A Drunk Princess

by Quixotic

First published

What happens when intoxication brings Princess Luna and one of the only humans in Equestria together? Drunk sex, of course.

Princess Luna empties half the Canterlot wine cellar and decides to investigate a rumor she once heard. Jake is one of two humans living in Equestria, and just might have something to do with said rumor. What happens when intoxication brings the two together? Drunk sex, of course.

Commissioned by Twifan.

"Mushroom"

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“Whew, I’m beat,” Jake mumbled, fumbling with the key to the door. After a moment of fishing it out of his pocket it, he brought it to the lock and it opened with a light click.

“Tell me about it,” a voice said from behind him.

Jake smiled. “I see you’re home on time, Sarah.” He stepped inside and turned around, looking to a young, green-eyed woman with dark hair set in a bun. She had bags under her eyes and slouched a bit, but smiled nonetheless.

“Yeah, yeah, just get inside,” she said, giving Jake a friendly shove as she entered the house. He rolled his eyes and smirked, shutting the door behind them.

“Oh, you two are home!” an excited voice came from deeper in the house. After a clattering of pots and pans, a short clip-clop of hooves found an aquamarine unicorn with golden eyes in front of them. “Dinner’s almost ready. You like vegetable stew, right?”

“After almost a year of eating it I do,” Jake said, with a chuckle.

Sarah nudged him in the side. “Don’t mind Jake, here. I’ve always been a vegetarian, so I love the stuff.” She winked to the unicorn, prompting a giggle.

“Well get in the kitchen if you want it!” she chirped, turning around and trotting away. The two humans followed both her and the smell of food.

As they entered, Jake sniffed the air. “Mmm, that’s starting to seem better! You sure to know how to put a meal together, Lyra.”

Lyra gave a little laugh as she hovered over the pot and stirred the contents within. To her side, a knife floated in the air and was dicing up a carrot.

“Wish I had magic for the bakery,” Sarah said, crossing her arms and watching the golden aura work the knife. “Who knows how many batches of muffins or cupcakes I could get done.”

“True, but you have those hands, don’t you?” Lyra asked, continuing to focus on the stew. “I bet those make certain things way easier. Not only that, but you’re way taller than the normal pony.”

Jake pulled aside a chair, a rickety old thing that looked like it might collapse at any moment. “She’s right, you know,” he said, looking to Sarah. “Here, our hands are just about everything. You know how many times Applejack drops something that I need to go and pick up? Between picking it up with her mouth or having me get it with my hands, it’s always gonna be the hands.” For emphasis, he raised his hands and wiggled his fingers.

Sarah chuckled and leaned against the counter. “Okay, I guess we have an advantage there.”

Lyra tapped the wooden spoon against the edge of the pot and looked down at the flames, adjusting their height with extreme precision. Once she was satisfied, she stepped down from the stove and looked to Jake and Sarah. “So, how were your days?”

Jake yawned. “Mostly construction team work today. Helped layout the foundation for a new building and handled some of the more detailed stuff. Pretty standard work. It’s rewarding in the end, but man does it tire me out now.” He finished with a laugh.

“Well, you two both know how it is,” Sarah said, moving to the sink and washing her hands. “No two days are the same with Pinkie Pie in charge. Today we had to do some wedding cakes while also making cupcakes for some kids’ party at the same time. I’ll let you guess how many times Pinkie mixed up the frostings.”

Lyra and Jake both gave knowing nods. Lyra glanced to the pot and turned off the heat, then leaned on the counter to check inside.

“What about you, Lyra?” Sarah asked.

“Oh, huh?” Lyra looked from the pot to Sarah and then back the pot, as if she wasn’t expecting the question. “Uh, pretty normal stuff today,” she started, stirring the stew. “Did some shopping and met Bon Bon at candy store again.”

“Yeah? How’s that going?” Jake asked, propping his head against his hand.

Lyra blushed, looking away from Jake. “It’s, uh… I mean… Well you know, you don’t want to know about my boring love life. Let’s eat!” She quickly took the pot off the stove and brought it to the table, floating three bowls and spoons along with her.

Sarah rolled her eyes and followed Lyra to the table, sitting down in another of the specially designed chairs. It groaned as she settled into it, prompting Lyra to frown and look towards the shoddy wood.

“I’m really sorry about those,” she said, pouring soup in their bowls. “I keep meaning to go look for something better.”

Jake waved a dismissive hand. “Don’t worry about it. I’ll take care of it eventually. I’m sure I can use some elbow grease and come up with something.” He then picked up his spoon, almost comically undersized, and dipped it into the soup bowl.

Sarah rocked from side to side in her chair, getting more squeaks out of it. “On second thought, I think we’ve gotten used to these by now.” All three of them laughed, then began to eat.

“Hey, this ain’t half bad, Lyra,” Jake said, taking another spoonful. “I could get used to this!” After another bite, he got a sudden look of surprise. Leaning back, he showed some mock distress. “What has Equestria done to me?”

“It’s better for you than anything on Earth, that’s for sure,” Sarah said, sipping her own stew. “I wonder how much healthier you’ve gotten since we came here?”

