Life to Death Heaven to Hell Harmony to Disharmony.

by EZthebeast

To Canterlot

To Canterlot

“A pony hybrid thingy? Really?” He Said.

“Our name is not ‘pony hybrid thingy’ it is Princess Luna and we will be addressed as such.” Oh shit royalty. “Watch your language!” And she can read minds. “Anyways for where thou are… thou art in dreamscape, the realm of dreams. We saw the horrible nightmare that thou was experiencing and we saved thou from it.” Said Luna.

“That wasn’t a nightmare, that was a memory.” Deadpanned Ezra getting a shocked look from Luna.

“Why would thou be submitted to such pain?” She asked.

“I got captured during a mission that’s why.” He said his voice full of shame.

“What is this mission thou speaks of and if captured still why would they do this to thou?” Even their rulers are naïve. He thought getting an angry look from Luna. “Why would they do that to thou?” Asked Princess Luna.

“They wanted information I knew about them and what they were planning, so they tried to get me to talk.” He said while remembering the pain he experienced.

“We can see thou art uncomfortable talking about this, which brings me to my next question. What art thou? We have never seen a creature such as thou.”

“I’m a human, and why you never seen my kind before is because I’m from very far away.” He answered.

“Human, a strange name for a species don’t thou think?” She asked.

“I guess it is, but I don’t choice the species I’m born as.” He answered getting a nod from Luna.

“We have one last question.”

“Shoot.” He said getting a confused look from the royal pony. “It means ask.” He added getting a oh from her.

“We know what thou has done, we know that thou has killed mercilessly and many times before. But do thou regret it, what thou has done?” He thought a moment before answering.

“No, I don’t regret killing others, it was for the greater good. If I never became a soldier my world would have ended many times before. I admit I don’t like the killing but I have to do it. Though I do have regrets if I could change one mission or choices I made.”

She nodded. “The answer I expected of thou. Correct us if we are wrong. Thou kill because it is thou’s duty, and to protect those that thou care about. Thou doesn’t like doing it but thou must. This doesn’t make doing what thou do ok, it never will. But it helps justify it. We will let thou have good dreams for the rest of the night, goodbye.” Dreamscape then faded and it could be said Ezra had the greatest dream of his life.

Ezra woke up he was in his room at Twilight’s house/library, he got up and put his armor on. Then he walked over the door and checked his motion sensor. It didn’t detect any movement the whole night. He then checked his WMC it was 5:14. Luna must know I like to get up early. He unlocked the door and walked downstairs. He helped himself to another food pill and grabbed a glass of milk. Wait are the cows here sentient? Nah. He then started doing push ups he needed something to do to exercise his muscles.

Twilight woke up suddenly. She listened and heard a small grunt. She was only half awake so this was going through her mind. SOMEPONY IS DOWNSTAIRS STEALING MY BOOKS! GOT TO PROTECT MY BABIES. She them picked up a dictionary and held it like a club. She then went downstairs and saw Ezra doing push ups.

“What are you doing?” She asked.

“Passing the time.” He answered while still doing push ups.

“It’s 5:30.” She deadpanned. He then stood up and shrugged.

“Yeah well I get up early.”

“Well it’s a good thing your up. I’m should prepare you before you meet my friends.”

“Yeah what should I know?” He asked not sounding interested.

“Well one of my friends is a bit umm…”

“Crazy?” He interrupted.

“No. Erratic and she might or might not break the laws of physics. Just don’t question it.” What? How could someone break the laws of physics. She has to be messing with me.

“Ok anything else?” He asked.

“Yes another one of my friends is maybe going to be startled by your appearance.” Duh. Who wouldn’t be?

“Ok so when are we leaving?” He asked.

“At 8:00, soon I’m going to get my friends. Also can I ask you more questions?” He sighed. Got to think of an excuse quickly. … that will work. He then activated his cloak. Genius. Twilight’s eyes widen. “Youcanturninvisiblethatsamazing! Wait, did you do that just so you didn’t have to answer my questions?” He stayed silent and then quickly exited through an open window.

“See you at eight.” He said after exiting the housetree. He then started exploring the town more and soon got a pretty good idea of his surroundings. It was easy to move through the town undetected because there weren’t a lot of ponies outside at this time. Those that were didn’t notice his shadow moving around. He was about to head back to Twilight when his cloaked leg was grabbed on to.

