> The One Where They All Turn Thirty
>  by Spike120812
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

> Not As Bad As You Think
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

	


Not As Bad As You Think 






“Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday dear, Sweetie Belle. Happy birthday to you! WHOO HOO!” 

Loud cries of joy and the clopping of hooves, and a set of clapping claws, echoed in Sugar Cube Corner as party canons set off all around the bakery. The place was decked from the floor to the ceiling with all things party. Streamers lined the walls, balloons hung everywhere, presents were stacked, and hard cider, punch, and various sweets and drinks lined the tables. Pinkie really outdid herself with this party. To top it all off, everypony showed up, from the birthday mare’s family, Princess Twilight Sparkle, her loyal grown dragon assistant, the other bearers of the Elements of Harmony, and her best friends, Apple Bloom, and Scootaloo. 

It was the perfect setup for the perfect party, except for the one thing that kept it from being the perfect party. That one imperfection took the form of the birthday mare looking like she was going to explode out of a mix of anger, sadness, and some other third emotion that brought out the worst in some ponies on this particular birthday.    

Sweetie Belle sat at the front of a long table with a large white and purple iced vanilla cake in front of her. On top of the cake stood thirty individual candles, each one mocking her with their light ember. Around her, many balloons read such things as ‘Happy 30’, ‘30 Years Old’, and other short thirty-related messages. 

A few more moments of silence passed, and Sweetie Belle still held her otherworldly gaze on the thirty-candled cake. 

Finally, the sister of the birthday mare, Rarity, stepped forward and broke the tension. “Sweetie Belle, darling,” she encouraged with her usual silky voice, “go on and blow out your candles. Make a wish. You are the birthday mare.”

“A wish, huh?” Sweetie snarked. “Okay.” She took another hard and menacing glance at the cake in front of her. As delicious as it seemed, it didn’t have a chance against the rage Sweetie Belle had at the moment. “I wish, I wasn’t going to die alone, in a light-up Hearth’s Warming sweater, talking to a menagerie of parrots!” The full-grown pale-white unicorn rose up on her hind legs, and brought her forelimbs down hard on the cake, smooshing the candles out and splatting frosting around the table, some even getting into her long pink and light-purple curly mane. 

The resulting sight was a very broken cake, and a crowd of silent ponies and a dragon. The tension felt in the air could’ve been cut with safety scissors. 

“Well, that’s one way to make a wish,” the one dragon in the room half-joked. 

“Spike, not now, please,” Rarity pleaded with the dragon before returning her attention to her sister. “Sweetie Belle, I know you’re a little upset about this particular birthday, other mares can get that way too, but was that really necessary?” 

“Yeah, Sweetie, what gives?” Apple Bloom voiced out.

“So, you’re the first out of the three of us to turn thirty, big whoop. We’ll be right there with you in a few months,” Scootaloo comforted as she wrapped an orange feathered wing around her unicorn friend. 

“Yeah, except that you’ll be turning thirty with your special someponies right by your side, and you won’t have the paparazzi hounding you for photos or tabloid magazines writing your fake retirement headline,” Sweetie remarked with a few twitches in her eyes, making everypony else in the room except Scootaloo and Apple Bloom take a step back.

“Awww, c’mon, Sweetie Bell. Ah’m sure it’s not as bad as you—” Apple Bloom’s efforts of comfort were cut off by the floating headline of a magazine held in Sweetie Belle’s magic glow. 

Written in bold and loud ink, the headline read, “Equestria’s Pony of Music, Sweetie Belle, Turns 30!”

“So the headline says ya turn thirty, big deal,” Apple Bloom commented after reading the headline. 

“Read the story,” Sweetie Belle droned back. 

Scootaloo and the other guests of the party inched closer to Apple Bloom to hear her as she read aloud. 

“Pop-Star, Sweetie Belle, has adorned us with her vocal abilities, catchy songs, beautiful ballads, concert extravaganzas, even a few feature films in her career that has spawned a jaw-dropping fourteen years, believe it or not. 

The young teen-pop star we saw fourteen years ago blew Equestria away, and has continued to do so for years, but this writer questions as to whether this now thirty year old mare can continue her musical domination. I don’t know, she looks like she’s getting tired, and this bad stallion can see. 

As the music scene continues to grow with fresh new faces, younger faces to be more specific, I honestly can’t see poor Sweetie Belle staying on top for very long. Oh well, fourteen years is still quite a run. But for now, let’s all help this mare celebrate her thirtieth. Happy Birthday, Sweetie Belle, from Pony Hilton.”

The room was dead silent again, save for the nervous coughs from a few of the guests in the room. 

“Big deal. That’s just one pony’s opinion. You shouldn’t let that—”

“Oh, there’s more,” Sweetie interrupted Scootaloo as she levitated a few more headlines to all of her friends’ faces. 

“Sweetie Belle, Thirty And Single”

“Pop Star, Sweetie Belle, Retirement At Thirty?”

“Another Year Single For Sweetie Belle” 

“Is She Done?” 

“She’s Outta The Game!”  

“Still No Ring For Thirty Year Old Pop Star” 

“Should She Quit?” 

“So Much For Being Young” 

“Sweetie Belle Spends Thirtieth Single” 

Each headline that the guests read took their toll on the mare that they were about. Sweetie Belle slumped onto the table head-first, wishing just one of those candles on her mashed up cake wasn’t there. She felt like curling up into a ball and just laying down on the floor for the next twenty years. 

It was a tender pink hoof on her shoulder that brought Sweetie Belle’s attention to the big-haired mare above her, her mother, Pearl. 

“Now, Sweetie Belle, honey, don’t go believing all these nasty things. You are a beautiful, strong,  independent mare who isn’t going to let some phony bologna headlines get you down on you birthday.” 

Sweetie Belle turned to her other side to her where her father, Magnum, swung a white forelimb about her side and messed with her mane with a brown hoof. “And no matter how old you get, you’ll still be daddy’s little cheesecake.” Speaking of cake, Magnum looked onto the table to the mashed dessert with one question in mind. “You gonna eat that?”

A small smack at his forelimb quickly made Magnum abandon any thoughts of dessert. 

“And you’ll still be my little sister, ooh-ooh,” Rarity squealed happily as she too joined in the family embrace.

“YAY! HUGS!” the hostess of the party cheered as she zipped to Sweetie Belle in a pink blur. “C’mon everypony, HUGS!” 

The remaining guests of the party took Pinkie’s invite and joined in the massive group hug, even Rainbow Dash joined in, but made sure to stay on the very outside of the group embrace.  

The embrace broke after a few moments and left a much happier looking Sweetie Belle. She could count on this group of friends and family to help her through this weird age gate.

“Thanks, guys. That means a lot.” Sweetie Belle then started to grab hold of all the abandoned magazine headlines in her magic and balled them into a large clump of paper. She hated those stupid headlines. Then again who wouldn’t hate the lie-infested print. She recalled one headline that nearly killed her father. 

“Sweetie Belle, Pregnant With Hunter Hay’s Lovechild!” 

Oh, the explanation it took to get Magnum to calm down that day. She wanted nothing more than to just get rid of those stupid magazines. Crumble them, set them aflame, anything. Suddenly, she jerked her head up, a light bulb going off in her head. A small devilish smile creeping up on her face as an idea planted itself in her head. 

She turned over to her group of friends and eyed the dragon in the group. “Hey, Spike! Up for a little target practice?” 

Spike stepped forward with his own devilish smile and took a stance. “Ready when you are, Sweetie Belle!” 

The ball of wadded-up magazines held in Sweetie Belle’s magic glowed a fierce light blue as the party guests counted down. 

“Three... Two... One... GO!”

Sweetie flung the paper ball into the air, and Spike sucked in a breath and, after a few seconds, let loose a ball of scorching green flames. The ball of fire met the wadded ball of magazines and set it aflame in a fiery display. Green embers fell from the air and gently faded out as the party guests cheered. 

Sweetie watched the cheering crowd and the falling ashes. It was like a load on her chest was lifted... well, at least one load was lifted. Something else, even after all the support she knew she’d have, still rested on her mind like a parasite. 

It wasn’t until an orange wing wrapped around her in a friendly hug. Scootaloo and Apple Bloom were standing beside her, both glad to see her smiling a bit. 

“Feeling better?” Scootaloo asked Sweetie Belle.

“Yeah, thanks guys.” 

Apple Bloom didn’t fully buy into Sweetie Belle’s answer. She could tell she felt a little better, but she knew there was more than meets the eye. “Somethin’ else’s botherin’ you, isn’t there?”

She was caught. Sweetie didn’t bother to deny it. After all, Apple Bloom was related to the Element of Honesty. As if she could get by her. “Well...” she paused as she looked at the ground, noticing the ashy remains of one of the headlines. It wasn’t fully burned and could still be read out through the singed edges. 

“Sweetie Belle, Thirty And Single” 

That one hurt a bit, not the fact that she was, but the fact that nearly everypony else in the room wasn’t. “I’m thirty, and I’m the only single pony here,” Sweetie confessed. “Scootaloo, you and Featherweight are already engaged, and Apple Bloom’s been married to Pip for two years now! I bet the others had somepony when they all turned thirty.”

“Not all of ‘em,” Apple Bloom responded. “Mah sister was single when she hit thirty. Right, Applejack!” she called to her sister and her friends. 

Applejack and the others came over to where the former Cutie Mark Crusaders were standing. “What, Apple Bloom?” 

“You were single when you hit thirty, right?” 

“Eeyup,” Applejack answered proudly, “and it didn’t bug me one bit.” 

“Ohhhhh, I know where this is going.”

Everypony turned their glance to the fashionista that approached her sister. “You’re a little worried about never finding that special somepony, aren’t you?” Rarity inquired. 

Sweetie replied with a small nervous rub of her neck. 

“Oh, Sweetie Belle,” Pearl started, “don’t let that get’cha down. So, you’ve hit a dry spell. You’ll find somepony soon enough.” 

“Easy for you to say, mom. You and dad were married before either of you hit thirty,” Sweetie Belle pointed out. “Not only that, but you don’t have ponies thinking you’re on the road to being a hasbeen just because you turned thirty.” 

“Hey!” 

This time it was Rainbow Dash that everypony had their eyes on. 

“Just because you’re thirty, doesn’t mean you’re finished. Just look at me. Everypony thought I’d quit or retire from the Wonderbolts when I hit thirty. They kept saying that it was a young pegasus's game... Well, guess what?” Rainbow jetted across the bakery, leaving her signature rainbow trail behind her in fantastic shapes. “I’m still flyin’!” Rainbow Dash beamed with visible pride. All those naysayers she dealt with didn’t have much left to say when Dash kept at it with the Wonderbolts, and still managed to outshine them all.  

“See, Sweetie Belle? So you’re single and have some doubters. Turning thirty still isn’t the end of the world. It’s just some silly little number.” Rarity waved a nonchalant hoof in the air dismissively to emphasize her point, only to be met with a few narrowed eyebrows and disbelieving faces. 

“Really?” Applejack asked flatly. “Is that how you felt when you turned thirty, Rarity?”

“Certainly. I handled my thirtieth with grace,” Rarity countered. 

“You handled it with crying, and a lot of tissues,” Rainbow Dash spoke up, trying to stifle a laugh at the memory. 

“Yeah, sis. I was there, remember?” 

“I don’t know what you girls are talking about,” Rarity said indignantly. 

“Rarity, you were a little overdramatic that day,” Twilight voiced. 

“I seriously don’t know what you all are talking about,” Rarity responded nervously. 

“I’ve never seen anypony cry that much.” Flutterhy’s voice barely came through as she recounted what she saw. 

“I’ve never seen that many tissues,” Magnum said through the crowd. 

“So, I cried a bit,” Rarity hesitantly admitted, “I was nervous and scared, but I wasn’t overdramatic.”  

“Rarity, honey, you kinda were,” Pearl argued lightly. 

“I was not!” Rarity argued back with a flip of her mane. 

“Rarity,” the fashionista turned around to see Spike, “you kinda were.” 

She stood for a few seconds in silence, trying to word her next sentence correctly. “Okay, so maybe I was I little... over the top with turning thirty,” Rarity finally admitted. 

Everypony in the room rolled their eyes at Rarity’s weak confession. 

“Oh sure, once Spike says it, you’ll admit it,” Rainbow Dash taunted. 

“Leave him alone, Rainbow Dash!” Rarity retorted as she ran up to the tall dragon’s muscular lime-green chest. “I just respect his opinion, is all.” 

“I bet you respect a lot more than his opinion, if ya know what I mean,” Rainbow tried to joke as she nudged Applejack, only to get a hard glare from her.

“Regardless,” Rarity continued, “I may have overdone the dramatics when I turned thirty, but I did get something very special out of the whole mess.” Her eyes met Spike’s emerald irises as she snuggled her dragon closely. 

Multiple small giggles and “Awwwww’s” sounded in the bakery. The story of Rarity’s thirtieth was one well known to most of the party guests, but two mares had absolutely no idea what everypony else was talking about. 

“What happened when Rarity turned thirty?” Scootaloo finally asked. All the ponies and the dragon in the room turned to Scootaloo and Apple Bloom with wide eyes. 

“What?” Apple Bloom asked the room of wide eyes. 

“Ohhhhhh, right! You two couldn’t come to Canterlot for Rarity’s birthday,” Pinkie remembered. Apple Bloom nodded her head in confirmation, making the party pony grin an anatomically impossible wide grin. “Then you two are in for one doozy of a story!”  
	
> Tears, Tissues... Some Other Third Thing
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

	




Tears, Tissues... Some Other Third Thing
 




Sunny weather, clear skies, pleasant temperature, all symbols of a perfect day in Canterlot. Ponies all around the posh city were trotting about, going among their own personal business with a skip in their step. But that was the thing, ponies were going around with ease. The same could not be said for the anxious looking purple-scaled dragon sitting on a bench in Canterlot Station. 

He stood up and paced around, even stretching out his wings to let some of the tension out as he awaited a train with the four ponies he hoped would help him with today. 

Just as he thought about it, a loud and unforgiving whistle blew through the train station, signaling the arrival of his friends. 

“410 from Ponyville to Canterlot, now in station!” bellowed the speakers all around the station. The dragon awaiting the train swooped over to its front car. One by one he watched ponies come and go, and finally, there they were. 

“SPIKE!” 

The dragon found himself toppled over by a pink blur and constrained in her death-grip hug. “Hey, Pinkie. How was the trip?”

“Great! And now we get to spend the whole day with you, Twilight, and the birthday mare herself!” Pinkie smiled as she continued her death-hold on Spike. 

“Woah there, Pink. Ah think you need to let the poor guy breathe.”

“But I haven’t seen him in a month, Applejack,” Pinkie moaned to her fellow earth pony as she tried to hang onto Spike while Applejack pulled her away. 

“We all missed him too, Pinkie,” Applejack replied with one final tug on the party mare’s tail, effectively separating her from the dragon, who started gasping. 

“Nice to see you too, AJ,” Spike said after pulling himself up and giving the farm pony a hug. 

“Don’t forget me, dragon boy.” 

Spike looked up to see Rainbow Dash, already flying around in the air to stretch her wings. 


“As if I could, Rainbow,” Spike responded with a fist bump to the rainbow-maned mare’s cyan hoof.  

“Spike!” 

Spike looked down to see his other pegasus friend, a timid cream-coated mare with a pink mane that hung down in the cutest way. “Fluttershy!” Spike took hold of the pegasus in his own embrace, which she happily returned.

“Wow, Spike. Sometimes I forget how big you are,” she whispered as she took in the sight of her dragon friend.

It was true. Spike was no longer the short baby dragon he used to be. Now he stood nearly two heads taller than all of his friends, grew a marvelous set of green-membranous wings, and gained a good set of muscles. While he may have changed physically, even going as far as to say more intimidating, he was still the loyal, kind, and sometimes smart-aleck dragon he always was.

“Thanks, Fluttershy.” 

With greetings out of the way, it didn’t take long for the girls to find that somepony was missing from their group. 

“Um, Spike, where’s Twilight?” Fluttershy asked. 

“She teleported to the boutique about an hour ago to finish setting up with Rarity’s family. Can’t really have a princess out and about without drawing a crowd.”

“Makes sense,” Applejack voiced before another, more nervous question surfaced in her mind. “Speaking of setting up... um, how is Rarity doin’ with the whole birthday thing?” she asked nervously. 

Spike shuddered a little bit as images of how Rarity might be feeling flashed through his mind. “I have no idea...Twilight sent me to make sure you guys got here, so I haven’t seen Rarity at all today.”

The other mares gave uneasy glances at each other. They all knew how dramatic Rarity could be, and how she reacted to certain things. Turning thirty wouldn’t elicit a very calm reaction out of the fashionista.

“You girls got my message on what not to bring, or put on the cake, or cards, or presents, right?!?” Spike asked like he was Twilight about to explode from anxiety. 

“Sure did, Spikey,” Pinkie smiled widely as she pulled out a letter. “No thirty-related messages on the cake, cards, or balloons, only one candle is being used, and we got some extra tissues juuuuuust in case.” 

Spike’s mental checklist marked off everything he remembered in the letter and let out a sigh when it was done. He only prayed Rarity wouldn’t be too down when they showed up. “Okay,” he announced with a clap of his claws, “let’s go see the birthday mare!”


***


The stroll from the train station to the boutique didn’t take too long, but it did bring back memories for the four mares behind Spike. They all remembered when Twilight ascended to royalty and had to move back to Canterlot with Spike. It was tough at first, but their friendship was too strong for some little move to break them apart. It was proven once again when Rarity made the move to Canterlot after her boutique business really took off. She set up shop, and was an instant success in the high-class city. 

For years, she stayed at the top of the fashion game. Designing, creating, and beautifying all of Canterlot, and of course, she had the help of her little assistant, Spike. Even if he wasn’t so little by the time she went to Canterlot. It was only a matter of time before the grown dragon’s undying feelings for the fashionista truly came out before they became a couple. It was the most magical time for both of them, an experience that had both its ups and downs, but never came short of treasured memories. Spike only hoped that today would be one of the more treasurable memories instead of one of the downs in their relationship. 

The group reached the boutique where whatever lay ahead still remained a mystery. It was time to see how Rarity was really handling turning thirty. With a hesitant claw, Spike reached out for the door. 

Without warning, the door flew open and slammed shut just as quickly with three ponies standing in front of it, looking like they just endured the apocalypse and were all on the brink of a mental breakdown. 

Spike and the others recognized the trio of ponies, Magnum, Pearl, and...

“Sweetie Belle?” Spike asked the disheveled pop-star. 

With a twitch of her eye and ear, the ivory mare breathed her words heavily. “If I stay in there any longer, I’m gonna kill her.” 

“I love my daughter. I love my daughter. I love my daughter. I love my daughter. I love my daughter,” Magnum and Pearl repeated as they rubbed their temples. 

Spike and the others stood there in a shocked silence. 

“What happened in there?” Spike asked the twitching family. 

Pearl was the first to speak. She gave Spike a pleading look with trembling eyes. “Spike, deary, I say this because I love you like a son... don’t go in there!” 

“It’s just a number,” Magnum said as he adjusted his straw hat, “and she’s treating it like it’s the end of the world.” 

“The WORST! POSSIBLE! THING! To be more specific, dad,” Sweetie mocked with her best Rarity impression.

“Where’s Twilight?” Rainbow Dash asked from behind.

“Still in there. Hopefully still sane,” Sweetie Belle deadpanned. “Listen guys, I’ve dealt with my sister for twenty-three years, and if I go back in there without taking a break, it’s gonna stay twenty-three years.” The last part came with a half-seriousness that may or may not have simply been sibling threats. “So, I’m gonna take my mom and dad somewhere to relax a bit, and we’ll be back in an hour. IIIIIIIIIIIn the meantime...” With a flash of light blue magic from the mares of the family, Sweetie and her parents were on the other side of the street in a dead-set sprint away from the boutique. “... Good luck, SUCKAS!!!” 

The group of five watched Rarity’s family sprint out of their sights. Nervously, they turned back to the closed door. 

“Now or never...” with a hesitant claw, Spike opened the door to his marefriend’s home, and before him was a sight one who knew Rarity as well as he did could expect.

Littering the over-decorated party scene were mountains of soaked tissues and numerous stained couch cushions. In one of the corners of the chaos stood Equestria’s fourth princess, looking like she was debating whether or not she should smack the wailing unicorn sprawled out across her ‘fainting couch.’ 

“WHY!? WHY!?” Rarity wailed on her couch as she blew into another tissue held in her light blue magic. 

Hoofsteps and footsteps brought Twilight’s attention to her approaching friends, each with their own nervous yet supportive smiles. 

“Heeeeeey, Twilight. Heeeeeey, Rarity. Happy birthday,” they congratulated the latter, only to be met with a pair of shocked and moist eyes.

“What’s so ‘happy,’ about knowing you’re just a mare waiting for her glory days to crash down in the worst possible way?!?” Rarity asked back incredulously. 

“You get cake?” Pinkie suggested honestly while she held out the white and purple frosted confection. 

“Oh, sure! Cake. Another way to make me fat! Can’t eat like you were twenty, or so all the magazines say! Just another way of reminding me that I’m... I’m... I’m...” she held for a pause while putting a forelimb to her head. “...OLD!” The mention of that awful word sent the birthday mare into loud fits of sobs and tears. 

“She’s been like this for hours,” Twilight whispered with repressed anger laced within. Fluttershy came to the alicorn’s side to calm her down while the others tried to get Rarity out of her bawling state. 

“C’mon, Rarity,” Pinkie said, “Twilight and your family decked out the boutique just for you.”

“And we came all the way from Ponyville just to see you, Rares,” Applejack pointed out.     

Rarity’s unfathomable waterfall of tears ceased after Applejack reminded her of the trouble her friends went for her. All she really wanted to do was crawl back into her plush pink bed and drown her sorrows while wearing a black cloak, but of course she had to have such good friends that wouldn’t let her sulk all day. 

A gentle claw on her shoulder drew her attention to the emerald green irises she had fallen in love with. “Rarity. I know you’re a little... ugh... not yourself right now, so how about we just try two hours for the party and if you’re still not feeling up for it, we’ll understand. Right girls?” 

Reluctantly, but understandably, the girls nodded their heads. Rarity acknowledged their nods with a small smile before looking back at Spike, then around the decked up boutique. Her family and Twilight really did a great job... her family! She already drove them away, and knowing she could drive five more ponies and a dragon away wasn’t something she wanted to say she did on her birthday, no matter how much she wished it wasn’t. 

Finally, she gave in with a loud sigh. “Okay, Spike.”

“YAY! PARTY BACK ON!!!!” Pinkie squealed in an explosion of confetti. For a mare relatively close to thirty as well, she never lost her energy for parties. “But do you wanna get changed out first, Rarity?” 

It was then that Rarity took a good look at herself in one of the many mirrors in the boutique, and regretted it instantly. Her pink robe and slippers were stained from her crying, her nose looked like it had been wiped clean of its white fur, and her usually regal, swirled, purple mane stuck out in all directions. 

“This is what thirty has done to me!” 


***


After another episode of streaming tears, explosive wails and sobs, and more words of comfort, Rarity was back to her usual pristine self, save for the whirlpool of heated emotions swirling around inside of her. The gang sat by a fully-decked table piled high with presents brought in earlier and the birthday cake. 

“Happy birthday to you!”

With the song done, an awkward silence lingered as Rarity looked on at the one burning candle on the cake, a blistering hate set on that one candle. 

“Uh, Rarity? Aren’t you gonna blow out your—” 

“I know that trick,” Rarity said venomously, cutting off Rainbow Dash’s question. “Use only one candle to try and cover up any trace of thirty on the cake. My mother used that trick on my aunt when I was five... It didn’t work.” 

Her gaze never left the single candle, and neither did her hate. A light-blue magic engulfed the candle, extinguishing the flickering flame. “I wish I had a bat,” she seethed, causing the other guests to back away. 

“Howwwww about you open gifts?” Pinkie suggested in an attempt to swerve the conversation. She brought out a bright pink box and hoofed it over to the birthday mare. “Betcha can’t guess who this is from,” Pinkie teased. 

Rarity just smiled a little and took the present. Out of it, popped confetti and streamers, a typical but enjoyable Pinkie present. After the party favor explosion, Rarity pulled out her gift, a newly released sewing machine, painted purple and customized with a small painting of diamonds. 

“Oh my goodness! Thank you, Pinkie,” Rarity breathed as she beamed at her gift. 

“Mine next!” Applejack offered with her own small box. Rarity took hold of it and from it, brought out a purple and white glass bottle. 

“Perfume!” Rarity beamed again as she took in the scent, apples and lavender. “It’s simply divine, Applejack. Thank you.” 

“There’s a card there too,” Applejack said with a hoof pointed at the open box. 

Rarity picked up the card with her magic and opened it. 

“For those nights when you just want to set the right mood. Happy Birthday, Rares! And Enjoy.

-Applejack


P.S. It works wonders! Try it out with Spike sometime.”

“Okay. Thanks, Applejack,” Rarity thanked while hiding the red that spread across her face, but then curiously spritzed herself with her gift. ‘Might as well.’ 

“No problem, Sugarcube,” Applejack replied with a wink. 

Rarity then locked her sights on a bright cyan present decked out in a few rainbow designs. “And I’m guessing this must be your’s, Rainbow Dash,” she cooed as she brought it in front of her. 

“You bet, Rarity,” the cyan mare affirmed before turning to her side and whispered into Spike’s ear fins, “Thanks again for helping me choose the gift, Spike.” 

“Kinda had to, Dash. You kinda suck at choosing gifts.”

“No I don’t!” Rainbow argued back with a huff.

“You gave me barbells for one of my birthdays, and you wanted to give Rarity hair dye,” Spike retorted flatly. “As if she’d want that! She already thinks she’s pushing it at thirty.” 

“...Okay, so, maybe I’m not the best gift giver,” Dash admitted lightly. 

Spike just rolled his eyes and looked back at his smiling marefriend. He loved seeing her smile, and he was over the moon that she was smiling for the first time that day. “She’s happy again,” Spike whispered back to Rainbow Dash. 

“Wait till she sees the gift you helped me with,” Rainbow replied. 

“You remembered the card, right?” 

“Yeah, it’s on top of the—” Rainbow Dash’s eyes shrunk to pinpoints in nanoseconds and her mane seemed to lose some color.

“Ooooh, there’s a card,” Rarity chimed as she began to take it out of its envelope.

“WAIT!” Rainbow practically yelled out as she attempted to snatch the card away from Rarity’s hooves. “Don’t read that!” 

“Whyever not, darling?” 

Rainbow shifted her eyes back and forth rapidly, trying to think of something. “Ugh... I was just... ugh... thinking you should open the gift first?” she answered with a weak smile. 

“Oh, nonsense. I’ll get to that shortly, but first, I want to read the card.” Tearing away the last of the envelope with her magic, Rarity brought the card to her muzzle and read aloud. 

“Happy Birthday, Grandma.” 

Rainbow cringed when she heard the hurt in Rarity’s voice at the word “Grandma”. 

“You know what they say... Better to be over the hill... than buried under it. Wishing you a Happy Birthday,

- Rainbow Dash” 

The room fell into a silence that could make Fluttershy sound like a drill sergeant. Rainbow cringed even harder once Rarity finished reading the card she thought would make a good joke at the time she bought it. The others looked at her like she was insane, Spike making a gesture with his arms that spoke, “What the hell, dude?”

“Rarity, I’m soooooo sorry. It was supposed to be a joke and I—”

“No. No, I get it. Just a simple... heartbreaking joke,” Rarity choked while repressing a sob. 

“No no no no no, see. You’re only thirty, and far away from being a grandma,” Rainbow tried to reason. 

“No, I know. To be a grandma, I’d have to be married and have kids first, but I don’t, but some ponies still think that I could be a grandma, and that’s why it’s so funny,” she said through quivering breaths. “I’m just gonna go and... wallow again.” With another sniff, Rarity broke away and ran off upstairs to her room, slamming the door behind her and falling onto her bed, leaving her guests in a stunned silence. 

Nervous shifting echoed around the room for a few seconds, and Rainbow Dash sunk down in her seat. “I’m so sorry, guys. I thought it would make a good joke at the time...” 

“WHY CELESTIA?!? WHY LUNA?!? WHY!?!?!?” came the wails of the distressed unicorn in the upstairs room. 

All eyes fell on Dash as she sunk further into her seat. Spike was seated next to her with half-lidded eyes and crossed arms. 

“All you had to do was buy the card.” 


***


A ring of the bell on the door of Carousel Boutique sounded off as three more relaxed-looking ponies enter the room, bringing a light breeze into the store with the smell of Spring. Sweetie Belle and her parents breezed on into the boutique with smiles and fresh faces, hoping to see signs of a successful party, but upon entering the living area, abandoned all their hopes. 

Sitting on the couch, Rainbow Dash, Applejack, Fluttershy, and Twilight looked on at the pink mare trying her best to keep the party alive with what could only be described as the most ridiculous game of charades ever. 

“C’mon, girls. You really can’t guess what I am?” Pinkie inquired the sitting group. 

Applejack sighed out and lazily answered. “No, Pink. None of us can guess. What are you?”

“I’m a donkey in Prance eating a cronut on the Hayfiel Tower, duh!”

Collective annoyed sighs came from the mares on the couch as they sunk deeper into the plush cushions. The party had taken a turn for the worst after Rarity bolted to her room, and unless Spike could somehow work his magic on her, the rest of the day was gonna go by real slow. 

“So, I’m guessing you’re still on square one?” 

Eyes turned to Sweetie Belle and her parents before Twilight answered. “More like back at square one,” she said flatly. 

“It was supposed to be a joke. I thought it would be funny at the time,” Dash moaned as she buried her face in the arm of the couch. 

Creaking steps sounded as Spike made his way downstairs while massaging the sides of his head with his claws. “She’s not coming down. One second I’m telling her she isn’t old, she has nothing to worry about, next thing I know, she’s talking about having to find a retirement home and if she’s going to have to take a liking to Bingo.” 

“WHY CELESTIA!? WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS TO ME!?!?” Rarity wailed out from her room, unknowingly earning the groans of all her guests downstairs. 

“C’mon, guys. We can’t leave Rarity like this. It’s her birthday!” Pinkie spoke.

“That’s the problem, Pink,” Applejack retorted. “But Ah don’t see the big deal. It’s just a number, half of us are gonna turn thirty later on this year.” 

“Well, you know, Rarity,” Twilight reminded.

“Well, I don’t care,” Pearl announced with a stomp of her hoof, “I’m not letting my daughter spend what is supposed to be a milestone in her life upstairs crying. Sweetie Belle.” Sweetie looked to her mother who had a gaze of slight maliciousness. “Let’s make some toast.” 


***


“Hmmm. Maybe I could just exile myself inside the boutique... or would that just be considered being a shut in? I could try and start a new life and say I’m twenty-six... no that’s preposterous... twenty-four.” 

Rarity stood by a mirror in her room, pondering her possible plans of exile that time after time never took off. “If I did, where would I go? Prance? Would I have to pack warm? Oh, the packing would be a monster.” She sighed at her barrage of questions that would go unanswered. She trotted to her bed and plopped down, making sure to avoid the mountains of tissues that littered her bed from earlier in the morning. In retrospect, maybe she had overreacted, but at the time, she just felt like utter crap, and she still did. 

Thirty. It was an age that some mares treat as just another number and another year, but for some, it brought out their worst. Rarity took in her room, her eyes landing on the many pictures that hung or were framed around her wall. 

“So young. So beautiful.” Her eyes darted to one photo in particular that stood by her bedside. One of her and her dragon. They were snuggled together on a hill with the widest smiles that made Pinkie’s usual grin look like a frown. She remembered the day that picture was taken, that beautiful day. It was the day Spike told her he loved her, and it was the day she told him the same.

In her magic, she took hold of the photo and smiled at it dreamily for a few seconds before her smile faded and tears built behind her eyes. “Why would he still want me?” 

Painfully, she sat the photo aside to help prevent her tears from breaking loose. All she wanted to do was flop back on her bed and wallow in whatever it was ponies are supposed to wallow in. She dove into her pillow muzzle-first and took a few sniffs to hold back her tears. As she inhaled she took in a weird scent... something hot... something similar to food... something... burning.

Rarity jolted out of her bed and bolted towards the door, flinging it open with her magic and made her way down the stairs to see a small trail of smoke that triggered her fire alarm. “What happened? Why is there smoke? What’s burning?”

At the last step, she was met in the living area with concerned eyes from her friends and smug looks from her mother and sister, both of whom had smoking bowls of grey goop. Rarity’s eyes narrowed in an unamused stare. “Let me guess, toast?” 

“Uh-Huh,” Sweetie Belle chirped, “it was the only way to get you down here that wasn’t by force.” 

“Yes, well I’m down, now I’m going back up,” Rarity snarked back as she turned off the fire alarm with her magic. 

“Rarity wait!” came Fluttershy’s call. “We know you’re a little sad about your birthday, but—” 

“But you really need to get a hold of yourself, dear,” Pearl interrupted with a mother’s hidden annoyance. “I get that turning thirty is scary. I went through it too, but this is too much.” 

“Rarity, we just want to give you a nice party,” Magnum spoke. 

“Half of us are gonna turn thirty later on this year. You’re not gonna be alone in this, you know,” Rainbow Dash brought up. 

“Why are you so upset about turning thirty anyway?” Twilight asked. 

“Why am I upset?!?” Rarity asked back like she already expected everypony to know. “Because this is just the beginning!” 

The cocked heads and raised eyebrows in the room signaled for Rarity to continue. 

“I thought I’d never turn thirty, but here I am today! And it’s just the beginning. Now it’s thirty, next it’ll be forty! Then fifty! Next thing I know, I’m sporting ‘I don’t care’ hair, forgetting everything, ponies on the street will be calling me ‘lady’ or ‘ma’am!’ I’m not ready for that! And my mane! Not too long ahead, I’ll be dyeing it to try and hide the horrible patch of grey creeping it’s way down my scalp while at the same time trying to hide the wrinkles that keep popping up no matter how much concealer you put on.” 

The ponies in the room listened to Rarity’s rant, afraid to speak up at the scene unfolding. 

“And that’s not all! Oh, no. Then comes the tiredness, the wanting to stay in more, the groaning to get up or sit down, the three-day hangovers, then, finally, I’m showing up at Spike’s wedding, shoving the bridesmaids out of the way to catch the bouquet, hoping that I can snatch somepony half as good as Spike before I kick the bucket or risk becoming a crazy seamstress for the rest of my life!” 

“Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait... my wedding?” Spike asked after Rarity’s borderline meltdown. 

“Oh come on, Spike,” Rarity said with a slump and moist eyes, “I’m already thirty and you’re still young. Look at you. Someone like you can have any mare or dragoness he wants. Why would you want to be with somepony like me when you can trade up for someone younger?”

Before Spike had a chance to speak out, Rarity turned tail and sprinted up to her room and slammed the door, leaving the ponies and dragon in another awkward silence. 

