> Dangersignal-The history > by The Stainmore Phoenix > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- > The basics of my family > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Now, me and my younger brother have never been good at telling stories. I mean, ours sounds pathetic on the face of it, but since you have asked, here it is. Not many people or ponies know about the original Sombra that ran the Crystal Empire. He was the most meticulous, but fair ruler. Our father was a Crystal Pegasus named Fallen Axe who ran the local Blacksmith's shops; while our mother, a unicorn named Ribbon Waves worked as a diplomatic adviser. I was born some seven years before the Princesses rose to power. I was born on Hearths Warming Eve, at 10:45:28 am. A year Later, on the same day, at 10:46:27 am, my brother was born. Call that what you will, I say I'm actually happy to have my little brother. While we may get into arguments and fight with each other, when push comes to shove, we are there for each other. I was born a Pegasus while my brother was born a unicorn. It's odd, but not totally unexpected, considering our parent's main pony types. Many reading this would expect us to be Alicorns straight out, but that's a dream we know we can't achieve. However, something I didn't expect is that my mother's side is related to the fifteenth king of the Vampony Kingdom in what is now the Dragon Kingdom. My father's side is related to the fifth Overlord of the Vampony Hunters which ruled the lands that have become Manehatten. How they came be me and my brother's mom and dad, we will never know. They claimed they fell in love so deep it was impossible to leave. Ah, if only Cadence were an Alicorn at this time, but alas, it is but a distant memory. I still love them, even when they did things that drove me and my brother crazy, such as asking Celestia to be our foalsitter. How in the world that happened, I don't know. As for their expectation that we'd drive Celestia crazy, they were sorely wrong. We were perfect little angels and by that, we did all that she asked. I could hear her telling my parents that we were the best foals she's ever foalsat. However, before we fast forward a couple years, I want to tell you something Celestia once told me and my brother, “That no matter how far your friends travel, no matter the terrain, they will come to aide you, even after they die.” Remember that, my dear readers, for our story has only begun > Life > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Fast forward to when I was eight and my brother seven. We were enrolled in an elementary school. While there were Crystal ponies all around us, we saw other types of ponies, such as moth ponies, changelings and Thestrals. We made friends with many of them, but as always, there were bullies. During my time growing up, I had a knack for getting into fights. I still remember one bully, a rather pathetic excuse of a rich art snob named Diamond Jubilee, who claimed her daddy owned gold mines (in reality, he was a potato farmer who struck it rich on the lottery and became a rather nasty piece of work. I will state for the record that I don't believe that all potato or any farmer are going to be like he was if and when they won the lottery). As for this Crystal Pegasus, she loved to run the class until she said something to crawl under my fur- “Why our great King had to use your pathetic excuse of a mom to be his adviser, I shall never know.” King Sombra chose my mother because she was a hard worker and could keep the peace. He had often times come to the house after me and my brother were asleep and would discuss diplomatic matters long into the night. So to say that as if he was making a mistake really set me off. She wasn't the first one to do it, but she was the first one to use scumbags to inflict injury. Eventually, it devolved into fighting and I managed to give her a black eye and a busted nose. “Serves her right,” a filly said. While the school kids praised my fighting skills, the professors and my parents took a din view of the whole thing. They saw my fighting as me stooping to her level. I didn't and my brother was never picked on again. As for Diamond Jubilee, she and her daddy ran to another town, where she could have full run of the school ground and order others around (Last I heard of her while I was in the guard, she was jailed for pinching Celestia's jewelry to sell on the black market.) As for the rest of the school years, we spent them in peace. I was a hard working student who worked for every grade. My brother seemed to be a naturally gifted unicorn. As for our friends, we always had some misadventures. Cold Blade, the changeling friend we had, always loved drawing up crazy schemes for us to get money. Morning Dew Breeze, the moth pony, had an affinity for being attracted to the stupidest things in the world. Short Fuse, the thestral of group, loved to set things on fire. To him, there was no problem so great that it couldn't be solved with a bit of pyrotechnics. Of course, this lead us to burn down the kitchen while trying to make brownies and cakes to sell as a Crystal Faire. Oh boy were we in for it when our parents found