Teacup, Down On The Farm

by Chatoyance

First published

Years after the last human is Converted, a Newfoal must face that the past never truly vanshes.

Set in the Conversion Bureau universe during the years after the last human is Converted, Newfoal Teacup faces the fact that however much she tries to fit in, the fact of once having been human must always set her apart.

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1. Knock At The Door

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Lost In The Herd: Four

Teacup
Down On The
Farm

By Chatoyance

Chapter One: Knock At The Door

A hoof pounded insistently at the front door. Mister Provender didn't seem to want to deal with it. “Let'm come back in the mornin'” he grumbled before drifting off again. The pounding grew louder. Somepony would have to deal with it. Missus Provender was very awake now, so she rolled out of bed, stood up, flicked her tail at her lazy stallion husband, and ambled downstairs. What was so confounded important at this time of night?

Outside her door was a large cart, and an impatient official. He was from the Newfoal Assistance And Relocation Administration. He was on a tight schedule, and he wasn't at all happy to have to wait in the snow.

Missus Provender hadn't reckoned she would have any troubles, when she had signed up for a newfoal. The extra income from the Royal Treasury for 'Newfoal Assistance' was certainly welcome. She didn't know what dealing with a newfoal would be like, but she felt she could handle pretty much anything. Besides, it was well understood that the Conversion Bureaus in the Human World trained and prepared newfoals before they ever set hoof in Equestria proper. She reckoned that the whole thing was basically like the Crown paying her to enjoy free help on the farm. It sounded almost too good to be true.

Her newfoal was delivered in the middle of the night, in the middle of winter, without so much as a letter beforehand.

It came, therefore, as a bit of a shock, when she found that the newest critter on her farm not only didn't know how to speak the language, but could barely walk. The poor creature had been part of the last rush, the final effort to convert as many of the last remaining humans as possible before Zero Point occurred.

'Zero Point' was a mighty fancy way to call the last moment where there was any of the Human World left before Equestria swallowed it up like a filly with her favorite ice cream. Apparently Equestria was collidin' or smacking into or otherwise running roughshod over the human critter's home, and it had taken eight or so years to happen. The final hour had passed, but before that time, the humans had worked real hard to get all of their kind turned into ponies who still hadn't been turned into ponies yet. Apparently it was a mad scramble, and not all of the critters understood the danger - there had been a heap of humans all trying to run away, only they had nowheres to go! They were like goats panicking inside a barn on fire, running around yet never managing to notice the open barn door right in front of them.

In the end, the last traces of the human's strange world had been engulfed by Equestria, vanishing forever from the cosmos in which it lay. Not all of the human things had made it to Equestria. It was a terrible tragedy. But most had been saved, welcomed by the Princesses into Equestria with open hooves.

And right here, right now on her kitchen floor was one of those very creatures, rescued at the last minute and converted into a proper Equestrian no different, she'd been assured, from any other pony in the realm. The 'Newfoals' had a lot to offer Equestria, supposedly - they were a creative, inventive lot, with strange notions that somehow could benefit Equestria if only folks would give 'em a chance, but the only part of it all that mattered to her was that now she had a new income source, and a new working mare on the farm. But, now, things didn't look as good as she had pictured them when she had first signed up.

The poor newfoal filly didn't even have a name. At least not one that Missus Provender could discover.

When the unsteady, milk-white Earth Pony was dropped off, the newfoal administrator had explained that these last minute converts needed extra care and attention, because they had to be rushed to Equestria right before 'Zero Point', and there had been no time to train them. Missus Provender pointed out that such extra care and attention naturally demanded extra compensation, an argument that gained her a disgruntled snort, and a sharp glare.

So now she didn't have a working mare so much as a baby to raise. Typical. Nevertheless, this was something she knew she could handle, having already raised three foals back in her younger days with Mister Provender. Besides, if she trained this newfoal right, then she could relax knowing with certainty that her new farm mare would do things the right way.

The pale newfoal mare lay on a thin, institutional blanket in Missus Provender's kitchen. Although the former human was not by any means a child, she quivered like one, and she could not manage to stand. She seemed confused and kept slipping in and out of consciousness. The newfoal administrator had mentioned that the mare had been sedated with some Human World potion or some such nonsense, and it would take her time to recover.

Missus Provender ambled to her shelves, and used her teeth to take down a nice warm comforter. She took it to the shivering mare on the floor and covered her with it. It was a little cold, being the winter months and all, and it seemed the kindly thing to do.

“There ya go, little one” The newfoal mare was not little, but Missus Provender didn't know what else to say, and in any case she figured that the tone of her words might be calming. The soft words seemed to work, and the wobbily newfoal looked up at her with unfocused sapphire blue eyes, which gradually closed. The mare's head drooped to the floor, violet curls of mane draping over the blanket. Almost instantly she fell asleep.

Missus Provender pulled the comforter up closer to the newfoal's head. She took one last look at her new guest, and then trotted up the wide stairs to bed.

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

Bertilda, the Provender's prize rooster, woke, as usual, the two elder farmers, and they set about their morning rituals. As she clopped down the stairway, Missus Provender, suddenly remembered the newest member of her farm. There on the kitchen floor still slept the mare she had been made to take in the previous night. She thought immediately of waking her - morning is always early on the farm - but then recalled that this was a newfoal, a converted human creature.

Missus Provender knew very little about the humans and their world, but she reckoned that changing form from one type of creature to another type of creature probably wasn't an easy thing to go through. She felt pity for the tousle-maned lump on her floor, and decided to let her sleep. The poor thing probably needed time to recover. Besides, letting the newfoal sleep would allow her time to make breakfast and give some thought to how to deal with the situation in general.

Mister Provender clomped wearily down the stairs as Missus Provender set about baking biscuits. Biscuits were a staple at Provender Farm, and Cornflower Provender, the matriarch of the best darn little farm in all of South Withers prided herself on making the best darn biscuits in the county. She had a blue ribbon to prove it, which she had won years ago, back when she and mister Provender were still raising their three daughters, and they still ran the county fair out of Greater Fetlock, back before it was moved to Hoofington.

Mister Provender, at his usual hay-bale by the window, looked out over the round, wooden table, at the sleeping mare on the kitchen floor. "Cornflower!"

"What, I'm makin' yer breakfast!"

"Cornflower!"

"I said I'm makin' breakfast, it'll be done in a moment!" Missus Provender was laying out disks of dough on her favorite pan, tapping them flat with a practiced hoof.

"There's somepony sleeping in our kitchen!"

It took Missus Provender a moment to recall that Mister Provender hadn't been awake enough to know anything about the night before "That's our newfoal. From the Bureaus? I signed up for one a couple months ago?"

"She's no foal!" roared Mister Provender.

"SHHHH! You'll wake her!" The biscuits were in the oven now, and so Missus Provender ambled over to the table "I didn't say she was a new foal, I said she was a 'newfoal', one of them converticated human creatures turned into one'a us. That's just what they call 'em, Durum!"

"Alright, Cornflower, ya ain't got to get all snippy with me. Shucks. I know what a dern 'Newfoal' is, I just weren't expecting one on our floor is all."

"They delivered her last night. Remember? All the racket at the door?"

"Nope." Durum Provender had finally given a single-word response, and after long years with the old stallion, Cornflower knew he wouldn't be any more bother. For now.

While Mister Provender sat sucking his teeth at the newfoal on the floor, Missus Provender set out feed bowls and cups. She briefly thought about putting out a third bowl for the new mare, but since the mare seemed to be sleeping so soundly, she figured she could deal with such things later, if the poor thing did awaken. The smell of biscuits had a way of waking up ponyfolk, or so it had always been around Provender Farm. If the newfoal was likely to wake up, the biscuits would do it.

Mister Provender sipped apple juice from his cup. Durum had to have his apple juice in the morning, or he would be a caution the rest of the day. He was like that, set in his ways, and for Missus Provender time was measured in biscuits and rooster calls and the first cup of apple juice in the morning.

The smell of biscuits baking filled the roomy kitchen. A subtle morning magic, Cornflower Provender's prize-winning biscuits set Mister Provender's stomach rumbling, and his nostril's twitching. Missus Provender studied the sleeping newfoal as she waited for the timer to chime. Surely enough, the white mare's nostrils were twitching just like Durums did, and Cornflower felt a rush of pride that her biscuit magic worked even on bodily trans-converticated creatures from another world.

The newfoal mare opened her eyes. She looked around, first at Missus Provender's hooves, and then at her face. The newfoal began wildly looking around after that, and Missus Provender reckoned that the mare was probably frightened a little, at being in a new place.

Cornflower folded her legs and lay down in front of the newfoal mare. She looked as kindly as she could, staring into the deep, blue eyes of the creature. It looked like any ordinary mare, about just after young adulthood, but with no Mark on her flank. Guess they don't have Marks in that other world, Missus Provender thought. Or maybe she'll get her's later, now she's here. "Shhh..... Shhh... it's all right honeycake, I'm makin' biscuits, if'n yer hungry. I'm right here, and everythin's gonna be alright."

It was clear the newfoal didn't understand a word of Equestrian, just as the Bureau pony had said, but Cornflower knew how to deal with children, and she reckoned that this here was something like a child, being new and all, so her kindly tone and gentle eyes spoke the universal language of comfort. Cornflower gave the newfoal a kindly nuzzle, once she saw the mare relax, and then scrabbled up to check on the biscuits. A glance back assured her that the newfoal mare was indeed interested in biscuits, so she got another bowl out.

The newfoal stayed put, following Missus Provender with her eyes whatever she did. Like a puppy, thought Cornflower. Guess I do have a child to raise after all. Oh well. The biscuits were done, and soon the aroma flooded the kitchen like sunshine for the nose.

The nameless newfoal gobbled biscuits eagerly. It was clear she was very hungry. Missus Provender put down a bowl filled with apple juice and another with water. The newfoal was powerful thirsty, too, it seemed. For now, the mare crawled on her belly, as best she could, there was no doubt that she would need help learning how to stand, and walk.

"Durum?" Missus Provender gave him a determined look "I need you to take care'a things today. It looks like I got me a grown-up child to tend to!"

"Yup." Said Mister Provender.

2. Her Name Is Teacup

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Lost In The Herd: Four

Teacup
Down On The
Farm

By Chatoyance

Chapter Two: Her Name Is Teacup

The violet-maned mare was a little slow to learn. Cornflower started with the basics, just as she would have with a foal of her own. It was a might strange teaching a mare like it was a foal, but, she remembered, only a short time ago this mare was some strange critter from a scary, dangerous world. Cornflower reckoned that it couldn't be easy to try to become a proper, normal pony after that, and she wouldn't have it said of her that Cornflower Provender lacked pity for them that were worse off.

She had the befuddled mare up and trotting around the kitchen by the middle of the first day. Cornflower, Missus Provender, reckoned that all foals are born with the knowledge of how to stand and walk, so this newfoal couldn't be all that different. It just took a little time and encouragement for any young'n to get their hooves on the ground.

The mare seemed happy to clop around the lower floor of the farmhouse, but there was no getting her up the stairs yet. Missus Provender resigned herself to having a makeshift bed in the kitchen for awhile, so she laid out another comforter and brought down a pillow from the guest room. When she got downstairs with the pillow, she was pleased to see the newfoal trying to straighten the impromptu bed as best she could. She was a bit clumsy, but there was no doubt she wanted to help. That was a good sign.


Illustration by Shai-hulud_16

Missus Provender tried to get the mare to go outside before the Princess lowered the sun, but again her guest balked at the stairs out, as well as the ice and snow. It made sense, if indoor stairs were too difficult for the newfoal, then slippery outdoor stairs would be even more intimidating. Cornflower felt foolish then, it should have been obvious. Just gettin' old I guess, she thought to herself.

The newfoal was clearly interested in the world outside though, and stood at the door staring at the farm, and the hills behind, sniffing the cold air for all she was worth. It was as if she had never seen a farm before. This was getting the room cold, though, so Cornflower nudged her in the flank, moving her back into the kitchen, so she could close the door.

The mare followed her everywhere, staring intently at whatever she did as if it were the most amazing thing in the world. While she set about her chores for the day, Cornflower constantly talked to the mare, hoping some words might stick. Also, she had to admit, it was kinda nice to have someone about the place during the day, while Mister Provender was out tending to the livestock. It reminded her of the days when her daughters were still home, days filled with laughter and an endless series of fusses and messes, which in retrospect, she missed a lot more than she ever reckoned she would.

The newfoal mare tried to talk back to her, using whatever language they speak in strange critter land, but none of her new guest's words meant anything to her. Missus Provender went about her tasks, the two of them close and chattering to each other in different languages. It was a might silly, Cornflower felt.

In the early afternoon, Cornflower liked to have a cup of tea. She had Durum get her tea whenever he went into Withers, and she was cross if he should forget. She decided to see if newfoals liked tea, and so set out cups for them both.

The newfoal had some trouble at first, perching on a hay-bale seat by the table, but soon she was sitting nicely enough. She seemed both fascinated and troubled by the teacup Cornflower put down in front of her. When the newfoal put her hooves up on the table, clearly trying to pinch the cup between them, Cornflower stopped her, and motioned for her to put her hooves back down. This seemed to further confuse the poor creature, and for a moment it seemed as if she was going to cry. Cornflower couldn't make any sense of this. Maybe human critters ate with their hooves or something.

While the tea was steeping, the newfoal was going on in her peculiar language. She seemed excited by the teapot, by the cups, and by the situation. It seemed to Cornflower as if the newfoal was familiar with it all, somehow. She had heard that the world the newfoals came from was somehow linked to Equestria, perhaps they had tea there. If they had tea, then they couldn't be all bad, she decided.

The newfoal was trying to lift the cup by the handle. She had learned not to use her hooves on the table, and had seen Cornflower bring the tea things to the table in her teeth. The newfoal had grasped the handle of the teacup in her mouth with some effort and was lifting it. It was a good thing there was no tea in the cup, because if there had been, it would have been all over the table by now. Cornflower figured she had better show the mare how to properly use a cup.

Cornflower caught the mare's attention and said "That's a teacup. Teacup. Let me show ya how to use it." Cornflower lowered her head, and lifted her upper lip in an exaggerated way to show the newfoal how she used her teeth. She clamped the lip of the cup between her upper and lower jaw, then lifted it up. She held it a spell, and even shook her head a twitch to show that she had the cup held firmly. Next she tilted her head back a might, and made a slurping sound with her lips. Finally she lowered the cup to the table and set it down.

The newfoal mare looked at her own cup, then at Cornflower, and appeared to be considering. She duplicated the behavior Cornflower had demonstrated to her. Then she set her own cup down. It wobbled and fell over, so she nibbled at it until it stood upright again.

"Teacup. Tea-cup." Missus Provender intoned. "Go ahead, you try it. Say Teacup."

Suddenly the mare blurted out, in perfect Equestrian "TEACUP!".

"Yes!" It was her newfoal's first word, and Missus Provender could not be prouder "Yes! Teacup! That's right. Teacup! Very good!" It felt like she had a daughter at home again. Warm memories filled her mind.

The newfoal seemed very proud of herself. "Teacup!" she repeated, and put a hoof to her chest "Teacup!" Then she added a string of words from her own language that made no sense. Next she pointed at Cornflower and surprised her by saying "Cornflower!"

"I guess you've been payin' more attention than I gave ya credit for." Cornflower was happily surprised. She used a hoof to gesture at herself "Cornflower!" Then she pointed her hoof at the newfoal.

The mare responded "Teacup!"

"No, I wanted your name. Your name, honeycake." Cornflower gestured again "I'm Cornflower, and you're..."

"Teacup!" The mare pointed at Missus Provender "Cornflower!" Then she pointed at the tea cup in front of her and said a word in her own language. After that she rattled on a bit, nothing of which made any sense at all.

"Oh dear." Missus Provender poured tea into the two cups. "I guess we'll just call you 'Teacup' then. Here, have some tea, Teacup."

Teacup looked down at the tea and called it something in her own language. "Cornflower?" Teacup was now staring intently at Missus Provender with a glad expression on her muzzle "Teacup...." She paused a moment, and then hugged her front hooves to her chest "...Cornflower." The newfoal looked grateful, that was the only word for it.

"You're welcome, honeycake." Cornflower sipped her tea.

There was a bit of a mess, but in the end Teacup managed to get some tea down her, and likely had learned how to use cups in the process. As Missus Provender cleaned up afterwards, Teacup looked a might embarrassed. There had been various assorted spills, and one time the newfoal nearly broke her cup when it dropped as she was setting it down. Messes and fusses. "It's OK, Teacup. Shucks, ain't nothin' I haven't dealt with before!" Memories of her daughters flooded back.

Although she wasn't about to fully admit it, maybe having an untrained, refugee newfoal on her farm wasn't such a burden after all. Cornflower hadn't had such a fun day in many a year.

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

Snow fell outside the multi-paned windows of the kitchen. It was obviously a kitchen of some kind, food was prepared there. Tikvah had never seen one made entirely of wood before, and such wood as well! If she had to be a pony, well, this was not so bad. The comforter was warm and soft under her belly, and the nice lady had tucked her in, as she had the previous night, and given her a nuzzle before going upstairs.

Tikvah couldn't help but think of the light gray mare as a nice old lady. That's who she was in her mind. A world of talking ponies, and now she, Tikvah Feinstein, was one of them. She wondered if the human world was truly gone. Had Zero Point already happened? It must have, by now. All of human history, the entirety of the planet earth, swept away like so much dust.

Then again, she thought, maybe it was for the best.

Tikvah had been living, when she was human, in Wilmington, Jersey. Just a ride from Newark, faster if you took the maglev. She had worked as a nanofabricator in the huge plant they had opened - she was one of the lucky 2% in the North American Alliance that had a job at all. After all, 98% unemployment was the norm, but she didn't feel special, just fortunate. She had known somebody that knew somebody. That's how it worked. That's how it always worked.

It was a pretty crappy job, really, but Tikvah was beyond grateful to have it. She took the maglev to work, even though the plant was only a few miles away, because it was safer. It cost a lot to ride the maglev, but that was better than being slashed open and harvested for organs. A lot of that had been happening on the regular routes, but so far the organ thieves hadn't dared the high security of the maglev.

It was nicer, too. The maglev cars were in disrepair, like everything else, but the seats still had covers on them, and that was much better than riding on bare springs.

Nanofabrication was a tedious task. Every day, at the start of her 16 hour shift, a list of morphological parameters would be uploaded to her workstation, and she would begin sorting them into topological groups. Then she performed transforms on the data so that the quantum system could digest it more efficiently. When that was done, she moved to the fabrication center and checked the bins and tanks, topping them up as needed. She was one of only five people in the entire, vast building, each isolated in their own section.

Outside, the streets had been packed with an ocean of the destitute and the dying, makeshift shelters and the endless favela that encrusted the world like cardboard and sheet-metal barnacles. Nineteen billion humans lived on the earth, all but one tenth of one percent of them impoverished slaves working for the most minimal of wages, or simply surviving.

Tikvah felt fortunate to be a 'wage slave'. To say that was not facetious. Her contract, like all employment contracts, was so arranged that no matter what her pay rate, she would always fall deeper in debt to the corporation. Having work meant that she was restricted to purchases from her employing corporation, so all of her food, shelter and power had to come from Eastern Corporate. Fortunately, Eastcorp owned everything that existed in her sector of North America, so all it really meant was that she couldn't buy anything off the hypernet.

Tikvah had to be careful with loading the nanohoppers, because everything she worked with was perilous. She spent much of her day inside a sealed environment suit, but her actual task was pouring something grey into something a different shade of gray. A tear or rip in her thin suit, and it could mean two weeks quarantine without pay, and possible mutilation or death. Naturally, she tried to be careful, but failure to complete her tasks adequately was a firing offense, and of course the debt she was already in for having a job at all would be with her for life. Then, if she was lucky, she could hope for industrial prison, or if unlucky, she could return to the world-spanning favela, and the usual life of sickness and barely surviving.

Actually, her degrees in nanoscience weren't really elite enough to hope for industrial prison. So, it would be the slums if she was ever fired. She'd still have to pay back the corporation, even from there, or end up part of the mandatory organ donator selection pool. She wondered if she should have studied law, or finance, instead.

Her home was a living pod in the Union Park Megacomplex. She was lucky to have it, it was just within her budget. Two meters long by a full meter and a half tall and wide, she had space to stretch out, plus just enough room for a microfridge and her threevee tablet. She slept bent around these items, and she liked to imagine they were friends she was cuddling with. She felt so fortunate!

But the best part was the hatch. Each pod had its own locked hatch. The lock was a quantum lock, and could not be broken by anything short of the might of a corporate entity. Inside her pod, she was safe. She would never be raped again, never lose her other ear, never be beaten, never be hurt while she slept. Her living pod was more than a place to sleep, it was a fortress, a castle, and for the first time in her 34 years, Tikvah knew what it was to feel safe.

When Equestria first rose from the sea, Tikvah didn't really pay it much attention. Her work was demanding, and she only allowed herself a half an hour to surf the hypernet, just enough for half of an old show, before dropping some Noeticin for two hours of concentrated REM sleep. It simply wasn't part of her personal world.

She first discovered her world had changed irrevocably when she lost her job. It was a very strange situation, because not only was she discharged, but everyone at Eastcorp, at every division, everywhere in North America had been fired simultaneously. All debts were cancelled. No severance, no debt, no hope of prison, no nothing. Eastcorp was simply gone. The single, monolithic, unitary industry of the entire east coast had pulled out of North America. No person was employed anywhere in the North East Zone.

There was a cryptic explanation: Due to current events, all employment has been terminated without penalty.

She hadn't heard anything. As far as she knew, nothing was going on, the company had never mentioned anything in their employee bulletins. There had been no mention in the net shows she watched, then again she only watched reruns of old favorites, so there was that. She never bothered with newsfeeds, there was no point - there was nothing she could do about anything, hell, it was all she could do just to stay employed.

Her life had been so insular - pod, food dispenser, maglev, work, maglev, food dispenser, pod - that she had basically missed the last five years. On that last day, she finally met one of her co-workers at the nanofabrication facility, the woman shrieking about something as she ran past her, clearly outside of her normal workspace. Tikvah was lost, her world, her life, everything suddenly destroyed.

In five years the world had changed. With her robotic schedule gone, Tikvah wandered, in shock, away from the secure tunnels that led from work to maglev. For the first time in five years, she found herself above ground, and in her stunned state had forgotten to put on her Resperex breather to deal with the smog and ash.