After a few moments, Spike slumped back down into his seat with wide eyes. “I can’t believe she thinks that.” 

“I knew she was scared about turning thirty, but I didn’t know she was that scared,” Sweetie Belle breathed. 

“We’re only four years apart! And I’d never ‘Trade up,’” Spike said with air quotes. 

“Spike.” The dragon in question turned his head to his adoptive sister. “You do love her, right?” 

“Of course, Twi! I’ve loved her ever since we came to Ponyville!” 

“Then... maybe you should go tell her that. She’s really scared right now. Maybe all she needs is for her to know that you love her,” Twilight suggested. 

Spike gave a glance upstairs and heard the sobs from his distressed love. “I think she’s gonna need a little more than that... and I think I know the trick.” Spike reached over his back and dug out for something between his scales. “I was gonna save this for our anniversary, but I think now’s a good time.” From his back, he pulled out a little black box... the box. His friends all gasped at the sight of the box, each of them knowing exactly what it was. 

“Spike! You’re actually gonna do it?!?” Applejack gasped. 

“Uh-Huh.”

“Aren’t you nervous?” Fluttershy quietly asked.

“Yeah, but I was gonna be nervous anyway if I waited.” Something flickered in Spike’s mind that reminded him of something important. Quickly he turned to Magnum and cleared his throat. “Ugh, Mr. Magnum. I’ve dated your daughter for a few years now. I love her deeply, and I want to ask for your bless—”

“YES! Do it! I’ve been waiting months for this!” Magnum beamed as he gave Spike a death squeeze between his forelimbs. “Pearl! Sweetie! Help him out here,” Magnum instructed to the two mares behind him. 

Without hesitance, Pearl and Sweetie Belle’s horns alighted their light-blue hues and encased Spike. Sweetie Belle shot him a wide grin and glimmering eyes before he disappeared in a flash of light. “See you in a few, bro.” 


***


Rarity sat on her bed, a tissue held in her magic to her eyes as she sobbed again. Her little meltdown a few moments ago not only made her reveal her true fears about today, but just made one of them in particular grow when she saw the look on the dragon they were about. 

Like the universe didn’t want her to have just a second of not thinking about the issue, a flash of bright light flooded her room before dropping a purple mass onto her floor. 

Rarity blinked a few times to see Spike trying to regain his balance as he stood up. “Spike?” 

“Hey, honey,” Spike responded as his bearings returned. 

“Spike, what are you doing in here?” 

“Telling you that I could never trade up.” Spike sat next to Rarity. He took her hoof and stared directly into her azure eyes as she looked on into his emerald irises and warm, inviting smile. “Rarity, I have loved you since the day I first saw you. I have loved you at your best. I have loved you at your worst. I loved you then. And I love you now. You are the only mare that I have ever liked, and I could never ever, imagine being with somepony else.” 

“But you’re so much youn—”

“It’s only four years, Rarity.” 

“But I’m thirty now! How could you not even think of running off with some other mare or dragoness?” 

Spike took hold of her other hoof, urging her to stay focused on him. “Rarity, look at me.” 

Her gaze transfixed on her dragon, his smile still there. “You are the only mare I have ever wanted to be with. You’re scared of me running off? I keep thinking to myself that I must be the luckiest dragon in the world to have somepony like you in my life.” 

Rarity’s heart fluttered at Spike’s words. All the doubts she had melted with each syllable he spoke. “You mean it?” 

“You tell me,” Spike answered with half-lidded eyes. He quickly closed the space between them in a passion-filled kiss. Rarity let her eyes roll back as she took him in, savoring the taste she couldn’t get enough of. After a few moments, they parted with dreamy looks on each other’s faces. 

“Amazing,” was Rarity’s only word. 

Spike chuckled back as his face started to heat up and his heart quicken at what he was about to do next. “You know another reason why I’d never leave?”

“Why?” 

“Because I’m about to do this.” 

Rarity watched with wide eyes as Spike got off the bed and down on one knee. ‘Oh my gosh! Is he?’ From some loose scales, he produced the little black box and opened it to reveal a finely cut diamond ring. ‘He is!’  

“Rarity, you have made me so happy by just being my marefriend, and I want to do nothing but make you happy for the rest of my life...” Spike’s heart pounded against his chest, nerves going crazy, but locked on Rarity’s growing smile and glittering eyes. “...Will you marry me?” 

“YES! YES! YES! Oh, Spike, YES!” Rarity shouted with glee as Spike slipped the ring onto his fiance’s horn. Rarity lept into her dragon’s arms once he got up and the two embraced in their first kiss as an engaged couple. The sparks that flew and the passion between the two could never hoped to be matched.

“We have a son!”

“I have a brother!” 

“I have a sister!” 

“Way to go, Spike.”

“Congratulations you two.”

“About freakin’ dang time!” 

Spike and Rarity broke their kiss and looked to the door to see it wide open with their friends and Rarity’s family standing in the frame. All of the beaming at the newly engaged couple. 

“Thanks, guys,” Spike spoke while still keeping his and Rarity’s embrace. 

“You know what this means?!?” Pinkie asked as she reached for something behind her back. Pulling it out, she sent explosions of confetti and streamers from her party canon. “Happy Engagement/Birthday Rarity and Spike!” 

“That’s very nice, darling, but I was hoping to get a little more time alone with Spike,” Rarity replied, the later part coming out in a sultry tone heard only by Spike. 

“I got’cha, sis,” Sweetie Belle chirped with a giggle before closing the door and locking it with her magic, leaving the two lovebirds alone. 

“Why do they want to be alone?” Pinkie asked. The others answered with laughs at the pink mare’s obliviousness the the whole thing as they all headed down the stairs. 

“Hey! That’s still my daughter in there,” Magnum pointed out worriedly.

“Oh, don’t be like that, honey. Remember when we first got engaged?” Pearl reminded with a devilish grin. 

“Oh, yeah,” Magnum answered with a laugh and his own smug expression, “ended up banned from riding that train ever again.” 

“Gross!” came Sweetie’s disgusted squeal that only elicited laughter from her parents. 

Back in Rarity’s room, the happy couple were busy in another passion-filled kiss that began to turn into something a little more. Rarity’s hooves moved all over Spike’s muscular back as Spike’s claws wrapped and felt through Rarity’s beautiful purple mane. He caught a scent coming from her, something wonderful that drove him crazy as he inhaled. 

“Best birthday ever,” Rarity breathed after they parted. 

“Best fiance ever,” he returned with a sniff. “Wow, you smell good.” 

“Oh? So you noticed,” Rarity playfully teased with a bat of her eyelashes. “Well... what shall we do about it,” came her sultry voice. 

Spike looked down at Rarity with half-lidded eyes and a wide smile. “I’ve got an idea in mind.” Rarity smiled seductively at this and even more when Spike swept her off her hooves and onto the bed, both of them knowing exactly where this was going. 

“Make me sore, dragon boy.” 


***



Present Day
 


***


Rarity snuggled up to her husband as a round of “Awwww’s” and “Dawwwww’s” echoed in the bakery. 

“And that’s how Equestria was made,” Pinkie concluded with a smile, earning the confused glances of the ponies and dragon in the room. They all just shrugged it off as Pinkie being Pinkie. 

“I love that story guys,” Sweetie Belle chimed as she recounted the day she practically gained a brother.  

“Ah can’t believe Ah missed that,” Apple Bloom pouted. 

“That was so cheesy I could actually smell it... but it was cute,” Scootaloo admitted. 

“Isn’t it?” Rarity teased before giving Spike a peck on his cheek. “And like I said before, Sweetie Belle, turning thirty wasn’t the end of the world for me. More like a great beginning.” 

“Yes, well, I don’t exactly have a drakefriend to get engaged to. I’m still single and have a mountain of ponies thinking I’m gonna retire.”

Rarity stood there, dumbfounded, her sister’s issues on turning thirty completely gone from her mind until now “...Okay maybe that wasn’t the best story to help,” Rarity agreed sheepishly.

“Mine can help,” Rainbow Dash said proudly as she pounded her chest and flew over to Sweetie Belle. “So, you’ve got some doubters, big whoop, so did I. Ponies thought a Wonderbolt at thirty was only good for office work and introductory training... well I showed them.”

“Oh! I remember that!” Scootaloo admired at her foal-hood hero. 

“I bet you do, Scoots. Why don’t you tell them?” Rainbow suggested. 

“Alrighty then.” Scootaloo cleared her throat and began. “It was a few years back in Cloudsdale...”
> P.S. Look Under Your Pillow
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

	




P.S. Look Under Your Pillow


The clouds were fluffy and firm, Celestia showcased her sun’s undying rays, and the wind was at a minimum. A perfect day for flying, and a perfect day to watch the best fliers fly. High in the clouds stood the prized jewel of Cloudsdale, the Cloud Coliseum. Pegasi crowded the stands and cheered aloud in anticipation for the spectacle to happen. It was a mosh pit of joy, screams, and hyperactive ponies dying to see them.

“Fillies, and gentlecolts!” blared the speakers from all over the cloud stadium. “Welcome to the Cloud Coliseum! We hope you’re just as excited as I am for what will be a spectacular day for flying.” Cheers and hollers echoed throughout the stadium, begging for more. “Now, presenting the pegasi you’ve been waiting for, the rookie team of the fastest fliers in Equestria, the stars in the sky, the phenomenons themselves... THE WONDERBOLTS!” 

The crowd boomed into roars and stomps of applause that could shatter anypony’s eardrums into pieces. Pegasi in their signature blue and yellow flight suits and goggles erupted from the locker rooms of the coliseum in trails of lightning clouds, shooting sparks as they zipped through the endless sea of blue sky, crashing through clouds like they were made of paper. 

From what could count as the floor of the floorless coliseum, the rookies of the Wonderbolts soared upwards, showing off their speed in a magnificent display of twirls, spins, and sky acrobatics. 

There were solo tricks and group tricks, all executed in a perfect fashion that sent the crowd into wild, fanatic screams. The tricks kept going for minutes on end until the finale of fireworks. The rookie Wonderbolts soared to higher skies, looking like heroes on a history book page with the fireworks exploding behind them. 

From the ground, one could mistake it as the biggest party in Cloudsdale. While it may not have been, a party was taking place at the same site of the Wonderbolts show. 

Away from the stands and the crazy screams from adoring fans, and inside the one of the locker rooms of the Coliseum, a small gathering was taking place, all in celebration of a certain cyan mare. 

“Happy Birthday, Rainbow Dash!” 

Mini party canons, designed by the party mare herself, set off with a light thunderous sound and covered the nearby lockers and benches in a layer of confetti and streamers. Cheers from Rainbow’s six best friends, most of the former Cutie Mark Crusaders, and her special somepony sounded in the locker room. 

Rarity threw her forelimbs around the birthday mare in a tight hug. “Welcome to the thirty club, Rainbow Dash.”

“Glad that you’re not the only one anymore?” Rainbow asked back all-to-knowingly. 

“Yes,” Rarity simply answered. 

Rainbow just rolled her eyes at her friend’s blunt answer, but smiled nonetheless. 

“But I am happy for you. The first Wonderbolt in history to stay on the flying team at thirty years old.”

“What can I say? I’m awesome,” Rainbow responded with a pound on her chest. “And thanks everypony for coming. Means a lot.”

“Thank Twilight and her cloud walking spell. Otherwise there’d be four pony pancakes on the ground,” Spike spoke, making the three earth ponies and one unicorn in the room shudder a bit. 

“Well, thanks again guys. Bummer Sweetie Belle had to miss out though.” Rainbow Dash turned her head to face Rarity. “Why couldn’t she come again?”

“Oh, tonight’s the opening night of her co-tour with Neighanna up in Manehatten, darling.”

“Ooooh, I love Neighanna!” Pinkie chirped with a bounce as she prepared her voice. “Yellow diamonds in the light. And we’re standing side by si—MMPGH!” 

An orange hoof stopped the pink mare’s song short. “No. Just... no,” Applejack said dryly before taking her hoof off her fellow earth pony’s mouth.

“Aw, I like that song,” Rarity whined at Applejack's interruption. “Back at the boutique, Spike would sometimes turn that song into a piano ballad, and we’d sing along, just the two of us.” Her eyes twinkled as Spike drew her in for a little nuzzle. 

Unmoved by the sweetness of it all, Rainbow Dash pointed a hoof at her open mouth, faking a gagging sound. “Bleh! You guys have gotten sappier and sappier since you got engaged.”

“Oh, like you haven't since Soarin popped you the question?” Applejack said with a sly grin. 

Rainbow Dash, the mare known for not giving into the sappiness of nearly anything, nearly lost her reputation right then and there as the faintest of reds inched across her face. 

Seeing this little blush, the pale-blue pegasus stallion standing next to her nudged her playfully. “Yeah, Dash. Haven’t you?” he asked playfully with a smirk.

“Shut up, Soarin,” Rainbow said with a gentle shove and a laugh. She loved when he played around with her, just as he loved it when she showed her soft side, limited as it was in that hard shell that was Rainbow Dash.

She could still remember the first day Soarin asked her out. The early stages of their relationship rushed by quick. Both treated it as something so casual and tried not to get too attached to one another, or as Rainbow would say, get too sappy about it. Love, however, had other plans. It wasn’t long before the two grew closer and deeper feelings came to light. The two became as inseparable as Spike and Rarity, as well as the other couples in her group of friends at the time. 

For three years, their relationship progressed, having its ups and downs like a normal couple would, but it was two weeks ago that Soarin finally asked Rainbow to marry him, and she said yes in the most uncharacteristically way possible. She thanked Celestia and Luna that nopony saw how she reacted, but also thanked them for giving her the best stallion she could hope for. 

Metallic screeching of the speakers coming alive pulled everyone’s attention to one of them as they listened to the announcement. 

“Wow! That was intense. I can’t wait to see what the rest of the team will look like, and I bet neither can you! So, without further ado, I give you... THE WONDERBOLTS!!!

The screams of the crowd outside nearly deafened the nine ponies and one dragon in the locker room. More so when cracks of lightning blared as pegasi jetted out of the locker room. 

“Kinda sucks that you gotta work on your birthday,”Apple Bloom spoke up after the last screech silenced from the speakers. 

“Especially since Spitfire gave your finale spot to Rumble,” Soarin added. 

“She did... but I got it back,” Rainbow replied smugly. 

Confused looks exchanged among the ponies and dragon in the locker room before Pinkie spoke up. “What finale? And what’s this about Rumble?”

Soarin turned to Rainbow Dash with a slightly shocked expression. “You didn’t tell them?” 

“Thought I’d make it a surprise.”

“What surprise?” Twilight, the not knowingness killing her slowly. 

Rainbow Dash turned to the orange pegasus by one of the benches. “Hey, Scoots. Ever heard of something called the FS Mark M?” 

Scootaloo’s purple eyes lighted up with a burning excitement. “Only that it’s the latest flight suit out, has unicorn magic coursing through the suit that can do special effects while a pony flies, said to increase speed, aaaand that it’s rumored to make its debut in a future Wonderbolts show!” 

“Well, everything except the future show part,” Rainbow corrected. 

“Awww, the Wonderbolts aren’t gonna use it?” Scootaloo asked, concerned.

“We are, but not a future show,” Rainbow answered in a teasing tone. 

It took a few seconds, but the gears finally clicked, and Scootaloo’s eyes widened and glimmered like a foal in a toy store. “OH! MY! GOSH! You’re gonna fly in the FS Mark M?!?”

“You know it.” 

If she were ten years old again and heard this news, Scootaloo would’ve fainted after foaming at the mouth in excitement. Now, for a few seconds, she was ten years old again. 

“When did Spitfire give you that job again?” Soarin asked Dash. 

“You’ve really been out of the loop since you became a recruiter,” she joked back. Soarin just rolled his eyes. 

“Wait, how does Rumble fit into all this?” Twilight couldn’t help but ask. 

“Okay, well first off, remember my crash about a month ago?” 

Her friends all cringed at the memory of Rainbow’s accident in one of her shows. It was another day, another show, and another dream-felt day. Everything ran so smoothly at the beginning of the show. That is until Rainbow Dash decided to get creative with the grand finale. 

“How can we forget? You had to stay in the hospital for days. Doc said you were lucky it was just a dislocated shoulder and broken wings,” Pinkie reminded. 

“Yeah, well, what I didn’t tell you guys is that while I was in the hospital, I overheard Spitfire and Rumble in the next room over. See, Spitfire already planned out who’d wear the suit, and which show it’d be debuted. It was set for today’s show, and I’d be the one to show it off, but while I was in bed, I heard Rumble say how it might not be a good idea letting someone as unpredictable as me try it out.” 

“Well, you did kinda go against the flight plans,” Soarin brought up.

“Are you with me or against me?” Rainbow snarked back. 

Soarin clammed up instantly and let Rainbow continue on. 

“So, not only does he say that, but also mentions my age, how I’m was very close to turning thirty, and that I might not be able to take a crash like that if it happened again. Just like how Spitfire couldn’t take another one.” 

Simultaneous hums of understanding signaled the memory of Spitfire’s near career ending crash. 

The Wonderbolts flight team had one thing similar with other physically demanding activities like Hoofball and Peach Basketball; once a team member hit thirty, ponies started counting the days till their retirement. Once Spitfire was nearing that milestone, she tried to show everypony that she still had more to show. What ended up happening was a massive injury that kept her from flying like she did ever again. With still much to offer the actual flight team, she landed a job as choreographer for the shows. A pony like her in charge of something like that, mistakes were hardly an occurrence, and the resulting shows were mesmerizing and executed to the dot... then came Rainbow Dash.

Not one for following plans exactly, or fly without a trick up her sleeve, Rainbow Dash constantly surprised her teammates and the crowds with spontaneous tricks and maneuvers. Since nopony got hurt, and the crowd seemed to love it, Spitfire just went along with Rainbow’s antics. Then came her crash. Spitfire knew how much Rainbow loved flying, and how devastated she’d be if something like what she went through happened to her. Spitfire also knew that Rainbow would want to improvise again, so with Rumble’s argument thrown out there, she gave the finale spotlight to him instead. 

“Then, how did you get your finale spot back?” Fluttershy whispered. 

Slowly, a malicious smile inched up Rainbow’s muzzle as her eyes lidded close halfway. “Simple. I just gave him and his marefriend a place to love each other.” 


***



A Week Ago
 


***


Rainbow walked down the Wonderbolts training grounds again after another aggressive practice flight for the next show. She went at it alone, giving her the freedom to scream and shout at the skies all she wanted. The thought of not testing out the new flight suit was killing her, and her rage towards the weasle that caused the whole mess was on the verge of bursting like an H-Bomb. 

Normally, she would follow a rage filled practice with a visit with Soarin in his recruiting office to calm herself down, but with her stallion off in Vanhoover on a scouting trip, fury still resided in the rainbow mare, fueling her like a dangerous fire. 

To add to the fuel, a blur of light grey whizzed past her, carrying with it another blur of pale-purple and moisture from the nearby clouds, splashing Rainbow Dash all over.

“Rumble,” she seethed under her breath as the two blurs entered the Wonderbolts building. The water still trickled down her face, fueling her rage even further. “Don’t kill him. Don’t kill him. Don’t kill him. Don’t kill him,” she muttered to herself as she flew into the building. “Get dried off and don’t kill him.”

Rainbow trotted into the nearest mare’s room in the cloud building, focused on just getting herself dry again. She grabbed a few paper towel and patted her head and face until a faint noise and staggered breathing was heard from one of the stalls. 

Curiously, Rainbow looked around to see she was alone, save for the growing noise in the stalls. At first it was just a few gasps, then came the slight grunts, and moans.

“You okay in there?” Rainbow Dash asked the door of the stall. 

Frantic shuffling was heard through the door followed by a mare-like voice. “I thought you said we were alone!” 

“I thought we were!” 

Rainbow Dash recognized the second voice. That stupid, puny to her, scumbag voice. “Rumble?” she asked, hiding the venom in her voice. 

The door to the stall creaked open, revealing the embarrassed pegasus stallion and an annoyed unicorn mare standing close to him. 

“How? Why a bathroom?” Rainbow asked in a dry tone. 

“Cloud walking spell I learned,” the mare answered the first question. 

“And me and Dinky were a little eager,” Rumble finished off.

Many thoughts ran through Rainbow Dash’s mind at that moment. Admittingly, the scene before her was a little familiar with her own experiences, but that was a different story. Right now, it was all judgement, blank stares... and an idea. 

Rainbow let a small smile creep it’s way on her muzzle, faking sincerity in her words. “Nah, nah, I get it. I’ve had a few rides just a few stalls over. But, ugh, you know, with lunch about to start, ponies are gonna be in and out of here like crazy.”

Like she timed it, the three ponies overheard the stomping of hooves and flapping of wings sound out through the bathroom door. 

“Craaaaap,” Rumble moaned 

“But,” Rainbow continued with a pause, “I think I can let you guys use a room that’s perfect.”

Dinky and Rumble looked at each other for a moment with suspicious eyes. “What’s the catch?” Rumble inquired. 

“Nothing at all,” Rainbow answered nonchalantly. “Just wait here for a minute.” Before the couple could ask anything else, Dash flew out of the bathroom in a rainbow trail. True to her word, she returned a minute later with a playful look. “Just follow me.” 

Dinky followed the cyan pegasus without question while her stallionfriend was a little more cautious, but trailed behind nonetheless. The trio passed up other pegasi with each step down the halls of the Wonderbolts building. When the swarm died down, Rainbow Dash led the other two ponies down another hall to a gold-plaque door. 

“Recruiter: Soarin” 

“Soarin’s office?” Rumble asked. 

“It’s clean, it’s quiet, he’s got a phonograph with some very sexy records, if I do say so myself,” Rainbow said with a remembering smile. “And best of all, nopony would bother you.” 

Dinky nudge closer to Rumble with a sultry smile. “You know, I’ve always wanted to do it in an office.” 

“It is pretty hot,” Rainbow added. 

By now, Dinky was practically jumping in place right by Rumble’s side, silently urging him to go along with it. 

“Aaaand, you’re doing this why?” Rumble asked the cyan mare. 

“C’mon. You think me and Soarin haven’t had a some problems with being alone? I know what it’s like.”

“C’mon, Rumble. She’s offering,” Dinky begged with pleading eyes. It was working, and Rumble’s guard started to drop when Dinky nudged into him a bit more.

“Alright, alright,” Rumble caved. “but are you sure nopony will come in?” he asked Rainbow again. 

“Soarin’s off on a recruitment thing, so yeah.” 

Rumble’s eyes softened noticeably as he smiled. “You’re alright, Dash.”

“Anything for a teammate,” she said with a shrug before opening Soarin’s door to let the lovebirds in. “Have fun, you two.” 

A quick close of the door and it wasn’t long before Rainbow Dash heard giggles and horrible pet names get tossed around between the two. With a more malicious turn to her smile, she looked up at the nameplate on the door. After a few glances to her sides, she confirmed nopony was around. Cautiously, she slipped the nameplate out of its holder before trotting a few steps to the side to the next door to see the nameplate hung on that one.

“Show Captain: Spitfire” 

She removed the nameplate with her free hoof and slipped in the other nameplate she was holding before replacing the plate in what Rumble and Dinky believed to be Soarin’s door. 

“Back in place,” she smiled to herself. One turn away, and she was trotting down the hallway like she was on top of the world. Hoofsteps that weren't her own echoed through the now empty hallway, and a blazing orange and yellow mane only brightened Rainbow’s mood even further. “Afternoon, ma’am!” Rainbow saluted. 

“Afternoon, Dash,” Spitfire answered before passing her up. “Love to chat, but I got some show plans to finalize. See you out there.” 

“Aye aye, Captain!” The two mares took their different paths down the hall, Rainbow slowing her trot significantly, not wanting to miss what she knew would come. 

Spitfire’s hoofsteps slowly faded away, followed by the clicking of a doorknob. Rainbow waited, grinning the whole time. 

The door opened. 

“WHAT THE HELL!!!”


***



Back In The Locker Room
 


***


Everypony in the room stood with wide eyes and hanging jaws at Rainbow Dash’s story. The disbelief in the air hung around like morning breath in a humid room. 

“You. Are. Insane,” Applejack breathed. 

“Am I?” Rainbow joked back with a devil’s grin. 

“You let ponies do it in my office?!?” Soarin hollered. 

“Oh, don’t act like it’s never been done in there.” 

Soarin shut up instantly. The others however were all babbling in their own incoherent sentences. 

“Anyway,” Rainbow continued, “Spitfire got pissed and took him off the finale spot. I jumped in and told her I’d be willing to do it. Then she told me all about the risks, the safety measures, why she didn’t want me to do it in the first place, blah, blah, blah, and I got my position again!” 

The screeching of the speakers in the locker room rang once again before the announcer came on, grabbing the group’s attention. “WOW! What a fantastic show! But it’s not over yet folks. And this is gonna be quite the treat. A flier of legends and speed, a Wonderbolt for over ten years, and today is her birthday!”

“Rainbow Dash, you’re about to go—” Twilight stopped when she turned her head away from the speakers to see what her friend was wearing. 

Standing in a red and yellow flight suit with a similar design to the standard Wonderbolts suit, Rainbow Dash was slapping on her flight goggles. A strange orange glow flowed through the yellow of the suit, humming with magic. “How do I look?” 

Almost all her friends and fiance all looked her over, admiring the new suit in awe. 

“I would’ve used more red,” Rarity commented, earning an eye roll from the mare in the suit. 

“Whatever, Rarity. Anyway, I’m gonna go on, so you guys should probably get to the seats I saved for you guys.” 

“Okay, Rainbow Dash. Good luck out there,” Twilight encouraged as her horn flared up. 

“Won’t need it,” Dash responded. 

“Knock ‘em dead, honey,” Soarin said before giving Dash a quick peck on the cheek. 

“Will do. Oh, and make sure somepony wakes up Scoots. Hate for her to miss the finale,” Rainbow asked with a hoof pointed at the shock-faced pegasus who still bore the smile she fainted with. 

“Will do,” Apple Bloom confirmed before her and the others disappeared in a flash of lavender, leaving Rainbow Dash alone in the locker room. 

Metal screeching sounded again as the announcer came on. “Aaaaand now… presenting your finale to this great show… iiiiiiiiiiiiiit’s RAINBOW DASH!!!” 

Hollers of loyal fans and showgoers rumbled throughout the colosseum as they awaited the legend herself. 

Rainbow took a breath, and smiled. 

“Show time.”


***


Twilight and the others all dropped into their seats in a flash of lavender disoriented and woozy, but all together. Scootaloo’s impact on the chair brought her back to consciousness as well as confusion when she frantically checked her surroundings. 

“What whatta howda how did whatta howda what?” 

“Scoots, it’s alright. You just passed out after Rainbow Dash said she was flyin’ that new fangled flight suit,” Apple Bloom tired to explain, only to have Scootaloo hyperventilate like a fangirl again. Her breathing patterns returned to normal once Apple Bloom got a good grip on her shoulders and sat her down. 

Spike, Rarity, and Soarin were by the railings of their box on the lookout for their favorite Wonderbolt. 

“Hey, Soarin?” 

“Yeah, Spike?”

“Is that FS, whatever it is, dangerous?” 

“Potentially, yes, but since Spitfire organized how the finale’s supposed to go, it shouldn’t be.”

“So, Rainbow just needs to follow Spitfire’s plan?” Rarity asked the pegasus.

“Yep. Nothing bad should happen just as long as Rainbow Dash follows Spitfire’s plan exactly.” 

Simultaneously, the two ponies’ and dragon’s heads jerked up as their eyes shrunk to pinpricks. Rainbow Dash… following a plan, free of improvisation, free of surprises, and being told how to fly.

One of Spike’s eyes began to twitch when these impossible thoughts replayed in his mind. “Welp, she’s boned.” 

“Aaaaand now,” the announcer's voice bellowed through the colosseum, “presenting your finale to this great show… iiiiiiiiiiiiiit’s RAINBOW DASH!!!”

The group of nine were all at the rails of their box, and there she came. Emerging from the locker room entrance, Rainbow Dash bolted outside with her signature rainbow trail, but two things stood out. One, she flew way faster than most were used to seeing her, and two, her rainbow trail sparked in the air, bringing out the colors like Rainbow Dash was creating a multi-colored fire. 

She flew through the air like comet, bordering the sound barrier in just a matter of seconds as a cloud of energy surged around her. The yellow of her suit glowed orange with magic, delivering sparks and other fun effects to Rainbow’s trail. 

“THIS IS AWESOME!!!” Scootaloo screamed as she took in the colorful display before her. “I’M SO HAPPY!!!” 

Her foal-hood idol ricocheted through the air, spinning, flipping, and shooting off rainbow sparks like fireworks. Behind her goggles, Rainbow Dash saw blurs of blue sky and the tiny dots of ponies brush past her in a matter of milliseconds. How fast she was going, she didn’t know, but it was faster than she was normally used to, and she was loving every second of it.   

The wind through her mane, the rush in her ears, the adrenaline through her veins, it was every sensation she loved as she flew. Cheers and hollers the fans in the colosseum bellowed in her ears. The applause, the admiration, and the borderline stalker-like messages on posters ponies held up kept Rainbow Dash smiling throughout her routine. 

“Time to kick it up a notch.” 

She put on more speed, appearing as something less than a blur. To most ponies in the stands, all they saw was the rainbow trail, and not its creator. Rainbow Dash twirled in the air, turned at seemingly random places, her trail following and sparking with more ferocity. This random feats of flying began to show purpose when the rainbow trail finished off in an instant high in the sky. 

In the sky, painted in a spark-throwing rainbow of color, floated three simplistic images of pegasi, but Rainbow Dash wasn’t done. She flew in the middle of her three sky works of art. The yellow of her suit glowed an intense orange before she flared her wings out. As she did, the rainbow art pegasi flared their wings out as well. The crowd gasped collectively at the magical display, giving Rainbow a sense of control. She gave a quick glance over the crowd before clapping her wings together, hard. 

The resulting site was beyond comparison. All three of Dash’s sky drawings brought their massive wings together, exploding into a massive blast of sparks and fireworks of all sorts of colors. Reds, yellows, blues, greens, everything color shot out in a fiery display. It was New Year’s in daylight, and it was beautiful. The crowds cheered at a deafening volume, some even trying to reach out to the remnants of the colored sparks.

The firework display went on for about a minute, dissipating to a slow drop of sparks and embers. Rainbow Dash’s friends stood by the rails of their box looking up at the fading finale. No words could describe the awe that hung in the air. 

“She actually followed the routine,” Soarin gasped in disbelief. “She actually followed the routine.” 

“And that fillies and gentlecolts is what I call a show-stopper. I think I speak for everypony when I saw that was one heck of a… wait a minute ponies, I don’t think it’s over folks!”

Soarin’s eyes once again went wide and blank save for the dots that were his pupils. “That’s not in the plan.” He turned his gaze back to the sky to see Rainbow Dash flying straight up. “That’s not in the plan!”

Rainbow Dash rocketed upwards in the sky, a focus in her goggled eyes that could pierce platinum. She made a turn and started circling the sky, drawing in the nearby clouds like a she was a living cyclone. The audience from below watched in a confused awe at what the cyan Wonderbolt was doing. Not only were the clouds being drawn into her living tornado, but were also changing color like an insane chameleon as they tailed behind Dash and her trail. 

Dash kept her cyclone going for a few more seconds before deciding she had enough. Cutting into the center of her circle, she kept her focus where she was headed, downward. In a sporadic move, Rainbow Dash drove herself, and the clouds she gathered, downwards to what could be considered the center of the colosseum. 

A familiar buildup surrounded her in just a matter of seconds, the suit helping her accelerate rapidly for her signature move. The rainbow-dyed clouds followed Dash on her descent. Dash held back just a little, waiting for the right moment.

“Little more,” she muttered to herself.  

She let herself pick up the slightest of speed. Her ears splayed down her head, and her mane ran wild in the wind. Right as she was above the center of the coliseum, she let loose. 

Sound was broken, ponies might have been deafened, and Dash raced her way down to the ground, but what she left behind in the coliseum was something unreal. 

The clouds she brought along with her splatted like paint in a ring of rainbow that spread through the coliseum. It was like another firework display, but instead of fiery sparks, the clouds exploded in a beautiful cool mist of all sorts of colors that radiated in the sun’s glow, sparkling like glitter. Ponies in the stands freaked at the extravagant display. Some in the front rows were wet and colorful, but they didn’t care. 

“Oooooh, glittery,” Pinkie awed as she took in the sight. 

Scootaloo reached her hoof out , trying to catch some of the remnants of the best Wonderbolts show yet. 

The rest of the group also took in the spectacle before them. It was beautiful. Plain and simple. Unpredictable, but beautiful. 

Everything seemed to be at total peace until Soarin brought something up that shook the others out of their trance. “Ugh, guys. Where’s Rainbow Dash?” 

“Ugh, guys?”

Everyone turned their head to see a pink flank in the air with a twitching tail, and a head poked through the massive cloud they were standing on. 

Pinkie popped right back up with a worried look on her face while her tail still twitched away. The tail alone was enough for everyone who knew of its omen to start worrying. 

“Okay, Spike and ponies that can fly, grab somepony and fly down,” Twilight instructed before scooping up Pinkie Pie in her forelimbs. 

The others followed suit, Fluttershy taking Applejack, Scootaloo with Apple Bloom, and Spike with Rarity. Soarin was the first one to pierce the cloud floor and make a dive towards the ground below. 

Soarin quickly covered the distance between the Cloud Coliseum and the spot where he saw several broken branches and a trail of uplifted grass. At the end up the trail, he saw her. 

With an increased determination, Soarin rocketed down toward Rainbow Dash, landing just centimeters away from his fiance. He kneeled down with his mind screaming out his worst fears as he took in the unconscious mare before him. 

Before Soarin’s mind could assault him any longer, he heard a few groggy moans and groans. Rainbow Dash slowly came to, gaining more as each movement she made was strained. 

The others all landed nearby a few seconds later and circled around their fallen friend. 

“Yo, Rainbow Dash… you alright?” 


***


“Okay,” Twilight began to the ponies and dragon around her, “that was a massive fall, and quite a crash, and we should all thank our lucky stars that Rainbow Dash made it out of there unscathed.” 

Her friends all nodded their heads and thanked their stars, but one pegasus lying down on a bed was not. 

“Uh, friendos? I did not make it out unscathed.” Everyone in the room turned their heads to see a very bandaged up Rainbow Dash lying in a hospital bed. “I’m extremely scathed.”

“At least you can still move your back legs,” Pinkie brought up, doing her best to look on the bright side. 

Rainbow Dash just sighed out and tried to lean back down to bed before remembering the upper body cast she was in limited her movements. 

Right after Rainbow Dash came to when she was on the ground, Soarin and the others wasted no time in flying her to the nearest hospital. With Cloudsdale floating over Ponyville, they all quickly made it to Nurse Redheart and the doctor who patched Rainbow Dash up. “I hate this. I hate this so much. How long am I gonna have to be in this stupid cast?”

“Doc said about two weeks, and that’s with unicorn magic helping out,” Soarin answered. 

