An Apple Sutra
Life went on in the sleepy village of Ponyville, the same as it always had.
Apple Bloom didn’t mind the early morning deliveries. That’s what made Ponyville particularly sleepy at the moment – a lot of ponies preferred to stay in bed, if given the chance. Heck, she knew from experience that Scootaloo was liable to nap all day if someone didn’t wake her up, a habit that mirrored her unofficial big sister’s own laziness.
But this had always been Apple Bloom’s favorite time of the day – the sun barely peeking over the trees on the horizon, the quiet only broken by the sound of birds beginning to wake, the cool chill of the night lingering in the air. It was still, in a way that you didn’t get that often, even in a smaller town like Ponyville.
It put a spring in her step as she made her way down the dirt path into town, and she smiled to herself, enjoying the simplicity of the journey. Even the wooden box on her back didn't feel like much of a burden. The occasional clink of the glass jars inside was a reminder to be careful with her cargo, but she had made this trip often enough that keeping it balanced was an automatic instinct.
At this rate, she was going to be early to school, as usual, and that was even with having to stop clear across town. Her smile shifted, falling into a more resigned expression as her destination came into view: Barnyard Bargains, the town’s biggest and most modern general store.
It was a bit of an unpleasant reminder that the rest of her day wasn’t guaranteed to be quite this simple and carefree. It brought up certain associations with certain ponies. Not Mr. Rich, who had always seemed decent enough, and who Applejack said was fair in all his dealings with their family. But on the other hoof, his rotten little brat of a filly... That girl that seemed to make it her personal goal in life to cause Apple Bloom trouble.
Diamond Tiara shoulda had a ‘being-a-stuck-up-jerk’ cutie mark, that’s all Apple Bloom was saying. Maybe that was what a tiara stood for in the first place.
Apple Bloom puffed her cheeks out and growled, annoyed that the thought of her tormenter had annoyed her, frustrated with being thrown off her groove so soon. She shook her head. She wouldn’t let DT bring her down. She still had a good amount of time to enjoy the morning, to—
She blinked.
There, sitting in front of Barnyard Bargains, was a funny-looking creature.
Barnyard Bargains opened early, but that wasn’t supposed to be for another thirty minutes. And even then, it’s not like they saw much business at this time of the day. It was downright odd for somepony to be sitting outside. Who would be waiting?
...What would be waiting?
Apple Bloom slowed down as she drew closer, until she came to a complete stop in front of the store. The creature didn’t move a muscle. She would have thought it was dead, if its fuzzy chest wasn’t moving ever so slightly as it breathed. Her eyes darted between the creature and the doors, and she noticed one of the cashiers behind the glass desperately waving for her to come inside.
Bloom shrugged, feeling the box on her back settle securely, and trotted up. As soon as the door was opened a crack, a pair of hooves grabbed her and whisked her inside. Before she knew it, she was hustled behind a checkout counter, a light-green mare holding her tightly as another stallion wryly observed them with his forelegs crossed.
“Oh, Apple Bloom!” Honeydew said. “Are you alright? Are you hurt?”
Apple Bloom irritably brushed away the hooves patting all over her and squared her shoulders up. Mr. Bottlecap got the idea and trotted up to take the box from her. “There’s one delivery of zap apple jam for y’all. Now—”
“You’re so brave!”
Apple Bloom stopped, her mouth open. “What?”
“To walk right past that— that— thing.”
“Ah was gonna ask about that,” she said. She took one look at Honeydew’s wide eyes and turned to Bottlecap instead. “Who’s that out front, now?”
He sniffed. “Don’t rightly know. S’been there since I came in this morning to check the stock. Never seen a pony like—”
“A monster,” Honeydew hissed.
He turned slightly, but Apple Bloom still saw as he rolled his eyes. “Like I was saying, never seen a pony like that. Hasn’t really done anything though, as far as I can tell.”
Honeydew stared up at him. “You’ve got to do something.”
“I called the police, don’t worry. They said they’d send someone over in a bit.”
Apple Bloom frowned. “Have ya tried talking to it?”
Both ponies stared at her, Honeydew with barely-contained fright and Bottlecap with a more patronizing disdain.
“Police will handle it,” he said.
“What’s it done wrong?” Apple Bloom asked. “Who’s it hurting? What’s your problem with it? Or her, or him, Ah guess.”
He shrugged, and one hoof wagged in Honeydew’s direction. “Scaring off customers. Probably. And loitering on our property.”
