Chapter 1 - The Conductor
It was a quiet day in Ponyville. The roads held few ponies as the sun rose just above the horizon. In one section of Ponyville, Twilight Sparkle and Spike strode through the market, looking for early-bird deals.
They spotted Applejack setting up her stand and made their way over to her. Applejack turned around as she heard their approach.
“Well, howdy there, partners! What can I do you for?”
Spike eyed the food goods hungrily whilst Twilight scanned Applejack’s stock and stated, “I guess just the usual, one apple pie and an apple tart.”
“Alrighty then! That’ll b- Twilight-” Applejack raised a hoof, pointing behind Twilight, “-what in the hay is that?”
A loud crack and followed by a boom resonated through the marketplace. The market was lit up in a brilliant light and the ground trembled.
Twilight and Spike both turned their heads only to see another flash and a bright circular light about the size of an orange appear in the distance. The three of them shielded their eyes against the luminous light. Twilight squinted under her hoof towards the light. She took a few steps forward to get a better look.
Above the light, a shadowy bipedal figure shook and bounced as it curved it’s body backwards. Twilight stopped and squinted her eyes to block the enlarging light.
“What is that…?”
Applejack spoke up from behind her stand, “I don’t know, but- It’s coming right at us!”
She jumped out from behind her stand and to a visibly safe piece of the marketplace. Spike grabbed Twilight by the end of her tail and tried dragging her away from the approaching blinding light.
“Twilight! We have to get out of the way!”
Twilight sat still, staring at the blinding light.
Spike fruitlessly attempted to drag Twilight away. A loud, shrill sound filled the air, Choo choo!
A stallion tackled Twilight out of the way and Spike followed behind, still holding on to her tail. Twilight and the stallion hit the ground with a soft thud and rolled over onto their backs.
The glint of sunlight reflecting off the object revealed it to be metallic. A loud cackle accompanied the blasting sound of whistles.
Twilight’s eyes widened in terror upon realization of what it was, “It’s a train!”
“All aboard! Ha ha ha ha ha ha haaa!”
Chugga chugga chugga chugga, choo choo.
Rail tracks magically appeared on the ground in front of the train.
The train tore through Applejack’s stand and plowed through the buildings behind, decimating everything in its path. As the train destroyed its first home, the figure standing on top had leapt off the side and landed next to speeding contraption.
The shadows subsided to reveal a man. The man in question donned a marvelous matching black suit and overshirt, underneath of which was a white undershirt and silky black tie. Above everything else he was clad in a smooth, black duster. He wore leather gloves and on top of his head laid a conductor's hat with a small label on front, “A-train8.” To top off his appearance, the man stood with a golden cane held by his left hand.
Twilight pulled herself off the ground and senselessly ran up to the man. Her horn illuminated with a purple glow as she confronted him.
Twilight scrunched up her nuzzle and scolded him, “Who are you!? And what do you think you’re doing?!”
She chose a defensive stance with her front half bent down with a snarl on her face, which evidently left her hackles raised and her tail bristling, like a cat.
Click. Click. Click. His cane tapped on the stone road as he strolled to a position in front of Twilight.
He placed his weight on his cane as he bent down and spoke with a lunatic’s smile on his face, “I’m The Conductor. Where is your tallest building?”
He held his free hand up to his forehead and parallel to the ground. He eagerly looked at the town around him, searching for the tallest building. Beneath his hat, his black hair stuck out, having no rhyme or reason. His eyes were wide open, showing off his lack of irises.
Twilight wavered slightly at the close-up of his face, but pressed on. “You can’t just destroy houses! You’re going to fix this!”
The Conductor stood fully erect once more and scanned his surroundings. He spotted a giant crystal tree and pointed to it with a gloved hand. “There!”
His cane clicked against the ground as he left Twilight both infuriated and speechless. He strode up to the train tracks and stuck out his arm. The ponies turned back to where the original train had appeared as the sounds of a horn neared them once again. A second, identical train to the first, whooshed by.
