Silent Lucidity

by CountDerpy

First published

Dreams offer an escape from pain. When the dream gets too real, can you tell what is reality?

Scootaloo knows Rainbow Dash is gone. She was there at the funeral, she carried the casket, and she put the rose on her grave. A horrible nightmare.

Scootaloo knows Rainbow Dash is alive. She was just with her flying, spending the whole day with her idol, and loving every moment of it. A dream come true.

Scootaloo knows that she is dreaming. She knows that the dream isn't real. The hardest thing to tell is...which is really the dream?

A story of internal conflict based on the song Silent Lucidity by Queensryche.

MY FORTH STORY FAILED BY EqD!

Silent Lucidity: Night

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Silent Lucidity

Rain and Fog. Even the sky was crying on a day like today.

It hasn't even been an hour since her casket was opened and the public allowed in to see her lifeless body. Scootaloo was of course the first one through the doors, crying as she ran all the way to the side of the silver casket. No pony blamed her, and everyone knew that she would react this way to seeing her idol and older sister laying lifelessly in a metal box.

Scootaloo hadn't known what had happened. She wasn't there to the the horrific crash that took away her only family. Even as she sat there watching the ambulance rolling away silently from the stadium in Manehattan, the signed adoption paper held tight in her arms, she had no idea at what had happened. She didn't know until hours afterwards what had occurred inside the stadium. The doctor she talked to once she entered the hospital had said she lost control trying to attempt a trick she had been developing in secret, one that she later found out had been named after her. Rainbow launched into one of the walls of the stadium, breaking all of her ribs and severing her spinal chord.

He had told her that even if she had survived the accident, that likely she would be in a vegetative state for the rest of her life.

We tried our best, Scootaloo. I know it is hard, and it was a long shot that the things we tried would work. The only thing that we could really do was watch as she slipped away. I am very...truly sorry. She had remembered the doctor saying as he handed her the pair of goggles that Rainbow was wearing during her first performance as a full fledged Wonderbolt. The hurricane glass lenses were cracked and blood stained the dark leather straps around the eye pieces. She couldn't bear to look at what she was hold. It wasn't true. Rainbow Dash wouldn't die from a trick. Rainbow Dash couldn't die. Right?

Squirt, I'm always gonna be here for ya!Scootaloo heard in the deep recesses of her mind. The last words ever spoken by the greatest pegasus in the world, the first word she ever heard from a true family. She couldn't fight back the flood of tears as she collapsed to the ground, screaming her lungs out. It just can't be true, she screamed to herself.

"Scootaloo." A voice whispered in a heavy tone behind her. The filly looked over her shoulders to the orange mare that had taken up residence on the floor beside her. She felt the warmth of Applejack's hoof as it fell softly on her back and pulled her close. The mare rested Scootaloo's head on her shoulder, embracing her with more emotion that Scootaloo had ever seen from anypony. Tears rolled down her cheeks and onto the pegasi's back, her mouth opening to speak but no words coming out.

The two held tight to each other before Scootaloo felt the hooves leave her back, her eyes drifting up to the bloodshot whites of Applejack's own crying emerald eyes. "Ah'm so sorry this happened, but we're all here for ya."

Scootaloo nodded as more tears welled up behind her eyes. She slowly got up to her hooves, the black leather Wonderbolts jacket that had been given to her earlier that month hung heavily off her back, providing her with a small amount of warmth and protection from the cold, colorless interior of the mortuary. Slowly she moved towards one of the benches that had been set up, sitting silently on one end before curling up into a ball underneath.

She said nothing as the mourners continued to file in and past the eternally peaceful mare. The only thing she could bring herself to do was watch them and the room around her get smaller and smaller. She felt trapped and alone while shadows from lit candles danced across the now darkened room. Each one approaching her and menacingly drilling sadness further into her psyche.

"I thank you all for coming today as we pay our respects to a great flyer, a great mare, and an even greater friend." Scootaloo looked out from behind her jacket at the alicorn giving her eulogy. "Rainbow Dash's life ended as she lived, wild and fast. No matter what she did, she did it with determination, speed, and unwavering loyalty to her friends and family. It makes me happy to see that she affected so many lives in her short 28 years in this world. Whether it be from the countless times that she has helped defend our land and way of life from enemies much larger than she ever was, or from just simply being there for you when you needed it most. That fact is she touched everyone's life, and we are grateful to have known her."

Twilight stopped for a moment to wipe away the tear drops from her eyes before pulling out a piece of paper from her dress. "Rainbow Dash asked in her will that this be read at her funeral, and she asked for a certain pony to read it, if she wants too."

