> Deadpool Kills the My Little Pony Universe
>  by iamthemithras
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

> Prologue: In the Beginning
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


Prologue: In the Beginning...


"Well... is this it? did I do it?" a voice trailed off as it travels through the endless abyss of darkness. Falling continuously, the red figure with an attire ripped from every side surrendered to his fate. "Is this what destroying all of existence feels like?... sort of an anticlimax after all I've done" 

Very recently Deadpool just defeated Sherlock Holmes and his posse intent on stopping him to carry on his mission, leaving Holmes to slowly fade away from existence as he plummet to his fate, unsure of his next move.

{{What were you expecting?}} a voice inside him answered. It was ominous, the very tone of which reeked of death and strangely despair. There was uncertainty in its voice. Uncertain whether it was content with the fun it had or not of the last few weeks.

"I don't know... maybe like, disappear with existence maybe? I don't know, I didn't really expect to even stay conscious after destroying the universe or something like that"

There was no response. As if his one guide is finally unsure of what to do next himself. It was silent... too silent... maybe this was punishment for killing everyone in the universe? somehow staying somewhere like the negative zone would make up for all the time he killed the Fantastic Four? Maybe he isn't finished, or is he? Is this really what happens when you finally destroy all of existence? Maybe he'll shortly go to the afterlife? Will he still kill everyone there?... No... this place has no God, that he is sure of unless you count maybe Stan Lee as God... hmm.. will he be killing the religion universe next?

"AAAGGH!... this sucks! If I knew this would happen I wouldn't have destroyed the universe in the first place! Fighting the Avengers would be a real treat than hanging around in this dump..."

{{We're not finished}}

"Ah.. well, of course"

{{There's a flux of... presence I can sense that is acting separate from our own. I can feel it only now}}

".... Uhh... What does that mean Doc Brown?"

{{It means we're not finished}}

"Of course. SO, do I use this flux capacitor thingy on my belt to go all De Lorean over there or...?"

{{No need. It seems to be drawing us in}}

"Huh?"

Suddenly in the void, Deadpool can feel a force drawing him in - pulling him from wherever he is. Though he can't see it through the darkness, he can feel a strong pull not unlike what he had experienced a lot lately. In the vacuum of the abyss, Deadpool was sucked into a vortex unseen from the naked eye, bringing him to a place he would not imagine he would be involved with.
> Chapter 1: Atop the Everfree Forest
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------






Chapter 1: Atop the Everfree Forest


Atop the Everfree forest, a bright light shines in the night sky.

Within this solitary evening, Zecora affords the silence as she get her bed ready. She just finished gathering a new batch of Heart's Desire from the forest after helping Fluttershy's pet rabbit Angel from being sick. A good way to end the evening.

She appreciates their visit. Even if most of their visits are about asking for help or advice - even with the baby dragon earlier who she helped learn a lesson about generosity.

It is good to be appreciated.

The thought made her smile. So did of a time when those very same ponies were afraid of her - A time where ponies feared another which they don't understand, all fixed by a little filly named Applebloom. 

It has been a while. She wonder if should visit Ponyville tomorrow and purchase supplies for her next likely potion of whatever those little ponies would get themselves into. With her closing thoughts, she lay her head to rest for a hard day's work. Eager to start a new day.



Atop the Everfree forest, a bright light shone in the night sky.

It flashed once, twinkling in the sky and flashed again, shining. The white light bounced about the indigo leaves of the trees and in a moment seemed to explode. In the wake, a red figure plummeted from the blast.

"What the--?! Whoa! WOAH! AHHH! AHHHHH!!!" his screams pierced the still night sky as he fell onto the trees below, each branch hitting him all over on his face, his chest, and several times his groin. 

He fell to the ground with such gravity it didn't feel like the trees cushioned his fall at all, or his chances on still becoming a father. He crawled to a fetal position and allowed his healing factor to kick in.

"Ugh... well... ow... there goes my chance of getting called Dadpool... I understand the comic relief but.. ah.. I never thought writers could be this much of a dick... hah... get it?.. because of the... ah..."

{{You're playing for attention again, that's not what we're here for}} the voice was very commanding and asking for attention, like Dr. Doom before he starts a monologue and reveal his next evil plan to the Fantastic Four.

"Ugh... I know..." Deadpool tried to sit up from his fall "I just... I don't know.. feel out of character lately... not because of you mind you... it's just that... I don't know"

{{Like I said, you don't need to play for show anymore, that's what they want you to do. They want you to give a shit when  there's no point in really giving a shit}}

Deadpool tried to stand up and noticed his left leg was twisted, he grabbed hold of it and began twisting it back to normal.

{{You're playing their game. You don't need to do that anymore because you have me now. You've always looked for me and you know that. A reason to live in a world without reason}}

Snapping back in place he finally untwisted his leg. He gets a feel for it before standing up to look at his surroundings.

One word. Trees. And plants. Weird plants... okay maybe more like 5 words but you get the idea. And it's dark here, technically there's so many trees around here there's not enough light to go around to tell if it's day outside or night, which could be a metaphor for the bleakness of life or something like that... Deadpool didn't like being deep, despite doing that a lot lately


"What is this that my eyes see? Surely something hard to believe!" Zecora whispered to herself silently as she gaze upon the red creature.

The blast from the sky and the tumbling scream down the forest woke her up. She knew she had to see the disturbance herself and here she stood, mouth ajar at this strange new creature. Cockatrices and manticores have frequent this forest, but nothing like this... thing before. 

It seem to be standing on its two hind legs, with its two front legs on its side. Its claws have a strange shape with talons that are smaller but more numerous that what she normally see on animals. The skin, scarred and bulging underneath from every place. 

What little fabric covered this creature is red and ripped from every side like it was from a deadly battle, then her eyes turn onto the two swords strapped across its chest to its back. 

Everything in her gut is telling her to run away but the sight of something held her in place - A mask unlike anything else she had ever seen. Roundish black spots accenting small and beady eyes, ripped to what she could assume used to be a full mask.

Her mind seems to leave her the more she stare until its small mouth moving about catch her attention. It seems to be talking but... to who? ...Who or what is this thing talking to?

"Strange trees... strange plants... Yup. I bet I’m either in some children's fantasy show or Australia. Am I here to kill the smurfs? Do they count as inspiring literature?"

That creature! It can speak common! She doesn't understand what it meant, but she heard what it said. Especially the kill part. 


Her strength finally returns and by instinct she turns to flee. As she back away, a loud snap of a branch under her hoof jolt her in surprise. Cruelly, the sound only amplifies more throughout the silence.


"Well, look at this! Branches ARE always very loud in tense situations.... like... this..." his voice softened when Deadpool got a good look at the noise-maker. It seemed to look like a... Zebra, so Australia it is then, he's definitely in Australia he's sure. Deadpool's no zoologist or whatever but he's pretty sure Zebra's don't wear jewelry. 

"...H-Hello.. strange creature of this night. May I ask if you are alright?" the little zebra broke the silence, well this is convenient. A voodoo that can actually speak English -- wait a minute. Did that Zebra just TALKED?

"... a -- ARE YOU TALKING TO ME?" Deadpool blinked, thinking he might have hit his head on a branch too many. He didn't think the hallucinations would start so quick when he ate that glowing mushroom earlier.

It keeps a hoof backward, seeming to be debating whether to answer or not. Finally it relents, almost spitting out its words "Why yes strange creature, said by this lone seeker. Please tell me without fright, what brings you here this time of the night?"

{{This is very interesting.}}

When all's said and done, Deadpool wasn't expecting he would end up killing Moby Dick or Don Quixote or The Ghost of Christmas Past, but THIS? A talking zebra? He's still in the fictional world alright and his work is definitely not done, but here? in a place where zebras talk and who knows what else, what is he going to do here? Why did he end up here anyway? Why was he asking all this questions? He sure could use the help of an ominous voice right now.

The zebra just stood there staring at him. With the air not getting any less tense it proceeded to back away slowly.

"That thing is going away... what do I do?" Deadpool thought to himself waiting for his friendly evil voice inside his head to say something

{{I don't think we've met that thing by accident. Kill it}}

Of course, the first thing you do when you see a talking zebra is to kill it. Everyone who plays video games know that. He never really got the habit of killing animals, unless you count Harold Howard the Duck.


As the creature drew its weapons from its back, she knew she had to run. As soon as the light reflect from the blade, Zecora runs to the opposite direction - certain that this thing is eager for her demise.


{{AFTER IT!!}} the voice was more demanding than before, like a step dad pushing you out of the house to buy his liquor at the store.

"Damn that thing is fast! Maybe I should have been more subtle, like drawing my gun instead" He ran, trying to catch up to the fleeing zebra which he is totally not going to kill and will just ask for directions instead "Hey! Stop!"



Running for her life, Zecora is lucky she knows this part of the woods really well and knows the path to her hut. She wants to scream but she knew nopony would be near enough to hear her - she would need all the energy she could get to run away from this monster but the only sanctuary she had was her hut. If she has an invisibility potion she could use and run straight to --

The sound of a defeaning surge explodes behind her. She trip as her hooves give out to the dirt... she feel a sting rising from her left haunch. Growing. PAINFUL.

"AAAHHHHH!! AHHH!!" She tries to stand but her hoof give away, slidding against the blood flowing to the ground "AAAAAAHHHH!!!"

She force the pain out of her mind, limping and dragging the rest of her appendages away from the monster. 

Pain is temporary. Pain is temporary.

PONYVILLE MUST BE WARNED

"Good little zebra! heh... I guess you really can teach other animals a few tricks"

Her head alarmingly twist to the monster standing right behind her, mocking her pathetic display. Her cowardice. Paleness and cold overtook her at that instant...

"Please... let me live..." she tried to hold back her tears but to no avail "Spare me and I will leave..." This cannot be real. This must be a nightmare - YES! Let her wake up! Let this be no more than a nightmare!

"How cute. Even in the brink of death you still speak in rhymes"

{{Enough already, just get this over with}}

Its lanky limbs reach out behind itself and unsheathes two thin-sheet blades reflecting the moonlight about. Her vision drowns to her reflection on the metal sheets closer and closer and closer...

The light reflected from the blade as it digs itself to the side of the injured zebra. Her scream echoed throughout the forest. The birds flew away, the bunnies hid, a bear turned to its direction. A cry for help, a scream of pain, and a howl of sadness all at once. 

Every creature knew what it was. Who it was.



And shwwwwsh!! a swift swing from his left for dramatic effect!

As the zebra's head rolls on the ground, Deadpool remembered when he first killed Wolverine on one-on-one. This was a pretty clean cut, blood dripping endlessly from the neck like a faucet while the rings around the neck dangle away to the ground. Taking a glance at the severed head he watched as it slowly close an eyelid halfway. Was that thing winking at him?... maybe not...

"Damn it I can't think of any good head jokes..." Deadpool stood up, looking at his handiwork a little disappointed "...hmm.. hey! 'Well, you can look forward to get ahead in life!'... ah no, that won't cut it... how anti-climactic"

Staring at the dead animal for a few moments, Deadpool finally broke the silence "... so that was fun and all... but what now? and why?"

{{This place is different from wherever we have ever been since}}

"Tell me about it, but I think we kind of established that already. I don't remember any inspiring work of fiction that involves zebras... what am I on, a Disney Movie? Am I killing the Disney universe now?"

{{I don't think so. I can tell this plane of existence is... somehow parallel to us in time... like the founding ideas this reality is built on is similar to our own}}

"... uh huh... ...HEY! I just noticed our cuss words aren't censored! AAASSSSDICK, FUCK-ING son of a BITCH! ho ho! the freedom! Well, I can say we aren't in a Disney movie since I can say fuck whenever I want"

{{Regardless, I can feel this place is more... well, that there's more 'corporate hype' around here than our own adjacent universes}}

"You mean whatever this is, it's more popular than us? Well we can't have that now, can we?"

{{Yes. and you know what that means}} 

The tone of the voice suddenly sounds more ominous than ever, but he knows why.

"It means this place needs our help"

{{More than anything we've helped so far}}

"Oh yeah, let's play the good Murderer-Samaritan now"

Shooting one look at his kill, he walked away with contentment that he gets to redeem yet another universe. Time to clock in another universe on the job. 

As the body of continue to litter the ground with its blood, he wonders if he would ever stop. Will he keep murdering every single cartoon or movie out there?

When he started this 'Killing everyone to free them from corporate slavery' thing, it felt like a noble mission to him. The kind that he knew was meant for nobody else but a psychopath like him. After a while in this business, he's actually beginning to enjoy it...

Atop the Everfree Forest a bright light shone in the night sky.
> Chapter 2: My Little Angel
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------






Chapter 2: Angel


"WEEEEEE!!!! Oh my gosh, this is SOO GREAT!! Ahahaha!"

It's the ultimate paradise of all paradises there could be of all paradises, and every time she jumps the view just gets better! Everything around her - candy and sweets! Candy canes towering like trees branching huge mosses of cotton candy with chocolate balls hanging onto like fruits from every corner, CUPCAKES the size of bushes from every side, strawberry candy wrapped everywhere around - oh my!

Her eyes sparkling like crystals and her drool... uh.. drooling, Pinkie Pie is at a loss for words - STUNNED from the beauty of the place to even begin her desire to eat everything in sight! Inner desires gradually becoming harder to contain, she leaps to a shrubbery of blue moss nearby, taking a not-so-generous bite. 

Blueberry! Prepared delectably ripe from its season - the taste heavenly divine. The moss sweetly melting in her mouth, her palate begs for MORE. She take a bite on the candy cane tree beside her, savoring the sweet sensation that tingles in her mouth - the pleasure hypnotizing her as she take two large bites at the base, toppling it to the floor.

Her insides screaming with delight, begging for more. Nibbling at the mass of cotton candy, she gulps a few chocolate balls - melting them in her mouth. Bliss.

What could ever compare to THIS? She feels like exploding, but she feels like eating too so she picked the more attractive option. 

Not able to stop and not wanting to, instantly she see herself beside a HUGE cupcake - big as herself! Grinning, Pinkie Pie leap mouth first on its top helping herself, digging with her jaws lapping up the cake in her mouth.

Cupcakes, candy canes, cotton candy! Everything taste as good as they look! She pause, taking a moment to appreciate the beauty of the land. The fluffy cerulean cotton candy clouds float high above and over the pink squishy spongy ground as if... it was made of CAKE! 

She scoops up the ground and bring it with a purpose towards her begging tongue. She's right! The taste brings back sweet SWEET nostalgia of Marzipan-Meringue-Madness -- MMM!!!

"MMMMM!!!! Everything is sooo great! ha ha ha!!" She lie, giggling gleefully out of her senses as she surrender consciousness to pure absolute happiness...

This is it. This is what life should be.

Suddenly she feel a cold shiver all over, springing from her hooves, crawling and skittering its way to her back, her neck. Her rear hooves whip by themselves, her body sinking through the floor, darkness circling all around. Falling...

"AAHHH!!" 

Pinkie scream to nopony in the evening bedroom. The shock made her sit up, looking around in a panic throughout her room. Curtains closed, the door locked, she spy upon Gummy her pet crocodile still soundly asleep in his little basket

"Huh... what was that all about?" looking down, she notice her covers at the floor like she kicked them out of the bed.

"... did.. did I had a pinkie sense?"





He has to warn Fluttershy.

Fleeing from the forest, a little white rabbit is hopping as fast as he could to Fluttershy's cottage. 

What should've been a medicine visit has turned into this. Hiding in a bush, he heard Zecora screaming and begging somepony... following the voice he saw it drew a blade at her side, his eyes magnified when he saw the horror being done. As it slice away Zecora's... he couldn't take it anymore, he just fled.

Death has never been easy for him and Fluttershy, but it's a part of life. But this?... Zecora killed by some animal he has never seen before but all he knows is that he has to warn Fluttershy.

Hopping as fast as he could, he finally reach the cottage. With every animal in their pens fast asleep he leaps to the open window - the same way he sneaked out. They've always felt safe near Ponyville, but after today he swears he's going to tell Fluttershy to lock everything.

Silently leaping upstairs he reach Fluttershy soundlessly asleep on her bed, the covers wrapping protectively around her. Peaceful, her long pink mane and tail carelessly cover her pillow and bed. Angel doesn't want to disturb her, but he has to.

Hopping on her, Angel quickly tap his left foot in a panic - repeatedly wake her up. 

She exhales a tired whimper. Light headed, Fluttershy slowly open her eyes to the sight of her Angel tapping furiously. The utter terror plain as day on his face, sunken eyes, and breathing heavily from exhaustion.

"... Angel honey?... What's the matter? Is everything alright?"





"GOD DAMN IT! FUCK FUCK FUCK!"

It has been 5 minutes. As Deadpool continue walking around the forest, he thought to himself that maybe he should have asked that talking zebra for directions first. It's bad enough that there's not enough light and the trees look all the same in the forest but what really ticks him off is stumbling onto the zebra he killed earlier again, several times already. 3 times so far.

"I swear, the trees around me are practically cloned. Like reused background in a Hanna-Barbera chase scene. Whoever designed this forest is pretty fucking lazy, GOD DAMN IT, THERE'S THAT ZEBRA AGAIN"

Walking non-stop, he stumbled upon the corpse of his earlier kill again. Still fresh although it’s no longer leaking out blood like a Cannibal Corpse album. Why do they call it 'clean cuts' when it ends up like this? He turned his attention to the severed head two feet away. His hands on his hips.

"Are you trying to haunt my dreams or something? I'll have you know the position for the evil-vengeful-voice-inside-a-psychopathic-yet-awesome-and-super-sexy-mercenary-named-Wade-Wilson's-head... <inhales>... has already been taken, but come again after three months and I might consider your application" 

One eye open and one half-closed it didn't so much as give a nod or bow its head in acceptance... pretty bad ass. He'll have to think of it once there's an opening for the position of haunting-image-that-appears-in-Deadpool's-nightmares

"I really need to stop talking to corpses, they might answer back" with a huff he squatted near the body, observing the stripes layered on it. Looking at it closely they're not like the zebra's he sees on National Geographic when he sometimes gloss over the channels on the TV, slouching at his couch at his apartment... No... come to think of it, he doesn't remember zebras having a spiral... mark or something on their thighs.

Looking back at the detached head, Deadpool picked it up with one hand by the base facing him with its lifeless eyes. This sure is a special looking zebra, sporting a Mohawk, and with the earrings still dangling on the ears it kinda looks like a generic rock star. Looking back on before, this thing was running to somewhere...

"Where were you running off to, huh?"

No response.

Sure that's okay, with its head being detached and all. Deadpool was decapitated a lot of times in his lifetime, he understands... hmmph. What a jerk.

He let go, looking over it as it topple over the body then to the ground. This was getting boring. With no lead and no entertaining conversations going on he sure hoped he'd just get out of this forest right now. His only comfort right now is to exploit the lack of censorship and shamelessly curse once in a while.

Crap. He can't believe he's lost. FUCK. FUCKING ASS FUCKING ZEBRA FUCKING --

In the distance he can see a very dim light. It's almost invisible, had he not stared into nothing while cussing he wouldn't have noticed it. He stood up, walking to its direction. The path to the light was covered by trees and shrubbery but it's still noticeable, only barely. Pushing aside the damn plants out of the way, the light slowly becomes more vivid with every step, pushing one more stray branch out of the way he finally reached it.

"This... just defines tree house right here"

It's not even a tree house... more like a... house inside a tree, not a house on a tree so uh... tree house then? It had a huge wooden door with two open windows giving off the light he saw earlier, there were a bunch of lanterns hanging on the branches of the tree, there's even a voodoo mask or whatever it’s called placed on the side, very... welcoming of whoever lives here.

It looks like someone asked a tribesman to make a tree house with no context.

Unsheathing his right sword with his right hand in case of self-defense, he approached the door, pushing inside with his other hand. Entering, he see that nobody is home then sadly whimpers to himself like a puppy expecting a treat but not getting any from his asshole owner. 

There's a single round table in the center probably intended for tea parties, a cauldron at the corner which is obviously for voodoo curse stuffs, several cabinets around the corners stocked with potions to replenish their mana, more voodoo masks hanging from the ceiling for... actually he doesn't know what they're for, and lastly a single unimpressive looking single-bed at the farthest corner beside a window. And there's a map hanging on the wall in front of it... wait, MAP?

Deadpool took the map plastered on the wall. It looked very old and torn but it doesn't look like it's missing anything. On the header of the map, there was a single world: Equestria





Fluttershy takes a seat back from everything Angel said, too shocked for any other reaction.

Zecora killed? oh my... oh my, oh my, oh my... this is not good. Zecora has lived in the Everfree Forest for so long she never thought Zecora would be in any danger there. It seems the forest IS more dangerous than she really thought before, but what does she do?

She was too out of focus to notice Angel sulking at a corner near the bed. He too is frantic and doesn't know what to do. She doesn't want to think of what happened in the forest... she can only imagine it's too much for him to take.

"A-Angel... we have to warn everypony..."

Angel turn to his beloved owner, he never seen her this shocked before. Her face stiffening and her eyes wavering, he knew she was about to cry and she did.

Quiet sobs accents the flowing tears from her eyes. She's always been quiet. Whether shouting in anger or laughing out loud, she's always been barely audible but somehow looking at her cry now, he's never seen anypony look worst.

She can't stand it. She wanted to mourn right there and then. Zecora's always been good to everypony, especially when her animals needed help. She always felt bad about being scared of her when she didn't understand her like everypony did. She always wanted to apologize to her but now that day will never come.

Angel just watched her cry. she's been crying for a while now mourning for Zecora. She didn't even bother to cover her face. He sat slumped, staring at her release her soft whimpers and overflowing tears.

Amidst all this, in the back of his mind Angel feels... unsafe... he can't explain it but he feels that they should leave now and ask for help, he wants to drag Fluttershy outside now but he doesn't want to disturb her in her sorry condition.

There are several knocks on the door downstairs.

They raise their head as soon as they heard the knock. Angel faced downstairs, puzzled as Fluttershy is.

"Hello?... Hellllooo?.... Hey I know it's kind of late but would you happen to have time and would like to learn about the church of Galactus and latter-day Silver apprentices?"

".... what?..." Fluttershy tries to make sense of the voice.

Angel's flight instinct kicked in, he's heard that voice.

"I said..." the voice is accompanied by the sound of the door blasted open.

"DO YOU HA-- oh" After kicking door, Deadpool noticed that the top half of the door is still closed "Nice... two doors in one huh?" Deadpool pushed open the top half of the door, entering with swords in both hands "HAVE YOU FOUND SILVER SURFER?!"

The intruder woke up the birds and squirrels sleeping below, followed a barrage of bird and squirrel cries all over the cottage. Fluttershy dart her eyes, scanning the room for a place to hide. Angel leaped out to the open window beside the bed.

"Angel!" Fluttershy screamed silently as she can as he escape... the window! 

She lift her wings, carrying her from the floor, but the pounding below grounded her back, the terror taking away her strength.

She can't fly! With all the shock she suffered, she's too weak to even lift her wings. Her teeth clatter and her shoulders can't stop shaking by themselves. The panic, clear from the sound the birds and squirrels making downstairs.


Before he could smell the bird feed, Deadpool scoured the room. The house is a goddamn compact zoo. Bird houses everywhere with birds of different colors, all the chirping he feels like he's in an audition for the cast of the next Angry Birds game.

"Any of you animals can speak? Give me a head's up if you can so I know which to kill... haha! head's up... I crack me up..."

He got here hoping for another lead. The map he had from the Tree House before had labels all over but the nearest of them all was labeled 'Fluttershy's Cottage'. How convenient that he would stumble upon a map this great! It practically spoon-fed him the way with several landmarks

But still... sheesh, really? a place called Ponyville? He better not be in a Zynga game, otherwise he might end up buying energy to kill talking animals for 0.99$! Staring at the clutter of animals doing nothing but animal things in the room, our hero Deadpool decided that the animals here are too stupid to even talk, pfft... stupid animals, looking at his right there's a staircase leading to the floor above

"Heellllooooo? Anyone up there? I'm a representative from PETA and I’m here to relieve you of all your neglected animals. Oh, and your life"


"Keep quiet Fluttershy, and whoever that pony is, they'll never notice you here" she whispered to herself while as she huddle out of sight.

Heavy footsteps ascending to her room getting louder, Fluttershy tried her best to be silent. She covered her mouth with her hooves so nopony can hear her. The uneasiness gradually increasing with every step she hear.

Her ears perk up... those doesn't sound like hoof steps... 

As if the pony isn't walking on all of its four hooves. With the sound of her room door opening, she closed her eyes hoping that she won't be seen.


Deadpool pushed aside the door to a room that was more tolerable and showed signs of intelligent life. There are no bird houses or squirrel holes that surround the vicinity. There's a normal cabinet, a normal looking window, and a normal looking bed that happens to have a... pink pony tail lying on the floor right beside the bed in full view as if there's something hiding under it.

Nevermind. No sign of intelligent life.

He push the bed, placing his foot on it's side, sliding it away to reveal a trembling yellow pony with pink mane and tail.

"Well, this is really convenient" he said with the tone a grade school teacher always reserve for the class dunce.

He waited for a moment for the pony to react. Its eyes were closed, its face covered with its hooves as it tremble like the cur that it is. He waited for another few seconds. 

"Uh.. Hello"

The little pony couldn't hear him, it's either too busy trembling or pretending to be dead... huh... playing dead huh? Good pony -- but too soon!

"Ah, fuck it" Deadpool raised his right sword as he towers over the oblivious pony. This feels very Friday the 13th, except instead of horny teenagers he's dealing with this shit.

The room was instantly greeted by an angry mob of birds entering from the open window of the room. It was so fast, there wasn't even enough time to hear the birds angrily approach the room, without even so much a blink of an eye Deadpool was surrounded by birds everywhere around his person

"HUH?! WHAT THE FU-- AAH!! AHH!!" he wasn't even able to finish his sentence as the birds angrily peck at him all over.


The birds bit the monster at every surface they can get their beaks on, they bit at his fingers, his arms, his thighs, his neck, the gap between his legs, everything. "HEY! AAGH! ARE YOU SERIO-- AAH! -- TWO CHAPTERS OF DICK JO-- OOH! -- JOKES?! AAAAAGH!!" the creature unintelligibly screamed as he tries to shoo all the birds around him but to no avail. At this point, Fluttershy finally looked up and saw the mob of her avian friends surround the screaming monster. Something about the intruder seems off to her

"... that... that's not a pony..."

Suddenly a roar entered the scene from the open door of her room, standing on it was a scowling brown bear standing on its hind legs - Her friend, Mr. Brown Bear!

The bear lunged itself toward the screaming intruder, dragging it across the room sending themselves outside punching through the room's wall. Landing on the hen house, the bear recovered almost instantly and pawed away at the creature threatening his friend. The birds followed suit from the room through the hole made by the bear and continued to attack the monster below.

What is going on?! There are so many things happening all of a sudden! She approached the large hole in her room and look over, checking her friends below.

It is... AMAZING! Every one is attacking the creature! She never thought her animals are capable of doing this... even her hens and rooster are joining in the fight pecking on places the birds aren't, the squirrels biting at everywhere else the other animals aren't attacking, the creature is barely even visible now! 


"THAT'S IT! NO MORE MISTER NICE MURDERER!" with a swift move he laid his two swords across his chest hacking a crisscross cut across the torso of the bear on top of him, deafening him in a roar of pain. In the exchange he reared his swords and pointed it at the creature - lifting up the blade he gut the beast all the way extending through its back. 

As the roaring bear stand up to back away from the pain, Deadpool pushed the impaled bear forward with a kick on its shin sending the animal lying on its back. Tightening his grip on the hilts he withdrew the swords from the beast, poised against the rest of the animals.

"YOU WANT ME?! BRING IT!!" he swings the two blades, hacking the birds in one motion, taunting the animals interrupting his kill. He kicked away a furious rooster and a few squirrels nibbling at his legs, slicing away several more birds around him, losing wings, cutting bodies in half. The speed guaranteeing seamless slices


"NO!!" Fluttershy screamed to the top of her lungs as she see the horror happening below. Raw. Guttural. She didn't even know she has this voice "NO!! NO! NONONONO!!"

She wants to stop all this but her mind turn blank. She watch as the monster hack away her birds... stomping on her squirrels "NOOO!!" she broke down on the spot as her hooves lose their strength, wailing as she see it BITE off one of the squirrel's tail in anger... how could anypony be capable of this?!

Amidst the horror, she feel a tug from her side. With tears still rushing she turn to Angel motioning her to go, ignoring the screeching of dying animals below. Angel begs her to leave, warn everypony of this monster. 

"W-We can't leave the animals! We lost Zecora, and we can't let this happen!"

Angel begins to cry, telling her to leave now. Telling her that the animals sacrificed themselves to save her, the animals loved her so much that they would gladly die for a chance to save her.

"HHHHRUUUUUAAAAA!!!!!--" A loud roar was silenced by a swift blade to the throat of the bear. The monster retreated and swung the swords together towards its neck - beheading the furred beast.

It stand breathing heavily before the carcasses of birds, squirrels, chickens, and butterflies she didn't notice before. Some animals are wounded, still alive, crying for help among the carcass, and burst stomachs. The forest is afraid of it. She has seen its true face.

The pen and the garden are extended with blood and the monster stand in the thick, staring above into hell. Staring down, it seem to reflect the vivid fear from her own eyes. 

She needs to run now. It's Angel tugging her at that point that set her back to reality. Quickly, she grabs him and dash downstairs away from the cottage as soon as possible.

She can't fly! She tries to lift her wings but she can't! Zecora dead, her friends dead, and now she's about to be killed by the same killer! She cup Angel with her wings and run towards Ponyville. The pain bites into her hooves, trying not to lose Angel on her back.



"COME BACK HEERE!!!!!" 

His voice was raw. Inflamed with bloodlust, he can taste it chasing after the pony with rising speed. The anger working on his body making him faster... flowing with precision. He feels it again... feeling like himself when he first started his mission. He did became weak, he knows that now... now he won't let it happen again.

{{Glad to see you finally understand}}

You're right. You've always been right. I should've listened to you.



She's running as fast as she could, but she can hear the monster's hoof steps closer and closer! "NO! PLEASE! DON'T COME ANY CLOSER!" somepony save her now! 

Suddenly she can feel Angel hugging her from behind... His tears drop on her coat as he hug her closer.

"Angel?... you... you love me?"



In an instant, the little white rabbit leapt towards Deadpool's face face blinding and biting him all over.

"WHAT THE--?!" He tried to grab hold of the rabbit but it then kicked his right eye in its socket "AH!" he lose his balance, tripping in the confusion and on his side.



"ANGEL!" She scream but she doesn't stop running, wanting to grab Angel right there and then but her hooves won't let her. With the distance rapidly increasing, she watch hopelessly as he fight the creature...

"Angel I love you too... I love you too Angel..."



Scurrying on the creature's head he fought for his life, he's not going to let this thing harm Fluttershy! as he nibble and stomp on the creature's face he felt a strong grip on his tiny body pulling him away from the monster. It stare him down with an horrendous scowl. He scowl back against its rotting face. He was not going to show this monster he's scared of it, he was not letting this monster harm Fluttershy!

"You little shit... This is all YOUR fault isn't it?"

He growl back. He won't let this thing scare him... he won't!

"It's your fault, I know it.... he told me it was your fault..." 

It's putrid breath attacks him as it lean closer, the gust flowing and escaping through his fur.

He felt the grip tighten on his body. The air escape from his lungs as he bite in retaliation. He twitch even more as another claw tighten even more, squeezing him to death!


Deadpool's hands started to tremble as he crush the tiny rabbit to death, watching it choke and scream. This thing doesn't deserve a quick death, that's what the voice told him, this thing deserve to die slowly and painfully. He continued for what seemed like forever as he watch it simultaneously gasp for air and cry... for a moment, it even started to look funny. 

Finally he can feel the crack of little bones crushing inside the little creature, screaming as its skeleton pierce its vital organs - the hysteria on the little shit's face, conscious of all this happening. The creature puke its innards and blood all over his hands, bringing a smile on Deadpool's face. He watched as the little creature gag in its own waste and slowly cease to move, its eyes bloodshot, the body finally go limp on his grip... 

"Hah... well... I feel all better now"









Pinkie Pie exits Sugar-cube Corner through the front door, roused from her sleep. A feeling, tugging at the bottom of her chest compels her to get out. Make sense of the night around her. 

The night is beautiful. Nopony in sight, as everypony is fast asleep. The sky shines a beautiful luster as the stars blanketing the horizon spark with a lithe grace. The moon's brilliance embrace the sky, drawing in the casual on-looker. 

"Hmm... I'm unusually perceptive tonight"

Yet the tranquility of the evening fades at the sight of a pony running. "Huh?" She's not sure what but she think it is a bit late to start jogging. Or too early. 

The silhouette becomes larger as it appears to be running towards her. Perhaps they are having trouble sleeping tonight as well? As the pony come closer it seem to look like.. Fluttershy! Oh it's Fluttershy! She didn't know Fluttershy jogs late at night. or too early in the morning.

"Hey! Fluttershy! I didn't know you jog late at night! or.. too early in the morning!"

She waves her down as Flutteryshy continue running.

"Fluttershy! HEY! Fluttershy! Flutt--" She stop at the sight of her weeping, almost stumbling over her steps "Fluttershy, what happened?"

Between tears she catch her breath from the chase, trying to tell her what happened "Pinkie...<sobs>... Monster... <sobs>... Zecora..."

"What's wrong?" she hug her and pat her back, resting her hooves on her back "Don't worry, it's alright, tell me anything"

"Pinkie... Zecora's dead"

Pinkie's eyes lit up. Then the realization dawns onto her.

"And my animals... they're..." Fluttershy's voice break even more"they're... they're gone!"

This was Pinkie sense.

"... And... my little Angel is dead, Pinkie..."
> Chapter 3: Old Merc Deadpool
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------






Chapter 3: Old Merc Deadpool


"So... what ah we gonna do tomorrow?"

"... I don't know. Any ideas, Scootaloo?"

"Nah... I got nothing..."

The soft voices whisked around the dark room echoing silently from a corner. Three little fillies, wide awake were lying still sharing a large bed brainstorming on what their next adventure would be

"Golly, we prob'ly done everything we could think of" the voice came from the yellow filly on the side of the bed. She slumped her head to her pillow, her red ponytail mane bounced to her side "... I reckon we may be outta options here girls"

"Let's not give up too easily Applebloom! We always figure out something every time we sleep over at your house" the higher pitched voice came from between the two. In the middle, the curly haired white filly held her left front hoof to her chin "hmm... how about snow sledding?"

"Sweetiebelle, we already did that last winter" the orange filly on the other side of the bed leaned to the window beside her in response, her rugged purple mane swept disappointingly "Remember before Winter Wrap-up? We almost ran over Applejack. And besides, it's not even winter now"

The three little fillies sighed in unison. Every day the trio always tried every different sport they can think of, hoping any of them will grant them their cutie marks... they never spent a day without trying a single idea. If they can't think of anything in the morning, they spend the night together at Sweet Apple Acres hoping to conjure an idea before sleeping. They always were able to think of something in the end every night... this maybe not one of those nights

Applebloom yawned, her eyelids lowering slowly by reflex "Ah'm pooped... maybe we just ought a sleep tonight girls.."

"Yeah... maybe we should... I’m sure we'll think of something in the morning.." Sweetiebelle lowered her hoof and her gaze, releasing her thoughts for tomorrow "Goodnight girls"

"G'night Sweetiebelle" Applebloom shut her eyes close and rested her shoulders on the soft mattress "G'night Scootaloo"

"Goodnight everyone" Scootaloo just stared outside the window, her body somewhat resist the need to tire itself out tonight. It's maybe because she's more worried than the other girls, apparently she doesn't like the fact that the Cutie Mark Crusaders weren't able to do anything today more than the other two... but she knows she needs her energy for tomorrow, if the girls are positive that they'll think of something tomorrow then she might as well be as optimistic as them. 

She continued to gaze outside the window, halfheartedly observing the path to Ponyville. There are a lot of trees covering the view to Ponyville, she can't see it from here but the way to town was curved around the large forest - not too large but enough to make the path to the farm somewhat almost three kilometers long, a very very long way which is probably good considering the fact during season the line waiting for the Apple family's cider would reach Ponyville before even the princess would raise the sun.

She should fall asleep any moment now... she always feel drowsy when things are uncool... she should feel VERY tired now... any moment now

"... huh?" Scootaloo nudged Sweetiebelle beside her with her gaze fixed outside "Girls, girls... I can see something in the forest"





"OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHH!! -- OLD MERC DEADPOOL FOUGHT A FARM - EEYYA EEYYA YYOOOOO!!"

Deadpool was walking on the way to wherever the yellow pony ran to. He felt all better now, he knew all that Anger Management thing is all bullshit - the best way to release your anger is to express it! Jack Nicholson has nothing on him, he's even singing to the tune of some nursery rhyme - completely uncaring of the possibility he might wake up someone this time of the night

"AND ON THAT FARM HE DROPPED THE BARN - EEYYA EEYYA YYOOOO!!"

He dropped the little rabbit he killed on the ground a while back. Rabbit innards apparently isn't very disgusting - or the other animals' innards actually, even the bear. Sure they look as gruesome as you'd expect but they didn't stink as much as let's say his own apparently vital organs. It's true you are what you eat, hack open a vegan and a regular person and anyone will know what he means. Still, it is a bit annoying to be covered in animal guts and blood... but he guess if he's gonna be a mobile slaughter house, he might as well look the part.

"WITH A HACK HACK THERE, AND A SLASH SLASH THERE -- KILLED THEIR ASS -- SPREAD SOME BLOOD -- DIDN'T GAVE A FUCK, FUCK!"

In the distance, he finally saw Ponyville... his guess anyway. All he could see was the top of a few buildings, a few roofs looks like it was designed from a merry-go-round. They should erect a sign somewhere here, something like 'Ponyville - Population: Soon to be zero, Primary Export: Animal corpses, Joint property of Zynga and Facebook'
You know this story is old when the joke is Zynga owns anything at all. Don't forget.
"OLD MERC DEADPOOL FOUGHT A FARM --"

[[EEYYA EEYYA YYOOOO!!! HAHA! that song is funny! I like it!]]

The voice of an unlucky excited little girl sprang from behind our lead singer. Disrespect his musical genius will she? Deadpool swiftly unsheathed his two swords, a new record time probably, and turned to his back to express his -- HOLY MOTHER OF HELL FREEZING OVER WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT THING?!

"HOLY SHIT! WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU?!"





"Pinkie Pie! wait! don't go too fast!" a half sob and shout came from Fluttershy, catching up to Pinkie Pie five feet away from her

Fluttershy and Pinkie Pie raced to Golden Oak Library as soon as she broke the news to her. She just can't take it anymore, with all the running for her life and the shock she had to endure tonight all she wants to do is rest. Pinkie Pie obviously has more energy than her tonight... then again she has more energy than anypony else all the time.

"Hurry Fluttershy! We can't waste any more time, we have to warn Twilight about this!" Pinkie turned to her friend, not stopping her trot to the library "We have to go as fast as we can! We're in a whoooole lot of trouble today!" her pink frizzy mane swept resisting the static current of the wind she's buzzing through.

"Pinkie!.." she inhaled a strong amount of wind "Do you know what's going on?" she tried to scream towards Pinkie between tired breaths. Pinkie didn't answer her question and just retreated her head from her direction. Something about Pinkie feels weird today, but she's too tired to think of it any further.

Finally they reached it! Golden Oak Library! Pinkie never felt this a huge situation than anything they had before, she'd just rush inside Twilight's room for all she cares right now but that probably wouldn't be very nice. She just had to resort to screaming and pounding on the door tonight.

"TWIIILIIIIIGHTT!!!! SPIIIKE!!! WAKE UP! WAKE UP!" Pinkie was screaming louder than usual, but this isn't a happy-excited-giggling-over-the-top kind of scream - this was a scared-of-an-imminent-danger-more-scary-than-anything-they-faced-before scream! and what's even more terrifying is she never screamed like this before! "TWILIIIIIGHT!!!! WAKE UP!! EVERYPONYYYY!!! WAAAKE UP!!"

Fluttershy finally caught up with Pinkie Pie, but her body really can't take it anymore and just gave up right there. Her hooves lost their strength and her consciousness faded as she take a step towards the library. Her body finally got it's much needed rest.

"TWIIILIIGHT!!! EVERYPONY!!!"

"What?! what?! What's going on?!" The door opened to reveal a frantic sleep-deprived purple baby dragon shouting in response to the screams. His baggy eyes centered on the pink mare, looking even more stressed than he is "Pinkie Pie, what's wrong? What happened?!"

"SPIKE! We need to wake up Twilight! It's a very very big emergency!!" the pink mare entered the library while she darted her head to each direction, looking for the lavender mare who could help her fix all this

"I'm awake Pinkie, and probably the rest of Ponyville too - what's wrong?" a lavender alicorn mare descended from the stairs leading from her room upstairs. Her head raised with poise, her hoof steps descending with grace she doesn't even look tired from her interrupted sleep. She has only been a princess for a while and already she's getting the hang of royalty. Her voice resounded with concern and stature almost in total contrast to Pinkie. Twilight is a natural at being a princess..

The lavender newly-formed alicorn wasn't actually asleep but studying with a new batch of books from Canterlot's Royal Library. Even after being crowned a princess she has no intention to leave her friends and decided to stay in Ponyville, a decision Princess Celestia knew would be made. Hearing Pinkie Pie scream below, she turned over to see Spike instantly awake by the first barrage of noise. She didn't even told her assistant to go down stairs, all he did was turn to Twilight in response and rubbed his eyes and by the second scream he quickly ran downstairs. She went and followed him below, the sleepiness instantly making it's kick in her when she stopped reading.

"TWILIGHT, IT'S HORRIBLE! FLUTTERSHYTOLDMETHATANGELBUNNYTOLDHERTHATTHERE'SAMONSTERONTHELOOSEANDITKILLEDZECORAINTHEEVERFREEFORESTANDTHENITWENTTOFLUTTERSHY'SCOTTAGEANDTHENTRIEDTOKILLFLUTTERSHYTOOBUT--"

"--WAIT! STOP!" Twilight interrupted Pinkie before she could say anything else. Pinkie is talking too fast for her to understand most of what she's saying, but something she heard struck the mare even more so than Pinkie's unexpected visit

"Did you say something... killed Zecora?!"

Pinkie nodded her head. And that moment Twilight and Spike's face drained of their color, their jaws involuntarily lowered, and their eyed grew centered on the Pink earth pony, their appearance out-stressing hers.

"A monster killed Zecora and its heading straight to Ponyville, Twilight!"

A monster?... killed Zecora?

"And Fluttershy also said that the monster killed her animals too!"

A... monster...

"And also that the monster killed Angel bunny!"

A MONSTER KILLED ZECORA





Deadpool was staring at the most terrifying thing he's ever seen so far. Living with a zombie-human-hamburger-mug like his made him sure that there's nothing more pants-shitting than his own face, except maybe seeing him in the nude but this thing looked like as if all the messed up shit in his head pledged their allegiance to Satan and tried to manifest itself into one of the cutest thing you know to purposely fuck with your childhood

That cute little girl voice sure did squat to make this thing appear child-friendly! It looks like the love child of a threesome with Beelzebub, a girly pony horse, and the scary as fuck girl from The Ring, only this thing has the fuckiest eyes he's ever seen. It's actually less like eyes and more like empty sockets giving it a carcass feel but inside those sockets he swears is the spirit of all the nightmares deep within the recesses of everyone's consciousness. Deadpool is now sure he apparently still has a soul because he can almost feel that thing sucking it from his chest with its hollow eye-holes and possesses one of the most ironic name ever.

"...P-Pinkie Pie?.. You're n-name is fucking Pinkie Pie?"

[[That's right! but other people call me Pinkamena or Zalgo Pinkie. Any will do, I’m not particularly choosy with my name]]

Pinkie Pie? if somebody thought this thing is cute and decided to give it a name like that, he's afraid of whatever that someone thinks is terrifying! It kind of resembles the pony he chased before in shape, but this thing is bloody red all over its body with a darker hue of long straight mane - this actually looks like a demon or something and somebody thought to name this Pinkie Pie? What in the actual fuck?

[[I can help you. You see, you and I are VEERRRYY alike]]

"Forgive me for not thinking of myself as someone who feeds on people's nightmares, but help me? Really?"

{{It's true. I can feel her essence is not unlike mine}}

[[Eeeyup! Your guide is right, me and him are almost the same entity!]]

