Short Shorts

by Coranth

65. Don't Blink (Nightmare Night Special)

"Did I ever tell you the story of the Weeping Alicorns?"

As Sweetie Belle, Applebloom, Scootaloo and I sat about the Campfire - set in the little campsite within Ponyville Park - little Sweetie slowly shook her head. "Nooo..." she murmured, eyes wide with childlike wonder, "I don't think we've heard that one, Dave! Will you tell us?"

"Well... it is Nightmare Night..." I hedged.

"Please..." Sweetie said, giving me the dreaded puppy dog eyes.

"Tell us!" Demanded Applebloom.

"Yeah, tell us!" Chimed in Scootaloo.

"Well... all right," I replied, and the three fillies cheered. And thus, I began.

"The Weeping Alicorns, it is said, are older than the Princesses. Older than Equestria. Older than even the Universe itself..."

At this, Scootaloo interrupted. "Pfah," she snorted, "nopony can be that old..."

"Ah," I replied, "but the Weeping Alicorns aren't really Alicorns at all. They aren't even ponies. They are, in fact, aliens... and as I said, they're older than the Universe itself. They exist only to kill other Ponies..."

"K-Kill?" stuttered Applebloom.

"Yes," I continued, "and they do it by simply touching you. When they touch you, you're sent back to the past to live out your life there; then they feed off the energy of the life you would have lived here."

"Humph!" Scootaloo scoffed. "That doesn't sound so bad."

"Really?" I replied. The little orange pegasus nodded. "So," I continued, "you'd be happy in a place where there's nothing familiar? Where nopony knows you? Where your friends aren't... because they won't be born for a long, long time?"

At this, Scootaloo shook her head and cuddled closer to her three friends in a group hug. "Uh-uh," she whimpered. All three fillies nodded; they didn't like the sound of that!

"B-But... couldn't we just run away from the Weeping Alicorns?" Sweetie Belle asked.

At her question, I shook my head. "No," I replied, "you see the Weeping Alicorns are fast - faster than the Princesses, faster than even Rainbow Dash - faster than you can believe... and what's worse... you might not even know they're there... until it's too late."

"Why?" asked Applebloom.

"Because, Applebloom, the Weeping Alicorns have the perfect defense," I answered. "You see, whenever somepony looks at them they become what's called 'Quantum Locked' - they literally freeze into rock and become statues - it's a fact of their biology; what they are. You can't kill stone statues. Of course, a statue can't kill you either... but then you turn your head away. Then you blink. And oh, yes it can... But the thing is, when they're frozen... what you think might be a Weeping Alicorn... could in fact be a real statue. And what you think might be a real statue... could actually be a Weeping Alicorn..."

Now the Cutie Mark Crusaders were trembling; they finally 'got' what made the Weeping Alicorns so terrifying. Suddenly, Scootaloo piped up, "Wait! You said that when somepony looks at them, they turn into statues. What if they somehow looked at each other?"

"Smart filly," I stated, and Scoot blushed at my praise. "Yes, that's one weakness you can try to exploit. Whenever you see a Weeping Alicorn, they always have a forehoof covering their eyes, because if they were to look at each other, then yes, they would become statues and you could escape--unless of course they cloak themselves in darkness..." I chuckled softly, then returned my attention to the Cutie Mark Crusaders only to find that they were staring, pale and terrified at a spot behind me. "What?" I asked.

Sweetie Belle raised a hoof to point behind me.

I slowly turned to look.

There, a few feet away from us... I saw IT; stone-grey, clad in a simple toga, a forehoof covering its eyes. A Weeping Alicorn.

"Don't move," I whispered. "Don't turn your back. Don't run away. And don't blink. Blink, and we're dead. Whatever you do, don't blink!" Always keeping the Alicorn in sight, I slowly moved around the campfire to where the fillies were seated, pale and trembling. As I neared them, however, a sudden chill wind nearly extinguished the fire's light--and that instant was enough! The Alicorn moved; one moment it was a few feet from us, the next it was right there with terrible, fang-filled jaws opened wide and forehoof extended to touch...

We screamed... and then, the 'Weeping Alicorn'... dropped to the ground, howling with laughter! "Oh," howled she, "you should see your faces!"

Only one Alicorn, I knew, could pull off this act. "TWILIGHT SPARKLE... YOU PLOTHOLE!" I raged, but my anger only made the 'Weeping Alicorn' - a cleverly disguised Twilight Sparkle - laugh harder! "Oh - ha-ha-ha - wait 'till I tell the girls about this!"

Comments

[Taliesin of the Forest]

Weeping Alicorns

Well, shit *takes running jump off cliff*

"YOU'LL NEVER TAKE ME ALIVE!"

[AMinorDisChord]

Where is doctor whooves when we need him