• Member Since 8th Apr, 2013
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Sharp Spark


Nothing says I miss you quite like war poetry carved in your door with a stanley knife.

T
Source

When I discovered the harp markings on my hip, it was just the lowest point in a day that was already at rock-bottom. How was I to know that they would be the first of many changes? Changes that were inexplicable and shocking in scope... and that threatened to strip my of not only my humanity, but my very identity.

This story is inspired by Five Score, Divided by Four, by TwistedSpectrum.

With much editing and assistance from the talented Exuno.

Chapters (6)
Comments ( 158 )

It was then I noticed a flash of color at the edge of my vision, something on my thigh, way high up, almost to my hips and butt, but on the side. Wait. On both sides.

There was... some sort of gold harp. Yep. Definitely a harp, with three strings. And not tiny... pretty damn large.

I had some sort of tattoo.

...

What.

The.

Fuck.

This would express him perfectly, I guess.

...must get back to writing chapter 11 of my fic.
...but must continue reading this one!
I don't know what to do! :raritycry:

But seriously, awesome, awesome work so far. You deserve many views :twilightsmile:

I love this story!!:pinkiehappy::pinkiehappy: PLEASE CONTINUE!!! it would ean so much to me!! its just SOO interesting that i must know more!!!!!:ajbemused:

Hmmmm... a bit of a slow start before it really kicks in, then the middle was spot on, then the end felt a bit rushed... but overall I enjoyed what I read! I haven't read the story this was inspired by yet, so I don't know about its overall quality, but that doesn't change the fact that what I read was entertaining. Keep it up :twilightsmile:

I've said it before and I'll say it again, Daisy is the best. And, if you think about it, really the one affected worst by this whole 'turning into ponies' thing. I think she and pastry-girl could have been really happy together, but these things happen, I suppose. Though really, I guess the only thing standing in their way is crippling physical and psychological trauma, and the hands of destiny itself, and since when have those ever been able to stand in the way of a good love story?

“Let’s see, well, first you sort of started a drinking contest with yourself. And then Daisy took that as a challenge, and dragged me into it as well...

...Daisy acts a bit like fanon Berry Punch... :rainbowderp:

So the sound I made when I discovered this was... well, okay, I'll admit it: I kind of squee'd.

I had no idea this existed, but I was extremely excited to find this! Generally my early-morning browsing of FiMFiction turns up some pretty meh stuff, but this is really neat! To say I was excited to get home from work and actually comment on it was an understatement.

It holds special interest for me because I too am writing a story about someone turning into Lyra, although I cut out the whole physical change in the middle and focus on the mental. But this... aaah.

I'm sorry, I'm kind of geeking out about this still. But I am going to be tracking this with great interest! I'll come back and add something more constructive once I can guarantee I won't geek out over it too much.

This is awesome! Keep it up!

Halfway through writing a Lyra side-fic for five score, then I find this. Then I realise mine came after. Then I realised mine sucked. Then I realised yours was awesome. Then I realised I could write around that. Then I read this. Then I hung my head in defeat.

Well played, sir/madam:twilightblush:

2483571
Don't sell yourself short. Writing is good no matter what; that's how you get better. And the only reason that I'm so happy with a lot of this is due to a lot of input and help from my editor. Plus, there's room for plenty of crazy turning-into-ponies stories on this here Internet. I'm not laying dibs or anything, particularly if you have different interpretations of things from me - would be cool to see what your story looks like.

2482386
Interesting! I'm going to be dealing with some more of the mental-related stuff very soon. Potentially very very soon, as I'm in the last stages of revisions on the next chapter.

Gave yours a read and enjoyed it - Will be looking forward to see how you handle things going forward.

I originally read Five Score, Divided by Four and loved it.

There is one based off it, you say?

BUCK, YEAH!

Theoretically we both liked music as well, but I liked music and he liked noise.

I immediately thought of Octavia and Vinyl.

I drew in a big breath and began bouncing on my toes excitedly. And then, I kid you not, I squeed.

When I read the description of this story, I squeed too.

