Chapter One: A WHAT?!
Shining Armour ran towards his home, the Crystal Palace. The guards bowed to him as he galloped into the main hall, quickly looking for a quill and parchment. He spun around, running between different rooms searching for the equipment when he heard muffled hooves coming down the hall.
"Shining? Is that you?" Cadence called out. She could hear frantic pacing and drawers being opened and slammed as somepony raced around her room.
She entered to find her husband running backwards and forwards, searching for something. He was so distracted he didn't even notice her walk in.
"Shining what's wro-?" she started but was quickly stopped as Shining started to blab away.
"Have you seen a quill and parchment? I need to talk to Twiley now." he said looking around more frantic than before.
Cadence lifted an un-used scroll and quill from her saddle bags.
"Here, I have some." she offered looking at him worriedly. "Shining... honey, what's the problem?"
Cadence walked over to a chair sitting down and pulling a book out. Shining quickly started to scratch away like his life depended on it.
"A... um..." he started puffing. "Changeling... was seen... scouring the edges... of the... Crystal Empire... we're not sure...
where... it went though... and done." he said, rolling it up. Shining quickly rolled up the letter to Twilight and used a spell Celestia taught him to send letters straight to a recipient.
Cadence gasped. "But... how? And what does Twilight have to do with this?"
"We could need the help of the Elements of Harmony. So I've asked for her help." he lied, coolly packing a bag. He spun around to kiss his wife. "I'll be back soon. I swear. Let me just deal with this, okay?"
Cadence hugged him tightly. "Be safe. Please. And say hello to Twilight and her friends for me."
"Always." he whispered before sprinting from the room. Cadence walked to her balcony slowly hoping to glimpse her husband.
She could see him running towards the area of the gates before disappearing over the horizon. Cadence placed a hoof of her small bump.
"I was going to tell him about you today. But I guess fate had other ideas..."
Twilight jumped at Spike's sudden burst of flames. She had been reading a book on mind spells when the letter arrived.
"Twilight! There's a letter here for you. And... um, I don't think it's from the princess." Spike called down at her from his cosy bed, sounding mildly confused. Twilight stood up, stretching, before slowly walking up the stairs taking her time.
Not many ponies knew that spell. Celestia created it and never published it, so it would be from somepony important. Her mind ran through different scenarios as she finally reached her bedroom. Twilight levitated the scroll.
The paper was crushed and had ink spills all over it. Definitely not from the princess. “I wonder who it’s from?” she questioned as she looked down at Spike.
“Beats me. I’m going back to bed.” he growled, hiding away his head underneath the covers. Twilight chuckled at the baby dragon’s love of sleep and flattened her letter against her bed, laying down to read it.
Twiley,
You have to help me. Today, a changeling was found on the outskirts of the Crystal Empire. But it left a filly changeling. A note was left on the foal to me from Chrysalis claiming the foal was mine and her’s. Please help me, I can’t face Cadence alone.
-Shining Armour
Twilight stared blankly at the piece of parchment in front of her. Re-reading the letter, she brushed it off as some cruel joke her brother was playing, but decided to play along for his sake. She quickly wrote a note saying she would help him and sent it quickly.
And yet, little did she know he would be on her doorstep the next day.
Shining banged on the library door loudly. He jumped on the spot nervously- holding the basket containing it, in his mouth. A familiar scaly face appeared at the door.
“Shining? What… what are you doing here?” Spike asked, scratching his back. Shining quickly ran inside shutting the door behind him.
“Spike, what is all that rack- Shining!” Twilight squealed, bolting down the stairs and trapping her brother in a huge hug.
Shining used his magic to seal all the curtains and soundproof the walls.
“Twilight, I need your help with… you know... the foal.” he said seriously, pointing to the basket he had set down in the corner.
Twilight looked at him before moving to the basket to peek inside.
She gasped and skidded away putting as much distant as she could between her and the… thing.
“How… how could this be?!” she shrieked frantically.
He lifted the blankets off revealing the foal.
