pirate life for derpy!
hi im derpy hooves and derpy have the best mummy ever! she loves me and derpy love her and daddy doesnt need to be here. mummy says he be back soon but soon seems so long i no can wait to see him again. guess it just derpy and mummy but thats alright cause mummy is the best! she doesnt let me out much but thats okay derpy cant fly too good anyways.
one time she took derpy to the river and said derpy could float down it to someplace special. mummy only takes me there when she sad but she no say she said derpy just see she sad but thats okay cause derpy know she cant be sad long with derpy here!
mummy bought derpy a boat the day before and put derpy in it before my bath. she said derpy be pirate derpy. rawr! she give me this black thing for my eye and a hat and a sword and even she made my special blanky into a flag! derpy look like real pirate she says. she so special and nice and derpy cant do much for her but thats okay she says so too.
she take me down to the river today and we bring boat with. mummy says i get to see daddy if derpy stay in the boat but she also says he in the water but how that make sense? mummy never taught me how to swim derpy hope daddy can. derpy hope daddy special and love me like derpy love him. derpy knows she loves him even if daddy not here cause derpy loves everypony. not everypony nice to derpy though and derpy dont know why. derpy always nice to them.
derpy make it to river. she help mummy with the boat cause derpy strong like mummy is. derpy got cold but mummy said it wouldnt matter soon. derpy think she got a blanket. mummy put derpy in the boat and told derpy she can be a pirate. yarr! derpy loves to be pirate. she no mean pirate though, pirate derpy helps the ponies cause derpy loves helping even if she no good at it. sometimes derpy mess up and she get hit and yelled at but that okay cause derpy never told to help, derpy just help, it right thing to do but derpy always screw it up and end up sad. derpy no like to be sad, derpy wanna be happy so she smile all the time like mummy. derpy sees mummy cry a lot and that make derpy sad cause derpy love mummy but she come and hug mummy with a real big smile until mummy smile like derpy and everything okay!
derpy and mummy got the boat in the river. she left me bubble blanket! mummy keep me warm like she promised. mummy put pirate hat on derpy now and eye patch. derpy love eye patch. mummy raised pirate flag and put derpy in her pirate ship so she can search all over for her daddy!
mummy push derpy into river and derpy go float. mummy says she always love derpy but derpy know that. mummy says shell be with derpy soon and derpy cant wait. derpy feel all alone without mummy. derpy feel like it too long of wait without mummy but derpy cant wait to see daddy. derpy hope mummy be waiting with him and she know to look around for him so derpy keep spinning around in the boat till she see him. derpy cant wait!
derpy on the river for long time. she stop looking for daddy cause she know he see her sometime soon. derpy just tired of looking for now.
derpy found friend! friend is green and friend jumped into boat with derpy! she give friend eyepatch. friend make sound but he no talk. friend look funny with eye patch but that the pirate life! it all funny to derpy out here. friend stay close to derpy for long time. friend not warm when derpy snuggle with him. friend scaley and slimey and icky but derpy dont care! derpy love friend and friend love derpy! she know it!
boat start to like water. he love the water so he hug it. water get all over derpy hooves but she no care cause she know it just water saying she love derpy!
friend jump out of boat. derpy miss friend. friend took eye patch with him. derpy think he come back but she know he wont. nopony ever come back to derpy except for mummy… oh but daddy coming back now! maybe friend come back later like daddy! derpy wont be mad at friend because derpy cant be mad. derpy sorry for making friend leave. she know she was bad pony and derpy get sad over that.
derpy see town! derpy see town! she no see daddy yet but she see ponies! derpy sees new friends! they look like happy friends. derpy so excited to meet new friends! she still miss old friend but maybe he here? derpy cant wait to hug boat goodbye. derpy want to quit being pirate for a little bit so she can go back to being derpy again.
derpy hit rock. boat no like rock. boat fall apart and hug the water a lot more now. derpy hug water too but now water no like derpy. water hug me too hard and derpy cant hug back. she keep going down and cant breathe. derpy no like it.
derpy wake up. she surrounded by new friends. they funny. they keep asking derpy questions and derpy answer every single one as best as she can like a good girl! some dont make sense but nothing make sense today. derpy just wanna explore and find daddy and mummy and then they all be family again! derpy cant wait! she so excited to be loved again. derpy gonna hug daddy tight and never let him go away again and mummy gonna kiss derpy like she used to then we all go find boat and friend and we be pirates together! derpy cant wait!