Chapter 10: Acceptance
CHAPTER 10: ACCEPTANCE
Eve stood petrified in place after she'd made it outside the mysterious chamber. She expected there to be destruction, it was only natural in her methods of escape; but was she ready to become a killer? Although she had her confidence in the matter, the idea of actually taking a life still jarred her; for pinned against the wall by a piece of sharp debris was a ebon black pony with thick armor plating.
She looked up at him; speechless as she saw his limp body remain there, elevated, dangling, lifeless. The blood protruded from his wound onto the floor; and she could only stand there in place, in shock that she'd actually done this.
She thought she was ready to do whatever it took to escape? She thought she could dedicate herself to the ideal of reforming this very society? Yet she couldn't even handle the death of somepony she'd never even met right here in front of her. She was a weakling, a coward; and the things that she'd seen in that room only caused her confidence to wane even further. Death was to become her familiar if she wanted to succeed, but was she ready to accept that? The fact she didn't even know who this pony was only seemed to make it worse. Was he a good noble pony? Or was he evil? Would he have helped her escape? Did he have any trace family? Who was he?
Either way she was responsible for taking everything he once was; and smashing it all to pieces.
She was the one who'd committed the crime; she was the killer at fault. Eve just continued to look up at him, and she didn't know how to put her feelings into words as she stood in front of his limp body. She attempted to reach out to him with her paw, to run it down his face; but as she only saw that severed wrist wrapped in a thin crystal layer, it only reminded her of the horrible reality she'd already committed herself to. She looked up at him, and thankfully his bangs covered his lifeless eyes, but that didn't make things any easier. She wanted to say something; but sorry didn't feel like enough. "M-Mister...I..."
Eve then felt the tears trickle down her face again as she shuddered. She didn't want to cry; she didn't want to feel that weakness again, didn't want to accept the fact she was still vulnerable. She wanted to feel strong, to be able to have some confidence in herself, but the more she thought about it, the weaker she became. And her own tears are what frightened her the most; she backed up from the body, attempting to wipe them away as they came. But they only continued to flow down her face. "I....I....-" and as she slipped and fell in the pool of blood, she saw the thick red substance mix in with her own coat, and her severed paw laid next to her; giving her a sense of clarity of the severity of the situation.
She broke down again, and she could never find the words she wanted to say to that pony; she only continued to attempt to wipe the tears away as she remained there for some time, weeping to herself, her cries becoming more hoarse and violent as her sobbing progressed. And the more she attempted to wipe away her tears, the more her snow white mane became stained with the blood of her victim, as well as her face.
Revealing the face of a killer; the former shell of a child, a true monster.
Eve eventually just let her arms drop to the floor as she remained on her knees, the sickly red paste covered majority of her body. She closed her eyes, letting off a piercing cry as she looked upward; no longer attempting to stop the tears, allowing herself to sob in front of this lifeless corpse. If he deserved anything, he deserved this; to know that she was sorry, and she hoped that if there were any possible way, that he could see her grieve for him.
While she slowly came to terms with the gravity of taking this life, behind her buried beneath a pile of rubble, laid a fluffy pony and a supposed bat pony, both unconscious, but both thankfully still alive from the horrid ordeal.
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"This is candy."
The baby draconequus sluggishly made her way down the halls of this sector of the castle; and she didn't seem to be in any sort of rush, actually perhaps the exact opposite. She looked as if she'd lost all the motivation to keep herself going, simply reflecting on her own thoughts and concerns. Her eyes revealed nothing, no hint of emotion, no passive regret, they were simply cold, lifeless like the pony she'd murdered. As she only continued to walk, her body steadily swaying from side to side with each sluggish step; her blood drenched coat and mane was already beginning to dry. She was thinking of her past again, and everything seemed so foreign now that she'd come to such a dark point in her life.
Memories of peace, love, and happiness, it all felt like childish dreams at this point, and a pointless goal. She no longer held her paw; simply holding her frail wrist with her claw as her left arm was folded halfway across her chest, as if she were attempting to find comfort in her own embrace. She'd left her paw in the pool of blood, not even caring to take it with her in this poorly planned escape. All she did was dwell on times that had long since passed.
