> A Gilda'd Opportunity
>  by Ludicrous Lycan
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

> Four Hooves and Clueless
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


Four Hooves and Clueless



Gilda slammed the door to Sugarcube Corner as she stormed onto the street and away from the ponies inside. Her claws positively tore up the dirt path of the lousy backwater town on her way out.

Rainbow Dash’s voice followed from back in the bakery saying, “Not. Cool.”

Gilda almost tripped at hearing it. She snarled, seething in anger, and nearly turned around to go back inside to give her traitor of a former friend a reality check. Instead, she leaped into the sky in one smooth motion. Right away her wings tilted and she began to race towards the edge of town to get away. Annoyingly enough, the initial direction she headed was that of Dash’s cloud home. 

Gilda’s face screwed up in frustration when she realized her heading, and swiftly banked off in the near opposite direction. The Everfree Forest stretched out on the horizon in her new view. 

Gilda landed just outside the long dark tree line. She began to pace back and forth while replaying what had just happened in her mind. Stupid pink fuzz-wad! Dumb Dash! Lame ponies everywhere! With talons balled into fists, she slammed again and again on the ground. Despite this, she couldn’t stem her anger. Her head whipped towards the forest and scanned the outskirts for something, anything she could get her claws on or rip apart. 

Her eyes landed on a bed of blue flowers. Rainbow Dash’s last words played through her mind. Not. Cool. The familiar color of the stupid flowers almost seemed to laugh at her.

“Not cool!?” Gilda screamed at the flowers as she approached them. “I’ll show you who’s ‘not cool’!” She curled one of her talons into a tight fist and pounded a single flower—an infuriating match to Rainbow Dash's coat—into the ground.

When she pulled her fist away, the flower was a smashed heap. At first, she smirked in satisfaction. She looked over her claw and found some of the flower's blue pollen, annoyingly powdering it. 

“Oh! You… you flip flop!” Gilda snarled as before, then dove upon the flower bed and began thrashing at every blue flower in sight. She stomped, slashed, tore, and even chomped down on a few with her beak. When she was done, her anger now vented, the entire bed of flora was reduced to mulch. 

Gilda panted lightly as she made her way out of the carnage from her rage. “That will teach that lame Dash…” she muttered to herself. She surveyed herself briefly and found much more of the blue pollen was now coating her entirely. “Great… I'm gonna need a bath now. I hate those.” 

She heaved a heavy groan and stretched out her wings. A few powerful flaps sent her airborne and she made a beeline for the mountains. And from there, home. There was nothing left for her in Ponyville, and there was no point in staying.






One Year Later


Gilda sighed plaintively while her drooping eyes swept back and forth over the landscape. Her wings pumped slowly, more gliding than actively flying over the breezy, calm winds that prevailed throughout most of Equestria. Her homeland was far fiercer, wilder, and coming to Equestria was always calming; for other griffins that is, but not her. 

The surrounding foliage was green and Equestria was in the high point of spring. In the distance was Canterlot, and hanging in the sky beyond that lay Cloudsdale. Both were good signs that the town Gilda was looking for was somewhere near. She continued flying lazily, having been in the air for days on end over the last week; she was almost finished, though.

Minutes later, Gilda’s attention settled on a dark forest that stretched on for miles. Dipping, then banking along the side, she followed the tree line until it let out to a clearing with a dirt road. That was where she wanted to be, alright.

Her wing beats kicked up dirt just before she touched down onto the path. A sign on her right read: “Welcome to Ponyville.” Beyond that was the sight of numerous cottages with thatched roofs, indicative of the detestable village she was trying to reach.

“Finally,” she sighed in relief. 

Gilda was ready to lie down where she stood and pass out right there, but forced herself to continue on. I can't believe I'm doing this, I can't believe I'm this desperate... Her left front leg stepped forward, shivering with fatigue. She scowled down at her limbs for a moment, only to groan in frustration at the sight of them.

Shaking her head, Gilda forced herself into a painful trot into Ponyville. Before she even reached the edge she could see the hustle and bustle of dozens of townsponies going about their day.

Gilda groaned aloud, walking down the wide avenue. She began receiving a few curious sidelong looks from ponies she was passing. It was mid-afternoon and the town was certainly lively. Ponies were plentiful and cheery going about their day to day lives. It made sense then that she stood out like a sore claw amongst all of them.

“What the heck you think you’re lookin' at, hay brain!” Gilda roared at a couple of earth ponies that stared a bit too long for her taste. But, rather than roar, her voice broke slightly when she attempted to access a part of her that just wasn’t present. So, rather than an animalistic,  fear inducing shout, she sounded a bit like a singer who had choked on a high note. The ponies she yelled at scowled, then snickered at her respectively, smirking.

Gilda narrowed her eyes angrily, then grumbled to herself and just increased her pace. She trotted on, searching the town for the pony she was after. The tiredness was getting to her though; her head was sunk low to the ground in exhaustion, eyes barely wide enough to make out the pebbles in the road.

“Oof!” Still trotting tiredly along, barely paying attention to anything but her own depression, Gilda slammed into a stray pony. “Hey-!” she began but was cut off by the yellow pegasus that had gone into a string of apologies of her own.

“Oh my, I am so sorry about that!” Fluttershy squeaked loudly, then moved back behind her mane. “I guess I wasn’t watching where I was going. Oh dear.” She reappeared from inside her mane again, stretching out her neck. “Are you alright? Did I hurt you?” 

“Hurt me!?” Gilda blinked angrily at the mare, then after a moment just blinked tiredly. “I-I’m fine…” she lied, swaying slightly where she stood.

“Oh dear, are you sure?” Fluttershy was now staring wide eyed at Gilda, much to her discomfort. “You really don’t look so good…” she said. Her head tilted to the side thoughtfully, then. “Have we met? I’m sure I’ve seen you somewhere before.”

Gilda grimaced, recalling her last run in with Fluttershy after some effort. “Uhh... nope,” she lied again. She gave an idea some thought, then decided to roll with her apparent anonymity. “Anyway, I just flew into town, and boy are my wings tired… I’m looking for a friend of mine. Rainbow Dash?” She picked her head up a little, but couldn’t manage an easy smile; she was too tired, too angry.

“You're Dash’s friend too?” Fluttershy smiled a little and relaxed, probably at the discovery of common ground. “Well, I think she’s home right now, unless she’s practicing. The weather’s nice today, so I doubt she’s working. That is, unless she’s napping through her shift.”

Fluttershy began tittering to herself, a hoof covering her muzzle, while Gilda tried to hide her own annoyed eye twitch. 

Fluttershy looked up again. “You see, that’s a joke, because Rainbow likes to sleep so much. Oh, but don’t misunderstand! I don’t mean to say anything mean. She's a very hard worker and really appreciates good jokes. Actually, I’ve been practici-”

Gilda groaned loudly and began to push past Fluttershy, except the mare stepped back in front of her.

“Oh, wait! Uhm…” Fluttershy sheepishly looked around a moment before speaking up again. “Would you like something to eat? It’s the least I can do after bumping into you like that. You look awfully hungry is all, not to say you look skinny, I mean, I think you look very fit. O-Oh that is to say, uhm… Pinkie should be-”

“No!” Gilda had been calm, mostly from sheer tiredness, but yelled at the first mention of… of Pinkie Pie. 

Fluttershy shrank back in shock, causing Gilda to recoil somewhat herself. She gritted her teeth and looked away. “I mean, no, it’s fine. I just need to see Dash as soon as possible.”

Fluttershy didn’t return eye contact and only stared off to the side. “Okay...” she squeaked timidly.

Gilda looked up. She was surprised to see the disapproving glares of several other ponies around her. “Geez…” she groaned and shook her head, then looked at Fluttershy again. “Look, umm…?”

“Fluttershy,” Fluttershy choked out, one eye glancing at Gilda from behind her mane.

“Yeah… Look, Fluttershy, I just had a long flight here from the griffin kingdom. Several days, in fact...” She muttered the last part, eyes looking anywhere but at the other mare facing her. “So... sorry for yelling at you…” She had gritted her teeth, nearly mumbling the whole apology. 

Fluttershy stood up and looked Gilda in the face, wearing a renewed friendly smile. “Oh, it’s okay, I was probably being awkward… But, yes, I-I’ll go now.” With that, she cantered off, briefly glancing over shoulder just once.

The surrounding ponies also moved on. 

Eventually, Gilda realized she’d just been standing there, staring in an exhausted daze. “Uggh.” She started moving again and fought to stay awake, pressing through town towards Rainbow Dash’s house, where she hoped to find her old, former friend. This time, she also tried to take care to look out for pony road blocks.

The trot was barely worth mention compared to the flight Gilda had made from her home in the griffin kingdom, but still felt like it took a lifetime in her current state. Eventually, she found herself in a wide, peaceful looking field of grass, above which hovered her goal. 

Rainbow Dash’s cloud home floated just overhead.

Gilda had to summon all of her remaining strength for the fifteen or so strides between her and the front door. But she made it, and heaved out a breath after touching her hooves down on the soft terrace of Dash's cloud-porch. Her side leaned against the frame a moment, just to work out one last yawn. With a hoof she rapped against the door several times, eliciting a call from inside. 

“What the- Yeah, okay, be there in a sec! Hold your ponies, would you!” Rainbow Dash's unmistakable voice called from inside the cloud door.

Finally… Might get some… help… now… Gilda stood there, leaning against the door in a daze, and nearly drifted off to sleep. She wasn’t remotely prepared for the door to open, and fell in, almost on top of who was standing just inside the doorway.

“Hey!” Rainbow Dash yelled as she leaped out of the way. “What's the big idea? And who the hay are you?” She stared down at the lump of pony, now laying in her house and… snoring, it sounded like. The stranger had an odd coat; brown from the shoulders back, but bright white above that. She'd never seen such a weirdly patterned coat like that before.

On the floor, Gilda mumbled something unintelligible in answer as she laid there, sprawled out. “Oumf oh uu aye mmm.”

Rainbow Dash stared a moment longer, then cocked her head to the side quizzically. “What?” was all she managed.

Gilda heaved a heavy sigh into the clouded floor before lifting her head to the pony before her. “You know who I am.” Her voice was completely flat.

Rainbow Dash eyed the mare on her floor for a few more seconds. Oddly enough, she felt that the stranger was familiar, but couldn’t quite make out a name. "Uuuh, are you somepony from Cloudsdale...?"

“Of course you wouldn’t recognize me... I’m a freaking pony now...” Gilda mumbled. “Think hard, hay-brain. Who do I sound like?” Finished, she slumped her head back onto the floor and released another heavy groan.

The outburst shook away any lingering confusion Rainbow Dash had, recognizing that tone of voice and many similar outbursts from the past. She looked over the brown pegasus, her white head, and the purple highlights in her white mane. 

Rainbow's gaze came to a halt on the strange mare's cutie mark of a griffin's head. “Gi-Gilda!?” she stammered. A look of disbelief spread over her face.

Gilda grunted again, and nodded.

"Pfft-ahahahaha!” Rainbow Dash opened her eyes wide, then collapsed onto the floor, suddenly laughing uncontrollably.

Gilda managed to twist her head to the side and scowl at her friend as she rolled about the floor, kicking her hooves in the air. “Laugh it up, Dash. It’s all your stupid pony magic’s fault.”

Hearing this, Rainbow Dash rolled back over and stood up, suppressing her uproarious laughter down to a chuckle. “I can't believe it's you! And hey, what is that supposed to mean?”

“That’s what I want to know!” Gilda growled from the ground. She made a strained attempt to get to her hooves, but only collapsed under her own weight. Her legs felt like lead weights from days without rest. “Oh, what's the use. You probably couldn’t help me either.”

Rainbow Dash shook the last of the giggles from her system and sat down next to her old flying friend. She wore a serious look and had a tone of voice to match. “Look, I know things didn’t end well the last time we saw each other, but I can still hear you out.” A grin crossed her muzzle. “For old time's sake.”

It may have been the total exhaustion, but Gilda was actually touched somewhat by her old friend’s words. “Seriously? Wow, uhh… Thanks..."

They stared at each other quietly for almost an entire minute before Gilda spoke up again.

“Hey, Dash?” Gilda began sheepishly.

“Yeah, Gilda?” Dash returned.

“Can I crash here for a while?” Gilda broke eye contact to look around the room, her cheeks flushed in embarrassment. “I kinda flew here all the way from home and well…”

“And…?” Rainbow Dash cocked an eyebrow.

Gilda laid her head down against the cushy floor. “I can’t move.” She closed her eyes, and before Dash could object, was out cold.

Rainbow Dash smiled and repressed a snicker. She left the room for a moment, returning with a spare blanket that she draped over Gilda’s sleeping pony form. The front door shut quietly behind her as she left her home. 

“Guess I should go see Twilight, then.” Rainbow Dash sighed, but still wore a smirk. Her wings spread out, and with a powerful leap and a single flap, was sent soaring through the air in the direction of the old Ponyville library.





It was late in the evening when Gilda roused herself from sleep. 

“Ugh, my head,” Gilda whined softly. She could hear hushed voices coming from another room. Slowly, she pulled herself onto her tired hooves. Her muscles felt even worse than before from overuse, and she was still a far cry from well rested, but her curiosity got the better of her.

Gilda slowly cantered through the cloud home's living room and rounded a corner to the opening of the kitchen. What she found was a purple unicorn mare having a cup of tea and chatting with her friend, Rainbow Dash.

The unicorn noticed Gilda step into the room and smiled. “Well good morning,” she greeted her.
 
“Hey, Gilda, we didn’t wake you up did we?” Rainbow Dash asked casually.
 
Gilda aimed a shrug at Dash and gingerly took a seat at the kitchen's table. “So who the hay are you?” she asked the unicorn with a flat look.
 
The purple mare looked between Gilda and Rainbow Dash for a moment. When the latter offered a shrug of her own, she decided to speak. “My name is Twilight Sparkle.” Twilight looked at Gilda expectantly, but only received the same look as before.
 
“Ahem…” Twilight cleared her throat awkwardly under Gilda’s scrutinizing stare. “Dash told me about your condition. You used to be a griffin?”
 
Gilda blinked several times at Twilight, unsure of what to make of the mare. Rather than answer her question, she turned to Rainbow Dash and cocked her head to the side. “Okay, what gives, Dash? Who is this and why did you tell her about me?”
 
“Relax, Twilight is a total egghead.” Rainbow Dash paused for a moment while Twilight groaned and complained at the mention of the word, all the while giving Gilda a subtle smirk. “She’s the smartest mare I know when it comes to magic. If anypony can fix you, she can.”
 
Gilda managed a snicker at Rainbow Dash’s jab to her friend. She turned to the purple mare and gave her a sly grin. “Okay, egghead, I’ll give you a shot.”
 
Twilight groaned again, but offered a strained smile to Gilda and a glare to Rainbow Dash for snickering. “I’m going to assume that means you really were a griffin before.” She nodded to herself thoughtfully. “Okay then... I guess for starters, tell me about the first time you noticed the change.” A quill and notepad levitated from out from Twilight’s saddle bags and she motioned for Gilda to begin with her hoof.
 
Gilda shot Rainbow Dash an uncertain look, to which she received an assuring nod.
 
After an exaggerated sigh, Gilda began recalling the events of her unfortunate experience. “Okay then. Guess it started the day after I left Ponyville about a year ago. I- Dash you got anything to drink?” Gilda let out a weak cough. “Haven’t had anything to drink all day.”

Rainbow Dash nodded. “Yeah sure, gimme a sec.” She cantered over to her sink and began filling a cup of water.

Twilight blinked a few times in confusion before groaning and scratching out the notes she had just taken. “Hehe,” she chuckled. “I wrote down your request…”

Gilda snorted and took the cup from Rainbow Dash readily. She was clumsy however and spilled just as much water on her coat as she drank. 

“Darn it!” Gilda snarled as she dropped the cup entirely. She moaned and let her head smack the table. “I would kill for my claws back…” 

Twilight took an uncomfortable scooch away from Gilda on her side of the table while Rainbow Dash moved around and placed a hoof on the former griffin.

“Hey, don’t sweat it. Whatever this is, I’m sure we can help.” Rainbow Dash put on her most confident smile. “Right, Twilight?”

Twilight nodded vigorously to Gilda upon receiving her gaze. “Certainly! It's all just a matter of putting the puzzle pieces together. Now, I first need to know what happened, before we can begin. Or, at least what you know.”

Gilda rubbed her despised hooves together thoughtfully and sat up. “Alright, it was the day after I left Ponyville.”

Gilda briefly considered bringing up her outburst after the events at the party, but decided mentioning that she started attacking random plant life just because its color vaguely reminded her of her best friend wasn’t going to win her any popularity contests. “I was flying home and stopped up in the mountains to rest for the night. There wasn't anything weird about the place that I could see. I even went back there a couple times...” Gilda stared down at her hooves in deep thought. “But when I woke up the next morning… I was like this.”

Twilight stopped her scribbling and looked up. “That’s it? It just happened? Why didn't you come back for help?”

In response, the former griffin just stared dully at Rainbow Dash for a few moments before speaking. “Guess I figured I wasn’t welcome. Plus, I was pretty sure I could get better help from some actual griffins and not some lame hay-brained—” Gilda trailed off and her eyes widened slightly.

“Err…” She stumbled over what to say under the expressions of the ponies in the room for her. “No offense?”

Rainbow Dash facehooved while Twilight shook her head in disappointment. “Just tell us what you did instead,” the unicorn mare harrumphed.

Chuckling sheepishly, Gilda continued. “I kinda flipped out and did the first thing any griffin would do in my situation.”

Both of the other mares in the room with Gilda replied in tandem. “And?”

Gilda shrugged indifferently. “Slammed my skull into a few rocks trying to wake up.” She smirked at the wince she earned from Twilight and the eye roll from Rainbow Dash. “When that didn’t work, I spent the next two days flying home.”

“And how did that work out?” Rainbow Dash asked, despite already guessing the answer herself.

Gilda gave her a flat look. “How do you think? My folks were… understanding after some convincing I was who I said I was.” She slumped her head in one hoof thoughtfully. “We went to see dozens of griffin specialists, but most of them were whack jobs. More than just a few of them blamed it on my visit to ponyland though. And after the last year of… this, can’t say I disagree.”

