I'm gonna cuddle you. And you're gonna enjoy it!

by Shin Guyviroth

First published

A young undergraduate is subject to being the target of cuddle-driven ponies. Things can only get worse (and snuggly) from there.

Author Note: This is something new I wanted to try. Contains 10% human, 90% ponies, and 100% fun-filled, cuddlelicious goodness. Not suitable for those allergic to cuddles. Please consult your physician before reading.


A young university student suddenly finds himself thrown from his homework studies into a land filled with more colour than Gears Of War, talking ponies with ridiculously huge eyes, and topped with so many cuddles that it makes Care Bears look like Michael Myers.

And for some reason, all of them come to the conclusion that he must be smothered in cookies and cream-delicious cuddles.

For some, it's heaven; for Jamie, it's his own little plane of hell that makes even Satan feel torment.

Inspired by Forced Pony Cuddles


Yay! Thank you guys so much for getting this fic in the featured box! You all deserve huge amounts of cuddles. And you're gonna enjoy it!

Chapter 1 - Twilight Snuggles

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Well, things couldn't get any more dour than this. My jeans are stained with dirt and grass, my favourite T-shirt has got grubby hoof prints all over it, and I've lost my comb. And on top of all that, I'm now sat behind stacks of hay on my butt, hiding from a pony who wants to give me more hugs than a Care Bear.

Oh. Sorry. Am I going too fast? I'll back up a bit.

My name's Jamie. Once upon a time---about an hour ago, to be precise---I was a twenty-four year old aspiring computer technician graduate at my nearby university. Now I'm a twenty-four year old human on the run from a pony who's ambition is now to smother me with hugs.

Now, I'm no professor of coding, but I'm fairly sure a broken JavaScript line or a messed up C-Sharp code doesn't smother you in a blinding light and send you to a fantasy land. And somehow, that's exactly what happened. Oh joy.

Today has been hectic so far. Here, let me tell you all about it…


Despite light having no mass, that bright flash somehow knocked me backwards from my desk on my office chair, wheeling me along the floor until I fell back arse over head. But when my head hit the ground, it wasn't as hard an impact I thought it would be. It was… soft? Weird. Concrete shouldn't feel like hitting a pile of marshmallows.

When my eyes finally adjusted, I found myself outside! How in the queen's underpants did I end up from inside my room to outside in a field? I looked down to see that a nice big flower bed of purple, blue, and yellow flowers cushioned the fall.

Wait. Cushions. Hang about, where did my chair go? It was right here!

HERE!

How did my chair disappear when my cheeks were firmly placed on it not a minute ago?

And my clothes! My newly-bought grey jeans and exclusive Diablo Three shirt were now covered in dirt and grass stains! That's just bloody typical, isn't it?

"Are you okay there?"

A voice snapped me from my inner raging monologue. A female voice. Sounded pretty cute, too. Sluggishly I turned to face to meet hers. I bet she looked really---

"You don't look so good…"

... Well, colour me surprised in fifty shades of what-the-hell. A talking pony.

At least, that's probably how I should have reacted in hindsight. Instead, I screamed like a little girl, tried to scramble to my feet only to keep slipping on the flowers, and eventually found the courage to pluck one of them from the bed and thrust it out in front of me like a magic wand, waving it like I was holding back a lion with a sword in hand.

What an utter knob I must have looked.

"You stay away from me!" I yelled as the flower between my fingers swayed in the breeze. But that pony, with her lavender coat, striped indigo mane, feathered wings, huge horn, and those huge judging---but mostly confused-looking---eyes, just kept gazing at me. It was like she hadn't seen a human before or something.

"You're not from around here… are you?" she asked.

So she hadn't seen a human before. Which means… I'm the only human here?

Emotions ran through me like a crashing wave, blasting my mind under a torrent of thoughts and feelings. I felt awkward, unfamiliar of my surroundings -- I was familiar with nothing and found comfort in even less.

"Where--" I jumped to my feet quickly, never taking my eyes off of this unicorn-pegasus-pony… thing. Oh, and I was still holding tightly to the flower. "Where am I?" I asked, flustered. My eyes shifted in their sockets, catching glimpses of everything around me, most noticeably the thatched-roof houses that looked like they were from the Elizabethan era. Then I saw the huge tree house behind her. It looked… so awesome.

"You're in Ponyville," she replied with a cheery smile. "But, uh… Why were you rolling in the grass? Did you have a spider on you?"

I couldn't tell if she was being legitimately curious or making wisecracks. But as a dignified, positive, tax-paying citizen, I had to give her a good and honest answer.

"Because I love the smell of flowers and wanted to try and rub the scent all over my clothes." Judging from her sudden shift of expression, I realized that she wasn't trying to goad me. In fact, I don't think she understood the sarcasm. Either that, or she just didn't have a very good sense of humour. "I'm joking," I assured her, "I…" I paused. I wanted to explain to her what happened, but even I didn't know what happened. "I fell over," I simply put.

"Oh, that makes sense."

… Huh? It was that easy was it? But I noticed she looked down at my feet before pointing at them with her leg.

"Your shoes are untied. You should really tie them up before you go walking around outside, you know. You could hurt yourself."

For someone---uh, some-pony---who I had only met for a minute, she was really nice. I guess she was pretty cute, too. Y'know, as far as ponies go. "Oh. Thanks," I uttered before kneeling down to do them up.

Real smooth, Jay. Real smooth…

"Gosh, you're filthy," she declared. "Why don't you come inside and we'll get your clothes cleaned."

Hold on. That means… I have to take my clothes off! In front of her? How long would I be without them for? How long would I have to stand around in my underwear for?

She wasn't planning on washing them, too, was she?

"Oh… Okay," my lips poured out, despite the panic attack my brain was having. Sometimes I think my brain wished it had arms so it could punch me in the mouth.

I had no choice but to follow her into the huge tree house behind her; I guessed that it was her home. And what a huge home it was, too. More than anything else though, I was captivated by the huge amount of books that lined the bookshelves that spanned the circular walls. I think the pony caught a glimpse of my interest -- she was incredibly keen on telling me all about her book collection.

We talked for what felt like hours, but it didn't even break half an hour. I had learned quite a bit from this pony -- Twilight Sparkle, her name was. I was told that I was currently in Ponyville, a small town in a land called "Equestria". I was starting to see a pattern in the naming of things here. She told me about its founding between the Unicorns, Pegasi, and Earth ponies, and how it is ruled by two other princesses; Princess Celestia and Princess Luna.

""Other" princesses?" I asked her. "What do you mean?"

"Oh, I'm a princess, too."

For a moment, I was waiting for something. I hadn't a clue what I was waiting for, though. Something… more? The way she said it, she made it sound like it was no big deal.

"That's… awesome," I responded. Even I made it sound like it was no big deal.

At this point, both of us had completely forgotten about the reason we were here in the first place. At least I wasn't gonna strip naked in front of a princess now.

"I've got an idea," she said abruptly. "Why don't we be friends? If you're going to stay in Ponyville for a while, you should get to know a lot of the ponies here."

If I was gonna stay anywhere, Ponyville would be the last place I would pick as a vacation spot.

But then Twilight moved closer to me, a huge smile on her face. "So that means I get to give you a new friend cuddle!"

… What did she say? A… cuddle?

"U-uh, Princess---I mean, Twilight---I… I don't think that's very, uh, befitting of royalty to hug a dirty commoner like me." I had to think of something. Anything.

"Pfft, what year were you born in? The Archaic period? There's nothing wrong with cuddles. So… Cuddles it is!"

Her forelegs swung open as she lunged forward at me. I panicked! Without thinking, I swung around to the side of her and, almost in slow-motion, I watched her tumble forwards like she was part of some sort of one pony trust test. With a thud, she planted her face onto the wooden floor.

I prayed to whatever god was in this land that my head wasn't gonna roll.

Sluggishly she pushed her body off the floor. I low groaning sound rumbled from her throat. Her head spun around, and her eyes pierced me like thorns. "W-what was that all about?" she hurled at me, rubbing her snout with a hoof.

"I'm sorry, Twilight," I apologized as much as I could convey with an awkward smile. "I just… don't think it's right, that's all!"

She stomped towards me. Slowly. I had this imagine of a lion stalking an antelope in my head. The only difference was that she was going to cuddle me to death.

And then she said something horrible. Terrible. It was a threat like none I had ever heard before… And it scared me.

"I'm going to cuddle the hay out of you, Jamie… And you're going to enjoy it! Now come here!"

I screamed out loud as she broke into a gallop. I ran and I ran as fast as I could around the room, trying to outpace her, but she was just too darn quick! I tried to use what little agility I had, vaulting over the tables and sliding under a desk to try and get past her. I even picked up one of the chair and held it out in front of me like a lion tamer! For a moment it seemed to work! Then quickly the chair was wrenched away from me and tossed to one side, pulled from my grip by some invisible, violet-glowing force.

So she can use magic, too? That's so unfair!

Every time I tried to make a bee-line for the door, she would jump in front of me. But I couldn't keep up this run-around game of cat and mouse; I was breathing heavy, with sweat dripping down my brow and my cheeks getting flustered. She was just gonna keep going until she wore me out. I think even she knew that she was gonna outlast me.

I tried to do the next best thing. I turned on the spot, nearly slipping and falling on the smooth floor, and made my way up the nearby staircase. Without a skip of a heartbeat, Twilight was already hot on my heels, only a step behind me. As leaped up the staircase, flinging herself at me as she managed to wrap her hooves around my leg.

But that was all the grip she could get. No fingers, after all.

With whatever strength I had in my legs, I pushed off the steps, letting my leg slip from her grasp, and I vaulted myself over the banister, slamming hard on the ground that I could almost feel my ankle snap. But with the cuddle monster halfway up the steps and me back on the ground floor, I bolted! I bolted as fast as my aching legs and my sore ankle could carry me! I was so close to freedom! I grasped the handle, flung open the door---

*SLAM!*

The door slammed in front of me! I tried to open it, used all my might to pry it open, but it wouldn't budge. I turned to see Twilight grinning at me as she finished descending down the last step. She held the door shut and turned the key in the keyhole, locking me in!

"Accept your defeat, Jamie!" she exclaimed. "You will accept my new friend cuddle!"

I lost. In the end, despite all of my effort and all the strain I had to put on my body, it just wasn't enough. I was out-smarted, out-paced, and out of energy.

My hand slipped from the handle, and I let out a soft sigh. I had no choice. I had to face my fate without mercy. I was to be cuddled with great force and with great affection from Her Majesty…

Or so I thought.

As I turned to her, I saw it! I saw my saviour out the corner of my eye.

"… I won't ever accept your cuddle!" I cried out with a huge grin. Quickly I snatched the key from the keyhole and ran towards the far side of the room. With whatever energy I had left, I jumped and dived forwards through the open window, tumbling head first into the small bushed just outside.

I was free! I had won! And most importantly, I didn't get cuddled!

Scrambling as fast as I could to my feet, I pocketed the key in my hands and sprinted away from the tree house. With renewed energy and a smug on my face, I ran as fast as I could.

But not before hearing the princess scream behind me.

"I'll find you, Jamie! You can run, but you can't hide from me! Do you hear me!?

"I WILL HAVE MY NEW FRIEND CUDDLE!"

Chapter 2 - Apple Bucking Season

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Have you ever had that feeling when you've been running for so long, for so hard, that you can't feel anything in your body? That you can't even feel your own lungs inflating and deflating as you breath? That your lungs are filled with so much carbon dioxide that you don't know if you're exhausted or just as high as a kite? Well, that's pretty much how I felt.

If that wasn't bad enough, all eyes were on me as I ran through the streets. Everywhere I looked I saw pony after pony. And they all had their huge, googly eyes on me, each one staring at me in anything from confusion to shock to what-in-the-flying-fluff-kind-of-monkey-is-that?

But I was finally in the clear. After running for minutes, I came across a small, white, wooden bridge. As I slumped my whole body against one of the posts, I looked back. I was away of the village. More importantly, I was away from her -- that apocalyptic monster of bestial, cuddly wrath who was now long behind me.

"Where did you go!?"

… Or maybe not. I guess locking her in her own home wasn't exactly gonna last for very long.

I panicked. Even though her voice was quiet, distant from me, I knew that it wasn't gonna be that way for long. I painfully picked myself off the post, took in a deep breath of air, and jogged as much as I could over the bridge. As each heavy step thudded against the lumber, I felt aching pains shoot up though my feet and legs, each one threatening to make me stumble.

As my aching feet carried me over the steep hill, I was greeted with the site of a huge farm, but it seemed completely deserted. There were no animals and no one working in the yard. Well, now that I think about it, it's probably animals who work the farm anyway. No doubt the place was run by other ponies.

"I know you're around here somewhere!"

Her voice was getting closer. Louder. More determined. I lost my footing and stumbling, tumbling arse over head down the hill before finally coming to a halt as I laid in a heap of flesh and stained fabrics. Hurriedly I picked myself up off the dirt and ran towards the farm gate and vaulted over it with a spring in my heel, although said heel got caught in the gap between the fence posts and I ended up planting my face in the dirt below.

But I couldn't stop there. I scrambled once more to my feet and hurried to a nearby stack of small bales of hay. Shifting a couple to the side, I pried open a gap just big enough for me to shift myself through. Squeezing my skinniness through, I quickly closed the gap and huddled myself behind the lot of it.

This will all blow over in a while…


And that's how I ended up here. Yeah, it's been one long and extremely tiring day. I'm a man of the world and all, but getting chased by a pony princess like it's a Friday the 13th movie isn't exactly my cup of tea.

Still, this will all be over soon. All I gotta do is sit here for a little bit until I can come up with a plan, and then--

"Guess ah better get to work movin' all this hay…"

--start wondering how this day can possibly get any bloody worse.

I heard a muffled voice from the other side of my hay fortress. It sounded… what's the word…? Bumpkin-y. Sounded pretty tough, too, despite being noticeably female. I just hoped that whoever it belonged to wasn't just as fierce.

One of the bales on top suddenly jerked away from me, moving forwards. Then a second time. The third time, it tumbled out of view behind the other stacks, hitting the ground with a rustling thud. Another bale followed suit. Then another. And another. My whole hiding spot---my fortress of hay---was being demolished before me. It wasn't too long before the middle line of stacks began to fall, too.

But it got worse. A lot worse.

"Wh-what in tarnation!?" a figured on the other side blurted out.

It wasn't exactly the greatest of greetings. At least snuggle-monster Twilight smiled.

Instead, I was met with the bellow of an orange pony with a cowboy hat. At least, she looked orange to me; hard to tell as the sun shone from behind her, creating a dark silhouette. I guess she wasn't expecting a near six-foot hairless monkey that was kicked through H&M to be sitting here.

But I had to say something, right?

"Hi there--" I tried to introduce myself, only to get a face full of her hat. Before I could even so much as wave, she tossed her hat at my face and hit me square on the snozz. "Hey! What was that for?" I protested. That ruddy well hurt, too…

"Gah! It talks, too!"

And here art born a miracle. I didn't think a talking monkey was something extravagant in a world of talking ponies.

I rolled my eyes and rubbed my nose, trying to ease the pain a little. "Yes, I can talk," I responded bluntly. Slowly I got up, trying to ignore the numbing ache in my thighs. With the toe of my shoe I scooped up her hat before reaching down to grab it. "You can have this back to," I said, tossing it towards her, though not with nearly the amount of force she did. Her foreleg shot out like a bullet and caught it with her hoof before putting it back on her head.

Wait… How did she catch it with her hoof? Is her hoof magnetic? Is she, like, the Magneto of Ponyville, but with hats?

"Heh, sorry 'bout that," she apologized, a sheepish grin on her face. "Ah ain't never seen a hairless monkey on the farm before. Well, not one with clothes on. You're pretty darn filthy, too."

… Did she just insinuate that she has seen a hairless monkey here before? Things just keep getting weirder.

"So, what're ya doin' sittin' behind there? Ya hidin' from somepony?"

Well I certainly wasn't sitting there trying to hatch a shiny Beldum, that's for sure.

I took a seat on one of the stacks and told of this pony my bizarre---although epic---run-around with another pony. At first she took it as them having a crush on me, but I explained how, for some reason, she really wanted to cuddle me. Having said that, I don't think she changed her opinion of the matter.

"Why don't ya come inside?" she asked. "I'll fix yer up some o' Granny Smith's home-baked apple pie."

… Is it me, or am I having a really bad case of déjà vu?

"Oh… Okay. Thanks," I responded. Again. Without thinking. I could feel my brain clenching its fist, ready to sock me one. Regardless, I followed the orange pony towards the nearby house.

"Oh, by the way," she said, turning her head towards me, "My name's Applejack. And you?"

"Jamie."


My God, this apple pie was the BEST! I just couldn't help myself! Even though it was fresh hot out the oven, I shovelled my hand under the next slice and buried it into my face, gorging and devouring on its succulent, juicy goodness and crisp, sweet crust. Crumbs spluttered everywhere and the juices ran down my chin, but I didn't care. I wanted more.

Then my eyes caught a glimpse of Applejack. As I looked up, I saw her staring at me with what could only be described as "awe-inspired sickness".

"You sure do have an appetite, don'tchya? " she spoke with an awkward smile.

I stopped dead. I tried to regain my compose, sitting upright on the chair and wiping away the crumbs and juices from my jaw. "I'm so sorry," I apologized, though the words were still muffled by the chewed up pie mush in my mouth.

But Applejack just laughed. "Don't be! Glad to see ya enjoyin' yerself."

I was enjoying myself, but that didn't excuse me for slobbering like a rampant wildebeest.

"So, why don'tchya like cuddles, Jay?"

That was… completely out of left field. I felt my stomach turn upside down after she said it. I paused for a moment. I wanted to tell her the truth but… something was stopping me. I felt it at first with Twilight, but It didn't click with me.

I swallowed before replying, "I just… thought it was a bit awkward, that's all."

She didn't seem impressed with the reason. "Y'know, cuddles make you feel real good," she replied. "They make ya happy when yer sad, an' they can turn tears into laughter."

I guess when she put it that way, it made sense.

"Ah give amazin' cuddles, if ah do say so myself!"

… I didn't like where this was going.

I smiled, chuckling a little -- and awkwardly. "I'm sure you do," I said nervously. Quickly I slid back on the chair before standing up. "Thanks so much for the pie, Applejack. It was really great."

"If yer really thankful--"

Oh please God, no.

"--then you can thank me with a cuddle!"

What was with all the cuddling here? Did I just start a new trend or something? Or did mentioning cuddles just spark a newfound interest and application of it?

"C-can't we just leave it with a thank you and… be on our way?" I pleaded, holding my hands up.

Her scowl said otherwise. "No can do, sir. Ah think you need to experience the goodness o' cuddlin'."
Like a slasher movie villain, she crept towards me. I could almost feel her snuggly intent radiating from her. "Now why don'tchya come over here an' let me give ya a nice, big cuddle."

Quickly I dashed around the other side of the table. I had to keep my distance from her, and this was the only good way. Or so I thought; I had pinned myself near the back wall with nowhere to go but back around the table. But every time I shifted around to run, Applejack mirrored my every move with perfect timing. I had to think fast.

That's it! The pie!

As fast as my arm could move, I pied up the apple pie and tossed it at her. Not even seeing it coming, the pie tipped forwards and splattered her right in the face with a satisfying *splat*. She let out a cry as she arched backwards before falling over -- and that was the moment I needed!

"I'm sorry!" I exclaimed before rushing past her, barging through the ajar door.

Sorry? I don't have time to be sorry! I need to run like heck!

I held my hand in front of my eyes as the sun half blinded me. I swung my head from one side to the other, trying to find some way to go; I couldn't go back over the bridge to Ponyville with Twilight still on the lookout for me. But as my head stopped to look right, I noticed another dirt path that seemed to run around Ponyville. I sprinted towards it as fast as I could past the barn house, kicking up dust behind me with each step. I could feel freedom.

But not as much as I felt something tighten around my ankle as my leg kipped up.

Pulled backwards, I lost my balance and stumbled forward, falling onto my chest with only my hands to help cushion the impact. I rolled over, looking back at what just caught me; a thick line of rope like a lasso tightened around my leg, with Applejack standing several meters away from me with the other end in her mouth.

"That outta stop ya from runnin'," she muttered from her stuffed mouth. I tried hard to tug away from her, trying to jerk my leg away from her grasp, but she was just too strong. With each tug of her neck, she pulled me closer and closer towards her, dragging me through the dirt. "Jus' for runnin' away like that, I'm gonna cuddle you nice an' hard!"

No. Not like this. It was bad enough that I was gonna be cuddles by an overly cute, fuzzy pony---as good as that might sound---but now she was gonna squeeze me to death!

But I couldn't do anything. She was stronger than me, and had me prone like a wounded dog. I could do nothing but watch as I drew ever closer to her. I could see a small grin form from her lips as I got closer and closer to her… until finally I came to rest. She loomed over me like a beast would over its freshly caught prey.

Like a wuss, I whimpered.

"Give up, hon?" she mocked.

Like hell I was!

I could only do one thing, and it was either gonna work so darn well or fail so darn horribly. I caught sight of the large, towering pile of hay beside me and, with as much effort as I could, I kicked away the bottom. The pile began to shake and wobble. Applejack immediately turned, her eyes widened as she saw the pile lurch forward. I pushed my feet off the ground, rolling myself backwards and away as the pile collapsed forwards, burying her under the light debris of hay.

After untying the rope from my ankle, I clambered back to my feet. "Sorry! Again!" I cried to her. But when the pile began to shake, I knew that it was my cue to run. And so I did, towards the dirt path south.

But not before being filled with a deep sense of foreboding.

"Hey! You can't hide forever, Jay!

"AH'MA CUDDLE YOU SO DARN HARD IF IT'S THE LAST THING AH DO!"

Chapter 3 - The Great And Powerful Cuddles!

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If I'm gonna be completely honest with you guys, I was starting to get a little tired of running all the time. Well that was mainly because I really was getting tired from all the running.

As I got away from the farm, with it looking so distant behind me, I slowed my pace down into a casual walk. Deep breath after deep breath I tried to inhale whatever oxygen I could, if not for my lungs then definitely for my poor, starved brain. I felt a little sick, and my sight became blurry.

But then it hit me. As I stopped to lean my side against one of the trees, I felt a sudden blast of cool, refreshing air pass along my face, caressing my hot, flushed cheeks with a gentle touch. It was like the breath of heaven.

And then heaven screamed right in my ear from behind me.

"Gyahhh! Demon!"

I could only imagine that she was referring to me. Or rather the large, demonic face on the back of my T-shirt.

I lurched forward, wincing as her screeching voice pretty much pierced my eardrum. I turned to face whatever horrible monstrosity could bellow such a sound, and… Go on. Take a guess. That's right; another pony.

"A-a second face!" she blurted out as she shook her pointing hoof at me. She was quite extravagant-looking, though -- she was draped with a purple, collared, star-spangled cape around her blue body, along with a large wizard hat upon her head, covering her white and baby blue-striped mane. I was especially taken with the huge, sparkling diamond that fastened the cape around her neck.

Although her piercing, purple eyes made me feel like I was going to die.

"The Great and Pow---I mean, Apologetic Trixie, will put a stop to you!" As she jumped back, her horn began to glow in a veil of pale blue -- just like Twilight.

So I was gonna die. If I learned anything from playing Dungeons And Dragons, it was that Magic Missile always hits. Always.

I flinched, shooting my arms in front of my face as the glow became ever brighter. I flinched so hard that I lost my balance, falling backwards and landing on my rear, kicking up a cloud of dust from the impact. I just hoped that my hands would be enough to block a cosmically powerful and magical bolt of pure energy.

Hey, it could work. Probably.

But after a moment, I lowered my hands down. Not only did my hands lower, but so did the glow around this pony's---this Trixie's---horn before disappearing entirely. She looked up at me; her eyes were shot open and her mouth agape as she stared at me before shifting her eyes up to her forehead.

"W-what?" she exclaimed. "Why didn't my magic work?"

I couldn't help but ask. "Uh… What was it you were trying to do, if I might ask?"

She grunted as she turned her attention towards me. "I was trying to turn you into a pea, so that I---The Great and Apologetic Trixie---could swallow you whole and end your reign of terror forever!"

I think I would have preferred the Magic Missile.

"But now that my magic has failed me… I will have to resort to more drastic measures!" I was shocked to say the least; she reared up onto her hind legs, standing straight as she shot a foreleg out and pointed towards me with great temper. "if I cannot defeat you with magic, then I will turn you with love and care -- just as Twilight Sparkle turned me! Prepare to be cuddled and forgiven, beast!"

… There's definitely some sort of abundance of cuddling here, but I just couldn't understand why. I felt like cuddling here was akin to giving a handshake, and that denying them was akin to drop kicking their pet budgie.

But, hey, I'm a demon. Apparently. Better use that to my advantage.

"If you step any closer, I will---" … Um… what was I gonna do? The last time I threatened someone, I said I was going to choke them with a giant marshmallow before wrapping their corpse in bubble wrap and roll it down the white cliffs of Dover. Though creative, it wasn't exactly terrifying.

Then I looked down at my T-shirt. What would Diablo say…?

"I will tear the flesh from your bones and feast upon your succulent heart!" I growled with a toothy grin. Trixie quickly slunk back down to all fours as her gaze turned from one of determination to abject terror.

Oh, dear. I think I went a little too far.

"But I have a better idea," I tried to assure her. "How about… a contest? If you win, then I will allow you to, uh, "turn" me with your… cuddles…"

"… And what if--" she gulped hard "--what if you win…?" I could see her try to keep a brave face, but her jittering legs betrayed her true feelings.

I pointed at her chest. More specifically, at her cape. "I want that diamond of yours," I demanded. I had hoped that she would back down, turn tail and run away.

"T-then I accept your proposal for the good of Ponyville!"

Well that didn't go as I had hoped.

I didn't exactly think this through all the way. "In that case… um… I'll let you decide on the contest," I said. But I still had to look threatening. "You will need all the edge you can get before I take that diamond from you!" I snarled.

Her expression shifted from fear to confidence as she said, "Then I challenge you to a test of magic!"

… Oh, well I'm truly boned now.

Before I could even announce the start, Trixie had already begin to cast her first magic spell. The magic from her horn flowed towards and around her hat, tipping it off of her head and hanging it upside down in front of her. A small wisp of colour flowed from the hole like a stream of smoke, carrying a small bouquet of roses in its coils.

"I've no need for anything more complex than this to beat you," she jousted verbally. I didn't know if it was her trying to trash-talk me or if she was such overconfident, but I wasn't going to take it laying down.

But… how was I going to compete with that?

I guess I couldn't do real magic like she could, but I could at least fool her into thinking I can. I smirked and, reaching into my pocket, pulled out a fifty pence piece. I showed it to her, holding it up in front of me between a finger and thumb before flipping it into the air. Quickly I slammed my palms together, catching it between my hands. But as I opened my palms up… the coin was gone.

Trixie reared her head back. "B-but… disappearing spells are mid-level! How on Equestria did you---" she shook her head violently before gazing back at me. "Fine! You want to play it like that? I'll show you what The Great and Powerful Trixie can really do!"

She's "powerful", now? What happened to "Apologetic"?

I didn't spend too much thought on that as I watched her deliver her next display of magic. Somewhere within her hat she had managed to pull out several deflated balloons. Within such quick succession, each one inflated itself into long sausage shapes before twisting end bending, eventually forming little balloon animals -- a horse, a cat, and a giraffe.

I have to admit: I was really impressed with her.

