Interlude
First Breath After Coma
Rarity’s lungs filled with air, and it felt like the first breath she’d ever taken. The world around her was dark—all shadows and objects just beyond the horizon—but she could hear it. There were beeps and distant hoofsteps, bouncing around her head as if somepony was marching around in there. Each step rattled her skull, yet, if anything, it was calming.
A part of her wanted to stay there. Come to think of it, did she have a choice?
Not here, came a thought, a voice that rang out like hundreds at once.
Very well, she answered in a voice that seemed foreign—that didn’t seem like a voice at all.
The air was thick with sickness and death, life and health, hope and surrender, all tinged with a strong stench of disinfectant. She snorted, and nearly coughed, but her mouth refused to open enough for even that to happen. Her chest heaved a few times, bombarding her eardrums with a cacophony. From the rattling of her ribs to the squeaking of... something beneath her, her ears, head, and very core were assaulted. All at once, the pain came back. She wanted to get out. Only seconds ago this place had been the epitome of serene. What happened?
I need to get out of here.
There was no light at the end of the murky void; no voice on the edge of unconsciousness. Rarity simply opened her eyes, first a crack, then a little more. The first thing she saw, after the light quit blinding her, was large, white tiles. Ugly things. She could count the amount of holes and dents in them, and was utterly revolted to find that they numbered in the tens. What a disaster of a... wherever she was. It most certainly was not her house; her brain wouldn’t dare even have nightmares about her ceiling being this awful.
Her mouth tasted foul. She couldn’t pick out what tastes were in there—morning breath, week-old coffee, a swamp in the summer, Celestia knows what else—but she could point out that it made her want to throw up. She turned her head to the side, coughed, and retched, but nothing came out. Instead, she was stuck with dry heaves and a pounding headache. To make it worse, every muscle in her body seemed to still be deep in their beauty sleep, and she found that she lacked the strength to even right her head. Her neck was killing her, as was everything else.
What a great way to wake up.
She almost thought, it could be worse, but quickly chose against it. She knew how life worked; if she were to think such a thing, it would do everything it could to prove her wrong. Rarity groaned and clenched her eyes tight—it didn’t do as much help for her headache as she’d hoped—then groaned once more, a little louder, and opened her eyes.
Things got worse.
She shut her eyes again. Please tell me that’s not—
“Well, look who finally decided to wake up.”
Why? Why, why, whywhywhy?!
She refused to open her eyes. No, she was still dreaming. Still asleep. Still—
“C’mon, Rare. Up and at ‘em.” The laugh that rang out after... it might as well have been a knife in Rarity’s brain. She sighed. There was nowhere to run or hide. Her muscles still lay asleep, and even if they weren’t, she wouldn’t be able to get away. She was stuck. Trapped. The only way out was to simply accept.
Cursing the day, Rarity let her eyes open again. Somehow, her headache had gotten much, much worse.
Across from where she lay was Rainbow Dash, dressed in a green gown, her foreleg propped on the railing of the bed and something between a smirk and a frown stretched across her face. Rarity’s brow furrowed. Green? Rainbow Dash would never wear such a color, not unless...
She looked around the room. In hindsight, it shouldn’t have shocked her that she was in the hospital. The beeping, the smell, the way the hooves marched along the hallway outside the room, the way everything felt wrong: it was all too obvious, she had to admit.
Her gaze drifted to herself. She too was in a revolting gown, though most of it was hidden underneath equally tacky sheets. Various wires and tubes led down into left foreleg—she could only guess that her right foreleg was equally riddled. She could even feel them draped across her chest, ice cold. Not as cold as her body felt at that moment. So many wires... so many needles. They wouldn’t scar, would they? The incessant beeping of the heart monitor carried on and on, and Rarity found herself wishing Rainbow Dash would say something. Anything to drown out that infernal beeping.
