Twilight Sparkle has never seen the need to venture into the realms of Humanity, but when Pinkie Pie receives six invitations the grand opening of her sister's fine dining restaurant in Singapore, she swallows her apprehension and follows.
Twilight Sparkle has never seen the need to venture into the realms of Humanity, but when Pinkie Pie receives six invitations the grand opening of her sister's fine dining restaurant in Singapore, she swallows her apprehension and takes the plunge into the wondrous magical void that is the human's domain. A world of steel, glass and machines that defy the very laws of magic.
And stranger still, are the ponies that make their livelihoods amidst the madness. Pinkie's sister amongst them.
Yet, even for such a foreign land, the troubles of home are deceptively close indeed.
Humans: The Canterlot Conspiracy, by Dr L. Heartstrings.
A History of Pony-Human Interaction from the Old Kingdom to the New, by Lord Righteous Rule III.
There, the books sat, illuminated in the light of summer.
“Um, Twilight.” Applebloom said. The young filly trotted forwards and placed both fore hooves atop the low desk, gazing at each of the books in turn. ”Don't ya' have anything else?”
It was late afternoon in the Golden Oaks Library, and the sun was beginning its descent; its read gold rays shone through the window panes, and bathed the dim interior of the great oak tree in warm light. Twilight looked on glumly as three inquisitive fillies stared forlornly at her proffered reading material. Couldn't they have asked about something well, I know more about? she complained inwardly. She didn't enjoy the feeling of being wrong footed.
“Yeah, Twilight.” Scottaloo exclaimed, stepping up besides her friend. “We're looking the good stuff! You know, the really down -and-dirty, nice-and-juicy stories about em'. Don't hold out on us!”
“Um, I'm afraid that this is it, girls. Twilight mumbled as she looked at the crusaders glumly. She swept a hoof towards the library's laden shelves. “There's absolutely nothing else on the subject of Humans in the library and I'm not surprised; it's kind of a 'niche' subject. To be very honest with you, girls, I'm the wrong mare for the job - er, and if I may ask, what's going on with the sudden interest in the Humans anyway?”
“I'm glad you asked, Twilight, ” Sweetie Belle had said sweetly. She trotted over and joined the two crusaders at the reception desk. “We have something super special planned for the Autumn Bake Sale later this year. It's gonna' blow the competition to smithereens.”
“Something flashy!”
“Something impressive!”
“Something powerful!”
“Which is?” Twilight asked dryly.
“The coolest and best-est of Autumn Themed Human Cuisine!” The Crusaders cried out in union. “We're gonna' make an Autumnic Bun! We're gonna' try for the baking, engineering and coercive diplomacy cutie marks all at once!”
“Was there a mark for Coercive Diplomacy?” Twilight parroted, as she fought down a snort. “Really? You want to make an, Autmnic... Bun heh. Just where did you girls get this idea from? I mean, I'm not an expert on Humans and Human matters, but even I know that making of of those things is a really, really, really, really bad id-”
“Sure we do, Twilight!” Apple Bloom cried, as she tapped the desk with a hoof. “It's a really Badass idea!” Come'on Scoots, Sweetie, let's show her we know our stuff! It's a-” they exchanged significant glances.
“It's a bun that transform into a giant mushroom when you light the candle on it!” they answered cheerfully. “How cool is that? Lyra helped us come up with it!”
“Er... I don't quite follow...” Twilight shrugged and quietly gave up. Sometimes the Crusader's (and certain unicorns') trains of thought, would run off the tracks, over a bridge, down a ravine and usually resulted in a spectacular explosion that sent flaming debris raining down upon a mime academy. She throught as the three fillies gazed up at her approvingly. The results would be painful, or funny. Quite possibly both.
“You know what, girls?” She said, as she forced a cheery smile to her face. “I don't really want to know any more. Ju-just take whichever of the books you think you need – I personally recommend Lord Regal Rule's Histories – he's one of the few ponies out there who's been across the Equestrian Barrier and I think he knows his stuff really well-”
The three fillies exchanged glances and quick as lightning, three sets of hooves shot out and snatched the comic books and the gossip rag out from under Twilight's nose. Before she knew it, they had rocketed straight out the door and headlong into whichever misadventure they had planned ahead. All that remained of their presence were three squeakily excited voices that tittered from outside, even as Lord Regal's Histories sat forlornly upon the desk.
“We're so gonna' be a hit at the bake sale! Gonna' make an impact, even!”
“Aww, Scoots, don'tcha think we should have taken that big book instead?”
“No way, Sweetie. We're looking for something cool like battle baking, and we're not gonna' find it in a boring ol' history book. Besides, we all heard Twilight say she wasn't the mare for these sort of thing – but that's all right. That's what Lyra is for; she'll answer any questions on the hard stuff.”
“Ohhhh... so are we're gonna' be all right then?”
“Darn tootin' Sweetie. We'll be more than all right! It's gonna' be a bomb!”
Twilight resisted the urge to bash her head against the table as the voices retreated into the distance. She liked the Crusaders as much as anyone else, but... couldn't they at least be a little more informed before they jumped to conclusions? But with any luck the Crusader cooking project would end right there and then. Lyra, for all her self directed endorsement, was in all likelihood just as equally clueless regarding the subject of Humans as her earnest little protégées. Soon, the they would eventually tire and move on to less potentially disastrous projects.
I hope.
On the up side of things, the lesser distraction had gone, and Twilight could finally return her attention to more pressing matters - the greater distraction; which took the form of Pinkie Pie. The pink coated mare was comfortably ensconced in her sitting room, where her bottom was depressed into some of the best cushions in the library. At the the table lay six identical tickets, made of material that Twilight had not seen before, all of them embossed with a winged emblem and blocky uniform text, akin to the results of a printing press. Twilight noted with some minor irritation that her bowl of honey baked apple crisps had been emptied.
“Alright, Pinkie. “ Twilight said as she sank into her own cushion across from her pink coloured friend. “The Crusaders have gone on their way. Lets continue, shall we?”
“Oooh!' Pinkie Pie beamed. “Awesome! Now where was I? Oh right, I was in the middle of saying please! Please? Please, please, please, please, please?” Pinkie Pie pleaded, her best impression of the famed Crystal Empire Begging Mastiff when faced with a treat, plastered upon her face. “Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeese? I really, really, really really want you all to be there with me! Look, Inkey Pie even sent enough tickets for all of us!”
“Pinkie,” Twilight said, leaning in closely. She had been through this before. Several times, in fact. “You know perfectly well that the Human Earth is a dangerous place! From what I've read, to get anywhere out there at all, you'll have to lash yourself to a giant metal container, powered by explosive reactions that fling you across the sky; with one of those Human at the wheel no less. Does that sound remotely fun to you?”
“I know right!” Pinkie exclaimed happily, loud enough to rattle the teacups in their saucers. “Doesn't that sound like an adventure! I'd bet Rainbow Dash would like it!”
“Pinkie,” Twilight sighed, and assumed her most stern and lecturing tone. “Don't you know how dangerous Human Earth is?”
“Nope. Not a clue.” Pinkie smiled. “But that's where you come in, right, Twilight? With you around, we'll have nothing to worry about!”
“What? No!” Twilight yelped, taken aback. “Pinkie, the Earth is a magical void – it leaches dilutes magic, which means no spells and no flying. Nothing at all! Well... not necessarily true, but even so, any form of mage-craft would be significantly retarded.” She spieled, as she looked across the table to Pinkie with the gravest demeanour she could manage. "If your aeroplane were to, say, fall out of the sky, I probably couldn't teleport myself across the length of this room, let alone all six of us. And that's not the mention the wild weather, and the mind boggling number of things that want to kill you. It's not the place for me – or for any of us.”
“But-”
“But nothing Pinkie!” Twilight interrupted, agitated. “I'm no expert on Humans, but even I can tell you they're bloodthirsty as anything else out of the Everfree!They fought their last great war amongst themselves – I dunno', like, five minutes ago?”
“But Inkey's been there three years and no one's tried to declare war on her yet!” Pinkie whined. “ She's even opening her third restaurant, ya' know? It's called Inkey's Bistro by the Marina, right down town in Sunny Singapore – and she's invited me – and all of you too for the grand opening! I mean, doesn't 'Sunny Singapore' just sound so sinfully stupendous!?”
“I dunno' Pinkie.” Twilight sighed. Within her mind, the gears and cogs creaked, trying to dredge up some titbit of information, anything at all to dissuade her friend from embarking on this disastrous vacation. “Isn't Singapore in civil war right now?” She finished lamely. What does 'singapore' even mean anyway?
“Oh Twilight, you're so funny!' Pinkie giggled. “Of course Singapore's in civil war – they're gonna' be fighting each other for reservations at Inkey's place! Also, Singapore means 'The Lion's City,' or something like that. Cool, huh?”
“Ah...” Twilight sighed, and tried not to think too hard. “That's very... informative. But look, Pinkie, we can't all just pack up and leave Equestria at the drop of a hat. We all have responsibilities here! Rarity has her boutique, and A.J, her farm. Fluttershy has her animals and Rainbow has.... Rainbow has? Well, er... in any case she's probably busy.”
“Not to worry, Twilight,” Pinkie said, nodding sagely. “I checked before hand and they're all available.”
“Really?”
“Really, really!”
“But,” Twilight sighed, falling back to her final contingency. “But...eh, I need to be right here just in case the Princess needs me!”
“Ha! I've prepared for this too!” Pinkie cried, a smug grin upon her face. “Right...about...now!”
“Wha?”
As if on cue, the recumbent form of Spike sat up stock still, in his basket, a bemused expression plastered on his face. His eyes widened as he belched and a fiery gout of emerald dragonfire erupted from his throat. An intense flame which then congealed into sealed letter, penned in a familiar stationary.
“Thanks Spike,” Pinkie called and received a weary thumbs up in reply.
Twilight gaped as the letter was deposited into her waiting hooves. Swallowing a brief spark of irritation, she tore the wax seal away and read.
My Dearest Student, Twilight Sparkle
While I am exceedingly happy to hear that you take your responsibilities to Ponyville and Equestria so seriously, you needn't have hesitated to decide on a vacation beyond the barrier. You are young still and you should not feel you are constrained against going to see the world.
Please go with your friends. I am sure that Luna and I can hold the fort for a week or two. You may consider it an order. You do need a little break.
Yours Sincerely, Princess Celestia.
P.S Please bring back some of those White Rabbit Candy things. Luna loves them. P.S.S We most certainly do not! Do not let mine sister conceal her uncouth gluttony. Had we not intercepted this, we would have been slandered and-
Twilight sighed.. “Pinkie! Why?”
“Oh, Applejack and I were talking over cider, the other night” Pinkie said, as she leant on the table. “ And the subject fell upon what kind of problems I could expect, and what I could do -and Princess Celly did say that all of us are free to write to her.” She sat there so perfectly innocent that there was almost a halo.
“And was I top of the list of problems?” Twilight sighed, defeated. “Alright Pinkie, I'll bite... if the Princess thinks it isn't that bad of an idea, then I guess I'm gonna' have to hear you out at the very least. How long a vacation are we talking about?”
And that had been the end of that.
[===]
This was a bad idea from the start. Twilight thought to herself as the carriage banged and rattled its way across the arid badlands that lay west of the Cantermount. They had left Spike behind at her parent's place, dragons could not cross the barrier, and she missed him already, but it was more than just that.
It wasn't the way the window panes rattled in their brackets, or the dry, dull heat of the badlands in summer or even Pinkie Pie's rendition of ninety-nine buckets of oats on the wall, which had been repeated thrice. Those discomforts, Twilight could endure with good grace. It was the large herd of angry looking ponies that shared the carriage with them that contributed greatly to an awkward atmosphere; fifty or more of the sign wielding ponies, distributed throughout the length of the train.
