> Tears of the sun > by GnollReader > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- > The first of many > -------------------------------------------------------------------------- Celestia looked over the walls of her room, the portraits of her family and past watching her in her loneliness, a sad memento to the things that had transpired. No matter how much she tried to remember the times spent together in happiness, no matter how much she tried to remember her smile, Celestia still felt her heart break whenever she saw her face on the old paintings. Celestia hung her head, and cried to herself in silence. Should she have been more understanding? Why had she failed to see it approach? How could she have failed to see the change in her? Why hadn't she come to talk to her? How could they have grown so distant to one another without her noticing? Had she not sworn to be watchful and caring? A tear escaped Celestia's eye, one of so many spent in these last hours. Celestia felt a wave of frustration and anger wash over herself. It was her fault, she had expected too much of her... she should have been there for her, and she should have found another way, a better way! She felt her heart fall deeper into sadness... it was her own fault it had come to this... and she would never forgive herself for letting it come this far. There was a soft knock on the door, and after a pause a guard carefully poked his head inside, "My princess..." Celestia looked up, trying in vain to hide her sadness from her subjects. They of all, did not deserve to see her like this. They had already suffered enough, and this was her burden to carry... hers alone. "Is it time?" she asked, her voice almost faltering. The guard gave a sad nod, "It is, my princess..." He watched his princess stand up and walk towards him with quiet steps. She would never show it to them, but he knew that she was suffering more than any of them... and it broke his heart to see her like this. All of them only wanted her to be happy... but they felt just as powerless as her at what had happened. And as much as he and all of her subjects wished to see her smile again, they all knew that there was nothing they could do to ease her pain. The smile of their sun would never be the same again. --- Celestia walked through the hallways of the ancient castle, the walls echoing with each of her tired steps. The damage to the castle wasn't great, it could be repaired... but she simply couldn't bear the thought of staying here... the memories attached to it were too painful. They would build a new castle someplace different, and hopefully, with time at least her subjects would forget the terror that had fallen over them only a day ago... Celestia knew she would not be able to forget. As she passed an open balcony, Celestia stopped for a moment to look at the garden below. Her passing sun basked it in a golden light, but the warmth it spread as it approached the horizon went unnoticed by her. It was idyllic to look at, but she only felt sorrow. Her gaze followed the old maze of the garden. His statue still stood there, hidden from the world and watching in silence, as if mocking her failure... His loss had been a terrible day to the both of them, but it wasn't nearly as painful as this. She eyed her garden for another, sad moment... watching as her sun basked the world in its golden rays. So much had been lost... their race, their parents... even him... the elements... and now, her. What more sacrifices would her duties demand of her? What else had she left to lose after this, other than her life and her soul? Celestia's thoughts went to her subjects... how much more pain would the future bring them? And would she be the one causing it, now that she was the only one left? Celestia felt another tear run down her cheek as she closed her eyes and continued to walk down the corridor, the garden disappearing from her view. She felt lost, her wisdom, knowledge and hopes useless and lying shattered before her. All of her power had only given her more pain. She could move mountains with nothing but her will, the sun that gave the world life moved at her command... but she had still failed to keep those she loved safe... and she had lost their love. Up ahead, she could see the doors leading to the main balcony. Celestia felt the weight on her heart increase at what she had to do next. Never had she thought it would one day come to this... How would history talk of them once they had passed on? Would there be kind words of understanding, sadness and sympathy over her loss? Or would the future generations only see her failure? What would her mother have said? These days, Celestia often found herself wondering if they should have disappeared along with the rest of their race. Each step she took towards the old doors became painful, each of her quiet steps an eternity to her as countless thoughts and memories raced through Celestia's head. For a moment, she stopped in her steps and stared straight ahead, trying hard to find an answer to the question she dared not to ask. "Was there no other way?" she whispered to herself. The old walls of the castle gave no answer... they didn't need to, she already knew the terrible truth before she asked. It had been the only thing she could do... but she would never forgive herself for doing it. Celestia hung her head and a silent prayer escaped her lips, she could only hope for the future now. She walked up to the doors, the guards posted next to them bowing silently and pulling them open to let her pass. She stepped onto the balcony, and looked up to see her sun touch the horizon. Celestia drew in a deep breath, the warm air doing nothing to lessen the cold she felt. Her magic flared up, and her mind reached out far, passing beyond the mountains and through the sky. Celestia reached out for her sun, and it responded to her call. Slowly, the sun started to disappear from the sky, and night fell over the world. Releasing her grip of the sun, Celestia's mind reached out again... and the memory of her sister appeared before her eyes. They had suffered so much, but they had always been together in their pain... finding comfort in the presence of the other. Celestia felt her mind touch the object of her sorrow... They had always been there for one another... For the first time in what would be a thousand years to come, Celestia raised the moon. For the first time in her life, Celestia felt truly alone.