As her eyes moved back to Rainbow Dash, a feeling slammed into her chest like a freight train. No, not a feeling: memories. They rushed before her eyes, bits and pieces, sights and sounds. She remembered Sweetie Belle’s magic engulfing her, remembered kissing Rainbow Dash, remembered every word spoken and glance stolen, remembered the attack, remembered everything.
Now more than ever, she really wished she had something to throw up. Dry heaves were, Rarity decided, the worst of all worst possible things. Across the room, Rainbow Dash laughed like a kid who’d just found their best friend’s baby pictures.
“Docs said you’d be a bit weird when you woke up.” She chuckled. “Didn’t expect this, though.”
“Too much... too quick...” Rarity sputtered, trying to lift a foreleg to wipe her eyes. It was a waste of effort; her legs were still dozing, as though she’d fallen asleep laying on all four of them. She was able to wriggle her left foreleg just a tad—a tiny counter clockwise rotation—but it felt like her bones and muscles had been replaced with sand. Angry at anything and everything that had been and ever would be, Rarity gritted her teeth and begged for her stomach to stop.
Eventually it did. However that did nothing to extinguish the burning ire rising in Rarity’s chest. Why couldn’t she remember what day it was? Why did hospital gowns have to be such an awful color? Why did everything feel so wrong?
“How ya feelin’, Rare?” Rarity’s eyes shot open in a glare. How do you think? she wanted to ask. But as soon as she was able to focus on Rainbow Dash, she held her tongue. There was something to the way Rainbow looked at her. A glint in her eye—a gleam of light in the corner of her irises that shook like a leaf. Rarity’s chest suddenly went weightless, and she took a deep, shaky breath.
“I’d be lying if I said ‘never better,’” she said. Her body still ached all over, and nothing felt right, but still... something about Rainbow Dash being there made it at least bearable. She sighed and rubbed her face against the pillow. It felt like rocks. “Dash? Could you be a dear and explain to me just what the...” She took a deep breath. Her face was a raging inferno, but her blood sat frozen in her veins. “What’s going on?” she finally asked, voice as shaky as her grip on reality.
Rainbow frowned and tapped her hoof on the plastic railing of her bed. “How much do you remember?”
“I...” A wave of coughs cut her reply, carrying on for what seemed to be eons. Eventually, her lungs settled, or at least settled as much as they could. Her throat was sandpaper. At that moment, she wanted a glass of water more than anything she’d ever desired in her life.
As if she could somehow read her mind, Rainbow Dash pulled out her IV and hopped out of her bed. In less than ten seconds, she was right next to Rarity’s bed, a table with a pitcher of water and a few plastic cups being pushed along by a foreleg, while her heart monitor was dragged behind her by her right wing. Before Rarity could speak a word of protest, Rainbow had already taken a seat on her bed, pouring a cupful of water and shoving it against Rarity’s lips.
“You’re weak,” she said as Rarity sputtered. “I know this sucks, but if I let you try to hold it... yeah. Which would you prefer: water up your nose or all over you?” Rarity grumbled and coughed, but said not a word. “Better?” Rainbow raised a hoof and wiped off Rarity’s chin. Like I’m some baby, Rarity thought with a frown. Still, each message sent to her forelegs was sent in vain. If anything she should be thanking Dash right now.
When I can move, I will.
“So,” Rarity said after a long moment of silence, throat still raw, “what’s going on?” She coughed a few more times, but raised a hoof when Rainbow offered her another cup of water. “Why are you here? Why does it feel like I’ve been sleeping for years?”
“Close, but no cigar.” Rainbow chuckled and ran a hoof through her mane. “Okay, so you remember how we got stuck out in... well, in the middle of nowhere, right?”
Rarity nodded. Resting her throat was probably for the best.
“And you remember those wolves?” Rainbow’s smile vanished in the blink of an eye. Rarity’s throat burned, but this time she was positive it wasn’t a cough that wanted to break out. Though her entire face was numb, she forced a nod.