Apple Bloom’s eyebrows drew close together. “No it ain't! Y'all don't even have customers yet!”
“Look,” he said wearily. “Why don’t you run along to school and let the adults handle it?”
“Now hold on. I—”
“Apple Bloom.” From the tone of his voice, he wasn’t interested in continuing the conversation.
Apple Bloom gritted her teeth and stormed out, kicking her hooves against the tile floor as she went. As she burst out into the suddenly less-comforting morning and slammed the door behind her, she realized it had probably come across more as a kid’s tantrum than a righteous fury.
The anger bled from her as she sighed out deeply. That wasn’t gonna help anypony. But what could she do?
Her mouth firmed up into a smirk. She could try and talk to the funny thing, that was what.
She trotted over, staying a safe distance away but trying to get a good look. It certainly wasn’t a pony, but it was far more equine than not. The biggest difference was its neck, standing a good double the size of any pony’s. It was sitting down strangely, its hind legs twisted up in some uncomfortable-looking way, while its back remained ramrod straight. But even seated on the concrete sidewalk it still stood a good head taller than Bloom. Its white coat was also quite different, thicker and fluffier than usual, to the point that she figured it’d have to get pretty hot during the summer in all that fur. From the shape of its muzzle, Apple Bloom figured it probably was a ‘him’. She leaned in closer, her eyes squinting.
“Can I help you?” he said, the voice deep and with a languid accent strange to her ears.
She just about fell over in surprise. “Oh. Um. Sorry! Ah didn’t mean to wake ya up or anything.”
One eyelid cracked open, revealing a surprisingly bright blue eye that sharply studied her. “Do not be concerned. I was simply meditating.”
Apple Bloom’s nose crinkled. “Meditating? Ah thought Sweetie Belle told me once that’s what Rarity says she’s doin’ when she’s too tired for yoga and wants to take a nap instead.”
A sudden weird rumbling sound caused Bloom to take a step back in alarm, but she realized it was the creature chuckling. The other eye opened and a warm smile spread across his face. “This Sweetie Belle seems quite astute.”
Apple Bloom warily nodded. “Sure. She’s kinda smart too.”
“Tell me, young pony. What is your name?”
“Apple Bloom. Nice to meetcha.” She trotted up and stuck one hoof out. The creature’s brows furrowed as it studied her for a long moment, and then he inclined his head to look down at her outstretched limb. She wiggled her hoof a bit and he tentatively brought his up to meet hers.
Shrugging, she shook his hoof heartily, just like Applejack had always taught her. When she let go, he looked a little dizzy. But that just meant she had done it right.
“And what’s yours?” she asked.
He blinked a few times and then focused on her again. “Oh. Yes. In the tongue of my people, I am knows as ‘Walking mindfully the middle path’, but I know that is somewhat awkward. Most ponies choose to call me—”
“Oh, Ah know!” she chirped. “Ah can just call ya Mr. Walky!”
An eyebrow raised, though the smile across his muzzle didn’t falter. “Then shall it be so, Little Apple.”
Her eyes narrowed and she opened her mouth to protest, then caught the glint of amusement in his eye and decided on a different route. “So, Mr. Walky, what kind ‘a— Uh, that is, when you say your people ya mean—” She bit her lip, trying to figure out how to phrase her question without offending.
He took a bit of pity on her distress. “I’m a llama, if that was your inquiry.”
“A llama!” She grinned. “Of course! Ah just ain’t ever seen one in real life. Ya must be pretty far from home, then.”
“In many ways.”
“Why’re ya sitting out here, then? Whatcha meditating for?”
He nodded, the movement slow and deliberate. “I am waiting for my teacher.”
“Miss Cheerilee?” Apple Bloom said incredulously. The llama stared at her, his expression unchanging. “Naw. Figured not. Well maybe Ah can help find your teacher for ya.”
“Your kindness is appreciated, Little Apple, but I fear you will find that to be a difficult task.”
“Is he a llama like you?” She rubbed a hoof against her chin, already thinking of a plan of attack. Calling up the Crusaders, splitting the town with Scootaloo on the outskirts, Sweetie asking around the neighborhoods, and herself scoping out the market square.
“She is a Lama, but I do not know if she is a llama.”
Apple Bloom stopped, the plans quickly fizzling out, confusion taking their place. “Say what now?”
“I, of course am a llama, but not yet a Lama. She was, is, and will be a Lama, but perhaps not a llama.” He met her gaze steadily.
