I Have No Mouth and I Must Squee

by BaroqueNexus

First published

Fluttershy wakes up without her mouth. Who took her mouth?

One day Fluttershy wakes up to find that her mouth is missing. Together, she and her friends must discover the culprit who stole her mouth.

Fun Fact: I wrote all of this on my phone, so please excuse its brevity.

Story

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It was a beautiful morning in Equestria, and when Fluttershy woke up and felt the warm rays of the sun on her face, she sighed...or tried to. When she tried to open her mouth it felt as though it had been sealed by peanut butter. Did somepony wrap her mouth in duct tape? She struggled to speak, reaching up and feeling her lips...but she felt nothing. Terrified, she ran to her bathroom and looked in the mirror.

To her horror, she discovered that her mouth was completely gone. She would have screamed, except she couldn't.

Panicking, she raced down the stairs and burst out of her house, heading for town. She desperately searched for the only ponies who could help her in a situation like this: her friends.

Fluttershy ran all over the town, searching. Several ponies said hello as she sped past, but she paid them no heed. She searched high and low, looking everywhere from town hall to Sugarcube Corner. When she still couldn't find them, she shivered and decided to fly high above the town and look down, but she realized that she could not make it anypony's face. Just when she had given up hope, something crashed into her and knocked her out of the sky.

Fluttershy tumbled to earth, landing in a mud puddle. The pony that had collided with her emerged from the alley next to the puddle, a dazed look on her familiar cyan face.

"Ow. Sorry about that, buddy," Rainbow Dash said, trying to shake off the dizziness. "I guess I was...wait, Fluttershy? Oh jeez, I'm sorry! Are you okay? Here, just give me a second..."

Rainbow Dash sped off, leaving Fluttershy to wallow in the mud. Tears began to form in her eyes, but she could not sob. She got up just as Dash returned with a dark gray rain cloud.

"Here, just stand still, Fluttershy," she said, flying onto the top of the cloud. "I did the same thing for Twilight when she first came here. Gimme one second..."

Suddenly a downpour fell from the cloud, soaking the poor pegasus to the bone. After a few seconds, all of the mud had been washed away from her body, but she was still soaking wet. She shivered and nearly fell back into the mud pit, but then Rainbow Dash picked her up and took off into the air.

Fluttershy hung on for dear life as Rainbow Dash circled the town at breakneck speed. This lasted about half a minute, and right when she was certain that she could hold on no longer, Rainbow Dash gently took her back to the ground. She was scared out of her wits, but at least she was completely dry.

"There you go, Fluttershy," Rainbow Dash said, dusting herself off and smiling proudly. "Once again, Dash is here to save the..."

Then she finally noticed. "What the...Fluttershy, you...you don't have a mouth!"

Fluttershy stamped her hoof and gave a muffled moan, tears welling up in her eyes again.

"But...what happened?" Rainbow Dash asked, absolutely dumbfounded. "Why...what?!"

The tears finally streamed down her face. Dash frowned and held her soothingly.

"Hey, hey, it'll be all right, sweetie. If anyone can help you out, it's Twilight. C'mon."

And so they went.

"Hmm. Most interesting."

Twilight was examining Fluttershy in her tree house as the rest of the girls were circled around them with worried looks on their faces.

"Do you remember anything that happened last night, Fluttershy? Anything at all?"

She nodded. A quill and paper had been laid out on a desk in front of them. Fluttershy took the quill, dipped it in the ink bottle, and began to write.

Went home, fed Angel, went to bed.

Twilight frowned. "That's it?"

Fluttershy nodded. Applejack huffed and scratched her head. "Well, that just doesn't make any sense. Had to be some kinda magic spell that somepony put on her."

"Yeah, she's right!" Pinkie Pie chimed in. "Remember when that unicorn Trixie took my mouth? Oh, that was no fun at all..."

"It could very well be some young ruffian that was pulling a sophomoric prank," Rarity said.

Twilight frowned. "But who want to do that to Fluttershy? Why would somepony do this to her?"

"Whoever they are, they're gonna regret messing with my friends!" Rainbow Dash declared. Twilight put up a hoof.

"No, Rainbow. Revenge isn't the answer. We just need to find whoever did this and get this whole thing sorted out. But we have no clues...except..."

Suddenly her eyes widened. She ran past everypony and called out.

"Spike! Wake up and get down here!"

