• Member Since 3rd Nov, 2012
  • offline last seen Nov 21st, 2014

Reverse Clopper


Comments ( 117 )
Comment posted by Reverse Clopper deleted Apr 6th, 2013

wow that's a lot to write in only a few days :l ...

2384281

Oh, I spent a couple of weeks writing this, actually. Four days is just how long it took to find time to get it all online, format it, and triple-check it to make sure I didn't make any glaring grammatical errors.

:twilightblush: I probably could've cranked the whole thing out in three days if I had absolutely nothing else to do, but, you know, real life and what-not.

Rock songs as Chapter Titles?

I think I'm in love:raritywink::twilightblush:

2384530

Eeeeyup. I was listening to music while revising chapter 2 and trying to think of a title, and 'Pretty Tied Up' came on. The rest followed pretty naturally from there.

:yay: I'm glad somebody noticed and appreciated it. Rock n' Roll forever!

Some people just have too much downtime.... Story is good...this chapter and chapter 5 (when she talks to pinkie) I'm used to it and all...but...:facehoof:

Cute story! It was a HOLY-CRAP-THIS-IS-FUCKING-INSANE story.... but still had it's cute and original ring to it. I have some requests for stories:
More Twidash?
Pinkieshy?
Rarijack?

:twilightblush:

-Twilight/Shay

2385790

INSANE

:pinkiecrazy: WHO TOLD YOU!?

Those are my ships, so yeah, you can expect to see them eventually.

Can't say I like TwiDash...

I do appreciate the GNR and Aerosmith song chapter titles though.
Rock on, dude.

I followed until the part with the Changeling, and then I lost all knowledge of what was going on. Otherwise, great.

2386768

:rainbowdetermined2: Rock n' Roll is my religion and my law.

2387062

Can you tell me when exactly you lost track of the story so I can try and improve? Was it the whole scene in general? Was it the way I referred to the changeling as both Rainbow Dash and 'the changeling' in a single paragraph?

'preciate the critique. Thanks.

Fun Fact: Cabron (male goat) is often used by spanish-speaking persons to insult other people :twilightblush:

2387274

Ah, yes, it has many meanings.

The title (like all the other chapter titles) was pulled from my iTunes® library.

It belongs to a Red Hot Chili Peppers song, and I believe, in the context they were using it, it translated roughly to 'whore'. Which is the way I meant it, referring to Rarity.

But I'm aware that it also translates to 'asshole'. Which isn't so much how I meant it.

2386163 it is a really cute story though! Awesome job! Did you do any other Twidash stories? If so... Tell me the names of them!!!! Thanks


-Twilight/Shay

2387485

Thanks, I'm glad you liked it!

Alas, this is the only proper TwiDash fic I've written to date.

There's a brief scene in the fifth chapter of my first fic;

http://www.fimfiction.net/story/61127/5/a-brief-window-of-opportunity/13-minutes-in-heaven

But there isn't very much, and you'll have to wade through some first-person human-on-Dash oral sex to get to it. Plus, I don't consider that fic to be part of the headcanon-universe I'm establishing in my other fics, even though I've maintained the personalities of all the characters, more or less.

She thinks about Twilight a bit in Pants, but Twi doesn't make an appearance.

I will definitely write more TwiDash in the future, though.

2387570 Thanks Sugarcube!!!!!! I will read them. Member' keep the story requests in mind! :twilightsmile:

2387570 So you are hoping to write more? Woop!
Anywhoo, this was better than expected, especially the end of the changeling scene, that was golden. With the ending, the realisation was great, very easily imaginable.
With that I say farewell and thanks for all the fis- wait... liked, favourited and watched for future fics, I await more :twilightsmile:

S73

This is great... Absolutely unique and awesome in so many ways. Grammar, sentence structure, and other more minor details might need some work- but this is more than solid- it has a plot-line and execution the likes of which I never see.

To put it another way this fic was adorable, heartbreaking, sexy, tender, and dramatic all at the same time- nearly perfect. 10/10 (this is my new benchmark too, BTW)

If you want me to help you improve your writing, I don't think I can be of much help- you seem to be at or above what I can teach without picking apart your entire thing making tiny and relatively unhelpful suggestions.

Moar? I'd love to see it.

2388318

Glad you liked it! Thanks for the watch!

2388756

:twilightblush: Aww, shucks. Thanks man.

If you've got any critique that you can give, I'd love to hear it— even 'relatively unhelpful' is still helpful.

Moar for sure.

Headcanon: Violated!:flutterrage:

Still weirdly compelling. A thumbs up, but no star.

CWi

I don't normally do TwiDash... nonetheless this was brilliant! :pinkiehappy:

2391425

Yes, yes it was. Bands by chapter:

Ch1: AC/DC
Ch2: Guns N' Roses
Ch3: Aerosmith
Ch4: Red Hot Chili Peppers
Ch5: Def Leppard
Ch6: Led Zeppelin
Ch7: Van Halen
Ch8: Aerosmith

2392433

Do not fear, my child. Soon all shall be converted so that they see my shining light and the guidance and truth it offers.

2392577

Glad to hear it!

TwiDash is my absolute favorite Mane 6 pairing, but I understand that not everyone likes it, so I try to make their relationships... flexible. In a silly, awkward, entertaining sort of way.

Twilight if you want my honest advice, you should get really drunk. :rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::rainbowlaugh::duck:

There ain't no party like a Pinkie Pie party!

