> Her Void Pink
>  by Darkryt Orbinautz
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

> Cupcake Theorem
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ponyville, Equestria. A large, country town where everypony knew everypony in spite of its size. No doubt at least partially through the efforts of a one Pinkimenia Diane Pie. Recently it became home to Twilight Sparkle, who despite being for all intents and purposes, a noblepony, thoroughly enjoyed the town's country air. It was humble and modest. Not arrogant or haughty like her former home.

At the moment, it was nearly silent. every business, shop, and store having closed up for the night so their underpaid, overworked employees could get some sleep.

There was one store, however, that retained just the smallest sliver of light. The scent of pastries lingered within, despite the oven's last use having been hours ago.

Within the building's second floor, three occupants sat down on the upper part of the house. Twilight Sparkle, Spike, and Pinkie. Spike was something of an odd one out amongst them, being a baby dragon.

"That really was a great party, Pinkie." Spike complimented.

"Thanks!" The poofy-maned pony answered. Her hair bounced as she talked. "You should come over tomorrow! I'm gonna throw one that's even bigger and better!"

Spike chuckled. "Well, if anypony can top Pinkie, it's Pinkie, right Twilight?"

"Hmm?" Twilight responded, seemingly disinterested in the conversation. "Oh...yeah, sure."

"Oh, come on, Twilight!" Spike whined. "You've been distracted since the rest of our friends left!"

"Just...thinking about stuff." Twilight told him. This much was true. She had been thinking silently since the rest of their group had left, and only Spike's directs efforts to engage her in conversation had broken her from her mind. What could she have been thinking about that would cause her not to care so much as to not even talk?

She had been thinking Pinkie Pie...was very pink.

Pinkie, normally energetic and bouncing everywhence way, let out a yawn. "Awwwwnn...okay guys, you can go now. I can't stay up much longer." Had she been in a better mood for biting remarks, Twilight might've chided her eating too much sugar, causing a crash.

"Okay, Pinks. See ya later!" Spike got up, entirely willing to comply with her wishes. Twilight lingered behind.

"Twilight, aren't you gonna go home with Spike?" Pinkie asked.

"Hmm?...Yes, I...I just want to see something, first." Twilight responded. She got up herself and walked over to the room's light switch and hit it with her hoof. The light faded from the room in a blink of an eye, leaving it in darkness except for the one area where the moonlight was beaming through the window. "Could you stand there real quick, Pinkie?"

Pinkie was baffled by Twilight's request, but did so, stepping into the room's only illuminated spot.

She looked beautiful. The light of the moon reflected off her coat and made her look silver. Pink silver. Silvery pink. Whatever it was, it was glowing and gorgeous. Twilight longed for Pinkie to let her stop this moment in time for eternity to preserve Pinkie's beauty in the moment...

N-n-not to say she didn't look beautiful at other times! That wasn't what Twilight meant at all! That pink coat looked gorgeous at any time of day.

"Gorgeous..." Twilight muttered.

"What was that?"

"Nothing...thank you." Twilight said quietly. Pinkie starting walking out and towards her own bedroom while Twilight stood there, thinking over the results of her experience.

This had been going on for several days now. Twilight Sparkle started thinking about...about her. About that color. About that pink coat. Once she started thinking about it, it took some effort to get her to stop. She tried to get different lightnings on Pinkie to see how it would look then, but up until now, every one she tried only detracted from the radiance of the pink.

That wasn't the only thing separating this time from the others, though. All the other times, Twilight had managed to mask it completely under a facade of normalcy. A group photo-op with all her friends. A strobe light party. Up til now, she had successfully hidden it from everypony. Not of them might've even suspected that through the librarian's head, obsessive-compulsive thoughts about pink were racing at half the speed of sound (or 170.145 M/S). What would her friends think if they had known? That she was crazy? That she was a danger to herself? Or...quite possibly, that she was in love?

Realizing she was still inside Pinkie's house, Twilight resolved to get out before morning or else she'd look like a stalker.




Twilight Sparkle had no uneasiness traveling through Ponyville this late at night. Some ponies might've been afraid of robbers or gang members. Twilight didn't fear these things; she feared getting back a grade from her mentor Celestia. Nothing was more terrifying than that, no matter how hard those unscrupulous ponies tried to convince her otherwise.

But there were some other things she was afraid of as well. What would her friends think if they knew what was going through her head? They would abandon her, wouldn't they? Wouldn't they?

No, no, they wouldn't do that. They'd try to get her help. Therapeutic help. She didn't need that kind of help, she needed more of something in her life. But more what? More friends? Were five friends not enough? No, no, that couldn't be it. More assignments to Celestia? Her work plate was rather clear at the moment...Twilight shook her head. That wasn't what she needed either.

She needed...she needed...

She needed more pink. Yes...that was it. More pink. Not enough pink. Never enough pink.

She's not crazy! She just needs more pink, is all. She's not crazy.

She's not crazy.

Her home, a library inside a tree house, began to flicker into view. She nodded her head at this and slowed her pace at the fact she was that close to home, not that she was going that fast in the first place.

She entered through the door, and, after a quick stop to the bathroom to brush her teeth (don't forget to floss!) she went to her bedroom, where Spike was curled up in his basket, already sound asleep.

A window was open. Most ponies would be concerned a burglar might have climbed in, but she seemed calm. Almost approving of it. Why would she have approved of an open window?

The answer slid its way out of the night sky and through the window into her room. A small owl rested itself on the perch that she had bought for it.

"Hoo," Owlowiscious hooted.

Twilight said hello to him, giving him a cracker and a pat on the head. She looked back at the basket to make sure Spike was still asleep before turning back to Owlowiscious. "Owlowiscious , can I tell you something?"

"Hoo."

With his vague response, Twilight decided it was okay to let her secret come spilling out.

"I've been thinking weirdly as of late. I can't stop about...about the color pink. I keep trying to make Pinkie Pie's coat look different in the light and every time I get it to change color, I want it to change back. I want it to stay pink. Sounds silly, huh?"

"Hoo."

"Yeah . . . I guess you're right . . . whatever it is you said."

Owlowiscious looked at her, then pointed his wing at the window. He was asking if it was okay for him to take into the night again.

Twilight nodded. "Sure." Then she added sternly, "But be back on the perch before I wake up, or I'll worry."

The owl accepted her request, then flapped his wings til he was off his perch and flew back into the shadows from whence he had come.

Twilight crawled under the covers of her bed and blinked her eyes slowly, waiting for the grip of sleep to grab her completely. It caught her soon enough, for she started dreaming not too long afterwards.

In her dream, she was sitting down on...nothing. Everything was pitch-black, wherever she was. There was a light in the distance: a candle atop a table, decorated for a romantic dinner for two. Two wooden chairs were by it, one of which had her friend Rainbow Dash sitting in it, waiting for Twilight to join her at the table. Most ponies seeing one of their friends set up for a romantic dinner so casually in a black void might have been kinda scared. But not Twilight.

Twilight had been here before. Several times. This was her void, Her dream world, where she would try to conjure up something to fulfill her need for pink. Her friends, her mentor, her assistant. Even the dreaded Nightmare Moon of myth; at some point, she had tried experimenting, making some weirdo chimera of those ponies. It was simple at first; just the mixing of coat and mane colors. Nightmare Moon in Celestia's colors. Rainbow Dash in Fluttershy's. There was always something about them though, that was just missing. Her dream-thing always mimicked what she want it to look like, always. Except for one thing. One, single...very important thing. It could turn into anypony she knew, into any color she'd seen, into any creature she'd studied.

Except for one thing.

It couldn't turn pink.

It would try, though. Oh, how very hard it would try! It would try so very hard to turn pink. It would start grunting and groaning with effort and pain. More than once, it had gotten to the point where Twilight had to throw her hooves on its shoulders and try to get it to stop before it hurt itself. Most nights, her dream would end there.

Other nights, though, she never encountered the dream-thing at all. She would be alone, until she heard music being played. She would start galloping frantically, trying to find its source, hoping that somehow her void had finally learned the secret to summoning that bright color that she so desperately craved. Alas, when she had reached the music point of origin, it was a famous Earth pony cellist known as Octavia. Then, she would hear different music and search for it, only to find a white unicorn DJ. Then, it would happen one more time where instead of that beautiful color, she would find Fluttershy's bird chorus. It was at this point that she caught wise, realizing she wasn't going to find that thing she needed.

Always, just as she caught on...just as she knew she wasn't going to find her or her strange polka tunes in this dream, just as Twilight wasn't certain that there would be no pink in her dream...that she would hear a siren song that could only have been pink in nature...and she would break down into tears, knowing that no matter how far she looked, she wouldn't be able to trace the hypnotic tones back to their maker.

It was kinda silly, really. She was dreaming that Pinkie was playing a melody meant to trap her in a spell...when Pinkie already had her utterly enthralled.

Waking up from this particular night's dream, Twilight peeked her eye over to see Spike still sleeping. As her assistant, it was his responsibility to be up before and prepare breakfast. As Spike however, he had no chance of ever being up before Twilight's workaholic mentality. She knew how much he valued being her number-one assistant thought, so she just lied in bed reading a book, then pretend to have fallen asleep when he himself woke up. This morning, however, she found herself tumbling and turning in bed, awake, but wanting to go back to her dream void. Thinking maybe if she worked really hard, she could figure out how to put that lively color inside of it.

The scent of cooking wriggled their way up the stairs into the bedroom. Eggs, cracked on the side of the skilled, their yolks oozed out onto the pan. White batter, scooped into balls of glop and laid out delicately on the same. Pancakes and Eggs. How nice of Spike to make those particular items.

With the sound of her book rustling and Owlowiscious snoring being the only other noise in the room, Twilight heard the pitter-patter of Spike's footsteps start on the stairs. Her very own alarm for when she needed to toss her book aside and bury herself under the covers.

Twilight wormed her leg out and dropped the book on the floor next to the bed. Tossing into a corner of the room would have been too attention grabbing, too noisy. Spike would've known something was up if she did that, but a book lying on the side of the floor was inconspicuous, as everypony would be expecting her to do something like fall asleep while reading a book and drop it.

"Twilight!" Spike cried, running up the last of the stairs and over to Twilight's bed. "Wake up! Breakfast is ready!"

"Five more minutes, Spike." Twilight complained. Not that she wanted five more minutes. She had had plenty of time to sleep more if she wanted to. She was just keeping up the facade of Spike being up before her.

"Oooh, Twilight! You're always saying how important it is to be up early!" Spike whined.

"Uhhn, fine." Twilight groaned, tossing the sheets off herself and shakily getting off the bed. Spike happily took her hoof and started dragging her down the library's stairs until they were in the kitchen. Spike was willing to let go of it once they got there and let Twilight seat herself. The pancakes and eggs were placed in a very appealing fashion on plates on the table.

Twilight blandly levitated the fork set aside for her into the air and started stabbing at the flaky food. With a bite speared on it, she stopped short of actually putting it in her mouth.

"Twilight?" Spike asked with concern. "Are you okay?"

"You could've made the pancakes pink."

"...What?"

Twilight blinked her eyes, trying to wrap her head around what just happened. "What what, Spike?"

"You said I could've made the pancakes pink?"

Twilight's eyes widened. She didn't remember saying that to Spike. She must have...lapsed or something...Oh, Celestia! Asking Pinkie to stand in the light from the window...telling Spike something she couldn't remember telling him...she must have been losing her control! Spike or somepony was going to catch on if she didn't get herself back in gear. Poor Spike! Twilight knew how sensitive he was about his job, and saying something like that would've been sure to make him question his cooking skill.

"I'm sorry, Spike." Twilight apologized. "The pancakes are delicious." She assured him, though she still had yet to actually eat a bite. "I just...I've been thinking about stuff lately. The pancakes are fine, really."

"Oh...okay!" Spike exclaimed, so happy that his skills weren't in question that he couldn't have possibly noticed anything flimsy with Twilight's excuse. Like that it was the same one she gave last night. They finished breakfast, though Twilight ate slowly.

Spike gathered up all the dishes and started washing them, freeing Twilight to do whatever she so pleased. She decided to go the table and pick out a book from the library's shelves for herself to read. It was a short book. A small book.

She finished it quickly. She picked out another book and started reading it. It was also short and small, so she finished it as quickly as the last one. Then she did the same a couple more times before noticing something.

The reason the books were so small and short was that they were picture books. Children's stories. And as she looked at the pile of finished books, she noticed one more thing about them.

They all had pink covers.

Pursing her lips in slight embarrassment, despite that there were no ponies around to see her choice in books, and even if they did, they wouldn't have known about the connection between her books and her fantasies.

She levitated all of the books off the table and started putting them back into their spots on the shelves. That done, she walked up to the bottom of a shelf and tried to pick out a book that wasn't pink with her hoof. She found her hoof to be shaking, unwilling to pick any other color then that fusion of white and red. She closed her eyes in concentration, trying to get herself to pick a book. She wasn't crazy. She just needed more pink.

Ah, yes...but reading a pink book wasn't what she meant by 'more pink' was it? No, no it wasn't. Having reminded herself of that, she almost was able to pick up a green tome, her hoof curled around it, when a knock came from the door. Slightly frustrated that she won her victory over herself only to have it cut short, she curtly walked over to the door and pulled it open. Pinkie Pie and Rarity were standing there, Pinkie in her apron with a concerned look on her face, while Rarity looked happy. Fake happy, like she was trying not to let her frustration about something show through.

Pinkie Pie...oh, neither of the two of them knew how hard it was for Twilight to see Pinkie's face marred by any emotion other then happiness like that. It was painful. Heart wracking. Devastating. Mind-shattering.

Twilight mentally took in a deep breath. She had to stay in control. She had to keep things together.

"Hey guys! What's up?" The words. The words were escaping her mouth, joyfully without anything that could hint at the extreme amounts of discipline needed to spit them out.

"A very successful buisnesspony wants to buy Sugarcube Corner!" Rarity happily informed her, like this was a good thing. This was a good thing? How could this have possibly been-be a good thing!? Stay calm, Twilight. Stay in control. It's Rarity, remember? She goes gaga over anything from Canterlot. She probably thought this businesspony buying the Corner would've been good for her. If he just so happened to see a customer wearing one of Rarity's designs . . .

"But, here's the thing, darling . . ." Rarity added. "He said he'd only buy if he could replicate Pinkie's baking. We've tried Applejack, Rainbow Dash, and Fluttershy, and ourselves, and well . . . suffice to say, we need you to be a tiebreaker."

Twilight nodded. "Okay."

"Here." Rarity lifted a cupcake to Twilight's nose. "This is one of his cupcakes. Try it."

Twilight looked at the cupcake for a second. The wrapping was green. It was clearly meant to be a friendly green, like a watermelon or something. A green balloon or whatever. But Twilight's...thoughts about Pinkie made her think of it as a poison color. The frosting on was blue, like the tiny base of a low flame.

With some apprehension, Twilight raised her hoof to take the cupcake from Rarity. Unwrapping it, she bit into it.

The cupcake wasn't bad. It was decent. Tolerable. 'Scrumptious,' even, but it felt like stingers on Twilight's mouth. How could anypony possibly think this thing anything like Pinkie's delicious, tasty, homemade with tender-loving care cupcakes? This was clearly made by an unthinking machine, programmed to copy and paste whatever had been fit into a piece of paper.

Stay calm, Twilight. Just . . . just STAY . . . CALM.

She had to nail this. She had to get this right. She had to be angry about this. Angry that Rarity would be so happy about the prospect of Sugarcube Corner being sold. Angry enough to show that she had been slighted for her friend Pinkie Pie, without being so angry as to suggest she thought of Pinkie Pie as anything otherwise.

"I can't believe you, Rarity!" She snapped at her white opposite. "How can this be anything like Pinkie's perfect pastries? How could any of our friends think that!? It's good, but nowhere near as good as Pinkie's baking. Right, Pinkie?"

Pinkie visibly cheered up, obviously happy that Twilight had taken her side.

Rarity seemed to have taken a knock back to Equestria from Twilight's mini-lecture. "Right, right, of course . . . I see. I'm sorry, Pinkie. I should have been against the idea from the start."

"It's okay!" Pinkie assured her. "I knew you were excited to have a Canterlot pony here in Ponyville! Oh, yeah!" Pinkie turned to Twilight. "Thanks for saying that, Twilight. It means a lot to me."

"You're welcome, Pinki-" Twilight was interrupted by Pinkie pulling her into a hug.

Oh Celestia! Pinkie was touching her! Pinkie was touching her! Pinkie . . . was TOUCHING her!

Twilight's eye drifted about. Pinkie had pulled Twilight's head against her chest. Did she mean to do that? Probably not. In spite of that, Twilight took the risky opportunity to nuzzle her cheek against Pinkie's cotton candy soft, curved, little pony bosom. The extremely risky opportunity, as Rarity was right there. Thankfully, the tailor noticed nothing but a moment of kinship between two friends.

"Come on, Pinkie." Rarity urged, putting a hoof on Pinkie's shoulder. "Let's go break the bad news, hmm?"

"Okay!" Pinkie gently removed herself from Twilight. The fascinated unicorn stumbled forward as Pinkie left, not wanted to be removed from her yet.

Twilight shook her head. There was no way it could last forever. After watching Pinkie bounce while Rarity walked, she closed the door.

Oh, the bouncing! She had forgotten about the bouncing. The way Pinkie's curled tail would swing to-and-fro, mesmerizing any soul unfortunate enough to catch sight of its sway . . .

Still, Twilight had to breath a sigh of relief. She had nailed it; angry enough to show she was Pinkie's friend without showing any indication of her . . . recent thoughts about the baker.

Nopony suspected anything yet.

. . . But would she be able to keep it that way?
> Personal Spatial Anomaly
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

Twilight stood there with her back to the door, trying to think of any sort of mnemonic devices to make sure her control wasn't endangered. Asking Pinkie that, saying what she had said to Spike . . . she was losing it, she was sure!

Wait, wait . . . remember the books, Twilight. She had almost gotten down a green book when . . . what was it that kept her from getting down the green book again?

Oh yes, Rarity . . . the name rolled through her mind with the beat of an angry drummer from a rock band. A trashy rock band, at that. Twilight tried to tell herself she shouldn't be too mad at Rarity. This sort of thing was not uncommon and not unexpected of her, and she was going have to prepare for in the future if she wanted her's and Rarity's friendship to last. Oh . . . oh, oh-oooh-oh, and Pinkie was there too!

She gotten the most wonderful experience . . . well, not quite. She was thinking of that she had eluded Rarity's suspicions and gotten to cuddle against Pinkie Pie's chest. Really, that was more a subset of the true most wonderful experience; being able to make Pinkie Pie happy. Twilight thought about how she had turned Pinkie's frown upside down for a long while. Seeing that face swirl and contort upwards back into its normal expression carefree glee . . . She had did that. She had done that. It was nice to make Pinkie happy. She spent so much time and effort in making other ponies happy, she deserved somepony to make her happy for once.

Somepony . . . to make her happy. Twilight Sparkle promised herself, she'd be that somepony, one way or another.

Another knock on the door. Who could that have been now?

Twilight tore her thoughts away from Pinkie (reluctantly) and started kicking in all the social conventions she had read about to greet whoever was on the other side of the door. It was a very orange (as usual, seeing as that was the color of her coat) Applejack with a proud smile on her face.

"Hey, Applejack! What brings you over?" Twilight exclaimed, experiencing the sensation of being genuinely happy to see her friend. Something she hadn't been able to feel in a while.

"Just wanted to congratulate ya." Applejack answered. "Rarity's over talking that Canterlot snub outta the deal right now."

"O . . . kay." Twilight said, feeling of happiness subsiding. She didn't want to discuss Rarity right now.

Applejack lopped a leg over her shoulder. "Ya talked some sense into her, Twi'. Take it from somepony who's done it firsthoof; with Rarity, that takes sum doin'."

"All right then." Twilight concluded, attempting to end the conversation off.

Applejack adjusted her hat. "Well, I'll leave y'all to your business." She turned around to leave, but what she said got Twilight thinking; business! She should invite Applejack to accompany her with her business for the day! It'd be a great way to get her mind off Pinkie Pie for a little while. Left to her own devices in the library, who knows what trouble her secret desire would stir up? Celestia probably did. Not out of omnipotence, but because she'd been around enough to able to predict how these kind of things went.

"Hey, Applejack!" Twilight called after her. "You wanna go out with me?"

Poor choice of words? Not really. Tone, volume and context would keep Applejack from making the wrong conclusion. Besides, Applejack was sociable enough to know she meant 'out with me while I do aforementioned business' and not a date.

"Eh, shore. Can't think of a reason why not."

Twilight walked outside, closing the door behind her, thoughts of Pinkie Pie forgotten. Well, she told herself they were forgotten, but they never were. Just pushed to the side when they're not relevant.

Once they had reached the entryway into the market stall area, where a bunch of ponies were going about their day, Applejack began making small town small talk with her.

"So, how's life been for ya in Ponyville?"

"Fine." Twilight replied flatly. Truth be told, since having arrived, Twilight felt she could live anywhere now, so long as her friends there with her. Not that she'd ever ask them to move.

Applejack nodded her head. "Good, good . . ."

Applejack was terrible at lying. This was a well-known fact. She wasn't much better at hiding things. Twilight could tell something was on her mind. The intense amounts of control she had been exerting over herself the last few days gave her the insider knowledge to sense when other ponies were hiding something.

"What is it, Applejack?"

Applejack looked taken aback. Clearly, she hadn't been expecting Twilight to read her so easily. Her self-pride had likely lulled her into thinking she was being too secretive for Twilight to pick her scent.

"Ehhh . . . well . . ." Applejack tripped over her words. On purpose, Twilight could tell, so that she didn't have to admit whatever it was to Twilight.

Twilight took in a deep breath. Another situation that would require control. Perfect! She could examine the results of where-in-ever her conversation was about to go and maybe, just maybe, identify where the stress points in her control where and eliminate them. A nice plan, but it was easier said than done. She had to confront Applejack without being so harsh as to make Applejack rethink their friendship together. A gentle approach first, then slowly getting rougher til she had her answer.

"Applejack, what's wrong?" Twilight asked concernedly, stepping around her friend.

"Well, Ah . . . Ah know you have some . . . problems with Pinkie Pie's . . . antics." Applejack explained. Which was true, as far as anypony knew. Twilight, reasoning founded in logic and study, was more often than not exasperated by Pinkie Pie's, whose bodily capabilities of levitating, mysteriously appearing and disappearing, and producing a spit-free, 101-percent germ free cake from her mouth for other ponies to eat, defied all logic. This was something Twilight was aware of. Her inner scientist refused to accept this. But another part of her, the part that Pinkie had ensnared in a seemingly hopeless spell, thought this made her all the more interesting . . . all the more mysterious . . . and mysteries . . . were an awfully tempting sort.

There was still the issue of what Applejack was so gosh-darn'ed concerned about.

"Applejack, I know about my own issues, but . . . why did you bring that up now?"

Applejack looked away. "Well, Ah . . . It jus' . . . look, Ah thought' y'all should know to expec' a visit from Cheerilee later in the evenin'."

"Who's Cheerilee?"

"Our one-and-only school teache'r!' Applejack answered.

One and only? Twilight repeated in her head. A single teacher might be enough for a small town. Which Ponyville was . . . but it wasn't that small! There were numerous districts across the plotting of the land, the distance between which easily allotted for the need of more than one school!

Calm down, Twilight, quickly! Losing control! Losing focus! Ignore the resource questions that brought to mind! Focus . . . focus on the issue at hoof . . . which was . . .

"Why?"

"Why wut?"

"Why should I expect a visit from Cheeriliee?"

Once again, Applejack looked away. "Well, uh . . . see, here's the thang', Twi' . . . Ah, well, Ah can't tell ya. Nopony can. But ya need to be told."

Applejack barely noticed the tempo of Twilight's internal debate, trying to decide whether or not it was reasonable of her to be frustrated by now. Because she was by now. What had her books said?

. . . Oh, forget it!

NO! Don't forget it! Forgetting just one piece of the inner control network she had rigged up could cause the entire thing to collapse, causing any and everything she didn't want her friends to know about. Like Pinkie . . . or this one time when she was a foal when she- well, it doesn't matter what she did. She didn't want her friends to know about it, now did she?

"Applejack, what is it you need to tell me that you can't tell me!?"

Applejack started stepping in place. A common behavior of ponies who were nervous. "Well, Ah, uh . . . Ah think Big Macintosh is getting overru'n!"

Twilight somewhat irritably looked around for the apple stall where Big Macintosh was sure to be working. There he was, chewing on his hay stalk with business looking . . . rather slow.

"No he isn't."

"Shore he is!" Applejack insisted. She grabbed the nearest stallion from the crowd around them and whispered something into his ear. He nodded. She then lifted him up and threw him up to in the air, landing right on top of the counter of Big Macintosh's stall.

Big Macintosh facehooved, having been through this routine before. He cleared his throat and started flailing his hoof into the air, making whinnies meant to sound like he was being attacked. The flung stallion somewhat awkwardly got his hooves, standing on the counter and very unconvincingly pretended to be attacking Macintosh.

"Help!" Big Macintosh squawked. Hearing that big, strong husky voice make such a weak sounding noise, Twilight couldn't suppress a chuckle. "Ah'm being attacked!

"Yes!" The other stallion agreed. "And I am the mean pony who is attacking him!"

"Hang on, big brother! Ah'll save ya!" Applejack 'reassured' him heroically, leaping into action and lunging at the colt, pushing him off the table and them both hidden out of sight behind the counter.

"Ya! Hoo! Take that, ya varmint!" The sounds of mock-fighting puffed from behind the counter.

Twilight raised an eyebrow. Did Applejack just sway a random stallion into pretending to attack Big Macintosh so she'd have an excuse to get away? Based on Macintosh's calmness, the colt's poor acting, and Applejack's even worse of the same, Twilight had to come to the conclusion. Shaking her head to dismiss it, she turned around to get other things from the market. Geez, Applejack. Twilight thought she had-

Pinkie was bouncing along the street.

-Issues . . .

Oh dear . . . Pinkie was bouncing along the street, the way she normally did. Normal for Pinkie, at any rate, her tail lowering and raising like a lever from her jumping. Twilight's eyes locked in on it. Being in . . . l . . . lo . . . l . . .whatever she was with Pinkie made her notice the oddest things. Like that Pinkie's tail was swaying up and down instead of left to right. Before Twilight could notice in her enchante, her tail started arching itself, like a ocean wave. In fact, the wave shape moved from her one of her tail to the other, really making it look an seafront waves traveling through it. The swishing movements kept changing in tempo, trying to synch-chrono-nize with Pinkie Pie's tail. Twilight was still a little aware of herself, enough to not be a danger, but insufficient to prevent herself from suddenly bending all four knees, making her stomach mere inches off the ground. She unbent her knees, then bent them again- a dance movement to accompany Pinkie's own. She might've started humming any second now.

"Twi'? Ya all right there, pardner? Whassup wit' yer tail?"

Oh, hay! Twilight swore to herself at Applejack's return. Quick, think of a lie! No! Lying is a terrible thing to do to friends! Think of an ambiguously-worded response!

"Oh, hello again, A.J! I was just . . . distracted by something I saw in the stalls."

"Somethun' tha made yer tail go all wavy?"

Twilight attempted to do something she had only recently learned to do with much and strange training- blushing on command. With her thoughts about Pinkie, she reasoned with herself if she could make herself blush when she wasn't actually embarrassed, it could make her shoddy excuse believable, and her believable ones even more so. She 'cheated' a little with it, having a tiny of amount of magic used for it- just small enough not to be noticed by magic-insensitive ponies. Celestia would've seen right through it.

"Yeah!" Twilight answered, cheeks painted over. "What . . . can I say, Applejack? It . . . hypnotized me."

"Hypnotized!?" Applejack exclaimed in surprise. "Why, that's cheatin'! No-good varmint's gonna hypnotize all the townsfolk into buying his stuff! Where is he, Twi'? Ah'll buck some sense into 'im!"

Twilight 'eee'ed. That hadn't gone the way she wanted it to at all!

"Uh, Applejack? I think it was supposed to hypnotize me. You know, it was a gaudy show-off. Like a magic 8-ball."

Applejack raised an eyebrow. "Y'all mean . . . like a novelty item store?"

Oh good! A reasonable explanation. "Yeah! Like a novelty store!"

"Twi, Ah don't think the market has any novelty stores."

Oh, come on, Applejack! Either provide a reasonable explanation that lets Twilight off the hook, or question her something she has to answer about quickly! Don't flip-flop between the two!

. . . Calm. Gotta stay calm. Frustration clouds judgement . . . and makes excuse less believable, more flimsy. Calm. Calmness . . .

"I think it's that way." Twilight pointed to the far end of the market. Applejack took off running for it.

Twilight turned the opposite direction to gallop away, putting enough distance between her and Applejack that the time it would take for Applejack to get back, Twilight would have something acceptable to answer her approaching exclamation of "It's not there!" But when she turned around, she immediately saw a pair of bright, blue eyes staring at her.

"GYAH!" Twilight literally jumped backwards in fright. Taking in deep breathes, during which she caught the faintest, faintest hint of pastries in the air. "Oh, Pinkie! . . . You sca- . . . " Twilight stopped. Pinkie would've been upset to know she had scared her friend. "You surprised me."

"Oh, did I?" Pinkie squealed in her usual tone of voice. "Good! I love surprising ponies!"

Twilight started brushing her hair into her eyes, so as to avoid looking too directly at Pinkie's and getting lost in them . . . so blue and bustling with unending energy . . . like the endless sky . . . oh, Celestia! She wasn't even looking at them and was doing it anyways!

"W-w-what are you doing here, Pinkie?" Twilight blubbered out, sounding more like their friend Fluttershy than herself. She was prevented from getting an answer by a returning Applejack.

"Gosh darn it, Twi'!" Applejack said as she came back. "Ah went through eve'ry inch of the market and Ah can't find the gosh darn thang!"

"What are you looking for?" Pinkie asked.

"Sum novelty store. Twilight said she saw it." Applejack answered.

"Oh, really?" Pinkie questioned, looking confused. "They must be falling down on the job."

" . . . Wut?"

"The novelty shop's only open from six to eight." Pinkie explained. "Nopony's supposed to be able to see it at any other time. So, since Twilight saw, the pony who operates the disappearing wands must not be doing their job well!"

Applejack was bewildered at first, but when she thought about it, the novelty store being invisible in the market except for certain times made sense for what it was. The late time kept impressionable young ponies from trying to purchase something with their allowance that would pave the way toward a life of mischief. Best if the prank items were all left to the adults who knew the limits of what was 'okay' on that sort of thing. Neither of them noticed Twilight signing in relief.

"Right, so anyway, what was I doing here was looking for you two!" Pinkie belatedly answered Twilight's question.

"Shore thang, sugarcube. Whaddya need us fer?"

"I'm having a picnic later today! I was hoping you two could come! I mean, Rarity, Fluttershy and Dash are all going to be there, so I was really hoping you two could come, because if they were there and you weren't that would be sad and I don't like-"

Applejack stuck her hoof into Pinkie's mouth. "We'll come. Right, Twi'?"

"A picnic?" Twilight exclaimed, caught off-guard. "Oh, gee, I don't know . . . I, uh . . . I have to go blow something up for the Princess."

"Ooh! I love, love, LOVE blowing things up! Who doesn't, right?"

"Wait now, Ah thought y'all already blew something up for the Princess the other day?"

"It's . . . I . . ." Twilight stammered. She had already done all the exploding of materials that Princess Celestia was going to be having her doing, at least for the month. Twilight looked at Pinkie Pie, beaming and smiling as always.

Because if they were there and you weren't that would be sad and I don't like-

You don't like making ponies sad. Twilight mentally finished the abruptly ended sentence, 'spite its having long passed away. I wouldn't like making you sad, Pinkie Pie . . . 

"Of course I'll come, Pinkie!"

"Great!" Pinkie clapped her forehooves together.

"Oh, Pinkie!" Twilight said suddenly, remembering something. "Applejack said I should be expecting a visit from Cheerilee? And I think you have something to do with it."

Pinkie looked offended. "Applejack! You were supposed to keep that a secret!"

"Uh, eee . . . Ah, er . . . Ah . . . Ah have tah . . . Ah need to go talk to that colt that attacked Big Macintosh." Applejack nervously said, galloping off. "See ya at the picnic!"

Twilight nodded. "Uhm-hmm." Yes, A.J. The colt that 'attacked' Big Macintosh. Presumably, the farmer was off to give the 'attacker' a stern talking-to. Or maybe, instead, some compensation for being randomly picked out of a group of strangers to pretend to be an assailant.

Pinkie flashed Twilight a grin big enough to show teeth before turning around and bouncing off. Twilight's tail started doing that wave-bobbing thing as she watched her go.

Oh, Pinkie Pie . . . 





Oh, Pinkie Pie, you couldn't possibly know

the amount of control

It takes for me to say just 'hello!'

And not invite you over

You couldn't possibly see

How much a foal you make of me

I -want you- . . . to wrap me up . . . in your curly tail.

Your flouncy ears, your bubbly, infectious smile-

Make talking to you

So worth while

Even if I can't have you in the sense I WANT to have you

So, for now, I'll just nod my head and smile

Smile, smile, smile, smile,

Smile, smile, smile, smile

Smiiile . . .

Smmmiiiillle . . .

Smmmmiiiiile . . . for you . . .




Twilight made a round-trip across the market, marking things off her grocery list, which had to be quickly altered to for some picnic supplies. It might've made her grunt in frustration-all the hours she spent carefully planning details down to the dot, all wasted. It was okay, though. It was for Pinkie. Nothing was too good for her.

After purchasing all that she had planned to and improvised to, Twilight started on her trek back home. She started wishing Applejack hadn't left: Twilight could've used a strong pony like her to help with the grocery load.

Pressing onward, Twilight eventually got back home where Spike was quick to notice that something had happened- he had lived with her for so long, it was easy for him to tell when something happened. In this case, it was that Twilight hadn't gotten items he didn't remember writing on any list that gave it away.

