An Angel's Happiness
“…And one cherry on top, just the way Angel likes it.” Fluttershy smiled down at the salad. Unlike the last time she’d attempted it, this one was the embodiment of perfection—down to the very last detail, or, in this case, cherry.
“I wonder where Angel could be.” The pegasus stepped away from the kitchen and began her search for the impatient pet she loved so much. This was the first time she’d been in the kitchen without his presence, which was usually signified with the thumping of his foot. While other ponies found this trait annoying, Fluttershy didn’t mind it; it was his way of expressing himself. It was when he wasn’t doing it that made her worry.
As the pegasus’ search proved fruitless, she began looking in the least likely of places. Under the bed? No. Playing with the other animals? Nope. Hiding in the chicken coop? Negative.
Fluttershy’s eyebrows drew together as she contemplated any other places he could be. It wasn’t like this was the first time he got out, but she was already fearing the worst. Angel Bunny had a habit of pushing her around, but he knew when enough was enough. In this case, if he didn’t come home within the next hour she could start freaking out.
But what if something terrible had happened to him? What if he couldn’t come home? Billions of different scenarios played through Fluttershy’s mind like a painfully vivid movie, each worse than the last.
The pegasus gulped and trotted toward one of the other animals she cared for. Harry the grizzly bear had been living in the Everfree Forest for a whole year before Fluttershy had come across him. The big guy looked scary, but underneath his tough exterior he was a real sweetheart.
“Harry?” At the sound of Fluttershy’s gentle voice, the bear stopped what he was doing and craned his neck backward. From what the pegasus could make out, he had started his own garden beside the chicken coop. “Have you seen Angel Bunny? I can’t find him anywhere.”
The animal’s face twisted in thought before he shook his head. To more clearly pronounce his point, he shrugged. Fluttershy’s eyes dropped to the ground, but she did her best not to sound disappointed. “Oh, okay… Sorry for bothering you.”
Harry went back to his task without a moment to waste. The most noticeable of his crop were carrots that appeared ready to be taken out. Fluttershy turned around and made her way back to her cottage. But one thought stopped the pegasus in her tracks.
“…Maybe Twilight knows where he is.” A blush lit up Fluttershy’s cheeks. Despite having held a steady relationship with the alicorn for a month she still felt nervous around her. It’d happened right after the coronation—Fluttershy couldn’t help but say that she and the rest of their friends all loved her. One thing led to another, and later that day Fluttershy ended up confessing what she really meant by that statement. Apparently Twilight held feelings for her as well and they considered themselves to be officially dating.
Plus, ever since the two started spending more time together so did Spike and Angel. The way they treated each other seemed to do a complete one-eighty after she left her pet in the care of the dragon. Back then, she’d been attending the Equestria Games with her friends in the Crystal Empire, which was a lot more fun than Fluttershy expected. At first she had been hesitant about leaving Angel in the care of someone else—it was very important to him that his tail got fluffed—but now she was glad she did.
“It wouldn’t hurt to go check. He might be playing with Spike…” Fluttershy said as she stretched her wings out. She hoped that Angel really was there. If he didn’t come home soon, his salad wouldn’t taste very good, and that would be such a waste. Especially considering how long it took her to make sure it was just right…
The pegasus leisurely took to the air and as she flew toward Twilight’s library, she made sure to keep an eye out in case she saw Angel somewhere in Ponyville. Despite having already come to the conclusion he wouldn’t be running around town, she continued combing the area with her observant eyes. Just as she’d figured, Angel Bunny was nowhere to be seen.
After a short trip, Fluttershy arrived at the library. She was excited and nervous and worried all at the same time. Her wings rustled against her fur. Her mind was occupied by thoughts of her treasured pet but her heart pounded for her beloved.
The pegasus took a deep breath before knocking at the door. From somewhere within, Twilight shouted, “Just a second!”
Just as she’d promised, the alicorn opened the door moments later. A wide smile overtook her features. “Oh! Hey, Fluttershy. You know you don’t have to knock, right?” A small giggle escaped her lips. Fluttershy scuffed her hooves against the ground, her cheeks reddening already.
“I know… It was just… Um… I didn’t want to bother you,” she finished. The heat in her face had yet to cool down, but Twilight didn’t seem to notice. She stepped back and held the door open.