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In an anonymous cavern located in the equestrian wilds, there were two abnormally large & slender figures observing something in particular with their arms crossed. Although the cave didn't seem to bare any remarkable features; it was still a very special place to a particular baby draconequus. It was the place of her birth, and the last place she'd seen her real parents.
The baby draconequus was attempting to manifest something in her paw with her chaotic birthright, but judging by the disappointed looks on her parent's faces; she still couldn't seem to get it quite right.
"She still can't understand the basic concept of candy manifestation dear; do you think something's the matter?" Inquired a larger female draconequus, obviously presumed to be the baby's mother.
The baby draconequus looked up at her mother from afar; and it was almost as if she could understand her words based solely off her expression. This compelled her to attempt the manifestation spell once again, she bit on the tip of her tongue focusing all her willpower on the task. But no matter how hard she tried, at this moment in time she still couldn't seem to grasp the method of candy manifestation. She looked at her paw only conjure up dust before her, her expression saddened as she looked down, ashamed.
Her mother also couldn't hide her disappointment in her child; seeing as this was something most draconequus could master even during their infancy. "Mmmnn...I don't understand, what's wrong with you little one?"
Suddenly a larger male draconequus; presumed to be the baby's father, spoke out with an amused expression. "Look at the signs love. Frailty, lack of understanding, this land is obviously cursed with such creatures. I told you I'd rather have you birth her in the air rather than coming to this blasted place."
The mother gasped as she looked to her lover in an offended manner. "What!? Now don't you start turning towards superstitious myths for explanation. But...-" As she turned to look back down at her child once more, she couldn't help but reveal some signs of worry due to her lover's words. "She does harbor very peculiar traits darling. She cannot fly, she cannot make food, perhaps she is sick? I would not risk taking her back to the other's, perhaps it's contagious?...."
He snickered somewhat afterwords. "Well of course I'm not seriously considering the possibility of this land being cursed love, but; the explanation is fairly simple. Remember what Havoc had told us a couple of years back? It is certainly possible to have one such child born out of the bunch."
She then cocked a brow at him curiously as she laid on her side, then tapping her child on the head softly with her claw. "Would you look at her though dear? She wouldn't last one week out there on her own. I realize none of our other children had this problem; but still- remember, it is the ponies that were able to develop magic of their own and drive our race to the far reaches of the world."
The father cut in with a scoff. "Hah; with the help of about five other different races might I add!"
She shrugged with a smirk. "You have a point." Then pausing for a moment as she looked her baby draconequus in the eyes, lifting her up with telekinetic magic almost in a curious manner, looking her over. "Dear, what do you think ever happened to that Discord fellow? He was considered a genius amongst our youth, was he not?"
His eyes widened as he then leaned back against the cavern wall; conjuring an apple as he munched on it heartily before shrugging. "Discord? You mean Eris's little brat? I heard he ended up just like her, getting bested by a bunch of ponies no less." The draconequus then threw the rest of his apple into the air, catching it in his mouth.
The mother's expression sunk as she heard those words, she continued to spin her baby midair in a playful manner effortlessly as she spoke. "Oh did he now? That's too bad; I really liked him, he seemed like a funny character. I remember as kids he always used to talk and talk and talk. He really was like Eris wasn't he?" She then seemed to be reflecting on the past, lost in a moment of nostalgia. "You know, it wasn't so bad back then...."
The father then to seemed to be reflecting back on some things. "Hah; yea, but our lives now aren't bad either love." He made his way over to his lover as they embraced for a moment, nuzzling one another.
The baby draconequus only continued to watch her parents curiously; wide eyed.
Her mother stood; looking down at her child with a saddened look before sighing heavily.
Her father shook his head looking down at his daughter. "It is unfortunate, but she wouldn't last a second with her siblings either love and you know it. You heard what the others said, every now and then there is one such as this, we cannot blame ourselves for bringing forth such a child, we're only lucky that we ended up having her here away from the rest."
She nodded in contempt. "Indeed; she is perhaps the furthest thing from a genius, perhaps life experience truly is the only cure. But I won't leave her here to starve darling. Although her understanding of her powers is disappointingly minimal, I'm sure if we dedicate ourselves to the task we can at least teach her how to feed herself."
The father placed a paw over his face as he groaned slightly. "Look at us, teaching a draconequus how to use the power of her imagination. How laughable; thank heavens the others aren't here to see this."