“I still can’t believe the only two humans in Equestria are in my house. Me, Lyra Heartstrings.” She looked up to them. “It’s an honor, really.”

Jake chuckled. “You know we’ve been living here for almost a year, right? How can you still be surprised?”

“It’s just… I don’t know,” Lyra said, picking at her food. After a few moments, she frowned. “You think you’ll ever get back?”

Sarah only shrugged. “Who knows?” She glanced outside, watching the evening sun setting past the horizon. “All things considered… I’ve come to like it here.”

Lyra’s smile came back. “Well, that’s a good thing then, right? If you’re happy here and all, that’s… that’s good.”

Jake nodded, and the three of them continued eating their dinner.

~

Princess Luna stomped through the dark, horn lit up to illuminate her path. Canterlot Castle’s wine cellar was usually vacant, but not tonight. The alicorn stormed through it and mumbled to herself, glancing to the casks on either side of her as she did so.

“Constant, constant demands,” she grumbled, her hooves echoing off the dank walls. She paused and put a hoof to her chest, imitating her numerous subjects with a faux accent. “Oh, Luna, make sure there’s a full moon next week! Oh, Luna, please make my evening honeymoon perfect! Oh, Luna, make Nightmare Night extra long this week!” She then scoffed and scowled. “I cannot take these constant, trite demands! Is this what my sister has reduced the royal family to?”

She continued walking forward, as did her rant. “And Celestia… oh, Celestia…” she said, lowering her head and gritting her teeth. “Not once have you taken your eye off me. Not once. You do not trust me. You never have. I bet you have spies everywhere, watching my every move, seeing if I am to plan another rebellion.”

Luna turned and approached a large cask, then caressed the front of it with a hoof. “But not down, here, no. Not down here. Here, it is just I and our lovely cache of wine.” She had the faintest hint of a smile, but it all but vanished once she read the name of the particular wine she was at.

‘Nighttime Bliss’ she mouthed, then pouted. “Of course, the world never forgets to remind that I represent the least important time of day.” She stepped away, dropping her head low and walking slowly. “Just once, I wish I had more than one night a year to be loved. Just once, I wish I could go out and see all of my adoring subjects. And just once… I want to truly be happy.”

She looked to her right, observing the large racks of wine bottles stacked up and organized. There must have been hundreds, if not thousands of them, populating the vast cellar. If there was one thing the castle didn’t skimp on, it was their wine. “Perhaps… perhaps the bottle will help,” Luna said, grabbing one from the rack. “I have not drank much in the past… but there’s never a bad time to start.”

Luna effortlessly popped the cork off, and without a second thought, she brought it to her lips. “...to the night,” she whispered, tipping the bottle back. In one long gulp, she downed its entire contents. Realizing it was empty, she haphazardly tossed it aside, where it shattered on the stone floor.

“Hmm… I feel nothing.” Luna took another bottle and repeated the process. “Does my alicorn stature require me to drink more than normal?” she wondered, grabbing yet another bottle. With a soft smile, she brought the tip of the next one to her lips. “I suppose we shall see.”

After an unknown amount of time, Luna found herself slumped against the cold wall of the cellar, half-empty wine bottle next to her. A trail of broken bottles and completely drained casks lead from the middle of the cellar all the way to her, but she wouldn’t have known. Luna was too busy babbling incoherently and twitching.

“A-And that’s why… the republic should rise up… i-immediately!” she said, to the half-empty bottle next to her. “But w-who would support me?” she asked. “Oh, oh, the dragons, d-definitely. Why didn’t I think of that? Dragons would love me… a-and… the… buffalo?” She paused, contemplating her choice of ally.

“No, wait, I-I got it!” She stumbled to her hooves, leaning against the wall for support. “I’ll get… I’ll get those two hubers… humies… no, humans to do it! A-and I’ll open a portal and get more of them to help. Yes!” She laughed, hiccuping a few times in between. “And then the night… w-will truly… last… forever!” The laugh turned into a cackle, but was quickly interrupted as she slipped and fell to the ground with a crash.

She attempted to push herself back up, but started laughing midway and fell. “Stars above, those humans! T-Those humans are a riot. I can’t believe the rumors about them.” After another try, she pushed herself to her hooves and leaned into the wall. “M-Mushrooms in their pants, some peasant claimed. Ha! What a reason for them to wear pants!”

Luna began taking wobbly steps forward, but lost her footing and tripped right into a once-full cask of wine. She held it dearly, trying not to fall. “Wait… w-what if the rumor is true though?” She asked, worry coming over her. “Perhaps I s-should look into this.” She stabilized herself, then mulled it over for a moment.

With a hoof thrust in the air, she announced to the empty cellar, “Yes! For the g-good of ponykind, I will investigate t-the rumor of these hub… hup… humans! I know exactly where they live, so l-let the studies… begin!”

Using what agility and grace she could muster, Luna navigated over broken bottles, pools of wine, and even the occasional tipped cask. She succeeded in getting out of the cellar, and once that was over, she merely searched for the nearest window and jumped out, making a flight to Ponyville that was sure to make any passenger nauseous.