“You don’t have to worry about that. My door is always open, remember?” Fluttershy only nodded in response before stepping inside. She hugged Twilight just before the alicorn closed the door.
“Have you seen Angel?” Fluttershy questioned as she let her gaze wander around the room. There was no sign of Spike.
“Hm…” Twilight brought a hoof up to her chin and tapped a few times. “I think I remember Spike saying something about playing a game of hide-and-seek with the other animals and Pinkie, but I was reading Etiquette Fit for a Princess and I wasn’t really paying attention…” she trailed off with a sheepish grin.
“It’s okay.” Fluttershy nuzzled her cheek. “Would it be alright for me to stay here with you until he comes back? I mean, I… um… kind of don’t have anything else to do since I already fed all the other animals.” Twilight’s eyes caught the light and Fluttershy was reminded of just how beautiful they were. She never knew just how many different shades of purple there were until she fell for Twilight. Often times she found herself getting lost in those lavender eyes, forgetting all but how lovely they were.
“Sure! I wouldn’t mind the extra company. Though, I hope my reading doesn’t bother you. Princess Celestia sent me all the books in the Canterlot archives regarding princesses and how one should act, and I really need to finish them so I can send them back as soon as possible.” Fluttershy found it sweet that her marefriend was working herself up over something like that. The pegasus shook her head to rid her mind of Twilight’s eyes.
“I don’t mind. Really.” Fluttershy let her gaze rest on Twilight’s face once more. She was telling the truth in more ways than one; she could sit still and do nothing for hours so long as Twilight was there. When the alicorn read a book, Fluttershy was content with watching her eyes scan the page. The best part was that she was always too wrapped up in her book to notice. Twilight was never as expressive as when she was reading. When she read something that didn’t make sense, she’d mutter it under her breath and her eyebrows would knit together. Fluttershy’s eyes would often drift down and watch her mouth form the words, and she’d let her mind wander.
“I’m glad.” Twilight said finally, pulling Fluttershy gently over to the sofa she’d recently added to the library.
Twilight hopped on first and pulled her book over. Fluttershy climbed on as well, though she snuggled up close to Twilight. That was another plus for being with the alicorn while she was reading; she could lay really close to her for a long period of time. Warmth radiated from Twilight and spread over to Fluttershy. Almost instinctively, the pegasus unfurled her wing and let it rest over Twilight’s back.
The bookworm was already in her own little world.
Fluttershy allowed herself to relax next to her love. Twilight’s horn lit up occasionally to flip the page, but the yellow pony didn’t pay attention to that. Out of all her friends, it could be argued that she was the most observant. Pinkie Pie would come close, but she was too random in that regard.
Fluttershy let out a contented sigh. She loved the feeling of Twilight so close to her, just under her wing. It was the closest she’d ever been with anypony. The sensation of her fur brushing against her love’s sent electricity through her body and fire in her veins. Even though they’d been together for a long time, Fluttershy still felt as strongly about Twilight as when she’d first met her. Twilight was Twilight, and that was all there was to it. She was as amazing and beautiful as they come.
However, that sense of peace and love didn’t last long. The entrance to the library slammed open all of a sudden, and Pinkie Pie rushed in.
“Twilight! Something terrible’s happened!” The earth pony flailed her forelegs around, her eyes wild. Fluttershy had never seen her pink friend so frightened before, and it scared her more than she wanted to admit.
“What’s wrong?” Twilight was on her hooves at once, adopting the leader attitude she used so often. Fluttershy’s side felt cold without the alicorn there, but she didn’t let that bother her. This seemed a lot more important.
“It’s Spike!” Fluttershy’s head snapped toward Twilight in alarm. The alicorn’s eyes had widened to the size of dinner plates, and Fluttershy felt her own heart break for her.
“What do you mean? What’s happened to him?” Twilight shouted toward Pinkie. The three of them were cantering in the direction of Ghastly Gorge, where Pinkie had said Spike was now.
“We were just playing hide-and-seek and I guess Spike tried to go there because he thought it was a good hiding spot. I didn’t know what to do so I had to tell you!”
“How could you let him do that?!” Twilight’s voice cracked on the last word, testament to how scared she really was. Fluttershy hadn’t seen her that freaked out since their first trip to the Crystal Empire, and even then it wasn’t this bad.
“I didn’t know he was gonna go there; it was Angel that told me!” Pinkie replied, sounding just as afraid as Twilight did. The pegasus didn’t trust herself to speak up, for fear that her heart would jump out of her throat.