out. Leave us say that we were doing all the nastiest chores to compensate for that and from that day on, we had a foal sitter to watch us, but sadly, our kitchen misadventures would go on in later years. However, as time moved forth, we began to grow up and look for jobs. By the time I was twenty and my brother was nineteen, we had our first jobs. I worked as a file clerk for a large banking firm for the amazingly high sum of 35 bits/hour. My brother worked for a boutique store at the rate of 15 bits/hour. We're as rich as mice! As for our dad, his blacksmith's job eventually landed him a contract making armor for the Crystal Army as well as royal armor for King Sombra. I guess fortune smiles on those who have good will towards all. That and we had a slight run in with many of the nobles who's heads were so far in the clouds that any drop to reality would have killed them. However, things were changing. Celestia and Luna had taken power and were ruling the lands near the Everfree Forest, and they needed diplomatic advisers, so Sombra put forth our parents name and my group of friends were coming with us to continue our misadventures. The reason for our friends coming with us is because there's a town near the Everfree and it needed residents. However, Fate comes a knockin with plans of evil that no-one could ever dream of. > An Offer to not be Scorned > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Time passed slowly. However, King Sombra II had taken control, but was not yet his dictatorial self. It was three days before my thirteenth birthday when news came. “Your sister has some kind of rare medical condition that the doctors here haven’t seen before, but they know only one thing, she’s slowly dying,” our father said. “But…she only just came into the world,” I heard my brother protest. “There is nothing we can do,” father said. “It’s fate’s will.” I consoled my brother to the best of my ability. Now, we faced a problem-my parents were out of a job and we needed some way to get money so we could see if there was some way we could save our little sister. If any pony ever heard the phrase “Every cloud has a silver lining”, please tell me how my silver lining came to me in the shape of a dark blue Alicorn with a moon cutie mark? It was late Sunday evening, heading towards eight pm and dinner time. My mother could easily cook a dinner that was both filling and satisfying. Anyways, there was a knock at the door. “I’ll get it,” father said. I heard noises, then I saw my father come into the kitchen and dining room. “A pony by the name Luna has come here,” he said. “To see our sons, dear.” “Really?” she asked. “What’d you do to bring a princess down here?” I heard my father swallow his tongue. I deadpanned and mentally gulped. My brother fell straight over, his legs sticking straight up. My sister’s eyes widened. My mother gave me a dirty look. “I swear, if you’ve gotten into another fight,” she said. “You’ll be scrubbing toilets with your tail for the next eight years.” “Let’s hear her out,” I said. “Then we can go from there.” I watched as father went *I will continue to call him father as it’s my affectionate nickname for him and I hold him in high regard.* for our guest, who was invited to join us for dinner. “I must thank thee,” our guest said. “No problem, Princess,” we said, bowing. I watched as my little sister attempted to bow, but collapsed. I went over and helped her up. “Don’t hurt yourself,” I said. “I’d much rather have you in one piece.” “Your way too caring,” my little sister said. “Just doing my job, Rose Link,” I said. My parents hadn’t told me she had a name and I just took a lucky guess there, but our attention was turned to our guest. She smiled and looked at me. “I must ask where thou learned to fight?” she quizzed. “Oh, you saw that little performance?” I quizzed in reply. She nodded. “I learned from having to deal with a good number of bullies,” I said. “I always got into fights and trouble, sometimes over the silliest of things, like enjoying books.” “I must say, I don’t really approve of you fighting, but I came with an offer from my older sister,” Luna said. I gulped. Now Celestia knew about me getting into fights? Great. My main concern was what would this offer be? Luna smiled. “Ever since we started a Royal Canterlot Guard, we’ve had problems with equipment going missing,” Luna said. “There has been speculation amongst the guard that some members have been stealing supplies and selling them on the market. We would like you to take up guard position outside the supply rooms.” “But don’t you have any guards already in that position?” I asked. Luna shook her head. “Afraid not, young one,” she said. “Many guards who protected the room were the ones suspected of the thievery.” “So you want me to stand guard, and make sure that the guards withdraw only the materials they have clearance for?” I asked. “Yes,” she said. “As of right now, this is a proposal from Celestia herself. She set the wage at seventy five bit’s an hour. She also set the hours that you’d work-10 am to 10 pm.” “Hmm…12 hours at 75 bits. Lets see 12*75=900 bits per day,” I said. “Figuring that I get paid on Sunday-900*7=6,300 bits a