> My Little Background Pony: Party Hardly > by comicfan616 > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- > Flashing and Crashing > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- My Little Background Pony Party Hardly “So, Turner, I have a quick question,” Derpy said. She and Time Turner were inside the TARDIS. He was currently under the console, his hind legs sticking outward. “What’s on your mind, Derpy?” he asked. He held a foreleg out towards her. “Hand me the spanner, would you?” Derpy grabbed a tool off the console and gave it to him. “I’ve been wondering for a while; why does the TARDIS look like it does?” Turner didn’t answer right away, instead giving back the tool she gave him. “That’s a wrench, Derpy. The spanner’s the one that looks like a hook.” Derpy chuckled sheepishly and took the wrench. “What do you mean?” “You said when you first came here that you wanted to keep a low profile,” Derpy explained. She replaced the wrench and took what she hoped was the spanner. “But, a large blue box with the words ‘Police Public Call Box’ doesn’t exactly scream ‘perfect hiding spot.’” “Blame that on the chameleon circuit,” Turner replied. Derpy put the spanner into his hoof. “Ah, that’s better.” “The what?” “Chameleon circuit,” Turner said as he continued working. “Normally, on a properly functioning TARDIS, it allows the ship to disguise itself to fit in with the area and time period. Very useful for getting around with as little attention as possible. But… it’s not working properly. Like everything else here,” he added with an irritated sigh. “Did the Time Lords break that, too?” Derpy asked. Turner did say that his superiors disabled almost every function within the TARDIS. “Even if they could have, I doubt they would,” Turner said. “Despite Celestia’s intentions, the High Council wanted to break me utterly. They already took away my friends…” He paused at the memory. “Oh, um,” Derpy stuttered, “do you want to change the subject?” “No, no, I’ll be fine,” Turner said. “The sooner I get over that memory, the better I’ll feel in the long run. Anyway, they all wanted my exile to completely break me to the point of giving up my life entirely. Keeping the TARDIS’ chameleon circuit on would have been the final straw, with no way for anypony to see it for what it is, therefore giving me no temptation to get back to my ‘gallivanting and horseplay.’ In a way, I’m glad you found the TARDIS; I was already going to find a way to fix her, regardless of what they wanted, but you all really inspired me to pull through in a way that I doubt I could have mustered on my own.” Derpy chuckled, her cheeks a little red. “Um, you’re welcome, I guess. But that still doesn’t explain why the TARDIS looks like a blue box.” “That happened a long time ago. At the time, I was in Equestria’s future. You see, in about 80 years from now, ponies will have perfected the technology to communicate across long distances instantaneously. The police box design comes from a similar structure that allows one to use this communication technology, usually for emergencies. Well, the TARDIS is a temperamental old gal, and she seemed to really like the look, I guess. That’s the only reason I can think of anyway, because when I first noticed it, I tried to ‘fix’ the chameleon circuit, except everything I tried only made it worse. She’s been that way ever since.” Turner waited for an answer. When all he got was silence, he pushed himself out of the console and looked at Derpy. There was a glazed look on her face, like she was stunned speechless. “Um, Derpy? You all right? Did I answer your question?” This seemed to snap her out of it. “Hm? Oh, yeah. Yeah, um, there’s this thing in the future that looks like the TARDIS and the TARDIS decided she liked it and it involves being able to talk to ponies far away from you. Um, right?” Turner paused for a few seconds. “Well, there was a bit more to it than that, but—!” “Yeah,” Derpy interrupted, “but everything else you said was just big words and a bunch of stuff I didn’t understand.” “Oh, come now, how are you supposed to learn if you won’t let me explain things properly?” “Considering your teaching and explaining is like expecting foals to know Shakespony, I’m happy being dumb.” There was a small silence before the two ponies snorted in laughter, giving way to chuckling. “And this is why I like spending time with you, Derpy,” Turner said. “You really know how to liven up a mundane repair job. Speaking of which, could you get me a hex key?” He went back down under the console and waited until he felt something in his hoof. He lifted it to the area he was working on, but stopped. “Derpy?” he said flatly. “Yeah?” “This is a TARDIS key.” My little pony, my little pony, Ah-ah-ah-ah-My little pony! I had forgotten what friendship could mean. Until you all reminded me: Time together, rockin’ beats, Sweet experience, soothing melodies, All for one. Such an easy feat! Now thanks to you, my life’s complete! Yeah, my little pony! You are truly all my very best frieeeeeeeeeends! Turner tightened the last screw and pushed himself from under the console. “There. That ought to do the trick.” “Is the TARDIS fixed now?” Derpy asked. Turner breathed out something between a laugh and a sigh. “Far from it, unfortunately. This is just the first milestone. All we’ve managed to do is hook the TARDIS’ main power systems to the mainframe.” “Um, what’s that supposed to mean?” “The TARDIS is a complex piece of machinery and requires a ridiculous amount of power to even function. So far, all I’ve got is the emergency power, but all that can do is turn the computers on. The TARDIS itself requires something bigger, something that even some of the most advanced technology wouldn’t be able to handle. And, assuming we’ve done everything right, the power conduits are now in a complete circuit with the TARDIS’ mainframe, and that should give us a better chance to get her back up to full TARDIS…ness.” Derpy just stared at Turner throughout his entire explanation. “Um, could you simplify that a little?” Turner sighed. “Basically, we can bring the TARDIS’ central systems online and that should make the repairs much easier.” “Oh, okay. Why didn’t you say that in the first place?” “I’m going to ignore that,” Turner mumbled. He and Derpy walked up to the console. Turner stood on his hind legs and leaned his front half against the central tower. “What happens now?” Derpy asked. Turner smiled. “Just watch, and be amazed.” He brought his hoof to one of the levers and pulled. Suddenly, the panel he was leaning on violently erupted a shower of sparks. He stepped back in surprise and to get away from the assault. But it didn’t stop there. Sparks were flying all throughout the console, and even some of the outer walls as well. A loud and discordant humming noise filled the room and everything began to shake. Derpy tried to keep a steady footing, but everything felt like a high-magnitude earthquake, all focused inside the TARDIS. She tried flapping her wings, but her balancing problems meant