Apple Bloom’s mouth worked as she ran that all through her head. Then she noticed that twinkle in his eye again. “Now hold on just a minute,” she said, suspicion creeping into her voice. “Is this one ‘a them who’s on first businesses, cause Granny’s got that old record and Ah’ve heard it, buster.”
His head bowed. “You are clever indeed, Little Apple. Pardon my attempt at humor. In the tongue of my people, ‘Lama’ is another word for teacher. I could not resist tugging your hoof.”
She looked down at her hooves and then back up at him. His head tilted slightly.
“Oh!” she said. “Pulling my leg. Got it.”
“Yes.”
She smirked. “You’re funnier than you look.”
“My teacher put great emphasis on finding humor in life. We laugh, she said, so that we may cry.” He paused. “The teachings are probably confusing, particularly for one so young, but—”
Apple Bloom nodded. “Naw, makes sense to me. Ya can’t go through life with just one or the other. An’ you might as well get to work on the one that’s more fun.”
The llama didn’t say anything, just kept the same benign smile on his face as he gazed at her. She was beginning to pick up on the little things though, the way his ears twitched, showing some kind of amusement or interest.
“Now then. Tell me, what does your teacher look like?” Another ear twitch and eye glint, and she poked him in the side, surprised at how much his fluffy coat gave to her touch. “And Ah mean seriously!”
He nodded. “Very well. But I cannot say, as I do not know.”
“How can ya not know?”
“When I last saw my teacher, she was… I believe you ponies say ‘a yak’. Small in size for her kind, but larger still than the largest pony. She was ancient in years and graying with the wisdom of a full life. She departed from us peaceably, ready to move onward in her journey.”
“Then you followed her?”
“In a manner of speaking.”
“A yak,” Apple Bloom said. “It must be awfully interestin’, wherever you come from.”
“The Hillymayas,” the llama said. “I reside there with my brothers and sisters. They are… interesting is an apt word, indeed. Brother Spot is in fact what you call a Diamond Dog.” His eyes glimmered. “He says that it is short for “Spotting the flaw in the fabric’s weave”, but between you and me, I think he might be embellishing its origins.”
“Ya got a Diamond Dog for a brother?” He opened his mouth to answer, but she raised a hoof. “Hold on now. Let’s take this one bit ‘a crazy at a time. So, your teacher is a yak?”
“She was, but may not be still.”
She rolled her eyes. “Ah gotta tell ya, y’all llamas are a riddle wrapped in an enigma smothered in secret sauce. And Ah bet Lamas aren’t that much better, huh?”
“Pardon, Little Apple. It is… difficult. Many find the beliefs of my people to be strange or laughable. In such a way, it is easier to veil the truth so that only the dedicated seek it out.” She noticed his ears droop a little. “My teacher always disagreed with this. She preferred to be direct, even when I nonetheless often found myself mystified by her words.”
“Ya miss her, don’tcha,” Apple Bloom said quietly.
The smile faltered for only an instant. “More than you know.” The llama closed his eyes. “Tell me, Little Apple, have you ever heard of samsara?”
“No…?”
“It is the belief that all of life is a cycle, from birth, through life, through death. And from there, rebirth once again. The concept is difficult to grasp, I know.”
“Like seeds grow into a tree which makes apples which have seeds?”
His ears twitched twice. “Yes. Very good. And we are all the same way. Ponies, llamas, yaks, dogs… We all spend our time and pass. But we do not cease existing. As the apple vanishes, the seeds remain, for a new tree to be planted. Even if that tree does not recall its time in the fruit.”
“Sure, but I don’t get how that has anythin’ to do with anythin’…” Her eyes opened wide. “Wait. You’re sayin’… your teacher, she died?”
The llama’s head bowed slightly.
A flurry of emotions flashed across Apple Bloom’s face, as she raised a hoof, reaching out to him before awkwardly setting it down again. “Ah’m so sorry,” she finally squeaked out.
“It is the way of all things,” he said, but she noticed his ears drooping again. “But it is a new beginning too.”
“A new… tree?” she said, reassured a little by his calmness.
“Yes. But imagine if the apple seeds may grow into an orange tree, or a peach tree. The wheel turns, but it turns with purpose, and we are all placed according to our station. Perhaps a particularly wicked creature may be reborn as a fly or a rat, to atone for their misdeeds. But I am confident that my teacher’s virtues means she will be reborn in a manner befitting her wisdom. I simply seek to find her again.”