There wasn't any.

The perpetual smog and ashfall that blackened Wilmington was simply... gone. The vast skyscrapers that towered over the ramshackle favela huts and constructions were as grimy and dark as always, but something impossible glowed behind them. A vast field of blue, a color Tikvah had not seen outside of images on the hypernet, filled the sky. It was the sky. The original sky, which she had read about in her childhood. The sky was supposed to be blue, somehow.

She was breathing easily. As easily as in her living pod, as easily as in her envirosuit. Her lungs almost stung from the raw freshness of the air. She couldn't take it in. It was impossible, insane. The sky was ...blue.

And that is the exact moment she saw her first pegasus, turquoise with a crimson mane, gliding overhead. It was followed by others, many others, and as she felt her sanity failing her, she whipped her head down and crouched low to the ground, hands on the side of her head, staring intently at the crusted plascreet walkway, as if somehow that patch of normality could bring her mind stability.

"Excuse me, are you alright?" The voice was eerily kind, as though it were genuinely concerned. It was a soft voice, high of pitch, and it wasn't asking for money, or demanding her kidneys. Somehow she managed to look up, her curiosity overcoming her fear. She couldn't take much more.

"Do you need help? I'll help you!" It was a peach-colored unicorn, wearing saddlebags and a Jersey Nets baseball cap.

3. The Unpromised Land

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Lost In The Herd: Four

Teacup
Down On The
Farm

By Chatoyance

Chapter Three: The Unpromised Land

The mare was milk white, with a violet mane that swirled over her head and neck. Her name was Teacup, though it had not always been that, and she was learning how to feed the chickens.

"You should give'm a little corn now an' then, an' it don't hurt none to toss 'em the odd vegetable or two. They prefer bugs, o'course, but they likes their feed, and they need a treat now an' then. Every once'n a while we give'm yogurt. That's our secret here at Provender Farm. 'Bout once a week, roughly." Mister Provender was talking slowly, more slowly than usual, because Teacup still had trouble with words sometimes. "Ya got all that?"

Teacup thought hard about how to answer and composed an answer in Equestrian as best as she could. "Give chickens corn. Sometimes. Vegetables. Sometimes. Milk-jelly week once."

Mister Provender frowned at the mare, briefly. "Not 'milk-jelly, yogurt. YO-GURT. This stuff." The aged stallion gestured to a bowl sitting on the hay, all but empty of a creamy, white substance. He pronounced the Equestrian word for the foodstuff once more, carefully, so that Teacup might learn it.

The white newfoal mare mouthed the strange, unearthly Equestrian syllables that she had just heard. Mister Provender snorted and nodded.

Teacup felt frustrated, she never imagined learning a new language would take so long. Of course, she had never imagined ever having to learn a new language. She dipped her head low and sniffed at the bowl. Oh! She knew what that was. It had been available in sealed containers from the food dispenser, back when she had lived in Wilmington. She mentally mapped the Equestrian word for yogurt to Eastern Zone English.

Teacup had learned many things over the past six months. She had finally understood that she had somehow been named after tableware, but felt no inclination to correct the situation. 'Teacup' sounded fairly Equestrian to her, as names went in this strange new land. Missus Provender was named 'Cornflower', and Mister Provender was named 'Durum', which Teacup vaguely remembered was a type of wheat or some other grain. Equestrians seemed to often be named after things or motions or even foods. They didn't take names quite the same way that humans had.

So, considering that she was now an Equestrian herself, and would be for life, Tikvah Feinstein had come to the conclusion that being named after the Equestrian word for a container to drink tea from was fine with her. It sounded pretty to her new ears, and it seemed, for some reason, to make Missus Provender smile. Tikvah Feinstein was gone, and now she must learn to be a white mare named 'Teacup'.

This strange situation did not exactly bother Teacup. In the six months she had been in this new land, in her new body, it had seemed not unlike heaven to her. Everyone - everypony, she corrected herself - had been friendly to her, she always had good things to eat, she never felt afraid, and above all, everything was so incredibly bright and clean.

Gone were the filthy, garbage-piled streets of the megacity of Wilmington. Water was clear, and tasted fresh and pure. The air never burned, green living things grew everywhere, and the only smoke came from the stove in Missus Provender's kitchen, or in the fireplace in the farmhouse, during the three months of winter.

Teacup wanted to learn how to help out on the farm. The farm itself was an exotic, magical place to her. She had never imagined ever being allowed to set foot on one. On earth, all farms had been seized by the corporate government, and were shoot-to-kill security zones. It was illegal to try to grow your own food, even on rooftops. She doubted that would have worked in any case, what with the ash-fall covering everything. There was no ash-fall here, no smog, no clouds of nanodust.

She felt gratitude towards the Provenders. She desperately wanted to please them, for she had come to understand that they had chosen, somehow, to have her there. She felt as if she had been rescued from a nightmare.

Only by comparison could she fully appreciate how much she had hated her life, before. It was terribly strange to live inside such a different skin, and it had taken her some time to come to terms with the fact of it, the reality of no longer being human. But, if that was the price of living in a world filled with life and color and smiles, of chickens instead of organ thieves, well, maybe being human wasn't such an important thing.

Still, adjusting had been difficult, particularly so, for her. When Tikvah had been rushed to the mass Conversion Camps set up after the Bureaus had been closed, thoughts of the Holocaust had terrified her, and for a moment she wondered if she was to be exterminated. But, as it finally dawned on her that those around her were serious about the strange concept of saving the last, lost humans by converting them to Equestrians, and that it was not death that awaited but a strange new life, her fear turned to confusion.

This was not what she understood about the world. She had been taught that the human form was the image of god, and that the Torah was clear on matters of what the world was about, what the future of Man would be, and what, basically, was what. But no Book nor Scroll nor Song had ever predicted the arrival of an alien cosmos out of the Pacific, nor that the End Of Days would finish in alfalfa and hooves. The fact of Equestria not only destroyed her reality, and changed her body, it destroyed her religion, too.

It was impossible to cling to the distant, invisible god of her childhood when two living, talking, visible divine beings made the sun and moon rise and set each day. Suddenly her god had been replaced with goddesses, and they weren't just stories - she could go visit them someday, if she wanted to. The thought terrified her. It was one thing to sing prayers. It was another to sit down to tea with an actual deity.

Then again, if the goddess-princesses were anything like those she had met in the strange dream she had experienced during her transformation, maybe it wouldn't be such a difficult meeting after all.

But one thing was certain; nothing she had ever believed, thought, or held real was true anymore. As best as she could understand, there literally wasn't even an earth anymore. Equestria was the only reality now.

Everyday, Teacup tried her best to accept, with all of her heart, her new life. She worked to make her new body her own.

Wandering the farm, she tried out all of her parts. She had wiggled her ears and tried to walk backwards. She sniffed and nibbled and rolled on her back in the long, sweet-smelling grass by the farmhouse. When she had done that, she had heard laughter from the porch. "You really are just a lil' filly, ain't ya?" Missus Provender often seemed to delight in her efforts to understand her new body. "I used'a love rolling around in the grass like that when I was little. You just go on and enjoy yourself, Teacup. Ain't nobody here gonna worry about how old you are on this here farm."

Teacup had felt a little silly at being caught, but continued for a while anyway. If it made Missus Provender glad or happy in any way, then that was a mitzvah as far as she was concerned. Besides, the grass just felt so good... and it smelled so incredibly nice.

Every morning on the farm meant biscuits, and Teacup was trying hard to learn how to make them. She felt very clumsy, every time she tried, but Missus Provender was very kind, and very patient with her.

"I'm sorry! I'm sorry! Sorry Sorry Sorry!" she repeated over and over when she had dropped her stirring-spoon on the floor for the umpteenth time.

"Aw, shucks, honeycake... it's all right. Jus' settle down, now, an we'll try again, 'kay?"

Teacup felt bad that she seemed to have such trouble using her teeth and hooves the way natural Equestrians did. So, she started practicing in the night, after everypony had gone to bed. This was back during the days before she had finally braved the stairs and been given the guest room as her own.

Teacup, under the light of the moon, had taken out the long wooden spoon and practiced with it, night after night. She tried making stirring motions, practiced taking hold of it with her lips and teeth and setting it down again. She even tried flipping it into the air, and catching it, to see if she could.

One night she had noticed she was being watched from the shadows by the stairs. Missus Provender had come down, probably because she had made too much noise. Teacup dropped the spoon in surprise. Missus Provender stood there for a while with a strange look on her face, albeit a kindly one. "You jus' try so hard, don'cha honeycake?"

That had turned out to be a particularly happy night for Teacup. Missus Provender lit the oil lantern, and set about making them both something not entirely unlike Mexican Horchata, a sweet, warm oat-based drink that she served in mugs. It was delicious, and over that, she had told Teacup about the fillies she had raised, and about her life long ago. She talked about winning a ribbon for her biscuits, and how much fun the fair was, back when. She told about how she met Durum, and how he used to bring her candied daisies when they were first courting.

"Dear me, I've jawed a might long all about myself. I still don't know a thing about you, Teacup." Missus Provender poured them both a little more of the oat beverage "What was your life like back in that world you came from? I ain't never heard tales of life in another world before!"

Teacup started to formulate a response, but then stopped. What could she possibly say to the kindly elder mare? Teacup looked around the clean, pleasant, homey kitchen and thought of her childhood in the favela, eating little else but the guaranteed government ration and the odd roasted mutie-rat. Her first rape, her human ear being cut off for no reason at all. Her new, regenerated, intact pony ear twitched at the memory of her lost human ear.

Even if she could manage to somehow explain what life was like in the human world, about how humans treated each other to Missus Provender, how would that affect her? It wouldn't make her sleep well, that was for sure. And what would she think of a newfoal such as herself, a former human from such a world? How could she even speak of the world of Man, with all of its war, greed, violence and horror?

It would be some kind of sacrilege, some blasphemy somehow, to bring such concepts into a place like Equestria. Even to speak of them seemed poisonous, toxic. Teacup felt deep shame, and sadness, and suddenly she felt more alone than she had ever been in both of her two lives.

She was in a kind of paradise, compared to the world she had come from, and she could never talk about what she had been through to anypony, ever. Inside her was a pain that would never heal, and even to mention it would taint her new existence, and likely make those that accepted her now see her as a monster from a monstrous world. She had tried all her previous life to not be a monster like those around her, but that did not change the fact that she had seen, known, and been touched by a world run by, and for, true monsters.

"I... I no talk. I'm sorry. I'm sorry, Missus Provender. It hurting place. Sorry me." Teacup couldn't look her in the eye. It was too much to cope with, after how happy the night had been until then.

"It's OK, sweetie. You don't need to tell me anythin'." Missus Provender leaned over and gave Teacup a comforting nuzzle. "Let's finish our mugs, and head up to bed, whatcha say?"

Teacup nodded, relieved.

The next years passed easily for Teacup. She had learned Equestrian well enough to pass for a local, though not without a few mishaps along the way. She became competent and useful around the farm, and Missus Provender was clearly glad of her help. Teacup liked working on the farm. She liked planting season, and she enjoyed the harvest. Fresh corn and the best hay and alfalfa and flowers were a constant part of her diet. She discovered a love of baking, and finally managed to make biscuits as good as Cornflower's, an achievement that clearly made the elder mare proud.

Teacup found the world around her green and fascinating. The nearby town of South Withers held interesting shops and tasty treats she had not experienced on the farm. She came to know the names of dozens of local ponies, and became a part of the community. She was known and valued. But somehow, she never truly got close to anypony other than Missus Provender and Durum. And even with them, she only really talked about their days together, the farm, and their lives, never her own.

Missus Provender had taken note of that fact, and found it a might curious. Teacup was such a good mare, always helpful, kind to a fault, honest, friendly, but she was closed. Closed like a stuck door to a dark room. She liked things and had interests, but she never had any friends over, or went to spend time with anypony else. The farm was her life, and while it was wonderful to have such a dedicated farmhoof around, Missus Provender had come, inside her heart, to see Teacup as just a little more than a refugee worker. She had come to see Teacup a little like she was her own filly, somehow.

And it just weren't right for one of her fillies to be all lonely like that. All her own brood had left the farm and made lives for themselves, at the very least they had always had friends about the place, ponies they had crushes on, ponies they eventually got involved with.

Missus Provender could tell that, however happy a face she put on, there was some terrible sadness deep inside Teacup, and it had something to do with her past, which she wouldn't ever talk about.

So Cornflower put her mind to the problem, and started asking around.

Most all the newfoals from the other world had long since moved out to the Great Expansion, far away from the lands close to Canterlot, Hoofington, even Manehattan. As the other world had been devoured by her world, Equestria had somehow grown larger, and now there were endless lands Cornflower had never heard of. All were now properly part of Equestria. Those lands were so vast that there was more than enough room for all the newfoals -and apparently there were a whole lot of them too- to go found new towns and cities in, with space for generations untold beyond that.

That was all too big for Missus Provender to take in, but what did matter to her was that there just weren't many of the newfoals around anywhere nearby anymore. And this was a problem, because Cornflower figured that if her Teacup couldn't talk to her, or to any other natural-born pony, maybe it would help her to talk for a spell with a pony like herself. A pony from that other world. A pony that might have something more in common with whatever was bothering her.

It took Missus Provender three years to track down a likely candidate. In a town called Clydesdale, not all that far away. She finally heard tell that one of its citizens was a newfoal that had stayed behind when all the others had moved on out to the new frontier. The newfoals seemed a restless lot, most of them, and besides there was only so much room in any one place.

But in Clydesdale, there was a newfoal that lived there, and best of all for her plans, that newfoal had started having troubles of her own. As she learned more, Missus Provender found out that those troubles seemed not unlike the kind Teacup was having.

The Clydesdale newfoal was a mare. She had been quite popular up until a few years ago. Then she started seeming sad, and acting more and more withdrawn. While this mare had been very openly social, unlike Teacup, she too never seemed to have any truly close friends. Those that knew of her said she seemed happy on the outside, but that somehow there was a cloud hanging over her, like she was carrying a burden, inside.

By this time it had been ten years since Teacup had come to her farm, and joined the Provender family. And she had truly joined the family, as far as Missus Provender and Mister Provender were concerned. So Cornflower reckoned that it was only right to try to help her more-or-less semi-adopted daughter.

She figured that she would throw a little shindig to celebrate Teacup's tenth anniversary on the farm. And she figured that she might just invite a special guest from Clydesdale to stay a while on the farm and enjoy some hospitality as well as a change of scenery. It would also be part of the payment for her services - the Clydesdale mare specialized in doing parties for ponyfolks, and she figured that hiring a pony that knew how to make a shindig proper would be the perfect cover for getting the two newfoals together.

Missus Provender smiled at the thought. She felt mighty clever, what with all the planning and the searching and the sneaky way of getting the two to talk and all. Cornflower felt like a regular Agent Of The Crown, what with her fancy plan and all.

And maybe it just might help fix her lonely, broken little Teacup.

4. A Yearning For The Lethe

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Lost In The Herd: Four

Teacup
Down On The
Farm

By Chatoyance

Chapter Four: A Yearning For The Lethe

Teacup was surprised to find that it had been ten years since she had arrived in Equestria. It did not seem that so much time had passed. She had been 34 when she had been Converted. Before she completely understood what was happening, she had found herself half-conscious, struggling to take in the full measure of her strange new body. Her transformation had been rushed, for she was one of the last humans to escape the earth before Zero Point, the final instant of Equestria's absorption of her ruined cosmic sibling.

The Earth was dying, it had been dying for a long time. The plague that had killed it was the essence of the monkey mind, curious, whimsical and bright, but also selfish, violent, and ultimately, destructive. Nineteen billion humans, far beyond the carrying capacity of the planet lived squalid and hopeless lives in globe-spanning slums. They were granted bare survival by the virtue of monkey cleverness, molecular machines that could reconstruct waste back into something not entirely unlike food. They had been promised a golden age, a diamond age, but those wonders were, as always, reserved only for the powerful few.

Humanity had never been truly happy, and it had always fought itself, a monkey endlessly punching it's own face for nothing other than spite. It couldn't help itself. The flaw was in the meat. The same thing that made Mankind able to rise up in a hostile universe had left it universally hostile.

But other worlds, other realms, shared the life of the earth in mysterious ways, and throughout history, these other spaces occasionally intersected their co-joined twin. Man had many myths and legends of these moments, but none were ever truly taken as real.

One by one, the other realms drifted away, abandoning their connection to the Earth as the planet was slowly, industrially poisoned. They managed to sever their strange links, and drifted off to unknown fates amidst a vastly larger cosmos unknown to Man.

One last companioning cosmos, however, did not abandon the universe humanity inhabited. Celestia, one of the two divine diarchs that maintained Equestria had made a promise long, long ago, during a perilous visit to earth. The human that had saved her from oblivion had extorted a desperate demand - to save humanity from itself, and from the cruel, heartless, soul-less universe in which it had originated. Thus, many centuries later, Equestria expanded into Human space, and an offer was made: Join us. Become us. Share in our realm, a world not of suffering and struggle, but of harmony and joy.

There was a small price. The monkey mind must be traded in, exchanged for the pony mind. The savage, lone ape must become the herding, peaceful horse. For many, such peace, the very hope and promise of their many religions and dreams and fantasies, suddenly became the greatest threat, now that it had actually become real.

But for the majority, living in the endless suffering the masses had always known for as long as Man had walked the earth, anything, anything was better than the short, brutal lives they had been allotted. They came, in their billions, and with each newly minted soul, Equestria grew, its own realm made vastly larger, and the Earth diminished.

Zero Point, the last moment when the extraversal imposition of the Equestrian cosmos rippled over the shriveling globe, finally dissolved the last works of the savage ape away. In the end, the glimmering bubble that remained where the Earth once had been, shrank back into its exotic realm, like a shining fish submerging in a black, star-lit sea.

Now, there was only Equestria, where two immortal beings of light and shadow literally raised and set the sun and moon each day, and where equinoid sapients trotted across a now endless expanse of Elysian green.

It had been ten years since Zero Point, Ten years since the world Tikvah Feinstein, once of Wilmington, Jersey, Eastern Zone, North American Alliance, Western Corporate Dominion, Earth, had ceased to be. Now and forever, she was Teacup, a pale, violet-maned creature vaguely formed in the shape of an equine, one pony among billions, loyal subject of her royal, living deities, Celestia and Luna of Equestria. This was roughly the tenth anniversary of her second life, off only by two months to allow spring weather, and there was going to be a party.

Missus Provender was not one for parties, being of a more practical mind, so she had sent away to another town for a pony that was said to be very accomplished at them. Teacup felt deeply honored that her tenth anniversary at Provinder Farm was considered to be worth such fuss. She knew that Missus Provender cared for her, but this spoke to her of just how much.

There were many things to do, to prepare for the event. Invitations had to be sent to various ponies of South Fetlock and the farms nearby, all of which had come to know, and respect Teacup over the years. The farm needed sprucing up, as did the farmhouse, because Missus Provender intended to put her best hoof forward - after all, the winner of the blue ribbon for best biscuits couldn't be seen having a party on a dilapidated farm.

Teacup and Mister Provender had repainted all the weathered fences, fixed up and repainted the chicken coop, and spent a week working on the farmhouse. Teacup had become very proficient at the use of tools over the years, and it made her shrink to remember how clumsy and awkward she had been when she had first arrived.

Eventually things came together, though Teacup couldn't really figure out how, and now half a dozen begged and borrowed wooden tables stood out on the great green lawn to the front of the farmhouse. These would be for the guests, and would be piled high with all manner of cakes and pastries and savory dishes too, and of course, things to drink as well. But first, they must be prepared.

Teacup worked together with Mister Provender to lay out “The Fancy Set” of dishes, glasses, cups and bowls. First they placed pretty, flower embroidered tablecloths over the simple, wooden tables. Apparently the tablecloths had been a special purchase for the party, and had come all the way from Manehattan. They had been made by unicorns with the gift of working with fabrics. Missus Provender never did anything half-way.

Teacup regarded the embroidery, and thought just how impossible it would be for an earth pony to do such work, even with tools strapped to their hooves. There were just some things that only unicorns alone could do. But then that was the way of Equestria; three races, three realms of work and ability – sky, land, and... technical, she supposed. Unicorns were technicians, really.

Or, she realized, Nobles, Merchants, and Peasants. There was a touch of the Middle Ages about her country, but in a nice way really.

My country. Interesting, she thought. Equestria was her nation, her country, her allegiance. She realized she felt pride in being Equestrian. She had never felt nationalistic pride in her human life. Only shame... and some anger. This was a new feeling, and she wasn't sure how it sat with her.

Teacup and Mr. Provender gently tugged at the edges and the corners of the tablecloth they were working on with their teeth, trying to get it just right. Eventually they agreed that it seemed to look properly arranged, and went on to the next table. In time, they set about ferrying the dinnerware to the tables, piece by piece. By now, Teacup had gotten used to the un-human acceptance that everything in the world had likely experienced the teeth and lips of some other pony. She thought, briefly, about how the very idea of drinking from a cup mouthed by another would have disgusted her human self.

But then, she noted, she wasn't human, and this wasn't a human world. There was a strange, exotic delight in this for her. She had always favored the strange, and to the part of her mind that remembered being human, being a pony was very strange indeed. This was a world where 'mouth' equaled 'hand', and where disease, as she had known it, had no existence. No one would be dying of hepatitis or tuberculosis here, ever.

For a moment, Teacup felt that it was strange to live in a world where bodily fluids were not fearful horrors, where teeth were the equivalent of hands. She felt shocked by this way of thinking, and like all memories of her past, human life, it jarred her. She liked to imagine she went years between such incidents of human thinking. But these sorts of moments had been happening more often than she realized, and it hadn't been years since the last one, but mere days.

Missus Provender had no idea what it was that bothered Teacup, she had no way of knowing that memories of Earth were what caused her newfoal mare to pause and look troubled, for Teacup never talked about herself. But Missus Provender was a smart pony, and she had worked out that it must be something to do with Teacup's past, and she truly wanted to help her.

Finally, all the place settings had been arranged. Each had a dining bowl, large enough to allow for an Equestrian muzzle to root about in it for 'good bits', a smaller soup bowl, and a nice large glass, cup or mug for drink. Teacup remembered the first time she and Missus Provender had shared tea together, long ago. Though it never seemed to feel appropriate to say it out loud, Teacup loved Missus Provender. In her heart, Missus Provender, Cornflower, was the kind, loving mother she had never known.

