two like a flock of birds, except that they were oinking, instead of tweeting. To make things more ironic, one little piglet even stopped to lick the stunned Rainbow on the cheek before rejoining its family.
Rainbow wiped the saliva off of her cheek. "Sunset, if we live through this..."
"Yeah, golfing lessons can wait," replied Sunset. "Now come on."
As the girls walked across the giant golf course, a myriad of strange and wacky things appeared before they eyes; things that would otherwise probably only be seen while high on marijuana or LSD. Buffalo wore ballet dresses and were doing that very dance on two legs. Colonies of bunnies were running around with elongated legs. Bats were digging holes under the ground, instead of flying in the sky. Squirrels swam on top of the water as if they were ducks.
Most astonishing of all, the sky was changing from day to night and back again every ten seconds.
"What the hay's going on here?" asked a perplexed Rainbow. "Why's everything all wacky all of a sudden?"
"It's chaos, Rainbow Dash," Sunset explained grimly. "This is how Discord rules his domain. Without a single trace of harmony."
"Well, that explains the animals around here," Rainbow reasoned.
"Animals are only half the things he can corrupt," intoned Sunset. "We'll need to be careful."
As soon as she finished speaking, a wet brown drop landed on Rainbow's nose, almost as if a bird had just left a deposit from above, as birds are known for doing.
"Huh?" Cautiously, she wiped the small object off and smelled it. Fortunately it wasn't bird droppings. It was something much more pleasant-smelling. "Hey, it's chocolate!"
"Chocolate?" Sunset paused, a look of unease showing in her face. "You don't think...?"
Before she could finish her thoughts, both girls were being pelted by large amount of chocolate rain, which fell from clouds of pink cotton candy. Their clothes were stained within seconds. Liquid chocolate dripped from their hair as the rain suddenly ceased; it seemed like no sooner than the rains came that the chocolate raindrops simply vanished on their way down, leaving the sky crystal-clear once more.
"Wow, and the schoolbooks said it couldn't be here again." Needless to say, Rainbow was clearly annoyed a good deal. "Don't mention this to Pinkie Pie. Ever."
"Once we've stopped Discord from killing more kids, we won't need to," assured Sunset as she drenched her skirt, which had been soaked all the way through with chocolate. "For goodness' sake, I just had this dry-cleaned."
"Worrying over clothes is Rarity's department, Sunset." Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes. "Don't take her job."
"Uh, yeah, whatever," Sunset replied, getting herself and Rainbow focused back on the task at hand. "We can't be far now."
And so the girls trudged on. As they walked gingerly beside the hedges, it began to get cold. They embraced themselves as they shivered, but struggled on.
"H-h-h-h-hey..." Rainbow stammered, feeling ready to come down with hypothermia. "If we're out on a n-n-n-n-n-n-nice sunny day, why has it d-d-d-d-d-d-dropped to f-f-f-f-f-f-fifty below all of a s-s-s-s-s-s-s-sudden?" Cold white vapor escaped from her mouth as she spoke.
"He's close," Sunset intoned as her eyes narrowed to slits, trying to shield themselves from the burning cold. "I can feel it."
"Y-y-y-y-y-you're not kidding?" stuttered Rainbow. "Well, let's s-s-s-s-s-s-s-s-see if you're r-r-r-r-r-right." With that, her shivering gave way to a loud, challenging voice; she clenched her fists as she spoke, "Alright, Discord! We know you're out there! Come and get us, you sicko!"
Even as Sunset tried to shush her, Rainbow's words echoed throughout the golf course. Rabbits scattered in all directions. Flying pigs took cover in the trees. Squirrels broke from their surface swimming and dived deeper underwater. Bats dug tunnels in a hurry, leaving behind signs that read "DO NOT DISTURB."
"Rainbow Dash, are you crazy?!" Sunset whispered hoarsely.
"Just wanted to drag him out into the open."
Sure enough, before Sunset could retort, a faint tan-nan-nan-nan-nan-nan caught her attention.
"What was that?" she gasped as she looked frantically from left to right, searching for the source of the sound.
"Huh?
"I thought I heard a... motor running."
