Short Shorts

by Coranth

184. Night Guard

The diminutive grey thestral mare - who'd been assigned as my night guard by Princess Luna whilst I was staying here in the Royal Palace - looked up at me, awaiting my response to what she'd said. For a moment, I looked at her dumbly. Then, "What?" I asked. "Could you please repeat that?"

Blushing deeply, her leathery, bat-like wings twitching with her nervousness as she scuffed the ground with a hoof, Whisper Song inhaled a breath and then repeated, "I--I'm... I'm a petophile, sir. I... I love being petted by humans..." Suddenly, it was as if a floodgate burst open; with those words the poor mare kept talking, starting to sob a little, tears filling her eyes as she continued, "I love to be petted by humans; I love the way your hands feel as they run through my coat; the way your fingers feel as they comb through my mane; the way your skin feels against my fur when I... when I..." An anguished noise escaped her before she continued, "I... I used to work as a Pet Therapy Pony!" she rasped. "I let adults and children pet me gently all over and got paid for it, yes, but I loved it so, so much; it helped them and they all adored me and all I had to do was act a little like a feral pony. I... at first I was unsure about it all but after a while I began to love it; being cared for and fed and petted by the hospital staff and patients... Then... then my family found out..."

Here, Whisper Song's lips drew back into a terrible snarl, revealing her fangs as her words turned bitter. "My Mother and Father, oh they were furious! Heaven forbid that a pony of their Noble House" she spat, "would spend time with commoners as a lowly animal! Without warning I was pulled from a job I loved to one I barely tolerated! 'Being a Guard of the Princesses is a great honour!' they said. Oh, sure, if you like guarding doors all day, or Nobles who treat you like furniture, or even the damn Princesses who either couldn't care less or just use us as eye candy!" Eyes narrowed to slits, years of frustration and rage pouring from frothy lips, she continued, "The damn Princesses don't need guards; they're alicorns for Faust's sake--and being a Night Guard is the worst! Nopony ever comes to Night Court; nor any humans and I MISS BEING PETTED, I WANT TO BE PETTED!!!" With a frustrated final scream, poor Whisper Song collapsed to the floor, buried her head in her forehooves and wept tears of anguish.

Feeling somewhat heartbroken myself - though the night was hot and I was stripped down to my underwear - I made to get out of bed to comfort her--but then, my eyes widened as the shadows in the corner of the room grew longer, and then pony-shaped, before coalescing into the form of Princess Luna. Immediately, I made to warn poor Whisper Song that the Princess was here--but to my surprise, Luna shook her head, mouthed "Don't!", and then winked at me before she barked like a Drill Seargeant, "NIGHT GUARD WHISPER SONG, ATTEN-HUT!"

A half-sob, half-whinny of terror escaping her, poor Whisper Song immediately snapped to her hooves and spun to face her Princess, a hoof raised in salute, her eyes so wide with fright that I couldn't see the gold, only her black, dilated pupils! "At ease, my Guard," Luna huffed; then - as poor Whisper Song did her best to comply, the Princess of the Night stalked around her, taking note of her fur, stained with tears, her reddened eyes, and the clicking of her armor's plates as she shivered with fear. "Knowest We this dreadful condition," Luna stated coldly, her words biting, angry as she inspected poor Whisper Song. "Thy shivering body, twitching wings, dilated pupils, drooped ears, weeping and much sadness. T'is known as 'Homo sapiens contactio absentia. Seen it before We hath, in many a so-called 'petophile.'" She snapped.

Then, "Haveth We here a lack of communication," she suddenly boomed, making Whisper Song squeak and jump. "Why were We not informed of thy condition?!" she barked, rhetorically. "Had We known of this, We wouldst never have recruited thou! It seems we shall be engaging in... much needed discourse... with the pony whom sent thee with a rather hastily written letter of Draft to Our Guard Offices on behalf of a Noble House! Hmmph! 'Please induct this juvenile delinquent...'--mine flank!" Princess Luna snorted. "But that shall come in time. Now... as for thou..." she leaned forward as poor Whisper Song leaned back, a half-sob escaping the poor Guardsmare. "... thy condition is most severe indeed - dire, in fact - so much so that treatment must begin--immediately!"

When Luna spoke the words, "Homo sapiens contactio absentia" - though she was still utterly terrified - it suddenly dawned on Whisper Song that the poor mare had been played - Luna wasn't here to punish her; she was playing, in her own way, a gentle prank - and so the thestral mare, waited - 'quivering with 'fear' - for the Night Princess's next words. "NIGHT GUARD WHISPER SONG," the Princess barked. "ARMOR... OFF!" Something akin to a half-whinny, half-laugh, half-sob escaping her, Whisper Song complied all-too-eagerly, hastily unbuckling and stripping off the hated armor, boots, and helm, a relieved groan escaping her as she cast it away; with the heavy armor off she just felt so much cooler, so much better. After giving her a moment to shake herself out and stretch freely, "NIGHT GUARD WHISPER SONG," the Princess barked again, "PRESENT... COAT!"

Another half-laugh escaping from her, the little thestral mare turned this way and that before us, presenting her grey coat for inspection and inspect it Luna did, stalking forwards to gently nose with her snoot, the most sensitive part of her muzzle. "T'is a little matted from the wearing of thine armor," the Princess stated, "but t'is nothing that a good brushing will not mend. Otherwise, excellent presentation; t'is washed, clean and very silky, perfect for human hands to run through!" Her coat gleaming in the light of the fire's embers, Whisper Song blushed gently at the praise, eyes misty. Stepping back, Princess Luna snapped, "PRESENT... MANE!" Whinnying joyfully, Whisper Song reared before her Princess and I, shaking her head to 'fluff' and present her mane for display. Here, Princess Luna frowned, "'Helm-mane'", she tsked, "from - obviously - wearing of thy helmet; and the worst case We hath ever seen! T'is utterly disgraceful!" she crowed with well acted 'condemnation', pointing an accusing hoof.

