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RariDash363 stories ·991 members
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When Rarity and Rainbow Dash discover that they disagree on a point close to their hearts, they decide to settle their differences the only way two mature mares can: by forcing each other to embarrass themselves.
With thanks to GlueFactory, WhatTheMoo and Icarus_Gizmo for editing, and Equestria Daily for featuring me! Cover art by OsakaOji.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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What is it with so many bronies making stories so much like real episodes?
...
I LIKE IT!
This was fantastic and I'll betcha it's gonna get featured. Fabulous job, darling.
Comedy tag?
It's because of stories like this that I don't have to be too sad even though I think the show has irrevocably declined. Nice plot, loved the interactions between Rainbow and Rarity, it felt just like watching an excellent episode. Job well done.
Is this the other half of 'In which Twilight attempts to eat a sandwich'? Im sure Rarity was taking Dash to the spa in revenge for something while Twi was ordering the sandvich.
2362745 You're probably right, but let's let the author have his say.
Maphysto, this is a great little slice-of-life piece, and Rarity's and Dash's responses felt believable throughout. I kinda feel like Dash's half of the bet seems glossed over a bit, but that's probably the nature of following up an action packed competition scene with a spa trip. I would have suggested that you go over Rainbow's reaction more, but after re-reading, I think it's handled decently enough.
I'm personally glad that you didn't overplay the "waaahhh I'm out of my comfort zone and I hate it" angle. This story could have very easily traveled into the realm of whiny dialogue and constant protests, but I'm glad that they were willing to compromise instead for the sake of their friendship (and the bet, I suppose).
The only problem...I personally can't see how anypony can view the Wonderbolts' costumes as anything other than awesome.
You're two for two in my book. Keep it up!
2362745
Well, not other half per se. They're basically separate stories. The "Rarity takes Rainbow to the spa" idea was at first just an incidental excuse for them to show up in the Sandwich story, but as I was casting around for ideas for a new fic, I realized the idea had potential if I expanded it a bit.
2363367
Thanks! One of the benefits of writing pony fics is how well-characterized the characters are in the show. You can basically just pick two at random, put them in a room, and watch the dialogue write itself. Rainbow and Rarity were fun to write since you don't see them interact all that much in the show.
See, I knew there was a reason why I follow you! Rainbow's and Rarity's reactions seem like they're straight from one of the FIM writers' pen. The story was just the right length too, it didn't get old, nor did it feel empty. Keep up the pace and you'll be on the road to one of my favorite writers on Fimfiction.
Nicely done. You did capture their voices really rather well, in my never-even-slightly-humble opinion.
How could anyone downvote this?? I thought it was quite well done, with good characterization, nice pacing, and a wonderful premise. The hoofball match got a little confusing, but it's very hard to keep that many characters straight, and I don't think it could really have been done much differently while still describing the action.
I thought the spa scene was particularly good, and the quiet conversation was very well suited to the two of them- a side of RD we don't get to see much.
RariDash is my new OTF! (One True Friendship!)
Is this
Is this my two ponies who are best
interacting in any shape or form?
Why yes, I will read this. (I'll make sure to comment when I do! Also hey Featherprop!)
That was so like me and a friend. She dared me to let her paint my toes and then I said she had to play volleyball and WIN for the thing. Long story short, she won and I took the polish off when I got home that night...
I'm such a great friend.
Wonderful! Just wonderful. I loved how you managed to put the characters into situations they wouldn't usually seek, and yet they stayed in character. It could easily be a good episode as well.
Why the fuck wasn't this featured?
Okay, listen, I'm going to treat and criticize this like an actual episode, and not a fanfiction.
....
I liked it.
We've rarely, if ever seen RD and Rarity interact in the show and have an episode centered around their relationship. Fanfiction hasn't helped, given that most fic involving them are shipfics (erg). It's nice to have a fic involving these two and having them actually interact as friends. I appreciate how you kept them in character and still allowed them to compromise.
I suppose the moral has been done to death, and the resolution was PRETTY obvious, but there was some unique execution here. I mean, Rarity didn't FULLY enjoy sports, and RD didn't FULLY enjoy the spa. They did find some things they liked though, and they found a resolution to their conflict.
Props.
http://www.fobequestria.com/2013/08/fan-fiction-review-45-dont-knock-it.html
A nicely thought out piece. Rarity makes for a good tactition and Rainbow might just see some aerodynamic value to, at least, a well brushed and smooth mane.
Awesome; I really want to see Rainbow's mane in a braid like that now.
3121830
That's an impressive review! I'm flattered you thought the fic worthy of being given one, and I'm glad you enjoyed it.
As I said in an earlier comment, I specifically picked Rainbow and Rarity for this because we hardly ever see them interact in the show, which is a shame... their character dynamics play so well off each other that their dialogue damn near wrote itself.
I'd also like to point out that I'm aware of the hefty size difference between the hoofball/spa scenes. It's something I struggled with as I wrote, and I did what I could in the editing phase. Ultimately I resigned myself to the fact that there wasn't a hell of a lot I could add to the spa scene without artificially padding it, and looking back, I rather like the idea of the story having a bit more of a low-key wrap-up after the long, action-heavy hoofball scene. Your mileage may vary, of course.