Twilight spoke up from behind her notes. “So you came back thinking we could help?”

“Kind of? I mean…” Gilda's tone became sullen. “I also came here because I was tired of home.” 

This only earned her a couple of confused looks, so she continued.

“At first everyone was okay about my situation. But the longer I stayed like this, the more everyone started treating me differently. Sometimes pity, sometimes being overly nice. Sometimes a jerk. Whatever it was, it was different than normal.” She glared down at the table with her brow furrowed in anger. “Guess the breaking point was when my dad actually called me a pony to my face after a fight, not that he was wrong.” 

“You really don’t like us do you?” Twilight asked, surprising everyone in the room.

“I— I guess not, but can you blame me?” Gilda asked indignantly.

Twilight shook her head, paused in thought. “Whatever the problem is, I’ll do my best to help you. No matter what your opinion of us is. I can’t force you to like ponies, but I can at least be an example of why you shouldn't dislike us. Besides, weren’t you and Dash friends before?”

Gilda stared at Rainbow Dash as she spoke. “Dash was… is different.”

Rainbow Dash smiled and held out a hoof. There was a brief pause while Gilda considered the gesture. She soon smiled and bumped her hoof against her friend’s with a resounding clop.

“So, we cool?” Gilda asked hesitantly.

“Not quite," Dash replied, narrowing her eyes slightly, but still smiling. “You still gotta make it up to my other friends before it’s all old times again!” 

Gilda rolled her eyes. “Only for you, Dash. But I guess that’s fair.”

“Excellent!” cried an excited Twilight that shook the two other mares from their moment. “As for your predicament, we can start on the research first thing tomorrow!”

Gilda tilted her head to the side. “Why not now?”

Twilight chuckled. “Because it’s almost midnight.”

Gilda ventured a look out the window and saw the moon high in the sky. “Oh…” she mumbled.

“We all need our rest, especially you.” Twilight seemed concerned as she scanned over Gilda’s features. “You really look terrible. Maybe you should accompany Fluttershy and I to the spa tomorrow.”

“Whoa, hold your pony feathers there. Dash and I would never be caught dead in a place like that. Ain’t that right, Dash?” Gilda turned to her friend with a grin that melted at the sight of Rainbow Dash’s guilty smile. “No… Dash, you didn’t...”

“Hehe…” Rainbow Dash chuckled. “Noooo, never.” She got up and started walking Twilight to the front door of the house.

Gilda facehoofed. “I don’t even know you anymore…” Despite herself, she chuckled at the idea of Rainbow Dash squirming through a hooficure, and made to follow the two other mares.

Twilight had made it to the door and opened it when Gilda’s sudden call caught her attention.

“Hey Egghe— I mean Twilight!” Gilda called out.

Twilight turned her head back into the cloud home. “Yes, Gilda?”

Gilda swallowed hard. “Tha… Thank you.”

Twilight smiled brightly at the bashful show before her. “Don’t mention it, that’s what friends do.” With a few steps and a light click from the door, Twilight was gone.

> Under The Microscope
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


Under The Microscope



The basement of the Golden Oak Library was alive with flashing lights, beeping appliances, and a unicorn frantically galloping about, taking notes and reading charts. Gilda rolled her eyes at the show and only shivered a little when Twilight blasted her with a wave of magic for what seemed like the hundredth time that morning, allegedly just to scan her body for “anomalies”.  

The metal braces on Gilda’s fetlocks itched and she groaned for the upteenth time since her and Rainbow Dash’s arrival to the library. She wiggled her hooves and shook the metal helmet strapped to her head in idle boredom while Twilight busied herself by reading the seemingly random lines being transcribed by a beeping machine in the corner of the room.

“So… what are you doing to me again?” Gilda asked for the tenth time.

Twilight sighed before repeating herself once again. “My earlier sensory spells didn’t pick up anything too strange about your condition, and I don’t know of any spells that can just turn somepony, err… griffin, into another species altogether without leaving a trace.” 

Twilight paused while she read over the latest assortment of nonsensical scribbles produced by the machine. “So I decided that science might provide a clearer answer… But according to these, you’re a perfectly normal pony.”

“But I’m not a pony!” Gilda shouted.

“I know, but if I didn’t know any better, these statistics would suggest that being a griffin had been the problem all along and that you had really been a pony your whole life.” Twilight concluded her statement dourly. She almost seemed as upset that her tests had failed to present any conclusive data as Gilda was about being a pony in the first place.

“So all of this was a waste of time?” Gilda seethed. “I should have known better than to think you lame hay-munchers could help me!” Her head shook violently until the hat came off, and she pried her hooves from the shackles. She was ready to stomp her way up out of the basement and the library itself, until Rainbow Dash flew down from one of the rafters where she had been lounging.

“Hey! Hold up!” Rainbow demanded, a look of stern resolve on her face. “We talked about this last night. If you want our help, than you have to be nice to everypony. Especially our friends!”

Gilda actually shrank back from Rainbow Dash’s glare. It wasn’t until she summoned up whatever was left of her old griffin pride that she was able to talk back with her usual ferocity. “Hate to break it to you, Dash, but no answers means no deal! If your princess’ ‘prized student’ can’t figure this out then I’m out of here!” 

“Please, Gilda...” Twilight approached pleadingly. “We’ve only been at this for a few hours, and you’ve been like this for a whole year. The traces of the cause have faded quite a bit, but I’m sure I’ve seen this somewhere before! If you just calm down and give me some time-”

“Calm down… Time!?” Gilda’s face contorted into an expression of rage. “I have been a pony for a year, you hay brained book worm! And I have lost everything!” Her raving turned livid. “My friends stopped looking at me like a griffin after only a month of this. No one I knew recognizes me anymore. And my own father called me a dumb know nothing pony. To. My. Face!” She shook her head when her vision started to blur. “Just… I need to go. Move your flank, Dash.”

Gilda started to walk around her floating friend, but was cut off again when Rainbow Dash zipped back in front of her and stomped down onto the ground.

Rainbow Dash reared up onto her hind legs and looked ready to snap. 

Gilda flinched and closed her eyes, fearing she may have gone too far somehow. She didn’t expect the light touch of hooves on her shoulders, or the look that Rainbow Dash was giving her when she opened her eyes. That look especially threw her off. It wasn’t of pity or disgust, like she had come to expect from her time spent back home. 

Gilda could only think of one word to describe it: Understanding. The look made her hind legs feel weak, and she sank to her haunches. Another touch came from her back and she found Twilight behind her, resting a hoof between her wings. It took everything she had not to break down into sobs where she sat—with the exception of the fact she would never in a million years tear up in front of anybody or anypony else.

“Gilda, I know this sucks, but we will fix this. Twilight will fix this.” Rainbow Dash looked so sure of her own words that Gilda couldn’t bring herself to object. “But you have to check that attitude if you're going to get along with any of us.” 

Seeing the grin on Rainbow Dash’s face told her that she hadn’t just ruined her chances of fixing the situation. But the expectant look that followed told her what she had to do if she still wanted help.

With a sigh, Gilda turned to face the unicorn still patting her on the back. “Twilight, I’m s—“ The sudden rumble from her stomach was loud enough to derail her thoughts and knock out the remaining tension in the air. “Starving!” 

The three of them chuckled at the abrupt mood shift.

“Apology accepted," Twilight replied. “Let’s go get some lunch, Celestia knows I’m hungry too.” She nodded at Gilda thoughtfully. “Any preferences?”

“Now that you mention it, I have a huge craving for bacon!” Gilda cracked a smile and her mouth watered slightly. Rainbow Dash’s mortified look caught her attention, as well as Twilight’s confused one.

“What’s bacon? I’ve never heard of that before.” Twilight’s head was tilted to the side, her hoof rubbing her chin idly. Behind her, Rainbow Dash was shaking her head at Gilda, violently mouthing the word no repeatedly.

“Uhh…” Gilda backpedaled mentally for some sort of way out. “How about you decide, since I don’t know much about Ponyville.” She gave a fake smile and Rainbow Dash seemed to exhale in relief.

“Alright… but I still want to know what bacon is.” Twilight continued staring at Gilda as Rainbow Dash facehoofed from behind her.

Gilda looked between them briefly. “I’m pretty sure that’s a bad idea... Are you sure?”  An eager nod from Twilight sealed the poor unicorn mare’s fate. Rainbow Dash folded back her ears and covered them with her hooves.

Gilda shrugged and leaned in close to Twilight. She had once told Rainbow Dash what bacon was in detail, and that ended with a promise from the griffin to never again describe any non-pony friendly food that she ate. 

As she whispered the the general idea of where bacon comes from, how it’s prepared, and an idea of the griffin diet overall, Twilight’s features changed from purple, to green, and, disturbingly enough, purple again.

Before Gilda could finish, Twilight bolted up the stairs of the basement and could be heard slamming the door to what Gilda assumed was a bathroom somewhere above in the library. All of which amused the once-griffin-now-pony, sprawled out on the floor laughing hysterically. 

Rainbow Dash stood over Gilda for a while, her face completely bemused. When the griffin did take notice, she only snorted at her. 

“Come on, Dash! She asked for it!” Gilda choked out after catching her breath.

Rainbow Dash rolled her eyes but chuckled all the same. “Whatever. Let’s just say that deal between us goes for all my friends from now on. I’m gonna go check on Twilight, so try not to scar Spike for life, okay?”

Gilda gave a mock salute from the ground and watched her friend go. She followed up the basement stairs shortly after and ran into the aforementioned baby dragon near the kitchen of the library. A mischievous sneer crossed her muzzle, and she approached her unsuspecting victim. 

“Hey, Spike,” Gilda greeted him.

“Oh, hi Gilda! You guys done with the tests for now?” Spike was smiling, his innocence almost visible from Gilda’s point of view.

“You know any cows around here in Ponyville?” Gilda rubbed a hoof against her chest and inspected it nonchalantly.

“Yeah, I’ve met a few. This one cow I know, her name is Bertha, and-” Spike was cut off from his reverie by Gilda’s sudden inquiry.

“You ever heard of ground beef?” Gilda’s sneer could have peeled paint.

“Yep.” Spike said flatly. He rolled his eyes and began going about his business, Gilda’s intentions set out clearly.

“Thought so, you see… Wait what?” Gilda guffawed at the little dragon walking away from her.

“Uh huh. I found a book in the library about predators a few months ago. When I got bored I read through it. I tried talking to Twilight about it, but when she found the book she threw it out, something about it being a tome of evil.” Spike shrugged as he climbed a ladder and re-shelved a few books he had picked up from the table at the center of the room. “I read most of it beforehand so I know most of what it was about, there was even a section on griffins from before the treaty.”

Gilda closed her slackened jaw and grinned at Spike. “For a little guy like you that lives with ponies, you’re not as soft as I thought. Not like these ponies, anyway.”

Spike raised an eyebrow. “Thanks, I think... But ponies really aren’t as bad as you think. Maybe you should rethink the way you look at them.”

Gilda’s smile flattened at his words. “Or maybe not…” she mumbled to herself. Spike’s words didn’t leave her however, and she was left to ponder them in silence while he went about his chores. The ponies had been nothing but helpful to her since she got there, and even after the way she had treated them. Any self-respecting griffin she knew would have socked her in the beak a long time ago—or muzzle, as was the current case. 

It wasn’t until Twilight and Rainbow Dash came down from the upper floor that Gilda was able to push her thoughts aside. 

Twilight looked more peeved than nauseated. She gave Gilda a withering look briefly, then turned her attention away as she walked towards the front door, Rainbow Dash in tow. “Spike, we’re gonna get some lunch. Watch the library while we’re gone, okay?”

“Sure thing, Twilight!” Spike returned without hesitation.

Gilda hurried after them and only just caught up to Rainbow Dash before Twilight was out the door. “She mad about the bacon?”

“Eeyup,” Rainbow Dash confirmed.

Gilda cracked a smile while she trotted alongside the ponies she was with. She was fairly sure she lost the right to pick where they were going, but she still felt it had been totally worth it.





Gilda frowned at the plate of hay fries before her. As far as pony food went, it wasn’t the worst. Mostly, she was frowning because of the added company the three of them—herself, Twilight and Dash—had picked up on their way to the cafe.

Twilight insisted on going through the market on their hunt for food. By a stroke of luck, good or bad depending on who you asked in the group, the three of them had run into Applejack and Fluttershy. They had been in the middle of packing up an apple stall to break for lunch. They claimed to have plans for lunch that day, as well, and were all too happy to tag along.

So now the number of ponies Gilda was forced to interact with had doubled, and from what she picked up from Fluttershy, another would soon be joining them. 

Gilda’s self pity was disrupted when she realized she had been asked a question. “What was that?” she mumbled over a mouthful of food, looking up.

It was Fluttershy that had spoken, and she looked frightened. “Are you really that Gilda?” she squeaked from behind her mane.

There was a pause while Gilda swallowed her food. Everypony’s eyes were on her, but only she, Fluttershy, and Twilight knew what was really being asked. “Oh, yeah, that’s me…”

Fluttershy took a nervous step back from the table. Her retreat was stopped by Twilight’s firm hoof on her back. Twilight herself leveling a narrow glare at Gilda.

Rubbing the back of her head with one hoof, Gilda let out a sigh. “Look, I’m… sorry about before. I won't do that... again.”

Fluttershy sat down at the table once more, but only stared down at her food. Both Applejack and Rainbow Dash were still staring at her, while Twilight was busying herself by comforting the yellow pegasus with reassurances.

“What did you do to Fluttershy, Gilda?” Rainbow Dash questioned with a measured look and a slight crack in her voice.

There was an awkward silence as Gilda shifted where she sat. To everypony’s surprise it was Fluttershy that spoke up first. 

“She roared at me,” she stated bluntly.

The table grew silent and a few conversations from the surrounding patrons were the only noises staving off total silence.

Applejack glared daggers at Gilda, while Rainbow Dash and Twilight shook their heads in tandem. Gilda couldn’t decide if she felt ashamed or annoyed that she was receiving the third degree from the ponies that she had all but forgotten about less than a week ago.

“Apology accepted,” came a shockingly cheery squeak from Fluttershy.

Everypony at the table did a double take at the yellow pegasus. Applejack harrumphed after a moment but seemed to accept it, Rainbow Dash sighed in relief before taking a happy bite of her pie, and Twilight seemed to take pride in her friend’s resolve. Gilda actually smiled.

“Thanks, Fluttershy.” Gilda’s face soured after the words left her mouth. “You ponies are brainwashing me…” she lamented before shoving a hoof full of hay fries in her mouth.

Chewing noisily, Gilda tried her best to drown out Fluttershy’s giggles. “So we have the shy one, the down home pony, my best friend, and the egghead. All we’re missing is the pink fuzz-wad and this couldn’t possibly be more awkward,” she drolled once her mouth was clear.

“Oh, Pinkie? Nah, Sugar Cube Corner is always real busy around lunch. We probably won’t see her for another hour or two.” Rainbow Dash piped in idle amusement at Gilda’s obvious concern at running in to the party pony.

Gilda let go of a breath she hadn’t realized she had been holding in. She felt slightly concerned at just how much running into Pinkie seemed to stress her out. “Well, I guess I dodged the cart on that one. Maybe this won’t get any worse-”

Rainbow Dash’s face hoof caught Gilda off guard. “Gilda, why would you say that? You never want to say that.”

As if to answer Gilda’s unasked question, a measured and lady-like voice floated itself to the ears of the five ponies.

“Oh, girls! I’m so sorry I’m late,” Rarity called over to them as she trotted up to the table. “Sweetie Belle spilled glitter all over my last sheet of velvet and-” Rarity trailed off and gasped when her eyes found their way to Gilda’s form.

Seeing the way Rarity’s eyes widened to the size of small dinner plates and sparkle at her caused Gilda to shift uncomfortably. She looked at Rainbow Dash who leveled a deadpan look in return. “That’s why,” Rainbow Dash mouthed to her.

Rarity quickly zipped up to Gilda and pinched her cheeks betwixt her hooves. “My word,” she murmured breathlessly. “I’ve never before seen such exotic colors as these in a pony’s coat and mane! Why, she looks positively fierce, powerful! Like a… a…”

“A griffin…?” Rainbow Dash offered from off to the side, snickering at her struggling friend.

Rarity threw one foreleg up into the air and took the struggling pony up into a headlock. “Yes! Exactly that!” she exclaimed. “Why, with colors like these, and a cultured, wizened mentor like myself… I could easily— I mean, you, could easily take the fashion world by storm!”

Gilda finally managed to wrench herself free of the surprisingly strong, alabaster colored mare that had gotten a hold of her. “G-Get off me! Gah—” Her throat felt as though it had been caught in a vice. “What are you, crazy?”

“No, that’s Rarity. She’s a friend,” Applejack chimed in for the first time, chuckling and watching events with an amused look.

Rarity, oblivious to Gilda’s discomfort, continued to prattle on about the glorious team they could make in the world of fashion. Gilda looked around the table for help, finding most everypony snickering at the scene she was trapped in. 

Rainbow Dash popped the last of her pie in her mouth and got up as if to leave. Gilda saw this as an opening for retreat and leaped at the opportunity... literally. 

“Where you going, Dash?” Gilda asked after jumping across the table and in front of the pegasus. Rarity was left holding air where the pegasus had slipped away.

“Uhh…” Rainbow Dash stammered at the sudden blockade. “Weather duty. I mentioned it, like, ten minutes ago? I'll be done quick.”

“Oh, great, let me come with!” The smile on Gilda’s face was a pleading one at best and didn’t go unnoticed.

“Alright I guess… Just keep up would ya?” Rainbow Dash chided.

“Oh, you are so—!” Gilda was interrupted by Rarity as she popped up between them. 

“And just where are you going!?” Rarity demanded rather than asking for one. “I haven’t even started to talk about the fall line up!”

Rainbow Dash stepped back to look at Gilda and began to hover off the ground. The look on her face read along the lines of “let her down nicely”.

The unspoken words went straight over Gilda’s head. “That sounds horrifying though,” she deadpanned. 