The mother rolled her eyes once again as she then looked to her child with impatience as she cocked a brow at her. "Now watch closely little one." She then placed her paw in front of her baby's face, soon after manifesting a piece of candy in her paw with a soft smile. "This is candy....can you create the candy?"
The baby draconequus looked at the sugary delicacy with wide eyes as she looked up at her mother, nodding to her in understanding. "C-Candy...yes; candy. I can I can!" She then attempted to create the piece of candy in a similar fashion to her mother, but once again came up short after her attempt, only being able to conjure up dust.
Her father couldn't help but snicker beneath his breath. "I can't believe this- I was able to fly immediately after seeing my parents do it, and this was during infancy. She can't even grasp the basic concept of food. It's a hopeless case love." He then turned towards the entrance of the cavern shaking his head.
The mother sighed once more as she to was a little puzzled by her draconequus's clueless innocence. Even as infants they were able to have an almost immediate grasp on their powers, yet this child, their child, couldn't even seem to create candy, and her intelligence was easily subpar in draconequus standards. "You'll need to make this to survive; you understand? All it takes is a little imagination, you can do it if you try hard enough, no more playing around little one."
The baby draconequus then looked at her mother worriedly as she thought about it for a moment, and she thought she understood what she meant. She then raised her tiny paw and claw and then attempted to manifest some candy, but once again wasn't able to create anything but dust. This caused her to whimper as she sat looking at the ground and closed her eyes, lowering her head in disappointment of herself.
And her parents certainly were disappointed.
Her mother just let off a soft sigh as she stood once again folding her arms. "Perhaps it's a problem with the brain?"
The father shrugged, caring little for the matter. "Or perhaps it's just bad luck, either way darling it doesn't matter, we cannot stay here attempting to teach her forever, we must get back. I don't trust Havoc with the kids, you know how he is."
The mother nodded plainly as she turned to look at him, then back down at her child. "I miss them dearly as well. But I don't want to leave this one to fend for herself without at least knowing how to make food, that is just too sad. But I can't imagine how her siblings would react to such ignorance of one's own powers." She lowered her frame once again. "Alright darling, just give me the time to attempt to teach her this one simple thing, we can leave afterwords, I promise."
The father only groaned as he sighed heavily. "Ah, alright fine fine, but let's just try to hurry this up, I want to get back home already, every second in this pony filled land fills me with annoyance."
The mother chuckled. "Alright..." But as she regarded her baby once more she sighed as she prepared to go to work. "Alright, let's try this again little one." She summoned it in her paw. "This is candy, candy...all it takes is a little imagination."
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Eve still made her way down that same hall, and at the far end she could finally see a pair of stairs leading up to a different part of the castle, that was good enough for her. She was ready to leave now, and she felt now that she'd reflected on some things she finally had a good idea of what it took to succeed. Her whole life so far had been a collection of numerous mistakes, it'd been the accumulation of endless misery; but now she understood everything. She understood what it meant to learn and grow as a draconequus, and her parents saw her as a slow learner, indeed she was. But that's not what mattered most to her at this point; it was the fact they told her all it required was a little imagination.
Imagination.
She'd seen things, things most ponies would probably never witness their entire lives; and it didn't have to be all bad. It means they lacked creativity, they didn't have as much possibilities at their hooves as she did even with her one claw. Chaos was her birthright, her potential was limitless if she willed it so, all she did was lack imagination, a system, something to organize everything into a deadly and beneficial process of eliminating her foes. And now she had the perfect method in doing so, she knew just what she could do in order to bring an end to this little farce between them. They all claimed she was a monster, claimed that her destiny was to be like this, then they'd get what they wanted. But it wouldn't be as simple as that; she had her own goals in mind, and although she was afraid and unsure of herself; she could feel her motivation rising again at the thought of finally accepting everything. It all made sense now.
And if they wanted to call her insane, then so be it, she welcomed that insanity at this point in her life.
Eve then recalled a familiar scene with the mysterious draconequus Eris; how fitting it all seemed now. And how foolish Eve felt she was back then, to deny Eris's claims, to believe that following Cheerilee's example would benefit her in anyway.
No she was a child, and she lacked experience.
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Eris sat in her throne with her arms crossed; regarding the baby draconequus on the circular platform with a serious look, then stating in a cold tone. "You will die Eve."