she couldn’t find a suitable position to take off from. That and the sparks raining down on her and Turner dissuaded her from trying to fly to safety. Turner stumbled over to the control panel and pressed almost every button he could, looking more frustrated as his frantic actions went unrewarded. After countless fruitful attempts, he ducked under the console. He crawled along the ground looking up at the undercarriage until he finally found what he wanted. He reached a hoof up and pulled at the large wire, disconnecting it from the machinery and electronics. Almost immediately, the shaking slowed down to a stop, and the explosions of electricity ceased; all was quiet once more. Derpy, who had crouched close to the ground, slowly stood up, waiting for anything else to happen. When nothing did, she finally stood up at full height. “Are we safe now?” Turner crawled out from under the console and sighed. “We should be. I’ve disconnected the main power circuit. I just don’t know what went wrong, though.” He looked over the central tower. “I’ll need a bit to figure out what happened.” “Oh, okay,” Derpy said. She could feel Turner’s disappointment that their “first milestone” had instead become a sudden roadblock. She knew that he would need some time alone to think things through. “I better get going,” she said. “Hope everything works out.” She turned to leave, looked back at Turner for a moment, and walked out of the TARDIS and towards the door out of his basement. > The Best Laid Plans > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- With her mail route having finished a few hours ago and the disaster in the TARDIS cutting their repairs short, Derpy was left with very little to do, save sitting on a bench in Ponyville Park. All she could do was think about Turner. He had been working for weeks to get to this point, and the full repairs would likely go on even longer after that. But now his initial task blew up in his face, almost literally. Derpy had seen the disappointment in Turner’s eyes, and it was eating at her. She hated seeing him like this, or anypony, for that matter. “Hey, Derpy, what’s up?” Derpy was broken out of her mood by a voice accompanied by musical chords. She looked toward the source and found Lyra, holding her lyre with her magic. “Oh, hi, Lyra,” Derpy greeted in response. “Something on your mind? You seem a little out of it.” Derpy wondered if her state of mind was that obvious if Lyra could pick up on it. Regardless, she had a question to answer. She looked around the park for any nearby ponies and, once she was certain they were out of earshot, she said quietly, “I just got back from Turner’s. We were working on the TARDIS.” “Yeah?” Lyra said. “How’s that coming?” “It… could’ve gone better. Long story short, things didn’t work out as they should have. I think Turner’s feeling a little down in the dumps now.” “Wouldn’t surprise me,” Lyra said. “That stallion’s been working on that box for weeks, like it’s his personal mission or something. And you know what he’s like when it comes to his… current situation,” she tried to say as inoffensively as possible. “How close was he?” “From what I can understand, not too close,” Derpy answered, “but it was supposed to be a milestone. Now it looks like he’ll be set back a ways.” “Ouch.” “I just don’t like seeing Turner like this,” Derpy said quietly. There was a pause. “So do something about it,” Lyra suddenly said. Derpy looked up at her with a confused look in her eyes. “If Turner isn’t feeling his best, change that. You’re the Element of Laugher, for Celestia’s sake. Not mention his friend.” Derpy thought about what Lyra was telling her. She had to admit that just thinking about Turner’s depression wasn’t going to make it any better. If she wanted to make sure he was in a better mood, she would have to take matters into her own hooves. But what do I do? she thought. How am I supposed to help Turner forget this ever happened? It’s not like we can just laugh it off together like it was—! Something clicked inside her. Together, she repeated to herself. “Um, Derpy?” Lyra said. “Your eyes are drifting. More so than usual.” Derpy realized she was standing still silently for too long and shook her head to get her thoughts straight. “Sorry, Lyra,” she said, “I’ve just got the perfect idea.” Lyra looked at her expectantly. “What Turner needs right now is time with his friends. He needs to have fun to counteract the sadness. It won’t make him forget what happened entirely, but it should make him a little less gloomy.” “What do you have in mind?” “I was thinking a small party, just him, me, you, and the others. No reason to make a big deal out of it. Oh, and we’ll make it a surprise party, that way the happiness he feels will be more real.” “Sounds great. But where are going to do this?” Derpy opened her mouth, but no words came out. She had been so excited at finally helping Turner that she forgot the most important part: the details. Location was especially necessary to know almost beforehoof; no sense in inviting Turner to a party if he doesn’t know where it is. Derpy ran through several locations in her head, but looking at Lyra led her to one in particular. “Any chance Sugar Cube Corner might work? I mean, Bon Bon’s your roommate, so that might get us something, a friends-and-family discount, at least.” “I suppose we could try.” Lyra levitated her lyre onto her back. “Come on,” she said. The two mares galloped away toward the center of town. Turner pushed himself from under the console and sighed. He stood up and went to the main computer. He pulled up the diagnostics. “No other major damage,” he said to himself, “and all minor forms are little more than structural. I can deal with that later.” He sighed. He had been looking forward to getting the TARDIS to run on full power once more. It was like waiting for a friend to come out of a coma, except he had the ability, and the responsibility, to bring that friend out of said coma. As it stood, the TARDIS was just barely alive, still far from shutting down permanently, but not so far that the most it could do was open the doors on its own. (He still wasn’t sure what the TARDIS was thinking that night, though given what followed, he could hardly complain.) But after that explosion, Turner feared he might have done even more damage. He was still looking for the cause, trying to figure out what exactly happened in his repairs that might have made the circuits connect so wrongly to produce that kind of effect. And then there was Derpy. True, there was no way Turner could have seen this coming (prevented it maybe, but fixing TARDISes was never his strongest skillset). But she was barely able to stand as everything turned and tumbled; she could have really hurt herself, or worse. Having fixed the important stuff, Turner thought it would do him good to go out for some fresh air. Maybe I could find Derpy while I’m out, he thought. She did leave right after the explosion. I just hope she’s not too shaken up. He paused for a moment. I hate it when I make puns