> Chasing Twilight > by MegatronsPen > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- > I Must Have Her > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- I have fallen in love. I sought the end to which would reveal my happy ending with the positivity of a child. Instead, I am nothing more than a friend who is valued, cared for, and loved in other ways to what I want. So where is my happy ending? Where is it? It is not here, not in friendship. In stories, there are many outcomes that are written expertly to their intended outcome… There is a light at the end of the tunnel for a lack of a better phrase for many… Even the darkest of stories have a slither of hope to cling to so that there may be a sequel... But mine? If only my story was as thoughtful; so optimistic and intended for that happy ending to engage the reader into delving further into my story… So who is it? Who is that reader? Who is that observer? Celestia? Luna? Twilight or even Cadence? No. I am just a simple earth pony, who is in love with a mare, writing stupidly into her journal just to vent her frustrations. Am I misconnected? Am I that self-loathing that I take my family for granted? No. That is the answer in its simplicity. I love my family and they love me, but that is all they are to me. Family. Unconditional love. I know love surrounds me every day from my customers to my friends, but, never has once love found me, and made me theirs. Never once had love kissed me full upon the lips, and told me that my hard work has finally paid off. That my sacrifice… No. Not sacrifice. What is the word I seek to write, even though sacrifice is an accurate representation of my thoughts? Selfish abandon? Does that make any sense? I work to support others and supply the social and vital needs of the many; yet does that make me selfish in denying myself the simplicity of carnal desires? Does it make any sense at all?! Am I just crazy? I have battled with my own sexuality for so long that I had never thought to put it to paper. I had never thought that my mouth writing would reveal so much to me, and yet, raise so many questions I have fought within a turmoil of doubt and fear for so many years. I’m gay. I’m a fillyfooler. I hate that word. But I am that. So why do I feel so dirty when I am so brutally honest to myself? Should I not be happier that I can admit as much? I like mares! I like mares! I want to stuff my muzzle under her tail and do things I only dream of! I like mares! I love her! I want to tell her, with all of my heart. I love her more than the apples I buck from the trees and I love her more than sweet apple pie made from Granny’s own hooves... So why am I so afraid to say it? Why can’t I tell Twilight I love her? Because it’s wrong. She’s a Princess. We’re friends. She’s a mare too. It’s wrong. Applejack parted her teeth just enough to allow the pencil to topple onto the desk, her tear stained face turning away from her journal as she lifted a hoof to close it. “We’re friends. An' we will always stay tha' way,” Applejack drew her lips to the candle resting in its stick upon her desk, and blew it out to throw her room into perpetual darkness, “even if Ah want it to be more.” Slowly she cantered from her desk and headed to the bed, slipping into the covers from the bottom and slithering her way up towards the plush pillows. When her head met with the comfortable confines, emerald eyes glanced about her Spartan room, and simply regarded the crack in the ceiling where she noticed mildew had started to form. Applejack pouted, “Gonna need to fix tha’,” she muttered, “an’ fix my thinkin’. Who am Ah kiddin? Twilight an’ me? She’s one of those fruu-fruu Canterlot gals, an’ am nothing more than a mud pony. Nothin’ much, nothin’ else.” A slow blink caused Applejack to crack a yawn, a hoof raising up to rub at her sleep ridden eyes. “Ah should’a slept instead of…” She glanced from the ceiling, and flushed red, “Ah’m sick. Think’in of mah friends like that... But…” A hoof trailed down along her stomach, lowering with each inch, her body burning hotter than Celestia’s sun, “Ah can’t help it… Ah… Ah can’t… Ah…” She drew up her hoof before contact could be made with what she sought, and pressed it to her face, “What in tarnation is wrong with me? Ah’m a mare. She’s a mare… Isn’t that enough? Isn’t that enough to stop me?” Her eyes became dreamy, however, the more she considered what couldn't prevent her enough to stop her from… Touchin’… Feelin’… Kissin’… Ah’m sick. Ah’m… No. "Ah know it is wrong, and Ah know I was raised all proper like, but, Ah love her.” She quickly stood up on her bed, and then headed towards the journal, turning it open and frantically flipping through to the page she had inserted her recent entry. Drooping her head down, she plucked the pencil she had discarded with her teeth and wrote an added entry. No, it is not wrong. I have to find a way to make her mine. Celestia’s sun, Ah wrote that! I want to take her for myself. She’s far beyond my league, but I have to try. I have to make an effort otherwise someone else might steal her from me. I will not let that happen. I am going to battle for this feeling, and I do not care what my family thinks of me, or anyone! I’m going to win her heart, and feel her lips against mine. I am going to do everything I have ever masturbated to— Applejack gasped. Did she just write that? Ah did. The pencil dropped again from her mouth, her words whispering hotly to her lonesome room, “Ah need her. Ah want her. But how do Ah get a Princess to love on someone like me?” > She Drives Me Crazy > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Ah just need to go over to the library and then… And then what, AJ? Ya’ll hardly ever go to the library unless it’s to see Twilight about somethin' important or to meet up with some of th’ girls. Suddenly showin’ up unannounced jus’ might set Twilight on edge thinkin’ somethin’ is wrong. When there is somethin’ wrong. It’s me. Maybe… Ah jus’ show up for a book about fungi or somethin’? 'Cause of a mushroom which Ah’ve noticed growing on th’ trees at the orchard… An’ being the concerned and protective mare that Ah am towards my crop, Ah need to know about it to make sure Ah know it ain’t gonna ruin th’ harvest. Maybe that’ll work? Applejack suddenly placed a hoof to her forehead, sighing aloud in frustration as her emerald eyes dropped onto the display of her ripe fruity wares upon the stall she attended to, as a soul shattering self-doubt settled in, the more she over thought the idea. Who Ah’m I kiddin’?! That’s a poor excuse! That was a bad—no, terrible idea! Ah gotta think of something better! Somethin’ believable… Somethin’… “Ah don’ know…” Applejack whispered as she shook her head, “why in Celestia’s name is this so difficult?” “Um… Sorry?” Applejack stiffened as she directed her gaze up to her long forgotten clientele who stood awkwardly yet patiently opposite her, causing Applejack’s eyes to widen like saucers at the realization she had just fallen into an internal struggle with her own thoughts during a sale. “Ah’m sorry! Ah was miles away,” with a daft smile, Applejack flushed red, “what was it ya needed again?” Lyra blinked and pointed a hoof to the bag of apples upon the counter that the farm pony already packed, and seemingly forgotten about. “Could I... Pay for those? Hey… Look—um, Applejack, is something the matter? Because you have been kind of staring at me for a while now, and—” “Ah did? Ah was?” Applejack glanced aside in disbelief. Snap out of it ya’ll flea brain! Shift ya’ll flank and do your job! “Ah’m sorry, Lyra. Ah was really far away,” Applejack forced a nervous chuckle, “that will be… Uh'm… Three bits.” Applejack