~

The moon hung brightly in the sky, shining its rays into Jake’s room. It was a commonly sized room, with one major change. The bed was much larger than one typical for a pony. Similar to the chairs downstairs, the bed seemed shoddy and hastily put together, but it managed to work. Perhaps one day soon, Jake would look into building better ones for both him and Sarah.

Until then, he snored peacefully under his covers. His breaths were long and rhythmic, and thankfully for the other two occupants of the house, fairly silent. Once or twice he shifted under the covers, but his long work days generally put him in a deep rest with few interruptions.

This night proved to be different. Jake’s eyes shot open as he heard something in his room. Without moving, he glanced to his sides and found nothing. Focusing on the noise, he found it to sound like bedsheets rustling. Almost immediately after realizing what it was, he felt something touching him under the sheets. More specifically, it was pulling down his underwear.

Jake froze, and carefully pushed himself up. Sure enough, the covers in front of him were bouncing and bobbing as whatever was under them did whatever it was doing.

“Mushroom… down here somewhere…” the thing mumbled, just barely audible through the sheets and the slurring.

Looking over to the window, he found it was wide open. Slowly, he looked back to the covers. He reached his hand over them and took hold of the fabric, unsure of what he was about to find over them. Taking a breath, he tossed the covers to the side to reveal the stranger in his bed.

Jake wasn’t sure what surprised him more: the fact that there was a mysterious pony in his bed or the fact that the pony was toying with his penis. She didn’t seem to notice the absence of covers as she giggled and bounced the organ between her hooves. Once or twice, she mumbled about ‘the mushroom,’ or something to that measure.

That was when Jake heard footsteps coming down the hall, and before he could even fully turn his head to the door, the Sarah was in the doorway and the lights were on.

“I heard this loud noise come from your room and thought I’d—” She froze as she noticed what was going on in the bed. Her eyes darted between Jake and the pony, the former of which just shrugged and shook his head. Before she could ask, the pony on the bed threw one of her hooves in the air and backed up.

“I have solved the mystery!” she yelled, with a big smile on her face.

Neither Jake nor Sarah were sure of how to respond to the new proclamation. They merely exchanged worried glances as the pony slid off the bed and took a shaky stance. Once she was situated, she made another statement. “I am hungry.” Turning towards the door, she took a wobbling walk towards Sarah and easily slid past her, paying no mind to either of the humans in the room.

They heard her walking down the hallway, then descend downstairs. Her hoofsteps faded off after that. Once there was silence again, Sarah turned to Jake and frowned. “What the hell was that?”

“I… I don’t know,” Jake said, pulling his underwear back up. “I woke up and she was just… down there… doing stuff.”

“Normally I wouldn’t believe you,” Sarah began, putting her hands on her hips, “but did you smell her? She’s been hitting the bottle, and pretty hard.”

“Yeah, I noticed it when I pulled the sheets off. I’ve never seen her before, though. Why is she here?” He turned and rested his feet on the ground, then stood up.

Sarah shook her head and looked down the hallway. “No idea, but we should get her home. Go get dressed and we’ll see if we can sober her up.”

“Got it,” Jake replied, with a nod. Sarah left the room, closing the door behind her. With a bit of haste, Jake rummaged through his dresser and pulled out some clothes to wear. He brought out a simple shirt and pants, both of which looked handmade. In truth, they were, as he had nothing when he first arrived here and pony clothing wasn’t going to fit him. He was just lucky that the town had a local seamstress.

Jake slipped on the shirt and pulled his pants up, but before he left, he tugged on the front of them and looked down at his crotch. “Just what was she looking for?” he quietly asked himself, observing his recently assaulted member. After a few moments of quiet contemplation, he shook his head and made his way out of the room, meeting Sarah in the hallway.

“What’s the gameplan?” Sarah asked, looking down the stairwell. A faint commotion was heard from the kitchen, but nothing more.

Jake looked the opposite direction, down the hallway. “Is Lyra awake?”

“I don’t think so,” Sarah replied, now also looking towards the unicorn’s room.

“Let’s try to keep it that way. The sooner we handle this, the better.” Jake lightly stepped towards the stairs and quietly made his way down, Sarah following closely behind. Neither of them knew what to expect when they got down, so they erred on the side of caution.

The bottom floor of the house was dark, save for a bit of light coming from the kitchen. Jake looked to Sarah and nodded, and the two tiptoed through the house to make it there. As they got closer, they heard slurred mumbling growing in volume. Another few steps and there was a loud crash, followed by swearing. Both Jake and Sarah cringed at the sound.

Finally, the two found themselves in the kitchen, and the sight before them was an odd one at best. The pony was leaning forward, staring at a tipped over chair with such intensity that the wood might suddenly ignite. She even growled a bit.

“Hey, uh… what are you doing there?” Jake asked.

The mare’s attention was slowly pulled away as she glanced to Jake. “This… this chair! I-It tripped me, and it refuses to apologize! So, now I m-must deliver punishment. Observe, humans!”

Before either of them could say anything more, the pony thrust her hoof forward and hit the chair with a resounding thud. The chair did nothing short of explode, shattering to pieces and sending chunks of wood flying everywhere.