“I’m going to teleport us there; this is taking too long.” Twilight panted out, drawing to a stop. Both Fluttershy and Pinkie did the same.
Fluttershy watched as Twilight’s horn lit up, and she wondered if it was a bad idea to teleport so far with three ponies. When Twilight had given Rarity wings, she’d been so drained. Wouldn’t this be a lot harder? “Um… Wouldn’t that be dangerous?”
Twilight shook her head, her horn still glowing. “We don’t have time. Ghastly Gorge is just as hazardous as the Everfree Forest. Besides, a simple teleportation spell shouldn’t be that hard.”
Fluttershy swallowed. Instead of saying something, she nuzzled Twilight’s cheek. Fluttershy trusted Twilight more than anything else in the whole wide world of Equestria, and she knew Twilight felt the same about her.
The alicorn seemed to understand this form of silent communication. She closed her eyes, and her horn lit up more. Fluttershy felt Twilight’s magic envelop her, and with a blink of an eye they were at Ghastly Gorge.
Twilight was panting, her body trying to make up for all the magic she’d just expended. Fluttershy made sure she was okay at once, but the alicorn shrugged her off.
“Where’s… Spike?” she said as a bead of sweat rolled down her face. They’d been transported a ways from the chasm, which looked just as unsafe as usual. Fluttershy wasn’t fazed by this; Angel and Spike’s well-being weighed on her mind, keeping her fear at bay. Well, fear for herself, anyway. However, there was no sign of Spike anywhere. “Pinkie, where is he? You… You said…”
“We were playing hide-and-seek so I don’t know where he could be! Angel followed his tracks here and told me to come find you, remember?”
Twilight pushed herself up, only to lose her balance and fall back down. She gritted her teeth. “Pinkie, go check over the edge. I… I can’t move yet.” The pink pony nodded and raced over. She poked her head over.
Pinkie gasped. “Oh no!”
“What?! What is it?” Twilight was trying to get to her hooves once again, but she still couldn’t keep herself upright. Luckily, Fluttershy was able to catch her before she fell.
“It’s a quarray eel! Spike, Angel, hold on!” Pinkie shouted before turning back toward the other two ponies. “Fluttershy, hurry!”
The pegasus flew over quickly, anxiety following her every flap of the way. She peered into the valley as soon as she was in range. She gasped just as loudly.
Angel Bunny and Spike were trying to climb up the chasm’s wall nearest to them. They were about halfway up, but a quarray eel was hot on their tail. It was small in comparison to its kind—probably a young adult—but if those two didn’t hurry, they’d be its lunch.
Fluttershy was so shocked by this image it didn’t occur to her that they could use some help.
“Fluttershy! You gotta use your wings!” Pinkie wailed. Her pupils had shrunk and her body was tense, as if prepared to lunge out at something at any moment.
This was all happening too fast. Fluttershy liked taking her time and doing things she was comfortable with, and this was neither of those. She hadn’t expected something this bad to happen—when they’d teleported, she’d prepared herself to find Spike and Angel hiding under a bush or something silly like that. Not fighting for their lives!
The crumbling of gravel caught Fluttershy’s attention. The part of the wall Angel was standing on had given way.
“Angel!” It was out of her mouth before it’d registered that he was falling—that something terrible was happening to someone she cared so deeply for. This was it; he was going to die…
Spike latched onto his paw and halted his descent. The only thing keeping Angel Bunny from an early grave was Spike.
Fluttershy was in the air, racing toward them though her mind was still reeling from what was happening. Her instincts had taken over, and not the ones that told her to fly away. Briefly it occurred to her that Twilight had called her name.
If time could slow down, Fluttershy would’ve wanted to record this moment and keep it locked away in the archive of her memories. Angel’s eyes had never shone so brightly, never conveyed so much emotion to her than at this instant.
But time wouldn’t slow down and Fluttershy couldn’t think straight. All she knew was that her Angel was in danger.
It didn’t take long for her to reach them. She scooped both of them up into her hooves and started making her way back to where the others were.
The quarray eel didn’t agree with her.
It used all its weight to push off the ground, its jaws snapping all the while. She felt a tug at her tail and remembered hearing Twilight scream her name before darkness took over.
Tick.
Tick.
Tick.
