> The Conversion Bureau: The Land Downunder
>  by Da Bunnana King
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

> Chapter One: Under a hot tin roof
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


The Conversion Bureau: The Land Downunder
By Da Bunnana King 


Chapter One: Under a hot tin roof
===
-Some where in the bush lands of Ripply-

"Sooooo hot," I complained to myself, whilst lying on my back under the tin roof that was begining to show patches of rust setting in. 

I had called that small tin roof my home for the last half year since I had been running ever since. Why was I running? Well I used to be a rifleman for the Army after I was forced to leave school, that and they basically gave me the job because of my family service record with the military and my history with Cadets. So I enlisted and was pushed straight into Basic Training before I was queued to be deployed, but a wrench was thrown into the machine and that wrench was Equestria. So it saved me... kinda, but instead I was placed in with maintaining weapons for the Special Forces and guard a building that kept Brisbane alive.

But the times I did get to go on patrol it was mainly to walk down the streets looking for Human Liberation Front soldiers, they were the main group that was abundant in Australia then anywhere else in the world. So I patrolled and came upon one of their meeting, apparently there were some high ranking members in their so I was ordered to eliminate them all by any means. I went in and did what I had to do, but apparently one of them survived and took his revenge on my family. I never knew who did it but they came to my house and killed my father and criticality injuring my mother.

The doctors said that there was no way to save her, but there was one way but it costed her humanity. She ended up being ponified and then later shipped off to Equestria, I tried to keep in contact but my job was going down the since most of the Officers were getting ponified... heck half of the squad I was in got ponified the rest just joined the HLF. So I ended up being kicked out to the streets with what money I earned, it wasn't a lot but I ended up changing it to Equestrian bits and sending them to mum for safe keeping since the rich only used banks.

So I was on the run most of the time, all I had was the cloths I left with and my two firearms. A L96 and my Colt 1911, I had them long before I joined the Army but I needed them for survival since I had found the one place that the HLF couldn't touch me... the middle of a mine field, I know it seemed good at first but then I began to run out of food and most of the food that was here was wild mutant pig and semi-poisons berries. The reason the mines were there in the first place is because where I had set up used to be an old staging area when the North Koreans and Malaysia invaded Australia long ago, they were still active since I could hear them going off sometimes when some idiot thought he could get to me. But it worked both ways, it kept everything out but left me trapped inside. But to say the least the heat was the part that killed me, my water ran dangerously low so I had to resort to having to purify my urine and then drink it. But today took the cake for worst days, the HLF got a truck and were hunting me all day.

"Guys there's a building over here!" a voice shouted, that sounded like it was coming from over the hill,

"Shit." I muttered under my breath as I picked up the near on broken rifle, I grabbed my pack and all the ammo I had and put my dark green tactical shemagh on since the sun would fry me with in minutes, but I knew that the small tin roof that I called home was going to be gone for good since one of them had some how gotten hold of an RPG.

He fired it at the roof in an attempt to kill me. "Bloody hell they want me dead. Who the fuck did I kill?" I questioned myself, as I ran through the dried grass that surrounded my little home,

"THERE HE IS!!! GET THE PONY FAG!!!" shouted, a deeper voice who had a New South Wales accent, he fired several shots that whistled passed my head, I turned around and fired a shot that landed straight in his gut so he was dead once he hit the ground.

"Got ya you bloody wanka." I said, while cycling the bolt and taking aim on his friend, I hovered the iron sights of the rifle over his head and squeezed, it hit him in his chest causing him to die instantaneously. "Dam, maybe I am losing my edge."

I knew their would be more but where could I go, I had no home, I had no job and I had a price on my head of half a million dollars. One idea popped into my head. "Equestria." I muttered, while I pulled the bolt out to reveal I had wasted all my rounds. "Shit... well looks like I wont need this anyway." I said, to myself since I had made my mind up on the spot so I dropped it and walked off into the sun set.
====
As I walked out of the bush land the land around me changed as it went from dried grass to blackened dirt that inhabited most of Australia now. It was a left over of pollution and global warming, the pollution stained the ground while the sun baked it. Heck even now I could feel the heat of the sun penetrating the polyester of my shemagh, if I didn't wear some form of head protection I would have one sun burnt head and also have terrible blisters.

"Now last time I checked the Bureau was on the western side of the bush and by the looks of the sun I would say I am heading their." I muttered as my orienteering training kicked in, I was in for a long walk but luckly one of the old things I enjoyed had still survived after all the years of abuse it had gone through, my ePlayer. It was a small black one that contained all the music I could get my hands on, even if it meant pirating it form the hypernet. But I didn't care, by the time I reach the bureau I would have to give it away along with my hands.

"If I keep up a steady pace I should be their before night fall," I said to myself out loud.

"And why am I talking to myself these days? Baaah who cares," I said whilst tossing my hands up in the air. I continued down the cracked highway as I could see a small blimp in the distance that emanated light. 

"Well it looks like I was right," I said smiling as the Ripply Conversion Bureau was in my sight.
====
Authors Notes: Haaaaayyy guys and girlz. It me Bunnana King your lovable writer here to tell you that I am doing this for the anniversary of the series. So I'll edit it later but for now please accept my humble writing. No I go!
-Bunnana King
> Chapter Two: Its a long walk down a hot road
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


The Conversion Bureau: The Land Downunder
By Da Bunnana King



Chapter Two: It’s a long walk down a hot road
===
As I continued to walk down the scorched road that was showing cracks from not being maintained in ages I began to wonder what my new life would be like. 'Wonder if I will be able to find mum again. Wonder if any of my mates have been converted. Wonder if they will have rugby and cricket there.' I thought to myself oblivious to my surroundings or the very small bump in the distance that was the Bureau.

I then stopped and then said aloud, "Wait do I really want to abandon my humanity?" 

It was the first time I was wondering if this was a good idea or not... Well not really since back when most of my squad was being converted I had wondered this myself, it came with the standard 'Do I want to lose my hands,' and the 'What is so good about being a four foot and also being any color of the rainbow.' 

"Well," I began to think aloud again to myself, "I would be able to see mum again and I wouldn't be attacked by HLF when I am in Equestria... but then again I am going to lose my hands and have hooves for the rest of my life and I don't want to be wasting my... oh wait I joined the Army." I said as I forgot that I had wasted much of my youth of being in the Defence Force, well Cadets wasn't full on Army, but things changed once oil and iron was found in Australia so anyone being over the age of sixteen and being a Corporal or above had to go through mandatory training in case of another invasion.

I picked up the pace again and then wondered how I had survived not being killed by the most influential group that ruled Australia besides the large mining companies which kept the law since the government collapse after the Army disbanded. I could of stayed in school but the fees became too expensive which my family couldn't pay, even though my father was an engineer it wasn't enough for the fees. So I had to get a job if I wanted to stay in, the only people that were hiring were the mining companies and the Army, I picked Army since I was in the system and my Dad knew one of the recruiting officers there I was able to get in no problem. I joined and when through basic training and qualified very high in rifling and survival. So they put me on general security for the base which got me seeing action weekly since some people attempted to enter and steal anything so they could sell it on the black market.

From there on I progressed to Sergeant which put me on the list for deployment but then Equestria came and I was pushed into firearm maintenance for the Counter-Terrorist Task Force even though I was a better rifleman in general but it was better than deployment somewhere in the Middle East or Africa on an oil rig guarding it for nine hours a day whilst being exposed to the radiation that most devices emit.

Everything changed on that day I went on patrol, I remember it as if it was yesterday...
Mandatory flashback
===
"Sergeant Linstrom go patrol sector eight and report your findings." said my officer, over the radio in my little corner of the armoury, the armoury its self was one large room divided up into smaller rooms where the guns were maintained but I was lucky since my room was not only my work place but also my room. So I could sleep on the job and no one would get mad at me which I thought was pretty cool. The room also had various rifles and explosives lying around, some gun oil, WD40, duct tape and my crushed clock.

So I picked up the small black radio handle and pressed down on the call button, "Sir am I to do this alone or am I going out with a larger patrol?" I questioned being the smart ass I was.

"By yourself since you wanted to do something else besides clean guns all day." came his voice jokingly,

"Roger wilco. Out" I said setting the small reviver down, "Finally something to do that isn't cleaning bloody guns all day." I walked over to my small locker and took out my stuff. I had taken out my grey digital camo uniform and slipped into it, then my simple chest rig that contained pockets for all my ammo and last but not least my F88 AUSTERY. The rifle hadn't changed in years since it was built to last even if you didn't maintain it, but I had made a few modifications to it. I had changed the ACOG sights to a holographic sight and gave it a darkened grey finish to it. I grabbed my ammo and put it in the poaches then walked out the door and began to walk myself to the worst section of the Brisbane City... Fortitude Valley.
===
I arrived there and began my set patrol route which was to walk the street to show that the government was an ever present power and that it shouldn't be questioned. They employed this tactic since the sudden rise of Human Liberation Force members had sky rocked over the last month. I was only there to look intimidating and to show not to fall out of line of our oppressive government who was always watching, it was reinforced with all the cameras that were set up on each street corner that constantly monitored everyone’s movement.

I continued down the main drag of it walking in amongst crowds of both ponies and humans, both of them would part in front of me as if I was infected with anthrax or some form of disease. I scanned each face and the alley ways looking for any suspicious activity, I spotted a man who was hurrying through the crowd as he attempted to get his way to the ally next to an abandoned shop. I called it in over the radio and was told to follow him.

I continued to follow the man down the alley way until he came to an large metal security door that had what seemed to be an ocular scanner. He pressed his eye against the device and the unseen locking mechanism clicked open and he walked on through. I knew I had found a HLF safe house and I smelled Promotion, so I called it in to my patrol officer.

"Sir I have reported HLF controlled safe house. How do I proceed?” I questioned to the patrol officer over my small ear piece,

“Enter and eliminate them all.” He said coldly over the radio,

“Ummm sir but isn’t there some one else more qualified to do it?” I asked, since I had never intended of killing anyone ever,

“Do as you’re ordered. HQ out.” He said before cutting my connection,

“Fuck me.” I swore as I strode up to the metal door...
===
I snapped back to reality as I felt the ground begin to tremble beneath my feet. ‘What could it be?’ I thought to myself as I pulled out my sidearm and got off the road and into a drainage ditch for cover and for protection for whatever was approaching me. Whatever it was it was big and it had a powerful engine.  I saw what appeared to be a semi-trailer with a carriage that looked like it was carrying horses since I could see their tails at the end as it passed me at high speeds.

“Bloody hell,” I said, as I put the pistol back in its holster and stood up and held my middle finger out to the truck and screamed at the top of my lungs, “BLOODY WANKA!” the truck stopped, “Oh shit… RUN!!!” I said as I bolted down the road to the Bureau as it was just with n 100 meters, I hadn’t run that fast in my life except for that time I played ‘Let’s see how big we can make the blood vain on the head of our CO’ game with the others in my squadron. I could hear the trucker opening the door on his cab and that just made me run faster since most truckers I know that work in Queensland carry a firearm encase of robbery. The Bureau was approaching fast and I could see both people and ponies inside but I didn't get a good look inside since I was more concerned about dodging the bullet that just whizzed past my head.

I ran to the door and busted through it ignoring the metal detectors and just ended up at the front desk red faced and painting. The small brown pony looked at me in horror since I looked like a HLF suicide bomber, so I casually looked up and removed my shemagh and said to the horrified pony nonchalantly, “I am here to sign up to ponification please.” As I put my arm on the counter and giving of the worst smile that I could produce.
===
Authors Notes: I dun wrote a chapter. You like and comment a witty response that has something to do with this so my tiny ego will rise and then I write some more. But I must go since I am needed in Mass Effect 3 as Scumbag Shepard… hey those reporters aren’t going to punch themselves you know.
Bunnana King, AAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWAAAAAAYYYYYYYYY!!!
> Chapter Three: Welcome back
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


The Conversion Bureau: The Land Downunder
By Da Bunnana King


Quick A/N: up to the first === it is the same but edited okay.

Chapter Three: Welcome back
===
"... Oh sorry you just startled me is all. We haven't had a lot of you military type come to the Bureaus in a long time." said the pony. I still couldn't tell whether it was a male or female since its coat was orange and its mane was golden blond, but it did have a higher pitched voice than most male ponies that I met so I was going with the pony being a female.

"Yeah, I think most of us are either ponies or HLF." I said as the word HLF sent a shiver down my spine, it brought up to many painful memories,

*Click*

"Put your hands where I can see them and move away from the desk." came a voice and the cold metal feeling at the back of my head, I did as the voice said, "Good now turn around slowly." I complied and turned around until I came face to face with a man with brown eyes and black hair who also had a five o'clock shadow, I recognised him imminently.

"Sup Bruce," I said while putting my arms down and smiling while he was still holding the shotgun to my face, "So are you going to put that thing down or do I have to order you to?"

"Shit... Alex, what the hell are you doing here!" He said lowing in his rifle and giving me a big bear hug,

"Ahhh! Stop it... your killing me!" I managed to cry out as I felt my lungs begin to burn from lack of oxygen, he released his grip on me and I could feel air rushing back into my lungs, "So when did you start working for the Bureaus?" I asked,

"You still haven't answered my question yet."

"Oh yeah, well you know living out in the bush being forced to eat mutant pigs, berries that make you high if you eat a lot, having to drink your own piss and boil all your water... you know the usually I have been running from crazy gun-men who have a price tag on your head that is nearly half a million dollars." I replied smuggle,

"Jesus Christ. Who did you piss off Al?"

"I think the whole of the Queensland HLF and several gang clans. I think I deserve a medal." I said again smuggle as I felt something warm seeping into my left arm, I looked down to see my grey camo uniform was now beginning to take on a red color, "Shit... I am losing my touch." as my face turned pale, "You have doctors here don't you?" I said as I began to unbutton the shirt to see the extant of the damage,

"Oh my... Yes we do please follow me sir." Replied the mare who was next to me supporting my weight if I collapsed,

"Dammit Al, it like we turn our heads for a second and you get shot at, that is it no more AWOL for you." said Bruce jokingly as he lifted my arm over his shoulder and took me off of my feet and dragged me to a door that had the words 'Authorised Personnel only' written on a plaque.
===
I was dragged into a small doctor’s room that had a single metal operation table in the middle and what seemed to be lab equipment scatter around on benches and cupboards that contained various medicines, needles and flasks. There was also a large red brief case that looked like the armour surrounding it would be able to survive being put under the treads of a tank. They helped me onto the cold operating table.

"Doc! Are you in because we have a patient!" Yelled Bruce as he ripped off my shirt to expose my wound to the air causing scab that had formed to brake off causing more pain to shoot through my arm and shoulder,

"Ouch, Bruce I'm not going to die from one bullet wound... and besides you know I am a stubborn bastard." I said while pushing him off of me,

"Bruce I believe most converties shouldn't be treated like that or do we have to go over regulations again?" said the doctor walking in dressed in a medical gown and large black rubber gloves giving him the appearance of a mad scientist,

"Do I have to go over the no drinking policy with you again?" Bruce replied angrily,

"No since I believe the last time we did I ended up winning." he replied smuggle,

"Not to break up the joyful reunion between two lovers here but I do believe this bullet wound is going to kill me!" I replied getting their attention as the pain had increased ever since my brown undershirt was taken off,

"Ahh yes," he said looking over at me, "Wait why I haven't seen you around here before."

"I just came in and was about to sign up until Bruce over there gave me the hug o' death and reopened the bullet wound from early today." I said as the doctor got his medical equipment and began to examine the wound,

"Okay I see, well I can give you some good news. The most of the shots went straight through but one of them is lodged in their so we are going to have to pull it out," he said whilst getting a pair of sterilised forceps and sticking something rubbery into my mouth, "Bite on this because this is going to hurt."

I nodded and braced myself for the pain biting down on the bit of rubber between my mouth, he placed the forceps in the bullet hole and began to wiggle them around searching for the bullet. The pain was unbearable as he stuck every nerve until he found it. 

"Got ya." he said while I felt the forceps clap onto something in my bone, "Three... two... Now." he said as he ripped his arm back bringing the forceps and bullet with it. I recognised the bullet as a 9mm, the only trouble was that I was being fired upon with some form of assault rifle... unless I was wrong and he was firing a sub-machine gun. I spat out the rubbery rod to find out it was a mouth guard.

"Thanks doc, so what now?" I asked as he turned to one of the cabinet searching for bandages,

"Well I put some disinfectant on all your wounds and then bandage them... but I would also like to see you in private to discuss something else." he said as he turned around with bandages and a bottle of dettol in his hands and an expression of 'something is wrong with you.'

"Well I am sure Bruce and miss..." I said staring at the pony attempting to guess her name,

"Caramel Toffee." she replied,

"And Miss Toffee would give us some privacy." I parroted back, they left the room and it was just me and the doctor.
===
"Well before we get started I think I should introduce myself," I said, "My name is Alejandro Linstrom."

"Pleasure to meet you Alihandro, my name is Doctor Neil Spichemin." he said butchering my name whilst also putting disinfectant on a cotton ball and rubbing it on my wounds that I had acquired over my time surviving in the bush,

"So doc what did you want to speak with me about?" I said,

"Well while I was examining you my Medi-Helper implant picked up several diseases and a high reading on the Geiger counter." 

"So that means?"