"I'd like to see you beat that!" she yelled out. Okay, my impression was gone. I was gonna wipe the floor with her little party piece.

And what better way than with a follow-up trick?

"I bet you're wondering where that coin went," I asked with a smirk. I walked towards her with a smirk on my face, but she begin to back up again.

I guess looking evil was all that hard.

But she eventually kept still as I approached her as close as I needed to. I rose my hand to her, which caused her to rear back a little. I placed my fingers gently over her ear and pulled away lightly, running my fingers along the back of her ear. I held my fingers up to her, between them was the fifty pence piece.

"It was behind your ear all along, Trixie," I spoke, turning the coin in my hand before lowering it to my side.

But she was far from done. She gritted her teeth hard as she gazed up at me. Tightly she clenched her eyes before exploding in a fit of rage. "I will not be outdone by some stupid, ridiculous-looking meat bag for a demon! I will put a stop to you NOW!"

With great strength in her legs, she bounced a few feet backwards. Her horn glowed once more, but it was much more than before. The colour was more solid, it covered her horn to a greater degree, and it began to spread out more so than before.

I didn't know what to do. I didn't know what to think. I could do nothing but wait, but watch as she ground her teeth together as she kept up her spell cast.

But like before, it quickly shrunk back into nothingness. Her look of determination, focus, and anger had become one of shock, distress, and impeding confusion. "Why," she uttered. "Why can't I change you into a pea?"

I was even more confused than she was. But she was right: why didn't her magic work? Was it just the one spell that didn't work? Was she doing it wrong?

Then again, when I think about it, Twilight never used any magic on me either. Or did she try to, but realized that it didn't work? Did I just not notice her trying to cast a spell on me while I was trying to get away from her?

… Does the magic here simply not work on me?

I grinned. I had this won. "That is my greatest magic of all," I exclaimed with a smirk. "Your spells cannot affect me! You are beaten, Trixie!"

That was all there was to it. I had won. She wasn't going to cuddle me. She wasn't---

"Why can't I do anything right?"

Between my thoughts and my gloating, I hadn't even noticed. I turned my attention to her. And I witnessed something that I never, ever thought I would see.

"I'm not good at magic at all!" Trixie grasped at her hat and tossed it to the ground in front of her as hard as she could, kicking up a bit of dust as the rim flapped against the dirt. "Why can't I…"

No… I didn't mean to make her feel bad! I didn't---

"I just… I just wanted to try and help…!" Her eyes, which were once filled with frustration, quickly changed to sadness. I could see it, even from where I was standing -- her eyes began to well up with tears.

Did I… Did I do this? I didn't mean to! I would never…

"I'm no good at magic! I'm no good at anything!"

And in that instant, I did something I never thought I would do. Something I never thought I could do. Something I never expected myself to do.

And I don't think Trixie expected it either.

"Please don't say things like that," I pleaded with her as I had my arms wrapped around her. With one arm around the back of her head, I held her head against my chest with my hand on the back of it, threading my fingers through her thick and fluffy mane. My other arm wrapped around the back of her neck, it too holding her close against me.

I felt so bad. I felt so horrible. I don't know what came over me, but I just wanted to… hold her. Comfort her. I wanted to whisper into her ear about how great she was and how she was great at everything she did.

Then I felt something rush through me again. It was the same feeling as before with Applejack and Twilight. Even though my heart ached, I felt so much comfort in just holding Trixie close to me. But I just didn't know why.

I felt her tremble against my body as I held her. I could feel her tears soak into the skin on my neck and through my shirt. Even the snot from her runny nose dampened the collar of it. But I didn't care either way.

"Self-loathing is the strongest demon of all," I whispered into her ear. "Don't ever let it take you, Trixie." I just didn't know what to say. I just wanted to make her feel welcome, to make her feel that she had a purpose.

And then I felt something wrap around my waist. I looked down and saw her long limbs wrap around me, holding me gently. Her snout nuzzled and rubbed along the collar of my shirt as she sniffed and hiccupped.

"I-I just wanted to be helpful," she whimpered into my chest with a muffled voice. "Can I… Can you cuddle me…?"

Yes, Trixie. For the love of everything holy, yes.

I held her tight, nuzzling against her soft, furry cheek. I stroked through her mane slowly, petting along her head and neck with the palms of my hand. And I didn't wanna let go.

Chapter 4 - Fashion Disaster, Part 1

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I don't know what came over me. I had never felt so compelled to comfort someone before. I wasn't sure about what happened, or even why it happened, but when I wrapped my arms around her and pulled her close to me, I felt… good. No, I felt great.

I must had spent a while with her; perhaps longer than I was aware of. I wasn't about to leave her until I was sure she was gonna be okay.

I sat with her and talked with her, trying as best I could to get to know her. I admit that I was impressed when she told me that she was a one pony travelling magician. if only my job was that spectacular.

Oh, wait, I don't have a job.

But when she told me about her life when she arrived in Ponyville---her first coming and recent reappearance---I couldn't help but feel some discontent with her... and pity her. It wasn't exactly a surprise to me when she admitted her own boastful and overconfident nature, but I knew that somewhere inside her was a little hero who wanted to get out. I just hoped that she wouldn't have to go through more hardships to get to it.

I gave her a goodbye and good luck before we parted ways, with her heading out of town while I continued down the path I was on. Finally I could breathe, and my legs weren't aching nearly as much as before. Not only that, but I felt… lighter. Not physically lighter, though. It was like a huge weight was lifted from my shoulders, but I still couldn't figure out what it was.

Must have been something to do with the cuddle…

Pfft, no way!


The dirt soon turned to light a light dashing of cobblestones as I made my way to the end of the path. I wasn't sure exactly what happened but I ended up back in Ponyville -- except on the other side of it; I could see Twilight's tall tree house off in the distance. I looked around and saw a scattering of brightly coloured tents around the place, with little close-cut paths of grass stemming from all of them onto a main path that headed back to the town square.

It looked like some sort of circus or something. I edged from the path and stepped into the square, following the path as I made my way around the place. But it was the same as before, with all of the pony folk staring and gazing at me. I could feel them judging me, labelling me with their eyes and minds.

I made my way towards one of the buildings---the biggest building in the square, actually--- having to trek over a small hill to get to it. I had hoped that there was someone inside who could help me; it seemed to be quite an important-looking building if it was so much more decorative than the others… and the fact that it was a building and not a tent.

As I got to it I couldn't help but look up and marvel at its design. It looked like an extravagant circus tent, but the structure itself was visibly more stable, having actual walls as opposed to being held up by a frame. A lot of different pale and complimenting colours and patterns made the place stand out more so than anything else. It was like some sort of Barbie doll play house.

I looked up at the sign that hung upon the awning; "Rarity's Carousel Boutique" it said. I just hoped that whoever was inside was going to be a bit more… civil than the others.

But as I stepped up to the front door I felt my heart jump into my throat. This would be the first time for me actively approaching a pony instead of… well, being chased by one. And what would I even say to whoever was inside? They're supposed to be this really awesome fashion designer, and I know next to nothing about fashion; I'm wearing a Diablo Three T-shirt, for crying out loud. And it would look pretty darn rude to knock on the door, all covered in filth and stuff.

But I was here now. I had to do something. I shrugged and shook myself down, breathing out heavily as I did so. "Okay, Jay," I muttered to myself, "don't wuss out…"

I ratted on the door, hoping that the door looked more stable than the rest of the structure did. Thankfully I didn't end up putting my fist through it. I stood patiently, waiting for some sort of reply, but… nothing.

Perhaps they weren't in? Or maybe they're just busy? Maybe they just didn't hear me?

I tried once more, knocking on the door a few times.

"I'm coming! I'm coming!"

The regal, female voice was muffled, having come from inside the house, but it clearly sounded rushed. I just hoped that I wasn't bothering her.

The door opened inwards, revealing a snow white Unicorn with a very stylish, very elegant mane. Her eyelashes were thick, almost shadowing the pale blue makeup over her eyelids. Her horn radiated a very pale, soothing blue as it opened the door; all four of her legs were placed on the ground as I considered how she opened it.

"I'm sorry," she apologized as she looked behind herself. "Now then, what can I---" she stopped abruptly as her attention drew to me. As soon as her huge, blue eyes met with mine, I saw the pupils shrink into small dots. Her lips scrunched up before exploding into a gaping mouth. "Ahhhhh!" she screamed in my face before rushing back inside, slamming the door behind her.

I need to get some decent earplugs just in case this whole screaming in my ears thing becomes a bad habit.

I was stunned, if not for her voice popping my eardrums then definitely for her reaction. I couldn't blame her, though. Either way I tried to reintroduce myself, knocking on the door again.

"Shoo! Go away, you beast!"

Well that was pretty rude. Demon, sure, but a beast? That's a bit below the belt.

I tried to call out to her. "Please, Rarity," I cried, trying to reach her, "I… Uh, I need your help. I think."

With a tight chest I waited for what felt like minutes. I couldn't help but feel so awkward and so tense. As far as I knew, she could very well run out the door and chase me away with a pair of scissors. As I stood by the door I kept adding everything up, and thought about what I was doing more and more to the point of just turning and walking away.

Then the door lock clicked once more. A slight creaking sound came from its hinges as it opened slowly. Rarity poked her head between the gap, her snout just squeezing through. She gazed upon me once more, but with distinct calmness this time. I could still see her judging me, though.

"On a second glance," she began. She paused, instead conveying to me her thoughts through her expressions; her face scrunched up lightly and her eyebrow rose when she scanned me from top to bottom. "Despite your weird looks, you are nonetheless an affront to fashion and clean clothes everywhere! You had better come inside. I can see why you've come for my help."

I didn't know if I was being invited in because I was in need or because I looked like an unfashionably and unwashed tramp. In any case I wasn't gonna refuse the offer. I followed her inside before she closed the door behind me with that weird magic of hers.

"Thank you," I said, trying to make myself look a bit more sophisticated than I actually looked. "You're Rarity, right?" I asked.

"The one and only," she replied without even trying to hide her vanity. "And… what do you call yourself?"

I didn't know if she was referring to my name or my species. "My name's Jamie," I responded without putting further thought into her question.

She paused, almost as if in thought. "Jamie… Is that all? I'm a bit stuck figuring out what a "Jamie" would do. Do you have a second name?"

What a… "Jamie" would do? The more she spoke, the more confused I got. "Uh, Summers. Jamie Summers," I replied, just rolling with the conversation.

"Oooooh." her face lit up with a smile. "Now that's a good name. Jamie Summers… I bet you bring a lot of good light and cheer wherever you go!"

Girl, you don't know the half of it…

"So what can I help you with -- you know, besides your clothes being covered in filth?"

As I had before, I told Rarity of myself -- I was a human from another world who somehow got thrown into this one. I had told her how I'd been chased by cuddle-obsessed ponies all day, but that only made her snort and chuckle at my expense. Finally I asked her if she knew of anyone or anything that could help me get back.

Her answer wasn't inspiring in the least.

"Well I don't know anything about that," she admitted, "but you should go and see Twilight; she lives just down the road from her in the---"

"---Old tree house that looks like a library."

"Oh, you've met her, then?"

"She was one of the ponies who's on a manhunt to cuddle me to death."

Her eyes widened. Her lips began to tremble and curl, slowly spreading across her muzzle until it form a crude, patronizing grin. As if it was a shock to me, she then burst into laughter. "Are you suggesting that… Princess Twilight is out there looking for you? To cuddle you?"

I didn't say anything. I stared at her as she kept laughing. In my mind I wanted to make her head explode.

Her hysteria died down somewhat. "Oh… I guess she's taking Pinkie Pie's talk about cuddles a bit too far." She wiped a tear from her eye and cleared her through, obviously trying to regain her composure… but she still had that smirk on her face. "Now then, while you're here I had might as well clean your clothes. Now, if you could take them off for me…?"

I would be lying if I said I wasn't the slightest bit uncomfortable with stripping in front of a girl… even if that girl was a pony. Slowly I lifted my arms, pulling them through the sleeves of my T-shirt and undershirt. I felt my face flush with embarrassment, probably looking like a cherry at this point.

"You're taking too long!"

Before I could even reply, I felt my clothes tug away from me. My shirts got pulled over my head, dragging me forward while I felt my shoes, socks and pants get pull from under me, almost flipping me backwards if it weren't for the door keeping me balanced.

At least I got to keep my boxers on.

"Those need to go, too."

… Like hell they do!

I felt her magic tug on them as soon as I gripped the waist band. I clung on as hard and as tight as I could, trying to keep them up while she kept trying to pull them down. "No," I yelled out, "you're not taking these away!"

"I said I was going to wash all of your clothes! That means them, too!"

I felt her tug on them harder, determined to part them from my hips. With whatever strength I had in my arms I kept fighting her, wrestling against her for control over my underwear, as stupid as that sounds. Of all the girls to be adamant about taking off my underwear, it was just my luck that it was a pony.

She wasn't just content with pulling them down now. She began swishing her head around, pulling my boxers in whatever direction she dictated -- dragging me forwards, backwards, side to side, she was intent with getting them off me. I ended up nearly tripping over her stool and getting dragged across the table.

"Why are you so intent with keeping them on?" she cried out.

"What do you think I'm keeping in these!?" I yelled back.

"I don't know! Are you storing nuts in them?"

"Yes, In a manner of speaking!"

"What do you mean, "In a manner of"---" She froze in place. Her grip loosened. Then her mouth began to open slowly. "… Can you not… put "them" away?"

"No! "They" just… you know… hang there."

I wasn't sure if the thermostat broke or not, because her face began to wash over with a very bright red colour. Her lips curled into her mouth, with her biting down on them. Her eye sank into their sockets.

"I'm just… going to be over here for a while…" With that said, she took a hold of my clothes and immediately turned and walked away into the next room -- very quickly.

I had the feeling that this day was only going to get far, far worse…

Chapter 5 - Fashion Disaster, Part 2

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As troubling as everything had been up until this point, I could at least take solace in the fact that things have started to get back to being… rational. Okay, so I was sitting in the middle of a dress-maker's work place with nothing on but my underwear, but at least I wasn't getting chased for cuddles. At least not for the moment.

Though if I did start getting chased for cuddles in my underwear, then that would be the new highlight of my day -- and not a very good one at that.

With every second I spent sat like a lemon on the chair, the more anxious and nervous I began to feel. The only thing that diverted my own thoughts were the sounds of machinery in the next room. A whirling, whooshing sound rumbled through; likely that of a washing machine or a tumble dryer. I guess after everything that happened she was still willing to do my laundry.

Then I heard a rather loud splash. Like something being dunked in a bathtub. I just hoped nothing broke.

Footsteps and small dripping noises soon followed, getting closer by the second. As I turned to see what was going on, my eyes widened as I saw Rarity come through the doorway. With almost the same expression when she left, she stared at me as streams of water ran down her face and her mane, dripping onto the tiled floor.

"Um… Rarity?" I spoke slowly. I hoped that she wasn't going to explode out at me. She looked painfully… volatile. "Are you… feeling okay?"

"W-why, yes, of course," she blurted out before biting her lip. "I just needed to---just needed to cool down, that's all… Quite…"

"You have something… dripping down your face," I joked half-heartedly, pointing towards her cheek.

"Yes. I just had to… splash a bit of water on my face, that's all."

A "bit" of water? Looked like she dunked a bucket over her head.

"Listen, Jamie, darling," she said, "I'm really sorry about what happened… um… earlier."

"It's okay. Really," I replied as endearingly as I could, though it was pretty difficult to keep a straight face while half-naked. "Though it isn't every day that a girl tries to wrestle my underwear off of me."

I could almost see the steam pour off her face as she began to flush once more. "N-n-now you stop with that kind of talk this instant!" she cried out, jabbing a hoof towards me. "I was not---I didn't think of it in that manner! I was simply trying to wash them!"

I paused for a moment. Then I grinned. I think this day was going to be quite fun after all.

"Is that what you tell all the guys?" I teased with a smirk.

Rarity let out a loud gasp as she reared back, taken unawares by my taunting. "That is simply not appropriate of someone of my status and profession!" she retorted as she started glaring at me, her eyes fixating upon me narrowly. "I do not like your tone nor your choice of words, Jamie!"

"Would you prefer I took you out to dinner first?"

At that point, Rarity was done with words. Before I could even so much as chuckle at her discomfort, I was met with a very large, very powerful clobber to the side of my face. I could feel my cheek press tight against my teeth for that split moment as I was knocked from my seat to the floor. For a moment half of my face became numb before the pain set in -- rather quickly, too. I felt my eyes rolling in their sockets, with my vision blurred for a few seconds before I was able to regain it.

"You're a filthy animal, that's what you are!" I heard her cry from behind me.

I rubbed my cheek, trying to ease the pain from her right hook. "Jeez, Rarity," I mumbled past my pushed cheek and clamped hand, "it was just a joke!"

"Do you see me laughing at your rather crude and unwarranted humour?"

I wanted to say something, but she was right. I could see it in those glaring, narrowed eyes of hers that just wanted to burn me to a crisp. I did take it too far. It was clear that this style of British humour wasn't gonna sit well with the natives -- it didn't even sit well with most other British people, either.

"You're right. I'm sorry, Rarity," I said as I stood back up. "I didn't mean to upset you..."

Her expression eased greatly, turning from one of abject anger to one of equal regret. "I'm… I'm sorry, too," she responded with soft eyes. "I was wrong to hit you… I didn't hurt you, did I?"

"Nah, just caught me off guard, that's all."

Actually, it hurt quite a lot. I was surprised I could still feel my jaw. I was surprised I still had a jaw.

I sat back down once more, but I ended up turning my body away from her, still feeling back about teasing her the way I did so much so that I couldn't even look at her. I heard her gentle steps move away from me ever slightly before hearing the slight skidding sounds of a chair sliding on the floor. She took a seat not too far away from me, with her body making a soft patting sound as she sat down.

"… Are you planning on staying here for a while?" she asked, cutting the silence down. "I mean, if you're going to be here for a while then you're welcome to… you know, stay with me for as long as you need."

How could she offer something like that after all that happened? I didn't know what to say. I felt uneasy. "That's very generous of you," I replied, "but… I don't know how long I'll be here for. I could be stuck here forever for all I know. I don't wanna be a burden---"

I don't know why but, when I said that, I felt my chest tighten. It was like someone just punched me in the sternum. I don't even know why it happened. It was the same as when I talked about cuddles with the others.

"Of course you won't be a burden, darling," replied Rarity, snapping me back from my thoughts. "And besides, it's not like you can go stay with Twilight -- not unless you're prepared to be crushed in her colossal cuddles. And by the looks of it--" she leaned towards my ear and whispered "--you are not prepared!"

Those four words sent a shiver down my spine. I had this vivid image of a demonic Twilight using her vast powers to pull me towards her before she wrapped her whole body around mine, crushing me in her dark embrace.

"… I think I'll stay with you, if that's okay," I agreed without further thought nor pause.

"Fabulous! I'll have to sort out some sleeping arrangements for you, but I think Sweetie Belle's room should be big enough to accommodate you, too."

I hesitated to reply for a moment. But I had to ask. "Um… Who is Sweetie Belle?"

"She's my little sister. Don't worry, I don't think she'll give you too much of a headache."

… Well bugger me with a teaspoon. Had I known about her having a sibling, then I probably would not have accepted so easily. But I guess I can't really turn back now.

"Hah, I'm sure you don't mean that," I said, trying to make some light of this rather dismal turn of events. "I'm sure she's really… sweet. And not hectic."

"She likes to offer help every now and then," she admitted, "although it's not always so… peachy."

"But you always gotta look out for your sibling, right? Even if they're a bit of a pain. Like when they keep hassling you for stuff. Or when they complain that you used all the deodorant. Or when they shave your pubes and glue them to your chin."

"… I don't know about the last part, Jamie. But the rest of it is pretty accurate. But I guess you're right, in any case. I wouldn't know what I'd do without her."

I didn't know whether to smile or not, given her tone as she spoke the last of her words. I paused as my attention drew to the whirring noise in the next room, noticing it getting quieter and slower. "Sounds like my clothes are nearly done," I said.

"Oh! I'll go put them on the radiator then. I'll be right back."

As Rarity left the room, I was left to my own thoughts -- or rather, to my own feelings. I pondered on why I was having these random pains in my chest; heartburn? Blocked arteries? Some random heart condition that was hereditary that I didn't know about?

But my thoughts were scattered as I heard a young, kind of screeching voice from outside. I didn't pay attention enough to hear what was said, but it was coming from outside the front door.

Then the door opened.

"Hey, sis! I'm home!" a little unicorn cried out as she stepped through the doorway. She looked an awful lot like Rarity, except her mane was two different shades of colour and more curly. I guess this was Sweetie Belle? She looks… so adorable!

Well, until her voice cracked.

"Hey! Who're you?" she asked, glaring at me. She then swung her head from side to side, looking for something. "W-what've you done with my sister?"

"I'm in here, Sweetie Belle!" Rarity called from the next room.

But Sweetie Belle responded with a loud, breath-taking gasp. "No!" she screamed as she galloped towards me. I flinched, rearing back as she jumped up onto my lap. "You ate my sister! Why!? Give her back!" She pounded on my stomach with her hooves like a drum, but her little beats didn't pack all that much oomph. Felt kinda relaxing, actually.

"Sweetie Belle, what's gotten into you?" asked Rarity.

"Are you okay in there, Rarity?" Sweetie Belle responded as she pressed the side of her head against my tummy. I jittered a little as her mane tickled.

"Of course I am, darling. It's a bit humid, but I can manage."

I looked down at the little unicorn. Her head slumped down my tummy and her legs went limp. I could see tears welling in her eyes. "Look, uh, Sweetie Belle? I didn't---"

"How could you eat Rarity!? What did she ever do to you!?" Once more she began to bash against my tummy, but her hits were frail and frigid. "I want my sister back!"

"Oh, for goodness sake, Sweetie Belle," grumbled Rarity as she walked out from the next room, her voice much louder and clearer, "what on Equestria has gotten into you?"

She stopped completely. She rest her little hooves on my chest before peering out from under my arm, her teary eyes meeting with Rarity's. "H-huh? But I thought… I thought that he--"

"Sweetie Belle," interrupted Rarity, "This is Jamie Summers; he is not a monster, and he did not at any point eat me. If he tried, he wouldn't have any teeth left to chew with."

True enough. I think she already started with a couple when she hit me.

"O-oh," Sweetie Belle uttered under her breath. She looked away from the two of us, wiping her eyes with her foreleg. "I'm sorry! I thought you were a monster…"

"D'aw, it's perfectly fine," I tried to assure her with a smile. I put my hand on her head, petting and playing with her fluffy mane as she smiled a little.

"He will be staying with us for… some time," added Rarity. "He'll be sharing your room. Be a dear and set up a sleeping bag for him, would you?"

"Sure thing!" Quickly she hopped from my lap and galloped up the spiralling steps near the wide of the room.

Rarity giggled as she stood next to me. "I told you she would be a hoofful," she said with a grin.

"She's certainly something," I replied.

Rarity paused for a moment before her eyes gazed down at my lap. "Your boxers have gotten wet," she pointed out.

"Probably from her crying."

"It looks like you--"

"I know what it bloody well looks like!"

Chapter 6 - Fashion Disaster, Part 3

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Finally I was back in my snuggly clothes! They were a tad stiff, having not been through a tumble drier after being washed, but at least I wasn't sitting half naked anymore. I couldn't help but fidget with the sleeves a little bit though; they felt kinda rough around the wrists.

"There you go," said Rarity gleefully, "good as new! Or if not new, then at least clean."

"I really appreciate all the effort you went through, Rarity," I responded. "You really are a great person---uh, pony."

A little hint of red around her cheeks shone through her snow white coat. "That's awfully kind of you to say, Summers," she spoke through her fluster. "What are friends for if not to help each other out?"

I was stunned. I was speechless. Why are these ponies considering me their friend after being with them for half an hour? Is it something common here? Social norm? Something that preaches that peace makes the world go around?

Why can't humans be like that?

As generous as she was, I couldn't just leave it at that. "Please, Rarity," I said, "there must be something I can do for you? Anything to repay you?"

As soon as I had asked, she began to look around the room. I followed in her stead, trying to find something that needed doing or tidying. But nothing. Folded lengths of cloth sat in neat piles upon shelving cabinets, tables and chairs were tucked under and straightened, and the lines of custom made dresses lined upon mannequins were all fit to perfection -- not a single thing stuck out.

"There's nothing that I need doing…" she paused for a moment. "If you want to help, then you can always check to see if Sweetie Belle needs a hoof with anything."

A rather small request, but nothing that wasn't worth doing. "Sure I will," I accepted. I stood to my feet and pulled down on the bottom of my shirt to get it to sit properly before making my way to the stairs.

"Shoes off, if you please," called Rarity from behind me. I gave a sigh, quickly slipping them off before climbing the steps.

I was met with light lilac and pale marble white colours as I ascended the steps to the first floor. The entire floor was wide, spacious, never feeling claustrophobic. I turned the corner as I reached the step, the floorboard creaking ever slightly with a low groan. Three doors flanked the hallway; two on the right, and one on the left. The left was wide open, letting a passage of faint light into the hallway.

Slowly I made way to it, and peered around the frame as I stuck my head and chest slightly into the room. Sweetie Belle was tucked into the wardrobe head first, squirming and wriggling to the rhythm of heavy grunts. Was she looking for something? Or was she just trying to get something out of the wardrobe?

"Sweetie Belle?" I called out. She let out a squeak as her body jumped up, her head knocking against something that loomed a little above her. She began to shift back a little, planting her hooves on the foot of the wardrobe to help her push back. With gentle shuffling noises, her head popped out from the mess. "Do you need help with anything?" I asked.

"Um… Yeah. Kinda," she responded softly. Her eyes kept shifting between me and whatever was inside the wardrobe. "The sleeping bag is a lil stuck, and I can't get it out."

I smiled, humoured by her cute, embarrassed little eyes, yet I found myself feeling a little sorry for her too. "Don't worry," I said, "I'll get it out for ya."

I scooted her over a bit to the side as I got myself down on my knees -- something I found a little bit painful after all the trips and tumbles I'd taken recently. She wasn't joking when she said it was stuck; there was so much stuff stacked on top one-another that I was astonished she didn't end up burying herself alive in it all.

Still. I am a man. I will make do -- without moving anything or in any other way making my life easier or more convenient. That is what men do.

With one arm I shovelled under all of the clothes and random bits of furniture, hoisting everything up and keeping it balanced and held in place with my forearm, while I gripped the sleeping bag with my other hand and tugged on it bit by bit. At first it wasn't budging even a little, but with each forceful pull I felt it inch closer and closer to me.

But by that time, my other arm was starting to ache. And I could feel a moth crawling on my hand.

"I'll help," Sweetie Belle said from beside me. "I'll lift the stuff up, and you pull."

"Sure thing," I responded with a smirk as I took my hand off of the rolled up sleeping bag, carefully edging it towards her with the moth still perched on the back of it. "Hold this for me, would you?"

Sweetie Belle drew her head closer but, as the little moth began to move, quickly jumped back, screeching something fierce and ear-piercing, her voice cracking as she reached a deafening pitch. The moth, equally startled, pounced off my hand and into the air, fluttering around is small, quick circles before making a winding flight path towards the open window.

"That wasn't funny, Jamie!" the heavy breathing filly cried out, totally not humoured in any way.

"I thought it was," I voiced my thoughts. "Don't worry, Sweetie Belle. There aren't any more bugs in here. I hope."