Scootaloo didn't even need to hear her name called out through the hall to know that it was her that Dash had wanted to read it. She slowly picked herself up from the bench and looked up at Twilight. The mare looked down at her. "Scootaloo, would you like to read this?"

She wasted no time in nodding and walking up to the stage. Twilight stepped away from the podium and helped Scootaloo to re-situate the microphone so she could speak into it. "Thank you, Twilight."

Her attention shifted out to the crowed hall, looking out over the sea of faces as they looked back at her. Not a single face was not wet with tears as she looked out at them. It was hard to tell if they were more sad about Dash passing, or about having to see Scootaloo deal with everything. She looked down at the piece of parchment and cleared her throat.

"Hello. If Scootaloo or whoever is reading this to you now, it means I might have done something stupid and died. Hopefully I didn't. I wanted to leave this note for everyone because...well I don't know why. I guess there were final things that I wanted to say to everypony, and I probably didn't have time to say any of them." Scootaloo took a deep breath and looked over at the front row. "Twilight. I always thought of you as a close friend even though I didn't always show it. Calling you an egghead all of the time, dive bombing into you house on more than one occasion, and just my general tomfoolery probably drove you batty. No offence Fluttershy. I wanted to say that I am sorry for all of that. You are a good pony and you will do wondrous things, but just once more for old times sake. Egghead."

Twilight sadly chuckled at the words as Scootaloo shifted her gaze. "Rarity. Out of all of our friends, you were the one who I was most annoyed and terrified of. I hated it when you dragged me to the spa or when you made me wear froufrou outfits. That being said, they were some of the best moments we shared together, even if they were partly against my will. I will miss you and I hope that your business continues to thrive and you make it big like you always wanted. Knowing you, I'm probably laying in a box somewhere in the room in one of your dresses. Hope it's a good one, I want to look as awesome in death as I did alive." Dash's letter was more than right. Rarity had slaved over that dress for hours before the funeral, making sure every detail would have been up to Dash's standards. The short but still flowing gown made from the torn remnants of her Wonderbolts uniform still made jaws drop at the sight of it. A small chain made of shimmering stars hung from her neck, with a locket in the shape of her cutie mark. Inside was a picture of everyone together, and then another of just her and Scootaloo. Upon her head was the circlet crown that she had won at the Best Young Flyers Competition a few years ago. "Pinkie Pie," Scootaloo continued, "You were and will always be the best friend I could ever have asked for. There was nothing that you couldn't do, and the pure random craziness that is your life always brought both smiles and annoyance to my face. I hope whatever after party you have planned for after this is enough to get everypony to cheer up. After all, it's what your best at."

"Fluttershy. You were my very first friend, and one of the few ponies who know my deepest and darkest secrets and feelings. You were the most kind and sweet pony that I have ever had the distinct pleasure of meeting or just having been acquainted with. Live long and lead a happy life, also look after my house and my..and my little sis if you would." Fluttershy cried harder as she buried her head into Pinkie's shoulder, the two sharing a loving embrace that only the closest of friends and lovers could share. \

"Applejack. There were so many thing that I wanted to say to you that I could have written a novel about it, you know if I was an egghead. Sorry Twilight, needed to take one final shot. There were times that you pissed me off and stressed the living hell out of me, and there were other times that we were closer than...I don't know..you would probably put it like 'two apples in a glass of cider' or something like that. It really doesn't matter how you put it, we were just very close. I wanted to say thing for a very long time, but I had one heck of a crush on you, but never really wanted to say it or could bring myself to say it. Now probably wasn't the best time, but hey what can you do."

Applejack just looked up at Scootaloo in shock, the occasional dropping tear turned into a river of emotions. "Did she really say that?"

Scootaloo nodded and looked back down at the paper. "Too all of you girls, I love you so much. You were my best friends and the best, most awesome ponies that anyone has ever known. I will miss you all. Finally....Fin..Finally." Scootaloo started to break up, she could help it as she saw her name listed next. She wanted to read it so bad, but didn't know if she could bear to see whatever it was that had been written about her.

"Scootaloo, you going to be ok?" Twilight asked from beside the filly.

"Yeah, I just needed a moment. That's all." She said between the sobs, quickly trying and failing to recompose herself. "Finally, to the best little sister in the world. Scootaloo I know I wasn't always there when you needed me to be, and I hate myself for that fact of my life. It was really easy to see that I was a major part of your life. I was your role model, your friend, and the only family you ever knew. I know you probably hate my guts for leaving you all alone once again, and even if my death wasn't a matter of my own stupidity, I wanted to say that I am sorry. I can only hope that when you read this, you will forgive me for everything that I have done. I love you Scootaloo. I always will love you."