This caused him to decloak and he looked at his attacker while drawing his combat knife. It was a female minty unicorn with a lyre on its ass. He was about to stab it in the neck when he noticed it was just hugging his leg. Then it spoke.

“Humans are real! I knew it but nopony believed me not even my marefriend but look who’s laughing now.” She started to laugh insanely. He looked around and saw no ponies were around.

“Let go of me!” He demanded.

“No! I spend my whole life looking for your kind, I’m not letting go.” She said. This unicorn was really starting to piss him off.

“You have five seconds to let go of me or else!” he said in a threatening voice.

She gasped. “This is a test!” What? “If I let go I fail, don’t worry I will never let go!” Ok she had to escape from a mental asylum. But if she won’t listen to reason…

“5” She hugged his leg harder.

“4”

“3” He started to reach for her.

“2” She gave him the creepiest look ever, of all time.

“1” She didn’t move. He then hit her in the back of her neck with the side of his hand knocking her out. But she was still hugging his leg even though she was knocked out. He sighed and tried to pull her off his leg but she wouldn’t come off.

He then tried kicking his leg to flick her off but she still stayed on. I’m pretty sure this is physically impossible but then again she’s a talking pony that’s also a unicorn. He then tried to get her off of him one limb at a time. It took about a half-hour. Pleased that he managed to do the impossible he picked her up and placed her in a nearby dumpster.

He cloaked and walked away but he heard something. “Did I pass?” He then ran as fast as he could like his life depended on it back to the housetree and jumped through a closed window, to face a confused and angry purple unicorn.

“Ezra why would you do that?” She shouted at him.

“Minty… Lyre…asylum…leg…ran.” He said while still catching his breath. Twilight then cast a spell fixing the broken window and turned so she wouldn’t face him.

“Are you mad that I didn’t answer your dumb questions?” He asked.

“There not DUMB!” She shouted. I take that as a yes.

“Sorry about the window I just had to get away from her.” He said. She turned back to him.

“It’s fine a quick repair spell and it’s as good as new.” He checked his WMC it said 7:48. Twilight leaned closer to him to see what he was looking at. “What’s that?” She asked.

“Its my WMC, its standard issue for all soldiers. It can do many thing tell time, hack into foreign tech, check air toxins. But it’s not all military use it can play music and you can use it to get onto the Internet. Don’t ask what the last one is because I’m not explaining it to you.”

As he finished explaining what his WMC was, Spike ran down the steps. “Twilight it’s almost time to go.” Her eyes widened in shock. She then grabbed Ezra by his hand and let him outside.

“Come on we have to go.” She said on the verge of panicking.

“Wait, where are we going?” He asked trying to free himself from her hoof. Wait, how is she even grabbing me she has no fingers.

“We have to meet my friends at the train station at 8:00 and then knowing them they will ask you questions for about fifteen minutes then we’ll go and get tickets.”

“You planned it all out?” He asked in doubt.

“YES! That’s why we got to move.” She said. They then exited the housetree with Spike. “Come this way.” She said while still grabbing his hand.

“Let me go for a second so I can cloak.” He said.

“There’s no time, hurry.” He sighed as they ran through Ponyville. Ponies saw him and ran into their houses and locked the door. Before he knew it the whole town was empty. But they didn’t stop they kept running towards the train station. They past the market, which now was empty along with the rest of the town.

“Wow you ponies are scared easily.” He said while running.

“Yes this happens when a new creature or something comes to town.” She sighed. “It’s like Zecora all over again.”

“Who?” He asked.

“A rhyming zebra.” She answered. Once again his eye twitched. “Come on we’re almost there, I think I can see my friends.” In the distant he saw what looked like a train station and five ponies.

As they got closer he could make out more details. There was a white unicorn with a styled purple mane. Must be Sweetie Belle’s sister. Next there was a yellow Pegasus with a huge pink mane. She saw him and nearly fainted. After her was pink pony with a pink mane. It’s mane seemed to defy gravity. There was another Pegasus she was sky blue and had a rainbow mane? Ten credits she’s bi. Last was the only pony of the group he knew, Applejack.