Eve's pupils dilated as she felt a shiver run down her spine.
Eris continued. "Unless you accept my gifts in full." She paused for a moment, before cocking her head to the left with a sigh. "You can no longer be afraid of using your powers, or worry about what others think of you. You must realize that in order for you to get what you want, you must kill to survive. Your innocence is something that I value, but I would much rather see you accept reality rather than perish here. Your mother however, is a complication, and I fear that your attachment to her will cost you everything. But the trials ahead matter little unless you deal with the ones set before you now. This world holds many secrets Eve, secrets younglings such as yourself couldn't grasp in a thousand years. The rulers of this world and the secrets they hide are; beyond comprehension. And as you are now, you're not ready to face such a world, and the ones who inhabit it."
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Back then she was foolish, childish, and her words didn't prove otherwise.
But now; she understood those secrets, she saw the world for what it was for creatures such as herself.
She was ready.
Eve made her way up the marble tiled stairs and arrived at a stone door with a runic marking similar to the one of that mysterious room the princess had left her in. Eve placed her claw over that door and closed her eyes.
And in a fleeting moment, obliterated it.
And this one was far easier to destroy compared to the last.
I see everything now.
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As she made her way outside the hidden halls she was previously trapped in, the baby draconequus found herself in the Canterlot throne room, and a multitude of guests already waiting for her upon arrival. She regarded them with a bored expression, and she was actually quite disappointed to see the princess wasn't here with them. She looked to her left, noticing that at the far end of the room was a porch; perfect means for an escape. But first she'd have to deal with the guards that blocked her only exit. "Please move; you're all in my way." She stated simply.
The guards didn't budge as they all unsheathed their lances and pointed them at the little draconequus. Majority of them were trembling, seeing as she was covered in blood.
One of the guards replied to the draconequus however in an angered tone. "Submit and we just might let you live!"
Eve cocked a brow at him curiously. "Is that so?" She then snapped her claw as above her appeared a large raincloud, which drenched her with downpour, practically cleaning the baby draconequus off of all the blood as a heavy wind picked up around her, drying her off. Suddenly manifesting over the baby draconequus was a crimson top-hat and cloak, with the cloak being decorated with stars in similar fashion to Trixie. Beneath the cloak itself she wore a small black hoody to provide further warmth and comfort; one baring similar appearance to the one Cheerilee had given her long ago. "Have you ever killed anypony before mister?"
To this the guard's eyes widened as his gaze shifted; and he thought about that question for a moment. He then looked back to the baby draconequus, a little annoyed he was being talked down to by a child. "It doesn't matter! You're obviously outnumbered and outmatched. You can't hope to escape, so don't do anything stupid kid!"
Eve cocked her head to the left with a soft giggle; looking at him with a slight sneer. "I thought so." She paused, "But I'm sorry; I don't really want to play with ponies anymore, they've been really mean to me. So I think I'll be going now." The baby draconequus then manifested a flaming crystal candy cane in her claw as she pointed it outward and then began to approach them; chuckling beneath her breath with that same sneer. "You see mister, you lack understanding."
The lunar guard took utter offense to this, although there were some in the group that actually turned and ran at the sight of the flaming crystal candy cane. The steadfast leader however held his ground along with a few others. "We won't let you pass! It's our duty to guard this city during the night, and I'm certain the princesses will be here any minute to put a stop to your menace! So come if you want kid! We're more than ready to give you a little harsh punishment!"
The baby draconequus then elevated herself in the air in a swift motion as she passed over the group of guard ponies. She looked down at them with a sinister look; a fierce grin plastered across her face as she licked her lips. "Hehe, let them come."
__________________________________________________________
Standing outside the castle, still huddled in a small group but accompanied by numerous guards was Twilight and the others. Twilight however was pacing back and forth nervously as she gritted her teeth in irritation. "What's this about Princess Celestia and Luna not being present? Why aren't they telling me anything?!"
Fluttershy attempted to calm her friend down seeing as Twilight was making a scene. The sound of an explosion already causing quite a commotion as the citizens were gathering around the castle to see what all the fuss was about.