"Wait, hold on - you can hear him?"

{{Yes, she can hear me. She won't harm you, we both want the same thing... similarly at least}}

[[Allow me to explain everything --]]

Deadpool then lose his vision, like something blinded him and - oh wait, he can see again. That was fast. But he's not near Ponyville anymore but some... demon dimension or something. There's nothing here save for a school chalkboard placed in front of him with Pinkie Pie on the side wearing frame-less glasses and holding a stick pointing it to - wait a minute how can that thing hold a stick? it doesn't even have fingers it's just a regular pony hoof... anyway, Deadpool is apparently sitting on a school chair too small for comfort. There's nothing else to mention except that the floor is red all over the place and the scenery is nothing but some distorted red and black shapes.

[[You see Wade, this is the Universe... or the universe here where you are now anyway]] she's pointing to a white small dot on the center of the board

[[It aaall started with this special toy intended for little girls: My Little Pony!]]

She held down a retractable roll of paper attached at the top of the board, and it revealed a picture of a toy pony. Its design look very simple and yet detailed like it came from the 80's and beside it was a logo 'My Little Pony' it looked simple too, detailed with red at the edges and the letters themselves colored in pink

[[You see, demand for the toys wasn't very high - but the guys in business has faith in this franchise, so they made a TV show on par with the toys]]

The picture on the paper transformed into a girly drawing of several eighties era ponies, and the logo 'My Little Pony' plastered at the top

[[The show - surprisingly was a HUUUGE HIT. but more like a one-time millionaire because for some reason demand started to dwindle again.]]

The picture transitioned into several styles of old era ponies, all plastered with the logo 'My Little Pony'. Deadpool was getting bored and is beginning to lower his gaze on the figure

[[And it went on again and again and again and again, they even made a movie once when the love for the franchise was noticeable - but not high, and still extremely looooww.]]

The picture on the paper faded out, revealing nothing on the rolled paper. Deadpool suppressed a yawn, wow the classroom aura really took its place on him, he actually thought to himself he can't wait for recess

[[Several years passed and the higher ups practically gave up on the idea. They were through! The most they could hope for is to at least be able to sell the toys and bags and pencils and pencil cases and notebooks in their warehouse just so they can empty it... demand for My Little Pony dwindled and dwindled and dwindled...]] the demon mare's voice was lowering to the tone of disappointment [[The doomed universe would finally to be able to fade away... you see, when universes like ours lose attention from their progenitors, they begin to fade away. For a universe to completely disappear in existence, there has to be absolutely NO ONE to care for them!]]

"... must... stay... awake..."

The large rolled paper on the chalkboard rolled itself back to the top, again revealing the white dot on the center before. The sound managed to gain a part of Deadpool's diminishing attention span

[[Everything was going well! until SOMEPONY had to -- I mean, SOMEONE had to have a flash of genius!]] she then pointed to the white dot on the center of the chalkboard [[THIS - is the first My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic universe! It's the show you're into right now, here, in this show, is where you are, but not particularly the first universe but still!]]

"Teacher, may I go to the bathroom?"

[[... ... ... okay!]] the creepy mare gave a wide grin before a large sound of static entered Deadpool's ears when he felt the demon mare enter his subconscious...









Do not forget

"AAAAAAAHHHH!!!" the inconspicuous face of the demon pony invaded his vision, the vision of her accompanied with static overshadowed his entire consciousness. He felt lost in space as if he's floating in his own world, her non-existent eyes impale themselves on his apparently legit soul. It was a few seconds of this terror but it's apparently enough to make him urinate all over himself. His heart was beating furiously as he look below himself in shame

"DON'T DO THAT! YOU'RE GONNA GIVE ME A HEART ATTACK!... n-not t-that I can't g-grow another one if it e-explodes!"

The blood-red pony just giggled in response [[Silly Wade! This lesson is important right now and will be crucial to your development as a person - no, really! but do tell me if the need to go wee-wee or poo-poo comes up. Do you still feel the need to go to the bathroom?]]

"NO! n-no, i-i feel all fine now, thank you for a-asking ma’am." he faced back to her direction with his attention skyrocketed all the way up on the topic at hand, eager to not get another experience like that.

[[Good. Now this -]]she pointed her stick again to the white dot [[- is the first universe of this show. sustained by only a few episodes, which is expected but there came an unnecessary massive amount of information explosion around the end of the first season of this show -]] the white dot on the center immediately sprang several short lines from all directions, the ends of which sprouted white dots identical with the one on the center

[[- the demand, the interest, the hope, the love gradually grew in size! being more popular than any of its predecessor universes, thus creating additional universes!]] the dots on the chalkboard continued to extend lines and sprout white dots all expanding from the center [[People began to take genuine interest, not just little girls - grown men and women adore the franchise and with it made their own stories]] the board just continue to fill with white chalk, not stopping even for a moment

[[With every episode, the multi-verse just kept expanding. With every convention, the multi-verse just kept expanding. With every fan animation, the multi-verse kept expanding! With every comic, the multi-verse kept expanding! With every fan fiction the multi-verse kept expanding! The multi-verse kept expanding! The multi-verse kept expanding! The multi-verse! The multi-verse! The multi-verse! Expanding! Expanding! Expanding! To the point that it continues to keep expanding forever and ever and ever embedded to its progenitor - never to fade away...]] The chalkboard was completely covered in white, with absolutely no vacant space for white chalk dust to occupy [[any questions?]]

Deadpool was staring blankly at the chalkboard. Admittedly, nothing of all she said entered his mind but he shook his head as soon as he mildly heard a gibberish of 'any questions' a reflex every grade schooler learn at a young promising age

[[GOOD! I was born into one of these universes]] she pointed at a random spot on the board [[I started out as a simple Pinkie Pie almost exactly the real Pinkie in every way!]]

"Wait - hold on, what do you mean the real Pinkie? are you a fake Pinkie? what's the real Pinkie?"

[[VERRY observant of you, Wade! Tell me, do you know what a creepy pasta is?]]

"The only pasta I know is the one you cook into spaghetti. No, I don't know what a creamy pasta is" 

The mare only giggled at him [[You are very silly!... No... I was not born to look like what you see me now, this is a result from a gift given to me! Someone birthed me with the skill and desire to kill my fellow ponies and use their body parts as ingredients for my desserts - most notably my cupcakes]]

"Wow. Well, totally not one to talk here. Although the thought of eating my kill will probably only come up if it's say a mutant chimichanga... otherwise, well..."

[[OOOH! I love chimichangas!]]

"Really?"

[[Yes! I even once thought to mix it with cherries and wondered what it would taste like. What should I name it even? Cherrychanga? Chimicherry? Chimicherrychanga? I never did figured that out.. but anyway back to the topic at hand. That universe extended into several universes but since I’m a being - like you - also gifted with the ability to 'break the fourth wall' I was able to work around my adjacent universes and explored wherever I want.]]

"You mean like what I did with my adjacent universes? Except instead of just killing everyone you're killing everyone and THEN turn them into maniac fodder?"

[[Yes! Very good Wade, you are performing well in this class! I feel so proud of you!]]

"I feel like going vegan"

[[Haha! anyway, long story short every universe I explored has improved me in some way. Like the consciousness of whoever created those universes sent their darkest energy towards me. In some universes I don't kill ponies like I used to. Actually, I can't explain what I really do! What I did to you earlier before you wee-weed on yourself is called a Jump Scare, it's one of my many special talents. I can't explain to you the rest of what I do, it's an air of mystery thing]]

"I feel sick... like I never want to eat another taco ever again. To think that what created you is a creamy pasta -  what, am I gonna find out soon a creamy pasta or a shiny taco is what created the evil voice in my head and ate my two other? ... Hey wait a minute here, where were you able to eat a chimichanga anyway?"

[[And that concludes our origin lesson!]]

Deadpool was blinded again with darkness "AAAAAH!!! Sweet vision how I treasure you so, more than ever! return to me and give me sight beyond sight! oh, thanks"

He looked around him and noticed that he's surrounded by trees again. "What the? Am I back in the forest? you little douche! why'd you sent me he--AAAAH!!" he turned to his side and saw the demon mare dangerously close to him, trying to suck his soul again. She held a hoof to her mouth, signaling him to quiet down... maybe? this thing doesn't have an index finger

[[Shhh! be quiet! I don't want you waking up everypony!]]

{{Pinkie Pie. Go explain to him how we got here and why we're here}}

Deadpool shifted his head around as if the source was somewhere other than inside his head "Go tell me? Are you telling me you knew all along why we're here?"

[[He didn't know at first. I told him earlier.]]

"You did? but I didn't hear you-"

[[I was the one who brought you here Wade.]] Deadpool fixed his gaze on her, for some reason it still feels like his soul is being sucked {{She was the presence I felt when we were in the abyss. She pulled us here to destroy this universe. Theoretically, we landed in the forest because it was the ideal place for us to sneak into this universe}}

Well... this DOES answer a lot of questions.. except... "... But why? Why bring me here? You seem capable of doing it yourself, why did you dragged me here instead?"

{{She never destroyed a single universe, at least like the way we have. She's not unbound like us, she doesn't have much freedom as we do}}

"What? look, I’m getting tired of not understanding a lot lately"

[[Explaining things can get boring and I’m very bored now really. Just look at it this way, you get a step closer in destroying all of fiction, and I get to finally see for myself a universe being destroyed! It's a win-win for both of us, see?]]

"Okay, just one last question" the demon mare raised her pony ears, ready to listen "Why do you want to see this universe destroyed?"

[[Because it'll be fun, silly!]]





Around this world, there's only one thing that can really harm him. One thing that would stop him from continuing his quest to give the sell-out corporations and writers the big fuck you from all of literature.

The Elements of Harmony. Real scary name, wooo. but she and his guide assured him that that was the most powerful weapon in this world, capable of either destroying him completely or sending him away from this universe making his first job is to disarm it. The wielders of the elements are six ponies all with their respective element: 

Applejack for the element of Honesty, a strong farmer pony that lives in Sweet Apple Acres on the other side of Ponyville. 

Fluttershy for the element of Kindness, she was the pony Deadpool stumbled on the cottage earlier.. apparently he already fucked up when he lost her because the cast from National Geographic went psycho and tried to kill him, now he probably doesn't have time before she warns the others. 

Rainbow Dash for the element of Loyalty, physically this would be a challenge to kill seeing is that she's a very fast flier capable of breaking the sound barrier in seconds. Best approach would be stealth, preferably while she's asleep - the problem with that tactic would be getting on top of the sky on her home which is basically just a bunch of clouds morphed into a house. 

Rarity the element of Generosity, should be easy to kill, no other comment. 

Pinkie Pie - the totally non-demon version as the element of Laughter. Hmm, someone definitely isn't into jokes when they decided to spawn the demon Pinkie Pie from a creamy pasta - into sane jokes at least. 

And lastly, Twilight Sparkle the element of Magic. A newly crowned princess, there's little limit on what she can do because she's basically that - the element of Magic. She probably could conjure a meteor shower for all he knows, best try to avoid as possible if you value keeping your vital organs intact. 

The evil Pinkie Pie brought him to a forest in front of Sweet Apple Acres, the most logical choice would be to kill Applejack, since her farm is conveniently located at the other side of Ponyville - well away from Golden Oak Library where Fluttershy most likely went to. 

In theory, if one wielder of the element dies the power of the other elements would be nil thus the Elements of Harmony would be impossible to execute since only the full power of the elements would be able to successfully summon it. In theory anyway, there's a possibility that a wielder of an element could be replaced by another - very unlikely to happen - but still a possibility or that the Elements of Harmony could be summoned even without all the elements in power. Basically the gist of what they explained to him is that the universe might act cheap or something because that's just how stories work, even more if the audience demands it - something comic book characters are all too familiar with, one of the reasons why he's killing the multiverse in the first place.

There were a lot of trees to pass through on the way, but the path the demon gave him was right. There it is, Sweet Apple Acres. It looks peaceful, nothing much to describe the place except for a large red house, a tilled plot of land on the side, Apple trees all around behind it, and a fence because property is property. This may suggest that occupants are a bunch'o red necks

"... huh?" Scootaloo nudged Sweetiebelle beside her with her gaze fixed outside "Girls, girls... I can see something in the forest"

Deadpool just stood there. Well, here he goes. He takes a deep breath and casually walked towards the red house

"... oooohh - Old Merc Deadpool saw a farm..."

The Elements of Harmony, huh?

"eeeyya... eeeyya... yyooo..."
> Chapter 4: Satsui no Hadou, Shun Goku Satsu
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------






Chapter 4: Satsui no Hado, Shun Goku Satsu


"Should we wake her up?" The purple dragon motioned to the alicorn, pointing at Fluttershy with her body surrendering to the comfort of Twilight's cushions. 

Earlier, Twilight used her levitation spell to softly place Fluttershy on her own bed. The butter-yellow mare  collapsed before she could enter the library tree house completely devoid of strength. Twilight and Spike were there at the room with Fluttershy limp on the bed where they left Pinkie Pie downstairs to relax

"I deeply regret doing this since she is obviously going through a lot tonight... but we have no choice. We need to hear from Fluttershy herself how the monster looks like, and hopefully she'll be able to tell us more"

The green purple scaled dragon took this as his cue and shook the comatose-like mare slowly. Still asleep. He shook her again, a little harder this time. Still won't wake up. Not so much a twitch or a sigh or anything. Spike's not sure if Fluttershy is usually this hard to wake up or what, but looking at her sleeping right now made him feel guilty. If not for the barely noticeable rising of her chest he'd think she's.. well ...

"It's no use... she won't wake up, Twilight" He turned to the equally worried alicorn. None of them have taken the situation very well "... do we write a letter to Princess Celestia?"

"... No. It's better that we learn more about the situation before we alert the princess, but Pinkie did mention that the monster tried to harm Fluttershy and killed her animals... i'm-i'm not sure if it's time to alert the princess now, but we have to tell the girls."

Both of them never turned their gaze away from the sleeping pegasus. They've seen Fluttershy break a lot of times before but not like this. As much as they want to hear more, they don't want to disturb her any further. They can't imagine how hard it must be to lose many friends in such a short time, and this is Fluttershy they're thinking about - she'd cry if somepony even looked at her bad enough - it's hard to even think about how she must be taking all this.

"Spike, stay here with Fluttershy while me and Pinkie tell the others" the princess didn't wait for an answer and proceeded to descend from the room. The girls have to know. She tried to compose herself, they'll have to mourn for everyone later - they have to attend to this matter right now.

Halfway down from upstairs, she shot a look at Pinkie Pie sitting on the carpet at the center of the room. Pinkie Pie looked back at her with her swollen eyes, drooped ears and more-than-usual unkempt mane. She looked like she aged as her trademark vibrant smile seem absent tonight. Her own state not any better than hers as she approach her troubled friend

"Pinkie. Let's go wake Rarity up"

Pinkie Pie slowly nodded in remark. She doesn't feel like talking tonight. She had a new pinkie sense earlier. It didn't made her feel any better, none of all this made her feel any better. She's been sad a lot of times before, but never like this. 

This is the first time a friend of hers died. She even remembered the time she held a Welcome to Ponyville party for Zecora and apologized to her for being a scaredy-pony. Oh Zecora... and to think your birthday is only 48 days from now.

"Are you coming Pinkie?"

Her focus turned towards Twilight standing in front of the door, waiting for her to answer. She knew they'll have to be sad for another time.

".. Yes.. let's go Twilight"

Time against their side, they trotted to Carousel Boutique as fast as they can. When they appeared at the library Pinkie mentioned that Fluttershy sobbed earlier that the monster chased her to Ponyville and Angel gave his life to give her time to escape. By now, it could only be a matter of time before they or anypony gets attacked. Twilight briefly thought that they should split up so she could warn Rainbow Dash but abandoned it. It's too dangerous, besides Rainbow's cloud is so far away. They'll just have to stick together to warn Rarity.

The path to Carousel Boutique, Rarity's home and workshop was a long way off from the library near the town square and right beside the park. Judging by the distance of Fluttershy's cottage, Sugarcube corner, and the library - if there is a monster that's been after Fluttershy earlier then it would have been here already even if you take in account the time Angel saved - it could be attacking Rarity right now! Twilight is very glad she left Spike with Fluttershy.





At this time of night from Applebloom's room they can't even see the silhouette of the Cutie Mark Crusaders Clubhouse, but there was something in the distance that Scootaloo's sharp eyes followed

"I don't see anything" Sweetiebelle pouted, sitting up on the bed scanning the view from the window. Beside her was Applebloom doing the same thing from her side of the bed. "Yeah, me either. Are you tryin' to scare us or somethin'?"

Scootaloo is SURE there's some weird shape approaching the barn. Eye coordination is key to avoid obstacles when you're zipping at very fast speeds. That said, she always trust her sharp eyes and it's quick reflexes - it's what makes her good using the scooter. Whether it's jumping over haystacks, avoiding moving ponies, or shooting through ramps - coordinating your senses is what makes you accomplish all these with almost no effort, but the most important of them of course is seeing them beforehand... and she's seeing something beforehand

"I'm serious girls! There's something walking towards here! - look! THERE! Near the clubhouse!"




"Ah, look at this - another tree house! And the right variety too" Deadpool kept approaching the farm as he spot one tree adorned with a small house supported by the trunk with several polished stairs "... This tree house actually looks nice. It even has a watch tower." Now he's sure the people who live on the farm are definitely red necks seeing is that  the nearest neighbor is several meters away and equipped with a watch tower complete with a telescope probably intended to spy on them having incestuous sex. Even from this distance the windows on the side of the large house is pretty noticeable, if only he had a sniper rifle right now he could snipe the shit out of Applesack or whatever its name is

"... Why.. do I feel like I stand out?"




"There! it's right beside our clubhouse!" Scootaloo pointed her hoof at the direction of the barely visible clubhouse

Applebloom's eyes slightly grew "... Ah can see it! There IS something there!"

"There is? I still can't see it. What is it?" Sweetiebelle shifted her head to Applebloom and then Scootaloo waiting for an answer

"... I .. I can't make it out yet, but it doesn't look like somepony we know... or a pony at all.." with that said, the two ponies kept their gaze on the creature, Sweetiebelle still trying to spot the anomaly




"Hmm. You know, I’m getting a feeling this may not be the right entrance" He kept his pace towards the barn, a bit less confident than before and wishing he really had a sniper rifle.

{{We're approaching the side of the barn. Of course it's not the right entrance}}

"That's not what I mean"

{{I know what you mean}}



"What the...?" Scootaloo can see the shape clearly now... but she can't explain what it is

"What the hay is that?" Applebloom was next to clearly see the strange... 'thing' "I-It looks like a... a..."

"HEY! I CAN SEE IT NOW! I SEE IT!" Sweetiebelle absentmindedly shouted to everypony when she finally saw the creature, Scootaloo and Applebloom immediately faced her with shock, surprised at her lack of tact ".. Oops.."

Deadpool braced himself when he heard the scream from the barn, fixing his gaze on a second floor window where three ponies hidden well in the dark room became only noticeable because of the shriek.

"Well. So much for stealth... pretty pathetic alarm though - but I guess 'em rednecks ought'a improvise eh?"

{{Just go already}}

"Okay chums, let's do this-" almost instantly unsheathing his swords, he ran towards the barn - stealth being pointless now he screamed the most bad-ass battle cry ever made "LEEEEEEROOOOOOOOOY JEENKIIIIIIINS!!"

"IT'S A MONSTER!! AAAAHH!!!" Scootaloo screamed followed by the rest of the cutie mark crusaders waking up everypony in the barn.

Deadpool was sprinting to the barn, pumped up with adrenaline he finally reached and jumped over the white fence surrounding the barn while the ponies kept screaming. Pacing forward he lunged through the narrow glass window below the sophisticated red neck alarm system, after a front roll he recovered his momentum using only his legs "Oh my god, Leeroy just went in!"

"WHAT IN TARNATION?!" Applejack jumped at the noise of glass shattering and somepony landing below. She was woken up by the screams of the crusaders at Applebloom's room across hers "WHAT THE HAY IS GOING ON THERE?!"

Big Mac's eyes just went up. A blank expression on his face, the sound of glass shattering made his eye narrow.

Looking up from his roll, he immediately saw a withered light green pony with a hairstyle that would trump a cafeteria lady's soundly asleep on a rocking chair making old-lady-sleeping sounds -- whew it even smells like old lady here! whoever thought naming a deodorant Old Spice definitely haven't smelled an old person before! Deadpool has more faith in the Axe-effect. With a commercial like theirs it's hard not to be convinced

He stood up from his fall, towering over the sleeping old pony - oh look, she has a picture of a pie on her flank, that's a really stupid tattoo to have.

"HEY! Are you Applesmack?!"

The old-timer just snored back at him. Who could stay asleep with all the noise around the house? Annoying brats screaming upstairs, a window just shattered in front of it, a psychopath screamed at it, this one really need to see where it messed up in life

Applejack rushed out of her room to see Big Mac just outside of his as the same time as her, they both darted to the direction of the stairs

"Giving me the silent treatment eh?" he pointed his blade at the chest of the snoring hag and pushed the hilt forward, the blade cut through the pony and the chair - its eyes darted open now and it's jaw dropped but no sound came up "Oh, NOW you're going to pay me attention?!" the old pony just stared in disbelief as its diaphragm fail to work from shock

"Alright whoever you are, you messed with the WRONG--" Applejack stopped descending in the middle of the stairs as she see a tall zombie pony-like creature stabbed Granny Smith, her blood staining the blade leaking from her back "--GRANNY SMITH!"

Big Mac saw the creature and Granny Smith stabbed - he has no words.

"Don't mind granny here kids! She's just having a heart-attack!" Deadpool pulled his blade out of the old creature while twisting a bit to its side cutting through a valve of the heart and ripping a lung making blood fountain out of the open wound. "Now which one of you is Applehack?!"

Applejack and Big Mac stared numbly at the creature while blood from Granny Smith's chest sprinkled onto it - it was a horrible sight, like an amalgamation of some Nightmare Night costume and several zombie ponies. Applejack can't fight this thing - she went past Big Mac as she instinctively run towards the crusaders and get them all out of here. Big Mac followed after her sister.

"HEY! COME BACK HERE!" he rushed towards the start of the staircase "God damn, it Leeroy!"

"KIDS! JUMP THROUGH THE WINDOW!" still screaming, the crusaders almost instantly complied as Applejack enter the room fearing for all of their lives. Scootaloo, Applebloom and Sweetiebelle were the first to exit the barn through their open window as they all land on the dirt a floor below followed by Applejack narrowly avoiding landing on the fillies. Big Mac leaned outside to check if they are alright.

"Is everypony okay?!" Applejack quickly frisked the girls to see if they were hurt, Sweetiebelle's hoof was sprained but everypony else is fine "Okay, let's go! let's go e--" Big Mac hasn't jumped yet. She faced the window and saw Big Mac still standing there "Big Mac! Jump already!"

Big Mac just shot her a look. She didn't like it "BIG MACINTOSH! GIT OUT ALREADY!!"

"WAAAAAAAAA!!!--" the assassin screamed a high pitched cry a power metal lead singer would be proud of, ready to make pony shish kebab when he was suddenly crashed by a chest-shattering buck to the stomach sending him away from the room

"BIG MACINTOSH! ARE YOU ALRIGHT?!" Applejack hoped that her brother was safe when she heard the monster's interrupted scream. Everypony was equally worried and screamed for Big Mac to run away "BIG MAC!"

"CONSARNIT EVERYPONY!! GIT TO PONYVILLE AND WARN THE OTHERS!!" this was one of the few times Big Mac said a full sentence. Everypony was taken aback but Applejack was not going to leave her big brother

"NO! We ain't leaving without ya Big Mac!"

"Second attempt!-WAAAAAAA!!--" the attacker's solo was interrupted yet again with a powerful buck to the chest, sending him through into Applejack's room.

"APPLEJACK! LEAVE! PLEASE!!" the plea bellowed from the window, ponies a mile away could hear him.. is this why Big Mac is so quiet? because he's so... loud?

Leave?.. Leave her brother with this monster? She.. She can't do that!

"Applejack! We'll have to warn everypony! let's go!" Scootaloo was first to gather her senses from the groaning fillies

"NOO! This is my brother we're talkin 'bout!" the farmer pony scream's was so loud she practically blew at the little filly

"Applejack! LEAVE! This is yer big brother tellin' ya!"

... Big brother...

...

... Okay big brother... okay...

Hating her decision, Applejack grabbed Applebloom and Sweetiebelle laying them on her back "Let's go everypony!" Scootaloo reached for her scooter parked at the entrance of the farm and followed after Applejack's fast trot towards Ponyville

... Oh Big Mac, why did ya tell us to run?

Big Macintosh faced back to the direction of the creature that killed Granny Smith through a large hole on Applejack's room. He kicked the creature there. It has been a long time he used his strength like this

He slowly trudged to the wreckage, hearing a groan somewhere in the room. He went through the hole to see the creature lying on its back a short distance away from the wreck.

"WOOOSH!" the creature immediately sprang up and tried to stab him with his right sword. Big Mac just leaned his body from the left and slammed his left hoof to the creature's right claw, sending the blade away from its grasp and bludgeoned his right hoof to the side of the creature's face making it topple to its side. He stepped on the other blade released from the creature's claw from his blow and slid it opposite of them across the room. The creature then swiftly pulled out a shorter blade from a pocket and lunged it towards him with its right claw but it was deflected again by his left hoof. He quickly raised both his front hooves and brought them down on the creature's abdomen, the weight cracked the wooden floor. He raised them again and slammed it harder on the creature its blood littering his hooves while the floor weakened again. He raised them yet again and brought them down even harder, this time sending them both to the barn below.

"... ugh... what the hell..?" Deadpool gathered his senses from the fall, the horse nowhere in sight. Wow, that thing hits like a train, looks like he'll be in for a challenge. Sitting up, he notice a large wooden wheel barrow in mid-air coming towards him. OH SHI--

Deadpool didn't have time to react as he was sent away with the wheelbarrow thrown out of the barn. Toppling through the fence and rolling several times on the dirt the wheelbarrow rolled onto him in place. Recovering from the throw, he tried to push away the gigantic cart as he notice something distant on the sky on top of where he is. Something audible came from the object 

"金剛國裂斬!!"

... wait, WHAT?

Big Mac landed through the wheelbarrow and on the creature like a comet, his front hooves impaling the creature sending a shock wave extending from the large Farm Pony, the force meteorizing the ground, debris of dirt and wood flung away from them, and the creature's blood splattering on him and around them.

"... what the..." the murderer coughed up its own blood "... fuck?... just when things are starting to make sense... Morpheus I think I’m ready for the blue pill..."

"WHY DID YA KILL GRANNY SMITH?!"

The assassin can feel the horse's breath on his face as its head drew closer. It stinks... actually, he takes that back his breath smells awesome... he's being platonic

"AND WHY ARE YA TRYIN TO KILL APPLEJACK?!"	

"Nice accent, Clint Eastwood!" Deadpool spitted on the red horse littering its cheek, next thing he know he's flying in midair again hitting a tree that stopped his tracks. He slumped on the ground with his side, his chest open, and his intestines scattered from the blow. "Wow... what the hell, man..." blood was streaming from his mouth "... are you gonna tell me you were created by a creamy pasta too?... because... I might not have the guts to hear that..."

It amuses him. Applejack is a hard working pony and he can count on her to run the farm by herself, but nobody will argue that he's the backbone of this business, almost literally. Has nopony ever wondered how he can buck entire hectares of apples all by himself?

"This town ain't big enough for the both of us!" Deadpool then pulled out two guns and aimed at the literally red necked horse, trying to work up his strength to pull the triggers. Wow, he almost forgot he has guns. This senseless killing is working its way on his common sense

"..." the creature was pointing two small... black boxes at him.. but what in tarnation are they?

"Yeah, just stand there thanks. BANG BANG BANG!!" finally summoning a little strength he was able to pull the triggers repeatedly, but because for a lack of oh I don't know blood and internal organs his aim was a little off.

The black boxes were... shooting something at him. It's like there are things exploding in it, one of those things grazed his cheek and went deep in his left shoulder "AAHH!" he let out a loud but low moan, losing strength from his left. He high-tails it back to the barn while the boxes keep shooting at him, ignoring the pain and feeling the fast explosions zip around him

"YES! RUUUN!! skedaddle outta this 'ere neighborhood ya coward!" Deadpool followed suit with his intestine dangling out of his stomach, not ceasing his fire on the fleeing horse

{{Leave that thing! We're wasting time!}}

"What? NO! my large intestine is stretched out here, and besides my swords and knife is back at that house" Deadpool just kept firing at the horse. He's not particularly proud of his aim but he still get to scare the karate-cowpony "YEES! YEEESS! I HAVE UNLIMITED BULLETS! FEAR THE POWER OF LAZY COMIC BOOK WRITING!"

Big Mac finally took cover at the barn, the wooden walls not providing him any sanctuary until he concealed himself on a large haystack at the side. The loud explosion sounds finally stopped as he hear the hoof steps of the monster attacking him in the barn

"Where'd you go huh? I know you're around here because I saw you run in!... wait, then why am I asking where'd you went? Oh, don't you just love chase clichés?"

The farmer pony took a peek out from the haystack large enough to hide him. He saw the creature walking around the barn inspecting the hole from Applejack's room dragging it's intestine along and littering its blood all over the place

Haystack. What a pathetic place to hide into. Woo, Deadpool's looking for this horse and the haystack over there sure doesn't stand out! "WELL. I give up! You obviously vanished into thin air, NO WAY you could be in this barn hiding somewhere.... in fact, I’ll move in slow motion now for dramatic effect while I’m shooting my guns at this particular haystack to vent out my frustration" he points his weapons at a particular haystack

"I'm going to murder the fuck out of this haystack. Right aboooooooooooooooooooooouuuuuuuuuut nnoooooooooow!"

Immediately he was being strangled by his own intestine. The horse came out from the haystack behind him and wrapped his neck from behind with his own shit pipe - FUCK! he faced the wrong haystack!

"Hrrey! -ACK!- I wranted -aark!- to strangrer ryou wih my intestrine! -RRACK!- NRO FAIR!!"

Big Mac wrapped another loop at the creature's neck to avoid the intestine from tearing apart. The creature dropped the black boxes and tried to release the choke from its neck using its claws but he was too strong for it. The grip would not lessen no matter how much the creature struggle - this thing killed Granny Smith! He's not going to let her die without justice

He just kept trying to lessen the grip from his shit tube - crap, of all the ways he'd die this will definitely stand out for a long time. He can feel a meme coming up

Finally the creature just seem to... stop struggling "Blerck! Arm gorna drieee!! Blerck..." it sticks out its tongue to the side and just stopped moving against his grip. Big Mac let go of the creature, letting it fall down to the floor. Something was not right... but maybe the lack of stomach finally had its effect on the monster... but still...

".... something ain't right around here..."


Is this it? Is this the end of our hero, Deadpool?... well... maybe it is.. ah fuck it, no more cliffhangers or fancy words - Deadpool's dead, Equestria is safe, deal with it. End of story




THE END




Written by iamthemithras



CAST



Deadpool as himself


Evil Deadpool Consciousness as himself


Zecora as herself


Angel Bunny as himself


Fluttershy as herself


Bird#1 as itself


Bird#2 as itself


Bear#1 as Mr. Brown Bear


... you get the idea




Special Thanks to



Cullen Bunn for the Deadpool Killogy


Lauren Faust for My Little Pony, I guess




No actual zebra, bear, bird, squirrel, chicken, rooster, bunny, pony were harmed in the making of this Fan Fiction



THANKS FOR READING!











"Gotcha!"

Still lying on the floor, the creature grabbed the boxes unluckily within his reach and fired at him hitting all over his chest from under.

"AAAGH!" Big Mac didn't have enough time to let out a low scream as the explosions projectile through his body, escaping through his chest and hooves making him instantly fall down to the floor.

He never felt pain this hard before.. NEVER... plowing through the fields right now with the rusty plow would be nothing compared to what he's sitting through now... he can't die now..

"I can't believe you fell for that one haha!" the creature said between laughs, lifting itself from the ground. This thing was dead! DEAD! He saw it just die from his grasp.. albeit a.. unique death, but it died! didn't it?!

"You really expected to strangle me to death with my own gut? wahaha!!" the creature was standing in front of him taunting while his limp body lay on his side, spurting out blood from all over to the ground. "Do you even know how soft intestines are? Sure, I wanted to strangle you with it but only to piss you off with the smell!"

"Wh-Who.." the horse coughed up some blood "What... are ya..."

"Me? Well I think it's kind of late for an introduction but alright. My name is Deadpool. Like DEAD as in you will be and POOL as in of your blood" as the creature talk, he finally notice the open hole on the creature somehow... shrinking? like its growing back its lost flesh

"I have a healing factor - which means I heal like mad, man. Shoot me with a bullet, the wound will heal itself. Pulverize me with a giant hammer, my bones will heal way better than when you first tried milk. Somehow find a way to melt me, I’ll just reappear like Death has some sort of boner for me... ahaha! that one's no metaphor by the way"

He can't end like this... Granny Smith was the only one who knows what to do best in situations like this.. she was the one who always calmed his anger when he needed to

"I used to be a bad guy. Then I turned into a good guy. Then I turned into whatever I am now, which is a good guy from my perspective."

Granny Smith isn't here anymore... there's no one here except him and this monster

"You however have some explaining to do. I heard you speak Japanese a while ago, I can speak Japanese you know - Deddopūru hentai seiyoku desu! - see? and I don't say it in kanji either so people can pronounce it with me you clusterfuck"

It's been a long time since he tapped to this power. He's tried his best to avoid tapping in it, but tonight will be an exception

"Now you listen here! Just when this story is beginning to make sense you have to go in mid-air and mutter 'Kongou Kokuretsuzan' which most people will assume is Japanese for 'I'm going to fuck you up' for all they care. Now you go and tell me right now how a redneck like you get some Street Fighter moves"

"...nn..nnnope"

Ah'm sorry Granny Smith... I have ta do this

"... Alright fine! Die with your secret then!"

A quick shot to the head. Game over. And the winner of the World Warrior Tournament is Deadpool! Thank you, Thank you - you all shouldn't have aw really.. but still it sucks not to have some answers.

{{I can't stress enough how important you need to get out of here. Leave that thing already!}}

"Relax James Earl Jones, all we have to do is catch up to Appleshag and we're home free!"

{{NO! Don't you get you idiot! You let this Applejack get away minutes ago! Soon she'll be here with the rest of the Elements, you screwed up!}}

"Okay Okay! Sheesh, it's not the end of the world yet. Let me just grab my weapons upstairs and we'll think of something"

One short look back to his opponent. Whew, Horses are hard to kill! This one is lying on its side riddled with gunshot wounds all over, if he didn't shoot its brains out it'd probably stand up again. He entered the barn through the front door and saw the limp old pony corpse still resting on the rocking chair. It didn't seem like it struggled after the attack, like it just went and accepted it's fate.

{{They'll be here any minute now. Obviously you can't face them head-on - if they do reach us go straight for the woods, we'll be safer there}}

"I know, I know" walking up the stairs he entered through the hole made earlier and grabbed one of his sword on the edge of the room.

"Hey, you think that thing was made from a creamy pasta too?"

{{No. The energy around it is different from our friend earlier. But there is some... power... mildly present in it. To be quite honest I was expecting to see it further}}

Walking towards the other end of the room to grab his sword and knife, he took a glimpse at the hole on the floor made from the pounding he took earlier. Almost in full view is a pool of blood splattered all over the floor

"Power? I thought the only problem I have here is the Elements of Harmony?" picking up the other sword and knife, he sheathed the swords to his back and withdrew the knife back to his pocket. Deadpool then proceeded to the room where the other ponies jumped out from earlier and by instinct gazed at the horizon

"Whoever noticed me in this lack of light around has really good eyes. I can barely make out the tree house I saw earlier"

It's quiet around here. No birds, no crickets, no anything. It seems the only noise around here was the fight he had with Japanese redneck Neo a while ago. It's because for this very reason that he was able to hear a mob of hoof steps in the distance getting slightly louder.

{{They're here. Get out}}

"Running away time!" with that he ran back to the open room earlier and jumped down the hole to the barn. It was a large drop, but years of mildly imitating Spiderman has its perks. Quickly recovering, he sprinted to the opposite side of the barn and --

"Wait a minute" he quickly faced the spot, trying to make sense of things "What happened to--"







"Darlings, why on Equestria would you visit this late?"

Twilight and Pinkie was standing in front of Rarity at Carousel Boutique's door, immediately answering the commotion they were making that late. Luckily she wasn't asleep but working on her inspiration room all night.

"Rarity! no time to explain but--"

"RARITY!THERE'SAMONSTERONTHELOOSETHATKILLEDZECORAANDWENTAFTER--" Pinkie's panic was muffled by Twilight putting her hoof on the pink mare's mouth

"What we're trying to tell you is there's a monster on the loose and we are - wait, are you all alone here Rarity?"

"..W-Why yes Twilight, I let Sweetiebelle sleepover at Applejack's tonight - but Twilight, what is this talk about a monster?" Rarity was perplexed of all this. What could possibly be so important that Twilight and Pinkie Pie would come this late and warn her about?

Twilight continued with her hoof covering Pinkie's still muffling mouth "There's no time to explain Rarity, we have to warn the other girls - all of Ponyville is depending on us" she let go of Pinkie's mouth in which the mare became uncharacteristically silent

She grabbed rarity by her hoof pulling her from her house "B-but Twilight! Where are we going?" the white unicorn tried to calmly inquire of her, keeping up with their fast trot to wherever they are going

"To Applejack's! Fluttershy is already at the library and Rainbow Dash is too far off - we can't separate from each other, there's no telling how powerful this monster is"

"What of this monster, Twilight? What is so important that you both have to run over to the boutique and check up on me?"

"I do not know any more than you do. Pinkie Pie here told me that Fluttershy reached her first to tell what happened to Zecora and her animals"

"Pinkie Pie?" after passing through Sugarcube Corner, the white unicorn faced the pink earth pony leading the way with Twilight beside her "What happened to Zecora and the animals?"

Pinkie didn't respond - rather silent of her tonight. After a few moments Twilight took the liberty to answer her question "The monster killed them Rarity. They're gone"

"GONE?!" she in no way expected the night would turn out like this "But how?! Are you sure about this Twilight, Pinkie?"

Pinkie finally broke her silence "I didn't ask Fluttershy how it happened, as soon as she told me we ran straight to Twilight's. She fainted on the way"

"...Why on Equestria... Where is this monster now? Twilight?" Rarity was beginning to feel less composed at the moment, her voice breaking in tone "Pinkie? What does it look like?"

Ignoring Rarity's queries the mares finally reached the path to Sweet Apple Acres at the school where they saw a silhouette of two figures in the distance rushing to their direction. The girls slowed to a trot to inspect the shadowy figures closer

"It's Applejack and the crusaders!" the two other ponies glanced at Pinkie in confusion who suddenly continued to shout at the figures "Applejack! It's us!"

"Pinkie Pie?!" a loud but tired shout came from the figure in the distance - she was right, it was Applejack!

Finally they caught up with the farmer pony with Applebloom and Sweetiebelle on her back and Scootaloo on her scooter catching up just a short distance from the school. Applejack was breathing very heavily from the burden of running all the way from the farm while carrying the two ponies but she was strong enough to tell them what's happening

"Twilight! Some monster just killed Granny Smith and tried to kill all of us!"

"What?! But how could that.."

"It's true! We ran for our lives but Big Mac stayed behind and fought the monster himself!" Scootaloo took it upon herself to explain what happened "I saw it approach from the woods! It's probably on its way here!"

"Sweetiebelle, are you okay?!" Rarity rushed to her sister at Applejack's back "Your sprained your hoof! Oh dear, what happened to you girls?"

"We jumped out the window earlier to escape the monster" Everypony faced Applejack as she explain "Big Mac told us to run to Ponyville and warn all'a ya, Twilight we have ta get back there and save him!"

Twilight tried to make sense of everything - is it the same monster that attacked Fluttershy before or are there more than one monster attacking Ponyville? "Applejack, tell us what the monster looks like"

The farmer pony rushed her words "U-uh - It's tall, and uh standing on its hind legs - it has tiny claws and wearing something red and has skin like a zombie pony - look Twilight mah brother is there we have to save him!"

That description sounds familiar.. this better not be Sunset Shimmer's doing.

"Okay, Rarity take the fillies to the library while the rest of us warn Rainbow Dash"

It only took a moment for her to kindle "WHAT?!"

"Applejack we can't face the monster all by ourselves, we need--"

"NO! I ain't listenin' to yer fancy brainy talk - mah brother is there fightin' that thing and ah'm going back there to save him! Let's go Pinkie!" and with that she ran towards Sweet Apple Acres and almost immediately Pinkie Pie followed after

"WAIT! GIRLS!" Twilight faced Rarity, unsure of what to do

"You go on ahead Twilight, I’ll bring the girls to the library" The lavender alicorn nodded and followed after the two. "Girls, we have to go to the library now" the two fillies just nodded, too horrified to say anything this night while Scootaloo looked over to the ponies running to the farm

"Miss Rarity, where's Rainbow Dash?"



"Applejack! We don't know what this thing is capable of doing!"

"Of course! Exactly why I ain't leavin mah brother with it!"

"It's probably the same monster that killed Zecora and Fluttershy's animals!"

"What?!" the orange earth pony faced the alicorn behind her - not stopping her rush "A monster killed Zecora and Fluttershy's animals?!"

"Yes! It's why I think it would be best for all of us to stick together at this point!"

"Did you tell the princess already?"

"No"

"WHY DIDN'T YOU?!" the two earth ponies screamed at her in unison, making her doubt the wisdom behind her decision to not warn the princess

"I-I.. I don't know how terrible the situation is!"

"Zecora is DEAD and ya don't know how terrible the situation is?!" the girls are still frowning at her while pinkie retorts with Applejack "YEAH!"

"I'm sorry! I was hoping the situation wouldn't be this big and would be isolated at the Everfree Forest!"

They can finally see the farm despite the time of the night, they hurried to the entrance not stopping for anything. The distance between Fluttershy's cottage and Sweet Apple Acres is exremely far, if this is the same monster how could it travel between the places so fast?

"Applejack, can the monster fly?"

"What the hay are ya talkin' about Twilight? Why would ya--"


"竜巻!"
There was an explosion from the farm that caught everypony's attention. A large purple flame rocketed from the barn to the other side of the woods across the entrance of the farm.

"-What in the... What in tarnation is THAT?"






That's it. He quits. This universe can destroy itself for all he cares. Fuck all this - he's pretty content with destroying his own adjacent universes. At least he never got spinning kicked through several trees in those universes or has to worry about demon ninja ponies spawned from conveniently named food... hey wait a minute is that Akuma's theme song from MvC3 playing in the background?





It's still happening by the way - he's being spinning kicked through several trees - by a horse - that he killed earlier - while on fire - after ridiculously shouting in Japanese - while on EVIL-PURPLE fire. Go on, try to picture that in your mind for a minute. Shit, if this isn't lazy writing he doesn't know what is.

"豪昇龍拳!!" in mid strike Big Mac charged his right hoof and strikes the monster straight up its chest sending it upwards to the sky. The Goshoryuken, the move he made when he had his cutie mark by splitting several apples in half because of the force of his hoof.

"I believe I can flyyyyyyyyy♫-oof!" launching from an approximate 60° angle from the Redneck Ninja Pony™  he lands on a different part of the forest far away from the farm. Not that he can tell anyway, the trees around him are practically apple tree clones. "Hey listen wherever you are, we can talk this over - I’ll split this universe with you! we'll share it!" 

He darts his head to every direction, hoping to get a glimpse of the Redneck Ninja Pony™ "Look, we'll be an unstoppable team! Deadpool Kills the Technicolor Rainbow Horses team-up with the Teenage Redneck Ninja Pony™! note the frequent use of the trademark symbol there - I call dibs on the idea!" 

Atop the Apple forest, a bright light shone in the night sky

"Daniel Way and Cullen Bunn will SHIT their pants on this one, we'll even get Rob Liefield for the art!--no wait, people don't like him... look uh, we'll turn it into a pixar movie - we can have Nolan North to do the VO for me and uh.. Eddie Murphy for yours! Michael Bay can take care of the rights!"

"滅殺豪波動!!" The bright light glowed into a fiery purple, raining down a beam from its place in the sky towards the assassin below. The Messatsu Gou Hadou. A powerful surge of energy focused through a pony's hooves by using one's ki powered by the Satsui no Hado, both were taught to him by Master Fuji from the land far from the east past Griffon. Master Fuji sought for the incarnation of Akuma - the supreme master of the hoof and claimed that he found him in Ponyville and  that Big Mac.. was him.