"Well two of the diseases I can treat but the others are some form of out-dated bio-weapon and the radiation you have absorbed seems to be forming a tumour in the right hemisphere in your frontal lobe. I would have to operate on you but I don’t have the equipment or the proper training in neurology."

"Sorry doc but my knowledge of the human anatomy goes so far, but from what I am hearing is that I am not going to make it till the end of the year."

"Sadly yes, that is why I asked you if you were going to undergo conversion because that would fix all your problems... and that should do it but now comes the needle." he said reaching for something behind him,

"Wait what needle?" I said beginning to panic,

"Just the one that will get rid of some of the diseases and a tiny bit of the radiation." he said bringing his arm violently forward with a large needle in his hand and managed to hit my shoulder with it,

"Sneaky mother f*cker." I said wincing from the small prick,

"Their now that wasn't so bad. Now off you go... and I better not see you in here again unless you are going to convert." he said pulling the needle out of my arm and placing a small ban-aid on it, he waved me out the small room and I was back in the entrance of the bureau.
===
I walked back up to the front desk where Toffee was typing on her computer; she had a small pile papers printed off and several clipboards with the same paper on them each and a small cup with pens in them.

"So I guess I have to sign something for the conversion thing?" I asked somewhat startling her,

"Yes you do," she said grabbing a clip board with her mouth and placing it on the desk in front of her, "You have to read it and then fill out some details and that is about it."

"Thank you. I'll just grab a seat and fill this out." I said picking up the clip board and a black pen and then walked over to one of the seats that dotted the entrance.

I took a seat in a chair that was surrounded by others and a small wooden table, the table was fake because I could see the subtle diffidence in the surface of it because of some air bubbles and tiny scratches that showed grey underneath it. I look at the clip board and began to read it. 

It was the standard 'You are going to sign your life away' writing but this time it seemed to be more so that 'With the signing of this I agree to live a happy life as a pony in Equestria and I shall obey her laws as such.' I had never seen anything like it before. It felt like I was more so just signing up for shore leave than 'turn me into a pony,' it even said I could leave the bureau or leave before being converted at any time I wanted, it didn't feel like I was forced to be suck in the bureau for seven days as a prisoner being forced to learn how to be a pony at all. 

At the end of it said 'And upon this I fully agree to abide by the laws of Equestria and the Royal Sisters. I also agree to become an abiding citizen of Equestria after my conversion.' Next to the last words were where I was to place my signature. So I wrote it down and then flipped over to the next page which looked like a quick medical record that just listed what I am allergic to and stuff like that.

After a while I had completed the sheet I walked back over to the main desk and handed back the clip board full filled out. "Thank you Alejandro, now if you could please follow me." Toffee said bouncing off her chair and ushering me towards a pair of double doors.

We walked through them together into a short corridor that branched off into different parts of the building. "On your left we have the main relaxation area, to the left is the sleeping areas with the shower block further down that way and at the end we have the lunch room. Oh and also down the hall and to the right are the class rooms and the indoor garden." she said as we came to a stop outside of the lunch room, "Now if I am not mistaken I believe it is lunch time for most of our residence but after lunch you have your orientation and then basic Equestrian anatomy, any questions?"

"No ma'am and thank you." I said walking into the lunch room,

"Okay and if you do ask me, Bruce or the head of the Bureau Star Dancer." she said trotting back to the main reception,

"Will do and nice meeting you Miss."

"Please Alejandro just call me Caramel."

"Sure thing if you could call me Alex."

"Deal and enjoy your lunch." she said smiling before trotting back to the reception.
===

Authors Notes: Hehehehe this is fun but please don't forget to comment. Otherwise I don't know if I am doing something wrong or if you are enjoying my work. So comment and stuff but I must leave for my Biology Assignment needs me. 
Bunnana King AWWAAAAYYYY!!!
-Bunnana King

> Chapter Four: Food goes in mouth
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

The Conversion Bureau: The Land Downunder
By Da Bunnana King


Chapter Four: Food goes in mouth
===
I stood there in the lunch room being assaulted with tantalizing smells that wafted from the opposite side of the room. I swear I could see the aroma of the food drifting through the air. I felt swept off my feet as I slowly walk to the other side of the room... Until I was crash tackled by a chrome colored pony with a charcoal black mane.

"Alex!" yelled the pony who must of been some form of pegasis since it had chrome wings poking out from his back,

"Hi random pony who probably just screwed up my arm again... have we meet?" I said as I could feel pain emanating from my shoulder,

"Oh yeah I forgot, I am a pony now. It’s me Louie, from school!" he said hopping off of my chest,

"Sweet baby Jesus... It is you Rabbit." I said as I could see the same hair and eye color of his past human self, his black hair and blue eyes and I had a good theory of why he turned out as a pegasis. You see back when I was still in school Louis attended aviation with me and he was always top of the class and any time that he could get behind the yoke of the aircraft he was the first in line. After I joined the army apparently he got accepted into the RAAF as a pilot, but after we were all disbanded we all went our separate ways. 

"So... what brings you out here Mexican?" he questioned me,

"Oh you know, the surfing, the beach and no HLF madmen gunning after you ever day or two." I replied as I began to dust my semi-clean shirt,

"Ahh forgot about that whole ordeal with the HLF... Oh!! You’re never going to believe it but guess what?" he said as his face exploded with an enormous smile,

"A ten foot pink elephant with a horn and wings invading Woga Woga?" I replied trying to keep a good poker face but it was failing quickly,

"Close but no cigar... Jude, Martin and James are here too! Isn't this exiting it’s going to be like school all over again, except without Mr. Phillip ranting about not putting trash in his bin." he said eagerly as his eyes were now gleaming with excitement,

"Awww yeah were getting the gang back together. Now one can stop our plans for world domination. AHAHAHAHAH!" I cackled maniacally,

"Louis who are you talkin... Alex, is that you?" said the slightly chubby red unicorn with a blond and somewhat blue mane,

"Yeah it me Martin… So where is James?" I asked looking around for a ginger pony,

"He is in getting converted now. He went in a little after you came in." replied Martin who was now looking at me strangle,

"Strange because I was just in the doctor’s room getting a bullet wound fixed or is there a sick bay and one of those rooms where you get converted in?"

"No just the one and when did you get shot?" said Louis who was now hovering close to me looking for the bullet hole that he will never find,

"This morning and I am surprised that you didn’t hear the RPG or the landmine explosion this morning... I mean where I was hiding out was barely five clicks away from here... then again there were hills surrounding the OP so I guess the sound waves." I said to myself trying to figure the problem I had created myself,

"Alex you don't need to figure it out. Anyways it’s good to see you back here in society." said Martin nuzzling me,

"It’s good to be back... speaking of being back, where has the albino gotten too" I said looking around for Jude, we called each other by nick names a lot since when we were all young and new to school we always forgot each other’s names so we made up nick names. We called Jude the 'Albino' since he had near on white blond hair and extremely pasty white skin, Louis we called the 'Rabbit' since he was the fastest of us back then and they called me 'The Mexican' since of my first name being Alejandro. So it stuck forever, I didn't mind it... heck even in the army they called me 'The Mexican.'

"I think he is in the toilets washing up." Louis replied,

"Ahhh... So what is for lunch?" I asked as I could tell my stomach beginning to beg for food, 

"I don't know but it’s not tacos." Said a voice from behind me,

"Just because I can leap over high fences and, or walls." I said turning my head to see Jude in my peripheral vision,

"Meh true... So when did you decide to come back to society?"

"Ummm... maybe an hour ago... heck if I know I've just been going off the sun for about half a year now." I said shrugging as we made our way to the food, 'Yes. Now come closer my precious food... come closer... ness.' I thought to myself as the smell from the food was altering my brain to think only about it and its deliciousness,

"Hahahah, Alex you so crazy, but I guess not talking to anypony for half a year would do that to you." Louis said laughing as drool began to dribble out from my mouth,

"Hey... when all you can eat is berries and rotten pig meat everything looks... sooo delicious." I said as I walked over to the counter pressing my face against the germ shield's glass staring at the salads, pancakes and various other fruits and vegetables,

"Wow, the only time I have seen you do that was when you saw Natella for 50 cents." commented Jude,

"Don't care, food." I responded, the cafeteria worker trotted up and tried to pry my face off of the shield but was to no avail, so they ended up luring me away with food so I could get what I wanted.

"So gentlecolts what can I get you and your friend." he said, he was a cobalt unicorn with a black mane and large green eyes, he also had a marking of a salad being toasted on his flank,

"Hey Green... Ummmm... could I get the Caesar salad and an apple please?" asked Jude,

"Sure thing and what would you two young stallions like?" Green said turning his head to my two ponified friends,

"I'll take the hay fries and the daisy sandwich." said Martin,

"I'll go with hay fires and some hay." Came Louis,

"There you go," Green said levitating over two trays of food to my pony friends and then he looked at me, "And you Mr..."

"Just call me Alex. I guess I'll have that and that." I said pointing to the large pile of greens and the apple,

"Not one for words I see."

"No it’s just I have been eluding capture or my demise in the bush not three kilometres from here. So I have only had a diet of berries and mutated pig meat for half a year now so I do believe that the sight of actual food would cause me to drool at the mouth and..." I said acting like a complete dick head and after Jude elbowed me in the rips, "Okay I'll stop, could I have my food please?" I asked politely,

"Yes you can." he said levitating the tray over to me,

"How are you doing that? WHAT IS IT!!!" I yelled trying to comprehend how that small pony was able to suspend a tray without and wires,

"Whoa Alex calm down. It’s just magic." said Jude placing a hand on my injured shoulder and grabbing the tray for me, "Sorry Green but Alex here hasn't seen ponies at all let along them using magic."

"I thought most humans knew that ponies could fly or using magic. Well we can all use magic but it is all different types of it, but if I could ask, how come you don't know about us?" said Green moving closer to the counter and leaning over it to get my answer,

"I find the military to be a large and dense rock that I used to live under a good form of acquiring knowledge about anything." I replied smugly hoping that he would understand my poorly laid out joke,

"I think I understand, well have a nice day gentlecolts, oh and welcome to the Ripley Conversion Bureau Alex, my name is Green Salad." said Green,

"Nice to meet you mate." I said walking out with my friends to start my new life... or at least the beginnings of my new life.
===
Authors Notes: Oh look it’s raining again in Queensland… Meh… Oh look I updated… Meh… Oh looks its exam block… Fuck. Well I won’t be updating too often since I have to study and such so I guess I’ll see you in a week… maybe? Oh and if you want to be a pre-reader so you have the chance to go "Alex your story is piss poor... Fix it!" then slap me with a glove then send me a message or something... or be creative and do it through interpretive dance. So I shall go now to study... BUNNANA KING AWWWWAAAAYYYYY!!!
-Bunnana King

> Chapter Five: Lunch is nice
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


The Conversion Bureau: The Land Downunder
By Da Bunnana King


Chapter Five: Lunch is nice
===
Our small little group walked out of the line for the cafeteria and back into the lunch room which was somewhat deserted except for a few other people who were beginning to line up and get their food; until the the sound of bumps and unsteady hooves slowly trotting down the hallway was heard. A unicorn and a regular pony leaning up against the pink unicorn with a similar pink mane made our way towards us. The other pony had a red coat, dark red hair and brown eyes, each step he took seemed to be uncertain each time but slowly but surely they made to us.

"Sup, so who's this shady looking fella?" said the red Earth pony,

"I am Mantequia, the last of the Mechicans." I responded, whilst eating the small pile of salad that I had before me.

"Ahhh, so you must be one of the new staff that's going to work here. Hi, I’m James." He said holding out his hoof and trying to keep his balance.

I facepalmed, "Its me, Alex. My word James - did ponification also come with a free ticket to forget everyone you knew too?"

"No reason to be a dick about it Alex. I mean, you do have a beard and also a fucked up face...” said Jude while taking a bit out of the red apple he had,“so care to explain?" Jude said defending James.

"What about my face?" I said as I began to panic and feel my face for any imperfections; but I felt a very short beard and some long gashes and small hole in my face which brought pain for when I touched them. 'Fuck, what happened to my beautiful face? Now my modeling career is over.' I thought to myself,as I tried to look on a bright side.

"Alex?" Louis asked trotting up to me attempting to calm me down.

"Yeah sorry, zoned out for a bit there... does anyone have a razor I could borrow after lunch?"

"Ummm, most of us don't shave - ask Bruce, he might have one." said Martin.

"Alright-y then." I responded, while continuing to eat my salad.

"So," Said James trotting up to me and sticking his face in front of mine, "What you think?"

"You look like a little horse."

"Very funny, but tell me - do I have a red mane?"

"Yeah... why?"

"Sweet. Oh that and it will make it easier to make up a name later; but for now just call me James." he said carefully trotting over to the opposite side of the table where there was a spare meal tray.

'Where the hell did that food come from...? It's somehow Dylan's fault.' I thought to myself as I watched James struggle to sit down on his haunches. "Does every meal come with a free show?" I asked, trying to stir up the conversation again.

"What are you going on about, all newfoals have problems for the first day as they adjust to their new bodies." replied Martin.

"The fuck is a newfoal, and why does it sound so gay?" I asked.

"Newfoals are humans who were converted into ponies. It's what we all are and soon you two to be." He said pointing at Jude and I with his hoof.

"Do we have to be called newfoals?"

"No, but it should be explained to you at the orientation later today." Martin replied while in the corner of my eye, I saw James having some form of foodgasm.

"James you right mate?"

"THIS IS SO BUCKING DELICIOUS!" he cried out as he began to slowly devour his plate of hay.

"I know,right, and you thought I was lying." Louis said watching James,

"So I am assuming ponification comes with a free dose of stupidity-or has he slowly gone more into this state?" I asked, holding back from bursting into laughter as he looked like each time he took a bit he would begin to cry from the burst of flavor.

"He has been in a slow decline ever since you left... the doctors said that not even ponification would save him." said Louis while making a long face.

"Hey leave him alone... and besides, you have always know he has been like that; ponification just turned the dial up to eleven." Jude also commented, trying to keep a straight face.

"Seriously, guys, leave him alone. Both of you know that newfoal taste buds are newly developed and also his tongue is telling his brain that it is delicious." Martin said.

"I think Louis’ answer was the closest one here." I replied.

"Well, we'll see who looks ridiculous when you're eating your first meal as a pony." said James, eating the last bit of hay off of his plate.

"Have you seen me eat?" I said lifting my head up while they all began to giggle at me, "What?"

"You got salad in your beard," Louis said laughing,

"Well, of course I do, I'm saving it for later... you know if I get hungry." I said, giving the old shifty eyes.

"Right." Jude said rolling his eyes,

"So... Alex; what exactly brings you here? Because last time, I recall you weren't so happy about your mum being ponified, or ponies in general." said Martin, trying to change the conversation.

"Well you remember why my dad was killed, and mum was ponified in the first place?" I asked the group, who all shook their heads, "Well I went on a patrol one day and stumbled onto a meeting house for the HLF..."
===
I slowly approached the metal door, checking the allyway making sure that there was no one else was around. The door itself was iron mixed with titanium; it had a small keypad and a retina scanner. The keypad I could get through no problem - but the scanner would prove troublesome. I crouched over the small keypad and removed my multi-tool, which I opened up to the small flat head, and began to unscrew the small chromed bolts that held the front part of the faceplate to reveal the inner workings of the machine.

I pulled out a small bundle of wires, and began to search through them for two wires that I needed; a blue one and a red one. I found them and then proceed to cut them and wrap the wires together, this would ensure that any combination I put in would make the door open... but then came the retinal scanner.

I moved up a little to come face to eye piece of the scanner. I had heard that the machines could be tricked if you breathed on them and then attempted to scan your eyes. So I did, breathing into the eyepiece and then placing my face to the scanner, hoping for the best.
Next thing I heard was the door mechanisms begin to unlock,

"Fuck yeah," I muttered to myself as I proceeded inside the safe house. It was dark and damp; the walls themselves were dripping with moisture. The whole place was disgusting, but it seemed to open up after the first flight of stairs I descended in order to reach the inner sanctum of the building, which was a large open room with metal walkways crossing the tops of the room. There were sixteen of them gathered around a very large table with maps of Australia and America that had red thumbtacks in them, and string in some major cities and towns connected via red string.

'Must be their HQ's and supply lines;  base might want that, and they better give me some leave too.' I thought to myself as I quietly crept up onto the metal. With each boot fall, a small metallic cling would be heard; but I eventually made it over to a nice vantage point from where I could get the job done and get back to base.

I brought up my rifle, and looked through the sights of it.
“Rest in peace,” I muttered as I squeezed the trigger and felt the recoil of the gun as I looked away. I kept on firing until I had spent all my rounds, I looked to see if I had done what I was ordered to. I saw their lifeless corpse on the ground in pools of their own blood around the table with the map only partially intact.

I walked off the catwalk, while changing magazines on the rifle and cocking it. They never stood a chance, or even knew that today that they would die. The thought sent a chill down my spine, but they chose to harm innocent ponies and also defy the Australian government... 'Wait what the hell did I just think. Fuck, maybe Jude was right about the indoctrination of most military personnel.' I thought to myself as I continued to the table with the lifeless bodies of HLF members. Most of them were on the ground in small puddles of their own blood, but some of them were draped on the table.