Rainbow Dash looked around back at the school. "But all the carts are still parked," she observed. "I don't see one of them missing."
Suddenly, the motor noise came again, causing the girls to jump.
"Where's that coming from?!" Rainbow gasped, now being able to hear the sound.
"I don't know, but it's getting louder and..." Before Sunset could finish her sentence, Discord's crazed laugh suddenly rang out from behind the hedges, a sinister echo accompanying its tone. "Rainbow, look out!"
No sooner had Sunset thrown herself onto Rainbow, pushing her out of the way, when Discord, his large head atop a multicolored machine—a mix between lawn mower and a tractor—plowed through the hedge the girls had just cleared. At his front were fierce-looking sickles, which acted both as a plow and fingers.
"Thanks, Sunset," said Rainbow as Sunset helped her back up to her feet.
"Save the thanks for when we get outta here alive," Sunset replied.
"Oh, I'm sorry, ladies," said Discord in a mock-apologetic tone. "Did I startle you? I should've yelled out 'four.'" He snickered maniacally as he roared his engine.
"Rainbow, remember when I said 'divide and conquer?' asked Sunset.
"Yeah. Why?"
"I think now's the best time to do that."
"You don't have to tell me twice!" affirmed Rainbow. "Let's split!"
And so they did. Rainbow took the left side of the golf course, while Sunset took the right.
"I'm going to have fun with this," Discord hissed with a twisted smile. Shifting gears, he drove down the hill, laughing viciously all the way.
Sunset hid in the bushes near Hole 5. Though she quivered like a little girl, she kept quiet as Discord patrolled the vicinity.
"Oh, Sunset...! Rainbow Dash...!" Discord taunted in a singsong tone of voice. "Where are you...? Come out, come out, wherever you are..."
Rainbow sat behind the sloping hill that hosted Hole 14. She only dared to take a peek at Discord before ducking back down.
As for Discord, he spoke in an amplified voice as he passed by Hole 7, his mockery aimed at Sunset. "Did you really think you were the one ruling Canterlot High, Sunny dear? I'd been ruling there long before you came from Equestria. No one was a far better dresser than moi. At least I didn't need to win a Princess' crown to gain that much popularity."
Sunset was paying no heed to this taunting. Come on, girl. Think. Think. What would Twilight do? Peering through the leaves, she noticed a large sand trap in the sixteenth fairway. A long garden hose was attached a few meters away from it. A bag of grass clippings stuck out from a garbage canister at the second teeing area.
That gave Sunset an idea. When Discord was far away and too conceited to notice, she sneaked out of the bushes and then ran for the disposed bag as fast as she could.
"Ah, if only you could be as dead as I am now," lavished Discord. "It's certainly made me a lot happier."
"Oh, and Dashie?" Discord jabbed as he moved away from Hole 13. "You were lucky to escape me without so much of a scratch. I had no idea Fluttershy had such a high voice. Imagine how much higher I can make it the next time we meet." He gave off a ominous laugh.
Rainbow furrowed her eyeballs with rage upon hearing those words. Her mouth opened, showing her gnashed teeth. And that was when Discord made the statement that pushed Rainbow Dash off the edge.
"By the way, when I'm done playing with you, I think I'll pay Soarin' a visit... with my sickles."
At that moment, Rainbow sprang from her hiding place and lunged at Discord. "STAY AWAY FROM HIM, YOU FREAK!" she bellowed as she flew at him, ready to dish out some punishment. But then, all of a sudden, Discord's mower-tractor body transformed into some sort of ten-foot-tall robot, stopping Rainbow in her charge. "Aw crud," she murmured.
"Time to make this game even more interesting," Discord sneered. Producing a blaster from his right arm, he locked on target. Then, he fired.
Rainbow dodged the shot just in time, resulting in a scorching hole on the putting green.
"D'oh!" snapped a frustrated Discord. "You made me create a divot!"
"Guess that affects your scoring, pal!" mocked Rainbow as she blew raspberries at him.
Seething in anger, Discord resumed shooting, chasing Rainbow all the way to the next hole. No matter how hard he tried, Rainbow was just running too fast for him to get a lock on her. More divots were being made, the Hole 15 flagstick had been shot off, and one blaster bolt went into the lake.
