When changeling infiltrators are detected in Ponyville, the Secret Intelligence Service sends one of its best agents to root them out.
When changeling infiltrators are detected in Ponyville, the Secret Intelligence Service sends one of its best agents to root them out. Lieutenant Thunderball is a former airborne infantrypony and SAS trooper who is about to take on his toughest mission yet: dealing with the inhabitants of Ponyville.
Lightning flashed across the stormy skies over Ponyville, followed shortly by a crack of thunder loud enough to rattle the windows of the houses down below. Sheets of freezing rain poured from the heavens in a torrential downpour, soaking any soul unfortunate enough to be caught outside that evening.
Rainbow Dash loved the weather. She soared through the skies riding the powerful storm winds, enjoying the sheer thrill of being out in such dangerous weather. Nothing got her adrenaline pumping faster than dodging lightning bolts or feeling the shockwave of a thunderclap squeeze through her body and force the air out of her lungs.
A brilliant stroke of light heralded the next lightning bolt, and Rainbow banked left to avoid it. To her great surprise, it terminated less than ten yards from her right with a blinding flash followed by a deafening thunderclap. When her eyes and ears recovered, she noticed a gray pegasus heavily laden with saddlebags flying slightly above her and to her right, yelling something into the wind.
"What?" Rainbow asked, flying closer so she could hear him.
"I said you shouldn't be flying in this weather," the stallion shouted, with a distinct Canterlot accent. "Cloudsdale civil aviation code chapter 3 title 1 section 102 clearly states that—"
"You have got to be kidding me," Rainbow yelled back. "I'm in charge of the weather here! I know what it says!"
"Then you know better than to be out here! The chances of getting struck by lightning—"
"Please, I've done this a hundred times! I'm too awesome to get hit by lightning."
"You're being ridiculous! Lightning will try to discharge into the nearest object capable of bearing a negative char—"
The explanation was cut short by another lightning bolt which scored a direct hit on the pegasus. Rainbow could have sworn she saw his skeleton light up for a moment before his smoking body plunged straight down towards the ground. She stared in horror for a moment before her instincts kicked in. Rainbow tucked her wings in tightly to reduce the drag on her body as she dived to catch him.
200 meters. 150 meters. 100 meters. 50 meters.
Rainbow Dash wrapped her hooves around his limp body a dozen meters above the Ponyville town square and pulled upwards sharply. His body jerked as she stopped him from hitting the streets, hard enough to bring him back to consciousness. He shook himself out of Rainbow's grasp and landed on the ground, only for his legs to give out from under him.
He lay in the mud unmoving as the smell of burned hair filled the air. "Why am I smoking?"
Rainbow laughed nervously as she scratched the back of her head with a hoof. "Yeah, you, um, might have gotten struck by lightning when you were telling me to stop flying because I might be struck by lightning. Gimme a sec to make sure you don't have a concussion or anything, alright?"
The stallion groaned and rolled his eyes as he endured a prompt checkup. Rainbow looked into his green eyes to make sure they were focused before running her hooves through his frazzled dark blue mane, ruffled wings, and docked tail to check for burns.
"So tell me, doc, how long do I have?" he grumbled as she inspected his horseshoe–clad hooves for injury.
"Oh, I'd say two, three centuries tops," Rainbow replied casually as she tugged his saddlebags back into place, inadvertently revealing his cutie mark: a sphere of electricity.
He shook himself free of her grasp and drew himself upright. "Well, at least I'm in Ponyville now. I don't suppose you could point me towards the library?"
"Don't tell me you came through the storm to check out a book? I know you eggheads love reading, but—"
"I'm here to see Princess Sparkle," he snorted.
"Oh, really?" Rainbow's eyes lit up. "Cool, I'm friends with her! Let me take you, it's right down the street."
Before the stallion could respond, Rainbow trotted off towards the library at a brisk pace, leaving a confused pony in her wake. He shook his head and followed her with weary resignation. It was not long before they stood under the branches of the Golden Oaks Library, with Rainbow Dash enthusiastically knocking at the door. After a brief pounding, it opened to reveal a disgruntled Spike.
"Do you know what time it is?" he grumbled. "I was about to go to bed."
Rainbow gave him a hearty smack on the shoulders. "Nice to see you too, Spike. Is Twilicorn still up?"
The stallion glared at her upon hearing the irreverent nickname, while Spike simply shrugged.
"Is it before midnight? Then Twilight's should still be in the study."
"Thanks, Spike!" Rainbow walked in followed by the pegasus, while Spike yawned and went back to his bed. The two entered Twilight's private study, where she was busy searching through an ancient tome filled with arcane writing. They stood patiently for thirty whole seconds for Twilight to notice their presence, with Rainbow constantly clearing her throat. The stallion seemed content to wait for however long it took, but Rainbow had had enough. She picked up a crumpled sheet of parchment from the wastebasket and threw it at Twilight's horn before her companion could stop her.
Twilight's head shot up immediately and she caught the piece of litter in the air right before it hit the ground. The stallion found himself impressed; the princess had great reflexes, even for an alicorn.
Twilight looked around to see who had thrown it and smiled. "Rainbow Dash!" Twilight pushed the book away and got out of her seat to greet her friend. Rainbow gave an enthusiastic high–hoof, while the pegasus dropped to his knees.
"Your Highness," he said while facing the floor.
"Oh, um… Hi there!" Twilight looked flustered at the royal attention. "Who are you?"
"Lt. Thunderball, SIS," he answered stiffly, keeping his eyes focused steadily on the ground. An awkward atmosphere filled the library as he remained kneeling in front of her.
"Er… You can get up now. No need to stand on ceremony for me."
Thunderball finally rose and stood at attention. "Thank you, Your Highness."
Twilight sighed, while Rainbow Dash giggled. "So, Lieutenant, to what do I owe the honor of this visit?"
"Princess Celestia has asked that I brief you on the status of changeling infiltration in Equestria and that I assist you in apprehending any changelings present in Ponyville."
Rainbow took a step back from the conversation. “Sounds like that'll take a while, Twi. Maybe I should leave you two alone and come back tomorrow.”
"And go out in this weather?" Twilight cocked her head. "Rainbow, are you crazy?"
"Come on, you know I've flown through worse." Thunderball shot Rainbow a stern glance as the room was lit up as bright as day, followed shortly by a thunderclap that shook the books on the shelves. "...On second thought, it is kind of a rough night. Don't suppose you'd mind a sleepover?"
The proposal brought a warm smile to Twilight's face. "Sure, let me just get Slumber: 101."
Thunderball raised his hoof in mild annoyance. "Your Highness, I have sensitive information for your ears only. May I talk to you in private? Now?"
"Don't worry, you can speak freely here." Twilight casually levitated the book down from her bookshelf. "I trust Rainbow."
Thunderball gave her a skeptical look for a few moments before finally laying out dozens of photographs on Twilight's desk. Many of them depicted scenes from festivals across Equestria in the past year. Twilight had attended some of them and could occasionally spot herself along with her friends. In each photograph, ponies had been circled who closely matched one another, down to their cutie marks.
Twilight urgently leafed through the evidence until she had covered the desk in photographs and reports. "Are you telling me that changelings are still impersonating ponies in Equestria?"
Lt. Thunderball nodded tensely, but his voice remained as calm as ever. "It's been going on since at least a year prior to the invasion, Your Highness. Our intelligence analysts have been going over old photographs trying to see if we could spot any signs. So far, we can confirm that there are multiple changelings in Ponyville, which constitutes an imminent threat to your person. I was immediately dispatched to inform you of the problem and ensure your security." He gave Rainbow Dash a long, hard look. "I would respectfully suggest we start with Spike and the rest of your friends before working our way onto the general Ponyville population."
"Hold on a minute!" Rainbow's nostrils flared upon hearing the accusation. "You're the one who showed up out of the blue with this wild story about changelings infiltrating Equestria, but we haven't heard anything from Celestia herself about this, even though she could have just mailed a letter to Spike saying, 'Hey, watch out for changelings.' How do we know you're not a changeling?"
"Ma'am, if you're accusing me of being one of those da—" He caught himself mid–sentence and took a deep breath. "creatures, I would like to point out that their assumed forms lose cohesion when subject to extreme trauma or disruption, such as being struck by lightning."
Rainbow's eye's narrowed dangerously as she stepped close enough to Thunderball that their reflections became mirrored in each other's eyes. "According to the reports you gave us? Yeah, really rigorous proof there."
Twilight stepped between them and shoved the pair apart. "Break it up you two! Look, Rainbow, I appreciate your concern, but you don't have to be so worried. There's a very simple spell to determine if the lieutenant is a changeling or not. I used it during the changeling invasion of Canterlot last year."
"Then cast away," Thunderball snorted, glaring at Rainbow Dash. Twilight's horn glowed purple for a brief moment. A narrow beam of violet energy struck Thunderball right between the eyes, and he collapsed like he had been hit by lightning again.
"Oh my gosh!" Rainbow rushed over to the stallion and helped him to his feet.
The aid was poorly received, as Thunderball pushed her away the moment his shaking legs could carry his weight. "So can we agree I'm not a changeling?"
"I'm so sorry about that!" Twilight pulled out an old spellbook from behind her and began rifling through the pages. "I had no idea that would happen. Something must have gone wrong with the differential of the containment field — the scalar vector of the sinusoidal carrier wave must require additional dimensional constraints in order to avoid arcane backlash. Not a problem in combat, of course, but for diagnostic use, it needs to have the exponential factor adjusted by a magnitude or more."
Thunderball exchanged a concerned glance with Rainbow Dash as Twilight poured out enough speculation to fill a doctoral thesis in quantum thaumaturgy. "It's fine, Your Highness. I've had worse."
Rainbow slapped him between the wings. "Yeah, like when that lightning bolt hit you!. Still amazed you came out of that in one piece."
The dialogue had the intended effect, as Twilight stopped her speculation mid–sentence to focus on what she had just heard. "You were struck by lightning?"
"Yes." Thunderball glared at Rainbow Dash. "Right after warning your friend to stay out of the skies in this weather."
Rainbow's wings shot up immediately. "Hey! Then how come you were flying around, hotshot?"
Thunderball raised his wings as well, his hair bristling. "Ma'am, I think you'll find that the military aviation code differs substantially from the civil one. If you ever bother to read them."
Twilight raised her voice, which stopped the dispute in its tracks. "Enough with the arguing! Don't make me turn that into an order."
Rainbow Dash blushed and scratched the back of her head with a hoof. "Sorry, Twilight."
Thunderball bowed to hide his embarrassment. "Apologies, Your Highness. But we still need to ensure that the premises are secure."
"I'll take care of it Lieutenant. Trust me, I've handled changelings before." Twilight tidied up the photographs with her magic and stuffed them into the envelope. "Well, if that will be all, I think it's high time we went to bed. Thank you for the briefing, Lieutenant. I'd like to sleep on this before drawing up a more comprehensive plan. Would you like to stay the night as well? I have a spare bed down in the basement."
There was an almost imperceptible pause after Twilight mentioned her basement before Thunderball responded. "That will be fine, Your Highness." Thunderball bowed again, but remained in the room standing at attention.
"Alright; don't hesitate to make yourself at home!" Twilight subtly gestured that Thunderball was dismissed. "Just don't mess up my book filing system!"
He saluted sharply, clicked his rear hooves together, and trotted out of the room. Rainbow Dash did her best to keep a straight face during all of it, but broke down the instant the door closed behind him.
"Wow. I knew royal guards were uptight, but that guy's something else."
"Actually, the Secret Intelligence Service isn't a branch of the Royal Guards at all. It's Section 6 of the Military Intelligence Directorate."
The definition drew a blank stare from Rainbow Dash. "Right...and the difference is...?"
Twilight slowly massaged her temples. "He's a spy, not a soldier."
Rainbow's eyes lightened up as she grasped Twilight's point. "Wow! You mean like Roger Maare?"
"...That is a fictional character, but yes."
"Cool! I wonder if he's ever ridden a jet ski over Neighagra Falls while being chased by zebras bent on replacing Princess Celestia with an impostor!"
"...That was the fourth Roger Maare novel."
"Well yeah, but I'm sure he does all sort of awesome super secret spy stuff!"
"Actually, most intelligence consists of analyzing information, not fieldwork. And even if he did have field experience, he probably couldn't tell you about it because it'd be classified."
"Wow, way to burst my bubble there, Twi."
"Sorry Rainbow. How about I get you some hot chocolate to make up for it? Extra marshmallows."
Rainbow licked her chops as she started to drool. "Throw in the new Daring Do book and you've got a deal!"
Meanwhile, in the basement...
Thunderball had walked onto the basement stairs and closed the door behind him. He immediately reached into his saddlebags, pulled out a bright flashlight, and swung its beam around cautiously before he located the lightswitch, which he pressed with indecent haste. Light soon flooded the basement, revealing all of Twilight's laboratory equipment, a small private library of scientific textbooks and reference material, and a cot she slept in when her research kept her up late at night.
After setting his saddlebags down by the bed, he wandered through the laboratory and collected as many lamps as possible. He picked up a power strip and plugged as many of the lights into it as he could before setting them in a pattern around the cot so that they'd illuminate the entire basement should the ceiling lights go out. After all, Princess Twilight had warned him against disturbing her filing system, not her interior lighting.
He hesitated before climbing into the bed. It was just a simple cot, but Her Highness had used it often enough that she'd left her indentation on the mattress and her scent on the sheets. Sleeping in the same bed as royalty would be awkward, but it would have been impolite to turn down the offer. He decided to compromise by removing the mattress and laying a sleeping bag over the cot's metal frame.
Thunderball turned on the lamps and was almost ready to settle into his sleeping bag before he noticed a curious device on the top shelf of Princess Twilight's personal science library. He smiled as he recognized it as a plasma globe and unplugged a lamp to make room for it around the cot. The electrode in the middle of the globe came to life and began to discharge purple plasma filaments into the glass sphere in a soothing display that gradually lulled him to sleep after a very rough day.
The Adjutant–General of the Hive examined the model of a rainbow–haired cyan pegasus in her hooves. Whoever made it was a master of the craft; not only were the proportions correct, but the pose was very lifelike, and the colors of the pegasus's mane were even arranged by their prismatic order. The cutie mark on the pony's flank was miniscule, but drawn with enough precision that she could tell it was a cloud with a tri–colored lightning bolt coming out of it. This was a perfect scaled–down model of the famous Rainbow Dash.
She put it back where she had found it, on a large map of Ponyville, the size of a small tablecloth. It joined several other clay figures, Twilight Sparkle and her friends among them. It was quite an impressive effort at depicting the residents of Ponyville.
How much did it cost? Adjutant frowned as she ran the numbers in her head. Resources were short in the hive, and they could ill afford to divert workers and supplies away from food production or infiltration. Who had the time to make several hundred models and then paint them? What was the point of this chamber, anyways?
A grey pony model, surrounded in a green telekinetic field, slowly floated past Adjutant's eyes and was slowly lowered onto the library, where it joined the models of Twilight, Rainbow, and Spike.
"I don't like that one," a venomous voice hissed. "He knows too much."
"I agree, my Queen." The drone studied the models on the map. "But at least we will have a chance to rectify our mistake. He is vulnerable, and can be easily dispatched."
"Our mistake?" The temperature in the room dropped several degrees as Queen Chrysalis stalked around the table until she loomed over her drone. "Do you mean to imply that it was my fault that he escaped our wrath? Need I remind you, Adjutant, that he is only alive because one of your operatives lost his nerve?"
"No, my Queen," Adjutant dropped to her knees and laid her head at Chrysalis's hooves. "Forgive me. When I said 'our', I only intended to refer to the warrior caste. I would not dare to impugn your glorious leadership."
"Good." Chrysalis laid a lazy hoof on Thunderball's figurine. "I trust that there will be no more mistakes. The grey one will die. After that, we move on to the stage two. How many changelings did you say are in Ponyville right now?"
"A few dozen. Enough to justify our excursion."
"Excellent." Chrysalis raised her hoof and swept Thunderball, Twilight, Spike, and a good portion of the townsfolk off the map in one blow, showering Adjutant with figurines. "Pick those up for me, will you?" she cooed sweetly as she stepped out of the room.
There was no sun in the basement of the Golden Oaks Library, but that did not stop Thunderball's biological clock from sounding its alarm at exactly six AM. He bolted upright, panting wildly as his eyes scanned the room, only to slowly calm down as he realized he was alone. He turned off the various lamps that he had gathered around himself the previous night before walking up the stairs into the library. Bright rays of sunshine streamed through the windows and into the empty building. The sight inspired him to open his mouth in a yawn and drink in the light as if it were water.
Thunderball made his way through the library to the kitchen, with surprisingly little noise for a pony wearing horseshoes, and opened a window to let in the fresh country air. He put a pot of water on the stove to boil for oatmeal and scrambled half a dozen eggs on the stove. The eggs had just heated to perfection when something crashed into the side of the library hard enough to shake the tree trunk. The eggs were launched high up into the air, and he dove after them, barely managing to catch them in the skillet before they hit the ground.
"What in Celestia's name was that?" he mumbled though the handle in his mouth.
"Probably the mail," Rainbow Dash answered nonchalantly as she walked into the kitchen. "Mmm, do I smell eggs?"
Thunderball looked at her incredulously. "What kind of mail crashes into the library?"
A gray pegasus stuck her head into the library through the window. Thunderball stared into the strangest set of golden eyes he had ever seen in a pony; one was pointed directly at him while the other looked Rainbow Dash in the face. "'Morning Rainbow Dash! I've never seen you up this early before!"
"Hey, Derpy! I got stuck with a morning shift today. Bleh, can you imagine clearing clouds at this hour?"
"Well, I hope you have a good day anyways! By the way, I got some mail for Twilight." The mailmare ruffled through her bag before dropping a mouthful of letters into the kitchen sink.
Rainbow gathered them up and stacked them neatly on the countertop. "Why don't you come in for a bite to eat? Thunderball makes great scrambled eggs!"
Derpy looked around curiously, one eye settling on Thunderball while the other seemed to stare at the ceiling. "Eggs? Not muffins?"
Rainbow scrounged about the kitchen before coming up with a white porcelain jar. "Sorry, the closest we have are some sugar cookies."
"It's okay, I'll just buy some from Pinkie later," Derpy said. "So who's Thunderbolt?"
Thunderball raised his hoof. "Hello. And it's 'Thunderball,' ma'am."
Derpy waved enthusiastically. "Oh hi! So, are you new in town? If you need to set up a mailing address just let me know, alright?"
"Uh, sure. I'll keep that in mind, but I'm only visiting."
"Well, don't discount the idea," she giggled. "Lots of ponies who come here end up staying, like Twilight! And me! Something about this place seems to draw in ponies. All the love and good cheer, I guess!"
"And don't forget the awesome mail service," Rainbow added, before whispering to Thunderball, "Just don't let her help you with anything else, unless you want it destroyed."
Derpy's ear twitched, but she kept smiling. "Well, I need to deliver a package to Caramel, so I'll see you around! Bye Rainbow! Welcome to Ponyville, Thunderbolt!"
Rainbow waved as the mailmare flew off lopsidedly towards her next stop, while Thunderball shook his head.
"It's Thunder...ball..." But by then, she was already out of earshot. "...Are you sure she's good at mail delivery?" he said once she was safely out of earshot. "And please tell me that isn't actually her name."
