Maple Syrup

by Garbo

First published

Assorted sap that never got turned into Grade-A Vermont Maple Syrup.

This is a collection of stories that didn't merit individual publication, were not completed, or are not posted on my user for some other reason. These blobs of sap may not be a replacement for the real thing, but perhaps some of you will see Grade-A Syrup where I don't.

The Waiting Game

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As Thunderlane woke up, he used his hoof to shield himself from the sunlight that always assaulted his eyes in the morning. At least, the sunlight was usually there, but this time there wasn’t the usual infernal brightness. After giving himself a few moments to find his bearings, the half-awake pegasus lowered his hoof and found out why his eyes hadn’t been burned out of their sockets: The shade was down.

Thunderlane found this odd. Ditzy normally left the shade open each night, saying that she liked waking up to the sunlight. No matter how much the he protested, she never gave in. In the end, he would always agree, knowing what would happen - or more to the point what wouldn’t happen - if they got into a fight. Like any other stallion, Thunderlane liked it better when his marefriend was willing to share the bed and in the mood for certain bed-related activities.

Thunderlane had tried to solve it on his own end as well, but no matter how much he tried, he always woke up facing the window. He’d slept on his left side his entire life before moving in with Ditzy; he just found it more comfortable that way. As much as it annoyed him, he knew it was worth putting up with. It was also worth living in a ground house, despite having lived in cloud homes all his life. Hearing a quiet murmur from behind him, Thunderlane was once again reminded why it was worth all those little annoyances.

Quietly, the black-coated stallion shifted himself away from the window, turning his body as carefully as possible. It took him awhile, but when he was done, he was glad his eyes hadn’t been burned out. To him, there was nothing more beautiful than Ditzy’s face when she was asleep. Her eyelids were just barely closed, and her peaceful expression was enough to make his heart melt. During the day, she was often stressed about her job as a mailmare, but right now, none of that showed. She was content in her dream world, the only place where life’s hardships could never reach her.

It was this that made Ditzy different than the various other mares Thunderlane had been in relationships with. He still couldn’t get enough of her, even after a whole year of being together, while his other relationships had lasted a month at most. He’d never seen himself as the kind of stallion to settle down, and yet here he was, and he loved it. No amount of beautiful mares in the world could ever strike his heart as this one had.

The stallion gave himself another few seconds to gaze upon Ditzy’s form before deciding to coax her awake. Nuzzling her gently, Thunderlane heard her breaths get increasingly shallow as she started to wake, and felt her shift a little under the sheets.

Smiling, Thunderlane kissed her gently until he got a response. When he pulled away, he was met with the sight of Ditzy smiling, and even though her eyes were still closed, it was clear she was awake.

“So,” Thunderlane said, putting on his best ‘smexy’ face, “how was that for a romantic wake-up?”

“Pretty good,” said Ditzy, sighing contentedly.

“Are you gonna open your eyes, or what?” Thunderlane asked, chuckling.

Ditzy gave him a playful shove with one hoof, opening her eyes. “I was getting to that!” The mare said, sliding her way into Thunderlane’s embrace. “You just didn’t give me the time.”

“Fair enough,” he said, staring into his marefriend’s eyes longingly. Ditzy did the same, stretching out the silent spell. Both could hear the light chirping of birds from outside, which was something Thunderlane never heard in his cloud home. It was a pretty romantic moment, so naturally, the stallion in the room said just about the most non-romantic thing possible.

“So ... you want to fool around?”

The mailmare shook her head. “We already did that last night, remember?”

Suddenly, it all made sense to the forgetful stallion. “So that’s why the shades were down!”

“Well duh. I don’t think we would want Pinkie seeing what was going on, would we?”

“Yeah, I guess you’re right,” he replied, stretching a little. The pink mare’s bedroom window was right across from theirs, since Ditzy happened to live right next to sugarcube corner. Whether it was coincidence or not that she lived next to the primary source of muffins in the town was anypony’s guess..

“Can’t you remember last night?” Ditzy asked, bringing her coltfriend’s attention back to her.

Thunderlane shook his head. “You know how I am in the morning; I need to actually wake up to remember anything.”

Ditzy nodded, remembering that the same scenario had played out a dozen times or so, but didn’t say anything, allowing her bedmate to continue.

“Besides, I’m pretty sure I know how it went down.”

“Well how, then?”

“Well,” he said, shifting himself just a little closer to the mailmare, “we were probably lying on the bed …”

“Uh-huh.”

“And I guess I was holding you like this,” he said, resting his hooves just above her bubble cutie marks.

Starting to catch on, Ditzy smiled. “Keep going …”

“Well, I guess I was on top too,” he continued, matching his words with his actions.

Despite her former protest, the mare wasn’t resisting in the least. “Yeah, probably.”

“And then, I went and kissed you … just … like … this.” Unlike the last one, the kiss that followed quickly grew more heated, and the narrator, who was afraid a foal might someday come across this story, decided to take a step outside before things got too involved. After all, in a land like Equestria, there was plenty of other things to look at. It wasn’t an extraordinary day, and the narrator wondered why the author hadn’t picked a perfectly sunny day like all the other authors seemed to do. After mulling it over for a while, his best guess was that the writer was just trying to be different. And as it turned out, that was a pretty good guess, although a good part of it was probably the result of the author being dumb.

Anyways, it was still a pretty decent day. The sunset had ended in the last hour or so, but it was still too early for ponies to be out and about. Some birds were chirping as he’d said before, and for lack of anything else to do, The Narrator decided to think about that. After all, he’d always wondered why the birds - who were perfectly capable of flying south by themselves - needed the help of ponies to go North. Couldn’t they just retrace their path?

=-=-=-=-=

So the narrator spend the next ten minutes thinking about birds. While pondering the differences between Zebafrican and Unipean swallows, he broke his train of thought, realizing that he’d been gone long enough for things to have cooled down. Nervously, he peeked back through the window. He was only able to see through the thin crack under the windowshade. Thankfully for him, the two ponies seemed to be done bucking, mating, consummating, banging, making love, or whatever you want to call it. Deciding to get in there before the story got too derailed, the narrator squeezed under the crack in the window and into the room.

Meanwhile, the two lovers were lying in the bed, basking in the afterglow. Unknown to most ponies, afterglow is actually a type of magic. In fact, Twilight Sparkle had done a very conclusive study on it recently.

But that’s a story for another time.

Thunderlane and Ditzy Doo were slightly winded, both from the activity that had just taken place and from how early it was. Relaxing in Thunderlane’s embrace, it took Ditzy a while to remember the reason she had to wake up this early every morning. But when she did …

“Thunderlane!!”

The stallion winced at the sudden volume of his marefriend’s voice. “What?”

“I’m going to be late for work!”

“Yeah, sure you are,” he said dismissively, holding her just a little tighter.

Angrily, Ditzy glared at Thunderlane until he caved, letting her go. “Okay, fine, I’ll help you get ready.”

=-=-=-=-=

Five minutes later, Ditzy Doo had showered, brushed her coat and mane, and was pretty well woken up. She was now eating a quick breakfast of oats and coffee while Thunderlane preened her feathers for her.

“I wish I could actually take the time to do this right,” the stallion mumbled through the feathers.

Ditzy sensed the innuendo, but didn’t take the time to laugh.

“I think we’ve had enough of that for one day, don’t you?” Finishing her food and chugging the rest of her coffee, the mare stood up just as Thunderlane finished preening the last of feathers.

“So, you’ll be there for our date, right?”

“Of course I will,” the mare said, hurriedly dumping the bowl and mug into the sink. She winced when she heard one of them shatter, but didn’t have time to inspect the damage. Trotting over to the bewildered stallion in the room, she gave him a farewell kiss.

“The preening was relaxing, though. Thanks.”

Before Thunderlane had a chance to respond, she rushed over to her saddlebags, flung them on crookedly, then flew out the door. A few seconds later, Thunderlane heard a dull thud as Ditzy flew into the ground, followed by a string of muffled curses as she fixed the strap that she’d accidentally fastened over her wing.

Sighing, the dark-coated pegasus peered through the window, watching her fly off as fast as she could manage.

“Yeah, relaxed,” he mumbled. If that was her being relaxed, then he was glad he wouldn’t have to see her at work that day. Hopefully by the time their date rolled around, she would be a little more relaxed. Although he didn’t remember this early in the morning, he’d made big plans for their date - relationship-altering ones - and Ditzy being upset wouldn’t help things

=-=-=-=-=

Thunderlane went through the rest of the day, but he didn’t really pay much attention to anything. He wasn’t so zoned out that he started crashing into buildings as he flew along, but he did have to swerve at the last minute to avoid hitting them more than a few times. He hadn’t been able to stop thinking about the date since remembering it earlier that morning. It was a thought that made him both overjoyed and terrified at the same time.

He’d first remembered just after Ditzy had left. Since he knew he wasn’t going to get back to sleep, he took a quick shower to get rid of the last vestiges of sleepiness rocking the bed hadn’t taken care of. Minutes later, he’d found himself eating breakfast; mind clear. And that’s when he’d remembered the doozy: He was going to ask Ditzy to marry him.

Understandably, he was fixated on the task ahead, and only going through the motions of his routine. He was so out of it that he didn’t realize he was at Sugarcube Corner until he heard a familiar, cheerful voice from behind the counter.

“Hey Thunder! What’s shakin’?”

Of course, it was none other than Pinkie Pie, Ponyville’s #1 party mare. Upon entering the establishment, Thunderlane was nearly always greeted by the energetic mare. Even when she was upstairs watching over the Cake babies or in the kitchen baking, she somehow knew that Thunderlane was there. It didn’t make any sense, but it didn’t really matter to him. Pinkie was a good friend, and it was always nice to talk to her.

“Heh, hey Pinkie.” Still not paying much attention to his surroundings, Thunderlane stumbled over a barstool as he walked up to the counter, barely managing to catch his balance.

Pinkie laughed loudly, snorting like a pig, a sound that seemed somewhat appropriate given her color. “You’re acting silly today, Thunder! Can I get you anything? And where’s Ditzy? Is she not out of work yet? How long until she gets here? Oh my gosh I can’t wait until she gets here!”

Thunderlane ran through the questions in his head before responding. “Uh, I don’t need anything until Ditzy gets here. And no, she’s not out of work yet, but she’ll be here soon.”

“Oh, okay. So what did you want to talk about?”

“Pinkie, you called out to me, remember? I never asked for anypony to talk to.”

“I know, but I can just tell there’s something you want to talk about. I mean, you look pretty happy about something, but you’re kind of nervous too. There must be something that’s making you act like this.”

Thunderlane grinned at the comment. Pinkie was always a good pony to talk to when he was unsure about something. Her energetic personality had often lifted him out of a sour mood.

“Well yeah, there is.”

“What is it? I promise I won’t tell! Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a-”

Putting a hoof on her mouth to silence her, Thunderlane continued. “I know you won’t tell, Pinkie. But can you please be quiet about this. I haven’t told anypony else yet.”

“Ooooooh, it’s a secret,” Pinkie said, doing her best to whisper from behind Thunderlane’s hoof , “I’m good with secrets. You can trust me.”

“I know that, Pinkie. I just wanted to tell you since you’ve always been a really great friend to me and Ditzy, and-”

“Oh, it’s about you and Ditzy? What is it? Oh, oh, I bet I know! She’s pregnant, isn’t she? You’re happy ‘cause you’re gonna get a little foal and that’s enough to make anypony happy, really. Do you know what you’re going to name her? or him. or her. You wouldn’t be able to tell this early on would you?” By the end of this, Pinkie’s voice had risen well above a whisper, and the whole restaurant turned towards them after hearing the word ‘pregnant’, and probably some ponies off the street too.

For the first time in the last few hours, Thunderlane frowned. “No, Pinkie, she’s not pregnant. Can you please keep it down!”

Pinkie covered her mouth with her hooves, “Oh, right, I’m supposed to be whispering. Sorry!”

“It’s okay,” Thunderlane replied, a little bit of his earlier grin returning.