“UGH!” If Rainbow could move her forelimbs, they’d be flailing around in a tantrum. 

“Look on the bright side, Dashie, you made the sparkliest, most awesomest, most rainbowest thing ever!” Pinkie exclaimed, bouncing around the hospital room. 

“You should’ve seen the crowd!” Spike chimed in.

“You were simply stunning out there, Rainbow Dash,” Rarity added. 

“IT. WAS. AWESOME!!!” Scootaloo screamed out. 

“Yeah, but what will ponies think once they find out about my little crash? They’re already saying I’m just another Spitfire waiting to happen,” Rainbow argued. 

Soarin came to the rescue by rushing to a counter on the side of Rainbow’s bed where a radio sat. He turned a few knobs, and after a few fuzzy sounds, came on the clear and deep sounding voice. 

“With your six o’clock radio news, good evening, Ponyville, I’m Light Burgundy. Our final story today, sparks, living art, and a wonderful mist show. I’m talking about today’s unbelievable Wonderbolts show up in Cloudsdale. Not only was the rookie team at the top of their game, but once the whole team came together, I could barely keep my eyes on everything that went around. There was flying, there was lightning, there was speed, there were tricks, there was everything that made me fall in love with this team in the first place. It was a coliseum of swirling excitement and emotion, but what had to be the highlight of the entire show was the grand finale performed none other than the longest running member of the team, Rainbow Dash!” 

Rainbow perked up slightly as Light’s commentary continued on. 

“Her flying was Rainbow at her best, and the tricks she did… I don’t even know how, but there were living sky drawings, fireworks, all ending in a flurry of rainbow colored mist that sprinkled over the first few rows of the crowd. I don’t know what new suit she was wearing or how she managed to do what she did, but it was amazing. I feel bad for anypony who couldn’t make it to see this spectacle.”

“And what a way to celebrate a birthday. That’s right folks, today Rainbow Dash turns thirty. Can you believe it? Seems like just yesterday she was the hot-headed rookie wanting to be the best. Well, she’s still hot-headed, but she is the best, and I can tell she will still be the best. All those ponies that have bet on her retirement better get a second job because they just lost that bet.”

“Take it from me folks, I’ve seen many Wonderbolts come and go, but this one seems as hard to get rid of as the mole on my uncle’s rump. I doubt that crash she suffered right after the show will keep her down for long. Any pegasus that had moves like her is definitely not one to take lightly, so Rainbow Dash, we hope you get better soon, and hope to see you flying again soon, if not for years to come. Well that’s all for today, once again with your six o’clock news, I’m Light Burgundy, and you stay classy, Ponyville.” 

Soarin turned a knob again, silencing the radio. Rainbow Dash was in a still silence, wearing the widest smile that only Pinkie could match. 

“When I get out of this thing, I’m gonna fly like nopony’s ever flown before!” Rainbow declared with fiery eyes. 

“That’s the Rainbow Dash we know and love,” Spike beamed with a light punch to Rainbow’s shoulder, only to immediately regret his action after seeing her wince. 

“Pain! Everywhere!” Dash said between gritted teeth. 

“Dash, I’m sorry. I—”

“Ugh, Ms. Dash?” 

Everypony’s head turned to see Nurse Redheart with a letter in her mouth. 

“Somepony came in here and asked me to give this to you.” 

“Can’t exactly get up and get it… or hold it,” Rainbow responded with a slight shuffle in her cast. 

“I’ll take care of that, Nurse Redheart,” Rarity offered, taking the letter in her magic. Red Heart took her leave and left Rainbow and her friends to themselves. 

“Who’s it from,” Dash asked her unicorn friend. 

“Getting to that, darling.” Rarity ripped open the envelope and took a glance at the letter. “It’s from Rumble!” Clearing her throat, she started to read. 

“Dash. As much as I hate to admit it, but you were pretty cool out there. I’ve never seen somepony fly the way you did. It was pretty awesome. But I still know how you got your finale spot back from me, so watch out, ‘cuz I’m gonna get’cha back. You won’t know when, but I’ll get’cha. It may be today, it may be tomorrow, it may be weeks from now, but I’ll get’cha.”

An awkward silence fell over everyone in the room after Rarity finished reading. All eyes were on Rainbow Dash, waiting for her reaction. 

Instead of worry, she blew a quick razzberry. “Whatever. I’ve been in prank wars with Pinkie. He’s not gonna get me back.” 

“Oh, wait, there’s more,” Rarity added.

“P.S. Look under your pillow.”

Rainbow gave Rarity a look that said, “Really?”. 

Rarity gave a weak smile before turning to Soarin. “Ugh, Soarin? Do you think you could—”

“Yeah,” Soarin dragged, unsure of what to expect. He steadied Rainbow Dash on the bed with one of his forelimbs. Hesitantly, he used his other forelimb to lift the pillow from Rainbow’s head. 

Under it lied a scrunched up latex object that seemed to be covered with something sticky and opaque. Everypony’s eyes widened and their jaws dropped as they concluded what it was, Rarity nearly gagging when she hit her revelation. 

“P.S.S. Dinky says hi. Also, Happy Birthday, Rainbow Dash.

-Rumble”	


***



Present Day



***


Just like it was about seven years ago, the ponies and dragon were all in a dead silence. This time, three out of surprise, and the others with an unwanted remembrance. 

Rainbow Dash clenched her eyes and shuddered at the memory of last part of the story. “They don’t make water hot enough or brushes hard enough.” 

Sweetie Belle tried to find some words of comfort, but fell short to only a simple sorry. “Oh my gosh! Rainbow Dash, I’m so sorry for you.” 

“Eh, don’t be. Traumatizing as it was, and as scalding as the showers were, I got him back. Oh yes, I got him back.” There was an evil look to Rainbow Dash’s eyes that struck fear into the others. Those that knew didn’t want to mention what she did. Those that didn’t know didn’t want to know. 

“Good to know?” Sweetie squeaked. 

“Ah, don’t worry about Rumble. He got better. And besides, that wasn’t my point. I showed everypony that day that I still had energy to spare, and a desire to fly. Sure, some ponies still doubted me, but I kept at it, one upping them with each show.” 

Sweetie Belle took in the Wonderbolt’s advice. She had a point. 

“Just don’t quit, and don’t pay attention to those that doubt you. I didn’t quit, and I’m still a Wonderbolt. Hay, Sapphire Shores didn’t quit, and she’s up there with the legends. That could be you one day!” 

Sweetie Belle’s eyes now glimmered at the idea of her being a legend. Young singers that would look up to her, the hope in their eyes, to say she inspired ponies. It was a dream that she had, and only hoped to make a reality.

“Just keep singing away, Sweetie Belle. You’re gonna go even farther than you already have,” Rainbow added, a sense of certainty in her voice that nearly obliterated all of Sweetie Belle’s doubts.

“Thanks, Dash.” 

“And as for the whole single at thirty thing,” Applejack brought up drawing attention to her, “Ah can tell ya that it’s not that bad. Ah was perfectly fine just being single.”

“Then you got yourself a husband.” 

Applejack snapped her head to the cyan pegasus smirking at her from the air. “You and Ah both know that wasn’t till later.” 

“Whatever,” Rainbow shrugged. 

After sighing out, Applejack regained returned her attention the birthday mare. “Anyway, it’s perfectly fine that you’re not with your special somepony yet. Half of us weren’t when we were thirty.”

“And it didn’t bother you?” Sweetie couldn’t help but wonder. 

Applejack just nodded.

“At all?!?”

“Eenope. You know, thinkin’ about it, I was more concerned with just doin’ what Granny Smith told me. 

Sweetie’s cocked head and raised eyebrows signaled for Applejack to dig deeper. 

“Okay, it was back on the farm on mah birthday…” 
	
> Have Fun Before Ah'm Dead
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


Have Fun Before Ah’m Dead 





Apples. It was the only thing on the farm mare’s mind for the past few days, if not weeks. All around the proud farm of Sweet Apple Acres, apple trees glimmered with their red, yellow, and green beauties, right and ready for bucking. 

Applejack stood by her latest bucked tree with baskets of apples at its trunk. Applebuck season was in full swing, and the late afternoon fall sun was still shining through the reddening leaves of the endless sea of trees. Her siblings left a few minutes ago to take a little break, but she was determined to keep going. Nothing was going to get in her way of finishing off this rest of the orchard. Nothing, nothing except an old, yet energized voice calling out to her. 

“Applejack! Can you come in here and help your Granny with somethin’?” 

How Granny Smith managed to holler out as loud as she did at her very elderly age was a  mystery to the rest of the Apple family. Then again, so was how she’s still among the living remained a mystery. Applejack wasted no time in dropping what she was doing and hightailing it back to the farmhouse to see what her Granny needed. 

She reached the farmhouse rather quickly, but upon entering, she was met with an empty living room. 

“Ah’m in here, AJ!” Granny Smith’s voice called out from the kitchen. 

Applejack stepped through the living room and into the kitchen where she welcomed the sweet and warm scent that drew her to the table. Sitting in an old chair by her walker, Granny Smith was beaming a denture-aided smile with several fresh apple pies that just begged to be eaten. Sticking out of each pie were 3 and 0 number candles, already threatening to drop their wax onto the pies.

"Happy birthday, Sugarcube!"

Applejack walked towards her granny and gave her a careful hug, as not to break the old mare. "Thanks, Granny”

"Awww, wasn't nothin'. Besides, it ain't everyday one of my granddaughters turn thirty!" A little flint of light seemed to reflect off Granny Smith’s eyes as she lost herself in memories. “You’ve grown up so much, AJ. Seems like just yesterday you were askin’ for more fritters.” 

Applejack went in for another light hug with a wide smile on her face. “Granny, no matter how old Ah get, Ah’ll always be your sugarcube.” 

“I know, AJ. I know.” After a few more seconds, Granny Smith broke the embrace and  shakingly got up to grab her walker. “Now c’mon, AJ. There’s a nice little surprise for you in the livin’ room.” 

“Aw shucks, you know you didn’t have to,” Applejack said before she tried to lead Granny Smith out of the kitchen, only to be swatted away. 

“Ah may be old, but Ah can still use this thing without somepony leadin’ me,” the old mare ranted as she took painstakingly slow steps. Applejack followed right behind her granny, matching the snail-like pace she was setting. After what seemed like forever, the two made it to the living room. Nothing seemed to change. Same brown wooden walls and floors, same rug on the floor, and the same assortment of pictures around the house. 

“What exactly am Ah supposed to be lookin’—”

“SURPRISE!!!” 

Confetti and streamers flew all over the farmhouse as multiple forms popped up from behind various furnitures. Big Mac and Apple Bloom stood in front of the couch that Applejack’s six best friends hid behind. The smile after the initial shock on Applejack's face could almost be matched by her pink friend behind the couch. 

“Aw shucks, you guys,” Applejack giggled. Before she knew it, she found herself encompasses stretched out pink forelimbs that brought her into a huge group hug orchestrated by Pinkie. 

“Third one in the thirty club, Applejack!” Pinkie cheered through the seven other ponies and one dragon in her grasp. 

“Ah know, Pink, but can you let us down now? Gettin’ kinda hard to breathe!” Applejack asked between forced breaths. 

Pinkie’s grasp only tightened at Applejack plea, but only for a few seconds before she released her friends and made a bounce directed at the kitchen. “Okay I’m done.” 

“Ah guess Ah shoulda seen that one comin’” Applejack breathed heavily. 

“Yeah, well, she is Pinkie Pie,” Apple Bloom reminded everyone. “But hey! Happy birthday, sis!” 

“Thanks, Apple Bloom,” Applejack said with a little nudge.

Before she knew it, Applejack was wrapped in a headlock by a strong red forelimb and cringed a bit as she felt her scalp get assaulted by a rough hoof. 

“Happy birthday, lil sis!” Big Mac’s deep voice piped as he continued the noogie that his sister felt even through her Stetson. 

“Mac! C’mon now! I ain’t a filly anymore!” Applejack protested as she struggled against his grasp. 

“You’re still mah lil sis,” Mac countered as he kept up his assault. Thankfully, he knew when to stop. With his grip on the orange mare gone, Mac quickly back away from his irritated sister. She was about to say something, but was stopped by a pink blur popping out of the kitchen frame. 

“Whooooooo wants birthday pie!!!” Pinkie called out at the top of her lungs. 

The living room emptied out in seconds and piled into the kitchen, leaving Applejack in a dead silent living room. With a roll of her eyes, she trotted towards the kitchen where she met a festive sight. 

The simple farmhouse kitchen was transformed into a full on party room decked out with streamers, balloons, and other various party decorations and favors that could only have been put up so quickly by one certain pony. All her friends and family crowded the table and pushed all the candled pies to Applejack’s end of the table. 

“One! Two! Three!” Pinkie counted before taking a deep breath and the others joining in. 

“Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday dear, Applejack. Happy birthday to you!” 

Applejack stood at one end of the table with a wide smile, happy to see all her friends and family together just for her. She looked down at all the pies with candles and closed her eyes. A few seconds later, she inhaled and blew all the flames out as the others clapped hooves and claws. 

“Thanks, guys.” 

“It’s your birthday, AJ! What did you expect we’d do?” Dash counted with a smirk. 

“Whatever. C’mon, let’s get these pies served.” 

“I got it, Applejack,” Twilight offered. Her horn glowed it’s lavender aura and the candles on the pies vanished in a flash and the pies were split into equal pieces, enough for everyone in the kitchen. With the pie slices now on plates, it was only seconds before everyone dug in. 

With a ravenous appetite and a set of killer jaws like his, Spike finished his slice easily with a dreamy look on his face. “Mmm. Another thing I’ve missed about Ponyville, Apple family pies.”

Twilight and Rarity had a similar blissful expression that agreed with the dragon’s words. 

“We do make the best,” Apple Bloom added before taking another bite of her slice. “So, what do you guys got planned for AJ’s birthday?” 

Rainbow Dash was the first to speak up. “Thought we’d take the newest member of the thirty club for some dancing and drinks at her favorite bar.” 

Applejack beamed with delight at the thought of drinks with her friends. “Sounds like a plan, but first, Ah gotta finish off part of the orchard Ah was workin’ on.” 

The kitchen filled with loud moans and groans of immense irritation. 

“Really, AJ?” Dash whined. “You’ve had to ‘Finish off part of the orchard’ for your past five birthdays!” 

“The farm grew,” Applejack defended. “Applebuck season doesn’t stop for somepony’s birthday.” 

“Still, darling, it’s your birthday. Surely you can take just a few hours off to have some fun. Twilight, Spike, and I came from Canterlot just to celebrate with you,” Rarity tried to argue.

“Ah know, and I’m over the moon that you three did that for me, but Ah still got a responsibility to the farm.” 

“Oh, to hay with that!” 

Applejack’s eyes grew wide when she heard her Granny shout out those words. “Granny?!?” 

“AJ, Ah love that you’re a hard worker, and Ah love that you’d do anything for the farm, but you really need to learn when to just take a day. Not everything’s about apples you know.” 

“But—”

“No buts.”

“Besides,” Apple Bloom joined in, “Big Mac and Ah are here. Ah may not have a cutie mark with apple farming, but Ah still remember everything Ah learned,” she said with a hoof pointed to the toolbox image adorning her flank. “We can get it done, right Mac?”

“Eeyup.”

Applejack had a hesitant look on her face that the her friends and family easily noticed as they awaited her next argument. 

“But there’s a lot of trees left to buck. It’ll take more than just two ponies.” 

“We already thought of that,” Apple Bloom answered smugly. Before Applejack could even question her younger sister, a few knocks sounded off from the front door. “Mac asked Lucky Clover and Caramel to help out.” 

“See, AJ? Everything’s all taken care of. So go on a get outta here. Go crazy,” Granny practically begged. Mac, Spike and the girls all turned their heads to see Applejack thinking it over, debating whether or not the stallions outside had the Apple work ethic. 

“C’mon, AJ. For once, can’t you just not think about work and go out and have some fun,” Granny Smith continued on, preparing for her sinker, “before Ah’m dead.”

If Applejack’s pupils shrunk any more than they already had at that moment, they’d be invisible. Apple Bloom and Big Mac had the closest look of surprise that could match their sister’s. Their surprise quickly changed to smugness. They knew Granny got her. 

Applejack remained in a dead silence. Granny Smith was pleading with her through her old orange eyes. She cringed at her words and was ready to break. “Okay! Okay,” she exclaimed, throwing a forelimb in the air. “Ah won’t worry about applebuckin’. Just, please don’t use that one me again.” 

Granny’s pleading expression faded away in an instant to be replaced by a simple smile. “Deal. Now go wash up. You’re still all sweaty.” 


***


Applejack stood in front of the bathroom mirror, adjusting her  dried off straw-blond mane. She still couldn’t get over the dirty trick her Granny used, but she figured there was no point in arguing. After all, maybe a little time off was something she needed, and a few hours at her favorite bar with her best friends sounded really nice. With her mane now in place, she slapped on her signature stetson hat and made a break towards the stairs. As she headed down, she could hear Big Mac explaining what needed to be done in the orchard to Lucky Clover and Caramel. 

She reached the bottom step and exchanged a few quick hellos to the two new stallions in the house before turning her attention to her friends. Five of them were present, but she couldn’t spot Twilight. 

“Ugh, guys? Where’s Twi?” 

“She’s over here, sis!” Apple Bloom called from another room. She stepped out, followed by a red-coated unicorn mare wearing a simple light purple jacket. Her mane resembled the front of Twilight’s mane, but the back was put up in a ponytail, and instead of dark purple with a streak of pink, solid blue colored the red mare’s mane and tail. 

Applejack took in the unicorn before her and stared at her familiar looking violet eyes. “Twi?” 

The red mare nodded her head with a smile. “Yeah, can’t really show up to bar and expect everypony to act like a princess didn’t just walk through the doors.” 

Applejack just nodded at her friend’s explanation as her eyes darted to the jacket Twilight was wearing. “Apple Bloom lent you a jacket to cover them wings Ah see.” 

“Sure did, sis. A unicorn with wings would kinda blow her cover,” Apple Bloom replied. “Now remember, AJ, we got everything under control here. You just go out and have some fun for once in your life.” 

Applejack’s eyes narrowed slightly as she let out a small snort. She was about to say something back, but a few sets of hooves began to push the farm mare out the now open door as her friends followed out. 

“Stay out late,” Granny Smith called from the house before Mac quickly shut the door. 

Applejack stood outside the farmhouse with a confused look aimed at her friends. “Ah thought it was ‘Don’t stay out too late’.” 

“That’s how much you need this,” Dash deadpanned with a smirk, earning a small death glare from her orange friend. “Now c’mon, this rainbow head needs her dancing juice.” With that, Rainbow Dash flew off in a rainbow trail towards the group’s destination. 

Pinkie broke away as well to chase after the rainbow pegasus. “Wait up, Dashie!” Seconds later, the others ran off in Pinkie and Rainbow Dash’s direction. 

Applejack gave one more look at the farmhouse and rolled her eyes when she recalled her family’s antics, her Granny’s specifically. “Dirty trick,” she muttered under her breath before taking off as well. Had she stayed just a few seconds more, she would’ve seen the door open and the tan stallion with a combed back brown mane stand in the doorway try to call out to her. 

“Happy birthday, Applejack!” Caramel’s words didn’t reach the farm mare. She was already well on her way out of the farm and into town. “Aaaaand she didn’t hear me.” 


***


“Oh, get down, turn around, go to town, boot scootin’ boogie.” 

All around the country bar, ponies were dancing to the music in a trying sync. Even Twilight was starting to get the rhythm and seem less like a spasmodic rag doll that suddenly began to move. Those that didn’t know the dance managed to catch on quickly to the movements everypony motioned. Applejack on the other hoof didn’t need catching on. She controlled the floor like the song and its moves were embedded in her DNA. 

“Go, Applejack!” Spike cheered. Even on two legs he couldn’t match Applejack’s skill. How the hay a pony could even dance on four legs was something of a mystery to him. 

The song continued and the seven of them kept dancing, Applejack serving as their lead through the rest of the song. When it ended, they all walked off the dance floor when a slow song started. 

“What? You two aren’t gonna stay and dance?” Rainbow couldn’t help but ask Spike and Rarity in a teasing manner. 

Rarity waved a dismissive hoof at her pegasus friend. “Next one. I need a drink right now,” she said through a few pants. 

“Ah didn’t think you’d like this kind of thing, Rares,” Applejack commented. The others all turned an inquisitive look to their fashionista friend. 

“I’ll admit, it isn’t my ‘go-to’ dance preference, but somewhere inside, we all have a country bone I guess. And I must say, Applejack, you were quite the expert out there with that last song.” 

“Hey, if you don’t know how to dance to that song, you ain’t a real Apple.” There was a sense of seriousness in Applejack’s voice that made the others question whether or not she was exaggerating or not. “Now c’mon, you guys took me out here for some dancin’ and drinks. So far we’ve only done one of those things.” 

No arguments presented in the group to that suggestion. The gang crowded the bar and placed their drinks. Behind the bartender sat multiple pictures of valued customers, ones including Applejack, Big Mac, Apple Bloom, even Granny Smith, both current and older pictures. A simple smile graced the farm mare’s lips as she took in the familiarity of the bar; the pictures, the neon signs of various alcohol brands, the wooden floors, the happy groups of ponies, the random Hearth’s Warming lights strung up, even the one drunk that seemed to liven things up all brought happy memories flashing before her eyes. Now, sitting here with her six best friends for her birthday, she could honestly say she was glad her family forced her to take the night off.  

The loud clang of mugs on the bar brought Applejack out of her trance and her attention on the seven large megs of hard apple cider. “Seven ciders, on the house for the birthday mare and her friends.” 

Applejack gave a shocked smile at the bartender who smiled back at her. “Thanks, Tap. How’d you know it was mah birthday?” 

“AJ, you’ve been comin’ here since you were 21. I know my loyal customer’s birthdays.” A grateful look shined through the middle-aged stallion’s eyes. “Can I count on you to stay a loyal customer?” he asked, already knowing the answer. 

“Count on it.” 

Tap smiled back and broke away from the group to tend to a few other thirsty ponies as Applejack and the others all took hold of their mugs. Before any of them could take a drink, they heard Spike clear his voice and hold his mug in the air. 

“Applejack,” he addressed, “you are one of the toughest, strongest, and most trusting ponies I’ve ever been glad to call my friend, and I think I speak for all of us when I say that.” The rest of the girls all lifted their drinks up in agreement. “You’re a hard worker, an honest mare, and even though you can be the most stubborn pony in all of existence, it’s something I’d never want to change about you. You’re a true friend, and happy birthday.” 

“Happy birthday, Applejack!” Several clangs of the mugs rang out in the bar before the birthday mare and her friends took a swing of their cider. 

Once the others came up for breath from their smooth drink, they could still hear the fast and deep gulps coming from Applejack as she emptied the mug of its contents. A few seconds passed before she slammed her mug on the counter, sighing out a quenched and satisfied sigh. 

“Wow, Applejack!” Pinkie exclaimed at her fellow earth pony’s little chugging show. “Sometimes I forget that you can drink like that.”

“What can Ah say? Mah picture ain’t on there just because Ah’m a regular here you know.”  Applejack said with a hoof pointed at the wall to a picture of her sitting next to numerous emptied mugs, holding a half full one and smiling with Rainbow Dash passed out on the counter. She too was surrounded by numerous emptied mugs. 

Rainbow’s snorted a bit as her eyes narrowed slightly. “I hate losing.” 

“If it’s anything, Dash,” Applejack started, “you’re the only pony Ah know that came close.” 

“Close only counts in horseshoes, hoof grenades, and atomic weapons,” Dash argued back before facing the farm pony with a serious gaze. “I want a rematch. Now!” 

“Woah there, girl. Know what you’re gettin’ yourself into first,” Applejack teased with a smirk. 

Rainbow kept her gaze on Applejack. She wasn’t going to let up on a chance to redeem herself. Still staring at Applejack, Dash hit the counter with her hoof a few times, and Tap arrived in a matter of seconds. 

“What can I do you for?” he asked jovially. 

“Six mugs of hard cider. Me and AJ are gonna have a little contest.” Rainbow’s eyes burned with a determination that did little to intimidate the farm mare. 

“Ooh! Ooh! Can you make it nine? I wanna play!” 

Dash and Applejack turned their heads in confusion to Pinkie’s direction, seeing her bounce in place in her chair. 

“Ugh… okay, I guess nine,” Dash corrected.

“Make it twelve.” 

The attention switched to Spike as he seated himself to the other three contenders. 

Rainbow Dash’s expression switched from surprise to her well known cocky grin. “Okay, twelve then. Not everyday I get to take down an Apple and a dragon in a little drinking game.” Rainbow turned her head to face her other three friends seated at the bar. “You guys wanna join in?” 

Fluttershy, Twilight, and Rarity all gave quick nods of rejection, clearly not wanting anything to do with this. 

“Suit yourself,” Rainbow shrugged off. 

Tap filled the mugs and gave the three mares and dragon three mugs each. “Consider these on the house too. I get the feeling after this, there’s gonna be more of these little contests.” He couldn’t have been more right, but for now, the focus was on the four friends. The tension between Dash and Applejack was fierce. Pinkie obliviously stared off at the foam coming from her mugs while Spike held his own cocky grin, sure that he’d win this. 

Silence hung around them for a few seconds more until Tap announced the starting word. “GO!” 

Foam flew as mugs were lifted and downed. Twilight, Rarity, and Fluttershy watched as their friends throats move up and down as the cider fell down it’s path. Applejack and Rainbow Dash were neck and neck in their little race, slamming down their first mug and moving onto their second in a matter of seconds. Pinkie gulped her first mug down in a good time, but with a mind like Pinkie’s, it wasn’t unbelievable that she distracted herself by playing with the ring of foam covering her mouth. Next to the distracted pony, Spike downed his mug just as fast as Dash and Applejack, moving onto his second as well. 

Even though two more of their friends were racing against them, Applejack and Rainbow Dash focused more on one another. Chugs were heard and in a matter of seconds, they slammed their second mug on the table and reached over for the third one. Rainbow chugged and chugged, thinking she’d gained the upper hoof. 

“Drink! Drink! Drink! Dri- ACK!”

Cider spewed from Rainbow Dash’s mouth from a sudden force, covering the bar counter. Dash coughed sporadically as she beat on her chest with her hoof. When she recovered, she heard the distinct and hope-crushing sound of a mug clanging on the bar. 

“Done!” 

Loss settled in and Rainbow Dash shot Applejack a blank glare, meeting the farm mare’s smirk and the sound of Spike’s mug crashing down on the bar. 

“Done!” 

Rainbow just sat there, bringing her mug back to her lips and mindlessly sipped away until her mug was empty. “Done,” she said flatly. 

An orange hoof met Rainbow Dash’s back in a series of pats. “C’mon, Dash. Ah know you hate losin’, but at least you did better than Pinkie.” 

The pink mare in question was muzzle deep in her second mug of cider, moving her head all around as if she was scraping the edges of the mug. Her head came up with cider and foam dripping down her face. “I got all the foam!” 

Eyes rolled before a few laughs were shared among the group and a full mug was shoved in front of Applejack’s face. 

“Want it, Applejack?” Pinkie asked.

“Sure. Thanks, Pink.” Just like the last four mugs, Applejack downed this one in a short amount of time as her friends watched in amazement. 

“You know, I like a mare that can handle her drinks.” 

Applejack’s eyes widened as she recognized the piercing voice she had hoped she wouldn’t see tonight. ‘Dammit.’ Slowly, she spun her head around to see a hulking grey earth pony stallion with two more stallions of equal height and build standing beside him. One, a red pegasus, and the other, a pale blue earth pony. “What do you want, Hard Trot?” she asked with an edginess embedded in her voice.

“Woah there, cowpony. Me, Razor Wing, and Patch Work were just hanging around when we heard your name and something about a birthday, and thought we’d swing by.” His half-lidded eyes and smug eyebrows oozed an overconfidence that could make anypony sick. “Aaaand maybe see if you’d like to swing on by my place and celebrate in another way.”

Images of the grey stallion on his back with several hoof indentions in his face and grabbing at his nether regions flashed in Applejack’s mind that kept her from going ballistic right then and there. She hated running into Hard Trot and his friends, and it was always the same cycle for the last few months. He’d come over to her, try to work something slightly relevant to her life right before trying to hit on her in ways that should’ve landed him in the morgue by her hoof long ago, but she wasn’t that far over the edge… yet. 

Spike and the girls all had a disgusted looks on their faces and only wished the trio of stallions would disappear when they saw the irritation Applejack was showing. 

With a small breath, and a false smile, Applejack gave a hard glare at Hard Trot. “Hard Trot, how long have you been tryin’ with me?” 

“A while now,” he answered, the confidence in his voice not wavering.

“And how many times have Ah left you in the dust?” 

A gripping silence hung around the two groups for a few seconds. Razor Wing and Patch Work even seemed surprised at Applejack’s words. They stood there, wondering if Hard Trot would keep up his smug demeanour. 

“I lost count, but I don’t give up.” 

“No you don’t,” came the ugly truth Applejack wished she could actually lie about. “But get this, me and you… not for a million bits and all the stensons in Equestria.” 

Applejack hoped that she finally shattered the stallion’s wall of overconfidence and cockiness, hoped she finally got it through his iron-wall thick head. She could at least say she did one of those things. 

Hard Trot gave a simple shrug, but kept his grin. “Alrighty then. I’ll leave you alone.” 

‘Oh thank, Celestia and Luna.’ 

“Because there’s five fine looking mares all around you.”

‘Dammit!’ 

Before Applejack could even begin to speak against the stallion’s implied idea, Hard Trot, and his two friends, found themselves a place next one of the girls; Hard Trot taking a seat right between Rarity and a disguised Twilight, Razor Wing standing beside Rainbow Dash, and Patch Work besides Pinkie. All three of them let their eyebrows dance on their heads as they tried to woo the mares they sat beside. 

“You know, I’ve been known to give unicorn mares a real nice time,” Hard Trot grinned devilishly. Twilight and Rarity easily felt sick at the stallion’s effort, but it only enraged the dragon sitting a few seats away. 

“Hey! That’s my sister and fiance!” Spike snarled through gritted fangs. Hard Trot, for the first time that night, kept quiet and slowly backed away from the two unicorns while his two friends continued their own efforts trying to score, but ultimately, and expectantly, falling flat. 

“Screw off, scum bag, I’m engaged.” A flare of her cyan wings revealed the band around a few of Rainbow Dash’s feathers, instantly stopping Razor Wing in his attempt. 

“Sorry, colt. I’m taken as well,” Pinkie smiled before turning away from Patch Work. 

Three were taken, one wasn’t going to give him the light of day, and he sure as hell wasn’t going to try and go for the dragon with razor sharp teeth’s sister, which left one mare Hard Trot still had a shot with. With a regained overconfidence, the grey stallion made his way to the edge of the bar where Fluttershy sat. She instantly shrunk down in her seat and averted his eyes when he stood in front of her. 

“You’re lookin’ good, girl. How’s about you and me head on over to my place for a few drinks?” 

Fluttershy shrunk down even more in her seat, trying her best to become invisible. “Um, no thanks. I’ve already had a drink” she squeaked. 

“Then we could just go straight over to my place,” Hard Trot pressed on, showing no sign of letting up. 

“Um, no, that’s fine. Thanks anyway.” Fluttershy’s weak answer was barely audible over the sounds around the bar. 

“Dude! Back off! She said no,” Dash hollered at the stallion mere centimeters from her friend. 

Completely ignoring the irritated Wonderbolt, Hard Trot pressed on with his offer. “C’mon, I’ve got a nice place, a soft bed, and the two of us would look pretty good in there.” 

If Fluttershy could shrink any further into her seat, she might as well have been the chair. “No, thanks,” she barely whispered. 

“Trot! Leave Fluttershy alone!” Applejack roared, getting out of her seat and stomping on the floor. 

“C’mon. A pretty mare like you, a strong stallion like me, we could have a real nice time.” His hoof started to rise and ended on one of Flutterhsy’s forelimbs, eliciting a fearful *Eep! from the shy pegasus. 

That did it. Spike and the girls all boiled with rage at the stubborn stallion’s inability to screw off. They each stood up, ready to rid their friend of her problem, until something unexpected happened. 

Fluttershy shot right up in her seat and hollered at the top of her voice. “NO MEANS NO! YOU CAN’T HAVE MY BODY!” From under her light yellow wings, concealed and held by some of her thicker feathers, Fluttershy grabbed a little container. A long hissing sound was heard and the next thing everypony knew, Hard Trot was lying on the ground, hollering in pain as he held his hooves to his burning red eyes. 

“Trot!” Razor Wing and Patch Work yelped as they saw their friend on the ground, writhing in in pain. 

“What’s wrong with you you little—” Steel Wing’s rage filled outburst was cut short when a white hoof met the side of his face with a loud smacking sound. 

“What’s wrong with her?!?” Rarity asked in total anger. “What’s wrong with your friend?!? And what’s wrong with you for trying to call Fluttershy out you brute!” 

Razor Wing’s held his slapped cheek as he looked down on the unicorn who didn’t back down from the large pegasus stallion. “You better watch it, priss! Or I’m gonna—” Before he could finish, Razor Wing felt a small series of taps on his back. He turned around to see a very pissed off purple and green dragon standing above him. Before he even had a chance to react, Spike’s fist collided into his face, sending him back a good distance away. 

“No one threatens my little Gemstone.” 

“Ooh, my Spikey-Wikey!” Rarity gushed as she leapt into her dragon’s arms. 

Patch Work took notice of Spike’s distraction and decided to go in. He made a close to silent break behind the dragon and was ready to pounce... at least until he felt a strong tug on his black and grey tail that spun him around to face the fiery-eyed birthday mare. 

Like the earth pony was one of the trees on the orchard, Applejack quickly reared on her front hooves, and let her back legs collide into Patch Work’s jaw, sending him to the side of the bar like a cannon ball. He fell with a loud *THUD, still breathing, but definitely unconscious. Razor Wing too was passed out from Spike’s blow while Hard Trot was still grabbing at his eyes, moaning in agony for any kind of relief for the fire in his eyes. 

Calmly, and oh so satisfied, Applejack trotted back to the gang and stood next to a shaking Fluttershy. “You okay, sugarcube?” 

It took a few seconds, but Fluttershy nodded shakily that she was fine. “Ye-Ye-Yeah. I’m alright.” Her nerves easily started to fade when the others started to come to her side. She put away her pepper spray container back in her feathers and hopped off her seat.

“C’mon, guys, let’s get outta here.” 

Easily agreeing with Applejack’s plan, the gang made their way to the exit. Applejack just had to be sure with one thing. “You sure you’re alright, Fluttershy?” 

“Yeah,” Fluttershy answered, but a quick look back at the bar made her rethink that. “Actually, give me second.” 

On his back, Hard Trot was rubbing his hooves over his eyes, desperate for a way to alleviate his pain, and it was working a little. When he removed his hooves over his eyes, the last thing he expected to see was the yellow-coated pegasus standing in front of him… on her back legs… like she was ready to pound down on something. 