Fluttershy raised a hoof at Twilight cautiously. "T-Twilight, I'm sure that Princess Cele-"
Twilight snapped at the mare on impulse. "Don't you get it Fluttershy? Something big is going on here and the princesses are keeping us out of the loop on purpose. I swear once I see Princess Celestia I'm going to get some answers..."
Fluttershy flinched. "Eep!"
Cheerilee's face distorted into an annoyed expression as she glared at Twilight in annoyance. "Hmph...that's funny..."
Zecora looked to Cheerilee worriedly, shaking her head. "Cheerilee; I can understand your need to debate. But perhaps that issue can wait."
Cheerilee gritted her teeth, snarling a little. "No it can't wait Zecora!" She then stomped over to Twilight getting in the mare's face. "Speaking of demanding answers! I demand some from you this instant Twilight Sparkle! You've avoided it long enough, it's about time you start owning up to what you've-"
And suddenly interrupting the scene, was a multitude of bodies flying from the porch of the Canterlot throne room, followed by the screams of the guards who were being flung from it. This caused ponies to gasp in horror at the sight as the bodies of the lunar guard clunked and fell to the concrete floor; majority of them groaning in pain as they laid there.
Twilight and the others looked on as shocked as the rest of them, before looking up towards the porch.
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"Hiya ponies of Canterlot!" Standing on the porch with a cheerful smile was a baby draconequus dawned in a crimson cloak and funny top-hat. She raised her claw to the air with a wave of her candy cane as she levitated herself into the air and then chuckled. "Eve's my name and they like to call me insane! Hmhm." She then manifested a bouncy chair as she then proceeded to bounce on it with her eyes closed. "Well I was told it was my job to make sure all of you got what you deserved so-" and with a wave of her crystal candy cane, a series of explosions erupted across the city. "Bang Bang Bang!"
Cheerilee was frozen in place as she cried out to the baby draconequus. "E-Eve!? What're you doing!? Stop that this instant!" She was petrified by the scene and felt at a loss for words. There was no mistaking it was Eve, but why did she just? Cheerilee fell to the ground as she looked up in horror, tears swelling with her eyes as she shook her head. "W-What?...Why's she..."
Twilight looked back in horror herself as she to was at a loss for words, they all were. Her now beautiful home city attacked seemingly out of nowhere by the baby draconequus she knew was trouble to begin with. The same city she grew up in, the same city her family lived in! The rage boiled within Twilight as she seemed to be overcome with an intense bloodlust herself, and she looked up towards the baby draconequus with a glint of fierce anger.
Trixie however seemed to be a little worried about less important things. "Hey! Wait a second, that's a little like my look! Eve take that off this instant!" She then looked at Twilight then chuckled a little nervously. "Oh ehm...I mean...what do you think you're doing!?"
Zecora only continued to look on in disbelief as she soon regarded Eve with a serious look. Although she didn't want to become involved in a physical fight with the baby draconequus, it seemed that Eve wasn't going to give them much choice.
Fluttershy trembled as she lowered her frame and covered her head, looking up at Eve, actually frightened.
Eve cocked a brow at the crowd as she'd heard somepony call her name, and as she took notice of the all too familiar figures that were in that crowd; her expression sunk dramatically. "Momma?.....What's she-" Eve paused for a moment before rolling her eyes with a soft smirk as she looked to the upper left, as if humored by the idea. "Duh."
She then looked back down towards Cheerilee. "Hi momma! I'm sorry that you came a little too late, there's no turning back for me now." She closed her eyes. "I promise I won't hurt you though. I love you too much hmhm." She then smiled playfully as she waved at the others. "Hiya Zecora, I missed you to! And you to Fluttershy, Trixie!" She placed her claw over her bottom lip. "Can't say I missed you though Twilight Sparkle...."
Oh what an exciting situation! That princess sure liked to set up weird scenarios, where was she anyway? Perhaps she was busy with something else, either way it didn't matter. Eve continued to bounce on her bouncy chair as she looked at Twilight in specific; while spinning her candy cane around her wrist with a curious smile and wide eyes. "So what're you waiting for? Aren't you going to hurry up and come play with-"
Suddenly appearing behind the baby draconequus as she bounced were three ominous figures.
And it was as if the moment they'd appeared, Eve herself lost that playful demeanor she'd been portraying as her eyes returned to that cold emotionless state.