The pink pony appeared in front of his face startling him. “HithereI’mPinkePiewhatsyournameandwhatareyouandarethosegunsbecausetheydon’tlikeanyIseenbeforeanywayswhatareyouaSPARTANnahyoudon’thavethearmormaybeyourSASsinceyouhaveagasmaskonormaybe…” He covered her mouth with his hand. But to his suspire she still kept talking even with his hand over her mouth. “Mmphmmph? Mmphmmph!”

He then looked at Twilight. “Friend of yours?” He asked.

“Yep that’s Pinkie Pie.” He looked back at the others the yellow one was hiding behind Applejack’s ass, the blue one had its hooves raised like fist and the white one was charging at him. Oh shit!

“YOU!” She yelled. “HOW DARE YOU WEAR SUCH UGLY CLOTHES!” What? “Who ever made those hideous things should be arrested, and is that animal teeth around your neck. How primitive.” I know her type, thinks she deserves to be in a higher class and acts like it. I can tell we’re not going to get along.

“Listen ma’am. These are not clothes in is a uniform and I don’t like you bad mouthing any part of it so why don’t you take your snobbly little attitude and shove it up your ass.” He wanted to say. Instead he said. “It’s a uniform not a fashion statement.”

“Still it is a crime to wear something so hideous. Come by my shop and I’ll make you something better then that.” Never going to happen. “My name is Rarity by the way what is your name.”

“Just call me Ezra, and are you related to a Sweetie Belle?”

“Aw yes, she is my little sister. She maybe annoying at times but I love her. Why did you ask?”

“You just remind me of her that’s all.” At this point Twilight spoke up.

“Rarity I see you met Ezra, he is the reason we’re going to Canterlot.” He nodded. “Ezra come on I’ll introduce you to the rest of my friends.” The three ponies one human and dragon walked toward the three other ponies.

“That is Applejack, that’s Fluttershy and that’s Rainbow Dash.” He tried not to laugh at the names. “Girls this is Ezra.” He nodded. Applejack trotted up to him.

“Wait a darn minute ah heard of ya, mah sister was talkin’ about how she was saved by a mister Ezra. That ya?” She said.

“Yes. I saved Applebloom, Sweetie Belle and Scootaloo from a manticore in the forest.” He said getting a gasp from the ponies and dragon.

“Thank ya, ya’re in mah debt.”

“Thank you also for saving my little sister.” Said Rarity.

“It was nothing.” He said not liking the attention he was being given.

“Is the manticore ok?” Asked Fluttershy. Umm… He kneeled down to her, which startled her a bit.

“I’m sorry but I had to kill it or it would have eaten them. If there was another way I would of done something different.” He said. She then gave him an angry look.

“How dare you it could have had a family! You didn’t have to kill it!” At this point she started to cry.

“Listen I did what I had to do and if it weren’t for me there would be three dead girls and one manticore with the taste of pony flesh! I know once they have the taste of flesh it doesn’t stop.” He said. After a minute she spoke again.

“Are you sure it was going to eat them?” She asked. He nodded. “ I don’t think what you did was right but…” She stopped talking and sobbed again, Rarity went to comfort her.

“We need to get our tickets the train will be here soon.” Said Twilight. They then went the ticket booth where their was a Earth pony hiding in fear. He looked at Ezra.

“Monster!” He cried out. Then something happened that Ezra didn’t expect.

“How dare you!” Screamed Fluttershy. “He’s not a monster he has saved three fillies…” She sticking up for me? Didn’t she scream at me for killing a manticore a few seconds ago? “… and apologize to him.” She finished.

“I’m sorry I called you a monster.” The pony said.

“Umm… it’s ok.” He replied. Twilight then stepped forward.

“We will like eight tickets to Canterlot please.”

“That would be one hundred and thirty bits.” She then handed him a sack of what he guessed were ‘bits’. As he handed her the tickets the train came. He blinked the train looked like it was designed by a four year old and built by a three year old. He was glad he was in a different world so no one he knew would see him riding that.

They entered the last car of the train. All the ponies inside looked at him and slowly moved to the next car until they were the only ones left. He sat on a seat with his arms crossed facing towards the ponies. Rainbow Dash sat next to him.

“So... what are you exactly?” She asked.

“I’m a human.” He answered.

“Cool. And your clothes their awesome.” She added.

“There not clothes, it’s my armor.” He repied.

“Armor? Are you in the royal guard or something?” Before he had a chance to answer Twilight spoke up for him.