"So, what's up?" The baby dragon inquired.

"Pinkie Pie's hosting a picnic later today. I had to get some things." Twilight told him.

"Ooh! Can I come?"

"I don't see why not." Twilight answered, shifting, sorting and organizing the groceries. "Spike? Would you mind helping with these?"

"Sure!" Spike, humbled to help, happily hopped into action . . . but there was a slight nag. Twilight suddenly seemed unable to decide what to keep for her and Spike and what to bring to the picnic. It was quite evident just how much excessive control Twilight Sparkle was exercising over herself that Spike had no idea that the desire to lavish Pinkie Pie was what was making Twilight so indecisive.

Lighten up, Twilight thought to herself.

How!? She said to herself in response.

It's not like Pinkie Pie is going to know the exact nature of the groceries you bought and will get upset you didn't offer some at the picnic, right?

Well, with Pinkie she just might know what groceries I bought, but yeah, yeah you have a point . . . 

That resolved with nothing to indicate to Spike his superintendent was talking to herself in her head, Twilight finally settled on an arrangement of the groceries. The ones on the list to start with would stay, while the things she hastily tacked on would go out with them.

Twilight looked at the clock. Pinkie hadn't specified the time, but she was sure Dash or Rarity would come get her for it.

"We still have some time before the picnic, Spike. Why don't you take some personal time while we wait?"

"Sure!" Spike agreed eagerly. Twilight knew how hard he worked. He deserved a little break every now and again. (Though sometimes he would pester Twilight for it just a little too much.)

With food packed into a bag, and not pressed for time, Twilight felt safe using her magic levitating a book out from a shelf behind her.

She hesitated, recalling the incident earlier that day. She closed her eyes in caution, levitated the book back, then picked out another one which she brought to her nose.

It was pink.

And to top it off, after turning her around to the shelf and doing some quick calculations, (quick to her, at least) the book she had picked it up first- which she had put back because she thought it was going to be pink- . . . was not pink.

Twilight signed in defeat and merely placed the book out before her. It was an impressive tome. A powerful tome. It was very, very rare for a book, which one of Twilight's dominating personality aspects was deep-seated fondness for . . .

To be able to bore her. Her! It sounds crazy, crazy, but there was something about this book that just got to her. That made her see why ponies like Rainbow Dash didn't like them. It went on and on and on about stupid things, things that didn't matter to the plot. Like dirt. there was a whole twelve pages dedicated . . . to dirt!

Twilight was finding it really, really . . . borin-aaaayaaaawwwnnnn . . .




Ohhhhhg . . . 

"Where . . . where am I?" Twilight rubbed her sorely and looked up. She was in her little dream void. Normally, it was pitch-black with only a prop or two to suggest anything about her location. There was two.

The white unicorn DJ that was so often there when she was trying to track Pinkie's spellbinding tunes with a full set of equipment that was completely set up, stereos, turntables . . . the works.

Beneath Twilight's hooves, a bunch of glass panels. Looking very closely, closely into them Twilight could light bulbs. She looked at the DJ.

The DJ gave her an approving hoofs-up, smiled charmingly, and pulled out a record that she started scratching. As the music- techno, for all intents and purposes- started blaring out of the stereos, the DJ looked annoyed with her. The DJ motioned for Twilight to do something, but she had no idea what.

The panels beneath her starting flickering on and off in various different pattens and colors. Blue, yellow, red, green, white.

Twilight, struggling to grasp what the DJ wanted from her, started doing the tail-wave-dance she had done in the marketplace.

The DJ smiled and nodded her head approvingly. Apparently this what she had wanted!

Twilight did her little dance in best-as-she-could-muster sync with the stereos. The music began changing in pace and beat. Twilight, feeling confident from the DJ's approval, started improvising new dance moves which including bucking, standing on her hind legs alone and waggling her front ones from the sides of her body and cartwheeling forward. The lights beneath also sped up and starting forming faster, different patterns.

Then they stopped.

Twilight stopped dancing, perturbed as to why the lights would suddenly go out like that. The DJ started pointing at one light in particular.

Twilight looked at it, half-thinking she could figure out why the lights stopped. She could, actually. It was a very easy thing to figure out . . .

The next light, the light that should've lit after the last one that did before they all went out . . . was supposed to be pink when it lit up.

Her black dream world could have color, except that one. Her dream was void of pink.

Thinking more emotionally than rationally at this point, Twilight approached the supposed-to-be-pink light and tapped the glass once. She tapped it again, thinking she might be able to make it work.

She didn't see the DJ trying to hoofmotion for her to stop.

She tapped it one last time, then it gave way, sinking her hoof into the panel where it smashed the bulb.

And the power came on.

Pumping all the electricity that was supposed to go into the glass casing into her.

"AAAAAAAAH! AAAAHHHHH! AAAAAAAAAAAAH!"

The DJ quickly galloped over to offer aid, but the electricity seemed to have its own free will, for it blasted her backwards.

"AAAAAAAAH! AAAAAAAAAAEEHHHH!"

Wha-thump-a-thump!




Twilight didn't understand at first why Spike was clutching her body protectively.

"Spike?" Twilight barely managed to say. It was like her breath was short. "What are you doing?"

"You started whimpering." Spike explained. "Really badly, so I got worried. I think somepony's at the door."

"Right, right . . . " Twilight pushed herself up off the book she had fallen asleep, trying to show to Spike she was fine. Difficult, as the dream had scared her so badly that her real world body had started showing signs of fear. She hobbled over to the door and opened it to be greeted by an impatient Rainbow Dash.

"Hey, Twilight! Picnic's about to start. Where you been? Don't tell me you spent the whole time reading books!"

"A book." Twilight corrected, wiping the drowsiness from her eyes. "And I didn't read it, I feel asleep in it."

"You? You fell asleep in a book?" Dash was understandably incredulous.

"I know!" Twilight replied. "Who'da thought? Spike, get the food I bought!"

Spike seemed reluctant to leave Twilight's side, but he saluted and starting gathering up the bag, which was bigger than he was. (Not that that size was hard to reach . . .)

Dash raised an eyebrow, noticing Twilight's shallow breathing. "Hey, you okay?"

"Yeah." Twilight assured her. "Fine. Just had a bad dream. I'm fine, okay? . . . I'm . . . I'm fine."

"Uh, Twilight? You said you're fine four times."

Twilight looked away from Dash. Losing control again, losing. Need to get it back. Which wouldn't be as easy as normally. She wasn't fine. It was becoming quite evident that the electrocution in her dream had been intense.

"Come on. Let's go." Twilight insisted, moving herself around Rainbow Dash. "I should be fine, fine by the time we get to the picnic."

Dash and Spike exchanged worried looks before tailing behind her.

It didn't take too long for them to get to where Pinkie had chosen to be the picnic's location, but Twilight couldn't help but notice something . . . amongst the patch of grass, softly billowing in the gentle breeze, or rather . . .

"Dash, no pony else is here. I thought you said we were going to be late?"

"Well, yeah. Listen, Twilight, you're new here, so I don't know whether you're 'awesome' material like I am, and awesome ponies consider anything less than 'before everypony else gets there' late." Dash explained carefreely.

Twilight did her best to not be frustrated, but with her traumatic experience in the dream, it was hard to muster any control at all. She manged to keep herself from lashing out, but her face was making it more then clear she disapproved of Dash's doings.

Dash noticed. "Right!" Dash wrapped her shoulder around Twilight and pulled her in. "So, for future reference, you're not awesome material, amIrite?"

Twilight growled and shoved Dash off.

"Okay, I can see you're mad." Dash said backing away. "I'm gonna go fly while you cool off, cool?"

Dash zoomed upwards into the air.

Twilight was not cool with this.

"AARG! Spike!"

"What?"

"Go . . . do what Rainbow Dash is doing! I'm so angry right now, I might just do something I'll regret!"

Spike backed away, nodded, then skipped off over to the distance where he found a snail trailing on some plant. The baby dragon felt his instincts take over, rubbing his claws in anticipation of cracking the snail open and eating the gooey slug inside.

Twilight paced around in circles, trying to wait for her anger to fade. She took in a deep breath and exhaled. There was really nothing to be angry about. Sure, Dash had dragged her out early for a stupid reason, but it was better then being dragged out late for a stupid reason, right?

In fact, now that she was thinking about, what exactly was she going to do if Dash hadn't come over when she did? The thumping that was the first thing she heard . . . that been Dash's knocking and she was certain it had woken her up when Spike couldn't. She was about to call to signal Dash and Spike could come back now when she was approached from her side.

"Oh hi there! You're here early, aren't'cha?"

Pinkie Pie! Oh dear! She was so close . . . so close to her. If she was quiet, she could've said anything to Pinkie . . . anything . . . and Spike and Rainbow Dash wouldn't be any wiser, Dash up in the sky and Spike off chasing a snail like the immature dragon he was.

Before Twilight could command her body not to, her hoof shot around Pinkie's and curled it up.

Pinkie looked at the intermingled limbs oddly.

Twilight bit her lip, afraid of how Pinkie might react. Would she figure out how Twilight had been thinking about her recently? Was Pinkie going to shake her hoof and accuse of invading her personal privacy?

"OOOH! I get it! We're playing a game, right?" Pinkie exclaimed.

Twilight rolled her eyes. Really, even accounting that she was new to Ponyville, how long did it take understand what kind of pony-or whatever she was- Pinkie was?

Seeing an opportunity to put herself in the clear, Twilight told Pinkie yes.

"Yes, yes, we're playing a game!"

"What's it called?" Pinkie asked excitedly.

"I don't know yet. I made it up just now."

Pinkie gasped audibly. " (HUUU!) Made-up-just-now kind of games are my favorite kind of games! How do we play?"

"First, I put my hoof around yours . . ." Twilight wriggled the hoof she already had wrapped around Pinkie's. "Then I put my other hoof around yours . . ." Pinkie was all too happy to let Twilight wrap her other hoof around her's.

"Then what do we do?"

"Then we . . . " Twilight said quietly, silently. "Then we . . . " Twilight lifted Pinkie's hooves off the ground and started pulling her closer. "Then we . . . "

"Then what?" Pinkie whined. "The suspense is killing me!"

"Then . . . we-" Twilight was about ready to pull Pinkie into her arms and kiss her with all the ravenous intentions of a murderous predator when they both heard a startled yelp. Both ponies turned around to see a most . . . amusing sight.

Spike, looking quite uncertain of himself, hanging upside down, the point of his tail firmly clamping into Fluttershy's mouth the way mother lionesses bite on their cubs' manes to pick them up. Fluttershy's forehead was drenched in green guck, having been slimed over by the snail Spike had been after. Fluttershy had probably saved the snail from Spike and he was being hung the way he was as punishment. It was well-known that Fluttershy cared for animals of all shapes and sizes.

Fluttershy flew over to Twilight and Pinkie and dropped Spike in front of them.

"Have we learned our lesson?" Fluttershy asked commandingly.

"Yes . . . " Spike answered, embarrassed.

"Good!" Fluttershy reprimanded before reaching to her head and softly removing the snail from it. She flew away some distance, presumably to drop the snail somewhere it'd be safe from rampaging baby dragons.

"Hey," Spike said at the sight of Twilight and Pinkie's hooves curled around the others. "What are you two doing?"

"It's a game that Twilight made up just now!"

"A game?" Fluttershy squeaked fearfully. "Will we have to tackle anypony?"

"Nope! Well, maybe. Twilight's still making it up, aren'tcha Twilight?"

"Yeah . . . " Twilight answered, slowly lowering Pinkie's hooves and unclasping the. "It's . . . still a work in progress."

Dash came flying down. Rarity and Applejack arrived in different directions just afterwards.

"Well," Rarity said, levitating a water pail that splashed water about, "I brought this for Applejack, but I see it is Fluttershy who will require assistance in being cleaned up."

Applejack huffed, while Fluttershy bashfully looked up at the snail slime on her forehead.

"Come along, Fluttershy." Rarity guided Fluttershy away, so that when she dumped the water on the pegasi' head, the slime wouldn't overflow and get into the food.

Twilight was sitting there, torn while everypony started getting into the food. She wasn't sure whether to be angry her moment with Pinkie Pie had been interrupted before she could've consumed the pink pony in her lust, or thankful that she been prevented from making a serious move too soon. She barely, barely managed to decide on the latter. Barely.

"Right, right, face me, Flutteshy . . . " Rarity instructed, trying to position Fluttershy where the water wouldn't splash somepony's face. It'd would've been so rude of a lady to do that, eh wot?

"Oh!" Pinkie exclaimed between mouthfuls of cake. "Hey, Twilight! Wanna see something funny!?"

"Sure!" Twilight answered Pinkie's call eagerly and obediently, like a well-trained hound heeding the call of its huntsmare.

"Take my hoof!" Pinkie held her hoof out.

"All right then, just here . . ." Rarity muttered to herself, levitating the pail above Fluttershy's head.

Twilight took Pinkie's hoof, as instructed.

BZZZZZZZZZZZT!

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAH!"

The sheer volume of Twilight's scream caused Rarity to lose her grip on the pail, causing it to smaaaanng against Fluttershy's head and, despite Rarity's preventive efforts, splash water on everypony. Applejack, Rarity, and Dash all just closed their eyes in response, but Pinkie was too taken aback by Twilight's scream to register anything. Twilight swung her hoof outward, blinded by the water in her eyes and hair, causing her to twirl herself forward and step her hind hoof into some salad.

Twilight rubbed her hoof against her eyes, trying to clear them of water, to find everypony looking at her. Sure, a joy buzzer like the one on Pinkie's hoof gave a jolt, was a startling experience, and maybe it did warrant screaming, but that much, that loud? They didn't know. How could they have known about her dream, her dream, whereupon reaching for that lush color caused her to have been pumped with amperes and amperes of electricity, and in a way . . . in a weird, symbolic way, her dream had come to pass.

Maybe the scream was a little much, but scientific testing had shown then when somepony is hit by somepony close to them, the body really does react more then if it was a stranger. It really does hurt more to be hurt by somepony close.

And the most disturbing thing . . . the most disturbing, disturbing thing, the most unsettling thing, was that after a quick calculation . . . after Twilight's fast, quick numerical calculation . . . If Twilight hadn't been blinded by water when she swung her hoof . . . if she could've seen clearly . . .

She would've had slapped Pinkie.
> Boiling Point
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

As her friends attempted to salvage what could be of the picnic's food, each having agreed they should probably reschedule this for another time after the incident with the pail, Twilight stood still for two reasons. One, she didn't know what to do about the salad on her hoof. Two, the notion of having slapped Pinkie was still ringing around in her head. Slapping Pinkie . . . even with all her ability to appear in one place at random, there should not have been anyway for Pinkie Pie to know what had gone on in her dreamscape.

But that didn't make it hurt less.

If anything, it made it hurt more. She didn't realize what she was doing. 'Ignorance is bliss' or say the saying goes.

"Well!" Rarity huffed with a head flick. "I say once we've got everything we can save gathered up, I say we all head for the spa. At least that way, we'll all be wet of our own volition."

"Sounds good, Ah guess." Applejack replied. Everypony but Twilight voiced their agreement, though Dash's was more reluctantly than the others.

"What about you, Twilight?"

Twilight reared her neck back. She was still thinking about Pinkie, about all the horrible, horrible things that could've happened to their friendship if that slap had connected to really care about whether or not she wanted to go the spa.

"Oh, gee, I'd- I'd love to, but um, I don't know what to do about . . ." Twilight didn't know what to do about a lot of things recently, but to specify, she raised her back hoof, showing the salad goop stuck to it. She briefly considered just wiping on the grass, but Fluttershy would probably have a fit at her like she to Spike moments ago.

"Oh, just wipe your hoof over there." Fluttershy said, pointing a patch of dirt a leg's length away from the picnic's location. "The ants will appreciate it."

In a certain world that started with 'E' and ended with 'H', the idea of having a picnic so close to where ants were known to lay would've made the residents recoil. But the ponies of Equestria all shared connections with nature, no matter their type, so ants wouldn't be an issue so long as someone who could speak gently -like Fluttershy- was around to request they go away.

Twilight limped on three hooves over to Fluttershy's suggested location, her salad-soaked hoof raised to make less of a mess. Once there, with Fluttershy's nodded approval, Twilight stuck her hoof into the grass and smeared the plantation with the ruined food. Once her appendage was clear, Twilight quickly galloped away so that when the ants came out, she wouldn't step on them.

Rarity brushed passed Fluttershy to intercept the Sparkle pony. "I'm afraid, Twilight, that I never got your confirmation as to whether or not you would like the idea of a spa trip."

"Y-yeah." Twilight stuttered. "Sounds great!" She looked forward to spending time with her friends, even if it wasn't how they were planning on spending it originally . . . and then there was Pinkie.

Spike and all the ponies rounded up, Rarity took point in leading the way to the spa. A few ponies going about their daily lives waved as they're group walked by. A few shyer ones hid behind their manes the way Fluttershy did.

Twilight kept looking at Pinkie, then looking up ahead at where Rarity was taking them before Pinkie could notice. At least the first few times. She slipped up and stared just a little too long, allowing Pinkie to see that she was being stared at.

Twilight bit her lips and blushed at her discovery. Unfortunately, it was not her on-command blush trick, so she couldn't make it go away.

Pinkie appeared to not notice. She just smiled widely and waved at her.

Twilight felt alleviated at Pinkie's unaltered behavior. A quiet sigh of relief escaped her, which made Fluttershy come over and ask if she was all right. After assuring Fluttershy she was fine, Rarity announced they had arrived at the spa.

"We're here! Just you wait, girls, a few minutes in here with the girls here, and you'll feel like a whole new you!" Rarity excitedly told them.

"Wut's wrong wit' tah old me?" Applejack asked suspiciously.

"Yeah." Dash agreed, ego showing like a firefly amidst a bushel of nuts. "You can't seriously tell me you can improve me."

"It's a figure of speech." Rarity informed them through gritted teeth, trying to get them to drop the subject.

"Ooh!" Pinkie exclaimed. "Is that anything like a Bigure'de'Peech?"

" . . . A what?"

"A Bigure'de'Peech is an old candy treat that's been handed down over a few dozen decades." Twilight answered before she could realize what she was doing, her intimate knowledge of variety of facts overriding her uneasiness around Pinkie Pie. "I wouldn't be surprised if Sugarcube Corner makes it, and no, Pinkie, it's nothing like a figure of speech."

"Oh . . . okay then!"

Rarity put a hoof over her forehead. "Can we please just go into the spa now?"

Everypony nodded, apologized, and asked Rarity to lead the way. They followed behind quietly as she entered the spa doors. The inside of the building was much more serene than the outside. If it wasn't for the sign, the spa's outside would've been dismissible as any ol' building, but the inside was bluish-white, with towels and therapy supplies neatly strewn about in way that yelped 'come here when you're tense and need to unwind!'

"Rarity!" The blue-maned, blue-eyed, pink-coated pony with a eyeliner-heavy eyes and a white headband with a red dot on it greeted. "What can we do today for one of our most well-paying customers?" She gasped at the sight of Fluttershy. "Oh, and you brought Fluttershy with you! How lovely!"

Rarity chuckled. "On the contrary, I've brought all my friends. I request an individual session for each!"

"An individual . . . session . . . for each?" The clerk stuttered. The reason for her awe became clear as dollar signs appeared in her eyes. She shook her head to rid the signs from her eyes and cleared her throat. "Are you certain you have the bits to pay that, Miss Rarity?"

"Of course I am!" Rarity confidently told her. "I would never be so crass to ask for something I can't afford!"

(Presumably, this doesn't apply to Hearth's Warming Eve season.)

"Right, right . . ." The clerk said, then walked around the counter over to make a headcount. "You!" She pointed to Spike. "Come with me. We have unique methods of treating your kind."

Her wording made Twilight, Fluttershy and Spike all worry, but it was Spike who asked "W-what do you mean?"

"You're a dragon!" The clerk said rather obviously. "Ponies enjoy having their hooves pampered, dipping in hot water and a good masseuse! On dragons, that sort of thing just won't do, so we have a reserve area where pets like yourself can dip into fresh-brewed magma, get those loose scales leftover from last molting seasons off and their claws sharpened!"

The three of them all relaxed, and Spike appeared to become intrigued.

"I do have a problem with leftover scales . . ."

The clerk pony guided him over to a entrance to another room. After Spike entered, the clerk came back for them and guided one by one to other rooms, each time telling them a masseuse would arrive for them shortly.

The room Twilight got was a simple room with two massage tables and a bowl of water resting over on a non-massage table for . . . some spa reason Twilight didn't know of.

Lacking a proper manual for the conduct she should be taking, Twilight climbed onto the massage table and lied on it.

Nothing happened for longer than Twilight felt comfortable with. Anypony could come into the room, do something . . . untowards and the acoustics wouldn't be enough to get her cries for help outside the room.

Nothing happened for longer than Twilight felt comfortable with. Anypony could come into the room, do something . . . untowards and the acoustics wouldn't be enough to get her cries for help outside the room.

Nothing happened for longer than Twilight felt comfortable with. Anypony could come into the room, do something . . . untowards and the acoustics wouldn't be enough to get her cries for help outside the room.

"GYA!" Twilight screamed, unable to bear it any longer. She knew she probably shouldn't do what she was about to do, but she needed to hear something- a noise, a squeak, some music on the radio . . . but as she didn't see anything of the sort, she was just going to use her magic to blast something to smithereens. It would've cost her some repute, and more than a few bits to place whatever in the room was going to be damaged by it, but she decided it was better the room than her mind.

For something Twilight would be forever grateful to her for, a spa pony just like the clerk came into the room before she could get a spell off, the click of the doorknob finally made a blasted sound.

"Hoo!" Twilight exclaimed. "Thank goodness you came when you did! The room was so quiet I was about to blast something just to make noise!"

The masseuse giggled. It sounded familiar. "You couldn't have just clapped your hooves together?"

Twilight stared at the masseuse. Unbridled embarrassment overcame her thinking, preventing any other response. That was not only a logical suggestion, as the room probably would've echoed the clap, but it also wouldn't end with her paying a fine, fine.

". . . I didn't think of that."

The masseuse giggled again. "For such a smart pony, you sure seem to not think about the little things! Now, can you stretch your limbs out for me?"

Twilight was befuddled by the request, but she figured it must've had something to do with a spa treatment, so she obliged, splaying her legs out all across the table in different directions.

The masseuse grabbed her front left leg, putting one hoof on hers and one hoof on Twilight's shoulder-equivalent area. The masseuse squeezed them together, causing her shoulder-equivalent area to pop -PAINFULLY. VERY, VERY PAINFULLY.

But after a moment, the pain subsided, and Twilight's leg was overcome with a relaxing sensation so good, so good, that she couldn't keep herself from moaning slightly.

The masseuse giggled. Twilight was starting to wonder about her. Why did she keep giggling, and why did it sound so familiar?

"You sound like you liked that!" The masseuse exclaimed after Twilight's short moans came to a quiet stop. "Don't worry, we still have three legs to go before we're done!"

Another three more pops, another three more moments of PAIN PAIN OH CELESTIA THE PAIN, another three series of quiet little moans ensued.

"All righty, now that we're done with that, let's do this!" The masseuse began massaging Twilight's back with an extremely sensitive caress. It felt amazingly good. Amazingly. Amazing . . . Divine, even.

Twilight did a record-first and cursed the fact she had to report to Celestia regularly, for it was the first thing that came to mind when the librarian thought of a reason why she would eventually to have leave the spa . . . leave this- this chamber of pleasure. The masseuse was so soft and delicate that Twilight was certain the masseuse could rip her horn straight out of her head and be so gentle that she wouldn't have minded.

The doorknob clicked open, taking the both of them by surprise. A fuchsia Earth pony with a teal green mane stepped into the room.

"Sorry 'bout the wait, darlin'." She said."I had to-huh?" She saw the masseuse working on Twilight, with Twilight and the masseuse looking right back.

"Eeesh!" The fuchsia pony exclaimed. "I know the boss has a dress code, but don't you think you're takin' it a little far making yerself look exactly like her? Who are you, anyhoo?"

The masseuse that had been working on Twilight for the last few minutes grabbed at her mane . . . then proceeded to yank it straight off, revealing not only a wig, but a mane beneath that was bouncy and curly like a scoop of cotton candy.

"Pinkie!?" Twilight exclaimed. "What-what are you doing?"

"I, uh . . ." Pinkie was abnormally quiet as she plucked the wig for her tail off. "I could tell you reeeeeeally didn't like when I shocked you with the joy buzzer earlier, and I felt bad about it."

"So you impersonated a masseuse to massage me to make up for it!?"

". . . Uh, yeah?"

Twilight sat there with eyes open and jaw dropped at the depth of Pinkie's insanity. (Not that she was one to talk . . .)

. . . Of course, in retrospect, the masseuse having been Pinkie Pie all along would explain why Twilight turned into a gushy, mushy . . . mushy-mushy-mush-mush at her touch.

"Um . . . this is a weird way of apologizing. Pinkie, but I . . ." Twilight put her hoof on Pinkie's cheek to comfort her, but touching Pinkie made Twilight lose her train of thought. She rubbed Pinkie's cheek.

"You what, Twilight?"

Twilight shirked away, embarrassed that she would forget to say something to Pinkie in favor of touching her. "I forgive you! Yes, forgive! That's it. That's the word I was trying to say."

"Not this isn't all very touchin'. . ." The fuchsia pony interrupted. "But I need to know how this affects my pay. I'm paid per customer, you know!"

Twilight and Pinkie looked at each other for an answer. Twilight fiddled her hooves together, lacking an appropriate response of any sort. Pinkie Pie, quite clearly sensing her discomfort, wrapped a leg around her neck.

"We'll just quietly slip out of here and just say you did all the work."

The fuchsia pony seemed to not like this idea. "Are ya sure? That seems dishonest . . ."

Twilight and Pinkie looked at each other again. Before Twilight could say anything, Pinkie stepped forward.

"You know what? You're right. I'll just talk to your boss and explain what happened."

The fuchsia pony bowed her head. "Thank you."

Pinkie followed the real masseuse out of the room, leaving Twilight alone. Twilight decided she should go ahead and leave the spa. On her way out, Twilight swung by the clerk's and asked her friends be told where she went. After the clerk affirmed she would, Twilight stepped outside to come face-to-face with her namesake. A twilight sky swept the land above the spa.

"Wow," Twilight thought to herself. "Is it that late already?"

With this knowledge passed into her mind, Twilight swung back into the spa and asked the clerk to ask a friend to walk Spike home. A young dragon like him had no business being out and about as late as night as it would be by the time he was done with whatever he picked out the spa's treatment.

Twilight galloped her way from the spa back to the sanctuary of her treehouse library, 'cheating' by teleporting to get there faster.

Once inside, she locked the door behind herself and cleared the desk of her library, ready to read a book . . . before remembering that the last time she did that, she fell asleep and had a very painful dream that came true in a weird way, so she decided to go ahead and start on Spike's and her's dinner.

Blue flame beneath the cold steel of the pot she started, Twilight was content, worrying more about whether nor Spike would like her recipe more then anything else at the moment.

A knock came onto the door to the library that Twilight could hear even all the way in from the kitchen. Lowering the pot's flame with her magic so that it wouldn't boil before she ready, she made her to the door and opened it to meet an Earth pony with a flowery mane and coat like picked plums.

"H-hello." Twilight greeted at the stranger in her library, who was visiting so late at night. "Can I help you?"

"Oh no no no, I'm here to help you!" The Earth pony told answered. "You are Twilight Sparkle, are you not?"

"Y-yeah." Twilight answered nervously. She didn't like ponies knowing her name before she introduced herself.

"Cheerilee. May I come in?"

OH! Cheerilee! The Ponyville teacher Applejack said would be visiting in the evening! That made Twilight feel . . . a little better.

"Yeah, sure!" Twilight moved out of the door to allow her entry. "I'm getting to work on dinner. Will you be staying?"

"Oh, no. Thank you. I'll help you make it if you'd like, though."

That caught Twilight off-guard. An assistant, even a temporary one, that wasn't Spike or Owlowiscious? How strange, but Twilight welcomed her assist. Additionally, it would be an excellent way to get Cheerilee somewhere where Twilight could question her.

After leading Cheerilee into the kitchen and setting her to work cutting vegetables (something Cheerilee found confusing due to Twilight's unicorn status.) and setting the flame back up, Twilight felt ready to drop the question on her mind.

"Soo, Cheerilee . . . Applejack told me you'd be visiting, and I get the feeling you didn't come all this way just to help make a dinner you're not going to eat."

Cheerilee scoffed. "Oh, that Applejack! She's just terrible at keeping secrets, isn't she?"

"Hmmp." Twilight replied. Applejack's unfitness as a secret-keeper was not the issue at hoof. "Why are you visiting, Cheerilee?"

"Oh, see . . . " Cheerilee said, waving the knife in her hoof. "Your week is about to start!"

To Twilight, that just made more questions then answers. Her week? Since when did she have a week? What does that even mean?

At Twilight's understandably confused expression, Cheerilee elaborated. "See, you're the newest pony to move into Ponyville, and the last pony to have moved in- that's me- helps the next pony who does- that's you with preparing for their week!

"What is my 'week'!?" Twilight demanded harshly. She was starting to get really frustrated at all these riddles and hoops everypony seemed intent on putting her through!

"Oh! It's a week where Pinkie Pie takes time out of her schedule to spend the next 24/7 exclusively with Ponyville's newest arrival!"

. . .

. . .

. . .

"Um, Twilight?" Cheerilee asked. "Are you okay?"

. . .

. . .

. . .

No.
> Evolutionary Scale
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

After a few gentle shakes, Cheerilee was able to bring Twilight out of her daze. Cheerilee's inquires as to just what was wrong fell on deaf ears.

"N-nothing! Nothing's wrong, okay?"

"You sure?" Cheerilee pointed her muzzle upwards. "One of the problems my students have a lot is not telling somepony about their problem."

Twilight shook her head. "You . . . you can't really help with it, Cheerilee . . . can we just focus on dinner, please?"

Cheerilee seemed to agreed, but as she resumed chopping vegetables, she started explaining just how she was supposed to help Twilight get ready for her 'week'. Apparently she was going to fetch a copy of Twilight's schedule, mostly in part so that Pinkie could know not to do her randomly appearing out of nowhere trick during something sensitive, like an interview with an very important pony.

Giving Cheerilee her schedule to give to Pinkie so Pinkie could know when she could appear and when she needed to disappear? That got Twilight thinking...maybe, instead of just appearing randomly the way she does, Pinkie actually had a complicated network of manipulation that she used to know who would be where at what time, and be able to position herself in such a way that she would able to surprise her friends just as they were about to access something.

. . . No, no, that's silly. Pinkie Pie didn't have the patience or control for a facade like that. Then again, Twilight had been putting a rather good facade lately herself . . . perhaps she's underestimating Pinkie...

Oh no . . . what if Pinkie's hypothetical spy network had seen Twilight in her weaker moments? What if Pinkie already knew about the . . . thoughts Twilight had been having about her?

"Cheerilee?" Twilight asked.

"Uh-huh?" Cheerilee gave Twilight as much attention as she could while also focusing on the pot on the stove.

"Has Pinkie Pie . . . said anything about me?"

Cheerilee was confused by the question. "What do you mean?"

"I mean . . . you know, has she said something . . . about the how she thinks I think of her?"

Cheerilee still seemed confused, but she appeared to have a better grasp of what Twilight meant. "Oh, sure! She says you're really nerdy and you sometimes get really frustrated by the way she does things, but that's only because you're still new around here."

Twilight relaxed internally slightly. Nothing about her developing l . . . lo . . . whatever it was.

After taking a wooden spoon to the stew they had been making, Twilight declared the dinner was done. She offered Cheerilee a bowl to take some home for her lunch tomorrow or something, but the teacher said she had that taken care of.

Shortly after Cheerilee politely departed her abode, there was another knock that Twilight found was Fluttershy with Spike in tow. She evidently been the one to take the offer up. She also started apologizing profusely about the mess with the picnic today. She was talking really fastly, too.

"-Because if I hadn't let the snail crawl on my head then Rarity wouldn't have to use the bucket and if Rarity hadn't had to use the bucket-"

"Fluttershy!" Twilight exclaimed. "It's okay. Really, Honestly. It's fine. Go home and be with your animal friends."

"All right . . . if you say so . . ." Fluttershy quietly nodded and headed elsewhere, departing from the door frame.

Twilight led Spike to the dinner table, where he initially refused to eat the stew because it 'smelled funny'. Twilight, in a playful mood, shoved a spoonful of the stuff into his mouth anyway.

He subsequently had a whole bowl.

After filling themselves up on the stew, both librarian and assistant prepared for bed, brushing their teeth and flossing. (Spike, due to his being a dragon, always needed a little help getting those rear molars.) said their good nights and tucked into their respective beds.



Twilight stood there in her dream void. After what happened with the DJ, the lights in the floor and Pinkie's joy buzzer, she wasn't as enthusiastic about seeing what her little world had in store for her today.

There was a counter, like those found in candy shops and cafes. It looked innocent enough . . . Twilight, not really wanting to see what happened next, but knowing her dream wasn't going to progress any if she didn't do something, walked up to it.

Pondering to herself as rested her hooves on the counter, Twilight noticed she seemed to not be able to control her void as much as she used to . . .

-and what better to illustrate this point than a pony Twilight knew she hadn't summoned poking her shoulder to get her attention?

She turned away from the counter to see a long-limbed, rather pretty pony- in fact. Its hooves ended in tips and its face had a perfection to it a normal pony couldn't have. Of course, it wasn't a normal pony. It was one of Rarity's mannequins! Normal the mannequins didn't have eyes or a mouth, but this one did, expertly carved into its face with the skill of an artisan.

The mannequin, seeing it had Twilight's attention, shyly raised its front hooves. It looked like it needed a hug, and some comforting.

Twilight, smiling sympathetically at the mannequin's uncertain expression, offered her front hooves to it. it stayed still, like it was auditioning for the role of 'Fluttershy' in a play, and experimenting in its efforts to get the character.