The rhythmic chiming of the clock marked each second with the same tone. Fluttershy was warm and comfortable, her wings pressing against the bed underneath of her. She’d never felt so at home in her whole life, like she hadn’t been able to relax for a long time. Everything was right and nothing could possibly go wrong.
Angel. The name resonated within her head, and a chord was struck. Something was wrong, terribly so.
Fluttershy’s eyes shot open and she pushed herself up immediately. It had to have just been a dream—she was in bed after all! She couldn’t have—Angel couldn’t—there was no way—
“Fluttershy?” Twilight’s voice interrupted the pegasus’ jumbled thoughts. The alicorn was sitting next to her bedside, her eyebrows drawn back in surprise. Fluttershy’s vision swam, but she didn’t even notice it. Her eyes were glued on Twilight.
“What happened? Where’s Angel?” Twilight’s eyes lowered to the ground. Fluttershy suddenly felt sick, like if she opened her mouth she wouldn’t be able to resist the urge to vomit.
“…I’m here for you.” she said finally. The pegasus tried to meet her eyes, but Twilight kept hers averted. Fluttershy felt an overwhelming sense of sadness overtake her, as if the world now rested squarely on her shoulders. She’d never felt so weighed down in all her life, and yet she’d never felt so detached.
Tears sprung to her eyes unbidden.
“What happened?” she asked again, more firm than before. Twilight made to stand up, but Fluttershy stopped her. She grabbed hold of her hoof. “Please, just tell me.”
The alicorn turned and met her eyes. Fluttershy hated the desperation in her voice and how scared she was, but more than that she hated how long it was taking Twilight to speak up. “…You fainted while you were flying, when the quarray eel had gotten hold of your tail. You were falling, and I’d just gotten to the edge of Ghastly Gorge. You, Spike and Angel were all descending quickly. I was able to charge up another teleportation spell, but you were all scattered…”
Fluttershy watched her marefriend closely, as if she were waiting for the punch-line of a really bad joke.
“I was only able to extend the magical field so far after using up all my magic a few minutes prior. You and Spike were falling faster than Angel, and I couldn’t just let you die. I tried to get all of you, but I couldn’t. I almost blacked out trying…”
Fluttershy swallowed before forcing her gaze away. She focused on her mirror on the other side of the room, but that only worsened her sorrow. She looked like a pony that’d just died on the inside, her eyes awfully dull. Twilight looked just as bad. “Angel’s… gone?”
The pegasus watched as the mirror-Twilight nodded gravely, her mane shifting with the movement. With that simple gesture, a black hole opened within her. It sucked up everything but Fluttershy’s misery and left her only with tears. Nothing seemed more important to her in that moment than Angel, the friend that’d been with her through thick and thin and only complained when he didn’t get what he wanted.
And he’d never get to try that perfect salad Fluttershy had slaved over.
The pegasus watched as her reflection burst into tears. They streamed down her face and dripped from her muzzle, but it did nothing to ease her sorrow. Twilight climbed onto her bed—something that would’ve made Fluttershy happy and excited in what seemed like a long time ago—and embraced her. The alicorn’s wings were big enough to wrap around both of them, providing comfort beyond that of a simple hug. Twilight rested her chin above Fluttershy’s head and quietly said:
“Let it all out. I’m here for you.”
Fluttershy’s hooves wrapped around Twilight and dug into her back almost painfully. Sobs clawed out of her throat as she pressed her muzzle against Twilight’s chest. It felt good to be within the grasp of her beloved, but for once in all the time they’d been dating Fluttershy wasn’t thinking about how wonderful she was. Angel was in her mind’s eye, and she could almost hear the sound of his foot hitting the ground rhythmically, a sign of his displeasure…
“D-did we… at least recover t-the body?” The words felt foreign to Fluttershy’s tongue, and she almost hadn’t been able to get them out. It wasn’t so much that she’d stuttered over her words, but that she couldn’t stop her hiccupping.
“…No. When you and Spike appeared beside us, it was too late.”
Fluttershy whimpered at this news. That meant they couldn’t have a proper burial…
“I’m so sorry, Fluttershy… I didn’t think anything like this would happen.” The pegasus’ only reply was a choked sob. She cried and cried until she had no tears left, and even then she continued to cry. It was the most she’d ever bawled in all her life, but it still didn’t feel like it was enough.