“I guess I was just making assumptions. I mean, I know you two have been bucking, but-”

“Wait, what?” Thunderlane interjected, his eyes wide in shock.

“You didn’t think I could figure it out, Thunder? We’re next door neighbors and best friends. Of course I know.”

Thunderlane took a while to recover. Having one of your best friends tell you that she’s keenly aware that you’re sleeping with another one of her best friends tends to be quite a shocker.

“Wait, so how did you know? Did you guess?”

“Well, I did at first. I mean, you’d been going out more months, and you’d been sleeping in the same bed for a lot of that time. I knew it must’ve happened sometime.”

“Wait, at first you guessed?”

“Well, actually, it was this morning when I figured it out for sure. The twins woke me up early, so I was already awake. The window was open, and I heard you.” Pinkie said this easily, as if she was just talking about the weather instead of that fact that two of her friends were having sex. That smoothness wasn’t helping Thunderlane’s nervousness. He couldn’t remember feeling more awkward since flight school health class.

“Was it really that loud?”

“Not too loud, but it’s not like it matters. Nopony’s up that early anyway.”

Thunderlane wasn’t normally one to blush, but considering the circumstances, it wasn’t a surprise. “Yeah, I know. Still, I guess we could’ve been more careful. The weird thing is, I don’t remember either of us opening the window.”

“You’re right, you didn’t.”

Now he was even more confused. “Um, Pinkie, one of us had to. It wasn’t open when I woke up.”

“No, see there was this ghostie.”

“A ghostie,” said Thunderlane with an unreadable expression.

“Uh huh. He came from inside your room. He opened up the window and went outside. He was kinda floaty … and clear … and, well, a ghostie!”

“Pinkie, how long were you watching our window?” he asked suspiciously.

“Oh, I wasn’t really. The ghostie was the first thing I noticed. I saw it out of my … uh … oh, what’s the word?”

“Peripheral vision?” He guessed.

“Yeah, that one!”

“Oh, okay.” Knowing that his good friend wasn’t a stalker put him at ease. With any of his other friends, he wouldn’t have questioned them for a minute. But despite how well he knew Pinkie Pie, there were times she could be the littlest bit crazy, and he couldn’t put that sort of thing past her, no matter how much he trusted her.

“So anyway, the ghostie just sat there, so that got boring. I was just sitting there thinking, and then I wondered, why would he ever leave your room? I mean, you two are so super-fantastically fun to hang around, I don’t see how anypony - or anyghostie, I guess - wouldn’t want to stay. And that’s when I heard … well, you know.”

Thunderlane’s cheeks felt hot again, accompanied by the appropriate color. “Uh, yeah, I get the picture. So you think you saw a ghost going out the window?”

“Yep! He was a really nice guy too. After he came out the second time, we talked a bit. He was kind of surprised I could see him though. He called himself The Narrator. Isn’t that a funny name?”

Thunderlane just chuckled, knowing there was no way that story was true. He figured the mare had just got it mixed up with a dream she’d had the night before. Having to wake up before sunrise could do that sort of thing to a pony. If it could make him forget a night of fun with Ditzy, he figured it could mix up reality and fiction.

Fortunately for Thunderlane, he would never find out how wrong he was, as Pinkie suddenly refocused their derailed conversation.

“So if you’re not getting a foal right now, when are you? Just wondering! I mean, you don’t have to tell me if you don’t want.”

Remembering why he and his friend were talking, Thunderlane thought up his response accordingly.

“Well, I think we were waiting until after the wedding.”

“Well that doesn’t help, Thunder. How am I supposed to know when you two are getting married?” Pinkie Pie asked, not taking the hint.

He stared at her for a few seconds, just smiling, seeing how long it would take the hyperactive earth pony to put the pieces together. When she finally did, she gasped loudly, nearly inhaling all of the air in Sugarcube Corner. She was about to shout, but the stallion put a silencing hoof to her mouth before she could inform half of the town about his matrimonial plans.

“Pinkie, can you promise me you’ll be quiet this time? I really don’t want everypony knowing about this.” The pink-colored earth pony nodded energetically, and he released his hoof.

“So you and Ditzy are engaged? Oh my gosh this is so exciting! This calls for a party!”

“You mean the reception?” Thunderlane deadpanned.

“Well, yeah, of course that. But I mean it’s such a big thing, I figure it deserves two parties! don’t you? And will you please please please let me plan the reception? That would be so much fun! I mean Cadence and Shining Armor’s was good enough, but you two? Oh my gosh, that would be so super-duper terrific!”

“Well I can’t say yes just yet Pinkie.”

“Why not, Thunder? Is there somepony else you want to do the reception? I guess that’s fine with me, even though I really, really, really want to do it.”

“No, it’s not that. It’s just that, well, I haven’t asked her yet.”

Pinkie’s eyes widened. “Wait, so you’re saying you’re going to-”

“Propose here. Yeah.”

“Oh my gosh, that makes so much sense! I mean, this is where you guys first met, and you go out here all the time, and Ditzy loves muffins. Oh, do you want me to hide the ring in a muffin? That would be so romantic,” Pinkie was hugging Thunderlane at this point, nearly choking him, as most of her hugs had a way of doing.

“Um, Pinkie, do you think you could turn down the energy just a little bit?”

“Oh, sorry about that,” she said, letting him go. “I’m just so excited!”

“Yeah … I am too,” whispered Thunderlane with more than a hint of fear in his tone.

Pinkie noticed his hesitation. “You’re nervous, aren’t you?”

Thunderlane nodded, although he thought ‘panicked’ would be a more accurate word. Or maybe ‘frightened for my life’.

“Well of course you are! It’s a big deal; I’d be worried if you weren’t nervous.”

“Yeah, I guess you’re right. But what if she says no? I mean, I doubt she’d dump me, but I don’t know what would happen if she didn’t want to. I’m afraid it won’t be the same.”

Pinkie just shook her head. “What are you talking about? You two are perfect for each other, and there isn’t anything that can just tear you apart, especially this. You know that.”

“I know, but still. What if she doesn’t want to get married yet?”

“Then you wait till she’s ready! She’s not going to stop loving you just because you propose to her. She’ll probably like that you’re ready to make that kind of commitment to her, even if she doesn’t want to yet. Trust me, I’m a mare too, you know, and that’s what I would think.”

Thunderlane wasn’t used to hearing that kind of thing out of the sometimes-immature mare, but he couldn’t deny the truth of it.

“You know what Pinkie? I guess you’re right.”

“Right about what?” asked a voice from behind him.

Recognizing the voice, Thunderlane went rigid in fear. He’d forgotten the reason he’d come to Sugarcube Corner in the first place: to go on a date with his marefriend, who had just shown up at an inopportune moment. With nothing but stuttering coming out of his mouth, he was lucky to have a certain pink-maned heroine there to save him from certain doom.

“We were talking about his mane. He said he’s thinking about styling it normally for once.”

Thunderlane had no choice but to play along. “Well, yeah, It’s … uh … kind of getting a little boring, since I’ve been doing it for so long.”

Ditzy looked surprised. “Really? I though you always liked the Zebafrican style.”

“Well you know, I’m probably not going to, but, y’know, it might be something to try sometime,” said Thunderlane, who was staring daggers into Pinkie Pie. She had left the counter and was busying herself by stacking up some dishes to be cleaned later. Even though she was turned away from him, Thunderlane could tell she was having trouble containing her laughter. He knew a prank when he saw one.

“Oh, okay. So, are we going to sit down or what?”

“Sure,” he said, gritting his teeth. “Let’s go.”

As the two walked over to one of the booths, Thunderlane saw Pinkie fall over in a fit of laughter. The mare knew well enough that Ditzy would bother him about it for a good part of the date. It wasn’t really Ditzy’s fault, though. She was just being curious.

And of course, after they sat down, that was the first thing they talked about. It went on for a good fifteen minutes, maybe more. It seemed to last forever for the stallion at the table. He liked his mane the way it was; he didn’t care if everypony else seemed to think it was odd. But he also knew that he had to keep up the act so Ditzy wouldn’t think anything was amiss. Thus, the conversation continued until Thunderlane got up to get some food.

“Pinkie, can we get two daisy sandwiches and a tray of muffins?”

“Sure thing!”

It only took her a minute to get the food, since the sandwiches didn’t require cooking and the muffins had already been made. Thunderlane’s eyes followed Pinkie around as she got the ingredients for the sandwiches. When she was done, she came over and brought him the food. balancing the tray on his back, he turned to the mare at the counter.

“Pinkie, you do realize I’m going to get you back, right?”

“Yesserie!”

“Okay, good, just making sure, we’ll talk after I’m engaged.” he said, giving her a wink.

Pinkie Pie just smiled, going into the back room of the restaurant. Meanwhile, Thunderlane brought the food back to the table. Looking up, he saw Ditzy waving him over. He looked over at her and smiled; she had a way of making him do that.

Thunderlane really should’ve been watching where he was going, though. He nearly missed seeing the stallion who was walking to the same place he was. Eyes widening, the normally athletic pegasus . Tripping over the pony’s hind legs, Thunderlane somehow managed to grab the food in between his wings before falling face first into the floor. Ditzy rushed over to him immediately, and once she was sure he was okay, had trouble containing her laughter.

“Hey sweetie, are you okay?”

“Yeah, I think so. How’s the food?”

“Fine.”

“How’s my dignity?” he asked with a forced smile.

That just about did it for Ditzy, who started laughing openly.

“Not so good.”

=-=-=-=-=

An hour later, they still couldn’t stop talking about it.

“Were you really not paying attention, or were you just trying to make me laugh?” Ditzy, who was now sitting on the same side of the booth as her coltfriend, finished off the last of the muffins.

“It wasn’t a set-up, I swear!” Thunderlane was already done his meal, since he’d let Ditzy eat all the muffins.

The mailmare barely managed to hold the muffin in her mouth over the laughs. “And afterward, all he could worry about was whether or not you were going to sue him!”

“Yeah, is Davenport always like that?”

“Uh-huh. I have to deliver stuff to him all the time. The whole time, he can’t stop asking me to be careful just so I don’t hurt my back or wing or somehting. It’s the funniest thing I’ve ever seen!”

Thunderlane couldn’t stop laughing either. “Sounds like it.”

Chuckling, Ditzy wrapped him in a warm embrace. Hugging her back, he looked around the restaurant, realizing that he and Ditzy were the only two ponies there. Pinkie had even put up a closed sign for them, although the restaurant didn’t close for at least another hour. If there was any time to just get it over with, it would be now. Ditzy was happy; they were both happy. That didn’t make him any less nervous, though. He took a deep breath, trying to calm himself down a little. It didn’t help much, but Thunderlane already knew that nothing was going to help in that regard. He was just stalling.

“Hey, Ditzy?”

“Mmhm?” she said, mumbling into his coat.

“I just wanted to ask you something.”

“What kind of something?” she asked.

“Well … it’s kind of, uh, important.”

Ditzy stirred a little before releasing him from the cuddling. “Okay, what is it?”

Saying nothing, Thunderlane got up. He opened up his saddlebags and got the box out. Taking another deep breath, he got down on one knee, and held the now-opened box out to the mare he loved, and said: “Ditzy Doo, will you marry me?”

Wide-eyed, Ditzy didn’t look as overjoyed as he’d hoped. “I … uh … I.” Thunderlane waited as his marefriend went through every known way to stutter ever invented. When she finally got around to speaking, her response was even worse.

“Thunderlane … I love you, I really do, but I’m not sure I’m ready for … well, marriage. At least not yet. You understand, right?”

Grimacing, Thunderlane closed the box, putting it on the table. “No, you don’t need to feel bad about it. I’m okay with it. I guess I just wanted you to know that that’s how I feel.”

Thunderlane tried reaching out to hug her again, but Ditzy recoiled. “No, it’s … it’s very sweet.”

“Sweet? I just asked you to marry me! That’s a lot more than sweet!” Stopping himself, he realized he’d been shouting. Knowing it would only make the situation worse, he stopped before he said anything he’d regret.

“I’m just asking why, I guess. If there’s something I need to know, you can tell me.”