“So,” Apple Bloom said slowly. “You think she’s been reborn as somepony different? But she could be anypony, then!”
The llama nodded. “Indeed.”
Apple Bloom gulped. “That’s gonna be hard.” She bit her lip for a moment as she thought. “Maybe it’s my sister? She’s always telling me what to do, and she’s pretty much always right, too.”
“I do not think so. My teacher was not one for commanding, but rather questioning. Through her curiosity and wonder at the world around her, she brought all of us into a closer understanding of the universe.”
Apple Bloom frowned. “Alright, what about my brother? He’s pretty smart too, and sometimes just stares out at the fields for a while. An’ he hardly ever talks, so when he does you know it’s cause he’s got something real smart to say.”
Walky shook his head slowly. “My teacher was full of excitement and joy, always talking, always doing, always pushing to make the world a better place even when it seemed impossible.”
“Darn,” Apple Bloom said. “Ah don’t know if Ah’ll be much help then.”
“It is okay. I am content to wait here.”
Apple Bloom froze, suddenly remembering the reason she had started talking to the llama in the first place. “Oh! But… Ah think the ponies inside called the police. They’re gonna try and make you move, and then how are you gonna find your teacher?”
The llama looked unperturbed. “If it is to be, it is to be.”
“But… but…” Apple Bloom’s eyebrows drew together, unhappiness darkening her face. “It’s not fair. You’ve got just as much a right to be out here as anypony, and they’re only kicking up a fuss cause you’re different. It’s the same thing as with Zecora, ponies all afraid of a perfectly nice zebra or llama.”
“People fear what is different,” the llama said. “That is how it is.”
“Well, Ah don’t like it.”
“But it is how it is.”
“But that’s not how it should be.” She raised a hoof to stop him from repeating himself once more. “And it might be how it is, but only cause nopony knows any better, and it should change.”
The llama remained silent for a long moment. “Well said, Little Apple.”
Apple Bloom pursed her lips together. “It’s just not fair, that’s all.”
“Tell me, have you ever heard of the term ‘karma’?”
Apple Bloom shook her head.
“My people have this idea. It is…” He looked away for a moment, thinking. “I have heard the phrase before: ‘What goes around, comes around’.”
“Ah don’t get it.”
“There are creatures in this world who do bad, but only seem to profit, yes?”
Apple Bloom immediately thought of Diamond Tiara, of being pushed and pushed and pushed until she and the Crusaders fought back, only to be the ones to get in trouble while Tiara and Silver Spoon laughed behind Miss Cheerilee’s back. She ground her teeth. “Yeah, Ah know a couple.”
“There is a belief that there is balance in all things, even when we cannot see the weights or the scales. Equilibrium will be attained in the end.”
“So,” Apple Bloom said slowly. “Bad ponies who do bad things will eventually get what’s coming to them?”
“Hmm. In a manner of speaking. The good one does returns to them once more. I suppose the same must be said of evil.”
“Ah like that.”
His head tilted slightly. “Take solace in karma, but be wary of finding joy in misfortunes. Even of the deserving.”
“Ah don’t know,” Apple Bloom twiddled her hooves. “Ain’t nothing wrong about being fond of whatsit, equilibriums, right?”
A glint of humor shone in his eye. “I will leave that to you, Little Apple.”
She chuckled to herself. “Heh. Next time Ah’m at school and—” She froze. School. She glanced up at the sky to see the sun quite a bit further than it had been the last time she had looked. “Ah’m gonna be late!” She glanced back at the llama as her hooves danced in place. “Ah’m— You— The police—”
He made that rumbling sound again as he chuckled. “Go, Little Apple. I will be fine.”
She exhaled. “Ah hope you find your teacher!” And just like that, she took off, galloping on the way to the schoolhouse across town.
She was fast, and didn’t look back as she ran. So she missed it when the llama’s head bowed slightly, eyes sinking to the ground as his smile faded into a brief unease. And she didn’t hear his last words.
“I do too.”
It was early evening when Apple Bloom made her way back down the path to Barnyard Bargains. The sun had already begun its slow crawl towards the horizon, coloring the low-hanging clouds. She knew she was going to end up having to do her chores in the twilight, which always made things harder.
Plus that meant facing a rather upset Applejack who would want an explanation as to why she was so late, which would mean talking about... Apple Bloom let out a little growl of frustration. It all added up to plenty of reasons why she was dragging her hooves as she trudged onwards, and why she decided to go a bit out of her way to check in on her friend from the morning.