I think my WTF meter just exploded... :pinkiecrazy:

Great work so far!

"And then eveything went dark"

You awake to find yourself in a dark room...

8

I hope this is not as NSFW as the other one. Thanks heavens no suspicious tags.

Kinda got interested by chapter four, not really a fan of the becoming a certain pony premise but I like Lyra. I hope you have a plan to make this one interesting. :pinkiesmile:

2483949

That story is an example of terrabad with this premise in my opinion.

I... I... just was going to post a suggestion that you should collab with >>TwistedSpectrum to combine your two fics...

Then I realized this was ACTUALLY a side story in the same universe. Um.

*squee.*

The mysterious story description caught my attention. I'll check this out later.

I love how things just instantly go to shit for this guy. Will read.

Well, this story makes me very happy :pinkiehappy: If this premise turns into a collab with every story of this quality, I doubt there'd be an emoticon to cover it!

Awww sheeeeit! This is lookin' real good. Can't wait for the next chapter.

2484650 Can't blame me if I don't look at the author's userpage! D:

Ahahaha, the plot thickens!

As far as I can tell you're deviating in this mental respect from the original story--which I can respect. I didn't expect it, but I'm curious to see where you take it.

Ah, typical Lyra... Good that she's here. Yes, good that she's here. Hmhm.

... Baaaah, I can't help it, this story just makes me so thrilled!

2488305

Yeah, it's sort of ambiguous still. At least until more things happen in 5S/4 - I just went ahead and struck off on my own route cause it seemed to fit in well with where I wanted my story to go. I'm not 100% concerned with keeping perfect canon, but I'm overall trying to stick with it. A lot of the mental stuff can be very hand-wavy too, potentially explained by different personalities of the ponies, the humans, and how they clash. Lyra being excitable and just jumping into the driver's seat seems in-line with her character. (At least in my interpretation)

Anyways, there should be more depth and even more poking around at the mental aspects in the next chapter. Right now I have it almost ready. It's quite short, relatively, but it does its specific purpose very well. Just need to think through it some more and make sure it's 100% good to go and what I want.

Why the chapters sound like a part of some poem or song?

Huh... this is kinda confusing. I get the general gist of it, but maybe you should elaborate a bit and make things clearer? Also, this "voice" *coughlyracough* in Tyler's head just appeared out of nowhere in this chapter... Unless I'm really bad at analysing prose, could you tell me where you did introduce the voice properly, if you did? :)

A fairly short chapter but it came quickly so I can't really complain. Anxious to see what happens next ^.^

2491641

Discussing the reasoning behind ch4 and ch5.
Building through the events of chapter 4, Lyra begins to take more and more control, ultimately her personality and mind completely taking over, albeit incidentally rather than purposefully. Daisy and Brooke realize this at the end of the chapter, but Lyra herself does not until she is forced by Daisy to consider it directly.

At that point, Lyra realizes what she has done and freaks out about it, choosing to suppress herself as entirely as she can. Thus, chapter 5. Tyler is back, of sorts, and Lyra is no longer there in his head. But it's not as simple a matter as her just going away, as... can be seen. It's not until he finds some emotions again, brought on by Brooke crying, that he is able to realize what he is missing and fight his way out of the nothingness he is stuck in. And to do so, he realizes he needs Lyra, and tries to negotiate some sort of understanding with her.

I am trying to walk a narrow line between delicately weaving these themes in and still making it coherent enough to follow. This is a little tricky, to be honest, and I'm not sure how well I am achieving the balance, but I think I would prefer to err on the side of subtlety rather than it be too obvious.

I have no idea what the point of this chapter was

2491750

Wait so, are there like... two different people/ponies in one mind or just overwhelming old memories of his/her past life sort of like... taking over?

This certainly took a large step away from FS/4 as to how they "connected" with the ponies they were/are. Dreams vs. mental connection, hmm...

Anyways, nice story you got going on here.