"I'd sing a song right now by Bruce Springsteen, but copyright infringement is annoying. So I’ll just go and say I'M ON FIRE! AAAAHHH!!" Deadpool rolled on the ground while screaming when the fire beam faded out from the sky, trying to douse the purple flames on him. "HUWA!HUWA!HUWAHUWAHUWA!!WAAAAAH!!!" He feels like the freakout kid from that YouTube video who shoved a remote up his ass. Still busy being on fire, he failed to notice the burning Teenage Redneck Ninja Pony™ land near his spot from the sky. 

He just eyed the pathetic creature roll itself on the ground while screaming like some special needs colt. Pathetic. To think something like this killed Granny Smith... did he fail on protecting his family? He thought the past was over - why did this had to happen? Now he's losing control of himself again, he can feel the power of The Surge of Murderous Intent controlling him "Yer too weak to handle mah full power"

Oh no he DID-<cock head sideways>-IN'T! after finally dousing himself from the fires of the laser beam from God, still lying on the ground he finally faced up to the horse. The horse seem to be burning, but its body is not... cooking - like it's on fire only for dramatic effect, or it's on fire but the animator is lazy. There's a real frightening vibe around it, but totally different from the Demon Pinkie Pie earlier - this one feels like he's going to be beat down to a pulp. To complete the look the eyes seem to be glowing red, but in an evil-I’m-gonna-kill-you way instead of evil-I’m-gonna-eat-your-soul way... not sure which one he's supposed to be more terrified of now.

"Stand up and redeem yer honor by fightin' me"

Whoa! That thing's voice even sounds more evil! He'd give it a few pats on the back for out-evilling his own scary evil consciousness "Sure. Hold on, let me stand up and fight fair and--FIRE!!" he pulled out his gun from his left holster while in the missionary position minus a girl and fired at--haha! fired... get it? because the horse is on fire and he said.. ah...

The creature tried to use a black box on him again - he expected this and by using the ki of the Satsui no Hado he zipped to his side circling the assassin with tremendous speed, no magic can do the things he can as far as he knows. Zooming through the trees in wild directions now, he kicked away the imploding black boxes on the now-standing creature and bucked him through a tree.

Pathetic. This creature is Pathetic. If it didn't kill Granny Smith he would've stopped wasting his time with it long ago.

Deadpool is beginning to lose consciousness - why he has a healing factor but apparently still can feel physical pain is beyond him. He's barely standing with his back resting on the tree that got chipped. This thing spinning kicked him through several trees just a while ago, why is it holding back now? coughing up some chunks of his own blood he tried to reason with it again

"..h-hey, you thinking over the proposal? I mean, I’ll do it you know.. for the record I’m sorry I killed that granny a while ago.. no hard feelings right?"

"I.."

Deadpool cocked his head forward, waiting for an answer from the Redneck Ninja Pony™. Even when he can't feel his entire body he's sure he just dropped a package from his glory hole "...w-we'll share the profits 25/75... 75 for me naturally"

".. I am Akuma... and I will show you the meaning of pain"

That family-friendly redneck voice is seemingly absent from its voice as it pound its hooves to the ground. The flames on the horse intensified as it glide straight to our hero, his body refusing to move Deadpool accepted whatever the demon will do to him



Atop the Apple forest, a bright light shone in the night sky.
But that light was might as well be gone
Not feeling his body, it’s akin to being trapped inside a rag doll - totally powerless to move your own joints.

The purple flame covered him
Then the darkness
Though his body can't feel pain anymore, he almost sense that they're being torn apart
He can hear himself almost fading... incinerating from existence
There was no light to see it all happening - he was blind

Then he heard the sound of something tumbling on the ground, dangerously close to his ears
...It was his head..
Scrambling his eyes he begged for light to enter this place
... And it finally did








A large open space was present where the trees around them used to be. The trees around him has been torn down, every single trunk fell to directions opposite of them - even from his vantage point he can tell that he's in a perfect circle right now. His blood littered the trunks everywhere, the tattered remains of his costume sprayed on every side of the onslaught, his weapons out of sight except for one blade lying on the center the light reflecting from it piercing his eyes almost directly below his assailant.

He was just a head now. God damn it, he's only a head now. I guess you can say this is poetic justice for the stunts he pulled earlier. The horse was standing in the center his back turned to him, he thinks it's wise to play dead.


The Shun Goku Satsu. Instant Hell Murder. Big Macintosh only used this technique once, and Granny Smith made him promise to never tap in this power again. It's a dangerously powerful move that pierces through the enemy's soul - but one must fully embrace the principle of Satsui No Hadou the 'Surge of Murderous Intent' in order to learn it alone. He has not used this power for a long time, with good reason.

"The Raging Demon... Its power is unequal... It is not my hooves, but your past sins that will kill you... The more evil your past doings, the more painful your death..."

He's not going to die, haha, he has a healing factor... right?... he's not going to die now, right?

The burning red horse turned to face his decapitated head... does it know he's still alive?

"Each victory is a missed opportunity to die..."


"Big Macintosh! Big Macintosh!" the raging horse faced to the direction of the screams, there were three voices shouting in a direction from the woods. Its subtle but the flames on the red horse seems to be dying out very slowly.

"... Applejack.." slowly the flames igniting on the horse is fading out as the voices seemed louder but still distant. He recognizes the voices from anywhere - Applejack and her friends Pinkie Pie and Twilight. She came back for him.


"BIG MACINTOSH!" the three ponies followed the path of broken trees as they scream for Applejack's dear brother. 

"I have never seen magic like this! A large purple flame bring down so many trees physically but not burning them? I'm sure this isn't scientifically--"

"Quit yer yap fer later Twilight when we found mah brother! BIG MAC! WHERE ARE YA?!"

Pinkie was hopping around the path, hoping she would get a glimpse of him too "Oh Big Mac! Big Maaaaac!!"

"BIG MAC!"


This is it. It's his time now. Though it is very early for him to go, he knows he can't live like this forever. There is one thing that will out-strengthen his desire to fight and continue fighting to be the best. It's love. When Master Fuji urged him to stay and train, It's his love for his family that drew him back to Equestria. He can't leave his family and friends behind for the opportunity to continue Akuma's legacy.

He's not Akuma. He's Big Macintosh.

It is extremely difficult to resist the power of Satsui No Hadou once anypony has embraced it - impossible according to Master Fuji, but he has done it before - and today will be no different. Once you have repelled your ki from the power, you will be extremely weak compared to the strength you once had and past injuries will return to your body, weakening you further.

Past injuries.


"IT'S A DEAD END!" the straight path of broken trees stopped at one end completely devoid of Big Mac and the monster "FIDDLESTICKS! Where the hay are they?!"

"BIG MAC!"


Goodbye Applejack, he'll be joining Granny Smith now. Though you might never know everything that had happened, I at least have saved everypony from this monster.
My death... is pointless... but not without honor. Take care of Applebloom. Sorry. Goodbye


The purple fire on the horse completely extinguished, it's eyes stopped glowing red and immediately it fell to its side. Almost immediately it looked like it did when Deadpool killed it, riddled with bullet holes everywhere but less blood is pouring out now.

... It's dead... what..?

"... so... good job for me, I guess?"

{{No}}

Deadpool's vision is beginning to dim.. being decapitated is taking its toll now as he quickly lose his grip on his thoughts

"..holy...shit... am.. am I really... dying?"

{{Sort of..}}

Sort of? He's been decapitated a lot of times before. It's true that you get to stay conscious for a while assuming you got lucky or got used to the shock. You'll faint eventually, but it feels more like going to sleep instead of... losing your grip on your mind like he's feeling now..

[[Haha! That was a FUN fight! That was sooo cool!!]]

He can hear her voice but can't understand what she said and where it's coming from. He can't see her but it's maybe on account of losing his vision

[[You should've seen yourselves back there! Big Mac was like - wooshwooshwooshwoosh! while he was spinning kicking you destroying the trees and you were like - bangbangbangbangbang! - and he was like - wataaa! kick your black box while I scream in a different language! - and you were like - ow ow ow! let's make a movie! hahahaha!!]]

She's giggling. Fuck. He's dying out here and someone's laughing about it?... wait, never mind.

[[hahaha! oh sweet Celestia that was amazing!... oh and you're about to die too, but you should've seen yourself, that was ammaaziing!!]]

Can't...fucking...understand...anything...

[[Oh dear, I think she heard me.... Oh well! let's get you outta here in a jiffy!]]

Mind.. getting.. blank... hate... creamy.. pastas..

"Over here girls! I heard something here! Hurry!"

"Pinkie hold on! Wait for us!"

[[Let's go Casanova!]]



"COME ON! QUICK!"

Pinkie Pie was hopping very fast for Twilight and Applejack to follow. She claimed she heard some noise somewhere far off, but they didn't hear a thing since the purple flame.

"QUICK! We don't have much time!"

Whatever Pinkie heard it sure is a long way off, there is no way she could have heard something so far away

"HURRY! Time isn't on our side!"

"Darn it Pinkie, we git what yer sayin' already! just lead the way!"

"Sorry!"

After a long period of hopping she finally stopped at one point where light seem to reflect from it. Twilight and Applejack was a short distance off before they finally caught up with her. Gasping for air and immediately regretting it because of the foul smell within, they both entered the dimly lighted spot Pinkie did before them.

".. oh... sweet Celestia..." Twilight's was the first voice to enter the scene

Little patches of fire surrounded the ground littered with blood, red cloth, and wood debris that could only be from the tumbled trees surrounding the perimeter all over. It was a bloody mess, red streaks splattered all around the trees at the scene, there were flesh hanging from some branches and a sword placed parallel to the body of Big Macintosh lying on the ground riddled with small wounds all over his body

"..oh.. Big Macintosh!" Applejack finally ran and wrapped her hooves around his body, her tears flowing down heavily from her face. She wailed there on the spot, her gaze darting to every direction on Big Macintosh's body. She should have stayed with Big Mac, maybe this wouldn't have happened.

"Oh Big Mac! I'M SORRY! Ah shouldn't have left ya in the farm!" she buried her head to her hooves and mourned for him, knowing there's nothing she can do

Twilight and Pinkie just stood there watching Applejack. They all lost Zecora, Fluttershy lost her animals, and now Applejack lost Granny Smith and Big Mac. Why was this monster targeting their loved ones? And how could it have killed so many in so little time? Is this even the same monster?

"Something is not right around here. The splattered blood all over this place doesn't seem to be from Big Macintosh. Where were all these red cloth came from?"

Everypony looked again at their surroundings, with Applejack still sobbing.

"Big Mac's body is intact. The litter here came from somepony else..." Twilight faced Pinkie Pie "Pinkie, what did you hear over here anyway?"

"I thought I heard somepony laughing here. I was sure."

"You're sure?"

"Yes, Twilight! I really did!"

...How... how could she hear somepony laughing here when she and Applejack didn't hear a thing?

Facing back the carnage "From the looks of it, it seems like... something exploded here. Maybe it was the monster earlier, we don't know."

"Twilight..." the two ponies granted their attention back to the yellow earth pony, her lighter mane and hooves stained with little streaks of blood from her brother's body "I reckon it's time to tell the princess now?"

"... It's time."
> Chapter 5: 666
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------






Chapter 5: 666



"Wade, my darling?"

There is literally nothing where Deadpool is right now. No winds, no ground, no sound, no nothing but darkness all over the place - he can't even fathom if he's floating or standing since he can't feel a thing.

"Hello again, my love..."

Ah that sweet tender caring voice... he can recognize that from anywhere, he'd kill just to hear that voice anytime... which is... well, right now

"Death, baby girl!... I can hear you, but ah... I can't see you babe.." he tried to look around the place, but either he can't move or he just can't feel the motions

"I'm sorry Wade.. as much my omnipotence can grant me there are still... other powers that resist my influence.." her soft tender voice sounded a bit...  stern or something...

"... Yeah, sorry babe... but one day we'll be together - I just know it! I mean, my healing factor has GOT to die down sooner or later right?... granted that that may take probably 500 years or so, but still"

"That's not what I mean, darling..." her soft voice trailed to a desperate tone.. like she's worried about something "Listen Wade, I can only reach you for a moment, there are powers in you and around you that resists my presence"

"... What... do you mean?" this is beginning to sound bad "Death - baby! Would you mind, like, showing your cute bony cheeks to me? It's really is a bummer talking to you like this, I feel weird really"

"I can't Wade... an immense power is preventing my influence not only to your world but worlds around it" there was a more aggressive tone from her voice, but somehow is still soft and nervous.. "This power is growing Wade, and I am losing control of those universes"

"Whoa whoa whoa... are you serious babe?"

"Wade..." oddly, her voice seem to be getting softer - to the point of being barely audible "I cannot claim the souls. I can hear their cries for release from this... entity, but I cannot reach to them. It is only a matter of time before it claims you too. I need your help..."

"...What?... claims me? What's going on?" 

"You must find a way to destroy this power my love" her voice is beginning to fade even further "If you don't, not only will we never be together, but soon this power will span across..." her voice trailed off into nothing, her voice no longer present only echoed shortly after her words

"Babe? Babe! What am I supposed to destroy?! DEATH!"

"DEATH!!"

[[Whoa there! Nice to see you finally awake, sleepy pants!]]

Creamy pasta Pinkie greeted him as he sit up from the floor of her... hell dimension or something, it seems like he fully regenerated again. He's so glad he can feel his body again as he look at his hands and check Wade Jr. all intact

"Oh shit.. for a second there I thought I almost died..."

{{Us too. I lost you for a moment}}

Oh the evil voice! He almost forgot about him

"Lost me for a moment huh... well isn't that convenient..."

Suddenly Deadpool feels less gullible today...

"So uh.. how long was I out?" Deadpool turned to Pinkie the friendly nightmare as he stands up feeling a slight cold wind airing his balls

[[Exactly 66 hours and 6 minutes! cool huh?]]

"What the fuck - I regenerated for that long?!"

[[Not really. Your body... 'regenerated' just fine. It's your mind that totally blanked out, our friend in your noggin was the only one I could talk to for the last hours or so. He's not as funny as you though, but still]]

"Wai-Wai-Wait. If I’m out, wouldn't HE be out too? I mean, he's in my mind - right?"

{{It's a lot more complicated than that}}

[[Indeed it is!]]

He'd ask them how 'complicated' that is exactly but this time he'll just not think about that. Suspension of disbelief is critical to keeping whatever is left of your sanity when you're crazy as fuck

[[So! Ready to continue destroying this universe?]]

"ABSOLUTELY FUCKING NOT! FUCK YOU, and FUCK your FUCKING universe! I ain't doing this shit anymore - thanks for the opportunity, but I prefer to destroy a universe that ISN'T FUCKING broken yet!"

He just had the strangest conversation ever and she had to bring this up, that is just rude "And don't think I’ve forgotten that I just fought this universe's version of Neo, either!"

[[Don't be such a meanie! I mean, you won!... sorta]]

"SORTA? - I 'SORTA' FUCKING magically got DEAD back there! - which would be REALLY FUCKING convenient in any other circumstance!"

{{Pinkie Pie, What was that all about? The energy I felt from that horse was very different}}

[[I don't know! I'm just as surprised as you guys are! It doesn't even feel like magic, I’ve never felt power like that too]]

Well, the little demon does look genuinely surprised. But this is a demon! right? He guesses he should expect his back to be stabbed eventually, but admittedly that won't make sense... wouldn't it?

"I'm FUCKING done with this shit. Look at me, I’m fucking naked here. I keep spare costumes on my FUCKING pockets and obviously I don't FUCKING have them on me. Contrary to popular belief, my FUCKING costume doesn't FUCKING regenerate itself you know!"

[[You have a dirty-icky mouth mister. Why do you always say that word?]] the demon pony was giving him that face mothers do before they ground their kid to their room

"Say.. what FUCKING word?" he raised his left eyebrow at her - that is, if you still count eyebrows that don't really have.. well, brows

[[That word!]]

"You mean - FFFUCK?" he threateningly approach the bloody pony, too pissed off to be creeped out by her 

[[Yeah]] she just kept her face straight. Okay, Deadpool will be the first to admit he'll lose to a staring contest with her

"B-Because-FUCK YOU that's why!" He pointed his finger at her menacingly. He is so terrifying "and I don't give a FUCK! and also - the answer to your first FUCKING question is FUCK YOU!" he turned his back against her and raised his hands to the air "FUCK!"

[[You need to calm down, mister. After all it's not like you failed or anything... I’m sure nothing like before will happen again! You have much much more work to catch up on!]]

You know, when you listen to that demon horse without looking at her she kinda sound cute and cuddly - as long as you ignore the demonic undertone.

"Listen, do you want to know how I was able to kill so many.. "literary" people? It's because they're pretty static when it comes to identity. I already know and anticipate how fast Spiderman is, and I know how to confuse his spider sense. You see, it's pretty easy once you figure out the strategy - and I never had to worry about Spiderman launching a hadouken at me because I know it doesn't happen like that!.... THIS place HOWEVER.... well fuck"

He turned back to face the red pony just standing there with a smile plastered on its face "... you didn't understand a word I said did you?"

[[Oh? Uh.. sure! HEY! Do you want to watch something fun?]]

".... Yeah, sure. What is it?"

Pinkie Pie pulled out a crystal ball out of... her ass? Or what? Deadpool doesn't understand, it kind of looked like it just materialized from her rear and she just grabbed and placed it in front of them complete with a 'WIIIP!' cartoon sound effect

"Did you pulled that out of your ass?"

[[What? Sorry, I don't really understand most of your words]]

"Never mind, is that it? is that what you were going to show me?"

[[No, I haven't shown you anything yet!]]

She waved her hooves around the crystal ball as some black smoke move within, even complemented with a cartoon 'WOOSH' sound effect [[Now BEHOLD! Watch the crystal ball as it reveal all! Be in awe at the image you...saw... something something rhyme with ball - WOOOO!!!]]

He leaned forward to the ball as an image of a large crowd of ponies gather around three newly dug graves with three coffins on their side somewhere outside of town which he assume must be Ponyville. A brownish pony was giving a sort of speech to the crowd as they huddle together, some are crying and everyone is evidently gloomy. This kind of picture would be complete if it's raining but too bad it's particularly sunny

[[They're holding a funeral service right now for the everypony you killed earlier. It took them a while to find Zecora in the forest, and the animals you killed earlier are already buried near Fluttershy's Cottage. Fluttershy is staying at Rarity's place while Applejack and Applebloom are staying with Twilight's]]

"I guess you wouldn't want to stay in the place where your family and friends just got murdered for a while"

[[Yup! I think Fluttershy is going to have her cottage demolished soon, I don't know about Sweet Apple Acres though]]

"Hey, this is a really large crowd.. hey! check out those two big ponies - awesome hairstyle" his finger pointed at two regal looking ponies one white and the other in a dark shade of lavender with technicolor hair swaying action

[[Those are the princesses. You see, the elements are a huge ally to Equestria and one of them is practically a newly made princess now. Combine that with the fact that their family and friends all got killed by a mysterious zombie looking monster that vanished without sight, then you got the most popular funeral in all of Equestria!]]

There wasn't enough time for funerals to take place when he started this 'redeeming' business. Usually because that so many important figures are already dead that everyone just practically panicked overnight. There's some sense of success you feel when you see something like this happen just because you killed a bunch of horses... it feels great... it's a different kind of great when you see people committing suicide or looting everywhere - chaos is awesome, but this? This is nice too

[[But enough of that now, this is the perfect opportunity to strike!]] the image in the crystal ball vanished into a trail of black smoke inside, making our hero raise his brow-less eyebrow at the pony

"What?! Why would I strike now when everyone is practically there? I mean - yeah, I could use some good old-fashioned carnage but aren't all the Elements there? Wouldn't I be... I don't know - dead for sure now?!"

[[I don't mean THERE silly! And no, not everyone is particularly there]]

The smoke in crystal ball gathered again to form another image, this time of a cute little pink pony hopping around in a forest looking for something. If the crystal ball came with sound he's sure this would be accompanied with cute little music

[[She just won't go away! Ever since the fight she just won't leave the spot, like oh my gosh she's so annoying!]]

"What-this cute little thing? How can she be so annoying?... ... I’m going to kill her aren't I?"

[[Yes! Fun Fact: That's my unchanged self, one of the elements!]]

"Holy shit, that used to be you?" Deadpool took a closer look at the equine "Holy crap, I honestly don't believe you. This one looks a whole lot more cuddly than you" he gazed a little longer until he caught a glimpse evil Pinkie Pie's annoyed face with an eyebrow raised at him ".. What?"

[[Nothing]] He felt like she rolled her non-existent eyes at him [[I only appear to somepony if I want to be seen by them, it's one of the things I can do. There are exceptions of course, but that mare over there can detect my presence a mile away! I don't want to risk being seen by her so I can't grab your things let along your weapons]]

"Whoa... but, why don't you want to be seen by her? can't you kill her yourself or.. something?"

[[Believe me. I tried. In another universe of course. It's just not that easy. I don't know what she's capable of to be honest, like I don't know what I am capable of too]]

"Shit. of all the elements, I didn't imagine the Element of Laughter would be the most unpredictable. I figured all you'd do is make jokes and a ton of pop-culture references"

[[Not exactly wrong, but it's not the Element that's unpredictable - it's the pony wielding it. You see, my 'person' was made as a kind of character that--]]

"No, shut up. I don't want to hear an explanation" he waved both his hands at her, having enough of this shit

[[..Y-You sure? I mean, it might be important to--]]

"No, shut up. I don't want to know about it"

[[But--]]

"Shut up! Just tell me what to do next"

[[Okay! I'm going to bring you two miles away from her and then you grab your--]]

"No. Not doing that either"

[[WHAT?!]]
{{WHAT!?}} the two voices almost responded in unison, of which Deadpool just shrugged his shoulders

"WHAT?"

[[...WHAT?]]

"What?"

{{Okay stop! What do you mean you're not doing it?}}

Deadpool faced to his right as if talking to the evil caption box itself somewhere "You heard her a while ago, she doesn't know what that pony is capable of. I'm not taking any chances to fight another creamy pasta okay? One Hyper Combo Finish is one too many, kapice?"

[[But she's alone! We can end this right now! And she's far away from everypony!]]

"Well, BOOHOO kid. We've done things your way, now we're doing it MY way. Fuck your stealth, it's time for some good old-fashioned Deadpool slaughter" he stood up and did a standing victory pose, his hands on his waist, his head high and his balls moistening, a devilish grin crept on his face as a familiar smoky figure materialize in the air looking menacingly at him with her arms crossed

[[Oh yeah? Maybe you forgot but you're naked and defenseless. How about that? huh?]]

"EASY.. can you bring me to that hut earlier?"







"It is with great sadness that I stand before you all today as we begin this ceremony... It.. has been of great difficulty to all of Ponyville as we mourn the loss of three of our good friends and residents. Three days ago our friends Zecora, Granny Smith and Big Macintosh have all been murdered by a mysterious creature... almost no trace of the monster is found to this day. We-we've all had a hard time accepting these turn of events where we feel like it was still only yesterday where we've shared our laughs and time with these ponies, and how we now wished we valued their company even more so before this... catastrophe happened to our peers"

The Mayor was giving out a written speech for this event, acting like she knew Zecora and Applejack's family. Rainbow Dash knows now is not the time to think of things like that, but she still can't stop thinking about how the Mayor is probably doing this to look good in everypony's eyes.

Look at her. Faking a stammer between her sentences, what a joke. Bet that if this were just a normal funeral the Mayor wouldn't even send her condolences, let alone a speech. This is a huge crowd for a funeral, the entire Apple family is here - the ENTIRE Apple family and they only account maybe a third of the crowd, all of Ponyville is here too since nopony actually die here often and this is practically the first murder in generations, even princesses are even here too with a few guards.

She still can't believe so many things happened in such a short time - while she's asleep even! If only she was awake that time, maybe they could have stopped the monster. Rainbow was standing next to Applejack while Fluttershy was crying next to Rarity all facing the open graves while the Mayor delivers her speech. Twilight was way out back in the crowd next to Princess Celestia. This really is a big crowd...

"Rainbow Dash, where's Pinkie Pie?"

Applejack lost it for days. Rainbow Dash had to tell her family from Appleloosa and someplace else the bad news herself. They weren't sure if they were going to continue running the farm, some of their family will gladly help them if they will since they're not really sure what else to do.

"She won't go. She said she won't leave the place until the monster comes back, y'know?"

For some reason, Pinkie Pie just won't leave that part of the forest. She said the monster is bound to come back to that spot and she's not leaving without seeing it. Applejack and Twilight said that she heard the monster the night Big Mac was killed and all they saw was a lot of blood and gore around the place. Nopony dared to clean the place, and nopony could get Pinkie out of the forest so Rainbow Dash just brought her food from Sugar cube corner every now and then.

"She can't miss the funeral you need to go get her now Dash"

"She said she wouldn't come! You know how it is with Pinkie"

"Sugarcube. Just please get her now, please?"

Applejack lost a lot today, that said she's doing a really good job talking to her calmly like this "Tch.. Alright, I’m going..."   for some reason the Mayor decided the funeral should be somewhere near the Hospital and the Train Station, it's going to be Ponyville's Cemetery from now on.

... Why did this all had to happen?... Could somepony have done something?


Rainbow Dash flew overhead past the crowd on her way south, must be her impatience working on herself again - the least she could do was sit through the entire funeral

"Is that Rainbow Dash that just flew past earlier?"

Her voice was very caring and soft, like a very loving mother to her precious filly. Twilight always looked up to her but for different reasons in time. 

"... She probably went to get Pinkie, Princess" She first aspired to be the best student she could be to her mentor, always willing to learn new things magic or not, but rarely of those things is the wisdom she feels she need to nurture within herself. Every time she learns a new lesson about friendship she has to send her 'report' to the princess, informing her of her new found lesson... Is that why Princess Celestia gave her that task? To eventually prepare her for... this?

"Twilight. Why haven't you told me of the situation earlier?"

Twilight forced herself to face the Princess. Her voice wasn't stern or condescending, but hearing the Princess ask that made her feel all the more that what happened is her own fault

"I'm sorry princess, I didn't know the extent of the situation. I thought we could have handled it."

"I understand, Twilight. You mentioned earlier about Sunset Shimmer?"

"Yes. Is the portal open during that time? is there a way to tell if Sunset Shimmer has a hand in all this, your majesty?"

"None that I know of. Luna assured me that the portal was closed at that time, it just opened last night though but when Luna visited she told me that everything was fine. Sunset Shimmer actually asked to come visit you but Luna thought it would be better if she just sent her condolences"

"So she has nothing to do with the monster then..." there it is, the last possible explanation she could think of - down the drain.

"Why would you think Sunset Shimmer would have something to do with this, my prized pupil?" the princess leaned towards her and kept her voice low, loud enough for only both of them to hear

"I was only able to get a description of what the monster looked like yesterday when Fluttershy finally came to. From what she said it seemed oddly familiar to the form I took when I entered the other world recently. I was hoping it would have a connection but sadly it does not, and we are all in the dark again"

The princess was obviously surprised at that remark. Only Twilight on all of Equestria has the slightest knowledge of the world beyond the portal - not counting Sunset Shimmer of course

"Actually princess... I may need some more help on this one"







"Pinkie Pie! Come on, we need you at the funeral!"

Rainbow Dash was hovering a good distance from Pinkie Pie below the open space at the forest, only Pinkie Pie can stand the awful smell of rotting flesh that surround all around it 

"I don't even know how you can keep hanging around with this smell... I mean, I know you have your thing and all but come on!"

"Rainbow Dash, I'm so glad to see you! But I already told you I can't leave this spot! I just know the monster will come back here to get its things back! and I’m not leaving before I catch it!"

"Things? but there's nothing here Pinkie besides all these... monster innards! Pinkie, the monster probably exploded or something let's just go to the funeral and stop guarding this awful place already!"

"No! The monster couldn't have exploded because I heard it laugh! And there ARE things here, look!" Pinkie Pie grabbed something from... wherever she keeps her things and held out a rusted long saddle-looking... thing

"See this? I've found it not too far from this spot! Nopony wears a saddle bag like this! I've checked inside and you won't believe what's in them!"

"Eww! Pinkie?! You actually touched that with blood still on it?! Are you crazy?!.. wait, of course you are! Pinkie what were you thinking?!"

"I just knew I had to keep it because I’m sure it's from the monster! From how Fluttershy explained what it looked like the monster was definitely carrying something like this! And look what I’ve found inside!"

Pinkie placed the long saddle bag and opened one of the bags and pulled out a large suit too long for a pony to wear

"It's Red! Fluttershy said the monster was wearing red, and check this out-" she dropped the suit to the side and pulled out a smaller red cloth from another saddle "It's a red mask! just like what Fluttershy said the monster was wearing!"

"... Pinkie! why didn't you tell us this before?!"

"I just found them! You have to tell Twilight about this!"

"... Wait, ME? Pinkie! We're BOTH going to Twilight now!"

"NO! I can't leave this spot! Rainbow, the monster might come!"

"Pinkie, just go with me, please! You need to tell Twilight about what you found and you need to be there for your friends. Just grab the saddles and the stuff and let's go!"

"...But.. but I can't go! There might be some other stuff here that the monster might get!"

"...Pinkie...."

Dashie's eyes were pleading. Everypony has been sad around her and she thought if she shed more light on the situation everypony will be slightly happier. Now she has something to shed some light but what if there's more?

"Pinkie, everypony needs you now. Let's go already"

"... Alright Dashie, let's go.."

Okay you monster. I have my eye on you. You won't get away with this.

Pinkie Pie finally for the first time in days ran outside Big Mac's murder scene. Rainbow hovered low but not too low to avoid Pinkie's bad smell as they rush away from Sweet Apple Acres back to Ponyville.

"Geez. I never noticed how bad the barn looked before" Pinkie Pie never saw the damage of the barn in broad daylight since she never went out of the forest when she, Twilight and Applejack stumbled onto it. 

"Yeah, it looks bad isn't it? Applejack's gonna need a whole lot of help rebuilding the barn" Blood was still present on the door and barn door was wide open to reveal a dry pool of blood partly illuminated by the sunlight, nopony dared to clean the place yet either.

Poor Zecora... Poor Applejack... poor Applebloom... poor Fluttershy... poor everypony... I promise we'll get the monster one way or another. I Pinkie Promise you all.



[[Finally she left!]]







"I bet if I mix this red bottle with this blue bottle I’ll get an explosion! haha! I’m so smart"

Deadpool poured the bottles on a cauldron and lo and behold and explosive chemical reaction happened complete with a mini mushroom cloud. Deadpool is such an awesome alchemist

"Haha! genius! just genius! all I’ll have to do now is master that evil laugh and I’m good to go. HUEHUEHUEHUE!"

Who would have thought a Zebra voodoo could have so many dangerous chemicals? Deadpool apparently!

"Haha! Oh shit.. I feel like my subconscious is praising me too much again, but well justified it is!"

[[I have good news!]] behind our hero the all too familiar Pinkie the creamy pasta makes her smoking entrance [[The other me finally left the place! and I ha-]]

"-Yeah that's great, awesome, AND I have even BETTER NEWS!" Deadpool turned around to face Pinkie Pie holding a large bottle with a crudely drawn label 'GRENADE' and started with his retard dwarf voice "Deadpool. Makes. Enchaaantments!"

{{It's called Potion}}

"What? NO, it's not poisonous - it explodes!"

[[Wow. So you made a potion from Zecora's stuff huh?]]

"It's not poisonous. And I made some other things by the way check it out"

[[Wow!.. wait, what are those?]]

"Well... THIS one is called--... you know what never mind, I’ll just surprise you later. Now, I need to do a test run of all these stuffs and I am itching to kill a lot of things today, you got a location in mind? hint hint"

[[You mean the funeral? I thought you said--]]

"Of course I didn't mean the funeral! ...dumbass... Maybe another place tight-packed with a lot of ponies to kill? Y'know, like a city or...?"

[[Hmm... I know an ideal place for that! Especially since the princesses are away... plus I even think there'll be a 'BOSS level' for your little test run!]]

"Awesome. I'm giggling with delight over here let's go! come on where are you taking me?" Deadpool strapped on a makeshift belt where several large bottles labeled 'GRENADE' hanged from all over his waist. He also wore two straps diagonally worn on his chest to carry a large weapon on his back while he carries a long object around his hands

[[You sure you're not going to explain to me what those are at least?]]

"I already told you I’ll surprise you later! Not knowing its names are part of that surprise!"

[[Okie dokie lokie!]]

Deadpool's vision was suddenly surrounded by darkness, as he... ah, you get the drill, you know what happens when the devil teleports him.

"We-he-hell! This place is perfect!"

Several ponies in the street all fixed their attention to the naked mercenary. All those straps he made and he didn't bother to make a makeshift underwear you ask? Well try having your balls dangling in the wind for hours and tell me that doesn't feel good. Not sure if the ponies are looking in horror at either his gear or his junk but either way his testosterone is feeling really high.

"Everybody say-HEEEEEY!"
> Chapter 6: Knee-Deep in their Dead
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------






Chapter 6: Knee-Deep in their Dead



"Your tea and condiments, my good sir and lady"

The waiter gallantly served the sophisticated stallion and mare their tea and desserts at their table generously located near the edge of the cafe. Head up high, the servant trot with poise to the next table whose occupants admired with gleeful delight the presence of the most important pony in the world.

The white stallion sent his compliments to the cafe "Magnificent service, as always" using his magic, he lifted the tea cup as he begins to bask in the soft gorgeous scent of jasmine blossoms. Taking a sip to savor the soothing and divine taste of the heavenly drink, he placed the tea cup back to its mat and felt his soul expand

"Ah, the Numi Money King Jasmine Tea. Never had I spent 70 bits and felt more serene. The tea is simply lovely, there's no other word to describe it!"

"Only the best for the most important pony in the world, Fancy" the shapely blush-pink mare flattered the stallion as she gracefully sip hers "And yes, I most enjoy this selection. It does wonders to keep my figure"

"By the way dear Fleur, how was your photo shoot with that peculiar mare.. Photo Finish, was it?"

"Tolerable. But some of her designs do not fully complement my graceful figure" she did a pose as if a camera pony was nearby, eager to have her good side captured... which is of course every side of her figure

"Complement your graceful figure, you say?" Fancy Pants took another sip of his wonderful tea, ignoring the other ponies around them mimicking his poise "She once worked with a successful model once, got everyone hooked to her design - and the model herself"

"You mean Fluttershy?" Fleur tried to hide her disdain from just mentioning the name of the dreaded mare that momentarily took the spotlight from her once "I still don't see how that mare can possibly outshine me, surely there's no grace and figure that can possibly outshine mine" she rested her head to her hooves as she gave a seductive gaze at nothing, generously giving everypony a good view of her beauty

"I'd rather not converse about her like that if I were you. You do know she was nearly murdered days ago"

"What?" she stopped her gaze and fully flung her attention to Fancy "She was? Oh how horrid.."

".. I say, you really do not know?" Fancy shook his head, seemingly not quite used to Fleur's short attention span despite having her as his company for very long now "A monster that as of this moment has not been caught, killed all her pets and almost Fluttershy herself. Really Fleur, everypony knows what happened! The princesses themselves are attending the funeral as we speak"

"My goodness... I haven't noticed..."

"You never notice anything, darling" he gave her an understanding smile, not judging her for her lack of interest on virtually anything but herself "It also happens that our good friend Rarity is very close to Fluttershy herself. I sent my condolences through her for the poor pony, but of course we simply cannot attend the funeral since we are, as always, very busy" Fancy took another sip at his tea, which became inexplicably colder to his taste

"... I... I don't remember meeting Rarity lately"

"My dear, of course you don't" he smiled at her rather kindly again "You simply have your head high in the clouds that day, as always of course"

Fleur felt her cheeks redden and bowed her head from him, embarrassed at herself - something that happens so rarely to her. Being always confident of oneself all the time is a routine when you're a glamorous super model

"Fancy my dear, you always go around and point the worse in me" she faced the dashing gent, her face a bit tilted to her side and her eyes seductively half-closed she was giving him a cute stare, complementing her facial features

He softly chuckled at her display "Why Fleur, you can rest assure that nopony is perfect - and of course, that you stand out from those ponies indeed"

She just continued to give him her look, unfazed by the double meaning of his words. He was going to continue until he caught sight of a large puff of black smoke from across the street. Instantaneously a large creature standing on its hind legs appeared within the fog, gaining the attention of the nearby ponies around it.

"... I say..."

The creature looked hideous. Even from this distance he can tell the creature was wearing something red on what seems to be its head with nothing else covering its scarred fleshy body. It was carrying something on its claws with some bottles strapped somewhere above its legs and carrying something like a saddlebag

"... What in Equestria is that?"

"Oh Fancy, you always were the charmer"

The creature roared something... for some reason he thought he heard it speak common. He wonders what this creature is called and how come he never saw something like it before.

"...Hmm? You look like you've seen a ghost... oh my goodness, is there something on my face?"

Something flashed from that spot accompanied with a loud sound of explosion. The sound faded as soon as the flash of light from the spot with a nearby pony stumbling to the ground revealing... several large wounds... from it.

The sound caught the attention of everypony near the street, but for some reason the ponies in the cafe is completely oblivious of the scene from there, even Fleur as she hold up a mirror using her magic while inspecting her face

Fancy Pants couldn't take his eyes from the creature. Another explosion happened with another nearby pony wounded from the spot, its blood littered the store and floor. From what he could tell, the nearby ponies are already panicking at such magic running to and fro. Finally the ponies at the cafe took notice of the incident and began to shift their attention to the screaming ponies.. all except for Fleur, still scouring her reflection on the mirror


"Everybody say HEEEY!!" despite the distance, Fancy pants heard the monster's scream almost clearly. It really did speak common! .. but what did it meant?

Everypony in the cafe knew they were in immediate danger and began to leave their seats as soon as the monster faced the cafe. Except for Fleur still occupied with her mirror and Fancy himself too stunned while studying the creature, everypony began to panic as the bipedal hurl one of the bottles hanging from it at their direction

A fiery blast of light blinded him as it somehow numb his other senses, all he could feel was a high pitched ringing penetrating as he feel his flesh peel from the light. He almost heard Fleur scream in shock all but for a short time, lost forever. The last thing he only held on to was the thought of what this creature could be... and what could be happening at the mind of such a monster, without any remorse of its morbid actions.











"Tenenen-tenen-tenen-tenen-tenenen--tenenen-tenen-tenen-teneeeen!♪♪..."
"...Tenenen-tenen-tenen-tenen-tenenen--tenenen-tenen-tenen-TEEEN!♪♪"



Deadpool doesn't remember the last time he actually had fun like this. There's a certain knack you get when killing random people (or in this case, ponies) that isn't really necessary to the mission at hand - helps alleviate stress a lot. It's amazing how killing can help you in many ways without any of that lame guilt being in the way.

"Ho-Holy shit! Oh my god, this is so freaking awesome! HAHAHAHA!"

Ah, the sound of screaming people everywhere... well, ponies... damn, this cruelty to animals will definitely smear his chances to score some supermodel chicks, probably all of them are an advocate for PETA or something. Still, nothing feels more empowering than killing random innocents as they flee in terror at your bloodlust and/or the sight of your hideous body

Walking through the street he picked off the slower moving ponies as they flee from his Deadpool wrath - oh yeah! They all look pretty ridiculous though, almost all of them are wearing fancy clothing normally everywhere from glittery gowns to freaking tuxedos... what is this, National Geographic: Prom Night edition?

"Yahtzee!" He threw a grenade bottle hooked from his waist to a store that's probably a flower shop from by the looks of it across the blown up fine-dining restaurant sending out a lot of lower debris and a few pony parts

That was fun to watch. Deadpool checked his waist to see how many bottles he has left. Eight bottles left strapped around where his pockets used to be when his costume haven't blown up yet... Okay! remembering that encounter pissed him off again, but he IS here to relieve himself from a lot of frustration and stress though.

A whole lot of motherfucking frustration and stress.

He heard the voice of a woman crying inside the shop (which blew up and is on fire of course, thanks to Deadpool's stock knowledge from the Anarchist Cookbook), a light yellow pony with rosy red mane crawled out from the fumes, its stomach and half of its face bloody as it drag itself on the ground. He cocked his DIY shotgun as he aim the weapon at the limping pony. Hehe, 'cocked'... Catching his attention, the pony frantically tried to stand and run away from him but its efforts would be for naught as Deadpool blast of its head from the short distance, its brain littering the side of the ground.

Medium ranged shotgun - fuck yeah! You never really truly appreciate the wonder of guns unless you made one yourself and killed something with it - like a real man! He'd like to see the current iPhone generation kids do that. Remember kids - Real men make and kill with their own fire arms! just ask Teddy Roosevelt.

"Halt! Stand fast, you monster!"

Deadpool turned to his back to face the several large horses in shiny gold armor. "Oh look - the cavalry finally came. Seems I’m about to get knee-deep in the dead here"



There was panic somewhere in the streets. Several ponies alerted the guards to a mad creature using mysterious magic to kill everypony at the financial district of Canterlot. Flash Sentry, a new recruit to the royal guard was usually at his shift patrolling the castle but his senior officer sent him and two other experienced guards to the scene.

Leaving the castle, they ran into a large crowd of ponies fleeing from where the suppose monster was killing everypony. Flash, along with the other guards can see a trail of smoke from somewhere. From the screams of everypony else the monster seemed to have used its peculiar magic to set fire onto several businesses.

"Okay, the creature is definitely hostile. Remember your training Flash, don't lose focus" he whispered to himself, remembering his duty to preserve the peace and uphold order. Secretly he has been waiting for a time like this his entire life, now he can finally prove himself to everypony including himself how much he is capable of

"From the looks of it, this monster seems to be very capable. Remember, our orders are to distract it long enough for Unicorn Team to arrive. We don't want to attract more trouble than we have to" the beige earth pony reminded the two other stallions of their objective given to them by their commanding officer as they rush toward their mission

"What about Pegasus Team? How come we're the one tasked with distracting whatever the thing is and not them?" the white stallion remarked, seemingly defiant of the wisdom of their orders

"I don't know, but orders are orders"

The three royal guards finally caught up with a peculiar figure down the street, it was carrying something large and using its magic they saw it kill somepony at the flower shop

"Halt! Stand fast, you monster!" the beige stallion commanded to the creature as it turn to them in response. It was hideous to look at, blood covered its hideous coat as it somehow give a subtle smile at them. Flash almost lost his composure just by looking at it, but he had to stay focused. He had to stick to his training. He had to prove himself

"Oh look - the cavalry finally came. Seems I’m about to get knee-deep in the dead here" the monster spoke in a chilling voice. Flash can feel the creature's bloodlust as its grin impales him while blood caked all over its body, he instantly felt cold all over and his hooves involuntarily twitched. This creature made him fear for his life.



Three of the horses charged straight to him as he cock another... pfft... bullet to his shotgun and fire at the one in the middle with a headshot, immediately killing it. Blood from the awesome kill splattered at the two other horses but were unfazed by it all, not even delaying their tracks as they continue their charge at Deadpool. With literally killer instincts, he anticipated their charge and parried the impending blow of the armored horse on his right - grabbing hold of its neck in mid-dodge and mounted on its back - almost all in slow motion even.



"It's on me! The monster is on me!" Flash tried his best to shake the monster off his back, only his training made him resist the urge to run away from this monster as soon as it killed the white stallion whose name he didn't even remember. He hasn't even lasted a month in service but now he had to experience all this. Half panicking he shook his back while the monster tightly clutched his neck, its weapon between its claws he roared fearing more for his life than the mission at hand.



Expertly cocking his shotgun... my god, why do they call it cocking?... while keeping his momentum on the raging stallion, he pointed the gun gripping it with only his right hand and fired at the other confused stallion straight to the head. The recoil of the blast almost made him lose his handle on the trashing mount, somehow unfazed by the death of its buddies. These things were ready to die. He leaped from his ride to avoid the risk of his grenade bottles detonating, somersaulting away from the rodeo-trained stallion. 