"Why. Won't. You. Just. Hold. STILL?!" he growled as he continued to shoot and miss.
"Hey, lawn boy!"
"Huh?" Discord swiveled around to his right. He didn't need to guess who called out to him.
"You missed a spot!" Sunset motioned to a long section of uncut grass, which she was standing in front of, near Hole 16. "Hope your boss doesn't dock you a few bucks for this!" she teased.
His temper rising higher, Discord swiftly changed back to transport mode. "When I get through with you," he thundered as he bore his sickles at the ready, "they'll have to do a fine compost-mortem! Oh, I crack myself up." He shifted into high gear and floored on the gas, flying right towards Sunset at full speed.
"Sunset, what are you doing?!" Rainbow gasped. "Get outta there!"
But Sunset didn't as much as move a muscle. She just stood there, staring defiantly at Discord as he came closer... and closer... and closer...
"Sunset?! SUNSET!" Rainbow thought for certain that this was the end for her new friend, that she would suffer a grisly death in this dream, and thus a grisly death for real...
But suddenly, as Discord came within inches of Sunset, he could move no further. His wheels spun helplessly. Bits of grass flew from the untrimmed bed, revealing the disguised sand trap. Because water had been mixed with the sand, it was impossible to get out.
"What? No! Not the sand trap!" Desperately, Discord morphed into several different sorts of multicolor flying forms to escape—a Pteranodon, a rocket, a jet plane—but it was no good. The more he struggled, the faster he sank. So he just gave up and reverted to his original human form. "Why does it always have to be the sand traps?!" he whined, the sand sucking him down at waist level.
"You've lost, Discord," Sunset smirked, triumph flowing through her veins. "I guess you could say I set up a hole... in one."
All Discord could do as he sank into the sand was sigh in bitter defeat. "Well played, Sunset," he said. "A perfect par. For that, I salute you." As he did so, his head and right arm disappeared into the sand below. The only things that surfaced were a packet of small bubbles.
Watching the whole progress unravel before her eyes, Rainbow ran up to Sunset and pulled her in for a big hug, squeezing her so hard that she thought her ribs might break. "Sunset, that was so awesome!" she exclaimed. "I can't believe you managed to outsmart that creep! Not bad… for an egghead." She winked.
"I just had to improve somehow, Rainbow Dash," Sunset replied modestly. "You did pretty good with outpacing Discord yourself."
"Comes with being an athlete." Rainbow then turned to a concerned face. "Next time, warn me about what you're planning before you have me go scaring me like that."
"I'll try to remember that. I promise." After a moment's pause, she looked at her friend, showing a very inquisitive, curious look. "Rainbow Dash?"
"Yeah?"
"Who's Soarin'?"
Rainbow looked away nervously, her cheeks giving off a shade of red. "Uh, nobody?" she said, dishonesty shading her voice.
"Is he like your... pet?" Sunset asked.
Rainbow scoffed. "Don't make me laugh!"
"Oh, I get it!" sneered Sunset, as realization dawned on her. "So he must some sort of boy, right?"
Rainbow hesitated, her pupils darting right to left.
"Well, I'm waiting," Sunset teased.
Breathing a heavy sigh, Rainbow let it all out. "He's a freshman at Cloudsdale University."
"Cloudsdale University?!" Sunset gasped excitedly. Pulling Rainbow by the coat collar, she hastily demanded, "You have got to show me that place! Tell me how big their library is! What their colors are! What teams they have!"
She then stopped herself for a moment, absolutely stumped. Then she looked at Rainbow, bearing a smug smile. "You've got a crush on that boy, don't you, Rainbow Dash?"
Her face redder than ever, Rainbow pushed Sunset off her. "I do not!"
"Deny all you like, R.D," Sunset said haughtily, "but I dated Flash Sentry long enough to know when love's in the air."
"I'm not denying anything!" Rainbow protested.
"There, you see? You're doing it again," jabbed Sunset. She watched as all Rainbow could do was groan in frustration.