like that. Derpy opened the door to Sugar Cube Corner. The bell hanging just above the door alerted the only two other mares in the room. Sitting at one of the tables was Vinyl Scratch. She looked like she was interrupted from her conversation with the mare at the front counter, Bon Bon. “Good afternoon, Derpy,” she greeted. “Hey, Lyra.” The two mares returned the greeting. “Hey, ladies, ‘sup?” Vinyl added her own greeting. They nodded to her. “You working the counter again, Bon Bon?” Lyra asked. “Yeah,” Bon Bon replied, “the Cakes have a competition going on soon and I agreed to cover for them. So, what can I help you with?” “Turner’s feeling a little depressed right now,” Derpy explained. “His latest repair job… didn’t work out as well as he’d hoped.” “I take it it’s worse than you’re trying to make it sound,” Bon Bon said. “Not to sound offensive or anything, but why tell me this?” “We figured we’d throw him a little surprise party,” Lyra said. “You know, something to get his mind off things. And we were hoping we could do it here.” She finished with a hopeful smile, one that was copied by Derpy. “Today?” Bon Bon asked. The two mares nodded. Bon Bon, however, had a sad look on her face that was less than pleasing to them. “Look, girls, I’d really like to help you. And Turner is my friend as much as yours.” “I smell a ‘but’ coming,” Vinyl said from the sidelines. “The kind with one ‘t,’ not two.” “But I can’t help you with this,” Bon Bon finished. (“Called it!” Vinyl interjected.) “Why not?” Derpy asked, her disappointment evident. “First off, I’d have to run this by the Cakes, and they’d say the exact same thing. The fact is we can’t have the Corner occupied like that for so long without prior notice.” “But what about Pinkie Pie?” Derpy pointed out. “She’s able to get the place party ready in no time at all. No one’s ever complained about that.” “Here’s the thing, Derpy,” Bon Bon said: “it’s Pinkie Pie. Even we could stop her, she works so quickly and efficiently and takes care of everything herself that there’s really no point in trying. Not to mention that her parties tend to be more all-inclusive and actual celebrations. What you girls want, though, this looks like little more than a get-together between friends, something I doubt you’d want Pinkie for. So unless you can pull off a smalltime party setup in less than an hour, I’m afraid I can’t help you.” Derpy sighed. “Well, there’s that plan gone.” “Did you have a Plan B?” Lyra asked. “Well, we can’t do it at my place,” Derpy answered. “I want this just between us, and I don’t want my daughter to feel like she’s being left out.” “Our apartment’s no good either,” Lyra said. “Between the size and other ponies we have to share the building with, it just wouldn’t work.” Suddenly, a white hoof appeared between the two. Both mares followed the hoof up to a unicorn wearing sunglasses. “Girls,” Vinyl said, “say hello to Plan B.” > Belated Spring Cleaning > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- “You’re sure you want to do this, Vinyl?” Derpy asked. “I’d hate to impose on you like this.” She and Lyra followed Vinyl down the road to her house. “It’s not imposing if I let it happen,” Vinyl argued. “Besides, my pad is practically Grade-A party material.” “We don’t really have much else to work with,” Lyra reminded Derpy. “I know,” Derpy admitted. “It’s just that Vinyl kinda stumbled into it. I don’t want you to feel like you have to do something.” “Ditzy,” Vinyl responded, “like Bon said, you ain’t Timey’s only friend. Besides, Element of Loyalty, remember? It’s practically my job to go out of my way for my friends.” The conversation was cut short once they reached the front door to Vinyl’s house. She stood beside it like master of ceremonies. “Ladies and…” She paused when she realized what she was saying. “…ladies, I welcome you to Party Central, Equestria!” She used her magic to open the door. Derpy and Lyra looked inside. “Population,” Lyra said: “everything but the kitchen sink. Though I wouldn’t be surprised if it was just hidden.” In hindsight, both mares should have seen this coming. Vinyl was famous in Ponyville for two things: the playing and composition of loud music. Among her friends, however, she was known for something else: the largest mess outside of a pigsty. “Vinyl, when was the last time you actually saw the floor?” Derpy asked half-jokingly. “Eh, I’ve lost track,” Vinyl replied. Derpy was unsure if she was just making a smart-flank comeback or actually answering her question. The two continued to look at the mess. Various records were lying about. Papers with unfinished music scores had been crumpled and discarded. Food wrappers were absolutely everywhere. Derpy and Lyra shared an uncertain look. Finally, Derpy sighed. “We don’t have any other options.” “Yeah, you’re right,” Lyra said, defeated. “But if we are doing the party here, we’ll have to clean up.” “Wait, what’s ‘we’?” Vinyl asked. “You know what they say,” Lyra replied: “many hooves make light work. Or horns.” Her horn glowed and several records lifted off the floor. “Are you kidding?” Vinyl protested. “I have a system to this.” “Does that system involve watching where you step?” Derpy responded. “Face it, Vinyl, we need to walk in here. And I’ll bet you want us to dance to some of your music. A clear floor would go a long way.” Vinyl couldn’t think of an argument to that. “Okay, fine. But we do this my way; I still want to know where everything is after today.” “Deal,” the other two said together. Turner was barely paying attention to where he was going. He had no destination in mind, anyway, so he just wandered. That isn’t to say he wasn’t aware of his surroundings. He still paid attention to the other ponies around him, though this was mostly to keep from colliding with them. He was also on the lookout for Derpy. He still wanted to apologize for what happened back at the TARDIS. But in the time he’d been wandering, he hadn’t seen hide nor hair of the wall-eyed pegasus. It was always possible that her mail deliveries were over for the day, but Derpy wasn’t exactly a shut-in after work hours. Suppose it wouldn’t hurt to check, though. He turned and, hoping his memory was reliable, headed for Derpy’s address. “Where do you want these wires?” Derpy asked. She held a tangled mess of electrical cords in her hooves. “Just leave ‘em where they were,” Vinyl said. She held up a broom in her magic and was sweeping the empty spots on the floor. “I’ll want to use those later.” “Something I’ve been meaning to ask for a while, by the way,” Lyra said. “How did you get all your equipment? Electric appliances aren’t easy to come by, you know.” “Trust me, I know,” Vinyl said with a dry chuckle. “Took me more than three years to get the money for just the wiring. Took even longer for the amps.” “What does this do, anyway?” Derpy asked, holding up her cargo. “By hooking up all my stuff together with that,” Vinyl explained, “I can recharge everything at once without using up too much magic. A bit expensive, yeah, but a good investment