week. Taxes would be one third so 6,300/3=2,100 bits to live on, that would be sufficient to work for. I’ll consider while we eat and give my answer before you leave.” Luna nodded in response to me giving her an answer before she left, but gave a wry chuckle. “There are some taxes, but they’ve already been calculated,” Luna said. “You’d only be paying 150 bits in taxes.” This time it was my turn to swallow my tongue. I’d keep most of my check?! I took one look at my family who were all giving me the look. I swallowed food and not my tongue, then spoke. “I’ll take you up on your offer,” I said. “I do have some other questions, but they can wait until we’ve finished. I’d be rude to keep us from enjoying dinner.” I will say one thing, our dinner must have tasted like it was something cooked from the heavens. Even Luna complimented my mother on her cooking. While my younger brother helped my mother clean up the dishes, my father, sister and me were sitting with Luna. “You said you have questions,” Luna said. “Please ask them.” “Okay, my first question is when do I start?” I asked. “If your family can spare you, you’d start tomorrow,” she said. My father nodded. I asked my next question. “Will I be taking the train to Canterlot and back?” I asked. “Actually, my sister has you staying in the guest room at the castle,” Luna said. “Okay, now I have a question,” my father said. “What about his education?” “He’ll be enrolled in Canterlot Academy,” Luna said. “Along side my sister’s niece, Princess Mi Amore Cadenza.” “Uh, I though that Princess Mi Amore Cadenza was born right now,” I said, remembering something I read in a newspaper. “I mean, how can she be my age? It’s physically impossible.” “Actually, she was born at the same time as you, young Pegasus,” Luna said. “As an Alicorn herself, her aging is different. If you were to ascend yourself, then maybe you’d understand it yourself.” That’s dreaming if I ever did that. There was no way in Tartarus that I’d become an Alicorn. However, Luna interrupted my thoughts. “When we get started, we’ll need a name,” she said. “Do you have one?” I looked down, very shamefaced. “We don’t have a name for him or his brother,” father said. Luna gave a chuckle and looked at me. “Ever heard the term hoofticuff?” she asked. “Yes, Princess,” I said. “I was thinking that we could call you that until you give yourself a proper name,” Luna said. My father grinned at that, and said that if I couldn’t come up with a name, then we’d use Luna’s name for me. “That sounds good,” I said. With that, Luna departed and I packed what materials I needed and waited for the morning. > On the Job and Rising to Stardom > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- I hate the Royal Canterlot Guard right now. I just started, and the guards decided to yank me around by playing pranks. Some of these pranks included falsifying withdraw records, replacing my weapon *a lance* with a pack of party supplies, playing the look alike game *in other words, two ponies who look exactly the same come from opposite directs and pretend to be the other one*, and of course-tying me up, gagging me and locking me in a wooden chest. After the twelfth time this happened, Celestia actually gave me permission to get violent with them. “With pleasure,” I said once she left. I should mention that the whole “prisoner” bit always takes place on a Sunday, my payday. Getting back to the matters at hoof, I was now ready for Monday, and let’s just say, I never got a greater pleasure then when I was knocking some poor lance corporal’s teeth down his throat. As for the generals in charge of supply, they couldn’t give two bits when they heard all the complaining. In fact, they wanted to increase my pay. “Kid, you’ve got it good,” one of the generals, a one star named “Double Star” said. “Street fighting skills and able to handle some pony ten times your size. I never got into any fights.” “Your lucky. I kept getting into trouble because I got into fights,” I said. “You know, if you keep up the good work, you might make a double rank,” he said to me. “Alicorn Field Marshal, the top rank in the Royal Canterlot guard, and in supply, the most important job out there.” “You’re too kind,” I said. “I’m just a simple peon here. You’re my commanding officer.” He grinned and told me that I should keep up the good work. I saluted him and returned to work. I still had the occasional idiot, but the troops generally respected me after they heard I could hold my own. In fact, on the idiots, I remember one particular event. It happened three days before the Hearthswarming Eve that I would turn 14. Two soldiers were coming back from a drunken night on the town. This time, instead of wanting to tie me up, gag me and lock me in a trunk, they were intending to tie up, gag and lock Celestia in a garbage can for the laughs. “Halt, right there,” I said. “Lishen pal,” one slurred. “I’m a four shtar general.” “Right, and I’m Starswirl the Bearded,” I snorted sarcastically. “But I have to tell you, the Storage facilities here are closed up until the morning. So you just go to your barracks and sleep off the drink.” “You don’t know who your messhing with pal,” his companion