Discord has to foalsit Diamond Tiara when Fluttershy can't make it. Chaos ensues.
Fluttershy is unable to make it to her job foalsitting Diamond Tiara when Angel contracts the flu, and asks Discord to take her place while she takes care of him. And when the God of Chaos and a complete spoiled brat of a filly are under the same roof, the two are bound to get into quite a few...disagreements.
5/04/14: OMG this got FEATURED?! THANK YOU ALL SO MUCH!
“Goodbye, Diamond, I’ll be back on Monday night. And please, try not to give Ms. Fluttershy any trouble when she gets here.” Filthy Rich said to his daughter before trotting out of the mansion and shutting the door behind him.
Diamond Tiara scrunched up her face and let out an angry groan.
“I DON’T need a foalsitter I said. I can take care of myself just fine I said. But does he ever listen? Noooo.” She grumbled to nopony in particular.
She walked up the stairs to her room, still lost in her own, angry thoughts.
“Oh well. At least I have a couple minutes to myself before she gets here. And Fluttershy’s a total pushover anyway. It’s not like she’s going to give me any REAL trouble.” She said.
Diamond made it to her room and sat herself down in front her rather expensive looking mirror and started brushing her mane. Diamond Tiara’s bedroom was pretty much the thing that defined every stereotype about fillies her age. Teddy bears covering her gigantic bed, Neon Lights posters everywhere, a picture of Applebloom on a dartboard engulfed in darts (okay, not so fillylike there), and everything, I repeat EVERYTHING, was pink. If it wasn’t obvious before that she was a stuck-up, spoiled little brat, it would be now if you saw it for yourself.
“I don’t know. Maybe if I can get Silver Spoon to come here for the weekend things won’t be so bad, just as long as Fluttershy doesn’t get in my way.” She said.
Diamond sat in front of her mirror, admiring the unbearable cuteness of her face’s reflection. She had pretty much convinced herself that she was absolute perfection. Her dazzling pink and white mane, the sparkle of her tiara, her bright yellow eyes, a completely flawless smile…
“…Wait what?! Yellow eyes?!” Diamond exclaimed, snapping out of her trance.
After coming back to reality, Diamond realized her reflection had been REALLY messed up. Her eyes had been turned completely yellow with red pupils, both with different sizes, and it smiled devilishly back at her.
“Hehehehe. SURPRISE!” It shouted in a voice that was most definitely NOT hers.
Diamond fell off her chair in shock, and lay on the floor looking at the twisted version of herself in the mirror, looking quite scared. The pony in the mirror backed up a bit, ran in her direction, and jumped right out of the mirror. But what came out didn’t even remotely resemble a pony. It had the same yellow eyes and all, but it was way too tall and had the body parts of a ton of different animals. It stood up from it’s crouching position on the floor, raised it’s head up and let out a maniacal laugh.
“Mwahahahaha! That look on your face! Hilarious!” Discord laughed.
Diamond recovered from Discord’s cheap jumpscare and gave him a major death glare.
“Oh it’s you. What are you doing in my house loser?” She asked rather rudely.
Discord didn’t care much for this filly’s bad attitude, and only chuckled.
“Oh now isn’t that just precious? The snobby little filly thinks she’s better than me just because her daddy’s worth more than the combined income of Ponyville. It’s just too cute!” Discord chuckled, pinching the filly’s cheek.
After Discord let go, Diamond rubbed her sore cheek with her hoof, still giving that angry look.
“You didn’t answer my question you jerk. Why the hay is a freak like you in my home?” She growled.
Again, Discord found himself not being able to take the little brat seriously, but decided to go ahead and humor her.
“Well the answer to that question is quite simple my little pony. I’ve been assigned to look after a certain little filly. Tell me, does a miss Diamond Tiara live here?” He asked with a hint of fake ignorance on the matter.
Discord had been doing a pretty good job at getting on Diamond’s nerves, and it showed…a lot.
“Yeah, she’s me. But Fluttershy was supposed to foalsit here! What the hay did you do to her?!” Diamond yelled.
Discord looked pretty uninterested in the filly’s yelling, as he had just been laying in a reclining position in the air and let out a loud yawn, waving his lion paw in front of his mouth.
“Oh fine, I suppose you deserve an explanation. You see, this is what happened…”
Fluttershy had just come back into her cottage after feeding her chickens, when she heard what sounded like barfing coming from the bathroom.
“Oh my. That doesn’t sound good.” She said.
She walked over to the bathroom door and gave it a knock.