in the long run.” “I’ll take your word for it,” Derpy said. She set the cords on the floor, in a corner with the wall where Vinyl had already swept. Lyra levitated a dustpan near the small pile Vinyl had created. The shade-wearing unicorn pushed the dust and grime into it. “Okay, that should do it for this half,” she said. She looked to the other two. “I think we can get the amps down here now. There should be a wastebasket up with them as well, so you can put the dust in there. I’ll just get started on this other half here.” They both nodded and went to the upper floor. Vinyl began sweeping when she heard a knock at the door. She froze slightly; she had no reason to assume Turner was here, but she didn’t want to be caught off-guard by his sudden presence and have their plans fall apart. “Who is it?” she called. “It’s just me, Vinyl,” she heard. The voice was decidedly not Turner. For one thing, Turner wasn’t female. The accent was similar, but far more classy. “Come on in, Tavi,” Vinyl said and returned to sweeping. The door opened and Octavia let herself in. She was wearing a pair of saddlebags, black in color. “I just came by to return the record I borrowed. I…” Octavia stopped as she looked around the house. Her eyes seemed to indicate disbelief. After a moment, Vinyl noticed Octavia wasn’t talking anymore and turned to her. “Um, Tavi, you okay?” “Vinyl,” she said at last. “Vinyl Scratch. Cleaning.” Vinyl finally understood and gave Octavia a bemused look. “Okay, Octavia,” the cellist said to herself, “no need to lose your mind over this. There’s obviously a perfectly logical reason as to why this is happening.” She paused for a second. “Yes, that’s it. It only makes sense. I’ve obviously been abducted by aliens and taken to an alternate dimension where Vinyl Scratch feels obligated to clean up her whole house.” “Ha, comma, ha, comma, ha,” Vinyl finally replied in a deadpan tone. “I assure you, Tavi, there’s a very good reason for this.” “I’d be very excited to hear it, Vinyl,” Octavia said. “Please inform me what possible excuse could ever make you actually want to clean up around here.” “We’re throwing Timey a party,” Vinyl answered simply. Octavia just stood there with a confused look on her face. Before she could speak again, however, a voice came from upstairs. “Hey, Derpy, are you sure you have this?” “Of course I’m not sure,” Derpy’s voice answered back, if a little strained. The mares at the door looked up and saw Lyra and Derpy trying to carry down one of Vinyl’s stereos. “But I don’t have much of a choice, now do I?” Lyra was higher up on the stairs, using her magic to attempt to hold up the top half; Derpy, meanwhile, was at the lower part, trying to keep the stereo from dragging along the ground. Even with Lyra’s magic, the two were straining to keep it up. Finally, the two reached the bottom of the staircase. Derpy gently set it down. Both of them practically fell over and panted hard. Lyra had herself draped over the stereo and Derpywas lying on her back on the floor. “Where… do you… want this?” Lyra asked between breaths. “Oh, come on, girls, it couldn’t have been that heavy,” Vinyl chided. “Easy for you… to say,” Derpy argued. “Ly and I have to lift it all the time,” Vinyl countered. “Well, it’s easier to do when the lifters are unicorns,” Lyra pointed out. “Um,” she looked down at Derpy, “no offense.” Derpy sighed. “I’ll take offense when I can breathe normally again.” Everyone was interrupted by a small cough, the kind used to get attention. They all looked at the door to find Octavia was still there. “Could somepony please explain to me what is going on around here? And why Vinyl’s house looks so… uncluttered?” (“Give it a rest, will ya?” Vinyl grumbled.) Derpy sighed. “Long story short, Turner tried fixing the TARDIS today and it ended badly, and now he’s depressed, so we’re throwing a surprise party for him to cheer him up and Vinyl offered to have it here.” She breathed in again as she still hadn’t fully recovered. Octavia took a moment to absorb the information she heard before saying, “Oh. Well, that makes complete sense. Thank you.” (“Told ya,” Vinyl muttered under her breath.) “Is there anything I can do to help?” Derpy wasn’t going to even try to argue this time. And if her ordeal with the stereo was any indication, she would need all the help she… they could get. “Okay, Bon Bon volunteered to bake the cake for this. One of us was going to pick it up, but at the rate we’re going…” “Say no more,” Octavia said. “I shall return as soon as possible.” She turned to leave. “Just don’t let Turner catch you,” Lyra said. “This is a surprise party, after all.” Octavia waved a hoof in affirmation and went down the road toward Sugar Cube Corner. “Welp,” Derpy said, “let’s get the rest of this stuff down here.” She pointed to the stereo. “I’m not going to move very fast tomorrow,” she added in a whisper. Suddenly, a pair of white saddlebags with eighth note fasteners plopped down in front of her. Behind that stood Vinyl. “Tell you what,” she said. “Ly and me’ll take care of the sound equipment. You go and get the rest of the food. Like you said, we’re running behind as it is.” Derpy smiled and placed the saddlebags on her back. As she walked out the door she turned her head back. “Oh, by the way, Lyra,” she said with a mischievous smirk, “remind me to smack you for that ‘two unicorns’ line.” She turned back and walked out of the house. Lyra stood where she was for a few seconds and said, “You think she was joking?” “Element of Laughter,” Vinyl reminded her. “Though to be honest, I’m not sure.” > Running Into Time > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Turner walked slowly up to Derpy’s house. He was still unsure of what to say to her, how his apology should sound. He was coming up on the door soon, though, so he didn’t have much more time to put together a full speech. In the end, he decided to forgo the longwinded approach and just say what he meant. It would have to do. Turner breathed in and knocked three times. The door didn’t open right away, though. After a minute or two of nothing, he considered knocking again, but he was stopped by a grunting sound, like somepony was straining herself. Is it really that hard for her to open a door? he thought. Finally, the grunting turned into a heavy exhale and the door opened. On the other side was not Derpy, as Turner had hoped, but a young filly who, with the exception of a horn instead of wings, looked almost like Derpy in every way. She was so young, she didn’t even have a cutie mark. Turner recognized the filly as Dinky Doo, Derpy’s daughter. “Hi, Mr. Turner,” she said. She sounded tired. “Sorry I didn’t open sooner, but I was trying to use my magic.” Ah, that explains it. “Not to worry, kid,” Turner said. “I can understand. We all need to practice whenever we can.” Goodness knows I had trouble piloting the TARDIS at first. “Anyway, I was hoping to speak with your mother. Is she in?” Dinky shook her head. “She’s still out.” Turner look surprised, not at Derpy’s absence, but at