Princess Celestia's horn possessed a vibrant glow as she regarded the baby draconequus with a highly upset look. "Luna; Discord, she must be captured." She scowled somewhat. "I do hope you're prepared to take responsibility for your actions little Eve. I'll ensure you're disciplined properly next time."
Princess Luna's horn possessed a similar glow; except representing the colors of the night. And she didn't hesitate to hide her anger seeing that her subjects had been attacked as she charged the baby draconequus, flying forward at her sister's side. "I'll try not to be so rough sister!"
And Discord's paw crackled with destructive magic as he followed in suit. "I think we're giving her a little too much credit."
Eve glanced back at the three with interest "Hehe..." And she recalled something quite helpful.
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The pale cyan maned mare spoke in a humored tone. "Hehe, wait until Vinyl and Octavia wake up tomorrow morning! They'll never know what hit em!"
The one with light fuchsia highlights then spoke up in a confused tone. "Why are we even wearing ninja suits Lyra?"
The pale cyan maned mare revealed as Lyra Heartstrings eyes widened as she regarded her friend. "Duh Bon Bon, humans used these suits to blend in perfectly with the night, they practically phased with objects like this!"
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Eve stated humorously with a wave of her candy cane. "Ninja...."
And a cataclysmic explosion set off within the castle grounds.
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I THINK i may have posted this video here before... but its just so fitting.
NINJA!
(minute 1:37)
Finaly she stopped to be a pushover!! This will be interesting.
MOAR!
Also, poor Eve 
This is why you should always treat others like you want them to treat you. if she hadn't been portrayed as a monster by everyone it probably didn't need to be this way.
....So.....it begins....
*Adjusts Glasses*
Celestia....Prepare your Ass for imminent Obliteration!
heheh...Flaming JawBreakers shall RAIN FROM THE HEAVENS!!!
this is amazing!
KILL THEM ALL!!
This is why you should Beware The Nice Ones
Push someone too far, and you'll get your butt handed to you.
[youtube=FU2mn_S0kls]
You ruined a little girl, "Princess", be pride... be pride....
It's strange. I coulde be happy to see Eve kicks ass, but no, I feel her dispari, Cherliee despair. Good job EdenEcplise, it's hard have a this emparty ina fanfic
Did Celestia put her in that room, let her break out, and rampage Canterlot JUST to make her seem EVEl? No pony else knows that Celestia was torturing her, so they assume that she's gone insane. Celestia *picks up assault rifle* You are going down!
2572249
If that were true....
3.bp.blogspot.com/-PzHuA069qXo/TnIMubJA_rI/AAAAAAAAAnk/yFlceO83rdg/s1600/redlanterns.jpg
I do hope everyone finds out what a genocidal maniac Celestia is
ONORE CELESTIA! seriously what good did she think would come out of this, and man I feel really sorry for eve she's lost all hope now, I hope she can get that hope back, but I remember the author said that this would end bittersweet. and I also hope everyone finds out about celesias doing
I don't think the summary represents the tragedy of this story anymore...
YES! YES! YES! THE CHAOS NUKE WILL DESTROY ALL!!!
Or weaken them to near death... if.. if you don't mind
.
This story is getting too out of hand for my taste. Are you just making up the plot as you write along?
2573565
Actually nope; I've had everything planned since the beginning.
Sorry if it feels like I'm trying to make too much go on at once, it's kind of what I was going for. There's so many things I want to represent/cover in this fic; and I had a bad feeling it might feel like I'm stuffing information in your guys face. But I'm learning from this fic as well; and something I learned I must improve at, is portraying multiple characters at once.
If I may Chaotic; could I know what upsets you most?
I want to remember these things for future fics after I'm done with this one lol.
2573241
Yea I think I might have to re-edit that sometime in the future. Although I don't like the idea I was being manipulative, I really was never intending for friendship to be the "main" focus of the story, but more so a lesson in a sense. I also wanted the description to set the stage for the rest of the fic and not give any hints to future events. In actuality, I wanted the whole Eve's sanity thing to be a surprise for future character development. I thought you guys might've liked that.
2574100
I think the main problem I have with this story is actually the rapid switches you make with the characters. Like at one time, I would be reading from Eve's eyes, then it would switch to Trixie like literally a few seconds of reading.