"… Fine," she huffed, likely reluctant to get close to the wardrobe again in fear of another prank. Quickly she buried her head under the pile of junk as my arm kept it up for her. Slowly I took my arm away, making sure that the load wasn't too much for her to bear. She seemed to be okay with it; she didn't strain to keep the pile up. Quickly I grasped the rolled up sleeping bag with both hands and pulled as much as I could. With each tug I felt it budge an inch or so. With a few more pulls I was able to get it a third of the way out.

"Almost got it," I spoke out. Taking a step back, I used whatever leverage I could in my arms, my shoulder, my back, and my legs to give it a huge yank. With a loud sliding sound, the sleeping bag pulled out to half way. "You can relax now, Sweetie Belle. This thing's pretty much out."

With a little grunt, Sweetie Belle let the pile fall back down with a tumbling sound as the stuff fell down behind the sleeping bag. She then gripped the front edge of the roll with her teeth, pulling it alongside me as the rest quickly slid out and onto the carpet.

"Well that was a tad bit of a pain," I uttered through strained breaths as I wiped a hand across my brow, wiping away a bead of sweat.

The both of us jumped in unison as the bedroom door slammed open. Rarity stood just beyond the frame, her eyes piercing into the room with a violent glare. "What is going on in here!?" she shouted, though it sounded more like a light scolding than anything else. "I heard Sweetie Belle scream!"

"It's nothing, Rarity," assured Sweetie Belle. "There was just a moth in the wardrobe."

Without even a thought of concern, Rarity's expression morphed back into her cheerful, lady-like manner. "Oh. Well, in that case, carry on." she sang, casually taking her leave as though nothing had ever happened.

I'm not gonna lie; she scares me. And that's without stalking me for hugs.

"Thanks for the help, by the way," said Sweetie Belle from beside me, snapping me from my thoughts, "but I think I can handle the rest."

"You sure?" I asked.

"I may be small, but I can still get stuff done." She dragged the sleeping bag to the center of the room and quickly undone the buckles that kept it compact. With a couple of nudges with her snout, the bag unrolled across the floor. "Wasn't that hard, was it?"

True enough. I expect it to be a bigger pain than that. At least that's how my own sleeping bag likes to be.

I smirked and chuckled softly. "No, I guess it wasn't," I admitted. Looking down at the white and violet-trimmed bag, I scanned it from top to bottom. It definitely seemed to be big enough to fit me inside. Perhaps a little too big. "So… Rarity said that I'll be sleeping in here with you, right?"

"Yeah. I guess…" Sweetie Belle didn't seem sure or certain. I'm fairly sure she was certain that I would be in her room for some time; I think she just wasn't certain it was a good idea.

And to be honest, neither did I.

"Not comfy with having me in your room, huh?" I guessed.

Her body froze up a little. "Well… Um… Kinda. I normally sleep by myself, and… I just dunno what to make of having a stranger sleeping in my room."

"Don't worry," I replied, petting her on her little fluffy head, "I don't actually eat ponies like you think I do."

"Hmmm… Okay." She looked up past my hand, with a small smile on that tiny muzzle of hers. And then she asked me for something that, though it didn't surprise me, I didn't think she would ask so quick. "If you're gonna stay with us… then how about a hug?"

I didn't reply -- not because I didn't have an answer, but because someone interrupted me before I could say anything.

"Hugs?" I heard Rarity's cheery voice call from the hallway. She stood at the door with a smile of her own. "Why, if you're giving out hugs then don't leave me out of it!"

I never offered hugs! Sweetie Belle was the one who brought it up!

"Hey! Maybe I'll get my cutie mark for best hugs!" Sweetie Belle cried out.

Before I could even so much as mouth an objection, I felt her little yet disproportionately strong forelegs wrap around my abdomen, squeezing whatever air I had in my lungs. She wasn't nearly as strong before when she was thumping on my tummy. As I gasped for air, I felt Rarity's own grip around my upper chest. Not only did I have no air but now I also had no blood going to my head.

I felt like I was high. High on cuddles.

Chapter 7 - Once Bitten, Twice Shy.

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As much as I was starting to get sick of the repetitiveness of getting hugged by one pony or another, I admit that I'm starting to get somewhat used to it now. It wasn't exactly something I would call enjoyable, but I was beginning to bear it better than I used to.

Though having said that, getting hugged by Sweetie Belle and Rarity on either side felt like getting smushed between two marshmallows. At least that much felt enjoyable.

But besides all of that, I was feeling more relaxed, more confident, with being around these ponies. Everyone that I had met today had been friendly---if a bit overly friendly---and were kind to me. I still wondered if this was something natural here or if I was just lucky. It didn't matter much in any case; they were still better than us humans. Still better than me.

I stayed with Rarity for a while before leaving, talking about our difference in cultures, histories, technology, and, not surprisingly, fashion. Despite trying to explain to her that my shirt was franchise merchandise, she would not budge on her stance of it looking hideous -- specifically, the large face of Diablo on the back of it. Sweetie Belle said she liked it though, much to her sister's appal.

Before I could leave, Rarity suggested that I should go see her friend Fluttershy. For a second I caught myself wondering about her odd name, and then realised that everyone here has a kinda weird name anyway. No doubt her friend was… well, shy. But when she assured me she was good with animals---in other words, thing like me--- I gave her an assured nod. If she was good with animals as Rarity had insisted, then perhaps she can help me out.

Maybe she'll give me some food. I couldn't believe how hungry I was considering I'd stuffed myself with apple pie not too long ago. I could feel my stomach grumble through the vibrations it sent up my shirt.

"Now you take care of yourself, Summers," spoke Rarity with care, waving me goodbye with her hoof, "And tell Fluttershy I said hello, won't you?"

"I'll see you later tonight, Summers!" Sweetie Belle cried out, her cute little voice cracking slightly as she called out my name.

I don't think anyone had been happy to see me come back round before.

"Yeah, I'll be back soon," I called back, giving the two a smile as I waved back. I turned to where Rarity had pointed me to go, setting off onto the footpath. "Don't wait up!"


"Just a straight path," she said. "It'll lead straight to Fluttershy's house," she said. And yet somehow in her short, simple explanation of direction, she completed omitted the part where the path splits into three routes!

If I gritted my teeth any harder than I was doing right now, they would probably shatter.

"Motherf--!" I cut myself short of yelling out such obscenities as I took the time to think things through. Three paths; one left, one right, and one dead center. If Rarity insisted it was a straight path, then… perhaps the side paths weren't originally there? And the center path was the right way?

Well I wasn't gonna get any closer to where I needed to go by standing still. I shrugged to myself as I made my way down the middle path, keeping my eyes forward and looking out for anything that resembled a house or a cottage -- or even a cave. If this Fluttershy was supposedly really good with animals, then maybe she lived like one, like a caveman. Or rather, cave-pony.

But as I made my way past a line of bushes and shrubbery, something shimmering and shining in the light caught my attention. I turned to it, watching as it fluttered ever slightly between a few of the branches. As I got closer, I saw it was a piece of paper. I reached over and grasped it, feeling its smooth, laminated texture on my fingers. Looked like a ticket or a coupon for something.

The strip was pretty long; around fifteen centimetres, and an inch and a half wide. The entire slip was a royal blue colour with silver glitter mixed in, glistening as the light shone off it. The born was quite thick, and coloured in gold foil. Three ponies were depicted in blue jump suits and goggles, suspended in mid flight with coloured streaks behind them.

"What's this?" I muttered to myself, straining my eyes to read the overly fancy, curly writing on the slip. It didn't help that the silver writing blended in with the glitter all too well. "The Wonder Bolts… Mid Summer Aerobatics Demonstration…?"

So this was a ticket to some sort of event? Sounded pretty big, what with them being aerobats and having such ridiculously lavish tickets made for it. Just looking at it made me feel like they put Rarity's dresses to shame. But what was it doing in a bush? Someone must have dropped it or something. Folding it in half, I pocketed the ticket until I could find who it belonged to. Maybe Rarity might have an idea.

It didn't take too much longer until I was greeted with the sight of something that wasn't trees. Stepping out from the end of the path, I immediately felt the light and the winds flank me from both sides. I never really thought of how claustrophobic it felt being surrounded by trees all the time until now. But as I looked out ahead, I saw more than that. I saw rolling green hills, swaying white clouds, and the scurrying and fluttering of so much birds and critters that it was like being at an animal shelter.

Speaking of shelter, I also spotted a small house on top of the rising hills. Or maybe it was just another hill. It was just so hard to tell -- the entire roof looked like it was made completely out of moss or something, with the only indication of it being a roof being the gable windows that jutted from parts of it. It even had tiny birdhouses plotted here and there.

Animals. Cottage. Birdhouses and nests everywhere. Yup, this is definitely the place.

Down the sloping decline and over the stone, moss-covered bridge, I found myself standing just shy on the little welcome mat that lay out the front. Hah, just "shy" of it. Oh, the puns. But perhaps that humour was what I needed, after giving a few chorus-like knocks on the front door. I had completely forgotten just how nervous I actually was as I stood waiting for an answer, contrary to what I thought earlier.

I think at this point, out of the two of us, I was the one who was gonna be the most shy.

A click sounded, and the door slowly swung inward, giving me a sudden glimpse of a part of the pony that stood just beyond it. The more the door opened, the more of the equine's body was revealed -- almost like the unveiling of a prize on a quiz show. When the door finally opened fully, I was greeted to the sight of a buttery-yellow pegasus, with long, baby pink hair that curled and folded over half of her tiny snout.

And my God, those eyes! Those bucking adorable eyes!

"H-hello?" she spoke softly, like a gentle whisper. "How can I--?" but she immediately paused her words as her big, thick lashed eyes caught up to my face. In those huge eyes of hers I could clearly see her pupils shrink back in fear. And that fear was only too quick to confirm itself as she let out a quiet yet shrill squeak as she slammed the door in my face.

As much as that was happening quite recently, it was definitely not something I was going to get used to any time soon.

But before I could knock again, the door began to open once more, though a tad slower this time. And this time, the shy pegasus peaked out from the small gap as the door was slightly ajar. I gave her a quick glance as she stared up at me and, after a brief pause, she fully opened up.

"I-I'm sorry about that, mister monkey," she apologized rather abruptly. "I didn't mean to be so rude to you. I just… haven't ever seen anything like you before."

… Now how the hell was I supposed to not accept an apology from someone so cute and innocent as her?

But I didn't really wanted to be known as a monkey, either. "Uh, I'm not--"

"Oh, my!" she exclaimed after a sudden gasp. "You can talk, too! I didn't know there were any monkeys around here who could talk!"

"Please, I'm not a--"

"Oh my goodness!" She quickly stepped towards me, and lifted one of my hands with her hoof. "W-what happened to all of your hair? Did… Did somepony shave it all off!?" The tone of her voice was like a heartbroken mother, trying to hold back her tears and her anger. "Who would do such a thing to a poor, little creature like you! Well, at least that had the decency to give you some clothes to keep you warm."

This really wasn't going anywhere fast -- or if it was going somewhere, it was somewhere I wasn't the least bit comfortable with. "Fluttershy," I called out. I quickly got her attention. "I'm not a monkey. Kind of. And I'm naturally this hairless. I'm called a 'human'."

The puzzled pegasus looked up at me, as if I was making everything up. Or maybe she was just taking it what I just said. It was hard to tell. "You're a… human…? I've never heard of one of those before."

"I'm… Uh, I'm not from around here." Her confused washed away when I clarified. Perhaps she only knew about animals native to Ponyville and Equestria as a whole, as opposed to any other neighbouring countries. "Listen---Rarity said that you might be able to help me?"

"U-um…" Fluttershy looked away from me for a brief moment before she said, "I… don't really know an awful lot about humans…" She sighed softly, and then closed her eyes. "Actually, I don't know anything about humans. But you can stay with me for a while, if you'd like? I'll take good care of you until I can think of something, little human!"

I felt pretty bad for her. Must kinda suck being this really knowledgeable person, and yet being absolutely powerless to use it to help someone. I just had to cheer her up. "I can stay for a while," I said to her. Immediately her eyes lit up, and a cute smile sprawled across her lips. "But I can't stay, you know, all day. I said to Rarity I would be staying with her."

"That's okay," she responded as she took my hands in her hoof, pulling me, leading me into her cottage. She gave a quick glance over her shoulder as she heard a familiar rumble coming from me. "Oh, you must be hungry. I'll feed you. Don't worry."

Huh. Someone leading me into their cottage with promise of food. Last time I heard of that happening, it was to fatten up two little lost children.


But I just couldn’t stop eating! I didn't care what any of this stuff was, so long as it tasted as good as everything else did. I saw everything as just morsels to sate my hunger, but I recognized some of it; slices of apple, orange, and raw vegetables that I would have probably turned down in a heartbeat if I wasn't so famished. I wasn't really one for fruit and veg -- much too healthy. Give me a bacon double cheeseburger any day.

"O-oh! I'm glad you're… enjoying it," I heard Fluttershy squeak from behind me, though just barely over the sounds of my squelchy chewing and swallows. I gazed back up at her, and felt a sudden burning feeling in my cheeks. Again I found myself ravaging the food laid in front of me, just like at the farm. I quickly composed myself the best I could, sitting up straight and using the little white napkin to clean all the fruit juices around my mouth.

"I-I'm sorry," I stuttered through my embarrassment. "But I was just so hungry. Thank you for the food, Fluttershy."

And then she gave me the most adorable, loving smile I'd ever seen. "It's okay, little human," she said, and then patted and stroked my head like I was a kitten. "You need to be taken care of."

And it happened again. I felt that same, sudden pang in my chest. I felt my body shift forward, lurching ever slightly as my right hand involuntarily shot up and clenched where my heart was. I felt it racing, beating quickly like I'd just ran a marathon.

Just what the hell is happening to me…?

"A-are you okay?" I heard a gentle whisper against my ear. Just hearing her voice made me relax -- made the pain go away.

I inhaled for a moment, and then exhaled. "I'm fine," I said to her through a forced smile, glancing over to her as she stood close by my side. "I've just… Nah, it's nothing." I waved my hand, dismissing whatever this was as probably a lack of good exercise, or stress and aftershock of winding up here.

"No, it's not 'nothing'," she exclaimed forcefully. It was pretty weird seeing her become so adamant all of a sudden. "We need to get you some help. And--"

I felt something running along my back. I've felt this before. It was one of her hooves.

"--I said I was going to take care of you, you poor--"

"No, you're not!" I bolted from my seat, just before she could wrap her foreleg around my chest. "L-look, Fluttershy, I'm really grateful for everything you've done to me---truly I am---but I just don't… Could you not cuddle me?"

I saw her eyes drop all of a sudden. Her lower lip jutted out, like she was pouting. "B-but… don't you… love me?"

Oh no. It's just as I feared the worst. One of these ponies has fallen in love with me.

"Yes! I mean, no!" I shook my head. "Fluttershy, I like you and all, but… things just won't work out!"

"But… why? We can be happy together! And you can stay with me, and I'll take good care of you, and feed you, and clothe you, and bathe you--"

"Fluttershy!" I snapped all of a sudden. I couldn't take in everything she was saying. Everything was just so damn nonsensical right now. "I'm really sorry, Fluttershy, but… I just can't love you."

She reared back. Her wings slowly unfolded from her sides and hung low, almost lifeless. Followed by her neck, as she quickly hung her head low and gazed down at the floor. All I could see were her pointed ears and her long pink mane as it sprawled out onto the floorboards.

I think… I think I might have just broke her. "Fluttershy…?" I murmured, taking a step closer. "Are you… okay?"

I heard her whimper a little, almost like a gentle sob. I felt so bad that I just wanted to wrap my hands around her and hold her close, and tell her everything would be okay. But what I got instead was something I never expected. Something I never wanted. Something that filled me with overwhelming, choking dread.

"N… No…!" I heard her gasp. Quickly she looked up at me, glaring at me with a furrowed brow and grim eyes. "No! You will love me! And you're going to accept my love and my cuddles!"

Oh God. Now she was borderline psychotic. And she was probably going to do things to me that I wasn't going to enjoy, alongside the cuddles.

I panicked. I grasped at the back of the chair I was sitting on, and swung it across the floor to try and halt her as I dashed towards the door. But all I ran into was a fluttering Fluttershy as she blocked my advance. I stumbled back, tripping over a tiny raise in the floorboards and landed on my rear. All I could do was gaze up at the now towering pegasus as she loomed over me on all fours.

"I'm gonna feed you! I'm gonna clothe you! I'm gonna bathe you! I'm gonna take care of everything you need!" Every time she spoke I felt my throat clench. I wanted to say something, but… I was just too intimidated by her. I didn't want to say anything to pushed her over the edge. Then she pushed her face closer to mine, until her nose pressed against mine. "And you're going to love me!"

But as she reared her head back, I felt something flop against my shoulder. It was pretty thick, with little flower patterns on it. Then I remembered: Fluttershy's table cloth. I could use it to get away… maybe.

"Now, you're going to accept my cuddles," commanded Fluttershy. She drew ever closer to me until she stood almost over my sitting body. Her arms reached forward, and…

Now!

My arms shot up, and gripped the corners of the table cloth that hung over me. With all I could, I yanked it forward like I was performing that age-old trick of keeping everything on the table. Except that's not what happened. Plates and bowls and other pieces of crockery struck the floor with loud crashes as the cloth flung over me. I let go of the corners, trying to fling it as hard as I could over my head and onto the crazy pegasus. She let out a gasp as the cloth landed on her, stepping back and nearly falling over herself if it weren't for the fact she had two more legs to keep her stable.

But I couldn't let it stop there. She could quickly catch up with me with her wings if I tried to run. So I charged at her, wrapping my arms under her and tried to pull her to the ground -- which, actually, wasn't as hard as I thought. I pulled her down onto her side and, grasping a couple of the corners of the cloth, tied her up in it as she began to squirm and kick out at me. Despite my exhaustion and jittering body, I managed. I clambered to my feet and, after giving the squirming pegasus a quick glance, made a mad sprint out the door and back down the path.

"… I'm so screwed," I muttered to myself over heavy breaths as I leaned on my arm against one of the trees.

And that was only ever more apparent when I heard her scream from behind me, in that distance between the path and the house.

"I'm going to find you, human!

"AND YOU'RE GOING TO LOVE ME!"

Chapter 8 - At The End Of The Rainbow

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Chased. Tied up. Challenged to a test of magical prowess. Socked right in the face. And now, almost taken advantage of by a schizophrenic pony. If there was one thing this day brought me, it was a violent tandem of wild experienced and rushed emotions. And not good ones, either.

At least the trees weren't going to try and seduce me and have their way with me. I think they were probably the only good company I had in the time I've been here -- or at least they were the least touchy-feely company I've had since I've been here.

Actually… No, I was wrong. Trixie was. I had nearly forgotten about her, what with everything going on. How could I forget about her after what I did? God, I hope she's okay…

And then I felt something hit me right on top of my head, knocking me out of my thoughts. I looked down, and saw a fairly big lump on the ground. It was an acorn -- a pretty big acorn, too. As I looked up, I saw something whizz by me, flying off into the distance, leaving only a faint rainbow trail behind it. I guess with speeds like that, it would knock even a secured bird's nest from its branches. Fluttershy wouldn't like that one bit.

I came to the end of the path, leading me right back to where I first left from. All the tents were still up, and even Carousel Boutique seemed open, too. I sighed, making my way back to it. I don't think Rarity's going to take the news too well. She'll probably just laugh at me.


Nope. She just gave me a scowl. And I think part of her wanted to give me another knock round the cheek. "Jamie Summers!" she gasped at me, exasperated. "Now, I don't know what has gone into you, but I've known Fluttershy long enough to know that she would never do something like… like that!"

"I'm telling you the truth, Rarity!" I exclaimed back at her, flinging my arms to my side. "She kept telling me how much she loved me, and how she wanted me to stay with her forever! Then, when I told her it wouldn't work out, she… snapped, or something! And then she told me that she was gonna make me love her!"

"You are just being absurd! I'm sure that this entire thing is just a big misunderstanding. And really -- you tied her up!? Why would you do such a thing?"

"What was I supposed to do? Let her just… have her way with me? It was the only thing I could do to get away from her!"

"This is simply just utter nonsense! You didn't have to go to such extremes to get away from her! No, Rainbow Dash, yes, but Fluttershy?" She growled deeply as he eyes bore into my own. But she suddenly stopped, closing her eyes, and taking a deep breath. "At least no one got hurt. Now, let's go back to Fluttershy's, and we can get this mess all straightened out."

I felt my brain freeze in my skull. Just the thought of it nearly caused it to shut down there and then. It simply could not register. "Oh, no, no, no," I replied, stepping back and waving my hands in front of me. "I am not going back there any time soon -- even if she does have adorable eyes and long, pretty hair."

For the first time since I came back, Rarity shot me a smile. Actually, no. It was more like a smirk. "Oh, Summers, I thought you didn't love her? You certainly sound like you do."

"What? No! I just---Look, I just don't think it's a good idea to go and see her right now. Or rather, for me to go see her right now. Maybe we should just let her cool off or something?"

"Absolutely not! You're going to go see Fluttershy, and you're going to apologize to her, and give her a big cuddle to show her that you mean it!"

Cuddle? Oh, God, no. Not while she was in that maniacal state that I left her in. "No chance, Rarity! That's the last thing I'm gonna do!" I turned from her and sprinted towards the door.

But the door slammed before I could reach it. "Hah! Not while you're in my home you're not! You're not--"

She was cut off with a sudden loud crash. I shielded my face with both arms as I crashed through one of the windows that flanked the front door, littering the porch of the boutique with shard of glass and strips of purple painted wood. I'd learned from Twilight that windows weren't gonna keep me locked up so long as I could jump out of them.

I tumbled forwards, catching parts of my hands on the discarded fragments of glass as I rolled over them, making small punctures and cuts on the backs of them. The pain was barely noticeable through the adrenaline as I shot to my feet and sprinted away from her.

"H-how could you!?" I heard Rarity cry from the window. But I dared not to turn back to her. "Get back here right this instant, Summers! I KNOW WHERE YOU LIVE!"

I think she just ran out of things to threaten me with.


And now I was lost. I just had no idea where to go from here. I found myself stuck between the bazaar where Rarity and Fluttershy was, and the town center where Twilight was probably still out on a manhunt for me. No, she was a princess; she probably had her guards patrol the town for her. And I couldn't take the path on the outskirts either, in case Applejack was still looking for me.

I was caught in a pincer without even so much as a hair's breadth to move in. I couldn't stay standing here either, in case Rarity decided to come out and start looking for me, too.

I guess I had only one option; to just follow the river upstream and see where it took me. Pushing off the railing of the arcing bridge, I stepped off and followed the river from along the bank.

I couldn't help but think about everything that had happened whilst walking along the edge of the river. I thought about how why they were so obsessed with hugging and cuddling me. That thought soon turned into thoughts of their overfriendliness. I just couldn't understand why they were all so nice to me despite me being a complete stranger. No. Not even that. I was completely alien to them; none of them knew what I was or where I had come from. I wasn't even from this world.

And then I thought about what I was. Who I was. And why I was so adamant about them keeping away from me when they tried to touch me.

But I knew. I knew why I was the way I was, and why I acted the way I did. And then I felt that burning pain in my chest again, searing me the more I thought about it. I don't know why it took me this long to realize it, but those pains were because of them. Maybe I just didn't want to believe it, that these sudden shots of aching pains was because of them.

How could I? How could I accept that pastel-coloured ponies that just wanted hugs and cuddle could want to hurt me this much? If they knew… If they knew…

I felt my body grow numb. Cold. Motionless. My vision blurred and became cloudy. I began to breathe heavy, unable to take in the air around me. My breaths became short and shorter. And then I felt myself stumble, falling forwards. Everything went dark.


"…ey… Hey… Hey! Are you okay…?

A scratching voice soon found their way to my ears. Ah, stupid voices, always trying to wake me up when I was having a good dream. Oh… I wasn't dreaming. Everything just felt hazy. But I just wanted to sleep a little longer.

"Come on! You can't seriously be this tired!"

Ugh. Go away…

"Well, you moved an arm, at least. Now move the rest of your body!"

I groaned as I began to slowly move my arms from where they had sprawled out in front of me. I gripped the ground below me, feeling the blades of grass between my fingers as I pushed off of my knuckles. My eyes slowly began to open. I could see the blurriness of green in front of me.

"Oh! You can move! That's it! Just a little more!"

I tried to turn my head, but the sudden glare of the sunlight only made me shoot my gaze away, back to the ground once more. But I was beginning to regain my sight, at the very least. I saw a shadow flickering as my eyes gazed up once more, still averting the light. I saw wings beating ever gently, rustling the grass with each beat. Then I began to feel the cool air wafting over me rhythmically.

"Now, look up."

As I shifted onto my knees, kneeling on all fours, I tried as much as I could. My eyes adjusted to the light, finally, as I gazed up above me. That's when I saw another pony---No, another pegasus---looking down at me as her four legs dangles down from her slender body. I gazed up at her strong, magenta eyes, and her fringe-like rainbow-coloured hair.

"You awake there, buddy?" she asked. "You've been laying there for quite a while."

I coughed, and clenched my hand to my chest. No -- the pain had gone, now. "What happened?" I blurted out through my strained throat. I don't know why I asked. I knew what had happened. "How long have I been laying here?"

"Let's see… I found you at three, and--" her head tilted back, gazing at the sky. I think she was looking towards the sun. "--It's about four now. So about an hour, more or less."

An hour? I was unconscious for nearly an hour? Just… Just what was happening to me?

"What're you doing laying here anyway?" she asked, her voice raised. "You coulda been swept away by the river if you weren't careful! Y'know, like, your body coulda rolled down the slope or something."

"Sorry." I didn't know what else I could have responded with.

She just tutted at my response, looking away. "Well, you weren't hurt, and nothing bad happened, right? Just try and be a bit more careful, okay?"

"Right. Right…" After she had finished scolding me, I rose back to my feet and dusted the dirt from my clothes. "Hey, um…?"

"Name's Rainbow Dash," she interjected. Hm… Rainbow Dash… That was the pony who Rarity mentioned when she was having a go at me.

"Right. Thanks, Rainbow Dash, for… you know. Getting me up."

"Yeah, well… I didn't need you ruining my day even more."

That seemed a bit harsh. But I had to ask. "Is there something wrong?"

"Heck yeah!" Her eyes shot out at me, burning with frustration. I didn't know if she was charging up laser beams in her eyes or if it was from the light's trickery, but I could have sworn that I saw her eyes turn a bright red. "I was helping Derpy Hooves with her mail runs, and then I dropped my ticket! I didn't even realize it until I got back to the post office! And I've been around all of Ponyville trying to find it, but I just dunno where it is!" She let out a heartful, angered growl, aimed right towards the sky. "Now I'll never get to see the Wonderbolts!"

Wait… The Wonderbolts? That was the name on the ticket I found near Fluttershy's house. I had completely forgotten to ask Rarity who it had belonged to. Rather, I didn't get the chance to. I guess it was Rainbow Dash'.

"And now I'll probably never get another ticket in time for it tomorrow!"

I placed my hand in my pocket. It was still there. "Hey, Rainbow Dash?" She turned to me, her eyes gazing at me in heartbreak. Until she saw the shimmering gold of the ticket, I suspected. "This is yours, right?"

Her eyes widened. There must be something in that head of hers, making her inner workings work, because I could have sworn I saw her eyes light up like the headlights of a car. She swooped down right in front of me, with her head jutting straight out at my hand as she pushed her hooves against her cheeks, making a pretty cute and funny kissy face.