“Keep your dirty hooves out of Equestria.” Rarity read one of the signs, her expression disapproving. “What a charming bunch. All in all, an auspicious start to our little trip.”
“Oh, I don't know, Rarity” Fluttershy whispered as she gazed furtively at the grim gang. “They do look so very serious – maybe its something important.” She turned her butter yellow head towards another sign bearer. “Look at that. Keep Les Mis out of Equestria. Think of the children. I don't know what a Les Mis is but it does sound bad....”
“See that one! Magic > Monkeys?” Rainbow Dash complained. “What does that even mean? These bozos are seriously getting me down; its just depressin' .”
“Not a clue, Rainbow.” Applejack commented sleepily. “Ah' thought it sounded like the name of a rock band. What say ya', Twi?”
“Um,“ Twilight ventured. “I'm just as lost as you are, I'm afraid,” she conceded finally.
“What's this?” Rainbow Dash said, in mock wonderment. “So there is something Twilight Sparkle doesn't know after all.”She laughed as she turned to Applejack, who was lounging against a cushion. “A.J, you owe me a bit.”
“In ya' dreams, Rainbow.”
“Oh har har har.” Twilight said, her voice acid. “ Just because a sign says, magic on it, it doesn't automatically means I know anything about it.”
“Girls,” Pinkie's voice wafted over, her tone hushed, reverent even.
“Well, Twilight darling.” Rarity shrugged. “You are a lady of letters after all. Was it a stretch of imagination that we assumed that you would be happy reading up on everything pertaining to our destination?”
“Well, no. But I had that report on Theoretical Thaumaturgic Theosis to finish,” Twilight grumbled. “I don't know why, but ever since we got back from the Crystal Empire, the Princess has been unusually insistent that I get a working familiarity with it; I never thought I'd say that I could be sick of reading up on something, but I am.”
“Girls!”
“Wow,” Rainbow Dash quipped. “You're sick of reading? What's next? Is A.J gonna' give up apple farmin' and take up egghead hocus-pocus?”
“When pigs fly, Rainbow!” Applejack laughed from where she lay. “And the day I take up Hocus-pocus is the day you-”
“GIRLS!”
Twilight jumped and the rest of her friends fidgeted uncomfortably in their seats. Something was happening. Around her, the six's fellow passengers shifted in their seats, an electric wave of excitement running through the carriage. Signboards and banners were forgotten as ponies stepped towards the glass, goggling at something far ahead at the horizon.
“-welp, ah'm impressed.” Applejack finished.
“Look!” Pinkie Pie cried, gesturing towards the window panes. “Can you see it?”
Twilight gulped, and looked and looked and looked. And what she saw sent a shiver down her spine. There, towering in the distance, was a silvery window that split the very horizon. It was higher than the clouds and as wide as a mountain. A picture frame of nothingness that held the immeasurable vastness of an alien universe within its confines. A world known to the denizens of Equestria by more names than memory could remember. Vast beyond imagination and the subject of songs and stories throughout the ages; of riches and wonders, and yet also, suffering and death. And yet, also, a world ignored – a good many ponies would rather pretend it didn't exist at all.
“Human Earth.” Twilight whispered. “And, that must be the Great Barrier of course. It's the only way through – the only thing holding it back... I've read about it, but... wow. Just wow.”
“Can't you just feel that?” Rarity whispered, her voice hushed, awestruck. “I've felt plenty of potent spellwork in my time, thanks to you Twilight, dear, but that! That is just something extraordinary! Wha-what is it?”
“I've read about that,” Twilight said, her eyes distant. “You know how persistent enchantments require a framework of aetheric lattices and spell bindings designed to maintain that enchantment? Some of those are so immense, so incredible, that they become just as famed as anything else – that one is called the 'Gatehouse' and it maintains the barrier... well feel it for yourself.”
Rarity shivered. “Goodness...”
“If ya' feeling' what ah'm feelin', Rarity.” Applejack mumbled, her eyes wide. “That has gotta' some mighty impressive hocus-pocus, if even ah' can feel it. It's gotta' be strong ol' Kingdom stuff, or ah' ain't an Apple. And what ah' wanna' know is jus' how we managed to miss that gi'normous thing the first time we were around these parts?”
“Dashie!” Fluttershy whispered. “Look! Your feathers!”
“Aww, darn, I just preened them this morning!” Came Rainbow's irritated reply as she spread her wings for a closer look. “Yours too, Fluttershy. I dunno' about you, but mine are all tingly...”
The two pegasi looked at one another, their feathers fluffing up, and burst into laughter.
“Pinkie, “ Twilight whispered, as she turned to her last friend. “Are you okay?”
“My Pinkie Sense is going off the charts.” Pinkie replied, uncharacteristically calm. “If I were a robot, this is where I would go, 'Beep Boop. Can not compute”
“What's a robot?”
“Oh Twilight, you're so funny.” Pinkie giggled halfheartedly, though Twilight noted that her pink friend's eyes were a little wild. “You'll see once we go through.”
Not wanting to argue, Twilight just nodded, and turned back to the window.
They were not the only ones. Around them, their fellow passengers oohed and aahed and for a brief moment, the gloomy atmosphere was swept away, leaving only a big group of dumbstruck tourists. And then, just like that, the moment ended. The incredible vista was blocked as another train thundered past their own, hurtling away from the barrier at great speed. It was not a passenger carriage of polished wood; but rather a great steel behemoth that bore gargantuan machine parts; immense gears and bits of black metal, lashed down with chains thicker than a pony's leg.
“Oh my.” Fluttershy breathed as she looked on. “What do you think those are for?
“I dunno'.” Twilight sighed. “A robot, I suppose?” she said, and watched as Pinkie shrugged.
“Oh, no Twilight, dear.” Rarity said as she turned away from juggernaut of a train that rumbled by. “If I'm not wrong, I'd say that those are gears, ironwork and cables for the Manehattan's new Golden Delicious Gate Bridge, which will open on the New Years.”
“No way! How do you know? Metal ain't your thing.” Rainbow asked. “Ooh, I'm Rarity! Keep your heavy, nasty, rusty, smelly iron awaaaaay from meeeee! It'll stain my fancy doilies!” She chuckled as Rarity shot her a dirty look.
“Well, Rarity, you've never struck me as the type to be interested in metallurgy.” Twilight agreed.
“Dear me, girls, girls!” Rarity said airily. “A lady must be educated on a wide variety of topics. It helps when mingling with high society – for example, I discuss fashion trends with Baroness Fluer Lis De in the morning, politics with Princess Cadance at lunch and economics with Fancypants at dinner.”
“Booooring,” Rainbow laughed. “What does wherever you get your metal from got to do with anything anyway? Just go diggin' for it, if you want some so bad.”
“Well, if you must know, Rainbow,” Rarity began, her voice taking a lecturing tone. “Whilst Equestria possesses great mineral wealth in gems and gold and opals, we do have a great lack of iron, and by extension, steel.” She said, as she glanced towards the towering barrier in the distance. “Compounding the problem, Equestria has also almost no industrial capacity to process and shape pig iron whatsoever, and so, almost everything we have comes from, well, outside I wonder, sometimes, if Manehattan and Detrot know where their building parts and machines actually come from...heehee.”
She tittered nervously, as she caught both Twilight's and Rainbow Dashs's stunned appearances. “Well, it's nothing special, really. I just pick up bits and pieces from causal conversations with Fancypants and his associates. He is such a knowledgeable stallion. I mean, did you know that he's just imported several motorized boats to replace the old Manehattan Fancy Cruise Line. I might even go for a ride on one of them when I head down there next year for the Fashion Show.”
“Rarity, I am impressed.” Twilight admitted grudgingly. “You really do know your stuff. Dad, Mum and Shining always tell me I should spend a little time learning about that sort of thing but...well ...you know... I've never found the time. But I suppose I can't really expect the Princess to provide me with a stipend forever.”
“You've lost me at the 'industrial capacity' bit.” Rainbow shrugged. “And cruises? Boooring.”
“Really, Rainbow?” Rarity said. “Aren't you the least bit interested to know where all of your ironwork comes from? I, for one, know that my sewing machines come from the finest artisans in the Kingdom of Germany. Whilst, that insufferable Hoity Toity purchases his team's machines from a place called the Principality of Taiwan.” She said smugly. “I hope this kindles your interest in worldly matters.”
“Nope. Not at all.” Rainbow mouthed. “And now you've killed any interest I may had so hard that it died with its whole family. In a fire.”
“Girls.” Twilight sighed, but Rarity and Rainbow smiled good-naturedly at one another.
“Ladies and Gentlemen,” The conductor's voice came, amplified by a palpable surge of magic. “ We will be arriving at Hippocampus Station shortly. If this is your first visit to the Hippocamp-Barrier Region, please be notified that you may experience momentary nausea. A medical clinic and sick bay is available in the station. Thank you for choosing Fancy Railways for your journey and we wish you a pleasant trip beyond the barrier.”
“That... doesn't sound very pleasant.” Fluttershy murmured as they drew along side a paved station platform and the carriage shuddered to a stop.
“Oh, we'll be fine.” Pinkie huffed. “I get nauseous all the time! I change diapers on a regular basis for hoof's sake! Bring it on barrier! Pinkie's ready for ya'!”
The carriage began to empty as ponies picked up their signs and disembarked, but the heavy atmosphere remained. Outside the carriage, the platform was awash with ponies, milling about the paved walkway towards the barrier, which seemed to stretch on endlessly into the heavens now that they were right at its door step. From beyond, shone a cold, pale light, an unnatural contrast with the arid heat of the badlands summer. A cold, chilly gust seemed to blow in from nowhere, palpable even inside the carriage and Twilight felt goosebumps rise as she realized she could detect the smell of salt in the air – a thousand Canterlot Stadia away from Manehattan and the sea.
“Let's go, shall we?” Twilight said, as she retrieved her trunk from the rack.
“Let's,” the girls said, almost as one, as the filed out into the open air.
Twilight found it cold, surprisingly cold. And the salty smell of the air only intensified as the cantered across the platform to the turnstiles.
“First Timers!” A great gruff voice called out, booming across the station platform alike a peal of thunder. “First Timers! If this is your first time going through the Barrier, step right up! Don't be shy! First Timers over here!” As it turned out, Twilight found the source of the commotion to be a sentry, clad in the standard burnished bronze of the guard. He, however had a crimson sash with a embroidered train on it tied to one fore leg. “Hey! You pretty girls are first timers? No?”
Twilight cringed and Rarity alongside her, but both Rainbow and A.J exchanged ribald grins. “We haven't crossed the barrier before, if that's what you mean,” Pinkie said happily.
“Well, you've come to the right place then.” He cried, gesturing to a chart. “The line for the special assisted crossing starts right'o here. Oh, and how long will your trip be?”
“A week.” Pinkie continued. Twilight nodded, along with the rest of her friends.
“A week eh?” The Functionary said, as he gazed intently into his documents. “Well, then you ought to be just fine without.”
“Without what?” Twilight asked, worried.
“Vitamins!” The guard barked out with a laugh. “But between you and me, pretty lady, I'm guessing it's jus' something the apothecary’s union tells us so we buy more of their stuff.” He finished as he nuzzled open the security gate. “Gate's open! Go through! That's it, nice and easy....”
Twilight stepped through, the feeling of unease welling up within her. Celestia's student she may have been, but the magic that formed the fabric of the Great Barrier was as alien to her as the world that it contained. She looked up, onwards and onwards and out of habit, and curiosity, she assumed a partial meditative state – one that the Princess had taught her; to feel, and visualize the lattice of the spell work within her mind.
