Awkward, But Worth It

by bahatumay

Interlude [semi-canon 150 favorites extra]: That Time Your Little Sister Walks In On You

Author's Note:

Thanks for your support of this story! You guys are great and deserve a much better bonus than this.
This is considered an interlude because it’s not centered on AppleDash (that's why it's not being posted as an actual chapter) and is semi-canon because although set in the same universe, it does take place in the future.

Assumptions. They can be helpful, or they can be disastrous. It is commonly accepted that an assumption should be treated as just that until further solid evidence is procured, and that nothing be done on an assumption alone.

For example, if two ponies were engaging in intimate acts in a bedroom and assuming that the creaky staircase would give them sufficient warning as to approaching invaders, it would definitely be wise to test this assumption; or, at the very least, take the precaution of barricading the door. After all, one participant might have a little sister who has recently acquired a cutie mark of repair and, in gleeful abandon, that little sister might have taken the liberty of repairing anything and everything she could get her hooves on. Like a creaky staircase. Or squeaky door hinges. Or a bed that didn’t quite settle just right.

So when Apple Bloom heard the shaking coming from upstairs, her first assumption was that there was something that needed repairing and was calling her name. She quickly checked the toolbelt that she hadn’t taken off since Mac had given it to her three weeks ago and, when she had determined that all her tools were there, headed up the stairs. She paused as she heard repeating grunting sounds, and she scurried up the stairs faster, certain that her sister was having trouble and needed her help.

As it turned out, she did not.

There is a universal terror, more common than spiders and more severe than snakes. This is one that ponies can't control. It grips you and freezes you. There is absolutely nothing as horrifying as being in the middle of having sex, and hearing the door bang open, especially when you know that the only other pony home is family.

“Applejack? Are you o- kay...?” She cocked her head at what she was seeing. “What’s goin’ on in here?”

Rainbow Dash recovered and quickly separated herself from her marefriend, wiping off her mouth before responding, "This isn't what it looks like..."

Apple Bloom looked over to her sister, who was blushing approximately as red as her cutie mark. "It looked like she was putting her mouth on your... mare bits."

Rainbow Dash thought for a moment, and, seeing no possible way that this could end well, decided that honesty would be the best policy. "Ok then, it was exactly what it looked like."

Apple Bloom took a horrified step back. "That's disgusting! You pee from there! Why would anypony want to put their mouth down there?"

Rainbow briefly considered mentioning something else in that general area that was good for putting mouths on, but quickly decided against it, and turned to Applejack to see how she would respond. Applejack quickly tried to think of something to say, but her mind went absolutely blank. All she could do was smile in mortified embarrassment.

“Ah’m disgusted,” Apple Bloom said, shaking her head and turning away. She headed back down the stairs, not even bothering to close the door behind her.

* * *

“And they’re just talkin’ with me afterwards like it’s natural or sommat!” Apple Bloom ranted. Cheerilee sat at the table, trying to keep a neutral expression as Apple Bloom attempted to describe what she had witnessed. “It ain’t natural at all! It’s weird and strange and just... weird!”

Cheerilee smiled. “Well, I can imagine why you’d feel like that. Seeing sexual conduct like that in person can be a bit shocking, especially when it’s your own sister.”

“That ain’t sexual conduct,” Apple Bloom said. “That’s just... well, weird.”

Cheerilee shrugged. “You know, every pony likes doing different things. It’s not wrong; it’s just different.”

“'Unnatural’'s more like it. Ah mean, have you ever done that? No, Ah didn’t think so.”

Cheerilee coughed and attempted to divert the conversation. “And even if I had, you should remember that just because one pony thinks it’s strange, that doesn’t make it wrong. Did you know that in some areas, fried grasshoppers are a delicacy? I could never eat them, but some ponies really like them.” (1)

Unfortunately, Cheerilee’s diversion method was only tried-and-true when working with the children she usually taught. Apple Bloom was a bit older and wiser (or perhaps ‘cynical’ was the right term?). She looked at Cheerilee with a slightly disgusted look. “So that means last night, then?”

Cheerilee flushed ever so slightly. “Today, actually,” she said quietly, hiding her face in her hooves as she remembered just how she was woken up this morning.

“Argh!” Apple Bloom threw her hooves into the air. “Mah whole family’s goin’ nuts!”

“You know, Apple Bloom, sometimes it’s not a bad thing to try something new,” Cheerilee said, trying to salvage anything productive from this conversation.