“This isn’t the place to talk about this,” the mare said firmly, trotting out of the door. As quickly as he could, Thunderlane gathered up his things and ran after her. On the way out, he shot a glance at Pinkie, who had a concerned look on her face. For a moment, the stallion was tempted to stop and talk to her, because at the moment, he wanted comfort more than anything else. There was no guarantee of comfort if he followed Ditzy, but at the same time he couldn’t just abandon the mare he loved, especially when she seemed distressed.

After his moment’s hesitation, Thunderlane stepped out the door into the darkness of night, thoughts still racing through his head at the speed of sound. But amid the mental chaos, there was one comforting thought - a memory of what Pinkie had said:

What are you talking about? You two are perfect for eachother, and there isn’t anything that can just tear you apart, especially this.

The distressed pegasus recognized this one good thought and grasped at it. The more he thought about it, the more he realized that somehow, everything was going to be alright. Ditzy did love him, and whatever she was worried about, it was something they could overcome together.

So, with some renewed confidence, Thunderlane took the short walk to his marefriend’s place, coming face to face with the front door. Behind it was a mystery, something he wished he didn’t have to face, and yet, something he could not ignore.

Taking a deep breath, he opened the door, and with it, a challenge he would soon have to face.

Life Goes On

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Cloudsdale had the best parties. This was something that Twilight had picked up on over the years. Of course, there were many different types of parties in Equestia. Canterlot had it’s balls, high society events which Twilight honestly enjoyed a good deal of the time. As uptight as the upper crust could be, they were also very intelligent people, and the kind of ponies she had grown up around in her early childhood.

Hoofington had it’s barbeques of hay fries and soy steaks. She’d always liked these great outdoor celebrations. They were boisterous, informal, and always afforded you the opportunity to meet somepony new and discuss anything from hoofball to interspecies politics. The best part of these was that every one of them was different.

But there was just something about Cloudsdale. The music was a big part of it, as the pegasi had always seemed to be the most in touch with music, just as history had seen many unicorn writers and earth pony painters. And it came in many different varieties. There was music from the old techno craze, the even older rock craze, the pop that always seemed to hang around no matter the decade, and the modern genres, which Twilight couldn’t even begin to describe. They were loud, and they were happy as happy could be.

Watching the festivities from a short distance, a certain Canterlot princess was keenly aware of the importance. This celebration marked the centennial of her ascension to the throne; her final destiny; the proudest moment of a life that would last into near infinity. A lot had changed in the 100 years since her transformation. There had been many social changes that had gone on, but despite not being the socially awkward mare she’d once been, the princess had little interest in those. It was the strides in magical research that had been made by her subjects, and she was glad that the field had come so far despite her absence. Equestrian society was on the brink of the realization that all three magics -Unicorn, Pegasus, and Earth – were one and the same. She knew that this realization would make a new unification between the species, a spiritual successor to what had been done in the wake of the first Hearth’s Warming Eve.

As an alicorn, Twilight knew all of these things. But there was a catch – yes, there was always a catch. She remembered some of the first rules she’d been told as a Princess: Allow the ponies to make their own discoveries. That limitation had taken her a while to get used to, and certain revelations in particular were hard to contain. First and foremost was the existence of a realm beyond death, and infinitely many realms beyond that. When she’d been Celestia’s student, she’d asked her teacher how she coped with having so many friends die over time. Taking her attention off of the party, she allowed her mind to wander back to those early days.


Sighing, Twilight turned over the page of her test with a simple spell. She knew this was the last page, that she was almost done. Smiling, she looked up to see her mentor doing the same.

“Yes Twilight, you’re almost done. Just one more chart and we’re done for the day.”

The filly looked out the window. The sun was only halfway up the sky. She would have a whole afternoon off. She turned back to her paper in earnest. The test was a new concept for her, but one she’d studied for the last few weeks. Now, she’d nearly mastered the Magia Mensa system, the systematic graphing of spells invented by Starswirl the Bearded. She looked at the title of the spell, which like most of magical works was in the old tongue.

“Exquisitus Materiae? What does that mean?”

“That’s the first form of the cloning spell,” said Celestia. “I’d assume you know this one as well, correct?”

Twilight thought for just a moment, as a moment was all she needed. Without answering, she picked the quill up in her magical aura, dipped it in the ink, and had the chart drawn within the minute. When she finished, her teacher inspected her work.

“Great job, Twilight. You did all the magical fluxes perfectly … there is a little inaccuracy on the second period of the sine function, but it looks like it was just the slip of a quill anyway. You don’t need to-“

Twilight’s face was as mortified as a young filly’s would get. “Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry I didn’t mean to mess that up!”

The princess sighed, taking her student under her wing. “Twilight, it’s fine. Everypony makes mistakes, and most ponies make a lot more than you do. That was the only mistake you made on the entire test, after all.”

“But that’s not any better,” Twilight whined. “I got all the way to the end – after all that hard work – and then just hoofed it.”

Celestia’s eyes widened at that remark, her eyes taking a somewhat glazed appearance, as if she were remembering something she’d recently forgotten. From the look on her face, the young filly below could tell something was wrong. Not knowing what else to do and wanting to cheer the princess up, Twilight nuzzled her leg, a gesture that would have been considered blasphemy in any other sort of circumstance. The warm contact pulled the tall mare out of her troubling memory, the glazed look falling from her eyes like the fog off of a window on a midwinter sunrise. It was then that Twilight asked the question:

“Princess? Why were you so, uh, distant like that? Was it because I swore? I know I’m not supposed to do that but sometime I just can’t help myself.”

“No Twilight, it wasn’t that.” Keeping her composure as best she could, she walked out of the study and down to the library proper. She turned around to motion for Twilight to follow, only to realize that the filly had kept pace. She walked ahead, and her student followed, the high-pitched beats of her hooves contrasting with the low thumps of Celestia’s. Trying to save face, she did what she always did at the longer events she was forced to go on: she put on a smile. It was something she’d had centuries to practice, an expression that could fool any aristocrat, any diplomat, any noble. But for some reason, it never seemed to work on Twilight Sparkle.

“What’s wrong? I know something’s wrong. Is it super-secret? Can you tell me?”

“Nothing’s wrong, Twilight. Just a bad memory. They happen to the best of us.”

“Like messing up the test?” Asked the filly, grimacing.

“Exactly. Sometimes you do something that you wish you could do again, on the off chance that you might do it right the next time. But part of life is that there are no second chances, my young student. There are some things you just have to forget, lest they take control of your life.”

Twilight took a moment to think about that one. Normally, the great pony was full of life as she taught her the ways of magic. But now, there was a sorrow she could not explain, a sorrow she needed to understand. She didn’t like unsolved questions, and she wasn’t about to let this one go unchecked.

“Then what about all your friends?”

Now it was Celestia’s turn to contemplate. “What about them?”

“Well, this is sort of something I’ve been wondering about. Well, you … you live for a really long time, but everypony else doesn't. And, I mean, everypony likes you, so I know you must have had friends, right? But then they would die, and you’d be all on your own. Can you just forget them too?”

If Twilight had any idea how deeply that question pained her mentor, how much she mulled over it daily, she never would have asked it.

“Twilight, as ruler of Equestria, I have to be ever vigilant of my royal duties. But even I cannot forget those who touched my life and have passed on; nopony can.”

Walking out of the indoor area of the castle, the two walked onto the balcony, the bright sun shining in stark contrast to the conversation at hoof. Walking to the edge, the princess looked over it, not so much looking for anything in particular as just wanting something to stare at. She glanced to her right and saw Twilight there. The filly wasn’t talking, and she wondered if the conversation might be too somber for a foal of her age.

“But how does that feel, having to go through that? I mean, I can’t imagine what I’d do if I never got to see Shining again; my mom and dad too.”

Celestia’s first thought was that her student was starting to sound like a psychiatrist. Inwardly, she chuckled at her joke. It wasn’t that funny, but she needed something to laugh at. She also needed to turn this conversation around before Twilight ended up mentally scarred. “Well, it’s not always … moving on that takes our friends away from us. Sometimes they’re just gone for a short time, although sometimes it can seem like forever. That’s why you have to appreciate the friends you have Twilight. Never forget that. What I teach you may be powerful, but there’s no magic more powerful than the magic of friendship.”

“What would the spell graph for friendship look like?” asked Twilight, genuinely curious.

Celestia laughed at that, turning away from the balcony and back into the castle. “Well, who knows, maybe someday you’ll find out.”


Opening her eyes, Twilight found herself once again back in her own time. Just to make sure, she checked behind herself, and could clearly see the wings which verified her divine right to rule more than any crown. Such simple things - the same as on a bird - gave her so much power.

And yet, they also gave her so much grief. But this was not the time to dwell on that. She'd lost some friends, but they were all decades gone. The wounds were still there, but they were healing. Indirectly, however, the deaths of her friends - not just Spike and the other elements - but the other residents of Ponyville - reminded her that every time she made a friend, she would have to see that friend perish. She'd studied friendship for her whole childhood, only to be forced into a situation where rejecting friendship had as many virtues as seeking it out. It was a cruel, twisted irony to say the least.

Twilight could be an alicorn all she wanted, and although she knew much, she did not know everything. She still couldn't figure out the magica mensa graph for friendship, and she doubted she ever would over the aeons. Smiling, she turned around and headed back into the party, because after all, it was being held in her honor.

That smile stuck well through her conversations with other ponies, well through the toast they made to her, and well through the end of the party, because although she'd lost some friends, life was still well worth living.

And life would never, never stop being interesting.

Fool In The Rain (Rough Draft)

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Fluttershy liked puddles. There was something about those little reflective pools that made her want to smile. Maybe it was how the sunlight peeking through the clouds reflected off of them, or the cool splash when she stepped in one. It wasn’t so much the puddle she liked as the rain. Even more than the puddles, Fluttershy welcomed the rain. She couldn’t explain it, but there was a novelty to letting the cold drops splash against her, like a natural shower.

Fluttershy felt a lone drop fall onto her snout. The drop stayed there for a moment, and Fluttershy could just see it in the corner of her eye. It slowly started to roll down her cheek and fell to the ground. She could see the spot where it landed – one wet spot in an expanse of dirt that had gone for too long without it.

She looked up at the sky. The pegasi weren’t quite done with the storm yet, but stray drops were known to fall ahead of schedule. She felt another drop land on the top of her head. Another rolled down her back. She could see the spots all over now, the ground slowly but surely having its thirst quenched. Soon a steady sheet fell downward, everything around her turning a shade darker with saturation. A songbird darted across her vision, taking sanctuary in a nearby pine tree. The ponies took cover as well.

Across the park, she could see her friends Applejack and Rarity, who had spent a good part of the afternoon getting the park ready for the storm. Or at least, Applejack was getting it ready. Rarity didn’t seem to be doing much of anything. But on the other hoof, Applejack’s way of doing things was equally futile. Why tear down the branches when everypony will be inside anyway? There wouldn’t be anything for them to fall on; even the animals would take cover in a storm like this one.

As the rainfall came harder and harder, the tension between the two mares grew. Even from a distance, she could see the strained look on Applejack’s face and the almost pathetic one on Rarity’s. Then the shouting came, and although she couldn’t hear it over the rain, she could tell it was getting pretty heated, just as the temperature was beginning to drop. She was shivering, but not really noticing all that much. What was a little shivering to enjoy the lovely scenery?

So far, those two had been the funniest of her newfound friends to watch. They constantly bickered, never agreeing on anything. It was almost as if when one of them made a statement, the other came up with the opposite opinion just so they could argue. It was fun to watch, so long as it stayed as harmless as it was. Of course, she wouldn’t ever wish any true problems on any of her friends – or anypony, for that matter – but it was funny. Neither of them really meant any harm, and both of them knew that, deep down.

Fluttershy knew all this, but she wouldn’t tell either of them about it. She’d always considered herself a good judge of character, but that was just it: she was a judge, not a spokesperson. She was content to keep her thoughts within herself, rather than feeling the need to share her opinions with others. She couldn’t understand that sort of mindset. Why share those thoughts with others all the time?

