The Fanciest of Pants

by FoxMarcello

First published

The story of how Fancy Pants got his cutie mark.

Everyone knows Fancy Pants is the most important pony in Canterlot. So of course something like his cutie mark story is something all the ponies would want to know. Well, now you get to know

Bowtie Boy

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The sun was rising over Equestria. As the warm rays of light reached into Fancy Pants' room, he hid his head under the covers. It wasn't fun for a seven-year-old to rise with the sun on a Saturday, but then he realized something. He wasn't a seven-year-old anymore!
Fancy Pants rushed out of bed and got dressed as quickly as he could, then rushed down the stairs as fast as his seven eight-year-old legs could carry him. On his way down, he passed by his nanny, who was carrying a tray of food. Nana jumped back in surprise, nearly spilling the platter.
"Young Master! You're awake!" she stammered.
Fancy Pants couldn't contain his excitement. "How could I possibly sleep on my birthday!?" He hopped down the last six steps and hit the ground running. He ran to the rec room, knocking over servants on the way. When he got to the rec room, however, nopony was there yet.
Nana finally caught up with him. "Are you ready to calm down and eat your breakfast yet?"
***
"Mother! Father!" Fancy ran to his parents as they entered the rec room an hour later.
"Happy birthday, darling," his mother said as she hugged him.
His father patted his head. "We have something for you," he said, pulling out a small wrapped box.
"OOH! What's in it?" Fancy bounced up and down as the box was set before him.
"Well, open it, silly pants!" his mother laughed.
Fancy Pants opened the wrapping to reveal a shiny new silk bowtie with a single jewel on the knot.
"I love it!" he said as he took off the tie he was wearing and tied the new one on. His father then fixed it so the jewel was in the proper place.
"You know," Mother said, "Fancy's getting to be about the age where ponies start getting their cutie marks, isn't he?"
"By George, I think he is! Do you know what your destiny is, son?" his father asked.
"I'm gonna be the most important pony in Canterlot! All the other ponies are gonna do exactly what I say, just 'cuz I'm super rich and popular."
"That's right. You're a chip off the old block."
Fancy Pants looked back at his flank, but it was still blank. He frowned. "That is my destiny, right?"
His mother put a hoof on his shoulder. "Perhaps your destiny is more specific."
"I think the boy just needs some experience dealing with lesser ponies," his father said. "You'll have your cutie mark by the time we finish our outing."
"An outing?" Fancy's face lit up again. "Where are we going?"
"Your mother and I are going to take you on a walk to show off your new bowtie." his father said.
***
Fancy Pants and walked between his parents. "Keep your nose up, dear," his mother said, "no need to watch were you're going. It's other ponies' job to do that for you."
Fancy looked up at the sky. He could see what looked like a couple of pegasus ponies arguing about what to do with a raincloud. It dawned on him that knowing what's going on might be more important than keeping his nose up...
Just then, Fancy tripped over something and fell to the ground. He looked at his assailant to find it was a baby unicorn girl.
"Watch where you're going, commoner! Do you know who I am?" he scolded.
The infant's eyes filled with tears. Fancy Pants realized his "destiny" was to be completely selfish, not caring how other ponies felt!
"Oh, no! Don’t cry." Fancy took off his new tie. "Look, shiny!"
The little pony's eyes grew wide as she took the shiny tie. Fancy Pants chuckled as it went straight into her mouth.
"Fancy Pants!" his mother called, "don't waste your time on that other pony. She's not important."
Fancy Pants looked at the child, cheerfully chewing on his bowtie. He liked the feeling it gave him to share with others. He wanted to use his popularity to make ponies happy.
"There you are!" Two tourist ponies ran up and picked up their daughter. "We've been looking for you everywhere!"
"What's that in her mouth?" her father asked.
"It's a gift," Fancy spoke up, "from me to you."
"Well isn't that sweet," her mother said. "Say 'thank you'," she prompted.