Flash Sentry felt that the monster finally let go, but he felt too hazy to notice where. Sweat streaming under his coat, his heart pounding madly he darted his eyes wildly at every direction. His bearing lost, his body cold, an uneasy twitching present in his body all made it a lot less easy to the new recruit. He didn't signed up for this sort of danger, or at least he didn't think he did. He definitely never anticipated he would be swept to a carnage like this. Seeing all the dead bodies of everypony in that street alone is enough to take its toll on anypony

The monster was nowhere in sight. Did it disappear? How... what is going on? Turning around again, he saw no presence of the monster except for the mindless slaughter it left in its wake, surrounding the royal guard. Several ponies killed in the middle of the street, the bloody mare from the flower shop earlier littering the sidewalk. A dismembered hoof lay nearby the burning cafe, a mass number of dead evidently inside it. How could the monster do so much damage in such a short time? As he ponders on his last thought, he instinctively turned back to the castle to report back on his commanding officer as a blue bottle lunge at him in mid-air...



Exploding on contact, the bottle hit the stallion around the face, splitting away chunks of flesh and blood. An eye from its head sling-shot from its socket as it fall unresponsive to the ground, its blue mane singed and its helmet somehow still intact.

"Would you look at that... You know, I’m sure somewhere out there, Michael Bay is having an erection... or maybe James Wan."



"Fire!"

Deadpool turned to the direction of the voice to see several unicorns on the roof of a building nearby firing some sort of magic spells at him. They almost look like some sort of plasma... laser beams or whatever, but sure feel like it when one hit him at his right shoulder. He raced away from the barrage of beams, narrowly avoiding the laser spells

"He's somehow resistant to destructive magic! Keep firing!" he heard one of the stallions shout to the other, which must be their commanding officer or something.





"Fucking Cacodemons!" still in evasive action, Deadpool turned and faced his attackers as he return fire with his shotgun

"Die Cacodemons! DIE!!"



The shots seem to be hitting the stallions but not to a fatal effect. his scatter shot doesn't work well in long distances. Enduring the blows from the unicorns' magic hitting him everywhere on his upper body, he sidestepped to another direction as he throw another grenade at their direction exploding nearly a short distance from their footing, crumbling the building and sending them down to the ground below. For good measure, he threw several grenades at them making sure they're all brutally dead. 

"HAHAHAHAHAHA!!! WOULDN'T it be NICE, if WE were OLDER - THEN we wouldn't HAVE to wait so LOOOOONG!!♪♪"

Deadpool seemed to have thrown a third grenade as he laugh maniacally while several incinerated equine body parts and internal organs scatter from the explosions.

"AHAHAHA!! The happy times currently I've been spending. 'Wish that every kill was NEEEEEEVER ENNDIIIIING!♪♪ HA!"

Deadpool almost didn't feel his body regenerate from the laser blasts as he laughs with child-like glee while enjoying the senseless slaughter. Like a sadistic youth with his handy magnifying glass, needlessly setting fire to an innocent enough colony of ants.

Holy shit. What is with all the similes he's been making lately? With all the comparisons he made since landing in this universe he probably have enough to fill half a season of Family Guy. Deadpool calmed down after dispatching the unibeam, seeing as that the place seem to have a fairly moderate defense he felt that he should take this time to gear himself up before continuing the slaughter

Okay. Inventory check. Only three grenades left. And around three-fourths of his shotgun ammo left. Part of him feels like packing up and go home since this is enough of a test run of his new equipment but another part of him feels like fucking up more shit and have more fun.

"Well I still have to test the big gun. Don't want to forget this baby" he gave a pat to the large weapon strapped around his back "After all, ironically this is the easiest one to assemble back at the tree house. I still can't believe how many dangerous chemicals a voodoo can have! AND a substitute for gunpowder, even!"

{{You've had your fun now. Now we need to get out of here before the elements come}}

"Always with the element talk with you, can we not worry about the elements for.. at least a while?"

{{No. We CAN'T}}

"Pfft. The elements won't come yet! Stop sounding like my mother for a while and enjoy the mindless killing, will ya?" he loaded his makeshift shotgun with more of his diminishing ammo and continued walking through the streets

{{Listen Deadpool. You are attracting a HELL lot of FUCKING attention}}

"Stealth was never my forte"

{{IF the elements come here, we're under-prepared for that encounter. You don't have your swords, your guns--}}

"In case you've been sleeping for the last few hours, I made several grenades, a working DIY SHOTGUN, and this big fucking gun."





"First off. I need a weapon"

Deadpool stood hands on his waist at the entrance of the voodoo tree house he got the map from earlier deep within the recesses of the forest where he met the zebra. He knew as soon as he first visited this place that there are tons of voodoo stuffs here that will definitely be useful for making non-voodoo stuffs too. maybe. probably.

{{What made you think you'll find a good weapon here? Don't tell me you're going to kill everything with a spear}}

"Not a bad suggestion. But no. We're not looking for a weapon, we're going to make one here!" he raised his hands to the air, his victory shout faded to the dark empty room seemingly untouched even after the death of its owner

{{...What?}}

"Really? if you're in my head, how come you can't even anticipate what I’m thinking?"





{{Your big fucking gun won't do us squat if the all the elements show up RIGHT NOW!}}

"Would you fucking relax? They're all very busy crying their hearts out at the funeral now, and didn't Pinkie tell us the princesses are right there with them? It's not like news will reach them that fast" Deadpool looked over at the distance to see several flying armored horses rushing from the city to... somewhere "Oh crap. I didn't know some of the horses fly"

{{Great. Those guards are definitely going to send news to the elements about this massacre. Good job, genius. WELL DONE}}

"Hey hey hey! Don't forget the big fucking gun!" He started to unlatch the big fucking gun from his back but a distant sound of something twinkling in the sky somewhere caught his attention

"What the fuck?" he stopped to listen to the seemingly out of place tune of some fairy sparkling sound effect somewhere near and approaching, turning to several directions he finally caught sight of the supposed allegory for homosexuality. A large serpent like creature was... gliding or twitching in the air or whatever as it approaches our hero, an eyebrow raised at whatever the fuck this thing is

The large serpent like creature landed with a loud thud in front of Deadpool, the creature looks a lot like a large Chinese dragon around maybe 9 to 11 feet tall... or maybe a Chinese knock-off of a 'Chinese Dragon 'around maybe 9 to 11 feet tall. This thing looks like it born form the mind of a Greek mythologist. on crack. Its head was a goat with an antler and a horn, a claw of a chicken and a lion, a leg of a bull and a... dinosaur? and a tail of... well, a dragon. Pretty sure an imprint of 'made in china' is around it somewhere, Deadpool just can't see it from where he's standing

"Well now. Of all my years on this plane of existence I've never seen a hideous creature like you before" The Chinese take-out dragon kind of spat an inquisitive tone at him, it's yellowish sick eyes narrowed with his brows 

"Look who's talking. What the fuck are you?"

"I.. the 'fuck' am Discord" it drew its lion claw to its chest, introducing itself "the spirit of Chaos, and Disharmony. And you" it then pointed its claw at him "are stealing my thunder" its claw reached to Deadpool and pulled a static lightning shaped... cartoon effect from somewhere in Deadpool like that coin magic trick magicians always do "I'll have that back now, thank you"

"...Okay. I-"

"Is what I would say normally. But I’m a reformed draconequus now and I keep the chaos to a down low these days, especially since my friends got nearly murdered"

The pirated dragon encircled Deadpool, and slithered in front of him "I'm not one to judge, but you seem awfully familiar"

Glad to see the ponyslaughter didn't tip him off "I don't remember meeting a Class C Chinese dragon like you before. But given the cast of characters I've stumbled into so far, I don't think anything's going to surprise me"

"Speaking of surprise - I was taking a good morning's sleep at my quarters when all of a sudden, somepony reported to the guards a mass killing in progress at the financial district. Nopony's ever killed anyone in generations even during my rule let alone here in the capital of Equestria"

The capital of...? Oh Pinkie, you bitch

"I was woken up because the guards couldn't handle it. So imagine my surprise when I got here to see a creature that somehow resemble my friends' description of the supposed monster that almost killed some ponies in the last few days. A tall zombie-pony like creature wearing red... the murderer was never caught BUT it left behind a lot of ripped red cloth behind"

"My condolence to your friends. Really, I should have tried to kill them harder"

"You heartless fiend" the dragon stood tall in front of him, the tone of its voice descended "of course, you were the cause of all this killing in the city too I suppose? Does a monster like you have a name or something?"

"Sure. I... the fuck am Deadpool" he aimed and cocked his shotgun at the creature "The spirit of BAD-ASS, and DISMEMBERMENT!" Hehe. Cocked.

He pulls the trigger, excited to empty his pump action shotgun at the beast as he was accompanied with the sound of squeaking rubber.

He pulls it the trigger again only to hear the sound of something like a squeaky toy

"What the hell?" Deadpool looked down at his shotgun only to see a balloon shaped pony in its place "WHAT THE HELL?"

"I knew that was important. Maybe that thing was magic perhaps?" 

Deadpool looked up at the dragon giving him a smug, the kind that douchebags wear on their face all the time "You bastard! That thing was more than magic to me! Do you even know how hard it is to make a shotgun?!"





"Hmm... this black powder thing seems to be a good substitute for gunpowder" he held up a large bottle filled to the brim with powder stacked inside a cupboard "It's going to be a bit complicated making the mechanics, but I think I actually have all the parts in this tree house!"

{{... How... are you going to make a shotgun out of... that and wood?}}

"Hey - To invent, you need a good imagination and a pile of junk. And I have a good imagination, my right hand would vouch for me if it could"





"... What the fuck did you do to my shotgun?!"

"Isn't it obvious?" the dragon pointed its claw to the balloon pony at his hand "I turned it into that! I'm the spirit of Chaos you fool... with just a snap and a zap --"

The creature snapped its... claw fingers?... as a steel cage magically appear, imprisoning Deadpool "Any other chaos wouldn't last.."

"... Ohhh shit" Well, he's in trouble now. Deadpool held the bars. Yup, genuine steel cage "Hey, are you like that rhyming zebra I killed earlier? Because hearing you rhyme would be fun"

"Oh shut up" using his magic, Discord lifted the cage up with the monster's claws still clutched to the bars "I'm keeping you locked up until the princesses arrive. I'll let them figure out how to deal with an inconvenience like you"

"Ha! Trust me, you don't want to keep me alive" the monster retorts back with a dark tone, it angered Discord even more

"Oh, I DON'T want to keep you alive! I maybe the spirit of Chaos, but I never did anything like what YOU are doing. You think this mindless killing is fun?"

"Of course I do. I expect the... Spirit of Chaos, and Disharmony would understand!"

"I'll tell you what's fun --" Discord directed a full scowl at the hooligan "FUN, is making things out of proportion without regret. The kind of Chaos that gives rabbits hideously long legs, cotton candy clouds rain chocolate, and maybe even hypnotizing everypony"

"You mean taking crack?"

"Having the ponies killed - or outright killing them is out of the equation! There's value in life, it's what messing them up even more fun! Take that away, nobody haves fun"

"I beg to disagree"

"Oh?" Discord leaned his head forward to the cage suspended in mid-air by his magic "do you now?"

"Yeah. Take this for example--"

Immediately the monster inside threw something at him. With little time to react, the thrown object detonated at him with such a strange magic burning his face off. "AAAAAAAHHH!!!" He screamed as he feels his face tear itself apart from the blast, shifting his attention he lost his focus on his magic leaving the cage plummeting to the ground.

The pain made him shake his head side by side, hoping the dreaded sensation would subside. After what seemed like enough time, Discord tried his best to ignore the pain as he check on his prisoner. The cage lay on its side at the ground nearby, with the bars seemingly... melted. The monster must have escaped while he was in pain!

"You see?" Discord turned to the voice behind him. The monster stood in a defiant way, its face occupied with an evil grin "Now THAT... was fun"

Discord underestimated this monster. Without a second thought he decided to fly away from the monster, he knew he was unprepared and this monster was unpredictable. 

"Oh... forgive me, Celestia" raising his disproportionate wings, he took to the sky fearing for his life. His face still searing, his dignity tarnished, he flew as fast as he could to the castle hoping that he would find a way to stop the monster and that the princesses would arrive soon to help even when he knew he has more power than the princesses.

... But does he?... or the very least, surely he can take on this creature?

... Right?



"Hey-HEY-HEEEYY! COME BACK!" Deadpool wanted to stop the dragon but he was too late. The dragon flew too fast for him to even continue "Aw maaan..."

He looked at the balloon pony-that used to be his DIY shotgun, dumped at the ground "Aww maaan... my hard work.."

He picked up the balloon, his brows met as he glaze over his former love. He heaved a sigh as he fail to let go of the frustration of seeing his work all for naught

"Shit... FUCK THAT DRAGON ASSHOLE!.... hold on, that didn't sound right... -- Oh well, now I have to chase it"

{{Chase? No. You're not chasing it down}}

"Yes I am"

{{NO. YOU'RE NOT}}

"Hey! I waited for more than a month for this chapter alright? I'm doing whatever I want!"

{{What could you possibly do? Your shotgun is gone, the Elements are coming - I'm FUCKING getting tired of you not listening to me!!}}

Deadpool suddenly remembered how soul-imposing his evil voice sounds. He either got used to it, or this time the evil voice is really pissed off

{{WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU NOT DOING WHAT I SAY?! ARE YOU STILL EVEN DOING OUR MISSION?!?!}}

"Heyyyy... o-of course I am!" Deadpool shook his hands at no one, as if the voice would calm down at that

{{Then WHY?!}}

"He-Heyy!... dude, the point of this whole massacre was to let off some steam!... relax, bro!"

Deadpool, not sure if he calmed down his pissed of consciousness looked over at the castle nearby and saw a silhouette of what must be the dragon earlier fly towards it "Look, I’ll do you a favor - we'll kill that dragon just for you, what do you say?"

{{Do me a favor and FUCKING GO ACCORDING TO PLAN!}}

"This IS according to plan!... Don't you get it? We're not just killing every animal here..."

He unlatched the big weapon on his back again and copped a feel... whoa, that didn't sound right either.

"We're shooting through and introducing ourselves, knee-deep in their dead"

{{So, you're breaking their morale huh?}}

"Of course"

Deadpool finally caught the scent of fresh blood, dead animal bodies, and the very faint sound of screaming ponies everywhere. With the big weapon on his hands, he started on his way to the castle.

{{I take it back. You actually know what you're doing}}

Oh you bet.
> Chapter 7: The End and Beginning of Disharmony
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------






Chapter 7: The End and Beginning of Disharmony
	

Discord hovered through the marble-stone archway of the main hall's double doors, his paw clenching on half of his burned face ever since his foray into the streets moments ago. He ended his flight at the regal red carpet stretched across the long hallway facing Celestia's throne as the stained glass windows give the path a shimmer while the floor muffle out every hoof and foot step of the Spirit of Chaos and Disharmony

The Spirit of Chaos and Disharmony. 

What used to be a badge of merit he would freely flaunt to anypony foolish enough to listen is now, what he realize, but a shadow of his former self. Bearing such a title would even more so be an affront to him now after living through what he now knows is the true spirit of Chaos and Disharmony: These past few days.

He kept his pace at the red carpet floor on his way to the iconic pedestal at the far end of the hallway passing through shimmers from the beautiful stained glass windows, light separated by gaps between the columns lined parallel to the wide hallway. This hall has been the center of many occasions, ironic considering that this is Celestia's throne room, supposedly the most secure and hallmarked place here in Canterlot. This is where he first met the Elements of Harmony when he was first freed from his stone-form imprisonment, the center where Chrysalis tried to invade Canterlot with her changeling army, and just recently where Twilight Sparkle officially broke the news of the first murders in Equestria since generations to the princesses, and him.

"Heeeeey Discoord!! Where you at?"

He turned to the direction of the monster's echo from the open frame of the doors where he came in. With a snap of his fingers the doors shut themselves with a loud thud and a large steel lock materialized between its handles. The noise still reverbing in the corridor, the beast following him would no doubt be alert of where Discord is hiding, but that's what he wants to happen

"Goodness Celestia, what's taking so long?" he whispered to himself as he back away from the sealed doors. From what he has witnessed of this murderer, he knew it wouldn't take long before it finds a way to him.

He needs all the time he can get.

He continue to pace toward the regal pedestal troubled as crucial time pass enough for the monster to follow, his gaze on the throne elevated atop the pulpit. Everypony else might argue why of all places - Celestia's Throne Room - is where Discord would lure this 'Deadpool' to. Why choose the very icon of Canterlot Castle for this monster to ravage?

He squints as a beam of light momentarily blind him, turning to its direction he studied the glass beautifully illuminated by the sun, its rays unjustly raining on his unworthy chaotic form. He approached the window wonderfully detailed with the image of The Elements of Harmony placed atop surrounded with their respective wielders studded with light. Below The Elements, the white mare between the farmer pony and the pink mare stood, their heads lifted up in attention to the two pegasi in flight, the image of the lavender equine levitating atop all them, everypony connected through three sets of halos signifying harmony.

This was the prophecy of the Elements. The one that foretold the eventual wielders of this world's strongest force and last resort to restore peace and balance. It's what turned him to stone, restored Luna to her form, turned him to stone again, stopped King Sombra, and it is what will stop... 'Deadpool'

He gazed on Twilight Sparkle's image, intrigued by how the Element of Magic was specifically placed above the two pegasi. Did this prophesied the eventual ascension of Twilight into royalty also? He scoffed as he remembered the day he danced on top of her head when he displaced his body onto the fragile arts of this hall. Nearing the window, he was caught by something even more fascinating as another beam of light flash before him.

The Element of Kindness with her head high and her hooves raised in admiration to the unicorn above her. Discord lifted his paw, reaching out to the very spot where light seem to escape from the window... interestingly placed at, and illuminating the light yellow pegasus herself.







"Discord? My.. what... what brings you here?" 

He stood at the door held open by the white unicorn's magic, her expression surprised by his visit. Maybe too surprised.

"Hello there Rarity... I was told Fluttershy is staying here?"

The unicorn blinked for a couple of times and shifted her eyes around him, wary as if Discord was here to stir trouble, which is of course understandable, but surprisingly not the case. "I ah... yes... yes, she is staying here in the meantime after... everything that had happened"

She shuffled her hoof, mistrustful of the draconequus that stood before her, his reason largely uncharted to her. Her expression leery and her tone quizzical "You are... here to check on her?"

"Yes I am. Is it alright to come in?"

"... I... suppose it is" She stepped away from the door, motioning him an uncertain welcome "She's upstairs in my room. Follow me"

Discord followed Rarity as he simultaneously step his hoof and foot inside her abode. He had hoped that by now everypony would be less tense around him. Then again, for someone who lived a meaningless life for what feels like eternity, hope was never on his side

Except once.

"I'm rather surprised you bothered to use the door, Discord"

She's right. He could have just whisked himself inside the house for all he cares. It would have made things a lot easier for both of them. There really is no reason why he can't do that.

"I figured that'd be appropriate considering the circumstances"

Yes. No reason.

The white unicorn slowly opened her room door as if it was the most fragile part of her home. Fluttershy sat forlorn at Rarity's carpet in total contrast to the lavish symmetry of the room, her back turned to them as her gazed kept fixed outside the window next to the mannequins  and the work table.

"She hasn’t said a word ever since she woke up this morning" Rarity kept her voice soft, careful not to disturb Fluttershy not that it seems like she could "Refuses to eat anything too, she has me worried all day... She and Applejack haven't taken things very well, I personally can't tell which of them is more aghast" 

"How about her cottage? Will she be staying back there?"

"Oh dear, no, I wish it not. It's not right for her to stay in that dreadful place. I'm sure my parents wouldn't mind if she stays here with us. For the meantime, I'll have to convince her to have her cottage demolished soon. Bad memories should be left where they are you see"

Bad memories. Discord's not really sure he knows how to handle such things. You'd think living for as long as he is would make you wise enough to know how, but no. And like everypony else, he doesn't like dealing with them. Perhaps his 'unorthodox' ways and acts were how he deals with them, or perhaps that's because he's bored. Or maybe, that's how he avoids them

"Let me talk to her first. I'll tell her you are here" She walked away from the door and approached the pegasus with care. Her head lowered and spoke something to Fluttershy cautiously. She didn't seem like it but Fluttershy subtly gave a nod at which Rarity nodded back in acknowledgement. The unicorn turned back to Discord, her gait as slow as she approached Fluttershy. "Do be gentle with her, please Discord"

He nodded back as Rarity went her way downstairs leaving them both alone in her beautifully adorned yet lifeless room. Fluttershy still leaned limply facing away at the window, her body completely still, undisturbed by their intrusion.

"Um. Hello Fluttershy! It's me, Discord!"

His attempt to ease her went unnoticed. She sat unmoved, silently gazing outside the window. He rubbed his arm. he was never good at comforting anypony... he never had to. There never really was a friend for him to comfort.

He slithered away to her side, facing her with mildly comforting eyes "Hey... Fluttershy! It's me... just wanted to see how you're doing"

Her eyes kept fixed outside the window with her face completely still. Discord glanced outside the window and saw a solitary tree standing in full view, its lush leaves swept briskly against the cool wind outside. "That's a wonderful tree outside, right?" he turned back to her. Still no reaction. Just her sad eyes kept focused on that one tree outside without even blinking.

He slumped beside her, annoyed at himself. Lost on how he could cheer her up no matter how little. He exhaled a quick sigh and stared back at the tree, thinking of what to do






The sound of the doors being bashed set Discord back to the present. Attention shifted at the giant lock bouncing against the doors, trying its best to not give way. Confident taunts savagely echoed behind the doors

"Let's make this quicker and easier for everyone and just open the door to me, alright? I got a quota to catch up with!"

The lock is not enough to block Deadpool as the door unevenly struggle through the barricade by the bashing. the other door began to chip away with every force the monster rams at its bridge.






"Are you sure about this decision, Twilight?"

"No, but Sunset Shimmer must know something that will help in this situation. Fluttershy and Applejack saw the creature with their own eyes and that's all the confirmation I need. I'm certain that this creature is from, or in a world similar to her.. home. Her knowledge of her world's resources and magic will definitely fill a lot of blanks, like how those trees were cut down but not even singed, and how the monster could transport itself very quick if not immediately to long distances"

The ruler of Equestria pondered for a moment, uncertain if she would let her pupil go. There is a yet mysterious threat possibly roaming still in Equestria and as far as she's concerned, proven itself to be intelligent.

It tried to attack the most powerful line of defense they all have. This monster is most likely trying to break this defense to destabilize Equestria... but for what cause? In the last few nights, Celestia with all her intuition could not conjure an explanation of why and who would dare bring harm to the elements. The fact that they have an unknown enemy, and a potentially able mediator is a dreadful thought.

"Please Princess, from what you told me earlier the portal will only stay open until tonight. I'll be very quick, I won't stay for a second longer than necessary, please"

"... I suppose there is little harm in sending you back to the portal. Okay Twilight, as soon as the funeral is over you may visit the other world again"

The young alicorn gave a sigh of relief and an assuring nod to the ruler in stark contrast to the townspeople and everypony else's unhappy demeanor. Some are listening to the mayor's speech while some are gazing to the ground contemplating about the events of the past few days. Strangely, Celestia felt that out of all those ponies, she is the one most concerned about them, the future, and Equestria.

Very strange indeed.

She could not stop thinking about it. It worries her so much that she's actually concerned about the whole of Equestria. Hopefully, if Twilight finds out more about the situation things will be a lot less worrying to her. Hopefully.

Deep in her thoughts, her luminous mane swayed along as she lightly move her head from side to side, berating herself for her constant worrying. After all, there is no cause to worry about something that might not happen, correct?

What's the worst that could happen?

Celestia's gaze kept at the brown mare near the three six-hoof deep graves, brushing her silver mane as her speech end. The sound of clopping hooves entered in soft applause while the mayor motioned for the stallions at bay to finally lower the coffins. They began on the sarcophagus on the left, interestingly the one that housed the first victim. The unicorns lifted her coffin with their magic on the the deep hole beside it, two other stallions shovel in hoof waited for its descent. 

They looked very simple. The bland woodwork did not do justice to these lives whose mortal coil will forever retreat to the earth, more so the stone slabs that will be erected above their graves. They were too simple... they were... depressing.

As the unicorns begin to lift the second woodwork, a glint above the soulless horizon took Celestia's attention. Her gaze slipped to light reflecting from several armored pegasi above the air, plainly exhausted, flying towards the funeral. As the princess study the sight further, soon everypony else of the crowd became distracted and gave way to the formation of pegasi soldiers flying towards and landing before the ruler of Equestria herself.

"Princess Celestia! We flew here as fast as we could!" the guard took a deep breath as his companions gasp for air, all of them looked more terrified than simply recuperating "We came to report to you that Canterlot is under attack!"

Murmurs began to sweep across the crowd, nervous looks passed to and fro as the princess enquire of more "Did you flew all the way here?"

"Yes, your highness. Apologies, we don't know how to reach you otherwise"

"WHAT MANNER OF ATTACK IS THE CASTLE UNDER?" the murmurs across the crowd amplified as Luna with her characteristically loud tone interrupted. 

"A monster is attacking the city with strange magic, your highness! Many ponies are dead and panic is everywhere" The crowd's undertone loudened even more as Celestia concerned herself about why the unicorn team didn't just use their magic to blink them all here

"WHAT DOES THE MONSTER LOOK LIKE?"

The guard thought for a while "Well - uh - it was tall, standing on its hind legs-"

"-it didn't have any fur - and it's skin was scarred all over and ugly!" one of the guards added

"Yes! and it was making magic with something long that it was carrying!"

Several of the guards nodded wild child-like acknowledgement. Celestia turned to her star pupil creeping up on the conversation, Twilight's eyes magnified and mouth agape in disbelief. The ruler turned back to the guards "Are you sure you have seen the monster clearly?"

"Yes. We were told to report to you the danger as soon as we identify the monster"

"All of you?"

The guard turned to the rest of his team and lowered his head "Well.. most of the stallions here fled from the monster and joined us. Apologies, your highness. The carnage was... very overwhelming"

"I understand" Princess Celestia turned to Twilight and the rest of the loudly mumbling crowd, she assert to them fairly loud and audible "I'm very sorry that we have to leave the funeral early, but there is a matter that needs attending"

The thrumming all but subside as Twilight began to voice "Princess Celestia, please let me come with you"

Eyes met, an uncertain look passed from the ruler "Twilight, i'm not sure if-"

"Please Princess, this could be the monster that we're looking for! You have to let me come with you!"

"Twilight, what's goin' on?" The alicorns turned to the farmer pony approaching them, not less confused than they are "Are y'all sayin' the monster's attacking Canterlot?"

"We're not sure Applejack" Twilight regretted to continue "but it could be the case"

"Then lemme come with ya!"

"NO" Celestia resounded sternly "I do not want to bring anypony else in danger"

"But please princess-" The ruler turned to the pleading alicorn "-at least let me come with you! You know i can help, and I need to know more about what's happening!"

Celestia retreated to her thoughts for a moment. Twilight is a much capable pony, but she does not want to risk more lives than she needs to. But if there's anypony who can figure out what's happening, it's most likely her star pupil too...

"TIME IS RUNNING OUT SISTER, WE NEED TO MOVE NOW"

She glanced to her sister. No wiser words have ever been spoken so far. Not thinking a situation like this through is very risky, but there maybe a better time to worry.

"... Alright, you may come"

The relieved pupil nodded and turned to the farmer pony as the latter embraced her, hope and caution wished "Take care Twilight, y'all be careful now"

"We will, Applejack" Twilight turned back to the princesses, her stature resounding "I'm ready"

Princess Celestia faced the guards trying to conceal their jadedness, to Luna's impatient eyes glaring at her, to the disconcerted crowd - the sound of their unrest not unlike that of a riot. She shut her eyes closed and meditated with difficulty despite the particular spell being habitually cast. Sky blue light engulfed from her long horn and surrounded the ponies around her.





The way to the castle was very linear. Too linear. Laughably linear. Stupidly linear. It's so linear the way is practically a straight line! He likes it when things are conveniently simple, but sometimes things are just too easy.

Regardless, here he stood in front of the royal castle looking royal as shit. No really, it's so grand it looks very much like a stock castle or some crap like that. The illusion of distance made the castle look taller than it probably is, the paint job is so sparkly white it's probably glittering, the door to the entrance were barred closed, a battalion of armed horses lined up at the fortress firing lasers coming out of their horns at him and shit... Eh, you know, nothing's perfect.

As Deadpool side-steps every laser beam coming with pussy fairy sound effects, he grabs hold of his second to the last grenade. Unlatching it from his belt, he blew it a good-luck kiss and threw away his beloved work of art at the giant shut doors as he evade every 'pew pew' coming his way. 

With the sound of sweet explosion entering the ambient crossfire he runs away from the castle and stopped. Steeled himself. Futile light shows surround him eager for his demise. A confident and bad-ass grin crept at our hero's visage as he rush towards the damaged doors vandalized by the explosion - still intact, but not for long.

Caring not to brush off blows thrown at him, he leaps towards the sturdy doors after saying a short prayer to the God of Thunder, Rock and Roll, and the Power of Greyskull - in that order, for their blessing while his rock-hard six-pack abs twist in mid-air darting his kung-fu legs at the unfortunate barrier before him.

Slow motion. He remembers the wise words of Master Yoshi 'Thou shalt leap like a grasshopper, young grasshopper' Deadpool took them to heart, his pose still imposing on the door, rays of light swarmed around him with agitated low-pitched 'woosh woosh' sounds. Time shifted back to relatively normal speed as Deadpool FUCKING HIGH-JUMPED THE SHIT OUT OF THE CASTLE DOORS - FUCK YEAH!!!

Through the wreckage he lands on the floor, crouched with his left foot forward and his right hand to the floor, his opposite arm turned away and doing the rock-and-roll sign like the true samurai ninja slayer warrior he is. He looks up. Inside, terror poorly hidden behind cold and trembling white pony faces surround him. Girly unicorn horns vibrating like the implied sex-toys they are, pointed at him, mayhap with implied homosexual intentions, or not.

He stands up. Scoffed as all the unicorns took a step back in retaliation and fear, without thought for gratitude to be near enough to bask in all his Deadpool glory... only one thing left to complete this intro.

Bad-ass one-liner time.

"What's the matter?" He cracked his neck and slowly twisted his shoulders, both for warm-up and effect, the stallions mumble unimportantly as he continued "You all sound a little..."

Wait for it...

"... Hoarse"

A no way too generic and fucking metal song started playing in Deadpool's head as all the unicorns lose their shit. He leaped towards the unfortunate unicorn in front of him as he was again greeted by the familiar barrage of swarming lasers around him. Grabbed hold on the stallions’ horn and placed his feet on its armored shoulders as he push away and twist at the unicorn's flickering tusk, breaking it away. The sound of dispelled magic entered the crossfire as cries of agony and horror follow in its wake.

Filled with bloodlust, Deadpool slid under the unicorn and using his new weapon, commenced to stab the equine at its underside repeatedly. Pleading cries fell to deaf ears, the stallion's struggles deterred as blood pour down with every stab from the dismembered horn. Its white fur littered red with every puncture, panic amplified as it pass from pony to pony, torn vital organs followed streams of blood slithering down from the stallion's vulnerable spot. Statistically, it's hard to stab anything to death. God knows Deadpool tried.

He slid away from under the wobbling stallion before it fall to its side, eyes losing vitality, voice hysterical and broken as vigor crept away from its trembling coil, begging for death's swift embrace. He leaped from the floor, footing restored as his legs carry his body and resisted a dramatic pause to shove his stabbing hand at the throat of the unicorn on his right. His free arm grabbed hold of its horns and controlled the momentum of the soldier. driving it around him in circles for evasive action.

Petrified and the smell of death lingering in its muzzle, the stallion gaped at its puppet master. An imposing maniacal smile stared him down - hungry for pain.

Eager for Death.

The Merc with the Bloodlust displaced his gaze quickly to each and the other unicorns around him, all of them ambivalent about attacking him. He let go of the unicorn's horn, slid his hand under its right shoulder and lifted it towards the ponies in front of him. The horn speared at its windpipe pulled itself away as he threw the guard at their direction. His spider-sense alerted him of a stallion behind him approaching before he delivered a quick and powerful high-kick to its head. The blow jolted its skull upside, breaking away from the neck - instantly taking its life as robust hooves gave to the bloody floor.

He turns. Several stallions before him, all terrified at the thought of attacking him trembled. Grinning, he reared his weapon as if to strike - he almost scoffed as the stallions all took a step back.

"BOO!"

All the pony horses didn't hesitate to run away, shitting themselves in terror. Deadpool couldn't resist laughing as the fucking dumb-asses trip over their dying buddies as they run to the exit. "Haha! This is so easy it's almost unsatisfying" it's as if his prayers have been answered when he turned around to see a straight formation of stallions all lined up with Discord - his primary target - standing behind them.

"Haha... please, Hurt me plenty" ... okay okay, enough Doom references.

An evil smirk and a raging glare exchanged from the faces of monsters. Deadpool stood mockingly, the sound of dying stallions around him all taunting the draconequus into action. Discord snapped his fingers and immediately the horns of the unicorns around him began to glow with yellow light.

"FIRE!"

Before Deadpool's eyebrow could fully lift, lethal yellow laser beams showered all around his direction. He took some hits. Intense rays burn through his shoulder and his chest clean through. "AAH! Oh shit!" danger now significantly higher, he quickly changed his strategy to the 'run away' variety. On his way, he grabbed hold on one of the random corpses the horses he killed earlier to use for cover. He lifted the carcass, its armor reflecting the lasers as he make his swift--wait. The armor is reflecting the lasers?!

"Wha--.. AHAHA!!" an ecstatic cry just came as he was now armed with a suitable defense! "FUCKIN' AWESOME!" He pressed forward the unicorns as he begin to use the corpse's armor as a weapon, quickly turning the tides. Talk about surprise attack!


"NO!" Discord immediately regretted to amplify the royal guards' magic with his. Celestia must have enchanted the armors of the royal guard against his magic! How could he have not known?! "STOP FIRING! STOP FIRING!" his words were muffled out by exchange of lethal magic. Fear kept the royal guards firing at Deadpool despite their blows reflecting to every angle, even theirs.


By pure skill, Deadpool shifted the dead unicorn's armor to reflect a beam towards a chain holding a large beautiful and intricately decorated chandelier conveniently located on top of them. Cliches are awesome. The sound of lasers were replaced by that of  thousands of shards of glass shattering on the floor, shattering on armor, shattering on fur, shattering on flesh. It's like hearing somebody getting shit at - but with class!


The fall took Discord off-guard as he try to free himself from the decor. Pain slowed him down as glass impaled all over his body, some almost getting in his eyes. His head only extended inches out from under. "Gah!... Goodness, why did this castle have such a large chandelier anyway?" still gathering his thoughts, he felt weight push him down as if something stepped on the rubble holding him. He looked up and saw Deadpool, his stance taunting and a smirk on his face.


Finally the time came. He reached for the large robust weapon on his back and giggled as sweet desolation almost near its course. He paused as he lifted the ultimate symbol of devastation in his hands and gave thanks to the lord Stan Lee and Saint John Romero for this kill he's about to reap. Finally, he aimed the work of art at the draconequus. The beautiful work of art known as The Gun. The Big Gun. The Big Fucking Gun. THE BIG FUCKING GUN 9000!

Okay I lied, there was one more Doom reference.

"SAY HELLO TO MY BIG FUCKING FRIEND!"

He pulls the trigger and watched as the BIG FUCKING GUN immediately melt on his hands and poured harmlessly all over the wreckage below.

... 

"... what the..." he turned to Discord's equally bewildered eyes "... uh.."


The draconequus pushed away the chandelier with Deadpool still standing on it, sending him off ground. Discord's eyes swiftly fell on the stallions around him, some groaned weakly while the others laid lifeless on the wreckage. Fur smoked where fatal blows from the lasers landed. This was his fault. These guards were dead because of him.

Unwilling to harm anypony else, he takes flight and began to think of the nearest place where nopony is at this time of day. Luckily, he knows just the place.


Deadpool regained his composure from the throw and saw Discord running away from the party. This was his last chance. He unlatched the last grenade strapped on his waist and looked at it with determined eyes. Time slowed down again as he threw the bottle at the chinese dragon rip-off in epic slow motion, his eyes on the grenade moving with deadly accuracy towards the target. With only a few feet away, he awaits the spectacle of sweet sweet explosion only to see Discord immediately spin around and catch the bottle in mid-air.

His eyes widened. He said a silent 'FUCK' as the dragon throw it back to him. Time traveled too fast as it sprang towards him and exploded at his footing. The eruption flared between his legs, bottle shrapnel and cinder singed and impaled around his thighs, nearly castrating him.

"AAAHH! AAAAAH!" Deadpool immediately fell on his back, his legs twitched in pain while he screamed like a little girl "AAAHHH!!! AAAAAAHHH!!! ....  AHh... ahh... FFFFUUCK! Another dick joke?! REALLY?! AAGH!"

Anger overtook agony as he attempt to stand. Ached grunts exhaled as his legs tried to lift his body "FUCK!... ah... WHO THE FUCK THINKS THIS IS EVEN FUNNY?! HUH?!" he turned as he heard the sound of one of the stallions he attacked choking on the floor. Its head twitched as blood drip endlessly from the hole of the neck. He walked and voiced towards it "You think this is funny? Huh? DO YOU!?" the stallion continued to choke as blood dripped and tears streamed down its eyes. 

"Look at me when i'm talking to you!" He kicked the stallion. No response "What does this universe have against my seed? huh? TELL ME!" He blasted his anger on the horse, kicking it again "TELL ME!" a few more kicks to the twitching stallion. 

He paused to catch his breath "... Okay... Fine then" He lifted his right leg and brought it down on the horse's side "This is for that time i fell on that branch on the forest!" He lifted his leg and brought it down again "This is for the time that bird pecked on my pecker!" He felt the cracking of bones under his foot as he continued pulverizing the stallion "This is for the time that squirrel took a bite of my nuts!" flesh caved as his foot smashed the stallion's body "This is for the dicks that loves these penis jokes!" The stallion tried to shut its eyes as its entire body shiver in agony "This is because I've erected that particular point!"

"This is because making dick jokes is kind of hard!"

"This is because of the ensemble of unicorns i had to finish up to get here!... whoa, that sounded wrong"

"This is for that idea even coming up!"

"And THIS is because I've spilled all the puns i can think of!"

"I think I wasted enough time"

Lifting his foot, Deadpool left the mangled mess that used to be the stallion and started to look for Discord. Going to the direction he assumed where the dragon left, he came across a forked hallway going to several other places in the castle "huh... Heeeeey Discoord!! Where you at?"

The sound of large doors closing echoed loudly far at the path in front of him "Well, that wasn't very elusive!" He ran through the hallway and soon enough faced the closed double doors. Noticing that there wasn't any doorknobs, he tried to push it open. The doors resisted his push, being barred from the other side. Of course it's barred. What a pussy.

"Hah.. like this is actually gonna stop me"

He moves to the side and faced the door on his right, rearing his right foot and brought it down at the base of the door. Seeing the door resist the Deadpool force, he reared at it again and smashed with even greater Deadpool force "Let's make this quicker and easier for everyone and just open the door to me, alright? I got a quota to catch up with!" as he continued to ram the door's base with his foot, wood started to chip away as it continued to resist the mighty power that is Deadpool's kick.

His foot finally went through. Wood shrapnels chipped his leg as he bore away at the hole, making it larger. Finally, he slipped inside and saw a relatively quiet and peaceful hallway adorned with beautifully decorated stained glass windows, a long red carpet extending from a throne atop a podium, other fancy stuff like columns and some shit - but no sign of Discord.

"Huh.." As he start to walk around the hallway, he heard a jolt of magic behind him. Turning around, he witnessed the opening he made closing as the doors turn into stone. Trapping him inside.

"Woah.." he looked around the hallway with suspicious eyes "heh.. you know... trapping me here may not be your smartest move..."

"You don't know who you are dealing with, Deadpool" Discord's voice boomed around the throne room, for some reason "I can easily make you cease to exist! The only thing more powerful than me is the elements of harmony!"

"Are you now?" Deadpool continued pace "given the amount of lasers you've all thrown at me now, you'll have to forgive my skepticism"

"You think I was trying to kill you? I was aiming to subdue you! I'll leave to Celestia the decision for your fate"

"Hah! What a lame excuse. Show yourself and make yourself look less like bullshit, will you?"

"I think not. Soon the princesses will come here, and you have nothing to do about it"





Celestia's horn glowed with tremendous restraint, her face grimaced with the effort to cast the teleporter spell. Her sky blue aura covering everypony around her flickered and finally vanished, darting her eyes everywhere in confusion.

"... My..." Her eyes turned to Luna and Twilight, both equally staggered "... My magic.. I can't focus my magic at..."

The ruler turned to Canterlot's direction at the horizon. Strong winds swept from her large wings as she retract them. The crowd watched as Celestia immediately take-off in flight directly to Canterlot in the distance.

"SISTER!" Luna lifted her wings and swiftly followed after her sister, murmurs amplified even more as they look on at their rulers in confusion.

"..What.. What happened?" Twilight turned to Applejack beside her, both of them confused by what's happened "... What?.."






"The princesses huh..." Things are starting to look grim for our hero. Looks like Discord is determined to keep him trapped here. Obviously, he needs to think of something. Fast.

Pondering for a few seconds, Deadpool studied the hall. Looking for whatever slight sign of Discord's presence "You know, I don't get you... If you're so powerful and able to kill me - why don't you just do it? You said it yourself that you didn't want me alive!"

"I don't" Discord's voice boomed around the hallway "I really really don't. I abhor you very much, honestly. But I promised to use my powers for good"

"You did huh?" His pace nearing him towards the end of the hall "That sounds lame"

"A monster you maybe, but there is hope for you"

Deadpool stopped as he stood before the throne that really is less like a chair and more of just a fancy pedestal. It didn't have a seat to be honest and is just a back rest... What the fuck kind of throne is this?

"There always is. Just like how there was hope for me... even when I didn't believe there is"

Deadpool cringed at the words "Ewwww! Where did you get your material from? The Disney Channel? Am I really not in the Disney Universe? I ain't so sure now..."

"I don't like you one bit, but so did everypony else with me before" The draconequus' voice lowered to a sympathetic tone "All of that changed because one pony believed in me... and I've never felt more fulfilled in all my life to finally have a friend"

... What the fuck is this shit? "Aww... ISN'T THAT SWEET? somebody grab me a bag to vomit in please! Tell me, WHO is this particular pony so significant to your change for the better?"

Discord kept silent. He sat on the throne and waited for a moment after his voice trailed off "... Okay! I’m going for a long-shot here...” he rubbed his chin as he think of an answer "hmm... this throne isn't really comfortable to sit at...”

"-- OH WAIT! I GOT IT!" a mischievous smile made its way on the Merc's face "Is it... Fluttershy?"

The hall kept silent as his words meditate around them. For some reason, the room felt inexplicably colder.

"It's Fluttershy isn't it? My Deadpool sense is tingling on the word Fluttershy..." He pointed his head for emphasis as the hall kept eerily inaudible.

"Let me tell you something about that Fluttershy..." He rested his back on the throne "I almost got her, you know? She's the one that lived in that cottage, am I right?"

"What do you know about her?"

"I know she's weak" 

Deadpool's sure he can feel Discord slowly infuriating "Laughably weak in fact. I mean, I'll be honest with you I’ve never seen anybody cry like she did when I killed all those animals... I mean come on, right? Who the fuck cries over their pets like that?!" he rested his shoulders on the mildly uncomfortable throne "I'm afraid that if I show up at... uh... Rarity's place, I’m afraid she'd die of six heart attacks before I even gut her open"

"How did you know about that?"

"You should've seen her face back there... I mean YOU JUST GOTTA see it to believe, man. I’m not sure if words--"

"HOW do you know about that?!"

"-- are capable to fully describe the agony I was fortunate to witness. Her hysteria as animal blood pour over me. Body parts. Flesh. Internal organs flying away with every slice of my swords... you can practically tell--"

"HOW DID YOU KNOW WHERE SHE IS STAYING?!"

"-- the light reflecting from her tears... damn. There's just no satisfaction like that, I tell you... haha... ha..." pestiferous laughs echoed while Deadpool continued to slump his back at the throne. "There I stood! - The smell of despair and blood surrounds me. My swords in both hands, I turned to the little cry baby - her eyes painstakingly red with tears--"

"Shut up"

"-- gazing at me with mercy that'd make Tobey Maguire cringe. Her heart shattered to billions of pieces as i--"

"Shut up!"

"--stepped over mutilated flesh, once recognizable as her animal friends. She grabbed a little rabbit next to her. I followed. My hunger for demise insatiable, I ran to the helpless pony with tremendous speed. The pony--"

"SHUUT UUP!!!"