Presently, Fluttershy felt like getting up. She took a first step, her hooves making a satisfying squishing sound in the mud. She didn’t care what Rarity said, this was just like a spa to her. The rain poured torrentially, threatening the lives of countless roof shingles and gutters around Equestria. Gradually, she found her balance in the thick mud, and trudged along at a walking pace.

She found her way to the path that ran through the middle of the park, which was holding up a little bit better than the rest of the ground, and headed into town. She passed house after house, seeing much the same thing at each: shades drawn, candles lit, and chimnies billowing out smoke. She couldn’t understand why ponies couldn’t stand weather. This wasn’t a town full of unicorns, but the more rugged pegasi and earth pony breeds, who in the past had weathered far harder. And yet, they all stayed inside.

Perhaps that was why she enjoyed the rain so much. It was the one time she could truly be alone and enjoy things her way. She felt far surer about herself when she was alone. There was nopony to prove her wrong, nor anypony to laugh if she made a mistake or did something silly. No pressure, no need to contribute to some silly social convention.

But of course, there were ponies on the other side of the spectrum, like Pinkie Pie. Fluttershy could never quite figure Pinkie out. Most of the time, she was jovial and festive, bouncing off the walls. But other times, she’d suddenly become depressed. There wasn’t any grey area between. There was happy Pinkie; there was sad Pinkie. Fluttershy didn’t understand either side of it. She was not trusting enough in others to be as open a book as Pinkie, but she couldn’t grasp why somepony would get as sad as Pinkie did. When Fluttershy cried, she wasn’t sad, she was afraid.

Looking around, Fluttershy realized she’d wandered halfway across town, a good mile from her house, based on the buildings around her. Not only that, but she was starting to shiver. Even in the summer, rain could be cold. She wanted to go home. She tried to open up her wings, but they remained locked to her sides. They did the same thing every time she got nervous, only this time she wasn’t nervous; she was frozen.

She bit her lip to stop her teeth chattering, but she was too numb to feel them pressing down. She needed to get inside quickly if she didn’t want to end up a living popsicle. She looked left and right, seeing only lowered shades and closed doors halfway up the street. But just a bit farther, she thought she could make out something different through the gloom. Something … pink, perhaps? Whatever it was, it seemed a lot more inviting than the torrential downpour she was in now. Fluttershy liked rain, sure, but she didn’t like drowning in it.

She made a beeline for the pink thing as fast as her trembling legs could carry her. Already she could picture a nice warm fireplace and a mug of warm hot chocolate. And being warm. She was so caught up in her fantasies she didn’t realize what the pink thing was until after she ran into it, or rather, her.

“Pinkie Pie? What are you doing out here?” she asked, helping her pink friend out of the puddle she’d been knocked into. Normally, she’d be apologizing all over the place, but being cold has a way of making ponies a bit shorter than usual.

At any rate, Pinkie didn’t seem to mind being drenched. Either that or giggling was suddenly her way of showing anger. “What am I doing out here? What are you doing out here, silly?”

Fluttershy thought about that for a moment, but decided she didn’t really have a good answer. “Is it alright if I come in? It’s a bit cold out here.”

“Well why didn’t you just say so?!”

“I just did,” Fluttershy deadpanned.

“Yeah, suuuuure you did,” said Pinkie with a sly grin. “Just let me get Gummy and I’ll follow you in!”

“Gummy?”

“Yeah, Gummy!” Pinkie said, pointing to the same puddle she’d crawled out of. “He likes swimming around in the puddles when it rains.”

Fluttershy shook her head. The reptile was wearing the same neutral expression it always did. She’d often wondered about Pinkie’s innate ability to understand what Gummy was thinking. It was something she could relate to, after all. She followed her friend inside Sugarcube Corner, the light and warmth beckoning her.

“Thank you so much for letting me in, Pinkie. You have no idea how cold it is out there.”

Pinkie shut the door behind them. “Of course I do, Fluttershy. You pushed me into a puddle, remember?”

“Oh yeah, sorry about that,” she said with a weak smile.

“Oh, it’s no big deal,” the earth pony replied as she climbed the stairs to the upper story. “I’m going to get some towels. Make yourself comfortable.”

“A towel does sound nice,” Fluttershy thought, walking to the nearest booth. She was about to sit down when she was interrupted by a loud thud. Then another. And another. When all was said and done, Pinkie lay at the bottom of the stairs in a bit of a compromising position, towels flung all over the floor.

“You didn’t sit down, did you?!” Pinkie shouted.

“Uh … no, but didn’t you say I could?”

“No! Well … yeah, but you can’t! The Cakes would get really mad if I got everything all wet.” Fluttershy chuckled, her face lighting up for the first time since the rain started falling. There was just something about Pinkie that could always make her smile, feel a little less unsure of herself.

“You want some help up?” she asked, deciding not to point out that Pinkie could’ve used one of her dozen towels to dry up any mess she made. Pinkie nodded, and soon ten towels and one pony were back where they ought to be. Fluttershy had restored order to Pinkie, or whatever could be considered order for a mare who could literally bounce off walls.

“You wanna head upstairs?” The mare in question proposed. “I got a fire going in the fireplace.”

“Yes, I’d love that, thank you very much.”

After drying off – and what a great feeling it was – the pair headed upstairs. Fluttershy smiled. She loved being inside more than anypony, but there was something about being inside tonight that felt just right. As they reached the top of the stairs, Pinkie opened up the door on the right. Fluttershy could feel the warmth from out in the hall. It was splendid.

“Well, are you going to come in or not?” Pinkie asked, pushing another log into the fire with a hoof.

Fluttershy nodded, joining her friend next to the fire. The two sat there for a bit, letting the warmth dry out their coats and manes. She closed her eyes, enjoying the bliss as the warmth seeped into her, warming her down to the bones. As one part of her body dried, she turned so the fire could dry another, like a marshmallow, turned to be perfectly cooked on all sides. It was in the process of doing this that she heard Pinkie break the silence.

“You never answered my question, you know.”

Fluttershy still had her eyes closed, smiling. “What question?”

“Why were you out in the rain?”

Fluttershy’s eyes shot open. She was hoping Pinkie had already forgotten about it. Leave it to the mare to lose her short attention span long enough to ask her unwanted questions. “I was just taking a walk,” she said half-truthfully.

Pinkie knew better. “Okay, nopony goes out into a cold downpour just because they want to go on a walk. That would be cah-razay!”

“Okay, fine. I just needed a bit of time to think.”

“Why not just think inside?” Pinkie asked.

Fluttershy hated how much sense her friend was making sense that the moment. “I don’t know, maybe I just wanted to be alone.”

Pinkie gasped. “But why would you ever want to be alone? It’s so much fun to have all your friends around, why would you want to miss out on all that?”

“Well, Pinkie, I don’t have that many friends.”

“Sure you do. You’ve got Twilight, Rarity, Dashie, AJ, and best of all, me! What more could you ask for?”

Fluttershy sighed in exasperation. “Pinkie, that’s only five friends.”

“I wasn’t even finished yet!” she exclaimed. “What about the spa ponies? You’ve been going there every week for years now. I’m sure they’re your friends by now, right?”

“Well, I guess for a certain point of-

“Ooh, and what about Big Mac? You seem to talk to him a lot at my parties.”

“Well, I suppose I can relate to him a bit,” Fluttershy admitted, blowing a wisp of newly-dried mane off of her face. “He’s nice.”

“Exactly, and don’t you like hanging out with him? Or Lotus? Or me?”

Fluttershy stood up, running a towel down her coat to get the last of the water the warm fire had missed. She felt a lot better now; dry and warm, inside and out. “I know it’s probably hard for you to understand, Pinkie, but sometimes I don’t like being around other ponies. Sometimes it scares me.”

“Well of course it’s a bit scary, Fluttershy. What fun would anything be if it weren’t a bit frightening?”

“I’ve always preferred to not get scared if I can help it,” Fluttershy said honestly.

Pinkie followed her friend’s lead, shaking her head to get the water out of her ears before standing up. “What, you don’t get a kick out of a walk in the Everfree, a quest for an ancient relic, a fight against a huge dragon? Haven’t you ever ramped around the house like Daring Do, jumping from chair to chair like rocks in a pool of lava?”

“Not that I can recall,” Fluttershy said, smiling a bit at Pinkie’s over-the-top presentation.

“Not even when you were an itty-bitty filly?”

“Maybe when I was little, I guess. But I was still by myself when I did that sort of thing. I never really liked to be around other ponies. And why do you care so much?”

“Because I really care about you, Flutters … as a friend, I mean.” She finished with a bit of an awkward smile. “Fluttershy, do you think I was always like this, you know, bouncing off the walls?”

“Well, I suppose I’ve never thought about it,” she replied lamely. “I’m really sorry if that makes you feel bad or anything. I wasn’t trying to!”

Pinkie put a hoof around her friend. “No reason to feel down, silly. If you hadn’t told me just a few seconds ago, I never would’ve guessed you were the type to go romping around the living room.”

“Pinkie, I said I did that sometimes.”

“But isn’t that enough? There’s that little spark in there, that little voice that’s shouting ‘I want to try something new’. You’ve just got to go looking for it, that’s all!”

“But how am I supposed to look for something like that?” she asked

“With the help of a good friend,” Pinkie said, smiling from ear to ear.

Fluttershy sighed. This was going to be a long, long night.

Taking Inventory

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Apparently, it was a beautiful Equestrian morning. The sun was only just starting on its way to wherever Celestia stashed it after it set. The birds were whistling some tune because they weren’t smart enough to remember the words. There were flowers everywhere because nopony bothered to eat them until lunch. As you can tell, I didn’t give a crap.

It wasn’t that I hated nature, more that I’ve always had more important things to care about. There’s food, mares, friends, mares, the bills, mares, and most importantly, my business.

In fact, that’s where I was walking, just like I’ve done every day since I opened up the store. It’s the culmination of my morning routine that start with me dragging my way down the stairs to my coffeepot. Then I dunk my head in a sink full of cold water to help the caffeine along. Finally, I get dressed and head out to work. I’ve gotten so good at this by now that it only takes me five minutes.

Not to brag, of course. I’m not the bragging type.

I looked up to see that I was nearly at the store. Next, I turned at the end of Stirrup Street and onto Market Lane, where most of the stores in Ponyville were located. Back when I started the store, I’d made sure to get a building right in the middle of it to maximize business. It was only one of the many genius business decisions I’ve made over the years.

I looked up at the sign admiringly as I approached the store. After pulling the keys out of my saddlebags and unlocking the door, I checked to see if anything has been stolen overnight. This hadn’t happened in years, but you never know when somepony would rather steal a couple dozen quills than pay for them. I checked the register as well before heading into the back room to go over last month’s sales records once again. I knew it would be a least a few hours before anypony came to get quills, which left me with some time to use.

I wasn’t quite awake yet, and I accidentally ran into the door to the back room. Grumbling, I opened the door to find that the records were still sitting out on the desk from yesterday morning, which had been my second check of the records, making this a triple-check. I yawned loudly as I sat down, quickly absorbing myself in the all-important papers. As important as they were, I started daydreaming somewhere along the way. Even though the store was everything to me, some of the things I had to do to keep it running were monotonous to say the least.

Other ponies never understood this, marefriends in particular. They all thought that I spent too much time on by business and not enough on them. If they had actually wanted to be with me in the first place, they would have let me pursue my life’s dream in peace. Everypony else thought that the store would be fine if I relaxed my hold, but I wasn’t willing to take that chance for fear that disaster would strike, or an opportunity for profit would present itself and I would miss it.

And opportunities had presented themselves many times over my career, like when a huge rainstorm hit Ponyville two years ago. A week before the storm, I was at the bar talking to a friend of mine who worked at the weather factory. We had a few drinks, and I asked him what the weather was going to be like over the next few weeks. Normally, he wouldn’t tell me that sort of information, since it was confidential and all. But alcohol tends to make ponies more liable to spill information, and I made sure he got plenty of that. By the time I left, I had learned that there would be huge storm coming in the next week. I took this knowledge to my advantage and ordered three times my usual stock.