Teacup had yet another disturbing memory of Earth. There was no silverware to put on the tables. While spoons existed as a kitchen tool, the idea of tableware for eating simply did not exist in Equestria. Suddenly, bright in her mind, a memory of eating from a food tube with a disposable spork filled her thoughts. Fingers gripped around the utensil, glancing rapidly around the Dispensery for any sign that she should run to the safety of the maglev security area. Muggers and rapists loved the Food Dispenseries. The security cameras had long since been stolen by addicts.

Teacup shook her head. She shook it again, and pounded the grass with her hooves. What was wrong with her today? From the farmhouse porch, Missus Provender sighed. Her poor little Teacup.

Teacup next laid out cloth covers on the fresh straw bales that served as seats around the table. It took some effort to place the pillowcase-like covers over the bales, and more than once she had to fold her legs and lie down on the ground to tug the covers down. 'Bein' Fancy' was hard work. Still, Teacup liked being busy, she was a hard worker by nature. The busier she was, the happier she felt, and the less she had her little 'moments'.

By early evening, everything was ready. While Teacup had been working to set up the tables and arrange all the place settings, others had been helping out with decorating the farm, following the lead of the special pony Missus Provender had brought in all the way from Clydesdale. Missus Provender had explained that the pony was good with parties, but that wasn't the only reason she was coming. She would be a guest for a few days, as she had been feeling down, and maybe a stay in a new place might cheer her up. It was hinted, none too subtly, that it might be nice for Teacup to be especially friendly to her, because the poor dear probably needed someone to talk to.

Teacup still hadn't properly met the new pony, but she had seen her galloping about, tossing a streamer here, or using her teeth and hooves to tie ribbons on parts of the farmhouse. It made sense that Missus Provender would hire a unicorn, they were good with all the fiddly stuff because of having a horn and magic, and some unicorns had spells that could get complex things done, clop, just like that. That said, Teacup couldn't remember seeing the pink-maned, aquamarine pony use her horn even once that afternoon. But she must have, of course. Things got done, didn't they?

The guests began to arrive. Old Mister Withers himself was there, one of his ancestors had founded South Withers long ago. There was Haylee Bales and Alfalfa Sprouts from the feed store. Miss Scarlet arrived, her bright crimson mane shining in the light of Celestia's setting sun, a might clueless as usual, but such a friendly pony. The Toffee twins from the candy shop had come, and many more familiar, local faces mingled and laughed on the wide, sweet-smelling green. So many ponies, Teacup thought. She hadn't realized how many she had actually come to know, until now. She knew the names of more ponies than... she had ever known the names of humans, back before. Then again, back before, it was too risky to be too friendly. You'd only get hurt.

Dinner was lovely. There were all manner of fancy treats and savory dishes, but one was simply a must; Missus Cornflower Provender's Prize Winning Biscuits. A huge platter of them had been set on each of the tables, and Missus Provender had made a point of laying down bright blue cloth under the biscuits, as a reminder of her ribbon at the fair. Teacup giggled at that: Cornflower was a might over-proud sometimes.

It was at the table that Teacup finally was introduced to the visiting unicorn from Clydesdale.

"Howdy and hello! I'm Petal! Petal Confetti, at your service, in this case literally, as I was brought in to help organize things after all. You must be the guest of honor, Teacup! I'm happy to finally meet you. I'm sorry I didn't come say hi earlier, but I kinda got here late and there were a lot of things to do. Plus, not much time to do them in. Woo! You certainly know how to put on a good spread here!"

Petal eagerly craned her neck forward and took one of the golden biscuits from the large serving platter, and set it upon the smaller plate next to her large dinner bowl. Then she repeated the effort, placing the second biscuit neatly beside the other.

“These look just scrumptious!”

"She won an award for those biscuits!" Teacup said proudly, nodding over at Missus Provender. "A bright blue ribbon!"

Missus Provender looked fair to burst at that, and Teacup felt glad that her comment had achieved its goal of making Cornflower happy.

"I hear you're from Clydesdale, Petal?" Teacup took biscuits for herself, and a spot of carrot salad that looked particularly tasty.

"Yep!" Petal swallowed a bite of biscuit "These are really quite exceptional! A gustatory delight!" A few of the local ponies quietly chuckled at Petal's use of words, nobody talked fancy around South Withers.

Teacup looked on, with interest, as Petal took a drink from her glass. Watching her, Teacup recalled her first days with Missus Provender, and imagined herself back then for a moment, as she studied the pony from Clydesdale. Petal took the closer edge of the glass in her teeth, tilting it up so that the lemonade inside could flow through her teeth into her mouth. Closing her lips around the liquid, she swallowed, and then tilted her head down and set the glass neatly on the table. She noticed Teacup staring at her and giggled. “That is just wonderful lemonade, Missus Provender”.

“Jus' call me Cornflower, we ain't all formal down here on the farm.” That wasn't entirely true, Teacup noted to herself, Cornflower tended to like being referred to as 'Missus Provender' most of the time whatever she might say, and she was more than a little reserved most of the time too.

Missus Provender sipped some lemonade herself, and after setting her own glass carefully down, she looked up “Petal, kin I ask you an odd question?”

“Of course, Mis – um, Cornflower. When it comes to answers, I'm just plain full of it!” Petal glanced expectantly around for any reaction to her little jest, but only Teacup chuckled. Only Teacup shared the cultural background required to get that particular joke about being 'full of crap'. It was a mean dismissal that just wouldn't come to a natural pony mind. Missus Provender and her husband just blinked. They knew they had missed something, but had no idea what. Not wanting to seem impolite, they smiled, blankly. Petal winked at Teacup.

Missus Provender continued “I've kinda noticed that, well, you sorta eat like an Earth Pony. In fact, you pretty much do everything like an Earth Pony. I ain't seen you use your horn once since you came to the house. I don't get it, Petal. You being a unicorn an' all.” Missus Provender looked uncomfortable “I don't mean anything by it or nothin', it's just, well, I ain't seen a unicorn act like that before. You ain't makin' fun of us or nothin' is ya?”

Petal looked momentarily horrified “No. NO! Sweet Celestia, Cornflower - Missus Provender - not in the least!” The aquamarine pony looked down, clearly troubled “I... I don't really like using my horn very often, Missus Provender. I actually like using my muzzle and hooves to do things. I, well, to tell you the truth, I didn't actually want to be a unicorn.”

Missus Provender was taken aback by this. After a moments consideration, she spoke “I fergot, there, for a bit, that you weren't exactly born a pony. But what's so bad about bein' a unicorn, if you don't mind me asking? I always figured that unicorns pretty much have it easy, what with all the magic and suchlike.”

“Well,” Petal began “I kind of feel like using magic for everything puts everyone and everything at a distance. I don't feel a part of the world, or a part of what I am doing when I just float something to me, or magic something to get it done. I've always felt” Petal shifted her weight on her neatly covered, hay-bale seat “that unicorns were kind of... loners. That they seemed like they were a little above other ponies, and that they fussed too much about all the details. That isn't the kind of pony I wanted to be, Missus Provender.”

Missus Provender seemed very interested in these words, and not a little satisfied, somehow. “I kind've felt the same way, myself there, Petal. But I never thought I'd hear a unicorn say such a thing! I guess I've heard everythin' now!”

Teacup wasn't sure what to make of the expression on Missus Provender's face, but it was clear that she found Petal's statements pleasing in some way. She also noted, with some humor, that 'Cornflower' clearly enjoyed formal address a great deal more than she let on – for her part, Teacup couldn't imagine calling Missus Provender anything other than... Missus Provender.

“I reckon you newfoals don't get to choose what kind of pony you become?”

“No, we don't, Missus Provender. It's decided by our genetics before our transformations, and we don't get any say in the matter. Much say, anyway.” Petal dipped her head so that a fall of soft pink mane drifted across her vision. Studying that, she flashed a strange, secretive smile.

“What kind 'o pony did ya want to be?” asked Missus Provender.

“I wanted to be anything but a unicorn, really. Pegasus, Earth Pony, I honestly didn't care. Just as long as it wasn't a unicorn.” Petal suddenly looked up “In a way, I was already too much of a... a unicorn... back before my Conversion. I didn't like who I was, or how I acted very much. I wanted to be a pony that could run and do things and laugh and not spend all the time fussing about little details.”

“You don't seem like that at all! Why I was told you are quite the little party-pony over in Clydesdale. Though, you are bein' a might serious right now.” Missus Provender gave Petal a kindly wink.

“I'm sorry, Missus Provender! It's all in the past now, really. Please just accept that I like to do things like other ponies do - ponies that aren't unicorns – well, as much as I can, anyway. I use my magic when it's necessary or useful, I assure you. I just don't like to use it all the time. That's all.” Petal looked down for a moment, then back up “I guess I'm a bit of an oddpony, for a unicorn. Sorry.” She then made a silly face, crossing her eyes and lolling her tongue out the side of her mouth, which brought a laugh from everypony.

Later, after some rather excellent apple pie (a specialty with Missus Provender, Durum loved his apples), and after all the guests had either headed home, or had clustered about the spread chatting in little groups, it was cleanup time. Petal helped with the cleanup, carrying dishes in her teeth. She even insisted on helping Teacup with the washing, again, always with her mouth. Teacup couldn't help but think that it would have been faster, and more fun, to use magic at that point, but Petal actually seemed to enjoy the work.

When the dishes had been set on the rack to dry, Teacup excused herself to use the outhouse. When she returned, she found Petal sitting folded, outside, looking up at the night sky. Teacup sidled over and asked “Mind if I join you?”

“No, please do. I was... kind of hoping you might.”

Teacup folded her legs under her body, the cool grass soft under her belly. She lowered her muzzle to sniff in the soft fragrance of grass and flower and the rich, deep tones of the soil. There was something about the smells of the night that touched something deep within her, and while she had no idea what it might be, it somehow felt like a lost, happy dream.

Teacup looked up to find Petal studying her. “Uh... sorry. I kind of lost track there for a moment.” She felt a little silly, being caught sniffing the ground and... apparently grinning. Oops.

Petal giggled, a sound as musical as it was warm “I wish I could feel half as happy as you seemed right then. Remembering something nice?”

“No, not exactly.” Teacup raised her head even with Petal's “Just something about the smells at night. They... somehow give me a happy feeling. Like something from a nice childhood I never had, kinda. Pretty silly, huh?”

“No, not silly at all. I understand the feeling of missing a childhood that was nice. I guess that's part of the reason I'm here. I've been down a lot lately.”

“Provender told me something like that. She said you were coming to spend a few days on the farm because it might cheer you up. That... and... well, that you might want to talk to another newfoal, too.”

“Did she ask you to talk with me?” Petal looked at the moon as she said this, and her voice sounded almost sad.

“Well, yes, she did. But... I kind of wanted to talk to you anyway. Since all the newfoals have moved out across the New Expanse, there just isn't anyone that... well, to talk to about...”

Petal suddenly looked straight at Teacup, serious and almost... frightened “Having once lived in the Human world?” She said the words softly, in the tone of a shared, unpleasant secret.

“Yes.” That one word carried so much sorrow and pain. Teacup felt her eyes water just a bit with the emotion of it.

“These native ponies can't know what it was like. They can't even begin to imagine such things. I've tried to talk to some of my friends in Clydesdale about my life before, and it's just impossible. They try, oh how they try, but... they just can't help.” Petal's head sank a little “They understand I'm not happy somehow, but they've never been touched by what we've been through. They don't carry a history like that around with them – and I'm glad they never will. I'm very glad they never can understand. I don't want them to.”

“It's really hard. Missus Provender is so nice to me, she's been like the mother I never really had. She's wonderful, and I'm very grateful to her... but” Teacup felt excited, to finally have someone who could understand “there's just no way I can talk about 'Earth'” Teacup practically spat the name of their mutual, lost world “not in any way that matters. How can I even mention that stuff?”

“I guess you're carrying one too.” Petal lay her head down over her hooves, her muzzle tickled by the grass.

“Carrying what?”

“A big heavy set of saddlebags filled with crap. A childhood in a scary, dangerous, poisoned world. Mean people doing cruel things. Parents who didn't know the first thing about parenting. Feeling lonely and alienated, all the time. Needing to run away into books and videos and music and anything else that offered some escape. Angst, despair, knowing that one day you would grow up to be one of them – all grey and hollow and dead inside, consumed by money and stuff. A lifetime of gray cities and gray skies and gray people doing gray things, all while the world died and billions suffered and children in some foreign land worked as slaves to make your shoes and your threevee and your clothes."

Petal raised her head and looked out over the farm, a slight quaver in her voice "The burden of knowing what a world of true, real evil means. Of having spent a big part of your life in an evil world. I wish...” Petal looked very much like she might cry “I wish... that I could just forget it all. I wish I could erase my memories, all of them. I wish I could just be Petal Confetti all the time, and never have moments of remembering having been.... who I was, before. That there even was a before.”

Petal suddenly looked at Teacup with a hard expression, her face close, her breath hot “Sometimes I feel angry. I envy these ponies their innocent pasts. I envy them. So. Very. Much.” Petal held the glare for just a moment, before realizing, and turning slowly away. She sank her head back to the grass, over her hooves.

It was so true. Every word Petal had said burned within Teacup, little smoldering coals, deep in her heart. “We can never truly be happy, can we?” she asked, finally “We are living in a kind of paradise, and we can never really be happy. Not like them.” She looked over Petal, past the lawn, to the farmhouse, where missus and mister Provender were, probably already in bed, having beautiful, happy dreams. As always. Did native ponies even have nightmares? They must, she thought, at least sometimes. They have an Equestrian word for 'nightmare', so they must.

“Now you know my problem. Not the best one to have, for a Party Pony from Clydesdale.”

“Party Pony?” asked Teacup.

“Well, my real job is being a Delivery Pony. It's not overly challenging, which actually, I kind of like, and I get to run all over the place, which I especially like. Sometimes I pull a cart, but mostly it's just me and my saddlebags. I'm the first, and maybe only unicorn to do such work. I'm kind of proud of that fact.” Petal did seem pleased.

“But my social function is that I am the pony to go to for celebrations, parties, that sort of thing. I do weddings and birthdays, too. I'm basically the go-to pony if there's any kind of to-do!” Petal giggled at this, and Teacup couldn't help but join in. Tension just couldn't seem to survive Petal's laughter.

“Even so, I can never seem to just... let go and be spontaneous the way I want to be.” Petal frowned, slightly “It's that weight. My past. It sits on my back and I can't buck it off no matter what I do.”

“Me either.” Teacup looked up at the moon, so smooth and bright, a perfect pearl set in a velvet sky of precious diamonds. “Hey! You're a unicorn!” She looked expectantly at Petal.

“Um, I don't follow you.”

"First, I understand you don't like using your magic. But just hear me out, alright?" The moonlight was bright in Teacup's eyes "The thing that hurts us all the time, the thing that sets us apart from everyone we care about, that makes us different is the fact we lived as humans, once!"

"Well, yes, fundamentally that is the issue here, I just don't..."

"Back on Earth, having a problem meant you just suffer with it, or find some drug that dulls it, or turn bitter because of it. I suppose the very rich could afford neurological treatments, or even engram rewriting, or whatever. But for people like us, ordinary people, it's either suffer or dull the pain, or hope it just somehow goes away, only it never really does, does it? It certainly hasn't for us, and it's been ten years since the end of the Earth!"

"So what is your idea, Teacup?"

"Like I said, you are a unicorn. You have magic. This is a magical world! Anything might be possible - Equestria had magic enough to swallow a planet and change billions of humans into ponies, right? We have real, living goddesses, for real, really here. They raise the freaking moon and sun!" Teacup was having a hard time keeping her voice low "You can do magic, right? So find a spell, find some magic that can erase memory! Or a potion, or a charm, or whatever it is that magical ponies do! If we have no memory of Earth, then we'll just be Equestrians, like everypony else!"

Petal was taken aback "Teacup... wait, wait... I understand what you are trying to say, but there's a little problem with this - if our memories are gone, we'll just be empty shells, lobotomized zombie ponies, drooling and making messes all over the..."

"No! No we won't!" Teacup was irrepressible now, "I said our memories of EARTH. Only Earth, we both have a full decade of decent Equestrian life under our saddles now, ten full years of life apiece, and all of that is what makes us who we truly are, who we want to be all the time! Don't you see? If we lose our Earth years, we completely become the face we present to everypony, only without all the pain underneath! The only thing anypony else would notice would be that we stopped being so damn gloomy!"

Petal didn't know what to say. Teacup's plan seemed wild, insane, yet, the more she thought about it, the more she couldn't find a valid objection. Ten years as an adult Equestrian would simply carry on. Their Equestrian lives would continue, only they simply wouldn't remember anything from before their Conversion. A simple letter to themselves could explain what had happened to their memories, and why - in a very general, non-traumatizing way of course - so that they wouldn't become obsessed with trying to recover them. It could work.

It was even... elegant.

In the end, if it could be done correctly, they would become ordinary ponies, and the only thing that would set them apart would be knowing that they had once had sad memories that they had deliberately chosen to eliminate, because it hurt too much to keep them.

They could have a normal pony life. They could be completely open to other ponies, because they would no longer have any toxic ideas or toxic memories that might poison their experience of Equestria from within.

Why on Equestria hadn't this already been done for all newfoals? Why hadn't this been made a part of the Conversion process? It seemed a terrible oversight. It should have just been part of it all from the beginning. The thought that they could have been spared ten years of feeling different and unable to talk openly, that they had been cheated out of ten truly, fully, completely happy years made both Petal and Teacup a little angry.

But nevermind. This could be fixed. With a little magic.

And Petal, well, she was a unicorn, after all.

Teacup hadn't felt this light and glad since the night that Missus Provender had made hot oat smoothies and opened up to her about her past. And moments like that, yet to come, would never be spoiled by the smothering grief of remembering the horror of the human world. This was like a gift from the Princesses themselves.

From the farmhouse porch, Missus Provender had been watching her little Teacup grow increasingly excited, talking about something or another with that Petal mare. Teacup seemed happier than Cornflower had ever seen her.

Yup, thought Missus Provender, all it took was finding Teacup somepony to talk to. Everything was surely going to be alright now.

5. Road To Nowhen

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Lost In The Herd: Four

Teacup
Down On The
Farm

By Chatoyance

Chapter Five: Road To Nowhen

Leaving Provender Farm was the most difficult thing Teacup had ever had to deal with since becoming an Equestrian. The farm was more than just her work, it was her home, her family. Mister and Missus Provender were like loving parents in her mind, and Teacup cried and cried as she ambled away with Petal.

Missus Provender had both hoped for, and dreaded, this day. She had expected it to come, from the first time she had seen the quivering, half-aware mare unloaded from the Bureau cart, and carried into her kitchen. They always leave, she sighed, because that's how it must be. Still, this was another daughter leaving the farm.

Cornflower Provender shuffled her hooves, and flicked her tail nervously back and forth as she watched Teacup and Petal slowly disappear down the road to South Withers. Teacup had said she was coming back, that this was just a trip to find a cure for her sadness. That she wanted to return, and would as soon as she could. With luck, it would not even be that long a time.

But Cornflower had already raised three fillies in her life, and once they leave the farm, really leave the farm, they don't come back, save for the occasional, rare, visit.

Mister Provender nuzzled his wife. "Ya did a mighty fine job with that one, Cornflower. Mighty fine." Missus Provender turned and buried her muzzle in his graying mane. She wasn't about to let the old stallion see her weep.

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

Petal and Teacup stopped briefly in South Withers, once they had reached the town, to stock up on supplies for their journey. They had reasoned that the erasure of memories would almost certainly be a fairly exotic magic, and one not likely to be found in a rural setting. In all of their ten years in Equestria, neither had ever heard of such a thing, and they had seen and heard of many different forms of magic. Magic was commonplace in Equestria - every unicorn naturally expressed it - more than this there were magical plants, magical creatures and magical artifacts either within its borders, or outside them. If in a decade they had never heard of memory magic, then surely it was unusual at least, if not actually hidden away somewhere.

If, of course, such magic even existed. But, Teacup's argument that engulfing an entire planet was magnitudes greater than merely erasing a few memories carried weight. It was unlikely that if power such as that existed, that erasing memories would somehow be too hard to do.

The two ponies had decided to head first to Hoofington, which was known to have both large bookstores, and a significant library. If they could find nothing there, they could continue on to Manehattan, by way of Ponyville if need be. There was also the possibility of going the other direction, and traveling directly from Ponyville to nearby Canterlot. That destination both intrigued and frightened them.

On one hoof, if any magic such as they desired existed, Canterlot would almost certainly have it. Canterlot was the capital of Equestria, and the home of the twin princess-goddesses that ruled over the realm. Anything even vaguely important would surely be found there.

But, on the other hoof, the fact that memory erasure had not been made a part of Conversion, nor ever offered to any newfoal, sat heavily with both Petal and Teacup. It was such an obvious boon, yet it was never mentioned even as a possibility. This suggested strongly to them that such magic might even be forbidden in some way.

Neither Petal, nor Teacup wanted to do anything against the wishes of their sovereigns, nor the laws of Equestria, but their pain was great, and in the end, the only ponies that could possibly be hurt if something went wrong were they, themselves. It seemed cruel to them, if memory magic was somehow forbidden, to deny it when it could do such obvious good. They had both known what it was to live in a world where it was common to be denied basic necessities for arbitrary, even downright mean reasons. Thus they both knew what it was to find ways around rules, merely to survive. This was no different in their minds.

Thus trotting into the very heart of rule in the land and poking about for what very well might be a forbidden magic did not appeal to them as a wise thing to do. Perhaps, along the way, they could find out whether or not such magic was allowed without raising suspicion. Then they could decide which direction to ultimately take, Manehattan, or the other way, to Canterlot.

They had briefly considered daring to ask the princesses directly for help. But that, that was just crazy. Asking a living goddess to help them with their personal problems seemed frighteningly selfish and ridiculous. Worse if they were denied, or told that such magic was disallowed, then that would be the end of all their hope, forever.

South Withers was a moderately sized community, much larger than the town of Clydesdale that Petal knew. The old fairgrounds were unused now, but the many shops and stores that had grown up around the fair, before it had been moved, still thrived. South Withers had become a hub of commerce for all the farming villages nearby, and a distribution point for the things they grew.