frowned as she questioned her response and visibly scratched at her head with a hoof. “Ah think?” “Um… But it says…” Lyra glanced to the large, glaringly obvious sign that was pitched right beside the stall, demanding a set price for a certain amount of apples. “Are you sure you are okay?” It was a stupid idea, AJ. Of course Twi’ would want to help out with the situation... An’ tha’ would eventually reveal tha’ Ah was lyin’ about the mushrooms and that’d put me in a righ' awkward spot. It makes sense. She would do anythin’ to help a friend… Maybe If Ah… No… This is stupid. The goin’ there to get a book excuse about fungi is out of th’ question, so… How do Ah get that first contact?! It is drivin’ me insane jus’ tryin’ to figure it out! Do I jus’ go over there, knock on the door and say, ‘Hey, Twi! Ya’ll know how much Ah’m lovin’ on ya, right? Why don’ we be a thing and be all lovey dovey. In fact, why don’t you jus’ turn around, stick ya’ll flank up into the air and let me show you what it is Ah’ve been aching to do since Ah—' “Applejack, are you sure you are okay?” Lyra leaned in, concern clearly written upon her face, “you’re sweating pretty hard and you’re breathing funny. Do you have a fever?” The farm pony had to collect herself. This was getting out of hoof pretty quickly. With a foreleg waving away the concerns, Applejack spoke, chuckling nervously, “Ah’m sorry, I’m just a little tired. Ah’ve got… Uh. Cramps. Ya know. Time of the month.” “O-oh!” Lyra flushed red, “sorry, I didn’t mean to pry… But, you do know the sign says the price for a bag of five apples is two bits, right?” “It does?” Applejack craned her head forward to peer at the sign to discover that Lyra was indeed correct. “Ah horseapples, Ah forgot to change tha’… Sorry, Lyra, the price is actually three bits for five apples. I jus' forgot to change it. Ya’ll know Ah’m not trying to swindle ya, right? Ya know what? We’ll call it two since Ah’ve caused ya some trouble.” Lyra shook her head, placing the originally asked amount down onto the counter instead, smiling warmly at the other mare. “No, no, here’s the three bits. I didn’t mean to complain or make a fuss. It’s just the sign says differently. Maybe you are just having one of those days… You normally warn us days in advance if the price is going to change, so it kind of took me by surprise, that's all.” Ah need to focus and stop thinkin’ about less than decent things in public. Ah probably look like a right idiot. “Applejack?” Maybe Ah jus’ scrap the whole schemin’ an’ jus’ go on up an’ say it. Tell her how Ah feel, an’ be honest with myself and be done with it all, go an’ get rejected an’ destroy mah friendship with her forever. “I’m going to… Take my apples… If that’s okay?” “Huh?” Applejack blinked to the bag apples that were now enveloped in the aura of Lyra’s magic, levitating up into the air to float besides the mare, “Oh! Sure. Thank ya’ll kindly for bein’ so understandin’. Ah’ll go and correct th’ sign right now so this mistake doesn’ happen again. Thank ya’ll for pointin’ it out, Lyra. Ya’ll really saved me from more embarrassment.” “Any time. You take care, and I hope you feel better soon,” Lyra gave Applejack one last look of concern, turned, and simply trotted away in the direction of Bonbon’s sweet shop. Applejack waved after the departing lyrist, forcing a smile as she did so. “Thank ya kindly!” Then, once the mare was safely out of ear shot, the farm pony sighed aloud in frustration and dropped her head down hard onto the stall’s countertop, planting her blush ridden face onto the surface with a loud thud, her body sagging under the weight of the burning desire pulsing in her chest. Ah just lied. Ah’m so ashamed. “... This isn’t me at all. If Ah go over there now Ah don’ what Ah’d do…” Applejack groaned, feeling her prized Stetson slip from off of her golden locks and lay onto the stall next to her as she shook her head from side to side, muttering to herself, “Ah’ve lusted for mares before and Ah’ve always fought the temptation for the good of the family but… she jus’ drives me crazy! Nothin’ ever interferes with mah duties at the farm but she jus somehow’ waltzes on into mah brain and into my heart whenever she wants an’ does it so effortlessly at that.” “Hey, Applejack, are you okay? I heard you were feeling a bit under the weather.” Applejack froze and started to squirm internally at the sound of an angelic, well-spoken voice she did not need to hear right now. Her heart leapt up into her throat and caused anxiety to churn about in the pit of her stomach as she bolted her head up from the table and gawked at Twilight Sparkle, who stood before her stall with an expression of worry etched upon her features. Oh, BUCK! Did she hear what Ah jus’ said?! “I ran into Lyra and she told me you were not feeling too good,” Twilight stepped around the stall, approaching Applejack’s side, “and you were muttering to yourself just now, and to be honest, she was right. You’re sweating really hard and breathing really strangely. Maybe we should take you to Nurse Redheart for a quick check just to be safe?” Oh thank Celestia… She didn’ hear. Twilight raised a hoof, and placed it upon Applejack’s shoulder in a comforting manner, “Come on, I’m sure the stall can look after itself for a little while.” “N-n-no, it is okay Twi’, I jus’… Ya know. Time of the month.” That excuse again? Can’t Ah think of somethin’ else better than that?! “Oh… I see,” Twilight flushed red, glancing away, “I didn’t know. Lyra didn’t tell me about that. But I know what you mean, though. I can get pretty cranky and feverish too during...” Twilight chuckled nervously, “ahem, those times.” Ah so wanna curl up in a ball under a rock somewhere righ’ ‘bout now… “Maybe we can go grab a bite to eat? My treat. That might help settle you down.” Ah think it’s gonna do the opposite. “And I’m pretty sure you’ve been working all day as it is, so that’s probably not helping matters either; besides, I’m pretty free up on time right now and I’d love to chat about things that do not pertain to royal affairs.” Twilight offered a wide, beaming smile, which only served to stir a similar expression across Applejack’s lips. Is she askin’ me out on a date?! Calm down! Calm down… It’s jus’ for a chat. There’s no hidden meanin’ behind it or anythin’. Right? Applejack nodded, and glanced about herself in a casual manner, trying her best to calm herself by exhaling slow and steady breaths, “Yeah, why not? Ah’m feelin’ a bit peckish and Ah could use a sit down for a few.” “Excellent! Where would you like to go?” Wait. This is it! This is the perfect opportunity! It took every ounce of willpower to prevent the farm pony from jumping up and down in excitement. For the solution to the problem to which had plagued her for the entirety of the day had just trotted on over and calmly plopped itself in front of her to take advantage of. She would be a fool to not act on this opportunity, and so, with a muster of courage, she nodded towards Twilight. “Ah don’ mind. S’long as it has good grub an’ a place for me to park my flank. Lead the way, Twi’.” This is it. Ah can do it. Ah will tell her what Ah feel cause if Ah don’… Ah’m gonna go crazy. > But I Messed Up > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- “So what do you think, Applejack?” Twilight asked as her attention drew from the topic at hoof to her untouched meal that sat before her, gazing at in in a way as if the solution to her dilemma would present itself there. Mostly about you... Applejack broke free from her continued inner monologue for the billionth time that day, which was fast becoming a graveyard of dead schemes to attain Twilight’s affection, ranging