When the storm hit, nearly half of the houses in Ponyville were flooded, and the furniture within was ruined. After the cleanup was done, I opened up my store and sold all of the sofas. I also dropped the price to 75%, which was great for my reputation but still allowed me to profit in the end. I had made sure to read up on the economic laws associated with natural disasters that same night the week before, and I had discovered two things. Firstly, if I dropped my prices by 25% or more after a disaster, then the government would give me more than enough to offset that. Secondly, if my store was damaged enough, I could qualify for money to fix it. Conveniently, enough damage happened to my quills before I was able to activate the shielding spell around the house, so I was able to collect even more money.

By the end of it all, I’d made enough money to pay for a vacation to the Marebbean Islands. My mind started to wander to the memory of those Marebbean mares when the door opened, which brought me out of my pleasant daydreams.

“It’s always when I’m thinking about mares, isn’t it?” I mumbled. I shoved the papers back in the folder messily and slapped a quick smile on my face to hide my annoyance. I walked out into the store and saw that there was indeed somepony in the shop, and of all ponies, a fellow business owner.

… A fellow business owner who was also the hardest catch in all of Ponyville, and probably all of Equestria.

“Good morning, Davenport. I see the shop is running smoothly, no?”

I tried to keep from staring at her, or at least tried to keep her from noticing that I was staring at her. I took a second to collect myself before speaking, and as usual, my delivery was excellent. “Hey Rarity, what brings you around? Quills? Sofas? Anything else?”

At first, Rarity didn’t get what I was hinting at. “I thought you only sold Quills and Sofas.”

“I do. The third item isn’t for sale.”

She was clueless for a while, but eventually got it, as I knew she would. She chuckled lightly, apparently finding the hidden meaning in my words funny. “I’m sorry Mr. Davenport, but the answer is no. We are not going out again.”

I pretended to be taken aback, despite the fact that I’d already known she would reject me. “Mr. Davenport?” I asked. “I thought we were on more friendly terms than that, at least.”

Rarity stopped fiddling with a box of quills long enough to look at me. “Well if you think that, then you are sorely mistaken.”

I knew I only had one more shot, so I had to make it count. “Aw, come on. Don’t tell me it wasn’t fun. And you’re looking very pretty today, I might add.”

“We only went on one date,” she said forcefully. “Now if you don’t stop flirting with me, I’ll take my business elsewhere.”

Knowing I’d already gone too far, I decided to drop the subject. “I see. So what are you here for? A sofa?”

“Indeed I am. Sweetie Belle set my last one on fire yesterday.”

“Let me guess, trying to teach her magic again, right?”

Rarity sighed loudly. “Yes, I was. Do you by any chance have the same brand I bought last time?”

Quickly, I brought up the memory of her last visit. She’d come because her cat had practically scratched a hole in the couch, and she’d been unable to salvage it, despite her skills as a seamstress. It took me a little longer to remember what brand she’d bought.

“You got … a rose-colored Carousellia special … with rose trim … and a hickory frame, if I remember correctly.”

Rarity was taken aback by my perfect recollection. “Why, yes, that’s exactly what I got. How did you remember?”

“Photographic memory.”

“Ah, I see. So, do you have any more of those?”

“I have that style of couch, but I don’t have that color. The only two I have in stock are myrtle green and navy blue.”

“That’s a shame. The rose color matched the drapes perfectly. Oh well, I guess I’ll be going then. Ta ta.”

I ran from behind the counter and right up beside her, putting a leg around her and leading her back into the store. “Now, Rarity, let’s not be so hasty. I have plenty of sofas that are rose-colored, and I can get them to you at a better price than those Canterlot stores.”

She shrugged me off with a smile. “How about this: If you can get that same one in stock for me, I’ll come buy it from you next week, okay?”

Inside, I felt like I was going to explode at the task, but I kept it contained, smiling painfully. “I’ll see what I can do.”

With her own smile, Rarity walked up the street, calling back, “Thank you ever so much, Davenport. I’ll be sure to pick that up.”

She turned around and continued strolling along. As she walked, every stallion’s eyes were riveted on her gem-emblazoned flank. A few seconds later, a chorus of slapping noises could be heard as their marefriends gave them each a slap in the face. Fortunately for me, I was single at the moment, so there was nopony there to hit me.

When she turned out of sight, I walked back into the store, once again getting back to matters of greater importance. Although it had been well worth the smile and leaving her with a good impression, tracking down the sofa Rarity wanted would not be easy. Carousellia had only made a hundred or so of that particular sofa, and it had been hard enough for me to get the first one. The only way I could possibly get another would be to buy it out of somepony’s house. After doing that, I would lose bits if I sold it at regular price. I would have to charge her extra just to break even. I made a mental note to do just that and also to move her up to the front of the list. After all, it was Rarity.

“Well, at least she’s coming back,” I said with a sigh.

I waited out the rest of the day behind the counter. A hoofful of ponies came to get quills, but none of them were worth remembering. Before I knew it, it was time to close shop. Some of the quills were undoubtedly uncategorized by this point, but I decided to leave that until morning. Taking the keys in my mouth, I walked outside the shop, locked it up, and threw them into my saddlebags with expert precision. I walked out the door with a smile on my face, heading out to the bar for a well-deserved drink.

East Canterlot Toodle-Oo (Incomplete)

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Suddenly, it was all very real. In front of the young stallion lay the stage, empty save a drum set, a base with amp to match, and the pair of musicians tending to these instruments. It wasn’t a particularly large one; the drum set alone took up a good quarter of it. From above, a half dozen stage lights cast a harsh glow on the faded wooden boards and reflected off of the drummer’s cymbals. On the left was a thick brick wall and on the right was an audience he could not yet see. He could hear the clinking of pints of cider and the merry conversations of the denizens of Discord’s Den, the premier tavern on this side of Canterlot, not just for a pony looking for a drink, but for musicians looking for a gig.

There was one direction the very nervous pony had not looked yet. He turned his head, looking backward towards the stage door. The door lead outside, and from there one could go anywhere – avoid anything – if they took that path. Gulping, he looked back at the stage, peeking around the corner of the wall between him and the crowd. It was a full house, every seat was packed with ponies eager to see the new hotshot sax player, the son of the bartender, and the colt who graduated the Canterlot Conservatory of Music near the top of his class. He was a true musician.

At the moment, he felt like anything but. He felt like a little cold again, fumbling with an instrument that did not yet feel right in his hooves. He remembered how it was back then, all the squeaks and notes played wrong, and getting just a little bit better every day. In fact, it didn’t feel like it was all that long ago. He closed his eyes and he could almost see himself back in that time.


And then he was. He opened his eyes to find himself 20 lengths to the left, in the crowd rather than on the stage. Or at least, he was where the crowd was supposed to be. The tavern was now empty, both of ponies and the noises of them. He felt like he should be shocked, and he was, but his body didn’t seem to act the part. His hooves were shifting nervously but he didn’t remember wanting them to move.

It was like his body was on autopilot; he was in the cockpit, but the plane had long since taken control. It was a frightening experience, and he wanted to be scared, but he wasn’t. He was a visitor - no, a prisoner - in his own mind. He could see, hear, smell and feel everything he normally could, but he couldn’t close his eyes, plug his ears or cover his nose, and if ponies had the capability to stop feeling, he wouldn’t have been able to do that either.

Not being able to control his body made it hard to get his bearings, but he managed. He was in the bar room, facing the double doors that lead to the restaurant section of the tavern. On the table to his right as a bucket of soapy water and a rag, meaning that he’d just finished cleaning the tables. But other than that, there wasn’t much to tell him where he was. The room was the same as it always was: nine large tables in a three by three square with just enough room between them for a waiter to fit. The abandoned glasses and plates were stacked on a counter in the corner, waiting to be cleaned. The stage, which was on the wall opposite the door, was probably empty, although he couldn’t tell since his head didn’t feel like turning that far around.

It would be nice if I had a mirror, he thought. Maybe then I’d be able to tell what year this is.

Suddenly, he heard a noise coming from behind the door in front of him and his body moved his head to look up at it. His ears flattened as they always did when he was worried about something. He still couldn’t remember where he was and what he was doing, but he was fairly sure he knew who was coming in his direction, and that all of this had something to do with them.

The door in front of him opened, and his body lurched in surprise. If his brain could’ve lurched, it would’ve too.

“You’re already done cleaning the tables? That’s fast!” Walking between them, he seemed to be checking my - or at least, my former self’s - work. “And you didn’t miss anything either. That’s impressive, no doubt about it. But why are you still here? I’ve told you before that you can leave whenever you’re done. That’s why you have the housekey.”

It occurred to him that he would have to speak, but he didn’t know how. he waited for a few seconds, hoping his body would do the rest of the work like it had before. Just when he was starting to panic, his lips started moving, and the words came out.

“Well, no, it’s not that. It’s just that I’ve got something to ask you.”

“Shoot.” His dad motioned to a nearby table, and they both sat down. It was a relief to know that everything seemed to be going as it had been.

“Well, I’ve been practicing sax a lot, you know?” he said, fumbling over his words.

“I know, and I’m really impressed,” he said with a smile. “And you know I’ve seen my fair share of sax players in my time.”

“Yep, I do. So you know how seriously I’ve been taking it, right?”

His father only nodded, his eyes narrowing.

“You know, I’ve always wanted to be up on that stage, ever since I was little.”

“If you wanna ask me something, just say it. You’re not a stallion yet, but you’re old enough to act the part.”

His dad was right, of course. There really wasn’t any sense of putting it off. The question was going to be hard no matter how long he waited. But his younger self hadn’t thought of it that way, was still the nervous little colt he’d always been, and still was in many ways. That younger self didn’t want to speak, and the other pony in the room was starting to pick up on that.

“Listen, I’m sorry if I startled you, but you’re going to have to ask sooner or later. From the way you’re acting, I’d say this something pretty serious, right?”

He nodded, part of him grateful to not have to speak.

“So just say it, then.”

Well, so much for that, he thought. He honestly couldn’t remember how long this conversation had taken, nor what He looked up at his father, and was greeted by that rare compassionate look that sometimes broke his usual stoic air.

Spike Saved The Day

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Spike joyfully strode through the streets of Ponyville, his tail slowly moving back and forth as he walked. Well, more like waddled. But either way, he was moving in a forward direction, and that’s what’s important.

There were a few things putting a spring in the young dragon’s step. First, he had just come from Rarity’s Carousel Boutique, where he had been helping her work. He and Rarity both knew that it was just a cover so he could spend more time with her, but she didn’t seem to mind the attention. Ever since the incident where Spike had grown greedy, literally, and thousands of bits’ worth of damage to the town, Rarity had become fully aware of Spike’s affections. Although Spike had never gotten to say what he had intended to as they fell, Rarity had received the message well enough. The dressmaking unicorn didn’t mind having Spike around to help her, and if anything, she thought it was flattering that he wanted to spend so much time with her.

Spike was also happy because of the events of the previous day. A smile came to his face as he recalled them. That day, he – with the help of Twilight and her friends – had saved all of Equestria from a wicked king bent on the enslavement of the crystal ponies. No small feat. And no small amount of stairs, either. The whole time, he’d been walking up stairs, walking down stairs, or trying to climb down a tall crystal thing with the crystal heart in claw, somehow managing to not fall off the edge. In the end, he did tumble off, but got saved by Princess Cadence, so it didn’t really matter. The crystal ponies had been liberated, and it was - for the most part - because of him.

He would have given himself a pat on the back, but his arms were too short for that. Still, he didn’t need to do that to be proud of himself. He was in the middle of his ego-tending train of thought when he collided with a certain Ponyville teacher.

“Oh, I’m so sorry Cheerilee! It always seems like I’m bumping into you.”

Cheerilee chuckled. She too had noticed that the young dragon ran into her an uncannily often, and it seemed that she always had groceries when it happened. “It’s alright, really,” she said. She started picking up her food, and Spike helped her. Before long, all of the items were back in the bag, and Cheerilee was on her way. But just as she started trotting off, she stopped and caught up with Spike.