“Angel? Angel Bunny are you alright?” she asked nicely.
At that moment, the sound of a toilet flushing could be heard, and the door opened, revealing a very sick looking rabbit. His face had turned a dark green, his whiskers looked disheveled and unkempt, and he had bags under his eyes.
Fluttershy gasped at seeing Angel looking so sick.
“Angel! Oh you poor thing you look terrible!” Fluttershy cried.
Angel gave a glare that communicated ‘Yeah. I’ve noticed.’, and let out a very loud sneeze. A trickle of snot dripped from his twitching nose, prompting him to suck it back in.
Fluttershy scooped the rabbit in her hooves and flew him into his bed, and put a hoof on his forehead.
“Oh my, you’re burning up! Don’t worry honey, I’ll take care of you.” She said.
Suddenly in a bright flash of white light, Discord appeared by Angel’s bedside wearing a nurse’s outfit. He scanned his eyeballs across the tiny rabbit’s figure, stuck a thermometer into his mouth, causing the mercury to rise, and the end to completely shatter.
“Hmmm. In my professional opinion…this guy’s sick as all heck.” Discord pointed out the obvious.
Fluttershy gave her chaotic roommate an unamused stare.
“Hey, I’m only telling the truth.” Discord said shrugging his shoulders.
“I know, and it’s really sweet of you to try and help and everything but…” Fluttershy sighed.
Another flash of light ensued, and Discord appeared behind Fluttershy, holding her shoulders, now minus the nurse uniform.
“Awww what’s wrong Fluttershy?” Discord asked.
“Well, it’s just that, I had to foalsit for Mr. Rich for the weekend, but now that Angel’s sick, there’s no way I can leave the house.” She said sadly.
Discord cocked one of his big, white eyebrows.
“Soooo what? Just cancel it. It’s no big deal. Foalsitters cancel all the time.” He said.
Fluttershy shook her head.
“I couldn’t cancel on such short notice. I’d sound so rude doing that…Oh but I can’t just leave Angel like this. What am I going to do?” she sadly asked herself.
After a few moments, Fluttershy’s ears perked up, and she looked up at Discord with a huge grin.
“Fluttershy, what’re you giving me that…..No way.” Discord was able to tell what she was thinking almost immediately.
“Pleeeeease Discord? Can you watch Mr. Rich’s daughter for a few days for me?” Fluttershy pleaded.
“Fluttershy, I am the God of Chaos for Celestia’s sake, I have a reputation to live up to! Besides, that title doesn’t exactly speak foalsitter to well does it?” Discord said.
Fluttershy wouldn’t let up though.
“Pleasepleasepleaseplease?” she asked
Discord turned his back and crossed his arms.
“No. I don’t wanna.” Discord wasn’t budging.
Fluttershy was running out of options. Nopony else was free for the weekend, Discord was acting like an immovable wall, and all rational ways to deal with this problem have failed. Fluttershy knew that her signature stare didn’t work on Discord, but she did have SOMETHING that did work. Whenever she needed something from anypony immune to “The Stare”, she had to resort to her secret weapon.
Fluttershy’s ace in the hole…
Overwhelming cuteness.
Discord noticed the face Fluttershy was giving him and winced.
“You can give me that look all you want Fluttershy, but my decision stands firm.” He said.
“…”
“...You’re gonna have to stop sometime.”
“…”
“…Seriously Fluttershy, cut it out.”
“…”
“…..Gaaaaargh! Alright fine! I’ll watch the kid okay?! Just stop looking at me like that! You happy now!?” Discord yelled in defeat.
Fluttershy’s tears immediately sucked back into her eyes, and a smile returned to her face.
“Thank you Discord.” She said cheerily, returning to Angel’s bed to look after him. As she did that, Discord came to a sudden realization.
‘Wait…was I just outsmarted by Fluttershy?’ he thought to himself…
“She ditched me for a RABBIT?!” Diamond yelled in utter disbelief. Discord resumed laughing.
“Kind of a negative way of looking at it, but pretty much yeah.” Discord chuckled.
Diamond Tiara’s eyebrows narrowed and her face was still in a scowl.
“I guess if her dumb pet is sick then it’s a little understandable. A little. But she couldn’t have at least sent somepony less…I don’t know…UGLY?!” Diamond shouted.
“Hey you’re no prize yourself, sister. I swear my head is spinning from all that darn perfume you’re wearing.” Discord said, and he meant that literally, because the second he caught wind of it, his head spun rapidly all the way around his neck.