Oh, Angel… How could I have let this happen?
After a long time, Fluttershy pushed away from Twilight. Her hooves rested on the alicorn’s chest. “I… I’d really like to be alone, please.”
Twilight’s eyebrows shot up. “What? Why?”
Fluttershy averted her gaze. If she made eye contact with Twilight again, she wasn’t sure she’d be able to keep herself from bursting into tears once again. “…Please,” she repeated meekly.
Twilight bit her lip, but after a while she nodded. She leaned over and nuzzled Fluttershy’s cheek. “…Okay. If you really want me to go, I will.”
The alicorn waited a few more minutes, perhaps for some sort of response, but when none came she stood up and trotted toward the door. With one last prolonged glance at her marefriend, Twilight left.
As the door closed, Fluttershy let her shoulders drop. Fresh tears sprung to her eyes. She knew Twilight cared about her and that she could always rely on her, but at the same time she wanted to think everything over by herself. Besides, she didn’t want Twilight to see her cry for so long. That would be a bother to Twilight.
“Oh, what did Angel do to deserve something like this…? He’s never done a single bad thing in all his life.” Fluttershy buried her muzzle underneath her pillow, finding comfort in the darkness. She’d failed as Angel’s caretaker, so she had to be punished. She wasn’t qualified to take care of all the animals. She didn’t deserve to have friends at all, much less a marefriend.
The only thing Fluttershy could hear was her own whimpering and the accusing thoughts in her head. She was a monster…
Fluttershy continued to doubt her worth until sleep claimed her once again with dreams she felt she didn’t deserve.
When Fluttershy awoke again, the sun had just risen. It was a new day—the one day anniversary of Angel’s death.
With a heavy heart, the pegasus slowly drew herself out of bed. A cursory glance at her mirror dampened her spirits even more. Her eyes were red and swollen, her hair a mess, and her fur and feathers were disheveled more than she cared to admit. But she knew she had to get up; the other animals she cared for would be gaining their appetite right about now, and she did have an obligation to them.
Even if Angel was gone.
Fluttershy tried to force that thought out of her mind as she trotted down the stairs. She told herself he wasn’t actually gone and that he was just playing with friends outside. Somehow, that made her feel better. Just a little.
While finishing up all the animals’ meals, Fluttershy noticed their quiet behavior. Each critter hadn’t so much as squeaked and only watched her with sad eyes. Maybe they understood. They were such considerate creatures, Fluttershy knew, and she loved them for that.
She managed a small smile—which looked more like a twisted grimace—and told them she’d be okay. The pegasus wasn’t so sure about that, but she didn’t want them to worry about her. If she had to suffer, she didn’t want to drag anyone else with her. That went for Twilight, too.
“Here you go,” Fluttershy said as she gave the last animal his meal—a squirrel with an acorn. Satisfied with this small victory of breakfast, the pegasus turned back to the kitchen, intent on cleaning up.
Life had other plans.
Sitting on the counter exactly where she’d left it the day before was Angel’s salad. Even though it was a day old, it still looked both parts fresh and edible. Fluttershy was bombarded with so much emotion she almost fell over. Her tears were renewed—proof of how much of a crybaby she was. Unlike before, resentment swelled within her. Not only for herself, not only for that quarray eel, but for everyone. It wasn’t fair. Why did it have to be Angel? He was an angel, but that didn’t mean he had to die.
Why didn’t Twilight just save Angel and Spike? Twilight had the power to save him, but instead she let him fall to his death. How was that fair? She was a princess, but that didn’t mean she could just decide who got to survive and who didn’t! And Spike—he’d wandered off to Ghastly Gorge all by himself. If it weren’t for him wanting to find a good hiding spot, Angel would still be around. They would’ve still been playing. Pinkie should’ve been paying more attention…
“Fluttershy?”
This isn’t a good time… Fluttershy thought at once, not wanting to face Twilight so soon. Especially when she was thinking such terrible thoughts about her friends.
“I’m sorry for intruding, but all the animals look like they’ve just seen ghosts…” Twilight stepped closer, causing Fluttershy to stiffen. “I know you wanted to be alone, but I couldn’t just leave you here all by yourself for so long. I want to help you. I know you'd be there for me if had been… if it had been Spike.”
The pegasus remained silent. Her eyes, still blurry, lingered on Angel’s untouched salad. The cherry sat mockingly atop it, enticingly shiny.