She was disappointed but unsurprised to see the front of Barnyard Bargains deserted, nopony – and nollama – waiting outside. She kept on, her head drooping.
“Little Apple?” a voice called out.
She perked up, eyes bright, looking for the source. There, in the little park across the way from Barnyard Bargains, she saw the llama sitting on the grass by the fountain.
“Mr. Walky!” she cried out, hastily cantering over. “Did they kick you out?”
He shook his head, maintaining his familiar warm smile. “I had a brief discussion with a courteous pony in blue and decided it would be more harmonious for me to move.”
“Oh,” she said. “Good, Ah guess.” She stared off over his right shoulder, a faint frown creasing her features.
“Something appears to be troubling you,” the llama said, gently.
“Yeah.” Apple Bloom shifted from one hoof to the other. “You could say that.”
“Do you wish to talk about it?”
Apple Bloom looked up at him, narrowing her eyes. “Well. Ya know this morning, you were talking about karma and equilibriums and that sort ‘a thing, right?”
“Yes?”
“Ah was explaining it to the Crusaders – those are my friends – and they all thought it was pretty neat. But then we ran into Diamond Tiara, and she was bein’ just as much a pain in the rear as she always is. An’ so, uhm, somepony came up with the idea that if karma wasn’t workin’ out right on its own, maybe it wouldn’t hurt to help it out a little. Ya know, nothin’ serious, just… Sometimes, the scales get sticky and ya need to push em a little to even them out. What goes ‘round comes ‘round, right?”
One of the llama’s eyebrows drifted up.
Apple Bloom twiddled her hooves. “An’ so that’s when we tied Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon to the merry-go-round at recess and tried to find out how fast it’d spin.”
The llama began chuckling and Apple Bloom glowered. “It ain’t funny!” she said. “Miss Cheerilee just about chewed our ears off and we all ended up with detention.”
The llama inclined his head slightly. “So tell me. Did this make you feel better?”
A tuft of grass suddenly demanded all of Apple Bloom’s attention. She scuffed her hoof at it, not looking up. “...No. Not really.”
“Interesting.”
Apple Bloom looked up, frowning. “Ah thought it’d even things out. Make up for all the stuff she’s done to us.” She chewed on her bottom lip. “But then, when Silver Spoon’s glasses fell off and she was screaming and Diamond Tiara started crying, Ah just felt awful. Ah guess being mean to somepony doesn’t fix anything, even if they deserve it. It just makes you a bully too.”
“Wise words.”
Apple Bloom flopped down onto the soft grass. “It’s just not fair, ya know? Why does it always end up with us feeling bad, even when we win?”
The llama was quiet for a long enough time that she thought for a moment he wasn’t going to answer at all. Finally, he spoke. “A wise teacher once said, ‘Life is suffering’.”
Apple Bloom rolled over, looking up at him. “Aw. Ah don’t sound that whiny. At least Ah hope not.”
He shook his head. “No, it is not about being melodramatic. It is the belief that there are many trials we must go through in this life, and these things bring pain.” He paused for a moment. “Even the things that we want. Perhaps particularly the things that we want.”
Apple Bloom tilted her head. “Huh?”
“Consider… actually, let us consider apples again.”
She nodded. “That’s a good start.”
His ear flicked in what she assumed was a kind of satisfaction. “Yes. So, say you see a beautiful, delicious apple that you want. Are you happy?”
“Not if Ah’m hungry, I guess. But who’s to say Ah don’t go eat it? That sounds pretty nice an’ happy to me.”
“Yes. You attain a momentary happiness. But then, even assuming the apple tastes as good as you have expected, you are still left with no apple. You will be hungry again soon. Are you happy?”
Apple Bloom scrunched her nose up. “Ah don’t know. Isn’t that just how things go? There’ll be another apple.”
“Perhaps. But after the next then you are left unhappy once again, desiring yet another apple.” The llama paused, thinking. “Tell me, what do you desire, more than anything else?”
Apple Bloom rolled her eyes. “Aw, that’s easy. Ah wanna find my—” She cut herself off. “Hold on. This is one ‘a them trick questions, isn’t it.”
“Is it?”
She jumped up to her hooves and began pacing in a circle. “It’s my cutie mark, that ain’t hard,” she muttered. “That wouldn’t make me unhappy. Though Ah guess it’s been pretty frustrating not havin’ it yet. Sure, that part makes sense. But when Ah get it, things’ll be different. Diamond Tiara won’t have no reason to pick on me, for one.”