While the girls argued, Discord, now a giant octopus formed from balloons of his various suit colors, slowly rose from the sand trap behind them. A gray balloon formed his head. He smiled his most sickening smile ever...
Meanwhile, Sunset had gotten Rainbow to admit to indeed having certain feelings for this certain Soarin'. "Having a crush isn't such a bad thing," she reassured her.
Rainbow growled. "If you ever say one word about this to the girls—and I mean any of them..."
"Relax," smiled Sunset kindly. "My lips are sealed."
"Thanks," said Rainbow, sighing in relief.
Sunset shrugged in a playful manner. "Hey, what are friends for?"
At that precise moment, Discord suddenly thrust out his front tentacles at the girls. He grabbed them before they had a chance to react. The girls screamed with surprise and terror as they were dragged out into midair, the balloon arms wrapping tightly around them.
"I gotta admit, Sunset, you really had me there for a few seconds," Discord snickered. "But I just remembered something: you can't kill what's already dead!" He cackled in bemusement. "Looks like the joke's on you, huh?"
"Ugh," Rainbow groaned under her breath. "I'm really getting tired of this guy."
"Girls?" Sunset called out. "We could use a little help here!"
Abruptly, Rarity, Pinkie, Applejack, Apple Bloom, Scootaloo, and Fluttershy came up running to the sand trap. "Wow!" exclaimed an elated Pinkie. "Is that Discord acting as a gigantic balloon? Gotta try that in my dreams sometime!"
That was when the girls noticed Rainbow and Sunset's predicament. "Oh no!" squeaked Fluttershy. "Rainbow Dash! Sunset! You're in trouble!"
"Wake up, y'all!" urged Applejack.
Rainbow turned her eyes and gaped as she saw the girl she loved as a sister. "What the... Fluttershy?"
"Wait a sec..." reasoned Sunset, letting the sudden appearance of her other friends into her mind. "If you're here with us, then you all must've fallen asleep too!"
"Oh, don't be ridiculous, Sunset!" Rarity snapped indignantly. "I, for one, am not asleep. I just happen to be resting my eye..."
She stopped as realization dawned on her and the others on the ground.
"Uh oh!" they all echoed. One second later, they were hoisted away by Discord's empty tentacles as the madman continued sinking into the sand.
Meanwhile, in Sugarcube Corner, Sweetie Belle was the only one in the group still awake. She sighed in derision upon noticing that her sister Rarity and all the others had fallen asleep.
"Well, I guess it's up to me... again."
Back in the nightmare realm, Discord was drawing his would-be victims ever closer to the sand. "Thanks to these special powers I've been granted by good old Beezlebub," he hissed, "my kind of balloons are extremely tough on the outside. Even if you've brought pins with you—which you obviously don't—you won't be able to pop your way out."
"No kiddin'," whimpered Apple Bloom, wincing. She could feel the strength of steel-like rubber.
Scootaloo likewise had trouble with breaking free. "You could... lighten up... on the grip," she said as she struggled.
A snicker escaped Discord's mouth. "Fat chance of that ever happening, kiddo."
It was at that point that Sunset gave up all hope. In her eyes, there was no conceivable way that any of them could wriggle their way out of this mess, and she sincerely felt that the end was near.
"Goodbye, girls," she uttered in defeat. "I'm so happy to have had great friends like you."
"Yeah. Friends that I hope will be resurrected as people who can stay awake for half-an-hour!" Rainbow Dash snapped in an irritated tone. "Not that I blame you, Fluttershy."
"Thank you, big sis," came the weak reply.
"See you round, Rainbow Dash," Scootaloo sighed sadly. "Wish we spent more time together."
"Yeah. Same here, Squirt." Rainbow lowered her head in remorse.
Then, just when the girls had all accepted their fates, an innocent child with a hairstyle almost as curly as Rarity's stood behind Discord. Sweetie Belle, who had fallen to sleep and entered the dream to save her friends and big sister, jumped forwards toward her foe, latching her fingers onto the rubbery surface of his balloon head. She slowly made her way to the top. There, she found a knotted neck.
Eyes burning with determination, she started to untie Discord's one weak spot.