from the direct, to the obscure, to the downright crazy. Askin’ for Discord’s help… Ah’m definitely goin’ looney if Ah think for a second Ah could trust that no good prankster to help me. Clearing her throat with a cough and recollecting herself, Applejack poked at a cherry tomato that was lost within the sea of salad leaves and sticks of celery that was to be her light lunch, “M’sorry Twi’… Ah was thinkin’… Well, Ah honestly think we should—wait, what were we talkin’ ‘bout again?” “About the gift for Fluttershy…” Twilight frowned towards her friend, “have you not been listening to a word I’ve been saying, Applejack? I’ve been talking at you for at least half an hour now,” she gave Applejack a suspicious look, “Lyra was right. You are acting really strange, even if you are on your—ahem, period.” “Ah jus…” Applejack paused for a moment, her bright apple green eyes avoiding the inquisitive gaze of her friend, as she once again formulated yet another lie, “Ah jus’ have a lot on mah mind righ’ now, Sugar. Work at th’ orchard is jus’ increasing every season, and we’re gonna be plannin’ on extending th’ orchard a couple more acres… Lost some sleep over it tryin’ to figure out th’ logistics of it all, but nothin’ bad. Maybe that’s why ya’ll think Ah’m acting so oddly… Lack of sleep can do that to some ponies.” “Applejack, I know exactly what you mean, but you need to understand we have been through this before,” Twilight leant forward and casually reached out with her hooves to cup Applejack’s hoof, ceasing its pestering pokes upon that innocent cherry tomato. Twilight hardly registered the fact Applejack tensed up the moment contact was made. “You know you don’t have to do this all alone, Applejack. We would be glad to lend a helping hoof if you are struggling at the farm; and if the real problem here is the logistical side of things with the expansion, then why don’t you let me worry about that?” Twilight offered a light squeeze to the hoof, her warm smile only deepening in its sincerity with each passing second, “you know I’m great when it comes to scheduling events right down to the finest detail. I’ll even do all the paperwork for you.” Twi’... Ya’ll holding my hoof in yours right now isn’t a good idea. Ah might end up kissin’ you... Heck, Ah’m just ‘bout ready to launch myself over that table there and make love to you in this here restaurant! With a wavering sigh, Applejack managed a smile to mirror Twilight’s own, “Sure, why not? Ah suppose Ah was trying to take on too much again. Thanks, Twi, ya’ll the best friend this stubborn mare could ever ask for.” “Good, now, we can discuss the details later on, but for now why don’t we relax and eat, okay? I think my hay fries are getting cold and I am starving!” Hoisting a clump of hay fries towards her mouth with the use of her magic, Twilight then proceeded to quite inelegantly stuff her face with fries to the point that her cheeks bulged to an absurd and almost comedic proportion. And yet; much to Applejack’s surprise, despite her mouth being completely full of the scrumptious hay fires, Twilight attempted to speak. “Yoo weally nee’ t’trammshf fweally goor! Wan’shum, Ahffelshak?” And failed at it spectacularly. But f’some reason, Ah find it kinda cute… In a… Strange kinda way… Wow, Ah’m totally in love with her, huh? Applejack simply stared at Twilight’s ravenous gorging in complete and utter silence for a few moments, completely forgetting about her own plate of food as she contemplated just how cute Twilight was when she ate, even if it resembled a predator tearing into its prey mercilessly. With a glance about the small fast food restaurant, Applejack bit at her lower lip nervously, blushing heavily out of embarrassment for Twilight more than herself, as she realized they were not exactly alone. Some of the customers that were seated about the establishment trying to eat their own meals exchanged confused glances at the scene, unsure on how to take the nigh on barbaric table manners coming from a princess of Equestria, while a few other ponies openly gawked at the display as if witnessing the most shocking and horrific of scenes in Equestrian history to date. A mother; Applejack had noticed on the other side of the restaurant, went as far as even shielding her foal’s innocent gaze by lifting her hooves up to block out such a travesty against good manners… And Applejack could had sworn she heard the mother whispering to her foal not to look, while trying to explain why a princess would eat so- “Applejack?” Twilight inquired before following her friend’s gaze, having long swallowed her large mouthful of fries. Quickly however, Twilight gasped and blushed redder than the very hide from Big Macintosh’s back. Ah… Ah guess she’s cute when she blushes as well... “I-I’m sorry everypony! I was just—uh—really, really hungry,” Twilight laughed nervously, lifting her hooves defensively as she spoke, “it won’t happen again…” Still laughing, Twilight looked back from the other customers as they calmly returned to their meal, her face transforming into a deep rooted embarrassment as she shifted awkwardly in her seat, her gaze firmly affixed onto her half eaten meal. She’s embarrassed. Ah better say somethin’ to— “I probably looked like such a slob just then…” Twilight moved to hide her face into her hooves, “I hope no pony from the press is following me today. If they took a photo of that… The last thing I need is me stuffing my face like some uneducated, ill-mannered mare slapped all over the national tabloids… What kind of a princess does that?” Applejack smiled, shaking her head with a light giggle as it bubbled in her throat merrily, “Don’ ya’ll sweat it, Sugarcube, Ah don’ think any pony in their righ’ mind would want’t tarnish ya’ll good name with a silly photo. You have saved Equestria countless times, an’ ya’ll attractive to boot even if ya were just stuffing yaself like an Apple eating a buffet of turnovers at an Apple family reunion.” Twilight breathed a sigh, dropping her hooves down so she could look up at Applejack with a renewing smile at the sight of her friends merriment of the situation, blushing only slightly at the compliment to her appearance. “Th… Thank you, Applejack, that was very sweet of you.” Sweet of me? What did Ah say to get that kind of a— Wait. Ah jus’ called her attractive. This my chance; Ah have to tell her how Ah feel righ’ now! If Ah can go an easily pass off a truth like that then surely Ah can say what Ah need to say! Applejack’s cheeks went beet red, as Twilight continued on, “You are probably right, Applejack. Maybe I’m just being paranoid again,” the mare chuckled, “I do have an overactive imagination at times.” “Ya don’t say?” Applejack looked at Twilight incredulously, raising an eyebrow, before breaking out into a smile, “well, ya’ll are the thinkin’ type of pony Twi’, so there’s no wonder you have an overactive imagination. You intelligent types are all always thinkin’ beyond what common ponies like Ah do.” “Applejack! Don’t say that about yourself. You are a very intelligent pony even if you do not want to believe it; not only that, you are also very strong, dependable, and probably the most honest pony I know.” Applejack’s heart jolted in her chest at the score of compliments. Suddenly feeling rather self conscious all of a sudden, Applejack found herself smiling rather shyly at Twilight, a hoof rising up to adjust her Stetson so she could hide behind the brim, “Thank ya kindly, Twi’. But… To be honest, Ah…” This is it, AJ. Ya’ll can do it. “Applejack?” “Wh-what Ah mean to say is Ah… T-that is to say Ah…” Twilight got up from her seat and trotted around the table, mirroring the same gesture she offered