Spike's Hearth's Warming List
“Spike's Hearth's Warming List”
By Breeziebee
Dear Santa Hooves,
This year my Hearth’s Warming list is kinda small. Well, my letter isn’t, but that’s because, you know, I need to explain why it’s so weird this year. And besides, I’m sure it’s not often that you get letters explaining why we want what we want, especially one with good reason.
My Hearth’s Warming list started like any other; window shopping in Canterlot. Oh, Santa, have you ever been? It’s like Hearth's Warming LAND this time of year! And what with the annual Hearth's Warming Lights competition, EVERYPONY's house is a light show. I saw a fifteen foot glowing snowflake roped up on somepony's roof that made me worried for you. If you tried landing on that rooftop, let me tell you, there'd be only one survivor between you and the snowflake. You might want to leave their presents at the door. Speaking of presents...
It's the best time of the year to shop. The crowds are huge, but the shops have the most super fantastic stuff ever, and the window displays are all souped up for Hearth's Warming, with fake snow and lights, the latest toys and baked goods and holiday sweaters and everything! So I was on my usual window shopping spree, you know, to get inspiration for my Hearth’s Warming list. It was cold, even for a Dragon like me, so I had on that coat my sweet Rarity gave me for last year's Hearth's Warming <3 (By the way, Santa, I know it's probably hard to gift wrap an entire pony, but last year you got Twilight that mountain-sized telescope and that's six times the size of Rarity, so what's with ignoring that part of my list?)
Everypony else was really bundled up too, which made it ten times harder, moving through a crowd of puffy marshmallow coats and mile-long scarves. So things were going slow, you know? I was in Equine Toys. If it wasn't bad enough that the entire store was 20% off, today, "Santa Hooves" was coming to town. I hate fakers. Somepony in a fat suit and a fake beard, sitting on a throne they’re unworthy of. Fillies and colts were all lined up with their parents. The way it works is, the ponies climb up on Santa Hooves' lap, and he asks them what they want for Hearth's Warming. They give him a picture they colored of the present they want most, and he gives it to an elf pony, who gives it right back to the parents so they can turn around and buy whatever it is their kid wants from the store, and while they’re at it snatch those nostalgia toys they saw earlier, you know? Stupid stuff, just for promoting business, that’s all. I was in line, though. I wasn't, you know, excited or anything. I just kind of wanted to get my picture with the fake Santa Hooves. I mean, it's not like I'm ever going to get one with you, so...
Well the line was enormous, let me tell you. I'd been waiting for hours, I swear, when somepony caught my attention.
"Spike!" She was bouncing happily, ringing the little jingle bell on the top of the Hearth’s Warming elf hat that covered her blonde mane. It was Dinky Hooves. I’m no sap, but everypony loves Dinky. She's the happiest, friendliest silly filly you'll ever meet.
"Oh, hey, Dinky!"
"Spike, are you here to see Santa, too?"
"What, who? Me?" I mean, she made it sound like I was here to sit on his lap. That just wasn't happening.
"Yes you, Silly! I don't know anypony else named Spike!" She was still bouncing.
"Well, I just, uhh..." I was looking around at all the snowflake cutouts hanging from the ceiling. My face was hot, but I wasn't embarrassed or anything, so there's no way I was blushing. "I'm here to ask Santa what all the cool colts are asking for. You know, so that I don't have to do much window shopping for my Hearth’s Warming list."
"Ohhhhhhhh! Your Hearth’s Warming list! Can I see? Can I help?" She nuzzled the pad of paper in my hand.
"Nah, you'd better go get back in line."
"Oh, it's okay. Mom is holding my spot so I could go to the bathroom!"
"Then go to the bathroom." I love Dinky, it's just, other ponies were around, and I've got a reputation to uphold, being Twilight's royal assistant and all.
"I already did! I was coming back when I saw you. So can I see?" I handed her the pad. Just to make the kid happy and stuff. "Ooooh. You've got a lots of things on your list."
"Yeah, well. I'm just giving Santa Hooves a bit of room. So if he can't get to a Snowy Slidy Super Sled, he can shoot for the new Doctor Whooves Hearth's Warming collection DVD. I'm just being considerate. I don't mind if he gets everything, though."