"Her name's actually Ditzy Doo, but everypony I know calls her Derpy. And she's great at delivering mail, if only because she's a disaster at everything else."
"That's… nice." Thunderball dumped the eggs onto a plate and set it on the table before serving himself up bowl of oatmeal.
He thought over the mailmare as he sprinkled sugar onto the oatmeal; she seemed normal enough — a bit of an airhead, but likely harmless. Then again, working in the post office would give an infiltrator a perfect opportunity to monitor communications in Ponyville among the non–dragon population.
She mentioned that she was an immigrant to Ponyville. From where? How long ago? Had she settled here because of the friendly small–town atmosphere, or was it literally due to the "love and good cheer"?
The train of thought was suddenly derailed by an awe–inspiring belch; Thunderball looked up to see Rainbow was sitting in front of a clean plate that used to hold his eggs.
"You're a good cook, you know? Eggs were light and fluffy, but you seasoned them too lightly."
Thunderball stared at her wordlessly and consoled himself with the oatmeal. Rainbow watched him for a moment before continuing. "Why the cold treatment? Still think I'm a changeling?"
The wary expression on Thunderball's face lightened and became slightly more predatory. "If I did, I wouldn't tell you."
"You let me sit in on your top secret briefing last night, didn't you?"
"Yes. Yes I did." Thunderball leaned in so he was face to face with her and lowered his voice to a whisper. "Now here's the question: how much of what I told you was true, and how much was misinformation to feed to your changeling conspirators?"
Rainbow rolled her eyes at his mindgames. "Change of topic: how was your night?"
The stallion shrugged and tossed a pinch of cinnamon into his oatmeal. "I slept fairly well. Yourself?"
"Stayed up all night with Twilight reading the new Daring Do book and catching up, of course. We really don't get to hang out enough these days, what with my Wonderbolt training and her being a princess and all."
The barest hint of a smile tugged at the sides of Thunderball's mouth. "Isn't that a children's series?"
"Daring Do happens to be written for ponies of all ages!"
"I suppose you read it for the plot." The emphasis on the last syllable left little doubt as to Thundeball's meaning.
Rainbow fumed for a moment before speaking again. "Alright, now it's your turn! "What can you tell me about the Secret Service?"
Thunderball dropped his spoon into the oatmeal as his eyes shot up to meet Rainbow's. "Pardon?"
"How do I get in? Is the pay good? What do they have you do?"
Thunderball stared at her for a long moment. "...Are you seriously thinking about joining?"
Rainbow’s response was to puff out her chest and spread her wings. "Well, that depends on if they can handle a mare as awesome as me."
Thunderball rolled his eyes. "You get into the SIS when they decide that they want you. They typically go after promising fliers in the royal guards or the Equestrian army. I was an aerial assault specialist in the Special Air Service myself when I was transferred. They pay… well, the pay's terrible, they work you to death, and the only medals you'll ever get are kept in a locked room under Canterlot Castle, but the benefits are good, and you will always know at the end of the day you did your part in making Equestria safer."
Rainbow edged in uncomfortably close to Thunderball. "So, they must have had you in a field position, eh? Got any cool stories?"
Thunderball shifted his seat away from her. "Uh, I really can't tell you anything."
"Come on, I'm Rainbow Dash! Wonderbolt in training, friend to Princess Twilight, and bearer of the Element of Loyalty. Who could possibly be more trustworthy than me?"
"The Element of Honesty?"
Rainbow threw her hooves up in the air. "One story! That's all I ask!"
The persistent questions were annoying Thunderball; Rainbow Dash reminded him far too much of the army shrinks he had to deal with. They insisted upon asking probing questions about his physical and psychological health until he had become fed up and told them what they wanted to hear so that he could return to doing actual work.
That gave him an idea. His expression became a shade more predatory again as his voice sank low. "What I am about to tell you cannot leave the walls of this library."
–
The sound of cannons roared from the walls and ramparts of the dark fortress. Twenty soldiers of the Equestrian Army's 3rd infantry battalion were pinned down in a ditch by the road leading to the fortress.
"I'm hit! I'm hit!" their sergeant screamed as shrapnel exploded around him.
"Medic!" somepony shouted as the sergeant was pulled out of harm's way by his lance corporal.
"Dammit, where are those reinforcements? We're sitting ducks out here!"
"1st company reports heavy resistance in the hills; they won't be able to make it!"
"Don't worry Sarge, you'll be alright!"
"For the love of Equestria, where are the tranquilizers? Where's my tourniquet?"
Private Bucky, the newest and youngest member of the squad, huddled in fear and flattened himself on the ground in a desperate attempt to find safety from the bombardment.
"It's over, dear Celestia, it's all over," he whimpered as the earth exploded all around him.
"It's never over!" a bold voice shouted over the din. The soldiers turned around to see an earth pony stallion dressed in an uniform seemingly made out of the Equestrian flag, with the image of the sun emblazoned on the shield that he carried. He stood tall and proud despite the carnage around him and extended a hoof towards Bucky.
"Come on soldier! On your hooves! This is no time to be lying about."
Bucky raised a shaking hoof towards the newcomer and found himself pulled upright.
"Soldiers of Equestria, we can't stay here waiting for death to find us! Come, let us take action!"
"Well what do you suggest we do?" the sergeant shouted back.
"Follow me and charge!" The stallion raised his shield to block a burst of shrapnel and jumped into the ditch. He ran through it and towards the fortress. "Come on ponies! Do you want to live forever?"
A mighty cheer rose from the ranks as the men followed the stallion. The cannons could not bring themselves to bear on the rapidly moving charge and the soldiers soon made it to the wrought iron gate of the fortress. The stallion leading them did not break his stride as he raised his shield and rammed it into the gate at full speed.
There was a deafening crash that rang through the air as the gate gave way to reveal the fortress courtyard, and the hundreds of spear–wielding soldiers assembled to meet them.
"So, you zought zat you could just march your little toy soldiers up to mein fortress and conquer it, did you?" Their leader sneered as he made his way forward. Bucky gasped in terror at what he saw; a red unicorn with a skull–like head.
"Yeah, that about sums it up." The stallion shrugged. "Just like last time."
"ZIS WILL NOT BE LIKE LAST TIME, MEIN FRIEND!" the red unicorn shouted. "FOR YOU ZERE SHALL BE NO VICTORY OR ESCAPE FROM MEIN GRASP! TODAY YOU SHALL DIE!"
With that, the unicorn charged forward to meet his nemesis in combat as a frantic melee broke out around them. Though outnumbered, the Equestrian soldiers fought bravely from the gate, where their enemy's numerical advantage would be lessened. Meanwhile, the stallion and unicorn exchanged blow after blow in a battle so furious that none dared approach them. Each kick from the stallion hit upon a magical barrier protecting the unicorn, while each blast of magic the unicorn mustered merely bounced off of the stallion's shield, often hitting one of the unfortunate enemy soldiers nearby.
The stalemate continued until the unicorn quickly cast a spell on the courtyard floor, turning the dirt under his opponent into a sticky pit of mud. As the stallion struggled to gain his balance, the unicorn formed a magical sword overhead and brought it down to bear at the stallion's head.
An energy blast caught the unicorn in the chest just before the spell could finish and launched him across the courtyard into a flowing marble fountain, which shattered into a thousand pieces from the force of the impact.
Everypony looked up to see what appeared to be an alicorn in a suit of red and gold armor slowly descending from the sky, though the wings and horn were part of the armor itself. The powerful thrust provided by the suit's wings seemed matched only by the jets of energy that it emitted from its hooves.
"Now isn't that just like you to start a party without me, Captain?" The pony in the suit laughed as she —
–
"Hold on one Celestia–forsaken minute!" Rainbow Dash pounded the table with her hooves. "You're just telling me a Captain Equestria and Iron Mare story!"
Thunderball grinned like a colt who had been caught with his hoof in the cookie jar. "Guilty as charged! How do you know so much about comics?"
Rainbow Dash blushed. "Well… Well… How do you?"
Now it was Thunderball's turn to be flustered. "Don't change the subject!"
They stared each other down and Rainbow Dash flicked her tail in annoyance. "Why won't you just tell me about what you do?"
Thunderball threw his hooves up in the air. "Fine! I sit around in an office all day reading reports, alright?"
"You're telling me the Secret Service recruited an aerial assault specialist to read reports?"
"Yes, that is exactly what I'm telling you!"
"Of all the—"
"Rainbow Dash! Are you pestering Lieutenant Thunderball?"
Both pegasi looked at the entrance to see Twilight walking into the kitchen and exchanged glances.
"Uhh...no?"
"Everything's fine, Your Highness. We were just having a...conversation about superponies."
"Oh! I didn't know you liked comics," Twilight said brightly as she poured herself a glass of orange juice. "Who's your favorite superpony, Thunderball?"
The stallion looked distinctly uncomfortable at being referred to so informally. By a princess asking a personal question, no less. "Er...Deadpony, Your Highness."
"Really? Mine's Dr. Weird, the Sorcerer Supreme."
"Ooh! Ooh! Mine's Nightwing! She is, without a doubt, the coolest superhero ever!"
"Well, you would like her, wouldn't you?" Twilight chuckled as she sat down by the table. "So, what's the plan for today, you two?"
Rainbow Dash tapped her hoof on the table. "I've got weather management this morning, followed by a Wonderbolt training session in the afternoon."
"Well, that would be something." The enthusiasm in Thunderball's voice earned him an odd look from Rainbow Dash. "I wanted to join the Wonderbolts when I was younger, but I didn't make the cut."
The other two ponies looked at him in surprise. Rainbow seemed particularly sympathetic. "Sorry to hear that. It sucks when you can’t live out your dreams."
"No regrets." Thunderball's voice suggested the opposite, but not even Rainbow Dash was tactless enough to point it out. "I ended up in the right place in the end, so it all worked out for the best. Speaking of which, I was hoping we could perform a cursory examination of Ponyville. Perhaps meet with the other Bearers to make sure they haven't been replaced by changelings? Though I can't imagine we'd get very far zapping them. That spell you used on me last night was unpleasant, to say the least."
Twilight waved her hoof casually. "Oh, you don't have to worry about that. The tensor field equations still need some fine tuning, but I can use my Element to sense if any of the others are still in harmony with their Elements. If they are, we'll know they aren't impostors."
Thunderball looked at Twilight thoughtfully. "Seems reasonable. Can I see how it works?"
"Certainly!" Twilight's horn glowed as she summoned the tiara bearing the Element of Magic. She held it close to Rainbow Dash, and it briefly pulsed deep purple. "It doesn't technically have to flash visibly. So long as it's connected to me I can feel it without much trouble."
"Cool! I didn't know they could do that! Does mine come with any special features?"
Twilight scratched her chin. "I don't know. Do you think you can stick around for me to run some tests?"
"Nah, it's almost time for my shift. Maybe later, Twi. Hey, thanks for letting me stay over and everything."
"Not a problem, Rainbow. See you later!" Twilight hugged her friend before Rainbow Dash flew out the window and up into the sky.
Twilight donned the tiara and walked towards the door. "Well, it looks like we've all got a busy day today. Come on, Lieutenant; let me introduce you to my friends."
The bright morning sun bathed the streets of Ponyville with light, which allowed Thunderball to catch his first proper glimpse of the town. Its thatched cottages and dirt streets lacked the architectural pedigree of Canterlot, with its prominent stone architecture, or of newer cities like Manehattan, built of steel and concrete. Still, it had a certain rustic charm about it and a friendly atmosphere.
Yet beneath the surface lurked a cancer far more deadly than any Equestria had faced before. Even the great wars, such as the Lunar Rebellion and the Griffon Invasion were open conflicts whose participants could be identified and attacked. Changelings were amorphous, insidious foes who required more intensive measures.
At the same time, the strong emphasis Celestia had placed on harmony for the past thousand years had turned Equestria into a country where those measures would never be taken, save for the gravest of circumstances. It was easy to justify scanning soldiers and government employees for signs of replacement or mind control, but everypony went home to friends and family, who could not be investigated so thoroughly. They had their rights, even if changelings had proven their ability to impersonate loved ones and close friends.
The delicious scent of baked bread and sweet frosting wafted through the air, heralding their approach to Sugarcube Corner. If Twilight found a changeling, there was no telling what could happen; the bug could be wired to explode with a deadmare switch, or resort to taking hostages from the long line of patrons leading out of the shop. He took in a deep breath and prepared himself for the worst as Twilight walked through the door.
"Twilight!" Pinkie Pie jumped over the counter to meet her friend as Twilight stepped into the shop. "How've you been? It's been forever since we've seen each other! And who's your friend? I know everypony in Ponyville, but I haven't seen him before so he must be new! I love it when a new pony comes into town, because that means I can make a new friend, and I'm friends with everypony! Hey mister, want to be friends?"
Twilights shook her head. "Pinkie, it's been two days. And this is Thunderball. He's a guest of mine."
"Wow, that's great! Let me be the first to say 'hi' and give you a big Ponyville welcome!" Pinkie promptly pulled out her party cannon from...somewhere and fired it, covering him in confetti. He stared at the pink pony and blinked slowly, unsure of how to react.
"Hey! So, you want some cupcakes? They're so moist and delicious! Everypony's getting one!"
The prospect of baked goods was enough to kick Thunderball's brain back into gear. "I wouldn't mind a few." His comment was immediately followed by numerous complaints from the crowd. "Although the other customers might object to me cutting in line. Maybe I should come by later."
"Okie–dokie–lokie!" Pinkie leaped over the counter once again and quickly began serving ponies. "Bye you two! Enjoy the rest of your fanfic — I mean, day!"
"So, changeling?" Thunderball asked as they walked into the street, certain that it was the only explanation for the pony's bizarre behavior.
"No, Pinkie. She's the Element of Laughter, after all."
'I wasn't aware that laughter equaled insanity,' Thunderball thought to himself. Pinkie Pie was certainly an eccentric pony, but she might prove useful. After all, she mentioned that she knew everypony in town; even if it was an exaggeration, she could help point out newcomers, unusual citizens, or other suspicious activity. Then again, she did seem a little…unfocused.
Thunderball came to an abrupt stop in front of the Carousel Boutique as Twilight knocked on the door.
"Twilight! Oh do come in,darling," a cultured voice inside beckoned. They stepped inside to see Rarity casually tearing the stitching out of a dress. "How have you been lately? I'm sorry I haven't visited, but I've been so preoccupied with these orders for the Gala!"
"I'm glad to hear business is going so well, Rarity!" Twilight pulled out the Element of Magic and placed it on her head. "I was hoping to get your opinion on something very important; do you think the Element of Harmony goes well with my royal attire?"
"Oh, I'm so glad you asked," Rarity gushed as she then began appraising Twilight's clothing to the exclusion of everything else. Thunderball quietly waited the conversation out in a corner. A sharp hiss caught his attention, and he looked down to see a fluffy white cat batting her paws at him in a threatening manner. He did his best to ignore it until the cat scratched his legs.
Thunderball walked over to the nearest set of curtains and began rubbing his mane along it until his hairs stood up on end. He then walked over to the cat and waited for it to scratch him again. The instant the cat's claws touched his skin, a powerful jolt of electricity leaped off of him and into the cat. Its white fur puffed up with static to the point where it resembled a balloon, and it drifted off towards the ceiling with an alarmed yowl.
"Opalescence! Oh heavens, what happened?" Rarity covered her mouth with her hooves and gasped as she grabbed Opal with her telekinesis.
"Sorry, ma'am. Static electricity." Thunderball said with a painfully straight face. Twilight gave him a suspicious look, but made no comment.
"Well no wonder!" Rarity gasped, scandalized. "Your mane is simply awful! You must start using a conditioner, and I insist that you switch barbers. The last one butchered your hair! And your hooves!" She grabbed his right forehoof and brought it up for a closer look. "Who in the Principality of Equestria thought it would be a good idea to nail horseshoes onto you?"
Thunderball was not sure what to make of her fussing; it almost seemed as if she was completely unacquainted with the concept of military dress. "The Special Air Service?"
"Oh, I didn't know you were a servicepony," Rarity said in a completely different tone of voice, one that was uncomfortably seductive. "Can I help you with anything? Perhaps you'd be interested in a hoof–stitched dress suit for the next ball you are invited to, one made of the finest materials in Equestria to display your many, many medals?"
Rarity whipped out a measuring tape and began taking Thunderball's measurements by hoof, squeezing him uncomfortably tight in certain parts of his anatomy. "And I suppose you'll want to take some special pony with you to the next ball, hm? You know, I have a dress that will look marvelous when paired with your suit. We'll be the center of attention, you and I."
Thunderball opened his mouth to protest, but Rarity talked right over him.
"I bet it'll be so exciting, staying at your penthouse suite overlooking some villainous pony like Goldhoof or Bad Horse!" Rarity gushed, completely ignoring Thunderball's obvious irritation.
"I think you've been reading too many Tom Prancy novels, ma'am," he finally managed to say.
"Oh, we simply must specify that the room have a full–sized hot tub." She sidled up to him with inappropriately heavy–lidded eyes. "I've always wanted to spend quality time with a proper stallion."
Thunderball shot Twilight a look that said, quite plainly, that he was requesting immediate extraction from a hazardous situation. When no help was forthcoming due to Twilight exerting most of her willpower to keep from bursting into laughter at the horrified expression on his face, he decided that it was time to take matters into his own hooves. This called for drastic measures.
"I'm gay."
Twilight and Rarity stared at him.
"Really?" Twilight raised an eyebrow. "I could have sworn I saw you at the Gala with—"
"I'm. Gay," Thunderball declared, with an air of finality about the subject.
Twilight pretended to be shocked. "Oh my. I had no idea."
"You never asked."
"Well, strictly speaking, that would have been illegal."
Thunderball glanced at Rarity to see if she had taken the bait. While Twilight's acting was unlikely to win any awards, it seemed like enough to convince Rarity, who looked downcast for a moment before brightening up again.
"You know, I hear Goldengrape has just broken up with his coltfriend..."
Twilight grinned wickedly as she stepped out of the Carousel Boutique. "So I hear you have a hot date later this week."
"Thank you, Your Highness." Thunderball came out from behind her with a scroll bearing Goldengrape's contact information in his mouth, which was discretely deposited into a nearby trashcan. "The Equestrian army appreciates your open–mindedness and commitment to the issue of LGBT rights."
Twilight giggled and skipped towards the town market, where she spotted a beautiful yellow pegasus with a basket under one wing and a money pouch under the other. She walked past them serenely until Twilight called her name, causing her jump straight up into the air and drop both of her possessions.
"Hey Fluttershy!" Twilight said as she gathered the pouch and basket for her friend. "I have somepony I want you to meet. Thunderball's a royal agent Celestia sent to watch over my personal safety while we make sure Ponyville is safe from changelings," she whispered. "I've been showing him around Ponyville all morning and introducing him to my friends."
Thunderball narrowed his eyes as he recognized her. "...I remember you from the Gala."
Fluttershy blushed as red as Big Mac as she babbled almost incoherently. "Oh! Oh my, I...I...Were you there? I'm sorry, I really didn't mean to upset the animals. It was just...I hadn't seen them before and they were all so...!"
