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Lightning Dust wakes up late, to another grey, gloomy day. She's cold and tired, and she's never felt so terrible in her life. But really, all she needs is to get back into a routine, or to see her friends, or to sleep a little bit longer... then she'll be fine.
Really.
"Jesus, man."
—TheAspiringWriter93
"I'm sad now. Like.. you don't even know."
—thedarkprep
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3392942
what?
This mood is basically my entire life, but nowhere near to this extent. It seems our tiny insect bodies are full negativity, eh parasprite?
[18:44:25] Selbi: you
[18:44:28] Selbi: god
3392955
sometimes we're happy
sometimes we're sad
sometimes we're sadder
3392964
There's some sad things known to man,
But there ain't too much sadder than
The tears of a clown,
When there's no one around.
Damn.
Good job, man.
I know that feeling
Fuck you Para, fuck you.
I was happy, I got a A on my Spanish test... by cheating,
, today was 50 cent hot wings day in the cafeteria... I got 15. Today was a good day.
And then... I read this... and now I'm upset, sad, and I almost felt a tear. Almost.
That's really commendable, since the only fics that make me cry are one's that have Spike dying. I don't even like Lighting dust! And this will be the only Lighting Dust story in my favs.
Goddamn it. This really brightened up my day. Thanks.
3393028
np bb <3
Damn
Damn, this actually made me feel a little sad... Parasprite, what the hell have you done to me?
3393045
Just some minor alterations to your emotional processing unit.
3393045
He'll tell you soon.
A few hours.
Later.
Tomorrow.
Some day.
3393061
Damn it, I just managed to get it right!
3393063
He replied.
Your predictions were false.
3393071
deep down, he knew i would
3393076
Is he... a prophet!? All this time, the answer to my questions has been lurking here!
3393071
But what if he was lying to cover up the truth? What if it was too painful (or too hilarious to watch you be sad) to inform you of the truth, and he planned to tell you later? Or tomorrow? Some day?
3393076
Look at dat poker face. The small smile, and green beady eyes. You know I'm right.
3393089
3393089
Or what if you were wrong? What then, huh?
3393112
Then Lightning Dust's crushing ennui would be just a minor speed bump on the road of your life. If I were right, then we'd all be doomed.
3393094
Yep, we'd be doomed.
3393134
So the world is cursed to damnation if you're right? Well, at least I know what the cause of the apocalypse is going to be. One day, one day, you're going to get something right, and humanity will suffer for it.
3393142
Meh.
The apocalypse can happen some other time...
You know.
Tomorrow.
Three weeks from now.
...Later.
3393212
The apocalypse cannot happen while I exist, for I will stand before the endless tide of flame in golden spandex, and I will single handedly drive back the the end. It will be glorious.
3393221
Meh
3393222
The glory of such an actions doesn't even touch you; what are you, demon?!
Flames- The pain of being a former wonderbolt...
I know that.
3393239
we are legion
3393245
how am i supposed to respond to this
3393246
Then you are nought but another bringer of the end times, I shall vanquish you will the spandex of light!
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3393261
Gah, my eyes... they burn
3393252 Amethyst Shadows- If you know the same problem Derpy has.... I has it.
Despite being a great flier, they didn't trust my impaired vision...
3393275
seriously how am i supposed to respond to this
3393281 Amethyst- Hell, were you in the wonderbolt academy?
Good god. This hits, dude.
This hit hard.
Well done.
~Skeeter The Lurker
hnnnf
i
i can't
Jesus, dude. You keep doing this. Why do you keep doing this.
I don't think I've ever seen depression written so well. So viscerally - enough to feel it. Reminding you of every time you felt like that (although never to Lightning Dust's extent, at least not for me. I don't suffer from depression, but there are days. My inspiration tends to be cyclic, with me being productive for months at a time, then pretty useless for months at a time - during the latter period, I'm prone to being unable to derive satisfaction from things, stress, and moping. I usually drown myself in fic; video games don't help unless they're new and I don't know the story yet.) The hopelessness, the greyness, the lack of satisfaction in anything. Augh. That hurt. Mood = brutalized. And I was just feeling so good about myself for finishing some physics notes. Thanks a lot.
One thing that really impresses me over this - unrelatedly - is that you aren't really confined to your own headcanon when you write. You can write a story about psychotic Lightning Dust - you can write a story about depressed Lightning Dust. You don't limit yourself to your own singular views on how you think things would play out, or on how you see a character. So kudos to that.
So... rock on, parasprite. Keep brutally mauling everyone's feels. We lovehate you for that.
Well done on the non mature feature, man.(It has yet to hit the mature feature side as of writing this.)Well done on feature.
~Skeeter The Lurker
Great story Para. An emotional peek into the mind of the severely depressed. Damn fine work as always.
Damn, I feel sad now. I'mma go read something happy and pone pone.
I'm not crying but I think tears are forming in my eyes, I can relate to some moments here. Well done again Para.
The disrepair of her house reflects the state of her soul. Mare needs pillz. Sorry about yours, Para.
3393245
3393275
3393319
Either don't roleplay, or explain that you are.
3393629 Amethyst, a wall-eyed Pegasus, who has a brother in the wonderbolts. Hello there.
3393642
Who is Flames?
Am I a monster for not getting any feels from this? I mean, it was a good look into the mind of the depressed, but I only get the slightest feel of contempt. According to genetics and physicians, I should be a depressed wreck... I've never felt depressed for more than a few hours every blue moon or so. I simply beat it down with my will until I fall asleep, then I wake up fine. I can't help but feel contempt for those that allow mental issues to overpower their wills.
Meh.
3393690
nah. I didn't expect everyone to enjoy it. Thanks for reading and leaving some feedback!
While editing this, I felt like this was someone who was so deep into depression that their willpower couldn't even push forward to try and kill themselves manually. That being said, yes, I do know what this is like. Not to this extreme, no, but I have had depression and I've dealt with it. Being sent to a mental institute and then being treated for it by those who genuinely cared for my health really helped me get through it. I don't mind sharing this information, considering I've blogged about it way back when I was irrelevant (still am, no worries!). Sometimes I like to think what would've happened if I didn't tell anyone about it. Whether I'd still have officers knocking at my door and dragging me off to a hospital.
Sometimes, thinking helps me.
To be honest? Not many. I get what she's going through and I sympathize with that, but, I can't help but say that I... Can't find anything to output emotions. She's so stale, so boring, and so... Useless. I think that's the point, though. To feel nothing for Lightning Dust because she feels nothing for herself. Sure, she cries, but, she's so stuck in a cesspit of nothingness that she has become the epitome of useless. I believe, if that was the point of this story, then you accomplished it.
I'm not praising it, though. It needs some work, because it kind of repeated itself. But, that tends to happen in a fic like this.
3393690
The thing about this is that I tried to present Lightning as confused as to why she can't force herself to feel better. She knows she has the willpower to do pretty much anything she sets her mind to, which is why it's so frustrating when she suddenly encounters an obstacle that she can't overcome.
3393660
superultramegainfinitykek
3393642
Honestly, I prefer to get comments from humans, not horses... Just saying.