“Ezra is from a different world, and in that world he is in the army. You see the reason we’re going to Canterlot is so Princess Celestia can send him home.”

“I say it must be horrible to be away from home. Your friends and family.” Said Rarity. Nope all my friends are dead and my family nonexistent.

“So Ezra you really never said what your world is like.” Asked Spike. He sighed.

“That depends past or present?” He said getting a confused look from them.

“What are ya talking about?” Asked Applejack.

“Do you want to know what my world is like in the past or what it is like currently?” He said.

“Why would we want to know about it’s past?” Asked Rainbow Dash.

“Lets just say my world was a lot better a long time ago.” He said.

“What do you mean?” Asked Twilight wanting to learn more about Ezra’s world.

“Well a long time ago my world was nice and beautiful like this one. Then the nukes fell.” He said.

“Nukes?” Asked Spike.

“Imagine a explosion that can turn an whole city into a smoking crater that is poisonous to be around.” He said causing the ponies and one dragon to shiver in the thought of that destruction. “Then… imagine almost all the countries on your planet lunching weapons that can do that at each other.”

“That’s not the worst part.” He added getting an even more scared look from them. “It’s what happened after. The plants died, the air and water became toxic, bandits and feral humans were everywhere. Mutants came from the ashes of the cities to feed on flesh. Entire species died. That is what my world is like.” He looked at their faces. All of them were crying Pinkie’s mane somehow deflated and Fluttershy fainted. Maybe I went a bit too far. “But it’s not all bad. My species is famous for adapting, and adapted we did. We rebuilt cities, and countries.”

He looked out the window at the green grass and trees as the train passed them ignoring the fact he mentally scarred them. After a minute Pinkie Pie spoke. “W-why would you want to go back to such a place?” He looked at her.

“It’s because I belong there.” He answered.

“Darling, what to you mean nopony should live there.” Said Rarity.

“No not me that belongs there, my kind.” He said. “My kind has been around for millions of years. And in that time all we raged war on each other. Vast numbers have died in our pointless wars. And no matter how many treaties we make there is always another one. It’s human nature. That’s why I need to go home I don’t deserve to be in such a nice place.” He finished. The ponies started at him with horror.

“But Ezra ya saved mah sister and her friends.” Said Applejack.

“Three lives doesn’t even come close to the amount I taken.” He said. “You see, I’m soldier I kill others for a living.” At this point the ponies back up away from him.

“W-why…” Started Rainbow Dash. Why? Again with why.

He thought for a minute. “As you heard my world is basically dead and full of danger. Danger that would rip off your skin and eat you without hesitation, that would kill you so fast that your dead before you blink. That is why I exist to fight off the danger. Soldiers were made originally to protect their cities or countries but later to rage war. I protect what is left of my species from those that would wish it harm. Yes that means I kill, I fight but I do it to protect those I care about, those I love. That is why I joined the army not to take lives but to protect them.”

“Protect lives by taking them!” said Spike. “Well it doesn’t matter soon we’ll get to Canterlot and Princess Celestia will send you back where you belong. Then we can forget all of this and more importantly you!”

“Spike!” said Twilight angrily.

“No he’s right.” Said Ezra. I don’t deserve to be here. He looked out the window and saw a city resting on the side of a mountain. Really?

“D-do you like to do what you do?” Asked Fluttershy. He turned to look at her.

“I take no pleasure in killing.”

“Then why do you do it?” She asked.

“Because I have to.” He answered.

“I d-don’t understand.” She said.

“Yes and you never will.” He then looked at Twilight. “How much longer until we get to Canterlot?”

“A-about a hour.” She said making no attempt to hide she was frightened by him. He then looked at his WMC and to his shock there was a picture being displayed on it. It was a group picture of his whole team. What the…? Each of them was dressed in their desert camouflage armor. They were standing in front of a transport truck. He remembered that mission they were sent to the African Desert to find a top-secret lab. The mission ended in failure he was captured and held for a month by the enemy and two of his teammates were K.I.A. He remembered want they did to him while captured, his escape, and the journey across the desert to join up with N.U. forces.