Twilight's tail twitched. "Fluttershy—"
The pegasus paled under her fur. "Please tell me Celestia isn't secretly angry at me for that! She won't banish me, will she?"
"Fluttershy..."
Fluttershy began to hyperventilate. "Oh no! What about the moon? What if she decides to send me there? I can't live on the moon for a thousand years! I can't! There's no air on the moon!"
"Fluttershy!"
Fluttershy’s coat turned a deep crimson as she realized what a spectacle she had made of herself. "Oh! Um...Yes, Twilight?"
"What are you up to today?"
"I...I'm buying food for the animals," she murmured as she blushed again. "W–Would you like to accompany me there? Applejack's set up a stall today; maybe you can introduce Thunderball to her as well?"
Twilight sighed happily seeing that her friend was back to normal. "Sure, Fluttershy!"
The two mares moved next to each other and began talking, which gave Thunderball a chance to think by himself. So far, it seemed that Ponyville was fairly secure despite the presence of changelings, but that just meant that their plan had not yet come to fruition. What were they up to? Assassination or kidnapping seemed unlikely, given that they had had ample opportunity for months. Whatever it was, it was likely a great deal more sinister and subversive. At an educated guess, based on what he himself would do if put in charge of a cell of changelings, they would—
Thunderball collided with something soft and cream–colored, which squeaked as it fell to the ground.
"Thunderball?" An earth pony mare stared at him in shock from the ground.
He immediately reached for her foreleg and pulled her up. "I'm so sorry! I didn't see you — Wait, do I know you?"
She looked down and pawed at the ground nervously. "We, uh, met in Canterlot last year..."
"Oh Celestia...Not the Grand Galloping Gala?" Thunderball cringed at the recollection of the worst Gala in years. While Princess Twilight’s friends had ruined most of it, but he himself was far from blameless. "I didn't make an ass out of myself or anything, did I? I swear, I've got some kind of a drinking problem."
"No, no, we just talked," she laughed skittishly as she backed away from him. "Well, um, it was nice running into you again! See you around!"
The mare dashed off before he could respond, and he kicked himself mentally for not getting her name. At least he had seen her cutie mark; three blue and yellow striped pieces of candy. He would probably be able to find her if he asked Pinkie Pie. It would only be polite to send her something to apologize for his behavior last year — whatever it was. Judging by her attitude, it had been pretty bad; perhaps a baker's dozen of cupcakes would be appropriate.
Thunderball saw that he had fallen far behind his royal charge and trotted up to Twilight as a brisk pace. "There are certainly a lot of strange ponies here, Your Highness."
Twilight shot him a look of exasperation. "Can you please dispense with the formalities and just call me 'Twilight,' like everypony else?"
"Yes, Your Highness." Twilight could have sworn she saw Thunderball's cheek muscles twitch as he subverted the request.
The three walked into the town market, which was bustling with activity. Fluttershy made a beeline for a well–built wooden stand that had obviously been there for years. The stall was filled with baskets and barrels overflowing with apples, but the proprietor was nowhere in sight.
Undeterred by the lack of management, Fluttershy set her basket down on the ground and peered over the counter. "Hello, Applejack. Can I have some apples?"
A tall cowpony hat poked up from beneath the counter, followed by an orange earth pony with a basket of apples in her mouth.
"Sure thing, Sugarcube." Applejack gently emptied the contents of her basket into Fluttershy's. "Here you go!"
"Thank you, Applejack. I hope you have lots of sales today! See you later!" Fluttershy waved to her friends and then wandered off in search of more food.
Thunderball licked his lips as he approached the stall. The shining red and green fruits smelled amazing. "How much do they cost?"
"Depends on the cultivar. Why, we got all sorts here; why don't you browse around and see what you like? Take a free sample if you want; there's plenty more where those came from."
Applejack tossed an Ambrosia apple at Thunderball, who caught it in his mouth and crunched into it with one bite. The crisp fruit released an explosion of juice and flavor in his mouth. Thunderball closed his eyes and savored the tasty treat.
Applejack winked slyly at Twilight. "Friend of yours, Twi?"
Twilight rolled her eyes at the implication. "It's not like that. His name is Lieutenant Thunderball. Celestia sent him to look over security in Ponyville."
"Can't say I meet many ponies named 'Lieutenant' round these parts — is that a Canterlot thing?" Applejack smirked, to Thunderball's amusement and Twilight's mild irritation.. "Well, Lieutenant, how long's the inspection supposed to take?"
Thunderball quickly chomped down on the apple core and swallowed. "It could be a while, actually. There’s no telling."
Applejack’s face lit up with excitement. "Well then, why don't I show ya some Ponyville hospitality and invite you and Twilight to dinner at Sweet Apple Acres?"
"It's not going to involve confetti, is it?" he asked apprehensively.
Applejack gave him a knowing look. "Ah, so you've met Pinkie. No, it's just going to involve a lot of apples. And Apples."
Thunderball cautiously looked over at Twilight for permission to accept the offer. "We wouldn't be troubling you, would we?"
Applejack smiled from ear to ear. "No sirree. It's always great to have guests over. Why, Twilight and I ain't had a chance to catch up in a whole stack of blue moons."
"Ponies keep telling me that; I guess I've been spending more time with my royal duties than I thought," Twilight chuckled. "Applejack, it would be my honor to have dinner at Sweet Apple Acres tonight."
Thunderball licked his lips at the thought of more apples. "Me as well, ma'am."
Applejack let out a whooping cheer at the news. "Well, if that ain't the best thing I've heard all day. Come by at around six and I can promise you the best apples this side of Canterlot!"
Twilight leaned over the counter and hugged her friend. "We're looking forward to it. Take care in the meantime!"
"That goes for you too, Sugarcube. And you, Thunderball."
Thunderball bowed his head politely. "Yes, ma'am. I will."
"Well, looks like you're fitting right in," Twilight commented as the two walked away from Applejack's booth.
"Your friends certainly seem quite...enthusiastic. Did they welcome you the same way when you first arrived?"
"You have no idea. AJ made me eat through a bushel of apples, and Pinkie threw me a surprise party in the library, among other things. Of course, back then I was too wrapped up in my studies to appreciate the gestures of friendship they were offering me, but then we teamed up to stop Nightmare Moon, and we've been friends ever since."
"That sounds very touching. Certainly better than how I spent the Summer Sun Festival night — stuck in the barracks because Nightmare Moon had magically imprisoned us there. Longest night of my life; I thought Princess Celestia would never come back."
"Yeah, it wasn't the best night, but so much good came out of it. I found my friends, Celestia and Luna were reunited, and you..." Twilight trailed off uncertainly.
"Avoided the night flying session and got a three day weekend out of it?"
"Sounds like a win to me!"
"Well, I guess being stuck with the guys wasn't so bad either. We had a great game of cards that night. Pity I haven't seen them since I transferred into the SIS."
Twilight looked contemplatively into the distance. "Would you say you have a lot of friends, Thunderball?"
He frowned at the question. "I have enough for my purposes. I'm usually busy with work."
"Hm." Twilight furrowed her brow as if deep in thought, and Thunderball felt a shiver run up his spine. "You know, I have some princess business to attend to before dinner. Why don't you take the afternoon off?"
"...Are you sure about this, Your Highness?"
Twilight looked him straight in the eyes with as much royal authority as she could muster. "Do I need to make that an order?"
"...No, Your Highness. Enjoy your afternoon."
"You too, Thunderball. See you at Sweet Apple Acres!"
Twilight teleported away with a flash of magic, leaving Thunderball alone in the town square. The pegasus sighed at the unsubtle attempt to encourage him to have a social life. For an agent like himself, work would always come first. Friendship was, at best, a pleasant distraction, and at worst, a liability. Of course, things had been different when he was with the SAS, but it had been over a year since he had been recruited by military intelligence, and when the spooks came knocking, refusal was out of the question.
His time with the army was in the past; he had to focus on the present, and that meant looking for changelings in Ponyville. Simply picking one out of the crowd would be too much to ask for, so he decided to simply walk around town and observe the citizens for suspicious activity. Most ponies he saw seemed to just be going about their day, although he gradually became aware of a large draft horse with a caramel–colored coat, dark brown mane, and three blue horseshoes on his flank was following him.
He spun around to face his shadow, hooves tensed and ready for a fight. "Can I help you?"
The draft horse towered over Thunderball and spoke in a deep baritone. "Excuse me, my name's Creme Brulee."
Thunderball regarded the horse with no small amount of suspicion. "...Nice to meet you. I'm Thunderball."
Creme Brulee frowned at him. "I know. I heard you're going out with Goldengrape now."
"What?" Exactly how many ponies had Rarity spoken to in the hour since he had left the Carousel Boutique? If the wrong ponies heard her talking, he would be out of a job before dinner.
Creme Brulee patiently waited for Thunderball to recover before continuing on. "I just want you to know that I have nothing against you, and I respect Goldengrape's right to date whoever he wants."
Thunderball tried to speak, but his voice came out very strained. "That's great, however—"
"I just don't want him to get hurt by going off into a rebound relationship!" Creme Brulee flicked his tail in frustration. "You understand, don't you?"
"I know, but I'm—"
Creme Brulee stamped the ground hard enough to leave dents in the dirt pathway. "I just don't know where we went wrong! It's been so hard relating to him lately, like he's an entirely different pony now!"
"That can happen, but you don't need to worry because—"
"I know they say true love will win out in the end, but what if we were never in love in the first place?" Creme Brulee began pacing the ground frantically. "When I first met him, I thought he was my special somepony, but maybe I was just fooling myself. Oh Celestia, I need a drink!"
Creme Brulee dashed off towards the nearest bar, leaving a very confused Thunderball wondering if Goldengrape was a changeling or, more likely, going through a rough period in his love life. Changelings did not get into lover's quarrels — ponies were a food source, not love interests. From Thunderball's experience, changelings would either maintain the relationship to leech nourishment, or mentally dominate their victim.
So at least two members of the civilian population could be discounted from the list of potential suspects. That only left slightly under three thousand ponies to investigate. At this rate, he would be done in time for retirement.
Warm rays of sunshine covered the park that afternoon, and there were no shortage of ponies taking advantage of the weather. The laughter of children playing games drifted through the air, as did the relaxed conversation of their parents. Picnics had sprung up around the park at random, filling the air with the fragrance of wholesome homemade cooking.
Ponyville had many qualities that made it an ideal site for infiltration. The population was large enough that a newcomer could easily blend in, unlike the frontier towns of Appeloosa and Dodge Junction. At the same time, it lacked the bureaucracy that came with a city like Manehatten or Van Hoofer. A pony did not need much in the way of official documentation or paperwork to live in Ponyville — supposedly, there was even a zebra who set up shop in the Everfree Forest without any official permission whatsoever.
Of course, Ponyville's greatest asset was its location, within striking distance of Canterlot. Thunderball shuddered at the mental image of another attack on the capital, this time done in quietly in the dead of night. Chrysalis might have had a terrible plan the first time, but loss and wounded pride were a strong motivator to improve one's abilities, especially when vengeance was thrown into the mix.
If the situations were reversed, Thunderball would have had no issue sneaking into Chrysalis's lair and planting a stiletto in her black heart.
Thunderball craned his head up and gazed into the sky above, with a faint smile on his face. The Wonderbolts were flying above them, leading a group of trainees. A rainbow contrail stood out among the group, and Thunderball knew exactly who it belonged to. The sound of enthusiastic cheering filled the air as they passed overhead; a quick glance over his shoulder revealed a crowd of schoolfillies (and a hoof–full of colts) pointing at the sky.
"Isn't Rainbow Dash the awesomest?" an organge pegasus filly cheered. "She'll become a Wonderbolt for sure!"
A unicorn colt unfurled a rainbow–colored flag and began waving it in hopes of catching Rainbow’s attention. "Yeah, Scootaloo! Nopony can fly as fast as her!"
Thunderball rolled his eyes. It was like Rainbow Dash had her own fan club.
"Look, she's coming this way!" somepony shouted as the prismatic streak made a beeline for their location, followed shortly by the arrival of Rainbow Dash.
Rainbow Dash flew a few loops around the park for the benefit of her cheering fans before she swooped down and picked up Scootaloo. "And how's my number one fan doing?"
Scootaloo hugged Rainbow as if her life depended on it. "Super! I just love watching you fly around!"
Rainbow ruffled Scootaloo’s mane affectionately. "Scootaloo, I've got to take you flying up there with the Wonderbolts one of these days. Let you spread out your wings and see what it's like for yourself."
"Yeah! Then maybe I'll finally get my cutie mark in flying!"
"Don't pigeonhole yourself, kid. You could get it in racing, stunts, weather control, or..." Rainbow Dash trailed off as she caught sight of Thunderball and grinned mischievously. "Hey Scoots, follow me."
Thunderball looked apprehensive as the two drew near. "Can I help you?"
"Thunderball, meet Scootaloo. She's been trying to get her cutie mark with her friends Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle." Rainbow gestured to a yellow earth pony and a white unicorn back with the rest of the fillies. "I thought it'd be good for her to talk to more ponies and see if she can find her special talent. Scootaloo, this is Thunderball. He's a secret agent from Canterlot!"
Scootaloo's eyes widened in awe. "Oh wow! You mean like Roger Maare?"
Thunderball smiled at Scootallo and promptly pulled Rainbow Dash aside. "Could you please not spread that around? You know, in case the enemy’s around? The bugs that can impersonate anypony you know and love?"
Rainbow waved her hoof dismissively. "Aw, stop worrying. Scoots here isn't a changeling."
"Nope! I'm just a pegasus!" Scootaloo added helpfully. "And a Cutie Mark Crusader, and president of the Rainbow Dash fan club!"
Thunderball stared at Rainbow Dash incredulously. "You have your own fan club?"
Rainbow Dash turned around to look over the fan club. "Yeah, it's pretty awesome, but I've been told it's not healthy for my ego to get so much attention, so why don't you take the spotlight?"
The rest of the fan club had gathered around Thunderball, and he looked at them uncomfortably. Soldiers in his position did not make a habit of talking about their careers. "Oh, well, I started out in the 101st Airborne Infantry Division...Wow, it must have been eleven years ago. We trained to fly quickly over long distances in order to deliver reinforcements, ambush enemy forces, and attack vulnerable points in their supply chain or defenses."
He noticed that Scootaloo was hanging onto his every word, as were her friends. Even Rainbow Dash was listening attentively — he suspected she was using the kids to get him to talk more about his past. It was a sneaky, underhanded move that was, unfortunately, working.
"Being accepted into an airborne division is hard work; not only do you have to be a great flier, but you have to kick flank at hoof to hoof combat as well. Since we fly out to battle, we usually can't carry heavy equipment, and we fight as light infantry when we land. That means we usually end up facing enemies who are not only better equipped than us, but better positioned as well. Our only advantages are the element of surprise, superior mobility, and our ability to improvise."
"After a few years, I was recruited into the 21st Special Air Service regiment. They perform unconventional military operations like infiltration, sabotage, reconnaissance behind enemy lines — things regular soldiers aren't trained to do. The SAS takes only the best; you need three and a half years of service before they'll even think about accepting you, and two years of training before you can be deployed. A special forces operator can be called upon to perform anything from aerial combat to underwater demolitions, and must therefore be well–versed in every aspect of warfare. He may have his squad killed or incapacitated, so he must be able to act alone as well as in a group. He may be sent into unknown situations adapt to rapidly changing circumstances. He may become trapped behind enemy lines, so he must be able to act independently without orders."
"Wow, that sounds so cool!" Scootaloo jumped in the air excitedly, her wings buzzing as she did so. They managed to keep her afloat in the air briefly each time she jumped, but it was clear that she could not actually fly with them. "Did you like it?"
Thunderball decided it was, perhaps, best to avoid mentioning that you joined the army to fight and die for Equestria, and that the army would do its best to send you to places where you could fight and die for Equestria. Scootaloo was too young for that much cynicism. "It's a lot less glamorous when you're dragging a hundred pounds of equipment through the air, or swimming for two hours through freezing cold water to land on a muddy beach in the middle of winter. Plus, they'll shave your mane and dock your tail."
Scootaloo looked aghast and clutched her tail. "You mean they cut it off?"
"Oh, no. No no no. They just cut it real short, see?" He flicked his tail around to show her that it was still in one piece.
Applebloom looked at Thunderball’s tail closely. "It’s just like how Big Mac's tail is, Scootaloo. He had to crop it so it wouldn't get caught in any of the farming equipment."
"Well, that's not so bad," Scootaloo concluded once she had been assured that the army would not mutilate her. "I could live with that if I got to do all those cool things!"
Sweetie Bell pointed at the green ball of electricity on Thunderball’s flank. "So how'd you get your cutie mark? Doesn't look like it has to do much with being a soldier."
Thunderball looked at his cutie mark fondly. "Well, it has to do with how I fly, but I don't know if I can show you around here."
"Please, you're a pegasus." Rainbow Dash launched herself into the air and flew circles around him. "Just fly up there and dazzle us."
Thunderball caught her by the tail and pulled her down. "You know, I really don't think I have clearance for that sort of thing. Looks like the Wonderbolts reserved the sky for their training, which is still going on, judging by how your coach is making the slower fliers do extra laps."
"Come on, they won't mind. Sky's big enough for all of us." Rainbow stretched out her wings and pointed herself up at the sky. "I'll race ya; first back from that bunny–shaped cloud is the winner."
"Yeah!" A lavender unicorn filly stepped out from the crowd. "My mom told me how awesome you were! Can't you show us what you do?"
Her golden eyes shone with excitement and Thunderball could not help but notice their remarkable resemblance to those of the mailmare he had met earlier, though they both actually managed to point in the same direction. "You wouldn't happen to be Miss Doo's daughter, would you?"
Shen odded proudly. "Yup! Name's Dinky Doo! I'm secretary of the fan club!"
Thunderball closed his eyes for a long minute and contemplated the choice before him. Showing off was unprofessional conduct at the best of times for an agent, but he did not want to disappoint the children, either. Especially not the blank flanks. Who knew, he might just inspire them to find their special talents.
Hopefully, they would turn out better than Private Cold Snap, whom Thunderball had found after a battle during the Saddle Arabian Succession Crisis surrounded by corpses of the enemy, with the mark of an equine skull laid out above two spears on his flank. It had taken a lot of counseling to help Cold Snap get over the fact that his special talent was either combat or killing ponies (nopony was willing to test and figure out which one), though last Thunderball heard, Cold Snap was doing fine in the Night Guard. It probably helped that the only ponies he would ever have to kill would be ones who really deserved it.
"We are only going to do this once. No exceptions."
Rainbow Dash rubbed her hooves together. "Muhuhaha! Exactly as planned! Hey Scoots, gimme a countdown!"
Apple Bloom rolled her eyes. "You can just start at three, you know."
The suggestion earned her a dirty look from Scootaloo. "...Three! Two! One!"
Rainbow Dash and Thunderball kicked off at the exact same moment, leaving the children behind in a cloud of dust. Thunderball's wings were in fantastic shape, but even so there was no keeping up with a dedicated flier like Rainbow Dash. She easily outpaced him and reached the cloud, where she sat down and waved at him.
