• Member Since 8th Oct, 2012
  • offline last seen Monday

Timey-Wimey


T

Rainbow Dash wakes up in the middle of a pine tree forest, badly injured, unable to move and unable to speak. The only thing she can remember before she was knocked unconscious was colliding with the sharp branches of a pine tree. Now she lays in the middle of a forest, vulnerable and in mute agony.

Chapters (2)
Comments ( 37 )

Seriously... We need more...

I totally didn't steal the hallucination idea from The Descent. Nopenopenope.

But in all seriousness, when I get bored I read random horror movies on Wikipedia. The ending to The Descent freaked me out real bad and I only read it! So I took the basic idea and made it into the ending to this story.

The original ending was Rainbow's friends finding her, but she's already dying from her weakness and dies on the way back to Ponyville.

This story was mostly my attempt at writing something without dialogue. I think it turned out pretty good.

Now I want to cry. :raritydespair:

Now THAT was one of the BEST twist endings I have ever read. Very Well Done. Actually, I just might favorite this. Once again, great job.

Serious question.

WHY does nobody in Ponyville invest in any sort of flamethrower?

hahahah twist ending...

Owch.At least they'll eat her quickly.

Well, that was depressing. Poor Dash, most murdered pony in all of Equestria :derpytongue2:

Seriously, though, nice twist. :twistnerd: I didn't see it coming at all, which, I guess, was the point. And oh Sweet-Celestia-on-a-Bun, the Descent. I remember watching it at a sleepover years ago - no sleep was had that night, and many jimmies were rustled.

Damn. Dat ending. :fluttercry:

Very well written! But... it's so sad :raritycry:! She just MUST survive :fluttercry:...

I agree with the More comment's.

Its been to long since a great Rainbow tragdey story has been posted I enjoyed read this alot it satisfied my sadistic mind. The ending was great I did not see that coming at all. If you want I have pic that would be much better for your cover image if want me to link it to you later. I already have premission to use it too. (She laying on the ground with blood, brusies and bones showing) I think it would suit your story much better if you wanted. Again I loved this story keep the Dash tragedys coming please. Btw I would really love to read your original ending too, I really really really really want to read your original ending. You have no idea how much I want to read your original ending Please?

A great story. I don't think anypony saw that twist ending coming.

Thanks for the alt ending it was great so do you want that pic I metioned?

2318015 Yes please. That'd be a great picture for this story.

i love the story and love the idea but i hate one shots. i had the potential to be a multiple chapter fic with more story to it and it could have been EPIC!

that saying i did love chapter 1 very much. alternate ending was predictable and fairly common and...kinda dumb. it's generic. something very expected....the first chapter gave us something unexpected and exciting....alternate ending...is like a kids drawing doodles compared to a museum art peice.....

I loved both endings! Could definitely see this as a multi-parter, but this is great as is.
Great work! :twilightsmile:

That ending, not gonna lie Dick move man, Dick move

That ending... damn. I like it, despite the huge blocks of text.

Wow, alternate ending is awesome too! Very very very great work. Nothing more to say :rainbowkiss:!

Firefeather, you pretty much spoke my mind.

I was panicking that there would be no alternate ending...
Thank Celestia. :yay:

what happens after she woke from her hallucination in the first chapter?:rainbowderp:

2366498 Lets just say the Timberwolves tasted the rainbow.

:ajbemused: Who brought those darnd' timber wolves on the scene again?

2610712 The amazing Timey-Wimey did! :D

Interesting. The story seems to be strictly focused on Rainbow Dash suffering. Ultimately I had to call it art and favorite it.

D:flutterrage:mn, that is the most twisted ending I have ever seen.

Comment posted by Feather_Blaze deleted Feb 22nd, 2018

Yeah I definitely enjoy this better.

Outside of Rainbow Dash's hallucination, the six Timberwolves stared down at their prey with hungry luminescent green eyes.

HOLY CRAP, THAT WAS QUITE THE PLOT TWIST, I WAS NOT EXPECTING THAT

My grading scale is simple:

10/10: might make a fanfic reading or an audio drama of this on my YouTube channel

9/10: still might make a reading on my YouTube channel, but probably not an audio drama.

8/10: adding this to my big favorites library

7/10: adding this to my favorites library, not the big faves

6/10: definitely coming back to this in the future.

5/10: might come back.

4/10: might come back once or twice

3/10: definitely not coming back

2/10: giving criticism about the story

1/10: hating the story overall

even though i haven't read the alternate ending yet, here is my grade: 7/10

this is what i was expecting in the real ending, dash actually getting rescued by her friends and not about to get eaten by timberwolves

with this alternate ending, my grade has changed for this fic, and since it is the final chapter, it's going to be my final grade for this fic.

final grade is this: 8/10

Login or register to comment