“…Fluttershy?” Twilight said again, now next to her. She reached out and rested her hoof on the pegasus’ back, just between the wings.
Something snapped.
Whatever it was, it felt like an indescribable rage had suddenly burned into life within her chest. Fluttershy jumped up onto her hooves, her wings outright, and her eyes were on Twilight. Flaming eyes, prickling with intense heat and blame—not entirely aimed at Twilight, but on the world.
“Don’t you understand?!” the flame within her exclaimed. Emotion was thick in her voice and expression. All reason within her had retreated to the back of her mind, leaving no trace.
Twilight’s mouth formed an “O” and her eyes widened. Fluttershy had never shouted directly at her, much less with such a mean look on her face. She shrunk back at this prospect, her forelegs pressed into her chest as if she’d been burned.
“This isn’t something that can just be fixed or solved like your science equations! Angel’s gone forever and you’re acting like nothing’s wrong—like—like he’s not important!” Fluttershy’s tail twitched during her rant. “You could’ve saved him, but instead you saved a silly old pony like me! Why?!”
Twilight flinched. “There wasn’t any time to think about it. It was a split-second reaction and I instinctively—“
“You saved me and Spike because we’re more important to you than Angel, didn’t you? I can’t even look at you right now, I’m so mad…!”
Her gaze averted toward the doorframe, where she saw her critters watching anxiously. From her peripheral, Twilight’s countenance clearly showed hurt.
“We’re all doing our best to adapt, ‘Shy. I couldn’t save Angel because of his weight. He wasn't falling as fast as you two because of his light weight. If I aimed my teleportation spell at him, I wouldn’t have been able to get you or Spike.”
Those weren’t the right words to use.
Anger licked at her fur. She turned away from Twilight altogether, shaking. “Please, just go.” It came out a lot quieter than she intended, but her voice still quaked.
“But—”
“Go away!” she exclaimed louder, squeezing her eyes shut. It was silent for a moment, a scary second. Then, Twilight spoke quietly. Her face was tense and rigid, but a sigh wormed its way through her clenched teeth.
“…Okay. If that’s what you really want.” Fluttershy heard the clopping of hooves along the ground, and a little bit after that, the sound of her cottage door closing. At first, nothing happened.
Then, Fluttershy fell back on her haunches. She wondered what Angel would think about her now.
That was when the realization sunk in.
She’d just told Twilight to stay away from her and said really mean things. There was no way Twilight would forgive her for that. Despair weighed down on her, making her want to cry. She was turning into that mean version of Fluttershy again. She chased Twilight off just like she did Pinkie and Rarity a while ago. Even if she hadn’t said harsh things about Twilight’s talent, she’d still degraded her and said she didn’t care. That was probably even worse.
What did Twilight ever do wrong? She did her best, and here Fluttershy was yelling at her. The pegasus was the one that passed out at the smallest contact. If anyone deserved to be bellowed at, it was her.
When Fluttershy went back to Cloudsdale to see her father, who she hadn’t spoken with in years because of the divorce, Twilight was there for her. She’d been such a nervous wreck back then. And when she’d been lost in the Everfree Forest, Twilight saved her. Even if it was something small, like that time when Fluttershy had gotten a tooth pulled, Twilight had always been there.
And Fluttershy hadn’t. When Twilight was freaking out over Spike’s safety the other day, she barely said a word. That wasn’t fair at all.
Fluttershy felt something on her shoulder. When she looked over, it was her friend Hummingway. He was a small hummingbird, but you wouldn’t be able to tell by the way he carried himself. The other animals crowded around her, trying to show her their support. Some had even abandoned their meals.
“Why do you all still stay by my side? A mean pony like me should be banished and then imprisoned in the place she was banished…” A sniffle. “Here I am, quoting Twilight after telling her to leave me alone, and five minutes later, crying about it…” She reached a foreleg up and wiped her eyes with it.
The squirrel she’d fed last jumped onto her other shoulder and nuzzled her affectionately. Fluttershy said, “Oh, Cheeky… I know I should pull myself together, but I can’t.”
Hummingway flew in front of her and gestured his head toward the door. Fluttershy frowned. “I can’t go after Twilight… Didn’t you see how absolutely awful I was to her? She’ll never want to see me again.”