Thunderball ground his teeth in irritation and rushed forward, only to see Rainbow Dash dive off and soar past him. He reached the cloud and looked down to see her floating down lazily with her hooves behind her head. Thunderball growled and kicked off the cloud with his rear hooves. The cloud exploded with electricity, which propelled him downwards at a blistering pace. Thunderball tucked his limbs in as he did so in a dive–bombing maneuver designed to reduce drag on his body and increase his velocity.
He shot towards the ground like a bullet until he was even with Rainbow Dash, who saluted him before power diving herself, leaving him behind in her rainbow–colored wake. Thunderball pushed his wings to the limit to try and catch up. The wind rushed through his mane and coat, which stood on end as sparks began to fly off of him. The static charge built up to the point where electricity enveloped his body and left a crackling trail behind him. He kicked back with his legs and unleashed another burst of lightning from his rear hooves in an attempt to propel himself past Rainbow Dash. The extra speed, impressive as it was, was not enough to overcome Rainbow's lead; there was simply not enough room left to catch up. Rainbow Dash reached the ground ahead of him and claimed victory, much to the delight of Scootaloo.
Thunderball banked left at the last minute so that he could land on the park's dirt trail. The electric field around him discharged into the ground with the force of a small explosion. Dust filled the air, followed shortly by the smell of ozone. It slowly dissipated to reveal Thunderball standing in a small crater of his own creation, panting heavily from the exertion.
"Wow! You got second place, but I still think that was awesome!" Scootaloo hopped into the crater and examined the burned soil. "How'd you do that?"
"My hair...builds up a static...charge really easily," Thunderball said between desperate gasps for air, as his mane slowly settled down. "It's terrible in winter. I turn into a walking Tesla coil."
"So what you're saying is that you got your cutie mark for being a shock trooper?" Rainbow chuckled. "Well, that's pretty cool. You're not as awesome as me, but I can definitely see why the SAS wanted you. I bet if you ever landed on somebody like that, there wouldn't be anything left except cinders. Could your friends do that too?"
Thunderball froze in place. Rainbow blinked before slowly waving her hoof in front of his face. "Uh, hello?
"No," Thunderball said flatly, before abruptly changing the subject. "Well, Scootaloo, if you ever want to try out for an airborne division, you know what to do. Fly fast, drop hard."
"I am totally going to try that when I fly!"
Rainbow ruffled Scootaloo's mane affectionately. "Why wait? Come on squirt, I'll take you for a ride right now."
She picked up the pegasus filly and zoomed up into the air before diving back down again at breakneck speed. They landed right where they had taken off; Rainbow Dash looked no worse for the wear, but Scootaloo's eyes were wide open and her body was shivering.
"D–Did I g–get my c–c–cutie mark?" she asked through chattering teeth.
Sweetie Belle shook her head. "Better luck next time."
Thunderball helped Scootaloo off of Rainbow’s back. "Give it some time. I didn't get my cutie mark until my first free–falling drop. Never flew fast enough to generate a static charge until that day, and I was an adult."
Scootaloo perked up immediately upon hearing his story. "You mean somepony as awesome as you went through your entire childhood without a cutie mark?"
"Yeah. Even though I spent the better part of my foalhood trying to get one, I had never joined the army — how could I if I was just a kid? But it turned out the army was my calling."
Scootaloo hopped around her friends excitedly. "So maybe I just need to be older! Aww,I wish I wasn't so young! Being young sucks."
Rainbow laughed and picked Scootaloo up before she could run into somepony. "Don't worry so much kid, You'll grow out of it."
Thunderball sat back down on the park bench, content to watch the antics of Rainbow Dash and her fan club. They looked so happy and content together; his SAS team had clustered around their commanding officer, Major Goldeneye, the same way. A faint smile graced Thunderball's lips as he remembered some of his fellow soldiers. Moonraker was like a little brother, Icebreaker had the most infectious cheerfulness of anypony he had ever met, and Skyfall…
A memory of the blond haired blue eyed, white pegasus — who could have easily stepped out of a Royal Guard recruitment poster — flashed through Thunderball's mind. Skyfall had been with him ever since the day they both enlisted in the army. He was, in many ways, the brother Thunderball never had, closer than the family he had sought to escape. When ponies spoke in reverent tones about the bonds of camaraderie that soldiers developed with one another, Thunderball thought of Skyfall.
"Hey Apple Bloom! Time to head on home!" a familiar voice called. Thunderball turned his head to see Applejack walking into the park. "Well, lookie here! Fancy meeting you again, Thunderball."
"Princess Twilight gave me the afternoon off, so I thought I'd spend it in the park, relaxing," Thunderball replied politely. "Not that I got much of that done with Rainbow Dash around, but I tried."
Rainbow ruffled her feathers in mock outrage. "Come on, I know you enjoyed that race as much as I did, Ok, maybe not as much as I did, but I saw you smiling."
Thunderball quickly turned his back to her. "I did no such thing."
Applejack walked around Thunderball so she could come face to face with Rainbow Dash. "So RD, how about you join us for dinner? I bet you could eat like a horse after all that!"
"Ooh! What'll we be having, apples?" Rainbow licked her lips. "Can I count on some pie?"
Scootaloo tugged on Rainbow’s feathers to get her attention. "But Rainbow Dash! You said you'd spend the evening with me!"
Applejack gave Scootaloo a pat on the head. "Aw, don't you fret, Scootaloo. You and Sweetie Belle are invited too. The more the merrier, right?"
The sound of the fillies cheering just barely drowned out the dull clunk of Thunderball's ironclad hooves hitting his forehead.
Sweet Apple Acres was in full bloom that week, and apples were piled high as far as Thunderball could see. A long picnic table had been laid out in front of the barn, and it was covered in a mouthwatering collection of apple–themed dishes. An old mare and a younger stallion were putting the finishing touches on the table when Applejack and the others arrived.
To Thunderball's surprise, Twilight waved at them as if they were good friends. "Granny Smith, Big Mac, it's good to see you!"
Granny Smith curtsied the best she could despite her old age. "It’s an honor, Your Highness."
Big Mac nodded from behind her. "Eeyup."
"Oh, don't you start too," Twilight groaned, shooting at glance at Thunderball. "I've had about enough of that today."
Granny Smith smiled kindly at Twilight. "Oh, I'm sorry dear. It's just an old habit. Come here, why don't y'all have a seat and have yourselves some pie?"
Thunderball took a seat a respectful distance from the princess, which put him next to Big Mac and, unfortunately, Rainbow Dash. He turned to the workhorse next to him and quickly started a conversation to avoid more probing questions about his past.
"So, you work on the farm?"
Big Mac regarded him lethargically. "Eeyup."
A quick look around for something to talk about revealed nothing but apples as far as the eye could see. "How's the apple business this season? Looks like you've had a good harvest."
"Eeyup,"
Thunderball wondered if the stallion was pulling his leg, or if Big Mac was really that stoic. "Don't talk much, do you?"
"Eenope."
One of the many things Thunderball had learned from the dreadful Canterlot parties he had attended was that if conversation was going to be a dead end, there was always food. At least the apple pie was good. In fact, it tasted better than anything he had eaten in Canterlot. The apples had just the right mixture of sweetness and tartness, and the crust was soft and perfectly flaky.
"I heard that you were in the army."
Thunderball blinked in surprise when he realized that Big Mac had spoken a complete sentence. "I was. Technically, still am. Just permanently temporarily borrowed by intelligence."
"My pa was in the army. 3rd Equestrian Rangers battalion." The wording implied that Big Mac's father was no longer in the army; the tone implied that his father was no longer living. "I thought about joining when I was a colt, but then I had to take care of the farm."
Thunderball remembered how it felt to have his dream of being a Wonderbolt crushed by the rejection letter, though he could not imagine how the death of a father felt. He had always been distant with his parents. "Do you regret it?"
Big Mac swept his gaze over Sweet Apple Acres and gave a cotent sigh. "Eenope."
The strength and honesty in Big Mac’s voice brought an unexpected smile to Thunderball’s lips. "It's good to have someplace where you belong."
"Eeyup." Big Mac reached out for a mug of cider and raised it in a toast. Thunderball followed suit and discovered that it was hard cider. He nearly spat it out for fear of drinking while on duty, but he did not want to seem rude. As he wrestled with indecision, he noticed that Princess Twilight had already downed two mugs herself, and did not seem like she would be terribly concerned.
Thunderball raised the mug and opened his mouth. One mug could not possibly hurt.
Two hours later...
"...sho everypony hoofed their spearsh to me at the mess hall, and then, the shargeant walks over and asksh me how many spearsh are under my possession. Now, I had an entire platoon'sh worth of spearsh at that point and no idea how many poniesh were in the platoon, but I sure as hell knew the shargeant knew and that made guessing dangerous. Sho I stood straight up, looked him in the eye, and said 'All of them, shargeant!' Next thing I knew everypony was laughing, and even the shargeant was chuckling as he walked pasht me to get his lunch."
Thunderball smiled drunkenly as his audience howled in laughter at the story. He finished off yet another mug of cider and could not remember for the life of him why he had thought drinking was a bad idea. The only problem it had caused so far was filling his bladder. He politely excused himself from the table and made for the outhouse, but was quickly stopped by Applejack.
"Hey Sugarcube, you sure you want to leave now? The baked Alaska's being served, and you best eat it when it's hot."
Thunderball looked intrigued. "What's an Alashka?"
"I think — hic — it's a kind of topping," Twilight slurred with authority. "I would know — hic — because I am a princess."
Applejack scratched her head. "I always thought it was a kind of ice cream."
"Or a zucchini!" Pinkie added. "I always get those two confused."
Thunderball jumped half a hoof in the air and landed hard on the bench as he realized Pinkie had suddenly appeared next to him. "Pinkie! Where'd you come from?"
She ignored the question by shoving a box into his hooves. "It's later! Here're your cupcakes! That'll be four bits, please."
Thunderball was too bewildered to ask how she had known what he wanted and just handed over the money.
"Hope you enjoy them! Bye everypony!" Pinkie left as suddenly as she came; the only evidence that the encounter had actually happened was the box of cupcakes in Thunderball's hooves and his slightly lighter wallet.
Rainbow Dash eyed them and licked her lips. "What're the cupcakes for?"
Thunderball placed a hoof over the box and held them to his chest possessively. "They're an apology to a pony I ran into today. I knocked her over and forgot her name even though we met lasht year at the Gala."
Rainbow waggled her eyebrows suggestively. "Oh! You’re a regular Cassanova, you sly dog. What’s the poor mare’s name?"
Thunderball shook his head. "All I remember is that she's cream colored and has three candiesh for a cutie mark."
Rainbow tapped the bench thoughtfully. "Huh. You know, that sounds like Bon Bon."
"Can you point her out to me shome time?"
Rainbow gave him a coy smile. "Alright, but don't get your hopes up. She's Lyra's marefriend."
Applejack looked puzzled. "Marefriend? You mean, you can do that?"
"Oh yes," Twilight said brightly. "But that won't — hic — be a problem. As a matter of — hic — fact, Thunderball's going on a date with Goldengrape."
The statement made Applejack more confused than before. "Wait, but isn't Goldengrape a stallion? How would they...?"
Thunderball blanched and facehoofed again. "That was a misunderstanding with Rarity."
Twilight giggled as she lifted an empty mug with her telekinesis and tried to drink from it. "Come on, lighten up, It was funny."
"With all due respect—" Thunderball caught himself mid–sentence and quickly gobbled down a mouthful of delicious baked Alaska. When he looked up from his plate, he saw Twilight staring at him the best she could while swaying in her seat.
"What were you — hic — going to say?"
He suddenly found himself sobering remarkably quickly. "Never mind, Your Highness."
"Come on, out with it." Twilight leaned in so close that he could smell the cider on her breath.
"I'd rather not..."
"Saaaaay it." Twilight shot him a look that carried the full weight of her regal stature despite her bleary eyes.
Thunderball sighed and buried his face in his hooved. "With all due respect, Your Highness...get stuffed."
The entire table broke down into a fit of laughter at Thunderball’s act of lèse–majesté. Thunderball stared straight into the Apple family barn and drained another mug full of cider in horror over what he had just said.
Twilight wiped a stream of tears from her eyes. "See? That wasn't so bad, was it?"
Thunderball grumbled something unintelligible.
Twilight picked up another empty mug, and tried to drink from it, this time while it was upside down. "Really, I know — hic — that you've got to be a professional and everything, but you can speak freely around me. It's not like I'm going to — hic — banish you to the moon or anything. We’re all friends here."
Thunderball quietly set his mug down on the table and got up. "I'll try to remember that, Your Highness. May I be excused? I need to use the outhouse."
Twilight waved him on as she fumbled with her upside down mug. "Of course."
Ten minutes passed. Thunderball had not returned from the bathroom, and the cider was running low. Rainbow Dash decided that she would go search of a new barrel of cider. She walked down into the dimly lit Apple house's basement only to see that someone had beaten her to it. Rainbow stared at Thunderball, who had been sitting alone in the dark nursing a mug full of cider. He was sweating as if he had run for miles, and shivering despite the warmth of the cellar. "Thunderball? I thought you went to the outhouse."
"I did." Gone were the slurs that had marred his drunken speech; Thunderball spoke quietly, and with a steady voice. If Rainbow had not seen him drinking earlier, she would have sworn that he was stone–cold sober. "Then I came here. I wanted...a moment of silence. To honor the memories of those who could not be here."
Rainbow slowly backed up the stairs; this was a sensitive situation that she was not equipped to handle. "I'll come back later."
"You can stay." Thunderball cleared a basket off of a barrel next to him. "It's...good to have somepony else here."
The two sat in silence for a moment before Rainbow asked the inevitable question. "Who are you doing this for?"
"They were my SAS team. Equestria could not have asked for finer soldiers. Ran a dozen reconnaissance and sabotage operations against the changelings in the Badlands with them. Everything was going fine until we tried to infiltrate one of their primary hives..." Thunderball sighed and looked away. "Never mind. Forget about it. It's highly classified, and I doubt you'd be interested."
Rainbow gently placed a hoof on his shoulder. "Look, just because I'm a loud–mouthed idiot doesn't mean I'm an insensitive ass. If you want to talk about it..."
Thunderball stared straight ahead into a dark corner of the cellar.
"The bugs were waiting for us in the main chamber deep underground, like they knew we were coming. There must have been hundreds of them. Goldeneye ordered an immediate withdrawal, but there was nothing that could stop them from overrunning us like a swarm of cockroaches. Then Icebreaker dashed up towards the ceiling into a group of fliers, and before we could do anything that idiot detonated all of his explosives to collapse the chamber."
Thunderball was quaking in anger as he spoke, and his horseshoes ground into the barrel, digging lines in the aging wood.
"We ran as fast as we could as stalactites rained down around us and nearly got to the entrance before they caught up. Goldeneye went down in a flurry of magic bolts, and I would have too if Skyfall hadn't shoved me out of the way and taken them. He collapsed like a sack of bricks, and I had to drag him out. Moonraker was manning a cloud outside, and when he saw that we were being chased, he shot lightning bolts to give us some cover fire. The bugs focused fire on the cloud; I saw his body fall out as the cloud disintegrated from the sheer volume of magic they pumped into it. I had Skyfall over my back and flew as fast as I could; when I looked back I saw that the hive was far in the distance, but Skyfall, he...he was..."
He trailed off and buried his face in his hooves, breathing heavily in a desperate attempt to regain control of his emotions. Rainbow quickly shut the cellar doors and barred them from the inside to prevent anyone from walking in on them.
Thunderball’s next breath stuttered in a shaky rattle. "I...I know you have friends you need to be with...but can you stay? For a moment, at least."
Rainbow put her wing around Thunderball and let him rest his head on her shoulder. "I can't understand what you've gone through — not really — but I can imagine how awful it would be. I'll be here if you need somepony. I promise."
There was silence for several moments before tears rolled down her feathers like raindrops in a thunderstorm.
Thunderball hung his gas mask and combat suit in his locker after another long day of combat maneuvers. The locker room was empty save for himself, but the door soon opened, and the rest of his squad walked in with solemn expressions on their faces. Thunderball saluted Major Goldeneye as the squad took up positions around him.
The Major looked at him sadly. "Lieutenant, we need to talk. It's about your performance."
Thunderball was puzzled. His ranking was well above average for the regiment, and he had a clean discipline record, assuming that the army had never found out about that one incident with Cold Snap, Wind Shear, and the fruitcake shortly before deployment to Saddle Arabia. "Sir?"
"You've done well, Thunderball. Too well." His squad began to change; their coats turned black as they grew horns and shimmering wings. "You are a threat to everything we've worked for."
Thunderball's combat training kicked in, and he caught Goldeneye under the chin with a well–placed uppercut, which splattered the pony's jaw into a green pulp. He turned with the momentum and used his rear hooves to kick Skyfall in the chest, sending the fellow airborne infantrypony into a row of lockers, which cut his body so badly that it sprayed green ichor. Icebreaker lobbed a grenade at him, but Thunderball caught it in his hooves and sent it flying back towards the sapper. It hit Icebreaker in the side and exploded, liquefying him in a spray of green gore which clung to the floor and walls of the locker room.
"You've killed us again," Icebreaker's voice taunted him as the goo stirred and began to pull together before Thunderball's eyes. "All you do is bring death to ponies. How many more times will it happen? How many more times will you let your friends die? How many more ponies will you kill?"
He looked around to see the others recovering in a similar manner. Thunderball dashed past the regenerating Goldeneye and ran out the door to seek help. He turned right in the corridor and found himself in the Golden Oaks library, where Princess Twilight and the other Bearers of the Elements of Harmony had already assembled.
"Your Highness, the changelings are attacking!"
"Yes, Thunderball, I know," Twilight said serenely. "That is why I have called the others here."
Her five friends gathered around her and began to transform into changelings, while Twilight revealed herself to be the queen.
"Hold still," she hissed, "and it will be easier for you. Resistance is futile."
Thunderball flinched as a ray of bright green light shot out from her horn and engulfed his body. He felt his skin tingling and looked down at his hooves to see that they were slowly turning black...
–
Thunderball shot up out of bed and rolled out onto the floor in a defensive position as he looked around for changelings. The cavern walls around him seemed to devour all light, and he could hear the skitter of changeling drones massing in the darkness. His eyes darted back and forth and he saw a sliver of light high up in the cavern wall, his only hope at escape. Thunderball scrambled to his hooves and bolted up the stairs until he burst through a half–shut door into the well–lit library.
Panting heavily, he leaned against the window and bathed in Celestia's glorious sun as ephemeral images of his dream swam through his mind before fading into nothingness. He shook his head and tried to remember how he had gotten back to the princess's library. Everything from sitting down to dinner at Sweet Apple Acres onwards was a vague blur of colors and sounds. Thunderball wondered if he had managed to get another concussion. His head hurt, his vision was blurry, and his coordination was nonexistent. However, the smell of alcohol emanating from his body, the foul taste in his mouth, and the dryness in his throat indicated that he had simply had too much to drink. Again.
A short time later, the stallion walked into the kitchen in search of some water, only to find Twilight standing before him cooking breakfast. Thunderball slowly backed out of the kitchen hoping that she would not notice his presence, but she turned around before he could escape and smiled warmly.
"Glad to see you're awake!" Twilight grabbed Thunderball before he could excuse himself and dragged him over to the table. "Have a seat; lunch is almost ready."
Thunderball’s stomach rebelled at the thought of food, but he miraculously managed to keep it under control.. "...Lunch?"