the fact that her daughter was left alone. “And she just leaves you here? By yourself?” “I’m a big filly now!” Dinky said, almost offended. “Mom trusts me to be by myself when she’s gone.” Well, she’s certainly not the type to get into trouble, Turner reasoned to himself. And Derpy wouldn’t leave her child alone if she didn’t think she could handle it. “Okay, well, thanks anyway, Dinky,” he said. “Do you have any idea where she might be?” “Got me,” she replied. “She’ll probably be in town, but that’s the best I got.” “I’ll keep that in mind.” Turner moved to leave. “Why do you want to see Mom, anyway?” Dinky asked him. Turner paused for a brief moment, never turning around, and said, “I just want to talk to her. Just as friends.” “Okay,” Dinky said, seemingly content with that answer. “See you.” Turner heard the door close behind him. He sighed at his current setback and walked back into the town square. Derpy slipped the carrots into Vinyl’s saddlebags. So far, she managed to get some apples, celery stalks, daisy petals, crackers, and some cookies (After all, what sort of party doesn’t have some unhealthier options?). She had been all over the market square looking for this stuff, but she was practically done now. She turned to see if there was anything else she could use; she still had several bits left over. However, she stopped and did a double take at the sight of a certain stallion. Turner was standing around, shifting his head around as though looking for something; Derpy could make a reasonable assumption that he was looking for her. Can’t let him see me, she thought to herself. She looked around and saw a suitable exit: an alleyway. She slowly walked toward it, hoping to escape Turner’s notice. Turner stared into the crowd, trying to separate the individual ponies in his mind. Even with her all-but-unique coloration, Derpy wasn’t easy to find when most of the crowd had a similar build. And that was assuming she was even here; Turner had no reason to believe she was actually in the market square. But he didn’t know anywhere else she’d be at the moment. He turned to scan another part of the crowd when something caught his eye. Against the myriad of colors of all the ponies, he was able to make out the combination of gray and blonde. He focused toward the direction he was looking and finally found her. Derpy was walking to the outer area of the crowd. She appeared to have a casual look about her, but Turner could tell she was feeling uneasy. The incident in the TARDIS must still be affecting her, he thought. He moved his way through the crowd, trying to keep his gaze on Derpy. She finally got out of the thickest part and started walking faster. Turner took a bit longer, but eventually, he managed to escape the crowd. He lost track of Derpy for a few seconds, but quickly found her again, heading for an alley between two houses. “Derpy! Wait up!” he called out. Derpy stopped suddenly, her wing flared out in surprise. But instead of turning around, she galloped into the alley. Turner was in shock for a second; whatever he thought the response would be, this wasn’t even last on the list. He regained himself and ran into the alley after her. There wasn’t much room to maneuver and few places to hide, so Derpy wouldn’t have been able to escape for long. He came to a fork in the path. I’ll admit, this is something of a pickle, he thought to himself. He looked down and saw hoofmarks leading to the left. Good thing the roads here are dirt. He followed the trail down the alleys. But suddenly, the trail stopped. There was no turning point, and Derpy was nowhere to be seen. The hoofprints just disappeared at a certain point. Turner stood there in surprise and, after thinking for a bit, hit his forehead with his hoof. Come on, Turner, you should know better than to think you could catch up with a pegasus! Ugh, why couldn’t I be something other than an earth pony this time around? He concluded his self-berating and focused on what just happened. Derpy heard me calling to her, and the first thing she does is run? What sense does that make? Turner thought about the possible implications of Derpy’s actions, but only came up with one. Does she…? Is she so shaken up that she thinks I’m…? Turner walked out of the alley with his head low. Derpy was thankful she saw the cloud she was now resting on. If she hadn’t, Turner might have caught up with her and forced her to answer some questions that she didn’t really want to answer. Admittedly, her actions back at the market were less than appropriate, but it was a spur-of-the-moment decision. For now, though, she decided to stay on that cloud for a few more minutes. After that, she would head back to Vinyl’s house, taking the back roads to avoid being seen by Turner until it was the right time. Octavia was not an impatient pony. She understood that not everything could come right away. She respected other ponies and did not demand too much of their time just because she had some task to complete. Knowing that didn’t make waiting for the cake any easier, however. “Bon Bon,” she said, trying to sound as gentle as possible, “not to pressure you or anything, but are you almost done?” “Just a few more finishing touches on the frosting,” Bon Bon said from the work station behind the counter. She held a frosting dispenser in her hooves, pointing it at a regular-sized cake; the entire cake was covered in blue frosting. “You know, balloons, lettering, all that good stuff. And could you try not to worry so much?” Octavia sighed. “Sorry,” she said. “It’s just that this is supposed to be a surprise, and I can’t help but feel that any minute now, Turner will walk through that door, see the cake, and know what we’re doing, and then everything we’ve done will be for naught.” “You really think he’ll be depressed if he finds out?” Bon Bon argued. “Of course not, but the way I see it, if he knows we’re throwing him a party, he’ll just feel like we did this because of him.” “We are doing this because of him,” Bon Bon quipped. “You know what I mean,” Octavia said, trying not to snap. “And done!” Bon Bon took the dispenser away from the cake. She picked it up from platter it was sitting on and carefully placed it in the center of an unfolded box on the main counter. Octavia was already there. “What do you think?” Bon Bon asked. Octavia looked at the cake. The edges were styled with ribbons of blue frosting. There were a few green and yellow balloons along either side, as well as thin, white words saying, “Cheer up, Turner!” “I think it looks perfect,” Octavia said. Bon Bon smiled and folded the sides of the box, tying it all with string to keep it together. Octavia turned to the side and let Bon Bon slide the box off the counter and onto her back. “I shall take this to Vinyl’s posthaste,” she said. “Thank you, Bon Bon.” “No problem. I’ll be along after my shift.” Octavia smiled and turned to the door. As soon as she opened it, however, she immediately closed it. A worried look crossed her face. “Something wrong?” Bon Bon asked. “Turner’s out there,” Octavia