After another year of disorder in the land of Equestria, Princess Twilight makes a program called T.W.I.L.I.G.H.T. After a year of functioning properly, it gets corrupted and starts to roll into a new program function. Ponies are disharmony!!!
a colab fic with: Vehemence he helped with story and editing.
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you need an editor, though you already pointed that out. also, I like it so far.
ten seconds in and sweetie belle is dead
hmm....looks interesting
2380477
i know right, but it was the military
2380508 okay, very interesting coment
2380155 okay i guess i could put some pony on this
2380584
being interesting is what i do best
2380584
poor sweetie
derpicdn.net/media/W1siZiIsIjIwMTMvMDQvMDUvMTdfMzdfMzZfNDhfMjg4OTMyX19VTk9QVF9fc2FmZV9zd2VldGllX2JlbGxlX2hlYXJ0X2F0dGFja19taW5lY3JhZnRfNTEwNDlhMDU3ZjEyM2I1OTdiMDAwNjQ5XzUxNWYwYmQ4N2YxMjNiN2FmMzAwMGY0Nl81MTVmMGJkODdmMTIzYjdhZjMwMDBmNDcucG5nIl1d/288932__safe_sweetie-belle_adorable_heart-attack_minecraft_ask-the-crusaders_adorable-as-fuck_artist-jan_51049a057f123b597b000649_515f0bd87f123b7af3000f47_515f0bd87f123b7af3000f46.png
2380661 i love that, yes you can grife my house
2380697derpicdn.net/media/W1siZiIsIjIwMTMvMDQvMDUvMDlfMjRfMTBfMzZfMjg4NzYwX19VTk9QVF9fc2FmZV9yYWluYm93X2Rhc2hfb2NfZGVycHlfaG9vdmVzX3Njb290YWxvb19hcHBsZV9ibG9vbV9zd2VldGllX2JlbGxlX2N1dGllX21hcmtfY3J1c2FkZXJzX2JhYnNfc2VlZF9wYXJhc3ByaXRlX2NvbHRfcG9pc29uX2pva2VfZmlsbGllcy5wbmciXV0/288760__safe_rainbow-dash_oc_derpy-hooves_scootaloo_apple-bloom_sweetie-belle_cutie-mark-crusaders_babs-seed_parasprite_colt_poison-joke_fillies.png
2380711 creepy. but i could use it.
for insperation. and you pm me the link??? id love to have it
2380717here you go
The Rise of T.W.I.L.I.G.H.T. : Pony Terminator
Equestria
Twilight
functioning
corrupted
I have not read the story, I only came here help you clean up your first impression. Aside from the typos the description is awkward in a number of places, here is a different take on it.
After years of disorder in the land of Equestria, Princess Twilight creates the T.W.I.L.I.G.H.T. initiative. After more than a year of successful operation something begins to corrupt T.W.I.L.I.G.H.T.'s core objectives.
Ponies are-, Ponies are---, Ponies are Disharmony
a colab fic with: Vehemence he helped with story and editing.
2381259 im sorry but you wasted your time some with the last part. the re writing of the diskription. the rest if toloratable, and sorta help full. but i hate help. so i guess i could fix it
any ways, the story dsn't have an officeal editor