Twilight smirked. "Yes, the second meal of the day, commonly eaten around noon."
Thunderball caught himself before he could roll his eyes and forced himself to stare at the table. "I know what lunch is, Your Highness. But you shouldn't be..."
Twilight looked around the kitchen. "Cooking? But how would we eat if I didn’t cook?"
"Well, not exactly..." Thunderball struggled to find the right words to tell Twilight that she should not be attending him like she was a common serving mare. "Oh, never mind. Why did you let me sleep in so late? I'm supposed to be helping you, Your Highness."
Twilight levitated a hearty vegetable stew onto the dining table. He thought it smelled surprisingly good despite his tender stomach. "Well, I figured you needed to sleep off all the cider you drank last night."
Thunderball wanted to slap himself in the face for making a spectacle out of himself in front of royalty. "I don't remember...How much did I have?"
"I can't say. Rainbow says she found you passed out on your way back from the outhouse." Twilight laid a large salad next to the stew and pulled out a chair. "Come on, eat."
Thunderball remained standing. "After you, Your Highness."
Twilight sat herself down and helped herself to a generous portion of the salad. "Now will you please sit down and eat something? You need to rehydrate yourself after drinking alcohol. Ethanol interferes with the body's production of vasopressin, which is a hormone that restricts blood vessels and retains water. (That is, incidentally, why the blood vessels dilate and bladder fills up while drinking.) The ensuing dehydration results in a headache and thirst."
"You don't say?" Thunderball was still trying to adjust to the fact that a princess was serving him lunch.
"Oh yes! And the metabolism of ethanol in the body produces acetaldehyde as a toxic byproduct. Fortunately, it's then quickly converted into acetic acid, but it's still pretty bad for you. And processing all that ethanol drains your body of vitamin B6, since it's a cofactor in the amino acid metabolism of ethanol."
Twilight stared him down with a look that would've made his mother proud. "So eat."
"Yes, Your Highness." Thunderball obediently helped himself to a bowl of stew. Maybe it would help him feel better.
Twilight massaged her temples. "I really wish you'd stop calling me that. Did you ever give Celestia this much trouble?"
Thunderball looked up from his stew with a slight grin on his face. "Actually, there was this one time…"
_
Thunderball cantered into the throne room as M, the black unicorn mare who directed the Secret Intelligence Service, called him in to deliver his report to Princess Celestia. He walked into the room and gave a respectful bow to the alicorn on the throne before him, followed by a salute to the intelligence officer.
Celestia regarded him from on high with interest. "So am I to understand that the changelings are planning something?"
Thunderball stood rigidly at attention as he answered his diarch. "Yes, Your Majesty. I was there when we took out a cell in the Foal Mountains. They had maps of Canterlot and a list of key ponies, including Captain Shining Armor and Princess Cadenza."
Celestia remained calm, though Thunderball could see concern in her eyes. "Then we must move to secure Canterlot — though it will be difficult with the upcoming wedding. It looks like we'll have to call in MID–05 to oversee security."
M nodded nonchalantly. "I have every confidence that the Internal Security Service is up to the task. Meanwhile MID–06 will move immediately to counter the threat abroad. I am sure the SAS would be willing to second us some troopers for this operation if we required more horsepower."
Thunderball saluted stiffly. "The regiment stands ready to serve, Your Majesty. MID–06 has been searching for changeling hives for years now, and we have a list of possible locations in hoof. My squad is ready to attempt an infiltration and uncover more information at the source."
Celestia smiled and filled the room with radiant warmth. "The Crown appreciates your devotion, but I assure you, you can stop addressing me as 'Your Majesty,' Lieutenant."
"Yes, Your Majesty."
"...Incidentally, my sister and I require a discreet stallion to service us this evening. Would you be willing to oblige us?"
"Of course, Your Maj—" He blinked. "What?"
Celestia's grin flashed as brightly as her solar namesake. "Got you!"
_
Twilight stared at Thunderball and looked utterly scandalized. "Celestia did not say that."
Thunderball shrugged and went back to his stew. "If you say so. Your Highness."
There was a tap on the window. Twilight and Thunderball looked over to see Rainbow Dash waving at them. "Morning, Twi! How's my favorite princess doing?"
Twilight telekinetically opened the window to let Rainbow in. "Slightly exasperated, but I’ll live. What brings you here today, Rainbow?"
Rainbow proudly puffed up her chest. "I'm here to help Thunderball find Bon Bon. Gotta help him apologize for ruining her night at the Gala, right?"
Thunderball frowned. "I might not remember much about the Gala, but I recall it being an utter disaster because of what some other ponies did. Ponies in Canterlot were still talking about it when you crashed the Garden Party. You should have heard what some of them were saying about you."
Rainbow Dash raised an eyebrow. "Say, what was an office jockey doing at both the Garden Party and the Gala, anyways?"
Thunderball downed a good mouthful of stew briefly before answering. "...Paperwork."
"Like I'm supposed to believe that," Rainbow said with an amused smirk. "I'm the Element of Loyalty, not Gullibility." She circled around him slowly. "Does the military spend all its time filing reports? That would explain why I haven't seen the army around much when we've had emergencies."
Twilight cleared her throat. "Actually, the Equestrian army is busy suppressing bandits, hunting down dangerous magics, watching the borders, securing important locations, guarding the royal family, fighting dragons, and repelling changelings and other threats."
Rainbow's eyes lit up. "You fight dragons? Like the one that smogged over Ponyville, or the big purple one that attacked the village a few months ago?"
Twilight's eyes narrowed dangerously. "That last one was Spike! And he was just going through a phase."
Thunderball quickly shifted the topic to a less unpleasant one. "Actually, fighting dragons is how I got my first bravery citation. I drop–kicked a dragon right between the eyes. Blinded him with a flash of lightning, too. I'm pretty sure the thunderclap deafened him as well."
Rainbow leaned in excitedly. "And did that take him down?"
Thunderball shook his head. "Oh no, it just made him angrier. He flung me into a barn and set it on fire. My hair didn't grow back for a month."
Rainbow slapped his back approvingly. "We're not so different, you and me."
Thunderball wanted very much to disagree with her, but decided that the conversation would be over faster if he remained silent and ate his stew.
Twilight took the opportunity to start a new line of conversation. "So RD, how well do you know Scootaloo?"
Rainbow leaned back in her chair. "Well enough. She hangs out with me all the time!"
"Good. Then can you tell me something about her parents?
Rainbow slowly drew herself up in the chair. "Come to think of it, no. I don’t think I’ve ever actually met them. Why do you ask?"
Twilight levitated a sheaf of papers over to the table from her study. "Well, I was going over Ponyville census records yesterday afternoon, and I noticed some anomalies. There was an unusual increase in population two years ago, around when Scootaloo arrived. Records show Scootaloo was enrolled in school shortly after, but I can't find any trace of her parents. At all. It's like they don't exist."
Rainbow raised her eyebrows. "Are you saying that Scoots is a changeling?"
"Either that or there is something terribly wrong with Ponyville's recordkeeping department."
Thunderball looked alarmed. "Your Highness, Scootaloo knows I'm an SIS agent. We should move immediately to take her into custody for questioning."
"Missing records aren't proof of wrongdoing, Thunderball," Twilight said sternly. "Let me handle this matter; you go about your business, and I'll let you know when I need help."
Thunderball looked at her skeptically. "If you say so, Your Highness. Come on, Rainbow, show me where Bon Bon lives."
The two pegasi left with Thunderball's apology gift in tow, while Twilight wrote a letter to Princess Celestia. Spike sent it off in a puff of green smoke while Twilight called for Owlowiscious. "I hope you're ready for a special assignment, Owlowiscious. How do you feel about shadowing Scootaloo?"
"Who?"
Meanwhile, in Ponyville...
"You really don't like changelings, do you?" Rainbow observed as the two pegasi walked towards Bon Bon's house.
Thunderball kicked a rock in the road hard enough that it flew into a grove of trees thirty feet away. "Who does? You were there when they invaded Canterlot."
Rainbow proudly drew herself up to full height. "I was in the thick of the fighting. Got captured and treated to a front row seat when Shining Armor kicked Queen Chrysalis and her minions out of Canterlot. What about you?"
Thunderball kicked another rock into the grove. "I woke up in a full body cast three days after; I don't remember anything, but they say a tower collapsed on me at some point during the fighting."
Rainbow winced sympathetically. "Ouch. Guess that explains why we never saw you kicking flank. Hey, were you around for Discord as well?"
Thunderball grimaced as he remembered the chaos Discord had unleashed. "Cactus. Don't ask."
"You know, you're not so bad once you start talking," Rainbow chuckled. "Now all we need to do is to get you to loosen up around Twilight."
The suggestion drew a sigh of exasperation from the stallion. "Look, Rainbow Dash. I know you mean well, but when one pony's obligated to take orders from another, friendship is out of the question."
"So? That's no reason for you to act like you're always on duty, especially around other ponies."
Thunderball looked away. "Sometimes it's easier to be your job than yourself."
Thunderball stopped talking after that, and Rainbow led him to Bon Bon's house in silence. She rang the doorbell and was greeted by Lyra.
"My friend wants to talk to Bon Bon." Rainbow gestured to Thunderball, who nodded in agreement.
"Alright, let me just call her over." Lyra went back in the house and came out with Bon Bon. Thunderball immediately recognized her as the same mare he had run into yesterday.
"Ooh, what's this about?" Bon Bon said as she caught sight of the box of cupcakes. "Did I get a package?"
"Sort of." Thunderball opened the box to reveal 13 chocolate cucpakes nestled neatly against one another. "I thought I'd buy you some cupcakes as an apology."
Bon Bon took the cupcakes, but looked confused. "For what?"
Thunderball blinked. "You...Didn't you run into me yesterday? We had a conversation about how we met in Canterlot last year at the Gala."
"Oh yeah! Sorry, I was a bit distracted." Bon Bon grinned as she put a foreleg around Lyra’s neck. "I was busy making plans with Lyra that night."
Lyra blushed and kicked Bon Bon in the leg. "You don't need to tell everypony about that, Sweetie."
"I...see." Thunderball's expression was blank as he backed off of their doorstep. "Well, enjoy the cupcakes anyways. Sorry to bother you."
He walked back towards the library at a brisk pace, leaving Rainbow Dash to explain things to the confused couple. When she had finished and caught up with him, she could see that he was sweating.
"Hey! What was that about?"
"Either Bon Bon is a changeling, or I ran into a changeling impersonating her yesterday," Thunderball whispered. "We need to report this to the Princess immediately."
The agent broke into a brisk trot and did not stop until he reached the library. Rainbow opened the door from the inside and beckoned him in. "Come on, Twilight's waiting for you."
Thunderball blinked. "How did you...?"
Rainbow flapped her wings.
"Right," he said. "Let's go."
Thunderball raced into the study and voiced his suspicions without any preamble. "Your Highness, Bon Bon has been acting suspiciously around me. Yesterday she recognized me and said we had met at the Gala, but today she did not recognize me at all. I recommend we detain her and her partner immediately until we can confirm that they are ponies. We should establish a quarantine of Ponyville and begin testing its inhabitants right away."
Twilight stared at him in surprise, her quill hanging out of her open mouth. "Thunderball, do you have any idea how many ponies we'd be rounding up? Not to mention the fact that it would be completely illegal and a violation of privacy?"
Thunderball’s nostrils flared. "This is an emergency. You can invoke changeling security protocol 23 and initiate—"
Twilight drew herself up to her full height and stared Thunderball straight in the eyes. "I will do no such thing. Yes, we have a changeling problem, but I will not start a witch hunt. Leave it to me to sort it out."
Thunderball gave her a long, hard look. "As you wish, Your Highness. What, then, is our plan of action?"
Twilight pulled out a chart stand from out of nowhere and set a large chart on it. "I'm glad you asked. Sit down and be ready to take notes; the presentation begins now."
Two hours later...
"...And that is how we can safely identify and capture the changelings," Twilight finished. She looked around the library to see that Rainbow Dash had fallen asleep in her chair, while Thunderball's eyes had glazed over as his mouth took notes on autopilot. "Err...Did you get all of that? May I should start over again."
"No!" Rainbow Dash shouted as she sprang awake. "I mean...I understood everything."
Twilight rolled her eyes. "Then maybe you can tell me what Owlowiscious is doing?"
Rainbow began to stammer. "Well, um, he's obviously out on a daring, super secret, and totally awesome mission to..."
Thunderball sighed and decided to toss her a bone. "Follow Scootaloo."
Rainbow nodded enthusiastically. "Yeah! So we can learn..."
"Who her parents are."
"And find out why they haven't been paying taxes!" Rainbow concluded dramatically.
Thunderball facehoofed. "If they are changelings or not."
Rainbow blushed. "Uh, yeah! That too!"
"Well, I'm glad somepony was paying attention," Twilight nodded with approval. "Any questions?"
Thunderball shook his head. "No, none at all, Your Highness. Although...Might I suggest we rest up in preparation for tonight's activities?" Thunderball slumped down in his chair, his jaw creaking as he tried (unsuccessfully) not to yawn. "We'll need to be...wide...awake..."
"Yeah." Rainbow did not even trying to hide her yawn. "Gotta...be alert...changelings."
Twilight levitated a couple of blankets and covered the two pegasi as they drifted off into a deep slumber.
"Well, at least I'll have plenty of time to practice my anti–changeling spells!" she said cheerfully as the room filled with the sound of ponies snoring.
Scootaloo stretched out along the floor of the clubhouse as she watched the sun set over Ponyville. It was a satisfying conclusion to yet another fun–filled day of crusading for her cutie mark. She looked at her blank flank wistfully, yearning for the day she would get her own — if that was even possible. To be honest, she was starting to have her doubts, but she still had hope that she would discover her special talent.
There was a gentle thud of a pony treading on the steps outside, and Scootaloo shot up in alarm. If anypony found her here, it would lead to uncomfortable questions. She grabbed her scooter and made for the window, only to find Rainbow Dash blocking it. "Hey Squirt! How's it going?"
"Oh, um...Hi Rainbow," Scootaloo said cautiously. "What brings you to the clubhouse? Are you here to help me find my cutie mark?"
Twilight stepped into the clubhouse, followed by a stiff–backed Thunderball. "No, we just want to ask you some questions."
Scootaloo's pupils shrank as she looked between Twilight and Thunderball. "Q–Questions?"
Twilight looked around the clubhouse. "Scootaloo, what are you doing by yourself here so late in the evening? Shouldn't you be at home?"
Scootaloo giggled neriously. "Oh! Ha ha, yeah, home. I was about to head back there. I just came by to pick up some things I left behind earlier. You know, while I was with Apple Bloom and Sweetie Belle. Forgot my scooter, can you believe it?"
Rainbow sighed and put her hoof on Scootaloo's shoulder. "Kid, you don't have to lie to us. Can't you tell us pony to pony why you're not at home?"
Scootaloo's eyes darted between the window and the door, as if calculating her chances at escaping.
"What's the matter, Scootaloo? Don't you trust me?" Rainbow asked quietly.
The pegasus filly gulped nervously. "No, it's not that. I just didn't want you to think I was uncool."
"Come on, Squirt. What could possibly be uncool about your parents?"
Scootaloo bit her lip. "I...I don't have any."
Twilight looked shocked. "Scootaloo, a filly like you just can't be living all by herself. It's too dangerous! Why didn't you tell anypony you were an orphan?"
"Maybe she isn't," Thunderball growled as he advanced on Scootaloo. His iron horseshoes clanked menacingly as he stalked towards the filly. "How does a filly enroll herself in school? You need an adult to handle the paperwork."
"I don't understand," Scootaloo whimpered, crouching down on the ground.
Twilight’s horn began to glow with magic. "It's alright, Scootaloo. One spell will sort this all out."
"Rainbow! Don't let her cast another spell on me!" Scootaloo shouted as she dived behind her idol. "I still have nightmares about the 'want it, need it' spell."
"Okay, fair point," Twilight conceded as her horn lost its magic.
"Excuse me," Thunderball growled, "but what happened to your parents?"
Scootaloo looked down at the floor. "I never knew my dad, and my mom was always yelling at me about how useless I was because I couldn't fly, so when I was old enough to ride my scooter I just...left."
Twilight looked puzzled. "Then how did you enroll in school?"
Scootaloo scuffed her hoof on the clubhouse floor, mumbling something about Miss Cheerilee helping her.
Twilight raised an eyebrow. "Cheerilee? Well...I suppose we should pay her a visit and clear this up."
The trip to Cheerilee's house was quiet except for the buzzing of Scootaloo's wings as she rode her scooter. Rainbow Dash in particular seemed deep in thought over the revelation that Scootaloo was a runaway. Ten minutes later, they were standing outside Cheerilee's house. The schoolteacher answered the door with an apron on her waist and a frown on her face. "Can I help you, Princess Twilight?"
"Sorry for coming so late," Twilight said. "But I was wondering, could you tell me how Scootaloo was enrolled in your school? We just found out that she doesn't have any parents."
Cheerilee looked around nervously. "Perhaps we should talk about this inside?"
Thunderball stepped forward and fixed his stare on her. "Just answer the question."
Scootaloo walked up and patted Cheerilee on the leg. "Miss Cheerilee, it's ok. They're not going to throw you in jail or anything."
Cheerilee took a deep breath before releasing it slowly. "Alright. When Scootaloo first showed up in town, I talked to her and asked her why she wasn't in school, and she told me about her home situation. I couldn't leave her alone, so I enrolled her in the school so at least she'd have an education and the chance to meet some friends."
Twilight was completely unsatisfied with the answer. "But you never called social services? Scootaloo needs to be in school, but she also needs a family. A filly can't just live on her own."
Cheerilee stamped the ground in agitation. "I tried, but each time they said they'd get back to me and never did."
"Let me get this straight," Rainbow Dash interrupted with her usual lack of sensitivity. "You decided to leave Scootaloo out to fend for herself just because Ponyville Social Services is a bureaucratic nightmare? Even if there was nothing stopping you from taking her into your home?"
Cheerilee held back a stream of tears at the accusation. "I do let her stay. But my house is so small. Scootaloo spends a lot of time sleeping over with her friends and sometimes in the clubhouse when it's warm and she needs some time to herself. I'm honestly doing everything I can."
Rainbow Dash dropped to her knees and hugged Scootaloo. "Alright, from this moment on, you're staying with me, Squirt."
Scootaloo looked at Rainbow Dash with adoration in her eyes. "R–Really? I get to live with you?"
"Yeah," Rainbow said as her wings wrapped tightly around the foal. "Can't have a filly as awesome as you living by herself. You're with me now."
Cheerilee and Twilight both smiled at the news, but Thunderball's frown deepened.
"We still don't know if Scootaloo's telling the truth," the agent pointed out.
"The truth?" Cheerilee looked outraged. "Why would a filly run away if she wasn't suffering?"
"Maybe she wasn't running away," Thunderball growled. "Maybe she was sent."
Twilight shot him a stern glance. "Thunderball, that's enough."
Scootaloo looked from Thunderball to Twilight in bewilderment. "Sent? By who?"
"‘Whom,’ dear," Cheerilee corrected reflexively, to Twilight’s approval and Rainbow Dash’s incredulity.