Teacup led Petal through the town. She knew it well, having come here many times with Mister Provender over the years. She took Petal to the Toffee Tower, her favorite candy store. It wasn't really much of a tower, though it had been constructed to vaguely look like one. It would be nice to have some sweet treats on the trip.

The Toffee twins were there, as usual, Almond and Cashew. Almond was up front, at the counter, Cashew pushing a cart filled with sweets out from the back. "Teacup! How nice! Are you here with Mister Provender doing shopping today?"

Almond noticed the pony with Teacup "Oh, Hello, I remember you from the party! You're the unicorn Missus Provender sent for aren't you? The one that made the funny face!"

"Yes, that's me, I'm Petal. Howdy do!" Petal did her funny face again at Almond, which made both twins laugh.

"We're here to pick up some sweets to take with us. We're going on a journey together." Teacup sniffed at a display filled with candied flowers.

"Oooh! Where are you going?" Cashew wanted to know.

"Um... we are kind of heading to Manehattan, I think." Teacup went and collected a small basket with a handle, and began choosing sweets to put into it "We figure they might have some good bookstores there. And a big library."

"You're after books? We do have a bookstore in Withers, you know that, right?" Almond was proud of his town.

"We're after some special books." Petal had found some gummy apple drops and signaled to Teacup that she wanted some added to the basket. "Books about the mysteries of magic, thaumaturgical studies, that sort of thing."

"Hmmm... you know..." said Cashew thoughtfully "You might try the library in Ponyville. It's a small town, but it's right next to Canterlot, and Celestia herself sponsors the librarian there, or so they say. You have to go through there to get to Manehattan. Bet you could find some rare books there!"

Teacup and Petal exchanged glances. If Celestia herself was involved with the town, maybe they should avoid it. They still didn't know if what they were trying to learn was even allowed. "We'll certainly give that a try, thanks a lot!" Petal said, as cheerfully as possible.

"You still might check out Coriander's Books" Almond grumbled. "You just might be surprised."

"Well, then," Petal gave a wink to Teacup "We'll definitely have to give them a try before we leave town!" This caused Almond to brighten considerably.

Leaving the candy shop, Teacup's saddlebags bulged with the addition of not a few treats. Teacup was proud to carry the saddlebags on her back. They were a traveling gift from Missus Provender, and bore the mark of Provender Farms: a cornucopia filled with hay. As they ambled down the street, Teacup caught Petal watching her admiring the bags.

"Saddlebags are just the best, aren't they?" Petal smiled "I adore mine. I can carry so much in them, and they feel like old friends, now,"

"Missus Provender gave these to me, before I left. They used to be hers." Teacup was silent for a long while "I miss her. I miss the farm."

"We could turn back, Teacup. We don't have to do this."

"And then what? Nothing would change. We'd still feel different and alone. I, at least, would probably grow bitter as the years went on. I don't want that. No. We go on." Teacup was resolute.

"Ok, ok! Just checking. Hey, should we check the local bookstore, just in case?"

"Um... maybe." Teacup looked thoughtful for a moment "I have an idea. Coriander is a unicorn as I recall. There aren't many in these parts, you've probably noticed, being a farming community. But... we might try asking about the magic we're looking for. We might at least get some idea about how magic like that is viewed. I don't think we'll find any useful books, but we might at least learn something."

"Hmmm... I guess it wouldn't do any harm." Petal agreed "Let's go see this Super Impressive Coriander the Amazing Bookstore Unicorn then!" Petal giggled at her overly grandiose pronouncement, and Teacup just had to laugh too.

Coriander was indeed a unicorn, and he sat at the back of his astonishingly packed bookstore. It really was filled with books. On shelves. In piles behind the door. In piles on top of other piles. It was a bit of a struggle just to navigate all the way to the back without knocking over something. Teacup stepped carefully, bending this way and that so her saddlebags wouldn't topple one of the tall, barely balanced stacks.

The unicorn was old, very old, and his mane had turned the color of snow, along with much of his once blue coat. He was busy reading a large, heavy book, the glow from his horn intermittently turning pages. Coriander's gruff voice was loud in the small store "Ah, customers? I haven't had customers in a long while. You are customers, right? You're not here for directions, or to sell me something are you?"

"No. Yes! I mean, we are most definitely customers. Potential customers, to be precise. We would like to be customers, provided that you have what we are looking for, which by no means are we absolutely sure of." Petal seemed oddly flustered. Perhaps Coriander had startled her, somehow.

"Well, well! This is quite the positive development then!" Coriander turned from his book to face them, still sitting on a small, padded hoofstool. "Usually I get salesponies, or the occasional colt using my shop for hide-and-seek. I am indeed honored to have real customers! How can I help you grand mares today?" The ancient stallion grinned widely at them, his teeth yellowed but intact.

"My friend here, she's called Petal, by the way, - and I'm Teacup, howdy do - is interested in learning magic. I mean, she already is magic, she's a unicorn, she does magic of course, but..." Teacup had been surprised by Coriander, and was still unsure of how to put things "... what I mean is that she wants to learn more magic, being a unicorn and all, and well... um.. you wouldn't happen to have any books on that would you? Um, magic, I mean."

Coriander looked at Teacup for a while, as though he was sorting her out in his mind "Not really much call for magic in these parts, to tell you the truth. Now farming, I have books on that. When to plant, what to plant, what not to plant and where you shouldn't plant what you shouldn't be planting when you shouldn't be planting at all. I've got stacks of books up to here - " Coriander nodded at a particularly tall pile of books "all about farming. Mostly because what we have in this region is, unsurprisingly, farmers."

Teacup just stared, Petal however giggled happily at this strange outburst.

"In retrospect, filling my shop with books about farming may have been a mistake. Being that everyone for miles around is a farmer, and the descendant of farmers that have been farming for as far back as anyone can remember..." Coriander nodded at a huge, multiple, entwined, triple stack of books that ran all the way to the ceiling "... it should have been obvious that the last thing any of them would actually need to read would be a book about what they were already expert in." The aged unicorn sighed loudly "A bit foolish on my part, really."

"How do you stay in business, then?" Teacup felt very sorry for the poor old unicorn.

"Mostly, I farm." Petal laughed out loud at that. Coriander gave her a wink "I run an orchard just outside of Withers. I'm too old for labor anymore, so I sit here, and have hired hooves buck my peaches for me. I wouldn't have known how to do any of that except..."

"Except for all the books here!" Petal finished the bookseller's words for him.

"Yup." With that, Coriander smiled the biggest smile yet.

Coriander actually did have a small selection of books about magic, and in retrieving them for the mares to see, Teacup saw how it was that the massive stacks had been made. Watching the ancient stallion use his glowing horn to lift entire piles of books, hold them steady in mid-air, separate them, pluck individual tomes from out of the resultant cloud, then reshuffle and restack the books neatly was thrilling for her. Teacup began to wish her new friend enjoyed magic more, because it was wonderful to see. In all of her ten years on the farm, she had seen pegasai, of course - weather being quite important to the business of farming - but not many unicorns at all. She'd certainly never seen magic used on this scale.

When the show of shifting books was over, Teacup was a little disappointed. Books flying around like birds was really quite entertaining.

"Hmmm..." Petal was checking out Coriander's small selection of books on the topic of magic "'My First Book Of Basic Spells', 'How To Care For Your Horn', 'Horn Health And You', Ah!..." Her own horn glowed as she hovered a very old, small red book in front of her "'Appropriate Thaumaturgy: A Practical Guide To The Proper Use Of Magic', second edition... hmmm... University Of Canterlot. How much for this one, Mr. Coriander?"

"Let's see..." Coriander floated the book away from Petal's glowing grasp, and turned it, hovering in the air, so that he could see the inside back cover "I always write a little note inside so that I can..." The bookseller squinted for a while "Um, Teacup, was it? Can you see how much this is?" The book now floated in front of Teacup's eyes.

Teacup suddenly looked shocked. Her eyes went wide, and her pupils narrowed. "Um.... I... no... I can't..." She turned her head away, and looked down at her own flank, her ears drooping. "I can't... tell."

Petal stared at Teacup for a moment, then jumped in "How about I make you an offer, Mr. Coriander? You see, we're going on a long trip, so I can't give you a lot, but.." she brushed in front of Teacup, filling Mr. Coriander's attention entirely "...maybe you'd consider, oh, say..." Teacup realized that she was no longer on the spot, and looked up. She quietly backed up through the piles of books until she was at the front door again. Then she softly opened the door, and went outside.

Teacup sat down on the wooden sidewalk in front of the bookstore. She hung her head, and waited.

After some time, Petal stepped outside and closed the door behind her. In her mouth was the little red book. She looked at Teacup, then carefully put the book into her own saddlebags. She sat down next to Teacup.

They sat there for a little while, in silence. "The Equestrian written language is kind of difficult." Petal gave Teacup a little nudge "And there sure isn't a lot of call for it on a working farm."

"I know a few words, from experience." Teacup was studying the sidewalk intently "Flour, Apples, and I can spell 'Provender Farm' too. I memorized that from the sign at the front. There was just so much to do, and... needing to read things never really came up, it just... didn't."

"It's OK, Teacup. This isn't Earth, remember? You were taught what you needed to know for the life you were leading." Petal pondered for a moment "You know, maybe Missus Provender doesn't know how to read either. I'm sure she would have taught you, if she could have. She really cares for you, you know."

"I know she does. It's just that, before...here... only the worst... most hopeless... reading was the only way to hope to get the degrees necessary to even have a job and..." Teacup faltered.

"Like I said, this isn't Earth. Here, farming is valued. It's vital. Knowing how to grow things is important here... and whatever it was you knew as a human really doesn't matter anymore. Well, probably doesn't. What did you do?"

"Nanofabrication science. I was a Nanofabricator for Eastcorp. Programming and... hopper maintenance." Teacup played with her front hooves, making little clopping sounds on the sidewalk "I studied for four years, all while living on the street to get that job. I pulled myself out of the favela. Just for a little respect, just for... I studied so hard..."

"Teacup, you are a fine mare, and you are not a human. You are a pony, a farm pony, and I am proud to be friends with such a highly respected farmer from such an amazing place as Provender Farms!"

Teacup looked up, finally, and found Petal's eyes utterly serious, and utterly without guile. She meant every word, and it shone from her like sunshine.

"We're really friends?"

Petal giggled loudly, and the whole world brightened. She nuzzled Teacup "Of course, you silly goose. I liked you from the moment I met you. Now, let's get going!"

"I'm a pony, not a goose." Teacup had raised her head, and her ears had lifted up high again.

"But if you were a goose, I just know you'd be good at that, too."

In that moment, Teacup suddenly decided that she very much liked having Petal Confetti for a traveling companion.

6. Tears Of Rain

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Lost In The Herd: Four

Teacup
Down On The
Farm

By Chatoyance

Chapter Six: Tears Of Rain

Teacup's saddlebags weighed heavy on her back as she and Petal Confetti trotted down the endless dirt road. The deep wagon and cart ruts they had been following were gone, running off and away to the east, towards far Fillydelphia. The two had considered going to Fillydelphia, for there surely must be many bookstores in such a large city, but had reasoned that more possibilities existed if they kept to their original plan, Manehattan by way of Ponyville. Fillydelphia was relatively isolated, and there were several possibilities to find what they were seeking, one after another, on the road to Manehattan.

Petal seemed to be enjoying the trip, and often hummed or sang little songs. Teacup enjoyed these musical moments, because she didn't know any songs, and in any case she definitely couldn't sing. While she had never actually tried to sing anything in her new pony body, she had always assumed that her lack of ability in the human world would naturally carry over, so she had never bothered to even try. A part of her wished she could join in with Petal, but it was enough to be cheered by Petal's lovely voice.

Occasionally, Petal would become distracted by something as they traveled, slowing progress a bit. There always seemed to be a new, tastier flower just around a bend, or a party-colored swarm of butterflies to admire, or, even a shining lake or pond that reflected the vast, blue sky. Equestria was truly beautiful, and Teacup had come to think of her land as ever more like a storybook than she had previously considered.

Petal had been hanging back for awhile, darting from flower to flower, sniffing them and commenting on which ones were spicy or which were sweet. She had been on Teacup's right, now she was on her left, trotting up beside her. She seemed to be studying Teacup's saddlebags as she passed her flank and came up even with her.

"Most interesting. Teacup, I just noticed that you don't have a cutie mark. I've never seen that in a fully grown pony before. I didn't know it was possible, actually. I don't want to make you feel uncomfortable or anything, but I can't help being curious about this. If you don't mind me asking, how?, why?, what?... I'm kind of intrigued here."

"There's not much to tell, Petal. It just never happened for me. I love my work on the farm, I love the farm, I thought I was pretty good at it - the Provender's seemed to think so too - it's just that no Mark ever showed up for me. Missus Provender always figured that it was just because I was a newfoal, and that I shouldn't worry about it. But, after meeting you..." Teacup trailed off, a little unsure of what to say next.

"I see: I'm a newfoal, just like you, but I have a cutie mark. I guess you haven't had much contact with other newfoals until I arrived? I understand. It is all very strange and mysterious, these things -" Petal nodded her head at her own Mark, just barely visible underneath the edge of her own saddlebags "how they just appear, and why, and how they somehow 'know' to represent something about a pony's life. It's like magic has a mind of it's own that can make decisions about such things... or maybe somehow we ourselves magic the Marks into whatever they become." Petal shook her pink mane "I ain't got a clue!" she said the words with a lilt in her voice, and smiled.

"How... How did you get your Mark, Petal?" Teacup asked, a little hesitantly.

"Well," began Petal "My situation was a little odd. I was with friends, and we were running from the HLF, you know, that old 'Human Liberation' thing that thought they could fight Equestria? We were flying over the ocean, trying to get to the Barrier, being shot at the whole way by a helicopter. It was kind of scary."

"Oh...my! I had no idea, Petal! Wow, I'm really sorry - that must have been really scary!"

"It was ten years ago, and...obviously I survived! Anyway, we made the barrier, but the copter couldn't stop, so it plowed right through. It broke up because..." Petal looked uncomfortable for a moment "...there was something in it that couldn't get past the barrier, and that tore the machine apart." It took a few moments for Teacup to grasp the implication, and then, briefly, her eyes widened, and it was clear she was disturbed by the thought.

"Anyway," Petal gave Teacup a little nudge "as the copter parts fell, the magic of Equestria took over, and they changed. They just... changed. Into flower petals. They fell down like a colorful rain. It was just beautiful. I had been so frightened, so terrified, I was sure I wasn't going to make it, and suddenly, I was safe, I was in Equestria, and the thing that had been trying to kill me had become colorful confetti in the air! I was soooo relieved. I just started laughing. I laughed all the way to the ground. The relief... I can't even describe how much I felt, it was overwhelming."

"I imagine it was! What a scary thing! I'd be hysterical by that point, I think."

"I kind of was, actually. They had to calm me down. When I finally got around to being able to help my friends again, I noticed I had gotten this -" Petal tried to shift her walk so that her cutie mark, a pink streamer surrounded by confetti, could be seen, but all that happened was that her haunches swayed dangerously, and she almost tripped "- I guess the relief made me so happy, that it kind of changed me. I used to be so serious all of the time. Not just some of the time, like now, but, I mean, every moment."

"I kind of decided to become a party pony at that point" Petal smiled "I just wanted to keep feeling as happy as I could after all of that, and to let others feel happy too. Also, I kind of wanted to honor someone who had helped me, once. When I was settled in Clydesdale, I threw my first party, and I chose my name. Petal Confetti, because that is what that copter looked like, after it had changed. Like flower petals falling like confetti. My salvation, thanks to the magic of Equestria."

"Wow. I mean, just... wow." Teacup was speechless. She had experienced many narrow escapes in her human life, and a few failures to escape as well, but never anything properly adventurous like what Petal described. For Teacup, even a successful escape had meant returning to the usual nightmare, and never a true happy ending.

Well... except for her last minute escape from Earth itself, she thought. That turned out alright. Better than alright. Suddenly Teacup missed the farm and Missus Provender again.

"I know that look." Petal leaned in "Tush, tush, you'll see Missus Provender again. And the farm. And Mister Provender. You'll be back there in no time."

"How... how did you know? That I was thinking that, I mean?"

"When your ears droop suddenly, it's a pretty good guess as to what you're feeling, Teacup." Petal looked into the distance ahead "If I had a Missus Provender and a Farm, I'd probably feel the same way."

"Don't you have a home in Clydesdale?" Teacup asked.

"I have a room, and I have ponies I know, and I am sure they like me. But I don't have a home. Not exactly." Petal fell silent after that, so Teacup let things be. The two continued down the road, impossibly steep mountains on the right, and an increasing number of trees on the left.

They walked on that way for a long time.

It was late afternoon, before they spoke again. They had fallen into a kind of silent trudge that anyone on a long journey eventually settles into, where the act of walking becomes almost hypnotic. But something had changed.

Teacup stopped. She sniffed the air. She sniffed it again. "Petal?"

Petal stopped and turned around "Teacup? What is it?"

"Rain. It's going to rain." With that Teacup looked up from the dusty road, and Petal joined her, to look at the sky.

Above the two walking ponies, flying pegasai could be seen soaring back and forth, stacking fluffy clouds as though they were building a pillow fort in the sky. A number of the winged ponies could be seen working together to push and prod a gigantic, dark raincloud into position, tucking it into the smaller, fluffy clouds, gradually blotting out the blue.

"Hey! Hello!" Teacup called up to them, but either they were too high up to hear, or too intent on what they were doing to answer. She turned to Petal "See the big, dark clouds they are bringing in? They do that when they are behind schedule. This is going to be a big one, maybe even a storm. I'll bet that they forgot a regularly scheduled rain in these parts, and they're having to make up for it. Happens a lot more than they like to admit, you know."

"Wow, you sure know a lot about the weather!" Petal seemed impressed.

"Comes with living on a farm. 'Course there, we negotiated directly with the pegasai for the weather we needed. Every month a pegasus representative visited the farms, and worked out the schedule. We had a few commotions over it all, too -sometimes one group of farms wanted more rain, and others didn't and that sort of thing. Of course, if you paid extra, you could get personal attention, rain on just your farm or whatever. But nobody much wanted to pay extra, so..."

"Hee! Sounds almost like Earth there. So how bad did the arguments get?"

"Not terribly bad or anything. Things were pretty much resolved with various deals involving pies and offers of help and such. We called it 'weather barter'. Four pies could get Old Farmer Roan to agree to less rain so the wheat wouldn't get soaked, that sort of thing. It was more like fun than actual trouble. Though there was that one time with the Epona brothers...I thought Missus Provender was going to buck one of them right in the flank." Teacup smiled at the memory.

"So, what do you think we should do about this situation? I don't think we can get their attention," Petal nodded up towards the Pegasai far above "and even if we could, I'm not sure we have anything to offer them to hold off on the rain."

"We need to find some shelter. This is going to be a doozy, I think. They're really bringing in the big clouds. I've never seen such big ones before. Maybe it's because we're between towns, so they figure they can let loose and make up for lost rain." Teacup scanned their surroundings "I'm not sure where to go. We're kind of in the middle of nowhere."

It was true. The dirt road stretched on behind and in front of them, to their right were tall peaks, and to their left dense forest. The forest did not look pleasant, for it was an extension of the Everfree, and the world just didn't work correctly in there.

Petal and Teacup tried shouting again, in unison, attempting to signal the remaining pegasai above. The fliers had almost finished packing the sky with dark, ominous clouds, and almost no trace of blue was left in the sky, except over the forest. There was no point in trying to manage the weather of the Everfree, so the pegasai just didn't bother.

"How bad could a storm like this get, Teacup?" Petal sounded a little concerned.

"I've heard stories over the years. The pegasai like throwing big storms, they even have a competition, or so I've been told. Pretty bad, I expect."

"Alright..." Petal nervously shuffled her hooves on the road "There's no storm over the Everfree. Maybe if we are very careful, and stay really aware, we can take shelter in the forest just until the storm is over. What if we go in, only a little ways, and just be really, really unobtrusive. We don't touch anything, we don't eat anything except from our bags, and we generally do not interact with the forest at all. What do you think?"

Teacup agreed. "I can't think of a better solution at the moment, so, let's do that."

The two mares gingerly approached the edge of the nearby spur of Everfree, and tried to find a way in that did not involve plowing through unknown underbrush or some strange plant.

Just as the first drops of rain wet their flanks, Teacup and Petal managed to find a small path into the eerie forest. The instant Teacup stepped across the threshold between Equestria and the border of the Everfree, the feeling of the air changed. The already dim light seemed darker, and the smells of the world changed instantly. One moment the pleasant air of Equestria, the next her nose was filled with a steamy jungle of strange scents and curious odors.

It was a different world inside the Everfree, and it did not feel like home. Carefully, the ponies picked their way into the forest, careful to avoid anything that looked even vaguely odd. They had heard many stories over the years about the Everfree, and pretty much none of them were happy stories. In time, they felt themselves beyond the possibility of lightning or being soaked, and what they could see of the sky through the canopy of leaves was blue. But they still heard the loud rumble of thunder, and occasionally a particularly bright flash of lightning from beyond the forest would illuminate the trunks of the trees. It was a strange experience: warm, blue sky forest around them, yet a raging storm only a few hundred feet away, just outside.

They had found a small clearing, where the forest floor was mostly empty of plants -at least strange plants- and the trees formed a sort of circle around them. They decided to lay down near the edge of the clearing where they had entered, and wait out the storm, while keeping an eye on everything around them. Strange beasts, monsters even, were said to live in the forest, and neither pony wanted to become dinner for some fantastic creature.

They stayed that way for some time, breathing quietly, ears scanning the forest for any sign of approach. Teacup and Petal glanced furtively about, looking for any movement through the trees. But nothing happened, and in time they began to relax. Maybe the Everfree forest was not quite as dangerous as it had been made out to be.

Petal decided that the time waiting could be put to good use, and she turned her neck and rooted about in her left saddlebag with her muzzle. She brought out the little red book she had bought at Coriander's, and set it in front of her. She studied the tome for a bit, silently mouthing the name on the cover 'Appropriate Thaumaturgy'. "Keep watch, Teacup, I'm going to check out this book, and see what I can learn about the rules of magic while we wait, OK?" Teacup agreed.