“OOOOOHHHHH!!!” came his holler of pain as he curled himself into a ball, his front legs grabbing down, and his back legs crossed like it would help. 

Quick as she came, Fluttershy left the injured stallion and returned to her friends. “Now I’m alright.” 

The nighttime breeze blew through Luna’s starry sky when the group of seven walked out of the bar, all laughing loudly after Fluttershy’s blow to Hard Trot’s stallionhood. 

“Woo boy, he’s gonna need ice for about a month,” laughed Applejack as she held her stomach. 

“Did you see his face when Fluttershy came came down!?” Rainbow asked loudly before imitating Hard Trot’s pain-stricken face. “Nice aim back there, Fluttershy.” 

“Thanks, Rainbow Dash,” she quietly said before turning her head to Applejack. “Sorry that those three ruined your birthday, Applejack.” 

“Are you kiddin’? Ah finally got to see Hard Trot get what was comin’ to him. Ah wanted to kick his sorry flank for so long, but you stompin’ on his junk is just as good. Hay, it’s better. Best gift in Equestria by the way.” 

“Oh, well, um, happy to help.” 

“And, Spike. Nice punch by the way,” Applejack said to the dragon. 

“Nice buck to the face. You think they’ll be alright though?” 

“Ahhh, they’ll bounce back, they always do,” she sighed dryly. “At least they know not to mess with me or you guys.” 

“I simply cannot believe they way they tried to come onto us!” Rarity gasped with a hoof to her chest. “‘I’ve been known to give unicorn mare’s a real nice time.’ What sort of mare falls for that?” 

“One without a brain,” Twilight answered dryly before turning to Applejack. “So, do you want to call it a night, Applejack?” 

“You kiddin’? This is the most fun Ah’ve had in weeks! Let’s keep it rollin’.” 

Pinkie bounced in the air screaming with joy. “Woooo-Hoooo! Party still on! So, what do you wanna do, Applejack?” 

Nothing came to the farm mare’s mind and she drew a blank. “Huh. Ah don’t know. What should we do?” 

Spike and the girls pondered options in their minds until a Rainbow Dash flew into the air above her friend’s heads. “How about Twilight ditch the disguise, fire up the cloud walking spell and we all head over to my place and get drunk.” 

The cheers on the ground solidified Rainbow Dash’s plan, and with a spark of her horn, Twilight’s disguise and Apple Bloom’s jacket disappeared in a flash. Her lavender aura surrounded all the non-fliers as the spell took effect. Minutes later, all seven were in the air, flying or carried by somepony towards Rainbow’s mansion for a night of drinks. 


***


She wasn’t drunk. That was for sure. Even with five mugs of cider and a multitude of other assorted drinks from Rainbow Dash’s place in her system, Applejack still managed to walk on all fours with very little trouble and only a little bit of dizziness. Call it the old Apple tolerance, or just plain luck. Whichever it was, it didn’t stop her from reaching home. 

“Granny? Mac? Apple Bloom? Any ya’ll still awake?” Her whispers went unanswered for a few moments as she quietly stepped into the farmhouse. “Anypony?” 

“AJ? That you?” Applejack instantly recognized the voice of her Granny. A second later, a light flipped on in the kitchen, and Applejack followed it. 

By the fridge, stood the tired old mare, supported by her walker. “How was your night?” 

“It was… it was great,” Applejack answered with a small laugh and a content sigh. Granny Smith took notice of her granddaughter’s half-lidded eyes, and the slight movement of her body from side to side. 

“Ah can tell, but you’re still standin’, so Ah’m guessin’ you didn’t hit the bottles too hard.”

“Apple Family tolerance. Honest to betsy, Ah can’t even remember the last time Ah was full on drunk.” 

Granny slipped a quiet laugh as she leaned into her walker. “Neither can Ah, AJ, but it’s nice to see you had a good time.”

“Yeah. Thanks for gettin’ me out there tonight, Granny.” 

“Ahhh, you needed it anyway. Now c’mon, help me back upstairs. Only reason Ah’m down here so late is because Ah forgot the dang denture paste.”

After the painfully slow process of getting Granny Smith upstairs was over, the two mares were in the hallway that contained all of their rooms, Granny’s being the closest to the stairs. Why she refused to move downstairs was an ongoing mystery that just got chalked up to stubborness. 

“Thanks, AJ. Now go on and get to bed. Oh! And happy birthday, sugarcube.” 

“Thanks, Granny. And uh, just wodnerin’... how’d Lucky Clover and Caramel do?” 

“Oh they were just fine. Mac and Apple Bloom had to help them out a bit, but they got the hang of it. Just don’t worry about it, everything got done.” 

Even after all those drinks, Applejack was still worried about the farm, but Granny’s news quickly dashed those worries. “Alright then. Night, Granny.” 

“Night, AJ. Oh! Before Ah forget, one of them left you a little somethin’ in your room before they left.”

Pecking at her interest, Applejack couldn’t help but ask. “Who? And left what?” 

Granny Smith answered with turn towards her open bedroom and a simple, “Go and find out,” before closing the door. 

Now really intrigued, Applejack opened the door to her own room to find a letter on her bed. She closed the door to her room and walked to the bed to see what it said. 

“Applejack. I called out to you before you left with your friends, but I don’t think you heard me, so I just wanted to say Happy birthday before I left. Well, I guess I kinda did leave without telling you, but, you know. So… yeah, happy birthday and everything. Sorry if I sound a little nervous, but I kinda wanted to ask you something, but you left before… ugh… you know. Let me start over. I see you in town a lot, and I think you’re really pretty and nice whenever I bump into you in town, so I was wondering if maybe you’d like to go out sometime. I run the horse shoe store in town, and I’m there a lot, so, I don’t know. Maybe come by if you say yes? Sweet Celestia and Luna I must sound really weird in this letter. Well, you know, if yes, you know where I am. Ugh, happy birthday again, Applejack!

- Caramel.” 

Applejack just had to reread the letter again from the tan stallion. She couldn’t help but chuckle a little at the nervousness in Caramel’s writing. It was cute in a way. “Hmmm, should Ah?” she thought aloud. She hadn’t really thought about romance for quite some time. Her run in with Hard Trot and his friends in the past dulled out a lot of the good thoughts she had about dating, but seeing this letter from Caramel gave her another perspective. That, or it could be the slightly impaired judgement from tonight’s round of drinks. 

Applejack set the letter on the nightstand next to her bed before slipping under the covers. “Eh, Ah’ll deal with it later.” 


***



Present Day



***


“And that ‘Ah’ll deal with it later’, turned into a week before Caramel came back to the farm and asked me out. Ah seriously couldn’t find the letter the next morning, and Ah couldn’t remember half of what was on it.” 

“And, four years later, little Miss Independent here became Mrs. Caramel,” Rainbow chimed in. 

Sweetie Belle and the rest of the former CMC could see the light redness spreading across Applejack’s face. 

“Yeah. Ah did, but what Ah was tryin’ to say to you, Sweetie Belle is that Ah wasn’t even worried about findin’ a stallion when Ah turned thirty, yet somehow, Ah ended up with one in the end. So don’t get so worked up if you're still single.”

Sweetie Belle absorbed the advice the farmer was giving her, and everypony could tell she was lifting up. A few understanding nods and a smile later, Sweetie Belle was back to enjoying birthdays. “Thanks, Applejack.” 

“Any time, Sweetie Belle.” 

“So to sum it all up,” Scootaloo spoke up, “you got a forced night off, danced, drank, got in a bar fight, drank some more, and got a love letter?” 

“Pretty much,” Applejack simply answered. 

“Great birthday,” the orange pegasus laughed. 

“So, just to recap,” Apple Bloom began as she pointed around the room, “we’ve got a meltdown and a marriage proposal, a Wonderbolt show and a crash, a night at a bar, and…” her hoof pointed and stopped when she got to the pony standing behind Applejack. “What’s your story, Fluttershy?”

“Oh, well, um, I—”

“Oh! Lemme guess,” Scootaloo piped up, “the others threw you this huge surprise party and—”

“NO!!!” All but Fluttershy, Rarity’s parents and the former CMC screamed out. 

“Are you crazy?!?” Rainbow Dash asked intensely before pointing a hoof at her fellow pegasus. “You cannot scare this mare!”


***



Twelve Years Ago



***


Winter’s cold grip nipped at the creme-coated pegasus’s ears as she trotted up the path to her house. Fluttershy grabbed for the knob and gave it a turn. She couldn’t wait to greet her animal friends and get into her soft and warm bed. The door opened, and…

“SURPRISE!!!” 

“AAAAAGGGGGHHHHHH!!!!”

Hissing sounds and screams of immense pain rang through the cottage. Fluttershy opened her eyes to see her cottage decorated floor to ceiling in party decorations, a cake on the floor with number 2 and 5 candles sticking out, and all six of her best friends gripping their eyes and screaming in pain on the floor. 

“Oh, sweet mother of Celestia and Luna! It burns!” Rarity hollered from the floor. 

“Is this what burning feels like?!?” Spike asked loudly as he rubbed his face on the carpet. 

“It doesn’t taste like pepper at all!!!” Pinkie screamed. 

“Why do you carry pepper spray everywhere you go?!?” Applejack asked with her hooves over her eyes.

Grabbing for the cake, Rainbow Dash smothered the chunks on her eyes, thinking it would help the fire in her eyes. “We were just trying to throw you a surprise party!!!” 

Twilight grabbed a balloon and vigorously rubbed it over her eyes. “Did you think we were trying to attack you with a birthday cake?!?” 


***



Present Day



***


Spike shuttered a bit when the memory of the pain in his eyes reared its ugly head in his mind. “Hell of a party. Hell of a party.” 

Fluttershy blushed heavily and gave a weak smile as she remembered pepper spraying all of her friends that day.

“So yeah, no surprises,” Rainbow deadpanned as she shook off the memory of that particular birthday. 

“So what did she do for her thirtieth?” Apple Bloom asked again. 

“Actually, you three were there for half of it. Even Rarity’s parents were there,” Fluttershy finally answered, but only confusing the trio of friends as they looked at one another and then towards Pearl and Magnum. 

“We were?” Sweetie asked back. 

“Yeah. It was the night…”
> Perfect Surprise
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------





Perfect Surprise



Luna's full moon hung in the dark blue sky, accompanied by hundreds of stars that shined their radiant light like tiny diamonds. The starry sky swirled in its hues of dark blue and purple, creating a canvas of lunar beauty, but it was a beauty outmatched only by the mare holding everypony's attention with her new husband.

In a large, isolated garden in upper Canterlot, even as snow lightly fell, draping the still living flora in a veil of white, ponies stood around a dance floor to witness a beautiful site, a bride and groom sharing their first dance.

Tables with a pristine white cloth draped atop covered the garden grounds. All around the greenery stood finely crafted and carefully placed torches that burned strong and bright green fire, radiating the warmth felt in its creator's heart. Hanging in the trees and above everypony's heads, spherical azure lanterns illuminated their light, shining bright like their inspiration's eyes. At the center of it all, the bride and groom danced together with lovestruck gazes spread across their faces as they stared lovingly into one another. As they danced their slow and graceful dance, the mare of honor, sister of the bride, Sweetie Belle, stood on a nearby stage accompanied by a small orchestra, drums, and a piano. The sound of her bell-like voice filled the dance floor as she sung for her sister and new brother-in-law to a slow, classic, and melodious song.

"At last
My love has come along.”

Rarity, beauty like hers couldn't hope to be matched. Her dress flowed in an radiant and elegant white, accented in silver. Of course it was beautiful. She designed it. Her mane swirled in its signature style and shone a bright purple. Tenderly place around her neck rested the heart-shaped gemstone her love gave her so many years ago, probably the first real indication she had of the true feelings her new husband had for her. The bright red of the fire ruby, along with the purple of her mane, the white of her coat and dress, and the light shining off the diamond ring on her horn created an extravagant beauty nopony could hope to forget, but the one thing that shined brighter than anything else about Rarity, were her magnificent azure eyes as she looked into her new husband's emerald pools, Spike’s. 

Spike held onto Rarity like she was the most precious thing in Equestria as he danced with her in his night-black tux. Tied around his neck was something she gave him so many years ago, a bold red, jewel-encrusted bow tie. He was the dragon of the hour, dancing with the mare of the hour, and neither of them wanted it to stop. 

“I love you, Spike,” Rarity whispered lovingly as she dug her head further into Spike’s muscled chest.

“I love you too, Rarity.” 

Few had dry eyes as they watched Spike and Rarity dance, Rainbow Dash automatically known to be one of those ponies. Her, Twilight and the girls, all dressed in their bridesmares dresses, the rest of the former CMC, Celestia, Luna, and everypony else important to the newlyweds all stood by and watched the two dance away. Next to Twilight, stood the rest of her and Spike’s family. 

Dressed in his best stallion’s tux, Shining Armor held his pink-coated wife close to him as he, her, and their two foals standing next to them watched the newlyweds share their first dance as a married couple. 

“My brother’s married,” Shining breathed, not out of surprise, but in a sense of wonder that only family could feel once they saw how much the ponies, or dragon in his case, they knew throughout their lives have grown. 

Seeing his new sister-in-law and Spike still dancing brought out a flood of memories to a similar occasion. Shining turned to his wife, her tri-colored mane once again jeweled out for a special occasion. “Takes you back, huh, Cadance?” 

Cadance looked up to meet Shining Armor’s moist eyes with her own damp ones. “Yeah,” she breathed with a nod and a wide smile. Cadance felt a tug on her dress and looked down to find the light-blue eyes of her youngest child, a young pegasus colt with a teal coat and jet black mane, Sky Dive. 

“Mama, is Uncle Spike gonna live happily ever after with Aunt Rarity?” 

“They sure are, Sky Dive,” Cadance simply answered. On her other side, her eldest child, a unicorn filly slightly older than Sky Dive with a pale-lavender coat and an updone bright pink mane, danced in place in her flower filly’s dress to Sweetie Belle’s song. “What are you thinking about, Heartfelt?” 

Heartfelt turned to face her mother with her bright purple eyes and a quivering smile. “Uncle Spike looks so happy.” 

Cadance really didn’t want to cry now, but her daughter’s words finally did it, so she made no point in fighting the joyous tears that came down her cheek. “He does, sweety. Him and Rarity.” 

Muffled sniffing sounds and small sobs were the only thing coming out of the grey-coated unicorn mare standing next to Shining Armor. Her mane was a striped pattern of white and light purple, and her crystal-blue eyes glistened behind a veil of tears. Beside the mare, her blue-coated unicorn husband with a perfectly quaffed dark-blue mane and gold-yellow eyes held her close as they watched their youngest child dance with their newest daughter-in-law. 

“Our son’s married, Night Light,” the mare sobbed again with a proud smile. 

Night Light brought his wife in closer as he stared at his son with proud eyes. “I know, Velvet. I know.” 

The next few minutes passed with joyous tears, wide smiles, and a few sobs from Twilight Velvet until the last few lines of Sweetie Belle’s song.

“For you are mine… 
At last.”  

Strings, a piano, and light drums rang throughout the gardens for a few more seconds until coming to a hault. Their dance ended, and Spike took his chance to plant the second kiss of the night on Rarity’s lips. The crowd clapped hooves and stomped on the ground for the two lovebirds. 

Rainbow Dash and Pinkie cheered the loudest out of the crowd. Applejack busied herself with hoofing Twilight more tissues to wipe away her tears as Fluttershy tried her best to keep her own tears of untold happiness from falling. The cream-colored pegasus’s cerulean eyes never left her newly married friends, and her smile never faltered even by the slightest centimeter. Before she knew it, she felt a soft bump from a purple forelimb to her shoulder. Realizing she must have zoned out, Fluttershy snapped her attention to her side to meet Twilight’s partially dried eyes. The alicorn wore a grateful smile as her eyes tried to stay dry.

“Thanks so much for giving them this, Fluttershy.” 

The princess’s forelimb left the pegasus’s shoulder, and Fluttershy returned her own smile. “Of course, Twilight. Those two deserve it.” 

When the wave of claps and stomps started to dissipate, Sweetie Belle brought the mic up to her muzzle. “The bride and groom, everypony,” she said with a gesture of her forelimb. “Rarity, sis, the moment I heard you and Spike had started dating, I knew he’d be the one you were gonna marry, and as I stand here, I can honestly say I’ve never been so happy for you in my whole life.” Tears strolled down Sweetie Belle’s face as she gave her speech. “I hope you and Spike live a long and happy life together, even though I already know you will. I also hope you two can make me an aunt in the next few years,” she continued, the last part followed by a light chuckle from her and the crowd of ponies. “So, before I start bawling my eyes out for you guys, I’m gonna turn the mic over to somepony else.” Sweetie looked over to one side of the dance floor and met eyes with Pinkie and Twilight, both knowing the plan behind the unicorn’s eyes. 

In a blur of pink, Pinkie zipped to the other side of the dance floor to the DJ station and pulled out a white unicorn mare with a dual-colored electric blue mane and purple shades from under the station. How exactly Pinkie summoned the pony from there was a mystery, but with how long her friends have known the pink pony, no one bothered to ask. The white unicorn placed a record on the machine, and a beat started to play. 

“Let’s get this party started!” Pinkie cheered from the DJ station.

Across the floor, Sweetie Belle flung the mic to her side, for it to be caught in the familiar shade of Twilight’s magic. 

“Love is in bloom...” 


***


“Alright then. Sweetie Belle, get a little closer to Rarity and your ma. Mrs. Velvet, could you take a step back? Shining, Ah need you closer to Spike and Cadance. Heartfelt, get closer to your pa. Sky Dive, pretend to like your sister and get closer.” Applejack’s instructions piled onto the two families, now joined as one, in her attempt to get them into the perfect picture positions as she stood behind an old camera a few feet away.

Spike and Rarity held onto each other in the center. Magnum, Pearl, and Sweetie Belle gathered together to Rarity’s right as Twilight, Twilight Velvet, Night Light, Shining Armor, Cadance, Sky Dive, and Heartfelt shuffled themselves around to Spike’s left. A few more adjustments and the group of twelve stood ready. 

“Perfect, y’all. Now, one… two… three!” A flash went off, and the resulting picture would later serve to be one of the two all of those in the pose would cherish forever. “There you guys go! The whole family in one pretty little picture,” Applejack beamed. 

“Not quite the whole family,” Spike corrected. Applejack’s confusion lasted only a second before the warm smiles of her friends connected the dots for her. Behind her, Fluttershy, Pinkie, and Rainbow Dash brushed past her to find a spot in the family picture. Twilight’s lavender aura surrounded the camera, releasing Applejack of her duty and free to find a spot in the picture. 

The group shuffled a few seconds more until they stood in their picture perfect pose. Twilight’s magic held the old camera and readied the button. “Okay, one… two… three!” Another flash went off, forever preserving the image of pure happiness felt by the group of sixteen. 

“Make sure to send that to us when it develops, okay, Spike,” Twilight Velvet nearly begged of her son. 

“Same with us, Rarity,” Pearl added in. 

Spike and Rarity gave their assurances, but it did little to stop the oncoming affection that came their way from the rest of the group. It was expected, being a wedding and all, but the force it came with was another story. Magnum, Pearl, and Sweetie Belle practically crushed the bride in their group embrace. Twilight, the girls, Cadance, her foals, Twilight Velvet, and Night Light had the awkward pleasure of watching Shining Armor try to give his bigger little brother a nudge on the top of his spinned head, but ultimately coming short of his goal, literally. Shining Armor was forced to rear on his hind legs just to even try his brotherly assault, but by then, Spike figured out what Shining was trying to get at. 

Spike wrapped an arm around Shining’s neck and rubbed his fist into his brother’s electric-blue mane. “Nice try, Shining.” 

“Aw, c’mon! It should be the other way around!” Shining’s protest only made the fist on his head rub harder and the eyes of his parents roll. 

“Our boys,” Twilight Velvet breathed.

Cadance giggled and gave a slight nudge to Rarity. “Our guys.” Rarity playfully rolled her eyes and let out a small laugh. 

“When you guys are done,” Twilight cut in, “Spike, we still need you for that thing, remember?” 

Spike’s noogie ceased and he released Shining Armor from his grasp. Twilight and most of the girls all bore eager smiles for what they had planned, all except a very confused Fluttershy. 

“What thing?” the shy pegasus asked. 

“Oh you’ll see, just follow us,” Rainbow Dash ensured as she lead Fluttershy away to another area on the garden grounds as Pinkie followed the pegasi, bouncing. 

“You three comin’ or what?” Applejack called to Twilight and the newlyweds. 

“We’ll be there,” Twilight called back. Turning her attention back to her brothers, she gestured Spike to follow. 

“We’ll be back soon,” Rarity assured her parents and sister. 

“Us too,” Twilight and Spike said to their loved ones. 

“Don’t worry yourselves. Just tell Fluttershy thank you for us,” Pearl called out to her departing daughter. 

“Us too!” Velvet added in as she saw Spike and Twilight leave with Rarity. 

“We will!” Twilight called back, already a good distance away from her parents. 

The trio made their way through the garden area, past filled tables and ponies giving their congratulations to Spike and Rarity, to a large table set in the back of the garden beside a large willow tree far enough away from the epicenter of the wedding and its guests. Already sitting in the chairs, the rest of the girls centered around Fluttershy and made room for Twilight, Spike, and Rarity to join in. 

All Fluttershy saw were the barely contained smiles all her friends had plastered on their faces, and it was starting to weird her out. “Um, what is this all about?” 

Her friends faced each other and gave nods that signified a plan she knew nothing of. The next thing Fluttershy knew, Pinkie dove under the table and pulled out a tray yellow-frosted vanilla cupcakes, thirty to be exact. Each cupcake held its own candle and a small pink butterfly painted in frosting, the perfect treats for somepony’s birthday. 

Fluttershy looked up from the frosted treats to see Pinkie take a deep breath before she and the others started singing the birthday song to her. Toward the middle of the short song, Fluttershy picked up on a few more deeper voices joining in. She spun her head around to see most of the girls’ coltfriends come out from behind the willow tree with various-sized wrapped boxes in their hooves. Caramel, Soarin, and a bright-orange pegasus stallion with a windblown blue mane, Flash Sentry, all dressed in tuxes for the wedding, trotted to the table and laid their gifts on the table and took to each of their respective marefriends while singing to Fluttershy. 

“Happy birthday dear, Fluttershy. Happy birthday to you!” 

Normally, she would have shrunk to the size of a cell at the attention she was receiving, but knowing it was from her six best friends and their special someponies, Fluttershy beamed at the celebration they put on for her. “Wow, thanks guys. You really shouldn’t have done this.” 

“Oh, but we had to, darling,” Rarity gasped. “If it weren’t for you, this whole thing wouldn’t have happened!” she exclaimed with a gesture of her hoof that circled the wedding area. 

In all honesty, it was because of Fluttershy that Spike and Rarity’s wedding had a chance of happening that night. 

Planning for the wedding went into overdrive a few weeks after Rainbow Dash’s birthday a few months ago, and one major bump in the road impacted the plans like a freight train. Spike’s only major desires for the wedding were that Sky Dive got to be the ring bearer, Heartfelt, the flower filly, and Shining Armor, his best stallion, all of which Rarity agreed with without a second thought. Every other aspect of the wedding was all Rarity’s to play with. Spike never really had much else to say about where or when they could get married. Just as long as it meant he got to spend the rest of his life with the mare of his dreams, he would have gone with anything, but one thing him and Rarity both wanted was a night wedding. The idea of stars dancing in the sky, Luna’s full moon shining over them, it was enchanting to say the least. 

Rarity spent most of the time with Twilight and Pinkie in plans for the wedding. Rarity’s intricate details for the wedding, Twilight’s analytical and detail-oriented mind, and Pinkie’s questionable ability to set events up made the perfect wedding planning team, but all of their abilities put together couldn’t have prepared them for the major bump in the road they faced. 

Rarity, for a while then, knew exactly where she wanted to get married, the same place her parents did nearly thirty five years ago. It may not have been the royal wedding she used to fantasize about, but ever since meeting the stallion that brutally shattered those wild dreams, she quickly changed her dreams to ones that would have a more meaningful impact. And to wed in the same place that joined her parents for so long, who still remained happy together, it meant the world to her, but all that sentiment never stopped that garden from becoming a wedding hot spot. 

That one garden, that one beautiful garden in Canterlot with flora of unmentionable beauty gained popularity among soon-to-be-married couples over the years, and weddings became a normal occurrence. Bookings for couples’ special days grew to monstrous numbers, and only a few days were left before the greenery of the garden would begin to wilt from winter’s grasp. Spike and Rarity would’ve been perfectly fine waiting a few more months for the flowers to bloom again, but of course, fate pulled a cruel card on them. Couples had reserved dates long ago that booked the next Spring and deep into the year. The only dates that remained were the ones dangerously close to the very end of Winter, dates that would give them a wedding without half of their intended guests. It was either a tour date for Sweetie Belle, a pre-assigned royal duty for Twilight, a show for Rainbow Dash, and many other things that couldn’t have been rearranged. 

Rarity and Spike started to accept that their perfect day would just have to be farther down the road, at least until Fluttershy decided to step in. Without taking no for an answer, she offered the only day out of those few days in Winter available that would allow every potential guest to attend, her birthday. 

Spike’s words cut Fluttershy’s thoughts short and brought her attention on the groom. “Fluttershy, you gave me and Rarity our perfect day. There’s no way we could ever repay you.” 

“You know you don’t need to. You’re two of my best friends! Of course I want to see you guys get married. Plus, I’ll have more birthdays. You two only get one wedding.”

“Yeah, but you only turn thirty once,” Spike pointed out, earning a gasp from Pinkie as her eyes widened at a realization.

“Oh my gosh!” Pinkie gasped. “Fluttershy’s thirty! That’s four down, and three to go!” 

Fluttershy found herself grasped in a one-armed embrace from Applejack as she congratulated the pegasus. “Welcome to the club, Fluttershy.” Rarity and Rainbow Dash crowded the new newest member of the, now established, “Thirty Club”, in a group embrace with Rainbow Dash at the edge farthest edge of the group hug. 

It was no surprise she’d be the one to break the hug first and set ravenous, magenta eyes on the cupcakes on the table. “Well what are we waiting for? Let’s dig into these bad boys.”   

Hooves and claws reached out for the cupcakes that found their way into everyone’s mouths. Moans of delight sounded off from everyone, as expected from any dessert made by Pinkie. 

“I still don’t know how you can top yourself with every batch, Pinkie,” Rainbow Dash wondered aloud through large bites. 

“It’s easy when you do it for friends,” Pinkie replied like it was the most obvious thing in the world. 

“Well, I must say, Pinkie,” Rarity begun after swallowing, “you also outdid yourself with the wedding cake. I’ve never tasted anything so magnificent!” 

“I just revamped the MMMM to be honest.” Pinkie’s eyes brightened all of a sudden before quickly turning her head to face Rainbow Dash and Soarin. “Oooh! Maybe I can try something new for your wedding, guys.” 

Soarin and Rainbow Dash exchanged nervous glances for a second before Soarin tried to explain. “Actually, Pinkie…”

“We probably won’t need a cake,” Rainbow Dash finished. 

“Why ever not, Rainbow Dash?” Rarity couldn’t help but ask. 

“Weeeeell.” How was she going to say this, especially to Rarity. “Me and Soarin don’t really want a big wedding.”

As expected, Rarity gasped like she heard the dirtiest bit of gossip. 

“We were just gonna head down to Las Pegasus, have a quick wedding, then hit the casinos and hope all of you guys would come.” 

“But, Rainbow Dash! Las Pegasus?!?” 

“What? You should know by now I’m not into all that. Plus, the whole big wedding thing really isn’t for us, right, Soarin?” 

“Yeah. I just never really got the whole wedding blowout thing,” he answered truthfully. “Plus, we figured we’d have some fun right after, and a just married couple at the slots… gotta have some luck right?” 

Nods and affirming murmurs spread around the group at Soarin’s logic, for lack of a better word. 

“Well, as long as we get to see you two get married,” Rarity sighed out. “And that you get to see Spike and I win every game and machine you two try.” 

“That a challenge?” Rainbow Dash taunted playfully. 

“Won’t be much of a challenge,” the fashionista playfully smirked. 

“Okay, you’re on, Rares. Soarin, make sure we whoop these two when we go to Las Pegasus.” 

“Speakin’ of which,” Applejack cut in, “when do you two wanna head over there?” 

“We were thinking next month actually,” Soarin answered. 

“Okay. Count all of us in, right guys?” 

The table roared with cheers and hopes for the next couple in the group to get married.

“While we’re talkin’ of ponies gettin’ hitched, Twilight? Flash?” The ponies in question could’ve sworn their hearts stopped a second when they picked up on where Applejack was going with her words. “When are you guys finally gonna tie the knot?” Her tone may have been teasing, but it was a genuine question. 

Twilight and Flash Sentry shuffled around on their hooves as they mumbled incoherently. 

“We’re just trying to—”

“I don’t want her to feel—”

“I don’t want to ru—”

“I don’t want a repeat of—”

“It’s not like we won’t, but—”

“We just need to—”

They knew it was a little mean to find humor in it, but seeing the two stumble over their words like they did brought out some muffled giggles to everypony at the table. Spike and the girls knew perfectly well why Twilight was ringless. All of them were present for more than half of the trainwrecks of proposals Flash had tried to dish out. 

Once Twilight and Flash truly started dating almost five years ago, after he got promoted to the Canterlot Royal Guard after five years of guarding the Crystal Empire palace, and after two years of awkward back and forth attempts on both their parts to try something before that, it wasn’t long before the group really got to see Flash Sentry’s true self come out. The calm and collected persona he painted for himself quickly fell away to reveal a more nervous, but still kind-hearted pony underneath. For some reason, Twilight managed to make him trip up a lot, and he the same with her, but after those five years of dating, and after professing love to one another, marriage became a topic on both their minds, and Flash wanted his proposal to be perfect for his dream mare. 

Unfortunately, every attempt ended in ways he wished he could forget. It was either she swallowed the ring that was in the wine glass, the waiter accidentally spilling their dinner over them, an unnoticed alligator in the lake, or the really weird one, a pot, anvil, piano, and cart crashing down on them from the sky.

It had gotten to the point where Twilight even tried to propose. Her way though… well… there was a reason Spike was always the one that cooked when they lived in Ponyville. 

“Guys, Ah’m just messin’ with you, but tell us when it happens, okay?” 

Twilight and Flash simply shuffled around a little bit more before finally agreeing with Applejack. Deep down, they knew it would happen, they just didn’t know how. 

Rainbow Dash, after calming down from her fits of laughter, checked around the table to find someone was missing. Her and everypony else that had one stood by their special someponies, except one. “Hey, Pinkie, where’s your guy? I saw him standing with our guys at the ceremony.”

“Oh, Fluttershy asked him to pop back to Ponyville real quick to check on Angel Jr. and the other animals at her cottage. He’ll be back in a few minutes… Actually, if he pops back, can one of you tell him I went to the bathroom.” 

It was then that Rainbow Dash noticed Pinkie’s crossed limbs and the in-place bounces. “Will do, Pinkie.” 

“Thanks!” Pinkie sprinted towards the bathroom at the entrance of the gardens and left the group to gawk at the speed Pinkie put in and the pink trail she left behind.

“Never a dull moment with her is there?” Caramel joked, already familiar with Pinkie’s tendencies. 

“Eenope, and Ah think that’s why Discord likes her so much,” Applejack answered with a chuckle. 

“Wonder what their kids are gonna look like,” Spike threw in slyly.

“What are your kids gonna look like?” Applejack retorted, forcing the group to go into their own fits of laughter. When the laughs settled down, Spike and Rarity shuffled around a bit. 

“That’s at least a good few years from now,” Rarity answered. “But it is going to happen. Plus, my mother would just have a heart attack if I told her she would never get to be a grandmother.” 

“Oh, your mom would have a heart attack?” Twilight interjected. “Shining’s already in the clear, but if either me or Spike don’t have kids of our own, she’d have a heart attack, die, and her spirit would skin the one that doesn’t have kids alive.” 

“And then squish what ever was skinned like ants,” Spike added in fearfully. The younger two of the Sparkle kids shuddered in horror as the thoughts of Twilight Velvet’s spirit disemboweling them strutted across their minds. They knew their mother exaggerated what she’d do if she didn’t get to be a grandmother to all three of her children’s kids, but the fear still remained. 

The talk of their mothers brought something back to Twilight, Spike, and Rarity’s minds… they promised to check back with them. 

“Oh my, we forgot about our parents!” Rarity gasped. 

“Do you wanna head back real quick?” Fluttershy spoke up to the best of her ability. 

“We should…” Twilight hesitated to answer as something beautiful hit her eardrums. The music from the dancefloor slowed down and the torches and lanterns dimmed to set a more intimate mood. A song started as the notes of chimes and a piano echoed throughout the gardens, simply beautiful. “... buuuuut,” Twilight continued as she started to sway to the gentle rhythm. “I really like this song.” Twilight’s gaze turned to the orange pegasus standing next to her. He got the message and offered his hoof.

“May I have this dance?” Flash asked with a bow.

With a giggle, Twilight took her coltfriend’s hoof and followed him to the dance floor. 

Following Flash’s example, Spike offered a claw to his wife and bowed. “Shall we… Mrs. Dragon?” 

Rarity’s cheeks reddened slightly at the name. The reality of her dream coming true was still finding her, but it didn’t stop her from taking Spike’s offer to dance. “Let’s.” 

The rest of the group at the table looked onto the newlyweds and couldn’t help but smile for them. Upon closer inspection of her friends, Fluttershy noticed that their eyes never left the two couples dancing. She could see the hidden desire in their eyes to dance with their special someponies. Even Rainbow Dash had a miniscule trace of desire for time on the floor.  “You know you guys can go out there if you like.” 

Surprised that Fluttershy could see right through them, Applejack swung her head towards the shy pegasus. “Are you sure, Fluttershy? We’re fine right here.”

“I know you guys want to,” Fluttershy pressed on. “Just because I don’t have anypony to dance with doesn’t mean you guys shouldn’t. Besides, somepony should stay back in case Discord pops up and can’t find Pinkie.”

Applejack and Rainbow Dash exchanged a few glances with each other and their coltfriends before taking Fluttershy's offer with some hesitance on leaving her alone.

“Well, alright. Thanks, Fluttershy,” Rainbow Dash said before Soarin took her hoof and lead her to the dancefloor with Applejack and Caramel following behind. 

Seeing all her friends with their special someponies dancing together brought a warm smile to Fluttershy’s muzzle. Even from her viewpoint, she could still see the smiles on each of their faces as they danced along to the soft melody that filled the garden. She was happy for them, she truly was, but it wasn’t until about two minutes of looking on at them that she really noticed one painfully obvious truth… she was alone. Yes, she offered, but it wasn’t that she was physically alone at the table that started to turn her warm smile bittersweet.