when she met Applejack acting strangely at the stall. She simply placed a hoof on Applejack’s shoulder, concern once again expressed in her voice and displayed upon her face. Ah… Ah’m so scared… Ah’ve never been this scared in my entire life. Why? Am Ah afraid to loose her, tha’ much? Wha’ if she doesn’ return my feelings? No. What if she doesn’t even like other mares. “I knew something was wrong. Look,” Twilight took on a rather authortive tone, and gently shook Applejack to try and get her attention; or at the very least, stop her from hiding beneath the rim of that hat, “I think you need to tell me what it is that is making be like this. It can’t just be the work. Is it that bad that you cannot even tell one of your best friends? I promise, Applejack, no matter what it is, I will be there to help you…” “Ah don’t… Ah don’t think Ah can tell ya… Ever.” Please, Twi’, Ah can’t! Ah can’t do it! Ah’m such a coward! Ah can’t risk this friendship over mah lusts for her! She’s too important to me to lose over somethin’ like that! Ah’d never forgive myself! Applejack clenched her eyes shut as she felt the Steton being lifted from the top of her head, “Wait. D-don’t—” “Applejack… You can tell me anything,” came Twilight’s soothing voice, “If you’re this upset about it, it must be something serious. Come on, let’s go take a walk somewhere so we can talk about it. You will feel a lot better afterwards, I promise.” Applejack felt her head be pulled into a tight embrace, and that, was to be the last brick to fall in her crumbling defenses. “Ah’m in lo—” Twilight pulled back from the embrace, and drew her own teary eyed gaze down upon Applejack’s face that was scrunched up into a shape of despair as she once again stopped herself from spilling the beans. As if the farm pony was experiencing a physical sort of pain whenever she tried to speak about the issue, whereas Twilight herself was also finding a similar sensation in her own heart, as she watched the most stalwart and noble of her close circle of friends break down into tears right in the middle of a public place. “Whatever it is, you don’t have to tell me. Not here in front of every pony. Come on, let’s go. You can tell me all about it while we go, and we will get through this togeth—” AH LOVE YOU, TWILIGHT SPARKLE! “—Mmph?!” At the feeling of passionately hot plush lips against her own, Twilight froze up like a statue, her entire body rigid at the sudden assault her friend sprang upon her. Wide, amethyst eyes, filled with confusion, quietly observed Applejack’s face against her own as the innocent lingering kiss lasted a full minute. What have Ah done? The kiss broke. “Ah… Ah love… Mares…” Applejack whispered numbly, tears streaking down her cheeks as she turned and bolted out of the restaurant, leaving a stunned Twilight Sparkle exactly where she was frozen to, ignoring the once again stunned and gawking faces of the other customers on the way out. What am Ah doing? Ah’ve ruined everything. All for a stupid kiss. All Ah had to do was say Ah loved her! Not kiss her! Ah’m stupid! Ah’ve just taken advantage of my best friend! What kind of pony am Ah? “Ah’m never gonna show my face outside of Sweet Apples Acres agai—whoanellylookout!” During her blind dash to escape what she had done, Applejack had barreled into an innocent mare in her path. Both ponies went flailing to the ground, and most fortunately for Applejack, landed upon her unfortunate victim. “Gah! Get off me!” Bonbon snapped, as she writhed below Applejack’s much sturdier frame, “what’s the big rush anyway?” Applejack quickly got off of the mare, and helped her to her feet, “Ah’m s-sorry Bon, Ah jus’—” “Applejack!” Came a distant, and very familiar voice. “Ah need to hide somewhere! Please, Ah’m beggin’ ya Bonbon,” she stared pleadingly into the mare’s eyes, who only saddened at the tear stained, desperate face of the farm pony. “Wow, what happened to make you cry, Applejack?” Bonbon blinked. “Jus’ hide me! Please!” “Well… Sure, but from wha—” “Applejack!” The owner of the voice was getting closer, and it caused Bonbon to glance in the general direction where she could see one Twilight Sparkle searching the marketplace frantically. Applejack drooped her body and head low, as if trying to use the marketplace crowd as a means of hiding her, “Bonbon jus’ don’ ask and jus’ hide me. Ah’ll explain everythin’ to ya jus’ for the love of Celestia, please, hide me!” Bonbon nodded, although she sighed, somewhat slightly frustrated she was steamrolled over by the bigger earth pony, “Fine, fine… Follow me,” Bonbon turned and moved through the crowd with a very shaken Applejack in tow. “Where ya’ll takin’ me?” Applejack kept her head low, her eyes gazing worriedly off in the direction she knew Twilight was searching for her. “The shop. We’ll go into the back, so that way, even if Twilight does come into the shop, she won’t be able to find you.” Applejack nodded somberly and closed her eyes, uttering not a word as both she and Bonbon disappeared into the sea of ponies, departing for the confectionery haven that was Bonbon’s Sweet Shop. > Can I Fix It? > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- The other half of the cottage that was Bon Bon’s sweet shop was a quaint residential area for the live-in owner and her freeloading partner, Lyra. While the rest of the cottage was perhaps a picturesque scene of the perfect household of cleanliness, the downstairs kitchen adjacent to the shop floor separated from prying eyes by a single door on the other hand was perhaps anything but that. Pots and pans filled the sink ceiling high, while icing sugar, flour and granulated sugar practically covered the floor in a fine dusting that best belonged on top of a cake, while the wooden work surfaces fared little better in its condition where empty eggshells were piled mountain high in discarded mixing bowls, with the odd used utensil such a whisk or a spatula randomly placed here or there just to add to the chaos with further disorder. Bon Bon ran a tight ship when it came to the rest of the house; but here, in her domain? The gloves were off – or rather the cooking gloves were on, where no amount of mess would ever bother her otherwise clean state of mind. A single stain; an item out of place item or even the tiniest crumb beyond the kitchen walls within her cottage or even on the shop floor on the other hand, threw the sweet shop maker into a fit of what Lyra could only describe as ‘cleaning-rage,’ to which the unicorn found immensely cute and thus an easy target for her near constant teasing. Thus, this chaotic scenery was to be the witness of three mares seated about the central kitchen table, with Lyra and Bon Bon occupying one side in close proximity to the other, while Applejack nursed a hot mug of mulled hard cider between her hooves. Escaping the marketplace had gone rather well and without a hitch in the plan. Once they had arrived at the shop, Bon Bon had closed up for the afternoon despite Applejack’s protests and reassurances that she would be quite happy to sneak out the back. However, after four mugs of mulled cider between the three mares, the late afternoon had already started to shine its dying sun through the kitchen window, throwing the trio in an orange glow that only served to sparkle off the constant stream of silent tears that ran down Applejack’s cheeks, as she recounted the happenings of the day to her saviors. The two mares listened intently, showing neither sign of disgust or shock at the events as they were recounted from the farm pony. They both seemed sympathetic to her cause; especially Bon Bon, who almost welled up as Applejack poured her heart out and confessed her love