Rainbow frowned and quirked an eyebrow, to which Gilda muttered, “Grr, fine…” She turned, and faced the fashionista patiently waiting behind her. “Sorry, but I don’t do fashion. It’s kind of for lame-o’s and uptight types only.”

Rarity’s jaw dropped, and she looked completely stricken, to Gilda’s amusement. 

Rainbow rolled her eyes. “Well, I guess that wasn’t so bad…”

Gilda growled and went on. “Look, I don’t have time for this. I have clouds to pop and rain to drop. Let’s continue this conversation never.” Her wings snapped out and she was propelled ahead of her friend before another word could be let in edgewise.

Rarity stood dumbly for only a moment before her face reddened in anger. “Hmph!” she mumbled while turning up her nose.

“Sorry, Rarity. She’s not… Okay she’s pretty much always like that,” Rainbow Dash confided. “But she’s kind of in a rough spot right now. I’d explain if I had time, but I do have to get to work. I’m sure Twilight can fill you in.”

Rarity stared a moment, then with some effort sighed and turned to face Rainbow Dash. “She didn’t have to be so rude! Honestly, she’s worse than you when I asked you to model a dress for me.”

“Yeah…” Rainbow Dash chuckled. “You should have seen the look on her face when Twilight suggested we go to the spa!” The girls all broke out into giggles at that, which Rarity eventually joined.

After the bout of laughter, Rainbow gave a final, quick wave farewell, and sped off towards Gilda’s rapidly shrinking form.

“That mare is in a spot of trouble, is she?” Rarity asked nopony in particular, a mild sneer on her muzzle. “What a shame…” She turned to Twilight and put on an innocent look. “So, what exactly did happen to Rainbow’s friend, Twilight?” 





Gilda was lounging on a rather large cloud when Rainbow Dash finally caught up.

“Come on, Dash!” Gilda snickered. “You’re not getting slow on me, are ya?”

“Not a chance! And I’ll prove it, too,” Rainbow Dash challenged back. “All these clouds have to go, and we need to water the south field of Sweet Apple Acres. First pony to finish their half wins!”

“You’re on!” Gilda exclaimed before bucking the cloud behind her. “Go!”

What followed was a blur of blue and brown as the two of them raced about the sky, smashing clouds or moving them out of the way for later use. It took maybe thirty seconds before the large clump of clouds was entirely cleared from the east side of Ponyville, and the two of them were racing to Applejack’s farm. Each of them pushing a rain cloud in front of them. 

“What’s the matter, Dash? No new tricks?” Gilda cackled as she pulled into the lead. 

“You haven’t seen anything yet!” Rainbow Dash called back, before her wings beat harder and her speed began to accelerate.

Despite her best efforts, Gilda was at a complete loss trying to match Rainbow Dash’s speed. She heard a whistle from the rainbow trail Dash was leaving behind, right up until an explosion of colors erupted without warning all around her.

Gilda stopped her wing flaps dead and sat down on the cloud she had been pushing. Her mouth was agape at both the expanding prismatic ring soaring overhead and the pressurized wind that ruffled her mane. Rainbow Dash was barely visible in the distance, already bouncing up and down on her cloud after winning their little competition.

“Ha! I wi-” Rainbow was cut off by the brown and white pegasus that plowed into her in a flying tackle.

“What the hay, Dash!? Since when could you do a sonic rainboom?” Gilda interrogated her, a huge grin on her muzzle.

Gilda was holding Rainbow Dash aloft on her own wing power alone, Dash being dazed by the sudden attack. “Oh, that? For a while now,” she boasted. 

Gilda let go of Rainbow Dash and earned a yelp from her before she climbed back into the sky. “Why didn’t you tell me!?” Gilda asked. Her expression melted to melancholy along with Rainbow’s. “Oh… right.”

The two of them fluttered to the ground of the orchard they had been hovering over. An awkward silence hung between them. 

“Look, Dash… I’m-” Gilda struggled to find the right words.

“Save it.” Dash stopped her. “Let’s start over.” Rainbow Dash smiled at her before punching her in the foreleg harder than Gilda expected.

“Hey! What was that for!?” Gilda exclaimed.

“For the way you talked to Rarity back at the cafe! How many times do I have to tell you to be nice?” Rainbow Dash leered at her.

“Geez, is that all? You know how I-” Gilda’s ears swiveled around to a soft sound in the distance. She couldn’t make it out completely, but whatever it was sent a shiver down her spine.

“Something wrong?” Rainbow Dash asked.

"Uh, nothing. I thought I heard-" Gilda heard it again, closer this time. Her pupils shrank to the size of pins as she realized what it was: Giggles. “Dash, we have to go! Now.” Gilda panicked, looking around for an escape, even her wings all but forgotten.

“What is it?” Rainbow Dash tensed at her friend's panicked demeanor.

“She’s coming!” Gilda could hear the giggles growing in volume and responded by trotting in place nervously. 

“Huh?” Rainbow Dash perked her ears out and smiled when she recognized the voice in the distance. “Oh. Sounds like Pinkie finished up at work,” she concluded.

“Every griffin for herself!” Gilda proclaimed before galloping in a random direction through the trees.

“Whoa! Wait up!” Rainbow Dash called out in vain. 

“No way!” Gilda bellowed over her shoulder. “I never want to see that pony agai-”

“Hi there!” Pinkie greeted Gilda while hanging upside down from a tree limb she had dropped out of. “Are you a new friend!?” She giggled, a hoof laid over her muzzle, then went on. “Oh, that’s a silly question, even for me! Because you know what they say, everypony’s just a new friend waaaiting to be discovered!”

Gilda’s eye twitched while she stared in shock, then screamed like a startled chicken. Her wings flared and she shot straight up into the sky... Only to ram head first into a thick tree branch. She saw stars and fell back to the ground with a flop.

Pinkie winced and looked over to Rainbow Dash, who had caught up in time to see the incident. “Was it something I said?” she asked desperately, then shrugged, which meant she let go of the tree limb altogether. There was a thud followed by an “Oomf” as she too fell down onto the ground besides Gilda.

Rainbow Dash surveyed the scene of the crime, ears folded back against her head. “Oh boy, here we go…”



> Don't Mess With the Dress
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


Don’t Mess With the Dress

 
 
Gilda’s head was still spinning when she started to wake up. A dull throbbing pulsed just above her forehead, and she could swear she could see little ponies hovering around her head. Two of them had a stupid smirk on their faces, and three others looked to be having a hard time holding back a torrent of giggles.
 
Gilda shook her head and squinted at the offending visions. Only two remained after that, and it turned out to be Rainbow Dash and Pinkie Pie respectively. A quick glance to the earthy ground on her left revealed a fallen tree branch and her memories returned along with a rush of annoyance.
 
“Right… that happened,” Gilda grumbled to herself as she got to her hooves, Dash assisting her without prompting.

 Rainbow Dash's wide grin was still intact, right up until she spoke. “Yikes, Gilda, I haven’t seen anypony that scared of somepony since Applejack ran into Zecora for the first time.”
 
Gilda gave the pink mare in front of her a scrutinizing look. “I wasn’t scared, Dash!” she snapped. “I just… No, you know what? I’m out of here.”
 
Pinkie’s giggles failed her and were replaced with a confused frown. She watched Gilda’s retreating form for a moment before looking over to Rainbow Dash, but only received a frown and shrug for her troubles.  “Hey, wait!” The words left her as she bounded after the new pony.
 
Gilda didn’t stop or turn around to address Pinkie, but she didn’t increase her pace when the mare caught up to her either.

“My name’s Pinkie Pie! But you can just call me Pinkie. All of my-“ she introduced herself, or began to, until Gilda cut in that is.

“I know your name, and I’m not your friend,” Gilda stated, without taking her eyes off of the path ahead of her.

“Wh-What? You know my name already!? That’s fantastic! Are you a part of Party Goers United!?” Pinkie asked excitedly.

Rainbow Dash had glided over to Pinkie’s side at this point and kept pace with the other two mares trotting on hoof. “Pinkie,” she tried to say, “That pony there is—”

Gilda interrupted. “Actually, yes, I am. But that’s not how I know you,” she answered back.
 
“Oh really?” Pinkie said thoughtfully. “Well, you do look like the type of pony that would like to party.  I know your name is Gilda, but the only Gilda I know is that meanie pants griffin. She had brown fur and feathers all over, except for on her head! Those were white with purple highlights. I really wanted to be her friend so I threw her a party way... back—” 

Pinkie’s eyes widened, and she gave Gilda a more thoughtful look. “Oh…”
 
Gilda had cringed at being called a pony, but that gave way to a wry smile when Pinkie finally started putting two and two together. “Can’t say it’s a pleasure to see you again either, fuzz-wad,” she remarked.
 
Pinkie was smiling sheepishly at the newly discovered griffin turned pony. “Hehe…” She chuckled and looked to Dash for assistance.
 
“I tried to tell you, Pinks.” Dash said, shaking her head, but otherwise smirking.

"Wow-zers, how'd that even happen?" Pinkie asked, her head tilting at a ninety-degree angle. "A new shampoo? Oh, and, uhm, sorry for not recognizing you, Gilda." She added an apologetic grin for good measure.
 
"Wish I knew." Gilda shrugged and adjusted her wings, giving off an air of disinterest. “And don’t sweat it, fuzz-wad. I don’t like you either way." She could hear Dash mumble something about being nice, and she ignored it.

“But I like you, Gilda!” Pinkie insisted as she hopped out in front of Gilda, bouncing backwards at a steady pace. "I meant it when I said I really wanted to be your friend."
 
Gilda wasn’t sure what was more off-putting, the slightly wild look in Pinkie’s eyes, or the fact that she was able to bounce like her legs were made of rubber. “How are you…?” she started, but shook her head. “Look, no offense… Actually, take offense if you want, but you really annoy me. Not a little. A lot. You drive me crazy, actually, and that’s why I will never be your—” She stopped in her trot and gave Dash a pleading look. “Seriously, what the heck!?”

Dash came to a stop beside Gilda with little more to offer than a chiding smile and a shrug.
 
Pinkie continued in her backwards bounce for a few strides too long, and was rewarded with an audible slam into a tree. The tree shook and ended up dropping an apple onto her head, the impact going from “Ouchie” to “Oh, hey, an apple!”

Gilda stared aghast at Pinkie as she began to balance the apple on her nose like a trained seal, as if she hadn’t just made a foal of herself.

“That! Right there!” Gilda exclaimed, pointing an accusing hoof at the ridiculous mare.

Pinkie’s eyes widened and she followed Gilda’s hoof down to her own chest, forgetting the apple that had been the center of her focus only moments ago. “What is it? Do I have something on me? Is it a cupcake!? Oh! I knew I didn’t eat all seven of them on the way here!” She began searching all over herself while becoming lost in her own ramblings, her apple teetering off her nose.

“Gah…” Gilda groaned and facehoofed.

“Relax, Gilda,” Rainbow Dash soothed. “That’s just Pinkie being Pinkie.” 

Pinkie was now spinning in circles on the ground in a ludicrous attempt to search through her ridiculously poofy tail, all the while exclaiming promises to find an elusive pastry.

“How do you put up with her?” Gilda blanched. 

Rainbow Dash sat back on her flank and touched a hoof to her chin thoughtfully. “You know…” she began. “I didn’t always get along with her so well, either.”

Gilda looked at Dash with a deadpan expression. “Really? That’s hard to believe.”

Rainbow chuckled but continued on. “In fact, it wasn’t really until just the day before you came to town that we really hit it off and got to know each other as friends. We spent the whole day pulling crazy pranks on just about everypony we knew. We still do every now and then.”

Gilda looked down at Pinkie who had finally caught her tail and was now pulling things out of it at random. She had to duck when Pinkie tossed a rubber chicken over her shoulder and nearly smacked Gilda with it. “I get that she’s crazy, but I have a limit to what I’m willing to put up with. Most ponies are bad enough, but she’s just-” 

Pinkie interrupted. “What’s wrong with ponies?” she piped up, a half eaten cupcake in one hoof.

“When did you- Where did you get-?” Gilda started to ask, staring at the cupcake.

“We have a saying for this kind of thing.” Rainbow Dash informed her. “It’s called ‘because Pinkie Pie’.” 

“What is that supposed to mean?” Gilda and Pinkie asked in tandem. Pinkie in mock anger and Gilda in genuine confusion. They both turned to look at one another, with Pinkie trading her fake scowl for a confused look, at the same time that Gilda traded her confused look for an angry one.

Gilda growled, and looked away quickly.

Rainbow laughed at their combined comedy, but went on. “Pinkie is just the most random pony I’ve ever met, but she has a point. What is your problem with ponies? I always hear ‘you’re the exception, Rainbow Dash,’ or something like that, but you’ve never told me anything about why you don’t like them.”

Gilda’s face reddened slightly as the two ponies began staring at her expectantly, their ears perked forward in wait. 

“Geez, Dash, I don’t really hate ponies...” Gilda started before averting her gaze to the ground and sighing. “It’s just talk. Really... and actually I kinda, sorta like you guys a lot... A lot more than most griffins, anyway.” She looked over to Dash with a sideways glance, but didn’t face her directly. 

“Huh?” Rainbow tilted her head in confusion.

Gilda rolled her eyes slightly. “I mean, don’t get me wrong, most ponies and their tea parties and what not are lamer than lame, but… I still like being around them. Especially you, Dash. Sure, I used to talk about you, but I usually told other griffins you were a griffin yourself.” She took a breath, pausing in her hurried explanation. “But, I always stuck around Cloudsdale because I… liked it.” 

Rainbow was still having problems catching on and only continued to stare, lost at her friends sudden openness. Pinkie, on the other hoof, was quicker on the draw.

“You were mean to us because you like us? Is that a griffin thing?” Pinkie asked, tilting her head until it was perfectly parallel of the ground; all previous goofiness was missing, just as much as the cupcake she had only moments ago. “I could give it a try… Hey, uh, Dashie, you stink! Grrr.”

Pinkie leaned in close and glared at Rainbow for a moment, one eye scrunched shut and the other held wide open, while Dash raised an eyebrow back.

Pinkie turned and shrugged Gilda’s way after a few seconds of the angry looking glare. “Hmm, nope, not working for me.” 

Gilda blankly stared back at Pinkie, as if trying to get a read on her, but started talking again before long. “Anyway… no, that was…” She made eye contact with Rainbow, the pony she felt she could relate to the most. 

“That’s just me being a jerk. ” Gilda heaved a disheartened sigh and sat down before continuing. “I dunno, you guys are always so nice, it was just too easy to act better than you all. It was stupid, and is definitely not a griffin thing.” 

Rainbow’s face flickered up into an understanding look. “But you stuck around and visited all the time because you liked us deep down.”

Gilda looked downward solemnly, then nodded to the grassy Earth under hoof. “Yeah… Yeah, that’s pretty much the truth of it. Heck, maybe that’s how I got turned into a pony, because I deserved it… But, even then, this thing still scares the bacon out of me… I like you guys, but I don’t want to stay a pony.”

Rainbow Dash started chuckling. “I guess it makes sense, now that I think about it. I never thought you were such a softy, Gilda.” She leaned forward and tapped a hoof to the other mare’s shoulder.

Gilda snorted, and tossed her head back. “I am not a softy… I just feel bad now, now that I’m getting help from you guys. It's like, I have to talk about it, is all."

Without any sign of warning, Pinkie trotted closer towards Gilda, wide eyed. 

Gilda took a step backward, and warily asked, “What?” 

A grin materialized on Pinkie’s muzzle, stretching from ear to ear. “Can I hug you?” Her hooves began pitter-pattering against the ground, as if she could hardly resist keeping them there.

Gilda’s own muzzle bent downwards into a deep frown. “No,” she muttered, but held her ground. “No you can’t.”

Pinkie laid her ears back, looking sad, then perked up again. “Hehe, okay. So that’s all then? Nothing happened after that?” Her expression rather neutral for a Pinkie Pie expression, but otherwise still supportive. “You just came back to Ponyville for help because you liked us?” she asked nonchalantly.

Gilda's brow furrowed. “Huh? Well, that and Ponyville was the last place I was before I transformed. Like I just said, Dash is helping me figure it out. I thought there might be a clue here that was worth coming to find after I… embarrassed myself last year, before I flew off.” Her dour expression took on a grim smile. “Aaaand, I kinda lost my cool and told off my dad when he called me a pony. It’s funny cause I wasn’t so mad at him for calling me one as I was angry that he used it like an insult.”

This time, both of the other ponies had similar expressions of shock and disbelief. Pinkie was the first to speak up. 

“You got in a fight with your dad?” she nearly gasped in surprise.

Gilda raised an eyebrow, then nodded and stood back up to pace back and forth in front of them. “It’s not that big of a deal, but… I think he was upset for me, too. Still, he was saying stuff that I had been saying about ponies, and it got a little out of claw.”

Gilda paused in her pacing after a minute or so, having apparently calmed down enough to continue. “So, I ended up telling him off and left him speechless, then made my flight back here. But I’m glad I did, you know? I should have figured you would forgive me even after… all that.” 

A quiet pause crept in; a few wings ruffled themselves on each of the two pegasi’s backs, and Pinkie’s tail slowly swished back and forth over the ground. 

Rainbow Dash spoke up again first, cracking a smile. “So that stuff you told Twilight, which is the same thing you’ve been tellin’ me for years, isn’t true? You’ve always liked ponies?”

Gilda let out a short breath, and her eyes began searching around. “Y-Yeah, that’s what I said, alright? Look, don’t make a big deal out of this. I don’t like… this is just embarrassing, okay?” 

Rainbow trotted up to Gilda, then held her hoof out to her side wordlessly. At the same time, a cocky grin cracked along her muzzle. 

Gilda made a relaxed smile in return, then accepted it. “Only for you, Dash.”

“Oh, come on!” Pinkie squealed in mock frustration, desperately trying to subdue her own giggles. “She gets a hug but I don’t?”

Gilda rolled her eyes again over Dash’s back. After a moment of hesitation, and surprising even herself, she smiled and looked over to Pinkie, who was smiling back.   “Alright, fine, you can have a hug too if it will shut you-” 

Rainbow Dash reared back suddenly, trying to get out of Gilda’s grip. “No!” she shouted in warning.

It was too late. With an excited cheer and a running start, Pinkie tackled them both in a crushing hug. 