In the end, though, I'm pleased to know you found this story to be on par with official episodes; that's just about the highest compliment a Slice of Life fic can be paid. Thanks again for your review!
3122890
Glad you enjoyed the review.
I'm not wholly surprised you knew about the size difference. It did seem a little weird that you would write a story like this and suddenly rush to the end. I understand why you made the choice you made.
Loved the story. I have often thought that Rainbow Dash and Rarity's friendship was something most writers overlook, and considering how vastly different they are, I think it is well worth exploring. I could see something like this actually happening in the show, (in fact, I hope Season 4 does an episode with Rarity and Rainbow Dash,) and it was pretty well-written. Plus, you got on Equestria Daily. Nice work, and keep it up!
I have to admit, this story made me smile a lot. Up-vote and favorite.
Really enjoyed that.
It was a nice take on the formulae of 'Rarity doing something dirty' and 'Rainbow doing something girly' in that they both came to enjoy the other's activity rather than adamantly reviling it throughout the entire story.
Well done mate, this is a lovely story
This was great! This felt like it could be dropped into the series as an episode, and no one outside the know would be the wiser. It certainly beats "Spike at Your Service" into the dust. Lighthearted, well written fun all the way around.
fantastic fic! really enjoyed it, if I were to make constructive criticism, there were a few points where it sort of shifted from ponies to humans, "Bon Bon picked up the ball and held it under one arm" for example. It's fine, but it did throw me off a bit, might be something to bear in mind for later fics. Appart from that very well written, good job
Eeeeeeeeeeeeee
Me gusta mucha
Very nice story, I also suddenly find myself wanting art of Dashie with braids
nice to see you showing the canon writers how little time rarity and RD get throughout the series. I actually find writing stories that would fit the next season of pony, to be harder than going on your own tangent, but I could literally see myself watching every scene in your story with pastel colored clarity. nicely done!
Just a teensy error I noticed:
"And besides, I didn’t really expect Rarity to play a whole hoofball match."
The sentence should use "she" considering that the rest of the story is written in the third person.
Besides that, the story was short and basic plot-wise, but sweet and very episode-like.
2903380
It was featured on Equestria Daily!
3133964
But not here.
From the story cover and description, it sounds a lot like the Look before you Sleep episode. I loved that episode!
Looking forward to this :D
2363367 I find them kind of OTT myself. I like blue and yellow as colour designs (Soarin' and Spitfire look nice side by side), but the patterns seem sort of...off to me. That said, I agree with everything you've mentioned here.
It's this kind of writing, the kind that invokes imagination to the point where I see events play out, that I love the most. The characters feel alive, the environments seem tangible, it's all expertly crafted.
An overall well-done story, and an excellent read. As many have said, a lot like an episode of the show, which only adds to the effect. Had fun reading this!
I really loved seeing Rarity and Rainbow Dash actually spending time with one another, and I would love to see something similar to this appear in the show. The story got a few laughs from me, and the characters were great. Good job!
The sequel could be pinkie daring twilight to be more bombastic, and in exchange pinkie has to sit still and read a book.
dun dun duuun!
Hahah, this was quite the read. I enjoyed this quite well.
You did a remarkable job at playing the characters and it worked awesomely.
Very well done, man.
~Skeeter The Lurker
This was a really good story! As so many others have said, it's like reading an episode from the show. You really got the characterization between Rarity and Rainbow Dash down perfect, especially the way they interact with one another and how their personalities play off the differences between them. Really good work!
It has been said, but this was wonderfully episode-like. I love reading fics like this!
Huh, you know, you really don't see enough fics that fit the shows episodic format, but this does feel close to the show.
Its a great change in pace to see a story the reads like the show plays. Kudos on that, on top of just being a good story.
Simple and effective, I like it!
This right here is why I love Rainbow Dash. If anyone you know suffers from a lack of self-confidence, just let Rainbow Dash show them the path to boldness. We are all awesome in our own way; we just tend to focus on our flaws.
I was very close to overlooking this story, but I'm glad that I took the time to read this wonderful masterpiece.
I've learned countless lessons from this story of less than 10,000 words that it almost feels miraculous... maybe even magical. Thank you.
Loved it! I haven't read anything about these two together before, so it was a refreshing to see them go at it. Just one question though, when is this gonna be turned into a real episode?
Friendshipping at its best. with some great interaction between Best Pony and RD. While the hoofball match was a tad bit too self-indulgent, the great thematic constancy and the great understanding of each side made it great.
That was a pleasant story, even though I didn't understand a word of the sports scene....
Good work, First story that i read that could be made into an Official episode. Unfortunately won't happen, but the quality of the story represents what the show stands for. Kudos for that. I don't have much for constructive criticism... All I can say is don't mess with the kool-aid and don't fix what is not broken.
Well Written and solid plot. Oh there was one thing, I was hungry for a little more detail on Dash and the spa, but won't be necessary because the objective was still achieved. I give (*****) five stars. The Fifth because of the Official Episode Quality, It really felt like My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic.
That is saying something right there too.
Mr. Flare
3264433 thanks for the recomendation ! this is a great story. i really could see this as an episode
3138335 let me guess. after applejack and fluttershy do that
Written like an actual episode. Cheers, mate - have a hearty and well-deserved thumbs-up!