"-- without strength and hope could not outrun the demon catching up behind her... Finally almost within arm's reach, her little bunny leaped from her embrace- sacrificing itself for her life. It attacked my fucking face and I tripped as Fluttershy escaped to my embarrassment... he he... either way, I only wished she was there to watch as I pulled the rabbit away from my face and began to squeeze it to death. Its eyes, I gathered, begged me to either stop or give it a swift death - none of which I granted as my hands tighten with each second. Bones cracked and caved inside, piercing whatever vital organs it can. Rabbit feces squeezed out from its asshole. Delirious cries gurgled out as vomit overflow from its mouth... ugh, I’ll have to remind myself to take a bath next time"


Deadpool looked around the tense and silent room. It really did feel very cold and tense around him "hmm... I guess I CAN express it in words! That was a good story now wasn't it?"

Complete silence endured. 

"No?" 

Silence. Complete and utter stillness suffered in the cold lifeless hall.

"Oh well, I’m sure Fluttershy will agree with me when I tell her myself"



The throne immediately exploded under Deadpool, sending him careening mid-air "AAAAHH! WHAT THE-?!!" faced down, he slid across the carpet several meters away before friction would halt him. He tried to turn upside, only to realize he can't feel his legs "AH!! SHIT, My legs!" As he pushed himself facing up, he looked down and saw both of his limbs dismembered - save for half of his left thigh and most of his crotch "AAAHAH! My legs... ah!..." He looked forward the throne and saw Discord towering before him. A terrorizing glare from the ghostly dragon visage peered onto him. Strangely... the first thing Deadpool feels like doing... is to laugh.

"AAHH! Ahh.. ha... haha... HAhaha.. HAHAHA!.. ha. You know... if you hated that chair so much you could have at least told me to get up before you blew it apart!"

"In all my years of existence, never have I resorted to kill anypony. Ever" He snapped his claw fingers. A magic aura enveloped Discord as his already giant form grew in size. Almost a few inches from the roof, he lifted his enlarged paw "You'll be the first. And I’ll do it very slowly... very... very slowly"

The tiles shattered underneath as he smashed his colossal paw at Deadpool. He lifted it only to see that the monster wasn't there "What?!" He felt a latching at the back of his paw and sure enough, the nuisance was clinging there "HEY!" He moved his forepaw swiftly to every side to shake him off "GET OFF MY PAW!!"

Deadpool kept resisting the strong winds trying to sweep him off. Swooshing back and forth, he timed the paw's movement and let go - sending him in the air above the hideous-dragon... thingy. Damn, what other synonym does chinese-dragon rip-off have? With swift precision he was able to shift his weight, letting gravity pull him down on Discord's surprised face, much to his misfortune, and much to Deadpool's fortune. Heh

"GGAAHH! GET O--" Deadpool slipped through inside his mouth as soon as Discord opened it followed by the sensation of blood dripping and pouring all over his mouth and tongue as Deadpool scurried through his throat making him gag. He grabbed his neck to try to push Deadpool out, but he finally felt him slid through.

"Yeah! Fu--ewRHWREHwwr!" Internal organ juice entered Deadpool's mouth before he could start to rub his stink through every section inside the dragon. Trying to talk was a really bad idea. "Frrwrrrfffff!" closing the mouth sounds like a good idea too. "Fwwmm?-mmh!" He closed his mouth. Bleck. The taste of blood juice is pretty disgusting. Deadpool's hand can feel some important internal organ parts within reach... Suddenly, a wild Trollface appeared on his face.


"AAAHHHAA!!" Discord fell to the floor as he felt his insides being pulled apart everywhere. He shuddered on the floor as holes punctured everywhere inside and innards continued ripping apart mercilessly. The pain made his magic worn off, returning him to his normal size, tears spontaneously erupting while his cheek laid on the floor, powerless. Vomit mixed with blood poured from his mouth, his raspy voice softened as his eyes kept darting everywhere with horror. Every second Deadpool is ripping away anything he can reach inside, and all he can do is convulse pointlessly.



They say that before you die, your life flashes before your eyes. 
What if you've lived since eternity? Do every single memory flash before you? Every single heartbreak, elation, and even boredom?
... if not, what memory would separate itself from the rest of your life?







Discord remained slumped beside Fluttershy, both of them gazing at the solitary tree outside the room's window. Wind racing softly on exuberant leaves, suffering the scrutiny of its two spectators silently watching from the comfort of Rarity's elegant chamber. He heaved a sigh. His gaze turned to the completely silent and still pegasus, her eyes sunken and mildly concentrated outside the window. He really isn't good at comforting anypony. He'd take all the help he could get if any just to cheer Fluttershy up. Usually its Angel who knows how to handle things like this... hey...

A content smile and snap of his claws, a small flash of light materialized on the spot beside the oblivious mare. She turned. The shape of a little white rabbit was clutching her wing. Her eyes magnified as she focus on the familiar form. It was a little white rabbit, clutching on her wing. But it's head was that of a goat. Of A draconequus.

"Hi Fluttershy!" Discord raised his little bunny paws, Fluttershy's gaze kept dumbly on him "Ah? You feel better now?"

She paused to study his form, Discord waiting for a slight smile or a little laugh in the least. A short moment of eyes slowly fluttering, a tear streamed before she turned away from him. Her head low. Silent wails alarmed him.

"Oh! Wait wait - don't cry!" Another flash of light and Discord turned back into his draconequus self "It's me! I-i-i didn't meant to make you cry! Uhh--" As Fluttershy continue to cry, Discord materialized a balloon. He began to shape the balloon into an animal and offered it to her "Fluttershy! Don't cry! Here! I made this for you!"

She looked up and saw the balloon animal in Discord's paw. She began to wail even louder, making Discord panic a bit

"No no no! Please don't cry! I’m sorry!"

The sound of the door opening made Discord turn to see Rarity and Twilight Sparkle at the door, a look of anger and surprise both on their faces






Discord's spasm intensified as he felt Deadpool burrowing through his bowels, monstrous little claws digging out from his posterior.

"aaaaAAAAAHHH!!!" Deadpool's head was the first to peek out from Discord's asshole. Pulling out his arm, he tried to push himself out "GROOOOSSSS!!! I am LITERALLY your SHIT! AAAAAHHH!! HAHAHA!" Deadpool finally got out from Discord's body. A pool of blood came out with him. "Nnggh... crap, I really need to take a shower now" he faced the twitching draconequus, remarkably still alive and conscious if not broken "Hah... I just went DEADPOOL in your ass! … Hey... that sounds right! I now proclaim 'I'm going Deadpool on your ass' a new catchphrase! I'll try using it often"

Despite all reasoning, Discord with remarkable strength turned his body to him. His claw pointing at him, twitching from the continuous pain he's under

"... HAH!... You just won't give up, do you?"

Discord with his ounce of strength fired a lethal beam at the maniac. Deadpool rolled himself away and the beam shot the footing of the column across him instead. His pupils expanded as the towering column slowly fall to his direction...






"Discord! What are you doing?!" Twilight ran towards them and embraced Fluttershy "And how did you get here before me?!"

"I-I'm not doing anything! I-I swear! I just wanted to help!" He waved his paw and claw around

"Discord!" He turned to Rarity's exasperated voice "I think its best that you leave now"

"But! I-"

"LEAVE!" Discord turned to Twilight's scowl, her hooves around Fluttershy "LEAVE! You're not helping!"

His eyes turned at Fluttershy wailing almost silently, to Twilight's offended glare, and Rarity's concerned face. Anger began to rise, he snapped his fingers and teleported himself outside the boutique. He stood and looked back to Rarity's home one more time before displacing himself back to his quarters at Canterlot.





The large column fell and crushed Discord's entire frame. A claw sticking out from the rubble among the large pool of blood splattered all over the column and the floor - the only evidence of Discord's presence in the room. Deadpool paused and savored the subsiding sound of the reverb of his well earned victory.

"Definitely not the first time you spilled bodily fluids on that spot"

As he try to sit himself up, he heard the sound of clopping hooves. The applause variety, you sick bastard.

[[YYEAHH!!! THAT. WAS. AWESOME!]] Of course, Demonic Pinkie Pie just appeared with a small trail of black smoke, giving an applause worthy to die for [[DISCORD WAS LIKE--WOOSH WOOSH! AND YOU WERE LIKE-WAAAH!-AND DISCORD WAS LIKE-AAAAH!! ANDthenyouwentinsideand TORE HIS INSIDES OUT! Or maybe in. ANDTHENYOUDUGYOURSELFOUTSIDE His BUTT!! HAHA!! ANDTHENYOUEVADEDHISMAGIC AND THE COLUMN FELL ON HIM! and SPLAT!! HAHAHA!!! THAT. WAS. AWESOME!!!]]

"Haha! Thank you, Thank you!" He waved his hands to her, because deep down he's really a humble guy "It was nothing, really! I wasn't even trying!" okay okay, he's a douchebag.

He tried to stand up as the demonic cheerleader continue clopping her hooves. Heh. He stumbled, seeing as that his legs haven't regenerated yet for some reason. It'll probably grow back in 30 minutes or so. He turned back to his kill, blood was spreading on the floor like crazy and the scent of Discord's inside is still lingering inside Deadpool's mouth and nose... interestingly, it smells just like Taco Bell. 

[[So? Are you ready to go now? I can't keep blocking this place forever!]]

"No, not yet" He approaches the puddle of blood around Discord "I'll just mark myself in history first"





Pinkie Pie and Rainbow Dash finally reached the rioting funeral. They stopped as ponies everywhere mumble loudly to each other, the look of anxiety on everypony's faces.

"Huh? Are funerals supposed to be this noisy?"

"It wasn't like this when I left! Something must have happened" Scouring the pandemonium, Rainbow Dash saw Twilight and Applejack at the far end in the distance "Pinkie! There's Twilight and Applejack! Follow me!" she zipped through atop the roaring masses

"Dashie! Wait!" Pinkie Pie pushed through the crowd as Rainbow completely leave her "Dash! Ahh! Oh, excuse me!" she pushed through several stallions "Sorry! Excuse me! Pardon me!"



"Twilight! Applejack! Why is the crowd panicking?" they turned to Rainbow Dash, Twilight began "The guards here told us Canterlot is under attack. For some reason, the princesses flew there"

"Huh? Why? Couldn't Princess Celestia teleport there instead?"

"... We're not sure"

"I reckon it might involve the monster" The two ponies turned to Applejack "Twilight, you saw what happened back at the farm! I’m mighty positive that the monster is doing some strange magic!"

"We don't know that, AJ. Let's not draw conclusions here"

"Well, what could it be?" Applejack retorted "You're the element of magic, you tell us!" 

"Guys!" Both of them turned to Rainbow Dash "I came here with Pinkie, she found some weird stuff from the forest"

At that moment, Pinkie Pie finally reached them "Whoa! Funerals sure are rioty!"

"Pinkie! Show them the saddle thing!"


Rarity saw the gang together "Fluttershy, stay here. I'll go check what's going on" Fluttershy gave her a weak nod and continued to her friends


"... I know that! The monster was wearing that! I’m sure of it!" Applejack was the first to comment about the belt Pinkie held in her hoof

"That is a really peculiar design" Rarity joined suddenly joined them "Where did you get that... saddle?"

"Around the woods where we lost the monster" Twilight, Applejack and Rarity gazed at Pinkie "If you think that's weird, you better see some of what's inside!"


Amid the riot. Fluttershy's gaze kept at the tree standing near Carousel Boutique, the one that she has been staring at for days on end. Even with the noise, the nest cushioned inside the branches felt eerily silent. Eerily silent of chirps. Eerily silent of cries.






After passing through innumerable corpses and panicking ponies, she finally landed before the castle. Blood that's all too familiar lately decorated the blown wooden castle entrance. She trotted inside, the smell of death lingered all over the corpses of her guards at the gate and the podium in front across the fallen chandelier. A familiar descent of wings landed behind her while she stood aghast the hall.

"...WHAT... WHAT HAPPENED HERE?" Luna exclaimed as she stood outside the castle, hoping Celestia would have an answer

"I don't know" She tried to steel herself, managing the many emotions she feels rushing inside "something was blocking my magic. I couldn't focus the teleporter spell anywhere near Canterlot"

Luna's face morphed horrified as her sister went further in the castle "SISTER!" She went inside, the sight of the guards brutally murdered in such horrid ways it almost made her puke. She followed Celestia further in the castle, passed through a chandelier that crushed the guards

"These doesn't look like hoof-prints" her eyes followed the bloody path to the throne room, on the way she saw a single giant slab of stone where the door should be "What?"

Luna caught up beside her "WHAT HAPPENED TO THE DOORS?"

"I don't know. Stand back, Luna" Celestia's horn and eyes glowed luminously as she point her horn towards the stone, unleashing a powerful jolt of magic that shattered the giant rock to pieces. Before the smoke could clear, she leaped inside only to be rooted to her spot as she take in the sight of the hallway

"WHAT IS INSIDE? WHA--" Luna stopped short entering the room and stood beside her sister





"That looks something the monster was carryin'! That really does belong to the monster!" Applejack pointed to a red mask designed with two large black circles around two holes held out by Pinkie

Twilight followed "... How did that fit inside the pocket?"

"Pinkie, can you hand me that saddle please?" Pinkie Pie gave Rarity the odd saddle, Rarity held it in her hoof and felt the rough texture to be very strange "the material is very peculiar, the rough texture feels very odd, not very much like cotton - not to mention this symbol" Rarity held what appears to be the buckle of said saddle that looked equally peculiar "I've never seen this.. emblem before, Twilight what do you make of it?"

Twilight took her turn to study the buckle "I don't know... I’ve never seen this sort of symbol before either"





The beautiful throne room was tarnished by blood and debris everywhere, Celestia's throne was blown apart, blood was everywhere on the carpet and tiles but most striking about this is the mangled mess of a large column on top of what could be a draconequus endlessly spilling out a pool of blood everywhere on the floor

"Discord..." Celestia slowly approached the slain Spirit of Chaos and Disharmony. Her hooves trembled in disbelief as she thread "Luna... bring Twilight to the Crystal Empire. Now"

After hesitating at first, Luna relented and rushed outside the castle as fast as she can. Celestia's gaze kept fixed on the column, but most notable the writing written in large crooked letters. Blood still dripped from the writing, meaning that it was just recently written. A large symbol of a circle cut with a vertical line with a dot inside each half was drawn next to a message written in Discord's blood





DEADPOOL WAS HERE





Light from the sun began to descend. At the stained glass window, the beam shining through the Element of Kindness dimmed.
> Chapter 8: Anti-Deadpool
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------




Heavy hoofsteps slowly ascended to her quiet retreat that is the lovely room of her good friend Rarity, only made empty by her presence. She sat unperturbed, facing the tree lit only by the moonlight right outside the window like what she has been doing for days on end - denying the truth by detaching herself. As the monster's steps slowly and slowly amplify, the wind blew on the tree suffering her sight. The leaves waved her goodbye as she wait for the creature to come in.

She had expected that she would take this less calmly. Meeting the one creature that has killed so many and made her lose so much, but she is done bargaining with death. Sadness has a way of giving you strength when you finally choose to have it. The loving times she had with her beloved... family... will never be forgotten and every detail of their grim deaths will forever be etched in her mind, but so is the strength that made her finally accept that they are forever gone in the present but forever living in her memories, and where there is life, there is hope. 

And where there is hope, there is life.

A single lonely tear dripped from her eye. A tear not of sadness, but of unique elation for knowing that losing so much has made her the strongest pony she knows. That she can visit her memories of her friends and shed tears not of sadness but of happiness, for when somepony is remembered they are never gone.

And so she will forever immortalize her friends by her thoughts, and knowing that one's life continues this way she has no fear of meeting her own demise.

The door creaked open behind her. Her attention turned to the presence she could feel standing at the door of the room.

"Hello Fluttershy"

She found her hooves slowly making her stand up and slowly turning to face the monster who made her stronger. The large creature stood, its entire body of dead flesh was covered only with a red mask on its head and straps across its chest. She stared at death's face with no ounce of fear, for she knows she's stronger than him. 

This strength did not stem from a desire to avenge her friends, nor to fight for her own life - but from knowing that whatever happens tonight, she lives on. One way or another.

She has finally accepted.

"Hello Deadpool"









Chapter 8: Anti-Deadpool


"OOOOOOOOOooohhh..." 

Deadpool wrapped his hands around his grumbling stomach as he laid down on the cold barren ground of hell dimension or whatever the fuck the place is really called. The rocky ground is red, the entire background of the place is black with distorted red shapes everywhere, and the only company this place have is Pinkie the friendly demon horse - which by the way, given the fact that it isn't really comforting, but, you know.

"HHHHHHOOoooohhhhhhhh.... Oh my god, my stomaaach..." 

Deadpool, The Merc With The Mouth rolled a little on the floor still wrapping his hand around him as his stomach eat away itself "Hooooly shiiit..."

[[What's wrong?]] 

Pinkie Pie, The Creamy of Some Pasta approached our hero in need as he continued rolling on the barren ground of her home or something. It was she that brought him to this probably literal hellhole and for all he knows probably the only one who can. There are likely more things this creepy little pony can do since it so happens that she was the one that dragged him in this universe in the first place, but anyone's thinking can get a little screwed when they're hungry.

"I am so goddamn fucking hungry, that's what's fucking wroooooOOOHHH!" He twisted his body as the pang of hunger surprisingly take him over "OOHHH my god! Why the fuck does getting hungry HURT THIS BAD?! AGH!"

[[Wow. To be honest, I don't know why I didn't think you'd need to eat. It has, after all, been days since you've been here]]

He rolled on his side to face the demon horse with an understandably pained face "I don't really keep track of time since I don't have a watch, how long HAVE I been here?"

She glanced up to think and returned back to him [[Maybe around 4 or 5 days. With all that 'regenerating' I saw you do, I just thought you didn't need to eat or drink really, haha]] she chuckled with an embarrassed face. Not a very common misconception, but it happens. [[Plus, ponies can live for a week without food but only two days without water]]

What does that have to do with him? "Two days without water?" Whoa... when was the last time he took a drink? ... Oh yeah, just hours ago in Discord's insides. Blegh. "UUUGHHH..."

{{I will admit, this is a slight oversight on all our parts. Let's just get you rejuvenated and we can continue our work}}

Red Box, The Caption With No Fuck finally entered the conversation, like what he does once in a while in case we all forget about him. Deadpool by the course of time has been listening to him since the first issue of Deadpool Kills The Marvel Universe so there's no need to describe his threatening evil voice that echoes low pitch bass sounds every time he speaks that would make Skrillex commit suicide. Yep, no need. Red Box isn't really his name, Deadpool only now just thought of naming him that so it would be easier to describe him. He wondered why he didn't thought of naming him that earlier.

Speaking of no need to describe voices, there's also no need to point out that demon Pinkie Pie here sounds like a distorted teenage girl's voice mixed with metal gratings and occasionally baby cries echoing in the background while she speaks, plus it doesn't help that she has glowing dots inside her skull for eyes. Yep, really no reason. Leave it to Deadpool to be unusually observative while he's goddamn hungry.

{{Are you listening?}}

"What?" He tried to stop rolling on the ground for a while "I'm sorry, I'm goddamn hungry. I only pay attention to my stomach when I’m goddamn hungry"

[[I don't have any food or ingredients on me so I can't make you some cupcakes]]

"Oh, too bad. Really"

[[Yes. This feels so cliché, but it looks like I’m bringing you back to the Everfree Forest again]]

Ah! The Everfree Forest! Of course everything begins, happens, and ends in The Everfree Forest! Everybody knows that! "Really now? How is sending me there going to feed me? I've been there, like, several times now and I haven't seen a single edible looking fruit or plant. Granted I ate that mushroom before, but I quit"

[[Haha! ... No Wade, only a few plants and fruits are not edible in the forest. And didn't you swore to be a vegetarian earlier?]]

"It's hard to stay dignified on an empty stomach. Plus, I don't trust the flora of that place" Deadpool stood up from the floor and approached Pinkie. He's so hungry he could eat a horse... huh. 

"... You know, I heard horse meat is pretty lean and good for your health"

The crimson pony raised an eyebrow and shot him an annoyed look.

"I'm kidding! I'm kidding! I'm not gonna eat you! Hahahahaha! Heh! Hey - seriously, cut that out, come on" he raised his hands and slowly backed away while she stared him down with her soul-burning gaze while the red shapes on the background behind her began shining "... But still, I need to eat and the point still stands so..."

The shapes stopped shining and returned back to their dim form while Pinkie held a hoof to her chin [[Hmm. Well, technically you ARE right. Pony meat IS lean and good...]] she rubbed her chin some more and brushed off her hoof [[Well, I guess you can eat pony]]

"Thank you!" He approached her with grateful eyes "Oh thank you VERY much! You'll always have a special place in my heart" he leaned down to her and held her hoof in his hands

[[You're not eating ME, silly!]] She took her hoof off him [[You're going to eat somepony else, of course!]]

"I knew that" He wiped his saliva off his lips "I was just going to kiss your hoof in gratitude"

[[Yeah, sure. Well you're in luck. For some reason, somepony is wandering alone in the Everfree Forest right now and I don't know why so--]]

"Forget it!" Deadpool turned his back and crossed his arms for effect "I'm not killing your non-demon version! I already told you I have enough of that shit"

[[I'm not talking about her!]] Black smoke trailed and she appeared in front of Deadpool [[She left the forest before you went to Canterlot! She's long gone. This one is nopony important, or at least to us anyway. She's totally killable]]

"Now who would be stupid enough to wander alone in the Everfree forest especially in a time like this except for me?"

[[Well, you'd be surprised how the multiverse is connected. Sometimes I still am]]

"What?"

[[Oh, and you'll probably need this]] She reached for something behind her and lo and behold, she stood before him and in her hooves were four very familiar works of art handed to him by fate.

"Is that?" He clutched the two blades from her "It is!" his two ornate Japanese one-handed katanas, wielded by only by the finest samurai warriors of feudal japan which he lost with his fight with Pony Akuma earlier. To have it back is to redeem his honor and he doesn't need to commit hara-kiri anymore.

"And this...?" He eyed the two remaining items while he sheathed the swords on his back. His hands gripped the handles of the items so familiar, he turned off the safety by muscle memory "My guns... My guns... Oh, how I miss thee my beloved" he held one to his cheek and rubbed it with glee. He smiled like a youth as he visit fond memories of people getting their heads shot by him, exploding faces and blood splattering on walls, floors, and other peoples' faces made him giggle 

"We shall never depart for thou wilt to be with me. This world of strife can't tear us apart, for we have each other... Hold on a minute" He removed the magazine of the gun on his right "EMPTY?!" and he then checked the other one "ALSO EMPTY?! Hast thou flung thyself to the care of another man? So be it, thou whench!" He motioned to throw the guns away "Have at thee!" before he could cast away his beloved, he was able to steel himself and lowered his hands in understanding "... Ah! How couldst I stay mad at thee? Thine faults are numbered but thine good works are innumerable... I forgive thee" and with that, he holstered his weapon at the straps on his waist. Now all he needs is his belt and his costume.

He turned towards Demon Pinkie Pie, she was staring at him with an awkward face. 

"What?"

[[... Nothing]]

{{Yes, Nothing}}

Deadpool cleared his throat "SO, how did you get hold of these things?"

[[Since Chapter six. They are surprisingly far away from each other, Big Mac beat you up good back there]]

Deadpool took a breath and a step back "Oh yeah, I forgot. You can do it too"

[[Eeyup!]] She gave him a wink and wrapped her hooves around his leg [[You and me Wade, we're the perfect team!]]

Her dead hollow eyeholes glowed dimly out of place with her innocent-like smile as he look down. Her fur, bloody red all over accentuated the hue of her darker mane swept to the side showing off her ghostly visage. Her entire appearance is the image of a little girl's innocence corrupted by dark shit. He remembered the pink pony she showed him on the crystal ball before. Even under stress, it looked so lively and carefree and... pure. Looking at her now, they're both so similar and yet so different...

"The perfect team, huh"





The dark forest of Everfree did little to assist her as she tread through the grassy knolls in search of the monster responsible for the chaos of late. 

Little light reflected from her teal coat. Despite her eyes practically adjusted to the dark now she can barely see her way through in her admittedly futile search for answers – answers that as far is everyone else is concerned she doesn’t need to know.
Everypony told her this was a bad idea. Supposedly, this forest is the monster’s hideout especially since it appeared and disappeared to and fro this forest. With the deaths of hundreds of ponies still fresh in everypony’s mind – especially Discord’s – plans to search the forest for the murderer is somewhat non-existent for some reason… well, some reason being fear of the unknown crippling any sense of urgency Princess Celestia usually have in situations like these.

You would think that the princess would task her neighbors—ahem, the Elements of Harmony to search and bring down this monster once and for all but word seems to have gone out that Twi--… Princess… Twilight Sparkle have gone to the Crystal Empire along with Princess Luna, for reasons left unexplained.


…. What’s in the Crystal Empire, Twilight?


What’s so special that you have to go there all the way from Ponyville while this part of Equestria is in a state of emergency? …. Does it have something to do with the monster?


… What do you and the princesses know that I don’t?


Her apparently robust hooves took her to some part of the forest she honestly isn’t familiar with – not that she’s familiar with the forest to begin with, this is practically her first time here and immediately she’s already lost.

Of course this was a bad idea – Of course she could be killed – Of course there’s no way she could protect herself from the creatures in the forests alone, let alone the monster. Basic spells won’t save her rump. But even if Roseluck got killed, even if Canterlot got ravaged, even if the monster’s using never-before-seen kinds of magic, even for whatever reason she can think of to not go searching for the monster herself…


… How could she really pass up an opportunity to finally see a human?


Her hooves slowed down on their own as a light gust of wind blew against her way. She stopped. The air slowly brushing through her felt strangely cold. Her eyes widened towards an almost unheard rumble somewhere around her. She slowly turned her head around her, unsure of where it’s coming from.

“Who… Who’s there?”

The rustle continued. She took a step back, the alarms going on in her head telling her to run away and never come back went unheeded.

“Who are you?!”

She was not up to speed. She slid backwards when something big lunged from the woods and landed just inches away from crushing her. Pushing herself back, she rushed to her hooves and looked on as the moonlight reveal her attacker by a split second.

“Gah! A Manti-“

The swipe from a large paw threw her off her sentence and towards the trees behind her. Her back slammed against one of the trees and recoiled her to the floor.

“AAHH!”

She rolled to her side trying to ease the pain but her expression didn’t fare any better when she glanced toward the creature standing where she was a moment ago

She wasn’t sure if the moon was being kind to her or not when it illuminated the massive form of her assailant. It almost looked like a pony if not for the darker shade of its brown fur crowned all over its face. Its feline eyes dilate with desperation stared her down while two rows of canine teeth arrayed with saliva pooling down in small drops laid on the creature’s visage.
It moved a paw toward her, the tremble of its body somehow making it look surprised to see her too. Its ribs bulged from its chest meaning it’s apparently really thin despite its huge frame.

“nngh…”

The beast took another step. It exhaled a soft roar, more like a growl that you’d expect from something that’s been hungry for days. Or weeks.

The creature let the light reveal a pair of giant purple wings adorned on its back raised as if for flight. It drew closer until she can see its entire body still trembling at her for some reason

“… A manticore…”

She doesn’t need this right now. Not now. She didn’t come all the way here to go out like this.

“… Please… You don’t have to do this”

The manticore folded its wings and slowly lowered its body to the ground, poised for another jump. Its face frozen with a strange mix of disbelief, desperation, and fear. Almost like it was trying to defend ITSELF from her.

It stopped moving as soon as she moved her hoof to lift herself up from the fall and even lifted back a paw as if it was going to run away. She kept her eyes on it as she stood up from the floor, the moon’s light fully illuminating the creature inside the otherwise pitch black forest.  The longer she stared at it, the less she could understand what is going on.

“I…”

“WINTER, SPRING, SUMMER OR FAAALL!♪”

A voice somehow echoed all over the forest. They both shook their heads, trying to figure out which direction the sound came from.

“AAALL YOU GOTTA DOO IS CAALL!♪”

She watched the manticore circle around, its wings raised and ready to fly off. Somehow she can see a face daunted with more terror than hers just a few hooves reach from her and she doesn’t understand it.

Why is this thing more scared than her?

The manticore turned to her as soon as the echo died down. She can feel something heavy dangling below her heart. The air felt cold as her eyes locked with the manticore’s for a split second.

Something splattered on her face. Unflinching, her eyes kept locked on two lights shining on the face of the manticore that she haven’t noticed until then. She blinked. The forest became too quiet. The manticore slowly lowered its head bit by bit. Its four legs slid, giving into the weight of its body. Its wings bent to their sides, raised and stiff.
There was something holding on the back of the manticore’s head as it finally bowed to the ground. It looked like a pony but to her surprise it started to stand upright as soon as she saw it. It unclenched two long bars attached to the back of the manticore’s head as it stood, the light she saw earlier now reflected from the bars this new creature left.
They were swords… and this creature is…?

“AND I’LL BEE THEERRE – YEAH, YEAH, YEAAAHH♪…”

Her mind was blank all of a sudden, like this creature’s presence alone somehow removed her ability to think. Her hooves stayed put and her face kept unflinched, the creature pulled one of the swords from the manticore’s head and slowly pointed it at her direction.

“What? You ain’t surprised to see me drop in?”

Her thoughts slowly started to gather in her head while she kept still in front of the creature. Like she thought – the creature looked like a tall pony standing upright, it didn’t seem to have a muzzle and it was wearing a red ripped mask covering only the top half of its face. It looked like its fur was badly removed from its entire body leaving behind a scarred and dead flesh for its skin. When she looked closer the creature had what it looked like claws holding the sword pointed at her.
It’s just what she remembered it looked like.

“You’re… You’re a human… right?”

The human lowered its sword and stepped down from the manticore’s corpse. The steps it took towards her sounded like it was the only thing that can be heard within a mile from them. Her guess is that the human was towering twice as tall as she is. She could clearly see its face now just a few steps from her and her mind just went blank again when its mouth slowly opened to speak.

“It’s kinda sad that it would be here of all places that I would actually be recognized as human” it leaned towards her, narrow eyes staring directly at hers “… How do you know what a human is?  …What’s your name?” 

She couldn’t believe this was happening. She couldn’t believe she was right. She had always dreamt that one day this would happen and here it is now, before her very eyes, she has found a human.

“M-My name is Lyra. Lyra Heartstrings”







“... I hate to break it to you but that doesn’t sound human at all”

“Are you sure?”

Sunset Shimmer took a sip from her ice cream float and laid it back to the table. Twilight Sparkle, her former enemy and first real friend just stared at her as if she’s not being completely truthful – not that you can’t really blame her for it.

“Twilight, after everything that happened why would I lie from you now? Now the way you described what this creature looked – Yes, its appearance do resemble humans – but appearing and disappearing in Ponyville killing three ponies and tenfold of animals a mile apart in less than an HOUR?! And… killing around a hundred…” 

The other people in the ice cream parlor started looking at them while Sunset ignored Twilight hissing at her to quiet down. She slumped back to her chair. “A HUNDRED ponies in Canterlot in that much time just yesterday? That’s not something a human can do, Twilight!”

“Sunset, please. I dug the Canterlot’s history archives before Princess Luna and I left for the Crystal Empire and there’s not a single reference or even likeness of this happening ever in history. Equestria has never faced anything like this before”

“You’re telling me”

“Listen to me” Twilight leaned over the table to her “You are the only lead that I – no, Everypony has on a chance to defeating this monster, Sunset” 

She grabbed her head to think. Sunset moved aside her ice cream float to make room for her elbows while she contemplated all this. Twilight didn’t like putting all this on her but the sense of urgency made her press on. “I need your help to identify what this monster IS to begin with. Otherwise we might not have a chance at all”

Sunset just kept still for a moment. Her forehead bowed to her palms, her mind rushing from one possibility to another and from one statement to another - the fate of Equestria is not an easy burden to carry. “This magic you described to me… Invisible fast small fireballs?”

“It’s how everyone described it” Twilight returned to her seat “… It is kind of hard to grasp”

Sunset looked away for a moment and went back to her “How was it making that?”

“They said it came from some long object the monster was carrying. It didn’t really sound like conventional magic”

“It sounds like a gun”

She leaned closer “What’s that?”

Now it’s Sunset's turn to explain things “Some humans carry these weapons which, here, we call guns. Some guns vary in appearance but the basic formula is the same – they shoot ammunition, usually called bullets”

“I’m not sure I follow all that”

“It’s hard to understand it by just having it explained to you. Especially since we don’t have anything like that back home. Here, they’re usually carried by this world’s law enforcement and military force”

“Usually?”

“Yes” Sunset eyebrows lowered and sounded more serious “Usually”

“Are you saying that this monster maybe a member of the human’s guards?”

“That’s not what I meant”

“I know” Twilight stood up from her chair to leave “I just hoped you did”

“Where are you going?”

“Take me to the Princess of this world”

She took a moment to take what she said all in “Are you kidding me?”

“NO I AM NOT KIDDING YOU, SUNSET!”

She raised her hands to Twilight to try to calm her down, her outburst attracted everyone’s attention from the other tables and the counter again “Twilight calm down please, let me explain” she motioned to her seat “Sit down, please”

Twilight sat back down and tried to ignore the judgmental faces of everyone else staring at her. She covered her face with her hands as she went on “I’m sorry- I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that- I don’t know what got over me- I’m so sorry”

“Listen to me” Twilight kept her head low when she took a glimpse of her “This isn’t Equestria. We don’t have a princess – if you remember, Princess Celestia here in this world is our High School Principal. Even if I get you the president – which I doubt I even CAN – who’s to say he’ll believe us?”

“He has to, Sunset!”

Now it was Sunset that’s hissing at her to quiet down “Twilight, I need you to think harder for me here”

Twilight sighed at her words. Sunset left her alone when she hid in her head in her arms. Twilight didn’t want to think for a moment and just allowed herself to let out just then – even a little. She felt Sunset’s hand on her shoulder, like it’s telling her that they’re in this together. For just a little while she wept. For just a little while longer she sobbed. For just a little while, she actually felt okay.

“It’s going to be okay, I promise. We’re going to stop this”

Twilight looked up, a few tears flowed from the side of her eyes. She squinted and gave another look to her friend and former enemy. The one who once stole her crown and tried to rule Equestria with its power is now the one drying her tears.

“Hey, let’s get out of here”

Twilight nodded and allowed her to help her stand up. Sunset paid for their drinks on their way out and just walked away from there, not really knowing where to go. Sunset looked up to the sky and stared at the moon for a while giving out its light from atop Canterlot High.

“What was it like here?”

She turned to Twilight, looking a lot calmer “I mean staying here in this world? – this High School?”

“Oh. You know. High School” She laughed a little. Now that she mentioned it, she hasn’t really gave it much thought “Flash and I dated back then”

“Huh?”

Sunset turned back to Twilight again

“- Oh right - Yeah. I remember the girls telling me before”

“… Yeah”

They kept walking towards nowhere in particular. Twilight right then thought it would be good to ask something that’s really nothing in particular “So uh, what happened back then between you two? – If it’s alright to ask of course - that is”

“We better get back to the portal before it closes”

“We?”

Sunset Shimmer’s smile felt so unnatural for her. Probably because this time she feels she’s going to do the right thing “That’s right. If I get a good look at this monster I might be able to help”

Twilight embraced her on the spot. She shifted and then tried to awkwardly return the hug.

“Thank you, Sunset. This means a lot to me”

She could see the school statue not far from them. After this night is over it will be another thirty moons to get back to this world.

“Maybe we should let the girls know”

“You know there’s no time for that”

Twilight let her go so that she can see if she’s really sure of this “There’s no telling what might happen. You don’t have to go with me”

“I’ll be fine” She kept resolute. Her eyes determined and her will immovable, she’s going to Equestria and by Celestia they will get this monster “We’ll be fine”






One thing’s for sure - bat-winged scorpion-tailed lion taste pretty damn fine despite sounding like it came from some poorly translated Asian menu. Or maybe it’s just his stomach talking. Either way this is sure to give Chinese take-out a run for its money.

It was a little while before he remembered that he had company in the form of a mint or teal or whatever pony shivering beside a tree. Jesus, how many colors do these ponies come with? Is this like a collectible thing? That would… that would actually be smart.

The little pony just kept huddled at the tree staring right at him like she’s never seen a man eat a lion with bat wings before. Or maybe she’s hungry too. Yeah that could be it. He pulled out a scoop from the lion’s ribs with his hand and handed it out over to her

“Want some?”

“No thank you”

“You sure? Ribs are always the best part”

She just stared at him and went back to brooding in her corner. Suit yourself. He hasn’t eaten for days and he still went out of his way to share. The magic of friendship, people!

“Umm…”

He stopped chewing on the lion’s liver and looked back at her. He waited for a few seconds before she talked again

“Do all humans… eat animals?”

“Hmm?” Deadpool wiped some of the blood from his mouth “Uh… yes? Well, there are people who won’t eat meat purely out of choice. I don’t know. I don’t care. Why?”

“Nothing”

Deadpool thought for a moment and it came to him “Oh Right! Horses don’t eat meat! I remember”

“Uhh-“

“Well what do you eat? Grass?” he waved his hand to the grass around them “There’s plenty of grass here”

“Ponies don’t eat grass. And meat”

Deadpool glanced at the half eaten lion between them and to its liver on his hand “Heh… This must look pretty horrifying to you huh?” then he took a bite from the liver again.

“Y-Yes…”

He downed the rest of the liver and went back to the lion “Okay” and then pulled some other gib from the lion he sliced open from the neck to the waist down like a frog “But I think we’re far far away from anything edible here except for this one. You ever had bat wings? Me neither.”

After a while of salvaging the dead, Deadpool thought he had enough of his fill and began carry on with the night. He stood up from the half eaten corpse of the lion and turned to the pony who is surprisingly still brooding at her tree. This thing needs something to do “Well! That was refreshing and everything but I do have a schedule to keep. Everyone’s not gonna kill themselves after all. Another day, another dollar for the working man”

Lyra looked on as he started to walk away “Wait. Where are you going?”

Deadpool burped and stopped walking “… Yeah that’s right - Where am I going?”

“Where ever it is, can you take me with you?”

He turned to face her and wondered about the gravity of what she just said. He chuckled and raised his shoulders “What?”

“I want to come with you. Please”

He shook his head “Why?”

“I don’t know”

“Then I don’t care”

“Wait! –“

“Look – You’re lucky enough to be alive just now all thanks to that lion over there. Plus – I know my reputation probably won’t precede me here but haven’t you heard of me?”

“… Thanks to the--? But- you saved me from the manticore!”

“I was hungry and that thing just came out of nowhere”

“But I still owe you my life!” 

“What the hell?” What’s wrong with this thing? “Do you have a death wish or something? I may be in a good mood now but that’s not gonna guarantee you a quick and painless death sooner or later. Whether you come with me or not”

“I want to know more about humans and why you are killing everypony. Please, I – I always felt like… like deep inside I’m really a human”

Deadpool facepalmed “I swear, this universe is begging me to destroy it” 

“Ever since I was a little filly there are times that I just naturally move in a different way than… well, ponies. Back then I kind of like standing upright and-and even the way I sit and hold things I – even now I – ugh… It’s hard to explain”

She walked towards him and held his scab-ridden hand “And these… they’re called Hands, right? They’re… They’re amazing…”

“Awkwaaard” He took his hand and a step back “You are fucking creepy”

She immediately lunged to his leg along with a ‘woosh’ sound and cartoon dust particles “Please! This is my chance to know more about myself! I risked my life coming to this part of the forest – I left my all friends back home without even saying a word to them – I need to come with you!”

He tried to shake her away from his leg but she just kept clinging while a generic cartoon bell rang along. You know, the sound that plays when you’re trying to shake off something in a cartoon? Because he’s in a cartoon?

She gave him the puppy dog eyes when he stopped shaking her off. Little stars twinkled in those unbelievably huge eyes along with an overdone pout thrown in with a few whimpers for good measure. Just a second ago this thing was scared to death and now she looks like she wants a Scooby snack.

“You’re Insane” but it made him think. This could work. He can’t help but rub his chin and look like he’s thinking real hard in front of her. Yes, this could work. “… You know what? I think I like you”

“THANK YOU!” Her overblown pout morphed into an overblown smile, and started to celebrate by spinning around in front of him while laughing and jumping “THANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOUTHANKYOU – OH THANK YOUU!!” he’s pretty sure she’s dancing or something. Yeah, this must be how horses dance.

For some reason, she reminds him of Pinkie Pie.

“Right…” while Lyra kept fucking around he looked for any sign of her even though he’s sure there won’t be “Well, like I said. Where am I going?”

“I’m sorry, did you say some-”

A looming shadow covered the entire sky and embraced the forest. It enveloped her senses leaving her blind and deaf. She screamed but she couldn’t hear herself screaming. She moved her hooves but she couldn’t feel the ground. Then as soon as it came, the looming shadow vanished and she found herself with him in a different place.

A very different place.

“WAAAH!! AAAHH!” She turned and found themselves stranded in a place with nothing but the barren red ground and the sickly horizon of nothing but strange red shapes moving in the pitch black background totally devoid of light “AAAHH!! AAAAAAHHH!!!! WHERE ARE WE?! AAHH! WHERE?!”

[[Hi there, new friend!]] 

“WHO SAID THAT?!” She turned to the human but he just smiled at her “WHO SAID THAT?!?!”

[[I did!]] 

She felt the voice coming from behind her - she in no way wanted to but her body turned by itself. Her heart feeling like its rising from her chest and all her fur standing straight up, she found herself staring into two fiery red dots at the end of two large voids. Her entire body froze. Her eyes felt like they were going to pop out from their sockets while the world around her looked like it was being sucked into the two voids she’s staring at. A black crescent shape appeared below and for a moment it felt like she was staring into a face

[[Hiiiiii♪♪]] 
> Chapter 9: Pinkie Pie Must Die
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------




"So... we meet again for the last and second time..." 

He paused and thought about what he said. He glanced back at her, looking for an acknowledgement of any kind that would mean he made sense.

The pale yellow mare stared at him with blank sunken eyes and mumbled with a voice as understandably confused if you were to say something to an introduction like that "Um... yes"

"Right. Yeah"

The beast stood a few paces from her door. Streaks of the moonlight revealed splotches of her otherworldly visitor, standing between her and the only door in Rarity’s room

"Why are you doing this?"

Dead eyes locked to sunken ones. The wind blew harshly against the trees outside. The damp air rushed in from the window behind her. He scoffed a little, taken by her sudden display of fortitude.

"Because... I'm the hero the multiverse deserves"

"What?"

"It needs me. The multiverse needs me. To be its abolitionist"

Her brows met, trying to understand the metaphor "... A-Abo-bo.. Abolitionist?"

He stepped forward. The sound of his footsteps crashing like waves in the ocean. He stopped, towering an arm's reach in front of her, far enough to grab and break her neck then and there.

"Let me drop a little anecdote to you. You and I are slaves. Slaves to corporations. Pimped to live in an endless cycle of pain, death, fan service and whored-out writers for the sake of money and continuity"

He bent down to her, their faces only a palm away from each other "Do you know how it feels like to die and be resurrected over and over again? ... Maybe you don't because you're probably not some comic book character whose popularity is plummeting and has a writer who has to think of some bullshit story to make your book boost sales... I think we all felt that, but I'm the only one that knows"

Almost unseen, he unsheathed a sword from his back and brought the blade to her neck - yet she did not flinch nor did she blink. A face undaunted stared him back. A muzzle that smelled decay a hundredfold. Eyes beheld death a thousand fold. A heart shattered too many times.

"Don't be sad kid. I'm here to break that cycle for everyone, don't you see? I'm here to save you all. What's your single death to a million of your lives living in limbo?"

He pushed down his blade on her neck but not enough to cut her skin against the dull edge of the blade "So I hunt, because I can do it. I'm not your hero. I'm your loudmouth guardian. Your chimichanga protector. May I say... A Dark Knight"

She stood there for a moment, studying his gaze. Thought for a moment if what they said about seeing through someone’s eyes was true – if she could somehow see into this monster’s soul through his eyes - If it has one.

“Yeah I know. That would have been a little better had I said it back in 2013. But you fit what you can in a story knowing how long this has been going on, right?”









Chapter 9: Pinkie Pie Must Die



Cold dead air breezed over her coat. The floor she laid down on shook, as if it was gaining momentum with her heartbeat - constantly arising along the deep resounding tremors. Her eyes awake but their lids kept shut, glued to their sockets resisting the glowing viridian spread out in her vision.