I stepped over their lifeless bodies, getting blood on my boots as I tried to get to the table with the map on it; but I felt a hand grab my leg, to try and stop me from advancing from the table. So I pointed my rifle at what ever that grabbed me, to see a lifeless hand on my boot which was attached to a bullet ridden man with his cold blue eyes staring at me. Giving him the respect he deserved, I bent down and closed his eyes, hoping he would be redeemed in the eyes of the lord. I continued to the table and removed my phone that had a camera on it and began to take photos of the map; then I removed the map with the thumbtacks and string and placed it into my backpack and then radioed HQ.

"This is Sargant Linstrom reporting,” I spoke into the radio, “I have taken down the HLF safe house and captured intel, requesting a clean up team. How copy?"

"Roger, a team is being dispatched now; return to base for debrief." Replied my CO's voice.

"Roger." I said as I made my way back to the entrance.
===
"And that's what happened," I said finishing the tale.

"But how does this relate to your life being turned upside down?" Louis said poking me with his muzzle.

"Well..." I said before being cut off by the intercom.

"Would all newfoals please proceed to classroom two for basic Equestrian hygiene” said the female voice over the intercom, “And would all new convertees please report to classroom one for orientation please. Thank you." 

"Well, I'll tell you the rest of the story over dinner. See ya later bronies." I said waving.

"Wait, wait, wait,” Martin said stopping me with his hoof,“What did you call us?" 

"A brony."

"What's a brony?" asked James, raising an eyebrow.

"A bro who is now a pony." I replied.

"Makes sense... but, why?"

"Because newfoal sounds crap; and besides, I have ADD, so things like this pop into my head every so often."

"Alright then... well see you later." Said Louis, waving me off as I walked out of the lunchroom and into the long hallway that held all the classrooms.
===
Authors note: Thanks to Silvertie for prereading this and being a grammar nazi. Also I am finally done with study block so I should be writing more of this stuff because apparently you like it. So comment and all that good stuff, but once again I am needed else where.
Bunnana AWWWAAAAYYYY!!!
-Bunnana King
> Chapter Six: New faces and old enemies
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

The Conversion Bureau: The Land Downunder
By Da Bunnana King

Chapter Six: New faces and old enemies
===
        I walked into the room taking in the fresh air and also all that there was to see. It didn’t look like any form of classroom I have ever seen. It looked like an small auditorium that I would have a lecture in when I was in school... heck it looked exactly like the one at school, it even had the seats that look like they came out of the 80’s. But the room was also populated too, in the first few rows was a family of three happy talking amongst themselves about what their new lives would be like in hooves. Two rows back was a lone man who looked like he came straight out of a war; he wore a dark grey shirt like mine and grey digital camo pants that were like mine but had a more black undertone to them, yet he gave of a feeling that he has seen the worst of humanity and he had done some of it with his own hands.

        “Ummm, sir aren’t you going to take a seat?” said a small girl who must of been with the family.

        “Yes, I was just looking for one. So what are you doing away from your parents?” I said to her as the family began to look around for her. “You might want to get back to them.” 

        “Okay mister.” she happily said walking back to her family,

        ‘Well that was completely random... then again I’m in a room about to be educated in how to live as a pony, this makes so much sense.’ I thought to myself as I walked to a seat behind the ex-soldier.

        “Fillies and gentlecolts, may I be the first to welcome you to the Ripply Conversion Bureau - you have made your way here to start a new life in Equestria as a pony. Many have gone before you, and still many more will go after you. Most of you will be converted in the first three days, but during your time here you will have classes teaching you about being a pony and what it will be like on the other side of the barrier. The classes are after each meal so you shouldn’t have any trouble remembering. I would like you to meet the the staff that help me run this bureau, but I am must apologize since some could not make it to this orientation today. Here we have Sky Dancer, who is our resident flight instructor, our Earthpony instructor Green Stalks and Glimmer Sightlines, our unicorn and magic instructor. We also have our lovely cafeteria staff, our ponification doctors and also our chief of security, and I am Star Dancer, the head of this humble Bureau. If there are any questions I would be happy to answer them but I would also like to speak with a Mr. Linstrom after this, thank you.” said Star Dancer, who then backed away from the podium she was standing behind. So after waiting for a bit as the small family had went up and asked her a few questions I went up to see what I was needed for.

“Ummm,” I said awkwardly, “You needed to see me ma’am?”

“Aahh, Mr. Linstrom. I needed to speak with you because of your background.” she said,

“Look I was ordered to kill all those men back then alright.” I said, feeling the guilt beginning to build up once again in my chest.

“I’m not concerned about that, what I am concerned about is how you have a bounty on your head from the HLF and how you also brought a live firearm into the Bureau. That is what I wanted to talk about.”

“Okay then, well the bounty I just found out about it  now and the firearm was for personal defense. But I would be happy to relinquish it with Bruce.”

“Your firearm has already been taken care of, it just the HLF bounty we need to solve.” she said in a frustrated tone. Instinctively, I slid my hand down to my holster only to find the Colt 1911 that I cherished the most to be missing and along with the spare clip along with it too.

“Sneaky bastard.” I muttered under my breath,

“That is also another thing, you will also have to refrain yourself from saying swear words during your stay at the bureau, not only is it against policy but it also makes you sound very uncivilized.”

“Sorry ma’am but it’s been a habit that I have been trying to kick. To be honest most of the time it isn’t me doing it because of the aggression chip I have implanted inside my skull.” I said nonchalantly, but her coat turned a shade lighter.

“You have what in your skull?” she stuttered out,

“A Class C tracking and aggression/sympathy suppressor chip located somewhere in the rear of my skull... I think its in the temporal lobe on the right hemisphere.” 

“Okay then, well I also have a solution to everything. If you want to hear it.” she said sheepishly,

“Go ahead, I got nothing better to do besides go to the classes, eat and sleep.”

“Well we could ponifiy you right now before dinner, which would get rid of all the tumors and diseases you have. The HLF can’t track you anymore and that chip will be out in no time.” she said happily,

“... Ummm... okay... could I sleep on it or at least give it a think over at dinner?” I asked, as her words hit me like a semi-trailer truck going at 200 km per hour.

“Well it would be better if you could make a decision before dinner.”

“I’ll... I’ll try.” I said, as I began to wonder if this was a the right choice in the first place.
===
        I milled around the relaxation area which was mostly chairs built for both species and a large TV that I had turned off why I gathered my thoughts.

        ‘Do I throw away my humanity now or later Alex?’ My inner voice said,

        ‘Who the fuck are you and how did you get this number.’ My thoughts retorted back,

        ‘I am your conscious Al. Remember me?’ It said,

        ‘Seems legit... Well I can’t tell if you are my conscious, or if the tumors have spread and your a manifestation of my particular problem right now... but  you may as well stick around and help me figure this out. I mean you are a me... aren’t you?’
        
        ‘More or less.’

        ‘Well that’s reassuring, but if I start hearing ‘Paint the walls with their blood,’ I’m checking myself into a crazy house in Equestria.’

        ‘Noted, but back to the problem at hand, or hoof. Do you think you're ready for a change like this?’

        ‘I... I think I’m but its happening so quickly, heck its even more scarier than the bus ride to boot camp all those years ago.’

        ‘It should and shouldn’t be. On one hand, if you don’t ponify you are risking your life for a few more months of humanity which by the way sucks now since our parents are gone, you have no job, no home to go to and also your friends are leaving to go to Equestria at the end of the week. While on the other hand or should I say hoof, you are throwing away your whole being to start anew in the Garden of Eden. You’ll have everything that you would need and you would also see our mother again... that and there is a 35% chance of coming out as a pegasus so you could be able to fly.’

        ‘So I might become a bird. Big whoop, I still think that unicorn would be way more cool. I mean come on! Getting to use magic, heck I bet it would be better than the hands I have.’

        ‘So are you going to take the plunge?’
        
‘Why not. I got nothing to lose except for my...

BOOM

“The hell was that?” I said aloud, as I could feel the shock wave and the whole building shake.

        “All converties please report to your rooms we have a security breach, please remain calm.” Said Star Dancer of the intercom.

        “Shit... It’s probably the HLF wanting me dead.” I said out loud as adrenaline began pumping through my body.

        ‘Who else would it be... the mailman?’ The voice in my head said again,

        “Shut up you.” I said, out loud as I began moving to the entrance of the Bureau as it probably the main point of entry.

        I move to the door and waited for someone to pass. I heard footsteps advancing towards me and the other rooms, they were probably going to come in here to find me to drag me outside for an execution. I moved more away from the door frame waiting for one to come find me. I got lucky and a man wearing clothes similar to mine and a balaclava came into the room by himself without any back up.

Feeling lucky and being the idiot I was, I walked up behind him and tapped his shoulder to get him to turn around where, I delivered a haymaker to the face knocking him out cold. I bent over and picked up his submachine gun which was a UMP .45 with a holographic sight on the tactical railing.

        “Thanks for the gun mate... and I like your masks too.” I said sarcastically taking off the balaclava and placing it on my head. To my surprise the balaclava wasn’t made out of wool dyed black but a mesh of nano-weave and kevlar that formed a tactical mask and also gave the user a HUD while being worn. I looked down at the man to see that it was the man that was sitting in front of me for the orientation.

        “Groovy. Now let’s see where were all out shall we.” I muttered to myself, I cocked the rifle and a round flew out of the breach telling me I had just wasted a round, “Of course it would be.”

        I could see that the main force of the HLF were gathering in the cafeteria, so I casually walked into the cafeteria with the rifle hanging in front of me. I strolled up to a small circle of them surrounding some ponies... they were some of the staff and my friends. 

        “TELL ME WHERE HE IS!!!” Screamed one of them.
        “I don’t know where he is and even if I did I wouldn’t tell you anyway.” weakly responded Louis, spitting out a bit of blood.

        “Tell me or Gary will have some fun with you.” he said, putting his face close to my friend who was lying on the ground in pain.

        “Buck you.”

        “Gary, have some fun with this beast.” he said, snapping his fingers, “Gary I said you can have your fun now get to it.” He said once again turning towards me; his cold blue eyes felt as if they were penetrating my mask making me feel as if he had seen through my disguise.

        I nodded understanding that I had taken Gary’s place in the group, I pushed past the circle and grabbed Louis by his tail, dragging him screaming out to the lobby.

        I turned towards him and kneeling down so I was staring in his face, “Louis would you shut up for a bit. Now look I don’t have much time but run to see if you can find Bruce while I deal with the rest of them. Now go, that’s an order.” 

        “We’re not in the ADF anymore, but yes Staff Sergeant.” he said, steadily getting to his hooves and limping to find Bruce.

        “Right. Now the rest of them... Fuck.”
===
        I walked back into the room causing the whole group to turn their heads towards me.

        “Well that was quick or did you stick him in the back so we can have some fun with him back at HQ.” said, the leader of the group.

        “I don’t know, I thought we were saving that for Alex?” I said, altering my voice to be lower and more Queenslander.

        “Well there is room in there for all these ponies if we wanted to, but I know how much you like torturing pegasi,” he said turning his head back to the group and drawing his knife, “Now tell me where he is or this lovely mare will receive free cosmetic surgery from me.” he said, picking up a golden coated mare with and equally dark color of gold mane. I could feel my anger being push to much and it being reinforced by the chip in my skull I felt both rage and adrenaline course through my body.

        “How about you go burn in Hell with the rest of your comrades.” I said, raising my rifle up to the rest of the group and squeezing the trigger. They never expected it, then again they never expected me being incognito with the group. 

        “AHH ALEX IT’S BEEN TOO LONG!” he shouted, crash tackling me into a wall.

        “I DON’T CARE! JUST DIE!” I shouted back attempting to break his concentration while I gave a swing with the butt of the rifle. He dodged it only to land a fist in my face and then a knee in the stomach.

        “Come on Alex, I thought you would remember the man you killed all those months ago!” he yelled in my face.

        “I’ve killed a lot of you asshats in the last few months! Refresh my memory!” I yelled, back at him as he brought the rifle I held to my neck in an attempt to suffocate me.

        “I thought you would remember your first patrol better.”

        “How the... you’re the one whose eyes I closed... but I thought you were dead.” I spat out, as he began to press the rifle into my neck slowly depriving me of oxygen.

        “Yes and now it comes full circle. You killed me and now I kill you and your pony loving friends. Then when I find your mother I will make sure to introduce her to myself again.” he said, as he put more pressure on the rifle.

        “Then... burn... in... hell... with me.” I muttered, out as I felt for the pin on his grenade. I found something and tugged on it. 

        “What the...” he said before I was blinded by a white light and all I could hear was a loud ringing in my ears. But it didn’t stop him as I felt the rifle butt hit my face.

        “You bloody bastard! Get away from my friends!” yelled Judes voice, he was brawling with the leader but was losing as he was a trained killer. Kicking him in the chest sending him flying backwards landing him on one of the various lunchroom tables that were bolted to the floor. He raised the rifle up directly to him, I also spotted his knife that was just within my reach.

        “This is what  you deserve for being a pony fag. Now burn in hell with your friends.” he said as he let of three rounds in to Judes chest.

        “NOOOOOO!!!” I yelled, as I picked up the knife and throw it at him landing right in above his heart. It wouldn’t of killed him but it was enough to make him flee. I ignored him and ran over to my dying friend.

        “Dammit Jude, why did you have to go get shot?” I said, as tears began to form.

        “I... wasn’t going to stand by as... you were getting your ass handed to you.” he said, as his breaths became more laboured with each one.
        “What did I tell you about doing the crap I do?”

        “If you’re ever going to fight someone make sure to hit them in the balls?” he said, as he coughed blood onto my shirt.

        “Yeah that’s right mate... that right.” I said, wiping tears from my face.

        “Alex get out of the way if you want your friend to live.” said Doctor Spicheimin, putting a hand on me.

        “What?” I replied back, wiping more tears away to see him holding a cup that emanated a purple light.

        “I need to ponifiy him before it’s too late, you should get cleaned up because Bruce wants to see you... that and I don’t think you want to see the process of ponification.”

        “Right, well see ya Judas and tell me how the new shoes will feel when I get back.” I said walking away from him as he drank the contents of the cup and passed out.
===
Author's Notes: Well its been too long since this has been updated but I have had the shiny distracting object that is Mass Effect 3. So comment or I will get real sad and stuff. Oh and also Midnight Shadow also has found a way to clop to this... I am now afraid. I am now escaping this planet.
BUNNNANA AWWWAAAAYYY!!!
-Bunnana King
> Chapter Seven: A man with a plan
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


The Conversion Bureau: The Land Downunder
By Da Bunnana King


Chapter Seven: A man with a plan
===
I limped out of the cafeteria and down the hall to the main lobby, each step brought pain for reason unbeknown to me. I looked down to see that I had blood seeping from a stab wound, my whole right thigh was bleeding profusely, but it was nothing the doc could fix.

‘Bloody hell, when did the bastard stab me?’ I questioned myself.

‘At the beginning of the fight when he tackled you silly.’ The voice in my head replied back.

‘Then why didn’t you tell me earlier?’

‘Because you would notice it after a while.’

‘Still a nice ‘Alex your leg is bleeding,’ would be nice.’

‘Oh quit your whining because we’re here.’ It said, one last time as I entered the security office that looks like it had seen better days. The desk was turned over and it had several bullet holes and indentations in it; same with the rest of the room. Bruce was going through some paperwork and picking up the mess.

“Bruce you wanted to see me?” I asked, getting his attention.

“Jesus Christ Al. Who exactly did you piss off, because I haven’t seen that many HLF infiltrators in one place.” he responded, flipping the table back over and searching for something in one of the cupboards that scattered the room.

“I thought you knew that the HLF put a price tag on my head, but that was the Lieutenant I killed back on that patrol.”

“But you killed him... same with everyone in that room... Didn’t you?”

“I did but maybe he got luck.”

‘You did check that he was dead right?’ The voice said.

‘Shhh you, Bruce is talking.’ I thought, to myself in an attempt to silence it.

“If by Lucky you mean kevlar?” He said, spreading a map on his office table.

“I don’t think he was wearing kevlar but still I emptied a thirty round clip into them all. I think they would all be dead, but what is with that map?” I asked, as he was calculating the distance from Brisbane to the bureau and other points on the map.

“I’m trying to see if they followed you or if this was a direct attack.”

“They were after me. That’s why they attack here.” I said, putting my hands on the desk, “Now tell me where their HQ is on the map, I want revenge.”

“Alex, I have known you for a year and you are a very smart boy but this is the world's stupidest idea that you have ever had.”

“Bruce, they killed my father in front of me, beat my mother and shot her in the chest in front of me also and then beat me with an inch of my life and then left me to die. Heck if it wasn’t for this bloody chip my mother and I would of ended up dead.”

“Shit you never told me. I’m sorry man but don’t throw your life away, it’s not worth it.”

“So what? I turn into a pony, then what? Will they leave the bureau alone?” I questioned him and I strode around the room, “Who knows they might send assassins after me while in Equestria. Heck, I do have a massive price tag on my head.”

“You and I both know that it’s impossible for humans to survive on the other side of the barrier let alone pass through it.”

“It’s not impossible but highly improbable.”

“You and your book quotes Al, I swear your a bigger egghead than the men in R&D.”

“I know but tell me where they are Bruce. Please.” I said, pulling the biggest sad face I could muster.

“Fine, but I said nothing and I’m not getting your corpse.” He said, pointing to the commercial district in Brisbane.