The wind completely knocked out of her, Gilda began vainly clawing at the air under Pinkie's embrace. When that failed to present any results, she started patting Pinkie’s back in the hopes she would take the hint. This only made the hug tighter.

Rainbow, who had managed to keep some air in her lungs, sputtered for mercy. “P-Pinkie…! Can’t…” She gasped harshly to utter her final word. “Breath!”

“Oh! Why didn’t you say so?” Pinkie spoke the question as though it were the obvious. “You girls are silly!” As if oblivious, she devolved into a fit of giggles.

Both Gilda and Dash fell onto the ground with a thump, laying there and gasping for breath. Eventually, a sharp scowl from Gilda turned Pinkie’s wide grin into an apologetic smile, but failed to stop her giggles.

Gilda wheezed, getting back to her hooves. “Wow… I know a few minotaurs she could put to shame.”

“Yep,” Rainbow confirmed as she twisted her hip with a satisfying pop. “There's nothing quite like a hug from Pinkie Pie… except maybe being tackled by a manticore.”

Gilda made a sharp forward kick with a front hoof, hoping to pop out some of her own aches. When nothing happened she frowned and started into a slow canter back to town.

Pinkie and Dash fell into line beside her, sharing goofy smiles.

Gilda gave them an appraising look. “You do know,” she began and waited for both of them to turn to her before continuing. “If either of you breath a word of what I said back there… I’ll buck you both.”

Without missing a beat, Pinkie began to give Gilda the strangest promise she’d ever seen. “Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye!”

Gilda snorted at the show. “I’m not even gonna ask how she did that with those rubber legs.” A smirk crept across her face and she looked at Dash expectantly.

“What?” Dash asked in response and looking over to Pinkie who was giving her the same look. “Oh fine… Cross my heart and hope to fly, stick a cupcake in my eye. Happy?”

Gilda chuckled, her pace picking up along with her mood. “For now.” 

A dull throb made itself known and Gilda began to gently massage her shoulder with one hoof, walking at a limping pace alongside Dash, who seemed only a little better off.

“Don’t worry, Gilda,” Dash spoke up, grinning over sheepishly. “After a few Pinkie Pie hugs, you get used to it.”

Gilda looked over with a smoldering glare, then back up at Pinkie Pie, happily leading them into town by hopping the whole way. “Yeah, I bet,” she mumbled back. “So, what’s next, Dash? We could go back and see the egg he- er, Twilight, again… Or we could do something else I guess-”

Pinkie Pie whirled about without warning, her hooves kicking up a small cloud of dust as she landed. “I have an idea!” she piped happily. The show of alacrity successfully cut off whatever else Gilda had been planning to suggest. “You two wanna try pranking some ponies!? My treeeat.” She stretched her neck until she was up into Gilda’s face, grinning and almost singing the last word. 

Gilda frowned, groaning quietly, and looked over for help. 

Rainbow saw the distress and chuckled. It was probably a bit much to hope that Gilda had warmed up to Pinkie right away. “Not right now, Pinkie. We should really get back to Twilight’s and back to figuring out a way to fix Gilda.”

Pinkie continued her smiling undeterred. “Okie dokie lokie! But you two should totally swing by Sugar Cube Corner later! I’ll make a super-duper-aly-ooper batch of scrumdidlyumptious cupcakes just for you!” 

Gilda breathed a relenting sigh. “Sure, Fuz-... Pinkie. That would be great.”

The rest of the walk went quietly for the most part. Sweet Apple Acres’ orchard eventually gave way to an open field where the path they were on continued all the way back to Ponyville. The first buildings of the little township were already approaching fast.

A little ways into the trip, just after they began crossing a cobblestone bridge on the very outskirts of town, Gilda winced a little and stopped a moment to rub at her shoulder again. Frowning, she quickly trotted back up to keep pace.

Dash noticed, and gave Gilda’s shoulder a concerned look before addressing Gilda herself. “Hey, maybe we could go see Nurse Redheart first if it’s giving you that much trouble.”

Pinkie jumped in with a frown straight away. “Oh, Gilda, I’m really sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

“Oh this?” Gilda pointed to her shoulder before sputtering a fake laugh. “I just had… Uh, some dirt on my shoulder. Thats all.” She gave Pinkie a confident smile, giving her shoulder a final nonchalant brush.

Glancing back at Dash, Gilda noticed her askance look with her mouth slightly open to say something. So she cut her off.

“Now if you really want to hear about a silly injury, then I can tell you about this one time back at Flight Camp…” A devious smile crept across Gilda’s face when an old memory trickled into light.  She paused and gave Rainbow a daring look.

Rainbow’s eyes narrowed at this and then widened in realization. “Gilda…?” She swallowed a lump in her throat and her eyes darted between Gilda and Pinkie, a panicked smile formed on her muzzle.  “Hehe… you wouldn’t...” 

Gilda glanced back at Pinkie who seemed confused but curious. She leaned in close to Dash before whispering to her. “Try me.”

Pulling her best smile out for display Gilda picked up her pace once again, doing a much better job of playing off her leg. “Like I was saying, I’m fine. Let’s just get back to the library, okay?”

Pinkie gave both of them a sideways look. “But wait, weren’t we talking about flight camp-”

“Raainbow Daaash,” A sing-songy, chiming voice rang out over the eaves and nearby buildings of Ponyville. Following just behind the voice, was Rarity. “Pinkiiie, and- Oh, it’s you.”

A huge sigh left Dash as Rarity trotted over to the three of them. 

Rarity’s expression went from jubilant to disinterested for the briefest of moments, glancing at Gilda, before returning to a happy smile. “Actually, you're just the mare I was looking for.” She gave her fabulous mane a flick with one hoof, seemingly sizing up her target.

Gilda’s expression contorted in confusion, one eyebrow higher than the other. “Uh, me? Why?”

Rarity’s smile spread a little bit further. “Well! Past transgressions between us all pushed aside, I was hoping to convince you to model some of my Fall Line dresses. Your colors are simply perfect, after-”

Gilda had to stop the pony right there, and raised up a hoof to do just that. “Alright, I don’t know how many times I have to tell you, but I’m not modeling any of your dumb dresses. I mean, come on, it’s a stupid waste of time… Even if I didn’t have more important things to be doing.”

One of Rarity’s eyes twitched and she locked in place, a forced smile directed at Gilda. “D-Dumb?! I’ll have you know I worked very hard on them!” Her smile finally cracked. “Really now, all you had to say was ‘no’...”

Rainbow crept over to Gilda’s side. “Gilda... well, to be fair I’m with you on the dresses.”

Rarity gave Rainbow an indignant look. 

Rainbow went on. “But still, that was a little harsh, G. This isn’t how we talk to our friends, or, friends of other friends… Or anypony, really.” 

Groaning, Gilda took a deep breath. “Right, okay.” She straightened out her expression into a friendly smile. “Look, uhh, not that I don’t appreciate the offer, but…”

Rarity cut in with a stomp and a snort, an indignant fire in her eyes. “Now, now Rainbow Dash. I think she’s made her feelings on the matter quite clear. And I am not one to fault a pony for their opinions.”

Gilda growled under her breath, “Not a pony…” then let out a relieved sigh, oblivious to the fact that both Pinkie and Dash were taking a few cautious steps back. “At least that’s over with then… Come on, Dash, let’s get going to—”

Gilda attempted to walk past Rarity only to be blocked off, the fashionista now dangerously up close. 

Rarity’s eyes narrowed and she leaned in until her’s and Gilda’s muzzles were nearly touching. “But I will not stand by while somepony disrespects my craft, especially one who obviously has no idea what they’re talking about!”

Gilda blinked and recoiled back as if slapped in the face with sheer surprise. She looked back to Dash, taking notice of the new distance between them, and the fact that Pinkie had vanished completely. 

“Is she for real?” A somewhat amused smile cracked over Gilda’s muzzle, while Rainbow waved a hoof at her pleadingly.

“I most certainly am!” Rarity snapped loudly, cutting in. “And I believe I need to teach you a lesson.”

The air between the three mares hung in pure silence.

Gilda stared at the Rarity, wide eyed, her brain drawing a blank on what to say or how to even react. Eventually, one side of her mouth twitched upward. A moment later and the other side joined in. It wasn’t long before Gilda was suppressing a snort.

Rarity’s expression hardened further, and Gilda couldn’t fight it any longer. She began laughing uproariously straight away, unable to control herself.

Rarity was taken aback for a moment. “And just what is so funny, Miss Gilda?”

Gilda looked up at Rarity again and her laughter escalated. “Y-You! Threatening me? You couldn’t hurt a daisy!” She guffawed between gasping for breath. “I- I just can’t…” She abandoned any hope of speaking and let her laughter take hold, flopping to the ground in her hysterics.

“I see...” Rarity growled, but put on a wicked sneer. “Perhaps you should listen before laughing.” Her tone was dignified tone as she went on, and began to pace before Dash and Gilda. “For starters, it was a threat, but not of that sort.” She paused, tilting her chin up slightly. “With that said, I challenge you to a bet.” 

Gilda’s Laughter subsided to a sporadic giggle. “W-What? A bet, huh? Hah, what would the challenge be, sewing?” Trying to get back onto her hooves, and still snickering, she gave her final reply on the matter. “I’ll pass, but thanks for the offer.”

Rarity rolled her eyes. “Please… I wouldn’t sink so low as to challenge a ruffian like yourself to something they would have no hope of defending themselves graciously at. I believe, unless I’m mistaken, that you are quite the proud pony, Miss Gilda. Correct?” 

Gilda’s brow furrowed as hints of a glare entered her expression.

Quirking an eyebrow, Rarity gave a confident smile and went on. “So, I challenge you to an Iron pony competition.”

The challenge was received by the same silence that had met the initial threat.

Rarity harrumphed, her tail lashing every few seconds as she sized up things.

Meanwhile, Gilda stared back, no longer laughing. After a moment, she leaned over to Dash. “Is she really for real?” she whispered.

Rainbow Dash gave her less fabulous friend amongst the two a sheepish look. “Maybe?” she hinted back. Both of them kept wary eyes on the pony facing them.

A fourth voice interrupted the entire debacle. “There you are, Gilda!” 

Everypony present glanced over to see Twilight, her face smiling as she approached. Applejack was following close behind.

Rarity’s demeanor brightened immediately, the scowl fading. “Twilight, Applejack! What perfect timing you both have.” She turned to them both and gave a polite nod. 

Both of the two approaching mares gave equally cheerful greetings.

“Ready to go back to work, Gilda? I have a few more ideas!” Twilight’s eyes seemingly sparkled with excitement over the declaration.

Gilda raised a hoof, about to accept the offer, but was interrupted.

Rarity stepped between the two. “If you’ll just give me a moment, Twilight. We were in the middle of a matter of honor.” 

Twilight blinked. “Uhm, okaaay.”

“Applejack.” Rarity went on before anypony else was able. “Could I ask a favor of you?” She tilted her head slightly, smiling.

Applejack pushed her hat back with a hoof. “I don’t see why not. What can I do for ya, sugarcube?”

Rarity’s expression darkened a little again as she gestured her head back with a single nod. “I was hoping to borrow your open field for an iron pony competition between Miss Gilda and I.”

Applejack’s eyes widened a bit in surprise. She looked over to the mare in question before addressing Rarity again. “Aw shucks, Rarity. I’m sorry, but those fields are gonna be in use for the next week, what with the preparations for the next Apple reunion and what not.”

Rarity stared a moment, then frowned demurely at the ground in understanding. “I see… Thank you anyway, Applejack. I suppose I can think of something else.”

Gilda interrupted, walking up a few paces to include herself in the circle of ponies roughly being formed. “That’s probably for the best. There’s no way you'd beat me in an athletic competition like that, Princess.” She gave Rarity a rueful grin, and looked back at Rainbow for support. 

Rainbow had one corner of her mouth drawn down into a disappointed look in return.

Applejack caught wind of what was up straight away. She cleared her throat and shot Gilda a scrutinous look, one eyebrow raised high. “But… there certainly ain’t no reason ya’ll can’t use the Whitetail Woods trail for a race. It's close by.” She gave a confident smile and a wink. “How does that sound, Rarity?”

Rarity’s expression lit up again as she turned back to face Gilda, confidence restored. “Then it’s settled! I challenge you to a race through Whitetail Woods!”

Twilight stepped up between them, worry painted across her muzzle. “Uuuh, girls? Did I miss something?”

Gilda let out yet another amused snort, and craned her head around Twilight. “Let’s say I decide humiliating you is worth my time. What would I get out of this?”

Rarity straightened her expression seriously, also looking around Twilight. “That’s for you to decide." Twilight made a groan of disapproval and backed out of their way, while Rarity went on. "But if I win, you have to model that new line of dresses for me. In fact, you even have to act as though you like it.” A big smile bloomed across her face by the time she finished.

Gilda groaned loudly, recoiling slightly. “Are you still on that?” She looked Rarity over, staring at her mane and tail that she obviously spent a huge amount of time on, and then over to Dash. Her mouth curved up into a sly grin. “Fine, but if I win, you have to get a manecut like Dash’s.”

Again, an unsettling twitch appeared in Rarity’s eye. A few seconds of silence passed while she considered the wager. “I’d like to change my side of the bet; I want a full day of you doing whatever I tell you.”

Chuckling at the sheer absurdity of Rarity’s challenge, Gilda couldn’t help antagonizing the mare further. “Psch, fine, but it doesn’t change the fact that I’m gonna kick your tail.”

Rarity got in close to Gilda again, pressing their snouts together and glaring daggers into her eyes. “Oh…! It. Is. On! Whitetail Woods! One, hour.” With that, she turned away and trotted off, only pausing long enough to gesture for Twilight to accompany her. 

Twilight was about to hesitantly follow, but turned to address Gilda instead. “What’s going on?”

Gilda shrugged, still unsure what to make of the situation herself. “She kinda flipped out on me. Gotta admit, she’s got guts though.”

A flustered sigh slipped out of Rainbow Dash and she spoke up. “Gilda made fun of Rarity’s dresses.”

Twilight’s eyes widened before letting out an all too understanding sigh. “I’ll go talk to her, and possibly start looking up that spell for hair growth… Uh, Gilda, I’ll talk to you when we can about the thing.”

Gilda nodded to Twilight absently, and was about to make a remark about the doomed competition Rarity had instigated, but was beaten to the punch by Applejack. Up until this point, she had been eerily silent with a smug expression on her face.

“I don’t think that’ll be necessary, Twi’.” Applejack remarked. “In fact, let’s you and me go talk to Rarity right now. I’ll explain along the way.” Giving Gilda one final disapproving frown, Applejack began nudging Twilight in the same direction that Rarity had just left in, despite the unicorn’s protests she didn’t need the encouragement.

Gilda and Dash were the only two ponies left when Dash finally regained her bearings. “Well, that was a thing…” she muttered, then let out a sigh. “Did you have to make fun of her like that, Gilda? Rarity loves those dresses.”

Gilda shrugged, frowning. “I was going to say I was sorry… I really didn’t expect her to wig out like that.”

Rainbow rolled her eyes, ignoring the obvious hair joke. “That’s besides the point. You were acting like this was flight camp again bullying her like that.”

Gilda groaned. “Alright, look, after I beat her, I’ll apologize for real and be totally cool about it. I didn’t want to make her mad, but she keeps talking about me being a pony and distractions like her clothes so… you know. It's not easy being nice, okay?”

Rainbow studied her friend for a long, few quiet moments, then nodded with a smile. “Yeah, I get that. Fair enough, and Rarity can be annoying sometimes. Even she will admit to that. In the future though, you should go easy, at least until you guys are better friends.”

Gilda  started walking back into town, and rolled her tongue out of her mouth with a disgusted look. “Who says I want to be friends with her?”

“Well, she’s a great mare, and one of my best friends. I bet even you would like her if you got to know her. But anyway, for now it looks like you’ve got a challenge on your hooves.”

Gilda looked over grinning. “If you could call it that. What was she thinking challenging me?”

Both of the mares shared an amused laugh, smiling.

Rainbow eventually shook her head. “Don’t get too confident. Ever since a certain… event around Ponyville, pegasi that want to run a challenge against other ponies have their wings tied to compete. I’m willing to bet she’ll ask you to do that.” 

Gilda shrugged, still trotting confidently. “Is that all? Easy peasy, I've got this.”

A wry chuckle escaped Rainbow before she went on. “And don’t count Rarity out, either. I’m not sure why she wanted to beat you… but if she thinks she has a chance, then maybe she does. She really isn’t slow, that’s for sure. You should see her when a store has a sale...” 

Gilda tilted her head back, giving a show of how little consideration she was giving the possibility of losing. “Yeah yeah, I’m not worried.”

Rainbow raised an eyebrow, smiling. “I mean, I also know Rarity does run a lot. She’s obsessed with her figure or something like that… It’s kind of weird, considering how much she hates sweat.”

Gilda finally gave signs of growing tired of the information, and exhaled a breath. “Come on, Dash, there’s no way I could lose.”

Rainbow chuckled back. “Yeah, you’re probably right about that. Poor Rarity… I have to admit, with all the time she’s spent harping about my mane, I really want to see her stuck with it.”

Gilda smirked, and gave Rainbow approving nod. “Yeah, it’ll be great. It looked like she spends a lot of time on her looks. So what do you want to do for an hour? Twilight’s busy now, thanks to Rarity, so...”

Her joking attitude faltered and Dash gave Gilda’s shoulder a meaningful look. “We could go see Nurse Redheart…”

“Or we could go find Pinkie and share a few laughs,” Gilda shot back, then sighed and shook her head. “I’m fine, Dash, I know what a sprain feels like. I just pulled it is all.”

Gilda’s stomach let out a growl and the mood lit up. “I vote we go try some of those cupcakes Pinkie was offering. Where did she go, anyway?”

“It’s Pinkie Pie. Who knows?” Dash stretched her wings out and shot Gilda a challenging look. “So, how about a warm up race to Sugar Cube Corner?”

Gilda returned the same look and spread her wings. “You’re on.”
	
	
> Ten to One Odds
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


Ten to One Odds



Gilda couldn’t even laugh at this point. She just stared at Rarity and felt tears welling up in her eyes. But, to be fair, Rainbow was laughing enough for the both of them.