"Ohmygosh ohmygosh OHMYGOSH!" she blurted out with ever escalating vocals. Before I could even say anything, she snatched the ticket from my hand and twirled with it in her grasp. If I blinked, I would had missed it. "B-but… Where in Equestria did you find it?"

"I found it in one of the bushes on one of the paths at the bazaar," I told her. "I thought I'd keep hold of it until I found who it had belonged to."

Her lips began to quiver tremendously. Just looking at her, I knew that it meant a lot to her. And her ever growing smile just made it all the more apparent.

But I knew that smile. I had seen it so many times today. But before I could say anything, she bolted at me, tackling me to the ground as she pushed me back five, maybe ten feet. It was hard to see and judge the distance with her huge cyan face smushed against mine, rubbing her cheek against mine as she caught me in a bear hug. "Thank you, thank you, THANK YOU SO MUCH!" she screamed.

I didn't know what was more painful: the thumping in my ears, or the bone-breaking pain in my arms and chest?

"R… Rainbow Dash," I managed to wheeze. "You're… crushing me…!"

And just at that point, she stopped. Her eyes glanced over at me. And as quickly and as suddenly as she glomped me, she shot away from me back into the air, looking away and crossing her forelegs across her chest. "I-I mean---Uh… Yeah, thanks for that," she spoke bluntly. But her flushed cheeks gave away her embarrassment. I couldn't help but smirk and snicker at her. "Hey! Don't you tell anyone about this!"

I simply nodded and smiled. "My lips are sealed. Hope you enjoy the show tomorrow."

She smiled back at me. "Hey, I never got your name," she said.

"Call me Summers."

She chuckled lightly. "Summers, eh? Well, you certainly brightened up my day!" And with that, she bolted up and towards the sky, leaving a familiar rainbow strip across the sky as she soared across Ponyville.

Perhaps I did brighten up her day. But she was the one who cast that beautiful rainbow across my darkened spirits.

Chapter 9 - Everyone Likes Sweets and Mints

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I could feel my lungs and my chest become ever so lighter, as I drew in the cool air around me. I'd never felt so good, so relaxed before. I guess getting all of that anxiety to the surface really helped a little bit. I felt like a huge weight was lifted off my chest and thrown sky high into the stratosphere.

But a tiny bit of it remained. Maybe it was because I fully understood why I was getting these pains. But now… how do I get rid of them entirely?

My thoughts wondered alongside my directionless steps. All I knew was that I was stepping foot after foot away from Ponyville, and heading towards a horizon of nothing but countryside. Didn't know where I was going, or what awaited for me at the other end, but I knew that it had to be better than those ponies.

Though what I instead found was more. Two more. I felt my head drop a little at the sight of them.

Though they were still off in the distance, I could make out their appearances. One was a light mint-green colour and with light blue-white hair, almost like Aquafresh toothpaste. The other was a very light and pale yellow, with bright pink and indigo hair that curled at the front. They were both talking to each other as they walked towards me, not even noticing my appearance.

That was until the green one turned her head. She stopped dead in her tracks and held out her foreleg in front of her friend, stopping a moderate distance away from me.

Despite them being quite far, I could hear her as she tried to whisper to the other. "Look!" she said faintly, but audibly. "Look, Bon Bon! That… That's what I've been talking about before!"

"What are you--?"this Bon Bon spoke out, not trying to keep her voice quiet as she did. But she soon fell silent as she, too, gazed at me with glazed over eyes. And I was beginning to feel even more uncomfortable. "… Lyra? Are you saying that… that is one of those humans?"

Wait… They knew what I was?

"Yeah! Just look at it!" She pointed a hoof at me, and kept moving ever slightly as she began to annotate me like a biology diagram. "Look at those arms, and those legs, and how hairless it is! And it wears clothes like we do! It's… It's totally a human!"

I didn't know what to do. I mean, how did she know what I am? I thought humans didn't exist in Equestria? And yet she knew what I was, even pointing out what made me a human. Whoever she was, she had such extensive knowledge of me that I couldn't help but feel admiration for her. Perhaps she could get me home? I just had to talk to her.

"You know what we gotta do, right? We gotta catch it!"

… Actually, no. I had to run like hell away from her!

I didn't stick around for much longer to watch either one of them come to some sort of agreement or decision. Spinning on my heels, I sprinted as fast as I could away from them, kicking up pieces of dirt and grass under my feet as my legs carried me as quickly as they could.

"It's getting away!" I heard Lyra from behind me. "After it!"

"Wait! Lyra--!" Bon Bon's voice trailed off and was lost in the sounds of the winds the more I distanced myself from them. All I could hear now was the breeze rushing past my beating eardrums, and the trotting of hooves that galloped after me.

It wasn't like before, though. Before I could use my agility and my smarts to get away. But out in this field of grass and riverbanks, all I could do was run. And I knew a human couldn't just outrun a horse so easily, especially one that was so tired and so worn out from everything that had happened today.

My legs began to slow down. My pace lessened. My breaths were becoming heavier and frantic. But all of that soon sank into my subconscious as I heard those gallops become louder. The rhythm of four became a rhythm of eight as both of them began catching up to me. They became heavier. Louder. I could almost feel them breathing down my neck.

Lyra gave out a loud cry. Before I could turn around to see what was going on, or even how far they were behind me, I felt something crashing into the back of me. I stumbled forwards, landing on my front with a heavy thud into the earth. If it wasn't for the long grass, it would probably have felt like crashing onto concrete. It still hurt, though. And it didn't help having a pony on top of me.

"I've got it! I've got it!" chanted Lyra as she lay on my back, pinning me to the ground. I just couldn't move from under her weight. But at least her faintly minty scent was a bit soothing to my otherwise throbbing head.

"H-Hey! Lyra," called out Bon Bon as she came racing up to the two of us, and quickly moving around to the front. "I think you're hurting it!"

"Oh! Yeah, I might have been a bit too rough…"

Not at all. There's nothing rough about having a whole pony get flung at you and getting crushed beneath its weight. Not rough at all.

But at least she finally moved herself off of me.

"You okay there?" she asked. I guess despite her obsession with me like I was a mythological animal, she still had some form of manners. "I didn't mean to hurt you. I just… Oh, wow, you really are a human, right?"

I groaned, trying to roll over to my front without throwing my back out. "Last time I checked, I was," I replied through my heavy breaths. But at least I didn't need to run anymore. Finally, I could relax and lay down.

"Oh gosh, oh gosh, oh gosh--" a high pitch squeal erupted from her grinning lips "--I finally get to talk to a real human!"

"Uh, Lyra?" Bon Bon directed a concerned gaze at her friend with a raised eyebrow. "Don't you think you're taking this a little bit too… Uh… Extreme?"

"Oh, c'mon, Bon Bon; how many ponies could say that they got to talk to a creature from another world?"

So she knew about where I came from? Maybe she really did know how to get me back?

"Well… I guess if you put it like that…" I could hear the uprising excitement in Bon Bon's voice as she spoke.

Lyra stumbled over me, looking down at me with a huge, toothy smile. "Hey! Could ya tell us all about yourself? I'd love to hear all about… Uh, human stuff!"

I couldn't help but chuckle. She really did seem inquisitive about me, and wasn't just asking out of polite conversation. "Sure thing," I agreed, making her smile even more so. I think if she smiled any more, her mouth was gonna split in half. "But, can we talk somewhere where there's more shade?"


I told the both of them of myself as we sat beneath the canopy of a large fruit tree, sheltered in its shade from the baking sun -- or at least to me it was, having been running pretty much all day. I recited everything I has said the many times before; my name, who I was, where I came from, how I came here.

"Wow," exhaled Lyra in amazement of my tale, "so you really do come from another world! So, uh, what're you doing out here?"

Way to put me on the spot straight away, Lyra.

I hesitated to speak, despite their eyes goggling at me in wait of an answer. "I just… thought I'd take a walk by the river, that's all," I finally replied.

"Hmmm… Okay." I gave an inward sigh of relief as Lyra bought my excuse. "You're gonna come back to Ponyville, right? There's so many ponies who I'd think would absolutely love to inspect--" Bon Bon gave her a jab with her elbow "--I mean, would love to meet you. There's Applejack, and Rarity, and Pinkie Pie, and Fluttershy--"

I felt me brain freeze more and more as she began to recite the names of the ponies I had met before.

"--And especially Princess Twilight! I think you two would get along really well, what with you being a social creature and her being the Princess of Friendship!"

Huh. So Twilight governed over a domain? I guess it wasn't that much as a surprise to me, harkening back to when she tried to cuddle me to death.

"Actually, Jamie---Uh, Summers?" Lyra looked at me with inquisitive eyes, but I could hear hesitation in her voice. And I could see embarrassment in her cheeks. "Would it be okay if I could… Um, examine you?"

I felt a lump in my throat. "Um… What do you mean by "examine"?" I asked. I don't think I wanted to know, though.

"Y'know, like… a doctor's examination. Look at your body and stuff."

"Oh! I guess that's okay," I replied. It wasn't the first time I stripped in front of a pony, though that didn't meant I was going to make an exhibitionist of myself.

But before I could even so much as grasp the bottom of my shirt, Lyra already gripped the toes of my shoe with her teeth and pulled it off with one yank. "Huh? Why're you wearing socks in this weather? Do you get cold easily?"

"No, they're just… comfortable to wear." I guess I never really thought of something like that before.

Lyra let out a gentle hum before gripping the tip of my sock, pulling it away as she stared down at my bare foot. "No paw pads," she pointed out. She gently poked at the sole of my foot, causing me to jerk it away a bit, her fine fur tickling it. And then she gave it a gentle nudge with her snout before recoiling back and scrunching her face a little. "Ugh. A bit smelly, too."

"Well I have been running all day," I tried to explain, grinning at her. I found her lack of understanding to be pretty cute.

I felt Bon Bon nuzzle around the back and top of my head, with her sniffing at it every now and then. "Are you sure, Lyra?" she asked. "His hair smells pretty good. Like cranberries."

I didn't know what to think or feel anymore. I felt uncomfortable, even threatened, when ponies tried to hug me, but as these two kept poking and nuzzling and smelling part of my body and stripping me of pieces of clothing, I felt… Well, nothing. Maybe it was because I was like an anomaly to them. Or maybe I just felt good having this kind of attention… Whatever attention that was.

"His body isn't that hairy, either," I heard Bon Bon mutter as she peered over my shoulder and down my shirt.

"But his legs are pretty hairy," replied Lyra as she rolled up one of my trouser legs. "Humans can be so… confusing and weird."

"Gee, thanks," I muttered aloud. I was meant to keep that in my head.

The both of them blushed and giggled, apologizing in unison. But they soon finished, returning to their places while I rolled down my trouser leg and put my sock and shoe back on.

"So, did you have fun examining me?" I teased with a smirk.

"Well, you're a bit weird," jabbed Lyra. Kinda felt like she stuck a pin through my stomach. "But I had fun! Now I get to tell everypony how I got to look at a human up close!"

Bon Bon didn't seem to be as excited. "They probably won't believe us, anyway," she rebutted.

"Sure they will, when we take him back to Ponyville with us."

Just the thought of that happening made me want to be sick. I certainly couldn't go back there now -- not after everything I had done. On top of being hunted by a group of fanatic skittle-coloured ponies, I've broken two windows, buried someone alive in hay, unintentionally flirted with a store clerk, and tied up another with her own tablecloth. I was probably public enemy number one, two, and three at this point.

"U-uh, not at the moment," I interjected. "I still… Y'know. Still need to finish my walk. Yeah…"

Lyra just sighed at me. "Trust us to get one of those humans who are fitness freaks," she grumbled, probably in reference to my mention of running all day. "You'll come by Ponyville on your way back, right?"

"… Sure thing." I guess maybe after everything blows over after a while, it would be okay for me to come back. Though I had the feeling that "a while" was probably in a few years.

Both of them let out a tiny smile. They turned to one another, and then their expression soothed a little. They again looked at me, but with looks of uncertainty. "Hey, um… Summers? Could we, like…"

I think I knew where this was going. "Could you what, Lyra?"

"Could we… Could we give you a hug?"

"You know, so we could tell everypony that we hugged a real life human!" explained Bon Bon.

I didn't reply at first. I glanced over at the two of them, watching as they stared back at me with anticipating, wanting eyes. I know I wasn't one for being hugged or anything like that, but… how could I turn them down and disappoint them? I nodded.

"Sure you can," I replied. I held my arms out in welcome of them. "Now come and give this fitness freak a hug!"

And then did. Pretty hard, too. Both of them pretty much leapt from their seats at me, pinning me against the trunk of the tree with their soft, furry bodies, and wrapping their arms around me like I was a huge teddy bear. And it felt pretty good, too.

After a brief moment, they let go of me and stepped back. "Haha! Now we get to brag about it to everypony!" exclaimed Lyra. Even Bon Bon was now going with the flow of excitement. "You're totally gonna come back later, right?"

"Uh… Sure I will," I replied, though the thought of it was in contrast of the certainty I displayed.

"That's great! We'll see you later then, Jay-Jay!" she cried as the two of them trotted away.

Hah. Jay-Jay. That's something I could probably get used to. Lyra, Bon Bon, and Jay-Jay. It had a pretty cool ring to it.

Oh. And I completely forgot to ask how she knew about me. Damnit...

Chapter 10 - Don't Break A Pinkie Promise

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It felt like I had been sitting on this river bank for a while now, but I hadn't a clue what time it was. I looked up into the sky, but all I really saw was the sun drifting over into the horizon. I guess I'd been sitting here for an hour or so, what with the blue sky shifting into a soft shade of pink and orange. I'd never really thought about how beautiful the horizon looked amongst the scenery of the trees, fields, river, and the looming hills in the distance. It was like I felt right at home.

Although my thoughts were cut a little short when I heard someone call out.

"Hey! Whatchya doin' down there?"

A loud, cheery voice cried out at me, but no matter where I turned to I just couldn't see anything or anyone. I thought maybe my mind was just playing tricks on me. Or maybe it was just a pony in the distance calling after someone else.

"Don't fall into the river, okay?"

Right. Now I was definitely sure that someone was calling out to me. I was the only one here, after all. But I still couldn't see who it was. I looked up at the tree nearby, gazing into its canopy for any movement, having had the thought of them hiding from me.

"No, not there, silly! Above you!"

I looked straight up. And to be honest, I was surprised that I hadn't noticed it sooner from the huge casted shadow upon the fields just beyond me. A rather small hot air balloon drifted overhead, though it was more like a blackened silhouette what with the sun blaring behind it. But it soon began to descend down -- pretty quickly, too -- until the basket touched down a few feet away from me.

"Boy, that was a lot of fun!" The voice called from behind the sides of the basket before rearing up again, having extinguished the flame. A very bright, pastel pink pony turned her gaze to me as she slowly clambered out of the basket -- and clumsily, too -- and finding firm purchase of the grass. She had a very cheery smile on her face, which, in all honesty, was very disconcerting.

And then she started hopping towards me, like one of those Chinese Jiangshi's. Where I once felt disconcerting had now become downright freaked out as heck. I felt my body move back involuntarily as she drew closer and closer, until she got right in my face.

"Uh, hello," I said, trying to sound… You know. Normal.

"Hi!" she cried out. I felt my eardrums pop. "Whatchya doin'?" she asked again with a huge smile from cheek to cheek. If she smiled any harder she would have split her lips.

"Nothing," I responded. "Just, uh… Sitting by the river."

"Ohhhh, you mean, like, in deep thought over something that happened?"

… Did she just read my mind? "Uh, yeah. Something like that," I replied uneasily. Those huge, baby blue eyes of hers were boring into my soul and sucking it dry.

"Huh…" She winced at me, as though she was inspecting me. Probably my soul. "That's not very fun. But I'll join ya anyway."

And so she did, hopping beside me before cannon balling onto the grass, kicking up loose blades and pollen everywhere. I flinched as a bit of grass thudded me on the cheek, but I never took my eyes off of her. Her cheery expression became stern as she sat down on her rump, her forelegs straight and perched on the ground like a cat, gazing out towards the river like I had done earlier. I didn't know if she was just mimicking me without reason, or she really was in thought.

"So what are you thinking about?" I asked. She didn't respond immediately, and instead looked up to the sky, cranking her head back slowly.

"I'm thinking… About what kinda party to throw when you come back to Ponyville."

"Party?" I repeated. "What do you mean by party?"

"As in, a party. Duh!" I gave her a blank stare. "Like a birthday party, or a winter's eve party, or a new friend party!" She turned to me with a rather big grin. "Guess which one you fall into!"

I didn't even know how to respond to that besides with garbled and half-slurred gibberish. Was she suggesting that I was her new friend? Exactly what was going on around here that friendship was the act of saying Hi to a complete stranger? "I… I guess I'm your new friend?" I asked. I felt like I had to, despite knowing the answer.

"Sure are," she exclaimed before turning back to the river before us. "I think it's great to have lots and lots of friends! But do you know what's even better than having friends?" I looked at her, and I shrugged. Though in all honesty, a bacon sandwich would be better at this point. "Making them smile! That's what's better than making new friends. And what better way to make a new friend smile than by throwing them a new friend party?"

I thought about it for a moment. She was right, though. Making your friends smile…

She turned to me with a smile of her own once more. "What are you thinking about?"

I caught myself in silence. What exactly was I thinking about? I couldn't even remember. Perhaps I wasn't thinking about anything, and was instead trying to take everything in. Though her mentioning of Ponyville caused everything that had happened to come rushing back to me. "I was thinking about where I was going to sleep," I replied to her falsely, "where I was gonna get food… How I was gonna get food." And then it dawned on me what she just said. "Hold on -- How did you know I was in Ponyville before?"

"Twilight told me!" At that moment, my heart sank so far into my chest that I could probably defecate it. "She told me you ran away from her new friend cuddle," she continued, constantly glaring at me, "and she was pretty upset about it…" She trailed off as her ears flattened against her head. A frown smeared itself upon her lips. "Don't you like cuddles?"

It was probably the one question that I really had no answer for. No thoughts, or half truths, or even blatant lies. It was something I couldn't really answer. If I said yes, then why was I running from it all? If I said no, then why did I cuddle Trixie, and Lyra and Bon Bon? It wasn't a case of appropriateness either, but… at times I felt my chest physically hurt when I was being cuddled. Other times it didn't.

How could I answer such a simple question if I didn't even have a simple answer -- An answer that I just didn't know?

I sighed, and I shrugged. That was all I could do. Despite my lack of reply, I had hoped that maybe this pink pony could understand. Or at least understand it better than I did.

She looked at me with confusion. I guess she really didn't understand after all. "You don't know why you don't like cuddles?" she concluded. But her demeanour changed rapidly back to that uppity cheerfulness of hers. "Well that's okay. We can just go and ask Twilight and see if she can find anything out."

"I don't think so," I replied sharply, not even missing a beat. "I don't want her hounding me for cuddles again." I stood up and brushed whatever dirt and loose blades of grass were stuck to me. "I can figure it all out on my own."

"Awwwww… Can I join you, then?" She hopped to her hooves and glared at me.

"No, it's okay. I just… I need to be alone to think things over." Her ears dropped again as soon as I declined her. But I patted her on her bouncy pink mane and smiled. "But thanks for the offer… Um…"

She giggled lightly, staring back at me past my hand. "I'm Pinkie Pie," she said. "And you're Summers, right?"

"Twilight told you?" I assumed, lowering my hand to my side.

"Sure did! But you should really come back to Ponyville soon. Twilight really wants to get to know you better and stuff."

Yeah. I bet she does…

Despite my disinterested thoughts, I braved the smile for her a little longer. "Don't worry," I assured her, "I promised the other two I would come back to Ponyville later. And I promised Rarity that I would stay with her… Though I'm not sure if she will want me back after breaking her window."

"Yeah… Rarity is still a teensy bit mad about that," she said, holding her hooves close together in a measuring gesture.

"… How teensy?" I asked. But the gap between her hooves just kept getting wider and wider. "Okay, okay. I get the idea. I'll… Pay for it somehow. I'll try and earn some money when I go back."

She stared at me with a raised eyebrow, almost pushing her face against mine. "Do you Pinkie promise?"

"Um… "Pinkie promise"?"

"Yeah! A Pinkie promise is a really, really, really special promise that friends make to each other that should never be broken!" She turned to me, standing on her hind legs. "Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye," she chanted, complete with all the gestures too. Even sticking her hoof over her eye. At least she wasn't holding an actual cupcake. "Now you do it."

I was a bit sceptical of everything, but it wasn't like it was the weirdest thing I've done all day. A sighed and placed an index finger on my chest, gesturing the start of her little rhyme. "Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a… Cupcake in my eye…"

Pinkie let out a little squeal as she began hopping up and down on the spot. "Yay! Now I definitely, positively, absolutely know that you'll come back to Ponyville! But…" She lunged her head out at me, pressing her snout against my nose. "You never break a Pinkie promise! Never, ever, ever!"

"O-Okay, Pinkie Pie! I won't break it!"

"You promise?"

"I promise!"

"Do you Pinkie promise?"

"… Uh… Yes?"

"… Okay. Pinkie promise."

She just stared at me. Waiting for something. Was she… Was she expecting me to do that stuff all over again? "You mean I gotta do… That thing all over again?"

"Yeah! Duh! That's how you do a Pinkie promise!"

I sighed heavily, and mined the thing again. "Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye," I recited once more, though more drained and unenthusiastic than before.

Pinkie didn't seem to care, or perhaps even notice, as she smiled once more and bounced. "Goody! I'll see you in Ponyville later, then. Don't forget to stop by Sugarcube Corner, okay?"

"Don't worry, Pinkie. I'll stop by and come visit you."

"Do you Pinkie promise?"

Oh God, this is gonna go on all darn day.

"Yes, Pinkie, I do." She stared at me again. I guess I had to do it every time I made a Pinkie promise. "Cross my heart, hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye…"

"Goody! But remember -- that's three Pinkie promises you gotta keep now! And if you break one -- just one--" she loomed closer to me again "-- I'm gonna find you!" And then, in a complete one-eighty, she wrapped her forelegs around me and squeezed me hard. Just being held close to her made me notice her coat smelled faintly of vanilla and strawberry. "So I'll see you tonight, Summers! Bye!"

And so she went, bouncing off through the field like a Pogo stick. It was pretty fun to watch a pony hop away like that, I admit. But it was probably still creepy to watch her bounce towards me.

Though I really need to try and prepare myself for those stealth cuddles that some of them like to randomly do…

Chapter 11 - How To Hug Your Dragon

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Again I found myself wandering without much thought of direction. I wasn't near the river any more, but instead found myself within a flowering meadow some distance from it, with several outcrops of rock and stone of light brown and greys. With every moment I took to examine the scene around me, I kept lingering on the thought that the place looked like some sort of ancient burial ground or settlement from the Stone Age. You know, if Equestria ever had a Stone Age.

But it was such a beautiful place to be. Beds of flowers grouped into different colours from reds, to purple, to blues, to whites, to oranges lay in square-like patches upon the grassy expanse, guarded by rocks both large and small that ranged from half a foot to several feet high, with some of them towering over me.

This was what I needed right now. This was where I needed to be to relax and to calm my mind. Something as lustrous, quiet, and peaceful as this place. I sat in front of the flat surface of one of the smaller boulders, laying back against its hard yet cool surface before reclining my head against it. The cool touch of the surface did wonders for my pounding head, and I gave a sigh of relief.

Why do I hate it, I thought to myself. No… Why do I fear them…?

But before I could even get to begin contemplating the question, I began hearing loud clinking noises from behind me. Every one of those high-itched strikes stabbed into my eardrums like nails on a chalkboard. I swivelled my body around the rock, trying to get a view of whatever was making that noise. I couldn't see any movement though. All I heard was the slow clinks of metal on stone coming from somewhere nearby.

Then I saw several small chunks crack and crumble away from one of the bigger boulders nearby. Several more flew from behind it, away and to the side. Seemed like someone was doing a bit of mining.

Well I certainly wasn't gonna get much needed rest and relaxation with those piercing thuds rupturing my ears and brain. I grunted and stood to my feet, looking over the rock which I laid against, watching more chippings of stone fly from behind the larger boulder as I made my way over. Slowly, obviously; I didn't want to risk startling a pickaxe-wielding psychopath.

As I drew closer towards the boulder, I could hear small panting breaths and little grunting noises. Kinda high pitched, too. Like a child. Did… Did these ponies employ child labour or something? I didn't really want to believe my own thoughts, let alone have them in the first place, but I wanted to be wrong. So, so wrong.

But I wasn't, in a way. I kept some distance from the boulder as I strafed around it slowly, only letting the sounds of the rustling grass beneath my feet be my only known presence. But what I saw was, what I thought, more unbelievable than it should have been. A tiny, little purple dragon with green frills and crest was struggling as it swung a large pickaxe bigger than himself. His stumpy arms were shaking as it hoisted the tool over its head, jittering as the head of the axe collided with the rock's surface. It didn't seem to notice me though.

But I couldn't help but feel terrible for the poor creature. Who would make such a tiny creature do such hard labour that it was clearly struggling to do? I kept suspecting that the ponies were making him do this -- How else would Rarity get all of those gems and jewels? But then I thought about other dragons being the cause of it, like some sort of social hierarchy.

"You okay there?" I spoke up, watching as the dragon swept a tiny hand across his brow. "You need a hand with… whatever it is you're doing?"

"I'm… I'm fine," he spoke up with a young, childlike innocence and stubbornness. "I'm kinda used to this stuff." He didn't even bother to turn towards me, and instead gave the boulder another sudden strike with the pickaxe. A tiny piece of rock bopped him on the forehead as the axe struck hard, piercing and cracking the face of it.

But even his legs were starting to quiver now. "You need to take a break," I suggested. Well, it was more like I told him. "I'm sure that whatever it is you're doing isn't worth straining yourself for."

"I said I'm fine!" he snapped back at me with a scowl. "And besides, someone's gotta do it. Unless you--" His little head and big eyes soon shifted and turned to me. And as he did, a veil of white washed over his body, it seemed. His eyes slowly gazed from my legs, to my body, then to mine. A sudden cry blasted from his lungs as he hobbled back and flung the pickaxe into the air. Almost at the same time, the axe and his rear both collided with the ground as he tripped over one of the money stone fragments. "W-who are you? W… What are you…?"

"Hey there, take it easy!" I exclaimed with an assuring smile as I raised my hands in gesture of innocence. Or at least I tried to, but the little guy just wasn't accepting it; his hands were still jittering, though I couldn't tell if that was from fright or from his arms being overworked. Perhaps my height gave off an intimidating vibe? I decided to lower myself to my knees, kneeling down upon the grass to try and put myself at his level, but he still only came to my chest. "I'm Summers. What's your name?" I asked.

"O-oh, me? I'm Spike…"

"That's a pretty tough-sounding name, Spike," I flattered. If he's like any other little boy, then gentle praise like this would get me somewhere. "I bet you're a pretty popular guy with the lady dragons, huh?"

"Ah… Hehe, well, if I knew any, then I probably would be…" he paused for a moment, and I couldn't help but raise an eyebrow. "But I guess I'm pretty well known with a lot of ponies, so that makes up for it, right?"

"Ponies? Spike, do you come from Ponyville?"

"Yeah. I live with Twi---Uh, the Princess of Friendship." His lips curled to a sheepish grin. "Heh. Gotta get used to calling her that…"

"You mean you stay with Twilight Sparkle, right?"

"Oh, so you've met Twilight? Was she… Uh, was she being a bit… grumpy when you went to see her?"