She frowned. “Like she needs a reason. She ain’t gonna be my friend, cutie mark or no, and it’s not like Ah’d want her even if she did. That’s okay though, cause Scoots and Sweetie—” She froze, one hoof lifted in the air, and her head turned to stare daggers at the llama.
He didn’t respond, remaining silent as he smiled.
She began pacing again, more agitated. “If Ah got a cutie mark, can Ah still be a Cutie Mark Crusader? Ah mean, sure we made a promise to stick by each other until we all got our cutie marks. But what if my new destiny means Ah’ll be suddenly all busy with waterskiing or playin’ tennis or skydiving?” She glared at the llama again, speaking louder. “Now ya got me all worried. What am Ah supposed to do? Stop tryin’ to find my mark?”
He tilted his head slightly. “Is that what you want to do?”
“Hay no,” she said. “Being a Cutie Mark Crusader is the best thing in the whole world.”
“Then that is your answer.”
She blinked. “Ah don’t get it. What am Ah supposed to do? Try to get my cutie mark, not try to get my cutie mark, either way Ah’ve got problems to worry about.”
The llama nodded. “Indeed. But perhaps the answer is simply to exist in the moment. Perhaps it is best to see your desires as you see the momentary sufferings. As transitory things, the morning fog that is soon cleared away by the sun. They come, they go, but you endure.”
“That sounds pretty hard.”
His ears twitched. “Indeed, Little Apple. It becomes easier with practice.”
She grimaced. “But how am Ah s’posed to manage that? It’s easy to say, but when it comes to it? Ah mean, you seem just as smart as Zecora or Twilight and you’re still figurin’ it out. That’s a tall order for a filly like me.”
He blinked, a flash of puzzlement in his eyes. “I’m sorry?”
She looked up at him. “Well, Ah mean, you really want to find your teacher, don’tcha?”
He went silent for a long moment, his smile shifting to a more neutral expression. She was about to apologize when he chose to speak again. “That’s different.”
“Oh. Ah’m sorry. Ah expect she told ya to go find her before she… passed.”
The llama’s voice grew quieter. “Not exactly. She said… she told me to remain with my brothers and sisters. But she also said when I did choose to leave, that this, your town, is where I should go. I don’t know if she was telling the truth or not, but this was my only option.”
Apple Bloom blinked. “Well, something musta happened, right? It must be cause your brothers and sisters needed ya to go find her?”
“...No. I left over their protests.” He pressed his lips together. “We are small in number. I was chosen to be our next leader.”
“Then, if ya don’t mind me askin’, why are ya here?”
A pained look crossed the llama’s face. “Because I’m not ready. My teacher left far too early. I’m expected to guide others but I don’t know how.”
“She didn’t teach ya anything?
His head drooped. “All that I have learned is that I know very little.”
Apple Bloom tentatively raised a hoof to his shoulder. “Ah don’t know. You seemed plenty smart when helping me out. That whole leadin’ question thing so the other pony works it out on their own? That’s pretty neat.”
He didn’t answer, just stared at the ground, looking a little morose.
Apple Bloom frowned. She took a long moment to think hard, trying to dig for something supportive to say. When she finally started talking, it was hesitant, tentative.
“Ah think… maybe it’s like swimming.” The llama didn’t respond, and she pushed onwards, slowly gaining in confidence. “See, my friend Sweetie Belle, she didn’t learn how to swim for the longest time. Her parents ended up getting her swimming lessons and a coach at the pool. She musta done that every week for three months, and she still doesn’t really care for the water. Ya shoulda seen how long it took us to convince her to give Cutie Mark Crusader Cave-Divers a try, and that was even before Scootaloo got the octopus stuck in—”
She caught a sharp glance from the llama and coughed. “Anyways. On the other hoof, one day when I was still pretty little, my sister carried me out to the creek near our house. ‘Hold yer breath’, she said, and then she chucked me in the water just like that. And whatd’ya know, Ah figured it out, good and fast. Been swimming like a fish ever since.”
“I do not understand,” the llama said.
“Maybe…” Apple Bloom swallowed, hoping she hadn’t overstepped her bounds. “Maybe this is part of her way of teachin’ ya. Maybe she’s trying to say that you gotta stand on your own four hooves, and that’s the only way to really learn whatcha need to do.”