Rarity was quickly approaching them both at a brisk trot, head held high, and wore the most outrageous outfit Gilda had ever seen anyone wear for anything, let alone exercise. 





On each of Rarity’s hooves was a light aqua blue sweatband. There was also a gold headband, supposedly keeping her mane out of her eyes, but without altering it in any visible way.  Around her shoulders hung a loose, faded pink shirt, and below those was a pair of black spandex shorts. The bright pink string of an undershirt just barely poked out from under the over shirt. But the most ridiculous part for Gilda were the purple hoop earrings dangling from her ears.

Gilda shut her eyes tightly, fighting back tears still, and shook her head. “There’s no way I’m gonna be able to take her seriously like that,” she muttered to Dash, who was struggling to pull herself together. Looking around, she could see Twilight, Applejack, Fluttershy, and Spike had all shown up for the race. Everypony except… “Hey Dash, where's Pinkie?” 

Rainbow’s ears perked up at the question and she started looking around the small clearing herself. “Huh, I don’t see her anywhere. That’s weird.”

Gilda hummed thoughtfully for a moment. “She wasn’t at Sugar Cube Corner earlier either,” she thought aloud. “The Cake’s cupcakes tasted pretty good but I’m kinda bummed we didn’t get any of the ones she had talked about. Did she skip out or is this just more of ‘Pinkie being Pinkie’?”

Rainbow titled her head thoughtfully. “No, Pinkie wouldn’t usually miss something like this. Something’s gotta be up with her.” She shrugged after a moment. “I’d bet we’ll find out soon enough. If anything, she’s got something planned.”

Not for the first time that day, Gilda found herself lost at what to make of Pinkie Pie. “Planned? Like what-”

“What a pleasant surprise to see you arrive with a measure of punctuality,” Rarity cut in after trotting up to them.

Gilda shrugged, still smirking. “I said I’d be here, didn’t I?”

Rarity blinked a few times, giving Gilda a suspicious look. “I see I needn’t have to mention that you aren’t allowed to use your wings, as I will not be using my magic either.” Her expression relaxed after a moment, looking over the thick elastic band Gilda had loosely secured around her middle. “I do hope it won’t be a problem for you to wear that? I don’t want to presume you haven’t raced under these conditions before, but you can take it off if you’d like. I trust you not to cheat.” She gave a short, tight smile for good measure.

Meanwhile, Gilda couldn’t stop staring at Rarity’s earrings and fought hard to keep the amusement off of her face. “Oh, no that’s fine. I’m good with whatever after Dash filled me in earlier.” She felt her face crack, and it was all she could do not to burst into laughter right in front of Rarity. 

At least Rainbow Dash did it first.

“Bwahahahaha!” Dash belted out laughing and dropped to the ground helplessly. “Seriously, Rarity? What’s with the get up? This is a race! Not the modeling runway.”

Gilda started to chuckle while Rarity’s attention was on Dash. 

Rarity harrumphed and stomped a hoof haughtily. “Just because I’m about to exert myself physically does not mean I cannot look my best while doing it!”

Seeing the earrings bounce and jiggle from Rarity’s indignant rebuttal, Gilda couldn’t hold back any longer. “Please, Rarity!” she got out before her own laughter set in. “The outfit is enough, but do us all a favor and lose the jewelry!”

Twilight spoke up from nearby on the side of the path, adding, “The earrings are a bit much, Rarity…!” 

Rarity let out a soft groan of disappointment and trotted off to the side. “Oh, very well. I suppose this isn’t one of my casual jogs in the park, hm? Fluttershy! Be a dear and hold these, please!” The subtle sound of her magic enveloping her earrings buzzed as she went, along with Fluttershy’s polite reply to her.

Gilda noticed the rest of the group watching expectantly, and choked down her giggles, nudging Dash to do the same. 

Twilight caught sight of the two snickering, and furrowed her brow. While Rarity was adjusting, she trotted over from her other friends, with Spike riding on her back. “What’s so funny? Gilda, are you still picking on Rarity?”

Gilda waved one hoof dismissively. “She doesn’t need my help for that. That outfit is more than enough on its own.”

The eyeroll and groan from Twilight was to be expected, as was the somewhat playful, somewhat warning jab from Dash that went into Gilda’s side. What was unexpected, was the downright wicked stink eye that Gilda earned from Spike.

Applejack trotted up then, shaking her head and chuckling softly. “Rarity can’t say I didn’t warn her about that…”

Shooting a quick glance back at Rainbow, Gilda coughed slightly and tried to look nonchalant. “To be fair, Twilight, Dash laughed first. I tried not to say anything.” She saw Rarity trotting up behind the others and sighed. “But yeah, I guess I could try harder.”

The earrings now tucked away, likely in Fluttershy’s saddlebags, Rarity trotted back, beaming determination at Gilda. “There! Now that that’s settled, I suppose we should get started. Are you ready, Miss Gilda?”

Gilda looked down the path at the nearby starting line. 

Letting out a sigh, mostly at how easy she expected the race to be, Gilda stepped forward and motioned for Rarity to follow. “I think I should be asking you that.” She stopped and gave Rarity another look. “But, for the record, I’m sorry for calling your dresses dumb, earlier.”

Gilda turned back before she could see Rarity’s reaction, but it didn’t stop her from hearing her response.

“Thank you, that’s very big of you…” Rarity said with a gentle tone, which became more chiding as she continued. “But that doesn’t mean you're getting out of this, or that I’m going to go easy on you.”

Gilda laughed and shot a grin back at her, surprised to see Rarity with a smirk of her own. “Hey, you're the one that challenged a real athlete to a race.” She came to a stop at a makeshift starting line between two trees. “Now let’s get this started, I wouldn’t want you to be late for that mane cut.”

Instead of issuing a retort, Gilda noticed Rarity doing some kind of breathing exercise. She looked completely focused on the trail ahead of them. If it hadn’t been for the smile she was wearing, Gilda might have thought her jab went by unheard.

Applejack spoke up and made Gilda jump slightly. “The race is a two mile sprint to the finish. No magic…” She gave Rarity a look that received a curt nod. “And no wings.” For some reason, Applejack chose to glare at Dash rather than Gilda, as Gilda would have expected.

Rainbow huffed and shot back her own glare. “C’mon, AJ, I’m not even the one racing.”

Applejack gave Gilda a wink that only confused her. “I know that, but she at least hasn’t given me a reason to think I’d need to tell her more than once.”

“Ugh…” Dash groaned and rolled her eyes.

Applejack looked ahead, a smirk on her muzzle. “On your mark.”

Gilda crouched forward, her eyes narrowing on the course. In her peripheral, she could see Rarity taking a posture of her own.

“Get set.”

Gilda tensed the muscles in her legs, building up energy for a fast start. A small jolt of pain whined from her shoulder, but she ignored it. It wasn’t her first injury after all, and she’d done harder things than a mile sprint with worse.

Rarity’s voice cut in suddenly, almost sending Gilda into a false start. “Good luck.”

Gilda regained her bearings quickly. “Back at you,” she returned smoothly.

Applejack took one final look around, then threw her hoof down. “Go!”

Gilda threw her weight forward, starting off strong to gain an early lead, and Rarity fell out of sight straight away. 

The cheering sounds of the small crowd of ponies followed her, until their shouts of encouragement began to fade away somewhat.

Getting into the stride of the race, Gilda’s legs went into a powerful mechanical rhythm as they pumped beneath her. The feeling of the earth tearing away from under her hooves and the wind ripping through her mane in a way unlike when she had her feathers, but familiar enough that it felt great; being in a competition made it even better.

Time seemed to slow down for her as she ran, her entire body going into autopilot as she immersed herself in the exertion of simply running and breathing. There was a twinge of pain still in her leg, noticeable but not quite a nuisance; she made a note to get back at Pinkie for the handicap, somehow. 

For a moment, she let the world fade away. She let herself forget about her current troubles. Being a pony, dealing with ponies, her aching leg, the half dozen cupcakes she was sure she would regret later, and even the nagging thought that her life might even be on the verge of improving. But all of these thoughts ground to a halt when she noticed a certain pony catching up, and keeping pace next to her.

Gilda took note that Rarity’s breathing was maintaining an even rhythm, exactly like the one she had started just before the race’s start. Ignoring the development, her eyes remained focused on the goal in the distance. 

For all the unicorn's worth, Gilda realized that Rarity wasn’t the total joke she had assumed.

Gilda risked a glance back and saw how far away from the starting line they already were. In fact, they were already half way through the race. The lack of exertion on Rarity’s face delivered a message loud and clear: If she didn’t start taking the race seriously, the other pony might actually stand a chance at winning. And then another thought hit her: Her penalty was to be the slave of a fashionista for an entire day, and after she had insulted her trade.

A bit of panic and focus flared in Gilda’s mind, and she doubled her efforts to make up for the distance left to go, and the lack of a lead she expected to have by now. It barely dawned on her that she couldn’t feel the pain in her leg anymore. Her speed once again exceeding Rarity’s by a good margin, she pulled into the lead.

And then, Gilda toppled forward, her leg buckling out from underneath her. One leg already missing in action, the other one crumpled with little resistance against her momentum and weight. 

In a second, Gilda’s face was grinding into the dirt, followed by the rest of her. Her eyes slammed shut just before the impact, and stayed closed until she was sure she had stopped tumbling end over end. When they opened, a white unicorn with a purple mane was standing over her.

Rarity’s face was that of pure worry. “Darling, are you alright!?”

Gilda blinked a few times, making sure she didn’t have anything in her eyes. “Uuggh- Uh, yeah.” She winced, getting up slowly. “I’m fine.”
 
A glance down the path showed they couldn’t be more than a couple hundred meters from the end. 

Gilda looked at Rarity, brow furrowed in confusion and still hunched over in pain. “You stopped…?” she asked.

Now Rarity’s face contorted into shock, rather than concern. “Of course I stopped!” she exclaimed. “What if you had been hurt? I couldn’t just leave you after a tumble like that. Are you sure you’re alright?”

Gilda groaned loudly, but not from the pain. “First Spike, and now Dash…” she muttered. The memory of her deciding what kind of personality Rarity had returned again, and got a big red X slapped over it for invalidity.

Rarity blinked and leaned in, confusion on her face. “I’m sorry, I didn’t catch that?”

Gilda rose up on all four hooves, shaking off the dust and dirt that now covered her fur. “Just figuring out I was wrong… again.” She sighed and looked towards the finish line. “So, do you want to just sprint from here, or claim an obvious win? Let’s be honest, there was no way I could have caught up after that fall...”

Rarity stared a moment, visibly puzzled by the question, then hummed thoughtfully. “Hmm… No no no, this won’t do.”

Gilda’s head tilted ever so slightly to the side. “Huh…?”

Rarity smiled and shook her head. “I just don’t feel like this was a good run for me.” She smiled coyly and began trotting down the path and away from the finish. “Would you mind terribly if we started again from just down here?”

"Oh sure," Gilda answered, and started after Rarity, falling in line beside her. “Hey, uh, Rarity, I want to start over-”

Glancing over at Gilda, Rarity quirked her brow. “The race? Don’t you think that’s a bit much, dear?”

Gilda shook her head vigorously, but hurried to clarify what she meant when Rarity’s expression grew in confusion. “No, I meant that I want to start over with you. I don’t think I gave you a fair-”

Rarity stopped in front of her and extended a hoof. “Hello, my name is Rarity, it’s a pleasure to meet you Miss…?”

Stopping short and barely avoiding a chuckle, Gilda smiled wide. “Gilda. Just Gilda is fine.” She bumped Rarity’s hoof with her own, but her smile faltered as a thought occurred to her. “You don’t want to call off the bet now... Do you?”

Rarity laughed outright, turning to the finish line and getting to a crouched position like the one she had at the starting line. “By the princesses, no. We still have a wager to see through.” A sly grin crossed her muzzle. “You haven’t exactly won, yet, even if I am giving you a sporting chance right now.”

A strange sort of relief washed through Gilda, causing her to bleat out a laugh as she took a position next to her. “Wow, what is it with you ponies?”

Rarity swayed and nearly lost her balance. “Pardon?”

Gilda chuckled sheepishly and bumped her shoulder with a hoof. “Don’t worry, it’s a compliment.”

Rarity smiled, but it looked confused. “Thank you then… I suppose.” Her smile brightened and she turned her gaze to the finish, which was now about five hundred or so feet from where they stood. “Would you like to do the honors?”

Nodding, Gilda let out a deep breath. “Whatever happens though, this is it.” She looked at Rarity who had returned to her breathing exercise once more. “Thanks for the ‘sporting chance’, but I don’t usually take freebies like this.”

Rarity gave a nod in response and Gilda pulled her attention to the race ahead.

“Alright,” Gilda began. “On your mark…”

Gilda shuffled her hooves and straightened her posture. She could hear Rarity doing the same and smiled at the unexpected challenge the mare presented. 

“Get set…”

All of the muscles in her legs tensing up for a bolting start, Gilda prepared for another bolting start. A rumbling in her stomach distracted her and her posture faltered.

“Go?” she said with uncertainty, her stomach continuing to complain.

Rarity, not catching on to the confusion in Gilda’s voice, took off the second she heard the final call.

Watching the mare pull ahead, Gilda shook her head and shot off after her. Pouring as much speed into her legs as she could muster, she quickly closed the gap between them and barely pulled back into the lead.

A strong wave of nausea slammed into Gilda and her pace slowed with only a little ways left to go. Rarity’s steady pace ensured that she pulled ahead, but when Gilda tried to retake the lead, another wave hit her.

Gilda could feel the contents of her stomach slosh, and the path started to sway. The gap between Rarity and herself only increased.

Gilda’s gallop slowed to a trot, and then turned into a canter. She was well aware that Rarity had won at this point, but was too busy trying to settle her stomach to care too much. 

Stopping entirely to rub a hoof on her stomach, Gilda watched Rarity as she began bouncing up and down, obviously proud of her victory. Her celebration eventually coming to an end, she started to look around for something, presumably Gilda. Spotting her, Rarity started to trot, then gallop over to her. The original and no doubt happy expression she was wearing now traded for a similar look to when Gilda fell.

“Oh dear… It just isn’t your day,” Rarity observed. “Did you fall again?”

Gilda shook her head, but stopped when she realized it wasn’t doing her any favors. “No, it’s my stomach…”

Sucking in an understanding breath, Rarity sighed. “I suppose we could start over when you’re feeling-”

“No,” Gilda affirmed, stomping a hoof and instantly regretting it. “I mean… It’s my fault. I had a bunch of cupcakes right before the race. I really didn’t expect you to put up such a challenge.” She forced a smile and stood up carefully. "Stopping and suddenly starting that sprint again did me in."

Opening her mouth to object, Gilda was quick to cut Rarity off.

“I mean it,” Gilda went on. “This was a fair race and you won. I told you there was no going back, remember?” She held up a hoof and received a polite bump from her competitor. “Now let’s get back to the others, I want to get Dash’s jokes out of the- hurk!”

Gilda threw a hoof up to her mouth and her face went sickly. Rarity’s eyes widened and she looked unsure of what to do. Before she could even ask if everything was alright, Gilda scampered off the trail and behind a tree.

The sound of Gilda relieving her stomach of its angry contents was enough to make Rarity’s ears flatten against her head.





The trot back to the start went by quickly as Rarity and Gilda spent the time chatting. The topics ranged from apologies for how they met and shifted to stories of their close friends’ misadventures. But most of all, they did everything in their power to ignore or even forget what had taken place behind a certain tree. 

Both of them were gasping for breath over a story Rarity had shared about a beloved doll of Twilight's, and the interesting place she had found it once the spell she cast on it had worn off. It wasn’t until somepony approached them that they even realized they had made it back to the starting line of the race.

“Guys? Hey! Who won?” Dash trotted up, grinning, but gave them both an amused smirk from the merriment they were sharing. Behind her, the other girls all looked on in interest; minus, for some reason, Applejack, who seemed to have vanished.

Gilda and Rarity stared at Twilight, surprised and blinking in tandem. 

Rarity looked down at the painted white line she was standing on. “Are we back already?” she mused to herself, before flashing a smile at Gilda. “Gilda, you are such a nice pony for conversation. You know that?”

Gilda rolled her eyes despite the happy look she shared in. “You’re still trying to get back at me for that jab about your outfit, aren’t you?” She turned her attention to Dash and put on a questioning look. “What do you mean ‘who won?’ Weren’t you all watching… and weren’t you supposed to fly ahead and meet us at the finish to judge the winner?”

A nervous smile covered Rainbow’s muzzle and she let out a sheepish laugh.

Twilight stepped forward with an apologetic look. “I’m sorry girls, but Pinkie came by to-”

An acorn smacked into Twilight’s horn and made her yelp in surprise. Her head jerked in the direction of a rustling bush, eyes narrowed.

Gilda tried to get a look at the bush as well, following Twilight’s glare. But the rustling stopped the moment her eyes fell on it.

Chuckling, Dash stepped forward and patted Twilight on the back. “Sorry Gilda, but poor Twilight here got attacked by squirrels in the middle of your race.” The straight face she was fighting to hold showed signs of cracking. She idly kicked the acorn that had assaulted Twilight and managed to settle on a grin. “The little critters were all over her!”

Twilight huffed indignantly and dropped to her rump. “Rainbow-” The stare she was getting from Dash caused her to sigh defeatedly. “Yeah… squirrels…” 

Spike, who had been sitting on Twilight’s back up to this point, slid off and began laughing at Twilight’s expense. This caused Twilight’s cheeks to redden and she shot a warning look at the baby dragon that was promptly ignored.

Fluttershy let out a gasp and zipped up to Dash’s side. “Rainbow Dash! The squirrels here would never do something like that.”

A flat look on her face, Rainbow turned on her friend. “Fluttershy…” She nodded her head towards Rarity and Gilda, mumbling something to Fluttershy that neither of them could make out.

Letting out a disapproving sound, Fluttershy shook her head and turned to Rarity and Gilda. “I’m really sorry, but we didn’t see who won.” She offered an apologetic smile. “Could you please tell us what happened…? If it’s alright with you, that is.”