“There won’t be a corpse. I have a plan.” I said, looking at him grinning like a madman.
===
Authors Notes: Short I know, but I just released a story today so give me a break. Anyhow school is right around the corner so yep, but I will still write. So leave your comments below and what ever else I say because I know you don’t read this or the title. 
BUNNANA AWWWAAAAAYYY!!!
-Bunnana King
> Chapter Eight: It's all in your head
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


The Conversion Bureau: The Land Downunder
By Da Bunnana King


Chapter eight: It’s all in your head
===
“Alex, you are a bloody mad man, you know that?” Asked Bruce as he put my Colt 1911 on the table, alongside a knife.

“Well, it is a good plan,” I said, picking up the pistol and checking the magazine, “Two rounds... dammit.”

“I’m telling you, its a bad idea. You’re going to get stabbed in the back, you know,” he pleaded with me, pushing the gun gently down to the table.

“I know; but in the end I am.” I said slamming my fists on the table, “going to be a pony. I’m just going to talk to them to see if they will help. I mean the PER does have a thing out no the HLF, so what’s the worst that could go wrong?”

“They forcefully convert you.”

“I’ll end up as a pony at the end of the week anyway, so it doesn’t matter that much.”

“Most minds can’t stand being forcibly converted. Some ponies come out super happy and brain bleached or some come out confused and they never properly adjust to ponydom... and some just never wake up at all.”

“Yeah but I really am ready to be ponified.” I said, pulling my hands away and strapping the combat knife to my left thigh.

“Alex, please don’t’, You have so much to live for; Don’t do this. Look - just stay here for the night and get your head on straight. Please” he asked, putting, my pistol back on the table for the final time.

“Fine... but in the morning, I’m leaving. No ifs, ands, or buts.” I said, taking off the holster and the knife and leaving them with Bruce before leaving the room.
===
I walked back into the cafeteria, only to see the dead corpses and spent rounds on the ground from the firefight earlier. Knowing that ponies wouldn’t want to see a room full of corpses I took it upon myself to get them out of the room and give them a proper burial.

‘Why would you even do such a thing Alex... They were regular people like you and me,’ said the voice that began to sound more and more like a mares voice.

‘They were before they joined the HLF. Now they’re monsters... just like me.’

‘Alex you’re not a monster; Alex, you had to do that deed.’

“I AM A GODDAMN MONSTER! I FUCKING MURDERED ALL THOSE PEOPLE AND GOT MY FAMILY KILLED, DAMMIT! NOW LEAVE ME ALONE!” I screamed, at the voice that was in my head.

I stood there shocked at what I had done; I had just yelled at a voice that talked to me. A voice that seemed to be my own thought but, wasn’t my own, it also sounded like a woman.

“What... what are you?” I asked, as my world began to crumble around me.

‘Call me Rose... and I am you Alex. I have always been with you.’ Rose said, as I could hear hooves hitting the linoleum floor.

“Alex, are you alright?!” said Caramel, as she galloped through the door, not phased at all by the corpses that I had been moving.

“Yeah... yeah... I’m alright...” I lied, but she could see straight through it.

“No you’re not. Now tell me honey; what is on your mind?” she said, ushering me over to a table away from the corpses and the blood stain that my friend had left.

“Well you got one part right there,” I said, taking a seat on the lunchroom table as I buried my head in my hands.

“What do you mean?” she asked, sitting next to me on her haunches and putting her foreleg around me to give me a hug.

“Well, ever since orientation a... a voice in my head has been talking to me. Heck, it even has its own voice and name.”

“Well I’m no psychologist, but I think it’s all the stress. You were just attacked and stabbed tonight.”

“Yeah... I guess so.”

“There’s something else, isn’t there?” she pressed,

“Yeah you could say so,” I replied, letting out a long breath out as I felt my burdens slowly being lifted off my shoulders.


“Well, spit it out.”

“The whole ponifiying myself. I mean, I know it cures all and in the end, all of humanity will becoming ponies; but could I be a good pony with all the evil I have done?”

“You’re not evil, no one said you were... you’re just being hard on yourself.”

“Look at the bodies behind you, and the bloodstains on the wall and ground. I did that; I brought the HLF here. I got my parents killed... I am not a good person.”

“Alex, it wasn’t your fault that the HLF came here; nor was it when your parents were attacked,” She said, comforting me.

“It is. Heck, I lead them right to the house, I even had my rifle with me. But I let my guard down, and then... then...” I stuttered, as tears began to form and roll down my face and the horrible day began to reveal itself before me again.
===
It was a silent night; the acid rain was making a soft pitter patter under the ceramic roof tiles. I was lying on my bed on a small holo-computer that I had manage to get off  Jude who no longer needed because it was outdated, but I didn’t care; it worked just fine. I also had on my bed a pamphlet on this new thing called a Conversion Bureau. 

I had considered going there myself, as most of my comrades and superior officers had gone there already. I began to look into it more as I felt something at the back of my head saying, ‘go for it.’ Even one of my friends Connah decided to sign up; He turned out as an earth pony, and worked as a baker in a town called Hoofington.

“Tango three,” I heard a voice whisper, braking my concentration. I got up from my bed and looked out the window to see four men with silenced submachine guns at my screen door. They were dressed in black jumpsuits with a tactical vest overtop, and had night vision goggles on.

“Oh fuck,” I said, before they shot at the glass. I jumped backwards over the bed and looked for my service rifle that I’d brought home with me. Sadly it wasn’t there, but next to the screen door.

“The boss wants him and the family alive, you moron! Now get them!” One of them yelled, the others complied and began to bash the screen door open.

“Shit shit shit shit shit.” I said to myself, grabbing my sidearm and running toward my parents room that was only ten meters away, only to be stopped by a large man who clotheslining me.

“Remember me?” he asked, before punching me in the face knocking me out cold.
===
Pain; pain was all I felt. My whole body ached, and it was the worst in my face. Once again, I received a punch to the mouth; I could feel one of my teeth break and the flavour of blood mixed with my saliva.

“This is what you get for being a pony fag, and going against the Human Liberation Front.” The one beating me said after spitting in my eye.

“Go... to... hell,” I managed to say, before being kneed in the gut.

“Well, I might as well send you before me,” He said, as he motioned the two other assassin to let me go. I dropped to the ground and I felt my rib cage fracture as his boot struck me in the chest.

“Mark, let up. The boss wants him alive,” One of the faceless assassins said to his assistance.

“Yeah, we may as well bring out. He won’t want to miss this,” He said, picking me up by my arms and dragging me outside on the the back veranda.

I saw both my parents who were beaten badly, but I had a feeling that this was the end; mum was crying now, and dad was on the verge of it but was holding a brave face.

What seemed to be the leader of the group walked out in front of us with a high powered Browning pistol in his right hand. I knew that this was the end of the road for us.

“Well, well, well. Look who we have here boys; the pony - loving faggot and his family,” he said as he walked over to me, “ Now, tell me - What made you think that you were safe from the HLF?”

“An AA-12 next to the bed, and the 31st SASR squadron.” I struggled to say, as my breathing became laboured.

“Alex. Alex. Alex... You know that we do have friends in your company and within that building that you barely leave.”

“Well... fuck... you then,” I said, before being pistol whipped in the face, I felt my nose broke and the smell of blood overwhelming my senses.

“SILENCE!” He screamed at me, taking time to readjust himself.

“Now where was I?” he said walking over to my father, who was now being dragged out in front of my mother and myself by two men.

“Ah thats right,” he said putting the pistol against my fathers forehead, “Any last words?”

“I hope Satan is extra hard on you in Hell, you evil bastard.” my father said, before his head snapped back.

“DAD!” I yelled as I struggled to get up, only to be hit in the back, bringing me back down to the ground in pain, I said looking at him and his pistol which was now soaking in my fathers blood, “I’ll kill you and your whole family.”

“I’d like to see you try,” He said, before signalling to the others to drag my father’s corpse away, “Bring the bitch here.”

“I’m going to hang you from your own intestines.” I vowed, as my mother screamed as she was dragged out.

“Any last words?” he asked as he put the barrel to her bruised and bleeding head,

She just remained silent. Staring down the gun of the barrel, showing no fear.

“No? Well then say hello to your husband for me,” he said, before he pulled the trigger.

“YOU FUCKING BASTARD!” I yelled again, as a man lifted me to my feet.

“Take her away.” he said pulling a rope with a noose in it, “Now, back in the old west of America, most criminals were hung from the gallows or trees.”

“What are you implyi...” I said, before I was cut off by a kick to the gut.

“Didn’t your whore of a mother teach you not to interrupt others? Now, as I was saying, when there weren't any gallows they would hang criminals from trees but letting their toes touch the ground,” he said as he put the noose around my neck and threw it over a metal girder that supported the roof. He hoisted it until my toes were the only thing supporting me from suffocating to death.

“After a while they would become tired and hang themselves. Slowly. Now I think you know how your story ends. Goodbye, Alejandro Linstrom; see you in Hell.” The leader laughed, and walked away, flanked by the assassins as I was left there struggling to stand up and to breath.

===
“Nonononononononono.” I said, as I rocked back and forth in a fetal position not too far away from the table.

“Alex, please calm down.” A brown pony with a black mane and light blue eyes said to me as he shook me,

“What? Jude, is that you?” I asked, as I poked his muzzle.

“Oww, and yes.” He said as he accidentally punched himself in the jaw, “Owww. Darn hooves are really really hard.”

“Don’t worry Jude, you’ll get used to them.” said Caramel, as she patted Jude’s back, “Now, it’s nearly midnight so I suggest you both go to your rooms; and since both of you are sharing a room, I think Jude can show you to your room while I talk to Bruce.”

“Alright Miss Caramel; let's go Al.” Jude said as he pushed me out of the room with his head.

“Jesus Christ Jude, when did you get strong?” I asked, as I knew I was a healthy 60 kilograms.

“All Earthponies are really strong, didn’t you know that?”

“No.”

“Oh yeah, first day here... don’t worry they’ll teach you everything tomorrow; but why were you crying earlier?” he asked, as he lead me down the hallway to the dorm rooms.

“I relived the day that my parents were killed, and I got hung,” I said, as I bumped and tripped over him.

“What? Wait, if you were hung, then how are you still here?”

“Well,” I said as I pulled myself together, “One of the patrol groups were dispatched to me as my lifesigns went dark, and there were reporting of VIP HLF targets in my area. So they came and found me, cut me down, and took me to a Bureau as one of them found the pamphlet for one on my bed.”

“Oh, so thats how your mum got ponified then... but why didn’t you?” 

“Revenge,” I said, as we arrived at the room.

“But he was still alive today.”

“I was also on the run at the time... but now the time has come to exact it,” I said, as I jumped onto a bed.

“Alex, please don’t leave us. Please.” He begged, as he trotted up to the bed and pulled a sad face that nearly made me shed a tear.

“We shall see in the morning, after breakfast and a shave. Goodnight Jude,” I said, as I closed my eyes and drifted into a somewhat peaceful sleep.
===
Authors Notes: Wow this took a bit longer than expected. So be sure to thank Silvertie, JaySteeny, Aegis and MidnightShadow for their editing and funny comments(I’m looking at you Shadow.) So I will be trying to write some more until then the bush calls me to survive in it.
BUNNANA AWWWAAAAYYY!!!

-Bunnana King
> Chapter Nine: Nightmares
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


The Conversion Bureau: The Land Downunder
By Da Bunnana King


Chapter Nine: Nightmares
===
I awoke in a darkened room only to have a light from somewhere being shined on me. I was lying on the ground, only dressed in the clothes I wore day in and day out but this time they were tattered.

“Where the hell am I?” I asked, the void of darkness that surrounded me. It did respond, but it was not the response I had hoped for. The darkness began to take form around me into a grassy field, trees sprouted from the ground before me and clouds materialized in the sky.

No longer feeling panic, I stood up on my legs uneasily. It felt strange but my knees felt like they were bending the wrong way and I couldn’t feel my toes... or my hands. I looked down only to see hooves. They were white long stumps that protruded from where my shoulders would be if I were a human.

“Woah... this is... new.” I said, only to discover that my voice had shifted an octave higher. Strangely I wasn’t bothered that I was a pony, but all I felt was... relief. Relief from the fear of knowing that I could never wake up in the morning. Relief of not being hunted like a rabbit by the hounds of hell. Relief from the pain that my heart had felt when my parents were killed.

I was happy, no longer being haunted by the sins of my past life or the scars that my body had acquired from the torture I had endured in the harsh wasteland of the Australian bush.

“So this is what a pony must feel like all the time.” I stated to myself, as the reality of my new life began to set in. I didn’t know what I was, whether it be an earth pony or pegasus because I didn’t see a horn coming out of my head. It didn’t matter, all that mattered to me now was finding a town.
===
I trotted in the direction of the setting sun in a hope that I would find a town soon. The sun bearing down on me was unlike the sun I had experienced back home. This one was warm and inviting as if it was shining down upon me saying, ‘Welcome to your real home, Alex.’

I loved it, I never would dream of leaving this place. I closed my eyes and sniffed the air around me, I could smell the grass that was freshly cut, and the trees were in bloom spreading their fragrant scent of burnt wood.

“Wait what?” I asked myself, as the world around me had began to burn. The trees leaves burned like cotton balls and the tree trunks glowed red and slowly withering from the flames. The meadow around me burned in a blazing fire.

It destroyed everything in it path; turning it into charred remains of tree or ash. The sun and sky had darkened leaving a red and charred sun with a light blood-red sky. But there was a land untouched by the fire, a small town; like the the one on a postcard that my mother had sent me of the small town she was living in, Ponyville I think was the name. I galloped towards the town with all my strength.

Something stopped me though, it was the man who killed my parents and left me to hang. He was standing there with a rifle in hand, but his face was distorted be on recognition. His nose was broken, eyes blackened red and swallowed into their sockets, face melting and bones not bending in the right direction.

“Yoooou and meee ponnnyy fag.” He said, in a deepened voice that sounded he was drowning.

I continued to gallop around him making a break for the town, surely someone would help me there. But something stopped me dead in my tracks. A ring of fire had encased me, burning away my flesh leaving me as a human again.  

“Shit. Well this is great.” I swore underneath my breath, as he approached me with the rifle held in one hand limping over to me as if he were a zombie.

“Haaavvve fun burning iiin hell ponnny fag.” he moaned again, approaching me with the gun nearly at my head.

“Fuck no!” I yelled, and tried to hit him but only landing a punch that was as weak as wet paper.

“I believe your missing your nnneck tiiie Allleexxx.” He moaned, again knocking me off my feet and dragging me to a large willow tree with a branch that held a noose around it.

“No no no no.” I begged as he hoisted me up with one hand and placed my neck inside the noose. “NO LET ME GO! LET ME LIVE!”

“This is what monsters like you get.” It said, but it was no longer a man but a pony; a white pony with a black mane, a earth pony to be precises.

“What... I don’t understand urrggg...” I said, as I felt the noose cut into my throat making me gag. All I saw was the pony staring at me with its eyes filled with fire and all the hatred of humanity.
===
“OOOOAAAAHHHH!!!” I screamed, as air filled my lungs. I sat up in the darkened room, drenched in sweat. Knowing that I wouldn’t get back to sleep and that it was probably the morning, I should leave to put my plan into effect.

===
Authors Notes: So I heard you like ponies, so I wrote you a fanfic. Tell me what you think. Oh Cloudhammer and WastelandGunner are best Grammar Nazis.
> Chapter Ten: Driving into the sunrise
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


The Conversion Bureau: The Land Downunder
By Da Bunnanan King


Chapter Ten: Driving into the sunrise
===
I looked at my darkened surroundings to see Jude sleeping atop his covers with his hind leg twitching and forelegs moving a bit. He must of been dreaming of running or something, I had seen dogs act like that on the hypernet before.

I now also noticed that not only that I  was drenched in sweat but t the sheets and pillow I was lying on. I smelled it to. Heck, I could even still feel the beads of sweat on my forehead. I didn’t know what time it was and for a moment, I felt that I was sitting in a house of horrors. I stood up and looked around my room. I was mainly looking for my backpack that I had brought with me.

Being dark in the room and me not tripping on my own feet I found the backpack with my foot. I bent down and opened up the small green pack in search of some clean clothes. I was able to find a pair of dark grey digital camouflage pants and a gray shirt. It wasn’t much of a leap from what I was wearing, but it was relatively clean.

After putting on the clean set of cloths, Jude slowly stirred from his peaceful slumber. He stared at me with his pale blue eyes that were the size a small dinner plate.

“Mhmmhmhmh. Alex? What are you doing up so early?” He asked, as he slowly rasing his head.

“Bad dream. You?” I asked, trying to move the subject.

“Your as stealthy as a man made out of metal trying to get through a checkpoint at an airport.”

“Yeah I know, but it’s dark and there's no one trying to look for me. So I think I can take a break from looking over my shoulder every second or so.” I said as I maneuvered over to his bed and sat down on it.

“So you still going to leave us or are you going to stay?” He asked, as he put his head on my lap.

“Jude, my mind has been already made up.”

“But what is it going to accomplish?” He questioned me, as he let out a big yawn.

“Besides me advendging my parents, it might also put a big dent in the HLF in this area.” I said, as I began to play with his mane.

“Mmmmmmmm. That feels nice.” He said, as he slowly drifted back to sleep.

“Shshshshhhhss, go back to sleep Jude. I’ll see you in the morning.” I lied, as I moved him back underneath the bed covers and leaving the room.
===
I quietly crept through the hallway unburdened by my pack or webbing as I was leaving them behind. The hallway was quiet that I could hear snoring coming from one of the rooms, so this allowed me some leeway with my boot falls.