“Hey, I smell fantastic! I’ll have you know that my daddy buys me the most divine and expensive fragrances known to ponykind!” Diamond yelled.
Discord put his eagle talons to his face.
“Oh what have I gotten myself into?...We’re getting a tad off track here Ms. Tiara. The point is-“ Discord snapped his talons, disappeared, and reappeared next to the filly, now wearing a Mary Poppins outfit.
“The point is that I’m in charge of you while your dad’s away. And until he gets back, you’re stuck with me…so you better get used to it. And who knows, you may learn to enjoy it, what with my nutty powers of Chaos and all.” Discord said, drumming his fingers together with an evil smile on his face.
Discord once again, snapped his fingers and disappeared. Across the hallway, Diamond heard the sound of the toilet in the bathroom flushing, followed by a loud explosion.
“Whoops…Ummm Diamond? I think somepony may have flooded your uhh…you know…entire bathroom.” Discord shouted from the other side.
Diamond facehooved at her new foalsitter’s lame excuse.
It was Diamond Tiara’s first night of being under Discord’s care, most of which had been spent with the two of them sitting on opposite couches in the living room, with Diamond giving Discord the stink-eye. Discord was constantly snapping his talons which caused several of Filthy Rich’s self-portraits to depict him in some sort of dumb outfit.
Eventually, Discord noticed the scowl Diamond was showing off and spoke up.
“Well that’s not a happy face. What’s the matter? Don’t trust me?” Discord sneered.
Diamond didn’t say anything, but continued giving Discord the same look of suspiciousness.
“…Riiiight, dumb question. Say, shouldn’t you be taking a bath right about now?” Discord asked.
Diamond got up from the couch.
“Yeah. But I’m telling you right now, don’t try anything funny. I only have to put up with you for two days, so just stay out of my way, and we won’t have a problem.” Diamond growled.
Discord chuckled again, and put up his paw.
“Whatever you say, oh lord of the spoiled and bratty.” Discord said giving a mock bow.
“I’M NOT A BRAT!” Diamond yelled.
Discord suddenly appeared behind the little filly and gave her mane a noogie.
“Not a brat? Bwahahaha!...kid, that’s like the brat’s motto.” Discord laughed.
Diamond still had that death glare on her face, but her cheeks were puffed out and red in a way that looked rather adorable.
“Oh whatever! I’m taking my shower now! Don’t bother me!” She shouted before heading to the bathroom.
Once Diamond was out of earshot, Discord plopped himself back on the couch and let out an exhausted sigh.
“Uggh, great. Fluttershy didn’t tell me she was one of THOSE foals. Pfft. Kids these days. Don’t know how to respect their elders. She seriously needs to learn her place.” Discord grumbled to himself.
Just then, a lightbulb appeared above Discord’s head, and a mischievous smile grew onto his face.
“Learn her place…hehehehehehe. Methinks I have an idea.” Discord chuckled, removing the lightbulb from above his head, and swallowing it whole, which caused light to come from his eyes, nostrils, and ears for a few seconds.
Discord got up and teleported next to the bathroom door, which had an intense amount of steam coming out from under it, and the sounds of Diamond cursing Discord’s name under her breath could be heard from inside. Discord snickered at the sound of the filly’s frustration, and snapped his talons. The sound of running water stopped, and the steam ceased.
“What the-“ Diamond had been cut off mid-sentence by the sound of another running liquid, which was followed by her own screaming. Discord did his best to contain a laugh, holding his paw in front of his mouth to hold it in.
And then, absolute silence for a full 10 seconds…
…Which was then broken when the door flew open, revealing a very angry Diamond Tiara, covered head to hoof in melted cheese.
“Care to explain?!” She yelled.
Discord shrugged his shoulders.
“What? I haven’t done anything.” Discord lied, wearing quite the obvious smirk.
“Really?! Then why was my shower head spewing out CHEESE?!” Diamond screamed.
“Hey, what you rich types choose to bathe in is none of my business.” Discord said.
Diamond realized it was pretty much pointless trying to get the truth out of him, and just retreated back into the bathroom, slamming the door behind her.
Upon witnessing the filly’s reaction, Discord couldn’t hold it in anymore and started laughing like crazy.
“Bwahahahaha! Been trollin’ ponies like a boss for a thousand years, and still goin’ strong! Sometimes I just kill myself!” Discord howled.
Once Discord got done with his laughing fit, an overwhelming feeling came over him…sleepiness. He let out a huge yawn, made his way to Filthy Rich’s bedroom.
