To End a War

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The ground was red with blood. The sky hazed with a black smoke from countless blazes tearing asunder a land that was once green with life. Death had a stench that could be sensed for miles. Zebras and Griffons alike lay lifeless on the fields of what used to be farm land. Screams of agony and suffering resided through the landscape as officers on both sides did damage assessments. One Zebra general braved the sea of death. He was decorated in full uniform, with medals all across his front. A helmet with two stars capped his head and an entourage of junior officers followed in his wake. He wore a pistol on one side of his belt and a bull-whip on the other. His presence struck fear in any enemy his troops faced. He was fierce in battle and his soldiers had intimate respect for him. For this general, war was his life.

As his hooves connected to the ground, so did his mind connect to what had just happened. The battle was over, but the war seemed endless for him. He was losing too many troops and too fast. Even though his campaign against the griffons had technically been successful, no officer who lost this many soldiers would consider it a victory. The griffons fought too relentlessly for the Zebras to ever have a true victory: with no Zebra deaths.

As the medics finally arrived to the scene, some of his men finally caught a glimpse of hope. Their leader, however, knew that no hope was to be found here. More would die if he didn't do something.

He finally made his way to the epicenter of where the battle raged on a few hours ago. It was truly a nightmare. Machinery and weapons broken and smoking. Bodies lay in heaps and pseudo-graves being dug by survivors. He stood there in silence, watching the blood seep onto his freshly shined boots. The blood that he caused to be spilled. He looked to his aid and said,

"Get me Celestia."

War might have been raging in a far away land, but Equestria was untouched by the ravages of violence. In fact, Equestria hadn't been at war in hundreds of years.

Which is exactly why both sides asked Princess Celestia to come and try to make peace with the stubborn nations. Mediating peace talks was an honor only given to the wisest leaders in the world and Celestia did not take such an honor lightly. She would represent peace and amnesty, and maybe teach a lesson to the more... barbaric nations.

She could imagine herself going to the talks and forcing the two nations into peace, much like forcing two bratty foals into sharing toys. She would wear her regalia to represent the refined qualities her nation possessed. She would refrain from yelling and only talk in a smooth, calm tone. She would be an example to the other nations of what a true leader acted like.

Whilst she sat in the day courts listening to two ponies dabble on a matter that no one cared about, Celestia felt a smile coming upon her face. She caught it just in time before the expression took over. Usually nothing made her so wild and giddy, but this was special.

This is going to be good, she thought.

No matter the outcome of the talks, Celestia would look good. If they made peace, they would see her as a motherly figure who intervened on their behalf. If they went back to fighting, she could cast her legendary disappointment upon them. If the leaders went to arms in the talks, she could disarm them with her magic. In fact, she could show that new Griffon leader that Celestia would hold her own in a 1v1 duel. That could knock that giant chip off of the Griffon's wing. Of course, hopefully it wouldn't come to that.

But being the most powerful thing alive did kind of negate any anxiety towards fighting, so she would be fine.

No, she thought. This will be perfect.

This DID however leave a problem for the great Sun Goddess. With her gone for possibly weeks, she needed to find a pony that could keep the kingdom running while she was gone. Now a few centuries ago, Celestia might have just picked her highest ranking general, or her top adviser.

However, a few centuries ago her sister was still on the moon.

It would be a dishonor to not have Luna run the kingdom... right?

Suddenly that smile wasn't fighting for room on her face anymore.

A knock sounded off at Luna's door. Still sleeping, Luna tossed in her bed.

Another knock presented itself, this time a bit louder.

Luna groaned out, "Stargazer! Tis too early for such frivolities!"

The door opened and moments later a hoof poked Luna's shape in her bed.

With a giggly groan Luna complied with, "Alright then, Star. If you insist."

Celestia spoke out, "Luna, it's me. Stargazer is on vacation, anyways."

Luna, still completely underneath her covers, suddenly changed her mood. "Well now," she quipped. "This is most disappointing."

"Luna you were supposed to be up three hours ago." Celestia ripped the covers off of Luna's bed.

Luna took the covers with her magic and wrapped herself in them like a cocoon. "I shall leave this room when the Royal Body is ready to its fullest!"

"Luna," Celestia pleaded. "You know you won't be able to sleep when I'm gone! You acting like this just makes me worry."

"Sister!" Luna shouted as she peeped her head out from the cocoon. "How is one to function with no sleep for weeks at a time?"