“I’m not sure. That’s why I came to you.” Shining said levitating the gurgling white foal in the air. Twilight could see the similarities to both Shining Armour and the Changeling Queen. But how was it possible? Did changelings even have offspring if they weren’t capable of love?
Shining paced nervously. “I couldn’t face Cadence, Twiley. It'd break her heart just to see the foal, let alone live with it.”
A sleepy Spike spoke up from his rug. “Just send it back…”
“Send it back... SEND IT BACK!?” Shining screamed at the young dragon. “I CAN’T JUST SEND IT BACK! IF I COULD DO, YOU THINK I WOULD BE HERE, SPIKE?!” A final burst of rage made his mane catch ablaze with red flames.
“Shining! Calm down!” Twilight yelled, backing away from the heat and at his younger sister's request, Shining calmed down
quickly- panting from the exhaustion.
“What… what was that?” he asked and Twilight gave a nonchalant shrug.
“It was a magic rage. You get used to them.” she said simply. “Now onto the problem at hoof.” She walked over to the filly.
“Hmm… She definitely has your coat and her wings and horn. But how is what I want to know."
Shining looked at his ‘daughter’. “I don’t know. But I need your help to figure out how to keep her safe. I know I shouldn't but... I care for her. Even if, you know, she is half changeling."
“Okay. So what do you need my help for?”
"I need you to help me hide her true origins until I have the right way to tell Cadence, please. Do you have a spell to cast on her to hide her horn and wings? "
Twilight sighed looking softly at the filly. “I think I do. But you still have to tell Cadence sometime." she said, poking him in the chest. "You can't hide behind an enchantment forever. Espically when she starts to grow up, but the spell will take some time to get ready."
Shining facehooved. "Do you think she could stay here with you? Just for a while until the spell's ready and I have the right way to tell Cadence?"
Twilight looked into her brother's pleading eyes, only before letting out an exsaperated sigh.
"Fine." she muttered. After all, she did have Spike, so how hard could a foal really be?
Shining sighed in relief. “Thanks Twiley. Now I got to go. Cadence will be worried. Love you and I promise I’ll be back soon!” he said running out the door.
“But-“ Twilight didn’t end the sentence realizing it was too late. She sighed once again, only before turning to the foal and giving a small smile.
I wonder if you have a name. she thought, glancing down at the filly.
"Well, I think I’ll call you…" the Element of Magic paused for a moment, placing a hoof on her chin to think. "Allia. That’s a nice name, right?” Twilight smiled at little Allia, levitating her and nuzzling her softly. The foal yawned loudly, which urged Twilight to place her in the warm blankets of her bed to sleep.
“Goodnight Allia.”
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I WAS WAITING FOR SOMEONE TO WRITE A STORY ABOUT THIS
Epilogue is after the story the Prologue is before it.
I thought it was some of those stories that begin with the ending, but no
2441741 is right, it should be Prologue.
2441778
Why not Normal, they came first. Heh.
I was wondering how long it would take for someone to write a story based on that image only a day after seeing it on My Little Brony
This story is promising so I will keep an eye on it.
Fine, I'll say it if no one else will. This is a rip-off of PonyBlue's "The Foal in the Basket". Warranted, this is a comedic take on the idea with major differences, but still very similar in the premise. That being said, because PonyBlue is one of those insipid writers who apparently don't understand the value of finishing what they start, it's perfectly okay for you to do your own take on the idea as long as you plan on carrying this to completion.
Interesting. I'll keep my eye on this one.
2441829pony blue updated recently
So if u want a story updated regularly write it yourself or stop grieving
2441748 no offense but pony blue did write this idea either 1st or was one of the first. However this is a much more comedic take on the concept
2441829
As far as you know the writer just had the same idea, it's happened before. But if it is a ripoff the writer needs to point that out and give credit where credit is due... Then I again he could have just come up with it himself. Personally, I don't really care either way, I'm still reading this
2441748
There already is one, but it's heavy drama. The Foal in the Basket.
This one should be fun, but the author could use some technical assistance.