“Wait, didn’t you bring down the heart crystal in that incident in the Crystal Empire?” Spike answered with a nod. Cheerilee smiled. “Well, I think I owe you a thank you.”

“It’s really no big deal,” said Spike. “I mean, all I did was--.”

“Spike, it is a big deal! You were really brave, and you should give yourself some credit for that.”

Spike took a second to think about that statement. Despite the fact that Spike was already happy about what he did, the fact that he had saved all of Equestria was still sinking in.

“You know what? You’re right! It is pretty awesome that I did that!” Spike said with a renewed confidence.

“It is,” said Cheerilee, chuckling at Spike’s boyish attitude. “I assume Pinkie’s going to be throwing some sort of party for the whole thing?”

“Yep. It’s tonight at Sugarcube Corner. Are you going?”

“Oh, maybe, but I’ve got some reports to grade and I’m not sure if I’ll be able to find the time.”

“Oh, well I’ll probably run into you soon anyway. Goodbye!”

“Have a nice day Spike!”

Now twice as happy about himself, Spike continued on the way to the library. He didn’t have to go back there, because Twilight had decided to take the day off from research, something she didn’t do often. Spike probably should have taken advantage of the opportunity, but he found himself going back anyway, mostly because he wanted to hang out with Twilight.

A few minutes and egotistical daydreams later, Spike found himself in front of the library. Just as he was about to walk in, a crowd of ponies blocked his way. There was a flashing of lights that temporarily blinded the poor dragon. Spike put his hands up to cover his eyes, but by the time he did, the flashes were gone. Rather, the world decided to overload yet another one of his senses.

“Spike, how does it feel knowing you saved all of Equestria?”

“We’ve heard of the effects of the Crystal Heart, but nothing specific. Can you tell us exactly what happened?”

“Is there anything you would like to say to the public?

“How were you able to deliver the Crystal Heart even after a unicorn as powerful as Twilight Sparkle failed?”

The voices continued for second after agonizing second, barraging Spike’s eardrums with more sound than they were meant to handle. Putting his claws over his ears did little to shut out the noise. Frantically, he looked left and right for a way to escape, but all he saw were the legs of at least a dozen ponies that surrounded him. Just as he was about to give up, he felt an oddly familiar tingling sensation spread throughout his body. Spike couldn’t quite put a claw on where he had felt it, but before he had enough time to figure it out, he heard a loud zapping noise, and the world around him disappeared. A mist-like aura clouded his vision, and he felt as if his body was floating in nothingness. A second later, he heard another zap, and the ‘fog’ cleared from his eyes.

“Oh right, teleportation. That’s what that was.” Spike rubbed his eyes to clear some his vision, but when he opened them again, he found that the world was rocking back and forth like a pendulum. Spike was puzzled by this. Normally, Equestria did not move. He tried to take a step forward, but he found that the ground was moving as well. Frantically, the young dragon looked around the library, which only seemed to shake more when he turned his head. To his right, he saw a purple unicorn walking up to him. He could not figure out who they were through the blurriness caused by the quaking. Oddly, the pony did not seem to be affected by it, walking normally. When she got to Spike, the unidentified mare put a hoof on his head, and suddenly, the world stopped moving.

“Whoa, how did you do that?” he asked, turning towards the mare. Now that his vision was not blurred, he could see her clearly. “Twilight? That was you?”

“Of course it was. And how did I do what exactly?”

“Make the world stop shaking like that.”

Twilight chuckled. “Spike, the world wasn’t shaking. You were.”

Spike thought about it for a second before it dawned on him. The teleportation spell had made him dizzy. Again. A figurative light bulb appeared over his head at the realization, but it only had a short moment to itself before Pinkie Pie snatched it out of the air. Spike, who had not seen the pink party pony when he was zapped in, was surprised.

“Hey Pinkie!”

“Hiya Spike! How’s your day been?”

“Pretty good, except for what just happened,” Spike said before turning to his surrogate parent with a look of confusion. “What happened exactly?”

Twilight sighed, more than a hint of annoyance in her face as she turned to look at the library entrance, which was now boarded up with some two-by-fours. “I should have figured you wouldn’t know. You probably got overwhelmed, didn’t you?”

“Yeah, just a little, but who were they?”

“The paparazzi.”

As often happened with Twilight, Spike had no idea what she was saying. “The papa-what-now?”

Pinkie, who was busy screwing the light bulb into a lamp, gave the answer. “Newsponies, Spike.”

Twilight turned to Pinkie, nodding in appreciation. “Exactly. They’re the most ruthless and stubborn ponies you’ll ever meet. And for the record, that comment about my failure was completely unwarranted.”

Spikie, although he heard what she said, was distracted by what a certain physics-defying, fourth-wall-breaking pony in the room was doing.

“Pinkie, where did you get that light bulb?”

“From you, Spike!”

Spike frowned. “Pinkie, I never gave you a light bulb.”

“Don’t be silly Spike; of course you did!”

Twilight looked on as the two had a five minute argument about where the light bulb had come from. Rather than ending the argument herself, she opted with the much easier solution of waiting for Spike to give up, which was of course the result. Even after he refrained, there was still a hint of annoyance in his expression.

“So what did they want from me, exactly?” he asked.

“Spike, you saved all of Equestria a few days ago. What do you think they want from you?”

“Oh yeah,” he said. “So when will they leave me alone?”

“Hold that thought.” Twilight had already started walking over to the bathroom, which she proceeded to enter. A few moments later, the mare came back with some sort of herb in tow.

“Take this; it’ll make you feel less dizzy.” She opened the bottle and sprinkled some into a glass of water she had filled from the tap. Spike quickly drank the concoction, grimaced, then swallowed.

“If Zecora can make herbs that cure almost everything, then why can’t she get rid of the taste? Blech!”

Twilight chuckled at the joke, but quickly settled down. “As for your question Spike, do you remember what happened after we defeated Discord?”

Spike nodded, “I had to go to the hospital to get stomach surgery, but none of the doctors had enough experience with dragons, so we had to go all the way to Zecora’s homeland to get it done. And after that, I still had to go back to Canterlot hospital for a week.”

Twilight chuckled nervously. She had forgotten about that. “Yes, well, I guess you weren’t around for it. What about after we defeated Nightmare Moon?”

“I had insomnia for two days because my sleeping patterns got messed up from the all-nighter. I slept for a whole day after that.”

“Okay, I remembered that, but did you notice anything weird after that? Anypony you didn’t recognize?”

Spike put his claw to his chin, pondering the past. “Well, now that you mention it, there were a lot of ponies following you around. Why was that?”

“Same reason there are ponies at the front door now, Spike, and I’m not the only one. Rainbow Dash probably has the most experience with the media because of her flying. Rarity has some press from her shop as well. The rest of us have saved Equestria four times now, and after each time, the media was all over us. We all react differently. Rainbow and Rarity always eat up the attention, Pinkie Pie here invites them all to a party, Fluttershy is usually too scared to come out of her house for a week or so, and I try to keep my cool until I can’t stand it anymore and lock myself in the Library. Of course, I always lock myself in the library, so you probably didn’t notice a difference.”

“You can say that again,” said the often overworked assistant.

“Twilight, you should really go out a lot more,” said the hyperactive pink pony, who had managed to stay quiet much longer than usual. “You miss so many of my parties. Oh, that reminds me: Spike, did I tell you I’m throwing you a party?!”

“Yeah, you told me yesterday. But the party’s at Sugarcube Corner, right? Why are you here?”

“I came here to see if Twilight needed help cleaning the place up after she went all crazy, uprooted the library, and almost put you in the hospital again.” Pinkie Pie rolled her eyes around to indicate ‘craziness’ before continuing. “But she says she’s got it handled.”

Spike groaned. Fortunately for him, the impact to his head had only caused a minor concussion, which was a miracle considering how large the Magical Compendium Volumes 1 – 36 was, and how fast it had been flying when it hit him in the head. This, of course, was the reason why the teleportation had made him more dizzy than usual.

But the slight dizziness was not the only thing occupying the noggin of the young dragon. “Pinkie, did you invite the newsponies to the party?”

“Well of course I did, silly. Once they heard you would be there, they knocked down my door asking to be invited. How could I refuse?”

Spike’s eyes were wide open, the expression frozen on his face in a way not unlike Discord in his stone prison. When he finally did move, a loud noise came from within the library that could be easily heard by the newsponies outside, not to mention half of the town.

“NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!”

[img] http://images.wikia.com/mlp/images/3/30/Spike_nooh%21_S1E19.png[/img]

Hooray For Shopping

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From the outside, the Library looked almost normal, as if it hadn’t been ripped out of the ground, hurled into the air, then crashed down thanks to a magical outburst a few short days before. It had even fallen down in the correct place, and by some miracle at a level angle to the ground. Despite all this, however, Twilight could not help but notice that some familiar things were missing. Her telescope had been broken into smithereens, and the old bee’s nest had fallen down as well. The nest had grown so large over the years that it contained hundreds of bees, which had wreaked havoc with the construction ponies trying to fix up the library. Fluttershy had generously dealt with the stinging insects for Twilight, as she preferred beekeeping to extermination. Finding the queen bee had taken her all day, and even with a protective force field around her, a few of them still found ways to sting her, as if they were impervious to magic. Despite her vast encyclopedic knowledge of just about everything, the unicorn didn’t know how her timid friend was going to go about her task. But those casual thoughts were far from her mind, as there were more important things to worry about.

.… Like the Library. While there was little damage done externally, the inside of the hollowed-out tree was a different story entirely. The basement had been pulverized, and most of the scientific equipment had been damaged. The destruction done to the foundation of the library also left it unstable. She had been told that the slightest earthquake could reduce the entire structure to splinters, and considering what the library had been through over time, Twilight didn’t doubt it. Between parasprites, rampaging assistants, lassoed trees, and giant boulders named Tom, the damage had indeed stacked up since her arrival in Ponyville.

On the ground floor, the floorboards had been uprooted, and Twilight had been forced to replace them with plywood sheets. In her earlier visit, Pinkie Pie had been gracious enough to not mention the disarray. She just acted like everything was peachy, even if she did have to step over fallen books to make her way around.

Yet to Twilight, the worst part wasn’t even the damage itself. Her insurance agent had come only an hour ago, informing her that her plan didn’t cover self-inflicted magical damage, which meant that the studious mare would be forced to borrow bits from Princess Celestia.

Again.

Twilight always felt guilty about borrowing money from the Princess, but knew it was inevitable. Even if she didn’t ask for it, Celestia would still send it to her, and probably a larger amount than necessary. At least if she asked for it, she could tell her the correct amount to send.

With all this weighing heavily on her mind, the straight-maned mare walked through the newly-bought front door into the library. The makeshift floor was covered in a fine layer of dust from the construction. Stacks of books - most of which had escaped serious damage – were waiting to be sorted. The windows were broken, and all of the furniture had been ruined. It was easily the biggest mess the library had been in. Each step kicked up dust, making the violet unicorn cough as she walked over to where her writing supplies were kept, intending to write the letter to Princess Celestia. She was greeted with an empty space where her desk used to be.

“I forgot, my desk got crushed by the statue. Silly me!” She said. But despite the jubilant tone of her voice, she wasn’t happy. Her face twitched a little, and in that instant, she bore a striking resemblance to the Cheshire Cat. A vein throbbed on her forehead as her blood pressure rose, and she felt like she was going to snap. However, she was able to keep her anger contained through some deep, cleansing breaths. Twilight smiled smugly, rather proud of herself for not exploding into her typical, stress-induced rage.

“I guess all that stress therapy really did work after all!” She said with a laugh. “But still, when am I going to get the quills? I’m supposed to buy furniture today.”

Although she had prevented herself from going berserk, the fact that she was talking to herself clearly showed that she was still worried. At the moment, she seemed to have forgotten that it was weird to talk to yourself out loud. Twilight started pacing, as she always did when she had schedule conflicts.

“If I do both today, I’ll have to wait until tomorrow to find a floor replacement. But if I push that back, I’ll have to wait another day to go to Canterlot to replace my telescope. I wish there was some way I could get quills and sofas in the same place!”