Celestia's face fell into a disappointed slack. "I don't know Luna, I slept once per year while you were gone. It's not that difficult."

Luna eased her head back inside the linen shield. "Tis not our fault, is that?"

"Well you did try to kill me," Celestia droned. "So yes, it pretty much was your fault."

"Tis too early in the morn for logic, dear sister!" Luna whined. "I pray thee to leave us alone for five more minutes."

Celestia had enough of this and teleported both of them (minus the blanket/cocoon) into the throne room. Celestia landed herself right in her throne and smiled. Luna, however, landed about seven feet off of her throne and plopped right on the ground. Celestia saw this and stifled a giggle, then teleported Luna into her respective throne next to Celestia.

"Now Luna, you must learn to participate in the day and night courts when I am gone. You do a fine enough job with the night courts already but you can't just leave when you're tired or hungry anymore. You also can't teleport any pony out of the court when you don't want to hear them anymore. That's considered rude."

Luna shook herself out of a daydream and responded "Tia, please. Thou cannot believe the insolence we deal with at the night courts."

"I'm afraid I do believe, and understand," said Celestia. "There is even more of it in the day courts."

"More??. Impossible!" Luna yelled out.

Just then, a Canterlot noble entered the day court and demanded to receive more money from the Royal Equestrian Reserve because his neighbor had a bigger pool than he did, and he HAD to have the bigger pool.

Luna facehoofed with legendary force, while Celestia politely explained through detailed law why there wasn't a chance in Tartarus he would get free money.

"Now, Luna... are you sure you can handle this?" Celestia asked.

Luna opened her bleary eyes once more and pulled the covers off of her. It was clear she would not be able to go back to sleep. "Sister, we are not a small foal any longer. We are a grown alicorn for mother's sake. Continue with thy bag-packing lest you waste more time." She flopped out of bed and followed her sister into what would be Celestia's chambers.

"I know you're not a foal anymore Luna. It's just... you remember what happened last time?"

Luna's face went from beautiful with peace to angry and nasty in record time. Her eyes stared daggers, literal daggers into her sister's eyes. Or so she wished. "SISTER. THAT WAS OVER A MILLENNIA AGO. SHALL WE ALSO BRING UP THE CHOCOLATE CAKE INCIDENT OF 1283?? "

A swift look to the side from Celestia already gave Luna the answer she was looking for. "No, I guess not."

Celestia paused to give her brain room to think. It's true that last time Luna was in charge bad things happened. But Luna was true to remember that Celestia has had moments of weakness... even if it were focused on bakery products. That were TO DIE FOR. Still, Luna had a thousand years to grow on the moon and she seemed to have matured since then. Celestia was sure Luna could handle this.

"Or shall thy send us to the moon once more??" Luna quipped.

Ok, Celestia was pretty sure Luna had matured.

Celestia gave Luna a look of motherly disappointment and replied with "No Luna. I'm not sending you to the moon again."

Either way she couldn't really ask anyone else to do it. Cadence was busy with her own nation now. The nobles were about as useful as a five pound sack of fertilizer. Asking Twilight to rule a nation after she just turned alicorn was asking for disaster. It was similar to going to Joe's Famous Taco Stand in Canterlot: It was famous for the massive and epic diarrhea it caused, every time. After a moment of self-query, Celestia decided she would rather have the diarrhea than a rioting kingdom.

Which said quite a lot, since Celestia wasn't the biggest fan of diarrhea.

Still, the situation presented problems. While Luna was definitely an alicorn, thereby a born leader, she had a tendency to go a bit overboard. Not EVERY time, but it had happened more than once.

Celestia had confronted the fact that she would never be at true peace when she was away from the kingdom, no matter who was in charge. Trying to get Luna to understand that would be the hard part.

"Luna, what should you do if a rebel uprising takes place in the kingdom?" Celestia asked.

"We shalt smite them with great fury, as to make an example of them," Luna said with a smile, confident she had the right answer.

An unamused face from Celestia was plenty proof that she did not have the correct answer. "No, Luna. You contact me immediately and refrain from violence."

Luna's pout face pleaded at her sister. "Tia, please! We can handle such thing by ourselves!"

There was also the fact that she has yet to fully adjust to the new society and its new practices. Celestia would need to test Luna and make sure she wouldn't go too overboard with the old ways.