for Twilight Sparkle and then further explained the subsequent potential ruination of her love ever being reciprocated, due to Applejack’s rather uncharacteristic and brash actions at the restaurant. As the story came to its closure, Applejack fell silent and simply drained away the entirety of her mug’s contents, her sparkling emerald eyes focused on the bottom of the empty mug as if she could find the solution to her problems there. Ah’m startin’ t’ feel a bit tipsy… best not drink anymore. Bon Bon, noticing the awkward silence at the drop of a hat, quickly moved from her seat and approached Applejack’s side, placing hoof out to rest against her shoulder in an attempt to comfort her, offering the farm pony her most soothing and motherly of tones. “Oh, Applejack… I know it may seem pretty bad right now, but… it’s hard coming out, you know? You should had talked to someone sooner rather than just bottling it all up like that. It was bound to come out at an inopportune moment… unfortunately… it happened to come out at the wrong place and at the wrong time, that’s all. These things happen.” Aye, these things do happen… but why did it have’t go an’ happen to me? “I’ll say!” Lyra leant forward on her stool, the unicorn’s opinion caused Bon Bon to wince; as if dreading the rest of her partner’s words. “You practically smooched one of the Princesses of Equestria in public! That’s pretty bold, Applejack! Hell, imagine all of the faces of those people at the restaurant when you—” Ah wasn’ lookin’ at them… Ah was lookin’ at Twi’s face… Ah’m almost certain Twi’ seemed shocked an’ all but… she didn’ seem… angry? Ah’m not sure. It was all one mighty blurr. “Lyra…” Bon Bon warned. “—planted a wet sloppy one on her! That must had took some serious balls you know! Didn’t think take you for the ‘take what you want’ type.” Th’ kiss… was wonderful… Ah know if Ah could go back Ah would change what Ah did… but, righ’ now, ah’m kinda happy it happened, even if Ah won’t get th’ chance again. “Lyra,” Bon Bon spoke much firmer this time, as if scolding a child for some childish transgression. “I mean, wow, Applejack! You really do aim big! A Princess? Twilight Sparkle no less? You two are both the least likeliest of pairing I ever could have possibly imagine; and trust me, I’ve imagined quite a f—” “LYRA! Can you stop speaking for a second and look?” Bon Bon snapped as her eyes glared daggers at her partner while she indicated a hoof to Applejack, who only seemed to shrink back into herself at the memory of the kiss renewing its guilt ridden hold upon her, Applejack’s bottom lip trembling as she teetered on the edge of another breakdown. We… we are, aren’t we? We are an unlikely pairing... How could Ah measure up t’some strappin’ Princely stallion who could whisk her away from me with handsome charms an’ such? It’s as simple as apple pie… Ah just can’t measure up to that... all Ah got is a farm an'... love? Lyra shifted uncomfortably on her seat, realizing she had ran her mouth off without thinking. “Ah… Sorry sweetie… sorry, Applejack. I… look, what I meant to say was…” She paused, then blinked, “what did she taste like?” Kinda like Parma Violets, actually… kinda nice. Kinda flowery. “Lyra! That is highly inappropriate given the situation!” “Whaaaat?” Lyra lifted up her hooves either side of her in a shrug, “I was just wondering! You taste like cherry liqueur and chocolate so I was just curious!” Bon Bon sighed out in frustration as a blush formulated on her cheeks, moving from Applejack’s side to approach her partner and mercilessly strike her upside the head with a hoof. "I swear... some times I wonder about you, Lyra." Lyra winced and flailed her hooves up to rub at the spot where she was struck, “H-hey! That really hurt you know…” “For the love of—be mindful of other people’s feelings, Lyra. She just went through a terrible ordeal; not only that, she went to confess to the mare she has loved since she first laid eyes on her and yet instead of saying she loved her specifically, she blurted out she loved mares!” “You have to admit, it is kind of funny…” Lyra offered with a nervous smile. “Well I can completely sympathise with her on this one because I have been in a similar situation in the past, haven't I, Lyra?” “I have no idea what you are talking about.” Lyra huffed. Bon Bon sighed, “Don’t you see what a terrible spot this puts Applejack in?” The long drawn out silence only served to make Bon Bon increase the ferocity of her glare, but Lyra made a point to think over the question for far too long than what was required until she finally replied with a shake of her head. “Nope, not really.” A hoof quickly went up to Bon Bon’s face. “Why in Equestria did I fall in love with you again?” Lyra grinned mischievously, “Well, I thought that was pretty obvious by how you—MMPH?!” Covering Lyra’s mouth just in time with two of her hooves, Bon Bon laughed nervously and glanced back to Applejack, who still seemed more interested in her empty mug than the conversation going on before her. Ah wish Ah was like Lyra… or even Bon Bon… they look so happy together. Ah wish Ah could have th’ same for Twi and me… But Ah’ve ruined it... “I swear, Lyra, sometimes I wonder why I put up with you. Can you please get your head out of the gutter for just one minute? We have a serious situation here and we need to take it as seriously as possible for Applejack’s sake.” Applejack broke out of her revere and offered both mares a smile. “Ah’m okay, sugarcubes, it’s… Ah suppose ya guys bein’ here an’ listenin’ to mah story has sorta helped me calm down some. Ya’ll both really too kind for lettin’ me hide here. Ah probably look like a righ’ fool to you two.” Returning to her seat and allowing Lyra to breathe once again by removing her hooves, Bon Bon smiled warmly to the mare seated across the table and simply shook her head. “I can’t say I am surprised that you like other mares… I have never seen you with a stallion before.” “Jus’ never been interested in them,” Applejack shrugged, “because Ah...” Lyra leaned forward, taking a deep breath as she placed upon her ‘serious face,’ a hoof reaching out to rest on top of her marefriend’s own, “because you love Twilight Sparkle?” Applejack simply nodded. “I hate to this say this… Lyra is…” Bon Bon side glanced the unicorn besides her, who spotted the silent threat to utter a single word laden in her Sweetie’s eyes, “sort of right in a crude and tactless way. There is no denying you really did fall in love with a most difficult mare.” “I’ll say,” Lyra chimed in, waving away the glare she got from Bon Bon as she simply continued, “hear me out, Bonnie-this is what I think. I’m almost one hundred and fifty percent sure that right now Twilight Sparkle is looking for you on the basis that you confessed your sexuality and not the fact you love her.” Bon Bon blinked, somewhat stunned at the level headed observation from her partner. “Even if you did play hockey with her tonsils.” Bon Bon’s face instantly crashed into the table with a whine, causing the furniture to tremble violently until the impact. Lyra continued, “Did she seem angry when she was chasing after you?” Applejack shook her head. Ah don’ think she sounded angry… In fact, why didn’ she jus’ break the kiss when Ah did it? “Then I fail to see why you are upset in shoving your tongue down the throat of the mare you love. Kudos to you!” Bon Bon almost wept into the table, exasperated beyond belief. “Lyraaaaaaaa! For the love of—” “What?! So what if Applejack went a bit cuckoo back there and ended up kissing the mare she loves without confessing? At least Twilight didn’t outright reject her! The kiss must had lasted long enough for Twilight to