A faint groan came from above, and with an annoyed huff Twilight cast her magic up at the second floor. There was a cry of surprise, and Spike the baby dragon came hurtling down, suspended in the air.

"Aghh! Stop it, Twilight!"

She obliged, dropping him on his purple scaled butt. He muttered something under his breath and looked at her crossly.

"All right, what is so important that you had to wake me up from my nap? I need my sleep, you know."

"First off, you sleep all the time. Secondly, that is why I woke you up."

She pointed to Fluttershy, and when Spike looked at her his narrowed eyes shot up and his jaw fell. "Oh, um...er..."

"Now can you please find me that copy of Professor Twigbert's Book of Spells & Magical Mysteries?"

"Oh...oh yeah. Sure." Spike could not seem to take his eyes off of Fluttershy, who looked like she wanted to curl up in a ball and hide. The dragon hurried over to the bookcase and went through several scrolls and tomes, scattering them across the floor. Finally he pulled out a big gray book with strange symbols on the front.

"Here you go," he said, handing the book to Twilight.

"Thank you. Now, let's see here..." She opened the book and flipped through the pages. "There has to be...ah! Here we go! 'A re-imagicka spell will bring out the traces of a spell already cast, in order to determine what spell was cast and who cast it.' And...hm. Doesn't look too hard."

She put the book down and concentrated. The other girls stepped out of her way. As her face tightened and she lowered her head, a spark of green magic burst from her horn, followed by a steady stream of emerald energy that wrapped around Fluttershy, who could only watch in fascinated terror. The magic circled her once, twice, and then hummed loudly. The room darkened, and just when it looked like the thing was about to explode, it dissipated.

Silence for a moment, and then...

"What the heck was that all about, Twilight?" Rainbow Dash asked incredulously.

"It was the re-imagicka spell. It showed me what spell was cast on Fluttershy."

"And?" Rarity said. Twilight sighed.

"It's not unicorn magic."

Everypony gasped. "Whatcha mean it ain't unicorn magic?"

"I mean that it didn't come from a unicorn's horn. It came from something else."

"But what else could do magic like that?" Pinkie Pie wondered aloud.

Twilight's brow furrowed. "I don't know. Maybe something Fluttershy came into contact with." She turned to Fluttershy. "So all you did last night was feed Angel?"

She nodded.

"Then I don't see what else we can do but find Angel. Where is he, Fluttershy?"

She shrugged. Twilight put her hoof on her face and groaned.

"We've go to find him!"

"Why?" Rainbow Dash asked, floating over them. "What would a bunny rabbit have to do with this?"

"It only makes sense to pursue every possibility," Twilight replied. "If feeding Angel was the only thing she did last night, then we have to find him!"

Rainbow Dash frowned, trying to make sense of her logic. "Okay, I guess. Let's go find ourselves a rabbit."

They converged on Fluttershy's house, but Rainbow Dash was still unconvinced about the Angel dilemma.

"Why would a bunny rabbit have magic? Why are we going after him? We should write a letter to Princess Celestia, or..."

"Dash, if this doesn't work, then I will write a letter to the Princess. I just want to make sure. Maybe Angel saw something or somepony in the night."

Dash huffed and continued to hover alongside them as they approached the house. Twilight turned to Fluttershy.

"So you don't know where Angel is?"

She shook her head, and Twilight sighed. "Well, we've got to find him. Let's spread out."

They fanned out, calling Angel's name. It went on like that for about twenty minutes, and when they reconvened they had all found nothing. Now Applejack had joined Rainbow Dash in frustration.

"This is ridiculous. Here we are gettin' our knickers in a twist by tryin' t'find some darned rabbit that probably has nothin' to do with any o' this!"

Twilight hung her head. "You're probably right. I'll start writing the letter to the Princess and..."

"Wait! Rabbit at twelve o'clock!" Rainbow Dash called out. They whirled around and sure enough, Angel was hopping away from them.

"After him!" Twilight shouted. They galloped toward him, and though he was trying to run away, he could not outrun six fully grown ponies. Applejack jumped on the critter and held him down firmly but gently.

"Hold on there, little fella! Take it easy!"

Angel struggled in protest, but there was no escaping Applejack's hoof. The others gathered around him, and Twilight began to speak.

"All right, Angel. You're going to answer our questions. What happened to Fluttershy's mouth?"