“Well... they messed us up pretty good.” Rainbow looked over her shoulder, and for the first time Rarity noticed the mass of bandages holding her left wing tight against her side. “It’s fine,” she said. “Bones got messed up pretty good, but the muscles and ligaments and all those other things are all right.” She looked back at Rarity. The glint in her eyes was dull, broken; Rarity knew something was wrong. What it was... she wasn’t so sure she wanted to know.
“That’s... good to hear.” She managed a smile. Rainbow’s lips didn’t curve upwards even an inch. “Where is everypony? I would have thought they’d be eager to see us after all this?”
“Outside,” Rainbow said.
“Why ‘outside?’”
“Because... we thought it’d be best if...”
If time was moving forward at that time, Rarity couldn’t tell. As far as she was concerned, everything had frozen; even the beeping of the heart monitor no longer existed. It was just her, Rainbow Dash, and silence. Heavy, heavy silence.
“Rainbow, what—”
“What’s the last thing you remember?”
“Well...” Rarity didn’t want to say anything. This was blazing down a path she didn’t want to follow. You’re going to have to learn eventually, a voice in the back of her head whispered. She sighed, closing her eyes tight.
Their voices rang out in a din, like the choir of hell. Rarity couldn't understand the words—their voices droning on and on like a hurricane’s wind—but she could see their faces, and the expressions they wore spoke volumes. Eyes met eyes met chart met her, and so on and so forth. A nurse jabbed her with something—a quick strike. Rarity couldn’t conjure the energy to turn her head and see what it was. She guessed it was better left unseen; probably long and pointy, and would make her heart sink below the floor of her gut where it had settled just days prior. The day she had first heard...
Sweat poured down her face, her pillow was soaked. Her entire body burned. From her leg to her chest to her head, everything felt like it had beaten by a hammer then set aflame. She wondered if it was possible to die from a broken leg. It sure felt like she was knocking on Death’s door. That probably wouldn’t go down well in the history books: Rarity Belle. Bearer of the Element of Generosity. Died from a leg fracture suffered in a timber wolf attack, brought forth by a freak kissing incident with the Element of Loyalty and a magic lesson gone awry. No... that was certainly not how she wanted to be remembered.
Her gaze drifted from the doctors—their fancy jargon and countless instruments only brought her headaches—to the cause of her problems. Her throat clenched tight and her brain refused to see what was clearly there. After all, it couldn’t be. Not in a world like this. Yet there it was, staring back at her, like a knife sticking through her stomach.
The leg lay unwrapped, the casting removed to make testing easier for the doctors. Savages. She was a lady, not a lab rat they could stick and fill with whatever they got their grubby hooves on. It lay flat—or rather, as flat as it could—on the bed, sheet pulled up so it was at the ready whenever somepony felt the desire to prick it with some vaccine or simply observe. Maybe in the past, Rarity wouldn’t mind somepony paying close attention to her leg, but not now. Not like this. There was nothing beautiful about it now. Not like this.
Not a day after she’d reached the hospital—less than twenty-four hours after she'd been wheeled into surgery and her twisted leg had been straightened out by a coat of plaster—the problems had truly begun. Her leg felt like it was on fire, and for three days she lay in the hospital bed, unable to sleep or even think. On the fourth day, they’d removed the cast, and the pain, somehow, got worse. Now her leg was bloated and black, green lines running up it like someone had taken a marker and doodled all over her veins. The lines went up her calf, past her knee, and halfway up her thigh. She swore that, if she turned her neck at just the right angle, she could even see one of the diamonds on her flank turning the faintest, sickest shade of green.
Rarity was about as far from a medical professional as a pony could get, but something told her this went beyond a simple break.
She hadn’t received many visitors, the doctors insisting that she be kept in a... they may have said “sterile” environment, but Rarity hadn’t been all there since she’d been admitted to the hospital. Out of all her friends, only Twilight Sparkle had been allowed to see her—probably the whole ‘princess’ thing—and even then she was mainly messing around with her leg like all the doctors. At least Twilight was much more pleasant company than them—smiling and even talking a bit. Princess Celestia and Luna had also swung by, but said not a word. They too only looked at her leg, shook their heads, whispered some words Rarity couldn’t hear completely to the doctors, and then went on their way.