Spike had Rarity, Twilight had Flash, Applejack had Caramel, Rainbow Dash had Soarin, even Pinkie had someone for herself, but her… nopony. 

She never normally thought of such things like that, but at a wedding for two of her best friends, surrounded by her other friends and their coltfriends, certain things began to stand out as she watched everypony she cherished dance to the love song playing like it was made just for them, specifically her lack of a stallion to call her own.

She didn't mind, she really didn't, but it stood out to her like a bear drinking from a tea cup. Fluttershy kept her gaze on her friends, again, truly happy for them, but longing to have something they had to some degree, but more than anything, something from a stallion she had wanted since she was a filly.

“You know, I never quite understood how out of all of them, you managed to be the last single pony.” 

Had it not been from over ten years of dealing with the surprise that one voice always brought, Fluttershy’s tiny litlle *Eep! would’ve been much louder. Thankfully, with the surprise of that one playful voice, always came its owner in an always unpredictable manner. 

“Oh, hi, Discord,” Fluttershy greeted in no particular direction, waiting to see how the redeemed spirit of chaos would enter this time. 

“Not there, dear, Fluttershy.”

Fluttershy spun around a few times until her eyes landed on the large willow tree. Where a hole in the trunk should’ve been, a circle of yellow with an inner red circle in the middle stood out amongst the brown of the trunk. The yellow circle blinked, and Fluttershy just gave a smile. “Hi, Discord.” 

Discord’s yellow-irised eye blinked again as his red pupil looked on at Fluttershy. A long piece of bark started to move away from the tree, peeling off like tape, but instead of bark, a slithery brown body peeled away from the tree. The body of Discord then sprouted his mismatched animal limbs and wings, but his head still hadn’t sprouted. 

“Oh dear, now where did I put that darned thing?” the voice of Discord asked nopony as his lion arm scratched the top of his body like it was his head. The slithery brown body turned around towards the yellow eyed tree hole. The red pupil in the middle made movements pointing towards inside the tree before the entire eye rolled like a billiard ball into the hole of the tree. “Oh right, I remember.” 

Discord’s body hovered over to the tree and stuck it’s neck into the hole. A few seconds passed before the serpent-like body pulled with it’s might. After some struggle, the mismatched-horned grey head and neck of Discord, complete with now two eyes and a single fanged smile, popped out of the willow tree with the rest of his neck. “Ahhhh, much better. Oops! Almost forgot something.” Discord raised his chicken-clawed hand and gave them a snap. A striped orange and blue tux appeared on his body in a flash of white. Not exactly a traditional choice of style for a wedding, but then again, most ponies aren’t Discord. 

“You look good, Discord,” Fluttershy said in all honesty. Few beings could pull off a chaotic look, but Discord managed to make chaos work perfectly for him, naturally. 

“Why thank you, Fluttershy. Have to look my best for friends getting married, and for my first friend’s birthday.” An honest smile crossed Discords lips before he raised his claws up again and snapped. This time, a medium-sized, pyramid-shaped box, tied off in pink and yellow ribbon appeared in front of Fluttershy. “For you.” 

Fluttershy took the box, and after a few seconds of finding out how to open the awkwardly shaped box, she saw a gift that made her eyes widen and her voice crack in glee. “Oh my goodness! You got him to wear it! You got him to wear it!” Standing in the box, and struggling to smile, a white rabbit with long, floppy ears, and beady black eyes that could pierce through a pony’s soul opened his stubby arms like he just performed a trick. 

“Oh my gosh! Angel Jr.! You’re actually wearing it!” 

The little rabbit in the box cringed a bit, but kept his false smile as he was reminded of the critter-sized red and green patterned Hearth’s Warming sweater that covered his body, but that wasn’t the only surprise Discord had for Fluttershy. 

Discord eyed Angel Jr. for a few seconds. A message exchanged between the two, and with reluctance, the rabbit hopped out of the awkward box onto Fluttershy’s back. He came up to her head and extended his arms. Next thing Fluttershy knew, she was wrapped in a small embrace from the rabbit.

“Awwwwww, my little Angel does have a soul!” Fluttershy cooed as she nuzzled the small rabbit. If Angel Jr. is anything like his father, and he is, every fiber of his being screamed for him to push the pegasus mare away and demand a complicated salad, but with Discord looming over him with those seemingly crazy red eyes, and the fact that it was a wedding and Fluttershy’s birthday, he opted to take the nuzzle. 

Discord watched on with a smug grin plastered on his face. “I’m guessing you like your gift?”

“So so much! Thanks, Discord!” Fluttershy’s nuzzle on Angel Jr. continued on as she talked to the draconequus. 

“Oh, it was nothing.” Taking a check around the area, Discord hovered in the air, on the lookout for one pony in particular. “Now, Fluttershy, do you happen to know where Pinkie is?” 

“She went to the bathroom a few minutes before you came. How are things with you guys anyway?” 

Discord’s smug smile turned to one of bliss and fondness as his lengthy body curled up a bit in delight. “Oh, just wonderful, Fluttershy. Her laugh, her randomness, her smile, the way we get each other, the way she doesn’t freak out if suddenly and cotton candy cloud engulfed a building! She’s everything a being of chaos could want.” 

Discord’s reminiscences of the party mare the stole his heart had him oozing love and admiration, literally. Hearts started to dance around Discord’s mismatched horns before falling onto the grass like an endless stream. 

“Aww, I’m so happy for you two.”

“Thanks, Fluttershy, and that also brings me back to what I said earlier.” Discord uncurled his body as he floated over to Fluttershy with curious eyes. “How is it that you’re the single one in your group? Anytime I drop by for a visit and we do something in town, I see some stallions give you a few look overs. Obviously there are some stallions interested in you.” 

Words didn't come at first as Fluttershy struggled to find a somewhat right answer. She shuffled around a bit and averted her gaze from Discord's partially taunting eyes. The grin on Discord's lips only widened at Fluttershy's nervous attempt to answer. Finally, she had one.

"I guess I just haven't found the one yet," she answered with a shrug. "I mean, it's not like I haven’t tried."

True as her words were, she hid numerous details and her true annoyance from Discord's curious, but honest eyes.

It was expected that when Fluttershy started dating, her shyness would be the thing that kept her from really connecting with stallions on an intimate, and even casual level. In the beginning it did, but with a desire to have something like her friends had with their special someponies, and some help from said friends, she was able to at least talk to a stallion without retreating into a bush after stumbling on one word… most of the time. Not the full on result, but it was progress. However, even with the slightly more fearless Fluttershy, her luck with love ran out before it began.

It varied around reasons. Either he just wasn't right, he wanted to move too fast, he only wanted one thing, she wasn't right for him, he was gay, or the occasional relapses of nervous retreats into shrubbery.

Fluttershy didn't bother Discord with the details, especially the stallions that wanted only one thing. She always feared Discord would hunt down those ponies out and do something inexplicably horrible to them for thinking of using his first friend like that.

"Ah, the old dry spell?" Discord suggested, pulling a fan out from nowhere and fanning himself with it. "Well you're a cute mare. You'll pull right out of it soon enough. In fact!” Discord piped up, "I think I might know a certain stallion that—"

"Oh, that's alright, really," Fluttershy quickly declined, afraid of yet another potential set up from another of her friends. “I really am alright not having anypony right now… it’s just that…” her eyes fell on the dance floor once again. With the first slow song long and over with, more had played throughout her and Discord’s chat. “Being here at a wedding, and seeing all my friends with ponies of their own… well, you know.” 

Discord’s eyes softened a little, fully understanding his friend’s mixed emotions. “Plus, you haven’t gotten that thing you hoped you could get before tonight. Am I right?” 

Yellow turned red on Fluttershy’s face as her eyes widened and began to sweat just slightly. “I-I-I d-d-don’t know w-w-wh-what you mean,” she stammered, looking around no particular direction. 

“Oh, don’t pretend like you don’t know,” Discord taunted, arching his slithery form so his face was inches away from the pegasus. “That one thing one your list you hoped to get before tonight.” Reaching into his oddly-colored tux, Discord pulled out a bright and aged yellow and pink piece of paper that made Fluttershy’s already wide eyes go wider. 

“H-H-H-How did you know about that? I only told Rainbow Dash about it back in flight school.”

“Oh, a little bunny told me,” Discord answered, casting a sly glance at the bunny that still stood on Fluttershy’s back. Angel Jr. took to cowering when Fluttershy’s intense stare met his beady eyes. “I caught the little guy going through your stuff a while ago, and he pulled out a little list from a glittered box. Sorry, Fluttershy, but once I got it back from him, I couldn’t help but look. I don’t get why you're embarrassed. It’s actually kind of cute.” 

Again, red spread across Fluttershy’s face, and her stare at Angel Jr. lost its intensity. “Because it’s foalish. I made it right after me and Rainbow got our cutie marks.” 

“But you kept it with you since then,” Discord lightly taunted before giving it to Fluttershy. She tucked the old piece of paper into some of her deeper feathers before Discord continued on. “And it really is full of sweet little dreams. You got most of them done… all except that one little thing.”

“I know,” Fluttershy admitted with a small sigh. “It would’ve been nice to have that before tonight, but like I said before, it was just a dream I had when I was a filly.” 

“Maybe, but the night’s not over yet,” Discord threw in in a sing-song tone. 

“Yeah, but tonight’s not for me, it’s for Spike and Rarity.” 

Discord pulled out an empty chair and sunk into it’s cushion right beside Fluttershy. “I guess you’re right.” The two looked onto the still dancing couples, the bride and groom in particular. “It really was nice of you to offer your birthday as the wedding date, but I can’t help but feel like you had another motive up your sleeve,” he proposed, pulling out a playing card with the word “Motive” out of the sleeve of his tux. 

“Weeeell,” Fluttershy began with a smug smile, “the fact that everypony’s paying attention to Spike and Rarity instead of me is a nice add in.”

“There it is!” Discord exclaimed, tossing his playing card in the air as it burst into flames.

“But I did offer today mostly for them, but with the attention off me and on them… it’s a nice bonus. Knowing Pinkie, if today had been for me, she would’ve thrown a huge party for me… and everypony would have their eyes on me!” she finished off with a shudder. 

“Oh, same old Fluttershy,” Discord chuckled as he brought the pegasus to his side in a one armed hug.

Fluttershy happily returned Discord’s embrace. “I’m not completely the same. I can talk to stallions… somewhat.”

“I’ve seen. Just keep working on it.” 

“I will, but first…” Fluttershy spun her head around and her eyes met the rabbit that started to shake upon the fierce eye contact. “... I need to have another talk with a certain rabbit about going through my things again.” She broke the embrace and walked off, Angel Jr. all the while glaring at Discord like he sent him death. The draconequus waved off maliciously at Angel Jr. like he was ready for whatever he could possibly throw at him. 

When they were out of sight, Discord looked at the ground below him and tapped his dragon-clawed foot onto the ground. “He really is your son, Angel.” Once his short round of laughter ceased, Discord look up from the floor and to the starry sky. “I’m just joking with you. And don’t worry, we’ll look after Jr.” 

“Psssst! Cordy! Psssst!”

The poor excuse for a whisper drew Discord’s attention under the table. Once he lifted the cloth, he was met with a familiar pink mane and body that made him smile from ear to ear. “Pinkie, my dear!”

“Hey, Cordy!” 

“Cordy” The cute little nickname Pinkie came up with for Discord always left a pleasant ring in his ears every time he heard it. 

“Looks like Fluttershy isn’t gonna try to get that last thing on her list tonight,” Pinkie stated as she got up from under the table. 

“No, it appears not, but I get the feeling that’s not gonna stop you is it, my dear?” Discord inquired with a raise of his eyebrows. 

“You betcha. Operation: Perfect Surprise is a go, and I’m gonna need your help.” 

Discord snapped his chicken claws once again, and replacing him was a floating lamp that he appeared out of in a shroud of smoke. Out he came, wearing a turban. “You’re wish is my command.” 

“Thanks, Cordy. BUT FIRST!!!” 

A snap of Discord’s claws told Pinkie he knew exactly what she was thinking. The curly, fake black moustache that flashed onto her muzzle confirmed this, and she took to rubbing her hooves together like a mad doctor. 

Discord watched his questionably-sane marefriend rub her hooves together and couldn’t help but smile at her antics. “Ah, this is why I love you, my dear.”


***


Canterlot Castle. The pinnacle of architecture in Canterlot and maybe all of Equestria, and tonight, the place of stay for numerous ponies.

With the wedding in Canterlot, Twilight, Luna, and Celestia had offered every guest a room in the castle for the night, all of which took with great appreciation. With the reception over with and the bride and groom already on their way to their honeymoon, everypony was headed to their rooms. One guest in particular was making her way to one of the finer suites saved just for her, and now, her deep-in-trouble rabbit.

“And if you go around peeking at things that aren’t yours again, just remember what will happen. Understand?” 

Angel Jr. nodded if only just to satisfy Fluttershy and get her off his back. Odds were, he’d be back to doing whatever he pleased the minute they got back home. 

The two arrived in front of a magnificent door that lead inside to their suite and a castle guard that stood to the side. 

“Ah, Ms. Fluttershy. Princess Twilight informed me this is where you’ll be staying for the night.” The unicorn guard’s horn glowed a golden light, and he unlocked the door. “Enjoy your suite,” he said with a bow.

“Thank you,” she returned, brushing past the guard as he started to close the door once she past through. The room was as could be expected of a suite in a castle, absolutely stunning. All the stories Rarity had told her about the castle rooms and their beauty were proved all true at that one instant. Not that she’s never been in a suite before, but she just hadn’t really taken it in, nor had the chance to actually sleep in one. 

As soon as he saw the over-sized bed full of pillows looking like they were ready to explode fluff and feathers, Angel Jr. leaped off of Fluttershy’s back and dived onto the bed, greedily taking as much space as his tiny form could. 

Though she was still upset with him, Fluttershy couldn’t help but smile at the rabbit’s dreamy gaze as he sunk into the bed. Even though he was tuckered out, Fluttershy was still wide awake. The excitement of the night still had trouble subsiding, and her chat with Discord left her thinking about a few things that refused to let her sleep soundly. 

She needed to do something. If she stayed inside the room, her thoughts would leave her staring at the ceiling until the morning. 

“Maybe the girls are still up.” With that glimmer of hope in mind, Fluttershy trotted to the door with the thought of who to see first on her mind. 

She reached for the door and turned the knob. 

“Hey, Fluttershy!” 

On the other side of the door, next to the guard, Pinkie stood with her hoof raised, ready to knock on the door. Behind her, stood the rest of her friends, Rainbow Dash, Applejack, Twilight, and…

“Spike?!? Rarity?!?”

The unicorn and dragon in the back of the group nodded to their shocked friend. 

“B-B-But your train. Your honeymoon! I saw it leave!”

“Our stuff is on the train, darling,” Rarity explained, “Spike is going to fly us to Neighagra Falls later on.” 

“Okay,” Fluttershy nodded slowly, still confused as to why the supposed-to-be honeymooners weren’t far away from here. “But why?” 

“Darling, did you honestly think we’d let your birthday go uncelebrated? If it weren’t for you, none of this would have been possible!” 

Fluttershy quickly tried to push the matter side and say it was nothing, but Rarity cut her off. 

“And don’t try and say it was nothing because it was something.” Rarity’s eyes started to gleam, reflecting the moonlight as she bore a thankful smile. “If it weren’t for you, who knows how long Spike and I would have waited until we could get married. The least we could do is make sure the pony that did this for us doesn’t spend the rest of her birthday alone, especially when most of us are just a few rooms away.”

Once Rarity finished, Fluttershy took the time to look at the rest of her friends and their hopeful and warm eyes. Seeing them all there, just for her, normally would make her feel like she was troubling them, but now, all it did was warm her heart and broaden her smile.

“We also brought cake,” Pinkie added in, sliding closer to Fluttershy and pulling out a large yellow and pink frosted cake from out of nowhere. “It’s your favorite, vanilla,” she poorly whispered. 

“And it’ll be just us, no huge surprise party, just us,” Applejack threw in, earning a surprised expression from Fluttershy. “Discord told us you’re little fear,” the farm mare answered the pegasus’s unspoken question. 

“D-Did he plan this?” Fluttershy couldn’t help but ask after a few seconds of silence.

“Part of it,” Pinkie answered. 

Fluttershy rolled her eyes. “I should thank him later then.”

“Sooooo does that mean we can party with you?” Pinkie asked hopefully, pushing the cake closer to Fluttershy’s face as if it were a bribe. The sidestep and gesture to come in was all Pinkie needed to nearly explode in excitement and dash inside. 

The others followed suit before Fluttershy stepped back into her suite where she came to a little surprise. 

Balloons hung around the large room, streamers adorned the windows, presents from nowhere lined the table in the corner, and sprawled across a floating cotton candy cloud, Discord blew the party horn in his mouth as confetti exploded around the room like bombs. “Happy birthday, Fluttershy!” 


***


Canterlot has been, is, and will be known for its aristocratic atmosphere and high-class style of living. It’s a city unlike most, where snobbishness runs rampant, and anything “unrefined” is looked down upon, and should any activity deemed “unrefined” be practiced, it is met with dry cynicism, a nose in the air, and an attitude that would make one sick. It is the way of Canterlot, and its unspoken code to keep the city “refined”. 

But at a certain party in Canterlot, in Canterlot Castle… all images and thoughts one would think of when they thought of Canterlot would be delightfully shattered. 

True to their word, Spike and the girls had kept the party to just them and Discord, but even at that, and honestly expected, pleasant chaos reigned in Fluttershy’s suite. For the last couple of hours, Spike, Discord, and the girls partied Ponyville style. With a soundproofing spell around the suite, compliments of Twilight, music blared from speakers that Discord poofed up. Everypony had danced to heavy beats. Twilight danced like a sporadic, three-legged camel with a twitch, the cake Pinkie brought had massive bit marks, and Discord’s party decorations danced along with Fluttershy and her guests, literally. A simple snap of his claws and Discord had himself animated party decor. Other than the dancing decorations and the cotton candy clouds that would puke out confetti, it was your regular Ponyville party. 

Now, however, chaos, for the most part, had died down for Fluttershy’s gift opening, and so far, her haul was amazing. Her friends spared no expense for her, and while it made her feel a little guilty, Fluttershy still couldn’t help but gawk at the amazing things she was receiving. Next to be opened, Pinkie’s gift stood big and tall on the table the gang occupied. With tender hooves, Fluttershy unwrapped the large gift, and after the expected mini-bomb of confetti, a large, chrome, futuristic looking machine revealed itself. 

“It’s an ice cream machine!” Pinkie informed, clearing away the confusion the other clearly held. “All you gotta do is put in the ingredients that come with it, aaaaaaand BAM! Delicious… sweet, creamy ice cream pops right out.” Saliva began to droop out of the pink mare’s mouth as her eyes glazed with a dreamy expression. “Creamy, creamy ice cream.”

Taking a few napkins from the table with her wing, Fluttershy dabbed Pinkie’s mouth to keep droll from spilling over, a task she somehow silently received over the years. “Thanks, Pinkie. I’m sure it’ll taste wonderful.” Fluttershy gave another curious glance at the machine, unsure of so many things about the weird looking device. “I’ve never seen an ice cream machine like this before to be honest.”

“That’s because I built it last week. It’s animal friendly!” Without giving her friends a chance to ask, Pinkie scooted closer to Fluttershy’s gift with a carrot now in her hoof. Where and how she got it, it hurt for anyone to really think about it. “I’ll show you. Okay… take something one of your animals like, like a carrot.” 

Pinkie dangled the carrot in the air for emphasis before continuing with her demonstration. The others watched on as Pinkie shoved the carrot in one end of her machine, added a few of the ingredients that she packed into the gift, and fired her invention up.

Pinkie’s gift bounced up and down in a cartoonish fashion as parts shifted and turned, slightly scaring all but Discord as they watched the little contraption have its moment. A few moments of sporadic movement later, the machine settled down to a light buzz before a  holed tray popped out on the other side of the machine. In one of the holes, a single scooped ice cream cone sat in its holder, looking ready to eat.

“Wow, Pinkie. That’s amazing!” Fluttershy exhaled in awe at the picture perfect treat that popped out of her gift. “But what did you mean by ‘Animal Friendly’?”

“Weeeell,” Pinkie chirped, “since some animals can’t have regular ice cream, I packed ingredients that won’t upset their stomachs. That way they can have super delicious ice cream with you whenever!”

“And the carrot?”

“Carrot flavored ice cream for the only rabbit in the room, duh!” Pinkie explained with a hoof pointed at Angel Jr., who now decided to make an appearance at his owner’s gift opening.

“And you’re sure nothing will happen to the animals that eat it?” Fluttershy asked nervously.

“Extra sure,” Pinkie assured. “I dropped by Dash and Soarin’s place, and Tank gave it a shot before I wrapped it.”

Fluttershy’s attention switched to Rainbow Dash, who gave her a simple, “Don’t worry, Fluttershy, it works fine.”

Taking her friends’ words, she grabbed the ice cream cone out of its tray and held it in front of Angel Jr. “Hi, Angel. Do you want to taste Pinkie’s carrot ice cream cone?”

The last thing she expected was for the rabbit to slap the treat right out of her hoof with an irritated look plastered on his face, then point at the door demandingly.

With a speech on rudeness ready for the rabbit, Rarity was about to unleash it until she and the others saw Angel Jr.’s leg thumping on the table, his slight dancing in place, and the strained expression under the irritation. All those signs with the now desperate pointing towards the door, it only meant one thing.

“Oh my goodness! You need to go out, don’t you, Angel?”

More thumping and more exaggerated pointing from the rabbit answered Fluttershy’s question and added to Angel Jr.’s impatience.

“Okay, okay, I’ll take you outside.”

“Oh, darling, it’s your birthday. Let one of us take Angel out for you,” Rarity offered, only to be met with the scared faces on each of her friends.

“Rarity, honey,” Spike began from next to her, “do you really think it’s the best idea for any one of us other than Fluttershy to be alone with Angel Jr.? The son of the Angel Bunny?”

Rarity’s eyes turned to the little rabbit on the table. Angel Jr. eyed her as his usual frown remained on his lips. Those black eyes just stared at her, menacingly, like soulless pools ready for her to drown in. That bunny may as well have been the son of evil with eyes like that, and he was close to it.

“On second thought…” Rarity trailed off, clinging to her husband for comfort.

Fluttershy stood up with a blush on her cheeks and a nervous smile, like she was apologizing for anything her rabbit and his father may have done to them. “I’ll just take him out myself. I’ll be back in a little while, okay.”

Her friends waved her and Angel Jr. off as they broke for the door and headed out of the suite, Angel Jr. trying his hardest not to leak all over the castle stairways as he went.


***


It was cold. Pain and simple. Unlike the wedding reception at the gardens, the outside of Canterlot Castle wasn’t bathed in the warmth of green torches. Instead, Fluttershy and Angel Jr. were left to December’s strong and icy grip. Fluttershy was surprised that whatever Angel Jr. had to do didn’t freeze midway. They were only out for a minute, and both felt like they were about to freeze. It only made them more thankful for the warm and inviting fireplace in one of the castle’s lower living areas. Fluttershy remembered the open area well. When Twilight and Spike moved in more than a decade ago, both had made renovations to certain areas of the castle for any visit from their friends.

“I should thank them later, right, Angel?”

Angel Jr. either didn’t hear, or flat out ignored Fluttershy as he huddled closer to the open fire, warming every hair follicle on his snow-white coat much to the rabbit’s pleasure.

Fluttershy ignored being ignored and settled deeper into the deep red couch she sat herself in by the fire. She could feel the fire’s dancing embers radiate their warmth throughout her fur and feathers. It was bliss. “We’ll go back up in a few more minutes, okay Angel?”

The rabbit just waved a stubby little arm as a sign to leave him be, which Fluttershy obliged. She settled even deeper into the plush couch. It was like a cloud, a cloud with a weird crunching sound to it. Moving around a little more, Fluttershy sourced the sound out as coming from her feathers. She unfurled them to see an old piece of paper drop to the ground, that list.

Written in elementary, pink legibility, “Things To Do Before I Turn 30”. The paper it was written on was stained, old, and a little crumbled, but still remained if not just to serve its purpose; to be entirely checked off, but one unchecked box left the list unfulfilled, and left Fluttershy to recall everything that happened that night and her forgotten troubles that now resurfaced.

All her friends, their special someponies, that’s not what brought her down. It was something they probably already had with their significant other that she didn’t. She wanted to talk about a little more. Discord only scratched the surface when he talked with her, but then came the party. She was thankful to at least not have the topic hovering over her with the chaos that reigned in her room, but with this list now on the couch, all hope of forgetting was abandoned. 

She wouldn’t bring it up again, not tonight, at least she couldn’t now. Her friends went out of their way to just make her happy on her birthday, and she wasn’t about to ruin a party with her own personal problems even though she really wanted to talk to someone about it. She enjoyed the party, she really did, and it got her mind off her list, but one moment to remember was all it took to bring her back to square one.

“Maybe tomorrow on the train ride back,” she whispered aloud as she folded the piece of paper in her hooves.

“Sorry, sir, I just started my shift. I haven’t seen anypony roaming around.”

“Ugh, she’s an orange mare, cowpony hat, might be with five other mares and a dragon. She’s friends with the princess.”

Fluttershy poked her head over the couch to see a royal guard and a familiar red stallion with a light orange mane and tail.

“Well I know where Princess Twilight Sparkle’s chamber is, but I’m not allowed to give that information to—”

“Fluttershy?”

The mention of her name elicited the tiniest squeak from her that would’ve been louder had not the speaker been a familiar face.

“H-H-H-Hi, Big Macintosh.”

Big Macintosh returned his attention to the guard in front of him. “That’s alright, sir. Ah found somepony that might know where she is.”

“Very good, sir.” The guard spun around to continue his patrol as Big Macintosh trotted towards the living area Fluttershy sat herself in. 

“Hi, Fluttershy.” 

Had it not been for the years she’s known the hulking red stallion, Fluttershy would’ve found a way to duck under the cushions of the couch at Big Mac’s presence. “Hi, Big Mac. What’s that on your back?” 

Looking to where Fluttershy was looking, Big Mac slided the large box on his back onto the couch. “It’s your gift actually, from Applejack. Ah coulda swore she took it with her when she went to go see you, but Ah found it in mah room. No idea how it got there.” 

“Oh, well, thank you for bringing it,” Fluttershy said, taking the box and moving it to clear some space. “Do you want to sit down?”

Mac simply nodded and took a seat next to the smaller pegasus. “By the way, happy birthday, Fluttershy.”

“Oh, thank you.” 

“It was really nice of you, what you did for Spike and Rarity.”

Fluttershy found her cheeks tinting a light red as yet another pony brought up her action. “It was nothing, really. I’m just happy to see those two finally together like that. They’ve been waiting since Rarity’s birthday to get married, probably even longer than that.”

Mac chuckled lightly. “Ah bet. Ah still remember when Spike used to follow her around like a puppy. Come to think of it, Ah’m pretty sure Ah’ve seen him float on little hearts before.”

Fluttershy couldn’t help but let out a few small laughs of her own. “You right, he did. But that’s nothing compared to how Rarity feels about him. You should’ve seen Rarity when they started dating. Anytime she came over to Ponyville, or I went over to Canterlot, she couldn’t stop talking about him.” A glimmer started in Fluttershy’s eyes. “And now here we are.” 

Fluttershy didn’t notice that she went staring off right in front of her. All she could think of was Spike and Rarity, and the love they had for one another. The thought of them lead to her other friends and their special someponies. All of them, either just starting out, or in love for quite a while. She kept telling herself she was happy for them, and she was, she really was, but the piece of crumpled up paper sitting beside her didn’t exactly put her in a celebrating mood.

‘They’ve all probably had it.’ she thought to herself, her gaze never changing from the fire still blazing in front of her.

“Fluttershy?”

Big Mac’s voice brought her out of her thousand yard stare and back to Equestria. “Sorry, what?” she asked with a shake of her head. 

“Nothin’, you just, sorta went off somewhere.”

“I did?” Fluttershy fidgeted a bit in her seat as she tried to avoid Mac’s worried eyes.

“Are you alright?” Mac asked with genuine concern.

“Yeah, fine,” she answered a little too quickly to be true, and Big Mac could tell. 

“Fluttershy. Ah’m an Apple. Ah know when ponies ain’t tellin’ the story right.” 

The shuffling Fluttershy found herself doing in her seat only further proved Big Mac’s hunch that something was on the pegasus’s mind. 

“Are you sure you’re alright?” This time, Fluttershy could almost absorb the stallions concern for her. Leave it to an Apple to be this concerned for a friend. 

Fluttershy considered her options. Big Mac was like her in some ways. He wouldn’t push for something if it made somepony uncomfortable, unless it was of dire importance, and a simple “I don’t want to talk about it” would’ve easily stopped Big Mac from asking on. However, the crumbled piece of paper next to her brought back all the initial plans of talking her problem out, and only made her want to confide in somepony about it, somepony that wasn’t on a party high like the rest of her friends upstairs. Somepony who wouldn’t be brought down was right next to her, honestly concerned for her. Finally, after a few moments, she felt it was safe to let Big Mac know her answer. 

“Not entirely,” she sighed out almost inaudibly, letting her bubble-gum pink mane drop over her shoulder and cover an eye. 

The crackling of flames reigned as the only sound in the open room for a few seconds before Big Mac spoke up again. “What do you mean?”

“Well, have you ever told yourself, or at least dreamed of doing something that hasn’t happened yet?” 

Mac’s put a hoof to his chin as he racked his mind for an answer. “Ah guess Ah still haven't seen Equestria’s largest cider mug yet. Told mahself to go see it before Applebuck season… two years ago.” 

Fluttershy gave him a curious look. “To go see a cider mug?” 

Mac simply shrugged. “Ah’m a simple stallion. Ah don’t need big ol’ extravagant dreams or that sort to make me happy.” 

Fluttershy’s muzzle grew into a tender smile. “I know what you mean.”

“So,” Mac continued, “what is it that you told yourself you were gonna do?”

Once again, Fluttershy felt her list’s presence, and it only prompted her to get this thing off her chest quickly. Reaching her forelimb to the old piece of paper, she brought it to her face and gave it another lookover. “It’s a little silly, but back then, I really thought I could have this.”

“What?” Mac pressed on. 

“Well…” Fluttershy couldn’t bring herself to say it out loud. Was her mini-dream really as silly as she thought? Failing with her nerves, she resigned to hoofing her list to Big Mac. He took it and saw what was written, as well as the check marks next to most lines of writing. 

“Make a best friend

Help a lot of animals

Fly better”

“Meet Sapphire Shores?” Big Mac read off with a small chuckle. “What happened to nothing too extravagant?” 

“I wrote that back when Rainbow Dash and I were still in flight school after we got our cutie marks, and she was my favorite singer back then. I couldn’t help myself,” she answered, blushing brighter than Mac’s coat. 

“S’okay, Ah liked her a lot too. Truth be told, Applejack caught me dancin’ along to a few of her songs alone in mah room when we were little… more than once.”

Fluttershy just couldn’t hold it in. The thought of somepony like Big Mac, even as a colt, dancing along to Sapphire Shores was too much for her to not laugh out. She was just thankful even Big Mac found it just as hilarious. 

“Funny thing is, I still managed to meet her. Rarity designed for her a lot, and I got to meet her more than once.”

“And Ah see you got to cross that off your list,” Mac added with a smile that faltered slightly when the mention of the list made Fluttershy’s smile drop a little. 

“Yeah, and I almost got to cross everything off.”

Mac took that as a signal that he hadn’t finished reading through. When he looked back at the little list, he resumed reading through the pegasus’s hopes and dreams. All off them after the Sapphire Shores dream were pretty simple dreams and goals; ones that could easily be accomplished through life. But one at the bottom, one hope, dream, or goal, whatever it could be called, remained unchecked, and it brought out a shocked expression he wished didn’t make itself obvious. 

Fluttershy saw Big Mac’s stunned expression and couldn’t make out if that was a good or bad thing. “I know, it’s a silly thing to get upset about, but…” She shrugged her shoulders. “... I really thought it would’ve happened by now.” Her mane dropped further over her eye, like she wanted to hide from everything around her for bringing up something that she really thought was silly. 

A rough unfurred hoof touched her shoulder with a surprising softness and brought her to the smiling face of Big Mac. “Fluttershy, it ain’t silly, what you want. It’s really sweet. Only reason Ah’m surprised is because Ah honestly thought you would’ve gotten it a long time ago.” 

Now that got her attention. “You don’t think it’s—”

“Eenope, not at all. It’s actually really sweet.”

“And you thought I already—”

“Eeyup.”

Red flushed again on Fluttershy’s cheeks. “Why?”

Now it was Big Mac’s turn to blush. He thanked Celestia and Luna that his coat hid his blush well, but it didn’t stop his eyes from darting. “Well, it’s just that…” He reached a forelimb over his head and began to rub. “... you’re a nice, caring, pretty mare. Plus Ah’ve heard Applejack talk about a few of the stallions you dated. It’s just, ugh, surprising to me Ah guess.” 

If Fluttershy could blush brighter, one would think she was an oven about to blow. A stallion was giving her all these compliments, and she’d be lying is she said she didn’t find the slightest pleasure in it. “Well, thank you for thinking that of me, but even at that, I’m still one goal shy on that list.”

“Maybe you’re just lookin’ in all the wrong places.” 

“Maybe,” Fluttershy sighed at the possible answer. “Is it weird that I haven’t been able to connect with somepony like that to feel that way by now?”

“Ah don’t think so. Different things come to ponies at different times. Can’t really control how you feel about somepony. Besides, best to know you don’t feel that way and have it end rather than try and force it.”

Mac’s words held a truth that Fluttershy couldn’t believe could come from the large farmer.

“Ah’ve lived in a house with three other mares most of mah life. These kinda things pop up at the dinner table,” Mac explained the question that didn’t come after seeing the surprised pegasus. 

“Oh, right. Sorry, and I guess you’re right about not forcing it.” 

“Just sayin’ what Ah’ve been told before.”

“Well, it really helped. Thanks, Big Mac.” 

Big Mac found his face rising with heat as he felt a set of yellow forelimbs wrap themselves around his body in a small embrace. “A-A-Any time,” Mac stuttered out, hesitating to return the hug, but missed his chance once Fluttershy broke away after a few seconds. “So, ugh, feelin’ better?” 

“Yeah, a lot actually. This was kind of bothering me throughout the night, and I guess I just needed someone to talk to about it with.”

“Did you try talkin’ with Spike or one of the girls?”

“I was going to, but they surprised me with a party back up in my suite.”

“You didn’t pepper spray them again, did you?”

“No, they haven’t tried to surprise me like that since that night,” Fluttershy quickly answered with a small wince at the memory. “They were just outside my door and wanted to celebrate with me, so Discord poofed up a party. I just came down here because Angel Jr. needed to go outside. Besides, I really didn’t want to bring it up since they set a party up for me.”