My body froze as soon as he asked. "Uh, no! No, uh… She didn't seem grumpy," I replied. A bold-faced lie if there ever was one. "Has she been grumpy all day?"

"More grumpy than an ursa major having its sleep disturbed." I had no idea what one of those was, but it seemed pretty bad. "She kept going on about how she got denied her first ever new friend cuddle or something. I think she's taking Pinkie Pie's lessons a bit too seriously."

"Yeah, about that…" I was in two minds about it. should I just keep it to myself, or should I tell Spike about what happened? If he's staying with Twilight, then surely he could try and soften the blow for me. "Actually, I was the one who got her all grumpy and stuff."

"… Wait. What?"

"I'm not from here, Spike. I found myself here randomly, and Twilight was the first one to take me in. I told her about myself and what had happened, and, out of nowhere, she tried to cuddle me. I panicked and ran."

And how did Spike reply to that? By trying to stifle his hysteria with both of his tiny hands trying to cover that big mouth of his. It was all for naught, however, as he burst into a fit of laughter, toppling backwards on the grass and kicking his feet as he held his chest tight. "Y-you mean Twilight was trying to cuddle you?" he spoke through gasping breaths. "And---and you t-tried to run away from her?"

"… That's right."

All my confirmation did was make the snotty runt cry louder in laughter as he rolled onto his front. A teary bead dripped down his plush cheek as he shut his eyes tight. "I-I can't believe I missed all that! That would---would have been soooo hilarious to watch!"

I furrowed my brow as I sighed, rubbing my forehead with a finger and thumb. "You done yet, Spike? You're giving me a headache…"

His outburst was starting to lessen at least, but the little whelp was still giggling despite his attempt to hold them in. "I-I'm sorry, Summers… It's just that---Heh---I've never thought Twilight could be that… uh…"

"Crazy."

"Diligent, I was gonna say." His gave a cheeky grin. "But I guess crazy would be a fitting word, too. Not that I could blame ya, though; I think I would have ran away scared too if she was chasing me for a cuddle."

"Hey! I wasn't scared of her!"

"I bet you were."

"Well I wasn't."

"You said you panicked, right?"

"… Right."

"You only panic if you get scared. And you ran, too. So you were super scared."

"… You know, for a baby dragon, you sure are a huge smart aleck."

"I get that from Twilight."

I shook my head and sighed heavily. But as I did, my eyes caught sight of the pickaxe laying just between the two of us. I hadn't really noticed it before, what with it being sunk in the long grass, but now I just couldn't take my attention from it. "Did Twilight ask you to do this, too?" I asked quietly. I didn't want to believe she would make Spike do something like this.

"No." I gave an inward sigh of relief. "Rarity asked me to." And then I gave an inward grumble. "Whenever Rarity needs gems for her outfits and stuff, she asks me to find some."

"You can do that?"

Spike tapped the tip of his nose with a tiny finger. "I can sniff out all kinds of gems. And so far--" he turned to the scattering of stones "--this is the best place. But I totally wanna get into this big one right here."

"You can smell lots of gems in this one?"

"Sure can! Smells like one really big chromatic geode. And the more gems there are, the more I get to keep for myself!"

"… Um… Explain?"

Spike grunted and rolled his eyes. "A chromatic geode? You know, a geode that houses loads of different kinda of gems?"

"Oh. Right. I know what you mean now." I didn't.

"And I don't think I need to explain that dragons eat gems."

"… They do?"

"Man, you really are clueless, aren't ya?" Way to rub salt in the wound, you little… sugar lump. But I guess that kinda made sense as to why dragons hoard gems as well as precious metals to sleep on. "Anyways, my usual pickaxe couldn't get through it, so I had to grab something a little bit bigger. But, uh… It's kinda too big…"

I looked back down at the pickaxe, and reached out and grasped the handle with one hand, standing it up by its head before getting back to my feet. "Let me take care of this," I said, swinging the tool over my shoulder. "I'll get them for ya."

"Y-you will?" Spikes big eyes grew even bigger as he stared up at me. Such a cute little squirt he was.

"Sure thing. Can't let kids like you go around wielding axes two sizes too big for them, right?" I stood in front of the huge rock, feet apart and knees bent as I hefted the pickaxe in front of me.

"I can take care of myself, thanks," snapped Spike, though without much of an edge on his tongue. "But… that axe is pretty heavy…"

"S'all good, Spike. Just stand back."

I took a single step forward as my arms swung outward, then behind me, until finally arcing widely over my head as the sharp tip of the axe's head struck violently upon the surface of the geode. I sharp clank rang through the air, followed by several shards and shrapnel of stone. As I took the head from the rock, I saw a fairly large puncture in the surface. "This could take some time," I muttered under my breath as I readied the next swing.

With every strike I imposed upon the geode, the bigger Spike's eyes grew as he gazed upon my efforts. I couldn't tell if it was because of seeing a large human wield such a tool without effort, kinda like watching a knight swing his sword, or if it was because with every inch the pick dug further into the geode, the closer he was to having his lustrous bounty.

And yet it didn't matter one way or another. What mattered was that I could help out. That in of itself was a duty, an accomplishment, and my reward. Anything else was a bonus.

"You're pretty good with that," said Spike, still watching as I swung the pickaxe. "You done this kinda thing before?"

"A long time ago, admittedly," I replied with short breath as I hoisted the pickaxe, speaking between strikes. "A few years ago I worked… Worked as a labourer when we were rebuilding the city hospital… So I did some lifting, digging, carrying things places… General handyman around the place… Good money, too…"

"So you go round helping people make houses and stuff?"

"More like I help clean up after other people's work... But it's not exactly a hard job, and the pay is good... Keeps me occupied, too…"

A sudden high, clinking noise caused the two of us to pause. I hadn't even paid much attention to the mining as much as I was talking to Spike, failing to notice that the small puncture I had made had become a fairly big hole. The tip of the axe slid from the edges of the opening with a *shink*, and the light cast through it refracted into a multitude of soft, clear colours. Blue, purple, green, yellow -- so many colours shone from the geode through the many crystal formation from within.

"Y-you did it!" cried Spike as he jumped in the air before racing towards it. "Rarity will be so happy that we managed to get this many gems!"

"We still need to get them out, though," I replied, looking at the hole and comparing it to the size of the whole rock.

"Only a little bit bigger, though," Spike said. The little dragon hopped up slightly, grabbing the edge of the hole with both claws before pulling himself up. Quickly his hands began to claw and burrow at the edges, chipping pieces away and making the hole wider and wider. "If I can get it wide enough, then I can just crawl inside and get the gems out that way."

And certainly he did just that. Despite his diminutive size, his strength was great enough to tear off chunks of the rock like he was taking apart a Lego set. Within moments he squirmed inside, taking his time with prying out the gems from the geode's inner crust. Every so often Spike would drop a handful of gems onto the grass below, and it was only then that I could truly marvel at the beauty of these gemstones. I picked one of them up, a small chunk of topaz, and twirled it around between a finger and thumb. Hard, cool, and slightly rough.

"Hey! You better not take any of that yet!" shouted Spike, his voice carrying much more fierce and louder as it echoed in the gem-filled chamber.

"I'm just taking a look," I replied calmly. But before I could get much of a closer look, a purple clawed hand snatched it from my fingers.

"I'll take that," A smug-looking Spike said. But I found myself speechless as I stood next to a waist-high pile of multicoloured gems. Did Spike really dig all that out as quickly as he did? He must be pretty good at this. "So we have rubies… sapphires, emeralds… topaz'… amethysts… Oh, and a few diamonds."

"Quite a load, huh?" I couldn't help but smile at the pile of treasure the both of us had worked to get. "So how are we gonna get all of this stuff out of here?"

"I brought a sack. Duh. It's somewhere around here…"

"Hm. Okay. Have fun with that, Spike." But before I could turn to leave, the little guy tugged on my trousers.

"W-wait---You're leaving already? Ain't ya gonna some back with me to Rarity and show her how much we got for her?"

I paused for a moment. And then I just smiled. "What do you mean "we"? It was you who did all of this -- digging and all, right?"

His cute lil eyes couldn't be any more cuter. I swear I could see him tear up a little, too. "But… Summers… I can't take all the credit for this! And you deserve something for helping me."

"Hmmm… Well, there is something you can do for me, Spike."

"What's that?"

"Just don't tell anyone I helped you. No doubt Twilight and Rarity are still after me. If I'm to remain free of their… grumpy cuddling techniques, then they must never know what was done here today."

The little dragon stifled a chuckle, no doubt thinking about the both of them cuddling me to death. "Well… Okay, Summers. But if you come back to Ponyville, you'll come visit us, right?"

"If Twilight has calmed down, then I'll do just that."

I expected some sort of witty remark from the little guy… but he just ran up to me and wrapped his tiny little arms around my leg and held his body close. "I'll see you in a few years then."

There it was. But I just knelt down and hugged him close, petting his head lightly. "I think she'll be okay by tomorrow, Spike."

"Hah. You don't know Twilight at all, do you?"

Chapter 12 - The Apple Doesn't Fall Far..., Part 1

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As much as I wanted to give the little sugar lump a hand with his haul, I couldn't risk being spotted. Not at the moment, anyway. But I did give him a hand shovelling all those gems into one hell of a burlap sack. By the end of it, the thing was nearly twice the size of Spike. Even watching him drag it away was painful to watch.

But we had to split paths for the time being. As he made his way back to Ponyville, I carried on in the opposite direction, following a curving path of tightly packed dirt and soil, littered with handfuls---or rather, hooffuls---of cobblestones. The path seemed awfully familiar, and yet my mind couldn't bring it to surface.

I didn't let it get the better of me, though. The whole change of pace of my hiking---from running like a headless chicken to walking a casual pace---brought with it more relaxation than I had felt in some time. I was away from Ponyville, distanced from crazy ponies, and I met a real dragon. God, I love dragons!

But as the moments became minutes, the cobblestones were becoming more dense in their amount. Where they had once only been light scatterings, they now became almost invasive, gradually becoming more of a presence until, finally, there was no dirt to show. Then I found myself once more caught flanked by looming trees on either side of the pathway. I was fairly sure that this path was taking me back to Ponyville.

I guess I wasn't too bothered about it. The pathway wasn't one that I had known, so maybe it would take me to someplace else that I'd not been to. Preferably one that's deserted.

Until I saw the barn house in the distance, dipped past the hills.

"Oh, God, no," I muttered to myself under my breath, shaking my head. "But I guess now would be a good time to say sorry to Applejack." The thought wasn't exactly a pleasant one, considering I'd probably end up getting bucked in the chest as a welcome.

The trek wasn't particularly long, and the downward slopes helped with picking up a faster pace without the added effort. But the measure of distance wasn't nearly as enveloping as the scenery was from a top of the hills. In the backdrop I could see the setting sun shine upon a huge orchard or apple trees. It was like a scene out of Lord of the Rings or something. A truly marvellous sight to behold.

And then I heard several steps from over the hill.

"Ah'll tell you what, Big Mac," I heard a familiar voice in the distance, "If I ever see that varmint again, I'll do---I'll do somethin' terrible to him! Ya can give us a hoof, too."

"Eeyup."

… Or maybe now wasn't such a good time to apologize as I had thought.

I panicked, scurrying on my feet like a rat lost in a maze. I backtracked the best I could, trying to find a decent enough sized tree to hide behind, but they were all so thin and loosely packed that you couldn't even hide a Halfling, let alone a human.

And then I saw something down the right side, just off several tens of meters from me---something that I hadn't even noticed before; a rather large tree house sat upon the thick branches of a large apple tree.

I didn't have much choice. I could either run back, probably be spotted on the way back up the hills, and get killed; go and meet Applejack and say sorry, and get killed in response; or I can run down the hill and hide in the tree house, but probably kill myself while running down the steep decline.

Well, if I was gonna get killed, then it'd might as well be in style. And something that will probably be uploaded to YouTube by tomorrow.

I turned and dashed down the hill, trying to keep my footing as the decline hastened more and more, until I ended up tripping on a loose mound of dirt and sent myself launching forwards. Face-planting the grass, all I could do for the next twenty or so meters was to let out pained yelps as I felt my body roll faster and faster down the hill like an old tyre.

It didn't take too long till my body stopped, collapsed in a curled up heap on flat ground just some meters from the bottom of the hill. Though it was pretty irritating having my freshly washed clothes get dirty so quickly, my distress was severed from my mind by the sight of a large tree house sat upon thick branches of an old apple tree.

I pushed myself to my feet the best I could, having felt a stabbing pain rush right up my right leg despite having no visible injury. I staggered towards it, slowly making my way to the stepped ramp. It was quite an impressive structure, too; looked like a small cottage than a mangy excuse for carpentry work like most others.

But as I planted my foot on the ramp, another jolt of pain shot up my leg. I winced, gritting my teeth as I took the climb slowly. It was a hassle trying to push off only the left leg, having to take the time to make sure I didn't lose my footing on the right, but I'd eventually make it.

And when I did, I wish I hadn't.

"H-hey! What're you doin'…?" a tiny voice spoke out. Strong accent, too. Just like Applejack's, actually. Then it hit me as to who she was. I was truly screwed.

"Hi there," I spoke up as I moved under the doorway slowly. "Please, whatever you do, don't scream. Okay?"

"Applejack! Sis!"

The bloody pony screamed at the top of her lungs as she tried to run past me. At first I flinched at her ridiculously loud voice, but before she could move past me I wrapped my arms around her belly, pulling her off the floor before retreating back into the tree house, huddling as far back as I could.

"Help! Applejack! There's a monster tryin' ta---"

I clamped her mouth shut with a hand, but she was still yelling muffled words from behind my palm, squirming and wriggling and kicking as I help her tight and close to my body.

"Listen to me," I muttered in her ear, "I'm not here to hurt you. I'm not gonna hurt you. I just need a place to hide for a while." The more I spoke, the more I realized how much of a crazed axe murderer I sounded like. "But I need you to keep quiet and---"

"You up there, sugar cube?" Great. Now Applejack's found us. "You okay in there? I heard ya screaming!"

I looked down at her, and she back at me. "I'm gonna take my hand away. But please, don't scream or tell her I'm up here. I really need you to do this for me…"

I didn’t wait for her to agree or deny. Slowly I took my hand from her mouth and placed it down at my side.

"Uh… No, it's okay, Applejack!" she cried out. "Ah thought ah, uh, ran out of glue! But ah found some! Heh…"

"Oh. Okay, Apple Bloom. If ya need any, then you can find some in the barn. My an' Big Mac are gonna mosey on into Ponyville for a while. We'll be back soon, okay?"

"'Kay, sis! See ya soon!" I heard their hoofsteps drift further away, but I still couldn't help but hold my breath for longer. For a moment, I had completely forgotten I had even stopped breathing until Apple Bloom's struggling forced me to take a lungful of air. "Could ya please let go of me now?" she whimpered.

"Oh. Yeah. I'm sorry." I quickly loosened my grip from her, letting her jump off my lap. "Thanks a bunch for not grassing me in, by the way."

But Apple Bloom kept glaring at me with a mix of suspicion, confusion, and caution. "Did you do something bad to Applejack?" she asked. "Why're ya hidin' from her?"

"I… Uh, it's a long story."

"Was it you who knocked over those haystacks earlier?"

"… Um… Yeah, it was…"

"And you're also the one who told Applejack she couldn't have a cuddle?"

"That depends."

"On wha?"

"Are you gonna hit me if I say 'yes'?"

"No! I ain't gonna hit ya!"

"Okay. It was me." She lied. She punched me in the stomach. Or you know, whatever it's called when a pony jabs you with her foreleg really hard. "Ow! You said you weren't gonna hit me!"

"Jus' cuz my sis is the Element of Honesty doesn't mean I am." Her sharp words were only matched with a second punch to my stomach. "And that's for foal-napping me!"

"Hey! I said I was sorry!" I groaned as I tried to rub the pain away. "Would ya please stop hitting me already?"

"Ah'm done."

Note to self: Apple Bloom is a big fat liar who hits people.

"So… Who are ya, anyway?" As much as I enjoyed having to go through my life story over and over again with every pony that asked me who I was, I decided to give the filly the abridged version. She was still pretty astounded by the tale, regardless of its shortened version. "So, uh, you come from a different world to ours? That sounds really weird."

"Not as weird as me talking to ponies, I can assure you that much," I jested with a chuckle.

"So ponies don't talk in your world? Then who do ya talk to?"

"… Other humans."

"Then how do the ponies talk to other ponies?"

It was fairly evident that Apple Bloom couldn't wrap her head around the concept. I guess probably in the same way some humans can't wrap their head around how they evolved from apes. "In our world, ponies are on equal intellect to… pigeons."

"… Pigeons."

"Right."

I think I saw one of the cogs in her brain dislodge and roll out her ear.

"If I go to your world, will I turn pigeon-brained?"

"I've no idea. Would be pretty funny to see though."

"No it wouldn't!"

I didn't bother to continue the teasing, mainly out of fear of getting a third punch in the abs. "By the way, Apple Bloom," I said, "what are you doing up here on your own? This your own little club house?"

"This is the Cutie Mark Crusaders clubhouse," she spoke up energetically, clearly prideful in the place, "and Ah'm workin' on a new banner to hang up outside." She galloped to the doorway and stood on her hind legs, gripping a length of string that hung from the ceiling with her teeth and yanking it down, revealing a hidden staircase. For a moment, she disappeared up the steps before coming back down with a rolled up length of thick paper in her mouth. As she came back, she whipped her head upwards, unravelling the long banner in front of me. "This is what Ah've got so far…"

I didn't know what I expected from a child. The paper was rough and off colour kind of like recycled paper, with 'Cutie Mark Crusader Clubhouse' hastily scrawled in multi-coloured lettering that alternated red, blue, then yellow repeatedly—the yellow was especially hard to see on the paper. There were little swirls and stars in the corners too, along with striped borders around the edges. It was kinda cute, but it was pretty bland and basic.

And I felt pretty bad for thinking bad of it. Was kinda hard being a graphic designer and to not be so critical of it.

"So," she blurted out as she looked up at me, "what d'ya think?"

My lips forcibly curled at the ends to an awkward smile. "It's… pretty cool, Apple Bloom," I half-heartedly applauded. "I like what you did with the swirls… And the stars… And the border looks good too…"

Her ears flattened against her head as she turned back to look at it. "It ain't that great, is it…?" Her voice was bass and gravelly.

And it made my heart sink into the pit of my stomach.

"Hey, it's not all terrible," I tried to cheer, but it felt more like an insult than anything else. I kneeled down next to her, resting a hand on her withers and petting her. I felt her body lean slightly towards me. "I mean, we just need to change a few things—we can change the paper, and use some better paint that isn't so thick, and we can put some glitter and stickers too!"

She turned back to me with a glint in her eye. "You… You're gonna help me…?"

"Of course I am! We can totally make this banner look awesome together—you and me. We'll make the best banner ever."

"Ya darn right we will!" I'd not seen her this excited, this happy, before now. It made me feel good. Made me feel great about myself. I felt like I was really helping out.


"Hey, Jay-Jay—can ya help me out with my costume? I can't get the shoulders to sit properly."

"Hold still, would you? I can't fasten the straps with you squirming around like that! I don't care if you're ticklish; just sit still for a moment!"

"That looks about right. Thanks so much, Jay! You're a real good friend, y'know that?"


"…lo?… Hello?"

I didn't know what happened. For a moment I felt like I blacked out; like I was thrown out of my body and thrown back in time. I don't know why that memory popped into my head, but it wasn't something I wanted. Not something I needed.

Why did I think of her?

"Hey! Anyone home in there?"

I didn't even realise Apple Bloom was still talking. "Huh? Sorry, Apple Bloom—I just kinda spaced out there…"

"You feelin' okay? Do ya need to go to the hospital?"

"I'm fine, I'm fine."

"Okay… Anyways, I said I'ma go over to Rarity's and see if she's got any glitter 'n' other stuffs. I'll be back soon." She made her way to the doorway, but stopped just at the frame. "By the way—what's yer name?"

"Summers."

"Okey-dokey! I'll be back in a lil while, Summers!"

And just like that, she shot out the door and ran as fast as those tiny lil legs could carry her. I glanced out the window, watching as she sped off into the distance with a smile on my face. She's a real cute kid.

Then it hit me. She was going to Rarity

"Oh God! What if she tells her I'm here!?"

Chapter 13 - The Apple Doesn't Fall Far..., Part 2

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For a rather simple tree house it sure had one heck of an attic. It felt almost the same size as a whole house, and yet it was actually only a third in size. Some sort of Time Lord technology stuff going on here—bigger on the inside.

I found myself rummaging through opened boxes and large wicker baskets, though only because it all piqued my interest. There were a mix of different toys and tools and other assortment of DIY stuff, from paint brushes to bouncy balls to strips of lumber. I suppose some of this stuff was left over from when the tree house was built, but the toys seemed out f place. I found myself fiddling around with a half-finished scooter kit, with the wheels and handle bars disconnected. Seemed like there were a few screws missing, too.

Not that I'm shocked. A few other pieces were missing besides screws, either lost or probably just didn't come with any to begin with. They probably picked this up from IKEA or something.

Before I could consider fixing this up to pass the time, I heard quick, tiny hoofsteps from the ramp outside.

"Summers! We need ta talk!" Apple Bloom's voice almost echoed, and also sounded urgent… And a little demanding. I had this gut feeling that she was gonna hit me again.

I put the halves of the scooter down and shuffled to the hatch way of the staircase. "You call, Apple Bloom?" I called down to her.

"Wha' did ya go to—Wait. Why are ya up there?"

"Hiding."

"From Applejack?"

"From everyone. Hey, you didn't tell Rarity where I was, right?"

"No, and even if did I wouldn't had been able to. That's what we need to talk about."

She sounded pretty serious. I swung my legs around and onto the steps before making my way back down—a tough chore considering the small size of the hole and with how tall I was. "Sounds pretty bad. So what happened at—" I let out a gasp as Apple Bloom jabbed me in the ribs with a hoof "—Ow! What the heck did I do this time?"

"Why'd ya break Rarity's window?"

The question came completely out of nowhere, and I paused before I spoke, "She trapped me inside her house and wouldn't let me out!"

"Trapped you? You didn't break in to her house?"

"Break in? I was trying to break out!"

"She locked the door an' everythin'?"

"Yeah. I had to dive through the window just to get out."

"… 'Kay. She's awfully upset with ya, Summers. But Applejack said she was gonna help fix her window after their meetin'." As soon as she said "meetin'", her face dropped and her eyes shifted from me to the floor. "Actually… that's what I need ta talk to ya 'bout."

"Meeting?" I felt the tightness of my throat as I tried to swallow. "What kind of meeting?"

"… About you."

"Me? What about me?"

"I dunno. They wouldn't let me join 'em. But everypony seems awfully mad at ya, Summers."

I felt my heart skip a beat. Then another. It was like my heart had stopped, and every ounce of blood that was in my veins rushed straight to my head. My brain felt numb, and my hands were shaky. Then my legs followed suit. I stumbled, collapsing against the opposite wall before resting my back against it, with my legs sprawled out haphazardly in front of me.

"S-Summers? Are ya feelin' okay?"

I felt my breaths become shorter with each inhale. "How… How did things come to this…?" I held my head in my hands. I was burning, like I caught a fever. My eyes were shaking in their sockets, and I couldn't focus on anything. "All I did was refuse to cuddle some ponies… And now they're talking about what they're gonna do to me!"

"I doubt it's that bad, Summers. Maybe they'll just—"

"They're gonna form an angry mob and chase me! They're gonna start a man hunt for me! They'll—they're gonna capture me, and then they'll throw me in the dungeon next to some fat hairy bull guy who's gonna make me his—"

I felt a sudden flash of pain on my left cheek. I think Apple Bloom hit me again. Everything went back to normal, like her hoof was the cure for my breakdown.

"Snap outta it, Summers, ya eejit! I know all of 'em, and they ain't gonna hurt ya! Well, I guess Rarity might for breaking her window."

"I broke Twilight's window, too."

"… Okay, Twilight might do too." She paused, as though she was waiting for me to say something. But my mind was just an utter blank at this point. I had so many thoughts that nothing was getting processed, like my brain had crashed. "By the way, Summers—why didn't ya give 'em any cuddles?"

An age old question, practically. Yet it was something I didn't know, nor was it something I could explain. It was like asking why the sky is blue, why the grass is green, and what the meaning of life is. It wasn't something I could say for certainty.

"I don't know, Apple Bloom. Truly I don't. All day I've been thinking about it, but I still haven't come to any sort of conclusion. It could take a while."

"Well, ya might wanna get a move on; the sun's startin' ta set."

I turned to look over my shoulder and out the window that was beside me. She was right; the sun was dipping into the horizon, half way between sky and earth. "What time is it, Apple Bloom?"

"Nearly six."

"You think we can get your banner done by seven?"

"Sounds like a plan!"


I was quite impressed with what the both of us had accomplished, especially with the amount of arguing we had between sky blue and baby pink banner paper. Apple Bloom won, of course; she had a good way of persuading me with a balled up hoof ready to sock me one.

Baby pink paper lay sprawled across the floor in front of us, reaching probably five feet in length and a foot in width, to which I couldn't help but wonder how she was gonna put this up on her own. I still got to add my touch though, by putting strips of shiny blue ribbon around the edges to make a border. Just inside, Apple Bloom put scattering of golden stars in the corners, which really did look nice against the pink background.

Along the banner she wrote "Cutie Mark Crusader Clubhouse"—which she nearly misspelt "clubhowse" if it hadn't been for my intervention. It took a while to really agree on how to write it; she wanted to have it in multiple colours like the old one, but the bright colours just blended into the pink. In the end, we came up with a great idea to make the writing in blue paint, and then go around the edges of each letter with trails of glitter. It would look good out in the sun, if not for the fact that the sun was going down.

"I think it came out really well," I said, yawning ever so slightly as I spoke. "But I think I'm gonna have to give you a hand putting it up. It's pretty huge."

The tired filly let out a yawn of her own before rubbing her half-closed eyes with a hoof, getting a bit of glitter stuck to her face in the process. "Ya gonna help me put it up tomorrow, right?"

"Sure I will."

And a feeling of ambivalence washed over me. I didn't want to say it, and yet I couldn't say anything to the contrary—a hard thing to say considering I was a wanted man, effectively. I had to watch my step and watch my back, like I was Solid Snake. And yet I couldn't just say "no" to her, not to that cute, bug-eyed face of her. I think it was the huge bow that made her look so darn adorable.

Apple Bloom giggled as she kept her eyes fixated on the banner. "I sure hope Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle are gonna like this."

"They will. You put a lot of effort into making this banner, you know."

It was like déjà vu as she turned to look at me with that recognisable look of confusion in her eyes. "Uh… Don'tchya mean "we"?"

I hummed as I smiled at her. "Who? Me? Can't be. I've never been here before. You haven't seen me. You don't know who I am. You spent all day in here, and you worked tirelessly on this awesome banner that you made all by yourself." She looked down at the banner, gazing at all the work we had put into it. Then she gazed back up to me with saddened eyes. She understood what I was saying. "Isn't that right, Apple Bloom?"

Her mouth opened, her lips moved, but not a single word came out for that brief moment. "B-but, Summers," she forced, "I can't say I did all o' this. You helped out too, and you helped make it better." She rushed over to the back of the room and snatched a rolled of piece of paper—the old banner—in her teeth before tossing it towards me, letting it unravel in front of me. "Look at how much better you helped make my old one! How… How can ya sit back an' let me take all the credit?"