One of the doctors—a unicorn stallion with a pale coat and neatly-trimmed brown beard—approached her and said... something. She couldn’t hear what. Even the look on his face was unreadable. He arched an eyebrow, and Rarity suddenly realized she’d been asked a question. Ears still ringing and mind adrift on a stormy sea, she nodded, slowly and gracelessly. There was a long pause before the stallion nodded, then turned to his comrades and nodded once more. A nurse strode forward, and pulled out her IV drip, replacing it with something else. Almost immediately, the world started to spin around Rarity, as if she were on a carousel that had been possessed by a madmare. Lights pulsed and dimmed, the ringing in her ears was replaced with a dull sound not unlike waves crashing along a shore, and her mind slipped off into the ether.
“... And then—”
“You woke up. Just now,” Rainbow jumped in, pulling Rarity from her memory. It felt more like being pulled into icy waters. Rarity couldn’t even force a nod. She needed to see. Needed to know. She knew she wouldn’t like it. That much was obvious. But still, she had to...
Frigid blood rushed through her body, and her hoof lifted off the bed, moving over to the sheets. Her head thundered, and there was only her, her hoof, and the unavoidable truth. Somewhere in the hazy corner of her vision, Dash spoke. “Rarity, pl...” was all she could make out.
It happened in slow motion. She hooked the sheets on her forehoof, and threw them back. A cyan leg thrust itself into her tunnel-vision, reaching for blankets, trying to hide the truth. However, it was too slow, and the sheets fell off to the side. As Rarity stared at her exposed body, she wished Rainbow had grabbed the sheets. Had hidden the truth, even if only for a minute more.
She could have found positives in how clean her coat was given the situation, or how they’d kept her tail in just the right position to avoid tangles. But at that moment, and forever after, there was only one thing.
The short nub where her right hind leg was supposed to be.
She couldn’t breathe, couldn’t feel, couldn’t think. All she could do was stare, and even that was mostly blurry. The world had just ended before her. She was dead. She had to be. Just a damned spirit. This couldn’t possibly be anything more than a dream—a nightmare.
Could it?
“Rainbow...” The words came out as a squeak.
“I’m so sorry, Rare.”
“What... what... h-hap... why... what...” Speaking seemed so utterly pointless. Everything did.
“Nopony knows,” Rainbow answered softly. “Not the doctors, or Twilight, or even the princesses.”
“But... I just... was just a...”
“It wasn’t the break, Rares.” Under normal circumstance, Rarity would have questioned how Rainbow Dash seemed to be able to read her thoughts, but this was anything but normal; the question didn’t even cross her mind. There was only her and it. “Look, I don’t know exactly what... they just said it was... Rarity, I’m sorry.”
This can’t be... I just... it wasn’t that bad. Not that bad at all. What... no, this can’t... I... this has got to be a...
Her thoughts were cut off by a weight pressing against her, wrapping around her torso. Though she couldn’t move her eyes from the stump, blue feathers suddenly blotted it out. The ability to feel rushed back into her like a cannonball, and she began to sob into Rainbow’s outstretched wing.
“Why?” She wept. Rainbow’s wing only tightened.
“It was the only way... you would’ve died if they hadn—”
“Well then, why couldn’t they have just let me die instead of becoming some three-legged freak?!”
The wing loosened. “Don’t,” Rainbow said through gritted teeth. “Don’t you dare even think that!”
At another time—as another unicorn—Rarity would have taken offence to Dash’s tone, would have argued and wept and begged for death more. But something in the way Rainbow said what she’d said made Rarity stop. For a single second, the cries ceased, as did everything else. Only Rainbow Dash moved, and she used that gift to lean down in front of Rarity’s face and give a faint smile that warmed Rarity to her very core. In the corners of her ruby eyes were tears—not much unlike Rarity’s own.
“We’ll get through this, Rare. I promise.”