“It’ll be a cold day in Appleoosa afore Ah let any pony’s mouth near there,” Apple Bloom retorted icily. “And even if Ah did, Ah got twenty bits what say it feels nothin’ but weird.” Turning sharply, Apple Bloom stomped out of the kitchen, leaving behind a rather worried Cheerilee.

* * *

Apple Bloom paced again, this time in the clubhouse. “And even Miss Cheerilee’s lettin’ mah brother nose around down there! It’s like mah whole family’s on crazy pills!”

Pipsqueak nodded hesitantly. When he had told Apple Bloom that he intended to be there for her always ready to talk about anything, he hadn’t realized just how personal and awkward these conversations could be.

“Ah mean, sex is one thing. Ah’m fine with that, bein’ a natural thing and all.”

She didn’t see the blush on Pipsqueak’s face at this line.

“But then doin’ somethin’ like that? Ah don’t know what’s gotten inta them.” She continued pacing angrily. “Ah mean, it’s not like normal ponies do that. Have you ever thought of doin’ that? Pokin’ around a mare’s...” But her voice trailed off here as she looked over and saw Pipsqueak nervously reaching up and brushing over a lock of mane while looking down and off to one side.

“Oh, come on!” Apple Bloom threw back her head and stomped angrily. “Et tu, Pipsqueak?”

“I- in my defense...”

“Save it! Ah don’t wanna hear it.” She turned and stomped away.

Pipsqueak looked down and shrunk ever so slightly. It wasn’t his fault his mind wandered; really, it wasn’t. He waited, listening for the door to slam shut... but it didn’t.

“Fine.”

“Wha-?” Pipsqueak looked up to see Apple Bloom walk back over, turn around, and lift her tail.

“Fine. Let’s see what all the fuss is about.” She turned and glared. “But if’n you don’t stop when Ah say stop, you’ll be lucky t’ have two teeth left in your mouth when Ah'm through with you.”

* * *

Later that evening, Cheerilee sat at her desk grading papers. Well, she was trying to, anyway. eyes and pen were on the homework, but her mind was elsewhere. She couldn’t stop thinking about Apple Bloom, and hoped that there would be no awkwardness between them as a result of their earlier conversation.

She shook her head and sighed. Yeah, right. She had already had plenty of awkwardness here in this house, and could see no way that this could possibly be worth it.

As she struck out yet another one of her own corrections that had actually been wrong, the very pony she had been thinking of walked in.

“Cheerilee?”

Cheerilee looked up and smiled, hoping to have some semblance of normalcy. “Hi, Apple Bloom. How are you?”

Apple Bloom silently walked over to the desk, set a bag of bits next to her papers, said, “Don’t tell Mac,” and walked out. With growing apprehension, Cheerilee dumped the bag out and counted out exactly twenty bits. She looked over at the door where Apple Bloom had departed and easily put two and two together.

A deep, conflicting feeling came over her. The teacher part of her was ecstatic that Apple Bloom had taken a chance, had tried something new, and had ended up enjoying it. The other part felt as though she had corrupted an innocent pony, had somehow taken something that could never be returned. Even though she had been there watching as Apple Bloom had grown into the lovely young mare she was today, Cheerilee still had trouble seeing her as anything but that little, curious filly in her classroom with the wide, innocent eyes and always ready smile.

As she sat there pondering, Applejack walked in. “Hey, Chi?” she asked, using the nickname she had picked up somewhere over the years.

Cheerilee looked up. “Yes?”

“C’n Ah talk to you about somethin’?”

Cheerilee nodded. “Of course,” she said, sliding the papers over so she appeared open and ready to listen. "What’s on your mind?”

Applejack removed her hat and rubbed the back of her neck sheepishly. “Ah think Ah’ve scarred my sister fer life, and Ah have no idea what Ah should do. See, she walked in on me and Rainbow havin’ a little... uh... you know, and... well... she didn’t take it so good.”

Cheerilee coughed, and it wasn’t because of Applejack’s use of ‘good’ instead of ‘well’. She quickly opened a drawer and slid the bits inside before turning and smiling her teacherly smile. “I think that she’ll come to terms with what she’s seen sooner than you’d think. She might look at you funny for a week or so, but I’m sure she’ll accept it as normal pony behavior in no time.”

Applejack sighed in relief... and then paused. “You know more than you’re tellin’,” she accused.