Twilight shook her head, bemused, and wrapped the mannequin into a big hug. The mannequin's neck arched over, still uncertain. Twilight rolled her eyes and giggled. To assure it everything was okay, she wrapped her neck around its and cuddled it. After doing this, She gave a reassuring smile. it did the trick, as the mannequin seemed comfortable enough to act freely.

It put its hooves on her chest . . . pushed her down against the counter and started kissing her! Really passionately, too. Twilight might've not been as welcoming to it if she knew it was going to do this!

She vainly attempted to push it off, kicking her front hooves into its chest, but even though they made a solid thud, it actually hurt her more than it. What were these things made of, anyways!? Grunting in protest, Twilight tried a different approach and kicked it the stomach with her free hind leg. That didn't do much either.

As the mannequin began stroking her mane, Twilight finally resigned herself to it. Once she had quit resisting, she found the mannequin was a fairly good kisser, just barely getting to the point it needed to make her moan . . . of course it was good. After all, why wouldn't it be!?

Eventually the mannequin pulled its tongue out of her mouth and rested its head against her shoulders. Twilight, having resigned herself to her fate, started stroking its mane. Something poked her in the shoulder. She made a grunt to let it know she wasn't going to tolerate being poked.

It poked her again.

She grunted again.

It seemed to stop . . . but it poked her again.

"STOP THAT!"

"Whoa, geez, okay!"




Twilight's eyes shot open. Her front hooves were raised in the air and out from her blanket like she was attempting to . . . stroke somepony's mane. A quick glance around showed Spike with his claws raised defensively, standing on the side of the bed.

"You were doing something weird with your hooves, so I tried to poke you awake." Spike explained. "Did you have a bad dream?"

Twilight pulled the covers of her bed up, kneading them at the corner. "You might say that..."

Spike nodded. "Uh-huh. Well, breakfast is done."

Breakfast is done!? Already!? How long had that dream took?

Twilight waved Spike off. "You go ahead without me, Spike. I need a minute to myself."

"O...kay." Spike was concerned, no doubt, but he went on ahead down the stairs.

Twilight had meant she needed a minute to herself- she did, really, to think about her dream...now awake and thinking, Twilight was worried...was she going to do to Pinkie what the mannequin did to her? But before she could worry about that too much, she had to make sure she was giving the response ponies expected her to be giving.

"Pinkie." Twilight said authoritatively. "I know you're in here somewhere. Come out."

The room remained silent, but Twilight knew better. She could sense Pinkie Pie in here, somewhere, wound up like a tight spring waiting to be sprung. Throwing the covers aside, Twilight set about the room in search of Pinkie. A quick duck showed she wasn't under the bed. A spell showed she wasn't hiding in the rafters either.

"Hmm..." Twilight turned around the room and start looking for any other hiding places Pinkie might have. The drawers, perhaps?

Twilight made her way to the drawer and pulled it open, only to see absolutely nothing in there except what she had put in herself.

"SURPRISE!"

"DAH!" Twilight was indeed surprised and scrambled to turn around as she fell off her hooves. Her tail acted on reflex, instantly shooting outward and coiling around the nearest object...which happened to be Pinkie's neck, causing Pinkie to be pulled towards Twilight while Twilight was on her back against the drawers.

"Ooooh!" Pinkie exclaimed. "I got you good, didn't I?"

Twilight rolled her eyes. "Yes, Pinkie. You certainly did."

Twilight examined the abnormal positions they had worked themselves into. Pinkie Pie was wrapped up in her tail...oh, how easy it would be to fling Pinkie against the bed, use her magic to block all the entrances, and have her way right then and there...

No, no, no. Twilight wasn't the type to take what she wanted. She worked hard and earned it, which made ponies more then willing to just give it to her.

With some difficultly due to her reluctance to let Pinkie go, Twilight managed to uncoil her tail from her.

Twilight initiated conversation. "So, Pinkie Pie...I've been informed that today is apparently the start of my...week?"

"Yup!" Pinkie answered cheerfully. "Your celebratory week for coming to Ponyville!" Pinkie got a suspicious look on her face. "Cheerilee told you, right...not Applejack?"

Twilight rolled her eyes. "No, Pinkie Pie, Applejack didn't say anything except that I should expect Cheerilee to visit."

"Good!" Pinkie perked up. It still wasn't clear to Twilight what was going on between Applejack and Pinkie, but she figured it probably had something to do with Applejack ruining the surprise for past ponies getting their celebratory weeks.

"Would you like some breakfast, Pinkie?"

"No thanks! Already ate."

"Hmm."

Twilight and Pinkie made their way down the stairs to the kitchen, where Spike was slowly eating a bowl of fresh oatmeal- made from scratch, Twilight could tell. Ah, that was on Spike's best traits as far as breakfast went- he always went that extra mile.

After eating, Spike pulled out something he dreaded, but Twilight adored- a scroll with a checklist on it.

"Twilight, don't forget you have a doctor's appointment today!"

A doctor's appointment...well, personally, Twilight didn't think it would be just sooo unbearable to have Pinkie around for that...but some other ponies might, given Pinkie's volume and the normal quiet of the doctor's waiting room.

"Oooh!" Pinkie groaned. "A doctor's appointment? That's a terrible way to start off your celebratory week, Twilight!"

Twilight smiled apologetically. "Sorry, Pinkie. Gotta make sure I'm taking care of my internal systems properly."

There was some time to pass before they had to actually go there, so Pinkie was keen on the idea of playing a game to pass the time.

Twilight's head gears came to a . . . head against each other. On one hoof, Pinkie enjoyed playing games . . . on the other, they could get so lost in the fun they could run late.

Twilight didn't want to run late. She also didn't want to disappoint Pinkie Pie . . . Eehh. Ah. Eeegh. Agh. Eeeennnnn . . .

Twilight's mind kept at this for a while, until she realized that in a weird way, giving into her desire for Pinkie would mean she wasn't exercising enough control over herself. Control. Gotta stay in control.

"I'm sorry, Pinkie, but playing a game would make us late."

BLEEEEEECH.

"I'm sorry, Pinkie." that was a phrase Twilight really, really didn't want to hear come of her mouth. Ever.

"Oh...all right! Can we least skip our way over there?"

Twilight could at least give her that.

"Sure!"

So they did, skipping their out of the library door and into Ponyville's well-traveled roads, much to the confusion of everypony more familiar with Twilight's attitude for nonsense like skipping.

After a huge total square area of grass had been distinctly flattened by the bend in their legs, Twilight and Pinkie arrived at the clinic, a boxy building made of dark blue bricks. Before they entered the door, Twilight tried to stress to Pinkie the need for silence.

"Pinkie, I need you to know that once we're inside, you'll need to be quiet, okay? Some ponies don't like a whole lot of noise before they get inspected."

Pinkie whinnied sadly. Were it up to Twilight, she would've just told Pinkie she could do whatever she pleased...but it wasn't up to her.

Twilight took in a deep breath and pushed the door open. Entering the stone-colored building, the sign-in attendant looked up through the glass window that was found in all doctor's buildings, having caught wind of Twilight's entry through the bell. She seemed visible distraught when Pinkie entered in behind Twilight.

Twilight did her best to push through the discomfort and proceed with business as normal. With her magic, she wrote her name on the clipboard and took an empty seat, making sure another seat next to her was empty so Pinkie could sit next to her. There was a medium amount of other ponies waiting their turn, a few of which were little foals, who may or may not have been the actual recipient of the appointment.

It quickly proved unnecessary, as Pinkie had caught sight of a table filled with small, simple toys meant to entertain said foals, too young to understand anything beyond 'bored' and 'not bored'. Pinkie zoomed in over and attempted to join before Twilight could stop her.

Twilight squinted her eyes. Pinkie was a wonderful friend, great party-thrower and fabulous baker, but with the way she was, Twilight was certain she'd be able to hear the sounds of concerned parents, lecturing Pinkie on giving their foals bad lessons.

A gentle tap on Twilight's shoulders forced her to open her vision earlier then she had anticipated. The pony who wanted her attention was a light gray pony with a combed mane and half-moon glasses.

"Hello." She pointed to Pinkie Pie. "Is that your...oversized daughter?"

Oh. Hahahaha! She thought Pinkie was her oversized daughter!? That's ridiculous to the point of hilarity.

. . . Of course, looking at Pinkie's behavior, it was easy to see why a pony would think she was somepony's daughter.

"No, no." Twilight shook her head. "She's my friend, and an adult, but I can see why you would think that..."

The gray mare nodded. "I see." She looked at Pinkie. "She's a very good friend, isn't she?"

"One of my best." Twilight answered. Then it occurred to her that this lady didn't seem...concerned about Pinkie in the way Twilight had anticipated.

Twilight didn't like when things didn't happen the way she had anticipated.

"Why do you ask?" She asked the mare.

"Oh, it's just . . . my son's such a shy little colt, and she seems to bet getting him to open up some more."

Taking another, closer look at the play area, Twilight could see that there was indeed a little colt that bore a resembled to the mare next to her, who was playing with Pinkie and another brown-coated colt his age.

What Twilight found most amazing was . . . Pinkie was playing with them quietly.

She really was full of surprises.

"I wanted to show my appreciation somehow." The mare said. "Pass along a thank you for me, please?"

Twilight smiled and nodded.

After the mare got up and left, the assistant open a door into the next room and called her name. Twilight tippedhooved over and pushed on Pinkie's shoulders lightly to get her attention. Pinkie turned her head around, confused. Twilight pointed at the assistant waiting at the open door. Pinkie's mouth made an 'o' in understanding. She got up and accompanied Twilight and the assistant to a patient's room, which was decorated in cool, calming colors except for the white tile floor.

"The doctor will be with you shortly." The assistant informed, then closed the door on them, leaving them alone.

Twilight crawled her way up to the bed.

Pinkie's darted for the wheeled stool, meant for the doctor's usage. Some ponies were mischievous -or ill-advised- enough to let their kids ride on it, so long as the kids were quick enough on the draw to make it look untouched before the doctor arrived.

"Can I ride on the stool, Twilight?"

Twilight raised an eyebrow, but at herself, not Pinkie.

Hmmm . . . how to go about this . . . it's not like Pinkie could actually hurt somepony riding around on the stool, was it? But still, it was immature and childish . . . immature and childish . . . immature and childish . . . childish. . . child . . . ish.

"Um, actually, Pinkie . . ." Twilight said nervously, kicking her hoof to further sell the illusion. "I always get nervous waiting for the doctor. W-would you hold my hoof, please?"

That was a fib if there ever was one, but it did its purpose well: give Pinkie something to do and bring Pinkie closer to her.

"Oh." Pinkie said plainly. "Sure!"

Pinkie happily wrapped the hoof Twilight offered with her own. Twilight started shivering internally. Twilight held it tighter, wanting to be absolutely certain Pinkie couldn't let go. Her hunger for the Pinkie's colors were starting to override her better judgement. Pinkie wouldn't just let go like that.

Twilight pulled Pinkie's hoof, and by extension, Pinkie herself, closer. Come closer, Pinkie Pie . . . just . . . come closer. Come now, darling . . .

Twilight shook her head, recalling her experience with the mannequin. It would be nice to do that to Pinkie, but- what her friends say? They'd probably yell at her for coming on to poor Pinkie Pie like that!

The door rattled open, revealing a greenish-coated pony with an orange mane shaped like a muffin. "All right, Twilight Sparkle. Have you been taking care of yourself properly?"

"Ehheh! That's what I'm here to find out, doc!"

Twilight relaxed the tension in her hoof and slipped it away from Pinkie. Pinkie politely sat down in the waiting chair while the doctor began running his test.

"All right . . ." The doctor reached into his coat and pulled a tool that he stuck into Twilight's ear. "Can you hear anything, Miss Sparkle?"

"I hear a high-pitched buzz."

"Good!" The doctor took the tool away from her ear. "Say 'ahh' for me.'

"Ahh."

The doctor put a popsicle stick on her tongue. "Now say it again."

"Ahh."

"Good." The doctor removed the stick, then pulled out a flashlight which he turned on. "Now, follow the light." The doctor began slowly moving the flash light through the air.

Pinkie, in her perpetual quest for amusement, rolled in on herself and started gnawing on the tip of her tail. Twilight watched it raptly. She wondered whether or not having her tail gnawed on by another pony might produce any stimulating response.

"Twilight, I need you focus on the light." The doctor reminded her.

"Huh? Oh, um, yeah. Sorry." Twilight apologized. "Can we start over?"

The doctor nodded, and moved the flashlight back into position. This time around went a lot better.

"All right. You seem good to go, Miss Sparkle. Have a nice day."

"You too, doctor."

The doctor opened the door for them, and Twilight hopped off the exam bed.

Well, Twilight noted to herself. At least that much had passed by without incident.

Making their way back to the receptionist room, Twilight signed herself out and left the building.

As she and Pinkie were exiting, Twilight recalled what the mare had asked her to do.

"Oh, hey Pinkie? There was a pony in there that was the mother of a colt you played with."

"Yeah-huh?" Pinkie said, paying rapt attention while bouncing on her tail like a spring.

"She said her son was shy, and you got him to open up. She wanted me to tell you thank you for doing that."

"She's welcome- whaaaoooo!" Pinkie lost her balance and started flailing through the air, trying to regain her balance.

Twilight, thinking quickly, rushed over and raised her front hooves, catching Pinkie in them like a knight in shining armor saving his princess from the dragon's collapsing tower.

"Thanks!" Pinkie exclaimed. "But I, um, wouldn't have minded falling, Twilight."

Twilight rolled her eyes, then looked at Pinkie, cradled in her hooves.

Ooooh...this day had really been testing her resolve. First in her own bedroom -her own bedroom- and now this!

Twilight's eye twitched.

Stay in control, Twilight. Just stay in control.

Of course, thinking back, yes, Pinkie had electrocuted her with the -in her opinion, mislabeled- joy buzzer...but she had gotten an incredible message from Pinkie before the day had ended.

Taking the plunge, Twilight closed her eyes and pulled her front hooves inward, where Pinkie's mouth would meet hers...

And then Twilight's lips smushed against...something that wasn't Pinkie. Opening her eyes unveiled that it was her own hooves- Pinkie having already picked herself up and began the skipping trek back towards the library, having not realized Twilight wasn't behind her.

She did a second later, though, as she turned around and looked at Twilight confusedly. "You coming?"

"Yeah, yeah." Twilight assured her. "Just...got distracted." Twilight noticed the exact pattern of where Pinkie's hooves had landed on the grass.

"Pinkie, why are you avoiding where we already skipped? Couldn't we just follow the grass back home?"

"Because then not all of the grass will be trampled evenly!" Pinkie exclaimed. "What if it thinks we're singling them out?"

Twilight knew better then to tell Pinkie grass couldn't think, so she shook her head and pressed on, skipping along with Pinkie back to the library, taking care to trample untrampled grass so it wouldn't feel 'singled out'.

After getting back to the library, Pinkie brought up something that really tested Twilight's resolved and control.

"Hey, Twilight? Where am I going to sleep until the end of your week?"

Sleep!?

"Sleep!? Pinkie, why can't you just sleep at Sugercube Corner!?"

"Cause it's your week, Twilight!" Pinkie answered like this was the most obvious thing in the world. "That means I'm spending the next 24/7 with you, not the next 23/7, not the next 20/7, not the next 16/7, TWENTY-FOUR...SEVEN. All right?"

"Right..." Twilight muttered and lowered her head. She should've been expecting that, after what Cheerilee had told her. Oi.

"I know!" Spike spoke up, clearly eager to be helpful. "Pinkie can sleep in my basket while I sleep in Twilight...at least until tomorrow."

Twilight pursed her lips. She could have Pinkie sleep with her in her bed instead...wouldn't that be nice? They could wake up in the morning, roll around, accidentally wrap the other one up in their arm, er, front leg...look at each others facial features just a little closer...

Twilight shook her head. "Actually, if we're going to do that, why don't we"

Twilight wasn't sure she had planned to say, which was unusual in itself. Twilight always had planned things out beforehand. But what instead came out of her mouth was-

"-Just all sleep together?"

"Oooh!" Pinkie exclaimed. "That's a great idea! It'll be like a sleepover! Which, you know, it kind is, in a way, isn't it!?"

Spike didn't share her enthusiasm. "Is the bed even big enough for all of us?"

"Yeah!" Twilight assured him. Pinkie and herself lying next to each other, with Spike curled up and piled on top of them...Twilight was agreeing with Pinkie: This was a great idea. Her want to pull Pinkie closer and closer would conflict with her unwillingness to push or shove her number one assistant, and the internal efforts within herself to reconcile the two would leave her body motionless, giving the impression she wasn't mentally all smashed up to anypony looking at her.

After having lunch, dinner, and doing some maintenance work around the library that Pinkie tried to help with it- really, she did, but she just- it- agggh...Pinkie!

Moving on...Twilight Sparkle, Pinkie Pie, and Spike all got ready for bed. The one single bed she would soon be sharing with both of them.

After saying their good nights, they all piled in, just the way Twilight had planned and expected them to- herself and Pinkie on either side and Spike nestled on top of their combined mass. He looked surprisingly comfortable.

"Good night, Pinkie Pie."

"You already told me good night, Twi-lii-awwwwn..." Pinkie attempted to protest, but the sandmare had come for her and Spike already. Twilight signed over the fact that she been left out of the list of victims.

Rolling about in bed as much as she could without disturbing either of her bedfellows, Twilight started to worry.

Last time, her dream came true in a weird prophetic fashion. The dream she had this morning hadn't quite come true the same way her last one had- not enough similarities between the actions the mannequin took and the actions she took, which meant the dream hadn't come quite nearly as true. Compare being shocked to making out with Pinkie. Or even somepony at all. She hadn't made out/been made out with today, which meant the dream hadn't come true...

And that was even more frightening than if it had.
> Below Zero
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

Twilight was apprehensive, standing in her void. After all that had happened, she didn't think she had lost control of it.

She knew she had. Why she had still eluded her, though. Had keeping her control around Pinkie in the real world took so much effort and willpower that it had cost her ability to manipulate her own dreams and fantasies? That would've been awful, as she had barely kept herself in check yesterday, nearly pulling Pinkie into herself after unnecessarily saving the girl from a fall.

In the void, Twilight heard water running. There was a waterfall up ahead leading into a pond. She approached the pond and lowered her neck to look at her reflection in the water. The water rippled with seemingly nothing around to make it move.

Twilight a got a tinge in the base of her tail. There was something in the water she didn't want to have- or something to be done in the water she didn't want to do. The point was, she didn't want anything to do with it.

She turned around to get away, but the instant she took her third step from it, she heard something splash out of the water...and felt it wrap around her hind hoof.

Twilight grunted and tried to jerk her hoof free, to pull it our grasp, but whatever grabbed a tight, firm - yet surprisingly gentle grip on her hoof. It started pulling. Pulling her. Pulling her towards the water.

Twilight renewed her struggling, but whatever was pulling her wasn't going to let go easily. Twilight was pulled to her knees by the tugging. She flailed and scrambled about, trying to grab something to pull her back away from the water.

"Eeeehhhhheen!"

It pulled her under under the water's surface, a ripple blew out as her body was submerged into the chilling water...

The strangest thing was...the water was practically ice...sub-zero temperatures that no pony -and quite a few other creatures shouldn't have been able to stand, let alone survive...but it felt so nice, chill on her stressed psyche.

The water started filling her vision...



Twilight groaned awake. Opening her eyes, she found her a pink wall to be the only thing she could see. Her nose was pressed up against it and huffing out hot air, which bounced off the wall and swam around her nostrils.

With a start, Twilight realized that pink wall was the back of Pinkie's neck. She whimpered, fearful of what she might have done to Spike in her slumber in order to bring Pinkie closer. When she tried to get up to look around the room, her worries were put to rest. Replaced by an infuriation that she had foiled her own brilliance:

Rather then shoving Spike off to get to Pinkie, Twilight had shoveled her nose under him to put her nose up against the back of Pinkie's neck.

Twilight had to squirm just ever so slightly over and over until she could get herself out from both her bed-buddies without disturbing them. Once free, she rolled over on her side of the bed. What time was it? A quick glance at the window suggested it was still night.

Twilight signed and tried to get back to sleep. Or at least something resembling it closely enough to keep Spike from worrying when he woke up.

Twilight's tightly-wounded, impossibly precise internal sense of time said it was within the range to two, three hours before Pinkie and Spike woke up and did their morning business.

Pinkie's first thing to do before anything else however, was to float herself up to the ceiling and come crashing down on the bed, jettisoning Twilight off it to the floor to wake her up. Unsuccessfully to 'wake her up', rather, as she was already awake.

"Pinkie!" Twilight yelled. "Was that really necessary!?"

"Of course!" Pinkie said. "I had to be sure you were up for day number two, silly!"

Twilight shook her head and got off the floor. Pinkie's mannerisms were annoying and childish, but Twilight lov-... was forgiving to her enough to get past it. After, if she couldn't stand being near her, how was Twilight supposed to pull Pinkie close and lavish the baker with her...what were they, anyhow? Affections? Let's go with that. Pending a better word of course.

"The schedule Cheerilee gave me didn't say you had anything to do today, Twilight!" Pinkie cheered, bouncing up on her tail like a spring. "So we can spend the whole day having fun!"

Twilight signed, preparing herself for the disgusting feeling about well up in her.

"I'm sorry, Pinkie..."

BLEEEEECH. There she went again! Ulllgghh...yuck. 'I'm sorry, Pinkie'... Twilight was starting become assured she was going to say that once a day through her Week!

"But something's come up. I need to schedule a visit with the psychiatrist."

"Psychiatrist?" Pinkie asked. "Twilight, are you going crazy?"

Twilight's eye twitched. Everything in her vision suddenly turned white, putting her in a-well, void. The white was on the floors, the walls, the ceiling. She didn't know why or what it was, just that...in it's emptiness, she felt alone.

And now that she felt alone...she felt comfortable screaming.

"I-AM-NOT-CRAZY!"

A distorted voice said something. It sounded like it was coming from a thousand miles away. Twilight's head spun around, disoriented.

The white began peeling like dried paint, slowly coming off the walls to reveal her bedroom. The floor cracked, then the whole walls just shattered apart like a priceless vase dropping off it's pedestal.

Once it had all gone, Twilight found herself back in her bedroom.

"I never said you were crazy, Twilight!" Pinkie's cheerfully reminded her. Of course... "I asked if you were going crazy!"

Spike came running up the stairs, throwing his claws on the door's arch for support. "I heard yelling! Is everything all right?"

"Of course everything's all right." Twilight told him. "Why wouldn't it be-"

...Oh. Twilight realized she must said her thoughts out loud.

The white void...her mind must have constructed it so she could feel comfortable screaming.

"Everything's hunky-dory!" Pinkie assured Spike. "Twilight just isn't crazy! Which I don't know how she knows that, but I trust her not to do something EVVVILL! Right, Twilight?"

Oooh...just 'be happy' and everything'll be okay, Pinkie. Twilight wanted to moan at her, but couldn't.

Twilight couldn't believe she had just nearly lost all of her control like that. That she screamed at Pinkie like that and didn't even realize it, but...but...BUT SHE WASN'T CRAZY!

"I'm sorry for yelling at you, Pinkie Pie." Twilight apologized. Funny. For all the disgust she had apologizing to Pinkie, she suddenly felt she couldn't it enough. "I'm sorry...I'm sorry..."

Pinkie scoffed. "Eesh, Twilight! I heard you the first time! What are you, a parrot?"

Maybe she is, but what she isn't is CRAZY!

Calm down, calm down...Pinkie never said she was crazy: Pinkie asked if she going crazy. Which, thinking about it, she just might've been...

"Come on." Twilight urged softly. "Let's eat breakfast so we can go."

Pinkie was proving co-operable this morning, going down the stairs with Twilight to eat the breakfast Spike had made. Unfortunately, Spike had given in to his dragon instincts, making some huge breakfast pastry that was loaded with sapphires baked into it- forcing Twilight and Pinkie to nibble around the gems. The little tiny bites were enough to feed them, however, and Twilight and Pinkie left with Spike in tow to go the psychiatrist office.

On their way by the road, they ran into a pumped Rainbow Dash.

"Hey, Pinkie Pie!" Dash yelled, approaching them. "I got a super-awesome cool new moves to try out, and I was wondering if you would be my test audience?"

Twilight boiled internally. How dare Rainbow Dash try to her Pinkie away from her?

...No, no-no-no-no, Pinkie wasn't Twilight's...possession to give at her leisure, she was her own individual pony! Twilight should be ashamed of herself for even thinking that! If she wanted to see Rainbow Dash's tricks, Twilight shouldn't try to keep her from it like an insecure mother keeping their child from trying out something new.

"Sorry, Dashie, I have to spend every day for the next week with Twilight so I can understand her better!"

"Yeah..." Twilight muttered. She had forgotten about that. "Didn't you have a Celebratory Week, Rainbow?"

"Nah." Dash said. "I was here in Ponyville before Pinkie moved in."

"Nuh-uh!" Pinkie said. "I was here before you were! You even had your own Week!"

Dash's hoof curled back. "No, Pinkie, I was here first and my week never happened!"

"So admit you there was a week!"

Aaag. Twilight's heart strings were being tugged in multiple directions. This was another situation she had to get just right. Rainbow and Pinkie were clearly disagreeing on something, and starting to get into the others face about it. She should do something, but what? And it had to be something that protected Pinkie while still keeping her friendship with Rainbow...but what would that be!

"There was no...week, Pinkie!"

"There WAS too a Week for you, Rainbow Dash!"

Twilight grimaced, practically caught in the middle. "Could you, um...girls, could we..." She mumbled quietly.

"There was NOT a week! You're probably thinking of some other pony!"

"Nnooooo...I'm thinking of you, and I know I am! I know everypony in Ponyville and when they came to it, so don't argue with me Dash!"

Twilight wanted to keep control. She really did. But when her own mind was indecisive, it was hard to keep control or think at all.

She broke down crying, falling to her knees. Her quiet sobs were just barely audible enough for Pinkie and Rainbow to notice. The sight of their friend in distress made them both forget everything and rush over to Twilight's aid, the two of them zooming to take up one of Twilight's side each.

"Twilight, what's wrong?" Rainbow asked. "Did somepony hit you when we weren't looking!?"

"Nooo..." Twilight whined. "I...you and Pinkie started fighting...and I wanted to make you stop, but I couldn't think of anything that I was sure wouldn't offend one of you!"

Rainbow Dash and Pinkie looked at each other, realizing the extent of their folly.

Pinkie gingerly tapped her hoof on Twilight's shoulder. "Hey. It's okay now, Twilight. We're not fighting now."

Dash seemed really apprehensive about something. "...Okay, Twilight? Yes, Pinkie gave me a Celebratory Week, just like you're having now. Something really embarrassing happened in the middle, so I always try to get ponies to think it never happened. I'm sorry, guys...I shouldn't have let my pride start a fight like that..."

"We forgive you!" Pinkie chipperly told her, then looked at Twilight. "Uh, don't we?"

Twilight giggled lightly. "Yes, Pinkie. We do."

Dash started backing away slightly, then rose into the air.

"Soo...you both up to see my tricks?"

"Can we come back to you later, Rainbow? We have somewhere to be." Twilight told her, getting up.

Dash was normally impatient with ponies coming back to her, but it was clear from her feathers she didn't want to do something to make Twilight cry again. "Yeah, sure. Whatever you want."

She flew away to do...whatever.

Twilight and Pinkie continued on to the local Ponyville therapist. The building was like the doctor's office, but smaller and a subdued red. The first room inside when they stepped through the door was a small room with chairs on the left or right walls, and the back wall had the desk register and the door into the therapist's actual office. There were three stallions sitting the chair, waiting for their turn. One stallion's eye seem caught on Pinkie. Twilight didn't notice.

Twilight went ahead and approached the clerk, Pinkie bouncing behind her.

The clerk was surprised to see her, Twilight having not been here before. "Hello. Do you have an appointment?"

Twilight shook her head. "No ma'am. I'm here to schedule one."

"Ah!" The clerk exclaimed, whipping out her pen. "What for?"

Good question. Twilight wanted to see a psych expert because she had been losing control of her void...and just today, she had found herself with a new, different void. What would that fall under?

"Strange dreams and illusions."

"Name?"

"Twilight Sparkle."

"The earliest we have an opening is two days from now. Will that work?"

"Yes."

The clerk penciled in something on her clipboard. "All right. Do you need anything else?"

Oh yes. She needed quite a few things, but the clerk couldn't really give them to her.

"No. Thank you."

"No problem! Have a nice day."

"You too."

Twilight turned and walked out the building, Pinkie still silently bouncing behind her. They were out a few steps, and Twilight was getting ready to start bouncing herself when somepony appeared behind them.

"Hey!" Somepony shouted behind them. Not only that, but he sounded like he wanted to pick a fight.

Twilight and Pinkie turned around to see who it was. One of the stallions from the building was following them.

"You!" He said, pointing at Pinkie. "I lost my job because of you!"

Oh dear...that wasn't good. Twilight would never even think Pinkie would cause somepony to get fired...but it wasn't hard to think her antics would do something to upset somepony's boss.

Pinkie gasped. "I did? Oh, I'm so sorry! Is there something I can do to help you out?"

"Yeah..." The pony said. "Hold still."

The pony raised his hoof and socked Pinkie in the cheek. He was hefty, so the punch knocked her aside.

"Ow!"

Twilight's senses came to a halt. Her first priority should've been to make sure Pinkie was okay, but Twilight knew her next thought was going to be dealing with the stallion...and she wasn't sure she wanted to do that. Not for fear of the stallion hurting her.

Quite the opposite, in fact.

"Pinkie!" Twilight exclaimed, rushing over to give Pinkie some support. "Are you okay, sweetie?"

"I think so..." Pinkie rubbed her cheek sorely.

The stallion whinnied disapprovingly.

Twilight, knowing Pinkie was going to live, rounded on her attacker.

"You! You should be ashamed of yourself, just hitting ponies like that!"

The stallion scoffed. "You wanna get into a fight with me, missy?"

"No...but I also don't want you hitting my friends! Or any pony's friends, for that matter!"

The stallion frowned at her. He raised his hoof and wounded it up to hit her, but Twilight reacted.

She grabbed his hoof with her magic and forced it to be still. The stallion's eyes widened at the loss of control of his limb.

Twilight should've been willing to let him off with a warning this time. Three strikes and a pony was out, and as far she knew, this was only his first strike.

...But he had hurt Pinkie.

He hurt Pinkie.

He hurt Pinkie!

"You know something?" Twilight said, taunting him. "I bet it wasn't Pinkie who got you fired so much as your bad attitude!"

Not an unreasonable theory, actually, giving the stallion's violence, but...

Twilight grabbed his other hoof with her magic then wrapped both of them around his neck, and began choking him with his own hooves, levitating him into the air.

He gasped for air. "HA-lack!"

"Twilight!?" Pinkie exclaimed. "What are you doing!?"

...I don't know.

Twilight dropped the stallion to the ground.

"Oh, gee, I'm sorry about that, mister! I just...I was really upset you hit my friend."

"Oh, yeah, no, sure!" The stallion said, trying to say something that would get this crazy mare off him. He scrambled himself together and ran off, quite possibly forsaking his appointment with the psychiatrist.

Twilight turned to Pinkie with a smile, but Pinkie was pouting. Twilight didn't like that.

"What's wrong, Pinkie?" Twilight cooed softly...and perhaps a bit more flirty then she intended.

"That thing you did with that stallion...that was really scary, Twilight."

"Mmmm." Twilight wasn't quite sure how to proceed. Just try to shrug it off? Say it was nothing? No, no, it wasn't nothing; she had choked a stallion with his own hooves. Celestia would disapprove of dismissing it completely.

Twilight wrapped her legs around Pinkie's neck and stroked her mane. "Hey, it's okay. I'm not a sociopath, Pinkie."
Twilight lowered her eyelids. Pinkie probably didn't know what a sociopath was.

"I'm not dangerous, is what I mean. I just...I'm really protective of my friends, you know? Friends, family..." She stroked Pinkie's mane again. "And others."

Twilight leaned in forward for the kill...or kiss, rather.

Pinkie jumped out of Twilight's hooves before any connections could be made, oblivious to the unicorn's longing.

"We should go see Rainbow Dash's tricks now!" Pinkie exclaimed.

Oh yeah. Twilight was so preoccupied with the therapist, and then the stallion that she forgot all about that.

Twilight skipped behind Pinkie's bouncing as Pinkie led the way to the empty, out of the way grass patch where Dash could normally be found when she had stunts to perform. A rainbow trail was curving through the sky above.

"Rainbow Dash!" Pinkie exclaimed. "Rainbow Dash, Twilight and I are here to see your tricks!"

The rainbow trail totally halted to see what was trying to grab her attention. Dash seemed quite pleased to see her friends.

"All right guys, are you watching?"

They nodded. Dash kept questioning them, trying to pump them up for her trick.

"Are you ready? Are you prepared for this!?"

"YEAH!"

"Come on, Rainbow! Show us what it is already!"

"Right! Keep your eyes on the one, the only, the amazing Rainbow Dash!"

Dash sped through the air, zipping through the air in a straight line, then swerved, then kept going in a straight line. Twilight and Pinkie kept their eyes on her, but Twilight eventually saw what she was doing.

"You're just making your Cutie Mark!" Twilight accused. Dash ignored her.

Once the air painting of Dash's Cutie Mark had been completed, Dash flew a real cloud over it and connected it to the cloud of the painting. Dash steadied herself, then bucked the cloud, sending out a huge yellow lightning flash...then a huge blue lightning flash...then a yellow one.

Twilight and Pinkie's eyes rolled around in their heads as they tried to get their vision swimming back to where it was supposed to be.

"Okay, I was wrong." Twilight admitted. "That was pretty-"

"AWE-SSUUUM!"

Twilight didn't feel like disagreeing with Pinkie right now. Not that she ever did.

"Heh!" Dash snickered, self-assured as always. "The Wonderbolts will beg me to join them now!"