And though she buried her face back into Rainbow's wing, though the sobs rose in her chest once more, Rarity believed her.
obviously injures are sad, but is the story sad? like does the injury cease any happy ending or resolution for the pair? i don't like sad stories, but i'm ok with sad moments. basically i wanna know if i should read this.
EDIT: I'm not generalizing that the story will be sad or bad. i'm sure it is good, and i am basically asking if the entire story overall is sad or just has sad moments, because i don't know myself, only razedrainbow knows this answer.
Well then. I certainly wasn't expecting that.
*sigh*
I liked "Third Time's the Charm", but I'm afraid I can't read this fo the sole reason of the sad tag :/ That and I don't like when ponies are killed or crippled...
Aaaaand... Featured! That was fast. If this is anything like TTAC, it'll deserve the kudos. Read-through starts tonight!
2537058 The story most likely will be sad. But this doesn't speak of its ending (since, like you said, the ending is just a part of the story). I guess you're going to have to buckle up and find out.
Well i'm glad this chapter cleared some things up now, I was wondering how bad rarity's injuries were from the first story, though didn't quite expect leg loss, or that nopony knows why the leg needed to be removed. o.O Guess from the sounds of it one of her gems on her flank also died or something. This also explains alot about Sweetie Belle's attitude, I figured she was pretty upset about injuring Rarity like that, maybe for causing a few scars, but to cause her sister to lose her entire leg? Yeah, that's gonna make a pshychologist somewhere rich. Could be sadder, you could have had RD lose a wing as well. ^-^;;
A good sequel so far, hope things get better as the story goes along.
2537383
Well, the doctors know why, but that won't come up 'til the second interlude.
2537395 Well if I learned anything from "Star Wars", it's probably because the leg lost the 'will' to live.
2537402
You're tempting me.
A sequal!?
Wow, that's a lot of stupid-ass butthurt in the comments. Wow.
Gotta stop reading those.
Yeah I admit i'm a little put off by the sad tag and amputation but I think im gonna keep reading.
2538160
Nice catch frickin typos
Just scrolled through comments and saw another person simply saying that he/she can't read more because of crippled/maimed ponies and general sadness. That comment, like pretty much all of them, was downvoted...
...okay people. What is wrong with you? So some of the readers voice their disagreement about the path the author decided to walk on. So? Is this really a reason to downvote? Would you rather see them simply downvoting the story and disappearing without a trace or explanation?
As far as I know, there is no law that states "Thou shall like every story!". They can dislike it and they can voice their opinion. You on the other hand have no right to downvote them for that. It's no better than downvoting your comment in which you praise the story and the author. As long as it's not offensive or downright stupid, there is no reason. And disagreement is neither of those. Downvoting because I disagree with that comment is simply... sick doesn't even begin to describe it.
They are actually right if you ask me. Compared to the prequel this story is positively dark. I would even go as to say it warrants a dark tag, even if it might be pushing it a bit.
Mainly because of the oppressive atmosphere that is created here. Because of all that self depreciation, all those jabs in inner monologues, the general hopelessness. This here is not sad for me. That's closer to a tragedy right now. I assume things will be better in time, sure. But at some point I also asked myself: Is this really a fic I want to read?
I still don't have the answer. On one hand, I enjoyed TTTC greatly and its sequel deserves to be read just because of that.
On another, the premise here would normally make me leave and never come back, as I rarely read any story capable of spoiling my mood. I figure life is tough enough without reading/watching about others having troubles and sadness themselves.
Looking back at this comment, I seem a bit aggressive. Yes, I suppose I am. But one thing that hits my very core, are people denying others their right to express their mind and state their concerns. I fight with it as much as I can and I tend to be defensive about it. Call it a quirk of mine.
My apologies to anyone who might have been offended by this very post. Feel free to disagree, it is your right to do so. Do remember, however that others also have this right. Don't think only about yourself.
As for you, RazedRainbow... as I said, I will read more of your fic and I hope you will not stray from your path because of those who do not agree with you. I don't want anything less than the author who changes their story because of reader's pressure.