"Ooh, wow! Spike, you’re so smart!" She kept on flipping through the pages with delight and excitement at my excellent taste.
"Thanks, Dinky. I am Twilight Sparkle’s assistant, after all...” I made sure to keep an eye out for Rarity... dear Luna, if she saw me there, she might get the wrong idea.
"Well, the line’s moving speedy fast so I should go back. I don't want to keep Santa waiting." She turned to go, but stopped. "Hey, you're pretty far away! Wanna cut in with me and mom?"
"Oh boy, do I!" Twilight would have been mad at me for that. But I just wanted to get it over with. Please don’t put me on your naughty list, Santa.
We found Derpy just a few spots away from the front of the line. "Oh! Hi, Spike!" She smiled, just as happy to see me as Dinky was.
"Hi, Derpy! How's it going?"
"Oh, just great! We've been waiting a while, but Dinky is so excited I haven't noticed much."
"Aw. Say, Dinky, what's on your list, anyway?"
"Not telling!"
I turned to Derpy, but she shook her head. "She hasn't told me either!"
"It won’t work if I tell everypony."
"Dinky, that's for wishes, not Hearth's Warming lists." I chuckled. Silly filly. But I suppose I'm an exceptional expert on these things.
"I know that, silly.” She said with indignation. “If I didn’t, why would I ask to see yours?" She laughed. "For your information this is a wish, not a Hearth’s Warming list.”
"Oh?" Derpy smiled. "Well, I'm sure Santa will work very hard to make it come true!" She winked. When we reached the front of the line, I went ahead and let Dinky go first. She was so excited that she was shaking the floor with all that bouncing. And Derpy didn't do anything about it, because she was just as excited!
Dinky was bouncing all the way up the velvet carpet to Santa’s chair, the jingle bell on her hat ringing with each step. Santa Hooves smiled through his polyester beard. He reached for her as she climbed up the chair, and said loudly enough for everypony to hear,
“Well, what can Santa Hooves get you for Hearth’s Warming, little filly?”
Dinky snuggled into his fake beard, and handed him a folded piece of paper. But when she opened up the picture, he didn't look so jolly anymore. For Celestia's sake, isn't that what they pay him to do? He just looked sad. It was so wrong to see sadness on a Santa face--even a fake one. He and Dinky whispered for a while, and then the fake Santa Hooves... He gave her a hug. While they took their picture and Dinky collected her complimentary candy-stuffed stocking, a very grumpy elf discreetly delivered Dinky's picture to her mom. I wouldn't have rubbernecked while she opened it if I'd known what was inside. I feel so bad, but...
"Oh... Dinky..." Derpy, happy-go-lucky Derpy, sounded sad. I'd never heard her sound sad before. It would have been surprising in any other situation, but, standing in the middle of a toy store with all the presents in Equestria to offer, looking over Derpy’s shoulder at Dinky’s one Hearth' Warming wish, I felt sad, too. I didn't know what to say. Derpy folded up the paper and placed it in her saddlebags, then turned to me. "Please don't let her know we saw, Spike. It's our secret." She smiled, despite the sadness in her eyes. "Thank you for being such a good friend to my filly."
"You're... welcome, Derpy."
When I got home, those words sounded so insincere. Anypony else would have said, 'Oh, it's nothing. Dinky is special to me!' I don't know why I didn't say more. I’m sorry I didn’t. But I'm not writing this because I feel guilty, Santa. I'm writing this because Dinky deserves to have her Hearth's Warming wish. She deserves it more than anypony else. If you forgot about everypony's Hearth's Warming list but Dinky's, it would still be your best work yet. Please, Santa... I know you might not have control over these things, but maybe you know somepony who does? Please try. For me, for Derpy, and for Dinky. I don't need presents. I mean, I'll be getting plenty from Twilight anyway, right? So... Santa Hooves, what I want for Hearth’s Warming is a dad for Dinky. She'll never have her own dad back, but Dinky and Derpy both deserve somepony. If there's anypony that deserves them, just toss them under their tree, got it?
Happy Hearth's Warming, Santa. Stay warm and jolly.
Sincerely,
- Spike