“I’ll admit that was pretty funny, but dealing with HER for a whole two days? Something tells me this isn’t worth even half of what Filthy's paying...hehehe. Filthy.” Discord said to himself.
Though, those thoughts ceased when he arrived in the bedroom, and saw Filthy’s bed. To say the least, the thing was gigantic. The mattress was so huge, it looked like it could hold an Ursa Major, but at the same time, it looked astoundingly fluffy and comfortable.
Discord nodded his head in approval. After being encased in stone for so long, everything looked more comfortable than that. Heck, he’d take sleeping on a bed of nails over staying in the same position for a thousand years and being a public restroom for the birds any day. But he wasn’t quite used to THIS type of luxury.
In other words, Fluttershy’s couch had nothing on this.
“I spoke too soon. Totally worth it.” Discord said, throwing himself onto the bed, and prepared to sleep.
Discord snapped his fingers, and one of the pillows was engulfed in brightness, and now in its place, was a pink, overly furry pony, with its tongue hanging out.
Discord laid his head on top of it, which caused the pony to squeak. It started squirming and wriggling to try and get itself out from under Discord’s head.
Discord opened one eye, snapped his fingers, and the pony immediately stopped moving. Its eyes closed, and it started to snore.
“Fluffle Puff is best pillow.” Discord chuckled to himself as he himself drifted off to sleep…
Diamond Tiara got out of the bathroom with a towel wrapped around her mane, this time completely free of any cheese on her. Even though, she was still pretty miffed.
“The nerve of that jerk! Getting me dirty and then lying to my face! Dad’s SO gonna hear about this when he gets back!” Diamond said to herself, at the same time using another towel to dry herself off.
“And Fluttershy. Her dumb rabbit picked the perfect time to get sick, didn’t he? I could just be doing whatever I please right now because Fluttershy’s too big a wuss to do anything about it, but nooo. I get stuck with the eternal troll instead. Awesome.”
Diamond shook her head and sighed.
“Keep it together Tiara. You only have to put up with Discord for two days. After that, he’ll have no reason to go anywhere near you ever again. You can get through this.” She assured herself.
She was about to head back to her room, when she remembered something she had heard from the newspapers about Discord…
He had this whole, weird ability to mind control ponies or something, also turning them grey. Diamond knew that Discord technically wasn’t supposed to be evil anymore, but after experiencing what Discord had done earlier, she wasn’t taking any chances.
She went into the kitchen for a few minutes, folded herself a tinfoil hat, and slept wearing it that night.
‘I’d like to see you try to get in my head now.’ She smugly thought to herself…
Diamond’s stomach had woken her up the next morning. The loud growl of her hunger had jolted her awake, and upon doing so, was happy to see that her brain had not been turned to jelly from any of Discord’s mind tricks.
“Discord! Discord, where the hay are you?!” Diamond shouted, causing her voice to echo through the empty halls of the mansion.
Diamond checked nearly every room, but couldn’t find her foalsitter anywhere. At this point, she was pretty much starving, so she would need to find him soon, if she was to get breakfast.
She finally managed to find Discord in the pool room, laying down in the hot-tub which had been filled with some sort of boiling hot, black liquid, and had cucumbers over his eyes.
Discord heard the entrance of the filly, and his tongue shot out of his mouth, reached up to his eyes, and slurped both the cucumbers into his maw.
“Morning. I’ll tell you what kid, you’re family sure knows how to live. I could seriously get used to this.” Discord said.
Diamond narrowed her eyes.
“Well don’t. You’re only staying till Monday, then I get to throw your mix-matched butt out of-“ Diamond stopped for a second, noticing the strange smell in the air.
“…Are you…hot-tubbing in…tar?” She asked.
Discord looked at the contents of the hot-tub, with a look of sarcastic realization on his face.
“Huh. I Guess I am.” He said as if it didn’t matter.
Diamond looked very confused for a bit, but shook it off when she was reminded of the growling in her stomach.
“I’m hungry.” Diamond said.
“And this is my problem how?” Discord asked.
Just talking to Discord made Diamond angrier by the second.
“You’re supposed to feed me!” Diamond yelled.
Discord slapped his paw to his forehead.
“Uuuugh. Fine. If it’ll get you to be quiet quicker, I’ll go get breakfast started.” Discord said as he got out of the hot-tub and conjuring a towel to cover his midriff. He then snapped his fingers and disappeared, presumably into the kitchen.
Diamond took a moment to look at the condition of the hot-tub.
“Darn it, we just had that thing cleaned too!” She shouted.