2441829
Actually I think this was inspired by the cover pic which came out on DA recently. The pic and story actually share the same title. Unless it was a comission. It's not an obscure concept.
That said TFitB has a lot of shit like herd social structure and other "Xenophilia" popularized themes stinking up an otherwise solid tale, so having one free of that crap is nice. As long as the author can pull it off.
...oh I know what happened..hehehe
2441950
In that case tomatoes are now carrots.
2441748 good I wasn't the only one I found the pic on my little brony this person titled it the same as it was on MLB
Not bat but although you're focusing on Comedy you need to slow down. You could also do with a quick check for spelling errors.
Nice fic, I had a similar idea for a fic based off of that image... that's embarrassing
, like showing up to an event wearing the same outfit. I guess, I'm gonna need a different title now.
Shining is a douche
My first thought was 'Foal in the Basket'. Which was also the first thought I had when I saw the art this story is using as a cover.
Not that it is a bad thing. Lots of stories have the same idea, generated completely independent of each other. I just hope this story updates quicker than TFitB. Will add this to my list of followed/favourited stories on concept alone, as it is a story hook I rather enjoy. 
Good story so far I say. You should slow down a bit and add a little more to each chapter and double cheek your spelling.
Don't worry, your story is still good. I know how I felt with my first story.
2441902 Sorry I actually didn't know...
I just saw the pick on My Little Brony and this idea popped into my head.
2441772>>2441778 and everyone else who has made a comment on the prolouge/epilouge thing, I am truly sorry but I don't have the best of schools and I was never really taught this. I just learn from how other authors write.
But to everyone who said they liked this, Thanks!
2442294
This story may have a similar premise to pony blue's story but is is unique in its style.
I encourage you to read it for inspiration and guidance. And to avoid the running joke in blues story
I.e. something with rarity and the parentage of the foal.
This story is both hilarious and sad in a way that makes this tale so funny.
No matter what he does Shining Armor is in BIG trouble either way and he's brining Twilight along for the ride.
Please do keep up the good work.
MOAR!
i know you just updated this but i don't care
Shining really makes me mad...kinda reminds me of the dad in Replacing Scootaloo but...jerkier..
http://fc01.deviantart.net/fs71/f/2012/236/2/1/i_am_your_father___by_mayanecristinaa-d5c9a2b.png That is how anthro Shining would feel right now.
I won't lie, this is a great story so far, but the errors you have are a bit glaring. You definitely need an editor and since I'm ecstatic about the idea of this, I wouldn't mind helping you, y'know. Ah, no matter.
I shall simply fave and wait for more!
Very well written, I can't wait for the next chapter ^^
An interesting concept, albeit done before, but I do have some issues.
One of my problems here is the way Shining Armor is being portrayed in such an overly stereotypical depiction of a deadbeat doesn't-want-anything-to-do-with-child and knows-nothing-of-responsibility dad. Now I know there are unfortunately men like that, but Shining Armor simply is not like that, nor are the majority of men, believe it or not. It gets so infuriating that all the men in this story, SA and Spike namely, are shown to be selfish, careless and/or idiots when it comes to raising children who they think they can be sent away like unwanted gifts whilst the women, namely Twilight here, are the maternal, caring figures who give the child its name. I can appreciate Shining Armor is extremely stressed and confused right now and is in an incredibly award position, but his true, canon character is far more selfless, noble-hearted and caring of others and no way near as sharp and bellicose than as he's being portrayed here. Him having a little dash of empathy for the foal and being a little less selfish would be well appreciated.
And also, whilst I do look like a comedy, this is a pretty sensitive and mature situation that happens to people in real life all the time and whilst playing it as a comedy CAN work, it all comes down to execution and I'm a bit worried how that execution is, well, being executed, for lack of a better word.
It's not a bad story, but I do think it needs a little work.