slurredly snarled. I told them to go to bed. They kept slurring their threats and snarling pathetically. Now, I have no desire to be drunk, but I had witnessed this spectacle many times before and had a great understanding of it. They gave me a dirty look and charged at me. I slipped under the bigger earth pony guard and gave him a solid punch to his stomach, causing that one to double over. His companion snarled again and lunged. I jumped up and bucked him in the sweet spot on the back of the neck, causing him to collapse. “I told you to go to your barracks!” I snapped. “Now you’ll have to go to the medics tent.” I called over the lieutenant from the Seventh Royal Dispatch Unit. Name-Quickfire, pony type-Pegasus, eye color-dark orange, coat color-fiery orange, mane color-fiery red, cutie mark-a stream of fire. “Yes,” he said. “Need me to do something?” “Can you get the medics?” I asked, pointing to the casualties. “You’ve got to stop knocking them around,” he chuckled. “Otherwise the rest of the guard will consider you an enemy.” “I know,” I said. “But orders are orders.” He rolled his eyes and was off. I sighed and stayed with the sleeping beauties. It was a short wait, and he returned with several medics and a couple of stretchers. “Can you help us load them in?” one of the medics asked. “Certainly,” I said. I was never happier than when I was loading these drunks in and watching them be carried off. Before I tell you anymore, I must apologize to you, the reader, and my biographer. I was in a hurry to get my history to him and I didn’t check my facts thoroughly enough, so the beginning is wrong on when I became an Alicorn. Here is the factual telling of when I became an Alicorn. It was the next day, Double Star came to see me when I clocked on at ten am. “Celestia wants to see you,” he said. “Why?” I asked. “Remember when I said that you’d make a double rank-Alicorn Field Marshal?” he asked. “Yeah, but I said that it was wishful dreaming,” I replied. “Well, Celestia said that she was very pleased with your work and I talked with her about you and she said that based upon your situation, she’d be willing to do this one thing for you,” he said. “Wait a minute!” I cried. “You mean, at the age of thirteen, I’m to become an Alicorn Field Marshal?!” “Yes,” he said. “Celestia said that the rank is normally reserved for ponies who spend their lives in the Royal Canterlot Guard, but you proved to be something else entirely. In fact she said that there isn’t a rank created that would fit you.” Okay, I understand working for her, but isn’t it a general’s job to bestow rank onto peons? If the princess did that, then my next question is one that would need a lot of explaining-Why give me such a powerful and trustworthy position at my age? “You’d better get going,” Double Star said. “Celestia doesn’t like to be kept waiting.” “Yes, Sir,” I said and trotted off. I made it to the castle’s mane foyer and was greeted by two pegasi guards, who just looked at me with a deadpan expression. I was looking around at the giant castle as it was my first time in the castle proper. I mainly slept in the small quarters next to the supply cabin. “Ah, Hoofticuff, nice to see you,” a voice said. I blinked, looked up and saw an Alabaster white Alicorn adorned in gold hoof boots and crown walk towards me. I went to bow, but a wing stopped me. “No need to bow young Hoofticuff,” she said. “I wished to see you about your new title.” “About that,” I said. “Are you 100% sure you want to trust some pony as young as me with this?” “It’s not that I am unsure,” she said. “It’s that you have proven yourself exceptionally well and have even gone beyond the call of duty. I therefore bestow that rank upon you in recognition of your services.” “Uh…Thank you,” I said. “Thank you very much.” “You hesitate,” she said calmly. “You nervous about your rank raise?” “Yes,” I said. “I never imagined this day would come.” “I did,” Celestia said. “You do deserve this more than any pony.” I thanked her and from there, she called in Luna, who actually turned me into a full fledged Alicorn. Celestia simply bestowed the rank of Field Marshal on me. I bowed and left. From there, I was still on guard detail, but for Luna. “I give you my word of honor as a gentle stallion and an Officer that no harm shall befall you,” I said to her one night. Soon, Hearthswarming Eve came and my family came down for a visit. My mother practically fell over in happiness. My younger brother gave me an envious look while my father and little sister were busy inspecting my badge and SIMJ (Standard Issue Military Jacket) and the rank stitched upon it. “Oh, I can’t believe it,” Rose Link said. “My brother, a Field Marshal. Uh…What is a Field Marshal?” “Five Star General,” I said. “And I’m replacing the General in charge of Supply, who’s retiring.” “And how’d you get picked?” my mother asked. “My commanding officers put my name forth as the suitable pony for the job,” I said. “And it was granted by Princess Celestia and Princess Luna bestowed the rank on me. Oh, and I also became an Alicorn, to go with the rank.” “You’re a lucky little pony,” Rose Link said. “Well, we can hope that things will look up,” I said.