Twilight couldn't keep her amusement at Dash's ego in check. "Yeeeah...you're irresistible now."

"That's right!" Dash said, resting on a cloud and not catching the sarcasm in Twilight's voice.

Nothing eventful happened for the rest of the day. Twilight did Twilight things. Pinkie did Pinkie things. Sometimes Pinkie's would mess up Twilight's, but she couldn't stay angry.

At the library, in the dark of the night, after Spike made a delicious dinner for the three of them- which Twilight had pressed him to not use jewels for- and they had helped him slap together something for Pinkie to sleep on, Pinkie had volunteered to help Spike with clean-up.

Twilight thought that she looked so cute, dressed up in her little apron. And maybe a few other things Twilight...probably shouldn't have been thinking.

Hiding behind the door frame of the kitchen's entrance, the shadows covering her from Spike and Pinkie's view. Pinkie was idly washing the dishes while Spike swept. Twilight should help with clean-up one of these days, but she wasn't up to it today.

Watching Pinkie doing the dishes, Twilight began thinking about recent experiences. The stallion she had attacked today...manipulating his own body against him... Twilight decided she needed to think about something else.

Perhaps yesterday at the doctor's would provide an answer. Twilight remembered thinking about how stimulating having somepony else gnawing on her tail would be to her...

Actually, given what she had done with the stallion earlier...

Twilight activated her magic and grabbed the base of Pinkie's tail with it, giving a huge, firm, yet gentle tug on all the hair roots nestled under Pinkie's skin.

Pinkie made a very...interesting squeal, like she wasn't sure whether to be pleased at or scared of the new sensation. She stopped washing and rubbed her tail to check for anomalies.

"Heey! If you're a ghost or something trying to play a game, you should at least ponies' permission before you start tail-tugging!"

Twilight looked downwards. That squeal- it had been so nice to hear that slightly-pleased squeal, but now that Pinkie had said her peace, one thought gnarled at Twilight's mind...

I...I should stop now.

So, without so much as a 'good night', Twilight turned around, galloped up the stairs and tucked in early.
> Fight or Flight
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

Oh joy oh joy...here she goes again. Her void. Day after tomorrow, Twilight would be able to discuss it all with a licensed, trained, professional therapist and maybe figure out how and why the void had been acting independently of her thoughts, but tonight and the next, she'd have to tough it out herself.

She looked around, not seeing anything initially. After a while though, she could see the mannequin from two nights ago waving at her.

Twilight made a displeased noise, but approached it. Once in arm, er, leg's reach of him, a cart like a carnival ride rose up out of the ground.

The mannequin opened the door for and offered her a seat.

Twilight frowned, suspicious and distrusting of the mannequin given what happened last time, but took the seat. The mannequin took the other seat and lowered the safety rail.

The cart whirred, hummed, and groaned. Twilight looked to the mannequin as if it could give an explanation, but it just smiled at her bashfully.

She 'hmph'ed.

The mannequin, sensing she was displeased, leaned over and nuzzled her, unaware it was the source of her frustration.

The cart made a clink, then took off on its accord, moving at speeds that made Rainbow Dash seem like a road safe driver. Twilight was fairly certain her the cart was going to come to an abrupt stop any minute and cause the safety rail to bang against her chest and crush her heart.

Speaking of crushed hearts, Twilight heard it again. Twilight heard her again. She was singing. Beautifully, despite the ever-present squeak in her tone. Twilight felt lighter then air hearing it.

"Mmmm..." Entranced, enchanted and charmed, Twilight began struggling to break free of the cart so she could trace the music back it's source. So she could find her.

The mannequin saw what she was doing and attempted to restrain her so she wouldn't hurt herself. She grunted, groaned and whinnied in protest, trying to wiggle herself free of him/it.

"Mmmh! Nhhhhn! EEEEEEEEEIIIIINee!"

But no matter what she did, she couldn't pry herself free of it. And when it let her go...the melodious sound was gone.

Like a spoiled, undisciplined foal, Twilight whined at the missed opportunity.




Waking up at the time she was supposed to have woken up - that is, before Spike, Twilight rolled over and the first thing she noticed was that Pinkie Pie was in the bed they had built for her.

Like a puppy denied a treat, Twilight reached her hoof and whined, yearning for Pinkie's touch. The feel of her fur on Twilight's hoof...maybe Twilight's hoof could pet Pinkie a little, and then her hoof would slowly edge towards Pinkie's Cutie Mark...

"Mmph." Twilight, unable to suppress herself anymore, tossed the covers of her own bed off and jumped off the bed. She walked to Pinkie's bed and petted it the back of her neck.

Pinkie made a noise and rolled over... showing that her eyes were open! Oh dear! What would Pinkie say knowing Twilight had snuck over for the sole purpose of petting her neck!?

Pinkie...snored?

Twilight leaned over and saw Pinkie's chest rising and lowering with the motions made by snoring...but...but her eyes were open! What's going on here? Maybe Pinkie slept with her eyes open?...That seemed quite reasonable, actually. But Twilight got the feeling that wasn't it.

Putting her hoof on Pinkie's face, Twilight could feel something about Pinkie's face was... off.

"Hmm..."

Jerking her hoof, Twilight tore off a leather band from Pinkie's face, showing that Pinkie's eyes were closed. Examining the leather in her hoof, Twilight saw it was colored to match Pinkie's skin and eyes.

...Oooooh! This must've been Pinkie's unique take on those novelty glasses that make it look ponies were still awake when they weren't! Perhaps she got it from that novelty store in the market.

Twilight gently draped the band back to it's proper place before Pinkie could wake up and notice it's absence. Twilight's head leaned in closer, but pulled back. If she kissed Pinkie Pie now, while Pinkie was asleep as a guest in her own home...what would ponies think? What would her friends think?

But Pinkie looked so cute while she was asleep...so cute and...vulnerable. Obviously, she needed somepony to...protect her from nasty things like bed monsters.

Twilight closed her eyes and tried to pull herself back to reality. There was no such as bed monsters. She was clearly just trying to give herself an excuse to get close to Pinkie.

She quickly scampered over back under her own bed's covers and engaged in the typical 'wait for Spike to make breakfast' deal.

It took Spike a while to wake up and go downstairs, but that was less because of Spike's sloth and more because of the theory of relativity.

Shortly after Spike left, Pinkie sprung upright in her bed, tossing her fake open eyes away, revealing the sparkling sapphires beneath. Twilight could feel Pinkie's eyes on her even without looking.

She could also sense Pinkie drawing closer, intent on jumping into the air and waking Twilight with a ker-plopp, unaware Twilight was already awake.

Yes, Pinkie...jump. Jump on top of meee~~. Twilight thought, eager to feel Pinkie again.

Pinkie, whether or not she could hear Twilight's thoughts or not, obliged, bending downwards and jumping into the air and crashing down on her.

Twilight was so pleased she couldn't remember her mantra of 'control', moaning and shooting her legs upwards to embrace Pinkie.

"Are you okay, Twilight?" Pinkie asked, flopping Twilight's legs off. "That was a pretty weird noise you made just now!"

"I'm..." Hungry for your touch, thirsty for your saliva in my throat and suffering mental delusions in both dreams and reality stemming from my lust for you. "Fine. I'm fine, sweetie."

"Sweetie? Eesh, Twilight, I know we're friends, but it's not like we're dating or something!"

Oooohh... poor, unknowing Pinkie. She didn't know how much her saying that pounded Twilight in the heart with a master craftsmare's hammer.

"Yeah, yeah I know we're not. I was just, um...practicing!" Twilight nodded, more to herself then to Pinkie out of satisfaction with that excuse. "For when I do find that special pony!"
(Slyly leaving out that she had been imagining Pinkie as that special pony.)

"Oh...okay! I understand. Practice makes perfect and all that!" Pinkie smiled, which relived Twilight.

Twilight reached a hoof to touch Pinkie, but Spike returned from downstairs.

"Breakfast is ready! Hey, what are you two doing?"

Twilight realized Pinkie Pie was still on top of her, Twilight's hoof extended to touch her.

Twilight lost it, thinking that her pet assistant was going to start thinking of her negatively- for whatever poorly thought-out reason- after having seen her get so close to Pinkie. "Um, um...um..."

"Twilight's practicing on how she's going to talk to her special somepony with me as the practice dummy!"

Focus, Twilight! Control! Stay in control! The mental reminder came too late. Thankfully, Pinkie had already made an explanation.

"Huh." Spike scratched his head. "Twilight, don't you think you should wait until you have a special somepony before trying to practice how you're going to talk to them?"

Twilight seized on the chance to turn this around, maintain Spike's image of her, and most importantly, mask her secret affections. "You know what, Spike? You're absolutely right. I should wait before trying to practice." Twilight nodded to herself again.

"Okay...say, are you two going to come eat breakfast or not?"

"Yes! We'll be right there!" Twilight and Pinkie quickly made their way off the bed and down the stairs to eat whatever Spike had whipped up today. Oatmeal with carrots chopped up into it. Not the best of combined flavors, but it wasn't bad.

"Oh, Twilight! I forgot! I promised Applejack I'd help her with the apple bucking today so she and Granny Smith could have the extra apples on hoof to make treats!"

Twilight did her best to smile. She didn't want to let Pinkie go, but...Pinkie wasn't her possession.

Not yet, at least. A devious little voice in the back of her mind said.

Shut up. She retorted. "It's okay, Pinkie. You can go ahead and help Applejack. I don't mind." That last part was a filthy, filthy lie, but...

Pinkie pffted. "What? No! I mean you're going to have come with me to help!"

"What!?" Wrong answer! Wrong answer! Wrong answer! "I mean...of course I'll come, Pinkie! Wouldn't miss it!"

Pinkie smiled.

Nags of doubt began plaguing Twilight's mind. She wouldn't be of much help. She wasn't an athlete, by any stretch of the imagination.

Finishing up breakfast, Pinkie bounced out of the library, taking the occasional glance behind her to make sure Twilight was following. Which she was of, course. Twilight probably couldn't not follow her. Happy as always and oblivious to the turmoil in Twilight's head, Pinkie kept on bouncing. Twilight could share her enthusiasm and just walked behind her.

Pinkie's bouncing also spared her from falling to a random mud pit, a luxury earthbound Twilight was unable to enjoy.

"Aagh!" Twilight cried as the water-dirt mixture sprayed over her. "Pinkie, I need to go back to the library to clean up!"

"Why? It's not a like a little mud ever hurt anypony!"

"No, but customers won't buy mud-covered apples, and my hooves won't be able to buck as well with the mud on them."

"Oh. Okay!"

Pinkie Pie and Twilight turned around and went back to the library.

"You're back early." Spike quipped. "How'd the bucking go?"

"It hasn't." Twilight told him. "We had to come back here so I could clean up and not get mud all over Applejack's apples."

"Oh. Here, let me help with you that..."

"Thanks, Spike."

Spike helped Twilight into the bathroom and helped get it ready for her. Twilight's pressing need to maintain her punctuality thankfully prevented her from trying to invite Pinkie Pie inside with her.

After they had managed to rinse the mud off and soap away any lingering bacteria, Twilight and Pinkie waved good-bye to Spike and headed back out.

The day proved that it wasn't going to get any better, though, for after Pinkie and Twilight managed to get back to where they were, the same thing happened, but with a ditch in the road instead of a mud pit. And Pinkie Pie fell in with her this time.

"Mud I can understand..." Twilight muttered. "Mud can come from rain, so it makes sense that nopony would notice for awhile...but who puts a ditch in the middle of the road!?"

"It's okay!" Pinkie said. "All we have to do is climb back out!"

"Easier said than done..." Twilight looked at the slope of the ditch. Their flat hooves wouldn't be able to grasp it very well, if at all.

"Hup, hup, two!" Pinkie said, throwing herself onto the the slope and bouncing right off it. She reached back down to offer Twilight a hoof to help her up.

"Thanks." Twilight grabbed the hoof and let Pinkie pull her out of the ditch. Pinkie took a moment to make sure Twilight was okay, giving her a pat on the back.

"Look ooooooout!" Somepony yelled at them.

Looking to the side revealed there was a pony pulling a wagon, and it was clear even having seen them, she didn't have the reaction need to come to a complete stop before she hit them.

Twilight and Pinkie split up and hit the deck, ducking for cover, allowing the lady to roll by them without anypony getting hurt.

"Sorry about that!" She shouted behind them.

"It's okay!" Pinkie assured her. "Come on, Twilight...Twilight?" Looking around, Pinkie found that Twilight was back in the ditch. A result of having jumped out of the way. Pinkie focused and quickly made to help Twilight out...again.

"Thanks..." Twilight muttered.

"No problem! Now come on, Applejack's gonna think we forgot about her if we don't get there soon!"

Twilight decided to follow Pinkie's lead, bouncing and skipping the rest of the way, in the hopes it would allow them to reach the apple orchards before the day was over.

Whether or not it was successful was up to debate, but Twilight and Pinkie managed to get there shortly after, the pony in the wagon being the last of their distractions.

"Phhew!" Twilight breathed a sign of relief. "We made it..."

"Yep! ...Hey..." Pinkie's ear perked up. Twilight's did the same to see what had made Pinkie's do that.

"It's been a while, Ah'll admit, but Ah don't think that's right wut happened, Rainbow."

"That's got to be what happened! Why else would Pinkie not show up?"

Twilight and Pinkie exchanged glances.

"We'd better get in there and see what's going on!"

The two of them rushed into the orchard to see Applejack and Rainbow Dash there, Dash slightly off the ground with her front legs crossed on top of a barrel.

"Hey, there's the lassies!" Applejack said at their notice. "Wut kept ya?"

"A bunch of things." Twilight answered.

"Really?" Dash asked, suspicious. She zoomed over to in Twilight's face. "Are you sure it didn't take so long because of you?"

Twilight was confused at Dash's question, but...control. Precision. Dash is suspicious of something...whatever that something is. "W-what do you mean, Rainbow?"

"I mean that I think you held Pinkie up because you wanted her to spend more time with you instead of helping Applejack like she promised!"

"What!?" Twilight was aghast. She would never do something like that! Commitment was important, and she wouldn't try to get somepony to ditch a commitment just to spend time with them.

"Ah'm sorry, sugercube...yer still new here, an' we don't rightly know ya well enough to know whether or not you'd do something like that."

"I would never! I was going to help you with Pinkie, but we got held up! Pinkie, tell them!"

"Oh yeah!" Pinkie said. "First Twilight fell into a mud pit, so then we had to go back home and clean up so she wouldn't get mud on the apples, then when we're done with that and on our way again, we feel into a ditch, and then somepony nearly ran us over- by accident, so then Twilight ended up in the ditch again!"

Dash looked to Applejack, who seemed not to know how to react.

"Well, R.D?"

"Fine..." Dash groaned. She poked Twilight's chest. "But you watch it, or else!"

Twilight nodded. Dash, as confident, loyal...and confrontational as a pony could be.

"C'mon y'all." Applejack said. "Them apples ain't gonna buck themselves."

Applejack's words made a mad idea go off in Twilight's head. "Oh! What if they could?"

Applejack glared. "Y'all aren't suggestin' usin' yer magic to make the trees buck 'emselves, are ya?"

Twilight shirked. That was what she was suggesting, but Applejack clearly didn't like the idea. Let's file that away for future reference. "It was, but...I understand if you don't want to."

"Ah don't, thank y'all kindly. It makes the taste of the apples impure."

Twilight nodded. That was understandable from a Earth pony's perspective. Earth pony affect crops, soil and the earth, while unicorn magic was more arcane in nature. The notion that unicorn magic could somehow impair the apples wasn't as silly as might seem at first.

"Wait a minute." Dash objected. "Using magic to make the apples buck themselves would open the whole day so we could go do other things!"

"It would, but it ain't worth it."

"Oh come on! Not worth more time for tricks? That's ridiculous!"

Twilight grimaced. Applejack and Dash were starting to get into a fight, and...it was quite clear from Applejack's stubbornness this wouldn't be as easy to dissolve as Pinkie's and Dash's argument yesterday.

"It ain't worth goofin' iffit makes the apples impure!"

"Sure it is!"

"Um, girls?" Twilight said. "There's really no need for this- if Applejack doesn't me to use magic, I won't use magic."

Dash didn't hear her. "You realize how much time it would save if Twilight used magic, right?

"Ah do, an' Ah realize it wouldn't be worth it!"

"So!?"

"So!? Wut ddy'a mean 'so'!?"

Twilight was at even worse predicament then Dash and Pinkie's fight. That was more a conflicting opinion then a fight compared to this! There, she couldn't think of anything that didn't sound like she was favoring one over the other...here, she couldn't think of anything at all!

It was getting too much. One of many reasons she was an indoors pony was that she didn't like conflict.

The second void- the white void- started forming, and this time, it included fuzzy silhouettes of her friends shouting at each other.

Reality taking a backseat, Twilight threw herself between the two shadows and tried to pull them into a group hug. The shadows fidgeted from her touch, and her nuzzling to try to sooth them did nothing.

The shadows removed themselves from her- somepony shouted something she couldn't make it out and it wasn't clear what happened next...

At least, not in the void.

In reality, however, Twilight had just been on the receiving ends of bucks from Applejack and Rainbow Dash meant for each other, and dream void, white void, or no void at all, Twilight's vision went black as she faded into unconsciousness... it was no wonder being hit by Dash and Applejack both knocked her out. After all...

Twilight wasn't an athlete, by any stretch of the imagination.
> Psychosomatic
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

Twilight Sparkle was the apprentice, nay, number one student, of Princess Celestia. She was practically raised by Celestia as much as her own mother had raised her. Thus, she was taught how to be reasonable, to be punctual, and had the pinnacle of elegance to form her vocabulary.

So when she stirred awake, carried like a sack of dead plants to be disposed on the backs of her friends Applejack and Rainbow Dash, it was naturally she said something poetic and scholarly.

"Urrrooogh..."

There, see? Poetic, scholarly and elegant.

"Y'all okay, sugarcube?" Applejack asked out of concern for her friend.

"Yeah..." Twilight answered, not wanting Applejack to worry. She tried to push herself up off their backs, but fell back down and collapsed on them, making them both grunt. They didn't fall over, though.

"What were you thinking?" Dash demanded. "You know me and A.J are tough ponies. We'd had barely felt it if the other bucked us."

"I don't..." Twilight stuttered out. "I don't...like...conflict."

"That's a'ight, Twilight. We shouldn'na been fightin' like that...of course, Dash should've not suggested using yer magic on the apple trees."

"It'd get things done faster!" Dash arrogantly reminded her.

"Now you listen here, Rainbow Dash, mah family has-"

Twilight whimpered and covered her eyes with her hooves, trying to block the rest of the world- and them- out.
Applejack and Rainbow were made aware of themselves.

"We'll talk about this later." Applejack growled to Dash, making quite clear the rainbow pegasus wasn't off the hook yet.

"Wait..." Twilight realized something was missing. "No, no, wait...where's...aaaagh!" The pain from her sides proved too much for the dusty librarian, who really should've known moving when injured agitated injuries, and Twilight collapsed.

Know about having an 'mind's eye'? Well, Twilight was having a 'mind's voice' right now, and there was one phrase being spoken by it, over and over again, because unconscious or not, Twilight couldn't rest without knowing the answer to the question...

Where's Pinkie?

Where's Pinkie?

WHERE'S PINKIE!?




"Where's...where's Pinkie Pie?" were the first words out of Twilight's mouth when she got back to the land of the waking ponies. She was in somewhere with bright lighting...too bright. Turn it down! Somepony, turn it down! She had to squint to keep it from hurting. She was lying down on something. Something flat, with her legs splayed out in all directions.

"Uh, who?" A nasally voice asked her.

"Pinkie Pie..." Twilight murmured. "She's my friend...and my..." Darling? Crush? Object? Cupcake? Sole driving force in life? That last one was good. "She's my cupcake..."

Somepony around her chuckled. "Well, you can have all the cupcakes once we're done."

Done? Done doing what?

"Can you open your mouth, please?"

I can...but I really don't want to for you.

"Mrph." Twilight grunted as her response.

"What? Oh...she must be out again. Just hold her mouth open, all right?"

No! No it's not all right! Who were these ponies!? What did they want from her-with her?

Somepony put their hooves on her snout and pried it open. She tried to close it back down, but the pony made sure her muscle strength in her mouth wasn't as tough as the muscle strength in their own legs. A spoon was shoved into her mouth, and she could feel some powder being dropped on her tongue.

She tried to spit it out, but the pony holding her mouth snapped it shut -OW! Freaking hay... where was she? Oh, yes, powder! Tongue! Forced to swallow! Uhhgggg...not pleasant...the taste was only a fraction of her displeasure.

"We should let her rest." One calm, reasonable-sounding voice said. Twilight could hear a door open, ponies' footsteps as they walked out of the room, and heard the ratcheting click of a fancy light switching before hearing a door close.

"Ooooum..." Twilight grunted, and now with the lights no longer being so blasted bright to disorientate her, attempted to get up, having learned nothing from her earlier experience.

"Nrrrgh..." Protesting against her body's protesting, as if her non-words would somehow make it cooperate, Twilight fumbled and fiddled until she could get herself standing on all fours.

She carefully, cautiously, tensely, carefully made her way off of whatever flat surface she had been splayed on. Despite her caution, she tumbled onto the cold tile floor.

"Uggh..." She rubbed her head and got up, taking in her surroundings. She was somewhere with soothing blue colors. She could make out the door and the light switch- or was it really a switch, given that it ratcheted and more adjusted the light then turned it off?

Dismissing that thought, she lugged over to the door and creaked it open. Where was Pinkie Pie?
Where was she?

Whatever was going on, and wherever Twilight herself was, she was going to find that mare, whatever may get in her way.

She heard something fall down behind her and ignored it. It couldn't be important, could it?

Something came up behind and wrapped around her tail, which was startling enough, but it was more concerning was that her first instinct was not to attack. She could feel that whatever was on was...nice.

Twilight tried to say something as she limped out the door, but that powder must've numbed her mouth, because she couldn't anything more coherent then 'ooogh', 'urrgh', and 'mmph.'

She stepped out the door to be hit by more unbearably bright lighting. Daaah! Why were these lights so very bright? Was that really necessary?

Moving on, Twilight made her way down the hallway- that was what it is, right? That was what it looked like. There were doors everywhere.

Doors everywhere...

That would mean there were rooms everywhere, and if there were rooms everywhere, then Pinkie could have been anywhere in any of them!

Twilight sniffed a little.

Pinkie...you said you were going to stick with me 24-7! Not 23, not 22, 24! Why...why did you leave me!? Am I not as important to you as Rainbow Dash or-or- or Fluttershy or any other pony you spent a Celebratory Week with!?

PIiiiiiiiiiiinnnkiiiie!

"Hey!" Somepony shouted at her in the midst of her woe. "You can't be out here! Get back to bed!"

No! She was out here in who-knows-where, where mysterious ponies she didn't recognize had resorted to forcing her mouth open to make her swallow some powder she didn't know the purpose, and this pony had the gall to tell 'go back to bed'? The nerve of some ponies...

Twilight trudged forward, her hooves not lifting up to walk so much as doing an impression of a slug to scoot across the floor.

"Didn't you hear me? I said go back to bed! And what is that on your tail!?"

That last one was a good question that Twilight would answer later.

The pony signed. "I see...you're one of those types."

Those types? What did that mean, those types? Types of what?

Twilight wasn't sure what had clamped on her tail, but she was certain a stallion had been the thing that rammed into her side just now. He grabbed her by the withers and tried to lift her up.

Making half-muffled noises of protest from her own mouth no longer working, Twilight bucked out and attempted to lash the stallion away. As she felt herself being carried off the ground, Twilight figured bucking wasn't enough.

So she used her magic to blast him away.

"Nnnggh..." Twilight grunted and continued on with her quest, attempting to get down the hallway and out of this bad place.

"Can I get some help in here!?" The stallion shouted. "We have a testy patient!"

Well, of course Twilight was going to be testy, given that she had no idea where she was or the ponies around were. Realizing reinforcements for the stallion wouldn't be far off, Twilight overcame her disabilities and broke off in a gallop. Amazing what adrenaline can do for a girl.

One of the doors to her left opened up, revealing a pony who Twilight thought looked sleepy, but given her mental state right now, she wasn't sure that was his actual condition.

"W-" He yawned. Twilight noted she was closer to the mark then she had suspected. "What's going on out here?"

Twilight zoomed right by him like a speeding bullet, startling him back into the room.

"Fwehere..." Twilight murmured. Some feeling was getting back into her mouth, but not enough to ask where Pinkie, where her cupcake, where her darling was.

One door opened on either side of the hallway, and two ponies in coats tried to barricade her way out. "Stop right there!" They yelled, holding out their hooves for stop signs.

Whinnying, Twilight lowered her horn and used it to toss them out of her way.

"Fwerhe's...Minnkieeeee?" Twilight whined, her tongue still not working as well as she'd liked.

"We got a runner!" Somepony yelled.

"Mmrrph!"

Twilight started galloping even faster, trying to get out.

"Get some help!" One of her pursuers yelled. "-her friends!"

Twilight careened to a halt. What about her friends? Those ponies better not hurt them! Especially not Pinkie Pie!

"Twilight! Slow down!"

Twilight was running so fast and so worried about her friends she didn't realize she was about to crash into one of said friends until it was too late.

"Ooof! Aphle...jack?" Twilight muttered.

"Yeah, it's me, sugercube." Applejack's blurry image assured her, patting on the back of the neck. "What's got y'all riled up there, Twilight? Ya done near trampled half the staff!"

Staff? What staff? Never mind, Applejack had asked a question. She deserved an answer.

"Where's...Pinkie Pie?"

"Pinkie?" Applejack responded. "She's, uh...well...she's on yer tail."

What!? Twilight whipped her neck back around to see that, yes, Pinkie was on her tail, her mouth adorably clamped on the tip of it and her body hanging off like an angler fish's lure. How exactly Pinkie Pie was there without weighing Twilight down with the mass of her body was questionable, but Pinkie's done things that made this tame in comparison.

Pinkie smiled through her mouthful of tail and waved.

Twilight wished she would bite on it harder, and pull...

"What's...going on?"

"Easy, sugercube." Applejack said. "Just go back to the bed, and we'll figure it all out later, all right?"

"No...not all right...I want...an explanation...now."

Applejack signed and shook her head. "Pinkie, could you, uh do something?"

"Mm-hmm!" Pinkie nodded affirmatively and jumped off Twilight's tail, then hugged Twilight. Twilight, inhibitions faded from whatever had been afflicting her, shivered and moaned from her touch- right in front of Applejack.

"Come on, Twilight!" Pinkie said. "Just go back to the bed and lay down, okay?"

"Okay...as long as you're here." Twilight nuzzled Pinkie and let Pinkie escort her back to the room she escaped from.

Pinkie helped her up onto the bed and lied her down.

"You should get some sleep before you bowl somepony over again." Pinkie told her.

"Okay...whatever you say..."

Beautiful. Whatever you say, beautiful.

Granted, 'Beautiful' was an adjective and not a pronoun, so using it to address Pinkie was...erroneous. But those smooth-talking slicked-haired anti-hero colts in movies did it all the time when flirting!

Twilight took in a deep breath and tried to calm down enough to go to sleep, as per the request of the object of her desire.



Sometime later, Twilight could feel herself waking up, where Applejack, Rainbow Dash, Pinkie Pie and a doctor pony were looking at her expectantly.

"Howdy, Twi'...you feeling better now?"

"Explanation." Twilight demanded, getting right to the point.

"She's fine." Dash concluded at the somewhat sharp demand.

"Uh, yeah. Explainin' all that...well, from the looks of things, the doctors gave you some painkiller medication that made y'all go loopy, and ya crawled outta tha' bed to look for Pinkie Pie."

"That's me!" Pinkie smiled and waved excitedly.

"Mm-hmm..."Twilight groaned and shook her head, motioning for Applejack to continue.

"But what y'all didn't know was that Pinkie Pie hid the rafters of the ceiling after being told she couldn't come in the room with y'all while the doctors tried to fix ya up."

Wait...what? That would mean...that Pinkie Pie was with her the whole time... the thing that fell down she had the instinct to not hit! That was Pinkie Pie! She nearly taken the- where ever they were- apart looking for somepony she already had! Kinda funny, really, but...

"Why am I at the doctor's? And what were the painkillers for?"

"For when me and Dash both bucked y'all, that's why- and what." Applejack explained.

Twilight realized that all the ponies she been knocking over and blasting aside must've been staff- the staff Applejack mentioned- just trying to coax her back to bed before she hurt somepony or something in her delusion caused by the painkiller, which just had to be the powder she'd been fed.

"Oooh..." Embarrassed, Twilight put her hooves into her face...wait, that doesn't sound right.

"Uh, can we ask you a question, Twilight?" Applejack asked.

You just did, but... "Sure!"

"Well, y'all went all over the place looking for Pinkie until Ah pointed she was on yer tail...and when Pinkie hugged ya right there-"

"You calmed down like she was your big pink teddy bear." Dash quipped.

"And y'all...moaned."

Applejack looked to Rainbow Dash for assurance, who motioned for the farmer to continue.

"You, uh..."

Applejack paused.

"Y'all wanna explain that for us, sugercube?"
> Schizo-Friend-ia
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

There were a few things in the world that were always completely amazing, no matter how much a pony had been through. Even a war would do nothing to diminish their impressiveness.

For example, the amount of time and preparation of a possibility a pony would take, and then still be unprepared when that possibility did the slow and gradual evolution from possibility, to eventuality, to having had happened.

Like now, for instance. Despite everything, the mechanisms, the excuses, the reasonable explanations Twilight had spent hours in the recesses of her library in the event something happened that would cause Twilight's thoughts about Pinkie being exposed.

It was rather noteworthy, that not a few moments' worth ago, Twilight was sharply and harshly demanding explanation. Now Applejack's polite, pensive request for the same had sent Twilight sprawling into a nervous shut-down.

Out of at least dozen explanations Twilight had thought of for any random peculiar behaviors she might have displayed, not one was coming to her right now.

"...Twilight? You all right there, sugercube?"

Twilight's mind slowly started snail-trailing it's way back to operational order. In her worry and fear, it took some time for her to realize Applejack had just given the perfect excuse to her on a shiny, silver- no, golden- platter.

Twilight cleared her throat. "Um, no! I'm not all right. Could you leave while I pull myself back together?"

Applejack nodded. Rainbow Dash followed Applejack as Applejack followed the doctor. Pinkie stayed behind, despite Applejack's concern for that.

Pinkie simultaneously respected Twilight's space while still keeping to her '24/7' mantra by backing up into a corner of the room, so Twilight could have her freak-out unhindered and in peace.

NYaaah! What I am gonna do!?

Twilight looked around the room. Maybe she could crawl out the window...no, no, that was a bad idea. She'd probably hurt herself- AGAIN- and it would only postpone her need to explain.

Twilight noticed a steel drawer on the side of her bed.

Maybe I can find something in there...

She pulled it open and reached her hoof to take out whatever was in there. It was a tiny medicine bottle.

Great! One of the voices in head noted. Maybe you can swallow the whole bottle and kill yourself to keep from having to explain.

Oh, come on. Even I think that's a bit of an overreaction.

Rather than put the bottle back, Twilight threw the medicine bottle into her bed where it landed neatly in the fluff of her tail. In order to show that she wasn't willing to entertain her the voices' in her head's crazy ideas-

I am NOT CRAZY! And by extension, any voice inside my head is ALSO not crazy!

The voices in her head's questionable ideas.

Twilight took in a deep breath, her withers tense and eyes blank as she continued to ponder how to deal with the situation still at hoof.

She looked down at her tail, where the medicine bottle was still nestled.

...That's it! The medicine! Not that she was considering her voice's suggestion. But hadn't she been half-numbed by painkiller medicine? Hadn't she gone rampaging through a doctor's office because of it?

No. She had gone rampaging because she didn't know where Pinkie Pie Dearest was. She had gone rampaging because she didn't know where she herself was, so she had assumed the worst.

But yes, the medicine was the answer! She could say the painkiller had messed with her brain- which, as Twilight always preferred when making stuff up, had some grain of truth to it. It had numbed her tongue, hadn't it? Who is to say it didn't cause other problems?

The professional doctors, of course, but Twilight didn't care what they said.

"Okay, girls!" Twilight called. "Come back in! I'm ready to explain."

Applejack and Rainbow Dash came back in. They explained that the doctor didn't need to come back yet.

"So..." Applejack drawled.

"It was the painkiller." Twilight said. "That's why I moaned. I'm fine now, though."

Applejack and Rainbow exchanged looks, not entirely sure they bought it.

Twilight, getting back to her hooves and back into the swing of things, sighed frustratedly. "Painkiller medication causes all sorts of problem with your brain. It doesn't treat pain. It just numbs the nerves that let you feel it."

Applejack and Rainbow's expressions were blank and dull at Twilight's explaining of how painkiller worked. It wasn't quite technobabble, but it was close enough Applejack and Rainbow accepted Twilight's saying that it was the painkiller. They were afraid further inquires would result in further technobabble, no doubt.

After Applejack and Dash left, one doctor came back and said that Twilight was going to have to stay for the night and some of the next day. She was purportedly in fine physical condition- nothing serious, but they wanted her to rest.

(...And the doctor leaned in and whispered that Twilight's escapades in the hallway had put everypony in the office on edge and wanting to be sure Twilight was somewhere she could be observed.)

Twilight nodded to assure she understood. Imagining herself in the doctors' horseshoes, she'd be on edge around herself too.

Pinkie, caring, asked the doctor to bring Twilight a book. A medium sized book that wasn't a magazine or newspaper. The doctor brought in a book of his own possession that he was willing to loan. It was a respectable tome in Twilight's eyes. It was mostly about how to...deal with testy patients.

Twilight blushed a little.

She read through the book, and as was the tendency for books to do- that one in the library on the day of the picnic not withstanding- Twilight got lost in it, and by the time she put it down, it was time to sleep.

Of course more awkwardness was to ensue. Pinkie was unwilling to part with Twilight while it was still her Celebratory Week. But where she was going to sleep?