"Never mind." Thunderball walked away from the ponies rejoicing over the fact that Scootaloo had found a new home, too wrapped up in his own thoughts to be happy for the runaway. When he reached the street he noticed Bon Bon pulling a cart towards the town square.
"Hey." He waved casually. "How were the muffins?"
Bon Bon smiled nervously. "Muff...? Oh! They were really...good!"
There was a brief pause in the conversation as their eyes locked. Thunderball moved towards her without breaking eye contact. "You know, I could have sworn I gave you cupcakes."
Bon Bon panicked at the look of hatred in Thunderball's eyes and ditched the cart with a panicked whinny so she could run down the street at full speed. Thunderball flew into her and bowled her over so that she landed on her back.
"Your Highness!" he shouted as he seized her in a headlock. "I've got one!"
Bon Bon struggled against his iron grip. "Let me go! I'm not a changeling!"
"Then how did you know I was looking for changelings?" Thunderball snarled, tightening his hold.
Twilight rushed over to the two. "Hold her still! I've got the spell ready!"
A beam of purple light hit Bon Bon, and the pony glowed briefly before turning into the exact same pony she was before. Thunderball released her in shock.
"Ugh. I t–told you," she said dizzily.
"But if she's not a changeling, then that means...Oh no!" Before Twilight could stop him, Thunderball took off into the air.
It took him less than two minutes to reach Bon Bon's house. He kicked down the door and ploughed through the house until he reached the bedroom, where he saw Lyra tied up on the bed and Bon Bon's doppelganger standing over her with a whip. Thunderball reflexively charged "Bon Bon" hard enough that he knocked her through the bedroom wall.
Outside, the changeling Bon Bon kicked Thunderball in the head, which loosened his hold. Green energy flickered around her as her coat turned black. Holes grew in her legs, while a jagged horn and insect–like wings appeared on her body. She stretched her new wings and took off towards the sky to freedom. Thunderball shot above her like a lightening bolt and dived down on her like a hawk. A pair of iron horseshoes crushed her wings in a maneuver intended to shatter an opponent's shoulders and wing sockets.
The force of impact carried them down through the branches of a tree. Thunderball grabbed the changeling the moment they hit the ground and turned her up to face him.
"Start talking," he snarled. "How many more of you are there?"
The changeling whimpered in fright, and he raised his hoof to strike her. Something hard and metallic hit Thunderball on the back of the head just before he could land the blow. He rolled with the hit and turned around to grab his assailant, pinning her to the trunk of the tree as he brought his free hoof up.
He stopped when he saw that he had caught Scootaloo.
"Run child!" the changeling shouted in a rasping hiss as she struggled to get up. "Save yourself!"
Thunderball lashed out at the insect with his rear hoof and swept her legs out from under her as he dropped Scootaloo. The changeling flailed around in panic and scrambled away from him the best she could despite her injuries before collapsing on the ground.
"Wait! Don't hurt her!" Scootaloo pleaded. She tried to hold Thunderball back, but a rainbow–colored blur swept her up and carried her away before she could reach him.
"Everypony just calm down!" Twilight shouted as she encased the entire group in a force field. "Thunderball, you can let me handle this now."
Thunderball continued advancing on the changeling as if he had not even heard her, with murderous intent in his eyes.
"Thunderball!" Twilight's shout penetrated the adrenaline clouding Thunderball's mind, freezing him in mid–step as he looked back and forth between Twilight and the changeling, unsure of what he should do. "Stand down!"
The order tore through his hesitation like a sonic rainboom, and he reluctantly backed away from the changeling.
Twilight approached the changeling and lowered her head to speak with it. "Alright. First thing's first, how badly injured are you?"
"I am...intact," the changeling rasped as she rolled onto her stomach. Twilight could see her wings shifting about as the broken bones rearranged themselves. "I will be fine."
Twilight ignored Thunderball’s look of outrage and helped the changeling to its feet. "Now, why don't you tell me what you're doing here? Are you working for Queen Chrysalis?"
The changeling shook her head. "The queen does not rule us."
Thunderball could restrain himself no longer and snarled. "All changelings have to obey their hive queen."
Twilight scratched her chin. "Actually, I think they can become independent if they've been separated from the hivemind for a prolonged period of time. Once their empathic bond with the queen is severed, they no longer feel her desires as strongly and are free to develop their own personalities."
The suggestion was greeted with a great deal of hostility from Thunderball. "I think you're getting real life confused with Star Trot. We can't trust a word she says. She needs to be locked up along with her friends."
Rainbow Dash hugged Scootaloo possessively. "Yeah! Those things are dangerous! Scootaloo, why'd you even think about getting involved?"
Scootaloo looked nervously down at the ground. A green glow slowly enveloped her as she reverted back to her true form. "I'm sorry I didn't tell anypony I just...I just wanted to fit in."
Rainbow dropped Scootaloo scrambled away from the newly revealed changeling. "Who are you? What did you do with Scootaloo?"
Scootaloo started crying from Rainbow’s rejection. "Nothing! I just disguised myself as an ordinary filly so that I could live here!"
The confession earned hear an angry flare from Rainbow Dash. "So that you could feed here, you mean. Is that the reason you've been trying to get close to me? Just so you could have a free meal?"
"No, Rainbow Dash! I really think you're the coolest pony in Ponyville, I just didn't want you to hate me! Please don't hate me!"
Rainbow Dash looked at the foal–sized changeling sobbing on the ground. After several agonizing seconds, she put her hoof on Scootaloo's head. "No, I don't hate you, Squirt. I'm disappointed that you didn't tell me, but I don't hate you."
Scootaloo hugged Rainbow Dash with both hooves as she turned back into a pegasus. "Does this mean we can still live together?"
Rainbow embraced Scootaloo with hooves and wings. "Sure thing, Scootaling."
"Absolutely not," Thunderball interrupted in outrage. "Those things are a threat to Equestria."
"Thunderball," Twilight said, her voice sharp enough to cut through the stallion’s ire. "I've known Scootaloo for years. She's no threat to anypony."
He turned towards Twilight and growled like an animal, his wild eyes full of fury and of fear. For a moment, he resembled a timberwolf more than a pony. "You don't know what they're capable of!"
Twilight stood her ground and responded calmly. "Yes, Thunderball. Yes I do. Not only was I there during the invasion of Canterlot, but...Celestia sent me your file."
Thunderball’s voice rose almost hysterically as he stamped his hoof into the ground. "Then you know what they did! They've attacked our friends, subverted our government, kidnapped ponies, and worse! They can't be trusted!"
The older changeling on the ground looked like she might pass out from her injuries at any moment, but she managed to stay awake. She eyed Thunderball cautiously, took in a deep breath and called his name. "Thunderball..."
Thunderball turned on her, his eyes blazing with hatred. "WHAT?"
"I...My brother...He told me so many wonderful things about Equestria," she said in a softer voice. "About how all ponies loved each other and lived happily. And...he told me about you."
"Your brother was a spy and an assassin," Thunderball snarled. "He killed Skyfall!"
The changeling's voice trembled. "Yes, he was...and he did. When Chrysalis sent him out, he listened to her every word, but the friendship he saw changed him. If he wanted to kill you, would he have saved your life?"
Thunderball's hair slowly stood on end as he stalked towards the changeling with murder in his eyes.
"Thunderball, stop."
He looked over to see Twilight's hoof on his shoulder. Thunderball closed his eyes and forced himself to breathe as memories of Skyfall came flooding back into his mind. He saw them diving for explosive mines in full scuba gear. He saw them racing through cramped caverns with gas masks on as their instructors flooded the air with noxious gas. He saw the great hive disappear into the horizon as he escaped the changeling ambush, only to see his best friend’s dead body slowly turn into the black, chitinous form of the enemy.
"Your friends were an important part of your life. You should never forget them or their sacrifices for you, but that doesn't mean you have to live in the past. They would have wanted you to have a rich and fulfilling life. You need to rediscover that happy pony who joined the army so long ago."
Thunderball's voice choked up with anguish. "I...I think he died with his friends back in the Badlands."
"I know it is hard to lose friends, and healing can be painful, but you can't live life alone." She nudged him when he refused to meet her gaze. "Thunderball, look at me."
Thunderball opened his watery eyes to see Twilight looking at him kindly. Her soft violet eyes shone with more compassion than he could bear.
"I ask you this not as your princess, but as a fellow pony: will you let me be your friend?"
Thunderball turned towards Twilight and rested his head on her shoulder. Tears rolled out of his eyes and onto her wings as his breathing became ragged.
"You are not alone," Twilight whispered. "You will never be alone, as long as you have ponies..." She looked at the two changelings near them and quickly added, "...friends, who care for you and support you, no matter who they are."
"I'm sorry too," the adult changeling whispered. "Princess Twilight, we never meant to cause this much trouble. If you will allow it, we...we would be willing to leave Ponyville and go elsewhere." She held back tears as she made the offer. "It might be best for everypony involved."
"Let's not make any rash decisions here," Twilight said. "Can we all talk this over tomorrow, at the library? Bon Bon, er..."
"Lyra and Bon Bon call me Bonling," the changeling replied.
"Bonling, could you bring your changeling friends to meet me there? I would like to talk to you all and see if we can reach a compromise."
Bonling nodded. "I will convince as many to come as I can."
Twilight gently guided Thunderball back to the library basement with her wing around his shoulders. He had not said a word since they had parted with Bonling, Rainbow Dash, and Scootaloo. In fact, he had remained as quiet as a rock despite all her attempts to reach out to him, as if he had withdrawn into his own world.
She took her wing off of Thunderball when they had reached his cot and tried to talk to him one last time. "Look, Thunderball, I know this is hard for you to accept, but I think this is for the best; I really do. We have a chance to turn our ancient enemies into new friends."
Thunderball just stared blankly at his hooves. Twilight gave him a soft hug before walking up the stairs and turning off the lights. No sooner had she closed the door than she heard a loud thump. She wheeled back to the basement door and opened it in alarm to find Thunderball with his hoof on the light switch, sweating bullets, and panting as if he had just run a marathon.
"Don’t do that!" he snapped, before remembering who he was talking to. "Your...Highness..."
The sight of how frightened he looked made Twilight wince. Given what happened to him in the changeling caves, she should have known the veteran would be highly nyctophobic. "I’m sorry, I didn’t know. Do you...Do you want me to stay with you for the night?"
"Thank you, but no," Thunderball said numbly. "Good night."
He closed the door abruptly and flew down the stairs. Thunderball lost no time in unpacking his saddlebags, shedding equipment he would not need. The thought of "Bonling" walking around the streets of Ponyville was outrageous; the pest should have been locked up or exterminated on sight, as far as Thunderball was concerned. If Princess Twilight would not believe that the changelings were a threat, he would find proof of it and convince her. Or possibly take care of it himself, if the opportunity arose.
His old SAS gas mask lay on top of his bed; he grabbed it and pulled it over his face. His hoof flicked a switch on the side of the mask and he saw the world in a sickly green color as the integrated night vision device activated. It was a good thing he had brought a healthy supply of operational gear with him; he would have to do this entirely on his own. Thunderball tossed his saddlebags over his back and climbed smoothly back up the stairs.
He exited the library quietly to avoid disturbing either the princess or Spike and flew up high into the air. Clouds covered most of the night sky, but there was enough light for his night vision goggles to amplify, and he could see the occasional pony wandering the streets. Police officers, late night party–goes, and a fake beige earth pony with a pink streak in her cobalt blue mane.
Thunderball glided down to a rooftop above Bonling like a barn owl and tailed her as she went about contacting her conspirators. The first house she visited was on the outskirts of town, relatively near Fluttershy’s cottage, and its occupant turned out to be a sea green earth pony mare Thunderball was unfamiliar with. Thunderball hid in a tree several hundred yards away and pulled out a directional microphone. He slipped the earphones on, turned on the device and a hoofheld tape recorder, and tuned into their conversation.
"—and she invited us to talk to her tomorrow!" Bonling concluded cheerfully.
"R–Really?" her friend stammered. "You mean she won’t lock us up or anything?"
"Nope!" Bonling smiled so brightly that Thunderball could have seen it from his hiding spot without his goggles. "She’s really sincere about it; I could hear it in her voice!"
Thunderball tensed up, sure that they were rejoicing due to Princess Twilight’s gullibility. What happened next surprised him as much as it did Bonling. Her friend hugged Bonling tightly and pranced around in joy.
"You mean we might be able to live openly? Lead a normal life like everypony else?"
Bonling tried desperately to rein in the overenthusiastic bug. "Don’t start rejoicing yet; I don’t think we’ll be allowed to walk down Main Street as changelings anytime soon, but we won’t be in danger of being arrested or killed for now."
The two hugged and parted ways, while Thunderball angrily shoved the microphone back in his saddlebags. He continued to trail Bonling like a shadow, slipping from one pool of darkness to the next as she went about her route. However, each changeling she visited acted the same way, with happiness and giddy relief instead of sinister gloating.
At last, Bonling returned to her house, which still bore gaping holes in its walls. Thunderball set up his microphone again and pointed it at the house, hoping that Bonling would slip up once she was safely in her home. She wouldn’t have to hide her perverse nature any longer; after all, Thunderball was certain that she had bewitched the poor mares, keeping them within her thrall, ignorant as to her horrible nature and their ultimate fate as disposable food.
"Lyra! Bon Bon!" she squealed, followed by the sound of fur–on–fur as they hugged enthusiastically. "I’m so glad you two are alright."
Bon Bon nuzzled Bonling’s neck. "Me too. I thought that nutcase was going to kill me. Where does Twilight find these ponies?"
Lyra frowned. "Hey, don’t talk about Thunderball like that. I’m sure he was just doing his job."
"He nearly killed Bonling!" Thunderball grimaced at her defense of the changeling. Bon Bon obviously had no idea just what she was protecting. "Or did you not not notice him demolish our house!"
"Lyra’s right." Bonling’s soft voice stopped the argument dead in its tracks. "I...It’s not his fault. Chrysalis ordered my brother to kill and impersonate his best friend."
Bon Bon gasped in horror at the revelation. "How come you never told us?"
Bonling’s voice choked up with what sounded like real emotion. "I don’t like to talk about...about how things used to be, when we obeyed Chrysalis. I’ve been so happy since I came here, to the point where I sometimes forget all the worst parts of my life. I’m sorry I hid it from you." She took a deep breath and released it slowly. "But it’s time I told you everything."
"Shhh. It’s alright, dear," Lyra comforted gently. "We love you for who you are. Your past doesn’t matter."
Bonling sniffed and pulled Lyra in closer. "But I need to do this. For my own conscience if nothing else. I want an open and honest life with you, and that means no secrets."
Thunderball’s numb hooves automatically adjusted the recording device as Bonling told her story of growing up in Chrysalis’s hive as a warrior, of the daily struggle to find nourishment in the Badlands, and the strict hierarchy needed to maintain order in such harsh conditions. According to the story, she had grown up feeling that there was something more to life than obeying orders from her queen, and how she had pestered her brother with questions about how ponies lived. Slowly, her curiosity had fueled his, and together they had come to realize the power of love and friendship that ponies were blessed with was more than just a food–source.
Why was she telling her thralls these things? Wasn’t it bad enough that she kept them under her control without it? Thunderball ground his hoof into the tree angrily. He remembered stories from ponies in Canterlot after the invasion. Being enthralled meant it didn’t matter what she told them; they would be taken in by whatever she said. Acting like it was true just made his chest hurt, and he found himself doubting for a moment that she was anything but what she pretended to be. He stood up, sick of the farce and determined to head down there and throttle the changeling until she released the ponies from her hold. But then she mentioned his name, and he froze.
"My brother used to talk about Thunderball all the time, and I always wanted to meet him. I’d hoped that he could be able to find peace after seeing so many deaths, especially Skyfall’s, but I guess Chrysalis’s actions — our actions — have hurt him far too much. Bon Bon, if you want to blame anyone for Thunderball’s attitude, blame Chrysalis. He was never like this before; he was always brave and kind and loyal to a fault. My brother loved him more than anything; I could hear it in his voice. He ended up sacrificing himself to save Thunderball." Her voice carried so much pain that it felt like a knife in the pegasus stallion’s gut. "I know he wanted to make up for killing the pony he replaced and for lying to his friends. I guess he did, in the end."
Skyfall. Thunderball leaned his head against the tree and turned off the microphone. All he could do for several minutes was breathe, too overwhelmed from Bonling’s revelations and his own memories to do anything else. He gathered up the device and slowly made his way back to the library basement, where he curled up on the bed and cried.
Anger flooded through his mind at the thought of Skyfall. The changeling had deceived him.
He had betrayed Thunderball’s trust.
He had never said goodbye.
Skyfall’s death was so sudden — he had shoved Thunderball out of the way and taken a lethal blast before Thunderball could even register what had happened.
Laying there in the dim light of the basement and looking back on what he remembered, Thunderball now knew that what Bonling said had to be the truth, or at least a version of it. After all, the changeling had given his life to save him, without sparing so much as a thought to his original mission or allegiances. Thunderball's rage at the deception and the trauma of loss had blinded him to the idea entirely, and now it felt like a red–hot poker jamming itself repeatedly into his skull.
How could he be that stupid?
The ticking of the clock mocked his misery as he buried himself further in his blankets. Just how long had that pony been a changeling? He'd once thought the changeling had to have replaced Skyfall shortly before the end, but now, that didn't make any sense at all. Nopony sacrificed themselves for an enemy like that. Had Thunderball’s friend been a changeling all along? The pegasus had trouble believing that. He would have known, surely. How could somepony hide something like that from a friend as close as Thunderball had been?
He banged his head into his pillow, frustrated. Stupid, stupid, stupid.
Was their entire friendship based on one overarching lie? Was their friendship itself a lie? He'd thought so, and the idea had made him so very angry for so very long.
He tossed and turned, wishing desperately to fall unconscious so he could rest, but knowing sleep was a long way off.
Deceit. Betrayal. Treachery. Those words just didn't apply to the friend in his head, the one he remembered, from basic training to Saddle Arabia. Skyfall had always been the most dependable pony he'd ever known. Finding out he'd been a liar was bad enough, but that he had, in fact, been an enemy agent and a murderer? Thunderball felt like he'd been betrayed all over again.
–
General Cant stood in front of Thunderball’s company, his tail dragging against the ground and his mane limp from the exhaustion of the past month. At times, the old graying pegasus moved as if the only thing keeping his body alive was sheer willpower.
"Lads," he said with heavy breath, "the SAS has planted explosives around the capital’s walls. In two hours’ time, they will detonate, and we will have to storm the breach in order to seize a hoofhold. This is a high–risk operation, and we will only accept volunteers. All participants will be promoted one full rank. Let those who wish to contribute step forward, and those that wish to remain stay behind — but do not feel shame for choosing life over death."
The words had barely reached Cant’s ears before Skyfall stepped up alongside Thunderball, who turned his head and stared at Skyfall, his eyebrows raised in worry. "Skyfall? Are–Are you sure?"
The blond–haired, blue–eyed, white–furred pegasus laughed. "You think I’m going to let you hog all the glory? No, you’re not getting rid of me that easily. When we fight, we fight together, you and I. Back to back against the whole world if need be."
"That’s right!" Both ponies looked behind them to see Cold Snap advance out of the ranks and hold forth his hoof. "We stand together, we few, we happy few."