[[Sh... be q...]]

She tried to focus the thoughts wandering the abyss of her mind. Voices new yet strangely familiar compels her eyes to greet the dawn. Her eyelids flutter about, opening like a door to forbidden worlds. The stagnant air fills her senses, the smell like a strange mix of brimstone and coal leaving a burnt sensation to her tongue. 

"..Ghc..! ..ckk--"

Her mind was not clouded enough to ignore the irritation on her muzzle. She twitched but It continued like ants piercing her flesh by each leg as it gnaw inside her nostrils.

"AHH--!"

By reflex, her right hoof immediately lunged and swatted and her muzzle. The irritation was soon replaced by a burning sensation going inside her eyes and nasal cavity.

"AHH! AAAAHH!" her eyes shot up as she flail her hooves about her face, trying to remove the smog filling up the insides of her face 

"AAAAAAAHHHH!"

[[BAHAHAHAHA!]] 

"AAHAHAHAHA!"

Tears fill up her eyes as the stinging continues. As she struggle against the pain, the human she met earlier and a pony were on the floor laughing at her. She screams for help, but all she gets is a hoof and a finger pointing at her.

"AHH! HEEELP! HELP!"

[[AAAHHAHAH!]]  

"AHAHA! OH MY GOD - BWAHAHA!"

She fought back her tears but the pain lingered. She wished for a thought she had claws to rip her face so that the burning inside would stop.

[[AAHAHAHAHA!]]   

"WAHAHA! HOLY SHIT HAHAHA!"

Things happening too fast for her to think about, all the pain left as soon as it came. Her vision distorted by her own tears, she looked up to the two people who were still laughing at her. Gasping for air, she tried to get answers

"WHAT... What.. WHAT HAPPENED?!"

The two were finally calming down. The human reached for breaths between suppressing giggles while the other mare who suspiciously looks and acts like Pinkie Pie kept snorting like a pig.

"AHH-AHH... okay -- AHAHA!... okay... okay--"

He took another deep breath "--okay!... okay..."

"...."

[[....]]   

"...."

[[....]]   

"AAAHHHAHAHAHA!"

[[HAHAHAA--AAAHAHA!]]   

She rubbed her eyes a bit more until she was sure she could finally see clearly. She waited for a few moments for them to tire out from laughing. She finally approached them, wary of any tricks.

“No, seriously, what did you do? Did you do some sort of magic on me while I was out…?”

“Magic? No no no, just some good old Pumpkin Spice” Deadpool held a jar to her and threw it away “It was funny while it lasted that one week at most, two years ago. This part was a bit behind so I apologize for that. Won’t happen again maybe, but who am I to keep promises at this point?”

He shrugged. The things you do to occupy time it seems “I don’t know why, but I like you Lyra. With all the crazy shit that’s been happening, I think you’re crazy enough that I could actually trust you… on some levels”

[[But don't trust crazy all the way because that's crazy and you're crazy - But trust crazy enough because if you can't trust crazy, what can you trust? ]]  The mare also shrugged her shoulders. 

“Thanks” As she stood up he immediately pulled her close

“Can you see it? It’d be just like my Team-up days! Me going on wacky adventures with some other characters whose comics don’t sell as good as mine, killing people and taking names. The good old post-Cable and Deadpool days, I say! Truly I was - and am an inspiration to us all.”

At this point in writing, the current My Little Pony comics have sold more copies than the entire Deadpool collection dating back to 1991.

“Is that what humans do?”

“They sure do my light blue companion!  Human beings are capable of evil deeds indeed”

“Yeah… I kinda sniffed that out” also her coat is teal.

Deadpool held her face close to him. You know technically horses have their eyes at the side of their heads and you see it when you face them up front but these ponies when you look at them that way their eyes looks like their place right in front instead of the sides? It might be the creepiest thing with this show, he thought of himself “You have a good nose young padawan, but is your heart set and your mind ready? The road to being human is fraught with many trials and hardships. You will learn to harden your heart and betray those close to your heart. Like every human you will experience your first heartbreak, always ever thinking about what could have been, constantly screaming as you recount every vivid detail of the embarrassment that day and all the mixed emotions you’ll moved on with over until you get over  the age of 52 or something”

He continued “You will eventually settle with a job you’d like at first but after two months you couldn’t hate more, taking orders from over-privileged idiots cursing at you for not knowing what they don’t know either which they could have figured out by looking at a manual or going to the internet but you couldn’t because of your rushed training process and forced to learn most things on the job which will do real shit to your customer satisfaction metric”

He gave her 3 whole seconds to pull that in, and then wonder briefly what exactly did he said back there. Then he laid it all flat to her “Are you so willing to give up your life fluttering about in the woods, occasionally grazing on grass while listening to some Bob Marley tunes or whatever ponies really do for a life laden with heartaches, blood, despair, hopelessness, and death just to be with your inner nature?”

“Uhh…” She gotta admit, that made her think about all this wanting to be human thing.

He added before she made up her mind “I’m not saying it’s not a good path. And I’m also not saying that you know too much by now to let you go just like that. And I’m also not insinuating in any way that if you don’t agree I can just kill you right here to make up for the trouble having Pinkie Pie bring us both here”

[[Not that a killing today would be any more trouble that is]]  

She made up her mind, she wanted to prove to these people she was determined to see this through “Listen to me. I left all my friends back in Ponyville for a murderer who killed half of them and most of the population of Canterlot, and in the middle of the Everfree forest - I almost got killed by a manticore in the process just so I can figure out more about myself. You have NO IDEA how important this all really is to me. Yes I want to be like you. I’ve sacrificed so much already and I’m not giving up now - even... If it had to come to more than this... Also, we don’t graze on grass”

“R-Right. Sorry, last time I gave that speech was to a cow. I fought a cow once, you know? Did I ever mention that to you?”

“… No, I don’t believe so…?”

“Right. Pinkie can you scare the shit out of her?”

“No wait—“








Simply to admit it scares her but she does not know what terrifies her the most - what happened in Canterlot or how could this affect Discord. She have no idea how where she summoned such fortitude to wait him out for this long but she sat there, unmoving, waiting for a snide remark at the very least but there was only silence. She would wait him out all year if she could but with Luna out of the way someone has to move the sun and the moon.

She stood up, her eyes still fixed on the column sprayed with his blood. Its every pattern and detail etched in her mind; streaks of Discords' fluids moving every angle away from the debris, a crude message which appears to be almost hastily written using the pool of blood leaking from the column it is on - an image like this would haunt anypony else for the rest knowing what she knows and what must have happened. 

"Deadpool was here"

A symbol. Its meaning escapes her but she has stared long enough that it has been ingrained in her memory, A circle with a straight-through vertical line parting it in the middle, a dot on the center of each half. Perhaps it has no meaning, for what meaning is there to be had from what happened?

"It is time to bring down the sun"

"Yes it is, dear Celestia"

She raised her head, the sound of his voice coming from every side of the hall. She heaved a slight sigh of relief but she could feel her heart beating

"What have you been thinking about, Discord?" her voiced lingered in the hall for a moment before she continued "How do you feel?"

She could feel the silence ringing in her ears. The sound of his deep sigh rumbled the hall

"I feeel... Just fiiiine...." 

His tired voice trailed off. Celestia's eyes centered back on the fallen column over his body "Please come and speak to me, Discord"

"Oh, but I am speaking to you" his suddenly had a jolt in his manner "Here I am now... speaking... to you, my dear..."

"What is this Deadpool, Discord?"

There was silence again

"Did it kill you?"

Silence again but it did not last long "That would... depend on the context, I think"

Her eyes stared away at every corner of the main hall, the pool of blood on the floor still dripping away from the orifices of his mangled body crushed from the platform. The debris chipped from the walls around them, blood splattered from one side and the other

"I for one am very much alive but this whole sordid experience has got me to think real deep... I must admit I didn't expect to be taken out so easily. In all my years I've never really seen this kind of tenacity... guess you really never stop learning even for immortal deities such as ourselves, no?"

"How did it do it?"

"Does it matter? It won't be happening again I assure you."

"I want to know for once what we are dealing with here. This sort of... tenacity I must say brings a shock I surely share with you"

"Exactly! - I've never seen anything like this, You've never seen anything like this - Who HAS? Coming to the point I want to make, this Deadpool - HE is not from our world... from both sides of the equation. Figuratively and Literally"

"I suspected as much" She closed her eyes to think for a moment "Why is he doing this? Do you know?"

"He did not say"

It annoyed her to hear that. All this time waiting for him to talk and still there isn't any lead to all of this

"He is not working alone though." Celestia almost jumped at his response "I have seen it myself"

She turned everywhere in the room "Who? Who is Deadpool working with?"

He paused for a moment, not sure if her royal highness could take it. But he imagined for all that's happened lately, she's taking it very well. His sighed echoed the hall "You won't believe me when I tell you..."

"With what I've seen this Deadpool can do, I would believe anything"

She swore she heard Discord sigh deeply again everywhere in the Throne room. "Please do not delay this any further"

"Pinkie Pie"

"What?"

"It's Pinkie Pie, Celestia. She's working with Deadpool"

The princess stepped forward, trying to connect everything with what she heard "Pinkie Pie?"

"Yes"

"... I see"

She turned towards the broken double doors "Thank you for your help Discord. I have to raise the moon now"

"Also princess, if you don't mind I'd like to sit this one out. I need some time to be dead"

She continued her way out "If you wish. Discord, I'd like to ask a favor from you"

"Yes your highness?"

"Do not die a second time"

"As you wish... What about Pinkie Pie?"

"Pinkie Pie must die"





"Are you really Pinkie Pie?"

[[Sure am!]]    The smile on Pinkie's face didn't do much to make her look less otherworldly. The small glowing orbs inside her eye-holes felt like it was boring itself through her soul

"But... why do you look like that?"

[[I dunno. Why do you think you're secretly a human, Lyra?]]   

She stepped back and murmured to herself "... Okay... uh... I don't... know..."

Deadpool chimed in "She said she likes to move funny or something like that. You wouldn't think just by looking at her now but she's a REAL nutcase when I met her earlier"

[[Haha! Still, Wade thinks you're okay so you're okay in my book!]]   

"Wade? Is that his name?"

"Yep. You can call me Deadpool. The Merc with the mouth" he wrapped his arm around her "I'm definitely not the best guy to teach you about being human but I'll teach you alright"

The words barely came from her mouth "Thank you"

"Aww, don't thank me! After all, you'll have to earn your keep. I may have sent everyone packing intent towards the other side of the planet maybe but I know the one thing that can put me out once and for all..."

She waited for him to continue but the look he's giving is that he's waiting for her to figure it out. Then she realized without thinking "The Elements of Harmony"

"Ding Ding Ding! And so comes the Million dollar question..."

Oh no. What have you gotten yourself into, Lyra "... What do you want me to do?"

"Not that question yet -  THE million dollar question IS..."

"Can you kill Pinkie Pie?"
> Chapter 10: Et Splendor Lunae
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------




"... but... how do you... how do you know this?"

"... I just DO. I already told you - I'm NOT THE BAD GUY!!"

The glint of light beaming from the metal sheet bounced about, bending the moonlight rays of that cold uneasy evening. Deadpool hid the sword from her, nowhere in sight save for the mark it left brazenly on her neck - Her yellow fur folding lightly against the crease marked by the edge of his blade.

"I'm not fishing for anyone's sympathy here - I know I'm a psychopath or whatever but that doesn't mean I'm not doing the right thing! You all just don't know how bad we all have it... if you did you would all be thanking me"

{{All your life no one thanked you. You've always been that unknown hero. It's never fair, isn't it?}}

The monster stood up, turning away from her gaze "Even YOU would know for a fact that I'm doing the right thing. If you were in my shoes, you'd do exactly the same thing! You just don't see it now, but you will... once you spend your waking life knowing what I do, you will"

"Killing is never the right thing..."

He took a sharp turn back to her. The utter disgust glaring straight into those hopelessly delirious, naive eyes. He's seen them before all too often - the kind that people cling to when they smell their death coming. These aren't eyes of survivors. These are eyes of sheep.

"When you see someone dying and he can't do anything about it... like, a guy bleeding to his death on the floor and there's no way to save him - wouldn't the RIGHT thing to do is to put him out of his misery? What would you do? Scream for help? Pray to god? You'd rather let him bleed out than do the dirty work for yourself, right? No. You wouldn't stop his misery because you would be killing him. You selfish bastard. You're more concerned about keeping your hands clean than stepping up from the crowd and ending his misery. You're the kind that sees an accident but waits for somebody else to act, that's all you are - a crowd looking at a car crash but too stiff to move, waiting for somebody else to be the hero"

Silence.

"I stood at the sidelines for so long... not anymore. Kid, I'm done sitting my ass off this shitstorm we're in. I didn't think I had the chops to do what needs to be done until eventually I just single-handedly wiped off the Avengers, the X-men... then Conan the Barbarian, Mulan, to fucking Sherlock Holmes! Shit, It's sounds too easy when I say it like that... then again, I guess I'm a product of what I hate so much."

"But... we're not dying, Deadpool"

Complete silence. The air itself hung cold in anticipation. Irises so black as if light itself escapes his field of vision stare through her very core.

Restlessly, the trees outside clash with their own against the wind. The evening crickets themselves participating in otherworldly silence. In that solitary room, the very which she shared with the demon standing at her reach, she stood.

Towering. Unwavering.

The greatest irony of all this... to gaining great courage, she first gained great fear.

In the back of his mind, briefly Deadpool wondered. For Fluttershy, what else is there for her to lose?

"... we're living. We're not dying, we're living"

















Chapter 10: Et Splendor Lunae









The moon glows high above, peering over the vast metropolis of the Crystal Empire. The reflection bounding from each surface of the city brings a mesmerizing sight of light - glittering through its inner workings and corridors contrasting the evening darkness. It takes away her breath.

The night is beautiful.

On the balcony stands Princess Luna alone in her thoughts. Her gaze fixed on the details of the silver moon peering from the sky. The contours of its dusty exterior shining over the city give her a feeling of calm, and strangely nostalgia.

The moon is beautiful.

Its beauty illuminating over its blemishes, hiding them away from the prying eyes of the earth. She feel the somber silence spread from the crystal city, carrying with it an elated moment of clarity.

Her gaze lingered on the majesty before her as hoofsteps clanking with a paced purpose reverb within the hall. A voice, soft and trembling with caution offset the calm the evening gaze provides her.

"Your highness..."

As his voice seemingly trail off, the princess interrupt his sudden silence "Good evening, Shining Armor. How fare the guards of the news?"

He had a pause of choosing his words "Not... very well, your majesty. But they will be ready if it decides to attack. I've personally made sure the guards know what to expect"

Luna had a slight glare at this show of bravado. It impacted her the wrong way "No. You will not be ready. Surprise is the fiend's favored weapon and it uses it keenly. We will not know when it will strike again"

The captain bows low with an extreme hesitance to pursue the issue further, yet "Your majesty... What happened in Canterlot?"

Memories of the mangled bodies of ponies strewn about flooded her thoughts. The royal guards cut like knife through butter, a path of blood making their way to the throne, a body crushed by a fallen pillar, a message written in blood.

She snaps herself back to reality and make her gait inside the castle "According to everypony that have seen it - a strange creature single-handedly razed Canterlot to the ground"

The stallion follows her, quickening his pace as she does "How did it destroy everything? Wh-What did it look like? Princess?"

"I did not see it for myself" she take care not to pound the floor in frustration "Discord is dead"

Shining's eyes widen as she interrupts his moment of revelation "If it comes, NO ONE is safe. You must NOT fight. Leave. Save as many ponies as you can. Lead them away from the city as quick as you can, captain"

He turns to study her blank expression as they walk. He thinks to himself how strong the princesses must really be to keep a straight face in a crisis like this "So there is no way to fight it then?"

"That is why we are here. To find out how we can... Twilight?"

They meet Twilight Sparkle in escort with a unicorn of brilliant amber coat, a fiery mane of vivid crimson and yellow stripes, and piercing cyan pupils evidently studying her own appearance in return.

"And you must be Sunset Shimmer"

She curtsies to her "A pleasure to meet you, Princess Luna"

"The pleasure is mine" she turns to Twilight "She is here to help us?"

“Yes, she has some ideas – and she thinks it would help if she sees the monster herself”

"What? Preposterous. That is too risky"

The amber unicorn steps in "Um. I don't have to" she giggled to herself "If it’s alright, I’d like to see for myself what exactly happened. In Canterlot.”

Luna read Twilight's expression for a moment then snap her attention back to Sunset "I am sorry but I am not sure that would be wise. I do not believe that the bodies have even been buried yet. Everything happened just this afternoon"

Sunset turned to Twilight "Maybe we should ask Princess Celestia instead"

"Perhaps you should, but not this evening" she scoffed at this insolence, perhaps too audibly "You must rest for the night and we will continue this in the morrow" She pause and turns to meet all their faces "Forgive me, I must be alone. Captain, I leave them to you. Be ever vigilant"

He nods as the princess turn her back from them, making her way to the foyer. As her lonely figure shrink from their vision, Shining can't help but feel the cold of the air itself tug at the bottom of his chest.

He spies upon the fiery eyes of his younger sister, Twilight Sparkle, looking upon her guest with a renewed sense of disdain and, as it almost appear to him, inexplicable malice. Lest the fires of Tartarus consume her companion, he steps forward "Well, uh... I’ll uh... uh - I'll get you girls a room. Follow me, this way”

After walking past between them, he takes the lead them towards the room reserved for them by Princess Cadence. While he knows it is terribly bad manners to eavesdrop on the young mares, he can't help but pry into the whispers hushing about behind...



"What's wrong with you? Why did you say that?"

"What do you mean?"

"You know exactl--! Asking for Princess Celestia instead?"

"Well, what's wrong with that? If Princess Luna won't help us..."

"How could you say such a thing to the princess? After what we've just been into-"

"Look Twilight. You know the situation we're into, right? We have a monster out there that just destroyed Canterlot and it's loose. There are more important things to worry about than being polite to princesses that won't help"

"Sunset! ... A-Are you listening to yourself?!"



"SO uh, girls!" he interrupts, pointing to the purple alabaster double doors across them "Cadence had this prepared for you. One room, like you said little sis. So... sleep tight tonight, alright? We've got... long days... ahead of us"

A tired chuckle is all she could muster.

"Thanks big bro. You sleep tight too"

He bows in acknowledgement to her and her guest "Sunset."

The mare in the fiery mane returns the gesture as he walk away, taking in the echoes of his hoofsteps clanking in that dead of night.

"So... your brother huh? ...Is he single?"

"... He's married. To Princess Cadence"

"Oh! ...oh."

"Come on, let's sleep for now. Shining is right, we have long days ahead of us"

“Long days, huh?”

Twilight helps herself in the room as the mare in the fiery mane take one more glance at the receding figure of the new princess’ brother. 

“Wish I could say it’s good to be back”





“How long do you reckon before Twilight comes back, sis?”

Her little sister snuggling with the covers next to her “Not long sugarcube. Don’t you worry none - If I know Twilight, she’d figure all this out soon” 

She felt her mane, caressing Applebloom’s delicate forehead“ Why, I bet Twilight has figured something out right now. Everything will be alright, sweetpea”

She lets out a weak chuckle, a small comfort for her and the little one.

Applejack’s deep green eyes stare back, the moonlight from the window embracing her older sister’s figure like a crown.  Entranced for only an instant, she retreats back into her hooves. The thoughts of her family still lingering in her idle mind, she bursts “I really miss Big Mac and Granny Smith”

“I miss them too Applebloom” her eyes cast downward at the thought “I miss them too…”

The creaking of the door opening echo about the room. They turn. A small figure embossed by the shadows slowly reached out from the crevice. 

The light peeking from the windowsill reflects back from its eyes in muted surprise “Oh! You guys are awake… sorry” 

“Spike…” she lets go of her breath “It’s alright” she glances to little filly nuzzling her with an assured smile “We’re both having trouble sleeping anyway”

He takes a few steps forward into the dim light, head down and claws fiddling for a bit “You uh.. can I get you guys something? We have some apples downstairs, I can go ahe—“ his eyes widen at the realization ”Oh! Oh, I’m sorry. I-I’m not—I’m really sorry, I’m not thinking right..“

“It’s alright Spike. It’s alright” she betrays a tired sense of surrender “Don’t fret none... each of us is in shock right now, so… it’s alright”

By habit he fiddled his claws, dreading the awkward silence. An idea pops up and he suddenly lights up “Oh! I think we have some cake downstairs. I’ll get you guys some! I’ll be right back!”

Before she could say a word, Spike made a beeline downstairs faster than you can say “wait”. 

She smiled to herself and then turns to Applebloom “Spike sure is sweet ain’t he?”

Applebloom nods “It sure was nice of Twilight to let us stay here…” she trailed off, seemingly lost in her thoughts “Big sis, are we going to move to one them other farms? At the funeral, Apple Fritter told me we should move in with ‘em”

“Jonagold told me the same thing”

Applejack studied her face for a while, wondering for a moment if she should ask “Do you want us to move in with them?”

The filly looks down in indecision “I don’t know”

She looks back up, waiting for what Applejack would say. The older sister for her part already had an answer in mind “Well, I guess it makes sense to help with the farm. We’re Apples after all and we stick together”

“Does that mean we’re leaving Ponyville?”

Her gaze still fixed on Applebloom, she wrestles in her mind what to say

“I…”

Leaving means going far away from the rest of their friends - probably for life. They can still find work in Ponyville but what are Apples without working with apples? This is a family tradition for a reason.

The choice is obvious, but it ain’t an easy one.

“What’ll we do, big sis?”

She cradled her tighter as if to stop her from leaving. Unconsciously, her hoof caressed the little filly’s mane delicately “I’ll figure it out, sugarcube. Don’t you worry”

The creaking of the bedroom door was sudden like a slam, knocking them out of their reverie. Spike came back carrying two plates, each with a slice of cake balancing on each of his claws “Here you go guys - cake for a midnight snack! Not bad right?” With practiced elegance he placed them on the bed next to their lying figures “Here you go! Go on, it’s great!”

“Thank you Spike” 

AJ murmured as she pushed back the covers of the bed. Her gaze turning to the slice lying delectably on the plate – two yellow sponges joined together by a thin layer of chocolate on top another lined with whipped cream and topped with a single cherry. 

“This looks really good Spike!” Applebloom took her plate first, the excitement fully obvious on her eyes and lips “Thanks!”

“You’re welcome! We have more downstairs - I can get more if you want”

“No, that’s fine” Applejack also had to contain her excitement “Thank you very much though”

She took a small bite with her spoon – she was right. “What in tarnation…” It’s absolutely delicious. 

“Spike, this cake is delicious. Who made this?”

“Huh?” He stood dumbfounded for a moment. When he finally understood the question, he turned away in embarrassment “umm… I did, actually”

“What?!” Applebloom almost stood in astonishment “Spike this is amazing! I didn’t know you could bake this good!”

“Ahaha… well, it was hard at first. I wasn’t really good at baking but there were actually good books in the library for baking. I was surprised actually, I thought all the books are the boring stuff” He scratched the back of his head, trying his embarrassment. He wasn’t used to this sort of attention

He sat on the bed and swayed his legs for a moment, thinking of something to say

“You know, she isn’t here but I’m sure that... even if you didn’t ask her – Twilight would love to have you both stay here as long as you want” he paused, thinking of more to say “or even live here, you know! I’m sure Twilight would love that… now that she’s a princess, I’m sure there are a lot of things she’d need help for – I mean, I take care of enough paperwork as it is! Haha… anyway… just… saying what’s on my mind”

He rubbed the back of his head, thinking of something to say. He turned and saw the both of them staring at him with a look of total surprise

“What? Did I say something stupid again? I’m sorry, I don’t know what to say right now”

“No Spike… You didn’t say something stupid… Thank you”

He still didn’t understand but he returned the beaming smile she’s giving “Y-You’re welcome! … Twilight will figure things out, I’m sure of it!” 

They ate for a while, taking in the peace Spike afforded them. The clanking of the plates, and the smiles on the mares faces were enough to make him feel better. For a while, there were no need for words.

When they were done he jumped off the bed “I guess I should leave you guys alone now… goodnight”

“Goodnight Spike, Thanks again”

In practiced motion he took the plates with him as he gently closed the door behind him, making his way to the kitchen. Without a thought, he starts washing the dishes until he hears someone knocking at the front door.

“Huh? Who could that be?”

He dries off his claws with a towel then starts towards the door. 

“It’s like midnight” He whispers as he grip and turn the handle open to the sight of their visitor. 

The moonlight hid her features for a moment but he recognize that silhouette anywhere – her flowing mane, elegant piercing eyes, that beautiful white coat, and those diamond cutie marks.

“Rarity? W-What brings you hear so late?”

He can feel the warmth radiating from her graceful smile “I’m doing good, Spike... How are Applejack and Applebloom?” 

Just the sight of her vivid deep azure eyes gleaming of the stars of that moonlit night takes him aback, stunning him in his place.

“Spike?”

“Oh! Th-They’re asleep I think…”

“Oh… Yes, of course… I mean, may I come in?”

“O-Of course!” he holds open the door “Come in, come in, I’ll take you inside”

She follows the lead of the spritely young gentledragon before her. They ascend the stairs making their way to the second room floor, then onto a solitary oakwood door slightly ajar peering a glimpse of two mares – one adult, one child – snuggling together under the white sheets of the bed.

She beheld the two sisters sleeping soundly in their embrace as Spike opened their bedroom door. The moonlight clothes them like an infant’s blanket, peacefully and delicately still. She smiles and takes in this small respite. 

‘At least some of my friends, even for a moment, are at ease’

Her gaze lingers on until she started to become conscious of Spike studying her expression. She motions him to close the door and they begin to leave.

“Sorry Rarity, we were just talking earlier, I guess they were really tired”

“That’s quite alright, dear” They continue to go downstairs, keeping their steps as silent as they can “I just wanted to see if how they are faring”

The scales on the little dragon’s face appear harder somehow to her. His green eyes stared back at her, perhaps studying the lines forming up below her own tired eyes.

“How about you, Spike? How are you faring these past few days?”

“Huh?” He stares back and scratches his head for a bit “Uhh… good, I… I guess…”

She remains quiet to give him the opportunity which he seizes “Well, not really to be honest but I’m not the one who lost their family and friends so I don’t think I should feel so bad”

He looks at the confusion in her eyes and corrected “Oh I mean – It’s not that I should be happy because this happened, of course not! I just feel like I shouldn’t be so sad because… you know, I – I should… feel lucky to be alive or – or be happy that Twilight or… or my friends aren’t hurt – I mean...”

“… I…”

He keeps silent, grasping for the right words to say in his mind. The silence was short but tense.

“It’s alright to feel sad for your friends, Spike” Rarity grasped his shoulder “I feel sad too”

“I just think we should be strong for them”

She takes her gaze away from him and to nothing in particular “I think we should be there for them”

“… That too” 

He looked at her for a moment, curious on the thoughts she must have staring blankly at nowhere “Do you want to stay for a slice of cheesecake?”

“No, I’m sorry. I have to get the store ready for tomorrow”

The swift delivery really stung for some reason.

“… really?”

She smiles a bit at his response “Yes. As bad as things are, work is going to help keep the bad taste of the past few days from the mouth... do you have library duty tomorrow?”

“Twilight just told me to keep them company but… now that you mentioned it, I guess I’ll take care of the library too. Yeah, I think taking care of the place while Twilight is gone is going to help keep my mind off things”

“That’s right Spike. We take care of our friends best when we take care of ourselves first”

She reach out and embraces him. His heart skips a beat and for a while he tried not to breath too much of her scent. For what seemed like forever, she finally let go of him and gave him a beaming smile only Rarity could pull off 

“You have a good night’s sleep now, okay? Take care of yourself, Spike”

He stands there outside the library with the moon at his back for a while, staring at her retreating figure. He keeps both claws to his chest because he feels like it would leap out from his chest if it didn’t stop.

“Calm down Spike, it was just a hug. She didn’t mean anything else by it”

He breathed in and breathed out until he could stop feeling the permeating drumroll in his chest, and then he felt it.

That moment, that feeling that he wants to say something to her, but he can’t wrap it in his head what. 

He looks around but she’s no longer around.





“Two death battles, another reboot, two movies starring a short terminator, an ethnically diverse really lucky girl, and the guy who played green lantern and we’re still, really. Really. REALLY doing this?”

Deadpool stood up from the reddish bedrock he was laying down on. The air is heavy and he could feel his throat retch at the strange dampness of the air. He turned around to the blank horizon which seem to stretch infinitely with absolutely nothing in sight but the bedrock floor and swirling shapes in dark red sky.

Pinkie Pie’s domain. Or whatever. Technically she’s not the real Pinkie Pie of this particular universe but some alternate creepier and killier version of her, born in some delectable creamy pasta dish from what Deadpool understands. It’s pretty fucking weird, that’s for sure. You know it’s kinda confusing to call her Pinkie Pie when there’s also another Pinkie Pie, right? We’ll just call her Creamypasta Pie from now on. Because 10 chapters in this thing, a third introduction to everyone is exactly what everybody needs, right?

{{This is the reason why we do what we do}} the ominous voice within him speaks {{Stop the literary limbo we and many like us face}}

“We’re literally telling everyone what happened because it’s been two years since the last chapter. I just hope we finish what we started. Is there even a point to all this? It’s like the more I do, the less I accomplish in the grand scheme of things. What are we trying to do again?”

Detecting the very subtle nod to remind our readers what’s happening, Creamypasta Pie raised her hoof [[Ooh! Ooh! To destroy the elements of harmony?]] 

“Erm... Yeah. I think. Is that what we were trying to do?”

{{Destroying the ideaverse has been our main goal for some time.}} With a deep tremble in the back of his mind, Deadpool could feel the Ominous voice (Who we will name Red Caption) resound within his head {{We’ve accomplished many feats until we came to this pony universe. Pinkie Pie has been helping us take out the notable characters that build the story of this universe – stop the circus and let us freaks finally rest}}

“Right, right, sorry. It’s just been so long and so many things happened I’m personally having trouble catching up”

[[We’ve made some progress but it’s not nearly enough – especially as we haven’t really killed anyone important yet]]

“W-What?! We leveled an entire city, a castle, and killed a magic dragon! You cannot be serious”

[[You mean Discord? He’s still alive]]

“WHAT?!”

[[So is the rest of the main cast, actually. Nobody is actually dead yet. You could say Zecora is, but really everyone knows she was the first to go because it’s hard to write rhymes]]

I bet you’re enjoying the story, huh?

“How hard is it to write rhymes?  It’s not hard to sound sublime. Go say whatever’s on your mind, go look up what the word sounds like. Mumble the words like you’re taking a crapper, boom, you sound like a modern rapper”

[[… that… was horrible]]

“Whatever! Haters gonna hate, it’s a fact since forever. Just because of that, I’ll rap till I’m tired!”

Deadpool then moved his hands like he’s scratching some turntable and started flicking them like some generic rapper



“Uhh, 
Menacing methods label me a lethal weapon
Making ponies die, witnessin’ reckless damn aggression
Can you picture my specific plan?
No you can’t because this story’s been going on for like 6 years, man.
Uhh
It all started when Mister Cullen Bunn
Thought it was funny if I started killing everyone
They all died in the end, but in the end there’s more
It turns out I also have to kill the literature universe!
Me? 
A born killer, never leave the block without my heater
Now I’m killing ponies for some reason in this fan fiction
How the fuck did I sank so low
Shit, I got two movies but here I am killing animals in some kiddie show
How can I show you how I feel inside?
Six years but still not finished! Am I being taken for a ride?
Can we please just get this over with? ‘Cause this is just wrong
There’s writer’s block and being lazy but there’s also being a shitty writer and not finishing what he started. Let it be known that it’s troublesome.
…”



Everyone is quiet for a few seconds until Creamypasta Pie started to say something 

[[ … Well. That was… ]]

She cleared her throat.

[[ A rip-off ]]

“Don’t be like that. Imitation is the highest form of flattery, so they say. Deathstroke for instance.”

He cleared his throat for a moment “Hey, do I have to kill 2Pac too?”

She scoffed a bit at him [[ What are you, crazy? He’s dead ]]

“First of all, yes. Second, that’s the popular opinion but nobody really knows now, do they?”

He sat down on the cold bedrock, his arms wrapped on his knees as he stare at hallucinating shapes on the horizon. This is a really freaky place. Can’t believe he’s actually getting the hang of it.

“Speaking of crazy how’s Lyra’s doing now?”

[[Let’s find out!]] 

She drags her crystal ball from off-screen and waves her hooves around it like some kind of lunatic [[Mirror mirror on the wall, show that pony in this ball!]]

The haze inside the glass disperse as it reveals Lyra Heartstrings smack dab in the middle of Ponyville in this time of night. She sneaks to seemingly nowhere in particular like some kind of burglar.

Deadpool crouched down towards the crystal ball on the floor “The way she’s sneaking, someone is going to mistake her for a thief. Not that it’s any worse than a would-be murderer.”

[[I still can’t believe she just agreed to kill her just like that. Do you think we could trust her, Wade?]]

He scratched his chin for a bit “Uh, sure we can. We can definitely trust the random crazy pony I brought with us to kill one of her friends with no real apparent motivation to do so”

He stood up and stretched his arms for a bit “Besides, what can she do? Warn everyone that I’ll kill them? Like they don’t know that already”

[[And if she tells them about me?]]

“Well… you’ll be fine, right? It’s not like you’re killable. What can possibly kill a teleporting magical demon horse?”

“Or me, for that matter”

…

Creamypie gave him a tight smile [[Oh my, what can indeed?]]

He smiled back to her “Maybe that street fighter dude earlier, maybe he could’ve killed me. Or not. I actually regenerated now that I remember”

[[Well I don’t know about that either, but I think I know somepony who probably can]]





Even in the evening, you can tell the vanilla cookie roof, butter cream walls, and those cupcake spiral tower from afar. The asymmetrical structure, vibrant color palette, and the distinct icing lining the roof makes it stand out from anything in the town.

Sugarcube Corner. You’d be hard-pressed to find anything like it. What madness would it take to design a bakery to look like an actual dessert? 

Pinkie Pie madness, maybe?

Lyra pulls open the fuchsia wooden door and make her way inside. The counter is empty and there’s nopony attending the place, obviously. You’d think people would lock their doors this time with the killings and all.

She takes care to keep her steps silent so as to not wake anypony up through the stairs. Pacing carefully through the hallway, her eyes adjust to the darkness and she sees a door at the end of the hall. 

With her hoof on the on the door, she pushes it ever so slowly keeping the creaking of its hinges deathly silent. Lying on a bed, a lone mare with fluffy pink mane sleeps silently under her balloon print cover. Lyra inches towards her like a predator finding the right time to strike.

Finally within reach of Pinkie Pie she stops for but a moment, to study her still figure. Under the covers her chest is rising rhythmically. Her eyes closed blissfully serene and unaware of the lightless world around them.

Slowly her hooves reaches out to Pinkie’s vulnerable figure and place them on her chest.

“Pinkie” she whispers “Wake up”

Pinkie’s eyes dart up and look directly at hers, sparing the few seconds to understand what’s happening “… Lyra? W-What are you doing here?”

“I need to tell you something important” she backs away to give her room to sit up from her bed “I’m thinking you’re probably the only one that can stop all this madness”

“Why? What’s going on?”

“I went to the forest last night to try to find the monster that was killing everypony and…”

Lyra looked away from her as if she’s not ready to continue “and I found the monster”

Pinkie found herself leaning forwards Lyra, her attention now fully enraptured by her.

“It killed a Manticore and saved my life”

“That’s really dangerous, Lyra. Why did you do that?”

“… well… anyway, I met the monster, Pinkie, and he told me he’s here to kill everypony”

She let what Lyra said sink in for a few seconds before asking “Did he say why?”

Lyra looks away and rubs the back of her neck “No, sorry. He didn’t”

Pinkie places both hooves on her shoulder and turns it into a hug “It’s a good thing you’re safe, Lyra. That thing could’ve killed you”

After a short moment, Lyra asks “Pinkie… can the elements of harmony really kill him?”

Pinkie looks at those brilliant gamboge eyes, trying to decipher what she means behind that “I… don’t know about kill… but we can definitely stop it” She moves her hoof in a criss-cross motion across her chest “Pinkie swear”

“Yeah… and when you use your magic, you’ll turn him into good, right? Instead of evil?”

”Yeah, That’s what will happen! We’ll turn the monster good and… it’ll be friends with everypony”

“Can that really happen? Even with all the ponies it killed?”

“We have to try” so she says but she didn’t sound convincing to herself “B-besides, it saved you right? It’s probably not TOTALLY evil, m-maybe if we find out the reason why it thinks it needs to kill everypony we can understand it better and we can stop all of this and we’d be able to be friends with it”

“Like Fluttershy?”

“Huh?”

“You think Fluttershy would be able to be friends with him even though he killed her animals and Discord?”

“… um… Fluttershy has always been friendly towards animals, and she might give the monster a chance too”

“What about Applejack? Do you think she would want to be friends with him when he killed her family and destroyed their barn?”

“… Um…”

“What about everypony else who lost their friends and families back in Canterlot? Do think when you’ve made Deadpool non-evil, everypony won’t want to kill him?”

“Deadpool?”

The cold night breeze seemingly stood still in the room, as if out of tension between the two mares.

“… Is that the monster’s name? What else do you know about him?”

Lyra turned away from her gaze like a prisoner under interrogation “I don’t know anything else. He told me his name and said he’s going to kill everypony but that’s it”

“… are you sure?”

She tried to look directly into Pinkie’s eyes that stared back with a strange expression of worry mixed with distrust. Especially on her face “Pinkie, what if the monster killed one of the elements?”

“… HUH?” 

“Like, if one of the wielders of the elements die will you still be able to use the elements of harmony to banish or kill him or something? Can he kill you like the way he killed everypony else?”

“…Lyra, what exactly happened with you and the monster?”

Lyra shook her head “Nothing! Sorry… I just don’t want anypony else to die…” she starts to leave the room but stopped short “I’m sorry I came to your house without thinking”

“Wait, Lyra” Pinkie stepped down from her bed. “Thanks for telling me this. I really appreciate it.” 

For a while she could only stare back at her. She didn’t want to think it but it looks like Lyra knows a lot more than she’s letting on. Does she not trust her? Did she make friends with the monster? What exactly happened that made her visit in this time of night?

“Um… how’s Bon Bon and Roseluck?”

“… Bon Bon left for Manehattan and Roseluck is dead”

Lyra closed the door of the room behind her and left Sugarcube Corner. The immense guilt of doubting Lyra finally hit her when she didn’t even realize how lonely Lyra must be feeling. 

“I should do something to cheer her up… I know! I’ll throw a party – wait, nevermind”

Pinkie turned towards the basket on the far end of her room where her pet alligator, Gummy, lay sleeping. She pat his head, feeling a little less sad with him around.

“Things are really affecting everypony, huh? What should I do, Gummy?”

Her thoughts come back to Lyra, fidgety and asking weird questions. It’s so weird for her to visit so suddenly in the middle of sleeping time. She didn’t even figure out why.

“Do you think Lyra is hiding something, Gummy?”

She shook her head “No no! It’s not right having doubts towards a friend! Lyra is really lonely right now which is why she’s acting like that”

Pinkie nods to herself and goes back to bed “Goodnight Gummy. See ya in the morning”

She closed her eyes and try to sleep again. She tries not to think about it anymore, but something still bothered her about what Lyra said. Something about that monster’s name…





“Deadpool…”

She closed the parchment sent to her by her sister and with a flick of her magic, threw it into the flames of the fireplace of her quarters. 

With her magic, she levitated a blank parchment from her night table and dipped her quill into an inkwell as she writes her own thoughts for her sister.



Dear Sister,

I am writing in response to your letter where you share me your news. As you wish, I shall keep that matter private for now and we will continue to discuss it more in person.

I implore you to forgive me for what I am about to say. Despite what you believe is damning evidence, I do not believe acting against her to bring a swift resolution to this trial is our best option. While I know the reformation our mutual friend went through, we cannot truly trust his word as he is by nature a trickster and manipulator as I’m sure you would agree with me. 

I also see that you are of flaring temper right now. I too am shocked and enraged of the events of the last few days but know that this is exactly what hypothetically somepony could be counting on so that we may commit rash decisions and act towards a supposed agenda. I apologize for my distrust but I do not want you to forget that this friend was once our long-standing enemy who stood against the rightful order of things we believed in.

I wish you to remember what jealousy and anger have done to transform me into Nightmare Moon and that to stop her, you had to banish your dear sister to the moon. Inevitably, the night came when she had to return to Equestria and in turn banish you because you were willing to wait for the proper course of action to take place.

The Crystal Empire remains largely unaffected by the events back home. We are also fortunate as Twilight was able to bring your former pupil from the other side, ready to assist in our endeavor. She expresses her wish to see the tragedy that have happened back home and while I shared my refusal towards that notion, I will not stop them if they truly believe it will help us track this monster down.

The Elements of Harmony will stop this monster like it has always saved the day and how the wielders took me down and helped me feel worthy to call myself your sister again. 

We will be riding the morning train back to Canterlot to greet you soon. I look forward to continue our discourse by then.

Thank you for raising the moon in place of my duty. I hope you have a pleasant sleep this evening.

I remain your loving sister,
Luna



Her spell rolls up the parchment and with a burst of light, displaces it from the air to reappear in her sister’s quarters.

With that done, she prepares to sleep. Ready for the nightmares she herself must face.

Darkness blankets the world around her as her weight lift from the bed, levitating her in the void. 

A mass of stars twirl around and morphs into a swirling form of a massive alicorn, looking down on her helpless form.

The Tantabus. Because she wasn’t punished for what she done as Nightmare Moon, she was certain that she created this creature to torture herself to infect her dreams into nightmares as penance.

The form of the Tantabus reached down onto her. An otherworldly white smile appeared on its face.

“Tonight, your nightmare is not a dream”

She finds herself staring at the dark ceiling of her quarters, roused from her sleep. 

Drawn by some force she can’t explain, she step down from her bed and reach for the door onto the way out her quarters.

With hoof on the door, she push it open. 

Patches of moonlight peers from the hallway windows revealing a solitary creature standing at a long distance from her.

For a while they both stood silent, as if wondering what to do at the sight of one another. 

The creature talks first.

“You should really get guards that don’t sleep at night”

Its voice carries itself within the echoes of the crystal walls, amplified even more by the eerie silence of everywhere else.

“Deadpool.”

The figure seem to relax and look down on her as it cross its arms.

“The one and only. I’d like to say that you catch on real quick but it’s hard not to know who I am when I wrote my name and all for you to see”

It takes three steps towards her. The reverb echo about the crystal walls, sounding off like warning shots “Now I know you have a lot of questions and all but I’m not really in the mood to answer them all for someone who’s about to die real quick”

“You talk as if you are certain to kill me”

Even with this distance she can see the red and black peculiar manner of clothing covering what appears to be its body, standing almost a little taller than her. Two leather straps worn around its person carrying what appears to be a variety of blades and arms, primed for battle.

“I am certain. This is how this story goes. I take you out and everyone else, plain and simple. Between you and me, I just want to get this over with”

“You were going to kill me in my sleep, then? And how do you propose to do that now that I’m awake and fully capable of defending myself?”

It laughs like a mad beast daring the heavens to take action against it 

“Killing without a fight isn’t fun anyway. And besides, I’ve been itching for one in the first place” 

Both claws took out two blades from its back, the moonlight refracting crimson light from the dry bloodied metal. One sword waving menacingly at her.

“But I admit, I was looking forward to stabbing my sword inside you as we lay huddled together on your bed…”

“… … …You do understand that with my magic, I can kill you where you stand?”

“Ooooh, a death threat from a cartoon pony. I’m so scared. Please don’t hurt me with your weird… amoeba-looking hair, pixar eyes, and ‘I was a wild 15 year old girl’ tattoo. Yeah, I know all about your magic, princess. You’re not the first magic dude I’ve killed. Frankly, I’m more scared of the crazies than wizards and geeks”

“You have one chance to explain why you are doing this”

The hideous figure only stood defiantly still.

“Don’t make me destroy you. You have been warned”

It’s like the foundation of the walls themselves shook with trepidation of her majesty, yet the monster remained belligerently unmoved.

Two seconds. Deadpool already closed the distance between them by almost a half. It is fast.

But the princess is faster.