Terrifying She decided. It seemed to stretch for miles in all directions – the novelty of barrier itself was dwarfed by the intricacies of the ancient spell mechanism. Twilight did not know why, but her heart ached, even visualizing it, the monument of aether her books identified as the Gatehouse. And the void it warded against, which chilled her to the bone. If the endless distances of spell mechanism were lines of Aether, glowing with the light of love, the void was nothing at all. All in all, it invoked a primal urge within her, half to sate her curiosity and half again to flee in terror. And regret – regret that her friends could not share in what she were seeing.
I could spend years here, studying the Gatehouse and the Barrier. No one else has done that. I wouldn't even have to cross at all She thought, awestruck. I could have my own little cottage – Live it out just like Daring Do. I'd like that...
“Okay, you girls!” The guard cried, breaking Twilight from her reverie as he paced a circuit around them. “There are a lot of stories about the barrier and even more about Earth – most of them are bullshit. I am going to tell you a few things that will make the crossing easier on you.”
Twilight looked ahead, now attentive. Along side her, her friends stiffened, preparing themselves. Pinkie Pie wore a serious expression, complemented with a colander helmet, whilst A.J simply looked determined, an expression she shared with Rarity. Fluttershy faced onwards with a calm acceptance, whilst it was Rainbow that looked like she was going to sick up.
“One. You may experience a mild shock. Keep going. Do not stop.”
“Two. You may experience some lethargy. I am told the natives call it 'gravity'. Keep going. Do not stop!”
“Three. You may hear your friends cry for help. Keep going. Do not stop.
“Four. You will be scared. You will be frightened. You may piss yourself. We've all been there – Keep going! And do not stop!”
“Last and not least!” The guard shouted, gazing at each of them for emphasis. “Listen to my voice and remember it. Now, it may be that you may hear my voice, shouting at you to bloody stop. What do we do???”
“We keep going and do not stop!” Twilight yelled, in union with her friends.
“What? No!” The guard laughed. “Then you'd better well stop. Trust me, I've been doing it for years.”
“But why-”
“No time!” The guard cried, as he broke into a determined grin. “Step it up! Let's go! I'll be with you all the way! Good luck, ladies! Go! Go! Go! And you especially, pretty purple! You're a lil' pudgy, but don't you dare stop anyway! Go! Run!!!”
Pudgy? Twilight thought, half offended as she cantered up to the surface of the barrier. There was no time for a confrontation, however, as all five of her friends bore down behind her, running full tilt, their luggage clattering on wagons behind them. Up close, the surface was not silvery as it first appeared, but rather like a thick, nearly opaque mist. Nothing else for it! she decided and hurtled through.
“Raaaarghh!!!”
The shock hit her like a thunderbolt. Twilight yelped as the sensation, at once both searing hot and cold flooded through her body like hot chocolate and naphtha. Her vision swam and her eyes watered, as she blinked in confusion. The world seemed to press down on her; great crushing weights that threatened to send her sprawling to the ground like a rag doll. Instinctively she drew upon her magic, focusing upon her horn, but to her horror, nothing came. Behind her, she heard someone scream, and she felt her heart leap up to her mouth.Fluttershy? Rarity? Pinkie? Rainbow? Applejack? Her mind wailed. What's happening? Where's the guard?
“Let me go!” she cried, struggling weakly against the crushing weight. “I'm not supposed to stop! I've gotta' find my friends!” With the last of her strength, she drew back a hoof and struck. A weak, desperate last stand – her magic had failed, but her blow connected, hoof against flesh and-
“Woah, there, Miss Sparkle, “ someone said. A deep baritone voice, that seemed right next to her. “Calm down now! You'll be all right, you'll be all right.”
Twilight opened her eyes, her breath running ragged and her body, aching all over. She gasped for air as she looked wildly around her and found herself looking into an unfamiliar sky. Seemingly endless and adorned with wispy white things that seemed too intangible to be clouds. In contrast, the wind that howled around her had a bone chilling weight to it, carrying a scent of salt too strong to possibly be salt. It was only then that she realized that she was surrounded by worried faces.
“I'm so so so so sorry!” Fluttershy wailed, practically tearing up. “I saw you collapse and I screamed, but then you started struggling and...and...”
“Wow,” Rainbow Dash said, trembling. “And I thought I had it bad. Um, I mean... er. I was gonna' do something but I couldn't! My wings felt so, heavy! And I thought that I was gonna' fall over or something, and then, Fluttershy starts yelling and....er... are you alright?”
“Dang it, Twi.” Applejack whispered. “Ah' was right up next to ya, and well, everything was so darn hazy and ah' couldn't bear to move to catch ya'! Me! An Apple! All tuckered out jus' from steppin' through a fancy door!”
“I must apologize, Twilight, darling.” Rarity said as she pushed up between Applejack and Rainbow Dash. “I tried to catch you, I did, but...”
“Nothing, right?” Twilight whispered hoarsely. “There's no magic here...ha ha ha... it's really true.”
“Well, not exactly, Twilight, darling,” Rarity replied, worry worn into her face. “There was a, well, trickle... but not really enough for me to do much of any good.”
“Luckily,” Pinkie interjected, “Richie was there to help you!” She alone looked none the worse for wear, instead beaming approvingly towards the pony who had rushed to her side. “He caught you when you tumbled right over there and sent that guard guy to pick up a first aid kit from the post! But you're all awake now, yay!”
“Richie?” Twilight slurred, as she turned to get a closer look at her benefactor. “Richie Who?” Strong, bold features, and dark brown mane with silver at the temples filled her eyes, a familiar, distinguished figure, dressed in a well pressed suit. Mr Filthy Rich of Ponyville stood, his face ashen and lined with worry.
“Well, Miss Sparkle,” he said, his voice gruff and unsure. “That's not something you feel everyday, eh? Everyone remembers their first time here – it hits you harder than a train.”
“Well, hello Mr Filthy?” Twilight mumbled, abashed and dizzy still. Flithy Rich cringed ever so slightly. “ Er... sorry” she remembered the older stallion's eccentricities and looked skywards in embarrassment. “What's that big sun thingy that looks a like a sun, but can't possibly be a sun because its way too big?” Twilight asked, her voice slurring as she tried to stand.
“Why, Miss Sparkle,” Filthy Rich said huffily, as he offered his hoof to help her up. “That's the sun of course. Or more accurately, that is their sun.”
“Oh.” Twilight wheezed, and felt her legs promptly give out beneath her once more.
The last things she remembered were the cries of alarm from her friends, and the glimmers of worried faces that filled her vision. Strange blurry creatures too tall and lanky to be ponies hoisted her body onto someone's strong back and before she could even feel terrified, she was carried away, with the whispers and gossip of the assembled crowd fading into the background.
“So that's the Twilight Sparkle?” Once voice in particular stood out amongst the rest, female, yet ostentatiously gruff and gravelly. “I'm not at all impressed...”
Who, or for what purpose, Twilight could not tell. Unconsciousness overtook her.
Twilight Sparkle awoke to the sight of an unfamiliar ceiling, pale beige white expanse of plasterboard that seemed almost luminescent in the sunlight that streamed in through the blinds. Windows lined one end of the room, and Twilight felt her breath get caught in her throat when she realized that the reddish orange glow of the sun upon the badlands had gone. Instead the light was paler, bluish even, similar to the shimmer of a sunbeam on the facets of Rarity'sapphires. And it was cold, oh so cold. Twilight huddled deeper into her blankets.
Only thirst drew her out of her warm little cocoon. Twilight coughed softly as she emerged, having decided that her mouth was dry enough to warrant movement. It felt like it had been scrubbed out with sand. Out off the corner of her eye, she spotted a clear pitcher of water and a glass that had been set besides it and concentrated, drawing upon her magic and surrounding the pitcher in her telekinetic grip – or that would have been the case, had she been back in Equestria. The pitcher remained unmoved, ostentatiously mocking her failure.
Oh right. No magic. Twilight grumbled as she wriggled across the bed like a caterpillar. And it was a big bed too, definitely not pony sized, and it took her quite a bit of wriggling to reach its edge where she teetered over like a stack of poorly organized books. “Eurgh,” she reached across the divide with all her might, stretching and stretching to obtain her prize. Further and further over the edge she went until the clink of glass against her hoof told her that she had it.
But to her utmost surprise, the glass surface slipped away from her hoof. Puzzled, Twilight tried again, she gingerly extended her hoof and pressed it against the glass surface, but the pitcher was adamant; no adhesion occurred and the water remained where it was. She tried once again, this time more forcefully, but all she achieved was jostling the pitcher to very edge of the little table.
“Oh, come on!” she cried, as she withdrew from her terrible challenge. “What must a mare do to get a drink around here?”
“Oh come on!” some one else's voice echoed, and Twilight jumped. She had assumed that she had been alone in the the medical ward. It was a filly's voice, the high pitched shriek of someone younger, but nonetheless, a very grumpy one. “Can't you keep it down? I 'm sick! I've gotta' rest! Doesn't the high n' mighty Sparkle know how to take a drink of water without making a huge fuss about it?”
“Well, excuse me then,” Twilight said, as she rolled her eyes.She looked across to the neighbouring bed and sure enough, there was a bundle of blankets, piled up upon it. It moved ever so slightly and abruptly, it sat up and turned to face her. Something was emerging from within.
“Do I even know you?” Twilight asked.
“Why, yes. Yes you do.” The voice replied haughtily. With a rustle of fabric, some of the blankets fell away and a small, magenta coloured face wormed its way out from within the sanctuary of warmth. She was an Earth Pony, it seemed, and a pretty little thing too, though the effect was marred somewhat by the spiteful, angry expression on her face.
“You look familiar, but...” Twilight continued. The filly did look familiar, but she could not put a hoof on it. “Are you by any chance from Canterlot?”
“Hah! I wish.” The filly laughed bitterly. “I would pay million bits to live in Canterlot – there's proper culture and fashion there. “
“Er, no.”
“No? NO?” Twilight shrank back as the filly cried. “Are you implying that I'm not cultured enough for Canterlot???” The filly accused, glaring fiercely as any beast from the Everfree. “If I could, I would move right there, but-”
“No, no no no no!” Twilight wheedled. “You've got me all wrong! Of course, with that attitude, you'd fit right in, in Canterlot. But... with a million bits, you're gonna' get an small apartment at best – land prices in Canterlot are at a premium, you know....”
“-Daddy wants to stay in Ponyville!” The filly continued, giving no indication that she had heard Twilight speak at all. “Ponyville! What so nice about Ponyville anyway? Dumb hick town. They don't even have a proper chocolatier for heaven's sake!”
“You're from Ponyville?”
“What's the matter, Sparkle? Long term memory going away with age?”
“Hey! I resent that! I give! Who are you anyway?” Twilight conceded with a groan.
“It's me!You should know me!” The filly announced, smug as a cat in cream.
“Who?”
“Oh for heaven's sake.” The filly reached over to the end table, pulled open a drawer and retrieved an a small, elegant tiara, made of silver and studded with minute diamonds. With an imperious expression plastered upon her face, the filly placed the tiara upon her head and turned back. “There! You see now?”
“Oh! Ohhh! You're Diamond Tiara?” Twilight 's jaw dropped, as she stared at the filly. The familiar features fell into place and the familial resemblance to her father. “What are you doing here?”
“I don't answer to you, Sparkle,” Diamond Tiara replied with a flip of the mane. “But, if you really must know, Daddy and I are going to an exclusive spa-resort thing in the Alps.”