Scootaloo wiped her tears away and shuddered. She sat the paper down and looked out at the crowd. "Rainbow Dash was the best pony that I have ever known. She was the only pony that I considered close family besides my two closest friends. She may have said that she was never there for me, but she truly was there. She cared for me, she loved me, and earlier that day...she even adopted me. I can't begin to describe how much that meant to me, how much that meant to Dash too. All I can do now is hope that she is here with us today, and hope that she hears this. I forgive you, Rainbow. I will love you forever and ever, and I hope that you can rest in piece. "

She stepped down from the podium, taking one final look at the peacefully sleeping mare before walking back over to her place on the bench. She sighed as tears began to fall before a small yellow hoof wiped away her tears and a filly nuzzled up beside her. Twilight stepped back up to the podium, her own tears falling and staining the white oak podium. She took a slow, deep breath in. "Thank you Scootaloo for those kind and honorable words. As we close the lid, may I ask that everyone bow their heads in a moment of silence out of respect for the departed. Thank you."

"It'll be ok, Scootaloo. We'll make sure yer taken' care of." Applebloom said with a half-hearted smile. Scootaloo didn't look at her, but a small smile crossed her face as she nuzzled back against her friend.

"Thanks, Applebloom." She said as Twilight closed the lid on the coffin and sealed it forever.


Scootaloo hurt as she walked with the group of stallion towards the top of the hill on the edge of town. Her arms were sore from the weight of the casket resting on her shoulder, but knew that Rainbow would have endured the same thing for her if she had died first. She wanted to be just as strong as Rainbow.

The top of the hill was barren except for one lonely willow tree that blocked out the funeral plot from the harsh elements that surrounded them. Even thought Scootaloo could see the stars through the slate grey sky, it still didn't make the rain anymore pleasant as they walked. Every cold drop stung like acid, mixing with the sweat dripping down onto her raw skin. The mountain of emotions that pressed down on her mind didn't make anything easier either.

The group of pallbearers finally reached the soon to be final resting place of Rainbow Dash, lowering her coffin onto the motorized lowering device that would put her six feet under. Scootaloo backed away and picked up a flower from the edge of the tree. It was a dark black flower with flecks of white, purple and odd shades of red and blue that made it look like the entire universe was in somepony's hooves. A universe rose, her favorite.

"Dear Scootaloo. We hope that you are going to be alright through this night and not lose yourself in your sorrows." A haunting voice whispered from behind the tree. Scootaloo looked around the tree, finding nothing but the impressions of four hooves on the wet grass.

"Princess Luna?" She asked to herself, before looking back at the group of mourners that had gathered around the now lowering casket. She walked over and picked up a large clump of dirt, tossing it into the hole as the device came to a halt. Big Macintosh and Soarin both grabbed the shovels that had been sitting near the plot and began pushing the dirt back into the hole. The mourners began to disperse into the shadows, save for Scootaloo and all of Dash's close friends. They stayed until the last bit of dirt was pressed firmly onto of the grave, a solemn reminder that she was gone forever.

Scootaloo walked over to the grave and looked at the marble headstone that had been crafted just for her. It was a black marbleized granite with her cutie mark placed in a glowing stone pattern across the back. The front was carved perfectly and the letters stood out in the cold darkness that started to surround the filly.

Rainbow Dash
Born February 1st, 976 CR
Died July 23rd, 1004 CR
A devoted and loyal friend, sister, and lover.

Scootaloo sighed and rested the universe rose up against the headstone, slowly rising off the ground and looking all around her. Everything was dark. Everything was cold. She didn't even have to see the rain to know it was still there, but the sound of falling water rushing by her ears wasn't helping.

"No...I can't be alone. I don't want to be alone. "She cried as she spun around, her heart racing as darkness began crushing her in. She couldn't see, the painful sound of rain was blocking all other sounds, and she couldn't even find the strength to breath in the crushing darkness.

"Help me!" She screamed as she collapsed to the ground, her breathing slowing more as her eyes began to droop. Everything was fading away. The only thing that Scootaloo could see before she blacked out was a familiar silhouette standing with white glowing eyes just a few feet from her. She sighed her last few words as consciousness left her body, leaving her mind empty as she drifted off into slumber. "Rainbow...Dash...help..."