"Because I'm only human." To anyone else it would have made sense—would have meant something. But saying it to a pony only drew from her a blank look. "It doesn't matter. But what matters is that you put more effort into this than I did. You spent all day working on getting a nice banner for your clubhouse. That's a lot of dedication, you know. And that makes you" —I pressed my finger on one of the golden star sequins that lay on the floor, letting it stick to the tip before putting it on Apple Bloom's cheek— "a real special star."

I didn't mean to do it, but a single little bead of tear ran down her flustered cheek. I moved me finger to stop it, wiping it away from her face before gently petting her soft, cherry-coloured mane. "I still feel bad 'bout it though," she muttered quietly.

"Please don't worry about it, Apple Bloom," I pleaded with her. I stood up and took my hand from her head. "I need to go. Applejack might be back soon, and I ain't gonna be able to hide in here forever. You go get some sleep, hon."

The poor filly sniffled as her shimmering eyes followed me as I stood. "You promise ya gonna come back tomorrow?"

"I promise." Despite my word, she looked away from me with a doubtful look in her eyes. "You don't believe me?"

"It's… It's not that…" She paused, shifting her hooves around before her gaze shifted back to me. "Summers… Can I have a cuddle?"

It was like a mix of when I cuddled Trixie and when I cuddled Lyra and Bon Bon. I had no objection, no sense of vulnerability, and no sense of discomfort. No, it was something different. Something more. Like I wanted to hold them close, like I was doing something good for them—giving me soul to them.

"Of course, Apple Bloom," I cooed to her as I knelt down to one knee. One hand wrapped around her withers while the other around the back of her head, and gently I pulled her close. Her forelegs lifted up and over my shoulders as she buried her warm cheek into my chest and nuzzled under my chin like an orphaned kitten. I could still feel her tear-dampened coat as she nuzzled me, and I couldn't help but stroke down her back and head. "Try and get a good night sleep, okay, hon?"

"I'll try, Summers. You're a real good friend…"


" a real good friend, y'know that?"


I could hear her voice again. A voice I thought I could forget about, but I just couldn't let it go. And just like that, I found myself with a dull, numbing pain in my chest—in my heart.

I let go of Apple Bloom and stood up once more, letting her forelegs just slip back from over my shoulders and onto the ground. "Good night, Apple Bloom," was all I said before I took my leave. I didn't wave, and I didn't smile. Heck, I didn't even realise how monotonous my goodbye sounded then.

I just made my way back down the ramp, still clinging onto the words that Apple Bloom had said but moments earlier. "A good friend," was all I could mutter myself one. Then twice. To anyone else, they had meaning. To me, they were just words.

But it wasn't until I heard tapping at the window that I rethought about that. I turned and saw Apple Bloom by the window, holding the top end corner of the banner. Her hoof was pointing at something near the end of the glittering text—a gold-coloured sun just above and to the side of the last 'E'. It took me a moment, but I understood it. A nice golden sun for Summers.

I gave a big smile and waved back at her before I made my way back up the hill. And it was then that I remember what having a great friend really meant.

Chapter 14 - I'm With You

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I wasn't sure how long I had been walking for, but it was definitely taking its toll on my lower extremities. I felt cramping pains run through my right foot to the point that it was painful just bending it or putting any sort of pressure on it. My thighs couldn't stop shaking from the amount of stress that they've had to endure all day.

And then my legs gave out completely. I collapsed, falling forward like a tree after it's been hacked away by a lumberjack, only stopping myself from face-planting the grass as my arms shot out to break the fall. I felt like the only energy I had left was in my arms and hands, and so I crawled my way to a nearby tree and laid back against it.

I never realized where I was until now. I sat on top of a hill that overlooked Ponyville, with almost the entirety of it under my gaze, and it looked… incredible. To one side behind me I could see the whole of Applejack's farm—even Apple Bloom's little tree house. But in front of me I saw the entirety of Ponyville, its expanse rolled out in front of me. So many houses, so many structures; it was all overwhelming.

I couldn't help but smile as I spotted some of the places I had been to, and how different they all looked between night and day. I glanced into the distance to where Rarity's boutique was, but there didn't seem to be anything. No lights, no noise, not even from her house. I guess she went to bed early? Maybe it's just the normal bed time for ponies here.

But then I heard loud cheering only some distance away towards the middle of the village. Quickly my eyes took to the sight of bright yellow sparkles littering the area like… well, sparklers.

Then I realised what day it was; Bonfire Night. I had completely forgotten.

I couldn't make out the noise that followed, but it sounded like a loud voice. But the more I tried to listen in to it, the more I began to understand what it was; some sort of announcement over a microphone.

So ponies celebrated Bonfire Night too? We had a lot more in common than I thought.

I sighed, flinging myself back against the tree and hitting my head against the bark. "Can't believe I'm gonna miss Bonfire Night," I mumbled to myself. I closed my eyes and gritted my teeth."

"You ain't the only one."

Someone was here with me? I opened my eyes expecting to see someone in front of me, or to the side of me, or even above me, but I couldn't see anything.

"None of my friends bothered to turn up. Even Rainbow Dash said she was too busy to come watch the fireworks with me." A sigh followed. "It ain't fun watchin' it on your own…"

As I kept listening to this young, child-like voice, I spun around to find where it was coming from. Then I saw someone. It was a child—a little filly, same size, size age as Apple Bloom. Orange with a forward mane of deep purple. Tiny little wings sat either side of her back. Her head hung low as she stared at the ground. Poor girl…

"Who were you gonna watch it with?" I asked. I felt bad not trying to comfort her as a first priority, but I needed something clarified.

"Sweetie Belle and Apple Bloom," she replied, her tone bordering on frustration. "They said they were gonna meet me here…"

I felt worse. "I'm sorry they're not here. I'm… Well I'm partially to blame."

She turned to me. I expected her to pause, to scream, to do something in regards to what I was. But she didn't say or do anything to reflect upon any sort of fear she might have had towards me. No, it was more like anger than fear. "What? Were you better company for them?" she spat as she glared at me. "Was I not good enough to see the fireworks with?"

"It's nothing like that. Honest." She didn't believe me though. She still shot pins at me with her eyes. "I was helping Apple Bloom make a new banner for her club house. We spent a long time on it, and she was real exhausted when we finished. She went straight to bed."

With each word I spoke, the filly's expression softened. "She spent all day working on the banner?"

"You know about it?"

"Of course I do!" Her lips spread across her muzzle into a grin of accomplishment as she spoke, " Me, Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle made the club house!" And then from accomplishment to sheepish. "Uh, actually… Applejack made it for us. But we founded the Cutie Mark Crusaders!" She then raised an eyebrow at me. "Are you a new crusader?"

"No, I'm just… I was just passing."

"So you ain't lookin' for a special talent?"

Oh, I had a special talent. It just wasn't a good one. Not something I was proud of. "No," I replied. "What's your name, anyway?"

"I'm Scootaloo. And you?"

"Summers."

I wasn't sure if it registered with her; she just glanced from side to side as if looking for something. Her attention turned to the sparkling setting of Ponyville below us. "What about Sweetie Belle?" asked Scootaloo. "Why didn't she show up?"

I didn't know what hurt more: the fact that I couldn't give an answer, or the fact that I couldn't give her ease of mind. "I don't know. I guess Rarity asked her to give her a hand with her work."

"Oh…" she gave another sigh as her head hung. She patted at a patch of grass with a hoof. "And Rainbow Dash…"

It was that tone of a strained voice and a crushed heart that I understood her hurt fully. It wasn't just a friend spending time with a friend. No, it was more than that. It was a young pegasus looking up to their mentor; an admiring fan to their greatest idol. It must have meant a lot for her to get to spend a night's celebration with Rainbow Dash. It reminded me of when I was young, sitting on the sofa every Saturday at 10am in the morning and watching my favourite wrestlers—Undertaker, Rock, Big Show, Jericho—watching them perform and put their bodies on the line with spectacular performances. I wanted to be the next Rock… just like how Scootaloo wanted to be the next Rainbow Dash.

A loud, whistling noise torpedoed through one side of my skull and out the other, bringing me out of my thoughts. I jumped up, almost smacking the back of my head on the tree trunk as I looked up to see what it was. A small spark of light shot up into the sky with a grey trail of smoke left in its wake. Suddenly it exploded into a shower of sparkling purple and green, filling the night sky with colour.

"I guess the fireworks started," spoke Scootaloo. I could see the crushing disappointment on her face.

I moved around beside her. I placed a hand on her withers, caressing her fur with my palm. "Why don't we watch the fireworks together?" I asked I smiled as best I could given the tension. I hated seeing her—seeing anyone—like this. "It'll be fun."

"I… " Scootaloo hiccupped, and her shoulders tensed up as she shrugged them. Her lips began to quiver. Her mouth opened, mouthing words that I couldn't read. A sob escaped her throat, followed by another. Her eyes shut closed tightly, and a bead of tear trickled down her cheek. "I just wanted to watch the fireworks with my friends…!"

I couldn't bear it. My throat and my chest tightened as the poor girl sobbed and cried in front of me. I felt my chest crack and shatter as I sat their powerless to help her. I took my hand away from her and… I just watched. I didn't know what to do. I didn't know what I should do.

But I knew what I could do. I leaned forward and wrapped my arms around Scootaloo, cradling her in my arms. Gently I pulled her towards me; she gave no resistance as though she couldn't even feel it or even notice it. I held her close to me, wrapping her in my caring embrace. It reminded me of when I met Trixie. It was that feeling all over again.

"It'll be okay, Scootaloo," I cooed softly into her little ear. She kept sobbing, her tears soaking into my shirt. But I didn't care. I was gonna hold her like this until she stopped, and I was gonna keep on cuddling her until she felt better. "You'll get to see Rainbow Dash later, and then you can watch the later fireworks together."

I felt Scootaloo nuzzle against my collarbone, wiping her nose and eyes against my shirt. Then her glinting, tearful eyes turned up at me. "W…Will you watch the fireworks with me?"

I guess she didn't register what I said earlier. I smiled at her and ran my thumb along the top of her cheek, wiping away the tears that matted her fur. "Of course I will."


Another firework shot into the air, whistling its cry as it shot towards the stars before exploding into a fount of blues, oranges, greens and purples. Kinda reminded me of Rainbow Dash.

I smiled as I relaxed back against the tree with Scootaloo sat in my lap, her legs sticking outwards like a baby kitten, the both of us watching as the fireworks shot one after the other. Every so often Scootaloo would cry out in amazement as some of the bigger, louder fireworks exploded into shimmering clouds and spheres of smoke, sparkles and flashes of shining colours. At times she would point out how the firework made a shape of a Wonderbolt symbol or something else that, admittedly, I didn't quite understand.

It was a complete turnaround from moments ago. She was all cheery, wide-eyed, excited, smiling. I felt better, especially for her. This is what I wanted to see; not her upset and crying, but smiling and having a good time like she should be doing on a night like this.

Minutes went by as silence fell on the night. The smell of firework smoke hung in the air and the sight of sparkling colours still littered the streets of Ponyville below. "I guess that's all they're doing for the moment," I spoke out. "They'll do more later, right?"

"Yeah, they always have a break before they fire off the really awesome ones," replied Scootaloo. "I'd better go and find Rainbow Dash. Hopefully she won't be too busy now."

"I hope so too, Scootaloo."

The little pegasus hopped off my lap before galloping across the hill. Suddenly she stopped and turned to me. "Hey, Summers? Thanks for watching the fireworks with me."

I smiled. And I wanted to shed a tear for her. "You don't have to thank me, Scootaloo. And don't tell anyone you were with me."

"Huh? Why not? Don't the other ponies like you?"

"Something like that. Promise you won't say anything, okay?"

I saw the confusion and uncertainty In her eyes. But she nodded regardless. "Okay. I promise."

"Thanks." She turned back towards Ponyville and ran down the hill as fast as her little legs could carry her. And all I could do was lay back against the tree and look back up at the stars. A tear rolled down my cheek.

Chapter 15 - Cycle of the Moon, Part 1

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I crossed one arm over my lap. Then the other. Both of them had no feeling for a moment, but then they began to tingle a little. I lurched forward, my eyes still closed and seeing nothing but black. My whole body felt light, almost as if I was made of feathers and fluff. Slowly I opened my eyes, but squinted as soon as the light struck out at me. Despite the sudden glare, my eyes didn't burn as you would think. It was calming, soothing. My eyes opened fully to a sight that baffled me.

The hill I was on suddenly had flowers all around me. The morning sun shone upon them, with their bright petals and wax-layered leaves shining in the light. Even the grass somehow grew longer in the God knows how many hours I had been asleep. I looked up and saw little pink petals fall from the blossoming flowers on the branches above me, one of them landing on the end of my nose.

So many things ran through my mind: where did all this stuff come from? Was this normal? Did this tree always have pink flowers on it?

But before I could even begin to contemplate reasons or explanations in my mind's eye, the sun suddenly dipped behind a cluster of thick clouds, casting a huge shadow over the hill—and only the hill. I felt uneasy. My arms shivered.

"I've never seen such a creature as you before."

I sprung to my feet so quick that I swore I must have jumped at least ten feet from where I sat. I bolted round, looking back at where I was, cautious to whether this voice was friend or foe. "Who are you? Where are you?" I called out. "Show yourself!"

And they did. Rather, she did. A tall pony, much taller than any I have seen before, stepped from behind the tree slowly, one hoof after another. She was covered in fur of darkened indigo, with her bright aqua eyes being the greatest of contrast. Large, feathered wings sat folded on either side of her, slightly obscuring the black patches on her hind legs, but not obscuring the white crescent moon on her flank. Her attire consisted of only dull blue-silver horse shoes, a bib-like piece of black cloth she wore around her neck with another crescent moon on it, and a pitch-black crown on her head that perched upon her long horn.

And her mane. God, it was so long, flowing, and probably extremely fluffy. It even sparkled in whatever sunlight could touch upon it, like stars in the sky. And I wanted to play with it so badly.

"Please, do not feel threatened," she spoke out with the utmost of good intentions, but I still held my ground. "I do not wish harm upon you. Rather, I would like to speak with you."

A sudden flashback of me speaking with Twilight struck my mind. The horn, the wings, the politeness, the approach; it was like I was meeting her again. Her crown made me realise why. "You're another princess, right?" I asked.

"Of course," she replied. "I am Princess Luna; co-ruler of Equestria; the Princess of the Night." She furrowed her brow at me and scowled. "And why is it that you do not know of who I am? Was I really that forgettable?"

"No! I-I'm sure you're a really amazing princess—uh, Princess Luna!" I felt that if I didn't diffuse the situation fast, she was gonna throw me down the hill, then carry me back up just to throw me back down again. "I'm not from around here. Or… anywhere for that matter."

She raised her eyebrow. "You confuse me. You must be from somewhere." I explained to her my predicament, about how I was a human from another world different from Equestria. But she wasn't fazed by anything that I had told her. No, instead she turned her head away in though, yet spoke aloud, "What Twilight Sparkle said seems true…"

"What do you mean?" I asked her pressingly. "What does Twilight know? Does she know how to get me home?"

"In a manner of speaking." Her words filled me with hope, if only a little. I braced myself for the bad part of her explanation. "Twilight had used an ancient relic from the Crystal Empire—the Crystal Mirror—to traverse from this world to another world; a human-mirrored Equestria of sorts. I believe it to be your world, but…"

"But what?"

"The Crystal Mirror's magic only activates once every thirty moons."

"… And how long is a "moon"?"

"Coincidentally it's around thirty days. Or a month."

"… You ffffffff-flipping what!?" If I yelled any louder I would had turned my lungs inside out. "I have to wait thirty months!? That's… That's—!"

"Two and a half years."

"—Two and a half bloody years, yes!" I felt my face burn up so much that I couldn't help but place my hands on my cheeks to see if I could melt the skin on my palms. "I—Just—Gyahhh! Goofle-flamps!"

"Please, human, you must calm down!" I heard Luna call out. "You're starting to speak gibberish!"

Right. Yes. I need to calm down. Deeps breaths, Summers, take deep breaths…

"What is a "goofle-flamp" anyway?"

"I don't know, darn it!" I exploded, swinging my arms into the air as my voice boomed across the hilltop. I stomped forwards. "Right—you, me, Crystal Mirror, now!"

"I'm sorry, but I can't take you there."

"What do you mean, 'you can't take me there'? It's in your possession, right? Just take me to where it is!"

"I mean, I cannot physically take you there. You're in a dream. You're sleeping right now."

A dream? What was she talking about? "You're kidding me, right?" I responded with a grim without humour as I turned to her. "If I was in a dream, then why does everything seem so… real?"

"Including the sudden blossoming flowers and the shadow cast over this hill—and this hill alone?"

She had a point. And I could do nothing but submit to the fact that I could do nothing, and to the helplessness that I felt. "I just… I can't stay here for two and a half years! I can't even stand going to London for a couple days to see friends. I get too homesick, and…"

"… And what?"

I looked down before I slowly knelt down, sitting cross-legged in the grass. I saw her in my mind's eye as clear and though she was there, with her greying, curly hair and her calming smile. "… Ah, it's nothing important," I said as I looked up with a smile. "But seriously, I can't stay here for that long."

"I understand, uh…"

"Summers."

She paused for a moment, then chuckled behind a hoof held against her mouth. "Summers… Such a bright name," she admired. I gave an awkward smile in return. "I understand your plight, Summers, but there's nothing I can do to make the Mirror's magic work any faster." She walked towards me, and with every step I could feel her tower over me in every aspect one huge sum at a time. It was like I was in the presence of a deity rather than a princess. "But believe me when I say that we will do whatever we can to make you feel welcome here in Equestria."

"We?" I repeated as I stood to my feet. "You and the other princesses who rule Equestria?"

"Me and everypony in Ponyville. You will find no nicer place in all of Equestria than the folk of Ponyville, so Princess Twilight insists."

Yeah, and I have the cracked ribs, glass shards, grazed knees, and the mental trauma to prove it…

"Though I must ask, Summers: you addressed me as "another princess". Have you per chance met with Twilight Sparkle already?"

"Ahah. Yeah, something like that. I got to talk with her a little bit."

"Well that is good! You are making friends already!"

"Yeah, you could say that…"

"And did she bestow upon you her new friend cuddle?"

My heart skipped a beat. And then it died. "… How… How do you know about her cuddles?"

"My sister, Princess Celestia, receives letters from Princess Twilight almost daily regarding her progressive learning in friendship. One of the letters told of her friend Pinkie Pie teaching her of a special "new friend cuddle", though I dare say that I now of what it entails…" Her thoughtful expression soon turned to one of absolute glee, like a child waiting to open their biggest Christmas present. "So did she cuddle you?"

How was I supposed to answer that? If I said "no", then she would think I did something horrible, or she was being callous in not giving me one. But if I said "yes", then she would start asking me questions about it… and she'll probably get the bright idea to cuddle me too. That was certainly something I wouldn't be able to deal with.

I thought it best to be direct, truthful, and sincere. That always gets best results.

"… Um… No. I jumped out the window and ran like crazy before she could."

Okay, maybe that could have come out just a little bit better…

Luna glanced at me, and soon became staring when it was apparent that I had no follow up. Her eyes glazed over and her pupils dilated as she, from what I could tell, tried to physically cause me to explode with her mind. The corner of her lips twitched, then her brow furrowed.

"What do you mean you ran away!?" she shot out at me, but she didn't let me get a word in edge-ways as she screamed out at me, "You do not turn down a new friend cuddle! It is impolite, rude, and scornful!" Her mouth opened so wide as she yelled in my face that I thought she was gonna bite my head off half-way through.

I panicked. I stood back from her, but with every step I retreated she pushed forward. "P-Princess Luna," I stuttered, "you need to calm down! You're practically foaming at the mouth!" Oh, what a role switch this was.

"You would dare turn down a best friend cuddle from Princess Twilight—A royal best friend cuddle!" Her wings splayed outwards in such an impressive wingspan that it was like she blocked out the whole sun.

And she did. Dark clouds formed above and around us, turning the dark hill and sunlit backdrop into a realm of shadow. I felt the winds beat and batter at my body and swirling violet mists circled around the both of us, forming a ring. But that was nothing compared to the mischievous, almost sinister grin on her face. "If you will not accept a new friend cuddle from Twilight Sparkle… then you will receive an even greater one from the Princess of the Night!"

And somehow, despite the thought I put into that reply, I ended up with both the outcomes I didn't want.

I yelped as tendrils of faded indigo spouted from the mists around my ankles. I stumbled backwards through the wall of smoke behind me, tumbling down the side of the hill and planting my backside on even ground. I shook my head and looked up, watching as the ring parted to the sides as Luna stepped through. She looked down at me, with that same grin plastered across her lips.

"Would you like to play a game, Summers?" she spoke with an almost sing-song melody. "Let's see how long you can outrun me before I catch you. I'll even give you a ten second head start."

I couldn't tell if she was being serious or if she was joking, and ten seconds wasn't long enough for me to think about it. I clawed at the grass as I pulled myself to my feet, sprinting away from her as fast as I could. It wasn't nearly as fast as I thought I was going, though.

You ever have one of those dreams where you're running away from something, but you can't run properly or you're just running really slowly, and that no matter how hard you try they always end up catching up to you?

Yeah, That's what was happening. She could have given me a ten day head start and I wouldn't have covered any distance. I could even feel her breath on the back of my neck.

I was truly boned.

Chapter 16 - Cycle of the Moon, Part 2

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Both of my legs began to feel numb. It wasn't an anaesthetic feeling, but more like one of sudden coldness. No, not coldness… Fear. It was like I had just stared death in the face, and his visage alone paralyzed me. But then again, I guess being cuddled by a strange pony princess in the middle of the night was almost the same thing.

I felt a warm gust of air beat against the back of my neck, sending a shiver that ran right down my spine. I felt my skin crawl, goose bumps forming on my arms. And then I felt something tickle the sides of my neck, then trailing quickly along my cheek. It wasn't until my eyes shifted from looking at the ground that I saw the starry haze of indigo flutter to the side of my head, that mane of hers waving about.

A giggle—no, more like a devious chuckle—sounded into the side of my ear. Her head was only inches behind my own, her stifled laughing breathing rhythmic vents of warm breath down my neck again. I dared not turn around. I couldn't. It was like I was having a horrible night terror that I just couldn't do anything within; I couldn't move, my breathing was almost nonexistent, and I was so terrified that I just couldn't turn to face her. It was like trying to convince myself that if I don't look at her then she'll just go away. But I knew, no matter how much I wanted it, that wasn't gonna happen. It was a night terror after all.

A ticklish sensation brushed around the outer ridges of my ear coupled with gentle breaths of air washing through it. The short fur on Luna's snout brushed casually against the skin, whispering something that should never, ever scare a mature adult.

"Boo!"

Admittedly, though bitterly, I overreacted way more than I should have done. I let out an ear-piercing shrill like a terrified four year old girl and jumped heights only Olympic pole-vaulters could dream of. Suddenly my entire body reacted as though completely driven by survival instinct. I leapt forwards as far as I could from her, stumbling and tripping on the grass as I collapsed on my hands and knees. I scrambled up as quick as I could, clawing at the soil to try and drag myself away even if it was only an extra inch; an extra inch gained was an extra inch further from her. And as I clambered back to my feet, long strides carried me as far and as fast as my legs allowed.

I dared not turn back. My only focus was trying to cover whatever ground I could, to find some way of just getting out of this dream. As I sprinted across the fields I tried to do whatever usually worked when I was having a bad dream—Closing my eyes tight and wishing it away; lifting my head as fast as I could; holding my hands out in front of me and clawing them apart like I was tearing a hole open. But nothing. Nothing worked, not even in the slightest. And so my legs kept me just running through the meadow tirelessly. It was all I knew to do.

And yet I felt uneasy. My sprint was without end, and so was this meadow. It wasn't until several moments later that I began to realize that I was just running around in an endless loop. I noticed patches of flowers pass by me over and over again, those same daisies bordered by lilacs. In my shock and denial of what was happening, I stopped on the spot. Even the dark skies and the clouds had not shifted in however long I had been here.

I began to ponder on what was going on, thoughts rushing through my head like motorway traffic. And it wasn't until I got to about a mile through those thoughts that I saw the horrific crash that was my conclusion. if I was running in loops, nothing changing at all... then does that mean Luna was still close behind me?

I didn't know what to expect, but in the split second decision to turn around I felt a sense of dread wash over me. But as I turned behind me... she was gone. Completely. No trace. The hill was still there, plain as the nose on my face, complete with the large tree that I was leaning against. But Luna was nowhere to be seen.

And no matter how much I tried, I couldn't wash that sense of dread off of me. It clung like a stain on a shirt, and it wasn't gonna come off no matter how much I mentally scrubbed. If she wasn't there, then exactly where was she?

My skin tingled as a cold sweat dripped from my brow and down my cheek. It hit me almost as soon as I had thought that. Against my better judgement, I turned around. Slowly.

"I'm right here."

A shrill escaped my tightened throat as my body flung itself backwards so hard that I ended up just collapsing onto my back as though someone just emptied a chamber of twelve gauge shells into my chest at point-blank range. I didn't even focus on the ache and pain of landing hard on the ground, but perhaps there wasn't any to feel at all; it was all a dream, after all. Yet everything felt so real… especially my terror of her.

"I must admit that it is quite fun watching you run round and round like a hamster. You're certainly got some good speed on you, that's most certain." Her grin sent chills up my spine, and made my limbs ache numb. She was still just toying with me, perhaps demonstrating how in control she was in this land of sleep. But it was that absolute control that terrified me the most; she could do anything she wanted. Absolutely anything. "But now… I think it's time we upped the tempo of our game, wouldn't you agree?"

I didn't respond. Didn't even so much as part my lips to let out even the smallest of whines. My teeth gritted and clenched together so hard that I could feel the strain of my lower jaw. I gazed back at her, trying to push myself away with my legs as best I could but my feet felt like lead, barely able to tug them back towards me let alone trying to push at the ground with them.

Another stifled giggle purred from the lips of Luna as she stood there, staring right through my soul with those aqua eyes of hers, locking with mine. She sounded so innocent, so playful, that it was hard for me to even fathom that she was doing this to me. But that thought was soon drowned by her grinning chuckle. That sweet, high voice of hers soon lowered into a more sinister tone as she bared her teeth—her fangs—at me. That dark chuckle soon became a maniacal laughter as she lurched forwards. Her whole body lunged forwards, pouncing at me with her forelegs outstretched like a tiger pouncing upon its wounded prey. I cried out as my arms flung themselves up in front of my chest and body, my legs suddenly finding strength to curl up against my body as I braced for what was most likely going to be three hundred-odd pounds of pony glomp.

But what I felt instead was a strong gust of wind that blasted against me. I felt the pressure beat against my limbs, my body and my head as it battered against my clothes, tingled the hairs on my arms as it went down my sleeves, and ruffled the hair on my head. For a moment I paused, until I peaked up past my crossed arms. My eyes opened sharply as I saw nothing but continuous darkness and old, dank, shrivelled trees that lined a soil-ridden dirt path upon which I sat curled upon. The entire scenery around me had changed, and none for the better. The air was as cold as death itself, carrying the scent of autumn about it; the smell of rain-soaked soil, damp bark and dead leaves filled my nose as I breathed in.

My feet shifted ever so slightly to reveal how loose and light the ground beneath me was, and yet left no stains or markings on my shoes. As my hands touched the ground to push myself up it didn't even feel like what my eyes would have suggested it would. The black soil looked soaked from heavy downpour, and yet felt like a mix of soft clay and dried sand against my palms. Even as I stood myself up the soil did nothing to stain or cling to the rear or leggings of my pants.