Celestia's way of thinking is also seemingly unstable for a ruler that had kept Equestria at peace for nearly 1000 years. Seriously, you first made her intentions devious and plotting, put a blanket of motherliness over her when Celestia personally confronts Eve, and then make her go all "You need to be stopped" when Eve loses it in this chapter. I feel like Celestia's character isn't being very balanced at all, and you need to fix this.
Also, Discord seems to be playing a very small role in this story, despite the fact that he is a draconequus. I would of expected that he would stick around for more than that just one chapter. Even in this one, he seems to just another petty plot device that Celestia uses to attempt to subdue Eve. (At least, that's what I'm assuming at this point.) I don't think Discord would be the kind of guy to ignore another draconequus, and not have some fun with him/her. Heck, I was expecting Discord to have a few more chit-chats with Eve after the arena, but no. They didn't even talk in Canterlot Castle. Discord could have done that with his over-the-maximum-godly powers, but no. He chooses to ignore Eve. That doesn't fit well with his personality.
Even with Celestia keeping her reigns on Discord, I doubt she would stop him from having a friendly conversation with Eve.
I like the back story for this chapter.
When Eve's parents mentioned Discord I was all
-- then at "Eris' little brat" I was 
2574161
Oh! Thank you so much for writing this Chaotic, gives me a very clear picture on how you feel now.
Do you have any advice for scene transitions? That's literally why I use the line thing so people can at least brace themselves for the fact I'm going to attempt to go to a different characters perspective. But I really could use some tips for that, I'm sure it can feel quite confusing.
But about Princess Celestia! Please don't be mistaken, I don't want people to think her solution to all this is to just kill Eve and be done with it. I'm sorry if it came off that way.
"Luna; Discord, she must be captured." She scowled somewhat. "I do hope you're prepared to take responsibility for your actions little Eve. I'll ensure you're disciplined properly next time."
And the one who released that spell at the end was Eve. Although I won't hide the fact *Spoiler* Princess Celestia will be quite surprised by the baby draconequus's resort to amputation. I still want Princess Celestia to come off as a motherly figure, just an "extremely" harsh teacher. She doesn't want to torture Eve because she's "Kukuku, I'm evil maniacal genocidal maniac!" She has her reasons, they'll become more clear. But it also deals with appearances and securing a future for her subjects while ensuring the safety of future princesses if anything is to happen to her.
In a way, at this point *End of Chapter 10* She just looks at Eve as a stubborn child.
But when you have a stubborn child, you don't just kill them, you teach them etc.
Discord's role I won't deny. I have been purposely portraying him as the disinterested lackey but I personally like to feel that something Discord enjoys more than instigating chaos is watching Celestia play god. I'm a squee fan of their supposed love-hate (possibly romantic) relationship; so this is kind of just a personal taste I'm sure is present throughout the fic (sadly). Also this is why I felt incorporating the scene with Eve's parents would be helpful. In there I wanted to hint at Discord's supposedly ancient age, and my own personal headcanon revolving around Eris. Draconequus are no surprise to Discord, and he has seen them come and go his entire life. Although times today are very different from when he was young, in this story he has no particular attachment to them, he finds Celestia's involvement with Eve amusing, but Eve in particular, not as much. But something Eve says in the future will catch his complete interest.
I hope some of what I said could allow you to stick with this story for a bit longer.
2574321
Well one thing I can say about the character transitions is to use less of those line breaks. It's better to make the story feel like its a flowing river rather than slice it into pieces, than glue them together into a horribly edited indie movie.
For example, with the scene you had with Eve in the beginning of this chapter, it wasn't necessary to have those little dashes separating her paragraphs. We're still seeing from Eve's POV, so it was unnecessary to have those little dashes. All they did was succeeding in breaking the story's immersion.
Secondly, that scene in chapter 9?
There was no need to have that dash there cause it didn't feel like character transition at all. All that happened was that Trixie left the scene, leaving only Kel and Silver Shade on the stage.
Think of character transitions as you would in a play. When Character A leaves the stage and Characters B and C are still on it, the play still continues on without Character A cause Characters B and C are still on there playing out the story. You only do a transition when you switch to another character that wasn't on stage (like Character A).