Petal sighed, then closed her eyes briefly. Her horn began to glow with a faint, soft light. Though Teacup was watching the forest carefully, her eyes couldn't help but drift to watch, for this was the first time she had ever seen Petal use her unicorn magic.

The little red book began to glow with the same soft light as Petal's horn. The book lifted off the untidy leaves littering the forest ground, and hovered inches above them. Then it suddenly rotated so that the spine faced the ground. Finally, the covers parted, like a bird opening its wings for flight.

Pages flipped making little whipping sounds until the frontispiece and title showed. The image illustrated by the frontispiece was of Princess Celestia smiling at the reader, surrounded by curled banners and decorative flourishes. The banners were covered in the pictographs that made up the Equestrian written language: horseshoe shapes, star shapes, horse-like marks, glyphs that resembled stylized lightning bolts, unicorn horns, crescents, spirals and other simple shapes. Teacup had grasped that Equestrian writing was more likely an ideographic script rather than a phonetic one, her earthly background in programming had let her see that much. But trying to learn such a written language at her age seemed daunting to her.

It had apparently not been too daunting for Petal, however, and though Petal was the younger pony, she was still well past the language window for humans. Then again, they were no longer human. This encouraged Teacup somewhat. Maybe learning to read an ideographic script might be easier for her, as an Equestrian, if she gave it a try.

Teacup suddenly remembered that she was supposed to be keeping watch while Petal examined the book. She whipped her head upright from where it had gradually crept closer to the little red tome. Teacup scanned the trees around them, looking for any movement, and swiveled her ears back and forth to catch any approaching sound.

"Hmmm... this book was once part of the university library. I wonder... how it ended up all the way out in South Withers?" mumbled Petal, as she flipped a page with her horn "Let's see, basic magical etiquette... advanced..."

Teacup froze. Her breathing stopped as her heart skipped a beat. The shape, dark and curious, moved against the dim light that shone from breaks in the forest canopy. The round silhouette almost bobbed, like a cork in water, only very slowly, like a balloon drifting on the breeze. It was huge, surely as big as the largest bull, and there seemed to be some kind of projections coming up from the top of it. There was no sound, but the air had changed, somehow, and in her bones Teacup felt an inexplicable, sudden dread.

"Petal. Petal. Shhh. Petal!" she squeaked, nudging her friend with her head. Petal looked up "Huh? What is it?"

"Shhhh!" Teacup spoke in a frightened whisper "Something..." she motioned with her nose "There!"

Petal's horn went out. The book dropped to the leaves, making a soft, quiet thump. Her eyes focused on the dim shape. After a moment she spoke, soft and low: "It...it can't be. It better not be. No. No-no-no-no..."

"What is it, Petal?" Teacup barely breathed.

"Stay very still, be very quiet. But if I say run, run as fast as you can, and don't look back. Understand? Just run."

"I won't leave you." Teacup was adamant.

"You will, and you won't argue. If anything happens, you just run, promise me." Petal had a look in her eyes that only a creature that had known the terrors of Earth could possess, the look of one who knows hopelessness.

Teacup said nothing. The two huddled close to the ground, wishing they were physically closer, just for the comfort, but not daring to move lest they make some noise. Their breathing was shallow, and Teacup felt her blood had turned to ice water.

In the distance, the storm raged on, beyond the boundaries of the forest. The sound of it, dulled by the thick trees, was a welcome cover, one that would hopefully help to hide any sounds from them. But the fact was that they were both in an open clearing, and as much as the sound of the storm might blot out their ragged breathing, they were not hidden from view.

The shape stopped, bobbing slowly in place. Teacup could now see that it was indeed round, like a ball, and she could not see any legs. Did it... float somehow? She briefly imagined some cute, whimsical balloon creature, friendly and party-colored like a pony. But this thing did not seem colorful, rather it was shadow and grey, and the way she felt inside, it was not easy to imagine that it was friendly. Indeed, it felt like her memories of life in the favela on earth, and she flashed briefly back to the night she lost her human ear.

A low, gutteral hissing came from the shape. It almost sounded like some kind of language, but if it was, it was the most awful speech Teacup had ever heard. The shadow approached the clearing, spotlights of sun from the canopy sliding over a scaled, spherical form. Teacup could see the thing now, at the far edge of the little clearing, and for a moment her breath stopped entirely.

It was perhaps eight feet in diameter, and hung in the air, low to the ground. A sphere covered in scales, with one vast, soulless eye filling the front. Below the great eye was a ragged gash of mouth, opening and closing as if tasting the air. Inside the mouth were rows upon rows of dagger-sharp teeth.

The spherical creature had no arms or legs, but above, on top, almost like a crown, it had ten thin stalks, each of which blossomed into a small eye. Each of the ten tiny eyes swiveled and moved upon their scaly stalks. Teacup had never seen anything like it, and had never imagined anything so terrible, even in her worst nightmares.

The many eyes of the strange beast gradually converged on one point, which to the horror of the two Equestrians was clearly them.

"Teacup." The word was flat, almost mechanical as Petal said it "Get ready to run." It was not a friendly suggestion, it was an absolute command.

The spherical abomination slowly floated towards the two ponies.

"Thank you for having been my friend. Now... RUN!!!" Petal Confetti suddenly sprang up, more like a jungle cat than a pony, and ran straight at the monstrous horror. "RUUUNNNN!!!" she shouted as her battle cry. And to her shame, Teacup could not help but follow Petal's command, her terrified legs acting of their own volition, utterly ignoring what she wanted to do. Her body disobeyed her will and she found herself crashing through the brush and undergrowth, as fast as her hooves could carry her, toward the edge of the forest, and the storm.

7. Ayes Or Neighs

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Lost In The Herd: Four

Teacup
Down On The
Farm

By Chatoyance

Chapter Seven: Ayes Or Neighs

Rain fell in cascading sheets, pounding the gasping pony like a million angry wet hooves.

Teacup stood hock deep in the oozing mud that the road had become, her eyelids fluttering from the slamming rain. Her milk-white coat was covered in bleeding scratches, crimson drooling down to swirl in the mud.

Lightning, bright as a thousand suns split the sky, the boom almost instantaneous with the flash, the sound so loud that it made the mud ripple from the impact.

The pale earth pony was a pathetic sight, her saddlebags already filled with water, her body shivering in the deluge. But as awful as she appeared, it was nothing compared to the condition of her soul; she had left her very first real friend, in all the world, to die in the slavering jaws of a monster from hell.

Teacup hadn't meant to do that. She had firmly meant to stand with Petal, to die with her if necessary. But when Petal had commanded her to run, the fear in her body had taken over, and nothing her horrified brain could do would stop her legs from running away. Now, that same body, so different from the human body she had once worn, stood shaking in the mud, frozen in abject terror.

MOVE. The thought burned in her consciousness. MOVE, LEG! With every element of her being she willed her front, right leg to lift. MOVE. Slowly, her hoof began to escape the sucking mud. WALK. Her right hoof went down again, pushing her forward. GO. The left rear leg creaked into motion, muscles fighting terrified rigidity. Leg after leg, hoof by hoof, Teacup willed her rebellious flesh to obey her commands.

Teacup forced herself from the liquified road, pushing with her front legs to free her hocks and gaskins from the mud. Her hind legs had briefly failed her, and she had resorted to dragging her own hindquarters from the mudpit. Her sodden tail trailed behind her like a dead snake.

Mechanically, she forced her body to march back towards the forest. Step after step, her hooves finally meeting rain submerged grass. Splashing through this, she made the edge of the Everfree, where her legs froze again from an overwhelming burst of fear.

Teacup slammed the side of her head against a tree. Her ears rang from the impact, pain arcing down her long neck. Her legs suddenly forgot to remain locked, the pain overriding everything else. Forward, FORWARD she stomped, faster and faster, pushing through the tearing nettles and the grasping underbrush.

She was inside the forest now, the rain gone, clear dark blue evening above. The sound of thunder was still loud behind her, beyond the border of the Everfree, but it became muffled as she plowed her way back to the clearing.

In the clearing was a curious sight. A leaping unicorn, cast in stone, rested on the forest floor, balanced on extended, bent legs, where it had crashed. It was a statue in mid-leap, still upright, horn lowered in defiant attack.

Hovering close, circling as if admiring the statue, the abomination laughed with a cruel, hissing voice.

Suddenly it spoke, in perfect Equestrian: "You will soon return to flesh, pony. But when you do, my teeth will already be around you, waiting. Think of that now. Your last experience will be my teeth tearing your head from you. In that moment, you will know that you had a chance, but that you failed. Think of that, while you wait." The voice hissed and spat as it said the words, and its single great eye roved over the stone pony with unholy glee.

Teacup stood in the cover of a large bush, the twisted branches digging into her flanks. It's intelligent, she thought. It can talk, it can think. Her eyes tried to focus on her friend. She's alive. She's alive somehow. She will turn back to flesh any moment.

Finally the fullness dawned on her: this creature is magic. It can turn things to stone.

Hopeless resignation began to descend like a black curtain dropping down across her thoughts. She was a farm pony, a mere earth pony. What could she do if a unicorn could do nothing?

Inside her, some pride remained. She was a Provender Pony. She was a gosh-darn Provender Farms Pony, and Missus Provender herself chose her. Missus Provender loved her, she was sure of it. No damnable critter was going to stop a Provender pony. Teacup didn't know how, but by Celestia herself, she was gonna save her friend and kick that sorry creature's horror movie ass.

Oh! More than being a Provender Pony, she was the real monster here! Oh yes. 'Teacup?' No, she was Tikvah Feinstein, a REAL monster from a planet of TRUE evil. Scary eyes and big teeth were nothing to a former member of a species that could genocide entire civilizations from the globe. She came from a people that had burned an entire world, a species that delighted in torturing children and exterminating entire phylums of animal life! She trotted out into the clearing.

"EAT ME TOO!" Teacup shouted.

The monstrous, floating sphere swiveled to stare, in surprise, at the ragged pony.

"Eat me raw, as I am. I want to die with my friend. Let me stand beside her, and you may bite both our heads off at the same time! I cannot live without her!"

The hovering abomination glared at her in shock. Then it began cackling like the sound of a thousand hooves scraping chalkboards, spinning slowly in delight. "Come, ridiculous pony. I will grant your request!" The horrific cackling laughter filled the clearing as Teacup trotted obediently over.

Teacup sidled up close to her friend, and stretched her head far out, so that it was even with that of Petal.

The creature cackled even more as it studied this display. Finally it bobbed over to face the two ponies, one flesh, one stone, all of its eyes focused on them. After a moment it opened its incredibly wide, jagged, dagger-toothed jaw, and slowly began to engulf the heads of the two Equestrians.

Teacup whipped her head out and fell on her side. Kicking the ground with her hooves she spun her body directly under the massive round shape, then pulled her legs in tight.

The monstrous creature pulled back from its meal. As it moved, Teacup shifted and kicked to stay underneath it. The horror spun, looking for the white pony. Teacup kept her limbs close.

"PoooOOOONYYY!!!" The loathsome orb was becoming angry. It floated away from the statue that was Petal Confetti, searching with all of its deadly eyes for any sign of the fleshy white mare. Teacup kicked and spun and twisted to stay always beneath the floating creature.

Suddenly, the abomination stopped. It was indeed intelligent, and had worked out where the mare had gone. The great, scaled sphere began to rotate, the mouth and central eye spinning down to face the ground. It prepared to bite the mare underneath it, its jaws wide and dripping, its massive central eye bulging in hellish delight.

As the scaled sphere slowly turned, Teacup scooted and squirmed away from the monstrosity, finally bringing herself to her hooves again, and stood staring at the horror's underbelly once more, as it chomped uselessly at the soil. This angered it beyond any hope of reason. Curse that wretched pony!

The sphere flipped with sudden fury, its long eye-stalks snapping like whips as it righted itself. Seeing nothing, it spun in place, and Teacup saw scales whirl in front of her until the edge of a vast eye started to come into view.

At this moment, Teacup reared up high on her hind legs, and as the great, wet eye slid into full view, she tore and ripped at it with her front hooves. Gouts of viscous, translucent ichor splattered over her coat and flooded from the sundered, shredded eye.

The horrific creature whirled back and around, shrieking in agony, fear, and shock. It crashed into the trees with a sickly, wet smash, then spun into the brambles screaming ever louder. The abomination's ten eyes writhed like snakes on their stalks, and from them weird beams of force randomly discharged. The trunk of a tree, struck by a searching beam dissolved into a cloud of sawdust, the remainder of the great oak crashing down upon its own stump.

Teacup ran to the stone shape of Petal, slamming into the concrete-like statue, which fell upon its side. Teacup lay flat beside it, and peeked over a stone flank.

The floating monster, insane with rage and suffering had already left the clearing. Teacup was not sure if it was fleeing, or if somehow it had been truly blinded with the loss of its central eye. She heard crashes and impacts for some time, as the monstrosity careened further and further away, the sounds gradually diminishing, swallowed by the forest.

For some time, Teacup lay beside the cold, stone thing that had been her friend. Suddenly, the stone that made up the statue began to crackle, and patches of color returned. Teacup saw the familiar aquamarine coat appear, and soft pink return to what had only moments before been a gray carving in the shape of a mane.

In moments, the newly living body of Petal Confetti took its first ragged breath, and as the Equestrian's revitalized eyes focused, they saw the scratched, bleeding face of Teacup, sobbing and laughing and shaking.

"H...Hey." Petal croaked out, through dry lips.

And in that moment Teacup was all over her, pressing herself close to her friend, wetting her with tears, crying into her mane. "I'm... all... alright." Petal tried to hold Teacup still with her legs, wrapping her front hooves over the sobbing pony's back "it's OK, it's OK, I'm alright! I'm alright!" They were that way for some time, until Teacup's sobs turned to choking and sniffles, and Petal had found herself crying too, partly with relief, and partly in sympathy with her friend.

When the two had gained some measure of balance, they worked quickly to collect their things which had spilled out into the clearing. Some could not be found, such as the little red book and Teacup's entire supply of candy, but they had their saddlebags, and they still had what bits they owned, and some of the hay-cakes they had bought in Withers for the journey.

They decided as one that it was not worth staying any longer, and chose to suffer some loss so as to leave the forest as quickly as they could, preferring to take their chances with the storm.

When they had made it to the border of the forest, they splashed out into the coat-soaking tail end of the deluge, which they could see was just being dismantled by distant, flying pegasai.

Teacup and Petal flopped to the sodden grass, then huddled close together for warmth. They shivered, wet and sore, and waited for the clouds to be removed, only to find the night sky behind them, the moon already risen. They were cold and shaking and miserable, and huddling together was not enough.

Wearily, the two ponies clambered to their hooves again, and leaned to support each other as they staggered down the grass beside the hopelessly muddy road. Teacup was wet and scratched and traumatized, and Petal was still stiff, sore, and in some state of shock. But they were alive, and they had survived mostly intact, and they had each other.

Teacup decided that they should eat all of the hay-cakes now, before moving on. The saddlebags had become filled with rainwater, and the traveling food resembled oatmeal more than cake at this point, it could only get worse. The two ponies gobbled what was left, and tried to wash the sticky remains out of the inside of the bags by trawling them through a particularly deep puddle of clear water. Putting their small stash of bits back into the bags, they returned to the painful business of making it to the next town, which would be Hoofington.

The two friends trudged through the night; neither could hope to sleep being so wet and uncomfortable, and walking made them feel a little warmer just from the use of their muscles.

When morning finally came, the ponies were mostly dry, though their saddlebags were still damp. There was no patch of ground that was not soaked for them to lie down on to rest. Tiredness gradually overcame them though, and the warm rays of Celestia's sun made them so drowsy they began to stumble.

Finally Petal said "I need sleep. I just gotta have some sleep. Let's lock legs and just take a nap, OK?"

Teacup and Petal locked their leg bones in place, leaning against each other for comfort as much as support, and fell into the sleep unique to a standing pony. Standing sleep is not as restful as sleep lying down, for there are no dreams, no REM sleep, but it nevertheless helps, and when they both woke up, it was just past noon. The sun had dried them well as they rested, and even their saddlebags were mostly dry now.

"I'm really hungry." Petal's stomach rumbled and gurgled as they limped on. Their legs were very sore now, and the many cuts and scrapes that covered Teacup clearly bothered her.

"Remember the party, remember the baked dandelions in cream?" Teacup began to drool a little, then realized it and quickly closed her mouth.

"I liked the carrot salad. What did they have in that, plums? or was it something else?"

"I think it was plums. Oh... I miss biscuits. I miss biscuits so much right now!" Teacup's belly sounded like a monster from the Everfree.

"They were really good biscuits."

"The best. I had them every day on the farm. Every day." Teacup's eyes watered up, and she had a hard time holding back tears.

Petal did not bother to say anything about Teacup's drooping ears, there was nothing she could think of to say. They briefly considered trying to nibble at the short grass that they walked upon, but as they were unsure just where the border of Equestria truly ended relative to the edge of the Everfree forest, and had no clear idea of just where the guarantee of safe grazing might lie, they decided not to take any more risks.

It was not until late afternoon that the two ponies finally saw the tall brick buildings of Hoofington. Tiled roofs replaced thatched cottages, and wide streets paved in cobblestones lay in place of the familiar dirt roads of South Withers and Clydesdale.

The ponies here wore clothing, sharp-looking frock coats on the stallions, and bustled dresses with tatted collars on the wealthier mares. Some wore hats, and Petal noticed not a few top hats among the mix. The citizens of Hoofington were not farmers.

The first order of business in Hoofington was food. They went straightaway to the first diner they saw, and pooled their bits. They had seventy-two of the small, golden coins between them, and while their ragged, filthy state drew stares of disdain, they cared little. They were starving.

Thick groat patties on oat and wheat buns were only five bits each, and neither could resist an oatshake, strawberry for Petal and apple and sweet carrot for Teacup. Hay fries were a must, and between them they were seventeen bits poorer, but marvelously full in their bellies. They rested a moment after their feast, savoring the feeling of sitting down with a full stomach in a warm place.

The next stop after 'The Groat Garden' was a visit to the local clinic to have Teacup's scrapes and scratches healed. The on-call medical unicorn performed magical healing, which cost ten bits. This left them with fourty-five bits. "Hoofington is a pretty expensive place" Teacup complained "back in Withers, we may not have had a unicorn, but the local doctor would have patched me up for free."

"So would my doctor friend in Clydesdale." Petal searched for some place they could stay "She's a pegasus, but she never needed magic to clean a cut or put on a bandage. Ten bits! I'm beginning to think I should have stayed at unicorn school now."

"Unicorn school?" Teacup hadn't heard of this.

"For the Newfoals. After Conversion, they separate the pegasai and the unicorns, right? so..."

"They do?"

"Y..Yes. You didn't know that?" Petal was taken slightly aback. Every Newfoal knew this.

"My Conversion was kind of... rushed. I was one of the very last to be converted. There weren't any more Bureaus at the end, they just rounded us up, herded us into transports and sprayed us down on the way." Teacup seemed very matter-of-fact about this.

"Sprayed...you down? You drink a liquid, it tastes like grape, sort of, and..." Petal stopped in the street "What do you mean sprayed you down?"

"Zero Point was coming. It was only hours away. Everypony was recalled to the safety of Equestria, and that included any last minute Newfoals like me. There wasn't time to foal-sit the hold outs, so they just sprayed us during transport. The spray did taste like grape, though, as I remember. Not very good grape." Teacup made a face and stuck out her tongue.

"Why did you wait so long to Convert?" Petal was astonished by all of this.

"I... my job was such that I just never heard about Equestria and Conversion and everything until the last day. If I'd known, I would have run to one of the Conversion Bureaus, if I could have." Teacup's ears splayed out sideways briefly, the pony equivalent of a shrug.

"Equestria was in the news for SEVEN YEARS, Teacup!" Petal had passed astonishment and had reached mildly enraged incredulity "Seven years! The barrier kept growing, they tried to bomb Equestria, they almost nuked it, the Conversion Bureaus were approved, the HLF was doing terrorist stuff... seven years! Eight, if you count the year before the Worldgov admitted the existence of Equestria! I... just don't know what to say!"

"Where did you live?" Teacup asked.

"Uh... Michigan. Petosky Michigan, by the lake. I Converted in Lancing. Why?" Petal seemed flustered.

"I lived in Wilmington, Jersey. It was one big hive city. What wasn't megacomplex was favela. We still had industry. Hyper crowded, security transport, living pods, Total Security Work Zones. I never even went outside for those five years. I lived in a box smaller than an outhouse. That's life in a megacomplex." Teacup did her ear-shrug again. "Then, I fled to South Africa, because I didn't know any better than to just run away. Any explanation I ever got came from frightened refugees who didn't know much more than I did!"

"In Michigan, there was no industry left. The whole zone was pretty much empty, everypony had moved away. It was all ruins and mostly empty buildings, abandoned factories and such. We didn't have slums, there just weren't that many ponies...um. humans." Petal felt strange remembering those days.

"That's because all the humans that left places like Michigan crowded around the last remaining industry! We followed the remaining jobs, and the only hope of getting one was around the megacomplexes. 'Go where the food is', right? Or, where the jobs are. How did you survive in Michigan if it was so empty?" Teacup watched a carriage go by, pulled by earth ponies. In the carriage were unicorns in fancy dress.

"Basic Worldcorp minimum income. Just like everypony. Didn't you have that?" Petal followed Teacup's gaze, and watched the unicorn couple exit the carriage.

"Of course - I didn't know they'd even bother with a no-industry zone. We had food rations, like you, but I wanted more. I wanted a chance to, I guess, better myself. It didn't actually work out that way though." Teacup's ears dropped for a moment.

"Wow, Teacup, I didn't realize that our experiences had been so different." Petal had an idea "Come on! I know what we can do!" Petal trotted towards the earth pony carriage team, stopping briefly to make sure Petal followed.

The carriage team was Boxer Socks and Wilberhoof, two stallions with quite a nose for the city. They were glad to tell the two mares where they might find an inexpensive place to stay for the night, and gave them clear directions. Petal and Teacup thanked the kindly pair, and set out for the corner of Stifle and Croup, where a room could be had for only five bits a night. It was not the fanciest or wealthiest part of Hoofington, but this was Equestria, not earth, they reminded themselves, so it was not as if they would be in any danger. There were no 'bad' parts of any town in Equestria, not in the sense of the risk of horrific violence, anyway.