said. “And he’s coming this way.” “Oh, um…” Bon Bon started thinking quickly. “Well, you can’t use the back door; it’s against company policy, and the Cakes are back there working.” “So what do we do?” Octavia asked frantically. Bon Bon took a few more seconds to think and finally settled her gaze on the stairs to the upper floor. She turned back to Octavia and said, “I guess we have no other choice. Go upstairs. Pinkie’s already up there; she can help you get out.” “Why do you make it sound like the worst kind of last resort?” Octavia asked nervously. “Long story,” Bon Bon waved. “I’ll try to keep Turner here as long as I can. When you’re ready, have Lyra get in touch with me.” “Get in touch?” Octavia repeated. “Just trust me on this. Just tell her to call me and she’ll know what to do.” Octavia wanted to ask more about what Bon Bon was planning, but Turner was coming and her sense of urgency took over. Without another word she moved as quickly as the cake balancing on her back could allow. Bon Bon, meanwhile, continued standing behind the counter and acted as though nothing had happened. She stood there for a half minute until Turner walked into the shop. “Hi, Turner!” she said, trying to sound as natural as possible. “Oh, hello, Bon Bon.” Turner’s voice showed little emotion, but Bon Bon could still make out a hint of sadness within it. “Hey, uh,” she started, “are you feeling okay?” She already knew that he was supposed to be depressed, but thought it better to pretend otherwise. Turner just sighed. “Is it that obvious?” he asked. “Um, not really,” Bon Bon tried to assure him. “But I can still tell these things.” There was a small pause. “You wanna talk about it over a milkshake? On the house.” “No thanks,” Turner said softly. “I don’t want any favors.” “Okay, fine,” Bon Bon replied. “Friends-and-family discount, but that’s my final offer.” Turner sighed again. “I guess a drink would do me some good.” “HAVE YOU GONE MAD?!” a shrill voice yelled from outside. There was a very long and awkward pause between the two ponies. “What was that?” Turner asked. Bon Bon had a good idea. “I… wish I could tell you,” she said, hoping that didn’t sound too suspicious. I just hope Octavia will forgive me. She went to make Turner’s milkshake. > It's Party Time! > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- “How did I get stuck with the broom again?” Lyra asked, though without any real anger. Vinyl was lying close to the ground behind her music equipment, getting ready to connect the last cord. “Because Ditzy’s not here, we had to get my amps down here, and I have to hook everything up for the party,” she explained. “So basically, because you didn’t want to sweep anymore,” Lyra said. “You know me so well, Ly,” Vinyl chuckled. A knock at the door interrupted them. The two mares paused for a moment until Vinyl broke the silence. “Password?” There was a sigh at the other end of the door. “Vinyl, just let me in.” It was Octavia’s voice. “And you never even told me the password!” Vinyl’s horn lit up and she opened the door. As she stood up she said, “Give me break, Tavi. I’m just trying to make sure Tiiiiiii…” Her response slowed dramatically to a stop when she saw her friend; there were several pink splotches all over her coat and mane. She couldn’t be sure what they were, only that they looked… “Sticky” was the best word she could come up with. She looked at Lyra, who seemed just as confused as she did. “Um…” she started. “Nopony says anything,” Octavia interrupted, “nopony gets hurt.” “Could you at least tell us what happened?” Lyra asked. “Only that Pinkie Pie was involved,” Octavia replied frankly. “Now, if you don’t mind, I’ll just drop off this cake, take a shower (with Vinyl’s permission, of course), and never speak of this again.” “Upstairs, second door on the right,” Vinyl said. Octavia nodded her thanks and went toward the kitchen. “Oh, and you probably won’t have to worry about Turner dropping by,” she called back. “Last I saw, he was on his way to Sugar Cube Corner. Bon Bon said she’d keep him busy.” “He almost caught you at the Corner?” Vinyl said. “Would this have anything to do with—?!” “Drop it!” Octavia snapped. “At any rate, Bon Bon’s going to try to keep him there until we’re ready. She also said to tell Lyra to ‘call her,’ whatever that means.” She looked at unicorn in question at that last part. “Oh, that’s my comm spell,” she explained. “Something I found in high school. It allows me to keep in contact with any one pony of my choosing, and since she’s my roommate…” “Sounds handy,” Vinyl said. “Like I said, though, only one pony at a time. And it has to be a conscious link; I had to cast the spell with Bon Bon there to make it work in the first place.” “Eh, probably not for me, then,” Vinyl admitted. “Too many ponies to choose from to be practical.” By now, Octavia set the cake box in the kitchen and was on her way upstairs. “By the way, where’s Derpy?” “She’s out getting the rest of the food,” Lyra answered. “Come to think of it, she should have been back by now. The market’s not that far, and considering you had to watch Bon Bon make and frost a cake…” She was interrupted by a knocking sound. It didn’t come from the front door, however. After a few seconds, the knocking continued. “It’s coming from the back door,” Vinyl said. “You’re sure that’s not Turner, right, Octavia?” Lyra asked. “Positive,” Octavia replied, though her voice showed a little uncertainty. Vinyl walked, slowly but not so much, toward the kitchen and her back door. She lit up her horn and slowly turned the knob. She opened the door slightly and looked through the small space. She saw a grey coat and blonde mane and an eye that looked slightly off center. “Ditzy! We were wondering where you went,” she said as she opened the door fully, allowing Derpy to walk in. “Sorry I’m so late. I nearly ran into Turner at the market.” “Whoa,” Vinyl exclaimed. “He see you?” “For a moment,” Derpy replied. “Just barely lost him.” She sighed. “Although I’m not sure I did the right thing by running away from him.” “You’re trying to throw a surprise party for the guy,” Vinyl pointed out. “Acting all secret-like is just part of the gig.” “Yeah, but after what happened in the TARDIS, maybe he just wanted somepony to lean on.” Derpy bowed her head. Vinyl was silent for a moment, but finally said, “Hey, you know what I learned from being a DJ?” Derpy looked up at her, confused. “No matter what you do, there’s always going to be that one thing that makes you go, ‘Why the hay did I think that was a good idea?’ I’ve had my fair share of compositions that didn’t click with audiences, even though I thought they were gold at the time.” “Is there a point to this?” Derpy asked. “All I’m saying is,” Vinyl replied, “you never really know what’s a good idea and what’s not until after the fact, at which point, you just gotta keep movin’ on and do better next time. That make sense?” Derpy thought for a moment. Soon, she smiled slightly and said, “Yeah, I guess.” “Besides,” Vinyl pointed out, “once Timey gets here, it’ll more than make up for whatever disappointment he got through the day.” Derpy’s smile became wider and she put a hoof around Vinyl. “Thanks for cheering me up.” Vinyl looked a bit uncomfortable for a second and said, “Yeah, sure. So how about we work on cheering up Timey? You got the food, right?” With Derpy back and Octavia having finished her shower, the cleanup of Vinyl’s house and setup for the party went much quicker than before. Lyra and Octavia took care of the remaining dust and litter on the floor. Vinyl had finished setting up her music equipment and was going through some of her records, trying to decide what to play during the party. Derpy set up the main table and laid out the food she got from the market, as well as the cake Octavia brought. After that, they set to decorating. Lyra and Derpy worked together to hang streamers along the corners between the walls and ceiling. Vinyl placed three confetti launchers above the door; Octavia was a bit upset that this would cause all the cleaning to be all for naught, but Vinyl pointed out that parties were not inherently neat affairs. And that, given Vinyl’s reputation, the cleanliness wouldn’t have lasted much longer, anyway. Octavia reluctantly agreed. Finally, the four mares stood back and admired their work. Everything looked perfectly placed. It wasn’t lavish, but it would work quite well for a gathering of six. “All that’s left,” Derpy said, “is the pony of the hour.” “Lyra,” Octavia said, “if you’ll do the honors.” Lyra nodded. She bowed her head and closed her eyes. Her horn lit up. “And then she just ran off,” Turner said after finishing off his milkshake. “I tried catching up to her, but trying to catch a pegasus is… well…” He sighed. “No, I think I get it,” Bon Bon said. “I think she hates me now,” Turner said softly. Bon Bon’s eyes widened. “What?! Turner, that’s crazy-talk and you know it!” “Then why did she run?” Turner’s voice never raised in volume. “She stopped when I called out to her, so she had to have heard me. But then she runs away? Into an alley, no less.” Bon Bon stammered for a brief moment. “Um… um… maybe she had something important to do?” She didn’t sound too convinced of her own story. “What could be so important that she couldn’t even talk to me for a few minutes? And why down the alley?” Bon Bon said nothing for a while. “Okay, fine, maybe I don’t have a good answer.” Turner just sighed again. “But that doesn’t mean there isn’t one,” she stated firmly. She put a hoof around Turner’s shoulder. “Look, I won’t claim to have known Derpy for very long. Hay, I doubt any of us knew her until you came to town. But from what I’ve seen, she’s a good friend. I doubt she would have left you behind unless she had a good reason.” Turner wasn’t sure if Bon Bon’s explanation was satisfying enough for him. However, he could tell she was trying her best to help him. And perhaps she knew what she was saying. Suddenly, a strange look crossed Bon Bon’s face. It was small, so slight that nopony could have noticed it, but Turner was sure he saw something. It was like she had something else on her mind. He didn’t have much time to wonder, though, because soon, she said, “Hey, tell you what? I was going to go over to Vinyl’s pretty soon. You want to come with me?” Turner was confused by Bon Bon’s suggestion, both because of the activity itself and the timing. “What is she doing?” Bon Bon paused for the slightest moment before replying, “Oh, you know, she’s got some music she wants us to listen to.” There was something off about her answer, but Turner couldn’t place what exactly. “Come on, after the kind of day you had, you deserve a little fun.” “But what about your shift?” he pointed out. “It’s not over for another hour or so, right?” “Eh, we’ve had a slow day today,” she argued. “Still, I’ll just get Pinkie to cover for me. I’ll go get her, and we’ll head on over.” She didn’t wait for Turner to respond as she went up the stairs. Turner couldn’t help but notice that Bon Bon was acting kind of weird today. Unfortunately, reading ponies was never his strongest skill, probably less so than repairing a TARDIS. First Derpy, now Bon Bon? What is going on here? I mean Derpy I can understand, she was there, but Bon Bon just heard about it. Turner had a feeling that there was something else involved in everypony’s actions, but not knowing what exactly was killing him inside. “I’m not saying it isn’t possible, Pinkie.” Turner heard Bon Bon’s voice coming down to the shop. “I just never knew it could be used as a trampoline.” “That’s what everypony says at first,” a second voice, likely Pinkie Pie, said. Turner got the feeling he was better off not asking. The trip to Vinyl’s house was uncomfortably quiet. Bon Bon didn’t seem too eager to talk much, and Turner couldn’t come up with a fitting starting point to break the ice. If there was one good thing about this silence, though, it was that it gave him a chance to think about the day’s events, to try to make sense of everything. Ever since the explosion in the TARDIS, Turner had a strange feeling in his gut, one that was all too familiar: guilt. Ever since he started living in Ponyville, he had tried to rid himself of the memories of all the times he’d hurt somepony because of his carelessness. At first, he tried to distance himself from everyone, believing that the best way to not hurt ponies was to not form attachments. After he became friends with these five mares, however, he instead focused on the positive memories and determined to have his new life be just as positive, which seemed to rid himself of feeling the guilt even better than the previous method. But after the explosion, it all came rushing back to him. He tried looking for Derpy today to keep this newfound guilt from ruining his new friendships. But from the look of things, it failed miserably. Bon Bon seemed to think otherwise, but even she was feeling a little off around him. He could sense that she wasn’t trying to repulse him completely, but there was something in her directed at him. And he had a feeling that he would find out what was going on once they reached Vinyl’s house. Because Ponyville was not a very large town, it didn’t take long to reach their destination. Turner went ahead of Bon Bon and opened the door, standing just to the side. “Ladies first,” he offered. Bon Bon hummed in thought. “Actually, that whole ‘ladies first’ thing never made sense to me. You go ahead.” Turner stared at her for a moment. “Seriously?” “Hey, what’s wrong with a little variety?” she argued. Turner didn’t know what to make of this, but he decided that fighting over who went through a door first was a pointless, and downright silly, argument. He sighed and walked in. The entryway and living room were completely dark. The lights were out and the curtains on the windows were closed; the only light coming in was from the door, and with the sun shining from another direction, it wasn’t much. “What’s going on here?” Turner wondered aloud. Suddenly, he was blinded as the room immediately