“Ah, I see,” Twilight commented, as she thought back. Filthy Rich. The older stallion had been there, when she had collapsed at the crossing. She could recall the worry in his eyes – the palpable worry and anxiety of all her friends and the outcry of the crowd that came to gawk at her spell of fainting. But she had not seen hide or hair of his, urgh, daughter.
“No, I meant, why are you here?” she repeated.
“What? Are you dumb or something, Sparkle? I'm on a stupid holiday.” the little filly said sulkily. “Daddy. And. I. Are. Going. To. An. Exclusive. Spa. In. The. Alps.”she repeated, very slowly. “Does. The. Princess. Have. To. Talk. To. You. Like. This. Too?”
“Now that is just rude.”
“Thank you. I try.” Diamond Tiara replied, as she put her little tiara away.
Twilight sighed and crushed the urge to cuff the younger mare over the head. The annoying little creature. “No, Diamond. I'm asking you, why are you here?” she waved a hoof, sweeping it about the infirmary.
Diamond Tiara stopped, and went beet red, whatever retort she was going to shoot back remanding unsaid. “I'm sick,” she replied huffily. “Very sick. Super-duper sick.”
“I... see...” Twilight said, not quite believing it. “But you were quite lively just now.”
“It... it comes and goes!” Diamond cried, hasty to answer. “You should see me when it gets bad.”
“How sad for you.”
“I know right?” Diamond Tiara nodded in agreement. “And all the fault of that stupid, stupid barrier. And this stupid, dirty, Earth.” She threw up her hooves in irritation. “It's so cold and gusty and their sea smells funny and the natives are big and dumb, like Snips on a hot day and they keep trying to force stupid pills down my throat and...” for a spilt second the younger filly's eye darted towards a small black glass bottle atop the shelf at her bed.
Dr Carriott's Universal Equine Medicine. Cures all ails. Twilight read. Equestria's singularly known non-magical elixir. Also known far and wide to young colts and fillies everywhere, as the black death. Many a young malinger had folded their hoof at the very sight of the dreaded black bottle, retrieved from the medicine cabinet like an ancient relic of war.
“You're actually drinking that stuff?” Twilight asked, apprehensive as she recalled its peculiar taste.
“Yeah, well,” Diamond Tiara snorted, contorting her face in disgust. “Everything else here is that stupid Human stuff, and I ain't touching any more of that sewage. At least Carriots's is drinkable...”
“Human stuff?” Twilight pressed, a sneaking suspicion dawning upon her. “What's wrong with it? It must be real bad if you like U.E.M”
“Everything's wrong with it! I'm not gonna' put anything called paracetamol anywhere near my mouth.” Diamond scoffed. “ What is paracetamol supposed to be anyway? Daddy and Dr Stables said that us ponies can take it jus' fine, but I'm not gonna' trust any medication that has words with five or more syllables in it. That many syllables is not natural.”
“Diamond,” Twilight said, as she peeked out the window. In the distance, “We just passed through a gate of old magic – older than Ponyville itself and crossed it right into another world. If paracetamol is the most unnatural thing you've seen all day, then you must be a very worldly filly indeed.”
“Hey! No sarcasm.” Diamond Tiara snapped. But she glared so hard that Twilight had stifle a giggle. “I do too see lots of weird stuff! For example, I saw Spike making goo goo eyes at Sweetie Belle's big sis last week.” Diamond admitted. “That was super weird too; he had flowers n' chocolates n' everything.”
“Ah, I remember that!” Twilight breathed, and thought for a moment. “Yeah, that definitely was pretty awkward, for everyone one involved.” She conceded. Sorry, Spike. But it was. “But what were you doing at Rarity's place at midnight?”
“I! Um!” Diamond Tiara went beet red. “It's none of your business, Sparkle,” she snapped. “Just checking on something for Daddy, that's all.”
“Oh.” Twilight stifled a knowing smile “That's very nice of you. And so late too! Whatever it was, must have been important.”
“Darn right it was,” Diamond snorted. “It is for Daddy's sake after all.”
“Did you like what you see?” Twilight asked earnestly. “He's a nice kid.”
“What? No! Ew!” Diamond cried. “He started singing at midnight and that creeped me out and then Sweetie Belle's sis came out with mud n' cucumbers on her face and tried to shoo him away and by then I'm really, really creeped out, and then half of Ponyville showed up – so I changed my mind about it and went back home.”
“Ah. I can see why” Twilight exhaled. It appears Spike's more popular than he thinks, she thought, inwardly delighted.
“And now you're creeping me out.” Diamond complained. “Don't you smile at me like that!”
“Oh, sorry, Diamond.” Twilight said airily. “It's nothing.”
“Yeah, yeah, go change the subject. Creep.”
“Oh, yes, lets.” Twilight agreed and made a sudden grab for the bottle of Carriot's Elixir. She wasn't quite able to grip it with her hoof, but she did hook in in the bend of her fore leg and dragged it over, ignoring the cries of protest from the filly.
“Aha! It isn't even open, the seal is intact. You're a malingerer, Diamond!” Twilight said, as she nudged the bottle across the table and back towards Diamond Tiara.
“Am not!” Diamond retorted, leaping ahoof, ready for a confrontation.
“You're awfully lively for a sick pony.”
“AM NOT!” Diamond cried, leaping off her perch on the bed. She caught her self moments after, guilty faced. Twilight just stared. “Fine! I'm not really that sick,” she admitted finally, “but it's just that I don't wanna' got so some muddy country I've never even heard off and I don't wanna' go to some smelly spa run by some dumb, dirty Alpacas. I wanna' go to Canterlot, or to Manehattan! Somewhere civilized!”
“Diamond, that's really selfish of you.” Twilight chided.
“The hay I am! You're not my mother!” Diamond Tiara seethed. “I do think about Daddy all the time! Mum's not around any more so it is my job to take care of him. He should be in Canterlot where he belongs and not out here on some dirty island, surrounded by stupid two-leg barbarians and fashion victims!”
The outburst was sudden and Twilight found herself suddenly feeling sorry for the filly. “But pretending to be sick won't solve anything.” she said, shaking her head. “Why don't you just tell your father?”
“Because,” the filly hesitated, for a brief moment vulnerable. “Because...I dunno'. Daddy just won't stop talking about the Alps – and Germany, which sounds really unhygienic, and then he gets all misty eyed and nostalgic and lonely and its really really weird and...” her voice petered out and she just looked miserable.
“Twilight,” the filly said, quiet for the first time in a while. “I think...”
Twilight watched as Diamond's jaw worked soundlessly, trying to find the words to say. And then there was a sound of a door crashing open, of wood smashing against wood, followed by the sound of footsteps. Diamond Tiara fell silent at once, snapping her jaw shut. She looked angry with herself. “Whatever. It's none of your business anyway, Sparkle,” the filly mouthed.
But Twilight barely heard that. Instead, she concentrated on the intruders. And their footsteps. One was the standard clip clop of four hooves striking against the timber floor, and the other, the steady gait of something walking on two feet. Human Twilight breathed, as she exchanged significant looks with Diamond.
“Are we alone?” A rough, yet female voice spoke, seemingly carried in through a small ventilation duct in the wall to the next ward. Twilight looked up at it, then back to Diamond and back. They exchanged glances and clambered up onto the side table, both of them rearing up onto their hind legs to peek through. Diamond was a too short and made do with perching on Twilight's back herself.
Contenting herself with an evil glare towards the offending filly, Twilight peered through the duct. Thankfully for her, it was nothing more than a shallow vent that connected the two wards, which gave her a fairly good view of the room and its occupants.
“You shouldn't have said that, Professor; not in that crowd.” Another voice, this one ostentatiously male spoke, cutting through the calm of the ward like a peal of thunder. “You lot of ponies are amiable folks, but you were really pushing your luck back there.” Twilight craned her neck forward, trying to see, but the speaker remained unseen – save for a pair of legs, clad in some blue fabric that Twilight had not seen before.
“Human.” she whispered.
“Don't ignore my question,” the female voice snapped. “Are we alone?” There, a middle aged Earth Pony stood. Her mane was straw coloured, like wheat in the sun, but the rest of her was so strikingly ordinary and plain looking that Twilight felt an odd sense of recognition. The bruising around one eye only exaggerated that plainness into ugliness. She was clothed, a body obscuring lab coat which covered her body, flanks and legs in thick white fabric, swishing as she paced the room.
“Yes, professor.” the male sighed. “The ward is empty as you can plainly see... now, where was I? Oh yes. Why did you provoke them, Professor? The whole point of coming back here was to gather support – to show the Order of the Golden Horn that we mean them no harm. You may not see it this way, but their opinion does affect us. All you did was get a black eye for nothing.”
The mare paced angrily. “Did Star Swirl and his apprentice care what the Idiot King thought of them?” She said, as her hooves beat a drumbeat into the floorboards. “No they did not! Now Star Swirl and Clover are remembered throughout the ages while the dullest historians struggle to remember who Princess Platinum's simpleton of a father was.”
“Professor...”
“The so called Order? They're sheep, to be herded about at the pleasure of their betters. The Order of the Golden Horn is nothing more than a kindergarten of foals, and their self proclaimed Grandmasters in Canterlot are not much better. Keepers of the Secrets of the Old Kingdom, are they? Hah! They last magician they sponsored cheeked the princess and ran away to hide in a mirror. Some secret.”
“Come on now, Professor,” the male said, his tone soothing. Twilight breathed, looking on as a hand was placed upon the mare's shoulders. “It's partly your fault anyhow – don't look at me like that, it's true. When Professor Wang gave the green light for you to fly into Hippocampus, he specifically mentioned that you were not to provoke your detractors. And if you hadn't been so stubborn, we could have appealed to the Princesses for protection and then we could have gone straight to Canterlot to get what you need. Instead, here we are squatting on their doorstep like beggars.”
“Enough!” The mare cried, her voice raspy. She turned to glare at the unseen human.“I've repeated myself far too many times. I will return to Canterlot victorious, or not at all.”
“Victorious or not at all?” The male said, as he barked a short laugh. “You and your pride. You speak as if you wish to make war on Canterlot. Professor, you've been with us for a decade, but do you know what the Bellerophon Institute stands for?”
“Yes. You wish to exploit Equestria for your own ends.” The mare said. “I acknowledge that, and I have decided that I could care less about them. Exploit away! Capitalism, Ho!”
“Professor,” the male sighed. “Now you're just being bitter again. The Institute is here to promote cooperation between Humanity and Equestria. There is so much we can learn from one another.”
“Really? It's hard tell sometimes.” The mare said, without a hint of humour. “It doesn't matter. I just want to finish this. If only to see the look on Celestia's face. To see the looks on all their faces when I achieve the impossible. When we achieve the impossible, and topple the comfortable little world they've surrounded themselves with.”
“Come on, there's no need for that.” The man said. Sometimes, I think you forget that your exile is self-imposed, and that not everyone is your enemy. You have supporters in Earth and in Equestria both, all hoping to see our research come to fruition.
“And a million ponies who want to see me fail, and fade into history, a laughingstock. There she goes! The deluded mare who thought she could-”
“Professor,” the male interrupted, his tone a deadly calm. “That won't happen. You know it. I know it. The prototypes work. There's no need for such negativity.”
“Yeah, yeah,” the mare grumbled, agitatedly. “Now, get out. I need some privacy.”
“How bad is it?” The male voice asked. Concern evident in his tone. “ Is it...”
“It's bad. Equestria doesn't agree with me.” The mare winced. “I'm outside its borders, but the magic seeps out still – the Lenz field is still detectable as far as Shanghai.”