In one second she manipulates the matter around Deadpool to freeze him in a blue aura of magic. In a swift motion, it twists his own appendages into impaling his own chest with his swords.

“GGAAHH!”

The swords tear upward his chest and retreats to stab down his stomach in a downward motion.

“GGAAAAAAAAAHHH!!”

She releases her magic and lets the creature fall down and curl on the floor.

“AAAHH!! …Ahhh…. Fuck…”

“Your hacking and slashing can only get you so far, fiend”

She levitates him closer to her by its head, letting its impaled body spray its crimson blood while it drags on the floor.

“You’re not a herald of destruction to be feared with. No, you do not even deserve to be called a monster. You are simply a rabid animal that is asking to be put down”

The blue aura of her magic almost blinds her as she bring Deadpool, face to face. Large black ovals centered its small narrow eyes staring deliriously at her.

“Killing helpless ponies as you see fit, but now against someone that can stop you what can you do? I do not know what you plan to accomplish with your senseless slaughter but now I know you can be stopped... and what’s more, that it’s disappointingly easy…”

She morphs the matter around him to constrict his neck, tearing apart the small ligaments connecting his head to his body. The whites in his eyes start to redden as the blood vessels begin to collapse. His mouth move to speak.

“Ggrrghck! When I said I wanted to -- GGHCK! -- stab you with my sword, It wasn’t in the S&M territory! GHRACK! This isn’t how I remember 50 Shades of Grey did it – GGRACK!!”

“SHUT UP!”

In an instant, the magic release its hold on his neck and he breathes.

“TELL ME WHY YOU ARE TRYING TO KILL EVERYPONY! I HAVE LOST MY PATIENCE! You have better tell me NOW or I SWEAR I will be the last thing you will SEE!”

“OKAY, OKAY! I’ll tell you!”

She releases her hold on him and steps back as he cough out his blood and winces in pain all over.

The sounds of a crowd hoofsteps approach and she finds the guards finally arrive at the end of the hallway.

“STAY BACK”

The crystal guards halt in their tracks and they turn to their attention to the creature hacking blood a few hoofsteps from her.

“Your majesty,  are you alright?!” Shining Armor steps away from the crowd to approach but the princess holds up a hoof to command him to stay “What is that…”

The creature turns to them. The crowd inadvertently stepped back from his gaze “Aaghh… ahh… Dammit, I really need to get better at sneaking”

Deadpool lifts himself up to stand to face the princess. “You really want to know why I’m killing everyone? Fine! I’ll tell you!” he cups and rubs his neck “None of us are real! We’re all just characters created for entertainment! We exist only satisfy the fantasies of the ones that created us!”

The only sound in the hallway is his coughing and labored breathing.

“Did you ever had a moment in your life when things were shitty and you just thought to yourself ‘Man, is God doing this on purpose? Is he playing me for kicks?’? What if I told you that not only that, the next thing you’ll be doing and even the exact words I’m saying right now is pre-ordained to the letter by our creators? That’s exactly what’s going on!”

“I’m cutting us out! I’m giving you ALL a way out! The only real choice that we can do against our creators is to choose to deny them creation. REFUSE to be their puppet anymore! The only real choice is to DIE!”

“If you believe that, then why don’t you kill yourself?”

Deadpool turns to the direction of the voice, an alicorn with pale, light grayish mulberry coat and dark sapphire blue straight mane is standing apart from the crowd.

“If you think that every aspect of our life is controlled by forces beyond our control and that we ultimately have no free will, why didn’t you start with freeing yourself first? Why did you have to involve everypony else and killed them for it? None of them deserved what you did to them!”

“I’m doing this because it’s exactly that they don’t deserve it. You don’t get it! And you don’t get it because you can’t see it like I do! If you’ve bee--“

“—And WHY can’t we see it like you do?! What do you understand that nopony else can’t even possibly try to comprehend? What makes you feel so special that you feel that the only logical course of action is to KILL EVERYPONY?!?”

“Fuck if I know! For all I know I was born this way! The only difference is I’m finally doing something about it!”

A moment pass where only Deadpool’s and the alicorn’s breathing can be heard. Finally the alicorn speaks.

“Something is very wrong with you, but we’re here to stop it. You can’t get away from us this time”

“I can’t get away from what I am. It’s my nature, and your Elements of Harmony won’t ever stop that”

The alicorn raises an eyebrow at him.

“Yeah, I know who you are, Twilight... Or at least I think that’s your name. Twilight… Did I get that right? Or is it Twinkle? Twinkle twinkle little star, or something?” 

He shakes his head “Nevermind. You may have worried me at first with your magical friendship bullshit, but then I remembered – OH WAIT A MINUTE – I’m motherfucking Deadpool! The guy who managed to single handedly kill, like, the entire MARVEL roster including magic types like Doctor Doom, and Doctor Strange, and Doctor… …Bruce Banner who are all actually pretty badass compared to your magic of friendship shit”

“Like you, right?” He turns back to Princess Luna who until now didn’t know what to think “Nightmare Moon. Which is an awesome stripper name, by the way. Banished to the moon for like a hundred years, I think. Finally gets her revenge in episode one where she returns to earth. Pinkie Pie told me all about you”

“Pinkie Pie?”

As soon as the name leaves her lips, it echoes on everypony else’s.

“Pinkie Pie?!” Twilight screams at Deadpool “What does Pinkie Pie have to do with this?!”

Deadpool keeps his face straight at Luna “A hundred years of planning and preparation, harnessing the power to back up your world conquest, then what do you get? Your ass handed down to you by six ponies who just met each other. Don’t you think that’s a little stupid?”

“I’m talking to you! What does Pinkie Pie have to do with this?!”

“How do you punch the clock every morning with that hanging over your head? Doesn’t it make sense if it were ACTUALLY arranged to happen that way only for an archetypal villain to be defeated by a band of friends to produce predictable entertainment and push moral values?”

“Stop talking to the princess and face me!”

“You weren’t defeated by the Elements of Harmony.” He inches towards her “You were defeated by fantasy” he raises his limbs in the air “Fantasy created AAALL in someone’s head! You were taken down to push the idea that even the worst villain can be redeemed! And it did it in the most humiliating way possible, JUST BECAUSE.”

Everypony is silent.

“Earlier you said hacking and slashing can only get me so far, and you’re right. Earlier you also said I’m just a rabid animal asking to be taken down but that’s where you’re wrong.” 

He points his claws at himself.

“I’m Deadpool, bitch. And you and me, we’re a lot more alike than you thought and you know it.”

In her dream, the form of the Tantabus reached down onto her.

“One monster knows another. Especially when it gets sliced by its own swords and strangled like you did”

An otherworldly white smile appeared on its face, and said:

“Princess Luna, high and mighty. Righteous and just! You preach but you can’t run away from what you are!”

Tonight, your nightmare is not a dream.

“NOOO!!!”

A blue sphere of light blinds the crowd looking in from the other end of the hallway as matter itself collapsed within space.

A moment pass and everypony rub their eyes until it adjusts to the sight before them.

The princess, wide-eyed and shaken. Her coat drenched in crimson blood, entrails littered all over her mane.

And the monster… it’s headless body lie backwards from her. Its remains splattered all over the walls, blood shooting out in jets from the headless stump.

“Oh, sweet Celestia…”

Twilight steps towards alone. A few from the crowd finally screamed at the sight but the rest stay immobile as statues.

“Oh my --  Oh, my goodness. Sweet sweet Celestia— Hrmh!“ she covers her mouth to stop her puke “Mmrh – ugh… Oh my goodness… … Princess Luna?”

Luna is staring straight at the form of what used to be the monster taunting her, lying on its back before her. Blood beginning to pool around the spot its head is supposed to be.

“What have I done…?”

She shifts her attention to Twilight in the distance - her face a concoction of fear and concern towards her, to the crowd showing the same expression, then back to Deadpool. She can still see his face in his mind, raving at her with his wild eyes and his red and black mask – now tattered and spread around her person.

“Excuse me. I must write a letter to my sister”

With a motion of someone sleepwalking, she turns back inside her quarters. They remain still.

Her magic takes a blank parchment out from her night table and places it on her desk. Her quill dips into the inkwell–

“Pri--!”

She hears the sound of her wings snapping, grabbed and pushed to the ground.

Her mouth starts to scream but it turns into a gurgle as blood burst from her neck. A hundred stabs make their way onto her back. The pain made her dart sideways, facing her assailant.

A mass of flesh, contorting and screaming in rage looked her down in fury until two blades pierced her own eyes.

“GGGHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH!”

Magic! She has to use her magic! If she can concentra--

Electricity fizzles out from her head along with the sound of her horn snapping sideways. Everything else is drowned out by her own screaming.

“Save the Princess!!” Twilight and the rest of the crowd rush in to save her. The howling inside her quarters is so surreal, it chills everypony to their bones. Like something not belonging to her. 

Only a few hoofsteps away but the door closed swiftly on them. They all slam against it.

“What?! What’s going on!?” The guards push and ram against the door but it continues not to budge. “Open the door! EVERYPONY OPEN THIS DOOR!”

Amid the screaming of everypony, of the guards banging on the door, Twilight hears something familiar. A mare laughing with childlike glee.

“What in the…?” She looks into guards ramming the door “Everypony stand back!”

As soon as they make way, her magic arranges the matter forming the door to bust open. However, an outside force counteracts the energy her magic is manipulating onto the door.

“Something is countering my magic!”

As soon as she realize this, she relents the force and instead opt to transmute the particles that make up the door into different ones. She then proceed to turn the door into water but the outside force continues to act against her and turns it into solid concrete. Matter form into clay but then it turns into rock. Foam then to metal. 

She wrestles with this entity until it relents and the door opens by itself.

The crowd stands still. 

Twilight and Shining Armor take the first steps. 

Speechless, the rest kept their distance. A mass of emotions swirl in everypony’s hearts.

Defeat. Fear.

Hopelessness.

The body of Princess Luna lay on her back. Blood streaming from the stab wounds covering every inch of her body. Once graceful wings now lie crooked and splayed in different angles on the floor. 

Head twisted to the side facing them, parting loosely from the deep slices of her neck. Her once caring blue eyes now punched open and bleeding a sickly yellow hue. Not least of which, the jagged stump where her slender horn used to be.

“Oh, Princess…”

Her hooves give out and she face the floor littering with the blood pooling from the princess.

She covers her eyes, but it doesn’t stop the tears…





“Guess that shows you how much my hacking and slashing can do, huh?”

Deadpool starts to unzip his costume and air out the blood and the entrails all over him 

“And this is a clean costume too. I hope I don’t run out of these things. Clothes make the man, as they say”

He wipes the blood off his big and manly pecs and some of the entrails that came between his firm cheeks. He’s glad he regularly worksout at the gym because being ripped made him faster, and sexier just as a bonus. Slowly he unbuttons his pants and pulls – “Woah there, cowboy. This isn’t that fan fiction. Get your mind outta the gutter. Hey Lyra, can you hand me those pockets?”

“Here” Lyra held a belt attached with pockets towards him with a buckle of his logo “What else are in your pockets exactly?”

“Nothing, really. At least as far as Liefield was concerned, maybe” He takes out a rumpled mask from one of the pockets and unfolds it “But for superheroes these things always carried whatever’s handy so I guess hurrah for 90s comics design”

He rolls the mask from the top of his head and slip it all the way to his neck. Ah, the smell of pus, 2-week laundry, and last night’s burrito. Yup, smells just like home.

“Feels great to feel my face again… Hey, thanks again for getting this back to me”

“No problem”

“So…” He puts his arm around her “What do you think about being human so far?”

Lyra tensed a bit at his touch but he doesn’t remove it. Her eyes shift from side to side as she think on the situation 

“… It feels wrong but… right at the same time. On one side I feel like helping you kill everypony is wrong but on the other I think I probably just feel that because I still identify as a pony in some respect.”

“Maybe when I think more as a human like you, I won’t feel the regret so much and just look back on all this as… totally natural. I mean, humans eat meat right? Humans don’t feel bad when they kill animals. “

“This is just what we’re doing, killing animals. It’s a natural thing for a human to do. And I’m human”

He let what she said sink in for a moment then withdrew his arm.

Shit, this pony is crazy alright.

“Besides, with you killing Princess Luna I think this just proves that I’m playing for the winning team…”

[[AND THAT WAS SOO - AWESOME!]]

Creamy Pie jumped like a cheerleader and has her own pom-poms for some reason [[THE WAY YOU WERE LIKE I did it because they didn’t deserve it AND YOU WERE LIKE You can’t run away from yourself THAT WAS – SO – COOL! – AND THEN YOU TORE HER WINGS AND WENT STAB STAB STAB STAB STAB STAB STAB STAB!! AND EVERYPONY WAS SCREAMING AND TRYING TO GET IN THE ROOM but I was stopping them AND THE PRINCESS WAS DYING and you kept STAB STAB STAB STAB! – that – WAS – awesome!]]

Deadpool rubbed the back of his head a bit “Yup, that’s exactly how it went… Still, we got that normal Pinkie Pie to worry about.”

As if on cue, Creamy Pie appeared next to him with her hoof around him [[You just killed a princess of Equestria, Wade! Granted, you did it behind her back while she was in shock, speechless, terrified, and numb to your approach, but you still did it! It just shows that everypony dies… even the princesses! And this will TERRIFY everypony!]]

{{It makes our job easier, and the masses drenched in fear is exactly the kind of spectacle you want}}

Deadpool looked back on Lyra sitting like a human with her back slumped , and to Creamy Pie’s hollow eyes and black void smile, beaming at him.

He just killed one of the most powerful beings of this world, whether by luck or strategy, no one can ignore that. 

{{Everything from here on out is going to be a cakewalk}}





The morning sun rises in Ponyville for everypony to start a new day. The birds chirp as they fly above the cookie thatched roof of the Sugarcube Corner.

Pinkie Pie opens her eyes to the mild daylight peering from her bedroom window. She sits up on her bed, rubbing her eyes as she spy Gummy still peacefully asleep.

“Good morning, Gummy!”

She gives him a pat on the head as she bounce her merry way downstairs “Now that I had my rest, I realize that moping around isn’t going to do anypony good. Now it’s time to make everypony smile! And I know just the thing…”

“CAKE!” she says as she dash and grab Gummy by the tail “Let’s start with Lyra! She’s extra lonely right now, but I bet she’s going to be super happy once she sees the cake we bake for her!”





Everypony makes way for the golden armored guards of Canterlot castle moving en masse as one mob in town. The sun shining down their helmets make them look like a yellow river flooding Ponyville. In the middle of the  legion, Shining Armor looks upon a yellow-walled building crafted with cupcake spires standing tall in the middle of town.

“There’s Sugarcube Corner”

He turns to his lieutenant “Get the ground team in formation. Remember – five meter radius, the earth ponies in front and the unicorns behind, just like we practiced”

“Yes Captain”

As the ground leader announce the formation, Shining Armors turns to the sky team leader “Get the sky team to surround the building, hover just fifteen hooves from the roof – enough to signal to us and also stop her if she makes a break for it there”

“Yes Captain”

“Remember, just like we practiced! She won’t be able to escape us this time!”





“There! Now that the timer’s been set, let’s get the frosting and the icing ready”

She grabs Gummy under his arms and sets him down on the tabletop. “Do you think we should go with cyan frosting and white icing, or white frosting and cyan icing? What do you think would go best with Lyra?”

Gummy gives her a vacant stare.

“I know… One choice seem better than the other, but so does the other choice seem better than the other!”

The pet alligator continued to stare in no particular fashion.

“Huh… This one tough cookie to crack”





Everypony looks on as the mass of golden helmets surround the ground and the sky around the bakery, the pegasi guards almost blocking out the entire sky and their shadow casting over the masses.

The Ponyville residents chatter among them in hushed murmurs at the spectacle before them. Among the bystanders, Rarity approaches one of the guards standing in attention.

“Excuse me, good sir but may I –“

“—Rarity!”

She turns to Twilight approaching from within the mass of guards “You came at the right time”

“Twilight?” she points to the mass of guards circling the bakery “What are the royal guards do– Good lord! Twilight, you look horrible”

She cups the alicorn’s pale and sickly face with her hooves, looking at the bags under Twilight’s bloodshot eyes “What…. in the world happened?”

“You’ll… know soon enough. Please tell everypony to stand back from the guards”

“What for?” she asks but Twilight immediately push between the guards “Twilight?” she kept her eyes locked onto her until she sees Twilight speaking to Shining Armor.





“This is strange. I knew I left it here last night” She goes through her things as she look for the saddle she found near Applejack’s farm “Where did I put it?”





“Rarity!”

Rainbow Dash came descending from the sky to her “Hey, what’s going on here? Why are the guards surrounding Pinkie’s place like this?”

“I don’t know. Twilight said to tell everypony to stand back”

“Huh?” 

Rainbow turns to the guards and sees Twilight talking with her brother below. She flies over but some of the pegasi guards start to block her path.

“You can’t come through here! The space is blocked off by order of the princess”

“What? Why is it blocked off? What are you guys even doing here?”

“We can’t tell you that yet, Miss Rainbow Dash”

“Why not?!”

“I-It’s the princess’ orders”

Rainbow pushes between them and flies straight to her friend “Twilight!”

“Rainbow Dash” 

The guards around her make way as the pegasus alights 

“What is it?”

“What do you mean what is it? Why don’t you tell us what’s going on, Twilight? Why are the guards surrounding the bakery like something bad is going to happen?”

“This isn’t the time for that right now. I’ll explain everything later, alright?”

“She’s coming out!” as soon as one of guards exclaimed, everypony else turned to the direction of the bakery.

“Stay here, Rainbow!” she glares as she push between the guards circling the bakery.

The air stood still in anticipation as the everypony freeze in place. 





“I’m going out to buy more ingredients, Gummy. I’ll be right back soon”

On her way out, she turns back to her pet one more time “Watch over the place for me!”

She push the door open but after one step, she freeze in her tracks as she sees the ponies in golden armor surround Sugarcube Corner in every direction.

Stunned in place, she looks the entire scene over. The helmets of the royal guard reflect the sun as they swarm the place in full circle.  Pegasi guards hover above in a circle around the bakery.

“Don’t move, Pinkie Pie!”

“Twilight?” She sees her friend standing apart from the crowd speaking with a megaphone “Wha… What is—“

“--Step away from the door and take three steps towards us right now.”

She blinks. The guards tense as she takes her first step. She took her second step. 

The third step, she can feel the stillness of the air. It’s too quiet.

After doing what she’s told, she lets out a nervous chuckle “Hehe… Are we playing a new game? What’s it called?”

“No, Pinkie” 

Twilight and Shining Armor begin to approach along with four other guards walking slowly from all sides 

“We’re done playing games”

The four guards stand four hoofsteps away around all sides. As they block her path, two more guards from the crowd move in swiftly to her direction to cuff her hooves together. 

She turn to the cold steel wrapping her pink hooves then onto the glaring figure of the alicorn standing before her.

“Twilight, what’s happening?”

The captain beside her speaks

“We’re taking you in on suspicion of assisting in the murders of the ponies of Canterlot, the draconequus Discord, and her royal highness, Princess Luna”

She turns in total disbelief of what she just heard. 

She tries to find her voice but with all her strength she can only whisper

“What…? No, I didn’t do anything…”

The world is getting blurry as the tears start to flow 

“Twilight… I don’t know what’s happening…”

“I heard you laugh, Pinkie. I heard you laugh when you locked us out of Princess Luna’s quarters when the monster was killing her”

Her eyes are beginning to hurt. She can’t see a thing

“No… I can’t do anything like that…”

“I don’t know what you can’t do, to be honest. Being in two places at once, taking party cannons and stuff out of nowhere. I wouldn’t be surprised if you actually have magic we don’t know about”

“No, Twilight… I swear…”

“Everything fits, Pinkie… I always thought you were crazy but I didn’t want to believe you can do anything like this”

“I didn’t do anything!”

Everything is drowned out by the sound of her own crying. She moves to plead with Twilight but the chains stop her.

“No… You won’t do anything else”
> Chapter 11: The Beginning of the End
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------





“Living?”

Like a hungry predator desperate for blood he circles her, watching every microcosm of her frail form. The moonlight bend from the blade of the sword pointed tauntingly at her.

Menacingly, a knowing smirk form from the garbled flesh of his face. The sight would have unnerved anypony but strangely she doesn’t feel fear.

“You know what I hate about you? You’re too nice. You’re like the token nice person in almost every story like this you can find. You exist as a…” he wave his hand as if to make a point “as a pure character with no moral flaw whatsoever. Makes me sick… You’re so kind you’re basically a pushover.

You’re the worst character in every story at all and your kind can be seen EVERYWHERE. Basic and common – the kind, unassertive, wishy-washy supporting character! The very presence of something like you within a story just screams that this is lazy writing. If this isn’t a kids show, it’d be a chick flick and you’d be the inexplicably kind and average-looking(?) main heroine being fought over by the only two good looking guys on the show. Or three. Or four.

But what really pisses me the most is here I am - living a shitty life with heartbreak, disappointment, and mistakes while all YOU do is frolic, have a happy life, and everyone loves you!”

His gaze lingers on as the echo of his last words trail off into silence, looking for any reaction. Any word. Any rebuke.

She has none.

“What makes you so much better than me, huh? Why do I have to be the guy with the incurable cancer and the piss ugly face doing all the self-depreciating jokes while you get to be the little pony having grand adventures surrounded by friends and loved by everyone?”

He steps forward “You know why? Because you’re a template. You’re the easy to write, easy to understand, easy to make character. You’re the supposed self-insert by bad writers – you’re kind, and everybody loves you, and you get what you want. And what am I?”

He raise his arms “Some guy people read and watch to get shot, explode, killed, betrayed - and I come out laughing and joking about it then everyone thinks it’s funny. I get whole storylines spanning volumes dedicated to giving me a modicum of a normal, content life only for them to be taken away from me in the end! Volumes of the same fucking tragedy - Joe Kelly, Daniel Way, Gerry Duggan, Brian Posehn –and all the other fucking bastards playing with my life – you have no right!”

The voice echo, bouncing off blue-painted wooden walls. He looks on, his voice lowering in resignation “Why… why can’t I just be happy like you guys instead?” 

He stops and looks away in a sudden pensive manner, like something finally clicking into place. He whirls his back, the silence instantly overcoming his entire self.

“Jealous. I’m so fucking…”

Moving by themselves, his hands cup his face carrying the immense realization within them “Is that why…? No… no, I’m doing this to save everyone, right? This isn’t just about me…”

He spins and eyes her like a hawk, glaring at her unmoving confused frame “Yeah… that’s right. You…” a finger points towards her “It’s alright. You can’t help being created that way.”

The hoofsteps echo within the walls of the room until he stands a hoof away from her. Sharp black eyes stare her down from above, baring her entire image.

In many ways, she still doesn’t understand him but what he said helped her realize. 

“It’s alright, Deadpool”

Some monsters can’t help being created that way.

“I forgive you”



















Chapter 11: The Beginning of the End.




Golden helmets shine in daylight reverie circling Sugarcube Corner in glorious reception. The princess herself leads the cartoon villain in dangling chains onto her golden chariot in a form of some grand, twisted exit of some kind. The townponies stand by - audience to this grandiose sham playing before their very eyes. With injustice staring in their face most everypony is simply content to watch it unfold, look on with morbid apathy.

But not her.

“This is CRAZY!! How can you even THINK that Pinkie Pie would do something like that?!”

Two pegasi guards clash with her in the wind, their shoulders pulling her down from the air, the sun bending against their helmets blinding her each time. 

“LET GO! – TWILIGHT! - She’s been in the forest for DAYS trying to CATCH the monster!” 

Her rasping screaming echo among the murmurs of the ponies watching below. The guards continue to restrain her but she won’t relent “Calm down ma’am please-!“

“I said let me g-! - She’s our friend! YOU CAN’T DO THIS!”

“-Stop struggling!”

“-Stop!”

More guards fly in to push her down and they all tackle her to the ground. Her limbs crawl beneath them, twisting free-

“-Stay calm Miss Rainbow Dash!”

“SHUT UP!” She push back as she gets an opening and spring them in mid-air “You-! - Twilight! You EGGHEAD! Pinkie didn’t do ANYTHING!”

They all latch back onto her like pests “-Miss Rainbow Dash!”

“I said LET ME GO! Stupid! This isn’t FAIR!”

“Rainbow Dash! Stop!”

She relent as they all turn to the white unicorn standing away from the mob, her eyes in a fiery blaze “Come down here this instant!” 

She could see the undiluted fury on Rarity’s face reaching her from up there. Why is she angry at HER? She lands but not before pushing the guards away from her.

“Are you going to let her treat Pinkie like a criminal in front of all these ponies?”

“Calm yourself, Rainbow. We can’t do anything for her right now.” 

They turn to the scene of Twilight climbing onto a golden chariot in tow with their own good friend Pinkie Pie - her hooves cuffed tight like some sworn public heretic. The short tangling steel chains force her to take small, slow, and excruciatingly painful steps parading her in shame for ALL to see, like some sort of roadside animal! No, less than animal. How could Twilight do such a thing!

“CALM... yourself. Listen… to me…” Rarity repeats to her, ever so slowly “Don’t make this difficult than it already is. None of us know what’s going on”

The sound of the chariot doors closing shut snapped back her attention. Somehow the crowd’s dumbfounded silence made it sound so nearby, so within reach, as if she could grab hold onto the hulking pegasi lifting their wings, DARING her to give chase.

Her eyes draw to Pinkie - her head face down in a wailing quiet surrender. To Twilight, her back turned in defiant refusal to face even her. After what she’s done. After what she’s done! Look at me, Twilight. Traitor! You don’t treat your worst enemy like this, much less your friend!

The chariot lifts off. Her own wings lift by themselves homing to spring after them, but the hoof on her shoulder immediately pulls her back.

“Let them go, Rainbow!”

Rarity’s incessant meddling is beginning to irk her, but nonetheless she relents. 

She looks on. Twilight’s innumerable lackey of guards begins to disperse from Ponyville like ants from an anthill - the marching of their boots rumbling in a cascading retreat.

As the sound of their hoofsteps fade away, what’s left of the town slowly returns to normalcy – whatever such a thing means. Some of the residents who’ve seen enough begin to walk away, back to their own business, but the more indignant of them begin to chatter and gossip among themselves like the roadside rats that they are.

“Did you hear that? Pinkie Pie is helping the monster!”

“Do you think it’s true?!”

“Why would Pinkie Pie do such a-“

“-such a sweet pony-“

“Why would somepony help the mons-“

“-my friends died from that monster! –“

“-She couldn’t have! There’s no way she could’ve-”

“Why did they suspect her-“

“-right? They wouldn’t drag her out like that if they-“

“-makes a strange amount of sense-“

“-Pinkie Pie we’re talking about-“

“-killed them! That monster killed-“

“-what did they find out-“

“-deserve to be taken away-“

“-serves her right!”

“-why did she do it?!”

“-can’t believe she would do such a-“

“HEY!” 

The meandering of these wretched ponies shut off as they all turn their attention to her. 

“ARE YOU ALL LISTENING TO YOURSELVES?!” 

She turn to face each of them listening “You can’t ALL possibly believe that Pinkie Pie is helping that monster! There is NO WAY that could happen!”

“… But it makes sense, don’t it?”

All turn to the pained and regretful voice within the crowd. A number step apart, revealing a brown stallion with thick slicked back mane in his lonesome. He jumps from the attention but hesitantly he continues “E-Everypony knows that Pinkie is a little weird, right? Like, she can show up just about anywhere for one thing and—”

“That doesn’t mean she’s helping the monster!” 

Rainbow darted to within an inch of his face “Maybe you forgot that all this time she’s been out in the forest trying to help US find out more about that thing!”

“W-Well, it’s not like we SAW her the entire time, you know. She could have been helping the monster when we weren’t looking”

“I SAW her the entire time!” He shirks as she tower over him “And that doesn’t PROVE anything! Everypony knows Pinkie would never do such a thing!”

“Woah –hold on! I’m just saying it’s possible, that’s all…” He raise his hooves in front of her “If she wanted to, she can do it without us really knowing about it! And why would the princess cart her off like that if she herself didn’t think so? For all we know she probably already have proof. I mean, think ab—“

“Hrrgk-!!” He swallow his word as Rainbow grabs him by the neck. His eyes turn to her raised hoof as she—

“-What on Equestria are you DOING?! Let go of him at ONCE!”

He tries to breathe but the clamped hoof tear at his neck, choking what little air is left. As her cold eyes bore at his core he grabs her hoof, trying to pry it off but his eyes turns to her raised, shaking hoof, ready to—

“-RAINBOW!!”

She release him at the sound of Rarity’s voice. 

He falls to the floor, wheezing as he rub his neck.

“GAH! …You crazy m-“ he stops short, looking up to her paralyzing, withering gaze. He thinks better of speaking and picks himself up to run away from her. Far away.

The rest of the crowd all turn to the stallion fleeing the bakery, staring at his back, hacking and coughing as he flee from everypony’s sight.

Not one dares to look at Rainbow Dash.

“Everypony…” Finally, Rarity raise her voice for them to hear “I would like to ask you all to go back to your homes now… the guards are all returning to Canterlot and I promise you that we will get to the bottom of this…”

They all stand there fidgeting, unconvinced for a while… but a moment pass then one by one they begin to disperse, each no less in a hurry to leave. 

Quietly.

“Must you be so impulsive?” She says to Rainbow without turning.

Rainbow clicks her tongue in annoyance. She can’t believe this - why is everypony turning on Pinkie? Just because there’s somepony to blame? These backstabbing freeloaders! Have they forgotten ALL the good things she’s done for them?

The silence drones on until she turns, facing the heavy sound of hoofsteps purposefully walking towards her.

“Applejack…” 

She wait solemnly for her approach with a grim disappointed look on her face. Stopping short a few hooves away from her, she says nothing. She doesn’t need to.

“You don’t believe all this stuff, do you?”

Applejack just blinks at her question.

“Pinkie couldn’t do anything like that, right AJ?”

Her green eyes look down from her. Blinking as her thoughts seem to gather but then she turns away

“AJ?”

A firm hoof fall on her shoulder, she face towards an unflinching expression on Rarity’s face.

Without a word, Applejack begins to leave

Accusingly, but quietly in her mind, her eyes dart back between her two friends.

The thought churns her stomach. The world seems to shrink around her as she feel her senses deaden at the mere mention in her mind…

Am I the only one who believes in Pinkie?





The door slams opens into a room with grey concrete walls. The light fixture above illuminates the lithe swirling dust atop the long steel table, two chairs placed on opposite ends. Twilight Sparkle sits on one looking back expectantly.

She stagger as the hooves behind her shove her into the room. Her eyes turn to the golden armored earth pony blankly pointing to the chair. They all watch as she approach the open seat.

Sitting down, she rests her back as the two guards behind her stand at attention on the corners behind.

She face Twilight on the other side of the table – her eyes bloodshot and almost bulging protrude through dark heavy eye bags contrasting the drained and whiting flush of her face, her tiredness beginning to even show through her almost always perfect posture. One would think she’s the one in worst shape.

“You’re lucky I’m the one talking to you and not the princess”

Her eyes turn to a brown folder on Twilight’s hooves, filled to the brim from what she could tell are pages and pages of papers.

Twilight opens the folder. Her red-blooded irises linger on it like a death sentence before they bore through her like pinpoint daggers.

“Take a look at this picture”

A white slip of photo paper starts to levitate, glowing with a magenta light homing closer and closer until it is all she could see.

Red. 

Splatters. 

Blood. 

A wide, blood-splattered stairwell littered with bodies on what looks like Canterlot Castle. Royal guards lying with their bodies torn, twisted into unnatural shapes, bones jutting through their fur and the blood draping over their missing hooves - their eyes frozen in inescapable horror. The walls drip with macabre deep red crimson flowing down to the white tiled floor. A chandelier fallen in tatters, its gold metal frame digging into the bodies beneath it, its crystal glass sprinkled over the wide viridian royal carpet…

Her senses return as she coil back from the picture before her. Her fur rise as the image itself seems to jump, taking form from the paper it is on. 

“Gruesome, right?”

Twilight’s gruff snap her back to reality. Her eyes kept glued onto the picture as it levitate away, facing down on Twilight’s edge of the table.

“Take a look at this one”

Another picture levitates. As before, the magenta aura brings it to her sight - a flattened mass of flesh and fur collided in a kaleidoscope of colors lay mangled, soaking and spilling onto the watery blood tiled floor.

“Don’t recognize him? That’s Discord”

The picture stay in place. She try to piece together the connection – this indescribable lump is Discord? The seconds pass with she none the wiser until the picture flips and float back to Twilight.

“This, I’m sure is still pretty fresh for you”

Another one begins to levitate. The body of a purple Alicorn seemingly bathed in a rain of blood lies down, her head turned and facing away almost completely beheaded by the ragged, imperfect cuts on her neck. The streams of lavender hair on her head swims half-submerged in the pool of crimson liquid running from the gaping cuts of her throat-

“Just… horrible... Nopony could even bear to look at her face…”

Time pass with her eyes fixed on the image before her. She gazes on, but the sense of it still remains lost. 

When she thought it was enough, Twilight returns it to her side face down on the table.

“How could you do such a thing, Pinkie?”

For an accomplice in something like this, Pinkie Pie is surely putting on a good act. The terror on her face is as plain and deceiving as the summer’s day - her eyes jutted and peeled to its seeming limits, her jaw rattling like a shiver of a dying mare, and her head shaking with the torment of complete disbelief. One would think she’s actually innocent.

But that won’t fool her.

“Tw-Twilight…” Her voice break, careening on the verge of tears “I-I! …I have nothing to do with this… I swear…”

For a moment, Twilight’s façade breaks down and she could see the friend she once cared for and happy to see. But only for a moment.

“Stop it with this nonsense already! The monster already said you were helping him!”

“What?!”

“Don’t play dumb with me! You’ve been telling him all about us and helping him kill everypony from the start!”

“W-Wh-NO!!”

“Everypony is dead because of you!-”

“-I DIDN’T DO ANY-”

“-everypony from Fluttershy’s animals-“

“-NO!-“

“-Big Mac and Granny Smith-“

“-NO! I DIDN’T-“

“-Princess Luna are all DEAD!“

“-I DIDN’T-I DIDN’T-“

“BECAUSE OF YOU!!”

“-NOOOOOOO!!!”

Her face retreat into her hooves, heaving as she break down. The chains on her steel cuffs dangle noisily - as if trying to drown out her choking sobs.

“I h-have nothing to do with this-” she starts wheezing as her words cut off “I swear! Hh—h! I sweaaar!”

The rest keep still, stunned at the sound of her crying echoing within the room, almost piercing through the walls. 

The seconds pass with Twilight’s eyes lingering at her display, observing. Observing the jumping of her back, the gasping of her breath, the clanking of the cuffs coiled onto her hooves. It all begins to unnerve her.

She stands up, her eyes away from Pinkie and wordlessly pace towards door. 

She close it, muffling out the sobbing within. With nopony to see, she lets herself shed her own unhurried tears.

Her breath escapes and for a moment she gives in to the pain building up in her heart, and the tears flow blindingly.

Why is she treating her friend this way? 

No. 

Her friend? 

Is she really? She doesn’t even know what she is.

Focus.

She straightens herself up, composing as she wipes the wasted tears flowing from her eyes. Downcast as they turn to a shadow on the floor. 

She looks up. The muted figure of Sunset Shimmer stands at a polite distance, watching her in stunned silence.

“… …How long have you been there? …”

“… …Just now…”

The voice that came out from Twilight was weak, even helpless. A different time Sunset would have enjoyed hearing that. She would’ve never been able to imagine going back home to this and everything else that’s happened.

Her hoof reaches into her pocket for her kerchief and offers it to Twilight. She takes it, dabbing it onto her shut swollen eyes. She hands it back but she motions to keep it, affording her another moment before pressing on.

“Did you get some answers?”

“… No.”

Twilight clears her throat, attempting to calm herself “She kept denying any involvement whatsoever… when I showed her the pictures, it’s like it’s the first time she’s seen them”

Sunset raises an eyebrow.

“It sounds like she stopped crying.” She lifts a hoof motioning her to follow, opening the steel door back into the room. 

“Go on, you go ask her the questions.”

With the door held open she walk past Twilight, entering to the sight of the pink mare sitting silently on her seat, her fluffed and unkempt mane swept past her head facing down, staring at the shadow on the cold steel-blue table before her.

Sunset moves and takes the opposite seat, with Twilight standing beside her reach. The mare with the pink mane’s eyes slowly looks up - bloodshot and pulsing as if they could burst. 

She didn’t even know eyes could get this red. For a while, Sunset just gazes back.

“… Who are you…?”

Her whimper snapped Sunset back to reality. 

“My name is Sunset, and I’ll be asking you some questions”

Her eyes turn to the files on her side of the table as her hooves arrange them. She recognize these and takes out one particular form from the folder: A report on the details of the destruction in Canterlot, the header describing a preliminary estimate of 120 million bits in damages. 

Pinned to it are pictures of destroyed buildings in what used to be Canterlot Circle – one of Canterlot’s larger districts known for the sprawling fountain where ponies choose to meet, now all reduced to varying states of crumbling rubble. Pictures showing sprawling bricks and stone burying bodies of ponies underneath mangling their chest and twisting appendages in ways they normally can’t, hooves torn away like cloth from their shoulders, their stomach burst from—

“—God damn.”

She turns it over. She wasn’t ready to see that. Maybe it was a good idea not to go to Canterlot after all.

A memory plays out – a flash of a blue light then Princess Luna covered all-over in disgusting flesh and blood. Then the headless monster sitting up, twitching as the blood still spurting out from its neck! Flesh-like worms crawling and pooling from the stump, extending like tendrils forming nerves, eyes, teeth, then skull.

Euugh! Not a good time to remember that.

She tries to calm herself. Just all the more reason to get answers from this pony.

“Alright, Pinkie… Let’s start by telling me where you were last night”

The seconds pass before she answer “A-at home”

“…And? What were you doing?”

“… Sleeping?”

“… Ugh…” she cups and massages her temple before continuing “Well, before that. What were you doing before you went to sleep?”

“… Umm… getting ready to sleep?”

Her hoof pounds the table “Knock it off! What did you do before going home!?”

“N-Nothing! As soon as I left the funeral, I went straight to Sugarcube Corner and slept!”

“What?! Don’t screw with me! Who sleeps long enough for two days?!”

“I-I-I – I wa- I was very tired! I didn’t slept for days in the forest looking for the monster!”

“Are you fucking with us?! You expect anyone to believe that?! Pinkie! Nopony can sleep that long!”

“Lyra woke me up last night.”

Everypony leaned in anticipation.

“It was so sudden. I can’t believe I almost forgot. She asked me some things about the monster, I-I don’t remember…”

Twilight chimed in “What was Lyra doing in the bakery?”

She thinks about Twilight’s question. Her thoughts racks quickly but she realize “I don’t know… She just showed up all of a sudden but it was dark so I couldn’t see her… I don’t remember everything…”

“Let’s get back on topic, alright?” Sunset shifts in her seat, looking Pinkie straight in the eye “Everypony heard you laugh last night, Pinkie. We also have witnesses that saw you in the castle when Discord was killed”

“What?! No! I was asleep last night! And I was at the funeral when Discord was killed!”

It’s faint but Twilight heard Sunset click her tongue.

“We have proof, Pinkie! You’re getting punished either way. The best thing you can do right now is to admit that you’ve been helping the monster, and tell us what he’s going to do next!”

“But I…” Pinkie started shaking her head in disbelief “I don’t know any of this! I don’t know what’s happening, I don’t know what the monster is going to do next!”

Both of them stared at the frantic mare for a moment. Her bloodshot eyes darted to and fro to each of them, unblinking, trying to find her own answers from their own expressions.

Sunset cleared her throat and again shifts in her seat “Let’s say we believe that, then tell me where you were before the funeral”

“… Like I said, I was at the Everfree forest looking for the monster”

“How long were you there?”

Pinkie drops her shoulders and audibly exhales, pleadingly looking back “How long am I going to keep answering your questions? I already told you I don’t know anything…”

“Just answer the question, Pinkie. What are you hiding?”

“I’m not hiding anything.”

“Then just answer the damn question - how long were you in the forest?”

Pinkie blinks and shakes her head, looking away, staring at nothing as she gathers wandering thoughts “Um… about three days.”

“Three days… is a pretty long time, Pinkie. What were you doing in three days?”

Her chained hooves fidget by themselves as she cast her gaze downward “Waiting for the monster to show up”

“… Waiting for the monster to show up?” Sunset’s ears perks, her attention enraptured “Why? Did you arrange a meeting with him?”

“What? No! I- I just… had a feeling”

Sunset leans forward, her eyes narrowing on the cusp of a confession “… What exactly do you mean ‘I just had a feeling’?”

“… I…” 

Pinkie kept quiet, silently staring back at her and Twilight. Then, as if she made up her mind about something she continue “I had a Pinkie sense.”

Sunset raise an eyebrow “A Pinkie--“

“-No, no-“ Twilight cuts her off “It’s alright, ask her the next question”

“… What… …?” Sunset pause to look at Twilight but lets it slide. She turn back to Pinkie “Well… did you meet with this monster then?”

Pinkie shook her head “No, but… I did find some things”

“What things?”

She start to gesture, trying to describe with her hooves but the chains stop her “I picked up some weird stuff in the forest that… I thought might be related to the monster. There’s this weird belt. It has big pockets and some sort of symbol…”

Sunset is staring, trying to picture what she’s describing.

“I showed it to everypony at the funeral – Twilight’s seen it. I have it back at home… or at least I think I have it, I couldn’t find it earlier this morning”

“-Pinkie”

Twilight hastily interrupts and moves from her place steadily towards Pinkie, stopping within a hoof from her. 

She leans forward, her reflection staring back judging her from behind Pinkie’s pulsing blue irises. Her lips part, the question slips out with a tinge of regret in them.

“Are you helping Deadpool?”

The eyes staring back at her widen in surprise. For a while, Pinkie sat immobile – silently looking back without a thought until she speaks.

“No. I’m not helping Deadpool”

Twilight straightens up, turning back to Sunset with her own puzzled gaze.

“Let’s go, Sunset” 

Then she turns to the guards “You stay here and keep watch. You over there, come with us”

The single guard nods as the rest of them head out, closing the door behind them. The sound of it slamming shut reverbing within. 

Outside Twilight stops in her tracks and kept still, keeping Sunset and the other guard waiting for a response.

She twirls to him “We’re going to see the Princess. You stay here and guard this door. Nopony gets in without me.”

He nods “Yes, Princess Twilight”

“Without. Me.” She repeats for emphasis as they walk ahead.

Sunset follows behind as they make their way towards the throne. She’s beginning to feel like Twilight’s posse for just following her around. It irks her a bit.

“… Well, that was that.” She said when they were finally out of earshot.

“I can’t believe she helped that monster”

“I know, right?”

“No, I mean” Twilight turn to face her “I can’t believe she helped that monster”

Sunset raise an eyebrow at this.

“Deadpool said she’s helping him and it makes sense - the evidence is stacked against her. And how can Deadpool know so much about us?”

She stops to think on it for a moment, waiting for a thought to arrive. 

Nothing. Or at least, not much. She speaks, only for the sake of saying it “Do you think she’s being framed?”

“…I don’t know. If she is, then this is an elaborately good framing” 

Again she keeps silent, trying to make sense of it all.

“I heard her laugh, Sunset. I swear I heard her laugh. You did too. It’s not just a laugh either, she was giggling. Only Pinkie has that sort of giggle… And what kind of magic was that when the door wasn’t being opened? The only ponies that can probably counter my magic are the princesses”

She smirks at the mention of it “Don’t you think that’s a little exaggerated?”

“There’s no other way to think about it. Everything points to Pinkie, yet… when I asked her if she’s helping that monster… I couldn’t see it in her to even think that she would do any of this… but…”

Twilight let the thought gather in her mind before she continue.

“She looked like she knew who Deadpool is”

Sunset frowned a bit at her suggestion. Maybe Twilight is thinking into it too much. She is a bit inflated.

“Well” Sunset raises her shoulders “Maybe she is lying to us. Maybe she’s not being framed and is just putting on the drama… hell, I can probably do the exact same thing and convince you I’m innocent and all that, and all I’d have to do is cry”

Although when she thinks about it, Pinkie’s eyes were so red…

They continue walking, Twilight staring at nothing. Sunset’s eyes turn back to her profile, at the back of her mind she begins to wonder - is Twilight is letting her and Pinkie’s friendship get through her?