The Coronet was a large, somewhat run-down place, which had, in the past, been quite the hotel. Now, it had fallen on hard times, and had become the home of many working ponies in the big city. At five bits a day, most city wages for even the most menial of jobs could easily cover a room at the Coronet, and Petal found that they were both fortunate that there were any rooms available at all. Most tenants had been in their rooms for years, as they worked toward various goals.

Petal and Teacup enjoyed the building's communal showers, reveling in hot water, soap, and feeling clean again. They brushed each others coats and manes, and retired to their room. It mattered not that they had to share a single bed, the simple joy of comfortable sleep was a luxurious treasure to them at this point.

But Petal found her mind racing when she tried to drift off to sleep, despite how tired she felt. What they had been through flashed over and over in her thoughts. Then she felt Teacup press up against her back, and the warmth and softness comforted her, and almost to her amazement, she soon found herself deeply asleep.

8. Working For Change

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Lost In The Herd: Four

Teacup
Down On The
Farm

By Chatoyance

Chapter Eight: Working For Change

Teacup made another batch of biscuits. Mr. Nibbles -everyone in the restaurant just called him 'Tasty'- trotted over and watched the violet-maned mare as she stirred with a spoon in her teeth. "Just wanted to say that our business has gone up ever since you arrived. Good job Teacup!"

Teacup grinned around the long, wooden spoon. She enjoyed working at 'Nibbles', and the bits she was earning were just what she and Petal needed.

Somewhere, across town, Petal was out doing courier work for Speed Pony Delivery. Although she was not a fast, flying pegasus like the image on their logo, she had background enough, and skills enough, to be hired. Together they brought in sixty bits a week. They had a three-day work week, like most Hoofingtonians, overlapping their jobs with others who shared their positions. The bits were piling up, even with rent and the occasional feast. This was more money than either had ever made in their lives out in the country.

Both had quickly realized, after their first day in Hoofington, that travel was going to be much more expensive than they had imagined, and if they were going to see their quest through, they would need the bits to do it. Working for a while in the city was an excellent way to make the bits they needed quickly, and so they had gone out and found employment.

For Petal, it was fairly easy; her background in delivery fit well with the need for couriers at Speed Pony. But Teacup had only ever worked on a farm, and for the first week, she was at a loss. Petal assured her that she needn't worry so much, that her Speed Pony job was sufficient to support them, and it was just that it might take a little longer to save up for travel.

Teacup didn't like feeling useless, though, so as she wandered the streets each day, she struggled to find something she could do in the big city.

She turned a corner and smelled something that filled her with happy memories; the same sort of oat smoothie that Missus Provender had made for her long ago. Following that smell had led her to 'Nibble's Country Kitchen'. The help wanted sign encouraged her, and a quick demonstration of Missus Provender's Prize Winning Biscuits sealed the deal with the owner, Tastee Nibbles.

She had been working at the restaurant for six weeks now, and had proven herself to be an excellent employee. It was already clear that Mr. Nibbles wanted her to stay indefinitely, further, she was enjoying her new life in Hoofington so much that it was all too easy to forget entirely about her original plan.

Hoofington held many fascinations for Teacup and her friend Petal. There were shows to see, plays and musicals and strange avant-garde performance pieces the like of which neither had ever imagined. There was certainly no shortage of interesting and delicious foods from all over Equestria, and the temptation to 'eat fancy' every night was great. It became harder and harder to save up to continue their journey when the excitement of the city called out to them.

One night, at a cafe they had come to frequent, Petal broached this issue.

"Hoofington has been pretty darn good to us. What do you think, Teacup?"

Teacup bit into a crunchy roll and then sipped her water thoughtfully "It really has been good. I can't remember having this much fun. I hate to say it, but I find myself forgetting about the farm. I mean, the musical last night - that was just great!"

Petal giggled "It was pretty funny, too. Remember the part where the magical chicken sang?" it hadn't been a real chicken, of course, but the costume worn by the performing pony had been particularly whimsical.

"Gosh, yes! That was awesome!" Teacup giggled with Petal at the memory. "These past weeks have just been great!"

"I've been thinking... in all of that time, have you once had any troubling memories?" Petal had a strange look on her face.

"Huh? I don't know what you mean."

"About Earth. About before." Petal said the words quietly, as if afraid another table might hear.

"Oh!" Teacup was slightly startled "That. Funny... I really haven't. Not once. It's like all of that just went away for me. I haven't thought about any of that since I started working at 'Nibbles'. It's kind of strange. I guess there's just so much else to think about here."

"You know, we don't strictly have to continue the plan. We're making decent money, if we wanted to, we could even move to a bigger place. We could stay in Hoofington... for a while." The way Petal had said 'a while' somehow suggested a very indefinite period of time indeed.

Teacup fell quiet for a moment. "Is... is that what you think we should do? What if we start feeling sad again? It isn't like our pasts have gone away." She looked uncomfortable now "Besides... I worry about Cornflower and Durum, back on the farm. I feel a little guilty having all this fun, while they're stuck without any help. Harvest will be coming up in a month or two..." Teacup's voice trailed off and her ears drooped a little.

"It was just a thought, Teacup. Just a thought." Their main course had been brought by a unicorn waiter, who floated their plates down to the table. "This looks tasty! One thing is for sure - we eat pretty well here." The unicorn smiled at Petal's comment and turned to another table.

"I did think of one thing, though." Teacup sounded strange and serious now.

"What?" mumbled Petal through a mouthful of pasta.

"Back when... when we were in the forest. When you were turned... when you were in trouble." Teacup hadn't touched her pasta yet "I was really afraid, and I couldn't turn back from the road."

"But you did! You were brilliant, Teacup! You kicked that creatures' ass! You totally rocked that thing! You saved us both!"

"I never could have done that, I really would have just run away, except..." Teacup's face contorted with strong, mixed emotions.

"Except... for what, Teacup?" Petal had stopped eating to pay more attention to her friend.

"I remembered my life on Earth. I remembered my days in the favela, in the slums. I remembered what it meant to be human. I felt like...." Teacup's head sank "...Like the biggest monster in that forest. Like I was the real monster, and when I felt that, I felt like I could kill that thing."

Petal broke the silence that followed Teacup's words "Then I am grateful to your days in those slums. You saved my life, Teacup. If that part of your past gave you the courage to fight, then I am grateful for it, as I am grateful to you." Petal paused for a moment "'Eat me too! I can't live without her!' - that was just the cleverest trick ever!"

"It wasn't entirely just a trick." Teacup stared at her pasta "I wasn't... I couldn't just leave you like that. I couldn't have lived with myself if I had."

Petal looked at Teacup for a bit "Then I guess that makes you my Bestest Friend Ever, Teacup!"

When Teacup looked up, she was greeted by a soft smile that somehow shone brighter in her heart than the biggest grin. "Best friends?" she asked.

"The very best." Petal was definite.

Several weeks passed after that, with work and the delights of the city consuming the pair. They discovered the park, and enjoyed strolling its beautifully cultivated gardens. They found that Hoofington had a concert hall, and found the charms of the symphony. They spent a very silly afternoon in a toy store, imagining an Equestrian childhood they had never known.

Then one day, they chanced across the bookstore.

Unicorn Books was an entire store dedicated to books about magic. Thaumaturgy was their specialty, and their stock. Row after row of tomes, thick and thin, inexpensive pamphlets as well as incredibly costly tomes filled the tidy shelves. New books, rare books, even a section in the back devoted to ancient scrolls, carefully preserved inside a glass case, greeted their astonished eyes.

The two newfoals wandered in silence. They had never seen a bookstore like this. It seemed somehow sacrilegious to speak above a whisper. This feeling did not extend to the sharply dressed, monocled unicorn that approached them "May I be of assistance today?" he boomed, in a voice that made Teacup jump a little.

"We...I am interested in..." Petal apparently felt the same way as Teacup did "Ahem. Let me start again." Teacup could tell that Petal was putting on a false persona. "I and my assistant here are intrigued by the relationship between thaumatic practice and mnemotechnics."

Teacup was always impressed when Petal pulled out the part of her that had, as she had once explained, 'been sort of a unicorn' even back when she had been human. Petal clearly had a head full of all sorts of knowledge and thoughts that she tended to keep hidden behind her light-hearted personality, and Teacup found it fascinating when that side of her friend showed itself.

"I have a theory - more of a hypothesis, really - that thaumatic forces underlie the functions of the mind, specifically the domain of memory itself. Are we magical beings merely inhabiting flesh, as one would clothing, and can it be proven? I think it can, and the answer must lie in the way that memories are retained, for memory is existence itself -without memory there would be no knowledge of identity, do you see?" Petal, in that moment, seemed like the most distinguished of researchers. It also helped that she had left her aging saddlebags at home.

Canter Star, the proprietor, was intrigued by Petal's concept "I see, I see... a most interesting premise. I think we may be able to be of some assistance. This way. I assume you are with the college of magic? Of course you are, this way, this way."

Petal did not feel inclined to disabuse the well-appointed unicorn of his assumptions, thus she and Teacup followed after him silently.

An entire row had been given to spells that affected consciousness and the mind, and it was clear that this was a section not appropriate for general use, but instead reserved for those involved in higher research, likely with some kind of clearance. Mr. Star left them there; thankfully another pony had entered the store, eliminating the need for further interaction, which might have accidentally revealed their true backgrounds.

Teacup kept watch on the bookstore proprietor, while Petal scanned tomes as fast as she could. When Teacup looked down briefly, she saw Petal using her horn to levitate multiple volumes, while simultaneously flipping through their pages at a rapid pace. Raising her head again, she saw Mr. Star busy with a new pair of unicorns that had just entered. They were dressed as if they had just come from a very fancy party in the wealthiest part of town.

Teacup heard a book slam shut behind her, an almost palpable 'thwap'. As she turned her head, she saw books slamming back into the shelf. "Ok, let's go." Petal motioned with her nose in the direction of the door. Teacup knew to follow Petal's lead, and they made their way to the exit. Mr. Star was occupied, so Petal used her horn to stifle the bell above the door until they were outside, and the door closed behind them.

They were some blocks away before Teacup spoke "So? What did you learn? What happened?"

Petal's ears flicked as if she had been awakened from some deep reverie. "Magic that affects the mind and the memory is surprisingly easy to learn. You can even figure out how to do it on your own, apparently, if you just know some simple basics. But..."

Petal stopped at the corner and turned to Teacup "There's a catch. All of that sort of thing is considered dangerous magic, because it can potentially violate the free will of others, and that is a big no-no in Equestria. There are some surprisingly serious punishments for playing with any of it, and the suggestion exists that..." Petal looked left and right as if worried about being overheard "There is apparently a garden near the palace in Canterlot, a garden with a hedge maze. Outside that garden are statues. Some are creatures, but most are ponies, just like us. They date back centuries."

Teacup wasn't sure what Petal meant. "Statues, okay, so...?"

"There is some speculation that those statues used to be living ponies. Ponies that may have used magic... incorrectly."

"Wait a minute. Capital punishment? In Equestria? I don't believe that!" Teacup felt like her world had just turned upside down.

"Think about it. What would you do, if you were Celestia, or Luna, and somepony started, say, raising an army of mind-controlled citizens, or started using mind magic for some terrible scheme?"

"But...but nopony would do that! These aren't humans here, Petal! They have no guile, no evil in them! They don't even know what war is, they don't even have police, because they don't have crime!" Teacup was not happy at any of this.

"Celestia has royal guards. Why would the Goddess of the Sun have guards. Armored guards?"

Teacup was feeling upset with Petal. "Griffons! Monsters from the Everfree like we fought! Dragons! There are all kinds of creatures that could suddenly show up! It doesn't mean she needs guards to protect her from evil ponies!"

"Not evil." Petal stared at her "Just misguided. They probably thought they were trying to help some cause or some purpose that might benefit everypony. Doesn't make them any less dangerous, though, if they were to refuse to stop."

"That's even worse! I won't accept that!" This was the first unpleasant conversation Teacup had ever had with Petal. It was bordering on an argument. "Celestia would never do such a thing! Ponies would never do... well... even misguided they wouldn't refuse... and if they did, Celestia definitely wouldn't do what you suggest. She wouldn't!"

The two mares crossed the street, and walked towards their room at the Coronet in silence.

When they had finished their preparations for bed, Petal brought the topic up again.

"You saved me because you remembered your hard life on Earth. You crippled or outright killed that monster, even though you are a pony, just like anypony else. Equestrians may be innately kinder than humans, I won't argue that point, in fact I agree. I am certain that the Equestrian brain is wired for compassion, cooperation, and simple kindness in ways the old human brain never was." Teacup really didn't want to deal with this, but Petal needed to talk.

"Pony or not, you still had the capacity to take extreme action when you needed to. When you felt it was justified." Petal gave Teacup a little half-smile, trying to defuse the tension "All I'm saying is that even a gentle creature can become potentially dangerous, if a convincing justification is there. And magic is vastly more dangerous than any gun. Teacup, I saw relatively simple spells in those books that, if misused, could turn an entire city against itself. Trivial spells."

Teacup's mind could not help but race ahead where the implication led; if trivial spells could do that, then a serious spell could... do almost anything? How could a pony with that kind of power be controlled, if they were certain they were in the right?

It was a very long, and very troubling night, and neither pony got as much sleep as they wished.

9. Asking For Nothing

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Lost In The Herd: Four

Teacup
Down On The
Farm

By Chatoyance

Chapter Nine: Asking For Nothing

Teacup walked in silence. Her saddlebags, bearing the chop of Provender Farms, were heavy on her back, filled with provisions for the journey. She and Petal were much better outfitted than when they had left the farming community of South Withers months ago.

Petal Confetti walked beside her, struggling somewhat under her own load, but determined that she not appear weak in front of her earth pony companion. Her new, city-bought saddlebags bore the custom design of her own cutie mark, a pink ribbon falling amidst a cloud of multicolored confetti. Inside her bags was more than food, water and candy, for she hauled books, two thick tomes and three thin volumes, all of which were about the study of magic.

They had finally left Hoofington, the city that had brought them such happiness for so long. But a chance discovery of a bookstore had led to disturbing knowledge that Equestria may not have been quite as perfect a realm as they had imagined: even here the necessities of authoritarian rule appeared to require severe solutions for the preservation of the security of the state, and severity is seldom a gentle or a kindly thing.

Did Princess Celestia, goddess-ruler of Equestra, really turn ponies to stone? The suggestion was there that those who had - in Celestia's judgement - abused the awesome power of magic may have been given a uniquely magical form of capital punishment; perpetual petrification. They had become statues in her gardens, reminders to all that her authority was not to be questioned.

There was no proof, nothing definite, nothing... concrete. But books both ancient and respected had raised the possibility, with some authors certain in the matter, and the thought that this was so had greatly troubled Petal, but even more greatly troubled Teacup.

For Teacup was driven by the consuming need to erase her human history, to erase her memories of once having been from a world of pain and despair. The experience of human life had scarred her, and she felt she could never truly be happy so long as any taint of that terrible place remained in her heart.

But Petal had begun to doubt the worth of their shared mission. Petal had noted the usefulness of their newfoal status, of the very thing that set them apart from all natural-born Equestrians. There was strength in those painful memories, and fierceness enough to survive even the horrors of the uncontrolled and chaotic Everfree forest. She was now alive only because Teacup had been empowered by her earthly past, and Petal herself had begun to catalog the ways in which her human history made her experience of Equestria a grateful joy that no native pony could hope to experience.

Before the two had left Hoofington, they had gone for one last afternoon in their favorite park.

Petal, feeling playful, had decided to try something that she had witnessed a tiny filly do when they had entered the park. Petal let herself drop to the soft, manicured grass, and began to roll in it, luxuriating in the cool softness. She squirmed on her back, giggling at the simple pleasure of innocent fun.

When at last she rolled onto her belly, legs splayed, mane mussed, she noticed a number of adult ponies looking at her. Instantly the part of her that had been human began to scream in her mind of judgements and condemnations. She had acted out in public, she would be seen as insane, she would be found immature, she would be judged foolish and childish and ridiculous. Images of human faces showing contempt filled her thought, and a dim memory of having been kicked by a cruel child on a playground for a similar act in her youth assailed her.

The adult ponies smiled. Two of them dropped to the grass and began rolling on it themselves. "Wheee! Oh, this IS fun!" one exclaimed.

Petal's mouth dropped slowly open.

Her heart began to warm. The discordant human faces receded in her memory. An overwhelming feeling of happiness and gratefulness filled her, for this was an inconceivable outcome. No scorn. No judgement. Just happy ponies rolling on the grass, adult ponies, devoid of anything but joy in the moment.

She looked around her at the park. Healthy green trees stood against a perfect cerulean sky. Wisps of perfectly clean, white cloud drifted in the distance, chased by colorful pegasai. Beyond the park a big, beautiful city, devoid of crime, or smog, or danger bounded her vision. And beneath her, a perfect lawn of sweet smelling grass.

Her senses flooded, her mind shorn of her previous darkness, she lay on her belly in a perfect bliss. In that moment, her mind could not help but compare this scene with her earthly life before Equestria, and instantly her joy compounded. She began to weep, tears rolling out of her large, shining eyes, in gratitude for existing in a moment such as this.

That which the native Equestrians saw as normal, she saw as extraordinary, for her, the ordinary was a precious, exotic gift. Even the most trivial of things could bring her the delight of unearthly wonder.

Equestria was a marvelous and magical fairyland, but she alone, as a newfoal, could experience each day as the exquisite wonder it truly was; native Equestrians saw only another day, no different than the last. They had nothing to compare their world with, save itself.

She would lose that precious gift, if she lost the comparison between Equestria and the extinguished Earth. It is true she might feel less apart, but she would also lose the specialness of her unique point of view.

This awareness had begun to trouble her, as she and Teacup walked.

Ahead was Ponyville, a small town famed for its apples, and its library, which had been constructed inside the hollows of a gigantic tree. Here, it was said, Celestia herself sponsored the librarian, with books that occasionally rivaled even the collection inside of Canterlot castle itself.

Petal had met the librarian once, briefly, during her Conversion. Two of the original six ambassadors from Equestria had made a tour of the Bureaus, and one of the stops of that tour had been the very location that Petal had gone to to become an Equestrian.

But that was long ago, and it was not like she personally knew those elevated Equestrians, rather she had simply happened to exist in one of the places they had visited. She doubted that she would be remembered, and did not expect to be.

Teacup and Petal stopped just outside the town. Beyond lay thatched cottages, stone bridges and a decorative city hall, tiny in the distance like models in a window display.

"Well, what do we do?" Teacup wanted a definite answer to the question that had hung over them since they had left Hoofington.

There were three paths worth consideration to them now. One path would be to approach the Princesses directly, and ask them to erase their memories of earth, finally making them completely normal Equestrians, untainted by memories of pain and sorrow. But this path was uncertain, for the Princesses might deny their request, and that denial, lest they wanted to be imprisoned in stone, was doubtless absolute. Still, it seemed the better option to Petal.

Another path was to go to the library in Ponyville, and ask the librarian there, a former ambassador to earth, for her help. There was some hope that she might grant their request, but if she did not, at least they would not have faced the absolute denial of the Princesses. Petal had misgivings about this second choice.

The third option was to hide out somewhere, and for Petal to apply what she believed she had learned from the books she was carrying. Petal had acquired, finally, the basic principles needed to construct a functioning memory spell. The use of such magic was not difficult, in some ways it was even trivial; but the ease with which it could be performed did not reflect on the severity of what it represented, nor the power that it commanded. Petal felt reasonably confident that her custom spell would accomplish its task, but the consequences of using it filled her with concern.

Though she still did not know the full details, it was clear that magic which affected the mind was considered dangerous, possibly even subversive, and she did not want to incur the wrath of two enraged goddesses. Petal thought of the statues in the garden at Canterlot.

"Teacup... I have concerns. I have doubts..."

"Oh, THAT again!" Teacup had grown weary of what she perceived as cowardice, or at best, indecisiveness on the part of Petal. "We've come all this way, months to get here! No more nonsense, Petal! Come on, let's DO this!" Teacup stormed off, no longer willing to stand before the entrance to the town. It appeared that she had chosen the second option, and that was that.

Petal shrugged with her ears, and ambled on after. There was nothing more she could say that Teacup would listen to.

Ponyville was a pretty place, about the size of South Withers, but very different in layout. Above the town, high in the nearby mountains, Canterlot itself could be seen, built into the side of a vast cliff. The castle overlooked the valley in which Ponyville was set, and Petal felt as if the eyes of the Princesses were upon her neck as they made their way through the small town.

"I'm hungry." Petal said the words before she knew she had, and they weren't entirely true. She felt a hollowness in her stomach, but it was not from hunger but from some kind of dread. The moment she said the words, she understood that some part of her was simply trying to delay reaching the library, but perhaps that was not a bad thing. "Let's grab a bite first, then head to the library, Ok?"

Teacup was still grumpy, but she saw no harm in having a snack, they were there, close to a library that might very well hold the answer she sought. Perhaps a little food might help Petal feel more confident. Teacup needed Petal to be at her best, the unicorn understood magical things that she herself did not.

Sitting on hay-bale seats, outdoors, at a small eatery, Teacup thought about how close she now was to her goal. She remembered her decade at Provinder Farm and worried for Missus Provender and her husband Durum. She reflected on how much she had enjoyed her time in Hoofington, with Petal. But Petal had become difficult in the last week, constantly fussing over whether or not what they had set out to do was too risky. Her fears had come to annoy Teacup, and she could not understand why Petal couldn't understand that the necessity of completing their task outweighed any risk.

Still, she felt Petal had more experience of this world than she had, and it was better to get an important thing done right, than it was to try to rush and meet failure. More than this, Petal's attitude had started to get to her; she was pushing forward from fear that she would begin to lose her nerve.

They could never be happy, not like other ponies, as long as the trauma of earthly life haunted them! Surely Petal could still see this? A few months of fun in a welcoming city changed nothing. If she lost her drive, Teacup knew she would never gain it back. This was her one chance to cure her inner pain, and Petal's as well. Why couldn't Petal understand this?

Teacup reasoned that it surely must be because Petal had an easier life on Earth than she did. Petal had been safe and mostly alone in abandoned Michigan. She simply had no idea of what life had really been like for most humans back then. That said, earth was earth, and she had clearly been traumatized by her life there. This was absolutely for Petal's own good as well as for her own.

Their food arrived.

Petal, also lost in thought, began nibbling hay fries. Suddenly, she saw a familiar face.