“What's a lenz field?” Diamond Tiara whispered, as she shifted around on Twilight's back.
“I dunno', I don't think I've heard of it before.” Twilight replied softly. “Now shush, I don't want a confrontation with them.”
“Do you, need some help?” the man asked.
“No. Now sod off.”
“Are you sure, Professor?”
“For the thousandth time, yes. Do I have to throw you out myself?”
The was a brief silence and then the man spoke once more. “You should go back and ask that Princess of yours to help you. If she's as benevolent as they say she is...”
“No.” The mare replied, bitterly. “I will not go crawling back to kiss her hooves and beg for her pardon. I chose my own destiny and I will live with the consequences of my actions. I will not be pitied.”
“Professor, you're like family to me – to us. We don't want to see you like this. Go to the Princess; if anything else, it'll let you concentrate on you work.”
The mare stopped and stared away, out the window. “When I was younger, I had the opportunity to meet the Princess face to face. I asked her a question, demanded the truth.”
“And?”
The mare laughed, resentful. “She never answered me, so I came up with my own answers.”
There was a pregnant pause, and for a moment, all Twilight could hear was her own breathing.
“I choose my own destiny. I live by the consequences of my choices.”
“I see,” the male said, his tone flat. “ Well then, Professor, if you don't need anything else, then I'll be heading off. The flight's at ten sharp tonight, and I'm sure I can find a bar somewhere that serves something stronger than cider. Maybe I'll stop by the new museum in down town Hippocampus – there's an exhibit on Alexander the Great going on, limited time. Might be worth a look. ”
“Yeah, yeah. Go on. Sod off then.”
“Goodbye Professor.” There was a click of the door and the mare was left alone. She looked about furtively and unclothed herself, her hooves working quickly and precisely as buttons were undone, and the coat fell to the ground with a dry rustle.
Twilight stared. The mare's cream coated body was somewhat pudgy though still robust enough for an Earth Pony. Though there appeared to be burns of some sort that streaked her sides. There, the hair grew sparsely around reddened flesh; as if someone had dashed caustic chemicals upon her flanks. And as she turned to deposit a pair of thick spectacles down upon a side table, Twilight caught a glimpse of her cutie mark.
Or what was left of it.
Twilight's eyes widened and she felt a shiver run down her spine as she huddled against the duct. She felt Diamond Tiara's hooves dig into her back as she filly stiffened, and the warm exhalation of breath on her neck as the filly let out a small gasp.
Upon the unsuspecting pony's flank was an angry mass of scar tissue and random tones and colours, right where her cute mark should have been. The patch was livid, and seemed to shift and twist even as the pony trotted around the room, applying salves and ointments to her various afflictions. All of them were horrible to see, but none were as bad as the mark-scar. Twilight likened it to a painting that had been doused in thinner and smeared maliciously across the canvas.
“Ewwwwww! Ew! Ew!” Diamond Tiara whispered, her hooves stuffed into her mouth in horror. “What is that?”
“I dunno' Diamond.” Twilight shivered. “I can't tell you anything.” But she knew, deep within that it was something unnatural. And then, came the clip-clop of hooves down the hall.
“HELLO TWILIGHT! ALL FEELING BETTER??” Before Twilight could brace herself, the door crashed open and Pinkie Pie hurled herself in, with the other four of her friends trailing closely behind. They met with the mare and suddenly everything simply stopped.
The mare froze, her eyes wide. She dropped the tube of ointment she had held in her jaw as it hung open. Her pupils flickered from the intruders and toward the mark-scar, and the single mirror on the wall and there she stood, trembling.
“Oh my, sorry! Rarity exclaimed. “We did not mean to intrude-”
“OUT!” The mare screamed, her eyes as livid as her scars, brimming with hatred and shame. “GET OUT!” She paced about, staring at each of the ponies in turn, looking this way and that, as if a wild animal cornered, her face contorted into a rictus of a snarl, ignorant of all else. The side table was knocked over, sending bottles of ointment to the ground. Her spectacles clattered to the ground, forgotten. But all Twilight's friends could do was stand there, frozen, shocked and unmoving even as a brief flicker of horrified recognition appeared upon the mare's bruised face.
“YOU!” She cried, right up in Fluttershy's face.
“YOU!” She pointed a hoof at Rarity.
“YOU! YOU! YOU!” She wheeled wildly, her jaw agape like a rabid thing. “SO, IS THIS YOUR ANSWER, CELESTIA?” With a hellish cry, the mare retrieved her coat in her teeth, and charged out the door, crushing her own spectacles in her wake. And then, Twilights friends were left alone.
“Oops?” Pinkie said, trembling, her eyes wide and her hair standing on end. “Wrong room?”
The others deigned to reply.
Twilight didn't know the reason, but she simply could not bear to call to her friends.
“Pinkie, girls.” Twilight began thoughtfully. “Just how do you get things to stick to your hooves anyway?” She asked as she eyed her ice cream soda thoughtfully. “Is there some special trick to it, or am I just thinking too hard and bunging it up?”
Following their shocking encounter with an obviously unstable mare at Doctor Stable's clinic, they had quickly decided that ice cream and chit chat was in order, to sooth their frazzled nerves if anything else. And so, they had found their way to a little desserts parlour overlooking just off the main street. A rustic place run by an elderly Earth Pony couple, that had been only too happy to give them the best seats in the house; six plump cushions at an old mahogany table; a location from which they had a view of the imposing Barrier they had passed through.
“Why, it's the same as always, I guess?” Pinkie replied, between big swallows of an triple large sundae with fudge and almonds and wafers and fudge. “See?” She demonstrated by hoofing her dessert spoon up to eye level. “Easy-peasy lemon squeezy.”
“Pinkie, dear.” Rarity interrupted, levelling a critical eye at the pink mare. “That's because your spoon's been glued to your hoof with fudge. Goodness me, what a mess.” She sniffed. “The rest of us are are having some difficulty with the cutlery.” As if to emphasize her point, her spoon slipped from her hoof, and clattered upon the table, finishing in a small bowl of raspberry coulis. “This lack of magic is inconvenient, no.”
“Speak fer yer'self, Rarity.” A.J said, as she wolfed down an apple cobbler with ice cream. “Ah'm not havin' much of a problem – sure it's a little more wobbly than usual, but...”
“Yeah, too bad you don't have wings, Twi,” Rainbow Dash piped up. Hers was wedged in a mass of feathers, some of which were moulting into her bowl, seven colours of ice cream half consumed. “They're super useful, and that is why, pegasi are the best-est.”
“I really couldn't say...” Fluttershy whispered, obviously distracted. She stared at her bowl of dessert thoughtfully, as if some sneaking suspicion was dawning upon her. “Gelatine,” she mouthed. “Was this from seaweed, or... oh my.”
“Jeez, Fluttershy,” Rainbow cried. “I know your thing is staring and all, but you're not supposed to stare at crème' caramel – just eat it.”
“Not until I'm sure.”
“Of what?”
“So, there's no easy answer, huh?” Twilight sighed, leaning back from the bickering.
“Eenope,” came the collective reply.
Twilight sighed and prodded her spoon glumly. Even Diamond Tiara, that exasperating filly, didn't seem to have had a problem sticking things to her hooves.
Said filly however, was not with them. She had been left stewing in the ward, awaiting the arrival of her father. And serves her just right, Twilight thought, with some measure of vindictive satisfaction. She's trapped herself with her own lie. After all, a filly who was too ill to leave the sickbed, could not, by definition, leave for ice cream and chit chat.
In any case, the spoilt little filly would not be alone for too long. If Twilight knew Filthy Rich at all, she knew that the doting father would drop everything at the very first sign of danger and be galloping off in a flash, speeding to his little princess's side like a rugged, wind tousled knight straight out of Cadance's romance novels.
And so, they had left Diamond Tiara alone, while managing to maintain reasonably clear consciences. And sure enough, Filthy Rich had rocketed right past them just as they hit Hippocampus's main street, looking wind tousled and dashingly rugged as he galloped towards the clinic as if the shade of dread Grogar himself were snapping at his heels. Everything would be all right. Twilight smiled.
“So, anyway” Twilight began, as she abandoned her dessert. “Filthy Rich, huh. I didn't expect him to come running out past us like that.”
“Why yes, yes of course. Dear Mr Rich is always there for his daughter,” Rarity said, her eyes distant and misty as she placed her spoon down in her half empty bowl of peach gelato – a human delicacy of some sort. “He's such a perfect gentleman, but that Diamond Tiara of his - such a spiteful little creature! I don't know why, but that demented little filly seems to have something against poor Sweetie Belle.”
“Filthy's alright in mah' books.” A.J agreed with a nod. “He's always been honest with us Apples, but that girl of his just ain't right!” She said as she stirred the melting slurry of her cobbler agitatedly. “She's always been givin' Applebloom a hard time. And ah' hear bad, bad things about her from Cheerilee” This was received with a flurry of nods and shaking heads.
But,” she continued , her expression softened somewhat, taking an almost wistful appearance. “Ah' suppose, it's hard goin', raisin' a kid without a mother. Mrs Rich was always such a nice lady even if she was one of em' fancy Canterlot ponies. If only she were still around, maybe Diamond Tiara would be a lil' sweeter.”
“She just needs a spankin'. A good spankin'.” Rainbow Dash announced, as she pushed her empty bowl aside, leaving a melted trail of rainbow on the table. “Spare the rod, spoil the cheese, or something like that.”
“Child, dear. Spare the rod, spoil the child.” Rarity corrected, tapping a hoof agitatedly. “And while I may not agree with 'spanking' per say, we shouldn't allow Diamond Tiara to run amok. What about your little friend, Scootaloo, was it? Aren't you worried about her?”
“Ah, Scoots? She's the toughest filly in Ponyville. She can take anything Diamond Brat can dish out and then some.”
“That's not the point, Rainbow.” Rarity sighed. “Anyway, once we get back from this trip, I'm thinking that one of us might have a talk with Filthy Rich, and find a way to take Diamond Tiara in hoof. Twilight, dear, what say you to that?”
“Sounds good, I guess,” Twilight agreed hesitantly. “But why me?”
“That's because you don't have a dear little sister who's being bullied.” Rarity explained, as she placed a hoof on her shoulder. “Filthy Rich might claim bias on my part if I complain – and same with Applejack and Rainbow Dash, while you probably wouldn't have that problem. In case you didn't know Twilight, your word carries quite a bit weight in Ponyville.”
“Yeah, Twilight. Being the Princess's pet egghead does have perks, don'tcha think?” Rainbow Dash agreed, a silly grin adorning her features. “Anyhow, you wouldn't be doing anything wrong, would you?”
“Yeah, but I don't like drawing attention to that...” Twilight said, as she shook her head. “And the Princess would be disappointed in me if I start throwing my weight around. Maybe Fluttershy, or Pinkie could...”
“I'm thinking,” Pinkie spoke softly, but with an evil grin on her face. She set both her fore hooves upon her table and asked a single, pregnant question. “What if we matchmake Richie and he remarries!”
“What?”
“Ooooh,” Rainbow crowed, a rancorous grin splitting her face from ear to ear “Looks like Pinkie likes older stallions. When is the foal commin' along?”
“What? Me? Hee hee, nooooo! It's not like that!” Pinkie giggled pinker than ever, as she matched Rainbow, grin for grin. “ Just listen to me, girls. What if Richie marries, I dunno', Twilight!”
“Pinkie, no” Twilight warned.
Alright! Alright! How about... maybe Ms. Harshwhinny! Yes, that Harshwhinny!”
They stared.