I will be around this story and I will read it. Even if I have to force myself, you deserve to be heard.
Keep up your work!
And now I should go to sleep before I make an even bigger ass of myself...
Night, Y'all!
2537385 I think I read it as more just like panic mode and Shy doing a typical Fluttersh-avoids-confronting-things-head on
Just gonna say
I like this one better than Charm. And you know I liked Charm a lot.
Keep going, man.
2538178 See, tragedy? I'm not sure about that. Tragedy implies hopelessness, and I'm not sure I get that here from the words on the page. It would also imply insurmountability, which I also don't get from the words on the page. To lose is not to lose forever. The world moves on. (Though I have to say that I agree with you on being a bit more reasonable.)
2537164 I assure you that if you do that you will be missing out.
2537110 Heh. Really? I thought someone would get it by the second chapter.
2537058 Yes! To be honest, most of the stories in the world that we've committed to paper are sad. The Lord of the Rings is super depressing. But that doesn't imply a bad ending!
2538081 Trust me, this thing... I loved Charm, I kept telling Raze that charm was good and I believed in it, and this story? This story is better. It's deeper. I fell in love with it.
2537368 well actually, no i don't. the author can just tell me if he/she thinks i would like the story. i wouldn't have asked if i was willing to risk it. there are others fics for me to read that i know i will like, so just to be safe, i'm not reading this until the author gives his/her input. not to be mean, i'm sure it is written well. i am following razedrainbow for a reason after all. i just hope razedrainbow doesn't mind giving some input on if i should read this or not.
2538370 He most likely won't, in the comments. Send him a PM.
But I still think he won't risk the story being spoiled like that... no offense.
2538370
I'm not one to say whether or not someone should read my stories or not. If you decide to give this a shot, great. If you choose to not read it, that's just as fine.
I started to read this hoping it would be somewhat of a happy conclusion to TTTC. I was SO wrong....
Generally I like happy and/or funny stories better but I a sad one can be great too. In fact every, in my opinion, great story I read had a bit tragedy in it but always at least a neutral ending. I just hate it when characters grow on me just to suffer and die or suffer even more... That states I hope for a happy ending. I won't give it a vote yet since it has to be finished yet but I'll keep an eye on it, since my hopes for happier parts are still up.
2538178
TIL that people are free to dislike a story and voice their opinion, but not dislike a comment and express their opinion. I sure am glad I learned about that, or I might have made a fool of myself!
2538798
Most places have Star Swirl as two words
Also, thanks for pointing out those pesky typos that always sneak through.
Sorry whenever I get depressed I pretend life's a sitcom.
Still, I thought she was paralysed from the neck down so, all things considered, it's not that bad.
So, it seems that you're catching all hell of a lot of flak for having this be a sad tale instead of something that is an upturn in emotion from their accident. And then amputation? Oh lord no, you just didn't!
Anyways, now that I've gotten a great laugh from all these people whining, going to read what you've got of the story tonight at work. I'm sure I won't be disappointed, and at the end of a sad train can be a happy ending, so no need for me to go off whining and crap. : )
2537164
Also... Is the title of this chapter an Explosions in the Sky reference?
Now comes the hard part...waiting for the next part to be released
Overall I really like this story so far and its predecessor very much. I can't wait to find out what happens next!
Wait, amputation? How did I not know this earlier? I got the feeling that she had some serious damage to her leg, maybe had much of the musculature removed, and obviously some serious nerve damage, but an amputation? Huh. Well, I assume all will be explained in time.
Loving the story so far. But you made me cry. Jerk.
I was actually hoping you would release each chapter weekly, not all four on the same day. Now it's going to feel like forever for the next chapter(s) to come out !
2538859
Glad I could help. TTAC was wonderful, and this is proving to be every bit the brilliant sequel I knew it would be. Also, I realize most sources make Star Swirl two words, but I was pointing out that you'd spelled it "Stars Swirl."
Should probably be "pulled out her IV and hopped out of her bed."