“You cannot be led to enlightenment,” he murmured, and Bloom got the feeling it wasn’t a statement but a recitation. “It is a hidden treasure that must be found.”
She blinked, and opened her mouth to reply when he suddenly moved, unfolding his legs and standing up. She craned her neck up and up and up. He wasn’t that much bigger than a pony, but with his long neck, he towered over her.
Until he stepped forward, bending one foreleg as he bowed low, his head falling all the way to rest barely above the grass. Apple Bloom took a step back in alarm, and then hastily bowed in turn.
“I have been foolish. I owe more to you than I can ever say, Blossoming Apple.”
She swallowed. His tone had completely shifted from its normal deep authority to something heavy with respect. She didn’t even dare to correct him on getting her name wrong.
“Uh… Ah... You’re welcome?” she squeaked out. “Just remember to take good care of your brothers and sisters. Family’s important, after all.”
He straightened up, looking down at her again. “Yes. Yes it is.” He paused, mouth opening and closing. “I must return to them with all speed.”
Apple Bloom looked up at him in alarm. “Wait, but—”
“I… hope we will meet again, Little Apple. Whether in this lifetime or a future one.”
Her protests died on her lips as he walked off, moving slowly but covering lots of ground with his long legs. He didn’t stop to look back, other than hesitating once again right when he was at the edge of view. For a brief moment he stood there, silhouetted against the dying sunlight that painted the sky a dusky orange.
And then he moved on, disappearing over a hill. Apple Bloom stood alone in the park, still trying to work out exactly what had just happened.
When Apple Bloom trudged into the Cutie Mark Crusader’s clubhouse the next afternoon, even her bow looked bedraggled. “Ah don’t think Ah like this karma thing after all,” she grumbled to herself.
At first she had thought she had been lucky last night. Big Mac and Applejack were both so busy with rounding up some errant fruit bats that they hadn’t even noticed her getting in late, sparing her from having to explain the circumstances.
...But as she found, that also meant that they had been behind on their own work, and so she had spent most of her normally quiet Saturday morning dashing back and forth trying to help out while surreptitiously doing the chores she hadn’t been able to finish the night before. She had gotten away with it, but it had been an awful, stressful morning.
She trotted into the clubhouse and expelled a huge sigh, sprawling out on her back on the floor. There was no sign of her two friends, which was worrying. Hopefully they hadn’t been grounded themselves. Particularly because if Sweetie got in trouble, then Rarity might find out and happened to talk to Applejack and…
Apple Bloom morosely stared up at the ceiling. Honestly, it wasn’t just worrying about getting caught. The whole thing made her unhappy – Bloom never claimed to live up to Applejack’s honesty, but it meant when she did end up lying to her sister it made her feel rotten.
And that bad mood made her mind drift to other worries. Like the realization that Diamond Tiara would really be pulling out all the stops now to get them back good. Apple Bloom probably owed her an apology, but ugh. Apologizing to Diamond Tiara. Who’s to say that wouldn’t just make her even meaner?
And it also brought up another memory… the new doubts that Mr. Walky had pointed out yesterday. The search for her cutie mark had always been her number one priority in life, and she had been happy with that. Sure, maybe more often than not impatient and frustrated, but happy, as long as she had her friends. Now the whole thing was tinged with the realization of the end that would eventually come, the new problems that would inevitably arise, the scary thought that maybe growing up meant growing apart and that her friends wouldn’t be there forever.
It was probably her mood that caused all the feelings to pile up at once, but still… Why did life have to be so complicated and stupid?
Apple Bloom groaned and sat up. Her eyes drifted over to the light bulb hanging from the clubhouse’s ceiling as she reached for some kind of inspiration, some kind of bright spot to take her mind off everything. A splinter from the wooden floor dug into her flank and she shifted, irritated at not being able to sit comfortably.
Then she blinked, as a dumb idea popped into her head. She slowly stood up, trotting over to the door, peering outside. The path up to the clubhouse was deserted. She walked back inside, her steps a little hesitant, her head swinging left and right self-consciously.
After confirming the clubhouse was good and empty, she bit her lip and took a seat again in the center of the room. One leg went over the other and then up and… She almost fell flat on her muzzle when she got a little too ambitious about how many times her legs were supposed to cross, but managed to figure it out, and a moment later, get her balance right so she could sit with her back straight up.
She swallowed, still feeling vaguely ridiculous. “Ah don’t even know what Ah’m supposed to be doing here,” she muttered to herself, her voice hoarse.
