> ~When I was scared~ > by BewhoUr > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- > I was left to cry there > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Life's rough kid. remember that as you embark on your journey through it. my story is one rarely told. one feared to know. one that may be dangerous to have, and one that I've locked in the depths of my soul for as long as i can remember. my first memory was the sound of rain pounding on the roof of my house. i lived in canterlot. in a castle. and i could remember the splash of rain on my muzzle as it leaked through the ceiling. Oh, what? you've never heard of castles leaking? sorry to have confused you. i didn't live in one of the royal rooms of the castle. i lived in the guest room. why? Because i was considered a disgrace. the daughter of 2 alicorns should be an alicorn. but no. i was an earth pony. a useless earth pony. unlike my sisters, who were the future princess and the future wonderbolt. but what was i? the future servant to my older sisters. my parents never visited me, almost as though they figured i would just go away. that's why i owe my well being to aloe and lotus blossom. they worked for my parents and always thought i was special. maybe it was the fact that i was always so strong, despite the little attention i got, or the fact that i wouldn't care what others thought of me. anyway, they loved me. they believed in me. and i can tell you right now those were two kindhearted ponies. i lived in that guest room up until the age 4 thinking, staring out my window, and pondering, which may be why i'm the mare i am now. the mare who lives in her head. one day I finally met my parents. they were alicorns alright. snobby, snooty alicorns. maybe i was biased. but i didn't care then. i was angry. i was scared. i was heartbroken. it makes me laugh thinking about the meaning that heartbroken had for me. it was a terrifying and beautiful word. they didn't apologize, and i was foolish to expect them to. they gave me a choice. > Invisible to you > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- They said work or go. they told me that i could become their servant or leave and never come back. that's when i started praying with all my strength, wishing i was an alicorn. i just wanted my parents to like me. was that so much to ask? Anyway, there were two reasons i stayed. 1 was that i couldn't leave lotus and aloe. they were the closest to family i had. 2 was that i still believed that i could make my parents love me, somehow. so i decided to be a servant. the next few years of my life were spent living a lie. a lie that i told myself again and again. even after lotus and aloe left for ponyville, i stayed, my whole life based on that lie. until i finally gave up. now, i don't give up very often. but i was 14 now, and i hadn't lived yet. i needed a life. so one day, i packed the very little clothing i had and a heart locket that my sisters had given me, slipped under my door. while it was comforting to know i had family who loved me, i still had to leave. my last night there, i lay in my bed, sobbing over lost chances. and that was when i got my cutie mark. a broken heart. when i first saw it, i didn't know what it ment. even now its unclear. but i do know one thing. > why should I care > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- I was strong. I may have been a bundle of nerves and tears at many times, but i was me. and i didn't need wings or a horn to prove that. i marched up to my parents the next morning and told them that i was going. when they saw the strong mare that stood in front of them, unafraid and proud, they asked me to stay. but i said no. staying was all i ever wanted. but i couldn't do it. not after the way they made me suffer with longing for 14 years. It was never about being an alicorn. it was about acceptance. and that was all i wanted. and i had just turned away and given it up. i sometimes regret my decision. but i know in my heart i did the right thing. i set off to the everfree forest and made friends with some of the darker, more mysterious figures who lived there, such as a cloaked zebra and a rather gentle bear. i found ponyville but a year after the rebellion and reunited with aloe and lotus. i managed to put myself through school with earn money babysitting. and i never looked back. one day, i saw my mother in a dream. i was about to walk away when she stopped me. she said she would make me an alicorn if that was my wish. but that wasn't my wish anymore. and i refused. > farewell > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- i had already proved myself. i knew i was an amazing mare. and to be honest, i didn't want to be an alicorn. i became a respected member of ponyville, meeting more friends and watching the elements of harmony grow up. i'm still a young mare, and i plan to live fully. life is a precious gem, unique and priceless. use your time wisely. I will now take the time to say goodbye, my neice and nephew. this letter may be of use to you in the future, so please keep it. scout, my wonderful niece. you have a good pair of wings on your back and a strong will. you remind me of me. and bronze soul, my nephew, your grades in magic are exelent and your potential high. listen to your dreams, both of you. -your loving aunt, Roxy > P.S. > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- i have come to realize that what doesn't kill you really does make you stronger. though i always struggled, i came out a better mare in the end. my journey has also left me realizing the value of equality. whether you are an earth pony whose rooted to the ground but has her heart in the sky, a pegasi soaring through the air and managing the weather, a unicorn with supreme magical abilites, or an alicorn with all these things, you are special. i do wonder, though, what has happened to change our ways. we used to be so biased. now we live in a harmony without any reguard to magic. was it something along the way, an unnoticable battle that gave us equality in equestria? or, though it may seem selfish, was it partly my struggle? i guess only time will tell. and time is one of the only things you can trust. live a good life and never look back. > P.P.S > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- I thought i would encourage the use of your rights. shout as loud as you can today.