The conductor grabbed on to a bar protruding from the side of the train and pulled himself up. Placing a foot on the side of the train, he held his cane up as the train sped past the ponies. The train derailed itself from its predecessor’s tracks and new tracks emerged to create a direct route to the tree that The Conductor had spotted. This in turn caused ponies to jump out their windows and scramble to get away as the train plowed through their houses.
Two more trains emerged, the former followed the original in it’s track of destruction whilst the latter stopped in the middle of the market. The doors to the passenger carts opened, revealing a bunch of sad Chinese men as they left the train with their heads down and shoulders slumped.
The first one to exit held a clipboard and wore a yellow construction helmet. Twilight angrily stomped over to him.
“What’s the meaning of this!?”
The man looked up from his blank clipboard and sighed, “I… I don’t even know.”
Twilight’s right eye twitched and she stomped back over to Applejack and Spike. Applejack took off her stetson and held it over her chest.
“What are we going to do, Twilight? I don’t think we can stop him.”
Spike simply stared in awe at the smoldering wreckage that was The Conductor’s first victim; Carrot Top’s home.
Twilight snarled, “We will stop him! We will not stand for his destructive behavior! Follow me!”
Twilight started trotting away and Applejack followed behind, but had to turn back and get Spike’s attention. She shook him out of his stupor and the two of them trailed behind Twilight.
The three of them reached Twilight’s castle, however, they were not alone as the majority of the town joined in along the way. Twilight led the front-line up to the front of her house where The Conductor stood on the balcony.
He stood with his arms crossed, his cane still held in his left hand. Ponies yelled and screamed from below him. They insulted, questioned, and complained.
“Who’s going to fix my house!?”
“Why are you doing this?”
“I hate you!”
“What are you?”
“Celestia will banish you to the moon!”
The Conductor held up his right hand and silenced the crowd.
He smiled eerily and stated, “No gods. No kings. Only trains!”
Twilight’s face was laced with confusion and anger as she asked him, “Why?”
In response, he spread his arms out into the air above him and declared, “Trains! Trains everywhere! A utopia of trains!”
A pegasus stallion, Thunderlane, angrily waved his hoof at The Conductor.
“We don’t want your trains you madman!
“Shut up, you!-” he rubbed his chin in thought for a moment, “-How about this? To make this fair, I’m now selling stock in my company. That way if you have the majority, you can decide whether or not your measly houses will be destroyed.”
A chorus of cheers spread through the crowded clearing. That was until Thunderlane spoke up again, “Wait- so we are paying you to not destroy our homes?”
The Conductor smiled, “Yes!”
The crowd was upset once more with the coming of this new realization.
“That’s not right!”
“You’re a terrible pony!”
“Go buck yourself!”
The sound of glass breaking resounded through the town as The Conductor brought his golden cane down on the crystal railing.
“Sold! To the man with the trains!”
Looks of blatant confusion was evident on the crowd’s faces as he proceeded to explain.
“I have bought all of the stocks! Prepare for trains!”
A voice spoke above the rest, “That’s not fair! We had no time!”
A small hole appeared in the crowd as they parted to let Mayor Mare confront this menace.
“You cannot do this to us!”
She turned around and gazed upon the crowd, “Let’s stop him!”
The Conductor reached beneath his overcoat and pulled out a train whistle. He brought it up to his lips and blew into it. A high-pitched tone played as the crowd stared at him silently.
The Conductor stopped blowing into it and put it back in his coat. Ponies started looking at each other, asking silent questions they knew they could not answer, but asked anyways.
Twilight looked up at him, “Wha-”
“This is your last stop!”
Choo choo!
A shrill scream pierced the air as a bullet train fell from the sky and smashed itself into the ground where the used-to-be-mayor Mare was standing. The train stood vertically straight, with the nose embedded into the ground, like a tower.
The crowd gasped and screamed as they attempted to scramble away.
The Conductor had a smile on his face as he took a step away from the railing.
Twilight snapped herself out of her shock from watching the incident and yelled to the crowd, “Stay calm everypony! Follow me!”