Rarity opened her mouth to answer, but Gilda spoke up first. “What happened to Applejack?”

Twilight, Fluttershy, and Rainbow Dash all shared a panicked look at one another.

“Uhh…” Rainbow stuttered and started looking around as if to find an answer just lying on the ground somewhere.

“She’s taking the squirrels to Fluttershy’s cottage!” Twilight blurted out, giving a forced smile that could only come off as awkward.

Fluttershy let out another sigh and shook her head at the ground.

Dash was quick to recover with Twilight’s explanation. “Yep! She… uhh, rounded them up and took them away so Fluttershy could talk to them later.”

Gilda knew when Dash wasn’t telling her the truth, but decided to drop it and get the news of her defeat over with. “Rarity beat me fair and square, she’s a lot faster than I gave her credit for.” She breathed a heavy sigh and evaded her eyes. “You weren’t exaggerating when you said she was obsessed with her figure.”

Rarity shot Dash a questioning glare, to which Rainbow returned with shifting eyes and a sputtering of words that even together didn’t make a coherent sentence.

“So Rarity,” Gilda began, catching Rarity’s attention and giving Rainbow a moment of respite. “What kind of torture do you have planned for me tomorrow?”

A chiding smile overtook Rarity’s features when she turned back to Gilda. “Torture?” she laughed. “Darling, you misunderstand. I plan on treating you to a day you won’t soon forget.”

Gilda raised a brow at the mare, concern eating at the back of her mind. “Uh-huh… And what about tomorrow won’t I be forgetting?”

“Hmm…” Rarity hummed to herself, smiling a little too sneakily for comfort. “Well, I don’t want to spoil all my plans… but I suppose I could tell you this much.” She leaned in close, her smile growing. “I plan on introducing you to a couple of dear friends of mine. Their names are Aloe and Lotus.”

Gilda released a breath she wasn’t aware she had been holding. “That doesn’t sound so bad… What do they do?”

“What a coincidence you would ask! I plan on us meeting them where they work.” Rarity gave a cheerful wink to Twilight, Dash, and Fluttershy. “But I’m afraid that is all I’m telling you on the matter for tonight.”

Resisting the urge to press for more details, Gilda resigned herself to a frustrated sigh. “Fair enough, I guess…” She considered the clue she had gotten and an idea hit her. “Do you think it would be okay if Dash came with? It, uhh… helps to have friends around when I’m dealing with ponies I don’t know…”

Rainbow’s jaw dropped and Rarity’s smile seemed almost malicious. 

“What a wonderful idea,” Rarity agreed. “It won’t be any trouble for you, will it Rainbow Dash?”

Between the return of Rarity’s glare and Gilda’s pleading look, Dash eventually gave a defeated sigh and a nod of consent.

Twilight chuckled and stepped up between Rarity and Gilda. “So it looks like you two are finally getting along.” She looked back and forth between the two of them as they shared a confirming smile. “Great! How about we head over to Sugarcube Corner and celebrate with some cupcakes?”

Rarity and Gilda’s expressions both soured at the mention of more sweets.

“Actually, I think I’m good on cupcakes for a while…” Gilda muttered.

Rarity nodded before adding her own thoughts. “I agree, plus I would appreciate a shower after all of this running.”

Twilight sucked in a panicked breath. “What? Really?” She shot a strangely desperate look to Fluttershy and Dash, who returned it back. “B-But you could still come for tea or…! Or just to relax with everypony!”

Rarity considered it for a moment and then nodded again. “Well, tea would be lovely...” she sighed and grimaced, looking down at herself. “But I would still appreciate cleaning up at home first. Would it be alright if I met up with you all soon?”

Fluttershy smiled widely. “Oh yes, Rarity. That would be quite alright.”

“Then I will see you all soon.” Rarity smiled and trotted off in the direction of Ponyville, leaving Twilight and Rainbow Dash to stare at Gilda pleadingly. Fluttershy just busied herself with staring at an interesting spot on the ground.  

A few moments passed while the staring continued. Gilda let out a frustrated groan when she caught Fluttershy attempting a glance of her own. 

“Fine, I'll go,” Gilda conceded. “Just as long as no one forces any pastries on me.”

Fluttershy let out a squee of approval at the same time Twilight sighed in relief.

Dash let out a chuckle. “Hey, if we run into Pinkie, then no promises.”

Twilight nudged Gilda lightly and trotted ahead. “Well, let’s get going.” The bounce in her step punctuated the excitement in her voice. “I don’t want us to miss out on any of this quality time!”

Confused, but un-phased by her new friends’ antics, Gilda followed close behind. “Sure, why not? It’s not like I have anything else I’d rather be doing right now.” Mulling it over, she really couldn’t think of something she’d rather be up to. She shrugged off the thought and took on a content smile. “I’m sure I could think of something, but nothing really comes to mind.”





“Surprise!”

 A chorus of ponies all shouted greetings and welcomes as Gilda and the others stepped into Sugarcube Corner. The bakery was covered wall to wall in decorations ranging from streamers to balloons. Most of the tables had been removed, except for a few along the walls that were stacked high with a menagerie of desserts and snacks.

The only thing that stopped Gilda from taking flight right then and there was the elastic band she had forgotten to remove from the race... and the wall of ponies standing behind her, blocking the exit. She settled for a surprised yelp and a panicked, wide eyed, look. Dash, Twilight, and Spike fell into some cheery laughter, while Fluttershy seemed as surprised as Gilda was.

From out of the crowd, Pinkie and Applejack trotted up to greet Gilda and the others.

Applejack tipped her hat and chuckled heartily. “I reckon everypony did their part keepin’ this here party a secret.”

Gilda rolled her eyes and shrugged, a small grin on her face. “Yeah you got me… But I think I should have seen this coming…” She slipped the band off her wings and gave them a testing flap before giving Dash an incredulous look. “Squirrels… really, Dash?”

Pinkie bounded forward, a huge grin on her face. “Hi, Gilda! You looked really surprised! I made everypony pinkie promise they wouldn’t tell you about the party and I guess no one slipped up.” She paused in her excited jabbering long enough to shoot a flat look in Twilight’s direction before continuing. “I’m really sorry about missing the race, but I really needed to get everything ready for your big ‘I’ve made up with everypony and we’re all friends now’ party!”

Gilda noded slowly despite barely being able to keep up with Pinkies rambling. “Wait…” A few thoughts clicked together in her head. “You mean you knew me and Rarity would end up being friends?”

Pinkie adopted a goofy look, her eyes crossed and her tongue sticking out. “Well, duh!” She returned to a normal smile after getting her point across. “Why do you think I left when we ran into Rarity earlier?”

“Uhh…” Gilda wasn’t sure how to answer the question, but apparently Pinkie planned on doing that for her.

“To start getting the decorations ready of course!” Pinkie giggled as if the answer was obvious. “I got to work right away! But then you and Dash showed up for cupcakes!” She gasped somewhat dramatically. “I couldn’t let you see the decorations, so I took them down and went to hide back in the kitchen. But you and Dash took soooo long, that by the time you left, I knew there was no way I would finish up and get everypony together in time! So I found Applejack at the race and asked her for help.”

Gilda was getting better at keeping up with Pinkies sugar charged speaking at this point, and was nodding along. “That makes sense,” she lied, still somewhat lost in Pinkie’s train of thought even if she could hear what she was saying. It occurred to Gilda she hadn’t seen Pinkie take a single breath since she began talking. “Pinkie... how are you not out of-”

Suddenly, Pinkie took in a long, exaggerated breath before talking once again. “But, before I could leave, I overheard Twilight and was sure she was going to spoil the surprise. So I thought fast and got her attention like this!” Procuring a random acorn from her mane, Pinkie chucked it at Twilight. The acorn bounced off her horn harmlessly, although, Twilight looked less than amused by the impromptu example. She proceeded to shake her head disapprovingly at Twilight and Gilda wasn’t sure if it was a part of the example, or if Pinkie was still disappointed. “But I guess she did an okay job covering it up because it didn’t look like you knew about the party!”

Twilight let out a groan and trotted off into the crowd of ponies, Spike giggling madly on her back as they went.

Pinkie watched them go with a confused look. “Huh... What’s wrong with Twilight?”

Gilda snorted a laugh. “I think she’s still upset about those squirrels that attacked her back at the race.”

Dash started cracking up with laughter and got a questioning look from Applejack. “I’ll tell you about it later,” she assured her.

Pinkie nodded sagely at Gilda. “Squirrels, huh? They’ll get you every time…”

“I bet you’re dying to know who won.” Gilda baited her with a grin. 

Rarity, as punctual as ever, chose this moment to join her friends. “That would be me.”

Gilda sighed, but the smile on her face didn’t falter. “Way to kill all my fun.”

Rarity fluttered her eyes sarcastically. “Whatever do you mean?”

“Come on you ponies!” Pinkie exclaimed, bouncing on her hooves anxiously. “Let’s party!”

Another cheer arose from everypony, and pony-griffin, present.
> Happy Endings Are Lame
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


Happy Endings Are Lame



“Gyaaaaaaaaww.”

The yawn leaving Gilda’s mouth stretched her cheeks farther than she thought was possible. She felt her jaw pop and her eyes were shut closed. When the yawn died down, she started stretching out her legs one at a time, receiving a satisfying pop from each of them… all except for one.

Gilda kicked her leg at the air vigorously, extenuating each frustrated thrust with an irritated grunt. The action was met with a questioning look from her companion of that morning.

“Is your leg still giving you trouble?” Rainbow Dash asked, giving the limb a sidelong look.

Gilda groaned and stomped her hoof into the dirt. “Yeah… It doesn’t hurt anymore, it’s just…” She rolled her shoulder and scowled down at the joint. “Stiff, like the muscle is balled up.”

Rainbow chuckled and flashed a knowing smile. “I wouldn’t worry about that too much… Not with where we're going.”

Gilda rolled her eyes at Dash. “Again with the hints…” She shook her head and turned to the door they had been loitering in front of for the last ten minutes. “How much longer is Rarity going to take?”

The two mares were sitting out in front of Ponyville’s Carousel Boutique, Rarity’s place of business. They had been there for a short while already, but when they had attempted to enter, they were stopped by the resident fashionista and asked to wait for her outside. Apparently, Rarity had been tasked with playing host to her sister and her two friends for the evening prior, and was working to clean up a mess. And a very big one if her disheveled mane and manic look had been any indication.

Needless to say, neither Gilda or Dash was about to object to the stir crazy mare. Especially with the unsettling twitch in her eye and the long suffering smile she wore even as the sound of breaking glass echoed out of her home.

Gilda harrumphed and trotted in front of the door. “I’m going in, I’m gonna go nuts if I just sit out here.”

Dash wore a flat look, but didn’t make a move to stop her. “Rarity said she was taking care of Sweetie Belle and her friends. Knowing those fillies… That has ‘bad idea’ written all over it.”

Gilda rolled her eyes while pushing against the door with her hoof. “Geez, Dash, they’re just-”

“CUTIE MARK CRUSADERS: GAZEBO BUILDERS!”

No sooner had the door swung open than Gilda was assaulted with a shrieking wall of sound and three stampeding fillies. The noise alone was enough to set her off, and she took to the air, just barely avoiding the overhang of the Boutique and the rampaging trio.

Gilda could hear Dash laughing her tail off from just below her and decided it was safe enough to return to the ground again. “What the heck was that!?” she yelled in bewilderment. “And what does it have to do with a gazebo?”

Rainbow shrugged, an obnoxious smile still plastered to her muzzle. “That...” She pointed a hoof in the direction the fillies had gone. “Would be the ‘Cutie Mark Crusaders’.”

Gilda continued staring at Rainbow expectantly. “And they are…?”

Dash chuckled and motioned her hoof theatrically. “Depends on who you talk to. The answers go from enthusiastic fillies, all the way to hazards on hooves.”

Gilda nodded along, but then tilted her head it to the side. “And what was that about a gazebo?”

“I believe I can answer that question,” Rarity chimed in as she stepped out of the door before locking it behind her. “Applejack’s brother is building a new gazebo for Sweet Apple Acres. The old one burned down you see… There was an unfortunate incident involving a catapult and a staggering amount of fireworks.”

Gilda’s eyes widened, and she shot Dash a questioning look. “Don’t tell me… them?” The snickering she received was confirmation enough.

“Shall we get going?” Rarity asked, already leading the way. “If we leave now, we can have breakfast and then meet Aloe and Lotus before noon.”

Gilda nodded in agreement while she kept pace with Rarity. “Sounds good to me, I’m starving.” Her stomach echoed the sentiment.

Rainbow laughed and Rarity offered Gilda an understanding smile.

The three of them settled on eating at the same cafe they had met at the day before, happily enjoying the food that they ordered. It wasn’t long until a fourth member of the group appeared.

Pinkie Pie came bounding around a corner, her usual wide smile beaming at the three of them. She zeroed in on the group and plopped down into a seated position between Gilda and Dash. 

“Hi Gilda! Hi Dash! Hi Rarity!” Pinkie exclaimed, giving them each a smile as she spoke their name. “How are you girls doing? Didja like the party last night?”

A round of happy nods were the only responses until Gilda managed to swallow what was left of her sandwich. 

Gilda took a quick sip of her water before she spoke. “It was okay,” She said nonchalantly before breaking into a wide smirk. “For a pony party.”

Pinkie scooted closer to Gilda and and narrowed her eyes scrutinizingly. “Are you suggesting you’ve had a better party than a Pinkie Pie party!?” 

Gilda chuckled and poked Pinkie’s side. “I’ll tell you what, when I’m back to normal, I’ll show you how a Griffin has a good time!”

“Hmm...” Pinkie hummed thoughtfully, not breaking her stare. She broke it after a few tense moments, returning to her usual wide smile. “Sounds like fun! And next time, I can throw an even better party!”

Gilda laughed and rolled her eyes. “We’ll see about that…” She paused for a moment, remembering why she was in Ponyville to begin with. “I would really like to go back to normal soon.”

“Oh yes,” Rarity chimed in. “While we’re on the subject, Gilda, how are things progressing with your… situation?”

Gilda shrugged and sighed dishearteningly, still holding a wan smile. “I went to see Twilight again after I left the party last night, but she wasn’t able to find out a whole lot.” Her smile grew by just a hair. “She’s convinced she’s seen my problem somewhere before and just can’t remember what it is exactly. It was kind of funny seeing her bug out about it… for a while.”

Shaking her head free of the image of the frantic unicorn, Gilda chuckled. “If you ask me, this whole situation is like one huge, bad joke…”

Rarity cocked an eyebrow at Gilda. “Perhaps, but you do make a marvelous mare, Gilda.” She quickly turned away from Gilda’s glare and addressed Pinkie. “Pinkie, dear, would you like to accompany us today?”

Pinkie nodded enthusiastically. “Sure, where are we going?”

Rarity nodded her head towards Gilda in a warning manner before speaking. “We are going to see our friends Aloe and Lotus for a relaxing afternoon.”

Pinkie looked between Rarity and Gilda before bursting into a torrent of giggles. “Ooooh, sure Rarity, that sounds like fun!”

Gilda looked at Rarity and Pinkie, who were all smiles. And then at Dash, who appeared torn between laughing at some unseen joke, or running from some unknown threat. 

Gilda decided enough was enough. “Alright, ha ha. Very funny,” she fumed half-heartedly at Rarity. “Look, I lost the bet fair and square. I get that you have something planned, now why don’t you just tell me already?”

Rarity didn’t respond right away. She instead took a hoof full of bits and placed them on the table alongside a small gemstone. Rising from her seat, she cantered around the table and pointed to a building in Gilda’s line of sight from where they sat. “I believe that should answer your question.”

A thud resounded from the table where Gilda’s head whumped down onto it. “How did I not see that coming…”

Just down the road stood a white building with a purple tent top roof. A sign on its front displayed a white coated mare with a flowing mane and tail. Without a doubt, it was Ponyville Spa. 

Rarity set off towards the spa with Pinkie and Rainbow in tow. Gilda slowly followed behind, a defeated look on her face that everypony ignored except Dash, who was wearing about the same look.

“So, Pinkie,” Rarity spoke up to try and distract herself from the pity party taking up the rear of the group. “Perhaps you could get a trim.”

Pinkie tilted her head and averted her eyes. “What do you mean?”

Rarity tsked at Pinkie disappointedly. “Come now, Pinkie. You can’t put it off forever.”

“Hmm…” Pinkie hummed to herself in a look of mock consideration. “Nope, no idea what you mean!” She pulled ahead of the group with a carefree smile and a bounce in her step.

Rarity sighed, but decided against pressing the matter any further. Instead, she slowed her own pace to match Gilda’s. “Cheer up, it won’t be that bad. This is only meant to help you relax and refresh you.” She nudged Dash in an attempt to gain support. “I promise you’ll feel absolutely splendid after yesterday. Just ask Rainbow Dash!”

Gilda looked to Dash for some semblance of assurance. To Rainbow’s credit, her hesitant smile looked genuine.

“Yeah, it’s… I mean, the spa can be...” Rainbow trailed off, racking her brain for something to say that could convince Gilda. She eventually shrugged. “I got nothing.”

“Thank you, Rainbow Dash,” Gilda and Rarity said in tandem.

Gilda cocked an eyebrow at Rarity, who smiled innocently. “It’s fine, I was prepared for whatever you had in store when I lost the race.”

“And that is quite noble of you, dear.” Rarity commended her as they came up to the front door of the spa. “But if you would just give it a chance, I’m sure you would like it. When I first started my runs, the massages there were like a blessing for sore muscles.”

Gilda perked up at the mention of sore muscles. “You don’t say…” She was about to ask something when Dash hurried along the other side of her and began whispering in a hushed tone.

“Don’t fall for it, that’s just about the same line she used to sucker me,” Dash hissed quietly.

“Really, Rainbow Dash?” Rarity chided, obviously overhearing Dash’s joke. She pushed open the door and hurried everypony inside. “Honestly, all I wanted was to help Gilda relax! This isn’t even the bad part of what I have in store for today…”

Gilda was too busy looking around the room to hear Rarity’s last comment. “What was that, Rarity?”