At that moment a few of them were thinking of how ridiculous it was that they were interrogating a rabbit. But Twilight did not look the least bit amused.

"Answer us! Nod or shake your head!"

Angel struggled and struggled, but he could not escape. After a few minutes, he sighed.

"Fine. You got me."

Everypony gasped, and Applejack nearly fell back, releasing Angel. But the rabbit did not run. He just sat there pouting.

Twilight looked taken aback. "Angel, you...you can talk?"

He stared up at her like she had just asked if the moon was made of cheese. "Oh come now, Twilight, I thought you would have figured it out by now. I always knew you were a smart girl, and so I guess it wasn't luck that brought you too me."

Rarity's eyes widened. "Wait a moment. I know that voice..."

"Yeah, me too," Rainbow Dash said. "But who..."

Twilight cocked her head, staring into Angel's little black eyes. "What are you?"

Angel chuckled. "You still don't know? Very well, I suppose I've had my fun. My little facade is over. Now, if you could all kindly step back..."

Suddenly there was a flash of light and a puff of smoke. Everypony fell to the ground. When the haze finally cleared, Twilight looked up and saw what was standing in Angel's place, and suddenly she knew everything.

"Discord."

The draconequus laughed. "Yes, I suppose so. You girls have grown accustomed to my little schemes. You're becoming as clever as me, I must say."

"So you took Fluttershy's mouth?" Rainbow Dash growled. "Why? Why would you do that to her? After everything she did for you?"

Discord frowned. "Oh come now, Rainbow Dash. I was just having a little bit of fun."

"Losin' yer mouth ain't exactly mah idea o' fun," Applejack quipped.

"Well, I suppose to each his own. Or her own, I suppose," said Discord. "Not to worry. Just the snap of my fingers, and..."

He snapped, and there was a puff of smoke. When it cleared, everypony saw that Fluttershy's mouth had returned. She gasped, and then smiled. Twilight turned back to Discord.

"That wasn't funny, that was just mean. Why are you here, anyway?"

Discord twirled his beard and smiled. "My day off."

"And you thought you'd spend it terrorizing Fluttershy?" Rarity asked incredulously.

Discord's smile slowly faded from his face, and he sighed. "Yes, unfortunately. You'll have to forgive me, for I suppose my brand of humor is far different than yours. Chaos is in my nature, you know. I'm not one to just sit around doing nothing."

"So get a hobby," Twilight said, staring up at him. "Do something other than playing pranks on everypony."

"But...But it was funny! None of you laughed?"

"NO!" they all shouted, and Discord put up his hands. "All right, all right! Jeez."

Finally Fluttershy spoke. "Where is Angel?"

Discord looked at her, his face neutral. "Inside your house. He's been sleeping all day."

"You didn't harm a hair on him?"

"Not an itty-bitty hair."

Fluttershy smiled. "Then I forgive you."

Everypony looked at her like she had two heads. "What?!" Twilight exclaimed. "Fluttershy, he..."

"It's okay, Twilight," she replied, still smiling. "Discord might have done the wrong thing, but that doesn't mean we shouldn't forgive him."

Discord smiled. "Spoken like a true angel," he said.

"Well, I still think he should apologize," Rainbow Dash said. Discord looked at her and sighed.

"You're right." He stared at Fluttershy. "I am very, very sorry for having frightened you and caused you stress. Will you forgive..."

"Of course," she said before he could finish his sentence. "It's okay. I forgive you."

Twilight still couldn't believe that she was so accepting, but she sighed and said "All right. At least it's over. But no more jokes, okay?"

Discord chuckled. "Oh, telling me to not play practical jokes is like telling a dragon not the breathe fire. It's in my nature! But for Fluttershy's sake, I won't bother any of you again. I must get back to Canterlot anyway."

With that, he said his goodbyes and sped off. Everypony remained quiet for a moment, their eyes wide and jaws agape.

"Well, at least it's over," Fluttershy said. She walked back to her house, leaving her friends to stare at each other. Then they started to giggle, then chuckle, then downright guffaw.

"Oh my, that was ridiculous," Applejack said, laughing. "Ah know ah shouldn't be laughin', but..."

"So preposterous," Rarity agreed. "So preposterous that it's funny."

Pinkie Pie sniggered. "That was kinda fun."

The laughter slowly died, and they all looked at each other awkwardly. Finally they all went their separate ways, saying goodbye to one another and going about their lives as if nothing had happened.