...Surely not with Twilight, again already after the sleep party on Twilight's bed earlier, and how close a call she had with Applejack today!

"GEROMINO!" Pinkie shouted, doing her anti-gravity thing and bouncing into Twilight's bed, landing down on top of her like a giant slug. Twilight started hyperventilating from having Pinkie so close to her.

Earlier, there was the painkiller Twilight had to blame, but now her mind was clear. And there was nopony in there with them, and unlikely for a pony to walk in.

Twilight reached her hoof up to stroke Pinkie's mane. A gush of air from Pinkie's breath flew into her face, causing her to stop what she was doing.

Pinkie was snoring. She didn't do that last time.

Pinkie was at her most vulnerable right now. Twilight could do...whatever...she...wanted to her without anypony being the wiser.

Twilight was very, very tempted, but resolved not to. Looking at Pinkie's sweet, innocent sleeping face was more then Twilight could take.

Taking one last breath, Twilight tried to fall asleep without taking advantage of her position.




Once more into the breach, though Twilight didn't think it'd be her last time there.

There was nothing noteworthy around in her void tonight. Maybe it was finally turning back to under her control...but Twilight was pessimistic about that possibility.

She ambled about her world, trying to find something. Trying to create something. Trying anything.

She found a stack of hay bales eventually. They were neatly stacked up like cover meant to hide something. Twilight, of course, started shoving the bales on top off so she could see what was in there.

Climbing up on the now-slightly smaller pile, Twilight could see something that just- just- just struck a chord with her.

They were two large ponies made out of baby dandelion petals, grappling and wrestling with each other.

Twilight didn't know why. She wasn't sure why, but something the two fighting was...wrong somehow. They shouldn't have been fighting. Twilight didn't why she knew that, but she did.

"Stop!"

They ignored her.

Twilight crawled and clambered over the crates and ran towards the two of them. "Quit fighting, please!"

They kept on.

Desperate, Twilight threw herself into the fray. The two dandelion ponies pulled out stalks which they threw at each other, causing them to wraparound Twilight's neck. Twilight began gasping for air. The two of them saw they had an unintended victim, and tried to pull their stalks off Twilight's neck. But each tug and jerk only worsened Twilight's suffering. The poor unicorn started choking, and suffocating...




"Aaah!" so screamed Twilight Sparkle as she was brought to the waking world. She saw Pinkie's sleeping innocent face lying on her chest and forgot all about what a terrifying dream she just had. She whimpered again, so wanting for Pinkie to be awake...mostly so she could give Twilight consent.

"Unnh!"

Twilight's whimpering woke Pinkie.

"Oh! Time to get up already?"

Pinkie sat up and took a glance at the window. The sun's rays were beaming through. "I guess so!" she squirmed off Twilight and stood by the bed. "So, what are we gonna do today?"

Twilight shrugged. "I don't know..." She glanced out at the window. Pinkie crawled off her and went back to the floor. Thankfully. Twilight was at the end of her rope for her restraint; any longer and she would started getting cozy. Now she had a moment to rewind her rope back onto her winch.

...That sounded better in her head.

"Mm." Twilight sat up in and rubbed her eyes with her hooves, attempting to remove any remainder of the sandmare's special dust. Once she was done with that, she took another look out the window. The sun was beautiful today, beaming down brilliantly on the town's grass, giving it a relaxing serene glow.

Which was promptly ruined by a spurt of returned memory.

"Ohmigosh! Pinkie! I just remembered! My psychiatric appointment is today!"

Pinkie blinked. "Okay?"

"No, it's not! I don't know whether or not the doctor's will have let me out of here in time to make it!"

Pinkie scratched her chin. "Yeah. I can see why you might worry about that."

"Ah! What are we going to do?" It wasn't likely the psychiatrist would appreciate having been stood up, and Twilight wasn't so maverick as to try to break out the window just to keep an appointment.

"I have an idea!" Pinkie pulled out a kazoo and blew on it quite loudly.

One of the doctor's burst into the room, swinging the door wide open. "Hey! Keep quiet! Some of our patients like to sleep in."

A yellow stallion with an distinctively-built jaw knocked came up behind the doctor at incredible speeds that knocked the doctor down to his belly.

It was Mr. Cake, Pinkie's landlord. (In a manner of speaking.)

"You rang, Pinkie Pie?" Mr. Cake questioned.

"Yep!" Pinkie answered. "My friend Twilight- that's her there- has a appointment with a psychiatrist today. The doctor's are keeping here because she got hurt trying to break up a fight. You think you could do something for her?"

Mr. Cake nodded and saluted. "I'll see what I can do!" he zoomed off as fast and suddenly as he appeared.

The bowled over doctor stumbled to his hooves and sighed, rubbing his temples. "Uhh... I'll leave you two alone."

Twilight narrowed her eyes, suspicious of the doctor's word choice as he left the room. Once he was gone, Twilight laid back down into her bed. Pinkie was standing in the sunbeam from the window and looked radiant in it.

"You look..." Twilight started.

"I looook?" Pinkie questioned.

"...Happy." Twilight finished, detracting her statement from it's original intent and hiding her emotions once more. Twilight fiddled with her hooves uncomfortably.

"Um...Pinkie?"

"Yeah-huh?"

"Where were you when Rainbow Dash and Applejack were carrying me to the doctor's?"

That was a question Twilight had only just now thought of. Pinkie had been on the ceiling and on her tail while in the doctor's office, but when Twilight woke up on their friends' backs mid-transport she couldn't see Pinkie anywhere.

"I was right behind ya!" Pinkie answered with a smile. "I wanted to help carry you, but Applejack said I wasn't strong enough."

Twilight 'hmm'ed and giggled. "I suppose you're not, especially when Dash and Applejack are working together. You know, for a change!"

The two of them laughed at the all-too-true joke. Applejack and Rainbow Dash had a tendency to butt heads over trivial things.

Mr. Cake came back into the room. "What'd I miss?"

"Oh, nothing, Mr. Cake." Twilight said.

"Ah, okay. Anyways, I talked to the therapist and told her what was going on. She said she would be willing to come on by and have the appointment here."

Twilight sprang up out of her bed, her eyes glistening at the prospect of still keeping her appointment that she desperately needed. "Really!?"

"Nope!"

Twilight put on disbelieving expression.

Mr. Cake chuckled awkwardly. "Uh...I was joking. Forgive me...she's right here!" Mr. Cake stepped aside and waved his hoof out as if he was presenting the therapist onto the walkway of a fashion show.

The therapist walked in, a silvery-gray mare with her mane done up in a bun, wearing a brown suit and half-moon spectacles. "Thank you for the lovely introduction, Mr. ... Cake, was it? No hard feelings, but I have to ask you to leave while I speak with my patient."

"I understand. I hope whatever is troubling you gets sorted out, Twilight!" Mr. Caked waved goodbye and closed the door.

"How can you be here?" Twilight questioned. "What about your other patients at the clinic?"

"Ah, they'll be fine." The therapist assured her. "Ponyville is a small, communal town. As long as I'm back before the next appointment, everything will work out all right."

The therapist looked around the room and pulled up a wheeled stool. Then she saw Pinkie Pie in the corner.

"I'm going to have to ask you to leave, too."

Pinkie was offended. "Excuse me, but did you know its Twilight's Week to celebrate her moving to Ponyville?"

"I have...no idea what that means."

"It's okay." Twilight said. "I think it would be better if she was here, too."

The therapist smiled. She appeared to understand that it was nice to keep a friend close every now and then. "Very well." She pulled out a clipboard and pen from her suit. She clicked the latter. "Let's get started, shall we? Now, what is the primary reason you have for scheduling this appointment, Twilight Sparkle?"

Twilight took in a deep breath and signed. "I used to have some control over what I call my void."

The therapist scribbled a quick note on her clipboard. "What is this 'void'?"

"It's, um. Where I have my dreams." Twilight finally admitted. "I used to be able to control it down to the smallest detail, but recently its been doing things on its own."

"Okay." The therapist scribbled some more. She'd probably being doing that after every sentence Twilight said. "Why do you suppose that is?"

"I don't know." Twilight answered.

The therapist adjusted her glasses. "Think, Twilight. At what point did you start losing control?"

Twilight put her hoof to her chin as she pondered. What happened that had caused her control on her void to spiral out of her own control?

...It was Pinkie. Pinkie had started her Celebratory Week. That's when she lost control. Her theory was right: controlling herself around Pinkie had been so taxing that she couldn't command her dream world anymore.

"Well?"

Twilight became ghostly silent. She wasn't willing to admit that to the therapist.

"Let's move on."

The therapist was clearly suspicious of Twilight's suggestion. She was a professional who had been at this long before Twilight had problems; she saw right through the ruse. "Denial is a sign of any number of emotional and mental conflicts and disruptions."

Get out of my head! Twilight thought. Which was silly. The entire point of a therapist was to get inside ponies' heads.

"There's also this...other thing. Recently, when something upsets me, my vision starts getting all white."

"Uh-huh." Scribble, scribble...scribble! "And?"

"Well, I'll...I get comfortable when I can't see anything but a few things, and I start to do things I couldn't do when I thought anypony was watching."

"Uh-hhuuh." The therapist drawled.

"Twilight Sparkle, do you think this white void...could be caused by your...unwillingness to accept reality?"

Everything just went click in Twilight's noggin. That made...very much perfect sense. Twilight didn't like conflict, so when A.J. and R.D. kept fighting, Twilight wanted to deny it...so the white void formed!

Thank you so much, Twilight thought. She was incredibly thankful that the therapist had taken the time out just to come talk to her- and made such an accurate stab at it!

"That's it!" Twilight said. She shirked and blushed a little bit. "I was...never very good at handling situations when I was young."

The therapist made a chuckle of bemusement. "I take that solves all our problems for the day?"

What about the constant wanting for Pinkie Pie, and the fear of what her friends would do if they found what she was thinking? What about that problem? Well?

"I think that will be it today." Twilight reached out of the bed to shake the therapist's hoof. "Thank you so much."

"You're- welcome!" the therapist stuttered, Twilight shaking unnecessarily wildly. They parted hooves, and the therapist left with an awkward last look at Twilight and Pinkie each.

"Well, that was fun." Pinkie said after she left. "I've had better fun, though."

Twilight shook her head at Pinkie's bizarre opinion.

After some meaningless idle chit-chat, the doctor came back and cleared Twilight to leave the office.

"Finally." Twilight expressed at her release. Nopony ever appreciates what they've got until it's gone, like the ability to walk around without being under constant surveillance.

After walking- well, Twilight walked. Pinkie skipped. Twilight asked Pinkie what she wanted to do now that they were free of the doctors... (and Applejack's interrogations.)

"I kinda wanna go to the amusement park."

"Amusement park?"

Ponyville has a an amusement park?

"Yeah! Have you never been to the amusement park before, Twilight?"

Well...no. The amusement park was meant to entertain little fillies, and when Twilight was little filly, she preferred burying her nose into a dusty ancient tome rather than ride on merry-go-round. As a matter of fact, she still did, but could she say no to Pinkie in favor of a book?

Could she choose between her two lov...

Was she even in love with Pinkie? Would that be what this feeling is called? Twilight wasn't good with feelings. She had read enough books on the subject to be able to tell what other ponies were feeling based on the reflection in theirs and the contortion of their muzzles. Her own feelings, less so. It wasn't like there was book on herself, was there?

And if there was, Twilight would have a few choice questions about how the author got their information!

"All right, Pinkie Pie. Let's go to the park."

And evidently, between the lov- whatever this was, Twilight would appear to pick Pinkie Pie over her precious books. Of course she would pick Pinkie Pie. Books don't have feelings.

Pinkie had feelings...

So they walked all the way from one end of Ponyville to the other to find the amusement park. Twilight was willing to skip and bounce right along Pinkie, but Pinkie saw her skipping and slowed down to a walk.

Oh dear...why did she do that? Did she think Twilight looked silly- and not in a good way- when she skipped? Was she doing it 'wrong' somehow?

"You wanna conserve your energy until we actually get there." Pinkie told her.

Oh thank Celestia! Twilight wasn't doing anything wrong at all. Hoo!

Once they arrived at the park, Twilight was a little interested by the flashing light bulbs that spelled out 'Ponyville Amusement Park' in big bright letters. They would flash all together at once, turn off, then slowly light up one-by-one. If nothing else, at it least it was different from just 'flash once', the typical way of doing it, to Twilight's understanding.

"Come on!" Pinkie encouraged her.

"I'm coming, Pinkie. Just hold your horses. Sheesh!"

Twilight and Pinkie paid the ticket attendant some measly bits and were given pink slips that proved they had access to be inside the park.

They were so many lights and sounds for Twilight and Pinkie to investigate. Pinkie picked out the first thing she wanted to do out of a hundred with accuracy like a honed predator. She made a beeline straight for the cotton candy machine that Twilight struggled to keep up with.

"PINKIE! Slow down! I can't catch up!"

Pinkie slowed down and came galloping back towards Twilight. "Sorry. I'm just so excited! Do you know when the last time I went to the park was?"

"No."

"Last week! Last week, Twilight!" Pinkie got up in Twilight's face and stared her down intensely. "That's a whole entire week!"

"Yes, Pinkie." Twilight noted dryly. "A whole week."

Pinkie zoomed off, this time her leg wrapped around Twilight's neck to anchor the unicorn to the Earth pony.

Once they finally arrived at the cotton candy vendor, there was a friendly enough colt manning the station. He was likable enough, which was good for a carnival attendant. He'd get fired if he was too cranky; there were foals visiting, after all.

There were also so many different flavors of cotton candy available! How was Twilight going to choose between any one of them? How was Pinkie!?

"I'll have a- " Pinkie said something incredibly fast, too quickly for Twilight to make out, but the vendor kept on top of it and presented Pinkie with a cone that had a bizarre variety of colors on it which didn't look safe for any living creature to eat.

Naturally, Pinkie started wolfing it down.

The vendor gestured for Twilight to come over and get her own. "What would you like, ma'am?"

"Oh gee..." Twilight muttered, looking at the vast and wide selection of colors. "I don't know. Hmm."
Twilight rubbed her chin in thought, unable to solidly decide on any one flavor.

"Here!" Pinkie offered, clouds of candy sticking to her muzzle. "Try a bite of mine and pick out the flavor from you like best!"

"Oh, gee. Really, Pinkie?"

"Yeah-huh!"

"Thank you! You're so sweet."

Ahhh...any excuse to compliment Pinkie, eh?

Twilight nervously stepped forward and took a bite of Pinkie's cotton candy. The zig-zagging mixture of random different flavors felt tingly on Twilight's tongue, and made it difficult to execute the plan of 'pick out the flavor she liked most.' That couldn't be done very well when she couldn't pick any one flavor out of the twisted mix.

"Bleh..." Twilight said as she drew away. "I'm not sure I even want a cotton candy anymore after that."

Twilight looked at the vendor, who seemed saddened that she was no longer interested in his treats. "Aren't cha gonna eat with yer friend?

Seeing his pout, Twilight's will crumbled.

"I'll have just a plain pink, if you would be so kind."

The vendor cheered up visibly and quickly scooped out a pink cone for Twilight. Twilight took it and went with Pinkie to a bench to eat their candy.

After they were done, Pinkie wanted to go one of the rides.

"Let's go on the roller coaster!"

Twilight was so blinded by Pinkie's lack of foresight she actually closed her eyes before pulling a facehoof. Pinkie wanted to go not just one of the rides, but one of the most stomach-challenging rides ever made? Oh, Pinkie Pie...

"Pinkie, don't you think we should've rode on the coaster before we ate?"

Pinkie stared confusedly, then shook her head as she went "Ooooh! No. It's no fun if there's no risk of getting stomach-sick!"

...As well as dizziness, nausea, and suffering from gyro-gravitational displacement, all of which were things a roller coaster could to do the riders regardless of stomach contents or lack thereof.

"I really don't think it's a good idea to go out on the coaster just yet, Pinkie. Let's wait a little bit."

Pinkie frowned.

Quick, think of something! Twilight didn't want Pinkie to be sad, but she also didn't want to risk vomiting on Pinkie because her stomach was weak.

Was Twilight's stomach weak?

She didn't know. She'd rather it stay that way, as well.

"Come on." Twilight encouraged, hopping off the bench. "Let's do something else while we wait."

So, Twilight had to chaperone Pinkie over to some of the amusement park's other attractions. They went on slow spinning cups, a merry-go-round. And just before Pinkie's patience ran out and she was going to demand to go the coaster, they swung by one of the games where Twilight's hoof was good enough to break enough bottles to win an overly large white stuffed teddy bear. To give Pinkie as a gift, of course.

After that, Twilight was confident her digestive tract would've settled enough to ride the roller coaster.

The two got in line of the roller coaster, and the attendant was happy to let them on one of the middle carts. They had to wait (to Pinkie's increasing annoyance) for the rest of the carts to fill up.

Once they were finished, the attendant shouted to make sure everypony on was ready to move.

"Everypony ready?"

"YEAH!"

As cursory gesture, the attendant pulled the lever, causing the coaster to jerk forward suddenly.

"No." Twilight whispered to herself.

"Goiiiiinng UP!" the attendant pulled the lever the rest of the way, starting the coaster off on its perilous journey upwards, then down, then up, left, right, inwards, southwest...

Thankfully, Twilight's panicked screaming blended into the rest of the riders'

"Calm down, Twi-i-i-ilght!" Pinkie chided over the chorus of fear and adrenaline. "Don't be so scared!"

"I AM SCARED!"

Pinkie signed. "Don't worry, you! Everything will be fine. This roller coaster has a ton of fail-safes!"

"WHY DOES IT NEEE-EEE-ED FAIL-SAFES IN THE FIR-IR-IR-ST PLACE!?"

Pinkie closed her eyes in frustration. "You know what? This calls for desperate measures, Pinkie Pie-style!"

Pinkie reached into some sort of subspace dimensional access port and pulled out a cello- not a violin, not a fiddle, a cello. She started playing a soothing symphony on it, very loudly, so Twilight could hear it over the screaming.

And everything just went...away. There wasn't even Twilight's little white void forming. Everything was still... there. It was just...away. Like the zoom-out function on a telescope.

Throughout the entire remainder of the ride, Twilight couldn't focus on anything except Pinkie's tune.

A few other ponies noticed, and were more bemused than anything. One of them was flabbergasted that Pinkie had the frame of mind to play such a finely-tuned instrument during a roller coaster ride.

Once the ride was finished- which happened quickly because of Twilight's trance, the coaster pulled up to where it was originally parked. A few ponies expressed how Pinkie's cello made sure they weren't going to forget this ride anytime soon.

As all the patrons clambered out, either wanting to get in line for another go or get as far as away as possible, Twilight had to stumble out of her's and Pinkie's seat in a daze.

"Wasn't that fun, Twilight?"

Fun? Maybe... Twilight didn't care. It was worth anything, even a roller coaster ride on a full stomach, to hear Pinkie's music playing.

Pinkie, boundless in her energy, wanted to speed over to another game to play before they went home.

It was a dunk tank.

Pinkie ran up to the attendant and asked if she could be the one being dunked, which was all kinds of weird to both the attendant and Twilight.

Naturally, once Pinkie had bargained her way into the seat, (the stallion already there was eager to not have to be dunked again) Twilight had to be the one to throw the ball.

Twilight didn't want to splash Pinkie Pie into the cold water. How could she do something like that!?

Pinkie gave a few words of encouragement. She was ready to be submerged into the water below.

Twilight eyed the ball warily, then swirled her hoof around to build up momentum. She tossed the ball straight into the center of the target, pulling the release lever and lowering Pinkie inside the tank.

Though Twilight had hesitated to throw the ball, she was glad she did. Pinkie Pie had a certain...appeal while sopping wet, with her hair cascading down her neck...

Pinkie was ready to go home now, though.

(The amusement park didn't have a towel for her to dry off with.)

After everything Twilight went through yesterday, last night, and today, she was too.

So they went back to the library, and after having Spike help Pinkie make tonight's dinner-some sort of foreign dinner pastry- Twilight and Pinkie went to bed.

As they were lying there, Twilight took a glance at Pinkie lying on the opposite bed. Pinkie noticed and glanced back.

"What'cha ya staring at me like that for, Twilight?"

"Nothing." Twilight fibbed. "I just...I'm so glad you're here."

With me.

"I'm glad I'm here too!"

What? Could it be...?

"You know, as opposed to, um...not being...here. You know. Like not existing."

You just had to get my hopes up like that...

Twilight shook her head and rolled over to face away from Pinkie, ready to face her next out-of-control nightmare.

It was better than crying over Pinkie had innocently and unwittingly jerked her heartstrings.
> My Magnetic Personality
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

Twilight 'woke up' in her void on her bed. Looking around, she saw a straw effigy hanging in the air front of her, a few feet away from the foot of her bed. Two braziers were burning to the side of the effigy.

She put her hoof to her mouth, wondering what to do.

A noose dropped down -seemingly- from the sky.

...Ah-ha! She had it!

Using her magic, she lifted the noose and pulled it over the effigy's neck. She tugged at the rope. The effigy flailed and tried to pry the rope off.

Twilight smiled, getting a good feeling. She was quite certain that it had done something awful to deserve this.

But the more it flailed, the more guilty she felt. Yeah, it had done something bad, certainly, but was so bad that it warranted this?

Feeling guilty, she levitated the noose off the effigy,




Today, both Spike and Pinkie got up before her. She sighed when she rose from her covers and saw no trace of beautiful pink in her bed. She did her morning routine and proceed downstairs, where Pinkie and Spike had graciously waited on her for breakfast. She decided she was just going to have cereal today.

Twilight kept her head away from, skewing her face at an angle, wondering what to do about her pink fever.

Suddenly, she had an idea. She hadn't talked to the Princess in awhile...surely, she'd appreciate an update from her faithful student.

"Spike, I want to write a letter to the Princess." Twilight informed him.

"Oh. Okay." Spike produced the quill and paper for the letter. "What do you want it to say?"

"I want to write it myself, Spike. It's...private."

"Private?" Spike moaned. "Oh, come on, Twilight! You know you can't trust me with anything, don'tcha?"

"Yes." Twilight answered slyly, smirking. "So I know I trust my number one assistant to not read anything I don't want him to, right?"

Spike's adopted an expression of surprise, though his ego was stroked. "All right, yeah..."

He walked over the table and gave Twilight the writing instruments. She levitated the quill and began to write.

Dear Princess Celestia...all her official letters started out that way.

Ah, but this wasn't an official letter, was it? No, no. This wasn't a letter from the faithful student to her teacher Celestia. This was a letter from a longing mare to Celestia the olden pony.

Dear Celestia...

You know that I appreciate you sending me to Ponyville to learn about Ponyville.

But recently I've been having strange thoughts about one of my friends. Every time I get near them, something strange stirs up inside me, but I'm afraid of how my friends will react.

Please help.

Twilight.

Twilight folded the letter and put it in the proper binding before giving it to Spike. Spike did his thing, breathing a fwoosh of fire on it and turning it into vapor.

It barely took a minute for there to be a reply.

"Give me that!" Twilight snapped, snatching from Spike's claws quickly before he could untie the binding. Spike scratched his head, wondering what was so important that Twilight couldn't let him see.

She quickly opened the letter and began to read.

Dear Twilight, it began.

It sounds to me as though you are in love. I would recommend you make a move before it's too late, and your special somepony spends their life with someone else.

May I suggest a dress?

Twilight finished reading and slumped against her chair. The letter had put in a thought she never had; that Pinkie could go off and live a happily ever after with somepony else if she didn't do something.

And then there was the fear. The fear of what her friends would do if they found out. The letter had done nothing to help with the fear. In fact, it had encouraged it.

"I don't have anything for us to do today." Pinkie said. "So whatever you want to do is fine."

"I was thinking about maybe seeing Rarity."

Spike perked up at the name of his crush, resting his silverware against the table. Everypony knew about his crush on Rarity.

Twilight giggled. "Yes, Spike. You can come too."

Maybe Twilight could open up to him. He would understand. Ah, but Spike was young, so Twilight didn't trust him much with emotional issues. Besides, that would involve telling somepony about her feelings for Pinkie Pie, and she wasn't ready to do that just yet. With anypony.

She had been thinking about seeing Rarity, though. She had been wanting a dress, and Celestia's recommendation helped with that.

Why?

To look nice.

For Pinkie Pie.




Nothing much happened on their way from the library to the Carousel Boutique, though Pinkie got distracted by a robin.

Once they entered the door, they saw Rarity come out to greet them from another room.

"Welcome to the Carousel Boutique, where everything is sleek, chic and- oh, hello girls! I wasn't expecting you. What I can do for you?"

"I'd like a dress." Twilight told her.

Rarity squealed. It wasn't normal for Twilight to care much about fashion, so the fact she was presented a golden opportunity to Rarity. "Oooh, excellent! I have a fabulous range of colors that I just know would look good on you! This way, please."

Rarity guided them all to her fitting room, and guided Twilight onto a pedestal. Twilight, in her boredom, observed the mannequins all around.

Rarity levitated a tape measure and set it to work to take Twilight's proportions. After taking care of that, Spike attempted to flirt with her, but she shooed him away, forcing Pinkie to assure him it wasn't personal. She was just getting in the zone. Pinkie brought Spike around to the other edge of the room and they began playing while Rarity started to ask Twilight questions.

"Now, what kind of dress would you like, darling?"

"I don't know..." Twilight answered. "One that makes me look...pretty."

"Well, yes, of course, but what do you consider 'pretty'?

"I don't know."

"I don't know..."

I don't know, I don't know, I don't know...Twilight repeated the mantra in her head.

"Well, do you least know what color?"

Darn it, Rarity! How many times are you going to make me say it? I don't know!

Rarity abruptly stopped measuring and put the tape down on her dresser and gave Twilight an accusing look. "Twilight, every question I've asked you, you've answered with 'I don't know'..."

OH, ponyfeathers!

"What's going on?"

Twilight laughed nervously. "What do you mean by that? Nothing's going on."

"Twilight!" Rarity whined. "I'm your friend. You can tell me anything, darling. I won't judge."

Twilight hung her head low and sighed. "Okay...I've been having some...self-esteem issues lately, and I thought a dress might help."

Perhaps not an entirely direct truth, but it was also as least not a total lie.

Rarity laughed. "Oh, darling! Only you can improve your self-esteem!"

"Did you get that out of a magazine?"

"What? No!" Rarity denied, thought Twilight could hear the hum of her horn followed the ruffling of paper. "Now, promise you'll give up on this ridiculous idea that a dress will just magically solve your issue."

"Okay...I still want a dress, though."

"As you wish, you little self-doubter, you! What would you like?"

Twilight raised her head and glared, provoked by Rarity's prodding. She knew what she wanted, and she was going to let her know it in no uncertain terms.

"I want a dress that's...grey." Rarity picked up a bundle of light gray cloth. "Dark grey." Twilight corrected. Rarity swapped it out for a more appropriate bolt of fabric.

"I want...stars." Twilight declared. Rarity picked up her scissors and began cutting the cloth. "And a moon- full moon, not crescent." Snip, snip, snip.

"And I want...ruffles on the back that will billow when the wind blows and make me look..."

Twilight paused.

"Irresistible."

"Done, and done!" Rarity declared.

Sometime later, Twilight was standing on the pedestal in her new dress. It was dark grey, like she wanted, but Rarity had gotten clever and filled in the stars and moon with the light grey that Twilight said to put away. And there were indeed many ruffles towards the backs, hanging off from her haunches that would like impressive once the wind start to blew on them.

"It's perfect, Rarity. How much do I owe you?"

"Oh, darling!" Rarity said dramatically, waving a hoof. "You don't owe me anything. Consider it a personal favor."

"Okay..." Twilight muttered, hopping off the pedestal. "Spike! Pinkie! We're done here!"

"Oh, yippie!" Pinkie cried, rushing over to hug Twilight. "The air was starting get stale in here."

Twilight spasm-ed, unprepared to hold back her moan from Pinkie's touch. She bit her lip, trying to contain it. As result, she produced a weird sound through her nose.

Rarity voiced her concern. "Err, are you all right, darling?"

"Yeah. I'm fine."

That's IT! I'm going to find a spell for this!

"Come on, you two. We're going back to the library."

"Ooh!" Spike groaned. "We're not gonna spend all day reading in that stuffy place, are we, Twi?" He gestured to the windows. "It's a beautiful day out there!"

"I want to research something, Spike, and yes, we will spend all day in there if that's what it takes to find it!" Twilight snapped, re-establishing the pecking order.

"Oh, come on! Can't we do something? Maybe visit Fluttershy? We haven't see her in awhile..."

Twilight paused and thought about it.

"We'll go the library, and when we find what I'm looking for, we'll go to Fluttershy's."

"Yes!" Spike pumped his fist, seeing he had talked Twilight out of spending the entirety of this great day indoors.




Piles of books were stacked on piles of books as Twilight scavenged through her collection, trying to find it.

"Twilight," Spike asked as he ducked to avoid another book sent flying by Twilight's searching, "What are we even looking for?"

"A magnet spell." Twilight answered. "But I can't seem to find it anywhere in here!"

Like a gopher coming out of its hole, Pinkie Pie Popped out of a book pile and offered Twilight a book. "Here ya go!"

It was a book about magnets. Twilight took the book from Pinkie and began reading. Of course. The spell involving magnets would only be in the book about magnets, not magic. Pushing her aside frustration at this, she read the spell and memorized it.

"Pinkie, would you mind helping me test this spell?"

"Oh, oh!" Pinkie squealed. "I love testing stuff! Especially stuff that's dangerous and untested and likely to go horribly wrong!"

Twilight smiled nervously. "Well, the book doesn't say anything about something going horribly wrong."

Pinkie frowned at the removal of potential danger, which pierced Twilight's heart painfully.

Twilight decided to throw her a bone. "But, I've never done it before, so maybe something will go wrong!"

Pinkie smiled and clapped her hooves.

A beam of magic began to spool from the tip of Twilight's horn and float towards Pinkie. It began enveloping her, wrapping around like a towel, before just...disappearing. It almost seemed like nothing had happened.

"Now, could you come over here and hug me, Pinkie?"

"Sure!" Pinkie answered with a smile. She stretched her hooves and walked towards Twilight, but when she got close, some invisible force began pushing her away from Twilight's body, almost like a magnet.

Pinkie tried to get close to Twilight again, but the same thing happened.

Twilight smiled. No more nearly losing control from Pinkie's touch anymore... "Come on. We can got to Fluttershy's now.




So, they went to Fluttershy's house. A wooden cottage out on the farthest outskirt of town where nopony could bother her, fitting with her shy nature. A small ramp led up to the door.

They climbed up it, and Spike knocked on the door. The door pulled open to reveal a very grumpy looking bunny rabbit, who glared at them all like he wanted to pick a fight with them.

"Uh...hello." Spike greeted, unnerved by its beady little eyes. "We're friends of Fluttershy's. We came over to see her?"

The rabbit glared at them, then shut the door in their face. Twilight's ears perked up at a small sound.

Spike huffed. "Well, that was rude!"

"Quiet!" Twilight snapped at him. "I can hear something..."

Twilight strained her ears, able to hear something going on the other side of the door. Eventually, the door opened just barely, allowing them to see the faintest edge of Fluttershy's face.

"Oh...hello girls." Fluttershy greeted them. "I wasn't expecting you..."

"Yeah! It's been awhile since we saw each other!"

"Okay...um, nice seeing you." Fluttershy, in her shyness, started to edge the door shut, but Spike stuck his foot in it.

"Aren't ya gonna invite us? Not letting us in when we came all this way just to see you is awfully rude, you know."

Fluttershy gasped, the idea of being rude to her friends being an absolutely dreadful thought. "Oh no, I'm so sorry!" Fluttershy opened the door wide. "Please, come in."

Twilight, Spike, and Pinkie all entered the house. It was quaint, very sparse in its decorations. Fluttershy guided them to her living room, where they saw that rabbit again.

"Was Angel rude to you at the door?"

"Now that you mention, yeah." Spike answered, glaring at the rabbit.

"I'm sorry. He's just trying to protect me. He knows how...fragile I am." Fluttershy whisped. "Can I get you some tea?"

"That would be lovely, Fluttershy." Twilight answered.

Fluttershy left the room. The knowledge they were Fluttershy's friend seemed to make Angel not want to pick a fight with them...but he still looked like a crabby little grouch.

Fluttershy returned, carrying full teacups for all three of them. She gave Spike his, and Pinkie hers, and handed the last one to Twilight.

"Thank you, Flutterhsy." Twilight said as Fluttershy gave her the cup. Fluttershy's hoof wrapped around Twilight's.

"...Fluttershy, you can let go now."

"Oh..." Fluttershy moaned sadly. "That trip to the spa didn't do anything for you, did it?"

"W-what do you mean?"

"You're so tense! If I didn't know better, I'd say you were about to snap like a spring! Is something stressing you out?"

"I am not stressed!" Twilight yelled, throwing her tea cup to the floor, where it shattered and spilled.

Pinkie and Spike glared.

"Okay...maybe a little."

Fluttershy looked to Angel as if asking for permission. Angel crossed his paws and nodded.

"Follow me, please."




So, they had to follow Fluttershy following a deer through the woods outside her house until they came to a rocky clearing. There was a large pond with a waterfall flowing into it, and rocks were scattered around.

"Whenever I get stressed, I just come here." Fluttershy explained. "There's just something about this place that makes all your worries go away."

Ha. Twilight laughed in her head. Unless this place was magic, she doubted it would make her worries go away.

"Wait right here, please." Fluttershy asked them before picking a up bucket that was already and started to lift up the various rocks.

Twilight and Spike sat down on large seat-sized rocks, but when Pinkie come over to join them, she was pushed away from Twilight by the spell Twilight cast earlier.

Twilight smirked to herself. There was no way Pinkie could touch her now.

...There was no way Pinkie could touch her now.

T-there's...no way for Pinkie to touch me now...

Twilight looked to Pinkie, who seemed to look sad about not being able to get close to her friend. Twilight realized she wouldn't be able enjoy Pinkie's touch...her soft, soft fur.