Cheeky tugged at her ear, gaining her attention for a second time. The squirrel chattered in its own language, to which the pegasus nodded lightly. “I know you guys miss Angel too.”
Then, Mr. Mousey scurried forward and tapped on Fluttershy’s hoof. He was the mouse that’d broken his leg a while ago. He pointed toward the door, tried to roar (which really came out as a squeak), and finally mimed a shovel motion.
“Harry the bear’s garden? Um… A hole?” The mouse shook his head before pretending to place something over the hole he’d just made. “…A grave?”
Mr. Mousey nodded rapidly, but Fluttershy let out a sigh. “We can’t… His body… We don’t have it.”
Hummingway shrugged as best he could while flying. Fluttershy figured that meant “It doesn’t matter.”
“It does matter.” Fluttershy’s voice trembled along with her body. She gently placed Cheeky on the ground before standing up. “I’m going to go take a nap… I don’t feel very good. Will you all be alright?”
Slowly, all the critters nodded. She knew they’d be able to take care of themselves for a little bit. So, the pegasus fluttered back upstairs despite having only left it not too long ago.
As she closed and locked the door, she let out another sigh. She never locked her door. If something bad happened, she wanted her animal friends to be able to get to her. But right now, all she wanted was to be alone and try and sort herself out so she didn’t hurt anypony else close to her.
It’d been a week. Fluttershy hadn’t left her cottage once, and no one had ventured inside. More importantly, that meant Twilight hadn’t come back.
Fluttershy had been nothing short of emotional. When walking around her home taking care of the animals, she’d randomly burst into tears and excuse herself to her room. Angel was on her mind in each of these instances, followed by Twilight. Mistakes she’d made were highlighted in her head. Why had she been so nasty to Angel before? She should’ve made him that salad more often, and fluffed out his tail whenever he wanted it.
And Twilight—oh, she should’ve kept her mouth shut! The second Twilight had walked away, Fluttershy should’ve gone after her and apologized. Right now, she could really use those big fluffy wings wrapped around her, close enough to hear her heartbeat…
Fluttershy swallowed, willing herself not to cry. She’d done that way too much lately, and Angel wouldn’t have wanted that. He would’ve pushed her out the door and made her go to the library, and would’ve told her to stop crying.
Maybe… it was time to let go. That was why she wanted time alone, right? If Fluttershy continued lamenting Angel Bunny’s death, then nothing would ever get better. Twilight would hate that pale imitation of her so much she’d never want to see her again. If she didn’t already hate her, that is.
Fluttershy recalled what Mr. Mousey had told her a few days ago, about making a grave. That would put him to rest… even if they didn’t have his body.
That must’ve been what he was trying to say all along. If only Fluttershy would have listened to him.
The pegasus made her way downstairs and out the door. Some of the critters were intrigued by the sudden change in behavior and followed her, but she didn’t mind that. Fluttershy trotted over to Harry the bear’s garden, the very same one she’d discovered the day Angel died.
“Harry…” Fluttershy began quietly. The bear, who had just been harvesting his crop, turned and made eye contact with her. His eyes softened, and an understanding seemed to pass between them.
Harry lifted a carrot from his basket and gave it to her. Fluttershy smiled. “Thank you, Harry… This means a lot.”
He gave her his own toothy grin, though it was devoid of any real happiness. Then, he turned back to his garden.
Fluttershy crossed her bridge and walked a few steps. When she found a suitable clearing, she got down on her knees. Behind her, a few of her critters had gathered: Cheeky, Hummingway, Mr. Mousey, and a couple of bunnies.
The pegasus looked around, until finally she found a rock suitable for a tombstone. She placed it in front of her, and etched a crude drawing of a rabbit with the words:
R.I.P.
Angel Bunny
995-1002 L.F.
Fluttershy gulped, but pushed her tears away. She wouldn’t cry now. She wanted her last memory of Angel to be a happy one. Even if he wasn’t here physically, Fluttershy knew he was there. Somehow.
She pressed her hooves into the ground in front of the makeshift tombstone and took a deep breath. Angel Bunny… I love you very much, and I’m sorry I couldn’t protect you. But I’m sure you’re in a better place now. Having fun, eating a cherry, because that’s when you’re happiest. I won’t forget you. I promise.
In place of a body, Fluttershy buried her sorrow. She felt a twinge of grief, but happiness accompanied it. The pegasus placed the carrot Harry had given her on the ground, in memory of Angel’s favorite vegetable.
