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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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This is the best i've read in a long time. Please do keep it up!
Can't wait. Reallyyyyyyyyyyyyyy can't wait for the next update
That ending...
This is going to be a very awkward situation.
Awwww, goddamnit, I was supposed to write tonight, too bloody buggered after that.
Complaints (not whines) aside...
HOOOOOLLLYY FUCK, MAN!!
THAT was amazing, granted, LONG but amazing, really didn't reckon I was gonna get through in one sitting.
I could go on about this story for hours on end, it just ceases to amaze me. THIS is what I wanted, THIS was the chapter that I wanted for this fic.
Also, a little joke to end me off, Cheers, Mate and Until Next time, Hakuna Matata
I Walked up to an olympic gold medalist in 100m freestyle and asked "How'd you get so good at swimming?"
She said. "I used to be a Street-Hooker in Venice.
Well, then.
Oh, and cutie pie the murderous robot? Really?
Displacer Beast named Sassy. Hmmmm. Naaaah. Couldn't be.
Looks like Spike took a page out of the play book Lero created. Seems to be working well at the moment. Though old Rarity's feelings of mixed species relationships really hit hard.
They're in a lot of trouble. Rarity likes being the head mare, and you should approach the head mare if you want a shot at the stallion. They both went behind her back.
Spike isn't exactly the most virtuous guy in this but I still can't help but feel bad for him. While things seem like they're working out (or about to explode terribly) for Lero, Spike's situation is just going to get worse. I remember that scene from the very beginning where Rarity is thinking how unfortunate the interspecies relationship of Lero was. Does not help that Spike has the slow maturation rate and apparently no one is sure how much longer Spike will be physically (and by extension emotionally) immature for.
Also loving that after all of this there's probably going to be no way things are going to simply go back to normal like in canon FIM. I really can't guess how this is going to end.
And the rollercoaster continues. The spirits go up as Lero's day's get better, and as his relationships will the swapped improve. Even more so when the rest of his herd decide to join in and help him, with the same mindset as he has.
...
Then AJ happens. Then Rarity. I-. Everything was going so well. So. Well.
Darndest.
As usual, now I can't wait to see how this will play out.
I've got to wonder; The guidebooks. Did you make that up, or is it based on actual guidebooks? Because, they're really well written, and much of it sounds "deep" and understanding of the topic in question.
Reading this chapter made me think of one thing though. I might or might not have mentioned it earlier. But the dialogue and interaction between all the characters seem so... Well, realistic. You put four ponies and a human on a grassy field, making them read a guidebook. During this read, you show how they interpret the text, how they discuss amongst eachother. How they laugh, cheer and noogie eachother. All this flows so naturally, five good friends spending time together.
And speaking of dialgoue, throw in random Swedish at the spa with that, haha, I didn't see that one coming.
I saw one minor thingy (or two) in the chapter if you don't mind me pointing them out.
I don't think that "is" should be there.
Here, the marked parts are Twilight's thoughts, but they are formatted as normal narrative. I may not have noticed if this is how thoughts are usually formatted, so, uh, if this is as it should be, just diregard me, haha.
With that out of the way, great chapter as usual. And again, you have me looking forward for what in the world will turn out next. I didn't expect things to go like this when starting to read the chapter, at all. I hope Rarity will be understanding, but she might as well not.
Oh well, the next chapter will tell I guess.
M
3565823
I know. Ever have one of those days where everything was just going SO WELL...?
I enjoy writing an unpredictable story and I'm glad you enjoy reading it!
It's based on actual guidebooks. I'm an enthusiastic researcher. Incorporating facts, and knowing your subject matter lends itself well to crafting drama. Even in fantasy, you don't want to pull EVERYTHING out of thin air.
When I created Mr. 7, I spent a lot of time researching spiders.
When I had Lero talk about how he survived the Storm of the Century, I read up on the Storm of the Century.
When Rarity needed to read about bonobos, I read through many articles to make sure the book's facts were all correct.
Back in Chapter 2, when Lero needed to survive a fall from the sky with no parachute, I made sure I had a real-life example of that happening I could point to.
So you can bet when I needed Lero to teach Fluttershy comedy straight from books, I read through a few how-to-be-a-comedian books myself.
Thanks! That bit was fun for me, too! I read some of the comedy stuff in one of the how-to-be-a-comedian books, and imagined what my characters would respond to some of its information, and how they'd play out some of the exercises. The rest wrote itself!
Svenska är ett roligt languae.
You'll see! Stay tuned!
Nice long chapter with awesome stuff. Most nerve wracking end ever!
Lero & Dash:
i.imgur.com/1tzSL6W.gif
3565121
Well, the simple fact of the matter was we weren't ever going to end quite how the show was; Lero's there. Maintaining the show'a status quo is not a concern, because it wasn't there in the first place.
Oh cripes. Just when things were going well. I have no idea how they are going to square things with Rarity. It's funny, because they didn't actually do anything, yet everyone involved knows it was a breach of trust. Somehow, I don't see the excuse, "But Twilight and Lyra were cool with it!" going over very well.
You do such a great job of putting your characters in awkward positions.
3568466
It's not just that it won't end like it did in canon, because clearly the show's status quo is out the window at this point, but that the entire structure is fundamentally different. Its not a simple jaunt that is returned to what it used to be, whatever the solution happens to be. Even after the swap is fixed there's increasingly no going back to "normal". Even if somehow the swapped lose all their memories (and everyone else does) about the swap, Lero's family will still hold scars from it.
I'm not sure that Lero's quite figured that out yet.
3568565
Maybe I'll un-swap 'em. Maybe I won't.
But I can promise everyone one thing: there will be no easy-clean memory wipes at the end.