Jesus christ if I were you my head would've fucking exploded by now. You've seen all the fics recently, right? All the X is secretly/ becomes a changeling, changeling makes friends and gains acceptance in ponyville/ human in equestria/ terrible alicorn OC/ fo: e fics? In essence all those have very similar if not identical premises in their associated storylines/ genres..
Join me, my friend, and we can complain together about authors not writing something different for a change.
To read later
I'll assume the "Epilogue" refers to the ending result of the Changling Invasion 'Arc' of the show, in turn being the Prologue to the story
i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/036/089/hnnng.jpg
While this story is interesting: 1. 2442768 I agree. I dislike how Shining Armors character feels like a stereotypical and unrealistic male deadbeat. Spike too seems rather cardboard cutout bad male stereotype.
2. This story has yet to show why it's an everyone rated comedy. So far it's dealt with Shining who seems to hate and neglect his child merely for its existence. This story kind of looks like it's dealing with some slightly more adult themes from here. I don't mean to patronize. Merely stating that perhaps there are some changes in the story tags that need to be made.
glad to see someone finally made a use for that picture after all
Man Shiney needs an intercontinental ballistic ass wuppin for that kind of behavior!
2442294 It's not big deal, I actually faved and thum up-ed
It was just one of those mistakes that keeps bugging you. 
Lol. Shining Armor had is first magic rage.
Hmmm... the characters are a bit funky, the pacing is a bit rushed, and the dialog so far hasn't been that engaging. There are also a few hiccups with grammar and formatting (The second letter wasn't in italics even though the first one was), but the concept is interesting and I like how you're making this a comedy. Try to pick up your game a bit in the later chapters while avoiding the pitfalls of using memes and fourth wall jokes (which you've thankfully haven't used yet... a wonderful sign!) and this could turn out to be quite the fun read
Good luck to ya
What a terrible father.
There are many instances in which there was no love required in producing offspring.
It's called rape.
2444688
Yeah. You might wanna nuke or at least rethink that line.
On another note I like this.
I hope you can work Momma Twi Well.
On a side note. It has been officially stated that Celestia raised Spike. Just sayin.
Oh. And you're welcome for the 100th like.
I Look forward to the next chapter.
2442498 I would love to have you as an editor!!
You know if that's alright with you...
2442768 I'm sorry you have found my story to be this way. I didn't intend to offend anyone but this is is my first story and it sorta was a flash idea. I am going to go back and edit ALL my chapters to make sure they're up to my usual standard.
Thank-you for bringing this to my attention though. I'll be sure to make sure that I don't offend anyone next time.
2443359 Hahaha. Sure let's go with that.
i think it remind me "foal in basket".......
2444977 Message me anytime!
2444987 I appreciate that, I do. YOu don't come across as someone who's trying to offend anyone. It's just that you need to be careful when you make a comedy on a subject matter such as this.
And yeah, it's just Shining Armor feels too OOC for me here. He's far too selfish and bitter here to feel like he's the real character.
What I would kindly suggest is perhaps starting the story from Scratch. The plot seems to have jumped too quickly and characters like Shining Armor (and to a lesser extent Spike) have been damaged by their immediate portrayals. The story seems really popular already and so I don't think restarting it would cause any damage to that, especially if it's on the grounds that you're trying to make it better. But hey it's all up to you.
Ps. Regarding the Changelings, I personally think the Hive idea is a bit out of date considering the comics and the fact here that they are shown to be able to mate outside their species and that technically speaking, the workers of a hive are all female. I'd recommend going with a Changeling homeland idea, but hey, again, it's all up to you.
2445403 Thanks I LOVE to hear good and strong constructive criticism. So thank you a ton. I have also gone back and edited the last chapter to make SA more likeable, but I like Spike and he's a baby so he truly wouldn't understand the concept of everything about the foal.
Also with the changeling hive, I am new to the whole wide world of Equestria and MLP: FiM so I haven't had time to go through all the art no matter how much I want to. But thanks for the help.
Oh sweet Jesus another Australian! I'm not alone in this barren wasteland of pony!
2445586 Hell yeah dude!!
2445224 you beat me to it you speedy bastard.