After few minutes of waiting at the table, Discord had gotten a plate of pancakes to Diamond, who looked at it with a little suspicion, and Discord took notice.
“Still don’t trust me huh? Can’t exactly say I blame you.” Discord said with a smirk. Diamond ignored him and continued to observe the pancakes, still quite paranoid.
“What’d you do to it?” She asked.
Discord rolled his eyes.
“Oh come on now. I would never feed you anything that would make you sick. Can you at least pretend to trust me?” Discord said, giving her a puppy-dog-eyes look.
Diamond still knew Discord wasn’t very trustworthy, but she wouldn’t be able to question it, as she was seriously hungry by now. She picked up a fork, stuck it into the stack, and…
BOOM!
Apparently, the pancakes had blown up the second Diamond stuck her fork into them, because the whole kitchen had been engulfed in smoke, and Diamond’s mane had been blown back and covered in soot. She gave quite the unamused glare to the draconequus.
“…I never said they wouldn't explode.” Discord chuckled.
Diamond didn't find the situation as funny.
“Do you have any idea how hard it is to keep my mane looking pretty?! You try keeping this thing tame with just hair spray; IT DOESN'T WORK!” She yelled, pointing at her soot-coated hair.
Discord teleported next to Diamond, and patted her head.
“Awww. Did I make wittle Diamond angwy?” Discord asked in baby-talk.
Discord’s smart remarks were really starting to get to Diamond. Even when she is constantly screaming at him, it seems all Discord can do is laugh, and it’s driving her crazy.
He snapped his fingers, and another plate of pancakes appeared in front of Diamond.
“Seriously though, you should probably get to eating. Can’t exactly leave the wittle pwincess with an empty stomach now can we?” Discord said, again with the degrading baby-talk.
“I swear if this explodes, you will face my wrath.” Diamond grumbled. It’s hard for her to see when Discord is being sincere, and when he’s just being a jerk.
‘Urrgh! Why’s he have to be so confusing?!’ Diamond thought to herself, taking a bite out of the pancakes, this time with no explosion.
Discord clasped his hands together and gave a satisfied grin. He teleported to the other side of the room, now wearing a full set of workout gear and holding a water bottle in his lion hand.
“Okaaaay then. If you need me, I'll be on the treadmill in the other room. Oh and do me a favor…” Discord stretched his neck across the room, to the point where his head was right in front of Diamond’s face.
“…Don’t need me.” Discord said before teleporting out of the room.
Diamond managed to just finish her breakfast when the doorbell rang, letting out a loud chime throughout the main hall. Seeing that Discord wasn’t exactly going out of his way to get off the exercise equipment to answer the door, Diamond groaned and got up to get it herself. She opened the door, revealing her friend Silver Spoon drinking a soda.
“Morning Diamond, how’re you-PFFFFFT!” Upon seeing the current state of Diamond’s mane, Silver Spoon had done a huge spit take.
“Wow…uhhhh, sheesh Diamond. I know you’ve had bedhead before, but just…what?” Silver stuttered.
In an attempt to tame the horrendously atrocious beast that was Diamond’s mane, Silver Spoon was in her room with her, brushing her mane back into its regular fashion, while Diamond sat at her desk angrily drawing something with a crayon. Silver Spoon looked over her shoulder and noticed she had been using an obscene amount of red. She was going to question why…
Until she saw what Diamond was drawing.
“Ummm Diamond?” Silver Spoon asked.
“What?”
“Any particular reason you’re drawing Discord getting mauled by a bear?”
Diamond’s grip on the crayon in her mouth tightened.
“You mean other than the fact that he’s the one who ruined my gorgeous mane?” Diamond retorted.
“Okay, so Discord’s a jerk. What else is new? Could you really expect anything more from a former evil God of Chaos?” Silver Spoon asked.
Diamond rolled her eyes.
“I guess not. But does he even realize who I am?! If Daddy found out Discord was treating his princess like this, he’d-“
Silver Spoon raised a hoof.
“Diamond, you’re looking at Discord as if he’s just a mean foalsitter. He’d probably just turn your dad into a duck if he wanted to. I hate to break it to you, but Discord is practically untouchable.” Silver Spoon explained.
The truth hit Diamond like a ton of bricks. This is one situation that her dad’s money can’t get her out of. She was stuck with Discord until her dad returned in two days, and there was literally nothing she could do but take it and occasionally vent out her frustration.
“Oh dear Celestia. I’ll never make it.” Diamond mumbled, her pupils shrinking to the size of pinpricks.