"Luna?" Celestia asked. Luna stopped her browsing through her sister's closet and gave her attention. "What would you do if a stallion cat-called at you?"

Luna's eyes faded into a dark red and her body slowly lifted itself off the ground with her black and blue alicorn magic. Celestia could feel the Royal Canterlot Voice charging up and folded her ears back.

"WHY, WE SHALT BURN THE OXYGEN STRAIGHTWAY OF HIS LUNGS AND PERCEIVE HIS LIFE TAKE FLIGHT FROM HIS BODY UNTIL THE BLOOD HIS MOTHER GAVE HAST BEEN COUGHED FROM HIS PORES."

Celestia felt her eye twich, then her ear followed suit.

It could have been a worse answer...

Lu(n)a Error

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Apples were a difficult subject. To most, it was just a question of how many and of what kind? Many could browse the market and just choose and color they liked and get a bag. Some just didn't buy apples.

To an intellect, however, apples were a subject of scrutiny. Some apples tasted great, while other apples only tasted acceptable. Some tasted great in pies, cakes, or other edibles. Some tasted best by themselves. Some were more sour than sweet. Some apples were perfectly round and small, while others were large and shaped like an up-side-down pear. However, all of them had a blue magic field around them when Luna moved them with telekinesis. Luna had found by way of trial and error that the perfectly round and small apples were best for stacking, and coincidentally cooking as well.

Because of this important scientific discovery, Luna found it only to be logical to outlaw up-side-down pear-shaped apples and require a size limit on every species of apple that would be legally sold in Equestria. Again, to the layman, this was a difficult process. There were political officials to contact and thesis statements to be written. The Academy of Healths and Sciences must take their greatest professors and conduct tests and give results to the Royal Hierarchy.

The great part of being Princess Luna was simply put, she was the Royal Hierarchy.

A call was made to the royal advisers to meet Princess Luna in the throne room. The younger advisers had dreamed of serving under the long lost princess. It was a task that had been missing since the lunar banishment. However, a heavy sigh escaped the lungs of the royal advisers when they were informed of the Night-Ruler's new law. One spoke up with "Some farmers will... disagree with this position, Princess Luna. Some might even protest."

The younger royal sister put a hoof to her chin. "No matter," she said. "this has often become the lesser minds' response to unbridled genius."

Enter Celestia.

What surprised Luna more than the lack of praise from the royal advisers was the response her own sister gave her. After hearing the idea, Celestia gave a motherly sigh and continued back towards her room. "Luna, please come with me." As the sisters left the throne room and the presence of others, they entered Celestia's chambers. Celestia went to continue packing her belongings for the trip.

On a regular day, Celestia might have found an elaborate plan for Luna to discover on her own why she can't ban certain apples. However, this was no regular day and she hadn't the time. This day was the day before Celestia went to the peace talks. Her head somewhere in a suitcase Celestia mumbled, “Luna, you know I can’t allow you to do this. You know that… right?”

The Sun goddess brought her head out of the luggage and stopped packing for a moment to look at her sister, hoping to drive her point home without the inevitable argument.

“Tia, we cannot allow you to hinder our social progress with the furtherment of the elite apple race. It is clear that the fruit with the round surface and small size are not only better tasting, more useful, but also better for stacking!!” Luna whined, throwing her forelegs in the air.

Celestia gave a swift hoof to her own face and kept it there for good measure. “Little sister, apple eugenics is not something we can get involved in. Our ponies now experience freedom of choice, which means we must allow them to eat whatever apples they want. Even if they want the… ‘inferior’ apples.”

“Come sister. Let me explain further.” Luna took the hoof of Celestia and led her to Luna’s room. Celestia didn't have the guts to tell her sister how insane the idea was in the first place, so she entertained her little Luna. Luna open the door to her chambers and inside the dark blue room were two stacks of apples. One stack was short, and consisted of the pear-apples. The other stack was far taller and consisted of the perfectly round apples. Luna pointed to the stacks and proclaimed, “Clearly you can see now. This short stack of apples is unacceptable. I will not allow my citizens to procure themselves with these hellion apples.”

“Luna,” Celestia pleaded. “You don’t understand. Although even I prefer the smaller, more round apples, we must allow our ponies to eat whatever they want. As long as they do not harm another by their choice, we must allow it; even if somehow it was best for them to only eat the small apples."