A pink pony with curly hair hopped joyfully down the street. It was Pinkamena Pie, one of the ambassadors to earth chosen by the Princesses. Petal had briefly met her during her Conversion, and Pie had encouraged her. She thought briefly about going to her and thanking her for her kindness, but then stopped. There was no reason that such a famous pony would even remember her, and bothering her would just be selfish. Petal lowered her head, instead, so that her own pink mane drifted in front of her eyes. That was enough.

The snack had not taken much time, and Teacup was eager to get to the library. There was nothing to be done. Whatever awaited them, Petal could not delay it further. Reluctantly, she stood up and together they paid and left.

The Ponyville library had indeed been made from a hollowed tree, gigantic beyond earthly possibility, but this was not earth. Petal noted that the tree was still alive, somehow, and its healthy leaves spread above like a vast umbrella of green. A sign outside displayed the pictogram for 'library', unsurprisingly an open book, however this pictogram was fully illustrated and not the simple, abstract shape normally used in writing.

An arched, triangular door was set into the tree, and like all Equestrian doors, it could easily be swung open with a nod of the head.

Inside, a circular room greeted them, carved entirely out of the living core of the tree. Rounded shelves lined the walls, carved into the seamless wood, and stairs curved up to a balcony level. The library was small, quaint even, compared to any Hoofington equivalent, but in its uniqueness, it was beautiful, and quite wondrous to see.

"HELLO?" Teacup didn't know if this was a library where one was expected to whisper, or a library where no such rule applied, but she was here on a quest, and she wanted immediate assistance.

A small creature, the likes of which neither pony had ever seen before, descended the stairs. Teacup stepped back, quickly, preparing to fight if necessary; her experience in the Everfree had left her uneasy around strange creatures. It rapidly dawned on her, however, that the scaly entity was quite small, and it seemed very young. The creature had innocent eyes, devoid of malice. It was a little, purple dragon, almost certainly a baby.

"Hello! Oh! I haven't seen you before. New to Ponyville? Welcome to the library!" The little dragon stood proudly, his short arms gesturing at the sweep of the room "Name's Spike. What can I do you for?"

Teacup stepped forward "I'm Teacup, and this is my friend Petal." Teacup nodded at Petal "We are looking for someone who knows something about magic, and we've heard that the librarian here might have what we need."

Petal shifted uncomfortably. She hadn't told Teacup all the details of her Conversion experience, and she suddenly had a feeling that in this case, she just might be remembered by the librarian here, after all.

"Then you need Twilight! She knows more about magic than anypony in Equestria. Except the Princesses, of course. But other than them, she's the best!"

"Great!" Teacup was pleased. "That's what I expected from one of the ambassadors!"

"Ambassadors..?" The little dragon blinked "You... must be newfoals then?" Teacup nodded. "Wow, I haven't heard that used in, like, ten years. Hardly any newfoals around now, they all went to settle in the new lands."

The dragon called 'Spike' put a claw to his face "Hmmm... Twilight really should've been back by now. You're certainly welcome to wait for her. We have books to pass the time -" He waved at the room "but I suppose that's kind of obvious, isn't it? Um, is there anything I can find for you?"

"Not really." Teacup shook her head. Petal had suggested keeping a low profile until they could judge the situation.

"Actually," Petal looked around "If you have any books on memory and magic, it wouldn't hurt to take a look." Teacup gave Petal a glance at such an open admission of their purpose.

"Sure we do!" The little dragon ran to a ladder off to their right and carried it to a section off to the left. He climbed quickly, clearly he was experienced at finding books on these shelves. "OK, we have 'Better Memory In Just Three Spells' - that's one of Twilight's favorites - and "Memory Techniques Of The Unicorn Sages", Twi says that one isn't as good as they claim." Spike began pulling the books from the shelf, holding the increasing stack with one claw while balancing on the ladder. He was surprisingly good at it.

"No, no, thank you... Spike, was it?" Petal had clopped over to the base of the ladder and was looking up "I'm more interested in forgetting things than in remembering. Do you have any books on that?"

Spike was surprised "Forgetting? Why would you want to forget anything? It's hard enough to remember stuff that needs remembering as it is!"

"My friend here wants to forget her life before becoming a pony. It makes her sad to have to remember. It hurts her."

Teacup was stunned. Petal had just spilled all the beans, just like that, to this little dragon creature. Petal was the one who was so afraid of being discovered! She was the one that had been making such a fuss over anyone finding out. What was Petal up to? Or had she had some kind of change of heart? Teacup didn't know what to make of it.

"Well... that's understandable, I guess. I saw that world, back then, and it was not a nice place at all. I could never figure out why some of your kind wanted to keep it." Spike put the books in his claw back, climbed back down and moved the ladder a few feet. "I think we have something that might help, but I'll have to check. Forgetting things isn't a big demand subject."

Teacup crept close to Petal "What's going on? I thought you were so worried about anypony finding out?" she said in a low whisper.

"It doesn't matter, now, Teacup." Petal looked resigned "If Twilight can't, or won't help us, we either do it on our own, or we go to the Princesses, so at this point it really doesn't matter who knows. Twilight reports directly to Celestia, so she'll find out in any case." Petal paused for a moment "Once we entered Ponyville, our options were set in stone." Was that a smirk on Petal's face?

Teacup pondered this. "So that's why you were dragging your hooves. I guess it hadn't really sunk in to me that the librarian here had such a close connection to the Princesses. I mean I kind of knew, but.."

"Celestia is her personal teacher, Teacup. I thought we talked about this." Petal was slightly annoyed.

"Yeah, maybe we did, it was quite a few weeks ago." Teacup looked down "We were pretty busy in the city, you know."

Spike had returned down the ladder with a single book "Like I said, not much need for books on forgetting things. This is what we have: 'Forbidden Secrets Of Mental Magic.' Oh, that doesn't sound good. To tell you the truth, I think we should wait for Twi-"

"Hello!" The door opened, and through it had entered a purple unicorn with swept bangs and a light streak through her mane. She was floating a bakery box beside her, which she set down on the floor. "What's up, Spike?"

Teacup turned to face the new pony. She assumed that this must be Twilight Sparkle, one of the original ambassadors, as well as the student of Celestia. Because she had never seen any of the newsfeeds about the rise of Equestria, she did not recognize the unicorn on sight.

"Whoa. It's you." Teacup was surprised to find the purple unicorn staring at Petal "You're the one that wanted to be 'anything but a unicorn'." Petal seemed a little chagrined. "I'd never heard anything like that from any human before. Except for you."

Petal quickly changed the subject "We need your help, Ambassador Sparkle."

"Ambassador? No, no, no-no-no. Just 'Twilight'. I've tried to put those days behind me. That was a rough time, no offense." Twilight walked over to Spike and gave him a nuzzle. In doing that she noticed the book "'Forbidden Secrets Of Mental Magic'? What kind of help are we talking about here?" Twilight seemed a little wary now.

Teacup and Petal explained their story, the reason they had set out, and something of their adventures. It turned out that the box that Twilight had brought contained little dessert cakes from a local bakery; these were shared along with Teacup and Petal's adventures.

Finally Teacup pleaded with the purple unicorn to help her and her friend, begging Twilight to free them from the burden of remembering their earthly lives.

Twilight did not look happy. "I understand what you want, and I certainly know how to do it." Teacup was overjoyed! "But...."

"But what? You can help us!"

"Magic like that is classed as mind magic. Magic that affects the mind or the will is not exactly considered appropriate. I once made a mistake with that sort of magic, and I almost got in serious trouble with the Princess. Really serious trouble."

Teacup looked like she might cry "But we're asking you to do this. We'll take full responsibility for it. I'll sign a waiver, or write down that it was all my idea! I'll do whatever you want! We've come so far!"

"I'm not sure I feel that would be enough. I won't do anything that might make the Princess upset with me. I don't even want to think about making the Princess angry. I'm sorry."

Tears started to form in Teacup's eyes. This was the whole point of her journey, the entire reason she had left Missus Provender and the farm. They'd been through so much. She just wanted to be happy. Why did it have to be such a big deal?

"I'll tell you what..." Twilight felt sorry for the white mare "I could ask Princess Celestia about your situation. I could ask her if it would be permissible for me to help you. And if she says yes, I will!" The purple unicorn gave a little decisive nod of her head, and a little smile. "I should know by tomorrow, say about noon?"

"But..." Teacup was upset, but she knew when to shut up. "Thank you. That would be very kind." Teacup turned to Petal. "Petal, we should go and get a room for the night, let's leave and stop bothering these nice ponies." Teacup blinked "Ur... dragon. Pony and dragon. Sorry." she smiled weakly at Spike.

Teacup and Petal purchased a room at a local inn, just down the road. When they had gotten to their room, and set down their saddlebags, Teacup was frantic "You said you know how to do this stuff now, right? Right?"

"Teacup?" Petal was taken aback by her outburst.

"Celestia will never allow it. You said as much yourself, how it should have been done from the very start but it wasn't and how that was a sign that it would never be allowed and..."

"Teacup. Teacup! Settle down, hey... come on. Teacup!" Petal nuzzled her friend, and laid her head over Petal's back.

"She won't allow it and you can't fight a freaking goddess, there's those statues and we'll be stuck and..."

"Teacup...shhhh... shhhh..." Petal had never seen the sturdy earth pony act this way.

Teacup pulled away. "Petal. Erase my memory. Now. Do it now. You said you know how. So do it."

Petal stared at her friend "No. I won't. I won't do that. I'm sorry, Teacup."

"Coward!"

Petal just stood, silent. Her gentle expression was answer enough.

"Fine." Teacup laid down on one of the two beds, facing away.

Petal did not sleep well at all. Her mind raced with the strange panic that had overcome Teacup. She knew that her friend had suffered a more difficult life on earth than she had. Perhaps she simply couldn't imagine just how terrible that life had been.

For her part, Petal had already decided that she did not want her memory erased after all. She had made her decision before they had left Hoofington, when she realized how much she treasured feeling such overwhelming wonder at this new world. Only comparison made that possible; if she lost her experience of her suffering, Equestria would become the only world she knew of, and thus ordinary to her, and that was a loss she felt was too great. Still, she was willing to help Teacup, for it was clear that the earth pony did not share her outlook.

For Teacup, her experience at the library had only seemed to confirm her worst fears. It was plainly obvious to her now that the heavenly realm she had believed Equestria was, had a dark and terrifying side to it. The gentle and loving goddess she had assumed Celestia to be had become in her mind a tyrant, capable of anything. She now fully believed that those statues Petal had spoken of were former subjects that had merely displeased the Princess; it seemed clear that Celestia was capable of capital punishment on a whim. This wonderland had become just another earth, ruled by sociopaths. She desperately wished she had never left the farm.

It was truly hopeless now, and Teacup had not felt hopelessness in over a decade. She had never felt hopeless even once within Equestria, until now. Gritting her teeth in her bed, she also felt she understood Petal now. Every pony for themselves. Petal would never risk the anger of Celestia to help her. Petal could have used magic to fix her already by now, but she had not. Teacup understood that. Petal would be a fool to risk anything. Equestria was just like Wilmington. It was just like Jersey. It was just like Earth.

That is what hurt the most, Teacup decided. Equestria itself had betrayed her. It was no perfect, beautiful world. It was just another Earth, only earlier in time, before the rise of Big Industry. Give it time. Skyscrapers and smog and organ thieves were just a few centuries away. Maybe another universe would rise and eat Equestria, one day, in turn. That would be fitting, she thought, before exhaustion stole her waking mind away from her.

10. Everything Is Amazing

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Lost In The Herd: Four

Teacup
Down On The
Farm

By Chatoyance

Chapter Ten: Everything Is Amazing

Teacup nibbled at her haycakes with maple syrup. It was not Provender Farm styled biscuits for breakfast, but Teacup had come to enjoy this alternate morning meal during her month and a half in Hoofington. There had been a little eatery on her way to work back then, and she always felt famished when she awakened. This morning, however, butterflies already filled her stomach, for she was filled with a mixture of excitement and apprehension that made eating difficult.

She noticed that Petal also seemed to have a small appetite, and the worried look on her face supplied the reason for that. Doubtless Petal was filled with her current fears over their plan, but she would be sorted out soon enough. Provided, of course, that the answer to their request was positive.

This thought spiraled Teacup's mind into the alternative, that they would be turned down. Then, her only hope would lay in convincing Petal to erase her memories of Earth anyway, and she worried that this would be an arduous, even impossible task. Petal had become so stubborn of late.

Teacup thought back to her life on the farm. She thought of Cornflower and Durum. It would be harvest in just under a month, and the Provenders had no help. Probably they would have to hire somepony to bring in the harvest, and that would mean fewer bits for the next year. Teacup had to get all of this memory stuff over and done with, so that she could head back home as quickly as possible. That way she could be there for them. Then, everything would be as it had always been.

Except that this time, she wouldn't become moody and sad because of an errant remembrance. She wouldn't have any 'moments' where she gave Missus Provender cause to fuss. She would finally be a happy, well-adjusted pony, just like any natural-born Equestrian.

Provided the answer was a yes. It had to be yes. It just had to be.

Her stomach gave up. She could not eat anything. She was just too worried.

Teacup and Petal had several hours to kill before noon, when they had been told that they could return to the library, and find out whether or not Celestia approved of their wish. Not knowing what else to do, they wandered the town. They spent some time in one store, looking at comfortable sofas and a long case full of writing quills, not really interested in either, just trying to keep busy. They found little amusement in a joke and party supplies shop. Even a store entirely devoted to fans failed to interest them, though Petal did show curiosity about what was used to power them.

The weight of what answer they would receive hung over them.

Petal had been unusually quiet throughout the morning, her statements simple and always about anything save the subject at hoof. Teacup had expected her to go on at some length about all of her issues, but she had said nothing on the subject. Teacup was both grateful, and unnerved by this. At last, she could take it no longer.

"Petal, aren't you going to say something?"

"I've been talking a lot! Remember all the questions I had for Mr. Breezy? I thought I'd been pretty talkative." They were now at the outskirts of town, where endless apple orchards grew, and had turned around to head towards the library. It would be midday very soon.

"No, I mean about the whole reason we are here! About what Twilight will say!"

"I really don't have anything to say about that, Teacup. I just don't. At this point, what happens, happens. It's out of my hooves." Petal's head drooped a bit as she ambled along beside Teacup.

"What, no more doubts, no more worries?" asked Teacup.

"I have plenty of both, I just have nothing more to say." Petal looked up at her friend "What do you want me to say? Would anything I might say make any difference?"

Teacup frowned a little bit "No, I suppose not. Sorry, Petal."

"We'll find out what is what soon enough. All I will say is this: I want you to be happy, Teacup. That's all I have ever wanted since we began this trip. I just want you to be happy." Petal's eyes had a way of looking both caring and sad at the same time.

"I know. I do know that, Petal." Teacup gave Petal a little nuzzle as they walked "You've only ever tried to be a good friend."

The two mares walked on in silence. The sun rose higher as they made the center of town, and the noon bell rang just as they reached the grounds of the library. Petal nosed the door open, and held it for Teacup, a friendly gesture. Teacup entered. Inside the library was cool and shade and shelves and the scent of wood, and also the ancient dust of countless books.

"You're very prompt. I commend you, my little ponies." The voice was melodious and regal. It was a voice that Petal recognized instantly, from countless newsfeeds and press conferences. Teacup had never heard the voice before, but something in it made her legs weak. This not the voice of an ordinary pony, rather it carried some strange, soft power that not so much spoke, as commanded.

The voice had come from an extraordinarily tall creature, of exceptional beauty. She was an alicorn, possessed of all the traits of all three pony races, hooves, horn and wings. Her regal body was purest white, her crown gold, as were the elaborate claddings over her hooves. But what struck Teacup the most was the alicorn's mane and tail. Flowing like banners in an eternal wind, made not of hair but of the very stuff of magic, her mane and tail shimmered cerulean, heliotrope and ocean hues. The flowing curtain of light that was her mane, appeared like portals to an endless sky, and Teacup's eyes seemed to float off into them, into infinity as she stared.

Beyond thought, Teacup's equine body bowed low, and in her bones, beyond any doubt, she knew who the impossibly beautiful creature must be: she was Celestia herself, Princess of Equestria, living Goddess of the sun.

"Thank you, but I get quite enough of that really." Teacup dared to peek up from the floor, where she found herself, legs outstretched in supplication. "It's OK, get up!" The goddesses' voice was gentle, even jovial.

Teacup shivered. The statues, the things Petal had said. Fear hit her like a wall.

"No, really, get up. It's difficult to carry on a conversation like that." Celestia sounded almost as if she were teasing. Teacup heard what must be Twilight Sparkle giggle: "Come on, Teacup, the Princess won't bite."

"Well, I might." Celestia said with a sly smile "If I get too hungry. Tell me about yourself, Teacup. Join us for lunch."

Teacup raised her head and saw that a table had been set up, with various foods and comfortable hoofstools to sit on. She had been so awed upon entering that the rest of the room had not registered to her vision. Twilight and Spike were seated on the other side of the table, and Teacup only now realized that Celestia had been sitting at the head of the table, a cup floating in front of her.

Teacup saw Petal, already standing, waiting for her. Petal motioned with her head towards the table.

Celestia proved a congenial monarch, friendly, almost mischievous at times, and somehow vaguely sad, too. But she was not the tyrant that Teacup had expected, and while she was not in any sense an ordinary pony - Teacup was not entirely sure Celestia was even made of flesh - nevertheless she was disarmingly pleasant to be around.

Teacup, over the meal, told her story, abbreviated greatly, and finished explaining, with some quaver in her voice, what it was she sought. Her memories of Earth were painful, and she just wanted to be purely Equestrian, to have her experience of Earth as extinguished as the Earth itself was.

The Princess listened attentively, waiting for Teacup to finish.

"When I first reached out my hoof to your world, I already understood the suffering there. My offer was always simple; join us and live in peace. If you are not at peace, then that offer has not been fulfilled. Twilight Sparkle!" Celestia turned to her student "I feel confident that you can handle this, so I ask you to help this pony. Please see that she is taken care of. Now I must go, for I have matters to attend to."

"Yes, Princess." Twilight bowed her head briefly, and Teacup felt compelled to do the same. So, apparently, did Petal.

"One thing, though." The solar goddess turned her head back as she was leaving "Do nothing until tomorrow. Be advised, Teacup, that once done, this cannot be reversed. Take some time to think about it."

With that, the ruler of all Equestria, left the library.

Sitting on her padded hoofstool, Teacup was flabbergasted. If she had known it would be that easy, she would have gone straight to Canterlot from the very beginning.

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

Teacup found Petal outside, laying on the grass that surrounded the edges of the land the great library tree stood upon. Petal was lying on her back, legs up, looking at the light that filtered through the leaves above. She was almost grinning, and occasionally she waved a front leg at the high, vast treetop, as if she could ruffle the leaves there, or touch the clouds beyond with a hoof.

Teacup ambled over, folded her legs, and lay down a few feet from her friend. "Whatcha doin?"

"Marveling" came the answer.

"Marveling? At what?" Teacup rolled onto her side and twisted her head in the grass, trying to see whatever it was that Petal was seeing.

"Look, Teacup, at the leaves. The light sparkling through them. You can stare right at the sun and it won't hurt your eyes. It won't blind you. See the breeze, moving the branches? That's deliberate. Pegasai choose days for light breezes, and move the clouds to make that happen. It's all so amazing. It's just... a miracle."

Teacup rolled all the way over onto her own back, her legs up. She watched the leaves and the sparkling brightness, dared to stare directly at the sun, and was happy to realize that unlike Earth's sun, her eyes would never be destroyed by such brilliance. Teacup felt the faint breeze, and sniffed the air, so full of the perfume of flowers, and the sweet scent of the grass.

"It is amazing. It's like a dream. Like an impossible dream." Teacup turned her head enough to see Petal with one of her eyes "All the time on the farm I felt that. I'd feed the chickens, and just be amazed.. 'I'm feeding chickens!' Perfect, beautiful, storybook chickens. And they were glad to see me, too."

"Concentrate on that feeling, Teacup. Commit it to your very soul, if you can. Feel that wonder as strongly as you can. Please, do that for me, will you Teacup?" Petal sounded strangely sad.

"I do, Petal, almost every day. Can't really help it, everything in Equestria is so amazing."

Petal rolled over onto her stomach, and stared intently at Teacup. After a long moment she finally spoke. "It won't be. Not after tomorrow. Nothing in Equestria will be amazing anymore. Not one thing."

Petal got up, and walked off.

Teacup watched her go, until following her further would require rolling over again. It wasn't worth it; the grass was so soft and cool. She looked back up instead, at the light still shining through the library tree's canopy. The slight movement of the leaves in the breeze made the sky sparkle, and Teacup felt drowsy and content. Her worries were over. She had won. Tomorrow, she would be free. No more pain, no more nightmares of slums and violence. No more lifelong wounds torturing her heart.

What had Petal meant by her strange words? Nothing would be amazing anymore? That was ridiculous. Equestria was amazement itself. There wasn't anything in Equestria that wasn't amazing. Even the hay was amazing. The very soil was amazing; it smelled clean and rich and good, without a trace of oil or heavy metals or anything bad. Teacup was constantly astonished that every pony didn't just go around staring at everything all the time!

She sure had, when she first arrived.

When she had first looked, really looked, at Missus Provender's kitchen when she was waking after her Conversion, Teacup recalled being astonished by the wood on the floor. She was lying flat on one of those cheap Bureau blankets, but her head was right on the floor, and the floor was all wood. Wood! Only the very wealthiest had access to wood, since the forests had died. The ultimate luxury, and she was laying on an unimaginable fortune of the stuff. The whole kitchen was wood, as was the entire house. It smelled so good. She remembered how good it smelled to her.

Everything in Equestria was made of wonders. That was just how the place was. That was why she had never even thought of leaving the farm in all of those ten years. The farm was so beautiful! Of course, now that she had lived in Hoofington, she had some idea of how much excitement and fun existed out in the world. Hoofington had been the most fun she had ever had in her life, there with Petal, enjoying the big city. Compared to that, the farm was....

Teacup blinked. Somehow, she felt disturbed, now. She couldn't figure out why, but somehow she felt sad... no, not exactly sad, but... uncomfortable. That was new. This line of thinking wasn't making her happy.