realize what was happening, right? So surely she must had been curious, right?” She’s… she’s right… How long did it last? Thirty seconds? A minute? Ah can’t quite remember! It happened all so fast! Applejack’s face had become a perpetual shade of red at this point as she entertained the concept that Twilight may not had disliked the kiss after all. Of course she would not know for sure without asking the mare herself, but it did indeed calm Applejack’s anxiety attack. Smiling to Lyra, Applejack placed the empty mug down and nodded, “Ya’ll right sugar, Ah suppose Ah panicked and left without knowin’ for sure what Twi’ was thinkin’ when Ah did it… maybe Ah could had salvaged the situation if Ah had stayed.” Applejack had to admit, but she admired Lyra to some degree. The mare called out things as they were; blunt and to the point with (mostly) sensible observations. It was a level of honesty Applejack could understand and respect. Bon Bon at this point was perplexed as to how Lyra got through to Applejack, but, she easily embraced the idea as she was quite used to Lyra pulling off feats of miracles in regards to situations like these with her unique way of speaking. Maybe that was why she fell in love with the mare. Gathering her bearings, Applejack regarded the two with a pointed stare, her words heavily doused with uncertainty. “Do ya’ll think Ah have a chance with her?” Both mares glanced to the other before regarding Applejack and it was Bon Bon who spoke first. “Listen hun, maybe you shouldn't look at it quite like that.” Lyra chimed in, hoofbumping the air above her head. “Exactly! Think more positively! Maybe the question you should be asking is if she has a chance with you?” By the time Lyra, Bon Bon and Applejack ended their heart to hearts, it was almost midnight. Applejack excused herself and apologized for her intrusion naturally, practically begging the pair to allow her to make it up to them in some shape or another that naturally Lyra had decided to offer some lewd suggestions that was swiftly shot down; and subsequently struck out of Lyra’s head by a thrashing hoof from Bon Bon. The silent walk back to Sweet Apple Acres was perhaps the longest and loneliest in her entire life; never once had Applejack felt afraid to walk alone at night, but right now? Alone with her thoughts that mulled over Lyra and Bon Bon’s advice, Applejack felt her disastrous day could only be complete if Twilight Sparkle would catch her here and now in her undecided state of being. As these thoughts processed, she neglected to take in her surroundings; her body shifting into autopilot as she accessed the grounds of Sweet Apple Acres and trotted right on over to her house. Fortunately, every light in the Apple household was cut, except for… Breaking out of her daze Applejack slowed to a stop as she glared up suspiciously to the dim light spilling out from her bedroom window. “What in tarnation? Who’s gone and trespassed into my room?” Frowning, she made her way into the house, creeping through the household until she came to the foot of the stairs where she paused and stared up into what she would expect to be the encroaching darkness of the night. Instead, the first door on the left on the landing at the top of the stairs; her bedroom, was slightly ajar and spilling candle light into the hallway. With an expression of sheer determination Applejack stealthily strode up the stairs, making a point to skip a step or two she knew would alert the entire Apple household of her late arrival, stinking like hard cider. Being caught now probably attain her a lecture from Granny Smith in the morning. Which almost always followed a brief-though not so brief-history lesson of a point in Granny Smith’s life. By the time Applejack came to the doorway, she took a deep breath and strode on in. Sat upon her bed was her younger sister, Applebloom, looking simply baffled at the small book-shaped item she had pinned under her hooves upon the bed. Stunned by the sudden appearance of a rather irritated looking Applejack, Applebloom parted her mouth to speak, yet instead, nothing came out save for an alarmed squeak. “What in tarnation are ya’ll doin’ in my room at here this hour, Applebloom?” Applejack trotted forward, her eyes giving her younger sister a very stern stare that quickly melted into a panic as she realized what it was Applebloom was reading. “What do ya’ll think ya doin’ readin’ my diary?” Applejack narrowed her eyes, which caused the younger Apple to shrink back on the bed. “Ah’m… ah’m sorry, sis…” “No ifs. No buts. An no excuses, youngin’. We shall speak of this in th’ mornin’. Now. Gittup, an’ mozy on to bed.” “But… Applejack I—” Applejack almost stomped a hoof down. Fortunately, she caught herself before she could alert Big Mac who slept next door to the situation. “What did Ah jus’ say, Applebloom? To bed with ya.” “B-but sis… whaddya mean ya like mares? An’ why do ya wanna kiss Twilight Sparkle? Isn't tha' what special someponies are supposed to do?” > Please Don't Leave Me > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- The Apple family, steeped in tradition, would start each day almost exactly the same. Despite all these years of repetition in regards to breakfast that was made by Granny Smith, Applejack would normally feel comfortable and happy to be around her family as they ate mountains of pancakes smothered in maple syrup, drank pitchers of fresh apple juice and merrily discussed the days chores and its allocation to what member. On this particular morning on the other hoof she certainly did not feel this way, considering the events of the past twenty four hours still weighing heavily upon her conscious, thus firmly affixing her attention upon the stack of untouched pancakes that was growing colder by the minute. Ah’m gonna go to the library and Ah’m gonna say what it is Ah meant. Then Ah can get kindly rejected and then everythin’ will be back to normal. Applejack barely registered the eerily quiet atmosphere surrounding the kitchen table or the quizzical glances of Big Macintosh and Granny Smith. Even Applebloom was being unusually quiet; especially considering when under normal circumstances, Applebloom would had been running off her mouth on potential ideas in her never ending quest to achieve cutie mark, asking the rest of the family for their own ideas to help her. Lifting her eyes up from her pancakes, Applejack noted Applebloom staring forlornly at her pancakes, almost mirroring Applejack’s own dejected posture. “Ya’ll alrigh’ younin’?” Granny Smith inquired towards Applebloom as she ate a chunk of pancake, catching the attention of Big Macintosh as he poured his family each a glass of apple juice. “Nothing,” muttered the stroppy filly, lifting a hoof up to poke her pancakes and push it away from her. But Applejack knew the truth behind her sister’s demeanor. After all, she in not so many words ‘nicely’ threaten her younger sibling and told her she would essentially buck her right across Sweet Apple Acres if she ever uttered a single word written from her diary to a anypony. Applejack even went as far as forcing Applebloom to Pinkie Promise, twice, just to be on the safe side, for as we all know, no one ever breaks a Pinkie Promise. Especially twice. Ah didn’ mean to take it out on her but, dang nabit! She was readin’ my journal! She had no right to be in my room and Ah certinaly don’ need to feel guilty for reprimanding her. Granny Smith lightly tapped a hoof on the table. “Poppycock! Ah kn-know tha’ look an’ it d-don’t mean you’re fine.” “Ayep,” nodded Big Macintosh as he settled back to his place at the table, chomping on down on some pancake. “Ah’m fine, Granny, Ah promise. Ah’m