"Aaammahmnn," the baby said.
"Fancy Pants, your cutie mark!"
Fancy looked back to see what his mother was talking about. There on his flank was an image of three golden crowns, each holding a jewel identical to the one that adorned the fateful bowtie.
***
Years later, Fancy Pants was walking aimlessly through Canterlot, stopping to chat with anyone else who happened to be doing the same. As he turned to wave goodbye to a friend, he collided with another pony. He hit the ground, and a map of Canterlot fell onto his face, suggesting that no one was at fault.
"I say," Fancy exclaimed, "this map of yours is seriously out of date!"
"I tried to tell him that, but he wouldn't listen!"
"You said you wanted to ask directions, you didn't say anything about the map being out of date."
Fancy Pants stood and looked at the bickering ponies. They were both dressed like tourists, for lack of a better description.
"You!" Fancy said. "You're the runaway girl's parents, aren't you!?"
"What?" the tourist mare asked.
"OH!" The stallion exclaimed, "I remember you! You're Bowtie Boy!"
"OH! Bowtie Boy! I remember now."
"We actually hung onto that bowtie," the stallion said, "It's what got Rarity into fashion in the first place... You alright, Bowtie Boy?"
Fancy pants was shocked. "Rarity is your daughter?"
"Yep, she's the 'Runaway Girl.' Hey, there she is now."
***
Rarity was spending the day in Canterlot. She was walking and chatting with some of her posh pony friends (including Posh Pony) when she suddenly stopped, horrified. Her parents were standing on a corner, which wouldn't have been such a bad thing if they weren't talking to Fancy Pants! They were sure to start talking about her at some point. Then her life would be officially over. She had to do something, but if their conversation wasn't going to turn to her, and she approached them, one of her parents would not only blow her cover, but she would be right there to be criticized. She could run away, but her friends would wonder why.
Just when Rarity thought things couldn't get any worse, who should approach them, passing right by Fancy Pants and Rarity’s parents, but Jet Set and Upper Crust!
"I say, Rarity," Jet Set said, "are those your parents talking to Fancy Pants?"
"Well... yes," Rarity admitted, "oh this is terrible!"
Posh put a hoof on Rarity's shoulder. "It can't be too bad if they were able to raise someone as sophisticated as you," she said.
Rarity grimaced. "Let's just say I'm one apple that did fall far from the tree... Oh, what am I ever going to do?" Of all the horrible things that could happen to her, this was THE. WORST. POSSIBLE. THING!
"Well you'd better think of something fast," Upper Crust said, "They're calling him 'Bowtie Boy'."
The ponies gasped at the horror of someone referring to Fancy Pants in such a way.
Rarity's face also held a look of shock, but not for the same reason. That's impossible, she thought, Bowtie Boy is supposed to owe his cutie mark to me. It can't possibly be someone as important as Fancy Pants!
Rarity's dad waved over to her, causing Fancy Pants to turn around. He walked over to them, also looking surprised.
"Runaway Girl?"
"B-Bowtie Boy?"
They hugged each other, much to the surprise of everyone around.
"I never thought I'd see you again," Fancy said, "I can't believe I didn't recognize you!"
"I thought my dad made the whole thing up!" Rarity said, still a bit shocked. "I always figured he wanted me to feel special."
"You are special," Fancy said, "you're perhaps the most amazing pony here."
Rarity blushed as the other ponies nodded in agreement.
"C'mon, dear, let's leave these two love-birds alone."
Neither Rarity nor Fancy Pants had realized just how close they were to each other until her father said that, but now they both jumped back.
Rarity rushed over to her parents. "Heh heh. I... understand you need some help finding your way?" She picked up the outdated map and started pushing them away from the rich ponies. "Ta-ta, everypony."
Fancy Pants smiled. "Well," he said, "it was nice talking to you all, but I really must be going." He walked off in the opposite direction.
The other ponies looked at each other. Without another word, they decided not to speak of this again unless either Rarity or Fancy Pants brought it up. With that, they disbanded.