Thunderlane and Blossomforth jumped off the ground and took off towards Canterlot.
Blossomforth screamed, “Buck that! We’re out of here!”
Thunderlane stopped and turned to Twilight, “Ye-”
He was cut off suddenly by a flying freight train that struck both him and Blossomforth from the air at seemingly lightspeed. He released a blood-curdling scream right before the two of them became nothing more than a fine mist in the air.
Ponies cowered at the train that soared over them. Twilight’s jaw dropped and her eyes widened to plates, “Nopony fly!”
Twilight ran through the crowd and once again led them as they ran through Ponyville, desperate for safety. But even after they left earshot of the madman, Twilight could still hear his maniacal laughing in her mind, taunting her.
They reached the town hall and the crowd streamed inside. The inside of the building was a large auditorium in which the town meetings were usually held. Twilight and Applejack made their way towards the back of the auditorium and up to the stage.
On the way, they passed a stallion holding himself in the fetal position on the floor.
“We’re so bucked… We’re soooo bucked…” he whispered to himself.
He then burst into tears and continued repeating it to
himself whilst tears streamed down his face. Twilight grimaced at the sight and continued forward. She and Applejack climbed up the small set of steps to the stage when they were passed by a mare pacing back and forth mumbling nonsense to herself.
Applejack stopped and turned to Twilight. “Twilight, do you thin-”
“Oh no! Where’s Spike!?”
Twilight searched frantically around her. She scanned the Ponyville crowd and sighed in relief when she saw the familiar color of his scales and spikes over by the school kids.
She turned back to Applejack, who had a disappointed frown on her face. Twilight smiled weakly, “Sorry.”
Applejack cleared her throat, “Okay. As I was saying, I hope everypony else is fine. The other girls I mean. I hope Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy didn’t try to fly away. I’m not sure if those trains will hit us every time we try to fly, but we might as well be safe and not try.”
Twilight nodded in agreement. “I was thinking the same thing.”
“Look out here, guys!” Lyra called from a nearby window. Twilight, Applejack, and a few of the more curious ponies trotted over to the window and peered outside. In the middle of the road was a single piece of track. On top of the track was a single train, slowly moving back and forth. Seemingly going nowhere.
Their heads turned left and right as they stared at the ever-moving train.
Lyra spoke up and interrupted their thoughts, “I turned around for one second and boom! It just appeared out there! It’s like it materialized out of thin air!”
Applejack turned to Twilight, “Twilight, you have to write a letter to the princess!”
Twilight nodded and stepped away from the window and searched for Spike in the crowd.
“Spike! Take a letter!”
-----
The Conductor was sitting in a black leather chair staring at the wall. He held his arms out in front of him, the tips of each finger touched with their partner on the other hand. His hands formed a pyramid as he contemplated the wall.
Footsteps echoed through the room, originating from the entrance. He spun his chair around and faced his visitor.
A lanky Chinese man stood at the door. The man took a few more steps and stated, “Sir, we’re out of tracks.”
The Conductor waved a dismissive hand, “Use different types!”
The man hesitated, unsure of what to say. He finally decided to speak after a long moment of contemplation, “Sir, we can’t do that. I-It doesn’t work that way, sir.”
The Conductor shot up from his chair and stared down the man, “You dare tell me what I can and can’t do? Be gone with you!”
He smacked the man in the face with the butt of his cane. “Be gone!” he yelled once again.
The man stumbled backwards whilst holding his nose and he left the room as quickly as he could. In his absence, another Chinese man with a yellow hard hat on took his place.
“Sir… we’re bankrupted.”
A smile edged its way onto The Conductor’s face before he stood up and gave the man a hug.
“Gooooood.”
The man was visibly confused, “Sir, I don’t understand. Why did you send all the money you used to buy your own stocks to Russia?”
“Exactly!” The Conductor said as he released the man from his grip. He turned to the balcony door and walked out. Smoke and flames poured out from destroyed buildings. Most of which collapsed after a train had plowed through them. The entirety of Ponyville was a train yard.