She had read the counterspell in the book. She always did, just in case something went terribly wrong. She got ready to cast it before realizing there was no way for her to do without looking suspicious.

She quickly realized she needed a distraction. Something to keep everypony's attention so she could cast the counterspell without anypony noticing and asking questions.

She looked at one of the rocks and thought about skipping across the water...no, no. Fluttershy would get onto her for abusing a poor, defenseless rock like thought.

Looking around at the trees, she thought of an idea she thought was better, even though a sane pony would realize it was actually worse.

Getting up and away from Pinkie and Spike, she activated her magic and began to pull on one of the trees, making it bend and sway to her will. She made the top of it smack against the pond, causing a huge splash that washed that over Pinkie and Spike. While they were busy reacting to the splash, she cast the counterspell under the cover of the water.

Fluttershy didn't notice anything. The splash hit up against a rock and flew over her harmlessly. She stopped, thinking she heard something, but shrugged it off and continued what she was doing.

Come over and touch me, Pinkie Pie...it doesn't even have to be intimate, just let me know I can still FEEL you...

"Okay!" Fluttershy exclaimed. "Twilight, could you go and stand under the waterfall, please?"

Twilight was confused, not seeing what good that would do, but complied. Stepping into the cool pond, she sat under the waterfall. The water falling off the ledge above and onto her back felt strangely good.

"Now, close your eyes..." Fluttershy instructed.

Twilight obliged. She felt something fall on her back, but kept her eyes closed. At least, until she felt something wiggling on the bridge of her nose. She opened her eyes to see it was a caterpillar.

"...Fluttershy, there is a caterpillar on my nose."

Fluttershy giggled.

"There are caterpillars all over you, Twilight!"

"What!?" Twilight shrieked, though she managed to keep still to avoid flinging off the caterpillars and hurting them.

"I've spent a lot of time training them to use their wiggling movements to relax ponies." Fluttershy explained. "They're really quite good at it."

Twilight was dubious of it, but the longer she was there, the more she felt the caterpillars crawled around her body. It really was quite relaxing. Like a thousand tiny masseuses each dedicated to messaging specific portions of her skin.

"Now...go to sleep."

"What!?"

"It really helps to take a nap." Fluttershy explained. "Go to sleep, Twilight."

"No!"

Fluttershy sighed. She cleared her throat and began to sing. "Hush now, quiet now, it's time go to sleep."

"Fluttershy, stop! You don't...understand."

"Hush now, quiet now, leave the exciting day behind you. Hush now, quiet now, let the joy of dreamland find you."

Joy!? Hahahaha, poor Fluttershy. There was no way for her to know that dreamland had been full of anything but joy for Twilight the last few weeks.

Twilight tried to stay awake. Tried to keep her getting heavier eyelids open, but between the cool water, the caterpillar masseuses, and Fluttershy's lullaby...

Resistance was futile.



Twilight opened her eyes to see...the pond, Fluttershy, and the trees around the pond.

"FINALLY!" Pinkie exclaimed. "We've been sitting here for half an hour now!"

"Half an hour?" Twilight muttered. Was she really asleep that long? How did she not go to her void?

"I'll bet you're wondering why you didn't have dreams right now, aren't you?" Fluttershy asked.

Yes...hey, how did Fluttershy know that?

"Y-yeah. How'd you know?"

"It's this place." Fluttershy explained. "There's just something about that keeps you from dreaming, it's very relaxing."

Twilight cricked her neck. Now that she thought about it, she did feel quite relaxed. The most at ease she felt in weeks. In fact, if Princess Celestia was to drop down from the sky out of nowhere and give a her a pop quiz, she was sure she could answer it without panicking.

"So, since we've just been sitting here for the last thirty minutes, can we go do something fun?" Spike asked, irritated.

"Yeah!" Pinkie agreed.

Twilight thought about it. She was feeling good, so she was up to anything. Perhaps they could go to Sugercube Corner...surely, Mr. and Mrs. Cake would appreciate an update as to how their top baker was doing.

"Come on. Let's go get some sweets."

Both Pinkie and Spike expressed quite well their approval for this idea.




They left Fluttershy's pond place and started making their way across town. Along their way, Twilight noticed a rather dapper looking colt with a gray coat and black hair dressed in a suit. She didn't think much of him, but then she noticed Pinkie glaring at him rather intently.

"What are you staring at Pinkie?"

"Him." Pinkie pointed. "See him? That's the businesspony who tried to buy Sugercube Corner."

Twilight's jaw dropped, and she joined Pinkie in glaring at him. Suddenly, the pony that she didn't think much of was suddenly the target of all her ire and rage. They kept glaring at him until they couldn't see him anymore, and they reached the Corner shortly after.

They entered and saw Mrs. Cake managing the counter, looking surprised to see them. "Oh, hello girls! What are you doing here?"

"What else? We're here to get some sweets, of course!" Twilight explained.

"Oh, well, we have a quite selection, so take your time."

Twilight raised her hoof, but stopped and looked at Spike. She needed to order she, him, and Pinkie could all agree with no argument or disagreement.

"Do you have some chocolate cupcakes?"

"You're in luck!" Mrs. Cake exclaimed. "We just finished making a fresh batch."

She ducked down and pulled out a tray of chocolate-brown cupcakes that kinda looked more like muffins. Twilight gave Mrs. Cake the bits for them and took the tray. The group found themselves a table and took their seats. Twilight began divvying up the pastries evenly amongst them.

As they sat there, munching their way though the chocolate, Twilight started thinking about her dreams, reflecting on them with a clarity from Fluttershy's therapy. She eventually started to notice something about them...

Today, the sixth day, she had the dream about the effigy...which was kinda like when she tried to choke that stallion on the second day.

On the third day, she had dreamed about the cart, and on the fourth day, she gone on a roller coaster with Pinkie Pie and dreamed about two ponies fighting...like when Applejack and Rainbow Dash fought each other...

On the second day, she had a dream about pulling into water against her will, which was kinda like Flutterhsy making her sleep in the pond today...

Everything that happened in her dreams happened in some weird round-a-bout fashion on the day of her Celebratory Week opposite the day she had the dream on!

It made sense. If her dreams could see the future, why wouldn't they be able to see it from a slightly skewed angle?

Which meant that her dream where the mannequin made out with her was going to come true in some way tomorrow! Oooh...not good.

The door to Sugercube Corner rang, signaling the approach of a potential customer. Twilight and Pinkie looked over to see it was the businesspony from earlier. He approached their table. Pinkie crossed her front legs at him.

"Miss Pinkie Pie?" He greeted. "I know that you have no reason to want anything to do with me, but I would like you to hear me out."

"Go on..." Pinkie said, with a look that made it clear she was willing to listen, but only temporarily.

"I've been engaging in some very unprofessional stalker-ish behavior as of late, observing from you afar." The businesspony explained. "I've consulted with a professional therapist, and we've reached the conclusion there is only one thing to do..."

The businesspony backed away from the table and bowed his head.

"Miss Pinkie Pie...would you do me the honor of going on a date with me?"

Twilight's eyes widened. She buried her head in hooves and slumped against the dinner table.

What did I do to deserve this?
> Volatile Chemical Reaction, Part 1
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

What did I do to deserve this?

Twilight was wondering this, asking herself over and over again. Hoping that maybe one of the voices in her head would give an answer. Any answer. Even a poor, ill-thought out one that fell apart in the face of logic. But no, no such revelation.

Twilight's narrowed her eyes, realizing who was at fault for her woes.

Fluttershy! You made the voices in my head shut up!

Most ponies would think that voices in their heads being silenced was a good thing. But a pony doesn't really appreciate what they've got until it's gone. Twilight was certainly having that feeling.

Of course, Fluttershy wasn't really to blame for all of Twilight's problems. It was the businesspony, wasn't it? He was asking Pinkie Pie on a date! Her Pinkie Pie! Her little...cupcake. Hnn. She supposed if she was going to try to blame somepony, she might as well blame Pinkie Pie for...for...for being so beautiful...

All the clarity and cleared thoughts Twilight had received from the thirty minute nap under the waterfall was going to be sapped in two minutes if this businesspony didn't go away.

Pinkie had her lips turned away as she thought over the businesspony's request.

Okay, okay...Twilight took in some deep breaths. Pinkie was going to think about it, and ultimately say no and send the businesspony on his way.

The bell on the entrance to the bakery rang,

Oh...no. Twilight facehooved. Her hopes were about to dashed, she was certain.

A white unicorn that almost resembled a marshmallow darted inside the bakery, whipping her head around like a tiger on the hunt. Rarity.

"Where is he? Where is he!?"

Twilight, of course, knew what she was here for. She was going to try to get the businesspony interested in her dresses. Probably get close to him, and maybe cozy up. Possibly flirt with him, if she thought she could cross that line.

Rarity saw him and smiled to herself. She bounced her curls and strutted towards him with her head held high.

"Hello, sailor!" Rarity greeted. The businesspony turned to face her with confusion.

"Do I...know you?"

"Oh, we've met. I understand if you don't remember me, though. I wasn't that memorable."

"Oh! Oh, yes. You were one of Miss Pie's friends here, weren't you?"

"Yes! So, what are you doing here?" Rarity questioned, curling her eyebrows subtly, but flirtatiously.

"I was asking Miss Pinkie out on a date." The businesspony answered.

"Oh, that's nice...what?" Rarity's eyes went blank, trying to comprehend the businesspony's insane logic as to why he would ask messy Pinkie Pie out. Then she got this other look in her eyes. One Twilight picked up on.

Rarity had better not be thinking what Twilight thought was thinking...

Rarity, if you're going to do what I think you are, I am going to...to...

To what, exactly? Hurt her? That would alienate her from all her friends. Insult her? That would just engage them in a war of words.

"Uh, this may sound strange." Rarity said airily. "But perhaps you'd let me talk to our dear Miss Pinkie before you make any plans?"

The businesspony raised an eyebrow. It was indeed sounding strange. But he nodded and left the building.

"Pinkie Pie, might I make a request?"

Pinkie blinked. "What?"

"Please go out on this date with him!" Rarity exclaimed.

Pinkie and Spike stared blankly, befuddled while Twilight fumed and raged internally. Rarity was doing exactly what Twilight was fearing! She was going to talk Pinkie into going on this date...while, of course, wearing one of Rarity's dresses to impress the Canterlot pony.

"Why?" Pinkie questioned.

"She wants you to be a commercial for her dresses!" Twilight snapped, pounding her hoof into the table.

Everypony stared. Rarity chuckled airily and nervously.

"What? No, no..." Rarity tsked.

Twilight let out an absolutely bestial growl. "Gnrrrr!"

Rarity backed away. "All right, I confess! I want Pinkie to go out with him so he'll see the dress I will make just for the occasion and be impressed!"

Pinkie put her hoof to to her mouth in apprehension, unsure of what to do about the entire situation. On top of that, Spike had noticed Twilight's outburst.

"Are you all right, Twilight?" Spike asked, grabbing Twilight's hoof to support her.

Twilight shook her head. "No, I...I've been worrying so much lately, and now..."

That business pony and Rarity are working together to take Pinkie Pie away from me! Twilight hissed mentally.

"Pinkie, listen to me. You don't have to do anything on this date." Rarity said. "Just go out and eat dinner with him. That's all you have to do."

Twilight narrowed her eyes and growled.

"But-but it's Twilight's Celebratory Week! I'm supposed to spend the rest of today and tomorrow with her, not some-random businesspony so you can advertise your dress!"

Rarity faltered, realizing she had been somewhat disrespectful to Pinkie's customs. Twilight smiled and relaxed a little bit. Pinkie wasn't going to leave her... yet.

"Well, uh..." Rarity stammered, still not ready to give up her ambitions. "Twilight could chaperone!"

Chaperone? Really? That's what Rarity comes up with?

Pinkie scratched her chin. "That might work..."

"Excellent! If you'll come to the Boutique, we'll get started on an excellent new dress for you..."

"Okay...can we finish our cupcakes first, though?"

Rarity nodded, and went outside to see if she could still find the businesspony.

"I haven't agreed to any of this." Twilight Sparkle reminded them before muffling herself with a bite of cupcake. Nom nom nom.




After finishing that, they went back to the Carousel Boutique, where Rarity spirited Pinkie Pie away into the fitting room, masking the both of them behind some sort of fancy over-sized shower curtain. Twilight was left outside to watch while hearing the sounds of of cloth being Rarefied.

"Is the curtain really necessary. Rarity?" Twilight questioned, a little upset that she couldn't see or touch Pinkie Pie.

"Normally, I'd agree with you, darling. But these are special circumstances- hold still!" Rarity answered, having to scold Pinkie mid-sentence.

"I can't help it!" Pinkie yowled. "Being still is boring!"

"Perhaps, but be patient! You DO want this dress to look nice, don't you?"

Don't you mean you want this dress to look nice, Rarity? Twilight thought.

"Done!" Rarity exclaimed with pride at last. Rarity pulled the curtain away, allowing Pinkie in her new dress to be seen by the world.

Twilight's eyes nearly popped out of their sockets.

It was a very, very nice dress. Nicer than the one Twilight had made for herself.

Black crisscrossing straps were on Pinkie's legs. They reached further up on her hind legs and went further up than on her front ones. Cut cloth like tarps were divided in two on her back, one over her rear and haunches, the other around her neck. The one on her rear reached over her Cutie Mark, covering it slightly, leaving only the strings of the balloons visibly, teasing as just what the strings were connected to. Her mane was braided just, just slightly, and put on the left of her face. Rarity had also seen fit to give Pinkie some black stripes leading to her chest that alternated, revealing her skin, but also covering it. There was one of those, those, uh, neck thingies furled around Pinkie's neck, kinda making her look like a vampire.

It was too much for Twilight to handle. The dress was specifically designed to tease, and it did that job well. Twilight was going to start panting any minute now if she didn't do something.

She dashed for the door, as getting out of the room was the first thought she had.

"Twilight!" Pinkie exclaimed. She jumped off Rarity's pedestal and dashed after Twilight. Before Twilight could escape through the doors of the Carousel Boutique and ruin her own Week, Pinkie tackled her to the ground.

"What's wrong, Twilight?"

Rarity stepped into the room. "Indeed. Do you not like the dress?"

"Uh, um...oooh." Twilight stammered, unable to think with Pinkie Pie lying right on top of her. "Pinkie, could you..."

Take me here and now!

"Maybe get off me?"

"Sure!" Pinkie trawled off Twilight.

Twilight looked at her friends looking down at her. Rarity was still clearly waiting for an answer from Twilight. Pinkie was half-smiling, hoping Twilight was okay.

Twilight sighed. "Can we go home, Pinkie?"

Pinkie nodded. Pinkie gave Twilight her hoof and helped pull her up to her own hooves. The two of them began their trot towards the exit of the Boutique while Rarity waved them off uncertainly, unsure of what just happened.

"Have a nice day...?" The marshmallow muttered, waving her hoof goodbye.

"So, what was that all about, Twilight?" Pinkie asked once they were outside the Boutique. Twilight kept her gaze on the ground, not wanting to look at Pinkie Pie at the moment. Partially because she didn't want to be nearly overcome with lust again. Partially because she didn't want to face the bizarre thing she just did. From an observer's standpoint, she had run out of the room and then didn't explain why she ran out of the room.

"...I don't want to talk about it." Twilight murmured quietly.

"Okie-dokie-lokie." Pinkie said, a note of sadness in her voice. Twilight knew why it was there. Pinkie was sad that she couldn't help Twilight with whatever was troubling the unicorn.

Mustering a great amount of courage, Twilight raised her head up to look at her friend. Pinkie looked back, an oblivious smile on her face. There was a slight shimmer to it, though. A crease in a certain direction that said "You can tell me anything."

"I..." Twilight said, almost ready to confess. To drop the charade, the not-quite-lies, the control, and the masks right then, there, here, now. "...I want to know why you agreed to do this. To go on this date."

Almost, but not quite there yet.

"Oh, well that's easy!" Pinkie exclaimed. "Because if I didn't, that would make Rarity disappointed, and disappointed is way, way WAY too close to sad and-"

"You don't like making ponies sad." Twilight repeated Pinkie's oft-repeated mantra.

"Mm-hm!" Pinkie reassured with an affirmative nod.

The two of them retrieved Spike and headed back to the library, where Twilight Sparkle brushed her teeth and hair and tucked in early. She was going to need a very large amount of sleep to deal with tomorrow...




"Mmmmm..." Twilight moaned once she entered her void. Her sanctuary that had been lost had returned to its proper status. The dreams she had that turned into nightmares she feared. They were so much more preferable to what was waiting for her on the opposite end of tomorrow. She saw the mannequin, standing shyly next to a wheeled stool like the ones doctors use.

Twilight could easily put two and two together. She was a mathematical genius, after all. This was the event at the doctor's where Twilight had to decide whether or not Pinkie could play on the stool or not.

Remembering what had happened at the doctor's in the real world, Twilight trotted up to the mannequin and wrapped her hoof around its.

Like in the doctor's office, Twilight didn't want to let go. But where she hadn't let go of Pinkie's because she didn't want Pinkie to let go. Here, she was holding so tightly because she really, really, really did not want to wake up and face the horror awaiting her tomorrow night.

To face Pinkie going out on a date with that agreeable-enough stallion whom was the face of soulless corporation. What if Pinkie Pie liked him? What if he wooed her? Worse yet, what if the date went well, but the businesspony decided he didn't like Pinkie Pie as much as he thought he did, while Pinkie, in turn, fell for him!? She would be crushed, if that happened!

...As unlikely as it was to. But Twilight needed to be able to prepare for any eventuality, any possibility.

On top of all that, there was her first dream's events to consider. Where the mannequin engaged her in a furious make-out session without her consent. In what sense would that come true? Sure, there was some leeway between what happened in the dream and what happened in real life, but still...would Twilight lose her composure and do that to Pinkie in front of the businesspony to show him Pinkie was hers, not his or anypony else? Would the businesspony do it to Pinkie?

Worse yet, would she do it, not because she wanted to show the businesspony Pinkie was hers...

But because she had finally cracked?





Twilight grunted when she woke up. She didn't want to be up today. Not today. Not this day of all days. If there was something, anything she could do to make this day not happen or- somehow remove herself from it, that would be grand. Maybe she could talk Spike through making a sleeping potion and have him give it to her so she couldn't attend the date. Maybe she could talk him through it to make enchanted, like the princess in the fairy tale, so that she wouldn't wake up until her true love kissed her. (The enchantment would be rigged to make it so that 'true love' meant "Pinkie Pie" of course.)

Hmm...if she did that, there would not be any guarantee Pinkie Pie would be the one to kiss her unless she explicitly told Spike as such.

Perhaps she could find a monster that would turn her into stone long enough for her to miss the date.

Maybe she could revisit her voices' suggestion of taking an entire bottle of medicine and killing herself...no, no. Better idea! Taking a particular combination of medicines which would put her in state of not-quite-death that she could come of once the date was over. Or possibly suffocate herself with her pillow. Or strangle herself with her blanket. Or bury herself under a book fort and asphyxiate herself under its weight. Or maybe, just maybe, she could write the Princess and get a ridiculously long homework assignment that would keep her from going to the date.

...That's actually a fairly good idea. Spike! Where was Spike? SPIKE! Get over here!

"What?" Spike asked, sorely rubbing his newly opened eyes. "Twilight, what time is it?"

Oh... that was a good point. Would Celestia be up by now? Twilight looked outside at the window. The sun was up. Of course! How could Twilight be so stupid? The sun was up, therefore Princess Celestia was up. Celestia raised the sun. How would've the sun rose if Celestia wasn't up!?

Celestia might have been having a problem like Twilight, and asked Luna to raise the sun today so she could sleep in. That was one way. How likely was that, though?

"I want you to write a letter to the Princess, Spike." Twilight said.

"At..." Spike picked up a clock. His weary eyes blinked, and he tossed the clock away. "Whatever time it is!?"

"Yes." Twilight answered without a hint of irony or sarcasm.

"Uggh!" Spike picked up the utensils for writing the letter. "What do you want to say?"

Twilight levitated the tools of Spike's claws. "It's private."

Spike glared. "You've been sending a lot of private letters lately...and if it's private, why did you wake me up!?"

Twilight glared at him imperiously, telling him instantly he was out of line. "I still need you to send it."

Twilight began writing out the letter, spell-checking every word twice individually, then checking punctuation. All while occasionally looking to see Pinkie still asleep on the bed set up for her.

Dear Celestia,

The pony that I mentioned to you in our last correspondence is now going out on a date as a favor to one of my other friends. I've been invited to chaperone, and for a Ponyville custom I don't want to bore you with, I have to stay with the pony. But I don't think I can stand to see her

Twilight glared at her letter. She drew the ink over the word 'her' over and over until it was totally obscured by ink and wrote 'them' instead. Anything she said that could've narrowed down the pony of her affections was unacceptable.

Them with this other pony on a date! Can you help? Maybe send me a long assignment?

Twilight re-read the letter over and over at least three times before deciding it was ambiguous enough while getting her point across. She gave it to Spike, giving the order for him not to read it. Using "Ponyville custom" was an excellent way to refer to her Week Pinkie was celebrating.

A minute later, there was a reply. Twilight snatched it out of the air before Spike could even realize he had belched it out. She unfurled and was incredibly distraught by her mentor's reply.

Wouldn't giving you this assignment mean breaking the custom you mentioned? Or that you would have to take with it you during your chaperoning?

Twilight blinked. She blinked again. She blinked one more time before reading it again and again...and again...and again...and again.

Her own brilliant scheme had been undone by her brilliant way of not revealing what was keeping her tied to Pinkie. D'oh!

Twilight read it one more time. This time, she was so infuriated by it that she used her magic to set aflame and let its ashes fall to the floor.

Spike stared worriedly as the black remnants of the paper fell down. "Are you...okay, Twilight?"

Twilight whipped around to look at him. Her eye twitched. Her tail perked up in a way that was very not perky. She was ready to scream at him and break down there.

NO, SPIKE. I AM NOT FINE. THE PONY WHO I'VE BEEN UNABLE TO STOP THINKING ABOUT IS ABOUT TO GO ON A DATE AND I COULD LOSE MY CHANCE TO BE WITH HER FOREVER.

"I'm FINE." Twilight hissed at him.

"You sure?" Spike asked.

Twilight grimaced at him.

Neither of them notice Pinkie pop out of her covers, mistaking the smell of the paper burning as somepony starting -and burning- breakfast.

Spike was putting his claws together and smiling forcefully, quite rightfully fearful of whatever Twilight might do because of his idiocy in asking if she was sure she was fine.

"...Come here, Spike." Twilight told him. Spike was hesitant. (Who wouldn't be!?) but complied, approaching Twilight. Twilight wrapped her front leg around him and started petting the scales on his head like a puppy.

"Twilight, what are you doing?" Spike asked. It was a good question, but the answer was obvious, wasn't it?

"I'm petting you, Spike." Twilight answered, with an unnerving stoniness in her tone. Spike could tell she was on the verge of some sort of breakdown. He'd be more at ease knowing which sort, though. If he knew what whether it was a 'The Princess is visiting' or 'I'm about to be late for my homework' type, it'd be easier to safeguard her against herself. "Do you not like being petted?"

"Well, no-" Spike answered, but the instant he formed the consonant, Twilight adjusted her technique, causing him to change his mind. "Yes!" He made an indistinct noise of contentment and buried his head in Twilight's breast.

Twilight continued to glare out the window, her mind incomprehensible to even herself. She continued stroking Spike's scales for a while. Twilight stopped, gave Spike a proper hug, then lifted him up onto her back.

"Spike, could you wrap your tail around the base of mine?" Twilight requested.

"Uh...okay." Spike said, attempting to curl his tail around the base of Twilight's as instructed. He eventually managed.

"Now pull." Twilight instructed.

Spike raised an eyebrow, but did his best to do so. The feeling of Spike's muscular (for his size), cool, scaly reptilian tail pulling directly at the hairs in her Cutie Mark was relaxing to Twilight.

Twilight took in a deep breath and sighed. "Thank you, Spike. You can stop now, if you'd like, but if you want to keep going, it's fine."

"Okay..." Spike eyed the knot of tails, and started experimenting with different ways of looping it.

"So..." Pinkie said after the tension in the room had passed. "Breakfast?"

Twilight looked to Spike. Spike saluted and hopped off her back. "I'm on it!" He scampered down the stairs. Twilight sat down on all fours, admiring Pinkie as she yawned and stretched.

"So, what do you want to do today?" Pinkie asked.

Take you under my bed and stamp MIIINE! on your chest in sparkling beads. Twilight thought.

I want to wake up in the morning with my nose next to yours.

I want us to argue late at night at whose turn is it to wash the dishes.

I want to go to bed, secure in the knowledge your tail will be twisted around mine in a mess.

I want you to not go that date. Forget about Rarity. Rarity doesn't love you. I'm sorry. I shouldn't say that. She does love you...but she doesn't love you the way I do. She won't hold you the way I will. She won't protect you the way I will. She won't...TREAT you the way I will.

"I..." Twilight started. She was ready to shout.

"DON'T GO ON THIS DATE WITH THAT BUSINESSPONY!"

Pinkie stared blankly. But not the way a pony would stare at a friend whose yelled. The way a pony stared at a...CRAZY pony.

"Twilight, why is your mouth open if you're not talking?"

What? Not talking!? But...but...she was so sure she'd yelled that so loud the HEAVENS could have heard her! Why...!?

"Spike!" Twilight shouted, looking for a new topic. Deflecting, as psychologist called it. "Is breakfast ready yet?"

"No!" Spike shouted back with exasperation. "Hold your ponies, Twilight! Geez!"

Twilight frowned, unsure of what her next move should be. Of what it could possibly be.

Twilight and Pinkie laid in the bed, staring at one another with totally different emotions behind their glares. Pinkie's, it was excitement at a brand new day and slight confusion towards Twilight's behavior. Twilight's, a visor, a pair of sunglasses, or lenses trying to hide the emotional whirlwind swirling inside her head. Hiding, that all she wanted to do was just hold Pinkie's hoof and never, ever have to let go. To stop the clock. Not just stop it, but shove a metal pole so far up its gears that its grandchildren clocks (pun not intended) would feel it.

"Breakfast is done!" Spike shouted. Pinkie and Twilight both got off the bed and headed down for some of Spike's pancakes. Pinkie and Spike eat the way they always did. Messily. Like pigs. Or slobs. Happily. Like pigs rolling in mud. Or children. Twilight, however, merely levitated a fork at her pancake, scooping off little bites so tiny in mass and diameter she could barely nibble on them.

"Seriously, Twi." Spike said, noticing Twilight's eating pattern. "If there's something wrong..."

Everything is wrong, Spike.

"Just...tell me, okay? If not me, then Rainbow Dash or Applejack or anypony. We're your friends, but we can't help you if we don't know what's going on."

Twilight merely scraped at her plate. "Thanks, Spike."

The cogs in Twilight's head started turning again, freshly oiled by Spike's suggestion. "You know what? Maybe Applejack can help. We'll drop by after breakfast."

"N'okay." Pinkie agreed through a mouthful of pan-cooked pastry.

After they finished eating- well, after Pinkie and Spike finished eating. It was questionable whether Twilight had even started at all- Twilight went to the bathroom to brush her mane. Pinkie followed, of course. Twilight offered the brush to Pinkie.

Do you want me to do that for you?

No thanks. I got it.

After Pinkie...made motions that could be mistaken for brushing her mane at a distance, Twilight was ready to head to Sweet Apple Acres. She and Pinkie went out, locking the door behind them as they left Spike alone. Twilight maintained her usual trot while Pinkie bounced. They arrived to find Applejack bucking apple trees. Of course. Finding her doing anything else would be tantamount to anarchy.

"Applejack!" Twilight shouted. "Do you have a minute?"

Applejack bucked a tree, shaking the apples on it free and dumping them into the baskets set beside its trunk. "Sure!" Applejack trotted towards them. "Wut can Ah do ya fer?"

"I'm...upset about something." Twilight said vaguely.

"Ya mean tha' date?"

Twilight's eyes widened. How did Applejack-

"Rarity got us all together and told us everythin'." Applejack explained at Twilight's glare. "Now, Ah know it's supposed to be yer week, Twilight. But think of it this way; yer sufferin' a little bit to help Rarity a lot!"

Twilight's eye twitched. A little? A LITTLE!?

Applejack, do you have any IDEA- no, no. Of course you don't. I'd be worried if you did.

But Twilight shook her head. "Thanks, Applejack. I'll see you around...come on, Pinkie." Twilight turned to leave. Pinkie stopped to wave Applejack goodbye before following. Twilight didn't really feel any better from Applejack's words, but at least she had gotten the idea to see her other friends before night fell.
The two advanced onto Fluttershy's cottage, Pinkie not really knowing -or being too concerned- with why they were going to Fluttershy's again already.

Twilight tentatively knocked on the door. Angel opened it, closed it, and then Fluttershy opened again at a crack's width just large enough to see them. "Oh, hello, Twilight. Do you want to go to my oasis again already?"

"No, no." Twilight shook her head.

"Oh...is this about the date?"

Twilight nodded. "I was...hoping you might have something to say, Fluttershy."

"Oh, um..." Fluttershy's eye shifted away. "Well... try to enjoy yourself. I hear the businesspony is paying, and you'll go to one of Ponyville's, um, 'fancy' places, so there's that. That's nice...isn't it?"

Twilight supposed. But what amount of fancy, overpriced food was worth the risk of losing a lo... whatever this was?

"I guess there's that." Twilight turned around, motioning for Pinkie to follow. The two trotted back into the grassy clearing where Rainbow Dash liked hanging out. She wasn't there at first, so they sat down and waited.

Pinkie looked got distracted by the shine of dew on a blade of grass.

Finally, after half an hour, Rainbow Dash flew into view, clearly upset about something. She was muttering curses and other ill words about her boss under her breath. Perhaps now wasn't the best time to ask for emotional advice...

"Rainbow Dash?" Twilight said.

"Hmm?" Dash poked her head out from the cloud. "Oh, hey guys. You want to see another trick of mine?"

"As fun as that sounds, Rainbow Dash, I wanted to ask you something." Twilight answered. "About the date?"

Dash scratched her head. "What date?"

Twilight was a little annoyed. Just like Rainbow not to remember being told about the date and its unusual situation. She probably blew it off as "Mushy stuff." and didn't consider it important.

"Never mind." Twilight said before leading Pinkie away.

As the two of them walked, Pinkie was starting to take the hint that Twilight wasn't aware she was giving.

"You don't want to go and chaperone this date, do you, Twilight?" Pinkie asked. A surprisingly sensitive and to-the-point question for her. Twilight was caught a little off-guard, and she had her answer prepped and ready.

No, no, I don't want YOU to go on this date, Pinkie Pie. Twilight clarified in her mind.

"It's not that, Pinkie Pie, it's..." Twilight rolled her eyes. "I don't want to talk about it."

"You keep saying that." Pinkie informed her.

"Well, I DON'T!" Twilight snapped. She put her hoof on her mouth after she realizing she had raised her voice. "I'm sorry, Pinkie, I'm just so stressed out right now..."

"About? OH! You know what? The Cakes have this weird drink they always make me drink when I start experimenting with my fireworks. It tastes funny. I think they call it, like, extra-strength camomile tea, or something."

"Pinkie, I'd rather go back to the library and read a book."

"Okaaay..."

They returned to the library, where Spike greeted Twilight with a letter from the Princess.

To My Most Faithful Student,

I have reviewed the contents of some of your letters recently, and have come to the conclusion that you are having severe emotional distress. I have sent this letter to Spike, enclosed with some crossword puzzles. They should help get your mind off things.

"Oooh!" Twilight squealed with excitement, her previous troubles already forgotten at the mere thought. "Where did you put the puzzles, Spike?"

Spike held them up. "Right here." Twilight took them with her magic and dashed towards the table with a pen ready.

"Let's see..." Twilight scanned over the first puzzle and instantly set to work on it.

Across, three letter word for rodent... Rat.

Down, twelve letter word for insect...grasshopper. Duh.

Across, six letter word for kitchen activity...baking.

Across, eight letter word for deity...Celestia.

Down, nine letter word for robot...automaton.

Across, six letter word for baked good...Pinkie Pie. No, wait! AAAAAAGH!

And she was doing so well at having put that out of her mind.

Twilight looked at the window. It was getting dark. How'd it get dark already? She hadn't done that many parts of the puzzle, had she!?

Looking through them, Twilight could she had done that many. She just hadn't took particular note of all the problems. She did feel a surge of pride that she was just that good, though.

"Twilight!" Pinkie exclaimed. "We need to get dressed for the date!"

Twilight turned around to see Spike handing Pinkie's dress on a hanger, with Twilight's own in his other claw. Pinkie pulled her dress against her chest and looked at Twilight, pleading for her to hurry up. Twilight magicked the dress away from Spike and told him to leave them alone. Of course, he pointed out that they didn't normally wear clothes. So why should he have to leave? Twilight said it didn't have anything to do with that. (Which was completely true, actually.)

Somehow, Pinkie had wormed her way back into her lust-inducing...err, her simultaneously both classy and skimpy...n-no, her-um, her...oh, forget it. Her dress.

Twilight walked over to the other side of her desk for cover and pulled her gray, star-cut dress. As much she wanted to be near Pinkie, putting clothes on right in front of her without anything to obscure herself was still outside of her comfort zone.

The two of them dashed out the door and sprinted at first, but after some distance, they were close enough to the restaurant that they could walk and get there on time.

Well, this is a fine mess we're in.

Indeed!

Why don't you solve all your problems right now and just kiss her?

Twilight furrowed her brow. The voices in her head were back.

Oh! That's funny. You seemed upset when we left yesterday at the Corner.

That's true...still, couldn't you at least say something USEFUL?

Oh! Did you hear that, girls? She wants us to say something useful!

Ha!

Haaahaaa!

Hohoho!

Twilight eventually succumbed to the chorus of laughter inside her head. Haaahaha! Expecting the voices inside her head to offer something useful. Haha!

"Haahahaha!"