“Oh come on, girls!” Pinkie pleaded, her eyes darting back and forth between her friends. “You've got to know which one I'm talking about. She's an Earth Pony games inspector. Also has a super-duper grumpy-grouchy-face. Hmm, sounds hoarse all the time too. And she's stuffier than a Canterlot Musician. Oh come on!”
“Oh yes, I remember Harshwhinny.” Twilight sighed. She recalled that mare. A pantheon's worth of primness and professionalism packed into a petite pony.
“Oh, I'm not one for romance,” Fluttershy said thoughtfully, blushing at the mere thought of it. “But I suppose if anyone can set Diamond Tiara straight...”
“Girls! Girls!” Pinkie grinned. “Come on! Just imagine this.” She took a deep breath and burst into a horribly mutilated exaggeration of a Trottingham accent.
“Diamond! Dazzle! Tiara!” she caterwauled.“If I see you being a r-r-r-aspscallion one more time, I shall spank your r-r-rump! To you r-r-room and no dinner tonight! R-r-richie, my dear, we simply must have a talk about our daughter! Tadah!”
Pinkie reared and took a bow. There was a brief, if respectful silence, and then they all burst into peals of laughter.
“Darn it, Pinkie. Now've you done gone put some strange notion inta' my head! And ah' can't get it out!” A.J coughed, choking back giggles, her cobbler forgotten.
“That Harshwhinny lady, she's all right as a pony, ah' mean, but, by Granny Smith's saggy hip, if she were my mother... Ya'll could say goodbye to Applejack, folks! This mare's gonna' be movin' to Manehattan!!!”
“Um, isn't that kinda' mean, Applejack?” Fluttershy protested, between tiny giggles. “She wasn't really all that bad.”
Rainbow Dash laughed, and banged a hoof on the table. “Speak for yourself, Fluttershy! I've known her since I was a filly and she is definitely that bad! Good job with the r-r-right accent, Pinkie.”
“Still,” Rarity giggled excitedly. “A collision between Diamond Tiara and Miss Harshwhinny would be something spectacular indeed! I would pay a thousand bits for a front seat at the ring of honour to see that particular fight; the match of the century!”
“Implying it would be a fair fight,” Twilight snorted, nodding along to the sounds of rowdy, or in Fluttershy's case, demure, laughter, and the clip clop of hooves pounding upon the table. They made such a din that the proprietress and their fellow guests turned to stare – a sunny yellow mare even shuffling over to listen in.
“True, but any sympathy that the onlookers would ordinarily feel for a child pitted against a full grown pony would be negated by the simple fact that the filly in question is, well, Diamond Tiara.” Rarity explained, a mischievously coy little smile on her face, one which Twilight returned.
“Oh! Hello! Excuse me,” a bright cheery voice said, cutting into the conversation.
Twilight turned, and sure enough there was a a visitor along side their table. It was their eavesdropper, a relatively youthful looking Earth Pony mare who smiled cheerily like a sunrise. She had shimmering coat, the colour of wheat in the sun, and her mane was a deep, evening orange. To round out her appearance, she was clad in a light rose pink blouse that covered all the way down her hind legs. Twilight caught Rarity nodding appreciatively.
“Oh my! Could you six be the Elements of Harmony?” She asked, as she gazed inquisitively at each of them in turn.
“Um, yes?” Twilight began. “ Can we help you?”
“Oh yes, you can help me indeed. I'm from the Canterlot Foal Protection Agency, ” the mare smiled, serene like a quiet evening. “And I couldn't help but overhear the tail end of your conversation. I'd say we need to have a little chat. ”
Twilight stopped dead at once, as did A.J and Rarity beside her. Her breath stuck in her very throat as the mare approached, calm and not indigent as she expected, which made it worse, somehow. And Rainbow and Fluttershy and Pinkie were no better.
Each and every one of them were staring at the interloper as if she had grown mandibles and unmasked herself as a changeling. Twilight could have heard a feather hit the ground in the resulting silence, as her friends sat, their faces frozen in various shades of puce. The Earth Pony mare stopped and her smile gave way to a stern, authoritative countenance; one that was reminiscent of Princess Celestia, a moment before a royal scolding. Twilight cowered instinctively, and bowed her head to await a dressing down.
Which did not come.
“Oh! Oh, oh my!” A amused chuckle, like the chiming of bells filled the room, as the mare laughed demurely, a hoof raised to cover her mouth. “Oh, you should have seen all your faces. It's not every day someone gets to flummox Elements of Harmony.”
“Huh? What?” Twilight spluttered.
“Oh, stop it! Please be at ease.” The mare looked at each of them in turn. There's no need to worry! I'm not from the CFPA at all! It's just my little joke. Honestly!”
“Little joke?” Rarity sniffed. “Little joke??? That was simply unkind.”
“Yeah, Miss” A.J agreed with a frown. “If this is ya' idea of a lil' jest, then you might have a screw loose somewhere.”
“Yeah, lady,” Pinkie cried, distressed. “You're mean! CFPA jokes aren't funny! Not one bit!”
The mare leaned over, and if she was taken aback, she gave no sign. Instead, she placed a comforting hoof upon their shoulders in turn. “Oh oh no no no, my dears. It's just my little joke. There's no need to overreact... I apologise....”
“Now, is that all you had to say?” Twilight asked, a font of irritation rising up within her. “Or is there any point to this?”
“Oh! Oh yes! I wanted to talk to you.” the mare smiled as she turned back to face Twilight with a knowing look. “I'm just here to talk to an old school mate of mine. I'm Golden Branch, dear Twilight Sparkle and, oh, hmmm, what was that little phrase again... oh! Long time no see, was it?”
“A school mate, Golden Branch?.” Twilight accused, her voice tight as she felt the mare's inquisitive eyes boring down on her, azure like a blue morning sky. “I don't know you, do I?”
“Oh! Well, it is understandable, it has been a long, long time indeed.” the mare said, smiling pleasantly despite her less than warm reception. “But I do know you; Twilight Sparkle of First year, Clover Class, row three, desk six. We're schoolmates, you and I, even if it was only for six months, for your foundation studies at the Academy, before the Princess took you directly under her wing.”
“Really?”
“Oh yes indeed. I was in the fourth Year, Puddinghead Class, Row six, desk thirteen. Also, part time, cafeteria-lady. I served you lunch on several occasions.”
“But aren't you an Earth Pony?” Twilight asked, bluntly. She took a second confirmatory look at the mare's forehead - some mane styles did obscure a horn, but...nope, nothing.“Princess Celestia's Academy was for unicorns. It's a school for magic.” She emphasised.
For the first time, since Twilight had seen the mare, a brief, flicker of irritation appeared on Golden Branch's pale wheaten face. “Well yes, “ she huffed. “I am a mere an Earth Pony, that is certainly true, but that doesn't mean the study of magic is beyond me”
There was a brief and uncomfortable silence and Twilight wished she had just kept her fat mouth shut. Rarity leaned over, a worried expression on her face. “Twilight, dear. Let's not press the issue, it seems to be a sore spot for her...”
“Puddinghead class is completely theory based. Magical theory, of course” Golden Branch continued, a slurry of words that tumbled forth by rote. Twilight imagined that she had spoken these same words countless times before and a spark of guilt rose up within her.
“I do study magic - research, gathering data, cryptography; semiotics in particular. It's nowhere near as glamorous as what you do, dear Twilight Sparkle, but I like to think that it helps advance the field.. Not everyone is as fortunate as you, Twilight Sparkle. To be so singularly blessed with such an affinity for magic that an entire generation of magicians was put to shame. ”
“I... see.” Twilight mumbled half-heartedly. “Um, I wasn't insinuating anything?”
“No. Of course you didn't,” Golden Branch blinked and seemed to catch herself. She stopped her spiel and then laughed, shaking her head and her ire along with it, as if she hadn't lost her composure the first place. “I'm so, so sorry. I over reacted.”
“Erm, yes, we were rather snippy to each other.” Twilight admitted, with both Rarity and A.J prodding her at the sides. Across the table, Rainbow and Fluttershy and Pinkie nodded on in agreement. “Let's start afresh shall we?”
“Oh! Why, that would be very nice indeed.” Golden Branch nodded amicably. “I'd rather like to think that I have more productive things to do with my time than to feel offended, oh goodness me no. I tell you what; I'll foot the bill as token of my apology.”
The result was immediate. The table was thrown into a tittering mess as Golden Branch serenely lifted a dainty hoof, flagging the waitress pony over.
“Oh, no no dear, let me.” Rarity protested, as she tugged gently on the mare's fore hoof. “You don't feel obligated to pay for snacks just because of a few snide remarks.”
“Yeah, lady,” A.J added her two cents. “Ah' can't let ya' do that.”
“Oh, I simply couldn't let you do that,” Fluttershy added her two bits worth, as she piled in.
Golden Branch, looked at each of them and nodded. “Alright then,” she said. “May I suggest something else then?”
“Look,” Twilight replied, still feeling a little bad. “What do you have in mind?”
“Oh, nothing special,” Golden Branch tittered innocently. “Why don't I show you around town instead, then? Hippocampus isn't anything special, compared to Canterlot, or New York, but it's a nice little place. It's the least I could do for you.”
“Well, the flight isn't until ten tonight,” Rarity reminded her. “Maybe taking a little tour of the place wouldn't be such a bad idea.”
“There is a pet store down the main street.” Fluttershy whispered. “I wouldn’t buy anything of course, but I am just ever so, um, curious about what animals are like, out here...”
Twilight sighed. “We'll accept. Thank you, Golden Branch.”
Golden Branch reacted well, perhaps overly much so. Twilight blinked in surprise as the mare pranced in excitement. “Oh! How wonderful.” She exclaimed gaily, grinning to reveal neat white teeth. “It would be my utmost pleasure! I'll meet all of you outside in a minute then.” And with that, she trotted right out the door.
“Go on Twilight,” Rarity said, as she reached into a saddle bag for her purse of bits. “I'll get the bill and see you in a moment.”
Twilight nodded, not quite sure about the whole affair, but going along with it anyway. She stood and headed for the door, mouthing a half-hearted farewell to the waitress as she left, her friends, sans Rarity filing out along, right behind her.
Golden Branch stood alone, just across the little cobblestone path where a long row of planters lined the roadway overlooking the bay. The sunlight shone gently, giving her already wheaten coat an almost shimmering quality to it. In the distance, a massive ship of iron sailed, an impossible juggernaut of metal upon the calm water, slowly but steadily making its way towards the harbour in the distance.
“Port Luna.” Golden Branch said, gazing into the distance as they approached. “They completed its just three months after the Nightmare Moon incident, just about two years ago. I'd dare say no harbour in Equestria is the equal of this one – at least not for a few more decades.”
Twilight looked on, as the cold breeze swept through her mane. Port Luna was not what she had expected. In the place of familiar dockworker ponies and rope and pulley lifts, or trained unicorn cargo masters, there were vast machines, like metal dragons that threaded black metal cables through their structures. Ponies, like ants in comparison, scurried around, tending to the behemoths.
Golden Branch notice her staring. She waved a single hoof, sweeping the horizon ahead, as she trotted along down the path towards the shore. “They have to use those machines because there's insufficient magic to get anything done” She proclaimed. “Can you feel it? How different it is?”
“I don't feel anything.” Twilight admitted. She realized she had been unconsciously probing with her horn, fruitlessly drawing upon something that wasn't there. “It was a little uncomfortable at first, but I think I'm used to it by now.” She lied as she conscientiously avoided any mention her little episode at the barrier. In truth, her horn just felt numb, allowing her to ignore the strangeness of it all and try to enjoy her holiday.