The ponies noticed he was staring at the glowing thing at his arm but only Twilight knew what it was. “What’s that? And whys it glowing? And why are you staring at it? And what’s the point of his fiction? I get the story is a military HiE. Whens the action happen?” Said Pinkie Pie. He ignored her and her breaking of the fourth wall because he was deep in thought. While other others just thought as it as normal Pinkie actions. Ezra then… “Wait I’m not done yet Mr. Author!” How did she do that? I didn’t write that!

“Can I make a suggestion?”

No I’m the author, I’m writing the story not you!

“But what if theres another author writing a story about you writing a story. Or Maybe…” And Pinkie Pie somehow became mute for the rest of the chapter Ha.

Ezra looked up from his WMC and saw Pinkie Pie staring angrily at the ceiling. Must be high. He looked at the others who were still frightened. Trying to calm them down he tried to make a nice conversation with them.

“So… I told you guys about myself, what about you?” He said. Rarity was the first to speak.

“Well darling if you must know I run the Carousel Boutique in Ponyville, I make dresses and suits which are worn all over Equestria. Also I…” Why the fuck did I ask? Ok I’m been in these situations before just nod at every ten words. After about five minutes of being in his happy place Rarity stopped talking… only to move on to a different subject. You know what, screw this. He drifted off to sleep.

“Awake champion you will need to listen to my Elements to better understand your duty.”

He woke up and stretched, which was unnoticed by Rarity. “…and that’s the art of the dress.”

“That was very interesting Rarity.” Said Applejack. Yeah so interesting that I fell asleep. “Well mah life is a dramatic as Rarity’s over there but has some adventures. Ah work at Sweet Apple Acres…”

“What?!?” He interrupted.

“It’s a apple farm, and mah apples are sold all over Equestria…”

“No I mean you… own an apple farm?” He said.

“Umm… yea that a problem partner?” She asked.

“It’s just where I’m from apples along with almost all fruit and vegetables are rare and therefore expensive as hell.” He said with still disbelief she owned an apple farm.

“Then what do you eat?” Asked Twilight

“Wheat, artificial foods…”

“Artificial?” Asked Rainbow Dash.

He pulled out a food pill and showed it to them. “This is a food pill it gives you the same nutrition you get for eating three meals a day.”

“That’s amazing!” Said Twilight “What else do you eat?”

“Dairy, fish, meat…”

“MEAT?!?” They all cried out.

“Umm yeah.” He looked at their scared faces and facepalmed. They don’t eat meat idiot, to them its like murder or something. “Don’t worry I am not going to eat you and besides meat is even more expensive than fruits and vegetables.” He then thought back to when he first had it.

“Ezra cheer up, there was nothing you could do.” Said Gavin. They were both in a VIP party for them in their honor. They both were wearing tuxedos and sitting at their table in the front of the large fancy dining room. They were in the twentieth floor in the N.U. Army Headquarters in April. There was a big window looking out at the city.

“I know but I feel though I still could of saved them.” He said while looking out the window.

“We both know that’s total BS, if you moved a muscle the S.P.E.A.R.S. would have the codes and we would be mutant chaw.” Said Gavin trying to cheer him.

“Hey guys.” They turned to see Sal and Aidan walking towards their table. They came to the table and sat down. “Can you believe we’re here, the fucking heads of the New Union are here!” He said.

“Yeah the ones that sent us on that suicidal mission in the first place.” Muttered Aidan while trying to light a napkin on fire.

“Aid I know that you and Sarah were close, but if you talk about the N.U. heads like that… well you know what happens. “ Said Sal. Aidan grunted in response.

“Hey check out that hottie.” Said Gavin pointing at a woman at the next table.

“Gavin she’s married to General Graff.” Said Ezra.

“So?” He asked, they all facepalmed. A waiter then brought over a tray of food.

“There’s meat!” Said Ezra after looking at the food the waiter brought.

“Yeah can you believe it? We get food pills and command gets meat and fruit!” Said Aiden.

“Never had meat before, what’s it taste like?” Ezra asked.

Sal shrugged. “Can’t really describe it.” Ezra then took a piece and put it on his plate and tried it.

“I don’t mind that you eat meat.” Said Fluttershy.

“WHAT!” They all said including Ezra.

“It’s the circle of life and his instincts make him want to eat meat. So he can’t be blamed.”

“Don’t worry I’ve only eaten meat once, and I didn’t really like it. It was too chewy and the taste…” He stopped when he saw their scared reactions. He looked around the train car for a way to change the topic. “So… Rainbow Dash is your mane natural or do you dye it?” He asked which caused Dash to look offended.