"Uh, Twilight?"

Twilight snapped her trap shut at the sound of Pinkie's voice. "Um, yes, Pinkie Pie?"

"What are you laughing at?"

"Oh...um..." Twilight mumbled, trying to stall while she thought of an explanation. "I, uh, just remembered a joke I was told!"

"Ooh! Was it funny? I love funny jokes!"

"Um, it's a librarian joke. You wouldn't get it."

"Oh. Okay. The only thing worse than a joke that isn't funny is a joke that you have to explain!" Pinkie merrily said, not taking any issue with Twilight's haphazard explanation.

They were at the restaurant door now...

Well, Twilight thought. This isn't going to be pleasant for me.

"Come on. Let's go inside." Twilight dictated to Pinkie. They entered and found the businesspony waiting at a seat by the desk clerk.

"Ah. Thank you for showing up on time. I...have not always had my dates show when they were supposed to." The askew direction of his eyes suggested that his previous dates had actually stood him up. This garnered him a little sympathy form Twilight. But then she remembered why she was here.

"Please forgive me if I sound rude, but why are you here?" The businesspony asked Twilight.

"I'm here to chaperone." Twilight answered like she had been practicing the line for a play for months on end.

The buisnesspony looked understandably confused. "I was not aware I needed chaperoning."

Twilight put on a rather large smile. "Who said you were the one who needed chaperoning?"

The businesspony's eyes went bug-sized, and he looked at Pinkie like seeing her in a new, more violent and dangerous light.

"What?" Twilight asked at his expression. "Oh...don't worry, she won't hurt you."

The businesspony expression went to one of less concern, but an observant pony could see sighs of nervousness still present.

"So, shall we eat?" The businesspony asked after clearing his throat. They approached the clerk, who checked if they had a reservation. Once the businesspony had established that he did, the clerk led them to a table.

A waiter came up and dropped menus on the table for them. "Do you know what you would like to drink?"

Twilight ordered some sparkling water. The businesspony asked for a dark soda. Pinkie had to skim over to the last page of the menu before asking for a fruit punch. The waited jotted down their orders and told them to think about what they wanted to eat while she got the drinks.

"So, Miss Pie, tell me about yourself." The businesspony said.

"Well, I like making ponies smile, and baking- OH! And siiinging! Don't forget the singing." Pinkie answered. "Anything about myself I missed, Twilight?"

Twilight was confused to as why Pinkie would ask for a second opinion of herself. But she answered while giving the businesspony uncomfortable glances. "You're, uh, very spontaneous."

"There ya go! I'm spontaneous!" Pinkie declared proudly. "Whatever that means!"

The businesspony raised an eyebrow. "Quite. Myself, I..."

He proceeded to go on about his success story. Twilight rested her knee on the table and supported her head with her hoof, not really caring. She zoned out, with only the voices in her head audible.

You know, you really shouldn't hate this businesspony so badly. He's just like you, really: he has a crush on Pinkie that he just can't help. Not his fault you didn't have the confidence to say something before he did-

I do NOT have a crush on Pinkie!

You're right; It's really more of an unhealthy obsession.

"SHUT UP!" Twilight slammed her hoof on the table, causing the silverware to clatter, Pinkie and the businesspony to look at her oddly, and the waiter to hesitate in bringing their drinks.

Twilight used her magic trick to blush to enhance the natural blush she was forming. "Oh, I'm sorry. There was... a fly in my ear."

Before Pinkie or the businesspony could say anything, the waiter rushed over, sympathetic. "Oh, I hear you, girlfriend! A fly in the ear is the WORST! Anyways, here are your drinks." The waiter laid their drinks on the table and pulled her notebook. "Now, what will you have to eat?"

"Some grass Parmesan would be lovely." The businesspony said.

"Grass Parmesan for the gentlecolt." The waiter said. He turned to Pinkie. "You?"

"Uh...this tofu flamagnon sounds good!"

Twilight rushed to keep a mistake from being made. "Oh, you wouldn't like that, Pinkie. Here. Let me recommend something for you." Twilight took the menu (even though she had her own) and dragged her hoof across. "You'd probably like the parfait le trois." Twilight handed the menu back over.

"Okay!" Pinkie said. "You're a Canterlot pony, so I bet you have some experience with this stuff!" Pinkie offered her menu to the waiter. "I'll have what she said."

"Excellent." The waiter turned to Twilight. "You, miss?"

"...Some Alfredo noodles, please."

"Alfredo. Thy will be done!" The waiter said jokingly. "I'll take the rest of your menus, if you don't mind."

The waiter left them, leaving them to chat.

"So, you're from Canterlot as well?" The businesspony asked Twilight.

"Yeah...I live in Ponyville now."

"I see." The businesspony nodded his head. "Pardon, but did you do anything while there?"

"Oh..." Twilight turned her head away. "I did, but I wouldn't want you to feel overwhelmed."

"Oh, no, no." He insisted. "Tell me. I can take it."

Twilight doubted that. He wouldn't suddenly start fretting about himself if he found she was the Princess' student? Unlikely. Twilight knew first hoof- and completely understood, often being on the receiving end- why a pony would be intimated by somepony as high-ranking as "The Princess' Most Faithful Student' and she really didn't want to ruin this night for him. Even if she wanted to burn the place to the ground just because he had asked for the date. Actively sabotaging so she could have Pinkie to herself would be a hollow victory.

"I had a scholarship." Twilight told him.

"Oh?"

"Mh-hm. I had to move to Ponyville to continue my studies."

"Oh my. That's saddening."

"Not really. I didn't like having to come here, but after what I experienced...I asked for it." Twilight looked up, remembering her first, most wonderful experience with her friends.

"My mistake." The businesspony said. "Ah. I do believe that is the waiter with our food."

The waiter had indeed returned, carrying a tray of their dishes they ordered. She set them out, saying the names of the dishes aloud and making sure she had gotten who ordered what right.

"I'll leave you to it."

The three of them started eating. Twilight, of course, had the manners to use the correct silverware (dumb restaurants with their fancy multiple silverware. Salad fork, soup spoon...what more did a pony need beyond the basic fork-knife-spoon set-up?)

Pinkie, however, just started pigging out, burying her muzzle into the dish and eating like...well, a big pink pig!

Twilight caught the businesspony staring. "Something wrong, sir?"

"No..." The businesspony answered. "I just wasn't expecting your friend here to have such an appetite, is all. You must be quite hungry."

Pinkie paused, lowering the dish from her muzzle. "No. Just regular hungry. Why ya asking?"

He wasn't asking, Pinkie...

"No reason." The business pony assured her, returning to his own dish.

The proceeding meal was quiet. Nopony said anything. The bussinesspony didn't try to brag or flaunt himself. Or flirt. Though Pinkie's messy eating was starting to attract unwarranted attention from other ponies at the restaurant.

Once they had finished...mmh...Twilight rubbed her belly in satisfaction. The Alfredo here was fantastic, and filling. Anyways, once they were done, the bussinesspony pulled out his checkbook.

"Now, do either of you lovely ladies desire a desert?"

Pinkie stared blankly. "If we wanted a desert, why wouldn't we just go to Sugarcube Corner?"

Now it was the bussinesspony's turned to stare. "I'm sorry?"

"If you want a treat, you go to Sugarcube Corner! Everypony in Ponyville knows that!"

"Pinkie." Twilight said, stepping in by poking her friend in the wither. "He's not in Ponyville, he's just visiting." She turned back to him. "Remember Sugarcube Corner? You tried to buy it? Well, all the ponies are just so friendly it's treated as a serious offense to go to anywhere but there for a desert snack."

"I see..." The businesspony said. He scribbled in his checkbook, and tore the resulting check out and left it on the table. "Well, I presume that means that IF you want a desert, you'll retire to the S-C-C. Would you like me to join you there?"

"No thank you." Twilight said. "No offense, but we don't know you that well, yet."

"Ah! None taken. Understandable." He hopped out of his seat. "Well, provided you have nothing else you need, I'll make my leave now. Perhaps we should do this again sometime."

He took another glimpse of Pinkie's sparkling-clean plate, and her scattered, abandoned, neglected silverware.

"Then again, perhaps not." The bussinesspony muttered quietly, but not so quiet that Twilight couldn't hear. She felt a pressure lift off her heart. "By the way, you two simply must tell where you got those dresses!"

"Rarity's Boutique!" They both answered instantly and quickly, having nearly forgotten that was why they were there in the first place.

"All right. Well, let's go to Sugarcube Corner!" Pinkie declared, hopping out of her seat.

"What?" Twilight question, not expecting that. "Why? Do you want a desert, Pinkie?"

"No. Well, yes! But we have another, more important reason to be there!"

Twilight nervously stepped out of her seat. "What's that?"

Pinkie turned to face Twilight an expression that wasn't quite serious Pinkie, but it was on that edge. That precipice.

"It's the last day of your Week, silly."

Twilight's eyebrows shot up her face. She quickly dashed away from her chair, accidentally knocking it over, and rushed to Pinkie's side.

"Well..." Twilight dared to take Pinkie's hoof in hers. "Shall we?"

"We shall!" Pinkie answered enthusiastically, raising her snout in the air, having no problems with Twilight's action.


As they walked out of the restaurant, under the bright, beautiful moonlight, Pinkie got a pensive expression.

"Twilight, can I tell you something?"

"Sure." Twilight replied quietly. Was it going to be what she wanted to hear...?

"I didn't enjoy that date thingy. It wasn't fun."

Oh, YES! YES! Not quite the "I've been infatuated with you" Twilight was hoping for, but it was a close second! An extremely close, encouraging, hope-increasing second! YES!

As they walked from the fancy restaurant towards the Sugarcube Corner, Twilight felt a soft breeze. Under the wind's gusty influence, the flowers and grass swayed hypnotically. Before she even realized it, Twilight was rocking her head to their sweet, floral rhythm, her neck craned, and her tail wrapping around Pinkie's.

"Twilight, what's that for?" Pinkie asked, looking at her tail. She then looked at Twilight and said with all the warmth of a doting mother. "Are you cold? Is the wind getting to you?"

Twilight saw the opportunity for her, and took it with outstretched metal claws. "Yes, Pinkie...the wind is getting to me."

"Aww...here! You cuddle next to me to stay warm!"

Twilight's inner child giggled at her plan having worked. Well, her inner everything, really. She rubbed the side of her neck against Pinkie's and put her head to Pinkie's cheek. "Thanks, Pinkie."

"No problem! Anything for a friend!"

Anything? Are you surrre about that, Pinkie Pie?

They reached Sugarcube Corner, after much walking and having to endure the hypnotizing flowers.

"Oh, hey Pinkie Pie!" Mr. Cake greeted them once they were inside the door while wiping the counter. "We were just about to close up for the night, but we'll more than happy to make something for our extra-special helper!"

"Thanks, Mr. Cake! But you can go on ahead. Me and Twilight are going to stay up late while we wait for her Week to run out."

"The correct phrase is 'Twilight and I.'" Twilight corrected automatically.

"Her...Week?" Mr. Cake questioned. He tossed his hooves up. "Never mind. I don't want to know!" He gave the counter one last precautionary wipe, then dashed for his room.

"Well...It's just us now." Pinkie said.

"Mh-hmm." Twilight said, not comfortable with the idea of being alone with Pinkie. Well, she was elated to be alone with Pinkie. It was what she might've done that her friends would disapprove that made her uncomfortable. A moment ago, she had been comfortable being openly affectionate because of the flowers' influence, but now that she was outside of their reach...

"Well, we're going to just be up til midnight." Pinkie explained. "You want to play a game of Twister to pass the time?"

Twilight's eyes shrunk. She wasn't very flexible, and the Pinkie was able to do all sorts of outlandish cartoonish things...agreeing to a Twister game with her was like...like... a weatherpony leaving a tornado unattended. It just screamed for something terrible to happen.

"No thanks."

"All right, but we're gonna be boooored!" Pinkie warned her.

"I won't be bored, Pinkie." Twilight said. "I have you here."

D'OH! That was just a little more unsubtle than Twilight was okay with...

"Really?" Pinkie raised an eyebrow. "I am that entertaining?"

Twilight turned away, not wanting to risk another slip-up.

"...At times." Twilight told her.

"Huh."

Silence passed over them both.

"Pinkie Pie? I was told the purpose of the Week was so you could get close to me and find out what kind of pony I am." Twilight turned back around. "What...what did you learn?"

"Oh!" Pinkie exclaimed. She looked upwards and starting counting on her hooves, even though they didn't have digits to count on. "You like books. A lot. You're very neat and tidy...sometimes too neat and tidy. You don't like roller coasters. You REALLY don't like when ponies call you crazy, and, um... I think that's it!"

Twilight gave a look, then turned away to look at the Corner's clock. It was ticking slowly, just ever so slowly edging closer and closer to midnight, where her week would be up... as would her unmitigated, unrivaled, unquestioned time together with Pinkie.

Twilight wished she would say something else. Any conversation to make time go faster as the clock tick-tocked away.

Tick...tock...click.

Click. Click. Click.

Clank. Click. Click.

Clank. Tick. Tock.

Almost on the midnight numeral now...

Ding-ding-brrriiing!

The clock had struck midnight. A wooden birdie began popping out of a panel just above the face of the clock. Probably Pinkie Pie's idea.

"Well, that's it." Pinkie said, turning to Twilight. The two started at each other, the shower of moonlight flooding through the window putting an undeniable romantic gesture in the air. Pinkie got off her seat and approached Twilight. "I guess this is goodbye...you know, as far as your Week goes."

"Mh-hmm."

"Um, before you leave... uh, the last pony who had a week-"

Cheerilee. Twilight thought to herself.

"Really liked it when it was over. She just exploded with joy I wasn't going to be 'following her around' anymore and... it really makes me happy you didn't do that. So..."

Aw...Twilight knew how sad Pinkie got when a pony didn't like the weird things she did...wait, why was Cheerilee so enthusiastic about helping Twilight with her's? Oh, forget- iiittt..

Pinkie gave Twilight a chaste little kiss on the cheek.

"Bye!" Pinkie waved and walked towards the counter like it was nothing.

Twilight's eyes rolled in their sockets, knocked into a daze.

"...B-bye." Twilight stammered, rubbing the spot where Pinkie kissed. Twilight rubbed her cheek again and turned towards the door. Her steps towards the exit were slow, deliberate and stilted.

It was a chaste, platonic kiss. The kind Rarity gave Fluttershy when they went to the spa. It was quick and unattached.

She tried to push it aside. To push away the little, insignificant kiss aside. But she couldn't. She just...couldn't.

Her eye twitched as she tried to fight off the longings she had kept buried, but that kiss... all those times she had stayed herself when Pinkie was close to her...it was nothing like actually being given a kiss. They had slept in the same bed, and it hadn't evoked the feeling Twilight was getting now. She couldn't keep it inside herself. Compared to the feeling of Pinkie's body sleeping next to hers, that kiss was like the difference between a lid on a trash can be budged versus the lid on a trash can being blown off by a leaf blower.

Everything...

... Just

Went.


SNAP.





I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!

Haaa...hahahaa...haahaaa!

You hear that sound? That 'CRINK-CRINK-CRINK' sound? You're probably wondering why that's relevant, aren't you? That's the sound ceramic makes when it breaks! Ceramic like masks. Like the mask Twilight had been wearing. The mask Twilight was wearing that broke just now.

Every single control mechanism she thought of just went flying right out the window. Imagine a very large old machine with dozens of gears and chains and pulleys to make it work. Let's pretend Twilight's controls were that machine.

That little kiss was a like a wrench being tossed into the machine. Each and all of the chains snap, the pulleys crumble, and the gears to grind no more.

"MMmmhhh...!" Twilight grunted. Her hoof was on the doorknob and shaking heavily.

"Uh, Twilight?" Pinkie questioned. "Are you okay?"

Twilight whinnied and twirled around. With lion-like power and speed, she dashed all the way back across the room and pinned Pinkie to the counter beneath her hooves.

"No, Pinkie." Twilight said, heavy breaths weaving in and out of every syllable. "I'm not okay. I've been sooo hungry these last few days."

"Oh. Well, the Cakes have a bunch of treats that I'm sure will care of that!"

Twilight shook her head and realized she needed to clarify. "No, Pinkie. I'm hungry for you."

Pinkie gasped dramatically. "Are you an Evil Enchantress!?"

"Yes- no, wait, what?"

"You said you were hungry for me! It must be because you're a pony-eating Evil Enchantress like we thought Zecora but she really it wasn't! It was you all along!"

Twilight giggled and smiled. "No, Pinkie. That's not what I meant." Twilight leaned down her neck closer to Pinkie's snout. "Let me show you. Please?"

Pinkie seemed uncertain, and she could tell something was up. She was uncomfortable. "Uhh..."

"You remember that game I made up at the picnic before the beginning of the week?" Twilight asked, stroking her hoof across Pinkie's cheeks. "I figured out how the rest of the game goes. Heeeaaaaeeee... I know how it goes, Pinkie."

"Ummm...okay, I guess."

Twilight giggled and raved under her breath a little. Pinkie probably had no idea what she just agreed to. As far as Twilight was concerned, she had just been given full consent to do whatever she wanted.

And this time, she was going to do it. Not like at the doctor's or those times on her own bed. She was going to take it like a foal taking cookie from the cookie jar!

Twilight swooped quickly down on Pinkie to start on her 'consumption'. Stroking Pinkie's mane with her hooves and lips pressed together, Twilight wriggled and writhed her tongue 'til it was in Pinkie's throat. It was a very good thing for Pinkie ponies' tongues were only so large; Twilight, in her current state, would've had no objection to shoving her tongue down her esophagus, if given the opportunity.

Pinkie's mouth tasted so delicious. It had little tidbits of leftover candies Pinkie consumed flavoring it with the most indescribable flavor. Often, Twilight would day-dream about how Pinkie's mouth would taste, imagining any number of mints, caramel chocolates, or candy canes.

The real thing was so much better then anything she could have dreamed.

She rubbed their curved, soft little pony breasts together. Well, Pinkie's was soft. So, so, so very soft. Twilight didn't know how her own chest felt. She didn't need to, at the moment, she just needed to feel Pinkie's on hers.

Although...she would be upset were she to later find out that her own chest felt scraggly, matted or anything else that wasn't a pleasant feeling. She wouldn't have liked to have rubbed her scraggly, unkempt, unpleasant chest onto Pinkie's, if there were the case.

Remembering how much she enjoyed pulling Pinkie's tail with her magic, and Pinkie being on her tail at the doctor's, Twilight curled her tail around the base of Pinkie's and started tugging and jerking.

And just to make sure Pinkie was getting full sensory stimulation, Twilight lifted her back hoof and scratched Pinkie's Cutie Mark. Cutie Marks were not, by themselves, something naughty, but they could be stimulated easily under the correct circumstances.

"Mmmmmmm...mmmmh...mmmh!" Twilight moaned. Weeks and hours spent worrying about her friends' reactions in anxiety and paranoia, all tossed away by being drained into Pinkie's mouth via kiss.

Oh, What would her friends think if they saw the two of them right now?

Better question: Who cares!? This was what Twilight had wanted. She'll worry about it later. Right now, though, this was what she wanted. This is what she dreamed of. Her dream. What she NEEDED.

Oh, sweet release, how I've longed for you!

All the mental barriers she had, broke. All the mental chains she had, snapped. All the mental picket fences she had, set aflame. Gloriously aflame with her lust.

"Mmmm...mmm...mm..MMMMMMmhh...haeee...MMMH!" Twilight started to slow down and back off to catch a breath, but she either recovered quickly or didn't get a full breath, as she went right back to work on Pinkie in a matter of seconds.

Twilight lifted up her back legs and criss-crossed them around Pinkie, tightening around her in a vice-grip as she increased the intensity of her expressed affections. As she was almost ready to quit, the normally neat and tidy Twilight was as sloppy as any of Appejack's pigs, her saliva getting all over Pinkie's cheeks.

It took Twilight a long, tense moment to relax her muscles and finally draw away from Pinkie. She panted quite a bit. Not from physical exhaustion, but from having had so many mental self-restraints removed in such quick succession. "Hhhhaa..."

Twilight stretched her neck, stood up tall, and looked down at Pinkie. "Pinkie, I...over the last couple of weeks, I've been having this indescribable feeling around you, but now, after tonight, after what I just did...I've realized...I'm ready to admit...to you and to myself..."

Twilight lowered her face back into Pinkie's.

"I love you."

Twilight wobbled a little, her eyes rolling.

"Oooh...I feel dizzy..."




Ooohhhhgg...ummm...huh?


Twilight's eyes froze as she came crashing back into reality.

What did I just do? What have I DONE!?

Twilight took a long, long moment to take in Pinkie's expression. It was one of uncertainty and confusion. Perhaps with a hint of embarrassment.

"Oh, Pinkie Pie..." Twilight breathed out her love's name in a shallow, empty, defeated tone. "I'm so sorry, I just...lost control." Twilight rubbed Pinkie's cheek for a moment, but then drew it back after she realized touching was the last thing Pinkie needed right now. "I...I understand if you hate me now, but...please forgive me."

Twilight got off Pinkie and the counter, headed for the door. She didn't notice Pinkie raise up off the counter like a resurrected zombie behind her.

"Um...you know..." Pinkie said.

Twilight looked over her shoulder at her. Pinkie could all too easily see the forming tears, the forming orbs of water, in Twilight's eyes.

"About two days before your week started, Owloyicous came over and told me that you liked me. Was that what he meant?"

Pinkie was rather taken aback by the instant, switch-like change in Twilight's eyes. They went from broken and sad to...something.

"He did, did he?" Twilight questioned. "Well...once I get home, I supposed he and I will have to talk."

Twilight left the Corner at last.

Pinkie rested against the counter, wondering what she did wrong.

What did I do to make Twilight cry like that? I just spent the whole week getting to know her, and I have no idea what caused that! Sure, I don't really know what she did to me just now...with the tongue...and the tail and...but still! She looked like her whole world had just crumbled around her! Hey, 'crumble' rhymes with 'rumble' which sounds like 'rubble' which...err...oh! Someone's coming into the shop! This late at night?

It was Fluttershy. She looked tired.

"Fluttershy?" Pinkie asked. "What are you doing here?"

"Oh, um, well..." Fluttershy fell asleep where she stood. Pinkie clapped her hooves together to wake her back up. "OH! Um, did I fall asleep? I'm sorry...anyway, Angel won't lie down to bed, and I was hoping you might have something that I could give to tire him out."

"Okie-dokie-lokie! Let me just reach over the counter here and-"

The door chime rang again. In came a very panicked looking Spike.

"Spike?" Fluttershy said. "I know why I'm here so late, why are you here?"

Spike huffed. "Twilight's...gone...crazy." Spike held up the bundle in his arms- a very burnt and crispy Owloyicous. "She called Owloyicous a tattle-tale and starting blasting everything with her magic! I've been looking everywhere for you!"

"Oh my!" Fluttershy took the poor animal from Spike's embrace and wrapped it in her own. "Do we know what's making Twilight so upset?"

"I was a little more concerned about making sure I didn't get fried too..." Spike answered, rubbing the back of his neck.

"Well, we should go to talk to Twilight."

"Oh, I don't think that's a good idea, Fluttershy. I really don't think Twilight wants to talk to anyone right now."

"Nonsense." Fluttershy said reassuringly. "Whenever I'm upset, nothing helps me better than having a shoulder to cry on."

A thundering BOOOOM echoed through all, or at least most of, Ponyville that made Pinkie Pie, Fluttershy and Spike and everything on a flat surface- the tissue dispensers on the tables, the chairs, the register on the counter- all bounce five feet into the air.

"I don't think Twilight wants to be talked to right now." Fluttershy concluded.

Pinkie looked down and sniffed a little. "Hey, Fluttershy? We keep the treats on the other side of the counter. Help yourself. I need to go to bed."

"Ooh, are you sure? I wouldn't want-"

But Pinkie cut her off by walking up the stairs, intent on going to her room. Once safely inside her room, so pink she could've have camouflaged into it, she buried herself under her covers.

What's wrong with Twilight? What did I do? Does have something to do with...

Pinkie rubbed her cheek. She had forgotten to wash off the saliva on it before tucking in.

Whatever that was. What do you CALL that, anyways?

Pinkie rolled about in her bed, looking at the drool on her hoof. With only the loud rumbling booms of a distraught unicorn to lull her to sleep, she was left awake...

Constantly wondering what she did wrong to make Twilight so sad and teary-eyed.
> Volatile Chemical Reaction, Part 2: Smile For Me
> --------------------------------------------------------------------------

Twilight Sparkle was completely insane.

Don't try to argue with it, okay? After being trapped in the library's closet, guarded by that owl with those beady, all-seeing eyes, Pinkie was quite convinced Twilight was completely insane.

She had been trapped in here for days. Twilight would always bring her breakfast, lunch, and dinner with whatever choice of drink Pinkie requested. At breakfast and lunch, Twilight would leave her alone, but at dinner, she would eat with her.

"Mm." Pinkie traced her hoof along the wall, trying to find a seam or splinter that she could punch out and maybe make an escape.

Owloyicous started hooting wildly and loudly. The closet door swung open, pushed by Twilight's hoof.

"Oh...trying to escape again, sweetie?" Twilight said bemusedly. "Now, now...you know we can't have that."

"Twilight!" Pinkie pleaded. "Please let me go! This isn't right, keeping me here like this!"

Twilight looked confused, then blew it off with a chuckle. "Oh... Am I going to have to use my horn on you again?"

Pinkie backed against the wall, remembering what happened the last time Twilight used her horn. "No! No. It's fine. I'll stay put."

"I don't think you will." Twilight said coldly, approaching. Pinkie had nowhere to run, stuck in this blasted closet. Twilight put her hooves on Pinkie's shoulders and pressed against them, pinning her.

"Please don't." Pinkie whimpered weakly.

Twilight's horn lit up, sending out two small beams of pinkish light from it. They swirled around and around like the lights on a police siren. Pinkie had no choice but to look at it. Even she tried looking at the wall, the light was still visible and drew her attention. She could feel herself being pulled in, deeper and deeper, her eyes becoming glazed.

"Now...say it." Twilight instructed confidently.

"I...love...yooou." Pinkie drawled, enchanted and spellbound. She hugged Twilight back and leaned for a kiss with closed eyes. Twilight moaned quietly before they were done.

"Good." Twilight patted Pinkie on the neck. "Now you'll stay, won't you?"

"Yes..." Pinkie said, still entranced.




Pinkie bolted out of her covers, her mouth a squiggly line of fret and worry.

Twilight wouldn't do that...would she?

Pinkie curled her hooves around the edges of her blanket. She put the blanket over her snout and whimpered a little.

"Pinkie Pie?" Mrs. Cake called from below, on the lower floor of Sugarcube Corner. "Are you all right up there, dear?"

Pinkie wasn't going to lie.

"No!"

"No!?"

Mrs. and Mr. Cake were in Pinkie's room in almost the time it took Pinkie to appear mysteriously like she always did.

"What's wrong, dear?" Mr. Cake asked, sitting on the bed and draping a fatherly leg around Pinkie's neck.

"I had a bad dream." Pinkie answered, but she wasn't really willing to discuss anymore than that.

"Oh, dear. Do you want to talk about it? Maybe have a chocolate bar?"

"Chocolate would be good..." Pinkie muttered, looking down. Being a baker, she knew chocolate always made ponies cheer up. (Though she had rather painfully discovered how some ponies needed a LOT more cheering up than just a bar of chocolate would allow.)

Mrs. Cake left the room and returned with a very large chocolate bar the size of a ruler. Anypony else would gorge on it and get sick, but Pinkie had a bottomless pit for a stomach. The chocolate probably wouldn't even be a crumb's worth to her. She took it and began to nibble it on slowly.

"Oh...must've been one heck of a dream." Mr. Cake noted at Pinkie's abnormal slow eating.

"Ooooh!" Mrs. Cake made a very displeased high-pitched squeal. "Isn't there anything else we can do?"

Pinkie bit on her chocolate and shook her head no.

"Drat." Mrs. Cake looked away, upset she couldn't do anything for her number one baker.

"Tell ya what, kiddo." Mr. Cake said. "Why don't you take the day off? You're our best baker- besides ourselves, of course- but you're no good to anypony if you're head isn't on straight."

"Okay..." Pinkie muttered, still nibbling on her chocolate. Mrs. Cake was almost ready to declare a world record: "Longest Time its Taken Pinkie to Eat a Sweet".

"Have a nice day, Mr. and Mrs. Cake." Pinkie half-heartedly waved at them as she jumped out of bed, leaving the chocolate bar's wrapping abandoned on her sheets. "I need to go talk to a friend."

"Do whatever you think will make you feel better." Mr. Cake told her as she took her first step down the stairs.

After going from one end to the other, Pinkie found herself stopping at the Corner's bottom floor. She looked at the counter, where last night's incident had taken place. Thinking in some makes-sense-to-Pinkie-Pie way, she went up to the counter and traced her hoof across its surface. In hope that would somehow shed light on just what it WAS that Twilight did last night.

Pinkie could only for a moment recall what Twilight's tongue had tasted like on hers. Ink. Probably from all those library books she was always reading. Fancy, high-priced good quality ink, too.

Taking a forlorn last glance at the counter, Pinkie started trying to prepare herself.

Come on, Pinkie. You can do this. You're a big girl now.

With that reminder firmly in her mind, Pinkie took in a deep breath and puffed her chest out high, intent on showing she wasn't afraid of anything the wide-wide world of Equestria had to throw at her!

Only for the breath she was holding to flow out of her nose like a deflating balloon...

Shaking that aside, Pinkie bravely trotted out Sugarcube Corner and up to...*gulp* Twilight's library.

Pinkie didn't want to do this. But she gave the door an impatient knock anyways.

The door creaked open to reveal a very...normal looking Twilight.

"Oh! Hey, Pinkie Pie. Come to pick up a book?" Twilight asked jovially. Cheerfully. Joyfully.

Like absolutely nothing had happened.

"Um, actually, Twilight, I wanted to talk to you." Pinkie said hesitantly.

"Oh?" It was really unnerving how cheerful Twilight was being. "About?"

Pinkie creased her eyebrows. "About last night?...On the counter? Where you kissed me?"

Twilight's demeanor switched like...like...like a switched being thrown. Her irises shrunk, her eyes twitching. The base of her tail arched up. Pinkie got the feeling Twilight was going to sprout fangs, bite into her neck, and then propped her up in a display case in some twisted way of 'uniting' them like in a horror movie.

But instead, Twilight just slapped on a very, very forced smiled and chuckled airily. "Hahahah! I have...NO idea...absolutely no idea...at all...what you're talking about, Pinkie Pie! Ha ha ha. Ha..."

Pinkie frowned. The change in her expression seemed to provoke another mood swing from Twilight.

"Oh...don't do that, Pinkie Pie." Twilight said sympathetically. "You look terrible when you frown. It's not right when you frown..."

Pinkie switched to a pout.

"Don't do that either. That's even-" Twilight's voice started to crack. "-Wyyooorrsee...st-stop that. I said stop- AAAA I CAN'T HANDLE SEEING THAT ON YOUR FACE!"

Twilight shut the door. She didn't even slam it; she just shut it quietly.

Pinkie was even more confused now than she had been before. She knocked on the door repeatedly, hoping to coax Twilight back out so she could try to get to the bottom of the mystery. "Twilight! Twilight! Twilight, come back out!"

Twilight did, eventually...wearing an open book over her head, with Spike similar wearing a book on his, and that durn owl in Twilight's hoof, appearing to know just as much as Pinkie did about what was going on. Twilight sat down on her fours and pointed Owloyicous like a gun. "Sargent Spike! The enemy has detected our position! Open fire! Pew! Pew! Pew!" She shook the poor owl in her hoof, making laser noises, pretending he was some sort of weapon. "Pew! Pew!"

Pinkie turned to Spike. Spike shrugged.

Twilight quit shaking Owloyicous and gave Pinkie a filthy look. "I'm going to keep doing this until you leave." Her tone strongly suggested she was aware of how delusional she was acting. "Or if this doesn't work, I'll go back inside and think of something else to pretend to be."

"Okay...um." Pinkie turned to leave. "See you later?"

"Yes!" Twilight answered excitedly, wrapping her hooves around poor, poor Owloyicous like a plushie animal. She turned her head away and spoke in a cold detached tone. "I mean, maybe...if you want to. I guess."

Pinkie made an 'o' of confusion with her mouth and then started to walk away from the door. She heard it close behind her, followed by Twilight making a very frustrated groan, and Spike questioning what was wrong.

"Hmm..." Pinkie dejectedly walked away, her head hung so low it almost touched the grass. She was blindsided by a roving blue blur that knocked her to her side.

"Ah-heh...my bad, Pinks." Rainbow Dash apologized, lying parallel on top of Pinkie's side. "Here..." Dash got up and gave Pinkie a helping hoof up. Even as inattentive and insensitive as she was, even Rainbow Dash could pick up on Pinkie's dull mood. A pony would have to be completely blind to not notice Pinkie not being a hyperactive ball of energy. "Heeey! What's wrong?"

Pinkie looked away, trying to come up with an explanation. She didn't want Twilight to get in trouble for her own lack of knowledge. "Uh...somepony kissed me."

Dash raised an eyebrow. "Why would they do that? Not that you're not pretty or anything, but..."

"You think I'm pretty, Rainbow Dash?"

"Eehh...not really. I just didn't want you to feel like I was insulting you. At least, not when I wasn't."

Pinkie ignored Rainbow Dash's comment and decided to explain more about it. "No, they didn't just kiss me, they REALLY kissed me. Like, they put their tongue in my mouth..."

Then, Pinkie had a strange feeling creep up on her. Why wouldn't she be pretty? ...Why did she care if she was pretty or not? For some reason, it stuck at Pinkie's mind, Dash's comment. Maybe she just wanted to be told she was pretty, even if she wasn't?

Rainbow Dash looked confused. "I have...no clue what that's supposed to mean. Is that some sort of euphemism? Oh! You know what you should do? You should talk to Rarity. She knows about this kind of stuff. (I think.) Later!"