Rarity hummed in feigned acknowledgement, but didn’t otherwise answer Gilda. “Lotus!” she called, and was pleased when a blue mare with pink hair poked her smiling face into the lobby. “Hello! We’re here for that last minute appointment I set up yesterday!”

“Rarity, welcome,” Lotus Blossom greeted warmly. “And oh my goodness. These are your surprise guests? Is that Rainbow Dash again? We haven’t seen you in ages!”

Dash offered a sheepish smile and bobbed her head agreeably. “Yeah, It’s been so long… hehe.” She shuffled her hooves nervously and avoided eye contact with the spa mare. Her eyes darted this way and that, almost as if she expected to find somepony watching her.

Aloe stepped into the lobby then, a warm smile on the pink mare with the blue mane’s face as she inspected the spa’s latest visitors. “I thought I heard our best customer in here!” she beamed at Rarity and then everypony else in turn. “Treating a few friends again, I see. And we have a brand new face! ”

“Yes, this is Gilda,” Rarity introduced Gilda to the two mares. “We’ve recently become better acquainted, so I was hoping to treat her to the usual from when I first started my morning routines.” 

“Ah,” Lotus nodded in understanding. “So that would be a massage, hooficure, and herbal soak if I remember correctly,” she listed off while rubbing her chin in thought.

“Yes, that’s the one,” Rarity confirmed. “It should just be the four of us, if you don’t mind.”

“Not at all!” Aloe chirped. “I’ll see to it that everything's ready to go for after the massage.” She turned back and poked her head through a doorway into the spa proper. "Hans! Can you get a fresh spa bath going!"

In answer came a deep, rumbling voice. "Vat?"

Aloe clearly slumped and sighed in the door, then yelled again, louder this time. “The bath!” 

She took a step back into the room, and turned back to Rarity with an apologetic smile. “Sorry, Miss Rarity. I’m going to have to handle this, Hans is new… and doesn’t speak Equestrian very well…”

Aloe trotted off back into the spa, attempting to speak in a language nopony present quite understood. Except maybe her sister, Lotus, who winced at the mangled attempt at fluent Germane.

“Well then,” Lotus spoke up to recapture everypony’s attention. “Anything else before we get started?”

"Oh oh!" Pinkie’s hoof shot up before Lotus could finish her question, her eyes glued to a crystal bowl of sweets sitting on the front desk.

Lotus stifled a chuckle, knowing full well what Pinkie was after. “Yes Pinkie, these candies are complimentary. You can help yourself.” She looked across the faces of everypony else for a moment. “If that’s it, then all I ask is a moment while I prepare a few things. This will only take a moment and then we'll be right with you.”

Lotus trotted into the back where her sister had gone. Within moments, Pinkie descended on the unsuspecting bowl of candy on the counter, voicing her happiness as she gobbled down the morsels. Gilda and Dash watched her with varying levels of amusement while Rarity flinched back in shock.

This continued on for less than a minute, Pinkie having devoured every last sweet and now reveling in her enjoyment with a satisfied look. She noticed the stares she was receiving from the others and shrugged defensively. “What? She said I could help myself.”

Rarity let out a seemingly weighted breath. “Well, yes Pinkie, she did, but you’re not supposed to-” She was interrupted by an announcement.

Lotus chose then to walk back into the room, four steaming towels balanced on her back. “Alright, each of you take a towel and go on back to…” She immediately took note of the now empty bowl on the counter, before proceeding to raise an eyebrow at the pink mare whose muzzle was now covered in candy-bits.

Pinkie met Lotus’ gaze and fell silent for a moment. But only a moment. Her expression flattened and she wiped her face with a hoof. “You took too long…” she said coolly, backing up to the door as she spoke, “Now your candy's gone.” 

Pinkie bumped the door open, continuing to back away at a steady pace. “That’s what happened…” She whispered the last part, and continued out until the door closed on its own. 

When it was fully shut, Rarity, Gilda, Rainbow Dash, and Lotus could hear the sound of Pinkie’s galloping hooves race away from the spa.

Everypony stared at the door of the spa quietly, unsure what to make of what just happened, or if Pinkie was going to come back. When nearly a minute had passed, Rarity broke the wordless silence.

“I suppose we will only need three of those towels now,” Rarity commented starkly. 

Lotus nodded a fraction, then bumped one of the towels onto the counter before stepping forward for the three remaining mares to take one each. “I do believe you’re right.” She laughed and shook her head. “She didn’t have to leave, it’s not the first time she’s done this. I even keep extra candy under the counter just in case she comes by.”

Rarity rolled her eyes and frowned at one corner of her mouth. “Oh I highly doubt that’s why she left. I think she’s been putting off getting a manecut for some time now, is all.”

Lotus oohed in understanding, then snickered. “I see. Well then, if you’ll all just follow me!”

Leading the way for her customers, Lotus entered the main area of the spa and over to a row of massage beds. She then instructed the three mares to climb on and assisted in laying their towels over their backs.

Gilda and Dash wore begrudging looks, but did as they were told. Gilda, because she was a griffon of her word, and Dash, because she had in all honesty suffered through the spa for less than, say, helping out her old flight-school buddy.

Aloe came along once everypony was in position. “Are we getting started?” she asked, getting into position beside Lotus, who seemed unsure of who to start on first.

Lotus sighed. “I’m sorry, but it seems one of you will have to wait until the other two are finished.”

Rarity made a surprised sound. “How silly of me to forget. You can take care of Rainbow Dash and Gilda first, I can wait,” she assured them. 

Gilda laid there apprehensively as Aloe came up beside her. The mare’s confident smile did little to ease her anxiety. 

Aloe picked up on her customer’s worry, and decided to try striking a conversation to ease the tension. “You’re new to Ponyville, aren’t you?” She began getting started on Gilda’s back.

Gilda, immediately, felt a small pop. Where Aloe kneaded a bundle of muscles on her back came a wave of relief. 

Her eyes scrunched shut on reflex. “Oooh... I mean, yes!” she corrected herself quickly and attempted a tone of normalcy. “I mean, I’ve been in town a few times before, but this time is a bit… complicated?” She frowned at the floor.

“Go on,” Aloe encouraged her as she busied herself with the job of loosening stiff muscles. Her brow furrowed in concentration when she came upon a particularly knotted cluster.

Gilda tensed up at first, the pressure on the balled up nerves causing a flare of pain that she hadn’t been prepared for. Her leg felt as bad as when it first started acting up… at first. After some kneading, the masseuse changed gears, which quickly eased Gilda’s joint.

She hadn’t been ready for it. 

“Whoa!” Gilda exclaimed.

The realization of what Aloe had just done struck her as she straightened, her leg feeling better than it had in what felt like years. 

“Wow,” Gilda turned her leg over in the air. “How did you- Huh, not bad. This feels great.”

Aloe smirked and tapped the bed with a hoof. “I would hope so, it’s been a while since I’ve seen somepony with knots like those. And I’m just getting started.” She snickered. “I’m guessing you have a lot in common with Miss Dash, hm?”

Getting back to work, Aloe noted Gilda’s anxiety had already melted away.

“If you mean that we both enjoy a physical challenge and tend to steer clear of places like this, you’re right on the bits.” Gilda trailed off and let the mare do her work. She felt total bliss as years of abuse to her body seemed to evaporate under the professional’s magic hooves.

“I see, you two must be close friends then,” Aloe suddenly spoke up and reminded Gilda that she was in the presence of others. “So what about your visit is so complicated?” she asked, enticing Gilda to continue talking.

Gilda snorted, then sighed contently. “Well... I doubt you would believe me if I told you.” 

“That doesn’t mean I won’t listen,” Aloe assured her.

Gilda considered this for a moment, humming thoughtfully with her eyes closed. “Nah,” she muttered after a moment. “No offense, but I think I’d rather just lay here and relax. Talking about it isn’t really all that great, you know?”

Aloe smirked. “Fair enough,” she consented, and continued on quietly.

Minutes flew by as Aloe worked. She finished on Gilda soon enough, and paused only long enough to inform her she was getting started on Rarity. 

Gilda barely acknowledged Aloe’s comment as she slipped in and out of her calm daze. She managed to drift off completely only to be nudged back awake by Rarity in what seemed like no time at all.

“Dear, it’s time for the hooficures,” Rarity urged Gilda from her nap.

“Huh…?” Gilda responded blearily at first. “Oh, you’re done already?”

Dash popped up beside Rarity, an amused grin on her face. “Yeah, Gilda, we are. You sure enjoyed yourself for somepony that would ‘never be caught dead’ in a place like this.”

Gilda grumbled before sliding off the bed. “Not now, Dash. I’m feeling way too good for you to kill this mood.”

“Excellent!” Rarity chirped. “Now let’s get our hooves done.”

Gilda gave Rarity a wary look. “Do I have to remind you that I’m not walking around on these things by choice?” She picked up one of the appendages and gave it a mean look. “I’d like to skip any pampering that has to do with them, thanks.” 

“Oh no you don’t,” Rarity said sternly, her brow furrowed in a commanding look. “I already went to the trouble of getting a smaller package than normal in consideration of your discomfort for such events.” She put on a warm smile and a more jovial tone. “Besides, if I let you out of it, then Rainbow will think she can just leave, too.”

Dash seemed offended at first, but eventually shrugged, despite the comment. “She’s probably right, there.”

“Alright,” Gilda sighed. “But it doesn’t mean I have to enjoy it…” She proceeded to move to the next area, where Aloe and Lotus were waiting patiently to take care of their customer’s needs.

Gilda was able to sit through the brunt of the hooficure with little squirming and no real complaints. She struggled once or twice when Lotus had to bore out a rock or two that had been wedged into her hoof, but other then that she did little to complain. Most of that had a good deal to do with the newly found respect she had for Aloe, Lotus and their job. 

When everything was said and done, Gilda was shocked at the difference it made in something as simple as standing up. “To think, you ponies deal with these things your whole lives…”

Dash was stretching out and giving her hooves a few satisfied taps against the ground. “They’re not so bad when you’ve had them your whole life,” she replied nonchalantly. 

“I guess…” Gilda muttered.

“You two could go on to the spa bath if you would like,” Aloe suggested, gesturing a hoof towards a steaming pool. “It is now warmed and ready for you.”

“Oh yes, you girls go on without me, I’ll be along once my hooves are finished,” Rarity added in, admiring the shine of one of her newly polished hooves. 

Gilda looked in the direction of the large tub in question. “A bath?”  She could see the steam and from the water and felt a shiver go down her spine. “I think I’ll pass, thanks.”

Rarity quirked an eyebrow at Gilda. “But it’s a special herbal bath! You’ll love it, and besides, we already agreed-”

Dash interjected quickly, realization on her face. “I can’t believe I forgot that you hate water.”

Gilda groaned and shook her head distastefully at the tub. “Really, Dash? You're just now remembering half of who I was?”

Rarity seemed to come to the same understanding at that moment. “Oh, right. Griffons are half lion aren’t they? I suppose you might have a similar distaste for bathes the same as my dear wittle kitty cat, Opal-” she cut off in the middle of her cutesy description of her pet, as Gilda’s expression had slowly deepened into a frown. 

“Ahem…” Rarity cleared her throat and regained her usual composure. “As much as it might irritate you to remember, you aren’t quite your old self, Gilda.” She put on a knowing smile despite Gilda’s deepening glare. “And I’m not just talking about your body. From what I’ve heard, you’ve changed quite a bit from your last visit. Why don’t you give the bath a try? You might be surprised to find it feels different than you remember.”

“Well, it’s not like I have a choice-” Gilda’s narrow gaze continued until Dash caught her off-guard by jabbing her in the side with one hoof. 

“Come on, Gilda,” Dash urged her. “Rarity’s right. Besides, the baths here feel great! Trust-”

Gilda and Rarity were staring at Dash dubiously. The two of them surprised to hear such praise about something from the spa coming from the mare almost as adamant on avoiding it as Gilda was. 

“Uhh…” Rainbow mumbled, shrinking back from the stares and realizing what she had just done. “I mean…”

“Rainbow Dash,” Rarity began with a mirthful expression and a questioning tone. “Am I to presume you’ve been coming here without me? All on your own?”

Gilda still just stared, her mouth slightly agape. “Dash…?” 

“See ya in the tub!” Dash spat out before zipping off to the tub and and immediately jumping in. 

Gilda looked over to Aloe, hoping to gain some insight as to how much of the implications could be taken seriously. But much to the the mares credit, she feigned ignorance of any knowledge on the subject, only offering an innocent shrug. 

Looking back to Rarity, Gilda found her sharing in her confusion. The moment passed and they both devolved into a fit of giggles.

“Alright,” Gilda conceded with a chuckle. “I’ll give it a shot, I guess…”

“That’s the spirit!” Rarity cheered approvingly. “Now go on, I’ll be along when I’m finished.”

Gilda rolled her eyes at Rarity before heading to the tub. Once there, she found Dash in the water with her back to her. Instead of following Dash’s example and jumping in, Gilda stared at the water reluctantly, hesitant to get her fur wet.

“Why is the water green?” Gilda asked timidly, as if the water were toxic.

“It’s just the herbal mix,” Dash responded a bit too quickly. Gilda’s stare caused her to stutter. “Uhh, n-not that I would know or anything… hehe."

Walking up the stairs onto the platform that stood level with the pools edge, Gilda continued her staring contest with the water's surface. She poked it with a hoof timidly and visibly shuddered. “I really don’t think-”

“Oh for the love of Celestia,” Dash groaned in frustration. A mischievous smile flashed across her muzzle before she inhaled deeply and dove under the water.

“Dash?” Gilda called in confusion, searching for Dash’s form beneath the surface but to no avail. “What are you- GAH!”

Rainbow suddenly burst from the water and grappled Gilda’s outstretched hoof, pulling her in before she could react.

Gilda sat underneath the water for a few seconds, processing what had just happened. Wet wet wet wet! The thoughts echoed in her head repeatedly at first, but were soon replaced which a much more powerful thought. Dash is about to wish she hadn’t done that!

After orienting herself, Gilda’s back legs kicked down against the bottom of the deep tub, forcing her upper half to emerge from the water with all the ferocity she could muster. The water splashed away from her as she unfurled her wings in anger, her face a look of complete anger, and her talon pointed at Dash in a show of intimidation. 

“Daaaaaash!” Gilda screamed. “When I get my claws on y-” Her eyes drifted down to the claw she was pointing at her friend. her wings slouched as her thoughts failed to comprehend what she was looking at. “C-Claws?”

Gilda looked up to see Dash wearing an equally perplexed look. Her mouth was hanging open limply. She looked back down at her talon, and then to her other arm which adorned another one. They flexed and stretched experimentally under her scrutiny. As a final test that she wasn’t just seeing things, she brought one of them up to her face to feel for a muzzle. Instead, she found a familiar beak.

“Dash…” Gilda began shakily, hopeful that the water on her face was enough to hide the tears welling up in her eyes. “Please… just please tell me I’m not hallucinating.” She looked to her friend who began shaking her head slowly.

“N-No… I see it too.” Dash stammered as her expression slowly grew into a smile. “Gilda you’re…” She trailed off, as she noticed what the water failed to hide. “Crying?”

“What?” Gilda asked, rubbing her eyes quickly. “No I was just-” 

Back over by Rarity and Aloe, the two mares had jumped when they heard Gilda’s outcry. They could see Gilda standing in the tub, but only her back. Between that and her wet matted fur, they couldn’t tell anything was out of the ordinary beyond the probability that Dash had pulled some kind of prank.

Rarity huffed and rolled her eyes. “I swear, I can’t take those two anywhere…”

Just then, a loud bang echoed into the spa accompanied by the sound of hooves galloping across tile. Lotus could be heard from the front desk, voicing her surprise. Everypony in the room turned to find Twilight panting in the entryway of the spa. Her mane was a disaster and she was wearing a proud smile on her face. 

“I’ve figured it out!” Twilight cried out triumphantly. “Where’s Gilda? I need to ask her if she went anywhere near the Everfree Forest before she left! If I’m right, then she’s dealing with a case of poison-” She stopped in her announcement when she found Gilda standing tall in the tub, and not a pony.

“Joke?” Rainbow offered with a smirk from where she was wading in the tub.

Twilight groaned and sank to the ground. “I go all night without sleep over this and you’re already cured…” She sighed and planted her muzzle against the ground so her words were muffled. “I should have listened to Spike and just gotten some sleep…”

Gilda, grateful for the distraction, reeled in her emotions and jumped out of the tub. “Don’t sweat it, Twilight. I’m still glad you put so much time into helping me out.” 

Aloe finished detailing Rarity’s last hoof and looked over to Gilda’s soaked new form. She blinked a few times while she considered what she was seeing. Instead of a mare, stood what was obviously a griffon. “Am I to assume this is what you meant about your visit?”

Looking over at Aloe and her surprising calm, Gilda shrugged and put on a wan smile. “Yeah, still think you would have believed me?”

Aloe stared back blankly, humming to herself in thought for a moment over the question. “Nope,” she said simply, then backed slowly out of the room.

Twilight got back onto her hooves with a tired smile. “I guess it doesn’t matter then. As long as you’re okay that’s good enough.” She turned to leave, but stopped when Gilda placed a talon on her shoulder.

Meanwhile, Rarity was looking out into the hall, calling after Aloe if she was alright.

“Look,” Gilda started when Twilight turned to face her. “It does mean a lot to me. So if there’s anything I can do to make it up to you, just let me know.” She thought about something else to say, trying to avoid coming off as a big softy. “I think that I got a lot more out of my visit this time than just a cure for… What was that stuff again?”

“Poison joke,” Twilight offered with a stronger smile than before. “It’s a blue flower that grows around the Everfree Forest.” She chuckled as she seemed to recall something. “Anypony that messes with it has a mean joke pulled on them, and I’m speaking from experience.”

Gilda’s eyes widened to the size of dinner plates when she recognized the flowers she was describing. “You mean this all happened because I…” She shook her head quickly, deciding no-one could ever know.

“What was that, Gilda?” Dash asked from just beside her, wrapped up in a towel.