"We band of brothers," Skyfall continued, taking their unusual friend’s hoof in his own. "For he today who sheds his blood with me shall be my brother."
Thunderball added his own hoof to the pile. "Be he ne’er so vile, this day shall gentle his condition."
Cant wept at the display of camaraderie as more ponies stepped forward and he finished the quote. "And gentleponies in Equestria now–a–bed shall think themselves accurs’d they were not here, and hold their honor cheap whiles any speaks that fought with us on this battlefield today!"
–
Those times were over now, and Skyfall would never speak again, but Thunderball still had the memories of their time together, even if they hurt to think about. He lay on his cot remembering all the good times they had together and did not even notice the tears staining his pillow.
–
Thunderball was unusually quiet the next morning at breakfast. The deep rings under his eyes made it clear that he had not slept a wink since Twilight led him to his bed last night. He sat at the dining table in silence, barely touching the oatmeal Twilight had prepared for him or even attempting to protest the fact that she was serving him again.
The silence in the library was only broken by the sound of the main door opening. Twilight and Thunderball looked over to see Spike and Pinkie Pie leading a small crowd of perhaps a dozen ponies in.
Pinkie bounced around the crowd and herded them into the main room. "It's a coming out party!" The rest of the crowd stopped and stared. Pinkie's ears flicked, and she hopped to the side, giggling, into a corner. "I'll just stand over here, 'kay?"
"Sorry, library's closed," Thunderball said abruptly, his exhaustion coupled with his irritation at being the center of Ponyville's gay rumor mill (not to mention the anticipation of having to deal with changelings) making him especially grumpy. "Special business. Come back tomorrow."
"Uh, but we're here for the special business," One of the ponies pointed out meekly.
Twilight watched Thunderball cautiously as he processed the comment. His breathing grew shaky and his eyes watered until he suddenly shot to his hooves and flew out through the open kitchen window.
"Did Thunderball just bail on us?" Rainbow Dash asked as she walked in with Scootaloo, Bon Bon, Lyra, and Bonling.
Twilight sighed as she gazed out the window. "Please excuse him; he's going through a very difficult time."
Pinkie nodded sadly. "Probably for the best. Sometimes, a pony just needs time to himself, you know?"
Rainbow looked out the window, kicking her rear hoof on the floor in agitation. "He's missing out. This is going to be a historically awesome — no, awesomely historic! — moment."
Scootaloo nudged the polychromatic mare with her wing. "Maybe you should go find him, Rainbow," she suggested.
Rainbow hugged the filly, who nuzzled her back. "Nah, I have to be here for you, Squirt."
Bonling watched the two pegasi embrace each other, her mind turning to the pegasus who had just fled their presence in disgust. "I hope all ponies could be open–minded enough to accept us," she said sadly.
Twilight sighed. "I don't know if that will be the case, but I can promise that I'll do everything I can for you." She turned towards the changelings and gave them her best smile. "I'm honored that you all trusted me enough to come. I'd like to hear all about you and why you came to Ponyville, as well as why the ponies here decided to help you. I mean, not that I'm going to charge you for anything, but it's technically treason."
"Oh w–well..." Lyra stammered as she flushed a fiery shade of red. "We, um..."
Bon Bon quickly stepped in. "I found Bonling wandering around with a mild concussion during the invasion of Canterlot. I thought she was Lyra at the time, since that's who she looked like, just confused from being hit on the head. We tried to leave Canterlot, but there were too many changelings. She led me and several other ponies down to the caves to keep us safe, and risked herself several times to protect us. She said later that the concussion had dampened Chrysalis's control over her and allowed her to act on her own. She was sick of doing the queen's bidding and took the opportunity to escape. Anyway, we ran into the real Lyra along with Minuette and Twinkleshine in the caves and thought they were changelings, but they were under some sort of compulsion spell. Bonling managed to break it and free them, and we hid deeper into the caves. By the time we found out what all had happened, the invasion was over, and Chrysalis was too far away to control Bonling. She begged us not to turn her in, so we decided to take her with us, since it didn't cost us anything to let her feed off of our love."
Twilight nodded approvingly. "That's quite nice."
Bon Bon nodded, sending a lecherous grin toward the changeling in question. "Yeah, and then we found that it was really handy having another mare around," she continued, "or stallion, or mare with colt parts, or even Princess Celestia, or—"
Lyra quickly clamped her hooves over Bon Bon's mouth, while Twilight stuffed her hooves in her ears.
"Too much information, Bon Bon!" Twilight groaned.
Meanwhile, outside...
Thunderball soared around the town until he spotted The Prancing Pony, one of the larger bars in Ponyville. The colorful green structure stood proudly near the center of town and bright neon signs declared that happy hour was an all–day event, so Thunderball decided to try his luck and flew in for a much needed drink. He opened the door to see a relatively empty establishment, with a dimly lit oak bar and soothing classical music playing in the background. A few regulars were scattered about, passing the time with idle talk as Thunderball cut through their conversation on his way to the bar.
"Vodka maretini! Shaken, not stirred," Thunderball growled to the bartender as he slammed his bits onto the counter and demolished the atmosphere. "Use Grey Pony if you have it."
The bartender, a mahogany stallion with three cherries on his flank, looked big enough to bounce troublesome customers by himself, but he took the bits and hurried away to prepare his order, and returned in record time. Thunderball eyed the resulting maretini approvingly; it contained a healthy amount of alcohol and was garnished with two olives. He immediately slammed it back and signalled for another.
"Easy there!" a deep voice cautioned from behind him. "Did your date with Goldengrape not go well?"
Thunderball turned on the speaker, ready to hurl a barrage of colorful insults intended to cast doubts on the stallion's parentage, but stopped when he saw that it was Creme Brulee.
"Oh. Hi." Thunderball polished off another maretini and pushed the empty glass towards the bartender. "No, haven't seen him yet. I just...learned some things about an old friend I need to deal with first, and I’m not sure that I can."
Creme Brulee nodded sympathetically as he sat next to Thunderball. "Care to talk about it?"
Thunderball shook his head. "Not really, no." He glanced sideways at the massive draft horse. "You okay? You seem really...down."
Creme sighed. "Lately I've been feeling...really dishonest with everypony, especially Goldengrape. I've been given a chance to come clean, and my brother Caramel says I should take, it, but it scares me, so I came here."
Thunderball dumped a bag of bits onto the counter. "Bartender! Two vodka maretinis! And don't be stingy with the gin!"
"Thanks," Creme Brulee said sheepishly as he took a cautious sip. He immediately started coughing. "Wow, that's, um, some..."
Thunderball tossed his back like it was water. "Drink it quickly. The ice keeps the vapors condensed."
Creme Brulee gagged as he downed the entire glass in one swallow. "By Celestia's mane, who invented this?"
Thunderball crushed the olive between his teeth. "It's a Canterlot thing. You get used to it."
"Well, it certainly made me forget about the fact that I've been living a lie. For a moment, anyways." Creme Brulee sniffled. "I've deceived everypony, and it's been eating me up inside!"
Thunderball scrutinized the workhorse closely. "So why don't you stop?"
Creme Brulee looked down and twiddled his hooves. "But if I came out about it, everypony'd hate me!"
"Why?" Thunderball asked, though he already had a pretty good idea what it was about.
"Because, you know, of what I am," Creme Brulee whispered discretely. "Even Caramel was disgusted when he found out, and he's the nicest pony I know!"
While Thunderball initially thought Creme Brulee was talking about his homosexuality, he had also mentioned that he was deceiving Goldengrape as well, who would certainly know if his coltfriend was gay or not. Maybe the stallion swung both ways or something?
"Bartender? Give my friend a bottle of Wild Stallion bourbon." Thunderball pushed a generous heap of bits towards the bewildered bar stallion. "Look Creme, I can't say I've ever been in your position, but as a general rule things work out a lot better if you're just honest with everypony. Fewer lies to keep track of, and you can know who your real friends are."
Creme Brulee helped himself to a generous swig of bourbon. "Th–Thanks. I guess maybe I should come clean. After all, I might not get another chance. I'll see you later, and good luck with Goldengrape, okay? Treat him right."
"But—" Thunderball did not even get a chance to finish his sentence before Creme Brulee wrapped him in a hug tight enough to white out his vision and then ran out the door. He exhaled in frustration and downed his third maretini before leaving the bar. Once outside, he flew to the loneliest spot he could find — the clock tower — and climbed into the belfry. All he wanted right now was to be alone with his thoughts.
Thunderball felt sick. He leaned his head back against the bell, wishing he had some more alcohol in him. His head produced a dull ringing sound as it hit the warm metal. It was followed by the sounds of frantic struggling inside the bell. The stallion immediately poked his head under the edge to see Spike glued to the inside with green slime.
The agent lost no time in breaking Spike's bonds and pulling him out of the bell. He ripped the glob of slime off of the dragon's mouth and pinned him to the ground.
"Ow! Hey, I'm on your side, remember?" Spike yelled as Thunderball stared at him with furious eyes.
"What were you doing stuck to the bell with changeling slime?" Thunderball growled, his voice dangerously low.
Spike cringed under Thunderball’s withering gaze. "I don't know! I woke up like that!"
Thunderball looked to the library. "If you're the real Spike, that means the one I saw in the library today was a changeling. We have to contact Princess Celestia immediately. You go find a quill and write to her; I'm going to secure the princess."
"Will do!" Spike ran down the stairs to the belfry while Thunderball raced to the library, praying against all hope that he would arrive in time.
The meeting with the changelings had gone quite well in Twilight's opinion, even with Creme Brulee staggering in dead–drunk halfway through, leaning heavily on his "brother" Caramel. After hearing their stories, Twilight had decided to inform Princess Celestia and request that she grant an unofficial audience. Pinkie, Caramel, Lyra, and Bon Bon were doing their best to manage the changelings, while Scootaloo and Rainbow Dash stood next to Twilight. The crowd talked amongst themselves nervously at the news of Princess Celestia's impending arrival.
"Wow, we'll get to see the princess!"
"Does her mane really glow like the sunset?"
"Ugh. I'm never downing that much Wild Stallion again."
"There's a joke to be made in there somewhere, Creme."
"Shut up."
"I hope she doesn't banish us to the moon..."
"I wouldn't mind if she banished you. Remember that time you fed me pony laxative? They say love hurts. Turns out it burns."
Twilight looked over the chattering changelings; she had no idea there would be so many. "I can't believe this was going on under our noses."
Lyra approached Twilight cautiously. "If it makes you feel better, Twilight, we would have told you right away if they were up to something. The only reason nopony noticed was because we were covering for them."
Rainbow Dash looked over the crowd of changelings thoughtfully. "Makes you wonder what it would have been like if Chrysalis had decided to go all out, though."
Scootaloo looked at her, aghast. "Don't say that! Who knows how much trouble she'd cause?"
"Eh, we'd kick her flank in the end," Rainbow scoffed. "Just like we did last time."
Scootaloo gagged theatrically. "Last time you had the...ugh...the power of love."
Twilight and Rainbow Dash both stared at her in confusion. Twilight in particular looked flummoxed. "But...you’re a changeling. You eat love."
"Doesn’t mean I have to like it. I mean, it tastes like Pinkie’s baked bads. Yuck."
The Pink Peril popped up out of nowhere between the pegasus and the changeling, and everypony jumped, startled. "Hey! I've only maybe–almost–could've killed somepony with my muffins once or twice or three times, back when I was young and impressionable last year! Those were Applejack's baked bads! I have a reputation to maintain, you know!"
"Look!" Spike said excitedly, pointing through the window. "Princess Celestia's here!"
"What?" Twilight looked up, surprised. "I was sure she'd be teleporting into the basement to avoid drawing attention to herself, not flying in with twenty guards!"
The small dragon scratched his neck uneasily. "I don't know, maybe she wanted some security. I mean, you're asking her to meet with changelings, Twilight."
Twilight shook her head. "Well, whatever the case, I hope she has a good cover story. I don't want anypony in town to panic over this."
Spike put a comforting claw on her shoulder. "Relax, Twilight, what could possibly go wrong?"
Pinkie blinked a couple of times as she stared at Spike before sliding over to the side, well away from him. "I think I’ll just stand over here for a bit..."
Twilight sighed. "I don't know, but she's landing now. It's time to get this started."
Spike held the door open for Princess Celestia, who entered regally along with her guards. They circled the walls of the library as Celestia stepped into the middle of the main room. The changelings present all bowed in respect, while Twilight and Rainbow Dash walked up to their diarch.
"Princess Celestia, it's so good of you to come on such short notice," Twilight said. "As you can see, I've assembled several changelings who want to talk to you."
Celestia smiled. "Thank you, dear Twilight. You've saved me all the trouble of finding them myself."
"Pardon?" Twilight looked puzzled. "I don't understand."
Celestia chuckled. She lowered her head and shot a blast of green magic out of her horn, which caught Twilight in the chest and pinned her to the wall, where it solidified into a mass of green goo. "Gotcha."
Several guards seized Rainbow Dash and forced her to the ground as Celestia wreathed herself in an emerald fire, which burned away her appearance to reveal the changeling queen.
"Chrysalis!" Rainbow Dash yelled as she struggled and kicked, trying unsuccessfully to buck off her captors. "You lousy, no good, stinking—"
"No, Rainbow Dash!" Scootaloo ran towards her idol, but the guards caught and restrained her. "Don't make her angry! You won't like her when she's angry!"
"I don't like her now!"
Twilight tried zapping the adhesive mucus with the spell she used during the wedding. Unfortunately, not only was the goo tough, it also absorbed any spell she used and expanded as a result. It was feeding off of her magic. ‘Buck it all,’ she thought as she changed the modulation of her magic and tried again. It did the exact same as before. ‘Nothing’s ever easy.’
Without seeming to cross the intervening space, Pinkie suddenly stood between Chrysalis and her prey with a party cannon she had pulled out of nowhere. "Hold it right there, Chrysalis! Now, I know what you're thinking: 'Did she fill her party cannon this morning, or not?' Well, to tell you the truth, in all this excitement I kind of lost track myself. But being as this is a Party Explosion Mk VII, the most powerful party cannon in the world, and it would blow all of you right out the window, you've got to ask yourself one question: 'Do I feel lucky?' Well, do ya, punk?"
Chrysalis sighed and mentally commanded the changeling impersonating Spike to grab Pinkie Pie from behind. He was obviously much stronger than he looked to hold down the hyperactive party pony so easily. "Don't monologue, dear," she taunted as she delivered a condescending pat to Pinkie's fluffy mane. "You don't have the style to pull it off."
Twilight continued her struggles to free herself. "How did you know Celestia was supposed to be here?" she demanded.
Chrysalis sneered. "You really shouldn't dictate all your letters, dear. Someone might overhear you." She looked away from the princess and focused on the changelings cowering in front of her. "But if you'll excuse me, I have some words for my subjects. I fear it has been far too long since we last talked."
Bonling growled. "Not long enough, 'Your Majesty.'"
Chrysalis fixed the impudent changeling with a wicked glare as she forcefully re–established the empathic link between herself and her subject. Bonling screeched and collapsed to the ground under her psychic onslaught, writhing in pain as her mind was laid bare before the queen.
"Kneel! Kneel before your queen, you fools!" Chrysalis gloated. "Did you honestly think you lowly drones and workers could stand up to me, who defeated both Celestia and your precious Twilight Sparkle?"
Twilight tried prying at the goo with her horn, but it remained unscathed, and she growled in frustration. "Yeah, well, you didn't suck off a load of my brother's love this time!" she shouted. Everyone present stopped what they were doing to stare slack–jawed at the princess, who slowly turned a deep shade of red. "Wait. Let me rephrase that."
The Ponyville changelings looked at one another in fear, but most remained upright, despite the queen's obvious attempts at psychically crushing them.
"What is the meaning of this insolence?" Queen Chrysalis roared as she redoubled her efforts. "Bow to me now, or do I have to feed you to the recycling pools when I take over Equestria?"
Her wrath flowed through the link into the minds of every changeling present; some collapsed from the assault and clung to their friends, but none gave in to her demands.
Chrysalis signaled her guards and smiled viciously at Bonling. "I have had enough of this. I think it is time for you to learn the price of defiance. I'd hate to put you to waste, so I'll let my new elite warriors recycle your biomass into something more...productive."
The warriors dropped their pony forms as they advanced on their fellow changelings with razor–sharp fangs bared. Queen Chrysalis's psychic powers had crippled their prey, so all they needed to do was feast on their siblings and grow stronger.
There was a bright flash of light from outside, and the window exploded. Glass shards filled the air as Thunderball crashed into Chrysalis and slammed her through the library wall in an explosion of splinters. The empathic link vanished in an instant as Chrysalis became much more focused on the pony assaulting her. Her elite guard rushed out to protect her, which left Rainbow Dash free to rescue Twilight.
She quickly shattered the bonds with a series of well–placed kicks and pulled Twilight off of the wall. "What's the plan, Twilight?"
Twilight glanced around at the non–hostile changelings left in the library, many of whom were still shaken from Chrysalis's psychic domination. "First, we get the changelings and ponies safely into the basement. Then we start kicking flank."
"You heard the princess," Rainbow shouted. "Move!"
Pinkie ran to the basement door and flung it wide open. "Get in, everypony! Auntie Pinkie will keep you safe!"
Lyra put her hoof around Bonling's shoulder to pull her along. "Come on, let's go.
Bonling stood her ground, shaky but recovering. "No. No more running. I will stay and fight."
Bon Bon gasped in shock. "But there's so many of them!"
"All the more reason I should be out there fighting. I want you to survive. I want this town to survive." Bonling hugged Lyra and Bon Bon. "Stay safe. We'll be drinking at the Prancing Pony at the end of the day laughing about this, I promise."
"Yeah!" Creme Brulee slurred enthusiastically. "Me too! I’m going to kick some flank with you!"
Caramel sighed and dragged Creme to the basement by his tail. His speech was muffled by the mouthful of hair. "Not while dead drunk, you’re not."
Twilight ushered the obviously terrified changelings through until only she, Rainbow Dash, and Bonling remained.
Rainbow Dash took a deep breath. "Fine. Let's do this!"
Meanwhile, outside...
The ponies milling around outside the library gasped in shock as Thunderball and Queen Chrysalis landed in a tangled heap on the ground outside. They soon ran away in panic as the stallion straddled the changeling queen and clapped his hooves together on each side of her head. The iron horseshoes he wore made a satisfying crack as they impacted against her skull with a discharge of electrical energy. One of the warrior changelings immediately tackled Thunderball from behind and carried him off of Chrysalis, while the others landed on him in a diamond dog pile.
There was a mighty flash of lightning, and the changelings were thrown off of Thunderball as he shot up into the sky, his body surging with building electricity. He dove towards Chrysalis, who shot a blast of green energy at him; the bolt of magic hit the electric field surrounding Thunderball's body and exploded, knocking him out of the air and into the branches of a nearby tree. Thunderball looked up in a daze through the smoke to see a changeling warrior pounce at him with its razor–sharp teeth bared before a multi–colored blur whisked him away.
"Scootaloo's off to sound the alarm," Rainbow Dash shouted as they rocketed up into the sky. "We just need to hold out until reinforcements arrive!"