Both Cheeky and Hummingway made their way to the grave with a bouquet of flowers they’d just collected. Warmth collected in Fluttershy’s heart as she watched the critters pay their respects. Even Mr. Mousey shed a few tears.
Soon, the animals made their way back to their homes, but Fluttershy remained by Angel’s memorial. She remembered all the good times they’d shared, the days he helped her out, and especially the day he fell. She didn’t remember much from back then, due to her blackout, but he’d been quite a hero. If he hadn’t followed Spike and told Pinkie to get help, the dragon could’ve died.
Hours passed until the sun was starting to set. Fluttershy couldn’t find it in her to leave, and could only stare at the monument blankly. Memories new and old replayed themselves behind her mind’s eye, leaving her with mixed emotions.
“…Fluttershy.”
Fluttershy’s ears perked and she whirled around. Twilight stood there with a book clutched to her chest, her eyes staring directly into Fluttershy’s soul. The pegasus stood up, meeting Twilight’s gaze. She was definitely a sight for sore eyes.
But Fluttershy’s words caught in her throat. An awkward silence followed, and she didn’t know what to say or do. She was all too familiar with these types of situations, but the fact it was with Twilight of all ponies made it even worse.
Finally, Twilight spoke up. “I’m sorry, Fluttershy… I shouldn’t have been so inconsiderate. I hope you can forgive me.”
Fluttershy blinked. Her eyebrows met when she realized Twilight had just apologized. “No, you didn’t do anything wrong. It’s me who should be sorry…”
She kicked her hoof at the ground.
The alicorn gave her a small smile, before nuzzling Fluttershy’s cheek. “It’s okay… I understand.” She pulled away before the pegasus could return it. “Here.” Twilight gave Fluttershy the book that she’d been cradling.
“What’s this?” she asked quietly. A glance down rewarded her with the title and cover photo. A drawing of Angel was clearly illustrated on the book. Fluttershy could tell Twilight had mended it herself.
“Read it, and come see me when you’re done.” When the pegasus looked up, Twilight had taken flight. Fluttershy watched until she disappeared from sight entirely, before looking back down at the book.
“An Angel’s Happiness, written by Twilight Sparkle.” She slowly turned the page. “To Fluttershy: My one and only love…” A blush lit up the pegasus’ features. “I hope this finds you in good health. I know you haven’t been feeling very well lately, and for good reason. But I just wanted you to know that Angel’s happy. That’s what this book is all about.”
Fluttershy turned the book over and inspected how many pages there were. It looked like a full-length novel, with at least two hundred pages. That was when the pegasus realized that this was probably what Twilight had been working on for the past week. Twilight hadn’t been avoiding her; no, she’d been writing a book this whole time. In honor of Angel Bunny.
That prospect made Fluttershy feel even guiltier for having said Twilight didn’t care about him. She turned the page and read a little more. “Chapter One: The Adventure. Angel Bunny had been having a good day as usual. His owner, Fluttershy, was making him his favorite meal. Even though it took a long time, she always made sure he got exactly what he wanted because she was a good pony.”
Fluttershy’s lip quivered. “All day, Angel played and played with his animal friends and with Fluttershy. They had fun all the way up ‘til it was time to go to bed. And even though their fun was over, Fluttershy let Angel Bunny sleep in her bed. He had a nightmare, though. He thought that he’d… he’d fallen asleep, and wouldn’t wake up.”
The words blurred, but Fluttershy pressed on. “Angel Bunny was really scared, so he woke Fluttershy up. The pegasus hugged him and stayed awake by his side, and they cuddled all night. She told him, ‘Don’t worry, Angel, I’ll always stand by you.’ ”
Tears finally dripped down her face and onto the ground below. This book was so cute and well-meaning that she couldn’t help herself. Twilight was the best marefriend anypony could ask for, and Angel was the best bunny.
As she skimmed through the rest of the book, it was filled with similar moments, all ending with a happy rabbit. It filled Fluttershy with a tender warmth that made her happier than she’d been in a long time. She was sure she’d never felt so strongly about that alicorn than in that moment. She held the book close to her chest, bittersweet tears trailing down her muzzle.
I love you, Twilight… And I’ll miss you, Angel Bunny. I’ll never forget either of you, for as long as I live. I promise.