Silver Spoon gently patted her friend’s shoulder.
“Just relax alright? Look, I’ll stay over here until Discord leaves and help you through this. At least then you don’t have to suffer alone.” Silver Spoon said, trying to reassure here.
“…A-Alright. If Discord messes with one of us, he’s gonna have to face BOTH of us!” Diamond shouted.
All of a sudden, both Diamond and Silver Spoon heard the sound of Discord’s cackling laughter fill the room.
“Hehehehe. Oh don’t worry about that Diamond Tiara. Dealing with you AND your little minion won’t be any trouble on my part…don’t know if I can say the same for you though.” Discord laughed.
Then, the crude drawing of Discord getting eaten by a bear Diamond had been working on came to life and immediately started to scream and groan in fake pain.
“Augggh! Oooggh! Oh that hurts so terribly!...not. Really Diamond? Is it really appropriate for a filly to be drawing something so gruesome?” the scribbled Discord teased as he teleported out of the bear’s mouth.
Diamond scowled intensely.
“I thought you said you were going to leave me alone.” Diamond hissed.
Discord seemed to be a little more interested in his poorly drawn hand than this conversation.
“Oh silly filly, I simply told you to not get on my nerves. Nothing EVER said I couldn’t wear on yours.” Discord said as he snapped his talons, which made the scribbled bear come to life and shoot off the paper and tower over the two fillies, who were now holding onto each other as tightly as possible and were shaking while the bear snarled and growled with drool dripping from its gaping maw.
Just when it looked like the beast was going to chomp on these ponies, it halted…And immediately started to laugh in Discord’s voice.
“Hahahahahaha! Look at yourselves! You were all “Oh no, it’s gonna eat us! Hilarious! You’re extra fun to tease Diamond Tiara!” it laughed. The bear then reached for a zipper at the top of his head and unzipped himself, revealing Discord in the flesh standing before the two of them as the scribbly bear suit fell to the ground.
“That was NOT funny you jerk!” Silver Spoon shouted.
“Yeah, what the heck Discord?! You almost gave me a heart attack! I thought I was going to be eaten!” Diamond yelled.
Discord folded up the suit, and threw it over his shoulder, and in a puff of pink smoke, it turned into a swarm of blue bats which flew into Silver Spoon’s face making her yell and scream as Discord laughed.
“Aaaaugh! Aaaaugh! Get em’ off! Get em’ off! There’re getting in my mane!” Silver screamed before they flew out of the door to Celestia knows where else in the large mansion, leaving a very annoyed and frizzy maned Silver Spoon, as well as a still quite angry Diamond Tiara.
“Stop it Discord! Trolling other ponies is NOT funny!” Diamond yelled.
That statement alone made Discord put on his best “You’ve got to be kidding me” face.
“…Oh yes, because you’re SOOOO much better. Tell me Diamond, does the insult “Blank Flank” mean anything to you?” Discord asked.
Diamond’s scowl hardened.
“That’s different! It’s only funny when it happens to somepony else!”
Discord facepawed.
“…No. I can’t even make fun of that. It’s too easy…” Discord groaned.
“Think what you want Discord, I really don’t care what a mixed freak like you thinks of me. Silver Spoon, let’s go to Sugarcube Corner and get some ice cream. I think I need some relief from this headache this loser is causing.” Diamond said.
“Yeah let’s go. I think I need an ice cream...and to be as far away from HIM as physically possible.” Silver Spoon said, trotting out the door of Diamond’s bedroom, leaving Discord by himself.
“Woooow. What a hypocrite. She gets on me about messing with ponies, but she does almost the EXACT SAME THING.” Discord huffed.
Discord then put a finger to his chin, thinking about what he could do next.
“Hmmm…Ooooh, I know JUST what to do.” Discord snickered as he floated to the window and saw Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon in the front yard, trotting to Sugarcube Corner.
“If I had to guess, they’re going to end up harassing whatever filly is unfortunate enough to cross their path, probably a blank flank…so what say they get a taste of their own medicine?” Discord asked nopony in particular as he snapped his lion fingers…
Diamond stomped through town with Silver Spoon by her side sporting probably the angriest look she had ever worn in her life on her face. Silver Spoon could practically feel the heat radiating from her friend’s rage, and it unnerved her a little. She’d seen Diamond angry plenty of times, but this was on a totally different level. She must’ve felt completely powerless at the claws of Discord; and when you are usually the one on top, that feeling could tend not to sit well.
“Rrrrgh, of all the foalsitters in all of Equestria, I just HAD to get set up with HIM!” Diamond growled the final word through her teeth as she started to grind them in anger.