Could go either way, but I'd use a lowercase "S" after the closing quotation mark.
*Reads "Third Time's a charm"*
"Wow, that was fucking awesome! Who knew Raridash could be such an adorable, perfect ship?"
~Le few months later~
*Sees this story*
"Wow, a sequel to that awesome Raridash fic! Count me in!"
*Sees sad tag, reads sad description*
"Ooooh boy, the first one was so adorable, cute, and squee inducing that I don't know if I could read a sad sequel... that would tear me apart. I think I might just pass this one up. After all, it's not like it's canon to the original. This is probably just some 'alternate sequel ending' thingy written by some random guy who-"
*Sees that it's the same author as the original story*
"Oh ponyfeathers. I have to read this now, don't I?
My heartstrings.
I think I can feel them being tugged.
Hard."
▶PinkiePie35
Honestly I feel like the last chapter so far is the most positive. It reviled answers about the deformities, it showed rare and dash supporting each other for the right reasons, and because the whole downward spiral had not begun yet. I like the premise o this fic, I really do. Especially now that I can tell what is going on. My only comment is that keeping the reader in the dark created some serious tension and completely did away with a standard intro. In the middle of the action. But I see promise here, and I will read every word. I just hope this ends happier than background pony.
Wait... people didn't know that it was an amputation from the beginning? I suspected in chapter one, and I was convinced by chapter two. Three actually said it. Anyway, I need to see where this goes.
2538859
...
I have more.
Rainbow looked over at Rarity, who had a look on her face that made her own heart shatter?
Oh, wait, you meant made Rainbow's heart shatter, didn't you?
That should be 'along'.
I don't know whethe to follow you, or attempt to punch you over the internet...
For now, just take my fav.
2538311
I may be, but there are just some things I really can't read...
I have contradicted myself before and read a story I marked as "don't read 'cause I don't like sad tag" or something, so I may read it at some point, but it's gonna take quite some time.
2539501 Hey now I marked that one in the doc! :C
2537058 Sad story means the story itself is sad. The ending can be happy, but the story itself is downcast. Think something like the story of Frodo and Sam in the LOTR. That journey is sad, but has a happy ending.
TRAGEDY is where you have a story (happy or sad), and everything falls apart in the end. Think almost anything Shakespeare. The story exists, but then at the end, the main characters fail.
2539626
Oops, didn't even noticed that's what you pointed out Forgive me, I'm blinded by my own stupidity.
2540846
Shh, Cyne. I'm the idiot here.
2540272
I thought I fixed that first one Man, I really need to get my crap together.
2538284
You probably edited in the answer to my comment, correct? Because it never appeared in my notifications. Good think I decided to check all of the comments since my post.
Anyhow, yes, it's not tragedy. Yet. Tragedy implies losing despite all the effort not to. We as readers can only label it tragedy after it's finish. I've read stories with tragedy tag that do not warrant the tag. Simply some authors believe that death/other-suitable-horrible-fate of one of the main cast or someone of their family warrants it, when it's not true. I used the word tragedy when I really shouldn't, because it's commonly misunderstood in a way that I wanted to use to explain myself. Though apparently my lack of English language got the better of me, yet again. But I digress... as usual...
However, as I said before I have the feeling of hopelessness right now. It's because they are forcing themselves to stay sane and not break apart. They want to break apart, they don't see any hope, they see themselves as freaks and useless beings, but they endure for one another. There is no hope, just love and will to not let the other down. And that's not hope in my books.
At least that's how I see it now. Maybe future chapters will change my emotions. Time will tell.
2538813
Why yes, they can! I never said otherwise!
However, in the system that basically treats downvoted comments as unwanted and hides them away so they do not bother, it is not right to downvote them. Do note the difference between disliking and downvoting! It's important to do that!
I say so, because so far, the overwhelming majority of comments hidden by being downvoted that I see on this site, are rude/trollish/absolutely wrong and disgusting things. And I won't stay silent if not rudely voiced disagreement gets associated with them.