‘Thank god all those times of sneaking out to grab food from the mess with Jack has finally paid off.’ I thought, to myself as I approached the door to the main hallway. I quietly poked my head out to see if it was clear. It was, but I could hear hoofsteps coming from the lunch room which laided directly in my way.

‘Alex, please go back. Its not too late.’ Rose pleaded, with me as I could feel her crawling around in my head trying to make me go back.

“No deal Rose. This needs to happen.” I whispered to the empty corridor as I did a commando roll to the opposite side of the corridor making a small bump when I hit the wall with my back, but I kept on moving towards the main reception.

‘Alex, please go back before you get us caught.’

“Your a voice in my head. You don’t get a say in any of this.” I whispered to myself, checking to see if the pony in the lunchroom. I could see the faint outline of a unicorn staring at the door waiting for me to cross or getting ready to serve the bureau its breakfast soon.

He turned his head for a second, which gave me the opportunity to jump and roll to the opposite side of the door frame that was double wide. I made it to the other side and quietly ran to the main entrance to be greeted by the rising sun. But I couldn’t be distracted by it slowly peeking over the mountains. I had to steal my stuff back and perhaps a car if I were to get anywhere.
===
Silently, I entered the office and looked around the dimly lit room. I looked around it, taking in everything I could see that could get me to Brisbane.

I found my gun and the knife lying next to each other on the table. I took them and put them on where I had them earlier. I continued to search the room for anything else, whether it’d be car keys or a teleporter. 

But there it was, a pair of car keys. They had a tag on them that said ‘Green Jeep.’ It must of been the car that a family road in on or his own. It didn’t matter. I had all I needed and I promptly left the room closing the door silently.
===
I walked out of the bureau’s doors unprotected by my shemagh, but I moved quickly around the road that wrapped around the bureau. I felt the sun slowly begin to fry the top of my head and I could smell smoke forming around my head as my hair began to burn. I couldn’t take it any longer as I ran down the driveway so I found my rolled up shemagh and just threw it on top of my head and ran for a tree on the side of the driveway, but I had made it into the carpark at the rear.

The car park itself was mostly deserted save alone for a few cars that scattered the parking lot, some of the paint on the cars were cracked and peeling and some had red X's on them. I looked around and spotted a green jeep near the far side of the lot, knowing that I would have to make a mad dash for it to avoid the security camera that was above my head I had to time it so it was looking completely one way.

I moved all the way to the right and I made a break for the car, I reached it and slid over the bonnet horribly only to land on my face on the drivers side.

“Oww,” I said, rubbing my face and opening the jeep’s doors, “I thought that would work.

‘What compelled you to do that in the first place?’ Rose questioned me,

“I was it in one of those old action spy films. The one with the British guy that always wears tuxedos.”

‘You mean Johnny English?’

“Thats the one. Now where is the handbrake?” I said, looking for it even thought it was next to my thigh.

‘Have you tried looking?’

“Found it!” I said, as I released it and rolled down to the main driveway.

‘So are you going to go back now?’

“Nope.” I replied, as I turned the jeep on and floored the accelerator to the floor making the jeep screech away from the Bureau.

“Next stop, Brisbane.” I stated, as I drove down the old highway going eighty nine mile per hour.
===

Authors Notes: Yes I have a drivers license... doesn’t mean I can drive that well. Once again Wasteland Gunner is best grammar nazi.
> Chapter Eleven: Your friendly PER man
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


The Conversion Bureau: The Land Downunder
By Da Bunnana King


Chapter Eleven: Your friendly PER man
===
The jeep silently purred as I roared down the highway, the land around me was a blur. I began to think to myself how to introduce myself to the PER member when I found him... then again he was an old friend so hopefully he wouldn’t ponify me on sight.

‘I hope they does ponifiy you. Then you can finally put this whole revenge business behind you.’ Rose hissed at me.

“Thats a new one from you. I thought you were nice, because we were becoming good friends.” I joked to her as I put the car on cruise control.

‘Well this whole, go and cut a path to the head of the Australian HLF, is kinda hypocritical of you. I mean you didn’t want to kill them in the first place but now you want to kill them all and raze the building to the ground.’

“Thats what you think,” I replied, as I spotted the large shield dome that surrounded Brisbane. The shield that protected Brisbane was set up by the dying government when the ozone layer had burned a hole above Australia, Brisbane bore the brunt of it making life under the sun inhospitable. But being the human race, we figured that if we projected a holographic image with a dark enough tint, it could create a sort of synthetic ozone layer over the city. It worked but last time I remember being in Brisbane the tint was a dull grey not smog black.

‘This is why Equestria is better.’

“You’ve never been to Equestria, let alone read about it.” I said as I passed a semi-trailer that looked like it was an old radar site that was used to monitor the skies when gang wars plagued Australia when the mining boom hit.

‘What is that doing out here?’ Rose questioned me,

“Fuck if I know,” I responded, as I neared the dome. I spotted that it was guarded by what seemed to be HLF, not wanting to take any chances I floored it and drove straight past them, making them shit bricks.

‘That wasn’t nice to do.’

“Fuck da HLF and da police... that and they were HLF.” I said as I cruised down the streets of Brisbane.

‘Alex, what has gotten into you?’

“Well you’re in my head, my life is drawing to a close if I don’t ponifiy and I am making a deal with the PER to attack the HLF. So I guess I am going crazy.” I responded, as I found what I was looking for. It was a black X marked on the ground in one of the plazas that scattered the dilapidated city.
===
“Well looks like it’s time to meet some ponies.” I said, as I pulled the jeep in an alleyway and hopped out. I strode around into the empty plaza and stuck to the shadows like a ghost, waiting for a pony to come out of its lair to ponifiy me. Mainly an old friend of mine.

“Ummm... Mister, you know you could just ask to be ponified if you’re HLF.” a voice came, from next to me.

“Holy shit!” I swore, as I nearly jumped out of my skin to see a tan colored earth pony who was holding a purple egg.

“Alex...? Is that you?” He asked, me as he trotted up to me.

“Yeah, I am Alex but who may I ask is this?”

“‘It’s me, Jack. You know, from your old company.” He said as he ushered me towards a metal door.

“Jack Daniels Sauwse? Wow... well that was convenient.” I said as he pushed me through the metal door. He turned to me and shook me.

“Are you crazy?! Do you have any idea how big that bounty is?!” He yelled at me while still shaking me.

“Last time I checked it was big. But look I am here for your help... well yours and the PER’s.” I said, pushing him away.

“Well if you need to ponifiy then you came to the right ponies. Let me just go get some of the serum and we can have you in Equestria in no time.”

“I need your help to take down the HLF.” I blurted out.

“What?” he responded, turning his head towards me as if I’d said, ‘You have a very sexy flank.’

“You heard me. I want to take down the HLF in this region, I know how.”

“Well then, we’d better take you to the Knight Commander then,” he said, as he trotted happily in front of me. “So besides living in the bush, what else have you gotten up to?”

“Well I went to a Conversion Bureau yesterday, got attacked by the men who have been hunting me and then I wound up here.” I said smugly, as we continued down the tunnels of the PER head quarters.

“Wow, must of been a heck of a day. So what made you join up with us?”

“Because I have a plan.” I responded coldly, as he turned his head around to me.

“And what would that be?” He asked, as we approached a door with strange symbols on it.

“Well it involves you guys and that ponification stuff.” I said, as I pushed through the door, seeing a large, heavily built stallion sitting behind a desk. His coat was black like the night, his mane was a shiny silver with a streak of yellow running through it, and on top his forehead was a long pointy horn that glimmered as if it had been sharpened.

“Well then,” he spoke with a deep voice like that of my old drill sergeant, “You have come to the right place then.”
===
“Sir,” Jack said, saluting him, “we have a mister Linstrom here to see you about taking down the HLF with possible conversion and joining the ranks of the PER as a human, sir.”

“Is he now?” He said, trotting up to me, “So what makes you so sure that we will help you?”

“Well, I know where the head of the HLF are in this region, I know the building layout, I have a plan to get in and out, and you also hate the HLF even more than humanity.” I stated, as he trotted around me observing me and my reactions.

“Alex we don’t hate humans. We just are trying to show humans that being a pony is the right choice.” Jack said as he gulped nervously.

“I know all about that. But I still need your help.”

“Help for what?” The leader stated as he trotted in front of me. As he slowly drew closer to me,  I noticed his cutie mark was that of a shield with a lone sword on top of it.

“I want the man who killed my parents dead.” I said, with a vengeance. 

“Well then I have one question to ask you... would you forcefully ponifiy one of your own kind?”

“Yes,” I solemnly responded.

“Well then,” he said trotting up to me and holding out his hoof, “Welcome to the Australian chapter of the Ponification for Earth’s Rebirth, Knight Aspirant Alex Linstrom.”
===
Authors Notes: Why do I have the feeling that I fucked this up bad? Oh and thanks to Cloudhammer, Jaysteeny and Wasteland Gunner for being epic prereaders.
> Chapter Twelve: Why is Braeburn so sexy?
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


The Conversion Bureau: The Land Downunder
By Da Bunnana King


Chapter Twelve: Why is Braeburn so sexy?
===
“So great I’m in the PER... so now what?” I asked, as he magic’d a clipboard over to me. I could feel the magic, it burned my veins and gave me a painful stab in the head. I raised my hand and rubbed my eye trying to get rid of the pain.

“Are you alright?” Jack said, putting a hoof on my back.

“Yeah, I’m alright.” I said, picking up the clipboard. On it was a form just like the one at the Bureau but worded somewhat differently.

“Please fill that out with so we can get you through the paperwork and into Ponification 101,” Said the stallion, who was magicking more items over towards me. I could still feel the pain, it increased when he moved closer to me.

‘Oh god!’ Rose screamed in my head, ‘MAKE IT STOP! IT BURNS!’

By now I couldn’t bear the pain, I collapsed to the floor and rolled up into the fetal position squeezing my head as if it were a walnut. The pain was excruciating, it was as if every nerve in my body was on fire and my skin was being peeled off and then having lemon juice rubbed into the wound.

“Iron! Stop! you’re hurting him!” yelled Jack while he pulled me away from Iron.

“By Celestia’s beard! I’m so sorry... I... I didn’t know that magic was so destructive to those with Thaumatic radiation poisoning,” He cried, as he rushed over to me helping me to sit up.

“Sumo-matic what? Please put it in laymans terms please?” I asked, as the pain reduced itself to a low dull constant burn.

“It means that you were exposed to magic and your body was affected negatively by it. So it’s like regular radiation poisoning except the dying in agony process faster and far more painful.” Jack said, rubbing my back.

“Well how the hell was I exposed to it? Because last time I checked the Equestrian barrier is somewhere in the Pacific. Far, far away from the small tin hut I called home.”

“Well Ripply has been known to have fluxes of Thaumatic Energy from time to time. That’s why a Bureau was built there, so unicorn newfoals could harness the power of magic,” Said Iron,

“So I got hit by magic then. But I heard that would kill you in ten seconds just being near it,” I said, finally regaining my breath.

“Maybe you got lucky,” stated Jack, lifting me up to my feet, “but I think we should take you to Caring Love.”

“Yeah, I don’t want you to die on me before your Ponification if your plan gets rid of the HLF,” Explained Iron, as he motioned me with his head to follow him.

“So what is your full name Iron?” I asked, as we walked down a long corridor that contained ponies going about their daily business, except when ever I went past them they all popped their heads out the doors just to stare at me.

“My name is Iron Hoof. I was born in a small town in Equestria called Dodge Junction. I was the only other unicorn besides my mother.” He stated, continuing to trot in front of me unaware of the ponies staring at us as.

“Cool.” I said, as we approached a door with a red cross on it and some other symbols I couldn’t understand.

“Doctor are you in here?” Asked Iron, poking his head through the door.

“Yes, yes hold on!” came a mares voice.

She trotted out. She was a pale white pegusus mare with a candy red mane and a red cross for a cutie mark. She had a nurses hat on her head which made me think this was some kind of joke.

“So I guess we have a volunteer for conversion?” she said, gliding over to a cabinet getting a purple vial of what I would call grape soda.

“No, we need you to check him out,” Iron said, pushing the small veil away from her, “He is our newest member.”

“Alright-ty then. Well please hop up on the examining table,” She said, motioning me over to a small metal table located in the middle of the room. The room looked like the one in the bureau except more... colourful.

“So what seems to be the problem Mister...”

“It’s Knight Aspirant Linstrom,” Barked Iron Hoof,

“Okay, so what seems to be the problem?”

“Ummmm... Apparently I have Thaumatic radiation poisoning or something like that,” I said, trying to pronounce Thaumatic as best as I could.

“I see, well the only form of cure is ponification but I am guessing that the reason Iron Hoof brought you here is to see when we can ponifiy before its too late. So,” She said, pulling out a clipboard and feather quill that she held with one hoof, “Tell me Knight Asp-”

“Please just call me Alex. Alright, I was never big on the ranks in the Army nor am I here.” I said, cutting her off and making Iron Hoof shoot a death stare at me.

“Okay Alex, tell me. Have you experienced paranoia in the last few months?”

“I have a price tag on my head of one million dollars or something, of course I am paranoid.”	

“Alright, have you had any large clumps of hair fall out latley?”

“Nope.” I said pulling on my short beard only pulling out a handful of hair, “Damn I need a shave.”

“Oh my. Well have you had a ringing in the ears of a sudden loss of balance?”

“Not that I know of.”

“Okay, and last but not least. Have you been hearing voices in your head?”

‘Say no Alex, you’ll thank me later if you do,’ Rose demanded.

“Yes. In fact it has a name and a voice of its own,” I said, ignoring Rose. But this made everypony in the room face turn a shade whiter and jaw drop.

“What?”

“Alex... I’m... I’m not sure how to state this but... you won't even see it to this Thursday afternoon,” Love said, as she held back tears.

“So, I won’t make it until the end of the week. What’s the big deal?” I asked, not fearing death for that second.

“Alex... Today is Wednesday 2:41PM. You have less than a day to be ponified,” Jack stated, still in shock.

“Fuck me.” I swore, as I felt my world crashing down around me. I saw my life flash before my eyes. The time my friends and I hung out after school down by the pool near the school, the time we took Martin dad’s dune buggy for a joyride in the bush, and the day before I left for boot camp. All I could say was it was a night to remember even if all I remember from it was waking up in the morning in a small puddle of my vomit and a throbbing headache the next morning.

“Alex. Alex! ALEX!” yelled Iron, giving me a firm shake to snap me back to reality, “Look if you can tell us the plan we can put the thing into motion while you get ponified.”

“No... that bastards going to be hung from the rafters after what he did to me.”

“Who are you talking about?”

“The head of the HLF. They beat and killed my family in front of me and then hung me low to the ground so I could hang myself.”

“Sweet Celestia,” Jack swore, as he trotted closer to me nuzzling me in an attempt to comfort me, “Don’t worry Alex. We’ll get the bad man.”

“I want him dead. By my hands.” I stated, as I clenched my fist.

“Well come with me to the war room and we’ll talk about this plan,” Iron ordered me, “Rocky, summon the other Knights to the war room.”

“Sir!” Jack said, whilst saluting and me giving off a small chuckle.

“Come on you. You’re not dead yet so on me.” Iron ordered me,

“Yes sir,” I said, falling in behind him.
===
“So are we all here?” Iron asked of the four other ponies that assembled in the room.

There was a fluro green unicorn with an even more fluorescent green mane that was looked like she came out of one of those old Japanese anime. She had a cutie mark of an eighth note on her flank. The next one was an orange pegasus stallion with an orange and yellow mane, he had a lightning bolt for a cutie mark. Another one was a white pegasus mare with strong red hair, she had a cutie mark of a fireball leaving a trail of blazing fire. The last pony in the room was a massive earth pony who was about the same height as me. He had a dark blue coat and dark purple hair and a cutie marks of jesters mask.

“We’re all here Knight Commander, now what’s this all about... same with the human?” said the dark blue earthpony, in a deep voice.

“I have a name mate,” I said, in my defence.

“You’re a human, you don’t deserve a name let alone being in this room.”

“I would give a fuck but I have a bigger fish to fry.”

“Both of you, knock it off before I put an end to it,” Iron Hoof demanded. “Now that we’re all here, our newest member here has a plan to get rid of the HLF here and take down their leader in the process.”

“So thats why you let him in? Because he had an idea of how to take down a stronghold that’s more defended than the Princesses Vault?” stated the earth pony again,

“Yes, but I have reasons to believe he knows more about this place then he lets on. So Knight Aspirant Linstrom, please explain to us your plan.”

“Thank you sir,” I said approaching the table that had a holographic display inside of it. I turned on the projector that displayed a large rectangular building with a cone jetting from the rear of it near an exit on the roof.

“Now fillies and gentlecolts, what you are looking at here is the base of operations for the Human Liberation Front but is also the building that houses the Shade fields.”

“So what does this mean?” Asked, the orange pegasus.

“It means there are air ducts running throughout the building.”

“Are you saying we flood the base with the aerosol form of the potion?” Said the fluro green unicorn.

“Yeah, then we can rush in there and throw the stuff you have in eggs at them.”

“That would work but that place is guarded heavily, they’re prepared for a frontal assault. If we did that we would all be dead.”