lit itself all at once. And if the visual shock wasn’t enough, the auditory shock was. “SURPRISE!” four voices shouted. A series of pops came from above him, as well. Turner finally opened his eyes and, beyond the confetti fluttering in front of his face, he saw his other friends. He mostly paid attention to Derpy, however, who was in front of the others. “Derpy,” he started after several seconds of stunned silence, “what is all this?” “It’s a surprise party,” she answered. “I can see that, but why?” “I just didn’t want you to feel sad after what happened today.” The gears started turning in his head. “You mean you…?” He paused. “I what?” Derpy asked. Turner gulped and said quietly, “…don’t hate me?” Derpy took a step back in shock, her eyes jumping away from each other. “What?! Why would you say that?” Turner sighed. “When the TARDIS… exploded, you could have been hurt. And when I saw you in the market, I thought you were running away from me.” “I was running away from you,” Derpy said, “but not because of that. I just wanted to keep the surprise party a surprise.” She walked up to him and put a hoof on his shoulder. “Turner, you’re my friend,” she said sincerely. “And it’ll take more than an accident like that to make me hate you.” Turner smiled a little at this. “Really? What would it take?” Derpy thought for a second and said, “I don’t know. Maybe if you blew up the planet or something…” There was another pause. Soon though, everyone in the room heard chuckling, which eventually became laughter. “Oh, Derpy,” Turner said between laughs. “you always know just what to say. Thank you.” He placed his own hoof on Derpy’s shoulder and pulled her into a hug. “Hey, Ly,” Vinyl said in the background. “Did you make pancakes?” “Pancakes?” Lyra repeated. “Why would we—?!” “Because we gotta do something with all this sap,” Vinyl explained. Turner and Derpy took this as a sign to let go. “Now that that’s outta the way,” Vinyl said, “let’s get this party started!” She practically flew to her stereo system and placed a record on the turntable. “Fillies and gentlecolt, for your listening and dancing pleasure, I give you ‘Wubstep Dishwasher’!” “That title makes absolutely no sense,” Octavia said. “Exactly!” Vinyl responded. She pressed the play button and the music started, playing a heavy bass and distorted melody that still seemed coherent. The five ponies were dancing and bobbing their heads, even Octavia after a few seconds. For the first time since the accident, Turner felt happy and extremely lucky to have friends like these. As he danced, however, he noticed a whiff of something… sweet. He turned to find the source of the smell and found himself looking at Octavia, who was next to him. “Octavia?” he said, trying to be heard over the music. “Yes, Turner?” “I hope you don’t mind my asking, but I was wondering why you smell like strawberry shampoo and…” he sniffed again, “bubble gum.” “NEVER AGAIN!” Octavia’s response was so loud, it caused the music to skip a beat. > Reparations > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Derpy had just dropped Dinky off at school. There was still another hour before her shift began, so she decided to go to Clockwork’s and check up on Turner. She was pretty certain he had gotten over his mood from yesterday, but she still wanted to know for sure. She made her way to the shop and knocked on the door. “I’m downstairs,” she heard Turner say. It was still just a little startling that he always knew who was where in his house, thanks to the camera technology he installed. Derpy got over her small shock (she was getting better at that) and walked inside. She went through the door leading to the basement and heard the usual construction sounds coming from the TARDIS. “Well, it looks like you’re back in the swing of things,” she noted. “After all that I went through yesterday, going back to this is like a vacation,” Turner replied. Derpy paused for a second and said, “So, um, how are you feeling?” She was now close to the TARDIS doors and could actually see Turner using a socket wrench on the console. “Much better. That party was the best idea you’ve ever had.” “I don’t know about ‘best,’” Derpy admitted slowly, “but yeah, I think it all worked out okay.” She stepped into the TARDIS proper. “But I do have one more question: did you really think I hated you?” Turner stopped working and, after an uncomfortably long pause, he sighed. “Derpy, when we met, I was already haunted by all the friends I’d lost or let down. That kind of thinking doesn’t go away because I let friendship into my hearts once more. So when I almost hurt you, that feeling returned. It was small at first, but when you were avoiding me, I let my emotions get the better of me. Nopony, not even a Time Lord, is immune to personal feelings and how they affect one’s thought processes.” “To be fair, I could have handled that better,” Derpy pointed out. “Hey, you know what? Let’s not worry about the past. It’s making the both of us a little blue.” Turner chuckled. “A Time Lord that doesn’t think about the past. The biggest oxymoron in the universe.” “Hey! Are you calling me a moron?” “No, oxymoron,” Turner defended. “It means…” He stopped when he heard giggling. “You knew what I meant, didn’t you?” “Just because I don’t have your vocabulary doesn’t mean I don’t know anything.” Turner couldn’t help but chuckle at that. “Well, if we’re going to think about the future, I think this will be a strong start.” He walked up to one of the levers on the console and pulled. Suddenly, the room lit up, not with sparks, but with actual lights. Going section by section, the TARDIS interior became much brighter than Derpy had thought possible. When it was over, she was able to see more details for the entire room from where she stood than she ever did before. She could see every button and lever on the console. She could see every dent and imperfection on the walls from the ship’s years of use. She could even see, for the first time, she noticed, entrances to hallways in the back of the room, meaning the box was even bigger than she initially realized. “Derpy Hooves,” Turner said, breaking her out of her amazement, “may I formally introduce to you… the TARDIS.” “You actually got it working,” Derpy said in awe. “After the party,” Turner said, “I was able to clear my head and focus better on what happened. Turns out I crossed the wrong wires. After I fixed that, the rest was foal’s play.” “Congratulations, Turner,” Derpy said. She went up to him and gave him a hug. While Turner did return it, he said, “Don’t congratulate me just yet. There’s still quite a lot to do.” “Just know that I’m always right here,” Derpy said encouragingly. After a bit longer, she let go of Turner and said, “Well, I gotta get ready for work. See you later?” “Of course.” Derpy smiled and went to the basement door. Turner was about to head out as well, but he turned back to the console for a brief moment and said, “Welcome back, baby.” Although there was no response, he could feel the TARDIS offer its own greeting. Fin.