And to think. All of this drama probably could have been avoided if he had just come back home and said. Ladies. I think Rainbow Dash has a think for me. Lyra and Twilight would have done the nod to each other and odds are Rarity wouldn't feel betrayed. Things could have been great! Why can't thinks be GREAT! Oh that's right drama.
3568726
No un-swap? But then! . . . Rainbow AND Rarity! . . . and Lero? . . . the herd?! . . . and Twilight will forever be! . . . and DISCORD? . . . and, and all the families . . . and . . . wow.
(Mind blown)
I'm trying to remember the rules for mares wanting to join a herd. On the one hoof, they both had tact consent from both Twilight and Lyra. On the other hoof, Rarity is (or at least remembers being) Lero's first marefriend, and probably considers herself head mare. And with the best will in the world, a one to four male to female ratio may simply not work in the same way a one to three ratio will. Especially during that time of year.
Either Rarity is going to be exasperated with the pair of them for breaking protocol, or severely annoyed with both of them for putting her in a very difficult decision. Or possibly both.
3568726
"Are you sure there isn't an easier, cleaner way to do this?" Lero asked. "A spell, maybe?"
"Don't be silly, Lero," Twilight said. "Magic can restore memories, but it never works to erase them. And you can be much more precise with that icepick than I could with my horn."
"Glaryrrghhhhghhhlbl," said Rarity.
3563545
What else would an Equestrian death robot be named, really?
3568726
Yay! I hate reset-button endings almost as much as blatant "shoot the shaggy dog" endings.
At the risk of sounding like a petulant, impatient child: princesses soon? Because this List is starting to become rather unwieldy. *contemplates using it on Tia as the world's biggest rolled-up newspaper. "Bad princess!" thwap*
(I wonder if you're going somewhere with Lero's dream about Tia. I'm frankly shocked that nobody has come out and wondered "what the hell?" aloud yet. Too busy dealing with the trees to worry about who planted the forest, I assume.)
3569143
*thwap* The ponies are suffering enough without lobotomies for comedy's sake.
3569218
At the risk of sounding like a petulant, impatient child: princesses soon?
Alright, alright, I'll come right out and say it:
You will all be seeing Princess Luna make her grand debut in Divided Rainbow at Chapter 25. Celestia will be there too. I've been keeping her in reserve for a rather momentous bit of drama.
(I wonder if you're going somewhere with Lero's dream about Tia. I'm frankly shocked that nobody has come out and wondered "what the hell?" aloud yet.
You shall see...
You know, it hit me after a recent rewatch of Magical Mystery Cure that Lero could be doing more to hinder a cure than helping. Don't get me wrong, not wanting to just sit back and let the swapped be miserable is great...but then the rewatch reminded me of just what Twilight's method of fixing things was: She basically did what Lero's doing...except that she played on the bonds of friendship to get the appropriate swapped to help another in the role they were originally in (or to put it simply, she got Fluttershy to help Dash with the animals, Dash to help Rarity with weather, etc etc until finally getting Pinkie to help Ponyville in general).
By allowing the Swapped to NOT be totally miserable in their new professions,/roles, it means that this solution likely won't work in this story, or at least, it won't be as simple as it was presented in show.
3570239
An interesting observation, indeed! Believe me, it'll be worth seeing what happens when Lero's finished with all his equilibrium work!
3570638
Lero becomes an alicorn princess (not a typo) instead of Twilight!
...Wait no, no...there's already another story that did that.
3570665
Lero becoming an Alicorn princess? Alright, I'll spoil this: no. That's not gonna happen. Not even an Alicorn prince.
Just you all wait and see what DOES!!!
I can't believe how much I love this story!
Finally caught up with it, can't wait to see where it goes!
Hm...Good chapter as always. I wonder how it all is going to end. I doubt it's going to end with Twi or anyone becoming princess/prince. Twi simply more likely as far don't deserve it, most of the work was done so far by Lero anyway. He's doing well trying to get Swapped not to kill each other before cure is found.
I'm only worried that in the end it may looks like Fluttershy is going to end with massive crush on Lero(thanks to his relations with swapped RD now), not to mention Rarity and her reaction to all this...in the end and now, as end of the chapter showed us.
Oh dear...
Here we see the most important aspect of the Swapped: They are, to some degree, both involved ponies. How this will play out remains to be seen, though I suspect Rarity will just be a bit peeved that Lero didn't raise the possibility of herd expansion with her after the first date, much less the second. Really, by the time you're petting displacer beasts together, you should know it's serious.
On a lighter note:
One confused bionic raises a hoof.
BIONIC A
Um, ma'am? Doesn't meat burn?
QT-3.14 atomizes BIONIC A
QT-3.14
Any other smart-flanked comments?
In any case, I look forward to more.
didn't i already fav this story ? whatever faved !
Edit: aahh.. thats was the follow that i already did.
Edit2: the link for "The Adventures Of Milo And Otis" don't work for me.
try this one instead http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Kz_LSe6_E7Y
Ouch...
But I do not get it, Lyra and Twilight are in Leo's heard so why is Rainbow hanging out with him a bad thing?
3581141
Because no one told Rarity.
3570665 can we get some fan art of this, please? It would be deliciously zany.
OH GOSH that ending! I canNOT wait to see that.
I pray inspiration hits you with a bag of bricks and you post the next chapter in record time.
A masseuse is always female. The masculine form is 'masseur.'
3609959
Oops! Thanks for pointing that out! Darn spell checker!
3566453 Svenska är ett roligt språk* förutom det så är det helt perfekt (except for that it's totally perfect)
I was wondering when Rarity would show back up.
I'm guessing this was the point Lero learned how to crush coal into diamonds with his sphincter.