Jake lowered his arm, which he’d used to block any debris headed his way, and saw the pony standing over the chair’s remains, a smug grin on her face. It was at that point that he noticed something peculiar. There was a horn gracing her head, which was normal for a unicorn, but there were also a pair of wings on her back. This was no ordinary pony. This was one of the princesses.

The revelation caused Jake to gulp nervously. “Uh, Sarah,” he began, motioning to the alicorn, “this isn’t just any pony we have here.”

“What do yo—” Before she could finish, they heard hoofsteps coming down the stairs. The two turned their heads to see Lyra walking down, nightcap still on.

“What’s with all the noise?” Lyra asked, with a yawn. She looked to the humans with squinted, tired eyes, though it wasn’t long until her gaze shifted to elsewhere in the room. Looking past Jake and Sarah, she then saw the alicorn, still standing over the broken chair. It took a few moments to register, but once it did, her eyes shot open and she gasped “L-L-L-Luna?! What is Princess Luna doing here?!”

“We don’t know,” Sarah whispered. “But she’s very drunk and needs to be taken care of.” She then motioned to the broken chair and frowned. “One piece of furniture was enough.”

“Oh gosh, oh gosh, this is not good,” Lyra sputtered, hooves tapping against the floorboards as she shuffled nervously in place. “What are we gonna do? Are we in trouble? What will Celestia think? How are we gon—Mmph!”

Lyra’s nervous chatter was interrupted by Sarah’s hand going over her mouth. The human leaned down in front of her and looked into her fearful golden eyes. “Lyra. It’s going to be okay. We’ll figure out what to do with her, I promise.”

Sarah felt the tense breathing against her hand lighten up, and Lyra’s eyes narrowed back to normal. Slowly, Sarah brought away her hand, having successfully calmed down the pony. She turned her head to see what Jake was doing, and found him having far less of an easy time with Luna.

“Princess, are you sure you don’t just want some water? Maybe after that you can lay down on my bed and sleep things off. How’s that sound?” Jake asked, attempting to get Luna out of his refrigerator and away from anything else she could break.

“I s-shall not!” Luna slurred, continuing her rummaging. Opening the bottom shelf, she found several celery stalks, which she leaned down and unceremoniously chomped into. “I ahm meehrly huhnry.” The words were muffled, but Jake could still understand her.

His patience was beginning to wear thin, and he wasn’t sure what would happen if he didn’t manage to calm the princess down. Who knew where she would go or what she would do next, especially in her inebriated state. “Luna, please,” Jake pleaded, taking a step towards her. “Just come lie down before you end up doing something you regret.”

Regret.The word rang through Luna’s head, and her eyes slowly widened. The half eaten celery fell out of her mouth, bouncing off the interior of the refrigerator and landing near her hooves. Silently, she backed up and closed the door. “You… you don’t know w-what regret is…”

“Princess, what are you…” Jake trailed off, realizing he had said something wrong. Now, things were really taking a turn for the worse.

“Regret… regret is when y-you turn on your sister and get banished f-from your home country for a millennia. Regret is when you’re f-forced to think about your mistakes every h-hour of every day. Regret is…” Luna choked back a sob and turned to Jake. “It’s when you come back from p-punishment and everypony you used to know is d-dead, and the world is a completely d-different place.”

Jake was frozen in place. He wasn’t sure whether to say something or let her vent, and the consequences of each choice reeled through his head. “Luna, I didn’t—”

“No!” Luna shouted, raising a hoof. “You just don’t know… You have no… no…” Luna took a step forward but lost her balance and fell forward. To everyone else's surprise, she didn’t start crying, despite being on the verge of tears. “Things have been awful, just… terrible!” She made an attempt to stand up, but gave up on the endeavor shortly afterwards. “I’ve had to learn the n-new language, get up to speed on everything that’s c-changed, and try to be as good to the people as my sister, and it just doesn’t work!” She slammed a hoof on the ground to punctuate her sentence.

Both Jake and Sarah cringed as part of the paneling shattered, but there was nothing they could do but listen to the princess pour her heart out for them.

“And that’s… that’s why I drank,” Luna continued, slumping over to her side. “I thought maybe… maybe it would help me forget… maybe I could have a night to be happy… A night that only I appreciate.”

Cautiously, Jake stepped forward and dropped on one knee, then put his hand to Luna’s chin and lifted her head so she could look at him. “I’m sorry to hear that, Luna. I really am. I didn’t mean to bring back bad memories.” He then put his other arm around her torso. “Here, let’s pick you up, alright?”

Luna nodded, allowing herself to be pulled up by the human. As she felt his warm and caring touch, a new feeling began to spread throughout her. It was something she hadn’t felt in a long time, but she embraced it fully. Affection.

“Okay, now you’re back on your hooves. That’s good,” Jake said, still holding onto her. What else could he do to make her feel better? He thought for a moment, going back to what she said. “If it helps, I really enjoy your nights, Luna.”

