First Chap
A young girl with blonde hair and farmer's clothes was walking through a farm, it was a magical farm where it has a dimensional portal to another dimension in the sky. She looks up and a flying pony with a blue mane and a pink body smashes right into her. Megan shudders at the epitome of impact, the pain was so great that she screamed for a second.
"What the fock didja do that for you wanker!" said Megan to the dizzied out equine.
The pony that flew from the sky stood up from her body and shook her head in comfort.
"Hey there monkey face! We-we-we... we gotta save the fuckin universe..."
"What the fock are you tauking aboout, You drunken hoarse! Get the fock out of my faurm!" said Megan angrily.
"No you get out of... Firefly's farm!" said Firefly as she shook dizzily.
The two stared at each other for a few moments, before Firefly came close for a sloppy kiss. Megan stood back before slapping her shit in the face. The Pony rolled down the hill joyfully with a drunken stupor, then, she remembered her mission. She climbed up the hill until she made it to Megan and eyed her dizzily.
"We got to save the ponies in my world! You like ponies right little man?" said Firefly drunkenly.
"What the fock you sey!? I'll gabber your gabber in the gabber you gabber!!"
Ignoring the threat, Firefly went under Megan's pants and they flew into the sky while she screamed horribly. Firefly flew up into an empty slice of dimension in the sky and went into a sunny magical land. She landed and there were other horses around her and she felt how really weird this was.
"Who the fock are you hoarses!? Why the fock am I ere in the firs place!?" said Megan demandingly. The horses all looked at her and began to bow down like she was some kind of messiah, chanting her name in rhythmic ohms. All except Firefly who was busy drinking some liquor that were labeled with XXX Whiskey.
"Weil! Thats moar loik it! Soamething my moam should do moare for me and praise my brilliaunce." said Megan happily.
"Hey, slut, you still gonna have ta fix our problems... or something." said Firefly in between bottles of Whiskey.
"Stop drankin you caullaous whoure, you'll get a wicked bad tommy ache." said Megan.
Then, a crackling spelled doom in the sky as evil green troll men with wings and a scorpion tailed furry beast began flailing his arms, bending it backwards in impossible ways, distracting the ponies as one by one the trolls took them away. Even Megan could not look away from such beautiful and entrancing flailing, especially with the random babbling. He stopped flailing around with those long arms of his and bowed while a heavily drunk Firefly and bedazzled Megan started clapping.
"Thank you, I am Skorpan and will be on my way now!", He flew away into the sky with those big bat-like wings of his. Megan turned around to notice that a one-third of the pony population had disappeared.
"Ey! Where all dem stoopid focks go?" said Megan.
"Oh! They must have been taken by, uh, uh... Talrec the evil guy? Yea thats right." said Firefly.
"Wiel, wut aure yoo waiting four? Lets gou save them!"
"I don't wanna." said Firefly.
"You wot mate?" Megan came close to Firefly and got on top of her and pulled her hair up to make her fly. "Fly stoopid hoarse! Fly!"
Firefly neighed in pain and started flying while the remaining ponies followed in suit. They soon made it to the watery shore to get help.
"Whaut the fock is your problem taulking hourse!? Why aure we goin in the watah!?"
"Just some friendly watery horses, they sell the best water weed."
"Whaut in gouds grey urth!? You a focking draug addicte as well!?"
"Well, I also am kinda a slu-"
SHOO BEE DOO SHOO SHOO BEE DOO!!!!
The horrid abominations that came from the sea looked like horses, but with fins and fish tails, it was a sight that only a children's cartoon show would even take seriously. Megan looked at their bodies as they sang, and she threw up a bit in her mouth. Then, she looked again and threw up a massive load of vomit that shot far enough to hit one of them in the face. They ignored this treatment from Megan and continued to sing their siren song that really didn't do anything.
"Oy, Mate! Whouy aure dese hoarses focking senging! It's urtin ma ears!" said Megan as she wiped her mouth of vomit with her hand.
"They are saying hello!" said Firefly drunkenly before taking a swig out of her whiskey.
Sea ponies came to shore and their voices changed into something akin to a satanic demon.
"Take this fabled Megan, you will need this shell that has the ability to call us when in need." said the Sea ponies in tandem. They went back into the sea while giggling evilly until there was not, but a trace. Megan got on Firefly's back and kicked her in the rear to make her fly with the other ponies trailing behind them.
Will our heroes save the day from evil and bad guys! Will Megan finally save the ponies from whatever is going on? Will Firefly finally confess her feelings that she has held deep inside for Megan? Will I, the narrator, finally get some more screen time in this story? Stay tuned until NEXT CHAPTER THAT I BET YOU WOULD LOVE TO WAIT FOR WOULDN'T YOU.