2393314

:twilightblush: R-Rainbow... *hic* *giggle* I... *hic*

You are soooooooo cute. *hic* Like... seriously... C'mere... I wanna... I wanna preen you. *hic* C'mere.

*clumsily magic-handles Rainbow closer*

2394294

'Cuz a Pinkie Pie party isn't constrained by the laws of physics or any other precepts of reality.

2392578

Finally, someone who knows more than just the hits, but also the GOOD songs :yay:

Ooo, I like the dream thing. You've made the sex scenes structurally important to the narrative, always a good thing, and even including the final one. Sex is much better at causing problems than solving them, getting the resolution mid-clop is a neat trick. :rainbowwild:

Could have used one more direct confrontation between Twilight and Dash, I think. Something to let them partially work through the fear and awkwardness that was keeping them apart. Without that you've sidestepped the primary conflict. That is a proper deus ex machina up there, or whatever the feminine of "deus" is.

2398220

Something to let them partially work through the fear and awkwardness that was keeping them apart.

:facehoof: Aw, that would've been perfect. I felt like there was something missing from the last chapter, and I guess that was it...

Ooo, I like the dream thing.

I'm glad. The idea of opening with the 'all just a dream' trope and closing with the same trope (with a crazy twist), was the inspiration for the entire story.

good thing twilight didnt hear. shovels only work if the thing your burying is in one big pile.

Sooo... It sounds like there will be a sequel?

This was pretty good. Some parts were awkward, but I enjoyed it overall. I'd get specific if I was awake enough to remember.

2399498

Sequels, prequels, paraquels—

All my stories (Excluding 'A Brief Window of Opportunity') are inter-related and reference each other. This fic is, to a significant extent, a sequel to Pants, in which Rarity helps Rainbow come to terms (partway) with her feelings, making this story possible. I'm currently working on another story that comes after Pants but before this, and possibly a sequel. My current focus is fleshing out AJ.

As far as awkwardness, that was probably intentional. My philosophy is that sex is always awkward, except under certain special conditions, and one of those conditions is that nobody is watching. And we are watching. Plus, it is a comedy, after all.

2393314 and see Pinkie Pie

Why is Pinkie always a slut in fanon

2399860

Ah alright.

Also, I more meant in awkward in terms of execution and structure, but I didn't mind it very much. It was a good read.

men, maravilloso trabajo, en serio me gusta tu historia, en sierta forma parese de anime lo que me agrado, pero que tal una secuela con menos capitulos y mas accion?:raritywink::heart: ps: brony de mexico.

2400089

:pinkiegasp: Partying with just one pony for the rest of my life?

:pinkiehappy: I've got way too much love to give for that!

I do want to try and differentiate her from a 'slut', though, in that I want to make it seem as though she really truly is in love with the entire town, and her orgies are an expression of that boundless and inexplicable love. Whether or not all the participants reciprocate Pinkie's feelings is... questionable.

Aside from the fact that I think it fits her personality to have sex with as many ponies as possible, I think it's good for Fluttershy. I doubt she would have the energy to keep up with Pinkie's needs alone. Think about it— Pinkie is a creature who sees nothing wrong with throwing a party immediately after a party to celebrate the fact that there was a party. If we assume that orgasm≈party, Fluttershy would have no time left to take care of her animals. Having 2 Pinkie Pies 69 would probably tear a hole in the fabric of reality...

:twilightoops: ...which, in retrospect, probably explains all the fourth-wall breaking.

2400541

I see. Are there any parts that stand out as particularly awkward? I would definitely like to improve as an author, and I know this isn't my best work, though I'm not the best at figuring out why.

2400945

¡Me alegro de que te haya gustado! Mi español está bastante oxidado...

Me gustaría dividir la acción, pero puedo tratar de poner más de él en historias de futura.

2401451

It's kind of hard to explain... I read it all in practically one go, so new info was constantly replacing the old, and specific areas are really fuzzy. I'm also not the best at backing myself up with examples and the like, though English has always been a very strong area for me.(more or less has to do with it being more of something that's second nature to me, even if I don't know mechanics and the like by name)

What I CAN do though, is make an effort to speak up in new stuff you do that catches my interest, as it's easier when I still have things fresh in my head.

2402099

:twilightsmile: Alright, cool. I'll be on the lookout for more of your comments in the future.

"even an unprotected flight through space would be perfectly plausible, though quite painful."

I don't think she'd be able to survive her blood boiling, her skin melting, and her breath being forcefully sucked out all at once. I know I completely missed the point here, but... y'know.

2403134

Actually, as long as you don't try to hold your breath, even you could easily survive 30 seconds in a vacuum. Your skin is surprisingly strong.

And you wouldn't exactly die after 30 seconds, you'd just pass out from lack of oxygen, and die about 100 seconds later.

http://imagine.gsfc.nasa.gov/docs/ask_astro/answers/970603.html

i.imgur.com/cCazDaK.jpg

2404061

Excellent!

Just remember two things. First, a good stalker is only seen frequently enough to raise suspicion, but not often enough to be proven as a stalker.

Second, if you're going to take pictures... No flash photography, and my left side is the good one. :duck:

2404104
Nah, I just hack into government satellites... ever seen thermal imaging that can see through walls? Crazy stuff. Plus it's like I'm always on top.

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