The princess let out a barely audible gasp. She wasn’t sure if it was the alcohol or genuine kindness, but the simple comment gave her an unbelievable sense of happiness. She could even feel the slightest hint of blush in her cheeks.

As Luna took in Jake’s compliments, he turned his head toward Lyra and Sarah. ‘Get help’ he mouthed to them, and they immediately took the hint. With little more than a nod, the two of them quietly exited down the hallway, and after a moment Jake heard the faint click of the door latch. He let out a sigh of relief, happy that this problem was on it’s way to being solved.

“Did… did you really mean that?” The princess asked, lightly swaying from side to side.

The question pulled his attention away from his thoughts. He looked down at the princess, whose head came up to his chest. Even the largest of ponies in Equestria were still rather small compared to a human male. “What, about enjoying the night?”

She merely nodded her head.

“Of course I did.” He kneeled down so that he was eye level with her. “The nighttime is beautiful. The stars twinkle in the sky, the moon puts a nice light on everything, and it’s great to go out and just admire.”

Luna stared at him for several seconds before falling forward into a hug. Jake caught her before she slumped down his chest, and she rested her head on his shoulder. “Thank you, h-human…”

“It’s, uh, Jake. You can call me Jake.”

“Thank you, Jake… you don’t know h-how much that means to me…”

The hug went on for several moments, even until it started to become uncomfortable for Jake. Luna merely rested herself against him, not bothering to move. He opened his mouth to say something, but before he could, Luna began to speak.

“I can’t remember the last time anypony, or anyone, was s-so nice to me, Jake,” she began, words still slurred occasionally. While calmed down now, she hadn’t gotten any more sober. “I really, really appreciate you being there for me…”

“Well, I’m just… y’know, looking out for you…”

“I appreciate it so much that I t-think I should do something in return. E-Especially for being such a rude house guest.” Something in her tone changed, but Jake wasn’t quite sure what.

The hairs on the back of his neck prickled upwards as Luna nuzzled against him. “You don’t have to do that, really. I’m just doing what anyone would.”

“I insist, Jake,” Luna said, her tone growing more husky. “Let me repay you for your k-kindness.”

Oh no. Before he could even react to what she was implying, he felt the frighteningly familiar sensation of a hoof rubbing against his crotch. He glanced down to find Luna touching him, and in his ear he could hear her breathing more heavily. As quick as he could, he pulled himself back, standing upright and looking down at her. The two of them were blushing furiously, but only his was out of embarrassment.

“Look, Luna, you’re a very pretty mare and all, but I don’t know about this,” Jake said, rubbing the back of his head. “I mean I’ve kinda been interested in Sarah, seeing as she’s the only human I’ve got here, and I wanted someone more compatible, you see?”

Luna glanced around, going so far as to completely spin in a circle. “W-Well, she’s not here right now, is she? If she’s not here then it won’t matter… You’ll still be able to be with her.”

“Yeah, but isn’t this a bit sudden, I mean, ah…” Jake tried to protest more, but the tent that his pants were pitching seemed to disagree with his thought process. He looked up to find that she was eying the bulge in his pants almost hungrily. She even licked her lips as she advanced forward. “Hey now, that doesn’t mean I want to do it!”

His weak attempts at staving off the princess did nothing to slow her. Taking a step back, Jake realized he only had one option.

Spinning on his feet, he ran out of the kitchen and into the hallway, as quick as a man can run in a house designed for creatures much smaller than he while having a raging erection. Behind him, he heard Luna laugh and take chase, followed by several loud bangs as she inevitably lost her balance and slammed into something. Regardless, it didn’t seem to slow her down.

Jake took a turn, entering the living room briefly before running down another hallway.

“Oh, Jake! Come back!” Luna called, in a singsong voice.

As much as Jake wanted to give in, he had to put in a little bit of fight and at least try. He had always planned for his first sexual encounter in Equestria to be with Sarah. It made sense, all things considered. Things didn’t always work out between them, though, and in recent months Jake had been having his doubts about a relationship with her. As he ran through the house, trying to evade this drunk princess’s sexual advances, he contemplated.

Making another turn, Jake ended up back in the kitchen. Sometimes, he found himself very appreciative of the fact that Lyra’s house looped around. Quickly, he bounded up the stairs, but Luna was hot on his trail.

“Why, boner, why?” Jake grunted, the tightness in his pants starting to take its toll. Running was rather uncomfortable. He made an effort to run into his room and shut the door, but by the time he had turned around, Luna was right there.

Like an excited puppy seeing its master, Luna jumped at Jake’s chest, sending him to the ground. Silently, he thanked Lyra for having extra thick carpeting. Looking upwards, he saw Luna standing over him, eyes half lidded and tongue licking lips.

“It seems I’ve caught you, Jake,” Luna said, matter-of-factly. “Now, will you accept a reward from your princess?”

Jake sighed, unable to resist the temptations of the princess any longer. While he wanted to hold out and possibly be with Sarah, he had far too little sex and seen far too many pony parts during his time in Equestria. With one final attempt, he tried to get out of the situation. “Luna, really, I can—”

He was cut off by Luna pressing her mouth against his and taking him in a powerful kiss. Never in his life did he think he was ever going to kiss a horse, yet here he was.