just not tha’ hungry today, that’s all.” But what Ah said… Ah had no right to treat her the way Ah did… ...she looks so sad. What have Ah done? Why am Ah just screwin’ everything up lately? Guilty from the fiasco with Twilight, now mixed with a heavy guilt that she had wounded the feelings of her younger sister, Applejack sighed and leant forward a touch across the table to place a hoof atop Applebloom’s head. “Ah’m sorry everypony. It’s my fault. Ah caught her in my room when Ah came home last night and Ah overreacted. Ah might had said something pretty hurtful things. Ah’m so sorry Applebloom, but Ah was having a right ol’ terrible day an’ I took it out on you.” Ah’m a horrible sister. No. A horrible pony. The eldest of the Apple Family blinked between the two. “Ya’ll two be arugin’ over s-something silly again? Now ya’ll two girls m-make up. No point dwellin’ over silly siblin’ argu-uh-ahm-arguments.” Ah think Ah know how to win her over. Applebloom, Ah mean… Ah can’t even begin to imagine how in Equestria Ah’m gonna win Twi’ over. Pigs will sooner fly an’ Discord will stop being a pain in our flank by that time. Applejack smiled softly towards her younger sibling. “Can ya’ll find it in your heart to forgive your big sis’? Ah really Ah’m so very sorry, “Applejack stood up and made her way around the table to stand next to her sister, “how about we go on over to Sugarcube Corner an’ get those sweets ya’ll be eyein’ up all week? Would you like that?” As Applebloom hazarded a glance up, Applejack noted her sister found no solace in her words. The young filly simply got up from the table, excused herself with a mumble and simply walked out of the kitchen with her head hung low, leaving the rest of the Apple Family in an awkward state of silence that beheld two sets of eyes upon the eldest sister. Applejack returned Granny’s and Mac’s stern glare with a sigh. “... Ah’m gonna go talk to her. M’sorry Granny for ruining breakfast, but it was very delicious. Excuse me.” Even if I didn’ get to eat a bite of it… sorry, Granny. Eesh, Ah can almost feel their eyes burrowin’ into the back of my head. Applejack left the kitchen in hot pursuit of her sister, choosing not to look back at the two ponies she could only surmise were quite perplexed at the situation. Upon entering the hallway Applejack craned her head up towards the thuds coming from the stairs as Applebloom trudged her way up them, quite evidently sulking. “Applebloom! Please, Ah’m sorry for shoutin’ at ya like tha—” A knock on the front door of the Apple Family household gave Applejack pause, blinking her emerald eyes upon the portal for a moment before looking back to the still retreating Applebloom that had made it to the upstairs landing. “We’ll talk later okay, sis’?” With no reply to her heartfelt promise, Applejack sighed. When a second series of knocks came, Granny Smith called from the kitchen over a crescendo of plates and cutlery being washed up and stored away. “Applejack, can ye answer that door? It might be ye—um, oh, tha’ Filthy Rich fellow fer another batch of our Zap Apple pies!” Great… back to work Ah go… no rest for the wicked an’ all that. Sighing yet again, though this time in frustration at the mere concept of having to speak with a stallion she barely could tolerate; considering he was the father to that spoiled brat Diamond Tiara. Applejack knew all too well that little filly was the biggest bully in Applebloom’s school, so naturally, Applejack blamed Filthy for his excessive need to spoil his little ‘princess’ and turn her into such a creature. Placing on her business winning smile and adjusting her stetson, Applejack approached the front door nearby and opened it. “Howdy, how can I help—” Applejack gawked at the mare standing in the doorway or more notably how she was smothered from head to hoof in mud, “—you… Trixie?” What in Tartarus does she want? “Ahem.” Trixie lifted her muzzle up, displaying annoyance at the lack of her great and powerful title, though she seemed rather subdued in her attempt to correct the mistake. “Hello again Applesack—” Applejack almost growled. “Applejack,” she corrected with a glare, “an’ what do you want, Trixie? Twi might have forgiven ya for what you almost did to Ponyville, but Ah sure as hay have not.” Applejack further noted the lack of the show mare’s own signature hat and the disarrayed state of her prized cloak torn to shreds. She lifted a brow, though merely said nothing in regards to it. Trixie cleared her throat. “I do apologize for parting on bad terms, Applejack, but… Trixie has come to ask if you have seen a yellow mare flying over your orchard this morning from the direction of Ponyville?” “Excuse me?” Applejack tilted her head. Trixie frowned. “Orange mane? Pretty quick?” Why do Ah know that description? Isn’t that somepony in th’ Wonderbolts Rainbow Dash goes on about? “Ah don’ think so,” Applejack eyed Trixie suspiciously, “why?” Trixie’s reaction caused Applejack to actually care and further question the mare, as she became rather bashful and somewhat skittish. Is Trixie blushing? “Trixie is merely… um… looking for this mare to—uh—yes! To return her the ten bits she borrowed from me a week ago when she attended one of my great and simply fantastic displays at Canterlot!” Applejack’s expression faltered. “Ya’ll do realize that made no sense, righ’? An Ah can also kinda tell you’re lying to me.” After a pause, Trixie replied indignantly, stammering slightly over her words. “Y-yes it did make sense! And no I am not lying! Do not attempt to insinuate the Great and Powerful—” “Alright, Trixie, Ah don’ know what kinda trick you’re trying to pull here, but Ah sure as hay ain’t gettin’ involved nor am Ah in the mood. Ya’ll have a good day now, you hear? And get off my family’s property while you’re at it.” Attempting to close the door, Applejack’s attempt was seized by a hoof jammed in the crack, followed by Trixie’s head squeezing through it to semi-intrude into her home. “Wait! Please! Trixie is not trying to trick anypony this time! Trixie swears her life on it! I… I just need to find her!” Applejack gawked at Trixie’s tenacity, and, of course, the rather desperate expression she displayed. It rendered her somewhat speechless, though one question did come to mind. “Okay, why, exactly?” “I...” Trixie swallowed hard. “That is to say, Trixie…” Applejack could almost smell the truth coming out of the mare; it was teetering upon the tip of her tongue and just when Applejack thought she would finally hear the truth… “Needs to get her autograph?” Trixie reasoned with a nervous smile. Mercilessly, Applejack placed a hoof onto Trixie’s muzzle, pushing the mare beyond the crack in the door and slammed it shut once she was safely out of the way. “Th’ nerve of that mare!” Applejack cried in exasperation, “Lyin’ straight to my face not once, but twice!” It’s not like ya’ll recent track record trumps that, AJ… “Who was it?” Shouted Granny from the kitchen. “Jus’ a vagrant trying to sell us stuff.” Applejack replied with a raised voice. “Ehhhh? Speak up! Ah can barely hear ye!” Applejack placed a hoof upon her face. “It was nothing, Granny!” She shouted louder this time. “Oooooooooooh! Okay!” Applejack turned from the door towards the stairs to return to her original intention in salvaging what she could from her dejected little sister, but was stopped yet again by another knock upon that infernal front door. You have got to be kiddin’ me! Irritated beyond imagination, Applejack spun around and flung the door open a little too violently than was required. “Damn it! Ah told ya to go away!” Applejack’s eyes widened as her angry snort hitched in her throat as she stood petrified at the