“And this is where I come in.”

“Oh? How so?” asked the white mare.

“I walk in with one of you as a prisoner with all the cans of the gas, place them in the air system and open up the sewers. Then you swarm in the place and coat it in a nice shade of purple,” I said, folding my arms in confidence of my plan.

“What happens if you get caught?” mumbled the orange pegasus,

“Then we go to plan B, I make a beeline for the sewer controls and let you in.”

“Who do you mean ‘we?” asked the blue stallion,

“Someon...pony has to be my hostage,” I smugly said, grinning like a mad man whilst staring at the stallion.

“So who is in favor of this plan?” asked Iron, “All in favour say aye.”

Everyone but the blue stallion said aye.

“All opposed?”

“Neigh.” Came the blue stallion.

“Well, then looks like we have some planing to do,” Iron said to the group whilst turning his head to me, “Alex, you and Shadow Jester should get your plan together for your part. Dismissed.”

“Yes sir,” I said, saluting him, “Come on Shadow. Lets go ponifiy some humans.”

“Why do I have a feeling that this is going to be the end of me?” Shadow complained, as we exited the war room.

“Don’t worry, I got a plan in my head and I think the HLF will fall for it... now where can I get a shave and a haircut?” I said to Shadow, grinning from ear to ear like a cheshire cat.
===
Authors Notes: Well this is coming along nicely. Thanks to my old editor Cailet who this time doesn’t want to claw out my eyes, and Aegis! 
> Chapter Thirteen:  These are my pony bombs. There are many others like them, but these ones are mine.
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


The Conversion Bureau: The Land Downunder
By Da Bunnana King


Chapter thirteen:  These are my pony bombs. There are many others like them, but these ones are mine.
===
“Much better.” I said, as I looked at myself in the mirror that was being held by the fuchsia colored earth pony. She had a wild coconut mane with a light purple streak through it and a cutie mark of a pair of barber scissors.

“I will tell you now, I have never cut the mane of a human before,” she said, with a sweet voice putting the mirror back on her little cart along with her other tools of the trade.

“Well you did a better job than most human barbers,” I said, running my hand along my short spikey hair, left a little longer than military standard.

“Well cutting other pony’s mane and tails is my special talent,” she chirped, waving a hoof over her flank.

“I can see. What do you think Jester?” I asked, as I looked over at Shadow who was as red as a cherry.

“...What, oh yes its a good mane cut,” He blurted out, before galloping out of the room.

“Well I better get him. Thanks miss...”

“Heavenly Curls,” she said, with a smile before waving me off.
===
I walked out of the small barber shop that the PER had set up in their underground lair. Heck, I really couldn’t call it a lair as they had built it like a small community, they had everything to self sustain themselves. No wonder why the HLF hadn’t found them yet. Living underground and only leaving to ponifiy people keeps you out of sight of most people.

“Shadow! Where are you boy?” I yelled and whistling to him as if he were a dog.

“I’m not a dog, Alex,” angrily replied Shadow,

“But I thought you were a massive great dane with a dyed coat and someone glued a horn to you so you could be a little girl’s pony,” I said jokingly, as I ruffled his mane.

“Not funny monkey boy,” he said, pushing me away and fixing his mane.

“Ouch,” I said pretending to be insulted, “I’m so hurt from that. I don’t think I could ever live that down.”

“Remember who you are talking to Knight Asp-”

“Fucks are not being given about rank. As far as I am concerned you are a means to my end,” I said cutting him off,

“What do you mean?” he said, raising his eyebrow as the cornered me into a room.

“I came here to kill the head of the HLF.”

“Why?”

“Because he has hunted me for the past half year and killed my parents in front of me in cold blood because of a stupid order I should have never carried out it the first place.”

“What do you mean?” he pressed me again,

“When I was young and the Australian Defence Force existed I was a sergeant in the counter terrorist task group. Well to cut a long story short, I was sent out on patrol by myself and discovered a safehouse for the HLF. I was then ordered to kill all the occupants inside,”  I said as I slowly slid down the wall.

“Then what happened?” He quietly asked, sitting next to me on his haunches.

“I did, but the one who has been hunting me lived and then rounded up some assassins and killed my father, beat my mother and left her for dead and hung me from the roof in my backyard,” I said, as I felt the pain and sorrow from that night beginning to build up again in my chest. But I stopped as a hoof was placed on my back.

“I know how you feel Alex. The HLF has taken somepony we care about from all of us at one stage.” he said, rubbing my back.

“What happened to you?” I asked, as I wiped a tear from my face.

“They split up my family. You see my parents strongly believed in what the HLF preached so when conversion was finally offered in Australia, they forbade my little brother and I from converting. So they abducted us but we didn’t get far as we escaped and made it to a bureau. I miss them, they don’t know what they are missing out on.” 

“Yeah, I can see but why?”

“What do you mean why?”

“Why join the PER? Why not move to Equestria with your brother?” I asked,

“Because I want to share the gift that Celestia has offered us. I want to open up the eyes of the blind humans and offer them this great thing of being a pony,” he stated, showing great pride.

“I see, but where’s your brother now?”

“He’s in Equestria with a friend. I’ll be joining him in a year’s time once most of Australia is ponified of course,” He stated confidently.

“Well I think I’ll get my revenge and head out to Equestria myself, want to see mum again and make a name for myself without bloodshed or infamy.”

“Right well then,” he said, standing up and picking me up, “Follow me because I have to take you and Jack to get ready for the attack and we have to discuss how we’re going to break in.”

“Right.”
===
We met in a large room that was divided by a grill mesh with a counter in the middle, and a black pony with a long orange and dark navy blue mane. He was near the back of the room attempting to type on a computer that had a cord linked up to a large stainless steel vat.

“Night Dancer!” yelled Shadow, “We need some pony juice!”

“Guaaahhh!” cired the now startled Night Dancer, “Don’t sneak up on me like that, and why is there a human next to you?”

“This here is Knight Aspir-” began Shadow, before I put my hand over his muzzle.

“Just call me Alex, but Shadow here tells me you’re going to get me equipped for the raid that’s coming up?” I asked, as Shadow swatted my hand off his muzzle.

“Oooh so you're the new member of our chapter. Well its a pleasure to meet you, my name is Night Dancer and I am in charge of the ponification potion here and I also give it to anypony that wants to go out and ponifiy.”

“Alright then, so where’s Jack?” I asked as a tan pegasus trotted in,

“Right on time as usual,” smuggled said Shadow,

“Sorry I’m late but the spell didn’t wear off on time so I had to see Dusk Shine to see if he could dispel it for me,” Said Jack as he trotted up to me. He was no longer a brown earthpony but a yellowy - beige pegasus with a dark brown mane and tail and deep blue eyes.

“So why were you an earth pony earlier then?” I asked.

“Because it’s easier for me to vanish from Brisbane if I look like somepony else instead.”

“Right then,” I said in disbelief as I turned back to Night Dancer, “So what have you got for us Q?”

“Who’s Q?” he asked, as his ears flopped down.

“You know, from the old spy movies... Well never mind it would take too much time to explain, but what have you got for us?”

“Well for Jack and Shadow I have more potion and a canister of ponification gas. But for you Alex I have a saddlebag for you, lots of ponification bombs and two gas canisters full of the stuff,” he said shifting over a dusty light brown saddlebag, two dozen purple eggs that contained the potion and two large canisters that had a red button and a timer system.

“Cool... so how does this stuff work?” I asked, picking up one of the eggs and carelessly tossing it. They weighed quite a bit and they felt extremely fragile yet it still kept its shape, its seemed to also have a thin membrane covering the inside layer of the egg, keeping the potion from eating away the shell.

“I would be careful with that. They have been know to explode sometimes,” Jack whispered to me,

“Well you throw it at a human and they turn into a pony, but be sure to throw them at their upper torso so the potion is absorbed fully into their system,” stated Night Dancer.

“Right, now all that’s left is the rope,” I said grinning

“Why would you need rope?” asked Shadow nervously.

“It’s a part of the plan.”

“Well I’m not going to ask, but here you go and here is that vial of regular ponification potion,” he said, pushing towards me two coils of thick brown rope and a small purple vial of potion.

“Thanks, now we got a place to plan?” I asked turning to Jack,

“Well we can get ready in my room and then head out in front of the main group. Follow me,” He said as I put the rope and the other items I had in the saddlebag and slung it also my shoulder and pocketed the small vial that stung when I touched it.
===
“So gentlemen, this is how we’re going to get in,” I said tossing the rope down on the table that Jack had in his room.

“How is rope going to get us through the front door?” asked Shadow,

“Well I am going to hogtie you and walk you through the front door."

"Are you sure that’s going to work?" asked Jack,

"Yes," I stated, as i picked up the rope, "Now get you hooves together so I can get this done right."

"So you must be into some kinky stuff Alex," smugfully said Jack, as I wrapped the rope around his hooves pulling it tight.

“I hate you,” respond Shadow, as I tied his hooves together.

“I know you love me, now lets get you in the jeep and there,” I said, picking them both up and slinging them over my shoulders. I walked towards the main entrance towards the jeep I had parked near there, but strangely they were quite light for most ponies... that or I am strong. 

“Wow Alex, how the heck are you able to do that?” asked Shadow.

“I guess my time in the bush kept me fit... Or I could be a robot.” I smugly replied.

“I am putting all my bits on Alex being a robot,” stated Jack, as he laughed a bit.

“Now let’s load you in here so I can get this over and done with,” I said as I walked out the main door and down the dark alley where the jeep was parked.

“Wait I thought you never got your drivers licence,” said Jack, as he began to shake in fear.

“I never did but it doesn’t mean I can’t drive,” I said, as I put Jack and Shadow gently down in the boot of the car and then shut it closed.

“Are we going to die?” asked Shadow as I jumped into the driver's seat.

“If you keep quiet and tell me if I am going to hit anything while I back out. Then you should be fine,” I said as I reversed the jeep only to scratch the right mirror, “I meant to do that.”

‘Alex please drive like a normal person and stop scaring those two,’ Rose said.

“Shut up Rose, I don’t need another backseat driver,” I responded.

“Well looks like we are bucked,” swore Jack, as I drove down the road at a breakneck speed.
===
Authors Notes: Do you know that in Australia there were no wild horses until 1788. Unlike Aegis who is not a horse or Australian,but did help me preread it.
> Chapter Fourteen: Operation Tunnel Pony
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


The Conversion Bureau: The Land Downunder
By Da Bunnana King


Chapter Fourteen: Operation Tunnel Pony
===
“Cause we got us a big old convoy rockin through the night! Ain’t she a beautiful sight?” I sang, to pass the time as we approached the building.

“Alex will you please shut up. They're going to hear us.” pleaded Shadow, as he hit his head against the window.

“You’re just jealous because I have a good singing voice.”

“Please be quiet... were almost-”

“Here?” I said, as I stopped the car at the gate. I wound down the window to be met with guard wearing a grey combat helmet along with grey combat attire and was holding a MPK5.

“What brings you around here with two ponies?” he questioned hesitantly me,

“Well I heard you hate ponies... I hate ponies too, so I was wondering if you wanted to have some fun with them?” I asked, pitching my voice to be slightly lower.

“Well then, take ‘em around back to the loading bay. We’ll one someone assist you in taking them down to the dungeon.” 

“Naaa mate, I carried their mangy hides here. I can get them there."

"Right, well follow this road around then take a left at the next junction and you should see the loading bay." he said, pointing down the road.

"Thanks mate." I replied, smiling before driving off.

"I thought we were dead for a second there." Shadow said, breathing a sigh of relief, as we drove down the road.

"We're not out of the woods yet." I replied, we pulled up to the loading bay being greeted by two more armed men with F88 AUSTERY. The loading bay was a small one that had a ramp leading up the side of it into the gray building.

I jumped out of the jeep while grabbing the saddlebags we brought with us.

"G'day mate, hear ya got some ponies for us?" one of the guards asked,

"Yeah mate, wanna help me take 'em down to the cells?" I asked as I opened up the doors to see Jack and Shadow cowering in the corner.

"Sure I got the one with the horn and you can get the rat with wings Daniel." said one guard to his assistant.

They removed them both from the back and slung Jack and Shadow over their shoulders as if they were a sack of potatoes. I followed them down into the darkened corridor to the basement where they kept their prisoners, the hallways smelled of blood and sweat from the prisoners and corpses that were dragged through the halls. There were also bloodstains running along the ground, some were fresh and others were old and fadded.
===
We continued this path until the lights darkened more and more narrow before descending into a staircase.

"So what’s with the ponybags?" one asked me,

"I thought they were going to shove that pony goop down my mouth, so I blew one's brains out and knocked these two idiots out with the butt of my shotgun." I replied, as we continued down another flight of stairs.

"Right, so why.did you bring them here then?" he asked again,

"Heard you pay money for ponies, so two unconscious ponies alive must be worth something."

"Yeah, about 100 credits each."

"Cool." I said as we.entered the jail cell filled room. The first thing I smelt was the stench of rotting flesh, I also heard moans and some quiet sobbing as we made our way to the back.

"Look at 'em, thinkin they could turn us into one of them." he said, as i reached into the bag and pulled out two bombs, "Well they ain't ever going to get me I tell ya."

"Well looks like this isn’t your lucky day then." I said smugly as i threw the bombs at their backs as hard as I could. They both collapsed screaming before their skin turned into wax and they became quiet. Both Jack and Shadow struggled to break free of their bonds but I helped by cutting them out with my knife.

“I think its time for a change of plans.” I sated,

“What do you mean?” asked Jack, as he got back	 up on all four hooves and stretching his wings.

“Shadow, you help these ponies out of their cells. Jack stay here and guard the entrance because the one we came in on is the only way out. I’ll get the canisters in place and open the floodgates. Got it?” I asked,

“Who said you could give the orders?” demanded Shadow,

“Now is not a time for arguing. You know what to do, I’m out.” I said as I placed their saddlebags on the ground and wore mine like a bandolier.

“Dammit Al!” yelled Shadow, as I sprinted up the stairs.

===
I ran out of the stairwell and hid behind the was and peeked around the corner down the long hallway, it was clear so I moved deeper into the building. I could hear footsteps behind me. I ran faster, but I kept quiet. I could hear voices around me saying unintelligible words, they seemed to almost be circling me.

‘Alex, slow down you’re going to get caught.’ Rose warned me, as I saw a sign pointing towards the maintenance shafts.

“Not if I take the long way.” I whispered to myself,

I ran up to the door and opened it quietly making sure that not a noise was heard. The room was clear before I entered, it was empty let alone for a vacuum cleaner and a mop and bucket and various cleaning chemicals. I walked over to a small grate that was coming off, I ripped the grate off and began to crawl through the small shaft.

‘Alex, you’re going to get lost in here.’

“No I won’t, I’ll just got to get to the fans which should be down this shaft, to the left and up through a grate which should land me in the main room for ventilation.” I stated as I clawed along the concrete floor of the shaft.

‘Well, they can probably hear you coming.’

“No they can’t,” I said, as I struggled to fit around the tight corners that were meant for robots to traverse, “this stuff is like rock and they would only hear me if I was dragging something.”

‘Well be careful because for all we know there could be tripwires, laser grids or landmines in here.’

“Who the hell in their right mind would booby trap a shaft built for robots?” I asked, as I could see the light at the end of the tunnel growing brighter.

‘The HLF is one of them.’

“Shhh, I’m trying to be sneaky here. Now let me do my work.” I said, as I put my fingers through the grate and pushed it quietly out of the way.
===
I quietly crawled out of the tunnel into the dimly lit, cold blue room that had exposed fans and airways that wound throughout  the complex.

“Right now lets see how theses work?” I said, pulling out a canisters of gas and the gas mask they gave me.

‘It works on a timer mechanism or a remote detonator.’

“Thanks mum, do I also have to push the red button that say ‘Relese’ on it to?” I replied back, as I twisted the first canister which made it tick like an oven timer.

‘Alex be careful, we don’t know if this stuff can get through the filters.’

“Rose I could count all the fucks I give on one hand.” I swore, as my anger began to rise.

‘Alex... just be careful.’

“Rose, will you shut the fu-” I said, as I began to have a coughing fit. I coughed into my hand and when I looked at it my heart nearly stopped. In my hand I held a large about of blood, my blood, the blood that kept me alive and fed nutrients to the cells in my body... blood from my lungs.

‘You might want to hurry up.’

“Go... good idea.” I muttered hesitantly, as I fumbled with the last canister.

Once the timer was set I picked up the gas masked and place it on my head pulling the straps tight. It made me feel claustrophobic and the feeling I would suffocate inside of it, but it was the gas mask or risk turning into a pony before my revenge was complete. So I found the vent that went to the basement level as it smelt like raw sewage.

‘Why would anyone put an air vent to the sewers?’

“Because Australia is smart like that and it let the maintenance robots get to anyplace within the buildings in an instant.” I said, as I pulled myself through the small vent.
===
Five more minutes of crawling later, I ended up over a grate that was right on top of the sewage pipes. Pushing with all my might, the grate gave way causing me to fall through it like a bear falling out of a tree.

“What the hell was that?” asked a guard that was around the corner.

“I don’t know Sam, lets check it out.” said a voice that I remember from my childhood.

I pushed myself back to my feet and drew my pistol whilst cocking it. I aimed it down the hall at my old friend Joseph, his arm was in a cast from his fingertips to his elbow.