On cue, the door suddenly opened, followed by someone diving head-first into the house. Twilight saw cameras flashing accompanied by the sound of clicks and the voices of at least two dozen ponies before the door slammed shut, muffling the chaos outside. When Twilight turned around, she saw a familiar purple dragon standing with his his back against the door, breathing heavily. Before long, the voices faded away. Finally feeling secure, he let out a sigh and dusted himself off.

“Spike! Where have you been all day?”

“Where do you think?” he said, more than a hint of annoyance in his voice.

“Oh, those newsponies still bothering you?”

“Bothering me? It’s a lot more than bothering me.” Spike said before angrily stomping off into the kitchen. The wires had been hooked up by the construction team the day before, so the freezer was working, at least for now. Spike grabbed a tub of ice cream and a spoon before coming back out into the main room.

He then pointed to the tub. “I can eat this, right? I promise I won’t eat the whole thing.”

Twilight wanted to object, but considering how rough Spike’s day had been, she decided to cut him some slack. If anything, the treat would calm him down some.

“Sure, but don’t kick up too much dust; It’ll get in the ice cream.”

“Got it,” he said, his speech still muffled from the first bite. He walked over to Twilight, tiptoeing delicately to keep the dust from spreading out. Once he got there, he ate another spoonful of ice cream.

“You know what would be really cool, Twilight?”

“What?”

“If they made gemstone sprinkles. I mean this vanilla, it’s great and all, but it’s still pretty plain. But put some sapphires on it, and it would taste awesome!”

Twilight wasn’t convinced. “Spike, there wouldn’t be any sort of market for it. You’d be the only one in town to buy it.”

Spike face-hoofed, or more accurately, face-clawed. “Ugh, Twilight. Why do you have to ruin everything!”

“What did I do?” the librarian asked incredulously.

“Never mind,” said the dragon, swallowing yet another spoonful. Twilight knew that he would probably go through the whole thing without thinking, but she didn’t really have the heart to tell him not to, or to argue with him, at the moment. The paparazzi was clearly bothering him more than she had originally thought. Most ponies would try to talk about this sort of thing with friends or family, but Twilight, as socially naive as she could often be, knew Spike well enough to realize that discussing it would probably make him more upset. The firebreather was not one to let other ponies help him right away, so the astute pony decided to leave him be, and better yet, distract him with something else.

“Spike, I need some help with a dilemma.”

Spike perked up. “Really, what is it Twilight?”

“Well, I was planning to go buy some furniture today, but something else came up, and now I don’t know which is more important.”

“You were going to get furniture?’ Spike said, putting his claw to his chin in thought. “That’s weird, I don’t remember writing that on your schedule. Actually, I haven’t written a schedule in days.”

“That’s just the problem, Spike. We don’t have any quills either.”

“Then go buy some.” Spike suggested with a shrug.

“That’s just it, Spike. If I get them today I’ll have to push all sorts of things back, and it’s already hard enough to plan without a schedule written out.”

Spike scratched his head with a claw. “So you’re saying you need both furniture and writing stuff, right?”

“That’s exactly what I need, Spike.”

“So, like, Quills and Sofas?”

“Yep. How could I get them in the same day, Spike?” Twilight asked, looking up at the clock that hung above the fridge. “I’ve only got two hours before Pinkie’s party!”

The young dragon grimaced. “Oh yeah, that. Twilight, do I have to go?”

“Of course you do. You’re the guest of honor.”

“I know, but Pinkie said she’s inviting all those ponies that are stalking me, and I can’t get away from them in Sugarcube Corner. There’s nowhere to run!”

“Spike, have you ever considered telling them what they want to know?”

“Yes. But Celestia swore me to secrecy about a lot of it. Most of the other stuff I know is stuff they already know. What am I supposed to tell them?”

“I guess I see how that would be a problem. But if I can’t get both of those things in an hour, we won’t be able to go to the party at all!”

“That wouldn’t be such a bad thing,” remarked Spike, putting the ice cream on one of the vacant bookshelves. Sighing in annoyance, Twilight charged up her horn and teleported the frozen treat into where she figured the icebox would be. She would have to deal with any possible mater fusion later. Meanwhile, Spike elaborated. “I think I have your solution. For the quills and stuff, I mean.”

Twilight was surprised that he’d come up with a solution before her. She was so surprised that she doubted Spike really had a resolution, but she decided it couldn’t hurt to try.

“What is it, Spike?”

Spike stifled a chuckle. “You really haven’t figured this out already?”

Twilight shook her head.

The young dragon could no longer help himself, and his laughter echoed off the bookshelves. It took on an almost sinister tone, and Spike took on the mental appearance of a villain- all that was missing was a moustache and top-hat. Despite the fact that she had spells that could give him both of those, the mare in the room was not so amused.

“Spike!!” Twilight shouted. “Just tell me what it is!”

“Okay, fine, I’ll tell you. You know that place you always go to buy quills, right?”

“Yep.” To Twilight, Spike’s idea seemed solid so far. Going to get the quills was more urgent and that made it the logical first stop. At the same time, the young dragon’s voice reminded her of how her parents had often talked to her when she was a foal, which infuriated the violet unicorn, to say the least.

“You do know what else they sell, riiiiight?” Spike said, leaning towards Twilight with a knowing grin.

Twilight grimaced at his condescending tone. “Spike, of course I know what else he sells. Ink and Scrolls!”

Spike couldn’t help snickering a bit. “No, Twilight, that’s not what I mean.”

When Twilight just stared back at him quizzically, the green-scaled drake continued, but did not get to the point immediately, wanting to see how long it would take the unicorn to figure it out. It wasn’t often that the Princess’ student made such an oversight.

“Are you sure Davenport doesn’t sell anything else?”

Twilight rolled her eyes. “Yes, I’m sure. I’ve gone to the store hundreds of times!”

“Okay, then this next question should be a no brainer.” Spike said, clearing his throat. “Tell me; what is the name of his store?”

“That’s easy. Davenport’s Quill and Sofa ... shop.” Realizing her foolishness, Twilight put her head in her hooves, letting out a deep sigh. When she looked back up, she met Spike’s smug gaze.

“It was that obvious? The whole time?”

Spike only nodded, taking in the moment that he would remember for weeks, months, even year to come. A time when he outsmarted Princess Celestia’s star pupil, and arguably the most intelligent unicorn in Equestria.

Twilight, now accepting the humor in the situation, chuckled.

“Wow, I’m pretty stupid sometimes, aren’t I?”

Spike was very careful in answering that question. “You aren’t stupid, you just overanalyze everything.”

“I guess it’s something I have to work on,” Twilight said. “Well then, I guess I’m going to Davenport’s.”


That bit of humor had been just what Twilight had needed at the moment, and although it didn’t relieve all of the stress, it did quite a bit. She had a passing thought that she should accompany Rarity on her next spa visit. A relaxing day at the spa was just what the mare needed at the moment. Come to think of it, Spike could use some stress relief too. With Rarity there, it would be easy to get him to come, but this would have to wait for later, as she and her assistant had gone separate ways for the time being.

Pinkie Pie had requested that Spike stop by so he could judge the party setup, even though it would doubtless be perfect as usual. Whether or not he would like the party itself was a good question, although knowing his love of parties, the paparazzi probably wouldn’t be enough to spoil it entirely.

Twilight’s job was a little harder than judging streamers and confetti. She had to buy the quills and the sofas, hoping that being a regular customer might get her a deal, or at the very least a loan. Since she’d had to pay the construction ponies in advance, the mare had no idea whether or not she had enough money for the sofa, armchair, and the hoofful of chairs she needed to buy. Davenport’s typical manner of earning the most possible profit out of every sale wouldn’t help things, either.

And yet, Twilight decided to let it all go, something she normally wouldn’t do. She’d had enough things to worry about over the last few days: the crystal empire, the library, and not to mention Spike’s mental well-being. She just wanted to let it all go, and figured that a combination of Pinkie’s party and a potential trip to the spa would let her do just that. But for now, she still had to deal with her furniture fiasco.

Walking in the door of the Quill and Sofa shop, Twilight was surprised to see another pony other than the familiar brown-maned salespony.

“Hey Rarity, what are you doing here?”

The fashionista turned gracefully, trotting over to Twilight to give her a friendly hug.

“Why Darling, it’s so nice to see you! I haven’t seen you since we got back to Ponyville. Spike told me all about the library, although I did have a pretty good idea after we left the place.”

Twilight found herself snorting as her annoyance started building. She mentally reminded herself to remember her therapy and managed to cap a lid on her rage for the time being. “Well, it’s not really a big deal. I just need to replace some things that I … destroyed.”

“I’d assume you’re here for quills, as usual?” The stallion behind the counter asked.

“Actually, I’m in need of some furniture too. You know, having quills and sofas in the same place is really convenient!”

“Yep, ponies are saying that all the time. All the time …” Davenport said with a tone of cynicism, though Twilight didn’t notice.

“So Rarity, you didn’t answer my question. Why are you here? You don’t seem to be buying anything.”

Rarity chuckled. “From this old chap? Heavens no! I just came by to visit, that’s all.”


“Visit? I thought you were still mad at him for that date you two had a few months ago.”

“Oh, I am. That’s the point. I come by here every so often to tease. Now normally I would never stoop to something so appalling, but this fellow doesn’t seem to mind in the slightest, does he?”

Davenport had zoned out, absorbed in his admiration of Rarity’s flank, and it took him a good few seconds to realize that the snow-colored mare had noticed. When he did, he blinked a few times, but didn’t show any outward signs of embarrassment as most stallions would. He treated it as if it were routine, which for him it was.

“No, I don’t mind. Any day with a mare as pretty as you is a good day in my book.” Davenport said, leaning in with a smile. “And also, is that a new shade of eyeshadow you’re wearing?”

Despite herself, Rarity couldn’t help but smile. “The endless compliments don’t hurt either. Now I should really let you get to what you’re doing, Twilight.” Rarity’s voice lowered to a whisper. “Just a warning though; he’s a lot more shifty when it comes to selling the sofas. If he tries to lead you towards something, that’s probably not something you want to buy.”

Twilight had heard enough stories to know that what her fellow element of harmony had said was certainly true. Since the quills were smaller items, and she was a loyal customer, she’d never had to deal with the profit-obsessed side of the stallion. A vast majority of the stories also depicted him as a player, and this had been apparent to Twilight for a long while, even if those affections had never been directed to her. Either way, she decided to take Rarity’s advice.

“So, what do you need?” said Davenport cheerfully. “A sofa, maybe?”

“A few things, actually. Other than a sofa, I need an armchair and a few wooden ones as well.”

Davenport’s smile grew a little wider when he heard the length of Twilight’s list. He came around the counter and lead her into the second room of the store where he kept all of the furniture. Inside were assorted Sofas, Loveseats, Armchairs, Recliners, Rocking Chairs, Stools and Benches in various hues. Each had a price tag attached, and as the money-strained unicorn looked at each number, she couldn’t help but wince.

“Uh, excuse me, Davenport?” She timidly asked.

The stallion, who had been rambling on about the various options she had available, turned back around. “Yes, what is it Ms. Sparkle?”

“I was just wondering if you could show me the cheapest ones. I don’t have too many bits right now.”

Twilight thought she saw a crack in the salespony’s jovial attitude.

“Are you sure you don’t want this one? It’s a good deal, and-”

“No, I mean I literally don’t have many bits with me right now, and all the bits I have are with me.”

But Davenport was persistent. “Well, I wouldn’t want you to buy something you might regret. Maybe you should come back when you have more bits and buy something better … more expensive, maybe?”

At this moment, no amount of anger management training could hold back Twilight’s rage.

“No, you’re going to point me to the cheapest stuff in the store, because between almost dooming an entire empire, nearly watching my assistant fall to his death, and fixing an uprooted library, I’ve had enough stress already!” Twilight was practically screaming at this point. Davenport, along with the rest of the town, knew all too well enough what Twilight was capable of when angry, so he backed off. His voice, which rarely ever faltered, had an unmistakable tone of apprehension.