Luna’s tongue slid into his mouth, exploring the new area. Now caught in the heat of things, Jake lashed his tongue against hers as well. After a few seconds though, he began to notice a very peculiar taste coming from her.

At first he thought it was just her breath, but her mouth and saliva tasted heavily of alcohol. The potency was so strong that he felt himself getting dizzy just from being in contact with her. He could only take a few more seconds of the drunken kiss before pulling away, a thin trail of saliva connecting them.

Their breaths were hot and heavy, and for several seconds they just stared at each other, looking into each other's eyes. Hers were crazed and lustful, while his were desperate and longing. For a split second he glanced down, but it was more than enough for Luna to take the hint.

With a sly smile, she backed up until her head was right above his crotch. The bulge was still there, and stronger than ever. Leaning down, she rubbed her muzzle against it and breathed, taking in the scent of his arousal. Jake took a quiet breath and waited for her next move.

Luna’s horn adopted a soft blue glow, and shortly after, so did the zipper of his pants. After a quick zip and the unlatching of a button, Jake’s jeans unfolded, leaving his underwear as the only obstacle between her and what she craved.

She leaned down, opting to use her teeth to pull the fabric aside. Her warm breath washed over him as she did so, causing him to shut his eyes momentarily and take a deep breath. With a smile, she moved the flap and produced his ‘mushroom’ before her.

Instead of going for it immediately, she opted to stare at it and observe it. “My… so much bigger than before…” she whispered, her eyes wide with amazement. Jake had always considered himself average, but with most stallions being smaller than him physically, it wasn’t all that surprising that he was on par—or larger—than whatever she had seen.

“It’ll… It’ll do that…” Jake said, cracking a smile. Luna glanced up at him for a moment, then slowly moved her hoof towards it. Gently, she stroked from the tip to the shaft, sending a chill down Jake’s spine. She didn’t need to ask to know if it pleased him.

Finally, when she was done looking at the foreign equipment, she leaned down, until her mouth was no more than an inch from the tip. Every breath caused it to throb, and she couldn’t help but smile at the involuntary movements. She licked her lips, done teasing him. It was time to show her appreciation.

In a smooth motion, she took the head of his cock into her mouth. The sudden warmth and wetness made him moan, but he tried his best to stay quiet. Every motion she made, however, was making that harder and harder to do.

Luna rolled her tongue across it, taking in the scent and taste. It wasn’t so different from a stallion, as far as she could remember. Perhaps it was a bit cleaner. All the same, she relished the flavor and took her time with it.

Slowly, she accepted more of the shaft into her mouth, enjoying the feeling as it occupied the empty space. After being satisfied with how much she had gotten inside her, she rose back up, only to go back down again. She developed a slow rhythm, moving up and down, taking more of him inside her with every repeat.

Jake, lying against the floor, was in ecstasy. He didn’t know how long it had been since he had gotten attention like this down there, but he was certainly loving it. Every time Luna bobbed her head, her tongue rubbed right along the underside of the shaft, giving him feelings he wasn’t even sure he had felt before.

Once she had taken his full length into her mouth—and consequently part of her throat—several times, she attempted to take note of its distinction. “Tha tih ih soh diff’hent” she mumbled, her mouth stuffed with cock. “Ih nah lih a sahlion ah all.”

Jake grunted, her mouth movements somehow making it better. “Yeah.. it’s… it’s different alright…”

One last time, Luna worked herself all the way down and kissed the base of his dick, then came back up and removed herself with a soft pop. Her saliva coated his member and gently flowed down the length. She licked her lips again, but this time to get all of the flavor off. Then, she moved back up and gave Jake another kiss.

He was about to thank her for the ‘appreciation’ when she turned around, giving him a prime view of her own soaking entrance. Unsurprisingly, her anatomy was just like that of a horse back home on earth. Every so often it ‘winked’ at him, and he wasn’t sure how he felt about that. Considering the situation, he decided on ‘arousing.’

Jake was just about to question what he should do with it before she wiggled her rump, then turned around and rested her body on top of his. She moved back bit by bit until she felt the whole of his girth sliding against her vagina. Once they contacted, she raised and lowered her backside just a small bit, effectively grinding against his cock.

“Does this please you?” she asked, voice low and sultry.

Jake nodded, whispering out a “Yes.”

“Why don’t you touch it?” she asked, taking a hoof and rubbing her butt. Jake didn’t need to be asked twice. Moving his hands up, he grabbed her buttocks and squeezed the flesh, feeling the soft fur and skin mold between his fingers. Luna moaned softly as the extra touching stimulated her.

He spent a few moments kneading her behind before squishing the cheeks together and then slowly thrusting upwards, sending his cock between them. All the while, he rubbed against Luna’s wet hole, giving her the occasional shiver.

“You have such a way with those… those fingers…” Luna gasped, leaning her head down and allowing him to toy with her how she wished. No stallion could provide something like this to her, of that she was certain.

She gave him another deep kiss as they ground against each other. Their collective grunts and moans echoed throughout the room, and if someone else were in the house, they surely would have heard.