“Well look who it is,” said Sam, who was in the standard grey drab that the HLF wear. He held an AA-12 with a standard magazine, he posed the most threat.

“Hello guys,” I said, pointing the gun at Joe’s chest, “I’m here to do one thing, and that’s to kill your leader. Behind me are about twenty odd ponies from the PER here to help me. Now you can either run away or stay here and be ponified... it’s your choice.”

“Well I think you forget that we both have bigger guns than you and you’re outnumbered” Joe said,

“Well don’t say I didn’t warn you.” I said as I shot Joe in the chest, and while Sam went to catch him I threw a pony bomb right in Sam’s face causing the change to happen instantaneously. 

I strode over to Joe, who was bleeding profusely as Sam’s skin turned to wax and his clothes were absorbed into him. I pulled out another bomb and began to toss it in my hand as I holstered my sidearm.

“Well... I did warn you.” I chuckled as I threw it at his chest, he tried to catch it but the egg still shattered, making his fingers retract into his changing hand and his skin turning into wax.

“Why?” he asked, closing his eyes his eyes as his nose began to flatten and become wider.

‘Alex, what have you done?’ Rose asked in horror at what I have done.

“It was me or them. Now let’s get the rest of the ponies in so I can get this over and done with.” I said, stepping over the changing bodies towards the doorway marked with ‘Control Room.’
===
I pushed through the door expecting someone to be there but it was empty. I could see on the monitors the PER waiting at the gates. Some of them were pacing around waiting for me, others were making sure that they had everything they needed. There was even one earth pony pulling a cart full of the bombs in case they ran out.

I picked up the microphone and searched for the sewer channel, I flipped the switch and talked into it.

“Alright, you guys better have your game faces on because I’m opening the gates and the canisters should go off soon so have fun... Oh and leave the leader to me, I’ve got a bullet with his name on it.” I said, as I hit the button that opened the gates and the PER rushed in with potion bombs flying everywhere.

‘So looks like this is it Alex... Are you ready?’ Rose asked, as I strode out out the room tossing a pony bomb in my hand.

“Yeah, the bastard has it coming.” I replied, no longer phased by the voice in my head talking to me. I could hear a whistling noise as the air in the room began to turn a shade of purple, and I could hear coughing coming from father in the corridor.

“You have to love it when a plan comes together.” I said, as I strode towards the upper levels of the base, I passed HLF guards and soldiers who were gasping for air but kept on inhaling the gas making the change from human to pony quicker.
===
I had made it to the main office of the base, but I had fought my way through some HLF survivors that had found gas masks in time, but they were to busy fighting ponies to notice me walking from behind them. I was down to my last bomb and last round, but I still had my knife and my two fists to fight the bastard.

I walked up to the door and drew my pistol, hoping he wasn’t hiding behind his door with a shotgun I raised my boot and kicked the door and entered it as I was taught to. I had my pistol drawn and scanned the room looking for hostiles but I saw none. He wasn't there, so I lowered my gun and walked around the room looking for him.

‘Maybe he isn’t,’ Rose began, before being cut off, ‘What was that?'

“DIE YOU PONY LOVING FAG!” screamed the leader, as he turned me around to punch me in the face.

I reacted quickly but dodging him and unsheathing my knife, I never was good with close combat but I wanted this man dead. I sank my knife into his leg, a spray of blood indication I’d struck his artery. He cried out in pain and I punched him in his jaw which sent him flying through the air to crash onto his desk. He rolled off it onto the ground injured. As I walked up to him, pistol drawn, I noticed his gas mask had a large crack in it.

“You’re coming with me.” I said, as I dragged his semi conscious body outside onto the balcony.

I pushed through the door to the smog covered Brisbane that now laid silent as the HLF was slowly dying within the region. I dragged him over the pebbled roof to the edge and sat him on he knees facing out over Brisbane. You could see everything from there, the river, the bridges and the destroyed buildings that dotted the area from when Australia was invaded.

“Look at the mess you made of the city... the city I grew up in.” I said, pacing back and forth behind him.

“It.. it was necessary... we had to get the ponies out of Australia... this is where they made landfall.” He sputtered out.

“But did you have to ruin the city, kill innocents and ruin the lives of countless many?” I said, as I tore off his gas mask. “Look with your own eyes at the once beautiful Brisbane. Look at the smog, the death, the destruction and the violence that has plagued the streets. And this all started when you came around and gave the people weapons to kill a friend who offered us help.”

“But they wanted to rip out what makes us human and turn it into something that isn’t... us.”

“That’s the biggest lie I have heard. Ponification doesn’t fully change who you are, just what we look like, but inside we are the same.”

“Lies... you’ve seen what it’s done to your mother and your friends.”

“You nearly killed my mother and she says that it’s nice being a pony. She says it’s a similar life but a better one then living in fear of the World Gov and the Australian Defence Force that set down martial law. Heck, I have to say that I wouldn’t mind living in peace,” I said, as I bent down to his ear, “Because I would go to bed every night that you would be dead and no one would hunt me.” I whispered into his ear, I backed up and pointed my pistol at the back of his head.

“Look upon Brisbane and the dying species that is humanity, because it’s the last thing you’ll see.” I said as I squeezed the trigger.
===
The round didn’t go off... the gun jammed was, the round was stuck in the breach.

“Well looks like god saved me.” He chuckled.

“I think you forget where you’re standing, or sitting in the case. You are seven stories up, if I push you off you will die, but being in a good mood I’ll give you a choice. Convert or take your chances with the ground.” I offered, as I pulled out the last bomb.

“Fuck-it. If it beats death then I am in.” he said,

“Well you’re going to have to catch it.” I said as I pushed him off with my boot and also throwing a bomb at his back on the way down. I couldn’t hear him scream but I could hear the sudden stop at the end.

‘Alex... that was brutal even for your standards.’ Rose said, as I sat down on the pebbled roof. I took off my gas mask, my knife and the holster but I took out the vial of potion that I had in my pocket. The vial sparkled in the light and was warm to the touch, it felt like both magic and technology were in perfect harmony.

“Well, he had it coming... but it looks like its the end of the road for me and you Rose.” I said, as I stared over Brisbane.

‘Well Alex, it’s been nice being you.’’ Rose said, for the last time before I popped the cap on the vial and drank it all down in one massive gulp.

“Urrrggg... taste like super concentrate cordial.” I said, as the potion made its way down my throat and burning my inside, but the pain subsided as I fell back into a blissful sleep.
===
Author’s Notes: Well looks like I haven’t derailed it yet and I must be doing something right because you are still reading it... I got to write this down somewhere. Oh and thanks to Cloudhammer and Little Solarflare for pointing out where I went wrong and for hitting me over the head with a rolled up newspaper... lets just say I think I may have minor brain damage.
> Chapter Fifteen: Dreaming
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


The Conversion Bureau: The Land Downunder
By Da Bunnana King


Chapter Fifteen: Dreaming
===
Darkness. It was pure black darkness that engulfed me. It gave me the feeling of floating in and endless abyss. Floating in the blackness with no form, I felt like I was just a tiny speck of dust in the endless plane.

I felt scared, alone, and sad. Was this some kind of hell or was I trapped in purgatory for the rest of eternity?

“Well at least I have you, Rose.” I said laughing, waiting for a witty response from her. “Rose, are you there?”

Nothing, just the cold abyss and me. So I was alone, forever, nothing to look at, no one to talk to, nothing but the endless black that I couldn’t move in.

“Great, now I can descend more into my insanity.”

I saw a faint light in the distance; it was like a little beacon of hope in the endless abyss of black. I began to move towards it, and a green field began to form around me and a large endless blue sky above me with large white fluffy clouds. I felt like all my troubles had melted away and I was free again. No longer felt burdened by the men who hunted me like a caged rat or the knowledge that I could die any minute. Was this the afterlife or was this the dream that they spoke of that all newfoal’s had.

I began to gallop on the grassy field, but I didn’t notice that I was being joined by a herd of earth ponies. They were all different shapes and colors but we all ran as one. I could feel the wind rushing past my ears and running through my mane, I felt welcomed. I felt like the herd had welcomed me as one of their own and not as a stranger, but something else in my eye caught my attention.

It was like a crystal snake made out of purple. I flew through the air slowly, inciting me closer to it. It ducked and weaved through the air, like it was a puppet being controlled by a puppet master. I followed it closer into a small cave within an ever expanding mountain.
===
The cave was pitch black, no natural light entered it. The only light that guided my path came from the crystal snake that led me through the darkness. The walls of the cave were solid grey but small mineral and stalactites dotted the path.

‘Where are you leading me?’ I wondered, as curiosity had drawn me here away from the rest of the herd.

I followed it deep into the mountains and the cave around me began to change, as more different crystals formed and the path began to open up. I lost sight of the serpent because of the size of the cave and how enormous it was.

The cave was enormous in size and had an endless pit in the middle, it also had strange carvings in the wall that gave a slight glow of purple, in contrast to the dark grey of the sides of the cave. I could almost feel the magic emanating from them, but it was not like the magic I had encountered in back on Earth. This magic felt warm and inviting, it almost feels like it could be controlled. The carvings almost called out to me wanting the ancient carvings to be used again.

One carving caught my attention, it felt like I had lost all control of mind and the carving had taken full control over me. I didn’t fight it though because I wanted to know what secrets it held.

I stood infront of it, watching it glow. I reached out my hoof to touch it. I could feel the magic pulsing through me, it was warm, inviting, but it felt raw and unrefined. I put my hoof on it and I could feel its full power enter me, but I was blinded by a great white light.
===
My eyes readjusted themselves after being blinded by the light. I wasn’t standing in the dark cave anymore but, in a large renaissance styled courtroom with massive marble columns supporting the extremely high roof.

I looked around the room, it had stained glass windows depicting a fight between six mares to take down an demonic looking pony, and the next one was the same six mares taking down what looked like to be a smorgasbord of creatures shoved together as one.

I continued to stare at them wondering if Equestria was still a peaceful nation, or if the media had lied to us and that Equestria was just like Earth but only replacing the human and guns with ponies and magic.

“Do not fear my little pony. Equestria is a still and always shall be a peaceful nation.” said a regal voice from behind me.

“What, who's that?” I questioned the voice. I turned around to see her, the ruler of Equestria standing in front of. Her mane had four colors that glistened in the sun and moved in an invisible breeze that seems like she created around her. She had the purest white of coats and gold jewelry that seemed ancient but were as shiny as the day that they were made.

“I am Prin-”

“Princess Celestia, the ruler of Equestria.” Said another voice that was all too familiar to me. In through a large pair of oak doors was a unicorn mare with an mute electric blue mane and rose colored tips, but her coat was a very pale navy blue which contrasted her crimson eyes.

“This is new,” the Princess said.

“I’m with you there princess.” I said, in shock that I was actually meeting the current ruler of Equestria, but also the voice in my head.

“Sorry for interrupting your majesty but I am Rose and that there is Alex.” she said, pointing a hoof at me.

“...” I responded, “Oh sorry but this is far too confusing, I mean how is Rose here?”

“Well it seems you two are linked. Like as you humans would say, Yin and Yang.”

“I find that hard to believe princess. I think Rose is the part of me that is common sense or at least a stabilizing factor in my insanity.” I stated,

“I see then, but there is still another problem... both of you can’t be converted, sadly on of you must stay behind.”

“So does that mean we fight to the death or do we see who has the most luck and play Russian Roulette?” I jokingly asked only to be met with cold stare from them both, “Well it was a suggestion.”

“Princess I think I should stay back otherwise it would be extremely awkward for a stallion  painting their hooves pink.”

“Are you sure my little pony?”

“I am very sure princess.” she replied as a tiny tear began to form in her eye.

“Princess, couldn’t Rose just hop back into my head... I don’t mind having her in my head... infact I think we make a really good team.” I begged the princess,

“I’m sorry but if there was any other way I would tell you, but sadly there is no other way.” she responded,

“God-mother fucking dammit.” I swore and as I stomped my hoof against the ground, “There has to be another way! You can’t just let her die!”

“Well she could become the next generation of ponies but there is a very low chance that you will ever meet her let alone her remember you.”

“Can you really do that princess?” Rose asked,

“I can my little pony, now please go into the light.” She said, as the large oak doors flung open with a blinding white light emanating from it.

“I guess I’ll see you around, Rose.” I said as I could feel a tear beginning to form.

“I’ll miss you Alex, and maybe one day we will meet.” She said as she stood right outside the door.

“I’ll miss ya too Rose.” I said as I fought back the tears.

“Good luck my little pony, for your new life waits on the other side.” Celestia said as Rose wandered into the light slowly disappearing within its glow.

I couldn’t control myself anymore, I burst into tears and collapsed to the ground crying like a little foal.

But I stopped as a felt a warm presents around my new long neck, it felt warm and pleasant... like one of mum’s hugs.

“Don’t cry my little pony, she is in safe hooves now with a new family.” Celestia said as she hugged me, “You have had a rough year, I think it’s time if you got on with a better life.”

“Yeah... thats one way to put it.” I said as I wiped the tears from my face uncoordinatedly with my hoof.

“Goodbye my little pony, I wish you good luck in your new life.” she said as I could feel cold air rushing around me and into my lungs.
===
Authors Notes: Sadly Alex didn’t wake up because he was turned into a pony burger by the HLF and Midnight Shadow for having no understanding of grammar, unlike these people who helped me and they are Wasteland Gunner and Midnight Shadow.
> Chapter Sixteen: Awake
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


The Conversion Bureau: The Land Downunder
By Da Bunnana King


Chapter Sixteen: Awake
===
I awoke to air rushing into my new lungs, but my eyes remained closed. I could hear faint voices around me but I couldn’t pinpoint them. Then my ears did the strangest of things, they swivelled themselves to the noise and it became crystal clear.

“I think he’s awake Shadow.” said Jack as I heard the noise of gravel being crunched behind me.

“Alex, come on let’s get you inside before we lose you again.” Shadow said as he picked me up in his field of magic. It felt warm and pleasant this time instead of a sharp pain in my head. It almost felt like I was being hoisted up on a very soft pillow and being moved ever so carefully.

“Alex come on wake up. Please don’t be dead,” pleaded Jack as he poked my cheek with a hoof which I swatted away with my hand... or hoof. I slowly began to open my eyes to see a black aura enveloping me as Jack flew above me watching me slowly awaken.

“What did I miss and when did Shadow have magic?” I asked with a raspy voice, as I felt the inside my mouth for the first time. It was long and my teeth all felt flat like molars instead of my sharp incisors I had grown used to.

“Oh thank Celestia you're alive and well, that and my horn was just hidden behind my mane,” Shadow said as we entered what seemed to be a common room where I was placed on a dirty old couch. I lied on the couch very strangely as my arm… I mean forelegs folded towards my body. It felt awkward for a moment but my new pony brain reassured me that this was the norm from now on.

“Why wouldn’t I be alive and well?” I asked as I began to look over my body. I was a pale navy blue and I could see my mane running down my neck, it was bright red and a lighting blue streak running close to my neck.

“Well we found you half way through conversion with your clothes still on so we had to cut you free from your clothes with your knife. Hay we weren’t even sure if you were going to live, you were asleep for an hour after you changed.” Shadow said nuzzling me as I slowly brought myself to a sitting position shakily.

“Yeah, we were afraid you died mid conversion but Shadow helped you get through it with some healing magic,” Jack said, as he landed near me and hugged my long neck.

“Well thanks for staying with me… I guess.” I said as I looked at my friends, but I felt something in my heart was missing and my face wore the sorrow.

“Alex, what’s wrong?” asked Shadow as he sat next to me and put his forearm around me.

“I made a deal with the devil so I could exact my revenge. Hay, I even traded my species for an… an animal,” I said as the word ‘animal’ made me feel unpleasant.

“Alex you’re talking crazy again, you’ll love being a pony and not an animal,” Shadow said hugging me. I could feel the pain almost go away but I still felt unpleasant with my situation.

“I want out of this…” I said as I pushed Shadow away with my hoof.

“Alex, you can’t turn back into a human, and even if you did you have nowhere to go.” Jack said,

“No, I want to get out of Earth and away from this place. I’m tired of running and fighting, I just want to live my life in peace and not in fear of somepony coming into my house and killing me because of my ideals.” I said as I stamped a hoof on the couch.

“Well there’s one problem. When you joined the PER you signed on for a commitment of two years of helping the chapter ponify Australia.” Shadow said as I felt my ears fall flat against my head and a sadness engulfing me. “But there were a lot of ponies who didn’t wake up and Jack and I never did find you after we separated.”

“Thank you Shadow,” I said as I gave Shadow a massive bear hug nearly strangling him.

“Now come on, let’s get you to Equestria,” He said as my stomach let out a big growl, “Well maybe after some lunch. So up on your hooves and let’s get you some food.”

“Umm… how do I walk?” I asked as Jack and Shadow helped me to my hooves.

“Well, I found it that if I just put one hoof in front of the other it just came,” Jack said as he demonstrated by trotting around the room.

“Well alright, here I go-” I said as I was quickly introduced to the ground. I felt Shadow’s magic pull me back up to my hooves and a small giggle from Jack.

“Try it again; nopony gets it on the first go, try again.” He said as he pushed me forward a bit with his hoof.

“Hey quit that,” I said as I turned around and trotted up to him. “Wait did I just walk?”