Mac nodded understandingly. “Well, glad Ah could help.” The night he originally thought he would have had involved just going to a wedding and calling it a night. He didn’t expect to be cheering a friend up tonight, and after he thought he did, he expected to see a wide smile on Fluttershy’s face. He only saw half of what he wanted to see. 

Fluttershy was smiling, but there was something about her eyes that spoke out that she wasn’t entirely fine. She only wished she could have hidden it better to not feel like she was bothering Big Mac when he began to speak again. 

“You still wish you coulda had it, don’t you?” 

She didn’t fight the nod that came. “Yeah. I really, really thought I could’ve gotten it by now. When you set a hope like that and never do it, it can be a little upsetting.” Her teal eyes met Big Mac’s green ones, and she did her best to make her small smile seem larger. “But hey, I can try and make that a ‘Things To Do Before I Turn 31’ goal.” 

Big Mac couldn’t decide on whether to go along with her obvious attempt at self-comfort, or try and do something more. She said she was feeling better, and Big Mac could tell that was the honest truth, but seeing that struggled smile, slumped position, and her mane threatening to try and cover her face up even more, Mac felt like he witnessed a puppy get kicked. How could somepony like Fluttershy not have gotten what she always wanted since she was little? She deserved it, and Big Mac truly believed that. He couldn’t help but feel like he should try something. Somewhere in a span of a few seconds, an idea hit Big Mac, a crazy idea, and he didn’t know how Fluttershy would take it, nor if she would even want it.

“Fluttershy?” 

The pegasus looked back into Mac’s vivid green eyes and his hard-to-make-out expression stretched across his face. 

“Ah don’t know if it’ll help, but Ah got you a gift too.” 

“Big Mac, you know you didn’t need to get me anything,” Fluttershy said as a little more of her mane dropped over one of her eyes. 

“Ah still wanna give it to you, but first Ah need you to close your eyes.”

With a little hesitence, Fluttershy closed her eyes just enough to block everything out, but not strain her eyelids. It wasn’t that she didn’t trust Big Mac, but her and surprises just didn’t mix too well, and Mac hoped that this would be something that wouldn’t scare the mare off. 

“Got ‘em closed?” 

She nodded, and then she waited. 

The next thing Fluttershy felt were rough, yet gentle on her, unfurred hooves hold her forelimbs lightly. Mac took a breath, closed his eyes, and closed the distance between the two in what probably was the biggest surprise Fluttershy ever experienced. Mac’s lips met Fluttershy’s own in a tender kiss that mixed her soft lips with his more rugged ones. Why her eyes didn’t shoot open and why she didn’t back away the instant his lips touched hers, Fluttershy knew the answer perfectly. It felt wonderful. 

Right when she felt Mac ready to pull away, she quickly wrapped one forelimb around the back of his head to keep him where he was and she started to kiss back. Both Big Mac and Fluttershy weren’t strangers to getting kissed. Old flames and dates gave them experience, but this, this bold surprise was something neither of the two ever felt before. That old cliche of sparks flying and feeling like they were the only two ponies in Equestria, Fluttershy shamelessly let those feeling flood over her as she savored the moment. 

After a few more seconds, Big Mac pulled away and Fluttershy let her hoof drop. Their now open eyes met, and blissful smiles crossed their faces. Again, Mac thanked the goddesses for his coat color. Fluttershy on the other hoof was blushing like mad, but her smile never faltered. 

“Wow.” 

The barely audible whisper was heard loud and clear by the red stallion next to her, and though he found himself unable to voice it out, his eyes were all it took for Fluttershy to know he felt the same. 

“Do… Do you, ugh…” So much for not flopping afterwards. “You think you can cross that last thing off your list?” 

Fluttershy’s cheeks glowed ever more, nearly matching Mac’s coat. “Oh yeah.” 

In the room hung a painting, like most rooms in Canterlot Castle. It was a good distance away from the two ponies on the couch, and its patterns were a swirl of magnificent colors and its images were painted like fragments, but on a closer look, one could make out bright pink in the painting, and a long slithery form of another in the painting with mismatched horns at the top of its head. Had Fluttershy and Big Mac been paying any attention to the painting, they would’ve seen the two forms in the painting actually move their forelimbs and collide them in a bump.

Mac was still reeling in from what he did. He had no idea where that idea came from, and why he of all stallions decided to do it, but a big part of him was ecstatic he did, and he didn’t want it to end there. “Ugh, Fluttershy? Ah was wonderin’, if you’re not too busy, would you like to go out sometime?”

“A lady never flips out.” Rarity’s voice reminded Fluttershy in her head, keeping the pegasus from breaking her composure, limited as it was at that moment. 

“I’d love to.” Fluttershy answered with a wide grin, grateful she remained calm, exteriorly. 

“How ‘bout next Friday?” 

Fluttershy just nodded, scared that if she spoke, she’d break her struggling composure. 

“Great! 8:00 good? I can come pick you up at your cottage.”

Fluttershy just nodded again and beamed even brighter as her blush started to lessen its intensity. Mac wished he could continue on, he really did, but something kept catching his tongue as he tried to speak. His own actions surprised himself, and now he had a date with Fluttershy. All that left him in a joined silence with the mare next to him. They stayed that way awkwardly for a minute or so until, surprisingly, Fluttershy was the one to break the silence when her mind reminded her of her friends waiting for her upstairs.

“Oh, would you like to come upstairs? Everypony’s probably still waiting for me and Angel Jr.”

“Sure,” Mac answered a little more eagerly than he liked. Fluttershy brushed it off and shot him another smile before getting off the couch and calling to her rabbit. Mac hopped off the couch and settled the gift he came with on his back.

Angel Jr. hopped towards Fluttershy and held out ash-covered paw. 

“Angel, how did you get your paw all dirty?” Fluttershy asked the rabbit. He answered by taking one of her hooves and wiping all the ash on her hoof. “Angel!” she gasped at the rabbit, ready to give him either a stare or another severe talk, but when she locked eyes with the rabbit again, he held out the list. Throughout the night, that list had been hanging over her, and now, with one empty checkmark, and the perfect material to make a mark, Fluttershy gladly took the list with one of her wings. In two strokes, she finally marked off the last thing she had always wanted before tonight. 

“Have a perfect kiss.”

The ashy check mark became the last thing the list felt before it was chucked into the the open fireplace. A list lived to be checked, and this one finally completed its long journey. It went up in flames, complete. 

With a new stride in her step, Fluttershy took her place next to Big Mac. “C’mon, the others are probably waiting for me, and we still have a lot of cake.”

“Sounds great,” Mac replied. With Angel Jr. now atop Fluttershy’s back, the trio proceeded to make their way out of the living area and towards Fluttershy’s suite. Had they been a little faster exiting, they would’ve seen and heard the shuffling of hooves and claws followed by the flash and pop of lavender magic. 

Back in the living area, the strange painting of the slithery creature in the painting smiled over to the swirls of pink next to it. “Whoo! That was a close one wasn’t it, Pinkie, my dear.” 

The swirls of pink moved around to reveal the familiar shape of Ponyville’s party mare. “You’re telling me. Thanks for helping me out, Cordy.” 

“Oh, all I did was poof Applejack’s present from the table to the Apple’s room. It was nothing.”

“But it did get Big Mac down here,” Pinkie chirped merrily. 

“That’s something I’ve wanted to ask you. How did you know Big Mac would do that?”

“Simple. I got an ear flop, stomach growl, pinch in my back legs, and the urge to scream. That means one of my friends is gonna get kissed by an Apple. Plus, I’ve seen how Big Mac looks at Fluttershy over the last couple of years.” 

Pinkie’s wide definition for a plan was just so full of Pinkiness that Discord couldn’t help but shudder with delight. “Oh, Pinkie, my dear, this is why I love you so.”

“Love you too, Cordy. Operation: Perfect Surprise… complete!” Pinkie turned her eyes to Discord’s mad red ones with a sultry smile on her face. “Speaking of which, why don’t you give my lips something perfect and sweet real quick,” Pinkie cooed, puckering her lips ever so slightly. 

Discord craned his neck down to his marefriend with an equally teasing smile. “Glady.”


***



Present Day



***


All eyes were on Fluttershy, and even though she wished they weren’t, her smile betrayed her worry when the story of her and her husband’s first kiss finished. 

“And four or so years after that, me and Apple Bloom got ourselves another sister,” Applejack said as she came up to Fluttershy and gave her a one-limbed hug. 

“Oh my, you guys have had some interesting birthdays in the past, haven’t you?” Pearl commented, earning the attention of all the party guests. 

“You should’ve seen… wait, were you two at Twilight’s birthday party when she turned thirty?” Rainbow asked with a hoof pointed at Pearl and Magnum. 

“I don’t think so,” Magnum answered unsurely. 

“You guys weren’t,” Sweetie Belle assured. “That was when you and mom took that three month-long trip to see the seven wonders of Equestria.”

“Oh yeah!” It all came back to Magnum. “That was the largest cider mug I’ve ever seen.” 

Pearl rolled her eyes before turning back to her youngest child. “So what did happen then?”

“Oh nothing much, really,” Twilight quickly answered before putting on an awkward smile. 

“Oh, c’mon, Twilight. You know a lot happened that day,” Scootaloo teased with a smirk and Apple Bloom next to her, who was trying her best not to laugh at the memory of that particular day. 

“No. Nothing. Nothing at all.”

“C’mon, Twilight. It wasn’t that bad,” Pinkie tried, but Twilight could see the quivering in her lips. 

“Seriously, darling, not all went horrible,” Rarity tried, failing to turn Twilight’s frown upside-down. 

“Don’t know what you’re talking about.” There was no getting Twilight to spill, that much was obvious to her friends, and it only made it all the sweeter for everypony except Twilight that Spike took it upon himself to lay the story out. 

“Okay, it was in Canterlot at the palace…”

“Spike!” Twilight gasped. 

“I’m tellin’ it, Twi.”

“No you’re not.”

“C’mon, it’s hilarious.”

“Don’t.”

“Anyway, it was at the palace…”

“Spike!”

“... me and the girls were getting everything ready…”

“Spike! You’re princess commands you to stop telling this story!”

For just a few seconds, Spike locked eyes with his sister and didn’t say a word, but he knew Twilight better than anypony. Her threat was empty. Her story was getting out today, and it was her turn to go.

“Anyway, it was at the palace…”

“UGH!”
	
	
> Just Tea
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------


Just Tea


Purple and pink.

Purple and pink everywhere.

Ribbons, balloons, loose streamers, even intricately painted carriages displayed the two colors, all to celebrate a beloved princess. Canterlot buzzed with unreal energy. At the center of all the buzz stood the castle. Outside the golden gates, ponies close to the princess and her friends began to flood into the castle grounds, ready to surprise and celebrate their sovereign and friend’s birthday.

Inside the gates, and inside the castle, another story was taking place. Murderous stress and strain replaced the buzz and overjoyous excitement felt outside in the busybody ponies that scurried around rooms as they prepared the castle. Servants cleaned, cooks pulled carts of various foods to the party hall, and the decorators strung up various decor on the walls and ceilings from streamers to crystal chandeliers. At the center of the grand party hall, stood the one dragon organizing the chaos that ran through the castle. 

With a scroll in one claw, and a quill in the other, Spike observed all that went on in the party, marking all that got done while keeping a mental check on what still needed work.

“Okay,” he mused aloud, “Cadance is out with Twi, Shining should be getting here with mom and dad soon, castle’s clean, the last sculpture should be on it’s way, Rainbow Dash and Fluttershy are watching Heartfelt and Sky Dive, and Pinkie’s—”

*BOOM! 

“Whooooooo Hooooooo!”

“... finishing up decorations,” Spike breathed with a claw clutching at his chest.

Pinkie hopped around the party hall with her prized invention in her hooves, her party canon. The pale-blue canon launched party decor of all sorts, fully decorating the windows, tables, and columns in the hall with a loud and festive colors. “How’s it look, Spike?” 

“Little more on the columns, Pink,” Spike answered before turning back to his list. After checking off a few more things, Spike heard another blast of Pinkie’s canon. He spun around to see Pinkie thirty feet in the air, hanging onto a column with her hind legs. 

The party canon stood at its “launch site”, smoking from the launch. Spike also saw another canon in Pinkie’s hooves, and that only worried him even more as he thought of all the possible outcomes that came with mixing Pinkie and anything that blasts. 

Pinkie dug into the barrel of her canon and pulled out some thick string. A few knots and wraps around the column she hung from later, she tucked her canon in her forelimbs with the barrel aimed behind her. 

Spike panicked and broke for the column after realizing the idea that brewed in Pinkie’s mind. “Pinkie! Don’t!”

*BOOM! 

Spike watched his friend soar through the air like Rainbow Dash, but replacing the multi-colored trail, the two lines of string followed the pink mare that held her canon as she flew across the hall. 

In a blur of pink, Pinkie rounded the column several times on the other side of the hall like a speeding carousel. When her orbit ended, she clung to the tall structure with her back legs as held the canon in her front legs. The strings that followed her were knotted off and followed by a loud flopping sound that echoed through the hall. “How’s it look now, Spike?”

Tied to the two columns, a large purple banner unraveled to reveal, in brighter purple and pink letters, “Happy Birthday, Twilight!” 

“Looks great, Pinkie.”

“Thanks, Spike. Now catch me.”

Before getting a chance to ask, Spike went on instinct as Pinkie unwrapped her legs that held her to the column and plummeted down to be caught in Spike’s arms. No surprise or panic showed on Spike’s features. Pinkie had done something similar way too many times to count. 

“1.46 seconds,” Pinkie announced, somehow managing to keep accurate time. “Sorry, Spike. Rainbow Dash still has .02 seconds on you.”

Spike grumbled under his breath. “Dammit. Thought I finally beat her.” He set Pinkie down on the floor with her party canon still in her hooves.

“Gotta be quicker, Spikey,” Pinkie practically sung as she pushed the canon aside. “So, are we done here?”

With his scroll and quill back in his claws, Spike scanned the party hall with a critical eye, finding everything absolutely perfect. Save for the food Applejack and some of the other cooks were still rolling into the hall, everything was set and ready for Twilight’s big surprise. “Twilight’s gonna love it.” 

“How did you get her out of the castle anyway?” Pinkie asked.

“Me and Rarity took her out for breakfast before passing her along to Shining Armor. Right now, my mom and dad’s turn with Twilight should be just about done, and Cadance should have her until we’re ready.”

“Ahhh, a little family field day, huh?” 

“Uh-Huh. I told Cadance to tell Twilight to go back to the castle and meet Celestia and Luna after their little outing.”

“And then we’ll pop up and give her the best surprise party EVER!!!” Pinkie finished off, confetti somehow popping from behind her in a way Spike had long since given up on trying to figure out. “AHH! I can’t wait! You really think she’ll love it.”

“If she calmed down from earlier, yeah.”

Pinkie cocked her head as an eyebrow rose. “Why does she need to calm down?” 

Spike sighed loudly as he pinched the bridge of his snout. “I don’t know, Pink. She freaks out over a lot of things.”

“You think its because she doesn’t know what we’re doing over here,” Pinkie suggested, gesturing around the party hall.

It made sense. If Twilight didn’t know what was going on, or was kept out of the loop for so long, it wasn’t long till her habit of creating the worst case scenario kicked in, and Spike knew this all too painfully well. “Could be. I hope not. I mean, she may be a basket case, but she’s not that big of a basket case.” 


***


Twilight was that big of a basket case, and she was proving that outside a local cafe as she tried her best with the breathing techniques the pony next to her had taught her years ago. 

Cadance was trying her best to ease Twilight’s nerves that seemed to come out of nowhere, but her efforts showed very little progress. “Twilight, you need to calm down, you’ll blow your disguise!” 

Twilight looked down at her shuffling hooves. They weren’t the lavender hue everypony knew her to have. Instead, a dark blue covered her hooves and body while her mane took on dark purple and green colors in a manestyle reminiscent to that of Applejack’s. Upon a closer look, she noticed the dark blue at the bottom of her hooves started to revert back to their natural lavender, and the wings hidden underneath a knitted white sweater twitched sporadically, threatening to break through the material. 

Twilight tried again. Bringing a forelimb to her chest, she took in another breath and exhaled as she extended her forelimb out. Her breaths came out fast and rapid at first until easing into a calm and collected rhythm. 

Cadance came closer to Twilight with a little caution, like anything she said could set the disguised mare off again. “Better?” 

One final shaky breath later, she was. “Yeah, thanks, Cadance.”

Cadance came to Canterlot that day hoping to spend a fun-filled afternoon with her sister-in-law and fellow princess. She even took up a disguise herself to avoid the commotion she and Twilight would probably cause if they walked on the streets of Canterlot. Replacing the tender pink color on Cadance’s coat was a bright yellow hue. Her tri-colored mane now bore light-orange flare, and was styled straight down while a simple red sweater concealed her wings. All that work and high hopes, all for just trying to keep a naturally panicky mare from blowing her top off. It was no wonder Shining Armor seemed a little too eager to hoof her off when Cadance’s turn came around.

“Twilight, seriously, what’s wrong with you? You’re more wound up than I’ve ever seen you, and that’s saying something.”

Twilight gave a defeated sigh and hung her head, trying her best to avoid Cadance’s concerned eyes. 

“Twilight, calm down. Relax. It’s your birthday.”

“It’s because it’s my birthday that I’m like this!” Twilight all but hollered, startling the Princess of Love with her near volcanic outburst.

“Why is that a bad thing? Because if it’s about turning thirty, let me just tell you right now, it’s not that—”

“No, it’s not like that. Me and the others already had that chat with Rarity. It’s about, well…” Twilight looked around the area as if the ponies in the street were listening in. Feeling it was safe, Twilight drew closer to Cadance, and with a little embarrassment in her voice, continued on. “... remember a few weeks ago when Flash took me on that date to the Crystal Empire?”

How could she forget? Cadance’s eyes shimmered upon remembering when Flash contacted her ahead of time to let her know of the date he wanted to have with Twilight in the empire and all the romance details he hopped she could help him with. Cadance of course helped out to the best of her very capable abilities in the field of love. “Yeah, I remember. You guys went to dinner, he took you to a carnival, and then he took you to the grand library. You guys looked so happy until—” The rest of that night sunk straight in, turning Cadance’s reminiscent smile awkward as she tried to dart her eyes anywhere else. 

Flash was ready to try again that night, hoping that the sixth time, on his part at least, would be the charm, but before he even had the chance to pull out that little black box, fate decided to be an unrelenting mistress. This time, it was in the form of chipping crystal, followed by the entire collapse of the History wing of the grand library, burying Twilight and Flash underneath a mountain of books and broken crystal.

Cadance tried to find a way of saying it wasn’t that bad, but she wasn’t delusional. “You’re still upset about that?” 

“No. Well, kinda, but that’s not what I’m worried about.” 

“Then what are you worried about?” 

“He’s going to try again today. I just know it, and something will go wrong. Again!” 

“I will admit, your track record isn’t the best. It’s like the universe or something else doesn’t want you two together, but that doesn’t mean that today can’t be different. Wait, what makes you so sure he’ll try again today?” 

“Because it’s what he does,” she said, flinging one of her forelimbs in the air. “That night at the empire, you know why he chose that specific day?”

Cadance shook her head as she awaited an answer. 

“Because that was our anniversary. And the time when that anvil and piano fell on us? My birthday last year. That time at the lake when we got turned over? Hearts and Hooves Day! And that other time when I swallowed the ring before he even asked? Hearths Warming! Every single time he’s tried, it was always on some special day. Well what better day to try again than his marefriend’s birthday?!?” 

Twilight didn’t notice the tips of her hooves had started to revert back to their natural lavender. 

Cadance meanwhile was still trying to find a way to answer without triggering another possible outburst from her sister-in-law. “So he might try again. That doesn’t mean it’ll turn out like every other time,” she suggested, albeit, with struggle believing those words of hers. 

“You don’t know that. What if he tries and something horrible happens.” She drew in a quick breath as possibilities rolled into her head. “What if he tries and something falls on us again? Or he puts on something really romantic and I ruin it?” 

The lavender that started forming on her hooves traveled upwards, stealing Cadance’s attention and setting her on high alert. “Twilight,” she said in a hushed tone, trying to grab her attention. 

“I’m gonna ruin something. Or something totally random will ruin it!” All over her body, Twilight’s lavender began to take over, washing the blue out like an easy stain. Her mane and tail began to revert to their normal colors as well as the wings underneath her sweater began to twitch. 

“Twilight,” Cadance addressed again, getting no response from the now panicky mare. 

“Or what if he takes me out again, and I swallow the ring because I didn’t look in my drink? I don’t want the ring to come out of me again!” Her wings began to twitch more violently underneath the sweater as more and more lavender covered blue.

“Twilight.”

“Or what if something goes wrong and Flash says he’s finally had it and doesn’t want to ever see me again?!? I’ll lose the only stallion I’ve ever loved and never be able to get over him!”

“Twilight.”

“I’ll always be thinking about losing him, then I won’t be able to focus on being a princess! I’ll become a shut in again, lose my friends and subjects, and I’ll be the biggest disgrace in Equestrian history! And then I’ll—” 

“Twilight!” 

What sounded like a rip in space and time itself, Twilight looked behind her to see that her sweater had two gaping holes at both sides. Her frantically flapping wings had penetrated their compressor and moved along with Twilight’s frantic thoughts. She noticed that her mane and tail were back to their original colors. She blew her cover. The last thing she saw was Cadance slamming a hoof to her forehead before noticing the numerous sets of eyes that were suddenly on her. 

“It’s Princess Twilight!” one pony shouted out. The last thing Twilight saw was a swarm of her subjects starting to crowd around, wishing her happy birthday before a spark and pop of light blue magic encircled her and Cadance. A flash of light later, they were gone. 


***


Most stray alleycats in any city expect ponies to trot by. They even saw the occasional horse shoe or boot flung their way to get them to stop their late night purring. Heck, they even came to expect the few mice unsuspecting enough to travel down the predator-filled stretch. The last thing any of them expected was the loud pop of magic and the blinding white light that followed. It was no surprise that every one of those stray cats were sent in a state of panic, screeching loudly and scrambling around to the nearest path of escape. 

From the pop of magic and blinding light, Cadance, still in her disguise, and Twilight emerged. The younger alicorn looked around to get  grip on her location. Once she settled down, she turned back to Cadance, making a nervous smile upon meeting her eyes.

Cadance just gave her sister-in-law a blank stare. 

“I know, I blew it!” Twilight exclaimed, throwing her forelimbs in the air.

Before another freakout could break out, Cadance placed a hoof gingerly on Twilight’s shoulder and looked at her with concerned eyes. “Twilight,” she said calmly, “I just need you to calm down.” She took a breath. “In.” Then she exhaled. “And out.” Another breath in. “In.” Another breath out. “And out.”

Once she cleared her mind, Twilight followed Cadance’s lead. The technique was old, but it usually did the trick… usually. For a few moments, Twilight kept a slow and steady pace with her breaths, drawing in and breathing out like she was meditating. Everything was calm and collected for those few precious moments. Then came the more hurried breaths. 

Swallowing the ring, pianos falling on her head, alligators in the lake, another shelf collapse, giving Flash food poisoning, these and other memories of failed attempts on both their parts resurfaced in Twilight’s mind, and it did little to aid what should have been a calming effort. More rampant thoughts, each worse than the last, rushed through her mind until she found herself hyperventilating.  

“WRONG! WRONG! WRONG! SOMETHING’S GONNA GO WRONG!” Her inner voice was not helping as Twilight continued to breath at an alarming rate. It wasn’t until Cadance put a hoof on her side that Twilight began to calm down… some what. 

It took a while, but Twilight returned to a normal breathing rate as Cadance stood right beside her. 

“Okay,” Cadance said, “obviously we need to try something else to get you to calm down.” 

“What did you have in mind?”

A smile creeped onto Cadance’s face. “I’ve got an idea, but first, put on your disguise.”

Twilight looked around her side to see the large holes in her sweater and the purple fur and feathers underneath. “Right,” she sighed. She focused on her magic, and in a split second, blue covered purple once again as the sweater mended itself. “So where are we going?"

Cadance turned on her hooves and started out of the alley. “Just a little place I know.” 


***


With a quill and list in his claws, Spike paced the party hall with a critical eye as he marked off various tasks on the list. “Food’s out, hall’s decorated, guests should be coming soon, Twilight’s with Cadance, let’s see, let’s see, let’s see.” He was grateful nopony else was around to see him talking to himself. Everything seemed ready. All that was missing were the guests. With one more quick scan of the hall, Spike made his way for the door and out to another hallway. After a few twists and turns, he was at the entrance of the castle where three familiar ponies caught his eye. Shining Armor, Night Light, and Twilight Velvet were standing by a staircase. When they noticed the dragon, their grins grew wider.  

“Spike!” Twilight Velvet was the first to charge for the dragon and wrap her forelimbs around him. 

“Hey, Mom,” Spike greeted with a hug of his own. “Glad you and dad could make it.”

“Like we’d miss our daughter turning thirty,” Night Light said, trotting up with Shining to the two. “Plus it gives us more of an excuse to see all of you.” 

“Speaking of which, where’s Heartfelt and Sky Dive? I haven’t seen my little grandbabies since your wedding.” Velvet’s eyes traveled with an eerie slowness to Shining. “Why is that, Shining?” 

Shining’s ears flicked down as he struggled to find a valid answer. Lucky for him, Spike came to his rescue. “Rarity’s watching over them in our room. Wanna go surprise them?”

“Do you really need to ask me?” Unraveling her limbs, Velvet wasted no time in starting up the staircase with Night Light following closely behind. 

Spike was about to head up until Shining tapped him on the back. “Spike, Flash and some of the other guys were outside trying to get this really big package inside. Think you can go help them out?”

In his head, Spike ran over everything the party had called for and what was already done. Nothing called for a package. “Yeah, sure.” 

Once he stepped outside, Spike was greeted with the sight of an enormous brown box far too big to be a possible gift. Big Mac, Soarin, Caramel, and Flash Sentry were on each side of the box struggling to move the package up the steps. Their forelimbs were wobbling as they grunted in exertion. 

“Flash,” Caramel called from his station in the back, “your whole ‘Lift and Slide’ plan isn’t really working you know!” 

“I think I can see that,” Flash said through a few grunts as his front legs started shaking from the weight of the box. “Okay, down! Down! Down!” The lofty box came down hard on the stairs, teetering on the incline of the steps and leaving Caramel struggling to keep it from sliding down. 

“What the hay is this?” 

The group of stallions all turned their sights on Spike as he came up towards the box. 

“No idea, Spike,” Flash said as the others waved to the dragon. “Me and Soarin’ were helping out inside when Mac and Caramel got here and told us this thing showed up at the front of the castle.” His hoof was pointed at the teetering box, completely unaware of Caramel still holding up the package from slipping down the steps until he started yelling out in a strained voice. 

“Guys! Little help here!” One of the poor tan stallion’s legs finally gave in and slipped down a step, throwing off Caramel’s balance completely as he braced himself for what would probably be a painful fall followed by getting squished like a pancake. Before any of this could happen, three more sets of hooves and a new set of claws quickly grasped the box. With the added dragon strength, there was hardly any trouble keeping it steady. Actually, with the added dragon strength, there was no problem lifting the thing at all. 

“You okay there, Caramel?” Spike asked once the stallion gained his wits back. 

“Yeah,” he said before grasping his side of the box once again. The quintet easily lugged the mystery package. It landed hard on the ground once the group was inside. All eyes focused on it, questioning what in Equestria could be in there. 

Spike eyed the large box and gave it a few taps, getting a somewhat hollow sound out of it. “Did any of you guys order a late gift for Twilight or something?” Their shaking heads told him no, only adding to Spike’s curiosity. He tapped it again, this time getting something more than just a little echo out of it. From the top of the box, something thick, white and twisted together dropped down from the top. It almost looked like a wick. Spike lifted a claw to the mysterious wick, but out of nowhere, it lit up, sending out tiny sparks of all kinds of crazy colors.

Panic set on everyones faces’ as they watched the spark travel up the coiled mass rather quickly. 

“Hit the deck!” 

No one knew who said it, but before they knew it, Spike’s leathery wings were shielding the group of ponies as they braced for impact. A few agonizing seconds later, the crackling of the spark stopped. It stayed silent save for some shaky breathing and at least one set of shaking legs. Nothing was happening. Spike’s wings retracted a little as he turned to face the mystery box, regretting it as soon as he did. His eyes widened to sizes thought to be anatomically impossible when he saw that the previously rectangular box was now bloated up like a balloon, like it was one more pump of air from—

*KABOOM!

—exploding. 

Everyones’ eyes blinked open when they realized they weren’t dead and found themselves covered in… frosting? Even though there were questions on that, it was nothing compared to the questions they had about what was sitting in front of them. Just a few feet across from the group, a cake of seemingly never ending layers sprouted out of nowhere, and at the top layer, a small rumbling could be heard. 

The answer to all their question came in the form of a beaming draconequus popping out of the cake in a display of confetti and poppers… wearing a curly blonde wig and a white sundress. And for some reason there was a small black mole on the side of his face. 

“Happy birthday, Mrs. Princess.” Discord sung in a low voice as he tried to sway his hips, only getting borderline traumatized expressions out of the ponies and dragon standing below the cake; exactly what he wanted to see. “What? Too much?” He batted his mascara covered eyelashes.

Spike and the others stood stock-still a while longer, praying what they were seeing was just a sick dream and that they’d wake up realizing it never happened. No such luck was met. 

“Well, there’s one iconic image I can never ask Dash to dress in again.” 

All eyes shifted to Soarin, even Discord’s interest got peaked. 

“Sorain, not now,” Spike said with with his claws pinching the bridge of his snout. “Save whatever you do in the bedroom for later. Discord, please get out of that thing.” 

The slithery being of chaos wasn’t even trying to contain his laughter. Discord floated down from the top of the cake as he wiped an eye with a claw. “Oh, come now, gentlecolts, I’m just playing around.” He snapped his claws and his outfit was gone. “Besides, I wanted to show you all what the cake me and Pinkie whipped up looks like.” 

Spike narrowed his eyes on the mess of frosting on the floor and the gaping hole at the top of the cake. “You mean the one you destroyed a minute ago?”

One more snap of his his chicken claws and the frosting on the floor and on everyones’ coats and scales were gone in a flash of magic. The cake Discord popped out of flashed out of the room until it reappeared on a carrying cart completely void of the hole and looking pretty appetizing. The large dessert still retained its seemingly endless layers of baked goodness, but a quick count revealed it was seven differently frosted circular layers. Pink covered the bottom layer, topped by orange, then pale yellow, cyan, white, emerald green, and coating the top, a bright purple layer with 3 and 0 candles sticking out. Creamy white frosting tinted grey lined the circumference of each layer with a surprisingly organized precision no one thought Discord could possess. 

“Wow, Discord. This is amazing!” Spike drew a claw he didn’t even realize was reaching for a scrap of what was probably confectionery perfection back before he got any closer to ruining its flawless appearance. Flash and rest of the guys had similar looks of sudden hunger in their eyes. Suddenly Pinkie’s constant craving for foods like what was standing in front of them didn’t seem so crazy.  

“Why thank you, Spike. You knowwwww,” Discord practically sung out a pitch higher than his voice really should be, “maybe this birthday cake could also double as an engagement cake as well later on tonight. Ey, Flash?” 

Everypony matched Discord’s grin and inquisitive raise of the eyebrow aimed at Flash Sentry. The orange pegasus found himself unable to speak for a moment. Memories of previous attempts of what Discord was hinting at flashed in his mind; embarrassing, debatably hilarious, and stomach-churning memories. 

Soarin was the first to cut the silence. “Are you gonna try again, Flash?” 

A cross between a nervous and hopeful smile crossed Flash’s face. “Sixth time’s the charm, right?” 

“Seventh,” Spike corrected. “Remember? Twilight tried to make you dinner.” 

A pained look took over, and Flash clutched his stomach with a hoof. “I really don’t want to remember that,” he said through a few grunts. 

Caramel rolled his eyes. “Oh, c’mon, it couldn’t have been that bad.” 

“The doctors named a new condition after me because of it. Starting next year, you’ll see a picture of me in the medical books.” 

That remark sent Caramel’s ears back as he dragged out a long and sympathetic, “Ahhhhh.” 

Flash didn’t know whether or not the casualness of the conversation topic at hoof was a good or bad thing. By now, all the formalities were long exhausted after Flash talked it over with Spike, Shining, Night Light, and Twilight Velvet the first two or three times. And going for it again got easier and easier with each catastrophic failure. The bad side; there were that many catastrophic failures to make a conversation like theirs casual. 

Spike was one of the few who knew how downtrodden Flash really felt about failing so many times at something he poured a lot of thought and soul into. So it was no surprise to the pegasus that the dragon was the one to wrap a reassuring arm around his shoulder and smile. “Hey, lucky number seven. You guys’ll be fine. Plus, me and Shining would like another brother.”  

A small sentiment, but it was just what Flash wanted to hear, if not needed to hear. “Thanks, Spike,” he said before patting the dragon’s shoulder. “So how much longer till the party?” 

Spike’s claw hung in the air as he gave it a steadying gesture. “Eh, about an hour.” 

Discord looked around as he messed around with the colors of the cake. “Where is the birthday princess anyway?” 

“She’s out with Cadance,” Spike answered. “No idea where they went to though.”


***


Twilight trusted Cadance. She trusted her with her life and nearly anything else near and dear to her, but as she followed her fellow disguised alicorn princess through the streets of Canterlot without so much as a hint of where they were going, that trust had a hard time stopping any trace of worry from forming. 

The streets were familiar enough. They were closer to Canterlot Castle than they were just a few minutes ago after Twilight’s public freakout, but an unfamiliar turn led by Cadence directed the two to an array of narrowing streets. The streets they were walking on narrowed even more until Twilight was forced to trail from behind. Even though she lived in the area around Canterlot Castle before and again now, Twilight never really explored the entirety of the area, let alone the city she once again called home. Cadance on the other hoof was like a living map as she navigated maze-like strips of what could be called streets without a single misstep. She stopped in front of two swinging doors and looked up at the chipping paint on the sign above. 

“Hole in the Wall”

“Here it is,” Cadance announced with a nostalgic smile. “Not the best name, I know, but wait till you get inside.” 

Without waiting for a response, Cadance pushed and stepped through the swinging doors. Twilight followed with caution. Inside, she was met with the sight of numerous ponies laughing, talking, some roughhousing, and, of course, drinking. The small bar really did live up to its name. Anypony who didn’t know where the place was would probably have passed it up on their walk. Small wooden tables with two to three chairs each were scattered around the small bar, and neon signs and lights hung at varying angles all around the walls, illuminating the place in a rainbow of light. The ponies smiling and laughing over a few mugs reminded Twilight of the bar she and the others were at just a few months ago for Applejack’s birthday; a much needed change from the aristocratic and stuffiness of the surrounding area. Twilight couldn’t help but smile at the nostalgia the bar was bringing. 