Some trains were still as they did not have any tracks to move on. Others moved back and forth over what little track they had. Occasionally, an explosion would erupt from a random building as a train would smash through it, destroying the foundation.
He raised his arms into the air and cried out, “It’s beautiful! An army of trains!”
The man still standing in the room behind him spoke up, “Sir… please; It’s not an army if the trains can’t mov-”
“Shutup, you!”
The Conductor strengthened his grip on his cane and put his other hand on the balcony rail. He placed the hand holding the cane on top of the rail and pulled himself onto it. He climbed up with ease and was standing on top of the crystal railing.
“Sir, what are you doing?” The man behind him asked as he pondered pushing him off.
He started to creep forward at the assurance coming from his thoughts, ready to push The Conductor.
He was almost to The Conductor when in a sudden turn of events, The Conductor bent his knees and leapt off of the railing. The man ran up to the railing and peered over the edge.
The Conductor’s falling body slammed into the back of the bullet train below. His weight unbalanced the tower, which caused the tower to lean. He slid off the top and face planted into the ground. His fall was followed by the tower giving in to gravity. It promptly fell over and landed on top of him.
The Chinese man with the hard hat turned around and screamed into the castle, “He’s dead! We’re free!”
A worker’s head popped into view. “What he say?” he asked another worker.
“We’re free! He’s dead!” the Chinese man yelled again.
“We’re free?”
“Yes, we’re all free from the madman!” He plucked off his hardhat and threw it into the air in celebration.
A chorus of cheers erupted inside which was then followed by the workers running out to the balcony. They all hugged each other whilst chanting, “We’re free! We’re free!”
The man that had thrown his hard hat turned back around to observe of the machinations of the very trains that his forced-employer worked with. He peered over the edge expecting to see where The Conductor was squished.
His smile vanished when he spotted The Conductor nonchalantly brush off his overcoat and stroll into the town.
He bent down and picked his hard hat back up, “Well… shit.”
Another worker saw The Conductor walking away, and he too fell deathly silent. Soon, the whole balcony was absent of any celebratory noise.
A worker spoke up, “You lied to me.”
-----
Click. Click. Click.
The Conductor’s cane rapped against the cobblestone road and he whistled a merry tune as he strolled over to the town hall.
“Choo choo choo,” he whistled.
Before he approached the front door, he looked to his side and admired his fine work. One of his many trains sat still on its only piece of rail. A beautiful sight, frozen in time.
A smile crossed his face as he knocked on the door. Murmurings could be heard from the other side. The voices fell silent as the sound of hooves hitting the ground grew louder.
The door cracked open and Twilight poked her head out. She gasped at the sight of The Conductor and tried to silently close it shut, hoping he didn’t see her.
“Twilight?” Applejack moved closer from behind her. “Who is it?”
“Shhh,” she whispered.
A loud crack resounded through the auditorium as a fist-sized section of the door splintered. Screams echoed as the ponies spotted a gloved-fist protruding from the door.
The Conductor’s fist unfurled and he stuck the rest of his arm in and found the lock for the door. With a swift motion, he unlocked the door and his arm retreated back through the hole.
The ponies watched in a combination of horror and shock as the door knob turned with a click and he strode into the room. He looked at the ponies and proudly stated, “Good news, everyone! I’m bankrupt! Enjoy your utopia of trains!”
He turned back around and as he walked through the doorway, he threw his hands up in the air with a flourish whilst still carrying his cane.
“Trains everywhere!”
“Wait!” Twilight yelled, “What about Ponyville?”
The Conductor began to whistle as he continued to walk out, ignoring Twilight.
The ponies stared at him as he simply walked away.
Twilight’s expression hardened. “Get back here!” she hissed.
She soon found herself running through the doorway to follow him, but she stopped her chase when she saw that he had halted to stare at something.
“Hey! This is fun!” Twilight heard a familiar voice say.