“Nothing, I can’t say I remember anything about some blue flowers...” Gilda lied and averted her eyes. Suddenly reminded of her own soaked fur, she looked back at the trail of water she had made from the tub. “Whoops…”

“That’s quite alright,” Lotus chimed as she stepped in from the other room. “We’ll take care of it...” She trailed off once she got a good look at Gilda. Staring blankly for the briefest of moments, she quickly turned to Twilight with her usual warm smile. “Twilight, is there something wrong with the bath?”

“Nope,” Twilight assured her casually. “Gilda has always been a Griffin. I think she just had an accidental run in with a patch of poison joke.”

“Oh, is that all?” Getting back to work as if nothing were amiss, Lotus hoofed Gilda a large towel in passing before she used another to soak up the trail of water. “You seem to have had a difficult experience lately, so just enjoy your day,” she told Gilda cheerfully.

“You ponies are too nice for your own good. You know that?” Gilda commented with a frown on her beak.

“Maybe, but a little kindness isn’t a bad thing, is it?” Twilight shot back, a smirk on her face.

“No, I guess not,” Gilda conceded. “Anyway, can you think of anything I can do to make up for the trouble I’ve caused?”

“Hmm…” Twilight pondered for a moment. “There might be something actually. Would you be willing to help me write a letter?”

Gilda looked at Twilight a little confused. “A letter, really? That's it?” A short laugh slipped out from her, but she nodded in ascension. “Sure, Twilight. That sounds easy enough.”

“Wonderful!” Twilight clopped her hooves together gleefully. “I’ll come looking for you later tonight then.” She turned to Rarity before asking her a question. “Are you still taking her to the boutique?”

“But of course!” Rarity confirmed. “These recent events have given me a marvelous idea.”

“Wait, the boutique?” Gilda asked dubiously. “But I’m not a pony anymore. You're not still planning on making me try on pony clothes… are you?”

“No, I suppose I can’t do that.” Rarity sighed.

Gilda let out a relieved breath. “Great, because-”

“I have a much better idea in mind!” Rarity beamed brightly, and took a moment to appraise Gilda. “I think you’ll make a wonderful model for my new line of griffin designs!” Her hooves were already spread wide as she sized up her victim's dimensions.

Gilda's jaw dropped open. “...What?”





Gilda was standing stock still while Rarity continued to stitch away at the outfit she was wearing. This outfit made number ten on the list of outfits Rarity had converted to better fit a griffin’s form; with Gilda’s assistance, of course. 

Things had begun simply enough. 

After the spa, Gilda and Rarity had said their goodbyes to Twilight and Rainbow Dash. Dash had to leave so she could get to work on setting up rain clouds for the evening, and Twilight wanted to get back and straighten up the library after the disaster area it had become from her all-nighter research session. Once alone, they headed straight for Rarity’s home to get down to business. All of Gilda’s questions and doubts on what it was they would be doing were put to rest when Rarity pulled out the first dress.

The first, horrible, cloth-made torture dress.

Gilda’s measurements were recorded quickly before hours ticked by from one dress fitting to another. She had gotten through three whole outfits before she started fidgeting and groaning. 

It had gotten so bad around dress five, that Rarity was forced to warn Gilda of the danger of moving too much while she was handling a sewing needle. At outfit number six, Gilda found out that the danger was, in fact, something to be wary of. 

Outfit eight and nine were handled with much greater care by both parties. But when outfit nine was finished, Gilda let her mouth get away from her.

“I can’t believe I’m wearing this…” Gilda muttered indignantly, just loud enough to be overheard. "I'm so tired of this, I'm literally ready to scream."

Rarity chuckled while she plucked away a few stitches that were too restrictive against Gilda’s body. “It’s your own fault,” she informed her. “It was that kind of comment that got you into this position.” 

“Hey! That’s only half true…” Gilda said with a frown.

Rarity raised an eyebrow at her, pausing in her work. “Oh?” 

“Yeah,” Gilda nodded confidently. “There were about a half dozen cupcakes that didn’t want me to win that race.”

Rarity met Gilda’s straight face for a moment before they both began laughing. Rarity was forced to put her tools down because she couldn’t keep her magic focused for much longer.

“Now, to be fair, that was just as much your fault as anything else.” Rarity informed her between giggles.

Gilda choked back her own laughter before she answered. “Yeah, maybe,” she admitted. “But did you have to put me in a maid’s outfit?”

Gilda frowned at the black and white maid’s uniform against the wall that she had been fitted for. She regretted her earlier wise crack about how ridiculous Rarity’s outfits looked.

“Oh, you don’t like this one either?” Rarity asked with mock disappointment. “Well, I am sometimes called upon to make the nurse uniforms for-”

“I think I’m fine, thanks,” Gilda assured her quickly.

The front door of the shop alerted them both to Twilight’s arrival by the sound of its bell. She came trotting in with a pair of saddlebags and a happy smile.

“Good evening, girls!” Twilight greeted them as she approached. 

“Hello, Twi-” Rarity began before Gilda’s greeting drowned her out.

“Oh, thank sun butt. I thought you’d never get here!” Gilda cheered. She began giving Rarity a pleading look.

Rarity held a narrow glare for a few seconds before sighing in defeat. “Fine, I suppose a break is in order…” she relented. But before Gilda could start cheering she added, “But you can’t take the outfit off. I’ll need to put in a few pins to hold it together where I’ve removed the stitching.”

“Fine,” Gilda groaned, while Rarity pinned the outfit together with her magic.

Twilight moved over to Rarity’s work desk and put down her bag. “Rarity,” she called to get her attention. “Would you mind if I used this table?”

“Not at all,” Rarity replied, placing the last pin. “Just be careful moving my sketches aside.”

In no time at all, Twilight cleared away just enough space for her quill and parchment. She dabbed the quill a few times in the ink and scratched out the words: Dear Princess Celestia.

Gilda walked up beside her and gave the paper a glance. “Whoa, is this who we’re writing too?” She received a happy nod in reply. “Why? And why would you need my help?”

Twilight’s smile widened. “It’s simple. Princess Celestia has tasked me with learning all there is to know about the magic of friendship. So, whenever I, or one of my friends, learn something new about it, I write her a letter detailing my findings.” 

Gilda gave her an askance look. “Are you serious?”

“Of course!” Twilight responded, grinning.

“That’s just…” Gilda was about to inform Twilight of how lame it sounded to her, but something about the look on her face gave her pause. A smile worked its way onto her own face once her thoughts settled on something she couldn’t argue with. That just isn’t how you treat your friends.  “You know what, it doesn’t matter. So you think I know something about friendship that’s worth sharing, huh?”

“Well, that’s what I was hoping.” Twilight confirmed. Her head tilted to the side in thought. “With the last year you spent at home, and everything that’s happened in the last couple of days, I thought you might have learned something about friendship. You have been making a few friends since you got back, after all.”

Gilda plopped down next to Twilight and started rubbing the bottom of her beak with her talon. “Maybe,” Gilda mused. “But I don’t know if you’ll want to hear it.”

Twilight gave Gilda a serious look. “Now don’t say that. Of course I want to hear it.”

“You’re sure?” Gilda teased her.

“Yes!” Twilight exclaimed a bit too hastily.

“You got it,” Gilda said with a smirk. “Twilight, you’re an egghead.”

Twilight stared at Gilda for a few seconds. She blinked, trying to think of how that had anything to do with friendship. When she came up empty her eyes narrowed and she was about to retort, but Gilda saw this and held up a talon for her to remain quiet.

“You’re an egghead,” Gilda repeated but this time continued. “You seem really smart, but you spend way too much time with your nose in a book.” She turned until she was making eye contact with Rarity, who was wearing her confusion plainly on her face. “Rarity, you’re a drama queen. You’re great at what you do, that much I know after the last couple of hours, but you overreact to just about everything.”

Gilda let the words hang in the air as she considered what else to add. “And Pinkie is a spaz.”

Twilight’s gaze wasn’t as irritated as before, or as confused. But it did show signs of both. “Thanks for the honesty… I think. But what does this have to-”

“Getting to that,” Gilda cut her off. “My point is that, a year ago, I wouldn’t have given any of you the time a day. And the honest reason for why is, well, I’m a jerk.” She punctuated the last statement with a shrug. “But when I came back to Ponyville in the condition I was in, all of you were so quick to give me a second chance and help me out, even after I treated you all based on those things.”

Rarity let out an uncomfortable cough. “Yes well, what are friends for?”

“Exactly!” Gilda shouted, causing Twilight and Rarity to both jump. “We weren't even friends yet, and I would have never been friends with any of you, yet here I am now.” She pulled at the Maids outfit she was wearing and let out a dry laugh. “If someone had told you a year ago, that I would be back in Ponyville, making friends, would you have taken them seriously?”

“I think I’m starting to get it,” Twilight muttered with her brow scrunched in thought.  “But it would be easier if you would explain.”

“Let me spell it out for you then,” Gilda sighed. “And you had better not laugh.” She took in a deep breath and ordered her thoughts. “I think that friends can come from where you least expect them. Just because you meet someone you don’t get along with right away, doesn’t mean you automatically know everything that matters about them. And, if you’re willing to look past their faults, you might find they're someone you can not only get along with, but that they can be a friend you can depend on.”

Gilda hadn’t noticed Rarity come up behind her until after she was done speaking. She and Twilight were smiling at her with mushy looks. 

Gilda’s eye twitched as they continued to look at her admirably. “Stop that,” she demanded. “You're creeping me out.”

Rarity and Twilight looked at each other and began giggling. 

“Alright,” Twilight said after a while. “I think that’s a great lesson to write to Princess Celestia about.” She dipped her quill once again before she began scribbling across the parchment.

“Cool,” Gilda said and turned to Rarity. “Can I have a glass of- I said stop looking at me like that!”

Another bout of giggles escaped Rarity when the front door chimed again. 

“Hi Gilda!” Pinkie chirped. “I heard from Rainbow Dash that you were all better now, so I came by to…” She trailed off after her eyes landed on Gilda. Her mouth curled up into up into a huge, mirthful grin as tears began welling up in her eyes.

Gilda looked over to see a happy pink pony bouncing into the shop. “How you doing, fuzz-wad?” she greeted. “I was just talking about you.”

Gilda tilted her head at Pinkie in confusion, that is, until she remembered what she was wearing. The thought crossed her mind that Twilight hadn’t once made any comments or jokes about the outfit and she was impressed. But she doubted Pinkie would be as restrained. 

“Pinkie,” Gilda began warningly, her eyes narrowed. “Don’t even think about-”

She snorted once and then Pinkie began to laugh… hard. She seemed to struggle to stay on her hooves as she alternated between giggle-snorts and raucous laughter, all the while tears streamed down her cheeks.

Gilda’s eye twitched as Pinkie continued to bust a gut at her expense. “Stop that!” Gilda bellowed while stomping over to her. 

Pinkie noticed Gilda’s advance and backpedaled at an even pace, still laughing in the most out of control ways.

“If you don’t stop,” Gilda started through her gritted beak. “I’m gonna make you eat that tail of-”

“Pffffffbbbbtttt!”

Pinkie let out a long raspberry, stopping Gilda’s threat cold.

Gilda’s eye twitched again and her face began burning red. “That’s it!” she shouted before lunging for Pinkie.

Rarity shrieked. “Not the dress!” She was ignored.

Pinkie must have seen the attack coming, because she dodged her easily. She took off at a gallop out the front door, Gilda hot on her hooves.

The two of them began a chase around Ponyville nopony would soon forget. And that only had half to do with the fact that there was a rampaging griffin chasing Pinkie around while wearing a fancy outfit.

Rarity watched from the window of her shop and winced at the abuse that Gilda was putting her poor dress through. “Oh dear…” Even from there, she could see the seams pop from where they were held together by mere pins. 

Even after the two of them ran out of sight, Rarity couldn’t help but picture the state that the outfit would be in by the time it was over. She let out a sigh, mumbling, “I suppose this means that we’re done for the day,” and shook her head in disappointment. “I had so hoped to finish a few more…”

Interrupting, Pinkie suddenly came sprinting back into the shop, and went straight for the stand that Gilda had stood on while Rarity worked. 

Gilda came barging in only a moment later, snarling. Her eyes locked on the mare she chased, then began a slow advance, sure that she had Pinkie cornered. “Pinkie… you're dead!”

Twilight groaned. “Girls, please stop! Friends don’t fight like this! Right?”

When Gilda came within arm's reach of Pinkie, ready to grab her and teach her a lesson, she got a surprise.

Pinkie whipped around and fastened something to Gilda’s head. 

Gilda blinked a few times, stunned by the pony’s speed. 

Pinkie’s giggles had finally stopped, but she had a smugly content look on her face that wasn’t much of an improvement. 

“There, that’s much better!” Pinkie chimed spiritedly, giving Gilda an appraising look. “You looked plain silly without the whole ensemble!” Now grinning stupidly again, she pointed a hoof at a mirror standing off to the side.

Gilda looked on reflex at her reflection, and saw a frilly bonnet now on her head. 

Something inside her snapped. 

A river of rage started to fill up Gilda’s chest as she sputtered for something to say, something to yell, something to do. And then it happened. For the first time in a year, Gilda roared. 
	


> [Bonus] Nopony Was Hurt in The Writing of This Letter
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


[Bonus]


Nopony Was Hurt in The Writing of This Letter



Celestia was relaxing in front of the fire in her study; in front of her suspended in a bright magic glow was a steaming fresh cup of tea. She took a long indulgent sip and sighed blissfully as the camomile calmed her nerves and helped her to relax. A quick glance out the window revealed it would still be another hour before she could set her sun and get some rest, so she looked to her bookshelf for some pleasant reading to finish the evening with.

Just before she could get up for a better look at the selection, a wisp of green fire came rolling into the room. It balled up in front of her and deposited a scroll before fading away. 

“Ah, this will do wonderfully,” Celestia mused at the letter’s impeccable timing. “I wonder what Twilight and her friends have been up to this time.” 

Getting into a more comfortable position by the fire, Celestia unfurled the scroll. She took another sip of her tea before she started reading Twilight’s newest letter on friendship.


Dear Princess Celestia,

Today I learned that even though first impressions can be important, they don’t always give you a fair understanding of who you meet. About a year ago, a griffin named Gilda came to Ponyville. She was introduced as an old friend of Rainbow Dash’s from back in flight camp. But Gilda had a problem with getting along with some of the ponies in town, and didn’t leave on a very good note. She even got into a fight with Dash before storming off at her own welcome party.

Two days ago, Gilda came back. But, instead of being a griffin, she showed up as a pony! A pegasus to be specific. As we found out, she had a run in with a patch of poison joke the same day she left the party last year and ended up staying home in the Griffin Kingdom with this problem the whole time. When she came back, it was to look for help from the last pony she could turn to. 

To say she was surprised when both me and Dash agreed to help her any way we could would be an understatement. 

The very next day after she got here, I got to work analyzing what it could have been that caused her to change. I’m sorry to say that I didn’t figure it out right away… But that’s besides the point. After a whole year of being forced to deal with such a sudden change, Gilda was still pretty brash and rude, but she seemed to honestly be trying to get along. She managed to make amends with Fluttershy for roaring at her, get along with Pinkie Pie, regain her friendship with Rainbow Dash, and she even stopped calling me an egghead… until about five minutes ago. 

Gilda and Rarity did butt heads for a little while, but they worked it out through a bit of friendly competition and even gained some respect for one another. 

Once again, first impressions can be important, but that doesn’t mean that they should define how you see somepony. If you look past their flaws and quirks, you could very well find somepony worth taking the time to know. And, as Gilda put it, you might find a friend you can always depend on. 

How wonderful! Pinkie just got here, and- Oh dear… 

I really don’t think Pinkie should be laughing at Gilda like that. 

Oh, good. Now Gilda’s chasing Pinkie. And now Rarity is going to need a new front door for her shop. I’m also pretty sure Carrot Top isn’t going to like what they just did to her stall…

I think I should wrap this up here, Princess, before somepony- Oww. No wonder Fluttershy was terrified! I haven’t heard a roar like that since we ran into the manticore in the Everfree forest! I should really-


Celestia blinked at the letter once, and then twice. She turned it over in her magic looking to see if perhaps it continued on and she had just missed it. When she was certain that was all there was, a bit of worry started to set in. 

“Oh dear…” Celestia got up and moved over to her work desk, ready to send a response to make sure everything was okay. 

Before she could get started, another wisp of green fire flared up before her and dropped a new scroll on her desk.

Celestia blinked in surprise, then hesitantly opened the scroll with her magic. This is going to be one of those days… she thought tiredly.


Dear Princess Celestia,

I’m sorry about sending you an incomplete letter like that. Spike got here just when Gilda roared, and the shock gave him a bad case of the hiccups. He couldn’t control his fire and got just a little too close to the letter when he was asking me what was going on. If I were you, I would duck.

Celestia’s eyes widened, just as a small avalanche of books cascaded out of the air in front of her from a swirl of green flame. Her wings gave a powerful flap, narrowly taking her out of harm’s way.

The book-alanche covered her desk and floor. It was easily two shelf’s worth.

“Not again…” She would have to send the books back one by one so as not to cause the same mess at Twilight’s home. Letting out a sigh, she turned and kept reading on.



So, everything is fine now. Pinkie was able to calm Gilda down by promising her with some free cupcakes at Sugar Cube Corner. So now we’re all going there for sweets. After Applejack helps Gilda repair the damage she caused to Rarity’s door, of course. 

Uggh.

Well, I hope I can write you again soon, Princess.

Your Faithful Student,
Twilight Sparkle



Releasing a breath she hadn’t realised she was holding, Celestia started to relax.

She got up from her desk and only stopped by the fire to put it out with her magic. She didn’t much feel like reading any more that night, and decided that sleep sounded like a much better plan.

She got to her bedroom just as it was time to set the sun. After that, she curled up under the covers with a few of her thoughts to keep her company. 

“If you can get past somepony’s flaws…” Celestia mulled over the idea for a few moments while she stared out into the moonlight drifting through her window. “No no no,” she chuckled to herself about another certain somepony.

Still, the thought persisted. She tossed and turned in her bed for a good hour before she finally came to a decision. 

Celestia let out a sigh. “I suppose it has been a while since I took a walk in the gardens. Maybe I should visit him.” Another few seconds went by and her resolve strengthened. “If he could only meet us half way, I’m sure even Discord is worth another chance.”