A series of taps on wood brought Twilight’s attention to Cadance tapping a hoof on the wooden bar. She took a seat next to her fellow princess as a surprisingly brawny grey unicorn stallion with a thick, long black mane came up to where Cadance was tapping. His intimidating presence melted away instantly when a large grin crawled on his face. 

“Cadance!” The stallion said in a cherry whisper, the gruffness in his voice still coming out despite his efforts to keep his volume down. 

“Fill Up,” Cadance greeted back, matching the stallion’s grin. “How long’s it been?” 

“Too long. Thought you’d finally forgotten about my little place here. How’s Shiny doin’? Been a while since I’ve seen your lightweight around.” 

“He’s good. What about you and Red Cross?” 

“You know him, another day, another fire to fight. Next month will be our twentieth you know.” 

Cadance lit up and brought a hoof to her mouth, unable to stop the little squee that came out. “Awww, so glad to hear that.” 

“What about you and Shiny?” 

She tossed her head back with a small laugh. “Thirteen years now. Still feels like yesterday he was struggling to talk in complete sentences to me and not drown in a pool of his own sweat.”

That got a few muffled laughs out of the older unicorn. “You’ll need to tell me more about those days some time.” Fill Up began to duck down to pull out a mug for Cadance when his eyes finally caught sight of the other unicorn next to Cadance. “Hello ma’am,” he greeted with a smile before returning his attention to Cadance. “Who’s your friend?” 

Twilight, who had been stunned silent that Cadance was using her real identity in front of this stallion, looked at her sister-in-law, who just smiled at her before she returned her attention back to Fill Up. 

“Fill Up,” Cadance began before going into a whisper, “I’d like you to meet my sister-in-law, Twilight Sparkle.” 

Now it was Fill Up’s turn to be surprised. His eyes widened only for a second before that friendly smile returned. “Well happy birthday, your majesty,” he said, careful now to keep his voice quiet from anypony possibly listening in. 

Weird as the whole situation felt at somepony knowing her through the disguise, it still didn’t stop Twilight from being polite and smiling back at the bartender. “Thank you.” She tried not to sound hesitant, but both Cadance and Fill Up could tell this whole thing was hard for Twilight to wrap her head around. 

“It’s okay, your majesty. Your secret’s safe with me.” He extended a hoof. 

Twilight took his hoof and gave it a shake with a warm smile. “Thank you, but you can just call me Twilight.” She saw Fill Up brighten up even more even after they released each other from their grips. “So how do you know Cadance?”

“Oh that.” He gave a chuckle that reverberated through the air. “She came in here with your brother and some of the other guards one night and practically downed half the bar by herself. She’s even got the same disguise she had on that night!”

Twilight quickly turned to Cadance with wider-than-plate eyes. Cadance was all smiles before she gave a small laugh of her own. “What? It was my 21st birthday, and after all the royal celebration stuff was over with, Shining and some of his friends took me over here. Been coming back here ever since.” 

The look of shock Twilight had still remained. “You’re a mother.”

“Doesn’t mean I can’t have fun every now and then. When you have kids, you’ll see what I mean. Believe it or not, it does help to just let loose every now and then. In your case, you probably need to melt.” 

Lips curved in a small frown, Twilight was about to protest until two mugs held in Fill Up’s orange magic landed in front of the two princesses. 

“So which of my poisons would you like to loosen you up?” Fill Up’s bright yellow eyes shifted to Twilight. “Or melt you?” 

About to say something once again, Twilight found herself interrupted again, this time by a drink order Cadance must have planned out beforehoof. “One Crystal Haze, you know how I like it, and an Unwinder.” 

With the drinks in mind, Fill Up wasted no time. His magic sparked up again, engulfing numerous bottles of various liquids in an orange glow. It was a blur to both mares. One shake here, an add in of something there, another shake there, a few drops there, and, of course, the paper umbrella to top things off. He slid the mugs back with a proud smile. “Drink up, ladies.” 

Cadance took hers and gulped. She shivered a little at the sudden coolness on on her tongue. “Ahh, I’ve missed this.” 

Twilight looked down at her own drink, The Unwinder, she remembered. The name itself was enough to make her frown a little. Ignoring her irritation, the little umbrella floating atop her drink swirled around in a pleasant flow in a pool of purple, drawing the alicorn to peer even further into her drink. “Uhh,” she said uneasily, “what’s in this?” 

“Does it matter?” Cadance said before taking another swig. “If there’s anypony in Equestria that needs a drink right now, it’s you.” 

“I don’t need one,” Twilight protested, only getting a “Really?” look from Cadance. 

“You panicked in the streets and had a melt down out of nowhere, and our little breathing exercises aren’t doing anything. Unless you have another plan.” Cadance took her mug and dangled it in the air, hinting at it with all the subtlety of a clown blowing a flugelhorn. It was enough to get Twilight to take a second look at the drink. When she looked up, Fill Up met her gaze. Still smiling, he gestured to her drink. Twilight could practically feel the eagerness radiating from the stallion for her to try his concoction. If she didn’t need a drink before, two sets of eyes expecting something sure made her need one now. 

Twilight’s mug was already halfway to her muzzle before she even realized it. Something inside her made her stop and stare at her drink, eyebrows creasing into a guilty look. She moaned a little. “I really don’t wanna say this is my answer to relax,” she said, motioning with her mug. 

Both ponies got where Twilight was going, but it didn’t stop Cadance from trying. “Then how about a toast?” She raised her mug. Fill Up mixed something up quick and poured it in another mug before raising it up as well. “To the birthday mare.” A smile took form on Twilight’s lips, signaling her praise for the idea as Cadance went on. “I’ve known her since she was a foal, and have seen her wow ponies left and right throughout the years. From student to princess, she still remains the same kind-hearted, intelligent, humble, and borderline manic pony everyone loves.” The last description brought a scowl that lasted only a second after Twilight saw the proud and beaming faces of Cadance and Fill Up. “To Twilight, one of the most amazing ponies I’m glad I can call my sister-in-law, and even better, my friend. Happy birthday, Twilight.”

“Happy birthday, Twilight,” Fill Up echoed. Neon lights shimmered in Twilight’s eyes when she brought her mug up to meet the others’ in a wooden *CLANK before the three of them took a gulp. 

For Twilight, her experience with her drink differed greatly from Cadance and Fill Up. With them, it was simply another downing of something with alcohol and other flavorings, whereas for her, it was something much more interesting. Once the initial sting of the alcohol left, very quickly, to her surprise, tropical flavors danced on her tongue and splashed around as she swallowed. The drink washed down, cooling her throat and esophagus like something otherworldly. Flash, possible mishaps, her public meltdown, it all seemed to wash away as her drink traveled down her throat.  

“Drink lives up to its name, doesn’t it?” Fill Up was trying to hold in a chuckle, but it escaped nonetheless when Twilight finally snapped out of her trans of sensations. Before she knew it, she took another swig out of her mug, nearly taking the paper umbrella in her throat as well the mug’s contents. 

“Mmm, this is really good,” Twilight said once she set her mug down. “Think I can get another after this one?” 

Orange filled Twilight’s view when Fill Up’s magic sparked up. Soon enough, he slid another mug out to her hoof. “No charge, and happy birthday, Twilight.” 

Twilight took the mug with her free hoof and gave her thanks. “So, Fill Up, can I ask you something?” 

“Sure, anything.” 

“When you asked Cadance how Shining, her ‘little lightweight’, was, what did you mean by that?” 

Cadance and Fill Up met each other’s gazes, smirk smiles crossing their lips. “Oh, that,” Fill Up started while Cadance took another drink, emptying her mug. 

Twilight listened like she was all ears at the stories Cadance and Fill Up told. Shining, she found out, was by no means a light weight. Compared to what his wife could down without getting tipsy, that was a different story, and a little unnerving to Twilight, but she figured everypony did crazy stuff sometime in their lives. For the next hour or so, the three spent the time talking about anything and everything. Shining became a major talking point for a while, and the laughter shared told it was not about his best moments. From Shining, to the dull duties of princess hood, and its more exciting aspects, to the wildest customers a bartender can see, anything was game, even foals. 

“We had to spend two hours cutting into the crystal walls just to get him out.” Cadance was going on about an incident Sky Dive and Heartfelt thought they could combine each others talents and make a pony fly through solid crystal. It half worked. Twilight and Fill Up were clutching their sides as they tried not to fall over. 

Finally, when their laughs actually caused pain instead of pleasure, Fill Up pulled himself together and wiped his eye. “Wooo, enjoy them while their young Cadance. As kids, they may break things, later in life, they break you. Trust me on that, me and Red Cross know.”

Within the hour or so spent, Cadance and Fill Up drained mugs of whatever down like they hadn’t had anything to drink in ages. Mugs littered the bar in clusters, some overturned, yet the two were still sitting up and speaking coherently. Twilight on the other hoof still had a small amount left over from her second mug ordered nearly an hour ago. Once the chatter between the three settled down a bit, it didn’t take Fill Up long to see Twilight’s dismal mug count. 

“You’re not gonna want another, Twilight?” he asked. 

She shook her head. “I probably shouldn’t. I’m only on this one and I already feel a little lightheaded.” 

“Return of Princess Lightweight!” Cadance cheered with a teasing smiled aimed at Twilight.

“Return?” Fill Up asked with peaked interest and a raised eyebrow.

“She and some of her friends were at a wedding in Las Pegasus a month ago, things got a little crazy after just a few drinks, and then she comes home with a tattoo on her—”

“Nopony needs to know where!” Twilight cut in a little more louder than she would have liked. The red spreading on her cheeks however was Cadance’s calling card to go on.  

“It was her coltfriend’s cutie mark.” 

Full on laughter erupted from the brawny unicorn, and it didn’t help the red on Twilight’s cheeks from spreading, nor her annoyance to rise. She felt Cadance nudge her on the shoulder. “Hey, at least you got it off.”

Twilight cringed. “I can still feel the burn.” 

“So you’re not gonna want anything else then?” Fill Up asked. 

“Got anything without alcohol?”

Fill Up ducked under the bar again and reemerged a few seconds later with a clear glass filled to the brim with another drink. He slid the glass over and Twilight gripped it in her hoof. “Sweet Iced Tea good?” 

“It’s perfect,” she answered after taking a nice cool sip of the sweet drink. It was a refreshing chaser after having her mind close to swimming from her last two drinks. 

Cadance eyed the glass for a moment before she tapped the bar once. “Hey, Fill Up, can you get me the good tea?” Another glass was already sliding towards Cadance’s hoof before she could finish her request. 

“Should I just get the refills out now?” he asked with a toothy, knowing grin. He got a smirk from Cadance and a nod from Twilight, already indulged in her icy beverage. In a blur of grey, Fill Up was under the bar again, leaving Cadance and Twilight staring ahead at the wall of the bar. Pictures of Fill Up and a few loyal customers, Cadance in her disguise included, were taped and plastered onto the wall along with a few neon signs of general quotes and drink brands. The thing that caught Cadance’s attention however was the cyan neon light of a clock now in full view without Fill Up standing in its way. With one look of the time, Cadance pulled a bag of bits out of her sweater pocket. She placed it on the bar and scooted her seat back before hopping off. 

“Actually, just give Twilight hers. I need to get going.”

Twilight turned to Cadance with a raised brow as Fill Up came back up with a few filled mugs in his magic. “Why do you need to leave?” 

Since she was in on the surprise party, Cadance quickly came up with a not-so-stretch from the truth excuse. “Guess which certain husband of mine thought he could pick a good gift for you at the last minute.” 

A groan served as Twilight's response. “Again?”

“Again,” Cadance said with a flat tone. “That’s why I give Shining a list when our anniversary comes around. I’m just gonna make sure he doesn’t get you something… what are the words I’m looking for?”

“Complete crap.”

“That works. Just go back to the castle after you, Celestia, and Luna get dinner, and I’ll make sure you get your gift.” Cadance was already halfway to the exit when Fill Up started waving a hoof. 

“Hey, don’t be a stranger. Swing by sometime soon,” he called out. 

“Count on that, Fill Up.” With that, Cadance was out the swinging doors. Moments later, she was out of the alley and back on the open streets of Canterlot before she lit her horn and disappeared in a flash of magic. 

Back inside, Twilight swiveled in her seat back to face the bar and Fill Up’s questioning eyes. “Dinner with the other princesses?” he asked.

“It’s kinda been a little family pass along today.” Her gaze drifted downwards into her now empty glass. She twirled around with the straw, turning the ice inside. “I think I need to apologize to them though. I wasn’t exactly in the best state of mind before Cadance took a turn with me.” 

“How so?”

“I was a bit of a nervous wreck earlier.” 

“You seem better now.” 

Twilight couldn’t help but smile. “I am, thanks to her… and the drinks,” she added the last part with a little embarrassment. “I do worry too much sometimes.” The swirling ice in her glass she was focusing on kept a steady rhythm going around and around, and it was starting to affect Twilight. She didn’t notice at  first, but the swirling just in her glass became the swirling of her body on the seat. A few seconds of this, Twilight came to a stop and she placed her glass on the bar. “Woo, think I’ll take some of that tea now.” She grabbed the glass closest to her as the world began to stay in place again. Not even thinking about it, she took the straw in her mouth and took a drink. The same cool refreshing feel came back, but for some reason, there was a kick to the drink. She held the glass in her hoof and stared quizfully at it. “Fill Up, did you add something to this?” 

“No, why?”

“This tastes different. I mean its good, but there’s something about it.” 

The drinks on the bar Fill Up set down just a few moments ago suddenly became a center of worry for the bartender. “Twilight?” he asked with a slowly as he gestured to the cluster of glasses. “Which side of this did you grab that glass from?” 

Twilight looked down at the glasses.” Ugh…” She held a hoof out to the side closest to her. “Here, why?” Now she was getting worried, and the crack  in her voice was proof. “I got Cadance’s tea didn’t I?”

Fill Up just stayed silent. 

“Did I?” 

“Maybe.” 

“Maybe! Well, which of these were Cadance’s?”

His mouth opened and closed a few times, only a few high pitched ugh’s and umm’s coming out until he finally, and regretfully admitted, “I have no idea.”

Twilight’s eyes swung straight back to the glass in her hoof and the twirling ice in her glass. At least, she thought it was twirling. When she looked up, the room was wobbly, or was it just her, even as she was sitting? The pieces in her mind were already connecting as to what she just drank, and when they finished, it hit her hard. “Oh, no.”


***


Guests flooded into the castle like a technicolor river. Unicorns, Pegasi, and Earth Ponies alike, most in nice clothing, and others completely decked out in their fanciest attire for a party for the princess. Admittingly, the attire for the party turned up with a more formal tone, but with a party for a princess, ponies had a tendency to go all out despite the note in the invite that actually encouraged a casual dress. 

Blotched in black checkmarks, Pinkie’s invite list on Spike’s clipboard seemed just about full. Everypony invited that said they could make it was present and accounted for. 

While the guests mingled, a certain orange pegasus was making his way down the hall to the party room with a neatly wrapped gift wrapped in one of his wings. Flash, now dressed in a nice jacket, trotted down the hall and into the room where Spike and his family were all gathered for the final checkup. 

Spike was the first to get a glimpse of the pegasus, and waved him over to join in. “Hey, Flash. What’cha need?” 

“To propose right.” Night Light’s shushed remark didn’t completely fall on deaf ears. He felt a sharp jab at his side, and saw the piercing eyes of his wife standing next to him. “It was a joke!” he said through a few coughs. 

Hoping to redirect the issue, Spike stepped towards Flash with a very forced grin. “Uh, buh, hey! Is that for Twilight?” 

Flash took the wrapped box from under his hoof. “Yeah, where should I put it?” 

A lavender light engulfed Flash’s gift before it was lifted from his hold. “Allow me,” Velvet said before guiding the gift to a full table by Discord’s cake. There was an uneasiness to her when she faced Flash again, and if it wasn’t the strained smile she tried to keep that gave it away, then the way it spread to Night Light, Shining Armor, and Spike did. Even Flash found himself feeling the need just to put on a grin just to match the others. It wasn’t until after a few moments of awkward silence that Velvet finally gave a groan. “Oh for the love of—” She jabbed her husband in the side again, making him clutch the area. “You just had to feel like joking around right this moment.”

Flash echoed Velvet’s groan with a roll of his blue eyes. “It’s fine, Mrs. Velvet. At this point, I’m surprised more ponies aren’t talking about it.” 

They just stood there, averting their looks from the pegasus.

“More ponies do talk about it, don’t they?” 

Nopony really wanted to confirm Flash’s guess, but the nervous grins and strong silence did it for them. 

“Only when you’re nowhere around,” Shining tried, as if his answer helped. It wasn’t long before Shining felt a jab at his side as well. 

Velvet sighed before she put on a more sympathetic look. “Flash, you know we already consider you part of the family. And I think we all know how you and Twilight feel for each other.” Just the mention of Twilight brought a light to Flash’s eyes. “We just really want this to work out. Sooooo…” Velvet began to scuff at the floor with her hoof. “... are you going to try again tonight?” 

The nod and hopeful smile Flash gave off sent exhausted, but still burning faith through Velvet’s body. Just to see something this special not blow up in her daughter’s face for a seventh time was all she was asking for. Was it too much to ask? She stepped up closer to Flash, pleading eyes dead set on him. “Please just tell us how we can help so this doesn’t go wrong again. Because, no pressure, but any chances I see my daughter finding happiness with a stallion by now kinda lives and dies with you.” 

In that moment, Flash wondered to himself how one mare’s words delivered more pressure than what he felt being submerged at the bottom of the ocean would bring. 

A knock on the door brought him and the others out of whatever it was they were doing before a familiar voice called through. “Guys? You in there?”

“It’s open, Cadance,” Spike called. The door opened and and Cadance stepped through. Now free of her disguise, pink shone once again on her coat, and her candy-like mane flowed as the feathers in her wings ruffled a bit after finally being rid of the sweater that constrained them. 

“That your present,” Spike asked when he caught sight of the decent-sized box floating in the air in a cloud of light blue. 

“No, mine and Shining’s.”

“So yours.”

There really wasn’t any point in trying after her husband’s track record. “Yeeeeaah.” 

“Standing right here, guys,” Shining muttered. “And what was wrong with my gift anyway?” Four sets of eyes set on him, each with one eyebrow arched and a face that practically screamed “Really?”. Taking the hint, Shining just waved a hoof with a resigned sigh. “Forget I asked.” 

“Hey, Cadance,” Spike asked the alicorn, “how was Twilight while you had her?” 

Cadance could already see the worry on Spike’s face. She gave him a quick pat on his arm. “She’s better now. I took her out after she had a little, ugh, well, she kinda melted down in the middle of town.” All eyes widened. “But she’s better now!” She quickly added. A collective exhale was their response. “I took her to get a drink with an old friend of mine and Shining’s.” 

“Fill Up?” Shining asked. 

“Uh-Huh.” 

“Who?” Velvet and Night Light asked. 

“Don’t worry, guys,” Shining reassured. “She’s in good hooves.”


***


Twilight sat at her seat in the bar, swaying side to side like she was about to lose her balance and faceplant  onto the floor. “You know what?” she asked a very confused Fill Up. His expression was somewhere between concerned and ready to lose it at the sight of Twilight.

“No, what?” he asked back, trying to force the growing smile on his face to go away. 

“I worry… waaaaaaaayy too much!” Cadance’s tea went every which way when Twilight tried to gesture her point, but only got the floor wet before she started giggling for no apparent reason.

The old saying went that one drink lead to another. If the saying was true for accidental cases, Twilight was the living proof. The glasses Fill Up brought for her and Cadance before she left were now toppled over on the bar, some overturned and spilling whatever remnants remained onto the now slippery floor, and only a few remained untouched, leaving a very, very, very drunk Twilight going on about Celestia and Luna knows what in an animated and loopy fashion. Cadance’s mission to loosen her up was a success though, a little too much of a success. Even her body seemed looser as she swayed on her seat. Her eyelids even refused to stay up all the way, leaving a plastered look of dizziness, complete inebriation, and weirdly, induced happiness. 

Fill Up never offered more drinks once Twilight started inching to her current state, but the teas he left specifically for Cadance were just sitting there, and Twilight had already accidently begun. She was doomed once her lips touched that first accidental glass. 

“Aaand I’ll tell ya another thing.” Her speech was slurred and lazy. She held her hoof in the air and kept silent longer than a simple pause should be. Fill Up stood, still trying not to laugh, and waiting for her to continue on. A muffled laugh just came. “I totally forgot!” And then she went into hysterics. 

Not a stranger to drunk ponies, Fill Up generally knew how to deal with them; get help for the really dizzy ones, keep a bucket nearby, toss the angry ones out, and wait with the more fun ones until somepony came by to help them home. The latter was the general plan of action right now. Fill Up figured once Twilight didn’t show up on time for dinner with the princesses, Cadance would come by and take Twilight home. The plan seemed easy enough, and for the most part was easy enough. Fill Up passed the time waiting for Cadance mostly tending to other customers, entertaining Twilight in her drunken comments, even thought they were mostly entertaining him, and most importantly, cutting her off from further alcohol. 

“Do you usually get like this when you drink, Twilight? If you don’t mind me asking.”

Twilight looked up with a lazy gaze. She could’ve been tranquilized for all anypony could have known. She snickered more before she said, “I-I-I don’t puke from throwing up.”

“Oooookayyy,” Fill Up said slowly. “How about I get you some coffee while we wait?”

“Wait for what?” Twilight had to brace herself on the bar. “I almost face kissed the floor.” 

“For somepony to take you home,” he said while starting the brewer. 

“Flash is the only one who can take me home.” 

That one got the stallion to finally break into a full on roar of laughter. “Woo, you really are hammered.” 

“I think you’re right!” Twilight said as if discovering she was before going into another fit of giggles. “I’m drunk! I am drunk. Off my flank! WOOOOO!” She flung her hooves into the air, nearly falling back with the chair as more of her glass’s content spewed all over the floor. “This is the best tea I’ve ever had!” She randomly declared before taking the final swig of her glass. 

“Glad you liked it.”

“Where-Wh-Where? Oh! Where do I pay? For-For this awesome stuff?”

“It’s your birthday, you’re a friend, and you’ve been fun, no charge.” 

She blinked one eye at a time. “It’s my birthday? Oh, no, I forgot to get myself a gift.”

“I don’t think you need to worry about that, Twilight.”

“You are so right. No worries! Kn-Kn-Know what I shouldn’t do t-t-today? Worry!” she answered her own question without giving Fill Up a chance to even try. “Because when I worry… the worry takes over in-into another worry that-that takes me… ugh… i-i-into another thing that gets… gets me to worry, and that makes me worry even more. Get it?” 

Only through years of hearing familiar styled questions could Fill Up shake his head and truly mean the “yes” that followed. 

“Sing for me!” Twilight practically sung out, drawing a bewildered look from Fill Up and a few other nearby patrons.

“‘Cuse me?” 

“Sing me a birthday song. Any birthday song!”

He stood still for a moment. “Isn’t there only one?”

“Happy birthday to me!” she started off, completely out of pitch and more screaming than singing. “Happy birthday to me! I’m drunk off my ass and I…. really don’t give a buck!”

With that impromptu scream-song, Fill Up was grateful the brewer was finally done. “Okay,” he said a little uneasily, “coffee time for you, Twilight.” He poured her a cup and slid it on the bar. 

“Hey, man, where’s the tea. That was some goooood stuff,” she said with her slur. 

“I think you’ve had enough ‘tea’ for today.” 

She leaned across the bar. “C’moooon. What’s one more?”

“You passing out on the floor, or puking on it. Celestia and Luna know how many times that’s happened in here.” 

A little, dim light went off in Twilight’s mind at the mention of those two names. Through her blurred vision, she could make out some faded neon behind Fill Up on the wall, a clock. Even in her state, she was still able to tell it was way past the hour. “Hey, Fill Up? What time is it?”

He looked back. “7:25, why?”

That’s when the final gear turned. She gasped, and for the first time in a while, her eyes opened all the way up… only for them to come back down halfway and her lazy smile to return. “I’m soooooo late.” The giggles came out again. “I should… I should… castle… be…. there.” 

Before Twilight could even try and swivel her seat around to get up, Fill Up quickly brought some creamer and sugar and set it in her area. “Or you could stay here and drink this up before you try and head out anywhere.” 

She just flopped her head onto the counter. “I love this place,” she said while limply trying and failing to reach for the sugars. “I love you. I love your drinks. I love everything. More ponies should come here.” 

Even if it was drunk praise, it was praise nonetheless, and it brought a smile to Fill Up’s face at such love for his little bar. “Thanks, Twilight.” 

“I should bring Celestia and Luna here.” 

“That’d actually be nice.” 

Slowly, Twilight raised her head off the counter. “I should bring Celestia and Luna here.”

“Yeah. That’d be nice,” he said again, unaware that an idea was crawling through Twilight’s swimming mind. 

That idea finally found its place in her brain. “I should bring them here right now.” 

“I don’t know how you’re gonna—” His incomplete question found its answer when he noticed Twilight’s horn start to glow and collect in energy and light. 

“I’m gonna go bring them over here right now.” 

Panic set in and Fill Up rushed to the counter, waving his hooves in front of her. “No no no no no no, don’t do that! You don’t have to! Another time’s good!” 

She just kept swaying side to side and took her cup with the ridiculous look and smile on her face still there. “Don’t worry, I-I-I’ll be back. I’m gonna bring them here right now.” She swiveled in her seat to the other side, her horn glowing bright. Right before she hopped off with unbalance, she took her cup and fell face-forward off her seat, disappearing in a flash of light. 

Fill Up’s eyes adjusted to see spilled coffee on the floor and bar, and a bar with one less princess inside. 

“Yo, Fill? You alright,” one of the other patron called over upon seeing Fill Up’s wide eyes and stock still stance. 

He turned to the pony, slowly. “There is a drunk princess loose in Canterlot.” 


***


Out on the front steps of Canterlot Castle, all was a dead silence. Nothing but the rustling of nearby bushes and trees could be heard, and Luna’s moon hung in full lunar grace in the night sky, shining its reflected light down on the land below. It was the scene of tranquility, and could have remained as such had not a spark of magic flickered in the middle of the steps. 

A white light flash again before Twilight landed face-first on the stairs to the castle. Had she been in a better state of mind, pain might have registered. “The spell worked,” she announced to nopony as her head swam with dizziness and unfocused eyes somewhat landed on the castle door. “I need to be over there.” With wobbling legs, she picked herself up off the ground and started up the stairs. “Happy birthday to me! Happy birthday to me!”


***


Standing/Crouching and waiting in the dark were the standards for a surprise party, and it was done with patience and enthusiasm. More than twenty minutes of it however was another story, and was enough for the lights to come back on and ponies to start chattering about. 

Spike had already given the job to entertain guest to Pinkie and the rest of their friends until he sorted out what to do about the no-show guest of honor. For a while he just paced around the room, hoping to see Twilight through one of the wall-length windows. All he saw was a window full of gardens and stairs. “Where is she?” he said mostly to himself with a little frustration. 

“I don’t get it. I told her to come back to the castle to meet my aunts for dinner.”

Behind him, Cadance stood with some kind of sparkling drink in her magic and a somewhat worried look on her face. “Where did you guys go anyway,” Spike asked. 

“I just took her out to this bar near the castle. She and I had a few drinks and just talked with a friend of mine, but then I had to leave. She should’ve been back by now.” 

A small though came to Spike that out of all parties it could have happened, he hoped wouldn’t at this. “You don’t think she, ugh, maybe drank too much.”

“No,” Cadance answered, immediately calming Spike’s worries. “She switched to tea after two drinks. Maybe she just lost track of time?” The idea was met with a blank stare. 

“You are talking about Twilight, right? The mare who when I was little used to wake up with seven alarm clocks just so she’d be sure to not be late for school. That Twilight Sparkle?” 

“I can do without the sarcasm you know.”

“It’s a reflex, sorry.” With his attention back on the window, a slew of possibilities came to Spike’s mind, and for a moment, he understood what goes through Twilight’s head on a daily basis. He was not enjoying it. “Okay look, I’m gonna go out and try and look for her. Tell the girls to try and get everypony to quiet down a little, then stay by the door to see when I come back with her. 

“Shouldn’t I come with you? You don’t even know where—”

“Head out the castle, go straight, take a left at the first narrow alley, then look for ‘Hole in the Wall’. Shining showed me the place once, and me, him, and Flash have been going there for a while now,” Spike added in once he saw Cadance’s surprised expression. 

“So sentry duty?” she asked again.

Spike started towards the door. “Yeah, I’ll be back.” He shut the door once he was out and headed out of the hallway and towards the entryway of the castle. He trusted she’d be fine. Just because she was a little late once in her life didn’t mean something awful happened, at least that was what Spike was telling himself. He pushed his thoughts aside and reached for the handle on the front door. It jiggled a little before he touched it. He retracted his arm while the handle giggled a little more, then it stopped, followed by a soft thump on the other side. 

Curiosity now peaked, Spike threw the door open.

“Heeeeeeeeyyyy, you got the door open!” 

On sight was a very drunk Twilight on her haunches, barely propped up on one of her forelimbs and swaying from side to side with the same dizzy look she had back at the bar. On any other day, any other time, the sight Spike was taking in would’ve had him toppled over in a raucous laughter that could make the maddest of scientists sound sane. Instead, Spike just stood with wide eyes as disbelief wrote itself on his face like permanent marker. 

“Twilight,” he managed to say, “are you drunk?” Exactly why he asked when the obvious answer was in front of him, even he didn’t fully know. If anything, maybe there was a chance this simply wasn’t happening, slim as the chance may be, and that this was just a cruel joke Twilight was playing on him.

“Nooooooo,” Twilight answered before falling from her propped up position and onto the ground. She started to giggle. “I’m lying. I’m so, so, soooooo drunk. It’s great, Spike. This-This-This is a good birthday, Spike. Wanna sing with me?” 

With newly destroyed hopes, Spike responded with unintelligible mutters until he started sputtering random one-worded questions in a rather twitchy way. “How?!? When?!? Why?!?” 

“Woah, Spike,” Twilight spoke softly. “Just calm down. You’re worryin’ too much.” 

‘Huh, so that’s what everyone sounds like to her.’ Spike brushed the thought away and rushed to help Twilight on her hooves. She may have wobbled the entire time, but he eventually got her onto all fours. 

“Thaaaaanks, Spike. You know you’re always there for me? I love you so much.” With that, she lost her balance and slumped into one of Spike’s arms before another round of sporadic snickers came about. “Can you help me remember why I’m here?”

“Twilight.”

She stood up straighter all of a sudden. “Oh yeaaaaaah, I was gonna take Sun and Moon to the place. Have you been to the place, Spike? It’s sooooo fun.” 

“Twilight.”

With a groggy turn of her head, Twilight eyes were right on Spike’s “What’s daily, Scaly?” 

If Spike needed another sign all this was indeed happening, Twilight’s breath was the final indicator. One smell made him scrunch up his nose in disgust. “Ack! Sheesh, Twi, how much did you drink? What did you drink anyway?”

“It was… a lot? But it was just tea. Best tea I’ve ever had in my life. We should go back and get some! We can take Celestia and Luna.” She started to tug on Spike’s arm. “C’mooooon, Spikey, let’s go get ‘em.”

“Twi.” He held her in place as he kept her steady on her hooves.  “Twi, you need to listen to me real quick.”

She gave a nod with a goofy grin. “Suuuuure, anything for you, Spike. Shoot.” 

“Okay, Twi, here’s the thing, all of us; Mom, Dad, Shining, Cadance, the girls, me, we all planned out this surprise party for you. All of our family, friends from Ponyville, here... everyone is inside there waiting for you.” 

Genuine surprise actually took hold of Twilight for one of the first times that night. Her jaw hung open and she brought a hoof to her open mouth. “No,” she gasped.

“Yes,” Spike replied with some panic. 

“No.”

“Yes!”

And then the laughing started up again. “Oh, no. This is soooo bad.” It didn’t seem that way with the wide and uncontrolled grin on Twilight’s face. “Oh, no, Mom and Dad have never seen me drunk before.”

Spike hesitated a little while. “Weeeeell, not exactly. Remember your twenty-first birthday and you said you weren’t gonna drink, but it wasn’t till after Mom and Dad left that you did?”

“Yeah, why?”

“That’s just what we told you. Me, Dash, and Pinkie kinda slipped you some of Cadance’s cider and you kinda, ugh, tried to dry hump against Flash right in front of them.”

For the second time in her state of mind, Twilight was written with shock, despite the droopiness of her eyelids that still remained. She just gasped and tried to hit Spike’s side with her hooves. To him, it mostly felt like being swatted by a dizzy butterfly. “You assholes!” she said like she was suppressing a laugh. “You assholes!” 

Spike let her continue her failure of hits for a few more seconds before he took hold of her hooves and set them down. “Twi, focus. There is a whole crowd of ponies waiting for the guest of honor; you!” he made sure to emphasize when he saw Twilight’s questioning look. 

“And I’m drunk!” she said rather merrily. “Oh, wait! That’s the problem.” 

“Okay, okay, it’s alright, it’s alright. We can get through this. I’ll get you some coffee from the kitchen, I’ll let Cadance and the girls know, and we’ll get you through this. Nopony will know.”

“You sure?” It really was the question of the decade, but the alternative was a party without the guest of honor. 

“Positive.” Spike was actually thankful Twilight was too out of it to see the strain of his smile and the uncertainty in his voice. “First, do you think you can ditch the disguise?” 

At first, Twilight didn’t know what he was talking about, but one look at her hooves reminded herself she wasn’t usually blue. “Pfffft, of course I can.” A series of failed charges of magic later, Twilight finally reverted back to her normal lavender shade and natural manestyle. Now with Twilight looking like Twilight, the real first challenge of the night began; getting her to walk like she wasn’t drunk. 

The walk back into the castle and into the desired hallway was in itself a sight to see. For Spike, it was like trying to teach a foal how to walk again. Even at that, he was pretty sure Heartfelt and Sky Dive didn’t wobble this much… or faceplant into the floor three times in twenty seconds. Once a rhythm came to Twilight, she was better in control, even if just a little bit. 

Spike turned a corner to see a pink blur and a tri-colored tail retreat back into the door. He knew Cadance had seen them and was telling everypony on the other side to quiet down and hide. They reached the front of the door. 

“Okay, Twi, ready?”

Twilight broke away from her scaly temporary crutch and took a few practice steps. “Yeah,” she said with a few more nods than was necessary. This should be something to see. 

“Remember, it’s a surprise party. Act surprised, stay close to me, smile, and try not to talk so much.” 

“Aye Aye, Captain!” 

Not wanting to dwell on what that one response made him feel, Spike took the knob in his claw and opened the door. 

“SURPRISE!” 

Music started and the lights went on as ponies, and Discord, popped up from anywhere they could hide in a burst of energy and, not so surprisingly, confetti, streamers, and balloons. Keeping up with Spike’s instructions, Twilight feigned surprise. The only problem; it came in the form of a scream louder than expected, or hoped on Spike’s part. Thankfully, nopony thought too much of it once Twilight started talking. 