“Um, of course, Ms. Sparkle.” He said, pointing a shaky hoof to another section of the shop. “The lower-quality items are over here. They’re usually a lot cheaper.”

Twilight smiled, the fire leaving her eyes. “Thank you.”

Davenport chuckled nervously, leading Twilight to the opposite corner of the room. “Some of the least expensive options are over here, but I wouldn’t compromise quality completely just for the sake of price.”

Letting the comment go in one ear and out the other, Twilight scanned the price tags. “How about this one?” she inquired, pointing a hoof at one of the simplest sofas in the store.

The salespony lifted a hoof as if to reject, but decided against it. “It’s your decision.”

Twilight continued looking for the price tag, but wasn’t able to find one.

“Well that’s strange. It must have fallen off,” the stallion reasoned. “But I can tell you that this sofa is 230 bits.”

“230 bits?” Twilight shouted. “Are you serious?!”

“Yes, I am.” Although he had been caught off guard by the librarian’s earlier outburst, Davenport managed to keep his usual stoic manner this time.

Rarity, who had heard Twilight shouting, came stomping in from the other room. She didn’t stop until she was practically nose-to-nose with Davenport, fixing him with a stare that could probably burn through most solid objects. Thankfully for the target of the glare, the deathray didn’t seem to work on ponies.

“Now you listen here. I will not sit idly by as you treat one of my friends that way!”

The stallion just smiled. “You know, you’re really sexy when you’re angry.”

Somehow, Rarity managed to look even more angry than the already was. Davenport just kept smirking. Meanwhile, Twilight was sitting off to the side, not sure if she should intervene, or if it would even be safe for her to do so.

“Excuse me, but I do not wish to be spoken to that way either!”

“If you want to get away from me so much, why are you sticking your face right up against mine?”

Rarity blinked, blushed, then backed away. It was clear that, one way or another, Rarity was going to lose this argument. Fortunately for Rarity, there are other ways of getter hew way without arguing.

“Oh well, if you want me to go away that badly, I guess I’ll be leaving, then. I’ll see you at the party, Twilight.”

“Um, Rarity, there’s no reason to leave. I was … I was just about to give Ms. Sparkle a … discount ... for being such a loyal customer.” From the way he grimaced at the thought of lowering his price, both the mares in the room could tell his true motives.

Turning back around, Rarity smiled. “That’s much better. Now, how much of a discount are we talking about here?”

Twilight, who had not spoken since Rarity had stepped in, now decided to dust off the ol’ vocal cords. “Rarity, I’m sure I can handle this by myself.”

“I’m sure you could darling, but a little assistance couldn’t hurt could it?” Emphasizing her point, she flicked her tail up into Davenport’s muzzle, leaving the stallion with a stupid grin on his face. “You might need it,” the fashionista added, arching her eyebrows.

“Point taken,” said the astute mare. “So, how low can we get the price? I still need to buy the other items after this.”

Davenport’s response was slowed, as his brain was still trying to process what Rarity had just done with her tail and what it meant. “Oh, I can sell you the items in a bundle, I suppose. Those are usually only certain combinations, but I think I can make another one this time.”

“Okay, so if I were to buy the sofa, the armchair, and five chairs, how much would that be?”

“My best guess would be 400 bits,” he answered, his gaze still following Rarity, who was casually looking at the chairs on the more expensive side of the store.

“I don’t have 400 bits. It’ll have to be lower.”

“I don’t think I can go any lower, Twilight Sparkle. I do have to make some money, after all, and I’m already losing enough profit as it is!”

“Davenport, are you going to Pinkie Pie’s party tonight?” Rarity asked, having made her way around the room.

The stallion didn’t react in the slightest. Despite his clear obsession with mares, there was one thing that was more important to him: profit.

“Can this wait a moment? I’m in the middle of business.”

“Humor me.”

“Yes, I am going to the party tonight,” he sighed, “but I don’t see what that has to do with anything.”

Rarity smiled slyly. “How about this: If you give Twilight the price she wants, I’ll let you take me out to the party.”

Davenport’s eyes widened. “Really. Oh, now this gets interesting, doesn't it?”

“Um, Rarity, you don’t have to do that for me,” Twilight interrupted, more than a hint of nervousness in her voice. “I’m sure I can just put in on layaway, right?”

“Trust me, you do not want to put anything he sells on layaway. You’ll end up paying a lot extra. And besides, I didn’t have any other plans for the party anyway.”

The stallion in the room was grinning ear to ear. “Well that’s good to hear, but how much of a discount are we talking about here?”

Both of them turned to Twilight, who was still a little intimidated by the situation. To say that romance was not her strong suit was an understatement. “Maybe … 300?”

Davenport’s smile suddenly went south, in a manner of speaking. “I’d be taking a loss at that price. I need to break even, or no deal.”

“How much would you need for that?” Rarity asked.

“three-fifty.”

“I only have three-hundred twenty-five bit,” commented Twilight, saying the full number out of habit.

“Well, I guess we can negotiate.” The salespony turned to Rarity. “Rarity has to agree to stay for the whole party, and actually try to enjoy herself.”

“No problem.”

“With the potential for a second date, as well.”

Rarity cringed just slightly, but kept to her element. “We’ll see.”

“Good enough for me. As for you, Twilight, I expect that you’ll pay me the difference at a later date, correct?”

“What kind of negotiation is this?” asked Rarity incredulously. “Do you really think you’re going to get everything your way?”

“Let’s not forget that my normal price is 100 bits more than what you’re paying. I’d say it’s pretty fair, considering.” Smiling, he hooked a foreleg around Rarity’s neck. “So, should I meet you at the party, or what?”

To her credit, Rarity took it all in stride. “Sure. I’ll be there a little after it starts.”

“Why not get there right off?” he asked.

“Well, I didn’t expect to be here so long, and it’ll take me some time to get ready. After all, a lady must look presentable.”

“I can’t argue with that. So, Twilight, do we have a deal?”

Twilight just chuckled and shook her head. “Sure.”

“Okay. I’ll get the cart and pull these over to the library, if you’d like.”

“Actually, I think I can handle it.” Without hesitation, Twilight’s horn glowed, enveloping a sofa, an armchair, and a hoofful of wooden chairs up into the air. She arranged this into single file, at the same time applying her magic to the wall, allowing the assorted furniture to pass right through it. By the time it was over, Davenport was almost a nervous wreck.

“I’m sure there was a less risky way for you to do that, Twilight Sparkle. You could’ve wrecked my shop.”

“Just my thanks for you being such a wonderful host,” said the unicorn.

It took Davenport a few seconds to get the joke, but when he did, he didn’t acknowledge it.

“I’ll see you at the party then, Ms. Sparkle.”

Twilight nodded. She departed the store, but just after leaving, walked back in.

“I almost forgot; I need to get some quills too.”

“Well, I have plenty of those. I’d assume that’s what you needed the other bits for?”

“Yes. I’ll come back for them later.” The magically talented mare left the shop once again. Trotting over to the pieces of furniture, she lifted them all in magical aura and started carrying them back to her house.


Meanwhile, Davenport and Rarity were still having a conversation. Although she did want to get prepared for the night’s festivities, Rarity figured she had some time to talk. Davenport, whose only preparation for the party would be a change out of his work suit, had plenty of time to kill.

At some point, the conversation got to the items he sold.

“I guess I just don’t understand why you sell Quills and Sofas. Wouldn’t it be more profitable to sell other things as well?”

“Actually, I do sell some other stuff.”

Rarity gazed at his skeptically. “Like what?”

Grinning ear to ear, Davenport produced a gelatinous mass from under the counter.

“Like GAK!!”

In My Eyes

View Online

First Hand Account of Lieutenant Forrest Dew, Trottingham Company, 2nd Unicorn Battalion, as printed in “The Two Year Standoff: A History”.
7 Weeks Before The Revolution


I caught first sight of the royal castle just as the sun rose. It had been three day’s journey from the front lines, and every joint and muscle in my body felt ready to give. As glad as I was to be away from the front lines, the strain on my body had made the trip more or an ordeal than a vacation. For the sake of speed, I’d left with minimal provisions: a few canteens of water and enough food for two small meals a day.

Now that the city was in sight, I gained back some of the energy I’d lost. I was only an hour outside the city. When compared to the rest of my journey, this small stretch was a walk in the park. I continued along at a brisk pace, and reached the city just as the sun cleared the horizon. Off in the distance, I could see the outline of Canterlot in the light. It was the greatest wonder of Equestria, even more magnificent than the royal palace. It seemed that every other weeks there was a new petition to make Canterlot the capital, all of which the princesses ignored. For some reason, they seemed to prefer their palace by the woods.

But who was I to judge the will of the Princesses? Surely they had their reasons, and at the moment I didn’t particularly care which castle I was heading to so long as it was warm and had food inside.

After another hour or so, I arrived at the castle gates. I knocked and the doors opened wide. After a short conversation with the gatekeeper I was allowed access. The wall was brightly lit by both torchlight and enchantment. The hall was grand in scale, covered with colorful tapestries and oil paintings. A chandelier hung from the center, and across the room sat two thrones, both of which were unoccupied.

Knowing that the princesses must be busy, I allowed myself to explore the hall. Though not as richly decorated as the state buildings in Canterlot, the room was nonetheless a sight to behold. The thrones were the most amazing of all. One was made of white marble, covered with a twisting lattice of gold formed in the pattern of a sun. The other was made of a shiny black rock, probably Obsidian, and decorated with silver plating in the shape of the moon. Though both were similar, I could’ve sworn the white one was a bit larger.

A voice from behind me broke my focus. “What news from the front lines?”

In a frenzy, I turned around to see none other than the princess of the night herself. I quickly saluted and stood at attention, trying not to let my surprise show. I’d never meet of even seen either of the princesses in person.

“Is there any news?”

My nerves got the better of me, causing me to fumble over my words. Eventually, I managed to put together a sentence. “General Nimbus sent me with news for both you and Princess Celestia, ma’am.”

The princess rolled her eyes, clearly annoyed. “Celestia is asleep at the moment. I will relay the news to her as soon as she is awake.”

“Yes ma’am.” I replied, collecting myself. She was just another superior, whether or not she was a princess was irrelevant.

“The general wishes to report that the griffons have made further advances and are now camped directly on the opposite side of the river. We have also intercepted at least one scout flying over our camp, but other than that they have made no actions against us.”

Luna sighed, circling around to her throne. “So the standoff continues for another month. How long has it been now?”

“Seven weeks short of two years, ma’am.”

“That is a shame,” she said. Her empathy seemed genuine, at least to me. “How long have you been stationed there?”

“Since the beginning of the standoff, ma’am.”

Luna shook her head, walking over to a large stained glass window. The moon reflected in it, giving the surrounding glass a slight glow.

“Do you have a family, soldier?”

I wasn’t sure what to say to this. It certainly wasn’t the type of question I expected to hear from a princess. At that moment, I remembered what I’d been taught at the academy: Whatever they say, treat it like an order, and you can’t go wrong

“I have a wife and a daughter. They live in Trottingham.”

Luna looked back at me with a look of sympathy. “That is so much to give up for so little. I truly am sorry, and I do hope that you’ll be home soon.”

I wanted to say that I agreed with the princess, but her words almost seemed like a trap. If she didn’t agree with it, why didn’t she just call us back home? It all seemed very contradictory.

“You seem quite tired. Why wasn’t a pegasus sent to deliver this message?”

That was a question I’d asked myself many times on my trip, even though I knew the answer. “There were concerns that if we sent any more pegasi up in the air, there could be a fight, and command wants to avoid confrontation for as long as possible.”

The princess nodded. “That does make sense, I suppose. It must have been a long trip, though. You’d look like you need a meal and some rest. I’m sure the guardsmen would allow you to stay in the barracks if you asked one of them.”

Somehow I managed to mask my elation. “Yes, ma’am. Thank you ma’am.” Snapping into a salute one again, I turned around and headed to speak to the guard I’d seen at the gate earlier.

I never did look back at Luna, but if I had, I’d like to think she was smiling.