2491750

I thought this chapter did a good job of conveying what you just stated you were trying to convey. After our hero's relative mania at the end of the previous chapter, the listlessness at the beginning of this one was a sharp and unexpected contrast. The hero's statement that the voice is gone and the hero's disinterest in the lyre pretty clearly show that the Lyra personality is gone. The roof top conversation reveals that (thankfully) Lyra is not completely gone, just hiding, and the line

“I don’t want you to go away. I just don’t want to go away either,”

makes it pretty clear where they stand. I thought that statement was rather poignant, actually! Props! I hope we get to see them come to an agreement and that we get to hear a bit more from Lyra, but I admit that this is an excellent hook upon which to hang a lot of story, so it probably won't be easy. (I don't think there's anything in the story so far that clearly says why Lyra left. The reader is left guessing about that, but unless Tyler had some intuition about it, I wouldn't expect to know more until Lyra starts talking again. Scratch that, on rereading, it's there.)

I suppose it's possible I found this easy to understand because it's something I already speculated about when reading FSDbF. (2463290) Your answer is the one I was rooting for, while FSDbF seems to have taken an even darker route than I had expected:

the fact that I was actually Dash meant that Rainbow Dash herself had been pretty much wiped from existence.

That's intriguing in and of itself, because that's going to make beating the antagonist pretty challenging! FSDbF is not over yet either; there's plenty of time for more details to come to light.

I enjoyed this chapter and can't wait to see what happens next. I await with great anticipation further updates to both stories!

You and I have very similar trains of thought, it seems. Watching you work this out... fascinating stuff.

I've got a long way to go before I'm at this point in my own story, but I'll be sure to keep this around for inspiration and guidance.

I was alarmed from the deviation from the "norm" at first--that is to say, 5S/4--but... this is good, I think. This is fascinating, and it's useful and inspiring for me.

2487490 Explain to me why that makes no sense please

2493450
What would your reaction be if you were suddenly being turned into a pony? I would be scared. Like, alot.

Holy crap dude...

This is heavy. I mean, finding out that you have another (soul?) within your body and having it being a part of you is some pretty massive stuff. Knowing its a different person with its own dreams, fears, ambitions... that's heavier then the planet you live on.

This pretty good, though the TF seems a bit rushed, but hey that's just my opinion but it seems that the story is now focused on what the characters are feeling rather then that. Not too fast, but not to long, its juuust right. Will keep an eye on this story, workin on my own and it wouldn't hurt to see how others do it.

2493055

Thank you! It was sort of a difficult chapter to write and it took me some time to decide on the way that I did. The whole first 2/3rds of ch 5 are definitely meant to be jarring and to stick out, but it's hard to write that way and still have it clear that it's... well, that it's bad-for-a-reason instead of just-bad. Hah. And as you mention, the hints are in there, particularly as it comes to the very end of ch 4 where it's still Lyra's perspective, but it's very easy to overlook - but it's also hard to work it in a clearer manner without y'know just having Lyra pop in and say what's happening.

One of the things I was trying throughout is to make it a little less like two perfectly normal and self-contained minds existing in one body. And I'm perhaps departing less from 5S/4 than it may at first seem (Though, honestly, I have no idea). Minds are... messy things. I don't know that I can define it exactly, but it's less that there's two separate personalities entirely - see Tyler when Lyra is suppressing herself, he's absolutely not himself without her... or how Lyra in ch4 does not recognize Andy but still knows who Daisy is, because those memories are so important to Tyler that they bleed over to become important to her. It's more that they as individuals are defined as overlapping collections of thought, behavior, memory.

Spoilers for my current thoughts, that may impact future ideas: I would go so far as to say they are at their very core the exact same person, but if you lived two lives in two entirely different worlds (...not to mention in different genders), after twenty-five years you would be a fundamentally different person in a million tiny ways. And then if you're shoved together with your other self, you can't just merge into one cohesive person with no problems. There's friction there, even if both people are trying to genuinely work through it. And this messiness is why there's not necessarily a "Tyler's voice" and a "Lyra's voice" both floating around. Of all that internal monologue throughout the story, some is probably mostly Tyler, some is probably mostly Lyra, some is in the middle. This is not to say that I have all this explicitly planned out, cause hell it certainly feels like I'm winging it as I go, but that's my underlying philosophy on the nature of the mental conflicts.