“Wow, thanks guys. Got me good right there.” She was pointing a hoof with a sly grin aimed at no one in particular, and her tone started to drag. 

Spike quickly reacted when he saw her legs begin to shake. “Happy birthday, Twilight!” he announced in a booming voice. The guests cheered even louder, giving Spike a chance to help Twilight recover her hoofing and make his way through the crowd. Thankfully, most of the ponies had already helped themselves to the drinks and snacks offered and were already in party mode before they came in. It made the usual “thanks for coming” more than enough to sustain whatever guest they came up to. Spike knew Celestia and Luna would be harder to please than with just simple thanks, so he made sure to steer away from those two at least for now. 

With only some complication, Spike lead Twilight through the crowd of guest to their already eager friends, each waiting to congratulate their friend. They did, but once they saw Spike’s less than excited look, questions quickly rose. 

Rarity was first to the punch. “Spike, dear, what’s wrong?” 

The answer came with a sluggish grin as Twilight leaned in and whispered, “It’s a secret.” She motioned for the others to get closer. They did with unease before Twilight put a hoof by the side of her mouth. “I’m drunk,” she said with a rasp in the very poor whisper even Pinkie couldn’t have done worse at. 

Twilight’s shaky balance became more apparent to the rest of her friends, as well as the very traceable signs of alcohol on her breath that made her friends back up a bit. 

“Rarity,” Spike said, getting his wife’s attention. “I need you to take Twilight to her room and buy us some time to see what we’re gonna do about… this.” 

Rarity was at Twilight’s side in a flash. “Okay, Spike. I think I have just the excuse.” He was about to ask, but lost out on his chance when Rarity took Twilight’s hoof a made a mad dash through the crevices of the guests. “Emergency, ponies!” she cried in her chirpy tone. “Birthday mare needs a birthday dress!” Both ponies were last seen in purple and white blurs before the door in the front slammed shut. 

First to ask what was on everypony’s mind, with all the tact of splintered wood, Rainbow Dash asked, “So what’s with Cirrhosis the Alicorn?” 

After an eyeroll, Spike faced his friends. “I don’t know. I found her at the front of the castle like that.” He started to rub at the sides of his head. “Uh, this isn’t good.”

“So she’s drunk at a party,” Applejack joined in. “Not like anypony can’t say they haven’t been at least once in their life.”

“Besides,” Pinkie chirped with a bounce, “Drunk Twilight is a lot more fun than Normal Twilight.”  

“Yeah,” Spike shamefully admitted, “but most ponies aren’t princesses of Equestria. And it’s not just that.”

“What’s not just what?”

Spike turned around to see Cadance standing behind him. Over her head, he could see Shining, Flash, Night Light, and Twilight Velvet approaching as well. He figured he might as well break the news in one go. He waited out the initial questions of his family about Twilight until he got them to settle down and listen. Explaining she was drunk was easy enough, two words in fact. “Twilight’s drunk.” 

Out of all the immediate responses Twilight Velvet could’ve gone with, she decided on, “Does that mean I’m going to have to wait even longer for my daughter to get engaged.” Even Flash joined in the collective slow turn of heads as everyone’s eyes creeped to meet Velvet’s own. “Not the time?” she wearily asked, already knowing the answer. 

“Anyway,” Spike went on, “so Twilight’s drunk, that’s out of the way, and all of you know. It needs to stay just between us.” He made sure to punctuate the last part. Before the party had started, Cadance had filled him, Shining, their parents, and the girls in on why Twilight was so wound up earlier in the day. It went without saying why Twilight needed her incident to be kept secret from the rest of the party. As if they were about to tell her the next morning when all of this was over how everypony at the party was talking about the drunk birthday princess dancing on tabletops before passing out on the floor in a pile of her own shame and puke. 

With the plan to keep Twilight appearing sober agreed upon, each of them broke off to entertain guests and be ready to pull Twilight in should she somehow wander off or start talking more than what would lead to suspicion.

“Sorry, Flash,” Spike said to the pegasus before he went off to find a spot in the room. 

Flash just put on a smile until Spike was mostly out of sight. His lips uncurled into a small frown as he brought a hoof to a pocket on the chest of his jacket. There, he felt the lump of the little box placed in there just hours ago. “Maybe next time.”

Roughly twenty minutes later, Rarity reentered the party room where everything was in full swing. DJing the party, the same white mare from Spike and Rarity’s wedding was switching, playing, and mixing records this way and that, finally getting the accidental formal tone of the party to loosen up. 

“This way, darling,” she called behind her. A small flop on the floor later, Twilight came into the room wearing a simple pink dress, intricately accented with various purple and blue shades at the edges, and further styled with some sequence around the torso, collar, and end of the dress. With Rarity as her guide, she somewhat glided down the room as she fluttered her wings and set off the sequence’s shine. With the way she was dressed, and maybe it was an impromptu plan Rarity concocted, Twilight was able to hide her plastered state rather well. All eyes were on what she was wearing and less on her drifting eyes and, at times, wobbly walk, and she was able to travel with her friend and only had to say her thanks to the many compliments and birthday wishes she was getting. 

“Doing good so far, dear,” Rarity said as she looked on for one of their friends, eventually seeing Spike through a few other guests. 

“Thaaaaanks, you’re doing good too.” Whatever that meant, Rarity took it as a compliment and lead the two of them towards Spike’s direction.

“How’s she doing, Rares?” Spike asked when the two approached.

“I swear, Spike, it was like watching Sweetie Belle learn how to walk all over again.”  

“Oh, c’mon, I wasn’t that bad,” Twilight said before drifting side to side. 

“Try to stand still, darling. So what’s the plan, Spike?” 

Spike filled her in; make sure someone in their group is with Twilight at all times, walk around and act like everything is fine, pull her aside if somepony gets too chatty, and above all else, don’t let anypony give her more to drink. Rarity nodded in agreement before Spike stepped closer. “You did great with her dress, honey.”

“Thank you, darling,” Rarity said with pride, despite that her dress’s model looked like she was about to fall over at the slightest touch. “Twilight, dear, how much did you drink, if you don’t mind me asking.” 

Twilight started to count in silence while tracing her hoof in the air. “I-I remember the first one, then after the third one, it made six.”

Spike groaned. “In other words, too much. I’ll take over, Rarity. Go entertain guests, and I’ll keep an eye on Twi.” 

“Alright, darling.” Rarity trotted away to mingle. It didn’t take long for somepony to start  chatting it up with her, so Spike, with Twilight beside him went around the room as well. 

For the most part, Spike’s plan was simple enough, and played out to a varying success. Just like earlier in the day, Twilight found herself passed along from pony to pony. Each of her friends and family being her company and damage control at least once throughout the first few hours of the party. It took some creative explaining to Sky Dive about why Auntie Twilight looked and talked a little funny and why her breath smelled so weird. 

“Oh, you mean like when Great Aunt Luna tried to have that ‘Traditional’ party at the castle and the next morning you found her—”

“Eh, ugh, well,” Cadance struggled to say as her eyes darted anywhere, “not... well... something less drastic like that.” 

Sky Dive looked back at Twilight. “Are we gonna have to get a pick axe tomorrow morning?” 

“Go ask your father.” 

With a foal’s curiosity peaked combined with an order from his mother, Sky Dive went off to look for Shining Armor. He found him and Heartfelt across the room, and from what Cadance could tell, he was not liking the question his son brought up. “Your problem,” she mouthed when Shining looked at her. 

“Luna did what again?” Flash stood at Cadance’s side while Twilight helped herself to some of the treats sprawled across one of the food tables.

“I”ll tell you later. How’s Twilight holding up?” 

“Hey look guys, its rainbow cupcakes!” There was a splatter of frosting as Twilight smashed two multicolored cupcakes together. “Now it-it’s a mega rainbow cupcake!”

“Could be worse,” Flash deadpanned. This was not how he imagined tonight to go. 

“Hey, you guys’ll get it right,” Cadance said, as if she could read Flash’s mind. “Keep in mind this is coming from the Princess of Love.” 

That at least got a smile out of the orange pegasus. “Thanks, Cadance.” He trotted next to the table and got a few napkins before he came up to Twilight. “Twilight, you got a little frosting in your mane.” He proceeded to wipe off any mess off of Twilight. “You’re doing great by the way. Just a few more hours, and we’ll put you in bed, and this’ll all be over.”

Twilight just seemed to have a dazed look, like nothing was getting through to her and her own thoughts were left to a twisted and hazy road. That road lead her to put on a giddy smile, lower her eyelids, and poke him in the chest. “You are so handsome, you know that?” She brushed a wing against his side. “Maybe you should be the one to put me to bed.” There was a bit of emphasis on the last few words that made Flash remember the way she got when she was drunk. Before he had a chance to even take a step back, she grabbed at his jacket and pulled him closer so they were eye-to-eye. “I wanna make love to you right here right now!” 

Cadance had heard everything. “I really wish you wouldn’t.” 

Flash tried to pull away as he cleared his throat. “Twilight, maybe you should—”

“C’mon, it’s your birthday! Let me do this for you.” Now she threw her other forelimb over his shoulder and slumped down, nearly dragging Flash down with her. She wasn’t letting go. 

“It’s your birthday, Twilight.” 

She looked up, a few strands of her mane now hanging down in front of her eyes and out of place. “Then do this for me.” 

She tried to lean into his face for a kiss, but Flash brought his own hooves to her shoulders and gently tried to push her off. She still held onto him, but gave up on her attempted kiss when she started to swing back and forth. “Is the room spinny? I think the room’s spinny.”

“It’s just you, honey.” 

Twilight’s grip loosened and Flash was able to pull himself away, only for him to be grabbed once again by his marefriend. “I’m not done with you yet, Flashy,” she said in a sing-song tune.

“Twilight,” Flash struggled to say, a part of him giving the slightest consideration to actually going with Twilight’s dirty thoughts, “I really don’t think now’s the best time.” 

By now, a few ponies had their attention on the two of them. Flash began to sweat a little at the sudden unwanted attention while Cadance tried to wave off the ponies’ attention. 

“Why noooot? Twilight practically whined with a small pout on her face. 

“Because…” Flash darted his eyes, looking for something, anything. “Because…” He dug through his mind as he felt Twilight inch closer and closer, swaying a little as she started to brush up against him. He’d be lying if he said he wasn’t enjoying it a little, but he knew he had to think of something. “Because the cake’s about to be brought out!” Flash suddenly said.

Just then, the lights went out. There were a few screams and drops of plates before red siren lights went on in the room, accompanied by the blaring of sirens. Hooves covered ears and eyes clenched as everypony wondered what was going on. A few seconds of unbearable noise later, a large spotlight went on that pointed to the door. Everypony held their breaths as an invisible drum roll began. Once the drum roll ended, the doors nearly swung off their hinges as an explosion of confetti, streamers, and balloons went off in a cascade of colors. From the explosion, a large wheeled cart rolled in carrying a large, multicolored, seven-layered cake, with Discord pushing at the handle. 

“Haaaaappy birthday, Twilight!” Discord announced merrily, his voice coming through like the sirens just a minute ago. The panic and fear that was present instantly melted into cheer as ponies echoed Discord’s thoughts to their princess. The lights returned to normal, and Twilight finally backed off of Flash with a wide smile on her face at the numerous ponies wishing her happy birthday, something she remembered now was in fact today. It didn’t take long after the cake’s grand entrance that Discord started off the birthday song and was soon joined by everyone in the room.

“Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday, dear, Princess Twilight! Happy birthday to you!” 

The room roared with cheer and applause for the birthday mare, and Twilight was beaming with joy. 

“How’d you know Discord was bringing in the cake?” Cadance asked Flash through the cheering ponies. 

“I didn’t,” Flash said before he heard a snap go off. Before anypony knew it, Twilight was sitting in an elevated chair that placed her right in front of the burning 3 and 0 candles atop the top purple layer of the cake. 

“Make a wish, Twilight,” Discord said from down below. 

Twilight took a moment to process his words, and get a grip on where she was, then blew out her candles. They went out, but not without the uncontrolled spittle that followed Twilight’s blow. Nopony noticed from down below and cheered anyway. 

Discord snapped his claws and Twilight was back on the ground by the cake  while Discord took the seat she was in just a moment ago, a mic in his lion paw. “Well, Twilight, welcome to the thirties.” His seat began to lower so that he was only a few feet above everyone's heads. “You know, I’ve know Twilight for a little over ten years now, ponies, and let me just say, if you’re ever going to want to see a good mental breakdown…” a large red arrow with flashing lights poofed from a cloud of smoke pointed right at Twilight with an admission sign hanging below, “... she’s  your best bet.” The joke earned him mixed expressions, but he just laughed at his own humor before clearing his throat. “But in all seriousness, Twilight, you’ve been an inspiration to so many, and a life saver to even more, myself included.” A grateful smile crossed Discord’s single-fanged mouth. “She’s just one of the reasons I came to truly believe friendship really is magic, and I’m sure there’s a few of you out there that can say the same.” Among the crowd, Discord saw little gestures and murmurs of agreement. 

Even through the haze in her mind, Twilight still knew when ponies were talking about her. Had she not been drunk, her willpower to stop getting teary-eyed at Discord’s speech may have been stronger, but that wasn’t the case. She quickly wiped her eyes when she saw Discord poof up a glass of champagne and raise it in the air. Ponies that had drink glasses in their hooves or magic raised them up as well. 

“Twilight,” Discord said as he held his glass higher in the air, “you’ve done so much for so many before Thirty. I can’t even begin to imagine what you’re going to do for the next thirty years. You’re an amazing friend to have, and I’ll always be thankful for that second chance that allowed me to find love,” his gaze traveled to a splotch of pink among the crowd, “and the best friends a draconequus could ask for. Happy birthday.”

“Happy birthday!” the whole room rumbled at the volume the crowd cheered. 

Discord threw his head back as he downed the actual glass, leaving the actual champagne floating in a non-existent container before he tossed it aside where it exploded in a blast of confetti. “Now how about a few words from the birthday mare herself?” Discord asked the crowd. He was answered with even louder cheers and a sea of nodding heads.

A different reaction took place from various spots in the room. At the table Flash and Cadance stood at, their eyes widened in horror. “No, no, no, no, no, no, no!” Cadance sputtered at a speed that Pinkie would envy. “What’s he doing? What’s he doing? What’s he doing?!?” 

Discord snapped his claws once again, and the spotlight returned, this time, traveling around the room until it landed on Twilight. 

Flash had a similar frightened look as Cadance, with near equally widened eyes. “We never told Discord,” he breathed in realization. 

“Huh?” Cadance asked. 

“He doesn’t know.” He drove his hooves into his windblown blue mane. “Holy crap, we never told him! He doesn’t know.” Whether it was his protective guard or coltfriend nature, Flash sprung forward, sprinting toward Twilight right before his inner thoughts told him how weird it would look for him to be charging at her. He slowed his pace down and was actually thankful the lights were dimmed very well down. He reached a dazed Twilight in a struggled trot, now sharing the spotlight with her.

“Oooh, is he gonna do it?”

Cadance looked to her side to see multiple Discords spreaded throughout the room, some with foam paws and claws gesturing number one. One of the Discords wore a crazed blonde wig and held a claw drawn… paw drawn… some kind of forelimb drawn banner reading “F + T”.

It took one moment for Flash to realize he was now standing in the spotlight with a room full of ponies who were probably wondering why he suddenly showed up by Twilight’s side during what was supposed to be her moment. 

Silence loomed over the entire room like a storm cloud. Wherever he looked, Flash saw at least one other who knew why a sudden speech was not the best, if not the worst idea for Twilight right now. He charged in without a plan, and now he was by his drunk marefriend without any idea on how to get them out of this. 

“Say words!” one of the Discords called out, unknowingly adding pressure to an already stressed Flash. 

The purple hoof that touched one of his forelimbs usually brought him a sense of relief and ease, and for a second, it did, at least until Flash got a glimpse of the lazy smile and somewhat lost eyes still on Twilight’s face. “I got this,” Twilight said.

Completely unconvinced, Flash tried to counter. “Twilight, I really don’t think—”

She started to limply push him aside, smiling all the while and unsure in her steps. “I got this.”

Flash looked around and got no help from the others about what he should do. They actually looked more confused than he did. He knew leaving her alone right now could end in disaster, but not letting her say anything would just raise questions she’d have to answer. 

“I got this,” Twilight said again, the slur in her words not as noticeable as an hour or so ago.

Uneasily, Flash backed away to give Twilight the full spotlight. He made his way back and stood next to Cadance who looked just as nervous as he felt. “She says she’s got this.” His ability to trust those words sunk even lower when Twilight wobbled slightly as she tried to clear her throat. When she stood straight once again, he noticed she was straining to look focused and not like a deer in the cartlights. 

“A few words, huh?” Twilight started, the slur gone, but for how long? “Well, first, I want to thank everypony for coming, and my friends for putting this whole thing together.” Said friends waved back with strained smiles they were glad nopony else could see. “And, um… I’d like to say thanks to Discord for that great speech.” All of the Discords waved back in one fashion or another, one even yelling out praise for Twilight. “And, um… what else can I say? Except that…” she stopped and put a hoof to her head before she started to sway a little as she stood. “Except that…” Under the spotlight, the smile that crept on her lips was only amplified. 

Cadance had started biting on her hoof. Flash’s wings had stuck to his side as if they were scared to look. The rest of Twilight’s friends and family had done similar actions, each afraid of what the pony under the light was going to say or do next.

Laugh, apparently, was the next thing Twilight did. She broke into a fit of giggles before she threw the hoof on her head in the air. “Except that I’m DRUNK!” 

Gasps sounded off all over the room. In the crowd, Shining Armor and Night Light slapped a hoof to their faces and Twilight Velvet drew hers over her eyes. “Tell me when it’s over,” she said. 

Twilight continued her sporadic giggles, the ruse to look sober, flimsy as it was to begin with, dropped like her inhibitions at the moment. “That’s right everypony. You’re Princess of Friendship is blitzed off her ass! And I don’t care! And do you know why?” She let the silence hold only for a second. “Because I’m not gonna worry about crap today!” she said with a twirl of her body that nearly sent her tumbling to the ground. “Because I worry way too much! And over what? I don’t even remember anymore!” 

The guests varied in their reactions. Some were stock still at seeing royalty behave in such a way, others just stood and waited to see what else a princess could say in a drunken rant, and some barely restrained their laughter and enjoyment at the spectacle in front of them. 

“But that’s fine!” Twilight went on. “Because I am a grown mare! I wanna get drunk, I’m gonna! I wanna make out with my coltfriend in the street, I will!” That one got some looks aimed at a certain stallion who was doing his best to try and make himself invisible. “I wanna dance, I’m gonna dance.” Twilight started doing something with her legs that nopony would dare call dancing. Whatever it was, it made Twilight look like a limp pool noodle about to flop over at any moment. “I… don’t… CARE!” Twilight screamed out as she continued her insult to the art of dance. 

“How bad is it?” Velvet asked her husband. 

“Just keep your eyes closed, honey,” Night Light said. 

“And I’ll say another thing,” Twilight said after coming to a stop in her “dance”. Her horn lit up and a shaky aura of magic surrounded an open champagne bottle from a nearby table. With shaky control, Twilight brought the bottle to her mouth. “My party! I’m Thirty! Not gonna worry! I’ll go crazy if I want to! Don’t care anymore!” Just like that, she downed the bottle like it was nothing. “Woo!” Once the bottle left her mouth, Twilight smashed it against the floor in a clatter of glass.

“Twilight.” Sometime in Twilight’s episode, Flash had made his way to her and got Discord to kill the spotlight. She collapsed into his hooves on the first step she tried to take.

“Heeeeeey, Flashy. How ya been?” 

It was like carrying sacks of potatoes that had been at a New Year’s party. Flash struggled to keep Twilight standing, grunting as he tried to pull her back up. She ended up clambering to her hooves while basically pulling on Flash’s face. 

“Thaaaaaanks, Flash.” Once she was steady, she brought her face to his in a very uncomfortable closeness for the stallion. “I love you so much.” Flash had to fight the urge to retreat from the strong stench of alcohol on Twilight’s breath, especially when she blew a small burp in his face. “Sorry,” she laughed as she swung off his face and clung to his side to keep from falling. She was swinging more than before and couldn’t keep still, and the stench that still lingered, Flash realized had an acidic smell to it. 

“Twilight,” Flash asked, keeping his eyes steady on Twilight and keeping his face a distance from her, “are you okay?” 

“Yeeeaaaah, why?” She let one hoof drop and held onto him with the other, looking at the ground as the floor continued to spin in her vision. A gurgling started up, and Twilight kept wobbling.

“Seriously, Twilight, are you okay?”

“You worry too much, Flash,” she brushed him off as her grip tightened slightly. “But, hey, if I were to puke on you, what side would suck less?” 

Caught off guard by that, Flash just stood and kept Twilight hoisted up. “What?”  He never got  an answer. 

First, he saw her turn with a speed he never knew was possible. Next, he heard the nauseating retching that even made him feel sick. Finally, he felt, and smelt, the mostly liquid and partly chunky remains of whatever was in Twilight’s stomach spew all over his shoulder and the floor in a horrendous *SPLAT. He didn’t want to look. If he did, he knew he’d have something similar spew out of him as well.

All over the room, ponies held their breaths after a collective gasp. A deep cutting silence surrounded the room. Twilight Velvet dared to move her hoof away from her eyes, but Night Light gently kept them in place. 

Once the first wave was done, Twilight staggered back up to somewhat meet eyes with her coltfriend. “You’re so good to me, you know that?” And then she went for the same side of him again as the retching started up again. 

*BLLLLEEEECCCCHHHH!


***



Present Day



***


Some of them kept silent, some of them tried to show some restraint in their enjoyment of the story, and other were merciless. Spike, Rainbow Dash, and Scootaloo fell under the latter as they were on the floor howling away in their recount of Twilight’s birthday. 

Twilight sat on her haunches, trying to keep her face straight and neutral. Underneath the facade, rage burned like a blitz of flames ready to engulf worlds. 

“Ah, c’mon, Twi,” Spike said through struggled breaths of air, “it’s funny!”

“Yeah, Twilight,” Dash started to say once the ache in her side subdued. “For how hammered you were, I’m surprised that was all that happened.” 

Twilight let a bit of her rage out in a long and aggravated groan. “UGGGHHH!” It wasn’t like she was one to not find humor when looking at things in hindsight, but that day and night in particular was not exactly in her top ten days she wanted to remember list. She should know, she added and dropped quite a few days on that list within the years.

Of the ponies that actually contained themselves, Rarity stepped toward Twilight and rested a hoof on her shoulder. “Come now, Twilight. It may not have been your… proudest moment…” Despite her word choice, Rarity still saw the daggers in Twilight’s eyes. “... but it wasn’t a complete disaster. You did get something quite lovely the morning after.” 

And just like the puke that was washed off of her coat and feathers the morning after that particular birthday, Twilight’s anger flowed out of her as a true and reminiscent smile began to grace her features.


***



The Morning After Twilight's Party
	


***


When the first crack of sunlight innocently peaked through the heavily drawn curtains of Twilight’s bedroom, it unknowingly triggered a series of pain to set off in the princess’s head. At that first crack of light, Twilight’s eyes cracked open only to shut back closed. First, there was the little burning in her eyes from the new light against previously covered eyes, then came what was like a nail being driven into her head then slammed with a mallet.

Twilight groaned in neat agony as she grasped her head with both hooves and clenched her eyes even tighter, doing nothing to alleviate the storm in her head. 

A flower pot to the head. An anvil to the head. A loaded cart to the head. A piano to the head. Right now, she’d rather have that and more land on her head and it be over with, than what she was going through now. Every little movement, every little sound, even the rustling of her covers sent a new wave of knives jabbing at her skull. She wanted to just throw the covers over her head to block the sunlight, but that required movement and more noise from the covers. If she didn’t, then the sunlight still pelting her face would continue its assault on her, mercilessly adding to the ever growing pain in her head.

“Aaannnnnnnnngh!” Just groaning brought pain, but it was all she wanted to do. As if Equestria itself was planning her demise in just the span of her first few moments awake, the door had to open with its squeaking hinges.

Multiple voices saying “Hey, Twilight,” all reached her ears, and she recognized them as her friends, but she also realized that  just hearing their voices was like interference in a mic blasting through speakers. 

She groaned again. “Nnnnngh, guys, not so loud.”

Everypony saw she had her head in her hooves and the covers halfway between covering her and thrown aside. They each whispered their apologies, ultimately just causing Twilight more pain. In an unspoken agreement, they sent Fluttershy to the front of the group. 

“Oh, goodness. Are you okay Twilight?” Fluttershy asked in a gentle whisper Twilight could actually listen to without feeling like her head was about to splice open. 

“Nnngh, I don’t know,” Twilight answered. Talking made her notice the unbearable dryness in her mouth. She smacked her lips together, trying to salivate, only to get a taste of something acidic. “Why does my mouth taste like vomit?” 

“You don’t remember?”

“Remember what?”

Even hungover, Twilight still managed to see the nervous reaction Fluttershy had; the glint in her eyes, the step she took back, and the apologetic curve of her lips. She also noticed Fluttershy wasn’t looking at her, but off to the other side of the bed. Twilight turned to see nothing there, until she looked further down at the bed. Ignoring the sunlight piercing her eyes and stinging her head, she saw a chair seated by the end of her rather large bed. Sitting in the chair, asleep, Flash Sentry was snoozing in an uncomfortable looking position. She also got to see his jacket, half of it hanging on the edge of a trashcan. Even from where she sat, she could smell the awful odor from the trashcan, and it smelled just like her mouth tasted. With some new anxiety and fear, Twilight returned her look on Fluttershy. “Fluttershy, what happened yesterday?”

After a little hesitation, Fluttershy asked, “You don’t remember anything?”

Instead of just holding her head, Twilight began to rub her temples, trying to concentrate despite the thick haze in her memory. With a little more though, the haze got lighter. “I remember… ugh, it was my birthday, I remember a party, and something about a hole.” She got that far on her list before her head began to throb again. 

“That’s all you remember?”

“Yeah, why?” Twilight saw the looks her friends gave one another, as if debating whether or not they should say anything. Of course, her being her, Twilight wasn’t going to be left without answers. “Guys, what else happened?” 

Fluttershy looked back at the others before making a light trot back to them. Twilight heard them whispering various arguments. 

“You tell her.”

“I can’t.”

“She’s gotta find out some time.”

“You do it.”

“I’m not doing it.” 

“Guys!” Twilight said over their whispers. “Sitting right here! Ow!” She grabbed her head and winced. By far, this was the worst hangover yet. 

She heard a loud sigh and claws scrap against the carpet. Spike had stepped forward. “Uh, Twi,” he said with a claw grabbing the back of his neck. “Do you at least remember what happened before the party?”

Her fuzzy memories came slowly, but they still came. “I went out with you, Rarity, Mom, Dad, Shining… aaaaaand…” the memory started to reshape itself; disguises, neon, a unicorn stallion, and, “... Cadance!” Most of it came flooding back; her freakout in town, the emergency teleport, and the bar Cadance took her too. All of it was a little too much on her already aching head. “I remember her taking me to this bar… but I only had one or two drinks.” It was her belief at least, but the questioning looks from her friends made her start to doubt that possibility. Which would explain why everything after the trip to the bar was one big blur. 

“Suuuuuure, and Cadance told me it was just to get you to relax a little.” 

“Yeah?”

Tell her now and get it over with. It was old advice Spike tended to stick by when dealing with Twilight. Sometimes there was just no room for sugarcoating. “Well, it began like that, and then middle, middle, middle, and then you showed up drunk to your surprise party, went on a rant, puked on Flash, and then passed out on the floor, the end.”

Twilight’s eyes stayed wide open for nopony knew how long. It was as if her body completely shut down right then and there while her mind raced. In her head, the events of the past night came at her like a sledge hammer. The pain in her head went ignored as images flashed in Twilight’s head; the rant, the wobbling, the retching, oh, sweet Celestia and Luna, the retching, and worst of all, who she did it on.

“No,” Twilight groaned before she slumped on her bed. She picked her head up off the pillow and slammed it back onto the fluffy surface, wishing it were a wall instead as she kept banging her head into the pillow. “No, no, no, no, no! Why? Why? Why?” 

Unsure whether to intervene or not, the others just stood back and let Twilight vent into the pillows. After a minute or so of awkward standing, Twilight finally finished her moment and just sunk into her bed. Her head was turned away from her friends and towards the last bit of darkness the curtains casted. If she let her eyes wander, she could just make out Flash still knocked out on the chair, and a small little box on the ledge of the large glass window.  

It hit her like a jolt, the sight of the little box. Even hungover, she could fill in the spaces as to what that little box was and what it was supposed to be used for, and she hated that out of all the times to not be analytical about things, being hungover still wasn’t one of those times for her. 

“Guys, what’s that by the window?” Call it desperation, but Twilight clung to the tiny shred of hope that she didn’t just ruin the combined seventh attempt last night. That that little box taunting her at the window wasn’t what should have been on her horn or on her wings six tries ago and that she didn’t ruin whatever Flash was trying to plan for her… again. Her friends’ silence was all the answer she needed to know that the little box was what it was, and that everything it meant had been ruined by her.

Twilight found herself in the pillows once again, moaning out her despair. “Uggggh, why? Ahhh, my head! Uggggghn!” A few moments more, Twilight was left head-first in her pillows. 

“Twilight?” Rarity said, stepping forward. “It really wasn’t that bad.” She was lying, she knew, but at this point, she was willing to try anything to lift her friend’s spirit up. She got no response, just an eyeful of a mare festering in her own frustration and pity. “Twilight?”

One by one, the rest of the group called her name, each getting no response from her. It wasn’t until she felt a little guilt for shutting her friends out that Twilight finally crawled up from her bed and looked at each of her friends in the eye. “Guys,” she said after a sigh and a little moan, “thanks for checking up on me, really. It means a lot, but right now, I just really want to be alone. At least until my head finally stops feeling like its trying to crawl out of my skull.” 

Spike and the rest of the girls looked at each other briefly before they gave small smiles to Twilight. “Okay, Twi,” Spike said as he, along with the others, started towards the door. “We’ll be back in about an hour to see how you’re doin’. Just take some aspirin and get some rest, okay?”

Her face back in the pillow, Twilight weakly waved her hoof and groaned what sounded like “okay”. Spike made sure to close the door as quietly as he could when he and the others were out the door. Twilight heard the click of the door, and that was the last sound she heard before she was left in a room of silence, save for the quiet snores from the stallion in the chair. 

Sleep the day off. It was the only plan Twilight had at the moment. Sleep the aftereffects of everything from the previous night, try to forget about it later on, and just get on with life and hope that the eighth time will be the charm. She would later curse herself for thinking about the latter. 

While sleep was the only thing she craved, it was as far out of reach as the relief for her hangover seemed  even after taking some aspirin. Incapable of succumbing to sleep, Twilight spent the next few minutes tossing and turning in her bed. When that did nothing but wake her even more, she took to staring at the ceiling and walls. If anything, seeing no movement whatsoever relieved some of the throbbing in her head, but even she grew tired of just staring. She sat up and just let her eyes roam around, until they landed on that little box in by the window. 

Her eyes narrowed. That stupid little box, and everything it meant and brought on her and Flash. All the effort gone to waste, all the trouble it caused, and all the planning and time wasted for just one gesture the two of them already knew would lead to. She kept staring daggers into it. “You,” she said venomously. Her getting drunk, passing out, puking on Flash, all of it stemmed from her worries that dealt with that little box and what it kept cheating her and Flash out of. If the box was animate, she knew it would be laughing at her, taunting and beckoning her to see what would happen on try number eight. 

“Not again.” Twilight stepped out of bed, all haziness gone and replaced with a sudden drive. She came to the ledge of the window Flash was by, making sure to make her hoofsteps loud, and swiped the box of the ledge. She was going to get the last laugh… word… whatever it is the box, she resolved, would not have against her. She turned to Flash and gave him a light shake. “Flash.”

He stirred, but grudgingly. His eyes opened and closed multiple times before he gave a big yawn. “Do I need to get another bucket?”

Deciding not to delve into what he meant by that, even though she had an idea, Twilight just called his name again. Once he wiped the grogginess out of his eyes, Flash saw Twilight at his level and the open box with the ring inside. He questioned if this was a dream or not, but the smell of last night’s incident told him he wasn’t. 

“Marry me.” Flash looked at her like she just went crazy… crazier. “No plans, no romance, no special day to bring it up, no extravagance.” As her list went on, Flash could hear the annoyance in her voice and knew she was thinking about the same disasters that occurred with said romance and extravagance. She was looking at him dead in the eyes. “We have tried. Celestia and Luna knows we tried! It’s not funny anymore, so please, with my mane gone wild, head pounding, completely hungover… just bucking marry me.”

Flash wasn’t gonna lie, as it happened this way, there was a lot less stress, but moreover, he was actually kind of happy, and it showed on his face. He extended a wing out, and that got a smile out of Twilight. She easily slipped it on like a band before that wing engulfed her in an embrace. “We really should’ve done it like this five tries ago,” Flash said, not even bothering to contain his laugh. 

Now Twilight was beaming. She pounced on him, taking him right off his chair and onto the floor where she smacked her lips right onto her new fiance. Flash immediately returned the kiss, admittingly tasting the vomit from last night, but for Twilight’s sake, didn’t bring it up. 

For Twilight, it was like a huge weight was finally listed off her and tossed off a cliff. No more plans, no more possibilities of screwing up something like that again, and no more stress. To go from how she felt just a few minutes ago to this, it was otherworldly for her. It was something that couldn’t be described. She nearly forgot she was still hungover, but her body didn’t. All the motion she just did, the sounds it made, the banging in her head, it all came back full force along with something else. 

Gurgling sounded when Flash and Twilight parted lips. Flash looked up to see Twilight’s face contort. “Twilight? Are you—” That was as far as he got before she lurched forward, her eyes wide, mouth open, and the retching started up again. 

*BLLLLEEEECCCCHHHH!


***



Present Day



***


Back in Sugarcube Corner, everyone was all smiles after the… unique tale of how Twilight finally managed to end up with her special somepony. The band under some of her feathers was a constant reminder of the long, awkward, and humiliating road that in the end was completely worth it. 

“I think yours takes the weirdest birthday award, Twilight,” Scootaloo said, cutting the moment short.

Twilight turned to the orange pegasus with a cocked eyebrow. “What about Pinkie’s?”

Everypony’s eyes went to said pink mare who busied herself at the dessert table. “Hmmm?” she asked with a beard of frosting when she saw their looks. 

Spike was the first to break the topic. “Do you remember your birthday, Pinkie?”

“Uh, duh!” Pinkie finished licking her frosting beard off her face before rejoining the group. “It was on a Tuesday 36 years ago. My Mom was on the bed and my Dad and sisters held her hooves as the doctor kept telling her to push. A few hours later I—”

“Wrong birthday, Pinkie,” Spike said with a slap to his face. “I meant your thirtieth.” 

“Oh! Well that’s a completely different story. We were all back in Ponyville…”