"An excuse to have it combed judiciously via human distal phalanges no doubt--and to have thy scalp massaged beneath! For shame!" Smothering a grin and a laugh, Luna became as stone as she barked a final time, "PRESENT... TAIL!" At this, poor Whisper Song blushed deeply; then 'fluffed' and hiked her tail for inspection, something normally asked of by pony dams of their foals! Kindly, gently, and with the utmost professionalism, Princess Luna gave a cursory sniff to check for odors, then inspected Whisper Song's privates for smegma; upon finding none, she nodded with satisfaction. Then, the Princess gently ran hoof and snoot along the thestral mare's tail. A moment later, she stepped back to appraise Whisper Song once again as the little embarrassed thestral mare bashfully lowered her tail.

"Excellent!" Luna boomed. Then, "NIGHT GUARD WHISPER SONG, BED... FACE!" Without hesitation, my thestral guard smartly spun to face the bed in which I lay, planting her right forehoof firmly at the finish of her turn. For a moment, all was silent as she and I looked into each other's eyes, her own glistening, control maintained by a hair's breadth; she knew what was coming next.

"FOR-WARD... BED!" At once the thestral mare moved; she swiftly hopped up on the bed to stand there, perfectly balanced upon the sheets, then "DROP...BED! At ease; relax..." with a joyful half-sob, half nicker, she lay down on her side and cuddled close to me as I instinctively wrapped my arms about her, pulling her into my body's curve as she turned to face me, a little cry escaping her as she felt human hands - my hands - roam her coat. As I petted her, letting my hands comb over and through her mane and coat, little breathy sighs and moans, giggles, and an occasional sob of relief escaped her as she nuzzle, nuzzle, nuzzled me over and over and over. Soon, as I gently scratched her behind the ears, and ran my hands all over, then through her mane to massage her scalp she moaned, stretched out against me to wedge her muzzle under my arm and wept gentle tears of relief, as at last, her need was satisfied.

What followed was... well... porn without any actual porn. I didn't just pet Whisper Song; I made love to her with my hands, as she rolled wherever she would, wanting me to touch her everywhere; her chest, back, sides, flanks, rump, her belly and even her udders saw my attention, the little thestral shuddering gently, moan-sobbing as I lavished them with delicate squeezes, before moving my hands up to rub her belly--again. Later, once little Whisper Song had calmed - as she lay atop me, letting me pet her full-body with long gentle strokes, dreamily lick-lick-licking the sweat from my chest - Luna, laying abed with us, her own eyes misty at being able to witness something so astounding yet so gentle, sniffled, before she said, "Private Whisper Song, we dismiss thee from Our Royal Guard." The words were enough to make the little bat pony mare raise her head - perhaps to voice a protest - but before she could, the Princess of the Night continued, "We discharge thee from our Royal Guard with full honors, and instead charge thee with a new Commission: If Thou wishest, Thou shalt become the companion-pony of this human, David. Thou shalt become his rightful guard and companion here in Equestria, and shalt travel with him beyond when he chooses to leav--OOF!"

The bed shook as Luna was subjected to a class ten thestral tackle-hug; laughter roared up deep from her barrel as little Whisper Song nuzzle-nuzzled all over her, foal like, joyous enough to burst. "Thankyouthankyouthankyouthankyouthankyouthankyouthankyou!" she sobbed through happy tears. "Thou art..." now Luna was crying, too even as she gently nuzzled us both, "Thou art most welcome!" Then it was Luna who gently moved and shifted this way and that, gently encouraging me to pet her as Whisper Song looked on with a critical eye; until at last, both mares lay with their heads on either side of my chest, humming contentedly. That way, together, we slept.

Author's Note:

Could I commission an artist to draw up an olden-style manual or manuscript - similar of sorts to the Karma Sutra - but instead it's a manual for humans to use when petting ponies of Equestria; full of G-rated petting 'positions' and petting/massage techniques? (I am being serious; something like that would be both funny and really awesome to have.)

Comments

[eighter]

i hope we get to see more of this world. like a certen house getting there just rewards

[Carpinus Caroliniana]

Like I said, it's really obvious you love petting pones.

But I do like this idea of a Pony who requires petting so such a degree that they cannot normally function. You might want to explore this "Pet Therapy Pony" angle a bit more though.

[Coranth]

8515363

It's not that ponies "can't function" without being petted; they can, it's just that petting calms them down if they're stressed or angered, or if they just want some companionship. It's like someone who drinks coffee but hasn't had one in the morning; yes, they can function, but "man, I really need a coffee," or "damn, a coffee would be nice right about now..." In this case, the petophile pony thinks often about being petted and, after having worked hard all day, doesn't go to the spa, or go home and watch a film; he or she goes and finds a human who will pet them for a good long while.

Whisper Song's reaction was not like that of a drug addict without heroin; the whole "Homo Sapiens Contactio Absentia" thing was Luna playing a joke; being oh-so-dire, oh-so-serious and hamming it all up to make the little thestral mare's "condition" seem oh-so-much-worse! then things actually were; playing a joke and everyone's in on it! As for poor Whisper Song herself...

After having been a Pet Therapy Pony, surrounded by human adults and children who lavished upon her more love then she'd ever gotten from her own family, through hugs, petting, feeding little tidbits etc. - her transfer to the Night Guard was boredom, indifference from Nobles, and worst of all... no more petting, being told she was loved and a good pony, being fed little treats, brushed and doted upon... She missed it all terribly, so her reaction was unusual, borne of a combination of anger, frustration, and loneliness.