Cheerilee groaned and threw her hooves into the air in defeat. What, was she getting old and losing her touch?

“Do Ah want to ask?”

“No, I- I don’t think so,” Cheerilee answered honestly.

Applejack hesitantly nodded, placed her hat back on her head, and turned and left the room.

Cheerilee sighed. That had been more than a bit awkward, and not quite worth it.

Well, it had been for Apple Bloom.

Cheerilee slapped herself in the face, got up, and turned out the light. That was enough life for today. Maybe tomorrow would have some semblance of normalcy again.

Author's Note:

1) It’s too bad ponies are generally herbivores. I would have liked to use the real life example of menudo, or tripe. Basically, you take a cow stomach, cut off the top and bottom to let the contents drain, and then you chop it up and boil it. It tastes like beef, but feels like you’re chewing on an eraser. You can hold it in your teeth on the left side and use your tongue to stretch it over to your right side...

I’ve actually written most of the chapter where Applejack teaches Cheerilee the phrase, but since I didn’t want to post too many interlude chapters in a row, we’ll prolly have one more schoolwork one and then send Rainbow Dash and Applejack up to Wonderbolts tryouts before I post it.

Originally, Apple Bloom made this bet with her sister, but now that Cheerilee’s around, I figured it’d be nice to have a little interaction with her. I suppose she's a cross between an older sister and a mother-figure now, and I think I'd like to play with that some more.

Of course, the complete reference that Cheerilee makes is, “Take chances! Make mistakes! Get messy!” but I didn’t feel the second really applied there. And Apple Bloom obviously didn’t think it was a mistake, either. But she got the first and the last, and two for three isn’t bad.

...ok i think that’s enough author noting for now kthxbai why did i post this

Comments

[Tchernobog]

So all day I've been reading, getting my updates list to around 5 (one fic that is taking me a while to read since i can't quite seem to get into it). And all day, fics have been updating, so the number has been going up and down like crazy. So when I see the number jump up again, I throw my hands in the air. "Argh!"

And then see this updated.

And then, read this.

Poor 'Bloom. Or rather, lucky Pip?

[Hobbestc]

Definately lucky Pip. Or not so lucky. Cause I don't think he got to do any more then that. lol.

[bahatumay]

2771771
2772421
Author says lucky Pip... until Big Mac finds out
I kid, I kid.

[JetstreamGW]

2772451 Feh. if Mac does anything Apple Bloom will introduce him to alternative uses for a carpentry vice.

[JetstreamGW]

2771771 Shit, I'd say go Bloom. She might've lost her one-sided bet but she gained very useful knowledge. And other things.

[bahatumay]

2772535
:spittake:
Laughing and wincing at the same time is an interesting sensation.

2772601
Thanks!

[Callisto]

You said person instead of pony at one point.

Man, this was awkward to read. But so worth it.

And... I usually don't like to ask these things ... But were you referencing anything when you mentioned how Cheerilee woke up that morning?

Anyways, great chapter!

[bahatumay]

2778883
Thanks!
I did, but "seeing it in pony" just sounded wrong to me.
If I did, it wasn't intentional. Actually, that's not true. I suppose this fml inspired it, but with a less painful ending. That being said, I do get ideas from pretty much anything and everything. Was there a close reference you thought I had used?

[Callisto]

2778982 ......there may or may not be a short like that in my collection of shorts.... >_> <_< Which may or may not be about the same subject matter. Except ....more....*cough* cloppy....

ANYWAYS, I'm going over here, now.

[bahatumay]

2779623
Well, they say that great minds do think alike
Don't go too far. The next chapter is almost done.

[The Yaoi Mistress]

jajajajajajajaja!! that was so funny!!

[Dark Flame]

Not gonna lie, I personally don't enjoy doing... um that, to women but hey you gotta give to receive right? Although I have always wondered; do people that perform oral sex enjoy it? I mean um I enjoy receiving it, but not giving it.... sounds selfish but I still give what I get lol. So um... yeah this was interesting and, well, can't wait for the next chapter I guess.

[bahatumay]

2837438
I'm not really sure, but if there's one thing I've learned from my time on the internet, it's that fetishes know no bounds...

[Dark Flame]

2837981 Woah there pardner, what chu been watching hmmmm?

[MoonMirror]

Eating out is one of my favourite things. Tripe is delicious as well, yet to try grasshoppers though.