Luna cast a glance to the side. She knew the smaller apples were best and wondered why anypony would rather have a bulky, unstackable apple. "Tia, we art aware that this concept of 'freedom' is still quite fresh to our senses. However, why must we sit idly by whilst our subjects make the wrong decisions, when we knew the correct answer the time entire?"

Celestia smiled. At least her sister had good intentions.

"Celestia, we art still an anomaly in this world, are we not?" Luna asked with a serious tone. "It seems like only an fortnight ago, the royal alicorns were warriors. We spoke of the Warrior-Heaven and relished in the blood of our enemies. 'To live is to die,' we would exclaim to our troops."

Celestia stopped packing and sat next to Luna. "It's true, we were warriors. But Luna, we have progressed past those times. Senseless violence, especially against our own kind, is in the past. We don't have the 'to live is to die' mentality anymore. Ponies seek honor in life, instead of death. I know it's still difficult for you to grasp some of these concepts, but you'll understand how life is much better now than when we were always fighting."

Luna looked to her sister. "Tis true; our... process... understanding of current times have been onerous, laborious even. But we aspire, elder sister."

She pulled her little sister into a hug. "Luna, I know you just want to help our citizens. You have to understand that if we tell them all the answers to the questions they have and force the right decisions on them, they will never learn for themselves. You have to let them learn from personal experience." Seeing Luna a tad dejected, Celestia lifted her head up. "That doesn't mean you can't rule by example, and I'm sure this experience will help you understand our new society."

The younger princess looked at the floor for a few seconds, then Luna let a smile take over her face and gave a faux stomp on the ground. With determination she replied, "Thou art correct, dear sister. We shalt live and rule by example alone. They shall see the truth through their dark princess's life! Thank you, Tia. We thinks you have some more packing to do before thine departure. We shall leave you to such."

Celestia gave Luna a wink and left to go packing again.

"Okay Luna, what are the three rules?"

"No war shalt be created. Refrain of punishment in the capital degree..."

Celestia wearing her royal regalia and a scarf, had her five suitcases in tow while in the throne room alone with her sister. She trusted her younger sister to do well while she was gone, but a little quizzing might be able to put the Sun goddess's mind to ease a little more. She knew deep down that she would worry about the kingdom anyways, much like a mother would always worry about her child. However, it worried her even more that her sister had already forgotten the last rule.

Expectantly, Celestia replied "Aaannnnnnnnndddddddddd??"

"And..." Luna dejectedly answered. "And none of the outlawing all things we do not find amusing or acceptable. Ergo, no outlawing asymmetrical apple-fruits."

Satisfaction gleamed off of the white princess. "Right. Luna, I trust you to do right. I know you can do this. I won't be gone too long and I have complete trust in you."

That was a small lie. A white lie. A tiny lie. It wasn't like she didn't really trust her own flesh and blood. She just knew Luna might not be ready for the kingdom yet. She still believed in capital punishment, random outlawing, total monarchy, and she still used that forsaken Olde Canterlot dialect. Still, there was no choice now.

Maybe she wouldn't be that bad after all...

Celestia made her way down out of the throne room and opened the door. She turned around and said, "But if something were to happen, send a scroll through Fire Mail."

Luna was counting the seconds before her sister would shut up and leave. "Of course, Tia. We shalt be fine!"

They waved goodbye and Luna sat in her throne seat. After a few minutes of waiting patiently, she got up and plopped herself onto her sister's bigger throne. She spread her legs out and relaxed by sitting sideways by using the arm-rest and a head-rest. This is going to be great.

She pulled a hoof-file out of her majestic hair and began to file her hooves to perfection. While doing such, a castle guard entered the throne room and bowed.

"Your Majesty," he spoke. "Can I do anything for you?"

"Aye, guardsman" she responded. "Bring forth a cake; variety of which our dear sister has formed an infatuation."

The guard did not allow the smirk to appear on his face. "Of course, Your Majesty. Anything else?"

"There is, guard. What type of apple doth possess thine preference?" she asked with an evil smile.

Slightly taken back by the random question, the guard eased his shoulders to think. A few seconds went by, then he looked at his ruler again. "Honeycrisp, Ma'am."

She waved a hoof to dismiss him. "That is all, guard."

After he closed the door to the throne room behind him, he immediately took a pause to consider what had just happened. After a few moments, he went to the kitchen to place the order.

Luna In Charge

by AppleJared

To End a War

Lu(n)a Error