“Exactly!” Golden Branch said, as she trotted onwards steadily. “You don't, or rather, can't feel the ambient magic; not now at least. But, back in Equestria, I'd say that you could. You could feel, or perhaps even see it; an ephemeral currant swirling around you, like liquid silver!” She said breathlessly.
“Or at least that's how the unicorns from the university describe it.”
“Oooh! Ooooh!” Pinkie jumped at her chance, cutting in before Twilight could even speak. She bounced on the spot, heaving up a hoof like a school filly. “How do we Earth Ponies feel it?” she practically yelled, alarming a number of passer bys on the street.
Golden Branch looked over to the jumping mare, a drawn expression on her face. “Not much at all Pinkie Pie, my dear. Barely perceptible even. It's not for the likes of us I'm afraid. Perhaps nothing more than a little tingle in our hooves when we're on a particularly strong lay line, I suppose.” She shrugged non-committally, leaving Pinkie looking at her hooves in curious disappointment.
“And as for the Pegasi,” she continued, as she strolled over to Rainbow and Fluttershy and staring at their wings appreciative. “I am told that it feels like a stallion bucking you under the wings, and I meant that in the sexual context – please don't ask me how the Pegasi came up with that analogy.”
Twilight felt heat rushing to her cheeks as she turned away instinctively, catching a glimpse of Rarity emerging from the shop her ears perked at the sound of steamy gossip. Along side her, she heard A.J's good natured earth cackle and Fluttershy's demure “oh my...” And Rainbow Dash shot a lascivious grin to Pinkie, who giggled, blushing pinker than her usual pastel shade. Of course the Party Fiends would know. Twilight thought, embarrassment struggling with amusement within her.
“The humans.” Golden Branch continued, as she pressed on down the incline. “Feel nothing at all, or so they tell us – excuse me, sir.” She ducked aside as a human pedestrian strode past with a nod of acknowledgement.
“The university theorises that with the degree of magical non-presence they have, they could simply walk right through the strongest magical security system in Canterlot.”
But Twilight was barely listening. She gawked as the towering creature stepped past her and right over Pinkie, his long legs clearing the pink Earth Pony's back with room to spare.
“Pardon me, girls.” he acknowledged, his voice the low rumble of thunder and was right past their little group and around a corner before she could get a good look at him.
“A strange people, all things considered.” Golden Branch commented as she went. “Lots of strange customs. Their culture emphasises confrontation and aggressiveness more than us, that's for sure. “Oh! Look, over there!” she cried, as she pointed a hoof to a columned building further down the hill.
“It's open to the public, but it's hardly finished. One of my personal projects for cultural exchange; the Alexander the Great Exhibit. Armour, weapons, banners, paintings – and soon, the centrepiece bronze work. Might be worth a look, don't you think? Come on!”
The next several hours passed in a blur, as Twilight let herself be ushered around the city, from sight to sight. Golden Branch was right; the little harbour town was no Canterlot, and likely no New York either.Whatever New York is, it must be a fine city if it rivals Canterlot. Twilight thought.
They stopped at the local museum, despite Rainbow's numerous proclamations of boredom. It was supposed to be hosting a grand exhibit from some Human folk hero of antiquity; Alexander the Great, the local ponies called him.
There, Rainbow's reservations slipped away when she realized that that Alexander fellow had be a conqueror – and she lost herself in the exhibits of arms and armour. But the exhibit was yet incomplete. A large, metal sign outside the main entrance apologized for the delays in shipment of the exhibits; works of bronze; cutlery, a bell, shields and a bust of the legendary man himself.
Twilight soon tired of wandering about aisles of what seemed to be the same set of Old Pegasopolis Armour, but smithed for a human stature. She had been glad to leave for other, more relaxing sites.
Then, Pinkie Pie, on an impulse spending spree had bought a dearly overpriced camera at a tourist trap and so to humour her, they posed for photos at the seascape, and then, at a small monument to a local hero, Sterling Silver; some small time philanthropist or the other. And following that, they made funny faces at the base of other statues, strange, of tall, terrifying and yet dignified humans, out of place in a pony city. Zhang Ma, Charles Darwin and many other names that meant absolutely nothing to Twilight.
They browsed the wares of quaint little shop houses, their pony shopkeepers crying their wares ranging from bronze horseshoes to the strange baubles imported from Human lands. One wide eyed shopkeeper with an abacus cutie mark had waxed lyrical about a little rectangular of mirrored glass, one that supposedly potentially held the contents of an entire library within it. Twilight had respectfully declined to make a purchase. Unlike Pinkie, her bits could be better spent at Inkey Pie's adopted homeland.
Or invested on the local delicacies. Crunchy roasted nuts, sea salted caramel and a novel foreign confectionery the local ponies called lamingtons; squares of light, airy, cake coated with chocolate and dusted with coconut. Those had been a worthwhile investment.
Twilight ate more than was good for her, and gradually, and despite her reservations, she found herself becomming at ease with their self appointed tour guide. Golden Branch was witty, articulate and friendly; ever prepared with some interesting stories about whichever sights Hippocampus had to offer. And one by one, she won her friends over with an ease that Twilight quite honestly felt envious of.
All except one.
Rarity, while maintaining an all around pleasant demeanour, had been reserved all the while. It was the little things that Twilight noticed. The slight, barely perceptible arch of an eyebrow, or a slight pursing of the lips before she spoke. Little signs that only someone that knew the mare well would have seen.
Or at least, someone who knew Rarity well and was not scoffing down salt kelp at a seaside stand. The sun was now setting, and had swelled into an immense, glorious swell of light than seemed to consume the horizon, casting its orange glow upon the sea,. A warm light that alleviated the winter chill somewhat. They had come down to the shoreline to rest from their excursions and shared the place with dozens of other ponies, freshly come from a day of work to relax to the sound of the waves.
Twilight chewed slowly, savouring the the tangy crunch of the kelp as she lay upon the pier, relaxing as the evening light fell upon her. Rarity, at her side, had barely touched hers. “Is something on your mind?” she asked idly, as the mallow white mare stared into the distance. No, Twilight thought. Not into the distance, but rather at her.
“Yes. It's Golden Branch.” Rarity said thoughtfully. “It's been bothering me all day.”
“Is it the outfit? Is it too last year?” Twilight asked, a cheeky grin breaking on her face.
“Oh hush, Twilight dear.” Rarity huffed. “I think she's hiding something. She's not from Hippocampus, or I'm a mule.”
“Well, why don't you just go ask her then?” Twilight sighed, not wanting to argue with one of her best friends.
“Twilight,” Rarity sniffed. “Not everything is like a Daring Do novel; no one is going to reveal everything to you just because you asked nicely. Most ponies are honest with you because you're the Princess's protégé and they think you can read their minds if they're lying.”
“Wha'?” Twilight's jaw hung open. “I can't read minds!” She spluttered. “No one ever could do that – not the Princess. Not Star Swirl even.”
“Not the point, dear.” Rarity replied softly. “But not everyone knows that. But anyway, I doubt she'll tell me where she's actually from..”
“Oh! I would – but you never asked.” Came a cheery voice. “Let's say we make a little guessing game out of it?”
Twilight and Rarity jumped, both caught unawares. Golden Branch's face appeared between them, radiant in the evening sun. “Oh, do go on.” she prompted as she discarded her now empty plate of kelp. “Impress me!”
“Alright then, I will.” Rarity said, her voice serious despite her unsure demeanour. She looked the golden mare up and down a moment, her sharp eyes narrowed in concentration. “I was merely wondering, if you were a Baroness Golden Branch. Or perhaps, a Countess Golden Branch. Or maybe even Duchess Golden Branch. Or perhaps I'm all wrong – but you are surely someone from Canterlot's upper crust.”
“Oh! What a deduction!” Golden Mane chuckled, beaming at Rarity, her smile like a morning sunrise. “How did you come ever up with that? I could be a mere well wisher, for all you know. A simple Earth Pony come to pay her respects to the Elements of Harmony.”
“I think... I really think... I would recognize Hoity Toity's signature style for the various High Organizations in Canterlot. The locals wear human textiles – that nasty unnatural stuff, but yours is a fabric favoured by Hoity.” Rarity said, obviously still unsure, as she eyed the golden mare's ensemble.
“Hoity always adds a double layered patch on the breast which is used for pins and badges or brooches.” Rarity stated as she pointed to the breast of Golden Branch's blouse. Twilight curious despite herself, leaned in for a closer look; there was indeed such a patch.
“In addition, you” Rarity continued, her voice more confident now. “ You talk with a strong Canterlot accent common amongst the nobility. Not to mention that the heavy, ostentatious and very tacky baubles the Canterlot Nobility and Royal Organizations favours leaves big, obvious pin-holes - right there. You've removed your badge.”
There was a pregnant silence and Twilight stared at Golden Branch. Their little game had caught the attention of the rest of her friends and they piled in eager to see how it played out. Golden Branch nodded, comfortable under scrutiny, absolutely beaming rainbows even as Rarity spoke.
“Oh! Miss Rarity,” the sunny mare exclaimed, as she clasped Rarity's hooves in her own. “Oh, you have no idea how impressed I am! You certainly have eye for detail – and you're almost right too. Almost.”
Rarity blinked. “Well?”
“We've dispensed with Hoity Toity's services – and Miss Suri Polomare was commissioned to make more in the same style, but I digress. Maybe destiny erred this time. With that brain of yours, you'd have made a fine Element of Magic.” Golden Branch said brightly.
“You flatter me, Miss Golden Branch.” Rarity replied, sounding half pleased. “But that honour belongs to Twilight.” She gazed sternly at their erstwhile tour guide.
“And now I would like to ask, just who are you, Golden Branch?” she asked. “We're grateful for your company and friendship, darling, but I think there should be no deceptions between us all.”
Golden Branch looked at each of them in turn, nodding all the while, and Twilight thought she say satisfaction, of all things in her eyes. “Let there be no deceptions indeed,” Golden Branch said, her voice laden with amicability.
“I am simply Golden Branch. I have no title to boast of, though I have the honour to represent The Order of the Golden Horn.” She removed a large, bold golden badge from a pouch and held it up to them. A stylized unicorn's head, its horn alight with magic.
“I've seen that before,” Twilight said softly. “Some of Shining Armour's friends had them.”
Unicorn Friends She thought, words unsaid. “What does the Order want with us?”
“Why, the Order seeks the same end as you, dear Twilight.” Golden Branch said, as she stashed her badge away. “Peace, and prosperity for Equestria. To ensure we have a bright future ahead in this dangerous world– we might differ on how we try to achieve it, but it is the same end result that we both want.”
“Do we differ in methods? Twilight asked, curious.
“Oh! We certainly do! ” Golden Branch laughed as she gestured to each of them, pointing to the bases of their necks and to Twilight, her brow – where the Elements would have been, had they worn them.
“See it this way, from my perspective.” Golden Branch explained. “A threat appears, the Elements are assembled and a blast of rainbow light soon follows. And then, oh my! Poof! The threat is gone! Nightmare Moon, Discord, The Changeling Queen and The Mighty Crystal King! All subdued by your hooves.”
“The Elements of Harmony – and the Crystal Heart.” Twilight corrected, as she recalled he burst of pure love that had sent both Changeling Queen and Northern Tryant reeling. “It's not just us; we must not forget the achievements of both Shining Armour and Princess Cadance too.”
“Oh! Forgive me, I was just, well generalizing.” Golden Branch chuckled good naturedly. “It was for simplicity's sake, really. But in any case, be it you six, or for stalwart Shining Armour and benevolent Princess Cadanza. Elements or Crystal Heart, the method is emarkably similar.”