I wouldn't say a thing at all if the downvoted comments weren't automatically marked as unwanted and hidden.
Unfortunately, the current system boils down to this: 'I agree with this comment' and 'this comment should disappear and nobody should read it'. As such, I will be against downvoting to show disagreement. If you disagree, answer that comment and express it. Don't downvote, because the current system sees this as you taking offense to the comment and marks it as unwanted and uncivil.
This is of course my opinion and you may disagree. Feel free to express it if you do.
Though I suppose RazedRainbow would like us to continue this in private, though that's his/her decision and I do not force you to do so.
2538907
We are not whining! We are expressing our thoughts and emotions about an abrupt change in mood compared to the prequel! I've been told for years that art is created to bring out feelings in it's recipients and force them to think; and that those feelings and thoughts are the most important. Well, we are voicing those thoughts and feelings.
And you, laughing at it, are rude. It's as if we were laughing and mocking you for liking this story. That wouldn't feel good to you, correct?
Now that I think of it... You got a fave RazedRainbow, and I'm sticking with this story. Why? Look at what I just wrote. Hardly anything brings out so many words from me.
Keep up the good work!
My reactions:
A sequel to "Third Time's a Charm?" Awesome!
Wait, why's there a [Sad] tag?
*reads description* Not sure if want...
*reads comments* What? Why would you DO that? DO NOT WANT! DO NOT WANT!!
2539375
Once I get a decent buffer, I probably will be able to release chapters weekly (or every other week).
2541356
Nah, you're not the one I'm pointing at, you actually gave more than a sentence before 'moving on.' It's the folks who are going 'oh no, it's sad, goodbye!', I read the comments before I read the story, and it was a very much recurring theme that 'oh no, you went sad hard!' After having read it, I think this is more interesting than 'oh, everything is cheery and alright.' The same good writing is still present, and this is truly a more realistic turn of events after what all happened. (Besides the leg, that is a bit on the extreme sides of things). Sides, I always like seeing your remarks on any story. (including mine, I knew your name was familiar!)
Realistically, it is indeed a rather hard shift from TTAC. My only concern is that, when working with 'broken' characters, is that it's easy sometimes to fall into pits with them. Other than that, it's set the premise for a LOT of potential.
2541035 in theory, but i could write a fic about dash joining the wonderbolts and say it is tragic, when it's kinda the opposite. in general yes, you are right, but some authors use tags slightly differently and i just like to be sure first
2542803
Goodness... you are the second person in three days that said something about knowing me from my comments on different stories... gaining popularity I am... now I have to judge whether it's good or not.
Well, I personally believe it's still better than simply downvote and disappear as I have personally seen it happen on a story or two after a massive heel face turn at some point. Suddenly 20-30 new dislikes in a span of hours with a story that had five... no info, no "yuch, not for me, leaving". Not even that. It was awful, really.
So if I am to choose between "ninja downvote" and a comment "sad story, leaving" i choose the latter. Though that is somewhat silly, at least it's explaining things in some manner. Might have overreacted though. Recent days I get that "you overreacted" remark quite a bit. It seems I'm a tad more nervous these days... gotta read more ponies to counter that!
As for potential, I agree. One of the reasons I'm sticking here, even if I'm not really a fan of such brutal ways of incorporating drama. Cause it is brutal, that much is certain. And sudden. That too.
Derp, got some new updates on fav list! Better go check that!
*eyes the comments*
Wow. Lot of wussy folk out there, ain't there Razed?
Is sad really that big of a deal to people? I mean stuff like sad and dark isn't what I normally go for but that doesn't mean I wouldn't give it a try if I like the premise. I like Charm and the stories Razed puts out so I gave this story a chance and I'm happy I did. I actually feel for the characters in this story and that shows Razed knows what he's doing when he writes pony words. Don't give up Razed, I love your dramatic and comedic blog posts more then anyone I follow even if I don't tend to leave too many comments.
Wtf? I just finished a picture that looks exactly like the thumbnail.