Also, it's a bad idea to do a lot of rapid character transitions to begin with. Let's think about it from a play's perceptive again. If you keep switching from character to character as they leave, won't that tire the actors out? That's what I'm feeling while reading this story.
2574500
Crap so it's actually doing the exact opposite of what I wanted it to do.
I'll probably go back and start removing the dashes, but I'm still a little puzzled on what would probably be best for the different character's perspectives. I want to be able to cover multiple perspectives, so maybe sticking with one perspective per chapter is best? But that'd result in much shorter chapters probably; people might also get a bit confused seeing as then characters may tend to appear out of nowhere.
2574515
I think that would be a good idea.
Although, you can have two different character perspectives and still be able to maintain a moderate word count for each chapter (if you pace it right).
The only example I own for different character perspectives per chapter is Blowing Through the Pages, but I've yet to get to the second character. However, if you take a look at the top of one of my chapters in it, you can see that I've labeled which character's POV the chapter is going to mainly have.
If you're doing a lot of characters, it's a good idea to start with that.
I just realized something I missed when I read the last chapter ,chaos magic can do just about anything the user wants but what they make is shaped by there understanding of it, the more they know about it the more they can do with it. when she attacked Celestia she did not fully understand physical pain and etc so its sort of like making it a sword metaphorical Lego's, and Celestia just gave her a ridiculous amount of knowledge on the subject and has the personal experience of the pain amputating her own hand. (something I don't think even discord understands). Rough translation anyone against her is up shit creek without a paddle.
Congrats Twi and Celestia, you broke Eve into the stereotype of her race turned discord.
Now get out of the way before she blows up the rest of the city too from how you princesses are all screwing it up worse and worse. Let her actual friends handle this. 
anyway great chapter, nice to see Eve get some bittersweet revenge.
Only one being can fix this.
fc03.deviantart.net/fs71/i/2010/342/d/8/setsuna_f__seiei_by_lord_naraku-d34hdgj.png
2575136
Nope, he can fix all
images4.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20110725233440/mlp/images/c/c2/Time_Turner_id.png
2574321
Yep, and I hope this (my comments are always jokes
) but the charcter are in this way, for now. It's no a charge of OC, I hope to see a great "dramatic turn of events" 
Surprise surprise; it came back and bit Celestia in the ass.
2574100
Please change the description though...
It makes NO sense to where this story is going... I think... or maybe Trixie will save her...
Go Eve! =D
2577610
Yea I think I'll edit the description.
2574600
Chaotic, I was wondering you think I could start basing my introductory style in a similar fashion to Blowing Through the Pages? I really want to take your advice, but I don't want to feel like a thief.
2579791
Don't worry about being a theif. I actually took this concept from the Percy Jackson books myself.
(Second series.)
By the way, what did you think of my story? It's not the best when you compare it to my other works, but I would like to know your thoughts about it.
Save canterlot? Save the castle? Stop her? Or save the bearers from that little cell she was in? Three to oppose four options. You can predict, you can plan, but a one in a million chance will always happen sooner or later.
*****Warning!****
A CLASS FOUR SHITSTORM HAS BEN DETECTED IN THE AREA!
WE ADVISE THAT ALL PERSONNEL HEAD TO THE NEAREST SHELTER AND BRACE FOR IMPACT!
2585526 No, just any Human will do, unless they're fat and stupid.... or a girl. Huehuehuehue
2579810
Sorry for the horribly late reply Chaotic! Life stinks rofl.
I loved how it was written, your writing is flawless. *Jealousy*
And it feels awesomely original, I love stories that revolve around the school/academy concept.
They give me a nostalgic feeling about certain shows like "To Aru Majutsu no Index" lol.
Tina is my favorite though, for obvious reasons rofl. I don't comment on stories much because
plenty of other people say what I already wanted to say. I'm glad I'm caught up on it now though.
But my favorite story you've written has to be.
Everything is Ruined
2585623 Touche'
Eve has given in, now Equestria shall fall into dark. EVE HAS LIVED IN THE SHADOW OF THE ALICORNS FOR LONG ENOUGH, THE TIME OF THE ALICORNS HAS COME TO AN END! In the end she will prevail, in the end there will be only chaos!
wait, doesn't Eve still only have one hand and are bleeding profously?
5187393
She stopped the bleeding by encasing the stump with crystal
...And this is how you create a tyke bomb...