Nothing at all made sense here. But perhaps that was exactly what Luna wanted—to toy with my senses and to dismantle logic to disorientate me. And she was doing a fine job of doing just that.

I didn't know what to expect or from such a place as this. I didn't know what to do or even where to go. The only thing I could see was whatever scenery was within several meters in front of me, and it was just the same repeating soil and trees over and over again. With nowhere else to go, I proceeded onward.

Each step sounded like I was trudging through small cobblestones, and each breath I took made my nose hairs stand on end from the rustic stench of decaying nature. The wind howled past my neck and ears, its cold touch feeling like ice against bare skin. And yet none of it bothered me after the first few yards. It wasn't until a few more meters that I realised that I was just walking aimlessly.

A sudden distortion of howls and gasps echoed through the forest for a second before I heard Luna's voice sound through the skies. "I am quite surprised," her voice reverberated with a ghost-like echo. "Others would find horror in seeing their world turned upside down, but you… You are different. In fact, you only seem to find terror before the Princess of the Night." There was a pause before a tired sigh followed. "Are there still those who fear me? Are there still those who look upon me and see only Nightmare Moon?"

She was right. I had not paid much mind to it but she was right. All of this imagery and the twisting of sense and logic was nothing to me. It was just her that scared me, irrationally so. And yet her last words confused me, though it was only to my own lack of knowledge about her.

"Your world doesn't scare me, I'm afraid," I replied in turn regardless if she could hear me or not. No pun intended, either. "Every night I sleep finding myself within a dream such as this to the point where the lack of sense becomes… normal. Bad dreams, nightmares, night terrors, they all are the same to me—figments of the subconscious that you must face in sleep because you refuse to confront them in wake." What came after was mere silence. I waited for a response but all I heard was the rustling of the swaying branches.

Then she spoke once more, showing that she could hear my words. "Very deep for a human. I am impressed." Well it was nice to know that she had a low opinion of humans. I guess Twilight told her things of humans that weren't quite shining. "But then I must wonder, Summers, what it is you refuse to face in your wake that you have constant nightmares."

"Something that I would prefer to leave in my subconscious. Leave it buried there for all time with not even a tombstone to remind me of what it was."

"You mean to say that you cannot remember?"

"That's right."

In our conversation I had not realised that the sky was beginning to lighten. I looked up through the arch-formed branches above me and saw that sky turn from a colourless pitch black to a faint yet noticeable indigo. Just staring up at it reminded me of the fine fur on Luna's body.

"Is that why you do not like cuddles? Because they scare you?"

A sudden jolt ran through my body and my mind. I felt something just click in my brain, like a floodgate opening and releasing opaque waves of thoughts and, I think, memories that were mottled and dull in that I couldn't tell what they were. I felt my chest tighten a little. "I don't know."

Before I could even begin to shift through the images in my head, my attention was drawn to the sudden dispersion of everything around me. Like a blast of wind splitting through the middle, everything before me parted and tore away to the sides. The trees split and disintegrated to nothing more than black powder, swept away in a powerful current, while the soil beneath me melded back into the dirt as grass began to grow in its place. The entire scenery shifted from that deadened forest back to the grassy, flowered meadow.

Chapter 17 - Cycle of the Moon, Part 3

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"Well that was certainly a surprise," I heard Luna's voice exclaim from behind me. As I turned to face her, her hoof rested on my chest before a rather powerful shove sent me falling back onto my rear. "But I guess there's always more than one way to reach the end of the game." Her eyes gazed down at me half closed, coupled with a grin spread upon those dark lips of hers. "So, Summers—" suddenly dark, cloudy tendrils sprouted from the ground and coiled around my wrists and ankles "—is there anything you would like to say before you receive the Best Friend Cuddle of the Night?"

A rather apt name for it, I admit. I tugged on the tendril around my right hand and… it moved. It was only a few centimetres but it definitely moved. Then everything came to me. The falling through the ring of darkness, to the scenery just vanishing in front of me, and now with these tendrils feeling so easy to break away from… it became apparent that it wasn't just pony magic that didn't work on me, but also Luna's own power didn't work on me either. In was only in my terror that I had just let it take hold.

Oh, now it's payback time. Now it's a whole new game.

A grin crept along my face as I gazed back at her. "Not much, except… You've just activated my trap card!" Her expression twisted from that overconfident, victorious smirk to a more confused, concerned looked—a look that I thought suited her a lot better. My hands turned, palms against the grass as I pushed off of them, quickly sitting up. The tendrils uncoiled around my wrists submissively as my whole body lunged forwards. My arms wrapped around her waist as I sprung to the side of her, my whole weight forcing forwards into a pouncing tackle as it near enough pushed her whole body off the ground, making her yelp rather loudly. She was quite light for such a large pony. or maybe I was just really strong in this dream world. Ah, it didn't matter either way.

An 'oof!' was forced out of the both of us as she landed onto her back softly against the grass, landing between a couple of flowers to either side of us, while I ended up belly to belly with her. Swiftly I knelt over her, pinning her down under my hips as my legs lay beside her, my hips straddling her own as I looked down at her. Now it was my time to grin and look victorious—and look completely awesome doing it too.

"Y'know, for what it was worth, I had a lot of fun playing prey in that little cat and mouse game of yours, Princess," I spoke admittedly. My hands rested gently on her chest as my body hunched forwards ever so slightly. "But I think it's my turn to pick a game. Oh, and it's one I'm really good at too."

Her bright eyes widened as my face drew closer to hers. Her forelegs tucked inward like a kitten being all cute like. Well, she was kinda cute like that. "And… exactly what game is this?" she asked. Her hips and withers shifted frantically as she tried to wriggle her way out of it, but I think we both knew she wasn't going anywhere.

"Oh it's a rather simple game. No running or anything. It's called, 'Let's tickle Princess Luna until she begs for mercy'!"

A squeaky whimper pierced past her lips as the pupils of her eyes shrunk to little pinpricks. "You… You wouldn't! I am a Princess! You would dare unmercifully tickle royalty!?" Oh, yes. Yes I would. And I was gonna start with that fluffy tummy of hers. As I reclined back a little, my fingers trailed along to her stomach. Little jolts of her muscles gave away her ticklish nature, and I was gonna exploit it harder than the Mario Bros level select trick. My hands ran to either side of her, and my fingers began to slowly curl and dance against that soft skin of hers. "Gah! N-no, stop! S-stop this at once! Desist! I-I command you!

"Stop? But I've only just started!" I replied in defiance, and boy did it feel amazing. My palms clamped down on either side of her stomach, holding it in place while the tips of my fingers worked their magic. A high pitched yelp came from the pinned pony as they curled and tickled against her sides and a little around her tummy. "And besides, the game only stops when you beg, not when you command."

It was just too adorable watching this lofty Princess be taken down a notch or two. Or twenty. Seemed as though the Princess and the Night became the Princess of the Squealing what with the babbling noises coming out of her mouth. "Nyaahahah! Y-you are horri—Eeeeeh!—Horrible! Please, please stop! I insist! Pleaseeee!"

She began to shuffle so much that even I was beginning to rock from side to side from it, but she was totally not going anywhere else. Her forelegs began to bang on the ground beside me, which was fine by me; would rather she hit the ground than hit me. Then again, I was surprised that she hadn't tried to do anything to force me off of her other than rock from side to side. She didn't try to push me off with her forelegs or even to just whack me away with her wings.

Was she… enjoying this?

I pushed the thought to one side, and just kept the relentless onslaught of tickles. "Oooooh you're getting closer! But pleading isn't the right thing either." Leaning forward once more, I let my hands glide along her sides until they were just under her ribs, making Luna blurt another hysterical yelp. I was gonna be nice though, and give her a bit of breathing room; her chest kept expanding and contracting in a quick rhythm as she caught her breath. I'm sure five seconds was plenty of time. "What if we went a little more upward, hm?" More tickle tortured ensued as that generous little window of pause soon faded.

"Oh, no! No, no, no, no—Eeeeeeh!" A shriek of hysteria pierced the skies as she tried to buck her body up to push my hands away from her, but they weren't going anywhere. "Nooohohoho! Stop it, stop it, stop iiiihihit! I-I give up! Mercy! I plead for mercyhyhyyyy!"

Well that didn't take long. A couple of minutes at best, but it was fun while it lasted.

But, you know … I didn't say I was gonna stop.

"Ooooh well done, Princess! You won the game! And in a quick time, too!"

Tired and breathing heavy, Luna looked up at me as her body lay slump in the grass. Her abdomen was pushing me up and down as a testament to her heavy inhales for oxygen. "O… Okay… I win… Now remove yourself from my body, Summers…!"

"Huh? Oh no, you misunderstand." Oh I saw that little glimmer of hope in her eyes vanish quicker than a five pound note on the sidewalk. "Because you won the game so quick, you get to play the bonus round! Endurance test!"

"E-Endurance te—" my hands quickly slid up to just under her forelegs, tickling and teasing under her pits "—EST! Aaahahahah! Oh gosh, oh gosh, oh GOSH! STAAAHAHAHAHP!" But I wasn't about to. Not yet anyway. Even as all four of her legs kicked, her forelegs tried to push me away weakly, and tears began to stream down her cheeks, I wasn't going to just "Stahp". She had her little fun spooking me, and now I was gonna have my fun torturing her. Every so often I pressed my fingers into her pits, making her jump and squeal as he held her forelegs tight against my fingers, but that only made things more ticklish for her. "Please, Summers, please stop! I give in! I submit! Oh, mercy! Uncle! Sweet Celestia just STAHAHAHAP!"

I guess perhaps she did have enough for one night. Generously I relented, slipping my hands out from under her pits and bringing them to my side. For a moment I gazed down at her, the poor mare's eyes were practically rolling to the back of her head as she panted heavily for breath. Slowly I pushed myself standing before lifting a leg over her body, now standing to one side of her hips. Even I found myself, for the first time here, tired. "Phew! Who knew that tickling a Princess would be so much hard work?" I teased as I wiped a hand over my brow. Though my skin was quite cold and no sweat was there, my head felt so hot.

Luna came to somewhat, taking a lungful of air before sitting up to look at me. "That was… That was unfair! Bonus level, my hoof!" she exclaimed with a scowl on her face, though I didn't know whether to be scared of her seriousness or laugh at how cute it made her look. But after a paused she ended up giggling a little to herself. "Although I must admit that I had fun."

I inwardly sighed in relief as my shoulders relaxed a little. But looking down at her sitting there, she seemed more relaxed, more casual than before. It was like watching Queen Elizabeth walk around in jeans and a hoodie. In turn, I sat down in front of her in a similar manner, one leg outstretched while I rested an arm upon the knee of the other. It wasn't like sitting with someone higher than me, with more authority than me. Now it was like relaxing with a friend.

"I had fun too, Princess—"

"You may call me Luna."

"Ah, my apologies… Luna." We both shared a smile as our eyes locked, though I couldn't help but shift them away from her, in thought of a past moment.

"Is there something wrong, Summers?" she asked, shifting her hind legs until she lay prone on her front like an equine would.

"Earlier you mentioned something that caught my mind, though I didn't respond in kind." I paused for a moment. My voice became soft as I spoke, "You said about how ponies look upon you as 'Nightmare Moon'. What did you mean by it?"

I could see that the mere mention of it was a painful thing, whatever it was. Her smile turned upside down just repeating the words 'Nightmare Moon'. to her. For a moment to remained silent before she spoke with a distant voice. "A thousand years ago, me and my sister, Celestia, ruled Equestria as equals, side by side—she by day, and I by night. However… I was jealous. Envious of her. She was able to look on as her subjects frolicked and danced under the light of the sun, while I… I ruled over them as they slept. I had nothing but ruler in title only.

And in my hubris, I was overtaken by darkness. That darkness transformed me into Nightmare Moon. I fought with my sister, intending to spread darkness through the whole of Equestria and become the one to rule all. But my sister… She did what she had to do. She banished me with the power of the Elements of Harmony to the moon, until I returned one thousand years later.

But Twilight… Twilight Sparkle and her friends saved me from that darkness, and I have returned to being a princess beside my sister."

For every word that she spoke and through every expression I watched, I saw this pony tear herself in half as she relived a powerful, regretful experience. I didn't know what to say, and I didn't know what to do. For what seemed like antiquity we sat in silence as our eyes gazed at the floor before us. And for some reason, I too began to ache. I didn't know whether it was for her, or if my own memories were beginning to resurface, but that tightening knot in my chest came back again.

I could only grim and bare it though. But I smiled a little as I gazed up at the sullen princess. "They must really care about you." It was all I could say to try and brighten the mood I didn't have a reason or thought to why I said it, but I did. Everything else was to be played by ear.

"I… I guess you are right."

"There's no guessing about it, Luna. Instead of killing you, Celestia instead banished you. Though you are her sister, I think she did it for another reason. I think… No, I know, that she banished you because she had hope that one day you would be saved. And that hoped definitely paid off… don't you think?"

It was good to see that smile return to her face. She nodded before replying, "I would certainly agree with that, Summers. Without my sister and Princess Twilight, who knows what might have happened."

"Ah, there's no point dwelling in the 'what ifs' when you can live in the "what is'. Right now, you have your sister back and you've made a bunch of new friends."

"Including you?"

"… Yes, including me."

Luna giggled behind a hoof before her wings expanded and lifted her off the ground some feet, carrying her before she plonked herself beside me. I edged away a little to give her a little room to tuck her wings away. And then a little more as she leaned into me. "You know… we never finished my game, you know?"

"… Eh?"

Before I even clocked on to what she was talking about, her wing flashed outwards and wrapped around me like a blanket, dragging me towards her and holding my body against hers. "Gotchya! I win!" she cried out almost too eagerly.

"Ugh… Yeah, you got me." For a moment I was a little pouty. But a little smile sprawled along my lips before I turned and wrapped an arm around her withers. "I've got you too!"

The both of us giggled as we held each other around the shoulders, feeling more like a chum's night out that it did just an acquaintance meeting. But in the end the both of us nudged a little closer as our arms wrapped around one another. Luna rested her chin upon my shoulder while mine nestled against her collarbone. I couldn't help but just nuzzle my cheek against that soft fur of hers. Was like hugging a kitten.

"For something you're so scared of, you seem to cuddle rather well," she teased.

"Oh shush and just enjoy the moment."

Chapter 18 - Class In Session

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From behind my eyelids I could feel the sunlight strike my senses. My sightless vision turned from pitch black to a pale, dark orange as the light beat against the lids. The contrast bore into my skull as I tried to clench my eyes tighter to try and defend myself from the assault, but it only ended up hurting my eyes all the more. I tossed and turned myself to one side, burying my head against the tree until at last the blackness overtook my sight once more.

A long, drowsy yawn escaped my mouth. Perhaps it was about time I woke up. Ugh, but the taste of morning breath ever lingered on the palette of my tongue, horrific and decaying. Some milk and frosted flakes wouldn't go amiss right now. Maybe some breakfast with my new 'best friend'? Hah, such a thought still left a sense of humour in my mind. As those thoughts wandered, another softer yawn passed my lips, coupled with a gentle smile that sprawled across my lips. Slowly my eyes began to open, letting in those blinding rays of sunrise light little by little until my vision was undeterred by it.

"Good… Good morning, Luna," I spoke groggily, my voice straining a little as my arms stretched forwards, then upwards. My back arced a little against the trunk of the tree, a couple of stiff joints popping as I reached the peak. As my body relaxed, my eyes fully opened. But there was no sight of the princess. My head scanned from left to right, taking in the view of the crystal clear skies, the glistening horizon, the fluttering petals of the flowers and the blades of grass before me, and the bustling morning town below. And yet I caught no sight of her. "I guess… it was all just a dream…?" It was a thought that lingered in the back of my mind, but one that I couldn't come to terms with until the moment I spoke it. And when I did, it made more sense. Of course it was just a dream—I was asleep, after all. But then that realisation became bitter like dark chocolate on the tip of my tongue. Why would any princess come talk to me without us even meeting?

As I pushed off of the tree trunk, I felt something scrape and scratch along my shoulder blades. Reaching back with a hand, I felt something sticking up from the back of my shirt. A finger and thumb pinched something thin yet flexible and soft like wool. As my hand came back my eyes locked onto a dark indigo feather I held between my fingers. Slowly I tilted and waved it from one direction to another, followed by the smell of the night sky with each swish. I couldn't help but just chuckle to myself. "Hah. I guess she was real…"

That fact was all that was needed for that bitter taste to turn to sweetness. More than enough to make a big smile on my face, and more than enough for a great start to a new day. But man, I really needed a nice cool glass of milk. Or orange juice. All that vitamin goodness.

I remembered the hill being a lot more steeper than this though. Or maybe it was just all the exhaustion I had yesterday that made it feel like a complete pain to climb, but now the hill felt much easier and much less taxing on my legs to get down it. Part of the grass was cut short, making a sort of makeshift pathway that lead from the peak down to the town below. The pathway began to quickly shift from a path of short grass, to light sand and dirt, to lightly scattered paving stones the closer I approached the town. But like the path, so did my heart change—I was hesitant about setting foot back in. It was like two opposing magnets, with me trying to push against the other but never connecting. My heart raced and my blood flooded into my brain from the tension, the nervousness, the… fear. I feared what would happen if any of those ponies I met yesterday found me again. I know Rarity would likely flay me and use my skin for a new dress line up after what I did to her window, and Applejack would probably kick my rear in for at least an hour after I buried her under all that hay. And Fluttershy… Ugh, just the thought gives me chills!

But I couldn't just run away forever. After all, Princess Twilight was the only pony who could help me even if it was only in the slightest. I had to get back into town and hope that she wasn't too miffed about me running away, and hope that she would still be inclined to help me get home. I was conflicted, but it was one of those times where I just had to charge head first—and not through a window, with any luck. My lungs inhaled sharply, taking a deep breath as a single foot stomped hard onto the cobblestones with an audible tap. With a huge sigh of relief, I took a second step. Then a third. Gosh, it was like learning how to walk again. With this new sense of mobility, I strode on into Ponyville. Just gotta keep the happy thoughts going…

As a matter of fact, this was actually the first time for me taking a stroll through the main square. Running—now that was something I did plenty of before, but taking a nice, casual, relaxing walk? This was something I could get used to. Well, that would be nice if I wasn't getting all the judgmental stares from the ponies all around me. My eyes shifted to each and every one of them as they entered my sight, and every one of them I could read. Perhaps some of them knew it too, their eyes changing from a look of bewilderment and callousness to one of embarrassment or fear as they locked with mine.


"Ugh… This is so stupid. What's with everyone giving me dirty looks every time I walk past?"

"C'mon, Jay-Jay, don't take it so personal. They're all just upset because you're gonna rock the costume contest. After all, you did spend a ridiculously long time—and money—making this. You gotta be more confident! You're gonna rock the contest!"

"… You really think so?"

"You're gonna rock harder than a Metallica tour! You've got this in the bag!"


A sudden shooting pain ruptured through the side of my head. I clenched the side of it, fingers tightening against my skull until the pain of my digging fingers overwhelmed the ache, but it just wouldn't shift. A painful grunt passed through gritted teeth as I tried hard to scratch and claw at my lobe, to do something to try and get rid of the pain, but nothing happened.

"…ey… Hey… You okay there…?" A low, soft, gentle voice carried on the winds and passed my ear. As those words filtered through into my head, the pain began to release its hold on me, almost as if driven back. Slowly my head shifted to the side until I caught a glimpse of a coat of cerise. My eyes shifted further and further up, met with a tuft of petal-like pink hair that covered her forehead and hung at the sides of her neck, draped over her withers. Likewise, her own green apple eyes shifted up to meet with mine. "Do you need to see a nurse?"

I couldn't help but some sense of familiarity about her. The tone and pitch of her voice, the language she used, and the overall aura of her made me feel like I had to talk to her respectfully. "N… No, miss," I muttered under my breath as my hand relinquished the hold on my skull. The pain stopped, but now my head felt bruised. "I'm sure I'll be alright."

"Hmm… Well, if you say so," she replied somewhat hastily, and yet she never took her eyes off of me. She was definitely different, never looking at me like the others did. While the others looked upon me with contempt, she was more… concerned. "You looked like you were in a bit of pain, though. We should probably check your temperature just in case."

"No, really, I—" but before I could even finish my sentence I found myself with a glass thermometer tucked under my tongue. "Ack! Ah thed ahm thine!"

"Now, now, we can't be too careful! You could be running a fever for all we know!" The back of her hoof pressed into my forehead, all the while I could do nothing but just look at her. I hoped that she would leave me alone after, but the look on her face began to twist a little, her eyes squinting ever slightly as her lips grimaced. "Hmm… A little high, but you should be fine."

I groaned a little before spitting out the thermometer, letting it clink off of the stone floor. I was fairly surprised that it didn't break, actually. "Well I'm glad we got that out of the way," I blurted rather bluntly. "Who are you, anyway?"

"Oh, I'm sorry. I forgot to introduce myself. You can call me Miss Cheerilee. I'm a teacher at the Ponyville schoolhouse." Ah, a teacher. so that's why she felt so authoritative. "Perhaps you'd like to introduce yourself to the rest of the class?" she questioned with a smirk turned smile as she chuckled to herself. "A teacher joke, you see?"

A good joke to use on twelve year olds, maybe. "Right… I'm Summers. Pleasure to meet you, Miss Cheerilee."

"Oh, you don't need to call me 'Miss', Summers. We're out of class." A rather awkward smile crept along my lips as I felt a little embarrassed. It was like being back in primary school again… Ugh. "Why don't you have some breakfast with me; tell me about yourself while we eat, too."


I told her what I told most of the other ponies I had met as I sat across from her in what looked and smelled like a diner, munching on a slice of a fried egg sandwich. I was surprised to see her more intrigued than puzzled, but even more so that she was open to confronting me than sitting idly by like the others. I had to ask, though. "So you're not the slightest bit scared of me?"

"Don't talk with your mouth full," she replied back, feeling more like a scolding than a statement.

"S-sorry." I gulped down whatever food I had before I nodded for her to continue.

"Thank you. To answer your question: not particularly."

" 'Particularly'?" I repeated. Seemed an odd choice of words given the circumstance.

"Well, you see, we have quite a few different… um… 'creatures' come to Ponyville from all sorts of places, like the griffons, sometimes dragons, the occasional Ursa Minor, and a few others, so I'm used to seeing all sorts of scary stuff—others, however, perhaps not so much. But you don't look scary to me." She looked almost smug as her words strolled on, only vanishing for a moment as she took a sip through the straw for her apple juice. "And besides, I'm a teacher. I can't be a good role model for my students if I went around treating others badly because of their appearance."

"Hah, a fair point," I mused for a moment as my hand lightly pinched at the soft white of another slice. But as I rose it to head height I began to think rather than eat. "But there are still those who will judge others on appearance alone. I understand first impressions is just an integral part of the way we work, but to make a final judgment on that alone? It's absurd."

"I couldn't agree more, but I can't say that I myself haven't judged a book by its cover from time to time. And I'm sure you have too. We all have, despite us not wanting others to do it to ourselves. It's just one of those self-hypocritical things, I guess."

"Or perhaps we just haven't had good teachers like you when we grew up."

An audible chuckle rumbled from Cheerilee as she reared her head from her drink. A few of the other ponies that sat at a couple of tables around us turned, gazing at the two of us. Not that I cared, by any means. I was having a nice breakfast with a nice pony, and that's all that mattered right now. "Oh, such a sweet talker, you are," she giggled, almost teasing with her tone. It made me feel a little unsettled, to be honest. "But I'm glad we got to talk. I don't often get to socialise, what with all the work and marking to do."

"Yeah, I can imagine," I empathised before finally taking a bite out of the sandwich in my hand.

For a while the both of us remained silent, eating away at our breakfast in what felt like a silent exchange of small talk. Despite neither one of us extending a voice for conversation, I felt maybe the two of us were bonding little by little as we sat together. Every so often I glanced up to watch her take a bite out of her lettuce and tomato sandwich, at times catching her looking up at me in the same vein and sharing a smile.


"Heehee… You got a bit of sauce on your nose, Jay."

"Uh… Hmm…? Did I get it?"

"Not even close! Here, let me get it for you."


"Oh, Summers? Do you want me to pay for your food?"

I managed to catch wind of Cheerilee as I returned from my own mind. I looked around a little, noticing a pale yellow sheet of paper at the edge of the table between the two of us. A mare with a white apron stood at the tableside, looking at me expectantly. My head shifted down to each side of my pockets, back and forth as if I was going to somewhat magically wind my wallet after double checking. I couldn't help but sigh in contempt at myself as I gazed back up to her. "Sorry…"

"Oh, it really is no big deal," she assured me as she reached into a little pouch around her waist, taking a couple of coins from it and placing them on top of the bill. "I didn't really expect you to have money anyway, being from a completely different planet and all." I know she was trying to make me feel better, but it only made me feel worse; she didn't know who I was until after she offered to buy me breakfast. "And a couple of bits isn't a lot for a couple of rounds of egg sandwiches anyway."

"I'll pay you back," I blurted out as she scooted from her seat. My mind wasn't engaged at that point, but my heart was. That's what counted.

"It's nothing, really. Although…" She hummed for a moment as she got to her hooves. She sauntered over to me slowly, her tail swishing from side to side a little more than usual. Now I was really unsettled. "How about a cuddle for the good time? I bet a creature like you gives good cuddles with those long arms of yours."

Long arms? Come on, they weren't that long. They were… average, I'd say. But in any case, it was the least I could do for her. Rather unenthusiastically I stood up from my seat, and turned to her, arms outstretched before slowly wrapping them around the back of her neck and withers. Her, not so much—her forelegs wrapped around me so quick and so tight it was like getting caught in a bear trap. A fuzzy purple bear trap that smelled like daffodils.

"Thought so," I heard her whisper into my ear. "You do give good cuddles." Her forelegs uncurled around me after she praised me, planting them back on the floor before sighing a little. "I guess it's off to school for me. Hope to see you again soon!"

"Yeah… You too," I replied with a gentle wave as she made her way from the diner. With an exasperated sigh of almost euphoric relief as I plonked myself back down on the chair, returning to whatever I had left on my plate. As I picked up the next slice, I caught one of the other ponies glancing over at me past a pair of shades. After a moment of locked eyes he gestured at me with a fist pump and a wink.

"Oh God, what a morning…"

Chapter 19 - Pose for the Camera

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Yes, what a morning it had been. It wasn't enough that I had breakfast with a—admittedly very nice—pony, but I ended up getting bear-hug-cuddled by her in front of dozens of other ponies… And that one guy suggesting I should hit first base with her was something that sent shivers crawling through my skin every time I thought about it. Well, either that or Cheerilee's fine fur still left an impressing on my senses.

Whatever. It was done and dusted and swept in the trash can. At least I can get on with my day doing… well, whatever it was I was doing. I was aware that I came back here in order to face the scorn of Twilight and her friends, but right now… Well, I hadn't a clue what I was going to do. For the moment I just let my feet do the work for me, letting them take me wherever they went while Mr. Brain sat back to think of what to do.

Even with a fairly good night sleep and a nice breakfast I still felt tired. My blurred eyes could just about make out sun from scenery. The overexposure of the light just made everything glaring to look at. It took some effort to focus my eyes to see everything properly, though shading them with a hand certainly helped. As everything came into correct focus I was met by the glares of other ponies staring around at me. Though they were not gazing at me with suspicion or fear or discrimination; or at least not that I could make out. No, it seemed they were more so in awe or expecting of me like I was some sort of knight.