door. Twilight Sparkle stood before her looking a little startled, if not a little hurt at Applejack’s outburst. “Oh… I didn’t… I’m sorry, I’ll go, maybe this was a bad time?” As the lavender mare turned to depart, Applejack sprung into action and quickly stepped onto the porch, closing the door behind her as she did so. “W-wait! Ah didn’ mean to shout at you, Twi’... it’s just we’ve been havin’ some… pretty strange ponies knockin’ on the door recently and it is jus’ startin’ to get to me, that’s all. Ah apologize if Ah startled you.” Well, Ah technically didn’ lie there, but it still don’ feel righ’. Twilight smiled sincerely back at Applejack, nodding her head with a slight giggle. “That’s okay, Applejack. I get door-to-door salesponies as well. They can be quite infuriating at times and very much obtrusive in their jobs, so I understand.” Okay… this is my chance. Granny, Mac and ‘Bloom are all inside an’ the walls are pretty thick, so... It’s now, or never! Rubbing at her neck, Applejack avoided Twilight’s eyes as a fierce blush overwhelmed her face. “Listen, Twi’... about th’ other day…” The lavender's smile faltered, but remained nonetheless. “That is what I came here to talk to you about. You left so suddenly you never gave me a chance to process what happened.” “Y-yeah… sorry, Twi’, Ah jus’ kind of needed to run away, you know? Ah felt like what Ah d-did to you was…” Why is my mouth so dry? Ah’m gettin’ nervous. Don’ stop, AJ. You have to get through this. Blinking, Applejack looked to the hoof that was gently nestled upon her shoulder. Bringing up her gaze, she stared deep into the amethyst coloured eyes gazing lovingly back at her. And she lost herself in them. Those pools of crystal, so magnificent in their formation of hues; mixed with pinks and purples to elude to the colour of glorious amethyst at a distance… but up close? It was all so captivating. And just like before, she felt her lips longing to press against Twilight’s mouth once more and to taste those Palma Violets. Ah… want to kiss her again… so badly. “It’s okay, Applejack. I understand completely.” That brought Applejack straight out of her admiration of Twilight’s eyes, shaking her head a touch to shake away the spell she was knowingly placed under. “Y-you do?” Applejack tried not to sound too disbelieving, but the concept that Twilight understood what the kiss meant was... Does that mean, she liked the kiss? Does that mean—Ah have to be dreamin’. This better not be a dream or Ah’m gonna buck somethin’ real hard when I wake up! Twilight blushed as she looked away, lowering her hoof from Applejack as she shifted nervously on the spot. “I’m just so glad you came out to me. I didn’t realize you were… um… that way inclined… I always figured you were into stallions.” Does that mean what Ah think it means? Is she into mares, too? Excitement pumped her blood so quick around Applejack’s body, it practically pulsated in her ears and throat. She could barely contain her smile. “N-no! To be honest, Ah’ve…” Don’ cry, AJ! Hold it in! Ah know ya’ll happy righ’ now but hold it in! “Ah’ve always felt this way,” Applejack whispered softly, “for a long time now, an’ it’s just so good to finally know that you understand my feelings.” Twilight shook her head and took a step closer to Applejack. “You should had come to me sooner, Applejack. I didn’t realize you were carrying this burden with you for so long. You hid it so well and... do any of the other girls know about this?” Applejack merely shook her head, her mind whirling with thoughts as Twilight drew closer. A lusty sensation captivated her heart and for one split second, Applejack imagined herself taking Twilight Sparkle there and then in front of her home for all to see. Whoa there nelly, hold it together, AJ, go slow now. Slow an’ steady wins the race! Twilight smiled lovingly to Applejack. “There’s no need to hide it, or be embarrassed about it, Applejack. It’s a wonderful thing and you should show it as proudly as you love your family. If there is anything I have learnt from meeting you girls, it is that no matter who you are or what you have done, I will always love you no matter what.” She… she said it. Tears streamed down Applejack’s cheeks. She loves me. Lifting a trembling hoof towards the smiling though somewhat concerned visage of her friend’s face, Applejack placed it upon her muzzle and quickly drew in for a kiss and connected with Twilight’s lips. It was short lived. Twilight, alarmed by the kiss, quickly placed her hooves up in between them, “W-w-w-wait! W-what are you doing?” Applejack blinked, perplexed. “Ah’m… kissin’ you?” Twilight took a step back, her face beet red. “B-but that is something special someponies do!” “B-but, Ah thought ya said you loved me?” Applejack inquired as she took a step forward. “As friends! I didn’t mean it like that!” Twilight placed a hoof to her lips, “I… I didn’t mean to mislead you into thinking that… oh, Applejack, did you think that I…” An awkward silence befell to the two and it lasted for several minutes before Applejack lowered her gaze from the stunned Twilight Sparkle to stare at her own hooves. “Oh.” Was all the farm pony had mustered, looking as dejected as her sister; if not more so, as tears began to fall. A gasp elicited from Twilight, as if something at just dawned on her. “Applejack the reason why you kissed me before wasn't just because you were into mares, was it?” Applejack simply gnawed on her lower lip to prevent herself from sobbing openly. She turned her head away and clenched her eyes shut. This isn’t how it is supposed to happen! Twilight whispered in disbelief. “You love me, don’t you?” “Twi’... I…” Applejack’s voice cracked, and she clammed up just in time to stop herself from crying over what was her broken heart. Behind Applejack, the door opened and out came Big Macintosh, looking quite confused, evidently drawn to the raised voices. “Hm? Is everything alright?” Ah have to get away! Applejack barged past her brother and up the stairs, running at full gallop to escape Twilight Sparkle and the impossibly stupid scenario her own hopes and dreams put her in. Ah never should had kissed her! Applejack ran into her room as she heard another set of hooves chasing her. “Applejack!” Ah’m so stupid to think Ah even had a chance! Turning, she bucked the door closed and pressed herself up against it as a desperate array of knocks came along Twilight Sparkle’s pleading voice . “Applejack, please open up!” Leave me alone! “G-go away!” Applejack sobbed, unable to restrain her emotions any longer. “Please, Applejack!” Twilight’s voice trembled, as if she too was ready to break down as well. “We can talk about this! If we just sit and down talk, I am sure we can—” “Go away! P-please!” Stop torturin’ me with your voice! “Applejack! I’m your friend! Can you just—” “I hate you!” W-what am Ah sayin’? “Y-you don’t mean that,” Twilight replied, her voice pained as if she had just sustained an injury, “Applejack, you don’t mean—” “Ah-Ah don’t want to be your friend anymore!” How do Ah constantly screw this up? Why can’t Ah have the one Ah love?! Why can’t it be easy?! As silence soon followed, Applejack could just about hear an erratic, shaken breathing coming from behind the door just barely audiable above her own sobs, to which tried desperately to restrain in vain with her hooves. “O-okay…” Twilight said, her voice unusually calm. "I-I’ll go.” If Applejack’s heart could had bled harder, it would had done. Upon hearing Twilight’s departure and her hoofsteps growing faint, the finality of the front door closing downstairs caused Applejack to restrain her grief as best she could until she could no longer resist it. She wailed.