“I know Diamond, I know he’s horrible; but I’m sort of at a loss here. We’re foals, we can’t match up to his kind of power. Best we can do right now is just suck it up, wait till your dad gets back, and then you won’t have to deal with Discord ever again...” Silver Spoon responded.
Diamond turned around and gave Silver Spoon a slightly cold stare that probably said something along the lines of “Silvs, I love you and everything, but be quiet”
“Silver, when I come home, Discord’ll probably have turned the entire mansion completely upside down. And exactly whose fault do you think it’s going to be when dad gets back and finds the toilet on the ceiling, or maybe the litterbox coming to life and trying to eat my cat?” Diamond asked. The sheer ridiculousness of this statement was nearly enough to make Silver facehoof, but she instead settled on a slight deadpan.
“…Diamond, I’m pretty sure your dad knows you are completely incapable of pulling something like that off.” she said, stating the very obvious. It was becoming very apparent that Diamond was so angry that she wasn’t quite all there.
“…Well you’re right, I guess…that still doesn’t excuse the fact that I’m stuck with Discord for two more days though." Diamond groaned, rubbing her temples with her hooves. To her, Discord was like headaches incarnate, and this morning wasn’t really helping.
“Look, it’s only two days with a God of Chaos….Maaaybe if you two got on better terms he’d leave you alone?” Silver suggested.
“…Silver, are you seriously suggesting that I try to make FRIENDS with DISCORD?!” Diamond practically yelled. At this point her eyes had widened and her jaw had completely dropped. She could not believe the absurd suggestion that had entered her ears.
Despite the shocked look on her friend’s face and the volume of her voice, Silver Spoon’s face didn’t change. “If you’ve got a better idea, I’d love to hear it…” Silver Spoon retorted with little emotion.
Diamond growled to herself and cursed Discord’s name under her breath. “…Wow I hate this situation so much…” Diamond was about to offer another possible suggestion to Silver Spoon on the subject of dealing with Discord, when she noticed a small flicker of light from the corner of her eye, catching her attention.
“Hm?” Diamond craned her neck around to see around Silver Spoon’s body where the light had come from. Oddly enough, she found Silver Spoon doing the same with a rather confused look on her face.
“…Diamond, you saw that little flash of light too didn’t you?”
“Uh-huh….”
Both fillies finally got their heads into the view of where the light had come from and looked at the other’s flank where the oddity had transpired…
Only to find their flanks were left completely blank.
Both fillies’ eyes widened as they laid eyes on their friend’s markless flank and they let out a scream of horror in unison.
“YOUR CUTIE MARK!” They yelled at the same time. The fillies then took a look at their own flanks to see what the other was talking about, only to see that their cutie mark was gone too. “MY CUTIE MARK! AAAAAAH!” Both of them screamed again. It was no surprise that their screaming had garnered the attention of a few ponies nearby.
Diamond tensed up at feeling their gaze, hoping to Celestia that they wouldn’t notice the embarrassing predicament that she and Silver were in. Just as a precaution though, both fillies stood back-to-back and flank-to-flank to obscure the public’s view of their lack of cutie-marks.
“W-What the heck happened? Where did our cutie-marks go?!” Silver yelled through her teeth so she didn’t get attract anymore unwanted attention from Ponyville’s citizens.
“I’m not a hundred percent on this Silvs, but I’m pretty sure that the name of the one who’s responsible for this both starts and ends with the letter “D” and their inconsistent body parts would make a OCD stricken pony want to tear out their mane…”
Before either filly had a chance to utter another word, they heard a slight snicker coming from nearby. They turned around quickly, deathly afraid that somepony had spotted them without their cutie-marks, only to see that somepony indeed had.
Not far from them, there was a grey unicorn colt with a black mane that was in the style of a Mohawk that didn’t appear to be too far from their age. He had a hoof glued over his mouth in a very nearly futile attempt to stop himself from laughing at the fillies’ issue.
“Hey! Don’t laugh at us! We just had our cutie-marks taken away!” Diamond yelled at him.
The colt only snickered a little more before answering in a VERY familiar voice. “Ooooh, I am more than aware of your little problem, Diamond Tiara~” he chuckled with a slight smirk. His eyes then turned a very bright shade of yellow and his pupils to red. Afterwards, a single fang protruded itself from his mouth.
“…Discord.” Diamond said with narrowed eyes glaring at him.