Though, fun note: for a brief period when I was grasping around for ideas to handle the conflict that would shape up to be ch5, I considered having a dream sequence where Lyra and Tyler met and talked directly. I junked it for being a little too easy, plus I think if they actually sat down in that manner, the natural inclination would be for them to solve the problem entirely, which leaves me with nowhere to go.

2493673

I fully agree - given the two-in-one scenario, this is the formulation I find most intriguing. The personality slide in chapter four (right into a brick wall) was perfect.

Awesome. I can't wait to see where you take this!

Whoo! Very interesting. I'm actually somewhat glad that this story seems to take the confusion of being not entirely yourself, and give it a good portion of the plot.
Carry on!

I kinda get the impression that Lyra's really always been there, just... dormant? like, she got shunted into one half of the her mind, and put into a sort of 'deep freeze' where she's still able to react to stimuli in a limited way, but is not conscious. and for 25 years, this was her existence: the 'emotional' part of Tyler's mind.

Uneducated armchair psychology musings follow:

Maybe the situation is that Lyra was always a 'right brain dominant' (artsy) type, maybe meaning that her analytical side functioned as her subconscious. When she got transformed, all it would then take would be for her right brain to be forced into the 'deep freeze' state, making Lyra the subconscious side, and leaving the formerly subconscious left brain holding the reins. Since it was the submissive side, it didn't really have much of a personality of its own. What little it did have would mostly have been habits learned from the right side. So then you'd have this individual who is impulsive, not because they're 'right brained' but because they've always been impulsive.

this would nicely explain why someone who was once Lyra would be spending all this time thinking and searching for answers they know they cannot find because they lack data
Also nicely explains why someone who has melodies and rhythms going through their head would need to be taught how to bring them to the real world (artsy types as talented as Lyra presumably was would be plinking out simple melodies within half an hour of picking up a new instrument, since it's more of an intuitive thing for them)
Heck, it even explains why he has melodies going through his head: Frozen Lyra is dreaming, and the melodies are leaking out...

tl;dr:
Tyler is the left brain, and Lyra is the right. Where originally, Lyra was a emotional type, who couldn't really sit still long enough to analyze something, but would occasionally have insightful thoughts that came from her subconscious left side continuing to work on the problem. Then, Lyra got her personality put into sleep mode, making the right brain the subconscious, and giving the left the time to develop a complete personality, albeit one that takes a few cues from the right side. Now, Lyra's come back to find that her subconscious has become its own person, a person who was always dependent on, well, her to figure out how it felt about things. They may manage to become a cohesive individual again, but they'll probably always be a bit unsettling to deal with, since they'll be both intuitive and analytical, at the same time.

huh. actually, it's really hard to summarize this idea.

tl;dr, take two: Lyra Heartstrings' subconscious (primarily housed in her left brain) became independently sentient while her conscious self (primarily housed in her right brain) was taking a Rip Van Winkle nap. Its name is Tyler, and it's a little confused to find that its 'subconscious' is actually another person.

I know you said it was based off of it, but is your story in the same universe as Five Score Divided by Four?

2491750 Well that certainly clears things up, but it seems a little hard to understand :twilightsheepish:

2495807 It is, if you look at TwistedSpectrum's userpage, it is indeed.

2494474
This is some really neat analysis. I hadn't considered it as a left/right brain split, but it does fit Tyler being more introspective and Lyra more driven by impulse. Now you've got the idea floating around in my head!

2495807
Yes, basically, I'm in canon with 5S/4, unless something later happens in one story or the other than requires that to break. I'm trying to stick with it as best I can, but it's one of those things that I don't want to guarantee it, given that it's still unclear where both stories are going.

(Well, I know where mine's going, but... haha)

2498161 Well, I would hope you would know where your story is going :rainbowlaugh:.

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