Dash hovered into the air and took off at speeds that could burn small insects, leaving Pinkie to consider her advice.

Pinkie shrugged and decided to do it. At least it was a lead, and that alone made it her best chance at getting any better understanding of the situation. She just hoped Rarity really did know something about it.

Bouncing her way to the Carousel Boutique, Pinkie entered to find Rarity ranting to her cat Opalescence about a client.

"I mean, really! Of all the nerve, how dare- Oh, hello, darling!" Rarity's mood switched tunes at the sight of Pinkie. "Does your dress I made need fixing? How did the date go, if I may be so bold for asking?"

"The date went fine." Pinkie answered. "It's what happened after that's bugging me."

"Oh?" Rarity sauntered over to her friend, her diamond eyes glistening with concern. "You can tell me anything, darling. What's troubling you?"

The door chime for the Carousel Boutique ran, and both Pinkie and Rarity were startled to see Twilight enter- holding her nice gray dress neatly folded in her hooves, no less.

"Hey, Rarit-tieeeee..." Whatever Twilight wanted, she didn't appear to be willing to stay too close to Pinkie to get it.

"What is it? Does your dress need fixing?" Rarity inquired.

Twilight started backing out of the Boutique, a sound like a forklift in reverse emanating from her as she did so.

"Twilight? Twilight Sparkle! Come back! What's wrong? Ooh..." Rarity sighed and shook her head. "I love the poor thing to death, but Twilight really has to learn what's socially appropriate." She turned back to Pinkie. "Now, what was your problem, Pinkie?"

"Somepony kissed me...really hard."

Rarity tilted her neck in confusion. "Hard?"

Pinkie nodded. "Uh-huh. They..." Pinkie was, for some reason, okay with telling Rarity more than she had told Rainbow Dash. Maybe because, since she was expecting Rarity to know more about it. So it was okay to tell her more. "Rubbed their chest up against mine and rubbed their hoof against my Cutie Mark."

Rarity's eyes were widened in disbelief and shock. She put her hoof over her mouth. "Oh my! Pinkie, darling, you should've spoken up sooner! Who did this to you!?"

"I, uh...a friend." Pinkie answered. There was no need for Rarity to do...whatever Rarity was probably planning to do, to Twilight.

"A friend? I can't imagine a friend doing that to...hold on." Rarity rubbed her chin with her hoof. "All right, then. Pinkie Pie. Did your friend have your permission to do this?"

"Well..."

"This is important, Pinkie Pie! Did they or did they not have permission!?"

"I, it, um, well..."

Pinkie flashbacked.

"Let me show you. Please?"

"Ummm...okay, I guess."

"...Yes." Pinkie answered resolutely after a long while. "Yes, they did."

"Okay." Rarity seemed to start to calm down a little, but she still looked on edge. "Did you know they were going to...kiss you really hard when you gave them permission?"

"Uh, no."

"Did you try to get them to stop once they did?"

"No..."

"Why not?"

"I...I didn't really know what they were doing."

Rarity rubbed her chin again, at a loss for ideas. She raised her hoof in the air, seemingly having gotten one. "If they tried to do it again, would you let them?"

Pinkie looked down. She didn't have the answer to that anymore than Rarity did.

It...did kinda feel...I don't know. Pinkie thought to herself.

"Pinkie?" Rarity asked, snapping Pinkie out of her thoughts.

"...Maybe."

"Maybe?" Rarity repeated, confused. "You mean, maybe you would let them do it again? As in, you might let them do it again, but there's no guarantee you would, yes?"

"I think so?" Pinkie questioned. Rarity's funny way of talking had befuddled her.

"I think you should have a talk with your friend." Rarity said like a scolding mother, trying to teach her foal the difference between right and wrong.

"I tried. She pointed her pet owl at me pretending it was a laser."

Rarity looked confused. "Pet...owl? Is your friend Twilight Sparkle? Is that why she left so awkwardly earlier?"

OH! Ponyfeathers!

"No." Pinkie answered calmly. She was no Twilight, or Rarity, but she realized yelling a denial would pretty much confirm it was Twilight.

"Oh...so it was another friend of yours who had a pet owl?"

"Uh-huh!" Pinkie nodded with a smile. Rarity gave her a piercing, penetrating leer that caused Pinkie to have a cold sweat, but she didn't break. When she didn't, Rarity decided to quit trying to press the issue.

"Well...will that be everything, darling?"

"I think so."

"Then have a nice day." Rarity returned to venting to her pet cat.

Pinkie left the Boutique and her head for a little bit, before bouncing her way ahead, waving to Twilight as she passed-

Twilight!?

Pinkie stepped backwards and looked at the lavender unicorn. Twilight still had her neatly-folded dress in hoof, and seemed motionless against the bushes just outside the Boutique. Paralyzed, one might say.

"Twilight?" Pinkie questioned softly.

Twilight raised her free hoof an expression of sorrow and disappointment on her face. She held her hoof against the air, like an invisible wall was keeping Pinkie from her.

"Twilight, I need to talk to you!"

Pinkie walked forward, but Twilight walked backwards in response, keeping the two of them separate.

"Twilight... can't we forget about last night and just have things go back to the way they were?" Pinkie pleaded, desperate.

Twilight's eye twitched. "NO! NO! I will not go back to the way things were! Do you know what is like for me, Pinkie Pie!? Always wanting you, always drooling when you touched me...always feeling better about myself when I saw a smile on your face...without having any idea WHY I was having those feelings...but now, now I know...now, I know that I'm- I was in love in you. Maybe this isn't ideal, and a little awkward. BUT IT'S BETTER THAN WHAT I'VE BEEN GOING THROUGH THE LAST WEEK!"

Pinkie was hurt by this. The last week? But- Twilight seemed open enough to hanging out with her for Celebratory-

"THE LAST SEVERAL WEEKS, IN FACT!"

Oh. That would explain it.

Twilight heaved and breathed heavily, teeth bared and eyes pointed forward in rage. Pinkie stepped back. She hadn't been expecting Twilight's reaction to be so volatile. Twilight saw the fear on her face and switched to a tone of remorse.

"Oh, Pinkie Pie, I'm sorry...I just...I've been having strange feelings, and now I finally know what they are- WERE! What they were, haha."

Were, she says. As in, past tense. Pinkie didn't know that. She didn't read a whole lot. Certainly not as much as the pony before her.

"Wait...you HAD feelings for me?" Pinkie didn't think she would be so upset about it, but for some reason, she was. The idea that such strong emotions could be discarded so easily was offensive by itself. But did Pinkie know that?

...Possibly. Maybe.

Twilight put her hoof over her mouth. "No! Yes! I mean... I... I don't love you! Not anymore! I don't...I don't..."

Twilight turned tail- literally- and bolted. She dropped her dress into the bushes, too...

Pinkie picked it up and pouted after Twilight had been long gone. Even as emotional challenged as she was, Pinkie could tell Twilight was in denial. She was trying to make herself think she wasn't in love with Pinkie anymore by simply denying it to Pinkie's face.

But in a contest between love and thinking, throughout written and much of unwritten history, thinking did not have an exactly high score of victories under its belt.

Twilight suddenly appeared right in front of Pinkie and put her hooves on Pinkie's shoulder-equivalent area. "I'm sorry. I do still completely love you. Please don't hate me."

Then, before Pinkie could do or say anything, Twilight took off again like a Road Runner bird.

"Twilight! Wait..." Pinkie weakly protested, hoof barely raised in the air.

Pinkie walked in around in circles, Twilight's dress still firmly in her hooves, wondering what to do. Then it hit her like a light bulb being turned on. What else did Pinkie do when she didn't know what to do? What was the one thing Pinkie always did, no matter the circumstances or how flimsy her excuse for doing it was?

Throw a party!

Duh! Why did it take her so long to think of that!?

Pinkie got a devious smile on her face in anticipation of her upcoming victory. Then she realized she was still holding Twilight's dress and started to wail. She didn't cry, though. She just made weird loud, sad noises with her Pinkie-style mouth.

Rarity exited out of the Boutique, wondering what those heart wrenching noises were. "Pinkie Pie? Was that you!?"

Pinkie composed herself and blushed while smiling nervously when she heard Rarity call her name. "Yeah...uh, could you help me with something? I'm going to throw a party! Can you make sure all our friends are there?"

"Of course, darling." Rarity assured, before noticing the object Pinkie held. "What are you doing with Twilight's dress?"

"Oh...nothing." Pinkie fibbed. "Here. Why don't you hold onto it in case she comes back for it?"

Rarity nodded, whisking the dress away with her magic.



Pinkie rubbed her hooves, her mind a-thinka-thinking about what she was going to do when Twilight showed up. If Twilight showed up.

Zooming her way back to her base of operations at the Corner, Pinkie began setting up the long arduous process of throwing a party for her friends. She also started to search the building for a secluded area to ambush Twilight in. She set up all the traps she knew how to set up to blast ponies with confetti when they leasted expected it. Afterwards, Pinkie went upstairs to her room and gave a long gaze to her space-minded pet alligator, Gummy.

"It'll be awhile before Rarity gets everypony over here." Pinkie reasoned with herself. "So, I have time for a power-nap!"

With that reasoning in mind, Pinkie flounced onto her bed. The sudden weight propelled Gummy into the air, and the poor reptile bounced up and down on the mattress before landing on his back put an end to the springy motion.

Pinkie fell right asleep.



A land of ice cream sweets, with cake-castles (or would that be castle-cake? Teehee! She didn't know!), chocolate fudge bricks and glowing marshmallow peeps speared on Candy Cane light poles. With smiley faces painted on or plastered over, well, everything. Gingerbread houses formed the neighborhood, while hollow chocolate bunnies frolicked. Naturally, this was where Pinkie had her dreams.

She bounced around, her usual oblivious smile on her face as she fudge all over her hooves. She stopped to nuzzle a stray bunny, then ate its tail. It chittered at her angrily, shaking its little bunny fist before dreamland physics kicked in and magically regrew its tail. Satisfied, the bunny left her alone.

Moving along, Pinkie peered into the windows of the gingerbread and made funny faces at her reflection in the glass pane. Finger puppets then appeared on the other side, making Pinkie feel bad about invading their privacy...before the puppets burst out laughing at her antics.

Pinkie, proud of herself for making even non-ponies laugh, continued on her way. She tripped over a candy cane on the road, and felt embarrassed as one of the glowing peep streetlights shorted out, electricity crackling from them. The candy cane she tripped on must have been a conduit. Giggling at her unintended mischief, Pinkie got up and admired the castle cakes in the distance before going on her way down the street.

Something started to feel...off to Pinkie, though, as she kept walking.

Eventually, she felt the ground beneath her shift. Looking down, she saw the fudge pavement she was used to being replaced by pink painted wood. Like...

Like Twilight's library.

Pinkie slowed down to a nervous trot. What was happening? Her dreams didn't usually involve Twilight's library...so why would they now?

Pinkie heard humming. Muted, soft...innocent humming. The cake castle in the distance started to fade away and be replaced by trees and plants. Pinkie didn't know it, but they were the kind of plants they were used for papyrus.

The humming got louder. Pinkie must've been getting close.

She saw it. There was some sort of enclave that was like somepony tried to recreate the library in an interactive dollhouse play set.

Pinkie grimaced as she saw an extremely innocent sight.

Twilight, staring at the mirror of a vanity, humming to herself as she brushed her hair with her magic.

Pinkie raised her hoof to say something, but put it down. Why did ponies do that, anyway? It's not like hooves could talk. Instead, she silently made her way towards the mirror.

"La-la-da-da-dee-da-da..." Twilight hummed.

Pinkie scrunched up, hesitant. She sighed before taking the plunge and stepping to where Twilight could see her in front of the mirror.

And Twilight was not happy to see her in the mirror.

"Uh...Twilight..." Pinkie said, crossing her legs nervously. "I know you're probably not happy to see me..."

Before Pinkie could get any further than that, there was a thud as Twilight dropped her brush against her vanity. She collapsed against it, burying her head in her legs and starting to cry.

"Twilight!" Pinkie cried urgently, rushing over. Twilight's tears dropped from the vanity and started to form small puddles around her. Pinkie wanted to hug Twilight. To make a funny face where she could see and laugh at. To tell her there was nothing to cry about. But Pinkie stepped into the puddle from the tears and sunk into it like a stone, even though the puddle was smaller than her hoof. She felt herself being carried away by a powerful water current, pushed further and further back.

Further away from Twilight, her friend.

Pinkie tried to raise her hoof out of the water and call to Twilight for help, but the water got deeper and started to flow into her mouth, making anything she said come out as just "Grrrgugullg!"




For once in his life, Gummy paid attention to what was going on around him. Namely, Pinkie's heaving breaths and noises like she was having trouble breathing. He did his usual routine of staring blankly before climbing over his owner's back and biting on her tail as hard he could. He had no teeth, so there was no pain, but the sudden jolt was enough to wake Pinkie... and release her from her torment. The first thing Pinkie did was curl around and embrace her loyal pet in a hug.

"Oh, Gummy!" Pinkie wailed. "It was awful! First there was cake and glowing peeps, but then there was Twilight and she was crying and I started drowning in her tears- LITERALLY!" Pinkie's eyes moistened, but she didn't actually cry. "Tears are supposed to be salty! But they didn't taste like salt AT ALL! They tasted like SORROW and DESPAIR!"

Pinkie heard the door chime ring.

"Oh!" Pinkie put Gummy down. "That must be Rarity and the girls for the party! I hope Twilight's ready to talk to me..."

Pinkie zoomed down the stairs to greet her friends. One by one, they piled into the corner. Applejack, Rainbow, Fluttershy...followed by Rarity, Spike, and Twilight in the back. Twilight gave Pinkie a sheepish smile and a wave, so that was progress at least.

No pony questioned what the occasion was, given who was throwing it, so they all simply settled into their party routines. Applejack and Dash competed with each other, Fluttershy stuck to a corner, trying to not be noticed, and Spike attempted to woo Rarity with technically-true-but-highly exaggerated tales of his accomplishments in the library.

Pinkie served some punch to the other ponies before nervously trying to make her way towards Twilight.

Come on. She thought to herself at her shyness. It's just Twilight.

Pinkie didn't notice her tail curling in on itself uncomfortably the closer she got to the group of unicorns.

"Is that so?" Rarity murmured at Spike's next tale, disinterested already. "Oh, hello, Pinkie! Any news?"

"No." Pinkie answered weakly. "I just wanna...talk to Twilight."

Twilight looked up, holding her punch glass in her hoof tight.

Rarity looked between the two of them. "I don't know what's going between you two, but I do so hope you sort it out before it becomes a problem. Come along, Spike."

Spike obliviously obeyed his crush's demands, leaving Pinkie and Twilight alone.

"Hi." Pinkie waved, trying to act normal.

"Hello." Twilight averted her gaze and took a sip from her cup. "...How are you?"

"Okay, mostly. Kinda concerned about you."

"...How considerate of you."

The two avoided the others' eyes and scuffed hooves. The awkward silence so thick and palpable that anypony nearby could feel it.

"Pinkie Pie, whatever I did to you in your dreams, I would never do that to you." Twilight said out of the blue.

"What!?" How did Twilight know Pinkie was having bad dreams involving her!?

"I...I'll bet your wondering how I knew that, huh?" Twilight offered.

"Y-yes!"

"I've been having some bad dreams of my own..." Twilight looked away wistfully. "I know a few things about it...your tail. It's all curled. More than usual, I mean."

Pinkie looked at her tail. It was, in fact, all scrunched up and knotted. She started kneading at it, trying to untie it. It took a while, but she eventually prevailed. But when she turned back to talk to Twilight some more, the unicorn was gone. Looking around, Pinkie saw she had gone over to Spike and was trying to talk to him. He wasn't really cooperating, so she grabbed his claw and dragged him over into the mares' restroom, despite his protests.

Pinkie had to wonder what was so important that it warranted dragging Spike into the bathroom that was not meant for his gender. Pinkie decided it was best to follow them inside. She saw Spike standing outside a stall, Twilight probably on the other side.

"What am I doing, exactly, Twilight?" Spike asked. It sounded like it wasn't the first time.

"I had voices in my head." Twilight answered. "I needed them for conversation, and they're gone, so now I need you to pretend to be them for me. Okay?"

From the way his lips were poised, Spike was going to answer that it was not okay, but he saw Pinkie Pie. And with her, an escape from his weird situation. "Oh, hey Pinkie Pie!"

Pinkie was too slow to tell him not to say her name.

"Pinkie's in here!?" Twilight exclaimed.

Pinkie shoved Spike out of the way and forced the stall open. "Twilight-" But she was only greeted with the white flash of a teleportation spell.

"Whoa." Spike whistled. He scratched his head while Pinkie looked at the floor in despair. "What's going on between you two?"

Pinkie shook her head sadly. "I wish I knew, Spike."

Pinkie left the bedroom and head upstairs for her bedroom. No pony noticed her sad, downed, defeated trots, too wrapped up in their own party activity.

As she got to her bed, Pinkie collapsed on it. Loyal Gummy was still lying there, not a care in the world. Pinkie envied him a little right now. No friends of his were going to go stick their tongues down his throats, certainly.

Ooh, is poor little Pinkie Pie feeling sad?

Pinkie's head popped up from her bed. Gummy wasn't talking. No pony else was in the room. Who said that?

In here, silly. We're in your head!

"In my...head?" Pinkie questioned out loud.

Yeah, yeah! Don't you remember? Twilight's missing the voices in her head. We're those voices! We were in her head, but then she resolved her internal conflict with herself, so messing with her quit bein' fun. So now we're in yours!

Pinkie hmmphed. "I'll have you now, I've had voices in my head before back on the farm, and they were a LOT nicer and less mean than you guys!"

Ooh, this one's got a temper on her!

"Get out!"

Aww, did we hurt the whittle Pinkie Pie's whittle feelings?-

"I SAID GET OUT!"

"Oh! Oh my, um, okay..."

Pinkie whirled around to see a very confused Mrs. Cake backing away from the door to her room.

"Oh no-no-no, Mrs. Cake!" Pinkie assured her. "I wasn't talking to you!"

Mrs. Cake was confused. There wasn't anypony else there, and it didn't look like somepony had jumped out the window. "Then...who were you talking to?"

Pinkie shifted her eyes, then grinned. "You wouldn't believe me if I told you."

"All right...I'll take your word for it. Your friends downstairs are wondering where you are. Is there something on your mind? Anything you would like to talk about?"

Pinkie sighed. "Yes, but I'm not sure you would be of any help."

"Oh...well." Mrs. Cake said as she moved to let Pinkie through. "If you need anything, just ask me or Mr. Cake, okay?"

"Okay. I will. Thank you..."

Pinkie made her way downstairs, where everypony greeted her.

"Heey! There's the party mare!" Dash said. "What's got you down, Pinks?"

Pinkie didn't answer the question. She looked around the room, seeing everypony stare at her with a friendliness that steadily grew into a concern the longer the silence lasted.

"Could I...talk to Rarity?" Pinkie asked, having an idea. "Alone?"

Everypony looked to Rarity. The marshmallow unicorn bravely stepped forward, giving her best glare of sympathy to Pinkie.

"Of course, darling."

They made their way to a corner of the room to have their hushed conversation.

"What is it, darling? Tell me everything." Rarity said in as soothingly a tone as possible.

"It's my friend." Pinkie told her. "I keep trying to talk to her, but she keeps finding ways to avoid me."

"Hmm..." Rarity looked away as she tried to solve Pinkie's problem. "Oh! I know! Try to find somewhere where she can't run away from you."

Pinkie didn't grasp Rarity's meaning. "Where she can't run away?"

"Yes! Somewhere there is no way for her to avoid you. Somewhere where she is completely trapped and has no choice but talk to you."

Pinkie thought long and hard, attempting to think of such a place. A place with no escape...with no exits or alternate pathways. One Twilight would be stuck in until Pinkie said her peace. But where could she find such a place? What kind of land would support that ideal? What kind of world would have the twists and turns necessary for that to happen? The longer Pinkie thought about it, the more it seemed like a pipe dream...

...EUREKA! That's it!

"Her dreams!" Pinkie proudly announce to a startled Rarity.

"Her dreams? Now, darling, that's not really what I meant-"

"Thanks, Rarity!" Pinkie grabbed Rarity's hoof and shook in thanks. "You've been a really, really big super-duper funtastic help with this! See you later! I've gotta get to Zecora's!"

"You're...welcome?" Rarity confusedly answered as Pinkie zoomed out of the confectionery.

It was brilliant! Pinkie thought to herself as she bounded for Zecora's hut in the Everfree Forest. She'd get Zecora to make a potion to let her enter Twilight's dreams, and then there would be no way for Twilight to run away!

There was absolutely, positively no way this could possibly go horribly, horribly, horribly wrong.



In the dead of night, a puff of green smoke wiggled in underneath the library door and curled into a tendril that unlocked the door and pulled it open. Zecora in her brown traveling cloak and Pinkie entered the room and looked around for anything that might give them away.

"I will ask you once more: Are you sure you want go through with this chore?" Zecora questioned Pinkie.

"Yes." Pinkie answered without hesitating. "Twilight's room is upstairs."

Pinkie led Zecora up the spiral staircase. It seemed much longer and more ominous than Pinkie remembered it being.

Being very, very, very careful to not wake anypony up, Pinkie poked the door open.

Inside, Twilight, Spike, and that durn owl were sleeping. The owl snapped to at the slightest disturbance, and Twilight writhed in her bed, only slightly perturbed.

Pinkie put her hooves together to silently plead with the owl not to hoot and wake up Twilight. The owl eyed her warily, then raised a feather. As if to say, "All right, but only this once."

Pinkie mouthed a thanks. She and Zecora weaved their way to the sleeping Twilight and looked over her.

"I will only ask you this one last time." Zecora whispered. "Are you sure you don't wish to change your mind?"

"Yes."

"Very well. In that case, climb atop Twilight Sparkle and drink the potion...and it will take you beyond the veil."

Pinkie was reluctant to just climb on top of Twilight like that, but she wormed her way onto of her. Zecora brandished the potion- a green liquid in a triangular beaker- and she gulped it.

Zecora wished her luck before disappearing in a poof of green dust.

Pinkie looked to Twilight's sleeping, oblivious, innocent face. But it only took a few seconds for the potion to take effect and knock her out.



Pinkie felt like she was being dragged through a tunnel before plopping against solid ground. Getting up, Pinkie didn't like Twilight's dream. Not in a "Oh man this is scary" way. More of a "Why would your dream BE this boring!?" way. Everything was black, and there was nothing here! No decorations or cake-castles or anything interesting at all!

"I don't believe this!" Pinkie shouted and cursed at nothing. "This is a dream! How do you make a dream this BOR-ing!?"

"Pinkie Pie?"

Pinkie's irises shrunk, and she turned around.

There was Twilight now, walking along like she was expecting to meet a friend here. She seemed quite surprised to see Pinkie Pie.

"Pinkie Pie!?" Twilight exclaimed with delight.

Pinkie waved and smiled. "Hi, Twilight."

Twilight galloped over to embrace and proceeded to nuzzle into Pinkie's chest. "I'm so glad you're here...I did this awful, awful thing to the real Pinkie yesterday, and knowing I can make you in my dreams now makes me feel so much better." She rubbed Pinkie's sides with her hooves affectionately.

Pinkie chuckled nervously, a sweat forming on her brow. "Uh-huh...eeyup!" She hoped Big Macintosh wouldn't mind her stealing his catchphrase.

Twilight nuzzled her and made a content little 'mmm' before stopping abruptly.

"...Wait."

Ooooh, dear. Pinkie wasn't actually part of Twilight's dream...and Twilight was starting to pick up on that fact. She began patting Pinkie across the sides of her legs, the back of Pinkie's neck, and some of her chest. Twilight removed her head from Pinkie's chest and drew up to stare Pinkie in the eye. Pinkie was starting to get the feeling this had been a bad idea.

"You're not part of my dream." Twilight stated.

Pinkie gulped nervously and nodded. "Uh-huh."

Twilight started walking around her in predatory, lion like circles. "So...what are you?"

"I'm, uh, Pinkie Pie."

Twilight stopped her pace and glared. "Well, I can see that." Twilight stepped back and adopted a battle ready stance. "I'll warn you, if you're one of those monsters I've read who feed on psychic energy, I know a dozen spells designed to make you overload."

"Well, uh..."

Twilight snorted and huffed. Pinkie heard resounding booms of thunder in the distance and rocking thuds of volcanoes. Two mini-volcanoes burst from the ground behind Twilight, with two full-grown dragon heads from the ground in front.

A really, really bad idea.

As Pinkie stared at the volcanoes in the distance, and dragons head in the ground, it occurred to her this really may not have been the best of ideas. This wasn't the real world, where everypony was expected to follow a certain set of social rules. This wasn't a place where the long hoof of the law would protect. This was Twilight's dreamvoid. Here, Twilight was queen. Here, Twilight was Princess Celestia, her will be done. If she was going to be in Twilight's dreams, she was going to play be Twilight's rules. If she was going to be here, she was going to play Twilight's games. No matter how extreme, ridiculous or even overtly dangerous they might be.

Faced with the possibility of being injured, Pinkie confessed to everything. With her usual way of rapid fire dialogue, of course.

"I wanted to talk to you about last night, but you kept avoiding me all day, so I talked to Rarity about what to do. And she gave the idea to go to Zecora's to make a potion so I could get into your dreams where you couldn't possibly avoid me anymore!" Pinkie gasped and took a deep breath.

The dragon heads and volcanoes sunk back into the ground. Twilight stared. Pinkie smiled awkwardly in response.

"...You took a potion to get inside my dream? Pinkie, do you realize how much a TOTAL invasion of privacy and personal space that is!?"

"Sure I do! ...What's personal space?"

Twilight facehooved before turning around, clearly angry about Pinkie's methods.

"I just... wanted to talk!" Pinkie protested. Twilight huffed, not even bothering to look at her. "Twilight, what do you want me to do?"

Twilight looked over her wither at her. "Play some music for me."

Pinkie looked around the void. "I, uh, don't have an instrument."

Pinkie heard a rattling crash behind her. She turned around to see a pile of instruments with almost anything she could think of in it- pianos, keyboards, chellos, violins, guitars, electric guitars, and even the oft-neglected electric banjo.

"Pick one." Twilight demanded.

Pinkie started climbing up the pile and sifting through.

"Just one." She heard Twilight snap.

Pinkie picked up a tambourine and held it out where Twilight could see.

"Are you sure?"

Pinkie nodded. She felt a rather jarring disruption in weight as the pile of instruments she was standing on disappeared completely.

"Now play." Twilight growled. A vanity and a hairbrush appeared to Twilight's side, which the unicorn faced and levitated the brush to her hair. Meanwhile, Pinkie played the tambourine as best she could in her fright, which only intensified from seeing the same thing in Twilight's dream as was in hers. A coincidence, without a doubt, but that did nothing to make it less terrifying. Twilight eventually tossed the brush aside, which landed right in front of Pinkie and hissed like it was smoking hot before turning into ink and disappearing into the floor.

Pinkie looked down at before returning her gaze to Twilight. Twilight walked up, like she was on an invisible spiral staircase. From the rising stairs, she gave Pinkie a glare.

"Did I say you could stop!?"

Pinkie didn't even realize she had stopped playing when she had looked at the brush. She immediately resumed, rushing to bang on the hoofheld drum before Twilight lashed out again. Twilight's ears winced from the sound. Pinkie's hurry had made the drum not sound very harmonious.

"Slow down!"

Pinkie did.

"That's better." Twilight muttered before continuing up her invisible staircase. She stopped and pulled out a book from nothingness, like the staircase had an invisible shelf to go with it. She opened the book and skimmed through it before tossing it to the floor as well. Pinkie took a look at it. The pages were blank. She could least pick up that before the book followed the hairbrush's example of melting into ink.

Suddenly, Twilight dropped back to the ground, a clattering noise like the staircase had crumbled away echoing. Pinkie tossed aside her tambourine before rushing to Twilight's aid.

"Twilight? Are you okay?"

Pinkie wasn't expecting Twilight's response to be what it was.

"NAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH! Why is it so hard to stay mad at you!?"

Pinkie just frowned while Twilight glared at her. Said glare subsided quickly, and was replaced a soft, quiet sob.

"It's because you're beautiful." Twilight muttered, covering her face with her hooves.

Pinkie became intrigued. For some reason, Twilight's words sticking out. Probably something to do with Dash's comment earlier.

"You think I'm beautiful, Twilight?"

Twilight peered one eye out from her hooves. "Beautiful. Voluptuous. Curvaceous. Irresistible. Charming." Twilight kept going on, using words from foreign tongues Pinkie didn't understand. Like Spanish. Or maybe French.

Or maybe the Black Speech of Cthulhu and Related Ideas.

...Actually, now that she had that thought, Pinkie was quite certain that it was, indeed, the Black Speech of Cthulhu and Related Ideas.

Twilight rolled over onto her stomach and looked Pinkie Pie dead in the eye with a steel in her vision to quash any doubt of what she was about to say being true or not.

"I think you're gorgeous."

Twilight's gaze did not falter once.

Pinkie was unsure how to feel about this. Her mouth was open with the intent to say something, but her brain was dry on words.

"Why?" Was the first word Pinkie could form.

Twilight tapped her hoof, uncertain herself. "Well...what do you do with all your time? What do you try to make everypony around do?"

Pinkie had to think on this one for a moment. She shouldn't have had to, as the answer was obvious.

"Smile!"

Twilight nodded. "Mh-hmm...and what do you want for all the trouble you go through? What do you want back from all the time you spend on that?"

Pinkie was confused. "Umm...you know what, Twilight? A smile is really all I need."

"There." Twilight pointed. "That is why I think you're gorgeous. You put all this energy and time and effort into making ponies smile, and you never ask for anything back. That-that's... beautiful."

"Huh." Pinkie sat down on her belly and put a hoof on Twilight's. "Okay...so...what do I do wrong to make you cry last night, Twilight?"

Twilight blinked. "What?"

"What did I do to make you cry last night!?"

Twilight stared...and stared...and stared...and stared. However, her lip curled upward at some point and she started giggling in a very unsettling manner.

"You...hehehe...heeheeehahahaa! You want to know what YOU did wrong? That's- oooh, THAT is- what's the word? HILARIOUS! Am I using that term correctly? I think I am. HA-HAA!"

"...Twilight, you're making me worry."

Twilight took in a deep breath. "I took you for granted. I kissed you, made out with you, took advantage of your innocence...and you want to know what you did wrong!? That's so...I don't even...oh, Pinkie Pie..."

Twilight collapsed, defeated.

Pinkie didn't know what to do. Looking around, she couldn't find any inspiration from the sprawling infinite blackness. Thinking back to the incident on the counter, Pinkie finally had an idea of what she had to do.

She walked forward to the exhausted and drained Twilight, who only looked at her with only the slightest interest.

Pinkie took in a deep breath and put her hooves on Twilight's cheeks. Twilight's slight interest turned to confusion.

Closing her eyes, Pinkie dared the unthinkable in a twist Twilight would never predict.

Pinkie kissed her. She even used a little tongue, going off Twilight's example from the previous night.

Pinkie dropped Twilight and started backing away. She started to feel the effects of the potion wear off. The gravitational drag from being jerked backed up the 'tunnel' winded it's away around her.

"Uh...see you tomorrow." Pinkie waved good-bye at the stunned Twilight.

Twilight yawned adorably before she woke up the next morning. Stretching her hooves, she rose up off the bed slightly.




"Hey, Twilight." Spike greeted groggily. This being one of the few times where they woke up at the same time. "Sleep well?"

"Yes..." Twilight answered dreamily, wiggling like a disoriented snake as she remembered what happened in her dream. "I had the best dream ever..."

Twilight smacked her tongue against the roof of her mouth.

Wait...no, no, that's not possible...

Twilight wiggled her tongue around. There was a distinct slimy aftertaste in her mouth. Like somepony had made out with her.

...Maybe it wasn't a dream.

Twilight hurled her covers and dashed for the stairs.

"Where's the fire?" asked Spike.

"I need to go to Sugarcube Corner! No time to explain!"

"Do you want me to go with you?" Spike asked between yawning.

"No!"

Twilight went out the library and made a beeline for Sugarcube Corner. She wasn't sure what happened, how it happened, or any number of things, but she wanted to see Pinkie.

She had to ask.

She had to know.

She wanted to know.

She NEEDED to know.

Barging her way into Subercube Corner, Twilight made absolutely no notice of Mrs. Cake polite greetings or understandable inquires into where she was going.

Without knocking, she barged into Pinkie's room and found her the object of her affections lying on her bed. She look tired and was breathing heavily. Like she didn't sleep very well.

"Pinkie!"

Pinkie jolted awake at the sound of her name. She look at the door and saw Twilight. "Oh!...Hi."

"Pinkie..." Twilight said softly. Twilight sat on Pinkie's bed and grabbed Pinkie's hooves. "I need to know something about last night."

"Oh...oh. Okay."

Twilight took in a deep breath, preparing to pop the question. A question that the answer to could either make her the happiest mare in the world, or leave her a broken wreck for years.

"Do you love me?"

Pinkie's lip quivered. Her eyes wavered. Her throat bulged as she gulped.

"No."

The answer made everything seem surreal to Twilight. She let go of Pinkie's hoof and turned away to start crying.

Pinkie grabbed her hoof back and held it with both of her own.

"But..."

She gave Twilight's hoof a little kiss the way Canterlot gentlecolts do to important mares of important status. When she was done, she looked Twilight in the eye.

"I don't like making ponies sad...so...let's...give this a shot. I mean, what's the worst that could happen, right?" She smiled nervously.

Twilight was speechless. She kept opening her mouth, but nothing came out. She burst into tears and wrapped her front legs around Pinkie.

"Oh, Pinkie Pie!" Twilight cried rapturously. "You have...no idea how happy that makes me."

Pinkie was okay with Twilight crying now. The warm sting of her tears of joy felt nice on her traveling down withers.

"I like making ponies happy..."

"I-...I know you do."