Teacup rolled onto her belly and struggled to her hooves. Enough of that. Petal must have messed with her mind, somehow. Maybe a treat, something sweet would help. Teacup set off for the local bakery. Lunch had been fine, but that was a while ago, now. Maybe a cupcake or something would cheer her up. After all, she had won!

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

The pathways that ran through Ponyville rambled between the thatched houses and more elaborate shops, sometimes crossing waterways with little stone bridges. Everywhere were comfortable benches to sit upon or stretch out on. Little gardens of flowers forced the paths to flow around them like rivers, and wide, grassy spaces made the entire town a lovely green park.

Teacup sat on a bench by one of the wide grassy spaces. Fillies and colts ran and laughed, chasing a colorful ball around the turf.

Teacup slumped over on the bench, her front hooves lightly touching the soil, her head down. She intently studied the pathway, noting the subtle shades of the dirt, and the tiny, lightly hued chips of rock that were embedded within it. Some of the gravel in the path were small fragments of gemstones, she noted. Little bits of ruby, emerald, and sapphire lightly lay scattered like sand. Teacup idly dug at them with the tip of her hoof, watching the miniscule fragments sparkle. Gemstones in the dirt! Equestria could never, ever cease astonishing her.

"Hello! Are you alright?" The voice was kindly, more curious than overly concerned.

Teacup raised herself up to find a chestnut mare with a bright yellow mane. The mare wore glasses. Beside her was a tiny filly with wide eyes, perhaps not that much more than a year old - which for Equestrians meant that she could already run and talk, but had no schooling. The filly hid behind her mother's back leg, covering herself in her mother's tail. She peeked out at Teacup occasionally, before vanishing back into bright yellow security.

"Oh! Hello! I was just looking at the little gems in the dirt. Did you know there are rubies in the dirt?"

"Rubies, emeralds, none of them are big enough to use for anything though." The chestnut mare was not impressed "If you want to decorate stuff, you need to go out where the big rocks grow, in the Dragon Mountains. You'll never find anything interesting here."

"Oh...um... my name is Teacup. I'm from South Withers. Howdy do?"

"Banana." The mare waved a hoof idly at herself. "Banana Acres. I run the banana plantation, over on the other side of Canterlot. This is my daughter, Plantain. Say hello, sweetie!"

The shy little filly peeked out through curls of her mother's tail "Hello." Almost instantly her head drew back, closing the curls like a curtain on a stage.

"A banana plantation? In Equestria?" Teacup was astonished.

"Well.... of course. Everypony loves bananas. You can't have banana muffins without them. Or banana splits, or banana pudding, or... just bananas. Ponies are bananas for bananas!" Ms. Acres was taken aback by Teacup's reaction of surprise.

"But... the climate..." Teacup foundered in the field of conversation.

"We have a deal with the pegasai. Constant sunshine, and we skip spring, winter and fall entirely. It's less work for them, and more bananas for everyone. It's kind of dull, though, summer forever. Still, that's why we have hooves, right? I want little Plantain to see other seasons as she grows up. This will be her first Fall. I just love the Running Of The Leaves." Ms. Acres turned slightly to nuzzle her foal, but Plantain had other ideas, and retreated, following the sweep of Banana's tail. The chestnut mare laughed at this. "She's a little shy around other ponies. She prefers her bunnies and those... spiders."

"Spiders?" This was new. Teacup was aghast.

"Giant banana spiders. They live all over the plantation. They used to like to jump out of the trees and scare everypony. They thought it was funny. We had to make an agreement with them, so once a month we hold a banana picnic for the spiders and that solved the problem. But oh, Celestia, is it boring. Have you ever been to a social event with spiders? It's 'click-click-click', and you can't understand a thing they say. Plus, let's face it, they are pretty creepy. And the clicking - it's like listening to a room of bored ponies tapping their hooves while they wait. At least they're polite."

Teacup moved from being aghast to the more sensible position of wide-mouthed horror "Aren't... aren't they poisonous?" she squeeked.

"Huh? Nothing in Equestria is poisonous. Everyone knows that." Banana Acres looked at Teacup as if she were a bit... slow. "Anyway it's the bunnies that are the real problem."

"B-Bunnies?" By this time Teacup's mind had simply chosen to give up, and she found herself floating along, down the long river of incredulity.

"Plantain has gotten them organized them into some kind of a marching band. Up and down, back and forth, hundreds of them, all in formation. That's her big plan in life. She thinks she's going to start the first rabbit symphony or something. It's not like any of them can play an instrument, they're just bunnies. She'll never amount to anything marching bunnies around." Ms. Acres seemed frustrated. "Run along honey!" she scooted her daughter out to the green field. "Mommy will wait right here on the bench. Go play for awhile. Go on!"

Ms. Acres continued "I want her to go to the big city someday. Not get stuck on the plantation like me. I can't tell you how dull my life is. Bananas. Oh, look, more bananas. I'm actually sick of bananas now - can you believe that? Anyway, I really want her to get serious about studying, so she can have an exciting life. But no, all she wants is to play with dancing bunnies. Did I mention she has them dancing, too? They're not very good, actually. Bunnies just aren't built to do a decent cabriole, and it's all feet over ears the moment they try a tours chaînés déboulés. Pathetic, really."

"I... I have to go." Teacup struggled to her hooves. "It was very nice to meet you. Um... bye." Teacup tried not to gallop, but she could not help herself.

"Curious mare. Oh well. PLANTAIN!" Ms. Acres yelled out to her foal, who was hiding behind a bush. "MINGLE! I didn't bring you all the way to Ponyville so you could hide out!"

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

The moon was high in the night sky. Teacup wandered down the center of Ponyville, towards the bridge that led to the town pavilion. She had been wandering all day long, stopping only to rest, or to have a snack. She hadn't felt like eating a full dinner.

She had made a point of avoiding Petal. Right now, that unicorn just seemed to fill her with uncertainty. She felt angry at Petal, though she wasn't entirely sure why. Everything had seemed so simple, months ago, when they had first started out. And Hoofington. Oh, Hoofington had been so wonderful. Then everything just seemed to go wrong, somehow.

Petal's words, those damn words, kept echoing in Teacup's mind. "Nothing in Equestria will be amazing anymore. Not one thing." It was a stupid thing to say. Just today, Teacup had sat with a pony that grew bananas in a patch of perpetual summer, and whose year-old foal marched dancing rabbits around. They had a peace agreement with giant spiders. The hell? Equestria could not be more amazing if it tried to be.

She'd met a living goddess this very same day! Can't forget that, she thought. A living goddess, banana spiders, dancing bunnies, all on the same day. That was just one day. And on top of all of that, the day was perfect, absolutely perfect weather, sweet green grass and flowers everywhere.

Try having a day like that in Wilmington! Hell, try having a day like that anywhere at all on the long dead Earth! You could probably get the spiders, but they wouldn't be agreeable, and the grass, sky and bunnies were right out. Plus, of course, bananas had been extinct for decades before Teacup had been born.

Equestria was the most amazing of amazing places. There was no comparison.

No comparison at all.

11. The Family Name

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Lost In The Herd: Four

Teacup
Down On The
Farm

By Chatoyance

Chapter Eleven: The Family Name

"Ah, Excuse me...Howdy there, ma'am?" The face was blurry and far too cheerful for how Teacup felt. Also the hoof shaking her awake was none too gentle. "Ah don't want to pry into yur business or nothin', but it's a mighty cold mornin', what with fall comin' on an' all, to be sleepin' on the ground like that. Now ah don't mind none, or nothing, but I'm a might worried that you might, well, be in some kind of distress an' all, what with sleepin' out here and such."

Teacup shivered. She was very cold, and her joints ached from sleeping on the ground. She tried to remember what the heck she was doing there. Gradually, her foggy memory cleared, and she remembered having wandered out to the edge of town, because she didn't want to face Petal. She hadn't wanted to return to their shared room. Somehow she had thought it was a good idea to curl up under an apple tree. After all, the day had been perfect.

Oh, yes... the Running Of The Leaves was coming up. The leaves had to be turned to autumn colors for that, and this required the pegasai to adjust the temperature at night so that the leaves would change. Teacup had been so preoccupied that she had forgotten about that. No wonder she felt so frosty.

"Ah, ma'am?"

"Teacup. My name's Tea..cup." She was still waking up, even if her mind was clearing, and her mouth felt like several raccoons had made an outhouse in it during the night.

"Well, beggin' yur pardon and such, I was wondrin' if maybe you might be hungry. We're fixin' to make some breakfast back at the farmhouse, and you'd be welcome to join us, if you'd like."

The pony was athletic for a mare, orange with a soft yellow mane and tail. Her mane was tied in the pony equivalent of pigtails, and had fixed her tail that way as well, so as to keep both from interfering with her work. She wore a wide-brimmed hat, and a friendly face. "Name's Applejack, this here's my farm. We grow apples, family business'n all. Glad to meet ya, Teacup."

"Um..." Teacup was having some trouble getting to her hooves; she was sore and stiff, and had just come to the conclusion that anything was almost certainly preferable to sleeping on the ground. There was also no denying that she was hungry; her stomach was making sounds like two Everfree monsters disagreeing over a potential mate.

Suddenly, she knew what she wanted to eat. She knew exactly what she wanted. And she wanted it a lot.

"Ms... Applejack?" Teacup was now fully upright, and much more awake "I'd love to take you up on your offer of breakfast! I live on a farm myself, down by South Withers, and I haven't had a good, down home breakfast in months."

"Well, shucks, we can take care of that! Withers? You're a long way from home, if'n you don't mind me sayin'." The two had begun to walk, Applejack leading the way through the orchard to the big red farmhouse just ahead.

"I've been on a long journey." Teacup was limping a little, but her joints were slowly warming up "Listen Applejack, I've got a really strong desire for a taste of my home. Back on my farm, we always ate biscuits and tea for breakfast, and our biscuits were special. They won a blue ribbon and everything. Could I make you an offer? If you'd let me use your kitchen, I would like to whip up a batch of those biscuits for you and yours. Do you think that might be possible?"

"You want to make us all biscuits for breakfast? Well, that's very kind o' ya, an' it'll save Big Mac and me a peck o' work, so sure, if'n that's what ya' really want to do. Can't hardly say no!"

The rambling farmhouse was big and roomy, and if not in the most perfect repair, had the warm, homey feeling of a place that had been truly loved. After being introduced to Applejack's elderly Granny Smith, and the appropriately named Big Mac, Teacup was led to the the kitchen. There, Applejack assisted her by bringing forth the needed ingredients and tools, and Teacup set about making Missus Provender's Prize Winning Biscuits for the small family.

As she stirred the bowl, a long wooden spoon in her teeth, Teacup's memory slipped back to her happy days on the Provender Farm, and she couldn't help a tear forming in her eye. "Somethin' wrong? Kin ah help?" Applejack had seen the tear fall into the batter.

"No, sorry." Teacup sniffed and smiled "Just remembering home. Your place reminds me of my farm, and I miss it a lot."

"Ah reckon' ah kin understand that perfectly. Ah always feel th' same, when I'm away from home myself." The orange farm pony stood close to Teacup, always ready to help with an ingredient, but mostly just to be friendly. Applejack reckoned that the poor white mare likely hadn't enough bits to afford a room, and being down on her luck, had been forced to sleep on the ground.

When the first batch was in the oven, Applejack set about the issue of tea. She had to dig around in the larder a bit, until she found the tea jar she knew was back there somewhere. "We don't drink a lot'a tea, ta' tell the truth, but there ain't no reason why we can't today. Ah don't know how good this here is, but it's tea, and it's what we got."

"I'm sure it will be wonderful." Teacup really liked her hostess, and was glad she had been discovered by her.

Soon, Teacup was bringing the tray of biscuits out of the oven, and the warm smell set everypony's mouth to watering. Nothing smelled as good as Provender Biscuits in the morning, Teacup thought, and she was happy to share this joy with her new farm friends.

Sitting down in the kitchen, at an old wood table, Granny Smith gummed her biscuit with approval, and the muscular Big Mac wolfed several down at a time. Applejack, for her part, was not faint with praise: "I reckon these here are the best biscuits ah ever done ate." There was jam and butter on the table, and the sound of smacking lips all around.

It was decided early on that a second batch would be a good idea, so Teacup was already mixing it. "Hey there, Teacup, you ain't had any yurself! Ah got a cup of tea here for ya, why don't ya set a spell and have some o' yur own biscuits an' let me finish for ya?" Applejack had gotten up and ambled over to Teacup's side again.

The smell of the biscuits had driven Teacup half mad from hunger, but she was determined to be good to her hosts. "Just a moment" she mumbled through the spoon, as she finished her mixing. "Actually, I am famished. Thank you, Applejack!"

Teacup leaned over the table and took a biscuit. She moved it to a little plate by her, and as she set it down, she bit half of it away, the soft biscuit resting on her tongue. She leaned over and took a sip of tea, the biscuit melting into the warmness. The flavor and aroma of tea and freshly baked biscuit completely filled her senses.

Suddenly her memory returned to Provender Farm, and Missus Provender was smiling at her, and the chickens were perfect and beautiful, the straw was golden like lovely morning, and the floor smelled of healthy wood, of summers past, and flowers and hay and happy meals of good food and much laughter. Every little thing, every smell and taste and feeling, every butterfly hovering over the alfalfa was wonder and beauty and a true miracle, and each moment a treasure, because she alone knew just how impossible it was. With that taste, with that bite of biscuit, she knew down to the depth of her being that not even Hoofington could compare, because she already had an entire world to compare her farm, HER farm to, and she finally, fully understood Petal's words to her, and also how wise immortal Celestia must truly be to make her wait one full day.

There was a sound. It was like air filling an empty space, a swirling sort of sound, almost musical, punctuated by a tone so definite and final that it could not be questioned. Teacup's right flank tingled, as though an electrical current had passed through it.

Teacup's head shot up, her neck rigid, her legs wide. She turned her head to the right, seeing AppleJack's wide eyes and the look of surprise on her face. Teacup lowered her view as she craned her head and curved her flank, already somehow certain of what she would behold.

There, on Teacup's flank, shining in the morning light, was the image of a teacup and two biscuits, a trinity of symbols that somehow she instantly understood, for they followed the sudden realization of her heart. In that moment, she knew that her very soul had been saved by a bite and a sip, by knowing that the price of her heaven was the memory of a long lost hell.

Teacup started crying, large tears rolling down her smiling face, and Applejack was going on about how she had seen it appear, and how she hadn't noticed that Teacup was a 'blank flank' and that she was really sorry for saying 'blank flank' out loud and was Teacup alright because she was crying, and Teacup had to explain that it was because she was happy, and everything became confusing for a while, but it was good confusing, and that was OK, it was better than OK.

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

Petal walked nervously back and forth in front of the library. She kept scanning the roads, and the sides of the lot for any sign of Teacup. It was almost noon once again, and Teacup was very aware that Twilight had spent the night making sure she knew just the right spell and that it would remove exactly the right memories, while leaving everything else alone.

If this was truly what Teacup wanted, then Petal would accept it. Twilight had explained how the erasure would remove selectively any mention or suggestion of Earth from Teacup's memories, but that it would not eliminate anything that had happened to her since arriving in Equestria. Teacup would remember Petal, she would remember going on their journey, she would know that she had sought to have her memories erased, but she simply would not know what those memories were. Any conversation Petal had shared with Teacup would appear edited to her; Teacup would remember having talked with Petal, and any emotions she had felt, but all details about Earth would simply be missing.

This had comforted Petal somewhat, since she did fear losing her friendship with Teacup over this. But Twilight had assured her that even if Teacup would no longer remember every detail of their time together, any feelings of shared joy or gratitude or friendship would be untouched.

Petal was about to go back inside the library for a bit when she noticed a familiar white shape approaching. The violet mane was unmistakable; Teacup was coming. Petal's heart sank a bit, for she knew that it was too late, but she resolved to be the best friend she could be, whatever happened.

Teacup stopped a few feet from Petal, in profile, showing her left side. She seemed shy, somehow, and looked off to the edge of the library, never meeting Petal's eyes.

"Petal?" Teacup spoke, her head lowered, her eyes half-lidded, a faint smile playing on her lips. "Would you do me a favor?"

Petal didn't know what was going on, but whatever it was, she had already decided what her response would always be. "Of course, Teacup. What do you need me to do?"

"I need you to take me back home, so that every day can remain... amazing." Teacup turned to face the other way, deliberately showing off her new cutie mark, and Petal saw the teacup and the two biscuits, and tears filled her eyes. Somehow, Teacup had finally understood, and Petal was so grateful that there would be no memory erasure today, or ever.

Twilight was strangely disappointed; she had studied all night and now she wasn't going to get to perform any fascinating new magic. She left in a huff, intent on finding anypony that might have some memory, any memory that they wanted to lose, if she possibly could.

And thus it was that Petal found herself back on the road, headed towards Provender Farm, with her best friend Teacup.

The journey home was made much easier thanks to a word with the local weather pegasus; she turned out to be yet another of the original ambassadors to Earth, and Spike was able to convince her to put the word out that two travelers needed clear skies to get home. It helped to have friends in high places, it seemed, even in Equestria.

Petal and Teacup stopped only briefly in Hoofington, just long enough to refill their traveling supplies. Petal was surprised that Teacup did not want to take in a show or stay a week or two, but Teacup was adamant; the harvest was coming, and she needed to get home as quickly as possible so as to help the Provenders.

When they finally reached South Withers, most of the substantial number of bits they had made during their first time in Hoofington were finally gone, so they had a simple, inexpensive meal, and begged the Toffee twins to crash in their home for one night, until they could set out down the very last road on their return journey; the road that led to the Provender Farm.

The next morning, they found themselves on that road, heading home. In the distance ahead, vast fields of wheat and corn lead to a small but cozy farmhouse.

"Petal?" Teacup's eyes searched the familiar landscape "Do you think Missus Provender...." Teacup's voice trailed off, and her ears drooped low.

"Missus Provender...what, Teacup?"

"Do you think... she missed me?" Teacup looked genuinely concerned.

"Oh, Teacup. You silly filly! - of course she missed you! She loves you, Teacup. Goodness." Petal stared at Teacup. "What brought this on?"

"Well, I don't know... I guess it's just been so long, and really, I AM just some newfoal she took in to work on her farm, after all." Teacup's head hung even lower as she ambled.

"Teacup, you are my friend, but damn... sometimes you just aren't the most aware pony I've ever met. It's frustrating, to tell you the truth." Petal shook her head.

"I know." Teacup raised her head and sighed. "Thanks for putting up with me."

Petal sighed in return, and then gave her friend a soft, loving smile.

Provender Farm was the same as Teacup remembered it, save that now the crops were full and ready. Mister Provender was the first to greet them, and the old stallion held Teacup tightly under his neck for a long time, pulling her tight against his chest. Inside the kitchen was Missus Provender, who, for the first time that Teacup had even seen, actually wept.

When all the fuss and tears and laughter of their reunion had passed, after the big dinner that Missus Provender threw together to celebrate Teacup's return, and after all the fuss over Teacup's new cutie mark was done with, Teacup found herself alone at last with Missus Provender. Petal was asleep upstairs in Teacup's bed, they were used to sharing beds by now when it was required. Durum had retreated upstairs as well, knowing that Cornflower and Teacup needed some time together.

Missus Provender made tea, and there they were, in the night, at the same table where Teacup had first received her name.

"Did ya manage to find a fix to yer... problem?" Missus Provender poured tea for the two of them.

"I think, after a fashion, that I did." Teacup felt so many emotions she had no words for most of them "Cornflower..." It was not often that Teacup had ever used Missus Provender's first name out loud. "I want to tell you about it, if you're willing to listen."

"Great Celestia, Teacup! All I ever wanted is for ya to open up ta me! I've been worried sick about ya for a long time." It was a surprisingly open admission by the normally reserved Missus Provender, but the real weight behind her words was in her wet, shining eyes.

"I was... afraid." Teacup began to shake with emotion. "I was afraid that you wouldn't really want to hear, I was afraid that what I had to say would harm you somehow, I was afraid...because..." Teacup's tears fell onto the table "...in my heart, you are the mother I never had. I...I love you. I wish you were my mother. I would be so proud if you were. I am so grateful you took me in. I'm so grateful to have been allowed to stay here, to work here, for you to put up with me, and I just want to be here, on the farm, with you forever, I just, I just..." Teacup just couldn't speak any more.

"You jus' listen to me, Teacup..." Cornflower looked down at Teacup's new Mark "Teacup....Biscuit... Provender! I expect my fillies ta come an' talk ta me about anything, that's what I'm here for. Your sisters never gave me this kind 'a trouble, so I expect ya ta just stop that kind 'a nonsense from now on. Ya hear?"

'Teacup Biscuit Provender!' Teacup overflowed with emotion and she had barely enough strength left to put her head down on the table, sobbing from relief and joy. The tea spilled, but with all the tears, it didn't really matter. Cornflower laid her own head across Teacup's back, a mother's embrace, and nuzzled Teacup as though she were but a foal.

Once they leave the farm, really leave the farm, they don't come back - Cornflower recalled her own thoughts so long ago - except sometimes, Cornflower happily realized, except sometimes, when they do.

The End

The Lost In The Herd Series:
One: The Big Respawn,
Two: Euphrosyne Unchained,
Three: Letters From Home,
Four: Teacup, Down On The Farm

The Conversion Bureau Novels:
27 Ounces: A story of eight and one half ponies
The Taste Of Grass
The Conversion Bureau: Code Majeste
The Conversion Bureau: The 800 Year Promise
The Conversion Bureau: Going Pony
The Reasonably Adamant Down With Celestia Newfoal Society!
Recombinant 63: A Conversion Bureau Story
HUMAN in Equestria: A Conversion Bureau Story
The PER: Michelson and Morely
Little Blue Cat
Cross The Amazon
Adrift Off Fiddler's Green: The Final Conversion Bureau Story

The Short Stories:
Her Last Possession
The Conversion Bureau: PER Equitum
The Conversion Bureau: Brand New Universe
Tales Of Los Pegasus
The Poly Little Pony


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Optimalverse Works:
Friendship Is Optimal: Caelum Est Conterrens
Leftovers: A Friendship Is Optimal Story
IMPLACABLE
My Life In Fimbria

Injectorverse Works:
I.D. - That Indestructible Something

The More Conventional Fanfics:
The Ice Cream Pony Summer
Around The Bend

PRIDE related works:
Transspecieality


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