"Remember, ladies!" Discord sneered as the girls were brought even closer to their fates. "It's not the submersion!" He paused to let his voice drop to a dramatically low pitch. "It's the sudden lack of air…" The sound of his psychotic laughter then roared loudly across the land.
"Laugh this off, Discord!" Holding the loose balloon neck with both hands, Sweetie Belle took one big breath and blew into the lip with all her might.
Almost immediately, Discord felt his body expanding. The increased pressure from within caused him to release the girls, who landed safely on the grass. Overwhelmed by panic, he tried in vain to get Sweetie Belle off him, but his tentacles grew stubbier by the second.
"Everyone better cover your ears! It's gonna be a loud one!"
Once the girls all did as Pinkie instructed, Discord had reached his limit. "Kids these days," he grumbled.
And with a deafening pop, the menacing form of Discord was gone. Colorful bits of balloons—all that remained of the homicidal maniac—rained all over the place, no longer a threat to the girls or anyone else.
The force of the explosion literally sent Sunset, Rainbow, Applejack, Rarity, Pinkie, Fluttershy, Apple Bloom, Sweetie Belle, and Scootaloo up into space. What happened next could've most certainly otherwise happened only while high on mescaline: they orbited around the moon for one cycle, admiring its crater-covered surface, before settling down to a diner's table that just quite literally popped up from out of nowhere. A split-second later, before they could even order anything to drink, they woke up.
They were back in Sugarcube Corner. Every single one of them.
"Wow!" Pinkie blurted out. "What a rush! Let's do that again!"
"How about we don't?" Applejack replied flatly.
With that little irrelevant outburst out of the way, everyone then proceeded to reap huge amounts of praise on the individual who had just saved all of their flanks.
"You did it, Sweetie Belle!" exclaimed Sunset.
"Oh, I'm sooooooo proud of you!" beamed Rarity as she firmly hugged her little sister.
"Thanks, Rarity," giggled Sweetie Belle. Her cheeks burned up like mad.
"Man, I wish we had the whole thing on tape!" marveled Scootaloo.
"It would've been something to bring fer Show and Tell," agreed Apple Bloom.
Sweetie Belle blushed uncontrollably. "Please, girls! Enough with the extra attention!"
That was when Fluttershy realized something important. "Oh my... I guess Discord wasn't kidding when he said his balloons were tough on the outside."
"Yeah, but with all the hot air," Rainbow jabbed, "he never guessed how soft he was on the inside!"
The whole gang howled with laughter.
The next morning, the girls stepped out of the shop and onto the clear street sidewalk. The sun was shining, the sky was blue, birds were singing, and the roads were clear.
Applejack breathed a sigh of relief and contentment. "Looks like everythin's back to the way it should be."
"Yep," replied Rainbow. "No more undead Groundskeepers to give us any trouble."
Sunset, on the other hand, wasn't convinced. "I don't know, girls," she said. "Something tells me that we haven't seen the last of Discord."
"Huh?" The rest of the gang looked at her with disbelief.
"I know that it sounds crazy, but he could come back in any form, at any time, and at any place. Kill us in ways we can't even imagine!"
Just then, a bus pulled up on the other side of the street. A man wearing a long black overcoat and pork pie hat hopped off. Positioning himself it the middle of the road, he removed his hat, revealing a very familiar face with an all-too-familiar grin.
Groundskeeper Discord, while having supposedly being killed in the world of dreams, was still alive for real. "I'm baaaaaaaack," he proclaimed in a singsong voice. As he let out a high-pitched laugh, the bus started to leave. He looked in its direction, his face washed with apprehension.
"Hey! Hold on a moment! Stop!" He let out a long dismal moan. "For the love of Sapphire Shores, I left my Tommy gun on the back seat!" He started to run after the bus, then stopped abruptly and looked at the girls. "Wait here, ladies," he advised. "I'll be right back." Replacing his hat, he resumed the chase, losing his left dress shoe in the process. "Oh, jeez!"
The girls stared blankly as Discord and the bus disappeared from sight. They were utterly speechless.
"I like him!" Pinkie Pie giggled, breaking the awkward silence. "He's silly!"