“Of course it’s natural, only an awesome mare like me would have a awesome mane like this.”

“What makes you so awesome?” He regretted asking immediately.

“Well I’m the fastest flyer in Equestria, and I got my cutie mark for preforming the sonic rainboom, and…”

“Sonic rainboom?” He asked.

“That happens when I fly so fast I break the sound barrier.” She answered.

“That’s physically impossible, a living thing can not fly fast enough to break the sound barrier. It must be fake.” She then flew up to his face, his gas mask nearly touching her muzzle.

“IT ISN”T FAKE!” She shouted.

“Then prove it.” He said. Rainbow Dash opened the window and flew out of it. Then she flew upward high into the air. He watched through the window. Then it happened. He saw her fly straight down then right before she hit the ground was a loud boom and a rainbow trail was following her. His right eye twitched as she flew back into the train car.

“Pretty awesome right? She boasted.

“But… speed… it…”

“Yep that’s always their reaction when then see something as awesome as that!” She said.

“Only a fighter jet could go that fast.” He said.

“A what?” asked Rainbow Dash.

“A fighter jet, some can break the sound barrier.”

“Yeah, well I bet I’m still faster then these ‘Fighter Jets’.” She said.

“Doubt it, some can go up to Mach 5.” He said.

“Mach?” Asked Applejack.

“Do you ponies not know about the Mach system?” He asked.

“No what is it?” Asked Twilight wanting to learn something new.

“Well the Mach system is a measure of speed. Mach 1 means your going the speed of sound. Mach 2 is twice that and so on and so on.” Said Ezra getting a shocked look from Rainbow Dash.

“S-so there’s things f-faster than me?” She said looking hurt.

“Don’t take it personally, it’s still amazing a living thing can break the sound barrier.” Rainbow Dash cheered up a bit.

“Ezra can I ask you something? If it’s alright with you.” Said Fluttershy.

“Sure, go ahead.” He asked.

“Why do you have teeth on your neck? If you don’t mind me asking.” She said.

“It’s from the creatures I killed.” He answered getting a shocked look the ponies.

“WHY WOULD YOU KILL THEM THEN WEAR THEIR TEETH LIKE TROPHIES?!?!” She shouted. It’s always the quiet ones that are the loudest, always.

“Well you see this one?” He pointed to a sharp fang. “The owner of that ate one of my friends in front of me.” He then pointed to a large curved sharp tooth. “This one was owned by a mutant that eat everyone in a whole town.” He then pointed to the one human tooth. “The owner of this was human, but inhuman. He tried to destroy all life on the planet because he believed that nothing deserved to live anymore.” He said casually.

“That’s horrible! Even if they did all these bad things you have no right wearing their teeth around like trophies.” Said Fluttershy. If she’s mad about that wait till she hears that animal’s fur is made into clothes.

“Why do you care so much about them, they were just a bunch of crazed meat eating, mutated freaks?” He asked.

“Because freaks or not they are animals and I take care of animals and those that hurt them are evil.” She said.

“Open your fucking eyes!” He shouted, which caused Twilight to give him anger glare. “The only animals on my world are mindless bloodthirsty freaks! Do you even know what mutants are?” He asked judging by their reaction they didn’t. “Mutants are creatures that used to be animals they became mutated by radiation. All of them carry diseases, some of the diseases turn you into a mutant.”

“L-like a zombie?” Asked Spike.

“Yes, that’s why some people call them the undead! It pisses me off beyond belief that you are defending these monsters.” He did not notice the irony in that statement. Fluttershy looked mad and defeated at the same time, while the others were glaring daggers at him.

The train suddenly stopped. He looked out the window and saw they were at a train station. “Thank God we’re here.” He said getting a confused look from them. “Now I lets meet your ruler, I want to get out of fucked up beyond belief land.”

Author's Note:

This chapter was hard to write, I kept having to delete a sence and rewrite it. And will be death in the chapter with the main plot moving along. Thank you everyone who fav'ed and to those that hit the dislike. #@$#$@@$ %^$#@^%$ ^$%@# #$%^%$ mom ^#%^$&^%# and #^$%^#$%# you!

Comments

[TheCrow]

Moar :)

[Fire Blitz]

Fuck shouldn't be used a whole lot.