“…Oh what gave it away? Was it the Mohawk?” the draconequus-turned-colt said as he ran a hoof through his mane with a questioning look on his face.
“…Wait, why the heck would you turn yourself into a colt? Isn’t being all made from different animals…I don’t know…more to your nature or something?” Silver Spoon asked. Discord didn’t respond right away, but instead teleported next to them and put a foreleg around Silver Spoon’s shoulder.
“Well, you know what they say about never letting go of your inner child~” Discord snickered. “Besides, ponies tend to not really take the sight of me all that well. Running, screaming, possibly pitchforks and torches. You know how it is. Can’t imagine what on Equestria for though.” Discord said, scratching his chin with a hoof.
“…Yeah, it’s a real mystery.” Silver Spoon said sarcastically to herself.
“Alright, enough joking around Discord! What did you do with our cutie-marks?!” Diamond yelled, getting straight in his face to the point of touching noses with nothing but a look of complete rage upon her.
“Yeesh, personal space please?” Discord asked. He then summoned a bit of magic with his unicorn horn to pull Diamond away from him by the tail.
“Hey! Stop that! Don’t touch my tail!” Diamond continued to yell.
Discord put his hooves to his ears and cringed a little at the sound of Diamond’s overly loud and high pitched yelling. “Ugh, your voice is like claws scratching a chalkboard while the chalkboard screams in agony.” He groaned. Discord then went back to stroking his chin with one of his new hooves. “Hmmm, let me see now. Cutie-marks, cutie-marks…oh you don’t mean THESE do you?~” Discord then turned his body around to show off his flanks, which to the fillies’ surprise, adorned their cutie-marks; Diamond’s on one side of his body, and Silver’s on the other.
“Give those back! We need those!” Silver Spoon yelled at him in a similar way to Diamond.
Discord only snickered a little at the filly’s demand. “Don’t worry, I’m not THAT cruel. You’ll get them back soon…but first , I would like to play a game~” Discord said with an ever growing smirk.
Diamond and Silver looked uncomfortably at each other at the prospect of this. Discord had their cutie-marks, and from the looks of it, they’d need to meet his demands if he’d be willing to give them back. The silence lasted for quite a while before finally Diamond spoke up. “…What kind of game are you talking?”
Discord then teleported himself in between the two fillies, making them flinch a little in fright. “Quite simple actually. I know aaaall about how you just love making fun of those that have no cutie mark, sooo I would like to see how you fare under similar conditions…Now, here’s how the game works. If you can stand the rest of the day without your cutie-marks AND without coming to me to beg for them back before sunset, then you shall be blank flanks no longer. Sound like fun?~” Discord sneered as he tapped his hooves together with a seemingly evil grin on his face.
Diamond and Silver exchanged a few glances after hearing the rules of said game. “…That actually sounds like the opposite of fun, but…you promise to end this whole charade at sunset?” Diamond asked suspiciously. She wouldn’t really put it past Discord to turn the rules of this game against them, but their options were not very many right now.
“Heehee, cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye!” Discord said, going through the motions of a Pinkie-Promise as he did so.
Now it was official. God of Chaos or not, Discord would definitely suffer the consequences if he broke a Pinkie-Promise. He would have no choice but to hoof over their marks when the game ended now.
“…Alright, you’re on.” Diamond retorted, starting to grow a slight smirk.
“Heeheheee, lovely!~ No, if you’ll excuse me, I will be back at your mansion in the movie theater. Gotta catch up on the Power Ponies movie ya know. Discord said before poofing up a pair of 3-D glasses and a bucket of popcorn. “Ta-ta ladies!~ Hahahaha!” Discord laughed before teleporting out of the fillie’s sight.
Diamond then let out a sigh of exhaustion. If she wanted her cutie-mark back, she would need to play Discord’s stupid game, which could most likely end up with a lot of humiliation on her part, and Silver’s. She then turned to Silver and gave an annoyed expression. “…Still think I should try to make friends with him?”
“Hey, worry about THAT when we’re not blank flanks anymore! Our cutie-marks are priority right now!” Silver Spoon yelled. It kinda stunk that she had gotten dragged into this by trying to help her friend get through the weekend, but what was she to do? Diamond was her friend; she couldn’t just leave her hanging.
“Right right…So the rest of the day without our cutie-marks huh?...No big deal right? Let’s not let this mess up our plans at Sugarcube Corner; it could be worse…” Diamond said with a slightly nervous smile.
“Y-Yeah…hehe…let’s just not let the humiliation and shame of being markless get to us right?” Silver Spoon said with the same nervous smile.