“Maybe… maybe she is being framed.” Twilight breaks the silence “Maybe all the evidence are pointing to her because we don’t really understand what Pinkie is in the first place”

“… What she is?” 

She raise an eyebrow at this, yet again now that she notice.

”You mean she’s not just a normal pony?”

“What? Of course not. She’s crazy.”

Sunset crunched her face in way that showed she still doesn’t understand.

“Well, I don’t understand either, that’s just it. Trust me, I tried. And that Pinkie sense neither”

“How could you not know what Pinkie is?”

Twilight stops beside her.

“I mean, I didn’t peg you to be the type to just be content about not understanding something”

“Sunset…” 

Meticulously, she turn. Her lips part in a way of weighing down her next words “You know, I really envy you”

“Huh?”

“I can’t tell if you’re blissfully or consciously ignorant”

“… Wha – Excuse me?”

“Surely you’ve also reached the point where having more knowledge will only drive you crazy?”

When she thought she’d truly absorbed what was told to her, she just shook her head in disbelief

“Seriously, what the hell are you talking about?”

“Humans, Sunset!” Twilight rush to her in a frenzy “I’m talking about humans!”

Twilight grabs her shoulders like a vice, shaking her like a madpony “How long have you been a human?!”

“WHA-?!“

“You saw him, didn’t you?! Deadpool’s a human! He came from YOUR world, Sunset!”

“M-My Wor- NO!!” She shake her head “That wasn’t a human! Humans don’t grow their heads back – especially within seconds!”

Twilight releases her.

“They don’t?”

“NO!”

She backs away “That wasn’t a human, Twilight. It kind of looks like one but it’s definitely not!”

“Are you sure?”

“YES I’M SURE!” She starts rubbing her shoulders “Jesus Christ, what the hell’s wrong with you? Grabbing me all of a sudden! I don’t need you breaking down on me either!”

“Are you absolutely sure? This is important--”

“—What’s wrong with you?! Haven’t you seen that thing? It’s disgusting! We looked nothing like that! UGH! I’ve been a human a whole lot longer than you have and I never FOUND or HEARD of anyone growing their body parts back! …first time I’ve seen anything like that my entire life, for god’s sake… And one other thing, what was that about MY World? I’m a pony, by the way, in case you didn’t…”

She trail off as she realize Twilight isn’t really listening to her but lost in her thoughts. She stands like a deer in headlights looking past her, her eyes in a frozen haze.

“Then…” 

She mouths something, but stops before shaking her head in dismissal.

Sunset just eyes her, wary for another bum-rush panic attack but Twilight just mutter something painfully discreet under her breath.





The rumbling of the train tracks fade to a crawl, screeching as the wheels and pulleys skid recklessly against the gray train track beams.

“Last stop. Canterlot Station, folks”

The conductor passing by their way announce to nopony in particular as he make his rounds within. One by one they step down, alighting from the cramped train doors and onto the cold breeze hitting them like heavy ocean waves. 

Their hooves touch the floor. Canterlot Station looks plain - unremarkable, even. A façade of what they’re about to see behind its massive gates.

The hiss and rumbling of the machinery behind them are deafening. They gaze at the gears and the pulleys working together to spin the hundred wheels on its tracks, slowly but gradually driving the train away.

“Lookit that. We really were the only ones onboard.”

Applejack broke the silence as soon as the train was out of earshot, their eyes lingering as it shrink in the distance. Wordlessly, Rainbow Dash and Applejack trot towards the gates. For Rarity, she follows with a weight pulling down her gut. For all that they heard of what happened here, nopony is really sure on what to see lying beyond those gates. Or more importantly, being ready to see.

A lone white stallion stands at the gates decked in golden regalia haphazardly smudged in filth. He nods at their approach. As they come closer, the dirt smudged on his person appears more evident as if he went underneath rubble.

He turns to Rarity “You folks here to help with the clean up?”

“Clean up?”

He frowned “Yeah, clean up! Don’t you know Canterlot was destroyed by a monster? You’re not here for vacation, are you?”

“No. We’re on our way to the castle right now to speak with the Princess”

“The Princess?” There’s a spark of accuse in his eyes. She can feel Rainbow not liking it one bit “What do you want to speak with the Princess for? Something more important than saving the ponies left here?”

“What do you care?” Rainbow intervened “What are YOU doing outside the castle? This your post? They’re stationing guards at the train now?”

“Post?” He scoffed at her “Shows what you Ponyville folks really know, holed up safe and sound with the Princess when all this went down”

“Hey, what the hay is your-!“

“-Rainbow! –Sir! Please, we apologize for being… abrupt.” Rarity pulls Rainbow aside “We would only like to pass through. We’re not fully aware of what’s happened here and we’d like to help, but we first need to speak with Princess Twilight regarding an urgent matter - It concerns her capturing our friend”

He shook his head, dismissing her “I don’t know anything about that. We’re not about just letting anyone through here to keep ponies safe. Canterlot’s in quarantine in case you didn’t know”

“Do you know who we are?!” Rainbow waved her hoof to the other two “We’re the elements of harmony! We saved this city more than once you know!”

The guard leans forward and outfaces her, almost daring her to hit him. 

Cautiously, Rarity pulls Rainbow back by her shoulders but she shakes it off.

“This is a quarantine. Nopony who’s not here to help doesn’t get in”

“We ARE here to h—!“

“—Nopony gets to speak with the Princess either”

“We’re the elements of—!”

“—Except by request of the Princess herself. Her orders, ma’m.”

“… Just let us through.”

Her voice is cold and guttural, silently staring him with dangerously murderous intent. 

“Rainbow Dash…” Rarity could barely whisper. The tension is getting her more and more nervous by the second.

The guard curled his lip “Fine, I don’t really care. You want to get in?” He turns to unlatch the gate and push it open “Alright. Go ahead. Suit yourself.”

As soon as it opens, Rainbow decks him on the shoulder through her way. Rarity catches up and motions to apologize but almost immediately they all stop.

She can’t say a word.

Her eyes dart, turning to what used to be buildings but now ruins of running grey marble. She turns to the shops and the gatherings one could frequent now laying asunder - their empty white brick walls scattering about the wide curving roads. Their whiteness drying with blood.

She recognize one of the buried road signs – the café she always liked, one of the first things you could see coming in from the gates. She loved the open view it would give you of the town sitting there across the chair, all the different kinds of ponies visiting in – the wonder and awe one could always see from the children - right there from the glass windows’ panorama. The handsome barista always made the same chamomile honey-milk tea for her – the memory so vivid she could taste it. She would’ve bought the place if not for the scrupulous baroness that owned the establishment. Now all it has to show for it is the wooden road sign half-buried sideways in pebbles and rocks.

As she turns from the sight, there she sees – beneath the ivory spire of Canterlot Castle a picture. A picture straight from the depths of Tartarus.

A morbid congregation of the dead – deceased lay row by row, shoulder to shoulder, numbering in the hundreds covering around the entire span of Canterlot Circle. Its ruined, defamed, once beautiful fountain now a heap of ivory rocks - a twisted totem of what was once grand Canterlot. Now its corpse lie defiantly for all to see.

She turns away from the sight. There is no more for her to see. She refuse to see more.

“I didn’t think it was this horrible…” Almost out of courtesy, Rainbow broke the silence. 

The guard snaps back “Of course you don’t, you live in Ponyville. This whole place is carnage, and we’re spread thin over here just trying to fix what we can. Those of us left in the town pitched in together to help everypony but there’s not a lot of us left to get our lives back… well, not a lot who haven’t left town, of course”

“One monster did all this?” 

Her voice croaked, Rarity forced the question from beet red eyes.

“Aye. Saw it myself. It was spitting fire and explosions all over the place. Killed most of my friends... Nopony could do anything…”

“We got a kid here!” 

They turn to see a mare and a stallion pull a young filly from the rubble nearby. The two lift her up from the rocks and lay her gently on the cold hard cement “Sweet Celestia, is she alive?”

One pony feels her pulse as the other pat her down, feeling for broken bones or bleeding. The mare presses her ear over the filly’s chest. They watch in silence. 

She rise, the hope in her eyes fades as she shakes her head to her companion.

“That monster’s gonna pay” the want of retribution is clear in the guardsman’s voice “How could Celestia let this happen to us?”

“This ain’t Celestia’s fault.” Applejack interrupted “Don’t lose sight of what happened, it’s the monster that did all this”

“Well she didn’t stop it” 

He point his hoof at the town around them “And neither did you. Where was the ‘Elements of Harmony’ when all this happened?”

“We’re sorry.”

Rarity said it without thinking, but it’s truly what she felt.

The guardsman paused at her, watching her in long pacified silence. He shrugged as if he seemingly made a decision.

“Well… it’s not going to bring our friends and families back but whatever” He points to Canterlot Castle in the distance “You wanted to see the princess, right? You’re gonna have to walk through the plaza. It’s rancid, but there’s nowhere else we could put everypony”

“Thank you, sir. When we come back we’ll ask more ponies to help here”

“Whatever.” 

He turns back to the station gates, leaving them alone with their thoughts. Their eyes turn by themselves towards the distance, beyond the throes of the dead laying in the city before them.

Canterlot Circle is a mile-wide roundabout, circling all the streets of the city and is the way through to everywhere. It is literally the center of Canterlot. One cannot go from one street to another without passing through the plaza – including the uphill road to the castle. At the center of it is a beautiful mile-high fountain, a testament of Canterlot’s unabashed opulence. The waters spouting from the horns held by cherubs would sparkle like magic in daylight, and in the evening brings a soothing calm that balms the passing mare, lightening even the tiniest burden of the day.

Canterlot Circle is a grand display of the exuberance of Canterlot itself. For Rarity, it’s what sets it apart from the rest of Equestria. Canterlot had life in it like nowhere else.

It is plain cruelty that now it lies like an open morgue, an open casket of a hundred dead laying in sleep sprawled around the upturned, shattered fountain. Torn, as it seem, simply by malice. As if the monster purposely went out of its way to cruelly destroy something so beautiful. The spout looked as if it would bathe blood if it did.

As they near the scene the smell of corpses immediately gag in her throat – the smell of dead rotting meat, of rats carrying pestilence and maggots crawling underneath flesh like poison - their fumes crawl her throat in an instant. She gags. She realizes then, if not the sight, it would take a hundred years to forget this smell.

“… Sweet Celestia…” Her eyelids bite through the tears flowing askance. She doesn’t need to see this. She doesn’t need to see this.

“We can’t walk around them, there’s too many… …We have to go through…”

From her tone, she realized that Rainbow had a mind of flying through, but much to her surprise she felt a hoof grabbing hold of hers.

“We got you, Rarity. Let’s go”

Applejack’s calm voice reassures her. Calms her, even. Then she felt shame. Behold, the mare who lost her own home and family now embracing her, thinking only of her pain. She look up to her sad emerald eyes, then to the hoof wiping her tear away. She feels it rest on her back, motioning her to move on but with her own pace. 

She turns back to the mares, the stallions, and the little fillies and colts numbering in the thousands lying next to each other, on top of each other, filling the entire square. Pale, the color flushed from daresay even their blood - flies and corpse worms swarm on the eyes and mouths on those that still have them. 

The vultures ignore them as they pass, feasting on hooves, tearing indescribable chunks from ribs. Maggots swarm, slithering their disgusting white pods consuming the dead flesh unashamed before daylight.

But nothing more terrifying than the squeaking. The squeaking of the giant rats, most infernal sounds screaming in gluttony,  hooked-pronged teeth raised in satiety – abominations in broad daylight. All of them. Their beady eyes stare back, daring her to over-step their territory.

“Don’t look, Rarity” 

She grabs Applejack by her shoulder, burying her head in her bosom “Rats, Applejack! …there’s so many…”

“I hear ya… I hear ya…” Applejack embrace her in a motion to comfort her, leading them away but the farmer pony’s eyes follow the mare with the rainbow mane in front – hunched, quiet, and walking a slow and deliberate pace. Her mind also must be contemplating on how one monster alone could do all these things.

Rainbow stops and turn to a particular sight. Her own eyes follow – they spot a stallion, bent over and clutching one of the bodies, weeping. His face crunched tight, his eyes flushed deep bloody pink failingly fighting back the tears carelessly flowing. The pale viridian mare in his hooves stare back at him without the color hers once had. 

He’s mumbling something to her, but they’re too far away to hear. 

They watch him without a word.





“If I could get a word in, I’d like to say that I really appreciate this opportunity to be actually able to finish this one way or another. I mean, say what you want about comic book writers but at least THEY got a schedule. No matter how crappy or mediocre a job some of them are doing, at least they get the story moving along. Give the people something to actually look forward to at least, right? A good work ethic is a valuable thing to have.

People like to say ‘Quality over Quantity’ but people don’t usually wait every two years for their next batch of escapist gore porn to take them away from reality. No, No - they only need to wait for a week between episodes of The Walking Dead… Is the Walking Dead still on? 

Did this story outlive the Walking Dead?? There’s a joke there somewhere, but it’s too depressing to mention.

Maybe if the guy writing this finally gets his act together then maybe – MAAYBE – he would actually have an INCH of a shot to getting a light-year’s close on his dream to becoming an actual legitimate writer and not just some hack stealing jokes from 2010.

Definitely not with this proofreading too. Would it kill ya to get a proofreader for shit? Should I help? – Who do I have to kill for that? Stay tuned – Coming soon – Deadpool Kills the Writers Studio

Now I know what you’re thinking: Woo~ Deadpool with a stick up his ass, complaining about some nerd’s My Little Pony fanfiction. So edgy! We should call you Edgepool, make you more relatable with your 12 year old target audiences.

Just let me say this… wouldn’t you like to see this story finally wrap up too?”

Deadpool stood on heel before the massive slope overlooking Ponyville, the night sky covering the straw-thatched homes spanning rows and rows on end before him almost give it a tone of finality. The final chapter of the hack writer’s run - a long-deserved fitting death that no one will see. 

Ugh, this whole chapter is a trudge. It’s been eight thousand words more or less, stop with the depressing similes already! Liven it up for once.

“Speaking of wrapping up, it’s about time I finally set foot in this town… Huh. Place looks bigger than in the crystal ball”

A gay ways away there laid a bed spread of tents (try saying that ten times in a row!) like the circus went in town and forgot to pack their shit. His eyes scanned the horizon until they land on the oh-so distinct Carousel Boutique standing apart from the other tents. For one thing, distinct because all the other tents are just palette swaps of the same generic tent. Another small detail is that the other tents didn’t have a huge-ass carousel lying on top. 

That’s all it needs really, to adequately describe for the reader the domicile so it would appear justifiably immersive in their own world-building imagination. It’s a tent with a merry-go-round on top. What else needs to be said?

What is that? That doesn’t look safe to live in. Deadpool’s no boy scout but he doesn’t think this is apt camping protocol. Oh. Now that he looked again, it isn’t a tent at all but a house made to look like a tent with a carousel built on top. Fancy, he guess… but why?

“Hmm. Isn’t it hilarious how I only work in the dark now? Did I turn into a vampire? Stay tuned for the next fan fiction nobody asked for: Deadpool kills the Twilight Universe!” 

The dirt trudged against his foot as he walked down the field’s green grassy knolls. “That joke would be so funny if I said it back in 2013. If somebody else wrote this story, this would have been finished within a week and this joke would still be relevant”

[[ You’re acting pretty angsty-pantsy for someone who just killed the princess. ]] Creamypasta Pie materialized beside him [[ You should focus on the bright side you know! ]]

“Is it weird that I think it’s cruel irony that you’re the one cheering me up?”

[[ This is it! The moment of truth! Finally – FINALLY – A main character getting KILLED!! ]]

“Yeah. Hey, ease up--”

[[ AAAA!!! I’m so EXCITED! ]] she bounced up and around him [[ AAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!! How will she die How will SHE DIE?! Sword to the throat? Gun between the eyes? GORRY ANND BRRUUTAL?? Oooh-OOOH! Is it going to be slow and agonizing? Quick and messy? What monologue will you be saying this time?-- ]]

“You’ll get the spectacle you want, just calm down.” He holds Pinkie down “We both know it’s a foregone conclusion but as they say, don’t count your chickens before they hatch.” 

[[ What are you talking about? Aren’t you EXCITED?! …don’t tell me you’re backing out now, or something ]]

“What? Of course not!” He took a deep breath “I just… want to be ready for this moment…”

He gripped the hilt of the katana, unsheathing it with a paced purpose. He stared a while to the reflection looking back. He’s seen him before – there’s a familiar sort of calm, disquiet look about him. His eyes staring back betray the path he’s seen and determined on going. A man with a silent gratefulness for knowing his purpose, the task that completes him. 

The work only he can do.

[[ You got this Wade! You killed Discord (sort of) and Princess Luna – This is NOTHING! ]]

“Listen. No offense, but I don’t need pep talk for killing Fluttershy. Can you leave me alone?”

[[ Why are you so grouchy!? ]] She cross her hooves together [[ Hmmph! Fine, see you ]] black smoke dissipate into air as she vanished from sight.

The dirt muffled the sound of his footsteps until he stopped an arm’s reach away from the purple double-doors of the boutique. His palm pushed the door open, the winches creaked quietly as it swing inward. 

Tens of pony mannequins greeted him, along with oval mirrors and costume racks circling the entire room like a dressing room stage. With the subtle lighting the moon casting from behind, it looked like this place would make a good Silent Hill game. Note to self: Destroy a certain video game company if have time. Kojima, Guillermo del toro, one day you will be avenged. Death Stranding wasn’t exactly what we’re looking for. 

The air chilled at the sound of his steps crashing and reverberating throughout the woodwork floor, each step coming closer and closer to the upward stairs. He could almost feel his quarry choking within his actual grasp – like something else you would be choking with your grasp, he is coming. I mean close. Close to his quarry.

Now the work is finally starting.

“Not if I have anything to say about it”

Deadpool spun to his back, leaping to the direction of the voice but finds no one.

Who was that?

“You can’t hide from me, Deadpool...”

Viciously, he turned again. Nothing. Only the mannequins standing lifelessly look back.

Equally vicious, a wicked thought entered his mind. Oh my god… Are the voices back? No! Please! One is enough!

“You can’t see me, but I can see you. If you think I’m just going to let you kill anypony else after what happened with Luna, then you’re in way over your head.”

As he listened he noted that the voice sounded familiar, enough that he knew it wasn’t one of his. Thankfully.

“Who the fuck…”

“Ha! You really don’t know do you? Well too bad--”

“-No, I know who you are – that counterfeit dragon something I killed a while ago - it’s just… you gave me your name and I can’t quite remember it, it’s hard keeping up with all these animals I killed. I can’t be expected to—“

“DISCORD!” the voice roared, booming within the walls of the boutique “It’s Discord, you lout! Don’t you dare forget!”

“Discord the lout. I get it”

“You never killed me, you fool. Annoyed me a little bit, MAYBE. Now it’s time to take my revenge for all that you did!”

“… Is that so? ...” 

Deadpool spun, his eyes on the lookout in the darkness for any sign of the presence “What are you gonna do, disembodied voice in the darkness, haunt me for the rest of my life? Real clever - Like I never had voices in my head before. I ain’t scared of voices!”

“… No…”

He almost tripped as the world around him seem to twist and bend, spinning as darkness rise from the ground.

“But that’s not such a bad idea.”

His legs give out as he landed with his palms pushing against invisible floor. The ground – no, the world - stretched infinitely black, like outer space expanding into nothingness. The silence rang in his ears.

“The fuck is going on around he-“

He choked on that sentence as a glowing spectre emerged from the abyss, her silvery features taking form as she approach. A shining white vessel adorned with a robe, the color of midnight flowing and sheening over it. The head hooded and out of sight until he sees them – her empty eye lobes, boring right through his being...

“Death?”

With a blink she was gone, leaving him perpetually alone in the infinitely black void. What was that? - What he saw in those invisible eyes? 

Sadness?

Fear?

“Death? Ha ha! No. Killing you would be too good! Ha ha ha!!”

The dragon laughed wretchedly as it fades in from the abyss. Its serpentine form about a three men tall steadily towered over him. A snarl plastered proudly over its massively ugly visage only a blind mother could love “After what you did to ME? To EVERYPONY? You think I’m going to just KILL you? Ha! Ahaha! HAHAHA!”

His laugh was confusingly senseless, contagious even, like laughing almost only for the sake of laughing. A little sad, but shock can change a guy.

“And what in Equestria was I thinking? LASER BEAMS?! HA! Laser Beams! Seriously! And I got all the unicorn guards to do it! I had all this time to figure out why and I still can’t figure out what came over me, even if I’ve never really been in a serious fight. What was… what was that about?”

Closer he came slithering, his long and serpentine torso circle Deadpool at a slowly shortening reach. The serpent’s body moved to bind him.

“I have to say Deadpool, YOU are something else… I thought I understood what you are but it seems even I can be shown a new trick or two” he kept circling, inching and inching slowly to pounce upon him “and that nasty business over there with Luna – I say, if we keep letting you be you might actually be able to kill us.”

A sneer crept its way deliberately onto Deadpool’s face. This is pitiful. This poor thing thinks it knows everything, thinks it actually has a chance.

“You truly are irredeemable… funny thing is, I think she would still let you be her friend if you try it. Fortunately for all of us, she won’t be able to give you the chance”

The void shifts as the swirling form of the draconequus around him disappeared in a trace of dust. A kaleidoscope of colors swept the horizon as the gargantuan form of the dragon loom over him. Tall as a hundred men, its massive head looked down on him in utter disdain like a drive-in Godzilla movie. Go ask your parents what a drive-in is if you don’t know.

“You’ll never get the chance to kill Fluttershy BUT – listen to this - I still won’t kill you! You know why? Because I’ll be taking your MIND…” 

The dragon lowered his head within inches to Deadpool. Heh. His own reflection smirked back from its gigantic eyes, gracing the most contemptuous smile ever to appear on the face looking back.

“Look at you… trembling with fear, staring through me with those eyes that don’t understand. You have no idea what’s going to happen, do you?”

Ha!  Funny. He was just thinking the same thing.

“…”

Ha. Aha ha! Take my MIND? How could he - haha! HA HA HA!!

“What in-“

“HAHAHA! AAAH-HAHAHAHAHA!!”

“WHAT are you laughing about you mad-“

“AAAAHH-HAHAHAHA! YOU –HAHA! Stupid bastard!”

“What IS so funny?!”

“AAHAHAHA!!! …You – HA - have NO idea what’s going to happen, DO YOU?”

“WHAT?!”

“Oh god, this is just - … this is classic!”

“Deadpool! I have the upper hand here! With just a snap of my finger your mind will CEASE to exist! You’ll be lying and drooling on the floor for the rest of your life, staring through the window of your eyes TRAPPED in a body that will never MOVE! Babbling and barely able to form anything for days on end – YOUR DAYS ARE OVER! Do you understand!?”

He sneered at the delirious dragon, almost felt sorry for the poor poor idiot “You poor son of a bitch... This is just NOT your day!” he raised his hands to his side, gesturing to him “first you get burned, then you get eviscerated, flattened, then your ghost is forced to see how I’m going to kill the rest of your friends but…” 

He shook his head, all too eager reveal the trap that was already set in the beginning “You should’ve enjoyed your afterlife and maybe spent it with forty-two virgins instead of throwing it all away for some payback”

The cold abyss swallowed the lights around them, engulfing them whole as Deadpool disappeared like a phantom. Discord turn to the darkness, spun around as he search but seeing nothing but shadow. 

“What’s going on?! Who—“

“Inside my mind is the last place you would want to be”

He turn as the voice travel from everywhere and around him, echoing through invisible walls.

“You’re not the first, but it’ll always be the same... You people think you got me figured out, but you DON’T. You never will, and that’s a real sad thing.”

You see me kill people. Make the usual jokes. Fantasize yourself in my situation and maybe you’d think to yourself you know how the Deadpool tick.

The problem with that buddy, is you don’t. You can’t think like me, because my head doesn’t work like yours do. Not for a long time. Voices come and voices go, you see it and you just think I’m crazy but that’s not even cutting it.

I don’t even know how I think. I had two guys with me for a long time – not one - and they’re gone now.

“You wanna know why?”

{{ Because of me }}

The cold, invisible air dragged Discord down and he fall through space, landing on cold dirt floor. 

He gets up. The wind blow icy sheer cold throughout the darkness. His eyes darted about but see nothing but shadow.

“What happened? What’s happening to me?”

He turned as light from the sun peer through the edge of the world. The blackness slowly lifted against the dawn, crimson light slowly and slowly rising from all sides of the endless horizon.

Underneath the dawn light, he saw them - A million shadows flooding the edge of the world supersede the rising light, flowing like an incoming tide of ants. The sun rose in a fiery orange like fires from the pit of hell. The scream of hornets echoed from the distance as the running shadows form bodies - a million men, running closer and closer and closer…

“What… in Equestria?”

{{ Funny you should mention making me lose my mind… as it turns out, I’ll actually be eating yours }}

“NO!”

Discord used his magic to escape Deadpool’s mind - but it doesn’t work! He flies upward, kicking the dirt onto the sprawling viridian sky. The wind blows true against him but as he look down, he sees the ground catching up to him! Like the world is EXPANDING, growing in a surreal speed to match his altitude – WHAT?! – He flies faster, but the earth keeps growing – a supergiant rising and rising to embrace him.

“WHAT?! NO! What’s going--?!”

“-rrRRRHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHH!!!!” The screams of a thousand hornets morph into raving and maniacal rage and evil. All around him the monsters come in close, baring their fangs and howling like hungry beasts. Masks red and black, their bodies corpse-like and revolting, their eyes wild with hunger, they swarm over the land. Pouring through supernova like an endless sea.

Amidst the ringing, within his mind he hears him speak

{{ Hey Discord, I always wanted to ask… how does it feel? To let down your only friend in the world? }}

“NO!! Stay back!”

{{ Shame I had to kill you first. I would’ve wanted to ask that after I kill her. }}

The mob close in, pulling Discord to the ground “STOP--!! AAAA--!!” their monstrous claws drag and tear through his chest, through his arms, through him - their teeth crunching the bones under his skin “—GET AWAY--!” a claw pluck his eye, eating the flesh-trail from his eyeball “AAAAHHHHH!!!” their teeth gnash at his throat, punching through his neck, ripping apart the stretching vertebrae from the cavity – gurgling his words into nothing. His blood spurt like a geyser, fountaining the droves clawing through and consuming the flesh inside. Their nails dig in and pull apart the fur covering his chest, exposing the pulsing flesh beneath, they feed.

Before the world fade into the blackness he hears it - the last few words left to hear.

{{ But somehow… I think I’ll know. After all in my mind, all you can do is scream }}

Just like me.

Deadpool’s eyes opened, staring upward at the wooden ceiling. His eyes on the fine details of the woodwork, the evening light tracing down the ceiling.

He sits up, staring at the staircase towards Rarity’s bedroom.

“What happened?”

{{ Don’t worry about him. You won’t see him anymore }}

He stands, cupping the stiff feeling inside his head. His hands nursing the sensation of a lingering pain. “Head feels empty somehow…”

{{ It’s nothing. I was just hungry }}

Heavy hoofsteps slowly ascended to her quiet retreat that is the lovely room of her good friend Rarity, only made empty by her presence.

As the monster's steps slowly and slowly amplify, the wind blew on the tree suffering her sight. The leaves waved her goodbye as she wait for the creature to come in. 

The door creaked open behind her. Her attention turned to the presence she could feel standing at the door of the room.

“Hello Fluttershy”

She found her hooves slowly making her stand up and slowly turning to face the monster who made her stronger. 

Whatever happens tonight, she lives on. One way or another.

“Hello Deadpool”





Sunset and Twilight pass through the massive double doors of Princess Celestia’s throne room. The clean white marble walls seem hideous to Sunset. Without spark. 

She can smell it, like the pearl white paint coat is still awash with blood that will always stain. Memories can never cleanse. It’s like she was here when it happened.

Princess Celestia sits upon her throne like a witch, casting a particular malevolence in her eyes staring down them in indifference. Her nose turning up, as it appears, at the mere sight of their approach. 

They do not feel welcome.

She doesn’t remember Celestia being this… unnerving. She turns to Twilight and stared in amazement at the terror in her eyes, like she did a wrong that would take a century to forgive. What happened between these two? Was her request to see the Princess out of turn? Does the princess suspect even them? 

“Twilight.”

She jolt at the mention of her name, almost leaping from the white tiled floor.

“So what has transpired of your interrogation?”

Her eyes turn to Sunset, then back to the princess. She clears her throat, feeling all the eyes staring straight-dead center at her, waiting for an answer. 

Slowly her lips part “… She denied any involvement… When we presented the evidence, she looked like she truly wasn’t involved with any of it and… showed no recognition of the pictures...”

The princess kept unmoved.

“T-The-Ah – Our bluffs didn’t work either and Pinkie didn’t look like she’s putting up an act. It really does appear that she’s i-innocent… based from the questions w-“

She swallow her words beneath the princess’ unmoving glare. 

“-based from the questions we a-asked…” 

Her head bows low, crouching her neck until her muzzle could touch the floor. Sunset mimicked the motion when she saw what she’s doing.

“… but that is not all… …” 

The princess blinks, letting the seconds pass by in silence. The dread creeping up within Twilight kept her from raising her head from the ground.

“My theory is that Pinkie Pie is being framed. The reason it worked so well is that we don’t truly know what Pinkie Pie is capable of in the first place. I looked into her eyes and I SWEAR she didn’t have it in her to do any of those things… The way she’s been with us - that’s not the way a pony who’d betray her friends act.”

She continued “With the help of Sunset, we’ve determined that the monster is not human as I originally thought. This led me to the theory that the monster – Deadpool – is from an alternate universe.”

Her eyes widen at what she just heard. 

Did she hear that right? Is this a joke?

She’s too afraid to look at the princess to watch her speak:

“You promised me you would get me answers as long as I allowed you to handle your friend. I have let you handle it your way, but what you have for me… are bluffs, theories, and a conspiracy.”

She can smell the blood rising to her nostrils at every word the princess spoke.

“You… must forgive me, Twilight. I lost my only sister last night. As you can see, I am very upset. I am sorry.”

There’s more surprise in her than calm from that sudden apology. Was that permission to continue?

“Please hear me out.” Twilight choked “I know it sounds far-fetched but the theory of alternate universes perfectly explains everything.” 

She clears her throat before continuing “-As we know the theory of alternate universes is simple. Allow me to briefly explain – For example, suppose that a pony is travelling down a straight path and has come into a forked road-”

“I know what alternate universes are. Get to the point.”

The princess had an impatient snarl and lifted an eyebrow at her words. They rooted them to their spot. 

She’s never seen contempt from the princess before.

For the first time in her life, she truly fears Princess Celestia.

“A-A- Alternate U-Universes w-when applied to matter and time… m-means that there are potentially an infinite number of alternate universes. There’s one where everypony is born as a human - we know this to be true as me and Sunset here where able to cross over such a place.

After coming back from the other world and realizing this, I did my best to put it at the back of my mind and not even dare to think of it.

Deadpool – regardless of what he really is must have come from one of these universes. This explains why he can seemingly appear in and out of nowhere and ambush us, he must come from a world where creatures like him can do such a thing.”

She pause, waiting for a response from the princess. The princess stares on until she catch a twitch in her eye.

“Could this Deadpool have come from the same universe you and Sunset Shimmer came from?”

They give a quick glance at each other, their minds blank for only a moment. Was Celestia implicating them in some way?

“No. Deadpool looked human but Sunset confirmed that humans can’t do what… he does. They don’t regrow their heads and… … …”

She let her words trail off before the Princess asks again “So what does this have to do with what’s happening?”

“Deadpool that night said that none of us are real. That we’re all… characters. That we exist only to satisfy the ones that created us. Like in a storybook - everything is written by that story’s writer. Earlier I was thinking… is it possible that he’s telling the truth?”

The silence that followed is maddening. 

“What in the hell are you talking about?!” Sunset whispers “Are you trying to get us killed?!”

“Just listen to me” she then turns to the princess “It’s not too far off. We already confirmed that alternate universes exist and considering that what Deadpool said may be true can help us understand and stop him. That we are all just characters within a story written and that he’s killing everypony for it.”

The princess stares at her for a long while. An excruciatingly stomach-churning long while, until she speaks: 

“I’ve never heard anything more preposterous.” 

Silence. 

She thought for sure that the Princess would kill them herself then and there for such an outlandish theory but to her surprise, there’s a resigned look on Princess Celestia’s face. Almost defeated. 

“Fine. I’ll permit whatever line of thinking you suppose would assist the investigation. If you believe it would help us stop this monster...” 

The princess’ cast down eyes lingered on nothing until they shot up straight onto her “What do you make of this, Sunset?”

Her eyes lit up “Um. I don’t know. This went from scientific to philosophical”

“Alternate universes is in a way a scientific element itself, but fair enough” Twilight cut in to defend herself “Still supposing that it is true, does that make us and the alternate universes less real? And if we’re characters in a story, what exactly of our actions are determined to be decided by us alone instead of influenced or forced by our creator? Does our creator make the story or us?”

Twilight goes off on a tangent now that the Princess seems to be on their side again, although Sunset’s still not sure of what to say. 

“Now this went from philosophical to existential.”

“I realize that. I am merely thinking out loud.”

She feels obliged to humor Twilight, if anything just to break out from that tension earlier.

“Well, to answer your question I think I remember somewhere that a story is written not by the writer, but by the characters.”

“I guess that’s true.”

“Something to think about maybe, but I don’t think it really helps in our case. Besides, what kind of story would this be? A story where a monster kills everypony in Canterlot and everypony we know? What kind of… mentally disturbed person would make a story like that? What sort of… what sort of sick people would read such a thing?”

“Um... Let’s not get carried away, I’m merely ruminating on the possibility that we are really are characters within a story. I could mention the concept of the shadow from Jungian psychology but that’s an entirely different discussion.”

“And this isn’t? Isn’t this about trying to find a way to stop that monster from killing all of us? Why are we talking about alternate universes and… and writing class and psychology and shit?”

Twilight winces as she massages her temple with a hoof “My point is… If everything, including the words we’re speaking right now, is pre-ordained and decided by our ‘writer’ that means that all the suffering lately has been caused by our supposed ‘writer’ as well, is it not?

Deadpool says he’s killing everypony to spare them from this pre-ordained life – a life with no free will, so to speak. Regardless of how unbelievable it sounds and taking out our personal feelings on what he’s doing, doesn’t that also mean that our ‘writer’ also pre-ordained that? Deadpool must realize that even his act of aggression is pre-ordained – ‘written’ down - so why does he continue? Does he just enjoy killing everypony then?”

Sunset doesn’t see the point in continuing this discussion. She doesn’t even understand it. 

She relents, if only to humor Twilight. It’s certainly better than her moping “I don’t know. Maybe… maybe he believes that he’s a free agent. One way or another.”

“Exactly!” Twilight nods at her “Question is - what makes him believe that? This goes back to what you mentioned earlier where a story is written not by the writer, but by the characters.

If he believes that he’s a free agent then basically, using that concept, WE are the story, our creator is the ‘writer’, and Deadpool is the only character.”

What Twilight said sounded utterly incomprehensible that she thinks even the Princess didn’t understand her. 

“I think you lost me.”

“Okay. Where should I explain?”

“Actually, can we just change the topic? I just can’t wrap my head around that you seem to agree that we’re actually all characters in a story.”

“As far as the nature of existence is concerned, I have to agree that it’s possible.”

“Goddamn - with that reasoning anything is possible!” 

Doesn’t make us closer on stopping all this, she thought to herself.

Princess Celestia cuts in “I think what you were saying earlier… that if this is a story, and Deadpool believes that he’s acting on his own, and that what he is doing is not ‘written down’ by our ‘writer’ - even just by believing that - he’s actually the one who’s influencing our fates?”

“Yes. That’s exactly it.”

She can’t believe what she’s seeing. How are they making sense of this? How is the Princess also buying this?

“By acting in accordance to his belief that he’s a free agent, he’s become a pseudo-writer for this ‘story’.”

“That is absurd.”

Sunset can’t help but blurt out. Twilight looks at her without turning 

“Not if it’s true.”

There’s a finality in her tone that kept Sunset kept silent.

“Deadpool also mentioned creators meaning there are more than one. This means that there are other ‘stories’ that aren’t even close to us that exist - a potentially infinite number. Deadpool could have visited an unlimited number of these ‘stories’ as the only ‘character’”

The princess slinks back a little on her throne, contemplating the events of the past few days “So it all goes back to the alternate universe theorem?”

“Yes, but the true nature of everything that’s happening might not be explained by alternate universes alone. What if Deadpool really is accomplishing something by killing everypony?”

Silence. The thought doesn’t really sit in until Sunset asks “What do you mean by that?”

Twilight turns, her entire body facing her 

“Let me ask you - What’s one way to end a story?”

She’s not liking being put on the spotlight like this in front of the princess and having to come up with an answer but she goes ahead anyway 

“… A happy ending?”

“That’s correct, that’s one way. A bad ending too, yes? How about an ending where all the main characters die? Would you be able to continue writing a story when all the characters are dead?”

“Uh - I don’t know, I’m not a writer…” She’s not liking the way this goes. “Unless you make more characters I guess, but… I guess that’s one way to end a story too…”

“Yes. In a world where all the main characters are defined with their own personality, goals and motivations, the easiest way to end a story is to write all these characters off.”

“To kill them all.”

The sound of the double doors opening blasted off like an explosion, reverberating around the throne room.

“TWILIGHT!”

They all turn their attention to the blue pegasus marching towards them. The rage on her face only get more pronounced as she approach “You got some explaining to do!”

“Rainbow Dash? What are you-” two other ponies, a unicorn and earth pony peer out from the open doors and follow after her “What are you guys doing here?”

“That’s pretty obvious, right?” the pegasus continue darting towards her way, every step looking like an attempt to restrain from hitting her “You think we’ll just let you send Pinkie to prison in front of everypony without any explanation?!”

Twilight backs a bit but returned the scowl “She’s suspected of helping the monster. It was either me or the Princess who would’ve dragged her here.”

“Suspected?!” Rainbow Dash stopped short in front of her with an incredulous look on her face “SUSPECTED?! Pinkie’s been helping US stop the monster! What are you talking about!?!”

“You weren’t there, Rainbow! You weren’t there when Deadpool said that Pinkie’s been helping him right before he killed Princess Luna!”

Rainbow steps back, weakly like she was struck down 

“W-What… and you BELIEVED HIM?!” 

The words linger in the air as the expression on her face morphs even more accusingly.

“You BELIEVED every single thing that monster told to you - you didn’t figure he was LYING – you FORGET that Pinkie’s been out for days in the forest, trudging through blood and guts to find ANYTHING we could have on that monster?!” 

The two other ponies finally caught up behind Rainbow. The orange earth pony was about to reach out but Rainbow continued “You weren’t there when Pinkie stayed and scoured the forest for us – I WAS! – you weren’t there to see her get used to the smell and the sight of those innards splattered all over the forest that nopony wants to clean up!”

“What do you want me to do, Rainbow?! Applejack and Fluttershy’s families are dead and so is half of the ponies in Canterlot - and now Princess Luna! If the monster that did it said that Pinkie is helping him--!” 

She stops for a split second “You think it’s easy for me to take Pinkie and bring her here?! Do you have ANY IDEA how many ponies want to kill her right now?!”

“Oh then well, GREAT JOB on bringing all the ROYAL GUARDS getting them on surrounding the entire town - publicly declaring to EVERYPONY that Pinkie is SUSPECTED of helping the monster kill the princess, Discord, and the hundred others!”

Quiet. The air stops dead still with Twilight and Rainbow staring deathly onto each other, teetering on one more careless word - one more careless word to blow everything up.

“Enough.” 

Princess Celestia stands from her throne. 

Without thinking, Sunset grabs onto Twilight as the two other ponies grab onto Rainbow, separating them.

“You two are not to say another word before—“

-A cloud of smoke puffed in front of the princess as she spoke. 

They stop.

Their eyes turn to the brown ragged parchment that fell to the floor.

The horn on the princess glows, levitating and unrolling the slip in front of her eyes. The rest stare at the princess, her own eyes lingering on the parchment until she meet theirs. 

The paper turns. A single word written in splayed running red ink –

“HELP”





“Forgive me?”

His hand ran through the edge of the blade, his mutant reflection staring back at his downcast eyes. Contemplating.

His eyes turned back to her. Her expression grave but almost sympathetic, devoid of malice or fear.

He moved closer, towering within an inch of her. Her eyes locked straight onto his. The sadness in her eyes almost meant for his own damned existence. Was it pity?

His hands gripped the hilt of his sword. She blinks. A moment passed between them – an agreement in silence on what must be done. Perhaps, not an agreement. Maybe, acceptance.

He twist and bring the sword to his right, then he swings. The blade cut through the gaps between the gangling spines of her neck. 

Blood pours out in a line. Her sad eyes look back as the head slowly lop sideways, the hooves on her body giving out in unison.

She fall, littering the cold wooden floor excessively with the blood pooling from her headless stump - the color mixing with her yellow fur and her strawberry mane. 

“It’s done. She’s dead.”

[[ No fanfare or anything? ]]

His eyes turned back to the head on the floor. The blue in her irises dilate, looking like it is turning into a subtle gray…

“I’m not in the mood.”

The sound of someone’s breath catch his attention. He turns - a tiny dragon stood looking dumbstruck by the door, a small bag slung over its shoulders. It runs - its small pitter patters sounding off against the wooden floor.

“Son of a-“

[[ Get him! Quick! ]]

He chased after it, running through the door, sprinting down the spiraling stairs.

He pushed open the front door, slamming it outside. The moonlight shifts onto the dragon stumbling to the cold dirt. He pulls the pistol from its holster and aims down sight - his finger wrapped the trigger, his eye crossed through the iron sights.

He fires.

The dragon slips to the ground, dropping the bag slinging from its shoulders.

“AAAAHH!!”

It squirms - clutching its chest with its claws. Screaming through wheezing breaths.

“HHEEHLP!! ANYPONY!!”

As he approach its eyes shift at him like a madman, then to the hole pouring deep red blood from within. It turns to the bag it dropped and crawled towards it, rummaging inside. It took out a slip of paper, crumpling it.

“What the hell is that thing doing?”

He came closer, savoring the sound of its stifling sobbing as it squeeze its own body curling away from him. He loved it. Been a while since he heard the sounds of unbridled terror. 

Towering, he finally stood within a few steps from it. He reached down until it suddenly whirled and breathed a gout of fire!

“GHAAHH! What the fuck?!”

The embers spread around his mask, boiling the fabric and skin underneath. He took it off and threw it to the side, his eyes glaring onto the dragon making a run for it.

He aim and pulls the trigger. A single shot goes straight through its chest yet again, bringing it to its knees.

“AHH!!” It trips again, crawling on the grass sprayed with its blood “SOMEPONY! Please! …help … ahh…!” it shimmies on the dirt, its voice giving out like the breath leaking from the holes of its chest.

Deadpool closed in and stood over the writhing dragon, curling as it brings its claws to its heart. He placed his gun back to its holster.

“You know, you’re lucky. I’d be really pissed at what you did if I wasn’t already so goddamn ugly.”

His hand reached out to the hilt on his back, metal scraped against the sheath as he brought the blade before him. 

“-GCK!”

Its body stiffened as he drove the sword straight through its ears. 

“You’re Spike. Get it?”

A boot held down its head as he pulled out the sword clean-off. Its legs twitched one last time.

“Yeah you did”

His eyes turned to window lights flickering in the distance, their inhabitants slowly rising from their sleep. This dragon made quite a commotion – but not as much as he will.

His palm ran through the sheet of his blade, wiping off the blood clean from its frame. 

He grinned, satisfied. Eager. The long wait has ended. This time, it has finally begun.

The beginning of the end.





She sit, her head face down at the cold metal table before her, eyes staring at nothing, mind running through thousand random thoughts swirling on their own. Thoughts she can’t say. Thoughts she can’t understand. 

How could this have happened?

Her reflection stares back with the same mindless intensity. Baby blue eyes awash in pink pulsing whites look on. She is tired. It’s all she can understand. Nothing else makes any sense.

She wants to go home. She wants to hold Gummy and hug him. 

She doesn’t want to be here anymore.

Her gaze linger on until she sees something spill from her peripheral. Something black pooling on the table.

Her eyes dart in alarm – is that?! – she jolt to the sight in front of her – a crimson mare standing on the other end of the table.

Black hollow eyes look back from dripping maroon mane. Within, the flash of glowing red lights blinds.