She turned her gaze towards the voice and spotted Pinkie Pie jumping up and down on top of a train as if it was a trampoline. Surprisingly, reality warped as the metal construction stretched and retracted. Completely oblivious to the laws of physics.
The Conductor took his hat off his head, held it to his chest and gave a bow. “Ah! There she is!”
Pinkie waved back as he slipped his hat back on. “Hey Mr. Conductor Guy!”
Twilight’s jaw hit the floor. “You know him!?”
Pinkie rolled her eyes. “Of course silly! Who do you think let him in?”
A stallion watching from the doorway screamed, “You let this madman in!? What is wrong with you!”
Pinkie’s face turned to a frown, but it quickly lit back up as The Conductor spoke, “Thank you, Pinkie. For showing me this wonderful dimension!”
He bent forward, placing his weight on his cane and then held up his right index finger.
“And one more thing, I almost forgot to give you this.”
Twilight watched as The Conductor reached behind his back and pulled out an impossibly large chest. With one hand he moved it to the ground and unlatched the front. He stepped back and motioned with a hand for her to open it.
“This guy would give Discord a run for his money…” Twilight thought in awe.
Pinkie bounced off the train and to the front of the chest. She used her muzzle to lift the top of the chest. She opened it with ease and scanned the contents. Inside was Thunderlane, Blossomforth, and Mayor Mare. All of them crammed together in what can only be described as a very uncomfortable position.
“Sillies! This isn’t the time for Twister!”
Twilight stood shocked at the turn of events. The ponies inside the chest tried futilely to get themselves out. The Conductor stepped around the chest and waved to Pinkie.
“Well, it’s been fun, but I have to run!”
Twilight bounded after him, “Wait! You have to fix all of the damage!”
The Conductor held a hand out in front of himself. Twilight stopped beside him and glared at him.
Lyra spoke up from the increasingly large crowd at the doorway, “You can’t just leave!”
“Goodbye, passengers!”
The train that Pinkie had bounced on rocketed forward off of it’s rail. The Conductor grabbed hold of a ladder rung on the side of the train and pulled himself to the top of the train.
The train sped off into the distance, smashing through another home and once it reached the other side, a bright blue light flashed. The flash caused the ponies to turn away and shield their eyes. In the place of the train was now a luminescent, light-blue portal.
Derpy stepped out of the crowd and next to Twilight and whimpered, “That was my house…”
Without warning, a horde of Chinese men passed by, somberly following their employer. Pinkie waved to them, but they did not seem to notice, as the majority of them were staring at the ground with tears dripping onto the ground below them.
They walked on the destructive path The Conductor left behind. After they all walked through Derpy’s house, it exploded into a raging inferno, causing the men to sprint in fear away from the fire and into the portal.
The portal collapsed into itself and closed. Once and for all.
After of silence, ponies ran from the group to look around the town to see if their houses still stood. The disarray of the town was forbidding to them as they searched the rubble of what was once their homes for any surviving possessions.
Many ponies declared it a futile attempt and simply laid on the ground, not knowing what to do with their lives. Twilight walked down the road, watching as ponies cried at the front steps of their burning homes.
She stopped when she reached a plank in the road. A brilliant flame danced on the surface of the cracked wood. She sat on her haunches in the middle of the road and watched it.
Recounting the day’s events, her expression melted away into a saddened frown as she stared into the flames.
-----
Celestia eyed the smoke rising from Ponyville. She watched whilst her carriage approached the small town. As they got closer, she was able to make out objects constantly moving back and forth in the place of flattened buildings. Namely, trains.
She spotted Twilight sitting in the road in front of a fire.
She pointed a hoof at Twilight and yelled, “Down there! Now!”
The Pegasi guards obeyed and brought the carriage to a halt beside Twilight. Celestia then walked out of the carriage and up to Twilight.
Her student was visibly scarred from whatever happened and so she asked, “Twilight, are you alright? What happened? Your message was very vague.”
Twilight slightly turned her head towards Celestia and peered at her from underneath her dirtied mane.
“The Conductor…”