Suddenly, Luna pulled away and stood up, trying to control her breathing. Jake leaned against the bed, then slowly stood up, but just as quickly fell back to sit on the bed. Luna pushed him there, and her horn lit up again. This time, the glow encased all of Jake’s clothes. Magically, his shirt was pulled off, tossed to the side, and his pants followed suit. Then, his underwear were flung off. Once Jake was naked, her aura faded, and the clothes landed throughout the room.

Just as quick as the magic faded, the moon princess descended upon him, pushing Jake to the bed and peppering his face with more intoxicating kisses. This time, he graciously accepted them, pulling her closer as they laid on the bed.

As their tongues clashed a second time, Luna found herself continuing to grind against his rigid shaft, still slick with her saliva. The heat radiating from it was almost enough to send her over the edge, yet she persevered. They hadn't even gotten to the good part yet.

Their mouths parted, both of them bathing the other in her breaths. "Art thou ready for true pleasure?" she asked, with a giggle. She had gradually dropped the old speaking ways, but it was fun to bring them back sometimes.

Again, Jake nodded, though this time he said nothing.

Her horn glowed faintly again, and he felt his cock being moved around. Moments later, the tip found itself snug against Luna's wet crevice, which practically begged to be filled. The light nod she gave was more than enough for him to oblige.

In a fluid motion, he grabbed hold of her rear and bucked his hips forward, burrowing himself deep within her. Luna let out a cry as her folds were parted and she accepted his girth. For a moment, they stayed like that, feeling their body heat against one another. Then, Jake slowly pulled out, coaxing a whimper from the alicorn. Before the tip reached the entrance, he pushed back in and developed a smooth rhythm to his thrusts.

"Jake," Luna moaned, kissing his cheeks, "don't hold back." The kisses moved from cheeks to his lips as he thrust harder, the bed beginning yo squeak under them. "Oh yes... this greatly pleases your princess..."

Her kissing began to affect him more severely. The dizziness turned to blurriness, and his senses seemed sharpen and weaken at random. Jake didn't know how it was possible, but he was too preoccupied with pounding into Luna to really think on it. Deep inside, he felt a pressure building up, but he tried his best to draw it out. He wanted as much time with royalty as possible.

"Uhn... Why me...?" Jake moaned, his eyes closed in concentration as he moved his hips. "So many choices... and you pick me..." His speech drawled out, an effect of the abundant kissing Luna showered him in. He was glad he didn't have to move anywhere.

"N—Ahn!—No questions," Luna moaned, briefly interrupted by a sweet spot being hit. "Focus on your princess." Her tongue lolled out of her mouth as Jake buried himself inside her over and over. Alcohol laden breath washed over his face, which he inhaled deeply. He relished the scent of her lustful, wine-scented panting.

Then, with a grunt, he changed his position. Luna gasped as he sat up, taking her with him and cradling her in his arms. Holding her butt, he bounced her up and down on his cock, penetrating deeper than before.

"Oh, oh! This is... stars above, this feeling has eluded me," Luna moaned leaning into Jake. Their chests heaved at the exertion, but the pace never slowed. "Soon," she muttered, eyes half-lidded. "Do not stop." It sounded like more of a plea than an order, not that Jake would disobey. He himself was starting to feel close to done.

It happened sooner than she expected. One particularly hard thrust came, unleashing a torrent of pleasure that radiated throughout her body. It came in waves, warming and numbing from her core outwards. All Luna could do was gasp as her body spasmed on his cock.

Jake felt her rapidly contract around him, followed by shivers going through her body. Her breathing was erratic, in between gasps and cries of 'stars, help me.' Her tightening and twitching lasted for a good half minute before she went limp, leaning against him for support. He had just made a princess of Equestria cum.

"Finish... whenever you please..." Luna mumbled into his shoulder, lightly bouncing from his continued thrusts. "You have greatly satisfied me, human."

That was something Jake could take pride in. Now that she slumped against him, body tired and weary, he found it right to not hold back anymore. Almost immediately after doing so, he felt the pressure rise up at the base of his shaft, and he instinctively moved faster to help it along. He thrust several more times, then grit his teeth as he felt the oncoming flood. With a groan, he made one final push inside her that sent him over the edge.

He buried himself as deep as he could, bucking his hips wildly as he came. His seed erupted within her, coating her insides with strands of hot cum. He breathed heavily and stayed still, allowing himself time to recover. After the rush and initial pleasure wore off, the two of them leaned into each other, panting, sweaty, and still connected.

Luna was the first to separate. She slowly leaned up, smiling to Jake as she did so. With a faint squishing sound, she pulled herself off of his shrinking cock, and the fluids built up inside her began to leak out. Thick globs oozed out of her, a clear and milky-white puddle forming around her hind hooves.

As she did so, Jake leaned back on the bed and gave a triumphant grin. More than anything, he was glad that they were a different species, or he would have a serious problem on his hands. Having drunken sex with a princess was bad enough, and he didn’t even want to have a passing thought on what would happen if she could somehow breed with him.