She levelled her gaze at Twilight, looking right into her eyes with a piercing intensity. “You are a group of very special ponies, sharing a very special bond and Equestria is lucky to have you.”
It's not like that! Twilight wanted to say, but something told her that Golden Branch did have a point there. She let the golden mare continue, uninterrupted.
“We differ in methods by necessity, .” Golden Branch continued, almost wistful. “The six of you have a unique bond between all of you, and you have the Elements of Harmony which let you perform wonders beyond even the ability of the Old Kingdom.”
She looked away, almost melancholy. “We do not such advantages, so we must simply make do.”
Twilight stared, unsure on how to proceed. “I would have thought that friendship and harmony would be universal.” she said hesitantly.
“That is a good and noble sentiment to have, Twilight, dear,” Golden Branch smiled wanly. “But not everyone can use friendship and harmony as potently as you six can. Or love like the good Shining Armour and his Princess. We are effectively helpless within their world. ”
“Helpeless? Against what?” Twilight asked, as she exchanged quizzical glances with her friends. “If there were a threat to Equestria, I am certain that the Princess would have informed us.”
“Indeed, Twilight darling.”Rarity agreed quickly. “I am certain the Princess would not permitted us to come had there been some danger.”
“Besides, the humans are all softies.” Rainbow added her two, unnecessary bits worth. “If they attack, I'll kick all their flanks, easy!”
“Um,” Fluttershy began, as she shivered in the chill ocean breeze. “I think that the humans look scary,” she shrank as the deep bass of an iron ship's horn blasted throughout the bay. “And sound scary, and are scary... but I don't think they are um... a threat. Well, that one didn't step on Pinkie...”
Golden Branch looked back at them, unperturbed at their thoughts. “No threat indeed. Not yet. Not now. But potentially soon. Perhaps within a decade. Perhaps a week. It depends on how hard-working the Professor is feeling.”
“The Professor!” Twilight whispered. Equestria had their share of Professors – the colloquial names of the Archmages of Canterlot. But out here, on Earth, Twilight knew of only one. The very thought of the awful mare chilled her and sent a shiver down her spine, cold as an winter's winds.
She recalled the frenzied mare with the horrible weeping scar. “Which Professor?”she asked, hoping that Golden Branch would bring up the name of one of her old instructors in Princess Celestia's Academy. “Is the professor you refer to an angry earth pony? How is she involved and is she a madmare out to ruin Equestria?”
“That's the one, I'm afraid,“ Golden Branch shrugged. “I do not know if she is truly mad, but I suppose actions speak louder than words.”
“So, she really is a madmare, then.”
“Oh, oh no!” Golden Branch gasped. “On the contrary, I do respect her, and her work. You've heard of MENSA? No? Think of it as a human organization for intellectuals. She's trying to get as many Earth Ponies to join as possible – see, she's not so bad? I have no problem with that, except that she only seems to encourage Earth Ponies to participate.”
“So what then? Are you implying she's racist?” Twilight pressed for something, anything to make a report for the Princess later.
“Oh, oh, no. Stop putting words in my mouth.” Golden Branch shook her head, a lightly irritated gesture. “What I'm saying is that she's a very, very, very intelligent Earth Pony, despite her eccentricities- and her skin condition. As far as we know, she is not directly antagonistic to Equestria. But her backers, the Bellerophon Institute...”
“Go on, Golden Branch.” Twilight said, her ears perked up and listening. In the distance, a great iron ship passed, obscuring the setting sun and casting a cold shadow upon them all. Golden Branch spared it a brief look as she leaned in closely, her voice lowered to a mere whisper.
“Ostentatiously they're here promote cooperation between them and us,” she said, her voice low, in a conspirational tone. “But the Order looks beneath the surface; The Institute is far from a singular entity. They are in truth, a worldwide collaboration of corporations, universities and laboratories. America, Australia, China, France, Germany, Japan, Korea, Russia and The United Kingdom. Do these names mean anything to you?”
“I'm afraid not.” Twilight answered, an ominous feeling welling up within her breast. “I would say, that they are countries”
“Oh! Quite Right, dear Twilight.” Golden Branch whispered, her voice grim and containing no trace of her seemingly ever present good humour. “Quite right indeed. These are the names of the wealthiest and most militarily powerful nations in Human Earth.”
Militarily Powerful. Twilight felt an inward twinge of discomfort. Nightmare Moon's hellish legions had been Militarily powerful. King Sombra's Crystal Empire had been Militarily Powerful. Old Griffonia had been Militarily Powerful. Mothers all over Equestria had invoked their names to scare mischievous colts and fillies into good behaviour.
Golden Branch held up a hoof. “Perhaps they are not actively malicious against Equestria just yet, but I do know for certain that they're not going out of their way to ensure that Equestria becomes the foremost nation of the age.”
The ship passed and suddenly all was illuminated once again. Twilight blinked, and rubbed her temples with her hooves. “Hasn't the Princess heard about them then. If the Order believes they're a potential threat?” she asked. Already, inside her head, the gears were beginning to spin. A letter, no, a report for the Princess in the works.
Golden Branch nodded. “Oh yes, she has, oh yes indeed.” She said as she sneaked a glance towards the barrier, blue and immense in the distance. “We have voiced our views on the matter on several several occasions.”
“And so, the Princess,” she continued with a grimace. “Has sent her nephew, Prince Blueblood to Singapore. He is the Equestrian Ambassador to Earth and is also the chief liaison to the Bellerophon Institute; and represents Equestria's interests.”
Twilight cringed at the name. Prince Blueblood? She thought. It's a miracle no one out here has declared war on us yet.
“Oh dear,” she heard Fluttershy whisper, right along with Rainbow Dash's own condescending laugh.
“Ohhhhh,” Pinkie exclaimed. “So that's why we haven’t seen him since the Gala! What's wrong with that anyway? I don't think he can do any harm out here!”
“He hasn't used his brains since Princess Celestia's Academy for Gifted Unicorns.” Twilight stated directing her voice and disapproval towards her friends, all of whom had various degrees of concern etched on their faces. Pinkie and Rainbow seemed unperturbed, while A.J and Fluttershy showed a modicum of discomfort, with Rarity's stories about the gala still well within their memories. And as for Rarity, the unicorn mare just looked plain sour at the mention of the stallion, as if she had swallowed a lemon.
“But the important thing is, girls. “Golden Branch added, her tone utterly serious. “Do you think either of those two is up to the task of promoting Equestria's interests?”
There was a thoughtful silence. Out of the corner of her eye, Twilight could see Rarity gently shaking her head. As for herself, she could imagine the potential disaster already, her mind providing her with appropriate images.
Images of the adolescent Blueblood, exactly as she remembered him from the academy. Three years her senior, his white coat marred by an frsh outbreak of acne and his braces flashing in the morning sun as he stuffed his snotty muzzle into a human lady's derrière. This mental scene was quickly followed by that of an endless hoard of human warriors, baying for royal blood as they beat upon Canterlot's gates and shook the castle to its foundations.
It's like a nightmare! Twilight thought as her friends gathered about her. But it's funny, because Blueblood is in it.
“No,” Four voices chorused along with Twilight's, all unanimous in their dislike.
“Um....” Fluttershy squeaked. “No?”
“Then I hope you see why The Order is so concerned,” Golden Branch laughed, as she exchanged sly grins with each of them. “The Prince is hardly a genius statesman.”
“That is true,” Twilight agreed, finally feeling better, now that the problem had been quantified and measured in her mind. Blueblood, she could handle. “Would you need a report to the Princess?”
“No,” Golden Branch smiled approvingly at each of them in turn, a gesture that Twilight found comfortingly similar to Princess Celestia. “Not yet at least. What I would like you to do is to go to Singapore and see for yourselves. Make your own opinions. Come to your own conclusions.”
“What? That's it?” Twilight yelped, genuinely surprised. Of all the things she had Golden Branch to say, this had not been one of them. “After all that talk about differences and methods and... and...potential disaster?”
“Ya give us that big, huge speech, and that's all ya' want from us?” A.J echoed her sentiments. “Jus' to take a look-see?”
“Yeah!” Rainbow cried. “If Equestria is threatened, we're gonna' jump straight in and kick some flanks! Royal flanks!”
Around her, Twilight heard the various protests of her friends. All except Fluttershy, who had elected to remain silent, and surprisingly Rarity, who just looked concerned.
“Well,” Rarity sighed. “She does have a point there.” She said, her voice carrying a reluctant tone.
“Oh come on, Rarity!” Rainbow cried. “It's Blueblood! Dumber than Snips and Snails on a bad day!”
“Well, Rainbow.” Rarity said, defensive. “I would like to think that Fancypants's mediation has helped end the animosity between the Prince and I, but even though I have no confidence in his abilities whatsoever, I think I would like to see for myself before I jump to conclusions. We've written a fair few friendship reports on the subject, I believe. Let's not be too hasty to damn that idiot.”
“Exactly,” Golden Branch agreed rather benevolently. “You six have amongst your number, the brightest ponies Equestria has to offer. And, not to mention, your word carries more weight with the Princess than mine, or any of my Order. Your recommendation might help sway the Princesses - if there is something to report, of course.”
There was a stunned silence, and Twilight exchanged worried glances with her friends. Caught in their communal disdain for the prince, she had nearly forgotten that Golden Branch was there at all.
“I'm sorry.” Twilight said hesitantly. “I don't know – it all seems to makes sense, I guess. But it also seems to me that you're trying to manipulate us. You've been friendly to us, but we don't know you that well – we've just met today.”
“Oh, Twilight dear.” Golden Branch smiled gently. “Between friends of course, I am trying to manipulate you. By talking, I have been trying to convince you - aligning you to my world view by definition." She continued, remarkably blase to her admission.
“But remember,” she warned, her voice sincere and a soulful expression upon her face that Twilight had seen Princess Celestia wear before; when she thought that no one else was looking; thoughtful, yet weary from care and concern. . “Every word one says represents something, every gesture even. Everything has meaning to it. I like to think that my intentions and my words and actions remain congruent, and that I am open in my dealings. And as for the Institute, well, that remains to be seen...”
“So let me be clear in my intent.” she continued, slowly and gravely, as solemn as the winter's morning. “Something is very wrong, out here, and I intend to get to the bottom of it. I will not ask you to commit to my cause, but will you at least take a look into the matter?”
Twilight stared, an unpleasant feeling bubbling up within her. An uncomfortable mixture of trepidation and sea salt caramel. Around her, her friends huddled, shaken and uneasy. And she could sympathize with that. They were on a holiday and no one wanted to be caught up in a conspiracy on a holiday. But then, A.J nodded, her countenance serious, protective even. Rarity soon followed, nodding fiercely, along with Rainbow. Pinkie grinned her assent and pulled Fluttershy into a comforting hug. A wispy, shy little “yes, um, I think I'm in,” soon followed.
“Golden Branch.” Twilight said, her voice determined “We're in.”
“Thank you for your faith, truly.” The mare broke into a relieved smile, as she nodded along with them. “To be absolutely honest, I did not expect to get your ears so easily and if I may ask, what time is your flight?”
“Ten sharp!” Rarity recalled.
“Oh Lovely!” Golden Branch cried happily, “There's time for dinner then – I can give you a brief overview of what I know while we eat. Come on girls, I know a good place near the airport that all the travel writers recommend... Trenderhoof, Ram Sea, Yotsuba... all the big names in the field.”
Hours later, when Golden Branch had bid them goodbye and had promised to meet them in Singapore, they crossed through into the departure lounge. But Twilight didn't remember much of it. In fact, she felt so bloated from the good food and the worrying information that Golden Branch had fed them, that she almost forgot to be sick on the plane.