Though to be honest, I would look pretty awesome in some plate. Paladin master class.

My eyes gazed around, shifting left to right to left, scanning the populace that walked the pavement with me. They all followed me with their huge colorful eyes as they walked past me, whether or not they were walking the same or opposite direction as me. I noticed a few of them stood by a shop corner halt their conversation just to glance at me, switching from open voices to hushed tones. Other groups and couples seemed to follow suit.

Some of those conversations I could overhear.

"Do you think he went to see her?" One whispered.

"I dunno. He certainly looks the part," another replied.

"With those clothes, I wouldn't be surprised," a third pony chimed.

What exactly are they talking about? Rarity? I did go see her and get new clothes from there, but from what I had seen of her own creations they weren't exactly in tune with my own fashion. That and the fact that everything she had were designed for ponies, not humans. Mr. Brain decided to switch his work from figuring out what to do next with working alongside Mr. Curiosity to get to the bottom of this. Though I had the sneaking suspicion that this wasn't going to end well.

I paused for a minute and took a quick glance at a couple of ponies I had overheard. I could see them seize up as I caught their glances. Their stone-like stances turned to shaking chains when I approached them. I feared that talking to them might make them melt.

But then again, that does sound funny. Let's give it a shot.

"Sorry to bother you," I spoke up, "but I don't suppose you could tell me who you're referring to?"

The both of them glanced at each other for a second before one of them replied, "Um… We're referring to you…?"

"Um… No, I mean, referring to who it was you thought I went to see."

The two paused. The other of the pair raised an eyebrow. "You mean you didn't go to see her?"

"Um… see who?"

She rolled her eyes. "My gosh, Berry, he didn't go see her!"

"I know, right, Cherry? Talk about missing out!" her friend added with a hipshot.

"Missing out on what?"

"On the event, of course!"

"…What event?"

"Her event at the plaza!"

"Whose event?"

"I can't believe he doesn't know, Berry."

"I know, right, Cherry? Talk about living under a rock!"

I could feel the skin on my forehead ready to tear from the bone with how hard my brow had furrowed from the lost patience. But, I wasn't gonna get mad. Nope, not today. Today was gonna be a good day.

"Look… could you just tell me about the event?"

"Pfft. She sets up the event here every few moons for her fashion magazines!"

"Who? Who sets the up? Rarity?"

"Noooo, not Rarity! Duh, everyone knows Rarity just makes clothes!"

"You woulda thought he'd know something simple like that, Berry."

"I know, right, Cherry? Talk about dense!"

I lost the plot. "Just tell me who's running to event!" I yelled out. At like that, time froze for what felt like ice ages. As soon as I did it, I felt bad.

The two ponies paused for a moment before scowling at me. "Photo Finish, obviously! You shoulda asked that in the first place!"

"Yeah, talk about being rude!" And with that, the both of them strolled on down the street, turning their noses up at me.

Those two are definitely getting first class tickets to Suplex City.


The plaza was completely packed. Everywhere I looked I could only see a rainbow see of brightly coloured ponies gathered around a huge almost opera house-sized stage. Huge sheets of sky blue, indigo and violet cloth curtained the platform, casting a light shadow across the wooden boards that made the flooring. A wide catwalk extended outwards from its center.

Huh. Stage, catwalk, clothes… Did they think I was part of some sort of fashion show? Yeah, that would have been quite the scene. I could imagine it loosely. And thankfully that's where it was going to stay; in my head.

Still, one woulda thought that housing a fashion show would have been done in some sort of indoors event, with fancy lighting and sound cues and whatnot. But then again, looking around the place, I didn't see any sort of venue that would fit the description. I guess they had to make do with what they got.

After a moment I watched the backdrop curtains spread a little from the bottom, pleats pushed against one another as a white stallion in a black suit trotted out, making his way through center stage and onto the catwalk. He stopped around the middle of it before clearing his throat, the sound picked up a little by the microphone he head around the side of his muzzle.

"Mares and gentlecolts, it is with great pleasure that I, Colour Commentary, am to announce the start of the Grand Fashion Gallery, where we will show off the latest, the greatest, most astonishing clothing in Equestria! And of course, what kind of event would this be without the most brilliant of designs from Ponyville!"

A huge boom of cheering and whistles torrented the stage and skies like a crashing sea, engulfing everything in its wake. Least of all my poor eardrums.

"And now, mares and gentlecolts, I would leave you with encouraging words from our host—the one, the only, Photo Finish!"

Another round of cheers couple with hoof-filled applause burst out as another pony made their way onto the stage and down the catwalk, the announcer having departed past her. A sky-blue pony, almost like Rainbow Dash, but with shoulder-length white hair and fringe that framed the top of her huge, rose-tinted glasses. She wore a black and white dress, with the top half striped vertically while a white stripe circled near the bottom of the skirting. Smaller pink bands wrapped around, highlighted by similar coloured diamond-shaped patterns. Yet probably the only thing more profound than her attire was her thick, Austrian accent.

Oh my God, it was like looking at a ponified Anna Wintour.

The crowd soon died down like a tide retreating back into the sea. The plaza became deathly quiet. The pony on stage then spoke, "Ponies! I, Photo Finish… have arrived." Once more the crowd burst into cheer. And once more, my ears bleed. "I come here to Ponyville to show you best of the best in Equestrian fashion! I look for dancing grace! For burning passion! For star-skied glamour! Now, without delay, it is time to make… da magicks!"

Suddenly, from the rafters, spotlights of a variety of rainbow colours shone down upon the shining boards of the stage, circling and spiralling in some sort of light show before the colours aligned themselves horizontally along the main stage. From stage left and right numerous ponies, all dressed in various different styles of dresses; ballroom, masquerade, Victorian, bohemian, blue and black… or was it white and gold? I've no idea.

But there was one dress that stood out from the others. One that I had definitely seen before. It was a royal blue dress, with bright, shining gold trimming near the bottom of the skirt and same coloured rose patterns cascading throughout the cloth. Several small layers of alternating frilled royal blue and gold cloth stacked around the saddle of the pony. The collar and neck around the dress had white frills that met around the chest, fastened by a shining, silk white three fall cravat, adorned with the same rose patterns as the dress but in royal blue. On her head perched a large Victorian-styled hat, again coloured royal blue, with three large white feathers sat at the front that swept backwards

I absolutely fell in love with it the moment I had set eyes on it.

Suddenly music kicked it from the stage speakers, blaring out a bass-filled beat and a steady rhythm. The music seemed fitting enough for the event, especially after the crowd began to get completely pumped with energy. Some of them were beating their heads to the music or swaying from side to side on their hooves.

One at a time the models would strut down the catwalk—or whatever the horse equivalent to strutting down the catwalk was—and showed off their marvelous merchandise, turning and posing for the crowd and cameras that laid eyes upon their figure. It was a sight to behold, for sure. I wasn't one for fashion, and I always thought this kind of stuff was a little silly, but… being at one of these events in person was an experience, and not one that I would dare say was terrible in the slightest.

All around me the crowd was electrifying, probably more electrifying than all the power going through those lights and sound equipment. From the dazzling lights, the beating music, the cheering crowd and the flashing of cameras, it was like being at a live rave than it was being at a fashion show. I was anticipating seeing ponies waving around glow sticks.

Hell, even I was starting to sway to the rhythm.

And then I saw my favourite dress make its way down the catwalk. The mix of blue and gold was just dazzling to behold. Beams of sky blue, pale yellow and crisp white mixed in with the attire in a way that its stark contrast in vivid colours became soft and sweet. Instead of comparing her to the backdrop of the stage, I was comparing her to the village around her. The dress fit so well with Ponyville's architecture that it was completely uncanny. But then again, it was Rarity's design after all. It's never just about the clothes themselves, but the scenery around the clothes too, it seemed.

Who needs a goddess of weaving like Athena when you had Rarity on hand, eh?

As the model came every closer to the edge of the catwalk, I couldn't help but just scream out at her. If there was one way to get your approval across, it was to scream it as loud as you could, in caps lock if possible. Gaming forums taught me that much.

I gave out a loud whistle as she posed, her neck reared back with a fore-hoof across her brow to show off not only the dress, but the chest area too. The drawn back feathers of the head nearly touched the top of her hind. "Woohoo! Work it, girl!" I cried out. "Show us whatchya got!" My cheering and applause was met with a sudden stare from the model, coupled with a light hint of pink on her cheeks before she quickly retreated back to the stage. Most of the ponies around me started to give me a wide birth.

Guess I got a little too into things.

As I decided to keep my hands by my side and keep my voice quiet, I noticed a sudden flash of rose in the light. I saw Photo Finish turn to gaze around in my direction, the light flashing off of her glasses as she turned her head. Suddenly she stopped dead still like a turret locked on to its target. Her eyes met with mine. I felt my heart skip a beat.

"Hold da show!" she called out. The lights stayed on the contestants as they lined up along the stage. The volume of the beats turned down several tens of decibels down. She paced from one side of the catwalk to the corner I was closest at. Her pink lenses flashed once more as her head turned downwards towards me. "You! Your attire! It is…"

Horrible? Ghastly? Something that was picked out from the TK Max rejection bin?

"Wonderful!"

… You what?

"I must bring you on stage!"

I now I was, quite literally, even more into it than I wanted to be.

Before I could even so much as react, let alone object, she nudged her head sideward towards the catwalk. Suddenly a few stallions pushed me from behind with the tips of their heads, nudging me to the edge of the platform before hoisting my up onto it. I stood tall in front of God knows how many ponies in the pastel sea before me, all glaring at me. Not one of them blinked. Not one of them smiled. All of them stood like brain-dead zombies waiting for me to do something. And then they'd probably pounce on me and eat my flesh.

"You! What is your name?"

"Uh, I—" my voice suddenly boomed across the plaza from the stage speakers, making the floorboards rumble under my feet. It was quite jarring to say the least. "… My name is Summers."

"Hm. A bright name for a creature with such bright fashion!" I think she was getting a bit delusional. "Your clothes, they are… simple! And yet they burn with passion! With energy! They make… da magicks! Who is your designer? I must simply know!"

"I… I don't have a designer. But my clothes were made by Blizzard."

"Blizzard… I never heard of such a designer. But if a pony so cold can make designs so burning hot, then I must simply meet them! But first, I want you to pose!"

"… You what?"

"To pose! Pose for the camera! Pose for the audience! Show them your burning hot passion!"

To be honest, the last time I did that was in the bedroom. "Listen, Miss, uh… Photo Finish? I'm really no here to—"

"Less talk, more posing!" With more speed than The Flash, she moved my hands onto the side of my hips, arched my back a bit to pump out my chest, and kept my chin up and looking out ahead. "Good! Hold that pose! Turn up da music!" The rhythm began pick up once more, the bass rumbling through the stage. Flashes of cameras bombarded me every quarter second. Even the crowd was starting to cheer for me.

I felt fantastic!

"Yes, keep going!" I heard Photo Finish call out from the side of the walkway, her camera poised to snap more pictures. Where did she hide that thing, anyway? "The burning! The passion! The grace! Show it to the camera!"

I guess I just had to do what I had to do. I struck pose after pose, trying to work whatever I thought would be great. Fingers through my hair, hands behind my head, arms spread wide, whatever I thought looked cool. I guess from the crowd reaction, they thought it looked cool too. I even made a pointing pose and a smile to one of the mares in the crowd just to see her reaction. I think she half-fainted though. Woops.

"More, more, MORE!"

I… really had no idea what to do next. Then suddenly I gripped the neck of my top, pulling it over my head. I heard several gasps in the crowd—and on the stage—when they saw me bare my body to the crowd. I think I heard Photo Finish drop her camera too. But I didn't think it would bother them that much to see me naked considering that… well they're ponies; they always walk around naked. But over the music I could hear some of them commenting not on my bare body, but how toned it was.

With a smirk I grasped at the sleeves of my top and flipped it over my head before tying them around my waist. I began to flex whatever I could; arms, abs, whatever, just to get the crowd going. Everything was just falling into place, it seemed.

But with all good things, they must come to an end. "Wonderful! Marvelous! Such passion! Such grace! Such… magicks!" Photo Finished seemed to have composed herself before making her way up to me. "You were astounding! I will be publishing these photos in my latest issue! And I would love to see more from your designer!"

"Thank you. I had a—Hurk!" The fashion pony wrapped her forelegs around me and hugged me hard before giving me a smooch on each cheek.

Oh, God. Now I'm getting kisses from these ponies now?

"No, it is I who should be thanking you!"

"Well, if you say so. I should—" I went dead silent. My face went straight. My eyes widened as I gazed across the crowd and saw two faces that I instantly recognized. Who would forget those white and lavender furs and those purple and violet manes. Oh, and the scowling expressions too. That also stands out. "… Ah, smeg."

"Summers!" a shrill voice shrieked out from the crowd. Guess Rarity was still angry at me. "You still owe Fluttershy an apology!"

"And you still owe me a friendship cuddle!" And Twilight too.

"AND YOU OWE US NEW WINDOWS!"

Oh yeah. They're super mad. That's my cue to make a run for it. I leapt from the edge of the catwalk, making the ponies below me scurry out of the way and leaving me a path to tumble through, rolling to my feet before making a run for it. From behind I could hear the galloping of hooves as Rarity and Twilight bolted after me in hot pursuit.

People say the running of the bulls is terrifying, but I think the running of the two angry magic-wielding ponies is heart attack-inducing.

"Get back here!" Twilight called out to me. "You can't run forever!"

I'm more than happy enough to try and prove them wrong.

Chapter 20 - A Baker's Dozen

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To be quite honest, they were right. I wasn't going to be able to run away forever, especially trying to run away from ponies. I mean, come on, they can run for ages! God knows how much stamina they have when compared to a human, but at least I was physically fit to sprint for some time. Except I'd been doing it all day yesterday. My legs were burning, my feet were sore, and all I wanted to do was just sit in a nice warm bath and soak.

But nope, that wasn't gonna happen. Every time I thought I was getting further and further away from them I could hear the heavy clopping of galloping hooves constantly behind me, never fading. In fact I could hear them getting closer from time to time, picking up pace and catching up to me on the straights. The only thing that kept them from catching me was me being able to turn corners a lot better than they could.

Through the streets and past the houses I ran, dodging into alleyways and vaulting waist-high barriers and fences whenever I had to. Over one of them the torso of my waist-bound top got caught on the tops of the wooden planks, with the time taken to unhinge it just letting Twilight and Rarity close the gap on me.

I had run out of alleyways to duck into. I was now in, what I would guess to be, the shopping district for lack of a better term for it. Supply stores, candy shops, market stalls set up along the sidewalks… It was just a huge open area with nowhere to hide. Unless in this place the shop owners didn't mind me diving over their counters like I was Captain America.

"We've got you now, Summers," cried out Rarity from behind me, her voice echoing through the district. Some of the shopkeepers and stall-runners turned their gaze to us. "Now if you'll just come with us quietly, we'll make things a lot less difficult for you. Okay?" Her voice was calm, collected, even a little sultry. But her stone cold glare and orcish-like furrowed brow betrayed her disguised tone for something more sinister.

And I definitely wasn't going to be the outlet for it.

Every step I took was starting to slow me down. Fatigue was setting in, and muscles were starting to cramp all over. My lungs became heavy, and every breath became a wheeze. My chest felt like someone was pressing both hands down on it, aching with every inhale. I had no choice but to cause… distractions.

The deeper into the avenue I was chased, I began to see more and more stalls, entering into some sort of market. As much as I hated to do it, I did whatever I could to slow the two wrathful ponies that were getting so much closer to my heels. Knocked over standing signs, tossed baskets of fruit, scattered chains of jewellery, even tossed stuffed plushies of weird yet whimsical creatures that I would only see in some cutesy version of a Monster Manual. For the most part it worked, despite the cries and protests and of all of the owners of the merchandise I had no doubt made unsellable. One of them even called me a "rapscallion". I hadn't heard that word used in a while. It didn't help that I ended up getting smushed bananas on the soles of my shoes. Cleaning that stuff off was gonna be a real pain.

But despite what I did, they always ended up catching up to speed. In fact, the only thing I really did was make them even more angry. Even more determined. Even more loud as they slung casual obscenities at me from several meters behind me for everyone to hear. I couldn't help but take particular offense to Rarity called me an "uncouth vandalising slug". Though to be fair, I only took offense to the 'slug' part.

I was starting to reach the end of the market, with only a couple of market stalls left to either side. Ahead was an open expanse, like a town square. From there, I had nowhere to duck, nowhere to hide, nowhere to run, and I didn't really fancy throwing other ponies in my way—I was already in deep enough trouble as it was.

I glanced around, trying to find anything of use. Then it hit me like a freight train. The back of the awnings on the market stalls were not fastened, but rather just stretched out like a bed sheet, held on the front in a similar manner from thin, bamboo-like poles. I began to slow down as I reached the last two stalls.

I had a cunning plan. Which probably wasn't actually that cunning, in hindsight.

"We've got you now!" cried Twilight, her breath heavy and rugged.

"Accept your fate, Summers!" followed Rarity, her eyes ablaze with tenacity. Her choice of words didn't make her sentiments any the sweeter either.

I waited for them to get a little closer, as close as I dared allowed them. I sprung my plan into action. Outstretching my right arm, and grasped one of the poles holding the awning up, and yanked it from the top of the stall, flinging it like a flag down onto the two of them. The edges of the cloth tangled their legs and made them trip up as it covered them, making them tumble into a ball of fur and pastel colours. I swung around and grabbed the pole from the opposite awning, and flung that down on top of them too, giving them an extra layer for them to fight through.

With that done, I ran out from the district and into the square beyond. All around were ponies minding their own business, though a select few stopped to gawk at me and my dirt-covered clothing. I hadn't the time to give them any attention when I was already running for my life from it. I scanned around the place, looking for somewhere to go. I didn't see it before, but I noticed a large building just down the way—taller than the other houses, decorated like a giant birthday cake. With the time that I bought myself, I made it there with quick haste.

Sugarcube Corner, the hanging sign read. Looked like a bakery. I could lose them here.

I burst through the door, though thankfully, as much as it looked like a six foot wafer, it wasn't as thin as one. A bell above me jingled to signal the entrance of a new customer, though the banging of wood against plaster gave ample enough signal that I had just barged in like I owned the place.

A cry came from a pony behind the counter as they sharply turned, holding a pie tin in her hooves. Thankfully she didn't drop it. A light blue pony with dual shades of pink hair and tail swirled like tipped icing on a cake. I had to remind myself that it wasn't real icing as I amused the thought of nibbling on it just to see if it tasted like strawberry. Dehydration and exhaustion can do that to you.

She stared at me, eyes wide and mouth open in shock. Not surprising considering a near six-foot bipedal shaved monkey just stumbled in like he was escaping a zombie apocalypse. But after a moment, she just placed the pie tin on the counter and smiled, her expression softening as though she was greeting one of her regulars. Professionalism at its finest.

"Hello there!" she greeted with a great amount of cheer. "What can I do ya for"—I ran at the counter as she spoke, vaulting over the top of it and hiding behind the wooden back of it, curling into a seated prone position with my upper back against the panel. I had accidentally knocked over the tin too, splattering cherry pie across the tiles—"H-hey! What do ya think you're doing? And you ruined my pie!"

Before I could even say sorry, the bell tolled. The door swung open almost with as much force as I did.

"Sorry to disturbed you, Mrs. Cake," a voice called out. Girly, calm, sweet… rugged. I recognized that voice anywhere, but how did she know where I went? As I stared across the floor in front of me, I noticed pale yellow gunk lining the edges of my shoes. Darn it, I must had left a trail of smushed bananas all the way here!

"Have you seen someone come by here?" another voice asked. Rarity was with her too, her tone as sweet as a nut. If only they were always like that.

"Tall. Skinny. Looks like a shaved monkey." Hey, come on, I made that joke first.

"Dirty, unfashionable clothes." They're only dirty because you keep chasing me!

"Hair that looks like a dried up two month old mop." Now that's just rude.

She gazed at me from the corner of her eye. "Um, I—" I shook my head, and held a finger up to my nose. There was a pause before she looked back at the two across from her with an awkward smile "—Nope! Sorry, girls, I haven't seen anything like that! Nope, not at all!" She gave a nervous chuckle. How convincing.

Twilight sighed. "Okay. Sorry to disturb you, Mrs. Cake."

"If you do see him, could you tell Pinkie Pie and have her let us know?" added Rarity. She was so vigilant, even Batman would be jealous.

"I will do, girls. You have a good day now!"

Tapping hooves against the ceramic tiles thudded quieter and quieter. The swinging of door hinges sounded against the ringing of the bell, before ending with a click of the door latch. They were gone for now.

Breathing a sigh of relief, the back of my head knocked against the wooden panel as it reclined. I turned to look back up at her, to thank her. But I was met with a deathly glare that made me speechless.

"You've got some explaining to do, mister," she spoke down at me like I was a kid with his hand caught in the cookie jar. Or the pastry dish, in this case. "And what're you gonna do about my pie you ruined?"

I gave a single, awkward chuckle. This was gonna take some time.


A dash of flour scored the wooden counter near the oven before Mrs. Cake plopped the ball of dough down. She turned her head to me, a wooden rolling pin clenched between teeth for me to take. My hand wrapped around the shaped handle of it, and I couldn't help but examine it first. No drool on it, but it had to be unhygienic to use this.

"Just roll out the dough as much as you can, about a couple of millimetres thick," she instructed, as I obeyed. I pressed the rolling pin down hard on the dough, and rolled it forward. The dough clung on and wrapped itself around the tool, only getting worse as I rolled it back. I heard an impatient sigh from behind me. "No, no, no. Press gently," she spoke as she placed her hooves on the dough, unwrapping it from the pin, "and work the dough gently until it becomes flat. Like this…" She moved her hooves onto the top of my hands. Soft and furry, almost like a cat's paws. She eased up on the pressure that I was applying to the dough, and began to move my hands up and down as a slower, weaker pace. I let her take control for the moment, until she removed her hooves from me. "Now, you try it."

I couldn't help but let out a subtle groan as I worked the dough. "I wasn't any good at baking," I said, as painful as it was for me to admit it despite my enjoyment of cooking, but perhaps she would ease up on me. "Failed it at school. Got me an 'E' grade by the end of it."

"It's all about practice. If you keep doing it, you'll get better. But… I guess you don't have a baking cutie mark, do you?"

"I don't have one at all. Humans don't tend to get magical marks on their butts when they find the thing they're good at."

"Is that so?" She laughed as she watched me work. "That's better," she noted on my rolling skills. "So then… what's your special talent?"

Silence filled the room as I thought on it. My mind wandered, but my arms kept moving on their own as they stretched out the dough more and more. "I dunno. Humans are a bit more complicated than that. Some people have more than one special talent. Some can go their entire lives without even knowing it."

"And you?"

My arms stopped. My hands lifted the rolling pin and set it aside. "Still searching. I'm good at a fair few things. I can code. I can play the guitar. I can draw. I can write. I can fight. But I don't particularly have the passion for any of those." It was a lot to think about, overwhelmingly so. I didn't expect my conversation with a pony to be as deep as it was. "I think for someone to have a special talent, they need to have a passion for it, even if they start off bad, even terrible at it. You said it's all about practice, right? I've always thought of practice as the platform, and passion the fuel that drives it. Passion drives the platform to one's dreams."

Mrs. Cake smiled at me all the while. "I think you've hit the nail on the head, Summers," she responded. I gave a half smile at that. "What is your dream?"

My hands slowly, carefully slid under the flattered sheet of dough before lifting it from the worktop. "I'm not sure," I replied, blunt and deadpan. I placed the dough in the nearby pie tin, making sure the bottom sat flush and tucking the edges around the inside. "I've never really thought about it. I kinda just went through life day by day just… living. Making sure me and my family had what we needed. Just making sure we had food on the table and a roof over our heads."

"Surely there must be something you want to work towards?" she asked as she stirred the simmering cherry jam on the stove. "You said you're studying this… 'coding' at college, right? There must be a reason why you're doing it."

"I wanna be a game designer. I wanted to be able to put my mind into something people can play, something people can enjoy. But then I ask myself… Why? Perhaps when I find my dream, I'll be able to answer that question."

"Maybe you'll find it sooner than you think. I know you'll find it. Just keep looking forward!"

A hummed with a smile as my fingers patted against the sides of the pastry, forming it against the notched sides of the tin. "Thanks, mom."

Did I just say that?

I stopped. Slowly I turned and gazed at Mrs. Cake. She did the same thing, our eyes locked. Time felt like it was slowing down as the silence mingled with tension. A sudden pop from the pot broke it, thankfully.

"O-Oh! Looks like the jam is ready," the pony spoke to break the pause. "Just gotta… let it sit to cool down now…"

I cleared my throat as I stood up straight, turning away from her. A nervous tick moved my hand to the back of my head to scratch it. "S-sorry about that. It's just that… mom always says to keep looking forward." I looked over my shoulder back at her. She was smiling a motherly smile. I reciprocated the notion. "You kinda remind me of her. She was a good baker too."

She giggled, and smirked at me. "Well, we know you didn't get that from your mom, then!" Ooh, now she's throwing shade as well as flour. But I couldn't help but snicker. "I guess while you're here, you can… stay for a few nights."

I felt my heart thump heavily in my chest for a single beat. I turned to her, opening my mouth to speak. All I made for a choking noise before I managed to get the words out. "But… Mrs. Cake, I couldn't… I couldn't possibly intrude on you like this."

"Where else have you got to go? We can't have you sleeping under a tree all the time, can we? Besides, Rarity and Twilight will still be out looking for you, or did you forget that?"

Truthfully, I did. Making this pie took my mind off of it. Took my mind off of a lot of things. "Yeah, you got a point. But… where am I gonna stay?"

"Upstairs, of course! We've got a few bedrooms upstairs. I won't even charge you rent."

"No, that's too much, Mrs. Cake. I have to pay you back somehow."

She hummed, her eyes shifting up to the ceiling. "I tell you what. Let's make a deal. You stay with us for free, and you'll work in the kitchen for no pay—"

"I, uh… I guess I could do that."

"I haven't finished! You'll work for no pay—but, your pay will go towards fixing those windows you broke. And you'd better bet I'm gonna work your flank off!"

"Ah, there's the catch! But I'll do it. I've gotta set things right, haven't I?"

"You're darn right you do." Hooves tapped on the floor as she walked towards me. Without warning, without a pause, she wrapped her forelegs around me and held me close. "Welcome to your new home, Summers."

My arms shook. The feeling was strange, yet familiar. I hadn't felt something like this since I was a toddler. I wrapped my arms under hers, and over her withers. "Thanks… 'mom'."

"You're gonna be calling me that now, aren't ya?"

"Probably. I haven't decided yet." But something clicked in my mind. I pulled away, and looked straight at her. "Wait… you said "us", right? Who else lives here?"

"Well there's me and my husband, our little ones, and—"

"Mrs. Cake! I'm back!"

That voice. I would recognize that voice anywhere. High, squeaky, filled with energy like a sugar overload.

Pinkie Pie pranced in, looking overly cheerful as was usual. Baskets of ingredients hung from either side of a harness that was fastened on her back. Her big, wide, cyan eyes gazed at me past that overhanging lock of hot-pink hair. "Summers!? What're you doing here?" But then her eyes narrowed. Her nostrils flared. I could see a literal flame burning in those pupils of hers. "You didn't come back last night! YOU BROKE OUR PINKIE PROMISE!"

I flinched and back up against the counter. Then I side stepped behind Mrs. Cake.

"Mom! Help me!"