“S-So, was your reward satisfactory?” Luna asked, her legs shaky. While she was still fairly intoxicated, it was more an aftermath of the sex that left her wobbling now.

Jake breathed out, arms spread eagle as he stared at the ceiling. It spun above him slightly, but didn’t disorient, for the bed held him quite comfortably. “Yes… very much yes,” he answered, not taking his gaze off the crossbeams above. He wasn’t quite sure if it was because he had gotten tipsy or because he hadn’t had sex in such a long time, but it was the best session he had in recent memory.

Luna nodded and gave a sly grin. Stepping over, she looked at the ground where the puddle of fluids now laid. It seemed to sober her a bit. “Come, Jake. We s-should clean this mess up before somepony finds us.”

“Oh, right…” Jake mumbled, remembering that Sarah and Lyra had gone out to get help before Luna’s little moment. With a soft groan, he sat up, then looked around. Opening the drawer next to his bed, he pulled out a small box of tissues and held it out for Luna. He quickly took one for himself as she pulled it away, then wiped down the mess that was his groin. Afterwards, he slowly stood up and stretched, then went searching around his room for the clothes he had on earlier.

After several minutes, he had recovered his underwear, shirt, and pants, the latter of which had somehow ended up under the bed. By the time he had pulled them all on, Luna was just finishing up cleaning off her rear. Jake wasn’t sure how well the mess on the floor had been cleaned up, for it was only moonlight that lit his room up, but he held some trust in the princess.

Luna crumpled up the last tissue and tossed it into the nearby garbage pail. As it silently fell to the bottom, the two heard a knock at the door. Luna’s ears shot up and Jake’s body straightened out entirely, and for a few moments they weren’t sure what to do.

“I guess we should…”

“Yes, let’s,” Luna said, turning towards the door and walking out. Jake observed a very evident limp in her walk, and he knew it wasn’t because of the alcohol. With a nervous breath, he followed her out and down the stairs.

The two reached the front door, and Luna stepped off to the side, almost like she didn’t want to be seen. Fair enough, Jake thought, grabbing the handle of the door. With a twist, he swung open the door. “Sarah, Lyra, I’m glad you’re… back…”

His speech trailed off as he came face to face with Princess Celestia. Her expression was unreadable, but she didn’t seem upset. But what if she was? Jake gulped at the thought, then tried to compose himself. “P-Princess Celestia! I’m so glad you’re here.” Glancing behind her, Jake spotted Lyra and Sarah, both looking tired but with smiles on their faces.

Celestia gave a slight nod, then glanced inside. “Luna, are you there? I’ve come to take you home, sister.”

After a moment, Luna stepped from out of the shadows and into the doorway. “Sister…” she said, avoiding eye contact.

The opposing alicorn lifted a hoof and rested it on Luna’s shoulder. The light touch caused Luna to look up, at Celestia’s smiling face. “Everything is fine, Luna. I am only here to see that you make it safely back to the castle. No more. If there’s anything you want to discuss, we can speak later. How does that sound?”

Luna contemplated Celestia’s words, then slowly nodded. “That sounds… fine. Thank you, sister.” She leaned forward, taking her sister in an awkward sibling hug that lasted a few seconds longer than it needed to, but no one around dared question it.

Celestia then turned her head, ethereal mane flowing in an ever-present breeze, and looked to Lyra and Sarah. “Thank you for alerting Twilight Sparkle for me, you two. I don’t know how long it would have been until I found out the hard way.” For a moment, a devious looking smirk graced her snowy face.

“Of course! Any time, Princess!” Lyra said, hopping in place excitedly.

Sarah yawned, then gave a weak two-fingered salute. “Glad we could help each other out.”

Celestia turned her gaze back to Jake. “And thank you, Jake, for looking after Luna in her… unique state. I appreciate your courage and dignity.”

“It was no trouble, really,” Jake said, cracking a smile. “I just did what I had to.” He felt the heat in his cheeks building up with every passing second. Before anyone could notice, he quickly stepped aside and allowed Luna to exit, then let Lyra and Sarah into the house.

Celestia looked to Luna. “Ready to leave, sister? Can you fly straight?” Luna stretched out her wings and gave them a couple flaps, but found that she wobbled dangerously in the air. Celestia merely let out a laugh. “Very well. We’ll walk together.”

“Farewell, Jake,” Luna said, looking to him briefly. She then turned to Jake and Sarah. “Apologies for my earlier behavior. I will… send money for a new chair.” Celestia stifled a giggle, then patted Luna on the back with a wing.

“Come, Luna. Canterlot is a long way from here.” After they had exchanged their goodbyes, Celestia and Luna turned away and began walking. With few words, Lyra and Sarah hurried off to bed, leaving Jake standing in the doorway, watching the two princesses leave.

Before they had gotten too far, Celestia turned her head stared at Jake, then smiled slyly and gave a knowing wink. Jake felt his heart sink in his chest. Did something give him away? Did she know what happened? As quickly as the motion happened, she was already walking forward again, giving him no time to react.

With a nervous grin, Jake slowly stepped back inside, closing the door behind him. He could only wonder what his dreams would be like tonight.