Thunderball looked down to see Bonling and Twilight emerge from the library to confront Chrysalis and her warriors as at least a dozen ponies around town turned into changelings and converged on their position. "While outnumbered and outmaneuvered? Sounds fun!" He grinned in the first genuine smile Rainbow had seen and unleashed a whooping battle cry. "DEATH FROM ABOVE!"
The two pegasi dove into the thick of their enemies. Chrysalis saw them coming and quickly fired off several shots. Thunderball rolled to the side to avoid them and delivered a swift uppercut to the royal changeling's chin, which sent her flying up into Rainbow's waiting embrace. Before she could reorient herself, Rainbow latched her hooves around the queen's midsection and pile–drove her into the village green headfirst.
A rainbow–colored mushroom cloud rose over the area as a shockwave leveled the grassy field. Twilight raced through the fallout towards the crater Rainbow Dash had made and peered over the rim to see her friend out cold at the bottom, with Queen Chrysalis nowhere to be found. Did the queen teleport out at the last second, leaving the rainbow–colored mare to slam into the ground headfirst? Twilight heard the sound of movement behind her and spun around, pointing her charged–up horn at the source of the noise.
"It's me!" Thunderball said, throwing his hooves up in the air.
Twilight kept her horn trained on the pegasus. "Prove it."
Before he could respond, a wave of green energy swept them both into the crater. A green force field sprang into existence over the crater, trapping the three ponies inside. Twilight quickly dispelled the barrier only to see Chrysalis's guards leaping in with their teeth bared.
A red blur jumped in front of Twilight and lashed out with its rear hooves, sending the changelings flying out of the crater. Twilight opened her eyes to see Big Macintosh standing over them protectively, while Applejack, Rarity, Pinkie, and Bonling, (in Bon Bon form), took up positions around her. In the background, the Ponyville alarm siren wailed in the distance, calling for aid from Cloudsdale.
Pinkie bounced around the crater excitedly. "Wow, is it disaster time again? That makes it the second time this month!"
Twilight quickly shook Rainbow awake as the changelings regrouped in the sky. The changeling queen snarled and rose above the battlefield, her tattered wings ablur. She and her warriors fired a barrage of magic blasts down at Twilight, who was forced to cast a protective shield over her friends. The alicorn grunted and collapsed onto her knees from the effort of deflecting the attacks.
"Can't...do this...forever," she panted. "Anypony...have a plan?"
Thunderball raised a hoof. "Rainbow and I should disrupt their fire so Your Highness can move to a better position."
"I can fly as well," Bonling volunteered as she shifted back into her native form, much to the shock of the other ponies. Applejack reflexively turned and bucked at Bonling, but Big Mac blocked her before she could land a blow.
"Remember what Scootaloo told us?" the draft horse reminded Applejack. "She's on our side."
Applejack's expression turned sheepish. "Err...sorry. I ain't used to thinkin' of changelings as bein' anything but enemies."
Rarity idly examined Bonling's gossamer wings with her hooves, much to the changeling's discomfort. "You have to admit, they'd make wonderful models. Not to mention there'd be a lot of ponies quite willing to pay money to spend time with a facsimile of their choice."
"...Thank you so much for that, Rarity." Thunderball tried his best to glare daggers at Bonling, but his eyes were hollow and tired. His head knew that she was innocent, but his heart just did not want to accept it, wanting to live on in a world where the lines between friend and foe were more clear–cut.
Bonling needed to help her friends, and working together was their best chance. She flicked her tail, her tone pleading. "Can’t you trust me? Just this once?"
Thunderball turned away. Bonling couldn’t see the look on his face, and she couldn’t tell if it was full of rage or...something else.
Her low voice managed to catch his attention, his ear flicking back for a moment. "I know you don’t like me, but this is about more than just me. Please, Thunderball. For everypony here. For my brother. And for yourself." Bonling shifted around to face Thunderball, carefully extended her hoof. "He today who sheds his blood with me–"
Thunderball flinched, as though she had slugged him. He closed his eyes and remembered how he and Skyfall had sworn to fight and die by each other’s side so many years ago. He raised a shaking hoof and, for a moment, Bonling thought that he was going to strike her, but he simply held hers loosely in his own. "–shall be my brother," Thunderball whispered.
Bonling smiled at the moment of understanding before Twilight spoke again. "Guys? I can’t keep this shield up forever."
Thunderball let go of Bonling’s hoof and turned towards Twilight with renewed vigor in his eyes. "Your Highness, please provide an opening on my mark. Three. Two. One. MARK!"
A circular opening large enough for one pony opened at the base of Twilight's shield. Rainbow Dash bolted through it, followed closely by Thunderball and Bonling. They flew out of the field of fire before Rainbow pulled up sharply and accelerated as fast as she could, triggering a sonic rainboom in the heart of the swarm. The shockwave broke up the changelings, knocking several of them out of the sky, and allowed the three fliers to pick off the remainder.
Rainbow Dash and Bonling teamed up against the bulk of the warrior changelings, using Rainbow's skills in karate and Bonling's knowledge of changeling insults. Bonling would zip around in front of a group of three or four, hiss out insults, and take off, dodging the sickly green blasts the angry changelings shot at her. Meanwhile, Rainbow would perch on a cloud out of sight until the bulk of the enemy was distracted, then hurtle like a rocket and drop–kick the unfortunate changeling warriors to the waiting hooves of Applejack and Big Mac before swooping up to repeat the performance.
The earth ponies, for their part, held their ground, bucking fallen changelings into a magically constructed iron cage Twilight had conjured for that very purpose. "Jus' like buckin' apples," Big Mac drawled, and Applejack couldn't help but grin at her reserved brother's comment.
Rarity sniffed delicately as she telekinetically lifted an unconscious changeling into the cage to the music of Pinkie Pie's party cannon and screaming townsponies. "Oh how I do hate all this uncouth roughness. It will take me hours to get my mane back in shape! Hours!"
Pinkie bounced around her friends, toting her cannon behind her. "Ooh! Ooh! You could style your mane like mine! I never need to brush it! It just kind of...poofs!" She giggled as she unloaded another round into the face of an incoming shapechanger, knocking it out from the concussive blast of confetti.
Rarity's sudden grimace of horror morphed into a fake smile faster than a changeling into a pony. "I...think I'll make do, thank you."
Thunderball worked by himself, moving from one changeling to the next like a well–oiled machine, applying every dirty trick he had ever learned to the battle. He showed no hesitation in dislocating joints, crushing throats, or ripping off wings as he tore through his enemies. Dead and crippled changelings dropped out of the sky in his wake until a whip of emerald fire suddenly wrapped around his body.
The stallion screamed as it seared his flesh, and he saw that the other end was connected to Queen Chrysalis's horn. The changeling monarch snapped her head and the whip tossed him towards the library. Twilight's magic caught him just before he hit the tree. Twilight, Rainbow Dash, and Bonling gathered around Thunderball as Chrysalis loomed in the sky with a dozen changelings around her. The changelings evaded suppressive fire from Twilight and Pinkie's party cannon (which Rarity had stuffed full of needles) as they advanced on the library.
Six streaks of lightning clouds broke through the changelings' formation as the Wonderbolts joined the battle. The aerial acrobatics team quickly took position alongside Rainbow Dash.
"Soarin, did you bring the ammunition?" Spitfire asked as she watched the changelings rally around Chrysalis, who was preoccupied shielding them from Twilight's spells.
Soarin reached into his saddlebags, but came up empty hoofed. "Sorry, I, uh, ate them. Those pies tasted so good!"
Spitfire glared at him, while Rainbow laughed. "Then I guess we do this the old fashioned way," Rainbow said as she cracked her hooves.
"Thirteen to nine," Thunderball observed wryly. "They almost have a chance."
Bonling readied her wings. "Let's go!"
Rainbow Dash took off towards the enemy, followed by the Thunderbolts. They flew in a tight formation and harried the changelings with hit–and–run attacks intended to split them up, while Bonling and Thunderball opted for a direct frontal assault. Bonling's horn glowed as she focused on the emotion of fear that Chrysalis had forced upon her earlier. She reached out to the nearest changeling and activated their empathic link so that he could feel it. The changeling stopped dead in his tracks, dazed, as the sensation overwhelmed him.
Thunderball's mane stood on end as he sped towards the changeling Bonling had stunned. His front hooves connected with the changeling's face, and a deafening static discharge exploded in the space between the two. Lightning rippled through the air and sent the changeling flying off into the distance. Thunderball immediately set his sights on a cluster of changelings and powered through them with another electric burst.
A pair of changelings charged him from below. The lead flier impaled Thunderball upon his horn, goring the pegasus in the ribs before firing a blast of energy while still inside him. A ray of green magic exited through Thunderball's body, spraying the air with blood. Thunderball cried in pain as he grabbed the changeling by the base of its horn and gouged its right eye with his hoof. He pulled himself off of the horn and kicked the changeling in the face hard enough to knock it out.
As his attacker fell, Thunderball felt himself growing weak from the blood loss. He tried to evade the second changeling, but several of his muscles had been damaged and he could not fly properly. The changeling's horn charged up with magic, and Thunderball stopped trying to fly and pulled into a steep dive. To his dismay, he noticed the changeling's beam firing directly into his fight path, and try as he might, he could not pull out. His eyes seemed like the only functioning part of his body, and they tracked the incoming shot dispassionately, as if it was some other pony who was about to die.
A dark mass slammed into him just before the ray could strike him, taking the full force of the blast. A shower of green ichor clouded Thunderball's vision, but he recognized the solid smoothness of a changeling's chitinous skin as Bonling carried him down to the ground. Above him, he could see a bright flash of light that heralded the arrival of Princess Celestia herself. Queen Chrysalis gave a impotent cry of frustration as the tide of battle turned firmly against her and disappeared in a puff of purple smoke, while her warriors dissolved into puddles of black tar, ending the battle.
Thunderball was dimly aware that they had won as Bonling laid him to rest on the ground. He felt strangely cold despite the bright sun and warm air outside. He struggled to breathe but choked on something that tasted like a mouthful of copper bits. A wet, sticky sensation crept along his body, and it took him a moment to realize it was his own blood.
Twilight rushed to the side of the fallen pegasus. "He's losing too much blood!"
Thunderball twisted his head around to examine his wounds. On an intellectual level, he realized that the proper response to seeing so much blood would have been shock, but he felt more amused than anything else. "You know, I never thought this would happen, but it's rather appropriate that my last decoration be the same as my first."
"Decoration?" Twilight asked as she conjured bandages out of thin air.
Thunderball felt a wave of giddiness wash over him and laughed. "My red badge of courage, of course."
Celestia descended from above and placed a hoof on Twilight's shoulder. "Twilight, he has suffered massive internal damage and has likely severed major blood vessels. We have to operate on him if we want him to survive long enough to reach a hospital."
Thunderball gazed up at the sky as Celestia lowered her horn to his wound. A soft beam of light covered the wound in an attempt stem the internal bleeding. "I always found it interesting how earth ponies and unicorns buried their dead. I get that they'd want to be connected with the earth, but pegasi want our spirits to be free after death and fly forever." Thunderball's voice grew shaky as the blood pooling beneath him grew larger. "I'll have none of that burial nonsense. When I die, I want my body cremated and my ashes scattered in the faces of my enemies."
"Stop talking like that," Twilight growled as she joined Celestia in mending Thunderball's wounds. "You aren't going to die!"
Thunderball smiled as his eyes glazed over. "Of course not. I would never do such a thing...without your permission...Your Highness."
"Buck it all! Don't you quit on me!"
"Oh come now, Your Highness," Thunderball chided gently. "It's not so bad. I'll get to see my friends again."
Thunderball reached his hoof up towards Twilight, but it faltered halfway up and fell limp to the ground. His vision swam as his neck muscles gave out. He found himself staring at the badly damaged Golden Oaks library as the world faded into darkness.
The soft chirping of birds brought Thunderball back to consciousness. The soft, warm cloud that his body rested on invited him back to slumber, but his mind was too curious to rest. 'Is this place the Elysian Fields?' he wondered. 'Funny. I never thought I'd end up here after everything that I've done.'
"Ooh! He's coming to!" a familiar voice cheered. Thunderball's eyes instantly shot open in terror. There was no way Rarity would be in Heaven with him. Had he woken up in Tartarus instead?
He was, in fact, in a brightly lit two–person hospital room, surrounded by medical equipment whose wires and tubes criss–crossed his body. Several, including a heartbeat monitor and an EKG machine, began to beep loudly as he regained consciousness. He looked around the sterile white room and saw Rarity sitting by the other bed, which had its curtains drawn. A warm breeze wafted in through the open window; judging from the position of the moon, it was very late at night. The door opened, and Princess Twilight came in, followed closely by her friends.
"Your Highness!" Thunderball immediately struggled to get up, only to be restrained by Twilight's telekinetic field.
"No!" Nurse Redheart burst into the room a second later and firmly, but gently, pushed him back into bed. "We did not just spend 14 hours dragging a legally dead pony back to life only for him to kill himself in the ICU! Do you have any idea how much paperwork I'd have to fill out?"
Thunderball reluctantly allowed himself to be bundled into his sheets. "You know, I could have sworn I bled out in front of the library. How'd I survive?"
The ponies looked at each other. Twilight was the first to speak. "Emergency blood transfusion. Princess Celestia clamped your severed blood vessels while I hooked you up to a transfusion kit."
Rainbow Dash shook her head. "I still can't believe Twilight had one of those on hand. "Talk about paranoid."
Twilight bristled at the accusation. "I'm not paranoid, I'm properly prepared!"
Rainbow laughed and nudged Twilight in the ribs. "Well, at least it wasn’t because Pinkie had them stashed all over Equestria. Right, Pinkie?"
Pinkie Pie looked up at the ceiling and whistled nonchalantly.
Rainbow cleared her throat. "I said, right, Pinkie?"
Pinkie Pie gave a nervous laugh. "Well, um..."
Rainbow could not believe what she was hearing. "You’re kidding."
"Hey!" Pinkie squawked. "I’ll have you know I keep those stashed around Ponyville in case of vampony emergencies! Better to have vampony food than be vampony food!"
Twilight visibly struggled to understand Pinkie’s logic. "But where would you get...? Oh, never mind."
"Now that’s just creepy," Applejack added with a shudder. "Raises more questions than answers if ya’ ask me."
Thunderball chuckled at the surreal conversation playing out in front of him. "Well, I'm glad you read my file, Your Highness. I doubt anypony’d have been able to find my bloodtype otherwise. I guess I should start wearing my dog–tags at all times."
Twilight cleared her throat uncomfortably. "I couldn't actually remember it in the commotion."
Thunderball looked around the room in puzzlement. "Then how'd you know to find a O– donor?"
An uncomfortable silence fell over the room as every other pony glanced uneasily at the other bed. Thunderball felt his hair stand on end as Applejack opened the curtain to reveal a heavily bandaged Bonling. The changeling timidly glanced into Thunderball's eyes before looking away again.
"What–?"
Twilight placed a hoof on his shoulder. "Thunderball, just give us a chance to explain." She gave him a moment to recover from the shock before continuing. "Bonling was just trying to help."
Bonling staring straight at the wall in front of her. "A skilled changeling can mimic a pony down to the genetic level if we have a blood or tissue sample to work off of. I just changed my blood to match yours and supplied you until the ambulance arrived."
Thunderball's expression was inscrutable as he stared down at his hooves in stony silence.
"I think you need some time to yourself," Twilight said as she blocked his view of Bonling with his curtain. The princess patted his shoulder gently and motioned her friends to leave. "The doctor tells me it'll be around two weeks before you can leave – perhaps less if Zecora has any remedies. We'll try to keep you company while you're here."
"Thank you, Your Highness," Thunderball mumbled.
Twilight shook her head as she walked up to the door. "We're friends now. Are you ever going to stop addressing me as 'Your Highness'?"
"Maybe when I'm off duty." Twilight perked up at the statement, and Thunderball smirked. "I said 'maybe,' Your Highness."
"I swear by Celestia's mane, I am going to make sure you live long enough to regret that," Twilight threatened before leaving, convincingly enough that Thunderball wondered if she really meant it.
There was a gentle clopping sound that echoed from beyond the door, and he looked up to see Rarity trotting into the room levitating a small wooden box, followed by Celestia in all her royal glory.
"Hello, Thunderball. I’m so glad to see you alive. I’ve talked with your superior officers, and we’ve decided to put you on medical leave. Now, I want you to take good care of yourself while you’re hospitalized, is that clear?"
Thunderball nodded, too stunned by the sudden presence of the princess to speak. Rarity placed the box on his lap and opened it for him. The light caught on a four pointed star’s silver surface and refracted in a scintillating pattern that left Rarity bedazzled and Thunderball in awe. It was the Star of Equestria, a medal awarded for uncommon valor above and beyond the call of duty. The medal itself might not have been worth much – many who deserved recognition for their deeds never received one – but the fact that Celestia had personally given this one to him left him shocked.
Celestia winked covertly at Rarity as she conjured a blank–covered book. "By the way, I brought you some required reading material while you're recuperating, Thunderball. I want you to read it and promise to do your best when the time comes to use it."
Thunderball caught the book in his lap. "O–Of course, Your Majesty."
"I'm dreadfully sorry," Rarity began after a moment, "but I simply lost my head in all the excitement and forgot to tell you that Goldengrape said he'd be willing to postpone your date for a while. He's in no hurry – in fact, I think it might be better for him to have more time to get over his breakup. You don't have to worry about a thing."
Thunderball glanced from unicorn to alicorn in dawning horror, rendered speechless before his diarch, who had just heard Rarity label him as gay. He looked at her, expecting to see a trace of anger or disappointment in her face, but only saw an expression of serenity. To distract himself from the awkward situation, he opened the book to read the first chapter's title, since its cover itself was bound in silk and devoid of text: How to make the best of your first date with another colt.
"Oh buck no," he groaned.
Celestia cocked her head. "What was that?"
"N–Nothing, Your Majesty," Thunderball stuttered in embarrassment.
"Good." Celestia beamed happily. "Now, to avoid discharging such an honored hero of Equestria, I've decided to take advantage of the popular support for you to push for a repeal of Parliament's 'Don't Ask, Don't Tell' policy and allow gay ponies to serve openly in our armed forces!"
"That's great, Your Maj—" He blinked. "What?"
"As the first openly gay servicepony, you are blazing the way for others to live their lives without hiding who they really are! I've always believed that everypony should have a chance to love anypony they want, so long as it's consensual. Good luck, Captain!" Celestia waved her mane at him and walked out of the room, trying desperately to keep a straight face.
Rarity swooned. "The wounded warrior and his heart's fondest desire! It's all so romantic! Ta–ta, Captain! I'll send Goldengrape your regards!" She turned and cantered out merrily, closing the door behind her.
Thunderball stared at the doorway in front of him, occasionally hearing a rustling sound from the other side of his curtain. After several long minutes, he pushed open the curtains to see Bonling lying on her side and watching the night sky.
"Bonling?" he asked tersely.
The changeling turned around to face him, her nervousness showing in her alien eyes. "Y–Yes?"
"Thanks." He spoke so quickly that Bonling was unsure if she had actually heard it.
"It was nothing," she said bashfully. "Oh, and Captain? Congratulations on your promotion, as well as on finding your very special somepony."
Thunderball threw his pillow at Bonling and hit her in the face.