“Works like a charm,” Shadow said to Jack as I trotted around the room with my new found power of walking like everypony else. “Now come on and let’s get you some food.”
===
We exited the commons and all around me were ponies talking to each other or showing how to walk like ponies. Everypony I passed were happy with big smiles on their faces, they didn’t even share a thought that they were once human like I was a moment ago or that the ponies that were helping them were the ones that turned them into the state they were in, and did it with force.

There I go again. These ponyisms were annoying but I guess that’s what everypony says now, but it still was strange how I knew these instantaneously without any prior knowledge of them.

We just trotted pass them but I heard a small filly crying somewhere in this maze of corridors.

“I’ll catch up with you guys later,” I said as I began to follow the sound ignoring my friends as they asked me where I was going.

I kept on following the noise until I came to a small sage green filly crying alone in a corner near one of the fire exits. I trotted up to her and sat next to her and put my foreleg around her and gave a big smile as she looked up to me with her hazelnut eyes and her shiny silver mane.

“Why are you crying?” I asked as I wiped some tears from her muzzle.

“I… I can’t find my mommy,” She said sniffling, “I was running away from the ponies but I got hit by one of those eggs and fell asleep and woke up as a pony and… and mommy’s all gone.”

She burst into tears but she stopped when I hugged her. She looked up to me with her huge eyes.

“Do… do you think she left me because I am a pony.” She sniffled again as she hugged me tight, like I would have as a colt… I mean boy.

“I don’t know, but let’s get you out of here and find you some food and your mum.” I said as I lied through my teeth. I knew her mother had abandoned her because of her being turned into a pony, but it didn’t mean that I left her there for the PER to take her and ship her somewhere in Equestria or let her fend for herself within the chapter.

She couldn’t walk straight so I let her ride on my back until we entered the cafeteria where a whole plethora of ponies were there feeding on hay and various other fruits and vegetables. I scanned the crowd until I saw Shadow and Jack at a table with some hay which they ate as they talked with each other. I trotted up to them as they gave a quizzical look to the foal on my back.

“So what with the foal on your back?” asked Jack as he slid over a tray with a small pile of hay on it.

“I found her crying in one of the hallways,” I said as I helped her off my back,

“Well does she have a name?” Shadow asked as she played around with a pile of hay that Shadow brought over with his magic.

“Oh my name is Remi,” She said as she continued to play with the hay.

“Okay then Remi, well have some hay because it’s full of yummy goodness for growing foals,” Shadow said as she looked my way for some sort of approval.

“Why don’t you try some?” she asked me as she pushed he tray towards me. All eyes were on me as I slowly bent my head down to grab a mouthful of hay. My brain screamed ‘no’ to me eating it yet my stomach was telling me to eat it because it’s ‘good for me’.

I began to chew and I then began to release the sweet tasty flavour of the hay. It went against everything I knew in my previous life, but this hay was tasty and sweet. I almost began to cry from the pure sweet taste of it.

“I guess it must be tasty then,” Remi said as she took a massive mouthful and began to happily chew as she began to cry tears of joy from the sweet juicy flavour from the hay.

“Well then, I think me and Jack have also figured out a way to get you to Equestria,” Said Shadow as he nudged Jack.

“Oh yeah that’s right, well basicly we’re going to put you on the next boat to Equestria in among some newfoals from the local bureau but were going to have to change to your name so you won’t be found out.” Jack replied,

“Okay, but why do I have to change my name?” I asked as I continued to munch on the hay while Remi was stuffing her face full of hay.

“Well Iron Hoof is very good at tracking down ponies and he also hates ponies who use him to get stuff they want… and humans.” Shadow replied,

“Horsefeathers,” I cursed, “I mean - you know what I mean, but how is this going to keep me out of Iron Hoofs grasp?” I asked as Remi began to munch on my pile of hay.

“Well he’ll be looking for a new foal called Alex and not… Ummm…” Jack said as he looked at me, “Night Shadow?”

“Why not Blue Rune?” I replied as the name popped into my head.

“I get the Blue but why Rune?” asked Shadow as Remi began to look at me quizzically.

“Well in that conversion dream I went into a cavern filled with strange looking symbols, they looked like those runes from one of those old games I used play.” I said as Shadow’s eyes livened up.

“Cave with runes?” he asked as his face lit up like a Christmas tree.

“Yeah it was right under a castle in the mountains, why?”

“Well there’s this old story about powerful mages called the ‘Runic Order’, who are said to be the personal mages of Celestia and also the ponies that started Celestia’s school for gifted unicorns.” Shadow began,

“So what does this have to do with the cave I saw?” I interrupted him,

“I’m getting there, but as I was saying. It’s rumoured that the new initiate are taken to a cave below Canterlot to bring them into the Order and the cave is filled with runes that draw the incites toward the rune that expresses them the most. So that leaves the question… were you drawn to a rune?” Shadow asked as all eyes at the table were drawn to me again.

“Yes… but what does this have to do with me getting to Equestria?”

“Well it might determent how powerful of a unicorn you become, but first let’s get you on that boat with Remi,” He said as Remi’s eyes lit up.

“I get to go to Equestria?” she squealed,

“Sure thing kiddo, but first let’s get Jack here to help you pack a saddle bag of things for the journey.” Shadow said as Jack led Remi away from table and out of earshot, “She doesn’t have anypony to rely on does she?”

“No, her mother ran away when we attacked. She has nopony to look after her and well… she needs a family, Shadow,” I said with great sadness.

“Why don’t you take care of her? I mean she seems to like you and you seem good with foals.”

“Are you sure?” I said in disbelief, “I’ve never had a foal to look after let alone siblings.”

“Don’t worry you’ll be fine and besides do it for her, she needs a family,” Shadow pleaded.

“Alright… I mean she is adorable… and I guessed I would be a father someday,” I said beginning to imagine what my future would be like, to say the least it was going to involve seeing what magical spells I could create with my horn.

“Come on let’s get that saddle bag you left at the office,” Shadow said as he hurried me out of the room.

“Can’t we just get one from here?” I asked as he began looking behind his back and looked scared out of his mind. “Are you alright because you look like you saw a ghost?”

“Yeah, we just better get moving if we want to make sure no other PER pony sees you. Makes it a whole lot easier to disappear.” He said as we began to trot down the hallway towards the sound of a filly giggling.

“So after the boat where do I go? What do I do? Hay, I don’t even know how to be a pony, I’ve only been one for what - An hour or so?” I asked pondering how I was going to be like everypony else without the knowledge to do so.

“I’ll think about it, but do you have family on the other side that would be able to help you out?” he ask as I could almost hear the gears grinding in his head to calculate my… our escape as I looked at Remi giggling as Jack tried to fasten a pair of saddlebags to her.

“Hehehehe stop that – that tickles,” She said giggling as she looked up to me, “Oh hi again Runey, so I guess I’ll be going to Equestria soon.”

“Well… there’s a problem, you're still a little foal,” I said ruffling her mane gently, “And well you’ll have nopony to look after you. So I was wondering if you wanted to come with me to Equestria and maybe live with me.”

“Umm… Well,” She said rubbing her chin clumsily with her foreleg nearly falling over, “Okay, but only if I can ride on your back and you have to carry my saddle bags too.”

“Well you got yourself a deal, but we got to leave soon so get ready.” I said as Jack released the saddle bag and threw it at me, which I caught with my face.

“Yay, I’m going to Equestria!” she sang as she bounced around in circles.

“Alright kiddo, so Jack got my stuff ready?” I asked Jack as I clumsily slung the hoop of the bag around my neck before it lifted off and fastened to my back.

"Give me a sec,” he said as he flew and pulled out a dusty pair of saddle bags that smelt like grape.

“Is that the bag that I-?” asked before they were fastened to me as I almost felt the weight of both the bags.

“I grabbed them when we were carrying you heavy flank around here, but it’s got all the Equestrian essentials,” he said in an announcer’s voice.

“Oh? What does it have?” I dared ask,

“It’s got a toothbrush, toothpaste, two brushes for your mane and coat, soap, fifty bits which you and Remi have to share, shampoo, a pillow, a blanket and a pamphlet explaining what life will be like as a pony from now on-” Jack said before being cut off by Shadow.

“But I don’t think you’ll really need that so I’ll just give you this.” He said levitating out an old looking book with Equestrian symbols which seemed more legible than the last time I saw Equestrian written language.

“What is that?” I asked as it floated into my pair of bags.

“It’s ‘My first spells’ book for unicorn foals, but it’s no substitute for a real magic teacher so I’ve written a name of a pony that helped me when I was at the bureau with my magic,” He said as he fastened the buckle and levitated Remi on my back.

“Reminds me of boot camp with all this stuff I have to carry,” I joked to the group as we began to trot to an exit.

“Well get used to it because you're now my personal chauffeur,” She giggled as I continued to trot with her wriggling around my back.

“Well don’t get so used to it, once we hit Equestria you’re not always going to be riding my back,” I groaned as we exited the building into the sun which was slowly setting. It no longer burned me like it did even when it was going down, I didn’t feel the harsh heat bearing down on my skin but only a warm sensation enveloped my pale blue coal.

“Come on we got to get to the bureau before daybreak,” said Jack as we trotted towards the crumbling ruins of Brisbane.
===
Authors Note: So close yet so far, but time to get a move on with writing so see you at the end and also sorry if it feels rushed but that's the way it played out in my head... sorry.
> Chapter Seventeen: Home Stretch 
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


The Conversion Bureau: The Land Downunder
By Da Bunnana King


Chapter Seventeen: Home Stretch
===   
We trotted through the crumbling buildings that were scars of when the world was thrown asunder when China spread its Communist ideals through Asia and the Pacific islands. The ones who didn’t conform were crushed or became experiments in what the scientist created. Sadly, Australia was one of the rare nations that had a natural supply of raw resources and natural fuels; we had enough land for factories to be created to spit out tanks, guns, ammunition, explosives, and planes. Hay when push came to shove most of the Australian Special Forces just let the factories run and stole the shipment. Smart idea but many died in the factories.

These buildings were destroyed by bombs and artillery shells in order to destroy communications and an eye on advancing forces, but the shelling also opened up new tactics.

“Sniper!” I yelled as a patch of dust kicked up in front of me nearly causing me to rear up in fright. Shadow and Jack scattered and I galloped to a smouldering building. I placed Remi down and struggled to get the bags off; I looked at her and saw terror in her eyes. It broke my heart to leave her like this but there was a mad man somewhere in our path to freedom. I hugged her tight and prayed to Celestia that whatever attacked us left us.            

“Runey?” asked Remi as I held her tight to me.

“Yes, Remi?” I asked back as I held her tight and began looking for anything that would be the shooter. I swear I can hear him moving but it was muffled by our hearts pounding, and my fear overwhelming all my senses.           

“Are we going to be okay?”

“We are, but let’s be quiet so the bad man goes away,” I said as I could almost hear his footsteps approaching me.

They were heavy yet muffled amongst the rubble. I could hear his boots grinding the stone and moving small pebbles in front of his path. I could almost hear him breathing as he approached us, I could hear the rounds in his pocket clink against each other.

The footsteps stopped right in front of us, he was in front of us but he didn’t seem to see Remi or I huddling in the corner in pure terror. He chambered another round into the rifle letting the spent round fall towards the ground giving an all horrifying chink noise as it hit. His breaths were heavy and they smelt of tobacco and rum.           


He grumbled to himself and began to walk away, grinding the small pebbles that lined his path. I breathed a sigh of relief which man him stop in his tracks and turn around.

“I know you're there, pony,” he said in a crackly voice as he advanced towards Remi and me.

Terror gripped me once again as his feet were in front of us again and his long arm stretched out and grabbed me by the mane.

He hoisted me to his face which reeked of tobacco and sweat. His white skin was covered with grime and dirt with a long gash down the right side of his face. The scar blinded him in one eye causing it to cloud over blocking the bright blue eyes.

“So you thought you could sneak up on me and try to ponify me?” he asked as I struggled to free myself.

“Let me go, please.” I pleaded as I could faintly hear the soft swishing noise of wings beating against the air.

“No, I don’t think so and don’t think your Royal Guard friends can help you either.” He said as I could feel the air softly blow my mane.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about, but please let me go,” I pleaded again as his iron like grip ceased on me as I dropped to the ground.

Behind the unconscious sniper was a tan pegasus sporting a reinforced combat vest modelled his equine physique. He had a short well groomed brown mane and light orange eyes, but the feathers on his wings were a sandy yellow color.

“Are you alright son?” he asked in a Southern accent.

“Yeah, I’ve been through worse, but thank Celestia you got here in the nick of time otherwise Remi would be an orphan.” I said as I went back to the terrified foal and hugged her hard letting her know she was going to be alright, “But who are you anyway?” I asked as I placed Remi on my back.

“They call me Sandstorm and I’m one of the guards that goes out on recon from the Bureau that’s not so far from here.” Sandstorm said as he picked up our saddle bags,

“Well I can’t begin to thank you enough for saving me but you came from a bureau not so far from here?” I asked as I began to formulate a plan to get to Equestria myself for I was sure that Shadow and Jack had fled when the sniper attacked me or when Sandstorm came.

“Yes indeed, but may I ask what two newfoals are doing here by themselves?” he pressed.

“Well, you see,” I began as I began to improvise a background on the spot, “I came out here to try and get to the docks to hop aboard a boat to Equestria but I ran into this man.”

“I see, but why through old town?”

“It’s the quickest way to the docks from Spring Hill.” I said as I pointed to the west to a large hill with many housing commission buildings on them.

“I see, so may I ask what your names are?”

“My name is Blue Rune and the filly on my back is Remi, my little foal.” I said confidently,

“I see. Well then mister Rune, if you would like I can escort you to the docks where a boat to Equestria should be waiting for the newfoals that come out of the bureau every day or so.” he proposed as he slung a saddle bag on his back.

“I would like that very much, seeing as you know your way around the place better than I.” I said as we began to trot downhill towards the heart of the destroyed town, which was rumoured to have the elite of the elite living there in high-rises. Why they lived in a smouldering wreck of a city beats me but I couldn’t care as I could almost smell the salt from the sea.
===
I stood there on the dock alongside Remi who was staring at the large sail boat that had many ponies on the deck moving boxes or cleaning the deck itself. To say the least it was a large well built boat reminiscent of the old trading boats from the medieval ages.

“Well this is where we part ways sir and your new life begins in Equestria.” Sandstorm said as he secured the two saddle bags to me. “But talk to Captain Saltwater before settiling down into a cabin just to tell him he’ll have an extra passenger.” He said as he trotted away to a gleaming white bureau amongst the large shiny high-rises that surrounded it.

“Won’t he be mad?” I asked before he unfurled his wings.

“No, this is very common for ponies to board ships without any prior notice, but I have to get back to the bureau for a report so goodbye my friends and safe travels!” he shouted as he flew towards the bureau.

“Come on Remi, let’s get on that ship,” I said as we trotted up the gangplank.

“Yay we’re going to Equestria!” she cheered as I approached a light blue stallion with a small picture of a ship as a cutie mark.

“Umm excuse me, would you happen to be the captain of this ship?” I asked as he turned around to reveal a dark blue beard on his chin that covered most of his muzzle and chin.

“I would be the captain of this fine ship yarg,” He said in a voice that sounded far to reminiscent of a pirate.

“I see, well I would like to head to Equestria on this vessel if that could be possible.” I stated as I could almost hear Remi giggling at the old stallion’s beard.

“Sure thing, just put yer baggage below and we’ll be setting sail for Equestria and we’ll be there by sun rise tomorrow, yarg.” He said as he pointed to a door on the aft of the ship.

“Thank you, come on Remi.” I said as I herded Remi towards the door as I could hear the gangplank be pulled away from the ship.

We trotted to the first cabin which was located below the ship’s deck; it was decent sized for a ship’s cabin having two hammocks and a large wardrobe to one side with yellow seashell wallpaper. I tossed the saddle bags inside the wardrobe while Remi attempted to climb up into a hammock.

“Can I have a helping hoof?” she asked as I lifted her up with my head.    

“There you go, now we’ve had a long day so I think it’s time for some well-deserved rest,” I said as I struggled to get into the hammock.

“But I’m not tired,” she whined while yawning.        

“Yes you are and all little foals need their rest to become big and strong.” I said as I began to relax into the canvas hammock.

“Alright-y then, goodnight Runey,” she said as I could hear her beginning to snore.

“Goodnight Remi,” I said as I drifted into the first night of blissful sleep I have had in years as the ship silently sailed through the night towards the ever growing bubble that was Equestria, our new home where we could start new lives as true Equestrians.


The End


===
Authors Notes: Well here we are. At the end of a long rode for this fic that I have been pouring most of my waking hours into, but I would like to take a moment to thank all those people from the IRC and skype that have helped me correct my grammar throughout and given me the encouragement to continue writing it. I also want to thank all those who tracked this and commented in the comments about this crazy story that I made one day during a long study session of biology during my final exams. So thanks and hopefully I will write more of the adventures of Blue Rune and Remi in Equestria or more TCB fics (Like that isn’t expected), so I look forward to the angry comments about grammar in the fics to come. Thank you.
-Da Bunnana King
> Chapter what ever the number that comes after seventeen
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

So, I guess you were expecting another chapter in the thrilling adventure of Blue Rune, well guess what and not it's not Braeburn or the potion, but it is really good. So if you have some form of Central nervous system they you would of guessed it, it's a sequel, so click out and watch the story continue to unfold.

A new beginning
-DBK