The main thing going through her mind was how sitting like this was pretty darn uncomfortable. How did Mr. Walky make it look easy? Her back was feeling kinda twingey at the awkward posture, and it seemed like one of her legs was twisted enough that it was about to fall asleep.
She gritted her teeth. Had to be something more important to focus on than just that.
She closed her eyes, hoping that would help. But she could hear some birds chirping in the trees outside. She idly wondered what kind of bird they’d be. Fluttershy’d probably know, and from just hearing their voices too. That would be a neat trick to learn, they’d have to make a note to put that on things to try next for—
She shook her head slightly. No, she needed to focus.
Thinking about cutie mark ideas would just cause her to start worrying again. Same for thinking about Scoots and Sweetie and where they were – not like they weren’t a little bit late half of the time anyways, but it would have been nice to see them again, maybe talk through some of this with a friend. Unless that only made them realize that they’d soon enough not have reasons to hang out anymore.
And there she was, getting distracted again with stupid thoughts.
It wasn’t like she really knew what she was doing, but it had to be something more than sitting quietly and thinking a bunch. That only got her into trouble. She tried to push away all the busy, buzzy thoughts that normally swirled around her head: the worries about her family, worries about her friends, the uncomfortableness of her position – which, okay, she had shifted slightly and was getting sensations back in that leg that was asleep but now it was that weird prickly feeling and eeurgh – the everpresent mild annoyance at the continued existence of Diamond Tiara. All of that, aside.
She focused on just breathing. That was a start.
What was it that Mr. Walky had said? Existing in the moment. Not worrying about all the little stuff.
She thought about her breathing.
In.
Out.
Her legs weren’t bothering her. Or, maybe they were, but it wasn’t really mattering anymore.
In.
Out.
Applejack and Big Mac crossed her mind, but she realized something. They’d probably be unhappy when she admitted she had gotten detention again, and Applejack would give her a good talking to, but only because she wanted the best for her sister. Only cause she did love her.
In.
Out.
Diamond Tiara would still be there tomorrow. And the day after. She’d still be a pain in the rear. Apple Bloom would be okay. Diamond Tiara couldn’t hurt her. In a sense… Diamond Tiara could only hurt herself.
In.
Out.
Her friends were her friends. Scoots and Sweetie Belle were more important than a stupid mark that’d come eventually. And they cared about each other way too much to let something like that get in the way. The future would bring problems and complications, but they’d figure it out together. They’d be okay.
In.
Out.
Somewhere, somehow, Apple Bloom let it go, all of the problems that were weighing her down. She let go of the big worries and the small, even the little bit of mid-afternoon hungriness fading away.
After a moment, she even stopped thinking about her breathing.
For an instant that seemed very long and very short, Apple Bloom simply existed.
Had somepony been there in the clubhouse that afternoon, they would have seen a pretty unfamiliar sight. For one, staying completely still was a decidedly un-Crusaderly state of affairs. And Apple Bloom was a filly who wore her emotions on her sleeve, making them clear as they veered from one extreme to another. As she sat in the center of the room, even the grimace of concentration had drained away from her face, leaving only a hint of a smile, like somepony had told a joke that only she understood.
And, if particularly pressed, that unnamed viewer might have remarked upon the angle of the light streaming through the windows, on how the shadows cast against her flank seemed to not quite match up as they should, as if something else lurked right against the border of seen and unseen.
“I told you, we can’t get a hang-glider again,” a voice chirped, barely audible as the wind carried it through the open door.
Apple Bloom’s eyes opened wide as her face lit up with a grin. She tried to jump up and sprawled forward on the floor as her tangled legs didn’t quite agree. It took a moment longer to extricate herself, but she quickly cantered over to the window, pushing it open to stick her head outside.
Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo trotted down the path through the apple orchards, wrapped up in a heated conversation. When they saw Apple Bloom, their exasperated expressions dropped away and they looked up with smiles of their own. Apple Bloom waved one hoof in a sweeping hello as she called out to them. “‘Bout time, you two!”
Scootaloo’s wings buzzed. “Hey, we’re not late!” she called out. “You’re early!”
Apple Bloom giggled and disappeared back into the clubhouse, only to reappear a moment later, trotting down the ramp out front. She galloped down the path to meet with her friends, giving Sweetie a quick hug and bumping hooves with Scootaloo.
The three of them turned to go their way, their voices cheerfully ringing out through the rows of apple trees.
Life went on in the sleepy village of Ponyville, the same as it always had.